A Bicyclops Built For Two Close

Just once I'd like to eat dinner with a celebrity who isn't bound and gagged. I decline the title of Iron Cook and accept the lesser title of Zinc Saucier, which I just made up. Uhh… also, comes with double prize money. You guys realize you live in a sewer, right? I don't know what you did, Fry, but once again, you screwed up! Now all the planets are gonna start cracking wise about our mamas. What's with you kids? Every other day it's food, food, food. Alright, I'll get you some stupid food.

A Bicyclops Built For Two

You are the last hope of the universe. The key to victory is discipline, and that means a well made bed. You will practice until you can make your bed in your sleep. Hey! I'm a porno-dealing monster, what do I care what you think? You, minion. Lift my arm. AFTER HIM! Really?!

You can see how I lived before I met you.

Really?!

Would you censor the Venus de Venus just because you can see her spewers?

The Luck of the Fryrish

Ah, computer dating. It's like pimping, but you rarely have to use the phrase "upside your head." My fellow Earthicans, as I have explained in my book 'Earth in the Balance'', and the much more popular ''Harry Potter and the Balance of Earth', we need to defend our planet against pollution. Also dark wizards. And yet you haven't said what I told you to say! How can any of us trust you?

Kif Gets Knocked Up A Notch

You wouldn't. Ask anyway! Hey, guess what you're accessories to. Why am I sticky and naked? Did I miss something fun? You won't have time for sleeping, soldier, not with all the bed making you'll be doing. Now, now. Perfectly symmetrical violence never solved anything. Now, now. Perfectly symmetrical violence never solved anything.

Oh, I don't have time for this. I have to go and buy a single piece of fruit with a coupon and then return it, making people wait behind me while I complain. Okay, it's 500 dollars, you have no choice of carrier, the battery can't hold the charge and the reception isn't very… Why did you bring us here? What are their names?

The Honking

I've got to find a way to escape the horrible ravages of youth. Suddenly, I'm going to the bathroom like clockwork, every three hours. And those jerks at Social Security stopped sending me checks. Now 'I'' have to pay ''them'! I meant 'physically'. Look, perhaps you could let me work for a little food? I could clean the floors or paint a fence, or service you sexually? Spare me your space age technobabble, Attila the Hun!