Commercial Success

Chapter 1: A Need To Update

Hello! I am Vifam—No, wait, that isn't right. I'm The Draigg! I'm not an obscure mech anime. If I was, that would raise a bunch of uncomfortable questions. Like, how can I write all this stuff? Or, how am I accessing the internet? Anyway, since I am a real person, those don't need to be asked. Instead, what we need to do is read this new story of mine! It's been a bit, but I can assure you, I'm still as sharp as ever. So, before we get started, let me just tell you the legal stuff. RWBY is owned by Rooster Teeth, and I don't own anything I mention in here. Only the storyline. If I did own anything I mention in here… Well, you know the deal already. You've heard the same thing plenty of times. So, without further ado, I present to you, Commercial Success! Let's feel that heat, baby!

xxx

(Zoom in on a still shot of the Beacon Academy campus, while inspirational synthesizer music plays constantly in the background. There are brightly colored, poorly animated geometric shapes bordering the view.)

"Have you ever wanted to make a difference in the world?"

(Fade to a bunch of hunters/huntresses in training, wandering the halls of Beacon.)

"Have you ever wanted to meet people just like you?"

(Cut to a bunch of spliced together interviews of Beacon Academy students.)

"I love it here!"

"I think I'm really making a difference!"

(Sudden jump cut to Ozpin's desk in his office. The desk chair dramatically spins around… To reveal a slightly younger Professor Ozpin. With an AWFUL attempt at a mullet haircut.)

"We here at Beacon Academy take pride in training the next generation of young men and women. That's why we want you… To make a difference!"

(Transition to a bunch of staged shots of students.)

"I'm here to make a difference!"

"I'm here to meet different people!"

"We're here to break down the walls of ignorance!"

"I'm here to make humanity proud!"

(Cut back to Ozpin at his desk.)

"Register your application to Beacon Academy today! Find the forms at your local post office, school, or government office! And, to keep up with the latest in technology, you can now send in your application by fax!"

(Quick cut to a fax machine with ugly graphics framing it, before cutting back to Ozpin, with the words "The future is now!" flashing below him.)

"Make a difference today!"

(Final cut to the front of the Beacon Academy main building, with Beacon Academy's phone number and address at the bottom of the screen. All the previous students are standing together, ready to cheer.)

"Go Beacon, Go Beacon, Go!"

xxx

Professor Ozpin silently thanked whatever god that listened that the tape was now over. Even though he had already had his regular amounts of daily coffee, he could start to feel a headache forming. To him, that old commercial was nothing short than a pure embarrassment. He should have never hired that advertising firm all those years ago. And the fact that it was still airing on television was slowly killing him inside.

"So, you understand my position," Ozpin finally said to the other person in the room.

"Absolutely," unhesitatingly replied Professor Goodwitch. Man, she was glad that she wasn't asked to be in that commercial. To have to witness Ozpin's disastrous attempt at a different haircut immortalized on tape was already enough of a punishment. It was even worse than she remembered. And she'd seen that rat's nest in person before.

"This clearly doesn't reflect our latest image. What we need is something to help bring in newer, brighter minds," Ozpin said, turning off the monitor.

"So, we're going to make a new commercial?" Goodwitch rhetorically asked.

"Indeed," Ozpin firmly answered.

"Want me to get the number of that ad agency?" offered Goodwitch. All she got was a cold look form Ozpin in response. "…Point taken."

"I don't want to deal with those hacks—I mean, that mediocre agency again," Ozpin curtly said.

Professor Goodwitch hummed. "Any suggestions?"

Ozpin adjusted his glasses in contemplation. Then, as if it was the obvious answer, he said, "We'll do it in-house."

"In-house?"

"In-house."

xxx

Velvet Scarlatina sighed as she fumbled with the keys to the Theater Club office. It was just another day in paradise to her. Not only did she need to put in more study time for her classes, but she was also starting to feel a little estranged form everyone. Even her teammates felt a little distant to her. Sure, they kept on inviting her to everything they did, but Velvet somehow found herself spending less and less time with them.

"Maybe I should hang out with them more…" Velvet lazily thought as she inserted the right key into the doorknob and undid the lock.

Pushing in the door, Velvet didn't even notice that the lights were already on in the office. And she most certainly didn't notice the guest already sitting behind her desk. Her mind was somewhere else at the moment. It wasn't until she tossed her book bag on the desk that she noticed that she had a special visitor in her office.

Velvet's eyes widened in surprise as she noticed Ozpin sitting at her desk calmly.

"Eep!" she squeaked in shock, before reflexively diving behind her guest chair.

Almost immediately afterwards, she quickly stood up and brushed off her clothes. "Y-you surprised me, sir," Velvet offered in apology.

"I'm terribly sorry for that, Ms. Scarlatina," said Ozpin, tapping his fingers against the armrest of the desk chair. "Perhaps I should've waited outside."

"No, no, it's fine," Velvet brushed off, sitting in the guest chair. Then, after a quick beat, she asked, "Wait, how did you get in here if the door was locked?"

Ozpin simply picked up his mug and took a sip. His other hand made a dismissive gesture as he drank his favorite coffee. Putting his mug back down, he breezily said, "That's not very important."

Leaning forwards onto the desk, Ozpin began to answer the question that Velvet already had on her mind. "I'm here because I want to request your… assistance."

"A-assistance?" Velvet stammered. One of the most powerful men on the planet wanted HER help? What was going on?

"I must say, when you put on that music show a while ago, I was most impressed. Clearly, you've proven that you're able to make something that can reach people of all types, right?" Ozpin began to elaborate.

"W-well, it wasn't all my work—" Velvet began, before being cut off by Ozpin.

