BoJack Horseman is one of my favorite shows currently on the air, and it potentially tops the list. It features some of the funniest throwaway jokes and sight gags since the golden age of The Simpsons. The wordplay is nothing short of astounding. The jokes in just the names of people, places, and things are too numerous to catch without multiple viewings (and I'm sure I haven't caught them all). And somehow, while managing to consistently be hilarious, it is also simultaneously one of the saddest things I have ever seen. I cannot think of a more raw, intense, honest portrayal of someone who is deeply, painfully depressed. Don Draper and Tony Soprano were great, but we never got into their heads in quite the way we do with BoJack. It hurts to watch sometimes, because it is just so shockingly true to life. Except that it's about a talking Hollywoo(d) horse person.

All of the main characters are complex and interesting in their own right. In their totally bizarre world, they all seem real. The humor and pathos complement each other perfectly. The fourth season followed couch-surfer extraordinaire Todd Chavez's exploration of his newly realized asexuality. It is handled with compassion and nuance, and, again, it feels real. It's the first time to my knowledge that there has been an expressly asexual character in a television show. However, I could be wrong, and people with much more knowledge on the subject have discussed this and will discuss it better than I ever could. What I do feel comfortable getting into is one of the other recurring motifs of Todd's incredible life: FOOD.

I had not thought about it much until the fourth season included some truly spectacular food items, but Todd spends a sizable portion of his screentime either eating food or talking about food. A lot of it is pretty mundane; he eats a lot of cereal; he likes finger food, burgers, and pizza; he enjoys fruit-filled colorful mixed drinks in hurricane glasses. Todd has also shown some really inspired food ideas that are worth mentioning specifically. They don't necessarily further the plot, but they certainly give the viewer a glimpse inside the mind of Todd. He might be some kind of junk food genius. With dishes reconstructed and photographed by the inimitable Sarah B. Carey, I taste tested some of the most exciting food experiments that Todd has come up with during the first four seasons of the show, and I rated them out of a possible five stars. Whenever meat was involved, we used a veggie substitute. You do what you have to do.





Cotton candy dipped in Froot Loops style cereal - Season 1, Episode 4





Pre-credits scene. This is Todd's BREAKFAST. He is an absolute madman. He eats a lot of cereal. He's eating cereal immediately when his character is introduced. He's eating cereal in the show's opening credits. As for this "meal", it was honestly not nearly as awful as I expected it to be. I was prepared for a melted disgusting rainbow puddle, but Chef Sarah managed to make this sugar madness hold together in a manageable way. The taste was, unsurprisingly, basically just sugar. It was almost unbearably sweet. I did not pick up much flavor from the cereal. That being said, the texture was surprisingly good. The fluffy airiness of the cotton candy was really pleasant with the crunch of the cereal. The cotton candy actually held onto the loops with just a tiny amount of the milk, but for the sake of accuracy, I tried some dipped in the milk as well. It was decidedly less good. Rather than just melting the cotton candy, it turned it into a weird jelly. The cereal became squishy very quickly, and the texture of the sugar slop jelly was not good at all. I can really only recommend the relatively dry version of this dish, if one is so inclined to try it. If sickening amounts of sugar are your thing, then dive in!

2/5 stars





"FaWaffle" - Season 1, Episode 12





Todd's concept art for this dish closes out his arc for the first season. It's a great note to go out on. After the idea for the "Smoodie" (a mood you can drink) falls through, Todd comes up with this. FaWaffles should start popping up more in restaurants and food trucks. It's just a falafel sandwich that substitutes a waffle for pita as the vessel for the fillings. It is so simple and stupid and perfect. Sarah put homemade falafel patties, lettuce, tomato, cucumber, and a thick garlicky tahini sauce on a massive waffle. We actually chose our wafflemaker based on this specific dish. It makes what can either be one huge waffle, or four smaller waffles. The sandwich could easily have been split and shared. It was incredibly filling. But alas, for science, I ate the whole damn thing. I regret nothing. The bit of sweetness in the waffle really complimented the savory fillings. The giant pockets in the waffle held the sauce really well, and they actually helped prevent losing said sauce to dripping. If I see this on a menu somewhere, I am definitely ordering it.

