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Don’t call it a comeback, I’ve been here for years! Is there a better way to return after months of absence than by bringing you with a comic about Zeus trying to bang some hapless mortal woman? I say there is not!

Poor Europa, abducted by a god disguised as a bull, and then ravished by that same god disguised as an eagle. Zeus was one messed up fella! Either that, or the folks writing stories about him had some really intense feelings about animals that they did not hide very well. Maybe it was a bit of both?

You’d at least think that, having seduced so many mortal women, he’d have perfected a better technique at some point, but he always seems to manage to just get more ridiculous.

For those of you unfamiliar with the story of Europa, she is another in a long line of mortal conquests by the immortal Zeus. In the tale, Europa is a beautiful young maiden (aren’t they all?) of noble birth, most often a descendent of Io, one of Zeus’s former lovers. One day, while out with her friends in the fields, she spots a beautiful white bull mixed in with her father’s herds. Entranced by this stunning creature, she climbs upon its back against the urgings of her friends. At once, the bull runs off, carrying her across the land and out to the sea. The Zeus-bull swims with her on his back the isle of Crete where he reveals his identity to the young woman. In most versions of the story, he shows her his true form as a man, though in some he turns into an eagle to ravish her for whatever reason. There are also some forms of the story where Zeus takes the form of an eagle from the beginning and flies off with her to Crete.

After telling Europa that he is, indeed, the chief of the gods, Zeus beds the young woman. Having made love to her, Zeus returns to Olympus but, in most versions of the story, leaves her with several gifts: Talos, an enchanted man made of bronze that guarded the island, Laelaps, an incredible hunting dog, and a javelin that never missed its target. Europa later gave birth to three famous sons, among them was the legendary King Minos who would later have the labyrinth built to hide the deadly Minotaur. Europa is generally considered to be the first Queen of Crete and her sons, the first Kings.

After all was said and done, Zeus marked his union with Europa by creating the image of the bull in the stars which we know today as Taurus. A strange way to put a notch on one’s bedpost, to be sure.

Unlike many of his other lovers, Europa was one of the few that actually managed to escape the wrath of Zeus’s wife, Hera, though why this would be is rarely discussed. Suffice to say the girl was lucky.

Well, as lucky as someone who gets abducted by a god disguised as a bull and carried off to an island only to be ravished by said god can be. I guess it was worth it in the end?

I wanted to say thanks to everyone for your continued support! I’m sorry I’ve been away for so long but life has been hugely in flux over the last few months. I’ve been getting a lot more work coming in and it’s hard to balance that with improving my life and personal projects. Needless to say it’s been a crazy ride. It’s also a little intimidating to try to write comics that I’m happy with. The more time goes by, the more scared I get of disappointing you fine folks. All I can say is that I will do my best to update more regularly and I will try not to worry so much as it tends to just get in the way of actually getting things done.

Much love and sorry for making some of you worry! <3