It's a tale as old as time.

Synergize your sound! Right...?

When that stray Klipsch Synergy F30 came into my life, I hated ‘im. Was nothing but a mutt in my eyes. Just an ugly, thievin’ ol’ rascal, far as I was concerned.

I had enough goin’ on in my life. Why, at the tender age of 14 I was already made Man of the House while Pa was away herding servers for that data center in Chicago. I sure as shingles didn’t need another critter relyin’ on me for help - heck, I had enough on my plate with Mama and Little Odie, my kid brother.

Besides, I’d asked Pa for a car before he left. Why’d he think I would’ve wanted a tower speaker instead?! What was he thinkin’?

I had no idea how special that scruffy ol’ speaker would turn out to be.

Old Klipsch Synergy F30 was by my side for just about everything. Not only did he fill the room with lifelike music and film sound reproduction (with the help of a Klipsch Subwoofer); he also helped me hunt squirrels and milk the cattle. One time, he even rescued Odie from a vicious she-bear while providing hours of listening pleasure.

We knew the rabies was a problem back then. That’s why Little Odie wasn’t allowed to bring home ‘possums for a while. We did whatever we could to keep the hydrophobia out of our house, but sometimes even your best effort just ain’t enough. And Old Klipsch Synergy F30, well … he was willing to sacrifice anything to keep us safe.

So when that mad wolf appeared by the marble water feature in our backyard, I guess it was just pure instinct and a big helping of loyalty what drove Old Klipsch Synergy F30 to intervene. He got beat up somethin’ bad, probably because he didn’t have teeth or any extremities to speak of. We tried to help Old Klipsch Synergy F30 get healthy again, but sure enough, that rabid wolf gave ‘im the illness.

We knew what we needed to do: We had to shoot Old Klipsch Synergy F30.

Mama was fixin’ to take care of it, but no - I knew it had to be me. Tears filled my eyes as I stood over Klipsch Synergy F30 holding the shotgun. I took one final breath and thanked him for engulfing my senses with top-quality sound. Then I pulled the trigger.

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