Six people have been hospitalised for poisoning in New York city after trap pioneer DJ Carnage farted in the elevator of an upmarket apartment block.

The six victims were rushed to the Lower Manhattan Hospital for treatment where they are said to be in a stable but uncomfortable condition.

“I’ve never witnessed anything like that in my life,“ claimed paramedic Peter Greaves. “I’ve been a first responder for over thirty years and I’ve been to some pretty grisly scenes but this was a cut above the rest. I literally had to burn my uniform to get rid of that stink. How a man could produce something so vile is beyond me.”

According to one witness, the victims were having difficulty breathing, “vomiting violently” and “almost completely blinded” by the thick noxious gas.

“I was standing in the lobby waiting for the elevator when I got the smell,” claimed the eyewitness. “At first I thought some kids had let of a stink bomb but as the elevator got closer and the smell got worse I knew it was something a lot more serious.”





“It burned the eyes and the skin and you could feel it in the back of your throat like Tabasco sauce only much worse,” continued the witness. “When the elevator doors opened it was like being smacked in the face with a red hot shovel covered in habanero chillies. The people who were inside spilled out gasping for air, it was truly horrible.”

Carnage, who has built up an immunity to his own flatulence, was spotted at a nearby Chipolte Mexican Grill, where he has been given a lifetime’s worth of free food, gorging on a variety of burritos, enchiladas and chimichangas moments before the incident.

“My farts are always bad after I’ve had a fill of Chipolte, which is pretty much everyday,” claimed the DJ. “But today they were really bad. You know, farts you can be proud off? I had no business being in that building, I just went in to go up and down in the elevator until there were enough people in there to unleash the beast.”

“I can’t believe those people actually had to go to hospital. That’s so fucking awesome.”

According to building management, four stories of the apartment block have been evacuated and are currently being fumigated. Carnage has also been banned from entering any residential building within a five mile radius of any Chipolte branch.