Ever wanted to know what it would be like to be with a Silurian? Have you fantasized about getting it on with a green skinned Orion slave or the blue skinned Neytiri ‘ from ‘Avatar?’ Maybe something a little rougher is what you’re into that only a female Klingon can provide? Then head to Nevada because soon you can experience the joy of coupling with your favorite female alien at the State’s newest themed brothel, Area 51 Alien Cathouse.

If Geek Love speed dating isn’t “interactive” enough for you, Dennis Hof hopes that his newest business venture will tempt you into the titillating possibilities of going where no man has ever gone before (um…not literally). You may recognize Hof from the HBO show ‘Moonlite Bunny Ranch.’ He obviously knows his clientele as Area 51 Alien Cathouse will make this the fifth brothel he owns, the most ever by a single owner according to the Las Vegas Review Journal.

The alien-themed brothel will be located 90 miles northwest of Las Vegas on Highway 95 just south of a federal military base formally known as the Nevada Test Site. Hof purchased the rundown bordello and the area around it and plans to renovate the area and rename it the Area 51 Alien Travel Center. The center will not only feature the brothel, but also a bar, convenience store, and even have its own line of merchandise with little green men and women logos upon them. Hof added, ‘I am designing a complete alien store focusing on jerky, fruit, hot sauces and candy and everything alien. I am excited about my newest project.”

Hof is calling his Alien Cathouse a place promising “girls from another world” and has enlisted the help of Hollywood Madam herself, Heidi Fleiss, to help with the costume and décor. “She’s the chief alien design queen,” he said. There definitely will be alien costumes made for employees at the travel center and especially for the women in the brothel (I can already image which place gets the Princess Leia bikini costume!), but whether or not the costumes will be for everyday use or only for promotional events and special occasions is still being decided. Another issue being considered is whether the bodies of the “working girls” will be entirely painted for that alien look.

The Alien Cathouse is expected to open for business in a month or two and all rooms at the new place will be spacious suites for all to enjoy (thus bringing new meaning to the Doctor Who phrase “it’s bigger on the inside”). “Unless they’re married,” Hof says with a laugh, “I don’t want anyone in Nevada having sex unless I get a cut of the money.”

Nevada is the only state that allows cathouses and Hof obviously feels that the Area 51 Alien Cathouse is filling a black hole not yet explored.

While this site neither endorses the business nor condones the activity, I do feel the need to have to take a shower right about now.