Nobody's falling for this obvious con, are they?

Here's how it works around Camp Runamuck. You float some outrageous trial balloon—like defunding the Special Olympics, say, or crippling the efforts to protect the Great Lakes—that sets the heads of rational people ablaze. Then, you have the president* swoop in and "save" whatever the program. Of course, this sells out your meathead Secretary of Education and the various energy-industry finger-puppets who carry out your environmental "policy," but, what of that? They fcked up. They trusted you.

Because The New York Times stylebook forbids headlines to contain the words "bullshit bait-and-switch," the Times calls this "an abrupt pivot."



“The Special Olympics will be funded. I just told my people,” Mr. Trump said to reporters before leaving for a campaign-style rally in Michigan. The president said he had long supported the organization. His statement was an abrupt pivot from the stance offered by others in his administration. Ms. DeVos defended the trims in a Senate budget hearing not long before the president undercut her position.



Comfy under that bus, Secretary Betsy?

DeVos testifies during a Senate Labor, Health and Human Services, Education and Related Agencies Subcommittee discussing proposed budget estimates and justification for FY2020. Zach Gibson Getty Images

The Great Lakes part of the scam is even more risible. The Great Lakes Initiative is budgeted at $300 million, and this administration* has tried to cut it for three years running. Each time, Congress has thrown the proposal back in Trump's face. His latest budget cut the funding for the initiative by $270 million. The howls echoed like the gales of November remembered throughout the ice-water mansions of the region's congresscritters.

So the president* flies to Grand Rapids for one of his periodic wankfests, and this is what he said.

"I support the Great Lakes. Always have. They are beautiful. They are big, very deep. Record deepness, right? And I am going to get, in honor of my friends, full funding of $300 million for the Great Lakes Restoration Initiative, which you have been trying to get for over 30 years. So, we will get it done."

Only he can fix it.

He threatens to destroy something so he can say he's saving it, and some saps ever fall for it. Anyway, this particular grift owes more to the operating principles of the Piranha Brothers than it does to anything else. The federal budget as a ransom note is another interesting part of our new normal.

Respond to this post on the Esquire Politics Facebook page here.

Charles P. Pierce Charles P Pierce is the author of four books, most recently Idiot America, and has been a working journalist since 1976.

This content is created and maintained by a third party, and imported onto this page to help users provide their email addresses. You may be able to find more information about this and similar content at piano.io