I alluded to this in a different thread (can’t remember which one) and have had several requests for this spell (spells, really - this is a two-parter).

I’ve decided to just post it here for easy reference.

I’ve only had three relationships. All three of my exes crawled right back - but I only did magick on one (the other two realized pretty damn quickly that they’d never do any better than me). And he treated me so badly that he absolutely deserved it.

First things first: I strongly recommend against trying to get your ex back on a permanent basis. I tried to do that at first and it didn’t work. When I decided to lure him back so I could give him a taste of his own medicine, THAT worked. Remember, they’re your ex for a reason.

When you try to get your ex back for good (especially if you are still talking to them), you give them all the power. I decided I was in charge and that I was going to make damn sure he never hurt another girl again.

First: poppets of each of us, dressed in scraps of our own clothes. Faced them towards each other, hands bound behind each others’ backs. (Can’t sew? Some occult stores sell poppet kits.)

Second: pictures of each of us, paper clipped together so his face couldn’t look past mine.

Third (and I strongly advise against this in most cases): knot spell to cause impotence. I tied nine knots in a piece of black cord, witches’ ladder style, while stating, and picturing, his punishment for cheating: no sexual response at all unless he was with me, or completely alone and thinking about me. (We had friends in common, so I know that it worked exceptionally well.)

The poppets, photos, and knotted cord were placed in a box in the bottom of a drawer I rarely opened. It helps tremendously to forget you’ve done this stuff.

DO NOT CALL, TEXT, OR EMAIL YOUR EX. This will require some self-discipline, but trust me, it helps.

Part two: breaking his hold over me.

I gathered EVERYTHING from our relationship. Dried roses, movie stubs, CDs…EVERYTHING.

Anything that couldn’t be burned was sold or donated to charity. Then I lit a candle and prepared a heatproof container. (Fire pits are good for this, if you have access to one. I did not, so I picked a night when there was no wind and opened a window for ventilation.)

Love notes? Torn up and burned. Dried roses? Crushed and burned. While this was going on, I was listening to “our” songs and chugging water, focusing on my rage and hurt being turned to ash along with the things I burned.

Drink lots of water during a ritual and you’ll eventually have to take a restroom break. I had to take three…and each time, I poured a little bit of the ash in the toilet first. (Only flush a little bit of ash at a time, especially if you have unreliable plumbing.)

Again…do NOT call, text, or email your ex. Give the spell room to work.

A few weeks later, after a long evening drinking daiquiris with an equally heartbroken friend, I woke up feeling completely healed. It didn’t hurt anymore. (Disclaimer: don’t drink too much after a breakup.)

A couple of months later, he crawled right back. I kept him at arm’s length at first (can’t make it too easy on them) before agreeing to provisionally resume our relationship. When he inevitably failed to keep a promise and didn’t even call me, I cut him off cold, refusing to take his calls and blocking his email. (I’d warned him never to do that to me again…)

A year later, I found some jewelry he’d given me. I’d forgotten about it. The very next night, I walked to the beach, offered it to Venus (since she rules over love AND the sea), and tossed it in the ocean.

He crawled back again, contacting me from a different email address and initially pretending to be a stranger who found my blog. I replied a few times before revealing that I knew it was him and that I couldn’t be with a man who didn’t keep his promises and couldn’t be trusted.

For what it’s worth, he HAD changed, significantly, for the better. I still refused to take him back, but I figured I’d punished him enough and undid the spells.

To cut a long story short, the best way to get your ex back is to not want them back for good.