Capt. Jonathan: Stardate: [Stardate Unavailable – Q has put this Stardate on trial for the crimes of all Stardates] How many questions spring from the first episode of TNG? (1) Why does McCoy’s cameo make me tear up every. Single. Time? (2) Does Picard test every new person he meets by making them manually dock a battle bridge? (3) Has O’Brien really been on TREK *that* long? (4) Skirts? (5) Even on the dudes? (6) Why didn’t they just put them on the Space Jellyfish, too?

I mean, seriously:

Capt. Tracy: But Q! Q! Q! The Grand InQuisitor! I’d like to think that my 2002 self, who nicknamed my precious kitten Q, somehow knew that one day I would fall for this ST:TNG character. I love his audacity and entitlement. I also love how, again (just like in “All Good Things . . .”) he serves as the avatar for the audience. This premiere is saddled with the substantial legacy of ST:TOS, and rather than ignore that, this premiere embraces it. Through judging “the human race,” Q is really judging this re-boot. Will it be worthwhile? Will it correct the unsettling assumptions of the first series? Q is watching.

Capt. Jonathan: I love the moment where Riker beams aboard the Battle Bridge for the first time (about midway through the episode), and Yar is like, “Hey, we’ve seen some crazy shit – you should check it out on this mini-viewscreen!” So she sits Riker in a corner of the Bridge to watch basically a clipshow of the episode thus far where he sees Q hold Picard & Co. accountable for the crimes of humanity.

And Yar never seems to realize that there’s another guy on that Bridge who’s also never (presumably) seen or heard any of this before, either:

But who cares about O’Brien?

Capt. Tracy: It did do a lot to introduce us to the rest of the crew, though. I mean:

I never knew that Commander Reading Rainbow suffered constant pain in order to gain a measure of sight. This is an interesting ableist commentary, methinks.

My girlcrush on Counselor Troi only grows. Though I’m baffled by her bizarre accent (is she Scottish?), her role is important from the outset–interiority and emotional health is unapologetically valued on this series.

It seems totally fitting that we first meet Commander Crotch at a station dominated by a huge phallic symbol.

Not to mention BONES IS HERE. I don’t know if DeForest Kelley’s appearance is an availability thing or what, but McCoy was the id, the soul, of TOS, and for that reason his tacit approval of this series is more poignant than even the great Shatnoy’s.

As to the villains, I have to admit, I’m not sure what Groppler Zorn’s role was, but I appreciate how he looked exactly like Xenophilius Lovegood.

Capt. Jonathan: It’s the best pilot TNG could’ve asked for. You’ve got the superiority complex of Q at odds with the generosity of the Enterprise crew. We can echo complaints about the remnants of TOS that trickled in here and there, but that just meant the series had room to grow. And it did.

Capt. Tracy: This episode did a great job of establishing the ethos of TNG–Celebrating life and connection at all costs. Engage!

And now, a little Relationship Q&A:

Capt. Jonathan: Q: What new relationship strategy does this episode make you want to try?

A: Tentacle Hentai!

Capt. Tracy: Q: Would you rather your partner wear a TNG man-kilt or a Wesley Crusher Cosby Sweater?

A: Can I just be blind like LaReading Rainbow?