brennacedria:

enemaofthestate: i never understood why some non religious people get offended or roll their eyes when the religious say they’ll pray for them or something like man i get stoked because i might not believe in their god but they do and to them it’s one of the kindest things you can do for someone so why shit all over it just be grateful that they’re doing something nice for you Except at the same time, some people have bad history with religion, so even if they understand how the sentiment is intended, it can make them uncomfortable.

“I’ll keep you in my prayers” or “I’m praying for you” is one of my biggest social pet peeves, and for me, it’s because prayer is often offered in place of something that would be genuinely useful. Oddly enough, it’s often used as a way to absolve yourself of your social responsibility to your fellow person. When you offer to pray for someone, the message you’re sending, “I don’t need to actually get off my butt and help those homeless people; or that person whose house burned down; or that child who just lost their parent, or whoever I come across that might be in pain or in need, because I’m praying for them and, gosh, isn’t that just so kind of me? Don’t I deserve a cookie for being so thoughtful?”

No, you don’t deserve a cookie. You’re being lazy, and you’re twisting their tragedy or hardships to make it all about how kind you are. The truly kind thing to do would be to roll up your sleeves and help them out, however they need. And if you don’t know how or what they need? Then you ask.

And if you want to pray for someone, then go ahead and just do it; don’t bother telling the other person with the implication that they should thank you for how thoughtful you’re being. I mean, isn’t prayer supposed to be kept between you and God anyway? So why is it absolutely necessary to you that you inform someone when you’re praying for them?

And the next time you find yourself in a situation where your instinct is to say to someone, “I’ll pray for you”, instead replace it with, “What can I do to help you out?” I’m pretty sure that for the person who needs help, it’ll mean much, much more.

(via brennacedria)