Today is the day. It’s 190 days since the Eurovision song submission window opened on 1 September and time has run out for the 41 countries in this year’s contest to finalise their entries for Rotterdam. As always, a handful of nations keep us on tenterhooks until the last moment. It’s a very exciting day in the Eurovision calendar, but with no televised national selections, there’s no focal point for us fans to gather around. If only we did it like they do in football…

***Dramatic news music***

Conchita: Welcome back. It’s 7pm on deadline day. With little under 4 hours to go until the window closes, these are the headlines.

Azerbaijan and Malta have both announced Cleopatra as their song for Rotterdam and accused the other of plagiarism. Will it go to court?

There’s outrage in Belgium, as it’s announced Hooverphonic have been forced to rename themselves Vacuumphonic for the contest. We have the latest from the protests in Antwerp.

And as footage from Jon Ola Sand’s retirement party emerges showing him doing the Roop Dance, some commentators question his impartiality.

***Deadline day graphic goes across the screen with a whooshy sound effect***

Måns: But first, we go to our reporter, Jim, at RTSH Headquarters. What’s the mood like in Tirana Jim?

***Cut to an Albanian car park. It’s night time. Jim is surrounded by Eurovision fans ***

Jim: Thanks Måns. Expectations are reaching a fever pitch out here. We’re reliably informed by EBU sources that Arilena Ara and her production team boarded a plane from Los Angeles earlier today. We expect her to reach us here in the capital any minute and deliver that revamp to her victorious Festivali i Kenges entry!

***Huge cheers from the crowd***

Måns: And tell me Jim, why can’t she just send it by email or file transfer?

Jim: I’m sorry Måns, what was that? I can’t here you? It’s…

***Jim is drowned out by chants of “SHQIP-ER-IA” and one person singing Simply The Best***

Måns: We’ll leave it there Jim.

Conchita: Now we’re off to San Marino. Confusion reigns in the Serene Republic, doesn’t it Colin?

***Cut to Colin outside SMRTV, which appears to be an office above a branch of Lidl***

Colin: Thank you Conchita, yes, this morning we thought San Marino’s participation was a done deal. We were just waiting for the official paperwork to go through that would confirm Senhit as their 2020 entrant. However this afternoon, stories came out from the building above me that Senhit has failed her medical. We understand that there are concerns over an old throat injury and now with less than four hours to go, everything is up in the air.

Conchita: And is there any further word on the potential for the delegation to look elsewhere?

Colin: Well, you saw the sensational pictures earlier when Aly Ryan drove herself down here. We now understand that she was acting entirely of her own volition and had not been invited by anyone inside. Then of course, she ended up being turned away from the car park, because she wasn’t willing to buy anything from the shop. We believe she is still in the country though; she posted a picture on Instagram of the sun setting over the San Marino mountains less than an hour ago. We will continue to keep a close eye on her Twitter and TikTok as the night progresses.

Meanwhile, there are numerous reports circulating that SMRTV have appealed to other previous representatives for help. Michele Perniola said no, so he won’t be going to Rotterdam. We are keeping a close eye on the comings and goings at Valentina Monetta’s house round the corner from here. The best we can get out of her so far is “Maybe”. However, the latest position is that Senhit’s doctors are currently trying to provide reassurance to the San Marino medical team and her participation may yet go ahead. Senhit is still hopeful and she will stand by.

Conchita: Thank you Colin. We’ll come back to you as the situation unfolds.

Måns: Over at the Europad we have Verka, who has been keeping track of all the facts and figures for us at the end of a momentous national final season. Verka, I think you’ve got the latest odds for us?

***Pan over to Verka at the interactive screen***

Verka: Yes I do Måns! If I press this button here and press this button here and SWIPE! Now, Måns, you can see that after that reveal of Bulgaria’s entry they are up to 7/1. That’s Sieben to Eins, sieben to eins. Meanwhile, Iceland are still narrowing. They are odds on Måns at eins to zwei. Sieben to eins, eins, to zwei…

TANZEN!!!

***three minute dance break***

Conchita: Thank you Verka. Now back to Tirana. You’ve got big news for us Jim?

***Jim is still in the RTSH car park, but the group of fans behind him has grown in size and noise***

Jim: Thank you Conchita. Just moments ago a black Mercedes arrived here at RTSH headquarters and we got our first sighting of Arilena Ara. She is in that building right over there and she is armed with a copy of Albania’s revamped entry for 2020. And actually I’m getting word through right now…

***Jim motions to the crowd to be quiet as he holds a finger to his ear. An odd hush develops***

And I’m being told now and this is not yet official, but it appears the revamped entry is… in Albanian!

***CROWD GOES WILD. People are screaming and jumping on each others’ shoulders. Somewhere in the background a red flare is set off. One man jumps in front of the camera, shirtless, clutching a cardboard cutout of a double-headed eagle***

Conchita: Thank you Jim. We’ll get back to you once we get official word. Those were amazing scenes there, weren’t they Måns?

Måns: Incredible, Conchita. That’s the power of Eurovision. We hope everyone at home is feeling the excitement the way we are in the studio. We still have a little over three and a half hours to go before the window closes and we’ll be here all night keeping you right up to date with the latest developments, live and exclusive on Netflix.

Everyone: VOTE DAÐI!!!