Piers Morgan is stumblebum. Yeah that’s what I said. His buffoonery has known no bounds throughout his career, and his political views are no exception. A good way to make a sound decision is to see what Piers thinks and then do the opposite. And in an editorial on Wednesday, given the choice between Ted Cruz or Donald Trump, Piers chose Trump.

React and adjust accordingly.

Yes, Piers chose Trump over Cruz, and it’s for the best reason ever. It’s really glorious to witness the ineptness of Morgan as he tries to fear monger about Cruz and only makes the case against Trump stronger. Never has the phrase “your own worst enemy” applied more to any individual than Piers Morgan.

Let’s start with his screaming, jump-scare headline: “Trump and Cruz may both sound equally crazy but the scary thing about Ted is that he actually means it.”

That really kinda sums the whole thing up right there. He likes Trump better BECAUSE Trump is a lying scumbag who doesn’t mean what he says. He fears Cruz because Cruz has the courage of his convictions. That’s awesome.

On Ted:

Cruz is not, as many believe Trump to be, just pandering to the hard-line Conservative right in America, he IS the hard-line Conservative right in America; a brutally ideological zealot who wants to drag his country kicking and screaming back to the very dark days of bigoted fear and hatred of government.

On Trump:

But Trump, at his heart, is a businessman.

He’s spent his life doing deals, often taking extreme starting positions – whether he’s buying buildings or golf courses, or haggling over a TV show salary – to secure leverage and then negotiating back to a more reasonable place.

He’s been adopting the exact same strategy in this presidential race – to great effect.

See where this is going? It’s so great. Here’s more …

On Ted:

Dershowitz, speaking to me on my old CNN show, added: ‘Ted Cruz deeply believes in what he’s doing, he’s deeply principled, he thinks he’s doing the right thing. That doesn’t mean it is the right thing, and he’s very hard to get off that principled argument. He was not a compromiser, not somebody who tried to make friends by accepting what was then the political correctness of the day.’

On Trump:

But I suspect everything he’s been saying is negotiable, from his Mexican wall to short term Muslim ban.

That’s my favorite right there. He’s arguing that Cruz does NOT bend to political correctness but Trump does. Think about it you guys. We could stop right there. Should we?

Oh okay, just a few more.

On Cruz:

He repeatedly claims that more guns mean less crime, despite all statistical evidence to the contrary. In fact, he’s so gun-mad, even by Republican standards, that he makes breakfast for his family by wrapping pieces of bacon around a machine gun.

On Trump:

The presidency is just another deal to Trump, albeit the biggest of his life.

To win the White House, he has to first win the Republican nomination, and he’s calculated that the best way to do that is to hammer away with tough-sounding messages on hot button Conservative issues like Islamic terrorism, immigration and abortion.

Ha ha, ouch!

He also adds:

Whether you love or loathe Trump, ask yourself which is the more dangerous potential leader for America right now: a ‘deeply principled’ right wing evangelist lunatic who means exactly what he says, or a pragmatic extrovert businessman with a big mouth whose whole career has been built on compromise?

Ask yourself, indeed.

But I will say that, by far, the most damning part of the article comes about 2/3 of the way through, and should prove devastating to Trump. Piers points out that he has been friends with Donald for ten years.

Trump is friends with Piers Morgan.

Disqualified.