One of the best emails I’ve had in a while read as follows: “Fancy doing the launch trip of the Kyushu Seven Stars: Japan’s first all-new high-tech luxury sleeper train, coasting through the lush landscape of the southern Japanese island of Kyushu?” Well, let me think for a moment. YES PLEASE!

We British love trains. We invented them, have written poems about them, and adore films featuring them. As long as it’s not the 0810 commuter into London Bridge, trains make us feel timelessly elegant. Such is the transformative power of travel: in reality I may be just another scruffy Brit carrying too many bags, but in my head I’m Marilyn Monroe in Some Like It Hot, mincing down the platform with a ukulele.

The Kyushu Seven Stars aims to rival luxury train journeys such as the Orient Express and the Ghan, and they’ve thrown everything at it. There’s hand-crafted woodwork and delicate art throughout. There are musicians, magicians and on-board staff who have spent a year in pre-launch training. The whole thing has cost three billion yen — around £20 million.

On the morning of the departure, Japanese national media scrummed to film the train’s first journey and the jammy foreigners on board. The Seven Stars is already fully booked for the next six months, and its sole cargo on this launch trip is a bunch of European journalists.

Koji Karaike, president of the Kyushu Railway Company, enthused over some of the train’s features: showers lined with aromatic hinoki cypress wood, ceramic sinks inspired by Satsuma porcelain, bamboo blinds and shoji, Japanese paper screens.

Apparently the train’s designer, Eiji Mitooka, drove his team mad by insisting on such details as irregular-sized windows to make each carriage different. Mr Mitooka’s face was among the crowds on the platform as the Seven Stars pulled out of the station, with the wistful look of someone sending their child off to university.

The train has 12 en-suite rooms and two luxury suites. There was a tense moment when occupancy of the suites was decided by a lottery , followed by shouts of “fix!” when yours truly won one and the correspondent from Metro scooped the other. We briefly became a reviled minority within the press pack, but it’s a sacrifice I was happy to make on behalf of Telegraph readers.

That happiness spilled right over into smugness as I began to write in my covetable suite. There I sat, resplendent in the green light of rice paddy fields, the volcanic landscape rolling past my numerous windows, on a bed surrounded by ornately carved Japanese maple, honeyish gold in the sun. Not bad at all.

Much later that night, however, when I could see neither the view nor the lustrous woodwork, I realised several things. The bed was quite narrow; there was a lot of noise coming from somewhere, and if I were paying £2,400 for one night in this luxury suite, I’d probably feel entitled to some sleep. (Not to mention anything else requiring bed capacity. Let’s just say it’s not the ideal honeymoon train.)

My colleagues who slept in the standard rooms reported mixed sleep records, and when I tested out their beds (in an innocent fashion, I should add) they had the same dimensions, softness and good linen as my posh one. Plus all of the showers are generous; ditto the views from all the windows. So if the added cost yields only extra floor space and a couple of chairs, I figure you’d be just as well paying the standard rate — a snip at £1,960.

If you have that kind of money to hand, Kyushu is an excellent place in which to spend it. It deserves Thailand-style levels of foreign tourism. It’s exotic enough to be exciting, yet functional and safe. And there’s a lot packed in to the train’s itinerary. The two different routes, the long and the short one, both include numerous outings from the train. One of these was the offer of a walk on the world’s largest volcanic caldera near Aso, Kyushu’s green and fertile heart.

I put on my trainers, eager for a break from the sedentary train lifestyle and the conditioned air. But the “walk” turned out to be a long drive, in an air-conditioned bus. In my view, you may as well stay at home and look at some volcanoes on the telly.

Which is precisely the problem with this kind of travel: there’s a lack of intimacy. It’s beautiful - but this is hermetically sealed beauty, at a distance. I wanted to jump into the sea, smell the forests and taste the street food, and the brief outings left me with a sense of loss on our return to piano-tinkling luxury. But maybe that’s just me.

Luckily, the longer of the two routes involves a night in a ryokan or traditional Japanese inn, and it is here that the real magic of Kyushu came alive for me. Our ryokan had curious stone paths winding around old wooden houses that had a humble, hobbit-land vibe. Inside traditional tatami mats covered the floor, and a yukata cotton robe lay folded by my bed.

