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Devils winger Jordin Tootoo was devastated that he won't play in Winnipeg Tuesday night. (Saed Hindash | NJ Advance Media for NJ.com)

(Saed Hindash)

WINNIPEG, Manitoba — It is a three-hour flight from the west shore of Hudson Bay in northern Manitoba, but Jordin Tootoo's parents and sister came to Winnipeg hoping to see the Devils' winger play against the Jets Tuesday night at MTS Centre.

But it will not happen. Tootoo will be a healthy scratch.

“Obviously coming back here to Winnipeg I was hoping I was going to be in the lineup. This is like my second home,” Tootoo said after the team’s morning skate.

“I thought it would’ve been a nice touch. I don’t know how much longer I have to play in this league, and with all my family coming down here. Unfortunately they’re not going to see me play.”

His mother, father, sister, several uncles, boyhood buddies and other relatives made the trip. He had dinner Monday night with 20 people from back home and said "that's not even close" to the number of folks who will attend the game.

“I’m going to have to break the news to them in a few minutes,” Tootoo said. “This is like my hometown. I’m not going to argue. It’s obviously up to the coaches. Maybe two, three, for years ago I would’ve been upset."

Tootoo and Jacob Josefson will be healthy scratches at forward as Adam Henrique returns.

Peter Harrold and Jon Merrill (arm) will sit out on defense.

Tootoo said the cost of the tickets to fly to Winnipeg were over $2,000 a ticket. But that didn't hurt as much as not getting a chance to play.

"I'm not going to fight it anymore," he said. "I'm just going to enjoy it. But it's tough mentally."

He returns home as an author.

Tootoo co-authored an autobiography with Stephen Brunt called "All the Way: My Life On Ice" that tells of his battle with alcohol, NHL career and last four years of sobriety.

He said the reaction has been positive.

“It’s been pretty good. I think the feedback has been pretty amazing," Tootoo said. "It can really get into people’s minds the life that I’ve lived and the life that I’m living now. I think it really captures my life all in one big book.”

He called it therapeutic.

"For me personally it was to help me heal and to get that weight lifted off my shoulders," Tootoo said. "It wasn't a book to degrade any of my family or anyone I mention in the book. That's the way it was and this is the way it is now.



"My family has really taken it positively in regards to accepting that whatever went on and let's turn the page and let's help other families. Bt first let's make sure we help ourselves. Our relationship now is better than it's ever been. I'm very grateful for that."

Tootoo continued.

"At the end of the day what I've learned through this whole process is to be kind to everyone," he said. "You don't know what they're battling themselves. I'm sure a lot of people didn't see this part of my life. I've learned just to embrace each other with friendship and be open and honest.



"Living in the north, everyone knows everyone. Being quiet is the way people are. That's how depression worsens and obviously suicide rates are very high. This book is to show people that it's okay to talk and not hold everything in."

He's been told by many people that his book has helped them.

Tootoo downplayed the risk he took in writing the book.

"No. If I felt there was any risk, I wouldn't have done it," he said. "This was something I wanted to make sure people understood my story and I wasn't going to hold anything back. It was tough at times, but getting through those tough times has helped me heal and overcome adversity and learn to understand that life is all about ups and downs, ebbs and flows. Its how you react to them.

"Obviously I've been kicked to the curb, knocked down many times. But are you willing to get back up? For me, that's been my go-to. You can knock me down as much as you want. I'm going to get back up and live to fight another day."

Tootoo said he appreciates the opportunity the Devils gave him by taking a chance on him despite his background.

"In speaking with Lou (Lamoriello), he really was sincere and honest," Tootoo said. "That's what I want in return. Honesty and to be up front. Tell it how it is. I'm a man. I'm not going to sugar coat anything. Tell me how it is. If it's constructive criticism, I'll take it as a positive and move on.

"I really felt that coming to training camp and having a conversation with Lou that this would be a good thing for me if things worked out. Fortunately it has.

"I'm heathy. I'm pretty excited for the opportunity Lou gave me coming to New Jersey. For someone who has gone through a lot of crap the last two years it's kind of a reminder of how it's a privilege to play in the NHL. I've really embraced it.



"I've battled hard for the last couple of years asking myself why am I in or why am I out? Now I'm just enjoying it, trying to make the best of it."

Rich Chere may be reached at rchere@njadvancemedia.com. Follow him on Twitter @Ledger_NJDevils. Find NJ.com on Facebook.