College football boasts the greatest rivalries in American sports, and we'll hear no quarrel to the contrary. From the The Game game to the other The Game game to all the other games calling themselves The Game, annual hatred is central to the sport's mass appeal.

But that doesn't mean every series we could possibly call a rivalry merits its own Wikipedia page, displayed for everlasting posterity.

There are no real rules for exclusion or inclusion here. You just know a sad Wikipedia rivalry page when you see one. And clearly, bonus points are awarded for oddity of matchup.

Hey, we finally joined Facebook!

But, for example, I've tried not to include classic rivalries that have lopsided records, such as Clean, Old Fashioned-Hate, or a series like Navy-Notre Dame, which has of late been far more competitive than it ever should've been, or a one-sided trophy series like UNC-Duke that has suddenly changed course. Still, there are some important historical grudges here that have nevertheless imbued their Wikipedia pages with deep wells of sadness.

This also doesn't include the Arkansas-Missouri rivalry, though I'm a little sad we have rivalry pages for series that have included all of five games.

"After ten years of the renewed rivalry, Vandal head coach Robb Akey, previously WSU's defensive coordinator, said in 2008 that he preferred the game not be played every year, instead saying he would prefer it as a 'once-in-a-while thing.'"

The record at the time was 70-16-3 in favor of Wazzu, and then it got worse.

It's tied, 41-41-4, and I don't even know for whom to feel sadder.

Don't laugh too hard, Ole Miss fans.

The Minutemen have won twice since 1912. Sure, they've only played 24 times in total, but 1912 was more than a century ago, in my opinion.

Penn State has a lot of sad ones.

Sure, there's a border battle and all, but ...

I'm sorry, that's one win for Maryland against Penn State. Ever. In the history of the world. — Spencer Hall (@edsbs) August 16, 2014

Rhode Island has won 26 times in 97 tries, and that's the only information available on this webpage.

This is a very cool trophy that spends more time in Austin than ... uh, tacos:

You cannot tell the story of college football in the 1940s without talking about Notre Dame vs. Army.

You can tell the story of literally everything else without doing so, however.

Delaware State has never beaten Delaware.

The Buffaloes spent most of the '80s and '90s telling themselves that Tom Osborne's Husker juggernaut was their archrival. And it actually kind of worked for CU. There's a reason for this Wikipedia page to exist, without question.

But 49–18–2 with only fleeting bits of reciprocated hate still makes for a sad Wikipedia page.

Greek Mythology holds that The Palladium is a wooden statue that fell from the Heavens. [...] Legend dictates the winner of The Palladium gains an unknown and unexplainable advantage over the other making it more difficult to regain control during future battles. [...] It's just another factor to overcome in this rivalry game between Middle Tennessee and Troy.

Between the year before the Korean War, 1949, and the 1978 birth of Rachel McAdams, Tulane beat LSU once.

The game's trophy is a spittoon, a thing you spit in. Michigan State is frequently able to spit in it.

Why are we doing this, y'all? Why?

Hey, an actual rivalry we actually like! ... and one that is 84-17-7 in favor of the bigger guys. :(