"Eating Whoppers now is a strategy for financial prosperity tomorrow," the chain's Ivan Shestov said in one of the best press release quotes ever written. Now I'm wondering if that's just the pen name J. Wellington Wimpy is using, though.

No matter. The press release says that for every rouble spent (59 roubles roughly converts to $1) earns a single Whoppercoin, and free Whoppers are 1,700 Whoppercoins. More than that, if you're of the vegetarian or vegan persuasion, like other cryptocurrencies, you can sell and trade these online. Burger King is expected to release Android and iOS apps to track your collection next month.

Not in Russia? You can monitor the way Whoppercoins are trading online. As of publishing time, there have been 36 transfers. Given that rival McDonald's has Hamburglar on its payroll, maybe Burger King would be wise to up the security here.