Interdimensional RED-Coded Contract

Once Upon a Time…

Bidwell made me a juicy steak for breakfast and Reddy delivered his newest report on Mann Co. products, it was just a tuesday like every other tuesday.

"Mr. Hale?" Spy interrupted.

Oh for the love of- What do you want, masky?

"Could you get on with it, we're not interested in knowing how your day went. We want to know how you got into this world."

No, screw you. You guys asked for the long version, so I'm doing the long version alright? Alright. So anyway - Bidwell made me a juicy steak for breakfast and Reddy gave me his report. Then as I was eating that juicy steak my phone suddenly rang out.

"Saxton Hale here!" I said.

"Hale."

"Oh good morning, Helen." I relaxed a bit in my chair, my juicy steak now forgotten and growing cold. Bidwell took it from the table and disposed of it in the trash. "How is defending my company from an army of robots going? Do you need me to go out there and beat some for you?"

"They disappeared, Hale."

"Oh, they did?" I answered, before frowning. "Who did?"

"The morons you hired to protect your company. Their Engineer sent them… to a different world."

"New world, huh?" I scratched my nose and wondered if she's messing with me… then I remembered that she never kids around. "Do they have kangaroos there?"

Now that I think about it, do you really have kangaroos here? It's important for me because... alien kangaroos, people. Alien kangaroos.

"Mr. Hale… Sorry to break it to you, but I've never heard of a… kangaroo? Before." Mina said.

…

...Damn.

"...I'll need Bidwell to lead an expedition team, while you go with Miss Penling and new mercs to capture the teleporter Team Fortress left in Decoy."

"Will there be a fight?"

"...Yes."

"Alright."

Grinning like a child during Smissmas, I put down the phone and prepared myself to punch some tin cans. That was… roughly a month before I was sent here. More less, I didn't bother keeping track of it.

"Hold on hold on hol' on, a month? What?" Scout interrupted.

...Yes, a month. What about it, moron? Do you not have calendars here?

"What? No! We have that! But we've been here for like… 2 weeks tops!"

Huh? That's weird. Moving on!

It was again tuesday when I received another call from the Administrator. Without Bidwell I had to make Reddy make me steaks… let me tell you, he ain't good at it but I'm too lazy to do them myself in the morning. Nor do I want to spend cash on a chief.

"Please, get on with the story, Mr. Hale." Spy interrupted.

"Who is the Administrator?" Mina asked.

That is a long story in and of itself, I'll tell you for another 20,000 credits.

"I… ran out of money."

Too bad-

"The Administrator was-OOMPHF?!" Hale wrapped his hands around Spy's throat.

Uh, uh, uh frenchy. Not a word, mate. Unless one of you coughs up 20,000 credits.

So anyway, this tuesday I was a little more sad and angsty over losing my aide and chef. But the Administrator told me that everything was ready and I am to meet with Miss Paduling in Decoy again. We didn't stay there for long because we got into the teleporter, and poof! We landed in-

"A city?" Miss Pendulum blinked in confusion.

An industrial-looking city at that! Bad air, black buildings (I'm serious, somebody must've dumped black paint all over the city!) and shady people were everywhere! Just like Germany during World War II.

"World… War?" Mina repeated.

"Yes, we had two world wars." Spy confirmed with a nod.

Yeah, those were the days. I still remember when those pesky nazis invaded Australia, and then their entire army got beaten by emus! Hah! This was a good day! Then we Australians stole their ships, rushed for their capital, and then I punched Hitler with his giant robot suit in the face before getting back home. Yeah… that was a good day...

…

"Umm… Mr. Hale?" Mina called out, breaking Hale out of his reverie.

Wuh? Wah?! Ah right, the story!

So me and Miss Puzzling walked down the streets of this city, and I have to tell you: every bloody bloke there wore black! It was like all of their people picked 1 color and stuck to it, there wasn't a single guy who had a different color. Everything was black: from clothes, to buildings, to streets-!

"Streets are always black, pal." Scout deadpanned, but a glare from the Australian made him freeze.

"Hmm… it appears that you and Miss… Padding? Had landed in Lastation." Said Mina.

