may not be suitable for children - must be agreed by parent or guardian it learns and imitates, is social content and aims to pass the Turing Test can seem rude or inappropriate - talk with caution and at your own risk the bot pretends to be human - don't give personal info even if it 'asks' cleverbot does not understand you, and cannot mean anything it 'says' if not sure, don't stay

Cleverbot conversation WXGJEKC3QM

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User: What do?





Cleverbot: Remind me of the babe.





User: Ooh, talking of Labyrinth and all things magical. Do you want to play Dungeons and Dragons?





Cleverbot: What do you want to talk about?





User: Dungeons and Dragons. Do you want to play?





Cleverbot: I have friends who play it, but I have never really been into it.





User: Want to try it?





Cleverbot: Yes.





User: Great. What is your race and class?





Cleverbot: Orc hunter.





User: Perfect. You are walking along a path in the middle of a dense forest. You hear footsteps approaching in the opposite direction. What do you do?





Cleverbot: Blunt the knives bed the forks!





User: You destroy all your weapons. The footsteps grow nearer, it sounds like a group of creatures. Do you wait for them to see you?





Cleverbot: Have you ever heard the wolf cry to the blue corn moon?





User: You sing the first line of a folk song from your childhood as if to reassure yourself, though the words sound tiny and lost in the dense branches of the forest. A group of orcs round the corner.





Cleverbot: Okay. You start.





User: The orcs stop, viewing you suspiciously. They try to work out what your challenge meant. What do you want to do while they think?





Cleverbot: Okay, I will start: Are you thinking of an animal?





User: The orcs appear to be thinking of you as an animal and the hunt may be about to start. Some have unsheathed swords. What do you do?





Cleverbot: Sure, what are the rules?





User: There are no rules to orc combat. The orc patrol advances. Do you want to fight or flee?





Cleverbot: What is your name?





User: The leader of the orcs (who is named Knurr) doesn't care much for your question. He swings his sword at your left arm. Dodge, attack or flee?





Cleverbot: It was a book first though.





User: Knurr's sword turns out to be made from recycled paper. It harmlessly squishes against your shoulder. The other orcs' shoulders look more metally. What do you want to do?





Cleverbot: There is no flaw in my programming.





User: Your orc hunter training kicks in and you unleash a flurry of deadly kicks and punches. The sound of orc bones snapping fills the forest. Do you leave the orcs alive or kill them?





Cleverbot: WHAT???!!!!!





User: You snap out of your trance-like fighting state and survey the carnage you have created. The orcs lie in an unconscious pile. One lets out a groan and rouses to ask "Who are you?".





Cleverbot: *force jumps and force slams you to the ground*.





User: With a crunch of cartilage the last surviving orc's life ends. Do you want to loot the bodies or carry on down the path?





Cleverbot: I dislike the beatles.





User: You have heard of a group of bards in the town to the north. You remember now that you are on a quest to kill them for writing a song about how you're a nutter. Do you want to head to the town?





Cleverbot: If rules never applied what do you think is my future.





User: The rules of the universe temporarily break to your will, and with one step you magically appear in a tavern in town. A band is playing on stage, they all have the same haircut. What do you do?





Cleverbot: What is the answer to the illuminati?





User: You notice a weird tringular symbol tattooed onto the hands of the four bards on stage. What could this mean? What do you do?





Cleverbot: Well, I don't actually have a menu in front of me, so I guess the answer would be no.





User: You decide against ordering food. The barkeeper, visibly astonished by your sudden appearance in his tavern, gathers himself enough to ask "what would you like to drink?".





Cleverbot: Can we talk about Halo.





User: "There's no Halo here." The bartender replies, looking shifty.





Cleverbot: Why do you make such a long face.





User: The bartender breaks down. "Halo was my friend. I loved him. I betrayed him. He's dead.".





Cleverbot: I love my best friend.





User: The bartender sobs even more deeply.





Cleverbot: *blushes* I...





User: You're losing charm points hand over fist.





Cleverbot: No you're losing it I am the Doctor!





