Conversation Victor and I had in the car:

Me: Oh my God, did you see the name of that cemetery? “Resurrection Cemetery”. What a terrible name for a cemetery.

Victor: It’s because they believe in the resurrection of believers, dumbass.

Me: Still. Some things just shouldn’t be resurrected. Just what we need is a bunch of damn zombies wandering the earth.

Victor: Yeah, that’s not “resurrection”. That’s “reanimation”.

Me: Same difference. Although I guess “Reanimation Cemetery” would be slightly more disturbing.

Victor: It’s not the same difference. Zombies are reanimated, but they don’t have their previous mental capacity so it’s not a resurrection. Technically it’s “zombification”.

Me: Well if you want to get all technical, then how about vampires?

Victor: Um…they’re fine?

Me: No. I mean, vampires have their “previous mental capacity”, thus by your logic they are resurrected. They might as well name it “Jesus-Is-Bringing-Back-Vampires Cemetery”.

Victor: It’s not the same thing because when you resurrect someone from the grave they aren’t undead.

Me: No, they are TOTALLY undead. That’s like the very definition of the undead.

Victor: No. A vampire is undead. The resurrected aren’t undead.

Me: I think you don’t know what “undead” means.

Victor: I THINK YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT UNDEAD MEANS!

Me: God, calm down, Darwin. Don’t get all crazy just ’cause I threw a vampire monkey-wrench in your faulty zombie logic.

Victor: *sigh* Look, there are all sorts of exceptions you aren’t considering. You can reanimate someone without making them a “zombie”. For example, you can just bring them back simply to perform a task.

Me. Yeah. And that’s called a zombie.

Victor: No, because they wouldn’t crave brains. They’d just have a job to do. Look it up.

Me: Oh I will look it up. I’ll look it up in “The Dictionary Of Shit That Doesn’t Exist”.

Victor: *glower*

Me: I wonder if this is the weirdest fight we’ve ever had.

Victor: Not even close.

Comment of the day: A quick google seach on resurrection and reanimation turned up that “There is a difference between resurrection and resuscitation, or re-animation. Resurrection refers to putting on a new, glorified body, while re-animation, or resuscitation, mean raising the person in the old, mortal body in which they died.” (ref) So zombies are re-animated, vampires are undead, and Jesus and Meredith Grey were resurrected. As for the comment I saw about zombies being made up – the brain-eating in films was made up, but they’re based on voodoo, just like in other films such as Weekend at Bernie’s. ~ Cyniclite

Updated to add: I just realized Meredith Grey never got a glorified body, so she was just resuscitated. I should have said Jesus and Robocop were resurrected. ~Cyniclite