Day One Hundred and Nine: The Truth Comes Out

A/N: Uuuuuuugh, updating on a Friday was a mistaaaaaaaake. Also, I'm glad some of you guys correctly predicted that Aurora was Elsa's ex that ruined her love life and broke her heart and kickstarted her major anxiety issues and caused her and Anna's relationship to break not just once but twice.

I'm proud of y'all. You deserve a cookie.

"Are you even sure it's the same girl?"

"Rapunzel, how many girls do you know with the name 'Aurora'?"

"...fair point."

"Look, I'm still planning on telling her. But I…"

"You're scared of how she'll take it."

I flip around so that my legs are hanging off my bed. With Elsa at therapy, I feel comfortable having this conversation in the privacy of my room, although I keep my door open so I can hear when she comes in. It also gives me the confidence to be this brutally honest: "I'm scared of hurting her again."

"...wow."

I put an arm over my eyes, "Yeah, I didn't think I could say that, either. After all the awful shit I've done, telling her that I had a thing with her ex-girlfriend...I don't want this to be the shit cherry on her shit sundae. But I still have to do it."

"Because it's the right thing to do."

"And also because my stomach won't calm the fuck down."

"Well, again just be careful about how you do this. You're my friend, Anna, and I hate seeing you hurt. Plus, you guys are...what, almost halfway there? It'd suck if you had to drop out of the contest this late."

"Yeah...yeah. I need that money." I reply.

But a realization hits me like another ton of bricks: I haven't thought about the money in weeks.

Ugh, one problem at a time, Anna.

"I'm gonna mull this over for a little bit. Can we get food tonight once I talk to Elsa?"

"Sure. I get off in a couple of hours anyway. Just gotta tell Eugene that he's on his own for dinner tonight."

"Perfect. See ya tonight."

"Bye."

Rapunzel hangs up, and the silence of the hotel room hits me. I've been alone here before, but it's been a while since something this heavy has weighed on my mind. How do I even begin to tell Elsa about Aurora? And how is she gonna take it? Maybe I shouldn't tell her…

No!

I have to, she deserves to know. Elsa's been nothing but transparent with me, and I've been keeping secret after secret from her. I have to do this...no matter how it affects our relationship. Our weird, confusing, interesting, fucked-up relationship.

I don't know when she's gonna get back, so I close my eyes and decide to take a nap for now. The less I'm conscious, the less I can stress over this.

Elsa…

Elsa…

"Anna?"

Wait, what?

I open my eyes faster than should be possible, and Elsa's just...there. A couple of feet above me. "Holy shit," I exclaim as I scatter to the other side of my bed. "Elsa, what the fuck?"

Elsa winces, "I'm sorry! Y-you were saying my name so I thought you were awake, and I...I'm sorry…"

"So why were you hovering over me like a puppy?" Interesting choice of words there, Anna.

"Puppy? I-" Elsa shakes her head, "I...don't know? I heard you calling my name, and I guess I wanted to see if you were okay. Maybe I should have just nudged you or something. I didn't mean to give you a heart attack."

I'm seething. I think.

Wait, no I'm not, I'm not even mad once I finally calm down. Besides, she shouldn't be apologizing for anything anymore. "No, Elsa it's okay." I grab my blanket and wrap it around myself, has it always been this fucking cold in here or is it just me? "There's no need to- wait, what's that?"

There's a plastic bag on my nightstand where my phone is charging. Elsa looks at it, and then back at me, "Oh that? It's...nothing, just a late birthday present. Very late, aha."

"A present for me?" I scoot forward, eyeing her curiously. I mean of course it is, who else would it be? For her? For Aurora?

Wow. Bad fucking joke, Anna.

She rubs the back of her neck, and up this close I can see that she's blushing. But then, of course, she's so pale I can always tell when she's blushing. She's...flustered? Embarrassed? Either way, it's something I haven't seen from her in a while.

"Yeah, you mentioned how much your job was stressing you out, so I thought I'd get you something that might help."

I mimic her movements, rubbing the back of my own neck, eyeing the bag like it's got her entire life savings in it, "Elsa, you didn't have to do that."

"I know I didn't have to," she says while moving her hand from the back of her neck to her elbow, "But I wanted to."

"Why?" Holy shit Anna, just accept the fucking gift and stop interrogating her. "Why are you being so nice to me after everything I've done to you?"

God I hate myself. Partially for the unnecessary questions, but mostly because, after I tell her about Aurora, she won't be nice to me ever again.

Elsa sighs and shrugs, "I really don't harbor any negative feelings toward you Anna, I never did."

Wow, does that make me feel the biggest piece of shit in the world, knowing that I used to. I sigh, "Elsa, I can't accept this gift."

"Well too bad, because I'm not taking it back." Stubbornness, another mood I haven't seen in a while. She grabs the plastic bag and places it on the bed in front of me. "At least see what I bought, I think you'll like it."

Not wanting to feel even shittier by protesting more, I do what she says. I take the plastic bag and grab what's inside it. The receipt is still in here, though I highly doubt that's the gift. It's gotta be this smooth, kinda squishy…

Otter.

I hold it up, "Uh...huh."

"Otters are still your favorite animal, right?"

"Of course," I reply, "But, what is this?" It's too fragile to be a stuffed animal, but not solid enough to be food.

"It's a stress toy," Elsa answers. "Like a stress ball, but shaped like an animal. You said work was stressing you out, so I thought this might help. My therapist convinced me to get one too, and it's helped a lot. Just squeeze it a few times and take some deep breaths anytime you feel overwhelmed, it won't solve everything but it'll help."

"You got an otter too?"

She chuckles, "No, I got one of my favorite animal."

"A penguin. Right?"

"Yeah, that's right," Elsa smiles. I'm surprised that I even remember that, and she looks like she's genuinely happy that I did. It felt like the memory just came to me at that moment. "It was harder to find than an otter, those were almost sold out."

So wait...not only did she remember that my job was stressing me out, but she actually went out of her way to try and help me. And she specifically looked for a stress toy of my favorite animal. And what have I done for her lately? Slept with her ex-girlfriend, and didn't tell her about it.

I'm absolute human garbage.

Elsa senses my hesitation and frowns, "You don't like it, do you?"

"What? No! I-I do, I really do. Trust me. It's perfect, and I'll probably use it a lot. I...I….," I sigh, "Elsa, there's something I need to tell you."

I don't want to tell her, I really don't want to. Or maybe it's more accurate to say that I wish I didn't have to. I wish this thing with Aurora never happened, I wish I didn't hurt Elsa so bad that she had to...or almost had to...I can't even say it. When she sits close to me on the bed, and smiles at me supportively, the words get choked up in my throat.

But this has to happen, I need to power through. I need to make this right. "Who...Aurora. What did she look like?"

There's a lot of apprehension in Elsa's eyes when she hears the name of that dreaded woman again, the one that- well, the first girl that broke her heart. I hope among hopes that she describes a completely different person.

"Um, she had blonde hair that was a little darker than mine." Shit. "Kind of a deep voice." Shit. "And she had a bunch of tattoos on her arms." Shit.

"Was one of them a rose around her right forearm?" I ask hopelessly.

"Yeah. H-how did you…"

Elsa doesn't need to finish that question. When she sees the guilt on my face, it becomes perfectly clear. And she goes from confused, to hurt and betrayed in seconds.

"Oh."