Chapter Text

Frisk woke up in a panic, and the voice in their head wasn't far behind them.

A cold sweat broke out across their body, heart pounding and their every muscle tensing to run. They were already halfway out of bed before they realized everything was fine. They were in their room, on the surface. Toriel was just down the hall. Everyone was fine. No one was going to hurt them. Not again.

They said these things to themself a few times, shaking and uncomfortable. They were safe. They were safe. That didn't make the feeling of danger go away. The imagery of the nightmare was fading fast, but the hands, the darkness, the... eyes on the back of their neck...

It didn't help that mornings like this made them feel in double.

Somewhere in the back of their head was another person who'd also woken up from a nightmare. They could always sense them; not always as crystal clear as their own feelings were, but always present. It was a bit like seeing shadows through foggy glass. It was clear enough today, though. Chara was scared too.

They wondered idly whose nightmare it had been. They usually shared dreams, and many of the worse flashbacks they had came from bad memories they'd shared together. They had shared the sensation of being run through by dozens of magic spears, and of being burned alive, and of having the life choked out of them by a psychotic flower god... but the nightmares from times they hadn't shared together weren't any better.

Frisk wrapped their arms around themself, taking a long, deep breath. They were fine. They were safe. Having finished talking to themself, they hesitantly reached out to address Chara.

"H-Hey. It's okay. We're fine."

Chara was silent. Technically speaking, so was Frisk. They'd long since perfected a way of talking to each other entirely in their head. They couldn't read each other's thoughts, but they could sort of think vividly at each other in a way that was almost like having a real conversation. Over time they'd even learned how to pick up on each other's tone and feeling. You learned a lot about reading someone when they lived in your head and were never separate from you.

When Chara spoke it was with a crisp, almost cold tone of voice. "...of course we're fine. It was a just a bad dream, Frisk. You know better than to dwell on them."

"Of course I do. But that doesn't change the way we feel. I'm just saying-"

"We have already said too much about it. Stop moping like a child and get up. Get ready for school. Being late will not make your day better."

Frisk felt a spike of frustration at that, but said nothing as they got up and started getting ready. Damn it. They knew the other human felt just as freaked out on mornings like this as they did. They were trying to comfort them! But Chara just couldn't handle feeling like a child, could they? And they always had to take charge.

Stomping down the stairs they found an empty kitchen, breakfast consisting of a covered pot on the stove appended with a note from Toriel. The note took five paragraphs to explain that due to something or other at school that Frisk didn't care about she needed to leave early. It took another two paragraphs to warn them that while the meal had been carefully prepared with fire magic, they still needed to properly make sure the pot was cool before touching it. They rolled their eyes at their adoptive mother's protectiveness before promptly burning their hands on the stove top.

Adding insult to literal injury the pot was full of oatmeal, which was one of the very few foods in the world that Frisk despised. They wolfed down about half a bowl before irritably setting out on the short walk to school.

"...and Frisk could tell it was going to be a horrible, terrible, no good, very bad day," Chara quipped. It did nothing to improve Frisk's mood, and they furrowed their brow to try to make that point.

"Don't be like that," Chara sighed. "I'm just telling you to stop brooding. It isn't like you."

"I'm allowed to be in a bad mood, Chara."

"I'm not in a great mood myself," they snapped. "But being a broody crybaby has never fixed anything."

"It's not being a crybaby to think about what you're feeling!"

Chara sniffed, but didn't have an immediate response. There was a pause as they trudged on before they spoke again, changing the subject. "Looks like it's going to rain."

"Of course it is," Frisk grumbled in response.

"You should pick up the pace. Last thing we need is to catch another cold."

"You're never gonna let that one go, are you?"

"You played in the rain for two hours, and for two weeks we couldn't breathe through our nose. I was convinced I was stuck in another deathbed."

"Alright, alright, drop it," Frisk groaned. "I'm speedrunning my way to school. Are you happy?"

"Rarely. But at least you're being reasonable."

The nerve to talk about being reasonable, from them. Frisk bit their tongue—figuratively speaking—and headed to school.

School did little to improve their day. The sight of their friends did cheer them up to some extent. Monster Kid gave them his usual smile and greeting before hurrying off to class. Their human friends like Jenny and Alex had the time to stop and chit-chat briefly, but algebra was thrashing everyone's collective asses and most of them just weren't in the mood to chit-chat. They could feel relief from Chara's side of their brain, which only managed to annoy them further. Chara never wanted to socialize. They'd gotten their way without even having to try today. It wasn't entirely fair, but they added it to their running tally of annoying Chara moments for the day.

