Jake Quirke, seven, finds Christmas overwhelming. He was diagnosed with autism at the age of two

He doesn't want presents, he shys away from family gatherings and is oblivious to the excitement of meeting Santa Claus.

Unlike most seven-year-olds Jake Quirke isn't interested in Christmas.

But the youngster isn't throwing a tantrum. He like millions of children across the world, is on the autistic spectrum.

For Jake, Christmas comes wrought with its own challenges.

And for his mother Karen, Thursday will be a day of mixed emotions as she tries to balance her five-year-old daughter Lucy's joy and excitement with her son's indifference.

'It breaks my heart,' she told MailOnline. 'I can't take Jake to meet Santa Claus because it would just distress him.

'But Lucy deserves to enjoy the special Christmas magic.'

Jake was diagnosed with autism when he was two and a half years old.

Aged just six months, as his parents enjoyed their first Christmas with their son, Mrs Quirke said she knew something wasn't right.

'He wasn't interested in the twinkling, colourful lights adorning the tree, while other babies his age were mesmerized.

'I could just tell he wasn't interested,' said Mrs Quirke, from Luton. 'It was clear he didn't like the changes.

'And that's how it has been, he really doesn't want a fuss.'

The 35-year-old admits Christmas is a struggle, as she tries to make it a magical time for Lucy, while being mindful of the challenges it presents Jake.

'The family used to all come over, with presents and expectations. Jake would cry and get flustered - he just needs to be left alone.'

And while Lucy was thrilled to visit Father Christmas on Monday, Mrs Quirke said it 'breaks her heart' to know Jake cannot get the same enjoyment from seeing Santa Claus.

'Jake would rather go to the park with my dad,' she told MailOnline. 'He is oblivious to it all.'

'It is hard seeing other seven-year-olds getting so excited.

'Jake never wants presents, he does appreciate them but doesn't really understand.

'There is no excitement, no magic for him at all.

'He has got a bit better, at school they now build them up to Christmas, to prepare them.

'I feel very sad, I would never get woken up by Jake excited at 5am on Christmas day.

'He almost looks at Christmas as being nonsense.

'There are times it does hit you, and you get a lump in your throat, it's just not fair for him.

Karen, his mother, 35, from Luton, said she faces a balancing act each Christmas to juggle her daughter Lucy's excitement with Jake's indifference. She told MailOnline: 'It breaks my heart'

'I feel he is missing out, but in reality he isn't. He doesn't realise what is going on, so can't really be missing out.

'I hope as he gets older he will start to understand and enjoy it more, but we just don't know.'

Mrs Quirke and her children are spending Christmas with her parents nearby in Luton.

It gives the 35-year-old a chance to spend some time enjoying the magic with Lucy while Jake, who adores her father, his grandfather, revels in spending time with his grandparents.

Mrs Quirke said she started to notice signs of autism in Jake when he was 18 months old.

WHAT IS AUTISM? Autism is a life-long developmental disability that affects how a person communicates with, and relates to, other people. It also affects how they make sense of the world around them. It is a spectrum condition, which means, while all people with autism share certain difficulties, their condition will affect them in different and unique ways. Some people with autism are able to live relatively indepdendent lives, but others may have additional learning disabilites and need a lifetime of specialist support. Advertisement

But the new mother faced a battle to persuade anyone to listen.

'To be honest I knew, when he was about 18 months, that he was a very anxious baby. He used to cry when we went anywhere. He didn't like new places, even at such an early age.

'People thought it was just him being clingy, but he was showing the signs of autism early on.'

By the time Jake was around 14 months old, he had yet to utter a word.

'He wasn't even trying to speak,' his mother told MailOnline.

'But no one would listen to me. It got to the point where I was badgering people, I wanted the health visitor to check him over.

'It does make me angry that for so long I was trying, but no one was listening.

'Jake couldn't hold crayons, he couldn't speak, I told her I thought he was showing the signs of autism.

'But her exact words were, "he is not lining up his toys, he's not sitting in the corner".

'For 10 months I was convinced, I didn't want to believe it.'

