Colbert: NSA needs its 'freaky three-way calling' David Edwards and Muriel Kane

Published: Thursday October 16, 2008





Print This Email This The revelation last week that the National Security Agency has routinely been listening to the personal phone calls of American soldiers, journalists, and aid workers abroad has led to fresh calls for government surveillance to be reined in.



Comedy Central's Stephen Colbert, however, was certain in his mock-pundit persona that "the terrorists are still out there plotting our destruction on the phone -- especially during free nights and weekends."



Colbert complained that the leaders of the Senate Intelligence and Judiciary Committees who have opened investigations of the new charges "think we're supposed to listen only to suspected terrorists. But it's a lot easier to listen to Americans -- they speak English. Duh."



Colbert then introduced Tonight's Word: Freaky Three-way Calling. Commenting on claims that NSA intercept operators had passed phone sex calls between soldiers and their spouses around the office like email jokes, Colbert insisted "this is exactly what the NSA should be monitoring."



"When people are having sex," Colbert explained, "they let their bar down. You can learn a lot about a person by which god's name they cry out right before they 'visit the holy land.'"



"Besides," noted Colbert, "listening to phone sex is a valuable tool in the war on terror -- if you know how to interpret it."



Suggesting that tapping the right phone sex call might even catch bin Laden, Colbert concluded, "I say to those opponents of warrantless wiretapping who ask, 'Where does the government get off listening to my private conversations?' You just got your answer. They're getting off at the NSA."



This video is from Comedy Central's The Colbert Report, broadcast October 15, 2008.









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