This study examined the prevalence and rationales for same-sex kissing among university-attending young men across the U.S. Given research that found a new trend of heterosexual men kissing each other (Anderson et al. 2012a, b; Drummond et al. 2014), we examined both the prevalence of same-sex kissing among young adult males in the U.S. and the rationales of this behavior. Overall, 40% of the self-identified heterosexual undergraduate men in our sample reported kissing or being kissed by a male friend on the cheek, while 10% reported kissing or being kissed by a male friend on the lips. This compares with 89% of men in the U.K. study who report having kissed another man on the lip (Anderson et al. 2012a, b).Footnote 1 Despite overall kissing rates varying across universities, our statistical models accounted for the fact that observations were nested within universities. Thus, our estimates refer to the sample at large, demonstrating that this form of kissing occurs across these 11 universities that positioned in different areas of the country and hold diverse student populations.

While same-sex kisses could be viewed as sexual exploration, the narratives of participants suggest that kissing does not have sexual connotations for these men. They described it as a form of social bonding, and a way of demonstrating close friendship. Corroborating international scholarship on men’s kissing behaviors (Anderson et al. 2012a, b; Drummond et al. 2014), same-sex kissing among heterosexual undergraduate men appears to be an act of emotional expression, and not sexual fluidity. In the sample of 75 men interviewed, five participants said that same-sex kissing would connote a gay identity—7% of that sample. Thus, while heterosexual men kissing one another may not be as widespread as in the U.K. or Australia, it is similarly a socially acceptable behavior amongst participants in this study (c.f. Derlega et al. 1989; Floyd 2000).

The emergence of heterosexual men kissing documented in this study has important implications for theoretical understandings of masculinity in the U.S. While limited in prevalence, these behaviors provide a challenge to orthodox forms of masculinity that marginalize behaviors associated with femininity or gay identity (Connell 1995; Plummer 1999). Whereas articulations of masculinity during periods of homohysteria do not permit heterosexual men to engage in intimate behaviors with other men (Kimmel 1996; Plummer 1999), a great deal more flexibility is afforded to participants in this study who do not see kissing another man as a threat to their heterosexual social identity. With participants espousing positive attitudes toward gay people (see also Twenge et al. 2016), and engaging in feminized behaviors such as kissing without censure, this study supports the growing body of literature that discusses the emergence of inclusive masculinities (e.g. Anderson 2014; McCormack 2012; Gottzen and Kremer-Sadlik 2012). Expanding recent research showing that some men engage in same-sex sex while maintaining heterosexual identities (McCormack 2018; Vrangalova and Savin-Williams 2013), this study highlights that kissing is not necessarily sexual and can be coded as an emotional, bonding experience.

The data does not enable an understanding of other men’s perceptions of kissing behaviors—as such, it is possible that these men are perceived as gay by others, and that the one-time rule of homosexuality still exists more generally. This is an important factor in guarding against too broad interpretations from these results. We also highlight that participants had the opportunity in these semi-structured interviews to discuss impediments to same-sex kissing and social issues around it: only five of the participants discussed maintenance of a heterosexual identity as a reason for avoiding kissing. Thus, even if others still perceive participants to be gay for kissing, it would seem that such perception has lost its ability to police other men’s behaviors and expressions of emotional intimacy for me in our sample (Anderson et al. 2012a, b; c.f. Plummer 1999).

This study develops the growing body of research on inclusive masculinities in several ways. Firstly, by providing quantitative evidence of the emergence of same-sex kissing among undergraduate heterosexual men, it demonstrates the extent to which a once-censured form of tactility is present among men in the U.S. It also corresponds with research demonstrating the increasing range of homosocial behaviors that inclusive straight men engage in (e.g. Anderson and McCormack 2015; Scoats 2017). While not the main focus of the study, the positive attitudes toward homosexuality and gay men found among almost three quarters of the sample population is further evidence of the social trend of decreasing homophobia, particularly given the random sampling procedure at 11 different universities across the U.S. As such, this research supports the argument that dominant forms of masculinities in U.S. university cultures are transitioning away from a homophobic jock figure, where homosexuality was exceedingly stigmatized (as explained by Connell’s (1995) theorizing), to a set of masculinities that are inclusive both of same-sex sexual desires and non-sexual displays of intimacy between male friends (Anderson 2014; Scoats et al. 2018).

This study also enables comparison of levels of kissing with other Western cultures, namely the U.K. (Anderson et al. 2012a, b) and Australia (Drummond et al. 2014). We contend that it is the differences in attitudes toward gay people in these cultures that are the primary reason for the cross-cultural differences in kissing (see Anderson 2014). However, structural variance in access to alcohol is also likely a contributing factor. Given that alcohol acts as a disinhibitor that escalates emotional expression, the more liberal drinking laws in the U.K. and Australia (where drinking is permitted at 18) and on university campuses, may result in more tactile gendered behaviors in these contexts. Importanaly, while Peralta (2007) showed how alcohol consumption led men to engage in a number of damaging masculine behaviors, our research found that alcohol may facilitate less harmful masculine behaviors in particular social contexts.

