Something good—other than the amusement of the Internet at large—has come from that leaked letter written by University of Maryland’s Delta Gamma torturess Rebecca Martinson. Published last Thursday by Gawker, the expletive- and caps-ridden rant by the executive sorority-board member alerts her sisters that they “have been FUCKING UP” Greek week by acting “so fucking AWKWARD and so fucking BORING.” The e-mail rattles off the sisters’ offenses in between such epistolary gems as “Oh wait, DOUBLE FUCKING NEWSFLASH: SIGMA NU IS NOT GOING TO WANT TO HANG OUT WITH US IF WE FUCKING SUCK.” In short, it is phenomenal.

And now Oscar-nominated actor Michael Shannon gives the moodily lit, dramatic reading that Martinson’s letter so greatly deserves on Funny or Die. Covertly pull out the earplugs you have in your cubicle for these very NSFW occasions, watch, watch again, and then contemplate whether this makes Shannon an honorary Delta Gamma in the space below.

Michael Shannon Reads the Insane Delta Gamma Sorority Letter from Michael Shannon [#iframe: http://www.facebook.com/plugins/like.php?app_id=138711277798&href=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.funnyordie.com%2Fvideos%2F4ad20b4edf%2Fmichael-shannon-reads-the-insane-sorority-letter&send=false&layout=button_count&width=150&show_faces=false&action=like&height=21]||||||