Interested in the process of writing for comics? Here's the full script for the SILVER SURFER short story, "Girl On Board", and a link to read the finished comic for FREE.



POINT ONE 2014

SILVER SURFER

“Girl On Board”

Script for 10 pgs

Dan Slott

6/6/13



Mike!

Here we go, sir! This is a short story for the Marvel Point One Special that comes out two months before our official first issue. Instead of a prelude to SILVER SURFER, we’re going to treat this issue like a Baskin Robbins’ “pink spoon”—a taste of things to come.

In the space of 10 pages we’re going to show readers what the book’s about, our new take, and how AWESOME you’re gonna make it look! :)



The 5 Biggest Beats we’re going to hit:



• An introduction to Dawn, our big, new character. Really letting readers get a feel for her and Norrin’s chemistry with each other.



• Showing that the Surfer’s Board is a character too—like Carpet in Disney’s ALADDIN. (We’re still keeping his “name” a secret till we hit that moment in SURFER #2 or #3).



• The Surfer’s new ability to “Silver Down” and experience things again as Norrin Radd.



• The terrible-terrible tease that the Surfer hasn’t told Dawn everything about his past. She has NO idea about Galactus or how Norrin served him as his Herald.



• And the promise that once we head out into space—we are going to explore ALL-NEW sections of the Marvel Universe and witness things Marvelites have NEVER seen before!



For this short story…

We’re going to an all-new Marvel planet that you get to design.

NAUTIKOS is an ocean planet with floating cities, ship-like structures for buildings, and canals for streets. Its technology is very Steampunk, but with a boat-like/nautical flare.

The NAUTIKANS are humanoid animal hybrids—anthropomorphized sea creatures: dolphins, seals, otters, squid, whales, sharks, etc. Anything you want. Have fun! (But no rays or manta rays, please. You’ll see why later.)



Quick note:

I don’t usually write full script. So please think of this as placeholder dialogue if that helps. Lines will probably get tweaked in the final draft.



Ready?!!

SURF’S UP! :-D



PAGE 1

Panel One (long horizontal panel along the top).

The top page of a journal, as written (or typed) by Dawn. This could be a handwritten note. Or a black panel with a simple white font. Or something of your own design. It’s entirely up to you.



TEXT: That time Norrin punched a shark.





Panel Two

The Silver Surfer and Dawn are flying through the upper atmosphere of the ocean world of Nautikos. They zip through the air-traffic of anti-gravity schooners, submarine-spaceships, and rocket-propelled tugboats.



DAWN: Surfer? Where are we this time?

SURFER: The ocean world of Nautikos. If I timed it right, Dawn, you should be in for a treat.

SURFER: I believe tonight’s their millennial Festival of Lights.





Panel Three

Closer in on the two of them, favoring DAWN. This is our first good look at our all-new cast member.



SURFER: The entire sky will be filled with cosmic rays. It’s quite spectacular.

DAWN: Cool. So kinda like the Northern Lights? On Earth?

SURFER: No. It’s not like anything on Earth.





Panel Four

The Surfer and Dawn come in for a landing. For Dawn this is all still incredibly new—and she marvels at seeing an all-new, alien world—and even the act of coming in for a landing on a flying silver surfboard is something special.

On the canalled streets below, anthropomorphized sea creatures are walking around, dressed in clothes (dolphins, squid, seals, etc.). Some of them are pointing up at the Surfer. (Feel free to change the species of any of the creatures. But I’d like to keep the last one as an old tortoise man-or-woman. Someone who would have been around for the LAST millennial Festival of Lights.)



DAWN: Yeah. I kinda get that feeling when I’m with you.

DAWN: A lot.

SQUID-MAN: Look! It’s him. The Herald.

SEAL-WOMAN: Don’t stare.

DOLPHIN-WOMAN: What’s the Herald doing here?

OLD WRINKLEY TORTOISE MAN WITH GLASSES: Shush.



PAGE 2

Panel One

The board hovers above the ground. It’s high enough for the Surfer to offer Dawn his hand, like she’s coming off a step.

Close by, Nautikans are now whispering about the Surfer. And Dawn is confused by the bits and pieces that she can hear.



DOLPHIN-WOMAN: But why is he—?

TORTOISE MAN: The Herald is here like everyone else. To see the festival. Again.

DAWN (whisper to SURFER): I thought your name was “Norrin.”

SURFER: It is.

DAWN (whisper to SURFER): Then why do they keep calling you “Harold?”





Panel Two

Close up on the Surfer, favoring his hard-to-read, pupil-less, Kirby-esque eyes. Dawn has no knowledge of the Surfer’s past, and he’d like to keep it that way.



SURFER: It’s… nothing.





Panel Three

With his Board tucked under his arm, the Surfer leads Dawn into a side alley of the canalled city. He’s getting away from the people on the street and all of the unwanted attention.



SURFER: Here. We should make ourselves less conspicuous.

SURFER: It’s probably best if I…





Panel Four

In a Shazam-like moment, the Surfer draws his Power Cosmic inside himself—and transforms into Norrin Radd. In a rush of Kirby-Krackle, his silver shell slides away—with some of it morphing into yellow & green street clothes (a new design, but reminiscent of what Norrin Radd wore in SILVER SURFER #1 during his origin issue).

