Hey, it takes two to tango, don't feel like it's completely your fault.

With that aside, using your term, my boyfriend and I did "sexual outercourse" as well (except I don't really believe sex after marriage, just waiting for the right person).

Well eventually, he (of course) get's carried away and he went in a little bit. After that we just kept going farther. So yah, there's my short story for you.

Talk to her. Maybe try to reassure her that nothing really did happen (even if it did, it'll help her calm down to think that maybe she's still a virgin). If she says, maybe explain that it was like a little "poke" and that it still doesn't count. And if she still says so, then I would just comfort her.

Let her know you still care about her. I think the main thing you want to do is that if she doesn't consider herself virgin, at least let her know that her "first time" was really with a guy that cares about her alot. (EVEN if you guys do not end up being together forever). Talk to her, and for the time being I would relax on the sexual stuff and focus on just being together and what not (as hard as that might be). OR, things could be taken further (once she cools down).

I don't really see why she would break up with you (I'd think it'd be dumb to be honest). I think she just needs time to get through the shock. I think I reacted similar (not as bad though). I was upset at first but after a few days it wasn't so bad (but I didn't really tune my bf out so).

I think it's normal that you guys are ready to go for the next level. You've been together for quite some time. Maybe things are just becoming dull that you both want to kind of...get going. Oh! Try do something special for her or surprise her! A dinner you made (spaghetti would be fine honestly!) or take her out to dinner. Watch her favorite movie with her. Like I said, I think the important thing to do is just let her know that you really do care for her.

BTW, my boyfriend and I have been dating for almost 2 years as well...but we had sex like...a month in our relationship, but we're still together for the time being! He was my first (as well as me being his first).