340 DMT Trip Reports

Reports which attest to contact with

apparently independently-existing intelligent entities

within what seems to be an alternate reality Compiled by Peter Meyer

This is a compilation of reports of using N,N-dimethyltryptamine (DMT), usually by smoking, mostly derived from a compilation by a person named "Pup" which was posted in 2005-2006 to the dmt.tribe.net website as DMT trip accounts. Pup did not identify the sources of these reports, and they remain anonymous, providing raw observational data for reflection upon what the use of DMT reveals to us. If you recognize your words here then you can be proud of helping to bring to public awareness the discovery of an alternate reality and a new science.

A report is marked "entities" if it mentions experience of one or more apparently independently-existing beings which interact in an apparently intelligent and intentional way with the observer. 226 reports are so marked. Thus 66% of these reports (two out of every three) mention these entities, often with detailed descriptions, thus providing confirmation of their existence. They are often seen 'at work', sometimes in maintaining reality — either 'our reality' or the reality experienced by a person in daily life. The entities are in some ways very human, and express apparently human emotions, but they can be (and usually are) totally bizarre.

These reports are extremely diverse, but almost all of them mention amazing colors, mind-boggling fractal patterns and so on. Apparently anything is possible, and many trippers report being shocked, dumbfounded, astonished and totally unable to understand the experience. Fear and terror are often felt, but often also joy, sometimes during the same trip. It is common for a person to feel that they have died, and some even 'know' that they have died, lending credence to the hypothesis (advanced already over 17 years ago in DMT and the Death State) that the form of consciousness accessed via DMT is what we wake up into when we die (thus suggesting that our physical embodiment is a kind of sleep and that our external-sensory experience is a kind of collective dream). Frequently trippers remember having been there before (perhaps before being born into their present physical existence?). Many people report that the experience is life-changing, and that they will never be the same. For many the experience is an epiphany too profound to be expressible adequately using ordinary language.

Myriad typos and spelling and grammatical errors in these reports have been corrected so as not to distract the reader's attention from what is being said. There is too much here to read in one sitting. It is suggested to read ten reports each day, think about them, and at the end of 34 days reflect on what, collectively, they imply for our conception of reality (this is especially recommended for academic philosophers).

In any scientific body of knowledge 'objective' means intersubjectively verifiable (by competent observers). The 226 reports of apparently independently-existing entities in the DMT world confirm that the existence of these entities is intersubjectively verifiable, and thus that they have an objective existence. That is the intention of this compilation, rather than to provide a guide for those who would venture into DMT hyperspace (although it does that too).

Individual reports may be referenced as http://www.serendipity.li/dmt/340_dmt_trip_reports.htm#N where N is the number of the report. This compilation was done by Peter Meyer and published on this Serendipity website on 2010-08-20.

Report #1 — entities

I've since read accounts from McKenna, and Strassman's subjects. I guess my experience was similar, though I didn't perceive myself as being inside a structure — rather, it seemed that the spirits were all around me. Wherever I looked, the swirling patterns transmogrified into these oscillating things which clearly acted independently of my own thoughts. At least that was the overwhelming perception I had. I can't really describe them — they were infinite in their complexity. I can see why people are convinced that they are entities separate from their own minds — it's inconceivable that anyone can imagine such ... I don't know what you'd call them or it.

Anyway, I was there — wherever the hell it was — and all of a sudden each one of my fingers was connected to a spirit. Here's where it gets really strange — there were thousands of them near me now (and millions in the distance — though if I looked at the distant ones, they zoomed up close). So, next thing I know, each hand has thousands of fingers. I had complete control over each one! Like we can move our left index finger, I could control left finger 40,624. It was like I was a conductor — they were dancing and flying around in accordance with what I did with my 'super-hands'. Sound and sight seemed to merge and shift — I was conducting an orchestra of millions.

There was a lot of other stuff too, but I have never been able to recall it. My final memory is being in absolute nothingness, except for one spirit. As I looked at it, it started to oscillate so as I was looking at myself — or what I perceived was myself — I was changing form a thousand times a second. The oscillations became faster — and the spirit wanted to know who it was. It wasn't asked in words, but I knew what the question was — somehow. I said 'I don't know'. This 'conversation' went back and forth at an ever greater speed until, at the same time, we were both saying 'he is you is he is you....'. Then the words converged into 'hue' — literally it was blue. I mean, I became the colour blue. A psychedelic play on words! I was a frequency! Then this spirit rushed up to me from the other side of the galaxy, laughing. He had a present — like a normal box with a blue ribbon, and he said what's your favourite 'hue'? Next thing I knew I'd opened my eyes. The extra freaky element was that I had turned my head around and was looking straight out the window... at, you guessed it, a big clear blue sky!

Report #2 — entities

Around me I felt a crowding in of beings as if the Celtic Faerie land of Fay had become momentarily co-present with where I was. I sensed them, but did not experience these creatures. The sucking experience took over for a while then, driving the morphological acrobatics of spacelove that lay before me. There was something about it that makes me think of a voluptuous alien seductress with big, fat lips pulling me to her body in the weirdest feeling embrace ever. It felt like I was being smeared sensually and lustfully around the space in some sort of vacuum-tube funhouse. At this point (maybe a minute into the experience) I started picking up something like the Escher painting of all those sets of stairs with figures descending by all manners of gravity, only its surfaces were emerald isles of what I can only describe as fractal Medusa liquid, serpentine and sexy. There was a thought that I was in a room full of aliens and they were playing with me, but that somehow they had conspired to make me this way — the alien carney music bar on the planet Tatooine in the Star Wars trilogy seems relevant.

Then I had the thought (which just seems to pop up and not really pertain): 'What have I done! How did I get this way?', meaning, how did I come to enter something so foreign that my petty human ontological premises and hopeful body of knowledge seem like a wrench trying to adjust a camel? At that point I lost any touch with my body and was thrust forward into complete and utter amazement. The world became so crammed full of intricacy to the nth that it seemed every nook and cranny in my spacetime was exfoliating little crystalline dancing worlds, bellowing ecstasy. It moved like snakes move: all rippling of muscle and sun glinting scales. I cannot emphasize enough the catapulting, titanic motions of this iridescent zigzag bottle-rocket, this nuanced, whittling circus of form, this Brobignagian roller coaster safari across the jeweled plains of wonderland, straining the limits of the knowable.

This is where I was when I felt a certain sort of shockwave across the dome of the sky which gave me memory of the real world. I then entered this whole journey that I would call extrication. Going in was 'intrication' or delving into intricacy, so coming back out was sensibly extrication. The experience was very literally an incedible groping back out of this wild wooly thing until I made it 'out', which afterwards I realized was only the physical action of opening my eyes. The pipe was in my mouth — its touching my lips had been the reality shockwave I'd felt. The woman who was handling the pipe for me looked like a fractal Medusa as well, but incarnate — she was buzzing all over with this really freaky energy. I said something like, 'You expect me to call this a mouth?', a comment which was silenced by the stem of the pipe. One toke and I was out of my body again, yanked back through the scrim of the worlds into the blast furnaces of heaven.

I 'came to' in some sense at this point and realized that I could do anything in a space like this, could instantly unfold my richest possible imaginings. 'O.K.', I said to myself, 'What about trying to do what you believe possible by your perceptual theory of higher-dimensional experience?' You see, I got the idea that there is no reason why, in an inner experience, one has to have visions only in front of one. I began to believe this was an imprint that years of bringing the external world into construction of inner spaces had created, but was not necessary. I then tried to imagine what it would be like to see in every direction at once, i.e. what would a ball look like if you could see every side of it at once? I could sense it but not imagine it in my mind. So this is the challenge I set myself. It not only seemed to work (though with everything else going on inside, it was a bit like trying to do a sensitive physics experiment in the midst of a drunken bacchanal) but it did so immediately. I rushed upwards into this superspace that was a spun galactic ecology of stars, a swarming hive of dragonfly constellations . . . This was very profound, but in doing it, it seemed I had reduced the alien quality of what had been going on previous to this excursion.

I let my will go then and tumbled forward into elfland. Terence McKenna is apt in calling these entities 'elves'. They are elves/not-elves. They don't appear, they kind of ooze out of the woodwork seductively and before you know it they're there — the whole realm is infested with these creatures like nothing else you could ever imagine. They do sing things that are like 'self-dribbling jeweled basketballs' or whatever you want to call them. They make Faberge egg concoctions with ingredient lists like: 1) space, 2) lust, 3) politics, 4) circus sideshows, 5) time, 6) gall bladders, 7) existential notions of polyfidelity, 8) cucumbers, 9) Beethoven's 5th symphony, 10) the smell of petunias, and so on. This is somewhat of an arbitrary list, but the point is, all my categories of mind fell away because they were being ceaselessly synthesized and re-synthesized into these hyperdimensional objects, undulating, ululating along. It makes me think of getting home from school when your mother says that she's baked you some treats, only these are like no treats Mom ever made, and when you see them you almost want to say, 'Aw, mom, you shouldn't have. I mean you really shouldn't have'. What you do with these elves is some sort of a game of catch, only the physics of the game has been replaced by the physics of synesthesia. In catching the things they threw, in playing with them, I participated in the ineffable mysteries that they were. This place is the Joycean 'Merry go raum'. Being there I came to understand the Heraclitus fragment: 'The Aeon is a child at play with colored balls'. It is this. As well I understand, 'Still the first day, All Fool's Day, here at the center.' It is this too.

So for what seemed like centuries I played with the trippy freaky elves and they kept bringing me into atrium after atrium in the antics annex, and all I could do was wonder when we would get to their front door. As far as I know, we never did. Instead they said many things, though I can't say they used what we would call a voice to accomplish this communication. I remember only parts of this. At first they said, 'Build this', indicating hyperspace. Later they amended this by saying, 'Build it. He will come.' from the movie Field of Dreams. Very funny.

