Most runners I know who are not also liars acknowledge that running sucks much (okay, most) of the time. Usually, I deal with how much I hate it by complaining about it to people who really, truly do not care. But one San Francisco woman has channeled that love-hate relationship into something beautiful: using the latest in satellite-enabled exercise tracking technology and her own running feet to draw pictures of dicks.


The American hero behind Running Drawing is San Franciscan Claire Wyckoff. To be fair, some of Wykoff's Nike+ drawings are not dicks — she recently made an Atari Space Invaders character and an extended middle finger, for example — but most of them are. Dicks of all sizes. Fat dicks, skinny dicks. Dicks who climb on rocks.

Over at Uproxx, Stacey Ritzen is pretty jazzed (jizzed? Oh, god. I'm sorry) about what Wykoff's been up to, and thinks it could have beautiful ramifications for future road race course designs. She writes,

The possibilities are endless. Dick 5Ks? Cock and Balls Half Marathons? PENIS-SHAPED MEDALS? As both a runner and purveyor of fine dick humor, my head is absolutely spinning with the possibilities.


Two takeaways here: first, this is literally the only reason I'd ever use Nike+. And second, I think I want to marry Claire Wyckoff.