How To Get Back Up On Your Feet and Kick Some SERIOUS Ass…

We all fall down every now and then… it’s what we do when we hit the ground that matters….

Do we stay down? … Or do we get back up and transmute our failures into something great?

At one point I had nearly a decade clean and sober (I wrote about it HERE).

Yet there I was, checking into a detox facility in San Clemente, California, where I’d be laid up next to street junkies puking their brains out, complaining that their suboxone dose is too small to ward off the evil spirits of the kick, and hating the sheer fact that they were still alive.

And guess what? I was the only one in this place trying to keep a positive attitude. I mean, it was time to get back on my feet again. I was soooo done living the life of hopeless opiate addict—surviving from fix to fix and constantly running from the agonizing pain of withdrawal, that dark cloud that looms over anyone hooked on the milk of the poppy.

But wait a minute, I’m getting ahead of myself here.

Sometimes in life we lose our way. I certainly have.



Maybe it’s just a small dip, where we aren’t living to our full potential, and are just kinda stuck in the rut of stagnation and don’t seem to be able to make any real progress no matter what we do.

And sometimes, life can kick our ass so bad, we’re not sure if we’ll ever make it back, much less forward.

Divorce, health issues, addiction, the loss of a loved one, a failed business, financial difficulties, loneliness, depression, stress, feeling locked into something so big we just don’t know how to get out of it, or any one of the other conflicts, crises or chokeholds life can put us in… whether by our own making, or life itself just seeming to have it in for us.

And if were lucky, it’s just one thing, but more often than not it can seem that we’re the brunt of some cruel joke, and we’re hit by the freight train of 3, 4, 5 or more of these problems at once.

Problems it seems, like to run in packs.

I’ve been beaten into submission more times than I can count… and I can count pretty high.

But like a lot of people, I wouldn’t trade those experiences for anything, no matter how dark, dreadful or desperate those times were. Easier to say that now though, not so easy when the river of shit runs waist deep… or when you’re drowning in it.

We all understand at least at some level that our problems are blessings in disguise. Grandma told us that one.

But when your ankle’s stuck in the bear trap, it just plain sucks, and it seems all we can do is thrash around and bleed… hoping you don’t lose your foot… or leg… or worse.

In this blog post, I’d like to share with you a list of things that can definitely help you get back up on your feet when you’re face down on the asphalt.

However, I wanna make it clear that I’m by no means trying to give you the impression that I think I’m some kinda expert on how to come back from all of life’s problems. I’m not. All I can do is speak from my personal experience, as well as what I’ve seen work for others.

Everyone has their own unique set of problems, some gnarlier than others, but fortunately there aren’t a lot of things out there that humans aren’t able overcome.

So, if you’re in a slump, a bad place, going through some shit that’s bringing you down, in the middle of a storm that’s getting the best of you, or just not happy with how your life’s currently going, I think you’ll find this list helpful. Treat it like a buffet.

Live as if you were living a second time, and as though you had acted wrongly the first time. Viktor E. Frankl

1. Look your situation in the eye and make peace with it

Once you’re aware that you don’t like where you are, and you wanna change, the first step is to simply accept you current circumstances and understand that change always starts with you, not what’s going on out there.

If you don’t get the inside right, you probably won’t be able to get the outside right, and even if you do the outside right, if you’re all messed up on the inside, it won’t matter, cuz you simply won’t be able to enjoy it.

Just look at all the celebrities who have all the money, sex, fame and power they could ever want, yet are so whacked-outta-their-minds-miserable they commit suicide or overdose on drugs.

I’m a perfect example, of someone who got everything he wanted on the outside, but was completely unhappy on the inside.

And because of that, I self-destructed the outside. Because the outside, is just a projection of what’s going on inside.

I’m one of those guys who set goals, visualized just like those dudes in “The Secret” talked about, and I worked my ass off. I actually got everything I wanted, everything I visualized, I got it. I was a good little manifester.

But when I got it all, to my disappointment, it didn’t fill that void within me, and I became more miserable than I’ve ever been in my entire life.

