Congratulations! Becoming a parent has been so rewarding and incredible. There have been definite ups and downs. Charlotte Jane pushes me to my limits daily, but I could not imagine my life without her! There. All the mushy stuff is out of the way. There are really great things about having a baby. I actually really miss being pregnant and feeling those baby feet kicks and finding out the gender. I miss those amazingly long newborn naps. People love to give you advice, but it’s always the same. Sleep when the baby sleeps. Wash your hands a lot. Ask for help if you need it. Don’t shake the baby. CHERISH EVERY MOMENT. Y’all, I did not cherish not knowing what the heck to do when my tiny baby was crying even though I did everything I could think of. I did not cherish the vomit and gas and stressing myself out breastfeeding and pumping. It’s ok to feel sad and overwhelmed and not completely in love with parenthood at first.

I’d like to share with you some advice I think is important that no one told me.

When you’re pregnant near the end and you’re a planet, your ankles may swell up like cantaloupes. Also, there’s a good chance you’ll pee a little when you sneeze, cough, laugh, or just trying to move in any way.

Exercise. Even if you just walk a little every day. Pushing is ridiculously tiring.

Everyone is going to want to come visit you in the hospital. It is ok to kick them out of your room. You’re going to need all the naps and relaxation you can get. Plus, germs + newborn is not the best combo.

Breastfeeding hurts at first. It’s the most natural thing in the world and you think it’s gonna go so smoothly, but it’s hard work. Your nipples will crack and bleed and when your baby is hungry you will cringe and cry and want to give up. Lasinoh nipple cream was so so helpful in healing my war zone nipples. If you can make it past the first 2 weeks, it gets better! If you don’t continue, that’s ok! You have to do what’s best for you and your little nugget of joy. A well taken care of Mama is what’s best for the baby. Whether you breastfeed or not, you may want to buy some breast pads to put in your bra. You’re gonna leak.

If you give birth vaginally, your vagina is going to be unrecognizable for a little bit. They might have to stitch your lady garden up after you squeeze that watermelon out of it. You’re going to bleed for 6 weeks or more. It’s gonna smell and it’s gonna suck. The doctor will tell you not to have sex for the first 6 weeks and you will laugh because the thought of putting anything in there any time soon will make you want to wear a chastity belt. BRING YOUR OWN PADS TO THE HOSPITAL. They will provide you with some, but they don’t stick to your underpants so what’s the point? I also recommend Depends. They are hella comfy.

Oh yeah. Guess what. After the kid comes out, they gotta get the placenta out, too. I’m not even kidding, that was worse than giving birth. They push on your belly like they’re squeezing out that last little bit of toothpaste. Mine ripped and they had to scrape their hand around and get all of it out like I was Jack O Latern. I’m cringing just typing this.

People warned me I might poop while pushing. Nobody warned me that I might poop while taking a nap after getting my epidural.

Speaking of which, stock up on Colace. Just imagine that first dump you take after birthing a baby.

The first few days after bringing baby home is going to be a blur. Someone may stay with you to help the first few days. You will think “Hey this parenting thing is no big deal!” Then they will leave and you will realize how very wrong you were. There will be naps. There will be tears (both from baby and you). You’re going to worry that even though you read all the books and articles, you still don’t know what you’re doing. And that’s ok. Because you don’t. You will be amazed at how soon you’ll get your own little routine down. You’ll be amazed at how soon you start to recognize what each cry means. Take all of the pictures. Do all of the cheesy baby things. Get to know that baby and cherish it and stuff.

The first few weeks people will txt you and ask if they can come see you. They’ll ask if you need anything. After a few weeks, that may stop. Charlie is 6 months old and it’s cold outside. People have the flu. It would be nice if someone still occasionally texted and said “Hey yall good? Can I bring you anything?” Mamas, I will be that person for you. I will gladly stop by and grab your debit card and grocery shop or run to the liquor store for you.

Sometimes you don’t fall in love with that screaming little baby covered in guts and stuff right away. That’s ok. To be completely honest, it took about 2 months before I could really enjoy my baby. Everything is so overwhelming at first. You’re nervous, you’re scared, you may have Post Partum Depression. I remember after they cleaned me and Charlie up, they needed to put me in another room. Steven suggested we stop by the nursery to see the baby, and I didn’t want to. That made me feel like the worst mother in the world. What kind of mother is so selfish that she’d rather sleep than see her baby that’s been cooking for 9 months? It happens. I was only in labor for about 8 hours, but it was exhausting. I pushed for 2 hours. I had never been so exhausted, deep in my bones. You gotta take care of yourself, too, moms.

In conclusion, pack your hospital bag.

Bathroom stuff (Hair brush, tooth brush etc)

Colace

Phone charger

Outfits for baby

Comfy pjs

Nipple cream

Boppy pillow if breastfeeding (Your back will thank you)

ABSORBENT PADS. DEPENDS. WIPES