So, here’s what we need to do:

Change your mindset

If you’ve decided to stay, even for a little while, you’ve got to change your mindset.

If you keep thinking the place is “toxic”, it’s going to smell like the “death” valley every time you walk in it.

So, pretend that your brand “new job” is a brand “new baby”. Smell the new baby smell with your entire chest puffed up. Try the “Ujjayi Breath”. Cuddle with the new baby. Lean into that “sweet bundle of joy”. Pretend the new baby does not know how to cry.

Now, do you see that everyone’s sane and competent? Good.

Remember: only deal with the lunatics when they act like lunatics.

Set an example

If you are the only sane person around, act sane. Do not let the lunacy get to you under any circumstances. Be a buddha. Learn to nod and say “I hear you.”Better yet try: “I will get back to you.” “Let’s talk about this tomorrow.” “Let me think it over.”

Delay, defer and help everyone cool down.

Show your team what mediation looks like. Slowly, usher your team forward with a healthy dose of zen.

You can do it. Remember, you’ve got grit.

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Forge your own path

Ask for a new project. You’ve got year end reviews to worry about. You have to have some control over your career. You need a project that does not involve dealing with lunatics and having no control. Tell your boss that this one is the cherry on top of the ice cream cone. At year end, if all else fail, you can butter up that ice cream cone with real sprinkles and chocolate syrup to serve to your management as evidence of your competency.

You can do it. Remember, you’ve got grit.

Set boundaries

The only way to deal with wolves and narcissists is by setting strong boundaries. Build your boundaries with steel. Fix up your boundaries with bulb wires. Add electric shocks to your fencing.

Do not budge!

Treat people by how they treat you

As you show people respect, the sane people will start to show you respect as well. You can thank those sane people and appreciate them with gratitude. You ask those people to be your “team”. You can strengthen your bond with new projects.

Toxic people will always be toxic. You can’t change them.

If wolves want to act like wolves, buy some sheeps. Lock the wolves away with those sheeps.

If your narcissistic boss just won’t back off, speed dial one level higher. You’ve got to show upper management that this person needs to go. At the same time, smile and suck it up for your narcissistic boss. He or she is still your boss.

You can do it. Remember, you’ve got grit.

If subordinates don’t want to work and you can’t hire new ones, try to look for the rotten apple. There’s usually one that’s rotting the whole basket. Carve out money for a new project and get that rotten apple on it. Soon enough, the rotten apple will show its true colors. Then, you remove the apple with care.

You can do it. Remember, you’ve got grit.

Negotiate for new hires

You can’t negotiate for new hires unless you’ve got a new project. So, think long and hard.

Create a project that will bring “real money” into your department. Remember “real money” does not have to be client money. It could be “cost savings”. Use your internal connections to make this “new project” happen. Once you’ve got the skeleton down, you can request funding to hire a new person to be in charge of this “new project”. You integrate that person into your current team. You make sure this new person’s got the “right attitude”. You motivate that new person to lift the spirit of your entire team.