So I found out something fun today, they are making a new Robin Hood film. Now I love Robin Hood, I grew up reading the stories and watching the movies, The Adventures of Robin Hood is actually still one of my favourite films and I would recommend it to anyone in the mood for a fun adventure movie. That being said not every adaptation of the heroic outlaw has been a good one, namely 2010’s Robin Hood starring Russell Crowe. My disdain for Russell Crowe is well documented but he was far from the only thing wrong with this adaptation. Despite the genius that is Ridley Scott this film suffered in a big way from a trend of the late 2000’s/early 2010’s, the gritty reboot.

Ridley Scott and Russell Crowe tried to make the folk tale of Robin hood a gritty story about a soldier returning from war and it ended up a little grim and ultimately a bit of a bore. They stripped away the charm of the story making Robin Hood an unlikable character and deserter from the war having to impersonate a dead knight in an attempt to bring the myth into reality. Ultimately he becomes the legend people know but everything leading to that point is muddled, messy and a little bit sad. We don’t root for Robin until the very end and even then it feels like a bit of a chore. I’m not opposed to an origin story but I feel like this retelling of Robin Hood butchered the character while trying to do something different. I understand wanting to do something different but this went so wrong, but hey what do I know, this film made 300 million at the box office and I’m just a guy with a blog.

As usual I will start by addressing the problems mentioned above in depth and then creating my own plot synopsis. So as not to stray too far from the Ridley Scott version of the film I will still be writing this as if it was a Robin Hood origin story but there will be some notable differences, first of which.

CASTING:

Now this isn’t solely down to my hate of the charisma vacuum that is Russell Crowe because he wasn’t the only character miscast in this film and I feel it suffered because of it. There were A LOT of dodgy accents and off performances. Though some of this could be down to the script I am going to do away with a lot of the cast and replace them with actors I see as being more fit for the roles.

Robin Hood – Christian Bale.

If you really do want to go the gritty and serious route there are few actors better than Christian Bale. He has a seriousness that is matched by few. He proved he can do action with the Batman films and he’s pretty much the best thing about anything he is in…the exact opposite of Russel Crowe… I really dislike Russell Crowe.

Maid Marian –Kate Winslet.

Cate Blanchett is an amazing actress, I’m not disputing this however, I don’t feel she is the right person to play Maid Marian. In my head Maid Marion needs to be played by somebody a little younger and for lack of a better phrase grittier. Now you may not think Kate Winslet is gritty but compared to the very regal Blanchett she seems a little more down to earth and better suited to the character in my opinion.

Little John – Rory McCann.

I mean Kevin Durand was fine I guess. He just didn’t really do much and he was another character that suffered form a dodgy accent throughout. In my film he will be British so no dodgy accents there and he will also be played by none other than The Hound himself as I feel this character would be similar to the hound in the sense that he is abrasive but ultimately a good character in his own way.

Friar Tuck – Mark Addy.

I am not changing Mark Addy as Friar Tuck cause I love Mark Addy. He was great in Trollied and Game of Thrones. He could make for some great comic relief moments without turning the film into a farce. He was humorous in Game of Thrones despite having a serious character and this is why he will stay as Friar tuck in my version of Robin Hood. i understand this section is about changing the cast however i felt special mention should go to Addy who deserved more screen time.

Sheriff of Nottingham – Mads Mikkelsen.

The main villain of my version of the film the Sheriff of Nottingham needs to have a real menacing weight to him. So having Mads Mikkelsen looming throughout the film would be a great way to make our villain stand out. Mikkelsen has put in a number of great performances as villains in the past and although his stock was not as high in 2010 I still feel he is a great fit for this role.

