Transcript:

Alice: I'm so bored! I don't like the New Year. I had more fun last year. Petey: Too bad! You can't go back in time. Alice: Why can't I go back in time? Petey: Because, if you could, you'd keep going back in time just to smack yourself for doing something stupid. You'd think, "Why did I say that dumb thing in class?" "Why did I watch that TV show?" "Why did I make that silly face just when all those adults looked at me?" And you'd go back in time and smack yourself for being an idiot. You'd chase yourself through time forever, smacking yourself silly over every misstep, instead of learning to accept disappointment and regret in a more normal, positive way. Alice: Ha! I'll bet I can go back in time! Petey: Now we'll see if future Alice shows up and smacks you for saying something stupid. Alice: Hey! I'll get to see what the back of my head really looks like! Petey: Uh-oh! Now she'll smack you twice.