Evangelical gatekeepers have been wringing their hands over the departure of yet another once-saved Christian, now lost to the clutches of the Episcopal Church.

Are your evangelical friends safe from the menace of creeping Episcopalianism? Can you be sure?

Here are 24 warning signs to watch out for.

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1. You say “How’re you doing?” and they respond “And also with you.”

2. They say they wish there was more scripture and Bible-reading in worship.

3. They like to read infamously Anglican author N.T. Wright.

4. They’ve recently gotten engaged to a Whitney, an Astor, a Morgan or a Vanderbilt. (This one mostly only applies locally here near the Main Line.)

5. During the Lord’s Prayer, you once heard them start to say “trespasses.”

6. They sometimes use the word “altar” when talking about something other than an altar-call.

7. They’ve taken to sometimes calling the Apostle Paul “Saint Paul.”

8. They like to read infamously Anglican author John Stott.

9. They gave up something for Lent.

10. They know what Lent is.

11. They’re fond of candles.

12. They once accidentally referred to Pastor Jim as “Father Jim.”

13. They think Jesus turned water into wine, not into Welch’s Concord Grape Juice.

14. They seem to prefer hymns and hymnals to PowerPoint praise choruses.

15. They like to read infamously Episcopalian author Madeleine L’Engle.

16. They mentioned some writer who was a gay Christian and you were like, “Wait, don’t you mean an ex-gay Christian?” and they were just kind of like, “No, he’s a Christian and he’s gay, so anyway …”

17. When asked to lead a prayer, they pull out one and start reading it, as though that counts.

18. You once heard them refer to the Lord’s Supper as the “Eucharist.”

19. They once corrected you after you said something about the “Episcopalian Church.”

20. They like to listen to infamously Anglican musician Bono.

21. They describe “O Come, O Come Emmanuel” as an Advent carol.

22. They suspiciously suggest that a 15-minute homily might be preferable to a 45-minute sermon.

23. They like to read infamously Anglican author C.S. Lewis.

24. Seriously, they wish there was more scripture and Bible-reading in worship.