Decking is like Tony Blair; widely embraced in the 1990s, now an embarrassing legacy of the bad old days. And neither look as splendid as they once did. Decking hasn’t simply decayed into a mildewed death-trap, it’s accused of being plundered from rainforests to smother gardens where butterflies, hedgehogs and songbirds once flourished.

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At the cultural equivalent of a crimes against humanity trial, otherwise known as a confessional slot at a literary festival, Alan Titchmarsh has admitted responsibility for the rise of decking. According to Titchmarsh, before Ground Force – the garden makeover show first broadcast in 1997, when Tony Blair became prime minister – one DIY chain recorded annual sales of decking worth £9,000; afterwards it was £8m.

“I have no doubt that when I’m put in the ground eventually they will deck my grave,” said Titchmarsh. Fitting, really, given that we built the decking-graves for generations of hedgehogs and meadow browns.

In common with accused foot soldiers down the ages, Titchmarsh blames his bosses: decking was cheap and economical – ideally suited to a TV format that demanded the transformation of a garden in two days. We, in turn, blame our erstwhile leaders – Titchmarsh, Blair, Jeremy Clarkson et al; all those 1990s figures who forced us into naff gardening, polluting diesel cars and other things we regret.

It does seem that despising the recent past helps us to avoid confronting the atrocities of the present. But here there is an upside. Decrepit decking is a bountiful habitat for woodlice, spiders and other mini-beasts. It’s certainly not as bad for wildlife as that other pernicious practice, turning front gardens into gravel deserts for parking. One day I may grudgingly admit there were upsides to Blair as well.

Homes under the hedge

The destruction of a hedgerow might be low on the list of contemporary atrocities – but an uprising to save 450 metres of hedge in a Buckinghamshire village is a fable for our times. An ornithologist has recorded 66 house sparrows – a drastically declining species – in Aston Clinton’s fine old hedge of 10 tree species, which was probably planted when the field was enclosed in 1815.



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While it is against the law to knowingly destroy active bird nests, two environmental consultants for Bovis have concluded there are no signs of any new sparrow homes and so the hedge can be destroyed, to make way for 91 new human homes.

The builders must move fast to beat the spring-nesting birds, and peaceful direct action by Aston Clinton residents stopped the hedge being torn down last week. Residents have now won verbal assurances from Bovis that less than a quarter of the hedge will be destroyed.

A small victory then, but expect more uprisings against the increasing pace of development in the south-east. (Aston Clinton is besieged by new homes because the district council doesn’t have a local plan to set limits on development: the result is a developers’ free-for-all.)

Builders need to wise up: old hedges and mature trees are an asset and not an impediment.

A road for toads

Joyful is the day on which we suffer inconvenience to help another species. Charlcombe Lane, in Bath, is currently closed for seven weeks to allow toads safe passage to their mating grounds. Bravo the Charlcombe Toad Rescue Group, and Bath and North East Somerset council, for allowing right of way to another declining, and once common, species.

