Main Forum Container minimized. Expand Tweet Page of 8 XCOM2 Sitrep 74 replies PopeUrban First of His Name Posts: 434 Votes: +37 LEVEL 0 First of His Name The Unconcerned Chronicler of Deeds Deacon of the Desert Commander of Pigs Pirate of the Tahyang Sea Keeper of the Flames Breaker of Spam Master of Dungeons Supreme Administrator Officer FOEX Member Donor Spoiler: Audio Show

Network Analysis Complete.



Routing..........



Warning Advent Counterintelligence Probe Found!



Deploying SHIV 0045 at primary infojunction.



SHIV 0045 Detected Hostiles.



SHIV 0045 Taking fire!



Detonate SHIV 0045?



Y



Detonating.....



Counterintelligence probe neutralized.



Routing Complete.



Accessing Advent Criminal Interest Records.......



Records compromised. Logging in.



Scanning for persons of interest.................................................



Scanning in progress. ETA 48 hours.



Stand by. Posted Feb 3, 16 · OP · Last edited Feb 6, 16 PopeUrban First of His Name Posts: 434 Votes: +37 LEVEL 0 First of His Name The Unconcerned Chronicler of Deeds Deacon of the Desert Commander of Pigs Pirate of the Tahyang Sea Keeper of the Flames Breaker of Spam Master of Dungeons Supreme Administrator Officer FOEX Member Donor Gremlin SHYAMALAN systems check...........

Mobility systems................................Online

Stealth systems........................

Warning Error in Stealth Core, Catastrophic failure imminent!

Reboot Stealth Core?

Y

Rebooting Stealth Core......................

Stealth Systems.............................................................................Online

Recording systems..........................................Online



SHYAMALAN Online!

Recording all mission data!

Raw footage collection commencing! Posted Feb 4, 16 · OP · Last edited Feb 4, 16 PopeUrban First of His Name Posts: 434 Votes: +37 LEVEL 0 First of His Name The Unconcerned Chronicler of Deeds Deacon of the Desert Commander of Pigs Pirate of the Tahyang Sea Keeper of the Flames Breaker of Spam Master of Dungeons Supreme Administrator Officer FOEX Member Donor Persons of Interest Scanned!

Filtering term "XCOM"...........................

Filtering term "Flames of Exile"....................

Downloading Dossiers............

Images Ready!

CLICK TO VIEW GALLERY Posted Feb 5, 16 · OP PopeUrban First of His Name Posts: 434 Votes: +37 LEVEL 0 First of His Name The Unconcerned Chronicler of Deeds Deacon of the Desert Commander of Pigs Pirate of the Tahyang Sea Keeper of the Flames Breaker of Spam Master of Dungeons Supreme Administrator Officer FOEX Member Donor SIMULATION COMMENCING



Simulation Log 001:



After successfully busting Commander Urban out of alien pod-jail and digging a thingy out of his head, Central decides its a good idea to just thrust the poor guy who has just been through invasive brain surgery in to a command chair.



Apparently, our base, the Avenger, is out of batteries so we need to send some fine XCOM rookies out to retrieve it. As luck would have it, one of XCOM's finest, eager to get the damn thing off the ground decides she's sick of sitting around an volunteers for the mission. (No, really, they just said "here's your 4 soldiers. No you can't pick them.")







So Del and three other meatheads go steal some batteries from some advent train station. She manages to light up a whole bunch of bad dudes, and we bring the batteries back and power the thing up. She also decides that batteries are fascinating and becomes a specialist.







She's pretty damn happy with herself.







Not to be deterred in his quest to give the Commander absolutely zero recovery time from the aformentioned brain surgery and alien pod induced decades of muscle atrophy, Central decides its time to go steal some warez or something from an advent base for this scientist lady.



So we fly the Avenger somewhere in Canada, Del decides to swap out her armor for a snazzy Tshirt because fucking awesome robot shield and Jimmee jumps on board because he's convinced the aliens are hiding Half Life 3 or something in their secret computer base.







Everything starts out pretty well with a baller security system hack and rooftop ambush, but then some civilians run off and call in the authorities. By Authorities I mean a dropship full of Advent troopers and two of these guys:







So they decide to shoot up Jimee and one of the grunts, and del decides to show off with her robot shield. The grunt lives, and so does Jimmee. Del patches him up with one of the new Aerosol bandaid thingies we built, and Jimmee goes on to kick all manner of alien ass.



