A new Christmas carol for Charlie Brown… and his ASSISTED SUICIDE –RECORDED LIVE!

Why do the holidays suck? • Who do we blame? • ISIS’ secret Yuletide recruitment tool. • The politically corrected, new, non-pipe-smoking, SLIM LINE Santa. • 5 worst Christmas songs of all time. (SPOILER ALERT – 2 of them were from BEATLES). • Psssst! John Lennon just pissed in your cocktail. • Which Christmas card to send / not send. • The new UNIVERSAL Christmas greeting.

Puke-inducing Christmas treats. • Why singles may hate holidays more than marrieds. • Why Dunkin Donuts beats the ass off Starbucks.

Banned North Korean Christmas meals REVEALED. • How to make your cat SING. • The holiday most likely to KILL YOU.

Forget secret Santa – meet SECRET JESUS.