Thanksgiving, Turkey Day, the first true bloodletting of the Holiday Season. Time honored traditions of family, food, and fighting. Each year, promises to do things differently ring hollow. Just one plate, easy on the wine, don’t let Uncle Darryl bait you into another fight over Henry Kissinger.

But we know the truth. Thanksgiving, serving as a sterilized monument to the crimson soaked history of Western Civilization, must be celebrated as our forefathers did. And as sure as your aunt’s pecan pie is much too dry and healthy, it is your duty as an American to listen to your shitty 19 year old cousin talk about why an ethno-state for gamers is not only logical, but a moral necessity.



Oh rejoice fair potato mashers, for The Great Unifier has been sacrificed, a man who’s ideals and actions are so grotesque and revolting, that all corners of the political compass stand shoulder to shoulder, much like the Pilgrims and Indians didn’t. And with a unified voice they shout.



“Epstein Didn’t Kill Himself”



With the reverence we hold towards the gelatinous corpse of a turkey, fed beyond capacity. We must also pay tribute to the Hyoid halved cadaver of one Mister Jeffery Epstein.

The Epstein Case is truly a blessing because it manifests itself in many forms. The grand conspiracy, the salacious details, the star studded guestbook. There’s something in here for everyone, no party is safe, nothing can be ruled out. The only certainty is that we are being lied to.



With a deft grasp of the facts and a strong control of the narrative, one can manipulate the normally drab screaming matches about abortion into a productive discussion of class relations in America today. And you can do it while maintaining a conversational veneer of 2019’s biggest scandal.



This essay will present a number of potential conversation starters and how to politely steer the conversation out of partisan bickering and into class awareness.



Before we begin on what to talk about, lets cover the no go zone. This is solid advice in your personal, professional, or romantic life. And for the purpose of a goals-driven Thanksgiving obey this one rule.



DO NOT MENTION DONALD TRUMP



Speak not his name, reference not his deeds, repeat not his words. Trump is a vile, soaking wet, parody of the disease that is killing America. We know this, they know this. No one will be changing their minds on Professor Doctor Donny Deals over a third portion of green bean casserole.



Trump Derangement Syndrome is real, it has poisoned both conservatives and liberals. Trump’s election shredded the very fabric of reality, ripples felt around the Earth. Our timeline can be healthily divided between the two eras. No longer “where were you on 9/11?” it is now “do you remember the last time you didn’t hear about Trump?”



Trump is an alleged child rapist, he met Epstein, he even mentioned sharing similar taste in women with Epstein. Why should this stone be left unturned?



Simply because, when talking to reactionaries, you can not present conflicting information. Their lizard brains seize up, and before you know it the 11th Benghazi hearing is happening live at the dinner table, and you’ve been drafted as Hillary’s legal defender.

That’s not what you want. It’s not productive or enlightening. It’s exhausting.



Epstein is a lense to perfectly illustrate the political ideology of the left. The collaboration between Nation States and Vested Capital will always work towards their own betterment, at the expense of working class populations. This is the message we need to be spreading, presenting a cohesive historical narrative that your average CHUD can sew themselves into. And Epstein lets one immerse themselves in the fantasy of figuring things out, of being ahead of the story, getting the raw truth.



This is an issue that transcends Trump, as we too must transcend him.



Now thats not to say Trump isn’t totally involved in some capacity. However, my pet theory is that Trump was only on the outskirts of this because he’s a rich pervert. Headcanon dicates that Trump is too gaudy and lame to be involved in something like this, something that requires debonaire and discretion.



What is crucial to convey to your family members, and their shady new girlfriends who probably took some of mom’s xans, is a common ground of understanding. We are on the same page, we are on the same team.



And nobody puts people into teams like The Professor Doctor.



#1- LOCK HER UP, LOCK HER UP



Monsters At Play

If you want to establish a social bond with a conservative, then you have to think like a conservative. The world is simple, there are the good guys (people who think like them) and the bad guys (everyone else). Beyond this dichotomy are the ancient evils. Spirits, unbound by our mortal comprehension of time that present themselves as various tricksters throughout history. And in our time, there is currently no greater evil than Hillary Clinton.



Watch this broken clock, because they’re correct. Which sucks, I know. But yes, beyond a shadow of a doubt The Clinton Crime Family has had its sticky sweet Arkansas honey bear paws in an innumerable amount of misery and death since the 1980s.



The American Wingnut’s fascination with her however, is nothing short of pathological. As Trump has warped the national psyche, Clinton has become the Angra Mainyu to his Ahura Mazda. Years after her defeat, she still haunts their waking life. A brief overview of the (hilarious and mortifying) world of conservative boomer memes will illustrate the obsessive, all encompassing terror that Hillary Clinton bodes over their world.



But who are you to disagree? Sure your qualms with The Clinton’s might be more material. Focusing on the bloodshed in The Balkans, the gutting of the social safety net, the vilification of Black Americans. Whereas Aunt Shirly is more focused on Hillary’s secret meetings with George Soros where they plot out the forced gender reassignment camps that she read about in a three year old meme your grandma shared.



Obviously only one side of this dining table is chained to the facts, and if that person wasn’t you, then you wouldn’t be reading this article. But the cool thing about conservatives, they value a good story more than the truth. And lucky for us, we have both the truth and this schlocky action novel of a narrative.



So when Ted, who’s not related to the family but shows up every year empty handed and kills all the Busch Light, tries to goad you into defending Hillary or Bill. Don’t do it. Because you don’t actually like them do you? No, of course not they’re monsters.



“Absolutely, throw away the key.”



Your eyes lock with Ted’s, his mouth more agape than usual. A dozen Spongebobs tearing through file cabinets searching for a response that will never come. An excellent parry, the first blow landed. You’ve disarmed Ted.



This is your in, we’ve established a common enemy. From there, elaborate.



“And then she had the nerve to go on The Daily Show, and joke around with Trevor Noah about it. Glibly laughing, giving no thought or mention to the victims of this man.”



Hillary’s appearance on The Daily Show was no accident, Noah didn’t spring the Epstein line on her. All of these interviews are pre-screened. Her handlers would never allow some smug late night wash out to get the jump on her. She didn’t just know that question was coming, her answer was pre-written and rehearsed. It’s likely that her team even wrote Noah’s lines.



This is a perfect example to illustrate the collaboration between Capital (Comedy Central, owned by Viacom, who also controls a huge portion of news and entertainment media both domestically and abroad) and The State (Hillary being a member of both the deep, and shallow state) to control the narrative.

This is also known as manufacturing consent, which I’m told is a book, weird. Now would also be a good time to bring up Ellen’s defense of The Bush Administration and her historical ties to American Intelligence agencies, paint a “both sides” picture.



#2- Let Me Be Frank

London is Burning with Hot Twinks

Hopefully the Clinton Conversation went swimmingly, Ted now sees that you’re not one of the Demonrats, a slave to Obummer. So let’s go after pseudo-imaginary enemy number two, Hollywood.



A large part of conservative mentality, and the reason they still feel so oppressed despite controlling a majority of our government, is that this power has not translated into respect in the real world. Trump was supposed to change things, make them feel important and proud again.



This was clearly never in the cards, but again these are Republicans we’re dealing with.



So, as the liberal media has become a fusion dance of late night talk shows and Green Day’s American Idiot, the average CHUD still feels remarkably alienated from The American Pop-Culture Zeitgeist.



The link between Capital, Media, and The State has been established through Clinton. Let’s keep that rabbit hole open, and kick the nutty factor up a bit.



Kevin Fucking Spacey is a key player in this, and his antics are not to be missed. Anyone with a toe in the sludge pond of American media is familiar with the allegations against Spacey, his weird coming out, and the backlash that ended his career. The more net savvy amongst them might remember the bizarre, unsettling video that Spacey put out right after his Cancellation.



For the unaware, Spacey released a video, performing in character as Frank Underwood from House of Cards. At first glance, it looked like the death throes of a man whose career had been untimely ended. A gasp for attention that only someone with an inflated sense of importance that only a Hollywood big shot could conjur.



As more details of the Epstein case have come to light, it paints a much darker picture. Spacey starts the video with



“I know what you want. Oh sure, they may have tried to separate us, but what we have is too strong, it’s too powerful. After all, we shared everything, you and I. I told you my deepest, darkest secrets. I showed you exactly what people are capable of. I shocked you with my honesty, but mostly I challenged you and made you think. And you trusted me, even though you knew you shouldn’t. So we’re not done, no matter what anyone says.”

– Some Pedo

With what we know now, Spacey had been on The Lolita Express with Epstein and Clinton (and Chris Tucker, which I still find hilarious), he has ties to the Royal Family. These details frame his words in a much more sinister tone. Who is the intended audience? It’s probably not the Netflix and Chill crowd.



The next clue? Hidden in plain sight. A mug, a mug commemorating The Queen’s coronation. The text on the coffee cup reads



“Throughout all my life and with all my heart I shall strive to be worthy of your trust.”

-The Queen via A Pedo’s Coffee Container

This was very clearly a message to The Royal Family, who just a few years ago gave Spacey a VIP level tour of the royal palace. Kevin Spacey broke hundreds of years of protocol by sitting on The Queen’s throne. This tour was under the chaperone of one Prince Andrew.



The very same Prince Andrew that also knew Jeffery Epstein. The same Prince Andrew that gave a disastrous interview trying to distance himself from the Epstein scandal.



In the almost year that has passed since Let Me Be Frank was uploaded, Spacey’s accusers have either dropped their charges, or dropped dead. He is rumored to be in Serbia, drinking fine spirits and eating up Slavic Twinks.



Was the video promising his silence towards The Royals? Or was it a threat? What is clear is that this communication between two nefarious parties was taking place in plain sight.



Clinton displays the link between media and the state. Spacey represents the link between media and foreign parties. The Epstein case obeys no physical boundaries. This is a crucial bit of information to get across to your increasingly drunk family members.



Too often, Epstein discourse gets stuck on partisanship. People on the right want to make this about The Clintons, and just The Clintons. When the reality of this case and politics as a whole, is that the Republican/Democrat binary disappears after a certain level of wealth and power.



Kevin Spacey links The Clintons, Epstein, and The Royal Family together. His video displays a willingness to operate within the daylight of national media. The fact that he got away with his crimes displays the level of power those behind this wield.



These are the facts. And now the narrative. Why is this happening, who is allowing this? Dozens of the richest, most powerful, and most public figures in America are performing sex crimes all over the world. Every intelligence agency in the world must be aware of it. Why has no one stopped it?



#3 – The Lady Ghislaine



Don’t Know When I’ll Be Back Again

The reason no one has stopped this, is because those with the authority to are actively facilitating it. Much like the supposedly democratic protests in Asia and Latin America, Western Intelligence has their hands all over this. But first a little history.



Robert Maxwell was born in Czechoslovakia, fought in World War II, was a publishing magnate, and had earned the title of Israeli Super Spy for his work with The Mossad. In the 90’s, one of the groups he pissed off killed him, and threw his body over the side of his yacht. His death was ruled accidental. This ship at the time was known as The Lady Ghislaine.



Anyone with a passing familiarity to this case will recognize where this moniker was yanked from. Ghislaine Maxwell, Robert Maxwell’s daughter and all time bestie to Mister Jeffery Epstein.



Ghislaine has been called many things in relation to Epstein. Girlfriend, Assistant, Talent Scout, Confidant, Courrier, or Concierge. She has been linked to Epstein, The Clintons, Royal Family, Israel. Exactly the cast of characters you’d expect to be running a pedophile ring.



And that is to say, yes 100 percent, this is an intelligence operation. The more mystically minded will try and paint Epstein’s activities with an occult brush. They’re worshiping Moloch, they’re eating babies, drinking blood to stay young. And if any of your relatives are on this Q-Train, so be it. The worst thing about Q is that they’re 40% correct.



But how does Ghislaine tie into the Intelligence Community? Other than her family, the name of the boat her spook dad got got on, any sort of logically procedural thought, Ghislaine also left us with a little treat before she disappeared.



