When Agt. Cooper spoke to Diane (his secretary), you almost always got a laugh out of it. The moments that he chose to immortilize on tape were brilliant and hilarious! Sometimes obscure and sometimes painfuly detailed....

A personal favorite monologue is when Cooper wakes up chewing an ear plug, mentioning he was dreaming of eating a "large, tasteless gumdrop..." ...Needing to cutdown on nighttime coffee consumption. *LOL*!!

Any ways, if you're like us, you probably really enjoyed the monologues and would like to see them again. So, here they are; for all of you who don't have access to Twin Peaks videos. or those of you who just want to see them again. Right now we have thirty-nine of them; partially transcribed from the videos and partially transcribed from "Diane, The tapes of Agt. Dale Cooper...."

Select your transcription from the links below. They are all in order from occurance. There are a few missing that are on the series, but not the tape. (For links w/o a time, it was because there was no time specified.)