The picture above appeared in a coupon book (“America’s Favorite Coupon Book”) distributed this month in Florida. The designer was paid $240 to create this ad for “CP Distributor”, an unfortunately-named computer repair business. It just so happens that one of the three people running the business served seven years in prison for sexually assaulting a child younger than 12. The designer, a female in her mid-40’s, says it’s just a coincidence that internet meme Pedobear shows up repeatedly in the ad and the letters “CP” (4chan abbreviation for “child porn”) are in an especially large font. The designer says she was searching for clip art to include in the ad, but she didn’t explain why she looked for a bear or why Pedobear would show up in a clip art collection for that matter. Mmm, maintaining plausible deniability while drawing national attention to a convicted child molester. *kisses fingertips* Magnifique.

In Amish man in Ohio has been charged with driving across the center line after a buggy race related accident in which no one was seriously injured. Jacob Raber was racing his horse and buggy against another Amish on their way to church when Raber crossed the center line and clipped and oncoming vehicle. Illegal street racing on the way to church? Clearly the onus is on the news media to point out how this could all have been avoided if violent video games were banned.

The bomb squad was called to a post office in northwestern Russia to inspect and possibly defuse a package making a suspicious noise. After an evacuation and a careful inspection, the bomb in question proved to be a vibrator which had accidentally turned on. Of course it’s Uproxx policy never to imply ownership in the event of a bomb. Always use the indefinite article: a bomb, never your bomb.

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Designer realizes employer was convicted of sexually assaulting a child younger than 12, takes internet meme-based revenge. (TheSmokingGun)

Headline of the day: “Amish Man Accused of Drag Racing in Buggy.” (AOLNews)

Russian bomb squad heroically defuses a sex toy. (Telegraph)

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Three chihuahuas born without front legs are looking for a good home in Massachusetts. So adorable, like mutant miniature kangaroos. (video at Geekologie)

At the Fukushima Daiichi nuclear plant, Japan raised the rating of the nuclear crisis from level 4 to level 5 (on a scale of 7) on the International Nuclear and Radiological Event Scale (INES). For comparison, Three Mile Island was also a 5, and Chernobyl was a 7. (France24)

Police in West Midlands, England, have raided the wrong house more than 40 times in 18 months — including two raids on Christmas Day — after confusing “Repton Road” with “Repton Grove”. The owner says it was funny at first, but now it’s annoying. Understatement of the year. (Metro)

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This is National Science and Engineering Week in the UK, so the Birmingham Science Society polled Britons on science literacy and found one out of five people believe light sabers exist. More than 40% believe hoverboards are real and 18% believe they can see gravity. Nearly half believe memory-erasing technology exists (in fairness, they drink a lot of pints over there, and that’s close enough). Meanwhile, 78% think invisibility cloaks are fictional when we actually have some now. (BSS via io9, picture via Catasters)

In a recent poll of Republican voters, 25% expressed concern that ACORN will “steal the election” for Obama next year, which would be quite an amazing feat since ACORN disbanded a full year ago. (Slate)

Hilo, Hawaii, has the distinction of being “The Drunkest City in America” with 9% of the population identifying as heavy drinkers. (Full top ten at MainStreet)

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