EXCLUSIVE: The beautiful ballerina girlfriend whistleblower Ed Snowden was set to wed before he left her in Hawaii and fled to Hong Kong to leak NSA secrets. Now she says she feels ‘adrift’

Lindsay Mills, 28, is reportedly the girlfriend Edward Snowden left behind when he leaked information about PRISM surveillance

She wrote on a blog about romantic heartbreak after Snowden fled to Hong Kong

'My world has opened and closed all at once. Leaving me lost at sea without a compass' she wrote

Couple previously went to Hong Kong for romantic getaway



Mills is a ballerina who attended the Maryland Institute College of Art

She performs with the Waikiki Acrobatic Troupe



The whistleblower who leaked the NSA's secrets thought about marrying his girlfriend and had previously taken her on a romantic break to Hong Kong - where he was last seen fearing arrest.



Family friends told MailOnline that Ed Snowden, 29, wanted to be with stunning pole dancer Lindsay Mills for the rest of his life but took the decision to throw it all away to expose the US government.

They were deeply in love and on her blog Mills, 28, dotingly called him her ‘man of mystery’ who she had followed around the world for the last four years.

On Monday she took to the blog - where she has posted dozens of photos of herself semi-naked - to tell of her heartbreak.

Mills wrote: 'My world has opened and closed all at once. Leaving me lost at sea without a compass.

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'My world has opened and closed all at once. Leaving me lost at sea without a compass,' Lindsay Mills writes about being suddenly left by NSA whistle blower Ed Snowden. Mills describes spending time with her mystery man, who clearly resembles Snowden

Stunning ballerina Lindsay Mills, 28, took to her blog on Monday to detail her heartbreak over being suddenly left by 29-year-old Ed Snowden

'As I type this on my tear-streaked keyboard I’m reflecting on all the faces that have graced my path.

'The ones I laughed with. The ones I’ve held. The one I’ve grown to love the most. And the ones I never got to bid adieu.

‘But sometimes life doesn’t afford proper goodbyes.'

Snowden fled to Hong Kong after exposing the NSA's PRISM program which gives officials easy access to data held by nine of the world’s top internet companies, including Google, Facebook, Microsoft and Skype.



It was a heartbreaking turn of events for Mills who had lived with Snowden since at least 2009 when they were in Japan together.

Last year he whisked her 8,000 miles from their home south of Baltimore, Maryland to Hong Kong where family friends thought they got married because it was a 'special place' for them.

Now he is back there, hiding out and terrified he will be arrested and extradited back to the US for leaking details about how the NSA puts millions of Americans under surveillance.

Mills’ blog gives an insight into the ups and downs the couple went through - and her own feelings against the snooping state.

Their relationship may have been brought to an unconventional end - but it hardly seems conventional from the start.

Written under the name ‘L’s Journey’ she calls Snowden ‘E’ and her ‘man of mystery’, whilst referring to herself as a ‘vagabond’.

On the face of it they are totally different people - she is an extrovert who enjoys walking around naked whenever she can, spends her Sunday evenings in circus classes and surrounds herself with bohemian eccentrics.

The title of her blog reads: ‘Adventures of a world-traveling, pole-dancing super hero.'

In an early post on August 17 2011 she also writes: 'I’ve always wanted to be splashed on the cover of magazines, with my best air-brushed look. Unfortunately I wasn’t born a greek, amazon, sex goddess - but a petite dreamer.'

Better times: Lindsay Mills seen here with Ed Snowden before he suddenly took off for Hong Kong after leaking confidential information

This photograph of a Hawaiian sunset was taken by Mills recently. She has taken to her blog to write about her regret over how 'sometimes life doesn't afford proper goodbyes'

Snowden by contrast is a shy computer geek from a suburban family who likes to spend Sundays at football games and needs to be coaxed out of his shell to even do karaoke.

Mills writes that when she finally introduced him to her friends in Hawaii they didn't believe he actually existed because he was so hard to pin down.

Before they moved to Hawaii they spent their days doing things like camping, pumpkin picking or skeet shooting together near their Maryland homes.

He bought her gifts like a Star Trek style visor and took many of the dozens of pictures of her on her blog.

Some of the posts now have a certain irony, such as her joking that she likes pretending to be a spy.

