The NFL is going strong, and we're imagining a world where the NFL adds a hotline for players, coaches and GMs to call to complain about penalties, get clarification on rules and challenge replay challenges – just like the NBA. Of course, commissioner Roger Goodell may change the phone number at any time. All responses are about as authentic and real as Ezekiel Elliott's tackling efforts. We know when that hotline blings, it can only mean one thing: The Packers coach's ears are ringing. Packers vs. Falcons



Dear Mike McCarthy,



You were clearly quite upset with the officials with how they called pick plays. Specifically, you objected to the offensive pass interference flag on Martellus Bennett in the second quarter, and also the flag on Geronimo Allison in the third. In fact, you got so heated on the sideline that you drew an unsportsmanlike conduct penalty just before halftime. And while those penalties were inconsistent, we are baffled by your decision to record a mix tape dissing the referees as a result.



First of all, let’s address what you call your “rap guy name.” MC Carthy? That’s not very cool, nor did it display a lot of effort. You’re already fighting an uphill battle making your hip hop debut at age 53 in the city of Green Bay, and we’ll put this in terms Wisconsin can understand. It’s cheesy. And then some of the song titles – “Discount Double Check Yo Self”? “Hard Block Life”? And if the verse you left on the hotline is any indication, you are going to get sued by Naughty By Nature:



“You down with OPI? Well I’m not that guy!”



We will make you a deal. Randall Cobb can commit two blatant pick plays in each game if you promise to destroy this mix tape. And please, please throw away your du rag.

Treacherously Yours, NFL Referee Hotline

