She was wide awake when her iPhone alarm rang. She had been awake all night - again.

"I'll get up today," she told herself. "I'll shower and get dressed. I'll go to class."

She didn't move.

Seven days had passed since the 21-year-old Baylor University student was raped at an off-campus party in March 2012. She knew her assailant from an English elective class they had taken. She says he cornered her in a dark parking lot, then pushed into her car.

It had been four days since she tried to get help. Four days since someone with Baylor Health Services said she waited too long for a sexual assault exam; four days since a campus police officer said she should think twice before filing criminal charges; four days since she tried to get counseling on campus only to be put on a waiting list.

"We weren't sure what we should do," her mother recalled. "Should we just have her come home?"

The English major stared at the ceiling of her small bedroom in her apartment just off campus in Waco and closed her eyes; tears streamed down her face.

"I just wanted to die," she told the Houston Chronicle, describing the moment. "I didn't want to feel anything, to see anyone, to feel the pain I was feeling and the guilt I was feeling.

"It was clear no one cared about me anyway. What was the point?"

She would not get up that day. Or the next.

The Chronicle reviewed 12 cases dating to 2004 in which sexual assault victims at Baylor University said they came forward only to be met with ambivalence or skepticism by the school. Eight of the women filed lawsuits describing how Baylor constituencies - from campus police to the university health center to a dorm chaplain - struggled to provide timely counseling, didn't push for charges or additional protections for the victims, and failed to offer support to manage day-to-day college life.

Five of the Baylor victims, along with their family and friends, shared similar experiences in interviews with the Chronicle. One is already suing the university; two others are planning litigation.

"I was treated like I committed the crime," said a woman who was 20 years old when she says she was attacked in 2013. She has hired an attorney. "No one ever made it clear to me what my rights were, or if I had any."

High-profile sexual assault cases against two Baylor football players last year prompted the school to commission an outside investigation, which concluded that the university and its athletic department systematically failed students who were sexually assaulted during the period reviewed - 2012 through 2015. University administrators "directly discouraged complainants from reporting" the crimes, and actions by leadership suggested "football was above the rules." The school president, athletic director and head football coach lost their jobs as a result.

The Chronicle's findings reveal that Baylor's institutional failures with sexual assault victims go back more than a decade and extend well beyond the athletic department, as eight of the cases involved an assailant who wasn't an athlete.

Most of the women said they were questioned about their motives or behavior - several were asked about drinking alcohol and what they were wearing, perpetuating a "blame the victim" mentality. By policy, the Chronicle doesn't identify victims of sexual assault without their permission. Several of the victims would speak only with the promise of anonymity.

Without identifying the women, the Chronicle presented Baylor University with a summary of its findings, including specific anecdotes and accusations. School officials declined interview requests regarding the cases.

"Due to the deeply personal and sensitive nature of individual cases and federal law, we do not publicly address specific cases, even when a student publicly shares details or reports of his or her own experience," the university said in a statement to the Chronicle. "We respect survivors' freedom to choose whether, when and how to share their experiences."

The university responded to some broader questions via email and made one official available to discuss ongoing reform efforts. For example, the school recently named two executive-level task forces to implement changes to improve protocols, communication and training when dealing with sexual violence, said Patty Crawford, the university's Title IX coordinator.

"We know that if students don't feel comfortable in knowing how to report," she said, "we can't create remedies and create prevention programs, so it's really important."

SUFFERING ALONE:'No one really cared'

Several of the former students described bouts of depression and anxiety in the weeks and months after their assaults. One student attempted suicide, and another was hospitalized for anxiety, according to court filings. One former student said she developed an eating disorder.

In a lawsuit filed in June, a woman says she was raped her freshman year in 2005 and reported the attack to various Baylor campus departments, including an assistant dean. As her grades began to slip, the assistant dean advised her to "withdraw from the university," she said in court papers.

"I felt so stupid, so worthless," the former student said in an interview. "I found out the hard way that no one really cared what happened to me. That changes the way you look at everything. What was the point of doing anything? … I didn't know who else to turn to."

