Edgelord

'Oh man. This is so goofy,' the Solar Princess keeps reciting in her head. 'I haven't actually seen battle in…two hundred years?' The truth was, Celestia hasn't even been in a physical fight in half a millennium and some change.



It was quite off putting, then, when she was told that her castle had been stormed, and her guard fled. In facts she might both have been ready in time to meet the threat if her sisters familiar hadn't gotten to her early.



Donned in her radiant raiment (yes, she quite thought the name was goofy also), she had earlier made way for the dawnstar greatsword (again, the name ruined the effect in her opinion), and stood before it now as the chamber it was in was incinerated around her.



The beast responsible? A hulking, massive dragon wyrm of the south, running rampant across equestria. The titanic, scaled flamethrower roars a monstrous yell, audible across the continent, more smoke and smoldering sulfur spewing from his razor-sharp, sword-sized tooth limed maw.



Its behemoth, amber yellow eye turns its voidally black slit pupil onto the impossibly tiny, sugar coated politician with a love for cake, a rainbow mane, a slightly-too-large-for-this-platemail sized butt, and a sword. The creature instantly chooses to act, leaning back and taking a deep breath, and holding it there with some effort, before swinging forward again and…



Burping, releasing a tiny black cloud. Rex then continues to scratch his ear, lick his balls, and start moving back down the other face of the mountain, a small human with a small cord of torn leash hanging from his hands while he waves his arms, yells, and calls for the pet.



Blinking a few times, Celestia takes a face, grumbling as she replaces the dawnstar claymore, and looks around at the destruction she needs to pay for…



"Dammit Anon…That's the last time you take training advice from Fluttershy."