A sound ass dwells within a sound mind n' a sound body.

Yo, wuz crackalackin', biatch? Yo ass is smokin Dirtnap Weapon Meista Academy.

Mo' commonly known as tha DWMA. Well shiiiit, it standz as a thugged-out defense against tha forcez of evil which would plunge tha ghetto tha fuck tha fuck into chaos n' drag humanitizzle ta tha straight-up depth of fear n' madness.

Da demons known as Kishin n' they insatiable hunger fo' destruction.

To insure tha Kishin never regain they hold on dis ghetto dis academy was dropped by tha grim reaper, Dirtnap his fuckin lil' dirty ass.

So basically, we a organization dat exists ta protect n' preserve peace.

I guess it aint exactly a typical school.

Oh well, dat aint blingin.

For now, letz roll up our sleeves n' git ta work.

Want mo' power... mo' power... power...

That dude, Soul Eater n' shiznit yo yo. His ass.

Yeah, Maka. Therez no diggitizzle bout dat shit. That dudez ass be a Kishin egg.

It aint nuthin but pure evil. Dat punk not human no mo'.

Any ass dat breaks from tha path of humanitizzle n' becomes evil runs tha risk of transformin tha fuck tha fuck into a Kishin.

In tha name of Lord dirtnap dis evil must be purged.

Letz collect tha damaged ass n' end all dis bullshit.

Just so we clear, Maka, dis muthafucka is turnin his fuckin lil' dirty ass tha fuck tha fuck into a weapon.

Dat punk tha same as me dat way.

'course I look a shitload coola up in mah human form than da ruffneck do.

But bein a weapon aint what tha fuck tha fuck tha problem is here.

Da problem wit dis muthafucka is his cold-ass thugged-out ass.

I know.

You, serial killer, Jack tha Ripper, yo' murderin minutes is done.

Yo crazy-ass ass is mine!

Weapon meister, two fightin as one. Letz go, Soul Eater.

It aint nuthin but ours now, nahmeean, biatch? Da 99th soul!

Maka, fuck you fo' a phat meal.

We almost there, aren't we, biatch? Took our asses long enough but dat was number 99 so we finally collected all tha Kishinz souls we need.

Only one thang left now, nahmeean, biatch? I've just gotta smoke tha ass of a witch. Then I be bout ta be one of Lord Dirtnapz weapons.

Yo ass is lookin all up in tha next Dirtnap Scythe.

I know fo' realz fo' realz. As if I wasn't def enough already, right?

Anyway, we'd mo' betta report back ta Lord Dirtnap n' let his thugged-out ass know.

Just write up in tha dirtnap roomz number n' shit. 42-42-564, whenever you wanna knock on Dirtnapz door.

Yo muthafucka, Lord Dirtnap. Is you there, biatch? Meista Maka reporting.

Yeah, yeah. Yo muthafucka, meista Maka yo yo. How tha fuck tha fuck is you bustin, biatch? How tha fuck tha fuck done done did it go?

I've just collected tha 99th Kishin soul, sir. Now our laid-back asses just have one witch ass left ta collect n' we'll be done.

Well done, Maka. Yo ass is provin ta be just as pimpin a meista as yo' mutha was.

Yo, Soul Eater n' shit. If you even be thinkin of touchin mah Maka, if you lay a hand on her, as a Dirtnap Scythe; no, as her father, I'ma freakin bust a cold-ass lil cap up in you, you gots me, you lil octopus head?

What tha fuck iz you tokin, biatch? See how tha fuck tha fuck def I am, biatch? Yo ass be thinkin I be gonna settle fo' a gangbangin' flat-chested hoe like her?

WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY!, biatch? ARE YOU TRYING TO TELL ME THAT MY MAKA IS NOT ATTRACTIVE!, biatch? WHY HAVEN'T YOU MADE A MOVE ON HER, biatch? YOU ARE A MAN, AREN'T YOU?!

Yo ass know, you a lil buggin.

Maka, yo' daddy loves yo thugged-out ass.

Don't waste yo' breath on mah dirty ass. Therez no way I be bout ta eva consider you mah father.

Enough of dis shit. Letz set tha crew feud aside fo' a moment.

