Ghostbuster team finds ghostly neutrinos in Batavia

On a hunch that short- and long-baseline experiments might not be adequate for finding ghostly neutrinos, Fermilab management went retro earlier this year and hired the original Ghostbuster team to carry out its own independent, unimpeded search for the elusive particles.

The gamble paid off. At a pre-Halloween press conference earlier this week, members of Fermilab management and the Ghostbusters team announced finding neutrinos along the neutrino beamline in complex 80sGB, a special undisclosed Fermilab facility built just for the New York-based team.

"We got slimed, as we knew we would," said senior ghostbuster Peter Venkman. "But we found them, and we are not telling how. It was so &%#@& scary!"

In addition to bagging the neutrinos, Venkman's team also reviewed earlier Fermilab neutrino experiment protocols. Venkman said there were major flaws in the way the experiments were conducted and the data made public.

"The problem with one of the older experiments was that the team gave too much away," Venkman said. "They were too loose and mouthed off to other scientists. That is not the way do science, let alone go after neutrinos."

Despite his team's refusal to disclose details and data, Venkman said his team's experiment will be both reproducible and disprovable.

"That smarty pants Karl Popper would be a-ok with our research. It is Karl Popper, right?" he publicly surmised. "Or was it Carl Yaz who came up with the test?"

Fermilab confirms that the Ghostbuster experiment's results will be published in a January issue of Nature and its antiresults in Science that same month.

Venkman said being down "in the neutrino beam area with all that gooey stuff and then seeing the ghostly neutrinos was scary beyond words."

He added that he is very proud of his team's good work.

"It is all about good karma," Venkman said, and he encourages particle physicists, in particular, to "start thinking outside the box."