Personnel Warning The following document was created under the influence of a cognihazardous effect specializing in the alteration of perceived information. Information in this document is not to be discerned as truth. A revised document has been made available to personnel with clearance. It is advised to those assigned to this SCP item to read this document in order to acquire a better understanding of its cognihazardous components.

Knight #: SIR-2476 the Safe

SIR-2476. Dressed in its original robes and armour.

Special Chamber Requirements: SIR-2476 is kept in a humanoid containment tower at Site-17 castle. Questioning in interviews with SIR-2476 are to kept to a minimum, in order to prevent the activation of its primary enchantment. SIR-2476 is to be fed on a diet consisting of ham, canned pork and any type of jam as a condiment. SIR-2476 has been allowed to keep a potted shrubbery in its chamber of its own request.

Description: SIR-2476 is a human male in its early thirties, biologically identical to the late film actor Graham Arthur Chapman. SIR-2476 is prone to occasional episodes of hostility, where it will insult personnel in a French accent and insist they leave its presence, under the threat of further taunting. Apart from these episodes, SIR-2476 is generally cooperative with Foundation staff. The words "Mr. Monty Python And The Holy Grail, by Gamers Against Weed” are tattooed across SIR-2476’s left thigh.

SIR-2476 displays a number of enchantments relating to the 1975 film 'Monty Python and the Holy Grail' by the British comedy group, Monty Python. SIR-2476 is only capable of verbal communication through the use of words used in the manuscript of the film. SIR-2476 is able to recite the script of the film in its entirety, including dialogue, descriptions, actions and both beginning and ending credits. SIR-2476 is unable to speak any words outside of the script, despite multiple attempts.

When speaking for extended periods of time, SIR-2476 will begin dictating lines from the films script in-order, and proceed to recite the remainder in its entirety. SIR-2476 will begin reciting from a point in the script where the last word(s) it spoke was used. Anyone speaking with SIR-2476, or anyone else involved in the conversation at the time of the effects activation will join in with the recital. SIR-2476 and those affected will speak the dialogue of a varying set of characters through the entire recital. Subjects will take turns to speak the script's descriptions and actions. The beginning and ending credits will always be recited by SIR-2476. Those affected are unable to recall the events which took place while under SIR-2476’s effects.

Initial interview log

The following is a partial interview performed by Brother Belle shortly after the recovery of SIR-2476.

+Interview Log 2476-1 - Access Granted Brother Belle: Alright. Sir 2476, do tell me, what are your earliest memories? And what did you do to those peasants in ███████? SIR-2476: I remember walking around and knocking into someone. I said sorry. They were nice to me. We started to talk about funny things. Brother Belle: What did you discuss? SIR-2476: Monty Python. We both like it. Brother Belle: How did you know about the film beforehand? SIR-2476: I knew it when I appeared. Brother Belle: Alright. How did you make them do what they did? SIR-2476: It started after a little while. He brought up the spanking scene and I remembered it being fantastic. So we started saying it! Brother Belle: That was the trigger? SIR-2476: Yes, it was rather fun. Did I do something wrong? Brother Belle: No, no. You have nothing to worry about. SIR-2476: Oh ok, thank you. I was afraid I’d done something bad. Brother Belle: Do you enjoy comedy films? SIR-2476: Yes! I haven’t seen them but I know they are good! Could I watch some? Brother Belle: We’ll see. If you can help us out some more. I'm sure it can be arranged. SIR-2476: Thank you! I get to watch it properly! With all the dancing and singing. (SIR-2476 pauses for a few seconds) SIR-2476: And cheery music would be required to make it seem homey. Luckily, that is just what we get. Knights. Singing. Brother Belle: We’re Knights of the Round Table. We dance whene’er we’re able. SIR-2476: Knights leap on table. Brother Belle: We do routines and chorus scenes with footwork- At this point, the interview was immediately terminated and SIR-2476 was returned to its holding chamber. Both SIR-2476 and Brother Belle continued to recite the script of Monty Python and the Holy Grail in its entirety, despite being held in separate locations. They got better.

Document 2476-8745

The following document was recovered from the village of ███████ upon locating SIR-2476. It is reproduced below in its entirety.