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Sarah Palin Debuts Her Campaign Slogan at Beck Rally. Lots of white people cry and wave flags.

It’s Saturday morning and I’m tuned in to the Beck Transformation Rally so you don’t have to watch. I’m waiting for God to transform America like Beck promised. Apparently we have been in “dark times”. Who knew.

A miracle is supposed to happen. Right now, all I see is a bunch of white people desecrating the hallowed ground of the Lincoln memorial on the 47th anniversary of the historic March on Washington.

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Over at a local high school, Sharpton is leading civil rights and progressive organizations, which usually march here every year on this day. Beck got his permit pulled before Sharpton could get his. They’re going to march to the site of the Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. Memorial on the National Mall to commemorate this day.

Glenn Beck is pretending to be President, desperately trying to rouse the sea of white faces gazing up at him in what appears to be the dazed stupor of the true believer. I think he actually believes he is President. He’s drinking his own Kool-Aid. But Glenn can’t stir these folks to their feet.

To be fair, many of them are older. But the Beck Transformation Rally isn’t looking energized enough to transform one molecule let alone a country. The cheese is just oozing from this thing.

And then he introduces Sarah Palin.

Oh, this crowd loves her! They’re on their feet! This is what they came for, clearly. Here she comes! Wearing white and black like she did last night in Hershey, where she talked to Jews for Sarah and raised money to keep women from having access to birth control. Your typical Friday night for Sarah.

Sarah strides to the podium. She is looking good today. No wiglet. Good move, Sarah. She gives her hard, quick windshield wiper wave and launches into her speech with little fanfare.

I’m wondering what she’s going to say, since Glenn’s permit excludes political talk and I haven’t heard Sarah manage a speech without jabs at Obama, Pelosi and Reid yet, so I’m wondering how she’s going to pull this off.

Turns out, I underestimated her ability to communicate with body language. These people know whom she’s talking about and what she usually says, so she doesn’t even have to say his name. Sigh.

Sarah’s Speech:

Sarah gives props to the “great emancipator” who freed us from our greatest shame. I try not to gag. This woman was sued for racial discrimination. Her administration got rid of many Alaskan Natives and didn’t hire any African Americans and when asked about it, Palin said she didn’t have to hire anyone she didn’t want to. Which may be true. But it’s hard to listen to her talk about Lincoln and emancipation. Still, she’s friendly and calm.

And here we go, friends:

She mentions the “sacred charters of our liberty that all men are created equal”. Does she understand what she’s saying? Does she have any idea what equal is supposed to imply? She gets into the ordinary called for extraordinary duty. A nice nod to our troops. Or perhaps to militarism, if I am to be accurate.

Things start to go awry when she shrieks out: “A force for good! And that’s nothing to apologize for!” She’s sneering. We all know that she’s poking the black man in the White House. This was a bad moment for her. Can she rein herself back in? Oh, I see I’ve missed the point. The nasty is the point. We’re really goin’ somewhere now.

“Liberty and justice for all, Great to be here with you who are concerned” Ohhh, here we go – dog whistle. Voice shrieking now. “Don’t retreat!” Go vote Republican!

And in a perfect Orwellian nod to a permit that doesn’t cover politics, here is Palin unveiling her 2012 campaign slogan:

“It is so humbling to get to be here with you today, patriots. You who are motivated and engaged and concerned, knowing to never retreat. I must assume that you too knowing that no, we must not fundamentally transform America, as some would want, we must restore America, and restore her honor.”

I thought this wasn’t supposed to be political. Hmmm…who exactly has dishonored America? Any takers there? Well, it wouldn’t be a Sarah Palin speech if she weren’t going negative.

“I’ve been asked to speak today as the mother of a soldier.” Nod to the Mama Grizzle or Grizzly or whatever. “Say what ya’ wanna say about me, but I raised a combat vet and ya can’t take that away.” Nice offensive move. I think she’s made up her mind about the Bush Doctrine finally. She is for pre-emptive war. “No one gives birth thinking she’ll hand her child to her country. Today we honor those in that distant land. Names of Americans who never came home. We honor those who served something other than self.”

WHOA! What? We honor those who serve something other than themselves? Is that like…..um…..quitting on an oath you took to the people of Alaska to make money?

Talkin’ as a mom. She launches into a story of three patriots. Bored for a while. Then the shrillness kicks up to level 10. Danger alert. “America love for justice and mercy is what makes us good.” She says this as if we all know why it’s bad—almost sniffing contempt of the White House just down the street. Her voice is shrill and enraged. Her tone of voice and curl of the lip give it away.

We pan the audience: old white men. Some old white women. A few “younger” couples in their 40’s. Not a brown or black face to be seen. But they will appear later, as speakers. Lest you be thinking of calling these folks racists. It’s a sea of white.

Back to Sarah: She’s telling a story about another hero. Story is good. She’s doing alright. She’s not charismatic right now, but she’s holding her own. She practiced this speech. She’s reading it from the lectern, but she’s not stumbling. For a moment, I see what others must see in her. I see a nice woman, supporting the troops. Then she pokes her finger out – darn it, she almost had me, then the finger came out. You naughty school mistress, Sarah!

“But Tom’s heart was only filled with LOVE! Love for country!” More nationalism. “How wonderful it is to be an American!”

Here comes the USA chant. Good lord. This is as sweet as a toilet paper commercial. Tears. Flags. Where’s a Snuggie when you need one? “We will always come through. We will never give up!” God, yes, the plight of the white man is never-ending. But you can’t put us in the back of the bus! She’s the hostess today. Not having to talk about politics. Much better.

Ooops. Finger pointing again, “May this day be the change point! Look around you! You’re not alone! You are Americans! You have the courage as Washington, Lincoln, MLK – let’s restore America!” Yes, courage. God, no one knows courage like the white men and women sitting in this audience on their camper chairs and drinking their Biggie Gulps. There was a time when you couldn’t get a Biggie Gulp unless you were black.

If you’re wondering why you suddenly like part of her message, it’s because this was lifted from Obama’s change speech, with the word restore inserted instead of transform. And that also explains why she had a fleeting nod to hope instead of hate. Is it bad to point out that I love how she’s using theft to shift stereotypes?

Nothing says “restore” like plagiarism. Just like nothing says a moving civil rights rally like a sea of old white people. I need a Kleenex. Wait, do the Brawny boys own Kleenex? I can’t get away from these lovers of money – er, America.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, was her 2012 campaign slogan:

“RESTORE AMERICA.”

Yes. Restore it from the black man. On the anniversary of Martin Luther King’s march on DC. Oh, in case you are wondering, the way we restore America is to send our babies to war. Because of God. Or something.

Crap, I really need a Kleenex!

This is supposed to be a testament to the strength of the Tea Party. I’m not seeing the people. I see the dollars, but I don’t see The People. And much to the Republicans’ regret, dollars can’t actually pull levers.

Yet.