(see the bottom for an update)

(See even more to the bottom for a second update!)

Me!

I’m actually typing this before the completion of the Reddit exchange because, honestly, my head is in a spin. It’s been a wild ride from start to finish and as I start typing this, I have no idea where it’s going to end.

Let me tell you how it started. There’s no TL;DR version so you’re going to have to keep going to the end. You made it through seven Harry Potter books and this isn’t nearly so long. I believe in your ability to keep reading.

Okay, so my Santa was pretty quick about getting my information and dropping me a message. In fact, over the course of this exchange they’ve sent me a number of cryptic messages and they’ve all turned into something AWESOME so far. So that was certainly a good sign.

The first was asking if there was a weekend I’d be free, and if I’d have a friend who could go with me to an event. No promises, Santa had said, it was just a maybe. Well, I do have friends (whether they like it or not they’re stuck with me), so I replied that I did, and that my lacking social life meant I was fantastically free most weekends.

Next, my first gift (yes, FIRST) was shipped! Also, what was my opinion on Lego and action figures. I’m nearly 30 and desperately clinging to my youth, of course I like Lego! Who doesn’t like Lego? Sick people, that’s who doesn’t like Lego. Anyway, yes. Such yes, Santa. All of the yes.

What’s your opinion of banter?

Santa, I’m British, we all love banter. Banter is what our country was built on. Banter and the taking over of other countries with the ingenious use of flags.

Technically, Santa’s first gift to me was making me smile like such an idiot that no one sat next to me on the bus home from work that night. Trust me, after eight hours that is the best gift anyone could get. The gift of being so happy that I looked truly insane and frightening to strangers. Bless you, Santa.

So, naturally, I thank Santa profusely and am quite outrageously excited. So much so that I have been a constant annoyance to all my colleagues since this began, although some are so excited for me that they have been bothering me at my desk asking if Santa has contacted me about more surprises. I WILL TELL YOU WHY IN A MOMENT!

DAY ONE!

First gift is due to arrive! Santa says it’s because I said I liked Oliver Wood. I did have my fingers crossed for it being Oliver Wood, but Santa could only send me one of his balls. A golden snitch, to be precise. A wonderful golden snitch that I fully intend to throw around and catch (and maybe throw at someone but we never know do we I mean these things are magic and accidents happen and shhh). THANKS SANTA! A girl can never have too many shiny projectiles!

DAY TWO!

The penguins still have no idea that I’m not one of them and – wait no that’s not – ANYWAY…

Ah, yes, day two.

THE LEGO!

I said that the Weasley twins were two of my favourite characters. I don’t know if it was the jokes, the rampage through the castle, the inventive genius, or all those wonderful puns, but something about those twins just makes me smile. Except when Fred died. That didn’t make me smile. Why, Jo? WHY?!

They’re not just any little Lego figures, but special little mini figures! I don’t have a lot of Lego, but I do have a little Bilbo Baggins and a Gollum. I put Fred and George with them and made the mistake of leaving them unattended. When I returned it was chaos. The twins had created duplicates of The One Ring but all the fakes would explode in clouds of black smoke when touched. Gollum was caught between joyful cries of ‘PRECIOUS!’ and ‘FILTHY WEASLEYSES! WE HATES THEM!’. Fred and George did appear to be enjoying themselves, though!

DAY THREE!

Santa asked me if I liked art. I do. I love art. I am an artist (sort of). I’m a plush artist but I can doodle sometimes. Sometimes I can paint wonderful watercolours, and other times I struggle with drawing anything that doesn’t look like a potato. My artistic muse is sporadic and flighty, and likes to take long holidays whenever I feel I might need it.

I digress.

Yes, I love art!

AND I LOVE MY PRESENTS!

The banter question became clear when I got gifts from my Secret Not-Santa and my Secret Unhatted-Santa (by the way, Santa, my friend thinks these are clues as to who you are and has turned into Sherlock this week. I place the blame for that squarely on you.). The book of Harry Potter insults is great. I told my cat that she’s the reason mandrakes cry, and another friend that their face should be the fourth unforgiveable curse. They glared. A lot. I fear for my life. Send help.

THE ART OH MY GOD ALL OF THE ART THERE’S ART EVERYWHERE IT’S ON THE WALLS AND THE CEILING AND IN MY SHOES BUT MOSTLY IT’S IN THIS GORGEOUS BOOK!

I got the illustrated Philosopher’s Stone (Sorcerer’s stone to you fans in the states) and it’s BEAUTIFUL! This almost got lifted by my colleagues. I took it in to show one of them and then I ended up with an audience. It’s nice to know we’re all grown ups at the office. But wow, it’s stunning. I thought it was just an art book at first (which would still be fantastic) but it’s the entire novel, hardback, with a cute ribbon bookmark through so I can keep my place. The paintings are out of this world, I mean the detail! The burrow! I love it so much, I can’t wait to re-read the first book with such stunning illustrations!

DAY FOUR!

I had to go back to work which meant I wasn’t home when the next gift arrived. A neighbour signed for it and it had to escape from Flatzkaban to get to my front door. Yes, you guessed! SIRIUS BLACK! I should explain (as I think I did in my details) that I love Gary Oldman. I would probably marry him if he asked (give it time, he will)… (sorry to my boyfriend if he’s reading this)… So, when Azkaban came out in the cinema I was in a bit of a reading and writing slump. I’d not read any Harry Potter books by that point (book five was out and book six was a month or two away), but my then boyfriend wanted to see the movie. I only agreed because Gary Oldman would be in it.

I was hooked.