Now, I’m definitely all for going after things you want and getting them, and of course having the best of both worlds is ideal, but if it came down to one or the other, I’ll take the inside… always… cuz no matter how good or bad things are going on the outside world, you can always find peace and happiness within…. in fact, it’s the only place you can find it.

But you can’t have peace and happiness if you’re unable to accept your current circumstances for what they are.

Whatever is, IS… Look it in the eye and make peace with it.

If you mentally resist it, it’ll sink it’s teeth, sometimes with jaws so powerful every cell of your being will scream in agony. Until that is, you accept it. Then the situation no longer has power over you.

Accept it, take any necessary actions, and move on.

Sure, you may need to get a few stitches and maybe even some rabies shots, but it’s better than letting that beast gnaw on your appendages until you bleed out entirely.

There’s an ebb and flow to life, it’s not an “up up up” thing. It may be for awhile, we all have a good run every now and then, but sooner or later, we meet our match and take a beating in the alley out behind Club Good Times.

Like Dire Straits sang, sometimes you’re the windshield and sometimes you’re the bug.

When we are no longer able to change a situation – we are challenged to change ourselves. Viktor E. Frankl

Everyone has problems

Everyone’s life is filled with chaos, conflict and confusion. It’s just how it is. And if you can show me someone who’s never had any serious problems in their life, I’ll show you the most boring person in the world… someone who’s never dared to go after anything worthy… someone who’s never truly lived.

We all have problems, all of us.

“If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else’s, we’ d grab ours back.” Regina Brett

And because we’re the protagonist of our little drama here, our problems may seem like their some kinda big deal.

… But if we die tomorrow, our problems wouldn’t matter one bit… and I bet if you compared your problems with the problems the majority of the people in the world are having, you’d realize that most of your problems are a luxury.

Your problems do not define you, it’s how you deal with your problems that makes you who you are.

How much can you know about yourself if you’ve never been in a fight? Tyler Durdin

Remember that what you’re going through is just your current situation and it will pass, but it’s not your life, it’s just your situation



What you’re going through right now has nothing to do with who you really are, it’s just your current situation… that’s all… a fucking situation.

You, on the other hand, are the immeasurable thing that’s been looking out those eyes of yours since you were the size of a football… and have been conscious since even before then… you’re the awareness through which all the situations happen. But you’re not the situations themselves, you’re what’s aware of the situations.

All situations are opportunities to grow.

And for you to grow, without getting your ass kicked over and over by the same ol’ problems, accept your situation, whether you like the situation or not. Then do what needs to be done.

2. Start and stack

All you have is today and what you do right now, and if your gonna eat that elephant everyone’s always talking about, focus on the bite your taking right now… don’t worry about the ass while you’re chowing down on a trunk kabob.

Start with one simple action. One step. One thing that’ll get you moving in the direction of where you wanna go.

And then once you create a habit of it and gain some positive momentum, start slowly stacking one positive habit on top of another.

It’s hard to take on 10 new habits at once, but one new habit every month or so over the course of a year, is not only doable, but it will also lead some profound changes in your life.

Someone who wants to get in shape shouldn’t jump into the routine of a competitive bodybuilder. They’d break their ass in half.

They should start small, instilling new positive habits and stacking one on top of another, increasing workload and decreasing junk food and extra calories.

But they wouldn’t succeed if they started off with twice a day training sessions, followed by an hour of cardio, while living on broccoli, chicken, water and fish caps. A few genetically gifted OCD types might, but most would be doomed.

In my teens and 20’s I did a lot of, uh… drugs…

… Heavy ones, and big doses… I have one of those addictive personality thingys.

At 30, after the drug abuse had taken it’s toll, with my life in shambles, my mind screaming at me and living so disconnected with my soul I began to wonder if I even had one, I got clean.

And I stayed that way for the better part of a decade, building up a nice little life for myself: loved ones, good health and fitness, built two successful businesses helping people… a personal training business and an information marketing business… I became a generally positive person and had what, at the time, I considered an ideal life.

But at somewhere about 5 or 6 years clean, I traded my drug addiction for a making money addiction. A common trap for a lot of men.

