Chapter Text

5:58 PM

On a Friday

Republic City

“Look at this shit,” Korra said. She wiggled the beer tap and a spurt of beer arced out over the bar.

“Holy shit, dude,” Bolin laughed. “Mako, bro, did you see that? Korra do it again!”

“Yeah,” Mako said, not looking up from his phone, “I really don’t care.”

“Do it again!” Bolin said eagerly.

Korra wiggled the tap again and Bolin tried to catch the jet of beer in his glass.

“How the fuck did this happen, dude?” Korra asked excitedly.

“I have no idea, but I love it!”

Korra leant over the bar and tried to catch the next spurt in her mouth. “This is definitely the best way to drink beer.”

Mako looked up and frowned. He tapped Bolin on the shoulder. “Oh, wait, bro. You did that last night. That was you.”

“What? Oh … yup. Yup, it was me. My bad.”

“What did you do?” Korra asked, wiping her mouth on the back of her hand.

“I was throwing rocks.”

“You were throwing rocks? Inside the bar. Why were you throwing rocks inside the bar, dude?”

“I … uh … I think I might have been a teeny bit drunk. And … there might have been a rat?”

“Yeah,” Mako said, “I got twenty-three texts from you last night about it. Look. ‘Bro. Thars rats in het bra’ and then ten exclamation marks. Then there’s a unicorn emoji for some reason. And then two minutes later I got another text saying ‘I might has brokened the bree tasps with a Rock’. I don’t know why you capitalised ‘Rock’.”

“The only rock with a capital ‘R’ that I can think of is Dwayne Johnson,” Korra said.

“And that homeless guy who lives behind the Burger King,” Bolin added.

“You threw Rock the homeless guy at a rat?” Korra gasped.

“No! At least … I don’t think so.”

“You really need to use autocorrect when you’re drunk texting, bro,” Mako said chidingly.

“I do,” Bolin protested. “It’s not my fault that my phone is an idiot. And it’s too small for my hands!”

Korra sent another stream of beer flying at Bolin and he fell off his stool.

He was picking himself up when the door to the back alley opened and Asami slunk in. She took her sunglasses off and undid her hair, letting it spill over her shoulders like liquid charcoal. Korra watched, mesmerised.

“Hey, dick farts,” Asami said, peeling off her jacket. “Just woke up. What’s going on?”

“The bar has rats. Bolin broke the beer tap. Korra’s getting everything sticky,” Mako said, still not looking up from his phone.

“Oh, cool.” Asami sat down on Bolin’s barstool opposite Korra and shot her a grin. She slid Bolin’s empty glass across the bar to Korra. “Fill me up with your sweet frothy goodness, my buxom tavern wench.”

“Oh my god!” Bolin and Mako groaned in unison.

“What?” Korra asked.

“How can you two not hear yourselves?”

“Hear ourselves? What are you talking about?”

“Fill me up?! Frothy goodness?!” Mako groaned. “You’re always saying shit like that and it’s so weird.”

“It is getting pretty weird, guys,” Bolin agreed.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Asami said, raising her eyebrows in annoyance.

“Hey, Asami,” Korra said, grinning crookedly. “Watch this.” She wiggled the tap and sent yet another thin spurt of beer flying over the bar.

“Holy shit!” Asami laughed. “Squirt in my mouth!”

“Oh my god!” Bolin and Mako both shouted.

Korra yanked on the beer tap so hard that something broke and a jet of beer shot out, drenching Asami.

“Korra! Stop! You’re making me wet!”

“Oh … my … god,” Bolin and Mako sighed.

“Shit, sorry,” Korra grabbed a dish cloth and managed to stem the flood of beer pouring out over the bar. Asami began drying herself off with a cloth that Mako threw at her and Korra leapt over the bar to help. “I am so sorry, dude. I am so sorry!”

“It’s okay! Buy the first round tonight at that new karaoke place and I’ll forgive you,” Asami laughed as Korra dabbed at her neck and chest with the cloth.

