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00:01 - 00:02 The Kamadhenu Herald regrets to announce

00:03 - 00:06 THE FEDERATION'S OPERATION WATERBOY HAS BEEN A SUCCESS! : (

00:07 - 00:15 Hudson and Winters forces conducted a blitzkreig campaign of shitposting and redditwhoring that made us believe the operation was a "red herring"

00:15 - 00:17 We were wrong. They fucked us again.

00:18 - 00:23 Our leaders missed the opportunity to send our elite ganking squadrons into Open to destroy a lone, badly damaged Asp Explorer

00:24 - 00:28 A cadre of Federation ace pilot tropes flew out under the cover of the smokescreen of the mass meme bombardment of our forces by federal spammers

00:29 - 00:33 and successfully located the ship and safely escorted it back to the bosom of Federation space right under our noses

00:34 - 00:38 The Asp pilot was a high value target, The spiritual leader of the Fed zerg, a symbolic figurehead of our enemy, the moral compass of the Hudson Horde

00:39 - 00:43 The emperor has posted "Y U No" memes in our subreddit, asking our leaders how this important man was able to return to the Hudson HQ from deep space

00:40 - 00:44 We now wait with dread this man's inevitable posting of the "Do you think I had forgotten about you?" youtube link

00:44 - 00:46 And his name is...

00:47 - 00:49 [John Cena music ensues]