October is Domestic Violence Awareness month. Women are not the only victims of domestic violence. Men suffer from domestic violence, as well. One in three victims of domestic violence is male. If you are a man in an abusive relationship, you are not alone.

Men are often reluctant to report abuse by women because they feel embarrassed, or that they will look like a joke, won’t be believed, or worse, that police will assume that since they’re male they are the perpetrator of the violence and not the victim.

An abusive wife or partner may physically hit, kick, bite, punch, spit, throw things or destroy your possessions. She may attack you while you are asleep or otherwise catch you by surprise to make up the difference in strength. She may also use weapons, such as a gun or knife, or assault you with an object, abuse or threaten your children, use the children as a pawn or harm your pets. Domestic abuse is not limited to violence. A few examples of what your spouse or partner may also do:

•Verbally abuse you, belittle you, or humiliate you in front of friends, colleagues, or family, or on social media sites.

•Be possessive, act jealous, or harass you with accusations of being unfaithful.

•Try to control where you go and who you see.

•Try to control how you spend money or deliberately default on joint financial obligations

•Find ways to isolate and manipulate you

•Threaten to leave you and prevent you from seeing your children if you report the abuse.

Men in abusive relationships experience the same emotional and psychological trauma as women in abusive relationships. They may feel like they deserve what they get, and they may feel they have no way out as they have no support system — they remain silent. Secrets keep people sick. Break the silence in your abusive relationship. There is help for you.

If you can identify any of these common traits in your relationship, there is help.

Please contact The Family Crisis Center (719) 275-2429

Victim Advocate at District Attorney’s Office (719) 269-0170

Rocky Mountain Behavioral Health (719) 275-7650

Fremont County Sheriff’s Office Victim Assistance (719) 276-5518

Victim Services Officer at Probation (719) 269-0139