Following a Supreme Court non-decision effectively legalizing gay marriage in more than 50 percent of states, Stephen Colbert feels “like the last man on Earth who opposes man-man marriage,” the late-night host declared on Wednesday evening.

The Comedy Central character can’t even count on Republican leader John Boehner anymore, as the Speaker of the House is heading to California to raise money for openly gay GOP candidate Carl DeMaio. What is Colbert’s world coming to?

See video: Watch Japanese Animated Voice Synthesizer Hatsune Miku Perform on ‘The Late Show’

The future host of CBS’s “Late Show” now finds himself in the minority even among certain demographics of his own faux political party. The “Report” host expressed shock on Wednesday to learn that three in five young Republicans support gay marriage. Of course, the true nature of the surprise for the comedian was that there are actually five young Republicans out there.

To make matters worse, Colbert’s elder right-leaning compatriots are dying off. This led Colbert to take matters into his own hands, producing, narrating and starring in ultra-short documentary “The Gay Civil War.” He then slapped the PBS label on the cover, which we’re sure the publicly funded channel is thrilled about.

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