Oh, that feeling of dread when you see someone smart speak their mind online. And then in come the predator trolls. Tearing the speaker to shreds. Piling on.

These might just be nasty words, but at the extreme end, cyberhate can threaten a victim's life.

Increasingly, online threats don't stay online. My research, undertaken over five years, shows predator trolling — where people use digital devices to do real-life harm — is linked to murder, terrorism, incitement to suicide, stalking, job loss and many other harms. The upper aggregate cost of online harassment to the Australian economy is $3.7 billion.

And the reality is, it's often a person of colour (PoC) getting ripped apart. I'm not saying this to be divisive; I'm saying this because evidence shows that PoC get attacked more online. Women also get attacked more. (Check out Amnesty International's Toxic Twitter and Troll Patrol reports if you really want to get a handle on this.)

As bystanders, we might feel helpless to intervene. Yet just like in the school yard, it's "upstanders" — those who choose to intervene — that make all the difference. In reality, there's plenty we can do to stop cyberhate against others. But before we get to that, let's dig a bit deeper.

What it's like to be a trolling victim?

Mariam Veiszadeh is a lawyer and diversity and inclusion practitioner, and has frequently been the target of extreme trolling — usually as a result of her activism against Islamophobia.

"Whether it was the images of me cuddling a decapitated pig's head, with a message that they'd behead my mother and me and bury us with pigs, or the one that depicted me being stoned to death … they were utterly sickening," she says.

"During the peak of the craziness, the experience was extremely harrowing and all-consuming — its impact extended to my family, my friends and my job.

"I suffered from prolonged anxiety, forcing me to take time off work. I had periods of dizziness and vertigo.

"Reflecting back on it now, I can say it was one of the most difficult experiences that I've had to endure … What people don't realise is the long-lasting impact this has on you and how much it changes your life."

Why 'don't feed the trolls' is (mostly) wrong

We've all heard the expression: "Don't feed the trolls." I used to think it was right. Now I believe it's wrong.

Why did I think it was correct? Well, the academic research shows trolling is correlated with sadism. This means trolls want to hurt and upset you. And without exception, every troll I've interviewed over a five-year period admitted to being a sadist. Therefore, it stands to reason that if you don't respond, you're beating them at their own game.

However, there's a huge problem with this rationale. Take alt-right male trolls as an example. (Yes, there are other types of trolls — but that's a different article.) They police discourse by deliberately attacking anyone they consider "other" — people of colour, women, people with disability, LGBTIQ+ people… the list goes on.

Saying nothing to these trolls means marginalised voices end up being silenced, which is exactly what predator trolls want.

As a victim, it can be pretty harrowing and dangerous to fight back, but this is where bystanders can help.

How people can help stop online bullying

When a tsunami of cyberhate comes your way, it's terrifying. And real. But what if we could literally push that tide back in the opposite direction? I've started thinking of this as reverse-trolling.

Mariam explains it like this: "Just like trolls are no doubt inspired by other notorious trolls, good online Samaritans help inspire others and the generosity spreads, helping to ultimately drown out the negativity."

Here's how.

Reach out to the victim

If you don't feel able to publicly intervene, sending private support to a cyberhate target is a great start. As this advice from the eSafety office suggests, check if your friend is OK and tell them they have your support. (It's written for kids but applies to adults just as much!)

Freelance sports journalist and academic Kate O'Halloran has been the target of trolls on numerous occasions and says private messages are a critical source of comfort.

"I have had texts … private [messages on social media], emails — you name it. Often just from people who don't know me at all and want to say thank you for what I do and to tell me that my work means something to them," Kate says.

"That's extraordinarily powerful. I want those people to know how much strength I drew from that.

"When a small number of voices are very loud, you can feel very small, outnumbered, even crazy. These people reminded me I was sane, smart and had something different and important to contribute."

If you feel able to, publicly supporting the victim can also be a great option. Tell them that you value them and their work.

"I think especially people who have a degree of privilege have a big role to play here," Kate continues. For example, "I've always been very critical of the fact I didn't see many men talking up about the abuse women in sport receive online."

Start or reclaim a hashtag

Back in 2015 Mariam was targeted by an international online hate campaign via The Daily Stormer — which boasts its own "troll army" — after she protested against the messaging emblazoned on a singlet sold by Woolworths (it showed an Australian flag and said "If you don't love it, leave").

In response to the hate campaign, one of Mariam's friends started the viral hashtag #IstandwithMariam.

Mariam says this "felt like a giant digital hug at a time when I was otherwise alone and mentally fragile".

The Online Harassment Field Manual suggests that flooding a negative hashtag with positive messages can help reclaim it. And in fact, anti-bullying activist Monica Lewinsky recently launched a bot for the same purpose.

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Amplification

Trolls DO NOT like it when they see a target has a huge, positive support crew. They are banking on a scared, isolated victim. Therefore, if we bring a large and positive support crew to the target, we weaken the trolls.

Here's what you can do:

1. Give a clear call to action such as "PLEASE HELP" OR "PLEASE RETWEET" — all the evidence shows people are far more likely to do it if you ask directly! 2. Name the problem. 3. Tell people who want to talk back to trolls to be polite, calm and corrective. They hate it when you correct their grammar, for example. Or state where they've got the facts wrong.

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As an example, this tweet was seen by more than 21,000 people. Trolls, YOU LOSE.

Reporting to platforms

If you see abuse against someone, reporting it to the platform can take the onus off the victim. Trolls can use mass reporting to shut down the pages or suspend legitimate accounts of people they are targeting. But we can also use mass reporting of abuse to get cyberhate taken down faster.

You can also make a complaint to the eSafety office.

Want more info on being a great bystander (and taking care of your mental health)? Check out Gender Victoria's animated video and toolkit targeting people who are ready and willing to be active bystanders.

Worried about how to keep your kids safe online? Read this companion piece.

If you are in immediate danger, please report to police on triple zero.

Ginger Gorman is a journalist cyberhate expert and author of Troll Hunting.