1. As a rejection of the end-of-the-year-list obsession in the media in Newcity’s early days, we decided to do Top 5s, instead of the usual Top 10s, and keep the lists minimal in exposition.

2. Critics would be forced to make hard choices rather than the waffling namby-pamby approach so irritating in other media (honorable mentions, etc. etc.).

3. Our critics figured out how to get around the brevity issue by creating multiple permutations of lists for their fields.

4. Somewhere along the line we added the miscellaneous lists because they’re funny and, well, we like randomness.

5. And so, eventually, our minimalist intentions became the celebration of excess you see today, nearly a hundred lists to keep your mind sharp during the brain-deadening onslaught of the holidays. See you in 2014.

—Brian Hieggelke

Top 5 Not-So-Pedestrian Local Walking Stories

Chicago Riverwalk wins federal financing, Walsh snags construction contract

Driver, three times over legal blood alcohol limit, kills Ja’Mya Love, two, in Englewood

City installs speed cameras at school and park safety zones, drivers whine

The city’s first pedestrian scramble intersection debuts at Jackson and State

Loyola plans Kenmore ped plaza, DePaul proposes Kenmore “shared street”

—John Greenfield

Top 5 Wheelie Exciting Chicago Bicycling Stories

City successfully rolls out Divvy bike-share, announces expansion to 475 stations

CDOT builds groundbreaking protected lanes on Milwaukee Avenue

Fifteen on-street bike parking corrals open across the city, bringing the total to nineteen

Go Bronzeville program encourages residents to add cycling to their commuting toolbox

Death of cyclist Bobby Cann leads IDOT to lift ban of protected lanes on state roads

—John Greenfield

Top 5 Rapidly Developing Transit Stories

Bus rapid transit advocates and opponents lock horns over Ashland BRT plan

After five-month shutdown, South Red Line rehab garners rave reviews

Metra and Pace reps vote against own interests, support Illiana Tollway boondoggle

Glitches plague Ventra launch, CTA vows to fix the problems

Rahm trumpets $492 million O’Hare Line overhaul

—John Greenfield

Top 5 Public Space Stories of 2013

The Gateway seating area opens in the State Street median

Groovy, amorphous People Spot debuts at Southport and Addison

City issues request for proposals to activate fifty underused plazas

Work starts on the long-awaited Bloomingdale Trail, aka the 606

Construction begins on a new People Plaza near Milwaukee and Diversey

—John Greenfield

Top 5 Neighborhoods That Should Not Be Called “Logan Square”

Humboldt Park

Avondale

Bucktown

Hermosa

Cragin

—Emerson Dameron

Top 5 Things to Never Instagram

The skyline

The snow

The Bean

Hotdogs

Deep-dish pizza

—Emerson Dameron

Top 5 Google Autocomplete Suggestions for “Why is Chicago so…”

Violent

Windy

Corrupt

Cold

Awesome

—Emerson Dameron

Top 5 People Responsible for Chicago’s Bad Weather

Rahm Emanuel

Barack Obama

Suburbanites

The Bears

Ventra

—Emerson Dameron

Top five things you will not hear on WBEZ

A complete phone interview without awkward silence or a lost connection on “The Morning Shift”

Emotion in Jerome McDonnell’s voice

Unforced laughter

Any music from Chicago-based jazz musicians

A black person without a criminal record or some type of dysfunction on “This American Life”

—Corey Hall

Top 5 People Kanye West Compared Himself To, Aside From God

Steve Jobs

Michael Jordan

Kate Moss

Picasso

Michelangelo

—Naomi Huffman

Top 5 Longest Lines

Hot Doug’s

Kuma’s Corner

Bathrooms at Lollapalooza

Best Buy locations on Black Friday

DMV License Renewal at Thompson Center

—John Wawrzaszek

Top 5 South Side Bars To Check Out

Bernice’s in Bridgeport

Simone’s in Pilsen

Woodlawn Tap in Hyde Park

Cork and Kerry in Beverly

Stash Leahy’s in Blue Island

—John Wawrzaszek

Top 5 Holiday Attractions

ZooLights at Lincoln Park Zoo

Christkindlmarket in Daley Plaza

Christmas Around the World at Museum of Science and Industry

Winter WonderFest at Navy Pier

Wreathed Lions at Art Institute of Chicago

—John Wawrzaszek

Top 5 Chicago 5K Races of 2013

Chi-Town Big Game 5K (February 3)

