Today's Lineups:

Home Team

Bernard Westmayne (DynamiteShovel)

Ripper the Wolf (Ripper the Wolf)

Balasar Shieldbiter (Daiko)

Xeaon Ravenwood (Xeaon)

Unavailable

Kilgan Fireheart V (Vilhjalmir) - Still the Gulag

Thoran Stonecrusher (HarryGoLucky) - Possibly dead

Goblin Scourge the Rabbit (Goblin Scourge the Rabbit) - HE'S DEAD!!!!

Shadious Beavertown (ShadyBeaver)

Away Team

Dungeon Master (jptoc)

All kinds of evil shit (jptoc)

Where we left off:

Rabbit dead as hell. Weird tentacle thing dead as hell. Most goblins dead as hell. Party not dead yet.

1 - We're down a sneaky Beavertown, but the Party continue to move on.

3 - Bernard checks the bodies, and grabs himself a morningstar. Xeaon dives down into the cavern and finds a chest that was guarded by the Nothic. 300 gold, 5 gems, two potions of healing and a scroll of augury. The Warlock/Wizard splits the gold and gems but keeps the Scroll.

6 - Bernard gets himself the Sword of Talon, a longsword owned by a warrior that died to the Nothic.

7 - The Party move ahead, planning to look for the armoury, but get distracted by a deck of cards. They're now Bernard's.

8 - They remember Droop the Goblin and turn back to ask him about the rooms ahead.

11 - Turns out there's a wizard ahead. A mean mean mean guy who tricked the goblin to be used however the Bugbears planned, but not in a sexy slave way.

12 - Turns out the Wizard might not be guarded anymore. Man's dangerous though, so it's really not time to fuck with him. We're going to fuck with him though.

13 - Balasar heals himself as Bernard hands Droop a Morningstar, which he barely lifts.

14 - The Party make their way to the armoury now, looking to upgrade their weaponry. They're greeted by a lot of weapons, but no armour. Balasar grabs a crossbow and a quiver of arrows.

19 - Xeaon tries to listen to the door behind which the wizard lies, but his hood muffles all sounds. Bernard tries and hears a bubbling cauldron. Xeaon plans fire.

21 - Xeaon just punts the door down, revealing a bunch of chemical and alchemical shit. We did good. Bernard casts speak to animal on the rat scurrying about because it's suspicious as fuck.

22 - Turns out the rat just doesn't know what a wizard is. Doesn't know what a man is either. Bernard just steps on the rat. No witnesses. It disappears though. Fuck this place.

23 - Xeaon's arcana check shows him that there's a ton of alchemy shit that brews invisibility potions. They're not great though. Found a book about the Lost Mine of Phandelver or something like that. (It's the name of this campaign, I know that much.)

25 - EXPOSITION!!!

500 years ago dwarves and shit agreed to share a mine. Mine had power, and everyone channeled energy to make a forge. Disaster when evil wizards and orcs appeared to destory everything. Spells destroyed the cave with the forge and it hasn't been found since. Nor have the riches.

THere's also a mace called lightbringer which was lost when shit collapsed.

27 - Bernard listens at a door and hears nothing so opens the door. And. He. Sees. A. Room. It's the wizard quarters.

28 - Xeaon investigates the desk. Finds paper and bits/bobs. Bernard finds more gems and gold. Splits the gold but keeps the gems as the Dragonborn stumbles around looking for shit. He fails.

32 - The party leave the room and move on towards another door. Xeaon just walks into the room. Fuck it.

33 - Turns out he walks into the crypt whch has three sarcophygus each with a man against them. There's a gold and copper plated double door and a regular one.

35 - SKELLINGTONS!

37 - 3 Skeletons (Desire / Hope / Dreams) vs. 3 Party members + Droop.

38 - Xeaon casts Thunder Wave. His mastery of it allows him to protect Ripper and Bernard, but he just fucking ignores Balasar. Fuck you, Ravenwood. Fuck you.

40 - Everyone takes major damage, but no one is pushed away. Bernard fails to lift the morningstar and fucks his own shit up.

42 - Ripper dives at the Skeleton in front of Balasar and tears it leg apart. The skeleton crushes its skull on landing.

44 - Balasar is incenced by Xeaon's attack and turns to face the skeleton near Bernard and just crushes it with his greataxe.

46 - Xeaon takes a big hit and stumbles back, but remains standing. He just throws a fireball at it and burns the clothes off it. Stupid wizardses.

47 - Bernard rests his morningstar against the sarcophagus and draws the sword of talon. He fucks up and loses the sword due to a terrible swing. He's basically just Goblin Scourge 2.0.

48 - Ripper, embarrased by his master dives in. He's fucking hopeless too. He has a bone though, so I forgive him.

49 - Balasar in his continued disgust just crushes the Skeleton. Fuck you and your bones.

51 - Xeaon's knowledge of history lets him gleam that these are some really nice family symbols.

52 - The Party take a short rest in the Wizard's room. Bernard casts Cure Wounds on Balasar to aid in his recovery.

54 - They Party head back and run into two more people who ambush them. Daniel and Terrence dive in to the fray.

58 - Daniel's sword just bounces off of Balasar, but Terrence's sinks into Xeaon's flesh.

59 - Xeaon throws a fireball at the barrels under Terrence's feet. He jumps from the barrels in time, but takes some slight damage from the heat.

61 - Bernard dives in with his morningstar unsheathed and completely misses Daniel.

63 - Ripper follows up and dives at Daniel, teeth bared. They sink in, pushed Daniel back into the wall, which collapses under their weight, revealing a passage.

64 - Balasar brings his greataxe down upon Terrence, who crumbles under it. He's not dead, but I bet he wishes he was.

65 - Daniel tries to stab up into Ripper, but misses.

66 - Terrence tries to stab Balasar, but he misses too. Xeaon throws a fireball at Terrence, but misses poorly, burning the room down a little.

67 - Bernard walks towards Terrence, morningstar held high and misses twice. (He's a fucking joke.) It was 'mercy'. Ripper can't finish his kill either.

70 - Balasar asks the two where their master is, but Daniel can't respond and Terrence doesn't know. Balasar just kills Terrence.

71 - Daniel misses his sword swings at Ripper.

72 - Bernard walks at Daniel, pulls Ripper off him and then stabs down at the fallen man. He then walks off. He didn't even fucking get the kill. Fuck sake.

73 - Ripper goes back to finish his kill. He manages to do so.

74 - Balasar grabs Terrence's body and drags it away as the party escape the burning room. Balasar comes out of this with a couple more gold.

77 - The Party burst through the not gold/copper door in Skeleton room and find a woman and two children trapped in prisons with chains around their necks.

79 - Balasar grabs Bernard's morningstar and smashes the door locks, freeing them. The mother, 'Mirna' thanks the party. Turns out her husband was killed. There's a ruined town called Thundertree which has precious family heirlooms and the Party are now entitled to take them.

82 - Everyone leaves the cave. Droop follows. Time to head back into Phandalin.