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--> A midday take on what's happening in politics and how to have a sense of humor about it.*

*Ha. Haha. Hahah. Sniff. Haha. Sniff. Ha--breaks down crying hysterically.

The Hill’s 12:30 Report: Sights and sounds from Houston | Debate takeaways | Warren looked like 2020 front-runner | Trump rips ‘sad’ impeachment effort | Congress to ignore Trump’s wall request in government funding | Ted Cruz Rafael (Ted) Edward CruzCrenshaw looms large as Democrats look to flip Texas House seat SCOTUS confirmation in the last month of a close election? Ugly The Hill's Morning Report - Sponsored by Facebook - Trump previews SCOTUS nominee as 'totally brilliant' MORE hopes to ‘run again’ for president | Full moon on Friday the 13th | Krispy Kreme’s doughnut deal today

TALK OF THE MORNING



Three debates down, only nine *nervous laugh* to go…:

FIVE TAKEAWAYS FROM THE DEBATE:





*Most importantly

Context and details for each: http://bit.ly/30hq8cO





It’s Friday ... the 13th. Oh, and we will have a full moon tonight ... just saying. I’m Cate Martel with a quick recap of the morning and what’s coming up. Send comments, story ideas and events for our radar to cmartel@thehill.com — and follow along on Twitter @CateMartel and Facebook.

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SIGHTS AND SOUNDS:





Booker’s best joke of the night: “Booker, asked if the country should go vegan: ‘First of all I want to say: no. I want to translate that into Spanish: No.’” http://bit.ly/30gzlSC

Whooops: “Hello from a Bookuchar #DemDebate watch party in Des Moines. It seems both campaigns planned for the same bar” (Via Iowa Starting Line’s Pat Rynard) Photo: http://bit.ly/2lTVDuR

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The best part of the night: Right after the debate, Andrew Yang Andrew YangBiden's latest small business outreach is just ... awful Doctor who allegedly assaulted Evelyn Yang arrested on federal charges The Hill's Campaign Report: Biden weighs in on police shootings | Who's moderating the debates | Trump trails in post-convention polls MORE came close to the camera and blew a kiss. Photo: http://bit.ly/2I5hyYs

The candidate opening looks like ’90s sitcom opening credits: http://bit.ly/2kIaW9X

Riiiiight as the debate started: President Trump Donald John TrumpFederal prosecutor speaks out, says Barr 'has brought shame' on Justice Dept. Former Pence aide: White House staffers discussed Trump refusing to leave office Progressive group buys domain name of Trump's No. 1 Supreme Court pick MORE took the stage at House Republicans’ retreat in Baltimore. Republicans chanted, "four more years! Four more years!" http://bit.ly/2lNyKJI

Photo of the spin room before the chaos: http://bit.ly/2kzQt7l

Biden did it for the Gram: http://bit.ly/2kkkjfU

Maybe I was just delirious by the third hour, but I laughed out loud at this: “The Daily Show” tweeted,

“BETO: We need to stop gun violence

BOOKER: I can unite the country

YANG: Guess what, America? You just got in THE CASH CAB.” http://bit.ly/30c75k7

Check out these candidate animations: The Huffington Post’s Peter Finocchiaro tweeted, “I’M UNCOMFORTABLE.” http://bit.ly/2kg2gHA

Photo of a protester getting escorted out: Don’t forget, the protesters started making noise when Biden mentioned his wife and daughter. http://bit.ly/2lTXpMx

Omg, 30 is not old!: “OVERHEARD as reporters and embeds wait in spin room just now: ‘He’s old now. He’s about to turn 30. So he can’t handle it anymore.’” http://bit.ly/2I3tYQI

I thought this was pretty funny: Pete Buttigieg Pete ButtigiegBillionaire who donated to Trump in 2016 donates to Biden The Hill's Morning Report - Sponsored by Facebook - GOP closes ranks to fill SCOTUS vacancy by November Buttigieg stands in as Pence for Harris's debate practice MORE with a completely straight face: "You know, I served under Gen. Dunford. Way under Gen. Dunford, in Afghanistan.” http://bit.ly/1sohLG0





THE GIST FOR EACH CANDIDATE:





Joe Biden: “Nothing happened on Thursday night to fundamentally change the nature of the race, making it a positive night for Biden.”

Sen. Bernie Sanders Bernie SandersSirota reacts to report of harassment, doxing by Harris supporters Republicans not immune to the malady that hobbled Democrats The Hill's Morning Report - Sponsored by Facebook - Republicans lawmakers rebuke Trump on election MORE (I-Vt.): “Sanders was on-brand as always ... [but] appeared to be hoarse or battling a cold, and it was a struggle for him at times to get his thoughts out with the usual emphasis.”

Sen. Elizabeth Warren (D-Mass.): “Warren was steady on Thursday night, sticking to the script and refusing to be drawn into a confrontation with Biden.”

Sen. Kamala Harris Kamala HarrisTexas Democratic official urges Biden to visit state: 'I thought he had his own plane' The Hill's Campaign Report: Biden on Trump: 'He'll leave' l GOP laywers brush off Trump's election remarks l Obama's endorsements A game theorist's advice to President Trump on filling the Supreme Court seat MORE (D-Calif.): “All in all it was a strong night for Harris, who was more at ease in a debate where she didn’t seem pressured to be leading the attacks against Biden.”

South Bend, Ind., Mayor Pete Buttigieg: “Buttigieg was steady, but he was one of several candidates who seemed to be operating in the background all night.”

