As the spread of coronavirus has caused more Americans to isolate indoors, there have been many effects both on how people use the internet and on infrastructure itself—everything from changing behaviors, to reshaping work and education, to putting pressure on the grid. The Onion looks at the effects of coronavirus on the internet.




Coworkers discovering entirely digital character traits to dislike about you.



Likelihood of answering FaceTime call up 120%.



Uptick of bizarre celebrity videos revealing they need us more than we need them.




Slight 2% increase in search queries for “COVID-19 symptoms” over 2018.



Google Maps usage up 30% so people can make sure it’s all still there.



Data shortages forcing Netflix to prioritize traffic for those less far into their shows.




American schools struggling to adapt to online active-shooter drills.



Pornographic films skipping theaters and going straight to streaming platforms.



Discovering internet grid one more thing private industry could have made fully functional but chose not to.

