Our company prides itself on our open and healthy display of emotion, even though it sometimes makes our customers uncomfortable. It's ok though, because we were also uncomfortable having to troubleshoot your grandmother's porn site. Anyway, here are some fun facts about our workplace:



- Xanax is plentifully distributed via snack bags to ensure that proper sanitation and portion control is achieved



- We keep our customer service department stocked with plenty of women, to ensure maximum display of emotion



- Our servers are specially designed to not talk back, which is instrumental in balancing our chi



- We are committed to operating a green environment. We used to go through 40 boxes of tissues per week, and to help reduce waste we opted to replace said tissues with biodegradable onion skins. It's good for the environment, and helps support our local farmers as the nonstop cycle of acid tears wears away at our souls.