"In March 2011, all e-book readers will be recalled after it is discovered that e-books are shit."

Dr. Stuart Clive Ashen (yes, a real doctor; of psychology, no less), or simply Dr. Ashen, born 16 December 1976, is the premier source on YouTube for reviews of Shoddy Knockoff Products — primarily electronics and toys. He also reviews equally horrible retro British games in a series called Terrible Old Games You've Probably Never Heard Of (which evolved into a crowdfunded book published by Unbound of various bad, old computer games), and most horrifically of all, really cheap and/or really old processed food. He has also created two small series of comedy videos for the BBC Comedy Extra website, named Ashen's Tech Dump and Back Space.

He co-starred in the sci-fi webseries/ARG The Proxy, which ran through March 8th-17th, 2012. Unfortunately, the contest aspect, not-so-subtly sponsored by Alienware, was available only for those living in the UK. Regardless, it is available to watch worldwide here .

His site is here , his YouTube page here (his overflow channel is here ) and his Twitch channel is here , which is usually live on a Wednesday. He also served as the narrator for Ninja the Mission Force, duplicating the Large Ham British narrator of Godfrey Ho's films. In 2016, he and Internet chef Barry Lewis created the channel Barshens, which is available to watch here .

He has made a crowd-funded film called The Quest for the Game Child, in which he searches for the eponymous knockoff game system, and also appeared in the Science Fiction film The Darkest Dawn. He's also finished crowdfunding another film on Indie Go Go called Ashens and the Polybius Heist about the eponymous fictional video game, and it is now being made.

13 Is Unlucky: On Day 13 of the 2019 advent calendars, Ashens opens his door to find that there's nothing inside. Ashens: Fucking hell! Unlucky for some...

Absurdly Sharp Blade: Come on, it was The World's Sharpest Knife.

Accentuate the Negative: Being ripoffs of other consoles and generally being really bad, POP Stations inspire a lot of this in Ashen's reviews.

The Poundland Special series, as well as the holiday tat reviews, tend to focus more on this than anything.

Accidental Misnaming: During the PCP Station LTPS Handy Game review, Ashen accidentally refers to the PSP Go as the "PCP Go", immediately correcting himself after doing so. Ashen: (sighs in frustration) It's confused me now.

Adaptation Dye-Job: Chef Excellence the puppet has much darker skin than the model he's based on. Also, his hair is black, rather than the lighter tone on the box. Dan Tomlinson's portrayal of him in The Quest For The Game Child has lighter skin than the puppet version but still has darker hair than the original.

Alternate Character Interpretation: invoked Numerous. He pretty much popularized the image of kid's show Plucky Comic Relief Noseybonk as a murderous Memetic Psychopath.

He (jokingly) implied that Rick Santorum was a Star Wars character.

Suggested the Polly Pockets "Cutants" line of toys was the result of Polly turning into a Nazi Mad Scientist, experimenting on animals until she could get ahold of some "roofies" and a few human test subjects.

He claims an interactive E.T. toy (essentially an E.T.-shaped Furby) is an Eldritch Abomination similar to the Lovecraftian cosmic horror, even starting the video with a slightly changed Call of Cthulhu quote.

Siri is always interpreted by him as a racist, due to being specifically designed for use in the US more than the UK. Even when being questioned about said uselessness.

The Wii Fit Trainer as Adolf Hitler .

. Invoked twice for "Chef Excellence" (with the first example lampshaded by Stuart when he notes that Chef Excellence doesn't have a character to begin with since he doesn't exist)... The Hero: Chef Excellence (stock photo version) is a chef-themed superhero out to stop the evil Chef Ineptitude (Ainsley Harriot) from absorbing the souls of the Chefs Tongue (famous UK health food expert Jamie Oliver), Hair (Gary Rhodes), and Rude (Gordon Ramsay) to form Chef Pestilence (Marco Pierre White). To save the day, Chef Excellence needs to store the Chefs in his patented Stay-Fresh Bags. The Failure: Chef Excellence (puppet version) is a pathetic waste of a man after being replaced on the Stay-Fresh bags by the also-fictional Max Hoffman. He's taken up a fondness for gin as he attempts to reclaim his title through cheap dishes for Stuart, and is prone to fits of psychotic rage whenever Hoffman and/or his bags are brought up. This version appears more. Live Action Chef Excellence: This version is again reinterpreted for the movie and later videos as Chef Geoffrey Excellence, an inept cook who is more out to sell kitchen products than produce food. Quest for the Game Child states he doesn't even know how to cook. Played by Dan Tomlinson. Also called "The Only Version We Have Licensing Rights To".

He also believes that the 2012 Olympics mascots are evil demons. Ashens: I think that case isn't to protect him from us, but rather us from him. In the 2013 Playmobil advent calendar, he gets a pile of green hay with holes so you can put a pitchfork in it. He interprets it as a creepy grass mask which gradually becomes an otherworldly monster (and later monsters, once he obtains more of them).

Aluminum Christmas Trees: Lampshaded with a bootleg action figure of Dude Love.

with a bootleg action figure of Dude Love. Some non-British fans are surprised to find out that Noseybonk was a real character from a British children's television show and not just some horror creature he devised.

Same thing with the Game Child. Yes, it was indeed a real knockoff of the Game Boy, although Stuart's description in The Quest for the Game Child is significantly exaggerated, particularly in regard to the fact that it was supposedly radioactive. Lampshaded during the actual review of the Game Child when he states, "Yes, we didn't make it up for the hilarious narrative purposes of the film. This is an actual ripoff that was sold to the shops."

During the hilarious "violin history" on the box of the Chinese electronic violin, he wonders what the child of a violin and a piano would be. Leonardo da Vinci's "Viola Organista" would probably have been a better answer than "accordion" .

. In the Doctor Who LCD Adventure Game review, he's baffled about a stage where the Wire, an energy being living in the television network is escaping in a car... except that in the episode the level of the game is based on, the Wire does exactly that, being inside a 50s-style portable TV.

Ambiguous Syntax: Mentioned in his review of Human Killing Machine: is it about a human who is a killing machine, or a machine that kills humans?

And I Must Scream: In the second episode of Ashen's Tech Dump, he reviews three (thankfully fictional) games, one of which is known as Vinnie the Vole's Existential Nightmare, which made for huge amounts of nightmare fuel when Ashen found out the game consists entirely of the titular Vole wandering around a dark, plain square room. He then freezes with a terrified look on his face, then runs from side-to-side making a beeping noise supposed to be screaming, then runs into the corner, holds a gun to his head, closes his eyes and the screen goes black after a dull electronic pffut sound is heard .

