A/N: I started watching Marie kondo recently, and I really got inspired. I’ve started thanking my room for its service (my room being a cardboard box outside a maccies dumpster.) please enjoy and keep in mind I’m not actually a racist. Konichiwa- Hobnob

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Mary Kondo walked into the work room. It was fucking filthy. Not to mention there were a bunch of men in lipstick staring at her.

The walls were an ungodly shade of pink. Clothes and shit outfits littered the floor in excess. She put a single hand to the wall. Yes, this room was hurting. It had been plagued by greed and vanity and she needed to help it.

“グーグル翻訳男を降りる” Marie said, getting out her bucket of cleaning supplies.

“She says this room is fucking filthy.” The translator said with a grin, giving a small bow.

The queens all sighed and nodded, muttering in agreement. It really was disgusting. The mold on the ceiling even gave Ariel Versauce Influenza.

“We know eh :(“ Brooke lynn sobbed, hanging her head in Canadian shame. “It’s just that the production crew spent all the money In the budget on cyst cream for soju eh.”

“Ah…” Mary nodded understandingly, much like Jesus would of if he was still alive. “No…probrem mothafuckars…テレサは黄道帯のキラーです”

“She says she will clean the room for you.” The translator said with a grin, giving a small bow.

The queens all clapped in unison. This was truly a long overdue visit! Kahana Montrese even started weeping with joy. Silky Nutmeg ganache picked up Mary Kondo on her back and ran around the workroom like some kind of horse.

With a swift blow to the neck, Mary decapitated Silky. Her head rolled around the floor spurting ganache everywhere , all over the queens and the walls. It was a total mess.

No matter. nothing a bit of fairy liquid wouldn’t fix.

“She did not…spark joy…” The cleaner said, stood over her cold dead body as it sagged to the floor limply. “Let’s strart on the rewst of the wroom.”

Nobody was really in any position to argue with Marie Kondo. They all obliged and took a small step back as to not have their bodies mangled.

“Let’s startwrith the-“

A mysterious man entered the room. Marie’s heart skipped a beat. He was nothing like she’d ever seen before. He was tall and mysterious figure with a head that glistened in the light.

“Hello hello hello.”

Marie Turned to her translator expectantly. She needed to know what this beautiful specimen of gods design had to say.

“He says Konichiwa.” The translator said with a grin, giving a small bow.

The mysterious figure came down the stairs with his long lanky legs. They made a sort of clicky noise as he walked but that didn’t bother Marie at all.

“Ah, I’m rupaul. You must be plastique Tiara right?”

She didn’t even have time to react to rupauls obvious racial profiling. She’d fallen in love. Hard.

“Ah…I am Marie kondo-san. It’s ahnhonrour.” The cleaner said kissing his slender hand. He looked like something straight off the pages of a yaoi.

As soon as she touched him…he sparked joy. For a moment Marie forgot she was happily married, all she felt was bliss. She just knew it had to be fate.

Rupaul chuckled and pushed the glasses up the bridge of his nose.

“Miss Mary…how about you and me go on a little date? It can’t be nice staying in this stuffy room all day with no food or water.”

“Ah…人種差別主義者ではないようですね。その風刺。大きな違いがあります” Marie said, blushing like a schoolgirl on steroids.

“She says, yes.” The translator said with a grin, giving a small bow.

The queens all cheered as the two engaged in a passionate kiss. It was the perfect combination of sloppy, loving, and sexy. Saliva started flying everywhere and rupaul mewled a few times.

“Wait a minute eh.” Brooke spoke up, Waving her welsh flag (she couldn’t find any Canadian ones in Morrisons.) “What aboot us?”

Ru thought for a moment before pointing a bony finger at the whitest girl in the room.

“Yeah uh you win. Get her a crown or something.”

Scarlet envy jumped with glee. She was given one of those small paper crowns from the Christmas crackers, and she was pushed out of the room forcibly by sarge.

Marie and Ru linked arms. This truly was the beginning of the rest of their lives.

They left the werk room and rode into the sunset.