



We can generally handle long, continuous stretches of fast miles - like occasional 30-hour blitzkrieg attempts at the Tour of Idaho - with minimal discomfort. But after 24 or more hours of hot-fueling, endless miles of bumps and rocks charged by a potent combination of intravenous Rockstar, 5-Hour Energy shots and the occasional Diet Mountain Dew, our kidneys are hammered and our bladders have developed a hair trigger. Somewhere around this time the constant urge to go #1 becomes a serious impediment to maintaining the required average speeds. What are you going to do? Here at the MoJazz Institute of Advanced Sports Medicine we've put a lot of thought into this profoundly distressing and potentially embarrassing problem. You can't come hauling-ass out of the wilderness to a 24-hour gas pump, even in the rural west, and be caught with one hand on the pump and the other taking care of business right in the parking lot. That just won't do (security cameras are everywhere these days). It's occurred to us in more than one desperate spot how useful it'd be to just quietly and unobtrusively cut loose (without even stopping the bike). But, as it turns out, even we have our standards. Now, courtesy of NASA (who also brought us TANG) comes a solution. Not an expensive hi-tech system that recycles pee-pee into