Hey how ’bout them real world events ‘n whatnot? Things happenin’, here ‘n there, ‘n also in that other place? An’ no shortage o’ people ready ‘n willin’ to tell ya ’bout it either. S’enough to drive you mad if ya don’t look away every now ‘n then. Well fear not! I’m here to help. Gaze upon this go-gettin’ chap ‘n his cunnin’ rise to greatness. You’ll thank me later. Or not. They’re both fine options.