[stilted voice of god/preacher]

In the Year of Our Lord, twenty-fourteen, came, the "Great Salvation of the Homophobes."

Yea, though over many years, they have spread the Good News of Homophobia, today, the Religious Right's greatest gift, is denial.

Now that their most homophobic offspring has been signed into law in Uganda, these men of God must presently seek a different path.

Behold! The Miracle of Denial!

Good Reverend Rick Warren has always been a kind-hearted moderate and never told anti-gay Ugandans that "homosexuality is . . . not a human right."

Most holy Pastor Scott Lively was shocked, shocked that Uganda would pass a law calling for life imprisonment for homosexuals . . . particularly after his scholarly visits speaking to priests, parliamentarians and the powerful-- explaining the evil Gay Agenda.

And, "The Family," a Godly and secretive association, had only the purest intentions when a globe-trotting Senator visited Africa one-hundred-and-eight times, attending prayer breakfasts with the legislation's author . . . and inviting him back to the United States three times.

Forget not, the work of Reverend Lou Engle and Richard Cohen, who through the miracle of post-legislative conversion, can now hardly find Uganda on a map.

And remember, for all eternity, the Good News of Homophobia spread by the most devout Family Research Council and the American Family Association.

May the Miracle of Denial keep the Religious Right pure as they spread the Good News of Homophobia to Uganda, Nigeria, Russia, Latvia, and wherever hatred finds a home.

Now go, witness the Salvation of the Homophobes, as they bathe in the healing waters, of denial.

