With the utmost modesty I can claim, with the aid of audiences up and down the country, to have created the ultimate political manifesto. Each night audience members are asked to suggest policies, which are then discussed and voted upon. The policy that wins the most votes joins the manifesto. On Tuesday night the crowd decided upon two policies: to re-nationalise the railways and to introduce a maximum wage – although to be fair, fining people who wear Ugg boots came a close third.

The manifesto has built up over the year and contains policies varying from "MPs should not be paid salaries but loans, like students. MPs often get highly paid jobs on leaving parliament as a consequence of having attended parliament, they should therefore repay the loan" to "the introduction of a Prohibition of Deception Act" and "Dog owners who do not clean up after their dogs should be forced to wear the offending turd as a moustache for the rest of the day".

"What is to happen to these policies of rare genius, Mark?" I hear you cry in a desperate and needy whimper. The answer and the wait are over. The Manifesto has a candidate standing in the election.

Ebury Press (publishers of the People's Manifesto) agreed to fund a candidate, and so we began the selection process. People were invited to submit themselves as candidates (via a website) and asked various probing questions about their policy priorities, what local issues should be highlighted and details of their campaign strategy.

The selection process started with the question "Why do you want to stand as an MP?" Anyone who responded using the words "public service", "duty" or "needs of the community" was immediately rejected. My favourite answer, incidentally, was: "I'm not doing much for the next five years."

However, one candidate really stood out, a chap called Danny Kushlick – who, I am delighted to say, is now the official candidate for the People's Manifesto. Kushlick is going to stand in Bristol West, which is a three-way battle with a Lib Dem majority (recent boundary changes are thought to favour the Lib Dems).

Kushlick is a great candidate, with a history of campaigning. Readers of the Guardian might recognise his name, as he has written in these pages on the issue of drug prohibition. This is Kushlick's subject, having worked firstly as a drug counsellor before going on to help set up Transform, the advocacy and research foundation working to end the global war on drugs and replace it with an effective, humane and just system of regulation and control. Not surprisingly, his main policy is the legalisation of all drugs, but he has selected four other policies he sees as priorities:

1. The introduction of a Tobin tax (Robin Hood tax) on foreign financial transactions.

2. The Daily Mail should be forced to print on the front of every edition the words: "This is a fictionalised account of the news and any resemblance to the truth is entirely coincidental."

3. There should be a referendum before going to war.

4. MPs should have to wear tabards displaying the names and logos of the companies with which they have a financial relationship, like a racing driver.

Kushlick's campaign website and details will be online soon. There is an election rally on 20 April in Bristol at the Metropole: further details to be announced. Anyone wishing to help support Kushlick's efforts in Bristol West should go to the People's Manifesto Facebook page. In the meantime, let us celebrate the first candidate to declare: "The most important 'special relationship' isn't with the US, but with your mum."