WASHINGTON—after yesterday’s McCutcheon ruling eliminated caps on campaign contributions, environmentalists warned that America’s corruption reserves, once thought to be virtually unlimited, could be exhausted as soon as 2030.

“The rate of depletion is going to increase substantially,” said David Brown of the Sierra Club. “Already, some of the largest deposits in easy-to-mine areas such as the White House and Senate are virtually gone.”

According to a batch of recently released studies, lobbyists desperate to replace their proven reserves are now exploring in difficult areas such as local sheriffs and county commissioners, as well as looking at alternatives such as the media.

The Federal Election Commission, fresh off its loss in the McCutcheon case, announced that it would “accept the new landscape” and would soon announce changed regulations for what would now be called the 2016 Pepsi Challenge Presidential Primary.