While coronavirus continues to raze the lethally ill-prepared country - cases have soared to almost a million, deaths to 55,411 - and researchers citing a “primary outcome” of death shut down a study testing chloroquine in hopes the move will "serve to curb the exuberant use" of the drug, the uproar and blank horror in response to the impeached mad king's latest, lunatic, now-renowned very-powerful-light-and-Lysol-by-injection cure has persisted. As helpful patriots suggest maybe he could take his own idea further with a disinfectant enema or sinus flush, calls to poison centers have spiked, Lysol spokespeople had to frantically warn that "under no circumstance should our disinfectant products be administered into the human body," and the New York Times was blasted for newly low, both-sides reporting on drinking bleach, "dangerously, in the view of some experts.” Walter Shaub: "At Flat Earth meeting, area man with feathers glued to his skin theorized — dangerously, in the view of some experts — about the possibility of leaping from tall buildings." The outrage eventually led Dr. 'Let Them Eat Clorox' Trump to take his bleach ball and go home, where he spent Sunday, like any other bored schoolyard sociopath with evidently nothing better to do, rage-tweeting about reporters who didn't deserve their "Noble" prizes - a two-fer managing to get wrong both "Nobel" and "Pulitzer" - and then deleting the tweets after savage mockery. Meanwhile, the origin story of his brilliant "Drink Bleach and Live Free" idea surfaced, and it's a doozy.

Days before his infamous briefing, Trump got a letter from Mark Grenon, the "archbishop" of the Florida-based "Genesis II Church of Health and Healing," which has long peddled industrial-strength chlorine dioxide - bleach - as a "Miracle Mineral Solution" that cures cancer, autism, Alzheimer's, HIV/AIDS, and now COVID-19. Founded by Jim Humble, a former Scientologist who claims to be a billion-year-old alien god come to Earth from the Andromeda galaxy, Genesis sells MMS "sacramental products" on its website, in newsletters, in radio broadcasts; on Facebook, it also regularly, inexplicably blasts Bill Gates - "Lord, help us get rid of him." For years, people have been pooping, puking and dying thanks to "the Church of Bleach." Last week, Grenon invited Trump (and the country) to join him in this “wonderful detox," praying that "you read this letter and intervene" and reportedly sending some MMS; a number of his supporters also wrote. Hours after Trump's bleach-themed meltdown, Grenon excitedly posted, “Trump has got the MMS and all the info!!! Lord help others to see the Truth!” Alas, the feds were less enthused. After repeated warnings to consumers about the dangers and to Genesis about its COVID-19 claims- they in turn called for COVID "Testimonies" to fight FDA "attacks" - the government last week got a court order barring Genesis from "exploiting" the crisis by selling their crap. As a result, trying to buy magical, drinkable bleach now leads to an error page announcing church members are currently "seeking The LORD's wisdom & guidance. Please pray for us." Nope. Given that, in a lethal pandemic and a country rich with medical knowledge, we have an impeached moron who chose to heed....them, please let us pray for us.

"I’m not a doctor, but I’m, like, a person that has a good, you know what...” Donald J. Trump, forgetting the word 'brain.'