WASHINGTON D.C. — In a bold and short statement that has since been overshadowed by Trump bombing Afghanistan, the White House is proposing a compromise between keeping the border secure, and allowing a select few of talented individuals come into the country.

The compromise would be to build, instead of one 30-40 foot wall, to build several 5 foot walls that would need to be jumped over in order to gain entry to the US. This, the statement says, would encourage athletic Mexicans to vault over the walls, while discouraging less desirable ones from coming into the country.

The initial plan of one big beautiful wall was too exclusive, as it would have kept everyone out, but this new proposal relieves strain on the immigration system, while also giving us the competitive edge on the world stage that immigration can give a country.

Specifically, the statement mentions, “the US has a bad track record in athletic events like soccer, while Mexico has had a fairly average one. Not great, but average.” It goes on to propose bringing in Mexican immigrants to boost the US agriculture, lawn care, and auto body work industries.

The proposal is one both sides are coming together on, as both sides agree that the country could benefit from high skilled Immigrants.

The Democrats have yet to see that Trump is essentially proposing the same amount of wall to be built, but that this new one will be spread out over several walls, and to call him on it, as would be expected. As with the Gorsich nomination, Democrats are kinda just taking what they can get. Democratic strategist and APR’s Compromise Correspondent tells us that this is the best thing the Democrats can do.

“The Republicans have full control so the Democrats are left with the choices of a 35 foot wall, or 7 five foot walls. Both aren’t prime, but it’s best to bite the bullet, buy a team USA soccer jersey, and let it happen”

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