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Former "Survivor" runner-up Jessica Kiper was busted for DWI Saturday in New Orleans ... so she did what any other drunk fame-monger would do -- she snapped a selfie in the cop car.

Jessica -- who finished 3rd on Season 17 (and later appeared on "Celebrity Rehab") -- allegedly plowed into the back of another vehicle parked outside of a local high school.

Cops say Jessica was clearly hammered, so she was arrested and taken to the back of a squad car ... where she managed to snap a selfie. She was later taken to jail where she was booked and eventually released.

But the next day, Jessica posted the selfie along with a rambling caption making fun of the situation ... saying, "In my 8 hours [in jail] I made my weakest cell mate my bitch."

She added, "#survivor was worse. Crossing this off my bucket list. #wakeupcall."

Jessica also predicted, "My mugshot is going to be as bad as my yearbook photos."