On Monday, Irina Kristy, a 74-year-old math professor at Boston University, was arrested on allegations that she has been running a methamphetamine laboratory out of her home in Somerville, MA. Kristy has been placed on administrative leave by the university.

Shortly after being taken into custody, an additional allegation surfaced: intellectual property theft.

Upon hearing the news, executives at AMC, the network responsible for MadMen, Walking Dead and Breaking Bad, phoned their lawyers and prepared to sue Kristy for “clearly stealing the entire concept behind Breaking Bad.”

“I find it appallingly convenient that Ms. Kristy has acted in this manner,” said one exec, who wished to remain anonymous. “Not the cooking meth thing, but the fact that she thought she could just rip off an entire show’s concept. It’s sickening.”

After hearing of Kristy’s actions and AMC’s counteractions, executives at other networks came to AMC’s aid.

“Kristy has brought an atrocity upon the students of Boston University,” said an executive in charge of programming at Fox. “Now, it’s like there’s no reason at all for them to watch Breaking Bad. They’ve lived it!”

Added the exec, “God help me if I find out there are high school kids in glee clubs struggling to balance friendship, romance and family drama. You can bet your ass I’ll be suing.”

Kristy has yet to comment on the allegations. A source close to her stated that she was last seen eating fried chicken at KFC, where she was talking heatedly with a skinny, Chilean man wearing glasses. Go to BU? Want to start your own Campus Basement branch? Do you like Breaking Bad too? Then go to “Good Stuff” up top and apply!