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Pompous toddler of the cabinet

In 1986, Liberals were accusing the Tories of using terrorism as a cover to sic the police on political enemies. “The hon. gentleman should know that I did not say … I would be sending in the police to interrogate people with whom I disagreed,” said Solicitor General Perrin Beatty. “Otherwise, they would have been around to see him by now.” If Beatty had tried to enrage the Liberals, he succeeded. Cries of “throw the bum out” followed and — from future Newfoundland premier Brian Tobin — the declaration “pompous toddler of the cabinet.”

Cram it, you unmanly sewer pipes

In the midst of the First World War, the Unionist government of Robert Borden was orchestrating what is arguably one of the most rigged elections in Canadian history. Among the tricks that would ensure a re-elected pro-war government in 1917? Giving the vote to women — but only to women with a family member at the front lines. If certain Liberals had a problem with ladies at the polls, “they are living on humbug and nothing else,” said the mustachioed Conservative William H. Bennett — before then taking a dig at the “manliness” of the opposition. A Liberal tried to pipe up, prompting Bennett to shoot back “let the political sewer-pipe from Carleton county possess his soul in patience.” Bennett withdrew the comment at the speaker’s request, but promised to “make it outside the House at the earliest opportunity.”

Dropping the salmon

NDP-ers (just like the CCF before them) punch above their weight for quotable House of Commons outbursts. B.C. NDP-er James Fulton was no Pat Martin, but in 1985 he did hide a dead salmon in his pants before entering the House of Commons. The Parliamentary record describes what happened during a debate over government restrictions on sockeye fishing in the Babine River: “Where upon Mr. Fulton crossed the floor and placed a salmon on the Prime Minister’s desk.”