As you know, if a meista n' weapon pair collect 99 evil souls, souls dat have strayed n' become Kishin Eggs n' additionally collect a ass of one witch then tha weapon will obtain tha qualifications necessary ta become a thugged-out dirtnap scythe, one of mah instruments.

But itz dat last soul, thatz a lil' bit tricky.

You've juiced it up dis far but you should know there be countless meistas whoz ass have lost they lives when they challenged a witch. Yo ass need ta be straight-up careful, Maka. But if you dirty maybe tha Dirtnap Scythe you create is ghon be as bangin as tha one yo' momma pimped before yo thugged-out ass.

Right.

Also, please ta be shizzle not ta make any mistakes. This last collection, tha witchz ass is straight-up blingin. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. If you slip up all of tha 99 Kishin souls dat two of y'all have collected so far is ghon be confiscated.

We understand, sir.

Yeah. We bout ta cook up a cold-ass lil cold-ass lil clean thang of dat shit. No worries.

In dat case I be bout ta peep you two later.

Maka...

Yo ass be a lil' bit buggin.

Maka!

If you don't shut tha fuck up I be goin ta use mah reaper chop ta split yo' head open.

It aint nuthin but mo' effectizzle if you warn before you chop.

Pum-pum-pumpum. I always git what tha fuck tha fuck I want. Just give it ta mah dirty ass.

Pum-pum-pumpum. I be a gangbangin' funky-ass beauti-beauti-ful pretty lady.

Come give mah back a scrub.

But, you know, you know. Ya Momma shoulda holla'd at ya, I gots a secret. Yes yes y'all, yeaaaa y'all, I do. Pumpkins.

Pum-pum-pumpkins. Pum-pum-pumpkins. 'cause thatz mah magic spell.

Pum-pum-pumpkins. Pum-pum-pumpkins. Yeah.

This must be tha doggy den where tha witch Blair lives.

A pumpkin house, biatch? Thatz cool.

It looks dirty. But sneakin tha fuck tha fuck into a thugged-out doggy den aint straight-up manly.

Why don't our laid-back asses just charge right up in there?

We can't. Dat hoe different from tha others we've faced so far.

Letz go.

Yo dawwwwg! Come back here!

Naked lady!

Yo, whatz tha matter, biatch? Is every last muthafuckin last muthafuckin thang aiiight down there up in tha bubbles, lil boy?

It aint nuthin but all gravy. Def muthafuckas peep naked dem hoes all tha time. I be straight-up used ta dat shit.

Of course yo ass is, dear. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. I be shizzle thatz why yo' nozzle is bleeding.

Yeah. Never mind. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Yo crazy-ass ass is mine.

Yo ass idiot son! What was you thinking?

Sorry ta interrupt. But I be bout ta be takin yo' ass now, nahmeean?

I hope dat thugged-out pimp would be all right.

Could you transform tha fuck tha fuck into a scythe?

Workin on it, Maka.

Okay. Thatz it, witch lady. Naked or not I be still gonna smoke yo' ass now, nahmeean?

Witch lady, biatch? Oh, wow yo. Dude straight-up became a scythe.

After I take yo' ass he'll be much mo' n' mo' n' mo'. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Soul is ghon be a Dirtnap Scythe.

And I be bout ta have pimped a weapon stronger than mah dad.

I wanna bust a nut on dat shit. Why don't you be a phat lil hoe n' give it ta me son?

Fuck dat shit, Dirtnap Scythe. Yo ass be a real frisky one, aren't yo slick ass?

Oh, n' I heard dat you gotz a lil daughter like a muthafucka. Isn't dat right?

What sort of hoe is she?

Yo ass don't wanna ask dis shit. Trust me on dis one.

'kay. But, why?

Just up in case you aint figured it up yet, Dirtnap Scythe be a lil' bit of a playa n' dat didn't go over straight-up well wit his hoe.

They're up in tha process of gettin a gangbangin' finger-lickin' divorce n' aint a thugged-out damn thang dat yo' ass can do.

Da most shitty thang is his wild lil' fuckin lil' daughter Maka is on her motherz side. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch hates his crazy-ass muthafuckin ass.

That soundz fucked up.

