A couple of old Wisconsin friends of the shebeen are back in the news again, thank the Lord, because it was hard around here without them.

Scott Walker, the goggle-eyed homunculus once hired by Koch Industries to manage their midwest subsidiary formerly known as the state of Wisconsin, has been particularly active both on the electric Twitter machine and in real life. He is running some operation to ensure that gerrymandering stays in place, and he's also the head of the Young Americans for Freedom, that hoary old relic of the John Birch Society's heyday. Meanwhile, back in America's Dairyland, his most conspicuous legacy continues to be the biggest bag of magic beans ever sold to an allegedly sentient politician. From the AP via the Chicago Tribune:

Wisconsin promised nearly $4 billion in state and local tax incentives to the Taiwan-based electronics giant if it invested $10 billion and created 13,000 jobs over 15 years to construct a 20-million-square-foot campus along a highway about halfway between Milwaukee and Chicago. The plant will produce Foxconn’s next generation of liquid crystal display technology that will be used to make display screens for cellphones, tablets and other devices. President Donald Trump lauded the deal as transformational for the state and national economy. Foxconn officials stated plans to construct centers in Milwaukee, Green Bay, Eau Claire, Racine and Madison.

They also promised Walker a unicorn pony. From Wisconsin Public Radio:

Not long after Foxconn Technology Group announced plans to build a massive manufacturing facility in southeast Wisconsin, the tech giant began making promises to share its model for economic development across the entire state. But 18 months after purchasing its first building in downtown Milwaukee, there is little evidence that what Foxconn calls its innovation centers are moving forward. In addition to Milwaukee, innovation centers have been announced in Green Bay, Eau Claire, Racine and Madison. Development directors in those cities say Foxconn now appears to be focused on its main manufacturing campus in Mount Pleasant.

The shovels are technically in for the Foxconn project. NurPhoto Getty Images

With the exception of Milwaukee, Foxconn has said each of these innovation centers could employ between 100 to 200 people working in high-skilled jobs. In Milwaukee, the company was touting more than 500 jobs. These jobs are eligible for state tax credits, which are administered by the Wisconsin Economic Development Corp. (WEDC). "WEDC receives a report from Foxconn on Dec. 31 each year which WEDC uses to determine whether the company qualifies for the jobs credits," Callender said. "We do not monitor the project more frequently than that."

Truth be told, there isn't much to monitor.

In July 2018, Foxconn announced it would purchase two properties in downtown Eau Claire. The company has since moved forward on buying one building, called Haymarket Landing, which is part of a public-private downtown redevelopment project. Over the summer, Foxconn identified a contractor and did about $2 million worth of work on the building, mainly HVAC, said Aaron White, Eau Claire’s economic development manager. "That’s been about the extent of it, it’s pretty minimal," White said. "We did get a visit from four Foxconn staffers and they reinforced their intent to move forward, but they gave no indication of a timeline."

White said the city was originally told there would be 140 to 150 high-tech and research and development jobs at the innovation center. He said he would love to see that happen, but the city hasn’t given Foxconn any incentives, so if it doesn’t move forward, Eau Claire is not out any money. "Obviously we would like this, but we’re not aggressively following up with them," White said. The story is similar in Green Bay, where Foxconn has been planning an innovation center along the Fox River since June 2018. Kevin Vonck, Green Bay’s development director, said early on Foxconn was meeting with contractors, but plans have been paused. The company is now planning to start interior construction in 2020, Vonck said.

Foxconn has been playing Wisconsin like a ten-cent yo-yo ever since Walker showed up at the company's doorstep with the state's economy in his mouth, like a beagle who's brought home a rabbit. Last February, the company floated a story that even the main campus was in doubt, announcing that plans had changed and that a smaller facility might be built. This, as MarketWatch informed us a couple of years ago, is Foxconn's general M.O.

But the details are important, given Gou’s history of making and breaking promises in numerous countries and regions over the years, including in the U.S. A pledge to invest $30 million in a factory in central Pennsylvania in 2013 was also greeted with much ballyhoo, as reported by the Washington Post....

Four years later, the factory has still not been built, to the disappointment of state officials. They are not alone. In 2014, Foxconn promised a $1 billion investment in Indonesia, which has still not happened, according to the Washington Post. A pledge to invest $5 billion in Vietnam in 2007 has also failed to materialize, nor has the company met its promises for India.

Thus does Scott Walker's time as governor live on as a tribute to one of the biggest suckers ever to be sworn into office.

Meanwhile, the zombie-eyed granny-starver is still at it. Mark Wilson Getty Images

Meanwhile, former Speaker Paul Ryan, the zombie-eyed granny starver from the state of Wisconsin, has a new job that comes richly accessorized with consultant-speak and market-based bullshit. From the AP via the Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel:

Former House Speaker Paul Ryan has launched a new nonprofit organization he says will be focused on fighting poverty, increasing economic opportunities and advancing evidence-based public policies. Ryan announced the launch of the American Idea Foundation on Monday. He moved more than $7 million from his congressional account into the nonprofit when he announced its formation earlier this year.

This always has been central to Ryan's scam—that he is the libertarian with a heart for the poor among us. (It may be true. His policies would've created so many of them.) The phrase "evidence-based" is pretty hilarious coming from a guy who once annually produced budgets concocted of spun nonsense and magic asterisks. (Even stalwart conservative columnist Jennifer Rubin thinks Ryan is full of beans on this one.) I will guarantee you that his "increased economic opportunities" will include further destroying public education, worrying about the deficit (as soon as there's another Democratic president), and a bunch of stuff about faith-based hoodoo and volunteerism. What the hell. It beats working for a living.

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Charles P. Pierce Charles P Pierce is the author of four books, most recently Idiot America, and has been a working journalist since 1976.

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