Gregg Doyel

gregg.doyel@indystar.com

Pat McAfee is listening, and he’s biting his nails. He can’t believe he’s here, and he can’t believe they’re here, and at this moment the Colts punter can’t believe what he’s discussing — his debut with the Harlem Globetrotters. So maybe he’s a little nervous.

The Globetrotters’ showman, Ant Atkinson, is going over the skit with McAfee. We’re sitting in a dressing room Monday at Bankers Life Fieldhouse. It’s 15 minutes before tipoff of the Globetrotters’ annual appearance in Indianapolis on Martin Luther King Jr. Day, and now Atkinson — please, call him Ant — is telling McAfee about the third quarter.

“It’s your time,” Ant says, “when you hear me call for the audible.”

McAfee doesn’t know exactly what that means, but he plays it cool.

“Got it,” he says. Pause. “What next?”

Here, Ant brings up the play. You know, the one in October against New England. The fake punt. Remember? Don’t ask me how it’s so clear, but this literally is all Ant says, and combined with a sympathetic wince on his face, it’s enough:

“Here’s the funny part,” Ant says, then winces. “Remember when y’all …”

“Yeah,” McAfee says.

“We’re going to do that.”

Ant and his teammate, Herbert “Flight Time” Lang, explode in laughter. McAfee chuckles politely, and then Ant tells McAfee what will happen next. McAfee is listening. He’s biting his nails. The two Globetrotters leave the dressing room, and now it’s just McAfee, his friend Andy Stayer, and me. I ask McAfee: Do you know what you’re about to do?

“Not a clue,” he says. He’s not biting his nails anymore. Now he’s smiling.

* * *

Of all the cities in America, why do the Globetrotters perform every Martin Luther King Day right here in Indianapolis? Not a clue. That’s what various Globetrotters and even their coach, a former player named Barry “Hi Rise” Hardy, tell me.

“I don’t have the correct answer,” Hardy says, “but I’m happy to be here on MLK Day. We do play here every single year, which is awesome. We just come here and take care of business just like what Dr. King did. He stood for things, and we’re doing the same, and we’re going to carry on his legacy as well as carrying on our legacy, our 90-year history.”

Things change over 90 years. Once upon a time, the Globetrotters were the biggest basketball outfit in the world. You have to go back 60 or more years, but some of the best players ever — Wilt Chamberlain and Connie Hawkins, to name two — have worn the Globetrotters’ red, white and blue. In those days, Crispus Attucks High gave the Globetrotters a steady stream of talent, starting with Oscar Robertson’s older brother, Bailey. Then it was the unspeakably good Willie Gardner and his high school classmate, Cleveland Harp. Then Hallie Bryant.

Harp, now 81, was at Bankers Life Fieldhouse on Monday. He’s at the Fieldhouse more than 50 times a year, working as an usher for Pacers games and other events, but once a year he comes to the building not for business, but pleasure. He visits with the Globetrotters’ coach, Hardy, before the game. He watches from courtside.

“It’s showbiz,” Harp tells me. “That never changes.”

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Some things do. In 1985 the Globetrotters signed their first female, Lynette Woodward. In 1995 the Globetrotters signed their first player not of African-American descent, Orlando Antigua.

And on Monday, the Globetrotters returned to Indianapolis for Martin Luther King Day and incorporated a white Colts punter into their performance. And that punter, he dropped his pants.

Twice.

OK, three times.

* * *

Back in the dressing room, 15 minutes before tipoff, Ant is asking McAfee if he has a touchdown dance.

“Oh yeah,” McAfee says.

Ant: “Do it.”

McAfee: “I’ve been planning this for 28 years.”

The 28-year-old McAfee drops his jeans and reveals something short, too short, made of blue fabric. It has white stars. Is that … underwear?

“They’re shorts,” he sneers. “And Larry Bird socks.”

Sure enough, his socks — pulled up to his knees — have images of Larry Bird shooting jumpers. Ant Atkinson has no idea if the skit will work, but he’s seen enough. He knows Pat McAfee will work.

“Oh yeah,” Ant says.

Now the coach has come into this dressing room. He asks McAfee if he’s ready.

“I’m going to take my pants off,” McAfee says.

Hardy: “OK.”

“I’ve got these shorts on,” McAfee says, and drops his pants for the second time.

They discuss the big finish to the skit: After faking a field-goal kick and going long for a pass, McAfee is supposed to punt the ball to Ant, sitting on 7-4 teammate Stretch Middleton’s shoulders, for a dunk.

“Can you do that?” Ant asks McAfee.

“Please,” the Colts punter says. “I’m a professional.”

Now the other Globetrotter in the room, “Flight Time” Lang, has an idea.

“We should try to kick a field goal into the hoop,” Flight Time muses. “Are you that good?”

“No chance,” McAfee says. “But I’ve seen you guys do the Steph Curry shots. That’s crazy.”

Flight Time says, “We hit from 35 feet.”

“It’s incredible you guys make that,” McAfee says.

Now Stayer speaks up.

“Pat,” he says, “they’re the Harlem Globetrotters.”

More laughter. Nervous, it sounds to me. McAfee is biting his nails again. The game is about to start.

* * *

Everything goes according to plan. Of course it does; they’re the Harlem Globetrotters. They’ve been doing this for 90 years, with more than 20,000 games on 122 countries and six continents. The bucket of water into the crowd, then the second bucket — confetti, this time. The purse borrowed from the woman in the front row. The dancing. More dancing.

Sweet Georgia Brown and the magic circle. The incompetent referee serving as the butt of most jokes. The Globetrotters do what they do, and the crowd of roughly 8,000 laughed for more than hour Monday.

And then Ant yelled, “Audible!”

Here comes McAfee, wearing his own Globetrotters jersey — “Boomstick,” it says, below the No. 1 — onto the court for a fake field goal. That comes after the Globtrotters line up four players wide to the right. Ant is over the ball.

Ant is Griff Whalen.

The crowd knows exactly what it’s looking at. And laughs. It sees McAfee. And roars.

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Now comes the McAfee fake, the pass, the touchdown. He pulls down his pants, reveals his shorts, gets laughs. Then he dances. There’s a moonwalk in there, and then Ant makes a demand:

“Rewind!”

Everyone moves backward. McAfee is moonwalking backward, climbing back into his pants, jogging backward to the spot of the fake, kicking backward, all of it. The gag ends soon, with the Globetrotters and the Colts punter dancing some more and the crowd loving it and me remembering what McAfee had told me in the dressing room before the game:

“The fact that the Harlem Globetrotters chose to do their show in Indianapolis on Martin Luther King Jr. Day is such an incredible honor for our city,” he says. “When I got a text message that said, ‘Hey, do you want to perform with the Harlem Globetrotters on Martin Luther King Jr. Day?’

“Uh, I couldn’t say ‘yes’ fast enough.”

Well, sure. They’re the Harlem Globetrotters.

Find IndyStar columnist Gregg Doyel on Twitter at@GreggDoyelStar or atwww.facebook.com/gregg.doyel