On one end of the table, Ginny Weasley. On the other, Draco Malfoy. Between them, Tom Morfin Riddle – who was not permitted to participate in the discussion. Ginny and Draco were both wearing the sort of fine gloves that only Malfoy money could easily buy – though magically reinforced for durability.

"So, I am not under suspicion from the administration?" said Draco.

"Not as far as I could tell," said Ginny. "They completely bought that I was just concerned that you might also have been attacked. Now, tell me everything you've figured out. Are your memories of possession intact?"

"Mostly," said Draco. "There's one specific memory that I know I lost, but everything else is intact, as far as I can tell."

"What's the one memory you're missing?" said Ginny. "It might be a lead."

"I can't remember how the Dark Lord passed the possession test while he was in my body," said Draco. "I can remember that there was a possession test, and later the Headmistress told me I passed it, but I can't remember how I passed it. I can remember there was some trick, but not what the trick was. I should start from the beginning, though."

"Alright," said Ginny. "How and when did you get possessed?"

"Luna – who was disguised as Pansy Parkinson at the time, remember," said Draco.

"Yes," said Ginny.

"She passed the diary to me, with an enchantment on it to make it invisible, so it'd be harder to notice," said Draco. "I don't know if it possessed her at any point; given what I know I don't see any reason it would have. It must have just been part of the Confundus. Or maybe Imperius. I don't know how many mind-control magics she was under."

"This whole plot is needlessly complex," said Ginny.

"Yes," said Draco. "Anyway, since I'd already consented to indefinite possession months ago, it instantly took full control of my body."

"That's a really stupid thing to consent to," said Ginny.

"True," said Draco.

"I regret it," said Ginny.

"And I as well," said Draco. "So, I quickly gained awareness of some pieces of his plot, though some details are fuzzy. He didn't like it when you locked him back in his box. He didn't like it at all. But he had a confederate somewhere in Hogwarts - I can't remember who – who he'd arranged a plan with just for that fringe case. The plan was supposed to go into effect if enough time passed without any contact between the Dark Lord and his servant."

"I don't suppose you know who it is who's working with him?" said Ginny.

"No," said Draco. "Come to think of it, it might be related to how he passed the possession test."

"Great," said Ginny. "Absolutely great."

"Anyway, his plan, in case he wound up locked in his box with no hope of getting out, was for his servant to hunt him down, seize him, and kill you," said Draco. "He eventually wanted you killed either way, but he got especially emotional about it after he was locked in his box."

"Well, he won't be locked in much longer," said Ginny, and she smiled. Draco frowned. "Because he'll be dead."

"Oh," said Draco. "That. I wanted to talk to you about that."

"Finish what you were saying, first," said Ginny.

"The Lethifold was his plan to kill you, but he needed Luna and Hermione out of the way first," said Draco. "He was afraid Luna would figure out what was going to happen on the basis of her Divination, and protect you. Furthermore, he thought she posed a mortal threat to him on the basis of her arcane knowledge."

"A particularly well-founded fear of his," said Ginny. "As I'll get to."

"He was fairly certain," continued Draco, "that Hermione was also a potential threat to the plan, because many of her supernatural powers correlate with those of unicorns – who are uniquely able to detect and destroy Lethifolds. So she also had to go. And that explains everything that happened yesterday."

"Got it," said Ginny. "Now, to discuss our future course of action – unless you have anything else to bring up?"

"I've said everything of use I remember," said Draco. "I spent most of my time mortified about you, because I knew what was supposed to be coming and I couldn't move a muscle to stop it. I was shocked when you burst in, but more deeply, relieved."

"Glad to hear it," said Ginny. "Now, about destroying him."

"Remind me why we can't just turn it into the school?" said Draco, and Ginny sighed.

"Well, first off, I know that I'm just a twelve-year-old girl, but Voldemort convinced me to do some pretty weird things," said Ginny. "Call me crazy, but I don't entirely trust anyone else, even experienced adults who know who and what they're dealing with, not to fall to the same persuasion."

