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I sit hunched over a keyboard (alas computer not music) all day.

It is rubbish, I feel myself hunching to the point I should be swinging around Notre Dame ringing bells.

Because of this I spend the rest of my time trying to be as erect as possible (within the bounds of public decency).

Therefore when I walk to work through Adamsdown I always look like I have a bit of strut on.

In an attempt to keep my back straight and have my coat billow behind me like Tommy from Peaky Blinders I hold my head high and keep my shoulders square.

However this is going to have to change. This is because the Adamsdown and Splott areas of our city are so littered with dog muck that to have my eyes anywhere other than on the path would be foolhardy.

(Image: Shared Content Unit)

It may sound like an overstatement to say that “every single street has poo on it” but I am fairly confident in making the claim that, over the last three months, every street in Adamsdown has been pooed on.

I know some people will shrug their shoulders and just say this is an inevitable part of living in a city but I can’t.

It has now annoyed me to such an extent that I am unable to unsee every pooch turd I have witnessed littering my neighbourhood.

I am pretty sure it has got the point I can identify repeat offenders.

There is one dog that I am sure is being fed on raw sewage. The things it is producing are not natural.

It is like a little walking Chernobyl with its blast radius covering a very specific route that goes past my house.

There is one dog walker who I have confronted regarding their dog “releasing its faeces” (I am running out of ways to say poo without swearing) on a nearby street. “No bags mate” he replied as though him being too lazy to carry a bag was justification for what he was doing.

(Image: MIN)

Now you should never judge anyone on their appearance but if dogs did look like owners, his dog would have been an arrogant, sweaty mess with poor hygiene and Adidas trainers far cleaner than the street he had just desecrated.

Worse is that sometimes this poo remains on the streets for weeks. I walk past it twice a day as it slowly solidifies until it becomes emblazoned with a Nike tick or Hush Puppy logo when some poor sod inevitably stands on it.

About a year ago I wrote a piece on how locking up criminals and throwing away the key is counter productive. We should be rehabilitating people and not throwing the book at them.

Weirdly I don’t have the same level of compassion when it comes to dog fouling as I do with far more serious crimes.

When someone allows their mutt to defecate in the middle of a path an illogical, and thankfully very small part of me, wants to throw it at the back of their head.

Somehow it is even worse when people do bag up the poo but just leave it hanging on a tree. All you have done is introduce non biodegradable plastic into the mix!

I am unequivocally behind the plans for a £100 fine for people who let their dog dump on the pavement. I am also in favour of fines for people who do not carry bags with them to clear up the mess when they are on their “walkies”.

And yet, despite these fines being high and probably effective (if enforced) they do nothing to sate the sense of vengeance I feel.

I know this is almost certainly an over reaction (not to mention against human rights law) but I want to impose a rule that if you are caught not clearing up your dogs mess you should be legally obliged to let your dog poo in your own house for the next week.

You are not allowed to clear it up, let it out to do its business in the garden or put it in the bin. You are forced to live in the filth you’re are imposing on the rest of us.

What is even more annoying is that these people are ruining the good name of the vast majority of dog owners who clear up after themselves.

They are the equivalent of cyclists who ride on the pavement, the football fans who run on the pitch to punch Jack Grealish or person who says their starter was 75p cheaper when splitting the bill - a minority ruining it for everyone.