At one point she writes: 'In case you didn’t know, I am an international woman of mystery. Or at least I will be in tonight’s performance. Going 007 with a twist for this Friday’s show.'

Their lives also seem to be very much up in the air and she writes of having traveled through 17 countries in her life.

In March last year she writes of how her ‘inevitable lover Change is knocking and I wish I had an answer for him’.

She writes: ‘We received word that we have to move out of our house by May 1.



‘E is transferring jobs. And I am looking to take a mini trip back East. Do I move with E, on my own, to Antarctica? How long do I spend back home and when should I go?

‘For now I’ll spin my magic ball and see where I land.’

It appears that Mills was performing with the Waikiki Acrobatic Troupe. She also took classes last year from another troupe, Samadhi Hawaii, though never performed with the company

That month Snowden moved to Hawaii and two months later Mills joined him.

She freely admits that it was to save their relationship as they appear to having been going through a rocky patch that continues after her arrival.

She writes how she seriously considers taking a plane home most days and that she can’t settle down - until July comes.

Then she writes: ‘The sun falling, sweat-building, and my yard growing tidier - I looked over at E and smiled.



‘This was the most adult, boring moment I’ve had ever. I felt grown up, suburban, and oddly content.



‘But neither of us can stay adult for too long, as yard work turned into palm fencing - a duel that ended in laughter instead of death. I was able to find my happy romantic date in the end.



‘Proving that you don’t have to do big fancy things or go far from home to reconnect with someone you love.’

Come April 13 this year things were still going well when they moved into another new place on the back of his $200,000 a year salary with defense contractors Booz Allen Hamilton.

She writes: 'E and I received the keys to our next abode yesterday. My favorite part of moving is the pre-packing stage where I can roll around big empty rooms in soft window light (I may have been a cat in my former life).

'We took time to envision what each room could look like once we crammed our things in them. And even discussed hanging silks in the two-story main room.

'But before we can get into silly decorating there’s the monumental task of the other house. A task I am dreading. One that I have little time for.’

Performer: Lindsay Mills performs in the Waikiki Acrobatic Troupe and in dance shows in Hawaii

According to the rest of the blog, it was all idyllic until earlier this month, when the darkness returned to their lives.

Writing on June 3, Mills said: ‘While I have been patiently asking the universe for a livelier schedule, I’m not sure I meant for it to dump half a year’s worth of experience in my lap in two weeks time.



‘We’re talking biblical stuff - floods, deceit, loss. Somehow I’ve only managed a few tears amongst all of the madness of May.’

Another revealing aspect of her blog is that Mills seems to share Snowden’s views views on the surveillance society.

Writing on July 4 last year she says that the America she loves is ‘ever-changing’ and that she is in ‘fear it’s straying from the freedom it has always represented’.

She writes: ‘America is still one of the greatest, but she’s falling in my eyes. I hope her people see where she’s going and ask themselves “is this really how I want to live?”.

Another post will be of interest to investigators looking to find out what she knew - a poster in protest against the Stop Online Piracy Act, which is currently being considered by Congress.

If passed SOPA will make copyright rules more strictly enforced to a level which Mills claims is draconian.

On her blog she writes in terms that sound as if they could have been written by Snowden himself.

She writes: ‘Normally I’d be hitting you with a riveting entry about my super hero life, but today I wanted to join others in protest of SOPA.



‘A bill that poses to allow the government to control the very thing you’re reading my blog on — the internet. The way users (people like you and me) share information and ideas freely across the internet would most certainly change.’

She then urged readers to sign a petition and email their Congressional representatives.



Keeping a secret: Snowden says he never told his girlfriend about his life-altering plans, saying he left weeks ago saying only that he had to travel for business

Snowden left Mills behind in Hawaii weeks ago when he leaked classified information about PRISM, a secret government phone surveillance program that harvests data on millions of Americans from telecommunications and online companies.

He never told her where he was going or what he was doing - only that he needed to leave for a few weeks. He is currently on the run, location unknown, after he fled the Hong Kong hotel where he is holed up

The TV news program Inside Edition claims to have tracked Mills down in Hawaii, where she is the member of an acrobatic troupe.

It appears that she was performing with the Waikiki Acrobatic Troupe. She also took classes last year from another troupe, Samadhi Hawaii, though never performed with the company.

