We love superyachts. Who doesn’t? Vast, elegant and drifting across the ocean like an upturned whale with a pool on top… what’s not to love? In fact, you might say that we’re slightly obsessed. Going to see the Formula 1? Only if we can watch it from a yacht. Going on holiday? Only if I can get there by yacht. Want to play an innocuous family card game? Sure! As long as it’s about yachts. Well, for anyone as obsessed with 50m seafaring behemoths as us, you’re in luck! We can’t whisk you to the Monaco marina or a private Caribbean island, but by God we can ruin family fun with our… let’s say unique take on a classic: yacht trumps.

Faith (Builder: Feadship)

Faith is one of the most balanced superyachts out there. Recently refitted, she can carry 34 crew to cater to 18 guests who, thanks to the yacht’s zero speed stabilisers, are ensured a comfortable stay wherever she anchors for the night. With a landing pad, hanger and all the mod cons the discerning oligarch could need, she’s perfectly equipped for a few weeks island hopping; www.feadship.nl

Aviva (Builder: Abeking & Rasmussen)

Aviva shouldn’t be judged on her length alone – which is already a substantial 98.4m – but her total size. Thanks to her beam, there’s no other boat of her length that can match the volume. If you’re looking for room to actually stretch those sea legs, Aviva more than has you covered, especially if you’re a sportsperson; there’s a padel tennis court on board; www.abeking.com

Dilbar (Builder: Lurssen)

Built under the name ‘Project Omar’, Dilbar used to be the world’s largest yacht until… others came along, but with 3,800 square metres of living space aboard she’s more than large enough for most owners. It also contains the largest superyacht pool in existence, at 25m, and twin helicopter pads. She’s not the fastest, but she’s a big girl; www.lurssen.com

Sailing Yacht A (Builder: Nobiskrug)

Pure elegance on the water, this sail-assisted motor yacht is as smooth a ride as she looks. She’s also surprisingly well-equipped for a vessel of her size, with two helicopter pads (one’s a touch and go), the usual spa facilities and a breath-taking curved glass observation pod on the hull – perfect for coral spying without actually having to get your feet wet; www.nobiskrug.com

World is Not Enough (Builder: Neptunus – Millenium)

Small but perfectly formed, World is Not Enough can hold a surprising 10 guests, not bad for her modest 42.4m length. Still, that’s not really her thing; she’s all about movement. Her top speed of 70 knots is spectacular and is thankfully paired with a roll stabilisation system, making that performance immensely fun rather than vomit-inducing; www.neptunusyachts.com

Foners (Builder: Izar)

Almost as fast as World is Not Enough, Foners is a little more petite but makes up for it with sumptuous interiors designed by Celeste Dell`Anna. She looks almost as lovely from the outside – if you manage to catch a glimpse of her, of course, which is easier said than done. Given her 68 knots maximum speed she can outstrip nearly all other ships on the water.

Rev (Builder: Vard)

This might be a little cheat as she’s not actually finishing for a couple of years, but given that Rev is set to take Azzam’s spot as the largest superyacht in the world she certainly deserves her place. She is however an expedition yacht, built to tackle marine research missions, though whoever gets to take her out will be surrounded by pure luxury (and some cutting-edge technology to boot); www.vard.com

Azzam (Builder: Lurssen)

Azzam is arguably the most famous superyacht in the world. It’s not hard to see why; it’s currently the world’s largest, at a staggering 180.61m. She also has a pretty impressive turn of speed, thanks to her jet propulsion engines, not to mention her own submarine and missile defence system. Only the best for the Abu Dhabi Royal Family; www.lurssen.com

Project Norse (Builder: BMT Nigel Gee)

True to its namesake, Project Norse has the endurance and range of a Viking longboat. She can cross oceans without a care in the world and can reach both polar ice caps with ease. Her shallow draft even allows her access to secluded anchorages that deeper yachts could only dream of. In short, she is the ultimate exploration yacht; www.bmtng.com

Adastra (Builder: McConaghy Boats)

It might not be the fastest or largest in the world, but Adastra is most definitely among the coolest, looking nothing at all like a traditional superyacht. She can also manage a more than respectable 10,000 nm in range, easily outclassing her 42.5m size. If you’re a Bond villain cruising the Med, this one’s for you; www.mcconaghyboats.com