Hey Gang - yet another summertime time waster. How many M&M's fit into a Klein Bottle?

I cannot squeeze M&Ms into my Classical Klein Bottles, because the neck diameter is slightly less than the diameter of an M&M. But you can put them into a Bottom Mouth Erlenmeyer (I use wider diameter tubing for this type of Klein Bottle. Which leads to the obvious question: How many M&M's are there inside this Klein Bottle?

Remember, these Klein Bottles have Zero volume. And they're one-sided. No edges. Nonorientable. Nonvolatile.

HERE IS THE WINNING ENTRY

June 2002: I took a *long* time to tabulate the entries. Mainly, I was lazy, what with about 300 entries. The answer is 547 M&M's. Most guesses were in the 200 to 400 region, with many "zeros" and "all in the world" and a couple "infinities". About ten entries were wonderful: sonnets, poems, haiku, and generally nice writing. I'll post 'em when I find the time...

23 Sept 2001: CONTEST IS NOW CLOSED - I AM TABULATING THE RESULTS AND COUNTING M&M's.. About 100 entries came in (a few people entered twice). I'll read all the email this week, figure out which are the best entries, and notify winners, and post the results here,. Probably around the end of September.

Sept 27, 2001 -- I've been reading entries (but I haven't yet counted the M&M's). (A short summary: 93 legible entries arrived; 2 or 3 people entered twice; many UK entries, several delightful notes, poems, haiku, and a most fascinating scientific paper. How can I judge this one???)

Here's a standard Acme bottom-mouth Klein Bottle, made of borosilicate glass. It's filled all the way with M&Ms, from the mouth through the nexus, up through the top loop, and into the reservoir.

Contest rules:

One entry per person, unless you have several real good ideas. But if you enter many times, and they're all boring entries, the judges will probably reduce your score.

Entries can be via email to the usual email address at this domain dot com, letter, postcard, package, teleportation, mental imagery, bowling ball, or other media. If you send email, please use the word "Contest" someplace in the subject header, so that my filter will correctly route your email. (I am *not* collecting email addresses to spam. Indeed, I probably won't reply to most entries unless you ask me to.)

Winner may be judged on accuracy, precision, creativity, rhyming & meter, basal metabolism, or some other criteria.

Axolotls are not allowed to enter, unless landbased.

Rules may change depending on the whims of the judge(s). Feel free to mix metaphors.

Each entry become the property of Acme Klein Bottle, and may be used by Acme to promote or demote its goods. I'm baffled how I could do so, but I figure I might as well say so.

If nobody enters, I'll eat those M&M's myself. (aah- as of August 13, entries are arriving at the astounding rate of one per day. Just 1 more month...)

Winner receives the bottom-mouth Erlenmeyer Klein Bottle pictured below, including the M&M's (which will be somewhat stale by then). For a really fantastic entry, I may send a Klein Stein of M&M's.

Runner up receives a Klein Bottle Hat . Honorable mention gets a Baby Klein Bottle.

Contest ends on the 2001 Autumnal Equinox, whenever that is. I'll post a list of winners here, unless you demand anonymity. No purchase required, but it sure won't hurt...

CONTEST ENDS SEPT 22, 2001 at 4:05 PM Pacific Daylight Time (As of Sept 20th, about 80 people have entered. I haven't looked at the entries yet.)

Same Klein Bottle, but with a calibration label to help you count the M&M's. A Close Up of the Klein Bottle. Notice that there are no Blue M&M's in here. Question: how many blue M&Ms were removed from the mixture?