Levi Johnston has successfully marketed his "brand" after impregnating Bristol Palin. But what of his sister, Mercede, who impregnated no one? When will somebody pay her for being tangentially news-related? Soon, probably, now that she has a funny blog.

MercedeJohnston.com is definitely the best website of the year, even though we are only in June. Its structure is simple: responses to reader-submitted questions, which she apparently gets a lot of, with slyly interspersed amateur modeling audition photos. Talent agents? Investors? Hopefully you're paying attention.

Most of Mercede's Q&A is about her relationships with Bristol Palin, Sarah Palin, and her brother. And she's firmly dismissive of all of those old Palin conspiracy theories about whose baby was whose assuming the babies even exist, and so on.

But she also answers important questions.

How many teen pregnancies are there in Wasilla after the [Republican National Convention]?

Teen Pregnancy is HUGE here, unfortunately. Every day you find out someone else is expecting. It has most definitely increased since the RNC and I sincerely believe it is because they want the attention, money, and fame that Bristol has received.

Oh god that is so sad. Can someone tell the Wasilla teenage ladies that, despite what their horny boyfriends tell them, this is not exactly the way it works? Your mother kind of has to be the state governor, and then she has to be nominated for vice president? At least those were the rules in 2008.

Do I want to write a book?

I would LOVE to write a book. I only wish I knew how to go about doing so. I know that people would be drawn to my story if they had the chance to see it in print. I really hope to get the opportunity to write one sometime soon.

There is no excuse for Mercede Johnston not having a six-figure book deal right now.