Matt Happel is a data tech for a healthcare origination—"The IT Guy." He maintains servers and networks carrying medical information which will keep you alive in emergencies. During the week, he wears clean slacks. On the weekend, he builds junker cars "that look like dog-**** but rip!"

"I'm not looking to get rich off this," said Happel "I make a good living. I just want to show people that you don't have to spend big money to make big power."

We were in his newest monstrosity, a 2005 faded-white, paint-peeling Chevrolet Colorado single-cab pickup. The headlights were glass-sealed-beams. I asked Happel if customers can still buy modern cars with sealed-beam headlights. Happel didn't think so. This Colorado had to be some kind of fleet vehicle, ordered in a lot of fifty by a gas or mining company in western Pennsylvania.

"There was lettering on the side of the bed, you can kind-of see it, but I can't make out what it said," noted Happel

The windows were crank. The radio was AM/FM. Coffee stains dotted the headliner. "It doesn't even have floor carpets," laughed Happel, stomping his sneaker on the floor, "there's this rubber or vinyl lining covering the whole floor of the cab. It's like...if your cat pees the rug all the time, you put this stuff down."

Happel looked to the right and placed both hands on the steering wheel, "Hold on," he said.

Happel looked to the right and placed both hands on the steering wheel, "Hold on," he said.

The 364 cubic-inch GM V8 instantly overpowered the rear tires and a intercooled turbocharger kept them spinning in the middle of Allentown traffic. Happel took his foot off the throttle and the turbo fluttered down. I looked out of the cab's rear window. A cloud of tire smoke covered a LANTA (Lehigh and Northampton Transportation Authority) bus terminal before dispersing to reveal thirty-foot long "11's."

"You just did a rolling burnout in traffic. People are looking." I said politely but nervously.

Happel smiled. "There's a used tire place back there on this street. I give them a lot of business." He looked at me and noticed my discomfort. "Don't worry, no one will know it was us that did that. I'm serious. If someone calls the cops, they [the police] will pull over the first Camaro they can find, or a juiced-up Dodge Ram Cummins truck with fender flares."

I settle back on the passenger side of the cloth bench seat.

"You hungry?" asked Happel.

"I always can eat," I said.

"Yaccos?"

"I haven't had their hot dogs in forever."

"Ok, We'll go for lunch and I'll tell you all about how I made this [truck]."

Yaccos Hot Dogs is a small chain of eateries around the Allentown area of Pennsylvania. It's a appropriate place to stop if you're a gearhead because the chain was started by Lee Iacocca's uncle, Theadore Iacocca.

Two hotdogs—my standard. "Give me the list," I said, "How did you turn a Colorado into Up Jumped The Devil?"

"It's less than you'd think," said Happel.

Here's the material you need to make your very own sleeper pickup:

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2005 Chevy Colorado (fleet vehicle) with 186,000 miles



2006 6.0L GM LS LQ4 V8 with 280,000 miles pulled from a 3500 Chevy Express Van



JFR Turbo camshaft Pac-Valve 1218 valve springs



Stock intake, oil pan, rockers, lifters, and 4L80-E 4-speed automatic transmission



Trans-Go HD2 valve body kit



PTC Performance lockup torque converter



On3 Performance turbocharger (78mm compressor, 75mm turbine)



Turbo "hot side" built by Cory Johnson, "cold side" built by Matt Happel



VS Racing Air-Air intercooler



Scrap 3-inch piping



Ford Explorer 8.8 rear axle cut to fit with 3.73 gears and Limited-Slip



Used tires



Power output: 430hp



Happel didn't keep all the receipts. When I asked him for a total build cost he assured me that he spent less than $9,000 all together.



"Most of the LS engine is stock?" I asked.

"That's what I said, yea," nodded Happel, "Most people think you need to have all kinds of shiny stuff under the hood to go fast. I mean, you go to car events and even drag shows and you'll see lots of accessories that don't need to be there—even roller-rockers. You don't need them unless you're a race team and you're making a push-rod engine which will spend its entire life above 6,000 RPM."

Happel placed his hands on the table.

