1,742,400 Minutes I’ve Been Missing You

3 years, 3 months and 22 days since the last time we were together

WOW, it sure has been a long haul. I remember the first moment I met you. I was a 15-year-old crying boy up at the cottage with Jeff. He had no clue how to make me better so he introduced us. For me it was love at first touch, but hey, anyone would love you considering your assets. We really hit it off right away. I always wanted to be near you, and if not with you, close to you. I wanted you to be touching my lips 24/7. Those were the days; I was dumb, young and didn’t care that you were not the right thing for me; I just said fuck it.

At first I hid you from everyone, you knew I had to. I could barely even see you without sneaking around, but I found a way. I would go out every night just to be with you. I even hid you in my bathroom and let you sneak out the windows a couple times.

Things got intense, maybe too intense in University, I couldn’t be social without you, I even brought you out with my parents. I remember the day they first saw you and I together, the shock on their faces was intolerable but I was proud of who I was and that made it ok.

I dreamt about you every night, I would even wake up in the middle of the night just to be with you for a moment. Funny, looking back now we probably should have separated earlier but I think when I moved back home it was a good time to move on.

I think about you everyday. My dreams vividly remind me of you as if a spirit is making sure that I never forget you. When I awake every morning the first moment of the day is spent thinking of you before realizing we aren’t together anymore. When I see you with my friends it takes unlimited self control to not scream I love you, grab you and kiss you. I just wish you would go away, forever, because I cannot look at you. I don’t want to, because I want you and ill always want you. You are permanently a part of me.

I hope I never see you again.

I love you more than I hate you,

JoshuaAnon

Ps: she’s a cigarette and apparently I’ll be addicted forever.