Everybody else would remain largely unchanged. But now we move on to the most glaring issue…

CHARACTER:

Robin Hood – As I have already said I was not happy with the characterization of Robin Hood in the 2010 film. he is an unlikable, self serving deserter for much of the film which I feel spits in the face of the charming man of the people character he is known as. I can see where Scott was coming from as we need Hood to grow in this film, otherwise what is the point? But there are better ways in which to do this. I would have Hood be the son of a nobleman instead of impersonating one, and he would still be a soldier at the beginning but he would be well liked among his peers.

He would be an ignorant character at the start that grows by seeing the situations of those around him and how his home is being affected. This will spark the change in him as opposed to being guilted into action for fear of being outed. These changes will make the lead more likable but still give him room to grow.

Maid Marian – Not a bitter widow. Maid Marian is supposed to be a foil to Robin Hood and although a clash between leads is important, that doesn’t mean we have to hate Marian either. I would have Maid Marian be a character closer to her original iteration which was a sheep herder. She would be a more common character as opposed to a noble and she would be Hood’s first exposure to the injustices at home. she would represent an different side of society and i feel placing her here may give more urgency in the film.

Prince John – This character will be removed from the film, mentioned only in passing, if you want a prequel, don’t throw all the characters at the screen, or more specifically the main villain of the series. As such we will also be getting rid of Will Scarlett and Richard the Lionheart, he again will only be mentioned in passing. This leaves room for characters in the sequels (if they ever happen.)

Sir Godfrey – Lets make Sir Godfrey a more present threat. Instead Prince John’s henchman lets make him the leader of the Sheriff’s forces in Nottingham while the sheriff governs. Also lets rename him Guy of Gisborne to bring in some favorite characters.

With character sorted I will now move on to my final key issue.

THE FRENCH ASPECT:

I feel like bringing in a foreign threat is lazy, although it is teased throughout the entire movie and the original stories feature the king away at war, I feel like it is an easy way to get our heroes on the same side and entirely unneeded. I understand they were trying to parallel history but it isn’t needed as Robin Hood wasn’t a war hero he was an outlaw famed for hiding in the woods and stealing from people. So we need to get there instead of wasting time on a battle with the French as such I will completely erase this aspect from my version of the film and focus on Robin Hood, as it is a Robin Hood film.

With the main issues addressed lets see how my changes would impact the story in the new plot summary.

THE NEW PLOT:

The film opens in an army camp the night before a battle, it is here we are introduced to a naive Robin of Locksley. He drinks and makes merry with his fellow soldiers in preparation for the coming battle, he is approached by one of his men who is nervous but Robin reassures him that everything will be OK if he follows his lead.

The next day Robin and a group of fellow archers are stood atop a hill as a fight rages below in the fields. Robin is atop a horse firing arrows along with his men when the front line is broken and he is forced into battle. He hesitates at first but eventually rides in. As he draws close; his horse is killed sending Robin crashing to the ground. Struggling to his feet he grabs his bow and runs into the fray. He shoots down two soldiers approaching on one of his men and then helps the man to his feet. This would play out similar to a Hawkeye fight scene in the Avengers films, a lot of fun arrow work from Robin.

At this point he sees a number of soldiers drawing close he then sheathes his bow and grabs his sword before charging in to fight. He is visibly uncomfortable with a sword but does his best. He turns to strike somebody but is met with an arrow through the leg from across the battlefield, he falls to his knee and is stabbed through the shoulder with a sword. His men suddenly approach and rescue him but not before he falls unconscious on the field. A number of his men carry him off the field into a position of cover while the battle rages on.

Later on he awakens being tended to by a doctor. The wounds were not fatal but Robin is in no position to fight anymore and as the son of noble, they send him home much to his own dismay. He asks to speak to the king but the Doctor responds that it was the king that made the call due to his bond with Robin’s father.At this point Robin resigns to his fate and is sent home to England.

Upon arriving home he is greeted warmly by his father who comments on the injuries leaving Robin in a state of sorrow. From here life continues as normal for a few days with Robin trying to rehabilitate himself and his father worrying about the state of his household as he is an old man and his only son is now a cripple.

After a few days pass, the household receives a visitor in the form of a collector. He is collecting money for the war efforts, something Robin supports, however he sees the unwillingness of his father to cooperate. When the collector leaves, Robin asks why his father refuses to pay which is when his father begins to explain that the Sheriff of Nottingham has taken control of the families lands at the request of Prince John and the sheriff is abusing his power making decrees and taking more than is fair. Robin’s father comments on how many of the house servants were taken along with much of their food and it is only worse for the people in the towns especially with the bandits around.

Robin decides to go and talk with the sheriff as a soldier and ally of the king hoping he can convince him to ease up on the taxation assuming that the problem is a minor one. On his journey to see the sheriff he is ignorant of the people around him and the suffering in the town. When he arrives to the sheriff’s base he is greeted warmly and put at ease by the sheriff but as the conversation continues Robin sees that the man is condescending and self important. He can see Guy of Gisborne standing nearby watching him closely. Robin then asks about the situation with money and the sheriff simply responds he is doing what he needs to for the war effort. Robin looks around to see a wealth of evidence that the sheriff is clearly using the supplies to confirm his hold on the area. He comments on this to which the sheriff responds “I’d be careful about who you throw accusations at” and reminds Robin that his family has no power. Robin responds saying Prince John is no king and has no right to take his father’s lands away. he is immediately struck from behind by Guy at this point and he falls to the ground. Guy kicks his walking stick away and the sheriff drops down in front of Robin and warns him again. He says that when he returns to the town he expects to see Robin aiding Guy in whichever ways he requests. the sheriff then takes his leave as he has to prepare for a trip to London.

From here Robin is sent on his way beaten and ashamed at his lack of ability to defend himself. on his journey his luck only sours further when he is stopped in the middle of the forest by a group of bandits that refer to themselves as the Merry Men. Robin explains that he has nothing but they aren’t convinced as they are aware of his nobility due to the way he is dressed. they steal his clothes leaving him without a shirt to make his way home. upon arriving home he breaks down in front of his father asking what happened to his home.

Weeks go by and Robin does not make any sort of effort to rehabilitate himself, he struggles to get around and has become reclusive. This is when Maid Marian is introduced. a simple townswoman rushes into Robin’s home shouting for help. When Robin makes his way to the door he asks why she has entered his home but she explains that Robin’s father is in town and Guy is beating him. Robin rushes to the best of his ability to meet in the town but is too late and arrives to see his father beaten and bloody on the floor. Guy remarks that “The cripple has come to save the old man” and his men laugh. Robin grows angry but does not act knowing there is nothing he can do. Marian then responds that the Sheriff’s tyranny cannot last. Guy remarks that Taxation is the only way for the war to get the resources it needs and those that seek to insight anarchy will be treated as enemies of the crown. Guy takes his leave and Robin watches as his father dies in his arms. His sorrow from before now turns to rage.

Marian helps Robin back to his home as some towns people carry his father’s body for him.When they arrive back at the manor Marian asks what Robin plans to do to which he responds that he plans to kill Guy. Marian retorts saying that killing Guy will accomplish nothing, he needs to take back power, and return the livelihoods to the people. Robin has no interest and Marian takes her leave, disgusted by his attitude. From here on, Robin begins training again to rehab his body and use a bow. he struggles to knock an arrow as the sword that went through his shoulder causes him serious pain.

Meanwhile we see Marian trying her best provide what little help she can to the townspeople as their supplies are being taken to aid the war leaving them with nothing. she endeavors for people to help her but she cannot convince people to stand against Guy after what happened to Robin’s father.

Robin eventually rehabs but cannot fire an arrow as well as he used to, he no longer hits bulleyes and is visibly angered by this fact. He heads off in search of Guy before being stopped the Merry Men once more. Little John asks for more supplies but this time Robin is ready to put up a fight, he strikes Little John in the face and the Merry Men form a ring as the two begin to fist fight. Robin then swings his bow cracking John in the side of the head simply angering him. John then grabs his own weapon, a long quarterstaff and the fight intensifies. Robin finds himself on the back foot before falling to his knees having been bested once more. John asks for supplies again to which Robin shout that he didn’t ring anything with him as he was trying to go and kill guy.John smiles in response to this and gets his Merry Men to bring Robin with him.

Little John explains that Guy is not the real problem in Sherwood, it’s the sheriff. Robin says he doesn’t care, the sheriff didn’t kill his father. Little John apologizes for Robin’s poor fortune but explains that Guy is just a soldier. This prompts Robin to ask about the Merry Men. He asks why they are stealing from people if everyone is struggling. Little John cannot answer which leads Robin to say “You can’t complain about the problem if you’re not willing to be part of the solution.”

Little john retorts “and you think killing Guy of Gisborne is a solution? They’ll just send more soldiers”

Robin still angry with the situation responds “What do you suggest i do?”

Little John and the Merry Men then arrive at their destination, a small town hidden in the forest that is housing the families of the merry men. Little John tell Robin to escape and find a new home. He says it is working for the merry men but robin asks if it works for everyone else, referring to the people in town. He decides to take his leave and little john asks robin to keep their secret. with Robin gone one of the Merry Men asks why Little John brought him if they were just going to let him leave. John says that he was trying to save Robin even if Robin wasn’t willing to save himself.

Back in town we see Marian attempting to gather a local group of people together in order to help the poor, the is seen speaking with Friar Tuck a simple man working as part of the clergy doing his best to support the townspeople. It is at this point the Robin enters the town and is stopped by Marian who requests help again. Robin responds that he is going to help by killing Guy. she begs him not to as it will only make things worse, as they are speaking soldiers ride into town demanding more supplies. Marian refuses and is grabbed by one of the guards. Robin quickly attacks the man and another fist fight ensues. he beats one of the soldiers down commenting that it’s not so easy when he’s not an old man. other soldiers rush to their comrades aid and robin fights them off but he is ultimately pinned to a wall by two men while the third climbs back to his feet. Marian strikes one over the head with a nearby piece of wood and friar tuck strikes a man down using his own weapon.

The others then flee leaving the three to deal with the consequences. Robin thanks the two for their help and they thank him in return before Friar Tuck starts to panic as the soldiers will now be looking for him and Marian. Marian says they will deal with it when that problem arises but Robin has another idea seeking to find the Merry Men to provide the runaways with shelter. On the walk back they are stopped yet again by the Merry Men. John comments that they need to “stop meeting like this” and Robin asks for the men to provide shelter for Marian and Tuck to which Little John responds he will if Robin helps them with a robbery. He tells robin that a large shipment of goods is set to come through the forest soon and it could do a world of good for their small community. Marian comments that those supplies could help the towns nearby and Robin agrees to help on the condition that some of the supplies are divided among the towns. Little John agrees saying he is a fair man.

The next few days are spent preparing for the robbery. Little John shares his plan with Robin indicating that they know a tavern on the road that the group frequents. and this is where they plan on ambushing the men to take the supplies. During this time we also see Marian and Robin bonding in the hideout. When the day of the robbery comes Robin is told to wait in the tavern and keep the men their when they arrive. Robin agrees and when he arrives at the tavern he listens into their conversation, hearing that the supplies are for the Sheriff. When they declare their intent to leave he sits with them and tries to convince them to stay for one more drink, they grow suspicious and try to leave prompting Robin to draw his bow on them and ask them to stay once more. The men comment that one man with a bow won’t be able to take all of them. This is when Little John enters the tavern and starts to fight the men. The rest of the Merry Men then steal away with the supplies while they fight off the men. Little John and Robin hood work very well together and soon make their way back to the camp to meet up with the Merry Men. Robin forgets about his troubles for a moment as he thinks about the Merry Men and how working with them reminded him of his time fighting for England.

