Not every police agency provides a log of its responses, and few do it with the finesse of the Forest Grove Police Department. Every week, we post the goings on as provided by this community 25 miles west of Portland, not because it’s earth-shatteringly important, but because it provides a glimpse into the world of modern small-town policing.

During the week, Forest Grove police officers were engaged in more than 441 activities, both reported and self-initiated. Here are some of the highlights:

July 19

• A man called police to report he was assaulted last fall at a local business and believes the surveillance video that captured the incident was edited, making it look as though he was the instigator, rather than a victim. He asked that FGPD’s “CSI” team forensically analyze the film. He was told to contact a private video specialist.

• A caller reported a man banging on their door, trying their door knob, and yelling in the middle of the night. Officers contacted the man, who showed signs of extreme intoxication and had broken a fence on his way to the residence. He was taken into custody for criminal mischief.

• Police received multiple calls regarding several gun shots heard in a residential area in the middle of the night. Officers did an extensive area check and determined the source was a backfiring motorcycle.

July 20

• A caller asked police to check on an elderly man who was sitting on a bench outside of a store for an extended period of time. The man said he was just waiting for his wife to finish shopping, which the responding married officer completely understood.

• Cornelius police requested Forest Grove officers assist in locating a man who had eluded their officers earlier in the day. Police located the man walking along the highway shortly after he ditched the vehicle. He was arrested.

• Night shift patrol officers heard a vehicle rapidly accelerate and witnessed a man intentionally speed up in the direction of three juveniles who were crossing the street. The man told police he was attempting to scare the children to teach them a lesson. He was arrested for menacing and unlawful use of a vehicle.

July 21

• A caller reported seeing a man walk through a wooded neighborhood area with a roll of toilet paper. Officers were unable to locate anyone or any stray bath tissue in the area.

• A caller reported a suspicious man playing with a water hose from a local business. The man, who was not an employee, said he was watering the plants at the location out of the goodness of his heart. He was arrested, however, after police learned he failed to show up to a previous appointment with his probation officer.

• A woman called police because someone was playing with a remote control car at a community garden, and the dust being kicked up would damage the plants. Police told her no ordinances or laws were being broken.

July 22

• A night shift officer spotted a pickup driving recklessly in a neighborhood then park haphazardly in front of a residence. Police found the man to be noticeably drunk and uncooperative; he denied driving, resisted arrest, was eventually subdued by Taser, and then refused any sort of sobriety tests. The man was arrested and the officer obtained a warrant for a blood test. The man was subsequently lodged at the jail for multiple charges.

• A convenience store employee reported that a man wearing a Cookie Monster shirt came into the location in the middle of the night, opened and ate half a package of cookies, then left the location without paying. The alleged cookie monster was gone by the time police arrived.

• A caller reported a man and woman fighting alongside Highway 47. Police found the woman was detoxing off of drugs, she had fallen, and the man was attempting to help her. Officers transported her to a detox facility.

July 23

• A caller reported a man pacing nervously up and down a residential street talking to himself for an extended period of time late at night. Officers contacted the man, who said he lived in the area and was on the phone with his girlfriend.

• A caller reported that several children were playing with fire in a residential area. The youths were found to be playing with a small fire in a can. Parents quickly rectified the issue.

• The alleged Cookie Monster came into the police station to confess that he had indeed taken a cookie from the convenience store, and that the incident was a misunderstanding. This entry was brought to you by the letters C and T, and the number 3 -- as in Citation for Theft 3.

July 24

• Police responded to a theft in progress along 19th Avenue where a caller reported a man was attempting to gain entry into a vehicle in the caller’s driveway. Officers located the suspect who had a difficult time following police commands. After a brief struggle, police took the man into custody. He was eventually cited and released.

• A caller reported hearing someone yelling for help in the middle of the night. Police found a teenager who had been sprayed with mace or bear repellant. Police received multiple versions of what happened but were unable to determine anyone in particular was at fault. The teen was transported home.

• A market reported that a man walked out of the location with a cart full of merchandise he neglected to pay for, put the items in the trunk of his car, and drove away. A vehicle matching the car’s description was stopped by the Cornelius Police. The man was subsequently arrested for theft.

July 25

• A caller reported that their vehicle had been stolen, recovered, returned, and now contained several bags of property likely belonging to suspects. The items were seized and a follow up investigation was initiated.

• Officers responded to a late-night physical altercation between a man and woman at a local apartment complex. Officers split up the pair, issued citations to both parties for criminal mischief and assault, and sent them on their separate ways.

• A caller reported their friend was making suicidal statements on account of having multiple outstanding warrants. Officers located the man while on a traffic stop. He was taken into custody on a peace officer hold for his safety, and then transported to jail on the outstanding warrants.