"I'm 38 and had painful periods and flooding from the age of 12. I was diagnosed with endometriosis at 15. In my mid-twenties I had my tubes tied, as I have never wanted children and my endometriosis made it unlikely I'd be able to have them without help anyhow. I managed my periods during my twenties and early thirties with the help of multiple medications but I still had flooding, pain, and very long periods (7–10 days). I was spotting in between periods, and when I had my period I could easily flood through a tampon and pad in 45 minutes.

"When I hit 35 I had finally had enough. I got a referral to a gynaecologist for a laparoscopy, which I'd had before, and I also wanted to ask about an endometrial ablation, a relatively common procedure where the endometrial lining is burned away, meaning you don't have periods. This can be permanent, or the lining can grow back in five years or so but most patients end up with lighter periods if this happens. Crucially, ablation technically renders you infertile – your womb can't support a foetus after it's been done, but this wasn't an issue for me because I'd had my tubes tied 10 years earlier.

"The gynaecologist had a bible on her desk, which made me feel uncomfortable. When I asked about ablation, he said I was only 35, and I had time to "change my mind" about having kids. I reiterated that I'd had my tubes tied, but she insisted it was reversible and that she didn't want me to completely close the door on my fertility.

"I'd had my tubes tied for over a decade and I could potentially have heavy, awful periods for another 20 years. I left the appointment feeling really dejected – like a stupid child who had been patted on the head and told she couldn't know what she wanted.

"When I went back for my laparoscopy three months later I saw a different gynaecologist and asked if it was too late to consider ablation. He looked at my notes and said because I had had my tubes tied there would be no problem with me getting an ablation that day, so I went ahead with it and I haven't had a period since. My life, and health, is so much better.

"I spent the three months between the consultation and operation feeling so patronised and like I didn't know my own mind. It's completely possible for a woman in her mid-thirties, or even mid-twenties, to know that she never wants children and to arrange her life to suit that. Plus, women who know they want children are never told they might 'change their mind'. – Anonymous