Hillary Clinton Announces She Will Seek Reelection As President Of The United States

WASHINGTON, D.C.—Hillary Clinton has announced that after much debate she will seek reelection as president of the United States.

Pundits on MSNBC, CNN, and ABC News have long pondered whether Clinton would seek reelection or allow someone else to step in, and now she's made a definitive declaration.

"After much deliberation, consultation, and prayer to Moloch, I have decided that I will seek a second term," she said to a crowd gathered at a local Wendy's restaurant. "I feel I haven't accomplished everything I wanted to in my first term, and I really need a full eight years to implement my final solution to all of America's problems."

"Orange man bad! Orange man bad!" she chanted at one heckler, though the heckler turned out to be a Wendy's worker asking if she wanted the Jr. Bacon Cheeseburger 4 for $4 or the chicken sandwich one.

Aides then gently ushered her back onto the bus to take her back to Bright Sunrise Home For Seniors.

A Babylon Bee subscriber contributed to this report. If you want to get involved with the staff writers at The Babylon Bee, check out our membership options here

Get Free Access To Our Brand New Site: Not the Bee After creating The Babylon Bee in six literal days, Adam Ford rested. But he rests no longer. Introducing Not the Bee — a brand new humor-based news site run by Adam himself. It's loaded with funny content and all the best features of a social network. And the best part? Everyone with a subscription to The Bee gets full access at no extra cost. Get FREE Access *with premium subscription to The Babylon Bee