EXPERTS who stressed the historic link between populism and the threat of war have told everyone to go fuck themselves.

As Britain raised the prospect of a war with Spain and Donald Trump set out his desire to annihilate North Korea, experts said they were ‘just so incredibly surprised’.

Julian Cook, author of Wars and How They Happen, said: “Every day for the last two years I have told anyone who will listen that populists really love the idea of war.

“And every fucking day all these arseholes were like, ‘what do you know, you so-called expert?’.

“No, you’re right, you’re all geniuses and I’ve only been studying this for 30 fucking years. You can all shit off.”

Meanwhile, foreign secretary Boris Johnson has insisted that ‘War with Spain’ was written on the side of his bicycle during the Brexit campaign.

He added: “The letters had to be very small to fit on the crossbar of my Grifter.”