In your life you have already discovered your inner self, your reason for being and what makes you who you are, but telling others this secret is scary and often very hard. When coming out you have so many outcomes that can be damning and then you have the few that are outstanding. The hardest thing is to determine who will be one of the two because you are afraid of being hated, scared, and alone. It can be the best thing in your life or the worst thing, but that is not always your decision, because you don’t know how others are going to react.

When you are considering those options it doesn’t matter if you are Bi-sexual, lesbian, gay, or Transgender; the situation always ends up feeling the same way. You feel like you have no one to come to, there nowhere you can go to be yourself, and you feel trapped inside without the ability to express yourself to people. This is a huge factor in your feelings and decisions because you don’t know who you can trust. Sometimes you feel that even your closest friend might not like you anymore for who you are, also, your family may feel completely different about you. What are you going to do? How are you going to explain this to people? These are all good questions and vary greatly but I will break it down the best I can.

Bi-sexual, Lesbian and Gay

If you are Bi, Lesbian or Gay, coming out is going to be difficult around friends and family, but it is not as bad as you would think. Surprisingly, being part of the LGBT is not as bad in some areas as they are in others. Granted, only about 6% of the population in the USA identify as LGBT compared to the mass number of people living there. However, coming out is still very difficult for your friends and family. Personally, I recommend that if you are up in decision about coming out and are not sure to start asking general questions on the topic. Try to get an idea of what they may think of someone who is against or supportive of LGBT. You could ask questions like, Hey, did you know “Actor” was gay, and what do you think about that? Or I heard the news talking about the LGBT community in “city” and was wondering what your opinion on that is? Of course, there are many other options that you can do to make this approach. Once you have a general idea of whether or not they have accepted to LGBT or not then you can have a stronger idea on if you want to tell them.

Trans-people

Our situation is a little different, and I only say that because unlike being LGB as a trans-person you will begin your transition in your life which is actively visible to everyone around you as you go through your 1–2 years of change and if you are LGB you will only draw attention to people who know. However, when you are reading to come up as a trans-woman/man than you will have to explain a lot to people around you and while people are seeing more and more about transgender people it is not as common. The fear of coming out though is no different than LGB, and you have to go through the same steps of asking as I mentioned above to get an idea of how people are going to react. The best thing is to take it slow and start slowly with people you know before displaying your change to the world. You can make it through if you take it one step at a time because that’s what I did.

Overall

Coming out is a difficult thing for anyone regardless of gender preference or identity. You are always going to find those people who hate it and those who support it. There are a lot of support groups out there that can give you advice and help guide you and be your friend even if no one else will. You are not alone in your fight to be yourself, so don’t let someone keep you from being who you are inside. The fear is real and we all experience it, and I know I still do but if you want to live happily to yourself, you have to be who you are. Not everyone will be with you, and I know family can be the hardest to lose, but either they accept it or you move on to people who will.

There are always people who will love you, so be happy and be yourself.