If you have never been well-known enough to receive good and bad coverage from the media, consider yourself blessed. Because when the bad reviews start coming your way, it creates an avalanche of anguish for you, your children, and that inner core of your soul that is so vulnerable to hatred and the malignancy thrown at you from some of the most hateful people you will ever have the misfortune of knowing.

I do not want to get into the specifics of the precise stories that have hurt me, because I do not wish to lend any misguided or false credence to the coverage of myself or my family. Also, I am doing everything in my power to guard against any further malicious intrusions into my privacy and the privacy of my family. With that said, anyone who has been reading the news about me and my impending divorce to Alexis Bellino will probably know just what I am talking about.

Stories of this nature are difficult, painful, and if I’m being honest, they are numbing to the soul, which is a part of the self that should always be looking for the glory and the good in all things. My soul is suffering. I am in pain. I am in the midst of a divorce that involves 13 years of marriage and three innocent children. Call me naive, but I would have thought that these details would matter—but on the other hand, part of me knew this would get ugly—because that’s what most people want in their juicy gossip, especially when it comes to the kind of dish served up by reality TV.

Every daily update causes more personal pain for me, and there’s only so much I can do to shield my children, whose names have been brought up as part of this “news” story. Beyond this, all of the latest stories I see online are taking their toll on my physical and mental health.

I have been forced to seek professional help for physical and psychological ailments I’ve been experiencing since being dragged through the mud by Tamra and Shannon. The repercussions of this behavior from them and the coverage that it gets are literally harming every part of me.

Beyond this, my businesses have suffered, which has created hardship for myself, Alexis, and my children. I am, after all, a father who happens to own businesses, not an entrepreneur who happens to have children.

I wish I could close this blog post by saying something pithy or wise, something smart or insightful. But the truth is, I am working hard not to feel broken. I am at the mercy of people who do not know the real me, and that’s a scary and dangerous place to be. For those reading this that know what it’s like, forgive me for ever not taking it seriously. For those who have no idea what it’s like to be in the crosshairs of the harshest media outlets out there, just understand: I was marked as the “bad guy” from day one, so the fact that it’s gotten worse is kind of sadly miraculous.

I am doing the best I can with all of this—and all of this is a lot more than meets the eye.

– Jim Bellino