The menu describes the meat as “72-hour brisket.”

OK.

Fifty percent to 60 percent of what I eat never makes it to print. I write mostly about those discoveries that I enjoy and want to share. That’s the goal, after all. I spare the gnarly details of much of what I eat, even if most of what I reject isn’t exactly gross. I want to tell you where to eat, not where not to eat.

Every once in a while, though, I do eat something I wish I could give back — like the “barbecue” brisket at the newly opened Left Coast Brewing Co. in Irvine. This is the second outpost of Left Coast Brewing. The original resides in San Clemente. But this is the first location with a full kitchen and food menu, for which they’ve chosen barbecue as a theme. Barbecue should be the perfect complement to a great lineup of beers.

If only.

The beers are great. But trust me: Do not eat here. The barbecue is genuinely wretched. The menu states that the brisket is cooked for 72 hours, which is, I suppose, interesting. But cooked how? Sous vide? Boiled? It is certainly not barbecued. This is how I imagine 3-D printed meat might taste if the printer were running low on toner.

If it tastes of anything, the closest comparison might be amateur corned beef. But that’s too generous a comparison. It’s as if the beef has been floating in a hot tub for 72 hours until every ounce of flavor has been leached from it, leaving behind a sterilized spongy mass with the faint flavor of latex gloves. The fat on barbecued brisket should melt in your mouth, not bounce between your teeth like a rubber band. The meat’s weird texture allows it to be sliced like bacon. This is a crime against the entire universe of barbecue.

Opening a restaurant is hard, I know. Most new restaurants go through a period of recipe testing. I can’t imagine the recipes that must have been rejected before someone tasted this version and said, “Yes, that’s it. We have a winner!”

No amount of sauce, delicious or not, can save this travesty. It is easily the worst thing I’ve eaten this year.

On a positive note, the cornbread and the pickle were both delightful.

Left Coast Brewing Co.

Where: 6652 Irvine Center Dr., Irvine

When: Lunch and dinner daily

Cost: $18.99

Phone: 949-387-5170

Online: leftcoastbrewing.com