Since he does a pretty good job countering alien mind control with good old fashioned American bullets, but is really shitty at not getting shot, someone hands him a sniper rifle so he can bust alien domes from on top of rooftops and ice cream trucks and shit.







Everybody is pretty fucked up except the one grunt sniper from the first mission so they all decide to take a bunch of painkillers on the Skyranger and just go to bed when they get back.







The squad makes it back in rough shape, but Del's constant showboating earns her a promotion.



Delorin Desarin. Choose your destiny!

Does your pet robot HEAL or HURT people? Simulation Log 001:After successfully busting Commander Urban out of alien pod-jail and digging a thingy out of his head, Central decides its a good idea to just thrust the poor guy who has just been through invasive brain surgery in to a command chair.Apparently, our base, the Avenger, is out of batteries so we need to send some fine XCOM rookies out to retrieve it. As luck would have it, one of XCOM's finest, eager to get the damn thing off the ground decides she's sick of sitting around an volunteers for the mission. (No, really, they just said "here's your 4 soldiers. No you can't pick them.")So Del and three other meatheads go steal some batteries from some advent train station. She manages to light up a whole bunch of bad dudes, and we bring the batteries back and power the thing up. She also decides that batteries are fascinating and becomes a specialist.She's pretty damn happy with herself.Not to be deterred in his quest to give the Commander absolutely zero recovery time from the aformentioned brain surgery and alien pod induced decades of muscle atrophy, Central decides its time to go steal some warez or something from an advent base for this scientist lady.So we fly the Avenger somewhere in Canada, Del decides to swap out her armor for a snazzy Tshirt becauseand Jimmee jumps on board because he's convinced the aliens are hiding Half Life 3 or something in their secret computer base.Everything starts out pretty well with a baller security system hack and rooftop ambush, but then some civilians run off and call in the authorities. By Authorities I mean a dropship full of Advent troopers and two of these guys:So they decide to shoot up Jimee and one of the grunts, and del decides to show off with her robot shield. The grunt lives, and so does Jimmee. Del patches him up with one of the new Aerosol bandaid thingies we built, and Jimmee goes on to kick all manner of alien ass.Since he does a pretty good job countering alien mind control with good old fashioned American bullets, but is really shitty at not getting shot, someone hands him a sniper rifle so he can bust alien domes from on top of rooftops and ice cream trucks and shit.Everybody is pretty fucked up except the one grunt sniper from the first mission so they all decide to take a bunch of painkillers on the Skyranger and just go to bed when they get back.The squad makes it back in rough shape, but Del's constant showboating earns her a promotion. Posted Feb 6, 16 · OP · Last edited May 30, 16 PopeUrban First of His Name Posts: 434 Votes: +37 LEVEL 0 First of His Name The Unconcerned Chronicler of Deeds Deacon of the Desert Commander of Pigs Pirate of the Tahyang Sea Keeper of the Flames Breaker of Spam Master of Dungeons Supreme Administrator Officer FOEX Member Donor



We get a phone call from the dude from the Hitman games, and he tells us the Advent have been taking people to some secret base and that we should, like, stop them, and that we need to contact local resistance fighters in Canada to help us figure out where the place is.



We take it under consideration, but the Commander decides he's had enough of this shit, and we fly the Avenger south a bit to make scans and let everybody recover a bit from their sucking chest wounds/alien brain trauma. Taigan (he's the boss scientist) finishes researching how to take armored tank tops off of Advent corpses and put them on human pre-corpses. He also figures out the Advent's complex happy meal box like modular weapon system and we clip some of the shit we found in the last couple missions on to some guns.



After about a week we get a call from Hitman again who tells us Kirika lost the keys to her private jet and needs to be picked up from some rooftop somewhere. The commander asks her if she has any gas money but she says she spent it all on labcoats, and asks if it's cool if she pays us in science in stead. Since it took like a week to figure out the mysteries of alien tank tops and how to put a scope on a fucking gun, the Commander figures we need some more science and has Central round up some fresh troops to go pick her up.



