Male children are the prisoners of women. Over fifty percent of men are born into single mother households without a father or male authority figure present. Women who choose to keep their children’s father around, do so only on a provisional basis, with the legal right to separate him from his children at any time she chooses. For all intents and purposes, the children are hers, and she merely allows their father to see them.

Even if the father is present, the nurses, therapists, school teachers, and caregivers around the child are virtually all women. The formative years of the life of the average American male are dominated and ruled by women. These years are marked by routine and institutional abuse that pathologizes masculinity and trains men to seek women’s approval more than their own joy.

Infancy

If a child is born male, he is immediately rushed from his mother’s arms to surgery where part of his genitals are cut off in procedure euphemistically known as circumcision. Circumcision is almost always performed without anesthesia, or only an ineffective topical anesthesia, causing the baby to scream in pain as the most sensitive nerve endings on his body are cut off and discarded into the trash (NSFW video).

No medical organization in the world recommends this procedure. America is the only first world country to perform infant circumcision for non-religious reasons. The most common reason given is aesthetic preference—specifically the preference women, who frequently lack comparative sexual experience with the natural male body. Circumcision is the first and greatest change forced on men for women’s approval. The implication of circumcision is that the natural male body is disgusting and diseased, that men are born wrong and in need for fixing, and that the penis and male sexual pleasure is not important.

This procedures teaches the child his feelings do not matter, and that his body is the property of others. While feminists prattle on about “rape culture” and “my body, my rights,” the boy will know on some level that his consent did not matter, and he did not have the right to his own body. This act of sexual violence will be spoken of only in jokes, as will all acts of violence against men.

Childhood

After infancy, the boy is sent to school where over seventy percent of his teachers will be women. Hereafter, it won’t matter if he has a father present, because eight hours a day will be spent attempting to please to women, in an institution run by women for women. School is a feminine environment, where feminine traits like obedience and cooperation are valued over masculine risk taking and challenging.

School teaches boys that their self worth comes from the approval of women through supplication. Boys are told to sit still and obey female authority figures, rather than their own masculine instincts. Just as they were physically disconnected from part of their masculinity in infancy, they will be emotionally disconnected in the school system.

No previous civilization in recorded history would have ever considered imprisoning it’s youngest and most energetic members indoors for eight hours a day, and considered submission to such a system pathological. In our society, natural male behavior and childhood energy is what is pathologized. Boys who refuse to sit still or exhibit the natural male instinct to play, explore, or rough house are frequently drugged or expelled. Over 20% of boys will be given prescription drug meditation.



Imagine if most teachers were male and they were encouraging parents to drug 20% of little girls

— John Durant (@johndurant) March 27, 2014

The message is clear. Supplicate to women, or there is something wrong with you, and we’ll reprogram your mind with drugs till you obey. Just as in infancy the male body was pathologized, in male childhood, the male mind is pathologized.

Adolescence

Having spent his in entire life being forced to supplicate to women for their approval, the average American male repeats this strategy in his romantic efforts. And why not? The entire culture around him reinforces it. Men are portrayed in popular media as incompetent and clueless with women, and those who are competent are labeled assholes, players, and users of women.

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The only sources most young men have about women are the mainstream media, the internet, their equally clueless peers, and women around them. Women’s concern when teaching men about sexuality isn’t men’s success, but women’s comfort. Neither men nor women seek comfort in romantic relationships, we seek excitement. Women’s advice on approaching women fails catastrophically for most men.

Men enter the world of sexuality with little or no guidance on the questions that actually concern them. When they ask questions about how to get girls, they are shunned as predatory and accused of objectifying women. By this point, the idea that men’s pleasure does not matter, and men should seek women’s approval is so thoroughly ingrained that men have trouble even talking about their sexual questions.

Unable to sleep with women, young men turn to pornography. The average American male will see more pornography at thirteen than existed in the world fifty years ago. Watching pornography actually changes the brain, reorienting men’s arousal from his own personal experience, to a thirst for passively received novelty. Many men who have quit porn have found their social skills and focus dramatically improved. For this reason, social awkwardness is increasing among men, in scientifically observable ways.

While the man watching porn is told he is objectifying and degrading women, but the woman doing porn is told she is empowered. This is because a man watching porn is not seeking a woman’s approval, whereas the woman doing porn is looking for approval. In either case, the concern is always women’s approval, not for the man who lacks the skills to find sexual pleasure with actual women.

Backlash

Every stage of this process occurs only with the conscious consent and action of women. A man could easily reach the age of twenty without knowing a single adult male mentor, including his own father. The system of nurses, teachers, and therapists perpetuating the abuse of the American male are female dominated professions.

After over a decade of abuse, what attitudes do you think most men will have toward women?

There are two ways human being respond to unhealed trauma—they repress the experience, or act it out on others. Facing abuse is incredibly difficult, and facing unacknowledged institutional abuse is even more difficult. Most men prefer to say “I’m fine,” take the blue pill, and shove their feelings down. They label anyone who calls attention to their abuse a misogynist, and continue the pattern of seeking women’s approval formed in childhood.

The other path is bitterness and acting out the abuse through genuine chauvinism. Women frequently accuse men with negative attitudes about women of having “mommy issues,” but the problem actually goes much deeper. Men have issues in every female dominated setting from school to birthing industry. Even the therapists men might seek to discuss these issues with are mostly women. If men hate women, it isn’t because of lack of experience, since women dominate men’s early life. Whatever men become, it what their female caregivers have made them.

There is a third path—healing. Healing requires fully feeling and acknowledging the abuse and allowing yourself to let go of the patterns associated with it while still holding the perpetrators responsible accountable. In this case, ending the institutional abuses of men require men to stop caring about what women think about them, value their own pleasure and sexual experience more than women’s approval, and find ways to play, explore, and grow free from women’s constraints.

All of this can be avoided by not abusing men in the first place. Natural male instincts are entirely healthy, and do not require correction through surgery, drugs, or forced cultural conditioning. Men are not born wanting to supplicate to or hate women. The qualities women dislike in men can be traced back to the treatment men routinely receive at the hands of women when they are young. When women value the masculine, and reflect that value in how they treat men during their earliest years, they will get the men they desire. Until then men must liberate themselves by putting their own joy, freedom, and purpose first.

Read More: An American Beta Male Story