This is the Ninja Gnome garden gnome available from Firebox ($30). He has a solar panel in the back of his head that powers his glowing eyes when night falls. If night RISES? Hopefully it's a sign the world is going to end soon. The Ninja Gnome was designed to protect your garden from any would-be intruders, but I suspect he will fail at his job and, at least in my neighborhood, get himself kidnapped. Now that's a pretty shitty ninja. Possibly even the worst ninja. "Trust me, it's Donatello." Ahahahhahaha, Michelangelo, ladies and gentlemen!

Keep going for one more shot in case you weren't sure what that solar panel in the back of his head might look like.

Thanks to DitchingClass, who's probably gonna have to ask a classmate for tonight's homework assignment.