Potential communities of feminists have begun gathering in virtual “safe” spaces. These online communities have established themselves on the web and users are beginning to take them very seriously, so much so that many people rely on them for their social activism. Websites like 4chan and Reddit are just a few platforms where like-minded people can organize or converse, and often people can do so anonymously.

This past week, I participated in many of these online feminist communities and received varied responses. There are many feminist subreddits, Facebook groups, and forums that welcomed me with open arms, but this was not always the case.

Through websites like Reddit and 4chan can bring together users who otherwise could not meet, the nature of anonymous forums also allows users to write hateful comments without consequences. The most popular subreddits, such as r/funny or r/pics, and 4chan subs, like /pol/ or /b/, often have racist, sexist or homophobic undertones. It is difficult to navigate most online forums before giving up on finding anything worth reading. If these web forums are capable of hosting misogynist trolls, it is necessary for online feminist communities to lay a virtual foundation as well.

I began by sharing my most recent Fembot article to such various subreddits as, r/TwoXChromosomes and /r/Feminism. The article examined the homophobia and transphobia that was exhibited in the ‘90s sitcom Friends. The two subs are among the largest feminist communities on the internet, and considering dozens of links are uploaded onto each sub everyday, I did not expect much feedback.

r/TwoXChromosomes describes itself as, “a subreddit for thoughtful content – serious or silly – related to gender, and intended for women’s perspectives.” It is the most popular feminist sub on reddit and is a catch all for any women-related content. Like most feminist subreddits, the sub advertises their zero tolerance policy for “hatred, bigotry, a**holery, misogyny, misandry, transphobia, homophobia, racism or otherwise disrespectful commentary.”

Users can submit questions, articles, links, or anecdotes. For example, user chemmon1 posted photos of her weight loss progress, SithMeBaby1MoreTime shared a quote that was said during a pro-life debate by politician Frederica Mathewes-Green, and Tmoich linked an article about protests in response to the rape and burning of a 20 year old Turkish woman.

Within a few hours of submitting the article to r/TwoXChromosomes, I received 20 percent upvotes and 80 percent downvotes. I was not off to a great start, but I was in good company; the only other commenter also experienced some downvoting. With -1 comment karma, waffletoast wrote “Well I wont be watching [Friends] because I always disliked it and didn’t think it was funny. At least now I’ll be hitting three birds with one stone.” Not entirely constructive, but the fact that a user read my article was appreciated nonetheless.

Feedback from /r/Feminism was less positive. The subs’ banner reads, “This is a space for discussing and promoting awareness of issues related to equality for women.” The foremost function of the subreddit is for users to submit and comment on articles. The user submitted links can touch on topics like transgender violence, or something less serious like feminine hygiene products.

/r/Feminism is the leading feminist sub for article sharing – Seeing as the front page of the sub is filled with articles like Obama Grants 6 Weeks of Paid Parental Leave to Feds, ‘Revenge porn’ illegal under new UK law and Grade 8 girls push for Ontario sex-ed reforms to include the concept of consent, I thought I might hear from more users than I did in r/TwoXChromosomes, but this was not the case. The comment section hosts one lone comment from user XtimmyX. The user commented, “I can’t take this seriously when the author can’t figure out where the apostrophe goes when you’re writing out a decade. It’s ’90s, not 90’s. This is third grade stuff, folks. That being said, even though some of the attitudes in the show are not great, it was a product of its time. That’s how people spoke and acted in the ’90s. To ignore that would be to whitewash history, not entirely unlike removing the n-work from Huck Finn. It doesn’t excuse the behavior, but that’s how things were/still are in the real world :(“

The redditor does make a valid point. “In the real world,” the majority of people are not going to complain if television content is offensive. With that said, this is an issue most users of /r/Feminism are entirely familiar with. The comment is not incorrect, it is just redundant and unconstructive. Friends was one of the most popular TV shows of the late ‘90s and early ‘00s. The widely popular show had real potential to write meaningful and progressive episodes that questioned gender or sexuality norms. Just because it was mainstream to make homophobic or transphobic jokes does not mean the writers had to depict their characters that way.

My experience within these subreddits was not entirely negative, but not very helpful either. Many users have probably found a home in these subs, but unfortunately I was not one of them as I was quickly shunned and cast off.

With no luck on subreddits, I moved onto Facebook groups. Almost every Facebook group required a request to join, but within a day or two I was admitted. A few Facebook groups even asked that I interview before I join. I became an active member of The Network…Women Empowering Women!, a very diverse facebook group in age, race and class, and The Feminist Network, which featured mostly to white, college-age voices. Though The Feminist Network was less diverse in members, the content that was shared was inclusive of all feminist perspectives.

Like I had in the subreddits, I shared my previous Fembot article in Women Empowering Women! A user responded, “[The homophobia in Friends] doesn’t offend me.. like remember threes company when jack had to pretend to be gay? It reflects how society has changed. But neither did it offend me that the Chrissy character was dumb… oh! Remember Archie bunker? When you see that show now you go: !?! He said WHAT?!?” The user made a great point. These episodes are a great benchmark for how far television has come, and there is no point in being offended over things that happened in the past. While I appreciated the critique, I still disagreed.

I had multiple Facebook friends who were members of the Facebook group, so I was very comfortable sharing. I decided to share a few articles that I thought were more likely to stimulate dialogue. The article No, Women Don’t Make Less Money Than Men, by Christina Hoff Sommers, sparked a lot of debate within the group. A user commented “Stupid as this article may be, I think it brings up the valid point that the wage gap may be caused in part by the fact that most STEM fields are so male-dominated,” another user replied “Right, but WHY are they male-dominated?” I answered with (excuse my sarcasm and incorrect use of ellipses), “Life choices…..? Not social stigma, or even written laws?”

My best guess as to why I had a more interactive experience on Facebook groups than on Reddit is rooted in the lack of anonymity. Unlike Reddit feminists, Facebook feminists have their name attached to their comment. The anonymous nature of Reddit allows users to leave aggressive or insulting comments if they disagree with what you have to say. I found that if a Facebook user disagreed with me, they offered constructive criticism or counter examples.

The last online forum I visited was Spacefem. Initially, the online forum was difficult to navigate and looked outdated. The Facebook groups and subreddits had a more user-friendly interface, and were a little more up-to-date, but eventually I got the hang of it. The website is not specific to feminist content, but is specific for feminist users. This can lead to feminists posting threads that have no real opportunity for a feminist perspective. For example, I participated a in a post asking “what kind of pillow do you want?” yet quickly after I left the thread I also commented on a more serious post, titled, “Elementary education and women in STEM.”

Each thread received multiple thoughtful responses and the conversation almost always lasted longer than one day. Some of conversations that I joined had even been around for months. I never ran into a disrespectful or vulgar comment. My biggest critique of Spacefem is that there are not enough active users. A thread will take a little over 6 hours to gain traction to begin multiple receiving responses. If users are looking for a quick feedback or some fast advice, I would advise them to post well in advance or find somewhere else to post. But overall I had a very positive experience and would recommend the site.

This is just the tip of the iceberg. There are hundreds of feminist forums, good and bad, that are establishing their place on the web. Sites like Spacefem and groups on Facebook are still young and they could use all the support they can get, so join the conversation!

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Image via Denis Dervisevic.