The first person to hold the patent for what would become Jell-O was Peter Cooper (not pictured) in 1845. He stupidly sold it to Pearle B. Wait — a cough syrup manufacturer — in 1897. Wait then stupidly sold it in 1899 to his neighbor, Orator Frank Woodward (a high school dropout), who bought it for $450 (about $12,000 today). Then Woodward became so rich, it's stupid.

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