The Penn State situation has been one that has engulfed not only sporting news but the news at large. We all know the details of Jerry Sandusky former defensive coordinator of the Penn State Nittany Lions “allegedly” sexually assaulting young boys since maybe 1998. Joe Paterno and his coaching staff don’t report his suspicious behavior to the authorities and continue to allow him to use the Penn State athletic facilities even “allegedly” raping a 10-year-old boy in their showers. Joe Paterno, the Athletic Director, and President have all been rightfully canned by the Penn State trustees. The situation has become not only a media circus but there are Penn State students holding vigils and camping out around Joe Paterno’s home like they are Occupy Wall Street. The whole situation is a big cluster f*** but the biggest detail many people may not know but they are reporting that the majority of the young boys molested by Sandusky were… African- American.

Yes, the majority of the young boys sexually assaulted by Sandusky were black boys. The race of the boys in totality means nothing but in the African-American community molestation of boys isn’t really discussed and brought up. We can chalk it up to the homophobia in the black community and even the extra masculinity sometimes displayed in the culture. The black community I feel does a lot more to discuss the problem of sexual assault with young black girls being molested far more than boys. Not saying that it shouldn’t be a concern it’s just not much highlighted about black boys when it comes to sexual abuse. Just search for support groups of black boys being sexually abused and you will see what I mean. But, besides the fact we don’t address the idea of black boys being raped, molested, and sexually assaulted the glaring reason that some of these reasons happen to black boys is the absence of the father in many homes.

Not going to get into the statistical barrage of how father’s aren’t in black children’s homes because there are so many factors that are involved in that. Just think about it like this Jerry Sandusky has had a program The Second Mile since 1977. The Second Mile is a nonprofit organization for underprivileged youth, providing help for at-risk children and support for their parents in Pennsylvania. Nine times out of ten who do you think these at-risk youths were?

The reasons many black boys are molested because they are put into a situation where they look up to and trust an older man like a “father”. Sandusky was taking these boys to bowl games, getting them shoes, teaching them about football, giving the boys hope of playing football in college which could produce a pro career( think about what Biggie said “You either slang rock or have a wicked jump shot”), and just being them. Sandusky was able to fill the void of many of these boys NOT having a father in their life. He was able to use this opportunity to mold many of their minds to believe for instance that them getting oral sex from him and being penetrated was okay. He was able to take many of their impressionable mines and make them believe that he was showing them love through those dastardly acts.

Looking at the cases of Jerry Sandusky and even the Bishop Eddie Long it would be harder for men like them to take advantage of young black boys if more father’s would be in their lives. Many black boys wouldn’t have to reach out to pedophilic pastors and coaches looking for that fatherly love. Statistically black boys are given the least attention of any children of any race or gender in America….PERIOD! Black boys are socialized the least in school and then in turn in many homes. The way to combat this is by more fathers stepping up and being a father to their damn child (be it girl or boy). There would be so many pitfalls that a black boy wouldn’t be susceptible to if a dad was truly active in their lives. The duty of a father is to “protect” his family and lineage. A man has to think…What kind of man he is to allow ANY man to take advantage of his family. Honestly, I am getting pissed about our community allowing our children to grow up without having that “protection” and guidance from a father.

If you a father get in your child’s life! Not just paying child support. Be there for the child. I know your baby mama might not be s*** but you chose her crazy ass your child didn’t. So, step up and become involved in their life. You just gotta chalk up the crazy chick as something that you HAVE to get around so that your lineage will not become prey for future Eddie Longs and Jerry Sanduskys. We as men have to quit the excuses and be there for our children. We have men growing up with woman tendencies and not being able to hold their head high because they have NO men around to understand the dynamic of being a man. We teach MEN how to be MEN not women!

Then Mother’s I have talked about this before in “Just a Baby Daddy but on Father’s Day” but LET these father’s be a father to their child. Don’t let your bitterness towards this man not allow the child to see their father. Quit using the child support like an entrance fee to Country Club. If you don’t pay your dues (child support) you can’t enjoy the perks of the facility (child). Remember you chose to have that drunken night of passion with his raggedy ass back in 2005 NOT the child. As much as you think you are this independent woman that the Destiny’s Child‘s song made you feel like…YOU NEED a man to raise a boy and a man to teach a girl how a MAN should treat her.

When I was a kid I wasn’t very close to my father but I had the greatest uncle in the world that supported everything I did. My uncle was the father figured I need. I didn’t need no coach to be a father that I would need to come to about things in my life I had my uncle and I was blessed for that. I remember when I was playing soccer in the 5th grade. I was the only black boy on the team and lo and behold I was the goalie for the team. The night before the first game my uncle gave me this long speech about being a goalie, how proud he was of me, how being a black goalie was an accomplishment and what it means for me to be able to play. I crack jokes to him all the time now about how he gave me a speech damn near like I was Jackie Robinson, Jack Trice, or Willie O’Ree strutting up for my first game. But, you know what I ran out there feeling like a million bucks. Unfortunately, I gave up 8 goals in the game and we lost but nonetheless he was my motivator and teacher about being a man.

All boys need that person that will kick their ass when they are wrong but also teach them the intricacies of being a man. Even if you don’t have any boys look around you and see if there are any boys that may need you. There may be a nephew, cousin, or a local neighborhood kid that may just want someone to shed a little game on them. There was no way a Jerry Sandusky was going to be able to take advantage of me. For one Kevin Woodson would make sure that his size 10 cowboy boots would have something to say but also I didn’t need a role model because I had him.

For other opportunities to mentor shoot me an email fromashy2classy@gmail.com. I am working on compiling a list of mentorship programs that many of us brothas can get involved in.

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