Nation's Gen Xers Announce Plan To Just Sit Back And Enjoy Watching Boomers, Millennials Tear Each Other To Shreds

U.S.—The nation's population of Gen Xers announced Thursday they would be continuing their policy of just sitting back and enjoying watching boomers and millennials blame each other for everything.

"We're just gonna slowly back away and stay out of the crossfire," said Mike Ganders, 49. "The boomers are blaming the millennials for everything, the millennials pin all their problems on the boomers---and frankly, I'm OK with this arrangement."

Boomers often accuse millennials of ruining the nation by being lazy, not buying houses, and eating avocado toast. Millennials, in turn, point out that boomers put the nation on a trajectory of growing debt and borrowing from future generations to fund their own lifestyles and also still haven't figured out how to use Facebook. In the meantime, savvy members of Generation X suddenly realized that they were completely off the hook for their own faults, and so decided to simply watch from a safe distance as the generations that bookend them blast each other constantly.

"We kinda have it made," Ganders added. "We get all the benefits of the boomers' unsustainable social programs and get to be a little bit lazy like the millennials, and yet they skip right over us and blame the other guy."

Gen Xers did state they have one regret they will take full responsibility for: allowing grunge music to spread unimpeded.

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