PM: Clean coal. Dig it up, wash it, rinse it out, put the less-good stuff back in the ground, really deep so no-one sees it and sell the really excellent clean stuff. Everyone's happy.

One of Dexion's boutique management firms, Resonance Asset Management, focuses on renewable energy. Credit:Jessica Shapiro

Hunt: We'd all be happy to hear your ideas, my Leader.

Hunt: Ummm. We've been looking at something along those lines for some time. Costs money. A lot.

PM: Right. We need to find some cash. The coal industry's starving for it. Ideas?

Treasurer Joe Hockey: Rip it out of those offensive windmills. They're hurting the coal industry.

PM: Excellent, Joe! We need more of this sort of brilliance. Anyone?

Finance Minister Mathias Cormann: I concur with Joe. And I've noticed too many people are getting free power from the sun. Straight from those hideous subsidised things on the roof. We've got to put a stop to it.