World News Texas struggling with life under communism

Texas is now a communist state following the re-election of Barack Obama, it has emerged. The president has introduced the forced collectivisation of farms, the confiscation of private weapons and replaced repeats of The Dukes Of Hazzard with four hour documentaries about tractors.Country and western has been banned, replaced by state-approved raps in praise of the Dear Leader Obama. No one is allowed to leave the country except to go to Cuba.Texan Tom Booker said: “While African-Americans and Muslims enjoy special state privileges and cushy jobs, we ordinary white Texans must endure their towns and hamlets being burned down by Obama’s henchmen.“We can’t even flee to Mexico because they’ve built a 16 foot high wall with watchtowers and electric fences.”Meanwhile, right wing commentators such as Rush Limbaugh and Glenn Beck have fallen meekly silent, fearful of reprisals from the president’s secret police.In Dallas, now known as Husseinstan, a statue of Lee Harvey Oswald has been erected, hailing him as the revolutionary martyr who slaughtered the Imperialist enemy of the people John F Kennedy.A source at Fox News, now the official state propaganda channel, said: “We at Fox welcome our new master and overlord. We are all red states now. Get used to it.”