#806893 +( 3422 )- [X] <+TheUltra4sshole> I mean, we started 2 nights before, recruiting strippers to show up

<+TheUltra4sshole> things got out of hand, and we end up with 10 kegs, and who knows how many imported sluts

<+TheUltra4sshole> I'm not talking tundra wookies

<+TheUltra4sshole> I mean, decent-looking chicks

<+TheUltra4sshole> they'd ranks a 6 or 7 here, but are fucking TEN in alaska

<+TheUltra4sshole> party goes awesome

<+TheUltra4sshole> don't catch any of the game

<+TheUltra4sshole> we all pass out by about 3 am

<+TheUltra4sshole> first call is at 6 am

<+TheUltra4sshole> and being professional alcoholics, we rigged the central firealarm to go off 10 minutes before first call

<+TheUltra4sshole> well, we all wake up to the fire alarm, clean the shithole up, then go down to PT formation

<+TheUltra4sshole> just expecting a 10-mile detox run or something gay like that

<+TheUltra4sshole> 1SG says we're having a health and welfare inspection

<+TheUltra4sshole> where he goes through everbody's room and fucks you up for anything that's out of place

<+TheUltra4sshole> well... we had 10 empty kegs and a buncha passed out whores in our building...

<+TheUltra4sshole> not to mention the little shit like bottle caps and whatnot

<+TheUltra4sshole> thank GOD he went to consolidated barracks first, so we had about an hour to get everything cleaned up

<+TheUltra4sshole> you wanna talk about a buncha men working as a team...

<+TheUltra4sshole> we had the buffer going, you heard nothing but vacuums, sweeping, mopping, and calls for the medic to get a hooker with an IV

<+TheUltra4sshole> pure mayhem

<+TheUltra4sshole> we get all the sluts out of our own rooms, and since the dayroom only had a little bit of furniture and we can work on it together, we all hit it at once

<+TheUltra4sshole> well...there was one chick left over

<+TheUltra4sshole> still passed out, topless in a leather skirt

<+TheUltra4sshole> when we heard CQ on the first floor call "AT EASE!"

<+TheUltra4sshole> fucking panic

<+TheUltra4sshole> Aubaugh, being the smart crazy jew he was, stole a buncha rappelling gear from mountaineering

<+TheUltra4sshole> tied her passed-out ass up in a swiss-seat

<+TheUltra4sshole> (mind you, she was wearing JUST a skirt, and a swiss seat goes between the legs)

<+TheUltra4sshole> tie the 120 to the center pillar, tied her figure 8 off in a bowline, and pushed her out the window

<+TheUltra4sshole> she hung there for FORTY FIVE FUCKING MINUTES

<+TheUltra4sshole> We pass the inspection

<+TheUltra4sshole> BUT

<+TheUltra4sshole> as 1SG was walking out of the barracks, he walked around the outside looking for cigarette butts and caught us hauling her naked ass back in the window...

<+TheUltra4sshole> Fail

<+TheUltra4sshole> we had such a good chance to get away with it...

<+TheUltra4sshole> man was that a long week for charlie company, 2-1 infantry