This is the first episode in our nightly quarantine series, which will be available for the duration of the pandemic on Patreon! Subscribe at http://www.patreon.com/notreally for a day-by-day breakdown of what has to be the most melodramatic extinction-level mass behavioral shift since Paul was kicked off Twitter and forced to shitpost as @gaycrossfit.

We discuss our quars, individual symptoms, attention-starved celebrities, becoming gamers, "the death of cinema", Alex HRH Collection, the fulfilled prophecies of Wall-E, Idiocracy, and Glamorama, Paul's brother's girlfriend's intimacy issues, Coronavirus grifters, lying hookers, getting deplatformed, our entertainment suggestions, Danielle Staub's face, designer dogs named after designer bags, and Amanda Bynes's pregnancy.

Buy the first and very-limited-edition Not Really T-shirt at https://not-really-store.myshopify.com/collections/frontpage/products/paul-s-birthday-shirt !!!