In a classic game of total one-upmanship, Ascendo Immersive Audio brought its SMSG 32 Subwoofer to CEDIA, with a immense 32-inch driver that basically called out all the other “large” subs at the show and told them to make it a sandwich. And the crazy thing? This is only thebiggest sub the company manufacturers!

The Ascendo representative said the SMSG 32 is meant for large home and commercial installs where deep infrasonic bass is needed across a lot of real estate. How deep? How is a continuous 120 dB output down to 7 Hz?! That turns your bathtub into a Jurassic Park level impact tremor, and can cause organs to shift around inside your body. The sub is driven by an active 6,000-watt amplifier and has a 6.3-inch voice coil with an absolutely insane 3.5-inches of linear excursion, which the company claims is a cinema sub record.

This speaker is actually not meant to be the primary sub in a theater system, but rather crossed over at around 35 Hz and handling only the ultra-deep low frequencies that a traditional sub struggles with producing serious SPLs. For truly large rooms, Ascendo also manufacturers the SMSG in a 50- and 80-inch version! I couldn’t confirm, but I’m guessing the 80-incher could be used as a group lithotripsy device, destroying kidney stones on the ultrasonic level across a broad seating position.

One can only imagine the kind of brown-note inducing, chest crushing, soul withering bass this bad boy is capable of, but, sadly, it wasn’t on demonstration at the show. However, you can experience this viscous bass monster in the comfort of your own theater now for around $22,000. Or, you know, man-up and get the 80-inch version. Then, please, give me a call.