ima-fuckingt4ble:

babycrawlingveryfast:

really disturbs me how many men I encounter that say they rarely if ever cry. when I ask them when’s the last time they cried they have to think hard about it for a minute before coming back with some answer like “at my grandmas funeral 5 years ago”. no offense but what the fuck? the only conclusion I can draw is that men are emotionally castrated and experience life to a narrower degree than does the average woman

Have you considered that men are different to women and are not just broken versions of women? I recommend watching Tom Golden interviews and buying his book The Way Men Heal. It shows how when, for example, women cry or talk to get over things, men sometimes start projects to honour their loved one who has died. He has also written a book for mothers on how to connect with sons and help their sons grow into emotionally healthy men.

The idea that men are emotionally castrated is really damaging because you are basically telling men that they’re expressing their emotions wrong. Not everyone cries when they are upset. Also, men have different tear ducts so its physically harder for them to cry.

So a man and a woman could be equally upset but the woman would cry more easily.

http://nymag.com/scienceofus/2015/01/why-do-women-cry-more-than-men.html



Please take this response seriously because Tom Golden’s work really helped me connect to the men around me. When I heard what he said I asked the men in my lives and they said that he was right. Its so much easier to understand men when you understand their way of healing is not wrong, its just different. Men don’t have to cry to prove they are feeling.

I hope this helped, its important to try to connect to those close to you even if they deal with problems differently to you. xo