Dear Queer Mormons, We are So So Sorry.

We realize that it is not within our stewardship to apologize for or in behalf of the institution that is The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, however institutions are cold things bogged down in bureaucracy.

Our Mormonism is not cold or distant, it is alive inside each of us, it dwells in our hearts, and informs our choices every day. We love the Gospel. We love our Mormon culture and people. Mormonism is our home, our family. And we know that our queer siblings do not feel the love and belonging that we owe them as a Mormon family.

This last week has felt like a family disaster, like our dear sweet grandpas, from whom we’re used to hearing old-fashioned biased things at family gatherings took one small hopeful step forward, then took a microphone and told the world that the whole family feels the way they feel. We do not agree.

We believe that our queer family deserves a sincere and heart-felt apology. .

We can’t and don’t apologize for the church or our leaders, that is not our place, but on behalf of Our Personal Lived Mormonism, we can apologize.

We are so sorry that you don’t feel safe and welcome at church.

We are so sorry that you have been taught that there is something sinful about who you are.

We are so sorry for the pain and rejection you have felt from your Mormon family.

We are so sorry for all the practices both cultural and institutional that othered you, marginalized you, and made you feel lesser.

And we are so sorry for the times when we didn’t speak up, for the times when we believed these lies too, and for the times when we didn’t reach out and show you the love you deserve.

Dear Queer Mormon family, we want you to know what we believe:

We believe you are worthy of love and belonging.

We believe that you are whole and perfect and exactly as our Heavenly Parents intended you to be.

We believe that our Heavenly Parents want you to experience love and intimacy and have families of your own.

We believe that Church should be a safe haven, where you feel loved and welcomed to come unto Christ.

And we know that these are not the messages that you have received at church.

And for that, we are so so sorry.

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We’d like to ask you to join us, leave a comment with your apology. If you blog or tumbler or tweet or instagram or pinterest, or whatever new fangled things young folks do, say you’re sorry as a Mormon, to our queer Mormon family, and the entire LGBT community.

You are welcome to use this text for your own blog, or you can write an apology all your own. I encourage people to come up with memes and other types of social media, and also to reach out to anyone in your life that you’d like to apologize to personally.

And we are looking for ideas of the next step. Things we can do to reach out and make church better for our queer friends and family. I’ll add some to the post and create new posts as we work toward the goal of making church a nurturing and safe place for everyone.