And then, the unthinkable happened. I relapsed. And I’m not just talking about some pedestrian type relapse, I relapsed into the worst addiction of my life.

To make a long story short, I ended up losing pretty much everything… and I’m lucky I made it out with my life. It was the darkest, scariest and ugliest thing I’ve ever experienced.

After a year or so of living in utter despair , I knew I had to get clean and put my life back together.

I had to start over.

Here’s an example of how I started and stacked.

Now, before I tell you what I did, I wanna make it clear that I am categorically not religious, it just ain’t my thing.

Religion may be good for some guy standing over there, but it’s just not for me. Too elitist, too many rules, and not enough room for free thinking. But hey, that’s just me.

Saying that may seem a little paradoxical after you read this entire post, and I do have some very close friends who love it and it’s served them well. I respect and support their decision to go that route and can see how it’s helped them in a lot of ways.

For some people, it’s a great path… I’m not saying the model doesn’t work, it just doesn’t work for me.

Just like some people people prefer yoga, while other prefer jogging, or bodybuilding, or powerlifting, or CrossFit or Zumba. And some people like all that shit.

I even heard Louie Simmons is gonna start offering Zumba at Westside Barbell, to help his guys open up their hip complex so they can hit bigger lifts. Nothing like watching 320lb powerlifters with big bellies, shaved heads, goatees and sleeve tattoos rocking a Zumba class.

Maybe Slayer should release an album of nothing but Zumba songs.



With that said about religion, it not being my thing and all, the first step I took to get back on my feet was to pray with everything in me, basically asking whatever created me and is running the show here, something I have no conceptual understanding of, to PLEASE help me get clean.

Next, I checked myself into a detox.

The dude in the bed next to me smuggled heroin in and was still shooting it for the first day or two, puking everywhere not but five feet from me, nodding in and out and talking some form of street gibberish that he felt was so profound he wanted everyone to hear it at three in the morning, all between his hourly regurgitation sessions. This just added to the fun.

Once I went through with the withdrawals, got the drugs outta my system and attained physical sobriety, I got involved into 12 step program.

Then, over the course of the next year or so, I stacked the following in no particular order…

– Stepped up my my exercise program

– Started meditating

– Started eating 90% good clean food ( portions have always been a big problem for me, even to this day )

– I added in fresh raw veggie juice

– Started reading lots of good positive stuff again

– Committed to writing daily about the kinda stuff my soul burns to write about, instead of just marketing stuff

– Began doing visualization techniques again

– Began daily gratitude exercises

– Began practicing forgiveness exercises

– Stopped 99% of all my complaining … including the little complaints that most of us do but don’t even notice

Now, it’s important to note that I DIDN’T tackle all this stuff at once.

One at a time, I stacked positive habit on top of positive habit. That’s how big change happens.

Am I now some enlightened being with butterflies flying outta my ass?

No.

But the changes, the new habits, some small, some big, over time, have had a profound positive effect.

It’s easier to improve things 1% at a time than 100% all at once. And before long, those 1%’s, compounded with interest, add up to FAR more than 100%.

But it all starts with one step.

3. Become determined to turn your pain, loss and suffering into something great

Every negative event contains within it the seed of an equal or greater benefit. ~ Napoleon Hill

No matter how shitty life may get sometimes, you can find a positive in just about everything, if you look for it. And if you can’t see it with your eyes, then make it with your heart, your hands and your words.

It’s easy to get caught up in the “why?’

Why did I screw things up?

Why did I have to lose everything?

Why does so much bad shit happen to me all the time?

Why did he/she leave me?

“Why?” isn’t the right question.

The right question is “How?”.

How can I change this?

How can I turn this into a positive?

How can I use this for good?

How can I make sure this never happens again?

One of my best friends, Big Larry Clay, is always saying “All works for good”

It’s like the dude’s answer to everything. Your house just burned down? All works for good

Someone conned you outta all your money? All works for good.

You just lost an eyeball? All works for good.

Larry is 6’8″ 330 pounds, and holds black belts in 8 kinds of martial arts…

… He’s a high level Krav Maga expert and instructor, and does a lot of ministry work.

