Q: TriMet just replaced the bench at my North Portland bus stop with a hideous abomination. Can't sit on it. Can't put your lunch or bag on it. Only people of a very specific height can lean on it. Are these going in around town?

A: Let me guess: It looks like a torture device from "Game of Thrones," but painted blue and displaying a honking big advertisement.

With a high back and a slanted seat that’s barely a foot deep, it’s more playground slide than bench. Meet TriMet’s new “leaner,” popping up at bus stops around the city.

It’s not for sitting. It’s for leaning.

Roberta Altstadt, a TriMet spokeswoman, said the agency's traditional benches violated the Americans with Disabilities Act at many locations. They didn't allow enough room for mobility devices to pass on sidewalks.

TriMet is also installing leaners at stops that never had a bench. "They'll give riders an alternative to standing in locations where benches will not safely fit," Altstadt said.

Of course, these new commuter pews aren’t there just for comfort. There’s money to be made.

The so-called Ridership Amenity Program to install leaners or narrower, newly-designed benches at 600 TriMet stops was funded entirely by Lamar Advertising.

Currently, Lamar pays TriMet about $3.3 million a year for the right to display ads on its vehicles and at stops. In order to recoup that cost and make a profit, the agency needs advertising real estate.

So, in a way, these are really just billboards, helping Lamar -- ergo TriMet -- make some dough. Sure, there’s room on which to rest you posterior, but there's a bit more space for ads, which should make local Realtor Billy Grippo and countless personal injury attorneys happy.

TriMet is also installing new benches with a narrower design at locations where ADA rules allow them. Ram-rod straight backs, less room for your bum, but more ad space than the old benches.

The leaners aren’t really designed for you to take a load off. But look at the upside: By keeping your feet pressed against the sidewalk, you’re probably strengthening your core.

Q: I drive a lot on West Burnside, where signs prohibit left turns at pretty much every intersection. But I've notice in the past few months the number of illegal left turns increasing by motorists. I assume the restriction is based more on traffic flow efficiency than safety concerns. Why is West Burnside one of the few streets with this traffic control paradigm?

A: Back in the 1860s, when West Burnside Street was called simply "B Street," the biggest headache was the drunken sailors who stumbled in and out of saloons and card rooms. Now, you can't even take a left turn in car without risking your life or creating a traffic jam.

West Burnside isn’t just one of the city’s busiest streets, passing a transit mall, a sports stadium, a few concert venues and several bustling retail districts, it’s cramped as all get out. There’s really no room for proper turn lanes.

The left-lane restrictions have been in place since at least 1974.

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"It's primarily a way to increase traffic flow capacity because it eliminates the conflicting movement," said Peter Koonce, the Portland Bureau of Transportation's traffic signal manager. "There are some safety benefits for pedestrians and people on bicycles as well."

By prohibiting left turns at those 90-second traffic signals, Koonce said, the city likely is saving the average non-turning Burnside driver several minutes on his commute.

Using a formula based on "traffic signal cycle length and theoretical capacity" found in the Federal Highway Administration Signal Timing Manual (thick, thick transportation geek stuff), Koonce can say for a fact that allowing one driver to make to make a left would result in many drivers missing the green light entirely.



“That’s a lot of lost time,” he said.

Yeah, and suddenly, all those people running late to the Modest Mouse show at the Crystal Ballroom are mad at you because you just had to wait for a gap in oncoming traffic so that you could take your precious left.

The bottom line: It’s probably quicker – and definitely safer -- to take a right off Burnside, then a left at the next intersection and then another left onto the street you want to take to your destination.

By the way, a stretch of Southeast McLoughlin Boulevard has had its left-turn ban since the 1950s.

-- Joseph Rose