Breaking:

Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez has died after a 2-year battle with cancer — Special Report Team (@SpecialReport) March 5, 2013

My sincerest condolences to Sean Penn.

P.S. The Vice President claims Chavez’s cancer was induced by his enemies. (The Vice President of Venezuela, that is. But it does sound like something Biden would say, doesn’t it?) I don’t know about you guys, but I’m happy to take credit.