Cari gave birth to twins when she was only 23 weeks pregnant—the edge of viability for newborns. Four years later, the kids are still dealing with medical complications, and Cari and her husband Jay are struggling with residual guilt and an ongoing sense of helplessness. They wonder if parenthood will ever feel “normal.”Motherhood Sessions is a production of Gimlet Media. It’s produced by Peter Bresnan, Molly Donahue, and Lauren Silverman. Our editors are Devon Taylor and Nazanin Rafsanjani. Mixing and music by Emma Munger.If you or someone you know is experiencing depression or anxiety during pregnancy, or in the postpartum period, contact Postpartum Support International at (800) 944-4773. If you or a family member are worried about safety, get help right away by calling the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255, or dialing 911.