Mrs. Sanders is a warm and energetic traditionalist. Gentlemen should button their blazers when they stand to greet someone. Salt and pepper shakers are passed in pairs and set politely near whoever asked for them. She preaches the gospel of inclusion through manners, and her students are willing disciples.

“It’s about respect,” said Brian Youngblood, 17. “This is how we got here as a civilization, so if we don’t learn this, we’re not going to evolve.”

At a time when cultural disruption seems to be winning an epic battle with tradition and there is no shortage of people willing to argue that table etiquette is as anachronistic as a rotary phone, some experts say the art of the table must be modernized to appeal to a generation that cares more about how people feel than how things look. Even the role of the cellphone is being reconsidered.

Mrs. Sanders would not disagree with those experts, because that would not be polite. Besides, they can all agree that graciousness and hospitality build the framework for good manners. But upholding the traditions of the Southern table is something she takes very seriously. It is a quest driven by details.