96 SHARES Share Tweet

GREEN GLEN, FLORIDA — A group of concerned adults was seen chastising a group of teenagers of equal size this weekend, in a small Florida town. Eyewitness accounts are that the adults were seen wagging their fingers in the teenagers’ faces, while raising their voices. Some sources say that the adults became red in the face, and one person described them as “utterly apoplectic.”

“How dare you? What gives you the right,” a woman was overheard asking a younger woman. “This is blatant disrespect. You need to stop and think about what you are doing, because you are making us look really bad.”

The adults were alarmed and angry, reportedly, that the teens had been very successful in the last week demonstrating how easily obtained semiautomatic rifles, such as the AR-15 platform, in the United States. On Valentine’s Day this year, one of the deadliest school shootings in U.S. history took place at a high school not far from where the tense and angry debate between adults and teenagers was witnessed this weekend.

“If you kids don’t knock off all your protests, and if you don’t stop tweeting and retweeting common sense observations, you’re going to give a lot of people the impression we adults sat back and just pretended that there would be no downstream consequences to our utter apathy toward keeping guns safely out of the hands of violent criminals and the mentally ill,” a 45 year old man was heard shouting at his daughter. “Stop showing us up!”

In the last few days, several sponsors and corporate partners of the National Rifle Association have severed ties with the gun manufacturing lobbyist. The parents were seen haranguing their teenagers for participating in the #NeverAgain campaign and publicizing a boycott of the NRA.

“How dare you cause emotional turmoil for those massacre mongers? What gives you the right, just because you’re the ones being shot at,” a man was seen berating his daughter.

Another woman pleaded with a young man for him to stop using his social media accounts to bring awareness to the issue of school shootings.

“Don’t you understand we have to ignore gun violence because of the Second Amendment? We literally cannot and should not live our lives as if 240 years have passed since the Second Amendment was written, and if you were an adult, you’d know that,” the woman was heard saying.

Most of the adults admitted that they wanted to do something to stem the tide of gun violence at schools. However, all of them told the teenagers it wasn’t their “place” to bring attention to the subject. One man argued that “children are to be shot at and not heard.”

“It’s not that we like school shootings, we hate them, but there’s just nothing we can do it about right now, besides something, literally anything, and that’s hard,” a woman was seen telling her daughter. “If you guys don’t shut up soon, you’re going to expose to everyone how much we have failed to keep you safe, and you are gonna be SO grounded for that, young lady!”

Satire can also be found on The Political Garbage Chute and Alternative Facts.

More Satire: