By the end of the day today we will have seen all 20 of the 2018 Premier League teams in action for the first time. That’s enough for us to be able to form some basic opinions of each team and the way they play.

Have you heard the expression “There’s a @dril tweet for everything”? It’s true. @dril is the undisputed king of “weird Twitter,” an anonymous internet celebrity who posts brilliant nuggets of foul-mouthed, intentionally (?) misspelled, bizarre content. The tweets are perfect non-sequiturs that, his followers believe, you can apply to virtually any situation.

So why not test that theory? We (and by “we” I mean mostly The Sleeper’s Sleep, but also me and a few other Carty Free staffers) scoured @dril’s timeline and found what we think are the perfect tweets that represent each of the 20 teams in this season’s 2018-19 Premier League. Why? Well, mostly because we were bored one day. But also because we could.

Enjoy, or we will slowly shrink and transform into corn cobs.

Bournemouth

Brighton & Hove Albion

Cardiff City

Fulham

Huddersfield Town

(I couldn’t decide)

Newcastle United

Watford

West Ham

Wolverhampton

BONUS — Non-Premier League @dril tweets

It’s not just Premier League clubs that have perfect Dril tweet matches. We found a couple of others that seemed appropriate to share.

Real Madrid

Aston Villa

Millwall

LA Galaxy