Late-night hosts on Wednesday discussed the mounting sexual assault allegations against Alabama senatorial candidate Roy Moore in the run-up to the 12 December special election against Democrat Doug Jones.

“There’s an update to the story of Alabama Senate candidate and guy-who-just-can’t-believe-it-took-this-long-to-get-caught, Roy Moore,” Stephen Colbert began.

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“Many Republican lawmakers have denounced Moore, but some of them are standing by their man, like Alabama congressman and man-who-could-not-be-identified-in-a-line-up-of-one Mo Brooks,” the host continued. “Brooks was asked by a reporter yesterday if he believed Roy Moore’s accusers, and Brooks looked that reporter right in the eye, and ran away.”

Colbert then showed video of a reporter asking Brooks about the accusations against Moore; Brooks ran down a stairwell and said: “The Democrats will do great damage to our country.”

“Mo Brooks isn’t the only one who believes in Roy Moore, and his supporters are pulling a few dirty tricks, including a curious new robocall seeking damaging information on Moore,” Colbert explained. “The robocall isn’t actually looking for dirt on Moore; it is a fake message designed to discredit the Washington Post, who broke this story, and make the listeners think the accusations are just part of a vast conspiracy.”

“The recording is, well, let’s say it’s not pro-semitic,” Colbert joked, before playing the audio, in which a fake reporter named Lenny Bernstein asks for Alabama residents to come forward with damaging info on Moore in exchange for thousands of dollars.

“Oh come on, a Jewish journalist part of a media conspiracy,” Colbert said. “The only worse stereotype would be a family-values southern evangelical who turns out to be a secret perv.”

Samantha Bee also took aim at Moore, and at Alabamans still supporting him.

“Republicans have to ask themselves a tough question: which is worse, electing an alleged pedophile or a Democrat?” Bee began.

She then showed numerous Republican lawmakers being asked about the Moore allegations when the story broke, to which they had no response. Later on, numerous Republicans came out and called for Moore to step aside.

“After a few days to weigh the pros and cons, Republicans are totally anti-child molester, except for the ones in Moore’s own state,” Bee continued, playing various defenses of Moore, from a man who said the accusers should be prosecuted for waiting this long to come forward, and another who compared Moore’s behavior to that of Joseph and Mary.

“I may be a dirty liberal now, but I went to Catholic school,” Bee fired back. “Even I know the Bible says my teenage crush – sexy, buff Jesus – was an immaculate conception. How can you call yourself a Christian and not know your hero’s origin story?”

“This isn’t just an Alabama problem. It’s a human problem. It’s easy to condemn someone else’s predator, but it’s harder when it’s your own critically acclaimed pervert,” Bee said, showing a photo of Louis CK, who recently admitted to years of sexual misconduct. “Each community has to kick out their own creeps.”

Finally, Comedy Central’s Trevor Noah discussed congressional efforts to lessen the president’s unilateral power to fire nuclear weapons.

“People say that Congress never gets anything done,” he began. “But yesterday, they got more nothing done than I have ever seen before. First, attorney general Jeff Sessions flew in from the North Pole to explain to the House judiciary committee why his memory is perfect, except when it comes to remembering Russians.”

“Then, out of nowhere, it came out that the Senate Republicans’ tax plan will now include repealing Obamacare’s individual mandate, which would mean 13 million fewer Americans having healthcare,” Noah explained. “This is super sneaky. They couldn’t repeal Obamacare outright, so now they’re just going to try and Bill Cosby it. Slip it into something else so America wakes up the next day like, ‘What the hell happened to our healthcare?’”

Trevor Noah on Trump and nuclear weapons.

“While all of this was happening, over in a different Senate room, they were trying to figure out how to baby-proof America’s nuclear arsenal,” Noah said, adding that it was the first time in more than 40 years that the Senate had considered limits on the president’s unchecked powers to launch nuclear strikes.

“That dude has the impulse control of the first kid to die in the Wonka factory tour,” Noah said, noting Trump’s saber-rattling towards North Korea. “That’s why they’re having these meetings. And if you’re for some reassurance about President Augustus Gloop, there is some good news.”



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Noah showed footage from the hearings, in which one expert assured others that the process of launching a nuclear weapon is more than leaning on a button.

“There is no need to panic. The process of launching a nuclear weapon has been idiot-proofed,” Noah joked. “It’s just on the off chance that America ever elects an idiot president.”