I have been pondering lately. We all have moments where we just sit and think, don’t we? Since my daughter started preschool this August I have had a lot of time to ponder. I keep asking question upon question about human existence, happiness, purpose, influence of technology, creativity, and love. I try to answer them individually to fit my reality in as objectively as possible. And it blows my mind every time. For example how powerful my cellphone is comparing to a computer in the 80’s, and where the progress of technology is leading. How the poorest person in Rwanda has a cellphone and the means to get on the internet and access all information which was unthinkable just 20 years ago. How we don’t need permissions to be happy or live creative lives, and how we collectively as humans advanced on all planes including spirituality. We seem to know the theory and even how to apply it…but why isn’t everyone on board? Is it too hard to turn negative entitlement into positive one?…One that empowers us to create and not be ashamed of it, to love ourselves deeply and unconditionally without judgement? Why are we persistently so hard on ourselves? Why are we the worst judge? Why do we seek validation? I think the answer is love, don’t you? Nobody teaches us to love ourselves first. As a matter of fact it’s frowned upon and perceived as egoistic and pure self indulgence. It’s as ridiculous as can be.

Looking through history of human existence there is vivid evidence that people who loved themselves were amazing. By loving themselves I mean honoring your urges to be creative, because you are on the daily basis even when you make dinner or read a book (yes!). Honoring and accepting the fact you have weaknesses and how they make you feel. Accepting your own freedom to do whatever you are passionate to do. Regarding your current life situation as something temporary, and being happy about it because let’s face it nothing is permanent even our bodies. Why spend the energy to come up with excuses and make them your reality? Why is it easier to love your dog or cat or goldfish more than you love yourself? Turn yourself around and at least give it a shot. You won’t lose your dignity that’s a promise.

Distractions

If you are willing to give it a try start with getting rid of distractions. Distractions like family drama,anger towards someone about something that probably doesn’t matter today, gossiping about others. Creating or participating in an intrigue of any sort are just a few distractions that will only keep you wrapped up in an excuse to hate yourself as a result. Get up in the morning starting fresh and sincerely believe you don’t have distractions. The world won’t end if you do that. What it will do is blow fresh air into your life so to speak. When you practice jettisoning your distractions you will have more peace and time to work on yourself. I even felt giggly, and immediately recognized how incredibly unnecessary and insignificant distractions are, and how easy it was to see that enough was enough.

Be aggressive with the sense of entitlement to love yourself.

Acceptance

When you start feeling glimpses of freedom from things you really never wanted to be involved in, it might surprise you how effortless it really is and you will be eager to move on to a more challenging task which is acceptance. This one is huge. Bigger than we want it to be. Acceptance of self especially. Again if you are rolling your eyes and thinking its something you can’t overcome you are mistaken …and I roll my eyes back at you, friend. Look at your reflection and say “I am”. That’s it. And so you are. Nothing less and nothing more. Only you and yourself. You don’t need to go on a rampage to become a supermodel or an athlete to love yourself. That’s actually the very wrong way to go about it. Believe in this…that your body is a host of what’s inside. Your body will die one day and what’s inside will move on, your spirit will dance among the others possibly looking to be reborn as a human again. Your job in the quest of self love is to grasp the intention by the horns and love your spirit, the very core of your inner self. Don’t waste any time to perfect your physical body because it will never be perfect and you know this, don’t you? Cultivate the feeling of love that lives within the walls of your body. See that what’s inside of you is powerful, is beautiful and ever evolving to the highest potential. Don’t rob yourself of the clarity and ability to see it by merely seeing your imperfect mirror reflection. Accept it for what it is and move into the grand interior.

People get rewards for everything. Some get rewards for inventing some cool useful gadget, some for creating a piece of music, others for cooking, writing, teaching, or caring for others. I believe that majority of those creations came from the place of love. Where else? When something is considered great and it brings people together it must come from love. I don’t see it any other way. It’s not coming from the place to help others and most definitely doesn’t come from a place of wanting to become famous and rich. Those are dumb motives for any sort of creation that’s why we see so many attempts and in turn failures. Trying to accomplish something meaningful must come from the sheer and pure place of love from one’s heart. Thus when you find that place in your heart to turn into loving yourself you are unstoppable, my friend. You will no longer see the world the same and your life is transformed. You won’t be able to go on seeing only obstacles, distractions, things that cloud your mission to better. You will taste the freedom while you still work where you worked before, you will still eat like you did before and mingle with people you did before. The difference will lay in how you start reacting to situations and that is your reward. You won’t take situations as a personal attack and you won’t feel like they own you. How is that for reward? Creating a strong web of inner love is so powerful and potent it will ooze out of you in all aspects of your life. You will easily recognize what serves you best and in turn how it helps others. You will recognize patterns that want to come back to reclaim your mind and shove your spiritual needs to where it’s dark. You will observe how your own thoughts will try to convince you that this is all silly and too hard and too much and nobody cares. Don’t listen. Thank yourself for those thoughts but from now on you have a different plan. A plan that is ignited to be permanent.

Making Changes

Your next step is easy. When you start thinking of making changes in your life that is the very sign that you have began to accept yourself for who you are and that loving yourself at least a little isn’t so crazy anymore. Congratulations! You made it to the point where the potential of reorganizing your life became visible to you. You might start with a small change. For example cutting down your caffeine intake. Or bigger like remembering something from childhood that gave you immense joy..let’s say swimming or drawing. You start swimming or drawing, waking up your creative self. Or even bigger like unfriending someone that annoys you to no end on Facebook or actually stop talking to a friend that feels toxic to you…it’s a real thing by the way. Or even bigger like realizing you are burnt out at your job and you do have some savings and always wanted to travel…and hell, you pack your suitcase and go there but before that you quit your job. What if all that is possible? I tell you it is because I did it. Any life situation can be changed from the place of self love. You will gain mountains of insight and clarity once you realize how important it is to love yourself. People will love you in a different way to. The world will be a different place. It will be your palace and you will be the ruler.

I am merely putting my thoughts out there out of sheer enjoyment for writing and appreciating all that comes after. You might ask why bother? Isn’t there just about million books and articles talking about self love over and over? Yes, there are, but hey, nobody said it like I did. Peace.