It’s time to move on from derby names

This will undoubtedly be the most unpopular post I’ve ever made on this blog. But, if I didn’t feel it, I wouldn’t say it. It’s time to move on from derby names.

Picking out a tough derby name has been a long standing tradition in our sport. Newbies look forward to it more than even playing in their first bout. I’ve seen people take more time picking their name than they do the protective padding that will ultimately save them from terrible injuries. Derby names need to go the way of old school derby. Back when our sport was fake, overly theatrical, and at best, a sideshow.

There’s been lots of talk in derby PR circles about players taking names that are sexually suggestive, gross, or a just not family-friendly. Why should this be something that derby needs to concern itself with? Leaders of teams shouldn’t have to spend any time deciding whether a skater’s name is appropriate for the masses. It’s just wasted time.

If you’re a skater, wouldn’t you rather get recognition for yourself and not your derby persona? It’s YOU putting the work in every practice. It’s YOU sacrificing your body for the good of our sport. Wouldn’t you rather young kids come up to you and say “I love you Susie Smith!” rather than “I love you Killer Krusher!”

During the 2011 WFTDA Championships, a jammer for the Kansas City Roller Warriors was called by her real name. The jammer formerly known as Snot Rocket is now just Kelley Young. And it sounded awesome. It sounded right. It sounded legitimate.

Lots of people talk about roller derby needing to be taken seriously as a sport. Let’s be honest, aside from derby’s past, the other great hurdle that people use to discredit derby is the use of derby names. You want to be called a real athlete, but you don’t use a real name? What are we then, pro wrestling? Pro wrestling gets tens of thousands of fans to come to events. They use fake names. So clearly, they’re doing something right, right? No. People walk into a pro wrestling match knowing that the events they are about to watch are not only predetermined, but they are carefully choreographed. Pro wrestling is fake, roller derby is not.

Let’s lift up the women that make this sport what it is to a higher level. Let’s make them stars by their birth names. Let’s stop performing incredible athletic feats behind fake names. Let’s take a page from Race City in Charlotte and use our real names when competing.

Even though I’m not a player, I will still practice what I preach. From this day forward, I’m retiring my derby name, “ExploSean.” I will no longer use it as part of my activity in roller derby. I’m proud of my name and proud of this sport. I’m no longer going to hide behind a false name just because “it’s what we’ve always done.” I hope that the rest of derby can some day follow suit.