Some people have children. And that is great. There is nothing more beautiful, or horrifying, than babies. The thing with babies is that they require certain things: food, clothes, a home, and, occasionally, love and attention. Depending on what is going on in my life the above might not be readily available, so I don’t have kids. Additionally, I am frightened of all the ways that a baby might be extricated from my body. Also, I don’t want to give up coffee, cigarettes, gin, or raw fish while I am pregnant.

So I have cats. And I call them my babies. Sometimes I put clothes on them. I also sing them songs; they have favorite bands. I have given them middle names and last names.

On other, happier, lifestyle blogs you might see pictures of chubby-faced babies in adorable outfits, or tasting ice cream for the first time. You might see cute families encouraging the baby to look at the camera for one of their millions of family portraits.

There will be none of that here. Instead there will be many pictures of my two babies: Liono and George. Sometimes they might be wearing clothing; sometimes they might be sharing pasta and Yuenglings with me. But they will certainly be present. Often. Also, I might make music videos about cats.