I am not a rapist. But I’m in my second week as a university student, and already modern feminism and “consent culture” is trying to pin that label on me.

The University of Warwick Student’s Union has set up classes called “I Heart Consent,” apparently aimed at teaching young people about how to get it on without accidentally raping their partner. I say people, but what I mean is men, because as all of today’s mainstream leftist ideologues know, men cannot be raped by women. When women do it, it’s called “non-consensual sex.”

George Lawlor, a reporter for The Tab Warwick, has been first to publicly rebel against these finger-wagging tutorials. Now I must add my name to what I am sure is a growing list of understandably aggrieved young men. These classes are useless, and may even be damaging.

How many rapists are going to stop raping people because some pretentious student told them that “Yes means Yes”? Any at all? And why would any normal, right-thinking man attend a class that demonises them and normal, healthy male sexuality by pretending that all men are latent rapists who would take advantage of women if they thought they could get away with it?

Consent classes aren’t compulsory — yet — but it is heavily implied that attending them would be A Good Idea. At the Sports Fair last Tuesday, I saw stickers on one stand advertising them. I can’t be the only person to see a bit of irony in the coercion and social pressure attached to signing up for consent lectures.

Anyway, I’m not going. I think we all know what goes down at these things anyway, don’t we? The male students will be bombarded with stats about “1 in 4 women,” bogus and offensive conspiracy theories about “toxic masculinity,” and suggestions that yes, all men are potential rapists.

Well, I’m sorry, but in case you didn’t know, pre-crime is sci-fi. Having a penis does not make me a rapist. In fact, the highest volume of domestic violence and sexual abuse is found in lesbian couples – you know, the ones that don’t actually involve men.

This new obsession with affirmative, ongoing consent perpetuated by wacky third-wave feminists is scaring a whole generation of young men — myself included, if I’m being honest. Even before arriving at university, I was terrified of being falsely accused of rape.

I had never been as comfortable around girls as some of my friends, and I imagined going to university surrounded by them would allow me to improve my conversation skills and maybe even find somebody who might want to be more than friends with me. But it’s too risky now.

Unless I actively know the other partner’s idea of consent and destroy any hint of excitement or romance by effectively (and I joke but this can’t be far off) getting them to sign a form between thrusts, how can I start anything with anyone? So here we are. No one-night stands or innocent smooching in a dark corner of the SU for me.

It’s just not worth the risk of jail time, expulsion, and a permanent blot on my life because some batty, vindictive, or remorseful person decides the next day that maybe she wasn’t really into it after all. It’s amazing to me that universities aren’t just tolerating but actively supporting this state of affairs in their codes of conduct.

There’s no such thing as “rape culture,” but there is a crime being committed on university campuses across Europe and America. It’s the demonisation of men and the pernicious spread of consent classes, the underlying suggestion of them being that men are dangerous sex pests and have to be “taught not to be rapists.” Men — and women — deserve better.

Jack Hadfield is a student at Warwick University and co-founder of libertarian blog The Squid Magazine. He tweets at @ToryBastard_.