NEW YORK CITY, NY – The Polo/Ralph Lauren company issued a recall this morning on the red, white and blue polos worn by the US Ryder Cup team during their record meltdown on Sunday at Medinah. “Regrettably we must remove these products from the marketplace immediately as they pose an extreme choking hazard,” said Ellen Maguire of Polo Ralph Lauren. “We have yet to understand why the wearers of these shirts are so prone to choking, but we are taking a closer look at the collar of the shirt and will publicly release any findings.”

Sadly this recall comes one day too late for the hapless US team, which suffered from light-headedness, difficulty breathing and blurred vision during the final day of the Ryder Cup. “I actually thought my first putt was heading straight for the middle of the cup,” said Steve Stricker of his potential Ryder Cup saving putt on 18. “I was about to fist-pump, when suddenly the ball rolled right over the top of what I thought was the hole and kept on going. Turns out my blurred vision had me seeing another hole 8 feet left of where the real hole was.”

“I was really having a hard time focusing out there,” said Bubba Watson. “Apparently at one point when I thought I was getting a grandstand full of people pumped up, Luke Donald told me I was actually just waving my arms around wildly at a bunch of trees. That’s almost as embarrassing as the way the US team played out there, almost.”