For transgender victims, respect starts with using name they chose

For more than 24 hours — ever since officials identified Feral Pines as one of the victims of the Ghost Ship fire — Eliza Wicks-Frank fielded calls from friends. Pines had once been Wicks-Frank’s partner; they’d spent five years together. People wanted to know what they could do, how they could help.

Just watch the media, Wicks-Frank kept telling them. Wicks-Frank had seen news reports about the fire victims reference a birth name Pines hadn’t used for more than a decade and a pronoun that didn’t reflect Pines’ gender identity. Wicks-Frank asked friends to call and correct them. Feral Pines was her name. She was a transgender woman.

“It’s alien. It’s infuriating,” said Wicks-Frank, who uses gender-neutral pronouns.

Kenzie Borland, an artist, cries at a vigil for the December 2, 206 Oakland warehouse fire that killed at least 36 people in the San Francisco, CA. Castro District on Monday, December 5, 2016, Castro St. and Market. less Kenzie Borland, an artist, cries at a vigil for the December 2, 206 Oakland warehouse fire that killed at least 36 people in the San Francisco, CA. Castro District on Monday, December 5, 2016, Castro St. and ... more Photo: Paul Kuroda, Special To The Chronicle Buy photo Photo: Paul Kuroda, Special To The Chronicle Image 1 of / 124 Caption Close For transgender victims, respect starts with using name they chose 1 / 124 Back to Gallery

It’s a practice called deadnaming in trans communities — and while it’s sometimes done accidentally, it’s also sometimes done intentionally to deny and oppress trans people.

“The impact that this lack of dignity and awareness has on the community of trans people who are alive right now is it tells them that their fight is irrelevant, that they’re going to be disrespected regardless of how they fight to live their lives,” Wicks-Frank said.

Officials and the media frequently face challenges in trying to identify victims in situations like these. In the case of the Oakland warehouse fire, given the number of trans and queer individuals affected, the challenge is particularly acute. Pines is one of three trans women confirmed dead in the fire, along with Cash Askew and Em B, also known as Em Bohlka.

“That’s been tough to navigate,” said Alameda County Sheriff's Department Sgt. Ray Kelly. “It’s a very sensitive topic.”

On Monday, as information came in about the deceased, the sheriff’s department tweeted out a list of names. Pines was listed using a legal birth name she hasn’t had a connection to in years. The department very quickly got push-back from friends who knew better. “We are fixing this,” the department tweeted back. “We care deeply about the trans community. We honor & respect the memory & identity of Feral Pines.”

But already a flurry of media reports had picked up the information and repeated her birth name and pronoun. “Many times I had conversations with her about how her greatest fear in death was being misrepresented for her true self,” Wicks-Frank said. “It’s about dignity in death.”

Kelly says the department is trying to address issues around identity head-on. They’re working with Tiffany Woods, a consultant on transgender issues, to get their information in sync with what the community is saying.

“We want to make sure everybody is respected and has dignity right now,” Woods said. “Your name and your identity are who you are at your core. When it’s not respected, you don’t have dignity in death.”

Discrepancies, Woods says, can come up for a number of reasons. Some trans people may have families who aren’t aware of or aren’t supportive of their gender identity. Others, she says, may still have legal names that they no longer identify with. Those are the names officials tend to use, at least in first reports.

Woods says she reached out to the Alameda County Sheriff’s Department as soon as she realized trans and queer people were killed in the blaze. “We’re trying to anticipate this. We’ve had intentional conversations around this since the beginning.”

Wicks-Frank understands some of these difficulties. They say they’ve heard of gatherings where trans and queer people will get together with a notary and sketch out advance directives in case of these very situations. Legal name changes can be both expensive and time-consuming. “It sucks that it’s a necessary aspect of living and dying in dignity.”

As for Pines, the city of Oakland tweeted out a new list Tuesday afternoon that had her as Wicks-Frank knew her. “Feral Pines, 29, Berkeley, Calif.” Though even that name was only sort of right.

“She was a person of multiplicities, and she didn’t always have one name,” Wicks-Frank said. “It depended who you asked and how you related to each other. Her life was complex.”

Chronicle staff writer Hamed Aleaziz contributed to this report.

Ryan Kost is a San Francisco Chronicle staff writer. Email: rkost@sfchronicle.com

Twitter: @RyanKost