On August 26, 1911, King George V formally warranted the NZ Coat of Arms which, as you all know, is nowhere near as useful as an actual coat in this cold little country of ours.

However, it is something a country needs for those times when a really flash letterhead just won't do or if you've just spent $7 million dollars on a building and want something natty to put in the centre space above the entranceway.

Before that, New Zealand didn't have its own coat. Instead we borrowed the British Royal Arms from 1840 until 1911. Chur, cuz.

Supplied The first New Zealand Coat of Arms, shown here, was officially warranted in 1911. It was changed in 1956.

In 1906 some geezer – (although Kate Sheppard secured women the right to vote in 1893, geezers still made all the major decisions) – decided to have a design competition for New Zealand's Coat of Arms.

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Supplied New Zealand's coat of arms in red was a design for the flag referendum by Ross Larsen.

A bit of a dag started a rumour that all the design entries were destroyed by a fire in the old Parliament Buildings in 1907 but yeah, nah, the submissions are still held in Archives New Zealand so calm your farm.

Another competition to design our coat of arms was held and, in April 1908, Minister of Internal Affairs John G. Findlay, advertised in the local rag.

Up for grabs were cash prizes of £20 and £15, for first and second place respectively, to design an official coat of arms for the "dominion of New Zealand".

Kiwis really went to town and there were 75 designs featuring moa, lions, sheep, kiwi, cows, ships, stars, Maori warriors, British soldiers and Union Jacks and probably a kitchen sink or two.

I couldn't find any entries with moa with sunbeams shooting from their eyes, but it wouldn't surprise me if there was one.

The geezers sat around twiddling their moustaches trying to find a winner and eventually three entries were sent to mothership Britain for final judging.

The winning design was entry No 75, by James McDonald, a draughtsman for the Department of Tourist and Health Resorts.

His design boasted a demi-lion, the upper half of a rampant genderless lion with its tongue out; four stars representing the Southern Cross constellation; a golden fleece representing the farming industry; a wheat sheaf representing agriculture and two hammers representing mining and industry.

There were also three ships representing the importance of sea trade and the immigrant nature of all New Zealanders.

But it wasn't until 106 years ago, on August 26, 1911, that McDonald's design was officially accepted.

Officially it's called the Armorial Bearings of the Dominion of New Zealand but I think we can all politely agree that's just not as catchy a title.

However, before design No 75 could officially be accepted it had to be "tidied up".

By "tidied up" it appears they meant "take the coolest bits out". The Maori Chieftain was redrawn to be "less challenging" and the beautifully ornate Maori carvings at the bottom were replaced by flash gold twigs or, as they called it, "more conventional" decoration.

Did you think that chick on the left in the white frock was the Queen?

Nah. It's Zealandia, daughter of Britannia and arguably a distant cousin to the Statue of Liberty.

The national personification of New Zealand, Zealandia is the mother of our country.

Like many mothers, she is rarely seen, except on our coat of arms or, possibly, hanging the coat of arms on the washing line after somebody's spilled pavlova all over it.

Zealandia had to also be "tidied up" to meet official approval.

She was changed from the original drawing to be "more demure". This is clearly bonkers as Zealandia is obviously a cool chick who has inspired modern Zealandia woman who can do everything including govern the country with grace and style.

It was around this time that some bright spark stated the obvious and the motto "Onward" underneath the arms was changed to "New Zealand". Tu meke. Choice.

The crest was also altered to St Edward's Crown to symbolise that the Queen is the lead boss chick in our realm, while Zealandia and the Maori Chieftain were altered so they were looking towards each other.

Although the Royal Warrant of 1911 gave a clear description of the New Zealand Coat of Arms, Kiwis, being the innovative No-8 wire sorts they are, had come up with more than 20 versions of it in use by the mid 1940s.

A committee was set up to organise the standardisation of the coat of arms but they didn't rattle their dags. It took around 10 years before the revised version finally got the Queen's tick of approval in 1956.

It's the coat of arms we still use today.

However, there are not many places you can catch a squiz at it.

If you're ever in court you might see it, behind the Judge's head. Or you can spot it on an Act of Parliament or perhaps on your passport as you're leaving Aotearoa.

If you ever want to use the distinctive heraldic bearings of our country anywhere, there are strict rules you must follow and you have to get permission from the Ministry of Culture and Heritage. Usually they say "sweet as" but you do have to check.