"So many car builds today are all about shiny steel headers, a massive chrome sheet metal intake manifold, and throttle bodies big enough to put your fist though...and putting down mediocre numbers at the track. Everyone has all this gleaming crap with beautiful wheels on—but they'll be 20's. They'll have drag radials on but they can't hook, and a rear-end that doesn't work. And...and they can't do anything with their car."

Happel continued, "After ten years of doing this [building cars], the biggest thing I've learned is you really don't need anything. You can use almost all the stock engine components. And we proved this with a Mustang that ran a 7.80 at 170mph!

"What?" I interrupted.



"Swear to God, 7.8 seconds with a simple air to air intercooler and stock intake, heads, throttle... etc. And what's funnier, it did 8.30's a 160 on pump gas, regular 'ol Wawa pump-gas. We had DOT radial tires. And everyone asked how the **** does this car go so fast? And they would come over and we'd pop the hood and they would see overwhelming amounts of mediocrity, and be very confused. They would see a stock LS engine with a stock intake manifold which is still small to a lot of people."

Matt Happel finished his food and turned over his trump card. "I do R&D for EFI Source Electronics in Boyertown. If you ever bought an ECU from EFI Electronics, for LS applications, you're running my base tune." Happel told me that he's a total nerd for electronic tuning and that LS motors are far more tweakable than people give them credit for.

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It was my turn to drive. I took it easy driving out from Yacco's and gave tentative pokes at the throttle. The Turbo LS V8 responded so fast, I backed off before my next breath.

"You didn't even get out of the converter!" laughed Happel, "When you do that—the stabby thing with your foot, all you're doing is spinning the torque converter. It's a high-stall converter up around 2,000 rpm so you can spin up the turbo before it hooks up the rear. I mean, yea there's some power going to the rear and you do accelerate when you do that but...stay in it more next time."

I see a Monte Carlo in the slow lane and press the gas pedel with my big toe and hold it down a second longer. The engine surges. The turbo howls. The sensation is Tesla-esque. Happel grins, "Punchy, isn't it?"

The sensation is Tesla-esque. Happel grins, "Punchy, isn't it?"

"I've built cars for $4,200 that went low 10's in the quarter mile," Happel said very matter-of-factually. "Which is absurd because if you consider that a Dodge Hellcat barely clicks-off high 10's in perfect conditions. Everyone is really quick to buy stainless fuel lines but rubber lines work fine. Then they're quick to replace the intake and throttle for something prettier when in reality it's hurting them. You can make tons of power and go plenty fast on stock junkyard stuff. For instance, Mark's Mustang that went 7's...it pinned my old dyno at 1,000hp with stock truck manifolds—iron, ugly exhaust manifolds that people would throw out and replace with stainless show headers that maybe would fit right or burn plugs and cost a lot of money. People are funny, they come to me and say they want to build a budget race car. So, I'll get them a $200 motor. But then they don't want it, they want to pay more for a clean low-mile motor. Fine. But then, they want to take it apart, completely rebuild it, machine shop, the works...and I'm thinking... "where is the budget?! Ha! Budget Race Car! If the motor was already running in great shape, why take it apart? That's what people do with these turbo LS cars. Then they change the oil pump, put on rod bolts and then have oil pressure and reliability issues."

I continue driving and according the LS Colorado's ferocious acceleration. This must be what it feels like to be a high level Jiu-Jitsu fighter, or a top-level kickboxer with an excellent striking game—I could walk though any crowd with calm knowledge that I have the tools to dismantle any mook who would attack me. No one would suspect I am a champion! No other drivers would know this base-level-fleet-looking white pickup is the fastest thing on I-78 right now.

"I give away all my information on sloppymechanics.com for free. Other people have done LS swaps with tunes but I'm the only one I know who gives away all my combinations and tunes—I don't stand to profit off anything. Go to my website and download it all, they're .zip files all for you."

I asked Happel what people should take-away from this interview, if they're just getting started.

"People will start by thinking that they can't buy something that is cheap and effective. They'll think they can't have something that performs for under $25,000. Or they'll think that because their friend has a $3,000 Holly Dominatior system, they need either that or it's price-point equivalent. What they don't know is that a $300 Megasquirt based ECU that I programmed will run 8's all day."

"What should people take away from your work?" I asked, looking for a close.

"Before you pick up a wrench, pick up a laptop. There's so much more in your engine as it sits—repurpose and reuse."

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