Ahh the Black dick joke- the one racial joke that’s guaranteed to get a laugh no matter who tells it. The most positive stereotype on earth, the time for white women to let loose, and well here I am. I’m the guy from the Black dick jokes.

I know you didn’t think we were real people. We try to stay pretty lowkey but it’s about time I spoke out. The jokes can be funny, but I have to say we’re way more than 8.5 inches. Yeah, I’m down to hook up if you are but learn something else about me first. For example I’m a great cook, my salmon cheddar jalapeno sandwiches on sourdough will knock your socks off.

Learn about how the different experiences and time I’ve spent on this earth have made me the person that I am, just like how 15 minutes is all you need to make those salmon cheddar jalapeno sandwiches what they are. Sorry, I’m kinda caught up on those sandwiches huh? Learn about my philosophies on life, learn about my religion or lack thereof. “No pork on my fork” is a common refrain for us, spiritual or atheist, though bacon does go great with cheddar. Gotta say I’m obsessed with this recipe - it’s to die for.

What I’m trying to say here is think of us as fully realized human beings with emotions, ideas, desires, dreams. We’re more than just our body parts, more than just our ability to satisfy with our perceived sexual dynamism. We’re real people and some of us are struggling amateur Internet chefs too so please, please, please make those sandwiches and leave me a review. I need this.