

Video by Jessica Leibowitz/Gothamist

Hillary Clinton may have been mocked for mis-swiping her MetroCard, but no New Yorker, not even the most native among us, has a .400 swiping record—there is no Ted Williams of swiping. Embrace our commonality in this.

Just as we've all juuuuust missed getting on the subway train, we've also all taken a swipe and been nailed in the crotch by the unrelenting turnstile bar. "Swipe card again at this turnstile," the screen demands. "Insufficient fare," it shames. What happens in the next few seconds is crucial, as a series of failed swipes could very well break you. If you are met with success on swipe two, all is good. If you enter the 3+ swipe territory, you will feel one of the following emotions, as provided by the Gothamist staff:

Jen Carlson: What is your main emotion when you have to swipe your MetroCard 3+ times? Shame, Frustration, Anger, Hopelessness, Other

Jessica Leibowitz:stupid stupid.

Miranda Katz: Anger but as if it’s someone else’s fault.

Ben Yakas: Fear. I don't want anyone to think I'm a tourist/don't know what I'm doing.

John Del Signore: Minor forgettable annoyance.

Jake Dobkin: I worry that this whole sham of being a cool native New Yorker has just come crashing down around me and now everyone knows the truth.

Nathan Tempey: I worry about getting rear-ended.

Emma Whitford: Anxiety that I’m holding people up who are behind me.

Rebecca Fishbein: Yeah that one! Definite shame.

Ben Yakas: You can't copy someone's emotional response, come up with your own.

In the above video (filmed at five Manhattan subway stations) what we mostly see is hopelessness, infused with a little frustration, and very few victory swipes. Also, some fairly stylish turnstile jumping.

N.B.: The MTA recently declared the speed, in miles per hour, of a proper MetroCard swipe: "a speed of 10 to 40 inches per second (i.p.s.) is the valid range for MetroCard acceptance by the Swipe Reader/Writer (SRW) device of our turnstile." The NY Times translated this: "Ten inches per second is 0.57 m.p.h.; forty i.p.s. is 2.27 m.p.h." This information will likely help no one, so the struggle continues.