Bournemouth’s record signing says he deserved more of a chance at the Emirates but is not bitter and feels his loan experience elsewhere raised his confidence

If goals are a form of social currency then Benik Afobe may soon be drowning in invitations. “I’ve been lucky,” says the Bournemouth striker of a settling-in process that, on and off the field, has been as quick as anyone at the Vitality Stadium can recall. “When you score, people will enjoy your company more. But it’s not just about goals – it’s about feeling at home, and I really do.”

Afobe was able to say the same of Arsenal for more than 15 years and it will be lost on no one that the 22-year-old, who left north London for Wolverhampton Wanderers in January 2015 after two long-term injuries and a succession of loans had stalled his path to the first team, will face his former club on Sunday at a time of stark contrast in their potency. Arsenal have failed to score in three Premier League fixtures while Afobe, who became Bournemouth’s record signing last month, has managed a goal a game over the same period.

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There are no regrets on Afobe’s side but it is still striking to hear how impersonally football clubs can deal with players who have, in one way or another, been part of the fabric for so long. Afobe was on loan at MK Dons, finally enjoying both the regular football and form in front of goal he had craved, when Wolves’ bid was accepted and there was no grand farewell, no return to shake hands, no explanatory phone call between then and his first training session with the Championship club.

“I could probably have asked but I didn’t want to hear anything,” Afobe says. “I thought: ‘I’m confident, scoring goals, I don’t need to hear anything negative.’

“I love them, love everyone at Arsenal, but it would have been nice to have got my chance because, to be honest, I don’t think I got a fair chance in the first team. I never made an appearance while there have been players who haven’t had great Arsenal careers who played five or 10 games, but that’s a story for another day.

“Maybe it was better to leave Arsenal without playing a game because everyone knows I didn’t get a chance. If I had played four or five games and was terrible, you start thinking you are an Arsenal reject. For me it was just that the chance didn’t come.”

Confidence should not be mistaken for bitterness; Afobe would never have a bad word for anyone at Arsenal and the feeling would be reciprocated towards as courteous and good-humoured a young man as has passed through the club’s academy. Many fall by the wayside when success does not come instantly but Afobe had the self-awareness to understand that his surroundings came with no guarantees.

“There was a stage where I was not so much doubting my ability, but doubting if I would be the player I thought I would be,” he says. “It was more that the process was taking much longer than I thought it would.

“At Arsenal you’re training with England Under-19 players, you’re seeing Fàbregas or Van Persie next to you in the dressing room, and you think – not in an arrogant way, but you do think it – ‘I am here, I am not far away.’ But you are. Sitting in the same changing room, having a joke with them, having dinner out with them, you have to know that these players are miles ahead in terms of what they have done.”

The biggest period of reflection came towards the end of an unhappy loan at Sheffield Wednesday in 2014. Afobe had just returned from an eight-month knee injury and never felt quite himself during 13 games that brought two goals. Previous spells at Huddersfield Town, Reading, Bolton Wanderers and Millwall had held various merit but there was the acute feeling things were slipping away.

“It got to me a lot,” he says. “I’ve always dreamed of scoring goals in the Premier League and I started to think to myself: ‘Will I ever get this chance?’

“The penny dropped around the final game of the season. I’d been telling my mates: ‘Yeah, we’re going on holiday, we’re going to do this and this for a few weeks,’ but then I thought: ‘Do you know what? If you don’t buck your ideas up you’re just going to be a player that falls away, a what-could-have-been kind of player’.”

Going out on loan, being unsuccessful, living in different parts of England – all that has helped me a lot

The holiday – it would have been to New York – was postponed and Afobe set about preparing body and mind for a pre-season in which he felt far more like the explosive, cold-blooded forward who had been prolific at all junior levels from the age of six. He ate better, slept better, decided this was the time to start from scratch. Nineteen goals followed over a remarkable half-season in Milton Keynes, quickly forming an intuitive relationship with Dele Alli that set Karl Robinson’s team fair for promotion from League One.

“He was my room-mate at the time,” says Afobe of Alli, whom he regularly texts to congratulate on his exploits for Tottenham Hotspur. “It was nice to see an 18-year-old playing with such a smile on his face. I think we had eight different celebrations – we knew one of us would score and it goes to the stage where we would say ‘when you score, let’s do this’. We had a great partnership on and off the pitch.”

Afobe keeps some high-profile company. Jack Wilshere is one of his closest friends while Ross Barkley is among those to have become an ally during years in the England setup that included a victorious Uefa Under-17 Championship in 2010. There is also Harry Kane, whom he outscored by one goal – 32 to 31 – last season and played alongside during his early years in Arsenal’s academy.

“I remember playing up front with him,” he says. “He was only small at the time, a bit of a late developer, but he always loved scoring goals. It’s weird because he used to play in goal sometimes, and wasn’t bad actually. You wouldn’t think it – remember that goal he let in for Tottenham when he had go in [against Asteras] last season?”

Afobe says he feels like a “proud brother” when he sees Kane and Alli doing well and senses that all three are among those at the vanguard of a young English generation that is beginning to deliver regularly in the top flight.

“I saw the stats on Tuesday – 16 goalscorers in the Premier League, and 11 of them English,” he says, having contributed one himself in Bournemouth’s 2-1 win over Crystal Palace. “We are starting to make a name for ourselves, and it’s even better when players from lower leagues have stepped up and done well. Harry, Dele, me, we’ve all gone out on loan and it shows it can be done. It shows players outside the Premier League that they can make the step up.”

Afobe remembers his agent telling him, upon the move to Wolves, that a stint longer than two years at Molineux would have meant he was doing something wrong in his career. By that measure he is ahead of schedule and feels Eddie Howe, who convinced him to join Bournemouth during a phone call in which he outlined with clarity the areas where Afobe excelled and could improve, has immediately made him a better player. The memory of Arsenal will become more vivid this weekend but he believes his decade and a half of ups and downs in north London created the character whose trajectory could barely have been steeper in the last 18 months.

“Right now, I think mentality is probably my best attribute,” he says. “I don’t get scared, don’t fear anyone. Going out on loan, being unsuccessful, living in different parts of England – all that has helped me a lot. I think my mental strength came from that. I wouldn’t have had it if I broke through at Arsenal when I was 18.”