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An Open Letter to All Those Backing Salman Khan

A still from 'Sultan'.

Dear misogynists,



This one is for all the men and women out there who have made it their life’s sole purpose to defend Salman Khan and try and explain to the world "what he really meant". For all of you who said that Salman comparing the act of pretending to be wrestler for a movie was (of course it was) the same as the horrific, violent barbarity of having your dignity violated, your choice taken away, of being physically assaulted.



For all of you who said that he didn’t mean to say he felt like ‘a raped woman’ and that the comment was, in no way, offensive.



For those of you who claim that he was misreported/misquoted/made to look bad.



For that 50-year-old superstar who sat at home like a petulant child and had his father (once again) apologise for his asinine comment.



Why the outrage over Salman you ask?



This isn’t just about the actor and his insensitive, callous remark. It’s also, equally, about all those reporters who were present when that comment was made - those who laughed after Salman delivered that line, almost with a flourish, and then paused for effect - allowing his remark to sink in.



For those who have labelled what he said a beat later - ‘I probably shouldn’t have said that’- an apology, an act of contrition.



It’s about everyone who has attempted to defend the crass sentiment. People like Subhash Ghai who bizarrely attempted to underplay what Salman said by calling a man who is a decade away from being 60, a "child". People like Nagma, who claimed that because she knew the actor, "there was NO way he meant it the way it sounded". Who went on to add, grudgingly, that perhaps that comment should not have been made in public - in a sense implying that making that comment in the privacy of our homes and in the company of our friends would have been okay.



And therein lies the problem. Therein lies the misogyny, the tacit endorsement of violence - both verbal and physical.



Salman Khan is not the first person to have used a rape analogy so casually. He won’t be the last to make a statement so deeply rooted in patriarchy just off the cuff. But we often look at comments and words as lesser evils. One person told me on Twitter today, "what’s the big deal? At least he hasn’t raped someone".



That, ostensibly, makes it okay.



That, also is the same kind of person who will use the garb of anonymity of an online identity to target women, to very casually issue rape threats, reprimand women and ask them 'to remember their place'. Who will be emboldened by the faux machismo that Salman wants to portray, who will emulate him and chauvinistically use the horror of rape for describing a loss in a game or a strenuous physical activity. After all, none of them ‘mean it.’



And that's what happened with Sona Mohapatra. She was one person from the film fraternity who minced no words to lambaste Salman and his fans. What was she forced to endure? Exactly the same violence that Salman 'didn't intend' to convey, that his fans maintain was 'not his intention.'



I’m sorry Salman Khan, but your infantile way of trying to promote yourself was in poor taste, cavalier and smacks of insensitivity. It has also tragically already inspired many more to make similarly misinformed, derogatory and sexist remarks.



All you managed to do, is remind us again that it isn’t enough to just stake claim to ‘Being Human’ but you also need to act it.



And unlike you, I mean every word that I have written.