I have mentioned before that I know Dr. Jill Stein. Our sons—Hi, Noah!—fenced together when they were in high school. She is very smart and very committed to what she believes and an altogether honorable spokesperson for her positions, some of which I agree with and some of which I do not. She also is running for president again as the Green Party's candidate. My larger point is to ask why she is not considered a serious person while most of the announced and potential Republican candidates are.

Since the end of last week, on the subject of the several Supreme Court decisions that came down, virtually every member of the Republican field has demonstrated in one way or another that their party is little more than an open-air asylum for people afflicted with the prion disease that is eating away the higher functions of the party's brain. One after another, candidates have made public statements that not only should disqualify them as presidential candidates, but also should eliminate them from public life entirely. For example, here's Ted Cruz on the tsuris that has overwhelmed him.

Today is some of the darkest 24 hours in our nation's history.

In the Beyond, 3000 one-time New Yorkers all spat in his general direction.

As a solution, Tailgunner Ted proposes...the second-worst idea in American politics.

"Judicial retention elections have worked in states across America; they will work for America. In order to provide the people themselves with a constitutional remedy to the problem of judicial activism and the means for throwing off judicial tyrants, I am proposing an amendment to the United States Constitution that would subject the justices of the Supreme Court to periodic judicial-retention elections," he wrote."Every justice, beginning with the second national election after his or her appointment, will answer to the American people and the states in a retention election every eight years. Those justices deemed unfit for retention by both a majority of the American people as a whole and by majorities of the electorates in at least half of the 50 states will be removed from office and disqualified from future service on the Court," he said.

Very smart, Ted. Much smarter than that silly woman, Jill Stein.

Then there's "Bobby" Jindal, who is running for president because nobody in Louisiana wants him to be governor anymore.

The historic ruling that ordered same-sex marriage legal across the United States came just two days after Jindal declared his candidacy for president. Upon hearing the ruling, Jindal made the audacious request for literally ridding the Supreme Court. "If we want to save some money, let's just get rid of the court, he said.

I look forward to his defense of this reasoned position in the several Republican debates. I especially look forward to the flights of carpet moths that will fly out of his ears.

What's that? The Reverend Huckabee has something to say?

"The Supreme Court has spoken with a very divided voice on something only the Supreme Being can do-redefine marriage. I will not acquiesce to an imperial court any more than our Founders acquiesced to an imperial British monarch. We must resist and reject judicial tyranny, not retreat."

Why was Mike Huckabee on ABC on Sunday? He's plainly so far around the bend that he's on his way back to where he was. Why not just hire the guy off the steam grate in front of the studio?

The putative Republican frontrunner has taken refuge in fantasy.

"As a result of this decision, the only alternative left for the American people is to support an amendment to the U.S. Constitution to reaffirm the ability of the states to continue to define marriage," Walker said in the statement.

Two-thirds of both houses of Congress and three-fourths of the state legislatures? Yeah, good luck with that. (Unless, of course, Walker is lining up with the third-worst ideain American politics.) Walker might as well call for Zombie James Madison to come back from the dead or the timely intervention of Osiris. This is the "smart" political answer within the context of the party of the prion disease.

And I don't know about you, but I reserved judgment on the whole thing until I heard from a spectacularly failed CEO who later became a spectacularly failed senatorial candidate.

Fiorina said she doesn't think the government can deny rights and benefits to those in civil unions. "On the other hand, marriage means something specific...for thousands of years," and it is "not the purview of five people...to think in their hubris that they have the power to change that," she said.

Hubris? This is not a word that Carly Fiorina should use idly.

And the Sunshine Boys? Well, they're both so verklempt over marriage equality that they'd rather talk about the judicial tyranny of Americans having decent health-care. Jeb (!):

"Here is what I believe: We need to put patients in charge of their own decisions and health care reform should actually lower costs. Entrepreneurs should be freed to lower costs and improve access to care – just like American ingenuity does in other sectors of the economy. Americans deserve leadership that can actually fix our broken health care system, and they are certainly not getting it now from Washington, DC."

Take two banalities, drink plenty of liquids, and call me in the morning.

Out in the states, of course, the disease is even more virulent.

The truth is that the debate over the issue of marriage has increasingly devolved into personal and economic aggression against people of faith who have sought to live their lives consistent with their sincerely-held [sic] religious beliefs about marriage.

By the way, it's guys like this who would make up the delegates to the proposed constitutional convention, which is why it is the third-worst idea in American politics.

Fully half the Republican field is not running for president because they actually want to be president. In the brave new political world brought about by this "lawless" Court's earlier decisions, all you need is a sugar daddy and you can run for president as an exercise in extended brand marketing. It is an approach that evinces a fundamental contempt for the actual purpose of self-government. I'm fairly confident that Jill Stein is not running for president for that reason, which is why she is more worthy of respect than most of these clowns.

Charles P. Pierce Charles P Pierce is the author of four books, most recently Idiot America, and has been a working journalist since 1976.

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