I’ve always been easily adaptable

As Judy Tenuta would say: “It could happen!”

As some of my regular readers and fans may remember (if you’re a fan, that means you’re around my age and the odds of you remembering anything is slim), I found out a few weeks ago that I am going to be a grandfather. Okay, I’ll make it easy…the article is “I’m A Grandfather…Kinda…Almost.”

At the time, my daughter (she’s the one who’s pregnant), thought for sure it was going to be a boy. The first ultrasound was inconclusive.

She made the mistake of asking me what the name should be if it is a boy. It didn’t take long for me to shout out the most obvious choice.

My grandson

Zorro!

That didn’t go over well at all. I don’t know why. I think it’s the coolest name ever. But I was outvoted, the entire world to 1.

The discussion turned out to be immaterial. She went for another ultrasound the other day, and they found out the baby is a girl. My daughter, who is known to make the same mistake twice, asked me what I thought a good girl’s name would be. She wouldn’t let me use “Zorro” again (although I secretly wanted to).

Needless to say, it didn’t take me long to come up with an answer.

“Xena!!” I screamed.

My granddaughter

Outvoted again. Why do I even bother?

My daughter goes to the doctor a lot. For tests, consultations, more tests, and I think it’s just becoming a habit. My mother didn’t do that when she was pregnant with me.

In those days, (as I recall), the doctor told the mother she was pregnant and “…see ya in 9 months!”

My mother didn’t quit smoking. Smoking was good for you in those days. The doctor told her, though, that she should only drink beer. No hard liquor. My mom didn’t like beer. I think she stuck to hard liquor.

the good ol’ days

Today, you have to be so careful. The pregnant mother doesn’t get any sleep even before the baby is born! I think it’s all nonsense. My daughter should be able to do whatever she wants to do and the baby will come out just fine. I suggested she start smoking.

My mother did all that, and look how great I turned out! (Again…opinions vary).

I’m perfectly fine…some might say I’m a ‘stable genius’

…except for maybe that baby naming thing…