Transcript

NARRATOR: 75,000 light-years away, in Sol system...

BRISTLECONE: SSTC has re-routed our approach, General.

GEN. TAGON: AGAIN? How bad is it this time?

BRISTLECONE: We won't reach Earth-local traffic for another six days. We'll arrive at Mall-One about half a day after that.

GEN. TAGON: I'll go break the bad news to our passengers.

BRISTLECONE: Would you like me to take care of that for you, General?

GEN. TAGON: No. I've delivered worse news than this before.

BRISTLECONE: Indeed. And you use the same "would-you-like-me-to-help-plan-the-funeral" tone for everything.

Let me put a good spin on this, sir.

GEN. TAGON: Fine. I'm excited to see what you come up with.

NARRATOR: Four minutes later...

NICK: Cool! Can we talk during the show?

BRISTLECONE: Ancient Earth documentaries suggest that talking during this sort of show is required.

Screen: *countdown* 5