“This game’s fucking gay,” reports Melee Fox main coming from his first PM tournament.

The transition to PM can be a rough start for any Melee veteran, but Bill “Hax’sbutthole” Anderson has seen a particularly frustrating entry to the Brawl Mod after going 0-2 without getting any % on an opponent.

“All he did was chaingrab and then edgeguard me with Wario’s down air. Somebody told me you can meteor cancel it, but what the fuck does that even mean?” said Anderson this past Friday. Reports from TOs in the venue claim Anderson did not even play against a Wario player and instead was double eliminated by his region’s worst Olimar main.

Anderson has determined that from now on he will stick to “real” games and is considering picking up Bayonetta and Cloud in Smash 4.

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