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Loyal fans of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills were understandably ecstatic after the trailer for Season 9 dropped, but there's one person who hasn't seen it yet: Lisa Vanderpump.

"I havent seen the trailer," she revealed in an interview with The Daily Dish podcast. "I won't watch it because it was a very hard time in life this season."

Lisa's only sibling, Mark Vanderpump, passed away earlier in 2018, reportedly at his home in Gloucestershire, England in late April, and the death greatly affected her, she shared. "I've been accused in the past of not showing my emotions. Well, this year was very difficult for me. I struggled; I floundered; I didn't do well after my brother passed. [Husband] Ken [Todd] will attest to that. For me to start taking antidepressants and going to therapy and counseling — grief counseling — I've never been to therapy. I've never taken any drug. But I didn't do well; I was more emotional, I was weaker, and I wasn't as prepared, and I honestly did talk to everybody about coming back to Housewives. I knew I had to bring Tom Tom in and you see me struggle with that emotionally a lot of the time. We were way behind schedule and with Tom Tom opening, I was exhausted and doing Vanderpump Rules, which is such a big show and everything else I had going on. And I was emotional. If I broke my nail, I'd burst into tears. And I think it really took me until about, maybe, October to really try and pull myself together. And for me to reach out for help was something I'd never done either."

She continued, "It was my doctor who just said, you know, sometimes it's OK if you can't cope. I think suicide is something that radiates through the whole family and it was very, very unexpected and very, very difficult to deal with. He's 16 months older than me; I met Ken through him, my only sibling."

Although Lisa is still mourning her brother's death, she says the upcoming season of RHOBH has much to offer. "There is a lot to look forward to on the Housewives as well; there were laughs and good times and I'm sure it's a great show; it's just that I was in a different place," she explained.