(Disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. Learn to take a joke; you’ll live longer.)

LAHORE – Global megastar and A*-grade actor Shaan Shahid has expressed his disappointment over the fact that stars from across the border are not as pluralistic and tolerant as those in Pakistan.

In an exclusive interview with The Dependent, Shaan said he wishes that Bollywood celebrities were as woke as Lollywood.

“I wish Bollywood stars were self-critical, progressive and low on hyper-nationalism like us. Unfortunately, while we have a long history of self-reflection and pointing out ills in our country, Indians are just jingoists and populists,” he said.

Shaan also called out the hypocrisy of those celebrities who were constantly asking those from other countries to condemn the wrongs of their states while actually lauding their own state for similar, if not worse, abuses.

“It’s okay if your work, or whatever constraint you have, doesn’t allow you to do political commentary that might result in backlash at home. But please then don’t expect others to express dissent in their countries, just because it’s an issue that you can openly condemn from your country,” he said.

Shaan’s upcoming film ‘Woke Gujjar Tay Feminist Majaajan’ is expected to release next year, where he will be seen expressing solidarity with the Aurat March.