The most beautiful word in the English language may be "Daddy" and the first time you hear your kids say it, your heart explodes. You know what else explodes? Your life—it’s blown to smithereens. Especially if you have the party-real-hard habits former Vice co-founder and current Street Boners blogger Gavin McInnes had. He’s given up about a hundred things to be a father. Here’s the top 10.

10. No Ogling

Women complain about being invisible after 35 but they are not exactly drinking down gallons of old guys with their eyes. If you ogle women at dad age, you get a "You’re kidding, right?" look from them and if you’re with your kids the look becomes, "Die!" I’m not sure what they’re so pissed about. It’s my eyeballs and penis that are harassing her. My brain is happily married.

Left: I don’t take photos for Street Boners, because women of this caliber recoil in horror if I approach them with a camera.

9. No Female Friends

"Bye honey, I’m going camping with Lesley for a few days." Yeah right. Every female friend you had in your single days was either someone you wanted to lay or someone you wanted to help you get laid. Monogamy kills both of those so you’re left talking to someone who hates sports, loves "Real Housewives," and has no interest in your lawn. See ya!

8. No Nudity

Being the patriarch means having to ercise discipline every waking moment and that includes the second you wake up. Saying, "Eat your cereal NOW!" as your pendulous penis swings back and forth is a punishment that goes way past the crime so get some pants on. The only person who gets to see your dick these days is the one who owns your balls.