The British both admire and distrust the Americans, while the Americans feel both respect and contempt for the British – Kathleen Burk recommends authors to explain why

As someone who was born in the US but bred in Britain – I was still malleable when I arrived as an undergraduate – I believe in first amendment rights but bridle when anyone jumps a queue. British-American attitudes have dominated my life, both intellectually and personally. The British have always been fascinated by the US, and over the centuries have written countless novels, stories, reflections and books of reportage on America. In the 19th century at least 200 travellers’ tales were published, a notable example being Frances Trollope’s Domestic Manners of the Americans (1832). A bestseller on both sides of the Atlantic, it confirmed suspicions in Britain of the awfulness of some Americans.

Arthur Conan Doyle was besotted in a different way. In the Sherlock Holmes story “The Adventure of the Noble Bachelor”, his hero said: “It is always a joy to me to meet an American, Mr Moulton, for I am one of those who believe that the folly of a monarch and the blundering of a Minister in fargone years will not prevent our children from being some day citizens of the same world-wide country under a flag which shall be a quartering of the Union Jack with the Stars and Stripes.”

Facebook Twitter Pinterest John Gielgud (left) and Rod Steiger in The Loved One (1956_). Photograph: Ronald Grant

In the 20th century, there was plenty of evidence of cynicism and dislike. Evelyn Waugh’s The Loved One: An Anglo-American Tragedy (1948), set in Los Angeles, displays contempt for both self-deluding English expats and the even more bizarre Americans. David Lodge’s Changing Places (1975), in which academics from Birmingham and Berkeley exchange jobs, is more understanding, as well as funny.

The British both admire and distrust the Americans, while the Americans feel both respect and contempt for the British. Why? They are shackled by history but separated by political and social cultures. Explanations should possibly come in pairs.

Take foreign affairs: I suggest two autobiographies. The first is Over Here by Raymond Seitz, US ambassador to Britain 1991-94, a profoundly interesting book in which he goes far beyond public affairs and assesses the whole relationship. The second is DC Confidential by Christopher Meyer, the British ambassador to the US 1997-2003. It is equally riveting – it was a challenging period. He also probes deeply, but the focus is mainly on the political and diplomatic relationship. He tells us how it works and where it fails. I would love to read a book in which the current ambassadors detail how they are coping with the Trumpian upending of their, and our, worlds.

Size and geography provide a grander perspective on the US as a largely continental empire and the global seaborne British empire. To comprehend this fully, it is best to travel, but if tied to a chair, there are two books that compensate. The first is Tim Marshall’s recent exploration of 10 maps, Prisoners of Geography, which has an excellent chapter on the US. The second is more for the nerds among us: DH Cole’s Imperial Military Geography (1937), whose 400 pages plus 28 maps show how the British empire rose, was sustained, and why it would fall.

• Kathleen Burk’s The Lion and the Eagle: The Interaction of the British and American Empires 1783-1972 is published by Bloomsbury. To order a copy for £25.50 (RRP £30) go to guardianbookshop.com or call 0330 333 6846. Free UK p&p over £10, online orders only. Phone orders min p&p of £1.99.