Having kids sort of sucked the joy out of mealtime for me. It meant no longer focusing on myself and my own food. I now had the full time job of cutting up meat, cleaning up spills, and trying to have an adult conversation over the din of childish chatter. The thought of having a leisurely meal was laughable, and rather discouraging to boot.

But several years ago, I was blessed to learn from another family what taking leisurely meals with a lot of little ones actually looked like. It was like a ray of sunshine in my day! I realized I really could have a wonderful mealtime with my family, but it would mean letting go of a few preconceived notions and a whole lot of anxiety.

A glimpse of Heaven…

When we sit down to fellowship over food with our family, we need to keep in mind that this is a foretaste of our fellowship in Heaven. Things are not perfect here, but they can still give us an idea of what we can expect when we are truly Home.

Start the meal calmly…

It is so easy to start a meal with chaos. It happens all the time here. If we don’t all sit down together, take a deep breath, and thank the Lord for His provisions, we end up resembling pigs at a feed trough! Don’t expect a meal to be leisurely if you don’t begin it that way. And if it does begin in chaos, it is never too late (unless someone has left the table) to start over. Have everyone put their forks down, take a deep breath, and begin anew.

Be aware of your surroundings…

Sometimes we forget to even look up from our food, let alone take the time to notice and engage the other people at the table. When you eat with adults, conversation typically naturally flows, but it isn’t the norm at a table full of hungry little people and tired parents. You have to make the effort to look up from your food and smile at everyone seated with you. Start with the littlest one and work your way up. Ask each child a question or simply smile at them. This is the start to healthy dinner conversations.

Expect mishaps…

Because this is not a perfect world, we need to expect mishaps and be as prepared for them as we can be. Have a towel handy for cleaning up spills, and try to take the attitude that the little mishaps in life are not something to dwell on and fuss over. Remember, a word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver (Proverbs 25:11) – in other words, speaking calmly and kindly when mishaps occur is a thing of priceless beauty. Don’t let your words be ugly over something as minor as spilled drinks, dropped forks, and the like.

Learn to be still…

This isn’t just for wiggly little boys, this is for wiggly mamas who jump up and head off to the next thing on her list after wolfing down the last bite on her plate. Train yourself to stay seated after you are finished, or better yet, slow down your eating altogether. Give your brain a moment to relax. Put your fork down, take a deep breath, and wait. You might even want to bring a book to the table that you can use as a read-aloud at the end of the meal to help everyone stay in their seats and learn to be still during mealtime.

Feast & fellowship…

We don’t often think of eating with our family as a time of feasting and fellowship, but it truly is! It is a time to reconnect after everyone has been about their own business during the day. It is a time for you to share and for you to listen as others share about their day. It should be fun! It should be a celebration!

That’s where my free gift to you comes in…

Our family has compiled 33 Family Dinner Games that don’t require a ton of forethought and preparation. You can print out the list and instructions, and keep it handy in your dining room. Each game spans multiple ages and encourages an open and festive atmosphere for your meals!

Get your Family Dinner Games >>

Now, go and give those babies a big hug and kiss, do the same with your husband, and welcome them all to family mealtime tonight!