OK, zombiologists, conspiracy theorists, slaves to sci-fi, and keepers of the Boy Scout motto, it's time to put your $24,000 where your mouth is. OpticsPlanet has assembled a stunning and formidable sprawl of zombie apocalypse survival tools into the Z.E.R.O. (Zombie Extermination, Research and Operations) Kit, and in so doing, crowned itself the indisputable overlord of the undead offensive.

Equal parts, tactical, medical, scientific, defensive, and Yippee-ki-yay, mother fucker!, the Z.E.R.O. arms zombie annihilators both to combat the infected who cannot be saved, and to develop a cure for the innocent who still can. In warpainted vigilante mode, you can use the likes of night vision scopes to enhance your already keen retinal zombie detection powers, a watch with SureShot calculator that provides shooting solutions out to 1000 feet for wiping out a nest sniper-style, and a thermal imaging camera for tracking trails of freshly disembodied brain matter. Up close, laser grips aid in distraction when blood brawls get sticky, and compact knives stored in a tactical vest deliver last-chance guttings when a zombie has you in its throes. And when you walk away from the battle unscathed, kick back and relax with a cold one from the kit's Tactical Beer Mug.

When not actively kicking ass, zombie assailants can employ the Z.E.R.O.'s panoply of laboratory equipment to test samples and experiment on captured carriers in hopes of finding a cure for the pandemic, or at least a means of systematically obliterating the flesh-eaters without risking human lives. OpticsPlanet also points out the possibility of researching an appetite suppressant that curbs zombies' hunger for human flesh, or developing a method of training them to be docile, since they can perform the physical work of 30 men, and could thus be very useful in our quest to be an entirely sedentary race. Anyway, beakers, pipettes, a Celestron microscope, even an incinerator all contribute to the advancement of this noble Undead Reappropriation cause.

Z.E.R.O Kits include [note that you might want to grab a cold beverage, seek out an ergonomic chair, and brace for WTF impact before continuing]:

WEAPON ACCESSORIES

GG&G Extreme Heavy Duty Swivel Bipod

Eotech Gear Scopecoat Cover for EoTech Zombie Stopper Red Dot Sight

OPMOD PVS-14 Monocular Gen 3 PINNACLE Night Vision Scope 64 lp/mm

Thermal Eye X50 100x800px Waterproof Thermal Imaging Camera

Surefire 6V LED Shotgun Forend Weaponlight for Benelli M1-M2

Leupold VX-R ZOMBIE 1.25-4x20mm 30mm Riflescope

Plano Moulding Zombie Ammo Can

Champion Zombie Target 6-Pack

Streamlight TLR-1 HP Long Range Rail Mounted Flashlight, Standard Switch w/ Rail Locating Keys for Glock Style, 1913 Picatinny

Safariland 6305 ALS Tactical Holster w/ Quick Release Leg Harness

New, Steiner 10x50 Military Binoculars Laser Rangefinder

Leupold Mark 4 20-60x80mm, Black Spotting Scope

Laser Devices DBAL-I2 Dual Beam Laser, Visible Green Laser

Mako Group Fab Defense Handguard w/Rails For Remington

Trijicon ACOG 6x48 Dual Ill Riflescope w/Mount

Vero Vellini Premium Padded Leather Rifle Sling

Crimson Trace Full-size Glock Laser Zombie Edition

Eotech Zombie Stopper Red Dot Holographic Sight

KNIVES

Browning Zombie Apocalypse Knife

SOG Tigershark Elite Tactical Knife

CASES AND BACKPACKS

Eberlestock G4 Operator Pack, Multicam G4MM

OPMOD Professional Range Bag, Pull Out & Brass

OPMOD Floating MSR Extreme Gun Case

Camelbak BFM Hydration Pack - 100 oz/3.0L MultiCam

RELOADING AND GUNSMITHING EQUIPMENT

Otis Technology Zombie Gun Cleaning System

RCBS Pro-Melt Furnace

RCBS Pro 2000 Progressive Press

Lyman 1200 DPS 3 Digital Powder System

TOOLS

Pelican Mobile Tool Chest with Drawers

SUREFIRE SF123A BULK BOX

Brunton Solaris USB Foldable Solar Panel

Leatherman MUT Black Multi Tool w/Black Molle Sheath

Night Armor Tactical Pen

OPMOD Battle Mug with Carry Handle

Brunton International Pocket Transit Pro Compass

5.11 Tactical Field Ops Waterproof Uni-Directional Bezel Watch

Streamlight E-Spot FireBox LED Lantern

PROTECTIVE GEAR

Tactical Assault Gear Rampage Releasable Armor Carrier

Tactical Assault Gear Intrepid Chest Rig w/Grenade & Mag Pouches

Oakley Commit SQ Sunglasses, Brown Sugar Frame

Stanley Large First Aid Kit

Blackhawk S.O.L.A.G. HD with Kevlar

ESS Profile TurboFan Military/Tactical Goggles - Black Frame, Clear & Smoke Gray Lenses

Specter Gear M-2 Mk-3 Rapid Reload Chest Carrier for AK-47 Magazines

LABORATORY EQUIPMENT