Having Troubles Keeping Your Conversations Alive?

Here’s A Simple Method For Longer Lasting And More Intimate Conversations.

Most of us encounter a common situation in our everyday lives where we meet a new group of people but don’t know how to start a conversation and keep it going is.

This situation is so uncomfortable that it can even force you to avoid meeting new people in the first place, but there is a way to get around it. The problem isn’t that we are afraid to approach someone, but we hesitate to do so because we are unsure what to do after we say hello.

Not knowing how to keep a conversation going can harm your social life.

But if you know how to keep those words flowing, you can meet, talk to, and get to know pretty much anyone you like — creating great possibilities for friendship, fun and shared activities that you would otherwise have missed out on.

Many techniques to keep conversation going that I have read online are usually too lengthy and vague, so here’s an easy to remember method to to keep things in a conversation smooth and interesting.

This is known as the FORD method which represents Family, Occupation, Recreational, and Dreams.

Every time you run out of things to talk about or ask, you should think of this method and converse using these four branches. Here’s how you should properly use each topic:

Family

Open up about your family first,

and then question the mark about their family. Never ask about the mark’s family first or it will come off as creepy and alarming. Always make sure to then have a smooth transaction to the next story or topic, do not end things abruptly.

Assumptions

when conversing about family is extremely useful. If you would ask a question to the likes of “I think you look like someone who has an older sister”, it causes listener to be curious why you would think so and then they would have to agree or disagree. This provides more room for back-and-forth talking.

Occupation

Almost all of us have either been to school and/or work so that provides a source of pretty interesting stories to talk about.

However, here are some very important things to avoid doing when talking about your occupation which many make the mistake of doing so.

Do not ask surface level questions. Do not go into interview mode. It makes the conversation extremely boring and one-sided. Always add a comment or opinion before asking another question.

Recreational

“What do you like to do?”

is a very broad question and allows the mark to talk freely and express about their favorite hobbies and pastimes. However do not just stop at there.

Ask yourself why is that activity so exciting for him/her? Try to relate to the other person’s interests and hobbies and talk/comment about that instead. This makes the person feel like they’re listened to, allowing the person to explain more and dive deeper into the conversation.

Dreams

Now this is the deal breaker.

If you manage to converse about the previous topics before and form a chemistry or bond with the mark, then you are able to dive into this. If up till now you can’t keep the conversation going, you won’t be able to get the mark to talk about their dreams as this topic is the hardest to get people to start talking about.

From talking previously about their recreational activities, pinpoint what you think their dreams and aspirations are. For example, if they like to draw, ask the mark if they would love to be an artist.

Here are two important keys to remember when conversing about dreams:

1. Always support their dreams.

Do not go against their dreams or aspirations or the mark will feel attacked, and then closed up, which leads to them no longer wanting to share more.

2. Talk about the bigger picture.

Just like the Occupation branch, do not keep asking surface level questions. If you do, the conversation will not last long at all as it loses meaning and the mark will not remember it in the future. Think big.

Conclusion

I hope after learning about the FORD method, it really would help you to make more meaningful and intimate conversations with those you want to get to know better and get closer to. Whenever you find yourself in an awkward situation and don’t know how to keep a conversation going after it’s started, try and remember what you’ve read and learnt here.

Good luck out there! :)