But I had not reckoned that what would be truly difficult was being an unmarried man, especially an unmarried man living part of the time on his own, away from family. That was what was regarded as profoundly abnormal. And I wearily had to come out about the lack of a “Madam” all the time. My banker wanted to know if “Madam” also needed to open a new account. The water filter service man said breezily that, even I was not at home, he could install the water filter as long as “Madam” was around.