A few weeks ago, I made a couple of jokes about women in a column about holiday traditions and, just like that, everyone called me a misogynist. That's fine, I wouldn't make the jokes if reactions like that bothered me. Also, if every joke I've ever written represented an actual belief of mine, I'd have to answer for a really long list of unfortunate personality flaws. And besides, as my girlfriend made sure to point out at the time, if anyone is in the kitchen making sandwiches in this household, it's me.

So, in the name of proving that (along with dispelling another recent accusation that I only use this column space to write about things I hate or criticize people for hating things I like), here are a few tricks I've picked up as a result of spending the past couple of years as the primary bread cooker in the house.

(Once you've learned how to cook, why not learn how NOT to drink alcohol? Check out Cracked's De-Textbook.)