Thirty-six years after its launch, MTV remains a vibrant ideas factory full of exciting and groundbreaking new formats. Last month they made the genius decision to bring back My Super Sweet 16, their spoilt brat coming-of-age reality show from the 00s. They’ve also announced they’re bringing back Cribs (their gawping at homes-of-rich people show from the 00s); Total Request Live (their live video countdown show from the 00s); and authenticity vehicle from the 90s MTV Unplugged, which is returning with a Shawn Mendes special. Where do they get all their ideas?

Of course, these rebooted shows will all go on to be sparkling successes, but there are some shows that MTV has had more of a struggle bringing back. These canned revivals that never made it to air have now been seen by the Guardian Guide for the first time …

Trading standards ... former chancellor George Osborne. Photograph: Getty

The Osbornes

Unable to sign any of the original cast, MTV retooled the show to focus on the family of London Evening Standard editor and former chancellor of the exchequer, George Osborne. Each week, George is given a new job by the producers but, in a twist, still continues to do all the other jobs from the previous week. This proves to be less of a challenge than programme-makers had previously hoped, with George actually signing up to the odd directorship and consultancy positions even when the cameras aren’t rolling. Luke and Liberty, the Osborne children, also prove to be a disappointment, mostly covering their faces during shooting, or occasionally shouting “He’s not my dad, I’ve never met him.”

Goop, she did it again ... Gwyneth Paltrow and some things that are sure to be organic and natural. Photograph: Benjamin Lozovsky/BFA/Rex/Shutterstock

Punk’d

MTV were thrilled when they signed Ashton Kutcher to host and executive produce another series of the prank show. Unfortunately, the star has mellowed somewhat since he was last on air, and is now a serious devotee of Kabbalah and a venture capital investor. The pilot episode’s pranks include: putting some cheap plastic furniture in a room Gwyneth Paltrow had just “hygged”; swapping all the low GI products in Anna Kendrick’s kitchen with unrefined alternatives; and promising funding to a tech start-up run by Casey Affleck, only for the funding to be dependent on a series of not-previously-negotiated profit targets.

There’s a car man … The Grand Tour’s James May. Photograph: Kimmo Mantyla/Rex/Shutterstock

Pimp My Ride

This new series of the show, in partnership with the Department for Transport and hosted by James May, sees millennials trying to electrify their crap £150 Gumtree cars ahead of the petrol-car ban of 2040. Stacey from Kent gets her fifth-hand Fiat Punto rewired so it can be charged with the same cable as her MacBook Pro, and James from Stoke’s white van is repurposed to hold 20,000 D cell batteries, which can power the car for up to 90 seconds and an inbuilt colour TV for more than 10 minutes.

Surprise, surprise ... could Stormzy be the new Cilla? Photograph: Suki Dhanda/The Observer

Making the Video

An update of the classic behind-the-scenes show, but reflective of the modern era where most artists make more content-based advertisements than they do music videos. Viewers will get to see what really went on when Little Mix made some beauty tutorials for Barry M and get a sneak peek of the making of an Adidas web video where Stormzy surprises unsuspecting fans with free trainers. The show becomes too meta when it goes behind the scenes of a Burberry Behind-the-Scenes of a Sampha Video.

Beer pong island ... springbreakers on holiday somewhere, yesterday. Photograph: Eric Reed/AP

Spring Break Live: UK

During the 90s, one of MTV’s biggest shows was a live broadcast from Daytona Beach, Florida, where thousands of drunk college students would compete in beer pong tournaments and wet T-shirt competitions in front of the biggest bands in the world. The British revival of the show lacked some of that titillation, focusing mostly on students embarking on unrewarding internship programmes with the hope of breaking into the tough graduate jobs market.

Bully for you ... Johnny Knoxville taking part in a typical Jackass stunt. Photograph: Paramount/Everett/Rex Features

Jackass

Changes in health and safety laws mean that protective clothing, goggles and a face mask must be worn before lighting any farts from a safe 10-metre distance. Takes the fun out somewhat.

Ready, set, go ... MTV, the early years. Photograph: Alamy

Music Videos

In their bravest move, MTV reboots its first ever programme: a series of music videos by the popular acts of the day. This proves to be a disaster, with viewers unable to understand why they couldn’t skip videos they didn’t like or search for that one video that suddenly popped into their head. MTV agrees that it is a ridiculous idea and, by way of apology, said the “M” in their name actually stands for “malevolence”, and commissions 10 more reality shows where young people undermine each other’s self-esteem.