Age and social context are likely to be important factors in this finding. In contemporary research, kissing has only been demonstrated among younger men, and it is argued that youth culture is an important context in which these behaviors occur (Anderson 2014). The developmental stage of ‘emerging adulthood’ (Arnett 2004), in which these young men are currently situated, likely provides the space to explore same-sex kissing with heterosexual friends. In addition to being a period in life where it is possible to bond closely with other young men (Kimmel 2008), the social context of decreased homophobia means that men are less likely to be regulated if they engage in such behaviors (Anderson et al. 2012a, b).

The association between membership of a fraternity or sports team and same-sex kissing may be attributed to the heteromasculine capital afforded to men in these organizations. When masculine capital is elevated, men are afforded more space for gender transgression without being labelled as gay (McGuffey and Rich 1999). However, given that fear of being socially perceived as gay was only the third stated reason for not wanting to kiss other men, the link with fraternal organizations is likely more attributable to the way these institutions structure men to spend increased time socializing together and where close friendships can form. It is in these contexts that ‘bromances’ between friends are more likely to occur and in which homosocial friendships are often privileged (Robinson et al. 2018), and that homosocial spaces such as fraternities may facilitate exploration of such intimacy.

Comparing these findings with women’s same-sex kisses in university contexts is a useful endeavor. Rupp et al. (2014) argue that the college hook up scene is a gendered and heteronormative sexual field that fosters the practice of women kissing other women in public for the benefit of male onlookers, rather than because of same-sex sexual desire—even though women’s sexual desires have been shown to be quite fluid (Diamond 2008). While they contend that these kisses are primarily for men’s benefits, they also provide new perspectives on how kisses are perceived socially, arguing that as their participants “act in ways that uncouple desire, behavior, and identity from heteronormativity, they are participating in the process of undoing gender” (Rupp et al. 2014: 229). They discuss how these same-sex kisses serve to undo gender and act in ways that subvert dominant binary categorizations of sex and sexuality. In a similar manner, while further research will need to interrogate how men’s kissing behaviors are determined by institutional context and masculine capital, they can also be interpreted as a mechanism by which norms of orthodox masculinities are subverted and the one-time rule of homosexuality undermined.

Limitations and Future Directions

There are of course limitations to this study. Social desirability bias may have affected participants’ responses, and it is possible that some interview participants identified as straight rather than admit being gay to another man. Our findings are also restricted to college-attending heterosexual men. While we recruited participants from a diverse range of geographical and institutional settings, data is a long way from reflecting the cultural diversity of the U.S. Similarly, while our population is diverse in terms of race, we have not provided detailed analysis of this variable in this article. Findings may also have been influenced by the position of the researcher in the field, and the role of social desirability in participant responses.

There were also differences in percentage across surveys and interview, with higher rates of reported kissing found among interview respondents compared to survey respondents (13% rather than 9% for kissing, and 53% rather than 38% for cheek kissing). One explanation for this is that people asked to disclose their sexuality to a stranger may be inclined to identify as straight rather than disclose a sexual minority identity—and as such, the survey results provide a more representative figure. However, we have argued elsewhere that it unlikely that participants would opt to convincingly maintain a false identity for the duration of an interview, rather than decide to terminate the interview (Anderson and McCormack 2016). These could also be attributed to differences in sample size; self-selection factor among men opting into a long interview; or that in-depth interviews permitted the researchers more clarity in expressing that they were not equating kissing behaviors with a closeted gay identity, making participants more willing to disclose instances of homosocial tactility. Regardless of the exact reason for these differences, it is clear from both in-depth interviews and short surveys that our participants reported homosocial kissing at rates greater than 0. We refer to the average statistic for these reasons, and note that the differences between the average and the survey statistics are quite small.

We have restricted claims of generalizability to men attending colleges in the U.S. aged between 18 and 25 as this demographic may be one where same-sex kissing behaviors are more likely to apply. First, participants live in a life stage of emerging adulthood in which men have more freedom to engage in homosocial behaviors and develop deep friendships (Arnett 2004). The literature on same-sex kissing among men (Anderson et al. 2012a, b; Drummond et al. 2014) has only studied university-attending men and this is because the university is also a context where men are able to develop close friendships and may also be an institutional context for more liberal sexual cultures (Bogle 2008).

While both the survey and interviews distinguished between kissing on the cheek and lips, the focus on prevalence and situational contexts in which kissing occurred (e.g. fraternities, sports etc.) means that there is not the systematic data to present findings in this research on the ways in which these kinds of kisses occur in different contexts. Examining the different forms of kissing, the meanings attached to them and in what contexts they occur are important areas of future research. Furthermore, future research needs to examine for these behaviors when investigating college men’s social lives, in both qualitative and quantitative investigations. Given that research has highlighted the performative nature of same-sex kissing for women in mix-sexed groups (Rupp et al. 2014), further research examining for differences in how straight men kiss each other in homosocial and mixed-sex contexts would also develop gendered and sociological understanding of these issues.