Remember Liz Cheney?

The blonde spawn created during an unholy union between a man and woman for the express purpose of keeping the man out of the draft during the Vietnam war? The woman who threw her sister’s gay-marriage under the bus and then drove over it, back and forth, until it looked like the face of a guy who’d been shot by a vice-president? The lady whose family managed to almost alienate everyone in a state with a population equal to that of a slow day at Disneyland? The woman who quit the race faster than a Palin gets pregnant? The desolate and rocky place where charisma can find no purchase and the sun never shines?

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That Liz Cheney? Yeah, her.

Seems like she was less than honest about how much money her campaign was taking in by having her dad call old friends and suggest (“You’ve got a nice face. Be a shame if somebody shot you in it“) they make a contribution. According to TPM, Liz claimed she raised $1 million during the fourth quarter and, like a dating profile on eHarmony, there was some ‘untruth’ involved:

While Cheney was running she claimed that she raised $1 million in the fourth quarter of 2013, which was more than the $847,646 Enzi said he raised in the same period. It turns out though, she raised much less than what she claimed, according to Federal Election Commission reports highlighted by National Journal. National Journal reports that Cheney actually raised $720,000 in the fourth quarter of 2013 and her campaign spent over $900,000.

That $900,000 was also more than any non-incumbent candidate in any of the better states spent for the same period.

So, to sum up: despite her family’s name, Liz Cheney couldn’t get her dads friends to donate more than whatever change they had in their car’s ashtray. Additionally, the people of Wyoming hated her no matter how much she tried to buy their love.

Basically Liz Cheney is about as popular in Wyoming and elsewhere as a gay pride parade during Laramie Sheep Week….