A viral blog post written by a blogger named NYC Pastor has many people’s panties in a twist, myself included. In a nutshell, the guy appears to be quite narrow-minded, to put it kindly. To be blunt and more specific, he could be appropriately identified as a sexist.

The post in question is titled “10 WOMEN CHRISTIAN MEN SHOULD NOT MARRY,” and the all-caps were the author’s doing, not mine. So by just reading the title, we have already identified the first problem. But if you thought all-caps was the most obnoxious sin the NYC Pastor could commit, think again.

I read the post and laughed. And laughed. And laughed some more. Seriously, give it a read if you need a good joke. While I was appalled at the author’s outdated and offensive views towards women, it was still an amusing read because of its absurdity.

In his introduction, NYC Pastor states that he wrote another post of the ten men Christian women should not marry. Hoping that this dude’s offensive views knew no gender, I took a look and discovered that I was wrong. Even while discussing men that are “not worthy” of Christian women, the author still manages to bash women in the process, making sure that women are to blame for everything. Seriously, he went above and beyond to offend any woman who stumbles upon his blog.

After I pulled myself together, I decided that my thoughts cannot be limited to a paragraph left in the comment section on NYC Pastor’s post (of which there are 1,105 comments total). Instead, my thoughts deserve an entire blog post, listing my responses to every one of NYC Pastor’s 10 “reasons.” Here we go:

1. The Unbeliever

I get it. Some Christians believe that they should marry other Christians. But honestly, is that anyone else’s business besides the people involved in the relationship? If they’re happy, they’re happy. End of story.

2. The Divorcee

NYC Pastor claims that Christians can only divorce if their partner cheated within the marriage. Sooo, domestic violence doesn’t exist or what? Emotional abuse is perfectly acceptable? A woman should just put up with it, because if she divorces the rotten, good-for-nothing jerk, she’s a “sinner” and not worthy of having a healthy second marriage? You, sir, are an asshole.

3. The Older Woman

What defines an “older” woman, according to the NYC Pastor? Two years. He cites some supposed “research” to back up his claim that marrying a woman one to three years older means men are 53% more likely to divorce their wives. Does he realize that regardless of age, socio-economic status, and religion, that over half of all marriages fail anyway? But the other reason he believes men shouldn’t marry “older” women? Why of course, it’s because men were created first, and have authority over women! Duh! He even leaves us with a beautiful Bible verse which states that women are “to remain quiet.” Nope, that wasn’t a typo. I double-checked.

4. The Feminist

Ohhh no he di’n’t! I’m rolling up my sleeves as we speak, and about to throw some punches in the form of written words. Basically, the Pastor regurgitates some Bible verses about how women were created “for” men, how we live to serve men, get on our knees to kiss their feet, all that sexist bullshit.

No.

Hate to break it to you, sweetheart, but no woman was born to serve you. She has her own life, and she doesn’t care about you. After reading this blog post, I’m sure most women will not give you the time of day besides giving you a piece of our minds. You think you can dish it out, but can you take it?

Women have been oppressed by assholes who spouted the same words you did, and we stand up against these lies you try to shove down the throats of your fellow Christians. Funny how you worship these lies that make the lives of men more convenient and important than women’s. That isn’t a coincidence. Without feminism, women would still be second-class citizens, duct tape around our mouths, our wrists tied with rope. We have a voice, and we are people.

5. The Immodest-Dresser

Let me get this straight: if a man gawks at a woman dressed “sexy,” it’s the woman’s fault for the man objectifying her because she’s dressed that way? Ah, thank you for slut shaming women everywhere, Mr. Pastor. I’m willing to bet you also blame rape victims because “they were asking for it.”

6. The Gossiper/Slanderer

Yes, gossiping and slander are not desired qualities to have in any relationship. However, bashing women everywhere in a blog post is not necessarily the definition of “wisdom,” now is it?

7. The Childbirth Avoider

Unrelated: It’s amusing how he titled this reason “The Childbirth Avoider” as if you’re avoiding a cold. You better make sure to take your Vitamin C and wash your hands frequently: everyone’s catching The Childbirth!

NYC Pastor’s advice: if you don’t want kids, don’t get married. Period. Marriage isn’t about spending your lives with someone you love. It’s about poppin’ out them babies. We must use our reproductive organs and have babies, or suffer the wrath of God! Or, you know, just have a happy life without kids, if that’s how you roll. Either one.

8. The Wander-Luster (seriously, this guy has a hyphen problem)

Family vacations: Good.

Traveling the world: Bad.

The dude has the audacity to say that women who are frequently “out of the home” are to be avoided. Why? Because, according to Pastor, women who travel outside of their front door are “loud…busybodies who talk nonsense.” Oh sorry, he was quoting the Bible there. My bad. But seriously? Women who travel are gaining experiences, knowledge, and meeting new people. This guy claims that any opportunity in which the woman isn’t serving a man and is out of a man’s control is a sin.

9. The Career-first Woman

Don’t worry, women can work! Phew, I was worried there for a second. But women must also raise her children at the same time. Women should not make more money than their husband’s, because their penises will shrivel up (Book of Leviticus). Women should be overjoyed to quit their jobs and stay at home, because men cannot stay at home or raise children. Their penises will shrivel up, and their flesh will burn (Book of Job).

10. The Devotion-less Woman (again with the hyphens!)

This point isn’t nearly as disgusting as the rest of NYC Pastor’s post. A Christian wanting to find someone who is devoted to his or her religion is understandable. However, just like in the first point, if a couple is happy, it’s no one else’s business. I thought the Pastor said women can’t be busybodies? Oh, but it’s okay if men are? That makes perfect sense. Men are superior, after all, especially pricks like NYC Pastor. He knows what he’s talking about.

There you have it, my snarky response to a blog post that made me feel more snarky than usual. It’s because of men like this that women need feminism, and will always need it. We are not done, we will not be quiet. We will raise our voices even louder to shut you up, NYC Pastor. Shut up and sit down.