A long time ago, back when we first started compiling this dumb list of the Least Influential People on an annual basis , I told my editor that we should include Donald Trump on it. He protested, arguing that Trump was such a shameless attention whore that he didn't even deserve to be in the company of conventionally useless narcissists like Dennis Rodman. Eventually, we reached a compromise and created a "Hall Of Fame" category for the annually worthless, like Trump, Amanda Bynes, and Ted Nugent. Well now, you'll NEVER guess who saw what we wrote:

This man is now less than a month away from becoming President of the United States, and poised to deliver us into the same kind of sustained irrelevancy that he has mastered over the past three decades. I've already begun scouting real estate in Australia. I'm told schools there are affordable.

But Trump didn't ascend to the highest office in the land on his own now, did he? No, my man got a lot of help along the way from a number of boobs, liars, and hapless idiots. These are the people who added their own little secret ingredient to the hearty gumbo of American vapidity that gave us President Trump. Without them, the most ridiculous thing ever to happen never would have happened. So let us recall them all now. Meet your least influential people of 2016, which, I will remind you, are presented in no particular order, even though I know you have already forgotten that reminder, just as you have for the last six years.

2016 Getty Images

Anthony Weiner

You idiot. You breathtaking, unbelievable idiot. Don't even talk to us right now. Don't even look at us. You should just go lock yourself in the pantry and stay there until we tell you to come out, which will be never. Even Woody Allen was never this destructively horny. You asshole.

Billy Bush

This guy got $10 million to fuck off from Access Hollywood forever. We're now living in a world where Billy Bush is worth $10 million to someone. How is that possible? I could replace Billy Bush with a fern and get the exact same ratings. At least the fern wouldn't ask movie stars asinine questions about what it was like to work with Mandy Moore. And yet, consider the outcome for the two men involved in that pussy-grabbing video: Bush got $10 million, and Trump got elected president. We are so, so fucked.

2016 Getty Images

Cameron Crowe

He was on this list last year for Aloha, but did you know he made a TV show this year? You probably forgot all about Roadies, but I didn't. Perhaps you thought Vinyl was the nadir of shitty boomer music porn in 2016? Wrong! Look at this poster. Does ANYONE on that poster resemble an actual roadie to you? The average roadie weighs three bills and will spit on you if you get in the way of his rolling bass cabinet. Cameron Crowe should be banned for life from making any movie or TV show with a music theme. This is for his own good.

2016 Getty Images

Ryan Lochte

In lighter times, Lochte's colossal fuckup in Rio would be the story of the year, so to recap: He got trashed with his teammates, tried to go piss at a gas station, pissed ON that gas station, and then told people he was robbed at gunpoint after the fact. The best part is how he claims to have reacted to getting a gun pointed in his face (which, again, never happened):