Today is the first Monday after CUNA’s annual Governmental Affairs Conference, or GAC, in Washington, D.C. It’s an event I look forward to every year for many reasons: reuniting with friends and colleagues from across the nation, meeting with legislators, hearing the keynote speakers, and taking in the sights (and food) of our nation’s capitol. Something really leapt out at me this year, however, and that’s putting it lightly. In the midst of the #MeToo Movement, credit unions can do better. Really.

We’ve all heard stories about conference behavior getting out-of-hand. It’s glorified in ostensibly benign comedies dating back decades, and it seems that every office has its own lore about so-and-so doing such-and-such while under the influence or, perhaps, out from under the influence of so-and-so’s spouse. From what I’ve observed, at least, that type of behavior has either become less typical or has become less overt (hopefully from becoming less acceptable) even in just the last ten years or so. That’s good, right? But there is plenty of work to be done on the subtle stuff, and I know fellow women out there know what I’m talking about.

This year’s GAC left a lot to be desired from credit union men, and I’m not just talking about the offenders. I’m also talking about the men who observe offensive behavior from their peers and yes- their board members- and either chuckle uncomfortably or say absolutely nothing. We’re an industry that boasts a cooperative spirit, diversity, and inclusion (more on that in a moment), but our industry is not immune to bad behavior. In fact, I would argue that our industry needs to be even more aware and react more swiftly when bad behavior is demonstrated, because we can’t tout our family-oriented, not-for-profit, feel-good, opposite-of-Wall-Street, altruistic, people-oriented nature and then behave just like everyone else. It’s the same Sunday School lesson many of us heard as kids. When you’re representing something you passionately believe in, you’d better walk the walk, because people are watching.

Here are a few examples of the bad behavior I’m referring to, and this is from just four days at the 2019 CUNA GAC. More than once, I had a perfect stranger practically drape himself over me and plant an introductory wet kiss on my cheek rather than shaking my hand like he did with the rest of the folks (men) in my group. Please stop doing that. I also noticed that I’m apparently perceived as incapable of entering a room on my own without having the gentle guidance of a man’s hand on my lower back (far too low, in more than one instance). Please stop doing that. A female senior credit union employee from my region was greeted by another senior credit union employee (a male) from a different credit union in our region by him walking up behind her and licking her bare shoulder. Yes, licking her. And then feigning great offense when she wanted nothing to do with him and again when I later firmly told him to keep his distance. A board member I met on the plane to D.C. never once called me by my name in four days. He’d shout, “Hello, Pretty Face!” across the hotel lobby at me instead. At a lunch with a male credit union CEO from another part of the country, I was repeatedly cut off, spoken over, or blatantly dismissed. While discussing the FinCEN guidance for cannabis banking (the very topic I was qualified enough to speak about in Congressional testimony last month), this man interrupted me and said, “No. You’re wrong. There are no rules. Read about it.” Then, turning to my male colleagues, he said he’d be in touch. When he turned back to me, he said, “I’ll introduce you to my compliance girl.” (Note that this conversation is only one example out of dozens I could have used.) At the closing reception, an older man currently sitting on a credit union board made a comment to me that I can’t even comfortably write in this article. Rather than call out the behavior, the male CEO working for him simply mouthed “I’m so sorry” to me. Finally, when I’d had enough of the reception, I politely said to my table that it was time for me to go upstairs. Yet another credit union board member drunkenly shouted as I stood up, “Which room again?”

Is this our best, credit unions? I know there are some reading this and rolling their eyes, thinking I’m just another woman whining (there’s probably another term in your heads) about some innocent, playful banter. This isn’t innocent, and it isn’t playful. It’s chauvinistic and wrong, and we need to start talking about it. I know that’s easier said than done, particularly when board members are in question, but ending sexism in our industry takes all of us. Not just women who are tired after four days with these men at a conference. I also know that “these men” are the exception and not the rule. I work with good guys: men who stood up for me last week. I’m married to a good guy. I have three sons at home who are good guys. I believe that we, as a society, are starting to expect more good guys and expect more from men who aren’t there yet. Our industry should be no exception.

Finally, that diversity and inclusion I mentioned before? Throughout the GAC, I heard a statistic referenced that roughly 50% of credit union CEOs are women. That’s not really an accurate depiction. How many large credit unions have female CEOs? I pulled the most recent Call Report data for Oregon and Washington on NCUA’s website and filtered by “active” status. Out of the fifty-eight credit unions that came up in the Oregon results, fifteen of them have assets greater than $250 million. One. One of those fifteen larger credit unions in Oregon has a female CEO. Out of the eighty-five credit unions in Washington, the results showed thirty credit unions with assets greater than $250 million. Out of those thirty credit unions, only six are led by women. Collectively, out of forty-five credit unions reported with assets greater than $250 million in this region (OR/WA), only 15.6% are led by female CEOs. That paints a vastly different picture than the one we tout at the GAC, and I didn’t even begin to research salary comparisons. It’s anecdotal-- sure. And I’m certainly not diminishing the amazing, challenging, inspiring work that small credit union CEOs do each and every day. I’m only pointing out that our statistical references do not paint a complete picture. There is still male-centrism in the credit union industry, and we have a long way to go before all things are equal.

Fixing this isn’t just up to men. It’s up to all of us. First off, we need to be aware and be willing to talk about this stuff and not gloss over it or brush it under the rug. Speak up. That’s why I’m writing this today instead of posting the usual happy GAC photos with our senators. Second, we need to call it out when we see it, as uncomfortable as that may be. Speak up. Be brave. That means having difficult conversations with board members, recruiting future board members and leaders differently (and from more diverse candidate pools), diligently educating our individual organizations, and issuing swift and appropriate corrective action when we see our employees behaving badly. Don’t accept it, and don’t excuse it based on the relaxed evening environment and abundant alcohol available at most conferences and industry events. If you have an employee who can’t hold his (or her) liquor, he (or she) shouldn’t be drinking. He represents you. He represents your credit union and its member-owners. And he represents every man in our industry who does know and consistently demonstrates how to behave himself and treat others respectfully. Finally, if you’re wondering if you’re one of the offenders, ask yourself if you treat women the way you’d prefer that your wife, mother, sister, or daughter be treated. It's not a perfect gauge, but it's something.

We can do better, credit unions, and it starts with each one of us.