I devoured those books (not literally because that’s a lot of fibre) in that summer, reading them over and over until book six came out. I had to wait a long painful year for book seven (which I got at midnight dressed as Bellatrix and sobbed all over after all the horrible countless deaths which only tea could save me from) – (WHY DOBBY, WHY?!), but I was so in love with reading again that it was just – I can’t even describe it – it was like I rediscovered a part of myself. I started writing again and now I’m a self published author of six novels. I owe a lot to Harry Potter, and I wouldn’t have known just how much if Gary Oldman hadn’t been cast as Sirius Black.

So when I got a Sirius Black funko pop from my Santa I knew he understood just how much that character and the story meant to me. I am still in love with Gary Oldman, and I love Sirius even if he was killed by drapery, and I especially love my adorable little funko!

DAY FIVE!

Are you still with me? Awesome.

Okay so we’re at the point of me writing this (duh). As in, I started to document this on day five. Anything that happens after this point is a mystery to me as I write this. I am aware that there’s one more item in the mail to me, and that there are a couple more emails with things on due to come through. With that in mind, I will tell you about day five.

I hadn’t realised just how much Harry Potter stuff was going on in London. I know it’s the setting for a lot of the story, and I only live an hour or so out of the city by train, but it really wasn’t something I’d looked into before.

HOLY WOW!

A Harry Potter Text Tour!! So I get to go with three friends on a walking tour around London but it’s interactive with clues and things and we have to find Harry and stop Voldemort from destroying the world! Uh – HELL YES! I’m trying to gather up a crew as I’m writing this so we can go and defend the world from Lord Voldemort. Chill, guys. We got this.

DAY SIX!

So this is actually the last day of the exchange and I’ve had my final gifts, so I wanted to go back and document the last few as they came for you.

ESCAPE GAMES!

Okay, so I’m actually claustrophobic so when Santa asked my opinion on these games, I was upfront about that, and he awesomely did so much research to find out if it would be okay for me to participate in a game like this. Fortunately, the company said it would be totally fine, so I’M GOING ON A HARRY POTTER THEMED ESCAPE ROOM EVENT IN LONDON! Like for serious, this is really cool. My boyfriend who isn’t even into Harry Potter wants to go, and my friend who hates London for the most part wants to go, that is how awesome this is! We’re planning a trip in September because that’s when it’s my birthday (30, eek!), so I might just choose never to leave because then I don’t have to grow up.

That’s how it works, right?

DAY SEVEN!

I freaked out when I got this gift. I was at work and I ran across the office to tackle my friend and invite her to go with me. My boss wasn’t happy, but I was, so I didn’t care.

THE HARRY POTTER STUDIO TOUR!

I’m actually going on the studio tour! I’ve never been, a lot of my friends have and they like to remind me that I haven’t had the chance to go, and now I can! It’s on the 1st of October which is the weekend after my birthday, which will make me feel a lot better about turning thirty!

THE FREAKING STUDIO TOUR CAN YOU BELIEVE IT!

IT DOESN’T GET BETTER THAN THIS!

(or does it?)

DAY EIGHT!

As if there could be anything to top the gift from the day before, the final day really blew my mind.

Ready?

Sitting down?

I actually got two presents today so I’ll kill you with some more suspense. I got a gorgeous little Hungarian Horntail plushie. He’s the cutest thing. My cat didn’t agree and she promptly killed him. I told her that she’s the reason mandrakes scream. She looks like she’s holding it together in the pictures, but inside she’s emotionally devastated and psychologically ruined because of this outstanding insult.

Okay, so the final FINAL gift is…

A TICKET TO SEE THE CURSED CHILD IN NOVEMBER!

There were literally no words.

None.

I think I’m hated by all my friends who couldn’t get tickets, and I’m way too happy to care.

Santa you are incredible. I mean, there isn’t enough good karma in the world to repay you for all these incredible gifts. I’m so blown away by your generosity to a total stranger that I can barely wrap my head around it all! There aren’t words strong enough to thank you for all of this. You know from all our messages back and forth that this last week has been a wild ride of me fangirling about literally everything you’ve done, and I still don’t think that’s enough to express my gratitude.

You are the absolute best! I love you, thank you so, so much for making this the best week ever, and for making sure that my birthday this year will be totally unforgettable!

UPDATE BELOW

DAY NINE!

I'm starting to feel like I should add 'in the Big Brother house' to this because I'm sure my Santa is watching me.

A HOGWARTS TRUNK!

I've always wanted a Hogwarts school trunk and now I have one! It's perfect for storing all my gifts in (and for packing all my stuff into for when I move into the studio tour at WB which I'm sure they won't mind).

The reason I think Santa might be watching me is that I have a six year old brother who has just started reading Harry Potter and he loves it! This trunk came with an outfit that is the perfect size for him, and he'll even get his own wand! I just hope he doesn't put any hexes on me.

Maybe I should wait until he gets his Hogwarts letter?

Nah.

THANK YOU, SANTA!

What an epic finale to this amazing ride!

UPDATE TWO!

Santa dropped me a line after I said I would pass on the Hogwarts robes to my little brother. Santa clearly has some powers because he didn't realise I had a little brother who was just getting into the books, and wanted to send something for him, too!

Tom's only six but he really loves the Harry Potter world. He's seen most of the movies (some are a little dark for him just yet), and is as much a fan as I am.

He loved his Hogwarts letter! And his Marauders Map. He said he'll get into lots of trouble at Hogwarts with that when he goes. He's been practicing his magic spells already (and hitting our dad with the wand which is something I will always condone and support).

Thank you again, Santa! You really made his day, he's an incredibly lucky and happy little boy!