(Newser) – If you found yourself struggling to understand President Obama’s 10th-grade-level oil spill speech, Stephen Colbert is here to help you out. “Mr. President, your flowery verbiage is opaque and perplexing,” he said last night on the Report. “I’m sorry, I meant to say, your talky words make ears mad.” He then turned the speech into a children’s book, which of course required a character named “Spot” (the oil spill)…and another named Dick (Tony Hayward, of course).