Then it was as though alarms started to go off, and the whole space was going through these quivering emergency elaborations. I get the image of a submarine movie sequence when I think back on this, just when it has been discovered on the surface, the periscope retracts and the whole interior goes into haywire, preparatory gymnastics as all the hatches are battened down. There is a phenomenally high-energy dynamic associated with this part, as they try to get you out and shut the great bronze dancing doors of hyperspace. It is as if everything is charged with imponderable electricities and is racing around because someone shouted: 'Places everyone!!' They start cramming your soul out of there with a million hands at once, grabbing you by twelve dimensions you never knew your body had. Finally, the thing shuts and there is a sense of finality to that, but just as soon you are on to the next thing.

Report #3 — entities

It was like a gauze layer of the dream just separated and boom ... it was like walking from a dark night into a brightly lit casino in Las Vegas. I felt like I had walked behind the scenes into a series of rooms. Everything was prime color cranked up to its fullest potential. The images were clear, crisp and vivid. many times more vivid then the early pre-room images.

There were two people a man and a women or a girl and a boy. They appeared to me like simple balloon computer generated images. As soon as I stepped in the room, they glided up to me and spoke directly to me. They kept saying welcome back and words like: the big winner, he has returned, welcome to the end and the beginning, you are The One! As I looked around the room I felt the sense of some huge celebration upon my entry to this place. Bells were ringing, lights flashing fear began to rise in me as I felt the deep change in my world. The sprites begin to lead me around the room showing me how all my life they had been preparing me for this return. I was shown dozen of experiences simultaneously in my life, that had lead up to and been clues to this moment. I was shown in a flood and a onslaught of images, thoughts, situations, raw feelings that everything had been building to this moment. That this moment had been planned.

They told me it was a gift. That I had been selected to be The One. I felt feelings of huge relief, excitement and fear in the sprites. At this moment in the experience I became afraid for my life. I felt that this gift would cost me my life. I did not want to be The One. The sprits felt this fear in me and begin to hold my hands and arms rushing me deeper into their world. I felt their fear and I began to believe that I had stepped out of the dream, out of the drug, out of my body and mind and into this super world. I began to believe in the transformation.

As I walked deeper I could see standing in the middle of the room, in the center of this place, an object similar to an hour glass. It was slowly turning over. I became aware that this vessel, as it tipped over, transferring its contents from the small red end to the larger blue end was transforming me. I felt my humanity slip out as I was filled with this new powerful light. A light of greater perception, of clarity. It felt like returning home. It felt familiar. It felt like I was waking up from a hollow, pale dream of reality. I felt god-like and omnipotent. I realized the this gift was not only a gift but equally a death sentence for my physical body. I felt like I had been chosen to receive this not out of benevolence but out of a need to release this power and perception There had to be The One, to relieve the others. There had to be The One who perceived completely. I felt like Christ at the moment of realization of godhood and the inevitable moment of his crucifixion. I also felt like all this knowledge and perception was far too large to be processed by my physical mind and that death was the obvious transition.

As this moment of realization hit me I felt the sprites smile and step back. They told me I WAS The One and this WAS real and that it would never end.

They said do you not believe..... then see.

At this moment I sat up (in the real world) and opened my eyes. This moment true panic set in. I was deeply hallucinating. The real world was being covered, transformed into a psychedelic kaleidoscope of energy. Every surface had something like movie film, one image after another lined up like film shown through an overhead projector. These were the prime images of our symbolic nature. Slowly rolling over every surface, like the sprites of the objects. I felt I was seeing time in a singularity. I felt like I was seeing the symbolic patterns like a second perception of true meaning. In the real room there were two people sitting next to me. When I looked at them I felt reassured momentarily. Then they exploded into dozens of two-dimensional layers of light. Looking like computer generated futurists paintings. Wafer thin halos created the shapes of my friends. Dave looked up at me and said Welcome Back causing me to panic. Because when he said welcome back I did not think it was back to reality but back into the fold of this super world I was in. Back as their chosen one or at least one amongst them. I perceived Dave and Poon as personal guides or Guardians or gatekeepers there to welcome me into this new exalted state. That moment stripped me of my world, my truths leading me to believe that my hallucinations were truth. I once again had the crashing feeling of winning, of being chosen, and being forced to receive this unwanted sentence of total vision. I had this crash as I could see once again the cause and effect of my being there and the price I would have to pay. I was the Bean King and the price of my gift would be perceptual transcendence but physical death.

At this time I felt a collapsing feeling as I gave in to the experience excepting my fate. I remember thinking that the hour glass had turned a little farther and I was pouring out of this life into my new one. I said out loud I am dying. Then I lost the support of my body, my self, my existence and I began to drift.

Dave then touched my leg. I remember being drawn back into my body and thinking to hell with this I am not going to die, not yet and I felt the sprites smiling around me looking at me. I felt the fear. I felt the exhilaration of my visions. I was back in the sprites room. Even though this place was vibrant and psychedelic it was within my ability to comprehend. The sprites began there pitch at me being a winner and The One. I felt they were taking me back down the hallway to open those iconic, electric visions and to my death. I then said out loud again 'I am dying', to which Dave responded, only three more minutes and you will be alright.

Report #4

I have no time to reflect on this, because, suddenly, I’m in front of a giant swirling disc, with coloured moving patterns, the “chrysanthemum” that McKenna talked about, and I’m pushed into it. It feels almost too intense and I got the impression that I was definitely heading down the rabbit hole this time, am I dying? I have little time to contemplate this, cause fluid starts coming out of every part of my body, feet, arms, head, ass and heart are all pouring out some liquid substance which is somehow me, I can no longer feel my body. I have the impression of lying in a hospital bed, with doctors watching over me, monitoring my condition, discussing excitedly. Then my consciousness slips, which bothers me today, because something extraordinary must have happened while I was unconscious.

I am first aware of an energy rising up from the base of my spine, hearing some noise that remind me of applause and cheering, open my eyes and see the room I left bathed in semi-liquid diamonds and emeralds. The energy rising through my spine becomes a sound made deep in the stomach and travelling up to my throat where it comes out of my mouth, but also out of my forehead in the form and shape of lightning, slowly moving towards and, finally, into my guide’s head, who instantly starts laughing uncontrollably, sending the lightning back into my head. It’s like an orgasm within the pineal gland, and I feel free, I am at one with my experience and suddenly know myself, although I can’t describe what that self is, it simply is, no words will ever stick to it. Both voice and experience fades, but I do not try to hold on to them, I realize I am going to be inside a human body once again and feel no regret about it, somehow it’s the right thing to do.

Report #5

Upon entering hyperspace I perceived myself falling through a tunnel in zero gravity at light speed then once again I penetrated a 'bubble/membrane' and was in what I refer to as 'The Dome' or 'The Control Panel' only this time instead of a percieved 'octopoid' redirecting my awareness to various structures there was this huge gelatinous-hexagonal-rubix-cube type machine that would reform itself into structures according to these progressive harmonic tones that permeated my reality causing various emotions to emerge; in addition it was redirecting my attention to various intersections of its restructured embodiment.

Each time my attention was pointed to one of these intersections/nodes a vision followed by a revelation would envelope me along with an emotion I can only describe as pure elation and awe. The only vision/relevation that I vividly remember was one of humanity's history. I recall seeing many people in positions of power from ancient civilizations from all around the globe. I could see a distinct spectrum of colors for each spirit that belonged to each of these kings/warriors/ thieves/martyrs/prophets and shamans.

I saw their entire lifespan from birth to death and then saw how each of these kings/warriors etc. subconsiously chose the exact moment they were going to die as well as how they died and as result of their choices their spirits were reborn into the bodies of the leaders/warriors/shamans of the next generation in order to continue their spiritual development where it left off in addition to being catalysts for events of novelty that were yet to unfold (ie some warriors reborn as leaders etc). This process of reincarnation continued generation after generation up until the present day.

Report #6 — entities

Purple fractals flowed through my view of perception. It was as if I was looking through a kaleidoscope and these visions became more and more beautiful as each moment passed. Soon I was greeted by three blue individuals, two seemed male-like and one was definitely a female. The female seemed to be the ‘leader’ of the crew; she was standing in front of the other two and was waving me towards her. She was not of this world but had a human-like body, however her head was triangular shaped — almost spade shaped actually — with one angle pointing northward and the other two angles due east and west. She wanted to show me something and was calling me to come closer.

Unfortunately, in the excitement of trying DMT for the first time none of us remembered to turn off the telephone ringer and the phone rang during my experience. This immediately brought me back into reality, but not so far that I could not easily go back. I took this opportunity, however, to tell Brad what was happening. I was so excited to share the experience with someone that I could not wait until it was over to speak. The female was urging me to come back and to stop sharing my experience with others at this point. She was telling me to quiet my mind so that I could fully experience what she wanted to share with me. In fact, teaching me to quiet my mind was the message that she offered and it did not seem as if I would be getting more from her. As I continued to come in and out of the trip I also continued to share my experience with Brad. This angered her because she had specifically told me not to share it yet, and simply wanted me to quiet my mind. I was not ready for this message at this juncture in life, and yet I was totally ready. The beings bid farewell, as they seemed rather offended by my arrogance and desire to control the experience.

Report #7 — entities

This time I was swept under a door crack and taken into a dark corridor. Everything around me was black, except for the beings, who appeared to be brightly glowing blue light beings. This time I was not greeted per se, but rather they were all doing yoga. There were several of them, poised in mannequin-like yoga positions, and sharing their wisdom through my attentiveness. I felt confused by their desire to teach me yoga, and questioned the message I was being sent. I was shown the door through which I had originally slipped under, but chose to stay and learn from them. However, after several minutes of watching them perform yoga I directed myself back towards the door. It seemed as if I was not quite prepared to hear the message, as was the case with my first trip.