After a little searching around behind the bar, we manage to bribe Wolfeman and Xaylann with a couple cases of beer to go run the extraction, and we hook them up with some new scoped rifles. That crazy haired Russian chick from the last mission shows up to tell us that we're actually in Siberia and not Canada, so the Commander revokes her leave and puts her on the op too, along with that awesome Korean sniper.



It's not about what's right and wrong. It's about respect.







The skyranger must have clipped some power lines or something because the Advent knows what's up as soon as we touch down, and we have to dust a couple more sectoids and their cronies. Russian chick takes a much deserved leg shot, but otherwise everything goes pretty good. Xay gets to shoot an alien and then blows it up with a grenade.







We're kinda worried that it'll collapse the LZ, but apparently the Advent build their buildings with the same advanced alien structural techniques as their weapon mods, and we all climb up the now 3 walled building to rope out to the Sky Ranger before the Sky police show up and write it a parking ticket in the form of high yield plasma bolts.



SIMULATION LOG 002:We get a phone call from the dude from the Hitman games, and he tells us the Advent have been taking people to some secret base and that we should, like, stop them, and that we need to contact local resistance fighters in Canada to help us figure out where the place is.We take it under consideration, but the Commander decides he's had enough of this shit, and we fly the Avenger south a bit to make scans and let everybody recover a bit from their sucking chest wounds/alien brain trauma. Taigan (he's the boss scientist) finishes researching how to take armored tank tops off of Advent corpses and put them on human pre-corpses. He also figures out the Advent's complex happy meal box like modular weapon system and we clip some of the shit we found in the last couple missions on to some guns.After about a week we get a call from Hitman again who tells us Kirika lost the keys to her private jet and needs to be picked up from some rooftop somewhere. The commander asks her if she has any gas money but she says she spent it all on labcoats, and asks if it's cool if she pays us in science in stead. Since it took like a week to figure out the mysteries of alien tank tops and how to put a scope on a fucking gun, the Commander figures we need some more science and has Central round up some fresh troops to go pick her up.After a little searching around behind the bar, we manage to bribe Wolfeman and Xaylann with a couple cases of beer to go run the extraction, and we hook them up with some new scoped rifles. That crazy haired Russian chick from the last mission shows up to tell us that we're actually in Siberia and not Canada, so the Commander revokes her leave and puts her on the op too, along with that awesome Korean sniper.It's not about what's right and wrong. It's about respect.The skyranger must have clipped some power lines or something because the Advent knows what's up as soon as we touch down, and we have to dust a couple more sectoids and their cronies. Russian chick takes a much deserved leg shot, but otherwise everything goes pretty good. Xay gets to shoot an alien and then blows it up with a grenade.We're kinda worried that it'll collapse the LZ, but apparently the Advent build their buildings with the same advanced alien structural techniques as their weapon mods, and we all climb up the now 3 walled building to rope out to the Sky Ranger before the Sky police show up and write it a parking ticket in the form of high yield plasma bolts. Posted Feb 6, 16 · OP · Last edited Feb 6, 16 PopeUrban First of His Name Posts: 434 Votes: +37 LEVEL 0 First of His Name The Unconcerned Chronicler of Deeds Deacon of the Desert Commander of Pigs Pirate of the Tahyang Sea Keeper of the Flames Breaker of Spam Master of Dungeons Supreme Administrator Officer FOEX Member Donor







Wolfe is so impressed with all the holo-screens and future-segways in the big city that he decides to join Delorin's robot club.







Kirika decides that it's probably safer to do science on the Avenger than wherever the fuck she's been for the last 20 years, so she signs on permanently to help Taigan unravel the mysteries of obviously binary tab and slot component architecture.







Xay makes a beeline straight back to the bar to brag to the other troops about how nobody missed a shot the whole mission with the Russian, and nobody bothers to remind him it's easy to get a perfect accuracy rating when your chosen implement of alien killing is dropping the side of a fucking building on them.







