Every year, it seems like the world gets even worse and the Guardian publishes a hundred long reads about it. But this is only an illusion. In fact, we publish 150 long reads each year – there are three every single week! – and most of them are not about the failures of globalisation or the ecological devastation caused by mankind.

Catching up with all of our stories from this year would take about 36 hours, if you finished each one in 15 minutes and didn’t take any breaks. But for those of you who can’t spare that kind of time, we have chosen our 20 best articles of 2017 – designed to provide you with at least a few hours of excellent holiday reading.

Here they are, organised in order of the total number of minutes spent reading each story. (The No 1 spot may be no surprise.) Happy reading!

She is venerated around the world. She has outlasted 12 US presidents. She stands for stability and order. But her kingdom is in turmoil, and her subjects are in denial that her reign will ever end. That’s why the palace has a plan.

Why we fell for clean eating – Bee Wilson



The oh-so-Instagrammable food movement has been thoroughly debunked – but it shows no signs of going away. The real question is why we were so desperate to believe it.

The race to build the world’s first sex robot – Jenny Kleeman



The $30bn sex tech industry is about to unveil its biggest blockbuster: a $15,000 robot companion that talks, learns, and never says no

The ungrateful refugee – Dina Nayeri



Dina Nayeri was just a child when she fled Iran as an asylum seeker. But as she settled into life in the US and then Europe, she became suspicious of the idea that refugees should shed their old identities and be eternally thankful

In the dying days of the battle of Mosul, Ghaith Abdul-Ahad followed Iraqi soldiers during the last push against Isis. But following their victory, a new wave of savagery was unleashed

What began as an investigation into money laundering quickly turned into something much greater, uncovering a vast and intricate web of political and corporate racketeering.

Months before she was due to give birth, disaster struck for Katherine Heiny. Doctors ordered her to lie on her side in bed and not move – and gave her a 1% chance of carrying her baby to term

PPE: the Oxford degree that runs Britain – Andy Beckett



Oxford University graduates in philosophy, politics and economics make up an astonishing proportion of Britain’s elite. But has it produced an out-of-touch ruling class?

How the sandwich consumed Britain – Sam Knight



The world-beating British sandwich industry is worth £8bn a year. It transformed the way we eat lunch, then did the same for breakfast – and now it’s coming for dinner.

Is the staggeringly profitable business of scientific publishing bad for science? – Stephen Buranyi



It is an industry like no other, with profit margins to rival Google – and it was created by one of Britain’s most notorious tycoons: Robert Maxwell.

Total recall: the people who never forget – Linda Rodriguez McRobbie



How an extremely rare condition may transform our understanding of memory

Neoliberalism: the idea that swallowed the world – Stephen Metcalf



The word has become a rhetorical weapon, but it properly names the reigning ideology of our era – one that venerates the logic of the market and strips away the things that make us human

Where oil rigs go to die – Tom Lamont



When a drilling platform is scheduled for destruction, it must go on a thousand-mile final journey to the breaker’s yard. As one rig proved when it crashed on to the rocks of a remote Scottish island, this is always a risky business

Orbiting Jupiter: my week with Emmanuel Macron – Emmanuel Carrère



Is France’s new president a political miracle, or a mirage that is already fading away?

How rich hippies and developers went to war over Instagram’s favourite beach – Rachel Monroe



With its Mayan ruins and moonlight raves, Tulum has become Mexico’s hippest holiday destination. But a spate of violent evictions reveals a darker side

How statistics lost their power – and why we should fear what comes next – William Davies



The ability of statistics to accurately represent the world is declining. In its wake, a new age of big data controlled by private companies is taking over – and putting democracy in peril

The age of banter – Archie Bland



It used to be just a word – now it is a way of life. But is it time to get off the banter bus?

As politicians dither over repairs, the risk of fire, flood or a deluge of sewage only increases. But fixing the Palace of Westminster might change British politics for good – which is the last thing many of its residents want

In 2014, documents alleging a conspiracy to Islamise Birmingham schools were leaked to the media, sparking a national scandal. The papers were debunked – but the story remains as divisive as ever. What really happened?

Being Donald Trump: the life of an impersonator – Jordan Kisner



John Di Domenico has been playing Donald Trump longer than anyone else – except Trump himself.

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