Its shitty but I didn’t do this one

A clearly photoshopped image of her eating at an In-N-Out, in LA. She is reading a book, the title can not be seen. Her lawyer, who released the photo, reveals the book as “The Book of Honor: The Secret Lives and Deaths of CIA Operatives.” In the background of the photo, a movie poster has been photoshopped in, the movie is Good Boys.



Just to reiterate, a woman that was missing for months after her globe trotting pedophile boss who lets the president rape girls on his island was murdered in jail, photoshopped an image and released it to the press.



At an In-N-Out

Reading about The Life and Death of CIA Operatives

With the words Good Boys in the background.



Through Spacey we see the capability for those involved to use media to deliver coded messages. Any takers on what the subtext to this picture is?



She’s Out, and if the CIA doesn’t want to Live and Die on this one they’ll be Good Boys. Call me crazy, loads of doctors, friends, family, and former/current lovers have. I’ll wear the tin-foil. And odds are when Jackson stops explaining how Obama is trying to breed out white people so the Jews can rule, he will too.



To really get the rusted combine harvester of the conservative brain churning, show them the photo of Ghislaine in the aisle seat of Chelsea Clinton’s wedding.



The obvious involvement at all levels of government, across political and geographical boundaries necessitates permission by global intelligence. Their job is to spy on the rich and powerful. They know whats happening.



And they allow it, because the security and childhood of a few hundred wayward girls is a small price to pay for cooperation. Someone in Saudi Arabia or Washington DC or Tel Aviv is acting up? “Oops, shouldn’t have fucked a child on camera, sorry pal.”



You don’t have to be a stable genius to figure that out.



By emphasizing the connection to non-political government arms illustrates to your audience (the cretins with Hawaiian Rolls stuffed into their mouths) how this issue is inherently non-partisan. I hate to sound like an enlightened centrist, but there’s nasty people on both sides.

#4- I Thought This Was About Thanksgiving



Can the giblet break from kneeling too fast?

Yes, also class consciousness, I remember. Something that the left forgets is that reactionary thought is predicated on narrative. Facts don’t penetrate their feelings. You need to present a clear story, The Bad Guy vs The Good Guy.



The Bad Guy? Billionaires. The Good Guy? You!



The humble proletariat, our labor, our blood, our sweat, and our cum are the foundation from which all wealth is funneled upward. What does this wealth produce? Private Rape Islands and the jets to get there.



Bill Gates? Knew Epstein. Jeff Bezos? Knew Epstein. Les Wexner (of Victoria’s Secret fame) didn’t just know Epstein but was a foundational part of his origin. Those three men alone control over 200 Billion Dollars worth of capital and influence. The hyper-elite run tight circles, they’re all acquaintances at bare minimum. Even if they weren’t active participants, they were happy to sit back and let a path of human misery be carved around the world.



Wealth depersonalizes, the lowly poor are no longer just slobs who “didn’t work hard enough” or some bootstrap platitude, they’re lesser beings. Fodder to be mowed down in the relentless pursuit of money and power. We are the sheep, and they hold the staff.



But they can’t kill all of us. They’re gonna kill Bernie Sanders if he wins, but they can’t kill all of us. Not yet at least.

We live at the end of an era, the promises of the 21st century lie unfulfilled. Our planet is dying, our lives not only lose their futures but our present is wasted in constant toil to the benefit of our masters.



And the masters? Only demand more. More money, more power, more young girls.



Almost everyone can agree on this. Hopefully by this point your aunts will have come around. Now bring out the hook.



If you accept these conditions, about the nature of power and capital. Why do conservatives work so hard to defend them? Why does one protect a handful of individuals that only cause misery and havok?



We allow the system that makes Epsteins, that makes Clintons, that makes Trumps. And until we dismantle that system. They will continue to plunder our planet and enslave its peoples.



As the last dollop of non-dairy whipped topping is ladled onto the pumpkin pie, your father snoring loudly on the couch, The Bills game silently plays out on the television. Gaze into the eyes of your beet-faced brother, remind him that The Clintons funded the trip to Africa, Epstein found the lonely Swedish teens. And then we collectively allowed them to get away with it.

We’re all guilty, but there’s still time to change things.