Federal Title IX rules require schools to provide academic support and services. They also mandate protections and corrective action for women who experience sexual harassment, violence or coercion on campus.

According to lawsuits, several Baylor victims said they asked for academic assistance ranging from extra time to complete assignments to postponement of tests. Only one student says she was allowed to retake a test.

Such testimonials compound the crushing revelations for Baylor, long celebrated for its Christian values, principles and outreach to help others. "We acknowledge our failures in the past and take responsibility," the school said in an email to the Chronicle.

Even though years have passed for some victims, they still fear the stigma often associated with rape, particularly after they say Baylor officials and employees greeted them with questions and doubts.

"I still worry what people think, my family thinks," said a woman who was a senior in April 2014 when she says she was assaulted. "I worry that people won't believe me, that they will say I am lying about it."

Crawford says she has spent the past year training various university offices on how to make sure students know their rights and get access to services. Before then, Baylor didn't have a Title IX office. It opened in November 2014.

SEEKING COUNSELING: 'I was just more confused and hurt'

Baylor University's website says walk-ins are welcome for counseling services on the second floor of the McLane Student Life Center. The center has "counselors available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week for Baylor students."

A mother of one of the Baylor students called the center two days after her daughter was attacked in April 2012, according to a lawsuit. The mother told the center that her daughter "had just been raped" and she was seeking services "to help mitigate the effects of such a traumatic event."

The counseling center informed her that it was "too busy" to take another appointment, according to the complaint.

According to another lawsuit, a third-year Baylor student said she reached out to the counseling center in June 2014, one week after she was raped. She said she had "multiple interactions" with the center and was never informed that she had the right to pursue criminal and Title IX investigations of her attack.

"The lack of knowledgeable staff … has severely impaired her physical and mental health," her lawsuit states.

The former student who was raped in March 2012 recalled how the counselor seemed kind when she visited just two days after she was attacked. She said the counselor told her that the meeting was an assessment and that she would schedule an appointment for a counseling session.

During the review, the counselor didn't ask for the identity of the woman's attacker, according to the victim. She didn't ask her if she called the police, nor did she ask if someone was watching over her or if she felt she was still in danger.

The counselor, the former student said, gave her a few pamphlets - one on surviving sexual assault, one on how alcohol can affect judgment, one with a list of phone numbers and websites for other Baylor campus resources, like academic affairs.

"When I got up and went there that morning, I did believe I was doing the right thing by trying to get help," the woman recalled. "When I left … I was just more confused and hurt."

In any case involving a possible sexual assault, counseling and medical services should be made available promptly, as should any other assistance to ensure that a victim feels safe, said Neena Chaudhry, director of education and senior counsel for the National Women's Law Center.

"The school has to make sure there is no harassment or ongoing retaliation," she said. "That's a real concern."

Of the cases reviewed by the Chronicle, nine of the students sought help from the university's health center, including counseling services. Most of the women struggled to get into sessions. One woman said she had to wait three weeks for her first appointment.

Four of the women eventually went to counseling, only to discover that the number of free sessions was limited. The woman who was raped in 2004 says in her lawsuit said that after exhausting her allotted sessions, she was told "she would have to seek treatment elsewhere."

GOING TO THE POLICE: 'It felt like he didn't believe me'

The Baylor junior recalled how her mother was crying through the phone, trying to stifle her emotions to offer advice.

The student had just described how she was raped less than a week earlier. She was at a house party off campus in September 2013, and things went too far, and she couldn't stop it. Since then, she hadn't been able to eat or sleep.

"My mom told me she would come as soon as she could," the woman said in an interview. "She told me to go report it to the police and that she would help me with everything when she got there."

The Baylor Police Department told her to come in and give a statement. After listening to her describe the attack, she said a police officer asked a variety of questions about how much she drank, whether she was in a relationship with her attacker, and whether she was sure he knew it wasn't consensual.

She told him she had a couple of beers. She said they had hung out a few times. She told him she never consented. Yes, she was sure.

"It felt like he didn't believe me," she said. "It felt like he was judging me; I started to worry about what I was doing."

