acontributor:

THERE ARE THREE FUCKING STORIES SPREADING AROUND TUMBLR LIKE WILDFIRE RIGHT NOW FROM A FUCKING SATIRICAL NEWS SITE. NATIONAL REPORT IS BASICALLY A SHITTY VERSION OF THE ONION.

LET’S SEE, HOW ACCURATE IS THIS WEBSITE WHEN IT COMES TO NEWS? LET’S TAKE A LOOK AT SOME OF THE OTHER STORIES ON THE FRONT PAGE.

AH YES I REMEMBER CLEARLY THE RASH OF PEOPLE GOING AROUND DUMPING BOILING WATER ON PEOPLE AS THE NEW KNOCKOUT GAME. WAS IN ALL THE PAPERS.

WHO CAN FORGET THE GOVERNMENT’S NEW THREE DOLLAR GAS TAX?

LEBRON DID GET SIGNED BY THE CLIPPERS SO THEY COULD MOVE TO VEGAS, I MEAN THAT’S JUST COMMON KNOWLEDGE.

CHECK. YOUR. FUCKING. SOURCES. YOU. IDIOTS

YES I’M MAD