To the tune of “She’ll Be Coming ‘Round the Mountain”. An April Fools song.

Chorus:

If you cannot solve a problem, make it worse

If you cannot solve a problem, make it worse

‘Cause if it goes complete berserk,

then experts have to get to work

So if you cannot solve a problem, make it worse!

Verse 1:

If you try and try and fail and fail again,

There is another way to proceed, my friend

If you’re feeling out of options

And need help with a problem

Then the best thing to do is make it worse!

Verse 2:

With other things elites are preoccupied

Only serious problems will catch their eye

So troubles you must magnify

Until they notice what’s awry

And hope that they are qualified to fix what’s worse!

Chorus

Verse 3:

There are many avenues by which to do

That which may seem at first to be confused

Make those wheels a bit more squeaky,

And those gears a bit more creaky,

And those pipes a bit more leaky, now it’s worse!

Verse 4:

Breaking things can cost you a lot of clout

But if you’re not caught, someone will help you out

So let out your frustration

On your source of consternation

And enjoy the vacation once it’s worse!

Chorus

Verse 5:

A catastrophe is quite a thing to fear

But away from a greater one you’ll steer

So dig that hole a little deeper,

We’ll decline a little steeper,

And we’ll dodge the Grim Reaper when it’s worse!

Verse 6:

If everyone does like I say to do

Then soon all our troubles will be through

For the things that we have undone

We will be the heroes unsung

After everything is fixed from being worse!

Chorus

Pitch up 1/2 step

Chorus

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