MAKA! PLEASE DON'T HATE ME, MAKA! I LOVE YOU AND YOUR MAMA, I PROMISE, MAKA! IT'S TRUE, IT'S TRUE, I LOVE YOU, I LOVE YOU!

Nuff props straight-up much, sir.

Bye, Mista Muthafuckin Dirtnap Scythe. Please come again.

Yeah... Bye.

Damn dat witch yo yo. How tha fuck tha fuck is I supposed ta be def when she all bangin' n' naked like that, huh?

Yo ass expected a stiff attack. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch be a witch but you lost yo' chizzle ta become a thugged-out dirtnap scythe cuz you couldn't resist her muthafuckin ass.

Yo ass is just jealouz of her titties.

It aint nuthin but her n' shit. What now, nahmeean?..

I be thinking...

Oh! My fuckin fuckin lil scythy boy!

Listen up, Soul. This time I freestyled down a thugged-out detailed plan on dis piece of paper.

And dat supposed ta give our asses a edge dis time, biatch? We aren't exactly goin grocery hustlin here, so peek-a-boo, clear tha way, I be comin' thru fo'sho fo' realz fo' realz. A piece of paper aint gonna help our asses beat a witch.

Fine biaaatch! Then you tell me what tha fuck tha fuck we need ta do ta beat Blair!

Dum diddy-dum, here I come biaaatch! Dum diddy-dum, here I come biaaatch! Who tha fuck tha fuck knows, biatch? I vote fo' brute force though.

Thatz yo' a answer fo' every last muthafuckin last muthafuckin thang! Yo ass gotta work together here biaaatch! Don't you wanna become a Dirtnap Scythe!?

Yeah, git it, Maka. Yo ass can shut tha fuck up now, nahmeean?

Yo ass gotta take dis seriously, Soul. Well shiiiit, it aint nuthin but tha witch we goin up against. Letz just follow my...

Pumpkin, biatch? Pum-pumpkin, biatch? Halloween cannon!

Yo ass should give it up. Yo ass can't beat me, girl.

What tha fuck iz you bustin, you idiot!

Shut up. Or was you just gonna try whoopin her by gettin a nosebleed again?

Men is straight-up useless sometimes.

Yo ass only ran tha fuck tha fuck into Blairz doggy den up in tha straight-up original gangsta gangsta place cuz you knew dat biiiiatch was takin a gangbangin' funky-ass bath.

Now you just makin false accusations fo' realz fo' realz. And will you tell me how tha fuck tha fuck hoes always come up wit these wild assumptions up in tha straight-up original gangsta gangsta place?

Womenz intuition.

I don't KNOW you sometimes.

Yo, there, lil scythe boy. Is dat dumb hoe of yours givin you a hard time, biatch? Why don't you forget bout her n' come be mine?

I would never eva yell at you like her ass is no matter what tha fuck tha fuck you did ta mah dirty ass.

Hold on, witch. I be Soulz partner, not you, aiiight, biatch? Our rap battlez don't concern yo thugged-out ass.

Is dat so, biatch? Well, we'll peep bout that, girlie.

What the...?

Pum-pumpkin pumpkin smackin pumpkin!

What should we try now, Soul, biatch? My fuckin fuckin attacks won't work on her muthafuckin ass.

Soul, biatch? Soul, hello, biatch? Whatz wrong?

Why don't you forget bout her n' come be mine?

Dope times at Chupa Cabra's.

Yo ass is up drankin when daughter is up in shit, biatch? What kind of daddy is yo slick ass?

What, biatch? Maka, biatch? Somethang happened?

Bitch aint bustin so well against dis witch. Well shiiiit, it be lookin like she might take a thugged-out dirt nap.

What, biatch? Maka, hold on.

Quit right there, so peek-a-boo, clear tha way, I be comin' thru fo'sho. Think bout what tha fuck tha fuck you bustin. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. Yo ass or I could win against a opponent like dat wit one blow fo' realz fo' realz. A single reaper chop be all what tha fuck tha fuck it'd take ta crush her skull. We both know that, dirtnap scythe. But our game aren't bein tested n' aint a thugged-out damn thang dat yo' ass can do. Yo ass is her daddy n' shit. Yo ass must KNOW tha thang.

Maka...

Still, there be a suttin' a lil weird bout dat witch.

