I’ve never been a huge BMW fan. Whether motorcycles or cars. I would just always find something else that ticked the boxes better or was simply more appealing overall.

Aside from the K1200/1300S, which let’s face it is nothing but a Honda Blackbird clone, I’ve never even been inclined to test ride one.

Let’s be honest, affordability has also always been a concern. Especially with their cars, the ones I do like were simply beyond affordable, so not even worth talking about. Now that I’m older and wiser, the bikes are at least reasonable.

Then came 2015 and BMW just seems to be on the money with rolling out bikes that appeal to me. Beyond that I’m also pretty disillusioned with the general dealership experience in Cape Town and my BMW-riding friends keep ranting and raving about the awesome service in Apple-like fanaticism that I just needed to make a plan.

So I popped an email off to Harry Clifton at Donford Cape Town with a frankly ridiculous request to come and ride four different bikes back to back in a single day. Not only did he get back to me in exactly 56 minutes, but was also massively accommodating with my request as if it happens every day.

On the list was the R1200RS which I expected not to like for reasons of comfort and being too similar in ergonomics to my Street Triple, but is shaft driven and runs with a Boxer Twin. Next up was the S1000XR which ticked all the comfort boxes again but has a chain drive and is running an inline-four cylinder which I’ll be frank is always a soulless experience to me.

Those are the two bikes I’m genuinely interested in buying but I added the RnineT to the list just “for science” reasons, especially as riding many miles on a Triumph Thruxton of late has opened up my mind to that kind of thing. Then I also got bludgeoned into at least trying the non-Adventure 1200GS because I apparently simply have to experience it. Really, my mates do sound like the Apple fandom when it comes to singing GS praises. It is the iPhone of motorcycling apparently.

What do I really want?

I thought it best to explain what I’m looking for so that my comments regarding wants and needs or likes and dislikes tie into something a little more sensible.

I’ve gone through a Suzuki GSX-R600, then a Buell XB9SX and most recently a Triumph Street Triple R. Through all the years I kept the Buell the longest as it was the most comfortable and I had gone through the motions of purchasing luggage for it which made it all the more useful. Had it not been for an intimately physical conversation with a Mazda and the resultant mental “misalignment” with motorcycling I would probably still be riding it today.

For various reasons, some of which involves my health the Triumph has been murdering me slowly day by day for the part year with it’s very hard pitched forward into the tank seat, hard as hell suspension and general discomfort to my wrists even though the bars have been raised by 20 mm.

So my next bike is all about comfort while still retaining at least reasonably sporty undertones. Part of that comfort is the ability to carry my daily luggage on a 75 km round trip without needing to strap it to my person while also looking reasonably appropriate in doing so. If a top box wouldn’t look utterly ridiculous on a Street Triple I would have done it ages ago already.

Apart from the comfort and luggage factors I also want a Batmobile, with every possible piece of technology that is available. My friends are desperate to have me join the off-roading fold but I simply don’t see the point buying a compromised bike when realistically all my riding would still be on tar.

I would rather buy a built for the road motorcycle now and in a year or two buy a properly off-roadable bike second hand and go nuts with that, not minding so much if I crash or bend this and that.

So let’s go riding…

2016 BMW R 1200 RS

To say I was apprehensive about this one was an understatement. I compared it to my Street Triple on Cycle Ergo beforehand and it just didn’t seem like it would make much of a difference at all switching to this bike for comfort.

Walking up to it the white and blue metallic paint is quite striking because there is enough of both colours that the bike appears more blue than it does white, whereas my own bike is almost too white with only little red accents. I’ve never had a blue one before…I like this.

The bike didn’t appear overly large walking up to it, maybe just a bit longer than I’m used to because of the luggage rack fitted as standard on the back. Getting onto it though there is a hell of a lot going on in front of you and it suddenly seems rather large, bringing back nightmares of the VFR1200 which is the only bike similar to this that I rode in recent years.

Then I hit the starter button and the sideways twist from the Boxer motor almost threw me off balance. I rode a 1200GS once many moons ago, I think when they just came out with the 1200 which was still air-cooled back then and I simply didn’t remember that at all maybe because the bike was already running.

