Why am I back? Because I predicted Brexit would be a shit-show and so it proved.

Will I bring back Ceefax? Certainly.

Why the sexy rebrand? Because I decided I could not remain in that bucket and so, like Chuka Umunna, Anna Soubry, Dominic Grieve and Chuka again, I chose pastures new. And so, at a time when political precedent is being broken all over the place, I find myself effectively standing against not just (current) Prime Minister Boris Johnson but also myself. I think that’s a first. (Paging Sir John Curtice.)

I notice that a new incumbent of my old title, who I am sure is completely run by people in the UK and not subject to any foreign control whatsoever, has decided to join the Monster Raving Loonies. An intriguing move. My money was on him taking over Change UK (unless they are now the same thing?)