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It is the year 2043. Lots of things have changed since 2018, when you are reading this. Nations have fallen. Nuclear missiles have been launched. AI is threatening a hostile takeover.

But one thing hasn’t changed: Disney is still releasing Star Wars spinoffs. You already know about the Han Solo movie, the Boba Fett movie, and the Obi-Wan movie. There is lots more to come. We have countless Star Wars TV shows, Star Wars video games, Star Wars reality shows, and of course, Star Wars films.

We only have time to send you one message from the future. We’re sending this, the complete list of Star Wars spinoffs as of 2043, for one reason: Disney must be stopped. We can deal with radiation poisoning and civilizational threat. But we cannot take one more spinoff. Please hel—

***CURRENT LIST. SEND TO 2018. REQUEST HELP*** How it’s made: Sebulba’s podracer Jango Fett Origins Live At Jabba’s Palace with the Max Rebo Band Bossk Baby Cooking Light with Dexter Jettster Slave I Episode III: Slave III Rogue Two Hundred and Twenty One Sarlacc Pit Digestion: The galaxy’s only 1,000-year reality show Three Mandalorians and a Bantha Cornelius Evazan: A Star Wars Story of the guy who got his arm cut off in the cantina on Tatooine The Good, The Bad & The Unkar Plutt Who Shot First? Fox News debates everything Star Wars Pimp My Incom-FreiTek T-70 X-Wing Kylo Ren’s Mask, The Animated Series The Comedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise Jek Tono Porkins: A Star Wars Story The Rancor Tank with Mark Cuban Jr. CSI: Corellia Baby Watto BBC x Star Wars—Planet Earth: The Wildlife of Kashyyyk (narrated by David Attenborough’s head) Tastes of the Outer Rim: Blue milk cheese on Tatooine (and other galactic delicacies) A Quarter Portion of My Heart: Unkar Plutt’s Songs of Romance Wheel of Bib Fortuna Walker: Tusken Raider Before He Was Admiral: Private Akbar Before He Was Private: Akbar goes to high school It’s a Tart!: In the kitchen with Admiral Akbar Star Wars Episode XXX: Leave the kids at home A Scarf For All Seasons: A Lando Calrissian story Cute Ewoks, Season 18 Cute Porgs, Season 11 “Luke, you’ve got one on your tail!”: Celebs read the best vintage Star Wars quotes Saw: Gerrera Ebe E. Endocott’s Garage How To Train Your Tauntaun Canto Bight Valet Harry Potter and the Order of the Jedi