Elijah: Good morning readers!

Elijah is in quite a cheery mood after the party last night.

Elijah: I can’t believe that hot chick kissed me!

Whatever. Get to class!

Elijah: Yes mam! I’m a workaholic, why wouldn’t I go?

I have no clue.

How was class?

Elijah: Boring. *groans*

Don’t worry, I have fun things planned for you.

Elijah: Ooooh, what is it?

You’ll never know!

I sent Elijah to the coffee shop for some lunch and a power nap. But oh! What’s this in the background?

A fire? In Elijah’s dorm no less?

Ugh, I can’t stand most of his roommates.

Elijah: *is completely unaware of the fire*

I’m just going to pretend I didn’t see that.

Elijah chatted it up with his first romantic interest (by choice anyway).

Elijah: Hey baby, glad you’re keeping with your stink trails.

She rejected all of his romantic interactions. *groans*

Elijah: I DON’T UNDERSTAND WOMEN!!

And she just peed herself.

He had to settle for selfies and the school cheer.

Elijah: SMILE!

It’s not like he didn’t try…

Elijah: Come on baby! Don’t you want some of this?

Sheila (?): Ugh, no thanks.

Elijah: Hey, can we just be friends?

Sheila: Sure, why not? *jumps in shower*

Wow, she took that well.

Elijah: I thought she would at least be disappointed…

Elijah: Hey Sheila, since we’re just friends, do you wanna have some fun?

Sheila: Uhm… no.

Elijah: Fine.

Yeah, nothing happened.

Elijah: I wish…

I don’t have as much time to write as I thought I did! See you later!

Elijah: Thanks for reading!