In Guayaquil, Ecuador, Lorena Erazo searched Facebook for an American professor who had taught at her university. But when she typed in his name, Mark MacLean, dozens of possibilities popped up. Impatiently, she clicked on a few for friend requests and hoped the right one would respond.

In Markham, Ont., Mark MacLean, a professional training and coaching consultant, was puzzled by the friend request from Ecuador. But he often met new people at networking events, so he sent his standard polite reply asking for help remembering how he knew her.

After genial exchanges, they realized they were strangers. But intrigued strangers.

She liked his friendly tone and his black-and-white photo. “I thought, ‘Hmm, I wonder if he has blue eyes,’” recalls Lorena. He enjoyed her playful replies. Besides, he’d also seen her Facebook photo: the long dark hair, lovely eyes and warm smile.

“Yes, the picture,” says Mark, giving a big thumbs up sign.

That was May 20, 2009: a short flurry of messages. It could easily have ended there. But against long odds, they would come to bridge the 5,000 kilometres between them. It took three years, pitted with many obstacles, but Lorena and Mark are now married, having built a life together out of a chance encounter in cyberspace.

The lead-up

After that first out-of-the-blue connection, Lorena and Mark became Facebook friends. Several weeks later, Lorena, hoping to learn French abroad, asked Mark if he knew of any Quebec programs.

He didn’t, but that got them messaging, first on Facebook, then Skype. Occasional contact grew to daily exchanges. Both Lorena and Mark were single and not dating anyone.

“He was very smart and entertaining, although I didn’t always catch his sense of humour. I blamed my English,” says Lorena, now 35.

“She was an amazing friend, helpful and supportive. She’s whip-smart,” says Mark, 39.

Frustrated with messaging, she called him on Skype. “When I heard his voice for the first time, ah, it was amazing. I loved his voice. I actually felt this warm feeling through my body,” she recalls with a broad smile.

Graduating to video Skype, they shared their lives, albeit through pixels.

In the evenings, they’d work together, via computer screen. She was teaching English and planning a business in Ecuador and he had his consulting jobs here.

They advised each other on all sorts of matters. As she prepared to go out with friends, she held up clothes to show Mark: “What do you think of this outfit?”

And they had fun. They’d watch downloaded and streamed movies together. “I saw her cry, that’ll melt your heart,” says Mark.

Once, when he lost a bet with her, he had to prepare a nice dinner and eat it by candlelight as she watched.

When he told her he had a date, Lorena says she wasn’t jealous, but disappointed. This friendship, or whatever it was, was more enjoyable if he were available. His date, however, was a dud — he told Lorena all about it.

Going offline

For his birthday in December, she sent several presents, including a top-of-the-line webcam to replace his poor-quality one. “I wanted to see if his eyes were blue,” she remembers with a laugh. “I love blue eyes.” She thought it rude to ask outright.

By February 2010, they were spending four hours a night together in the ether. “I’d get up in the morning and my mother would say, ‘Why are you so tired? You went to your room early,’ ” remembers Lorena, who kept the cyber-relationship secret. Her mother wouldn’t approve and friends would be skeptical.

Mark also stayed mum, although once friends did drop in when Lorena was on the screen. She waved from Ecuador.

Lorena had applied to a French-language program in Quebec, and the two were excited at the prospect. But Lorena didn’t get in — she hadn’t done the visa application correctly. “I was devastated,” says Mark, who vowed he’d somehow visit Ecuador. Then mana from Ottawa: His tax return arrived.

They revealed their online connection and news of the upcoming visit to family and friends and got similar responses, versions of “Are you crazy?”

Lorena’s mother peppered her with questions, including “What if he’s a bad guy?”

“Ohhh, it was a long conversation with my mother,” recalls Lorena.

On July 5, 2010, Mark’s plane landed in Guayaquil. “I was ridiculously excited,” he remembers. “I started posting on Facebook and was one of the last people off the plane.”

Meanwhile, Lorena stood waiting, sweating in the heat, worried about her makeup, growing alarmed as other passengers filed by. “I thought, he didn’t come,” she remembers. “I was so nervous. I’m shaking right now just thinking about it.”

Then, suddenly, he was in front of her, all six feet and one inch of him. “Oh my God, he’s really tall.” That was her first thought. They had no sense of height from Skype. But tall was good, explains five-foot-five Lorena.

Then he came closer and she looked straight at his eyes. “Oh my God, he’s got blue eyes.” She’d never been sure.

He stood there soaking in the sight of her. Skype hadn’t lied. “I remember him looking me up and down,” says Lorena, “and I could see a sparkle in his eyes.”

She moved in for a hug. He moved in for a kiss. “Not in front of people,” she demurred. In the privacy of the parking lot, they kissed for the first time.

The whirlwind

With Lorena translating, Mark met her family and passed approval. Over the next 18 days, Mark and Lorena found they operated well together and went surfing, whale-watching, zip-lining. They actually sat side-by-side to watch a movie. “It was like seeing the 3D version of him,” says Lorena. “It felt like a gift.”

And then it was over. At the airport, they both cried.

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Back on Skype, they brainstormed how to be together, anywhere. Eventually, Lorena found a postgraduate international business program at Toronto’s Centennial College. They hired a lawyer to help with the visa application.

Then life threw them a curveball. Mark was offered a great job — in Winnipeg. Lorena encouraged him to take it. She hadn’t been accepted yet and didn’t want him to forego a career opportunity.

By January, 2011, there they were: Lorena, visa-approved, in Toronto, and Mark in Winnipeg, soon transferred to Edmonton. So close, yet so far — and still on Skype.

They flew back and forth whenever they could. By November, he’d taken a job in Markham and they were finally together. Mark proposed the day before Valentine’s, 2012.

Three weddings

Nothing, however, is easy for them. They needed three weddings: a Canadian civil one (March, 2012) and an Ecuadorian civil wedding, performed in Markham by Ecuador’s consul general (July, 2012). That ceremony was required before their big church wedding (July, 2013) in Ecuador.

Now they’re settled, sitting next to each other on the couch in their Markham townhouse. She’s employed as a corporate program co-ordinator and he’s doing administrative work as well as running his consulting business. Their seven-month-old miniature schnauzer, Charro, competes for their attention.

“I believe all the obstacles we went through were a test of whether we are good partners,” says Lorena. “When we have issues, we really support each other. We say, ‘Don’t worry. We’ll figure it out.’”

“Yes, we say that, ‘We’ll figure it out,’” says Mark, smiling at Lorena. In person.

How they made contact

From: Mark MacLean

Hey Lorena,

Anytime I get a message from someone I don’t immediately

recognize I send them a quick note just like this one asking …

Do I know you?

If I’ve forgotten our connection, please forgive me, (and remind

me), if not, (I’m always interested in meeting new people and) I’m

curious …

How did you find me? And

What prompted the Facebook friend request?

Let me know, and thanks.

Mark

From: Lorena Erazo

You just made me laugh!!!!! No we don’t know each other. Don’t worry.

I sent an invitation because I was looking for my teacher whose

name is Mark MacLean. But then appeared like a thousand of them,

so I was really sad and I invited all of them to see if my

teacher can recognize me.

Thanks for your message, it was sweet.

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