“Grau’s poetic prose and stunning evocation of time and place… from the killing fields of Vietnam to the haunted alleyways of Bangkok, form a fever dream of copious bloodshed and many shades of gray.” — Publishers Weekly, starred review









“With echoes of Peter Straub’s KOKO and Apocalypse Now, T.E. Grau’s blazing, immersive novel takes us on the hell-ride of the Vietnam War’s last days as its raging waters also carry us through the first of our last days. I AM THE RIVER is a hallucinatory tour de force.” — Paul Tremblay, author of A Head Full of Ghosts and The Cabin at the End of the World









“A sense of being hunted, and haunted, hits you right from the start of I Am The River. That mood only grows in intensity as the scope of this novel’s nightmare takes shape. It’s supernatural and geopolitical and an unforgettable time. Denis Johnson’s Tree of Smoke comes to mind, the work of Peter Straub and Tim O’Brien, too. In other words T.E. Grau is writing the good stuff. Get some.” — Victor LaValle, author The Ballad of Black Tom









“I Am The River is the kind of thing that might happen if Algernon Blackwood had been brought in to do a rewrite of Apocalypse Now. A man barely holding onto his sanity in Bangkok remains haunted, stalked by a huge hound and undone by his own addiction. His only way out is through revisiting his past in the Vietnam War and the secret PSY-OPS mission he was involved in–and which he’s been running from ever since. A haunting meditation on war, death, addiction, and responsibility, with mindblowing forays into the weird.” — Brian Evenson, author of A Collapse of Horses and The Warren









“An intelligent accumulation of inner and outer darkness.” — Adam Nevill, author of The Ritual









“A lush green nightmarish journey into the dark, reminiscent of the late, great Lucius Shepard.” — Ben Loory, author of Tales of Falling and Flying









“I Am The River is a horror novel, yes, and it never skimps on its mission to unsettle us. It is also a book that finds horror not only in blood and shadows, but in the very real abysses that separate us: race, culture, and the manipulations of people by governments and by war. It moves quickly and intelligently from its first page to its last, evoking its nightmares in gorgeous, evocative, disturbing prose. A must-read!” — Christopher Coake, author of You Came Back









“I Am The River moves with fluid grace, flowing between times, places, and perspectives as it carries us through its protagonist’s surreal experience of the Vietnam War and his part in a covert mission which refuses to loose its grip on him. Located at the hot, humid intersection of Tim O’Brien’s classic Going After Cacciato and Francis Ford Coppola’s Apocalypse Now, this novel plunges us into war at its most extreme and insane, when the methods employed for defeating the enemy leave reason behind for terror and myth. Ted Grau’s writing continues to move from strength to strength.” — John Langan, author of The Fisherman









”A disorienting and devastating evocation of the horrors of war and PTSD. T.E. Grau has written infused the War Novel with dark mythic imagery that sears like napalm.” — Craig Laurance Gidney, author of Sea, Swallow Me and Other Stories









“Hallucinatory, gripping and haunting, I Am The River should rank as one of the best novels of 2018. The masterful point of view shifts and often stream-of-consciousness pacing makes for a riveting, oneiric read. In the author’s hands, this bleak, nightmarish and deeply unsettling tale is not only palatable… but delectable. Of course, I expect such quality from Grau. Everything he has written heretofore is bizarre, literary gold. That stated, this book represents Grau’s best work to date, and it is a must read.” — Jon Padgett, author of The Secret of Ventriloquism









“I don’t often say this, but here it needs to be said: I Am The River is a modern literary masterpiece, and one that will be remembered long after we are returned to dust. It’s a mind-bending, soul-destroying meditation on morality and despair and conflict, on the trials of the human spirit during times of war when the line between good and evil is intangible. Impeccably written, compulsively readable, I Am The River deserves every ounce of praise it’s going to get, and then some, and marks Grau as an extraordinary talent.” — Kealan Patrick Burke, author of The Turtle Boy and Kin









“Grau is our boatman on this psychedelic journey of ghosts and guilt, artillery and atonement. More than a war story, I Am The River forces us to confront the bloody aftereffects in a way that is both powerful and poignant. A cautionary tale for the soul.” — Ian Rogers, author of Every House Is Haunted









“Grau’s debut novel I Am The River portrays a strange but historically accurate Vietnam War where the actual flesh and blood figures who orchestrated the invasion conspire behind the scenes, implementing true to life PYS-OPS programs like “Operation Wandering Soul”. The weird elements of the novel aren’t bound by real-life “spook” programs, but are expressed by supernatural threats, frenzied chaotic séances, revenants, and ghosts born of violence in a historical period and on a landscape where atrocities were committed regularly. Profoundly, even beautifully grim, Grau’s pessimism often becomes far more than the sum of its parts, his writing achieving a damn near numinous quality at times as the whole affair spirals into hallucinatory madness and despair.