Whilst at the camp the group divides all the supplies and Marian heads one of the groups taking packages to the nearby towns. She tells Robin to pay them a visit in a few days and he agrees. with the packages sent out Little John sits Robin down and the two have a conversation about how it felt helping the “little people”. They reach the conclusion that Robin will stay if they continue to help people. Friar Tuck decides that he will stay at the camps as he fears for his safety but he agrees to help the Merry Men in whichever way he can.

Meanwhile, news of the robbery is reaching the Sheriff of Nottingham and he is furious. He comments that killing Locksley was a stupid thing to as everything seems to have fallen apart since then. He asks if anything is known about the thieves but there is no information other than one being an archer and another being a giant of a man. The Sheriff tells Guy to head into town as they need to send a message regarding the thieves. Guy obliges and takes his leave while the Sheriff stews in his anger. There will be a number of scenes like this peppered throughout to keep the sheriff and guy ever present.

Despite agreeing to help the Merry Men going forward Robin feels that he needs to head home to gather his thoughts and say goodbye to his father’s body. Little John understands and lets him leave. Upon arriving home Robin finds his home up in flames and burning to the ground. He watches as he loses his home before he spots a few soldiers closing around him. They mention how a message needed to be sent to anyone willing to stand against the sheriff and that how Robin wasn’t the only one. Robin panics for Marian’s safety but is blocked by the soldiers. He fire an arrow into the eye of one of them before striking another with his bow and stabbing the third with a knife. After quickly dispatching of the men he rushes back for help.

Returning to the merry men he explains the situation and they immediately saddle up and head towards the Sheriff’s hold. Riding through Marian’s town we see that it has been sacked, the supplies taken back and Marian has been taken with them. The ride to the hold grows more desperate before they finally arrive. The sheriff is waiting but the merry men soon manage to fight their way inside. with the doors to the hold broken ope the fight floods into the sheriffs courtyard and he is forced to flee. Robin gives chase before seeing Guy with Marian restrained across the way. He quickly fires off an arrow towards the sheriff hitting him in the side before turning his attentions to Marian and Guy. Robin fires another arrow forcing Guy to break his hold and he and Robin then begin to fight.

Robin and guy fight with guy getting the upper hand multiple times however robin outsmarts him managing to disarm him before losing his own sword. The fight then devolves into a fistfight and Robin finds himself losing again. Marian strikes Guy from behind and is then quickly thrown to the ground. Guy starts to kick Marian and Robin tackles Guy off the edge of a wall sending them both down to the ground below Guys rolls away from Robin and struggles back to his feet. He grabs one of his men and takes a crossbow from him taking aim at Robin. Marian throws a bow to Robin who knocks an arrow. Guy releases a crossbow bolt and Robin panics and quickly adjusts his aim. He focuses in an effort to fire off the right shot and despite the pain in his shoulder he knocks the blot out of the air with his own arrow. shocking Guy Marian and other people watching. He immediately knocks another arrow and fires it through the chest of Guy killing him before collapsing himself.

In the aftermath of the battle we discover that the sheriff managed to escape to London but he will be back and will be more prepared for the Merry Men. Robin now has to join the Merry Men and head into hiding to save himself. he asks Marian to come with him but she denies claiming a responsibility for the people of the towns. Robin vows the Merry men will protect them and provide for them before running off into the forest to start his legend.

End.

So that’s how i would have made the Robin Hood film, it ended up diverging from the original more than i had planed but i did keep the final battle, the return from war and the prequel aspects. I feel that this version of events, although not matching up with history, is still grounded (save for the arrow moments) and provides a version of Robin people can get behind.

In my summary there are still aspects i missed like a substory in which Robin struggles to regain his skills with a bow this was mentioned briefly in my summary but it would crop through the film if things went my way. Hopefully you liked my version of events but if you didn’t how would you have fixing the 2010 Robin Hood? Let me know. Peg out.