Let’s face it: For women, the orgasm gap is far from closed. And while you and your partner might both climax during a typical lovemaking session, chances are, his is as intense or more intense than yours. Why is everything always so much better for him? Well, with the techniques outlined below, not only will your own orgasm increase in intensity, but you’ll also rob your boyfriend of even his little bit of pleasure in this whole exchange. Here’s how:

Step 1: Consume Substances

Female Viagra? Why not? A little ecstasy? As long as you’re responsible! All the weed? All the weed. Share if you are so inclined, but also, feel free to hoard your favorite party pills. Tonight is a one-woman show starring, written and directed by you. He is the stage manager who’s thumbing through his cue sheets wondering what the fuck is happening right now.

Step 2: Demand Your Favorite Position

He’s getting his rocks off no matter what, right? So you might as well demand top, bottom, sideways, or whatever other position you like best. He might not be thrilled about it but he still gets to put his dick inside of you so he has no right to complain. And while you’re at it, go ahead and ask for whatever kinky shit you’re into this week. Tie him up, make him pull your hair, play German death metal…it’s all fair game because this is about you, getting off so hard that he’s literally scared for his life.

Step 3: Use Toys

Your dude only has ten fingers and one penis; he can’t be everywhere at once. So grab a butt plug, dildo, finger vibrator, or nipple clamps and stimulate yourself in every conceivable erogenous zone. You can have passionate, generous, mutually fantastic sex another time; tonight is about coming harder than you’ve ever come before, while your boyfriend watches in horror.

Step 4: Picture Someone Else

Oscar Isaac, Ryan Gosling, Danny Phantom, your boyfriend’s older brother…it’s not cheating if it’s just in your mind. Close your eyes and pretend you’re with the partner you’ve always dreamed of. This might make your boyfriend feel left out. You can deal with that after you’re done riding Hard Day’s Night-era George Harrison into the next dimension.

Remember, a man feels amazing when he ejaculates, but you deserve to feel even more amazing when you get yours. So amazing, in fact, that he’s like, “Damn, was that even fun for me?” Go for it!