The murder of Allison Baden-Clay sparked a media frenzy rarely seen in her home town of Brisbane.

Pages of newsprint and countless hours of television and radio were devoted to almost every aspect of the Brisbane mother-of-three's disappearance, the trial of her husband Gerard, and his imprisonment for life.

But perhaps the most chilling aspect of the crime is the sheer ordinariness of it. It happens all the time.

Criminologists call it "intimate partner homicide".

An analysis by the Australian Institute of Criminology found that of the 541 homicide victims between 2008 and 2010, 89 were women killed by a partner or former partner. That is about one in every six murders. Averaged out across the two years it means that a woman somewhere in Australia is murdered by the person she was closest to every eight days.

More broadly, domestic violence affects a number of women which is almost too large to believe.

According to the Australian Bureau of Statistics, almost 1.5 million women have experienced physical or sexual violence by a partner.

Many victims seek shelter in refuges to attempt to recover and reconstruct their lives, often with children in tow.

Nicola is one of them.

The 39-year-old has spent several weeks in Brisbane's Chisholm refuge with her four-year-old son and all the possessions she could fit into her car.

"I got told early on that I had no chance of having kids," she said.

"I had polycystic ovaries. Both me and my ex decided that we didn't need kids to go through life, so yeah, that was just what we did.

"We bought rental properties, we bought caravans, we kind of lived the fat life you could say.

"All of our friends had kids but that was okay. We always had them round and socialised a lot and thought 'good for them' sort of thing. And then I found out I was pregnant."

Pregnancy led to a life of abuse

It changed everything. She quit her job as the state manager of a warehousing company.

It was around this time that her partner began abusing her. It began with pushing and shoving.

"Then standing on your toes so you can't move and yelling in your face," she said.

On one occasion she said a gun was held to her head. On another she was choked so badly that, in fear for her life, she wet herself.

"That was my birthday actually," she said.

"Don't ask me why you go back. Don't ask me why you forget it happens. You don't forget it but you push it aside. I can't answer that and I can't answer it yet."

Domestic violence refuge is never empty

Jacque Taka runs the Chisholm refuge where Nicola is staying. Five women and up to 20 children can stay at any one time for a period of 13 weeks.

She says it's never empty.

Ms Taka says there is a shortage of beds across the state.

"We have not had a refuge built in over 20 years in Queensland. Same number of beds, yet our population has increased. The demand has increased considerably."

She hopes that the media will now focus on what she calls the silent epidemic.

"I think that we don't talk about it enough for them to appreciate how often it happens. It's not in the media, we don't talk about it, so it's not a problem.

"I'll give you an example - the king hit campaign. Four young men lost their lives. We've had 12 women die since January in Queensland."

Nicola says she has spoken out in the hope that people will listen.

"It's happening out there and people need to know it's happening out there even though everyone likes to be in denial, including myself," she said.

"It happens and it needs to stop."

- If you are suffering domestic violence call the Rape and Domestic Services Australia hotline on 1800 RESPECT.