queenofthefaces asked: I've seen people call ruby and sapphire "unhealthy" because of their obsession with one another; personally, I don't think we can call them unhealthy, because they're gems who always want to be fused, they always want to be one person, and that's not something that we can fully relate to, aka, their relationship is not like a human relationship and shouldn't be fully compared to one. But what are your thoughts on the subject?

I’m of the same mind as you on this one. I think when people refer to a relationship being unhealthy, that would be a situation in which the members of that relationship stifle each other, in which they hold each other back and make each other unhappy, in which they feel as though they weren’t becoming better people in the process.

1. On Garnet as a permafusion

I think the issue of Garnet as a perma-fusion would appear this way if we saw fusion as a purely physical unity of its members. In all my posts about fusion, I try really heart to emphasise the idea that it’s a metaphor for the relationship as a whole. And as Rebecca Sugar explained it, it isn’t limited to the romantic relationships, but rather a manifestation of the concept relationship as a whole, be it good or bad, love or hatred.

Because from a purely physical standpoint, it does look as though it were a stifling relationship. Two individuals who always had to be together and couldn’t function when they were physically apart. But here’s the thing, Garnet is not just Ruby plus Sapphire. Garnet is a manifestation of their relationship. This means that Garnet’s existence is Ruby and Sapphire’s tangibly showing everyone their being in that relationship.

When they aren’t Garnet, they don’t have a visible relationship with one another. And that’s the difference between theirs and a human relationship. We don’t have a way of immediately letting everyone know how we relate to the people around us. Gems look at a fusion and immediately know it’s a fusion; they look at how the fusion acts and can make guesswork of how the component gems relate with one another using standards such as stability and independent voices. With humans, there’s no option for that.

Ruby and Sapphire are still Ruby and Sapphire, but they’re also Garnet. They have full consciousness of what goes on when they’re fused “We already love you, Steven.” They still retain their points of view and their personalities, and we see that come into play in episodes such as Keystone Motel. And just because Garnet doesn’t split up it doesn’t mean Ruby and Sapphire are just of one mind all the time, as we saw in Keeping it Together. Garnet is “a conversation” of love as she said so succinctly and as the series has progressed, we’ve started to see that aspect more and more.

Because they’re romantically involved, being Garnet is their version of wearing wedding rings. It’s a way for everyone to know they’re in that relationship. They move beyond the physical relationship, because there’s more than physical synchronicity need to fuse. Fusion entails mental and emotional sameness. Therefore, their longterm fusion is testament to how stable their relationship is, not necessarily their always being together.

2. On Ruby and Sapphire when they’re apart

That being said, I think it makes more sense now why they always want to be fused. But I’d also like to point out (as I have multiple times in the past) that Garnet isn’t a “perfect” fusion and Ruby and Sapphire don’t have the “perfect” relationship. None of them are; none of them do.

Ruby is still struggling with inferiority issues. We’ve seen that in Keystone Motel.

Ruby: Sapphire… – No, no no no no no no no! This is all my fault! I-I didn’t want to look for a solution, I-I just wanted to be mad! Y-You’re right! You’re always right! I was being stupid! Sapphire: I don’t think you’re stupid! Ruby: I’m… sorry…

Source: SU Wiki

She still feels as though she’s the goofy, replaceable one Sapphire settled for or is stuck with,

“And now you’re trapped here forever!”

“What about you?”

“What about me?”

Source: Something Entirely New

And it’s not something she brings up or tries to acknowledge. In those moments, Sapphire is always quick to say “No that’s not true!” But the issue persists because they don’t get to talk about it and deal with it completely. From Ruby’s perspective, of course Sapphire says these things, she loves her! in the same way we don’t believe it when someone who loves us pays us a compliment.

And Sapphire is still struggling with expression and transparency, especially when it comes to feelings.

Sapphire: But we made him feel… like it was his fault. I keep looking into the future, when all of this has already been solved… As if it doesn’t matter how you feel in the present… No wonder you think I don’t care!

Source: SU Wiki

So their relationship isn’t perfect. But I wouldn’t say it’s unhealthy. Ruby and Sapphire are very different individuals, but they don’t try to be the same person, that’s not what fusion is. Thousands of years after they first met, we still recognise the same gems from The Answer. And what I like about them is that they don’t pretend their own issues don’t exist or gloss over each others’ problems. Each time, they actively address those problems.

In Hit the Diamond, Sapphire first convinces Ruby that she can pull it off, “You can do this, just act casual,” fully knowing that Ruby doesn’t have a lot of faith in herself.

And later on, Ruby convinces Sapphire she can make the home-run, “You can look at me when you’re running for home.” I think a lot of people interpret the two as being unable to function apart from one another, but here’s the other thing. They’re individuals who’ve grown together. If my Garnet weapon analysis are accurate, then in moments of stress and elation, they’ve relied on each other. The times they’ve unfused are incredibly dangerous situations with a lot at stake, so it’s understandable that their first instinct is to refuse. When Sapphire says all she wants to look at is Ruby, it’s because she’s afraid. There’s a lot at stake in this game, and the Ruby Squad doesn’t make it easy. They’re soldier gems using their superior speed and reflexes. Even if Sapphire did focus, she wouldn’t have that kind of training under her belt, especially as an aristocrat. She’s nervous and she wants to look at someone who loves her for support and reassurance; I think we’ve all done that in one way or another.

3. On Flirting

The last thing I want to talk about is how Ruby and Sapphire were acting before thing heated up in Hit the Diamond.

I feel a lot of viewers felt like Eyeball in that moment, going “Really? Now of all times?” And perhaps that’s where they get the notion that it’s unhealthy for them because the only thing they think about is each other.

But in all honesty, even with the world at stake, the CGs did treat the entire thing as a fun game. We even had that montage when the teams were smiling and congratulating one another for different things.

The other thing is that if they wanted to be together all the time, they wouldn’t have voluntarily unfused to help their friends. They have the presence of mind to form meaningful relationships with the other Crystal Gems, with Greg, and I’m sure, the other comrades they feel responsible for even today. Those aren’t the indication of a suffocating relationship. Relationship that insist on being the only thing in the individuals’ lives, that shut out other loved ones and friends, those are the relationships you need to worry about. Those are moments things are obsessive. But Ruby and Sapphire know when it’s appropriate to unfuse and help their friends, I think that’s a pretty good distinction to make. As for complaining about the times they’re always together for no reason the way Peridot did in Log Date 7 15 2, well, that’s no one’s concern but theirs.

So they get sidetracked, they argue, and they want to show everyone how together they are, but those are hardly signs that they’re in an unhealthy and obsessive relationship. They do have things to work on, and sometimes staying fused all the time prevents them from doing so, but they’re working on it, in the same way that even our relationships have these issues rear their awful heads whenever we argue with those we care about too.