“To wish you were someone else is to waste the person you are.” ~Sven Goran Erikkson

Let me fix you.

You really should try not to be so sensitive, Leah. The world is sometimes a difficult and upsetting place, but you shouldn’t let it affect you so much.

Let me fix you.

You know, you really ought to spend more time with people, Leah. It’s not good for you to be alone so much.

Let me fix you.

You know, you really shouldn’t make such quick, spur-of-the-moment decisions, Leah. It’s not good to do that in life and you’ll end up regretting them.

Let me fix you.

You’re so young, Leah. You should be out dancing and dating and having fun, not sitting home alone with another book.

Let me fix you.

You need to be more realistic, Leah. I know you have big dreams for your business and life, but it’s not secure. We all have to do work we don’t enjoy, it’s just the way things are.

Let me fix you.

Thank you for trying to fix me. Now let me tell you this…

Let me tell you…

My greatest strength is empathy. I feel others’ feelings as if they were my own. Their pain is my pain. Their joy is my joy. I cannot help but cry sometimes and I cannot hold the tears in, as you would like me to, nor wait for a more convenient moment.

Please don’t try to fix me. My sensitivity is my gift.

Let me tell you…

I am an introvert and a thinker. Introspection is in my blood. Long periods of time alone are a joy to me. Where others might feel lonely, I feel replenished.

I ponder, I reflect, and I muse over the thousands of dreams and ideas that are always in my head. I’m filtering, planning, connecting the dots and making sense of the world around me

Please don’t try to fix me. My thinking is my gift.

Let me tell you…

I am a woman of action and I do not like to wait. Once my mind is made up there is no turning back. Where others might be stuck in indecision, I have moved ten steps ahead. My life is in motion and I am creating in the real world the dreams I have in my head.

Please don’t try to fix me. My ability to act is my gift.

Let me tell you…

The future is beautiful to me. I see all that is possible and all that I want to create. In vivid colour and in high definition it appears to me. Whilst others see all that is wrong and the reasons why not, I see all that is right and all that could be.

Please don’t try to fix me. My dreaming is my gift.

You Are Not Broken

For the longest time, I thought I was broken. I thought I had to change myself. I thought I had to behave differently. I thought that my way of being wasn’t the way of being. I wished I were someone else.

At school my reports went like this:

“Leah is a wonderful student but she’s too quiet and needs to speak up more in class.”

In my nine-to-five office jobs it went like this:

“Try not to be so sensitive, Leah. It’s not good to let people see you cry at work.”

And when I handed in my notice, it went like this:

“You can’t go through life making rash decisions like this, Leah,”

And even now, almost three years into my journey of creating my dream life and business, it goes like this:

“We believe in you, Leah, we really do, but don’t you think it’s time to look for a more secure job?”

Everyone, everywhere, throughout my life has been ready with advice for me on how I should be.

Over the years, not knowing any better, I tried to bend myself to their suggestions.

I tried to be less sensitive. I tried to hold my tears in. I tried to be less impulsive and less impatient. I tried to spend more time around people. I tried to tame my dreams.

But when I tried to do all these things, all I felt was pain and it didn’t make anything in my life work better the way people told me it would.

Finally, thankfully, today, I see the truth.

There isn’t and never was anything to fix.

The very things that others told me were my faults turned out to be my greatest strengths and my most beautiful gifts.

When I finally saw and embraced them as such, I was able to begin creating a life that encapsulated everything that I am instead of constantly struggling and trying to be something that I was not.

It’s true for you too. There is nothing to fix.

If you find yourself surrounded by people telling you should or need to be different, I hope these three short notes will help you let go of what they’re telling you and to embrace instead what is truly special about you.

1. You are not broken, faulty, or defective.

There is no right or wrong way to be. Each and every one of us makes sense of the world differently. The way you are may be different to those around you, but that does not make your way of being wrong.

Instead of trying to bend yourself to their suggestions, take note of what the people around you say you should be like. There is a very good chance that they are pointing the way to your most special gifts and the things that make you uniquely you.

2. Use your unique gifts to create a life you love.

When you recognize, understand, and accept your personal strengths, you have the opportunity to consciously and thoughtfully craft a life that is in alignment with those strengths, instead of trying to squeeze yourself into a mould you won’t ever fit into.

I didn’t see it at the time, but the pain I experienced in my office jobs were clear signs that I wasn’t where I was meant to be. The roles I was in didn’t value my biggest strengths and work often felt like a battle against my very nature.

By seeing, understanding, and accepting my own personal strengths and gifts, I have been able to create a business and life that allows me to freely be all that I am. You can do the same.

3. Forgive those who try to fix you.

Remember that those who are telling you to be more like this or less like that—it’s not their fault. They, too, are filtering everything through their own set of unique gifts. Go easy on them; they’re just doing their best, like the rest of us.

Listen to what they have to say, take anything that feels useful but go ahead and drop the rest without a second thought.

Let me tell you this, my friend…

There is nothing to fix and nothing to change.

It is in those qualities that others might find difficult to accept that you will find your power.

It is in the acceptance of those qualities that you will have the opportunity to not only create a life that feels right for you, but to have the greatest positive impact on the people and world around you in this short and precious life.

You are a gift to the world. Just as you are.

Mosaic face image via Shutterstock

About Leah Cox Leah is a writer, poet and spiritual guide focusing on themes of awakening, emotional healing, sensitivity, creativity and following the call of your own heart. Discover more of her work on her website here or subscribe here for new writing every Tuesday.