Endurance athletes are insane, but some of their insanities make more sense than others. Ultramarathons may be madness, but at least they take place in the great outdoors, and sometimes in some very picturesque places. It’s still madness to run across Death Valley in the summer, but I at least acknowledge the grandeur of the effort, okay?

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With that said, let’s just all acknowledge that running 3100 miles over a month and a half around the same half-mile block in Queens is dumb, and that the six men who have ever completed the race are the Timelord Dukes of Dumbington Estates.