Report #8 — entities

Patterns and colors of India dominated my visual world and this time there were no beings, only messages. There were glowing lights surrounding me, which were teaching me holistic breathwork techniques. I remember breathing in a hurried fashion, and they were scolding me for rushing to learn. I began to practice the breaths, slowly taking in each breath then feeling it energize and replenish my body before letting it go. At this point, my partner was a bit concerned (he told me this after my return) because I was not actually breathing; although my breath was being guided by the lights I was not actually taking in breath. After several minutes I began to return to my body, however I could come and go back into the trip as I pleased.

Now the lights seemed to take form, not human form but rather life-like forms of some sort. They became brown and reddish in color, and were being quite sultry and seductive while attempting to lure me in to join them. As I turned away I thought, “Well, why not? I am tripping and their energy feels nice so maybe I will just see where this takes me.” I felt some sort of sexual energy passing from them through me.

Report #9 — entities

Next everything in my surrounding vision started to vibrate with life and energy. Then suddenly, it was as if a flash had gone off in my head, and I left my body. Now I was in a very different place. I could still see the room, but now I was looking at it from a different dimension. I remember thinking to myself, “This is how things really are”. The DMT dimension is not any more or less real than our ‘normal’ world. It is simply different.

I recall closing my eyes and immediately seeing what I can only describe as a female creature that reminded me of a medieval witch. Her head was triangular but her body appeared to have the same shape as a human-like figure. She almost appeared animated, yet I could not call her ‘cartoon-like’. What I will never forget is the life in her eyes. Unlike the visions I’ve experienced with other psychedelics, this vision did not seem connected to my ego in any way. It appeared to exist on its own, completely independent of myself. She smiled and extended her hand towards me. I felt as though she wanted me to take it but I didn’t because it was all a little intimidating. The idea of directly interacting with an entity I was seeing on DMT suddenly seemed very unnerving to me. I don’t know why I felt this way because I only felt warm and friendly vibes coming from her. I just did not feel completely at ease with the situation. I rejected her hand and she soon disappeared. I only wonder if I did the right thing.

The next vision I recall was a multi-armed goddess dancing against a golden background. Again there was this life force I could see in her eyes. Almost as if I was looking into the soul of this vision. The manner in which she was dancing, and the feelings I experienced as a result of witnessing this display, was very powerful and emotional for me. Though I can’t explain in words what it was all about, her dancing seemed to have a deeper meaning. As though each movement held a new mystery into the greater scheme of things. It was one of the more beautiful displays I have ever seen in my life. The ironic thing is my best friend later reported seeing the exact same vision as I did, and it seemed to occur for him at the same time I experienced it. I believe our minds were on the same level at this point; or rather we were at the same place. When I opened my eyes, I saw him staring at me and then he smiled. He then reached out his hand for mine and I took it. When this happened, out two bodies seemed to form into one object. We hovered and floated about the room in a sea of color and light, spinning into hyperspace.

Shortly after, I can remember looking over my shoulder to see this being dressed in what I can only describe as disco-influenced conquistador clothing, gesturing for me to follow it. It seemed to want to lead me into the bedroom just behind it. Again, what really stood out to me was the life it had in its eyes. This just did not seem like a simple psychedelic vision. As with the first entity I encountered, this was as ‘real’ to me as anything else. For some reason I did not get good vibes from this thing. I do not know what it wanted from me, but I felt I was wise to ignore it. I recall once hearing from McKenna that not all the entities you will meet on DMT have the best intentions. I sure did not feel this one had, and it soon disappeared. I closed my eyes again to witness multi-colored geometric castles rapidly being destroyed and then recreated right before my very amazed mind.

I opened my eyes and discovered that my body was covered with objects that seemed to be exploring me. These were small machine-like forms that seemed to float just above the surface of my skin, never actually touching it. They reminded me of miniature robotic vacuum cleaners with scanning noses. Advanced mechanical objects, each attempting to report on a different region of my body. Amazingly enough, this did not frighten me in any way. I simply closed my eyes again and let these objects continue to explore me. However when I shut my eyes they were still there! They continued to shuffle about in my line of sight before eventually disappearing, only to be replaced with other visions. I have no idea what it all meant, but everything seemed to have purpose. I opened my eyes again and noticed that around seven minutes had passed since we took the DMT.

Report #10

Before my eyes were even shut, I was pretty much not aware of my body or what had just happened or anything except massive mosaic patterned matrices, and huge floods of information with maddeningly looping thoughts... I felt quite confined in my thinking and some of my predominant thoughts from the last few days and minutes beforehand were playing over and over. .. definaie aztecy motif to it all.

I opened my eyes what must have been about 3-4 mins later and I could see my reality (living room) but it was just overwhelming liquid colours moving everywhere so I closed my eyes again..

I had lost my sense of time, but when I finally was able to open my eyes and kinda get a grip and focus on things it had been about 5 mins total, and I wasn't able to stand up right away. Over the next few mins, second by second, the visuals receded and I was able to walk around, a bit disoriented, exclaiming 'Holy fuck', 'that was fucked up' repeatedly.

Report #11 — entities

I twisted into the other dimension, the DMT space of wonderment. I left from my body into a dimensional time-warp, and in this constant dimension shift I saw thousands of entities bursting out, welcoming me and sharing in the beauty of life, a song of glory. My emotions exploded. I felt mentally sober and aware throughout, despite the worm-hole-like journey. I perceived this world from radical perspective shifts, and yelled 'Oh my god, so good, so beautiful!' Twisting, churning; the world burst into multi-colored energy balls and entities. They formed a ball of blue stonish grey, and grabbed at me but as friends, as the same as me.

Eventually they slipped away, and I was left with a new type of creature, that had a mostly black face but with colorful features. I felt pokes and tugs but it was not at all bad; they seemed as if they were me, and I knew the goodness of everything; goodness was this space. The music was happy music, and enhanced the experience dramatically.

Report #12 — entities

Colored dancers were pulsing, spinning, making liquid cartoons. Not really animations, but clear shades of color, forming a toy playground. They made this delight of breathing easy. All the playground objects were alive, including the swings and the merry-go-round. A silvery-blue arch of plastic color formed and collapsed in the center. A toy little boy, or maybe she was a little girl, jumped along this object, sliding down it, hanging on with small fingers, leaping into the grass. I felt a sense of responsibility begin to resonate within me, both for the knowledge of my wife and my coming child, and the deep psychedelic responsibility of my shamanic-like path. I glanced away briefly and one of the DMT beings, tall, thin and golem-like, grasped my head and turned it back to see. The shapes kept moving, and the child was my innocence too, and it was asking me to promise to share that innocence completely with our shinebelly baby when she/he births and grows and becomes human. The toy child ran up the blue arch slide, and down the other side.

A starsparkle of love burst in me just then, and my breath followed the divine pattern of the now familiar ecstatic sweetness... the child entity waved and the playground objects tinkled laughter. 'Come play again,' they invited.

Report #13 — entities

This time when the colors came they were dark and smoky around the edges. And the gargantuan guardians showed up, two of them. They hunkered in front of me, in front of the spinning DMT mandala, and wouldn't let me enter. They sent thoughts to me, and said I should not be so hasty, that I should take my time entering this space. Silvergirl had her arms around my neck, though her flesh was very ghostlike. She said I'd satisfied my question, that smoking the DMT magic in succession in an effort to surf back into the DMT reality didn't really work. Oral DMT is the answer to stay there longer, without the keys being taken away.

The guardians nodded. 'Trust her,' they said. Then they bunched their muscles and the DMT faded into a dream-like sequence, very male and cocky with me and other beings working out and flexing muscles. Silvergirl laughed and that dream vanished.

Report #14 — entities

As I held in the vapor the entire room began to shimmer. It seemed as if every surface had been polished to mirror shine; clean, brilliant and perfect. Light was everywhere, bouncing off of me and moving through me. The depth and contour of light was so elaborate that every surface seemed to be crawling with life, convecting, pulsing and oozing with its own signature vibration.

I stared up at the stucco patterns on the ceiling and noticed they had begun to crawl. Random bumps became little eyes, pointed noses, giggling mouths. The little people had arrived and were literally coming out of the woodwork. They poked out of the ceiling, waved and made faces. I could make out four of them; a stickly troll, a laughing clown, a dancing harlequin, a diabolical imp.

They were bouncing a spinning object between them, a complex geometrical shape spun like a top. My curiosity about this object grew and the harlequin held it out to me. As its hands telescoped down from the ceiling I could see it was balancing a spinning jewel on its index finger.

I suddenly realized that I was having Terence McKenna's trip. Damn if he wasn't rght-on-the-nose about these crazy elves. As this realization washed over me the elves burst into uproarious laughter. They were laughing themselves silly, giggling, rolling across the ceiling and holding their stomachs. But there was somethng else. I felt there was more to this space than just the elves and time was running out. I pushed beyond elvin mischief deeper into the DMT realm. I did not expect what came next.

Dave had put on some music before sending me up, a tribal thing wth lots of drumming and grunting. As the elves retreated the music became alive. Everything in the room reverberated to the sound of the music. A chorus of bongos and erotic moaning pounded through the room. A tightening rush of energy tingled in my abdomen. I could smell my lover.

'It's sex,' I announced to Dave in total awe. It was the first thing I said since inhaling. It was barely one minute into the trip and the room became alive with sex. Images of nude bodies entangled in tantric frenzy filled every spot I looked. Pictures of mushrooms became ejaculating penises. The smooth curve of a beer bottle became my lover's ass, a touch of blue became her eyes. She was with me, inside me, inside my reality.

My body tensed up so tight I felt like I was having an orgasm. Although I never attained an erection, my legs and abdomen suddenly felt covered by a thick, warm, electric fluid. I was startled and stood up. The sensation slid off me.

Report #15

I was in a completely different universe — it was in no way similar to reality. Somehow the terror was not unpleasant. The universe I was in did not have room for pleasant/unpleasant, happy/sad, etc. There were 3 types of emotion: terror, euphoria, and the baseline emotion which was like full awareness of the only important universe — the one I had gained access to — the domain of the spirits/mind/consciousness — whatever.

The visual effects were astounding. I wasn't perceiving things through my eyes (I didn't have a body), I just knew what my environment was, and therefore what it looked like. Closing my eyes did not change the scene in any significant way. There were icons and images of things such as a stylised eagle — all reminiscent of Inca or perhaps ancient Egyptian religious art (not that I know anything about Inca or ancient Egyptian art). These images were always moving and evolving in some kind way. These images were like decoration for the place I was in. There were worm/snake-like things inside my legs (which were translucent), but at the time I didn't realise they were my legs. The hallucinations were in no way similar to LSD hallucinations. These things were real, ever present and in perfect clarity. The quality of light had changed in some indefinable way — not more intense colours, but more clear, more real (the most real) — what I was seeing was pure and unadulterated reality, not a rough approximation made by faulty perception mechanisms.

I knew that I, that is, my mind, had left my body and was in the realm of the basic entity of the universe — where consciousnesses reside when they are not tied to a body on our Earthly reality. I was aware that this is where spirits/souls reside if their body dies and probably where they are before you are born. After you are born, it is still there, but your mind becomes solely concerned with your body (until you are released by DMT). I knew that it was possible to enter this 'realm of the gods' without DMT — it just involved losing all beliefs and constructs. At the time I called it 'the realm of the gods' for lack of any other way to describe it, but this is completely misleading as the gods were just human consciousnesses/souls/spirits, and they had no interest in the normal reality — they had not created it, nor influenced it in any way. The realm of the gods involved complete exposure and full awareness of the absolute chaos, power and unboundedness of the universe (not the universe we know, but the one where consciousnesses exist).

The first hour was indescribably intense — an unbounded (infinite does not seem to be enough) number of things were happening at once and my mind was being exposed to information it could not cope with. I knew I was insane, and I doubted that I would ever recover. I did not even know what being sane meant. I could not remember what it was like to be normal. Most of the time I was not terrified, but terror-full, although this terror was not unpleasant (pleasure did not enter into it) and it did not effect my thinking. It was not bad or good — it just was.

Report #16

All I saw with my eyes closed were these geometric shapes that were all interlocked and gracefully flowing. The color of these shapes was like clear crystal. Each had droplets of other colors within them: blue, pink, red, green. My vision was in 3-D. Some shapes were in the foreground, others in the background. Slowly they would switch from foreground to background. I was aware of nothing else but this vision. I had no memory of anything else. I had no point of reference anymore other than this vision. Nothing else existed. This was my entire universe at that moment

Report #17 — entities

Suddenly, my world was filled with incredible multi-colored geometric designs that changed rapidly in a kaleidoscopic fashion. The visions were beautiful and ever changing. I can’t ever recall seeing such colorful beauty with a psychedelic before.

I opened my eyes, and the next thing I knew there was this face popping out of a book laying on my desk. It was difficult to make out, but it was clearly a female and she was smiling at me. Most dramatic were they eyes. They seemed to posses a life of their own. Unlike other psychedelics, this vision did not seem attached to my ego or me. Usually, I can see myself instilled in the surrounding objects, and everything appears to be an extension of my ego. I feel a connection to everything. Not this time: this face seemed to exist completely independent of myself. Was this an entity? Was this a connection? Whatever occurred, it was amazing to me. I shut my eyes again for a moment and when I opened them she was gone.

Report #18

I see extremely sharp and intricate colorful pastel yellow, red, and green geometrical moving patterns all around me. I sense all beings who have ever used, or will ever use DMT are here with me. I did not see any individual people, or hear any words. It was a kind of feeling. This kind of sensing is not available in my everyday unaltered state, so it is difficult to describe in the english language, but it was clear and powerful.

The DMT space has a familiar feel to it. When I go to the DMT space, I often think, now I remember, this is where I have been before. It is a place that cannot be remembered once the DMT wears off, as the space is permeated by some senory field which is in addition to the normal senses. This sensory field is like thought except the thoughts are not coming from myself. Telepathy, time travel, genetic memory, earth consciousness, all are possible descriptions. This is a new frontier. An unknown

Report #19 — entities

Suddenly I began to hear a loud, moderately high-pitched carrier wave. immediately, the room started vibrating in sympathy. the pattern on the wall hangings oscillated madly in time to the buzzing that overlaid the carrier wave's fundamental tone. Simultaneously, a heavy, trembling feeling swept over my entire body as if I were being propelled at multiple g acceleration by some giant rocket engine. My visual field dissolved in the most amazing colors. I could not see the room over the intensity of the visual effects.

The events of the preceding paragraph occurred in the space of a few short seconds. Closing my eyes, I got a glimpse of several entities moving in front of a giant complex control panel. The visions were not crystal-clear and seemed as if I were viewing it through a scrim. The creatures were bipedal and of about human size. It was impossible to say more other than that they did not move like the giant insect creatures I have seen clearly under the influence of stropharia mushrooms. There was a direct awareness of an overwhelmingly powerful and knowledgable *presence*! it was neither frightening, nor encouraging. It was just mentally there. A thought came, unbidden, into my head. I realized that I was viewing "god central". The central panel I saw was the control panel for the entire universe.

The vision was fleeting and dissolved into a vision of much greater clarity. A gaggle of elf-like creatures in standard issue Irish elf costumes, complete with hats, looking like they had stepped out of a hallmark cards "Happy Saint Patrick's Day" display, were doing strange things with strange objects that seemed to be a weird hybrid between crystals and machines.

This vision was also fleeting, and it dissolved into a visual pattern unlike that experienced by me on any other psychedelic or combination of psychedelics. The visuals were interlocking sinusoidal patterns arranged in a Japanese chrysanthemum pattern that filled my entire visual field. The pattern was ever-changing and the colors of the individual patterns changed independently of the underlyng pattern. The colors were intense and came in a magnificent variety of colors: metallics, monochromes, pastels, each flickering in and out of existence as if obeying some undetected ordering principle.

Report #20 — entities

Within seconds I was shooting through a dimension that didn't involve the physical reality we now experience on Earth. Time, the way we experience it normally, seemed to stop, only to reveal a world of infinite knowledge and beauty. A place where the very fabric of life was flowing through everything. I remember my friend who had already experienced DMT had told me to remember that Everything is how it should be and to try and remind yourself to keep breathing and surrender to the experience.

Once fully immersed in this new world I was astonished to find out that I could communicate with other beings that also seemed to be sharing this experience. Although I had read about people like Terence McKenna seeing gnomes and machine elves as he put it, I experienced orb-like creatures who would come close and then come together in formations almost as if to try and tell me to do what they were doing. I kept saying 'Oh my god' over and over and was completely overwhelmed with infinite knowledge of how the world really was and that the love that was all around us always could bring so much power and manifest into anything we wanted. I also experienced visions of the sacred geometry that I am now finding out to exist everywhere. It is the fabric of these realities that we experience. It represents the perfection in all that we are.

Report #21

I had left my body & ego, my memories, morals and fears, and I had entered Nirvana. I was home. Flying through a multidimensional place of pure vision and thought, I saw endless arches of golden salamanders, flowing through the very fabric of space & time, their colors changing and rotating like countless kaleidoscopes, smiling and looking at me. My form and vision were shifting all the time, and I saw countless non-defined being, animals, flowers, trees, jewels and crystals, while the salamanders were telling and showing me the secret of life. Heavenly music, harp-strings and choirs ad infinitum were caressing my mental g-spot. There were no questions anymore, all was answered, and there was eternal unity. I was omnipotent. I was the universe. And the universe laughed and laughed, about itself and the joke of life it pulled on it! The most beautiful place in the universe, and I had found it! It's soooo sweet, soooo beautifull and loving, it's magic.

Report #22 — entities

I open my eyes and look around to see a world quite different to any I've ever seen before. Around me is a dimension where everything seems to be woven into a beautiful psychedelic environment that at first seem to be big blocks of solid colour but on closer inspection are intricately patterned with information.

I see the image of Chris sitting in front of me be dismantled piece by piece by tiny little elf-like creatures who wave at me as they cart away the pieces of the puzzle, revealing yet another dimension beneath.

I lie on my back and become aware of what was once my backyard now appearing to me as these huge planes of living tapestry. I marvel at the beauty of it, repeating my enthralled 'oooohhh's as I exhale. I am enraptured and I like this place, I sit up rapidly to look around more and see the trees and Chris lying in the grass. Then I think 'that's not chris — this is another dimension' and as I look at him he smiles and all his teeth are different, fluorescent colours and each dreadlock looks as if it's made of many colourful beads.

Report #23 — entities

SYMBIOTIC CRYSTALS ... all around. Always there, since the beginning. They had a lot to tell.

AJLaM was instructed to convey the following information to all sentients in her reality:

Endosymbiotic crystals are the breathing essence of consciousness. They are the living builders of the universal MIND. They have unique identities and funny names. Their language is empathy-based. They can actually speak English ... Very friendly toward anyone who wants to PLAY. Their society is a self-organized dissipative structure driving force of novelty and creativity in the universe.

Report #24

The couch buckled and I was hurled head first into a world of bright color. I was as if I had just witnessed the disintegration of the known world. This new world was one of geometric shapes, and beautiful creatures soaring through the air. I looked down at my body to discover that I was geometric too. I was made of triangles and squares.

That world began to melt too, until I was forced into a long, dark, hallway-like room that seemed to go on forever. This hallway began to breathe, and each breath it took, a different color appeared. First it was all black, then some gray, then white, then yellow, and orange. It breathed faster and faster, creating different colors that the human eye has never seen before. I floated through this hallway faster and faster, until I was going so fast that the colors were blurs now. I could see ahead of me now, and it was blue colored fire.

