The Doc robs a cash machine; Rose drinks a cup of beef; and Adam proves he’s a prick by getting a hole drilled into his forehead.

The 9th Doctor, Rose and whatshisface (annoying, token English guy – Adam. That’s right.) materialise aboard a news broadcasting satellite at the peak of the 4th Great and Bountiful Human Empire, only to find that everything seems to be about 90 years off.

Journalists have plugholes in their foreheads to transmit news straight from the brain; there are no aliens around; and the only thing on anybody’s mind, except for ‘Kronk burgers’ and the aforementioned plugs, is being promoted up to the satellite’s auspicious Floor 500, where the walls are made of gold.

The editor in chief is watching them, though, as is his adjutant (played masterfully by Simon Pegg).

Time for Doc & Friends to stop the presses.

The Kronk Chef, master of haute cuisine in the year Icantrememberwhenanymore. Rose, Adam and The Doctor trying to guess the WIFI password. Everything about this man offends me. Paradoxically, many actors pale in comparison to Pegg. Science Fiction or Publishing Fact? Yeah. Suck on that for a moment. Worst upskirt shot ever. Also: Jagrafess has an underbite. Doc enjoys f**king with Adam a little too much.