[worry not your little selves silly, you gloriously sane people who are, like me, immune to Sandersonitis. I am addressing the Insane Freaks here, not you (hide spoiler)

slightly

[don't worry, you're not really lovely. Or dear to me. This is a just an attempt to ward potential Sanderson Trolls off (hide spoiler)

slightly

awesome

[well, not really, just pretending here. For the sake of appearances and all that crap (hide spoiler)

worshipped, fangirled over, shamelessly seduced, boom! kidnapped, and stashed away in my high security harem for later use

and I am immune to the deadly virus that is, even Schwarzy is in shock. I guess that's what happens when you come acrosson this silly planet who do not lose their silly senses the minuteis mentioned. Yes, you Freaks, I just called your Lord and Master SILLY. Go ahead and unleash yourupon me. And watch mewith fear. Andwith total, complete, utter horror.beneath this delightfully rhythmic gif? Oh, I see. I have to spell it out for you.This very cleverly hidden meaning is:. You can all unfriend, block and behead me; cut me to tiny pieces andif that makes you happy. I don't care. Your Freaky Cult is aand I have made it my mission to tell the world about it. Well. Itbe that your Freaky Cult isa total fraud and thatsomething while reading this book. The thing is, we all know I amto have missed anything here. Guess what that means?. And How! What a bunch of deceitful people you are. Trying towith your malignant virus. Attempting to convincearound the globe that Awesome Sanderson is Awesome. Such. Proselytism doesn't become you,, now that I havethat you are nothing but a, let's try and expose thishere.{insert collective screams of dismay and outrage here}. I didn't DNF it because my Dear, Lovely Sanderson Freaks (DLSFs™) (view spoiler) were expecting me to. And Ithan give them the satisfaction of being right. But anyway. Where was I? Oh, yes!. But it's not Mr Sanderson's fault {insert collective sighs of relief here}. Of course not. I mean, it wouldn't be fair for me to blame him when his only fault is tothe meaning of the word "." And since I am such agirl (view spoiler) , I shall give Dear Mr S. a crash course here:for this book is 541 pages long. And that is 151.48 pages. Shave off 28% of the book (yes Dan, I got the maths right this time), and I'm pretty sure itawesome.{insert collective screams of dismay and outrage here}, it's insane. Not as insane as you, DLSFs™, but almost. The idea ofis absolutely BRILLIANT. I (for once) bullshit you not. Mistborns. Mistings. Obligators. Creepy Steel inquisitors…. The oppressed vs oppressors/rebels vs tyrant plot is one of the most unoriginal ever, but the world itself? Prettycool. The execution, however…. Because the "my name is Brandon S. and I don't know what '' means" issue. Because the "my name is Brandon S. and I don't know what '' means" issue. And because the "my name is Brandon S. and I don't know what '' means" issue.{insert collective screams of dismay and outrage here}but you don't write a supposedly ADULT book and fill it to the brim with(FTJN™). Vin might-maybe-who-knows-there-are-miracle-sometimes become a pretty cool character one day, but right now she is nothing but ateenager, withteenage ramblings,teenage behavior, and ateenage crush. Bloody hell. I eyerolled so much while reading all this silly crap I. When you think of the life this silly girl has supposedly endured, she should behave like anor something. But no, not Vin.. Threaten all you want, my DLSFs™,. Instead of wasting his time onhere (view spoiler) , Mr S. should have focussedhis attention oncharacters. Like, I don't know,for example. Sigh. So many pages spoilt with Vin Silliness. When (view spoiler) , waiting to beadmired from afar. This is just NOT done, Mr S. Has no one ever told you that, Mr S.?{insert collective screams of dismay and outrage here}That was soof you, Mr S. I mean, who would expect to suffer awhile reading a supposedly-but-not-really-because-it-is-all-a-fraud awesome FANTASY thingie?. Did I already tell you that some things were just NOT done? I guess I did. But you just will not listen! Because, SERIOUSLY?, BALLS, BALLS??!!, GOWNS, GOWNS??!!, HANDKERCHIEFS, HANDKERCHIEFS??!! AND, LUUUURRRRRVVVVE, LUUUURRRRRVVVVE???????????????!!!!! Repeat after me: FRAUD FRAUD FRAUD. SCAM SCAM SCAM. RIP-OFF RIP-OFF RIP-OFF. It's aI finished this supposedly-but-not-really-because-it-is-all-a-fraud awesome thingie and am, DLSFs™ whom I am not afraid of,⚠️for you, DLSFs™: the(FUFSC™) is attracting more members every day! Theis coming! Theshall not prevail! Theare making their voices heard! The Immunes shall(aka you)! We shallto you, DLSFs™: you might havebook taste but I still *whispers* (view spoiler) .["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>