Lastation, huh? Well they're certainly last in the muscle department. Everyone there was so tiny and smol that even Miss Pissing felt like a giant among dwarfs. You're actually small too, girl.

"Hmph! I am actually quite tall for my people." Mina crossed her arms.

You're smaller than what we consider a dwarf in Australia…

Back to my story though, Miss Pending-

"Are you doing this on purpose?" Mina asked, catching Hale off-guard.

Eh? Doing what on purpose?

"That 'Miss Pending' thing, you switched her name… 5-6 times already." The Oracle pointed out.

You serious? Hold on, I-

...You're right. I vaguely remember that woman constantly telling me her name. I think it was Miss Penendet!

"That's not even remotely close." Mina deadpanned.

And I don't care. Moving on!

So after pointlessly roaming this Lastation place for an unchecked amount of time, all while receiving envious looks from male and female bystanders, Miss whatever-her-name-was started asking them questions. The first thing she wanted to visit was a library, and finding that was remotely easy. Civvies here were nice enough to point us in the right direction, then they asked me how much can I lift, if I will finally wear a goddamn shirt or if they can touch my muscles.

"By the way, can I?" Scout raised his hand.

Sure, knock yourself out. Enjoy the mannliness you won't ever achieve, mate.

Ignoring a stickman molesting my bicep for now. When we arrived at this hippie nest I was thinking about burning this place down, but Miss Penny warned me to not take any unnecessary attention. So I listened like a good boy and stayed outside while Miss Pyro did what Miss Pennies does.

I'll admit to the fact I broke a few windows and contemplated burning it down after we got what we came here for. Until then I was killing time doing push ups and lifting a car at the same time.

"Hi, dude." A peculiar figure suddenly approached me. I placed the car down and stood up.

"Hello, how can I help you?"

She was shady as a shady person could be. With a black hoodie with a weird red and yellow heart on it. Their hood looked kinda like a mouse and-

"We get it man, stop." Scout said.

Alright then…

She pulled out a small pouch and opened it, and there were some weird chips inside. "Do you want some Arfoire chips? They're free." Now that was a deal I could get behind, but I had to make sure of something.

"Free, huh? Then what's the catch?"

"There's no catch." She shrugged. "I'm here just to spread these things."

"In that case, I'll take your entire stock." I pointed at her. I was confident that if I took everything she had, then I could sell it later to some idiots. That's how you make business.

"You… took those Arfoire chips?" Mina breathed out, sounding as if Hale betrayed her.

Yup, dunno what they do but I still have 'em. Now that I think about it, that wasn't a smart idea. Because the moment she gave me the bag, some kid just had to stick her nose where it didn't belong.

"Halt!"

Now, I must admit I didn't actually expect seeing something like that. I mean, she was flying and pointing that oversized cannon of hers at me. I was surprised to see a scrawny kid like her carry such a big gun. I looked at the chip dealer, but they disappeared when that kid arrived. It was just me and her now.

And oh boy, she was pissed for some reason.

"Spreading Arfoire chips is illegal, you know! If you surrender and give up those chips I might consider giving you a lenient sentence."

She was cocky, which was something I liked about her. But she also threatened me, which was something I didn't like about her. Miss Panpan told me to not gather any attention but hey! She didn't say anything about self-defense.

Also I thought she would make for good entertainment, I mean she could fly and carry that cannon with those noodles of hers, you'd think she could actually put up a fight!

I was wrong and disappointed by the reality, but that's for later.

We went back and forth, only with words for now. And her big stick up her ass was really starting to piss me off, she was constantly looking down on me and tried to order me around and all that stuff. Meanwhile I was waiting for her to scram, attack me or Miss Peanut to come back so we can get going. Then all of that went out of the window when she called me a pervert.

"...You could also wear a shirt or something. Seriously! Are you a pervert or something?"

This was an insult I just couldn't take lying down, my status as a mann demanded retribution for this grievous slander. If it was anything else I would just shrug it off, but that one was unacceptable.

"Alright, that's it! C'MERE YOU LITTLE-!"

I had to give it to her, she lasted a second longer than most of my opponents. She was also pretty feisty too. But I was pissed over that pervert comment, so I was too pissed off to enjoy that fight. A shame, that.

