Happier days: Islamabad United celebrate their win in the Pakistan Super League. Well, after a gutsy first-up win against Peshawar Zalmi, Islamabad United were given the worst punch in the mouth. Only 12 hours after our great win I was urgently called in to speak to our director of cricket, cricketing icon Wasim Akram, and our owner, Ali Naqvi. They told me that two of our most senior players – Sharjeel Khan and Khalid Latif – were provisionally suspended for alleged involvement in corruption. I felt like I was about to vomit. Wasim and I were almost in tears. We had invested so much time to get these two boys into form and playing for Pakistan. Then our beloved captain Misbah-ul-Haq arrived and he was given the news. Misbah's immediate response is one I will never forget. He just froze. His face and body looked like the life had been drained out of it. He could barely breathe, let alone speak. We don't know the full facts of the matter concerning Sharjeel and Khalid and no doubt it will come out in time. We weren't told anything about what had transpired from the Pakistan Cricket Board or the anti-corruption unit of the International Cricket Council. Just that both players had been provisionally suspended for breaches of code of behaviour. I could sense something coming during the end of our first match versus Peshawar. Brad Haddin just made a brilliant knock of 73 and the World Anti-Doping Agency burst into the rooms and targeted Haddin and two other boys for drug testing while the match was in progress. We won the match, then four guys in suits looking like police detectives came into our dressing room and escorted Sharjeel, Khalid and Irfan to interview rooms. Their bags and phones were also confiscated.

Our players were oblivious to it as many were still outside celebrating our great win. We have a huge squad of 19 players and nine staff and even while we were travelling back to the hotel from the ground, no one asked Wasim or me about the whereabouts of three senior players. Wasim and I couldn't sleep a wink when we got to our hotel at 3am. I still have no idea what the boys are supposed to have done. Our staff has put so much time and effort into these boys. They have been lectured by our staff and the anti-corruption unit on the fact that if they are approached by anyone they must notify the anti-corruption unt. They also have been lectured by our staff, PCB and WADA on what they can and cannot take. At 6pm the next day, we had an emergency meeting. The owner and I had to tell the team that Sharjeel and Khalid had been provisionally suspended and Mohammad Irfan was being questioned. The team was in utter disbelief. You could hear a pin drop as they sat with heads bowed in disappointment. We wanted the team to speak, to just say how they were feeling, from senior players to the junior boys. It felt like our two best mates had died and we had no idea what was going on with poor old Irfan. What's more, we had a game to play the next day. I got no sleep again, but the sun came up and I knew I had to prepare these boys for a big match against Lahore. Win this and we were only one win away from qualifying for the finals.

At 4pm, I held a team meeting and I wanted to talk about how we were going to deal with the sadness within the group. Wasim spoke with so much passion. He talked about the tragic passing of his wife seven years ago and how he tried to cope with the pain. Wasim spoke of his shock and how he told his two boys that their mother had just died. He thought he could just lay there and hope the sadness would pass. He knew he had to move on but how? It was a gut-wrenching, emotional talk for seven minutes to players he loves. We went through the game plan, but I knew we were not ready. Just before the meeting ended, we got the tremendous news that Irfan was cleared and was allowed to play. But how could I play him after what he had just gone through? So I rested him. We were all over the place physically and emotionally and the match reflected it. We got punched up again. We needed to get the team out of our hotel and go to our owners' hotel and enjoy each other's company again. Talk again. Laugh at each others' jokes again. This is a time I want our senior guys such as Misbah, Haddin, Shane Watson, Sam Badree and Dwayne Smith to guide our team through these murky waters.

We are the mates of these players and we will stand next to them and help them through this awful time. But I applaud the PCB and the ICC on how they have handled this matter. It acted swiftly and with authority. As a coach and as a team, we have been delivered terrible news. Since last week, I have also been attacked by former Pakistani players claiming that I had, in the past, been found guilty of association with a bookmaker, which was completely false. But we will cope, because we have to. We are a proud team who will upheld the great traditions of the game we love. Every sport has to deal with this cancer of corruption. We all must remain vigilant to maintain the integrity of the sport. While many coaches and staff try to keep our game clean, I find it hard to swallow that many cricket boards around the world have got commercial partnerships with online betting companies and it's advertised all over the ground. The hypocrisy of it all! And we are the ones who have to pick up the pieces.

