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"So you see where this is going," Evi said. "If someone with enough money and power wanted to convince the world that two decent human beings were insane, you know they could do it with just a little bit of Howard Hughes-ing. With the speed at which information travels, it only takes one or two fabricated stories to convince the whole world that we're crazy. Hell, most people only read headlines. A few 'Randy Quaid Did Some Weird Shit' headlines might be all you need."

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"But wait," I said, my skepticism renewed. "Why would anyone even need to discredit you?"

"To render us defenseless," Quaid said in mid-barrel throw. "They know that, if the world thinks we're crazy, no one will come to our aid if, say, a mysterious cabal threatens to murder us. First they convinced America we were unstable, then they threatened us, and now our own country won't help us."

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"The only way it'll stop," Evi said tearfully, "is if we pay them an absurd amount of money. Or... or they'll kill us and collect all of Randy's royalties from the Actor's Equity Association. Either way, they get their money and our reputation gets destroyed."

"Damn," I said, genuinely impressed. "It's the perfect plan. It's like crippling a guy right before a boxing match. But then also the guy has to give you all his money. Alright, I believe you. You guys convinced me of your innocence."