— A viral cellphone video showing a Raleigh woman using a racial slur during a Tuesday night confrontation at a North Hills restaurant is driving conversation nationwide about race relations in the U.S. in 2019.

Nancy Goodman told WRAL News on Wednesday that she was upset three black woman having dinner at Bonefish Grill were loud and behaving in a manner she considered rude. So, she confronted them, and she used the slur in an ensuing exchange, knowing it would offend them.

"I’m not going to say I’m sorry to them because they kept pushing at it," Goodman said. "I would say it again to them. They are the rudest individuals I have ever seen."

Mark Anthony Neal, chairman of the African and African-American Studies Department at Duke University, said Thursday that Goodman's comment and attitude don't surprise him.

"There are still pockets of deep racism in this country," Neal said, "pockets, even here, even in 2019, in which people are still very comfortable using that kind of language to describe African-Americans."

Goodman's attempt to control the women's behavior is indicative of a recent trend nationwide, he said.

"We’re in a moment where there are a lot of random white citizens that have been attempting to police black behavior, whether it’s in a restaurant or a swimming pool or a Starbucks," he said.

A swimming pool in Wendell, for example, last month banned baggy pants, dreadlocks, weaves and extensions from the pool, which some said targeted blacks.

Goodman's insistence that she would use the slur again if she encountered the women isn't surprising, Neal said.

"The thing that we understand about racism is that, very often, people are not remorseful about their acts of racism. What they’re remorseful about is when they get caught," he said. "What was I think interesting about this particular case was her absolute refusal to back down and to say that she was in her right to be able to offend these women."

Goodman said in a Facebook post late Wednesday that she was "ashamed of my actions."

Neal said the same slur has been directed at him in the past – "I think you’d be hard-pressed to find an adult African-American in this country that, at some point in their life, had not been called [that]," he said – and believes most whites simply don't understand how hurtful it is.

"As long as we live in a society that privileges certain identities over other identities, that privileges certain folks over other folks, you’re going to have those kinds of problems," he said.

Many people have defended Goodman on social media, saying she was right to stand her ground or that she was merely exercising her free speech rights.

"Just because someone has freedom of speech doesn’t mean you don’t challenge them on that speech," Neal said. "Somehow, folks think freedom of speech means you don’t have a right to respond to what folks say if it’s stuff that’s offensive."

Challenging such language is the best way to reduce its use, he said.