LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT

Climate scientists are not the only group unhappy with the warmer weather as video game enthusiast Joseph Creen (19) expresses his distaste for this beautiful sunny day that is causing an infuriating strip of glare to fall across his gaming monitor.

Being told from a young age he could do anything, Creen has since lead a legion of ancient armies, survived in apocalyptic landscapes and travelled to galaxies distant beyond comprehension, all while making time to stack shelves in a supermarket after hours.

Creen usually enjoys a flexible rent-free lifestyle at his parent’s house but has found himself enraged as the radiant sun has crept inside his dirty clothes nest of a bedroom and settled on his gaming screen.

“I’m not the only farmer outraged by this weather,” stated Creen as he tended to his Minecraft crops.

“At least our farmers don’t have to put up with these fucking slime cubes.”

Since the joyous sun has joined Creen for his video game sessions, Creen has tried to keep it out by attaching one of the roughly 30 dirty towels in his room to the discount blind rack in order for the sun to stop reminding him there is a valuable world outside his king-single petri dish.

According to Creen’s parents, they would buy their son new blinds if they could afford it but are unsure how to budget for them without charging their son board, getting him to pay for them or kicking him out altogether.