Ahhhh! The dreaded first date. The thought of the unknown on the first date is something many fear and get nervous about. Most people go into a first date putting their best foot forward. You want to give the best first impression you can right? For a man it can be like an NBA draft trying to be a woman’s 1st draft pick. Society has taught men to roll out the red carpet and wine and dine a woman to show his worth and ability. Many go about this by spending the most money they can possible to impress the woman. Though I do agree you should show a woman a great time I do believe there is no point for the every day brotha to spend more than 40 dollars on a first date.

Yeah, I said it…40 of them thangs! I am not one of the men who have the notion that men shouldn’t pay for the first date because I think a man generally should(especially if he asked her out) but I think there should be somewhat of a monetary limit set. The reason I say this is that the first date shouldn’t be imperative of how much you are spending or these things a man should do to impress a woman. A man should impress a woman with his conversation, his mind, and who he is as a man.

Take for instance a man takes a woman out on a date. The man does all the stereotypical things for the date. He buys her flowers, buys her candy, and takes her out to eat at a real nice restaurant. The date ends and after all of these stereotypical “chivalrous” acts he finds out that they really don’t have anything in common or he finds out the woman never really was diggin him and “just was doing something”. Now this man has spent XXX amount of money on an evening with a woman who wasn’t even viable. We are in a bad economy aren’t we? A brotha can’t just be poppin off cheddar biscuits all wily nily. Your mouthpiece should be able to woo the women with all of the great conversation you are giving her. Just as her conversation should be wooing you as well.

This is why I subscribe to the idea of spending no more than 40 dollars on a first date (there is a 10 dollar curve depending on your city). There is nothing wrong with taking a woman out to somewhere that is inexpensive and getting to know the woman. A man can do some fly things without having spend an arm and a leg. $40 dollars can go a long way if you are being creative I mean we are in a recession, depression, economic crisis, whatever we are calling it now. What man wants to spend a lot of money on a date with a woman they find out they aren’t interested in or the woman wasn’t interested in them?

Even a woman going on a 40 dollar date with a man is beneficial for her as well. Think about it like this ladies and I am gonna to keep it real as possible. Like it or not with some men the more money a dude is spending on you the more he is going to expect from you sexually. It is the truth because he may be wining and dining you on dates but he may be thinking something like this:

You are ordering a glass of Moet. He is thinking, “She gotta let me at least look at the Garfield for that.”

A dude can be sitting there smiling while you are ordering the lobster thinking, “Oh she gonna have to give me some nasty head for that.”

He is telling you go ahead babe order desert. He is thinking “I am gonna pull my Pedro out in the car. She gotta do something for that triple decked cheese cake.”

A man can be sitting there running a sexual running tab and you not even know it because you are just having a great time and Che Maurices’. Some women are probably thinking well that is a man’s fault for believing that all of those things are going to happen. I agree with the idea its ridiculous to think a woman should be indebted sexually for dates which agree but the truth of the matter is that there are a lot of men who do. The idea is to get to know the man and understand his character. Why not promote keeping the date low-key? Think about it is a night at Ruth Chris worth a dude blowing you up because he wants you to give him what he feels he is owed? Why not prom ote the date being in a relaxed setting and let the date focus on getting to know this man? I know it’s all good for a lady to get a free meal but do you really want a dude named “Thurstin” Howard III damn near stalking you because he felt he is owed back like the Nas song?

A first date’s premium should be placed on the two people learning more about each other not the price tag of the night. Let’s keep the expectations as low as possible and quit thinking that dates need to be like LL Cool J or Babyface video. The date should be about both people not impressing the person but vibin’ with the person. If the date is going well and ya’ll are really vibin’ and having a good time there is no problem with keeping the party going. Some people will say I am being cheap and that’s cool “I’ll Be Dat” then. But, fellas I bet the next time you take a chick out you barely know to the new expensive hot spot in your city and during the conversation you find out she can’t even tell you the capital of the state. Then Ladies, you are with a man who you know you not feeling but showing up at your job unannounced you will be thinking damn I should have done that 40 dollar date.

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