While many weed smokers around the United States are benefiting from dispensaries being labeled as “Essential Businesses,” there is an untold pot crisis going on in America that affects millions of anxious stoners. With big media outlets pushing certain narratives for views and clicks (looking at you, Chris Cuomo, though we know you mean well), we must ask ourselves: Who is being forgotten in all this? “My weed dealer has COVID-19,” twenty-four year-old Indianan Rita Taylor told Sleeping Sardines. “This is worse than when he goes out of town. At least then I know when I’ll be able to pick up again,” she added. Drug dealers are at an increased risk of contracting COVID due to the intimate exchange of Ziploc bags and impromptu smoke seshes where they share a bowl with the customer. Some reports claim that up to seventy percent of the nation’s low-grade weed dealers will contract the virus, leaving stoners desperate to find safe ways to attain flower. “It’s either hit up that really sketch dude from high school or drive to Colorado, I guess,” said thirty-year-old Omaha dweller Alex Larson, whose dealer tested positive for COVID-19 on Thursday. “Actually, fuck it,” he continued, “I’m just gonna pick up from my guy with corona and take my chances.”