Today I wake up to the 4th consecutive day of checking my social media to see message after message about those people who voted for Donald Trump. You tell me I’m hateful. You tell me I’m misogynistic and racist and homophobic. You tell me I’m unintelligent. You mock that trace of southern accent that comes through when I say y’all. You tell me I don’t deserve your respect. You show me in every way how much hatred you feel toward me. So I want you to know that I love you.

To the women in my life – as I was growing up, it never even occurred to me that my gender would affect the possibility of me achieving anything. When I wanted to be a teacher, a lawyer, a marine biologist, a publishing executive, and whatever else I said I wanted to be, I was told over and over again that I could do that. I watched my mom tackle endeavor after endeavor into the world of entrepreneurship, never truly giving up hope, and certainly never thinking she, as a woman, had any less possibility of success.

Though that’s not to say no one in my family family has an old-fashioned way of thinking. Just this summer, I argued with my grandmother that a woman could have absolutely any job she wanted and do it just as well as a man. In particular, I argued that one day, we would have an amazing woman president, but that I didn’t think Hillary Clinton was it (she did finally agree with me – provided that I was going to be that female president). I do not in any way find women inferior. I am strong, independent, and highly capable. And so are you.

So when I voted for Trump, I didn’t vote to hurt you or demean you. I voted for his plan to provide paid maternity leave to all working mothers, like the one I will be when I choose to have children. I voted for his plan to provide deductions and tax credits to assist in paying for childcare, which could help some of my current and former students to be in school more often instead of home taking care of younger siblings (source). So I voted, not because I hate you, but because I love you.

To the people of color in my life – I spend my days in a classroom with only students of color. My students are Latino; they are African American; they are Arabic.I pour my heart and soul, my time and energy, my own money, everything I have, into educating these children. And you tell me that I hate them? They may frustrate me, and push my buttons and leave me crying some days. But they make me light up when they finally get something I’m teaching, when I see them being good people, when they make choices that will positively impact their futures. I weep for them when I suspect abuse, when they run away because of problems at home, when they can’t get to school because they’ve moved to a new homeless shelter, when we send them home with food because there isn’t enough to eat at home.

So when I voted for Trump, I didn’t vote make your lives worse or to devalue you. I voted to end/renegotiate trade deals that have resulted in a huge loss of jobs in our country, and unemployment disproportionately affects people of color. I voted to end the H1-B visa program that allows employers to bring in people from other countries and pay them less for jobs that could be done by people in our own country who are currently unemployed, and to replace that program with one that will provide these employers with a resume bank filled with the resumes of qualified people from the inner-cities of America (source). And yes, I voted to secure our borders. Not to try to deport every undocumented person here, but to deport the criminals who are here (which is actually the plan, Trump says he will deport 2 million criminal aliens; there are >11 million undocumented people here that we know of). These criminals are living in the poor communities that I serve. They are the gang members who create problems in my school’s neighborhood, who start trying to recruit my middle school aged students, who become the role-models for my students who then tell me “I don’t have a goal. I’m going to join a gang. I’ll just live in section 8 housing and get food stamps.” I want more for my students who have so much potential. So I voted, not because I hate you, but because I love you.

To the LGBT people in my life – I’ve cried with you about coming out. I’ve celebrated your relationships, and hugged you when you’ve felt like you’ll never find love. I’ve laughed with you and tackled growing up with you. I’ve cheered the accomplishments of you personally, and of the community with which you identify. I’ve wanted you to be a part of my life and I’ve missed you desperately when you’re not.

So when I voted for Trump, I didn’t vote to take away your rights or try to change you. I voted for the candidate who didn’t have 20% of his campaign funded by a country that would still kill you for being gay. I voted for the candidate who didn’t laugh off a gay man being thrown off a building. And I voted to restrict refugees coming from the middle east – not because I’m Islamophobic, a phobia suggests irrational fear, mine is not – because I fear for the safety of people including you. After seeing reports like this one, I want to know that you are safe. I will admit that the reversal of the Supreme Court ruling on gay marriage would not be the happiest day (I celebrated love the day love won, too), but the decisions will simply go to the states. 70% of states already allowed you to be married before the ruling and I have faith in the people of this country that they will continue the trend in your favor. Ultimately, I would rather know you’re safely waiting a few years to get married, than you be married, but fearing for your safety. So I voted, not because I hate you, but because I love you.

I voted because I love my country. I voted because I love my small business owning father. I voted because I love the uneducated, but hard working farmers who had a hand in raising me. I voted because I love the communities in the part of the country where I grew up that have lost so many jobs. I voted because I love my friends who took out loans for college only to struggle to pay them back. I voted because I love my veteran boyfriend and all those that served alongside him, before him, and after him. I voted because I love myself.

I expect that you will continue to tell me I’m hateful. You’ll continue to belittle me and my opinions and perspectives. You’ll call me names and tell me I’m stupid. And I will continue to hold my tongue. I’ll allow you to process a change in whatever way you need. Because I love you.