Me: “Thank you for calling [Tech Support]. What is the problem with your telephone line?”

Customer: “The squirrels.”

Me: “The… what? Sorry?”

Customer: “Those d*** squirrels are watching me.”

Me: “Uh… do you have a problem with your telephone line?”

Customer: “Yes, the squirrels have nested on it, and they watch me while I’m sleeping…”

Me: “I’m sure they’re not.”

Customer: “You calling me a liar?”