My mom used to talk to me about differed gratification. I hated the talk and I hated the idea. The basic idea was that we must be patient, wait, and put in the work, effort, and time for good things to happen. Things don’t just happen for us quickly and magically! They aren’t supposed to. They happen when we deserve for them to happen and when we have done the work to make them happen. Like most kids, I preferred the idea of immediate gratification. I wanted what I wanted, and I wanted it now!

In these times, differed gratification is a foreign idea. We are blessed (and maybe a little cursed) to live in a time where instant gratification is prevalent in our ever-day lives! We want to know something? Google it. We can immediately research it endlessly on the internet. We want to buy something? We don’t have to go to 10 stores to find it. Anything we want is a few key strokes away, and is rushed to our front doors.

Things like personal growth, education, successful relationships, social skills, a great marriage, and spirituality, are all things that are easily overlooked and no longer focused on, because of the ultra-busy, distracted lifestyle we tend to be caught up in, but these things are so important for us to focus and concentrate on. These are the things that take patience and work. They are life-long accomplishments. The important things that matter the most are often the most difficult things to come by. They require patience, waiting, consistency, time, and energy. We have to learn to practice differed gratification with these things, as much as we would rather not.

Are we becoming fragile and weak with all of the instant gratification and abundance that we enjoy daily, or is it making us stronger, more able, and more capable? When we have to wait for something good, are we perceiving that we are instantly moving from an abundant lifestyle to one of lack? Many families all around the world are living on only one dollar a day. In 2018, the rate at which children were starving to death was one, every 17 seconds. There are children, 13 and 14 years of age, committing suicide because they perceive that they are living an existence, riddled with problems, and living a life of lack, not getting what they want, when they haven’t yet even begun to live, let alone learn that hard work accompanies many accomplishments and successes. It is devastatingly heartbreaking to see others this young feeling so hopeless, alone, and lost. Something needs to change, and I think it begins with mindset. Our beliefs, perceptions, and personal philosophies MATTER.

Often the things which are most precious to us are most precious because they were the most difficult things to come by. In a time where instant gratification is the norm, we can decide to practice differed gratification and do the work needed to acquire the things that will truly make a difference in our lives, and in the lives of those around us.

Today I will decide which things are most important to me. I will re-commit to working long and hard to prove to myself just how much these things truly matter in my life. I will remember that many of my endeavors were meant to be life-long. I will continue to be patient and remember to enjoy the process each day, all along the way.

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Remember: Mindset matters. Character counts. What we choose to focus is everything!