A stand-up comedian once noted: “I thought about buying a copy of, ‘The Power of Positive Thinking.’ But what good would that do?”

Wonder if the comic ever heard of the Minnesota Wild. As the NHL trading season kicks off, perhaps Chuck Fletcher is on the lookout for the one commodity most needed by the Wild: emotional stability. In other words, somebody who is not susceptible to the manic mood swings that currently afflict the team.

(In a minute, I’m going to make a case for acquiring Jaromir Jagr. But you probably aren’t ready for that yet, so we’ll wait a few paragraphs.)

The Wild are not a last-place team. They just aren’t. Even factoring in the occasionally shaky goaltender, they should be doing better than this. All the core players are here, except for Matt Dumba. In fact, Dumba really is the only prospect left in Iowa, which has the worst record of all 30 American Hockey League teams.

There’s plenty of skill in Minnesota. The problem is that, emotionally, the Wild are all over the map. At times they work so hard they appear to be possessed. Then they just give up, especially when things don’t go their way. Everybody in the building can see it. And opposing teams know that they just have to weather a temporary storm or two before taking control.

Some blame coaching, but I don’t know. It’s not like it used to be, when coaches dominated players’ lives. Don Cherry once traded defenseman Barry Beck from Colorado to the New York Rangers because Beck kicked Cherry’s famous pit bull, Blue, in the behind. The dog supposedly was making a mess near Beck’s locker. No matter. See you later.

Scotty Bowman once gave a hotel bellman a hockey stick and instructed him to ask Montreal players to sign it as they came in. The catch was that the bellman wasn’t to begin asking for autographs until after the clock struck curfew. The next day, Bowman showed up at practice with the signed stick and fined everyone whose name appeared on the shaft.

Bowman also had a thing about his players staying up late and watching television in their hotel rooms. He’d supposedly barge in at all hours and put his hand on top of the TV, feeling whether it was warm or not. If it was, look out. Imagine something like that today?

It’s more of a business relationship these days. The coaches need the players to buy into the program. If they don’t, the coach gets the gate. The Wild appear to drift in and out of Mike Yeo’s system. It depends on their mood, I guess.

So … how would Jaromir Jagr look in a Wild uniform?

Jagr is 42, soon to be 43, and still productive with the New Jersey Devils. Yet the Devils are going nowhere and Jagr reportedly is agreeable to being traded. He might be just what the doctor ordered. Not the orthopedist, the psychologist.

Jagr would be valuable not so much for what he can do on the ice, which remains considerable — especially on the power play — but for his presence in the fragile Wild mental ecosystem. This is a veteran of more than 200 playoff games who has seen all there is to see. He is a powerful, positive force. Maybe he’s looking for one last challenge.

Hey, we have one for him. Right here.

Fletcher has shown a willingness to make deals before the deadline (March 2). The trading season usually kicks off about now. And right now it’s all about the Wild’s state of mind. They haven’t been right since that weird bounce off a stanchion at Xcel ended their 2013-2014 season.

The Wild appeared to be on the verge of great things. Some even considered that shocking, overtime playoff exit a lesson — a necessary lesson — on the road to the Stanley Cup. And everyone seemed determined to come back and help carry the team to a higher level.

Well, here we are more than halfway through “next season” and the Wild now qualify as the most confounding team I’ve ever watched. Perhaps they are suffering from PTSD — Post-Traumatic Stanchion Disorder. They got off to good start, winning some very tight games, only to quickly collapse in a heap.

Jagr knows what to do. Heck, the guy played with Mario Lemieux. He wouldn’t cost much, either. And that’s a real bonus considering how expensive psychiatric help is these days.

Tom Powers can be reached at tpowers@pioneerpress.com.