A reactionary approach can inflict similar chaos at work. This can create discord with co-workers, your boss, your team, your suppliers, and even your customers. When you master how to deal with people in all types of business situations, you will likely drive greater results, save yourself from a great deal of stress and aggravation, and hopefully accelerate your growth in the organization. The key is to stay calm and avoid being reactive. Instead, take a proactive approach to deal with the situation. Let’s look at just a couple of scenarios.

Scenario 1

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A reliable member of your team makes a costly mistake and you are upset and frustrated with this team member’s error. You immediately react by calling out this employee with a nasty and frustrated tone. This response is unhealthy, unproductive, could trigger a series of reactive exchanges and most importantly, damages the relationship with that employee. You should definitely be holding your employee accountable, but in a proactive way. You should meet with the employee privately, acknowledging the error, however instead of launching a verbal attack (a reactionary move) that accomplishes absolutely nothing and actually does damage, you should proactively ask questions about what happened, seeking to understand how the employee made the mistake and coaching him/her on how to avoid this type of error in the future. We all make mistakes and as a boss, it is your responsibility to coach your people and help them improve and up their game. Take a proactive approach to filling knowledge gaps or even addressing an avoidable mistake.

Scenario 2

Your customer becomes irate when a delivery is late, using expletives and threatening to take his/her business elsewhere. This is a very good customer, but also a difficult one. Never react to a customer (unless you don’t want their business). Acknowledge your company’s error and offer to make it up in some way. Assure the customer how important they are to you and affirm your commitment to take good care of them and avoid these mistakes in the future. Then evaluate what happened with your team without assigning blame. Identify what went wrong and take measures to try an avoid disappointing customers in this way in the future.

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The point here is that barring an intentional and egregious action by another stakeholder, the best way to handle situations is in a proactive and diplomatic manner, while still making your point and seeking to learn from mistakes.

Here is a quick lesson on how to practice this change from reactive to proactive. In the future when a situation arises that upsets you, let this now be a trigger to avoid a knee-jerk reaction. Instead, adopt the STP Method – Stop, Think, Proact. Stop yourself from an impulsive reactive response. Think about the best way to address this situation with a focus on positive results. Be proactive, taking these positive steps to resolve a problem or situation. In many ways this approach can turn a mistake or negative occurrence into an opportunity for a positive outcome.

By the way, this works with personal relationships too. We are all human and learning to control our behavior, and manage our anger and frustration will only position us for greater success personally and professionally. Add the STP Method to your toolbox and you will see much better results.