Owl (left) and Fox (Picture: Sharon Kilgannon)

Growing up as a trans person without any resources or people to look up to is hopefully a thing of the past.

A lot has happened in the past 10 years, and while the media is still incredibly hostile towards trans people, we have made some real progress.

Trans kids and teens are able to come out much earlier and can get the support that they need. Award-winning research from Kristina Olson, University of Washington’s associate professor of psychology, reveals that kids that receive support benefit massively and show lower levels of depression and anxiety.

In essence, supporting trans youth and affirming their identities enhances their quality of life.




Who would have thought?

We know that trans kids and teens need our support, as further research from Stonewall shows that up to 45% of trans youth are attempting suicide due to bullying, lack of support and discrimination.

In the 80s, 90s and noughties, there were little, if any, resources about being trans, and certainly not in the icy, rural picturesque landscapes of Iceland or the warm, sandy dunes of Saudi Arabia where we grew up.

It is hard to describe what that time was like in terms of being trans because we didn’t have the vocabulary, the agency or affirmation that what we were experiencing was truly real.

We both went through life feeling as if everyone else had been given the instruction manual but us.

It wasn’t until much later on that we were able to find the information that we needed, but only after having internalised shame about ourselves and having suffered a puberty that shaped our bodies in ways that we didn’t want.

When we came out, we quickly became aware that if we wanted to access medical treatment or gain some social acceptance, we had to ‘play along’

Once we finally got to the point of coming out as trans, we faced yet another barrier.

Despite society having made huge progress around trans awareness in the last decade, there is still very little knowledge about what it is to be a non-binary trans person.

Most of us have heard experiences of trans men and women but the term ‘non-binary’ still boggles people’s minds.

It is often hard to explain what non-binary is because we lack the language and the recognition to describe our identities. We are instead forced to tell you what we are not – that we are not a man or a woman.

Non-binary gender identities span a wide range from people that experience themselves as both a man and a woman, that their gender identity is fluid and shifts between the two or that they are completely outside of this binary understanding of gender.

It is worth a mention that the existence of non-binary identities has been recorded throughout history in different cultures around the world, and that non-binary people certainly aren’t a new phenomena.



When we came out, we quickly became aware that if we wanted to access medical treatment or gain some social acceptance, we had to ‘play along’ and say we were a trans man and a trans woman.



We were pushed from one box to the other, showing yet again how we as a society are obsessed with binaries.

Our experiences have inspired us to write a book, The Trans Teen Survival Guide. The name stems from a tumblr blog site with the same name, that was started by our dear friend Christina L. Bentley and a friend of hers.

The blog became a valuable resource for trans teenagers and our friend Chrissi dedicated so much time to helping other trans people, giving them life-saving advice and support.

Unfortunately she took her own life earlier this year, and our book is dedicated to her and all the amazing things she achieved during her short time on this planet.



Our wish is that this book will offer trans teens and their families a solid resource with support and affirmations about who they are, regardless of whether that is as a trans girl, trans boy or a non-binary person.

We don’t want anyone in our community to go through what we have.

We want everyone to be able to celebrate who they are, and together strive towards a world where the new generation of trans people can be healthy, happy and proud.



The Trans Teen Survival Guide is now available on Amazon and most major bookstores in the UK.



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