With William Shatner and Carrie Fisher recently dancing the relevancy tango by reigniting the age-old “Star Trek Vs. Star Wars” debate, it seemed resolution would be forever out of reach, not to mention full of increasingly icky sexual undercurrents. But now George Takei, long a blunt voice of reason, has boldly volunteered to get in between Fisher and Shatner as the peace-meat in their contrived-rivalry sandwich—which doesn’t help with the whole sexual undertones thing, we recognize, but at least Takei has provided some much-needed misdirection, encouraging both Fisher and Shatner to shut their “big wormholes” and come together in “star peace” so that we may all unite behind a common, “ominous threat to all science fiction”: Twilight. As Takei reminds us, Twilight is “really, really bad,” and we should all be focusing our energy toward spreading that message throughout the galaxy, and fighting the menace of “vampires that sparkle, and moan, and… go to high school.” No doubt several Twilight fans have already composed “Twilight Vs. Star Trek & Star Wars” video responses of their own, but we’re not going to look that up.