By now you’ve heard the news: This morning IHOP sued the makers of the movie “Hop” for trademark infringement. Then Apple sued IHOP for trademark infringement, asserting that the waffle house’s name was likely to confuse customers seeking to purchase its new iHop inter-platform app. Reacting to the uproar, McDonald’s entered the fray by filing suit against Apple on the seemingly spurious grounds that it owned the “Mc” trademark and all variants thereof, and that Apple’s use of “Mac” was confusingly similar and should be disallowed on the same basis that any use of the “Mc” phoneme, abbreviation, or preface was disallowed by the USPTO and similar foreign regulatory bodies. McDonald’s position, though consistent with what it has asserted in the past, raised the ire of the Scotsman Duncan MacLeod, of Highlander fame, who challenged Ronald McDonald to a duel near the ruins of the golden arches in Tokyo, announcing to the press that “There can only be one. And it’ll nae be yon gibbering clown.”

When asked to comment on this sad state of affairs, Silent Bob remained mum.

Disclaimer: None of the statements made in the post above are true in any way, shape or form. Any semblance of truth is entirely unintentional, and will be removed upon appropriate request. The Highlander logo is reprinted with the kind permission of Duncan MacLeod and the Clan MacLeod.