Some glorious self-owns are almost too beautiful for this world. At a rally in New Hampshire Thursday night, Donald Trump had two. First, the president of the United States, who is definitionally obese, mocked what he thought was a protester for being overweight. “That guy’s got a serious weight problem,” the leader of the free world told the crowd. “Go home,” he instructed he man. “Start exercising.”

Yes, Trump, who reportedly “considers exercise misguided, arguing that a person, like a battery, is born with a finite amount of energy.” Yes, Trump, who subsists on fast food and wouldn’t eat a vegetable if it was deep-fried in Big Macs. Yes, Trump, who could share clothes with Jabba the Hutt, made fun of someone else for being overweight, because that person happened to disagree with his policies. Except, oops! It turns out the man the president publicly mocked for being fat...wasn’t a Trump protester at all:

Luckily for the president, his supporters believe he can do no wrong, including calling them morbidly obese in front of thousands of people and on live TV.

Stay tuned for next week when Trump publicly insults a woman’s looks except, wait, that’s already happened numerous times before.

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