Sarah was a client of mine who eventually became a good friend. Since about 2003, when I was her consultant, she has come to me for advice and information for many things. I attended her son's wedding. I helped her through tough times and she has been there for me when I needed a lift many times as well. She is a very bright, kind, giving, and caring lady. She puts up with my political diatribes because there are many things we agree on, and I have learned to reign in some of the more unpleasant opinions I have on the world because I know that she needs more light in her life right now than heat.

Over the past few years, we've both watched her dear friend of 20 years decay from a beatific soul into a creature of fear and malice. I can't begin to explain what kind of loss that is without describing Marie when I first met her.

During our many hours-long conversations, Sarah brought her friend up many times. They loved spiritual pursuits and Marie was, in some circles, considered an accomplished medium. Regardless of how you may feel about spiritualism, the fact was that Marie was a very open and sensitive person. Her 'channeling' was about discovering peace and sharing it with others. She sought enlightenment and ways to bring more kindness into the world. In that, Sarah and Marie were inseparable. They were even working on a book together with a compilation of some of the wonderful insights that Marie's channeling yielded to them.

I first met Marie on a trip to Toronto to go to a spiritual gathering. They were both a little chagrined that, during one of the presentations, I exposed a man offering lessons in 'using symbols to change physical properties' for the low price of $1500/week as a charlatan. They eventually forgave me, and I probably saved a few people some money, but it was a fun time for all three of us.

At the time, when I first met her and saw her smile, I thought that Marie was certainly a spirit in human form. There was a light around her, as people say, that indicated to me that she was very special. She was remarkable in that she also seemed to see into people. She seemed to know exactly what to say to someone to remove their doubts and fears. She had a gift for making people replace anxiety with joy just by smiling at them. It was really something. Without getting too much into how we communicate very subtle impressions to one-another about ourselves, I'll just say that it was obvious to me that she was a kind and enlightened spirit. That became ever more certain as I came to know her.

For a few years I saw Marie on and off, usually because Sarah needed a ride to go see her or because there was an event of some kind that we all wanted to attend. Whenever we talked, it tended to be about the suffering in the world, spiritualism, and sometimes, but rarely, politics. But then a few years ago, things started to change with Marie.

One of the things Sarah used to tell me about Marie, even early on, was Marie's son. There was no father in the picture, and Steven had become a teenager with terrible and childish attitudes toward others, the world, and his own mother. He was raised with everything being done for him. His father died when he was 16, but was abusive to his wife and son, and the effect was apparent. He could not hold down a job because he just couldn't be on time, or even cooperative enough to improve his own performance. By the age of 20 he was, essentially, and adult child. Steve blamed the world and his mother for all of his misfortunes. He lived with his mother, Marie. He didn't pay bills or rent. He could never, ever take responsibility for himself.

He would throw tantrums and yell at Marie. Sarah told me of the many times Marie called her in tears about something Steven said or did. I suspect that it might have been even worse than verbal abuse, but I can't know for sure.

I even met him personally a few times. I can say that he didn't seem like a 'bad' person. Of course he didn't know me, so that's no surprise. But I could see that he was always looking for somewhere to fit, somewhere his 'blame others' attitude seemed normal. On one occasion I was at Marie's, he told me that climate change was a 'hoax'. So I patiently explained some of the basic principles of it and assured him that we really did have an effect on the climate. When he asked me a question I told him I didn't know the answer to, it was enough for him to believe he was right, I was wrong, and that his sources must be trustworthy. I've since found the answer to that question, but that one exchange told me exactly what he was into.

Through subsequent conversations with Sarah, I found out many disturbing things about Steven. He liked to frequent white supremacist sites, he started listening to WBEN, our local Wingnut/Rush Limbaugh radio station, and he was getting deep into anti-government websites. Essentially, he found the mother load of 'blame everyone else' media that preys upon people's unwillingness to take responsibility.... and he was the embodiment of their target demographic.

This had been building for years, since about 2007. Shortly after Obama took office, Steven had become exactly the sort of mindless, fearful, hate-filled person that calls for violence to solve the nation's problems. He started talking about getting guns, about how 'the Liberals' were out to take our freedoms away, and even said a few things that I won't mention here because I did not hear them myself.

It was right around then that it started to happen.

Sarah called me one night and asked me how to respond to something Marie told her. She said that Marie told her that Obama was a secret Muslim who wanted to implement Sharia law on the US. She knew it was horse-pucky, but she just didn't have a good response and knew that I had a repertoire for dealing with wingnuttery. I told her a way to get Marie to think critically about the topic. I said, 'Ask her why Obama would go to a Christian Church if he were a truly devout Muslim fanatic. Then ask her for specific evidence, not opinions, that Obama intended any such thing.' But then I asked, "Where the hell is she getting this anyway?"

"From Steven. He blasts WBEN all day."

This surprised me. Marie and Steven rarely got along. He was always very abusive to his mother. He constantly berated her. Why would she listen to him when she knew that he was a creature of anger and fear? Why would she take him seriously enough to even entertain something so ludicrous?

I figured out why a couple of years later. After things had become much, much worse.

The calls came more and more often. Sarah would call asking me how to deal with this or that accusation or suspicion of Obama, Liberals, the government, the 'conspiracies'. She wasn't just looking for responses though. Sarah was afraid. Her friend was changing.

In our many long conversations, I've told Sarah about a number of very disturbing things our government and corporations are engaged in. In those, I've explained the rationale for my perspective and explained the empirical evidence I've based it on. When I get to an 'I don't know' point, I say exactly that, "I don't know". Over the years, even with my darkest projections for this nation, I've told her, "It's nothing to be afraid of, it's academic for me. I just hope we can adjust as necessary, and don't worry, I'll be here for you.". Sometimes those were the conversations I had to trail off of into happier talk, but the point was to inform, not to instill fear.

The case with Right-Wing radio is the same as it is with Fox 'News': The fear comes first, then the hypothalamus becomes the gateway like an open port on an unprotected computer... and the programming begins.

Things became worse. Sarah would call, composed but obviously upset, because Marie had berated her, called her 'stupid' or 'naïve', and Sarah couldn't take it. Their contact became more infrequent, because Marie would tell her something she heard from WBEN as though Gospel Truth and then fly off the handle when Sarah questioned the premise. The anger and the fear Marie brought into their relationship was overwhelming. Marie no longer smiled the way she used to. Where she once lifted others up, gave the benefit of the doubt, and spread joy and light, she now put her friend down, berated her, and brought her to tears.

The kind, bright, and beautiful Marie. No more.

Through the administration and constant barrage of right-wing talk radio, and the hole in her life that was the gulf between herself and her son, she fell like an angel. Her one weakness, that need to connect with him, exploited by the voices of fear and hatred turned her, in a matter of years, from a kind, gentle spirit, into a gun-toting, angry, resentful creature that can no longer be reasoned with.

She's just gone. That smile, that light... just... gone.

Sarah called me as I was writing this, in fact. I started to read it to her and even though her real name isn't 'Sarah', she knew what it was about. Halfway through, she started to break down, so I stopped.

I wish no one had to go through that. I can't imagine having a complete stranger in the body and with the face of your best friend as Marie was to her.

I lost a friend in Marie too, but for Sarah, she watched her friend die slowly over years.

From the poison of right-wing radio.