Shares

OTTAWA — Canadian voters are being wooed by Prime Minister Stephen Harper after it was announced today that anyone wearing an “I Love Harper” button or t-shirt will get a free coffee and Snack Pack of 10 Timbits at any Tim Hortons.

Offer expires October 19.

“Everyone loves Timmies and more than 35% of voters love the Prime Minister and are looking for a way to show their patriotism,” said Finance Minister Joe Oliver in announcing the $6 million government program.

“So starting this morning, any Canadian voter with 2 pieces of photo I.D. can get a free coffee and their favourite Timbits if you wear a Stephen Harper button, shirt, baseball cap, or necktie, — or if have your face painted to look like the PM.”

“I know Prime Minister Harper loves lemon Timbits but I’m more of an Old Fashioned Glazed kinda guy myself,” said Oliver.

Despite grumblings over the government giveaway, Canadians by the tens of thousands began lining up this morning to get their free Harper treats with Tim Hortons/Burger King reporting nearly double the traffic and several skirmishes between a few real Harper supporters and crowds of fakers who just slapped on a button.

One Toronto man was spotted by the Star with a yellow sticky note stuck on his chest reading “I Temporarily Love Harper.”

“Can Canadian voters be bought off with deep-fried balls of dough?” read a headline in this morning’s New York Times with the article going on to explain what Timbits are and questioning whether the program is a good use of Canadian taxpayer money.

Liberal leader Justin Trudeau has called for an immediate investigation of the “blatant bribery and illegal use of government funds” but the party was embarrassed when CTV reported this morning that dozens of Liberal volunteers were spotted leaving an Ottawa Tim Hortons wearing Harper hoodies and nibbling on Timbits.

With the Harper Conservatives continuing to trail Thomas Mulcair’s NDP in polls leading up to the October election, Oliver says the party is focused on rekindling voters’ pride in all the good things about Canada that Stephen Harper has made possible.

“We’re looking at free Canadian Tire dollars for September,” said the Finance Minister.

Robin Steele

Reportering for The Lapine

Shares

Related

Comments