"Algebra's starting."

"I know that, Chara."

"You're not moving like you know that. You realize Toriel doesn't take it easy on us if we're late or fail."

"I know that better than you. I'm the one actually doing the class."

"Oh really?" Chara asked, sounding partially indignant. ""If you're the one always 'doing' the class, why am I always having to re-explain the Distributive Property to you?"

Frisk plopped themself down in a chair as class begun, barely paying any attention.

"'Cause I'm stupid, I guess. At least let me fail on my own terms."

"You're going to if you keep arguing with me when you should be paying attention."

"I-"

"Quiet, Frisk. Listen."

An absolutely seething Frisk sat through algebra with a smug presence in the back of their head. They spent more time in the class meandering through their own angry thoughts than really listening, and were mostly lost when they were given worksheets to fill out before the bell.

Well, what they lacked in mathematical ability they made up for in determination. They plowed through as best they could, and it was distracting from the lingering tension they still felt from this morning.

"X equals 15?" Chara asked skeptically. "No. Read the problem again."

Aaaand they were back to the tension. Frisk's hand tightened around their pencil, and they stubbornly moved on to the next problem without double checking.

"You got it wrong," Chara insisted. "Go back and do it again."

Frisk continued to ignore them.

"Oh, fine. If you are too lazy to do it over again I will just tell you the answer. X equals-"

"I'm not changing it."

"...why not."

"Because I don't have to."

"This is childish, Frisk."

They were pretty sure they knew the answer to the next problem, but they wrote it in wrong anyway to prove a point. Chara's internal groan of frustration filled them with... well, not satisfaction, or even happiness, but something that put a thin smile on their face.

"You make it so very hard to help you."

"People should stop trying," Frisk retorted.

"What am I supposed to do? Just let you fail?"

"Yes!"

"No!"

"It's my choice!"

"Your choices suck ass!"

"And yours don't matter! The name on the sheet is 'Frisk.' If Frisk is a failure at algebra, than this sheet is gonna be a failure at algebra. The end. No more arguing."

Now it was Chara's turn to stew, something in their emotions stinging slightly. Whatever. Frisk grit their teeth and half-assed the rest of their worksheet.

They day progressed the same way its every moment had gone. Frisk dragged their feet from class to class, feeling on edge and irritable. Chara piped down for a little while, but eventually it seemed they couldn't help themself and started 'helping' again. Frisk would rather get stabbed.

Everything about this day made them wish they hadn't gotten out of bed. Everything made them feel angry, stupid, or both. Everything made them want to cry.

But... eventually... the school day ended. That chapter of their day was behind them now, and they could look forward to spending the rest of it with their friends. That always recharged them after a day like this.

The day had even cleared up from its rainy beginnings—maybe they could get some nice outside time in after all. They made their way to a park bench and pulled out their phone, tapping to get into their texting contacts.

They'd done it. They'd made it this far with their sanity intact.

At least until the voice in their head picked another fight.

"What are you doing?" Chara asked suddenly, sounding both suspicious and alarmed. "Are you texting MK?"

Frisk glared at nothing in particular. Glaring directly at someone who only lived in their head was pretty hard, after all. "Yeah, I'm texting MK. And I think Jenny and Alex while I'm at it."

"You are going to kill us both," Chara said, tone matter of fact. "Aren't you stressed enough without trying to cram your social life in on top of everything else?"

"What's so stressful about a social life?"

"Everything."

"Maybe for you," Frisk said with a huff. "But for me it's relaxing and it's all that's kept me going all day, so I'm going to hang out with my friends. Is that okay, your highness?"

"I am not royalty," Chara snapped. "I just don't want to listen to those brats yelling over each other for the next five hours."

"They're not brats. They're all fourteen, just like us."

"Well they act four. They're exhausting."

"You can just ignore them then. No one's asking you to do anything but let me have my social life!"

"I can't just ignore those shrieking gremlins. They press all around us and want to gossip. My head's too full of algebra to deal with that."

Frisk grit their teeth. They always bickered with Chara from time to time, but for some reason today it was more infuriating than usual. "Stop trying to grade my work in real time and it won't tire you out so bad."

