Sole Food

I think there’s a lot of creatures out there in this category. Look at the hippopotamus, for example. It looks fucking ridiculous. One would think there was no more harmless piece of derp on the planet, judging by appearances. But ohhh no. Not only are these bastards armoured like a tank, they’re also perfectly capable of chomping you in half, can run about twice as fast as the average human and are notoriously foul tempered to boot. Children’s books should really stop portraying them as tubby, amiable dolts and instead cast them as the all powerful agents of destruction that they really are. Instill the fear while they’re young, I say.