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This week has been the tale of three men – Donald Trump, Boris Johnson and Gareth Southgate.

One found a way to make his country great again. And two are giant blond babies full of hot air who aren’t fit to do up the buttons on the England manager’s waistcoat.

Into the nation’s collective hangover yesterday stepped the brashest man on the planet, ready to pick over the bones of Brexit.

Make no mistake, Donald Trump is not here to celebrate the NHS’s 70th birthday. Not intent on just ­dismantling Obamacare, Trump has set his sights on our National Health Service too.

(Image: Getty)

Flying a 20-foot balloon of the tweeting Trump Baby is the least we could do to welcome his greedy ­cavalcade to London.

US big pharma – which bankrolls the Republican Party – views the NHS as a barely exploited “goldmine” as the Tories lay it open to more and more private ownership.

How tempting would it be as the Government unravels to offer up the glittering prize of the NHS for saving our Brexit bacon. And no wonder Theresa May refused point blank to guarantee protection for the NHS back in February during any bilateral trade talks with the US.

Meanwhile, new Health Secretary Matt Hancock turns out to be just the man for the job.

While all perfectly legal, he’s received £32,000 in ­donations from the chairman of a think tank, the Institute of Economic Affairs, that wants the NHS abolished.

It’s not just that Trump will be looking for access to the NHS as part of any trade deal. He’s also made no secret of his desire to end caps on pharmaceutical prices, or his rage against the way the NHS is able to set drug prices by trusts acting together.

(Image: Getty)

In May, Trump blamed high US drug prices on “freeloading” nations that used their bargaining power to force US pharmaceutical firms into giving them pills and treatments at low cost. And the US health secretary Alex Azar has admitted they would use trade negotiations to put pressure on countries with “socialised” health care systems.

Trump deliberately misunderstood the massive UK demonstrations in support of the NHS during the winter crisis, tweeting that “the Democrats are pushing for universal health care while thousands of people are marching in the UK because their [universal coverage] system is going broke and not working.”

People were, of course, marching for more funding and support for the NHS, not to get rid of it and set up a private health care system that leaves 28 million people with no health insurance, as they are in the States, and keeps US life ­expectancy below the UK’s.

Brexiteers who claimed that leaving the European Union would avert the EU-US trade agreement, or Transatlantic Trade and Investment Partnership (TTIP), know that actually the US-UK post-Brexit agreements are more than likely to be TTIP max.

It’s not just the NHS that faces this threat – it’s all our public services. The more the Tories lay them open to aggressive privatisation and corporate takeover, the more danger they are in from any bilateral deal with Trump.

As Secretary of State for Trade Liam Fox will know after flicking through the US annual trade “wish list” – the 500-page US Trade Representative – one of America’s priorities is getting rid of “onerous” rules.

Never mind chlorine-washed chickens, these dastardly rules cover everything from animal welfare to chemicals to the import of crops for biofuel. We may think of these rules as basic protections for humans, animals and the planet. The US just thinks they “unnecessarily restrict trade”.

Even our Cornish pasties and Stilton cheese are at risk, as the US wants us to ditch those pesky EU rules around the geographical origins of certain foods.

I would march against Donald Trump any day of the week for the Mexican children he has caged – some of whom, we’re told, after their long separation, can no longer remember their parents. For his vile racist ­politics, his pussy-grabbing ­chauvinism, climate change denial and his hate-filled agenda. For what Trumpism stands for.

But even if you take the view that those things are not our business, you should march today because The Donald’s not here for the heatwave or the soccer or a nice cup of tea.

He’s come here for our pasties, our Stilton – and, most lucrative of all, our NHS.