Welcome to the latest edition of Missed Fists where we shine a light on fights from across the globe that may have been overlooked in these hectic times where it seems like there’s an MMA show every other day.

Since this feature’s inception, we have not once talked about legendary MMA lifer Travis Fulton.

That ends today.

(But first, please make sure to follow the new @GrabakaHitman Twitter account! He has long been an invaluable resource for anyone serious about keeping up with the far reaches of MMA, and if his old account isn’t restored, we can at least help him to build his following again.)

Travis Fulton vs. Shannon Ritch

Ronee Dizon vs. Joe Gustina

AL: 321 vs. 155.

That’s the amount of pro bouts that Travis Fulton and Shannon Ritch brought into their heavyweight meeting at Road to M-1 USA 2 in Winterhaven, Calif., last Thursday. Somehow, this is the first time these two have ever fought.

Numbers 1 and 2.... And it's not really close.#BattleInTheDesert pic.twitter.com/65h4dHEQCJ — UFC FIGHT PASS (@UFCFightPass) April 5, 2019

That’s right, someone finally had the brilliant idea to pair up the two career leaders in MMA appearances (and yes, we’re disregarding Rickson Gracie’s mythical 4000 fights or whatever) and the results were… well, pretty much what you’d expect if you know anything about Fulton and Ritch.

Career win 257 for Travis Fulton!#BattleInTheDesert pic.twitter.com/fB7JcKRT54 — UFC FIGHT PASS (@UFCFightPass) April 5, 2019

After a lively opening round, Fulton put Ritch on his back in round two and slapped on a forearm choke to record his 257th win.

Two hundred. Fifty. Seven.

JM: First off, it was 400 Rickson armbars, thank you very much. Secondly, 257 is a lot of winning, regardless of who it is against. Thirdly, I’m not even gonna treat that forearm choke as if it was real or dangerous. Fourthly, let’s have some fun looking at the records of these two iron men of MMA.

Did you know that Travis Fulton has win streaks of 40, 29, and 24 wins? Or that had he not lost to Mike Whitehead he would have had a 65-fight winning streak at one point?

How about that Fulton’s record against the other iron men is 0-4-4, going 0-3-1 against Dan Severn, 0-1-2 against Jeremy Horn, and 0-0-1 against Ikuhisa Minowa? So this was his first win against a true road warrior of MMA.

What about ol’ Shannon the Cannon? He’s only fought Severn among that illustrious group, and came up short twice. He also has less glamorous streaks than Fulton, having losing skids of 12, 10, and 8.

My favorite part of this whole thing is that Fight Pass only showed the raw number of fights, probably because Ritch’s record is a palindromic 58-85.

MMA is the best.

AL: I’d be remiss if we didn’t mention that another so-called iron man, Travis Wiuff, was on the card. Though I guess his accomplishments pale in comparison given that he only has a ho-hum 99 fights. Step it up, Wiuff! Gotta make triple diggies.

JM: To be fair to Wiuff, he has a 3-0 record against Fulton.

AL: In a perfect world, we someday would have had either Fulton or Ritch (probably Ritch) fight Kimbo Slice, but alas, the Kimbo vs. iron men series will forever remain in the fantasy bin.

Now all the way on the other end of the experience spectrum, we have featherweights Ronee Dizon and Joe Gustina. If Gustina ever wants to become an MMA lifer, he’s going to have to learn that sometimes slamming your way out of a choke just isn’t going to work.

Case in point:

Patience, Jiu Jitsu and the ability to shake off two SLAMS. Classic formula for a 4-0 record!#BattleInTheDesert pic.twitter.com/5c1oXcjWup — UFC FIGHT PASS (@UFCFightPass) April 5, 2019

JM: You totally can slam your way out of chokes. But if you’re gonna do it, you need to make sure your head smashed into the other guy’s chin, a la Rampage.

AL: Are you saying smashing your own head into the canvas, as Gustina did in the first clip, is ineffective?

JM: Oddly, yes, that’s exactly what I’m saying. Just ask Gray Maynard.

Bekulan Saipzhanov vs. Ramzan Bopkhoev

Maksim Kolosov vs. Mikhail Pedko

Anna Emelyanenko vs. Ksenia Stepanova

AL: There were actually two Road to M-1 shows last week, the one in California and one closer to the promotion’s base in Chelyabinks, Russia, on Saturday. Now these cards are supposed be a platform for up-and-coming fighters and if that’s the case, flyweight Bekulan Saipzhanov made a hell of a statement in just his second pro bout:

Tornado kick KO by Bekulan Saipzhan uulu :O

(Road to M-1) pic.twitter.com/75A2g37hj1 — Jolassanda (@Jolassanda) April 6, 2019

JM: THE WORLD IS COMING TO AN END. REPENT SINNERS FOR THE RAPTURE IS UPON US. BACK TO BACK WEEKS WITH TORNADO KOS SIGNALS THE END TIMES.

But seriously, how wild is that? I think I’ve seen, like, three tornado kicks in my life. Suddenly it’s just raining spinning dudes.

AL: These things to tend to happen in waves, so just a word of warning to all the fighters out there: you could be next.

After that, Maksim Kolosov’s head kick KO of Mikhail Pedko almost seems pedestrian in comparison. Though I think Pedko will tell you that it didn’t feel all that great either.

https://twitter.com/Jolassanda/status/1114518606782631938

JM: I love this KO because it’s basically exactly what I do whenever I’m playing EA UFC. I’m not sure why but every time I defend a takedown, my hands immediately mash the head kick buttons. The opponent’s hands are down low from failing on their shot and no one ever sees it coming. I can’t tell you how many digital careers I’ve ended with the sprawl and Cro Cop combo.

AL: Pedko’s second pro boutlearned the hard way to watch out for the patented “Jed-Meshew-head-kick-off-of-a-stuffed-takedown”. A truly deadly technique.

JM: I’m just saying, if you run into the Brawlter Cronkite on Xbox Live, watch out.

AL: Our last clip from M-1 features a sweet throw by Anna Emelyanenko (no relation?) on Ksenia Stepanova, followed by a… smother submission?

meet Anna Emelyanenko

Anna tapped Ksenia Stepanova in 2R

(Road to M-1) pic.twitter.com/YNapS7kEXl — Jolassanda (@Jolassanda) April 6, 2019

JM: I think that’s the rare no-gi Ezekiel choke from scarf position! I can’t be one hundred percent sure because it’s kinda hard to tell what is where but I think Emelyanenko has her left arm across the throat and her right wrapped around the head. She’s not related to Fedor, but maybe she’s kin to Aleksei Oleinik?

AL: “The Boa Constrictor” would definitely be proud of Emelyanenko’s work here.

The U.S. Road to M-1 show can be seen on UFC Fight Pass, while highlights of the Russian edition can be seen below:

Maksim Schekin vs. Denis Dzhivovsky

Emilee Gettys vs. Ashley Samples

AL: Before we get to a pair of submissions from Saturday’s Fight Nights Global show in Moscow (full fights available for replay on YouTube), let us show our respect to FNG announcer Alexander Zagorsky for making his entrance to the cage in true baller fashion.

Here he is !

The motorcycled White Scorpion Aleksandr Zagorsky !!!

Fight Night Moscow can start now ! pic.twitter.com/CAXnujKKQa — Jolassanda (@Jolassanda) April 6, 2019

JM: This is why the UFC will never be the best MMA org. Can’t we get Rogan riding a DMT fueled velociraptor on his way to the ring? WHAT IS THE POINT OF A HARLEY DAVIDSON SPONSORSHIP IF YOU AREN’T GONNA USE IT?!?!

AL: Sir, this is an MMA show.

As fun as that was, Maksim Schekin’s submission of Denis Dzhivovsky is considerably less joyous.

Maksim Schekin broked Denis arm in 46 seconds (FNG) pic.twitter.com/Zl2ouHJbS7 — Jolassanda (@Jolassanda) April 6, 2019

He is just going to town on that arm, I don’t know what Dzhivovsky was thinking could happen there. All the credit in the world to him for hanging on, but damn man, you need that limb to live your life!

JM: I rarely say this here, but I’m truly impressed by Dzhivovsky. The first time Schekin Gumby’d his arm back I thought for sure it was over, but when Dzhivovsky survived that, I thought he must just be one of those Stretch Armstrong guys with unbreakable limbs.

Good thing it was his left arm at least. No one uses their left so it’s fine his is now broken.

AL: And there goes all of our lefty readership.

Over at Valor Fighting Challenge 57 in Knoxville, Tenn., a day prior, Emilee Gettys picked up her first pro win in four tries with a nasty ankle lock (begins around the 2:08 mark of this clip):

Unlike Dzhivovsky, Gettys’s opponent Ashley Samples probably had a good chance of getting out of this, but once Gettys snagged that foot under her armpit, it was Snap City.

