Canada's Supreme Court unanimously struck down anti-prostitution laws today. A year from today, it might be 100 percent legal to be a prostitute in Canada if Parliament can't draft new legislation in time.

And, boy, Toronto City Councilor Giorgio Mammoliti is not happy about it. Or maybe he's really happy about it. Because he wants to create -- get ready -- Whore Island. Really.

An actual Whore Island.

Whore Island.

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Mammoliti put out a press release today entitled -- once again, get ready -- "I TOLD YOU SO, I TOLD YOU SO, I TOLD YOU SO, I TOLD YOU SO…. I guess I'm not crazy after all."

(That guess would be incorrect, by the way.)

The press release urges the federal government to make a law that banishes all sex workers to a chain of islands behind the airport where they can… hike? Fish? Bike? Who knows, but they can't receive money for sex.

I know what you're thinking: Didn't they do this to Napoleon a couple of times and that turned out really badly?

Wait, that's not what you're thinking? You're thinking, "Is this island available for private parties?"

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Well, let's outline the amenities first. Centreville, the de facto town square of the Toronto Islands, features hooker-friendly activities such as a miniature railway, a children's garden, and a course for every prostitute's favorite sport -- disc golf.

But you can't bring your car there, so you're gonna have to do your funny business in one of the 300 residential homes still occupying the islands, or the woods, like the olden-times.

Toronto is governed by children. Merry Christmas, everybody!

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