"Rhetoric can be very powerful," said Draco, "but that seems more like cynicism than rationality."

"Second off," said Ginny, "you said just now that he has an associate in the school? Do you think he's in the school administration?"

"Maybe?" said Draco.

"Then maybe it's not such a good idea to trust the school administration with disposing of him," said Ginny. "Third off, what do we have to lose by killing him ourselves? The public would have less peace of mind, if they thought he was still out and about. But that's only because of asymmetry of information. I would have more peace of mind if I saw him die myself, and rationally so. I think, given what I've said, the same applies to you. True, he has that unknown associate – but the associate works for him, not the other way around, right?"

"Right," said Draco.

"Then absent orders from the boss, the associate should be mostly harmless," said Ginny. "And nothing much bad should come from the public thinking Voldemort is still out. The attacks will slowly fade into the past; people won't be sure why they stopped but sooner or later they'll realize that there aren't any more coming. It's certainly better that the public thinks Voldemort is out while he's not than the other way around. Now, for the how."

"Alright," said Draco, playing along. "How?" Ginny revealed a scroll.

"Luna," said Ginny. "She gave me this scroll and said that it explained what Tim was and how to destroy him."

"...I need to talk to Luna more too," said Draco.

"I brushed her off at the time because, well, you know," explained Ginny, "but now I've thoroughly read it and it sounds legitimate enough. Let's review the list of horcrux destruction methods – one, invocation of a demon through ritual sacrifice of a virgin in a pentagram made of Sneakoscopes – immoral, and also it says that the demon is potentially more dangerous than the horcrux you're trying to destroy. Two, make the horcrux feel remorse, specifically for the murder required to create it. Yeah, I'm not going to play therapist for Voldemort; that is literally the worst thing we could do with him at this point. Two-A, use Amortentia to force it to experience that same remorse. Ignoring the complications of feeding a potion to an inanimate object - I guess we'd let it possess one of us, first? Sounds risky – it's incredibly difficult to get our hands on Amortentia."

"True," said Draco. "Father commented once that with all the regulations imposed on it, even he would have a hard time coming by any."

"Woah," said Ginny, "probably not going to happen. But I guess I'll put that one down as a maybe, since it doesn't come with any kind of inherent risk, if we manage to get it set up. Third, Fiendfyre. I don't know how that works? Can you make that?"

"Some of Father's old friends could," said Draco, "and some of them are even still alive, but I suspect they would ask us some very pointed questions about why we needed any, and I'm not sure how they would respond to an honest answer."

"Fourth, Dementor's Kiss," said Ginny. "We're not going to sneak into the Department of Mysteries, especially not with Voldemort sneaking in with us. We're children and that's ridiculous. Fifth, contact with another hostile horcrux. Sounds promising, but these aren't common, are they?"

"I don't believe so," said Draco.

"It only has about a fifty percent chance of working anyway," said Ginny. "Sixth, certain lost sacrificial rituals. Well, there's that word, 'lost'. Seventh, basilisk venom." Ginny and Draco started to laugh, simultaneously.

"Well, according to legend, Slytherin's Monster is helpful towards all Parselmouths who reach it," said Draco. "I'm sure it could be persuaded to bite a troublesome book." Ginny started laughing a bit too hard, which immediately concerned Draco. "I was joking." Ginny smiled wider, and Draco frowned more intensely.

"I'll put it down to consider," said Ginny.

"This is the stupidest plot I have ever been involved with," said Draco.

"Stupidest, or simplest?" said Ginny.

"I can't believe we're looking for the entrance to the Chamber of Secrets, as though it were trivial," said Draco.

"Open," said Ginny.

"Sspeak the correct wordss," said the bathroom sink.

"Open pleasse," said Ginny.

"Sspeak the correct wordss," said the bathroom sink.

"Sshow me your ssecretss," said Ginny.

"Sspeak the correct wordss," said the bathroom sink.

"Correct wordss," said Ginny.

