U2 is one of the biggest bands in the world, but self-identifying as a U2 fan is another thing entirely. As a self-identified U2 fan, I can tell you: You get shit on. Constantly.

And I understand why! Even at the best of times, an aging rock band is rarely considered cool—and that’s not even counting Spider-Man: Turn Off the Dark, or that free album that made everybody so mad for some reason. [Ed note: Apple had to release special instructions to remove it!]

But as a stalwart U2 fan, here is my solemn vow: If you’re willing to keep an open mind, you can learn to love U2 too! So let’s dig in:

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Bono is super annoying, right?

Many people think so!

Why does he wear those goofy sunglasses all the time?

Because he has glaucoma. Now who’s the asshole?

Okay, okay. But what about all the political shit?

I don’t know. I have a hard time getting mad at Bono for trying to battle the AIDS crisis, end global poverty, or lobby on behalf of refugees. Your mileage may vary.

But I get it! You’re here to listen to music, not get a lecture. So whatever Bono baggage you’re carrying into this article, just pretend you have no idea who he is.

So tell me about U2’s music.

It’s… hard to summarize! Part of the fun of listening to a band that’s been around for 40 years is watching them experiment with the musical trends of each era. After recording a few albums in one style, U2 tends to pivot to a different kind of music—sometimes subtly, and sometimes radically. It’s difficult to generalize about a band with so many diverse styles and influences—and every album features at least one song that’s a total departure from the median—but here’s a broadly accurate primer of what you can expect from U2’s discography:

Boy, October, and War are spiky, energetic, and often political forays into the post-punk scene.

The Unforgettable Fire, The Joshua Tree, and Rattle & Hum are roots-y, soaring explorations of America, as filtered through the eyes of some young and increasingly famous Irish dudes.

Achtung Baby, Zooropa, and Pop are artsier, more experimental fusions of rock with pop and electronic/dance music.

All That You Can’t Leave Behind, How to Dismantle an Atomic Bomb, and No Line on the Horizon are loaded with unapologetically crowd-pleasing rock anthems, to increasingly diminishing returns.

Songs of Innocence and Songs of Experience are an ambitious, personal, and not entirely successful effort to synthesize the band’s personal history and career-spanning passions into a kind of two-part concept album.

Jesus. Where should I start?

It depends on how deep you want to go! If you have iTunes, you already own Songs of Innocence (and probably whined about it). But that’s not a great starting point. There are a few reasonably comprehensive greatest hits albums. If you want to go down that route, I’d recommend The Best of 1980-1990 and The Best of 1990-2000, which are both available on Spotify.

But full disclosure: If you stick to the compilations, you’re going to hear a lot of songs you’ve already heard before.

If I turn on the radio and hear "I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For" or "Beautiful Day" one more time, I will go insane.

I agree! I mean, I like those songs—and most of U2’s other big mainstream hits—but years of consistent rotation on Top 40 stations has made them completely insufferable. So if you’re willing to keep an open mind, here are a few slightly deeper cuts I’d recommend:

"A Sort of Homecoming"

This wistful, poetic song opens up The Unforgettable Fire, setting the stage for a new musical direction. It’s become a cliche to describe U2’s music as "uplifting"—but it’s a label the band earns with "A Sort of Homecoming," which captures both the turmoil and the premature nostalgia of young adulthood.

"Red Hill Mining Town"

You already know the hits from The Joshua Tree, but the album’s lesser-known back half is just as strong. My favorite is "Red Hill Mining Town," a sprawling and nostalgic tribute to the people caught up in a miners’ strike. The climax of the song finds Bono hitting notes so high that he couldn’t reach them consistently in live performances, resulting in the song being shelved on tours for 30 years. When they finally played it last year… well, there weren’t any dry eyes in my section of the stadium.

"Acrobat"

One of the darkest songs from U2’s darkest album, "Acrobat" finds Bono repeatedly snarling "Don’t let the bastards grind you down" over a chaotic, disorienting riff by lead guitarist The Edge. If you want the full effect, listen to it in the context of the album, which places "Acrobat" as the middle of a three-song movement that begins with "Ultraviolet (Light My Way)" and ends with the album closer "Love is Blindness."

"Please"

The industrial chaos of Pop finally reaches a kind of catharsis in the aching, stripped-down chorus of "Please," which is the standout track on an unjustly overlooked album. The lyrics, which churn U2’s pet obsessions with the personal and the political into a dizzying blend, might be the logical culmination of everything the band has written.

