If you don’t watch Fox’s hip-hop TV series Empire, you probably don’t know the name of actor Jussie Smollett. But I bet you do now. He’s the openly gay star of Empire who claimed he was the victim of a ‘hate crime’ in Chicago. It allegedly happened in the wee hours of Tuesday morning when two men attacked Smollett after he returned from a Subway shop. Not only that, but the attackers yelled “racial and homophobic slurs” and poured “an unknown chemical substance” on him, according to the police report. The perps also put a rope around Smollett’s neck.

Oh, and the attackers yelled “MAGA,” too. Of course they did.

Here’s ABC News’ most recent take on the Smollett story:

After the story broke, the usual suspects crawled out of the woodwork. Rep. Maxine Waters blamed President Trump, claiming that such attacks “are coming from the president of the United States.” From Hollywood, gay actress Ellen Page sobbed during an appearance on Late Night with Stephen Colbert. Only she blamed Vice President Mike Pence, who “wishes I couldn’t be married,” and then said, “connect the dots. This is what happens.”

Okay. Whatever.

Then on Saturday, Jussie Smollett — the actor and singer most people probably never heard of — returned to West Hollywood as a conquering hero. Performing at the Troubadour, he teared up and told the sold-out crowd:

“I had to be here tonight, y’all. I can’t let [them] win.”

At the end of his set, Smollett announced:

“I’m the gay Tupac! So now, we can do our encore.”

Okay, I’m not sure that anyone should want to compare themselves to a violent rapper who died in a drive-by gang shooting, but, you be you, Jussie. By the way, police never solved Tupac’s murder, which happened over 20 years ago. Kind of like the Jussie Smollett ‘attack’ isn’t close to being solved, either.

If you’ve been scratching your head over this story, you’re not alone. I’ve been skeptical all along about Smollett’s story, although I didn’t want to jump to conclusions — unlike many in the mainstream and entertainment media. But the longer this story plays out, the more bizarre it’s becoming.

For example, when this attack took place — about 2:00 AM on the morning of January 29th — the polar vortex was starting to descend upon Chicago. The low for that day was -9 degrees, and you can bet the wind chill was much lower than that. So we’re supposed to believe that a couple of racists were roaming brutally cold Chicago streets to attack an actor who plays in a series they probably don’t watch. Plus they’re carrying an “unknown chemical” and a rope with them.

Does that sound legit to you? Me neither.

Also consider that this alleged attack happened in the Chicago neighborhood known as “Streeterville.” And even though Chicago is infamous for its high-crime ‘hoods, Streeterville isn’t one of them. According to Niche.com, which rates Chicago neighborhoods for millennials, Streeterville ranks as fifth best in the city. Median rent is nearly $2000 per month, and the median home value is over $500K.

Streeterville, Chicago.

Credit: panoramio.com @ wikimedia commons. Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported.

Niche also notes this:

“Many young professionals and retirees live in Streeterville and residents tend to be liberal.”

Does that sound like MAGA territory to you? Me neither.

But Streeterville has its issues with crime, too. According to one of Smollett’s neighbors, who believes the actor’s story, there’s an area near the entrance to his apartment that’s dodgy:

“I have used the Lower Water entrance a lot. Lots of robberies down there.” “It’s creepy even during the daytime and there are homeless people, creepy looking people down there on a regular basis.”

Plus, according to the neighbor, the building doesn’t even have security guards:

“The building doesn’t have security guards. We have one concierge and I can tell you the night [shift] ones are not always awake. I have friends come visit me and bypass the concierge and I’m like how the f*** did you get up here? Half of them couldn’t tell you what do in case of a fire.”

So perhaps Jussie Smollett was attacked, but by some anonymous homeless men who wouldn’t know who he was, and who certainly wouldn’t yell racial or homophobic slurs. That does sound legit. But wait! there’s more!

According to Rafer Weigel, a reporter for Fox 32 in Chicago, Jussie Smollett still had his sandwich with him after the alleged attack:

#ChicagoPolice source tells @fox32news that #JussieSmollett was seen on surveillance still holding his #Subway sandwich when he returned to the building after the alleged attack. — Rafer Weigel (@RaferWeigel) February 1, 2019

And if you’re a homeless guy outside on a below-zero Chicago night, wouldn’t you take that Subway sandwich?

But fear not! The Chicago police are getting to the bottom of this and will solve it soon. According to Chicago police Superintendent Eddie Johnson:

“We are making gains in the investigation and hopefully we’ll bring it to a successful resolution soon.”

Pardon some of Chicago’s Finest if they’re raising their eyebrows at Johnson’s announcement. For example, Second City Cop, a blog run by an anonymous Chicago police officer, doesn’t buy it. In a post from February 2, Cop reported a couple of detectives who are working the case have concluded:

“It never happened. CPD is wasting hundreds of man hours to solve a Grindr date gone bad. The “victim” is refusing all forms of cooperation, his “ear witness” isn’t cooperating, the Hollywood press is running with a non-existent narrative. The “persons of interest” are all but unidentifiable and left the area 20 minutes before the “attack,” not to mention the anonymous witness who saw a “hillbilly looking” character that not a single camera in a one mile radius has a picture of.”

I’m not sure of what happened, of course, but this case is so deep in the Twilight Zone that I’m definitely not buying the tale Jussie Smollett has spun. Meanwhile, we’re barely into February, and already there are four people shot and killed in Chicago, with another 19 wounded — just for this month. And the 2018 homicide clearance rate clocked in at just shy of 16% solved. But it’s more important to solve an alleged “hate crime” that — like fish — stinks more and more the longer it hangs around. But hey — priorities, right?

Featured image: cropped from pixabay.com. Free for use.