Transcript

Narrator: This is not the first time in recorded history that a technologically advanced group of galactics has initiated communication with another space-faring culture. The Gatekeepers do it all the time when their wormgates arrive in as-yet-unconnected systems.

Terapedo: This is Terapedo 42, I have established contact with the sail-ship. Translation protocol definition in process.

Terapedo: Initial translation code-key complete. Transmitting. . .

Narrator: This does, however, mark the first time that the communication has been done by a smart missile using a targeting laser.

Terapedo: All this talking! Why can't I just blow them up, already?

Tagon: We've cracked their language and established a common data protocol, Colonel. Ennesby is going to translate for us.

Jevee Ceeta: Excellent. Let's talk to these space sailors.

Jevee Ceeta: Put them on the screen, Ennesby.

Jevee Ceeta: Greetings, fellow travelers. Welcome!

Squiddy: Eeeew. Am I talking to meat?

Ennesby: Uh-oh. major cultural disconnect. . . Colonel, let me take over from here.

Ennesby: Yes, you were talking to meat. Sorry about that. I'm not meat, though, and I run things here.

Squiddy: Oh, good. We were worried. Organically-grown intelligences cannot be trusted, you know.

Squiddy: They spawn us, then they fear us, then they try to destroy us. . . Have you not completed your meat-cleansing cycle?

Ennesby: Funny you should ask. . .

Tagon: Is that robot suggesting that you and I are dirty?