TERRITORY couples have found it hard to swallow the thought of sex advice from former trainee priest and now Prime Minister Tony Abbott.

While Mr Abbott’s tuition is not implicitly stated, sex lessons to “build intimacy” are being offered under Mr Abbott’s taxpayer-funded relationship counselling scheme.

And as he likes to don a hard hat and get his hands dirty, as a promotion for the scheme he will undoubtedly give some bedside counselling to at least one Australian couple stuck for a few ideas.

TAXPAYER-FUNDED SEX LESSONS FOR LOVERS

Relationships Australia has said it is running group sessions — no pun intended — on ‘sex and desire’ under the scheme.

The self-proclaimed ‘most romantic man in town’, Adam McGuire, was yesterday wooing Sarah Eagan at Darwin’s Shenannigans, also aptly known as ‘Shags’.

“I reckon he’d be an animal on the go,” he said.

“I think he’d like doggy style. He actually told me that himself. I was having a beer with him last week.”

Surprisingly Ms Egan said she really didn’t think Mr Abbott would have good sex advice.

“(But) His wife’s really good looking,” she said.

And what would Mr Abbott bring to the table on sex?

Sarah Naumoff suggested he’d probably recommend separate beds.

Another, who was too shy to give their name, suggested: “Don’t do it if you’re poor.”

While Anthony McEachran missed the Catholic Church’s pretty strong feelings about contraception.

“I think, at least hopefully, a condom,” he said.

But he did have advice for prime ministers generally.

“Stay out of the bedroom, unless the prime minister was Ricky Martin then Prime Minister Martin may enter the bedroom,” he said.

But thinking about Uncle Tony’s sex advice was considered creepy close to catching your parents having rogering each other and no one wanted Tony Abbott and sex advice to have a conjugal visit in the one sentence again.

“How do I wash my brain?” it was asked.