Cactus Erectus a.k.a Dolores Candle is no easy listening material. The glorious racket of Smooth Funeral, the DJ and producer’s only and frantically raucous record, may be best described as a 47-minute long Slipknot album intro. Indeed, it’s as if the Clown himself was watching over the crazed individual as he was assembling the score to your worst nightmare from chunks of buzzsaw guitars, movie samples, and lo-fi beats.

If that’s the kind of performance shtick that gets you going, you are more than welcome for a ride on Smooth Funeral express. It goes through all nine circles of Hell and you might feel a little dizzy at the end. Actually, your sense of orientation and wellbeing could end up permanently compromised. But it’s all worth it, we promise. Smooth Funeral is what anti-music sounds like when there’s an idea and drive behind the ambition to blow up your speakers in the most sadistic manner possible.Cactus Erectus is as creative as a mad scientist stranded on a lonely island and given utmost permission to do as he please with his test subjects. He takes free reign over whatever musical material he ends up throwing in his studio mincer and mangles it with the arrogance and conviction reserved for Nazi doctors. We are impressed. Terrified, even!

If you are able to appreciate Smooth Funeral for being one huge “f-off” to traditional musical form, congratulations, you have a free mind and strong set of ears. Yet we can’t help but ask – have you been off your meds lately? We are worried!