All of these marvelous advancements in femme-engineering can only mean one thing: it’s time to admit that the planned obsolescence of the female on Earth is nearly complete.

Let’s face it: No one really needs women. I know we shy away from admitting this fact, but women are extras, accessories, pretty faces, willing targets, overbearing mothers, nags. From Eve’s first bite of that shiny apple to Hillary Clinton’s electoral failure, women have been a detriment to society at large. That’s why it’s so great that the final obsolescence of women is at hand.

Up until recently, women were needed. Without women bearing the brunt of mammalian reproduction and birthing our live young, the human species would go extinct. But we were more than reproducers: as a result of our natural attributes we were enjoyable to look at. It was in that capacity that we were sought after for the pleasure we could provide, as a receptacle for male vulnerability and sperm. We were looked upon as mothers and nurturers.

In reproduction and attractiveness, women knew their contribution to society might be valued. We knew that society at large would need our bodies, as mothers and whores. Heretofore we were relevant, at least in the limited, physical capacity of what our subservient bodies could provide. But no more. Ladies, step off. Contemporary society has dispatched us with no undue haste.

Sex robots are here, with all the friend benefits a man could dream of. Artificial wombs are nearly ready for manufacture. Discarded embryos and aborted fetal tissue are primed for cloning and implantation, eliminating the need for our mitochondria.

Men have proclaimed themselves be 100 percent up to snuff in the mother department. No more are mothers themselves deemed a necessary part of child development, not when men have become so in touch with their maternal side. Cover Girl has a cover boy, and beauty has never been more femme-male.

Trans women are way prettier, leggier, and in shape than the average bio-girl, and with way less uterine fuss. All of these marvelous advancements in femme-engineering can only mean one thing: it’s time to admit that the planned obsolescence of the female on Earth is nearly complete.

Sexbots Can’t Say No

When these rechargeable honeys hit the mass market, women should breathe a sigh of relief. Rapists, purveyors of rape culture, and those guys who feel it’s their right to take a little grab will have a new outlet for their penile aggression. These sex robots can’t say no.

A sex robot is really the best way to go for a carefree screw. This option, while not as cheap as your average prostitute, provides an amazing opportunity to stick your penis into something that will provide no mess, no emotional problems, won’t take up any of your precious bureau space, ask for keys, or want to meet your mother.

Once the sex robot is out of the package and in the bed, or on the couch, or the kitchen table, or in the closet, she will never say no—unless you’re into that sort of thing. She will do anal without making you buy her a lobster dinner first. She will do double vaginal with you and a cucumber if you want her to.

Also, with what are bound to be vastly customizable options, it’s easy to imagine all of the variations on things like gag reflexes, vaginal and anal tightness, nipple arousal, grip, suction power, etc. All of this, and her consent is yours as soon as the transaction clears your PayPal account and you get her in your hands. All of the beauty and body of a bio-girl, but without any of her detractors. No pesky opinions, perspectives, moods, hang-ups, and most importantly, no mess.

So Many Reasons to Love a Sex Synth

What’s really great is that the relationship with your very own sex robot doesn’t have to end at the artificial labia. Sex robot creator and Abyss Creations founder Matt Mullen says he hopes his customers will emotionally bond with these animatronic dolls: “I want to have people actually develop an emotional attachment to not only the robot but the actual character behind it — to develop some kind of love for this being,” he says. I don’t think that will be too much of a problem. In fact, I think it’s reasonable to assume that many men will want to marry their sex robots.

There are so many reasons to love a sex synth: they don’t talk back, they’ll never question male authority, flirt with the neighbors, or work outside the home. Of course, their physical characteristics will be far superior to those of the bio girl—perma-perky breasts, no risk of stretch marks, a thigh gap!

In the biological realm they’ve got bio-girls beat as well. Sex synths don’t bleed. Bleeding is one of the things that makes women gross. With a little lube, a sex robot’s pussy can be a paradisical slip n’ slide all 28 days of the lunar month. What a paradise! I don’t know why every man on the planet wouldn’t prefer a squeaky clean puss to one that bleeds.

Men who put a ring on a sex synth will likely value these traditionally female characteristics, and as the industry grows, so, too, will its ability to perform other, traditionally female, tasks. For example, birthing live young and nurturing those young to adulthood.

Women and Children, Made to Order

Here’s the scenario. A man wants the perfect woman, so he orders her, custom made, from Abyss Creations or one of their soon-to-be knock-off competitors. Specifically designed and manufactured to his precise specifications, she will arrive fully loaded, and ready to go, straight from the box.

At such time as he hears the ticking of his male biological clock, he buys some eggs— frozen fresh, straight from an Estonian egg harvesting facility—and sends them on to the lab along with his own seed. The lab grows the mix in an artificial womb, and when it’s ready, this Uber dad can take the newborn home to its artificial mommy.

Motherless children will never know what it’s like to have a bio-mom, and they will suckle the artificially engorged teats of the sex synth right next to their proud papas.

Once we have the technology to combine an artificial womb with a sex synth, women of the world, look out. Motherless children will be all the rage, and they’ll never know what they’re missing.