Hot hatchbacks, we're told, are supposed to be a little

raucous, edgy and brash in the name of cheap speed. The 2015 Mini John Cooper Works Hardtop is definitely hot—it's the quickest, most powerful car Mini has ever built—but it's a far more grownup car than Mini would have you believe.

As is the case across the rest of the seven-model Mini lineup, the JCW spec is the most high-performance, priciest box you can check on your Mini Hardtop order sheet. The 2.0-liter turbocharged inline-four is based on the 189-hp engine in the lesser Cooper S, but with a new, higher-boost turbo and different pistons. Output rises to 228 hp from 5200-6000 rpm, with 236 lb.-ft. of torque from 1250-4800 rpm. Power goes through your choice of six-speed transmission, either a decent-shifting manual with rev-matching on downshifts or an optional torque-converter Selectronic auto with paddle shifters, to a front differential blessed with electronic limited slip under the stability control's watchful eye.

Upgraded front brakes with big red Brembo calipers necessitate JCW-specific wheels with more positive offset, in turn requiring a small shelf-like extension to the Mini's fender flares. A new front bumper, rear lower valence, side sills, and rear spoiler all provide aerodynamic benefits, Mini says, aiding stability right up to the JCW's claimed 153-mph top speed. An optional suspension package gives the JCW electronically-controlled dampers with comfort and sport modes.

And Mini endeavored to give the latest JCW a dose of personality to go with its uprated hardware. The three drive modes—Eco, Mid, and Sport, summoned by toggling the ring at the base of the shift boot—tweak the electric-assist steering firmness, throttle response, exhaust note, and if

equipped, damper settings. Each mode briefly flashes a cartoon message on the central display; Sport mode's billboard shouts "Let's motor HARD," as a wire-frame illustration of a Mini daydreams of rockets and go karts in comic-strip thought bubbles.

But once you get driving—er, motoring, that is—the sensation is more shrunken sport sedan than rambunctious hot hatch. The 2.0-liter engine has a fat, tractable midrange that feels more like a product of displacement than turbocharging, an illusion furthered by the near-absence of turbo noise in the stereo-amplified engine note. Slight nudges of torque-steer only really become apparent on choppy pavement, and Mini says the new JCW will sprint to 60 in 5.9 seconds with the automatic, 6.1 with the

manual, though we've yet to verify those times.

The introduction of the newest JCW took us along Connecticut back roads, through a parking lot autocross course, and on a few brief laps of the tight, technical road course at Wilzig Manor. I also spent a week driving the JCW on my hellish Manhattan commute, running errands, and on

at least one city-madness-induced highway blast into the hills of New Jersey.

The Mini always felt politely composed. On the road, turn in is brisk, though there is the slightest delay between steering input and front tire reaction. On the autocross and road course a habit of slight understeer made itself known at the very limit, responding nicely to a little throttle. In Sport mode, the optional electronically-controlled dampers telegraph smaller road imperfections that aren't picked up in Mid or Eco modes, but body movements stay pretty well controlled no matter where the toggle's set. The brakes hauled off speed authoritatively, though with a slightly spongier pedal feel than you'd expect from the hardware at the other end of the hoses.

In fact, if you stripped away the charming-but-slightly-cheesy hot hatch trappings—the footwell mood lighting, the hood stripes, the engine management-provided exhaust burbles on throttle lift in Sport mode—you'd swear you were driving an "entry-premium" sport sedan of some sort.

This is perhaps not terribly surprising given Mini's BMW ownership. It's also not out of line with the sticker price on the JCW I spent most of my time with: a guffaw-inducing $41,800, loaded down with nearly every luxury option from 18-inch wheels to big, swoopy leather sport seats to a perplexingly unnecessary back-up camera with proximity sensors. (The JCW's base price, $30,600, represents only a $500 increase over the 2013 JCW, and a minimally-optioned version without the glass panorama sunroof and other baubles felt ever-so-slightly lighter and sharper)

The hot hatch market seems fascinated by gimmicks. Witness the Fiat 500 Abarth's comically loud exhaust, or the Ford Focus ST's forearm-taxing torque. Mini's no stranger to cloying charm (have you seen the dashboards in

these things?), and the JCW delivers on all the things Mini assumes fast

hatchback buyers want: wide-mouthed air intakes, jutting spoilers, a raspier engine note when you request it.

In other turbo hatchbacks, these quirks of personality are built-in. The Fiat's shouty exhaust only has one volume; the Focus ST's engine only has one mode; The Fiesta ST, today's platonic ideal of an affordable quick hatchback, has an interior and an option list constrained by its price. The 2015 Mini John Cooper Works Hardtop tries to emulate that cheap-speed playfulness, and to varying degrees it succeeds. But strip away the artifice, and what you've got is a quick, solid-feeling machine that's a bit more grown-up than its stripes and spoilers suggest.

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