. YOUR FAULT

The game has been defictionalized , including a ZX Spectrum homebrew flavor. At least one Let's Play channel not familiar with Dr Ashen reviewed it under the impression it was a real game.

defictionalized , including a ZX Spectrum homebrew flavor. At least one Let's Play channel not familiar with Dr Ashen reviewed it under the impression it was a real game. On his website's forum, Ashen revealed a Facebook message he read on the Vinnie Vole fanpage: "There should be a Vinnie board game. As soon as you open the box, there will be a slip of paper that kindly informs you that 'YOUR ACTIONS HAVE DAMNED VINNIE'."

a Facebook message he read on the Vinnie Vole fanpage: This inspired him to make up his own rules for a board game: "You open the box and it is full of jewelery and nothing else. Ten minutes after opening it the Police knock down your door and accuse you of stealing it during a burglary you know nothing about, which resulted in the death of an old woman. In court they produce all sorts of false evidence and you end up being sentenced to 10 years. Six months into the sentence you wake up at 3am and see Vinnie silently staring at you from outside your cell door. Then it suddenly comes back to you - you DID commit the burglary, and it was you who pushed the old woman down the stairs. Vinnie points at you and screams and screams until you go mad. The winner is the player with the most counters ."

The Polly Pocket animal object things are noted to be in a perpetual state of pain and suffering after being fused with inanimate objects via Polly's psychotic experiments.

And This Is for...: While crushing a toy Storm Trooper in a press, he turns the handle, every time listing off all of the sins of the Star Wars franchise.

Anti Humour: After biting into a foodstuff described as glutinous in this video , "If you were to look up the word 'glutinous' in a dictionary, you would find a written definition of the word, because that's how dictionaries work, they don't have pictures!"

Arch-Enemy: The autofocus. Many, MANY times. The crowning example comes during his Open Pandora review, where the camera focuses on a hair on its own lens.

Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking: His review of the Chintendo (or "Ken Sing Ton") Vii showed that it was a simplified NES in design with a Wii controller slapped on, 2D PlayStation 1-esque graphics, weighed nothing even with a small lump of useless metal inside it, and had cost him financially and mentally very much. His reason for giving it a 0/10? No lanyard (when the box said there would be one included).

From his review of the Playmobil Blind Bags: Ashen: A young boy in a hoodie?! WHAT?! What are you doing here, mate? Look at all these freaks! There are vampires, executioners, and drunk people! In the video where he announces that he'll be appearing at MCM 2015, Stuart was in the middle of some sort of ritual before he started talking about the convention and started recording. As a result, there are three items on the couch: from left to right, a skull with "THEY" written on the forehead, a lit candle placed inside of a Yog-Sothoth candle holder, and a Wii Fit Trainer amiibo (which is notorious among collectors for its rarity).

Artifact of Doom: He often jokes that certain particularly creepy items, be it from concept or because they took a deep plunge into the Uncanny Valley from the start, are these; from merely murderous dolls to actively apocalyptic things like the Santa heads from the 2012 Christmas Tat video . Ashen: One thing that would make us feel better, a nice, welcoming jolly Father Christmas face. Unfortunately, I haven't got any of those, instead I've got these terrifying, dead-eyed monstrosities: Santa Head Decorations! Great for trees, walls, doors and mirrors? I wouldn't let these things near a mirror, they'd probably cause a world-ending supernatural event!

Artifact Title: "Poundland Special", when it first began in 2009, began as being mostly items from Poundland, but has grown to include items from Poundworld and 99p stores, as well as items from overseas discount stores that were sent to him, to the point that most of the tat in the newer "Poundland Special" videos is no longer from Poundland. Lampshaded in "Poundland Special 3", where he states "We're really stretching the use of the word 'special'", and in "Poundland Special: Loom Band Pregnancy Wig", where he states "...where every item costs one pound and came from Poundland, except most of the items which didn't come from Poundland, but came from 99p stores, or Poundworld, or in fact, possibly another place where everything costs a pound". Somewhat reversed since 2016, after Poundworld and 99p Stores went defunct, leaving Poundland as the main source for cheap tat once again (though some merchandise can still come from overseas).

Artistic License  Astronomy: When looking at the Jeli Baff Ashens says that "Planet Purple" is not a good name for a colour because planets are too large to be all one colour- "apart from Mars, 'cause it's red and rubbish". If you look at a picture of Mars ◊ you can clearly see that it is far from being consistently red. A better choice would have been Uranus ◊ , which is an almost perfectly uniform cyan.

Ascended Meme: After someone did a Gentlementlemen remix of his Retieval Review, he was heard humming it in a later video and put an annotation link to it. There's also his spinning Stig stinger, which is a shoutout to a meme from his forum. (A rotating Stig with a ska cover of 'Who Do You Think You Are Kidding Mr. Hitler')

Ascend to a Higher Plane of Existence: He thinks this is what will happen to Shane in the Camp Rock LCD game. Instructions: Help Shane catch the notes to earn points and advance to higher levels!

Ashen: ...of existence?

Author Vocabulary Calendar: "Sprue," meaning those little pieces of plastic that come off the mold for a toy or something similar. He himself admits he has no idea how he came to know the word. most of the time, if he needs a unit of time to describe a duration, he'll use femtoseconds (a millionth of a billionth of a second).

Bad Impressionists: In "10 Reviews in 10 Minutes 2", his assistant Dan does an impression of Ashen's opening which Ashen himself says sounds more like Dame Maggie Smith from Downton Abbey.

Bait-and-Switch: The second Girls' Toys review came out directly after The Proxy. The first thing he says: Ashen: Oh, you would not believe what happened to me over the last couple of weeks... Oh, you would not believe what happened to me over the last couple of weeks... I painted a spare room! It was crazy! You should've seen it. Also, the 3DS Mii QR video. the first QR code does give you Noseybonk as promised. The subsequent codes... do not. The one labelled "Excellence" gets you a Mii with a mouth where his eyes should be and a mole or single eye on his chin named "Cylox 7", the one labelled "Godmonster" gets you the Forever Alone face, and the one labelled "Ashens" gives a tall, slender woman with a backwards three on her face named "I AM 3". Also included is a Mentski Mii called HUSSSSSSSS.

BBC Quarry: Discussed in his review of the Doctor Who LCD Adventure Game, where he explains that whenever the Doctor actually goes to a foreign planet in the seventies, it usually looks like a rock quarry in Wales — the reason being it literally was, to his understanding.

Be Careful What You Wish For: Anvil-dropped in the Toy Box, Geek Gear July 2016 video. While reviewing the 90s box, Ashen joked about how the 80s box would probably come with the notorious E.T. game after being all pleased with receiving a copy of Link's Awakening DX for the Game Boy. A while later he moves on to the 80s box and find that there is indeed a copy of E.T. in there, and broke down corpsing. After finally regaining his composure, he warned viewers to never ever joke about these kinds of things because they may become true.

