Oxford's unusual exorcise – Kassam Stadium, 2001

When Oxford United moved to their new stadium they suffered a run of indifferent home form. In such circumstances most clubs would have fired the coach or bought new players. Oxford took a different route, bringing in the Bishop of Oxford to say a prayer of exorcism in the centre-circle. "It is better to be safe than sorry," said the club chaplain, plainly fearing what effect the sight of then team manager Mark Wright vomiting green slime and muttering obscenities would have on team morale. HP

Osgood's fashion disaster – Mitcham, London, 1970s

Footballers traditionally have a poor record when opening boutiques. None were poorer than Peter Osgood, whose attempt to give the fashion industry in Mitcham a shot in the arm "closed after 18 months due to lack of interest, especially mine". From the start the project had lacked impetus, as Osgood admits: "I did a friend a favour. He lived there and had nothing to do and wanted the adventure." WB

Pickles saves the world – South Norwood, London, 1966

Four months before the start of the 1966 World Cup, the Jules Rimet Trophy was put on display at an exhibition of rare postage stamps in Westminster's Central Hall. One day after the exhibition opened, the display cabinet housing it was found open and empty - the cup had been stolen. The police efforts to recover the trophy were hilariously inept - a Detective Inspector Charles Buggy of the Flying Squad apprehended a petty thief called Jackson, but found he had nothing to do with it - but happily a week later a dog called Pickles sniffed it out from under a bush in South Norwood. Pickles went on to star in a sub-Ealing comedy, before choking himself to death with his own lead in 1971 while chasing a cat. SM

Sonny Pike goes to Amsterdam – Ajax, 1990

Hundreds of sportsmen are prematurely anointed as the next so-and-so. This is just about understandable, if still irresponsible, when players are in their teens, but the heartbreaking case of Sonny Pike was a little different. He was just seven when he signed for Ajax, and prompted comparisons with the likes of George Best and Diego Maradona. It was all too much for Pike, who eventually suffered a nervous breakdown at the age of 16. "I couldn't take it, and I got ill, really screwed up," he said. "Looking back, it's amazing how low I was. Ajax completely forgot about me; they didn't want to know." He decided to quit professional football and was last heard of studying psychology at Dundee University. RS

Pistone gets a sheep's heart – Newcastle, 1998

Secret Santa theoretically provides an opportunity to get a colleague an ingenious Christmas gift (or spend as little as possible safe in the knowledge that they won't know you are the skinflint). But in 1998, Newcastle's footballers took it as an opportunity to tell other members of the squad what they really thought of them. Especially those pesky foreigners. The Italian full-back Alessandro Pistone was given a sheep's heart, as a sign of his perceived commitment, or lack thereof. Duncan Ferguson, who had done time in 1995, was given a prison shirt. And Dietmar Hamann - he's German, you see - unwrapped a copy of Mein Kampf. Suddenly a deodorant set from Superdrug didn't seem so bad. RS

Prince stops play – Kuwait, 1982

There are millions of playground examples of teams refusing to accept the validity of an opponent's goal and walking off in a huff, but the World Cup is supposed to be a slightly more mature affair. It wasn't during the France v Kuwait match of 1982. France had apparently gone 4-1 ahead late in the game through Alain Giresse, but the Kuwait players complained that they had stopped playing because they heard a whistle. This led to a complete farce in which Prince Fahid Al-Ahmad Al-Sabah, the president of the Kuwait FA, came on to the field and demanded the goal be disallowed. When that failed he told the players to walk off the field; suddenly the Russian referee Miroslav Stupar relented and disallowed the goal. The striking thing about this is how utterly pointless it was: with only 10 minutes left and France palpably superior, Kuwait had absolutely no chance of a comeback, and France scored another a few minutes later. Stupar never refereed another World Cup game, while the Prince was fined some loose change: $15,000. RS

Re Cecconi's tragic end – Rome, 1978

Luciano Re Cecconi - nicknamed the Blond Angel - was an integral part of Lazio's first-ever Serie A title-winning side in 1974. The dashing box-to-box midfielder would tragically meet his maker four years later, in the most farcical of circumstances. Walking into a Rome jewellery shop with two friends, he decided to play a practical joke. "Stop!" he screamed. "This is a robbery!" The jeweller, who had his back to the shop, spun round and shot him. "It's a joke, it's a joke," gasped Re Cecconi. Within 30 minutes he was dead. SM

