CELEBRITIES

A young man finding a sexy older lady to use him like a homeless man discovering an abandoned shopping cart is one of the great windfalls that can find him. I was not so fortunate as a young lad, but I had a friend who was and the stories he told were wild. Now, I never met the woman because she lived a couple towns away and was always busy when I was free, but I have complete trust that he was telling me the truth. Why on earth would an adolescent lie to his peers about something like that? What could he possibly have to gain?

Personally, I see no reason why one should lie about their sexual conquests. Lying about those is like creating a life for someone else, and you cease to exist. If I was going to lie about anything I would prefer to lie about the house. Getting laid is tiring, but sprawling along the couch and binging Murder She Wrote is as satisfying as any night out. I don’t even have anything to be ashamed of with that lifestyle, and the chances of me landing an older woman increase tenfold. The only catch is that they’d be geriatrics.

Photo Credit: Mr. Skin