A client wanted a full-color banner in less than one day.

Client: Use these hi-res photos.

ME: Okay!

Client: Make sure you keep the file size small without affecting the quality.

Me: Uh… these photos are pretty detailed and hi-res. I’m not sure I can compress these without sacrificing quality.

Client: Yeah, don’t change the quality, but definitely make the file smaller.

Me: *close email window*

Me: *shut down Mac*

Me: *walk into ocean*