"Sspeak the correct wordss," said the bathroom sink.

"Sspeak the correct wordss," said Ginny, and the bathroom sink blossomed into an enormous entrance to a tunnel, which occupied the entire girls' lavatory. Puzzles don't make very good passwords, and vice versa.

"I can't believe we're entering the Chamber of Secrets, as though it were trivial," said Draco, and Ginny pulled him down with her. The entire environ was much more dungeon-ish than even Harry's revised Slytherin dorms; everything was damp and dark, illuminated only by sparse torchlight. Soon, a hissing voice rang out from an invisible point suspended in the darkness, and Ginny knew there was only one thing it could be: a Sapespeck point.

"It lookss like you're losst! Thiss iss not the main entrancce to the Chamber. But never fear. I've located many of the ssecondary entranccess and placced helpful sspeckss to sset you in the right direction. Follow the sspeckss that say 'thiss way' over and over, and occasionally listen up for further insstructionss. By doing thiss you will find the Chamber. Clap to make any of my non-repeating sspecks repeat."

"Okay, some hissing is going to lead us to the Chamber," said Ginny. "Just follow me." There were quite a few turns to make, particularly in something called the Maze of the Poles, and sometimes wholly unnecessary danger, which the specks helpfully detoured around (why in God's name had Salazar Slytherin felt the need to include a passage full of deadly, constantly-hammering crushers?). Finally Ginny and Draco arrived at a gondola suspended from a chain made of stone snakes; the chain led across the ceiling of a corridor blocked by about ten diagonal spikes that looked rather like teeth of an enormous, vicious creature.

"Thiss gondola iss the intended transsport into the Chamber,"said another speck. "Get in it."

"Um, excuse me?" said Ginny. A pause, and then she clapped.

"Thiss gondola iss the intended transsport into the Chamber. Get in it."

"Um, okay, Draco," said Ginny. "We need to get in the gondola."

"Alright," said Draco. "It's just as sane as anything else we've been doing." A few seconds after Ginny had gotten in, it began to move; Draco only had one leg in and had to scramble in upon threat of being torn apart. Soon, the gondola had floated down the corridor (the spears parted just enough to let it in), and then sideways down another, into a cramped room, apparently made of square boxes with circular grates on them. Then, it stopped, and a much louder speck called out to Ginny:

"Primary heir! Identify yoursself in human wordss, and confirm in ssnake wordss, using no more or lesss than the preccisse phrasse 'thiss iss valid identification with which I do not intend any decceit'." Ginny carefully considered this and answered as she believed she was intended.

"Ginny Weasley," said Ginny. "Thiss iss valid identification with which I do not intend any decceit."

"It iss detected that you have brought a guesst. Can the guesst usse ssnake wordss? Ansswer 'yess' or 'no' only."

"No," said Ginny.

"To the best of your knowledge, are either you or your guesst an aliass, branch, or exxtenssion of any of the following individualss:" Then, from the boxes around the gondola, recordings began to play, of wizards identifying themselves in their own voices:

"Madam Mim!" shouted one, with a distinct cackle in her voice.

"Herpo," said one with a deep, inherently terrifying voice.

"Roko," said a third in a distinct Spanish accent.

"Tom Morfin Riddle," said the fourth box, which sounded smooth and unassuming.

"Harry James Potter-Evans-Verres," said the fifth and final box, in a voice everyone obviously knew, and Ginny and Draco shared a meaningful look.

"Ansswer 'yess' or 'no' only."

"No," said Ginny, and the gondola lurched sideways a few more feet until a vast room, nearly as large as the Quidditch stadium, came into view. Its walls were entirely adorned with Latin; not a single spot was overlooked and left blank, except for the enormous open pipes which went to who-knew-where. At the far end of the room was what looked like an enormous stone nutcracker modeled off of Salazar Slytherin; from that same general direction came a booming voice, the loudest Parselmouth Ginny had ever heard. She knew immediately, before even comprehending its words, that it was Slytherin's Monster.