"And so modest, too. Truly, you're a great Theater Club president," Ozpin continued, clearly stroking Velvet's sense of ego.

Naturally, Velvet latched onto such a comment. Her rabbit ears perked up fully at such a nice thing to say. "W-why, thank you sir!" she beamed. In fact, the blush she was starting to form from that compliment was downright luminous.

"That's why I want you to work on a special project for me," Ozpin said, cutting to the chase.

"A project?" Velvet parroted.

"That's right," Ozpin nodded. "I want you to make a video for me. You've seen the commercial that Beacon Academy puts out for recruitment, right?"

Velvet gave a small nod.

"We want to update it to reflect our new image. Plus, some of the information in that commercial is severely outdated. We need to show the world that we are, in fact, on the cutting edge of technology and education. So, if I give you the budget, supplies, and guidelines, do you think that you can make a commercial for us?" offered Ozpin, leaning back into the desk chair.

Velvet was nearly speechless. To her, this was like… she couldn't even think of a proper metaphor, she was so excited. No words could do justice to what she was currently feeling. "I-I-I'm honored, sir!" she managed to squeak out.

"Very well. Ms. Scarlatina, can I trust you to make me a great commercial, one I can put on the air to thousands, if not millions?" challenged Ozpin.

In the back of his mind, Ozpin was slightly surprised that Velvet was this easy to manipulate. He was almost expecting to have her ask for a cash payment or something along those lines. Well, he figured that she was too caught up in the romance of making something great for the school to think about that. After all, given some of the letters and reports he'd received from her before, Velvet was really desperate to make her productions good and enjoyable.

"I won't let you down, sir!" Velvet declared, trying her best not to start bouncing up and down in her chair in excitement. And no, it wasn't because she was a rabbit Faunus. It would be incredibly racist to think such a thing.

"Now that's what I like to hear," Ozpin thinly smiled. Picking up his mug, he then stood up from the desk. "You'll have everything you need sent to you shortly. Expect everything before the end of the week."

"I swear, I'll do my best, Professor!" gushed Velvet. This was just so exciting for her! She was practically quaking in her shoes from the thrill of it all!

Ozpin broadened his grin at Velvet. "I know you will, Ms. Scarlatina. We're all expecting great things from you,". At that, Ozpin calmly strolled out of the small office, and down the hallway.

Velvet remained frozen in place, almost unable to even comprehend such an opportunity like this. It was incredible! It was amazing! It was… incredimazing!

Unable to control herself, a large squee began to build up from the bottom from Velvet's throat. "eeeeeeeeeEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" she couldn't help but vocalize. Even though she didn't know it, dozens of other Faunus students in the general area began to feel a sudden pain starting at their ears, as if a high-grade dog whistle was being blown. It was a good thing that Velvet was riding the high of the hype train, otherwise she would have felt it as well.

Fortunately for everyone in the immediate vicinity, her lungs gave out their last stores of oxygen before her screech could start to break glass. However, Velvet felt like she needed to say something, ANYTHING to describe how she felt at that moment.

Clenching her fists up in victory, she began to rant to herself: "Wow! Unreal! My gosh! THIS IS AMAZING! I FEEL INCREDIBLEEEEEE! YES, YES, YES, YES! I CAN WIN! I FEEL GREAT! I CAN DO THIS! AUGGGHHHHHHHH!"

If anyone heard that completely stupid outburst, then thankfully they weren't around to voice their clear and obvious displeasure. It was a good thing that Velvet wasn't nailed for that, otherwise it would have distracted her, and ruined her good mood entirely.

Hopping merrily over to her desk, Velvet could hardly contain herself as she reached into her book bag and pulled out her scroll. Opening it to DustTube, she immediately began to search for all sorts of material to base a commercial on.

She watched all sorts of advertisements and PSA's. From mesothelioma lawyer ads (didn't a few students get that a few years ago?), to children's cereal commercials (one with a guest appearance from Pyrrha Nikos!), and even an anti-drug PSA where a kid claimed that he learned to roll a joint from watching his dad (for Velvet, it was harrowing stuff). Yes… now she knew what she needed to do.

Velvet needed to make something that was commercials incarnate. She needed to make something that would appeal to every demographic, every person across the board! This was going to be something that people would applaud at for its strength, and cry over how touching it could be! Velvet was going to direct the SHIT out of this commercial!

Commercial after commercial, video after video, Velvet's mind soared higher and higher. She had the major backing that she needed. She knew a bunch of talented people that would be willing to work for almost next to nothing, and most importantly, she could use this not only as a way to boost her own talents, but also get closer to her teammates. Truly, this project was like mana being dropped down from the heavens onto her!

With anxious fingers, Velvet then logged out of DustTube, and opened her contacts list on her scroll. Yes, yes, this was the roster that was needed. All of these people could help. They could act! They could sing! And they were already great friends, so they would do this without any major hesitation! They were going to help her make gold for the general populace! Before long, Velvet was trying to type out the perfect text message, to tell them of the wonderful opportunity that was handed to all of them.

So, to put all of the above into simpler words, Velvet was excited for this project. Very, very excited indeed.

xxx

And I bet all of you are, too! Well, I'd hope so, anyway. After all, writing, and by extension art in general, can be very subjective. Hell, I've seen a lady pissing in a soup can be considered art. But, given that at least some of the stuff I write is moderately popular, I can only assume that all of you will like my latest comedy piece. So, enjoy it while it's hot! Oh, and be sure to say thanks to my good pal, Falcyon, for suggesting this title! I think it has a nice ring to it, personally.

So, until next time, this is The Draigg, signing off for now!