Ryan Lochte may be focused on his comeback story, but the emotional scars stemming from the 2016 Olympics remain.

Appearing on HBO’s “Real Sports with Bryant Gumbel,” airing Tuesday at 11 p.m., the 35-year-old Olympian reflected on the fallout from the scandal in Rio, in which he and three teammates were accused of embellishing a tale about being robbed at gunpoint.

“There was points where, if I went to sleep and I never woke up again I’d be fine,” Lochte said. “If I just disappeared, it would be okay.”

Though the swimmer previously opened up about how the international incident affected him emotionally, Lochte’s wife, Kayla Rae Reid, also recalled a change in his demeanor.

“Someone that has all this energy and drive and just to be completely squashed, like that,” she said.

With the 2020 Tokyo games on his radar, Lochte, who has also struggled with alcohol, stated earlier this summer that his family is his motivation going forward.

“I go home and get to play with my kids and kiss and hold my wife. And that to me is everything,” Lochte said of son Caiden, 2, and daughter Liv, who was born in June.