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Involuntary celibacy (or incel) is a non-technical descriptive term of the state of a person who has not established an intimate relationship or engaged in sexual intercourse for reasons other than voluntary celibacy or sexual abstinence. The term is used especially for people who, despite general expectations, have had little to no sexual or romantic experience.

edit] Definition

An involuntarily celibate person is someone who fails to initiate or sustain a sexual or romantic relationship, despite his/her desire to experience such a relationship. Afflicted people may suffer from loneliness, frustration, and depression.

Historian Elizabeth Abbott, in her book The History of Celibacy, devotes one chapter to involuntary celibates. She includes in this category a wide variety of people:[1]

Those in social circumstances that deny them access to potential partners (for example, being imprisoned, or living in a society with skewed sex ratios caused by the death of many men in a war, or preferential abandonment or abortion of females - the latter is particularly severe in China and India [ 2 ] [ 3 ] )

) Those without access to either birth control or the monetary resources to deal with a child

Those denied the right to marry by social norms (for example, widows in certain Hindu communities, or younger sisters in societies that demanded the oldest be married first)

Women whose families lacked money for the dowries required by their society.

People who would lose their jobs if they were known to be sexually active (for example, apprentices and journeymen in certain trades in Medieval Europe, or certain Western domestic servant or educator positions prior to the previous centuries).

Men castrated against their will.

Because of social pressures for people in their mid twenties to have had at least experienced sexual interaction with the opposite sex in some form of or another, involuntary celibacy more often than not results in a significant increase of risk of depression or anxiety and sexual frustration that can ultimately lead to acts of self-harm and even suicide.

Involuntary celibates are typically at a complete or near-complete lack for sex or intimate physical connection for several years and even decades at a time, not merely weeks or months. Moreover, incels are also usually at a complete lack of opportunities for sexual advancement to begin with: i.e., it is not that opportunities exist but are not taken, but rather, it is that circumstances for whatever reason (sometimes inexplicably) fail to materialise at any time for the person at all. And although depression and psychological problems sometimes do underpin incel and must be overcome before incel can be dealt with, other incels are indeed socially outgoing, otherwise well-developed in human interaction, et cetera, yet continue not to "get any" [sex] for years on end. Obviously, a complete or near-complete lack of sex of this 'totally dry' nature makes for a serious psychological problem for the estimated less than 5% of the general population of age that experiences it[citation needed]. Involuntary celibates have an unusually high mortality rate compared to the rest of the population. [4]

There is controversy concerning the duration of the celibacy needed to qualify for the label of involuntary celibacy. Some people classify themselves as involuntarily celibate because they are not in a relationship at the moment, though they have been in the past. Critics of this view suggest that the proper label for this is simply being "single", which, unlike "involuntarily celibate," is in common usage and does not carry potential social stigma, while involuntary celibacy is a more serious condition. Donnelly and Burgess used a floor figure of six months of involuntary celibacy in their study design. Others apply the term only to those who have never been involved in a sexual and/or romantic relationship. Some critics also include medical celibates who are physically unable to engage in sexual activities due to disabilities, serious injuries and other health problems along with the side effects of chemotherapy and prescription drugs.

edit] Research

A study was initiated in 1998 by researchers from Georgia State University when a member of an online discussion group for involuntary celibates inquired about current research on the subject.[5] The study, Involuntary celibacy: A life course analysis,[6] was published in 2001 in the Journal of Sex Research, produced by the Society for the Scientific Study of Sexuality. A news article reporting on the study indicated that involuntary celibacy can lead to anger and depression.[7] Involuntary celibacy: A life course analysis has also been included in an anthology of scholarly literature.[8]

In a March 6, 2004 letter by Brian G. Gilmartin, who performed extensive studies on "love-shyness", a form of involuntarily celibacy, he noted that "as many as 40 percent of the cases of severely love-shy men would qualify for a diagnosis of Asperger's syndrome", a proportion supported in his 1987 book.[9]

edit] Consequences

In the media, (especially, on situation comedies) limitations and disappointment are ennobled along with the indefinite postponement of sexual and romantic gratification. This also includes the delay of dating, marriage and sexual activity at key transition points during adolescence and young adulthood. Therefore, involuntary celibacy is also ennobled in the entertainment media.[10][11] However, conditions and behaviors associated with involuntary celibacy may include depression and all of its consequences. Also, involuntary celibacy could lead to self-absorption and an unhealthy preoccupation with sexual activities.[12] While sexual abstinence diminishes the risk of contracting sexually transmitted diseases (STD) it may necessitate relinquishment of potential health benefits of sex. There have been numerous studies indicating that excessive repression of the sexual instinct leads to an increase in the overall level of aggression in a given society. Societies forbidding nonmarital sex are plagued by acts of rage, and tend to have higher rates of crime and violence. [13] There may be a link between sexual repression and aggression, insensitivity, criminal behaviour, and a greater likelihood of killing and torturing enemies. Some involuntary celibates may binge drink or use drugs either as a substitute for satisfying sexual relations or as a way to anesthetize themselves sexually.[14][15][16][17] Involuntary celibacy may also result in an affected individual experiencing an existential crisis.

edit] Criticism

Very little research has been published on involuntary celibacy, and few statistics are available, although it is finding its way onto university syllabi.[18][19] It does not appear to be a concept or a phenomenon taken seriously by those who do not experience it. Relatively little research is available on the subject regardless of the few sources listed here. Most focus on voluntary and medical celibacy.[citation needed]

edit] Contributing factors

Lack of sex-appeal, social skills or charisma, disability, schizophrenia,[20] socio-economic factors, such as homelessness, poverty, the lack of a higher education, and unemployment[21] often play a role in preventing courtship. Additionally a lack of suitable partners, or discomfort with the idea of sex outside of an established "relationship" may also be contributing factors. Men are also prevented from having sexual intercourse due to erectile dysfunction (E.D.).

In many societies, heterosexual men are traditionally expected to assume the assertive role in pursuing the opposite sex. This includes risking rejection. Courtship is competitive among single, eligible men, who typically employ verbal and non-verbal strategies and tactics to seduce women. Proficiency at these tactics is called having "game" in American slang, and this is frequently equated with confidence, a trait that is popularly valued in men by women. It is the belief of some in the seduction community that confidence with women exists independently of intelligence, education, status, money, or talent and success in other areas of life.

Involuntary celibacy may also be perpetuated by cognitive biases and/or negative explanatory styles such as learned helplessness or fundamental attribution error. Learned helplessness occurs when, after experiencing repeated rejection, an individual is conditioned to assume all other potential prospects will also reject them. Every "signal" of interest may be dismissed, even when the object of one's attraction is genuinely interested. "Actual helplessness" occurs when there are no signals of interest to be misinterpreted. The Fundamental Attribution Error can cause individuals to see people as being mean or shallow towards them when they have experienced a rejection of some form, instead of explaining the behavior through situational or environmental factors. Unmarried individual adults living in rural or suburban areas are often unable to find a suitable partner due to social and marriage patterns.

Low-status heterosexual men may become involuntarily celibate due to polygamy and serial monogamy by high-status men, leaving a shortage of attractive, eligible, fertile women.[22]

Beautiful women (subjective) may remain perpetually single and become involuntarily celibate because they do not take the assertive role in pursuing the opposite sex. Many heterosexual men disqualify them as "marriage material" based on the stereotype that beautiful women would not be good mothers and are less likely to be faithful as wives and are most likely to seek divorce.[23][24] Also, a man may not pursue a beautiful woman due to his fear of being rejected as well as his own insecurities.

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edit] References