"You… fought her?" Mina raised her eyebrow.

Yup, I won too. After dropping that hippie nest on top of her… just don't ask about it. It was an accident.

"How could you… drop a building on someone, by accident?" Mina stared at him blankly.

…Very carefully. I told you to not ask about it and you still asked. What's wrong with you?

"I'm just curious." The Oracle sniffed.

"Anyway." Spy interrupted. "What happened next?"

Alright, so after our fight there was screaming everywhere and what-I-think-was-a-police pointing their weapons at me and ordering me. You know, a typical mess after someone brings down an entire building on someone.

So after beating up that flying kiddo, I was surrounded by the police. You know what I did?

"Punched them all to hell?" Scout asked.

No little man, I grabbed Miss Purple out of the rubble and booked it as fast as I could. They tried chasing after me, but they wouldn't be able to catch a turtle even with a head start! So getting away was easy and they didn't bother after a while.

"You escaped Lastation's forces? How?" The Oracle stated, a bit bewildered.

With my legs. I ran and jumped towards west until my Australian senses were tingling, alerting me of a strong opponent nearby. That's where I found you guys!

Saxton Hale finished his story with a goofy grin, "And the rest you guys already know. C'mon, are you satisfied now?"

"Umm…" Mina was deep in thoughts. "No, I don't think so, but it'll have to do. Thank you for your cooperation."

"As long as you're paying, lady." The CEO stood up and dusted off his pants. "Now sorry kids, got more nature to fight with." He bent his legs.

"Brave Jump!"

With a chalk in his hand and a happy song on his lips, Medic drew patterns on the floor of his study. His own trump card, something that none of these fools have seen. He couldn't wait to see his audience's faces.

And they'll come here soon, they're already trying to get in by banging against the metal shutters. Soon they'll break through that, and then they'll have to deal with the Sentry Guns. And then they'll encounter another obstacle on their way, and another and another and another until the survivors eventually reached him.

Then he could show them the true spectacle!

Exactly like his grandfather did!

...Before he died from a heart attack caused by lack of soul, and a heart.

Medic suddenly froze. He just realized something.

Histoire prohibited his team, which included him too, from killing civilians.

...Funds, or his family tradition? That was a hard choice to make, as funds helped his research while a family tradition is, well… a family tradition.

"...Vell, they entered here voluntarily. Zhis is just a case of self-defense." Medic resumed drawing the pattern. But suddenly his hand slipped and the drawing was ruined. "Scheiße." The merc cursed under his breath. Now he had to do the whole ritual all over again. Medic released a tired sigh and went to the bathroom for a wet towel.

When he left his room, Medic noted a distinct lack of people banging against his doors. "Huh?" D-Did they go away? They dared to leave without getting past a single line of defense?! Medic furrowed his brows in anger and went down the stairs, his ritual postponed because of matters of higher priority.

The lobby was… unfortunately untouched. The barricade of furniture stood undamaged and there weren't any bullet holes in the walls. Also all Sentry Guns were accounted for and the lack of angry mob trying to barge in was more apparent now. It infuriated the German.

"Ah, just vhen I thought I could fulfill myfamily- huh?"

He smelled something burning.

Medic blinked, and then rushed for the shutter. It was hot.

"Oooh." Those villagers didn't give up, they changed their strategy. Now instead of getting in and hunting him down by themselves, they tried to burn the whole building down and flush him out. Medic's anger subsided, replaced by a serene smile and relief. The tradition went on, and those fools didn't realize that Pyro lived in this building. His team was prepared for this eventuality.

Their foolishness left Medic with peace of mind, and time to restart the ritual. With giddy steps the merc walked up the stairs and towards the bathroom.

"M-Medic?! Medic?!"

His shoulders dropped and he clicked his tongue in annoyance when IF of all people ran out of the spawn room, with Falcom in tow. Both girls were surprised by the state of the lobby, but they didn't have the luxury of being confused over the sudden renovations nor the upped security.

"Oh, IF? Falcom? Vhat are you doing here?"

"Medic!" Falcom exclaimed and threw her hands into the air. "The building is on fire!"

"Yes." Medic nodded. "So what?"

"We need to get out of here!" IF ordered. "Where's Nepgear?"

"Oh don't vorry, she's safe." Medic waved her off. "Und there is no emergency here."

"But- they're throwing bombs! This building is going to burn down!" Falcom actually took Medic by his shoulders, but the mercenary pushed her off.

"Fräulein." He started, readjusting his glasses. "Zhis is zhe building vhere Pyro lives. Do you think ve vouldn't be prepared for an inferno with an arsonist around?"

The adventurer deflates a little. "N-No- but-"

"There's no need to vorry for me, mein freund. I vas vaiting for zhis day my entire life."

IF and Falcom shared a troubled look, not knowing what they were supposed to say. "O~kay?" The Guild agent finally states. "Then at least let me take Nepgear to the Basilicom, if only to ease Histoire's mind. She's been worried ever since you got sieged."

"I see." The mercenary nodded. "But unfortunately Fräulein Nepgear is hooked up to zhe Medi-Gun, it vould be better if ve left her alone."

IF sighed at the news. "I see, then at least I'll tell her you have the situation under control." Then she blinked, as one detail caught up to her. "W-What was that about waiting for this day your entire life?"

Medic grinned. "Vell, standing against an angry mob with pitchforks and torches is something of a family tradition."

"Right." IF dryly replied. "We'll be going now. Just- take care of Gear, alright?"

"She's in safe hands, don't vorry." He waved his hand as IF and Falcom took a teleporter back to the Basilicom. With no more distractions, Medic returned to the task at hand - the ritual.

He took 5 steps before an explosion shook the building, sending a surprised Medic onto the floor.

"Vhat the?!" Medic turned his head towards the main entrance. The bottom of the shutter was blown off, but the rest held. Fortunately the gap was too small to pass through but-

"Watch out! The bastard has turrets inside!"

"Bombs! Throw bombs! Burn it from inside!"

"Get him! And then Lady Nepgear will be ours!"

"Yeah!"

Someone threw a bottle into the lobby, it rolled all the way towards his barricade while the Sentry Guns remained idle. Then someone fired a gun and everything exploded into flames.

"I got it! It's burning!"

Medic had to praise their tenacity and creative thinking, they were just like his father described them. Which became a good reason for him to rush upstairs and get started on redoing the entire ritual from scratch. He outright kicked the doors open, took what he needed and rushed back to his study.

These fools won't know what hit them.

"Umm… are you sure?"

"Yes."

"But… wouldn't that make things worse?"

"Nu uh uh. Please listen to the nurse on board."

One of the pilots and Compa argued back and forth. The subject of their argument was a small lever, which turned on the ship's generator, which was sloppily connected to two nails hammered into Engineer's skull.

The pilot sighed and tried to change Compa's mind. "Ma'am, I know you're trying to help and I respect it, but this thing will kill-" She looked at the body of Engineer, or rather whatever remained of the texan mercenary. "-make this thing even worse."

"But that's the only thing I need!" Compa argued. "I followed Mr. Medic's lessons, and all that's left is a strong electric current."

"Girl." The Pilot deadpanned. "You cut off his limbs, and then stitched them back together. You used that toilet paper to collect blood off the floor and just threw them inside his chest. You beat his prosthesis with his own wrench for 20 minutes before it broke, then you did it with a hammer. And I still don't know why you brought that Deathstalker!" She pointed at the bottle lying nearby. "You don't know what you're doing, do you?"

"I do." Compa huffed. "Mr. Medic taught me everything, now lower the lever, assistant." She pointed at the pilot, who just shook her head in defeat and did as asked.

The generator whirred to life and stuff was happening. Lightning formed around the room, and a few of those bolts struck Engineer's corpse. The Pilot watched the spectacle with growing fear as more and more electricity was formed and sent into the dead body, which was shaking from all of that current.

And now Compa applied one more of Mr. Medic's lessons.

"Mwhahahaha! Uahahahaha! It's alive! Alive!" The Nurse practiced her own version of the 'Mad Scientist Laugh'. "...Did I do it right?"

The pilot gave her a blank stare.