Best of all I had my own private onsen. A hot natural spring constantly bubbling into a rough-hewn stone pool, with large steps to sit on. My limbs last saw the light of day in the bleachy waters of Kentish Town pool. The gratitude I felt sinking into this water could only be expressed by a loud groan.

The hillside sloped down to the green, fast-flowing waters of the Amorigawa river, which flows from Mount Kirishima. I include these names simply for their beauty. The area is lush, with thick bamboo, Dr Seuss-style trees, dragonflies and pomegranates. The staff guided us through mealtimes, smiling a lot. A materteral lady told me that people come here from the city in search of peace. The Japanese language offers many ways to say thank you, and with hospitality like this you will need every one of them.

I’ve neglected so far to describe the food in Kyushu . It merits an article of its own. It’s dainty, often decorated with maple twigs and flowers. Texture and appearance are as important as taste. Some of the fish and beef were among the best I’ve ever tasted, and I fell in love with my breakfast. Crispy mackerel and mild tofu, rice and an egg, downed with some miso and a black coffee. A challenger to the reign of the mighty Full English, you mark my words.

Of course, you will at some point be served something that’ll get photographed and uploaded to prove your daring to the folks back home. I confess that my Insta-boast was the crème brûlée stuffed with chicken liver pâté. But the myth of scary food in Japan is clichéd and unhelpful: everything is worth a go and most of it is gorgeous.

The Kyushu Seven Stars experience was wonderful for a madcap one-off, but Kyushu itself is even more wonderful. It is a generous island, thronging with nature in all its volcanic, bubbling, green glory. It deserves a haiku. But my editors would most likely decline an article consisting of 17 poised syllables, so instead I offer this, from Otagaki Rengetsu (1791-1875): “Reside in a living landscape / and it becomes yours.”

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Essentials

The Seven Stars in Kyushu cruise train will start operating from October 15.

A two-person suite costs from 155,000 yen (£980) per person for a two day/one night train cruise or from 391,000 yen (£2,475) per person for a four-day/three-night trip.

The most deluxe suite can accommodate three people and has a huge window that stretches across the back of the train: 227,000 (£1,435) yen per person for two days/one night or 566,000 yen (£3,580) per person for four days/three nights. The price covers all rail, bus and other transport during the specified itinerary as well as meals, sightseeing, entertainment, non-alcoholic drinks and accommodation. The longer trip includes one night in a luxurious Japanese ryokan (the Wasurenosato Gajoen).

The train is fully booked up to the end of March 2014 but there are places on journeys from April to June 2014.

www.cruisetrain-sevenstars.jp/en

Getting there

KLM Royal Dutch Airlines (klm.com) is the only airline offering direct flights between Europe and Fukuoka. The airline flies three times a week (Wednesdays, Fridays, Sundays) to Fukuoka via Amsterdam. Fares from Manchester and London from £539 and £553 return respectively, including taxes. Fukuoka is also connected to Tokyo and Osaka by the Shinkansen bullet train.

Further information

visitkyushu.org

seejapan.co.uk

On the train

There are two different circuits of the island of Kyushu, starting and ending in Fukuoka: a one-night 800km tour of northern Kyushu and a three-night 1,200km circuit of the whole island.

How much?

Based on two sharing, standard rooms on the one-night trip are £980 per person, and for the three-night trip £2,466 per person. Details on jrkyushu.co.jp/english

Buffet or banquet?

All meals on and off-board are included, plus soft drinks and minibar. Alcohol is not included. Menus include Japanese and French cuisine.

Sitting comfortably?

There’s plenty of daytime lounging space in the dining carriages. The suites have fully extended beds, a sofa and chairs. The standard rooms have armchairs that fold out into a full-length bed. Beds are made up during dinner, and are comfortably long, but narrow. The bathrooms are surprisingly generous.

What to read

David Mitchell’s The Thousand Autumns of Jacob de Zoet, set in 18th-century Nagasaki. The Classic Tradition of Haiku: An Anthology, edited by Faubion Bowers.

What to listen to

Nothing. The piped music is hard to avoid and there’s live music at dinner, so you may well want some peace in your room just to enjoy the somnolent rumble of the train.

When to go

The train runs all year round, but the locals are especially proud of the momiji: spectacular autumn maple leaf displays in November.

What to take

Make sure you pack some basic Japanese into your brain. You will want to say “thank you” and “delicious” very often.





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