When I got to the fire, it didn't burn. It didn't hurt at all, in fact it was soothing. The fire created hands that held and nurtured me. It began to push me down, slowly push me down. I could feel myself sinking in something.

I looked around and all I saw was white. I looked and I looked until I realized that I was sinking in a clock. The clock wasn't your average clock; it had hundreds of hands, moving everywhere, all at different speeds.

I sunk deeper and deeper into the clock, until I couldn't see the clock's surface any more. I was falling through green and blue hues now. I looked down and all I saw was tie-dyed pools of liquid.

I fell farther and farther until I went into the tie-dyes liquid. The liquid was like a thin sheet of glass. When I hit the glass-like liquid, it shattered into millions of pieces. All I saw was the glass, only the glass.

Report #25 — entities

I saw a giant neon spider-like being from the inside out. I was in its multi-chambered heart, moving outwards through its body. It communed with me, and taught me to surrender. It showed me the part of my brain I needed to exercise to let the DMT come over me. I was surprised at how much control I had over the experience (unlike my one plain DMT experience, which was all about me not really knowing how to surrender, despite my experiences with other psychedelics).

I let the DMT spider 'fuck' me. It felt amazing. I was sad when it left, I did not want to come down. When we did come down, we all had forgotten that we smoked weed along with the DMT. Something in the mixture of the two made us higher by far than we would have been just smoking the weed.

Report #26

I felt and heard this buzzing sound/feeling creeping up on me, and at the same time my vision of the world and my two friends started to rise above me, like I was dropping fast! I replied, 'Holy Shit!!' J and S tried to Shhhh me because my dad was right upstairs, but it made no difference, for I felt the buzzing and dropping away increase.

My heart started to race faster and faster, I had dropped off and out of this reality. I started wigging out, scared shitless! I remember saying to my friends, whom I no longer could recognize, for everything had become electrostatic energy: 'Who are you! What's happening to me!' Then my whole existence zoomed instantaneously to another plane of being. Between the zooming occurrence and approaching this new world, I was convinced I was dying, my death had finally come. I felt so much pain and fear during this zoom, I was totally paralyzed; mind and body. I could not conceive of time or space. When I finally emerged into this vast new world, it felt like I was looking down at our universe. I now knew I was dead, so I decided to stop trying to fight it and let go.

Report #27 — entities

The demigod's form was like this — he (I knew it was a he) had a human body, more or less. But rather than a head, he had an enormous flower. I saw this flower as very three-dimensional, transluscent, and glowing in neon-like lines of color. And it was not just any flower. The petals rose out and bifurcated in countless tiny petals and leaves, all arranged in a geometric kaleidoscope fashion (though — from my perspective — the kaleidoscope was 'turned' to face the other person, not me). The pistils inside the flower were like bundles of tentacles, each also bifurcating into countless tiny tentacles, the whole lot slowing turning and swirling in precise geometric motion. This flower god was intensely beautiful — more beautiful than anything I had ever seen before. The colors were impossibly vivid. The transluscency was magnitudes beyond any Alex Gray painting. The geometry was more crisp and symmetrical than any kaleidoscope. The motions were in beautiful harmony with each other. Yet this thing was also very organic, and seemed like a living thing, with intentionality. It walked over to the other person who was in the DMT space. This person was lying back, inert. The flower god stood over this person, pointing its 'flower head' down at the person, and 'displayed itself' in all its beauty. It was as if it saw this inert person and came over to 'show it something'. 'Hey, take a look at *this*'. After just a few seconds, the vision dissipated and transformed into something else.

After it wore off, I was so awed, I quickly wanted to try again. :) I had heard you need to wait an hour or so before smoking more. I waited just about an hour, slightly less. I was kinda eager, in my calm and peaceful way. I smoked until I felt that warm, somewhat alarming buzz. I put the pipe down, laid back, and closed my eyes. And saw *nothing*. I thought 'damn, I tried smoking again too quickly'. But there was *some* color and geometry behind my eyes. And after a few seconds, it was like a wall of DMT space slid into view. As compared to last time, the colors and geometry etc was less intense, but still very beautiful. There was a lot more 'darkness' in this trip. At some point, the visions formed into a 'shadow lady'. She approached me face on. I could not see her very well. She looked at me for a moment — a swirling kaleidoscope of color. Then it seemed like she took a long tube — like a blowgun — and put one end in her 'mouth', and the other end in *my* mouth, and she 'blew' a stream of colorful patterns, like glowing molecules, into me. Although the visual intensity was less than before, it was still beautiful beyond any ordinary vision. Plus, there was the strong sense of there really being a demigod here, giving me a gift. I knew she wouldn't have given it to me had I not been totally receptive. If I had been grasping at all, or if I had had any particular desires for 'getting something' out of the trip, she would not have come to me. While she was 'blowing' stuff into me, I knew, on one hand, that this was 'just a waking dream'. On the other hand, the sense of her being a 'real' entity was equally clear. I felt like what she did to me was equivalent to what the flower-god did to that other person in the previous vision. As she dissipated, I mumbled 'thanks'.

Report #28 — entities

At first I saw frowning faces. I saw these when I looked to the right. It was a very symetrical, fractal image. Then I would look to the left and could see smiling faces, and everything was the opposite of the right side of my vision. The faces were good...and they were bad. They looked at me and asked me to choose. They were two opposite images that met in the middle and merged. I knew that it wasn't just images, something was showing me the duality of nature. It was like there were two true things and that both were the perfect opposite of each other. They each said, 'the other is a lie', and they were both right. It was paradox. I felt that I was supposed to try to discern which was true (later on I wondered if I was supposed to be able to accept that things were this way, that maybe nothing was true).

I got stuck in the paradox and was infinitely looking left, right, left, right. I kind of screamed inside my head that I didn't, couldn't, possibly know, and that I wanted to return to my room, to my space and time. I could vaguely hear my dog barking on the porch, so I knew that I was alive still. But something (me? the universe?) was like 'Look, back there and here are the same, things are just a lot more clear here. You have always been here; the other is just a representation of this. You will have to solve this puzzle someday. Things are reaching the end and if you aren't careful with what you choose, you'll get stuck here, in the paradox. You asked to come here, so help me answer the question.' It was like the universe itself didn't know what to make of the paradox, so it was asking me. It kept saying, 'Do you see? Do you see why life is the way it is? Do you see now why you can't know everything...because it is unknowable?'

I was terrified because it felt familiar, like it was true that I had always been there. Like maybe the life I’ve been living was just my escape from that place. The other frightening part was that it (the universe? me? god?) was pleading with me. It was flabbergasted that I still couldn’t make a choice. It was like it had ended the experiment too soon and I wasn’t ready yet, or maybe never would be.

(By the way, while I was 'there', it felt like I was in a small room, buried in the middle of some huge labrynth that housed everything...deep underground. Everything was in black and white. There were other beings there. They didn't seem all-wise or anything. They seemed rather mischievous...but friendly.)

Report #29

I sat on a chair with a large pipe in my hand stuffed with tobaco and 'Divine Moments of Truth' :-). I put the pipe in my mouth and inhaled one large dose. It felt hot but just as I had inhaled it, BAM! Suddenly I found my self sitting on the floor, the whole world around me changed into mosaic almost directly. I looked at the pipe and there were just a large black hole left of it. I closed my eyes and saw large chopping tools like knives and axes chopping up molecules then I understood that the molecules must be the earth. I saw thousands of them and suddenly they had formed a new dimension. This dimension was all made out of colors and you could hear different sound from everywhere in different frequencies. Large choppers now chopped up seven earths at the same time till it reached one billion and then sent out the pieces into outer space to start it all over again.

Suddenly I heard a BAM and opened my eyes, and there stood a large monster in front of me with white huge teeth and saliva dripping from his jaws. This monster started to dissolve into the black hole and I was also sucked into it. The rest of the trip is quite hard to explain but I can say that a lot of love and peace were involved. Thousands of Light beams were piercing my eyes as I was travelling 1000km/hr through the hole after the now almost transparent dragon figure. I could now feel the 'chi' inside my unimportant so-called body, streaming through my veins. ('Chi' is Japanese for nirvana/power).

Report #30 — entities

Gracie saw none of the visions described below. In fact, she saw no visions during the trip. She was high and the trip room took on a beautiful jewelled quality. She had no tendency to drift into a trance even though she had taken the same dosage of DMT and mushrooms as Zarkov.

Zarkov could not resist the trance. Strangely, he could talk with ease but could not maintain any other semblance of contact with reality. Any attempt to do so resulted in overwhelming stomach cramps, full body shivers, vertigo and throbbing headache. All of these body symptoms went away if he paid attention to the trance state.

Zarkov's first vision was a stadium full of hostile giant insect creatures that he was familiar with from previous mushroom trips. However, immediately the DMT 'banshee' creatures floated in and sang this message, 'Aren't they a dull and pompous bunch! But don't worry, they can't get at you because we are here.' These 'banshee' creatures were a common occurence in Zarkov's DMT trips.

The next series of visions were of various aliens that seemed to be trying to sell Zarkov various visions. The banshees continued to accompany the visions and offer comment.

At about the chemical peak of the trip (one hour), the house had a rash of poltergeist phenomena that were jointly observed by both of us. Furthermore, the cats noticed them and followed them as they made their way through the house. The banshees advised Zarkov not to worry about them because 'things like this happen.' This was the last point in the trip where Zarkov could maintain contact with ordinary reality.

The banshees formed a gate next to an alien selling visions indicating that Zarkov should 'buy into' this vision.

By 'going' through the gate, Zarkov found himself someplace else.

This some place else was another world. It no longer seemed like a psychedelic vision, but rather it seemed like a real world. The sun felt warm; when it went down Zarkov felt cool. To move around it was necessary to walk. Wherever he looked, there was a realistic amount of detail. No insubstantial visions, just a real world wherever Zarkov looked. He could eat, walk, swim, fuck and talk to the other characters.

