Oh Sweet Baby Jesus! Help me, dear Lord Jesus! Are you trying to tell me that I'm going to have to re-write my entire fucking family Christmas newsletter?

Because if you are, let me just tell you that mo-fo train has LEFT the MOTHER-FUCKING STATION. I have already dropped my god dammed family Christmas newsletter off at the printer and Consuela has already addressed 400 envelopes by fucking Mexican hand!

Tell me, Detective..excuse me, it is "Detective" isn't it? Because you are about to "detect" my Louboutin heel up your fat, greasy policeman's asshole if you think I am going to revise or delay MY FAMILY'S MOTHER-FUCKIN CHRISTMAS NEWSLETTER! Do you even have A fucking clue how hard it will be to spin this when Bitsy Montgomery-Thorne sent her family Christmas newsletter out TWO goddamned weeks ago while HER FAMILY vacationed in St. Kitts?