Get ready for the Richard Keys Invitational on 26 November. With David Moyes pitching up at West Ham United’s training ground and getting ready to bring in Stuart Pearce as an assistant, Everton are preparing to announce Sam Allardyce as their new manager. And note the date in the diary: it’s Big Sam versus the Chosen One at Goodison Park at the end of the month, the two erstwhile beIN Sport studio guests locking horns against their former sides. It’s sure to be a cracker!

West Ham United appoint David Moyes as new manager Read more

José Mourinho has had enough of David de Gea making Manchester United look better than they actually are. The goalkeeper will be allowed to join Real Madrid in the summer, but only if Raphaël Varane is lobbed in the other direction. United did sign a new centre-back a couple of months ago, but Victor Lindelof’s duties now extend no further than cleaning Mourinho’s car every morning.

Arsène Wenger wants Barcelona’s Rafinha, who’s a gnarly, cussed, no-nonsense leg-breaker in the mould of Vinnie Jones. His nickname at the Camp Nou is El Chopper. Not really. He’s actually a creative midfielder. Juventus aren’t planning to sign anyone in January, which means that Liverpool can relax about Emre Can. Meanwhile Virgil van Dijk says that he is “happy” and “giving 100%” at Southampton. Notice, though, that he isn’t giving 110%.

Paris Saint-Germain’s Thomas Meunier has cruelly let the world know that he snubbed Chelsea in the summer. “I could have left for Chelsea on the final day of the transfer window,” the right-back said. “But I didn’t want to join them. I am happy at PSG and I don’t want to leave.” Well! Can someone check that Chelsea are OK? That’s a low blow on a Tuesday morning. Chelsea are consoling themselves by keeping tabs on Lyon’s Mouctar Diakhaby, although Juventus and Manchester City are also interested in the centre-back.