The Eggman

By David Futrelle

Yesterday afternoon, the Alt-Rightish YouTube “philosopher” Stefan Molyneux decided that the world needed to hear his thoughts on Taylor Swift’s eggs. Not her egg salad recipe (if she has one) or her favorite way to prepare an omelette. Her eggs eggs. The ones inside her body.

So he tweeted this:

https://twitter.com/StefanMolyneux/status/1204194224545173504

And with this tweet, Stefan managed to squick out roughly half of the internet. The tweet is like some sort of icky onion: every layer is icky right down to its core. There’s the spectacle of a fiftysomething man offering his unasked-for thoughts on the reproductive anatomy of a woman young enough to be his daughter. There’s his attempt to use biology to push his agenda of pushing young women out of the workforce and back into the home. There’s that bit at the end about her potentially being a “fun mom.” There’s the smiley at the end. There’s the weird stench of horniness that permeates the whole tweet.

I could go on. But — as you’ll see if you look at the responses to that tweet — many others already have, sometimes hilariously so. And while Taylor Swift herself hasn’t responded to Stefan and his admittedly strange concerns, the Daily Beast notes, she has addressed the topic more broadly, telling People magazine that

people who ask the questions at parties like ‘When are you going to start a family’ to someone as soon as they turn 25 are a little bit rude. It’s good that we’re allowed to say, ‘Hey, just so you know, we’re more than incubators.’ You don’t have to ask that of someone just because they’re in their mid-20s and they’re a female.

Upon discovering this, Stefan’s “concern” for her turned into anger.

https://twitter.com/StefanMolyneux/status/1204306230841368577

This isn’t Stefan’s first Egg Rodeo. Indeed, he’s posted about women’s eggs many times in the past — sometimes accusingly, sometimes gloatingly, and sometimes with false concern — in an attempt to chide the egg-havers into retreating from the workplace and devoting their twenties to babies, babies and more babies.

Here he cites selective facts in an attempt to scare women into making babies before it’s “too late.”

https://twitter.com/StefanMolyneux/status/1156045438484697095

https://twitter.com/StefanMolyneux/status/1156778980713934848

https://twitter.com/StefanMolyneux/status/1156248002769707015

In the interest of fairness, I should note that Stefan has also pointed out that sperm quality declines with age as well — though his preferred solution for men is to freeze their sperm for later use, not to give up the idea of a career in their twenties. (He would also prefer that young men not smoke pot lest it make their sperm lazy.)

But Stefan’s alleged “concerns” about women are skin-deep; he’s just as likely to mock older women without children for having “old” eggs as he is to express his weird “sympathy” for younger women whom he fears will end up “wasting” their young eggs.

https://twitter.com/StefanMolyneux/status/1115794357401993216

https://twitter.com/StefanMolyneux/status/1167902913626132485

Here he mocks women with the temerity to take on debt in order to get an education:

https://twitter.com/StefanMolyneux/status/1098446897767866368

Here he suggests that women who don’t have kids young will end up getting eaten by their cats:

https://twitter.com/StefanMolyneux/status/1075556315399901185

He just seems to hate older women in general:

https://twitter.com/StefanMolyneux/status/1186793390974947330

https://twitter.com/StefanMolyneux/status/1156246365669928960

It seems highly unlikely that Stefan will manage to avoid posting equally cringeworthy and terrible thoughts about women’s eggs in the future. No amount of criticism on this front seems to faze him. He doesn’t even bother to respond to most of it .

But there’s one egg-related topic that seems to genuinely bother him: the degree to which his own head resembles an egg.

https://twitter.com/StefanMolyneux/status/1075980243599388672

Perhaps more “modern Oscar Wildes” offering similar insights into Stafan’s big eggy head could deter him from making quite so many egg-related tweets in the future.

Send tips to dfutrelle at gmail dot com.

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