It’s a big wall, it’s a great wall, and nothing could make it a better wall – unless perhaps Mexico could be persuaded to pay for it. The wall of framed memorabilia that graces Donald’s Trump office – his museum to himself – is his favourite backdrop for photocalls with visitors, with the doors of his gold lift running a close second. When Michael Gove dropped by to interview the president-elect he too was persuaded to stand in the usual spot, thumb aloft, before this veritable cliff face of self-promotion. But what is all that stuff, and how did Trump come by it?

1 The Sholom Award

One of two that appear on the wall from Jewish organisations. The other, the Tree of Life award, was given to Trump by the Jewish National Fund in 1983, “in appreciation of his outstanding dedication to the cause of American-Israeli friendship”. They had little idea Trump would one day try to put his son-in-law in charge of Middle East peace negotiations. Other recipients of the Tree of Life include Dr Ben Carson and Al Gore.

2 Framed GQ cover, from 1984

The cover line reads “The towering ambition of Donald Trump”, and the article inside was written by Graydon Carter. Two years later, Graydon Carter co-founded Spy magazine, a publication that would only ever refer to Trump as a “short-fingered vulgarian”. The notion that Trump has unusually small hands has persisted ever since, as has the feud that Trump maintains with Carter. Just before Christmas he tweeted: “Has anyone looked at the really poor numbers of @VanityFair magazine. Way down, big trouble, dead! Graydon Carter, no talent, will be out!” The magazine had just published a bad review of the restaurant in Trump Tower.

3 Boomerang

This was given to Trump by a group of business figures known as the Forum Club. “The Comeback of the Decade Award” was presented to Trump at a luncheon in 1995 after Trump’s company had partially recovered from being $8.8bn in debt. The award does not seem to have been given to anyone else before or since – ie, it’s not an actual award. Spy magazine reported that when Trump found out the venue wouldn’t admit the press, he tried to get the luncheon moved somewhere else.

4 Playboy cover

From March 1990. Apparently Trump is one of only about 10 men to grace the cover of Playboy, and he rarely misses an opportunity to pose in front of it, even when being photographed with religious leaders, or Michael Gove. The Playboy model sharing the cover with Trump, Brandi Brandt, is currently serving a six-year sentence for drug-trafficking in Australia, although she has been eligible for parole since November.

5 Framed Variety page

This is the Nielsen TV ratings report from 2004, when The Apprentice was the No 1 rated show in America. Trump was always angered by the fact that the Apprentice never won an Emmy. During the debates, when Hillary Clinton mentioned his past tweets claiming the awards were rigged, Trump said: “Should’ve gotten it.”