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If democrats wanna win in 2020, all they need is 75,000 voters in 3 states to switch parties. Today’s women’s march was a good example of how to NOT achieve this end.

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It’s really, really simple. Donald Trump is the President because 75,000 people in Wisconsin, Michigan, and Pennsylvania who voted for Obama in 2012, ended up voting voted for Trump in 2016. That’s it. All the democrats have to do to take back the White House in 2020 is convince 75,000 people in Wisconsin, Michigan, and Pennsylvania to vote for their candidate instead of voting for Trump again.

But instead, it appears as if they only want to gather with other like minded people in large groups and convince themselves that they are under assault. That’s what happened today all over the country as part of the “women’s march.” Millions of women all over the country gathered in various cities to protest…something. Guess what every single one of them had in common? They all voted for Hillary. Not one person marching today voted for Trump. I mean, just look at these women:

Sixty year old, upper middle class white women, from the pricey Boston suburbs, more than likely with hyphenated last names. This was Hillary’s base. Obama won overwhelmingly twice because he built a coalition of working class, black, white, hispanic, urban, and suburban voters. He won states like Indiana and North Carolina because of it. States democrats never win. Hillary couldn’t attract those people. But she had these chicks:

So that’s good. But how does this help bring those 75,000 people to the democratic party? Spoiler alert – it doesn’t.

A great way to make sure your coalition doesn’t grow is to make sure that all women aren’t welcomed:

Intersectional feminism does not include a pro-life agenda. That's not how it works! The right to choose is a fundamental part of feminism. — roxane gay (@rgay) January 16, 2017

Horrified that the @womensmarch has partnered w/an anti-choice org. Plse reconsider – inclusivity is not about bolstering those who harm us. — Jessica Valenti (@JessicaValenti) January 16, 2017

https://t.co/WLHocj9Y8U If you support forced birth, please stay at home. No misogyny at the Women's March! — Amanda Marcotte (@AmandaMarcotte) January 21, 2017

Yea, sorry, but if your opinion on abortion differed from that of the organizers, then you were kicked out. Because I guess the millions of women in America who happen to be anti-abortion rights aren’t really women. They’re some sort of closeted transgender males.

Look, I don’t care what your opinion on abortion is. That’s not what we’re here to discuss. I’m just pointing out that this is a strategy that will not help you at all. Your worst nightmare is President. You have to do something different if you want him out. Instead you’re just doing more of the same by alienating people you need.

You’ve obviously learned nothing, but please, keep doing what you’re doing. Keep having Lena Dunham and Mike Brown’s Mom speak at your conventions. Keep banking on elitist millionaires like Madonna, Meryl Streep, Amy Schumer, and Lady Gaga to convince people that you’re the party of the common man. Things are obviously going great for you.

Oh, and the speakers today made a lot of strong points that probably convinced many of those 75,000 people you need to switch sides. Like this one from Madonna:

Blowing up the White House. Perfectly normal. I know there’s a bunch of women in Wisconsin who heard that and said,

“ya know what, I voted for Trump this time, but now that Madonna says she wants to commit an act of terrorism at the White House, I’m gonna switch my vote in 2020.”

Or how bout Ashley Judd’s amazing speech today. Just watch this clearly sane, rational woman recite some sort of demented poem about Trump having wet dreams about his daughters:

“I am not as nasty as your own daughter being your favorite sex symbol, like your wet dreams infused with your own genes.”

With supporters like this, how can you lose? I know there’s at least a few thousand middle of the road voters in Pennsylvania who watched that speech and said, “

I can’t vote for a guy who has wet dreams about his daughter. This changes everything. What have I done?”

If you haven’t watched that video, seriously watch it. She rails on about all of the following:

white privilege

her blood-stained bed sheets she had to throw away after her period

the unfairness of millionaires like her having to pay taxes on tampons

black people in prison in shackles and braids, simply because they’re black

“Hitler is in these streets. A mustache traded for a toupee. Nazis renamed the cabinet. Electro conversion therapy the new gas chambers shaming the gay out of America, turning rainbows into suicide notes.”

This is how democrats expect to take back the White House? Where are all the sane democrats telling them to stop? I know you’re out there because I’m friends with a bunch of you. Trump is Hitler? Gas chambers for gay people? People cheered for this. They went nuts. They genuinely loved it.

And I’m sorry, but how is the unemployed worker in Michigan who lost his job because his company outsourced labor to Mexico supposed to relate to this? Is this supposed to get him or her to come back in 2020 and vote for the democratic candidate? Because that’s literally the ONLY way to get rid of Donald Trump. You tried the whole, “find every annoying nutjob and give them a microphone” thing. Didn’t go too well. Might wanna switch it up.

Oh, and this was convincing:

“Why were the female actors paid less than half of what the male actors earned?”

So, is the independent voter from Wisconsin looking to pay his or her mortgage next month supposed to feel bad for Jennifer Lawrence because she didn’t make as much money as Bradley Cooper in Silver Linings Playbook?

