SEATTLE, WA – A confrontation between patient Joshua Lairns and his physician, Dr. Paula Renhart, reached a boiling point outside Mercy West Hospital on Sunday morning after he woke up suffering from symptoms of improved health.

“It’s unbelievable!” contested Mr. Lairns, as he shoved an elderly patient off a scale to measure his own weight. “Just because someone passes out in their bathroom from Ibuprofen poisoning does NOT mean that they want all their ailments remedied without their consent.”

Dr. Renhart remains adamant that she administered the best treatment possible after a neighbor called 911 and is therefore not at fault: “I’m bound by law to give medical aid to my patients, and he never filed a Do Not Make Well order. This was the perfect opportunity to give my patient proper care, and I did.”

Reporters caught up to Mr. Lairns while he was having his blood pressure taken at a Wal-Greens down the street from Mercy West and asked how he would respond to allegations of hypochondriasis. “It’s abthurd,” he said, his mouth full of cough drops. “They don’t listhen to me, they do what they ‘think is besth’ even when it’s clearly killing me.”

Along with his lawsuit, he filed paperwork to start his freshly-inspired relief program for those who have been “Medically Over-Remedied Or Nearly So,” the MORONS Foundation, and is extremely anxious to have it begin. It will match victims of exemplary medical care with exotic parasites donated by medical research facilities, in the hopes that none of his fellow health-proactives will have to endure “the atrocities he’s been put through.”