And, though I giggle every time I see a new MRG submission, something is missing. While I have had my fair share of run-ins with violent, aggressive and blatantly sexist dudes within the movement, the manarchism I struggle with most frequently wouldn’t fit into a pithy meme. It isn’t overt or quotable, but I find it pushing me, and many others, out of spaces where we want to be. The sad reality is that the repeat offenders lurking in our communities are read up on bell hooks and probably enjoyManarchist Ryan Gosling as much as I do.

Meetings are often a great bastion of subtle manarchism, particularly in regards to space. Privilege teaches us to find space and fill it. Often, this means taking space from others.

Sometimes this looks like a beneficiary of male privilege opining on the greatness of feminism and anti-oppression work for 15 minutes, leaving no time for other voices—often those experiencing oppressions—to speak. Other times, this looks like cis-gender men facilitating meetings, executing actions, leading working groups and doing the glamorous work, meanwhile leaving tasks such as cooking, cleanup, childcare and support work to the rest of us.

Manarchism also rears its head when someone—typically not a dude—calls out patriarchal behavior only to be met with resistance. While I have seen old-fashioned name calling, shouting and physical aggression employed by a manarchist getting called out, more often I have been silenced by having my concerns diminished. “I didn’t mean to,” and “You have to understand where I am coming from,” are two examples of how people frequently dodge accountability.