

For people who are unfamiliar with this, there is a kind of community out there, with books and web forums, where guys share techniques for "seducing" women.



After noticing some pretty odd behavior from guys I'd meet or talk to online, I read a bit about it. It's usually pretty blatant when a guy is using these techniques, and it is to the point where I can often predict exactly what he will do next.



Many of these techniques are benign. However, there is one called "negging." A "neg" is essentially a back-handed compliment. The purpose of negging is to "reduce a woman's social value" in order to "penetrate her bitch shield" and "bring her social perception more in line with reality." Essentially, to knock down her self esteem a bit so she's more open to the guy.



I find this gross and appalling. Anyone who would try to damage my self esteem to manipulate me in some way is someone I wouldn't even want to know. What sucks is that I usually *like* the guy a lot already *before* he pulls this negging and the other game playing. Then once he does it all my interest shrivels down to zero.



I usually just end the conversation and stop interacting with the guy once he starts doing something like this. I always want to tell him, "you know, I really really liked you until you made those backhanded comments to me." But I don't. Should I?



If it matters, I'm in my early 20s, and the guys who do this range from my age to early 30s. This happens much more with guys I've met online than guys I meet in real life.



As an example of the type of thing they say, two recent ones from two different guys were, "Out of all the desperate women on here, you might be the cutest desperate woman;" or, after I told him about my favorite book, "that book's pretty silly, it's a good thing you're cute."



It's stuff that by itself isn't that bad, but when a guy makes 3 of these sorts of comments in a row, and guy after guy has pulled this sort of thing in an almost rote pattern, I just don't want to stick around for more of it.

Should I say something when I notice a guy using "Pick-up Artist" techniques on me?