No more guacamole for you. Or salsa. Or tacos.

It’s a sad life.

Or at least it is at Gonzaga University, where not-Mexican students are being told not to even think about wearing a sombrero, saying “hola” or otherwise giving the slightest nod and wink to Mexican culture on Cinco de Mayo.

According to Campus Reform, Gonzaga’s VP of Student Development Judi Biggs Garbuio sent an email to the entire university student body explaining the dangers of “cultural appropriation” on this otherwise minor Mexican holiday that frankly most Latinos don’t really care about:

“Unfortunately, the celebrations have become less about the appreciation of Mexican heritage, and instead has become more about drinking and partying especially by non-Mexican individuals,” she continued. “Because of this, there are many instances when Cinco de Mayo becomes a holiday that is full of cultural appropriation. “At some college campuses, including our own,” she warned, “students create ‘theme’ parties or dress in costumes that are insensitive and offensive to the Mexican-American and more broadly the Latinx culture.”

She included a link to the university’s Unity Multicultural Education Center (UMEC) Facebook page, which displays a handy dandy graphic explaining to all non-Latino students how to properly celebrate the holiday without tripping all over their culturally insensitive ponchos. Which they’re not allowed to wear.





The graphic explicitly tells students not to “dare put on that sombrero,” forego the fake mustaches and serapes, and to avoid Chipotle because it “doesn’t count” as real Mexican food.

Students are also encouraged to “hold your friends accountable when they do any (or all) of these things.”

Because getting all up in your bro’s face and being like, “Hey, dude, put down those maracas and stop offending everyone with your terrible Scarface impression” sounds like a great idea on a holiday known for everyone doing copious amounts of tequila shots.

Interestingly, Gonzaga issued no such warning back in April on St. Patrick’s Day, where countless non-Irish (and noticeably non-white) people dress up as leprechauns as an excuse to start downing beer and whisky starting at 9 a.m.

Then again, that’s a holiday celebrating an Anglo culture, so maybe that doesn’t count.