Broward County Brings In Expert Consultant To Speed Up Ballot Count

FLORIDA—Broward County, which has had trouble meeting its legal deadlines in the counting of ballots, has now brought in a consultant to speed up the recount: counting expert Count von Count.

The Count wasted no time and immediately began counting as soon as he saw the ballots. He picked up one and said, “One vote for governor, eh eh eh.”

After that, he picked up a second ballot and said, “Two votes for governor, eh eh eh.”

Next, he picked up a third ballot and said, “Three votes for governor, eh eh eh.”

“Wow!” exclaimed Broward County official Stanley Collier. “He’s way faster than us!”

The Count continued his tabulation and within a minute was in double digits. “I always get confused once I reach the number nine,” said Brenda C. Snipes, the Supervisor of Elections for Broward County, “but he blew right through that.”

With the help of the Count, Broward County now expects to have an official total sometime in late 2019.



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