On Jan. 21, my husband and I participated in the Women’s March in Reno, Nevada. As we did, I looked around and wondered just how many of us weren’t women — or men, for that matter. The temperature was in the 40s, which wasn’t as cold as winters in my hometown Chicago, but unfortunately still not warm enough for my T-shirt — too cute to be binary — to be on display.



Nonbinary genders are those that fall outside of the traditional “male” and “female” gender categories. Everyone is either “designated female at birth” (DFAB) or “designated male at birth” (DMAB), and sometimes nonbinary individuals use those as identifiers. Other times you’ll hear a different term: genderqueer, or genderfluid, or pangender — the list goes on. According the updated criteria for gender dysphoria in the DSM-V, the American Psychiatric Association’s classification and diagnostic guide, “transgender” now includes any gender identity not given at birth, encompassing nonbinary identities. (The fact that gender dysphoria is classified as a mental illness is problematic.) The important thing to note is no two nonbinary individuals understand and express their genders in the same way.

When I came out as nonbinary in 2015 (I was DFAB but prefer the pronouns they/theirs), I was already acutely aware of our erasure. I personally experienced it daily; I’m a larger individual, and because of my curves, people often assumed I was a woman, never considering the fact that I might not identify as such. Almost every form I came across had either "male" or "female," or sometimes even "transgender male" or "transgender female." When I applied to graduate schools, only one application acknowledged gender identities outside the binary, asking what you were designated at birth and how you identified.

While I’m pleased that binary trans people are gaining more visibility, many nonbinary individuals — myself included — feel forgotten, especially in activism. We may support the mission of the women’s movement — and many of us do — but we don’t always feel like it supports us.

The women’s movement is absolutely necessary and empowers women everywhere, giving them a voice and urging them not to remain silent and compliant in the face of unjust conditions. But every time I see a "the future is female" shirt, or drawings of uteri, or pussy hats, or "nasty women," or even "nevertheless, she persisted," I feel erased.

Last week’s A Day Without A Woman, held on International Women’s Day and orchestrated by the organizers of the Women’s March, was supposed to be about highlighting the importance of women in and out of the workforce. (Acknowledging that not every woman can just take the day off, the organizers also encouraged women to wear red in solidarity and only shop at small, women- or minority-owned businesses.) It’s clear that the organizers are beginning to respond to the criticism about trans exclusion at the Women’s March by explicitly using words like “women identified” and mentioning the disproportionate violence and discrimination trans women face. But by focusing on a female identity, despite the movement purportedly being about gender equality as a whole, many nonbinary individuals who support the cause feel excluded.

I wondered if my reaction was unreasonable, so I asked some of my nonbinary friends if they felt the same way.

“As a nonbinary trans person, I always struggle with joining anything that says it’s for women only,” said my friend Alaina. “It’s hard not to wonder if the space is for you.”

“I am a genderfluid, fabulous, genderqueer nonbinary person,” my friend Adrian told me. “I shouldn’t have to identify as a woman to have the sexism I experience recognized. Some groups actively deny our existence/are out to harm us. Some groups say they'd like to include us but never even say the word 'nonbinary.' Some groups mention us but don't do the work to make sure we're truly included. Don't just invite us to the table; place us at the head and make sure we're able to eat. Because ‘women-only’ feminism isn't feminist at all."

Do we support the overall movement? Absolutely. It is clear that it becomes more inclusive with time, centering women of color as the co-chairs after initial pushback and moving toward trans inclusivity. Indeed, on the Day Without A Woman FAQ, they even explicitly mentioned trans women and gender nonconforming individuals as welcome. But do we feel excluded? Absolutely. The term "gender nonconfirming" is not synonymous with "nonbinary." Gender nonconformity (GNC) is doing something outside of typical gender roles; for example, a man who identifies as a man wearing makeup or a dress is GNC. But that doesn’t make him nonbinary. Given the diversity of our genders and gender expression, no one expects the organizers to magically “know” our individual wishes or accommodations. But we do ask them to include us in the conversation.

So how do we make the movement more inclusive? First, make sure the inclusion of nonbinary and binary trans individuals is at the forefront and explicit. Say our names, but also invite us into the conversations, amplifying our voices instead of speaking for us. Share your platform; we don’t expect you to know what you need, so let us step in. Saying “you’re welcome to join us” is a lot different than saying “we are also fighting for you, so let’s make sure you have what you need.” Make sure it’s clear that not everyone who has a uterus or vagina is a woman, and not all women have uteri or vaginas. Gently remind people to use gender-neutral language where they can, saying “friends/folks” instead of “fellow women.” Be specific about the problems we're confronting: Champion trans rights not just saying “women are not treated fairly in our societies” but also “nonbinary individuals experience erasure on top of sexism and misogyny.” (According to the 2015 U.S. Transgender Survey, 66 percent of nonbinary people avoided asking their employer to refer to them by the correct pronoun in order to avoid discrimination.) Fighting for our inclusion doesn’t mean excluding other issues — view us as part of the overall fight.

The movement has already started talking about the societal discrimination against people of color and other marginalized groups, but it’s not enough to say all efforts are under the banner of fighting for women, not when we can do more. The leaders of the movement must also use their platform to educate people on specific areas. Let’s expose the issues and erasures individuals with disabilities face by centering a day solely on them. Let’s use the platform to highlight facts about single working parents who have been in abusive relationships and are in child custody battles. Let’s talk about queer homelessness, queer suicide, and queer discrimination by partnering with the organizations who fight these issues, publicizing their work and what others can do.

We know our exclusion is not intentional, but that doesn’t mean it’s acceptable. Let’s work to make the movement more inclusive of everyone who is marginalized. Together.

Follow Naseem on Twitter.



This content is created and maintained by a third party, and imported onto this page to help users provide their email addresses. You may be able to find more information about this and similar content at piano.io