october 1 1996 - november 10 1996

October 1 1996

Oscar ran out and went missing for two days and I was so scared that the big man would get him but he came back all dirty but ok. I think Mommy is taking a break from daddys because no one has come over in a while. Mommy is sad again and still talks a lot to the mystery person on the phone. The big man was at the window today by the tree and I played a trick on Mommy. I said what kind of bird is that and pointed to him. She said she didn’t see any bird. Mommy doesn’t take any pills and she is ok. I’m going to stop taking my pills.



November 10 1996

Mommy surprised me this morning saying that after school tomorrow she’s taking me to the book club! I’m so excited! I thought we would go on a friday like she usually does but this is neat too! I’m going to bring some of my favorite books The Hardy Boys Tower Treasure and Where the Wild Things Are to show them. I’m going to try to make some friends there if there are other kids who read a lot like I do. I don’t think they would make fun of me like the kids at school who call me names. I can’t wait till tomorrow!

november 11 1996

November 11 1996*

Mommy took me to her book club after school. There were no books though. It was a camp fire. There was a bunch of people in big black hoods and they had masks that were white. I think they were wizards. We listened to a man talk about their master and then we drank something like at church. It was gross but Mommy said it was ok so I drank it. I fell asleep and woke up in this dark house with candles. I was wearing a robe and my tummy hurt and my arm had a bandage on it and it was really sore. They made me say weird things and plege allegance like to the flag at school. There was a man with a skeleton face like from my dream. I saw a drawing of the big man on the wall. I pointed and the wizard people started whispering at each other. A man came over to me and said you will be one of us now. I asked what books they read and they gave me this black book with no title that was confusing. They sung a prayer from it in words I didn’t understand and then we went home. Mommy was crying. She said she was so proud of me. I think they drank my blood. Is this what a book club is? I don’t think I like book clubs.

*this happened on my 5th birthday. there is some deep significance to this date that i have yet to figure out. it seems to be connected to everything.