THE Conservative leadership candidates are all agreed that Britain has been completely ruined by nine years of Conservative leadership.

The environment secretary, home secretary, foreign secretary, former foreign secretary and a Tory MP confirmed that since 2010 they have run this country into the ground, and they are the only people who can stop it.

Jeremy Hunt said: “If I become prime minister I’ll urgently tackle our failing NHS, which following my six years as health secretary is not fit for purpose. That’s my priority.”

Sajid Javid replied: “For me the key issue is the terrible inequality we’re seeing around the country, a gap that’s yawned even wider under the Tories and which I, as one of those Tories, am dedicated to closing.”

Michael Gove said: “Our education system is in ruins. I did that, so I’m the man to fix it. I won’t shirk that responsibility by passing it to somebody else.”

And frontrunner Boris Johnson agreed: “This isn’t the country I wanted to lead. Sh*t is, simply, f*cked.”

Nathan Muir of Reading said: “I really admire their honesty. I’ll definitely vote for anyone else.”