NEW YORK—Emphasizing the company’s commitment to providing a sustainable work–life balance, Optech CEO Mark Billings told reporters Tuesday that he encourages employees to take short mental breakdowns for every hour of work. “Every 60 minutes, we want our staff to feel free to take a walk around the block for a quick hyperventilating session when they need to,” said Billings, noting that the company has provided several private and comfortable spaces where employees can go throughout the day to curl their bodies into a tight little ball under the conference table and cry their eyes out. “Work really suffers when people aren’t regularly allowed to walk away from their desks and take a few moments to have a total panic attack. Staff shouldn’t be confined to using brief bathroom visits or lunchtime to freak the fuck out.” Billings added that as long as employees don’t take more than 10 to 15 minutes for their short bursts of existential crises, it actually increases the company’s productivity.

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