For real, though, it's not as difficult as the terrifying name makes it seem. The most popular path up Kilimanjaro is derisively referred to as "the Coca-Cola route," on account of how it's jam-packed with tourists and gift shops the entire way up. Yes, it's a long walk, one that takes around five days on average to complete, but there's certainly none of that "stick a pickax in a jagged ridge and hope it holds your body weight" stuff that you envision when you hear someone say they're mountain climbing.

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Oh, there's also a path that lets people drive most of the way there. When they finally leave their air-conditioned moving palace, the story they tell their friends is officially ready to begin. There are a number of details they'll be sure to leave out. First of all, Kilimanjaro rises at such an incredibly gentle gradient that the main challenge is to walk slowly enough up to avoid getting altitude sickness. One trail guide described the pace by saying, "imagine an arthritic 90-year-old walking backwards -- that's probably too fast."

Another detail white "adventurers" will leave out of the story of their "Kilimanjaro journey" is the porters -- or brown people they pay to carry their shit for them while they focus on not walking too fast.

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Of course, climbing Kilimanjaro is not without its challenges. As this site explains, figuring out how much to tip the guys who carry your bags and cook your food can be extremely tricky.