Pay attention to what's cool about them and get in the habit of bragging about your stepchildren the way you do your own. "My little stepdaughter is so smart, she figured out how to use the computer faster than I did." "My stepson is awesome, yesterday he was singing along with my favorite song and would you believe it, he was on key and he danced. He's got a real talent!" Whatever their talents and interests are, take pride in them as part of your family. Don't make a specific point of doing it in front of them. If you get in the habit, they'll pick it up from how new people treat them and they'll eventually overhear you because you won't notice they're listening. The less deliberate it is, the more powerful an impact this will have that you're a real parent, a good late inning pinch-hitter they can count on. (This is also a good thing to do with your own children. It builds their confidence in life.)b