Name: Ryan.

Age: Seven.

Value: £17.3m.

It’s wrong to hate a child, isn’t it? Yes! Of course it is. Especially if you hate them for having more money than you. Let’s end this line of inquiry right here.

Fine. Explain Ryan to me. Ryan is a seven-year-old YouTuber who has just been announced by Forbes as the world’s highest-earning YouTube star. At the time of writing, he has 17 million subscribers and his videos have been watched 25bn times.

Impressive! What does he do? Play piano concertos? Cure diseases on the fly? He reviews toys.

What? Ryan reviews toys. His YouTube channel is called Ryan ToysReview. He gets a toy, then you watch him play with it, then the next day it’s discarded for something new.

And this has earned him £17.3m? In the year to June 2018, it has earned him £17.3m.

And it’s wrong to hate a child? Yes. Emphatically, yes it is.

Can you at least describe one of his videos for me? Of course. Let’s go with “Ryan’s Creates His Holiday Wishlist! [sic]” from 25 October. First, Ryan has his photograph taken for a Target promotional campaign. Then he and his father play with a couple of dinosaur toys that are available to purchase at Target. Then Ryan’s mother hides a Ryan’s World Mystery Surprise Egg – a big plastic egg with Ryan’s face on it that contains some toys and slime and retails on eBay for up to £120 – and Ryan and his dad have to find it. When they find it, Ryan’s mother carefully explains what the egg is and what’s inside it, and how cool and exclusive and desirable it is.

And this is a YouTube channel aimed at children? Yes.

And it exists to introduce a young boy as a peer who gains their trust before trying to sell them items emblazoned with images of his own face? Yes.

And you say his parents are part of these videos? Again, yes.

Is it wrong to hate his parents? It’s wrong to hate anyone, although they have done quite well out of their son.

Hopefully, one day Ryan will realise what’s going on and legally emancipate himself from them. Honestly, that’s the best-case scenario. They have reduced their child to a caricature, all in the name of money. This never ends well.

Still, slime sounds fun. No! They’ve got you, too!

Do say: “Ryan is a wealthy, self-obsessed entrepreneur who lacks the wisdom to realise the harm he is doing.”



Don’t say: “He’ll make a fine president one day.”