Big "SHUT UP!": He gives one to the annoying nature screensaver towards the end of the iPhone 5G review (jump to 29:25 for when he has his fill).

Bile Fascination: His claim to fame is In-Universe a series of video reviews of]] POP Stations, toys and games, almost all of which are crap. Many of them are donations from viewers.

Biting-the-Hand Humor: During the WLL review, the YouTube staff terminate the video when he mocks the partnership program.

Blah Blah Blah: Tends to do this as he skims through uninteresting bits of the text he reads.

Blatant Lies: A Running Gag of his. He denotes all sarcastic comments with "...he lied." "<Sarcasm>. Also, I am a crazy liar"

Usually points it out on packaging blurb by appending the phrase "And other lies" to the non-existent awesomeness being described.

"Blind Idiot" Translation: Nearly every foreign product has manuals filled with this. It's so bad that Dr. Ashen is angry when it doesn't happen. Sometimes even the name is badly translated. Ashen: You've probably read the title of : You've probably read the title of this video and thought " Surely there can't be a POP Station called Retieval Mankind's Batman !" It's gotten to the point where he can read them as clearly as properly spoken English, and should probably be considered fluent in word salads.

The Board Game: He has reviewed several board game adaptations of computer and arcade games.

Body Horror: The Fight Club action figures, which have limbs twisted around the wrong way and faces painted on wrongly. Apparently, it can spread. A knock off Superman figure has flesh tone blades growing out of its arms due to it being a repainted Batman figure.

In the Christmas Tat Special 2012 he remarked "There's a fairly thick theme running through this year's special about Father Christmas, and Body Horror." The items reviewed include a starfish-like creature with Santa Claus' screaming face twisted into a dog toy, a Santa Claus on a swing hanging from a rope attached to the inside of his skull and what appears to be a Cthulhu-Santa hybrid.

Book Safe: In an early POPStation review he has a hollowed out science encyclopedia with a handgun inside it.

Bread, Eggs, Breaded Eggs: In the My Little Pony Mystery Bags video, Ashens describes his friend Andy as "very keen on chemicals, fire and chemical fires". No points for guessing what happens to the items featured in said video.

Break the Cutie: After ingesting some Chinese century egg and subsequently sicking his guts up, Ashens is notably bitterer and swearier for the rest of the video. Given that at the time it was, by a wide margin, the worst thing he had ever tasted, this is somewhat understandable.

Brick Joke: In Poundland Special 3 (April 2010), he tries to test the Packbuster's claims with a LCD game based on Doctor Who. He also claimed that he will review it later, but it took until December 2011 for it to be reviewed. Turns out it had fallen behind a wardrobe. The post for it on ashens.com also lampshaded its former What Happened to the Mouse? status.

The post for it on ashens.com also lampshaded its former What Happened to the Mouse? status. In one video, Ashens reviews an ET "furby", becoming increasingly scared of it throughout the video. He eventually removed all the casing. In this Poundland Special , the ET thing can be seen in the background. He REALLY didn't like that thing!

, the ET thing can be seen in the background. He REALLY didn't like that thing! Another one that's been going for a while - a single frame of a bald, bearded man popping up in several videos as a Running Gag (see Subliminal Seduction below). It finally comes to a head in Quest for the Game Child: it's YouTube user Mentski , the actor who plays one of the prisoners that beats up Nemesis during the credits

Brief Accent Imitation: Has taken to putting on a John Major-esque "boring nerd" voice when reading out bits of instruction labels, especially those relating to things like safety disclaimers.

British Teeth: He makes fun of this trope in his livestream Q&A. He actually has really nice teeth. (reading question) "Is it true that British people have bad teeth?" ... I don't know. (feels teeth) ... OW! Oh no it's true!

Broke the Rating Scale: In playing the Turbo boardgame with Guru Larry, he manages to come in third place... out of two people playing. Hunger Breaks Hot Pots. He gives the chicken curry a 3 out of 10, but he'd give the beef Bolognese -50 out of a number not understood by humans.

Pub Original Ploughman's Lunch snack. "If I was to rate this on a scale of 1 to 10, I wouldn't bother; I'll just chuck it in the bin and go home."

Buffy Speak: From his Barcode Battler review after he realised the device needed new batteries. "This thing eats batteries like an enormous battery-eating thing ."

In his Deadly 60 blind bag review: "If the item pleases me, it ascends to the Shelf of Interesting Items. If not, it burns in the fires of (beat) a fire."

After picking up some bread twists in the Chinese Delicacy Special: "They're like a knotted-up thing of stuff."

In his Terrible Old Games You've Probably Never Heard Of review of Renegade 3: "Anyway now we've established that Renegade 3 didn't so much jump the shark as repeatedly jump up and down on the shark while screaming 'Look at me I'm Mister Jumpy Shark-o'"

Call-Back: During his first "Video Game Tat" special, Stuart knocks a package onto the sofa, addressed to a "Tom Bishop" starting, well, you know. During the next special, two more letters fall from the sofa, both addressed to a "Tom Bishop". Stuart quickly dismisses both.

Also in the 2014 Easter special. A couple of years before he "decorated" some plastic Easter eggs by daubing "PISS ARSE" on them claiming that they were for Easter (then quickly reversing them to say "ARSE PISS" and declaring that this was now Christmassy). Fast forward to 2014 and after similarly "decorating" a felt bunny with the word "FUCK", Stuart feels it just isn't Easter-y enough... until he turns it around to reveal "PISS ARSE" scrawled on the back.

In the 8th Pop Station Watch episode , Stuart remarked that the only good thing about the Wii U's name was that if you said it repeatedly in a high pitched voice, it'd sound like a police siren. Cue him doing exactly that a year later in his review of the Wii U.

Catapult Nightmare: At the beginning of his "Fortress Guardian" review.

Cluster F-Bomb: In the 2014 Easter Special , one of the items shown is a plush rabbit that comes with felt pens for coloring it. Ashens uses uses the pens to write "fuck" all over it (as well as "piss arse" on the back). Due to the pens being dry, he has trouble writing.

, one of the items shown is a plush rabbit that comes with felt pens for coloring it. Ashens uses uses the pens to write "fuck" all over it (as well as "piss arse" on the back). Due to the pens being dry, he has trouble writing. His review of the Apple Newton has him give one off when he writes in 'Norwich' and it comes out with 'Worcester' instead.

has him give one off when he writes in 'Norwich' and it comes out with 'Worcester' instead. Not to mention his displeasure with the FUCKING INFLATABLE FUCKING CROWN.

Comically Missing the Point: During his review of Chef Excellence's "Stay Fresh System" bread bags, Ashen reads on the box that the bread bags do not require a seal, causing him to think the box is referring to the aquatic mammal.

When reviewing the Ixo Vino wine cork attatchment, he uses it on a cardboard Tesco Value wine carton and declares the product useless before bringing in a proper bottle of San Lorenzo.

While reviewing a Bella Sara blindbag (some All Girls Like Ponies type series), Ashens reads the slogan "Journey into a magical world of horses" on the bag I think we all know what franchise they are trying to cash in on: The Avengers

Complaining About Shows You Don't Watch: In-Universe, in the 2012 Halloween special the Silver Skull reviews a number of horror films sold in Poundland despite not having seen any of them.

Continuity Cavalcade: This video has several Call Backs to previous POP Station videos (his experience with Ben Miller playing the Basketball game with his extreme patience, the presence of cheerleaders in the Football game that don't exist in real European football matches, etc.).

Country Matters: In his Neo Double Games video, he introduces himself as an "Internet Cunt". This is the only swear word that is used in the entire video.

Creepy Uncle: Uncle Stories.

Curse Cut Short: Chef Excellence at the end of "An Excellent Newsflash".

Cuteness Proximity: Whenever he brings one of his pets onto the show, he tends to act especially cute with them, in a weird way—such as looking for his dog, Oscar ("Where's Oscar-dog? There he is!) so he can poke him, or asking his guinea pig if he's going to going to turn into a god-monster. "Yeees! Are you going to go on a rampage? Yeees!"

Cutting the Knot: Almost literally. He uses a pair of bolt cutters on a metal puzzle to untangle it.

Deadpan Snarker: He doesn't hold anything back against the "products" he reviews. Emphasis on the "Deadpan," too, as he's usually extremely calm-voiced during his inferior product reviews. Also accentuates his skill with Precision F-Strikes.

Declarative Finger: Ashens does it often, especially since his own hands get the majority of the screentime.

Deconstruction: Realism Fighter, from Episode 2 of Ashen's Tech Dump.

Disproportionate Retribution: In 10 Reviews in 10 Minutes 5 Ashens reviews a figure of Artie from Shrek the Third, which when triggered says "I don't know anything about being king!". Ashens and Dan decide that because of this Artie is rude and ungrateful, and that the 'sword clashing' sound effect the toy plays is him being beaten to death with a frying pan.

Drinking Game: Dr. Ashen gives one to the viewer in the description of the Barcode Battler video. Ashen: Take a shot every time I say "Right", and "...or something". Alcohol poisoning may ensue.

Dropped a Bridge on Him: A mild example. In the end of POP Station Watch 6 , Chef Excellence makes an appearance as a puppet and Stuart asks him how he is now that he was replaced on the Stay Fresh line. They parted on sour terms. The Chef Excellence puppet did eventually reappear—a better example is the fate of Quincy, the caterpillar who sings obscure Beatles songs.

And now Chef Excellence, this time played by a regular actor instead of appearing as a puppet, is scheduled to appear in Ashen's movie. Dan Tomlinson is playing the Chef.

Drunk with Power: He had a brief power trip after getting his hands on The World's Sharpest Knife (tm). Ashen: I FEAR NO MAN NOW THAT I HAVE THIS IMPERVIOUS LADDER OF STEEL, THIS-THIS GOD OF BLADES, THIS MOTHERFUCKING EXCALIBUR! Come on, my beauty... LET US DEMONSTRATE YOUR OMNIPOTENT POWER AND CLEAVE THIS HIDEOUS EARTH IN TWAIN!!

Dual Wielding: He destroys a pair of shoddy headphones with dual-wielded hammers. He also brandishes the same two hammers and lampshades the trope before destroying a cheap plastic dinosaur skeleton. However the dinosaur was destroyed after one hit so he ended up only using one of the hammers, much to his disappointment.

The dual hammers return once again in order to demolish a dancing Jar Jar Binks. This time they get much more use. Much, much more use.

Dude, Not Funny!: By his own account, he's invoked this again and again and has been keeping track with a checklist . This is mostly concerning how people didn't get jokes such as his repeated avoidance of copyright infringement (Considering the YouTube community's troubled history with copyright), or his appearance on The Node. In his review of the POP Station Laden Vs USA , he was clearly beside himself that such an exploitative product exists and is just another POP Station in no way distinguished from the dozens he had reviewed already.

, he was clearly beside himself that such an exploitative product exists and is just another POP Station in no way distinguished from the dozens he had reviewed already. Once lampshaded by making a joke about Polish people in his Vita review and remarking "Polish people watching are now going 'hmm' and turning this off; sorry!"

Early Installment Weirdness: His tone and joke delivery were duller and far less energetic in earlier videos. Compare his tone in his PolyStation 3 review in late 2007 to the first Poundland Special in 2009 and the infamous Pizza Snack video in mid-2011.

in late 2007 to the first Poundland Special in 2009 and the infamous Pizza Snack video in mid-2011. His first POP Station Watch video used the theme for Crimewatch. Subsequent installments replaced the music with a police siren, since Ashens had started avoiding the use of copyrighted material in his videos. This change has met many complaints, since the siren sound is too loud and annoying. It wasn't until 2015 when Ashens finally replaced the sound with orchestrated music.

used the theme for Crimewatch. Subsequent installments replaced the music with a police siren, since Ashens had started avoiding the use of copyrighted material in his videos. This change has met many complaints, since the siren sound is too loud and annoying. It wasn't until 2015 when Ashens finally replaced the sound with orchestrated music. Fans who were introduced to Ashens later in his career would be a bit shocked watching some of his earlier videos. His bitter and sarcastic British humour is still there, but in general he was calmer, he cursed less, and he was less destructive (no hammers or blowtorch).

His range of content was also a lot smaller. He used to exclusively review electronics, games, or electronic accessories (ex: the Crabble iPhone stand). Later he started doing his Poundland videos where he often reviewed cheap/bootlegged toys and other household items, then he branched out with those videos and started reviewing action figures (justified since way before YouTube he was an action figure collector). Then came the cheap food specials and blind bags, and finally the subscription crates and expired foods. His reviews on electronic items also expanded from bootlegs to also including real electronics both old and new.

Some of his older running gags which are absent from newer videos like Noseybonk, the Godmonster, and Quincy the caterpillar.

His earlier videos occasionally had his pet guinea pigs making cameo appearances but the passing of time resulted in them dying of old age. His go-to pet since then has been Oscar, his poodle.

His very early reviews are very short compared to later ones, sometimes running to less than 3 minutes.

Easter Egg: The strange sound during when he supposedly fell asleep during his R-Zone review. By playing it on a spectrogram, it reveals a picture of Noseybonk . Proof here. On his Guitar Fever review, if you record the screech and play it on a ZX spectrum emulator you get a special message! (Volume warning!) SPLINK!

Eat That: One of his most popular bits is consuming various dubious edibles on camera, and it's one of his most requested ones as well, since his reactions are generally rather dramatic. Favorites include him eating a giant gummi-candy foot, the terrifying "anti-pizza," and generic boxed wine.

His Easter 2012 contains possibly the two extremes of all the "Eat That"s he's ever done: First, there was a "cream egg" so vile, it caused an immediate Spit Take (for which he later apologized, it being rather unprofessional), and a marshmallow bunny that, while it looked horrifying (its eyes were misaligned and it had a random hole in its forehead), he had to admit actually tasted pretty good.

And then came the Chinese Delicacy Special , in which he had a century egg, among other things. Hilarity and Squick ensues.

, in which he had a century egg, among other things. Hilarity and Squick ensues. Averted in a short video where he opens a bag of jelly babies that was 17 years old. The contents had all turned rock hard and were colored like ash. The inside of the babies looked like it had rotted. He doesn't eat it, of course , although a number of commentators theorised they would actually be safe to eat

where he opens a bag of jelly babies that was Whilst reviewing some old packs of unopened Garbage Pail Kids stickers from the mid-1980s, he eats the free stick of gum from one of the packets. It turns to "rotting dust" in his mouth, and he provides a picture of the mixture of tiny bits of bubblegum and saliva he spat out. Ashens: If we've learnt something here today, it's "don't stick 25-year-old bubblegum in your mouth." Whatever makes it bubblegum has long since passed into the ether. He actually nibbled at possibly the ultimate in expired food—a forty-five year-old military ration. The crackers surprisingly weren't that bad. The candy circle on the other hand...

Ashens & Dan eat dead insects . Nothing more than needs to be said.

. Nothing more than needs to be said. Initially defied in The Stinger of his "Worldwide Food" special with Surströmming, a Swedish "delicacy" made from rotten fish. He states he will never eat any, no matter how much he is sent, citing a story about a man who was kicked out of his apartment for opening a can and a friend who had to throw away their carpet and pants after spilling the juice from some on them. In 2018 though, the culinary masochistic doctor finally caved in and tried Surströmming with Barry. And it turns out, the taste actually isn't that bad when properly prepared; it's the smell that's the main bother.

with Surströmming, a Swedish "delicacy" made from rotten fish. He states he will eat any, no matter how much he is sent, citing a story about a man who was kicked out of his apartment for opening a can and a friend who had to throw away their carpet and pants after spilling the juice from some on them. In 2018 though, the culinary masochistic doctor finally caved in and tried Surströmming with Barry. And it turns out, the taste actually isn't that bad when properly prepared; it's the smell that's the main bother. For Christmas 2019, He and Dan each compare what they got in their advent calendars each day, and whoever has the worst item must then eat raw spice from the third advent calendar, which contains 24 packs of spices. Day 13 adds a Kellogs advent calendar with 12 portions of cereal. If the loser can guess the contents of today's door is, he only has to eat the cereal. If he guesses wrong, he has to eat cereal with spices on it.

Eldritch Abomination: Bort Sompson. Referenced in regards to a Fight Club ripoff action figure whose face has been printed wrongly.

Also used when talking about a doll from Poundland. After burning it, of course.

He used the term again when talking about the Bridesmaid doll in the second Poundland Girl's Toys Special. He said it went beyond "Eldritch abomination" and into "harbinger of the apocalypse" levels.

Also, the Interactive E.T. is worse than anything Lovecraft could think of.

The "grass masks" from the 2013 Playmobil Advent Calendar turn out to be shapeshifting versions of this.

Eldritch Location: The ice field from the Turbo board game is depicted as such.

Engrish: If the packaging copy isn't quite written correctly, Ashens will delightfully read it aloud.

Done on purpose with his Mivich 7 "game reviews" on HuHa. See, the "console" came from a Banana Republic...

Epic Fail: His attempts at building a Christmas cracker from a kit set the sofa on fire and reduced him to a gibbering wreck. And that's before he set off all the gunpowder .

. In his review/playthrough of the board game Turbo with Guru Larry, he somehow came in third of two players. note He was beaten to the finish line first by Guru Larry, then by the NPC ambulance of all things.

Every Episode Ending: For Terrible Old Games You've Probably Never Heard Of, each video episode of it ends with Stuart explaining the developer's unlucky fate, followed by him proclaiming "A fitting punishment!".

Everyone Has Standards: He refuses to burn Lego products or knock off products that are very similar to Lego. Even if he's very displeased by it, as seen in his review miniseries on the Lego Star Wars Advent calendar.

Evil Genius: According to Guru Larry and Wez, at least.

Exactly What It Says on the Tin: Terrible Old Games You've Probably Never Heard Of His fake book "Fifty-Thousand Shades of Grey", which is a book that has the phrase "Shades of grey." written 50,000 times.

Eye Scream: When reviewing a knock-off Darth Vader action figure with a light-up lightsaber, Ashen accidentally shines the light in his eye when pressing the button before putting in the lightsaber. He does not take it well.

Filk Song: One of the entries to the non-100th video contest was a four-track album called "Recorded Tat ", which includes theme songs for City Fighter and BMX Ninja.

Foreign Queasine: The feature of the "Chinese Delicacy Special". Particularly the Century Egg. Averted in the "Worlwide Food Special", where at the end he proclaims that he will never try Surströmming due to all of the horror stories he's heard about its incredibly strong smell, one of which came from his friend.

Freeze-Frame Bonus: Stuart enjoys slipping these into his videos. For example, this ◊ image appears in the Apple Newton review (at roughly 3:05.) They're headshots of fellow YouTuber Mentski, whom Ashens is good friends with.

Freudian Slip: Both invoked and lampshaded in his Game King review, upon stating Game Boy games would not work on it. "Oh... I don't know what it is with you people! You're obsessed with sticking things in the wrong slot... hm. Very Freudian." Lampshaded in his Game.Com review, when he accidentally gives away his opinion on the Batman and Robin game before showing it.

In his live stream Q&A when he's about to tell a story: "Years ago when I worked at an orifice, sorry office..."

From Bad to Worse: Frequent in his review of terrible tech.

Fun with Acronyms: The company behind some of the Royal Wedding Tat had the unfortunate acronym PMS. Another one is a company called Tronic Ace Technology Ltd. (TAT)

Fun with Subtitles: The videos with subtitles sometimes describe his actions pejoratively. MOON MEN

Fuzz Therapy: After he gets irritated by the Carpenter headphones in his headset roundup video (see Berserk Button entry above) the video briefly cuts to footage of him playing with poodle puppies accompanied by calming music and the caption "Soothing puppy break".

Genre Savvy: When he is about to play "Apache" in the PSP Station LTPS Handy Game review. Ashen: It won't be Native Americans, it'll be helicopters, I'll bet ya.