"Raised By Wolves"

Here’s the best song from that free album you complained about! This is a weird little nerve-jangler in the "Sunday Bloody Sunday” vein, with a jangly guitar riff completed by keyboards and a strange vocal effect that sounds like huffing and puffing. Bono’s best lyrics are grounded in reality, and this recollection of an IRA bombing in his neighborhood could hardly be more specific; he even recites the license plate on a car used in the attack.

"Native Son"

This an early version of the song that would eventually became the mega-hit "Vertigo," with a totally different vocal track (and without unos dos tres catorce). Many pretentious U2 fans prefer this to "Vertigo." I’m one of them!

Wait a second. Aren’t you a U2 super-fan? Don’t you just love everything they do?

No. Here’s the secret to loving U2: You’re going to hate some stuff. At 14 albums (and a slew of EPs and rarities and remixes), there’s just too much material for everything to work for every listener. For example: I am sorry to report that I am no fan of Songs of Experience, U2’s most recent album, which contains some of the most embarrassing lyrics Bono has ever written.

But if you take a deep enough dive, you’ll also find under-appreciated stuff you’ll want to champion. 1997’s Pop—an underperforming and often criticized album that saw the band dabbling in techno and electronica—has a cult of defenders loyal enough to declare it U2’s best album ever. There are U2 devotees who swear by Original Soundtracks 1, a weird and commercially unsuccessful collaboration between the band and Brian Eno. And I think 2014’s Songs of Innocence, which was dinged for that controversial iTunes release strategy, is the best thing U2 has put out in more than 20 years.

The fun part of being a U2 fan is figuring out which parts of U2 you like—and, of course, trading and debating lists of favorites/least favorites with other U2 devotees. That’s the joy of the decades-old, absurdly comprehensive fansite @U2, or the podcast U Talkin’ U2 To Me, in which Adam Scott and Scott Aukerman alternate between arguing about U2 and spouting gibberish.

So here’s my real advice: Listen to U2’s entire discography, in chronological order, and figure out which version of the band you like best. (I even made a playlist to help you do it!) This band has recorded so many songs, and played around with so many styles of music, that you’ll inevitably find something you like.

[Listens to U2 for 12 hours] It worked! I love U2 now! So what’s next?

I don’t want to be that guy who’s always talking about how you have to see some band live—but dude, you have to see U2 live. Even detractors have generally acknowledged that U2’s command of stagecraft, as pioneered by designer Willie Williams, is unsurpassed by basically any band in history—a particularly impressive feat when you’re playing to tens of thousands in sold-out stadiums.

Unfortunately, you just missed the chance to see The Joshua Tree Tour 2017, which offered a pretty remarkable career retrospective for the 30th anniversary of the band’s most acclaimed album. U2 just kicked off the North American leg of the Experience + Innocence Tour, which is heavier on the new stuff, but still worth attending.

And if you’re willing to settle for YouTube, here are a few choice clips:

The 1985 performance of "Bad" at Live Aid, which launched them to a new level of fame when the performance went insanely long and Bono hugged somebody:

The Rattle & Hum version of "Pride (in the Name of Love)," which is the rare live track that’s better than the studio version:

The Super Bowl halftime show in 2002, which—with apologies to Prince—is still my favorite:

And you can’t write about U2’s live performances without at least mentioning MacPhisto, Bono’s singularly bizarre alter ego. During the now-legendary Zoo TV Tour, Bono played several oddball characters designed to lampoon a celebrity-worshipping culture. The best-remembered is MacPhisto, a smirky little devil who made terrible jokes and placed live crank calls to people like Margaret Thatcher and the Pope:

MacPhisto hasn’t been seen in a while, but there are rumors Bono plans to bring him back for the Experience + Innocence Tour. Fingers crossed!

Okay, I need a palate cleanser. What are your favorite U2 songs and albums?

I’m so glad you asked! These are my top five U2 albums:

Achtung Baby The Joshua Tree The Unforgettable Fire War Songs of Innocence

And I can’t possibly rank the songs—but if you’re really interested, here’s a career-spanning playlist of 71 personal favorites. And I’ll give a special shoutout to "Hold Me Thrill Me Kiss Me Kill Me," the first U2 song I can specifically remember hearing, which I loved so much I recorded the music video from my TV speakers because I couldn’t afford the Batman Forever soundtrack.

One last question: What the hell was up with that Spider-Man musical?

Hey, I never claimed to have all the answers.