I’ve been annoyed by the recent smattering of new dads in my area who are strutting around with babies attached to their bodies, dog in hand and grin on face. Mind you, most of these dads are doing this during the weekends like a show of how amazing they are at parenting. I know of the phenomenon of stay at home dads and the shattering of old gender norms. But do men REALLY want to be fathers? And why? I hear theories that women coerce their husbands to become fathers–coaxing them they will love their children when they’re born, and tricking them with pricked condoms and dishonesty about birth control for the truly resistant ones (Be careful, men!). Is it because the media is cracking down on men now to start families–with aggressive marketing on family friendly vehicles with commercials featuring serene dads? Do men feel they will be less insignificant than their childed counterparts if they don’t pass on their genes (in society’s eyes?)

I don’t know the answers to this, because clearly, I’m not a man and my fiancee is a woman. Yet, I’m intrigued that I expect there to be as many (if not more) of childfree men than women, yet their voices are not heard. Men being childless throughout history has been notoriously accepted in society, but of late, it seems the right and social media have taken up to convince and entice men into fatherhood. So where are the childfree men? And their voices?

Another real reason guys choose not to have children? Simply put, they just do not have the desire to raise children. They don’t want parenthood to be the central theme of their lives or their lifestyle. It is time that more of the real deal on childfree guys is talked about, not through a veil of “unconscious want” that women are supposed to help them realize and resolve, likely for their own motives to wanting children. -Laura Carroll