What are shaping up as the big issues for the upcoming Victorian election? Health? Education? The environment? According to leaked ALP strategy documents, the topic that will swing many Victorians is the critical question of speed camera fines.

If you are to believe the stories on some commercial network current affairs programs, or the claims on websites such as aussiespeedingfines.com, the government has created "the miss-perception [sic] that speed kills" in order to strip you of your "driving rights". Yes, the Victorian government has apparently been colluding with governments from around the world, police, scientists, economists and health workers to perpetuate the absurd notion that speed and safety are somehow interrelated.

Illustration: Kerrie Leishman

In order to claim that excessive speed isn't dangerous, the critics pretty much have to deny basic science. While Newton's laws of motion have been shown to be remarkably consistent and accurate since 1687, speed conspiracy theorists simply shrug off ideas such as force being the product of mass multiplied by acceleration; never mind that it was the very knowledge of such concepts that helped lead to the invention of automobiles in the first place. You can't have your physics and eat it too.

But in addition to those denying the basic science, there are even more people out there who fervently believe that speed cameras are all about revenue raising – a golden egg that bumps up the "coffers" of "greedy governments". Such people will write endless letters to the paper, buy "ghost plates" to obscure their registration number or GPS apps that alert them to speed camera hotspots – even change their vote – rather than just simply drive within the speed limit. Really, it's not that hard – you just match the big number on the sign to the little number on your speedo.