(Picture: Ella Byworth for Metro.co.uk)

Look, there’s no ‘right’ answer to how often you should be having sex.

Sex is about desire and pleasure, not meeting quotas or making sure to tick it off your to-do list every other evening.

But sometimes it’s nice to get an idea of what’s ‘normal’.

How I Do It: Meet the mum-of-two who has sex all day, every day

There is no ‘normal’ really, but it can be helpful to get a sense of the average – if only so you can explain to your partner that there’s really nothing out of the ordinary of not being able to manage sex twice a day.


So look to this study from the Kinsey Institute for research in Sex, Reproduction, and Gender, which has recently been recirculated this week by Medical Daily.



Researchers had a look at the frequency at which people have sex in different age groups, to get a general average for each age.

As you’d probably expect, it’s the younger types who are at it like eager little sex bunnies… sort of.

People between 18 and 29 tend to have an average of 112 sex sessions per year, meaning twice a week. Not as often as some people may expect, hmm?

(Picture: Ella Byworth for metro.co.uk)

30 to 39 year olds, meanwhile, have sex 86 times a year on average, which equates to 1.6 times a week, while those in the 40 to 49 category have sex 69 (nice) times a year.

The researchers didn’t study anyone older than 49, because researchers have a tendency to ignore the active sex lives of the older generation. Rude.

Regardless, the researchers believe the drop-off in sexual frequency is down the general grind of daily stresses catching up to us.

Average frequency of sex for different age groups: 18-29 year olds – Twice a week

30-39 year olds – 1.6 times a week

40-49 year olds – Less than once a week

In our youth, we’re not held back from getting it on by family, household duties, and overwhelming work schedules, while as we age, these pile up.

Our declining physical health doesn’t help either. We’re more likely to develop chronic illnesses and conditions as we get older, which tend to put a dampener on our sex lives.

The researchers did find, however, that marriage also plays a significant role in how much sex people are having, with 34% of married couples getting busy under the sheets two to three times a week, 45% banging a few times a month, and only 13th having sex only a few times a year. Not too shabby.

(Picture: Ella Byworth for Metro.co.uk)

But before you start shaming yourself for being seriously under the average, whatever your age group, take a breath.

As we mentioned, there really shouldn’t be a ‘should’ when it comes to your sex life – as long as you and your partner are happy with the amount of sex you’re having, you don’t need to be having any more or less.

Previous research has found that couples who have frequent sex tend to be happier, but ‘frequent’ is as much as once a week. People who have sex four times a week haven’t been shown to be any happier than the once a week brigade.



A sudden drop in sex drive is worth chatting about (it could be down to physical reasons, stress, or an issue in the relationship), but if your sex drive is on the lower side, that’s perfectly fine – you shouldn’t feel weird about it.

Chat with the person you’re seeing, make sure they’re comfortable with the amount of sex you’re having, and just ignore all the recommended weekly sex allowances or the idea that your mates are doing it constantly.

It doesn’t matter what everyone else is doing, really. It’s just about you two.

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