The police officer told her she didn't need to decide right then if she wanted to press charges - she should think about it. "He told me, 'Situations like this are tough. There's a lot of he-said, she-said involved, and it can be tricky,' " she recalled.

The line of questioning was deeply "troublesome," Chaudhry said, because it suggests a lack of training on how to properly interview a victim. For example, "Are you concerned for your safety?" was an obvious question that should have been asked, she said.

In lawsuits, two former students said they never heard from campus police after initiating a report, and another former student said the police "refused to take" one.

University employees, including campus police, should never discourage a student from filing a report, according to a report by the White House Task Force to Protect Students from Sexual Assault, released in 2014. Schools are responsible for providing "a safe learning environment for all students" and helping survivors "reclaim their educations," the report concluded.

Crawford, Baylor's Title IX coordinator, said campus police have been instructed to take a report whenever there's an indication of an assault and forward it as a potential Title IX violation. She said she couldn't say what the policy was prior to 2015.

Baylor police records are not public. The department did not respond to numerous requests for comment about these specific cases or its protocols on handling sexual assault reports.

SEEING MY ATTACKER: 'It was too much to handle'

He was walking just ahead, maybe 20 steps away, as she stepped outside after a science class in January 2005. Her throat began to burn, and she gasped for air as she turned back into the building and rushed to the nearest bathroom.

She slammed a stall door shut and crouched over the toilet to throw up.

Four months had passed since he attacked her at a fraternity party - the first one she had ever gone to. The 18-year-old freshman couldn't chance seeing him again. She stayed in the bathroom another 45 minutes.

She had tried to get help, according to her lawsuit against Baylor. She said she reported the attack to campus police. She answered several questions, then went home and never heard back from anyone. In court papers, the former student said she would see her attacker once a week. She struggled academically and emotionally for years.

"I lost a lot of weight. I barely spoke to my friends anymore," she said in an interview. "It was a really tough time."

According to the lawsuits, three students went directly to the Baylor Police Department and two went to the university president's office to report sexual assaults. Others told their professors, the Baylor Judicial Affairs office, a dorm chaplain, the university vice provost, the Baylor Advocacy Center, two athletic department officials and the Title IX Office.

In each case, the former student said she was given little direction or offered vague promises that something would be done. Most of the women said they later saw their assailant around campus in the weeks and months that followed. Four women said the university did nothing to prevent such encounters, according to court records.

"When victims see their attackers every day, it can cause a number of issues, from physical to mental health problems," Chaudhry said. "That's why it's important to make accommodations, like class schedule changes to ensure the victim feels safe."

When a victim has made a sexual assault complaint, the school should be certain that he or she is aware of all available resources, such as victim advocacy, housing assistance, academic support and legal assistance, according to the Department of Education. A school's inaction may subject the student to a hostile environment, federal guidelines state.

In the case of the Baylor freshman, she decided to try to forget about the attack. She had academic scholarships to worry about. But she struggled to go to class. Her grades were dropping.

Reporting on the Baylor victims' stories: 'These are real women'

Hear the story behind the story from the Chronicle's Jenny Dial Creech

"It was too much to handle," she said in an interview.

She would go on to fail three classes that semester and be placed on academic probation. By the end of the school year, she had dropped out of Baylor and moved home.

MOVING ON: 'It's taken a lot'

The English major who couldn't get out of bed in 2012 would later graduate from Baylor University. She is engaged and teaching at an elementary school in Houston.

One morning in late May, tough memories came flooding back while she was sitting in her dentist's office.

Social media and news outlets were abuzz about Baylor. The university had released the findings of the outside investigation it commissioned regarding sexual assaults on campus. Pepper Hamilton, the law firm that carried out the review, cited a culture of denial about sexual violence throughout the administration.

There it was. Proof. It wasn't just her. She wasn't wrong to feel alone, betrayed. She doesn't remember much about the cavity filling that day.

