Chances are there was at least one person at work you dreaded running into this morning. It’s the person who you knew was going to be all gloom and doom about the Cubs because they split the first series of the year against the big league facsimile that is the Miami Marlins. You knew that he or she was going to come armed with at least one, if not all of these really insightful bon mots:



“See what happens when you put together a $200 million team without a leadoff hitter?”



“Schwarber’s not an outfielder, the Cubs should play Almora instead of their ‘crush.’” – OK, that one only applies if you work with Joe Sheehan.



“Who told Yu Darvish it was a World Series game?” Yes, I may have tweeted that very thing on Saturday, but I was just being funny, honest.



“Nice closer, huh? He can throw two pitches every four days, I guess.”



“Joe always has Javy bunt with a...