As you can possibly tell from the picture, my drive is directly in front of my house. There's no grey area about who this space belongs to.

I was incensed about it. How does someone do that? Why would they do that? How could anybody be so brazen as to park directly on someone's drive? I posted about it on Twitter and asked people what I should do.

Plenty of suggestions came in. Let the tyres down. Scratch a swastika onto their bonnet. Hide a dead body in the boot. They were all admirable ideas. But once I'd calmed down, I came up with something that appealed to me far more.