Gilligan Cut: After he had opened a package of promotional X-Factor instruments (a whistle, a recorder, and a tambourine), he examines the quality of the instruments, then says "I can't see myself making a musical triptych with these". Cut to exactly that.

A Good Name for a Rock Band: In his "Video Game Tat" video, He holds up a video game case that would reveal an activation code if he hadn't put a fake Lens Flare on top of it, and annotates on video: "'Obscured by Fake Lens Flare' would be a good name for a prog rock band."

From his Matchbox Linkits video: he mentions a figure with undefined limbs as "bumbling along on stumps" which he later adds is also the name of "a really good folk album."

In his Worldwide Food Special he says some low-quality tuna spread tasted like "dirty sea water" which he then states would be a good name for a bluegrass band.

In his review of the 80's Incredible Hulk pop-up book, he says the phrase "exciting punching Hulk" and later says it would be a good name for a death metal band.

In his Deadstone Valley figures review he suggests the name "Fatal Jawbreaker" for a heavy metal band name.

In a variation of this trope, when he finally reviewed Chanticleer Hegemony, he described the game as being more like "Screechy Chicken Nightmare". He then comments that it's a great name for a new branch of KFC.

Inverted in Japanese Seafood Special: The Revenge, in which he says that "a hint of shrimp" is a very bad name for a Heavy Metal band.

In his Astronaut Space Food video with Barry Lewis, he brings up that both "Freeze-Dried Neapolitan Kebab" and "Third Eyebrow" are good names for a prog rock band.

Gosh Dang It to Heck!: Subverted during the Bean Boozled episode when Dan gets a vomit-flavored jelly bean: Dan: Fucking heck!

Guns Akimbo: Mentioned by name when he gives two guns to a knock-off LEGO Star Wars figure and has it dual-wield them.

Harmless Villain: The Silver Skull, as Stuart points out in his checklist. Hideously averted for Noseybonk, however.

Hilarious Outtakes: "Everything Is Always Fine: Violin" is one for his review of the Violin toy. He completely loses it upon reading the Translation Trainwreck rendition of famous violin maker names. In the end, he had cut the video short because he couldn't continue.

Hilarity Ensues: Subverted with the "pooping" cow jellybean dispenser. Ashen: Hilarity does not ensue, I want my money back!

Hypocritical Humor: After the segment where Harry Partridge does a small review in Ashen's style in the "Ultra-Cheap Action Figures" video. Ashen: People appearing in my own videos, trying to steal my shtick... Bet : People appearing in my own videos, trying to steal my shtick... Bet Mike Mozart doesn't have to put up with this.

I Call It "Vera": Mocked- in his Archos Gamepad/JXD 7800B review, he jokingly states that his two arcade cabinets are named "Betsy" and "Bertha". Lampshaded in his "World's Sharpest Knife" review where he compares the titular knife to his bread knife named "Billy". Ashen: (to the viewers) You don't name your bread knives? God you people are weird.

I Have Many Names: The POP Station games often are renamed from one version to the next. Particular note goes to the terrible Street Fighter knockoff, which has been seen in Ashen's videos as: Street Fighter

City Fighter

Street Overlord

Hero in the World

Kinght-Erranf Walk

Tow Heroes Recounter

Super Fighter

Immortal Fighter Ashen(reviewing 3D Color Games): And sure enough there's the same game as ever. And with various titles as ever, and in the top left this is apparently now called "Immortal Fighter", despite being called "Super Fighter" up there [on packaging] and "Pile of Shit" by everybody who's ever played it.

Incredibly Lame Pun: As a reference to the La Di Dah iPhone app's autotune effect, as he was saving his recording to share it, he wondered, "Can I send it to Cher"? Very subtle, but terrible, nonetheless.

The jokes in the Christmas crackers are almost always one of these. Ashen:(reading from joke) "What do hedgehogs have for for lunch? Prickled onions!" What do the people who write these jokes deserve? A knife in the throat! "It looks like a fat Batarang: a Fatarang! Hoohoo! ...Sorry."

I Need a Freaking Drink: After finding out that one of the items he was reviewing was yet another POP Station repackaging, he laments on it: Ashen: Oh, dear...

(After getting the packaging over and done with) Right, I'm going to go have a stiff drink or twenty, then I shall return. : Oh, dear... I'm not looking forward to turning this on. (After getting the packaging over and done with) Right, I'm going to go have a stiff drink or twenty, then I shall return. In the ninth POP Station Watch, he actually has a cheap bottle of gin at the ready on the couch before going over the game.

When he starts to review Williams Arcade Classics for the Game.com, he gathers all of the booze in the house to prepare himself for seeing the system ruin all of the classic games.

Insane Troll Logic: Ashens creates a book called Fifty-Thousand Shades of Grey which contains the phrase "shades of grey" repeated fifty thousand times. He reasons that since Fifty Shades of Grey was so popular, and his book contains a thousand times more shades of grey, then his book will be a thousand times more popular.

Intentionally Awkward Title: Two energy drink brands - "Boobee" and "Pussy".

It's Personal: The games featured in Terrible Old Games You've Probably Never Heard Of are mostly ones which Ashen bought as a child and still feels angry about wasting money on.

Its Pronounced Tropay: In his review of the Gamate he decides that "Ga-mate" isn't a very fun pronunciation so he decides that it should be named "gah-mah-tay".

It Makes Sense in Context: Ashens drinking from a "Boobee" "Squishy boobee! Sticky boobee!"

Joke and Receive: While reviewing a Collector's Edition version of Gears of War 3, Ashen comes across a Cog Medal awarded to "Doctor" Adam Fenix (father of series protagonist Marcus Fenix.) Given that Ashen knows how half the cast of the Gears series are all steroided up bodybuilders, he jokes that "Doctor" Adam is probably just another musclebound Rob Liefeld style giant of a man just like his son but in a white coat...only to find a photo of Adam in the same box and learn that that is exactly what Adam looks like. Just without the lab coat.

Kill It with Fire: His reaction to an incredibly scary looking doll. He seems to have a blowtorch now, as he's "killed" a bad-looking Draco Malfoy figure, an easter chick decoration, a My Little Pony fake, and a Toy Story Woody Gachapon toy with it, along with anything else from a blind bag that doesn't make it onto the Shelf of Interesting Items or into the Drawer of Purgatory.

Killed Mid-Sentence: Sort of. In the Nanodots Review video, at the end after the credits screen, he's messing about with them and using a closeup. "Man, I really hope the magnetic fields from this aren't damaging my camco-*VIDEO ENDS*"

Lampshaded the Obscure Reference: He has a recurring segment in his reviews, "Quincy: a caterpillar that sings obscure Beatles Songs"

After he parodies a quote from The Room he says: "Let's begin a video by quoting an obscure film that most people watching haven't seen!"

