CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT

Local business owner, Frank King-Creditze (50) has today proven that he is nothing more than a wealth-hoarding grub with no respect for what it means to be Australian.

According to Frank, his South Betoota-based mid-sized commercial construction company is more important that paying tribute to the late great Bob Hawke.

This comes after Australia’s 23rd prime minister died peacefully in his sleep yesterday, aged 89.

After waiting three-hours to hear from his apprentice, Braydeon (20) to show up to work, Frank finally cracked the shits and sacked him via text message.

“WTf r u doing you dum cunt” wrote Frank.

“You cant just pick n choose when you feel like working”

Jaydeon, however, says he literally thought he didn’t have to go to work today – after a lengthy conversation with his pop last night.

“The old fella was banging on about Hawkey and how he used to randomly tell the whole country they didn’t need to go to work whenever he felt there was something worth celebrating”

“So I just assumed today would be the same. I thought it was like Thailand when the King died. I’ve been at the casino all night”

Frank, however, says when it comes to the new shopping arcade in Betoota Heights – these fucken whirlybirds aren’t gonna install themselves.

“I’m sorry mate …. i gotta have to let you go. Some one els can easily do ur job” wrote Frank, in a treasonous declaration of his hatred for the workers

At time of press, Jaydeon was googling how to join the CFMEU while drinking a Milton Mango tallie at 11 in the morning.