Cayden, Rylee and Kelsey are 9-year-old triplets. The girls play softball and Cayden tried baseball, but hated it. He would rather play on his sisters' team, coached by their father — but he can't, he's been told by the softball league, because he's a boy.

He didn't give up after he was told he couldn't play alongside his sisters representing Old Tappan in the eight-town league for the Northern Valley. He wrote a letter stating his case.

"I see no reason why boys can't play softball just because they are a different gender," Cayden wrote. "If you ask me that sounds a lot like segrigation [sic]."

In response to his letter, Cayden was again told he can't play in the girls softball league, which includes players from Closter, Cresskill, Demarest, Haworth, Harrington Park, Norwood, Northvale and his town of Old Tappan.

On a recent clear spring afternoon in Old Tappan, Cayden practiced with his sisters and laughed as he rounded the bases on the local softball field. Cayden said he tried baseball. It's not for him.

"I played baseball for a couple of years, and those years I couldn't wait for the season to be over. But softball, when I practice, I almost never want it to end because I'm having so much fun with my friends," Cayden said.

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In January, Cayden wrote his letter and mailed it to Old Tappan's Recreation Commission. He said it was unjust that he could not participate in the Northern Valley Girls Softball League.

Cayden had been practicing and attending softball clinics, but said he wants to play in a real game.

His father, Will Walsh, said the Old Tappan Recreation Commission tried to work with the family and initially suggestedthat Cayden sit on the bench with the team, but not play. The family was later told league rules don't allow Cayden to sit on the bench.

"Being on the bench at least was a big thing for him, to be a part of the team," said Cayden's mother, Nikki Walsh.

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If Old Tappan had its own league, Cayden would be allowed to play, said commission Chairman Cort Gwon. He said Old Tappan is "a forward-thinking town," and in February, in response to Cayden's request, it approved a co-ed softball league. Cayden was the first player to register.

"That's our long-term vision," Gwon said of the co-ed league. "It takes time to set a program and a league up."

The commission is also coordinating non-league softball games in which Cayden will be allowed to participate, Gwon said.

"We are very lucky to have [Cayden] in town," Gwon said.

That's great for the future, said the Walsh family, but what about now?

Will and Nikki Walsh said they are not satisfied with the league's decision to keep Cayden off the team.

Cayden mailed his letter in January. At the end of February, the league changed its bylaws to include wording that it is a girls-only league and changed its name from Northern Valley Softball League to Northern Valley Girls Softball League.

Tom Antoshack, acting secretary of the league, said the changes to the bylaws and name of the league were simply clarifications and that adjustments and clarifications to the bylaws are common around February, leading up to the season. Antoshack said there have always been female-specific words such as "her" in the bylaws.

"I've been coaching for over 20 years. It's always been a girls league," he said.

Antoshack also supported the idea of a co-ed softball league if it has the amount of volunteer support and player participation needed.

Changes to the bylaws were for clarification that the league is for girls and was not in response to Cayden's request, said Jim Oettinger, recreation director for Closter.

"The rules have always been that it is a girls softball league," Oettinger said. "We think it's wonderful that [Cayden] wants to play co-ed softball."

Oettinger said the situation would be different if there were no baseball program, but noted that this is not the case.

"Right now there's a place for boys and a place for girls," Oettinger said. "If one boy joins, what's to say that 10 or 20 boys won't want to join?"

"It's not like I'm sending Babe Ruth's son out there. Cayden just wants to have fun and play softball," Will Walsh said, as he continues to go to bat for his son.

A softball coach for his daughters' team for the last four years, Walsh said he's getting some pushback because of his son's letter. He said he has been approached by people who have told him to stop pushing for his son to play.

"I don't want to say names; that's not what this is about. But I've been approached by individuals telling me to stop pressing on this or they might take me off coaching," he said.

The threats won't stop the effort, Walsh said.

"Years from now I don't want him to look at me and say, 'Hey, remember when I wanted to play softball and you didn't stand up for me?' " he said.

Email: zuritaa@northjersey.com

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