Le Film Artistique: The review of the Valentine's Day Frying Pan that Chef Excellence made in the Valentine's Day Tat video. Ashen: Bloody hell. I knew I shouldn't have taken him to see : Bloody hell. I knew I shouldn't have taken him to see The Artist

Let's Play: His general approach towards video game ripoffs.

Letting the Air Out of the Band: He used an 8-bit rendition of God Save The Queen in two videos; it broke down on its second use in the Royal Wedding Tat Review . The Doctor Who LCD Adventure Game review opens with a DIY re-creation of the classic series intro that trails off in the last few seconds.

Limited Special Collector's Ultimate Edition: invoked Has reviewed several limited editions of video games and the tat that comes with them.

Limited Wardrobe: When he films himself, he almost always is wearing a suit with his trademark red tie.

Loads and Loads of Loading: Combined with The Elevator from Ipanema on a few occasions. Thinking about it...thinking about it...thinking about it...

Loophole Abuse: Invoked; an art contest he held had, among its guidelines, "no digital entries". So a contestant mailed him a cassette tape.

Marshmallow Dream: Subverted in his recording on the JVC Marshmallow headset: "Once, I had a dream I was eating a giant marshmallow. When I woke up, my wife was missing and everything was covered in blood!"

Mascot with Attitude: At one point he said that Chef Excellence's Stay Fresh Cheese Bags sounded like the sign-off of an Eighties mascot  "Stay fresh, cheesebags!"

Masochist's Meal: The reviews of terrible processed foods.

Mathematician's Answer: In his Bean Boozled Jelly Beans video: Dan: How do you eat things for a living?! This is horrible!

Ashen: Usually I don't put too much in my mouth but you kind of have to put the whole bean in and chew it a bit...

Matryoshka Object: Lampshaded in his PlayStation 4 unboxing video, referring to the packaging as going "Russian doll on us."

The Mean Brit: Imagine Yahtzee, but about ten times less mean and five times slower. He's certainly not afraid of snarking at all the stupid things the thing he's reviewing got wrong.

Medium Awareness: He notes at the conclusion of his "12 Days of Tat-mas" video series that the Silver Skull is unlikely to make good on his threat to return because "I get bored of recurring characters very quickly".

Metaphorgotten: Sometimes with "If you'd do X" hyperboles, he pulls a Bait-and-Switch and instead states what would realistically happen in that situation. (Referring to a broken solar-powered toy car ) "You could put it on the surface of the sun, and it would melt."

Mondegreen: The Reliable Reindeer from the 2019 Advent Calendar sings "On the first day of Christmas, snow-covered trees I see, and a gift, wrapped for me", but Dan mishears it as "On the first day of Christmas, no cardboard trees I see". On day 10, Dan actually gets a cardboard tree, and he's pissed about it.

Motor Mouth: His talk at Norwich Gaming Festival 2017 about Hareraiser includes a part where he rattles off all the computers Hareraiser was released on (9 of them) in FIVE SECONDS.

Nightmare Retardant: He invoked showed 5 examples as he hosts a website showing old trailers. Examples include puppets, a guy in a wetsuit, and a guy wearing a chicken mask.

Nintendo Hard: BlockBuster from the MB Games Microvision. It's a simple Breakout clone, except with a ball that moves faster than Sonic the Hedgehog on steroids. Ashens: And... go! *The ball shoots to the bottom of the screen in around half a second and beeps* Piss!

No Animals Were Harmed: from the no-money computer building guide : No rabbits were harmed in the making of this tutorial, although I did kick the shit out of a giraffe. The long necked, snooty bastard.

Noodle Incident: "I haven't been this bored since I was trapped in a room with a potato." "I met a man with a metal ball once..."

"Not Making This Up" Disclaimer: In the Human Killing Machine review, when it's revealed that once you defeat Igor, you must fight his dog, who is named Shepski. Does this twice in his Star Wars figure review: once when he mentions that two of Chewbacca's family members are Itchy and Lumpy; and again when he brings up Chewbacca taking up a disguise as a bounty hunter in the Shadows of the Empire saga.

Oddly Named Sequel: Pointed out by the dissonance between Oriental Hero and its predecessor, Ninja Master. Ashen: Leaving aside the Leaving aside the crapulent storyline , we need to take issue with the name. Oriental Hero was clearly written to cash in on the success of Ninja Master, yet completely omits the word "ninja" from the title, thus providing no obvious link.

Oh, Crap!: Done by Chef Excellence in this video , with slightly stronger language.

, with slightly stronger language. Again with "slightly" stronger language when Stuart tries to prepare beer bread with his friend, when he suddenly realises what he left in the oven .

. A silent yet perfect example is when he discovers the packet of utterly revolting Creme Egg knock-offs he has just tried has a goddamn MAGGOT lurking within. Sharp eyed viewers may note it wasn't there before the jump cut. Because it was made of rubber and added during said jump cut by a third party, as confirmed shortly after its discovery

OOC Is Serious Business: Despite his policies, he's so disgusted by the Mega Bloks World of Warcraft figures that he burns them anyway. However this was right after a rant regarding Mega Bloks no longer being a proper construction toy like LEGO. As he demonstrated with the WoW sets: very few interchangeable bricks are used and instead use specially molded pieces based on whatever license it's based on. So he might have just found a loophole in his policy or he considers Mega Bloks too distant from LEGO to be spared from the torch.

Overly Narrow Superlative: "Well, I've never been a particular fan of dehydrated mashed potato that you bring back to life with hot water."

that you bring back to life with hot water." He sometimes says something like "If you ever need X, this will do the job." at the end of a video, X being something rather specific and unlikely. In the aforementioned mashed potato review, he lampshades this: "If that is your situation, you should probably take a long hard look at your life and wonder what the fuck you did wrong." In the Hunger Breaks Chicken Tikka video, he recommends the food to anyone who accidentally kidnapped Liam Neeson's mother, and has Liam Neeson threatening to shoot them in the face if they don't eat one.

Palette Swap: Appears often with the blind bag toys. Stuart himself can't stand when they do this, especially when as filler they would usually have one painted figure available and then the same figure but painted a solid color.

Up to Eleven with four cheap toy vehicle sets which were the exact same vehicles in each set but in different liveries. The sets were; police, fire, military, and construction. Some of these themes made little sense with the included vehicles. (ex: a helicopter and motorcycle in the construction set.)

Panda-ing to the Audience: His Panda Extravaganza , he even says the trope name in the end of the video.

The Password Is Always "Swordfish": One of his guests revealed the password to God's source code. It's Password .

