Here are just a few of the bon mots, jabs, sharp elbows, and haymakers Obama tossed out at last night's Gridiron Club Dinner. (video to follow)

Following standard protocol, he opened with a joke:



This is my third appearance at this dinner as President. And I predict you will laugh harder than ever. I’m not saying I’m any funnier. I’m saying weed is now legal in D.C. (Laughter and applause.)

It is amazing, though, how time flies. Just a few years ago, I could never imagine ever being in my fifties. And when it comes to my approval ratings, I still can’t. (Laughter.)

I mean, think about how things have changed since 2008. Back then, I was the young, tech-savvy candidate of the future. Now I’m yesterday’s news and Hillary has got a server in her house. (Laughter.) I didn’t even know you could have one of those in your house. (Laughter and applause.)

On the bright side, by the time I’m done with this job, I will finally have enough life experience for a memoir. (Laughter.)

Quickly dropped in a little self-deprecation:A nod to current events:Soften the blow with a little more self-deprecating humor:Once the crowd's warmed up, time to pull out the big guns ....