In the late 1990’s, Larry and I used to toss drunks out of a bar that we worked at as bouncers together in Lubbock Texas, and we’re still good friends today.

Larry had a youth that would have caused most people to either off themselves, become a lifelong victim, or a lifelong perpetrator of the same kinda bad shit he went through.

As a young boy, Larry experienced extreme sexual abuse, torture, starvation and homelessness. He also witnessed the suicide of a family member. And you know what? Larry wouldn’t trade those experiences for anything in the world. It made him who he is today.

By all rights Larry should be a serial killer.

But trolling the country looking for prostitutes to toss in his trunk isn’t the path Larry chose.

Instead, Larry took all that bad stuff that happened to him and turned it something good.

Not only does he help people get into shape with his gym, teach people how to defend themselves with what is probably the most efficient and gnarly kind of self-defense known to man, Krav Maga, but he also helps people with his All Works for Good Ministry

Larry was one of the guys who really proved himself as a friend and was there for me during my darkest hours.

That dude has seen me in tears more times then I’d like to admit. That must look funny by the way, a 6’6″ 300 plus pound guy balls his eyes out to a 6’8″ 300 plus pound guy. Hilarious.

Like Larry, I wouldn’t trade all the pain and loss I experienced for anything.

I wouldn’t trade it because of all I learned, how much it made me grow and how it molded me into the person I am today… allowing me to share my experience, as well as what works for me, with others.

I would not have my beautiful daughter Zoe, had not every second, and every inch, happened exactly as it did…

… Sure, I might have some other beautiful little girl, but it wouldn’t be Zoe.

I would not be writing the kind of stuff I am right now, had things not gone down the way they did. I wouldn’t be spreading the kind of ideas I’m spreading… This blog wouldn’t even exist.

I had to go through the most miserable, painful and depressing place of my life, to discover the most peaceful, balanced and happiest place of my life… full of problems on the choppy waters up above, sure, but pretty damn chill and content in the deep still waters down below.

I wouldn’t have the values I do today… values beyond just getting ripped, making money and getting laid.

I would not be the kinder, gentler man I am today, had I not learned, the way I had to learn, what simply does work for me.

In my experience, the most interesting people, the ones who do the most incredible things, help the most people, have the most impact, and are the happiest… are the way they are because of the hell they once endured.

It can kill us, or it can be our greatest gift. The choice is ours

“The only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn like fabulous yellow roman candles exploding like spiders across the stars.” ― Jack Kerouac

4. Lift up others and help them get what they want in life

When you’re helping others, it takes you outta your own selfish thoughts of “me, mine, why don’t I have enough and how can I get some more?” and puts you into a higher state of being

In fact, the most powerful thing to come from the river of shit you crawled though, is you’re ability to help others through sharing your experience.

Like Big Larry does with his coaching and ministry work.

Like I do on this blog where I’m able to share my experience and hopefully help a few people along the way.

Like the nurse-dude who ran my recent sleep study… this guy suffered sleep apnea for over two decades, not knowing why he felt so horrible all the time. Once he was diagnosed with sleep apnea and got it fixed, he felt completely amazing and was so grateful for this, that he got involved with helping others fix their sleep apnea, by becoming a nurse and specializing in assisting in sleep studies.

Like Brendan Burchard,who turned a near fatal car accident into a coaching business where he helps people from all walks of life perform at their absolute best.

Like Dewey Bozella, who after being falsely imprisoned for a murder he didn’t commit, fought hard for his freedom and got a second chance.

After serving 26 years behind bars, his conviction was overturned and he’s since not only been a source of inspiration for youth in the inner city, but at age 52, he made his debut as a professional boxer.

Like the sober alcoholic reaching his hand out to the man dying in the gutter from alcoholism.

The once homeless man now helping others to get back on their feet.

The countless authors who’ve turned their own personal tragedies and triumphs into books that helps others pull themselves outta the mud.

The once overweight person who is now a fitness trainer.

The once sick person who is now a healer.

The once failing business man who does pro-bono work mentoring young entrepreneurs.

The stand-up comedian who turns the chaos of his life into stories we can all smile and laugh at… while he laughs along with us.

