Elder care, however, takes life-altering turns without warning: the crippling fall, the massive stroke. An older person’s need for assistance generally rises; given increased life spans, some workers will care for their parents longer and more intensively than they did their children.

Moreover, “the emotional toll is different,” said Kenneth Matos, senior research director at the Families and Work Institute.

“Someone raising a child is headed for happier events” and greater independence. “Someone caring for an elder is headed for sadder experiences.”

The federal Family and Medical Leave Act helps some working caregivers — it protects their jobs, for one thing — but the law has significant limitations. It covers only about 60 percent of the working population (exempting employers with fewer than 50 employees) and only those caring for a spouse, parent or child — not in-laws or grandparents. And of course, it’s unpaid.

So a few states that already provide temporary disability insurance for workers have begun adding benefits for those who need time off for family caregiving. California went first in 2004, followed by New Jersey in 2009 and Rhode Island last year.

The lengths of leave and levels of income replacement vary, but all three states cover caregiving for both babies and older family members. The laws in California and Rhode Island — and, pending legislation, in New York State — define “family” fairly broadly, including siblings, in-laws and grandparents. New Jersey applies a narrower definition.

In New York, the bill that passed the State Assembly in March calls for up to 12 weeks of paid leave each year for full- or part-time workers (in workplaces of any size) to care for a newborn or newly adopted child or a family member with a “serious health condition.” While on leave, workers would receive two-thirds of their average weekly wage, up to half the statewide average, which last year was $1,266. Small paycheck deductions — less than $1 a week — would fund the new benefit.