My mom once said to me, “if you ever have car troubles but don’t know what the problem is, don’t take it in to a mechanic because they will try to sell you things you don’t need. Instead park yourself on the side of the highway, pop your hood, and look confused. Some mechanic will pull over to help and he’ll tell you what the problem is for free.” And that’s the day I realized that I could make the patriarchy work for me.