The man he’d denounced so vigorously during the campaign, he added, had “a message of inclusion and bringing people together, and his vision is something which obviously connected with the American people in a very powerful way.” If you had asked Romney at that moment what he thought about Trump University, he’d probably have announced plans to enroll.

But then, whammo. He was passed over for Rex Tillerson, the C.E.O. of Exxon Mobil, who seemed to pop up out of nowhere. Trump was reportedly moved by recommendations from Republican luminaries like former Defense Secretary Robert Gates and former Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice. Rice and Gates have a consulting firm that counts Tillerson’s company as a client, but that had nothing whatsoever to do with their miraculous, totally coincidental and spontaneous decisions to drop his name.

Roger Stone, a political consultant who frequently presents himself as a Friend of Trump, told a radio talk show host that the whole wooing of Mitt was just an effort to “torture” the former presidential candidate. Another theory is that Romney’s problem was a failure to apologize for those campaign insults.

It’s possible. Romney did once write a book called “No Apology.” However, given his track record, a better title might have been “No Apology Normally, Unless Something Else Happens.”

Should we feel sorry for him? He’d have been a more qualified pick than Tillerson. But really, Romney has been such a jerk during this election that it’s hard not to giggle.

He made a huge, dramatic profile in courage out of his refusal to support Trump, but he didn’t have the spine to say that he’d be voting for Hillary Clinton. Instead, Romney straddled that swamp masquerading as moral high ground where he rejected everybody, took no responsibility for anybody, and therefore was no help at all.

Then, when the man he denounced as a fraud got elected, Mitt was instantly in the employment line, grinning and blowing kisses. Suddenly we were reminded of all the years of political shape-shifting, when Romney’s opinions on everything from gun control to health care changed with every twitch of the polls.

And, of course, he’s the guy who once drove to Canada with the family Irish setter strapped to the roof of the car. The worst part was his excuse — not “too many kids in the back seat” but “my dog loves fresh air.” Somewhere, the spirit of Seamus is laughing.