“Waitwaitwaitwait. First of all … What the fuck?! You two are going out singing and drinking and you didn’t invite me?” Bolin said, looking genuinely hurt. “And secondly … You two are going out to drink? Why not just drink here?”

Korra and Asami looked at each other and burst out laughing.

“This place is a shit hole!”

“Yeah, we don’t want to spend our Friday nights here! There are rats … and you two.” Asami laughed, peeling off her sodden blouse. Korra looked away awkwardly as the blood rose to her cheeks.

Korra laughed to hide her mild embarrassment. “Yeah. W- we actually want to have a good time.” She glanced at Asami. “Tonight is going to be fantastic!”

“You know what would make it even more fantastic?”

“What, dude?”

“If I could come up with some way to get free drinks without getting hit on,” Asami said thoughtfully.

“Asami Becomes a Pimp”

“Well, of course the plan won’t work if you’re wearing grubby jean shorts and a sleeveless t-shirt which, by the way, I’m still not convinced you didn’t steal from a drunk frat-bro,” Asami said as she unlocked the door to her apartment.

“What’s wrong with my jean shorts?” Korra grumbled. “They show off my killer thighs.”

Asami raised an eyebrow and sucked her lip thoughtfully as her gaze roamed over Korra’s muscular body. “That’s true. But you could show off your legs in a sexy dress too.”

Korra groaned loudly. “Do I have to wear a dress?”

“Yes! I just want you to look pretty, baby,” Asami said, taking Korra’s hand and guiding her into the apartment.

Asami’s place was small. It was a good deal bigger than the room that Korra rented from Tenzin, but it was still small. The wallpaper was a hideous pale green and there were large and ever-growing patches of damp on the walls. Asami had moved in about a year ago and there were still stacks of cardboard boxes stuffed full of clothes in nearly every corner. The shelves and cupboards and every inch of every other available surface was full of art and gadgets and useless junk that Asami and the gang had managed to ‘rescue’ from her dad’s house before everything had been seized by the authorities.

“I’m still not sure about this plan. I feel kinda like you’re …”

“Pimping you out?” Asami asked as she fished a couple of beers out of the fridge

“Yes, exactly,” Korra said, flopping down on Asami’s threadbare sofa and reaching for the remote that was hidden under a pile of laundry. “And the fact you knew what I was going to say doesn’t really reassure me that you’re not!”

“Won’t you do it for me, baby?” Asami said, doing her best puppy-dog eyes as she sat down opposite her on the coffee table.

“Stop calling me baby! That sounds almost exactly like something a pimp would say,” Korra said as she flicked through the channels.

“Look,” Asami said, chuckling. “It’s a great plan. I get people to buy me drinks and in return I introduce them to you. They pay for your drinks. You talk to them for a bit. Then you get rid of them. Tell them you’re gay or you’re looking for something serious or you want to wait until you’re married or something like that. Throw up on them if you have to. It’s a fool-proof plan.”

Korra gnawed her thumbnail. “I dunno. You know what guys can be like. I highly doubt telling them I’m a lesbian would actually discourage many of them.”

“True. You could just beat them up, I suppose,” Asami shrugged, passing Korra a bottle.

Korra took a sip. “Okay, I’m liking this plan more now. Free drinks. Beating the shit out of people. Getting hammered and singing our lungs out.”

“Sounds like a good plan, right?”

“Such a good plan!”

“So good.”

“I don’t want to wear a dress though.”

“Oh come on!”

Korra shook her head emphatically. “I do not like wearing dresses.”

“At least try some on,” Asami pleaded. "You can keep your combat boots on. Everything looks good with combat boots. Go on. Please try on some dresses!"

Korra thought for a moment while Asami did the puppy-dog eyes again.

“Okay! Fine!” Korra groaned, throwing her head back resignedly. “I’ll try some dresses on. But I’m not making any promises.”

Asami jumped up and dragged Korra to her feet. “I have the perfect dress!”