The world was Gracie's fantasy world. Even though she couldn't see it, Zarkov's verbal description matched her world. She could give instructions to Zarkov that he could follow to get around.

The world was a bronze-age city. In the background were green and fertile mountains. The architecture was of massive granite blocks with a poured concrete look about them. The style was neoclassical crossed with Minoan with a touch of Jack Vance. The mise-en-scene made sense and did not appear contrived. The aesthetic sensibility, while of the wretched excess school, was coherent. It was the most beautiful place Zarkov had ever seen, in shades of pink, mauve, purple and gold.

The story line was that of the wierdest heavy metal video ever designed. There were barbaric artifacts and luxury items all over. The world was inhabited by buxom, bottom-heavy, voluptuous nymphos. Zarkov found himself in an elaborate caped outfit, somewhere between Darth Vadar and Ming the Merciless. His entourage was a group of cretinous, long-haired sleazos in heavy metal dress and carrying guitars. The trip consisted of a tour through the city from the wharf to the main temple where a three-day orgy took place.

The world somehow seemed like an isomorphic metaphor to Gracie's personality structure.

The world was coherent and consistent. It had internal rules as inexorable as the 'natural laws' on earth.

It had its own linear time. Subjectively, Zarkov spent three days in the world. Yet this voyaqe was encompassed in a normal six-hour mushroom trip. Furthermore, any attempt to reestablish contact with earth left huge gaps in the story since the world proceeded at its own pace, even if Zarkov wasn't paying attention.

It did not seem like telepathy or a projection from Gracie's head. Rather, we believe that somehow the fantasy world was lifted from Gracie's head and placed in the tryptamine 'library of all time and space' where Zarkov 'read out' the diskette.

The only psychedelic aspect to the world was the continual presence of the DMT banshees, albeit they were 'disguised' as a sort of observer/chorus as bats, orchids, etc., throughout the experience.

The DMT acted as a tuner of some sort for the mushroom experience. Certain aspects of the vision seemed characteristically DMT, like the banshees, the extreme time dilation, and the bejewelled colors. The mushroom contributed the epic quality, the exfoliating details and the practical joke quality of the whole set-up.

Such an experience, if controllable, would be extremely useful to a shaman trying to treat mental illness. He could walk through the streets of his patient's mind without the verbal filter of analysis. It might even be possible to make changes in the landscape to effect a cure. The demons lurking in the shadows would be a constant danger, 'You might not come back'.

Report #31

I quickly passed through a dense sea of meticulously aligned energy waves/patterns/conduits of life-force. In the middle of it all, there was a neat cubic 'room' cut out, so I could see a good cross section of the vibes. My sense of 'I', if any remained at this point, was totally shattered as I watched/experienced my own birth, death, the birth of my daughter, and the birth of (I think it will be a boy) my son next August, simultaneously, then flitting back and forth between all these different but connected viewpoints.

After a while, my awareness turned back to my 'real life' body, but I was still watching it from my cosmic observation booth, more than actually 'inhabiting' it. The pipe had drooped in my hand, and I was actually starting to drool! The 'observer' is like: 'look at the body! It's actually *drooling*!' The meat puppet, like a drunk in the gutter, hears this, belches and sneeringly chortles (actually more of a B. and B. 'heh,heh,heh...').

Report #32

It was so fast. As I was inhaling the second hit I was hearing a buzzing tone made up of multiple frequencies. It rose in volume until it was the only thing I could possibly have heard. Layers of overlapping sinusoidal patterns obscured my visual field. I lay back after the second hit, holding my breath. I have a very vague recollection of exhaling. By that time I was zooming hard.

It was sheer chaos. There was an incredible amount of motion and color all around me, seemingly moving at near the speed of light. My mind was completely overwhelmed and I couldn't pay attention to any one thing. It was like going over Niagara Falls in a barrel or being shot out of a cannon. Total sensory overload.

The best way I can think of to describe it was like getting hit by lightning. It was as if a bolt of energy came through the top of my head, blowing me into a million pieces and scattering them to all corners of the universe. Over the next five minutes my being slowly reformed from the whirling chaos it had been reduced to.

My visuals were a jumbled mixture of fantasies, memories and things from the room mixed with strange geometric forms. I don't remember most of what I saw, as it was simply too damn fast. I didn't see any elves or entities, but there was a definite sense of 'other' there. It felt like it was waiting for me, watching and possibly even interacting with me on some level. According to my sitter, my eyes were alternating between open and closed during the 'trance' part of the experience, but I couldn't discern any difference that I recall.

Report #33

Instantly the entire physical third dimension disappeared, and what was left was a state of consciousness unlike any other experience. Oils of reddish and brownish hues moved in every direction at the same time in my entire field of vision. Then after an orientaton period (no more than a few seconds, I'm sure) a hole the diameter of a basketball opened up in the middle of this untitled hallucinatory picture. In the center of this hole, was the chunk of rose quartz suspended right in front of my headm or at least where my head should have been, physically speaking of course! I then saw something that looked like the consistency of honey, maybe a little runnier, being poured in through the top of the crystal. This substance had a bright orange-yellow glow to it. When the crystal was full, the fluid began to pulse, not like a heartbeat, but more like a throb. With every beat, I could see millions upon millions of microscopic strands of light pulse from the liquid, and find their way to the outer edge of the rock, whereupon they would refract in an infinite number of directions from the uncut stone. I actually felt them cascading over my face and body as they erupted from within.

Report #34 — entities

No words I could come up with could describe the trip I had.

I immediately arrived in the DMT ROOM as it was later described to me, where I was confronted with a host of spirits, who cheered a valient roar as I surfaced into the dark cave from water-like lava, 'You've made it, they roared'. They taunted me and delivered an intense series of energy rushes thoughout my body, or my spirit you could say, since I was more like an energy form than a body. (I can't explain.)

Suddenly I realized that I still was holding my breath, and the longer I held it the better the rush felt, and the more intense the vision became until, I realized that even though it felt good, I would probably die if I didn't breath soon. At that point, I was thrown onto an altar by a swarm of pracilitizing evil spirts and confronted with a choice. The master held a sword, and the others held me down with my neck falling back. He said, "If you allow me to cut off your head, you can't imagine the knowledge you will gain, and the rush you will feel, even more than this sample you've had."

At that point I realized where I was, and even though it felt incredible, somthing inside me yelled out NO! Then I gasped for air, and took my first breath. (I don't know how long this was, but it seemed like hours.) Instantly, I felt a warm ooze surround me and pull me from the altar shooting me like a rocket to the most peacful beautiful place I had ever seen. As I looked around, I saw what I believe to be my guardian angel smile at me as he was wrapped around me taking me to this beautiful place. The music was beautiful, everything was incredible.

Then I felt another rush of beauty, and was told I had transcended the darkness within me. Almost like I passed a test or something.

Report #35

It was mostly intense flashes of solid pure colours — no pastels or hues, just wham! I described it to Ronny as like being inside a cyber-simulation like 'The lawnmower man', only it had crashed and was throwing garbage at me from all directions.

Report #36

The effects were almost immediate as I sat back on the ground with my eyes closed. The flowing patterned light started and this time the patterns were much more solid with more complexity and intricate designs like an Indian tapestry.

The rushing walls of designs and patterns flowed through me and they had much more intensity than previously. I gripped my knees as I sat on the ground trying to stabilize the cascading intensity of the vision. Sundance said the experience lasted about 6 to 7 minutes and during that time I was immersed in a world of light and color with three-dimensional designs that were the best I had ever seen.

What was interesting was that I had seemed to break through to the visionary place, but only colored lights in amazing complexity occurred. The visions had not come to me. Was it because I had not stared at the picture long enough, or was it a different DMT “place” I had gotten too? This was by far the most intense experiment that I had done and it was like riding a roller coaster through a fractal. As the trip was winding down I tried to concentrate on the designs as they flowed by and through me to check out the complexities. As one of the more interesting designs flowed by I focused on a circular design that morphed as I focused on it into an eye with a grinning mouth below it. The smile seemed more maniacal than friendly, but was never less an amazing sight.

Report #37

As my body disappeared I began to see dim colors in geometric patterns on the 'walls' around me, in a tunnel shape. I was moving at warp speed through this 'wormhole' bobbing and weaving in the space that is my mind, as the colors and patterns became brighter and brighter and began to move in a fractalized glow. The only thoughts I was able to have at this point were just total shock and awe at what I was experiencing, which would not leave through the trip. But it was paralyzing for the first 10 seconds or so though it seemed longer. I'll put $100 that my jaw was on the ground.

I was beginning to slow down now but still felt the rushing energy through me. At this point I tried to open my eyes. Everything was veeerry strange and moving in a manner so I could barely make out any objects, and it was hard to look at, even a little frightening.

I became aware that my head and arms were dancing and waving around with the energy I felt and it was starting to bother the people on either side of me, so I managed to say, in a very strange voice, 'I'm going for a walk.' I stumbled to my feet with my eyes closed again and emerged into the light.

My first few steps were awkward but it came to me quickly. Seeing nothing but green behind my eyes I felt I was at the end of the tunnel. The initial rush was over but I was still in awe. I opened my eyes, and nothing could prepare me for what I saw. There was no solid matter, only complete, colorful, chaos. The shapes of objects were all there but in the form of bright dancing ... the word just hit me like it was whispered in my ear, 'ENERGY.'

Report #38 — entities

That swirling, kaliedoscopic thing I've read about encompassing my mind, eyes closed, but not how I thought it would be — not the colors of visible light but a neutral and very pleasant purplish, pink, grey, and the spirals or fractals are amazing, not prism-like like I had assumed but much more symmetrical to a degree, coming out of all planes, perhaps moving to that buzzing but I'm not clear about this. So what, something interesting to see right?

