Progressives Admit They're Just Not Used To Killing People Who Might Fight Back

U.S.—Many have been criticizing the left for their apparent unwillingness to say that killing terrorists is a good thing. Many suspected they just hated America or were being funded by George Soros or something. But the truth has finally come out.

At long last, the left has admitted their real problem with the strike on Soleimani: they much prefer killing human beings that have no way to defend themselves and can't possibly strike back.

"Blowing up terrorists limb from limb is icky and they might get mad at you," said Rogaine Jillipers, verified internet activist. "But tearing human beings limb from limb when they're in the womb and can't fight back? Now we're talking."

"They'll never retaliate, they'll never say anything at all."

In response to the declaration from the left, many preborn babies have begun arming themselves, causing millions of progressives to back off from their hard pro-abortion stance.

A Babylon Bee subscriber contributed to this report. If you want to get involved with the staff writers at The Babylon Bee, check out our membership options here

Get Free Access To Our Brand New Site: Not the Bee After creating The Babylon Bee in six literal days, Adam Ford rested. But he rests no longer. Introducing Not the Bee — a brand new humor-based news site run by Adam himself. It's loaded with funny content and all the best features of a social network. And the best part? Everyone with a subscription to The Bee gets full access at no extra cost. Get FREE Access *with premium subscription to The Babylon Bee