MIDDLE class families have gathered around a tabloid newspaper that was put through their letter box without permission.

The families are staring at their free copy of The Sun, unsure what to do with it.

Matin Bishop, from Hatfield, told his wife and children: “Don’t touch it, I’m going to try and open it using this umbrella. Nice and easy, there we go. Now then…

“Lots of capital letters. Lots of words in bold. Big photographs. Short articles. And my goodness, what a lot of puns. Okay, right.

“Well, it’s not very nice but I don’t think it’s anything to be worried about. It’s just a newspaper for people who do not prioritise education in quite the same way as we do.”

Bishop added: “Emily, could you be a poppet, nip out to the garage and get my barbecue tongs and one of the green, heavy-duty binbags?”