As the pounding went out of control, the hand gripping my hair at the back of my neck became an ecstatic sensation. His weight, his desire, the angle of my neck, his hand pressing and gripping, his fucking rawness, but the fog in my eyes, spreading from the sides of my field of view, as I ached and fucking screamed, was getting deeper. My head, singing from the submissive I'd become, feeling the weals and cuts stinging from the sweat and the salt of him, but now, this was different. My brain awash with the tightening, hearing him let loose now, floating in the pure connection of just fucking sex. Feeling him slamming harder, into my belly, hurting me, but fucking loving a man just unravel his deepest fucking desires. Knowing I made him do that. But the blood sings, as I cant breath. He's too heavy, spreading my ankles was too much, but he just keeps trying to thrust his cock into my lungs. It's a blinding light that's dimming, but I need him to cum. I need him to make me feel...

I cant breathe. The fog of sparkling sparkles, and I just feel my cunt on fire. Merciless. Defenseless. I barely hear a growl from him, as I begin to fade, the blood singing, my heart skipping a beat, then stopping skipping. The white noise in my head. As my lungs cant be lungs. But the joy floods through me. A man is fucking me to the point I cannot bear it, the touching of souls, the touching of pure essence. The last breath leaves me, as he begins to push me over the edge, fierce sparkles dancing in my head's eye, becoming grey as the fog fills me, knowing that it's gonna be terminal. I give in. My neck is so painful. And he just keeps filling me. Even if I wanted to speak the safe word, I couldnt.

If I could, I would. But the anoxic sensation of every single nerve ending in my body feeling that man fucking me. With every ounce of his desire. What a way to go, experiencing the desire to end desires.

I'm close.

The wrists were tied too tight. And the ankles. Blood cant flow. The fog is falling, feeling a man love me...

Ecstacy is a word. Feeling a man inside you is also a sentence. Knowing you are about to die is a hard feeling of hormones and endorphins, feelings and reflections, desires...

The blinding light is too much. I've tasted it, and I have to see it again. The emergency code, is two taps, I cant scream 'Red Light', like I want to. But I summon the energy, before the fog falls for the final time.

And it's coming... It's coming... I want to feel him come... I want to feel him come inside me... Just once more, before the fog falls...

I dont like this fog. It's cold. And It's harsh. And I dont want to be here. But he keeps just pounding, and it feels so fucking good... But... I'm drifting... I'm starting to fall... And it feels so good... But...

I weakly tapped the emergency code on the bed, and immediately he let me loose... Let me... Breathe... Gulping for air... Released... Blood, beginning to flow... Where it should... Reviving...

But the insides of me, were screaming, at the sensations I'd visited.

Fuck... That was intense... Fucking unholy...

I'd nearly been fucked... to death...

The moment his hands and weight left me, the knots on the rope had been pulled, letting me free. But inside, I knew... He kind of... Wanted this... Wanted to push me... To the limit. His desire, just taking precedence... And I was willing. And he responded to that... Kind of knew it. Sensed it. He wanted to give me a present, he wasnt being selfish, he was being giving. We have had so many adventures, it's been exhausting. But this was different. Unspoken. I'll admit, I'd fantasised about it. And we're able to talk. Able to express ourselves, when it comes to desires and fantasies, and discovering your playmate is compatible, willing and grinning from ear to ear, when the phrase, 'I wonder...', is let loose into the air. But this was something I'd never expressed aloud. He just seemed to realise. I wanted to be a passenger. Curious even... Just couldnt stop, just couldnt stop the heart screaming out, as the waves crashed around, the pulse becoming sound, becoming noise, becoming louder and louder, as my man was a man, fucking me. Fucking me so deep, fucking me with such abandon, such raw humanity, so raw it nearly ended.

And then he held me, almost sobbing, and I felt his skin against mine, just grateful to be able to. Hearing his desperate whispers, into the nape of my neck, hearing him sigh, hearing his apologies, over and over, his hands clasping me, as if I were the most precious thing in the world, and my heart sang again. Sang because it could. Sang because of what he'd given me. Sang because this man enveloping me, loved me so completely. Loved me to the point of almost ending me. This is a bond, I will never feel again. A right hand dipped into my soul, and clenched, gripping hard, then gripping harder still. As his kisses rained down onto me, I sobbed. I'm not sure if it was relief, or if it was feeling cradled so tenderly at this moment of utter vulnerability, or if it was the adrenaline still circling around me that created the guilt of experiencing such deep pleasure. I know what those tingles in my belly mean, and I felt them ring as he held me there. And we breathed. So deeply.