So I think I may be a fictionkin, if that's the word used to describe it (I hate the word a lot). A bit back, I watched the first episode of a show, and the day after I had started to use affectionate nicknames the main character had used, and started thinking of myself in terms of the main character; I also find it weird to say their name in 3rd person. I've also found my tastes aligning more with them, and fears aligning more too, over time. What does this mean?

It can mean that you identify as this person which would make you fictionkin.

It can also mean that this character is really well written and appeals to you in a way that makes you identify super strongly With the character.

You’re the only one who can really dig down and work out which it is, but I have some suggestions as to how you can try and answer the question in a way that you can put some trust in.

First, stop watching the show.

Block the tags relevant to the show.

Both of these are temporary steps.



Then get a notebook and write down your current thoughts regarding the character and your relation thereto.

This is important.

Writing things down is Super important.



Our minds and memories are malleable, but the words on paper won’t change.

This is your anchor.



Then, using meditation, or music, or whatever helps you focus, try to work out what happens next.

Without spoilers, without watching the show, you’re likely to work out some of the next steps in the character’s story correctly, because media is nothing if not full of foreshadowing.

Do not speculate too much, try and write down what you “know” is coming, don’t worry about how you know it, just write it.

Don’t settle for one thing.

Write every little thing you can muster.



If you are this character, you should already know a fair bit.

If you have no idea what comes next, odds are, you’re simply identifying with the character.

When you’ve written down at least a half dozen things, preferably considerably more, and there’s literally nothing more left to write down, then you can unblock the tags and start re-watching the series.



Then you can see how much you got right, and how obviously these things were coming.

If all you got right was the obvious stuff, then you’re likely just identifying with the character.

If you got most of it wrong, then you’re likely just identifying with the character.



If you got most of the things right, even little things that you had no business knowing, things that you were sure were coming even if there was nothing in the series to this point to indicate it, and with an uncanny accuracy… well then… there can hardly be any question as to who you are can there?



This is only one method however, whatever you do, it’ll always take real work to really get an answer to that question “Who and what am I?”