My mind is full of thoughts, just like everyone. One of thesethoughts was, "What should I rap about?" I've rapped about so manydifferent things. What should I rap about next?" I've been thinking about this question for about 2 years now.

I recently received my first clue after someone asked me the first thing everyone asks me after they say hi.



"How's it going with Max Normal?" someone asked for the nine hundred and sixty-seven thousandth time.



It was only then that I recieved the light. Maybe I should call myself Max Normal again. Cause, no matter what Waddy Jones does, he'll never be as large as Max Normal.



But then what should I wear? Oh yes. Dress code: strictly formal. But now what would Max Normal rap about? Maybe try rapping like a motivational speaker. Just tell it like it is. Keep it real. You know what's up, so let everyone know what's up. Inspirational stuff, that will help people to try their best and never give up. That's very cool. Also rap about things that happen in South Africa, because you are from South Africa. Plus South Africa is so hot right now. So be sure to keep your rapping very universal and easy to understand.

Also your drawings are very cool. Your drawings are actually better than your rapping. You should rap like you draw. Real understandable, sticker-like, distinct, colourful, and bam! Real strong, and informative like road-signs. Almost industrial, yet cute. A real cool idea would be for you to illustrate every single one of your raps. Then turn your new live Max Normal shows into high-energy, hip-hop power point presentations, perfect for the club, concert, or boardroom. That's fresh.

You should get a team of live musicians together who all perform in 3 piece suits. We can set the stage up to look like an office, like with desks, and office chairs, coffee cups, a kettle, maybe a kak indoor fern. Ja, that's cool. Plus a big screen. Then my personal assistant, Yolandi Visser can animate my drawings and trigger them live to the beat.

What kind of music should I rap over? Base the music on the rapping. You're a very musical guy. You should work closely with someone to create really original music that raps itself around your stories, like one would compose the music to a film. Make sure the beats bump hard, like all-up-in-da- club hard, something for the taxis.



My friend Justin Denobrega makes the loudest beats I've ever heard in my life. His production is world-class.

Then work closely with him. But none of that sampling nonsense. Compose fresh music, based around your rapping. It would be a cool idea to mix rave music with hip-hop, like high-energy hip-hop. Like the energy of high-energy, rave music, mixed with the bump of gangster rap. That will create a real live charge for you to send your raps through. That's brilliant, people are going to start copying that! Don't worry, you thought of it first.



You should start off your show with a really dramatic intro. Something triumphant. Kick down the door and come through full-force. Call it something real, like 'ONS IS HIER.' A hundred percent energy comming through the speakers for the true believers. Cool.



Then you should explain your new style to your audience. Maybe remix that old "Hello, I'm Max Normal, dress-code: strictly formal" track, but then take it to the next level like, "Welcome to my 'POWER POINT PRESENTATION'." Like, combining entertainment with education. Something like that, and you should have a cool, motto like, "If you conceive it, and you believe it, you can achieve it!" That's a good one. Max Normal, all up in the boardroom: check it out we all gonna make a fortune! Exactly.



Then you should do a real commercial joint. Like some 'love-in-da-club' type thing? Ja. Rap about what everyone else is rapping about, just do it better than anyone. No problem. I'll call it 'I LIKE YOUR BODY'. Perfect.

Then maybe invent a new world or something, and a whole lot of cool, new characters. Maybe with a B.E. feel. What zone does Soweto go up to? I think Zone 5. OK, then why don't you create an animated black sit-com style world, like The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, or The Cosby show, just more South African and maybe mixed with the Twighlight Zone. Then write the theme tune to your spooky new world and call it 'ZONE 6'.

Also why don't you make up a video-game. Think of a fresh character with real original super-powers. I got this one character I thought of called 'GOLDEN MAN', who eats demons. That's cool. Write his theme-tune as the chorus for the song, then describe the game in your rap, like you there, in the game, moving through his world.

Also you should create some nursery-rhymish, lullaby tunes, mixed with hard-core, cartoon-boom beats, to go with your educational theme. Then think of a modern day African folk-tale that happens in ZONE 6, and turn it into a rap. Something for the kids. With a cool educational theme like 'BE YOURSELF'.



Also you can really take your educational theme to the max, and maybe write a track called 'RAP MADE EASY' where you teach kids how to rap. Start off real simple, and easy to follow. Then maybe get a little bit more advanced as you go along, so they have to try keep up with you. Flip, that's cool.



Then maybe take a break from the rap thing for a bit and sing something. You have a really lovely singing voice. Sing something romantic, and manly.



Something for the ladies. Explain what makes a man a 'DANGEROUS MAN TO LOVE'. That's hot. Maybe get Yolandi to kick something sexy on the hook. Definately.



Then you should also sing a love song, something beautiful and forever. Maybe call it 'TOUCH THE SKY' or something.



Then Yolandi writes those sick little ghost stories hey. Why don't you turn one of them into a creepy little bedtime rap. Ja, that's flippin cool. You know what, you should remix an old, well known, Afrikaans nursery rhyme, thrown in a fat beat, and flip the script a bit. I'm gonna call it 'BANG HASIE.' As in 'scared rabbit'? Mmhmm. Good one, good one.



Then also throw in something a little contraversal, to give them something to talk about. You should remix 'SUPER EVIL', but really make it super evil. OK? Maybe rap about racist people from South Afica.

"Here at MaxNormal.TV we believe that racism is wrong, because it leads to worse problems, like drug abuse and devil worship. At MaxNormal.TV we say NO to racism, NO to drugs, and NO to the killing of innocent animals for satanistic purposes. These things are wrong, these things are super evil."

That's funny. Then skop a rap by MC EUGENE TERROR, all in Afrikaans, as funky as you wanna be. Hard-core, industrial dancehall beats, with a really epic, mega-evil, dark, cathedral feel.



And you must also write a nostalgic, high-energy anthem for people like you. That's very cool. A real optimistic number. Call it 'SCUM DELUXE'.



Then bring it back with a rap to lean on. Like when you feeling sad, and the sad won't go away, you can bump this track, then you feel ok. Shit. Call it 'DON'T GIVE UP.' I love it.



And finish off with something futuristic. Take them to the next level. Me and my friend Jakob Basson made this incredible gothic, electro-pop tune called 'DESTRUCTO'.

It's not really rap. Well, it kind of is, in a percussive sense, but I sing it like a romantic dark lord, over a hot, pumping, gothic electro-rave tune. It's kind of surreal, but very powerful. Totally futuristic. That's what I'm talking about.

OK but now you need to come correct this time. Take this thing to the max. You got potential my boy. Alot people out there wanna see you do well. My friend, Brad Armitage, is my new buisiness manager.

Brad is one of the co-founders of the Vida E Caffe chain, voted by Wallpaper magazine as 'the best-looking coffee shops in the world hands down.' So soon I wanna be talking to the Vida E of rap. You know what I'm saying? Plus Brad also plays drums. There you go.



OK, so what's the new set-up? Break it down for me. Max Normal on vocals. Ja. Yolandi Visser, on visuals and vocals. OK. Justin Denobrega on synthesizer, and samples. Mmm. Jakob Basson on syththesizer, and Brad Armitage on electronic V-drums. Bam!



Also my homie, Anthony Dart is designing our whole new Max Normal campaign.