Remember when handfuls of annoying, virtue-signaling Hollywood elites vowed to leave this beautiful country if Republican Donald Trump won on November 8? Well my friends, that day has come, and they are still not gone.

Out of courtesy to Katy Perry, Lena Dunham and company, I feel as though we (lowly, sexist, racist, homophobic peasants who voted for "literally Hitler") would be remiss if we did not remind and lovingly encourage such folks to fulfill their promise to leave. After all, a lot of us got our hopes up.

Please sign this petition to help persuade the following celebrities to honor their pledge, pack up and exit stage left:

1. Lena Dunham

2. Miley Cyrus

3. Amy Schumer

4. Cher

5. Chelsea Handler

6. George Lopez

7. Jon Stewart

8. Barbra Streisand

9. Whoopi Goldberg

10. Raven-Symone

11. Keegan-Michael Key

12. Ne-Yo

13. Bryan Cranston

14. Samuel L. Jackson

I hear Mexico is lovely this time of year.

Raise awareness by signing and passing on! I thank you, and America thanks you. And probably God.