When was she ever afraid? Never. Not like this.

Anna's breath strangely quick and shallow, as the unpleasant buzz roaming her chest insisted she should move. In this state, with her eyes still fixed on the uninjured palm of her hand, Anna's thoughts wandered, seeking an answer to her latest question. ~Why?~ This quest was sure to fail, as she had no comparison to what she was dealing with, understanding of recent events eluding her; the experience was too novel.

When Anna found that the new was far too confusing, she turned to the familiar. Elsa. The thought of her sister summoned images of the older girl running out of their room, slamming the door shut. This memory brought a sudden determination, a sense of purpose.

She needs to find Elsa; show her that she's not hurt. Not this time.

Anna rolled to the edge of the bed and slid off, landing awkwardly. She collected herself, made a few rushing steps toward the closed door and stopped before it.

Elsa could be right outside, even leaning against the door. If she were to suddenly push it open, she could startle her sister. Anna didn't want to scare her off.

Knock. Knock. Knock.

"Elsa?" The redhead spoke through the keyhole. "Are you there?"

She put her ear to the door, trying to catch the slightest response, but she heard nothing. Anna's reaction twofold; her heart sank, but there was something else that came from the corner of her mind and she didn't like it. She pushed that thought away.

Anna pressed the palms of her hands to the door, and it gave in; letting out its usual, small creak, it revealed the hallway. She popped her head past the frame looking down the hall. It was empty. Anna sighed and lowered her head. ~She really ran away.~ She recognized her hope that Elsa didn't escape into the depths of the castle, and was just outside the room, to have been overly optimistic.

That dreadful thought invaded from beyond the conscious part of the mind. ~No! She's my sister, I love her!~ Anna bit her lip as she gathered the willpower to push past it.

She set herself in motion, walking on the soft carpet that tickled her bare feet. She was off to find Elsa.

Anna roamed the halls of the top floors, peeking into various rooms. She checked the common room, father's study and the many vacant guest accommodations. Every door she opened reviving the hope that Elsa is right there, waiting to be found, but each one of them disappointed the young girl, as none sheltered her older sister. When she had to concede and conclude that Elsa wasn't on these floors, she sat on the top step of the main staircase, pouting. Anna wrapped her arms around her body, rubbing the heat in; she wasn't impervious to cold as Elsa was.

She thought about her options. The rest of her home wasn't as promising as she'd like. In truth, she didn't know where to go next. At this morning hour, the lower levels would be populated by many people of different professions in the royal employ. She knew this, Elsa knew this. There was also the fact that there weren't many interesting places down there and definitely not ones that are useful for hiding from your sister.

She immediately dismissed the garden, Elsa wasn't the one to eagerly go outside. Kitchen and pantry were out as well, the cooks are busy with the breakfast. Throne room? Anna just shook her head. The list went on, until her mind wandered to the room that she rarely paid attention to; the room that she only ever passed through. The one place she should have checked first.

She rose quickly, running down the stairs then through a corridor, narrowly avoiding crashing into one of the maids that happened to turn a corner at an inopportune time. In the moment, the woman gasped with a high-pitched noise, but ultimately seemed unsurprised by Anna's behavior and moved on about her business. Shortly after Anna resumed her attempts at reaching her destination, she stood before a pair of tall doors to the ballroom. Anna pushed, but they wouldn't budge. Elsa couldn't lock, but maybe she froze them to ensure her solitude? She examined the door, looking for signs of frost, but instead she found a note pinned to the wood.

Anna wasn't an expert reader. She could understand some words, but this note was definitely out of her league. Still, she knew who wrote it. It was Gerda, the head housekeeper. Anna didn't try to guess the contents of the woman's message, it didn't matter. Elsa wasn't there.

Unwanted thoughts appeared from the still little understood part of her mind, but she managed to fight them off.

The young redhead turned around, and walked the path she took from the stairs. She had no more ideas, that was the last of it. Elsa could be anywhere, any part of the castle or attached grounds. Maybe even the town. ~She could be in trouble.~ Anna could feel out of her depth. She no longer possessed the confidence that she can handle this alone.

Her parents. They will know what to do.

Following the same hallways as the ones she just ran through, she thought of the ballroom, recalling the events of the night.

She saw Elsa and the snowman that they built together. Olaf, was it? She remembered the games they played in the snow and the fun they had. She recalled the way she jumped between pillars that her sister made for her on demand. She saw the streak of light flying toward her, then blackness.

Anna slowed down to a stop. ~It's my fault.~ The realization was more chilling than any of her exposure to Elsa's powers. Her recklessness was the cause of everything that occurred last night. Every bit of pain she saw on her sister's face when she woke up was her own doing, and all it would take to avoid it was being just a bit more careful. ~I'm sorry, Elsa.~

She walked again, faster. Navigating familiar passages to find the quickest way to her parent's chambers. Her mind between guilt and worry, but at least she knew the origin of those feelings. In the light of her recent foreign thoughts, knowing why things were happening to her was strangely comforting.

Before long, she saw the door to her and Elsa's room. It was still open, exactly the way she left it. She knew it wasn't the most likely of scenarios, but Anna managed to embrace a glimmer of hope; hope that Elsa is inside, sitting by the window or sleeping in her bed.

No. Empty. Hope extinguished.

Anna hung her head and moved past their bedroom down a short hallway leading to the neighboring king's chambers. Clutching and rubbing her arms when the cold made itself known again, she turned the corner. An audible gasp escaped her when she spotted the object of her search, Elsa, right before her.

Elsa shut their bedroom door with force, slamming her back to it for a moment. ~Not again.~ Anna's horrified expression freshly burnt into her mind. ~Not again.~ The thought echoed.

