WASHINGTON – The Trump Administration is coming down hard on Democrats and journalists whom they accuse of politicizing US soldiers killed in combat, something they insist has not been acceptable since 2016.

“It is unacceptable to use our nation’s fallen heroes as political footballs in 2017,” insisted White House Press Secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders. “The time and place to do that was during and before the 2016 US presidential election and transition.”

Administration officials are irate over media focus on the death of US Army Sgt. La David Johnson and three other soldiers in Niger in an ISIS ambush on October 4th, and President Trump’s controversial, delayed conciliatory phone call to Sgt. Johnson’s widow in which he allegedly told her “[Sgt. Johnson?] knew what he signed up for.” They focused their anger on House Representative Frederica Wilson (D, FL), whom the administration said in a statement, “unfairly leveled a politicized attack regarding military deaths in 2017, which is not 2016.”

“This is a military tragedy,” said White House Chief of Staff General John Kelly outside the White House on Monday, referring to the Niger attack. “Military deaths are sacred, like women used to be, like religion used to be, like Gold Star families used to be. For anyone to take something sacred like women, religious morality, or soldiers’ honor, in this day and age, specifically since January 20th of this year, and politicize or demean those things, is abhorrent,” he said, glancing around constantly. Then, in a hushed voice, “Is… is bossman around?” He then vanished into the Rose Garden.

Even the president joined the tumultuous debate, tweeting about the attack in Niger this month:

Democrats’ alleged politicizing of military tragedies in 2017 has not gone unnoticed by Republicans House Representatives. “We are planning to launch an investigation,” said House Intelligence Chair Devin Nunes (R, CA). “Or maybe eight of them.”

The black pot in your great grandmother’s firepit contributed to this report. It can be steamed at theflatearthtimes@gmail.com.

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