She lives in the home that Snowden, a private contractor making $200,000 working with the National Security Agency, rented in Hawaii.

She graduated from the Maryland Institute College of Art and is a former ballet dancer.



When Snowden revealed his identity in the Guardian newspaper on Sunday, he also revealed that his girlfriend knew nothing of his plans to make the biggest leak of classified government information since WikiLeaks.



Snowden told the newspaper that Miss Mills was not surprised that he was packing his backs and not telling her where he was going.



'That is not an uncommon occurrence for someone who has spent the last decade working in the intelligence world,' he explained to the Guardian .



Hotel hide-out: The Mira Hotel, pictured, in the Tsim Sha Tsui neighborhood of Hong Kong has confirmed someone named Edward Snowden was a guest at the hotel but checked out on Monday

Now what? Mr Snowden's whereabouts are now unclear after he checked out of the Mira Hotel, pictured, on Monday

Prisoner: Mr Snowden described how he had barely left his room, similar to that pictured, at the hotel, now revealed to have been the Mira Hotel

On the run: Mr Snowden is believed to be on the run after checking out of the Mira Hotel, pictured, on Monday

He said Miss Mills has been visited twice since his disappearance by NSA federal agents and by local police, though he suspects it was because he didn't show up for work.



Snowden said he was willing to sacrifice his relationship with his family - and possibly never see them again - because he believed leaking the information about the PRISM program was so important.



'The only thing I fear is the harmful effects on my family, who I won't be able to help any more. That's what keeps me up at night,' he told the Guardian.



Federal agents this afternoon visited the Pennsylvania home of Edward Snowden's father and stepmother, just hours after the 29-year-old NSA whistleblower checked out of his plush Hong Kong hotel and went on the run from U.S. and Chinese authorities.

Two men, identifying themselves as FBI agents, dropped in on Lonnie Snowden, 52, and his wife Karen Snowden, 48, at their property in Upper Macungie Township, as the couple were still 'digesting and processing' the news about their son.

'MY WORLD HAS OPENED AND CLOSED ALL AT ONCE': Complete posting by Lindsay Mills For those of you that know me without my super hero cape, you can probably understand why I’ll be refraining from blog posts for awhile. My world has opened and closed all at once.

Leaving me lost at sea without a compass.

Surely there will be villainous pirates, distracting mermaids, and tides of change in this new open water chapter of my journey. But at the moment all I can feel is alone.

And for the first time in my life I feel strong enough to be on my own. Though I never imagined my hand would be so forced. As I type this on my tear-streaked keyboard I’m reflecting on all the faces that have graced my path. The ones I laughed with.

The ones I’ve held. The one I’ve grown to love the most. And the ones I never got to bid adieu.

But sometimes life doesn’t afford proper goodbyes. In those unsure endings I find my strength, my true friends, and my heart’s song. A song that I thought had all but died away, when really it was softly singing all along.

I don’t know what will happen from here. I don’t know how to feel normal.

But I do know that I am loved, by myself and those around me. And no matter where my compass-less vessel will take me, that love will keep me buoyant.

Mrs Snowden said on Sunday night that they had been 'bombarded' by media since Edward Snowden revealed himself to have leaked top-secret documents detailing the government's extensive surveillance programs.

The woman refused to give any details about her stepson, other than what he'd already offered up in interviews, but she told Leigh Valley's The Morning Call the family would be making a public statement in the coming days.

According to mcall.com, shortly after Mrs Snowden shut the door, the two men approached the house, telling a photographer they were agents with the Allentown FBI office.

In Laurel, Maryland, a neighbor of Mills' father Jonathan, 48, who works in computing, said that he was a 'quiet guy' and that they were in shock over what had happened.

The neighbor, who has lived on the suburban street for 20 years and had seen Mills grow up, said: 'I remember seeing Jonathan last year and I asked why his daughter has not been around.

'He said that she had been in Hong Kong with her boyfriend.

'I thought they had gone out there to get married. It must be a special place for them.'

The neighbor added that Mills has only visited a few time in the last year but 'always seem very happy'.

The neighbor said: 'She always was a good kid.'

Jonathan Mills declined to comment when he arrived home in his car with the personalised number plate with the word 'Progwiz' on it.

He told reporters that his daughter was 'keeping a low profile' and declined to reveal where she is now.