After considering several prominent members of the wolfpack, the editorial board of the Artifex has decided to award our honorable “Person of the Year” award to Doge, a popular internet meme of a shiba inu. It was a very difficult decision to make considering the large quantity of individuals that have given their time in the form of service, discovery, and selflessness.

Other candidates considered included:

BeeJay Anya: for playing good sportsball and scoring points in the sports

Iron Mau: through withstanding the adversity of falling into a molten vat of aluminum to go on to release many informative emails

Chancellor Woodson: for working his “darnedest” to increase NCSU’s endowment for our “broke ass” school in addition to learning how to chancel more effectively

My cousin Vinnie: this lawyer really helped get me through finals week and avoid going to prison for murder

Nicki Vaught: single handedly reformed culture and resolved the tragic problem of symbolic oppression in sports by writing less than 700 words in his article “Sports Culture Hates Women”

Doge originally gained his fame as a model, but then soon turned to the emergent world of cryptocurrencies by creating Dogecoin. Although this new currency is relatively worthless compared to Bitcoin and Litecoin, it is one of the fastest growing on the market of decentralized money.

But, what makes Doge a true hero and role model for all is his generous philanthropy. Under his leadership members of the Dogecoin community have donated to people in need: the Jamaican bobsled team, Josh Wise (a NASCAR driver), your uncle Fred, and the poor writers of the Artifex. Furthermore, nobody can deny the joy that they feel when they see colorful phrases written in comic sans captioned over the charismatic japanese dog.

It was for these reasons (not because we received 11000 Dogecoins anonymously), that we, the noble writers of The Artifex, select Doge as the person of the year.

(PS: to the n00bs that have no clue what a Dogecoin is, 11000 Dogecoins is equivalent to around 2$)