Mrs May defines Brexit by border control, so she’d have to go. The Norway plan would need the support of dozens of Labour MPs, so a new-elected Tory leader couldn’t embark on such collusion. An unelected caretaker would be enstooled: perhaps David Lidington, her de facto deputy. But for this plan to work, every Conservative MP would have to agree. If even one objects, and runs for the premier, a full leadership contest is triggered.

One former Cabinet member envisages the contest being condensed into political speed-dating, with MPs being asked to hold votes every three hours until they reach two candidates. The next day, hustings would be held in both Plymouth and Bristol, with two a day until they reach Inverness – so that the whole process is wrapped up in 10 days (Christmas post permitting). Then the new leader immediately pursues a no-deal Brexit while saying Brussels can always make a better offer.

And what might Conservative Party members want? Someone who can make Brexit look deliberate, who can project the sense of optimism that drove the referendum vote, who sees an opportunity rather than a crisis to be mitigated. Someone who, above all, has the ability to articulate – to the country and the world – the kind of open, globally-minded Brexit that we will pursue. Someone capable of the sort of sentiments that are expressed with such cheerful effervescence in this very column every Monday.