From Weezerpedia

This is a transcription of the 1st draft of the aborted concept album Songs from the Black Hole, as it is presented in the book The Pinkerton Diaries.

Synopsis

ACT I

Scene I One night, after his rock show in L.A., he gets stumbling drunk w buddies, argue about how to seduce a chick and eventually all score Jonas w a sexy mama named Maria. Maria [she does crystal meth + he leaves tired] sings about her love for him and her secret.

Scene II The next day he feels awful and confesses his love to Laura. She asks them why do you run w the others? They argue, him trying to convince her. Will you marry me? She does love him too. Maria comes in, Jonas treats her terribly, tries to kick her out She eventually screams that she's pregnant with his child. Now Jonas knows that he loves Laura, but she won't have him. No!

ACT II

Scene I Jonas pines what have I done? His friends come in and can't relate, tell him good news about ??? and sings Getchoo. He begs and pleads and does everything he can to get her back, but she stands strong. He resolves to take her with him spiritually. He leaves and she wonders if her morality is good, because she loves him so and it keeps her from him.

Scene II Jonas sings "No Other One" and goes to Maria with flowers, planning to be a good husband and father. Sings devotion + waltzes with her but then sees Don + Juan in his underwear at her door. Don explains that nothing is sacred, it's every man for himself. Maria freaks out knowing that she's lost him. Jonas is wild with rage, giving into nihilism he says he's leaving and will never see any of them again. At the peak of his anger, Laura's voice is heard, reminding him to be ??? of his baby, and to be a man with her original tune. He joins her singing I will remember. I will resolve to make the best of my circumstance. He ends up with nothing, but in the void his set of morals come into existence. He finds his path and it is alone. Last song called the black hole.

It is the year 2125. Los Angeles has a thriving underground music scene. The Spacedogs are finishing up their set at the Black Hole. Outside, the patrons travel-pods can be seen parked.

Draft

ACT I

SCENE I In the Black Hole Jonas: I'm so sorry Wuan and Dondó I sang really bad tonight you know I'm off to the corner of the room I don't wanna face another living soul Tell me when you wanna go, Wuan and Dondó

Dondó: No way! That was a good one man. Wuan: Yeah, we really rocked 'em hard tonight Dondó: For that I deserve another shot of the stuff I was doing 'fore I went on stage Wuan: Or at least a pretty girl. So whaddaya say, Jonas? Dondó: There's Maria and her little sister Betcha won't have to work to hard to take her home Jonas: I don't know if I wanna lead on a woman, you know, I've done that before She's actually a good girl underneath it all.

D Hah! A good girl! Does a good girl jerk you in the back of a taxi pod? Or lift her skirt for you in the aerolifter? Js I suppose not But, she really likes me. D You should take her in the bathroom now Tell her to remove her clothes And when you're finished Make her scrub Cuz that's what a bitch is for J No! No! You've got it all wrong, my friend No girl would go for that Pour a glass of wine Make her think that you car Then slip it to her ████████ Both Whichver way you choose Hurry there's no time to lose The bar closes at two and Maria you must do Cuz that's what a bitch is for

Maria

(walking up) Who you callin' bitch? Jonas Oh Maria, they don't mean it Don't listen to them Maria They make me so mad And you do nothing nothing to stop them Jonas Please, Maria, they mean nothing Now you must chill out Maria Especially That Dondó He acts like he knows that ████████ I despise him. I despise him. I despise him. Oh Jonas, I miss you Nobody else loves me like you do Oh I'm alone Oh Jonas I love you nobody else, nobody else loves me, loves me like you Js Please remember I'm only a friend Maria A friend who fucks me? Js You're too crazy to settle down with Maria Then why lead me on Js I don't love you but I can't help myself Maria I'll make you love me Js Please, Maria, It won't ever be Maria I'll make you love me Js It won't ever be Maria Love ~ me come to my car pod there's no one there, we'll be alone we can talk and if you want to we'll get stoned and relax have some fun in my pod Js + Maria in (my) your pod no one knows the things we do we'll get high and if you want to we'll sniff glue and relax have some fun in your pod Mra Now that we're left alone touch me and kiss me and love me!

