A Jackson Hole resident is rueing the minute he decided to grab his skis out of storage before going up to ski September powder on the slopes of Togwotee Pass.

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Just yesterday, Stuart Manor AKA “Disco-Stu,” ventured up the Continental Divide for what were likely the first turns of the season in Wyoming as snow blasted him and his girlfriend, Tracy McGinnis. McGinnis, who decided to take snowshoes instead of her split-board, said the conditions were much too thin to ride herself but Manor was having none of it. “He kept telling me, ‘it’s all grass on this slope baby, I’ll be fine.'”

As they reached the top of the zone known as “Two Oceans,” Stuart told his girlfriend to walk down approximately 20 feet to capture on camera what he said, “were going to be the sickest September turns of my life.” Poling off the top, Stuart made two extremely tasty and deep powder turns, the second of which his girlfriend captured on camera. McGinnis later told Unofficial Networks, “the picture is a BANGER, no doubt about it.”

However after that second turn, Manor’s right knee drove straight into a pine stump, a remnant of what was likely an ill chopped Christmas Tree from the year prior.

“He began yelling and screaming bloody murder” recalled his girlfriend. “I didn;t know what to do. On one hand I had just grabbed a great shot of Stu but immediately after he was crying like a little girl. It was horrible.”

After alerting the authorities to their situation, the two hunkered down before getting rescued roughly 2 hours later. An ambulance at the top of Togwotee Pass ultimately drove Manor to St. John’s hospital in Jackson Hole, where he was diagnosed with a torn right ACL and severe bruising to his Patella.

Yet through it all, Manor doesn’t regret going skiing so early in the ski season. “I wanted to go and maybe if we didn’t get the shot I wouldn’t be saying this but… I don’t regret it. That’s the best powder shot anyone’s ever taken of me… and it’s in September. Fuck it. I’ve already gotten over 1k likes and 200 comments.”

At the time of the accident, Manor went a step further, disallowing his girlfriend tell anyone about his accident until the photo made a full 24 hour circulation on Instagram. Still, the ski bum says he hopes to catch “the last few weeks of winter. Hopefully I can get up there on Gaper Day.”

*This is a work of satire

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