“What are you, deaf?”





Well, yeah I am actually. Kind of. Although if we’re being specific, I’m hearing impaired.





“Oh god, I’m so sorry!”





It’s okay, I’m used to it by now.





I really do have to apologise to anyone I’ve done that to, it’s somewhat satisfying to see the pure look of horror on your face when you realise what you’ve gotten yourself into. But I really don’t take any offence by it, so don’t worry!

It used to be an entirely different story though, I was so self conscious about my hearing aids when I was younger.

I’ve worn hearing aids since I was 3 and I got them because I have permanent nerve damage in both ears, due to suffering from a particularly bad ear infection. Although, at the time they thought it could be something that improved over time.

To be fair, my hearing has improved over the years, I don’t know if I actually know why that is – I’ve been going for so long that I don’t remember anything from before hearing aids! I do know why the hearing in my right ear improved slightly 6 years ago though. I had a hole in my ear drum and so I underwent surgery in which they patched up the hole with a skin graft that was taken from behind my ear.

It all went fine, but because I have some stupid allergy to Elastoplast, they couldn’t bandage me up with the modern bandages that actually stay on, so instead I was given the old fashioned one that kept slipping. Those poor night nurses must have hated my guts by the morning, they had to come and fix it so many times! I did look a little bit like a rugby player for a bit after the operation because of the pressure or something, but after that stage everything was great and my hearing even improved by a little bit!

I think it was from that point on that I very slowly began to accept my hearing aids really. Before then, I used to hate them. Like many children, I was bullied, and it all seemed to stem from wearing hearing aids. Maybe that was me taking things too personally, but all I know is that I got stupidly self conscious of them and started wearing my hair down to cover them (some habits are hard to break!)

I used to try and avoid wearing my hearing aids, which is so silly. Nowadays I wear them pretty much all the time – I know I need them. If scientists invented a way to cure hearing loss, I’m not convinced that I’d rush to them to get rid of my hearing aids. If you asked me 10 years ago, I’d have been first in that queue, but now I’m older I realise that my hearing aids have shaped who I am as a person. I wouldn’t have learnt the same things or grown in the same way without hearing aids, and I might be a completely different person.

I still struggle with wearing my hair up out in public because I don’t want people to notice my hearing aids. But really, no one tends to notice them because I’ve worn them for so long and people just don’t realise I have them, as I’ve just learnt to cope with them. (I taught myself to lip read and I’m pretty good at guessing what people might have said if I don’t hear the full utterance.) Gav is always trying to get me to wear my hair up and I’m ashamed to say I hardly ever do – sorry Gav! It’s not that I don’t think my hair looks nice up, it’s just that subconsciously I still don’t want them on show.

This is something I’m going to try and do more often from now on.