Whenever I get my chunky thighs and fat ass into a swimsuit, it's over for you hoes!

No, but seriously. The sun is starting to peek out, and the time is now to start trolling the internet for the perfect suit for me and my curves to snag a summer fling. For too long we've been regulated to bathing suits that are effectively a nun's habit. But when the sun comes out, so do I.

Here are the best bathing suits for treating your best assets this beach season:

A black one-piece was the standard for fat women—but you’re not standard, girl

Remember when all fat girls would wear to the community pool was a boring-ass black one-piece with a muumuu/cover-up to match?

Most plus-sized swimsuit offered only one feature (aside from the obvious water-proof-ness, duh): it must minimize, it must conceal. A fat woman could never dare be happy with her body, right? Because of course it's something to be ashamed of, riiiiight?

Yeah, fuck that. It's 2018, and I know I'm hot.

The time is now to pick a sexy suit that shows off everything you've got

Nowadays, social media and its influencers have banned together to make women way more comfortable exhibiting their bodies online and IRL — and it’s started a fat hoe revolution. People like Tess Holiday have been fat-shamed all their lives, but now she purposely poses half-naked on the 'gram because she knows it'll anger her haters.

And we can do the same thing at the pool, the beach, and our TL.

??? Do it for The Graham ??? A post shared by Gabi (@gabifresh) on Feb 14, 2018 at 7:23am PST

Gabi Gregg is one of my biggest inspirations because she lays it all out on the table—as should you. She's got a body that's not far from the standard plus-size girl and she's unashamed and unabashed by her fabulous FUPA.

Even body positive activist Manon Marchetti Edwards says in a post that uncomfortable she used to be wearing just a size 12. "It was such a nightmare! I was so stressed, worried about what people will might think about me," she said. "But nowadays I realize how much it’s so AWESOME to not have these kind of feeling anymore!"

Even Danielle Brooks from Orange is the New Black has shed all of her insecurites, posting her own sexy thicc thighs on Instagram in her suit from Swimsuits for All.

And we can't forget all of the women who they've inspired to put their rolls on blast for the world to see

They're hot, right? When the media allows and encourages women to be ourselves and not feel guilty about the skin we're in, it makes us more at ease, in tune with ourselves and more confident in everything we do. Everyone wants to feel sexy, and we deserve to.

However, now is the time for plus-size girls to become a Summer sexpot and these swimsuits are the solution

It was clear the retail industry believed (well, believes) fat women were a sin, and didn’t have a reason to be sexy. While that’s changed a bit over the past 10 years, the search for sexy swimsuits is still a bit of a struggle.

However, I’ve discovered a few that’ll make every head at the pool turn — and for everything bigger body type, too:

Boohoo's 'Plus' Keely Broderie Anglaise Bandeau Bikini

For my ladies with tinier tots, try going completely strapless with this bandeau bikini. It's sweet and simple, but it's a swimsuit guaranteed to score you numbers at the swim-up bar. If you're ready to break hearts you can buy it here.

Marbella Swimsuit from Fashion Nova

Now this is what I'm talking about when I say it's over for all ya'll. Fashion Nova's Marbella swimsuit is the one piece that will literally have your DMs filled the second your post finishes uploading. Get it here to bare your saggy boobs and butt in all its cellulicious glory.

The Nohea from Adore Me

This piece is all about letting the girls on top have the spotlight. Adore Me's Nohea bathing suit has a high-waisted bottom for some muffin top control, but the suit's top cages your boobs with an Egyptian-inspired neckline. It'll be perfect for you and your melons to stun every girl chilling on their tanning bed. Get it here.

ASOS CURVE Mesh Insert Halter Swimsuit

If you're the kind of gal who likes to tease to point of cardiac arrest, then this suit is calling your name. While it's not as risqué as all the other suits on this list, the simple mesh cut out is just enough for max appeal. If you're ready for it, you can spend your rent money here.

Try Me Swimsuit from Fashion Nova

You might as well be naked if you're typing in your debit card digits to purchase this baby. Unfortunately, nude beaches are hard to come by and you'll have to settle for this "Try Me" suit from Fashion Nova. But don't fret, everyone by the poolside will definitely want to try you when you display your glistening wet body in this sexy suit.

Ashley Graham X Swimsuits for all's Fes Swimsuit

While you've probably just spit out your midday coffee at the level of this hotness, you'll be even more surprised to know that this bathing suit is actually a one piece. It literally puts every curve on display from back to belly. I'd wear this on the beach and in the bedroom, honestly.

We may still be freezing our asses off in this bitter bitch called winter, but when the heat finally starts to set in, bring the curves out of hibernation and get to trapping.

Related stories recommended by this writer:

● We investigated those shady online clothing stores, and here are the ones worth your time

● I’m calling it: This is the bathing suit you’re going to see all over the beach this summer

● Sports Illustrated got its first Black, plus-size swimsuit model and she’s so damn hot

@aribines