Identical vs Fraternal Twins: The Social and Psychological Differences

I had an interesting conversation recently with my good friend Sam, who has a fraternal twin sister, on the social and psychological pressures she has felt throughout her childhood, adolescence, and now adulthood.

Being part of a “twin unit” is a perplexing experience that can play a positive role in the lives of both persons. However, it also provides a unique set of obstacles, especially in recognizing differentiation and personal identity formation, so in that sense, it can be negative as well.

A little science behind it all. Fraternal twins are “dizygotic,” meaning that they developed from two different eggs fertilized by two different sperm cells, while identical twins are “monozygotic” and are developed from a single fertilized egg that split.

I never knew this.

The likelihood of identical twins is the same around the world, about 3 in 1,000, while the incidence of fraternal twins varies by geography and ranges from 6 to over 20 per 1,000 deliveries.

Being twins is a phenomenon that generally has a profound impact on the upbringing, development and social abilities of the twin children. Unlike “non-twins”, twins of both kinds are together from conception to adulthood and beyond. In many cases, this is an expectation that some can’t live up too.

They experience significant life events in tandem and spend the majority of their time together, whether by choice or not.

These special environmental conditions, which result from having a life partner from the moment of conception, affect the psychological and social development of many twins as well as the relationships they form throughout their lives.

Sam mentioned a disconnect occurred when the comparing game, that all humans know well, began. This is seen in both identical and fraternal, yet fraternal twins have a confusing spectrum of view on how to connect on a distinctly high or intense level.

Thoughts such as, “I’m tall, skinny, not curvy and a late-bloomer” can have vast detrimental effects when the fraternal twin is developing in the opposite form. The comparing becomes inevitable and psychologically painful.

Identical twins have the same piercing eyes. The same color hair. One may be introverted, while the other loves meeting new people socially. Discovering why identical twins differ is similar to fraternal, yet the differences are more subtle internally in nearly all cases.

Society reveres physical (Appearance) “success” on such a high level that identical twins relationships have an advantage from the start. If I looked at a brother and it was as if I were looking directly into a mirror, well, I would feel a strong sub-conscious connection personally.

Scientists who’ve run twin studies over the years have learned a lot from identical twins about what kinds of traits, from taste, personality, to even style, are bound by genetics. But, surprisingly, they know much less than one might think about the true power of the twin bond.

Some clues have started to emerge from studying this social phenomenom. Researchers have found that an extreme level of closeness and understanding of having a “best buddy for life” may be protective over their life span.

Researchers at the University of Washington analyzed a data set of 3,000 Danish twin pairs born between 1870 and 1900. This cohort was born a long time ago, but the age of the data set allowed the researchers to find out the death dates of the entire cohort.

”Results show that monozygotic (identical) twins have greater cumulative survival proportions at nearly every age compared to dizygotic (fraternal) twins”

They conclude that the social bond of being a twin “is a plausible driver of the survival advantage.”

Which is quite mind-blowing in my opinion.

This now helps me understand exactly where Sam is coming from.

We all do this action of comparison but twins have to leap over and around barriers to make their relationships strong, especially fraternal twins. This may seem unfair to fraternal twins, but it makes sense.

It is very much in line with how people who don’t have a twin sibling mimick the same actions. We as humans constantly want to look as good as that person, be able to perform intellectually as this person and be as cool as that dude.

In the end, I feel for Sam and her twin sister. They both have experienced life differently than identical twins but with very similar expectations. That is true pressure.

Communication of these feelings is tough for them as they desire the connection many identical twins naturally gravitate towards.

Researching and writing this article also helped me. I realized how much I compare myself to others. I came to the simple, yet profound, conclusion that we are all unique, never identical, all offer some form of love and that is what makes this world so damn beautiful.

Cheers,

J. Robert Fallon III