Tldr: done with playing comp pubg for now



Gotta give the people who don’t like reading novels the gist of what this whole thing is mainly about.



Let’s start from the beginning..



I joined LYE back in September of 2018 when Zinite and me joined up with Mardones and Lorlax to try and get something going for APL Quals and the NPL Open Quals. Did okay in APL quals and decided to stick it out for NPL Open Quals in December. Didn’t think we would make it through the open quals, but we did. We brought Famasiity on as coach at this time before the preseason lan.



After making it through open quals and getting the opportunity to attend the preseason lan to figure out if we would be in NPL or NPLC, I had hope that we would be picked up by an org and would start making a little money. That wasn’t the case but we kept on grinding. We ended up moving Lorlax off the main roster after the preseason lan and picked up Thirdline to add some fragging ability to the team.



We ended up doing decent enough in both phase 1 and phase 2 to have the opportunity to attend the NPL Relegation lan’s to try and get into the NPL. As you can see from our team history at lan events, we weren’t that strong on lan. I honestly felt going into phase 3 we would have a strong chance at making it into NPL at the end of the phase with the current roster. We were getting better as a team and things were looking good. You could just tell the confidence was getting better and better.



During phase 2 we learned that Thirdline would not be coming back for phase 3 because he would be starting to work full time and has a kid on the way. No biggie. That’s life. After phase 2 ended we sat down as a team to figure out what we wanted to do moving forward. At this time Zinite said he wanted to step down to focus more on school. Both of their reasons for stepping away are completely understandable.



So now it was just Mardy and me on the active roster with Fam still coaching. Over the past few weeks we have been trying out some amazing players that I hope will take the opportunity if presented to join LYE. These past few weeks have been very, very, stressful for me thinking about who we are going to pick up and thinking about phase 3 and contemplating if I wanted to continue to play.



This past year has been hard on my relationship with my parents. A lot of our parents don’t support or understand video games. My parents wanted me to go to college, get my degree, and start working. I went to college, got my degree, but wanted to pursue something I was very good at and take a chance. I remember having an argument with my dad back in December of 2018 right before NPL Open Quals for phase 1. I looked him in the eye and told him that I wanted to pursue PUBG because I was good at it and have a chance to make a career out of it.



From a realistic point of view, I had a feeling that even though I was chasing a dream, I probably wasn’t going to be able to make a living playing. I had all these ideas and fantasies of being picked up by a decent org and start making a little money to prove to my parents that I can play competitively and make a living. I live with my parents and have been living with them since I graduated college and moved home last year. I’ve had this constant pressure since I’ve moved home to quit PUBG and just work.



We never got any good offerings from orgs. I reached out to over 50 before the preseason lan, before phase 1, and before phase 2. We had maybe two or three orgs reach back out to us and offer us very little (less than $250 a month). To be honest it was hard for me to see teams with org backings do worse than us knowing they are getting paid for playing and we weren’t. I always felt stressed because I couldn’t get me or the guys signed by a decent org.



I wanted to find a part time or full time job to help with my living expenses but with the area I am in and being so far away from the city, I wouldn’t be able to commute and play and give 100% to the team. To those of you that work full time and play comp pubg, I give you all the props. I just really wish I would have been able to find the team an org with decent salary.



So here we are, a month out from phase 3. I will be stepping away from the active roster and will be taking a break from playing comp pubg. All the stress from competing, feeling pressured to quit from my parents, not making money, not being signed by an org, and having to fill two slots on the roster have just sent me past my breaking point. I am not sure at this point when I will return or in what capacity (coaching, analyst, or player), but I would still like to be involved in comp pubg. I will be helping Mardy fill out the roster for phase 3.



I just wanted to say thank you to @mardonespubg, @famasiity, @zinitetv, @lorlax__ and @thridlinetv for all of the good times online and out in LA at the lan events. I will cherish all the good memories and what we have accomplished together. Thank you @PUBG and @OGNEsports for the opportunity to travel and play competitive pubg. I feel extremely humbled and privileged I have been able to compete over the past year. To everybody in the comp scene that I’ve met or played with since the beginning of pubg, thank you for letting me be a part of the community.



This isn’t a “good bye”, more of a “see ya later”.



Thanks for reading my novel.



-Hayden “Zaitus” Soph



P.s. - have fun on Sanhok lmao



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