Release: Friday, February 12, 2016

[Theater]

Written by: Rhett Reese; Paul Wernick

Directed by: Tim Miller

I hope someone is going to pay for it, because that fourth wall is destroyed. And I know Ryan Reynolds ain’t gonna put up the money, even if he is about to make millions upon millions with this future franchise.

STOP! READERS! HI, HELLO — THIS IS RYAN REYNOLDS AND I AM TAKING OVER THIS BLOG. I REPEAT. DO NOT . . . oh, fuck you caps-lock. Anyway, don’t listen to . . . er, well, I guess read . . . a word this cream-puff so-called ‘critic’ says about the Deadpool movie! He’s going to try to sell us (me) short, go see the movie for yourselves. You have a choice here, people — do not become passive, put in your place! Break out!

Ryan, I never said I was trying to talk them out of seeing the movie.

SHUT UP TOM!

Alright. Well, what I was going to say. . .

I SAID SHUSH, YOU MUPPET! . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . OK, so what were you trying to say about Deadpool? I’m sorry, this wasn’t . . . you know, like this wasn’t meant to be a hostile takeover, nothing permanent or anything — I just wanted to prove that there was in fact, another domain I could go into and try to be more meta with this movie. FIFTH WALL BROKEN!

See, I’m already confused. Who’s now talking?

You are, Tom. Well, you were in italics before, so . . . I mean, this is me. I’m regular font.

Yeah, you’re right I just forgot to italicize that last line. Well, still.

You’re welcome! Your blog is yours again. K thanks for the promo and everything! . . . . . . . . (p.s., Julie — call me 😉 )

Oh, really? I can have my blog back now? [Ponders how to translate unenthusiastic sarcasm through typing.]

*

Alas, this is what you pay to see in the much-anticipated and appropriately-rated comic adaptation for the snark-and- sex sass Wade Wilson/Pool of Deadness — the over-the-top meta humor. 21 and 22 Jump Streets have nothing on this. Not even The LEGO Movie got the audience to feel like such an active participant in the events.

Deadpool is so relentlessly self-aware and rather clever it’s easy to forget how generic the story is. When we’re not kebab-ing the bad guys we’re fumbling hopelessly for dramatic realism — I’m not feeling the multiple-organ-cancer as an excuse for him to undergo this radical ‘transformation’ bit — it’s delivered ably enough but there’s very little original about this origins story. However if you’re of the sort who like films with as many ridiculously well-written, well-thought-out-but-even-more-expertly-articulated-and-delivered jokes packed into a single frame as possible, Deadpool is probably going to bring you to your knees.

Recommendation: Ryan Reynolds cranks up the snark to 15 debuting the red-and-black form-fitting man suit. Its merits far outweigh the weaknesses, of which there are several, and there’s enough commitment from the rest of the cast to ground the film somewhat in its slower moments. I’m also still trying to decide if it definitively benefitting from the R rating makes the content stronger or weaker. How would this have worked if it were packaged as a Marvel-friendly PG-13?

Rated: R

Running Time: 108 mins.

Quoted: “Crime’s the disease, meet the cure. Okay, not the cure, but more like a topical ointment to reduce the swelling and itch. Hi, Tom!”

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Photo credits: http://www.impawards.com; http://www.imdb.com