We Was Supposed To Rule The World, Baby

The Lament Of The Millennials

When I was in high school, all the authorities and pundits seemed to think that my generation was going to change the world. We would demand better working conditions, and a better life/work balance. We would fulfill the promise of all those who fought for an 8 hour work day, worker safety, and freedom from exploitation. More than that - we would lead truly meaningful lives, at work and at home. We would bring Paradise to Earth. And then everything went to shit.

I graduated university in ‘08, juuuuuuust as the Great Recession happened. I managed to weather the worst of the storm by hiding out in grad school, but most of my generation wasn’t so lucky. At the height of the recession, it was harder to get a job at McDonald’s than it was to get into Harvard.

Here’s the thing : for most of us, nothing has improved. In the old days, one person could comfortably support an entire family by working a blue collar job (probably at the local factory or plant), and they would be secure in the knowledge that their job would always be there. Those jobs are gone. We’ve all heard the phrase “jobless recovery”, and (and least up here in Canada) a lot of the jobs that have been created to replace the ones that were lost are low-paying, part-time, and completely insecure. “Benefits” are a mythical beast. The era of good jobs is over, and it isn’t coming back.

The sad truth is that our parents were the richest, best-off generation in the history of the world, and we will never have it that good. Instead of better working conditions, we’ve got unpaid internships, zero-hour contracts, and a terrifying level of unemployment. A shocking number of us can’t even afford to live independently, and have had to move back in with our parents. Our wages are stagnating while the cost of living increases. Don’t even get me started on real estate.

One fun side benefit of this is that we get to hear all sorts of wonderful financial advice from people who could pay their tuition up front by working a summer job, buy a house at less than a tenth the current price, and get a job just by walking up to the boss and having a firm handshake. It’s rather like a caveman telling you that instead of going to a restaurant, you should go kill a mammoth…except the caveman has a much better life than you. Because he’s been living off the corpse of the last mammoth.

As a generation, we have been criticized for being self-obsessed, for lacking professionalism, for spending money on frivolities. All of this is true, to an extent. And in our shoes, you’d be doing the exact same thing. For us, there is no path to success. We aren’t going to leave our part-time jobs for something with a desk and a suit. We’re here for life, so we might as well enjoy ourselves. Why not drink microbrew, or get that tattoo? Spending a little more on luxuries can make life bearable. Living like monks just to save money is incredibly foolish, especially since we’ll never be able to save up enough to make a real difference in our lives. Giving up beer won’t make it easier to buy a house. Giving up tattoos won’t help us find an apartment we can afford to live in without roommates. Giving up coffee won’t replace the pensions that we’ll never have. As far as work ethic goes, hell, why should we give any more than minimal effort when we get minimum wage? Don’t tell me that it’s the only way to get paid more - raises and internal promotions are almost as rare as good jobs.

The really neat part is that the same companies that won’t pay us a living wage are counting on us to keep buying their crap. The whole economy depends on us spending money that we will never have. It’s the tragedy of the commons on an international scale, and it can’t last.

Actually, there’s one aspect of this whole sad train-wreck that’s even better : almost all of the people who are responsible for this mess are Boomers. The same Boomers who absolutely need us to prop up the economy after they retire - to provide them healthcare, to buy their houses, to keep their stocks afloat. Of course, there are plenty of decent Boomers who are going to suffer - they assumed that the good times would last forever, and now they’re desperately struggling to keep their heads above water. It’s a shame, but there’s nothing we can do to help them - we can barely help ourselves.

A lot of intelligent people think that we’re moving to a new normal, to a world where a tiny minority have virtually all the money & power, and everyone else is condemned to life as a peasant or servant because the middle class has ceased to exist. I don’t buy it. I don’t think we’re just going to lie down and take it. We won’t let ourselves be turned into serfs without a fight. Occupy Wall Street was just us clearing our throat. Support for folks like Bernie Sanders and Jeremy Corbyn is the prelude. If things don’t get better real soon, shit is going down.

Is there any way to save the system? Sure! I’m a big fan of basic income. All the evidence suggests that it would massively improve the lives of almost everyone, while providing an incredible boost for the economy. Couple that with some restrictions on Wall Street and a few other regulations elsewhere, and you’ve solved most of the problems facing our society. If that doesn’t happen, though, then us Millennials are going to have to take steps - and scared, angry people with nothing to lose don’t always make the best decisions.

If you enjoyed this article, you might also be interested in my other work -

Serious Stuff : my thoughts on the White Poppy Campaign, a quick biographical sketch of a Canadian hero, thoughts on masculinity in the modern era, and The Sad, Strange Story of the Taliban’s Canadian Hostage.

Pop Culture : My Harry Potter apologia, an essay about Heinlein’s influence on Harry Potter, my reviews of Daredevil, Jessica Jones, Supergirl, The Magicians, and Star Wars : The Force Awakens, another essay about The Magicians, my essay about Star Trek, and my thoughts after reading every Discworld book

Buying Stuff : My guide to purchasing knives, & my article about ethical clothing

Advice : Some general advice about life, & my opinion about New Year’s Resolutions