A Four-Year-Old Reviews AQ (with his face)

By Jessica Saia & Isla Bell Murray

The Bold Italic has become the leader in brutally honest restaurant reviews from those with the least refined palates in the world: four-year-olds. Whereas an adult, professional food critic may offer a balanced critique on the specific shortcomings of a dish, a kid will just take the chewed up bits out of their mouth and wipe their tongue off with their tiny hand, and I appreciate the gestural simplicity in that.

For this edition, we take four-year-old Jacob Wang (who, fascinatingly, did not get a haircut, his hair was just born like that) to AQ; the incredibly intricate and season-worshipping restaurant in SOMA.

The dishes at AQ are the kind that you pause to admire when they’re set in front of you, examining the strikingly different “interpretations” of one single vegetable, and the presentation that could only be accomplished with tweezers.

Jacob, however, destroyed each plate almost immediately, pausing only out of confusion, and turning each delicate work of food-art into finger paint. Surprising, as you’d think someone whose favorite food is “dino nuggets” would appreciate the art of making food look cool.