OK, do I have you attention now?

I am sure some of our readers quickly caught the pun in the title of this article. Others may be confused. Hint: It is not a hashtag related to mobilizing rapey-beaty guys to forcibly penetrate feminist clams on Twatter with anti-feminist, rapey-beaty twatty-tweets. No, no, no, I would not do such a thing, even if I had enthusiastic consent. And no David, it is not an endorsement of rape or “rape culture,” though we both know that won’t stop you from lying to your readers about it – all three of them if we count the ones who can read.

Pardon my ableist digression. I’ll continue that at #rapetard.

What the title is mocking is the twending on Twatter of the hashtag #killallmen by a bunch of feminist twits who wanted to twat out their objections to patriarchy, capitalism, mud wrestling, page 3 girls and any other area where your average feminist can’t compete.

It does deserve to be mocked, which means that I don’t take it very seriously. Clarification. Do I think that some of these women want men dead? Oh sure. But I also think that their figuring out how to use a hashtag to say it was at the upper limits their abilities. I am betting most of them needed help from men to learn how to use a laptop or smart phone to begin with.

Taking that skill and saying something stupid with it is as far as most of them will ever get.

What is really entertaining here is the reaction from some feminists who are expressing their distaste for their sister twatter twins as proof they are fair and balanced. I don’t believe it with Fox News and I don’t believe it with them, either.

Our best example comes from Mary Elizabeth Williams over at Salon.com, who gives us the most Tweedledee-fucking-dumb analysis of the matter available on the net.

First, after the title to her piece advised us that tweeting about killing half the human race was “unfunny,” her subtitle immediately took us to the wrong side of common sense:

“A satire turns into a serious conversation — but mostly it’s an excuse for both sexes to be obnoxious”

I love it. She is figuring out how to include men in the blame for this shit before the reader can even get to the first paragraph of her article. She figures this is both sexes being obnoxious? No, but she needed to in order to maintain some semblance of allegiance to the narrative that informs us that women are never solely accountable for what they think, say or do. Somewhere, even if you have to fabricate it, there is a man to blame. And Williams wastes no time in fabricating.

She is quick to point to the similar behavior in men who twatted out not so nice things about women. That is, after she went digging for it to find an example.

Let’s take a look at this from the stats. Here is an image of the brief, slightly vigorous trending of #killallmen.

OK, so between 35 and 40 tweets an hour can’t exactly compete with #Reddit, but it was still enough to capture the attention of Salon and other feminist blogs. In fact, it was their attention to it, not the hashtag itself that led to the article you are reading.

Now, let’s take a look the same “trending” for one of the examples she cited as making this a sexually symmetric affair. In this case, #agoodwoman.

That is actually the trending for the same period as #killallmen. It only looks like Futrelle’s EEG.

I would show you the rest of the results for Williams’ examples, but I will save the trouble and the bandwidth and just ask you to imagine the same straight line a few more times.

It is no wonder that Williams’s examples are so lame. She had to go back to a two and a half year old blog post to find them. Checking into the hashtag myself, I found a couple, actually one, really unsavory tweet on the first page of returns. It was was the distasteful utterance of #agoodwoman “lays down and takes it. LMFAO.” Dumb and insulting for sure, though in my rapey-beaty mind it somehow does not rise to the level of killing everyone who isn’t female. Call me cwazy.

Mostly the thread I read was replete with expressions like #agoodwoman “stays when the money goes,” and “knows how to give a man space,” and “is priceless.” Should I have issued a trigger warning?

So, to summarize, a bunch of stupid asshat feminists on Twatter started a short term trend of vomiting out their hatred in such a blatant way that even slightly less stupid (perhaps) feminist asshats like Mary Elizabeth Williams knew they had to make some sort of at least feeble objection. She did so, making sure she watered down her admonishments sufficiently with a completely concocted frame job on men which she extracted pretty much out of thin air – or pulled out of her twatter if you prefer.

And she then imagines she has put icing on her cake of straw by pointing to what can only be described as a sane and rational response to this kind of blind hatred, as though it supports the idea that men have responded in kind to the hate:

It is reminiscent of Williams’ last episode of fucktardery, where she actually listed the ways that feminists have undermined the amelioration of men’s issues as proof that they hadn’t.

I really do wish this is where it ended. I wish we could just close with how Williams is asserting how wrong all this hashtag business is, even while she acts like she is the only one allowed to complain about it.

However, Williams closes her article with an attempt to be poignant. She might even sound erudite and wise if you are completely clueless:

Yeah, it’s just a hashtag. But what happens when you reduce human communication to a microscopic number of characters is that you’re not just going to oversimplify the bejesus out everything. You’re also going to get a sometimes chillingly boiled down view into the human heart and mind. And in a world of institutionalized violence, casual sexism and daily micro-aggressions, creating a better, kinder world doesn’t start with empowering women to be jerks.

Jerry Springer could not have said it any better, even if he were choking back forced tears and faking nobility after hosting and hour of trailer trash taking swings at each other for a howling audience of losers.

No, Mary Elizabeth, it isn’t just about hashtags. If you have any interest at all in not empowering women to be jerks, then maybe you should start by not empowering them to be evil.

Instead of writing about a crew of nutcases that can barely handle a Twitter account without saying something stupid, why don’t you write about Pamela O’Shaughnessy, the Ivy League educated attorney and Simon and Shuster novelist that blogs about reengineering men like they were “corn.”

Why don’t you write about Danielle Pynnonen, a child care worker who refers to the six year old boys in her care as “Mr. Rape Threat” and promises that if she had her way there would be hell for those boys to pay?

Why don’t you write about Kat Pinder, a community development coordinator for the City of Perth in Australia and former U.K. Game show Big Brother contestant who writes that we need a national day for men to stay at home and be raped and beaten?

Why don’t you write about Isabelle Moreira, a web developer in Curitiba, Brazil, who after wondering aloud if anyone really thinks hating men is a “bad thing,” is reassured by one of her sisters with the words, “I am one of those bad, shameful feminists, who wish we just kill the fuckers (whether it’s a practical tack to take or not).”?

Why don’t you write about Mary Syrett, aka Mary Sunshine, a writer and member of the City of Kingston Arts Council in Ontario, Canada, who opines, well, shit, lemme just show you:

Is that fucking “unfunny” enough for you to write about it?

Why don’t you write about Julie LeComte, a communications assistant for the French-Australian Chamber of Commerce and Industry in Australia who wants, “violent social, political and military revolution,” on a global scale, with the aim of exterminating men?

Why don’t you try to answer even one of these fucking questions, Mary Elizabeth? You see, while you try to make your little splash at Salon, trying to show the world you’re all Fox News fair and balanced and shit; that you will even rile the sistahs when decency is on the line, the real and true evil that festers in the underbelly of your ideology is alive and well and neglected – especially by people like you. You are doing it now, even as you put on the pretense of someone with a moral compass.

Please, spare us the false indignation over a handful of morons. Quit stepping up on their silly backs so you can act like you have had an attack of human dignity. You are not fooling anyone.

If you want a “better, kinder world,” quit enabling those who are trying to create the exact opposite of that.

Quit trashing that world up with your lies.

Quit being one of them.