Donald Trump should honestly enter a roast fest.

Years before he was President and Tweeter in Chief, Donald Trump was a billionaire and the face of “The Apprentice.” One of his ratings rivals was Richard Branson, the Virgin airlines mogul who was pushing a similarly premised TV show, “The Rebel Billionaire: Branson’s Quest For The Best.”

So Trump got down to business in 2004 and penned a letter to Branson, warning him not to mess with him or “The Apprentice” model.

Dear Richard, Now that I have watched your show, I wish you came to me and asked my advice – I would have told you not to bother. You have no television persona and, as I found out with others a long time ago, if it’s not there there’s not a thing in the world you can do about it. At least your dismal ratings can now allow you to concentrate on your airline which, I am sure, needs every ounce of your energy. It is obviously a terrible business and I can’t imagine, with fuel prices etc., that you can be doing any better in it than anyone else. Like television, you should try to get out the airline business too, as soon as possible! Actually, I wonder out loud how you can be anywhere close to a billionaire and be in that business. Perhaps the title of your show, The Rebel Billionaire, is misleading? In any event, do not use me to promote your rapidly sinking show – you are a big boy, try doing it yourself! Sincerely, Donald J. Trump

I mean this letter is what dreams are made of. Seriously. This is a 7 line roast fest that people would pay to read. Producers spend months trying to fabricate drama like this, and here it is in plain sight for everyone to view. For free. It doesn’t get much better than this on a Monday.

What we see here is Donald Trump making his public debut as an alpha. He basically tells Branson that his show tanked because he didn’t consult with Trump beforehand. Then he goes on to say he’s too boring for television and his airline is failing. And it wouldn’t be a true Trump letter without referencing ratings, which he does in line 2.

Then he actually tells Branson to not only get out of TV but also out of the airline business, since he’s not a real billionaire and he’s using Trump to prop up his status.

He ties it all together with the “big boy” label, which is classic DJT. This is a clear indication that he’s testing out the nickname waters. It’s not quite Rocket Man caliber, but it has a similar flair to it.

I think we can all agree that this letter indicates that Trump was born to be an alpha and that’s why he’s our president. It also helps to explain the maniacal tear Branson’s been on against Trump since the election.