“Everything you read in the mainstream media is 100% true.”

“Please go back to your jobs. If you have not got a job you are a worthless human being.”

“Consume, consume, consume until we have no planet left to consume.”

“What you need to do is buy things that you don’t need, that’s the best way to support the economy.”

“Smiling is bad for the economy. Please DO NOT smile. Please move swiftly to your next shopping experience.”

“It’s very important for the children to be trained in ripping people’s bodies to shreds so come and buy some games filled with lost of killing, destruction and war.”

“Independent thoughts lead to chaos. Thinking is boring. Thinking is hard work and it is not worth the energy.”

“If you see a Buddhist on the street, get them to leave their religion, they are trying to get us to meditate. Meditation is a waste of good shopping time.”

“Miserable people shope more, so please, remain as miserable as you can.”

“Go back to work, when you die you’ll regret you didn’t work more.”

all cribbed from:

THE FUNNIEST AND GREATEST THING I’VE EVER POSTED