I recently did a photoshoot for a site called Me in My Place. If you’re unfamiliar with the site, here’s a blurb:

Real women in their own place. Not too crazy and just a pinch of naughty…

By creating evocative and alluring portraits of women with body types that have traditionally been left out of mainstream media, Me In My Place is redefining a genre that has been over-run with unrealistic expectations of what it means to be beautiful.

Started as a side project by an established New York City photographer, the site quickly took off and now has a life all it’s own, with several different women running the tumblr, social media, and providing photography for the site. One of the greatest achievements of the project has been the ability to empower women to control the conversation about sex appeal and body confidence.

This site is basically beautiful and tasteful photographs of women of all shapes and sizes chilling in their homes —— NAKED. Or half-naked. Or a bra and underwear. The photos are lightly retouched, if at all (judging by my own shoot, I’m not sure there was much photoshopping). I dig that.

I’m going to share a secret with you: I love all bodies. I truly believe all bodies to be magnificent. Our bodies are the capsules of our spirit, heart, and breath. They are the very thing that holds us together, which is why I believe nobody should ever be ashamed of the skin they live in or the amount of space their bodies do or do not fill in the universe. I’m going to let you in on another secret: I love all bodies, but sometimes I have a really hard time loving my own.

From the moment we’re born, we are labelled. Boy or girl. Smart or stupid. Pretty or ugly. Labels force us to be who everyone else wants us to be instead of allowing us to be who we actually are. For example, labelling a person’s physical differences as “flaws” limits them to a personal preference. To define a something as a flaw is to deem it as an imperfection. Since nobody’s perfect, then how the FUCK does anyone have the audacity to call someone “ugly”? Sadly, we do, and I’ve done it to myself many, many times.

There is not one inch of my body that I haven’t loathed at some point in my life. Self-hatred is worse than an internet troll. An internet troll is a stranger who calls negative attention to the parts of yourself that you despise. Self-hatred believes every word of it. I suffer from anxiety, which sometimes leads to bouts of intense depression. If you’ve ever had depression you know exactly what it’s like to not want to live on this earth. You probably also know what it’s like to feel the need to punish yourself for every little thing you say or do. That mixture of mental illness, insecurity, and the gross things people have said to me over the internet, has caused me to do some horrible things to my body over the years. Things I refuse to do to myself now. My sense of humor, my intelligence, and my body are scrutinized on a daily basis whether I’m fully clothed or not. Even though I may not love it most of the time, I’m not shy about my body and I’m certainly not shy about my sexuality. Which leads me back to why I did this photo shoot. People will question my need to take off my clothes on the internet.

EMPOWERMENT is a word that gets thrown around a lot these days, but as someone who struggles with her own body image, putting my semi-naked body on the internet feels pretty damn empowering. I actually have no excuse not to accept myself now. This is me putting myself out there by saying “this is what I look like. My image is not going to change, no matter how many times you tell me to alter it or how many times I decide to actually alter it.”

My self-esteem has had terrible days, and that doesn’t just go away over night, but lately, I’ve been loving myself a whole lot. When I look at these photos, I see a sexy woman who is confident in both her body and her sexuality. That was exactly how I felt when I took the pictures, and that’s how I feel when I look at them. I hope you see that too. You can say whatever you want about me and my body, but I probably won’t read it. I didn’t do this for you, I did it for me. I trusted a photographer to capture my body in a way that would make me take a step back from my own self-doubt, and he did just that. I love the way I look in these photos. I love that my scars, freckles, tiny butt, and everything else society would deem as “flaws” are on full display. I’m proud of these pictures, and I’m proud to be included on a site that features a bunch of other unapologetic, sexy, talented women who appear to be unashamed of their bodies. Plus, they let me pose with diarrhea on my butt in some of the pics, which is a huge win for me!

Phew! Feels good to get that all off my chest. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m gonna continue living my life and no longer giving a fuck. Byeeee.

Here’s a link to those photos: mimp.findrow.com