Day one

Learn more about this silly experiment with DoNotPay in the post Here We Are.

When I first opened DoNotPay, I was a bit overwhelmed by the many options on the main screen. Looking through the different options, only a couple of them looked like they might help me. Curiously, I clicked the "I am owed $500+" button. The interface is largely done through prompted messaging. My message sent to the Robot Lawyer stated:

"I want to sue someone."

Pausing to think of someone to sue, no one came to mind. So I went back to the previous screen. The next button that interested me was "Find Hidden Money." Who doesn't like free money? Well, except tax experts. My new message to the Robot Lawyer said:

"I don't have a problem, but want you to find some money for me."

That's better.

I was prompted to select from a list of options:

Manage My Subscriptions (not necessary at the moment)

(not necessary at the moment) Appeal Bank Fees (I use Simple, so no banks fees for me!)

(I use Simple, so no banks fees for me!) Get Free Fast Food (No thanks, I'm trying to stop eating big macs)

(No thanks, I'm trying to stop eating big macs) Free Birthday Gift (It waaas just my birthday a week or so ago...)

I selected Free Birthday Gift, and the Robot mentions:

With DoNotPay, every day is your birthday! Our bots crawl the web looking for free stuff, including "birthday gifts" offered by retailers.

Interesting. So I can do this each and every day...

Then they presented me a list of categories to choose from: food, fashion, entertainment and random. Not knowing what to choose, I selected random.

The Robot Lawyer gave me a digital high five and then asked me to wait up to 2 hours. Yup, 2 hours for the their bots to scour the internet to tell me I can get something for free.

3 steps to your free gift.

Impatiently, I decided to look at the main screen again to see if there was anything else interesting. Looking at the "Government Paperwork" button, I was reminded that I needed to renew my Canadian passport (where my citizenship lies), but I live in the United States. I figured this might be a tough ask, but ultimately decided it was a good test. Sending this info to the Robot Lawyer was akin to filling out a basic contact form, with the confirmation message saying "Please wait up to 48 hours for a response." Wow. I could probably conduct some good Google-fu in that amount of time, but I can be patient.

My "free birthday gift" still hadn't arrived, so I decided to try another gift category to see if it might be faster. This time I chose entertainment, because I enjoy being entertained like the blind sheep that I am. Aaaand I was told to wait an hour.

2 hours later...

I see a notification on my screen from DoNotPay and open the app. I'm presented with both my free gifts:

A code for 10% OFF from Family Video (they're still in business?)

$20 Off $120 from Foot Locker

If my mother gave these to me for my birthday, I would get the hint and find a new family. This just confirms that there is no such thing as a free lunch.

Just to see if these are typical of the "Free Birthday Gifts," I decided to try out Food and Fashion as well. Even though I was told it would be about an hour, they did not arrive today.

Day 1 stats:

Money spent: $0

$0 Money saved: $0

$0 Money earned: $0

$0 Time saved: -20 minutes

If you want to support me:

Try DoNotPay yourself. You'll get 2,000 points (about $2 USD) using this link!

Try DigitalOcean which is used to host this site. You'll receive a $50 credit towards your first 30 days of hosting using this link!

Try Huel which is my favorite meal replacement powder. You'll save $15 off your first order using this link! I drink this every day for lunch. I enjoy it much more than Soylent and I'm always surprised by how full it makes me feel.