The brilliant folks at Funny or Die have just released a new Bathroom Police training video in response to North Carolina’s transphobic bathroom bill signed into law by Gov. Pat McCrory back in March.

Related: So North Carolina Just Became The Most Homophobic State In The Nation

Officer Tammy Cox of the Bathroom Police shares with people the dos and don’ts when it comes to ensuring the safety of public restrooms (a.k.a. “porcelain sanctuaries”) everywhere — including how to conduct “visual scans of suspicious genitals,” how to “sniff out illegal ding dongs,” and how to listen to people’s streams through the stalls.

Check out the video below.