You may think it’s a Troll Blog, but the fact is that I am not here to troll.

I find that the feminist commentary I come across is generally so fantastical and entertainingly misguided, I cannot but help but gleefully wade into the shit.

Some of my favorites come from the Blog “Liesthepatriarchytoldme”. The pure genius of some of that crap is mind-blowing. It is as if I took the collective wisdom and ignorant misconceptions of my local Jr High school girls choir class, and somehow ascribe it to how the real world works.

I would love to be able to spy on the conversation between some of these (i presume young girls) and their fathers should they make those same statements posed as questions. Were my own daughter to be so fantastically stupid, I would feel a complete failure as a father.

Next come the self-professed “smash the patriarchy” crowd. This group amuses me beyond what is reasonable.

The chair-born SJ Warrior resounding their battle cry in the vacuous halls of tumblr, echoing among their sycophants, declaring independence from The Patriarchy! Yes, all while attending university (which is apparently a construct of the Patriarchy), or still living at home (dependent upon ‘The Patriarchy’ in the form of parents), or crying “Donate Donate Donate!” due to the inadequacy of some dead-end job; the natural result of their useless liberal arts degree (clearly The Patriarchy does not value, Womyns Studies!).

Oh, I am no troll - I am The Patriarchy. I represent everything this crowd hates.

I came from little means, put myself through a STEM degree in college by working, have clawed my way into the middle class, and am perpetuating this ethic to my children. My wife is a stay-at-home mom by choice, while also being college educated. I live in the suburbs, in a big house. I take vacations. I believe success comes from hard work and hard work only. The value of your work is all that matters to me, not the color of your skin or the religion you embrace. If you work for me, I don’t give a shit what your problems are. If you cannot do the job, the next person can.

I am everything they hate, and I embrace it… I roll in that hatred like the pig they believe me to be in the shit they spew.

I do so with glee.