16 Surprising Ways to Injure Yourself When You’re Over 40



Our 5th most-read article of 2019

(Originally published September 12, 2019)

- - -

1. Reaching for your wallet at a farmers market.

2. Waving to your neighbor on your way to yoga.

3. Gesturing wildly during an argument with your spouse over which Property Brother is which.

4. Elbowing your way to the front of the free-sample line at Costco.

5. Bending over to admire a bulldog in a stroller.

6. Stirring a cup of particularly thick chowder.

7. Getting the mail when it includes the 14-lb Restoration Hardware Fall/Winter catalog.

8. Attempting to digest a slice of Sicilian pizza after 6 p.m.

9. Craning your neck to spy on your teen’s incoming text.

10. Pulling up a wet bathing suit.

11. Rolling your eyes behind your children’s backs.

12. Turning your head to make a left while driving.

13. Holding your cell phone to your ear for longer than 45 seconds.

14. Trying to wrap your head around mobile banking.

15. Carrying all your remote controls to the couch.

16. Standing up after you’ve been seated for more than 8 minutes.

- - -

Read an interview with Liz Alterman about writing this piece over on our Patreon page.