Every person down in Cerulean liked Helixmas a lot...

But Lord Bill, who lived just north of Cerulean, did not.

Lord Bill hated Helixmas! The whole Helixmas season!

Now, please don't ask why. No one quite knows the reason.

It could be his greed made him hate giving presents.

It could be, perhaps, that he once served the Dome Fossil.

But I think that the most likely reason of all,

May have been that his heart was two sizes too small.

Whatever the reason, His greed or the Dome.

He stood there on Helixmas Eve, hating the Ceruleans,

Staring down from his house with a sour, Scroogey frown,

At the warm lighted windows below in their town.

For he knew every Cerulean, both Human and 'Mon.

Was busy now, hanging a mistletoe wreath.

"And they're hanging their stockings!" he snarled with a sneer,

"Tomorrow is Helixmas! It's practically here!"

Then he growled, with his typing fingers nervously drumming,

"I MUST find some way to stop Helixmas from coming!"

For Tomorrow, he knew, all the Cerulean Humans and 'Mon.

Would wake bright and early. They'd rush for their toys!

And then! Oh, the noise! Oh, the Noise!

Noise! Noise! Noise!

That's one thing he hated! The NOISE!

NOISE! NOISE! NOISE!

Then the Ceruleans, young and old, would sit down to a feast.

And they'd feast! And they'd feast! And they'd FEAST!

FEAST! FEAST! FEAST!

They would feast on PokeBlocks, and rare roast Miltank.

Which was something Lord Bill couldn't stand in the least!

And THEN They'd do something He liked least of all!

Every resident of Cerulean, the tall and the small,

Would stand close together, with Helixmas bells ringing.

They'd stand hand-in-hand. And they all would start singing!

They'd sing! And they'd sing! And they'd SING!

SING! SING! SING!

And the more Lord Bill thought of this Cerulean Helixmas Sing,

The more Lord Bill thought, "I must stop this whole thing!"

"Why, for fourty-three years I've put up with it now!"

"I MUST stop this Helixmas from coming! But HOW?"

Then he got an idea! An awful idea!

LORD BILL GOT A WONDERFUL, AWFUL IDEA!

"I know just what to do!" Lord Bill laughed in his throat.

And he made a quick Kenya Claus hat and a coat.

And he chuckled, and clucked, "What a great evil trick!"

"With this coat and this hat, I look just like that Groudon!"

"All I need is a Xerneas..." Lord Bill looked around.

But, since Xerneas are scarce, there was none to be found.

Did that stop old Bill? No! Lord Bill simply said,

"If I can't find a Xerneas, I'll make one instead!"

So he called his Zigzagoon, Ziggy. Then he took some red thread,

And he tied a big horn on the top of his head.

THEN He loaded some bags And some old empty sacks,

On a ramshackle sleigh And he hitched up old Ziggy.

Then Lord Bill said, "Giddap!" And the sleigh started down,

Toward the homes where the Ceruleans lay asnooze in their town.

All their windows were dark. Quiet snow filled the air.

All the Ceruleans were all dreaming sweet dreams without care.

When he came to the first little house on the square.

"This is stop number one," the old Kenya Bill hissed,

And he climbed to the roof, empty bags in his fist.

Then he slid down the chimney. A rather tight pinch.

But, if Kenya could do it, then so could Lord Bill.

He got stuck only once, for a moment or two.

Then he stuck his head out of the fireplace flue.

Where the little Human stockings all hung in a row.

"These stockings," he grinned, "are the first things to go!"

Then he slithered and slunk, with a smile most unpleasant,

Around the whole room, and he took every present!

Pop guns! And bicycles! Roller skates! Drums!

Checkerboards! Tricycles! Popcorn! And plums!

And he stuffed them in bags. Then Lord Bill, very nimbly,

Stuffed all the bags, one by one, up the chimney!

Then he slunk to the icebox. He took the whole town's feast!

He took the PokeBlocks! He took the roast Miltank!

He cleaned out that icebox as quick as a flash.

Why, that Grinch even took their last bottle of Fresh Water!

Then he stuffed all the food up the chimney with glee.

"And NOW!" grinned Lord Bill, "I will stuff up the tree!"

And then Bill grabbed the tree, and he started to shove,

When he heard a small sound like the coo of a dove.

He turned around fast, and he saw a young woman!

It was Gym Leader Misty, who the Voices often beat.

Lord Bill had been caught by this Water Gym Leader.

Who'd got out of bed for a cup of cold water.

She stared at Lord Bill and said, "Kenya Claus, why,”

"Why are you taking our Helixmas tree? WHY?"

But, you know, that Lord Bill was so smart and so slick,

He thought up a lie, and he thought it up quick!

"Why, my sweet water flower," the fake Kenya Claus lied,

"There's a light on this tree that won't light on one side."

"So I'm taking it home to the Cave of Origin, my dear."

"I'll fix it up there. Then I'll bring it back here."

And his fib fooled the Trainer. Then he patted her head,

And he got her a drink and he sent her to bed.

And when Misty went to bed with her cup,

He went to the chimney and stuffed the tree up!

Then the last thing he took was the log for their fire!

Then he went up the chimney, himself, the old liar.

On their walls he left nothing but hooks and some wire.

And the one speck of food That he left in the house,

Was a crumb that was even too small for a Rattata.

Then He did the same thing To the other Creuleans' houses

Leaving crumbs Much too small For the other Ceruleans' Rattata!

It was quarter past dawn... All the Ceruleans, still a-bed,

All the Ceruleans, still asnooze When he packed up his sled,

Packed it up with their presents! The ribbons! The wrappings!

The tags! And the tinsel! The trimmings! The trappings!

Three thousand feet up! Up the side of Mt. Moon,

He rode with his load to the tiptop to dump it!

"PoohPooh to the Ceruleans!" he was deviously humming.

"They're finding out now that no Helixmas is coming!"

"They're just waking up! I know just what they'll do!"

"Their mouths will hang open a minute or two,

Then the Ceruleans down in Cerulean will all cry BooHoo!"

"That's a noise," grinned Lord Bill, "That I simply MUST hear!"

So he paused. And then Bill put his hand to his ear.

And he did hear a sound rising over the snow.

It started in low. Then it started to grow.

But the sound wasn't sad! Why, this sound sounded merry!

It couldn't be so! But it WAS merry! VERY!

He stared down at Cerulean! Lord Bill popped his eyes!

Then he shook! What he saw was a shocking surprise!

Every person down in Cerulean, the Humans and 'Mon,

Was singing! Without any presents at all!

He HADN'T stopped Helixmas from coming! IT CAME!

Somehow or other, it came just the same!

And Lord Bill, with his genius-feet ice-cold in the snow,

Stood puzzling and puzzling: "How could it be so?"

"It came with out ribbons! It came without tags!"

"It came without packages, boxes or bags!"

And he puzzled three hours, till his puzzler was sore.

Then Lord Bill thought of something he hadn't before!

"Maybe Helixmas," he thought, "doesn't come from a store."

"Maybe Helixmas...perhaps...means a little bit more!"

And what happened then? Well...in Cerulean they say,

That Bill's small heart Grew three sizes that day!

And the minute his heart didn't feel quite so tight,

He whizzed with his load through the bright morning light,

And he brought back the toys! And the food for the feast!