Chapter Text

"Well it sure was nice having you over, Kris! I tell you, it's a shame we don't get to see each other more often!"

"Eh, works for me."

"Oh... really?"

"Yeah. You're old, lame, and uncool. If we keep hanging out, you're going to cramp my style, old man."

"W-Well, if you really feel that way-"

"Nah, I'm kidding. It was real fun hanging out with you too, dad. See you."

"Ha ha, oh you little rascal! Have a safe trip home... OH! And don't forget to bring these tulips with you! Tori always had a soft spot for them, and when she finds a bunch waiting for her when she gets home tomorrow... ha, well that ought to make her day!"

"...yeah, I bet it will. Probably..."

With a bouquet of white tulips in hand and the autumn air blowing in his face, Kris stepped out of Asgore Dreemurr's flower shop and walked down the moonlit path leading home. Today had been a good day, for the most part: for the first time in a while, he paid his adoptive father a visit that lasted longer than a few brief minutes. In fact, he actually pitched in with a lot of Asgore's busy work: he helped fix up his pitiful living quarters so he wouldn't have to sleep in squalor, he did a grocery run to stock his fridge with more food than just one pickle, and helped sell flowers by assertively putting his foot down and making sure his good-hearted, if overly generous father actually charged money for his bouqets.

It was quite different from Kris' typical routine when it came to weekends alone: he was usually content to play video games, listen to the CD's Asriel left him, or mess around online. He tended to avoid chores and busy work like the plague, and as friendly as he was, being around Asgore just felt uncomfortable due to the tension and pain related to his and Toriel's rather brutal and messy divorce... but his adventure in the Dark World changed all of that. Or more specifically, watching his new friend Lancer get brutalized by his own father, who then threatened to murder him on the spot made him really appreciate having Asgore as his dad. Was he embarassingly prone to hugs? Yes. Was he a terrible businessman? Oh yes. But at the end of the day he was still a nice guy and a loving father, and never treated him any differently than his biological son Asriel. Kris was eternally grateful to be adopted by a guy like Asgore… which made it all the more heartbreaking that his flowers were going in the trash.

It wasn't a decision Kris made lightly, mind you. He wanted nothing more than for Toriel to return home from her faculty retreat and have her heart melt at the sight of such beautiful flowers waiting for her, all the drama and arguments between her and Asgore tossed aside as they repaired their broken bridges... but he wasn't naïve. Things didn't work that way. He had her routine memorized by now: she'd roll her eyes, make a snotty remark that went something along the lines of "Oh, flowers. Typical." and may or may not toss them in the garbage in front of him depending on if her hatred for Asgore outweighed her love for him that particular day. So what was the point of bringing these flowers home if their ultimate fate was to languish under a pile of Toriel's trash? And thus, Kris resolved to toss them in the dumpster behind the local diner: it would cut out the middleman, and would leave Toriel in a better mood since he wasn't constantly reopening the wounds of their divorce. Given his low grades and lack of awards compared to his big bro, Kris didn't need to look like a bigger disappointment...

'Sorry, dad. I'll find some way to make up for this.' Kris promised as he approached the diner, which still felt homey and welcoming despite the dark windows and huge "We're closed, sorry!" sign visible from inside the glass doors. 'Maybe I should get that Sinder app Bratty loves so much installed on your phone...'

But the sudden, jarring sound of something heavy banging against metal behind the diner made Kris nearly jump out of his skin, and all thoughts of helping his dad meet sexy singles in his area took a backseat to alertness and tension.

'What the-'

Another bang, this one followed by a raspy, menacing growl of "Dammit!" before the speaker struck whatever earned their ire again. Whoever they were, there was no way they were up to any good. Suspecting an attempt at breaking into the diner through the back door, Kris reached towards his pants pocket for his phone only for his arm to fall limp at his side. He thought back to his adventures in the Dark World where he fought bizarre creatures and even stranger people with a sword and shield, and a half-grin spread across the left side of his lips. He dropped the tulips, picked up a thick stick that was laying on the sidewalk, then gripped it firmly as he snuck around the back of the diner. In the past he would have been more than willing to let Officer Undyne and her boys in blue handle this sort of thing, but now that he had combat experience under his belt? He was positive he could kick this unseen criminal's ass. After all, what was a common burglar to a person who defeated an insane jester that could do anything?

Grabbing the base of his stick with both hands, Kris crept around the side of the diner with his weapon held near his chest and as he got closer to the corner, he could hear the speaker mumbling under their breath.

"Oh come the hell on, some people have to EAT, you stupid assholes!"

And upon hearing their voice better, Kris gasped and dropped his stick, the sound of it falling covered by the sound of fists against metal. 'Wait a minute, that voice... oh hey, I know who that is.'