JM: That is an absolutely majestic transition. It’s not everyday you see someone go from armbar to inverted heel hook but damn if that’s not what happened. Gettys got me feeling all types of ways right now.

Robert Talarek vs. Patryk Szymanski

AL: There was some great work being done on the mats, but we’d be remiss if we didn’t talk about one of the craziest fights of the weekend, which took place in a boxing ring in Katowice, Poland: Robert Talarek vs. Patryk Szymanski.

As covered by Bloody Elbow, this match featured a combined total of 10 (!) knockdowns. If this were an MMA fight, there were several instances where it would have been stopped.

Highlights from last night's spectacular, back-and-forth WAR between Patryk Szymanski and Robert Talarek in Poland.



Ten knockdowns in five rounds. pic.twitter.com/bkGMBIhHKH — Michael Benson (@MichaelBensonn) April 7, 2019

And naturally, it was Talarek, who was absolutely getting brained early on, that would go on to win the fight.

JM: We don’t need to say too much about this one since it was covered by Mookie Alexander, who is both smarter and more handsome than either of us, but that may in fact be the wildest fight I’ve ever seen. 10 knockdowns is not a thing that happens in boxing unless it’s like Kimbo’s backyard where when you’re gassed out you just take a knee because there’s no such thing as judges.

Also, shouts to the temporary promo back tattoo. I always love those because they are both ridiculous, and remind me of the time Ricco Rodriguez tried to give Dana White a heart attack by getting Golden Palace on his back when he was explicitly told not to wear a Casino shirt with that on it. Then he took that sponsor money and bet it on himself and made a half million dollars. What a hero.

Shawn Ellis vs. Brima Kamara

Mostafa Tabtaghadze vs. Chaophraya

Chatchay vs. Enzo Petricig

AL: And let’s close off with what’s becoming a staple of Missed Fists: the best/worst KOs that kickboxing and Muay Thai have to offer. Here are a trio of absolutely disgusting finishes, the first courtesy of Shawn Ellis from a Friday Night Fights show in New York last Friday (available for replay on UFC Fight Pass).

And.. that's gonna do it for this fight! Tough to get up from that! pic.twitter.com/9RvMLWXw7y — UFC FIGHT PASS (@UFCFightPass) April 6, 2019

He literally stabbed that heel right into Brima Kamara’s chest. F-word.

JM: The only thing that hits harder than Ellis’s foot are those shorts. Those things are fire hot.

But I see your spinning back kick and raise you a “How dare you try to kick me you miscreant!” from a Muay Thai Super Champ show in Bangkok on Sunday (full event available on YouTube):

Good morning

dead

Mostafa Tabtaghadze Kos Chaophraya (Muay-Thai Super Champ) pic.twitter.com/NAN3z9YQRy — Jolassanda (@Jolassanda) April 7, 2019

That, good sir, is a dead body.

AL: I know some people who absolutely hate having their feet touched. I like to think that nobody would do to me what Mostafa Tabtaghadze did to Chaophraya should I ever cross that line.

This last one by Chatchay… man, I feel like it requires some sort of parental advisory warning. It’s bad. You shouldn’t watch it.

But here it is.

Dead

The Mortal Hellbow

Chatchay KOs Enzo Petricig (Muay-Thai Super Champ) pic.twitter.com/GTX9iiGifs — Jolassanda (@Jolassanda) April 7, 2019

JM: I stand corrected. THAT is a dead body. Wow. Short, chopping elbow to the dome piece will do ya, I guess. That is mean.

AL: There’s no topping that one, so let us sign off for now and do so on a much happier note.

Take care, everyone.

Poll What was the most memorable Missed Fists moment this week? This poll is closed. 30% Travis Fulton wins his 257th fight (70 votes)

11% Bekulan Saipzhanov breaks out a tornado kick (26 votes)

1% Emilee Gettys takes a leg home (4 votes)

15% Robert Talarek and Patryk Szymanski’s 10-knockdown war (36 votes)

38% Chatchay lands the elbow to end all elbows (88 votes)

1% Other (leave comment below) (4 votes) 228 votes total Vote Now

If you know of a recent fight or event that you think may have been overlooked or a promotion that could use some attention, please let us know on Twitter @JedKMeshew and @AlexanderKLee using the hashtag #MissedFists.