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“Our Father” Ringtone Conveniently Goes Off During “Our Father,” Keeping Everyone In Key

Topeka, KS–According to sources at Our Lady Star of the Sea Parish in Topeka, Kansas, a phone belonging to an unidentified person went off early Sunday morning during the Our Father, despite the pastor’s repeated requests that all parishioners turn off their cell phones. “Isn’t it just a switch to turn your phone to vibrate?” Fr. Howard Davidow asked reporters. “I mean, my phone has this nifty little button, and when you move it up, it silences the phone…and when you move it down, it turns the sound back on. But maybe I shouldn’t be so hard on my parishioners. I mean, maybe I just have this magical phone that no one else has, that has these special superpowers and super-features that can silence within a millisecond.” But although frustrated, Davidow did go on to say that though the unidentified phone did go off during the Our Father, that the ringtone, by the grace of God, happened to be the Our Father ringtone, telling reporters that it also just so happened to have perfectly coincided with the part of the prayer they were singing at that very moment, miraculously and temporarily transforming his tone-deaf congregation into a choir of angels. “Well as St. Paul says, ‘In all things God works for the good of those who love him.'”