On Tuesday’s KFC Radio I told the story of the time I went “over the hill” in Nassau to buy drugs, thought I was gonna get murdered as I was left in a car and had locals circling around me, then had someone knock on the window and hand me a Kalik. It was the most harrowing moment of my life followed by the best beer I’ve ever tasted. Nothing beats the “I was sitting in a hot car while buying drugs in a third world country, being stared at by people I’d stereotyped as dangerous but they ended up giving me a Kalik” beer. Today we decided to dive a little deeper and decide when the truly most delicious and satisfying moments for a beer are. There were some great recommendations since this morning: we’ve got the airport beer (“Termies” is what Donnie calls them and I just love that), the just came home from war and hadn’t drank in a year beer (shoutout Captain Cons and ZBT), the beer you have after helping a buddy move, grilling beer, shower beer, beach beer, ballpark beer, just got on vacation beer, after a men’s league game beer, and a litany of others.

5. Apres ski beer – it’s hard to be better than being outside, in the snow, drinking an ice cold beer after putting in a hard day’s work on the slopes. Beautiful view that makes you feel one with nature, snow bunnies running around, it’s just beautiful. There’s a reason why even non-skiiers know that apres ski is a thing, because it’s damn near perfect.

4. After work beer – This is rather cliche perhaps, but it’s gotta be on the list. The after work beer is the modern day punching of the clock for a white collar worker. The second you ingest some alcohol you are officially off duty. You had some concerns before, you brought some work shit with you out of the office, but once you touch belly to bar your mind is clear.

3. First beer of a party day – You know these beers and not because it’s the one we describe in the attached video. Birds are still singing, there’s a fog across the yard, you’ve got a bowl of cereal in front of you, it’s a morning beer. They’re amazing. The feeling when you drink this beer is how I imagine soldiers used to feel strapping up for war. You’re setting the tone, putting on some armor, and getting ready to unleash hell. It’s the calm before the storm and sets the tone for the whole day. I include first beer of a tailgate with this.

2. Yard work beer – One major stipulation of this: it’s gotta be your own yard. It doesn’t count if you’re a landscaper because then it’s just an after work beer. If you put on some dirty jeans and a white t, listen to classic rock, and get your hands dirty on your own property then it’s probably the best beer you’re ever gonna have in your life if you’ve never tried to buy drugs in the Bahamas. I’ve only had about 6 of these in my time on earth and I remember each of them like they were my first beer ever. I don’t care if it’s raking or shoveling or laying sod or putting up a fence or whatever, if you do hard labor on your own land then nothing beats that delicious alcohol you drink once you pop your shirt off and glisten in the sun while soaking up some rays.

1. See the start of this blog. So few people have had the “I was sitting in a hot car while buying drugs in a third world country, being stared at by people I’d stereotyped as dangerous but they ended up giving me a Kalik.” It’s extraordinarily exclusive and no one can tell me it’s not the best beer going.

The “I should’ve just died beer” >>>>>>>>>>>>