"If it's not me pointing out your mistakes it will be remedial math classes. Also, you mean 'so badly.'"

"Why are we doing this?" Frisk was fuming by now, the exhaustion and stress of the day finally getting the better of them. They could feel Chara as a strong stubborn presence in the back of their skull. "Can't I text my friends without getting judged by a know-it-all ghost?"

"Can't we just have a quiet day for once? We need to recharge."

"This is how I recharge!"

"What about me?" Chara was indignant, maybe even offended, but Frisk ignored them.

"What about you? You've already had your way about everything else today!"

"What?" Now they sounded outraged. "How have I had my way about a SINGLE thing today? You make EVERY decision."

"As if," Frisk shot back."You make me roll out of bed, you make me rush through breakfast, you treat me like an idiot while I'm trying to work, and now you won't let me hang out with my friends!"

There was something different about Chara's tone all of a sudden; something new flashing through their emotions. It wasn't just anger, but whatever it was, Frisk had been having too bad of a day to think about it.

"But—it's not a matter of 'letting' you do anything," Chara protested. They sounded strange. Upset, even. "You are in charge. All I can do—literally ALL I can do is try to help you. I thought that's what you wanted. I thought you-"

"It's NOT what I want!" Frisk surprised even themself with the anger in their tone. It wasn't spoken out loud, but it was vivid enough in their mind that they were mouthing the words with their fists curled up in anger. "I want to do my work without a voice in my head calling me stupid! I want to have a normal life without a voice telling me they need to 'recharge' first! I want to live MY life like I want to live it without having to fucking ask for permission!"

Chara's emotions were going haywire. They'd never felt this from them before. They'd argued before, obviously, and they expected another internal shouting match. To their surprise—and to their anger, because they really wanted to keep venting—Chara's voice was shaking.

"B-But... I was just... I thought we were here as partners..."

"We're NOT partners! This is my life, Chara! You threw yours away!"

Saying that felt like ripping off a scab. It hurt, and they knew they shouldn't have said it, but in the moment, just for that moment, they didn't care.

They were breathing heavily now. Somewhere deep down they knew that this wasn't really what was bothering them. Their nightmare had started them off high strung today. School had just tightened their nerves, and Chara's commentary, usually a comfort even when they were bickering, had just been the straw that broke the camel's back. That was probably why there wasn't any satisfaction in what they said. They just felt tired, and frustrated, and just wanted to crawl back into bed and cry now.

They waited for a response. For Chara to yell back. For anger. Fury. Instead there was only silence and reeling sensation from deep in their mind. The deafening silence made Chara's emotions almost as loud and obvious as Frisk's own.

Chara was shocked. Chara was hurt. Chara felt as though the environment had just crumbled away around them. It was such a strong feeling it was disorienting. The world almost seemed to be spinning, and Frisk wasn't sure if it was their own feeling or if they'd hit Chara so hard the emotions had overflowed.

It didn't go away, either. Frisk's anger was already evaporating, like it usually did when they started to vent, but the shock in Chara didn't grow any less strong. The hurt only seemed to cut deeper as Frisk's words sank in.

Anger started to give way to worry. They'd very rarely felt anything like this from Chara before. It was like punching a brick wall in anger, expecting to hurt your hand but instead feeling the wall crumble to dust at your touch.

The imagery brought disturbing memories to mind.

"Chara, I-"

"Alright."

The other human's tone was quiet. The ghost of a whisper in the very back of their conscience, sounding stiff and lifeless.

"...'alright,' what?"

"I said alright," Chara repeated quietly. "Do what you want. I won't bother you. I... I made my choice a long time ago."

"Wait. I didn't mean it like that!" Guilt and panic were starting to well up in Frisk's chest. "Chara! C'mon, you know I get mad sometimes. We're just having a fight. Don't sulk all day 'cause of it!"

Silence. Chara refused to speak, becoming nothing but a sort of cold, hurt anger in the back of Frisk's head. They seemed to even be trying to cut off their emotions from Frisk, though that was impossible.

"I just lashed out without thinking. Y'know, like with Snowdrake, or—come ON, talk to me!"

Still silence.

"Chara!"

Silence.

"Please—get mad! Say something! Snap back! I don't care, just talk to me!"

". . ."

But nobody answered.