“What, now? I thought … oh, o- okay. Now.”

Korra was dragged into Asami’s walk-in wardrobe which was, in actual fact, her bedroom. She sat Korra down on the bed and began rummaging through the piles of clothes that covered everything like snow after a blizzard.

“Where is it? Where is it?!” Asami muttered to herself.

“You can’t find it?” Korra asked, getting to her feet and edging towards the doorway. “That’s too bad. We tried. Never mind.”

“Ah-hah! Found it!” Asami exclaimed.

“Dammit.”

“What do you think?” Asami asked, holding up a shimmering backless blue dress that looked to Korra as though it would only barely cover the essentials.

Korra sighed. “Okay, fine. Chuck it here. I’ll put it on in the bathroom.”

“Dude, it’s not a big deal. Put it on here.”

“Here?”

“Yeah, I mean, why not? We’re buddies.”

“Yeah!” Korra made a strange noise with her mouth. “We’re buddies. We’re pals.”

“Just a couple of gal pals.”

“Whoa. Well, we’re … we’re not gal pals.”

“Oh, yeah. No. But I mean … there’s nothing weird about getting changed in front of each other.”

“Of course not. We’re both adults. And …” Korra fiddled with the label of her beer bottle, tearing it with her thumbnail. She chugged the last of her beer and held out her hand for the dress.

Asami passed it to her and she began to take her t-shirt off. She hesitated a little and felt herself blushing, though she wasn’t sure why.

“You … you want me to turn around?”

“No, no that’s okay.” Korra waved her hand dismissively. “There’s no reason for us to be awkward around each other, right?”

“No reason at all!” Asami’s cheeks were turning pink but Korra assumed it was just the heat. It was rather hot in there, Korra decided.

Gritting her teeth, Korra whipped her t-shirt off as quickly as possible. Like pulling teeth, she thought. She realised too late that she wasn’t wearing a bra.

Asami gulped loudly. “Oh!” she gasped. “You … you’re not wearing a … that’s cool. That’s fine. We’re buddies. It’s fine.”

“Oh, uh, yeah. I was eating burritos in my underwear this morning and I got hot sauce on my bra and I didn’t have any clean ones so … yeah.”

“It’s good I’m not gay or anything, because if I were, I’d be all over that,” Asami laughed, waving vaguely at Korra’s body.

“Really?”

Asami’s laughter got louder and her face got redder and redder. “Yeah! Yeah, I’d wrap my legs around your head. All you can eat buffet. And I’d bend you over right here and … and …” Asami’s awkwardly forced laughter turned into an almost pained intake of breath and a silence hovered over them. “I’m gonna get another beer.”

“Awesome.”

“You want another beer?”

“Yeah, I’ll have another beer.”

“I’ll go get you another beer.” And with that, Asami vanished.

When Korra had finally managed to squeeze herself into the dress, she pulled on her boots and stood in the doorway. Asami had her back to her, messing around with the settings on the TV, another beer in her hand. Korra was half-tempted to lean against the doorframe, stick her chest out, and throw her head back.

Instead she just folded her tattooed arms and coughed. Asami turned around and her mouth fell open. Korra started laughing as she felt her cheeks turning red.

“How do I look?”

Asami inhaled sharply. Her mouth opened and closed and opened again but no sound came out.

“What do you think?” Korra asked, running her fingers embarrassedly through her hair.

Asami gulped down her beer noisily, hiccupped, and took a deep breath.

“Yup,” she managed to say, nodding emphatically.

“It’s a bit tight round here,” Korra said, gesturing vaguely at her chest. “And should I be wearing a bra? Everyone’s gonna be able to see my nipples.”

“No, no, that’s good. You’ve got great boobs. We’ve gotta show them off.” Asami gave Korra’s breasts a critical look, her finger to her chin. “We’ll have more johns than we’ll know what to do with.”

“Can you not call them ‘johns’?”

“Why?”

