God loves us:

TEA PARTY CAUTION! DO NOT SIGN ANYTHING - FROM ANYONE - AT ANY TEA PARTY ANYWHERE IN THE USA —- NO EXCEPTIONS!Federally-funded ACORN operators will be at all Tea Parties to get signatures which they will give to Obama stating that the signatures are in support of his policies or to get the names of people who oppose his policies and report dissention. NO MATTER WHAT, DO NOT SIGN ANYTHING! IF YOU HAVE FRIENDS WHO PLAN TO ATTEND, WHO DO NOT HAVE EMAIL, GET ON THE PHONE TO WARN THEM. TRY TO CALL OR EMAIL RADIO TALK SHOWS AND LET THE CAT OUT OF THE BAG. PASS IT ON!

Yes, wingnut paranoia has jumped itself as it was already preparing to jump the shark. In their rush to outsmart the nonexistent, double-secret double agents (also!), the teabagging nutters are now warning one another not to fall for any dirty tricks like sharing basic contact information with one another, lest they be unwittingly included in petitions supporting administration positions, or (in their fevered dreams) be reported as dissidents!

Ah, me! The treacherous politics of teabagging!

Let me just state here and now that I wish I had thought of this myself. What could be better than watching wingnuts deny themselves the most basic of organizing tools purely out of their own paranoia?

This will doubtless be a crushing blow to actual organizers who were planning to mine these teabagging parties for signatures on petitions that actual teabaggers would actually support. But hey, you can't be too careful these days! Anyone who asks you for your support of anything while you're out teabagging it up is probably a commie, and you should be ready to scream, "Treason!" at the drop of a hat bag.

Remember that while you're out there claiming your place in the pantheon of patriots, calling to mind the brave colonists of old, it's crucial that you guard carefully against being persuaded to sign your name to any public declaration of your political independence. I promise you that the Founders will be smiling down upon your conservative prudence.