Now I loved my Buell for it’s insane torque that made it walk backwards, so the fact that this thing was doing that same thing, only sideways had me already grinning inside.

Then I pulled in the clutch…and I thought something must be broken. The RS has the lightest clutch I have EVER used on a motorcycle. When I say light I don’t mean “less heavy” I mean basically there is no resistance at all, it’s like operating the lever on your toaster, not a clutch on what is essentially heavy machinery.

One of my biggest comfort issues is related to the clutch action making my hand and wrist seize which leads to me often just going clutch-less as much as possible to avoid using it.

So off I went down the driveway and waiting for traffic to turn into the road I realised this is probably the lowest bike of this kind I’ve ever ridden. I was happily putting both feet down and although catching the foot beg slightly with my boot (as I do with all BMW’s it seems) I was immediately in my comfort zone with this bike.

Down the road and doing a quick U-turn towards Hout Bay I wasn’t even a hundred metres away from the dealership before I was asking myself how on earth this thing is so comfortable when it shouldn’t be and started waiting for the penny to drop.

Granted the seat to peg distance does scrunch your legs up a little bit, definitely much more so than on the XR which has you sitting quite squarely, but it’s by no means uncomfortable or even noticeable short of direct comparison. The biggest surprise however was the ratio of my torso to the handlebars and that I didn’t even feel slightly strained in my lower back, upper back, shoulders or my wrists. I think it all comes down to the seat being so low that in essence the bars are higher than you expect, while also being so plush that your ass really doesn’t have anything to complain.

The bike has I think four different seat options adding more height or sportiness by tilting you forward into the tank. Personally unless my legs were to become uncomfortable over time I don’t see why I would opt for any of the others as that would then throw out the ass to handlebar ratio and cause a different concern.

Where the XR holds you firmly in place and is therefore more comfortable in the moment, the RS allows you to move around the seat a little bit. Someone commented that on the long road that’s exactly what you want as sitting in one place can get tedious. Again it wasn’t a complaint, just something I noticed comparing the two.

Pulling away from the robots (as we call them down here) that beautiful clutch action was working it’s magic, but since this bike was fitted with Gear Shift Assist Pro (aka BMW Quickshifter) I figured it’s time to forego that and see what happens. Looking down at the LCD dash display the gear indicator actually shows you a little arrow when going above 3000 rpm to indicate that you can now use Shift Assist…and so I did.

Let’s be honest, it’s not as smooth at lower revs and doesn’t work quite as well as on the 4-cylinder XR but it’s still pure magic compared to the unpredictable Triumph unit I had used recently. The Triumph one would often cut out the engine but then not change resulting in a sort of false neutral, whereas the BMW either works every single time or simply doesn’t do anything at all.

The true beauty of Shift Assist Pro is the Pro part though which allows you to down shift as well. Simply close the throttle as you would normally and pop the foot lever down, the bike does all the rev matching for you and bam you’ve gone from 4 to 3 and 2 to 1 on the LCD in front of you without the bike even dipping it’s head.

Obviously you need to pull the clutch in if you were heading for a complete stop, but the really useful part of the system is that you can just keep leaning hard on the brakes while smashing down the gearbox. Even better is that unlike an automatic car for instance this is completely optional. If you feel like doing it all yourself one day you just carry on as normal and ignore the Shift Assist system, unlike a car where a clutch level isn’t going to magically appear at your left foot.

The higher you rev it the smoother it shifts and I know many people don’t get the point, especially those adept at clutch-less shifting. Sure it’s probably only a little bit faster than doing it by hand but the real benefit is that it happens so smoothly. Further more this being a touring bike odds are you’ll have a passenger on the back and for that reason alone I would definitely opt-in for Shift Assist to reduce the usual helmet bashing, or possibly eliminate it all together.

Being able to shift both up and down without using the clutch also makes those leisurely one handed throttle-only rides an absolute pleasure. Yes yes I know we are supposed to keep all hands on deck at all times to keep the cops happy, but I’m sure we all do the left hand on hip right hand on throttle action at least once on our way home.

Amongst all this faffing with the gearbox though I simply couldn’t miss the megaton of torque that this 1170cc motor knocks out. In fact if you want to get serious and look at the numbers it’s pushing out 125 Nm @ 6800 rpm which is 12 Nm more than it’s S1000RR superbike sister in law at much lower revs, while not being far behind the almighty Ducati Panigale 1299. Without Googling a dyno chart I can also tell you with seat-of-the-pants surety that most of that torque happens just above idle in true Diesel-power fashion.

I’m sure the Boxer die hards know all about it, but anyone else that is uninitiated like I was before this ride need to make a plan and go ride a Boxer based BMW. Any of them will do the job.

At this point as I was heading up Table Mountain the bike was incredibly composed for such a seemingly large beast. It feels much bigger than it really is, probably more for me personally as I’m not used to having big windscreens and fairing mounted mirrors and such any more.

The mirrors sit far forward and are the widest point of the bike, unless you have the optional panniers fitted. Because of this my usual chicken wing style “will my elbows fit through that gap” style of measurement doesn’t exactly apply and because it wasn’t my bike I wasn’t going to chance too much lane splitting just yet.

Hitting a few curves up Kloof Nek the bike and I were immediately in tune with one another and leaning it all the way over while passing cars wasn’t even a thought pattern but rather an instinctive action.

Going over and down the hill on the other side I got stuck in some single lane traffic. I was a little liberal with the rear brake on my approach which had a sudden kickback action presumably from the ABS although I didn’t see the light come on. I must say it’s a genuine pleasure and a surprise to find a properly sized rear brake level on a bike that isn’t trying to hide under the engine and big enough for any size boot to lever comfortably.

While I was chilling in traffic and not wanting to cross any solid lines I took the time to mess around with the dashboard and the various electronic suspension and throttle settings. I must say as a BMW-n00b I’m still not quite sure if i was doing it right and tried every variety of long pressing or holding buttons to make stuff happen. I’m sure with genuine ownership and a manual in hand it would be a simple thing to get used to though.

I was under the impression that only Dynamic suspension mode actually changed anything dynamically so I spent most of my time in that mode as I felt it a little silly to have all this fancy suspension and then not use it. Then you might as well just use a spanner with conventional stuff. Turns out the Road mode is also fully dynamic and that Dynamic should actually translate to “sporty” where it’s just a bit more sensitive and adjusts itself much quicker to your surroundings.

Oddly I knew Dynamic was the more sporty option with throttle input so why I didn’t apply that logic to the suspension is beyond me. So I put it all in Dynamic mode and was soon free of the cars holding me up as I hit the beautifully sunny and surprisingly wind free coast.

By this time I was pretty settled in with the bike and so I gave it horns around the twisty bits. I can honestly say this is the safest and most comfortable I have ever felt on any bike at such a pace. On one hand I want to say that it always felt faster than it really was, yet at the same time it’s also deceptively quick. I think it’s more about the surprising lean angles at speed, rather than the speeds themselves.

At some point I was leaning it all the way over when I thought to myself “hmm…this thing has massive cylinder heads sticking out the side” and so I looked down to find what seemed positively dangerous to me. Needless to say it’s a false alarm and having a chat with the folks on the R1200RS Forums it sounds like nobody really puts their engines cases down short of actually crashing the bike, so it must just be a top down perception thing.

I was having such a ball that I smashed right past my usual stop for taking photos and just missioned onwards straight in and out of Hout Bay again spotting some unbranded Porsches (apparently they are testing the 718’s down here) but they sadly turned the other way so there was no fun to be had.

Again I was stuck in some horrendous traffic, but instead of trying to make a break past them I took it as a good opportunity to see what the bike is like in the real world. I’m happy to say that you can go as low in the revs as you dare and it pulls perfectly without any surging or dips in torque. The throttle is also smooth as silk and there are no surprises. Sure the Shift Assist doesn’t work at all with low revs, but I never found myself unaware of that and just rode accordingly.

Parking off for a quick picture my first thought was that this bike stands incredibly upright on it’s stand. In Cape Town the wind is a major worry and although the thing fortunately has a centre-stand I still find it a little ridiculous. I see the guys on the forum also complain about this so maybe with enough moaning BMW will issue a recall. Parking against a slight incline it could throw itself over by just starting it.

Having a quick walk around while taking pictures I just noticed so many little quality details. From those little wings in the flanks of the half fairing to just the way the multi piece tank is put together and the way the bolts are used as a feature instead of being hidden away. Everything has a serious quality feel about it. Pushing the windscreen up and down feels rock solid and I left it in the upright touring position before I set off again.

Making a very questionable u-turn I then almost saw my arse on a bloody acorn of all things. This is where the height comes into play. Were it a taller bike like the XR which I can ride quite happily but struggle with in these manoeuvres I might very well have found myself on my bike looking at the clouds contemplating the very large amount of money I would need to pay BMW to fix it. Meanwhile it was simply a minor “oopsie” and off I went again.

Putting the bike in Road mode for both throttle and suspension I definitely felt it was a bit softer but not in a wallowing kind of way. This would happily make for my default mode every day as the throttle is also just a little bit more docile and everything just gets soaked up in a little less frantic manner.

Throughout the experience of riding I can’t say I noticed anything different with regards to the shaft drive. Needless to say anyone worried about going for the shaft should just be more than happy about the lack of maintenance and have nothing else to fear. If anything the complete lack of drivetrain response came to the fore with the XR I rode after, but more on that later.

Somewhere in the middle of all this I realised that I hadn’t tied up my helmet, which is very rare for me as I’m very methodical safety first kind of guy. Probably got distracted with excited or chatting to the guys at the dealership. It was the perfect excuse to try out the cruise control though, something I still haven’t really felt the need for on bikes. I’m piss poor at balancing a bike hands free, but having the throttle stay on makes all the difference and it was quite easy steering it with my legs while fastening my lid. The cruise control controls (<<tricky one there) were a little more confusing than what I recently used on the Triumph Tiger but worked well once I figured it out.

Sadly I didn’t really hit any proper highway with the bike so can’t really comment on it’s touring ability, but being used to no wind protection whatsoever it was a whisper quiet experience behind that screen. I would imagine it will offer a fair bit of protection for the rain as well, especially around the leg area.

Enough faffing about with Road modes it was back to Dynamic as I approached the famous (to us Capies at least) De Waal drive and by now I was hammering every gear home with Shift Assist and back down again as required. The bike feels smaller and more agile the faster you go and nothing like the tank that is the VFR1200. I could happily see myself riding this all day long with a huge smile on my face, hoping for the road to go ever onwards.

Getting back to the dealership I still found it hard to quantify my experience as the numbers still didn’t add up…I should be unhappy and sore from being uncomfortable, yet I was refreshed and ready for more.

I’m not one to give anything 10/10. In fact not having endless moans and complaints even about things I really like is unusual. Yet with the RS I find it hard to find anything that I would consider a deal breaker…absolutely nothing comes to mind apart from nobody giving it to me for free.

Superbly comfortable, great diesel torque engine with loads of flair and soul, brilliant gearbox with the best clutch I’ve ever used and beyond all else a pretty good price too. I guess if I need to moan about something it would be the LCD display that wasn’t all that great in sunlight, but after the fact I’ve heard there are a few different display options that might sort that out as well.

Ultimately, as with all things motorcycling it comes down to price. The R1200RS is R176 000 after the R/$ plummet adjustment which is still a good deal considering we get pretty much fully specced bikes in SA for less than the base models elsewhere. Gear Shift Assist Pro will cost you another R5500 and the Top Box + Panniers will be in the region of R15k. So for less than R200k you have pretty much everything you could ever need and I think that’s a pretty damn good deal.

Don’t piss your money away on keyless go nonsense, rather use it as a “discount” for the Navigation which will be infinitely more useful. Sorry I don’t know how much that costs, but regardless it still makes more sense than not having a key…but still having a key which you need to carry on your person and will inevitably lose.

In conclusion, if this is the type of bike you are looking for, or even if it isn’t, you need to do yourself a favour and go test ride one. For me personally it’s pretty much perfect.

2015 BMW S1000XR

Although I was apprehensive about the chain drive and not being the biggest fan of inline-fours I expected those to become a distant memory as like most people I don’t mind a megaton of power on my bikes and on paper it seemed to tick all the comfort boxes.

It’s also not very pretty in a conventional sense, but does have a sort of weird Transformers like appeal to it. If anything, it’s at least different.

Having also read and watched every review I could find on the bike beforehand, people appear to be blown away by it and generally found to edge out the Multistrada based more on preference than anything else.

So it was a little odd to find that the more and more exposure I had to the bike the less and less I liked it, but let’s not get too ahead of ourselves.

Jumping on, and I mean that literally, since it’s fricken tall and you can’t really mount it like a horse as you would with the GS, the first thing that I noticed was that the clutch is cable based instead of hydraulic as on the RS.

Now it being cable isn’t a real issue if it worked properly, but it does leave me with a sense of lower quality and questioning WHY? Thing is it doesn’t work properly either, the action is very stiff and maybe it needed some adjustment but after getting to the friction point it would have a centimetre or so to travel still before hitting the stop.

Sure you’ll argue as with the RS what does the clutch really matter if you are have a factory fitted Shift Assist Pro system (same as the optional for the RS) but the thing is inevitably you get stuck in traffic staying in the same gear where you end up feathering the clutch the whole time and that becomes very tedious very quickly if the clutch is fighting you.

The further I went the more and more the clutch was a painful reminder and a pain in my ass. Especially once you start realising that the engine comes out of a superbike and is therefore quite gutless as low revs and makes all it’s power at the top. This is what made the Boxer in the RS so lovely is that super low down torque which is non-existent here.

Anyway out of the dealership I went and needing to stop for traffic again the immediate reminder of the height of this thing is apparent. Truth be told it was actually better than I expected but much like the 800GS I rode recently the super wide footpegs do make for some exciting times until you adjust the way you put your foot down. I say foot because in most cases putting it in first and dropping your left foot is your best bet. Yeah, you could tip toe on both feet but ultimately that’s more unstable in most situations.

Pulling away the comfortable seat is quite apparent and the leg to seat ratio has you sitting almost square legged. As I said before, the seat does have a tendency to hold you very firmly in place which isn’t everyone cup of tea. I suspect it this was done very much on purpose because when you open her up you need every bit of resistance to hold you in your seat when those 160 horses try to buck you off.

Immediately however I noticed that the bike seems quite cramped. Moving onto the balls of my feet I was standing on the heat shield of the exhaust and later trying to “Meerkat” (this is a pretend offroad bike after all) I found it very odd standing up with the various bits getting in the way of your feet. Sitting here now I recall the rear brake lever also irritating me for some reason but I can’t even begin to remember why, right now.

Being irritated by the clutch and by now quite familiar with Shift Assist I used that immediately and I must say it does work much better on the XR. Not to say it doesn’t work well on the RS in isolation, but compared directly there is definitely a smoother shift with the XR across all rev ranges. Oddly the XR doesn’t have an indication on screen of when to shift which seemed a little strange all things considered this being the “superbike” of the two.

There is an awesome burp from the exhaust when closing throttle at lower speeds and it quickly became quite addictive to do this on purpose, in traffic. In general the engine isn’t really all that great when stuck in the aforementioned. I found myself constantly on the clutch trying to find reasonable power, it’s either too much power or too little torque. Although torque is only marginally less than the RS at 116 Nm it peaks at just over 3000 revs higher at 9,250 rpm and feels like it just about starts there too.

Suspension is the same dynamically electronic system as in the RS but seems to have slightly longer travel I guess for that pseudo-offroad GS feeling they were going after. The problem here is that it seems to be sporty while also being soft at the same time. I found a lot of fork dive when suddenly getting on the brakes which makes for what seems to be a lot more unstable experience over the on rails notion of the RS. Some people will call that exciting, personally I find it a little rude but then again I’m apparently an old man now. The bike almost felt like it had a flat tyre (it didn’t I checked) and I won’t go so far as saying I didn’t trust it, but it just doesn’t feel like the engine is matched very well to the chassis…which it really isn’t otherwise more people would build weird bikes like these.

I can’t say I felt a massive difference between the Road and Dynamic suspension modes here and riding the exact same roads I felt it was harder but wallowing a bit more. Throttle wise they should just rename Dynamic to Satanic because it’s absolutely mental. As I said previously that seat was probably designed to keep you on the bike because when you rev it out you really need to prepare yourself and brace against the monstrous power that gets unleashed. Being a superbike engine the 160hp happens at 11,000 rpm but it’s more the slight shot effect from about 7,000 rpm that catches you off guard. There is just this sudden rush of power out of nowhere almost as if it’s turbo driven and if you aren’t prepared for that you might find yourself on the tar with the bike soldiering on by itself.

Which brings me back to the main reason I just didn’t like the experience. The engine just doesn’t seem to match the style of the chassis and the two seem to be fighting each other. I can only think that the people raving about this bike are used to the relatively low-powered GS (in comparison) and therefore bowled over by the madness. Personally I think it doesn’t make a very good GS and at the same time isn’t a great superbike so I ask myself why not just buy a GS if you wanted that or an S1000RR if you want a superbike.

Back to comfort I simply couldn’t acclimatize to the high bars. Yes I’m not used to those and I had a similar experience on the Triumph Tiger, where my arms go numb and the usual lower back paid simply moves up to mid/high back pain and climbs right into my shoulder blades. Maybe in time that would change, but I very much doubt it. Either I’m too short in the upper body and therefore incompatible, or the bike itself just isn’t quite right. Also, this overly upright position is exactly why the crazy horsepower just doesn’t work as you always end up clenching yourself to the bike instead of relaxing which may be exactly why I find my upper back not complying.

The buzz is real! I thought people were maybe just being sensitive in reviews but I can now fully agree that the buzzing through the bars is just insane and very very irritating even just riding through urban areas. I can only imagine it will be a hell of a lot worse on the open read and would be a serious deal breaker. Further to this the vibration from the chain drive was so crazy coming up through the seat that at certain revs I felt like I might pee myself. Maybe it all comes back to the engine being in the wrong frame and just not coping wel with lower speeds?

Much like a Honda Civic Type-R this bike feels like it just wants to be at 100% all the time and when it’s not, well it sucks pretty badly.

On a more positive note I liked the clocks and LCD display on this much more so than the RS. There is just less going on and so it’s much easier to read and find your way towards information. Between the two the tacho is swopped for the speedo, so on the XR you have a large rev counter with a digital speed readout which is my preference.

The windscreen does the job I guess. I’m not really an authority on these things but it did seem somewhat “flappy” compared to the RS. Overall actually the quality just doesn’t seem quite there with the XR. I can’t put my finger on it exactly but it just doesn’t feel as solid which when considering the price of R 218 000 doesn’t really make it seem like a very good deal.

It seems to be priced exactly in the same ballpark as the Multistrada locally but even though I haven’t ridden that yet I’m not quire sure it can compete. Yes on paper the Multistrada is lacking a quickshifter but also comes with Keyless ride, which granted nobody needs) and has a trick up it’s sleeve with cornering lights. The Multistrada also has some optional nice to haves like the tank bag with USB integration for you iPhone which also talks to the bike through an app. On paper the Multistrada has DVT and is already a Twin which should sort out the low end grunt problem I had with the XR.

Overall then I have to say that I didn’t like it very much and it went from my most likely to purchase assumption to “do not want” very quickly. Just shows you not to judge a book by it’s cover but at the same time I’ve also learnt that a quick test ride doesn’t always tell you the whole story.

I’ll come back to this one after riding the Multistrada somewhere in April, but the XR certainly isn’t the bike for me and I’m not convinced it’s the best choice in this class if you absolutely have to have this kind of thing.

2015 BMW RnineT

The first thing you realise about the RnineT is just how small it is compared to the other two. It’s not that the chassis itself is smaller but there is just less protruding everywhere and the ass has pretty much been chopped off. Well not chopped off…it was never there to begin with. The rear end of the bike is pretty much a seat floating on an almost invisible metal strut.

So much like my Buell, it’s a BMX with a massive engine then…and that makes it awesome.

By and large it’s the “old” aircooled version of the same Boxer engine fitted to the RS and GS and many other S’s this time in a 1170cc configuration pushing out 110 hp at a low 7,500 rpm.

Who cares about horses though? It’s a 119 Nm at 6,000 rpm that makes it truly spectacular. I thought the RS had an interesting torque twist when you started it, but this one takes the cake. First it tries to throw itself off the stand when it fires up, but I swear when you pull away from a standing stop while turning it even pulls slightly to the side. That’s by no means a complaint, I love it for that.

It makes a gorgeous noise and out of the three it is the one that I didn’t feel needed any help to sound better. Then I did some reading and found out the stock pipes are actually unbranded Akrapovic’s which explains all that. Why can’t they just do that with all bikes? Or better yet just sell them with no pipes from the factory and let you choose one on order, since the stock ones are really just a waste of money and metal in most cases.

Unlike just about every other BMW or modern bike for that matter there are no electronics here. Short of basic ABS, gone are the traction control, ride modes and electronic suspension gizmos. There’s no shift assistance either but you do get a rather large gear indicator on the screen in front of you.

It’s just you and the RnineT…for better or worse.

Which means out of the three bikes here this was the most fun to ride because there is that little bit of safety net (or lack there of) fear that leaves everything in your hands and demands that you pay attention. Not that I ever felt unsafe, but you know you get used to these things and take them for granted.

It’s hard to compare this with anything as there aren’t many like it. If anything I decided to ride this bike because I spent a lot of time on a similar, yet nothing alike, Triumph Thruxton recently which opened my mind to this kind of thing.

I like the RnineT more than the Thruxton for the reason that it’s a modern bike with retro styling, whereas the Thruxton is pretty much an old bike in the modern world with some technological compromises.

The R9 has modern upside-down forks, a shaft drive and proper fuel injection with presumably ride-by-wire throttle as well. It’s modern and fresh for all things but it’s styling and even that isn’t really old or classic just a throwback to a different era. It has proper brakes too with dual discs in front…where the Triumph can’t do math.

As spartan as the clocks and controls might be there is really everything you might need, with large tachometer and speedometer around a subtle digital display that has luxuries like a fuel gauge, gear indicator and the usual trip and odometer readings. Warning lights are sort of hidden away above the display but clearly visible when lit up…unlike the Thruxton where they are near invisible all of the time.

More than anything though it’s modern for having simple every day should be on every bike things like a normal ignition with built-in steering lock and a normal petrol cap that uses a key to protect your petrol, both of which are lacking on the Thruxton for being retro (and foolish).

Controls are equally bare bones for the lack of electronics since you don’t need all those buttons to control something that isn’t there.

Pulling away from the shop I noted the clutch is quite heavy but being hydraulic it’s nowhere as bad as the XR’s unit and really is only heavy by virtue of the RS’s being feather light. Obviously now I needed to do all the shifting myself and so I noticed that the gearbox does take a bit of effort through the gears but is precise and sure footed. I don’t want to say clunky, but it can be a bit noisy.

For the lack of shift assist I tried a few clutchless efforts, but I must say it takes very precise timing otherwise that twisting torque does throw you off course a little bit and I think for this type of bike it’s hardly necessary.

Sitting in the shop I felt the bike might be a bit uncomfortable as the reach to the bars is quite forward but once you get going none of this was an issue. If anything this being the third bike in a row I expected to be hurting by now but all three BMW’s treated me well and this being the most uncomfortable of the three I was still riding quite happily and without strain.

Burning it through corners it was the most fun I had all day. The bike was pretty much built for short jaunts like these around the coast. There is no wind protection at all, but that adds to the visceral nature of this bike and makes it feel faster than you are really going. Sure I wouldn’t want to take it on any long distance trips but if this was all you had in the garage then it would do that quite happily as well I’m sure.

Suspension is sporty but comfortable. I hit a few pot holes and bumps in the road and they made themselves known but at the same time you can hit a speed bump at speed and hardly take notice any notice of it, something that my Street Triple fails at miserably. If you want to learn how to get your knee down this will probably be one of the best bikes for that as you sit almost cruiser low but without the usual cruiser compromise in handling. Riding with jeans only I almost wished I had put my full leathers on for the day so I could give it a try.

At the same time it’s not a bike that I feel you need to get off of to go around corners. You can just drop your shoulder under spirited riding and you are good as gold…or just sit right in your seat and counter steer it. It’s a very easy bike to ride at pace and have major fun on, I was smiling all the way even with the wind coming up.

BMW are embracing the Harley Davidson lifestyle approach to bikes with this one by offering a multitude of customization options. Essentially they want every bike to look different and have it’s own personality. For that reason you are paying a premium for styling on this one as the sum of it’s parts don’t quite add up.

I know it’s somewhat unfair to compare the RnineT to the Thruxton which is a much cheaper bike, but it’s my only point of reference. I think the Ducati Xdiavel which I should ride soon enough will be the closest rival in specification, but at the same time it will also be much more expensive.

So at R162, 990 the RnineT is in it’s own price class compared to other manufacturers and it doesn’t seem like very good value for money compared to the RS at R175,750 from the same stable which comes with a whole lot more bells and many more whistles. Yet at the same time it’s going to be a very particular customer who wants this kind of thing and I think the money will be somewhat irrelevant to them because the heart wants what the heart wants.

For me personally it doesn’t work as a primary bike, as it doesn’t tick all my day to day boxes, but I would LOVE to have one as a second or third bike in a few years. Probably off the second hand market when the price makes a bit more sense to my pocket for a lesser used vehicle.

The BMW Donford Cape Town Experience

I can only liken it to my Harley Davidson experiences from back in the day when I owned a Buell and even though I was treated like a Black Sheep amongst those folk I never felt like a number.

The last few years my dealership experience from all the different brands have been somewhat lacking. Either you walk in and have to beg for service, or you send an email and never get a response.

Then when you actually want to ride the bikes they either aren’t available or you need to wait for them and it’s like they are doing you a favour. Some of them don’t even bother to come talk to you even if you help yourself and sit on the bikes in store and it’s not like they didn’t notice you…they looked you in the eye when buzzing you in the door. I’ll never own a certain orange bike from pseudo-Germany for this reason.

Harry Clifton from Donford Cape Town responded to my email in exactly 56 minutes from sending it and included an extremely positive response. I rocked up and it took a few minutes to get the first bike ready and the others were all there waiting for me as I got back from each ride.

The dealership itself is large and every single person who works there is pleasant to chat to and not once was I ignored. At the same time they also weren’t overbearing trying to sell me something which is usually the dark side of customer service. It’s very obvious to me that the staff have received proper training.

Although the coffee shop inside the dealership is a little too hipster lifestyle for me I’m getting older and starting to embrace this kind of thing. I sat down and had a quick lunch after the XR ride and it was a lovely experience being surrounded by bikes and motorcycling culture. Oddly I’m sure a number of people in the coffee shop have never ridden bikes in their lives…so maybe BMW is on to something there.

If I would change anything about the test rides it would have maybe been to have a bit of education around the controls of the two more complex bikes. I guess most of their customers aren’t new to BMW’s so this isn’t really a usual concern.

Both the staff in store and my friends have also stated that courtesy bikes when coming for a service should never be a problem. Something I haven’t experienced in a long time and would be a welcome “feature”. BMW owners seem to generally be the types who ride every single day and they understand this other than other dealers that think you can do without your bike for extended periods.

So what happened to the GS? Well by the end of the day I was running a bit short on time as well as energy. I had a look at the various GS’s on the floor and took a seat here and there and realised that I wouldn’t buy the Trophy because it doesn’t have Batmobile features and quite frankly I’ve never liked the look of the GS so I know I won’t actually ever buy one unless I get offroad mad.

To appease the GS-fanboys I will however go ride a GS should I decide to take the plunge on an RS later in the year. I’ll actually go ride the RS again too just to be absolutely damn sure.

It’s the little details that make all the difference, such as finding the side-stand on all three bikes I rode with the first try. The multitude of seating options or just being height adjustable and configurable. Customer service that has so far been truly spectacular and above all else people taking you seriously and treating you like a genuine buyer.

BMW as a whole have me convinced. I’m ready to join the cult and become a skinhead.