ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

Australia’s peak environmental protection agency, the Department of Energy and Environment, has officially listed rugby union as a critically endangered sport this morning as the code struggles to shrug off its latest controversy.

In an ongoing mess, the upper-middle-class pass time’s governing body has been locked in a battle with Israel Folau, a star recruit from league, over a number of highly controversial comments he’s made about homosexuals and alcoholics.

The internal war has the potential to bankrupt the code, making it one of the most important sporting news stories of the year.

“But nobody seems to care,” said Barry Kennedy from the Department of Energy.

“In fact, there’s other critically endangered species like the swift parrot and the lead-beater possum that people give way more of a fuck about,”

“If rugby union was between a giant multinational mining company and a piece of land with some coal under it, you wouldn’t even need to bribe the government! They too wouldn’t care.

“It is what it is, then you die. That should be Rugby Australia’s slogan next season.”

The Advocate reached out to

More to come.