by Steve On Sens



T'was a stormy April night in the nation's capital. I had just returned from another evening of beekeeping when I got the fax. "Chet, Luke and Brochenski are all out. Lower body injury. Day to day." Is what it read. "You're in Steve" was written on the last line.

T'was a stormy April night in the nation's capital. I had just returned from another evening of beekeeping when I got the fax. "Chet, Luke and Brochenski are all out. Lower body injury. Day to day." Is what it read. "You're in Steve" was written on the last line.

1st Period





15:25 - PK Subban misses a hit on Milan Michalek leading to a Wiercioch shot that redirects off of Ales Hemsky into the back of the net. 2-0 Ottawa





Subban is a -2 tonight. Remember kids, Plus/Minus doesn't matter unless the Montreal Canadiens are bad at it. Back to the game!





14:10 - Chris Neil makes an uncharacteristically smart play, head-manning the puck to Mika Zibanejad who makes a swift pass to Zack Smith who fires it into the back of the net for his second of the game!

3-0 Ottawa





3-0 lead! This one's secure! See you guys next game!

just a reminder that the "j" in budaj is silent, much like habs fans right now

— Chet Sellers (@chet_sellers) April 4, 2014



But wait!





13:20 - Jared Tinordi destroys Ales Hemsky. Hemsky's body goes flying into the Hem-SKY! (I'm never going to be allowed to do a game summary ever again). [Editor's Note: You're not.]





12:30 - Andrei Markov fires a puck on Anderson from behind the net. It bounces off Anderson's leg and in. Never seen a defenceman score on a Senators goalie from behind the net before! 3-1 Ottawa

smart move by anderson. the three-goal lead versus the habs is the most dangerous lead you can have

— Chet Sellers (@chet_sellers) April 4, 2014



10:43 - Weaver floats a shot on net from the point which beats Anderson. It's happening again folks. 3-2 Ottawa





8:59 - Bournival and MacArthur collide at the Montreal blue line. MacArthur is down. "This season couldn't be any worse," cry Sens fans worldwide. "Yes it can," says David Clarkson in an alternate universe in which he signs a 7 year $50 million contract with Ottawa.





6:30 - Craig Anderson thinks he may have the puck but doesn't. Panic ensues but the puck is eventually covered.





4:08 - Puck bounces over Eric Gryba's stick leading to a Max Pacioretty breakaway goal. 3-3.





Steve's Thoughts:

This game was on pace to be 36-0 Ottawa at one point. What the hell did I sign up for? 50% of Senators defencemen in this game have their own novelty product. Beer, coffee, duck calls 2nd Period

17:58 - Clarke MacArthur clips Jared Tinordi with a high stick. Kyle Turris tries to join MacArthur in the box but is promptly stopped by officials.





15:51 - Lars Eller bats puck out of mid-air into a wide open net. 4-3 Montreal.





15:40 - Neil scores or something. The goal is called off because a Habs player fell into Budaj. This game is going to get spicy.





15:25 - As I type that last sentence, Erik Karlsson gets in a wrestling match with Alex Galchenyuk.

Let's not focus on the hate. Let's focus on the love shared by Hemsky and Gallagher. pic.twitter.com/yMZxPU7YHV

— Bonk's Mullet (@BonksMullet) April 5, 2014





DON'T YOU TOUCH ERIK CONDRA

— Brochenski (@Brochenski) April 5, 2014

11:57 - Erik Condra is pushed onto Peter Budaj. PK Subban takes exception and starts tossin punches at Player 22.

11:00 - Spezza has 3 point blank chances. 2 are stopped and 1 is blocked. *Corsi rains down from sky*





8:55 - Kyle Turris hits the post harder than Glen Sather hits cheque books in free agency.





6:45 - Eric Gryba hits Daniel Briéré which draws Tinordi over to fight. Ottawa goes to the powerplay.





4:35 - Max Pacioretty strips the puck off of Patrick Wiercioch who goes on another breakaway beating Anderson five hole. At least this collapse didn't happen in the final 3 minutes! 5-3 Montreal.









Chris Neil waves goodbye to the Sens' playoff hopes 4:03 - Chris Neil fights 4 Habs players. Given Neil's history, I felt the need to specify that the players did indeed play for Montreal.

Look on the bright side kids: we are improving our 2nd round pick.

— Adnan (@sens_adnan) April 5, 2014



Steve's Thoughts

Fighting when losing doesn't look as cool as fighting while winning 6-1. This game is starting to remind me of the pre-season game I went to when 2 fans started fighting in the stands. Except these fans are Eric Gryba and Jared Tinordi and Section 302 is the ice. Erik Karlsson still looks beautiful when fighting Alex Galchenyuk. Karlsson was totally deadpan throughout that entire tussle. pic.twitter.com/W6au8TJ8oC

— Bonk's Mullet (@BonksMullet) April 5, 2014

3rd Period

18:51 - Max Pacioretty takes a one-timer and beats Anderson. 6-3 Montreal.





14:55 - Condra hits the post harder than Chris Neil hits blue lines before the puck crosses. [Editor's Note: You're still fired.]





12:15 - My younger cousin asks me if I think the Sens will tie it up. "No," I respond, crushing her dreams in the same fashion that Patrick Lalime crushed mine.











7-3 Montreal 10:46 - David Desharnais out-waits Craig Anderson and buries the puck. Anderson stays in.



10:40 - Uuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...



And I thought the Sens were the ones blowing it! 10:40 - Uuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...



5:53 - Mika Zibanejad takes a Turris feed and goes five hole on Budaj. Time for the comeback story of the year! 7-4 Montreal







Tonight's Bonk's Mullet Game Recap: *makes fart noises*

— Luke Peristy (@LukePeristy) April 5, 2014 2:45 - CBC shows clip of bells ringing on Parliament Hill. Symbolizing the time ticking down on Milan Michalek's time with the Senators.

Steve's Closing Thoughts Anderson played like a combination of Pascal Leclaire, Martin Gerber, and Jani Hurme. We might not make the playoffs It's not too late to buy Elmira Jackals tickets They are also missing the Playoffs Thanks for reading and enjoy the rest of the night (if that's possible).





17:32 - Zack Smith takes a puck in the slot and buries it on Budaj like Paul MacLean buries a top 6 forward.