Do any of these characteristics sound familiar?

If you or someone you know has 4 or more of these, we encourage seeking help to deal with the issues that have created these characteristics. Behaviors don't come out of a vacuum, there are reasons (

not excuses

) for this behavior, and it can be dealt with... often by you getting out of the situation.





* A Knight In Shining Armor, "I'll save you."



* Zeros in on a woman; he chooses her.



* Extremely possessive, always wanting to know where you are; who you're with.



* Obsessively jealous, even of your women friends.



* Has first class spending habits; always wanting more.



* Can't stand criticism; always on the defense.



* Exciting, fun, charismatic.



* A product of a dysfunctional family.



* Had a poor relationship with his mother. He had an abusive or passive father.



* Has a distorted view of reality.



* Uncomfortable with feelings; contemptuous of other's weaknesses.



* Has problems with authority figures.



* If you share a secret with him it may be used against you.



* Threats of withdrawal if you don't comply, "If you really loved me, you would…"



* Makes fun of you, calls you names and inflicts little digs; hostile humor.



* You feel awkward and incompetent around him; controlled.



* Embarrasses you in public, or flatters you then cuts you down when alone.



* Is nasty behind the wheel and feels that others' mistakes are directed toward him.



* Wants or demands undivided attention; you are to be available when he wants you.



* Cruelty may be directed toward animals.



* Has a dual personality (Jekyll/ Hyde).



* Has grandiose behavior; is cocky, controlling, self-centered.



* Is preoccupied with sex and is sexually controlling.



* Is competitive; must always win; his way or no way at all.



* As a child, he enjoyed playing with fire; more than curiosity.



* Was or is involved in a violent sport. (What is he doing now?).



*Comes on too strong and/or too fast, love bombing at first.



* Believes in the traditional stereo-type role modeling and roles.



* Is an habitual liar; he twists facts to make it look as if he were the victim.



* Has extreme mood swings (extreme high to low).



* Takes no responsibility for anything; blames others/ things/ circumstances for his behavior.



* Treats you rough at times; twisting your arm, grabbing, shoving.



* Is nice to others, but treats you badly; shows no respect.



* Steals, uses people, cheats them out of their money; always borrowing, never pays back.



* Professes to be religious then attacks YOUR religious beliefs or practices.



* Gives gifts then demands favors.



* Makes jokes and puts women down in front of you then ridicules you for being upset.



* Encourages pity from others; convinces you to feel sorry for him for all he's had to endure.



*Constantly cuts down your family and friends; isolates you. You must account for your time.



* Very impatient and when he gets angry will destroy property; usually yours.



*Overly sensitive and sulks when he doesn't get his way.



* Tells you everything to do; what to do, how to do it, when to do it; what to wear

(how many of these is your significant other?)



(While this is about the male abuser, your abuser may well be FEMALE!)

Labels: casual dishonesty, defensive, hatred, jealous, manipulation, martyr, misogyny, twisted thinking, women