Laura Reviews a dream she had during a nap

So, I sometimes get unusual requests from fans to write about stuff. Sometimes those fans put their money where their mouth is, and commission bizarre features content out of me. Today, I’m doing something odd, financed by a fan.

So, don’t ask me why, I wish I knew, but this fan paid me the better part of £50 in exchange for “taking a nap and reviewing [my] dreams”. Yep, I was paid to have a nap during a work day, hopefully dream, then report back on my findings. I can’t say I hated the idea as a workaholic who is constantly tired.

So, I lay down at about 3:30PM UK, with an alarm set to wake me at 5:30pm to get back up for work. As someone who rarely day sleeps, I had a couple of beers before lying down in a dark room with the Undertale soundtrack gently playing.

Damn I had some weird dreams.

I woke to my alarm utterly confused about where, when and even who I was, convinced momentarily I had slept for days. As soon as I realised what was happening I grabbed a notebook and wrote down everything I could remember. Here are my sleep fueled notes.

At the Bakery

Get all these shoes out of my face, that’s not where they go

Damn I don’t like being force fed

I really don’t like when people in my dreams are “not people”. Not “Not people”, but people who are not not people, but still people.

Now, beyond these initial snippets of written notation I do remember some small aspects of structure from this dream. I’m pretty sure I was on some treasure hunt around London or a similar large city. I was set a bunch of tasks to complete in a real world city before a timer ran out. The further I went, the more obvious it became that I was actually in some kind of simulation.

Nothing really came of that plot thread, that revelation was rather a non issue.

I also spent some time walking a weird alternate version of the artist and comics village from MCM in London. I was trying to buy Yu-Gi-Oh Cards.

So, how would I rate this nap and dream? Well, as nice as the extra sleep was it wasn’t worth the trade off of confusion permeating a portion of my work day. The dream itself lacked narrative cohesion, and failed to follow the basic tenants of plot structure. I get that it’s cool in some circles to create weird avant garde projects in which traditional structures are set aside, but I found it near impossible to glimpse any meaning or value in the jumping between plots without properly drawing conclusions from resolutions.

I will praise it for its level of immersion, at the time I was focused on nothing else in the world.

In short, I wouldn’t recommend my dream. Too little cohesion, definitely felt like an artsy, first year, student film. Only benefit was the refreshed feeling throughout the evening. 4/10