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In a disturbing piece published in NY Mag, Michael Sonmore said that he’s okay with his wife having sex with random men because he’s a feminist.The article is titled, “ What Open Marriage Taught One Man About Feminism ” and details Sonmore’s “open” relationship with his wife.It begins with this paragraph (emphasis mine): “As I write this, my children are asleep in their room, Loretta Lynn is on the stereo, and. It’s her second date this week; her fourth this month so far. If it goes like the others,. I won’t explode with anger or seethe with resentment.Sonmore then writes about a realization he had, expletive included: “It wasn’t until my wife mentioned one evening that she’d kissed another man and liked it and wanted to do more than kiss next time that I realized how my status as a Man depended on a single fact: that my wife fucked only me.”According to Sonmore, he realized not letting his wife sleep with other men was part of the Patriarchy: “She didn’t present it as an issue of feminism to me, but after much soul-searching about why the idea of my wife having sex with other men bothered me I came to a few conclusions: Monogamy meant I controlled her sexual expression, and, not to get all women’s-studies major about it, patriarchal oppression essentially boils down to a man’s fear that a woman with sexual agency is a woman he can’t control.”He continues, “We are afraid that when it comes time for sex, they won’t choose us. This petty fear has led us as a culture to place judgments on the entire spectrum of female sexual expression: If a woman likes sex, she’s a whore and a slut; if she only likes sex with her husband or boyfriend, she’s boring and lame; if she doesn’t like sex at all, she’s frigid and unfeeling. Every option is a trap.”Sickeningly, Sonmore writes, “The point is that it should be women who choose, not men — even the men they’re married to. For my wife, the choice between honoring our vows and fulfilling her desires was a false choice, another trap.”Then he explains when he became a feminist: “When my wife told me she wanted to open our marriage and take other lovers, she wasn’t rejecting me, she was embracing herself. When I understood that, I finally became a feminist.”