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When Keon Raymond was growing up, he didn’t understand why his mother stayed with his abusive father. So one day, he asked her.

“My mom’s reason was she just wanted us to know who our father was,” said Raymond, a former Calgary Stampeder who’s now an advocate encouraging men to oppose violence against women.

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“She endured all those things over the years just so we knew who our father was. Which I couldn’t believe, but growing up in St. Louis, the majority of my friends didn’t have a father around.”

“I didn’t agree with it, but that was her reasoning,” he added. “Every woman has a different reason why they stay, what prevents them from leaving.”

Raymond told his story Wednesday at the 12th annual Breakfast with the Guys, a fundraiser for the Alberta Council of Women’s Shelters. The event aims to teach men what they can do to end violence against women, said ACWS executive director Jan Reimer.

“If men call out the behaviours of other men … you can de-escalate situations, you can have people understand this kind of behaviour is not OK,” she said.