Gaming peripherals are a huge part of what it takes to be the leetest, most edgy CoD kid out there and so we’re proud to exclusively reveal the latest jump in gaming hardware - the hands-free keyboard. No longer will dainty gamer digits have to suffer at the hands of salt and rage, instead the new Airhammer APR01 keyboard will allow you to game completely hands-free.

The keyboard will feature hybrid technologies bridging EEG measuring hardware and employing the power of the cloud and the Internet of Things. The APR01 primarily functions by recording the electrical activity along a person’s scalp and then measuring the voltage fluctuations resulting from ionic current flows within the neurons of the brain. The keyboard will also automatically read the air pressure and temperature of the room, as well as the ocular movements to gauge a user’s intentions and then translate that data into keypresses.

“Many gamers have been crying out for such a device,” said April Forster, chief engineer at Airhammer. “You can’t put a price on a fit pinkie, and we believe the Airhammer APR01 will be the ultimate hands-free gaming solution.”

Electroencephalographs don’t come cheap so the keyboard will set a user back roughly £2200 for the basic model, and £2350 for the Synergy Edition which comes with a special hard gel coating for the neurodes that prevent chafing or soreness from prolonged uses. Hardware experts have estimated that users operating the basic edition may experience some mild discomfort after 2 or more hours of prolonged use, so for those of you who want the best experience possible the extra money will be entirely worth it.

An interesting feature of the Airhammer is that it will take some time to set up for each session. It has been reported that it takes roughly 20 minutes to apply all the electrodes, which will be connected to a user’s head for the duration of the gaming session. Professional eSports players have already reported that extra setup time is completely worth it, with Starcraft legend Jung “Mvp” Jong Hyun observing a 4.1% increase in APM with the Airhammer.

For gamers it means you can tuck into that grab bag of Cheetos without breaking stride, fuelling yourself with gallons of Mountain Dew while nailing a perfect headshot. It will also help halt widespread finger erosion which has become a pandemic in this post-keyboard world. Many long term gamers who’ve been tapping away since the 70’s have reported millimetres being shaved off through repeated button pressing, but at long last we can put an end to this terrible affliction.