I miss Adam Schiff. Seems like the last time he appeared in the news was, let’s see, 30 years ago? Or does it just seem that way?

Well, he’s still a thorn in Donald Trump’s side. And he still has a deep understanding of our Constitution that has somehow eluded the pr*sident. (If you can show me any evidence that Donald Trump has even read the Constitution I will snort a line of bullet ants through my own fibula and then party on by playing my defleshed metacarpals like a pan flute.)

x There is no Ã¢ÂÂreopeningÃ¢ÂÂ without a plan to get the virus under control and keep it that way.



TrumpÃ¢ÂÂs false claims of absolute power are alarming, of course. But his failure to scale up testing is unforgiveable and deadly.



His power isnÃ¢ÂÂt absolute Ã¢ÂÂ but his incompetence is. https://t.co/1qrLRa6E4b — Adam Schiff (@RepAdamSchiff) April 14, 2020

Of course we shouldn’t reopen the country without a plan. And that plan needs to be informed by science, not wishful thinking or evangelist preachers’ bonkers interpretation of the Book of Revelation.

And this isn’t just a question of the stock market vs. public health. You can “restart” the economy all you want, but it won’t keep running if the virus comes back. Which it will, without a serious plan.

And the one thing you can count on is that Trump won’t have a serious plan, because this:

I thought the point of a Council to Reopen America was to make me feel safe about going out in public again, not make me want to hide in a survival bunker playing Fallout 4 until my toenails burrow through my Chuck Taylors.

Thank you, Adam Schiff, for all you do. If only the ocher abomination had the sense to listen to you.

Is Trump still chafing your arse-cheeks? Then Dear F*cking Lunatic: 101 Obscenely Rude Letters to Donald Trump and its boffo sequels Dear Pr*sident A**clown: 101 More Rude Letters to Donald Trump and Dear F*cking Moron: 101 More Letters to Donald Trump by Aldous J. Pennyfarthing are the pick-me-up you need! Reviewers have called these books “hysterically funny,” “cathartic,” and “laugh-out-loud” comic relief. And they’re way, way cheaper than therapy.