A reader writes:

We use an internal messaging service at work that allows people to make and recall emojis by writing anything into parentheses. For example, if I designed an emoji of my face, uploaded it and called it “Tina,” anyone in the company could type “Tina” and that emoji would come up. It’s generally great and fun and collaborative.

One issue is there’s a dancing frog which shares its likeness with Pepe the alt right frog. Pepe is, obviously, a totem that is synonymous with hate speech. Unfortunately my HR rep in the office has taken to using this dancing frog in her office correspondence. All the f’ing time. I am confident she doesn’t know what Pepe is or represents, as she is not particularly culturally up to date. She thinks it’s just a celebratory dancing frog. Our company, however, is a very internet savvy digital media agency so EVERYONE ELSE knows exactly what it is.

I really am uncomfortable when she uses the Pepe, as it seriously dampers conversations. I want to let her know but I don’t want her to think I’m being condescending or pretentious. I also don’t want her to think it is a political thing as I am outspokenly against the current administration and I’m not confident that she feels the same. It’s a hate symbol thing. I would go to HR with it, but she is HR.

I’m seriously baffled by what to do, though it may seem trivial.

Why on earth is no one else in your office speaking up and telling her?

This doesn’t have to be complicated.

It would actually be more awkward if she did know the story behind the symbol — although speaking up about it would still be the right thing to do (even more so, in fact).

But in this case, since she genuinely doesn’t know, you’ll be filling her in on something that a reasonable person would be grateful to know. And even if she’s not a reasonable person, it’s still a valid thing for you to point out.

You could just say this: “I’m pretty sure that you don’t realize that that dancing frog emoji is identical to a symbol that has become associated with racism, anti-semitism, and other hate speech. I know that’s not how you’re intending it, but given that it’s become so strongly associated with those things, I figured you wouldn’t want to keep sending it out in company correspondence!”

If she seems skeptical, you could add, “The Anti-Defamation League added it to its database of hate symbols last year.”

That should be enough to take care of it. But if for some reason it isn’t, the next time she sends something out with the frog on it, I’d hope you could get others on your staff to add their voices to yours too, so that the chorus of people telling her to knock it off is louder.