• It would be suicidal for the government to seek to pluck Julian Assange from the Ecuadorean embassy, says President Correa. And the problem is, he's right. Silly even to have floated the idea. But in part understandable, because the whole Assange-Ecuador-asylum thing definitely has the authorities discombobulated. Yesterday we told of how a police officer accosted a blameless rail traveller in west London, his enthusiasm fired up by the belief that he was spearheading the capture of the man who leaked the secrets. Today, we can reveal a bit more about the debacle. The guy who was required to prove that he was not Assange was Nick Potter, one of the country's leading consultant osteopaths and the son of a former high court judge. He is blond, whereby Assange has the platinum locks we have come to know. They are not particularly alike. "He said 'I have reason to believe you are a suspect we have been looking for'," Potter told us. "I said, 'what am I supposed to have done'. He said 'I have reason to believe you are Julian Assange'. Everyone went quiet." And here is the really interesting bit. "I said 'I thought he was in the Ecuadorean embassy'. And he said 'we have strong reason to believe he is at large'." Which suggests that just by staying where he was but keeping his head down, Assange had them fearing that he had already flown the nest. Isn't that typical? He should climb the balcony each day and give us a wave.

• For we crave reassurance. That is why many worry about the questionnaire being handed out to users of the reading rooms at the British Library. It's "your chance to support our future", it says. But it all becomes a bit disturbing. We are funded by taxation, it says. "In the unlikely event that this funding ceased to be provided, would you be willing to pay an amount?" Of course, it is not going to happen. We just want to "capture the value that you place on the reading room and its services". By the way, how much would you pay "to support the continuation"? It won't happen; perish the thought. "There is no indication that public funding will end." But while we're here, just talking and thinking the unthinkable; if we stopped issuing reader passes but allowed you to rent out your reader pass, how much would you want for it each month? Don't worry. It's just another attempt to "capture the value". Hmm.

• So what will they do now, we asked with reference to the Scientologists who were busy during the Olympics handing out anti-drug booklets that nowhere mentioned Scientology? We should have known they would surface somewhere. And sure enough, an eagle-eyed reader spotted a batch on offer around his local Tesco in south-east London. Something to do between now and the Paralympics.

• Much amusement to be had, meanwhile, from the memoirs of the former home secretary David Waddington. He always presented as a dry stick, but given free rein and away from Baroness Thatcher's gaze, he emerges as a seasoned gossip. There is a tale of the late Sir Alan Glyn, the former Tory MP for Windsor and Maidenhead, who – ever the model of proactivity – summoned a group of young Tories to go canvassing with him. "They duly turned up, but there was no Dr Glyn," recalls Waddington. "Eventually a search party went up to his room. There was no immediate sign of him, but there was an old-fashioned wardrobe lying face down on the floor – and the team set about restoring it to an upright position. Underneath it they discovered the good doctor. In the middle of the night, he had set off to go to the lavatory, but instead of going through the door into the bathroom, he had found his way into the cupboard. The cupboard had fallen over, trapping him inside – and he had spent the rest of the night there." He should, perhaps, have called for help. But the good Tory fends for himself.

• Finally, we hear from Ian Bone, founder of Class War. He's off to the cricket. "Forty years ago I was protesting the Springboks rugby tour," he says. On 31 August, he'll convene a gathering at the Oval to meet the South Africans, a protest at the mining massacre at Marikana. Same fire in his belly. Less hair.

Twitter: @hugh_muir