Do you believe there is nothing as telling as looking a person in the eye or shaking their hand? Do you like to talk for hours on the phone? Do you find voicemails that say “call me back” endlessly irritating?

You’re probably not alone. In fact, communication styles ripple across generations and are felt by all of us. Below I explore a few of the nuances that help define some of these barriers and how to cross them.

Baby Boomers:

When the power of love overcomes the love of power the world will know peace. — Jimi Hendrix

This group has been at it the longest and is most traditional in their communication styles. Ranging from 53–74 years of age they are the leaders of our country, founders of much of our current political system, and the most conservative of the three.

If you’re a Boomer you are most likely to answer “yes” to the above question regarding eye contact and handshakes. You trust your gut because you’ve learned a lot about people over the years and there are certain things you can’t get from and email, phone call, or even a video conference call.

If you’re resistant to change you may be missing out on the lives of your loved ones, or the community you could be building online if you’re struggling with staying active and connected. In the workplace, you could be missing out on lucrative opportunities because you insist on paper filing systems or resist cloud based information storage. Your distrust for these things is not unfounded but if you embrace your fear it could be your undoing.

If you are struggling to understand or adapt to new ways of sharing information try to keep in mind one very important thing that your younger peers have grown up knowing; the internet is a powerful source of information. Almost any question you have can be answered to a relative degree of certainty after enough research. Websites like Google, YouTube, Reddit, Quora, and scientific research from NCBI are your friends.

Those of you who have stayed current with technology have become some of the most influential and powerful people in the world. While Boomers are not known for their texting or tweeting savvy, a 70+ year old orange man trolled his way into one of the highest positions in the world and is America’s acting president.

Not all that power has been used for gerrymandering and bullying though. You have also brought us Stephan Hawking, Angela Merkel, Madonna, and Oprah. You have shaped the globe, for better or worse. If you embrace the new and keep current you are unstoppable with your years of experience and almost otherworldly instincts. If you fail to adapt you run the risk of becoming flanked by the very system you built.

Gen Xers:

I see the whole concept of Generation X implies that everyone has lost hope. — Alanis Morissette

Born somewhere between the late 60’s and early 80’s this is the group of big brothers and sisters who paved the way but received little credit. A small generation in numbers, but mighty in ideas. They made a safe place for geeks, nerds, and outliers to call home in the forums, chatrooms and social media platforms, but still stick to some more traditional forms of communication in their personal lives.

If you’re a Gen Xer you’re most likely to answer “yes” to the question about enjoying long phone conversations. When you were coming of age a personal phone line was a ticket to an active social life and long-distance was available on a limited and costly basis.

You were the first to embrace hands free calling and bluetooth headsets. You were the first generation to create a subtle blur between crazy and eccentric while you shouted and mumbled nonsensically to yourselves in public with these stealthy devices.

There is a dark side, however, when combination of your hard work and under-appreciated-ness leaves some of you biter and solitary. Still, many of you persist by using your education and experience to help younger peers adapt in the workplace and act as a filter between older more conservative generations.

You’ve taken the cynicism you were known for in your teenage years as the MTV generation and turned it into powerful critical thinking skills. You’ve taken the laziness you were accused of and turned it into efficiency, building the framework of the future.

The prolific Elon Musk is amongst your ranks and his influence is interplanetary. You are determined, like Sara Blakely, to build the world you envision and refuse to settle for status quo. When you put your mind to it, you are unstoppable. Combining traditional wisdom with futuristic perception you are some of the most dynamic players in the game when you chose to play. If you fail to overcome your turbulent past or hermit-like tendencies you may be missing out on your full potential.

Millennials:

I learned, when I look in the mirror and tell my story, that I should be myself and not peep whatever everybody is doing. — Kendrick Lamar

Born between the early 80’s and late 90’s this generation is known for being more liberal and less religious than their predecessors. They are less likely to have a landline or cable subscription and more likely to wait for big decisions like getting married or starting a family.

If you’re a Millennial you most likely identify with the question about annoying voicemails. You would rather text than waste time with the pleasantries and awkwardness of a whole conversation when you need information quickly. You’ve probably been broken up with in a text or email and don’t trust anybody under the age of 55 without an online presence.

You long for your voice to be heard and to feel connected. You are moving toward cities and dense populations. You value experiences over things and long for meaning in your work. You were called the ADHD generation but it may have been society catching up with the fact that you aren’t motivated by things that don’t interest you.

With this comes a dark truth that more of you are depressed than any generation before you as you struggle with a massive economic inequality with your peers.

When you are successful, you are massively successful. Mark Zuckerberg held the record for youngest billionaire after building the place we all wish our parents hadn’t told our grandparents about. Love him or hate him, he is a great example of what success looks like to Millennials. When you are well supported and able to embrace your passions you can amass great wealth or live a financially secure life just doing what you love.

Answering the crisis that this generation faces would be impossible from my current perspective. As an 80’s baby who hails from the part of America heavily impacted by economic recession, I will get back to you with the answers once I can afford high quality health care while doing what I love. But I can offer one word of advice to my peers who have lived the harder side of this burgeoning generation; seek your passion. (If you know what it is you are better off than I was for the first 30 years of my life). We came of age with technology that has placed incredible potential at our fingertips, but only if we use it wisely.

Even if you don’t have full time to devote to doing what you love, use those moments in between to become an expert in your field. If you love something, you are not alone and there are probably other people who could benefit from your enthusiasm and experiences.

Here is a recent article on 9 master’s degrees you can get online from one of my favorite free learning recourses ever FreeCodeCamp.com. Even though I didn’t decide to pursue coding as a career, it was through that channel that I discovered Medium which I ❤ so much for allowing me to share my passions with the world.

And don’t forget, no matter what your age or communication style, you can always find new ways to connect when you let yourself shine. Don’t believe me, check out Instagram famous Grandma Baddy Winkle.