When did sex become so serious!? Has it always been this way or have we been taught somewhere along our life journey that to have enjoyable sex means we must be done with our playful and innocent spirit?

When we were young, play came so naturally to us. We approached the world with fresh eyes, bringing our curiosity of the unfamiliar into every aspect of our lives. Whether we received good sex education or not, over time many of us were taught that there was a right way of being sexual and anything that did not fit into this narrow framework was to be shamed. This often meant that the adventurous approach we had to other areas of our life did not translate to our sexual explorations.

To think that there are so many people out there who feel ashamed of the things that turn them on saddens me. Human sexuality is vast, with each person unique in what they desire sexually and how they choose to express their sexuality.

Wouldn’t it be so incredibly beautiful to approach our sexuality with a sense of playfulness and willingness to get messy? Exploring our sensuality and sexuality solo or with others is a wildly free, fun and sexy adventure if we choose to make it so. I’ve compiled an alphabetical list of some potentially quirky, kinky or unusual paraphilias and ways that different people can explore their sexuality.

Anal Rimming

I understand for some individuals, licking someone’s bottom is not something they think twice about yet some people could never imagine giving or receiving a tongue in between their ass cheeks.

Bondage

Whether it is with rope, cuffs or tape, being constrained can be extremely sexy and fun.

Cuckolding

Seeing your wife or girlfriend getting fucked by another man turns many men on. Cuckolding is surprisingly one of the most popular porn searches on the internet!

Dogging

Unless you count being bent over the bonnet of a car whilst someone fucks you doggie style, this has less to do with canines and more to do with being watched in a public space having sex.

Electrostimulation

For many people, being zapped by electricity sounds like a nightmare yet for a select few, electrostimulation proves to be an exhilarating and enjoyable sexual kink

Foot Fetish

There are some people that find the look, smell, touch and taste of feet incredibly arousing. Whatever floats your boat I say!!

Gerontophilia

This describes the primary sexual attraction to elderly people. I stress primary because those with this paraphilia can only be turned on from being with an elderly person.

Humiliation

Some people become extremely aroused by being humiliated in a sexual context. This could include things such as name calling and ordering them to complete degrading tasks.

Impact Play

Getting spanked, whipped or flogged sounds like a punishment for most but if you fit into the masochistic category you may in fact love it. The tools for impact play are extensive to say the least, with paddles, floggers and crops made from a range of materials such as leather, silicone and plastic available.

Juggling

So this one is a little puzzle to keep you on your toes. Think juggling multiple partners at once… group sex! Threesomes, foursomes and moresomes are a great way of exploring your sexuality with others.

Klismaphilia

Enemas involve body temperature water inserted into the anus. They are often completed in a medical setting or in preparation for anal play. It may stump you knowing that there exists a paraphilia where individuals become sexually aroused giving or receiving enemas.

Lactophilia

The name is quite suggestive though in case you were still wondering, lactophilia describes a paraphilia where sexual arousal is gained from breast milk.

Masochism

Having someone inflict pain on you is a dream come true for a masochist. With full consent, power play can be incredibly sexy to explore for these people.

Needle Play

Needles are the source of many people’s phobias so it may be difficult to comprehend that some people will willingly play with needles.

Olfactophilia

Stinky body parts especially the genital areas turn on those with this paraphilia. If you despise taking showers, you may find yourself a keeper in this minority.

Pony Play

Play pretending to be a noble stead is a very popular trend in the BDSM and kink world. I love horse riding but definitely prefer to be the rider in charge. Perhaps there’s still a place for me in this kink…

Queefing Fetish

A less discreet description of queefing is fanny farts (I cringe at this terminology) which are a turn on for some people.

Rape Fantasy

This one is an edgy kink that’s for sure and more common than you would think. Done with full consent, it can be a thrilling role play for a couple to explore (I cannot stress FULL CONSENT enough). Be sure to read up a guide on risk aware consensual kink!

Sadism

Inflicting pain on others is a thrill for a sadist and can be just as enjoyable for consenting partners.

Teratophilia

Sexual attraction to deformed or monstrous people. There’s certainly someone out there for everyone.

Under Arm Fetish

Pretty self-explanatory don’t you think? Most people with this fetish are aroused by the smell – different strokes for different folks I believe!

Voyuerism

Watching people have sex, often done without their knowledge. Again, a great fantasy to explore with full consent!

Watersports

Remove any images you may have of jet skis, boats or Marco-Polo. Instead, think of being urinated on for sexual gratification.

X-ray

Ok so not a kink or fetish but I’m way too excited to share this somehow. A video on Youtube exists of an MRI of people having sex. Too fun!!!

Yoni Gazing

Yoni is the Sanskrit word for vagina, with yoni gazing a very popular thing to explore in some circles.

Zoophilia

This one is a paraphilia not to explore for real although pretending to be animals with consenting adults can be playful and exciting!

Author: Stephanie Curtis, sexologist

Meet the newest member to our team of experts. Stephanie Curtis is a sexologist with a huge capacity to care. Involved in spirituality and tantra her articles are professional, articulate and interesting. Enjoy Steph’s writings at the adultsmart sexual wellness and health blog. www.stephanie-curtis.com

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