In 2006 Donald Trump, a sentient pile of dirty sheets covered in poop, called former Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice a “bitch” in a speech at the Learning Annex in New York City. Today, Condoleezza Rice learned about these comments and responded perfectly.


First, here is Donald Trump’s reasoning on why Condoleezza Rice is a “bitch,” from CNN:

“Condoleezza Rice, she’s a lovely woman, but I think she’s a bitch. She goes around to other countries and other nations, negotiates with their leaders, comes back and nothing ever happens.”


Standard Trump. Tame Trump, even. This is clearly the same Trump that hates women with a fiery passion; it’s the same Trump that grabs pussies and brags about it to Billy Bush. CNN’s Kfiles learned of these recently re-surfaced comments today and when they emailed Condi for a statement, she replied “Exactly. Can’t wait until November 9!”



Trump’s issue with Rice is that she can’t “make a deal.” What I know about the intricacies of the role of secretary of state could fit inside a box of cigarettes, but I’m pretty sure that there’s a lot more to it than “making a deal” in the way Trump seems to be obsessed with. In a 2007 interview with CNN’s Wolf Blitzer, he clarified his unasked-for position on Condi’s deal-making skills.

“And Condoleezza Rice, who’s a lovely woman, but she never makes a deal,” Trump said. She doesn’t make deals. She waves. She gets off the plane. She waves. She sits down with some dictator, 45-degree angle. They do the camera shot. She waves again. Gets back on the plane. She waves. No deal ever happens.”

Wow, yes, thanks. Very clear now. A man with such a nuanced and complex understanding of this position should certainly be in charge.

“Can’t wait until November 9!” Condoleezza. Ma’am. You and me both.