It’s striking how the novel’s chapters alternate between first and third person, creating a discomfiting effect, a sustained confusion, which is elucidated on reading each distinct chapter. Entering this novel is an invitation into the chaos of the protagonist’s mind, a sustained and specific close-up if you will, while the story slowly but expertly reveals the bigger picture, like a camera pulling from a tightly framed shot to an expansive, even cosmic panorama until the full impact of this bleak and powerful story is presented. It’s an impressive feat.





This is a genuinely powerful read, one in which I suspect many a reader will be captivated. Remarkably confident, Grau’s lush yet tight-as-a-clenched-fist prose is sinewy and beautiful. As evocative of place as Gustav Hasford at his best, but laced with horrors, weird and disturbing as diseased dreams. All too human, emotionally resonant, this one is a nightmarish spectacle of human depravity as shocking as a Bill Shields poem. Heartbreaking and unforgettable, Grau’s debut novel is a must-read.” — Christopher Slatsky, author of Alectryomancer and Other Weird Tales









“T. E. Grau’s dark tale of suffering and the quest for redemption pushes the limits of psychological horror. Deeply poetic and disturbing, it reveals that even in the darkest corners of the soul, a faint humanity can be seen glittering and it’s simply beautiful.” — Seb Doubinsky, author of The Song of Synth and White City









“Very rarely, readers are presented with a work that will not only stand the test of time, but also ingrain itself deeply into our thoughts while forcing us to question the very beliefs and notions we have come to accept as the truth. I Am The River is a breathtaking epic that latches itself to your subconscious, drives its literary fingers into your eye sockets, and plunges your brain into the bottomless depths of insanity. From the opening chapter, the novel teleports the reader into a hallucinogenic nightmare anchored by guilt and paranoia. It would be easy for Grau’s underlining themes of retribution and the political aspects of invasion and slaughter to appear patronizing, but the author stunningly executes his craft as he always has, ensuring the ride through a war-wrought, existential journey is believable and traumatizing. I Am The River isn’t about the Vietnam War, but rather the effects that violence and loss of oneself can have. This wonderfully contrasts with themes of mysticism, spiritual exodus, and the true, terrifying nature of man…





We have no doubt that I Am The River will join the likes of The Fisherman by John Langan, in regards to its position amongst modern heavyweights… This novel is going to make waves in the horror community and it’s going to cement T.E. Grau as one of the best authors working today.” — Gehenna & Hinnom









"I Am The River is an astoundingly well-crafted, compelling, and delightfully unsettling affair. Grau’s talent for setting is as palpable as ever; the jungle of Vietnam is everywhere, like an insidious fantasy that you dare not articulate, even on the reeking city streets of Bangkok. His penchant for deeply tormented characters unfurls in full color, as does his flair for the nightmare. If you are one of the many readers who enjoyed The Nameless Dark, you won’t leave disappointed. For newcomers to Grau in search of literary weirdness in a mode similar to Michael Wehunt and Brian Evenson, this is an excellent place begin…





With I Am The River, Grau blossoms into a fully accomplished voice in literary horror (or, perhaps, the literary weird). My resolve to keep track of his writing career is stronger now than ever. For readers who prefer their horror fiction to ring with a little depth (but not too much), or for readers who simply enjoy a story that sucks you in and doesn’t let you free, I Am The River is for you. This is certainly, from what I’ve read so far, the finest release of 2018.” — Silent Motorist Media









“Back in 2015, T.E. Grau gifted us with a story collection so good, I still tremble with excitement just thinking about it (The Nameless Dark). He has a new book coming out next month set during ‘the last desperate days of the Vietnam War’ about an American soldier ‘assigned to a secretive CIA PSYOP far beyond enemy lines.’ Hell yeah.” — LitReactor The 15 Most Anticipated Horror Books of 2018 at