Pet-Peeve Trope: Four Point Scale. invoked "Overall, I give [Karting Grand Prix] 73%. Because I'm a fucking idiot."

Pop-Cultural Osmosis: In two videos , Ashens recognizes a certain theme used in various POP Station games as the Theme Tune for The South Bank Show, a Long Runner of a television series that aims to mix high art and popular culture. In reality, the theme is a Real Song Theme Tune originating from Andrew Lloyd Webber's Variations, which in turn is based on Niccolo Paganini's Caprice No. 24. Likewise, another POP Station plays a badly out of tune snippet of Hello, Ma Baby was recognized by Ashens as the song that Michigan J. Frog sings. The song has been around since the turn of the 20th century.

Power Perversion Potential: In the Ashen's Tech Dump episode "God's Source Code", Ashen interviews a man who found the password to access the universe's source code, essentially allowing him to alter reality with his laptop computer. He uses this power to give Ashen breasts and create a booty party. He ends up crashing the universe and rebooting it, but types "Rebooty" instead of "Reboot", so now the entire universe is one big booty party.

Poke the Poodle: Ashens does this by literally poking his dog, who is a poodle, while checking off a list of tropes on this very page.

Poorly Disguised Pilot: The Illegal Activity Special.

Put on a Bus: Noseybonk and the Godmonster of Indian Flats, once recurring characters from Ashen's early videos haven't reappeared in years. He's explained that there wasn't much suitable footage of the Godmonster in the first place, so maybe he ran out and didn't want to recycle anything. Even Chef Excellence who at a time appeared so often he was practically a Creator's Favorite, rarely appears anymore. Quincy the Caterpillar Who Sings Obscure Beatles Songs was also a recurring favorite, but he was fired for singing a Monkees song instead (presumably he was dropped to avoid the legal hassles, just like the original version of Chef Excellence).

Pyromaniac: Ashen has definitely become one since getting hold of a blowtorch.

Rage Quit: Cadbury's Chocolate Machine Money Box fails to dispense chocolates when Ashen puts some 10-pence coins in. He slams the dispenser into the sofa and tosses it to the floor. "That's my review of that, then." He does try one more time afterwards, however, and he finds out if you insert the coin just far enough into the slot, not only do you get the chocolate, but also you don't actually have to drop the coin into the machine.

Rant-Inducing Slight: He reacts to most of the Newton's handwriting recognition screw-ups with a mixture of amusement and occasional mild irritation, but he gets really annoyed when he writes in his home town of Norwich, and the Newton somehow interprets it as "Worcester."

A Rare Sentence: From his easter tat special: "I'm going to lick a spaniel! There we go, that's something you don't hear on YouTube very often." The first Japanese Seafood Special has this description: "A paste of sea urchin gonads" is not something I ever expected to say. Or taste.

has this description: In the fourth installment of his Game Boy Extravaganza, while playing the "Run! Run! Run!" minigame: "C'mon, wavy stick man with my head!... which is not a phrase I thought I'd be using when I got up this morning."

Reality Is Unrealistic: Regardless of what fictional quirks and oddities he has alluded to for his on-screen persona over the years, they all pale into comparison beside the fact that the real life Ashen apparently keeps Double Dragon arcade boards in his oven.

Reality Warper: His helmet in the second quickest game overs video.

Retraux: His 75,000-subscriber milestone video is a repost of his very first video review . The title screen for "Terrible Old Games You've Probably Never Heard Of" is made to look like the error screen from a Commodore Amiga.

His Matchbox Linkits review features a song meant to sound it it was from the 1980's but was actually recorded in 2011.

meant to sound it it was from the 1980's but was actually recorded in 2011. He occasionally makes "gameplay" videos of fake 8-bit computer games like a Game of Thrones adaption, a Valentine's Day game where the player has to buy the right products to impress their significant other, and of course: Vinnie Vole's Existential Nightmare.

Rewriting Reality: Dr. Ashen meets the man who cracked the Source Code of the Universe in Episode 1 of Tech Dump. Depressingly though, the man was obsessed with spontaneously creating Booty Parties out of thin air.

Rimshot: He does one in the Camp Rock LCD game. Instructions: Shane is trying to write new songs and hears an amazing one that inspires him!

Ashen: So what's he do is sample it and call it Shane is trying to write new songs and hears an amazing one that inspires him!So what's he do is sample it and call it Hip-Hop . Ba-dum tsh!

Schmuck Bait: In a video he made for Bad Teeth (aptly titled *sic* "DO NOT GOOGLE THIS" which talks about Shock Sites - come to think of it, every single site mentioned in the video is schmuck bait in their own accord), he mentions to never search Google for the term "Melon Wedding". If you ignore his warning and do so, google gives you a webpage owned by Ashens that chides you for specifically ignoring him and googling said phrase.

Screw This, I'm Outta Here!: Temporarily, when the Trekking Burger turns out to be an entire hamburger, complete with a bun, in a can. Stuart even jokingly says that the channel is done, because nothing will ever top that.

Seinfeldian Conversation: Lapses into them when dealing with mundane parts of the review (package opening) or intro on whatever is being ripped off.

Self-Deprecation: A very large part of his style. He describes himself as a "Professional idiot" in biography sections of his webpages and social network accounts like Twitter. When pressed for his occupation, he insists he is an internet comedian and never brings up his Ph.D. At the end of his Xbox rip-off review: "Terrifying thought: You have been watching an idiot talking about a broken toy for over ten minutes."

While demonstrating the Seskimo Crabble, his iPhone is playing another video of his which he describes as "some rubbish video made by an idiot."

This exchange with the Silver Skull after the Halloween 2012 special: The Silver Skull: Can the Silver Skull be in more videos?

Ashen: No.

The Silver Skull: Why not?

Ashen: Because you're not funny and nobody likes you.

The Silver Skull: That never stopped you.

Ashen: Good point.

Separated by a Common Language: In one of his Poundland specials, he reflects that Americans say "Legos" rather than "Lego" as the plural: Ashen: Maybe that's where the "S" from the end of "Maths" ended up?

When he mentions football/soccer in his WLL review: Ashen: It's difficult having an international audience which is why from now on my videos will only be available in Estonia... maybe not.

Despite being British he liberally used both "football" and "soccer" while referring to the sport.

He gets confused by the word "ute" (Australian slang for a pickup truck) on the packaging for a set of headphones. He originally assumes it's a German girls' name or a ukulele before finally assuming it might be short for "utility vehicle."

Sesquipedalian Loquaciousness: Chanticleer Hegemony. It wasn't reviewed at the time as it wasn't in the box, but Ashens eventually found out what it was and it isn't half as cool as the game's title . not It's fancy talk for "Cockfighting" ( that , the illegal sport). When he finally did review it, he confirmed that it's a City Fighter clone but with chickens.