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We’ve all been there before. Pounding hearts, sweating palms or foreheads, dry lips, quivering hands, and /or shaky legs. Okay, maybe that is a slight exaggeration but you get the gist. Social situations tend to arouse in us a kind of anxiety that tests our confidence. Some of us have learnt how to deal with the social anxiety and are more self-assured in social situations, and some of us, not so much.

In this post, we will talk about different ways to exude confidence in social situations. Better yet, the more you put these tips into practice, the more natural it becomes, and soon enough, you find yourself appearing confident without having to work at it. Remember,Â practice makes perfect. Let’s get started.

DressÂ for the occasion

Look the part. If it is a formal event, then wear formal clothes. If it is an engagement party, casual wearÂ works great and if it is your best friends party, then look like you are going to a party and not like you are going to an interview. This is important. You don’t want to be too overdressed for a party or too underdressed for a formal event. The way you dress is going to determine how confident you feel about yourself at the event. Can you imagine how awkward it would be for you and everyone else if you showed up to a formal event in a t-shirt, ripped jeans and flip-flops? (Gasp!) I can’t even begin to describe the embarrassment.

Also, make sure you are comfortable with what you are wearing. If you are not comfortable in high heels, find an appropriate alternative.

Get enough rest before the event

Now, I understand that someÂ events come up abruptly and there is not enough time to prepare. But for the most part, invitations to any event are sent out at least three days prior to the event. Being well rested ensures that you have enough energy to handle the events and happenings of a social situation. This way, you appear self-assured and self-confident. You don’t want to be the grumpy person who can’t even hold a conversation with anyone because she/he is too tired.

Establish and maintain eye contact

Several studies have shown that people who establish and maintain eye contact are perceived as more confident, dominant, powerful, honest and warm. There is a difference however between staring and maintaining eye contact. Staring is creepy. It makes you look like a predator.

To make it less awkward, incorporate someÂ body language or facial expressions when making eye contact. This could be a nod of your head to agree with something or a subtle smile. There is a lot that goes into making eye contact the right way, most of which you will learn through experience. But one very important detail is timing.Â You can look away every 5 seconds (about the time it takes to complete a sentence), but don’t look down (as this shows lack of confidence), look to the side. And when you break the gaze, it should only be for a second. Do this naturally, don’t count the seconds in your head when you should be listening to what the other person is saying.

Smile

Smiling has been known to make people feel better. So, if you are a little nervous, smile.

Smiling also makes you look approachable and more confident. Just make sure you are smiling at the right time. This should be natural.Â Again, just like there’s a creepy way to make eye contact, there is also a creepy way to smile.

Have good posture

Stand or sit up straight. Slouching and drooping your shoulders makes you look lazy, defeated, and exhausted.

People with good sitting or standing postures appear more self-assured and confident. Please note that good standing posture does not mean standing straight with your feet close together and your hands stiff by your sides. You are not a flagpole. Movement of arms and hands is allowed.

A tip for good posture: Square your shoulders, lift your chest and hold your head high.

Watch your body language

Non-verbal communication is very important. It says everything you are not saying using words. It expresses your attitude towards the topic of discussion, speaker or general atmosphere. For example, folding your hands shows indifference or disinterest. Breaking a gaze too often shows you are anxious or uncomfortable. Mirroring a person’s actions shows that you are truly interested and listening to what they are saying. An example of mirroring would be, crossing your legs and leaning back in your chair when the other person does so.

Your body language can also show a level of confidence. A person who is looking down and has their hands in their pocket half the time does not look as confident as a person who is maintaining eye contact and using appropriate hand gestures.

Mingle

Even if you just know one person in the entire event does not mean that you shouldn’t talk to other people. Mingling and talking to other people shows a level of comfort in your social skills and makes you appear more confident. Standing there all by yourself when your friend leaves you does not show any confidence on your part. You may not feel comfortable talking to total strangers but just try it. If it does not work out great, you can always move on to another person. And this is a good way to network and make new friends.

Contribute to conversations

You may not be the greatest conversationalist in the world, but surely, you do have some opinions right? Sharing your opinions shows a level of confidence. It shows you have confidence in what you think and in your opinions about that particular topic.

Even if you don’t think you have much to say, just speak up. Chances are, even those you are speaking with, did not feel like sharing their opinions at first. Who knows, maybe what you say will change someone’s perspective on something.

Engage and have fun

When you engage in an activity, conversation or discussion, try as much as possible not to look at it as a chore. Have fun with it. Enjoy yourself. When you are having fun, you tend to loosen up and be your authentic self. And you stop worrying about things that could go wrong. When you worry less, you appear more confident because you are totally in the moment.

I hope these tips were helpful. Practice them on a regular basis and soon, they will be natural to you.

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