Florida Man Tries Two Carjackings, Discovers Both Drivers Are Carrying Guns

Before the Parkland shooting and Governor Rick Scott’s capitulation to the forces of civilian disarmament, Florida was affectionately known as The Gunshine State. That moniker was earned for having the most citizens with concealed carry permits in the nation…nearly 1.8 million.

One side benefit of all those armed law-abiders going about their business is that it makes things more difficult for law-breakers. That’s a fact that Christopher Hill learned the hard way.

Hill apparently didn’t have much of a plan for robbing a Jacksonville Walmart, but rob it he did. After jumping over a counter and grabbing a cash register, he made his way out into the parking lot. It was only then that he realized he’d probably need a getaway car.

Police said Hill approached a man who was sitting in the parking lot near Supercuts. Hill asked the man for a ride and the man refused. “I turned the ignition off, grabbed my keys, opened the door and boom, there he was,” Scott Reardean said. According to the report, Hill put the cash register in the Reardean’s truck bed and pulled a knife, cutting Reardean on the hands and leg, the arrest report said. … Reardean said to Action News Jax that he was able to grab his pistol from his truck and pointed it at Hill, who then ran away toward Starbucks.

It isn’t clear whether or not Hill remembered to grab the register out of the truck bed. Anyway, at the Starbucks drive-thru, Hill knocked on the window of a woman’s car . . .

She told police she rolled down her passenger’s side window to see what he wanted and she said Hill opened her door and got into the car. The woman said Hill told her to drive because someone was chasing him. She told police she tried to push him out of the vehicle and he would not get out. According to the report, she was in fear for her life, so she got out of her car to get her Ruger pistol out of her trunk. Hill got out of the car and came toward her. She said she pointed her pistol at him and he ran away.

Two drivers, two guns. From there, Hill ducked into the Supercuts bathroom where police eventually nabbed him.

A few lessons; 1) If you’re going to embark on a life of crime, it’s probably a good idea to arrange for transportation in advance. 2) Don’t roll your car window down when a random stranger knocks on it. 3) If you’re going carry a gun, carry a gun. Leaving it in the trunk, where it’s inaccessible is a bad idea. Most bad guys won’t give you an opportunity to retrieve it. 4) Carjacking in a state with the most concealed carriers can be hazardous to your health.

Christopher Raymond Hill, 36, was arrested on charges of strong arm robbery, carjacking with firearm or deadly weapon, aggravated battery with a deadly weapon and trespassing, according to the Jacksonville Sheriff’s Office online inmate information search.

And another Florida Man gets his just desserts.