An NHS speech therapist told Mrs Quirke her son was delayed.

It wasn't until she sought a second opinion with a private speech therapist, that Jake was diagnosed.

Jake, seven, and his younger sister Lucy, five share a special bond. Mrs Quirke said her daughter gets the best out of her big brother, who is more like a four-year-old in terms of his development

While Jake shys away from opening Christmas presents, his little sister embraces the magic and excitement Christmas brings

'The NHS therapist didn't take us seriously,' she said. 'But he had no words, not even sounds. He didn't ever try to vocalise, he would just pull at you.

'I used to google "14 months not speaking", and the first thing that came up with autism.

'It took us 16 months to get someone to listen, Jake was failed a bit.'

Despite months of fighting to get health professionals to listen to her concerns, Mrs Quirke admitted, eventually hearing his diagnosis was 'overwhelming'.

'He was on the spectrum, and the paediatrician then showed me what autism was,' she told MailOnline.

HOW TO HAVE AN AUTISM-FRIENDLY CHRISTMAS... Preparation and routine - Plan and discuss everything with your child in advance, 'planned surpries' often work best - Stick to a regular Christmas Day routine, that you use each year - Have a countdown chart so your child can see what to expect, and note key events including decorating the tree, opening presents and when family will visit - Schedule some quiet time on Christmas Day itself Presents - Choose and wrap the presents with your child, no surprises reduces anxiety levels - Let your child choose the wrapping paper - Allow your child to open their presents gradually, even over a few days Decorations - Allow your child to choose the decorations and get them to help - If your child loves lights, put them on the ceiling rather than having a tree Food - Let your child choose what food to eat for Christmas dinner - If you're going to other people's homes make sure they have dinner ready on time to prevent a meltdown Source: Ambitious about Autism Advertisement

'When we got the diagnosis it was crushing. I felt relieved that people were finally listening to me, but my son had just been diagnosed with a life-long disabling condition.'

Mrs Quirke said while Jake, who goes to a special needs school, is on the spectrum, he has his own spectrum.

'He is very up and down,' she said. 'At times Jake is very autistic, while other days you barely know he has the condition.

'But at this time of year, we really notice it. Christmas is all about children and that's where my family struggle.

'He is lucky he doesn't have the challenging behaviour, throwing tantrums, that some with the condition suffer.

'He does suffer bad anxiety and has seen a clinical psychologist because for a while he could only make funny noises and would stick his fingers in his ears.

'He still has limited speech, he doesn't come home from school telling me anything about his day.

'He uses words for anything that motivates him. He will say things like "Oakley", a friend at school, and "happy".

He is delayed in general, he is more like a four-year-old than a seven-year-old and he doesn't play naturally.

'We are quite lucky, he does want to socialise with other children, but doesn't know how. He often gets too close, which is getting harder as he gets older.

'It is hard, I am starting to have to tell people he has autism, to try and help them understand.

'We were recently at B&Q and Jake walked up to a man, covered in tattoos on his arm, and he kept touching them, he was curious. But some people don't understand.

'He is a really loving little boy, we are lucky.

'I feel really close to him, like I have a total understanding of him, I can preempt things.

'He will sit and cuddle you for a long time, he doesn't push you away. He lines his toys up rather than plays with them, he plays to his own agenda.'

Mrs Quirke said it took 16 months before professionals listened and her son was diagnosed with autism

When Jake is out with his mother and family, he notes car registrations, sometimes returning home to list more than 20 he has spotted.

'He has a really photographic memory,' Mrs Quirke said.

She said the relationship between her children is 'special' and helps Jake tackle the challenges he faces as a result of his autism.

'They get on really well,' their mother said. 'Lucy is very bossy and likes to be in charge and mother him.

'Jake has always been the one who needs extra attention, and Lucy is amazing with him.

'He loves her so much. She really gets things out of him.

'He tends to listen to her more than anyone else, it is a very special relationship.'

'It is difficult, you have high-functioning autistic children, child geniuses, then you have very low functioning children, who bang their heads - there is not a lot of awareness of the in between,' she added.