Xay decides he likes blowing shit up so much he wants to do it for a living, so we give him a grenade launcher. We also give him a minigun because he might run out of grenades at some point.Wolfe is so impressed with all the holo-screens and future-segways in the big city that he decides to join Delorin's robot club.Kirika decides that it's probably safer to do science on the Avenger than wherever the fuck she's been for the last 20 years, so she signs on permanently to help Taigan unravel the mysteries of obviously binary tab and slot component architecture.Xay makes a beeline straight back to the bar to brag to the other troops about how nobody missed a shot the whole mission with the Russian, and nobody bothers to remind him it's easy to get a perfect accuracy rating when your chosen implement of alien killing is dropping the side of a fucking building on them. Posted Feb 6, 16 · OP · Last edited Feb 6, 16 PopeUrban First of His Name Posts: 434 Votes: +37 LEVEL 0 First of His Name The Unconcerned Chronicler of Deeds Deacon of the Desert Commander of Pigs Pirate of the Tahyang Sea Keeper of the Flames Breaker of Spam Master of Dungeons Supreme Administrator Officer FOEX Member Donor



Taigan finished poking around in one of the Advent officers we killed and figured out the thingy he dug out of the Commander's head was some kinda alien psychic wi-fi hub or something. Taigan and Central figure that its our best plan to jump through a bunch of building and research hoops so we can build some kinda techno-spike to stab one of these guys in the head to hack in to their psychic network.



The Commander thinks its a stupid fucking plan, and puts it off until later. He decides to run some more scans to find a couple more soldiers since most of the ones we have already are what optimists would call "half full" of their own blood. He puts Taigan on important cell phone research so we can set up our own prepaid carrier network call all our homies in the resistance.



We finish the scans and find a couple more Flame of Exile dudes squatting in an abandoned Chinese Nike warehouse, Including the Commander's girlfriend, so we pick them up and fly back to HQ and pass out some fly ass 2018 Jordans.



















No sooner do we get back than Evil Christian Bale from The Machinist decides to facetime everybody some footage of Advent torching a resistance camp somewhere, so we bag up the Jordans and fly the Avenger over to keep them from destroying all those super important Russian hovels and civilans.







Thanks for the tip assholes.



The Commander decides to send in the big guns, so Xay tricks out his minigun, and we send him, Wolfe, Korean Sniper, and one of the other heavies.











Simulation Log 003:Taigan finished poking around in one of the Advent officers we killed and figured out the thingy he dug out of the Commander's head was some kinda alien psychic wi-fi hub or something. Taigan and Central figure that its our best plan to jump through a bunch of building and research hoops so we can build some kinda techno-spike to stab one of these guys in the head to hack in to their psychic network.The Commander thinks its a stupid fucking plan, and puts it off until later. He decides to run some more scans to find a couple more soldiers since most of the ones we have already are what optimists would call "half full" of their own blood. He puts Taigan on important cell phone research so we can set up our own prepaid carrier network call all our homies in the resistance.We finish the scans and find a couple more Flame of Exile dudes squatting in an abandoned Chinese Nike warehouse, Including the Commander's girlfriend, so we pick them up and fly back to HQ and pass out some fly ass 2018 Jordans.No sooner do we get back than Evil Christian Bale from The Machinist decides to facetime everybody some footage of Advent torching a resistance camp somewhere, so we bag up the Jordans and fly the Avenger over to keep them from destroying all those super important Russian hovels and civilans.Thanks for the tip assholes.The Commander decides to send in the big guns, so Xay tricks out his minigun, and we send him, Wolfe, Korean Sniper, and one of the other heavies. Posted Feb 6, 16 · OP · Last edited Feb 6, 16 PopeUrban First of His Name Posts: 434 Votes: +37 LEVEL 0 First of His Name The Unconcerned Chronicler of Deeds Deacon of the Desert Commander of Pigs Pirate of the Tahyang Sea Keeper of the Flames Breaker of Spam Master of Dungeons Supreme Administrator Officer FOEX Member Donor



The squad gets the drop off at the mission site, and Central says there are 13 civilians we need to EVAC. The Commander decides 13 is an unlucky number and tells Central that if we get about half it should be enough to piss off the aliens.



There's a nice ridge overlooking what sounds like the right place on account of all the screaming so we set up the sniper and the boys hop down to check things out.



The second they hop down, a sectoid and one of his advent cronies shows up, so the grunt does his best Xaylann impression and immediately fastballs a frag grenade at it.











This pisses off the aliens something fierce and they execute one of the civilians somewhere else in the camp. The sectoid moves up and gets one of the Sniper's revolver shots for his trouble. He responds with purple alien mind fuckery and she freaks out and hides behind a rock.



