In sex education curricula across the U.S., transgender youth are often missing. Because of this, transgender young people can feel as though their sexual health and pleasure is not important, and be even less prepared than their cisgender classmates for navigating sex and sexuality — especially if they're experiencing gender dysphoria.

“Trans-inclusive sex-ed is important because people have the right to learn about all gender identities and expressions. By speaking about trans experiences openly, we are able to support and validate students who may identify as non-binary, trans, or questioning,” Molly Dillon, education and outreach coordinator for Planned Parenthood Great Plains told Teen Vogue.

Maintaining sexual health without any guidance can be especially difficult if a transgender person experiences gender dysphoria. Gender dysphoria encompasses the feelings of anxiety and discomfort that transgender people can experience regarding their sex assigned at birth. Not every transgender person experiences gender dysphoria, and for those who do, it can be more or less intense depending on the day.

"Gender dysphoria, the experience of distress when your assigned gender does not match your experience of yourself, can make the complexities of navigating sex, pleasure and connection exponentially more challenging," Angie Gunn, LCSW, CST, Talkspace therapist and sex therapy expert, told Teen Vogue. "When your body is incongruent with our identity, exploring it with curiosity and desire can be really tough."

As a non-binary and genderfluid person, I know just how daunting it can be to navigate gender dysphoria during sex. Whether it’s the ongoing process of learning how to communicate my own needs despite my dysphoria, have frank discussions about sexual health while experiencing dysphoria, or navigating a partner’s dysphoria, it’s taken years for me to understand how to both protect myself and others while still making sex fun. This process can take quite a while, Gunn explained, because sex may not be your first thought when you're coping with dysphoria.

"We learn by trying, doing, and being sexual beings, but folks with dysphoria are often fighting for space to just be," Gunn said. "Pleasure is not necessarily the top priority when faced with a fight for survival, creating a gender expression that feels right, or managing the mental health challenges associated with dysphoria."

Even with clear grasp of how my dysphoria manifests, it still takes a lot of communication with my partners to ensure that sex is safe and affirming for all involved. Gunn said that dysphoria can impact sex in a number of ways, including your own image of yourself as a sexual being, your understanding of what your wants and needs are, and the ways in which others treat you.

But don't get discouraged. You can and should enjoy sex even if you're experiencing gender dysphoria. So how can trans couples navigate sex when gender dysphoria is present? In addition to Gunn, I spoke with two sex educators, Molly Dillon and Sara Raines, about best practices for keeping intimacy safe and sexy when both partners experience dysphoria.

Understand that gender dysphoria is different for everyone

One of the most important things to know about gender dysphoria is that it can vary in intensity from person to person. Some people may feel very intense dysphoria about much of their body, while others may only feel a small amount of dysphoria or none at all.

Transgender people can feel dysphoric about any part of their bodies. For me, I feel dysphoric about the size of my breasts. During sex, I usually ask my partners to avoid acknowledging or touching my chest in any way.