Ahead of the first Test between England and India, skipper MS Dhoni commenced mind games, claiming its the English batsmen who were under immense pressure to find form against Ishant Sharma or kiss goodbye to their careers. “Well, of course, the whole world knows how Ishant Sharma bowls,” a calm and cool Dhoni said ahead of the Trent Bridge side, ”and so for the likes of Cook, their careers are literally on the line. I mean, losing to Sri Lanka can be attributed to the sheer boredom of playing against them but if these guys can’t click even against an attack led by Ishant Sharma, then I can’t see how the selectors will continue to repose faith in him. Quite frankly, I wouldn’t want to be in Cook’s shoes at the minute.”

“On the other hand,” Dhoni reasoned, ”we have absolutely nothing to lose. I mean we can’t perform any worse than last time. So the boys are all charged up.”

Dhoni also claimed he had no preferences regarding grass in the pitch. “Look, Ishant is a special type of bowler who doesn’t depend on the pitch conditions to aid him. He performs consistently across all conditions. Instead, he will exploit the English batsmen’s anxiety to go after him, and we’ll accordingly set a T-20 field to try and get 20 wickets,” Dhoni revealed.

The English have preferred to maintain a stoic silence over Dhoni’s verbal salvo. “It’s not the end of the world if I fail even against Ishant. All batsmen have their lean patches,” was all that Cook ventured to The UnReal Times.