





(Warning: The following is sophomoric tripe that floats around the head of a professional man who should be more mature, but unfortunately, he is not. Discretion is advised. Now put on your best socks…because it’s business time.)

1.) if (open(pants) == CONST_GREENLIGHT) { wang = malloc(full_length); }

2.) bind(partner, &hands, sizeof(hands)); if (listen(partner, backlog) == CONST_SAFEWORD) { exit(CONST_BREAK_FROM_SPANKING); }

else

{

kill(PID_PARTNER_OH_NO_AN_ACCIDENT);

exit(CONST_PANIC_AND_RUN_TO_MEXICO);

}

3.) less talk | more head

4.) CSS_STYLE_ORGY

{

color: #696969;

}

5.) touch /etc/girlfriend &2 > /etc/pink &1 > /etc/stink

6.) Girl oGirlfriend = new Girl();

String strYourPackage = “pride”; if ((oGirlfriend.show(strYourPackage) && (strYourPackage.length() < 6))

{

oGirlfriend.chuckle(); java.util.zip.Deflater deflater = new java.util.zip.Deflater();

deflater.setInput(strYourPackage.getBytes()); pants.close();

}

7.) function watchJapanesePorn()

{

$(“japanese.man”).hover(function() {

$(“japanese.girl”).squatsClevelandSteamer();

}); $(this).myself.feelShame();

}



8.) Woman oGirlInChangingRoom = new Woman();

Stack oPeepingTom = new Stack(); oPeepingTom.peek();

oPeepingTom.pop();

oGirlInChangingRoom.shriek();

oPeepingTom.clear(); Police oCop = new Police();

oCop.catches(oPeepingTom); lock(oPeepingTom)

{

List oBigCellmate = new List();

oBigCellmate.insert(oPeepingTom);

}



Peter Bolton is the author of Blowing the Bridge: A Software Story and has also been known to be a grumpy bastard on occasion.