by Rika D Lively

There’s this picture of me sitting in an old photo album at my parent’s house. I am probably four and I’m standing on a patio chair outside with my brother and my dad. I’ve got a popsicle stick in my mouth with red juice stains surrounding my lips. We must have all finished swimming because the three of us are all shirtless, wearing swim-shorts.

Being shirtless isn’t a huge deal when you are a four year old girl. It’s probably not preferred, but it is not the worst. I remember my mom would frown at me as I refused the pink and purple swimsuits and demanded to wear swim-shorts just like dad. We were just in our own backyard and nothing was growing on my chest yet – but still, it wasn’t proper swimwear for a girl. However, with the picture as evidence, I had gotten what I wanted. I swam in those swim-shorts and was just like the boys. I stood proudly on the chair with a popsicle in my mouth, my thumbs up in the air. I was a girl, but I was a girl who could do what the boys could do too.

Now, I’m not at all arguing that we should change what is considered proper swimwear for women. That memory is just an example of a four year-old who knew who she was, and knew what she wanted. It’s also a memory of a four year-old who was beginning to experience a world with gender roles.

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Gender roles are weird when you really stop and think about them. The “parts” you’ve been given will determine what extracurricular activities you can participate in, how much you’ll be paid, and the likelihood of you getting sexually assaulted. That’s crazy! From the moment your physiological parts are called female or male or neither, most of your life is already determined for you.

In my own opinion and experience, most gender roles are arbitrary and are socially constructed. Girls aren’t biologically determined to love pink more than boys; and men aren’t inherently messier than women. Yet, stereotypes and our social expectations keep these myths alive. If you’re doubtful that gender roles are socially constructed, just think about how gender roles have evolved throughout culture and history.

Look at this picture of a small child: