Enigma of the Sea Trombone By TrollMans Watch

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Patrolling along the edge of the continental shelf for the mollusc prey he relishes, a Carinodens picks up the scent of a potential meal in the water nearby. However, he discovers not the familiar sight of a coiled or bivalved shell, but a strange aberration as large as he is. It smells like prey, but looks like some non-euclidean, semi-corporeal polyp being, the mere existence of which spits at the constructed laws of tangible reality.



Is something so bizarre even edible? He doesn't know.



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Late Maastrichtian (66 MYA), Netherlands



Diplomoceras cylindraceum (cylinder-like diploma(?) horn)- a species of heteromorph ammonite known from the Late Campanian to Maastrichtian of shallow seas worldwide. Like many heteromorphic ammonites, its shell was unwound, and in this case, extremely elongated; individuals of the species could be over two metres in shell length (over four metres if measured from the tip of the coil to the head end). The shape grew into the paperclip-like form as the animal matured, and the youngest ammonites were straight-shelled. As with most heteromorph ammonites, it is unknown what the purpose of such a shape was for, although it probably was not hydrodynamic, which may indicate a primarily benthic existence. Despite the strange shape of the shell, fossils indicate the species was extremely successful, being relatively long lived and known from hundreds of fossils (which may suggest, that like many cephalopods, it lived in shoals) on every continent. Fossils of similarly shaped close relatives imply however strange the shape was, it was a winner.



Carinodens belgicus (Belgic keeled teeth)- a species of mosasaur known from the Maastrichtian of Eastern Europe and Morocco. This is one of the smallest known species of mosasaurs, reaching only around three metres in length. A close relative and sister taxon to the larger Globidens, and similar to its relative, was probably durophagous. Its back teeth were rounded and blunt, suggesting that they were used to crush hard-shelled prey like crustaceans, ammonites, bivalves, and nautiloids, which were common in the environments it is known from. It had heterodont dentition, as the front teeth were thinner and pointier, probably being used to snag prey before bringing the food item to the back teeth for mastication. Its fossils are relatively uncommon in the Maastricht Formation despite the abundance of potential prey, possibly suggesting that its preferred habitat were away from the shallows, where its far more massive relatives would have patrolled.



- some pycnodonts ( Anomoeodus subclavatus) and their limpet prey; appearance is speculative as the species is known only from teeth.



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Ah, heteromorph ammonoids, truly the strangest animals that have existed on Earth. And not just because we really have no idea how they even existed, but because they weren't just some sort of evolutionary dead-end one-off. Oh no, they were very successful; fossils of Diplomoceras cylindraceum indicate it lasted at least five million years and was widespread, with fossils known from all seven continents, lasting until the very end of the Maastrichtian, and this "paperclip" design was present in many other related species for millions of years prior as well.



And we also got heteromorph ammonites that look like soft-serve ice cream covered in spikes, jumbled up slinkies, spiny saxophones, just poles, and other shapes that are really indescribable. And of course in life, there would have been tentacles sticking out of one end. Their massive success despite looking like something that should have been abandoned back in the Cambrian defies reasonable human explanation. Some deity (or more likely, all deities in an overwhelming vote) must have sent that asteroid because they were getting too powerful.

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Published : Feb 3, 2019