We've just released unbelievable new audio recordings - taken while undercover - that prove just how deceptive and manipulative Virginia's CPCs really are. Here is what Virginia CPCs actually saying to women, as told to our investigator during two undercover visits: Condoms are "naturally porous” and do not protect against STDs (5:15) Women who have taken the birth control pill for four years prior to their first pregnancy have a 46% increased risk of breast cancer (7:00, 12:55) Having an abortion will damage all of your future relationships (38:00) If you have an abortion, you will see that child’s soul again in the future: "At the end of the world you’re gonna know that was my child that I choose to kill.” (47:30)

One of the creepier practices of anti-abortion groups is setting up phony crisis pregnancy centers explicitly intended to lure in women seeking actual medical care and instead providing them with "counseling" of dubious or nonexistent medical validity. Sooner or later one of them is going to get someone killed, but until then (or, let's face it, long after then) states like Virginia actively fund the scam efforts Of those, the two top are blatant lies, the third is a rather odd bit of psychoanalysis and the fourth is, well, let's just say it's NOT FREAKING MEDICAL ADVICE. Nevertheless, Virginia state dollars go towards paying people to lie to you because Jesus said so, and towards convincing sexually active women who are seeking medical care that they shouldn't be using condoms, shouldn't be using birth control, shouldn't be having sex at all and will probably be going to hell for even thinking about the A-word.

That does sound like a conservative paradise; add a little unnecessary lead poisoning or a few more bridge collapses and you'd have an outright utopia. And it would have to be the likes of Ken Cuccinelli propping up the state-sponsored scam, right? Really, if there was one guy you'd pretty much expect to see running the Republic of Gilead it'd be that guy. Hmm, or Rick Santorum. Okay—it'd be Rick Santorum as Grand Poobah, and Michele Bachmann as head of the Gilead science program, and Ken Cuccinelli would be the malevolent top advisor who goes around secretly poisoning other people's drinks. Even in a fantasy theocratic dystopia I can't really imagine Ken Cuccinelli as leadership material.