“Makes me sound like a hooker.”

“What’s wrong with that? Stop demonizing sex workers, Korra.”

Korra rolled her eyes and rearranged the dress a little, smoothing out the wrinkles.

“Can’t believe I’m letting you pimp me out like this,” Korra grumbled.

“Now …” Asami said thoughtfully, scanning the heaps of clothes everywhere. “What should I wear?”

“Oh! Oh! A … a top hat and … and …” Korra paused. “I had something for this. Damn it. What do pimps wear?”

Asami shrugged.

“I could probably pull off a top hat.” She set her empty beer bottle down on the coffee table. “I’ll pick something after we’re done getting you ready.”

“What … what else have we gotta do?” Asami tiptoed over to her purse, carefully, as if stalking a frightened deer. “Asami?” Korra took a cautious step back as Asami pulled out a stick of lipstick, opened it, twisted it, and pointed it at Korra. “Oh no you don’t!”

Asami smiled devilishly as Korra started backing away.

“Come here, baby. We gotta make you look pretty! You wanna look pretty for me, don’t you?” Asami laughed as she chased Korra into the bathroom.

The night didn’t get off to a good start. It was drizzling and although the street lights looked beautiful shimmering in the puddles, it took them longer to get into the club than they’d anticipated.

“I feel ridiculous,” Korra hissed as they waited in line.

“You look great,” Asami said, rubbing Korra’s shoulders.

“It’s cold.” Korra had Asami’s jacket draped over her shoulders but she was still shivering. “My nipples are like fricking antennas right now. Feel them.”

“Oh my god! They are!”

Bolin groaned. “You two need to get a room!”

“What?”

“We’re not gay.”

“Then stop touching each other’s nipples!”

Korra frowned at him. She had been looking forward to spending the night with just Asami. But Bolin had invited himself along at the last minute. Korra had been all for telling him to go have sexual relations with himself but Asami had decided that they’d need the extra muscle. “In case the clients cause trouble,” she had said. Korra could have strangled her.

They waited in silence until Bolin yelped in horror as a passing car threw up a wave of spray over him. “That does it!” he yelled. “I’m gonna go show the bouncer my tits.”

Asami chuckled as Bolin stormed off. Korra huddled herself closer to her, attempting to share her warmth. Asami smiled down at her sympathetically and wrapped her arms around her.

“Do I have to spend the whole night with random guys?” Korra asked.

“Of course not! Babe, it’ll be like thirty minutes, forty tops, and then we’ll be doing body shots off an unconscious Bolin and singing ‘Atomic’ together for the rest of the night.”

“I don’t really like that song,” Korra lied, smirking.

“Korra, sweetheart, talk shit about Blondie one more time and I swear to God, I will throw you into the traffic.”

Korra laughed and elbowed Asami in the ribs.

“Hey!” Bolin called from the door to the club. “Come on!”

Korra and Asami hurried past the smiling bouncer and breathed a sigh of relief at finally being in the warm.

“I can’t believe you actually managed to get us in!” Asami laughed. “Your body’s not that great.”

Bolin smiled wryly, showing her the pen scrawled on the back of his hand. “Oh yeah? Then how come I got his number too?”

“Ooooh!” Korra laughed, giving him a playful shove. “You gonna give him a call?”

“Probably,” Bolin said.

“You are? I thought you were straight.”

Bolin shrugged. “I think I’m attracted to people who could beat me up.”

“That explains why you were so hot for my cousin.”

Once they were inside, it wasn’t long before Asami found Korra her first ‘date’. Korra was sitting at the bar, where Asami had sat her, watching Bolin twerking on the dance floor.

“Korra!” Asami said, far too loudly, dragging a man over. She had a cocktail in her hand and Korra guessed she was on her third or fourth by now. This loser she’d found must be pretty desperate. Korra forced a smile. “This is Tahno!” Asami shouted. “He plays the saxophone!”

“Trumpet.”

