This was my first year participating in Reddits Secret Santa and boy was it fun. I feel like my Santa looked through my fairly random and vague profile and got a really good sense of who I am.

All of my gifts arrived separately. Which increased the anticipation. To start with I received two shirts. The first one I opened was the one that stated "I'm Here. What are your other 2 wishes." When my recently married wife saw it she groaned and asked how my secret santa was able to figure me out so well from an online profile. The other shirt I received was instructions on how to pick up chicks with a man picking up chickens which was pretty dope. I have since worn both of these shirts multiple times.

The best gift though was the one that arrived in a moderately heavy box. When I opened the box I was slapped across the face with the aroma of vinegar. I thought to myself "Who the fuck sends someone vinegar in the mail?" I went to put the wrapped paper out and it was very moist and the vinegar smell was intensifying. After getting the wrapping paper out of the way I found two jars of pickles. SCORE! The problem was that one of the jars contained pickles that must have pulsated so hard in transit they broke they jar. For a moment I thought about eating those pickles immediately but then I noticed the many small glass shards and knew in my mind I had to desire to wind up on /r/WTF.