Ever since Broad City thrusted pegging (you're welcome) into the public conversation, lots of ladies have been more interested in strapping one on and giving it a go. The term "pegging" became the go-to descriptor for a woman performing anal sex on a man by penetrating him a strap-on dildo when it beat out both "bob" and "punt" in a 2001 naming contest on Dan Savage's "Savage Love" sex advice column. Despite its increasing popularity, there still remains some mystery, confusion, and stigma around pegging, so Cosmopolitan.com spoke with several adult film stars to get their tips on how to make pegging the most pleasurable ~on-trend~ sexing of all time. Do enjoy!

1. Go slow. Adult performer and BDSM consultant for Showtime's Submission, Aiden Starr, says the key to good pegging is taking things nice and slow. "It's important to remember that we all liked to be warmed up before sex, and guys do too!"

2. Quality counts. Adult film star and director, Chanel Preston, the host of Naked with Chanel, shares that a quality strap-on is essential. "There are a lot of low quality strap-ons, and quality makes a big difference in the bedroom. If the strap-on does not fit right and is not comfortable, then it will be difficult to use, and you could end up hurting your partner."

Starr echoes this tip. "Choosing toys is important. The girl gets to pick the harness. It should fit well and make her feel sexy. The guy gets to pick the dildo and the lube. Hey, it's his hole! Some people prefer a softer toy and some a harder one. Keep an open mind and experiment until you find the right mix that works for both of you."

We do it doggy-style in films because it looks better on camera. That doesn't always translate to real life.

3. If at first you don't succeed, try, try again! Preston told Cosmopolitan.com that there's a learning curve to pegging, and if you experiment and give it a few tries, odds are you'll come out a winner. "The shape and size of the dildo matters! Everyone is different and likes different types of dildos, so if you and your partner have tried dildos and did not like it, consider changing the shape. Some people love ridges. Some people hate ridges and want a smooth surface. Others want a tapered dildo or even dildos that look like the real deal." She also advises considering the material carefully: "Cheap dildos can sometimes burn and also tug on the skin. When you find your perfect dildo, strap-on play will be much more enjoyable!"

4. Start with what you know. Lance Hart, adult film star and owner of PervOUT.com — and the co-producer of Sssh.com's upcoming film, Empowering Ava: A Virtual Reality Experience, which features him in a VR pegging scene — says, "It's best to start on your back, like missionary. For most men it's easier to relax when you can see your partner being all sexy."

He elaborates, "Most people are surprised they don't like being pegged doggy-style because they are pretty much just looking at a wall while being butt-rammed. It's amazing how much better it feels when you can see your partner. We do it doggy-style in films because it looks better on camera. That doesn't always translate to real life."

5. You don't have to put on a show. "I've taught more women how to peg guys than I can count," Hart shared with Cosmopolitan.com. "Many of the women I work with have never done it before. Often those are the best. I always tell them to just be themselves. Don't worry about trying to make porn faces and moan. That's kinda ridiculous when you think about it. You can't feel it. The guy knows that. If it's funny to you, then laugh. If you wanna call him a slut and ask him how it feels to get fucked, great! You gotta keep in mind that your dude has probably fantasized about this for a long time, and the first experience may be surreal and vulnerable for him. I'd hope he shows you the same mutual respect."

Getting relaxed enough to take things up the butt requires patience.

6. Patience, communication, and consent are key. Performer, camerawomen, and writer for Sssh.com, Ava Mir-Ausziehen, shares that "ass play takes time." She suggested to make sure you're both comfortable and relaxed, as the anus responds to emotional stress by clenching.

"Getting relaxed enough to take things up the butt requires patience. Over time, people may become more skilled at quickly creating a good atmosphere for penetration, but [the] first [few] times should be undertaken when you are not feeling rushed," she explains.

"Good communicative skills are also very important for anal play," she continued. "Listening means being non-defensive, honoring what someone is telling you at face value, and communicating your concerns respectfully."

Jessica Drake agrees. The adult performer and sex educator says communication goes beyond saying, "I wanna put it in your ass," right before putting it in their ass. "This is a thoughtful conversation about what both of you want from this experience. It is also checking in with your partner during and after, the same way they would hopefully be doing with you, and always honoring their feedback."

7. Cleanliness is super important. Mir-Ausziehen gets real: "[Poop] comes from your butt. It's what happens when you eat stuff, your body pulls out all the yummy parts, and gets rid of the rest. So really, poop is just food byproduct, but I'm not going to say, 'Hey, it's poo, just get over it already,' because people have very real anxieties around shit as being dirty and disgusting," she shares. In addition to being turned off by the smell, she mentioned that there are health factors to consider, including the transmission of hepatitis A.

Lube is your best friend.

"To have poo-free ass play, try to time your experiments on days when your partner has had a nice, solid bowel movement," Mir-Ausziehen told us. She also recommended perhaps trying a natural, chemical-free enema beforehand, but, as always, be sure to consult your doctor before undertaking any medical advice.

8. Lube is always your friend! As Drake says, "Let me say this extra loud for the people in the back: LUBE IS YOUR BEST FRIEND.You cannot have too much. Whatever you're inserting anally, use a lube like Wicked Sensual Care's Anal Jelle, a super-thick, water-based lube to provide a cushion while protecting that delicate area from being torn. Also, no numbing agents. Pain is your body's way of letting you know something is wrong, so if anal penetration hurts, slow down. Relax, use more lube, or take a break."

9. Don't play the shame game. Drake shares why shame around pegging has got to stop. "It's unfortunate that I have to mention this, but sometimes when I'm giving anal workshops, I'm approached by men who are concerned that anal play means they are secretly gay. I've also heard of women holding it against their partners down the line. We just can't feed into this any longer. Gay is great, and just because you enjoy it when your wife fingers your ass, it doesn't mean you are gay. You just like prostate stimulation."

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Laura Beck Laura Beck is a Los Angeles-based TV writer and frequent contributor to Cosmopolitan.com — her work has appeared in the New York Times, New Yorker, Jezebel, and the Village Voice.

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