photos by tri vo

Him: How’s your night going?

Me: Not bad. I had a show earlier, and I met a few of my idiot friends out here for a night cap. All in all, a decent showing for a Friday night, I guess…

Him: What? Why idiots?

Me: Oh, I just call my friends idiots. It’s a compliment, sort of. They’re funny people, and we usually wind up acting like idiots.

Him: I spent the evening alone.

Me: I’m sorry to hear that. Wait, by choice?

Him: No, just out of a lack of things to do.

Me: Oh, right, well then I’m sorry to hear that.

Him: Are you looking for a boyfriend?

Me: What?

Him: Are you looking for a boyfriend? Like, someone to settle down with?

Me: I dunno. I feel lonely sometimes.

Him: I feel lonely all the time. Completely alienated. Even in a crowd. Maybe especially.

Me: I think I understand what you mean. The world has become more alienating, somehow, as we increase our inter-connectivity with social media.

Him: Haha… Blame Facebook. (pause) Yeah. Facebook’s depressing.

Me: How do you mean?

Him: I wake up and check Facebook, and after a certain point i get depressed.

Me: Can you say why?

Him: It’s too much, maybe. All these links and photos. I saw pictures of my friends having a picnic, and I immediately got nostalgic. I used to just GO on picnics.

Me: Haha… I can see your point. Facebook has turned us all into voyeurs of the mundane.

Him: I think it’s evil. We used to call each other on the phone and catch up with each other, and now, instead we visit a friends Facebook page to scratch the itch of catching up with old friends. But it’s not interactive. It’s the illusion of interaction.

Me: Yeah. I get where you’re going. I try to keep my social media time as low as possible. And I try to isolate what I think Facebook is good for, and just do that.

Him: Like what?

Me: One liner jokes and self promotion.

Him: But that’s the problem. Everyone’s like that now, and NOBODY’S looking for a boyfriend.

Me: Haha… I guess you’re hunting for one?

Him: Yeah. I’m really lonely.

Me: I don’t like the idea of saying I’m looking for a boyfriend. I feel like it’s similar to saying ‘I don’t feel complete without being validated by somebody else.’

Him: Ugh. That’s how everyone feels. I just really want a boyfriend. I don’t care if it’s not a popular point of view.

Me: That’s pretty clear. It’s been my experience that people fall in love when they’re ready to do it – when the meet the exact right match for it. There’s no use putting it on a timetable, or trying to manufacture it.

Him: Why not?

Me: I dunno. Don’t you think that there’s already a lot of pressure, without adding expectations?

Him: It’s just that… New York men are just looking for the next person to have sex with. Nobody wants to settle down. I liked it better in Berlin.

Me: You lived in Berlin?

Him: Yeah.

Me: Of course you did.

Him: In Berlin, everyone wants to have a boyfriend. Then when they’ve been in a relationship for a little while, they start looking to ‘trade up.’

Me: Sounds like Boyfriend Hopscotch.

Him: Haha… I guess so. But I prefer it to this…

Me: May I make an observation?

Him: Okay.

Me: I think you might be depressed.

Him: You might be right. Aw. That’s so disappointing.

Me: What?

Him: You’re not looking for a boyfriend. But you’re going on a lot of dates.

Me: I’m meeting a lot of people, and writing about it.

Him: Yeah. I guess. Pardon me. I have to check my phone.

Me: Did you get a txt?

Him: No. I just want to check Facebook.

Me: Ah. Right.

Him: Don’t put this on your blog and call me a Jerk.

Me: I wouldn’t think of it. This conversation barely qualifies as interesting.

Him: Wow. Now you’re being a Jerk.

Me: I have my moments.