I’m committed to the NHS, says man bankrolled by private healthcare provider

Health Secretary Andrew Lansley has insisted that he is totally committed to the future of the NHS, and all that stuff about the chairman of Care UK funding his personal office prior to the election is in no way influencing his decisions.

Doctors are considering passing a vote of no confidence in the health secretary, but Lansley has said he has nothing but praise for what many people view as the country’s greatest institution.

“The NHS has given us some great things, such as Holby City and Casualty,” he said told eager reporters.

“I for one would feel that I was in good hands if my nurse was Patsy Kensit or the doctor treating me was Robert Powell.”

“But if you were to ask Nurse Patsy or Dr Powell what they hated most about the job then I’ve decided they would say bureaucracy.”

“This government is absolutely committed to using the words bureaucracy and red tape, and as such I want to cut through red tape and set fire to bureaucracy.”

Lansley funded by healthcare provider

The Health Secretary then hit back at critics who say that both Casualty and Holby City are fictional programmes made for the BBC.

“It’s typical of a biased organisation like the BBC to deny the realities of life in the town of Holby,” he continued.

“I’m afraid as much as I respect the views of doctors like Jim Dale and Kenneth Williams, these changes have to be made.”