Friendly Fire

Definitely Deranged Supporters (DDS)





Unfortunately, part of this article is not satire. Those comments are real.

QUEZON CITY, Philippines — President Duterte's rabid online supporters commented hateful words against Duterte Youth Chairman Ronald Cardema, who claimed that Duterte should have gotten more than 20 million votes.This was after Cardema filed a letter at the Commission on Elections (COMELEC) on Tuesday to raise the concern.According to Cardema, his group found numerous violations brought by COMELEC's technology provider, Smartmatic, in the previous election.They also demanded that Smartmatic be barred from providing their service in future elections.Cardema and Duterte Youth group did not have any proof.Rodrigo Duterte already won with a landslide of 16 million votes.Online supporters who are usually tagged as trolls in the social media world opened fire against the Cardema after an apparent misunderstanding.In a screencap of news comments posted by renowned social commentary page Ignore Rants, Duterte supporters can be seen spouting hateful comments in the comments section of news sites, calling Cardema a "dilawan" and "bias"."Haha. sadyang ayaw nyo lang tanggapin na panalo si duterte," said one of the commenters, who apparently did not read the news story.Most of the commenters claimed that Cardema was "binayaran ng dilaw", referring to the Liberal Party whose main color is yellow."This has been one of the biggest instances of friendly fire in the Philippines, surpassing that of the unfortunate airstrike that hit our troops in Marawi," said Jeremy Layson, the Ignore Rants admin who was recently rejected from Harvard According to Ignore Rants' resident psychologist DOMINADOR, these people exhibit the psychological disease calledis a serious condition that has been plaguing these supporters ever since the start of the campaign period," said DOMINADOR."Symptoms of the condition includes lack of literacy, inability to read long news articles, and sudden decrease of reading comprehension."According to DOMINADOR, the root cause of the disease is subscription to fake news sites as well as reading anything from Mocha Uson's blog.Meanwhile, the Department of Health said they are willing to provide chemotherapy to people who got cancer from reading Facebook comments.