I’m furious right now. I’m a bit too angry to write as coherently as I’d prefer. You know I’ve been through hell since publicly disclosing my rape. You know I have little tolerance for “advocates” who tell us that male survivors don’t matter, trivialize our struggles and mock us for speaking out. Everytime some conservative asshat says something idiotic or hateful about female survivors, “advocates” try to play the “men don’t get victim-blamed” trump card.

Now, another man who went public is being treated like garbage while “allies” are still saying we don’t get victim-blamed.

I was written about at PajamasMedia and then subjected to HUNDREDS of hateful, mocking comments by knuckle-draggers assholes and women who think they are qualifed to say erections = consent. Then several bloggers joined in. I was able to elict a few apologies, but most laughed it off as no big deal.

THIS IS WHY MALE SURVIVORS STAY SILENT:

Then I went on the HuffPostLive. The hosts treated me with dignity and respect. The viewers were fucking savages.

THIS IS WHY MALE SURVIVORS STAY SILENT:

Then, an advice blogger told me I was a liar, mocked me and laughed openly about my rape. She’s a real specimen of humanity. I don’t care how many times she apologizes. It will never be enough. What she said was inexcusable.

THIS IS WHY MALE SURVIVORS STAY SILENT:

Then, the fucking demons at The Lesbian Mafia mocked me, lied about my experience, promoted a ton of rape myths and overall left me triggered and in panic attacks for over a month. They still have a gigantic following and I’ve yet to see the “men don’t get victim-blamed” advocates take them to task.

THIS IS WHY MALE SURVIVORS STAY SILENT:

Now, a young man (about my age when I was raped) reported his rape to the police. Twitter, Reddit and Facebook users responded with mockery, disbelief and outright jokes. People are still saying male rape survivors don’t get victim-blamed.

THIS IS WHY MALE SURVIVORS STAY SILENT:

This is how Rosie DiManno decided to respond – with mockery, jokes and outright humiliation of the male rape survivor.

“They could be sex molls or sex maulers.”

Or Rosie could have called them rapists instead of trying to be cutesy.

“Of course, one man’s sexual assault is another man’s sexual fantasy come true.”

Yeah, cuz appealing to the knuckle-draggers sells papers, right Rosie?

“Sexual assault, you say? Lucky guy others say, nudge-nudge, a fivesome and didn’t even have to pay for it.”

Yeah, I’m sure this man feels “lucky”. I ‘m so happy you are around to put it all into perspective for male rape survivors. The Star should be very proud. Pardon me while I vomit yesterday’s, tomorrow’s and next week’s lunches.

THIS IS WHY MALE SURVIVORS STAY SILENT:

The next time you screw up your mouth to arrogantly proclaim that male survivors don’t get victim-blamed, just think for a second. It isn’t true. It doesn’t look identical and it isn’t about clothing (as if that was the full sphere of victim-blaming for ANY survivor), but it exists just the same. If you are promoting this myth, you are 100% part of the problem.

It is time for a lot of people to look in the mirror.

About James A. Landrith



James Landrith is a healing rape survivor, public speaker, internationally syndicated blogger, civil liberties activist and the notorious editor and publisher of The Multiracial Activist (ISSN: 1552-3446) and The Abolitionist Examiner (ISSN: 1552-2881). Landrith can be reached by email at: james@jameslandrith.com or at his personal website/blog.