As her elderly father lay in the ICU recovering from two brain surgeries in a week and a half, Tanya Evers-Jordan worried how the family would comfort him in the era of COVID-19.

The hospital where he’s staying had made the painful but necessary decision to keep visitors away — especially from intensive care, where Tony Evers has been since arriving at Trillium Health Partners’ Mississauga Hospital March 8 to deal with a brain tumour.

For a few days after his first surgery, which was only partly successful in removing the tumour, one or two relatives were able to visit Evers, while taking precautions like wearing masks. But by March 21, as COVID-19’s deadly toll grew around the world, the doors slammed shut.

For her stepmother Denise Evers, it was particularly hard. While Denise could still speak to her husband on the phone briefly twice a day, not being able to see his face was heartbreaking, especially after a second surgery, to remove fluid from his brain after he got diagnosed with meningitis while in hospital.

“They’re inseparable. They haven’t been apart in 30 or 40 years,” said Evers-Jordan of her father and stepmother.

Paul Marek, a nurse working in the intensive care unit, had a suggestion that would change the family’s outlook, Denise’s mood, and quite possibly, Tony’s health.

“Paul said ‘Well, I’ve got a phone. Why don’t we FaceTime?’ My stepmother didn’t know what that was, so my sister got in touch with Paul, and we ended up arranging a video chat on Facebook,” said Evers-Jordan, her voice filled with emotion at the memory of the first chat (there have now been three).

The Evers family joined in on a video conference call after Tony Evers, lower left, had brain surgery in a Mississauga hospital.

“There were about eight of us on the call with dad. My stepmother just started bawling. We had to tell her to keep it together. He just perked right up. ‘Hi guys, how are you?’”

Those chats have been a bright spot both for the family and, Evers-Jordan believes, her father.

“For the first time in days, it’s given us some hope he’ll be getting better,” she said. “I hope Paul realized how special a gift he’s given us.”

That gift, by the way, came at Marek’s personal expense. There’s no wifi in the ICU, so the video chats came through his own phone and data plan. When Evers-Jordan, her stepmother and sisters Courtney Evers and Bria Jordan tried to pay him back, he shook it off, saying that as a member of a regulated healthcare profession, he wasn’t allowed to accept what would be considered a gift.

Marek, during a phone interview, insisted connecting Tony Evers with his family was no big deal and said it was an instinctive response.

“Listening to Mrs. Evers over the phone, it was so clear how much she loves her husband. And she’s just such a nice lady. How could I not help?,” said Marek, who has worked as an ICU nurse for more than 20 years.

Normally, ICU nurses try to keep the emotional toll of their work at bay, said Marek. Otherwise, it can simply become too much to function, especially during the midst of a global pandemic.

“I usually distance myself. You try to keep yourself emotionally distant. You do the best you can,” said Marek. Still, making sure that patients are well involves more than checking their vital signs, administering medications, and tending to surgical sites. Sometimes, Marek says, healing involves more than just the body. He had a professional and moral obligation to do help his patient.

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“Yes, we look after their body, but their mind and soul as well. It gives people a sense of security and comfort when they see someone they love. I absolutely believe it helps with their physical well-being too. I’ve seen it happen,” said Marek.

Evers-Jordan and the rest of her family, will be forever grateful to Marek for his gesture.

“He’s given us hope in a hopeless situation. How do you thank someone for giving you hope?”

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