It’s the seven words that haunts relationships everywhere.

“Where do you want to go eat?”

Which is always followed the the biggest lie since social security …

“I don’t care.”

Thus entering the two of you into a high noon standoff feedback loop that proves that they really, truly, do care. Revealing the lieing monster that they really are. It got so bad that we asked people on Instagram where we should go.

And you know what? Y’all did us proud. We got a ton of great recos and 6 that we had never heard of before. Which makes us super excited. And as we get yelled at a ton for not getting out of our bubble, we picked one from KCK that sounded awesome.

But we were not prepared for how awesome it really was.

We chose Slaps BBQ, and our BBQ choices will never be the same.

Slaps BBQ – short for Squeal Like a Pig – is the biggest thing we’ve never heard of. We actually felt pretty dumb. If you look it up, it’s filled with thousands of reviews and ratings. So it’s kind of disheartening that we totally missed the boat on this one.

We got there super early since we’re weird internet people that want to take photos without people judging us, so were lucky to be second in line. Yes, this is a place that has lines before opening and we’ve heard they can sell out of the good stuff.

Walking in, it’s a really small place. We were worried about seating because, while we’re young, we have old people anxiety. Ample seating is important, ok? That is until we saw their full semi-enclosed patio area (WHICH IS HEATED BY OVERHEAD SPACE HEATERS!). Crisis averted. You order up front and the people working there were super nice (we’re looking at you Arthur Bryant’s). I had questions and they didn’t rush us at all. I like them.

I went with the Burnt End Meat Plate, with potato casserole, mac n’cheese and a side order of jalapeno and cheddar sausage. The meat plate comes with two sides. We just added a third because we hate heathy physiques.

Mrs. All the Yums went with “The Sandwich” – Smoked Brisket, topped with two onion rings and creamy Provel cheese with a side of beans.

Let’s talk about the Burnt Ends.

I was not prepared for how good they were. Like … they messed up my BBQ hierarchy and placed me in a place where I had to ask myself some very uncomfortable questions. Is this place better than Joe’s? Have I found my new BBQ place? If God is omniscient then all actions foreknown, thus proving free will to be nothing but an illusion of the mind?

The answers are complicated. These burnt ends are world class. I loved them so much. They EASILY beat out Jack Stacks. That’s a given (I love me some Jack Stack but their burnt ends are trash). They win out on Q39 too. Compared to Joe’s it’s hard. Slaps Burnt Ends are bigger, juicier and more fatty (in a good way). Joe’s though … they have a deeper underlying flavor. Like they get more smoke or seasoning … if that makes sense. But the fact that I’m having a hard time choosing between the two has got to let you know that this place is the real deal. Slaps is coming at me like some dark horse smothered in BBQ sauce.

Short answer – order them and judge for yourself. I loved them so much.

My one point of criticism is The Sandwich. I never thought I would say it but it had WAY too much cheese. All we could taste was the cheese. It completely overpowered the meat. I would not recommend The Sandwich. Especially since their other options are so damn good. It’s a Z Man without the magic. Trust us. Just get the burnt ends.

As for the sides, the potato casserole was super tasty. Creamy, peppery and artery clogging. Will get it again. And the jalapeno cheddar sausage will be in my dreams for a long time. I want it so bad right now (#sentencesIneverthoughtIwouldsay). The sausage casing had a great snap to it and it had just the right amount of heat. The mac n’cheese was ok. Kind of flavorless. I’d like to see some toasted breadcrumbs for texture or more complexity to the cheese blend. The texture was pretty mushy and was in need of a crunch factor. Texture = king with food.

I’m going to say it though. I think Slaps is going to be my new BBQ joint. It was less of a hassle than Joe’s and REALLY close to being as good. I’m super glad we finally came here. If you haven’t, go there now.

And yes, WE DIDN’T GET A BATHROOM PHOTO. Don’t yell at me. We were busy and stuff and I forgot because I’m an amateur. BUT! Reddit friend Philo_T_Farnsworth got us covered with an old photo.

Slaps BBQ

553 Central Ave, Kansas City, KS 66101

Hours: