I contacted the Black Veil Brides Army customer service after someone stole my log and this is what they had to say:

Hello [redacted],

Thank you for contacting the BVB Army, and we're sorry to hear about your experience with us.

As you know, the Black Veil Brides Army is dedicated to providing only the creamiest log of shit to the fucking throats of all the girls and boys of the world and we will gladly lay down our lives to ensure the flow of Andy's log is uninterrupted on its pathway from his asshole to your fucking throat.

We will be investigating this matter with specialists trained in these sorts of matters and will contact you when they have their findings.

May the warmth from Andy's sopping love loaf keep you warm in the darkest and coldest of times.

Regards,

Sergeant Samuel Shitswallow,

Customer Service Specialist

Black Veil Brides Army Department of Log Sucking and Sphincter Licking