What?? I know, I know, I had the same reaction… Is she serious?? But she is, and many others wonder the same thing. Is it blindness, ignorance, just following the false teaching about gays she has heard on Sunday morning for decades, genuine hate? Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. It depends on the person.

Sometimes I have great compassion, sometimes I get angry and frustrated. But you know, regardless of the reasons, there does come a time – when presented with truth, and the facts of the horrible treatment our gay brothers and sisters are suffering from – that we are all accountable for what we believe, and for the consequences of our words and our silence, our actions and inaction.

I write Dear Susan posts most every Friday. Sometimes they are poignant, sometimes thought-provoking, sometimes tender, sometimes funny… but hopefully always worth the read.

Dear Susan, Christ tells us to respond with love to ALL people because he loved us first. Lifestyle choice does not change that commandment. So many people automatically assume that Bible-believing Christians somehow or another hate the LGBTQ community and I do not understand – why is that? Jen

Dear Jen,

That’s a really good question. I can tell you why.

It’s because so many Christians say, “Hate the sin, Love the sinner,” quoting Gandhi in a piece where he was saying that’s impossible to do — to hate the sin, love the sinner. Invariable it reads, and in fact is, hating the sinner.

It’s because so many in the church have not paused from saying these words long enough to really get to know an LGBTQ person, and by know I mean listen to, not talk at. It’s because they continue to use phrases like “lifestyle choice” to describe something that is not experienced in any way as a choice, and is as varied in lifestyle as heterosexuals are varied in lifestyle. My lifestyle is different from countless other straight women, and the same is true for lesbian women. Or gay, or trans, or bisexuals.

It is because LGBTQ people are being told from pulpits that they are not welcome, they are being removed from leadership, they are being shunned from their churches. Some leaders tell parents to kick out their children if they won’t “change.” (I use quote marks because being gay isn’t something you stop doing like drinking. It’s something you would have to stop being like left-handed, which makes the requirement to change impossible and unloving.)

It’s because kids are being kicked out of their homes by so-called Christian parents, presumably in response to pastors who teach them to do so. This includes kids who have never even held hands with someone, much less anything else.

Personally, I do not think it’s much of a leap for the LGBTQ community to assume Bible-believing Christians “somehow or another” hate them. Rejection, condemnation, judgment, shame, expulsion and continually misunderstanding are all very practical ways of showing hate. It’s there for all to see.

I do believe that many of those who continue to mischaracterize LGBTQ people do so in ignorance, I really do, but it’s high-time time to learn. If they decline to learn, then they really don’t deserve a place in the serious conversation.

I hope you and everyone reading this post will become involved enough to learn what the issues are really about, and learn who the issues are really about.

Susan