A spokesman for actor Brad Pitt announced that E! News anchor Giuliana Rancic was found clinging to Pitt’s abdomen and feeding off his blood Wednesday morning.

A spokesman for actor Brad Pitt announced that E! News anchor Giuliana Rancic was found clinging to Pitt’s abdomen and feeding off his blood Wednesday morning.

The parasite was discovered and removed during an insurance physical for the movie star’s upcoming film, “Moneyball.”

“The doctor noticed what he first thought was an abscess on Brad’s left side,” the spokesman said. “Upon closer inspection, it turned out to be celebrity journalist Giuliana Rancic.”

The spokesman added that Pitt most likely contracted the parasite while attending the Los Angeles premiere of wife Angelina Jolie’s most recent film, “Salt,” in July.

“These parasites are notorious for their tenacity and opportunism,” the spokesman said. “All it takes is posing long enough for one photo and you can be covered in paparazzi. We’re just lucky she didn’t pass any [celebrity journalist transmitted diseases] to Brad.

“This is actually a good reminder to all A-list stars out there to check yourselves when you get home from any kind of red carpet event,” the spokesman added. “Also, make sure you wear lots of DEET and tuck your pant legs into your socks when venturing into the Hollywood area.”

Pitt is only the most recent in a long line of actors to host a celebrity journalist.

In June, it was discovered that Perez Hilton had been blogging from Miley Cyrus’ hair and feeding off dead skin and residual adulation for more than two months.

Gawker Media creator Nick Denton spent about six weeks in 2009 embedded in Jennifer Anniston’s small intestines filing reports about her relationship status until she was able to rid herself of the Internet entrepreneur with several doses of a powerful anthelmintic.

In what may be the most serious recorded case of celebrity journalist parasitism, actor George Clooney was nearly killed in May 2006 when E! News host and television personality Ryan Seacrest burrowed into Clooney’s lower back and laid a brood of eggs at the base of his spine.

“I had never seen anything like it,” said Dr. Kevin Stromberg, who operated to remove the infestation from Clooney’s back.

“Imagine six dozen tiny Ryan Seacrests bursting from your skin and asking inane, useless questions about how to get fit before Oscar season or who designed the dress you were wearing,” Stromberg added. “I’ll be honest, it was terrifying.”

The celebrity journalist outbreak reached such pandemic proportions after Michael Jackson’s death in June 2009 that the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention added celebrity news organization TMZ to its list of emerging pathogens alongside HIV and People magazine.

“Though celebrity parasites have been plaguing Hollywood since the silent movie era, the last few years have been especially hard on actors and musicians,” said CDC Infectious Disease Specialist Dr. Martin Goodman.

“With Twitter, YouTube and a score of other technologies, these parasites are evolving faster than our ability to fight them,” Dr. Goodman added. “If we don’t act quickly, even cut-rate celebrities like Channing Tatum and — Oh, what’s her name? That terrible girl from ‘Van Wilder,’ oh! Tara Reid! — Even crappy celebrities like Tara Reid could be at risk of infection.”

Dr. Goodman said the first step to eradicating these parasites was trying to understand them.

Rancic will be kept alive on a steady diet of simple amino acids and episodes of “Keeping Up with the Kardashians” so that scientists can study her feeding habits.

“After that, we’ll probably just flush her,” Dr. Goodman said.

Contact John Houder at jhouder@gmail.com.