Ridge Run Challenge (May 27)

Chinatown 5K (July 13)

Terrapin 5K & Music Festival (August 8)

Carrera de los Muertos (November 2)

—Zach Freeman

Top 5 Chicago Half Marathons of 2013

F^3 Lake Half (January 26)

Chicago 13.1 Marathon (June 8)

Chicago Women’s Half Marathon (June 23)

Rock ‘n’ Roll Chicago Half (July 21)

Chicago Half Marathon (September 8)

—Zach Freeman

Top 5 Derrick Rose Career Change Options

Coach

Sportscaster

Pitchman

Personal injury attorney

The Jacksonville Jaguars

—Emerson Dameron

Top 5 Chicago sports transactions that did NOT get done in 2013 but should happen in 2014

Franchise: Jay Cutler

Amnesty: Carlos Boozer

Rehab: Derrick Rose

Remodel: Wrigley Field

Release: Adam Dunn

—David Witter

Top 5 Things To Take The Edge Off For Northwestern Football Fans

Hey, Illinois sucks too.

That diploma

Cajun tater tots from Rocking Horse

Malort

Women’s lacrosse season is just around the corner

—B. David Zarley

Top 5 Chicago-based Boxers

Reigning IBF Light Middleweight World Champion “King” Carlos Molina

IBF No. 1 Ranked Light-Heavyweight Contender Andrew “The Polish Prince” Fonfara

Middleweight World Title Challenger Osumanu “Oz” Adama (to face WBA Champ Golovkin February 1)

Super Middleweight Contender Don “Da Bomb” George

Emerging Light-Welterweight Contender Adrian “El Tigre” Granados

—Bill Hillmann

Top 5 reasons Paul Konerko re-signed with the White Sox

Wants to be present when the White Sox take it to the next level by losing their 100th game

Wants to give Adam Dunn competition as the slowest guy on the team

Wants to better his aim at throwing foul balls into the empty seats at U.S. Cellular Field

Wants to get a dugout view of another Sox fan attacking an opposing team’s first-base coach

Wants to keep wearing the alternative black home jerseys that hide his growing man-boobs

—Corey Hall

Top 5 things Richard Renteria is preparing to do as new manager of the Cubs

Take a shot of tequila every time cardboard-cutout radio announcer Patrick Hughes calls any Latino player named Luis, “Louie”

Prepare to use 2013 BP cup to lean on whenever his hip acts up

Prepare for Old Style beer-spray celebration when the Cubs win their 70th game of the season

Start preparing his exit speech for 2015

Get a privatized driver—courtesy of Mayor Emanuel—after taking a wrong turn and winding up in Boys Town after the bullpen blows another game

—Corey Hall

Top five excuses White Sox fans will continue to give for not attending home games

Prefer listening to Hawk Harrelson’s age-(very)old “Hawkisms” in the privacy of own home

Exploding scoreboard distracts them from watching the score of a Cubs game, a team they claim to hate and ignore

Prefer listening to Ed Farmer’s no-fun-allowed play-by-play call as a cure for insomnia in own home

Three train lines, an expressway, a bus line, and multiple parking lots within blocks of the Cell Block on 35th Street still make getting to games difficult

Still upset that Jermaine Dye won 2005 World Series MVP over Joe Crede, suspect a “reverse racism” conspiracy

—Corey Hall

Top 5 Disappointments in Chicago Sports

Derrick Rose, again

Jay Cutler

Robin Ventura

Carlos Marmol

No more Old Style at Wrigley Field

—John Wawrzaszek

Newcity’s Top 5 of Everything 2013: Art

Newcity’s Top 5 of Everything 2013: Design

Newcity’s Top 5 of Everything 2013: Dining

Newcity’s Top 5 of Everything 2013: Drinking

Newcity’s Top 5 of Everything 2013: Film

Newcity’s Top 5 of Everything 2013: Lit

Newcity’s Top 5 of Everything 2013: Music

Newcity’s Top 5 of Everything 2013: Stage