INSTRUMENTAL (starts w Maria's theme in minor?) from p ->f ends w some theme from "Tired"

Js Ohhhh!!!! No, This is not for me I feel so empty I'm filled with remorse I've got to leave you Mra No, don't go You'll feel ok in the morning Js Maria I'm red with shame There's no one to blame but myself feedback I know what is right But I do what is wrong <feedback into TIRED O SEX> this theme is Jonas shame and emerging morality Mra Oh Jonas, I miss you JONAS I'm tired, so tired Nobody else loves me like you do I'm tired of having sex Oh Jonas, If you knew I'm spread so thin what I know I don't know who I am you wouldn't be so quick Monday night, I'm makin' Jen to discard Maria Tuesday night I'm makin' Gwen Wednesday night I'm making Catherine oh why can't I be makin' love come true I'm beat, beet red Ashamed of what I said I'm sorry, here I go I know I'm a sinner but I can't say no Thursday night I'm makin' Denise Friday night I'm makin' Sharise Saturday night I'm makin' Louise Oh why can't I be makin love come true Tonight, I'm down on my knees, tonight I'm beggin' you please Tonight, tonight, please oh why can't I be makin' love come true SCENE I Outside Laural's House Jonas: Oh, I am living all wrong (just acoustic serenade?) deceiving this girl leading her on I, tell her one thing Yet do something else I can't help myself She set's me on fire parallel minor But I know someone else the fire is bad Someone purer by far it blinds my senses I know what is sensible But she lures me in parallel major I know what is right I know someone else purer by far She lives all alone doesn't go out she sits home and reads or does her homework parallel minor Oh she's totally broke but she'll make a good mom She'll make a good wife relative major Will you marry me, Laural? Laural: No, I won't marry you! You silly boy playing with me I've seen you running around with all the girls leading them on like a rock star! Oh, you're living all wrong deceiving yourself You don't belong upon your stage Jonas: No, I'm smarter than that I've changed my ways Stopped chasing that dream I'm ready to be a man and change overnight Give you my hand So you can lead me Laurel: Jonas, I do like you still

A section

but different

melody → probably too much for my own good But I'm no fool I'm no slave to my emotions I have control Jonas" Laural yes, it's true same

melody I've changed my ways I'm ready for you Laural, do something crazy Let's get married I'll get a job Let's have a family Maria:

(from outside

behind pod) Oh Jonas, I hear you I know that you're in there with Laural Jonas: Maria! Maria:'

(at the door) Oh Jonas, please hear me I need to tell you something. Now open, open the door Jonas:

(opens the door) Oh, damn! Maria How did you find me here? Maria: I've something to say Jonas: Some other time! Let me talk to you Jonas: How did you find me? Maria: I saw your pod Jonas: You followed me Maria: Coincidence. Jonas: You psycho bitch Laural: Please watch your tongue Jonas: She followed me Maria: I swear I didn't Jonas: Then whaddaya want Maria: I want to speak to you Jonas: get outta my life Maria: You're such a creep Laural: The both of you! Maria: He's such a creep Jonas: You're such a freak Following me wherever I go don't be so cruel Telling me you need to talk to me I do, I do When all along you have nothing to say I'll say it then # Breaking into tears at the slightest provocation There's a reason for my tears and then you wonder why I won't have you You're psycho! You're psycho! ↓½ Maria I've had it up to here I've kept this secret from you True, you may be a good f* Cuz I didn't want to lose you But how could I tell my mom that my wife does crystal ████? Now you leave me no choice but to I've found someone steady and pure tell you. I'm having your Get out you psycho bitch get out get out! baby! You're what? I'm having your baby! Maria: Oh Jonas, I've told you Now you know why I've been crazy Jonas: Maria, I'm sorry (shuts door) Oh, she's a liar You're the liar She's just trying to trap me God forgive you Maria is nothing to me Maria is all that you've got Laural you're all that I want Maybe you could have had me Maybe you thought I was joking before Maybe you could have had me But now you must know that I'm not if you'd grown up a little bit sooner Now I know for sure and thought about your life I've changed my ways but it's too late I'm ready for you You're much too late I'll cut my hair pathetic man I'll get a job despicable man I'll quit the band too late

ACT II

Jonas: Boy, I've really done it this time Now I finally see what it is I want and I want it so — with all my heart I sacrificed it all for the momentary pleasures I should have I should have Now I finally see what it is I want and I want it so with all my heart Wuan: Dude! Dude! Dude! Dondó: Dude! Jonas: What! W + D: Dude! Jonas: What! Wuan: Good news! Good news! Good news! Jonas: What! W + D: Dude! Wuan: a record company— Dondó: a guy from a record company— Wuan: he says he likes our shit— Dondó: he gave us his business card— W + D: Dude! Jonas: What does this mean! It means we're gonna be stars! It means we're gonna be rich! Dude! ...etc. Boy, I've really done it this time Now I finally see what it is I want and I want it with all my heart. I want it with all my heart This is beginning to hurt this is beginning to be serious it used to be a game, now it's a cryin' shame cuz you don't wanna play around no more

turns out there's no goal there to be accomplished. Turns out they were just guinea pigs being filmed the whole time. Thanks for participation. There are 5 light speed transporters that will bring them back but they realize that with Maria's baby there are now 6. Jonas volunteers to be stranded. He sings longtime sunshine as the transporters take off and the star supernovas.

Goodbye friends

Goodbye my girl

I close my eyes as you fly away