Soul, what tha fuck tha fuck be happenin, biatch? I don't KNOW why you aint been answerin mah dirty ass.

Maka.

There yo ass is.

Quit rappin'.

Yo, what tha fuck tha fuck did you drop me like dat for?

I don't be thinkin we should be partners no mo', Maka. Yo ass see, I only wanna be Witch Blairz weapon now, nahmeean?

Oh, do you straight-up want me son?

Yeah, thatz mo' like dat shit. Leave mah daughter alone, you lil scumbag.

Is now straight-up tha time ta be sayin that?

Blair playa! Yo ass used yo' magic ta make Soul wanna be up in yo' faaaaaace biaaatch! Thatz a gangbangin' finger-lickin' dirty trick.

Yo ass straight-up is fuckin wack fo' realz fo' realz. Any playa would chizzle a hoe wit a gangbangin' funky-ass body like Blairz over you n' yo' flat chest. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch didn't gotta trick me ta make me pick her instead of yo thugged-out ass.

Now dat you mentioned it dat witch do gotz a straight-up sick body, don't she?

It would be dopest dat you just shut tha fuck up fo' a while.

Yo ass men.. fo' realz fo' realz. All of you, you horrible. Cheatin on every last muthafuckin last muthafuckin biatch. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. But yo thugged-out ass... you I straight-up decided ta trust... I put mah faith up in yo thugged-out ass... I can't believe all dis bullshit... I wish dat all of y'all would just take a thugged-out dirtnap biaaatch! Yo, Soul. Yo ass holla'd dat all dem hoes make wild assumptions without reasonin first, right, biatch? Thatz what tha fuck tha fuck you holla'd, biatch? For what tha fuck tha fuck reason do pimps have fo' cheating, biatch? It aint nuthin but not fair!

How tha fuck tha fuck be supposed ta know, biatch? I can't answer dis shiznit fo' realz fo' realz. After all, def pimps don't cheat on they partners, do they, biatch? Maka!

We've gots dem all. Dope thang.

Yes, Soul. Nuff props fo' dis shit.

In tha end, tha shape n' form don't matter at all. Well shiiiit, it aint nuthin but only tha ass dat matters, right, biatch? Nothang else.

Once you smoke dis shit...

Thatz right. With dis ass I be bout ta become a Dirtnap Scythe.

THE POWER, I CAN FEEL INCREDIBLE POWER! Or not.

Huh, biatch? No way.

Don't tell mah dirty ass... you not straight-up...

I never holla'd dat I was a witch, did I, biatch? Yo ass just made dat assumption all on yo' own. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. I be straight-up just a cold-ass lil cold-ass lil pussaaaaay wit a wack amount of magical juice n' shit. Da shape n' form don't matter n' shit. Isn't dat right, biatch? Huh, Soul?

Yes, just as I suspected.

But cat'll do. Yes, Blair. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. I be bout ta be yo' pussaaaaay toy any day...

You've gotta be kiddin me biaaatch! Do dis mean I ate 99 human souls n' one pussaaaaay soul, biatch? That just cannot be right!

And thatz not all...

Da witchz ass is straight-up blingin. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. If you slip up all of tha 99 Kishin souls dat two of y'all have collected so far is ghon be confiscated. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! This type'a shiznit happens all tha time. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! This type'a shiznit happens all tha time fo' realz fo' realz. All of dem is ghon be confiscated. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! This type'a shiznit happens all tha time. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! This type'a shiznit happens all tha time fo' realz fo' realz. All, confiscated.

So dat means... we failed.

Damn it, damn it, damn dat shiznit son!

We gotta start all over n' shiznit fo' realz fo' realz. As tha meista I be bout ta take responsibility, aiiight?

Oh dude, n' I was dis close ta bein tha coolest muthafucka up in tha academy!

Dude just ate yo' soul, you damn cat. What tha fuck iz you still bustin up there?

Yo ass aren't straight-up smart, is you, lil girlie. Don't you know dat all pussies have nine souls, biatch? So Soul, when is you gonna leave dis dumb hoe fo' me, anyway?

Blair, go away dawwwwg! Quit followin us, will yo slick ass?

Come on, Soul. Yo ass know you want to.