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You have to stretch your neck and spin your head around to even try to grasp Brendan Miniter‘s reasoning in his Wall Street Journal column of yesterday. Miniter writes that there is a connection between gay marriage and the rise in out-of-wedlock births in the U.S.

What? Okay, Miniter has an explanation for this assertion, right? Wrong. He claims that “Although advocates of same-sex marriage will deny there is any connection…” between gay marriage and increased out-of-wedlock births, he does not utter a word about why there would be such a connection.

Miniter says that, according to reports from the National Center for Health Statistics, teen pregnancy is down, but more unmarried women in their 20s and 30s are having children. The only possible related explanation, of course, is that those women are lesbians and that they are in gay marriages. However, very, very few gay Americans are married, since gay marriage is rarely permitted. And lesbians and gay men who want children have children, regardless of whether they are fortunate enough to be married (if that is what they choose).

So add to marriage to family members and children and marriage to dogs and cats, an increase in out-of-wedlock births if gay marriage is permitted. And I’ll add some: divorce, spousal abuse, child abuse, and infidelity. Oh, wait…we already have those.