It's a crazy new hipster character fond of criminal and sexual hijinks! Let's meet Kari Ferrell, the 22 year-old tattooed Utah girl who scammed her way through hipster Brooklyn. Sex, lies, cancer, and bands, yea!

Kari's story first came out when she lied her way into a job at Vice. That lasted a week, until someone there Googled her and found out she was wanted back in Utah for fraud, theft, and $60K in bad checks, and was generally a con artist.

But today former Gawkerer Doree Shafrir comes out with a monstrous piece in the Observer on Kari's whole freaking life story (Doree is most comfortable when dealing with the criminal element). Oh it is delightful, assuming you weren't personally unfortunate enough to come in contact with the brash young pathological liar/ vixen! The short version: Kari stole and scammed her way around Salt Lake City for a while, then decamped to Brooklyn, where she resumed stealing and scamming, using aggressive sex appeal and wild lies like "I have cancer" or "I'm pregnant" or "I work there" (sometimes all at once, to her boyfriends!) to get...money? Validation? She's obviously mad psycho.

It was also around November that a guy named Troy was at Union Pool, the Williamsburg bar, when the bartender passed him a note from another customer. It read, "I want to give you a hand job with my mouth," and was signed "Korean Abdul-Jabbar." It was, according to Troy, from Ms. Ferrell. Another time, a patron at Fabiane's, the café on Bedford Avenue in Williamsburg, said Ms. Ferrell passed him a note which read: "I want you to throw a hot dog down my hall."

Now there's nothing wrong with that in the context of a loving, honest, one night stand, but this girl was just trying to manipulate people. Virtually everyone says that she told them she had terminal cancer with only months to live, and she was constantly in the hospital [Kari in the hospital with "Cancer" pic via Flickr]. Maybe she just liked hospitals, and the other crazy people there! Doree even tracked down Ferrell's first teenage boyfriend back in Utah. She was crazy then too, sending herself threatening text messages and being this guy's sugar daddy, with money she stole.

Mr. Hansen went to Los Angeles with his band; Ms. Ferrell and some of her friends tagged along. She accused a guy of hitting on her and Mr. Hansen knocked his teeth out.

That was probably a mistake, in retrospect! Anyhow Kari Ferrell is still at large and on the run, so if you know her whereabouts, or just have some crazy stories about her, do not approach her directly; just email us at once, and we'll all have a good laugh.

Oh, look we have one already, from our very own Richard Lawson:

