Twelve mages met in a dimly-lit McMenamin’s Broadway on a rainy Saturday afternoon to battle it out, Two-headed giant style. For anyone who doesn’t know this format, it involves two-player teams with a shared life total, but separate hands and mana. For this event, the Power nine was banned (to provide parity to the field and also to boost deck creativity) but otherwise we played by Eternal Central rules.

I was tempted to go with a mono-green ramp build, with Ernies, Su-chis, and Juggs powered out by Llanowar Elves, Birds, and Mana Vaults, but my heart wasn’t in it. I have slowly been working on pimping out my UR “Machine Gun” deck, and I relished the chance to take it out for a spin. I thought it would be a mess without power, but I swapped in islands and Fellwar stones for the Moxes and Lotus, and Derelor, Bolt, and a second Icy for the power cards. I also dropped a Trike to lower the top end of my mana curve.

After choosing two-player teams by randomly picking from six matched pair of cards, teams Atog, Rocket Launcher, Dance of Many, Armageddon, Drain Life, and Rabid Wombat were set to do battle. my Horde teammate Aaron and I made up team Rocket Launcher. Aaron was rocking his sick-ass mono-black build, with underworld dreams and Juzams. After steeling myself for battle with a double shot of the house bourbon, I sat down with Aaron to do battle with team Atog.

Round 1 – UR Machine gun/mono-black vs. Arabian RUG/UWG Erhnamgeddon

Our first round was against Chris and Ben, on Arabian-heavy creature brews. Aaron got mana-screwed on one swamp with a handful of Hymns and fatties while I fought the good fight with Derelor and Su-chi. However, Serendib Efreet is a good card and even better when your opponents have three of them, and know how to use them. Team Rocket Launcher takes their first loss and I told Aaron to shuffle his deck a couple of extra times.

Round 1

Round 2 – vs. BRW dreams/mono-green

Round two was against the two dudes from Seattle who tripped down to ball some Portlanders. Quinn won the tournament during Grand Prix Portland, and he didn’t disappoint today. A well-timed Mind Twist on Aaron got his second swamp, and for the second time in two matches my partner got mana-screwed with a handful of killer cards. Daniel was on a interesting mono-green build and used Ashnod’s altar and elves to power out an early Force of Nature. After the force hit the table I gulped, top-decked an Icy manipulator, and ran around the bar high-fiving everyone. I proceeded to Fireball his elves, taking him off the ability to pay the upkeep for his Force. We passed the turn to team Rabid Wombat, thinking we were in the clear. However, I learned my first 2HG lesson of the day – Hurricane damages each player separately, even though they share a common team life total. Scott smartly sacked the Force to the Altar, and then sent a lethal Hurricane our way. Quinn added insult to injury by using Siphon Soul, a card I had to look up, to swing the game 8 points too. Team Rocket Launcher was now 0-2 and Aaron and I are openly arguing about dropping from our own tournament to go take shots at the bar.

Round 3 – vs. Mono-red big artifact/RG aggro

Next round we played local Legacy specialist Adam on a mid-range red/artifact build and Joseph on a personal favorite of mine, RG Aggro. Aaron finally got his deck rolling and his Underworld Dreams plus my Wheel of Fortune was enough to win us our first match. I wheeled away Joseph’s Urzatron lands, otherwise he was coming in for lethal with a big Earthquake. Super fun, swingy game, as Adam and I were both trying to power out big creatures with Mana vaults as fast as possible. Team Rocket Launcher had a breath of life left in them after all. I quickly grabbed a nitro Stout and a burger and prepare myself for round 4.

Round 4 – vs. UR & UW Tax/Tower control

Round 4 pitted Aaron and I against Carson with a UR build and Casey, who was rocking a UW control build around Ivory Tower and Land Tax. Casey couldn’t land any white mana, and Aaron’s Dreams took control of the game again. I remember Aaron playing a Juzam to put us in position to win, and Carson counterspelled it. I quickly threw down my one counter, Mana Drain, and started fist-pumping. I was already spending the mana in my head when Casey coolly laid down a Flash Counter for my Drain. Yes, $1 cards sometimes blow out $150 cards. Hats off to Casey for the patience, that was a baller move. No Disenchants for the Dreams, though, means bad dreams for Casey and Carson. Team Rocket Launcher is 2-2 and still live for second place. I stole Carson’s beer and got my mind right for the final round.

Round 4

Round 5 – vs. Turbofog / mono-green Stormseeker

In the last round Aaron and I faced off with old friends – Daniel on a GWB TurboFog build and Adam on his mono-green build around Howling Mine and Storm Seeker. Aaron and I got lots of creatures down but Daniel had an answer for everything – Fog, Darkness, Holy Day, Ivory Tower, Disenchant. Adam patiently put Howling Mines in play, filling our hands with cards and our hearts with fear. Aaron was able to whittle their life total down to the low teens and stuck an Dreams. I laid down a walk-off Wheel for 14 damage and Aaron and I hugged and chugged our beers.

We finished our day at 3-2, good for second play out of six teams, and we took home a pair of beta Disenchants for our efforts. More importantly, we raised over $140 for the Oregon Food Bank and had a wonderful afternoon of hanging out with old friends, making new friends, and slinging old cardboard. It is days like these that recharge my old school magic batteries. I can’t wait for my next tournament, and more importantly, I can’t wait to get home tonight and shuffle my power back into the machine gun.