Celebrity TV cook Paul Deen on Friday published a video apologizing for using racial slurs and then moments later blocked access to the YouTube page.

“I want to apologize to everybody for the wrong that I’ve done,” Deen says in a copy of the video obtained by Raw Story. “I want to learn and grow from this. Inappropriate, hurtful language is totally, totally unacceptable.”

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“I beg you, my children, my team, my fans, my partners — I beg for your forgiveness.”

Update, 4:12 p.m. EST: Talking Points Memo posted excerpts from Deen’s 2006 autobiography detailing early racially-charged incidents within her life, including an encounter she had when she was 10 years old with a frequent babysitter, a black woman who, on one occasion, brought her daughter along while watching Deen:

“That child had many big, fat blisters on her hand, probably from helping out her momma,” Deen wrote. “Something about those blisters just attracted me and I remember hitting those little hands with a bolo bat, and it busted her blisters good. It was pretty satisfying. I don’t know why I did it. I have a hard time thinking I did it out of meanness. But her mother — I can’t remember if she slapped me across the face or she spanked me or both – but either way, now I know I sure had it comin’.”

Deen said in the book that after telling her mother and grandparents about the incident, her grandfather had the woman arrested.

She also detailed creating what she wanted to call a “Sambo burger” before being stopped by producers.

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It came about when this motorcycle-driving, long-haired lawyer named Sam told me about his favorite little hamburger joint owned by a guy named Beau. When Sam was out tooling along on his cycle, he’d stop off for the best burger in town, topped with a fried egg, some melted cheese, a load of grilled onions—out of this world! One day, Sam was on my set because we were doing a show about motorcycles, and we were standin’ around talking about these burgers and I told him, ‘Sam I am going to do that burger on the show. We’ll call it after you—the Sambo Burger. You know—Sam, Beau. Sounds great, doesn’t it?’

Deen subsequently called the burger a “Beau burger,” she wrote, “because some people associated the name with an old children’s book that was insulting to black people.”

Update, 4:49 p.m. EST: Both TPM and the Associated Press reported that Deen’s contract with Food Network has not been renewed. It is scheduled to expire at the end of June 2013.

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Update, 5:04 p.m. EST: Deen also released a new video apology, which can be seen under her initial effort.

“I’ve spent the past 24 years to help myself and others,” she said in the new video. “Your color of your skin, your religion, your sexual preference does not matter to me. But it’s what’s in the heart, and my family and I try to live by that.”

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Watch the video below, originally uploaded to YouTube on June 21, 2013.

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Deen’s second apology, posted Friday afternoon, can be seen here.