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SHARES

Today is International Women’s Day, but in the remote northeast of India it is male activists who are seeking to end gender inequalities in a society where females call the shots.

The Khasi are an ancient tribe who number over a million strong in the picturesque state of Meghalaya. Their origins have never been satisfactorily explained by historians, but they are likely descendants of Mon-Khmer speakers who migrated from East Asia – genetically, they are distinct from most other Indian populations.

The Khasis practice a matrilineal tradition which places women at the centre of their society – a concept generally at odds with the prevailing culture in this part of the world.

Khasi tribesman Keith Pariat is the chairman of Syngkhong Rympei Thymmai (SRT), an organisation which lobbies for men’s rights in Meghalaya. He said: “Go to any hospital and stand outside the maternity wards and listen. If families have a boy, you will hear things like: “oh okay, he’ll do”. But if it’s a girl then there is joy and applause.”

Mr Pariat is fighting to overhaul a Khasi tradition which has endured for thousands of years, and to overturn perceived injustices such as:

– Youngest daughters inheriting all ancestral property.

– Men being expected to move into their wives’ homes after marriage.

– Children taking their mother’s family name.

– All parents with ancestral property but no daughters being required to adopt a girl before they die, as they cannot leave the inheritance to their sons (hence the welcome for female babies).

Mr Pariat said: “When a man has to live in his mother-in-law’s house, it tends to make him a little quiet. You are just a breeding bull. No one is interested in hearing your views about anything, you have no say in any decision whatsoever.”

He believes that the matrilineal culture has been “totally detrimental” to Khasi men, saying: “It puts no responsibility on their shoulders so they tend to take life easy and they go into drugs and alcohol and that cuts their life short.”

So, while young Khasi men and women are permitted considerable freedom in their choice of partners and in premarital sexual relations, Khasi men are not an appealing marriage prospect to Khasi women who often exercise their right to marry outside the community instead. SRT member Teibor Langkhongjee explained: “Khasi men don’t have any security, they don’t own land, they don’t run the family business and, at the same time, they are almost good for nothing.”

A men’s rights movement did briefly emerge in Meghalaya in the early 1960s but was effectively suppressed by intimidation when hundreds of Khasi women turned up at one of their meetings armed with knives. SRT was founded in 1990, but has struggled to overturn Khasi tradition as India’s Constitution affirms the right of tribal councils to set their own customary laws. The Indian judiciary has been known to step in where clan rules clash with national law to the detriment of women’s rights, but men’s rights have never been debated.

Most Khasi women dismiss the suggestion that their society is biased against men and argue that, although they are empowered to make their own decisions over marriage and money, their political participation is low – women account for only 4 out of 60 state legislators in Meghalaya’s capital, Shillong.

Patricia Mukhim, editor of the Shillong Times, said: “The reason the property is left to the youngest daughter is because she has the responsibility to look after the parents until they die. Parents feel like they can always depend on their girls.”

Khasi women do, however, value the protection that the matrilineal system gives them, as misogyny is widespread in many parts of India. Sexual assaults are often dismissed as ‘eve-teasing’ and victims can sometimes be blamed for attacks. This mindset was highlighted by the horrific gang rape of a female student on a New Delhi bus in December. Pesundra Reslinkhoy, a 25-year-old nursery school teacher in Shillong said: “I think it is a good tradition for Khasi, that all the power will stay with women because it will protect us from many evil things.”

SRT has no plans to legally challenge matrilineal customs, but hopes that a campaign of influence will convince more Khasis of the need for change. However, the balance of power in Meghalaya’s tradition-bound villages is unlikely to shift anytime soon.

Ms Mukhim said: “In most of Meghalaya, people only know the old ways and they like the old ways just fine.”

Source: Asian Age