SMOKING electronic cigarettes may harm your image, according to experts.

Researchers at the Institute for Studies criticised the e-cigarette industry for promoting fags with batteries as being cool.

Professor Henry Brubaker said: “We studied one of those things, it’s got a blue light on the tip that comes on when you inhale, for Christ’s sake.

“The product itself is like a tiny version of a nightclub smoke machine, emitting a sort of scented fog.

“Also it comes in a silly little box that looks like something a small boy might carry beetles around in. And you have to screw the bits together like a rubbish version of the hitman in Day of the Jackal.”

Professor Brubaker warned that the long-term effects of e-cigarettes smoking could include being shunned by smokers and non-smokers alike.

He said: “They could make you too smelly for non-smokers, while also being too uptight for the cancer-indifferent traditional faggers.”

However e-cigarette smoker Julian Cook said: “I suppose not caring about whether you die prematurely is cool is it?”

“Oh…actually it is. Bugger.”