A few years ago, I was riding the city bus home from work. I’d just gotten fired because of my inability to put on a plastic smile and exude constant rays of sunshine, but the only reason that has anything to do with my story is because it put me in a teary mood.

I weighed about 270 pounds, then. Maybe 280.

When I heard the words “I’m going to have to let you go”, I heard “You’re worthless” instead.

On the bus, I minded my own business. I was just trying to keep myself together long enough to get home, so I didn’t break down in tears and cause an embarrassing scene on the bus.

An older guy, whose face will forever be etched into my memory, sat in the seat in front of mine. He wore a dirty-looking faded blue jacket and jeans, a battered white hat, and aviator-style sunglasses. I remember thinking his teeth looked like they were stained with nicotine.

He turned around to face me, leaned over the back of his seat, and looked me up and down like I was not worth the dirt on the underside of his shoe.

He said: “Fat pig, eh?”, and grunted like one.

I moved seats a few times, and so did he. He kept saying “Fat pig, piggy, piggy. Fat pig, eh?”

People heard him, but nobody said anything.

After all, people these days don’t want to get involved.

I tried my best not to engage him, since I was barely keeping it together anyway. On my way off the bus, I told the driver about him, but the guy got off the bus too. Before he went on his way, he passed by me and said just loud enough for only me to hear: “The fat c*nt told the bus driver, eh? Fat pig.”

That incident has stuck with me, and it’s been at least 8 years.

Every day, I see and hear people fat-shaming others the same way that I have been fat-shamed many times.

Recently, I read an article that was essentially one woman’s response to a series of tweets she came across– tweets about how women over 200lbs should never wear leggings, or crop tops, or pretty much whatever clothing they wanted that might be construed as being “for” a skinnier person to wear.

I am over 200lbs. I weigh 230, now. I wear leggings. I wear clothes that, by their standards, I “shouldn’t wear”. They are comfortable, and they make me feel good about myself.

Part of me says that people who fat-shame are just insecure about how other people judge them. They pass the buck, as it were.

Maybe that’s true, but maybe it isn’t. Maybe, these people are just mean-spirited.

If that’s the case, there are things they are not considering.

What if their fat-shaming victim has a medical condition that leads to a problem with weight?

What if they have an eating disorder, or another psychological disorder that they just can’t seem to be rid of?

What if they are in the process of losing weight, but they just aren’t at their goal yet? Should that stop them from wearing certain clothes if they feel good about themselves?

The answer to that is, and always should be: HELL NO.

Maybe, just maybe, there is nothing the matter with them, and they like who they are, just the way they are.

The fact is, no-one ever knows what’s going on in another person’s body and mind… and that ignorance does not give anyone the right to shame another.