Connie Berchem

GUEST COLUMNIST

I’m an athlete. I sail boats, I race boats in competition and through the years I’ve had the opportunity to have an Olympic campaign, raced for the U.S. Sailing Offshore Championship, the North Carolina Governor’s Cup and, this year, brought the U.S Jet 14 Women’s National Championship’s back to N.C.

I am also transgender, putting our victory this year in stark contrast to the heartbreaking consequences of the passage of House Bill 2.

I’ve lived in the shadows for years. Nobody knew this for way too long. But I was so proud when my daughter recently took to the streets of Washington, D.C. to march for me, that I feel it’s now my time to stand up to make a difference.

Last spring I raced at the Southern Comfort Regatta at Lake Julian, where boats came from all over the country to compete. While we were waiting for our instructions someone shouted “What bathrooms do we use?”

I felt sad and angry that this had happened at a sailing event. But it was being held on government park property. Then at the Nationals this summer, there were seven boats from North Carolina, more than any other district, at Galesville, Maryland. Someone yelled “let’s see the N.C. birth certificates” and the crowd laughed.

This bill had made a laughingstock of all North Carolina residents. After winning the Women’s Nationals, it felt like a hollow victory. I spent most of it embarrassed, wondering if I would be scrutinized. How would my fellow competitors treat me now if they knew? I was so concerned going in front of everyone to accept our trophy, I actually turned to my fellow crew member and asked her to go by herself.

In our moment of victory, I wasn’t celebrating. I was afraid.

Now I continually look over my shoulder. I trust no one. I have endured brutal beatings over the years resulting in six concussions and four skull fractures from intolerant individuals, all before the age of 15. I was so proud when my daughter said she was marching for me at the Washington march, and it was that moment when I decided that I need to fight for myself and for other transgender people.

I’m used to being bullied and beaten. I’m going to do my best to try to prevent others from having that fate.

I emailed more than 170 lawmakers this year to share my experience. One response I received, from District 55 Rep. Mark Brody, was particularly disturbing, but illuminating.

“I cannot speak professionally but can only repeat what professionals say about what you are going through,” he wrote. “I believe it is called Gender Dysphoria, I hope I got the spelling right, and am saddened by the fact that North Carolina doesn’t provide the help you need to readjust from the mental disorder you suffer with. It appears that allowing you to use a bathroom, locker room or shower of your choice only reenforces the disorder not helps to correct it.”

You see, by making an individual use a bathroom that matches their birth certificate, you are making them a target for retribution. You may as well place a sticker on us for all to see so people will have an easier time identifying transgender individuals. It is for this reason that businesses around this country are placing an economic blockade on our state.

I hear what its supporters say, that they want protection for children from predators. But what I hear is that they don’t want men dressing as women to assault young girls. I’ve never heard it said that they want to protect their sons from women dressed like men.

There is not one incidence of a transgender person assaulting a child in a bathroom on record, but there are real incidences of transgender people being beaten for using a bathroom. Do you really want your daughter being in the bathroom with a transgender man? Or how about your son in the presence of a female transgender woman? This is ridiculous.

While it may have disappeared somewhat from the news, the consequences of HB2 are still very real for many of us.

It’s time for lawmakers to come together, come to their senses, repeal HB2 and regain our economy, create jobs and stop discrimination for all.

Connie Berchem lives in Asheville.