Pune becomes more liberal

"What if the couple was employees of a company? Would the same judgment apply? They have committed no crime and this is a very bad signal to others"

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Bindumadhav Khire, gay rights activist and president of a men’s sexual health organization

Here’s a quick look at some films that portrayed

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Katti Batti (2015):

Shuddh Desi Romance (2013):

Cocktail (2012):

Mani Mangalsutra (2013):

For those who have not heard; a student couple (the girl is 20 and the boy, 19) in Kerala eloped to live together about six months ago. They were hunted down, separated by their parents and when their college found out, were made an example of by being dismissed. The girl, being a topper, challenged the college’s decision in the high court hoping to continue her education. But last week, the high court ruled in favour of the college, claiming that if they were bold enough to decide to live together “without even contracting a marriage,” they should also be ready to fact the “consequences.” Given that we live in a city that is young in more ways than one, it is necessary to explore just how free we are, as adults, to make our own personal decisions.To get some answers, we started by speaking to Asim Sarode, a human rights analyst and advocate. “This ruling is a misconstrued idea of justice. There is no law against premarital sex or a live-in relationship and neither does the college have any right to interfere in what students do outside its gates. The consensual age is 18 and both of them are above the age,” he points out.And while professors in the city agree with Asim, that this was not justice, they insist that an educational institution has certain moral commitments to its students. “As a teacher, I am morally responsible for a student of mine, but as an individual, I also understand that my student has the right to exercise a personal choice. As long as what he/she is doing does not cause personal harm (think drugs or indulging in violence) or create a problem for anyone else, the college has no role to play in it,” says professor Ruchi Jaggi, director, Symbiosis Institute of Media and Communication. To this, Swapnil Kamble, an assistant professor at Fergusson College adds, “Take FC Road for instance. There are so many bars around. It isn’t feasible to go to each one, scouting for my students and questioning them about what they are doing. If a student engages in activities that are prohibited on campus, that’s when the college’s right to exercise penalties comes in.”In fact, Aditya Farsole, an assistant professor at Nowrosjee Wadia College, says that it becomes an educational institution’s responsibility to protect such students. “If I get to know about my students being in a live-in relationship, I wouldn’t interfere. But these youngsters face a lot of difficulty, right from finding a place, to fear of being harmed physically and community reactions at large. So as a teacher who works closely with these youngsters, knowing that they are safe is important,” he says.You don’t need us to elaborate on how difficult it can be for unmarried couples to find accommodation. However, the same hostility is not shown to bachelors and spinsters, making it easier for same-sex couples to find a place to stay. But going by civil rights advocate Aroona Nafday, Pune is slowly warming up to concepts that society still regard as taboo. “In areas like Koregaon Park and Kondhwa, there are fewer objections. And in cases where the society or neighbours object, some landlords even advise their tenants to say that they are married, when questioned. Despite this, youngsters found living together are threatened or discriminated, when in fact, legally, no one can question them or send police to barge into their personal space,” she shares, citing examples of her own friends, who are comfortable renting to unmarried couples.Shedding further light on this, Sanchit Sethi, the founder of a website that aggregates hotels and serviced apartments that are open to unmarried couples, says, “Around eight to 10 hotels in Pune have signed up with us. The resistance was equal to Delhi and Mumbai, when we approached hotels, but Pune was the most liberal.” Don’t believe him? You will, after you learn that several students of residential campuses rent out service apartments, to spend time with their friends or lovers, over the weekend. “Live-in relationships are still a big deal, but premarital sex is quite common among students now. I stayed in a hostel in Pune and had roommates who visited their boyfriends’ apartments over the weekend,” says Tanya Ranjan, who graduated from Nowrosjee Wadia College two months ago.- with inputs from Dean LoboNikhil Advani’s film is about a couple that falls in love and lives in for five yearsA boy absconds from his wedding, meets a girl and enters a live-in relationship in this film by Maneesh SharmaTwo girls and a guy live together in this love triangle by Homi AdajaniaThe Marathi film by Gauri Saravate takes up the topic of live-in relationships when it was still taboo in the country