Trump Denies Ever Knowing Anyone Named 'Jeff Sessions'

WASHINGTON, D.C.—At a White House press conference Friday, President Trump denied ever knowing anyone named "Jeff Sessions," despite having worked with Sessions in the White House for the past two years.

A reporter asked a question about Jeff Sessions tendering his resignation, and Trump quickly shot back, "I don't know who Jeff Sessions is. I've never heard of anyone by that name."

"He was on your staff for like, almost two years. He was the Attorney General. You literally just asked him to resign the other day," the bewildered reporter replied.

"Oh, he was? Ok. Well I don't know him. Sessions? Never heard of the guy," Trump replied.

At publishing time, witnesses had confirmed the reporter was then escorted out of the room for "judo-chopping" a White House intern, though video clearly showed he had simply shaken her hand.

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