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ST. JOHN'S, N.L. —

Try to have patience with angry Albertans. They hear the name “Trudeau” and they get hysterical, and all sense of proportion and rationality dissipates out their smoking ears.

They have good grounds for their madness, but when the emotion moves from mind to mouth — or keyboard — what comes out is often a garbled mania of inconsistencies and contradictions.

Angry Albertans are like a long-distance runner who lacks direction, with plenty of speed and stamina, but an inability to stay on the track.

To understand angry Albertans, you have to go back to the beginning, i.e., four decades ago, to Prime Minister Trudeau the First. Back then, the Liberal government in Ottawa kept the price of Alberta oil artificially low, via the national energy program, for the benefit of Ontario industry. That is why, to this day, Liberals in the wild rose province are as rare as saddled llamas. If you want to pick a fight on the streets of Calgary, just utter, “Trudeau.”

This partially explains the vicious vituperation some angry Albertans spewed at Newfoundlanders via social media after the federal election.

If Newfoundlanders have saltwater in their veins, Albertans have oil, and they can’t comprehend how their fellow oil-producing Canadians could support a Trudeau, who has vowed to shut down the Canadian oil industry by 2050.

Newfoundlanders understandably want to imbibe the benefits of offshore oil, just as angry Albertans want to bring in billions from the oilsands. Voting for someone who wants to cap those wells of wealth, and returning six of seven Liberal MPs to Ottawa, was unfathomable and foolish from the viewpoint of angry Albertans.

Viewed from the West, Newfoundlanders’ vote was a betrayal of their oilpatch pals, who are supposed to support each other against Ottawa and wear their hardhats and conservatism with pride. Or rather, wear them with anger. Pride sounds too much like, well, you know.

Trudeau II bought a pipeline for the petrol province and promised to complete it, but that didn’t satisfy the petrol province. Angry Albertans are once again talking about quitting Confederation.

Of course, separation from Canada would mean an angry Albertan pipeline would have to traverse a foreign county, i.e., British Columbia, rather than a fellow Canadian province — an obvious dilemma many observers have already pointed out, but which seems to have escaped the notice of most angry Albertans.

Their anger is rife with inconsistencies. And yet, you can’t deny angry Albertans’ angry claim that Trudeau and his loathsome Liberals are hypocrites (see: SNC Lavalin, interference in prosecution of; see also: first-ever female indigenous cabinet minister, turfing of).

I stand corrected. Newfoundlanders (and Labradorians) in six of seven ridings can deny it. In this, they share irrationality with angry Albertans.

Allegiance is often misplaced. Just as Newfoundlanders’ alternating allegiance to Liberals-Tories-Liberals is self-destructive, so also is angry Albertans’ devotion to the Progressive Conservatives/Reform Party/Canadian Alliance/Conservatives.

Angry Albertans should be angry at the Conservative Party of Canada, not at Newfoundlanders.

Angry Albertans can’t figure out why two-thirds of Canadians avoid the Conservative Party of Canada like a rabid prairie dog.

The CPC may have garnered most of the popular vote nationally on Oct. 21 — getting 34 per cent — but it was rejected by 66 per cent of Canadians.

This should trigger a realization among angry Albertans: the Conservative party espouses a political philosophy that is narrow-minded, mean-spirited, outdated and discredited (see: trickle-down economics).

The Conservative party’s last two leaders, Stephen Harper and Andrew Scheer, lack any semblance of kindness or generosity — the two traits most required of a good human being, friend or leader.

And yet, angry Albertans can’t figure out why two-thirds of Canadians avoid the CPC like a rabid prairie dog.

Angry at Trudeau II because of the jobs he has cost them, angry Albertans elect a Conservative premier … who axes 2,000 government jobs and cuts corporate income taxes by one-third.

Being a born-and-raised Calgarian, I can’t help but empathize with angry Albertans. But they need to calm down, rein in their anger and try really, really, really hard to think rationally. They must purge the Conservative party of the socially conservative, right-wing wing-nuts who have taken over the party.

Then, most importantly, they need to revive and re-embrace the notion of the Red Tory. Hold a séance and summon the spirit of Peter Lougheed or something, and adopt a conservatism that is moderate and driven by practicality rather than by ideology.

Hopefully, angry Albertans can once again be friends with Newfoundlanders, even Liberal-voting ones.

Brian Jones is a desk editor at The Telegram. Angry Albertans can reach him at brian.jones@thetelegram.com.

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