On the 10th of December 2017, an unexpected turn of events took place across Western Europe, with a host of countries suffering from a strange phenomenon otherwise known as “winter weather”. Countries such as the U.K. (soon to no longer be a European country) and the Netherlands, the new home to the European Medicine Agency have taken an absolute beating from a new type of precipitation called “snow”.

England, which is well known for its highly esteemed Premier League football, sent out countrywide warnings in an attempt to alert football fans across the nation to take great care over the weekend while traveling to watch their favorite teams compete. Fans traveling to Anfield football stadium were recommended to avoid wearing suede shoes to the game, which are a favorite among fans. Liverpool hosted neighbors Everton in what turned out to be a slippery event. Even some of the high-level athletes fell victim to a couple of slips. Liverpool football club contemplated canceling the derby day fixture to avoid such tragedies as “getting somewhat damp” and “cold Bovril” (a traditional, usually hot drink at football events). Liverpool decided the show must go on and went ahead with the football match. Supporters were thrilled that they were still going to get to enjoy watching their teams play, but had this to say about the day:

“It was half-time and I had forgotten my gloves, I went inside to get myself a cup of Bovril and by the time I got back to my seat, it was luke-warm. I expect a refund.” – a grumpy 42-year-old man from Liverpool

“Unbelievable, they had us sit outside and the seats didn’t even have electric heating” – student with ridiculous expectations for his discount ticket

“I saw someone slip and drop their chips, I’m not sure I can go to another game again, it was horrifying, one of them got stuck to the bottom of my shoe” – Shirley, 27, got dragged to the game by her boyfriend.

Meanwhile, in the Netherlands, the privatized public transport monopoly Nationale Spoorwegen urged the entire country to stay at home as their trains simply can’t take the battering from one-inch of snowfall during the day. Trains were canceled across the country and delays impacted travelers nationwide. Given the Netherlands has never seen snow before, there is absolutely no way the NS could have prepared for such an event. Not only were trains impacted but trams and buses had similar struggles and despite being a very flat country, drivers were worried they might slip into the canals. One NS spokesperson had this to say:

“When you only pay 18 euros for a 40-minute transit, what can you expect? We cannot produce miracles.” Stijn van der Pijn continued “Some people say we get snow every year, well I say I don’t think so that you know that, hé?”

This brought up concerns as one of the key talking points of Amsterdam’s bid to be the new host of the European Medicine Agency was connectivity, suggesting the new EMA office would be a mere 10 minute train ride away from Schipol Airport – but if the Netherlands falls victim yet again to winter weather, this connectivity will not exist and Europe will not be able to act quickly on emergencies such as the recent mutations found in young women, forcing them to hate Christmas.

Given the time of year and the current winter season, nobody saw the “winter weather” coming. The snow came, saw and conquered, leaving countries in a pure state of panic, questioning the impact it will have on businesses on Monday.

However, around other parts of the globe, people in Canada, Sweden and the Czech Republic are finding the stress in Western Europe absolutely hilarious as their countries are lathered in 2-3 feet of snow every year, remaining completely unhindered from the fluffy white dandruff-esque precipitation.

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