Dear Greg Hunt, Australian Minister for the Environment,

Our Great Barrier Reef is sick. As you are probably aware, a recent survey revealed that it is currently undergoing the worst mass bleaching event we’ve seen so far, triggered by warming sea temperatures. The survey found that only about seven percent of the reef has escaped bleaching—far more severe than the forty percent that had escaped it last time. North of Port Douglas, over eighty percent of the reef can be described as severely bleached and less than one percent has escaped bleaching. Of bleached corals in the north and central regions, we’re seeing thirty-five percent of them die. In some areas it’s over fifty percent. And counting.

But Australians are an honest people and we believe the time has come to stop misrepresenting The Great Barrier Reef to the rest of the world. Just as our ailing reef cannot sustain its colour and vibrancy, we believe the reef can no longer sustain the title of ‘Great’. As such we ask you, 2016’s ‘Best Minister in the World’, to officially rename The Great Barrier Reef to something more suitable, like The Okay-ish Barrier Reef.

Here is a selection of other appropriate names:

The "Great" Barrier Reef

The Late Barrier Reef

The Minimalist Barrier Reef

The Bit Disappointing Barrier Reef

The Barrier Reef Formerly Known As Great

The Not-Like-Finding-Nemo Barrier Reef

The Great Barrier To Jobs And Growth And Growthy Jobs (We can actually keep 'Great' in this one)

Adani Presents: The Adani Barrier Reef™ by Adani

We feel any of these names more accurately represent what the world can expect to see off the coast of Queensland now and in the years to come. You may find even more appropriate names added in the comments of this petition.

Finally, as global warming continues, we are set to see the damage creep further and further south until we have an endless graveyard of bone-white pointy fossils smothered in algae. So should you be re-elected, we ask you to schedule some time in your calendar a few years from now to rename it again.

Thanks a lot.