Sir -- With reference to Brendan O'Connor's page one article: 'No More Mr (Irish) Nice Guy' (Sunday Independent, September 14, 2008), Mr Paddy, sorry for disappointing you, but, no, not everyone likes you.

As a matter of fact, it is pretty amazing how disliked the Irish are.

Of course, this is not said aloud as it is not politically correct. (French and German are the only two nationalities one can hate openly). Anyway as I was saying, keep dreaming.

The great craic: where, when, how, who?

Did I miss anything these last 30-odd years? I never see any craic with the Paddies. I agree, you sincerely believe you've got it, but noooooooo, wrong again. Only when you're binge-drinking do you dare open your mouth. And then, it is to talk total rubbish. You are loud, that's for sure. Well, one is Irish, so, one must pretend to be enjoying oneself. The usual topic is -- God, we are great!!!! Everybody loves us. (Please God, let it be true!).

Your accent? Well, first of all, like in any country, there are different accents. But again, no, no, no, no -- the Irish accent is vile! Last month, I was in Ireland for a week. As soon as I arrived in Dublin and was surrounded by that awful noise coming out of the mouths around me, I wondered how would I be able to last that long. For sure, to wake up next to someone with such an accent must be some anti-climax! Give me the south east English accent anytime. But Irish?

It is a fact that the Irish are totally ignorant regarding the cultures of thousands of beautiful countries and regions all over the world. Most of those cultures include story-telling, playing music, singing. But , again, silly us, we forgot, only the Irish sing and play music .... How many times do you want to hear the boooooooring Danny song?

So Mr Paddy, I've been married to an Irishman for 32 years. I know the Irish history (I made sure I read the books), I know what Ireland was like 30 years ago, I know the mentality of the Irish, I know everything about you all. And it is not very pretty.

The chip on the shoulder? Well, you have one on each shoulder, for balance. And that stops you from rising up. You see the other nationalities, (let's take the French and the German you hate so much) they are very secure about themselves and they are bloody right about it. So, they don't care what anybody thinks about them. I am French (ho la la, a frog!) and the one thing I am proud of is that in France, unlike in Ireland, we are very curious about other nationalities.

My origins are in Brittany. Brittany -- where people do not like the Irish. Why? Because you are ignorant. You are the ones who are not interested in other cultures. The Scottish and the Welsh are loved in Brittany, Why? Because they are interested in all those people coming to the festivals from all over the world to introduce us to their culture. But you? Forget it.

Even when it comes to business in France, you are known as not trustworthy. A lot of bullshit, yes!

When I was in sales in London, the Irish clients were the easiest to get. Why? Just telling them, "I am married to an Irishman" was sufficient to get the appointment/the deal. They all thought they were loved. Idiots! Sometimes I even found it too easy.

I have a friend who is the director of a recruitment agency for hotel industry management. Well, guess what? Irish women are the most difficult to place. Why? Because they are vile. They believe that being a good manager is to bully people. Very Irish!

Irish friends? No, it does not exist. I am not saying there are no nice Irish people. But friendship can be difficult among people who begrudge the success of their neighbour. (Don't deny it, even the Irish say it themselves). For whatever reason, you are obsessed with money. In France, we consider it vulgar to talk about money.

So, to your last comment, that everybody likes you when you are rich, let me tell you something. No matter what, Paddy, and don't forget it, no amount of money will hide the smell of dung which will always stick to your magnificent boots wherever you'll go.

And next time, don't mix up "patronising you" with "liking you".

A nationality is just an accident of birth, which means that when people say, for example: "I am proud of being Irish", it is an absurdity. We do nothing in order to have a nationality. And to be proud of something, you must achieve something, work at it, like when you succeed at your exams.

But for sure, I am very happy to be French. Thank God for that accident of birth. How awful to think I could have been born Irish! Italian, Spanish, yes. But Irish! And maybe that is why deep down you're so afraid of not being liked. You realise yourself how pathetic you are.

As for the accent of my husband, he has a great musical ear, and maybe that is why he has hardly any Irish accent. Lucky me!

Anyway, keep dreaming.

PS: All the people I know from Italy, France, Poland, etc are French, Italian, Polish. Nobody calls himself/herself European. Nobody.

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