I bought my cats a 6-pack of those real-fur mousies. This is not a great vegan purchase, but they love them. This is why I have to buy more of them, because they disappear. Every once in awhile, we’ll find a cache of them hidden somewhere, like a closet or under the sofa, but when I LOOK in those places I never find them.

Taco will go apeshit over them. He spent an hour stalking, throwing and batting them.

“Go get the video camera,” I said to myself. “This would make a lovely video blog post.”

Except when the video camera goes on, all action stops. As far as I can tell, there is no way for the cats to actually know they are being recorded. There’s no flashing red light. No whirring of a shutter. It’s effing digital.

But they know! From all the video I have captured of my cats, one would think they are lazy slobs who move only to go sit in another area. I tried for 10 minutes and gave up.

Taco went from “whoa dude, I’m totally stoned” to “methed out mouse fiend” the SECOND I put it down.

They’re such a-holes.