Gruff, growly, yet noticeably feminine and with a slight hint of a southern twang to it... Kris peered around the corner behind the diner and sure enough, he was staring right at resident face-eating dinosaur bully-turned battle bro (sis?) Susie. Who, surprisingly, wasn't trying to break into the diner through the back door... but rather, was trying and failing to open the dumpster Asgore's flowers were going to be thrown in. It had a thick metal padlock on it that gleamed triumphantly in the late night darkness as it stood up to Susie's punches and kicks, and didn't even budge when she smashed a cinder brick against it.

"Oh my god, are you SERIOUS?!" Susie roared as the brick crumbled into pieces. "What the hell are these things even made of?!"

Susie's next move got a wheezy suppressed chuckle out of Kris: she grabbed the padlock with both hands, kicked her feet up off the ground and squatted against the front of the dumpster with her feet pressed onto it with all their might. "Alright you stupid son of a bitch, you're gonna open up... and you're gonna LIKE IT!"

While Susie strained, groaned, and growled as she tried and failed to rip the lock off the dumpster, Kris was utterly captivated by this bizarre sight. He wasn't sure how he felt on account of all the emotions boiling around in his soul. A part of it was the sort of pity he felt for the coyote who kept trying and failing to catch the roadrunner in those old cartoons he and Asriel would watch. Another part of it was the urge not to laugh, since it was still pretty goofy watching this cantankerous brute go to such ridiculous and cartoonish lengths to open a dumpster. But another part of it? It was a weird, primal sensation that made his spine tingle, his heart race, and his breathing heavy...

...love.

Okay, maybe love was a stretch, but god damn did Susie make him feel things. Her muscular physique, height, eye-obscuring Joey Ramone haircut, grungy fashion sense, freckled cheeks, and surprisingly cute smile all got his heart fluttering for sure. But the sheer passion and bestial aggression she threw into getting shit done, even something as mundane as opening a dumpster... well, that made his heart pound like a jackhammer. He loved girls with limitless determination... and the ability to kick his ass, even if he wouldn't admit it.

Which was why the longer he watched Susie struggle with the padlock, he realized that something was... off. Really, really off. While she was initially feisty and aggressive, her assault on the dumpster grew uncharacteristically wimpy in a hurry. Her breathing was dangerously labored, beads of sweat rolled down her scaly forehead, and her powerful death grip on the locker turned into pathetic, half-assed tugging. It didn't take long for her to simply give up and drop the death grip on the padlock: with an anguished sigh, she planted her feet back on the ground and bent over the edge of the dumpster, breathing like she had run a marathon and clasping a hand over her eyes while she clasped the other to her middle. She stood there for a few seconds, and Kris flinched when he heard a gurgly roaring noise from where Susie stood.

"Ngh…"

Susie squeezed her hand tighter against her stomach and whimpered pitifully while she visibly trembled. The odd gurgling noises continued, and Kris realized that it was the sound of Susie's stomach growling. It was certainly a noise he had grown acquainted with: the girl seemed hungry every waking moment of her life and she was prone to cramming just about anything edible down her throat: other people's lunches, cake, chalk, pinecones, twigs, leaves, allegedly the faces of her bullying victims... Kris never felt too bothered or concerned by it, but now that he not only saw her in legitimate physical pain, but also desperate to break into a dumpster? It was setting off a ton of red flags in the boy's mind, and he resolved to get to the bottom of this.

"Hey. You okay over there?"

Susie flinched and stood up straight before turning around, and grit her yellowed fangs as Kris waved politely at her.

"Wha- oh goddamn it Kris, you trying to give me a heart attack or something?!" Susie snarled with newfound aggression, the moonlight illuminating the blush burning in her freckled cheeks as she stepped away from the dumpster. "Don't sneak up on me like that!"

"Sorry." Kris apologized with a little bow of his head. "Just wanted to make sure you were doing alright."

"Well I was, until you decided to creep up on me like some kinda psycho, you nerd!" Susie slugged Kris on his arm hard enough to make it slightly ache, and he could feel warmth creep into his cheeks in response. "Sheesh... what the hell are you even doing out here, anyway?"

"Not dumpster diving, that's for sure."

Susie flinched in response to Kris' blunt remark, and the color in her cheeks grew more vivid as she tried to formulate an excuse. "Dumpster div- psh, really? Really, dude? That's what you thought I was doing?"

"Yeah."

"WELL I WASN'T!" Susie hollered defensively. She immediately calmed down, but her profuse sweating and fidgety hands weren't lost on Kris. "Nah, man, you see... I was working out."

"Working out?"

"Yeah! I pretended that the dumpster back here was a huge, ugly monster, and was practicing some new ass-kicking techniques! You know, just in case if we run into trouble in the Dark World again!"

