I just began reading T.K.V. Desikachar’s The Heart of Yoga on establishing a personal practice. The concept of personalizing yoga practice to fit the needs of individuals was very prevalent in my training with Michelle Mazur and I try to promote it in my classes as well. I look forward to reading and learning about how I can help my students, but I am even more excited about learning how to help my own yoga practice—how to personalize my practice in such a way as to make maintaining it less of a battle with myself.

Before my yoga teacher training I struggled with maintaining a home yoga practice, and I continue to struggle now, years after my training, with keeping it consistent. I love yoga and it upsets me that I have to talk myself into doing something I love.

At home I don’t have the same stimulation or dedicated practice environment as in a yoga studio and there are four main struggles that hinder my home yoga practice:

Distractions

Living in a one-bedroom apartment, I do not have a dedicated yoga space closed off to the rest of my home. My practice area is in the middle of our living room, which has a couch, chair, and coffee table, and opens up to our dining area and kitchen. With these visuals triggering thoughts of everything else I could be doing in my home, it is difficult to focus on my practice and push myself within it.

After repeated sun salutations or a particularly vigorous flow toward the beginning of practice, the couch starts calling my name, or I start thinking about what else I could be doing.

Guilt

Yoga is an act of self-care. Although I know that self-care is vital to well-being, and better well-being leads to increased productivity, I often feel guilty taking time for myself that isn’t outwardly or immediately productive.

In the middle of practice I’ll feel guilty that I haven’t started dinner (or cleaned my dishes from last night), or I’ll think how I should be writing or planning or figuring out my life. When I’m at home, there are a million “more productive” things I could be doing, and I allow yoga to get pushed out of the way instead of always making it a top priority.

I’m Good at Excuses

Sometimes I’ll psych myself up to practice, unroll my mat, step on it, and then talk myself out of practicing for no legitimate reason.

Common internal dialogue:

—I’m too tired.

—No, you’re not, not really.

—I don’t want to think about a sequence.

—Just watch a video.

—But I don’t want to have to pick a video. What if I don’t like the instructor?

—Then do a different one.

—Ugh. Too much effort! I’m gonna watch Netflix instead.

For me, the hardest part of home practice is simply showing up and staying on my mat. When I’m at home it’s all too easy to say “I don’t want to today” or “I’ll do it later,” except that “later” practice never happens.

What I Think I “Should” Do Psychs Me Out

Similar to number 3, this struggle deals with the idea that I should do a longer practice. I should do an intense practice. I should include yin poses to get into my tight hips. I should abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz….

Thinking about all the false ideals of what I “should” do strikes fear into me. I become immobilized by it, ultimately deciding not to practice anything at all if I am not up for doing all that I think I should be doing.

At the end of my classes I always tell my students to give themselves gratitude for showing up on their mats and completing a practice because it’s possible to love yoga with your entire being yet fail to honor yourself with it. I am walking, breathing, practicing proof of this—but I’m working on it.