My grandmother was a painter and sculptor who used to work in the garage. I remember watching her finish a piece of art. I was in diapers observing her and she was smoking with the sunlight coming in. She was a trailblazer. She could also play the piano and was a classy dresser; it's because of her I always take pride in the way I look. My brother Jason is gay, and at an early age I grew a dislike for bullies. Jason is two years older than me but I am bigger and always took on a protective role. I got my ass kicked a number of times and I was always proud to do it when it was in defence of our family name. I had a girlfriend called Melanie when I was four in preschool. She was from Hawaii. One day we started playing doctors and nurses: I'll show you mine if you show me yours. I got in trouble for telling Melanie to lift up her skirt; my parents got called in. She ended up being the first girl I kissed. I started my first band, Kyuss, at 13. It was because of my love of music that I felt attracted to strong girls. I loved Poison Ivy of the Cramps and Chrissie Hynde and was lucky to become friends with them later. I loved Raquel Welch and Sophia Loren, and had a huge crush on pinup Bettie Page. I learnt about strength and sexuality by seeing her amazing photo shoots with Bunny Yeager.

I never had steady girlfriends in high school. We'd be friends in the day, and at night they'd become something more. This intimacy helped me understand women more and have sturdy relationships later on in life. As a travelling musician you can't have a serious relationship with anyone until you are ready. I never pretended to give something I couldn't and I was never afraid to leave a bad situation. My Australian wife, Brody Dalle [front woman of the Distillers], can spit 30 feet and punch like a guy. She is my punk-rock dream girl. I always thought if I could go out with a chick with a mohawk who also read philosophy, I'd be winning. Brody is the real deal. She does everything the boys can do and a whole slew of things no boy ever could. I met Brody when she was 17 and I was 23. It was her first day in the US after relocating from Melbourne and I was playing guitar in the Screaming Trees. She came up to me backstage and asked if I was in Kyuss. We talked for an hour and a half and I never forgot her. I didn't like her ex [Tim Armstrong from Rancid], so I lied and said I had made out with her in the hope that he would find out. I didn't see her again until seven years later.