Wolfe polishes off the Sectoid and Xay and the grunt move up to deal with the now severely outnumbered Advent dude.











The grunt, being a grunt, whiffs it, and a bunch more advent guys show up, all of which settle in to some pretty nice cover because the sniper is still trippin' and nobody in the squad speaks enough Korean to chill her out. Luckily, Xay is still being Xay so he dusts the Advent guy, reasoning that a minigun is basically just three sniper rifles bolted together.











The grunt wings his last grenade at the new friends, painting the hillside in a fine mist of orange Advent blood, but their officer manages to stay up. Sniper chills out a little, but not enough to finish her off. The aliens execute even more civilians and the leftover officer takes a potshot at Wolfe, who's just minding his own business behind a rock and definately not throwing out robot shields on her closest target. She whiffs it, but in the distance the aliens execute another civvie.







Third time's a charm, and the sniper pops the advent lady so the boys can move up on the civilians.











We bust two of them loose and move up on the third one, who in stead of thanking us for being righteous liberators of mankind TURNS IN TO A TOWERING MONSTROSITY AND FUCKING MURDERS XAYLANN.













The Commander reminds his ground troops that rookies with code names are his close personal friends and that allowing them to be mauled to fucking death by rejected baskin Robbins flavors isn't going to get them far in this organization. The grunt heavy gets the hint and lights it up with his minigun. I guess in Korea they mourn the dead by showing off with pistols despite having a perfectly good sniper rifle in the other fucking hand, because our sniper does exactly that, which would have seemed in really poor taste if it hadn't worked. Mr. Melty-Russian drops, but nothing's going to bring Xay back at this point.













Wolfe grabs his drinking buddy and calls in evac up ahead so we can give him a proper burial.







The aliens shoot some lady we don't know named Emma and pile out of a building to try and take down the rest of the squad.







Wolfe takes down the squishiest one in revenge for his dead homie, and Xay Jr. tries to bum rush the other one, but fucks it up and ends up just pissing it off while the other grunt tries to replicate her pistol trick and fails miserably.











The sectoid doesn't like his odds and decides that in stead of turning Xay Jr. inside out, he's gonna book it around the building and mind control the sniper. Xay Jr puts lots of bullets in him and the only thing he has time to mind control out of the sniper is "Fuck me I'm full of bullets and dead" in heavily accented broken english before it dies and she's back to (relatively) normal.











With the last alien taken care of, we ship out the rest of the civilians, strap Xay to the front of the Skyranger, and head home. The Russians are greatful and promise to provide us with regular shipments of Neosporin and Vodka, and promise to name their bar after Xay.







Once the remaining troops land on the Avenger, we have a short service for Xay, and Central decides to promote the sniper, who for some unknown reason everyone starts calling "Aluminum", to Sergeant. Wolfe decides to mourn his good buddy in the best way he knows how, With a bottle or five of good old fashioned resistance Vodka, and reflect on future life choices.















Looks like 13 really is an unlucky number.





