Fighting Impeachment: Trump Has Had Barron Bury Him Up To The Neck In The White House Lawn So That He Cannot Be Removed From Office

Less than a day after House Speaker Nancy Pelosi made the bombshell announcement that she’d be opening an official impeachment inquiry, President Donald Trump is already making it abundantly clear that he will not go down without a fight. In a brazen attempt to maintain his grip on the presidency, Trump has had his son Barron bury him up to the neck in the White House lawn so that he cannot be removed from office.

Wow. Looks like Democrats have their work cut out for them!

Earlier today, after firing off a series of furious tweets maintaining his innocence in regard to his controversial phone call with the president of Ukraine, witnesses spotted Trump wander out onto the North Lawn of the White House along with a shovel-wielding Barron, who, at his father’s instruction, began diligently digging a large hole while Trump looked on and sipped a Diet Coke, occasionally poking the boy with a pen to make him dig faster. Once the hole was close to six feet deep, Trump stripped down to his underwear and crawled inside before ordering an exhausted Barron to fill it back up with him inside, at which point the sweat-soaked child then dutifully buried the president alive.

In the four hours since being buried up to his neck, Trump has been intermittently yelling “NO QUID PRO QUO” while Barron stoically sits next to him, swatting flies away from his head. It seems that Trump is prepared to stay buried as long as it takes to ward off the push for impeachment as he’s dictated a number of combative tweets to his son from underground, including, “I’d like to see the DELUSIONAL DEMS try to pull me out of this WONDERFUL HOLE—joke’s on them, I am TOO BIG!” and, “Great day for our country: I am STUCK IN THE LAWN and I am HERE TO STAY!!” With Barron there at his side spooning yogurt and cut-up hot dogs into his mouth to give him energy, it’s clear that Trump is readying himself for the political battle of a lifetime.

Yikes. This is definitely going to get ugly.

Even if the Democrats find a way to legally end Trump’s presidency, they are still going to face a long struggle in figuring out how to remove him from underneath six feet of densely packed soil. While the will to impeach is strong, Trump has the steadfast support of both his party and his son, and at this point there’s no telling how this monumental saga will play out.