“But, sir, you are not alive.”

I was losing it, man. She was like a computer, brainless. Or was it too brainy? Too logical for her own good? But I guess that is how Global Admin Corp likes its employees. It makes them more efficient. When all governmental administrative duties have been outsourced to your multinational, that is exactly how you need your employees to be.

They are in charge of handing out birth certificates, identity cards, marriage licenses, and every other goddamn pain-in-the-ass document you require to live a life to the world’s 10 billion citizens. Efficiency is very much required to get those 10 billion sods moving along.

“You make a good point. But my rebuttal would be that I am standing right in front of you. This would not be possible if I was, in fact, dead, would it?”

“My contention is not that you died, sir. On the contrary, you have never been born.”

Violence gets you sent to the island. Violence gets you sent to the island. Don’t get violent.

“Again, good point. Still, I am standing right in front of you. How could that be if I have never been born?”

“To be honest with you, sir, I do not know. The whole thing is a bit peculiar but you have never been issued with a birth certificate, hence, according to regulations, you have not been born. All services to you have been terminated.”

“I don’t think you understand. Without those services, which I was told is my universal right, I will lose my Global Income Share. Without that I cannot pay my rent, pay my bills, or buy food. I need those services. I need that income.”

“I understand this, sir. All we need to get is proof of your birth and we can issue you with a birth certificate. Until then, my hands are tied.”

“The proof that I was born exists in the fact that I am standing right fucking here!”

“Okay, sir, if you want to get violent, I have no problem calling the Peace Brigade over…”

The island, dude, the island.

“I am sorry. I am sorry. How can I prove that I have been born?”

“Just go to the hospital of your birth. They should have it on record. Bring those records here and we can issue you with a birth certificate and allow you to get back on your services.”

The hospital where I was born? I don’t know where I was born. I needed to find my mother. Or my father. One of them must know.

End of Part 1