Remember that video of thousands of screaming teenage girls converging on Macy’s in Manhattan for a Justin Bieber appearance we posted back in June? Well, yesterday our Uproxx cousins at Warming Glow posted a similarly insane Mexican news report (it’s embedded below) showing hundreds of teenage Mexican girls just absolutely losing their minds over not being able to get tickets to a sold out Justin Bieber concert. While both of those videos are beyond ridiculous, they both pale in comparison to the ridiculousness of this: As a commenter in the Warming Glow thread noted, some of the Mexican teenage girls who weren’t able to get tickets for the show are now auctioning off their virginity on Facebook in exchange for tickets.

Yes, commenter Hiriart posted a link to a Sipse report on this horrific and utterly mind-blowing occurrence. The report’s in Spanish, and despite taking three semesters of Spanish classes in college I’m quite bad at Spanish, so I put the whole story through Google Translate.

Now, if you’ve ever entered something into Google Translate previously you know that what it spits out can often be jibberish-y, due to nuances in the language and things getting lost in translation and such. And that’s sort of the case here — but because the translated version was quite amusing, I copied and pasted it as is below, just to add another layer of absurdity to all of this.

The black market of the Internet to get tickets for the concert of Justin Bieber on the Internet has reached the point of offering the first sex in exchange for a concert ticket, as published by the portal sdpnoticias.com Real scenes of hysteria were posted on YouTube by girls who could not get a ticket. Now things have gone to another level. According to that reported by the newspaper El Norte, a girl has even offered its first time in exchange for a ticket to see the Canadian artist. “My virginity for a ticket to Justin Bieber, urgeee me,” wrote a user’s social network Facebook. In addition, some “vivales” have used to seek to change tickets in exchange for the company of a girl, the same newspaper reported.

“My virginity for a ticket to Justin Bieber, urgeee me!”

No, there’s no way anyone will ever have regrets about any of this.