THE return of Pot Noodle manufacturing to the UK has reminded the public they are shit.

Support for Golden Wonders decision to make Pot Noodles in the UK instead of China was quickly replaced by indifference once everyone thought about them.

Office worker Tom Logan said: I had a Pot Noodle the other day. Unfortunately no amount of childhood nostalgia could stop me tasting it.

Golden Wonder must have been amazed when they realised people would pay money for something that resembles edible rubber bands in hot water with a ‘vegetable’ stock cube crumbled in.

Sorry, thats unfair. You also get some bits of soya that are like polystyrene but without the richness of flavour. And dont forget the irresistible freeze-dried peas.

Food historian Donna Sheridan said: Pot Noodle is not something any sane person would want to eat, so the only explanation must be the always enriching combination of ruthless marketing and 1970s nostalgia.

Either that or people are just beasts wholl eat anything as long as it doesn’t actually say ‘faeces’ on the packet.

A spokesman for Golden Wonder said: Pot Noodle remains one of Britains most popular snacks, although even we are puzzled as to how anyone can even think about the Beef & Tomato flavour without retching until they want to die.

But do look out for exciting new flavours including Tripe & Vinegar, Savoury Chemical, and Arse in a Bucket.”