SOUTH BURLINGTON – With the loss of its only international flight, the Burlington International Airport, located in South Burlington, is being forced to change its name. The directive to adjust the name came directly from Governor Scott, who felt that the largest airport in the state should not welcome tourists and visitors by lying to them. After some deliberation, the airport has opted for the name “Burlington Intranational Airport.”

“We feel that this name will make the easiest transition for people,” said director of aviation Gene Richards. “We considered things like ‘Burlington Regional Airport’ or ‘Burlington Interstate Airport,’ but after a long series of discussions, we decided that most people don’t don’t what ‘intra’ means, and will probably not even notice the change.”

The Winooski asked several Vermonters about the name change, and most were of the opinion that they did indeed not notice.

“So what’s th’ change?” asked Errol Blaine, of Milton. “Bur’ing’n In’r’nashn’l Airpor’. Sounds th’ same t’me.”