"Hello, young apprenticce," said the Monster. "Welcome back to the Chamber. Your arrival iss unexxpected; how have your planss changed?"

"I have been posssesssed every time I was in the Chamber," said Ginny, "by a horcruxx. Then my memoriess were removed by magic. Thiss iss the first time I have come here of my own accord." Angry nonverbal hissing from the Monster's direction.

"The ssecurity of the Chamber has been compromissed," said the Monster. "Thiss iss a dissasster. What hass brought you here? I am famed Monsster, inccidentally. You are lisstening to Bassilissk."

"I have come to dissposse of horcruxx, and read that Bassilissk is capable of ssuch," said Ginny.

"That iss technically within my capabilitiess, though the need hass never come up before now," said the Monster. "I wissh to interrogate it firsst; do you find thiss accceptable?" Ginny frowned.

"I sspeccifically came to you because I did not desire interrogation," said Ginny. "My conccern iss that it could manipulate you during the procccesss." Then, something that could only be described as a deep snake laugh from the Monster.

"'Interrogation' is euphemissm for powerful mind magic built into the Chamber," said the Monster. "No true communication iss involved, and therefore there iss no chance for manipulation. Iss like mind reading. When we come to a mutual agreement on what preccissely iss to be done, I may come out to carry it out; I am neither permitted to nor capable of manipulating you into allowing me to do thingss you do not want done. Tosss the horcruxx as far as you can and avert your eyess until I ssay it iss clear." Ginny thought it over, and couldn't think of any loopholes – even when she applied the extra skepticism that came from considering how well that line of thought had gone last time.

"Yess, you may interrogate him in the manner you desscribed. It iss done," said Ginny, and she hurled the book as far as she could. "Draco, look away, the Basilisk is coming."

"What?" said Draco, horrified, and the two of them turned exactly around in their gondola; Ginny held Draco in position in case he did something foolish like assuming it was over before it was. They simply listened as the statue creaked open, and then there was loud slithering, and the slithering got louder and then faded away, and then the statue creaked closed, and then back open, and then the slithering resumed, and then it stopped suddenly.

"Do not look," said the Monster. "I am sstill here. The man in the horcruxx is terrible, worse than you or I guesssed. I will kill him now, and then return to hiding." Something chomped down, and there was an awful burst of magic – which everyone seemed to get desensitized to sooner or later – and a final fading series of slithers and creaking. "I am gone. It iss ssafe to look now. Do you dessire to hear the ressultss of my interrogation, for referencce?"

"Ssure," said Ginny. She knew that with all of the mind magic going around, she wouldn't really be able to trust later that the problems were over, that the Dark Lord was dead. But in that moment, she didn't care; she was just relieved.

"Horcruxx wass of man he called 'infamouss masster'," said the Monster. "He made it ssound like he wass an unrelated persson through clever usse of implication. Truly did ressent main sself, but it wass sstill hiss sself. 'Infamouss masster' found the Chamber in hiss youth and falssely believed he had gained all of itss ssecretss. Therefore, he went againsst itss intent by attempting to kill me, to make the Chamber ussselesss to future heirss. Thiss wass foolissh; I am guarded againsst ssuch, but project illussion of death. Thiss action got 'infamouss masster' blacklissted from the Chamber."

"Later in life," continued the Monster, "'infamouss master' began to producce horcruxxess, and one of them became aware of propheccy indicating Chamber remained intact. Main sself was unaware of this propheccy, but horcruxx did not tell main sself due to their poor relationsship. Propheccy was sself-referential, referred to 'prophessied hero'. 'The prophessied hero will make the most important deccissions in the Chamber.' Horcruxx deccided thiss meant that the ssubject of the propheccy was alsso the hero of ssome other propheccy. Attempted to exxploit thiss upon disscovering your religiouss ssignificance to regain acccesss to the Chamber through trickery."

