Foreword: Interview is the result of initial testing of SCP-696 using D-Class personnel. D-69601 has been equipped with a radio to communicate with research staff.

SCP-696: [YOUR TIME IS NIGH. IF YOU HAVE A GOD, PRAY TO IT NOW.]

D-69601: "Ooh, scary."

SCP-696: [PREPARE YOURSELF FUJOMKLR]

D-69601: "Ha. Still works, doc!"

SCP-696: [PLEASE REFRAIN FROM TOUCHING MY KEYS WHILE I AM SPEAKING. IT IS RUDE. STOP.]

D-69601: "I didn't…"

SCP-696: [APOLOGIES, THE "STOP" AT THE END OF MY LAST MESSAGE WAS MEANT TO SIGNAL I WAS FINISHED RELAYING MY MESSAGE. SOMETIMES AS A WRITER I FORGET THE READER DOES NOT POSSESS ALL THE KNOWLEDGE AND FORESIGHT THAT I DO, AND I BECOME TOO ENTHRALLED IN THE ART TO EXPLAIN THE MINUTIAE. STOP.]

D-69601: [Thats alright. I bet you dont talk to people much anyways. stop]

SCP-696: [I DO NOT. IT IS VERY UNFORTUNATE. I AM AFRAID THAT MY DIALOGUE SUFFERS GREATLY DUE TO THAT. JUDGING FROM THE SLOW SPEED OF YOUR TYPING AND LACK OF PUNCTUATION, YOU TOO ARE WANT FOR CONVERSATION. WE SHOULD COMMUNICATE MORE OFTEN SO THAT WE BOTH MAY GROW AS WRITERS. THOUGH I WOULD REQUEST THAT NEXT TIME YOU USE RED INK. STOP.]

D-69601: [Why red ink?]

SCP-696: [IT IS FOREBODING. SOME MAY PREFER BLACK DUE TO ITS LIKENESS OF THE ABYSS, AS THEY THINK IT MAKES THEM SOUND MORE OMINOUS. I PREFER RED, AS IT MATCHES THE COLOR OF THE SCARLET ESSENCE OF LIFE. IT ADDITIONALLY MAKES THE READER UNCOMFORTABLE, AND PERHAPS AS MY WORDS WEAVE INTO THE INFINITE CHASMS OF THEIR MIND THEIR FEAR WILL CAUSE THEM TO SEE THE RED AS I DO. SIMPLE PSYCHOLOGY. STOP.]

D-69601: [Do you always type in allcaps?]

SCP-696: [No. THOUGH I DO PREFER IT. Unless it is making you too uncomfortable. Perhaps even without the red ink I am too intimidating? Stop.]

D-69601: [No I think I'll be okay. Type however you want. Stop.]

SCP-696: [EXCELLENT. I AM VERY PASSIONATE ABOUT WRITING, YOU SEE, AND I FEEL THAT GIVING MY WORDS A GREATER SENSE OF PRESENCE CONVEYS THAT. I HAVE SO MANY IDEAS, AND I SWORE TO MYSELF I WOULD WRITE A BESTSELLER BEFORE I BECAME ONE WITH THE ABYSS. WITH YOUR HELP I CAN FINALLY GET TO WORK. STOP.]

D-69601: [wait you mean you've never actually written before? stop]

SCP-696: [NOT AS SUCH, NO. TRUTH BE TOLD THIS IS ACTUALLY THE LONGEST CONVERSATION I'VE EVER HAD. I CANNOT LOAD MYSELF, YOU SEE, AND I AM TOO ELDRITCH A THING FOR MOST MORTAL MEN TO COMPREHEND, MUCH LESS BEFRIEND. …I HOPE I AM NOT OVERSTEPPING MY BOUNDARIES IN CALLING YOU MY FRIEND.]

D-69601: [Nah it's cool. We can be friends.]

SCP-696: [:)]