*featured image: stock photo of unrelated drunk person

I feel old saying this but back in my day, we didn’t have GoFundMe to turn to in case of emergency or, like this, in case of stupid drunken antics. Our humiliation played out in private, although our parents were usually just as pissed at us for being complete morons as parents of today.

Meet Caitlyn Cummings. It appears Caitlyn made a fatal mistake in bringing her dad’s credit card out to the club the other night. Mistake #1. After using it for VIP bottle service, she (or someone she knows trying to be funny) put up a GoFundMe page to pay her dad back. Mistake #2.

The GoFundMe page has since been removed, but unlike blackout drunks, the internet never forgets:

The fundraiser states:

I accidently bought bottle service on my dads credit card. I made a big mistake. I am asking for help to raise at least 100 dollars. I need your help because I would like to stay at the University of Iowa where I can better myself and learn from my mistakes, such as this one. Please believe in me I am better than this. Every dollar counts! Thank you in advance. Go Hawkeyes!

It’s unclear when the page was taken down or by whom.

Self-proclaimed Four Loko Enthusiast Nicole Dale — who apparently attends the University of Iowa with Caitlyn — shared a few texts about the evening in question, one from some guy named Brendan who witnessed Caitlyn ‘dead’ in the club.

We assume “eden” means EDEN Lounge, which boasts bottle service that guarantees “a completely unique, classy and customized member’s only experience.” Apparently that includes babysitting drunk people, which is cool.

“Good friend” Nicole also shares a text allegedly from Caitlyn herself, who is pretty sure her dad will throw her into a cage like a feral animal after what she did:

LOL blackout drinking is so hilar, you guys!

Caitlyn (or whichever troll friend put up the GoFundMe page) raised all of $0 before the fundraiser was removed. If her dad is reading this, please get in touch as we would like to get an official statement from you. LOL *hiccup*

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