The Hudson Valley-themed episode of No Reservations, featured some of the most surreal moments on the show to date. Among other things, Tony shared a steak dinner with Bill Murray, drove around in a vintage muscle car with Michael Ruhlman, hit up an old hotel for a Shining-themed bit, had lunch on a floating hot dog stand, got mercilessly teased by a little girl in a backyard barbecue, and returned to his former culinary school, where he hawked No Reservations t-shirts to star-struck culinary students. With all of this wackiness, some classic Bourdain one-liners were inevitable. On to The Quotable Bourdain from last night's episode; don't forget to add your favorite zingers in the comments:



1) On a chef's apron: "These are a little skimpy, if you didn't' have pants on, you'd be hanging brain."

2) On an old hotel: "Mohonk remains, very much like Nigella Lawson, very strange, but fabulous, all the same. "

3) On a traditional afternoon tea: "In England, they follow this with a spanking, but I don't have time."



4) On the same afternoon tea: "I feel like I should have put on a jacket, and ascot? "

5) On being offered a dubious drink: "Unlicensed hooch from a stranger in a parking lot. Good idea? Yes of course it is."

6) On selling No Reservations T-Shirts to CIA students: "Entrepreneurship, personal enterprise, that's what we're talking about here."

7) On a little girl who is teasing him: "I've never encountered a more incisive critic of my life's work. "

8) On the same little girl: "I bet she doesn't play pranks on Emeril."

9) On Michael Ruhlman: "I don't want to talk smack, but if you look up 'chef' in the dictionary, it says: not you."

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