Oh, and speaking of Jennifer Lawrence, she’ll be the first to explain why the “gender pay gap” exists in Hollywood:

“I failed as a negotiator because I gave up early. I didn’t want to keep fighting over millions of dollars that, frankly, due to two franchises, I don’t need. There definitely wasn’t any foul play involved on Sony’s part. They’re not going to give somebody more money, if they don’t ask for it. There was no foul play from the men or anybody making that movie.”

Ya see, actors and actresses submit bids when they audition for roles. They let the producers know how much money they’d need to be paid in order to perform in the movie. Jennifer Lawrence admittedly is a “failed negotiator” who “gave up.” She didn’t want to haggle over a few million dollars that she “doesn’t need.” Her male counterparts obviously weren’t that nice to the studios who will make hundreds of millions off her movies. And as she pointed out, they’re not gonna pay someone more money if they don’t ask for it. The gender pay gap isn’t because of sexism. It exists because women like Jennifer Lawrence aren’t as cutthroat as their male counterparts.

But none of these facts matter at rallies like this. Because the people at these marches don’t care about facts. They only care about emotions. And people like Ashley Judd evoke these emotions by making up lies like this:

“Even when we do go into higher paying jobs, our wages are still CUT with blades, sharpened by testosterone.”

Her wages are lower because they’ve been cut by sharpened blades full of testosterone? Yea, that’s what happened. Either that or they just “gave up early” like Jennifer Lawrence said they did.

Then there was this:

“Why is the work of a black woman and a hispanic woman worth only 63 and 54 cents of a white man’s privileged daughter.”

Wait…..what? Now they’re shitting on white chicks? I thought this was about bringing women together. Because it sounds a lot like they’re trying to make white women feel bad about their salaries. Ya know, because of racism and stuff.

“Our pussies ain’t for grabbing. Our pussies are for our pleasure.”

Yup, talking about your pleasureful pussy is definitely a winning strategy to get 500 Michigan voters to jump ship to the democrats in 2020. Look, if Donald Trump tries grabbing your pussy, I promise you right now that I will kick his ass. No shitting you. Secret Service be damned. I will not stand by and let him grab your pussy. Problem solved.

And that woman in Scranton, PA who voted for Trump because she was worried her husband would lose his job down at the plant – yea, I’m sure she wants to hear more about eating your pussy.

Because that’s a convincing argument that resonates with the 75,000 blue collar voters who turned this election in Trump’s favor.

Oh, and more fupasloths up front please:

Because that chick definitely makes me wanna switch teams in 2020. Sign me up.

Oh, and the media being complicit is definitely helping with headlines like this:

That was a interesting wording for a headline. But the fact of the matter is that these marches today got INSANE media coverage. Ya know what won’t get the same coverage? The march on Washington in six days. Ya know, the one that’s been going on for 40 years for women and men who oppose abortion rights. The one that is significantly larger than the march in Washington today on an annual basis. It’s almost as if Trump has struck a chord and resonated with voters when he pointed out the elephant in the room that we can all see – the media is full of shit.

The best part about today was the fact that when you looked out in the audience all you saw was this:

And this

Women's March NYC plenty of pink pussy hats everywhere!#WomensMarch pic.twitter.com/BeR7wLYh6G — Stephanie Shapiro (@stefshap) January 21, 2017

And this:

And this:

It’s hard being an upper middle class white woman in America. They might as well have called this the Million Menopause March for White Women. That’s why up on stage this is what you saw:

Because the only diversity was with the speakers. Of course this was done intentionally, knowing that the cameras would be on the speakers, not the audience. See, women of all colors, creeds, and religions are united over……something. We’re not quite sure what that is, but there’s a shit ton of them so it must be important. And they’re marching. Except in Chicago where there were too many of them so they all stood in place. These same women who all hate Donald Trump disproportionally watched this reality TV show. And they all disagree with his positions on gay marriage, maternity leave, and the war in Iraq. Oh wait, no they don’t. They actually agree with him on all of those. But nevertheless, the march must continue, because as Ashley Judd pointed out, he is in fact Hitler.

Anyway, you know which president no one protested against? Bill Clinton. Even though he was accused of sexually assaulting countless women, and used his position of authority to get braindead 24 year old interns to exercise their polepolishers in remote closets in the White House. But I guess as long as he inserted cigars in their pussies, rather than grabbing them by them, it’s all good in the hood. Nothing fraudulent about that. Nothing at all.

The bottom line is anyone who went to this is a joke. Sorry, but it’s true. You fell for it because you didn’t think it through. You acted on emotion instead of reason. And more importantly, Turtleboy is trying to help you out here. You’re really good at getting Trump elected, so we’re trying to help you make sure that doesn’t happen in 2020. And the only way to do that is to get those 75,000 people in Wisconsin, Michigan, and Pennsylvania to change their minds. The shitshow that occurred today is the exact opposite of what you should be doing in order to achieve that end.

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