5/5 stars





"Mice Krispies" with "Alpine Sweat" - Season 2, Episode 2









This is clearly supposed to be Rice Krispies with Mountain Dew. I hope everyone reached the same conclusion. That's the dish recreated here, anyway! We actually used generic brand versions of each ingredient. This, again, was not nearly as awful as I assumed it would be. The liquid mixing with the cereal made a much louder sound than I expected, and this is with the knowledge that they are both relatively noisy types of food and liquid. It was pretty unsettling to look at as it sat there. The entire surface bubbled and quivered as if it was alive, struggling to breathe. I couldn't really see the liquid under the cereal, so it was just a sickly, shining puffed rice mass undulating in the bowl. I did not really want to eat this in the first place, but I really did not want to while looking at it. Much to my surprise, the taste was not that bad initially. It was very effervescent, and the less saturated cereal only had a tiny hint of the soda flavor. Once I got down to the soda pool, things changed. It was a terrible soup of mushy cereal in neon green sugar piss. Each spoonful was more upsetting than the last. It was really awful, and I poured most of the poison down the drain. I also ate this immediately after eating the cotton candy cereal concoction, so I ingested more sugar in the span of about half an hour than I had in the entire week prior, and I felt really disgusting afterward.

1/5 stars





Nachos in a baseball glove - Season 2, Episode 6





I was pretty concerned about the logistics of this one. We fudged it a bit and lined the glove with wax paper. SORRY. I'm trying to eat a disgusting mess, not make a disgusting mess. Todd pitches (no pun intended) an idea for a "bagel catcher," which actually turns out to just be a baseball glove. We tested that as well, and a baseball glove can indeed be used to a catch a bagel. Later in the same episode, Todd is seen just hanging out eating nachos out of the glove for some reason. This actually worked pretty spectacularly. Food wise, it was super simple. The cheese sauce Sarah made had the perfect consistency I expect from ballpark nachos, and it was actually delicious. It seems like something you might actually get served at a baseball game: Free Glove Day (with purchase of nachos). I really enjoyed that I was able to walk around and eat the nachos without feeling like I was holding a plate of nachos. I had BECOME the plate. What this dish lacks in creativity, ingredients-wise, it definitely makes up for in presentation and taste. Play ball!

3.5/5 stars





Spaghetti and meatballs in a baseball glove - Season 2, Episode 6





This was from the same episode as above. Todd was really trying to make the most of having that baseball glove, I guess. Again, we lined the glove with wax paper, because we are cowards. I was pretty concerned with how this would go down, mostly because Todd eats this dish with chopsticks. Normally, I'm fine with chopsticks. I've never had any trouble eating with chopsticks, but for some reason I was having some bizarre cognitive dissonance associated with the thought of eating spaghetti and meatballs with them. I was really worried I would screw up, and in trying not to make a mess, overcorrect and end up throwing a baseball glove full of spaghetti across the room. Fortunately, this did not happen. It was fine. Everything was fine. The spaghetti was fine. The beanballs Sarah made to replace the meatballs were great, as was the sauce. The dissonance carried over into my eating experience though. It just seemed wrong to eat it like that. The chopsticks and the glove really threw me off on this one. I learned I'm kind of a spaghetti snob. But it worked fine. I guess it was all fine.

