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In response to Ronan’s recent post about financial transparency, Steve and I looked into our seer stones and decided to share a little bit of what would actually happen if the Church’s accounting books were made public. BRACE YOURSELVES!



As always, these rankings are authoritative.



Dark chocolate eaten by the Apostles accounts for 7% of total tithing receipts Plastic sacrament cups are cheaper than paper Bishop Monson may have been great at visiting the widows, but his ward Christmas parties were always over budget Approximately $2.8M per year spent on fixing stage curtains in meetinghouses after kids swing on them Despite an annual allocation of $483 billion, BYU football totally sucks Huge amounts of R&D spent developing popcorn/apricot tree hybrids between 1984-1993 At least 184 unauthorized color copies were made in the Brigham City 2nd Ward library during Q3 2011 Massive writedown in the late 70s from the failed Lamanite Astronaut Program Annual payments of $163,271 to the Catholic Church, ledger line reads “for Bruce’s book” Building City Creek Mall was actually a really good idea

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[1] Honorable Mentions