Abuelitas everywhere USPS’d (abuelitas don’t do FedEx) a chilaquiles casserole to Rachel Frederickson when she came out on The Biggest Loser season finale looking like she pulled a Christian Bale. Rachel Frederickson, who is 5’5″, weighed 260 lbs. when she checked into The Biggest Loser and she weighed in at 150lbs. when she left the ranch as a finalist. During the three months between leaving the ranch and the finale, she lost another 45 lbs. and won that shit by dropping 60% of her body weight. Weighing 105 lbs. when you’re 5’5″ is considered overweight in Hollywood, but it’s underweight according to the Body Mass Index chart. Bitches gasped, lost their minds and threw fried chicken drumsticks at Rachel.

The Los Angeles Times says that during a conference call with the media, Rachel dodged all the eating disorder questions and refused to directly talk about how people are saying she took it too far. Rachel said that after she left the ranch, medical experts and training staff monitored her diet which consisted of five small meals a day. Rachel ate a mixture of carbs, protein and fats, and no more than 1,600 calories made it into her mouth hole on a daily basis. But Rachel probably burned many of those 1,600 calories, because she exercised like, well, like someone was waving a $250,000 check in front of her. 24-year-old Rachel walked on a treadmill for most of the day while she worked and she took Zumba and spin classes daily.

In case you don’t know, this is what walking on a treadmill while working looks like:

That is a torture device from HELL. Somebody should sue that company for misrepresentation. That model is telling lies with her face. It’s not possible for a sane human who feels real emotions and feelings to smile while working and walking on a treadmill at the same time. That’s like smiling while listening to a Justin Bieber song and watching Keeping Up with the Kardashians at the same time. If you can smile while doing that, you’re crazy and a sociopath. I can barely walk and talk at the same time let alone walk, type, read, fap and eat pork rinds at the same time. If I could do that, I wouldn’t go on The Biggest Loser, I’d go on ‘Murica’s Got Talent. Anyway, that’s what Rachel did all day.

Rachel’s twin Jillian Michaels and Bob Harper refused to comment on Rachel’s body, because they weren’t her trainers and weren’t with her while she was on a treadmill journey from hell. But Rachel’s trainer Dolvett Quince did spit out a statement on Facebook:

Last night’s Biggest Loser Finale has sparked a huge reaction and I do not want the day to end without addressing it. Biggest Loser is a journey which has its ups and downs. Please try not to look at one slice of Rachel’s journey and come to broad conclusions. Rachel’s health is and always has been my main concern and her journey to good health has not yet ended!!

Some people are still pissed and want NBC to release some kind of statement, because they think that The Biggest Loser is a show that promotes losing weight the healthy way and Rachel contradicts that message or something. Um, do these people know what they’re really watching. The Biggest Loser is The Real Hunger Games (Correction: I take that back, Survivor is The Real Hunger Games.) It’s basically a game show where people lose as much weight as possible to #getmoneybitch. And Rachel won that shit, and maybe like other past winners, she’ll gain some of the weight back.

But NBC should still do the responsible thing by airing a show that shows the other side. They should green-light a show called The Biggest Gainer where people gain as much chunk as possible for $250,000. Victory would be mine! (That’s if Jessica Simpson and/or KFed didn’t apply.)