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Ruth Bader Ginsburg is Gonesburg, the Pelosi Pooper calls in, Madcucks returns ridin’ with Biden, Netflix previews “Real Steel”, gun shopping in California, Danny Polishchuk and jokes and anti-Semitism, life-affirming herpes, my favorite restaurant closes down, Mario 64 is too hard, dating your therapist, and busting an anti-porn crusader in real time; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

A new bonus crossover episode is here! Karl, Sean, and I talk devil dots and carbuncles as we review, “Life with Herpes”. If you don’t have herpes, then I feel bad for you, because apparently it’s the most life-affirming, self-actualizing, breaking-out-of-your-shell inducing viral infection of pustules you can get while completely following all safe sex practices. Who would have thunk! Learn more with us at Patreon.com/TheDickShow, but first…

“It’s a nice car,” says the car salesman. “She’ll get you five hundred miles to the gallon. Doors are un-dingable. Retail value only goes up. You can fit a whole family in the front seat. It’ll tow a building. The car believes in God and is a just and righteous car. There’s just one problem…”

“What’s that?” you say.

“If some old cunt dies, the whole thing stops working.”

“Stops working? Just because some old cunt dies?”

“That’s right.”

“That sounds like a pretty big problem,” you say.

“Nah, not really,” says the salesman. “I mean sure, the wheels fall off, the brakes don’t work, the steering wheel is decorative–it’s got auto-drive; very cool. The paint cracks in patterns that spell out slurs and slanders, you friends will hate you, you can’t get an abortion, the concept of justice halts, and systemic issues cascade into critical failure points that make the car un-driveable, your life unlivable, and potentially undermine every single aspect of what you understand to be your basic freedoms–what you’ve built your life on, but otherwise, it’s a great car. Look at how much debt you can fit in the trunk!”

“Sorry, this is a car, right?” you say.

“Yeah, pretty much,” says the salesman.

“Can I drive another car while all that is happening?” you say.

“No. Again…auto-drive. It’s bad ass. Auto-drive, auto-locks, auto-brakes; mid-drive refueling no matter what, no matter where, by force. If you tried to get out, you’d be killed. You and your family. And their kids if they have any. Their futures would be destroyed.”

“Huh,” you say. “What about this old cunt? Can we swap her out before–”

“Before she dies?” he interrupts, “Nah. I mean we could, but they never do. Old cunts, am I right?”

The salesman joshes you.

“It’s no big deal. Seriously, we do it all the time. We find another old cunt and everything goes back to normal. You won’t even notice it! Some people even think it’s fun!”

You laugh.

“We find a younger one the next time, right?” you joke

“No.” says the salesman. “So what do you think? You interested in this fucking car? Or does it sound like a really shitty and stupid design that no one would buy into? Who would even run a car like this? Let alone an entire country.”

Madcucks returns with “Batman Begins Decoded” and his support for Joe Biden!



“No Mask” by Todd Seidel



And here is the Rose Kalemba video. It’s an interesting topic. It might be an interesting watch for some. People want to take PornHub down. I don’t agree with any of them, and some are certainly lying. That’s just how attention works.



Thumbnail THROWBACK by PixelHenkie



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