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The Last Days of Musk

00:00 - 00:03 Sales have slowed to a trickle.

00:04 - 00:05 We had zero deliveries this week at Littleton,

00:05 - 00:07 Scottsdale, Tyson's Corner, and even at Marina Del Rey.

00:08 - 00:12 Inventory lots in Fremont are overflowing.

00:12 - 00:15 There is no room for more cars.

00:17 - 00:19 Maybe we should shut down our stores

00:19 - 00:21 and sell our cars online only.

00:24 - 00:26 Mein disruptor...

00:27 - 00:28 Ahuja...

00:31 - 00:33 CFO Ahuja has resigned.

00:34 - 00:36 He is talking to the SEC right now.

00:53 - 00:58 Everyone who doesn't know The Secret, get out.

01:13 - 01:15 It wasn't supposed to happen this way!

01:15 - 01:17 I had the shorts where I wanted them.

01:18 - 01:23 They were laughing at Chanos.

01:25 - 01:28 I sent Einhorn short shorts.

01:29 - 01:31 Now he's going to send me long johns.

01:31 - 01:34 We need to fight the SEC in court

01:34 - 01:37 They are a bunch of weak pedos.

01:37 - 01:40 They will fold under the stare of Dane Butswinkas.

01:40 - 01:42 Mein disruptor, Dane Butswinkas has resigned.

01:42 - 01:46 Then get me John Hueston!

01:46 - 01:48 Mein disruptor, we should file for Chapter 11 immediately.

01:48 - 01:52 You always say that, Murdoch.

01:53 - 01:54 You just want to be CEO!

01:56 - 01:57 There is another way.

01:57 - 02:00 We will shut down our stores and lay off half the workers

02:00 - 02:03 and we'll sell our cars below cost,

02:04 - 02:08 but sell each one three times.

02:08 - 02:13 The stupid Europeans will pay full price in advance.

02:14 - 02:16 And we will collect the sweet, sweet subsidy money.

02:17 - 02:21 We must get an S-3 through the SEC, but they keep stalling.

02:27 - 02:29 We can do this if you follow my leadership, my comrades.

02:30 - 02:34 I am your Lord and Savior, Elon Musk.

02:34 - 02:36 The Most High Genius and Disruptor.

02:41 - 02:42 All I ever wanted was to be adored by everyone.

02:43 - 02:47 But daddy told me I wasn't good enough

02:48 - 02:53 and I know mommy loves Kimbal more.

02:54 - 02:56 I made electric cars cool

02:56 - 02:59 and I landed rockets on barges

03:00 - 03:02 but still they print lies about me in the LA Times!

03:04 - 03:07 Don't worry Gerda. General Motors is hiring.

03:14 - 03:16 Maybe it's time for the Final Solution.

03:19 - 03:23 Humanity must be saved.

03:25 - 03:26 I will go to Mars.

03:31 - 03:33 I will hide inside Ripley.

03:40 - 03:46 Tell dad I tried my best

03:46 - 03:49 and tell mom I'm sorry.