Hello, this is Chris and welcome to MMA Squared.

Crack open a Budweiser, that’s right a Budweiser, because Modelo don’t pay me nothing and let’s talk action. This Saturday, Mike Perry stands poised to usurp Donald Cerrone as the UFC’s resident action fighter.

While Donald Cerrone’s anyone/anytime career has won him myriad bonuses and fans, his devil-may-care attitude feels choir boyish compared to Actual Florida Man. Bungee jumps and dirt bikes just can’t compete with burglary convictions and satellites to God.

Mike Perry’s approach to fighting is infectious. His personal brand has moved away from possible racist towards psycho motivational speaker, and there doesn’t seem to be an ironic bone in his body. If he emerges victorious in Colorado, his company stock options will be vested.

In other news, The Korean Zombie is back and we must savor this Bigfoot-level appearance. Both Yair Rodriguez and Mike Perry have more career octagon appearances than Chan Sung Jung. He’s won post-fight bonuses in four of his five appearances, let’s hope for a fifth.

Epilogue: Chris Weidman lobbied to get MMA legalized in New York State, but the only person concerned with his well being that night was Jacare. There should be a statue of this to show that the only people who can help fighters is other fighters. It’s the only way to get paid.

As always, MMA Squared is sponsored by COMBAT WOMBAT, an expression of marsupial violence known... somewhere. Follow me @RiniMMA or visit chrisrini.com for more artwork. Take care of yourself and I’ll talk to you next week.