We’re nearing the end of college graduation season, but there is still time, while memories are fresh, to fill out your scorecard. The idea comes from Tim Amyx, who attended a ceremony at San Francisco State University and created a scorecard below for family and friends. I have edited a bit and added a few terms, and I encourage commenters to add more.

You can create a political correctness index for every commencement speaker, based on the key words you will, and will not, expect to hear. Add one point for each item in the left column you hear, and subtract one if you happen to hear any from the right-hand column.