



This man would later go on to shit all over himself and everything he ever loved. Literally; it was soul wrenching.







Considering they're latex.. then.. maybe? Wut? Hey, you know what isn't vegan-friendly? Unexpected children!







She was such a pleasant shade of bright pink and had stopped sweating. Apparently she had drank nothing BUT beer for two days in 90 degree weather. On-site EMT team ran in three litres of saline on her.



This happens more than I like to think about. People come to the party with "friends", over-indulge, and think that the various volunteer teams are there to babysit while they go back to the party. Nope, we don't have time. Huey and Lewy got to sit in a tee-pee for five hours making sure Dewy didn't try to go running naked into the forest again. I did hook them up with snacks and comfortable chairs though.





First time working a festival with vendors. Everyone is pretty nice folk to each other. I just hooked them up with what they needed. As I wandered around off duty, I kept getting called over to various booths and was gifted lovely food, drink, and occasionally small articles. Apparently medical is a very well loved group. :)

Story continues on the next page!









This pony switched off HARD. He was looking into infinity when I was checking his pupils and I swear you could see the BSOD in the back of his eyes. All the sudden there is a subtle, but not subtle change in his eyes, and a few seconds later he nearly springs to his feet and goes on about how this was the universe he created for himself and that he needed to go back to the party. His camp mates collected him and apparently he had a wonderful weekend after that little hiccup.







Dude. We're Medical, not "Medical". No, you can not take fifty tablets of Benadryl with you "for the road." Put down the damn cough syrup! GET THE FUCK OUT!!





Still one of my favorite ways to pass the time. Yelling at hippies.







I have a pretty strict policy about fraternizing with altered people. I really, REALLY did want to kiss her because she was super cute and super adorable and just saying such lovely things about my beard and my kilt - but she was super enhanced as well. Apparently she kept coming back to medical the next day until I was finally there. I'm pretty sure I kissed and hugged an angel that day. :)







Did you know you can order them in boxed of 5000? I didn't either!!

This is festival magic. To this day, I have no idea where any of that stuff came from. I pass along the blanket to another patient who needed something comforting and warm to hold on to. Magic works best when you pass it along.









Story continues on the next page!





Altered mental states and flesh wounds make for an interesting pair. This poor festee was enjoying a beautiful adventure Lucy and some diamond skies when she slid down a trail side and caught the edge of a barb fence. She was sitting outside of Medical watching her hand and arm drip blood - the sun apparently glinted off of the drops in a fabulous fashion. We have brightly colored bandage tape specifically for these situations. She was wholly content staring at her wrapped hand and arms for the next three hours.`





I'm super proud of this one. Poor little guy comes in because the red cross is a safe haven, as per his parents. In my head, I remember sweeping down with one arm and picking him up in one motion like a badass all the while literally flipped my walkie into the air and catching it push-to-talk on thumb, then blasting out the parent hunt trumpet. My commands echoed throughout the night, being relayed among all prime channels. Deftly responding to every message and inquiry, I was standing there, Roosevelt-tall, back lit by unearthly light, child in arm, when the parents burst in through the doors.





Is this the craziest thing you've seen at a festival?



Source