Guys, be honest: Do you wish you were bigger? Almost certainly, the answer is yes.

"I think there isn't a guy in the world who hasn't wished his penis were an inch or two longer," says Michael O'Leary, MD, professor of urologic surgery at Harvard Medical School and a urologist at Brigham and Women's Hospital in Boston.

However, after more than a century of generally dubious and sometimes lunatic penis enlargement attempts, there's still not much you can do. Sure, there are lots and lots of supposed options out there -- penis pills, creams, brutal stretching exercises, horrific-looking devices, and penis surgery. Almost none of it works. The few approaches that can work often have modest benefits and serious side effects. How serious? In some cases, erectile dysfunction-serious.

"Trust me, if I knew of a way to safely and effectively increase penis size, I'd be a billionaire," O'Leary tells WebMD. "But I don't. Nobody does."

Still, common sense doesn't stop size-obsessed guys from trying very sketchy treatments on a vital part of their anatomy -- and risking a lot in the process.