MadBadDaddy Fri 04-May-18 00:41:58

(An invitation to pour scorn on a man for being an old credulous hippy and not for hating women)



Why not? I'm a bit , & you lot look like you could do with cheering up. There is a serious point here, but yes I am Mad, and here's how. I thought I'd share something original that is at least accusation-proof and, in my wildest dreams, debatable!



Here is the plate, hand me my ass. Bonus points for unconscious sexism.



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There is a magic to MN/Fem boards. I believe in magic.

Some boards feel like a Spell has been cast that aims to make a woman feel safe and trusted, as though it were an actual, physical 'Safe Space' (refuge, etc.).

The words of the Spell are the Rules of the Debate for a particular topic. The words are spoken in parts, in many posts and statements. The Rules of MN/Fem aim to create a 'Safe Space for All Women,' to talk or to listen and not be afraid. Fearless debate needs this as a minimum requirement.



A 'Safe Space' ceases to exist once it is compromised in any way. Any male presence will compromise it. If one woman feels compromised, all women are. A male presence is as much of an intrusion here as it would be in any physical space, but there is a difference.



Any male voice here is not destroying a Safe Space, it is breaking a Spell. The threat is almost identical, but there is no spell in a real-world shelter, just locks and doors. Your shelter has transparent walls and advertises its address. The personality of the board adds the locks & curtains and creates Seclusion. When secluded from Men, Women can feel safe.



Any debate with a Male presence can always be perfectly civil (depending on the male...) but there is a sense that the spell blows away a bit with every post I make. I notice it as I type, and as I read. I am intruding, whatever my intentions.



I see the impatience, irritation or frustration in some posts (not all aimed at me ), and they could be read as if it were the Spell that is being defended or complained about, rather than the Male presence that is being attacked.



As protective and powerful as it is, a Spell is not real like a wall is, it is an illusion. It is powered by belief. You are not secluded here, but can feel like you are. That is enough for the Spell to work. My voice reminds you of the illusion, but it was an illusion before I arrived.



The Spell serves a much-needed purpose, but it can sometimes be destructive if used without care. You are all magicians, whether you know it or not. If you cast the spell as a defensive reflex, what you are doing is a little like flinching. Sometimes a big, strong Shield can get in your way as much as your attacker's.



I'm not suggesting you change a thing, but just don't be fooled. Seclusion or isolation is a hard place to be if you want to get off your back foot.



As they used to say, blessed be!