Arizona Senator John McCain is such a tireless advocate for his constituents back home that he rarely leaves Capitol Hill or Raytheon's Manhattan corporate penthouse.

But yesterday he had the opportunity to fly to Australia to mingle with voters and "throw some bullshit on the barbie", as they say in Arizona.

Arizona's most prized cactus flower

As an Arizona Senator in Australia, McCain touched on all the big local issues:

During a visit to Canberra, Senator McCain said Mr Putin was the "premier and most important threat, more so than ISIS". "I think ISIS can do terrible things. But it's the Russians who tried to destroy the fundamental of democracy and that is to change the outcome of an American election," he said. "I've seen no evidence they succeeded, but they tried and they are still trying to change elections."

Indeed. Beheadings, rape, torture, murder—all the standard ISIS shenanigans pale in comparison to Putin and all his terrible meddling (source: anonymous official cited by the Washington Post).

Oh, and there's more:

On allegations that White House adviser Jared Kushner discussed a secret communication channel with Russia, Mr. McCain said: "I don't like it, I just don't."

Well, that settles it.

Does John McCain even know that you can speak with other nations? This bitter old idiot doesn't like anything that doesn't involve extensive bombings, uninvited military occupations and general mayhem and destruction.

You know that old Beach Boys song, Bomb Iran? Bomb bomb bomb, bomb bomb Iran." — John McCain breaking into song after being asked at a VFW meeting about whether it was time to send a message to Iran. John McCain - Murrells Inlet, South Carolina, April 18, 2007. via www.thoughtco.com

But don’t think this old gopher can’t still get around. Back in February, McCain escaped from the assisted living compound to meet with nice guys/ISIS supporters and Saudi do-gooders to "assess dynamic conditions on the ground in Syria and Iraq":

Returning for a moment to his barbecue shindig with his Australian constituents, here's what McCain said about North Korea nuking Australia:

"I don't think it's acceptable for the United States of America to have an intercontinental ballistic missile — or a missile aimed at Australia — with a nuclear weapon on it, and depend on our ability to counter it with an anti-missile capability."

Because the United States never points nuclear missiles at anyone—that would be unacceptable.

We don't think it's acceptable for John McCain to open his mouth ever again.

Decker writes for DispatchesfromtheAsylum.com, a website dedicated to observing various modern day absurdities, nuttiness and insanity and ripping them apart via the written word