Honda

M. Márquez (1st)

“I think my friend Valentino had a great season. Especially considering his age. As my friend I’m sure he is also very happy that I won again.”

J. Lorenzo (13th)

“I invited all my friends to a party to celebrate my final race…and they all turned up. I’m scared and confused.”

J. Zarco (DNF)

“Look French Johann…walk away from the crash with your back to the track like in a uninterested, moody manner…”

C. Crutchlow (DNF)

“Wait! Just because I didn’t implicity state that Alex Marquez doesn’t deserve a factory Honda doesn’t mean he does! He doesn’t. He crashes too much…”

Yamaha

F. Quartararo (2nd)

“Yamaha have assured me that my 2020 bike won’t have any ‘Team46 override’ issues.”

M. Viñales (6th)

“I think Quartararo should move to Ducati.”

V. Rossi (8th)

Via Rossi Fan Club

“The all new 2020 ‘blame the engine’ t-shirts are now available”

F. Morbidelli (DNF)

“I fell off on purpose Vale. I did it for you so you finished higher and so you were not the last Yamaha finisher. Will you invite me to your sleepovers again now? Jordy Chandler says I need to let it go.”

Ducati

J. Miller (3rd)

“Can’t believe Jorge didn’t invite me to his press conference. I had some great jokes about him being on holiday all season…”

A. Dovizioso (4th)

“No one even cares anymore. I’m the unnoticed nearly man. I could write anything in the excellent Quote Factory and everyone would just skip over it. In fact has anyone even read this far?”

T. Rabat (11th)

“Sorry Karel…looks like I’m richer than you…”

K. Abraham (14th)

“What’s all this talk of Zarco replacing me? I’ve checked his net worth and he’s not nearly as rich as me.”

D. Petrucci (DNF)

“I thunk you’ll find Mr Domenicali my contract is as watertight as an otter’s kidney”

M. Pirro (DNF)

“Today I concentrated on testing how the Ducati crashes in readiness for Zarco joining us.”

F.Bagnaia (DNS)

“Not sure if this four finger braking method is for me.”

Suzuki

Á. Rins (5th)

“A great end to a great MotoGP season. Who can forget the classic races at say Texas and Silverstone?”

Aprilia

A. Espargaró (9th)

“Hang on, which one am I again? The older one on the KTM?”

A. Iannone (DNF)

“I will be releasing a limited edition perfume that’s overpriced and has a disappointing smell that ends with smokey notes.”

KTM

P. Espargaró (10th)

“I thought I was on the KTM? Or am I older?”

M. Kallio (12th)

“Okay so I’m not fast enough to race but at least I’m KTM’s top tester…oh…wait…”

H. Syahrin (15th)

“I think ‘the fish’ showed newboy Lecuona how to do it. I seem to remember passing him like he was standing still.”

I. Lecuona (DNF)

“KTM told me my target for the race was Zarco.”