I was out of town for a couple of weeks, and it looks like I missed some excitement around the Mountain Xpress — specifically in the film section. At first, I was saddened by the absence of the generally excellent reviews that Scott Douglas wrote, and I was surprised to hear that the Xpress will be soliciting reviews from the community at large. While I applaud the impulse to include a wider variety of viewpoints, I’m not sure that movie reviews are the best place to start.

I may be old-fashioned, but I tend to give more weight to opinions that are informed by years of intensive experience in a given field over those that, well, aren’t. (This is aside from the fact that even film reviews with which I may consistently disagree are valuable precisely because of their consistency.)

I am, however, trying to practice radical acceptance in this and many other matters. In that spirit, I wondered what else in the Xpress might be improved by a multiplicity of voices. Moving on toward the back of the paper, the next logical place for change might be the horoscope. Why should we continue to gain our astrological insight from the heavy-handed authority of Rob Brezsny? Why not consider what other stargazers might see in the night sky? Thus, I respectfully submit my own astrological readings for the week ahead:

I once took a bus from Berlin to Hamburg. Even though it only took about a half-hour longer than the train — and it was considerably cheaper — I found that I preferred to ride the rails. My readings of the astrological omens suggest that you, [insert your sign here], will have a similar experience in the coming weeks, although, to be perfectly honest, with all the inclement weather we’ve had lately, those omens have been hard to read. I guess take your best shot. Or whatever.

Thanks for being there for us,

— Richard Benson

Barnardsville