[dropcap]L[/dropcap]ast July, in Orange County Ca, Catherine Kieu Becker cut off her husband’s penis and tossed it in the garbage disposal after he told her he wanted a divorce. The incident was described on national television by Sharon Osborne (wife of Ozzie Osborne) as “delightful.” The other women who co-hosted the program joked about it as their audience roared with laughter.

On October 11, 2011, just a few miles up the freeway, Scott De Kraai opened fire in a hair salon in Seal Beach, Ca, where his ex-wife worked. This occurred a day after she had sought a restraining order against him as part of an ongoing custody dispute over their young son. So far, I haven’t heard the word “delightful” used in connection with the incident. But why not?

If it is funny and “delightful” when a woman commits an act of violence against a man, why isn’t it just as funny and “delightful” when a man commits violence against a woman?

By all accounts, Mr. De Kraai was a friendly, responsible man, who had suffered a serious injury attempting to save the life of a female coworker some years back. He was a hero, even though his attempt failed. He has been described by those who knew him as being a good father, totally devoted to his son. Even his wife’s attorney described him as mild mannered. But he had been angry over the ongoing custody battle, though he did apparently have shared custody, at least up until the request for the restraining order the day before the shooting. I couldn’t find any information on the outcome of the hearing, so perhaps new information will be forthcoming that can shed some light on the matter.

But one thing I do know is that this morning, Scott De Kraai and Catherine Becker are awaiting trial for their crimes. Both will likely be convicted. But while Mrs. Becker received vocal support and her victim was made the butt of jokes, that will not be the case for Mr. De Kraai and his victim. Nor should it be. Violence against anyone is a serious matter. No one should think it is “delightful” or funny.