Nazis, white supremacists, the "alt-right" -- whatever dumb moniker you want to use (because the only people who care about the distinction are Nazis), they all have the miraculous ability to be both terrifying and ridiculous. Their ideas are scary, but the actual members seem like they could accidentally burn down their houses while trying to tie their shoes. To demonstrate, just take a look at some of the issues causing turmoil within their ranks.

5 Genetic Tests Have Ruined The White Power Fantasy For Many

There are a few companies out there that offer you the chance to spit in a cup and send it off so it can be genetically tested. Then you can find out all kinds of stuff about your ancestry, like if you really are a Cherokee princess (you're probably not) or if your ancestors are as proud and white as you (also probably not). Many a white putz has raced to modern genetic testing in the hopes that it will prove their purity.

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In one of the most famous cases, lily-assed Craig Cobb, a man who was trying to organize a whites-only town in North Dakota, found out on a daytime TV talk show that he's 14 percent Sub-Saharan African. That may not sound like a lot, until you realize that this is someone who thinks North Dakota is too black.

A UCLA study delved into 153 posts on the Neo-Nazi site Stormfront from people who had done these genetic tests, and the thousands of responses in the threads. As you might expect, a number of them opened their results like excited kids on Christmas morning, only to discover that Aryan Santa Claus wasn't real and they were not the glorious end result of infinite "whites only" bedrooms. Of course, each quickly concluded that their test was probably a filthy lie of Jewish origin, or that whatever percentage of their bigoted innards that wasn't fully white must be a statistical anomaly. Someone should've told them that facts don't care about their feelings.