Dawn is in the shot, but the focus is clearly on Norrin and the coolness of this big visual. Dawn’s seen this before—but it’s still neat to her. During this sequence, the Surfer should not be holding onto the Board, because we don’t want the reader to feel as if the “silver” has gone into it. The “silver” is inside Norrin, and something he can call back up—as easily as Wolverine can pop out his claws.



SURFER: …SILVER DOWN.





PAGE 3

Panel One

Still in the alleyway, Norrin is ordering the Board to stay, like he would a puppy. But the Board clearly wants to come with him. (This is the one panel where we really see the board ‘act’ like a character and not a prop.)

In the background DAWN is giggling to herself.



NORRIN: Board, stay here. No. Stay. Stayyyy.

DAWN: *snort*





Panel Two

NORRIN: What?

DAWN: “Harold.”

NORRIN: Let it go.

DAWN: It’s not that. It’s just… “Harry” would be a terrible name for you.

NORRIN: Why?

DAWN: You’re bald.





Panel Three

Dawn is embarrassed that she said that out loud. She tries to backpedal. Norrin gets a little proud and defiant. Just a little. Nothing over the top.



DAWN: No. It’s a good look for you.

NORRIN: Dawn, I wield the Power Cosmic. I can grow hair if I wanted to.

NORRIN: I can do anything.





Panel Four

Match shot. The two of them just look at each other in silence.



Panel Five

Match shot.



DAWN: You’re trying to do it now, aren’t you?



The Surfer isn’t saying anything because she’s right. He was trying to grow hair.





Panel Six

Norrin takes Dawn by the hand and takes her back towards the street. Dawn calls back to the Board as she goes.



NORRIN: Come on. We’re going to be late.

DAWN: We’ll be right back. And we’ll bring you back something!



PAGE 4

Panel One (Big, Glorious, Ginormous Panel)

In a big outdoor plaza, in the middle of the canalled city, Norrin and Dawn are seated at one of a number of small tables—along with dozens of Nautikans—at the perfect viewing spot for the Nautikan Festival of Lights.

It doesn’t matter how tiny the crowd below is—just enough that we can make out Norrin and Dawn. (You might want to seed the other characters who appear later in this shot—but that’s not all that important.)

The REAL focus of the page is the night sky of Nautikos. It’s filled with luminescent manta rays. Not anthropomorphized manta rays. Real manta rays—but from an alien world where manta rays are can fly—and are bioluminescent. As they soar through the night sky they leave neon trails of color—of EVERY color! It’s a cosmic rave! The greatest light show in the Universe!

(PAGES 4 through 8 all take place during the Festival of Lights and all have this crazy, cosmic rave style of lighting.)



DAWN: Cosmic rays.





Panel Two

Close up on Dawn and Norrin, their faces lit up in a number of different neon colors. Dawn is in a state of complete awe and wonder. Norrin is content and at peace.



DAWN: I thought you meant rays of light not—

DAWN: This—this is crazy. And glorious. And…





Panel Three

Match shot of Dawn. Except now her eyes are welling up. It’s the most impressive sight she’s ever witnessed. Norrin has turned his head to look at her. She doesn’t notice him doing this because she’s so focused on the light show.

Norrin’s seen it before though. A millennium ago. What he’s enjoying is seeing Dawn’s reaction to it.



DAWN: And you’re right. It’s more beautiful than anything on Earth.

NORRIN: I never said that.



Is he about to tell her that she’s beautiful? We’ll never know. Because a voice from off panel interrupts the moment.



CAP’N SHARRR (BURST/from off panel): LISTEN UP all a’ you dry-skinned top-siders!





PAGE 5

Panel One

We pull back to see CAP’N SHARRR (a Shark-Man who’s also a pirate) and two of his powerful looking flunkies, a Killer Whale-Man and a Walrus-Man (with very dangerous looking tusks).

All three of them are decked out in powerful mecha-battle suits, with pirate skull-&-crossbone insignias painted on the sides.

They’ve just kicked over a bunch of the tables and knocked some of the festival’s spectators onto the ground. With space-age flintlock laser guns they’re sticking up everyone at the plaza. (If you want, their pirate schooner vessel could be docked in the canal in the background.)



CAP’N SHARRR: Dunno if anyone toldja, but there’s a price to see the show on my docks.

CAP’N SHARRR: An’ this’s where ya pay up, sand-huggers!

CAP’N SHARRR: Give us yer pearls, yer gold, yer beads an’ baubles! Or give us yer heads!



Panel Two

Close up on Norrin (with a slight, knowing scowl) as he puts his fingers in his mouth to whistle.



SFX: Fwheet!



Panel Three

Cut to the alley where they left the Board. The Board perks up like an attentive dog at the far away sound of Norrin’s call.



Panel Four

And then the Board zips off, heading for his master…



Panel Five

NORRIN gets up from his seat as CAP’N SKARR approaches, his flintlock laser raised. DAWN knows that something is about to go down.

At nearby tables we can see other humanoid sea-creatures who’ve been watching the show. They’re clearly afraid of the pirates who’ve come to rob them.

