I was eating a pop tart in the break room before work when one of my coworkers came in and said, “Ooh, that’s not healthy for baby.” No good morning. Nothing.

If her goal was to get me to eat healthier it didn’t work. All her comment did was make me want to eat pop tarts every morning out of spite.

Even when people tell me to do things that are good ideas I don’t like to do them. I like to do good ideas that I came up with myself. Sometimes I’ll have plans to do a really smart thing but then someone else will tell me to do it and then I won’t want to do it anymore, because I don’t want it to the look like they came up with it.

I ate pretty healthy even before I was pregnant and now I eat even healthier. I didn’t used to eat breakfast and for the first few months of my pregnancy I didn’t either because of morning sickness, but I didn’t get called out for that. I stop skipping the most important meal of the day and that’s when I get judged.

My coworker did not know that I’m having gallbladder issues which means I’m supposed to avoid fatty foods and eat smaller meals. So basically I have to do the type of things people do to lose weight, while I’m supposed to be gaining a pound a week. Pop tarts are not super healthy, but they’re not fatty enough to make my gallbladder hurt and they have lots of calories.

People have pointed out that I have not gained much weight yet considering how pregnant I am. This is true. Overall I have not gained any weight. I lost ten pounds the first trimester from being nauseous and not drinking beer. I’ve finally gained back those ten pounds.

Technically I found out I was having gallbladder issues the week after I got judged for eating pop tarts, but I feel extra justified in my occasional breakfast choice now.

Plus I found out later I was low on iron and pop tarts have 10% iron! I should have been eating more pop tarts. Not less.

And look at the Riboflavin! And Calcium! And Vitamin A! And other things I don’t know what they do.

Plus pop tarts are way healthier than smoking or drinking or eating lunch meat; three things I have not done at all but no one is giving me high fives for that.

I don’t know if this is true but I imagine it’s good for fetuses to get to experience a realistic diet. He’s not going to be raised by vegans. I love fruits and vegetables, probably more than most people, but I also eat most things. I grew up with unlimited access to a drawer full of candy and still my favorite thing to eat growing up was peapods.

I have put a lot of thought into my diet and I plan to continue eating pop tarts at the same rate I have been. (I am not being paid by pop tarts for this article.)