Former intern says she suffered from PTSD after relationship and praises #MeToo movement

The former White House intern Monica Lewinsky has said the affair that led to impeachment proceedings against Bill Clinton was not sexual assault, but “constituted a gross abuse of power”.

Writing in the March issue of Vanity Fair, Lewinsky also said she was in awe of the sheer courage of women who have been confronting entrenched beliefs and institutions.

She said she had recently been moved to tears when a leader of the #MeToo movement told her: “I’m so sorry you were so alone.”

Lewinsky said she had been diagnosed with post-traumatic stress as a result of being “publicly outed and ostracised”, and lauded the #MeToo movement for providing “the safety that comes from solidarity”. “There are many more women and men whose voices and stories need to be heard before mine,” she wrote.

“There are even some people who feel my White House experiences don’t have a place in this movement, as what transpired between Bill Clinton and myself was not sexual assault, although we now recognise that it constituted a gross abuse of power.”

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The former US president initially denied the affair before admitting to it in 1998. His representative did not immediately respond to a request for comment on Tuesday.

“Now, at 44, I’m beginning … to consider the implications of the power differentials that were so vast between a president and a White House intern,” Lewinsky said.

“I’m beginning to entertain the notion that in such a circumstance the idea of consent might well be rendered moot, although power imbalances – and the ability to abuse them – do exist even when the sex has been consensual,” she wrote.

“But it’s … very, very complicated. The dictionary definition of ‘consent’? ‘To give permission for something to happen.’ And yet what did the ‘something’ mean in this instance, given the power dynamics, his position, and my age? Was the ‘something’ just about crossing a line of sexual [and later emotional] intimacy? An intimacy I wanted – with a 22-year-old’s limited understanding of the consequences.

“He was my boss. He was the most powerful man on the planet. He was 27 years my senior, with enough life experience to know better. He was, at the time, at the pinnacle of his career, while I was in my first job out of college,” she said.

Lewinsky added that “none of the above excuses me for my responsibility for what happened. I meet regret every day.”