With a variety of projects in the works to mount a manned mission – and in some cases colonisation – of Mars, many of us have dreamed of getting off Earth to live on the Red Planet. But according to retired astronaut James F Reilly, known more commonly as JR, it’s not just the harsh conditions that will make the experience challenging.

“You’re not going to be able to pick up the phone and talk to anybody, because it’s a 20 minute one-way satellite transmission,” he said at a press event in London’s Wembley Stadium earlier this year. “So you’ll be able to do text messages and video – not even chat. You’ll send your message and then about an hour or so later you’ll get one back, so it won’t be real-time communications.”

Reilly, who spent time working on a research base in Antarctica and on deep submergence vehicles for the US Navy before travelling to both Mir and the International Space Station with NASA, also said that the lack of Earthly sights and sounds would be a bigger issue for visitors to the Red Planet than many realise.

“It’s the sounds and things that we see there, it’s the life all around us, because the surface of Mars, the surface as we see it is dead, there’s nothing on it,” he said. “It’s like living in the driest desert ever. In fact the driest place on Earth is wetter than the wettest part of Mars.”

Discussing the likely experiences of visitors on a three-year stay – the projected mission time based on the way NASA plans to get to Mars – Reilly highlighted the lack of flora and low light as particular issues.

“You’re going to miss the green stuff; what we saw out there on the field,” he said, referring to the football stadium’s pitch. “You’re going to be gone for three years, and you’ve got to figure out how to get that before you can even come home for 30 minutes in a Star Trek holodeck experience of some kind, so that you can carry that experience with you and revisit where your home is when you need to.

“The other thing about Mars is it always looks bright in our pictures that come back from the rovers that are on the surface, but it’s not, it’s actually about half that. The energy of the sun as it hits Mars is almost exactly half of what we see here. So it’s like living in a permanent twilight on Mars.”

Those living in crowded cities may actually find the experience familiar.

“People here in London would probably adapt to it very well – it’s usually pretty cloudy and gloomy here and you’re used to lots of people being around you at very close quarters,” he said. “But it’ll probably be an international group just like the International Space Station, so I expect we won’t see single member countries doing this as much as it’ll be an international project.”

There is also the matter of fresh food and ingredients for other products such as skincare, which will need to be grown from scratch using resources brought from Earth.

“You’re going to grow everything. Aloe Vera and those kinds of things are probably going to be grown as part of your permanent garden on the surface of Mars,” explained Reilly.

However, it won’t all be deprivation and hardship – Reilly suspects that visitors on such a long stay will develop forms of entertainment akin to those of Earth.

“Alcohol is probably one of those things that if we don’t have it, we’ll probably learn to make it,” he said. “Because you’ll be gone three years, and I’d certainly like to sit back and watch the Martian sunset with a little single malt in my hand – maybe make it a beer. We’ll probably find ways of going close to that.”

Those hoping to accompany their space beer with some cheese sticks will, however, be disappointed. Sending cows into space, unsurprisingly, is not considered the best use of resources.

“I don’t know about cheese and true beer, you might have to come up with some other variant that we would use,” he said. “The bovine part of this exploit is a pretty big draw on resources, so you won’t be able to carry those with you.”

The next issue of Factor, out later this week, will feature an extended article on James Reilly’s experiences travelling to the ISS on Space Shuttle Atlantis