California Artisan Cheese Festival in Santa Rosa brings out the nerds on curds

They’re big dudes to begin with: brothers and identical twins Charlie and Michael Kalish stand 6 feet, 6 inches. But they are huge in the cheese world, which explained why The Cheese Twins, as they are known in dairy circles, came close to selling out their Saturday afternoon seminar at Santa Rosa’s Flamingo Conference Resort and Spa.

Their clinic, “A Taste of Cheese Science,” could just as easily have been called “Nerds on Curds.”

After noting that the composition of a cow’s milk changes over time, depending on where the bovine happens to be “in its lactation cycle,” Charlie said that cheesemaking “is a craft - and not Kraft with a K.”

The Kalishes were in town for the 13th annual California Artisan Cheese Festival, where mass-?processed cheeses were nowhere to be found. This weekend event featuring seminars, tastings, pairings, plus tours of area farms and creameries, gave turophiles the chance to taste new, limited production cheeses, and generally geek out on goudas, among many other varieties of fromage.

During their talk, the Cheese Twins mentioned having emceed last year’s World Championship Cheese Contest in Wisconsin. “It was a dream come true,” Charlie said.

Next time you’re in Wisconsin, Mike said, “you have to go to one of the local bars for deep-fried cheese curds. Those things are amazing.”

While cheese is “a point of pride” to many people in Wisconsin, “it’s not a part of our identity in California,” said Michael, who along with his brother grew up in Marin County and attended Redwood High School. While artisanal cheeses, and cheesemaking, are gaining popularity in the Golden State, “we don’t get the level of collaboration and support” enjoyed by their peers in the land of the Cheesehead.

That’s where this festival comes in. What started 13 years ago as a gathering to attract tourists to Petaluma during the slow season “has turned into much more than that,” said Judy Groverman Walker, the festival’s executive director.

The festival, expected to draw 2,500 people this year, “has encouraged more people to start dabbling in cheese.”

This year’s event features offerings from some 24 different cheesemakers, “the majority of California’s cheesemakers,” Walker said, “all in one place. You can’t just go to a grocery store to match that experience.”

One of Saturday’s most popular activities was a cheese monger competition. Mongers were paired with cheesemakers, who select a cheese, then join forces to come up with the best possible way to showcase it, “whether that’s with honey or jam, or on a cracker or piece of dried fruit or some chocolate,” Walker said.

The winner would be decided by popular vote.

Just as the festival puts a spotlight on California’s underrated cheeses, this contest celebrates the skills of that underappreciated expert, the monger.

“They’re very knowledgeable,” Walker said, “and go through a lot of training.”

Not all heroes wear capes. But many of them do enjoy crepes - especially with some diced ham and some nice, sliced Gruyere.

You can reach Staff Writer Austin Murphy at 707-521-5214 or austin.murphy@pressdemocrat.com. On Twitter @AusMurph88