Red Star play for penalties – Bari, 1991

It's such a shame that the 1991 European Cup final has gone down in history as arguably the dullest ever - because eventual champions Red Star Belgrade were one of the greatest teams ever to win the trophy. Boasting the likes of Robert Prosinecki, Dejan Savicevic and Sinisa Mihaijlovic, Red Star knocked out a decent Rangers side in the second round. When Walter Smith was sent by Graeme Souness to scout them before the match, he came back with the two-word report: "We're fucked." Red Star then bested Bayern Munich 4-3 in a semi-final tie which, given the amount of chances created by both sides, resembled a basketball game. The final, against an exciting Marseille side containing Chris Waddle and Jean-Pierre Papin, was almost certainly going to be a let-down - and it was, Marseille freezing and Red Star playing for penalties from the off, leaving star man Darko Pancev stranded upfield. It made for eye-bleedingly tedious fare - as if Red Star cared as they lifted the cup. SM

Ref Rego blows up early – Montevideo, 1930

France were up against it from the off in the first-ever World Cup in 1930. They took more than two weeks to get to Uruguay by boat, then were asked to play in one of the tournament's concurrently held opening matches. They started well, Lucien Laurent scoring the first-ever World Cup goal on 19 minutes in a 4-1 win over Mexico, but were then asked to play their second match two days later against tournament favourites Argentina. Outplayed, they held on staunchly for 81 minutes before conceding - then, when on the attack three minutes later, were stopped in their tracks by referee Gilberto de Almeida Rego's final whistle. It's unlikely his decision to blow up on 84 minutes was anything other than inept - he was Brazilian after all - but it sucked the life out of France, who were forced to argue vociferously to get the last six minutes of the match played, then failed to pick themselves up after the restart. Chile beat them 1-0 four days later, and they were sent on the long journey back home. SM

Richards swears on it - Villa Park, 2006

Manchester City's 17-year-old defender Micah Richards had just scored a deserved last-minute equaliser at Aston Villa on his fourth first-team appearance to take the tie to a replay. With his adrenalin still pumping, he was interviewed by Garth Crooks in the tunnel live on BBC1.

GC: "Well Micah, an extraordinary finish. What did you make of it?"

MR: "Oh, it was just great to be out there ... [looks up to the ceiling, a broad smile on his face as he catches his breath] fuck yeah, you know ... I just can't believe it. One minute we were 1-0 down then, last minute, we got the goal. So there's not much more I can ask for, really."

GC: "Well, you're a young lad and we can understand your excitement, but this is going out to a national audience so be careful what you say ..." DF

Lazy Andy Ritchie – Greenock Morton, 1976-83

Perhaps the ultimate lazy genius was Andy Ritchie of unfashionable Greenock Morton. Having already blown his chance at Celtic, Ritchie became a legend at Morton, famed for his ability as much as his lethargy, he was affectionately called the Idle Idol and fans believed he was as good as any Scotland international. One of his greatest goals came against Dundee United. It was described thus in the book Greenock Morton 1874-1999: "Big Andy was standing at the centre circle, hands inside his shirt sleeves, looking at the seagulls, bored out of his skull, when Davie Hayes blootered the ball out. It was just Andy and Paul Hegarty. Andy, you couldn't slip a copy of the Greenock Telegraph under his feet when he jumped. Hegarty jumped and missed and Ritchie did what Pelé couldn't and volleyed the ball past Hamish from the half-way line!" Ritchie described himself as a "sick pup" in a recent interview. "I really needed someone to have some faith in me, but I was 26 and ended up taking a non-football job in London and gave up." GR

Rush's decline – Sunderland, 1992-99

At the age of 20, David Rush played for Sunderland in an FA Cup final. By 27 he was playing Sunday league for Hylton Castle Arms. Accused of driving after having his licence suspended, the then Hartlepool United forward explained to an unsympathetic judge that he couldn't use public transport because if he did he'd be mobbed. During his time at Oxford, fans would chant "When he has a pint, he has a fight, David, David Rush." JW

Rush misquoted – Turin, 1987-88

Ian Rush's solitary year in Turin playing for Juventus has become notorious for his failure to adapt to the Italian way of life. The gaucheness of the Welshman was summed up by his pithy explanation on his return to Anfield a year later. "I couldn't settle in Italy," he was reported to have said. "It was like living in a foreign country." There's only one problem with the story - he never said it. It was a joke uttered by Kenny Dalglish at the homecoming press conference and the phrase was stuffed into Rush's mouth to paint a picture of a parochial ingénue who struggled among continental sophisticates. To Rush's chagrin it has continued to appear in all the best lexicons of quotations, a lazy urban myth that takes precedence over the facts. RB

St Mirren sack Fergie – Paisley, 1978

Sir Alex Ferguson has won 10 league titles, five FA Cups, four Scottish Cups, six European trophies - but he has only been sacked once. It seems fair to assume that he won't be adding to that tally before his retirement. So the then St Mirren chairman, Willie Todd, will forever hold the distinction of being the only man to give the boot to perhaps the greatest manager in the history of British football, though as he told the Guardian last year it was not because he didn't consider the master tactician good enough, but because he was about to leave anyway. "I knew perfectly well that he had told all the staff he was moving to Aberdeen ... it was a clear breach of contract." Still, it's one hell of a boast. RS