MIAMI—Saying that the recently released Wells report on patterns of harassment within the Miami Dolphins locker room “doesn’t tell the whole story,” offensive lineman Richie Incognito expressed disappointment to reporters Wednesday that the 144-page account left out the best stuff he did to former teammate Jonathan Martin. “I was hoping that this would finally set the record straight on all the great shit I did to that Jmart loser, but it doesn’t even come close,” said Incognito, claiming that the independent report’s detailed descriptions of the racial slurs, homophobic taunts, and personal threats he directed toward Martin failed to do justice to the extent of his “totally hilarious” abuse. “I mean, I read the entire report, and they didn’t even mention the time I pissed in his Gatorade cup and then watched him drink it. And how about what me and [teammate Mike] Pouncey did to him while he was sleeping on that flight? Whoever wrote this garbage just wasn’t paying attention.” Incognito added that in order to “clear this whole thing up,” he was in the process of writing up a 680-page addendum to the Wells report that he hopes to release to the public later this week.

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