American swimmer Ryan Lochte wanted to wear a custom-made red, white and blue grill on the podium after winning the 400 IM -- presumably to honor the ancient Olympians who also used to ice out with teeth jewelry. His plan hit a snag when a humorless IOC official informed him that wearing the grill would result in a failure to receive the most precious bling of all.

[ Photos: Ryan Lochte's Grill of Victory ]

Wayne Drehs of ESPN tweeted that Lochte said "he tried to wear his grill on the podium only to have an Olympics official tell him if he did so he wouldn't get his gold."

They were going to hold back Lochte's medal because of a grill? Even for the IOC, that's egregious. We wouldn't want anyone to have any fun after winning a gold medal at an Olympics, would we? Athletes like Ryan Lochte are what make the Olympics into the worldwide spectacle it is. If Lochte wants to dress up like the queen to accept the medal, let him. Some nameless official shouldn't stand in his way.

[ Related: Ryan Lochte steps out of Phelps's shadow, shreds 400 IM field ]

Speaking of the queen, a fake version of Her Majesty was featured parachuting into Olympic Stadium in a short Danny Boyle film aired during the Opening Ceremony. A few minutes after, Mr. Bean blew his nose while playing "Chariots of Fire." The IOC also put purple draping at Wimbledon and gave the green light to these two creepy mascots. But, sure, a small grill is too irreverent.

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