Man Arrested For Sabotaging Air Conditioning During Game 1 of NBA Finals

SAN ANTONIO, Texas –

UPDATE: The validity of this article could not be confirmed. According to the San Antonio Spurs, no one named Brendan Kelly was working as a contractor during this time.

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Brendan Kelly, a mechanical contractor working at the AT&T center, was arrested today after security footage showed him tampering with the air conditioning unit during game 1 of the NBA finals. Kelly, a die-hard Spurs fan, was quoted as saying he thought that sabotaging the air conditioning would make it extremely difficult for the Spurs’ opponents, the Miami Heat, to play, thus making him a fortune with his bookie.

“I just wanted to give my boys an edge, and I saw a perfect opportunity here.” Kelly said during a police interview. “Nothing wrong with making a little scratch on a game, right?”

The heat inside the AT&T Center had reached almost 90 degrees by the end of the third quarter, and not only was it taking a toll on the Heat, causing star player LeBron James to sit out part of the the game with cramps caused by dehydration, it wasn’t doing any favors for the Spurs, either.

“I don’t think I’ve ever played in anything like this since I left the islands,” said Tim Duncan, center for the Spurs and a native of St. Croix in the U.S. Virgin Islands.

Despite complaints from everyone in the building, referees and coaches were never consulted about stopping the game. According to Rod Thorn, Vice President of Operations for the NBA, because players were not “slipping on condensation,” there was never any talk during the game of stopping play.

“We rarely would stop a game, especially in the playoffs.” Said Thorne.

Official word from representatives for the AT&T Center was that their system was just malfunctioning. Now that Kelly has been arrested for the tampering, they have backpedaled in their stance on the matter.

“We were under the assumption that our air conditioning system was malfunctioning, and that was our initial report.” Said Raymond McNeil, director of the AT&T Center. “With Mr. Kelly being taken into police custody, we are supporting them in any way we can to make sure he is prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.”

Kelly is being charged with 1st degree vandalism and placing illegal bets on a sports game, both felonies in the state of Texas.