In a 42-7 shellacking from the LA Rams, there aren’t a whole lot of bright spots to latch onto for the Seattle Seahawks. But, in typical Kool-Aid guzzling fashion, I’m going to anyways because that’s just who I am. Though you wouldn’t have known it if you watched the game with me yesterday. Heck, I even cursed in front of grandma; merry Christmas everyone. The Holidays are off to a flying start.

Perhaps a solid ass kicking is just what the doctor ordered, organizations can justify bad decisions or not make difficult choices when faced with success. After all, we don’t always succeed for the right reasons, there is some measure of luck/randomness in all things.

Jon Ryan, whom I previously slandered in Kicker Consideration with regards to cap space in the coming season(s), had a slightly above career average day kicking 47.5 yards per punt. And while Ryan did well, he was asked to punt nine times over the course of the game. Those of you playing shots for punts are likely not awake yet as I write this article early Monday morning, and may God have mercy on your hangover.

If your household is anything like mine, the punts themselves weren’t really the focus of your attention. Though one of them was lower and more of a line drive, in my house I was mostly politely reminding the players on the other side of the television that there was a returner by the name of Pharoh Cooper who I would really prefer they tackle sooner rather than later. Alas, despite my constant and often vulgar encouragement the Seahawks allowed Cooper to run right through them on several returns averaging over 18 yards per punt return meaning punts averaged an anemic 29.2 yards change in field position. In addition, the two times Blair Walsh got to kick-off Cooper averaged 26 yards per return. All in all things appeared to go really well for the return coverage unit. The decision to keep special teams standout Tanner McEvoy really paid off, as was evident from his first reception of the game, and I’m sure Kasen Williams fans are now convinced it was the correct personnel move. I’m not salty, you’re salty. Now, let’s check in on our Ex:

That entire side of the stadium can see Hauschka taking a piss pic.twitter.com/sKHQIGrl3c — Busted Coverage (@bustedcoverage) December 17, 2017

It is painfully obvious after this last game that something is rotten within the special teams coverage as of late. Thank goodness the Rams only started seven of their 14 drives at the 50 yard line or beyond otherwise the Seahawks might have a real problem on their hands. My one consolation prize is that Hall of Fame digital general managers around the world will quiet the chorus calling for us to sign someone, anyone, other than Walsh despite there being a lack of good options. If only they had kicked those 12 extra field goals. At this point I would almost welcome giving Roberto Aguayo a shot just to let him prove before your very eyes that no, he isn’t going to magically return to his college self. Instead, bring in Cameron Van Winkle of UW, he’d probably do it for some season tickets and a nice parking spot at CenturyLink.

In all seriousness, regardless of this last game the Seahawks will be fine.

A loss this bad is something that some Seattle fans have never had to face; that’s not to say anything of “bandwagon fans” but only that the Seahawks have been great for six years and that’s a long amount of time to bring in new viewers. It sounds as though I am being glib when I say this is what Seahawks fans used to endure when watching in the 1990s but really I’m not, this is old hat. It wasn’t pretty, though you could argue this was worse because of the pre-game hope and playoff implications.

But to be perfectly honest, I was basically numb by halftime and hopefully you were too. Don’t take the loss, or this article, too seriously. Failures such as this one don’t define a franchise, and if they do it was a house of cards to begin with. Seattle will bounce back, many fans have been through worse together. A profound loss can be instructional for players, coaches, and fans alike and humble pie can work wonders for the soul. Since it’s the holidays and my diet has gone to hell anyways so pass it down the table, I have some feelings to eat.