Let's imagine that you are an Olympic athlete (unless you already are, in which case, congratulations). You have trained for years and qualified to go to the London Summer Games. You go to the Games. You compete. You lose. You are now full of a swirling mix of disappointment because you missed out on a medal and excitement because no longer do you have to adhere to your rigorous training program. Or, more optimistically, let's say that you won. You got the gold! You are filled with a sense of triumph and, like with the other scenario, the feeling of being off the clock for the first time in god knows how long. What do you do with yourself? Turns out, you have sex with all of the other athletes that are feeling the same way.


Looks like the Olympic Village — a collection of 2,818 apartments, a drinking hall and, sexiest of all, a 24-hour McDonald's — is serving as a no-rules fuck pad for the thousands of very fit and virile Olympic athletes who hang around after their events are over. According to Mark Russell, a gold-medal–winning Australian target shooter, the Village is "the most testosterone-fuelled place on earth. People are releasing their frustrations at the end of their event, and so generally that's when a lot of this takes place. Once your event's over, you let your hair down."

As we've previously mentioned, U.S. Olympian soccer player Hope Sol concurs: "70 percent to 75 percent of Olympians are having sex during the Games." But you don't take her word for it. Over 45,000 free condoms were distributed at the Sydney Olympics in 2000, which doesn't sound impressive when compared to the 90,000 distributed in Beijing in 2008. (They originally had provided a mere 70,000 — all printed with the words ‘Faster, Higher, Stronger' — but had to provide an additional 20,000 when the supply was exhausted.)


In addition to all of the pro-athlete boning happening in Fuck City the Olympic Village, competitors have also gone into full-on summer camp mode, sneaking in marijuana and alcohol hidden inside of water bottles.

Both the International Olympic Committee and the British Olympic Association (BOA) recognize the situation, but have taken the same stance: What the athletes do in their spare time is no one else's beeswax.

Says Darryl Seibel of the BOA, "It is a highly personal matter and none of our business."


There you have it, Olympians. Few of you will win, but all of you can score.