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Wednesday is April Fools’ Day. If you're like me, you're waiting for someone to finally tell us the coronavirus pandemic all one giant prank. But it’s real. And it’s going to get more real.

We need to stay home and stay sane. We need to hold it together. So far, we have.

Calling this heroic is an understatement. It's not about having the courage to stay home and do puzzles. No, we are driving our economy to the far edge of its limits in order to save our most vulnerable lives.

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Meanwhile, crime is dropping. Are thugs staying home? Or maybe social media, which we often bash, have transformed into something crucial.

Like the MyPillow guy making hospital masks, social media suddenly became essential –- by allowing the separated to join. It’s now the glue.

Still, now has never been a better time to avoid the media's latest divisive offerings. With the stress of this shutdown, who needs that?

But maybe we're shedding that negativity naturally. Did you notice how those TV segments we had pre-quarantine, have disappeared? Racism. Sexism. Gender pronouns. I mean, where's Antifa? Did we just stop canceling people?

We may not be immune to the media's influence, but our unity has destroyed their assessments of who we are. We're sticking together, not turning on each other. We are exactly who we think we are, and who the media say we weren't.

With 9/11, we sent troops to war. Here, we are all the troops now. Team America. But unity can't pay the bills. Or can it?

It's the first of the month. You've got rent, mortgages, utilities and credit card interest that would make Don Corleone blush. It’s time for a pause.

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In auto sports, a yellow flag has all drivers slow down. Nobody passes. We stay in the same place. No one overtakes another.

We need that here. Everyone gets a pass on their bills. That includes landlords. If they're not getting rent, then their taxes, insurance and mortgages get a pass as well.

Nothing goes out, nothing comes in. A freeze.

Imagine the economy like a remote, and you just hit pause on that TV called life. In a month, maybe we can hit play and double the speed to catch up.

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Consider it a pact among fellow citizens. That way, when your grandkids ask you what you did during the great quarantine of 2020, you can say “Not much.” But the weirdest thing? We did it all together.

Adapted from Greg Gutfeld's monologue on "The Five" on April 1, 2020.

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