When she became Alabama’s first lady, Dianne Bentley was afraid of her new life.

Despite the prestige of the role of being the governor's wife, the longtime Tuscaloosa resident’s self-described inferiority complex and aversion to attention had always made her feel like she had no worth. In fact, Bentley’s shyness proved an obstacle when speaking during ceremonies or to large audiences as first lady.

In 2015, Bentley’s life changed when she left her husband of 50 years, then-Gov. Robert Bentley, in the wake of a scandal tied to his alleged affair with his senior political adviser, Rebekah Mason. The aftermath and questions about malfeasance resulted in Robert Bentley's resignation after he pleaded guilty to failure to file a major contribution report and knowingly converting campaign contributions to personal use.

After filing for divorce, Dianne Bentley left Montgomery and, for the most part, public life.

However, in a process that has taken more than two years, Dianne Bentley is slowly re-entering the community, championing issues like help for victims of domestic violence. Through this, Dianne Bentley said she learned what many people really thought of her.

“I was thrust in the role of first lady and when I went places, I knew that they didn’t care about me; they cared about the position of first lady,” Dianne Bentley said in an interview with The Tuscaloosa News. “However, I didn’t realize until I went through this how much I was loved.”

Living with pain

Talk with Dianne Bentley for any length of time and she will begin sharing her Christian faith. It is that faith that forms her philosophy on marriage, how God takes two people and binds them together through their vows to each other.

When that bond was broken between the Bentleys, Dianne was left with pain.

“When I was split in half and lost my one, I was an open wound,” she said. “I think that’s why I shut myself off for that year, because I didn’t want anyone opening that wound again.”

After her divorce, Dianne Bentley returned to Tuscaloosa and kept mum about her ex-husband and the circumstances that led to their divorce. Routinely turning down interviews with both local and national journalists, Dianne Bentley even closed herself off from those close to her for a time.

“If I had five people in a room, I would have five people giving me different advice, so I shut everybody out,” she said.

Dianne Bentley credits a small group of friends with keeping her from a life of isolation and slowly bringing her back to the public. At first, their gestures were as small as taking her out to lunch. Those gestures graduated to day trips and shopping. All the while, they never brought up Robert Bentley, Mason or the divorce.

“They wouldn’t call at night to say ‘How are you,’ but every night, they would find some excuse to call me to see if I was OK,” she said.

Before long, Dianne Bentley returned to her longtime church, First Baptist Tuscaloosa, joining a Bible study group and working in the nursery on Sunday mornings. This past spring, she went on a mission trip to Haiti, where she gave out dolls she had made for the children. In fact, different churches have asked Dianne Bentley to show them how to make those dolls, which First Baptist still sends to Haiti.

Dianne Bentley also has a full life as a grandmother to seven granddaughters and two grandsons.

In her new life, friendship was what opened Dianne Bentley up to the world again.

“I was always taking care of my husband and my boys, and I was never one of those women that did women’s trips or women’s things, but I learned the value of women’s friendships,” she said. “I literally would not have made it if I hadn’t had those girl friendships to walk alongside me and just help me through the pain.”

‘A blank future’

Dianne Bentley said that these days, she can rarely go anywhere without someone stopping her to say, “I’m praying for you.” Trips to the local Walmart often involve at least three different people stopping her to talk each time.

“I didn’t go to Kentuck (Festival of the Arts) because I knew I would get stopped by everybody,” she said.

October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month and during the last few weeks, Dianne Bentley has traveled around the state talking to people about the women behind the statistics in Alabama and how those who are being abused can get help. Of all the violent offenses reported across Alabama in 2016, 18 percent were domestic violence incidents, according to the Alabama Law Enforcement Agency’s Statistical Analysis Center.

“The problem is still growing, which is sad,” she said. “I wish we could stop it somehow.”

Though she was initially afraid of being first lady, Dianne Bentley said she eventually got to the point where she enjoyed serving the state and using her role to help others. Now, advocating for victims of domestic violence is what Bentley wants to continue to do.

“My mother lived to be 92, so I have a few more years left,” she said. “I’m healthy and if I can do something worthwhile, that’s what I want to do.”

Despite her new lease on life, Dianne Bentley still carries pain with her from her ex-husband’s betrayal.

“I don’t think the pain will ever get away because that was 50 years of my life, but it’s getting better,” she said.

For the time being, she will do what she did when she first became first lady: put her faith in God.

“All I ever wanted to be was a wife and mother,” she said. “Right now, I don’t know what my career is going to be, so I’m just going to have to trust the Lord that he is going to show me the path.”

Reach Drew Taylor at drew.taylor@tuscaloosanews.com or 205-722-0204.