1. God help us.

3. From a politically astute second-grader.

4. Nice try but no cigar.

5. Now hiring: police officers. Minimum educational qualifications: none.

6. In love with all things domestic.

7. Sorry, we can't not point out how retarded you sound.

8. And we all so clearly see who flunked remedial grammar.

9. Someone paid for this?

10. Boat and mast sold separately.

11. You!! are!! a!! moron!!

12. Harry Potter's country hideaway.

13. Yum.

14. At least there are no spelling mistakes.

