I’d like to share something, one of my phobias, the number one trigger… throwing up. Emetophobia is the correct term. Believe me I know how irrational it is. I’ve been told by many people, “it happens to everyone,” “no one likes to throw up,” etc. etc. I GET IT, but guess what? My anxiety does not give a fuck, not one bit and I know I’m the only one who can change it, which I always hate hearing. This fear has haunted, yes HAUNTED me as far as I can remember. I can’t tell you how many times I would avoid anyone who was recently sick or just randomly threw up. It was like they had some sort of terrible plague. I would ask how many times they threw up, how long did it last, etc. etc. As I’ve grown that part has gotten SLIGHTLY better, but I swear if I have been near someone who was recently sick or got sick after I saw them, I shit you not I will freak out for the next week. When I say freak out I mean barely eat, isolate myself in my room, and many panic attacks. It is awful, stupid, annoying, and I keep letting the fear take over, every time. I know how unhealthy it is, but you have to understand I have had my whole life to create a normal bodily function that happens to get rid of toxins in your body, to a complete life-threatening, end of the world fear. I’m laughing at myself right now because I know how dumb it is! I swear its like a love/hate relationship. I love obsessing over the thought of anything related to throwing up, but hate the way it effects me. For anybody that may be concerned, I’ve mentioned this to many different doctors and have/am getting my share of help for it. Honestly I don’t know if I will ever get over this fear and it terrifies me because of how much it can affect my life, but I’m not going to go into the infinite “what if’s.” I hope one day I will be able to tolerate it. I know it will always be a fear, but maybe I can turn it into its true form: A way the body gets rid of toxins. What are your phobias? Don’t be afraid to share. If someone has some tips and tricks, like I’m asking how to create the perfect daily makeup routine, for me please share.

Your Anxious Friend

