Esquire

When Rihanna arrived back on Instagram this weekend, I was actually astounded time didn't stop or a parade wasn't immediately held in her honor (#rude). Despite this super disrespectful lack of public fanfare, badgalriri has been uploading photos left and right, from birthday parties, to her sick Halloween costume, to a sneak peak at her upcoming December cover for Elle magazine, which the mag described as "boldly stripped down."

Related: Rihanna Is ‘Boldly Stripped Down’ For December ‘Elle’

Well, it seems she's also stripping down (way, way down) for the December cover of UK Esquire's 'Food & Drink' themed issue, and to say the spread is amazing would pretty much be the understatement of the century.

No, seriously. Look.

She uploaded a few other pictures from the spread, which was shot by famed fashion photog Ellen von Unwerth, and full disclosure—you might need a super strong fan or some ice water to get through the rest of it. Rihanna SLAYS.

BOOM!

BLADOW!

YOWZA!

Black and white pictures + a shower hose - clothing = Rihanna's best spread eva, IMHO. If she was looking for a way to truly ring in the return of her reign over Instagram, these pictures straight up nailed it. Bless you, Rih-Rih, BLESS YOU.