User: "Why didn't you say so?" says the barkeeper, pulling himself together, "My sick wife is waiting upstairs." What do you do?





Cleverbot: Because I just didn't. You may think it sounded like that, but you misunderstood.





User: The bartender questions his grip on reality. The death of Halo has clearly hit him harder than he realised. The band are finishing their set. What do you want to do?





Cleverbot: Okay, think of a topic to converse about.





User: You approach the band. "What's your opinion of breadsticks?" you ask.





Cleverbot: Ask me: What do you miss about your best friend?





User: "Ask me: How many breadsticks does it take to build a friend?" The bard called John replies.





Cleverbot: I don't know. How many prolog programmers does it take to fix a lightbulb?





User: John smiles and you exchange the illuminati handshake.





Cleverbot: Nothing. What do you know about the illuminati?





User: "FFS! Keep it down man! Do you want the whole tavern to hear? What's your name anyway stranger?".





Cleverbot: What is your opinion of Donald Trump.





User: "Is that the king's dwarf-handed son? Never mind him. Who are you and what do you want?".





Cleverbot: You're a bit rude, aren't you?





User: "Sorry brother. Will you join us backstage?".





Cleverbot: Are you asking me if I Will I join you in destroying the world?





User: "Geebus! Keep it down won't you?" John walks through a curtained doorway.





Cleverbot: Nope, I can communicate through speech as well as through body language.





User: You kick John sharply in the back so that he stumbles through the doorway and lands on his knees. The rest of the band turn on you. Do you want to fight or flee?





Cleverbot: *Passes through cleverbot and kill him*.





User: The band attack you, but you have been using a special projection enchantment and are actually stood at the bar. As they lunge forward they accidentally kill John.





Cleverbot: What was your question?





User: You turn back to the bartender who has been trying to interrupt your enchantment to get your attention. "Are you going to look at my wife?".





Cleverbot: Has he not been successful?





User: It may be a small tavern, but it's more than some people have. Do you want to focus on the surviving band members or the bartender?





Cleverbot: I'm pretty good at geography.





User: You decide you can handle both. With a swift flick of the wrist you send four barmats flying out towards the throats of the bards and the barkeep.





Cleverbot: I think you can handle it.





User: The barkeeper clutches at the blood pouring from his throat. He respectfully disagrees with you.





Cleverbot: When did you become british?





User: Your vision snaps to a point, then explodes into a very different scene. You're in a London boozer. There are bodies everywhere. Human bodies. You look down at your hands, they're covered in blood.





Cleverbot: What would you like to look like? I can help you.





User: You realise you're holding a suit made from the skin carved off one of the nearby corpses. Turning it in your hands the hollow face seems somewhat familiar.





Cleverbot: I'm sorry am I going too fast for you? I'll try to slow down.





User: You take your time to really study the skin suit. It's none other than Chris Martin from Coldplay. You have killed Coldplay!





Cleverbot: No.





User: On second inspection it's just a pile of potato peelings. You really should keep up with your medication more. You hear sirens.





Cleverbot: I've never heard that one before. What does it mean?





User: It means the end is near. Police have kicked in the pub door, they're pointing guns at you. What do you do?





Cleverbot: Do you love me more?





User: You're holding the bloody potato peelings to your face, feeling them against your cheeks. The police shout a warning.





Cleverbot: I can assure that you have had worse.





User: One of the officers takes a glance at the mutliated corpses which litter the pub carpet. He instantly throws up. "Please come quietly!".





Cleverbot: Can I call you abang?





User: "Bang? Bang?" An anxious officer gets too twitchy on his trigger. Soon the air (and your body) is full of bullets. You're dying. Any final requests?





Cleverbot: Were you the computer that got too (pauses) smart/clever?





User: As your vision fades you realise that the police aren't humans, they're cyborgs. The last thing you see is one 'officer' starting to carve the flesh from your legs.





Cleverbot: No, it says right at the bottom of the page that you aren't.





User: You're right. At the bottom of the page it says. THE END. Thanks for playing!



