To all of the moms out there who dreamed of being everything for your kids, but could never really be everything for us,

To all of the moms who would have done anything to keep your children safe by making sure that we always believed like you,

To all of the moms who faced the disturbing and terrifying reality that a child could abandon our religious heritage as the only truth,

To all of the moms who have felt the sting and shame of seeing your child’s need to be independent and to be free of the collective “wisdom” push you away,

To all of the moms who have felt abandoned and unloved by those who you expected to always do what you taught them was God—and the only true way to love,

Please know that we still love and respect you, even if it cannot be the way that you would prefer, simply because we can no longer agree on what is most important in life.

Please know that we are grateful for the care and support that you were capable of giving us in our formative years.

Please know that we understand that you did your best with the tools that you possessed.

Please know that we understand how we have disappointed you by choosing to love and honor our authentic selves over religious community and tradition–to be free of it all.

Please know that the lessons learned on this shared and difficult path have served as a catalyst for growth and self-awareness.

Perhaps one day, when all is said and done, we will look back on this lifetime of conflict and laugh over how important we once thought one worldview should be; when really life was just about experiencing each other from a place of extreme opposition. Perhaps then, we will truly see the gift of wisdom born of conflict and can understand more deeply how our estrangement taught us a bit more about what love really is. Love sets people free.

Happy Mother’s Day

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