In 2016, I spent too much time distracting myself from the pain of being by focusing instead on Bravo’s Real Housewives franchise. If I were a wiser person, I instead would have spent my year considering the consequences and sociological impact of reality TV, but I’m not and I didn’t, so why let all that time go to waste? Here, instead of something thoughtful, is a breakdown on the best Real Housewives fights of 2016.


Since debuting in 2006, the women of the Real Housewives have gotten in so many feuds—over cancer scams, whether or not Bethenny can call herself a chef, bullhorns at reunions, prostitution whores, etc.—that you’d think they’d have the formula down pat by now. Not so! Some of the casts, even the more seasoned ones, still flounder when it comes to creating drama (looking at you, Beverly Hills) and the new casts (Dallas and Potomac) can’t seem to find their footing or make viewers give a fuck.

So what, in 2016, adds up to a good Real Housewives fight? In the supercut above, we sought to break it down for you and future ‘wives so that we never have something as bleak and boring as Yolanda Hadid’s Munchausen debacle ever again. May the ladies of the lesser franchise heed our advice and follow in the footsteps of Orange County, Atlanta, New York, and (sleeper hit) Melbourne.


It’s going to be a rough next few years and we’re going to need our emotional bloodsport for many reasons, particularly because—who knows?—Vicki Gunvalson could run for president in 2017 and we’re gonna want to know her gameplay.