In this column about addiction, Mark Thomson writes about the role 'an attitude of gratitude' plays in recovery:



By Mark Thomson



One of the most consistent themes in recovery support groups is gratitude. As with so much in the addiction-recovery movement, this emphasis on gratitude is more than humbling. It is very practical.

Without an "attitude of gratitude, " many will relapse into their old patterns of alcohol and drug use.

In order to appreciate its importance, it is helpful to understand the process of addiction itself.

For so many years, addicts find relief from anxiety, stress and depression by using alcohol and drugs. As they begin to suffer the life problems that inevitably accompany aggressive alcohol and drug use -- loss of relationships, poor health, career stagnation or job loss, legal problems -- they accelerate their use. Sooner or later, this leads to more life problems that, in turn, trigger more aggressive use of alcohol and drugs. A classic vicious cycle has been set in motion. Alcohol and drug use lead to problems that lead to more aggressive use, which leads to more problems.

Try to imagine what it is like for addicts to reach that point in life.

Everything is going wrong, and the very thing that saw them through difficult times in the past has been revealed, not as a solution, but as the cause of their problems.

In short, their "medicine" becomes their "poison." For many in late-stage addiction, there seems to be no way out.

It should come as no surprise, then, that gratitude is in such short supply for addicts. As they consider all they have lost -- including their means of coping with these losses -- they ask, "What in the world do we have to be grateful for?"

Those who have been in recovery for some time recognize this lack of gratitude actually is resentment. And resentment is one of the most common triggers for relapses. They know that mulling over past slights, relationship and career failures and the "unfairness of life" is a recipe for relapse for those in early recovery.

For that reason, sponsors often ask addicts in early recovery to complete a "gratitude list" -- a tally of all that is good in their lives.

To the outsider, this may seem a bit contrived. After all, if the addicts don't feel grateful, why should they pretend to be? But those in recovery understand feelings are not facts, and new habits can lead to changed attitudes. And, more importantly, recovery is much more than abstaining from alcohol and drug use. It is adopting a new way of looking at life.

That is why those in recovery -- often to the amazement and bewilderment of newcomers -- express gratitude for "the gift of desperation" that led them into this new way of living.

This gift may have come in the form of a failed marriage, the loss of a job, health problems or an arrest -- things most of us would never welcome.

However, those in recovery understand as few others can that without this gift, they would never have found their way into recovery in the first place. And it was in recovery where they learned grace is available, and it surrounds us.

But in order for addicts to receive it, they need to be looking for it. They need that "attitude of gratitude" not just in on the fourth Thursday of November, but every day of their lives.

Editor's note: The professionals who write this monthly column encourage readers to submit questions about addiction and alcoholism. Send them to slovell19@comcast.net.

Mark Thomson is director of special projects at D.A. Blodgett-St. John's and serves on the Kent County Prevention Coalition, The Turning Point Advisory Council and Project Vox, an advocacy group for those in recovery.