mumderland Fri 16-Aug-19 12:21:33

I feel for you op. I had this with my 5yo DS for about 18 months. It's so hard! Luckily his school were very understanding and worked with me to help him.

In the end I had him on the highest dose of laxatives, this was very messy but when he soiled we didn't react. Just said next time do you think you can make it to the toilet? I gradually reduced the dose once he started going to the toilet. He's now on 1 sachet a day. We also refer to it as his poo medicine which makes his poo soft so it's easier to push out.

We bought a few books, there's a few on amazon. I think one called Liam goes poo on the toilet, where's the poo? And everyone poos. There's also an app called poo goes to Poo land which he really liked.

We routinely put him on the toilet for around 15 minutes at a time. And with school we had a book and wrote down everything he ate and every wee/poo/accident he had and we were able to figure out he always had an accident around lunchtime so we knew to sit him on the toilet at that time.

Consistency is key. As he is autistic does he respond well to routine? Maybe a routine chart will help so he knows when it's time to sit on the toilet.

My DS is being assessed for autism (I'm very sure he is) and we found just keeping things consistent really helped him. Also when he did poo on the toilet we didn't make too big of a thing about it because that seemed to put more pressure on him to do it again. We just sort of said well done you did a poo on the toilet! Then carried on with our day.

I truly believe that it's all down to the child as well, from all the research I did on this the majority of parents said that one day the child just decided to go to the toilet! And that's what happened with my DS!

I hope some of that helps!