Let’s say there are 2 religions, we’ll just call them Religion A and Religion B. They both teach great things: to love not only God and your neighbor, but to love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you. They both make the people who join them better.

I have been investigating these churches and have found that both of them would require me to take some extra steps to join their church because I’m from Utah, and there are certain things about being brought up in Utah that can make it difficult to be a member. Religion A says you can’t eat fry sauce or layered jello and Religion B says you can’t be a fan of college football or drive a minivan. I’ll also have to wait 10 years, just to make sure I’m really prepared to walk away from these beliefs/practices.

So I do some soul-searching and studying and praying and I find out through experiences that are powerful, undeniable, and deeply personal that Religion A is actually Christ’s church, restored to the earth and under His direction. Religion B, as great as it is, simply is not. It’s a bunch of great people living the best they can and trying to be good people, but in the end, it’s just run by people.

What does this mean for me? It means I do what it takes to join Religion A. I give up my fry sauce and my jello and I wait until they say I’m ready, and I get to be a member of a church literally under the direction of Christ, and I know that the covenants I make with Him are sure, real, and that the things I learn there are more than just ‘nice stories’ – they’re true. And that is worth whatever it takes.

I would never dream of telling God that He was really out of line for requiring me to give things up or wait extra time to join it. Because He’s God, and He loves me, and I trust Him.

And what about Religion B? Well, there’s really nothing to say. I still think they’re great people, but I’m really not too concerned about their requirements for joining because, nice as they are, it’s just not true. These people have become my friends, and despite the fact that I don’t believe in their church, I know how important it is to them, so I will still treat them and their practices with respect and kindness, and try to be understanding and courteous if they don’t want to watch college football with me or drive around in my minivan.

If you haven’t figured it out yet, these churches BOTH represent The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. There’s been a lot of controversy on social media today about a policy change in the Mormon church. Specifically, people are worked up because the children of same-sex families will now be required to go through some extra steps (the same steps that polygamous families have had to go through for many years) in order to receive ordinances: wait until they’re 18, show that they have a correct understanding of the law of chastity, and get permission from the First Presidency.

Here’s the part I just don’t understand, though. The church is either true, or it’s not. It’s either Religion A or Religion B. If it’s Religion A, does it matter what God requires to join it? If it’s Religion B, does it matter what men require to join it? If it’s Religion A, whatever it takes to join it is not only worth it but actually inspired. If it’s Religion B, why is ANYONE worked up over what it takes to join it? If you think it’s Religion B, why do you care at all? Beyond that, why do you think it’s okay to tear down Religion B, just because you feel you’ve found for yourself that it’s not true?

If people are upset because they think that this is somehow a rejection of the children of gay families, that could not be farther from the truth. We love these children AND these families. It is because we love them that we want to make sure that any members of these families who want to make sacred covenants do so with an adult understanding of what it really means.

This is not a shunning, and I hope people both outside AND inside the church understand that. We don’t want to exclude these children from our hearts, our homes, or even our churches, if that is where they want to be. We just want them to take extra time and consideration before they enter covenants.

But in the end, the real question is, is it Religion A, or Religion B? If you have found for yourself that it is Religion A, then trust God. He knows what He’s doing. If you’ve found that it is Religion B, please try to be kind to your family and friends who love that Religion and who are doing their best to be good people. The way YOU treat THEM is NOT a reflection of their religion; it is only a reflection of YOU. So please, be kind.