What does conservative columnist and former Reagan aide Douglas MacKinnon see when he surveys the current state of affairs? A world, he says, that's been "turned upside down if you do believe in traditional values." Just look, for instance, at those uppity gays and their demand for equal treatment.

"If you happen to refuse to bake a cake for a gay couple because it goes against your religious beliefs, you can be driven out of business," MacKinnon told right-wing radio host Janet Mefferd yesterday. "If you’re a football commentator and you happen to just say innocently that maybe I wouldn’t have drafted a gay football player because I wouldn’t want to deal with the distraction, many people on the left will try to drive you out of your job as well."

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So what's a God-fearing, gun-toting, gay-loathing supporter of traditional values to do? It's time, MacKinnon argues, to start thinking about drastic measures. The author was on Mefferd's program to promote his new book, "The Secessionist States of America: The Blueprint for Creating a Traditional Values County ... Now." You can guess what he proposes.

Now hold your horses there, MacKinnon says: He's only talking about secession as part of an "academic" exercise. He just wants his dear readers to think about what a "Duck Dynasty"-watching, Cracker Barrel-patronizing, skeet-shooting republic with NO GAYS ALLOWED would look like.

MacKinnon reckons that we don't need all of the former Confederate states to secede for this purely hypothetical, totally academic, completely theoretical project to work.

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"We look at what states would be viable in terms of doing something like this. In fact, what states would provide sort of the new landmass for a new republic dedicated to traditional values. And the consensus was that the three best states in the union would be South Carolina, Georgia, and Florida," MacKinnon told Mefferd, citing the states' population, natural resources, infrastructure and proximity to the Atlantic Ocean and Gulf of Mexico.

No Texas? There's reason enough for that, MacKinnon explains.

"[T]here have been a number of incursions into Texas and other places from some of the folks in Mexico," he said.

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Remember, now: We're only talking hypotheticals here. But MacKinnon is willing to consider the possibility of this actually happening -- and he's even got a name for the new country in mind.

"If it moves beyond the academic, then it’s one of those things, too, where obviously now – in the age of instant communication – the world would also know about this country," MacKinnon said. "The interim name for the country, by the way, is Reagan."

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OK, but didn't we fight a Civil War over this kind of thing? Relax, MacKinnon assured Mefferd. "The eyes of the world would be watching" how the U.S. government responded to the Republic of Reagan's formation, so Dictator Nobama won't be launching a Second War of Northern Aggression.

So dare to dream, culture warriors. Picture a country where tyrannical homosexuals don't insist on "rights" and "equality," ketchup is a vegetable, and the kids Just Say No.

Listen to MacKinnon discuss the Republic of Reagan below, courtesy of RightWingWatch, which also has other clips from MacKinnon's interview: