After he and his friends trademarked SpeedDating, they began the process of filing a patent. But as the trend exploded, Deyo realized he had lost control of the idea. “I don’t want to spend the rest of my life writing letters to a roadhouse outside of Atlanta to tell them they can’t do an event,” he says. And so he decided to release it into the world. “In Judaism, there’s a concept of zechus — the merit that is created by a good action,” he says. In other words, it would be good karma to give away speed dating to anyone who wanted it, and — God willing — it would produce lots of marriages and babies. “To see your actions unfold in a good way makes for a happier existence,” Deyo says. “And I’m a happy guy.”

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SUPER SAD TRUE LOVE

Evan Marc Katz has worked as a dating coach since 2003.

Is speed dating a good way to meet people? The problem is that you get a random sample of people, the same as if you walked into a subway car and threw a dart. On Match.com, you might not meet as many people in a month, but you will get to choose those people. Online dating has better return on investment.

What about people who hate online dating? Saying that online dating sucks is like saying that the gym sucks because you’re not losing any weight. It’s great if you know how to use it. Of course, speed dating is good for practicing real-life interactions. It’s another tool in the toolshed for my clients.

When Yaacov Deyo created speed dating, he included a reputation-management feedback form, similar to eBay’s. Participants who were not polite or respectful would be banned from future events. Can that be built into online dating? People have tried. But it’s hard to get honest feedback. Dating is way more personal than “Hey, I didn’t like this book on Amazon.” If I went out with someone three times and hooked up a bit, I might decide “She’s O.K., but she’s not the one.” And that’s fair. But she may report, “He used me.” It’s hard to prevent someone from coming home from a bad date and ripping someone a new one.

How will dating change in the future? On the one hand, technology flattens the world and gives us access to people everywhere, but it also makes us look past people or screen them out. We treat people as disposable. And that reminds me of another point in favor of speed dating: Online you might not go out with that 5-foot-9 guy, but if you’re meeting him in person, you give him a chance.