Re:Catching up

Yang Xiao Long (Fireballin17)

to me | 10:32 AM (7 hours ago)

I'm really glad you're feeling good. I wish I could say the same, frankly. I'm already feeling like this drive is cursed or something. I woke up late with my stomach feeling worse than last night and I made it less than an hour out of Joliet before I had to stop again. I'm in a city called Ottowa now, bumming off the city wifi. I think I'm going to try and rest here until I'm feeling better, as much as it pains me to lose a whole day of driving.

You know, on paper, 35 hours doesn't look like a lot. I mean, it's more than a day, sure, but you just think 'man, a day and a half and then I'll be home.' But then you gotta think how long you can actually go in a day (my record is 12 hours btw, but I had a LOT of caffeine that day and it got rough there at the end) and then add 6-8 hours every time you stop for sleep and whatnot. Suddenly, home starts looking very, very far away.

I don't know why I'm getting all weird and mopey coming home. It's not like I don't want to see you, or dad, or Ruby. I honestly don't even want to be here right now, out driving and wandering. It lost its romance. It kind of just feels like this little black raincloud is following me around, like I'm in a cartoon or something, just sort of weighing on me and making me feel like crap for no adequately explained reason.

Ugh, sorry, I'll try to stop being a total downer for a few minutes here. You wanted a story, right? Well, I'm not the world's best storyteller, but I'll try.

Leaving Detroit was a little surreal. It's such a huge city, alive with noise and traffic and all the things that come with modern life, but just a few miles down I-94, it just...stops. Once you're out past the suburbs and the places that exist to support the suburbs, you're in a forest. It reminds me of back home a little, where you feel like if you just pulled over and wandered off into the trees, you'd wind up in some kind of fantasy world after a bit. At some point, my map told me I was driving beside one of the Great Lakes, Lake Michigan, obviously, but I couldn't see it through the trees. It took a while, but eventually a combination of the highway going up a hill and a gap in the foliage let me see it.

Remember that summer I took (okay, dragged) you to the music festival in San Diego? I wanted to go to the beach one more time before we went home, and so we went around mid morning even though the clouds were rolling in and the thunder had scared off most of the beach goers? Well, imagine if we'd had to walk through the enchanted forest before we'd seen that. The steely grey sky, the water still calm before the storm. It was a lot like that. I pulled over and took a few pictures, I'll show you when I get back.

I miss you like crazy.

We really should go on a trip sometime. It doesn't have to be like what I did. We can plan a route, a destination, a reasonable time frame etc. etc. But you need to be out here. When I hit what I can definitively say was the midwest, and the trees turned into rolling farmland literally as far as the eye can see, all I could think was no words I used to describe it would be able to do it justice. But you could. I've always loved your writing, and with some of the things I've seen for inspiration, I think you could make something amazing.

Have you been writing at all in the clinic? I know it can't be the most inspiring place in the world, but I know it makes you happy.

I think I'm going to try and get some rest now. I don't want to lose much more time. Best to just get over this thing so I can come home.

Re:Catching up

Yang Xiao Long (Fireballin17)

to me | 2:54 PM (3 hours ago)

Somethings not right. I cant sleep, been staring at the roof of my station wagon for like 4 hours now. My stomachs killing me. And now im sweating, too. I think its got to be a fever, but i dont feel hot. Weird, right?

What was i thinking coming out here blake? No plan, no nothing. Just another stupid impulse. I almost lost everything, and now im hurting too much to even get my useless ass home.

I think im really sick. Defeated by the fucking stomach flu.

Im sorry for all the shit i keep putting you through. I promise ill make it home, as soon as i can.

I love you.

If my heart was a compass you'd be north

Sent from: Ottawa Illinois