At the closest table are some adorable (though now terrified) Otter-Children.



CAP’N SHARRR: What have we here? A mouth-breather! You must’ve traveled far in some fancy wee ship.

CAP’N SHARRR: Ya can afford that, ya can afford to pay me everything ya got in yer pockets!

NORRIN: Won’t be a problem. You’ll find they’re lined with…





PAGE 6

Panel One

Everyone (except Dawn) is amazed to see Norrin “SILVER UP” and transform back into the SILVER SURFER! (If we can see Dawn, she’s rolling her eyes at Norrin’s corny attempt at a catch phrase.)



SURFER: …SILVER!



Panel Two

The transformation complete, the SILVER SURFER punches out CAP’N SKARRR with a cosmic-powered punch. (The punch has a trail of energy, like a cosmic-powered version of Iron Fist).



SFX: K-POW!

CAP’N SHARRR: ARRH!



Panel Three

Cap’n Sharrr’s flunkies open fire with their flintlock lasers—some of their shots reflecting off of the Surfer! Other shots going into the crowd!



Panel Four

DAWN dives for the nearby Otter-Children gathering them in her arms and using her body as a shield. She doesn’t even know these poor, little, alien children, but she’s ready to put her life on the line to save them.

Lasers are flying all around them…







PAGE 7

Panel One

…but before a random shot can hit her (and the kids)… The Board comes zooming in from off frame…



Panel Two

…and acts as a shield/cover for Dawn and the children. Laser fire ricochets off of the Board. It’s good it got there when it did!

Dawn smiles and looks back at it.



DAWN: Good board!



Panel Three

The Surfer, grabbing Cap’n Sharrr and swinging him around like a club, knocks out the two flunkies—but in doing so, one of them shoots a laser shot straight up and it hits one of the Cosmic Manta Rays.



Panel Four

Aspect shot of the Cosmic Manta Ray falling onto the ground and flopping on the floor. It’s hurt and wounded.







PAGE 8

Panel One

Dawn stops hugging/protecting the little Otter-Children and checks to make sure they’re all right.



DAWN: It’s okay. There’s nothing to worry about. The Surfer saved us. See?



Panel Two

Match shot as the Otter-Children are still scared. But not from the pirates. They’re scared of the Surfer.



OTTER-CHILD #1 (small): It’s the Herald.

OTTER-CHILD #2 (small): The Herald’s here.



Panel Three

A skeptical DAWN looks over towards the Surfer. For the life of her, she can’t figure out why everyone is freaking out about him. He’s a super hero. And, from everything she’s seen when she’s around him, he’s the kindest soul she’s ever known…

In the background, the Surfer kneels down by the fallen Cosmic Manta Ray…



Panel Four

Close up as the Surfer lays a hand on the fallen Cosmic Manta Ray… and uses his Cosmic Power to heal it.



Panel Five

Dawn watches knowingly as the Surfer releases the Cosmic Manta Ray back up to rest of the school of Manta Rays flying in the sky. It’s like watching someone release a once wounded bird and watching it fly off.

The Surfer is pleased by this. And seeing the joy in this moment, Dawn sees everything she has to—to know that the people of Nautikos are crazy. Her friend is a good and kind soul—and not someone to be feared.





PAGE 9

Panel One

Dawn and the Board head over to the Surfer. Dawn says she’s ready to go. In a reverse from the PAGE 2, Panel One, Dawn is on the Board offering the Surfer a hand up—like he’s getting help going onto a step.



DAWN: Come on. Let’s go.

SURFER: But the festival isn’t over yet.

DAWN: It’s okay. I’ve seen everything I need to here. And besides…



Panel Two

The two of them, on the Board, fly off-- passing through the school of luminescent Manta Rays.



DAWN: …you’ve seen it before.

SURFER: Well, yes. A thousand years ago. I thought you’d like it.

DAWN: Oh, I did. But… Well…



Panel Three

The two of them fly over the night sky of Nautikos, its moon high above them. (We’re not in Space yet. Not until the last page.)



DAWN: It’s like whenever one of your friends wants to show you their favorite movie…

DAWN: …and it’s great and all, but…

DAWN: …you’d rather see something new. With them. So you can see it for the first time together.



Panel Four

DAWN: I guess what I’m asking is…

DAWN: …is there anywhere in the universe you haven’t been?

SURFER: Dawn, the Universe is infinite and ever expanding. Of course there are places I haven’t been.

DAWN: Where?



Panel Five

The Surfer points to a direction in the sky. And Dawn looks towards that direction, smiling.



SURFER: There.

DAWN: That way?

SURFER: That way.

DAWN: Okay. Let’s go… that way.





PAGE 10

SPLASH PAGE

For the first time we see Dawn and the Silver Surfer flying through SPACE. They’re zooming straight towards the reader—Surfer with his arms outstretched—Dawn holding on and excited to see what’s coming next.

End on the story title and credits.



TITLE: Girl On Board



Here’s a link where you can read the finished version of this story for FREE:

https://comicstore.marvel.com/Silver-Surfer-Infinite-1/digital-comic/33712



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