if Chapman were ever released on parole

Said she would be

In a wide-ranging interview, Yoko Ono has revealed she is still scared of John Lennon's killer - and talks about her late husband's long-rumored bisexuality.

In the exclusive sit-down with The Daily Beast, Ono, 82, also speaks of how she stopped using drugs after The Beatle's death in order to remain 'super-clear' and be a good mother.

The oddball artist admitted she remained fearful of Mark David Chapman, who shot Lennon outside the couple's Manhattan apartment building - the Dakota, where Ono still lives - in 1980.

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Scared: Yoko Ono (pictured at a peace rally on October 6) says she's still afraid of John Lennon's killer, who remains in jail. The couple (pictured right) were married for 11 years

Ono, who has a son Sean, with Lennon, said: 'At the time, they could have done it, too. I was really lucky that I didn't die with John.

'If that had happened, what would have happened to Sean?'

Killer: Mark David Chapman, pictured after his arrest, has been denied parole eight times

Ono told The Daily Beast she still has to be 'super-careful, almost like a certain animal who is used to being hunted,' and employs personal security both for when she is at home and when she goes out out.

'So when I go out or when I don't go out, in my apartment, I'm very, very careful.

'It's very, very difficult for me to think about Chapman, especially because he doesn't seem to think that was a bad thing to do.

'It's crazy.'

Chapman was denied parole for the eighth time last year. His wife has to written Ono - who has publicly opposed each parole request - asking her to forgive him.

But Ono said she would be 'concerned' if Chapman was paroled.

'I said he's crazy, but probably not - probably he had a purpose he wanted to accomplish like "Kill John Lennon".

'So he might have another purpose. He's not the kind of person who's… I don't think he's just doing it emotionally.

'There is a reason, whether a simple reason or not, to do what he does, and justify it. So that's very scary.'

Ono, who is originally from Japan, progresses to talk about Lennon's fluid sexuality after being asked about her own, which she describes as 'extremely old-fashioned'.

Love affair? There were rumors of a relationship between Lennon and Beatles manager Brian Epstein (pictured together in 1964) when he was married to his first wife, Cynthia

Lennon (left in 1969) and Epstein (in 1966) and went on a vacation to Barcelona together when Cynthia was pregnant with Lennon's son Julian

'Many people think I'm a strong woman. I never thought that, but probably I am,' she said.

'Maybe they think I really don't go for men but it's not true. I like normal relationships ... whatever ''a normal relationship'' is.'

Lennon was long thought to have had an affair with Brian Epstein, the gay manager of The Beatles.

A fictionalized story of the romance was made into a film, The Hours and Times, in 1992.

The movie, centered around Epstein's crush on Lennon, won an award at the Sundance Film Festival.

Rumors about the two started swirling when Lennon - whose wife at the time, Cynthia, was pregnant with their son Julian - went on a vacation with Epstein to Barcelona, according to The Beatle's Bible.

Brian Epstein (seen in 1964) was open with the band about being gay. He died from an overdose in 1967, when he was 32

Lennon said afterwards: 'I was on holiday with Brian Epstein in Spain, where the rumors went around that he and I were having a love affair.

'Well, it was almost a love affair, but not quite.

'It was never consummated. But it was a pretty intense relationship.

'It was my first experience with a homosexual that I was conscious was homosexual.'

However Lennon's friend Pete Shotton would later say that the star told him he had allowed Epstein to 't*ss him off'.

Ono, in her new interview, said she and Lennon had long conversations about bisexuality in which he said he believed everyone is likely bisexual - but is inhibited from exploring it because of society.

'So we are hiding the other side of ourselves, which is less acceptable,' Ono said.

She was then questioned about the supposed affair between Lennon and Epstein.

'Uh, well, the story I was told was a very explicit story, and from that I think they didn't have it [sex],' she said.

Ono went on to say she believed Lennon 'admitted' to the relationship when it didn't necessarily happen.

'But they went to Spain, and when they came back tons of reporters were asking, ''Did you do it, did you do it?'' So he said, ''I did it,''' she said.

'Isn't that amazing?

'But of course he would say that. I'm sure Brian Epstein made a move, yeah.

'(Lennon) just didn't want to do it, I think.'

Ono, pictured with Lennon in 1971, believes he wanted to be intimate with men but never was

Ono said she doesn't believe Lennon ever had sex with a man - but likely wanted to.

'No, I don't think so,' Ono told The Daily Beast. 'I think he had a desire to, but I think he was too inhibited.

'The beginning of the year he was killed, he said to me, ''I could have done it, but I can't because I just never found somebody that was that attractive."

'Both John and I were into attractiveness - you know - beauty.'

Ono also opened up about her use of drugs. She said that she didn't ever like marijuana but would pretend to smoke it in a social situation.

Ono added that after doing 'a lot' of drugs in the 60s and 70s, she stopped after Lennon died - even though doctors offered to give her morphine 'every day'.

In a new interview, Yoko Ono (pictured with Lennon in 1972) has explained how she still fears for her life after his murder in 1980

'What happened was that I suddenly realized I had extra responsibility on many levels, so I couldn't be taking anything,' the mom of one told The Daily Beast.

'The first night they gave me morphine but from then on I didn't take anything. I couldn't do it.

'I had to be super-clear to take on the business situation, the political situation, everything.

'And then I think I took some drugs, sort of like designer drugs or something.

'It wasn't very good and I just didn't feel right.'