The Drug Enforcement Administration doesn't have the greatest reputation. Either they're forcing doctors to pay $700 for a DEA license in order to be able to prescribe drugs, or they're inexplicably hostile shitheads trying to keep John Cusack from helping Nicolas Cage safely land a plane full of convicts so he can make it home to see his daughter. But regardless of how you feel about the war on drugs, it's pretty clear how they earned this reputation -- the DEA is one of the most bugshit crazy law enforcement agencies on the planet. Just within the past decade, the DEA has racked up a list of exploits that reads like the daily planner of a caricature of an insane police officer, including ...

6 Taking Cartel Bribes (In The Form Of Sex Parties)

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If popular culture has taught us anything, it's that doling out bribes to law enforcement officials is an everyday part of being a criminal. The trick, however, is finding the right bribe for the right cop. Where the DEA is concerned, the right bribe is apparently a truck full of prostitutes.

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According to a recently released report by the Department Of Justice, DEA agents stationed in Colombia would regularly meet with drug cartel leaders to discuss crucial issues, such as recent Academy Award snubs and the details of ongoing DEA investigations, including "how bad things looked for the [cartel] boss in the United States, how much paper did they have on him, and ... how much money and [how many smuggling] routes had to be handed over to get a favorable deal," according to one source. The cartel leaders would routinely bring along prostitutes, who would then accompany the agents to a bedroom to "smuggle some packages" after the information exchange.

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"This is way better than those melted Orange Juliuses they keep bribing my mall cop buddies with."

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This arrangement continued for several years, with many of the parties being held in houses paid for by the federal government, during which lead agents would receive (in addition to the bankrolled sex workers) gifts of cash and even freaking weapons. The agents involved later tried to defend their actions by arguing that they didn't know that the women were prostitutes. They just figured the women were super into DEA agents (Note: This has never happened).