TWT #147 –

On May 27th, 1692, the Court of Oyer and Terminer was founded in Massachusetts by Sir William Phips for the sole purpose of convicting definitely-not-innocent girls as witches and sentencing them to death.

The phrase “Oyer and Terminer” essentially means “to hear and to determine” and I’m suuuuuure there was sooooo much “hearing” and “determining” in these witch trials.

They deeeeefinitely did not just accuse and convict innocent girls of being witches and then kill them mercilessly.

(Is the sarcasm getting across? It’s hard to tell in writing…)

Anyway, William Phips was a sonofabitch who somehow rose from shepherd boy to full-blown knight and governor of Massachusetts. And then, instead of dispelling the rumors of witchcraft being spread among his people, set up a real legal court to hear the trials against little girls, which ended in the deaths of those little girls.

Alas, no matter what I say about this turd of a man who gave credence and legitimacy to the ongoing witchcraft allegations in Salem, I will never be able to take away HIS NAME!

(p.s. if you liked this Terrible take on history, sign up for our newsletter for exclusive Terrible stories!)

Email address: Leave this field empty if you’re human: