What on earth does a drake get arrested for? Hoarding without a licence? An air traffic control infringement? Doing an eat-and-run from a cattle farm without paying? Or a public act of indecency?



"Look, it's how drakes reproduce! You must understand that."



"Nonetheless, you were observed by small children."



"What, so it's my fault that the nosy little buggers were messing around with Daddy's binoculars, is that it?"



"You are required to comport yourself in a fashion that is not liable to lead to indecency within sight of minors."



"What about arresting the idiot who left his binoculars lying around where children could get hold of them during the mating season?"



"You could've tried for more altitude."



"More altitude...? Look, I'd just out-competed six other males, six, and then I had a demanding she-drake expecting that I step up, and you want me to fly higher?"



"You could've used the local geography for cover."



"The local... do you think I'm Anakin bloody Skywalker? This isn't pod racing, you idiot, we were mating! And she enjoys leaving the lights on, so to speak."



"You should have reminded her of the law, then."



"Oh, by the First Clutch, are you insane? She was bigger than me! She wanted to enjoy the view, I was happy to enjoy the view! Come on, she expected me to sing her the Song of New Life, not read her the damned riot act! She'd have torn my head off! As it was, I didn't quite hit that last note, she left damned bruises for that..."



"No matter how... distracting the circumstances, if you are within the recognised airspace of The Island, you must comply with the law."



"Well, go and arrest her, then, since she was the one whose mating flight went into your precious bloody airspace."



"Your partner is being pursued under the relevant civil authority's regulations, and will receive notification of the infringement by post."



"Infringement? What infringement?"



"Failing to lodge a flight plan with the relevant authority, and neglecting to wait for clearance before take-off."



"Oh, by the Ancestor's hemi-penes, I thought it was just Skins who are all mad, it turns out Stones are nuts, too..."