CHATHAM-KENT, ONT.—A police force in southwestern Ontario has released a list of the silliest 911 it received in 2016, including one where a resident called the emergency line asking for the phone number to the local KFC.

The Chatham-Kent police service says it tries to educate citizens about the importance of calling police when they see crimes or suspicious activities, but on occasion, they say police get calls that don’t quite fit into those categories.

In one call a woman dialed 911 saying all her cable TV programs were in French but she was not French. In another, police had to go to a residence to settle a heated dispute between two neighbours over the ownership of a jar of peanut butter.

The force says they’ve also had a call asking who delivers a local paper in specific neighbourhoods, and a social media inquiry about whether police could help with the temperature in a resident’s apartment.

Police also had a call from a woman asking if it was legal to trap squirrels in her back yard and take them to a farm’s field.

There was also an instance where friends became concerned when a woman in Chatham posted “he’s trying to kill me” on her Facebook page and called police after being unable to reach her. The woman ended up explaining to officers that she had posted the message online after her husband had passed gas.

Chatham-Kent police have also released some of the best speeding excuses they received in 2016, including someone saying they were trying to dry off a just-washed truck and a person saying they were practising lines for a play and must have been pushing on the gas.