The blues guitar player who turns the death of his young son into a song the entire world is touched by.

Your ability to help others, through your experience and courage… your ability to connect and inspire, in your own unique way, is your greatest gift to the world.

Don’t be selfish with the lessons you learn.

Somehow, someway… you can benefit others in ways far beyond what you can even imagine right now.

Your comeback is an inspiration to those who need it.

Share your gift with the world. Now that’s a hallmark moment

You will get all you want in life if you help enough other people get what they want. Zig Ziglar

5, Use the power of words for good

To illustrate just how powerful words can be, copywriting legend Gary Halbert used to have people in his workshops write two letters to their mother, and then put both in envelops addressed to her, but using their own same address, and mail them off ( to themselves ).

He would read the following words aloud while the students wrote them down in the the letters.

The first letter reads…

Dear Mom, I’m very busy right now and I don’t have time to call so that’s why I’m writing you this letter. You know mom not only are you responsible for my very existence, you are also the nourishment that has made my life sparkle.

I’m under a lot of stress right now and for some reason, I started thinking about you. It has occurred to me that maybe I haven’t let you know recently how much I appreciate you and how much I love you.

I especially like remembering you and then I have them fill in something special like, on my 18th birthday when you gave me that gold Rolex watch, or whatever it was. Anyway, I’m going to make it a point to see you just as soon as I can and then you sign love, and your name.

The second one reads…

Dear Mom, If I weren’t such a long way from home, I probably wouldn’t have the guts to tell you this but the following has been true ever since I was born. You have made my life a living hell.

Every person I know has a mother that is superior to you in every positive way imaginable. You are nothing more than a wrinkled up old bitch and as far as I’m concerned, the biggest waste of skin God ever created.

Speaking of God, as the good Lord knows, you’re certainly not too mentally swift either. So just in case your low IQ keeps you from understanding what I’m trying to say, let me make it perfectly clear.

Eat Shit and Die. Please don’t call or write me. I have no inclination whatsoever to communicate with you ever again.

Reluctantly, your son or daughter

P.S. dad sucks too.

These letters are both just paper and ink, nothing else, but do you think they would have a different affect if your mother were to read one vs. the other?

Um… yeah.

Dear Mom, I’m very busy right now and I don’t have time to call so that’s why I’m writing you this letter. You know mom not only are you responsible for my very existence, you are also the nourishment that has made my life sparkle. I’m under a lot of stress right now and for some reason, I started thinking about you. It has occurred to me that maybe I haven’t let you know recently how much I appreciate you and how much I love you. I especially like remembering you and then I have them fill in something special like, on my 18th birthday when you gave me that gold Rolex watch, or whatever it was. Anyway, I’m going to make it a point to see you just as soon as I can and then you sign love, and your name. I have them fold that up, put it in the envelope, put a stamp on the envelope and seal it. Then, we do it all over again with the second envelope and they write their name at the top of the envelope in the corner card and below that they write the date and they write the time which will be just a few minutes later. They address the envelope once again to their mom to their home and then they write another letter to their mom. This time it says: Dear Mom, If I weren’t such a long way from home, I probably wouldn’t have the guts to tell you this but the following has been true ever since I was born. You have made my life a living hell. Every person I know has a mother that is superior to you in every positive way imaginable. You are nothing more than a wrinkled up old bitch and as far as I’m concerned, the biggest waste of skin God ever created. Speaking of God, as the good Lord knows, you’re certainly not too mentally swift either. So just in case your low IQ keeps you from understanding what I’m trying to say, let me make it perfectly clear. And then we have a subhead. Eat Shit and Die. Please don’t call or write me. I have no inclination whatsoever to communicate with you ever again. Reluctantly your son or daughter, you sign your name and then it says P.S. dad sucks too. – See more at: http://michelfortin.com/gary-halbert-call-part-1-of-4/#sthash.6Pd1SzSd.dpuf

