The Friends of Triangle Park announced today that the park will be reopening this spring as the east coast’s first marijuana community garden. The announcement comes after months of negotiations with Philadelphia Planning Commission representatives.

“We’ve been tending to the garden here since it was founded in 2006. I am the one who picked out the Siberian irises,” said Bethel DiGiorgio, a retired elementary school teacher and life-long resident of South Philadelphia. “But when I heard it was going to be turned into a cannabis garden, my heart practically stopped. My dealer just moved to Portland last month, so instead of trucking it all the way to NoLibs, I can grow some dank ass herb just twenty paces out my own front door!”

Triangle Park has had an interesting history, currently in possession of Stuart Schlaffman, local philanthropist and owner of the nearby Condom Kingdom store. “Condoms and ganja are the perfect match, so I’m glad that the Friends of Triangle Park and I could negotiate a space that works for both of us. I’m happy to provide the good residents with a place they can all cultivate their kush,” he said. It is unknown how much Sclaffman will charge for plots in the garden, but he is expected to make serious bank.

And as for the legality? “I dare them to come to our garden,” says DiGiorgio. “I dare the police and the FBI and all their other thugs to come down to South Philadelphia and see how we put our Second Amendment Rights to use.” To be clear, the Philadelphia Exquirer and its subsidiaries do not endorse any sort of violence.

When asked for comment, Mayor Nutter’s office sent a brief response: “420 Blaze it.”

Ground breaking is expected next April.