The ego is a part of all of us, it is a natural thing that’s built itself inside of each and every one of us, all starting at birth. The ego is built upon all things and experiences, both good and bad. The ego isn’t necessarily evil nor is it necessarily good.

It is a neutral thing that can sway either way but must inevitably come back to the middle-ground. For if the ego’s pendulum were to swing too far one way for too long, then we would become mis-balanced and would misjudge many things ahead of our path.

What is the ego, anyway?

The ego is a natural kind of “personality” that is built through experience itself. The ego builds upon itself through everything that you feel, think and experience.

The ego is the automatic personality that you show to others everyday. It is what laughs at jokes you understand due to experiences, it is what fake smiles, it is your posture and how you are as a person. It is what most people consider themselves.

The ego is what reacts to the external world. It chooses those reactions from past experiences, beliefs and thoughts. How you think and act manifests the ego; for example, if you tend to think negatively, then your ego is also negative. No matter how you act on the outside, it’s just a show from the ego to get whatever the ego wants.

The ego isn’t a bad thing, however. If you want peace, health, happiness and/or wealth then your ego will manifest itself to be able to retrieve those things in the external world. This is what people mean by “the law of attraction”, it’s really just your ego responding correctly to get whatever external desires you may have.

But if you only want those things then it will act as a magnet, instead of being a magnet. If you want those things but are negative then you will attract more negative than not, but you will certainly attract positive opportunities. To control the ego is to control ones consciousness.

The ego is an actor to achieve external goals, so it has it’s uses. But it can’t be overused for if it is then you may become reliant on the ego. Always remember that the ego is a tool to potentially bring good things into your life. It is also a deadly tool, for it can also potentially bring disastrous things into your life.

Watch your thoughts, actions and desires for they will all manifest your reality thanks to the show you’ll be putting on.

It is natural, but shouldn’t be automatic

In “To Become Everything. What Ego Death Means and Why It’s Important” we mentioned ego death a lot and even a little bit about how to achieve it. Ego death keeps your ego in check, it gives you a brand new base to build on so you may build your external world. Slowly, for patience is king.

If you let your ego go as if it were an autoresponder, then it would simply overtake your emotions and you’d become very apathetic or worse. The ego is to not be left alone, just like you don’t leave your dog alone. You must take care of it and train it.

Leaving an ego on automatic means that it will absorb every experience, every feeling and every thought to be true and will react to life from all of these combined. How are your thoughts, every single day? How are your feelings, every single day? How about your actions? If they aren’t what you truly wish to be, then your ego is presenting exactly those things that you don’t want to the world.

The ego, however, is absolutely natural. It’s necessary to survive adolescence and to also learn from the ego itself. It’s a kind of a cruel teacher in the end. For you realize it’s all been like a game, eventually, once you reach that milestone. If we did not have the ego then we would not learn of the inner-self and experience its beauty. We would take our bliss for granted.

So what do I do?

That’s for you to decide. The question, really, is “So who do I want to be?” or “What kind of person do I wish I was?”. Take these questions to heart, and write down every truthful answer. Discard any doubting emotions, for that is the egos defensive system at work. The ego doesn’t take change easily, so you have to be diligent in your desires, thoughts and actions.

If you want to control your ego then figure out exactly what kind of person you wish that you were. Write it down and make affirmations. Every day you must watch your thoughts, your actions and your resolve. Every day you must remind yourself, and your ego, that you are absolute about changing your external self.

The ego responds to emotions, so when you are most emotional is the most crucial time. The ego always tries to respond, but if you, the owner, interrupts and responds for the ego then it will learn from you and do the same as you do, in the long run. So remember to dismiss any automatic responses until you know that you are the person that you want to be.

This process should go on for about a full month. It gets easier at the 2-week mark, and very easy at the 3-week mark but this point is pivotal. At 3-weeks you will feel like you have it nailed shut, but that is a psychological trap. You will see how easy it is to change oneself, and then (ironically) revert into your old self.

Why? Because here you may start to slack off and your resolve, thus your whole reason for doing what you’ve been doing, will fade away and the old ego will see “opportunity” to thrive once again. It’s not evil, it simply reacts according to your actions.

If you’ve slacked off then it comes into play to take your place and will do it sloppily, for tools aren’t supposed to replace their owners.

Conclusion

We believe the ego to be a great opportunity for everyone. In most books that I’ve read about changing oneself, they all describe the above but they never really describe that it’s about changing the ego so that the ego can react differently. If your ego reacts the way that you’d react, then it’s a lot easier to get by in life to where you want to be.

But you can’t just think to change your life. You must think, then do, and then your results will come. Just be very aware of yourself. If you think that your ego is speaking, then it is. Don’t let it. Speak for yourself, in the now, don’t let something of the past speak for you.

You control the present and the future. The past is the ego, either let it stay there or build it to your needs and take it easy for the long run. Mental evaluation and changing natural reflexes is a difficult task for anybody, but we believe that the task is well worth it.

How about you? Have you ever essentially re-programmed your brain to get to the place that you want to be? If you have, how did you do it? If you have not, then why not?