Peacock sex is breaking the internet, thanks to one Rajasthan High Court judge

Sex is bad and peacocks never, ever, do it.

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Our science education in schools is pathetic, just like our political system, our administration, our horrible food habits... I mean, what sort of an education doesn’t keep you abreast of the latest science from our ancient vedas, especially about the pious ways in which our great animals and birds reproduce?

Thankfully, the judges in India are here to rectify just that. Rajasthan High Court judge Justice Mahesh Chandra Sharma, who recommended on Wednesday that the cow should be made our national animal, apparently has some lessons to impart on the national bird as well.

Speaking to CNN News18, the High Court judge said that the peacock is our national animal because it’s a ‘lifelong Bhramachari’.

“The peacock is a lifelong Bhramachari (celibate). He never has sex with the peahen. The peahen pecks on the tears of the peacock to get pregnant. That’s how she gives birth to a peacock or a peahen,” Justice MC Sharma declared.

“This is why Lord Krishna also wears the peacock feather. This is why the peacock feather is used by sadhus,” he added.

"Peacock has pious qualities just like cow -- Peahen doesn't need to have sex to get pregnant, it just swallows 'tears' of the peacock" pic.twitter.com/unwucmOFLJ — News18 (@CNNnews18) May 31, 2017

That’s right, y’all. Sex is bad and peacocks never, ever, do it.

With this statement, the judge has unfortunately made the entire country think about sex. Specifically, peacock sex.

And somehow, Newslaundry got hold of some rare footage of a peacock and peahen mating without the presence of tears.

Others on Twitter found the even more rare footage of a peahen drinking tears.

Rare image of peahen drinking tears. pic.twitter.com/m9xOKFKBS2 — Tanmay Bhat (@thetanmay) May 31, 2017

OMG! There’s so much peacock porn out there!

Of course, it was only natural that following Justice MC Sharma’s important life lesson, people would wonder what peacocks and peahens would do if they wanted to cry but not conceive.

Peacock: let's have sex

Peahen: brought contraception?

Peacock takes out the goggles slowly — Krishna Chaitanya (@Chaitanya_Krip) May 31, 2017

Others went on a quest to discover how peahens may have accidentally gotten pregnant.

Peacock: Let's have sex

Peahen: With a name like 'pea cock', you really think you can do it?

Peacock cries, peahen gets pregnant — Rahul Roushan (@rahulroushan) May 31, 2017

Bad peahen! Very bad!

Some, meanwhile, wondered about whether there’s a sudden spike in peacock porn viewing in India. Exasperating farrago!

Forget farrago, time to furiously Google "peacock sex". Also as a lawyer I'm not taking one for the team. This one's all on MC Sharma. https://t.co/VCyvLVw0QS — Nikhil Mehra (@TweetinderKaul) May 31, 2017

Wonder how many are googling , "peacock sex". — charminggenie (@TheCharmedGenie) May 31, 2017

Someone at Google must be wondering why Indians are suddenly interested in peacock sex. — Micro-ambitious (@pal36) May 31, 2017

Just to supplement all the sanskaari lessons by Justice MC Sharma, this person pointed us to an entire documentary on how peacocks mate.

On the contrary peacock as an elaborate process of mating . https://t.co/S28NzBY2lp https://t.co/BGYohioZDd — yashas (@YashasRonie) May 31, 2017

What does the peacock say to the peahen when he is not in the mood? ``Pushpa, I hate tears" #RajasthanJudge #bramhacharipeacock May 31, 2017

*During sex*



Peahen : babe, I need you to finish now



Peacock : I cried so hard and got so far — Pakchikpak Raja Babu (@HaramiParindey) May 31, 2017

Irony is when an engineer tweets about a Peacock's sex life. — GRV (@_InsaneSaint) May 31, 2017