FEELING frustrated or fed up in your relationship? You're not alone.

More couples are expected to file for divorce on January 7 – now dubbed D-Day - than at any other time of year.

11 Corinne admits that not having sex can make her very grumpy Credit: Solent News

Fabulous Digital has teamed up with Relate, which provides relationships counselling nationwide, to help ordinary couples overcome some of the most common marriage problems, including infidelity, excessive arguing, an unfulfilling sex life and the pressures of having kids.

Here two mums with much higher libidos than their husbands reveal the toll its taken on their marriage - and how they got through it.

'I asked him for an open relationship but he said no'

Mum-of-two Corinne Jones, 27, from Portsmouth, has been with husband Lewis, 33, for nine years. She says he'd rather get a takeaway and watch telly than have sex…

When we first met we’d have sex every time we saw each other. But now, with us both working and being parents, it’s much less frequent.

11 Mum Corinne says Lewis would rather get a takeaway and watch telly than have sex Credit: Solent News

Now, we find ourselves scheduling sex in, which really takes the romance and element of surprise out of it.

The turning point for us was having a child because our eldest didn’t sleep well at all for two years. Now both our children sleep so that’s not a problem but he’d still rather have dinner and go to bed.

I always have the energy for sex, so I feel like I’m pestering him all the time. The longest we’ve gone without it is six weeks, and you end up drifting apart. I once said to him “Do you think we’ve forgotten how to do it?”

We’ve been through quite a lot; we got pregnant after a year of dating, then we got engaged, bought a house and got married when our little one (now seven) was quite small.

We went on to have a couple of miscarriages before having our second son (now three), then suffered another two miscarriages.

Obviously when something like that happens it can really knock you and it affected our marriage.

Lewis started turning me down when I wanted to have sex.

11 The couple have been together for 10 years and got pregnant after a year of dating Credit: Solent News

He will say it’s just because he’s tired or has got a headache but you can’t help but feel he says that all the time and it’s just an excuse. When you get turned down it makes you feel rubbish.

We both work really hard – me as a part-time health care worker and him as a manager – and my libido is much higher than his, so I really have to coax him into the bedroom.

I did ask him once if he’d be up for an open relationship but he wasn’t keen on that idea.

I need physical contact in a relationship – sex is really important to me, and if I don’t have it often then my mood plummets and I feel really low. I’d love to have it two or three times a week to keep me happy, but it’s normally once every two weeks.

I always have the energy for sex, so I feel like I’m pestering him all the time Corinne Jones,

Lewis works longer, more unsociable hours than me which doesn’t help – he’s often up at 5am, so I do understand that he’s tired.

But it’s irritating because if I’m off and at home with the kids all day I find myself planning a sexy night for us, picking out nice outfits to wear.

Then if he comes home and turns me down it’s such a disappointment and a knock to my confidence.

It makes me really grumpy - it does cause rows between us. It’s horrible because he goes off to work the next morning and I stew on it for ages.

It’s so hard because sex is everywhere. If you speak to your friends and they don’t have that problem, you feel like the only one and it’s quite a lonely place.

11 Corinne says she always has energy for sex, so feels like she's pestering Lewis Credit: MUSSELWHITE PHOTOGRAPHY

I feel like a lot of people pretend that their relationships are really perfect, which is why I think it’s a good thing to speak out about this issue.

One of the things that helps us is going into shops like Ann Summers and experimenting with new toys and outfits. I do think it helps to spice up your marriage.

Ultimately I have to respect this is just how he is and if he really doesn’t want it, I can’t make him.

He’s quite a content person so he doesn’t feel like he needs to have sex in order to be close to me, whereas I feel like I need that connection. He’s quite happy to have a takeaway and sit on the sofa - that would be his ideal night.

Sometimes you just have to accept going to bed earlier and cuddling - you’ve just got to take what you can get.

Lewis said: "Occasionally our mixed libidos puts pressure on our relationship but we love one another dearly and work through any problems we might have had."

Check our Corinne's parenting blog here.

'Regular sex leaves my husband in agony'

Mandy George, 40, of Jarrow, South Tyneside, has been with husband Sam, 40, for 15 years. He suffers from fibromyalgia and also has chronic fatigue syndrome (known as ME) which has had a devastating impact on their once VERY active sex-life…

11 Mandy George has been with husband Sam, who suffers from fibromyalgia, from 15 years Credit: North News and Pictures

WHEN Sam and I first got together in 2003 we had a very active and enjoyable sex life. We’re both quite experimental and up for trying new things – we got to the point where there was nothing left in Ann Summers for us to try.

Then all of sudden, Sam started knocking me back.

My self-confidence took a big hit and I wouldn’t make any moves on him for fear of being rejected.

Initially we didn’t really talk about it – we went from having sex all the time to going months without doing anything at all.

11 When they first met, Mandy and Sam had a very active sex life Credit: North News and Pictures

There would be times where I’d worry he didn’t find me attractive or fancy me anymore. I’d ask what I’d done wrong.

