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One morning, a male colleague muses, “I feel like Singaporean women tend to take on their husband’s surname after marriage if their husband is ang moh.”

The air gets sucked out of the room. Two female colleagues look at each other in shock, horror, then bemusement. Said male colleague hastily clarifies himself before he gets murdered by irate journalists.

“I mean, mine is the most boring one around: Tan. I understand why no one would want to take my surname lah.”

His assessment of his “boring” Chinese surname is, of course, in comparison to an ang moh surname, which might sound more exotic in Singapore.

With that, the whole table erupts into a spirited debate about whether it’s passé for Singaporean women to adopt their husband’s surname after marriage, regardless of how ‘unique’ it is. Even though love and tradition may be compelling reasons to change their surnames, it doesn’t feel necessary or relevant for women to formally adhere to this custom as much in this day and age.

Someone then points out that there are still people who combine Chinese and Western surnames, while another chimes in that everyone who has taken on their husband’s surname or adopted a double-barrel surname seems to have a Caucasian husband.

There is a glaring lack of mention about interracial marriages not involving Caucasian men or men with Caucasian sounding surnames.

“So what are some reasons women still change their surnames?” asks the first brave soul.

“Personal branding.”

I hear the words escape my mouth before I even register what I say. But before I can explain, I catch a few nods and wry smiles around the table; it seems I’ve said what everyone thinks but no one wants to admit.

After all, few would confess to allowing a superficial reason to guide such a monumental decision.