CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | Contact

Senator Michaelia Cash has today consulted on-again, off-again frenemy Pauline Hanson for some tips on how to survive life in prison.

In yet another example of the highest powered people in this country being no more tacticle or low brow as run of the mill degenerate criminals, Senator Cash has had to today ask for some advice from the only other Senator she can think of he’s been in prison.

This follows the news that the AFP is liaising with the Commonwealth Director of Public Prosecutions about whether charges should be laid over leaks from Federal Jobs Minister Michaelia Cash’s office about raids on the Australian Workers Union.

Some journalists were tipped off and waiting when Federal police officers raided union offices in Melbourne and Sydney last October to seize documents relating to donations made to Get Up and Labor candidates when Bill Shorten was head of the AWU.

It appears this leak may result in Michaelia Cash finally living out her dream of being in a similar scenario to the girls in Wentworth, where she can assert her alpha-status by plugging a sharpened plastic toiletry into someones lung until they stop breathing.

“It’s been a while since I was in the joint, love” said Senator Hanson.

“I’m not sure what they are using nowadays…”

“But let me suss it out. One of my guys just went in last week for raping and bashing his wife.”

“If not we can put the word out through the state governments. Plenty of good intel going in and out of Long Bay with some of those old Labor mugs”

Senator Cash initially denied her office had any involvement in the leak to the media but subsequently told a Senate committee her senior media adviser had confessed that he had tipped off the media before the raids.

He has since resigned.