Today was a normal day until the intercom rang, I went to answer and somebody said "I'm the mailman, open" with a deep voice. My mailman isn't really that much big, but when he came up and I opened the door he suddenly had grown to over 2 meters high and was pure muscle. Since yesterday he had grown a Ron Swanson 'stache and smelled like pure bacon.

He went ahead and said, "here's your package, with great socks come great responsability". It was the socks who had turned him into the manliest of men!

I took the package and went to open it.

As soon as I tore the package apart a pack of wolves rushed through my door, and two bald eagles came flying through the window to land one in each of my shoulders. Also started noticing something strange in my face, I went to the mirror to look only to find that although I had instantly grown a beard just like Grizzly Adams.

Came back to where the socks were and took them out of the package, and that's when the wolves started howling. When I put the socks on I noticed my voice sounded just like James Earl Jones'.

So thank you anonymous gifter from the Netherlands for giving me the socks to rule all socks. Now I'm going to eat a turf and turf and wrestle some bears.