Malcolm Tucker tells Alan Partridge: ‘Brexit is a death cult’ Malcolm Tucker and Alan Partridge, two of Britain’s greatest comic creations, have traded insults over Brexit in this week’s edition […]

Malcolm Tucker and Alan Partridge, two of Britain’s greatest comic creations, have traded insults over Brexit in this week’s edition of The Big Issue.

Tucker, a staunch Remainer, and Partridge, a Brexiteer, exchange thoughts on the divisive issue via emails – all of which have been published in a four-page feature in the magazine, which is guest-edited by Armando Ianucci, the man behind both characters.

The Thick of It spin doctor unsurprisingly doesn’t mince his words, taking aim at a number of Conservative MPs and branding Brexit a “death cult”.

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Tucker: ‘Brexit like committing suicide by walking into a door over and over again’

Early in their exchange Tucker’s insults are terse.

“Brexit’s idiotic. It’ll be like committing suicide by walking into a door over and over again for years, leavers are imbeciles.”

Partridge, on the other hand, is initially wary of tackling such a sensitive topic. “As hot potatoes go Brexit is up there with the NHS, North Korea and the cycle lane epidemic.”

OUT NOW! @Aiannucci guest edit, featuring Alan Partridge, Malcolm Tucker, John Oliver, Susan Calman – and more. ➡️ https://t.co/DYHJrCSIA9 pic.twitter.com/pbY1kUeYJv — The Big Issue (@BigIssue) October 16, 2017

He then suggests that “teenagers” or “Guardian readers” should take inspiration from 1942 film Went the Day Well?

“The villagers mustered up all that plucky British spunk and machine gunned and beat the Nazis to death , I think the postmistress put a spade through a German’s head. That is the kind of attitude we need to get this country back on its feet.”

Partridge: EU are unwanted party guests

Immigration and the future of EU citizens based in the UK is discussed too, with Partridge comparing EU members to party guests.

“I also know how liberating it can feel when a loved one leaves after staying with you for a prolonged period. And that’s how I and millions of others feel about the EU.

“We’ve enjoyed having Brussels kip in the spare room sharing some Christmas cheer.

“But we want the spare room back now and have had enough of asking what Poland wants for dinner, or if Greece minds turning the TV down because the volume is absolutely ridiculous.”

To which Tucker retorts: “When all your EU guests depart there’s no one to pick fruit in the garden or change your bed pan or fix the shower. To recap you are are now starving and unwashed, surrounded by overflowing turdpans.”

Tucker: ‘Michael Gove is a talking sea-lion’

It doesn’t take long for Tucker to deliver some choice words for a clutch of Tory MPs, with Andrea Leadsom receiving a particularly stinging insult.

“Once a week I have to Google that she ran for PM, just to check I didn’t hallucinate it after snorting heroin.”

Before then suggesting a title for David Cameron’s autobiography: “My Story: Shitting The Bed.”

Next up are Brexit cheerleaders Michael Gove and Boris Johnson.

“Would you follow them into battle? Michael Gove, the talking sea-lion? That lying shit Boris Johnson, a 20-stone binbag of f***ng giblets in a Brian Jones wig. Shit off.”

Tucker then takes aim at the Brexit movement as a whole, describing it as “a f***ing death cult”.

The tirade of colourful insults from the Scotsman all get too much for veteran radio broadcaster Partridge.

“Just a quick one to say if you EVER speak to me like that again, I will have you physically harmed by two very big, very loyal men I know.”

The full (and very funny) interview can be read in this week’s Big Issue, which can be purchased for £2.50 from your local vendor