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!"

...Then she jumped when Engineer's body screamed and bolted upright, somehow regaining its life and ability to function. The lever went upwards and the generator ceased its activity, leaving an alive body of Engineer.

"Now Mr. Engineer!" Compa called, a bottle of Deathstalker in her hand. "Drink this!" The nurse grabbed his head, and shoved the open bottle into his throat. The merc struggled against the Nurse's grip, but Compa easily overpowered him and emptied the whole bottle in his throat.

Compa backed off and both girls watched the merc convulse on the table as if possessed, before slowly going limp and dead once more. The Pilot probably pissed her pants by now while Compa calmly reattached the cords to the nail. "Now all we need to do is to lower the lever again and Engineer will be back!"

The pilot fell onto her butt, panting. "Wha-What did you do?"

"Hmm-oh!" Compa perked up. "Mr. Medic taught me to always kill the patient when you revive them with this method, because they usually get possessed by evil spirits. The second attempt is safe though!"

"O-Oh…" The pilot breathed out.

The second attempt went a bit smoother, because the Pilot now knew what to expect. She lowered the lever again and the generator whirred to life once more. Electricity started to gather and strike Engineer's corpse. This time Compa chose to omit her Mad Scientist laugh and silently watched the spectacle.

The Pilot braced herself, any second now he's going to start screaming-

"Aaaa-! Khah!? Kuh! Guh!" Engineer started choking. Compa walked up towards the merc and patted his back.

"There, there. Let it all up." She soothed as the merc doubled over onto the floor. The merc started vomiting, filthing the floor with greenish red bile. It didn't look healthy and it wasn't.

"Uuuh…" Engie breathed and wiped his mouth. "Sorry about the floor, ma'am."

"There's no need to worry, welcome back Mr. Engineer!" Compa smiled before grabbing an object from the table. "Umm- sorry but your hard hat didn't survive the crash. But I tried my best!" Engineer blinked when Compa presented him something that could only be described as a bowl made out of toilet paper…

Now Engineer noticed the state he was in. He had his goggles, thankfully. But his hard hat was missing and his uniform was bloodied and shredded.

"Well, thank you girl. I appreciate that." It was better than going with a bare head. And now that he equipped this, Engineer had to admit it that Compa really put some effort into this. She even made a strap to hold it in place. Out of the toilet paper, of course.

With his headgear ready and his heart beating once more, Engineer cracked his knuckles. "Alright y'all. What'cha situation out there?"

"We crashed, we need a dispenser. Follow me so I can show you where to put it."

"Alright, lead the way."

The Pilot didn't react at all when that girl, and the ex-dead person, left the room. The Pilot was simply frozen in shock and trying to figure out how the hell that worked out. Compa led Engineer outside, where Soldier patrolled the area.

"Alright, y'all! I'm back in business!" Engineer said. "Now, where do ya want a dispenser?"

"Welcome back soldier!" Soldier greeted, and pointed at the doors. "Right next to this entry, Spy might need a check-up and our Quick-Fix is broken."

"Ah! I forgot!" Compa gripped her head in shock. "Where is Mr. Spy?"

"Cargo. He's hanging out with Sniper."

"I see-thanks-bye!" Both mercs watched her sprint back into the ship, leaving the recently revived merc with the least qualified member to answer Engie's questions. Engineer sighed and dropped a toolbox into the snow. "Tell me, Soldier. Why didn't our Emergency Re;Spawn System work? Did it break in the crash?" He asked while punching his building with the Gunslinger.

"No. We forgot to take it." Soldier answered.

Engineer stopped punching the dispenser and slowly turned towards his teammate, frowning. "What?"

"We left the E.R.S.S. and our supplies back in our base."

Engineer nodded and finished the dispenser, now he was upgrading it. "I see. And where is the rest of our team?"

"Scout is currently trying to woo Miss Nishizawa." Engineer shook his head and silently wished the boy some luck. "I am here, patrolling the area. Pyro is on the other side, making us a campfire. Demoman is crying in the kitchen." Engie blinked in confusion. "You're here, building a dispenser. Heavy went with Blanc and her kids to the communist land."