Susie was betrayed by her stomach, which snarled angrily at her almost as if it were calling her out on her BS. Susie answered by punching herself in the gut, and laughed nervously while Kris nodded insincerely.

"Mmm hmm."

"Yeah, like... the Knight? Or that queen the crazy clown dude talked about?!" Susie's stomach fought back and growled louder than ever, prompting her to slug it three times. "Th-Those guys sound like real tough sons of bitches, so I'm making sure that I'm still on top of my game if we ever run into them! Heh, at this rate, I'm gonna hand them their asses on a silver platter for sure!"

"Huh. I see."

"Y-Yeah! So you get it, right? I'm NOT dumpster diving, I'm just prepping for the day we kick more bad guy ass! Understood?"

Kris pretended not to hear the gurgling protests of Susie's insides and nodded. "Okay."

"Good! Now why don't run on home? Your mom's gonna have a heart attack if she knows you're out this late!"

"Okay." Kris repeated, prompting a sigh of relief from Susie. He turned around and started heading back towards the sidewalk, but stopped after a few steps. "Oh, Susie..."

"Yeah?"

Kris reached into his pants pocket and removed a fist full of foil wrapped chocolate kisses that he offered to the dino girl. "Here."

"Wh-What?!"

"Friends don't let friends dig in dumpsters for food, you know?"

Susie recoiled in shock, and as she did her bangs parted, revealing a pair of soft, pretty yellow eyes staring down at Kris with bewilderment and shame. Her face burned the hottest it's ever been, and she balled up her claws into fists. "Y-you stupid asshole! What did I tell you I was doing?"

"Working out."

"Yeah, exactly!" Susie barked, now smothering her stomach's complaints with both arms pressed against it. "I'm not digging around for ANYTHING! So... so take your candy and piss off!"

Susie's stomach now made a harsh noise that experts referred to as "Dying whale sounds" which made her double over, grunting and whimpering as she suppressed a cry of pain. She breathed heavily and mustered every bit of willpower she had to keep standing, the tremors racking her body growing in intensity all the while.

"You sound starved, Susie." Kris remarked as he shoved the candies up to her snout, "Come on, I've got milk chocolatey goodness right in the palm of my hand. You know you want it."

"W-Want it?! As if!" Susie hissed, wiping the drool from her lips and backing away. "I've got plenty of REAL food to eat, you know!"

"Like rotten eggs and bad vegetables?"

"Goddamn it Kris, I don't need your charity! So just shut up, and LEAVE ME THE HELL ALONE ALREADY!"

Susie slapped the kisses out of Kris' hand, and shoved him with enough force to smack him against the diner wall. The chocolates clattered onto the pavement and scattered every which way. She then reared back a fist, and Kris put up his arms in self defense. But the punch never came: Susie stumbled and fell to the ground on her knees, and bent over groaning and whimpering.

'Geez, she doesn't even have enough energy to throw a punch...'

Despite nearly having his lights knocked out, Kris couldn't bring himself to be angry with Susie. No, more than anything, he was concerned with her horrible condition... and admittedly, a tad annoyed. She meant a lot to him after saving him from being killed by the King of the Dark World, and he wasn't about to let her starve herself to death out of foolish, stubborn pride. And so he reached into his pocket again, held up his hand, and...

*thwack*

Susie flinched and cried out as a candy kiss bounced off the tip of her snout. She looked up at Kris, whose bangs parted to reveal red eyes that were narrowed sternly as he grabbed another kiss from the pile in his hand.

"What the- hey!"

*thwack*

Kris pelted her with another kiss, this one bouncing off the top of her snout. Susie threw up an arm defensively just in time to block a third.

"Cut it out!"

Kris lobbed the fourth kiss over Susie's arm and bonked her on the top of her head. She repositioned her arm to cover it, and left her snout open for being pelted by a fifth.

"Dude, I'm serious!"

Kris threw kiss after kiss after kiss, alternating his angles so every piece of candy hit Susie while she ineffectively swatted at them.

"If you don't stop that, I'm... I'm gonna thrash you! I'll bite your face off! I mean it Kris, I totally will!"

Kris was undeterred in his assault, and soon emptied his clip after a rapid-fire series of peltings. With a determined little huff he reached back into his pocket for another handful of chocolates and prepared to throw them, before-

"OKAY, OKAY, YOU WIN! Just... just stop it already..."

-she surrendered. Susie bent over with her hands covering her face, her chest heaving and stomach gurgling as her resolve finally crumbled into powder. Kris grinned proudly as he crouched down to Susie's level and extended his hand full of kisses one last time.

"So... you ready to eat now?"

