by the Bonk's Mullet Staff

are too lazy to write something today

jason spezza walks into a bar (day-to-day)

— Chet Sellers (@chet_sellers) October 7, 2013

DJ Z-BAD sits distraught at his locker. A hand touches his shoulder reassuringly. "Drop passes, not the beat.", says Captain Spezza. #Sens

— Luke Peristy (@LukePeristy) September 30, 2013

@chet_sellers Alfie walks into a bar tells everyone he loves the bar and always will then proceeds to leave for a fancy older bar.

— Don in Oakville (@Don_inOakville) October 7, 2013

Gov is removing my adult privileges after some ignoramus filmed me singing "Brad Boyes" to the tune of Bad Boys as I traded for him in NHL14

— Boochenski (@Brochenski) October 1, 2013

Q: "Why did Jagr sign with New Jersey in the summer?" A: "He needed a......new jersey" Yeaahhhhhh!!!! #CSIMIAMGUI pic.twitter.com/S8i0b5q4RO

— Capital Gains (@Capital_Gains65) October 8, 2013

@chet_sellers Final game of the playoffs. Chris Phillips accidentally walks into the wrong bar

— Boochenski (@Brochenski) October 8, 2013

"pesky" is so 2012-13. i want 2013-14 to be "turnt up" because i wanna hear paul maclean say it

— Chet Sellers (@chet_sellers) October 10, 2013

@chet_sellers Cory Conacher isn't allowed in a bar unless he's accompanied by an adult.

— Katia (@sensbiscuit) October 7, 2013

"I'm rich as hell and I'll pay whatever as long as it works" - Erik Karlsson on Bell and antler spray

— Steve On Sens (@SteveOnSens) October 1, 2013

@chet_sellers Mel Bridgman walks into a bar, tries to order a drink that's not on the list. Ottawa apologizes.

— Thierry (@tcote) October 7, 2013

Stephane Da Costa looks like a really high quality photoshop of a baby playing hockey. #analysis pic.twitter.com/FrsFuaez3T

— Bonk's Mullet (@BonksMullet) September 29, 2013

@chet_sellers Matt Chouinard walks into a bar for the second time that night

— Boochenski (@Brochenski) October 7, 2013

somewhere in switzerland, latendresse wakes up to another rich breakfast of waffles, pastries and nutella. "gluten morgen," he sighs happily

— Chet Sellers (@chet_sellers) October 8, 2013

@chet_sellers Pascal Leclaire walks into a bar; is injured by Mike Fisher doing shots one table over.

— Luke Peristy (@LukePeristy) October 7, 2013

sens r cool leafs r poo *money rains down from the sky*

— Boochenski (@Brochenski) October 5, 2013

@chet_sellers Kaspars Daugavins spins into a bar.

— Steven McGunnigle (@ste_mc_efc) October 7, 2013

@chet_sellers Joe Corvo keeps on going to the same bars.

— Michael Slavitch (@kerfluffer) October 7, 2013

Poor Dany Heatley, nothing more than a pinball flipper at this point in his career.

— The 6th Sens (@6thSens) October 10, 2013

@chet_sellers Curtis Lazar has never walked into a bar

— Paul (@Sens_Army_) October 7, 2013

Spezza's out for ONE GAME and Phillips is already campaigning to replace him. #exploreAlberta pic.twitter.com/neqyFgzKSt

— Bonk's Mullet (@BonksMullet) October 10, 2013

"Get Lucky" playing in ACC. Also happens to be how the Leafs made the playoffs last year *gets showered in jewels and gold*

— Boochenski (@Brochenski) October 5, 2013

We're introducing a new weekly feature here at the Mullet! Because wewant to recognize the hilarity of our fellow Sens fans, we're going to be compiling some of Twitter's best zingers and delivering them to you in convenient digest form. Catch up on what you missed or experience the laughs all over again! Let's go! Warning: Shameless homerism.