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Jay Feely loves Tim Tebow. He respects the heck out of him. He couldn't appreciate his efforts in the community any more than he already does.

But he does think, when it comes to football, Tebow is braised garbage marinated in a creamy failure aioli topped with irresponsibly sourced poop passes and mixed greens.

In short, Feely thinks the Philadelphia Eagles' new signee is a good guy but among the most terrible professional football-throwers he's ever witnessed with his own eyes.

The veteran place-kicker expressed his thoughts during Tuesday’s episode of Jim Rome on Showtime. When asked for his opinion on the Tebow signing, Feely said he thought it was a product of Chip Kelly’s arrogance and that it's difficult for him to reconcile his feelings about Tebow the person with his feelings about Tebow the awful football player:

I think [Kelly] thinks he’s smarter, and so [he] can take a guy that everybody else has quit on and [he] can make him work and utilize him. ... [Tebow] is such a dichotomy for me because I really respect the person, the man, the things that he believes in and the things he does off the field, [but] he was the single worst quarterback I ever saw in my career in the NFL. Like, I watched him one day. I sat and watched him do routes on air with Ken Whisenhunt as we were playing the Broncos, and routes on air—there’s no DBs, you know exactly what he’s going to run. There’s no pass rush. He had like 13 incompletions in routes on air. Like, Jim, you and I could go out and do routes on air and we’d complete most of our passes.

That's some hot-take fondue coming from a place-kicker, but, then again, Feely’s been in the league since Furby was a thing and has seen his share of good and bad passers.

Feely took to Twitter on Wednesday morning to reiterate his opinion, which is taking flak from the Tebow faithful:

Relax, everyone.

This is just the tip of the take-berg. At this point, we should all be aware that as long as Tebow draws breath on this mortal plane, opinions will continue to fly about whether he can throw the ball and whether he should be used in Wildcat formations or as the ultimate grit warrior: the quarterback-fullback hybrid.

At this juncture, I hope Kelly takes the Eagles offseason to DEFCON 1 and jettisons Sam Bradford for Johnny Manziel, as Grantland’s Andrew Sharp suggested earlier this week.

Pour nitroglycerin on the take-ferno, Chip. Do it right before team camps begin. Let us drink mai tais and watch the world burn.





Dan is on Twitter. Tebow Takes are responsible for 25 percent of Earth’s CO2 emissions.