Maybe all that up-close, visceral hack-’n’-slash has been the wrong approach all along. Maybe, if you really want to exterminate Jason Voorhees once and for all, the trick might be to simply send the cold, calculating, and depressingly formal arm of the government to surgically remove him.

Either that, or no one at the Maricopa County, Arizona Parks Department has any idea how these things turn out in the movies. In any event, Jason’s at the bottom of a local lake (no, not that lake), and the parks department — over the very sensible objections of area divers and horror fans alike — wants him gone.

According to a report in The Arizona Republic, parks officials have told a group of local divers that the county will soon remove the eerily lifelike Jason statue they’d placed at the bottom of Lake Pleasant, along with a handful of other unique items carefully curated to pique intrepid scuba enthusiasts’ interest.

The department found out about the Jason statue earlier this month thanks to social media (check out the awesome video below), and wasted no time in letting it be known that he’ll need to find another lake where he can take up his murderous residency.

Video of Dawna Taylor - 928.501.9204 #SAVEJASON STEELE SCUBA DIVING on YouTube

Lake Pleasant supervisor David Jordan told the Republic he understands the tongue-in-cheek aspect of sticking one of horror’s most iconic lake dwellers in the very place where you’d least want to encounter him. But, he explained, it’s kind of his job to make sure the natural environment remains clutter-free.

“There’s always a little bit of humor behind it but at the same time, we’re very much concerned about … trying to maintain clean facilities for people to enjoy,” he said, adding that unauthorized statuary (as well as other diver-placed items like fake skeletons, Christmas trees, and even a Volkswagen) will be treated as litter by the parks department.

The statue is reportedly the handiwork of diver Zachary Nagy, who takes credit for crafting and placing Jason’s likeness at the bottom of Lake Pleasant back in May (and what an outing that must have been.) The idea, he said, was to give divers a sort of target to focus on “to kind of practice their skills.”

Now parks employees will get to try their hand at achieving the seemingly impossible, even if it makes us a little sad to think they’ll probably succeed. We just hope they don’t paddle out there in a solitary canoe.