Yesterday I picked up 1,000+ used VHS tapes for $100. Join me as I look back on the 7-hour process of sorting, organizing and rationalizing my decision…

144 video tapes in one box weighs more than you think. Normally I deal with vinyl records – a box of 100 is a good 30-40 lbs. 140-ish movies is at least that, and 15 boxes total makes for a good Noon Monday workout.

These boxes normally used for shipping bananas came from 2 hours out of my city, and the person who sold them to me online said many came from a video rental store. I’d asked what kinds of movies I could expect and they sent me a few snapshots. From there, my Pre-Purchase Rationalization began.

I’ve spent the last 20 years finding interesting things in thrift stores and garage sales, paying on average about $1.00 per item – records, movies, books, etc. Over the past 5 years I’ve grabbed opportunities to buy bulk lots online. Within this I apply my Thrift Store Rule of Thumb: as long as the pieces I want average out to no more than $1 each, I feel the money is worth it. The excess is then either an acceptable loss or a means to re-sell and get my investment back.

Some historical context: I grew up in the 80’s and 90’s, watching a lot of stuff on VHS. It’s a format that aesthetically holds a place in my heart, and I’ve collected select tapes here and there over the years. And much like with vinyl records, an advantage to digging up an original medium like this is that, contrary to popular belief, not everything is on the Big Bad Internet.

As with music, my viewing tastes vary. Action, Comedy, Horror, Skateboarding – I’m open to all genres, from any era. Growing up watching the parody show Mystery Science Theatre 3000 also informed my tastes. The show featured a guy flanked by two puppeteered robots cracking jokes at cheesy old movies. Humour aside, as I got older it became apparent just how fascinating some of these flicks were.

Science Fiction and Horror movies were a mainstay on the show, ranging from the 50’s through to the 80’s. Lots of Z-grade films that somehow got green-lit by eager storytellers and naïve producers have since been reflected back upon by many as a mix of ridiculous schlock and unassuming gold. I became one of the nerds who gets a thrill out of finding these magnetic tape gems in dollar bins and yard sales.

As with anything collectable, finding the real gold takes patience. You’ve got to sit at that riverbed with your sifting pan and take a risk on not finding anything more than silt and rocks. But when the strike happens, the thrill is like no other. It’s not simply greed – not every rare item is worth big bucks, and not everyone is looking to re-sell on the collector’s market. It’s as much about finding exciting pieces of treasure, sometimes super-rare, other times deeply personal. If anything it’s a reward for one’s diligence (or at least one’s sore neck, stiff knees and grimy hands).

The seller of the 1,000 tapes did not show me everything available in the boxes – they were selling the whole pile only, and for a fixed price, willing to let a lot go for little. It was up to me to take a risk on my $100 being worth it almost sight-unseen. But to be honest, that was part of the thrill. Assured that the boxes contained a full variety of stuff (and not 50 copies of Winnie the Pooh Playtime: Cowboy Pooh) I began to feel confident. Looking through the snapshots I used the Thrift Store Rule of Thumb and started counting out winners. When I estimated about 50 tapes that I would for sure want, I felt the odds were in my favour that I could find another 50 to help average out the keepers to $1 each.

With excited resolution I decided to take a chance on having enough room in my little car – and basement suite – for 15 banana boxes full of food for my VCR.

Sat in in my living room I set to exploring the boxes one at a time. Each would be like a mystery pack – anything could be in them, adding to the thrill. Slipping the top off of the first box I saw, to small dismay, a lot of open tapes with or without generic cases. I had a theory, and it was quickly confirmed: these were from the Adults Only section of the original video store. I extracted a few non-porno’s, set the remaining box aside (labelled “Oh My!”) and proceeded onward.

Thankfully the other crates were much less… explicit. Here the real fun began, and in more ways than one. Firstly, I’m a little OCD – I like organizing things. Going through these packs of tapes wasn’t going to be as simple as setting aside what I wanted and re-boxing the rest.

No, I was going to enjoy categorizing first and culling the herd second.

The next several hours was akin to browsing stacks in a thrift store, only in the comfort of my own home. I spun records and sorted through tapes that reflected both first-time discovery and nostalgic re-discovery. Kids movies, documentaries, War and Westerns, the odd unlabeled or home-recorded mystery items… I’d definitely gotten a mixed bag. And I couldn’t be more excited.

Bit by bit the thrilling moments came. The Hollywood classics I’d always wanted to see; the obscure horror and sci-fi you don’t find outside of the internet; the personal favourites I hadn’t seen since I was a kid. Even if I only found a few jewels in a single box, it buoyed my emotions against all the excess fodder piling up.

Ultimately I did find more than a few keepers per box. My total winners worked out to 172 tapes, covering a tremendous cross-section of ancient cinema.

There was a great chunk of Comedy, ranging from 1948’s Abbot & Costello Meet Frankenstein to 1999’s Mystery Men; a massive collection of both obscure and classic 70’s, 80’s and 90’s Action, Suspense and Crime flicks; select episodes of The Twilight Zone and The Outer Limits; every 80’s kid’s favourite love-hate-relationship flick, Masters of the Universe; a healthy 10-pack of Godzilla smashers; and of course, a fine array of the 80’s Slasher and Monster rarities that a lot of my fellow VHS freaks freak out over.

The latter is inevitably the most exciting, given their bizarre fascination and subsequent collectability. In short, there aren’t many VHS tapes worth the kind of money that rare Horror movies are ascribed. Part of it is the rarity itself – it doesn’t take much effort or cash to find 2001: A Space Odyssey, or Mad Max, or even The Texas Chainsaw Massacre. But stuff like Dark Night Of The Scarecrow (1981)? Saturn 3 (1980)? Sleepaway Camp III: Teenage Wasteland (1989)? Those are some real Right Place, Right Time, Right Money items. Cash value aside, they can be a thrill to find.

Aside from finding enough tapes to make the money feel worth it, I tried not to expect much. It’s very easy to set yourself up for disappointment in the collector’s market, even if the odd gold strike tends to erase any such negativity. That said, as I went through the boxes I did have some hopes. Obviously I was glad to find a lot of standard movie fare, but I was surprised to not find any – and I mean any – Pro Wrestling tapes. Strangely out of the thousand-or-so-tapes I found next-to-no Sports videos, the only one of note being a Sugar Ray Leonard vs. Roberto Duran III boxing recap.

Some honest perspective: After 6-7 total hours of digging (yes I took breaks) I only ended up keeping roughly 2 of the 15 boxes purchased. Without any context that sounds bad, a waste of time and money. When you break it down, though, it has been a valid risk and a solid investment. I found more than I was expecting, and purchased individually from collectors I could have spent $100 on even just a handful of movies. In turn, if I play my cards right I should be able to make my money back from just one box – ironically the very first, very adult box I opened.

Again, though, this was not the priority. I did not go into this collection as a means to a cash-profitable end. Before anything I’m a movie lover, and I prefer older ones via older technology. I want to see films I haven’t seen in forever; I want to re-live youthful memories; I want to experience flicks so poorly made as to be both laughable and laudable.

In the end I want to have fun watching these movies before their tape and my bones deteriorate all too soon.

© 2019 Andrew Hall Writes

Here’s some snapshots of (almost) all my favourite finds, plus some random extra shots…