Even after being sent up to Capitol Hill and down again into the ignoble trenches of recovery, it was a great year for bankers: record revenues, salary increases, cute new nicknames from Matt Taibbi — it was almost like 2008 never even happened. The money kept flowing. Yet, for some of the denizens of Wall Street still small enough to fail, the cash kickbacks amounted to a new trend this bonus season: "the Zeros," or those supposedly snubbed of the bonuses they expected.

But you can't believe everything the Times tells you, even if the Street's biggest firms set aside more than the GDP of 13 entire countries (see left). You believe the people. So we went to the financial district late last week asking every banker we could find — at the bars, on the street corners, out front of a steakhouse — to take a short, unscientific, yet revealing survey. Given guys like Morgan Stanley CEO James Gorman, who's promising to take any employees leaking bonus information to the media and escort them out of the building himself, it wasn't easy, but we still found 98 respondents (81 men and 17 women) who were willing to talk.

Here's what they told us.

1. Did you get a bonus this year?



• Of the 61% who said they received a bonus, 85% were men — and just 15% were women. And we really tried to talk to women.

2. Do you think it's fair?



Fun/depressing facts:

• Of everyone who didn't get a bonus, nobody thought they deserved less.

• Of everyone who didn't get a bonus, only one man and one woman thought it was fair.

• Despite being 6.75% more likely to receive a bonus, the men who didn't receive bonuses were 24 times more likely to think it was "unfair."

• Of the nine women who received bonuses, five thought they were fair, three thought they deserved more, one thought she deserved less. The average differences between women who thought their bonuses were fair, and women who thought theirs were unfair? $20,830.

• Four of the men who received bonuses refused to answer this question. The number of women who received bonuses, who also didn't answer? Zero.

• None of the women received above $150,000 in bonuses.

• Only two people thought they deserved less. The one man was in the highest bracket, making $250,000-plus. the woman in the second-highest bracket. His answer for what he's going to spend it on? "SAVINGS." Hers? "A big-ass Mac. And a lot of taxi cabs."

3. So what did you spend it on?



The Top Earners

Five out of the 98 people we surveyed made $250,000 on up. All five were men.

Two out of five of them thought their bonuses were fair. When asked what they'd spend it on, one answered "ME." The other answered "MY DAUGHTER." Two out of five of these men refused to answer whether or not they thought it was fair. When asked what they'd spend it on, one answered "APARTMENT." The other marked an "X" through the question. One out of five of these men thought he deserved more. When asked what he'd spend it on, he answered "STOCK." But, hey, at least one of the men who thought they deserved more drew this:

Only two other people drew their answers, an option given by the final question in our survey. One drew a wedding ring with the word "WIFE" next to it. The other (Ms. "Big-Ass Mac") drew an Apple monitor. She was one of the two people who thought they deserved less. Mac users, right? Meanwhile, some just took the opportunity to have a different kind of fun.

Answers Clearly Meant to Fk With Us

• "TAXES": A man who earned $75-$100K. He thought it was fair.

• "Charity": A man who earned $25-$50K. He thought he deserved more.

• "ME.": One of the five men who earned $250K on up. He thought it was fair.

• "nothing": A man who earned $75-$100K. He thought it was fair.

• "entertainment": A man who earned $75-$100K. He thought it was fair. (Our pollster also noted the "creepy smile" this person had as they wrote their answer.)

• Finally, the woman who earned $100-$150K (the highest bonus we surveyed for a woman) had some interesting "plans" for her bonus:

How'd she feel about her bonus take? "Fair."

David Shapiro contributed research and polling.

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