Three hours is an awfully long time to fill, but on Wednesday’s Morning Joe, show regular Donnie Deutsch took a wrong turn down into Tangent Holler when he wondered, out loud, whether Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney “colors” his hair. Deutsch’s fellow Joeers dismissed the subject out of hand, but like any bloodhound for truth, he circled back a few minutes later, because “if the average American thought a man was coloring his hair would lose trust in him.”

Deutsch puts me in the unusual position of having to defend the former Massachusetts Governor, but Mitt Romney’s hair is one of the few things you can trust about him.

In Donnie’s defense, he did preface his point by saying he was about to “switch gears crazily here,” and did he ever. “As you were playing the images of Mitt Romney, I don’t know if anybody’s ever asked this, I’m not being glib here, he has the white side burns. Does he color his hair?”

Just as every Morning Joe viewer in the world was thinking, “Are you serious?” Deutsch continued, “I’m being serious. If he does, can we trust the guy? I’m sorry. Why hasn’t anyone asked that question?”

Host Joe Scarborough dismissed the question, amid bewildered laughter from the rest of the pane. “I have people ask me every day,” he said “why do you have Donnie come on the air?”

“Do you want a President of the United States who colors his hair?” Deutsch continued.

“Let’s go to Mike Barnicle,” Scarborough said, “Ronald Reagan colored his hair for 80 years.”

“Is that a yes?” Deutsch asked.

As inane as Donnie Deutsch’s focus on Mitt Romney’s hair was, though, it at least had the virtue of being self-evident in its lack of substance. Joe Scarborough and company switched subjects to heap praise on Romney’s time as Massachusetts Governor, which consisted of passing a progressive piece of health care legislation that was mostly funded by the federal government, which he now promises to repeal at a national level, and jacking up revenues by simply collecting his taxes in the form of “fees.” That’s not “bipartisanship,” it’s putting a bad paint job on rolling over. Come to think of it, Donnie Deutsch was kinda spot-on, if unintentionally.

He also wasn’t done, at the end of the segment, Deutsch added, “I think, if the average American thought a man was coloring his hair, would lose trust in him. I’m serious.”

Me too, and I am pretty sure Mitt Romney doesn’t die his hair. But I bet his tits are fake.

Here’s the clip, from Morning Joe:

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