We're back for yet another episode of Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez Says the Silliest Things. Everyone's favorite Congresswoman with eleven syllables to her name, but lacking two brain cells to rub together, truly is a marvel.

For Alex's latest attempt at making Bill and Ted look like Watson and Crick, she's claiming the Constitution's age limit on presidential candidates only applies to people with dangles. For reals:

According to a recap in Politico’s Playbook, Ocasio-Cortez was doing a Politico photoshoot at Harvard University when she and a photographer joked about a potential presidential run. “You can’t even run for president for another six years,” the photographer said, pointing out that Ocasio-Cortez just turned 29 years old. “No, not for a long time. Thank God,” Ocasio-Cortez said. “Although we’ve been joking that because the Equal Rights Amendment hasn’t been passed yet, the Constitution technically says he cannot run unless he’s 35. … So what we’ll do is we’ll force the Republican Party to pass the Equal Rights Amendment by threatening to run for president.” “That is awesome,” the photographer reportedly replied. “All the people who say a literal interpretation of the Constitution is the only thing you should be paying attention to.” “I will keep vigilance,” Ocasio-Cortez promised.

Yep, there's no age limit on people with hoo-hahs to take the Oval Office. So, Arabella Orville-Corvette is gonna extort the Republicans by threatening them with their "worst nightmare." There's just one problem. Here's the actual text from the Constitution:

No person except a natural born citizen, or a citizen of the United States, at the time of the adoption of this Constitution, shall be eligible to the office of President; neither shall any person be eligible to that office who shall not have attained to the age of thirty five years, and been fourteen Years a resident within the United States.

Maybe my eyesight's going bad, but I didn't spot a single male pronoun. Probably because there isn't one. "Any person" is pretty clear. Vagina or not, you've gotta be 35 to run the show. The end.

As for Ms. Convex's threat to fire up a presidential campaign, yes please! It would be a clusterfu*k rivaling Communism. The Obamacare rollout. Batman & Robin. Believe me when I say we'd all take great joy in witnessing such a train wreck.

Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez is about to swear to defend a document she's either never read or can't comprehend. She claims she's an American revolutionary, despite representing everything the founders were fighting against. Not to mention, she fancies herself an economic wunderkind, yet she can't wrap her pea brain around the concept of unemployment. Something tells me the Democrats might be having second thoughts about giving her the spotlight.

Poor Alexandria Ocasio is already a contender for most gaffe-prone member of Congress, and she hasn't even taken office yet. She is truly a gift from the comedy gods. Do us all a favor Alex and never change.

While we're on the subject:

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