OPERATIVE DECEASED: XAYLANN



WOLFEMAN, CHOOSE YOUR DESTINY

Does your pet robot HEAL or HURT people? SIMULATION LOG 004:The squad gets the drop off at the mission site, and Central says there are 13 civilians we need to EVAC. The Commander decides 13 is an unlucky number and tells Central that if we get about half it should be enough to piss off the aliens.There's a nice ridge overlooking what sounds like the right place on account of all the screaming so we set up the sniper and the boys hop down to check things out.The second they hop down, a sectoid and one of his advent cronies shows up, so the grunt does his best Xaylann impression and immediately fastballs a frag grenade at it.This pisses off the aliens something fierce and they execute one of the civilians somewhere else in the camp. The sectoid moves up and gets one of the Sniper's revolver shots for his trouble. He responds with purple alien mind fuckery and she freaks out and hides behind a rock.Wolfe polishes off the Sectoid and Xay and the grunt move up to deal with the now severely outnumbered Advent dude.The grunt, being a grunt, whiffs it, and a bunch more advent guys show up, all of which settle in to some pretty nice cover because the sniper is still trippin' and nobody in the squad speaks enough Korean to chill her out. Luckily, Xay is still being Xay so he dusts the Advent guy, reasoning that a minigun is basically just three sniper rifles bolted together.The grunt wings his last grenade at the new friends, painting the hillside in a fine mist of orange Advent blood, but their officer manages to stay up. Sniper chills out a little, but not enough to finish her off. The aliens execute even more civilians and the leftover officer takes a potshot at Wolfe, who's just minding his own business behind a rock and definately not throwing out robot shields on her closest target. She whiffs it, but in the distance the aliens execute another civvie.Third time's a charm, and the sniper pops the advent lady so the boys can move up on the civilians.We bust two of them loose and move up on the third one, who in stead of thanking us for being righteous liberators of mankindThe Commander reminds his ground troops that rookies with code names are his close personal friends and that allowing them to be mauled to fucking death by rejected baskin Robbins flavors isn't going to get them far in this organization. The grunt heavy gets the hint and lights it up with his minigun. I guess in Korea they mourn the dead by showing off with pistols despite having a perfectly good sniper rifle in the other fucking hand, because our sniper does exactly that, which would have seemed in really poor taste if it hadn't worked. Mr. Melty-Russian drops, but nothing's going to bring Xay back at this point.Wolfe grabs his drinking buddy and calls in evac up ahead so we can give him a proper burial.The aliens shoot some lady we don't know named Emma and pile out of a building to try and take down the rest of the squad.Wolfe takes down the squishiest one in revenge for his dead homie, and Xay Jr. tries to bum rush the other one, but fucks it up and ends up just pissing it off while the other grunt tries to replicate her pistol trick and fails miserably.The sectoid doesn't like his odds and decides that in stead of turning Xay Jr. inside out, he's gonna book it around the building and mind control the sniper. Xay Jr puts lots of bullets in him and the only thing he has time to mind control out of the sniper is "Fuck me I'm full of bullets and dead" in heavily accented broken english before it dies and she's back to (relatively) normal.With the last alien taken care of, we ship out the rest of the civilians, strap Xay to the front of the Skyranger, and head home. The Russians are greatful and promise to provide us with regular shipments of Neosporin and Vodka, and promise to name their bar after Xay.Once the remaining troops land on the Avenger, we have a short service for Xay, and Central decides to promote the sniper, who for some unknown reason everyone starts calling "Aluminum", to Sergeant. Wolfe decides to mourn his good buddy in the best way he knows how, With a bottle or five of good old fashioned resistance Vodka, and reflect on future life choices.Looks like 13 really is an unlucky number. Posted Feb 7, 16 · OP · Last edited Feb 7, 16 PopeUrban First of His Name Posts: 434 Votes: +37 LEVEL 0 First of His Name The Unconcerned Chronicler of Deeds Deacon of the Desert Commander of Pigs Pirate of the Tahyang Sea Keeper of the Flames Breaker of Spam Master of Dungeons Supreme Administrator Officer FOEX Member Donor



Our new buddies in Russia give us the word that some rough looking dudes have been milling around in the woods, and since Taigan and Kirika still haven't figured out how to jailbreak alien iPhones, the Commander figures we should fly the avenger over and check it out. In the mean time Aluminum and Wolfe get pretty fond of cheating Culteras at cards. The argument gets pretty heated before Central sends them all to their rooms without supper.



Not because they're cheating or getting in fistfights over card games, but because we're running out of what most people would consider supper.







Luckily, Daddy Warbucks facetimes us again and tells us he's sending Penguin and some scientist with a couple cases of ramen and almond milk to a secret drop location. On the way there we get a heads up that the aliens are super pissed at us now because of the whole Russian job and that they're probably gonna start sending the space police after us if we don't blow up an airport or something.







The Commander decides we should swing by and pick up the supplies, then see what we can do about the 5-0. While we scan for the supplies, the scientists finish setting up our friends and family plan, so the Commander puts Taigan to work on Mr. Ben & Jerry's to see if we can figure out how to avoid any more "Xaylann Incidents"







We figure its about time to look in to that Alien abduction factory or whatever before they abduct somebody that knows something important about us, so we leave Penguin and the science dude at resistance HQ and start looking for resistance fighters that might know where the place is.







Taigan finishes his dissection, and discovers a bunch of biology bullshit that isn't useful, but Shen pulls through designs us a sweet hologram so we can turn their ice cream sacs or whatever in to something bad guys want to shoot at in stead of us.



