WATERLOO — Nearly a dozen squad cars full of heavily armed, militarized police officers surrounded an apartment building in Waterloo this Saturday.

The police held their ground for two and half hours, ready to open fire and receive career boosts for heroic action.

It began when a tenant in the apartment complex slammed a door.

Predictably, the door made a loud noise because of the slamming.

“Apparently there was a heavy door that, when it was slammed, sounded just like a shotgun,” said Staff Sgt. McBride.

“The officers who arrived heard it.”

The police were originally called because a neighbor called 911 after hearing the door slam.

About a dozen more police cars rushed to the area to surround the complex.

After that, even more tactical officers arrived to enter the building.

They finally entered the building around 4 PM, guns drawn.

Fortunately, nobody was arrested and no dogs were shot.

“We don’t know who slammed the door, but we don’t think there was malicious intent,” said McBride.

Adan Salazar remarks that “the overzealous response is a product of terror training which conditions police to regard their fellow man with perpetual distrust, and keeps them in constant fear of a largely non-existent terrorist threat.”