Such practices represent one answer to the question of how religions that are ancient, rule-bound, and communal fit into societies that are modern, individualist, and consumerist. Looked at one way, the point of religion is not to be a leisure experience or a form of tourism. Then again, to the extent people value getting a sense of meaning in their lives from religious rituals, why shouldn’t they have the option to measure that value in money?

The irony is that in seeking a spiritual experience through commercial means, people risk doubling down on what causes a great deal of spiritual alienation in the first place: the commodification of everything. Westerners eager to escape the pressures of a consumerist society have long been sampling Eastern spiritual traditions in consumerist ways—just think of all those expensive yoga classes and Buddhist meditation retreats. Now, Shabbat meals have joined the list.

This appetite for Jewish rituals coincides with a growing popular backlash among diaspora and Israeli Jews against recent Israeli government moves that give the Jewish state’s ultra-Orthodox establishment tighter control over religious matters, including conversions and the prayer spaces at Jerusalem’s revered Western Wall. Perhaps individualized interpretations of religion are a response among some of those who chafe at state control over spiritual matters.

To some Jewish innovators, an individualized approach to Judaism makes perfect sense: “Pick and choose is the name of the game,” said the Israeli-born rabbi Amichai Lau-Lavie. “We live in a universal marketplace of ideas, and people are looking at the most compelling and vitally enriching elements of the Jewish tradition.” This phenomenon is by no means unique to Judaism, nor to the present day; as far back as the 1980s the term “cafeteria Catholics” was applied to members of the religion who chose which elements of Catholic doctrine to observe and which to discard.

Five years ago, Lau-Lavie founded New York’s Lab/Shul, which its website describes as a “God-optional” and “experimental community for sacred Jewish gatherings.” This non-Orthodox community offers public pop-up events featuring music, tapas, and drinks on Friday nights, where people are encouraged to put away their phones and connect with others as Shabbat begins. It also sells a Shabbat2Go DIY Kit, including placemats printed with liturgy options and conversation starters.

Lau-Lavie said that Shabbat meals, complete with blessings and ritual hand-washing, are increasingly attractive—even for those who do not participate because they believe God commanded them to, and even for those who are not Jewish.

“The digital, fast-paced urban world is pushing forward some of the oldest social technologies, like sitting around a table,” Lau-Lavie said. “Now take away the Shabbat, take away the Jewish, and that is just a super smart and super needed ritual that people want in their weekend.”