Tracey McLeod-Howe, the new CEO of White Ribbon, said on ABC Radio’s AM program earlier this week that this is a crisis that everyone can play some part in solving. She urged anyone who has the slightest inkling that something might be wrong to reach out. Loading "If you’ve got any way to opening the door to the discussion then take it,” she said. “That first opportunity for a woman or a child to have an open ear to listen to what’s going on for them can be the critical moment that has a life or death result.” McLeod-Howe was also unequivocal about the source of the problem. “Men are the answer to this," she said. "It is a men’s issue.”

She pleaded with men who are ever violent or controlling to reach out for support. “You can call the men’s line, you can talk to your doctor, whatever it is that you need to do to stop this happening because it’s in your hands.” For years we’ve been talking about the fact that at least one woman a week is murdered, usually by a man who claimed to love her. The Counting Dead Women project started getting national coverage with this in 2013. We’ve been throwing numbers and statistics around even longer than that because they prove the tragic and deeply uncomfortable truth that most violence in Australia is committed by men, regardless of the gender of the victim. The first Personal Safety Survey in 2005 found over a million women in Australia had experienced violence from their male partner. Just under 20 per cent of Australian women had experienced sexual violence, and the same number had been stalked. Ten years later the updated survey found those numbers haven’t changed and in every category women were at least five times more likely to suffer violence at the hands of men they know than a stranger. Despite all these years of talking, it feels like howling into the abyss because: who is listening? Where is the outrage and determination to save lives and change the violence women and children are subjected to every day? It’s certainly not there in our federal government, who tell us they take violence against women “very seriously” (the Australian equivalent of “thoughts and prayers”) while they concentrate all their efforts on losing internecine battles and hoping to make up lost votes by dog whistling about terrorism.

Ten people have been killed in so called terrorist incidents in Australia in the last 20 years and at least four of the ten people killed were the perpetrators. There were almost no cases where a terrorist group claimed responsibility and most of the perpetrators had a history of violence against women. Over two thousand women were killed in the last 20 years, the overwhelming majority of them killed by male partners and family members. Loading The federal government allocated around $18 million to family violence in 2018 and just under $300 million to counter terrorism. That’s around $8,000 for every woman killed by male violence and just under $50 million for every person killed by so-called terrorism over the last 20 years. It’s an insanely disproportionate allocation that demonstrates exactly where the priorities are for a male dominated government far more concerned with its inner convulsions than with the genuine dangers to Australia citizens. Just in case anyone needs any more evidence, the bill to prevent abusers being able to cross examine their victims in family court was last piece of legislation due for debate before leadership idiocy dissolved the House two weeks ago. They got through everything else on the schedule before question time that day but closed up shop before that vital bill was debated.

Those two thousand women killed were preventable deaths. The experiences of the millions of women and children who’ve been subjected to male violence is preventable suffering. Change the Story is a national framework for preventing violence against women and their children. It was extensively investigated using evidence-based research from a large number of credible Australian and international organisations. Change the Story contributes to the National Plan to Reduce Violence Against Women and Their Children, a bipartisan commitment of all Australian governments. According to their report, “Although there is no single cause of violence against women and their children, the latest international evidence shows there are certain factors that consistently predict – or drive – higher levels of violence against women. These include beliefs and behaviours reflecting disrespect for women, low support for gender equality and adherence to rigid or stereotypical gender roles, relations and identities.” Changing those beliefs and behaviours takes a huge commitment. Governments have a responsibility in actually taking it seriously, not just mouthing platitudes at a White Ribbon event. Taking violence against women seriously means providing proper funding for crisis services and acting on prevention initiatives like respectful relationships education without turning it into an ideological battle where straight white men sacrifice women’s lives to shore up the #NotAllMen rallying cry. So many women have said all this so many times and we know we’ll be saying it again the next time a woman is killed by a man who claimed to love her. And the next time, and the next time, and the time after that as well.