Victorian top order sensation Will Pucovski was unbeaten on 64 after day one of a Sheffield Shield game against Western Australia in Perth in October.

His side was in a dominant position after skittling the home team for just 208 in 48.4 overs, plus he was hitting the ball crisply and a full day of batting beckoned.

But something was horribly amiss. The 20-year-old didn’t know what ‘it’ was or how it had evolved, but he knew there was no option but to call his parents and pour his heart out once back at the team hotel.

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Pucovski slept poorly and struggled to get out of bed in the morning. He could not think of a worse place to be than around others.

Remarkably, over the course of the next five hours, Pucovski crafted an immaculate 243 off 311 balls, becoming the first player since Ricky Ponting to smack a Shield double ton before his 21st birthday and the ninth Australian ever.

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Will Pucovski raises his bat after reaching a double century against Western Australia. Source: AAP

It was an innings teammates and coaches alike confirmed was nothing short of a masterpiece, littered with punching drives and piercing pull shots. It had some pundits mentioning his name as a smoky for the first Test against India and there was no semblance of weakness against the short ball.

But all was not well. Not by a long shot.

Talking candidly in an exclusive podcast interview with Fox Cricket, Pucovski revealed the mental anguish he was enduring while carving the West Aussie bowlers to pieces.

So serious was his illness, he would not play professional cricket for another six weeks and expects to receive regular counselling for the rest of his life.

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“It was one of those things where what it looked like from the outside wasn’t quite matching up with what it was on the inside… I was more confused than at any other time in my life,” Pucovski told The Follow-On podcast.

“I was 64 not out overnight if I remember. I got to the game to have my pre-morning hit in the nets and pulled one of the coaches, Lachie Stevens, aside and said ‘look mate, this is what I’m going through. I don’t really understand what’s going on and don’t know why it’s happening but this is what’s happening’.

“It was quite a confronting thing but they were beyond awesome about it… They were just so supportive from the outset.

“I still remember Lachie putting his arm around me and saying ‘Mate, I’m shattered for you and we will get you sorted when you’re back but if you can do anything to get us some runs today that would be great.’

“I replied: ‘Don’t worry mate. I will be ready to go and will try my very best.’ Obviously it turned out to be quite a good day.”

Pucovski made a further 179 runs before he was finally dismissed. He fielded for 25 overs in Western Australia’s second innings but each minute on the field became like a dagger to the chest, not because he couldn’t cope, but because he was deeply fearful a drop catch due to lack of concentration would hurt the team.

Tom Morris with Will Pucovski. Source: FOX SPORTS

He eventually asked to sub off the field and did not re-enter for the remainder of the match, which Victoria won by an innings and 45 runs.

Pucovski was highly emotional, sad and distressed but did not know why or how to explain it. In many ways he still finds it difficult to articulate beyond a mental health problem that he is working hard to get on top of.

Will Pucovski at the under-19 cricket championships in Adelaide. Source: Supplied

The sad irony of his greatest professional cricketing moment coinciding with his lowest personal moment is not lost on the right-hander, who now meditates every day and spoke openly in the hope his words would help others.

“I actually look back on it and don’t have much of a recollection on the innings, which is rare for me,” he continued.

“Usually I can remember vividly what I’d done, the innings that I had played or the day’s play I’d been through.

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“In a weird way it felt as if it was a bit of a cheat code. If I could find a way to do this consistently, obviously without the other things going on, it could bode for some success.”

In the Follow-On podcast, Pucovski also talks in-depth about:

- Why he told his parents

- How long he’d been suffering in silence for and why he stayed quiet

- The pivotal role of his mindfulness coach Emma Murray in his recovery

- The challenges he still confronts and strategies he adopts to live a healthy life

- How strangers, friends and family responded when his illness became public

- Whether his cricket longevity was ever in danger

- His advice for others who are struggling

- Why the professional sporting environment ‘protected’ him from mental illness,

- Plus more

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For further information about mental health, contact beyondBlue on 1300224636 or talk to your GP, local health professional or someone you trust.