The capital’s cycling campaigners seem to be outraged by suggestions that cyclists should start taking more responsibility for their safety

I’m thinking of ordering a personalised hi-vis jacket with a snappy message for London cyclists: PLEASE DON’T RUN ME OVER – I CAMPAIGN FOR CYCLING TOO.

After the deaths of six London riders in a fortnight, you might think I would be feeling sympathy, not just for the victims and their families, but for all London cyclists. Instead I’m feeling increasingly disturbed by what I see and read. Why?

On Monday night I was crossing Waterloo Road outside the station with the pedestrian lights on green shortly before 11 pm, when two male cyclists sped towards me in quick succession, jumping the red lights on the wrong side of the road. If I hadn’t looked left as well as right, I would probably be in hospital.

This is a familiar feeling. In west Kent, where I co-ordinate a local cycle forum and lobby local government for better facilities, I’m part of a tiny minority which defies the prevailing car culture and gets around by bike whenever possible. When I visit London I’m a pedestrian and bus passenger.

I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve seen cyclists crashing the red lights and ploughing into a crowd of pedestrians as I leave Charing Cross, Waterloo and London Bridge stations in the evening rush hour. A decade ago, the only riders who did this were professional cycle couriers.

Now it’s common behaviour among bike commuters. Otherwise law-abiding Londoners seem blissfully unaware that crashing a red light is not just dangerous but illegal. Others know well what the law says but just ignore it. Too many riders – and commenters on the Guardian’s discussion threads – think protecting their own safety at the expense of pedestrians is okay.

Of course, I’m familiar with the "only a few bad apples" argument. That’s the Metropolitan police’s standard excuse when one of its own breaks the law. But it’s a symptom of something wider. And this month’s debate over cycling deaths has persuaded me that London’s cycling culture is developing in a dangerous direction.

The capital’s cycling campaigners seem to be outraged by suggestions that cyclists should start taking more responsibility for their safety on the roads. I’m no fan of Boris Johnson or of the Met, but I’m tired of hearing the mindless phrase "blaming the victim" when they remind cyclists about respecting the law and the highway code.

The law is one of the few protections that vulnerable road users have. It makes no sense to pretend it doesn’t apply to cyclists. Cycling without front and rear lights is illegal after dark, but there are thousands of Londoners who do it every day. And it’s not ‘blaming the victim’ to suggest that cyclists wear hi-vis clothing after dark to ensure drivers can see them at a distance. It’s just common sense.

I’m quite happy to believe police evidence that in two out of three crashes involving cyclists, the vehicles are at fault. But let’s tackle the remaining third as well. The problem is that the explosion of anger over cycling deaths means common sense is now in short supply. Bloggers such as Matt Glass and prominent tweeter Mark Treasure seem to live in a world where no cyclist can ever make a mistake. While correctly pointing out the flaws in London’s cycle infrastructure and calling for HGVs to be banned, they pour scorn on the idea that cyclists can or should do anything to lower risk.

The London Cycling Campaign is no better. Its website reminds cyclists to check their tyre pressures and brakes but doesn't give enough prominence to basic safety measures. What upsets me is that the experienced cyclists who reject safety advice won’t be the ones who will be crushed by the next lorry. It’s the inexperienced riders who take their advice but haven’t developed the same road sense.

Of course, it’s much easier to blame Boris Johnson for everything and call for London to "go Dutch" with segregated infrastructure everywhere, preferably by next week. But Boris has made the sensible point that this would require not just better infrastructure but a change in London’s cycling culture. In other words, don’t treat the daily commute between Putney and the City as a Bradley Wiggins time trial where you are seeking a new personal best. Remember that in wet conditions your stopping distance will be much longer than that of a car.

The other thing which London cyclists should remember that their city is planning nearly £1bn worth of cycling infrastructure over the next decade. Outside London, particularly in Kent, where no councillor or traffic engineer would ever dream of inconveniencing a single motorist for the sake of cyclists or pedestrians, that level of spending is simply inconceivable. Our uphill struggle to build a consensus for cycling outside the capital is being made daily more difficult by the behaviour of some London cyclists, and by the abusive tone of London’s cycling debate.

• This article was corrected on 22 November to correct a sentence that wrongly said the LCC does not have advice about front and rear lights or hi-vis clothing; the LCC site does feature such advice.