

Thanks for the nice comments. I started to make a thread to say goodbye but saw this one. People need to realize I'm not moving on because of my new business-I'm moving on because of the abject failure of my most important mission in life.



Those of you who have followed this site for a few years know my wife Vivian has been fighting cancer for over ten years. She appears in a few of the clips on Let's Grow Mushrooms, which I got out and watched yesterday just to have a chance to see her smiling face again.



My baby, the love of my life and my very reason for living died in my arms over the holidays.



I suffered through 4 failed marriages before I found her. I always knew that with Vivian I had true love and that it wasn't conditional on being in a good mood, or having a good financial year, or always saying the right thing, etc. She was the only person I ever had who loved me no-matter-what and made sure I knew it. Now she's gone after 15 wonderful years, and I'm all alone up here in the middle of nowhere.



I started growing medicinal mushrooms instead of psychedelic when we met because I was sure I could save her. John Holliday of Aloha Medicinals graciously provided her with products not yet on market but which had shown promise in jump-starting the immune system. She got a medical marijuana card in 2000 and a designated provider certificate for me so I could grow medical pot. I've developed a high CBD strain that achieves nearly 20% CBD because it's rumored to impeded tumor growth.



Unfortunately, none of it worked and the only person I've ever truly loved in this world is gone. My heart is broken and I've spent most of the last three weeks curled up in a fetal position on the floor bawling my eyes out.



How can I continue to answer questions about mushroom growing when the most important reason for growing them in the first place turned out to be a devastating failure?



Our local newspaper did a front-page story on her. If anyone can get it, please post it here. If not, I'll try to scan it and get it posted in a few weeks. It's on the front page of the Jan 14, 2015 issue of the Ferry County View. It gives information that I've never released before about her life in Russia and the sacrifices her family went through to get to America.



Take care,

RR



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semper in excretia sumus solim profundum variat



"I've never had a failed experiment. I've only discovered 10,000 methods which do not work."

Thomas Edison



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