Man the trade deadline shenanigans gave us about two months worth of material in the span of about 2 days. Maybe I’ll get to all of it, I don’t know. Since this was the first genuine bombshell to drop, lets just start with that. Jimmy Garoppolo is now the starting QB for the 49ers.

The 49ers got him for a second and Brian Hoyer. They technically didn’t get Hoyer in the trade, but the 49ers immediately dropped him and then Hoyer signed up with the Pats the instant he made it through waivers. I wouldn’t be surprised if that was something negotiated in the deal in some way, maybe a way to get Hoyer for cheaper? Who knows. We finally get to see what ol’ Janeane Garafolo can do. On a real team, not the pristine organization of New England. He’s in the muck now with the rest of us. He shall swim, or he shall die.

I’m glad he’s out of Brady’s shadow, dude is the handsomest man in football. He deserves the limelight before some Seahawk bludgeons him to death and gives him CTE. I think this makes the 49ers instant contenders for “winning a few games”. He can’t be much worse than Hoyer, but I think the spark can get a few wins out of them. They do still have to play the Cardinals and the Giants.

It doesn’t mean much for the Pats, though it feels like they sort of wasted their opportunity with him last year. They probably could have sold him for more. A 2nd is probably decent enough, considering that’s where he was drafted and is essentially untouched still in the box pristine.

Other highlights of the trade deadline!

The Dolphins go full tank and basically give up Jay Ajayi for nothing, Eagles going all in

The Bills traded Sammy Watkins earlier but just replaced him with Fat Sammy Watkins

The Seahawks grabbed someone who actually knows how to play O-line

The Browns managed to find some dignity they hadn’t yet ruined and then ruined it

The Broncos traded Trevor for Brock

Good stuff!

Special thanks to Jack Yaudes for the inspirational idea for this comic