by Russ McSpadden / Earth First! Journal and Newswire

Sea slugs are wild and amazingly skilled lovers. For starters they have both male and female sexual organs which they like to use at the same time.

I’ll let Bernard Picton, curator of marine invertebrates at the National Museums in Northern Ireland explain how it works: [cue sultry music please]

“The genital apparatus is on the right hand side of the body. So two nudibranchs come together and one faces one way and one faces the other way, with the right hand side of their bodies touching.”

Don’t stop Mr. Picton, don’t stop.

“The penis from one fits into the female opening of the other one, and the penis from that one fits into the female opening of the first one, if you see what I mean.”

Oh, I think we see what you mean. These sea slugs are having a way better Valentines Day than just about any other species–and especially tame humans–aren’t they?

“They are both donating sperm to the other one.”

My goodness. But this isn’t all. According to a new report published in the Royal Society’s journal Biology Letters, one particular species of sea slugs, Chromodoris reticulata, has shocked scientists with its ability to dispose of its current penis and regrow another. Its out with the old schlong and in with the new, sort of speak, a feat that’s sure to keep the love-making fresh and varied.

And what does that presumably sexy Mr. Picton think?

“I haven’t seen anything like this before.” Apparently Mr. Picton didn’t watch music videos in the early 90s.

Kinky Sea Slug Voyeurs

The team of Japanese scientists that discovered this also appear to be pretty kinky and voyeuristic. They watched Chromodoris reticulata bump those sweet sweet nasties over 30 separate times.

According to the report, these sea slugs get it on all hot and heavy, lasting between a few seconds and few minutes, after which they push away in spent ecstasy and then shed their penises. They just drop them on the ground and slug off like it was never a part of the family jewels to begin with.



But after 24 hours–the researchers were astonished to discover–these slimy sea stallions can boast a big ole regenerated penis, which is ready for another session of sweet sexual healing.

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