Church Unveils New Full-Body Massage Pews

RALEIGH, NC—“It’s all about treating our guests like they deserve to be treated.”

That’s the philosophy behind Journey Together Church’s newest visitor-centric feature which they announced Friday—deluxe, full-body massage pews in the front row of the sanctuary.

The impressive, highly configurable chairs will knead, roll, or tap-massage churchgoers from their heads to the soles of their feet as they sip their drinks from Journey Together’s highly-acclaimed café and listen to a positive, inspiring message from the stage. All of this combined is sure to make for a relaxing, therapeutic Sunday morning experience.

“We aim to delight all five senses as we treat our guests to a refreshing, comforting church service,” said Lead Pastor Jason Hammond. “We rolled them out first to the front, center row, because we figured those are probably our most loyal customers—but we hope to replace every single pew with a new deluxe massage chair by the end of next year, Lord willing.”

Get Free Access To Our Brand New Site: Not the Bee After creating The Babylon Bee in six literal days, Adam Ford rested. But he rests no longer. Introducing Not the Bee — a brand new humor-based news site run by Adam himself. It's loaded with funny content and all the best features of a social network. And the best part? Everyone with a subscription to The Bee gets full access at no extra cost. Get FREE Access *with premium subscription to The Babylon Bee