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I Can't Continue Like This

On Friday, Electra had a seizure while shopping at the mall, and although the situation wasn’t life-threatening, I thought she was dying. While at the hospital, I was thinking a lot about my life, and how much I am wasting of it. I can die at any time. If I lost Electra, that’s it. I do not have any “real life” friends, any social interactions I get aside from Electra are usually from faceless voices coming out of my computer. I’m wasting my time.

I don’t want to be misunderstood, this is not my retirement from YouTube, instead, this is a warning of changes on how I handle YouTube. A feeling that has overtaken my life has been one of dread. Dread that no matter what I do, I will always find a Reddit, 4chan, or Facepunch thread tearing my content, a new ass. Dread that regardless how many hours go into producing a report, there will always be a mistake, which will never be forgotten by those that still use mistakes from 2015 as reasons why I shouldn’t be taken seriously.

That isn’t to say I don’t deserve the criticism, I very much do, I however find myself obsessively reading the complaints, it’s unhealthy. I’m making a change to my content based on feedback, and I’m going to stop caring about the unconstructive feedback. When uploading a “Ketchup” video, I will be titling that video “Valve Ketchup - December 2018”, or “CSNN - December 2018”, no clickbait, no bait thumbnails. The colored speculation system will be used, and the community content reviews will be at the end of videos. With the timely reports, they will be titled based on what the story is, life if the title is a headline on a newspaper, and will very much attempt to avoid any traditional “Clickbait” tactics, such as adjectives, use of punctuation, and over the top thumbnails. I will monitor my growth with consistent, honestly packaged content, and see if anything change.

I am also making changes to my mindset. My goal is to explain everything Valve is doing. This means everything, and since a lot of time is spent on Artifact and VR, I am making many Artifact and VR videos. If you click on these videos, and dislike just because you don’t like the topic, you can unsubscribe. If you comment, “Yea, but I hate Artifact,” leave. I’m done trying to pander to you. I am making the content I want to make, and if you watch each video, you will know everything going on at Valve. I don’t care if the focus on Valve is a waste, I don’t care if VNN doesn’t deserve views. If you want to leave me constructive criticism, my email is tylermcvicker@yahoo.com, and I have a feedback section on my Discord server. I have a finite amount of time to be alive, and I’m not going to waste it any longer on people like you.



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