Polls suddenly accurate

An opinion poll showing the Conservatives losing up to 20 seats means that the polls have suddenly become accurate today.

Polls which showed a huge Conservative majority have been dismissed as wrong, misleading or downright lies for weeks, but that’s all changed now.

YouGov, the organisation which ran the poll, was until yesterday a Tory front organisation dedicated to doing Jeremy Corbyn down, but is now at the forefront of accurate data and should be taken as the blue riband standard of polling organisations.

Enthusiastic internet commenter Simon Williams, who has spent most of the last month dismissing the polls as propaganda and information warfare, was first to welcome the sudden accuracy of the data now it shows something he agrees with.

“Yes, I might have said that polls are just propaganda designed to fool the unthinking sheeple into staying at home and not voting as they wouldn’t think it worthwhile, but that was last week”, he told us.

“Things have changed with new information. When the facts change, I change my opinion,” he added primly.

When told that a second poll this morning showed a comfortable 12-point Conservative lead, Simon reacted like Luke Skywalker learning the identity of his father before saying that was just Tory lies and you can’t believe anything the polls say anyway.