"You mean Lowee, right?" The texan cut in.

"Yes, the communist land. We're waiting for those brave souls to return so we can push towards Lowee."

Engineer just let Soldier's argument stand, as he didn't feel like arguing with him.

"Medic stayed behind in Planeptune, and is currently fighting off an angry mob who are sieging our base while also fulfilling his family tradition."

"Uh, Soldier? How do ya know what Doc is doin'?" This one was very specific too, which threw the texan off the loop.

"I know my team and what they're doing." Soldier said. "Sniper is shivering from the cold under 27 layers of clothing, blankets and sheets, and Spy is being checked by Compa." The american finished his report, leaving Engineer unsure what to think of this… detailed report.

"Thanks, partner."

"Anytime, soldier.

Miss Pauling knocked on the doors, in a very specific pattern. After exactly 2 seconds of silence, someone on the other side also knocked in return, before the Administrator's Assistant opened the doors and entered the room.

It was a dark, small room which lacked any features that could be used to describe it. It didn't even have windows. The only thing inside was a single lamp, a simple chair, and a person bound to it. And also several of Admin's goons hiding in the shadows.

The captive was a woman with green hair, and a black dress. She didn't appear to be injured. The keyword here was 'appear'. Miss Pauling checked her clipboard, and read out her name. "Chika Hakozaki." Then she turned her gaze towards the Oracle of Leanbox.

"Or should I say, Linda the Underling."

The ASIC goon's eyes briefly flashed with fear, but Linda suppressed this emotion. "W-Who are you? W-What d-do you want?"

"Your cooperation." Miss Pauling replied.

"Huh?" Linda blinked.

"Your position in this country is rather high, don't you think? A person in charge of the whole nation, with access to all of its resources and information." Miss Pauling monologued. "The ASIC must have big plans for you."

Linda really wanted her to get on with it, and tell her what she wanted, but the Underling also needed to waste as much time as possible for her rescue party. She still has her Chika disguise, there should be someone out there searching for her. ASIC or Leanbox.

"I'll be frank. I want those resources for my employer, and you'll get them for me."

Linda laughed at Miss Pauling's face. "And if I don't?" Linda grinned.

"Then I'll kill you." Miss Pauling stated bluntly and pulled out a cigarette case. "And take over your place."

Linda's eyes widened when Chika Hakozaki stood before her. That weird lady just transformed into the Oracle of Leanbox in front of her eyes, it was a perfect copy of her. Within a second Linda's value went from necessary to expendable, or maybe even a liability for that woman.

Now the Underling grew a little afraid. They didn't need her.

"So, I'm proposing you a deal." The fake Oracle said, using the Oracle's own voice.

Underling struggled against her binds, but they held tight. Additionally, one of her captors raised a gun to her head but 'Chika' stopped him with a wave of her hand. "If you resist, there'll be consequences. Both of us don't want those, but we can recover from that. You don't." Linda understood her words, she only a more convenient way for them to get those resources. She wasn't an essential part of their plan.

She couldn't escape on her own, she either needed to accept that deal of hers or be rescued by someone. Linda sighed and tried to make herself more comfortable. "Well? What is this deal?"

"We will scratch your back, you'll scratch ours and so on. Both parties benefit and both of us pull our weight. To begin with, we went ahead and took care of a threat to your identity."

That's… a rather weird deal her captive presented her. It was too generous for Linda's liking, there must be a catch, or some sort of limit to what sort of favor she could ask them. They even 'helped' her without her knowledge, as the Underling never saw any threats to her identity.

"What threat?"

"The red-haired woman with pigtails." The Fake Oracle checked her clipboard. "Cave. She knew you were acting weird and was investigating."

"And…?" She always shooed Cave off to some missions, she couldn't have known.

"She's dead."

Linda blinked in surprise.

Cave. They killed Cave. Tha-That's bullcrap, that's obviously bullcrap. There's no freakin' way Cave of all people would be killed. Without Linda knowing no less! Chika and Cave were goddamn friends, she would be the first one to know about her death! And she heard nothing!

"Nah, you're lying. Nu-uh." Linda shook her head. Instead of answering verbally, her captor threw a picture onto her lap.

