Teledildonics! Say it loud! Just when you were like, "Awww VR is so cool!" It got cooler. Yah just then. That's how this stuff works. This train don't stop for nobody. Your granny could be lying on the tracks screaming, "Help me! Oh God! Stop the train!" and you know what would happen? That's right. They'd be scoopin' her off the ground with a pancake spatula and you'd have a flat granny. You can't stop VR! So, what made it cooler? You know all those times when you went into those adult chat rooms and hooked up with some skeeze on the other end to help you get off? Don't play innocent! There's not one of you out there who hasn't jerked or flicked it during an online porn session. Innocent my ass! So, thinking back to that moment, prior to VR, you were getting off with a webcam and a sticky keyboard right? I mean it was like, "I watch you, and you watch me, while I touch me and you touch you." Right??? Maybe it was different for a few of you who are freaky. Maybe you had someone in the room helping you with the touching....again, I don't know. But at the time, you were probably thinking, "Damn. I wish that skeeze on the other end could reach right through the Net and grab my chub or flick my bean! " I mean, it's always better when someone else lends a hand right??? Well, BOOM Baby!!!! That's how VR got better. So, you're like, "What do you mean?" and I'm like, "shutup! 'Cause I'm about to tell you!" Now. Like right now...or as long as it takes you to make a selection and wait for the package to arrive at your front door... you can order devices to fit over your pecker or get shoved into your vaj or dingus that can be vibrated or gyrated by a remote operator across the Net. Whatttt????? That's righ baby!!! Xmas, Hanukah, Kwanza and all the other holidays have come early. Your Internet skeeze can now touch you while you touch them. That's Teledildonics. That's what's happening now. And that's what you gotta jump on 'cause this stuff is freaky!

There's someone out there, you know who you are, asking, "What would I do with a device like that? That seems weird." Well you're weird bitch! What are you going to do when your company sends you away from your partner who has that rocking bod to go on some lame business trip to frickin who knows where? Hmmm. Well your either going to set the game out on the bench, put in a substitute, or play a solo game. But why, I mean why eat a peanut butter sandwich when you got steak in the fridge??? Option number four baby!!! Get a VR headset for you and your partner, pop a few of these teledildonic devices on your cranks or in your orifices and bump your virtual fuzzies in cyber space. I mean damn people! This ride we're all on isn't everlasting. It's gonna end at some point and you gotta live a little!