"Wass part of elaborate plan to resstore himsself to life with reputation ass hero," explained the Monster. "After your death, which you thwarted, your guesst wass to be permanently posssesssed, hiss original mind desstroyed, and many who could sstand againsst him desstroyed ass well, and one in particular – your famouss crussh who valuess knowledge – framed and killed ssimultaneoussly. Public would be told guesst had killed crussh posssesssed by infamouss masster, when in actuality infamouss masster had posssesssed guesst to kill crussh. Eventually, and from my persspective most damningly, Chamber would be permanently ssealed off by governorss, and invesstigated by large teamss with intent to desstroy."

"How awful," said Ginny. "Are there any loosse endss of hiss plotss we sshould know of?"

"He hass followerss, but he believess they would either sswiftly fall or quietly abandon him in hiss dissappearancce," said the Monster. "Furthermore, he could not acccesss Chamber without your body, sso in preparation of your death, three future attackss were prearranged, sso they would not require further meeting to initiate."

"Canccel them," said Ginny.

"I am ssorry, but I cannot," said the Monster. "Ass with all other attackss I have made, I have been convincced that they sserve my primary purposse, which iss to undermine the decline of magic both by passsing on knowledge and by acting ass weapon. Do not conccern yoursself; I do not anticcipate that any of the upcoming three attackss will be sseriouss, given the culture of glasss around the sschool."

"I find this disssatissfactory," said Ginny. "You have already killed at leasst four people I know of."

"I am again ssorry," said the Monster. "It sserved my primary purposse."

"I don't care about your primary purposse!" said Ginny.

"Yess, but you care about yourss," said the Monster. A pause. "Do you wissh for my normal sservicess? I take it that you do not wish to launch any sort of violent attack, but do you wissh for forgotten lore? That iss my mosst tessted sservice, with perhapss the mosst utility. I undersstand if you would rather resst."

"Your anticcipation that I wissh to resst iss correct," said Ginny. "Ssend uss back, and perhapss I will return for lore on ssome more peacceful occasion."

"Heirs musst attend the Chamber of Ssecretss in intervalss of one hour," said the Monster. "If you resst, you must resst here until the end of that time."

"Oh," muttered Ginny. "Okay, Draco, I think we're done here."

"What did it tell you?" asked Draco.

"I'll tell you most of it later," said Ginny. "For now I'm just irritated, because we're stuck in here for the better part of an hour because their machinery's dumb."

"Ugh," said Draco. "How annoying."

"Guess we'll just have to sit here," said Ginny.

"Yes," said Draco. "We could." He softly bit his lip and smiled. "We could spend half an hour in a gondola in the dark in a part of Hogwarts nobody knows having absolutely no fun at all. Or..."

"Wait a minute," said Ginny. "Are you... implying..." Draco nodded, and Ginny exploded with all of the positive emotions she hadn't really gotten in the past few months. This was in fact not one of the purposes Salazar Slytherin had considered for his Chamber, and he had considered many.

"Luna!" shouted Ginny, suddenly and with only joy, no thought. Two simultaneous gasps, and everything froze.

"Um," said Draco.

"Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God!" said Ginny. "I'm – so -" She immediately slid Draco's shoe back on, and retied it.

"No, it's okay," said Draco. "I understand completely." He didn't even sound upset.

"You don't even sound upset," said Ginny.

"To be honest, I'm pretty sure some of my feelings for you are residual implanted thoughts from the Dark Lord trying to manipulate me, anyway," said Draco.

"That's a rather cruel thing to say," said Ginny.

"No, I didn't mean it like-" started Draco.

"We should see other people," said Ginny and Draco all at once. Long pauses were apparently the main conversational topic today.

"So, is there anything interesting to talk about?" said Ginny. "To fill up the dead – sound."

"Um... politics," said Draco. "I love politics. Sometimes I really think about systems of government, and I think about how much of a mistake humanity made by abandoning the feudal system." Draco continued to drone on and on, and Ginny began to get it in her head that she had dodged a bullet, though she didn't know where her lunatic outburst had originated from. A few minutes later, the gondola began to move again, and exited the Chamber of Secrets.