fedorable haiku short story

he runs out of “Dew”

trip to 7/11

time to “Do the Dew”

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finds the Mountain Dew

the euphoria sets in

“Nice Guy” is happy

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leaving the store he

sees cute girl, *tips fedora*

his mind runs rampant

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cute girl approaches

Nice Guy, with vast chivalry,

opens door for her

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“M'lady,” he groans,

“Such a pretty specimen.”

“Ugh. Creep.” she retorts

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defeated neckbeard

walks away a shambled mess

“Damn. Friendzoned again.”

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