DISCLAIMER: This recipe will make ACTUAL alcohol so you need to be 21 to brew and drink it. I am not responsible for any impending arrows to the knee you take due to overindulgence. Brew and enjoy at your own risk.

Ah, Honningbrew Meadery. I remember my first play through of Skyrim that fateful November morning when, upon escaping Helgen in an intense prologue to the first “OMG, REAL DRAGONS!” Elderscroll game, I ran into this idyllic little meadery southeast of Whiterun. I ventured in, hoping for a rousing tour of the intricate mazer world Elderscroll artists and writers had created only to have my dreams dashed by this asshole.

Now, newcomers to the game take note, where this is an asshole there is probably a mission at some point to get you some poetic justice and Sabjorn Von RodupHisAss is no exception to this rule. But can you really blame the guy? Tables filled with food and no customers? Backstabbing Black-Briars breathing down his neck? Crazy rat eating Gandalf living in his basement? I mean the guy sleeps with Black-Briars mead under his bed in an attempt to, at least in my head canon, sooth the screaming voices coming from his basement with the sweet taste of self-punishment.

But I digress.

Honningbrew Meadery actually does offer a lot of fascinating foodie secrets just by browsing around. A few things are made clear about how the mead is made: it is barrel aged, noted by the number of barrels laying around, it is presumably a sweet or dessert mead, noted by the fact that the main accompanying foods laid out are honey treats, broiled tarts, and soft cheeses and the main ingredients are honey, mentioned by Sabjorn who scoffs at Goldenglow Estates’ Honey, and green apples, found in most of the sacks and barrels in the meadery.

So from this information I started planning out a recipe for re-creating Honningbrew Mead using modern, affordable technology and ingredients available to non-Skyrim dwellers. What I came up with was essentially an apple cyser, or mead made with both fruit juices and apple and a good deal of honey. Since honey plays a large role not only in meads in general, but the storylines of the meaderies in the game I wanted to make sure that the honey was a main contributor to the composition of the brew.

If you are not familiar with brewing mead, I recommend homebrewtalk.com and reddit.com/r/mead for more information. And as always, feel free to comment below for troubleshooting help. This batch makes 5 gallons or about 14-16 750 ml wine bottles. The recipe can be divided for smaller 1 or 3 gallon batches, just be sure to use an appropriately sized primary and secondary vessel.

Honningbrew Mead

Ingredients

5 gallons 100% apple juice (find one with no preservatives other than vitamin C or your yeast will die)

10 lbs honey (canon calls for “the best honey”, none of that “Goldenglow Estates’ swill” I recommend a 100% pure honey from a local beekeeper or farmer’s market

3 large green apples (non-sprayed or washed thoroughly)

1 packet of Lalvin EC-1118 wine yeast

1/4 c. warm water (about 100 degrees F)

1 t. white sugar

5 cloves slightly pressed or kneaded

Special Equipment

5 gallon glass carboy (for smaller batches use glass milk jugs or deijohns and a 3 gallon carboy)

2nd carboy or fermenting bucket

4″ food grade hose

whisk or large spoon

san-star or 5% bleach solution

bung with hold drilled in it that fits your glass jug

airlock

1 shot of vodka

large stockpot

Sanitize all equipment including utensils, pots, airlocks and bung in 5% bleach solution or san-star. This can be most easily done in your bathtub. Rinse everything thoroughly with warm water and let air dry.

In a large stock pot over medium heat dissolve honey into 1 gallon of apple juice. Do not boil. Once dissolved (about twenty minutes) remove from heat and pour into sanitized carboy. Add cloves and apples sliced thinly. Add remaining 4 gallons of juice or until it reaches about two inches below the neck of your jug. Cap carboy to keep bugs and debris out of it.

In a small bowl mix packet of yeast, warm water (not hot or it will damage the yeast) and sugar. Place bowl into another bowl filled with hot water to keep your yeast mix warm or in a warm place such as on top of the fridge. Wait about fifteen minutes or until bubbles appear indicating your yeast has been activated.

Swirl or shake capped carboy for at least 60 seconds to aerate. You want to mixture to be bubbly to allow yeast to thrive. Once mixture is aerated, add yeast. Do not shake once yeast is added or you will cause your mead to have an odd taste. Install bung and airlock add part of the shot of vodka to the airlock to keep the inside sterile and drink the rest of the shot. You deserve it.

Put carboy in a cool, dark place for three weeks or until it bubbles less than once per minute.

Once fermentation ceases, siphon mead from the carboy leaving behind the milky sediment on the bottom. This is best achieved using a food grade hose and setting the carboy about three feet higher up than the secondary carboy or container and sucking on one end of the hose while you or a helper holds the other end in the mead about 1.5″ above the sediment layer on bottom. If you bump or rattle the sediment allow to settle before continuing. Once liquid is in the hose pinch it, drop it into the bucket or carboy you are about to fill and let it lose.

After all the mead is siphoned. Install an airlock on the second vessel and allow to clarify (this may take several weeks or months). Check the level of the vodka in the airlock and the brew regularly for signs of infection and to top off the liquid in the airlock. Once the mead is clear, you can siphon into bottles.

*Note: the picture in the title is not a completed mead. Do not bottle until mead is clear or sediment will form at the bottom of your beautiful bottles.*

You can use corked bottles or swing tops or even capped beer bottles. Check out Deviantart user EmptySamurai for some great inspiration for labels and prop bottling.

Allow bottles to mature for at least three months, but wait six months or more for best taste. Please drink responsibly.