Shen's pretty cool.







Taigan starts hacking up more corpses while Amaranda has a serious talk about boys and bed space on the Avenger with Sparky.



Baldy won't stop calling us, and this time he tells us that, surprisingly, the oppressive alien regime that controls the whole fucking planet has more than one secret facility and they're all working on something called "Avatar" and we should probably look in to it.



Taigan spends like five hours researching how to turn XCOM soldiers in to blue monkeys before someone reminds him that the aliens probably never saw that movie, just like anyone who didn't see it during that one week 3d movies were super cool, while Kirika designs is a scanner that can root out ice cream men. Shen gets right on that shit.







Penguin phones in that he saw some Advent UFO pilots asking for directions nearby, so we put a pin in our scans and book it over to blow up a church before they can use the free wifi there to illegally download Highway to the Danger Zone and go hunting down our shield helicarrier.







The commander gets sick of hearing about how Sparky's an adult now, and how she can make her own decisions, and how she doesn't need her mom looking over her shoulder all the time, and puts the Dara family on the op so they can get some quality bonding time. Xay Jr. and Aluminum decide they still owe the bad guys one and volunteer. Xay Jr grabs Xay's old gear to do the deed and everyone approves.







SIMULATION LOG 005:Our new buddies in Russia give us the word that some rough looking dudes have been milling around in the woods, and since Taigan and Kirika still haven't figured out how to jailbreak alien iPhones, the Commander figures we should fly the avenger over and check it out. In the mean time Aluminum and Wolfe get pretty fond of cheating Culteras at cards. The argument gets pretty heated before Central sends them all to their rooms without supper.Not because they're cheating or getting in fistfights over card games, but because we're running out of what most people would consider supper.Luckily, Daddy Warbucks facetimes us again and tells us he's sending Penguin and some scientist with a couple cases of ramen and almond milk to a secret drop location. On the way there we get a heads up that the aliens are super pissed at us now because of the whole Russian job and that they're probably gonna start sending the space police after us if we don't blow up an airport or something.The Commander decides we should swing by and pick up the supplies, then see what we can do about the 5-0. While we scan for the supplies, the scientists finish setting up our friends and family plan, so the Commander puts Taigan to work on Mr. Ben & Jerry's to see if we can figure out how to avoid any more "Xaylann Incidents"We figure its about time to look in to that Alien abduction factory or whatever before they abduct somebody that knows something important about us, so we leave Penguin and the science dude at resistance HQ and start looking for resistance fighters that might know where the place is.Taigan finishes his dissection, and discovers a bunch of biology bullshit that isn't useful, but Shen pulls through designs us a sweet hologram so we can turn their ice cream sacs or whatever in to something bad guys want to shoot at in stead of us.Shen's pretty cool.Taigan starts hacking up more corpses while Amaranda has a serious talk about boys and bed space on the Avenger with Sparky.Baldy won't stop calling us, and this time he tells us that, surprisingly, the oppressive alien regime that controls the whole fucking planet has more than one secret facility and they're all working on something called "Avatar" and we should probably look in to it.Taigan spends like five hours researching how to turn XCOM soldiers in to blue monkeys before someone reminds him that the aliens probably never saw that movie, just like anyone who didn't see it during that one week 3d movies were super cool, while Kirika designs is a scanner that can root out ice cream men. Shen gets right on that shit.Penguin phones in that he saw some Advent UFO pilots asking for directions nearby, so we put a pin in our scans and book it over to blow up a church before they can use the free wifi there to illegally download Highway to the Danger Zone and go hunting down our shield helicarrier.The commander gets sick of hearing about how Sparky's an adult now, and how she can make her own decisions, and how she doesn't need her mom looking over her shoulder all the time, and puts the Dara family on the op so they can get some quality bonding time. Xay Jr. and Aluminum decide they still owe the bad guys one and volunteer. Xay Jr grabs Xay's old gear to do the deed and everyone approves. Posted Feb 7, 16 · OP Delorin FOEX Officer Posts: 290 Votes: +6 LEVEL 0 Officer FOEX Member Donor Ward Marked One It kills my robot kills. and its name is squishy. Posted Feb 7, 16 Tweet Page of 8 Quick navigation ------------------------------------------------------------------ Public Boards Public Discourse Recruiting