Niantic Releases 'Pokemon Stay' For The Quarantined

SAN FRANCISCO, CA—For gamers quarantined in their homes due to the Coronavirus, Niantic has released a new version of Pokemon Go: Pokemon Stay.

The game rewards players for sitting idly in their homes, awarding players who stay home with various Pokemon, items, and gym badges. It even comes with an alarm that alerts you if you're getting too close to other players of Pokemon Stay, reminding you to stay at least six feet away from other players at all times.

Players who leave their homes are immediately attacked by members of Team Rocket, who try to steal their Pikachus with increasingly outlandish schemes. Then, Team Rocket will lecture you on how you should have stayed home and practiced safe social distancing before their plans are foiled by an incredibly obvious flaw and they "blast off again."

"Set out on a fun adventure to catch Pokemon, as long as you don't leave your home," said a Niantic rep. "Sitting still on the couch generates tons of cool Pokemon for you to catch. Those who don't socialize, leave their homes, or move around much at all will excel at Pokemon Stay."

"So yeah, it's pretty much just regular Pokemon, I guess."

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