State Rep. Sheila Butt — noted author of Does God Love Michael's Two Daddies? (which teaches young children that gay parents are destined for hell) and Everyday Princess: Daughter of the King (which suggests interracial dating isn't a good thing, at least in the South), wife of Stan Butt, who definitely did not steal a trailer last summer, and mother of Cliff, 40, who was arrested for partying with high schoolers — has filed an important piece of legislation that will solve our state's obesity problem in one fell swoop.

Ha. Just kidding. What HB 43 would actually do is prohibit food stamps from being used "to purchase food items that are high in calories, sugar, and fat without any nutritional value, including, but not limited to, soda, ice cream, candy, cookies, and cake." That's right, kids — if you're poor, you don't deserve a birthday cake because it will make you fat!

As of November 2016, the last month for which data is available, there were 1,077,014 individuals — 525,501 households — in Tennessee utilizing the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program (SNAP, which is the new terminology for food stamps, because there are no more stamps any more, there's a debit card). In Maury County, which Butt represents, there were 11,883 people (5,736 households) using SNAP in November. They aren't all obese. But no matter how skinny you are, Butt thinks she knows better than you what's healthy.

Since the definition of high in calories and sugar would seemingly exclude Diet Coke, the Scene called Butt to ask what the ban really entailed. She said that the list of prohibited items would actually be issued by the U.S. Department of Agriculture once it grants the state a waiver to ban junk food for poor people.

"We have so much obesity in this state that we can't just sit around and do nothing," Butt said.

But what about overweight people who aren't on food stamps, like, say, her son Cliff? Would Butt support a soda tax or a tax of fast food? Despite pressing her repeatedly, Butt refused to answer the question.

"I'm not going to discuss hypotheticals," Butt said. "That's so far down the road, I can't even think about it right now."

We also asked Butt if her husband Stan, the executive director of the Tennessee Dairy Producers Association, supported her legislation. Banning over 1 million people from being able to buy ice cream sounds very much like a bill that dairy farmers would strongly oppose. Again, Butt refused to answer the question, changing the subject entirely.

"This is something that's been filed in a lot of other states," Butt said.

Has it passed in any other state? the Scene asked.

"No," Butt admitted. "But I'm sure other states are taking this up right now."

Besides being grotesque and offensive, Butt's legislation is also non-functional.

First of all, why is Butt only targeting food high in calories that have no nutritional value? Iceberg lettuce = delicious in a wedge salad, but no nutritional value. Rice cakes = gross as hell but low-cal and also no nutritional value.

Secondly, why not target sodium, which is arguably far more unhealthy than fat? Why not ban foods with high levels of bad cholesterol? What about foods that don't have enough of the recommended daily allowance of vitamins and minerals?

Finally, even if the USDA does let Tennessee ban junk food from SNAP purchases, it still can't ban "unhealthy" food. A ban of "items that are high in calories, sugar, and fat without any nutritional value" is going to exclude a lot of raw ingredients. You may not be able to buy a pre-made cake at Publix, but you can buy eggs and flour and butter and sugar and bake your own. So you can't buy Tostitos — you can buy tortillas and oil and fry up your own chips. And, yes, most people that need SNAP assistance to feed their children or themselves already don't have the time to cook, and many live in food deserts where junk food at the corner store is the only shopping option within walking distance. (And, yes, no one wants to cook their own corn chips anyway.) But unless the USDA prohibited list is the Whole30 prohibited list, families will still be able assemble ingredients together and make high calorie, high fat, somewhat unhealthy items like macaroni and cheese, pan-fried okra and peanut butter sandwiches.

It's interesting to see Butt complain nonstop about federal overreach into states rights — like allowing gay marriage or transgender-friendly school bathrooms — and, at the same time, micromanage what poor people, and only poor people, eat.