“Whatever!” Asami drained her drink in one go and patted him on the back. “I’ll leave you two to get acquainted!” She tried to wink, but ended up just blinking slowly. Korra couldn’t help laughing.

Tahno ran his fingers through his oily hair in what Korra supposed was meant to be a seductive motion.

“So …” Korra said awkwardly, “trumpets, huh?”

“Yeah,” he said, sniffing aloofly. “I guess you could say I have a talented mouth.” He winked at her and leant closer, licking his lips.

Korra laughed through gritted teeth and made a mental note to herself to kill Asami.

Dripping with sweat and breathless from the dance floor, Bolin sat down next to Asami at the bar. She was scowling ferociously and gnawing her straw between her teeth.

“Looks like your plan worked,” Bolin said, nodding towards Korra and Tahno on the stage. They were on their fourth song together and were currently butchering something by The Ronettes.

Asami huffed angrily.

“What’s wrong?” he asked.

“Nothing!”

Bolin raised his eyebrows and pried the empty glass out of Asami’s hands. Asami carried on chewing on her straw, her lips curled in distaste.

“Why are you so pissed? You’ve practically drained the bar dry and this loser has paid for everything.”

“I …” Asami spat the mutilated straw out of her mouth. “I thought this would be fun, y’know. Get free drinks, take advantage of some pathetic creeps, and get wasted. But … it’s not! I feel awful and I don’t understand why.”

“Maybe you feel bad for pimping Korra out to strangers?”

“No … that’s not it.”

“Are you sure? Because that’s a pretty shitty thing to do.”

“Oh, whatever! Mr Saint bloody Peter.”

“What? That makes no sense.”

“Fuck off.”

“How much have you drunk.”

“Not enough!” Asami said waving at the bar tender.

“Why are you so angry?”

Asami pushed her hair out of her face and glanced at Korra on the stage. She took a deep breath, trying to focus through the alcohol-induced haze. “I … I don’t like seeing her with … with anyone else.”

“Oh, shit!”

“I think …”

“Yes?”

“I think … I …”

“Yes?!”

“I think … I might have … feelings for Korra.” Asami said ‘feelings’ in much the same way as you might say ‘syphilis’ or ‘Adam Sandler’.

“Oh! Shit!” Bolin was practically vibrating. “I fucking called it!”

“Don’t tell anyone!” Asami said, grabbing him by the shirt, her eyes wide with horror. Bolin was grinning like a child at Christmas. “I swear, if you breathe a word of this to her … or Sharkbrows … I swear I will tear your testicles off and feed them to you!”

“Okay, okay! My lips are sealed.” Asami let go of him and tried to get the bar tender’s attention again. “Even if you don’t want to tell her, you should at least go have fun with her,” Bolin said.

“With who?”

“With Korra! Lord, how dunk are you, dude?”

“Very little bit.”

“Go tell this creep to fuck off!” Bolin said, pushing Asami off her stool. “Go win your woman back!”

“I will do that!” Asami said, swaying slightly and clasping his cheeks tenderly. “I will do that. You’re a great friend, Bo.” She chuckled to herself. “Bo Peep. Little Bo Peep. Have you lost your sheep, little Bo Peep?”

“No more drinks for you tonight, okay?” Bolin said, turning her around and shoving her in the direction of the stage.

Asami meandered her way through the crowd and staggered onto the stage. Tahno had his arm around Korra’s waist and a red fury descended over Asami.

“Hey, Tahno, you douche fuck!” she yelled.

He was about to say something when her fist struck him in the face, sending him sprawling across the stage. Asami kicked him and picked up his microphone.

Korra stared at her open-mouthed. Asami smiled sweetly and obliviously began to sing the words to a completely different song from the one on the screen.

“Fingers on lips,” Asami sang, horribly off-key and reaching a hand out to Korra. “Allow his hands to your hips!”

“You know you shouldn’t do thiiiiiiis!” they sang in unison, hand in hand, while Bolin cheered from the bar.