She sprang from the door and ran. She had no destination, she only meant to get away from her sister. Elsa could barely see where the steps took her, as tears came to her eyes. Was this how the rest of their lives would play out? Anna suffering because of her?

Elsa hit a dead end much sooner than she expected. She recognized the door before her and stared at its blurry image in confusion. For several moments no clear thought came through the torrent of emotions she held back, but eventually she managed one. ~Why did I come here?~ Was it her obscured vision and panicked navigation, or did she intend to end up before her parent's room?

Maybe she thought Anna needed help, or maybe she wanted to be close to mother and father. Yet, looking at the towering door, she couldn't find the words that she would speak if they stood before her. What could she say? ~I hurt Anna again?~

When Elsa imagined their response, the word monster came to mind. She knew why. She already heard them say it. It was a dream then, but could she blame them if they used it now? Elsa looked to the wooden floor.

Nothing in her life suggested that her parents would think of her that way, but none of this was like the rest of her life. She had no past experiences of harming Anna and her sister never looked at her with fear drawn on her face. ~Maybe I am-~

Knock. Knock. Knock.

Elsa inhaled sharply and turned around. The sound came from down the hall. She hoped it wasn't Anna.

"Elsa?" It was. "Are you there?" Her voice was faint but clear enough in the silence that surrounded her.

She moved to the wall near the corner, resting her back against it. ~No, Anna.~ Elsa slid downwards, sitting on the bare floor and pulling her knees to her chest. There was comfort to find in how her sister had enough strength to follow her, or in that she wanted to look for her in the first place. However soothing these thoughts were, Elsa's mind still returned to Anna's expression from when they touched. She couldn't allow herself to forget. Tears that accumulated on her eyes overflowed and followed her cheeks, before falling off. She covered her mouth with a hand, afraid she'd make a sound.

Elsa recognized the slight noise of their door opening, but heard nothing else. Would she be able to hear Anna approach? Her heart was already racing as it was, and the expectation that her sister was about to find her was only making it worse. ~Please stay there. Please.~

What is she going to do? Will she run? Can she talk to her? What can she possibly say? ~I'm sorry.~ But she said that already and then she froze Anna's hand. She needs to stay away.

Time slowed down, maybe occasionally stopped. Mere seconds seemed like minutes of agonizing anticipation. Those minutes then turned into a different order of time of unknown magnitude; she lost track. Nothing was happening and eventually Elsa's senses went numb; she calmed down, when she figured the danger is long gone.

Thought wandered to her next course of action. Where would she go now that she didn't need to blindly follow the hallways, hoping to put distance between her and Anna?

Elsa knew the castle well, but she had a feeling Anna knew it just as well, if not better. Her sister was three years younger, but the fearless explorer that she was, the redhead often found ways to surprise Elsa with her knowledge of their home. Who knows how many secrets she had yet to share.

She mentally browsed her options for a location to shelter herself in, but surprisingly, not many were viable for lengths longer than a couple of hours. Eventually, Elsa found that the chapel within the walls was best suited for the job, since to the best of her knowledge, the earliest disturbance of peace she could expect there would be hours away.

As she thought of the safest way to get there without walking into Anna and preferably anyone else, she found that her mind slowed down. It became hard to keep a straight record of the ideas she had already considered.

Elsa's eyelids were heavy; it was much easier to keep them closed. She thought she'd give in for a moment. She'll need the strength to get out of the castle.

Minutes later, none of that mattered. Elsa found peace in the forgiving embrace of a dreamless sleep.

Upon the sight of an awkwardly resting Elsa, Anna's heart picked up the pace; excited and happy to find the blonde, but she knew there was something else to her reaction. She managed to blow those thoughts away.

"Elsa," she whispered. "Are you-," she began, but found the words pointless as her sister wasn't going to answer. The uncomfortable position in which Elsa drifted off was a testament to how exhausted she must have been.

Anna lowered herself to her knees then leaned back to sit on her heels before Elsa. She wondered if there was a way to adjust the older girl to a more manageable configuration, something that didn't look like it could be painful. Ideally she would turn Elsa to her side and cover her with a blanket, but she was worried that'd wake her up from her much deserved rest. That would be a torment, and Anna wasn't sure if only for Elsa.

For every idea to improve her sister's condition, Anna had that awful place in her mind remind her of its existence. Ensuring she would not ignore the confusing emotions she felt toward Elsa ever since their hands touched. This resulted in Anna idly sitting in front of Elsa, stuck between the heart and the mind. One pushing to help the older girl, the other insisting on remaining motionless.

It was at least a dozen minutes before Anna could no longer bear the conflict. She admitted defeat and rose from the ground.

She was still looking back as she walked away; turning the corner and losing sight of Elsa weighed on her heart. Anna fought against the guilty feelings of leaving her sister behind in that state. While at first it was a losing battle, with every step she took back toward their bedroom, something else offset her negative emotions.

That dreadful corner of her mind was rewarding her for leaving Elsa behind. The force clutching her chest through the search of her sister was letting go. She barely noticed it before, as it was constantly with her, but now that it was gone; she felt incredibly relieved.

Relief.

That's what that wicked place in her head tried to push to the foreground of her mind. Not only now, but every time she failed to find Elsa behind every door she tried.

As she reached the entrance to their bedroom, Anna looked to her bed. She tried to understand the unwelcome thoughts and invading feelings, but they didn't make sense. Not yet. She knew, however, that so far they stood against everything she knew and loved. They stood against her sister.

Biting her lip, Anna summoned determination. ~I love Elsa.~ She felt uneasy as something constricted her chest once more. She fought it, as she vowed to fight it every time it would ever appear.

~I will not let her go.~