Well Harry here with a report from MILO on THE PHANTOM MENACE. For those that don't know who MILO is, he's that Phantom Tollbooth character that let me read his copy of the script in London a while back. So I know MILO knows of what he speaks. Just so you know this report has spoilers, and the spoilers are absolutely true so don't read if you don't want to know. Ok? Here's the countdown...

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Harry,

Long time no chat. I've been busy searching for some sort of Superman present for a close friend of mine, any suggestions? Well anyway I suppose you want a report of some sort to spread to the masses. Before I get to that, let me say that everything I type in is absolutely true as far as the 3rd draft and what I saw on set.

Everybody seems pretty concerned about the character of Jar Jar Binks, pronounced Ja Ja Binksss. The toy of him we've seen on the net looks kinda lame, but as you can see from the Doug Chiang sketch below, he's a bit better looking with a cool skin texture and everything. This is a nude pic of him though, he does wear clothes as do every Gungan in the film. (I'll send a pic next time.)

We meet Jar Jar in the swamps of Naboo. Qui-Gon runs into him and saves his life. Next thing Qui-Gon knows he's stuck with this creature because of the life debt Jar Jar owes him. Obi Wan doesn't care too much for the character because he's a bit of a nuissance, but Qui-Gon keeps around because he believes Jar Jar has a purpose to serve.

Jar Jar is very much the Chewbacca with dialogue of the film. And Jar Jar's dialogue is written quite strangely in a funny accent. His tongue can shoot out and grab stuff, and I'd go so far as to say he's a bit like C3PO too. He's always negative about the current situation. I'm sure Ben Burtt will be adding sound effects and doing quite a mixing job with his voice.

Jar Jar pilots a submarine through the core of the planet, and is seemingly clumsy, but his clumsiness always saves the characters. Imagine Jerry Lewis with the force. Well that's enough this time out Harry. Next time I'll fill you in with more. I have easy access to a computer now, so I can send you more and more reports. I hope you and the fans like.