Feminism Is For All Women

Except for some women

Before applying to become a card carrying feminist, please make sure you don’t violate any of our community standards, including:

Being a woman who votes Republican

Holding any socially conservative views whatsoever (alternatively, bonus points are given out for displaying an LGBTQ flag on your bumper)

Supporting the pro-life movement

Going on a diet or wanting to lose weight

Not wanting to have it all (marriage, career, kids, pets, houseplants and a side hustle)

Thinking women should take responsibility for how much alcohol they consume on a night out

Agreeing with or espousing values made popular by radical second-wave feminist Andrea Dworkin

Not blaming everything wrong with the world on the patriarchy, or asking for clarification on what exactly that means

Believing current fourth-wave feminism is just propping up the same capitalistic values it claims to want to dismantle

Thinking more female CEOs won’t lead to less armed conflict around the world

Disowning the feminist label because the cult-like status of today’s movement makes you uncomfortable

Liking men

If none of these apply to you, and you are a white, heterosexual, upper-middle class female from a developed country, your application to be indoctrinated into feminism is straightforward.

For all other women, please use the “Intersectional Feminist” form.