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It wasn’t until recently when I scrolled through Instagram (goodbyestuff_official) that I started to notice a trend: people only post their happiest moments. This was even more alarming because at the time I had just come back from the hospital after a semi-severe spine issue, and in my peak stages of negativity I started to wonder: Why do we ignore pain.

This post has been in the makings for a while, but today I want to share everything I have ever learned about pain, but most importantly, the beauty that I have been able to find in pain after years of suffering from it.

Identifying Pain

The first step in dealing with pain is understanding that you are in pain. This may sound obvious, but denial has been one of mine – and many other people’s – greatest enemy. Denial is sneaky, it creates a logical path of justification in your brain so that in your own head everything is perfectly fine, even if others can see that you clearly aren’t.

But denial isn’t sudden, it is built from constantly shutting down negative emotions in our hopes to simply forget our bad times. We do this because we want to run away, to turn our backs to issues we know that if faced head first, may get the best of us.

Thus, to deal with pain, or better yet, to understand pain, you must first accept that you are in pain. This will hurt, and more often than not it may break you, but preventing denial leaves you open to finally understanding the beauty in pain.

The Beauty In Pain

Beauty In The Eyes of the Beholder

Ever since I’ve started recovering, I’ve taken some time from my schedule each and every day in order to answer this question for myself. It’s something that has been bugging me, a thought in my head that I simply couldn’t shake away. After much thinking however, I feel as if I may finally have a few answers:

Pain Can Be Shared

I’ve been told since my infant days that being sociable was one of the most important skills one could ever learn. It sounds cliche, and in many ways I’ve always treated the saying as such. But it wasn’t until recently that I found that this lesson has incredible worth, allow me to explain:

Every now and then, I fall victim to what I consider severe spikes of depression. Whilst they are rare, and definitely not chronic, these moments of my life make me questions the worth of seeing the light of another day – a blindfold that prevents me from seeing any beauty that world may have to serve. These are difficult moments in my life, days where I feel outspoken, unwilling to share my truest emotions with anyone from my significant other to my family – days where I am stuck in a trap in which I feel I can never escape.

Recently however, I decided to be more open about my struggles, and it has only helped. Don’t take my word as if it is easy, I am not a psychologist, and am definitely not the one you’ll hear saying that this type of change appears from night to day. Learning to communicate pain is difficult, it requires courage, patience, and then a whole lot more courage. But it is this courage to communicate something so personal to us (pain) that creates bonds, builds trust, and most importantly, shares the weight of anxiety that perhaps someone else is willing to constructively receive.

Pain As An Opportunity

As much as pain is often put in a negative spotlight, it is perhaps the most beautiful moment one can experience – if perceived in the right mind. About four or five months ago, I had a serious problem in my lymphatic system, it was so severe to the point that my doctor told me that had I arrived to the hospital in another twenty four hours, it would probably have been too late to save me.

This situation caused me trauma unlike I had never experienced before, facing the possibility of death and at the same time a gratitude for having just escaped it – it was pain at its finest, and it had a huge impact on me, both physically and emotionally. Yet for as much as I could have been carried on by this pain, it instead was the opportunity I needed to realise that life was fragile, and that mine could end at any moment.

It was after this beautiful moment of realisation that I decided to change my life drastically. My views towards issues changed, my passion towards Minimalism increased, I started reading more books, exercising more, treating others with more respect – this pain that could have eaten me alive, taught me how to be a better person.

Pain must be seen through the lens of context, it can be flipped upside down so that the must hurtful moments of your life can be taken as a chance for everything to start again. As much as we hate to believe that things can get better, they really can, but they start with accepting that your defeat is your first victory.

Closing Remarks

Whether you are currently in pain, or know someone else who is, understand that we all have our lows, and that to come out victorious, you must first release your inner courage and see the hidden beauty in pain.

If you have a specific issue you’d like to discuss, or any questions on how to deal with pain, don’t be afraid either leave me a comment on the blog, message me on Instagram, or email me through my contact form. I’ll be sure to get back to you as soon as humanly possible.