I now know Sam was pulling back because he didn’t want to hug me or be affectionate in case I took it the wrong way and was disappointed when it didn’t lead to more.

Eventually it got to a point where I broke down and told him: “I can’t handle this, I’m turning off all of my urges to have sex.” That’s when he came out and said he’d been holding back because he was in agony.

It started off as pain in his lower back and feeling very tired; we just thought he’d pulled a muscle and his body clock was the wrong way around from working shifts as a DJ doing karaoke. As it was a new relationship he tried to push through and ignore it.

11 Mandy, pictured at her wedding, said there she would worry Sam didn’t find her attractive or fancy her anymore Credit: North News and Pictures

Doctors had previously blamed his symptoms on smoking, eating the wrong things and him being underweight. It wasn’t until he finally went to a new GP when we moved house in early 2005, a year after we got married, that he was properly diagnosed with fibromyalgia, around the time I fell pregnant with our first child.

Suddenly it made so much more sense. Five years after that he was diagnosed with chronic fatigue syndrome, which gets referred to as ME (myalgic encephalomyelitis).

Both leave him with chronic pain and fatigue and there are some cognitive side effects – he can find it difficult to find the right words sometimes.

He lost his job as a taxi driver because of his condition, and I’m now his carer as well as a stay-at-home mum to our youngest child.

11 Sams condition is so severe he sometimes needs a wheelchair Credit: North News and Pictures

I begged Sam not to withdraw his affection, because even if we can’t have sex, we can still find ways to be intimate with each other.

Even if it’s just a hug or lying in bed together watching TV holding hands, it’s still that physical contact.

It can be very frustrating for him; sometimes he’ll say to me: “I can’t but I would love to take you upstairs right now.” But knowing that he wants to makes up for not necessarily being able to.

I don’t think it ever got to a point where we thought we couldn’t be together any more – we love each other, we still find each other attractive, it’s just his body that isn’t cooperating.

Given the choice I’d be having sex every couple of days. The longest we’ve gone without is about three months. We’ve got three kids, so we’ve obviously managed it a couple of times as two of them were conceived after his diagnosis.

11 The couple, who have three children, said talking about it saved their relationship Credit: North News and Pictures

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I think we’ve got to a point now where, yes I would have more sex if it was on offer, but we make the most of the times he’s feeling good.

It’s always a double-edged sword as if we do it loads when he’s feeling OK, he’ll pay for it for up to a week after.

We focus more on me in those times; sometimes I’ll lie and masturbate beside him and he’ll stroke me, hold my hand or kiss me. If he feels up for going further we’ll do it.

He feels guilty that he can’t always give me what I want in the bedroom, and there are times I get really annoyed, but it’s always directed at the illnesses, not him.

11 Mandy and Sam now make the most of the time he feels well Credit: North News and Pictures

I know some people in our situation have open relationshipS and I don’t judge people that do that sort of thing. It wouldn’t be off the table for us if it came to a point; I have friends who are polyamorous.

There are phases where you look at Sam and think he has absolutely no disability whatsoever. Then he’ll have a crash again and need to use a wheelchair.

That up-and-down can effect things intimately and more generally in the relationship.

I’m not unhappy with the level of intimacy between us because we talk to each other. We’ve got through the upset and I’m now comfortable enough in my own skin to know how he feels about me.

FIVE TOP TIPS FOR DEALING WITH MISMATCHED LIBIDOS IN A RELATIONSHIP Peter Saddington is a relationships counsellor and sex therapist with Relate and says communicating with your partner is key to dealing with mismatched libidos. DISCUSS YOUR DESIRES Talk about what you like and want when you are being sexual. It’s easy to forget the range of things you can do in the bedroom, meaning sex can become perfunctory or routine. Exploring what you and your partner want will make sex more enjoyable – meaning you’re more likely to want to repeat it. FOCUS ON WHAT YOU WANT, NOT JUST YOUR PARTNER Learn to be a bit selfish – if you’re always focusing on making sure your partner has a good time, you lose sight of your own enjoyment. MAKE TIME FOR BEING SEXUAL Many people say they want sex to be spontaneous, but in reality most good sex is planned. Most modern couples are under pressure in terms of time with work and children – setting aside time to be intimate with each other is very important. LEARN LOVE LANGUAGES We’re all different, and understanding how your partner feels loved is the key to feeling close to them. For some it’s talking, for some it’s giving gifts, and for others it’s giving time. If you’re able to speak their love language, they’ll be more likely to become aroused. EXERCISE MORE AND BOOZE LESS Exercise is fantastic for increasing your libido, while drinking a lot is likely to reduce it.

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Relate reports receiving 13 per cent MORE calls and 58 per cent more visitors to its website in January.

We previously revealed the age your sex drive will be at its most rampant.

And here's how you can learn to enjoy good sex and love in a long-term relationship.