First, let's get the Barrydaviesian disclaimer out the way: nobody likes to see that.

Except, of course, that most of us do.

The good old Laws of the Game state that "while it is permissible for a player to demonstrate his joy when a goal has been scored, the celebration must not be excessive", a disciplinary tightrope often gleefully walked when scoring in front of thousands of opposition fans who have spent the last hour or so questioning your football talent, parenthood and extracurricular activities.