Dear Mom, I’m very busy right now and I don’t have time to call so that’s why I’m writing you this letter. You know mom not only are you responsible for my very existence, you are also the nourishment that has made my life sparkle. I’m under a lot of stress right now and for some reason, I started thinking about you. It has occurred to me that maybe I haven’t let you know recently how much I appreciate you and how much I love you. I especially like remembering you and then I have them fill in something special like, on my 18th birthday when you gave me that gold Rolex watch, or whatever it was. Anyway, I’m going to make it a point to see you just as soon as I can and then you sign love, and your name. I have them fold that up, put it in the envelope, put a stamp on the envelope and seal it. Then, we do it all over again with the second envelope and they write their name at the top of the envelope in the corner card and below that they write the date and they write the time which will be just a few minutes later. They address the envelope once again to their mom to their home and then they write another letter to their mom. This time it says: Dear Mom, If I weren’t such a long way from home, I probably wouldn’t have the guts to tell you this but the following has been true ever since I was born. You have made my life a living hell. Every person I know has a mother that is superior to you in every positive way imaginable. You are nothing more than a wrinkled up old bitch and as far as I’m concerned, the biggest waste of skin God ever created. Speaking of God, as the good Lord knows, you’re certainly not too mentally swift either. So just in case your low IQ keeps you from understanding what I’m trying to say, let me make it perfectly clear. And then we have a subhead. Eat Shit and Die. Please don’t call or write me. I have no inclination whatsoever to communicate with you ever again. Reluctantly your son or daughter, you sign your name and then it says P.S. dad sucks too. – See more at: http://michelfortin.com/gary-halbert-call-part-1-of-4/#sthash.6Pd1SzSd.dpuf

Words can make people fall in love, or put countries at war. Words can lift us up, and words can kill.

When making positive changes in your life, one of the most important things you can do is make sure you’re using words that serve your mission, instead of words that pull you, and others, down.

Put the power of positive affirmations to use.

Get excited and tell people about the new positive changes you’re making.

Use your words to inspire others, lift them up, and show em’ what’s possible.

Use your words to speak truth, love and life.

And don’t complain, about anything… instead, look for solutions.

Like Ted Nugent scans the forest for wild game with his bow and arrow, keep a close eye out for any and all complaining.

When you first do this, you might be surprised at just how often you actually do complain, even though right now there’s a good chance you’re completely unaware of it.

Most people complain an average of 15-30 times a day. And every one of those complaints is just adding fuel to the negative fire of the shit you don’t want going on in your life.

Instead of complaining, seek solution.

To help keep myself in check, I’ve used a leather band on my wrist, and every time I catch myself doing any kind of complaining, I’d take it off and put it on my other wrist. There’s something about the physical action of it that makes it easier and easier to catch the complaints. This reduced my complaints by at least 95%

Another way to do it is keep a coin in your pocket and whenever you catch yourself complaining, put it in the other pocket.

A great book about this, and where I learned it from, is A Complaint Free World. It changed my life.

6. Don’t be a one man wolfpack

Surround yourself with people who support and empower you, and whom you support and empower as well.

Put yourself around people who are doing the kinds of things you wanna do, and people who are doing them better than you are, and are willing to show you how.

Find people who’ve walked the path you wanna walk, and ask them to show you the way.

Find people who are the best at the areas of your life that you wanna improve, and learn from them. Today, with the internet and things like skype, you can access all kinds of people from every corner of the world, in ways that just ten or fifteen years ago wouldn’t have been possible.

Find a community of like-minded individuals where you can help lift each other up…

… Whether it’s as informal as a group of friends you hang out with, or a little more structured like a club, mastermind group, church group, 12 step meeting or a fucking drum circle… as long as it’s positive, empowering and you enjoy it.

If one doesn’t exist, start one. In person is great, but I know lots of people who are involved in extremely empowering private Facebook groups and Google groups, as well as conference call mastermind meetings.

If there are people in your life who don’t support you, either get them out of your life, or spend a lot less time with them.

The people you surround yourself can make all the difference in the world.

The old adage that we’re the average of our 5 closest friends, has proven to be true time and again, at least in my experience.

7. Accountability

Give yourself some sort of accountability.

My favorite example of this is the Alpo Diet…

… I first heard about from that big, crazy, giant of a man, personal development coach, Tony Robbins.

In case you don’t know, Alpo is a brand of dog food.

What you do is get together with a bunch of your closest friends, all at one time. Weigh yourself right there in front of em’. Then tell em’ to come back in 30 days when you’re gonna weigh yourself again.

You then pull out a can of Alpo in front of em’ all, and commit that if you don’t lose X amount of pounds in 30 days, you will eat the entire can of Alpo, right there in front of them.

You WILL lose the weight.

THAT, is accountability.

One time when I wanted to get back in shape, I did a blog post on my other blog for personal trainers and publicly stated that I was going to lean out. I got a ton of comments supporting me… How could I let all those people down?

I lost the weight. I’ve gone up and down since, but that initial public commitment kept me accountable and turned everything around.

8. Read, watch and listen to stuff that empowers you and serves your journey



“A reader lives a thousand lives before he dies. The man who never reads lives only one.” ― George R.R. Martin

The world is filled with books, blogs, videos and courses on just about anything you wanna improve, including yourself. There’s “how to” information on literally everything…

… Self-help books, spiritual texts, personal development blogs, business courses, autobiographies, you name it… it’s all been written by people who’ve walked before you.

What’s great is, you often have many options from many personalities and voices.

If one guy’s voice doesn’t resonate with you, someone else’s will.

And if reading’s not your thing, listen to audio books or podcasts or watch videos, like The Good Life Project from Jonathan Fields or The Happy Movie

For living a happier life, one of my all time favorite books is The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle

But if Eckhart’s too mellow and spiritual for you, give The Joe Rogan Experience a whirl… it’s a great podcast that’s funny, enlightening and he talks about a lot of important stuff. If you like this blog, then you’ll definitely like Joe’s podcast.

I also recommend checking out Shawn Achor’s book The Happiness Advantage

And don’t think you need to spend a ton of money just to educate yourself, you can get tons of great information from free blogs, YouTube videos and podcasts, and you can find used books for just a few bucks a piece.

Reading and learning has been a paramount part of my own journey, I do it daily, usually for at least an hour, but I prefer two to two and a half hours.

Sure I still like to watch my share of The Wire and True Detective… but I typically limit myself to one show per night… right before I bust open a good book.

If you watch TV at night, try cutting your TV time in half and spend the other half of the time reading.

Instead of listening to music all the time when you drive, listen to audiobooks and podcasts.

Instead of spending so much time on Facebook, spend more time on blogs that empower you, and help you live the kind of life you wanna live.

Get in the habit of constantly putting good stuff in, your life will thank you for it.

WARNING…

This next one, # 9, might not be your style… especially if the kind of comeback you wanna make involves making a bunch of money or impressing a bunch of people… it might even make it to where those things are no longer important to you… so fair-warning.

But if you want a life that’s better than the one you have now, and you’re willing to sacrifice a few layers of your ego to get it, you can’t beat #9. In fact, the more frustrated you are with your current situation, the more desperate you are to change, the more power this next one will have.

But it ain’t for lightweights…

9. Just give up

I don’t mean give up on your dreams, I mean drop the struggle… just like you’d drop a piece of shit if someone tried to hand it to you.

Kibosh the constant need to try to control everything.

It’s funny, but once we stop trying to control a bunch of outside circumstances that are beyond our control, and realize that maybe something bigger than us is running the show here, we’re able to operate from a much higher place.

And just be clear, I ain’t telling you what to believe in here

… cuz I have no idea what’s running the show, zero, zilch, nada.

I just know it ain’t me, and when I give up control and let whatever is in charge do it’s job, without me getting in the way all the time, my results are a million-billion-trillion-times-infiinity better, but only 100% of the time.

Some people do it with a simple prayer of surrender, like “please help” … or “guide and direct me” or the classic “Thy Will. Not My Will, Be Done”

Others do it the formal way through a church, if that’s your thing

Another way to is to do what Bill The Stock Guy and Bob The Butt Doctor did…



Bill Wilson, a failing stock speculator and Robert Smith, a proctoligist, are the dudes who started Alcoholics Anonymous back in 1935. And together with the first group of drunks they helped to get sober, they came up with what are known as the 12 steps

These steps can help anyone, regardless of whether you have any addictions or not.