3/5 stars





Hotdogs wrapped in a pizza - Season 3, Episode 6





This is one of those Todd food moments that just happens incidentally to the rest of the action at the time, but it is highly indicative of the subtle genius of who he is. Conceptually, this works great. Sarah made a little personal pizza that was cooked through exactly enough that it wasn't doughy and it was still foldable. This is really critical to the success of this dish. Three jumbo veggie dogs fit perfectly into the pizza taco. The thing was so packed that if the crust had been any harder, it would have just squeezed all of the filling out and been a terrible sad mess. When Todd attempts to eat his hotdog-pizza-taco, the dogs all slide out the back. It's a very disappointing moment. Also, this is one of the most filling things I've ever eaten. It was a very real challenge to finish this very small pizza taco. I commend Todd's bravery for attempting this dish with such large hotdogs and pizza. Flavor-wise, however, this did not quite do it for me. I like hotdogs, but I love pizza. This could possibly be a game-changer with Italian sausage or something. Hotdogs just don't seem right in this arrangement. Sarah disagrees and thinks this is absolutely perfect. What do I know?

3.5/5 stars





Neapolitan ice cream on a cheeseburger - Season 4, Episode 1





This was the moment when I really started to think about what Todd had been doing with food all this time. Watching him casually plop ice cream on top of a burger had my mind reeling. Was this something he had done before? Was it just instinct? Why didn't anyone ever question him when he did these things? I do not have any answers to these questions, but I am shocked and delighted to say that this thing was fucking awesome. It might be the pinnacle of the sweet/savory and hot/cold combination. Sarah made a black bean burger topped with cheddar cheese, red onion, tomato, and lettuce. Todd used a sesame seed bun, but we only had pretzel buns available. It almost immediately started to become a mess, which I typically hate, but it was so good I didn't even care. The layering of veggies on the burger actually helped to keep the ice cream from melting as fast as it otherwise would have. Each of the three ice cream flavors was distinct, and the strawberry was especially bonkers in combination with everything else. There were no other condiments on the one I had, so I cannot speak to how they would change the flavor profile. I don't think they're necessary. I cannot recommend this burger enough. This is life-affirming junk food of the highest caliber.

5/5 stars





Churro-flavored waffles - Season 4, Episode 1





Todd is very busy in the opening episode of season 4. He spends a fair amount of time eating kettle corn while stuck on an out-of-control drone. This is after his girlfriend breaks up with him. It makes sense that he needs some sleep after all that. However, there can be no rest for the creative genius. He lurches out of a dream and shouts "churro-flavored waffles!" What was happening in that dream? Why was it frightening? Does his inspiration come with the cost of troubled sleep? We may never know. What I do know, however, is that these waffles were pretty dang good! Sarah made her regular waffles with some cinnamon mixed into the batter, then rolled the waffles in more cinnamon and sugar. They were topped with maple syrup, and the whole thing was so simple, I don't know why I haven't been having it my whole life. Other than the amount of sugar involved. I would eat these every morning until the diabetes killed me.

4.5/5 stars





S'mores in a baguette - Season 4, Episode 3





This, for some reason, is the food item that Todd actually singles out as his million-dollar idea. Sarah and I disagreed on how the construction should go. I immediately assumed it meant using a baguette instead of graham crackers to contain the marshmallows and chocolate, while Sarah imagined that the graham crackers would be inside the baguette. I think either interpretation is valid, given that it's never actually seen in the show. Who am I to decide? I'll leave that to more learned minds. Sarah made both anyway, and I have to say it doesn't seem to matter either way, because neither was particularly exciting. Without the graham crackers, the bread simply overwhelmed the flavor. With the graham crackers added, not only did the bread overwhelm the flavor, but also graham cracker crumbs exploded everywhere. They became a fine dust that I had the displeasure of inhaling while choking down singed vegan marshmallows. At best it was bland, at worst it tried to kill me, and I frankly wish I'd just eaten the baguette on its own. Maybe we were both wrong?

2/5 stars





So there you have it, a sampling of culinary delights, courtesy of Todd: the master of munchies, the snack savant. This list is by no means exhaustive. Todd eats entire plates of spaghetti in a single bite, covers french fries in absurd amounts of ketchup, and he seems to love all varieties of Woofles brand chips. He takes bubble baths in champagne, stores sandwich halves under his hat, and has many other weird and wonderful food-related moments. Todd is a true maverick and an inspiration, and I can't wait to see what else he comes up with.