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LOCAL man Garreth Whellan doesn’t need any help getting home, he’s just out for a few drinks, you don’t need to ring anyone, he’s grand, just leave him be and go on about your business, sure he’s only enjoying himself, WWN can report.

Whellan, 26, will go home when he’s ready, would you ever fuck off and stop annoying him, you mind your business and he’ll mind his, no you don’t need to ring anyone to come get him, he’s not bothering anyone, now are you going to serve him another drink or does he have to go elsewhere?

Local man, Whellan, 26, just wants you to look the other way, don’t be looking over here at him, you look over there and mind your fucking business, he means it now, quit looking at him like that, alright, listen, get your fucking hands off him, he’s warning you now, don’t fucking start, what’s your fucking problem anyways.

“Get your hands off me”, said Whellan, grand, not a bother on him.

“Get… get the… get your fuckin hands off me. Go away the fuck, I’m fuckin’ warning you lad. Don’t start. I’m grand. I’ve only had a few drinks, I’m grand. You just… fucking… you, take your fuckin’ hands off me now, I’m telling you this now, take your fuckin’ hands off me”.

Local Garreth, 26, wants to know if you fuckin’ want yours too, if not then get the fuck.