If Public Security Minister Gilad Erdan is a real Jew, he can’t hold Palestinian bodies for four months because the Jews are a merciful people. And if he proves to be a Jew in any case, then the Jews can’t have a yearning soul as we’ve always been told.

So it is with the Supreme Court justices; for three months they’ve been wrestling with the case of hunger-striking administrative detainee Mohammed al-Qiq, who at the moment is a bag of bones hovering between life and death, until thank God they have apparently agreed to grant him life. Either the justices are masquerading as Jews, or the Jews are just like everyone else.

To uphold the Zionist ethos, I have decided, with a heavy heart, that both the justices and Erdan are pretend Jews. More accurately, they are moles. That’s a pretty harsh decision, but what won’t we do to preserve the Jewish national honor?

I promise you – and I’m being serious this time – that after the occupation is over, something that we will yet live to see, these people will be denounced as those who dragged the Jews through the mud of the occupation by providing it with political, legal and moral support. They’d better start looking for an alibi. So, Minister Erdan, if you had any Arab friends in those days when there was no distinction between people or corpses, renew those friendships! That’s not a bad alibi.

Meanwhile, I suggest that the progressive MKs, Jews and Arabs alike, not make so much of an effort to derail the proposed suspension law (which is aimed at expelling Arab MKs). The Jewish state is en route to becoming an apartheid state, so why should you rescue its lost honor? Do you think you are more patriotic than Yair Lapid, Isaac Herzog and Moshe Kahlon?

On the contrary, every Jewish and Arab democrat must whisper to himself the blessing, “for having sustained us and brought us to this moment.” After all, back then they claimed that the Arabs fled and that’s why the Nakba took place. What will they say now, when Arabs are fighting to be in the Knesset and the Jews are closing the gate? Congratulations! The mask has come off.

Now let’s see Prof. Ruth Gavison explain to us how a state can be both Jewish and democratic, both cream and pork. It seems that gentile dishes appeal to intellectuals’ palates. Unfortunately, right now the choice is this: either a democratic state in which Arabs are equal, or a state whose institutions are closed to Arabs. The Arabs are the light that will illuminate the Jewish state. The paths of light are convoluted.

And if we’re dealing with intellectuals, is there not a single righteous one among them that will publicly wonder what’s wrong with a reality that spurs a girl to try to stab a Jew? Does she hate the Jew because of his Judaism, or because he is an occupier? After all, this girl never met a Jew who wasn’t an occupier. It’s time to start thinking of this girl as a victim before condemning her as a terrorist and rushing to empty a magazine into her slim body.

In conclusion I will say that it is both the right and the duty of Balad MKs to visit the families of the stabbers and request that their bodies be returned. My problem is that they’re playing a game; if it works, great. If not, then they will say they didn’t mean it. MK Basel Ghattas told Nahum Barnea of Yedioth Ahronoth that they had planned to visit quietly, but one of the activists got too enthusiastic and posted a photo of their meeting with the families online. Then Ghattas refused to name the activist.

The next day Ghattas told Barnea that many young people had joined Balad because of the right’s incitement campaign. Oh, bravo! The forces of progress are sweating to try to repel the right-wing attacks, and there’s Balad claiming to benefit.

“Responsibility” is the key word in the Arab population’s struggle. Somehow it has disappeared from the lexicon.