Wondering how the transfer window will affect your Premier League team’s performance? Well, fear not. Cancel the Sky subscription, cancel the BT Broadband: the results are in.

Chelsea will win the Premier League by four points. Mesut Ozil’s arrival will not prevent Spurs usurping Arsenal for fourth place and Crystal Palace will finish bottom of the pile. Fulham sack Martin Jol in December.

Possibly. In an attempt to make sense of a bonkers conclusion to this summer’s spending, we asked Football Manager to run a simulation of the League with all the new assembled squads.

All results up to and including Arsenal’s north London derby victory over Tottenham were included and the simulation ran until the end of the season. The database the computer game employs is rather impressive, containing 500,000 players, managers and coaches complied by 1,000 researchers (including real-life scouts) from across the world.

Andre Villas-Boas has admitted to scouting players on it and Ole Gunnar Solskjaer still plays it. FM even sponsored Sky’s coverage of deadline day — further blurring the lines between fiction and reality. It’s all their work so don’t blame me if you think it’s baloney. It’s just a bit of fun.

Chelsea

Eden Hazard, Oscar and Andre Schurrle became Jose Mourinho’s attacking midfield triumvirate of choice as Chelsea beat Manchester United to the title. Samuel Eto’o top scored with 21 goals in 33 games but Hazard was the stand-out player with 15 goals and 17 assists as the Blues scored more goals than anyone else.

Tottenham

Villas-Boas settled on 4-3-3 with Erik Lamela and Christian Eriksen becoming mainstays in support of Roberto Soldado, who top-scored with 19 goals. Hugo Lloris kept 17 clean sheets as Spurs reversed the trend of recent years, overhauling Arsenal with 12 points from 18 in the run-in to finally finish above Arsenal.

Arsenal

Mesut Ozil took up the central attacking role with Santi Cazorla pushed left and despite registering seven goals and 15 assists in 32 appearances, the £42.5million man was not enough to keep Arsenal in the top four. Olivier Giroud scored 16 goals but after being in fourth place by April, the Gunners dropped points to Everton, Hull and Newcastle before defeat to Norwich condemned them to fifth.

West Ham

Over-reliant on Andy Carroll? No bother. He scored 12 times while Stewart Downing, Joe Cole, Matt Jarvis and Kevin Nolan all chipped in with valuable contributions. Never higher than eighth or lower than 12th, Sam Allardyce kept the Hammers well clear of the drop.

Fulham

Jol departed with Fulham in 18th place. Harry Redknapp took over and Dimitar Berbatov went on to score 16 goals while Darren Bent managed 13 to keep Fulham afloat. Redknapp masterminded victories in their final three matches to pull off one of his greatest ever escapes.

Crystal Palace

Marouane Chamakh scored nine goals, Dwight Gayle got seven but the League’s lowest goal tally (32) condemned them to relegation. Managed only four wins all season but Ian Holloway kept his job.

Outside the top flight, Watford were promoted to the Premier League after finishing second behind Championship winners Nottingham Forest on goal difference and Fernando Forrestieri scored 40 goals between them.

QPR were top when Redknapp left to join Fulham but slumped to third under returning manager Neil Warnock. Niko Kranjcar scored 12 goals as they reached the play-off final but lost 2-1 at Wembley to Wigan.

Charlton’s defence let them down as they conceded 63 times but thanks to Yann Kermogant’s 17 goals, the Addicks avoided relegation finishing in 19 place.

Millwall were not so lucky. Relegated on the final day of the season in 22 place, Steve Morison and Andrew Keogh formed a good partnership in attack but their efforts proved in vain.

In League One, Leyton Orient sustained their fine start until a crowded January – including an FA Cup replay – saw them win once. The wheels came off and they finished ninth, one place above Brentford who benefitted from Marcello Trotta’s deadline day arrival with 15 goals but they did not sustain a play-off challenge.

AFC Wimbledon finished 13 in League Two while Dagenham and Redbridge ended up in 17 despite the efforts of top scorer Rhys Murphy.