But let's say I'm wrong. We'll pretend playing hard to get is like the most super way to get a guy ever. We'll pretend you did your trick and instead of finding you tedious and bland, your dude asked you out. (And you eventually accepted.) Just do me a favor and fast forward a little bit. Two weeks from now, what do you want your boyfriend to tell his friends about the relationship? "Oh, the way she just sat there and did nothing was amazing. I just had to have her. There she was, not talking to me too much and not making too much eye contact, and I was all, man, I would love to have a girlfriend that might not actually dig me."

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Wouldn't you rather overhear him say, "I met this girl the other night and she was so funny I laughed the whole night." Or "This new girl, she gets things that no other woman gets. I can talk to her." Or lastly, wouldn't even praise for your sexual performance be more gratifying than how awesome you are at hiding your feelings and true desires?

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"And you know what she said? Nothing! Isn't that great?"

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But there's a bigger problem. Which guys are most susceptible to the "playing hard to get" trick? Only the kind of dude who wants what he can't have. Exactly. If your trick gets you a prize, then congratulations, you just won a dick. Your new man doesn't actually want you. How could he? You didn't even show him you. You were too busy being cool. He just wanted a toy he didn't own yet. And guess what? Once he has you, you lose your only distinguishing characteristic. But I'm sure he won't resent you for it. After all, you just went fishing with super-smart bait -- the kind that only attracts assholes and disappears completely the moment they bite. Well played.