Like many of you, I'm pretty big on deconstructing and nitpicking both movies and video games. Movies based on video games are my particular pet peeve, as it seems like they never get the essence of the source material right. I mean, just think about the movies about Final Fantasy, and how they managed to mess up practically everything that makes the games tick. Really, the mere thought makes me so angry that I ought to take this conveniently placed giant mallet and ...

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"Back off, people, I've got this."

Ahem. However, we're not here to judge today. Quite the opposite, in fact; we're here to create, to imagine what the absolute best video game movies would be. Here's four games that I would love to see on the big screen and think would best honor the source material. You are more than welcome to suggest yours in the comment section, and maybe -- just maybe -- a big-shot Hollywood executive will stumble upon this article in a coke-fueled haze while looking for donkey porn, realize that our ideas will sustain him for a lifetime, and send us all big fat checks stained with what are hopefully tears of gratitude. Well, that, or I'll drop by later and whiskey-scout the comments for material for a sequel article, drunkenly scrawling notes so I'll remember to name-drop the people who came up with the best ideas. It could go either way, really.