Today in a follow-up conference to their announcement of new seasons of Full Metal Panic and Hibike Euphonium, Kyoto Animation also finally announced that they have plans to do a third season of The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya. Additionally, as a side note they have also announced they have discovered the cure for cancer. I sat down with Kyoto Animation’s president Hideaki Hatta to get his statement on this exciting news.

I have to say that I’m really excited, and I’m surely not alone, that The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya is finally getting a third season. Not only that, but this news is coming off the hype of more seasons of Euphonium and Full Metal Panic. Mr. Hatta, I have to ask you, what’s it like being such a genius?

Hatta: “Oh come now, I’m hardly a genius. The real genius is our lead animator, who discovered bacteria in our ink supply that he then figured out could be injected into human beings to completely kill cancerous cells of all varieties. Honestly, I’m not sure why you’re not interviewing him.”

Yeah yeah, the cancer thing is great and all, but he’s not the one who green-lit another season of Haruhi. I mean, this is something people have been waiting years for.

Hatta: “I mean, yes, our upcoming anime slate is fairly exciting, but I’m sure you’d rather find out more information about our newly expanded medical bra-”

So tell me, are you planning on adapting all of the Haruhi novels thus far? What’s the order going to be like? Who have you gotten to voice Sasaki? I’m sorry, I should slow down with the questions, it’s just that this is such a meteoric announcement.

Hatta: “Well, as it happens, we have another important announcement that we think will make you even happier”

You’re telling me you’re adapting a second season of Hyouka?

Hatta: No, not that. The reason we decided to do this interview with you is that as it happens, we recently met with your father, who abandoned you 18 years ago when you were a child but who wanted to finally meet with you after all these years. In fact, here he is now.

Mr. Squob: Hello son.

So… what you’re saying is no Hyouka season 2?



It was at this point that Mr. Hatta and my father fled the room after I threw a chair at him for not being more Hyouka. Still, despite the disappointment of a Hyouka follow-up not being announced, at the very least Kyoto Animation has several other exciting sequels on the way, and also I guess some sort of cancer-curing wonder drug.

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