Just days after revealing on social media that they are an item, professional wrestling lovebirds Alberto Del Rio and Paige confessed today they are already planning a chaotic catastrophe of a wedding in a WWE ring.

“We’re so in love, we can’t wait to tie the knot in a ceremony that quickly devolves violence, broken tables, and teary-eyed screaming,” tweeted Paige.

Spotted holding hands and kissing this week at an amusement park, Paige and Del Rio have the makings of a perfect WWE matrimonial trainwreck: a significant age gap between them, different ethnic backgrounds, and a shared penchant for tantrums.

“We’ve already chosen the wedding officiant,” said Del Rio. “It’ll be Eric Bischoff disguised as an old man for some reason.”

Hoping to combine the most memorable elements of past WWE weddings, Del Rio and Paige say their nuptials will involve a drugging, a miscarriage, a punted baby, Billy and Chuck as flower boys, and a live sex celebration.