Earl Ehrhart, the longest-serving Republican in the Georgia House and an avid pre-Civil War reenactor, has officially announced his retirement from politics. His departure will leave a gaping hole of racism, misogyny, and homophobia that even Steve Bannon on steroids would struggle to fill.

In light of Georgia’s most prominent Professor Umbridge impersonator leaving office, Georgia Tech has revealed modified plans for Georgia Tech’s library renovation. The Earl Ehrhart Library, named in honor of the state’s most accomplished suppressor of minorities, marginalized groups and dreams, is set to unveil innovations the likes of which have never been seen in a collegiate environment.

Jimothy Beauregard Robert E. Lee Jackson IV, the architect hired to implement the new features, spoke glowingly about his plans:

“I want to make this magnificent library a testament to the values that Mr. Ehrhart believes Georgia Tech should embody. That’s why we’ve included amenities meant to make this so much more than just a place where students can educate themselves with fake news from books and peer-reviewed journals.”

Among the amenities included, the following stood out: