(So why the tux, eh?)

It seems Mother Nature has once again contrived another ingenious method of ridding herself of unsuitable genetic material. This time, it comes in the form of the Men Going Their Own Way, or MGTOW movement. This segment of the population renounces all women, shuns short and long term relationships, and recommends using prostitutes, excessive pornography, and treating women as sex dolls (or just buying actual sex dolls, for that matter).

Their reasoning is that women have brought them nothing but misfortune and distress, that women are categorically inferior to men in nearly every conceivable way, and that relationships with women do nothing but hamper and drain their inherent masculinity.

Sigh, where do I begin?

I suppose at the mythological beginning.

In the story of Adam and Eve, Eve is the first to take of the forbidden fruit in the garden, opening her eyes to her own nudity (vulnerability), and she soon shares the fruit with Adam. This is archaic code for the arising of self consciousness. To know one’s nakedness is to recognize one’s inherent biological fragility. Perhaps Eve took the fruit first because generally, women are indeed more self conscious than men (and often the first to recognize and care for their appearance in early childhood). But soon thereafter, woman gives the fruit of self knowledge to man, and he takes it.

(The fruit of self knowledge, offered by the feminine, coiled in the serpent, perfect representation)

As a man, there is perhaps nothing truer. Men do tend to become self conscious later on, and it often is the result of their interactions with women.

Human females are highly sexually selective, and that means that if a woman feels a man’s genes aren’t up to snuff, she may occasionally tolerate his presence, but she certainly won’t assist him in propagating them. This is a catastrophic defeat to a man’s self esteem, when he realizes that the woman he desires, and perhaps even idealizes, wants little or nothing to do with him sexually. Soon thereafter, a man’s ego becomes fragile, self conscious, and keen to his own inadequacy. True to form, the story goes on to point out that when questioned about having taken the forbidden fruit, rather than owning the responsibility of his own choice, man immediately shifts the blame his sin to the woman.

Bingo. Nailed it right on the head.

This is precisely what the MGTOW movement is up to. It’s comprised of men who have had a checkered past with women, and, not knowing how to integrate their failures and grow from them, blame the opposite sex for their lack of self esteem and romantic and social misfortunes. As such, these men decide to “go their own way”, embrace their celibacy as a badge of honor, and denounce more than 50% of the population as unworthy of existence.

(More serpent imagery, hmm.)

Even so, these men truly have not gone their own way. The entire movement, consciously or otherwise, is completely fixated on women. You would think MGTOW lore would have some other traditions, rules, or tenets outside of the renunciation of females (perhaps hunting, archery, or being out in the wilderness?) but no. The sole defining characteristic of a member of this unofficial cult is contempt for the opposite sex. If you only use women for sex, or solicit prostitution, you’re MGTOW. If you masturbate exclusively, or use sex toys or dolls, you’re MGTOW. If you’re completely celibate, and denounce even the thought of female company you’re MGTOW.

Now, while it’s always harmful for an individual to base their entire sense of identity on disdain for a particular group, be it a religion, ideology, or gender, this particular brand of pathology isn’t quite as dangerous as say, third wave feminism, partially because it’s significantly less popular (thank goodness). And, if a certain proportion of reproductively unsuccessful men feel it’s their duty to abstain from contributing to the gene pool, then that’s their right. Perhaps such men aren’t exactly ideal candidates for fathering the next generation of humankind anyway.

However, I can’t help but feel more than a twinge of empathy for such misguided males, who’ve been encouraged to despise what it is that they most desire; female attention. I can’t help but dislike the thought of so many men feeling like they are doing themselves, and the planet at large a favor by refusing to even try to reproduce or engage with women at all. So, in defiance of that thought, here comes my preachy, potentially paternalistic, and probably unheeded spiel.

Men, if a woman rejects you, don’t take it personally. If five, ten, or even twenty women reject you successively, don’t take it personally. However, if this is a recurring theme across contexts, and nearly every woman you express interest in dismisses you, then women aren’t the problem, it’s you. Other people are not your enemies. The judgment of the crowd is meant to be used as a barometer for the validity and sustainability of your behaviors and attitudes. If you’re rejected en mass, it’s not a sign of your superiority, (that’s what the Columbine kids thought) but rather a signal that you’re doing something seriously wrong.

Similarly, if women reject you en mass, that’s your cue to check within and see what about you needs retooling. Humans organize themselves into hierarchies, and women aren’t interested in those they consider beneath them, so if you aren’t experiencing the success with women that you would like, it’s a sign that you’re not the man you could be. I mean that as literally as I possibly can. Grow the hell up, stop blaming women for noticing your inadequacies, and do something to fix them. If you’re not as socially sophisticated as you could be, change that. If you’re not in as great of physical shape as you know you ought to be, then work on it. If you’re not as financially independent as you would like to be, then improve that. There are probably ten different things that you don’t like about yourself, that you know you would change, that you could change. So before you go disparaging the opposite sex for not “appreciating” you, ask yourself.

Would you fall for you?

It should be a rule that before you even begin to look for anyone you might be interested in, that you first become the kind of person that you might find intriguing. No woman is going to settle for you if you wouldn’t be willing to settle for yourself. Nor should she. The fact that human females are as fickle as they are when choosing mates is a blessing. It means that only those that have actualized their potential, or are at least currently striving to achieve just that, are worthy of their attention, and that impetus has made humanity the most successful and powerful species on the planet.

No, shying away from female judgement does not make you superior.

No, avoiding long term commitments does not make you superior.

No, ejaculating into plastic does not make you superior.

If you can’t handle the challenge of attracting feminine attention, allowing a woman into the most intimate portions of your life, and committing to building a future together, you should at least admit that yourself, rather than denigrating those who choose to take the one of the bravest leaps of their lives to get married. If you can’t be with a woman for more than ten months without feeling like she’s a drain on your masculinity, then perhaps you need more masculinity.

No more excuses. No more finger pointing. No more self deception.

Set your damn life in order before blaming anyone or anything else.