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Sam the Robot? In 100 Words or Less

My boys and I are at Longview Barber Shop, getting our hair cut and talking about food. Merry the barber says, "Well everyone likes pizza." I point to ten-year-old Sam and said, "He doesn't." Sam piped up, "The cheese is too stringy!" Merry asked Sam if he was a robot or something. Sam firmly declared that he wasn't. Merry asked him how he knew for sure. He said he went into the water and didn't see any sparks.

Matthew and the Moon In 100 Words Or Less



Six-year-old Matthew and I were watching the Reds' game on TV. The scene switched from the game to a view of the full moon. Matthew asked if that was the same moon we see. I asked him how many moons the earth had. He replied, "One." So we agreed it was the same moon.



A moment later, concern clouded his face. "Dad," he asked, "There is a planet with eight moons, is that a problem?" He was relieved when I told him I thought it was OK.



Rachel and Andrew In 100 Words or Less



Rachel and Andrew rarely spoke except to exchange insults.



Last fall, Andrew's middle school football team was honored before the high school game. Andrew called out to Rachel, a high school cheerleader, as he passed. She shouted back, "Hi Andrew!" She was excited that her little brother acknowledged her in front of his friends.



After they passed, Andrew elbowed his buddies, "See, I told you." They grudgingly admitted that she really must be his sister.





The Reluctant Helper In 100 Words or Less Luke did not want to help put the toys away at preschool, and told his teacher Miss Alyssa so - very emphatically. Miss Alyssa relayed the exchange to Lisa when she picked up Luke later that day. Lisa asked Luke about it, and he denied refusing to clean up. Lisa persisted, and Luke finally exclaimed, "You can't hear me way over here!" - meaning while he was at preschool. Lisa told him that she hears everything. Luke gave Lisa his squinty-eyed look and processed the information - he is always thinking.

Available for Kindle -- A Pirate Named Molly - 56 Limericks For Kids



Too Much Disney Channel In 100 Words or Less



Many Disney television programs feature "cool" kids and oblivious parents. Preteens, especially, internalize this dynamic. Mimicking their Disney heroes means my preteens' behavior does not always meet my expectations. I accept the occasional struggle, though, since I do allow some Disney watching.



Recently, my twenty-three-year-old son was talking to my six-year-old. Zach - do you want me to take you to the zoo? Sam - Why? Zach - To see the animals. Sam - That's what tv is for. Zach - Are you kidding me? Sam (grinning) - Sarcasm!



I'd never even heard the word "sarcasm" when I was six.













I Know I Am Getting Older, But . . . In 100 Words or Less



"Me gotta go potty!" three-year-old Daniel shouts. We are eating at Bob Evans. I get up immediately. With Daniel, you have about 17 seconds to get where he needs to be. We make it in time and finish our meal.



I grab a dessert menu and reach into my shirt pocket for my glasses. Nothing. I look everywhere. I ask if anyone has seen them. Daniel proclaims, "Here they are!" I ask where he found them. Laughing, he points to his bottom. They fell out of my pocket and into his underwear when I pulled up his pants.



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In 100 Words Or Less Andrew The Rock Star



Five-year-old Matthew always admired his ten-year-old brother Andrew. If Andrew wore a Buckeye jersey, so did Matthew. Ask Matthew what he wanted for breakfast and he would reply, "What did Andrew have?"



One evening, this admiration became near veneration. On the way home from football practice, Andrew pulled a loose tooth. At home, Andrew showed Matthew the pulled tooth, and the resulting blood on his jersey. But Andrew wasn't done - he had another loose tooth - and he yanked it out right in front of a wide-eyed Matthew.



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About Me Randy Author of A PIRATE NAMED MOLLY - 56 Limericks for Kids and A PUMPKIN NAMED LILLY - 56 More Limericks for Kids. View my complete profile

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