One Block team pulled off a Steven Bradbury this week with a surprise, come-from-behind victory in a week in which few teams finished.

But not sharing that winning feeling, during an arduous dining room and hallway reno, are most of the tradies on site.

Men with tool belts are usually enamoured by Gold Coast mums Suzi and Vonni.

However, not this time, with the deadline for judging looming and deep fatigue setting in.

Suzi and Vonni have left their apartment in disarray and a team of tradesman are waiting for them to clean the mess. Nobody, especially not this carpet guy, is falling for their charms.

In Whitney and Andrew’s apartment, a plasterer is peeved at their bone idle lack of support.

“I’ve tried to teach them; Andrew can’t even hang a sheet, you know what I mean? I’m over it. I don’t want to work back here anymore,” he whines.

Tradies are mentally swiping left for the Tinderlings.

Caro and Kingi have no such tensions bubbling.

They are relaxed, organised and in the money, and have splashed out on a $4000 pot decorated with barnacles.

And they make sure Whitney hears just how much they have spent.

But Whitney needn’t mind. It’s more likely to have come from Davy Jones’ Locker than David Jones and judge Neale Whitaker’s going to hate it, for sure.

Suzi and Voni’s pendant lamp over their dining room table hangs too low, impeding the view.

“Maybe you’ll be able to see through that glass?” Suzi asks, hopefully.

“Of course you’ll be able to see through it – it’s clear,” Vonni says. (#Blockphysics)

Tools down!

Judges Shaynna Blaze, Darren Palmer and Neale arrive to unleash fury.

Caro and Kingi are first and their map feature walls, wrapping the lift well, find their way into the judges’ hearts.

But Darren fears the LED light strip looks “too nightclubby” and Shaynna is horrified by the “Atlantis” barnacle pot.

Neale dislikes the urn with sticks poking out. It’s all a bit poxy.

Ugh, next!

Andrew and Whitney find the task of selecting throw rugs, ambient lighting and paint colours too much to handle.

Tears on his pillow.

But they are doing something right, because their foyer brings out Shaynna’s Decor Goldilocks.

“It’s not too gloss, not too matte – it’s just right.”

The Tinderlings chose a coffin-shaped table (which is in lovely synergy with the hotel’s past – it is linked to the infamous vampire gigolo slaying) and it’s weirdly a hit with the judges.



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Suzi and Vonni are desperate for a win, with a depleted budget.

Lord, hear our prayer #Blocktagon #BlocktaGod

“Who does marble skirting? Like, what is that?” Shaynna is unimpressed by the Goldie girls’ attempt at luxe.

But they’ve only ever had their local Jupiters Casino for inspiration, so surely all must be forgiven. They know not what they do.

Worse is the fact they haven’t finished.

“I don’t think this apartment knows what it is anymore,” Neale laments.

Neale has a strange habit of talking about inanimate things through a humanising prism of traits and complexity.

Luke and Ebony are next in the firing line and the judges are greeted by gyprock green walls.

Everything else they have achieved this week is spot on and Shaynna declares they would have been the team to beat had they have gotten their bums into gear and finished.

Dean and Shay in the penthouse had a more taxing week than any.

In a bid to finish, Dean pushed his tradesmen so hard that they needed to hug it out.

Sparkies share some sugar.

Again, the judges are confronted by green gyprock and bare walls (the teams should unite and call it a “mirco-trend” – in style for this week only).

Shay’s Disney princess styling has Shaynna in a tizz. Cakes dripping in icing, floral wreaths and flickering candles create a sickly sweet scene.

“Sexy”, “now”, “glamour”, “theatrical”. Somebody get Shaynna a Bex and send her to the master suite for a lay down.

But the room isn’t finished and when Shaynna’s rush subsides, she concedes that no matter how many meringues you put out, it won’t win a room.

#putoutyourmeringues

The scores are in and given they were one of only two teams to finish this week, the Tinderlings Whitney and Andrew have it in the bag, but by half a point.

Kingi and Caro sneak in second, followed by Dean and Shay, then Luke and Ebony, followed by luckless Suzi and Vonni.

The teams next tackle terraces and are allowed to re-do one disaster room.