"It's that dick from teevee!"

"It's that dick from teevee!"

“This is really about introducing him to the country,” a Romney adviser says. “It’s the largest audience he has ever had. Everybody’s watching.”

Talking about debate strategy, Mitt Romney's team let loose this laugher:Introducing him to the country? Isn't that what positive introductory bio ads are for? That's how candidates typically introduce themselves to voters!

But wait, what's that? Romney never ran any positive ads? You mean all of his ads were negative and designed to destroy his opposition, first in the primaries, and now in the general election? Oh.

I guess talking about growing up rich and powerful and entitled, then pretending he has no religion and that he was never governor of Massachusetts gave them little material to work with.

But how about the convention? Isn't that where Romney would introduce himself?

That's kind of the big point of conventions: give the candidate an hour to talk about who he is and why voters should give a shit. But of course, Romney made history by becoming the first presidential candidate to get got no real bump out of his convention. Oh well. Maybe things might've turned out differently if 1) Romney hadn't been overshadowed by that awesome Clint Eastwood spectacle, 2) if he had a compelling story to tell, and 3) if he hadn't shit on the troops by ignoring them. I mean, those are the guys that will have to die if Romney gets his pet war with Iran started.

So here he is, a month from the election, and his advisers are claiming that now, he finally has a chance to introduce himself to the country? That's not his problem, dudes.

The country knows who he is. They don't like him. They don't like how he loves to fire people. They don't like how he mocks their non-Kenneth Cole jackets. They don't like how he shits on the gourmet cookies that cute old ladies give him. They don't like how he makes $10,000 bets when they're all getting fired by the Mitt Romneys of American industry. They don't like how he dismisses 47 percent of America as a bunch of moochers. They don't like how his wife barks at people as if they're the help. They don't like how he "jokes" about crying when writing a check (from his ample treasury) to a church in which he's a bishop. They don't like how he's a jerk to his own family.

That's why his unfavorability numbers have gone up and up and up the more people get to know him:



Sure, his favorables have improved, but that's just conservatives pretending to like him. Watch that black line plummet after the election (if anyone bothers to poll him).

What this all means is that Romney is the most unpopular presidential candidate since Walter Mondale, and as far as I can tell, the most unpopular Republican candidate since they started polling these things. And that matters.

For example, note how Obama's current polling surge in Ohio came after Romney and his running mate spent three full days campaigning in the state. It's clear: The more people see Romney, the less they like him. His problem isn't that he hasn't introduced himself, it's that people have already decided he's a dick and want little to do with him.

His best strategy at this point would be to spend time at Dick Cheney's undisclosed location. Because his obnoxious smirking mug and even more obnoxious words aren't winning anyone over.