Then comes this sort of feeling, nobody telling me anything, no presence or anything, but as if the whole fractal-type of being was the being itself. And I'm hearing no, seeing no, sensing, really sensing that 'it's okay, lets go, doesn't this seem natural, I'm here, I'll take care of you...', a grandfatherly 'figure' all encompassing telling me how it is. And that is, that to continue forward is the right and natural thing to do. Then I realize that off in the distance, though not distance becasue this 'space' I'm in, doesn't seem to have any depth to it, though it surely must because I'm way on one side of it and this 'door' for lack of a better word is out there in the distance. 'He's' saying 'lets go, it's good, it's alright...' ABSOLUTELY the most love and caring and safety I've felt in a long time. The 'grandfatherliness' was worth the experience in and of itself — such love and caring, like driving in a car when you're six and you only know that getting from point A to point B is the endpoint — getting there is no trouble. IT WILL HAPPEN. the driver is take-care-ofer. Somebody is there, I think, maybe only in the DMT world, possibly always; somebody is willing and ready and whose big purpose (by no means only purpose) is to help you ... progress?

Things are sticky here. I know that I din't have enought of a dose, or perhaps wasn't myself willing to go further. but there was without a doubt something a bit further off in the distance, away from my reach because: not enough drug, fear, protector or whoever feels not yet...... who knows.

Report #39

i had the good fortune of being turned on by someone that I trust. it tasted like I was smoking plastic — very strange. Very quickly the trees outside began moving around wildly, as if I could suddenly see some type of animism, things kinda melted — I wasn't driving, had little control as soon as I started to worry, it started to fade away, then was gone (time for more).

There was something dark about it that bothered me a great deal, mostly in a vague, can't put my finger on it. I know this sounds funny, but it felt like I was tapping into the dark side of the force (metaphor, not literal).

All in all a very interesting experience, not for the faint-at -heart or those who fear being out of direct control.

Report #40 — entities

I closed my eyes and was immediately face to face with a supreme being of sorts. It had no face, and its form was like a string of multicoloured lights constantly morphing; like a clown making a series of balloon animals, beginning with a dog, he alters a couple of parts, holds it differently to reveal a dolphin, and so on. It was certainly a living presence, and without a face it was still somehow staring eye to eye with me as though it knew everything about my entire life. There was no sense of emotional attachment, but there was definite supra-linguistic communication happening. This being and I were travelling at great speed through an infinite stretch of deep space — I was chasing it. It stayed the same distance away from me the whole time and seemed to be at ease with the speed, while I was struggling to keep up. It was as though it wanted me there, but not yet, not in this way. It was telling me to come back when I could keep up with it, when I could catch up and pass straight through it.

Fifteen minutes later, and the second attempt was around twice the dose of the first, and began just the same, the visual environment became kind of fuzzy and my body seemed to spaghettify just slightly. But within seconds of this there was a distinct difference. I had only heard this described in other people’s accounts once, I think, and I had totally forgotten about the possibility of it happening until it actually happened to me.

Just after I released the toke, I looked around to see what was happening to my senses as I was coming up — when the entire universe began to buzz. It was like a deep bass feedback loop that you sometimes hear in electronic music, like the humming noise of flying saucers in movies, very electronic and computer-like, but unbelievably real and right there — all around me. I immediately thought that the DMT had unlocked a whole new realm of sound that we don’t normally hear — a background kind of sound that would distract our ears from 'normal' functioning — the sound that matter makes. I’ve perceived the vibrations of matter and subatomic particles on other trips, mushrooms, acid, and once or twice even on the old hooch, but now with DMT it was a totally audible reality. And more than just audible, this sharp bassy hum that was coming out of everything made everything vibrate, including myself and my sitter next to me. It was so intense and pervasive that I had to close my eyes to escape the motion sickness of this vibrating mass of existence.

When I did, the buzz began to mutate and break up into all these telephonic/electronic modem-like noises, like a kaleidoscope of sound. The sounds built and built, reaching a peak that culminated in a vortex which sucked everything in existence, the buzzing, the environment around me, and my entire being into a totally foreign dimension: and there I was with total silence.

The buzzing was gone, and I was in a room looking at a wall. The wall was like a complex scaffold of constantly morphing angular prisms shimmering with colours that are completely beyond the descriptions of any language, and totally awe-inspiring. I felt an uncontrollable smile grow across my face — reality-check — but I kept watching. I immediately noticed that there was something more than just the wall. I noticed at first there was something in the wall, popping out occasionally to show me it was there, it wanted me to recognise it before it would fully come out though. It was something like watching the flat surface of a calm beach and seeing a dolphin periodically break the surface for air. When I recognised that there was definitely something living swimming through this scaffold of unbelievable shapes and colours, it came out. It was a non-human female being flying around this hyper-dimensional ‘room’. She wore a flowing cape or gown that streamed directly off a big round glowing face, the kind of face that a 3-year-old kid draws — a circle with dots for eyes and a curved line for a mouth.

That’s all there was of her. But her face was so alive, compassionate, and enlightened. She was so happy when I realised she was there. Then I watched as a pedestal literally grew out of the floor of this ‘room’, made of the same unearthly super-brilliant scaffolding. My attention must have been distracted by this thing growing out of the ground because the female being got in my face and communicated to me (not in words) “look at what’s ON the pedestal!” I looked up and saw a diamond shaped object that was made of similar stuff to the walls — but infinitely more brilliant, more dazzling, more unspeakably awesome. And as my smile grew and total awe and amazement filled me, this female being began flying around the object at great speed, keeping her eyes fixed on me. She was doing flips and sharp turns and cheering as though she was celebrating the fact that she had the chance to show me. She kept communicating to me, “Look at it! Look at it! Isn’t this awesome?!” This continued, and I kept my eyes on that unbelievable object as the scene began to fade.

Report #41

I visually witnessed the room disappearing like an evanescent footprint on the sand slowly being washed away by the tide. Then there was total and immense darkness. And as though I was propelled by some inexplicable force, my body was rocketed forward in a horizontal motion faster than anything I could comprehend. Swirls of light danced around me and I saw particles of matter all around exploding into multicolored fragments. The terror I initally experienced was unfathomable. I felt like I was dying and that I had no control whatsoever. And at once, I surrendered to this death and in a sense celebrated it. As soon as I did this I saw a strange multi-limbed entity approach me on my left, swooping in and craddling my body as though I was an infant. It did not speak nor do I remember anything other than it had many arms. It was very warm and non-threatening and it spoke to me with its touch and nothing more. Its presence was extremely nurturing and it smiled with such seraphic peace and benediction.

The particles of light exploding around me, soft mercurial waves of color enveloping me and draping me with care, muslin arms holding me gently, the universe expanding and contracting, angels dancing on effervescent stars, galaxies of light, sounds of butterfly wings burning, tendril tongues leaping like flames form a campfire, all derivations of geometrical patterns making reasonable the irrational.

Dewdrops slipping off of buttercups, a warm desert breeze, a cactus field of great saguaros and ox tongues swaying gently as sheets of stars pass above, careening archetypes appearing and disappearing in front of me: a Pirandellonian clown, a giant black horse with a honey-colored mane, an archer with an inviting grin, ferries with dragonfly wings, a wizard with soft spoken eyes, a lascivious young siren licking my chest with a long slippery buttermilk tongue, a bengalian tiger with piercing luminescent eyes, an old man laughing, a young girl crying, an Indian inside a pueblo praying over a dying boy bleeding through his nostrils, a daft man on rollerskates, and a crone in a purple shroud reaching her old withered hand to me...the whole of humanity dancing naked amongst the gods and godessess of the storm. These images passed by me so fast yet each intricate contour of their bodies I remember so clearly. This lasted for what seemed hours and I calmly resigned myself to the incomprehensibly beautifully changing aspect of the universe.

The world runs by rhythms we can’t possibly comprehend, and to make peace with that is the essence of being human. This I felt like no other time in my life. No other experience was remotely close to this. And the whole time this presence or perhaps God, the Great Spirit was holding me in the warmest of embrace. And slowly it brought me back to my corporeal existence in the room on the couch, so gracefully and elegantly. My body felt like a lithe dandelion floating effortlessly back to the ground. I began laughing joyfully at the unbelievable nature of my experience. I felt like I now possessed an uncanny wisdom so powerful and so essential to my being that I retained a wondeful sense of self-confidence and peace. And as I opened my eyes I saw the room as it once was before. There were strange geometrical patterns all around, yet I knew that I was back from wherever I went. My friends were there, smiling. I thought my god, how long were they there? How could they have waited with me so long, so reserved and peaceful? Hours had passed, so I thought.

Report #42 — entities

... I'm well into the trip, with lots of strange beings and one of them approaches me, looking like an ugly English football hooligan. He turns around and exposes his bare behind, and looks at me in a hostile way and I get the impression he is saying, "Kiss my arse!" So I'm thinking, "Well, should I kiss his arse?", and then he disappears ...

Report #43

I held the smoke in for around 10 seconds when, at that time, an immensely different mode of consciousness fully and completely enveloped me in such an acute and abrupt manner that it was as if I had been launched at light speed into an altogether alien dimension, complete with utter time distortion and, around 20 to 30 seconds later, incredibly ornate and detailed full-blown hallucinations. The visual world that engulfed me consisted of nothing less than the most beautiful sights I had ever seen. It was a wholly awesome world that was bizarre, beautiful, captivating, and infinitely intricate. The unifying characteristic behind all of the hallucinations seems to have been that they were all sharp, angular, geometric forms that stood in stark contrast to the organic and dream-like visions of a mushroom experience. Nothing within my visual field remained unchanged. The experience was not dreamy or slow, although significant time dilation did occur. Instead, the lucidity of the trip was altered in such a way that the consistency and flow of normal consciousness was completely transformed beyond recognition. I remember thinking at once that I would never be able to comprehend this experience completely after its effects had fully diminished.