Without looking up, Susie swiped the kisses out of Kris' hand and shoved them down her maw, metallic foil and all. After swallowing, she desperately began grabbing the other kisses that were laying on the ground before gobbling them up as well. Kris stood back up and crossed his arms triumphantly while Susie wolfed down the last of the chocolates and sighed, content to have something in her belly. She turned up to face Kris and smiled warmly, her golden eyes swimming with tears. It was a side to Susie that few, if any had seen, and Kris felt fortunate to catch the aggressive dinosaur in a far better mood.

"Heh... th-thanks for the candy, nerd. You didn't have to feed me, though..."

"No need to thank me." Kris replied with a chuckle, "And no need to get all teary-eyed on me, either. I had food, you were hungry, it was just the right thing to do."

Susie recoiled and let out a cry of "Grah!" before hastily rubbing the tears from her eyes. "H-Hey now, I'm not crying! Nah, ha ha, It's uh... it's an allergic reaction! Yeah, when I eat aluminum my eyes get all watery, ya know?"

The pair then stood in awkward silence before Kris broke the silence by addressing the elephant in the room... or rather, behind the restaurant. "Hey Susie, is everything okay? You seemed like you were literally starving to death, do you have enough to eat back home?"

That caught Susie off guard alright: the dinosaur's eyes went wide with shock, then she grabbed a muscular bicep and glanced shamefully at the ground. "Wha- what kind of question is that? I mean, thanks for asking and all," Susie blushed briefly at the last part, "But... but I'm doing okay. I had my three square meals for the day, I uh... heh, I guess they just weren't filling. I mean, I'm a growing girl, after all!"

"Really? Like what?" Kris raised an inquisitive eyebrow.

"Well uh... I ate three pinecones and an empty cigarette carton for breakfast, then I swiped a box of colored chalk from some little kids playing hopscotch for lunch and for dinner... well, that weird deer girl fed me. I think Joel's her name?"

"Noelle." Kris corrected.

"Noelle, yeah! I chomped down this red envelope she gave me. Which made her run away bawling, for some reason." Susie tilted her head in confusion while Kris wheezed back a laugh at the poor girl's expense.

"But yeah, like I said: I ate breakfast, lunch, and dinner! But... well, you saw me back there. In spite of eating all of that I was still starving..." Susie turned back towards the padlock on the dumpster, which had a logo Kris was all too familiar with: a picture of a Froggit with a circle and a slash over his face. It was an industrial strength monster-proof lock that you absolutely could not open with brute force: he learned that the hard way when Toriel used one to lock her candy kisses from him. "But seriously, putting locks on their dumpster... so what if I pop in there for a snack every now and then? It's GARBAGE, it's not like they're gonna miss it!"

Suddenly, Susie's stomach growled again. With an irate huff, she slugged herself in the gut and blushed as she turned to face Kris. "Uh... heh, ya got any more candy? I'm still pretty hungry."

"Nah. You ate all of it." Kris admitted, turning his pockets inside out for proof.

"Damn it... well, thanks anyway, dude. I'll find something else to eat, like..." Susie glanced to the side and gasped happily. "A-ha! Like that!"

Susie bent over and grabbed a cigarette butt off the ground. "There are plenty of these laying around! Don't worry Kris, I'm gonna be fine..." Susie flipped the butt into the air and opened her mouth widely... and failed to catch it due to Kris swatting it away. "HEY! What the hell-"

"Hey, hey: relax." Kris urged, waving his hands reassuringly towards Susie. After she calmed down, he continued.

"Look... if you really need something to eat, you can do better than literal garbage or chalk." Kris grinned invitingly. "Let's go to my place. I've got a ton of great food you can snack on over there."

"Whoa! Uh..." Susie sheepishly rubbed the back of her head. "Really? You're cool with letting me come over?"

"Yeah. After saving my ass in the Dark World, it's the least I can do."

Susie frowned and mulled it over. She looked like she desperately wanted to turn down his offer, given her earlier attitude about not needing "charity", but her need for food won out in the end. "Eh, why not?" she answered with a shrug. "I mean, I don't NEED your food, but the stuff at your place ought to be a nice change of pace from what I've been eating."

"Heh, well what are we waiting for? Let's get you something good to eat." Kris and Susie walked out from behind the diner, and made their way to the northernmost part of town. "Just a quick heads up: try not to eat too much. If mom comes home to an empty fridge tomorrow, she's going to have an aneurysm. And not the good kind."

"Aw, what's the matter? Don't want mommy yelling at you?" Susie then slugged Kris in the arm. "Heh, you wimp..."

The pair laughed, both red in the face and their hearts fluttering as they made their way to Kris' house, where a delicious butterscotch-cinnamon pie was just waiting to be devoured...