Today I finally made it to the Winter Festival. As I walked past the food stands, towards big open space with the cheerful music and the colourful crowd, I finally felt it. “I’m home.”

In Shang Simla they don’t believe in coffee. They drink this horrible tea I couldn’t get used to even after a year. Just for me they got some coffee from time to time though, but it wasn’t like over here: coffee is like water, it’s like it’s flowing from the taps too. So of course the first thing I did was to make sure I have a latte.

I made my way to the ice rink, the warmth of the paper cup tingling on my fingers. My eyes caught a familiar form, spinning on the ice in sync with the upbeat music.

Ben.

“Abbie! I didn’t know you are back!”

I nearly dropped my coffee when I felt a hand fall on my shoulder. I spun around, heart about to jump out of my chest, and found myself standing only a step away from Hailey. She looked pregnant. Apparently some things don’t change.

“Oh, hi, Hailey. You scared the living daylights out of me”, a nervous giggle escaped my mouth.

“I see you met Gavin’s girlfriend.”

“Gavin’s… who?”, I asked with a tone that indicates I don’t really want an answer. The last person I wanted to talk to was Hailey, and Gavin and I broke up over a year ago. But I guess this is what happens when you move to a new country. Your life goes on, but for the people you left behind you are still just the girl who broke up with Gavin. They will pick up your life where you left it.

“Bettina, the girl at the coffee kiosk”, she nodded towards the blond girl who served me. “If I were you I wouldn’t drink that. Maybe she poisoned it.” Hailey seemed greatly amused by her own funniness.

I doubt Gavin even told her about me. But I dropped my coffee in the nearest bin nevertheless. I wanted to escape, but Hailey just followed me around, telling me things I didn’t want to hear and asking me questions I didn’t want to answer.

“So, have you found someone over there? Maybe you secretly got married?” Another weird chuckle.

“No, Hailey, nothing like that happened. I was there to work.” I was pretty exasperated and wanted her to stop grilling me, so I did the only thing I knew will focus her attention on something else. “How are things with you?”, I asked her.

“Well…”, she said and started rubbing her hands up and down on her swollen belly. “Me and Ben are expecting our third one. It’s amazing, Abbie, you should try. I’m sure you wouldn’t be such a sour face if you had a baby to brighten you days, and a loving man to take care of you.”

I just rolled my eyes. There’s no point to argue with Hailey. She firmly believes that no woman can be ever complete or experience true love without popping out a bunch of kids, while some undefined manly entity silently slaves away in the background to provide money for his lovely family. I really wanted to put an end to this conversation, so I think I was a bit more snarky than usual when I said “So I take it you two got married while I was away.”

There was a flicker of annoyance on her face. It passed as quickly as appeared, and that sickly sweet smile was back almost immediately.

“Well, no, we haven’t. You know, Ben wants to focus on his business career, which is understandable, he would only want the best for us, and he’s expecting a promotion any day now, and then we will of course get married, I already picked the flower arrangements. You have to come, Abbie, it will be amazing…” she was rambling. I obviously touched on some nerve. I know it’s probably wrong, but man, I was pleased with myself. She was still going on about her wedding when I patted her on the shoulder, wished her good luck, and walked away.

It was noon and I wanted to find Alani. She said she will meet me for lunch. I was busy fiddling with my phone and almost ran into Ben. Literally.

“Hey, Abbie! I knew I saw you earlier”, he said with a big smile, and grabbed my hands, holding me at arms length, looking me all over. “You look absolutely stunning as always.”

“Ben…”, I blushed a bit. “It’s lovely to see you. How are you?”

“You know, same old, same old…”, he waved a hand in front of his face, like he was dismissing even the idea of anything interesting ever could happen to him.

“I met Hailey.”

“Oh…”, he said, shoulders sagging. “Well, then I guess you already heard the news.” He looked defeated. Not exactly the look you would expect to see on the excited father to be.

“Yes, so I suppose congratulations are in order”, I said and squeezed his hands, trying to seem enthusiastic. “I’m sure it will be a beautiful ceremony, but I don’t think I should go. It would be weird.”

“The what? I’m sorry, I don’t… understand”, he looked dumbfounded.

“Your wedding? You know, after your promotion..”, I was so confused. Ben squirmed uncomfortably, like he just wanted to wanted to disappear, go up in a puff of smoke and stop existing.

“Listen”, he said. “I better go now, but I’d love to catch up with you really soon.” He left, nearly running.

I finally found Alani and told her about my earlier encounters over a burger. She slapped her forehead and let out a grunt.

“My little sister is so stupid. She always had her ways, even when we were children. This is why I can’t stand her.” Then she told me how Hailey and Ben almost broke up soon after I left. Apparently Ben spent most of his time at work, leaving Hailey to deal with their two kids alone. Then one night, during last winter Hailey called Alani, crying, telling her she thinks Ben doesn’t love her anymore and is probably going to leave her. Alani tried to explain to her sister, that sometimes this is for the best, and that she’s still young enough to find someone else. But the next thing she heard a few weeks later were the news of Hailey’s pregnancy. Apparently there were some complications, and because of her delicate condition she was not able to work. So Ben, the always so caring and loyal Ben, buried himself in his work to take care of the mother of his children, like any man with a good sense would.

“Why didn’t you tell me this earlier?”, I asked, throwing my arms up in the air. Alani looked at me like I was slow in the mental department.

“What would you have done? You were there for a year. Life hasn’t stopped just because you left. I also had a feeling that the main reason you took that assignment was to get away from all the drama”, she said, squeezing my hand.

“You are not entirely wrong about that”, I admitted.