Report #44

There appeared in the vastness a tiny point of light. I remember realizing that I had not died at all, but that I had been dead. Then, not dead, but dormant. DORMANT. I was about to be born.

The feeling of flying is not an accurate description of the sensation that accompanied my movement toward the point, which was gold, and, to my surprise, was actually metallic. I came immediately upon the source, which was a DNA scarab, a construct, an insect of impossible dimensions, miles in diameter and circumference.

The skin of the carapace was polished to a high sheen and thin to the point of transparency. I could see tiny, endless arrangements of gears and pinions just beneath the gold wing, tiny points of alien light darted from what were molecular points of cognitive energy, impossible in color and detail, billions and billions of precision gears meshing quietly and generating consciousness, which was traversing a planned route, terrifying in its complexity, but beautiful in its exactitude.

I followed a point, there was warmth, to the top of the scarab's enormous body. It had a tiny human head, the size of a marble, attached via a series of DNA strands that had been transformed into a clear metal. The head was unaware of my presence and it had a small mouth, which opened to speak.

From the mouth came forth the matured beam of thought, which had started from a cog (Cognitive) in the belly of the insect, years ago, and had grown as it rose to the head, morphing into a form of concentrated phosphene light. the beam poured from the tiny mouth, and became stacatto at once, and conical, in sections that grew, as ideas, and hypnotized me into allowing myself to be enveloped by a punctuated green, now a geometry of raw cognition without ego, and with a destination.

I rode in the singular idea, aware of its purity and clarity, and above all, its sense of purpose, as it was not aware of my presence, and fell to a violet montage of heads which were dislocated and ethereal, but awaiting its arrival.

Report #45

A few seconds later the visual distortions began. Everything became fluid and danced with an enchanting energy — utterly bewitching. Interestingly (and unexpectedly) I noticed many parallels with 2CB including a peculiar effect I experience when perceiving 3D space that is very difficult to explain. The effects where still building fast and I began to see within this 3D space the chrysanthemum pattern associated with DMT. It was very beautiful — crystalline and colourful. At this point I began to hear a wonderful celestial chiming/ringing/singing that seemed to be calling me or was at least directed towards me. I also perceived a very strong presence that to me was a latticework of many things — too many to remember, but my Mum and Dad (or archetypal parents?) where a prominent element of this lattice and I began to feel that this was a perception of all divine possibility. As I contemplated this, the effects began to subside and I began to whisper thank you again and again — I was completely euphoric.

Report #46 — entities

... so I took more. That's when I blasted off.

I barely had time to put down the pipe. The waves of energy in my body got so intense, I knew I had to ground them out...so I fell off the chair to the floor...very controlled fall, I was in control of it...my friend, S., was worried but I managed to let him know I was OK.

I'm on the floor by this point, sighing and moaning then laughing. I was unaware of the room. the patterns behind my closed eyes were incredibly intricate and beautiful.... concentric circles turning in alternate directions filled with shifting, multi-coloured, serpentine patterns.

Then four elf-like clowns appeared out of the space in the floor. All of them were really friendly. One of these clowns was a pretty majorette dressed in a blue, soldier/nutcracker-like kinda uniform...with big red circles painted on her cheeks and a big, beautiful smile. She had a bag of candy and she was offering it to me. They all seemed to be offering gifts, I felt like they would have given me anything I ever wanted...but this nymph with the candy was extremely appealing...

I saw the 'candy' (symbolic, I'm sure) and the yellow one looked really bright and colourful...but just as I was about to take it... I had an overwhelming feeling of not being worthy to accept what they offered. I felt like I didn't deserve it...wasn't good enough.....so I refused the gift. She became a little snarky and said sarcastically 'Oh, of course, why would you want some of this?' The scene changed to black and white and she took the candy away. I felt insects crawling on me and still felt like I had no business being with these beautiful,BEAUTIFUL beings. The feeling was mine. They were trying to convince me I was worthy, That it was OK to accept the gifts. I felt worthless and guilty that I may have offended by refusing the offer. That's when I said... 'too much'.

I put a cap on it. I limited the experience. I felt I could have gone MUCH deeper if I could have let go. I tried to come back to Earth...tried to stand. I had no balance and my eyes were still closed...but I could see the room and knew where everything was...S. said he wondered to himself how I was doing it...I would stumble and almost crash into the desk, but then I would shift myself at the last minute and grab onto the thing...all with my eyes closed. Subjectively...It wasn't quite like seeing...it was like sensing everything in my proximity so well that I had a perfect mental image of my surroundings...kinda like the superhero Daredevil.

Then I noticed the beings again. They were still right there....with outstretched arms, as if to catch me if I fell...they looked like glowing blue, humanoid shapes at this point, they didn't seem to have clearly defined features. They gestured to my chair, so I made my way over and sat down again.

Now a different one was communicating with me...I had the impression that he was the 'ringmaster' of this crazy clown circus. the others were still there, especially the majorette. She was stroking my face and soothing me, sending me healing energy. They wanted me to know that I was beautiful and they loved me and wanted to help me and I was entitled to everything I ever wanted, I just had to accept it. They were full of such incredible love...I started to cry. I still get really emotional thinking about it. Finally I said 'OK' and the waves of love just washed over me and I felt incredible.

It was crazy...the ringmaster was sitting on my desk talking with me, and the whole time the others were sending me healing, soothing me...I felt like a little kid. I was talking back...saying..'I know, I know...you're right.' The beings were just laying it on the table..like...'here it is...It's what you came for, isn't it?' They told me that they are everywhere all the time and I am never alone.

After the 'lesson', I asked if I could go now, and I made my way back to 'reality?'... I still felt like I was on the wackiest acid trip ever. This lasted for another 10-15 minutes, during which time I alternated between uncontrollable sobbing and euphoric laughter as I tried to make sense out of the experience.

Report #47 — entities

After two hits, nothing. Third hit, I lay back on the pillow and the curtains opened to a highly geometrical brightly colored scene. I was greeted by a girl-pattern (ponytailed, cheerleader-skirted, Picassoesque hostess type thing) that started off the show, cocking her head and posing her limbs at a jaunty angle as she pointed one way, looking at me — it almost looked like she winked.

(Going into it, I reminded myself of Terence’s admonishment to not get stuck in amazement and to not be afraid)

I wasn’t afraid, but I did see glimpses of scary hobgoblin faces, grotesques (all in this whimsical geometric way) and felt like there were places where more of them could be, but it was generally like a wacky toy factory. Gadgets, widgets, twirling machines, stair-step pattern, Escher-like “space” and tunnels and chutes. The beings would seem to go “look!” and I felt I was supposed to look. I don’t know whether my eyes did it, but I felt my consciousness would just pivot 90 degrees and propel to the right and left and the “landscape” would go on just as far in that direction. I would also “look” up and “whoosh” towards stuff “up there”. It was like opening a bunch of doors to witness frenetic activity that was always there even when I wasn’t looking. There seemed to be an infinite number of interdimensional spaces to explore, and no symmetry.

“They” seemed to be “whispering” in a soft, intimate way to me. Not to “Samanthe” [I have no idea what I meant by that]. I didn’t feel my body, but I did catch myself trying to struggle to “remember” the Observer. I couldn’t remember it very well and felt a little confused when I tried — I felt a sense of familiarity at that trying-to-get-my-bearings.

The familiarity was kind of like that infinite return to the now and infinity, the circling cycling merry go round sensation I get from nitrous oxide. I vaguely felt that someone had done something to me that maybe I might start to feel panic about, but it didn’t actually happen. [I learned later that one of my sitters sensed I was approaching a fear space, so he grounded me by doing energy work on my heart chakra, for the chakra-inclined in the audience.] I felt briefly a mild paranoia and a stuck-in-infinity sense, like I was lost in a labyrinth with no way out.

Report #48

I weakly take a second toke, probably half the size of the first one. Looking at Z, I see that he's losing more resolution fast, but becoming VERY colorful and almost geometric, like stained glass. I don't remember exhaling at this point, but obviously I must have.

I fell back onto the bed at this point, my head in D's lap. The world is gone. The popping sound abruptly stops and I am launched through the multiplex at the speed of light, shooting through a vortex, a bit like a black hole, except the vortex is brilliantly colored, again in a pulsing geometric type way. It seems that I'm in this vortex for an eternity. Also, I feel a LOT of fear right now, like my soul is leaving my body and is being taken somewhere else. I remember having a vague notion of 'Oh no, I've overdosed, I certainly can't live through this now.' Time has become meaningless, quick but forever. This is the most alien thing I have ever felt.

All of a sudden the travel stops, or maybe I just got through the vortex and was travelling through open blackness, but there was no point of reference to guage movement. I'm in the middle of something... Or maybe something is in the middle of me? Throughout the blackness I hear giggling, like children giggling. I can't see them though. But for some reason my fear subsides at this point, I become curious. I want to find the source of the giggling, but can't even imagine how to begin searching. Just then I feel the presence of something, or several somethings. The gigglers?

Report #49 — entities

Having smoked the DMT in two hits, I lay back and barely had time to close my eyes as an immensely coherent visual trip began.

To start with I was travelling into what looked like a long curved tunnel. The walls of the tunnel were like bright multicolored tiles — pinks, greens and blues especially.

After an indeterminate period of time I found myself in a garden, which seemed to be suspended in a sky-blue void, rather than part of any larger land mass.

The garden had grass, flowers, trees, even a picket fence and seemed quite convincing and solid. I noticed two 'faeries' sitting on a swing hanging from one of the trees. They seemed to be inviting me closer, and I floated in their direction (didn't feel like I had my body with me).

As I approached them I noticed that they were lewdly playing with themselves and each other, I watched them for some time before noticing that there were more inhabitants in the gar