Dan Meth / Via BuzzFeed

In The Little Mermaid, Ariel's biggest problem is the fabulous drag-queen like octopus, Ursula. But if mermaids actually evolved to live in the sea then Ariel's story would take a very different turn.

"[Mermaids] would most likely have dorsal fins sticking out of their backs. Think of dolphins. Also, the arms would be fin-like or gone. There is not much use for hands in the open ocean. Further, their noses would be on the tops of their heads. And finally, they would be hairless, so no flowing locks," University of California, Irvine evolutionary biologist Bradford Hawkins, Ph.D., told BuzzFeed over email.

Unless Prince Eric is into "alternative" looks, then it looks like he's ain't gonna kiss the girl.