you are not too (fucking) sensitive

You, the people who dare to say to your families that you want something different; that you want love; that you want connection?

You are not too (fucking) sensitive.

You, the people who cry when someone is unkind to you? When someone judges you? When someone finds ways to put you down? When that someone is a family member or friend or partner?

You are not too (fucking) sensitive.

You, the people who are committed enough to changing old patterns that once people switch from outright condemnation to passive-aggressive snarck, you actually call them out?

You are not too (fucking) sensitive.

You, the people who say something when they hear someone say “That’s so gay” or “How retarded” or calling women “bitches” as is if it’s a term of affection or making generalizations about a person of color?

You are not too (fucking) sensitive.

You, the people who hug trees, recycle toilet paper rolls, and cry at the sight of birds bathed in oil after BP blows a rig?

You are not too (fucking) sensitive.

Let me tell you who you actually are:

When you ask your families to engage with you in a way that is loving and connected, you are asking everyone to rise and live bigger. You are engaged with connection.

(Note: the trick is to take responsibility for yourself, and not get attached to controlling/changing their behavior).

When you cry because someone who says they love you is treating you unkindly, you’re feeling the pain of disconnection from other human beings, and this means that you are not a desensitized sociopath. It means you’re a functioning human being who has not cut themselves off from what they feel.

(Note: the trick is to take responsibility for yourself, and not get attached to controlling/changing their behavior).

When you are committed enough to respectful relationships that you draw a clear boundary and you enforce it, including communicating those times where it seems like something passive-aggressive is happening, you are practicing this thing called “self-respect.”

(Note: the trick is to take responsibility for yourself, and not get attached to controlling/changing their behavior).

When you decide to speak up against discrimination, bigotry, and slurs, you’re taking a stand for your values as well as asking others to think about how their words, their “harmless jokes,” might contribute to a collective experience of oppression.

(Note: the trick is to take responsibility for yourself, and not get attached to controlling/changing their behavior).

When your heart aches at the destruction of the planet, you’re exercising compassion, connection, and a deep desire for life to thrive.

(Note: the trick is to take responsibility for yourself, and not get attached to controlling/changing the outcome).

So do you get it?

You’re not too (fucking) sensitive. You’re engaged. Connected. Human. Awake. Alive.

The people accusing you of being too (fucking) sensitive? They’re disconnected.

A moment of compassion for all of us, please.

We’ve all been there. We all have our moments of thinking that someone else’s needs or preferences are just too precious, and judging the hell out of them.

Let’s not polarize into an us/them.

But truly–celebrate your sensitivity. Those who are sensitive are those who are also paying attention. It speaks to the potential for a radiant love within. A deep love within, combined with a willingness to take positive action, is the only thing that has ever revolutionized the world.

Thank you for being so (fucking) sensitive.