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Location: crown heights

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b) did you kill the birdc) it died horribly, that much was cleard) you're psychoe) do I know youf) if I do know you I don't want to know youg) if I don't know you, what did I do to inspire you to put a dead bird in my mailboxh) I don't know how to disinfect a mailbox from a dead bird, I'm worried about diseases and have used five different kinds of cleaner but still feel like the bird's still in there still and like my bills and my catalogues and my coupons have dead bird on themi) it was a hummingbird, I looked it up - they don't even live in New York - this is so f*ing psycho, I can't believe thisj) are you the mailman?k) I'm always nice to the mailmanl) the super didn't care when I told him what happenedm) the neighbors didn't care eithern) do you have some kind of problem with birdso) don't put anything else in my mailboxp) unless it's an apologyq) no, I take that back, I don't even want an apologyr) what am I supposed to do with this bird - it's in bubblewrap in a bag in a shoebox in the freezer right now - am I supposed to bury it - where? how? in a construction site where they've jackhammered through the concrete - where is a person supposed to bury things in this city?s) I could drop it in the Gowanus canal, but that seems undignifiedt) I could drop it in the ocean, but the ocean is so big and it is such a small birdu) I could drop it in the toilet but it would probably get stuckv) I hear this whirring around my ears every time I go to the mailbox and I'm pretty sure it's ghost bird, and I'm all "it wasn't me that killed you, bird!" but still the whirring doesn't go away until I get to the stairwellw) am I supposed to eat it - maybe you were trying to feed me - don't you know I'm a vegetarianx) if this was Ricky, I'm gonna beat your ass, mama told you stop bothering the zooy) if this was Gina, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, how many times I gotta say I'm sorryz) I could drop it off the roof, maybe it will reincarnate while falling and I can start reading my mail again