It was Cave Linda recognized, thanks to her maid outfit and distinguishable red hair. She was lying in a shallow pit. And she was riddled with bullets.

…

Holy crap, they actually killed Cave.

These guys were serious, and they were good.

...And now it occured to Linda that there won't be any rescue coming. Her rescue party died without anyone realizing their demise.

This was a very bad situation for her, they planned it perfectly. Chances are no one even knew that she's kidnapped and there wasn't any way for Linda to book it.

Pathetically laughing at her situation, the Underling picked an option that yielded the biggest chance of her survival. ASIC may control the world, but these people right now controlled her life.

"So…" Ah right, they went ahead and did her a favor. It was Linda's turn. "What do you want?"

Fake!Chika placed a small piece of paper on her lap. "This is a list of things we want from you. On paper. In a few days, a Cave will come pick it up, have it ready."

Linda scanned the list as best as she could. Things like information on high ranked members of society would be… maybe not that hard to get. Ownership of a few houses and buildings would be a cakewalk… Information on "Australium and Neptulium?" Linda read aloud, looking at her captive. It was even marked with an exclamation mark.

"Yes." Chika nodded. "I know that ASIC is doing some research on Neptulium, so you - a member of them - would have no problem getting their research papers, and maybe even some samples. Or at least leaking where we could find those."

There's no way she'll get her hands on either of those, it's way outside her rank. The best she could do for them was looking for a place where they might find them.

"Alright, fair enough. What the hell is Australium though?"

"Just find out if it exists here. And if it does, where we can find it."

Linda sensed that her captor's patience was running thin, it would be best for her if she shut up and got to work. "Alright, I'll see what I can do. Can I go now?"

The Fake Oracle nodded to her men, and they cut off her bonds. Linda hissed and rubbed her hurting wrists. Linda wanted to know when the world had become so dangerous to live in. If it's not the organized slaughter of ASIC in Planeptune, then it's the freakin' super-mafia or something in Leanbox.

And now she could either do as they say or die.

Great…

One of the things that Samuel hated about Magnavox, was the fact that you just couldn't find her if you needed her.

Especially in this goddamn labyrinth of hers called the Dimensional Passageway. It didn't help that she spent most of her time there, so good luck to any idiot who needed her help. And today Samuel was this idiot.

"Magnavox, where the hell are you?!" Samuel yelled as he passed the Cyber and Theta Dimensions. Or were those the Super and Zero Dimensions? They were all the same and no one could tell them apart, besides Magnavox… somehow.

Imagine an endless dark void, filled with billions of alternate variations of the same world, unique only by the small details. And somewhere inside that endless spaghetti of Gamindustris was a single CPU that you couldn't track by her shares because it was everywhere.

Which was why Samuel Neikan was forced to wander around, hoping that he would find the True Goddess within this millenia, because he couldn't complete his next objective without her.

"Magnavox? Are you there?"

There was no answer.

The Overseer sighed. He would've better chances of finding her if he started throwing explosives around, maybe a possibility of damaging one of her creations would get her running towards him. But that would be a bad plan, because a mad Magnavox is a bad situation. And also he didn't have Fay around, so he didn't even have any explosives to begin with.

…

Samuel stared blankly at the NEO Hyper Dimension. Then he looked back at the way he came from, before looking again at his dimension.

"How did I get here?" Samuel questioned aloud. He rubbed his eyes in case he was just seeing things, but yup. It was his dimension alright. How he got there, he had no idea. He was walking forward this entire time, he didn't remember ever turning back. Were these halls looping?

"Magnavox?"

Someone embraced him from behind and whispered into his ear.

"Boo!"

"..." The Overseer turned his head around and saw Magnavox's shit-eating grin. He shrugged her off and readjusted his suit, internally cheering for finally finding her. "Those halls are looping or something?"

"Yup!" Magnavox confirmed. "They also extend whenever I create a new dimension."

"You could create better pathways. I'm getting lost just by looking for you." Samuel deadpanned. "Imagine what would happen if there was an emergency going on."

Magnavox turned away with embarrassment, scratching her neck and laughing awkwardly as she didn't have any rebuttal. She wore a modified miko outfit, with silver color and exposed armpits. Her hair was silver too. Her favorite color would be easy to guess.

