Okay, the title’s misleading: Mayuri isn’t necessarily an evil mastermind. But she’s definitely a mastermind, alignment pending.

While contemplating my favorite show this season that’s not about underage succubi princesses and cognitively-impaired mutants, I got to wondering: what purpose does Mayuri serve on Steins;Gate, exactly? She’s just kind of there. The more I thought about it, however, the more I realized that not only is everything about Mayuri, but she must be a genius the likes of which Okarin and “Christina” can only imagine.

Here are just some of the reason why Mayuri must be the key to the kind-of-sort-of puzzle that is S;G.

1. Only Character Smart Enough to Dress for the Weather

I think the animators do a good job of making it look like summer; I don’t know about you, but I always get the impression it’s about 95 degrees in the Future Gadget Lab. Meanwhile, how do Okarin and Kurisu dress? In heavy coats, which the latter complements with opaque black leggings. Talk about impractical.

How does Mayuri dress? In a light cotton sundress that breathes well, and a practical hat that protects her face and eyes from the ravages of the summer sun; an outfit intended to reduce sweating, without being too revealing. It’s economical, fashionable and effective; now, who’s the genius in this group? You tell me.

2. Op-Dominance

This is kind of meta, but Mayuri’s importance in the OP leads one to believe that she is somehow central to the events that transpire; something she’s unlikely to be if all she’s capable of is being cute and announcing her presence with “do-do-DOO!” Either the OP is a lying bastard, or she’s holding out on us so far.



3. Her ‘Reaching for the Sun’ Thing

Mayuri’s constant reaching toward the sun is obviously symbolic of her desire to transcend human limitations, i.e. transcend TIME ITSELF. Going back to the OP, notice how Mayuri and Feyris reach toward the sun, while Kurisu only points her arm to the side, emulating the clock?



4. Third-Person Person

As a person who has transcended time, she is simultaneously Mayuri and Not-Mayuri; for this reason, she speaks about herself in the third person to make it clear that she’s talking about the part of herself that exists in that present time. She can’t say “I”, because that “I” comprises countless past and future selves that are all conducting different activities. Instead, when she says “Mayushii does X,” what she’s really saying is “The version of Mayuri that you are acquainted with is currently performing this action.”



5. The Feyris Factor

Did you notice that Feyris beat Daru at a game- Daru, who hacked into the CERN computer– easily during the Feyris Cup? Obviously Feyris-“Moepocalypse”-Tan has quite a lot going on in the intelligence department. And who’s her friend? Do you think Feyris keeps company with dumb people?



6. She May Have Built the Phone Microwave (name subject to change)

As far as we know, the Future Gadget Lab “acquired” the Phone Microwave- there’s no proof that either Okarin or Daru built it as far as I can tell. Who does that leave? Keep in mind, it was Mayuri who knew where to get the IBN 500 as well- at least, in the timeline when it was available….



7. Okarin’s ‘Power’ Likely Comes from Her

Time to spell out the theory I’ve been dancing around here: Mayuri is a time traveler who invented a time travel device long before the Future Gadget Lab was a thing. She’s been all over the place in time, but since she loves Okarin, she wants him to be special too. Hence, she sets him up to be the Messiah; he has extra-time sensitivity by virtue of being the closest person to Mayuri, thus has always had a kind of front-row seat to time abnormalities. Kind of like Homura’s relationship to Madoka, only with good old-fashioned hetero subtext instead of yuri subtext.

8. Steins; Gate? More like MAYURIGATE!!!

Ultimately, it comes down to this: EinStein’s theory; Mayuri’s Gate. And see? That mysterious semicolon makes perfect sense!

Final Thoughts:

Just so you know, this whole thing started as a joke, but now I’ve thoroughly convinced myself. After all, the Church of Madoka is just so last-season: It’s time for the religion of Mayuri, Time Goddess.



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