Arsene Wenger should stay. His Arsenal teams transcend sport and enter high art In 1922 when Howard Carter discovered Tutankhamun’s tomb, it is said that one of the hieroglyphics on the wall could […]

In 1922 when Howard Carter discovered Tutankhamun’s tomb, it is said that one of the hieroglyphics on the wall could be translated as ‘Wenger Out.’

Well it wouldn’t surprise me, such is the fuss to get rid of Arsenal’s chief chef every time one of his team recipes fails to win a Michelin star.

But football fans get greedy – once they’ve won a trophy, coming second is never good enough.

If all the teams that deserved to be at the top of the league, back ‘where they belong’, the Premier League would have to be run like one of the those PC school sports days where no-one wins, and everyone gets an ice lolly.

What are we all doing anyway? Why should the eleven millionaires I don’t really know, be constantly better than the eleven millionaires you don’t really know?

Didn’t most of us choose our teams on a whim aged six, usually on the basis of who our friends or relatives supported?

Entertainment business

But as they say, its not so much what you do, as the way that you do it. Football is an entertainment business after all.

If you’re going to ‘park the bus’ please make sure it’s a vintage beauty, restored with the original shade of paint. (I know, I know some teams can only afford two transit vans welded together).

In short, I would prefer a team that has the potential to produce a moment (and not necessarily a goal) of such beauty that in posterity it wins more than just the match.

Bergkamp v Dabizas 2002, Wilshere v Norwich 2014, Giroud’s scorpion kick v Crystal Palace 2017.

Sure there are times when Arsène Wenger’s teams have lacked character, but he seems averse to bullies both on and off the pitch.

He’s a collector not an Uber driver, and chooses mostly Ferraris that don’t always start on a cold afternoon in Chelsea, let alone Stoke.

But hey, when they do roar to life, the big picture transcends sport itself, and the intersection of the Venn diagram is shared with high art.

‘Arsenal goal’

And good art makes everyone’s life better. There’s even a recognised phenomenon now called an ‘Arsenal goal’.

A team success of such skill and grace that it can only be truly appreciated in slow motion. (Unlike the impatient fans, history will conveniently forget the other ninety-nine moves that were over-played).

This manager’s only vice is the stubbornness of a donkey, who brilliantly refuses to wake up and smell the salami.

But if you take an average of trophies won and final league positions, compared to other teams, his belligerence has served him and his club well.

Supply teacher

Arsenal fans need to be careful what they wish for. When they pension off the professor they may well end up with a succession of mercenary supply teachers who are more keen to be liked, than stick to principles.

Its true, there’s a new hired hand in town – Guardiola, his shiny head like a priceless Faberge egg reposed on a cushion in the honeymoon suite, where the owner’s room service will bring him every player he desires.

But we’ll see how he’s doing in twenty years time. (He’ll have moved on many times of course, each just before he’s about to be caught in the cross-hairs of being rumbled).

Wenger’s into injury time now, but he’s pulled off many Houdini acts before. (As long as he’s not asked to get out of his big anorak in a hurry).

Long may he stay – in fact if I were him, I’d make a point of opening a top notch gastro-pub on the side, called the Wenger Inn.

Milton Jones is on tour from February. For tickets visit here