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Don’t underestimate the power of good intentions, sometimes the meaning behind our actions can be just as important as the actions themselves. People often say “it’s the thought that counts” when they receive a gift, compliment, or favor. And there’s a very strong psychological truth behind this.

In fact, recent experiments published in the journal Social Psychological and Personality Science show that good intentions can play a major role in our everyday experience of pleasure and pain.

In the first study, researchers had participants sit in an easy chair with an electronic massage pad. In one group, the machine was turned on by a computer; and in the other group, the machine was turned on by another human. Although the massages were exactly the same, researchers found that individuals consistently experienced more pleasure by the massage when a person flipped the switch.

As it turns out, the idea that another human being made a conscious effort to turn on the machine made the participants perceive the massage as more enjoyable.

In the second study, people were given a package of candy with a note on it for Valentine’s Day. For half of the participants the note read, “I picked this just for you. Hope it makes you happy.” For the other half the note read, “Whatever. I don’t care. I just picked it randomly.”

Researchers found that the candy tasted better and sweeter when the participants received the note of good intentions rather than the note that said they were chosen randomly. Again we see that individuals seem to enjoy their experiences more when they are accompanied with positive attention.

A third study tested pain from an electric shock. One group was told the electric shock was done by a person accidentally. A second group was told the electric shock was done maliciously. And a third was told the electric shock was done benevolently, in an effort to help them win money.

People who received the shock benevolently reported much less pain than the other two groups. Just the idea that the shock was done in good intentions made the participant feel less hurt.

( Update: Another 2019 study presented at the Anesthesiology® Annual Meeting found that patients who have their blood drawn from kind and courteous medical professionals experience a 390% reduction in pain. Just another example of good intentions changing our perception of pleasure and pain.)



The Power of Good Intentions in Our Everyday Lives

The studies mentioned above are small and simple, but they have profound implications on the role of good intentions in our everyday lives.

Here are important ideas to keep in mind:

By acting with good intentions, we improve other people’s daily experiences. People enjoy knowing that other people are doing something out of the “good of their heart.” When we show that we care about someone’s well-being – and we do kind deeds for them – we make life better for them. They feel better around us, and that improves our relationships and our ability to build positive connections. No matter how big or small, act with good intentions toward others. Also, studies show kindness has a ripple effect, where the receiver of the good deed will be motivated to do a good deed of their own. So your daily actions are having an influence on more people than you realize!

People enjoy knowing that other people are doing something out of the “good of their heart.” When we show that we care about someone’s well-being – and we do kind deeds for them – we make life better for them. They feel better around us, and that improves our relationships and our ability to build positive connections. Also, studies show kindness has a ripple effect, where the receiver of the good deed will be motivated to do a good deed of their own. So your daily actions are having an influence on more people than you realize! By assuming others are good and well-intentioned, we improve our own experiences. It’s important that we are not only good at giving kindness, but also receiving kindness. This is hard to do if you are always suspicious of others and thinking they have ulterior motivates – that sucks up the pleasure and joy of being a receiver. When someone gives a compliment, gift, or favor, assume they are coming from a good place and accept it graciously. Often we have to give people the benefit of the doubt (until they prove otherwise), if we want to make the most of our daily relationships.

Often we may fall into the trap of thinking only consequences matter – only physical actions – and intentions are unimportant. But research suggests that we do care a lot about the intentions of others when evaluating their behavior.

This holds true when it comes to harmful acts too. One 2013 study published in Psychological Science found that people see intended harm as far worse and more damaging than unintended harm.

It matters if someone accidentally spills their drink on your new shirt, or if they consciously spill their drink on you to upset you, even if the consequences of the action itself are exactly the same.

In the same way, it matters if we act with good intentions in mind vs. if we act indifferently or with ulterior motives (“I want people to like me!” or “I want a person to do something for me!”). Kindness should come from a place of good intentions before all else.

In general, we all like to believe that we are living in a world where people are generally good and everyone wants everyone to be happy. Having a cynical attitude toward life can often hurt our well-being and make us less likely to connect with people in a healthy and positive way.

Are you living a life with good intentions? Practice doing it more and you’ll see an increased ability to build positive connections and enjoy life more.



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