TAMPA — It couldn't have been easy being married to "The Boss."

But for 54 years, until the day he died in July 2010, Joan Steinbrenner provided an effortlessly graceful counterbalance to her charismatic and controversial husband, the late New York Yankees owner George Steinbrenner.

Just as her husband recruited athletes-turned-celebrities to fill the Yankees' famed lineups, Mrs. Steinbrenner presided over her own team: four children, 14 grandchildren and three great-grandchildren.

Joan (pronounced Jo-Ann) Steinbrenner died in the couple's Tampa home on Friday, surrounded by family and loved ones. She was 83.

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"Joan was a compassionate and caring matriarch whose profound love for her family and those in the community always inspired us," the Steinbrenner family said in a statement. "Her elegance and grace touched everyone around her, and we know her spirit will live on through her legacy of good works."

Born Elizabeth Joan Zieg in 1935, Mrs. Steinbrenner was raised in Mt. Vernon, Ohio and earned a degree in dental hygiene from Ohio State University. The daughter of a wealthy real estate developer, she was studying in Columbus when she fell in love with another natural-born businessman from the Cleveland suburb of Rocky River.

She married George Steinbrenner on May 12, 1956. That was 17 years before he convinced a group of investors to join him in purchasing the Yankees. She never did practice dentistry, instead helping her husband run baseball's most storied franchise. When George died on July 13, 2010, Mrs. Steinbrenner continued her work as the Yankees' vice chairwoman.

"She was a perfect compliment to Mr. Steinbrenner in so many ways and really was the consummate partner and spouse," Yankees CFO Anthony "Tony" Bruno said.

"She had a great sense of humor and had this distinctive way of writing tons of detailed notes on her stacks of documents at meetings. Really it would be the highlight of the week when she was around. She always inquired about your family and would remember the pictures of your children you sent out in Christmas cards. She was just so natural and genuine and just had this terrific personal touch in every conversation."

She was renowned for her philanthropy in Tampa and nationwide, though she often shied away from her husband's perpetual spotlight. He was known to remain tight-lipped when asked about his family, dismissing reporters questions for "security reasons." But at home, family and friends say Mrs. Steinbrenner was fearless, unafraid to speak her mind or challenge the bombastic and formidable Mr. Steinbrenner.

Whether the tabloids were dubbing her husband "the most hated man in baseball" or, in later years, speculating on her family's commitment to keep his stake in the Yankees, those who knew her best said Mrs. Steinbrenner was unflappable; the resilient, savvy and effortlessly elegant cornerstone of her husband's empire.

Even in her later years, she remained committed to her roles as grandmother and philanthropist, though she preferred to work from behind the scenes.

"They helped a lot of people that people don't even know about," Tampa City Council member Charlie Miranda said. "She was just a very kind, very nice lady. Just a very down-to-earth person."

What people do know, though — especially those in Tampa — is that Mrs. Steinbrenner's resume of charitable work in the Tampa area never stopped growing, even in recent months.

She was a charter member of Town and Gown, a group that connected the University of South Florida with downtown Tampa supporters. In 1981 and 1982, she was named state chairwoman for the Florida Special Olympics and for two years she sat on the board of the National Society to Prevent Blindness.

She was a longtime board member of Children's Home Inc., a nonprofit in Tampa that helps at-risk children and families, and was one of the original members of the H.B. Plant Museum Society.

From 1991 to 2000, she held a seat on the development council of the St. Joseph's Hospital Foundation board. She was also a member of the Junior League of Tampa and The Chiselers, and she sat on the Florida Orchestra's board of directors.

"Mrs. Steinbrenner exuded the quiet, dignified grace that characterized her journey through life," Tampa mayor Bob Buckhorn said. "Mom, wife and philanthropist in her own right, she too left her mark on Tampa."

In lieu of flowers, the family said memorial donations can be made to the St. Joseph's Children's Hospital Foundation or a charity of the mourner's choice.

Times staff writers Charlie Frago and Justin Trombly contributed to this report. Contact Anastasia Dawson at adawson@tampabay.com. Follow @adawsonwrites.