Sometime rapper and full-time egomaniac Kanye West has claimed in an interview for BBC Radio One that being black is holding him back despite being a self-made man worth an estimated £100m, with yearly earnings of £20m and music sales that have seen him become the sixth best-selling solo artist of all time.

West’s snit was prompted by the fact that he feels disrespected as a designer of trainers and his being told by one designer at Paris Fashion Week that if wanted to attend their show he shouldn’t attend others.

Happily for the world West has somehow managed to retain a keen sense of self in the face of such terrible adversity stating: “I brought ten years of product that has added to humanity” and “I am God’s vessel. But my greatest pain in life is that I will never be able to see myself perform live.”

A member of West’s entourage who asked to remain job-savingly anonymous had this to say about their boss’ suffering.

“The problem is that KW has no training in fashion and he’s kind of a douche. There are talented designers of all races who’ve put in years of hard work to be good at what they do and KW thinks that because he’s rich and famous he should be allowed to step on them all and be given a seat at the top table. He has a massive problem with the n-word – really gets agitated when someone says no to him.

The source warned that further outbursts and accusations of racism were to be expected as West continues to be thwarted in his ambitions.

‘Yeah, the boss wants to be a heart surgeon. He walks into hospitals and demands to be allowed to operate but no one’ll let him do it. They say it’s because he’s a college dropout and not a qualified surgeon but KW reckons it’s whitey keeping him down.”

“We are literally never going to hear the end of it when he fails to get elected Pope.”

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