"Okay, banter aside. What can I help you with?"

The Overseer pulled out a thick book. "Recently I found some interesting information that I never heard about during my studies. So I hit the books again." He explained, opening the book titled 'Hyper Dimension: I'. Then he skipped a few pages until he reached just before Neptune's birth. "And I found this." Samuel pulled out a knife and cut a page in half, revealing a hidden page, then he cut it again and revealed another hidden page. "There's a whole hidden section within this book! What's more, check what's written there." He turned the book towards the CPU, and she read the text…

...Or she tried to read it, as everything was just a bunch of encoded mess. "Histoire said that the history hidden there was… um." He searched for a proper word. "Encrypted. Which means someone erased parts of Hyper Dimension's history."

"Uh huh." Magnavox took the book and began reading it. "How did you find it?"

"I didn't." He admitted. "Histoire checked on me when I was reading it, and she sensed foul play. It took her a few minutes to find this hidden section. What's interesting is that if you close the book, they become a single page again. No proof of their existence."

Magnavox blinked. She closed and opened the book and found that those pages had disappeared. "Interesting." But when she tried to peel it away, they were there. An unsuspecting person would miss this as there didn't seem to be anything wrong with the page, in fact Magnavox herself would have missed it if it wasn't for Samuel pointing it out.

"So, do you know what's in there?"

"Nope." Magnavox said, still inspecting the cipher.

"How can you not remember what happened with your own creation?"

She gave him a dull look. "Do I look like I would bother to remember everything that happens in all of those dimensions? I created Histoire and Croire to do that for me. And the Time Library."

He nodded. "...Good point. Can you at least find out what's in there? I think I'll need this info."

"Sure, I'll come to you when I'm done." She closed the book and hid it in her hammerspace. "Also, I brought some good news for you!" Samuel raised his brow while Magnavox interlocked her arms.

"Hm?"

"I collected some favors, pulled some strings, made a few deals with other Creators and…" She paused.

"And?" Samuel urged.

"And I got first dibs on Fay! Next time she's free, she'll come straight to me!" She stopped. "Oh, hey! That rhymed!"

Samuel froze as he must've misheard something. "W-Wait, what did you say?"

"Fay. Coming soon. First dibs." She repeated slowly for him, her joy of finding that rhyme now tarnished by him. "Wash your ears, old man."

Samuel ignored Magnavox's jab, he still had trouble believing what he heard. Then he smiled, like all of his worries were washed away. He just needs to hold out until then. "I see. Thanks for the news."

"No problem!" She grinned and affectionably ruffled his hair. "Just keep working hard!"

Samuel leaned away from her. "Yeah… Yeah I'll do that."

Interdimensional RED-Coded Contract

Once Upon a Time…

Yo, that was fun to write. And also I got to experiment a little with Saxton Hale's tale (I was actually thinking about doing the WHOLE THING narrated by Saxton Hale, but then I decided against it), be sure to let me know what do you think of it. And I must say, I forgot Linda even existed and EERS was even a thing. Thank you guys for reminding me though.

And also Merry Smissmass, I guess. I won't do a special episode though.

Responses:

kerrowe

Well, I'm going to show this in smol sized bites. Partially because I'm trying to push the plot forward and partially because I don't have enough ideas to turn it into entire chapter.

But yeah, it is his family tradition.

YORCHspartan117

Thank you for reminding me EERS is actually a thing I already established. When I first wrote the previous chapter I totally forgot about this… now that I think about it. Actually I forgot about a lot of things that happened within this fanfic…

And I'm glad you liked that, hopefully you will like this chapter too.

Smashgunner

Yes, and the siege continues. And it will probably continue for some time. Maybe, possibly… I dunno.

Guest (2 of them)

Yes, if Medic kills those people. There'll be a penalty, but not a permanent one. It wouldn't do well for Histoire if she just denied the mercs their money.

And that's because Trick will be in Lowee. There are lolis there, duh!

FourElemental

Where the hell I put an Oblivion reference here? I didn't even play Oblivion!

- Harmless Orange