(I have albinism, so I have very pale skin, white hair, and red irises.)

Me: “Hi. What can I get for you?”

Customer: “Are… are you a vampire?”

Me: “Well, my dad is half-vampire.” *laughing*

Customer: “Please, don’t bite me.”

Me: “Ma’am, I’m not going to bite you.”

Customer: “Don’t put any blood in my food either. I don’t want to be a vampire.”

Me: “Ma’am, I’m not going to put blood in your food. I’m not a vampire. We serve regular food here.”

Customer: “Let me speak to your manager.”

(I go and get my manager, and fill him in on what’s going on.)

Customer: *to my manager* “Is your vampire waitress going to bite me?”

Manager: “Only if you don’t tip her well.”

(The woman looks completely horrified, but finally ends up ordering and leaving me a 21% tip.)

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