This is why no one pays any attention to all those members of the liberal mafia returning their Sahitya Akademi awards. I don’t know who these so called “writers” and “intellectuals” think they are, but let me tell you that there is no Bajrang Dal activist going “maybe I should change my violent ways of seeking justice because they seem to upset Nayantara Sahgal?”

Instead, we mock them for their actions, because we recognise the impotence of their protest. We laugh at them because they’re taking intellectual masturbation to a knife fight. We laugh at them because we know that no matter how many writers return their awards, no matter how much midnight oil they burn trying to file their strongly worded op-eds before the deadline, they’re going to change nothing.

Isn’t that hilarious?

For the past year-and-a-half, the liberal mafia and its soldiers of sanctimony have spilled a lot of ink and pixels trying to convince the general public that there is something afoot in the corridors of power. That a terrifying, evil force has taken over the reigns of the country and is using every resource at its disposal to tear asunder the delicate thread holding our multi-cultural society together. And that the current spate of incidents are nothing but a short preview of the deviousness that lies in store.Last week their hoarse cries got some traction because of a couple of unrelated incidents that had nothing to do with each other whatsoever. Of course, the liberals would latch on to the incident in Dadri. It contains everything they hate: cow worshippers, religion, lynch mobs, murder, death of an innocent person, oppression of a minority, and police inaction. If someone from the victim’s family was part of an NGO, we’d have liberal bingo.However, what these doyens of disinformation refuse to acknowledge and discuss is that India has always been a haven for violence. We’re not just a country; we’re also the world’s largest fight club. Do you think hockey is our national sport because of our citizens’ overwhelming love for the game? Pfft! We gave it that honour because the hockey stick is the most popular non-lethal weapon used by people all over the country.Violence is simply how we solve our problems. It’s the Indian way! We live in a country where parents murdering their own children for disobeying them is considered an act of honour but children falling in love bring societal shame upon their family. In another country, these trigger-happy parents would at least be socially ostracised. In ours, they’re feted and held up as examples to emulate.Violence is how we deal with reality. If we don’t like it, we break it! Recently, taxi drivers in Mumbai got angry at all the new app-powered pickup services and decided to do something about it. When the taxi drivers in New York were faced with this problem, they banded together and came up with their own app to compete with the fancy Silicon Valley giants. In Mumbai, there were many reported incidents of drivers forcing passengers out of Uber cabs and harassing them, because HOW DARE THE PASSENGERS WANT A CHEAPER, BETTER ALTERNATIVE THAN A URINE-SOAKED NON-AC CAB MANNED BY A PERSON WHO LIKES TO RESOLVE DIFFERENCES BY PUNCHING OTHER PEOPLE IN THE FACE?You can’t raise millions of hotheaded man-children masquerading as adult men who think that they’re entitled to always get their way and then act surprised when they rough each other up. To be fair, it’s a great stress buster! Beating up members of a group that they deem as “the other” lets them forget about their own personal problems for a while. It’s quite therapeutic!So, when needlessly paranoid liberals complain about the sudden increase in “strong-arm tactics” or “intimidation,” they’re trying to connect the dots to solve a puzzle that doesn’t exist. Its as if they’ve suddenly woken up to the fact that mobs in this country go on a rampage. People in our country have been needlessly murdering each other for centuries! Let’s not pretend that it’s a new phenomenon.Take the incident in Dadri for example. It has nothing to do with all the anti-beef proclamations emanating from the ruling party for months leading up to it. There was no “environment of hostility” being created for those with specific dietary preferences, as the liberals claim. It was just an unfortunate incident caused by a huge, unavoidable misunderstanding.The media always deliberately misinterprets and misinforms the public about what BJP politicians say. Like when Mukhtar Abbas Naqvi asked beef eaters to go to Pakistan while giving a speech in Parliament, he was vilified as some sort of desi Uncle Tom who had betrayed his own people to win favour from the powers that be. But his remarks were misinterpreted. Naqvi didn’t intend them to be a rebuke. He was merely being helpful. His statement was as harmless as a Buzzfeed listicle. 21 Places In Pakistan Where They Serve Really Scrumptious Beef. He was encouraging tourism! Bringing people together. Isn’t that the sort of thing you secular freaks love?Likewise, when Sushil Kumar Modi asked the electorate of Bihar to choose between those who protect cows and those who slaughter them, he was just offering them a democratic choice. People have a right to choose whom they want to support. Whether they stand behind pious, god-fearing, dharmic leaders or those heathens who pander to religious extremists supporting the murder of a sacred animal, it’s up to them. The only person demonized here is Sushil Kumar Modi, for simply using his constitutional rights and expressing himself. Why do these self-proclaimed free speech ayatollahs want to censor opinions they don’t like?Another way the liberal media works is that it quotes someone out of context, trying to make him look like an idiot racist. Like when the freshly minted Chief Minister of Haryana said the other day that Muslims can stay in India if they give up beef. They focused on the wrong part. Instead of calling him out for using his bully pulpit for bigotry, they should be focused on the “Muslims can stay in the country” part. Wasn’t that nice of him? Doesn’t that show how tolerant he is? He’s giving Indian citizens who already live here renewed permission to live here like he’s some sort of benevolent landlord. Shouldn’t he be celebrated? But they won’t do that. They’ll just keep on berating him, making him another victim of India’s pseudo-secularism.What gets my goat is that some so called smart people expect Prime Minister Modi to make a strong statement about a non-coincidental, totally unrelated series of incidents. Haven’t these braniacs figured it out by now? As a fellow once said, the Prime Minister’s silences are strategic.He only takes on ridiculous straw man statements he can easily demolish. He doesn’t do arguments that actually exist.