Tech entrepreneur Andrew Yang: “Yang is not a very polished public speaker, creating a negative contrast between himself and the more experienced debaters on stage next to him. Instead, the tech entrepreneur has gotten this far by pluck, charm and media savvy.”

Former Rep. Beto O’Rourke (D-Texas): “O’Rourke might have had one of the best nights of anyone on stage ... [but] it may end up being too little too late for O’Rourke, whose fundraising has dried up as his poll numbers have stalled.”

Sen. Cory Booker Cory Anthony BookerThe movement to reform animal agriculture has reached a tipping point Watchdog confirms State Dept. canceled award for journalist who criticized Trump 3 reasons why Biden is misreading the politics of court packing MORE (D-N.J.): “Booker earned scores of headlines for vigorously attacking Biden at the previous debates. There was none of that on Thursday night, pushing Booker into the background for much of the debate.

Sen. Amy Klobuchar Amy Klobuchar3 reasons why Biden is misreading the politics of court packing Social media platforms put muscle into National Voter Registration Day Battle lines drawn on precedent in Supreme Court fight MORE (D-Minn.): “Klobuchar had several strong moments ... [but] Klobuchar’s night was unremarkable overall and it’s tough to see her path to the nomination as she tries to sell herself as the pragmatic centrist in a race where Biden is dominating that lane.”

Former Housing and Urban Development Secretary Julián Castro: “Castro bet big that going after Biden would be his best path to become a top contender. ... The attacks were praised by progressives eager to see Biden taken down, but many Democrats viewed the attacks as nasty, unnecessary and hitting below the belt.”

Context and details for each from The Hill’s Jonathan Easley: http://bit.ly/30iZikN

IN THE WHITE HOUSE



Sad, just sad:





This morning, President Trump insulted Democrats over what he called a “sad” effort to impeach him. http://bit.ly/2I4m9Kz

He tweeted: “How do you impeach a President who has helped create perhaps the greatest economy in the history of our Country? All time best unemployment numbers, especially for Blacks, Hispanics, Asians & Women. More people working today than ever before.” http://bit.ly/2I6uehB





Trump’s message to Republicans last night:

As Democratic presidential candidates debated in Houston, President Trump spoke to House Republicans at their annual retreat. http://bit.ly/2I89sOJ

The message: “The best is yet to come.”





IN CONGRESS



Sorry, we all can’t hear you:





Via The Hill’s Jordain Carney, “Lawmakers are preparing to ignore President Trump’s request to loosen restrictions on border wall funding as part of a short-term spending deal.” http://bit.ly/2I4g40o

Context: “The ask, included in the Trump administration’s 21-page wish list for a continuing resolution (CR), comes amid renewed tensions over the border ahead of a Sept. 30 deadline to avoid another government shutdown. The administration also announced recently it was moving forward with shifting $3.6 billion from military projects to wall construction.”





This morning — Congress vs. Amazon, Apple, Facebook and Google. Seems fun:





“House lawmakers are escalating their antitrust investigation of Silicon Valley, issuing expansive requests for internal documents to four of the nation’s largest technology companies.” http://bit.ly/30jokAh

How so: “Bipartisan leaders of the House Judiciary antitrust subcommittee sent letters to Amazon, Apple, Facebook and Google on Friday seeking internal communications and documents regarding the use of their market dominance.”





I shall be back:





Sen. Ted Cruz (R-Texas) told The Christian Science Monitor that he hopes to “run again” for president. http://bit.ly/30aGBiV

“Look, I hope to run again. We came very, very close in 2016. And it’s the most fun I’ve ever had in my life. ... The great thing is, every issue I was fighting for in the presidential campaign is front and center in the Senate.”





NOTABLE TWEETS:



Imagine the texts this number will receive:

Hyperlink http://bit.ly/2I6kWST







At Dulles airport:

Hyperlink http://bit.ly/30d4jv3

Watch: http://bit.ly/30d4jv3





ON TAP:





The House and Senate are out. President Trump is in Washington, D.C. Vice President Pence is speaking in Baltimore.

Today–Sunday: The 2019 House Republican Conference Member Retreat at the Baltimore Marriott Waterfront Hotel. http://bit.ly/2ZVAB1t

11:45 a.m. EDT: President Trump received an intelligence briefing.

3:30 p.m. EDT: President Trump meets with Defense Secretary Mark Esper Mark EsperOvernight Defense: Stopgap spending measure awaits Senate vote | Trump nominates former Nunes aide for intelligence community watchdog | Trump extends ban on racial discrimination training to contractors, military Overnight Defense: Pentagon redirects pandemic funding to defense contractors | US planning for full Afghanistan withdrawal by May | Anti-Trump GOP group puts ads in military papers Official: Pentagon has started 'prudent planning' for full Afghanistan withdrawal by May MORE.

Sept. 26: The Hill is hosting “The Future of Mobility Summit” in Washington, D.C. Details and how to RSVP: http://bit.ly/2ZXafvW





WHAT TO WATCH:





12:05 p.m. EDT: Vice President Pence speaks at the 2019 House Republican Conference Member Retreat in Baltimore. Livestream: https://cs.pn/30fhUlw





NOW FOR THE FUN STUFF...:





Today is National Peanut Day.





Pssst, Krispy Kreme has a Friday the 13th deal:





Krispy Kreme is offering two dozen doughnuts for $13 today. http://bit.ly/30gqP66





And to get you in the right state of mind on a Friday afternoon, here’s a golden retriever smiling for the camera: http://bit.ly/30eoVTF