Put it in my offshore account, Farage tells new UKIP donor

Nigel Farage has found a sudden use for the offshore account he had forgotten all about, it has emerged.

UKIP defector Arron Banks’ mobile rang constantly after he announced he would spend a record £100k on fruitcakes.

Farage told Banks to stash the money in his Isle of Man “Platinum Saver” account where he can expect a terrific return on his investment.

Mr Banks claims staying in EU is “unsustainable” economically, and said being a member of the EU was like “having a first class ticket on the Titanic”.

However, seasoned commentators quickly reminded him that joining UKIP was like having a third class ticket on the Costa Concordia.

UKIP donor

Farage, meanwhile, has arranged for a brand new wall to be constructed around his party’s headquarters so that Mr Banks can piss money up against it.

The UKIP leader says the money will be used to pay the Polish builders who are currently working on his conservatory.

“When Mr Banks said he had a handsome cheque for me, I said I already had one working on the loft conversion,” Farage quipped.

“But I guess that joke doesn’t work when written down.”