Tough Love

Hate the sin, but love the sinner

My mom drilled that phrase in to my head so often that I don’t even know where it comes from directly, other than her conscience.



How about this one,

You must show your child tough love! Otherwise they will be spoiled like the other children out there!

You may have even heard that last part applied to spouses, alcoholics, addicts of any sort, and even the unemployed.

When we are faced with these two choices why do we always choose the latter? Is it because we don’t understand the former?

I think it is. I think that we don’t know how to love the sinner.



Let’s be clear here.

It is very possible that who we call a sinner may not be who God calls the sinner; it’s very likely that the sinner might have some love to share with us; it’s even possible that we may be the sinner that truly needs the love.

I think that the act of defining sin over takes us, twists us, and controls us so entirely, that we do not even realize, that which we hate is not the total of the person that acts in that hated manner.

It is easy for us to dwell on the failings of others.

It is so hard to move beyond those failings in others to love them personally and completely.



Real love is tough; not on others but on ourselves.

That is tough love.