It's happened to all of us: you're riding along with a couple dozen of your buddies, minding your own business doing wheelies and rolling burnouts across multiple lanes of traffic when out of nowhere, the police come to ruin your fun.

Fortunately, the video below gives us a clear and repeatable plan for evading the police, with or without a helicopter in the air.

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0:04

Begin by rapidly accelerating through a dense pack of bikes. No reason, really. Just seems like the cool thing to do.

0:06

Put the bike on the rear wheel, then show the pursuing police your sweet kicks. Cops hate sweet kicks.

0:14

Don't forget your wingmen. The more bikes in the oncoming lane, the better. In fact, just ignore those lines on the road entirely. Traffic patterns are for people who like their limbs attached, and that ain't you, kid.

0:17

POP QUIZ: You're approaching an intersection with a stale green. Do you A) Keep your eyes up and look for potential hazards, B) Cover the front and rear brake in anticipation of a light change, or C) Induce a rolling burnout while crossing three lanes and looking over your shoulder?

0:28

Force the pursuing officer into the turn lane, then make sure he has to swerve to avoid a stopped vehicle. WHO'S BREAKING WHAT LAWS NOW, PIG? Pretty sure that's double jeopardy, or something.

1:00

When in doubt, burnout. It's helping.

1:14

Buddy goes down after a brake check by that swine cop? DO NOT STOP. This ain't the Navy, son. Remember to sync "Let the bodies hit the floor" with the clip later. Cops hate "Let the bodies hit the floor."

1:22

EVASION TECHNIQUE: Just head straight at an oncoming car. Don't even look where you're going. Diversion's a hell of a drug.

1:40

Red light? Just blast through that bitch. Don't even check traffic. The cops would be fools to follow you through. Wait, they did? Slow down for them, just in case, and wait for your buddies. Remember, we leave no man behind.

2:49

ADVANCED EVASION TECHNIQUE: Make a slow right hander, but be sure to signal with your arms first, then employ earlier skills by heading right at oncoming traffic. It nearly worked the first time, bro. I swear.

3:00

It's dark. Turn your headlight off.

3:05

COMMUNICATION: Be clear with your wingmen. Wave your hands around, indicating you have no idea what in the hell you're doing. Just in case, make sure he's in the oncoming-traffic lane on a two-lane street.

3:18

ADVANCED COMMUNICATION: Scream, "TURN LEFT, TURN LEFT, TURN LEFT." Point right.

3:26

Use the terrain to your advantage. Cops can't see through concrete, bro. Hide under an overpass until you realize the chopper totally just watched every last one of you ride in.

4:10

THIS IS JUST LIKE FAST & FURIOUS. RIP PAUL WALKER.

4:29

Green light. Stop.

5:30

Kill the lights and ride through a residential street. WHAT COULD GO WRONG?

5:54

Brake-check the dude behind you.

6:13

At last, hide in an alley like any common rodent.

It's a proven system.

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