Liberals are all about freedom…their freedom to tell us Normal Americans what to think, how to feel, and what to do. And the highest form of liberalism is the ban, a bar to an activity, institution, or attitude that they wish to suppress either to enhance their own power or just for the sheer joy of telling people like us – who they hate – what to do. Often, it’s both.

The following ten targets for prohibition may seem wacky now, but give the left time. “Really?” you might ask. But then, a decade ago everyone knew which bathroom to use, yet here we are. In my three novels about what America would look like if it split into red and blue halves, I tried to invent the craziest aspirations of libs gone wild. And my predictions keep coming true. Mark my words, it’s just a matter of time before they really do resurrect J. Edgar Hoover as an icon of non-binary gender identity.

The following bans are going to happen, as nutty as they may sound. Maybe not tomorrow, and maybe not completely at first, but they will. They can’t not happen, because the fascist imperative of leftism is control, control over every aspect of normal peoples‘ lives.

10. Pets

That’s insane! Why, liberals would never ban the cats who provide the sole companionship for the lonely, bitter middle-aged divorcees who make up a key Democrat demographic. But wait – California has already banned sales of non-rescue pets in pet stores, so their paw is in the door. Can’t you see SJWs whining about “pet privilege?” How about PETA people insisting that these furry clumps of cells have rights, unlike the clumps of human cells in a uterus?

9. All-Male Sports

Frankly, this one is so obvious that it’s a wonder it hasn’t happened yet. Football, baseball, basketball, hockey – the top sports leagues are 100% male. Now, let’s leave aside the obvious truth that a woman able to compete with these male behemoths would be a sensation, and that if she could make tackles or home runs or whatever like a man, the fans would be delighted. But no, it’s clearly a conspiracy on the part of the patriarchy, as is biology itself, apparently.

8. Accurate Pronouns

California already requires certain healthcare workers to lie about the sex of their patients if the patient demands it. In some places, people like teachers are getting fired for refusing to falsely state that a girl is a boy because she wants to be. Pretty soon, this nonsense will spread. Now, it won’t just be by law (though it will be in government situations). Businesses, which are usually gutless in the face of howling SJW mobs, will increasingly demand that their employees praise the emperor’s new clothes.

7. Fossil Fuel Cars

California is already toying with this, and Stephen Hawking’s protégé Alexandria Ocasio-Cortes seems to want to make it part of the “Green New Deal.” Now, it’s a pretty good deal for the urban hipster crowd that can walk or bike or take the subway to their crappy jobs, but for Normals who live in the suburbs or the country, it’s a disaster. So much the better. Remember, like all liberal prohibitions, a huge part of the appeal of this measure is how it puts us uppity rubes in our place.

6. Hunting

Well, of course. Once again, the lure of jamming their power down the throats of the flyover Americans the coastal liberals hate is irresistible. We’re already seeing this as ridiculous municipalities refuse to take commonsense measures against deer overpopulation and marauding coyotes. The commonsense response is to shoot them, but instead the libs dither as deer starve, citizens get hurt in collisions, and as puppies and kittens get snatched away and devoured by predators who just don’t belong around people.

5. Private Doctors

This is absolutely essential to the idea behind single payer – they can’t leave you with anywhere else to go. Nor can they tolerate the “inequality” that would occur should you decide to spend your own money on the medical care you want. Plus, if doctors have somewhere else to practice outside the government system, which will be like the VA without the patient care and efficiency, then they will do that. Remember, single payer is about control, and the government needs indentured servants to toil for it.

4. Guns

“Nobody wants to ban your guns!” they lie. Liberals are such awful gaslighters – one of the lefty fishwraps will run an op-ed by some prominent Democrat demanding gun confiscation and the moment we take notice the rest of the libs will look at us with straight faces and insist that “Nobody wants to ban your guns!” You would think they would lie better considering all their experience. In any case, this has been a key goal for decades for two reasons. First, of course, is the sheer joy of showing us bitter clingers who’s boss. But the second is more practical – disarmed, we’d be transformed from citizens into serfs, and we would have no means of resisting their most hideous prohibitions…or worse.

3. Religion

It’s already started – witness the shameful interrogation of believing Christians who have been nominated to the courts and other offices. Oh, the l;ibs won’t say they want to ban religion (by which they mean traditional Christianity and Judaism). They’ll just make it impossible for you to both practice your faith and participate in society. You can believe what you want, for a while, as long as you never act on it or tell anyone. Liberals cannot tolerate heretics who refuse to bow down to the false god of leftist ideology. Just watch what happens when President Trump nominates committed Catholic Amy Coney Barret…

2. Free Speech

In England, you can get arrested for saying things – but only things the elite dislikes. The left would love to do that here too. Who thinks that if they had the power that they would not ban “hate speech” – that is, speech they disapprove of – and that a liberal Supreme Court majority would not eagerly find a hitherto unknown footnote in the First Amendment allowing it? Just look at college campuses, and what they did with their power there, then imagine our whole country exactly like that.

1. Conservatives

Prohibit an entire ideology? The left would never do that, except they are totally trying to do it. Political tests already exist in academia, Hollywood and the mainstream media – and conservatives fail. Their goal is to eventually drive conservatives out of all non-political positions of power, with driving them out of political power to follow, ably assisted by the cowardly Fredocon contingent of gimpcon fellow travelers like Mitt Romney. But in the meantime, their pals in Silicon Valley are already hard at work slowly eliminating conservative voices from the web. Whether its Google suppressing searched, Facebook helping the Dems, or Twitter banishing dissenters, their goal is clear. It’s to totally eliminate conservative opposition to the liberal elite.

Go ahead and laugh, but remember that I told you so here and in my latest novel, Wildfire – and I’ll tell you so again once these bans happen, assuming they haven’t yet imprisoned or killed me...or you.