A check, an overdraft from 20 years ago, stalled my attempt to get Argentine residency.

Seriously.

I am an American and have been living in Buenos Aires for the last four years. December 1, Ale, my gorgeous Argentine wife, and I will go out to dinner to celebrate the anniversary of my arrival.

We won't be able to celebrate my new Argentine residency as I had hoped. A low-level immigration flunkie who was more interested in his next sip of mate blocked my path.

Jerry’s email is jandrewnelson2@gmail.com

But I'm getting ahead of myself.

In January 2015, Ale and I decided I would pursue Argentine residency. It's a great country. I like it here. There's much that evokes 1960s America. That nostalgia is a good thing.

We started down the paperwork pathway that would lead to residency.

Letters and forms went out.

Send a Tweet to Argentina’s President — @mauriciomacri

To America's FBI for a background check.

To an American state senator for my birth certificate

To every Tom, Dick and Harry I know who could provide a reference letter

Get the picture?

Almost two years — and 81 pages of documentation — later, Ale and I, with a friend, go to Immigration in Buenos Aires to present my documentation and obtain residency.

After a taxi ride which cost $155 (ARS) and an hour wait in line, it was finally my turn.

Sliding my paperwork through the little slot in the plastic window, the clerk fumbled through the stack of documents until he found my FBI background check.

Glancing through the paperized heap of dead trees, he spotted a bad check I had signed in Georgia (USA) in 1997. At the bottom of the sheet was distinctly identified the $120 fine I paid.

He didn't care about that. All he knew was he had a "hardened gangster" standing in front of him. He pointed us to another office, downtown, where I have to go Monday.

For the past two-years, Ale and I have painstakingly gathered the expected documents:

American birth certificate

Passport

Proof of Argentine residency

Argentine background check

American marriage certificate

Argentine marriage certificate

....and more. Over 80-pages worth.

Just about the only document that Argentina didn't demand was a daily poop report stating how many times a day I took a dump and what color, size and shape it was.

Maybe My "Crime" Wasn't Big Enough

Kurt Sonnenfeld, an American from Colorado, killed his wife Nancy and fled to Buenos Aires.

American law enforcement has been trying to get Sonnenfeld extradited since. The Argentine government has refused.

On January 2, 2015, The Argentine Supreme Court ruled that it would allow Sonnenfeld to be extradited and approved the extradition on September 16, 2015.

On November 17, 2015, it was announced that the then-President, Cristina Kirchner, had blocked the extradition — citing human rights violations.

The kicker in all of this?

I was told Sonnenfeld got his Argentine residency request approved.

Epilogue

Argentina's President, Mauricio Macri, has a Twitter account. It is @mauriciomacri

Send him a Tweet asking for his support in getting my residency application moving.

I am an American freelance writer and ghostwriter now living the expat life in Argentina. Never far from my coffee and Marlboros, I am always interested in discussing future work opportunities. Email me at jandrewnelson2@gmail.com and join the million-or-so who follow my life and work on Twitter @ Journey_America.

Thanks for being part of my wild and wonderful journey called life.