Frequently Asked Questions About the cases The Houston Chronicle found and reviewed 12 cases in which former Baylor students describe how the university responded to their reports of sexual assault. September 2004 A Baylor freshman says she was raped by another student at a house off campus in Waco and reported the assault to a Baylor University dorm chaplain, dorm hall director, the Baylor Police Department, Baylor Health Center and an assistant dean. She filed a lawsuit against Baylor University on June 15 in the U.S. District Court of Texas Waco Division. She is joined by two plaintiffs who claim Baylor violated federal Title IX regulations by failing to investigate and report their attacks and provide supportive services. 2005 A Baylor student says she was raped at an off-campus bar by another student and reported the assault to a Baylor professor, the Baylor Health Center, Baylor Police Department and the University President's office. On June 28, the former student and two other former students joined the lawsuit that was filed on June 15 in the U.S. District Court of Texas Waco Division. Like the others, they claim Baylor violated Title IX regulations by failing to investigate and report their attacks and to provide supportive services. November 2005 A Baylor freshman says she was raped in a campus dorm room by another student and reported the assault to the Baylor Health Center, the Baylor Counseling Center and Baylor Police Department, according to a lawsuit filed against Baylor University in the U.S. District Court of Texas Waco Division. She is among the three plaintiffs who later joined the lawsuit that was originally filed June 15. March 2012 A Baylor junior says she was raped in a parking lot off campus by another student and reported the assault to Baylor Police Department, Baylor Counseling Center and the Baylor Health Center. She recently described her ordeal to the Chronicle, in which she said she didn't get support from the campus police or the counseling center. April 2012 A Baylor student says she was raped at a house in Waco near campus by another student and reported the assault to the Baylor Health Center, Waco Police Department, Baylor Academic Services and the athletic department. She filed a lawsuit March 30 in the U.S. District Court of Texas Waco Division against Baylor University and two of its individual employees, claiming they violated federal Title IX regulations by failing to investigate and report her attack and to provide supportive services. Her attacker - a former Baylor football player - is serving a prison sentence for the crime. September 2013 A Baylor student says she was raped by another student at a Waco apartment near the university campus and reported the assault to the Baylor Police Department, the Baylor Counseling Center and a professor. She has hired legal representation and says she plans to file a lawsuit. She discussed her case in an interview with the Chronicle. Fall 2013 through December 2015 A Baylor student says she was harassed and assaulted by another student several times over a two-year period and reported the assault to the Baylor Counseling Center, the Baylor Health Center and the Baylor Police Department. She is among the three plaintiffs who filed a lawsuit against Baylor University on June 15 in the U.S. District Court of Texas Waco Division. April 2014 A Baylor student says she was raped in campus housing by another student and reported the assault to the Baylor Health Center and the Baylor Advocacy Center. She is among the three plaintiffs who filed a lawsuit against Baylor University on June 15 in the U.S. District Court of Texas Waco Division. April 2014 A third-year Baylor student says she was raped by another student and reported the assault to the Counseling Center and Baylor Judicial Affairs. She was among three plaintiffs who joined a lawsuit against Baylor University in the U.S. District Court of Texas Waco Division. The three former students filed their claim June 28. April 2014 A Baylor senior says she was raped by another student at an off-campus party. She reported the assault to the Baylor Counseling Center, the Baylor Advocacy Center and the university's Student Life Center. The former student has hired legal representation and says she plans to sue the school. She discussed her case in an interview with the Chronicle. February 2015 A Baylor student says she was raped at a house off campus in Waco and reported the assault to Baylor University's Title IX office, Vice Provost's Office and Student Life Department. She filed a lawsuit on June 20 in the U.S. District Court of Texas Waco Division against Baylor University and two of its individual employees. She claims the defendants violated Title IX regulations by failing to investigate and report her attack and to provide supportive services. March 2015 A Baylor student alleges she was raped at an off-campus apartment by another student and reported the assault to Title IX, the Baylor Police Department and Baylor's Human Resources Department. She discussed her case in an interview with the Chronicle. Baylor FAQs How does Title IX apply to student-on-student sexual violence? Under Title IX, federally funded schools must ensure that students of all ages are not denied or limited in their ability to participate in or benefit from the school's educational programs or activities on the basis of sex. A school violates a student's rights under Title IX regarding student-on-student sexual violence when the following conditions are met: (1) the alleged conduct is sufficiently serious to limit or deny a student's ability to participate in or benefit from the school's educational program, i.e. creates a hostile environment; and (2) the school, upon notice, fails to take prompt and effective steps reasonably calculated to end the sexual violence, eliminate the hostile environment, prevent its recurrence, and, as appropriate, remedy its effects. -Department of Education What policies and procedures should be in place at a school under Title IX regulations? Every school must have a Title IX Coordinator who manages complaints. The Coordinator's contact information should be publicly accessible on the school's website. If you decide to file a complaint, your school must promptly investigate it regardless of whether you report to the police. A school may not wait for the conclusion of a criminal proceeding and should conclude its own investigation within a semester's time (the 2011 Office for Civil Rights Title IX guidance proposes 60 days as an appropriate time-frame). The school should use a "preponderance of the evidence" standard to determine the outcome of a complaint, meaning discipline should result if it is more likely than not that discrimination, harassment and/or violence occurred. The final decision should be provided to you and the accused in writing. Both of you have the right to appeal the decision. -Department of Education What should a school do once a sexual complaint is filed? Along with issuing a no contact directive to the accused, a school must ensure that any reasonable changes to your housing, class or sports schedule, campus job, or extracurricular activity and clubs are made to ensure you can continue your education free from ongoing sex discrimination, sexual harassment or sexual violence. These arrangements can occur before a formal complaint, investigation, hearing, or final decision is made regarding your complaint. It also can continue after the entire process since you have a right to an education free of sex-based discrimination, harassment or violence. -Department of Education What procedures are in place now for University of Baylor staff members when sexual assault is reported to them? Baylor University's Title IX policy, "Sex Discrimination, Sexual Violence, and Sexual Harassment," was approved on Aug. 20, 2015 as part of our ongoing improvements to Title IX response. The policy can be found online at http://www.baylor.edu/titleIX/doc.php/249242.docx. As a part of mandatory faculty and staff training, instructions are given for mandatory reporting responsibilities. Additionally, some faculty and staff are designated as confidential employees and they receive additional training for their roles. -Baylor University What procedural changes have been made at Baylor in light of the Pepper Hamilton report? The University has begun addressing Pepper Hamilton's 105 recommendations, which Interim President David E. Garland considers mandates. As announced on June 10, 2016, Baylor launched two complementary executive-level task forces to implement change that leads to improved processes, communication, training and response related to sexual violence. Please see the news release, "Baylor University Names Task Forces to Act Upon 105 Recommendations and Implement Improvements to Address Sexual Violence Prevention and Response." The Teams will report their progress on an ongoing basis to the Baylor community. We're committed to and have already begun to implement changes in order to provide a safe and supportive environment for students, faculty and staff. -Baylor University

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"I was numb," she said. "I wasn't sure how to feel about any of it."

Several victims said the headlines were a validation, but the news brought back tough feelings about a school that they felt betrayed them.

"I still think about it every day," said the woman who was a senior in 2014 when she was attacked. "It's taken a lot for me to move on, get a job, have a life."

Of the cases reviewed by the Chronicle, four women went on to graduate from Baylor, and one is still enrolled there. The others either dropped out of college or transferred. Several have found each other over the years, creating an informal support group. They have conversations via text and social media.

"Having solidarity helps," said a Baylor graduate who says she was raped in 2015. "Being able to have something weighing on you at 2 a.m. and being able to message someone who feels the same way provides comfort."

Baylor vows that it is working to change how it treats sexual assault victims, noting that the size of the university's Title IX staff has been tripled. Interim President David. E. Garland says the 105 reform recommendations by Pepper Hamilton are now mandates.

"It's something," said the woman now teaching in Houston. "But it's not enough, really. It's not enough to take away the past."

Some of the victims expressed guarded optimism as Baylor moves forward, but they wonder if the institutional culture toward sexual assault will really change.

"The thing is, I went to Baylor for a few pretty specific reasons, the big one being that it was rooted in Christian faith and that's important to me," said the woman who was assaulted her senior year in 2014. "Nothing about my experience reflected that."

jenny.creech@chron.comtwitter.com/jennydialcreech