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This argument about protecting the rights of the disabled surprised a lot of people ... including the disabled. Mark Perriello, the president and CEO of the American Association of People with Disabilities (and someone who is partially blind), told Mother Jones that he'd never heard about the idea that he was somehow getting fucked over by the free Internet. He also said it was rather "convenient" that the best way to help disabled people is to let cable companies earn enough money to become Game of Thrones-powered supervillains.

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"If it wasn't for net neutrality, he'd have robot legs by now."

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So let this be a lesson to overpaid lobbyists everywhere: The next time you want to pretend you're looking out for the interests of some minority group, at least have the decency to try to bribe their spokespeople first.