(Picture: Lucy Clark)

Two years ago, I made the decision to give up refereeing. Not because I wanted to, but because I was transitioning, so I felt I had no choice.

As the 2016 season ended, I decided to continue for one more year, which took me up to the end of the 2018 season. And when I completed this, it was time to finally hang up my whistle.

But in my heart of hearts, it did not feel right.

I was still relatively young, and although I needed to get my fitness levels back after a period of illness, I was still fit enough. I loved football and I loved refereeing, which meant I was giving it up for all the wrong reasons – because I am transgender.




I decided that I wanted to continue doing what I love, so I spoke to the FA, and to my good friend Kellie Maloney, about my situation. Although we knew it would become news, the decision was made – I would continue.

There wasn’t much of a wait, as the week after we came to the decision, I was on the pitch for my first game as a transgender referee.

We decided that rather than letting the story come out after I had stepped on the pitch, we would take control, and with the help of Kellie, we got the story out to the world.

Lucy, before she transitioned (Picture: Lucy Clark)

I never expected it to be front page news though! Messages of support were coming through by the dozen, and I headed off to QPR training ground to referee my first game as me for the first time last week.

On my way there, I was extremely nervous. I was worried about the reaction of the people, and who would be attending the game.

But when I got to the grounds, things just became routine.

I exchanged the team sheets as usual, and I advised the managers of the situation just in case they hadn’t seen the papers. They were very supportive, and one asked me what I wanted him to call me. ‘Ref will do,’ I replied.

I really appreciated the way they handled the situation, it really helped to put me at ease.

Then I went to the changing room and got changed.

The level of game I was refereeing meant I had no assistants with me on the day, so my wife joined me for moral support.

When it was the time for me to go out for the game, I took a deep breath and walked out onto the pitch.

I saw the small crowd that had gathered, and the players on the pitch.

I went over to brief the assistants and captains, and waited for what seemed like an eternity while the teams got into their own huddles. Then they finally lined up, ready for kick off. A short, sharp blast of the whistle again and we were under way.

Lucy during the match (Picture: Lucy Clark)

And five minutes in, it felt just like any other game. I was relieved.

The next 90 minutes saw a really good game of football, with QPR winning 4-2, and only one caution for a rash challenge; it was just like any other good game I had previously refereed.



The players showed lots of respect, and there were no issues whatsoever. The supporters in attendance were just the same as any other game, with only the usual football-related comments I have heard at my previous 1000+ games.

After 90 minutes, I ended the game, happy with my performance as a referee.

I received the usual number of handshakes I would expect at this level, and the manager of the team who had the player cautioned came over to have a moan about the yellow card. Nothing has changed – it was just another game.

I chatted with a few of the supporters, and they were all really positive too.

Afterwards, we hopped into the car and drove to a local pub with some friends for a celebratory drink. It tasted good, and I was relieved to have got this first game under my belt.

I received so many positive messages on Twitter since, including a couple of fantastic messages from players who had taken part in the game stating, ‘What a great ref too I must say! Was great to be refereed by her today’ and ‘Glad you had the confidence to be you today. Best ref we’ve had since I started.’

Amazing!

I am now on the road to my next 1,000 games, as the real me.

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