I won’t go into all the steps here cuz there’s plenty of literature out there that does them a lot more justice than I can, but lets just say, these steps have brought back millions of people from their personal hells of everything from alcoholism, drug addiction, sex addiction, gambling issues, spending problems, overeating, co-dependency, you name it.

They help put back together the person on the inside, which is a key part of putting life back together on the outside.

It’s just hard to beat a psychic change / spiritual awakening when it comes to getting back up on your feet.

And don’t minimize the power of the steps just cuz maybe you have a bad impression of twelve step meetings… The meetings, and the steps, are two different things.

Anyway you wanna do it, handing your will and life over to nature, the Universe, the force, God, Jesus… whatever label works for you (most people are talking about the same thing anyway) carries an immensely healing power that can not only put you in a better place internally, but can guide your life to somewhere far better for you and everyone involved.

It can be as simple as a daily heartfelt prayer of surrender, or more structured like the 12 steps.

The road ahead…

Right now, this very moment, your life starts.

You get a do over, a second chance. Not because I say so, or because I’m arrogant enough to think the words on this page are All Powerful, but because this moment is all you have.

Nothing else exists… this, right now, is your life, and you can do whatever the hell you want with it.

You can do whatever it is you’ve been doing and keep getting the same kind of results you’ve been getting.

Or you can start fresh, and be like Robert Downey Jr… going from smoking crack in sleazy hotel rooms, to being fucking Iron Man.

Your comeback probably won’t be easy, it could even be the toughest thing you’ve ever done, especially at first. But it’s worth it. You’re worth it.

When you do what’s right, and you fight for your right to be happy, your right to be the best you that you can be, to live the kind of life you deserve to live, to make the comeback of your life… the entire universe will line up to help you.

The perfect person will pop up in your life at just the right moment, stressful thoughts will slip away and intuition will guide you… where you once saw nothing but obstacles, now you’ll see the signposts. Coincidence will be the order of the day.

You have it within you to do great things.

Things far beyond what you may see yourself as capable of doing right now. When self-doubt tries to get in your way, take it as a sign that you’re on the right path, and pummel it into submission through the power of action, cuz remember…

Self-doubt means just one thing: Go Forward.

When the only thing louder than your army of critics is your own self-doubt screaming so loud in your ear you’re getting spit on your face, you know you’re onto something big.



There will be bumps in the road, that’s ok, it means your taking action. These challenges are your opportunities to grow, to become stronger and wiser.

Be patient, change doesn’t happen all at once. You’re not gonna go from from homeless to a millionaire, from fat to ripped, or from strung out on heroin to enlightened like the Buddha overnight.

These things take time, most things worthwhile do.

I cannot motivate you, only you can do that. You either burn deep inside to make changes, or you don’t. If you have a big enough reason why, you’ll do it.

But I do hope to inspire you, and give you a few strategies that have worked for myself as well as countless others.

You don’t need to do all 9 of the things on this list, by all means, use this list as a buffet, but in my experience, these are some of the most common threads of those who completely turn there lives around… and I’m not just talking about making a few bucks, getting a six-pack or getting laid.

I’m talking about real change, to a life that isn’t worth trading away for any amount of sex, money, possessions, prestige or imagined power.

I’m talking about living the life so good things like that just ain’t that big a of a deal anymore… sure, sex and money are great… but they’re only a small part of the equation.

I’m talking about a life so fucking awesome that… well… I’ll let you fill in the rest.

If you’d like to read more about my own comeback, go HERE.

Find out how something that seemed horrible to me at the time turned out to be one of the best things that ever happened to me HERE.

And about how two of most interesting people I’ve ever met deal with adveristy.

Talk soon,

Big Chris

P.S. And if you liked this post, I’d be stone honored if you would push some of those social media sharing buttons up top and share it with your friends.

AND… I’d love to hear your comments below

P.P.S. Read about my journey to hell and back HERE.

Photo of wooden rungs on pole, is by David Oliva