Take a look at the most insane Saturday morning line-up in history:

No matter where in the world a child is raised, odds are cartoons feature heavily in their upbringing. North Korean kids are no exception , except instead of Scooby Doo they get a state-issued peek in the mouth of madness.

5 Learn Geometry so You Can Defeat America

First of all, if you think North Korea's children's cartoons are all about destroying the evil Americans, well ... you're mostly right.



That was pretty low-hanging fruit.

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For instance, this cartoon stars a young boy who, like every other young boy in history, doesn't want to do his geometry homework. So instead of studying, he doodles an American army helmet and pretends to shoot it with his compass until he falls asleep. He promptly finds himself having every North Korean child's government-sanctioned worst nightmare: an invasion of anthropomorphic American ships.



Led by the infamous USS Jerkface.

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It's up to him and his friends to fight the Americans -- which they do with missile batteries made from school supplies.



Granted, they are probably more effective than North Korea's actual missile batteries.

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At first, the defense of the Homeland goes well, with the children blowing up large numbers of American Naval, uh ... tanks?