Rule number 1 – Keep your eyes up when you’re down there. You dont know what she might be doing. Snapping pictures. Skyping in a friend. Fuck should could be grabbing a gun about to rob your ass. You dont know. Keep your head on a swivel on the field and keep your eyes up when eating pussy.

Rule number 2 – Never, ever have a distinguishing hair-do like this. If ODB has normal colored hair, that could literally be any black guy eating pussy. Theres no way to prove anything. But noooo. ODB has to run around town looking like fucking Rufio every day. So every time anyone snap chats or tweets or videos him in a compromising position, everyone knows its him. Ditch the signature look bro. Go with the generic black man look. Life will be easier.

Not that hes doing anything wrong. Hes young single and ready to tickle with his tongue. Its all gravy. I’m just saying there are a couple simple rules that will make your life A LOT less hectic, brotha

PS – Also, very confused on whether or not black guys like going down on chicks. At first I thought they avoid it like the plague. Like the same way they would never let a dog lick their face. But then I see other evidence where they seem to love it. So, do black dudes like going down on chicks or not? #AABB