If 'The Kiss of Death' still commanded column space in the newspaper formerly known as The Sun News-Pictorial, then the late Lou Richards would’ve declared Collingwood unbackable certainties against Carlton last Saturday.

Which is why the great man would have been paying for his injudicious selection and made good on his promise this week – something like allowing Samo Petrevski-Seton to plait his hair with a rat tail in the event of an unthinkable Blues triumph.

Sadly, football and the ancient city of Melbourne has lost its much-loved clown prince with the passing of 'Louie the Lip' at the age of 94, and while the former Collingwood premiership captain’s been spared the indignity of sporting the rat tail, he did fall foul of a similar stunt almost 30 years ago.

That happened in 1989, when Lou fancied his old team to knock over Carlton on the eve of the Round 15 match at VFL Park, vowing to have his head shaved by Milham Hanna in Lygon Street if the prediction proved incorrect.



Mil Hanna scalps Lou Richards, Lygon Street, July 1989. (Photo: HWT)

Of course, Carlton beat Collingwood by six points, with former rover Andrew Phillips snapping the winning the goal in the final minute - and Lou made good on his promise.

“It’s so long ago now I can hardly remember, but I’m sure Lou declared that if Carlton beat Collingwood I could scalp him,” said Hanna, named at centre half-back in that game.

“The photoshoot happened in Lygon Street, and while Lou did chicken out by going with a skull cap, it was all good fun. That was Lou. He was a funny guy and like anyone else I grew up watching him on all those TV shows.”

Of course, Lou’s Carlton feats weren’t just confined to hamming it up with Hanna.

In the aftermath of another ill-fated prediction, he had Carlton ruckman Warren Jones wheel him the length of the famous Carlton trading strip in a wheelbarrow.

On another occasion, he had a vat of spaghetti emptied over him by Mario Bortolotto – which never worried Lou, who once famously said that the nice thing about being born ugly is that as you get older you don’t get any worse.



Mario Bortolotto empties a vat of spaghetti on Lou Richards. (Photo: HWT)

Amid the rigmarole, it would be easy to gloss over Lewis Thomas Charles Richards’ 14 seasons and 250 senior matches with Collingwood, amongst them the winning 1953 grand final team he captained.

Perhaps Lou’s healthy respect for the old foe was based on the fact that it all began with a baptism of fire – his first senior appearance against Carlton at Princes Park, in the 6th Round of the 1941 season.

Carlton prevailed by 17 points in that one, with Paul Schmidt booting five goals from full-forward for the home team and Carlton’s feared captain Bob Chitty reported and subsequently suspended for elbowing Lou’s uncle Alby Pannam.

Little Louie didn’t emerge unscathed either, as he colourfully recounted to Ian McDonald in his 1963 book Boots and All.

“I played my first game against Carlton and when I was resting in the forward pocket a chap by the name of Charlie McInnes was minding me. If you reckon present-day back pocket John Benetti has big thighs you should have seen Charlie; he made Benetti look like the thin man at the circus,” Lou wrote.



Carlton’s Charlie McInnes (left) and the fearsome Rod 'Madcap' McLean, join Richmond’s Dick Harris in pursuit of the pigskin, MCG circa 1930s. (Photo: Luke Morgan)

“Not only did he use those thighs and hips to full advantage, he gave me a decent initiation into League football. As soon as the game started, he turned and swung a terrific punch which exploded in my face.

“That’s how I started, with a cut nose and mouth. It was a lesson I never forgot.”