Will Greenlee

will.greenlee@tcpalm.com

PORT ST. LUCIE — A “severely dangerous” dude accused in an extra dry champagne heist said he wanted to be arrested for a “vacation.”

The case of the bubbly boosting bandit popped Jan. 18 in Port St. Lucie at a 7-Eleven store on Southeast Prima Vista Boulevard, an arrest affidavit states.

A store clerk pointed out a man identified by St. Lucie County Sheriff’s deputies as 21-year-old Joseph Shaughnessy.

Puffing on a cigarette while sitting on a curb, Shaughnessy had a bottle of champagne between his feet.

“It didn’t even taste that good,” he is quoted as saying.

The clerk told investigators he saw Shaughnessy enter the store and walk toward the booze cooler. The clerk said Shaughnessy reported he was walking out with a bottle of champagne, a sparkling wine often produced in France.

Shaughnessy insisted the clerk call authorities, saying he wanted to be arrested.

“(The clerk) said Shaughnessy stated it would be a vacation,” the affidavit states.

Deputies evidently obliged Shaughnessy and arrested him on a shoplifting charge in connection with the swiped $8.99 bottle of extra dry bubbly.

On the ride to jail, Shaughnessy said he couldn’t have a cellmate because he’s “severely dangerous.”

“He just wants to go to jail so he can change his life to do the right thing when he gets out, but he cannot have a cellmate, it would be dangerous,” the affidavit states.