My single greatest personal benefit since my wife left her job wasn’t what I expected.

I love knowing she no longer has to deal with “work stress.” I’ve thoroughly enjoyed the benefits of her growing from a very good cook to a fabulous one. It’s also great not having to drop the kids at daycare for 12 hours a day.

The best part for me, though, is that our weekends have been freed up. It’s amazing to have that time back to have fun instead of going shopping!!!

It turns out, in this respite from visiting stores myself, my shopping muscles have gotten soft. This post is my reminder. Shopping is hard – Don’t be a sucker.

Shopping Is Exhausting

When we were a two-income family, we did most of our shopping together. Weekends are short in the first place. I never felt I could get enough time with my wife. She may even have felt the same about me ;).

Most of the time, when we had errands to do, we went together. At least we got to spend some quality time together while we planned the next week’s meals.

I have very mixed feelings about the activity of shopping for food or any other item.

On one hand, I love trying to optimize each purchase. I love the feeling of accomplishment I get when we have a need and I find the single best way to fill that need while properly balancing high quality and the best possible price.

That joy of perfect optimization is part of the reason this site has the word “Winning” in the title.

On the other hand, as a person well aware of how investment growth can compound, I hate when dollars go out the door, especially when they do so inefficiently. Paying $4 for milk that could’ve been had for $3 drives me nuts – even though it’s only a buck extra.

Since it’s almost impossible to get every decision perfect, I always finish a shopping trip exhausted from trying to avoid inefficiency.

I’ve been thrilled not having to do the shopping. Especially since Mrs. WPF does a great job of finding balance between optimal buying and not driving herself crazy.

My Costco Trip

One day last month, the Mrs. suggested a family trip to Costco because we were in the neighborhood and she needed to pick up a few (very specific) things. I had not been on a full fledged shopping trip in months at this point.

While my wife diligently went straight to the items on her list, I was like a kid in the candy store. I was in Costco after all, the prices on everything must be great!!!!

“We NEED this gigantic package of chocolate chip cookies, right?” “The living room’s been a little hot lately, let’s pick up this $250 fan.” “Oooooooooo look at all those socks.” “Yum, a 7 lb package of bacon!” quietly slides it into shopping cart. “Check out the prices on these family size packages of ribs and lamb.” Side note, I’m the only one in my household that eats these items. “This 12 pack of children’s books is such a great deal! My son will love them, who cares that they won’t be age appropriate for him for another 5 years.”

You get the point. Thankfully, I had enough self control not to buy ALL of these items. Still, we walked away with more unnecessary (and unhealthy) stuff and less money than if I had not entered the store in the first place.

I learned some lessons from this trip.

Here I am, a fairly frugal financial advisor with pretty strong willpower. I write about being intentional with money. Streamlining finances. Reaching goals. Yet, the first time I had a chance to go nuts in a warehouse store, I pretty much did. Here are my takeaways:

If You’re The Sucker, Stay Out of The Store

If you’re lucky enough to be part of a multiple adult household, chances are, one of you has more discipline and willpower than the other. Who that is may even vary depending on what store we’re talking about. If one of you is more disciplined food shopping and the other is more disciplined buying household items, only go into the stores where you are the better shopper.

Only Shop for Items on Your List

Stores are very effective at marketing. Items are strategically placed on shelves to get you to spend on what you don’t need. It’s really difficult to avoid impulse buying. To combat this, shop with a list of what you intend to buy and don’t add anything else into that cart.

If an item or two catches your eye, start a new list and evaluate that buying decision in the calm of your home before going out next time. At home, the cookies and bacon would have never made it onto my list.

Remember the Difference Between Wants and Needs

None of the stuff I added to the cart was needed. Only the items on Mrs. WPF’s shopping list were. Before I walked into the store, I didn’t even want any of the goodies mentioned above. Yet, I thought it was a good idea to separate myself from my money for some of them anyway.

If you’ve run out of toilet paper, go buy some as soon as you can. If you run out of cookies, try adding a few hurdles before buying more, no matter how good of a deal they are. Your wallet and waistline will thank you.

It’s Okay to Spend on Top Priorities

I’m not anti-spending. I’m not even anti-spending on “wants.” Putting your resources toward your top priorities, whatever they may be, is a great feeling. Before putting an unnecessary item in that shopping cart, stop and ask yourself how it relates to your top priorities and goals.

I’ve been reading the new package of books to my son since we bought them. It’s had me really excited about our bedtime story routine and he’s been enjoying longer chapter stories while increasing his vocabulary.

I’m happy with that impulse buy because my son’s education and spending quality time with him is a priority. The bacon was not on the shopping list, not a need, not a top priority and is now making my pants fit poorly. I’m not okay with that one.

Shop With Blinders

Every time you walk into a store, it’s truly a minefield. This applies to all types of stores, grocery, big box, clothiers or sporting goods. If they have a physical location or online.

The proprietors are doing everything they can to separate you from your money so they can win. They don’t care about your wants and needs or your goals. They just want your money.

It’s easy to think with your taste buds and not your brain. The dopamine hit you feel when you buy something new is real. So is the regret when you get home and unpack those cookies.

Shop with a plan and with blinders. Don’t make the producer, marketer and store proprietor rich. Plan ahead and walk out of the store a winner.