Justice: Astros should consider bringing in Bonds COMMENTARY

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Hello, Barry, this is Drayton. Are you ready to be a champion? The Astros need a left fielder. I know the name of a good one. He’s rested and ready. He’ll bring a buzz to the ballpark, too. He would suddenly make the Astros baseball’s most interesting team. What’s wrong with having a little buzz? Why should the Dallas Cowboys have all the fun? Barry Lamar Bonds would be a perfect fit for the Astros. Is there one good reason not to sign him? No, there’s not. Oh sure, some people don’t like him. These are people that don’t know him, but still. To say such a thing presumes you know the players on the team now. You don’t know them. You can pretend to know them, but you don’t. Baseball is a bottom-line business. Bonds would make the Astros better. If Drayton McLane really and truly wants to be a champion, he’d bring in the best offensive player on earth. Our local nine has been winning. Just as the team is closing in on .500, one of its two best players, Carlos Lee, goes down with a broken finger. What would the Rockets do? They just went for a guy that has done far worse things than Barry. Some of you have compared Ron Artest to Barry Bonds. I’m going to presume you’re having a bad day. Trust me when I tell you Barry is vastly overrated as a bad guy in the clubhouse. He’s a little prickly at times, a little standoffish, but who among us isn’t? Jeff Kent didn’t always whistle when he walked in the clubhouse, and he has turned out to be one of the all-time best guys to have on a baseball team. Besides, Barry would be thrilled to get another shot. He thinks he has been blackballed. Maybe he has. That’s beside the point. Even if commissioner Bud Selig doesn’t want him in the game, it’s Drayton’s job to do what’s best for his club. Go for it, Drayton. Since Barry got big, there’s almost no argument about his being the best offensive player ever. He changes games unlike any other player. Opposing pitchers began preparing for him an inning before he was scheduled to hit. If Cecil Cooper batted Barry third, Lance Berkman suddenly would be leading the world in RBI opportunities. The Astros wouldn’t have an empty seat in the house, and you know how many hot dogs that will sell. Hear that sound? That’s the cash register ringing. Rule the airwaves With one move, the Astros would blow Michael Phelps, Manny Ramirez and Brett Favre right off ESPN. Drayton would be the man. Think of the TV time for you, Drayton. For me, too, but that’s beside the point. The entire country would be talking about the Astros. If Drayton is unsure about Barry, he should poll his players and manager. Ask Cooper if he’d like to have Barry in his lineup. Ask Berkman and Roy Oswalt if they’d like to have Barry as a teammate. Don’t tell me that Barry used steroids and lied about them. So we’re now getting religion on steroids? Listen, we’re all going to have to wrap our minds around steroids and their impact on the game. I admit to not being there yet. This isn’t about putting Barry in the Hall of Fame. This might shock you, but Barry isn’t the only big leaguer who apparently used steroids. What makes Barry — and apparently Roger Clemens — different is that they got unlucky. Their dealers got busted by the feds. They were exposed while others were allowed to keep their secrets. We know things about Barry and Roger that we don’t know about others. Plenty of other big names used steroids, too, and every time there’s a knock on the door, they might wonder if the boys and girls in windbreakers and badges are going to be there. Other big names are going to be revealed. To think it’s just Bonds and Clemens is folly. Speaking of Clemens, he dug his own grave. If he’d confirmed everything in the Mitchell Report, the reaction would have been a collective yawn. There’s no way 21 injections contributed significantly to 354 victories. Clemens set off on a course that may very well land him in prison. If Drayton passes on Barry because he’s worried about his franchise’s reputation, I’ve got some bad news for him. The Astros have no reputation. No one outside Houston cares. Inside the industry, their reputation isn’t great. The industry thinks Drayton does a lot of dumb stuff. Like refusing to spend on draft choices and running off a great general manager. Baseball people whisper that he’s a nightmare to work for. There’s not a single valid reason not to sign Bonds. Because he might be a jerk? Are you kidding me? I hate to tell you this, but we’ve had some players who drank too much and maybe weren’t completely faithful about their marriage vows. That’s real life. The home clubhouse is no different than your office or mine. Cloud of investigation It’s only silly people like me who sometimes put ballplayers on a pedestal when they’re just normal men with normal weaknesses who happen to be able to do amazing physical things. The government investigated Bonds for 21/2 years before indicting him. Drayton has admitted to being bothered that the government devoted so much time and money to bringing down a baseball player. Beware, Roger Clemens and Miguel Tejada. You’re on their list, too, and if Barry’s case is an example, they’ll take however long they need to build a case. Sleep well, boys. Someone could be going through your garbage at this very moment. We’re getting off topic here. The Astros need a hitter, and Barry might be the greatest who ever lived. A no-brainer, right? Frankly, the Astros have a reputation for wanting guys who look and sound alike. Barry isn’t like any of the other Astros. Nothing wrong with that. Let’s do it. richard.justice@chron.com