Is it just the griddle-smashed burgers we love, or is it also the eccentricities of the Burger’s Priest?

There’s the secret menu, the closed-on-Sunday and cash only inconveniences, the religious overtones, the insistence that burgers means cheeseburgers, and the lineups.

Then there’s Shant Mardirosian, the burger king himself.

He’s reserved, not cheeky. He’s grateful for the love but doesn’t brag about it or plaster the walls with reviews and awards. He’s an Armenian-American from Los Angeles who moved here in 1984.

When the Burger’s Priest’s voicemail says “Please note we are closed on Sunday for church,” it’s sincere not ironic. Mardirosian is a Tyndale University College & Seminary graduate who planned to be a pastoral minister until God called him to something else.

That “something else,” he discovered three years later in a burger joint in New York, was “redeeming the burger one at a time” — but only six days a week.

“We close everything down on Sunday,” explains Mardirosian, whose website directs people to Grace Toronto Church. “We turn the gas down and the power off. It gives not only us a rest, but the place a rest. I always say our burgers are so good because we get that day to calm down.”

This week the crowd-sourced Zagat Survey declared that the mostly takeout Burger’s Priest has the third best food in Toronto, after upscale, sit-down restaurants Scaramouche and Chiado (plus its sibling Senhor Antonio Tapas and Wine Bar).

Sure, there are “BP” haters, those who find it pretentious, and others who are let down by the hype. I’ve been a cult follower at the original Queen and Coxwell branch since it opened in June 2010, so thank Zagat for providing an excuse to finally meet Mardirosian at his month-old uptown branch.

The new shop is on Yonge St. north of Lawrence Ave. and has 1,200 square feet, a bathroom and 14 stools for customers. (The original shop is space-challenged with just 450 square feet, only half of it for the cooks and customers).

My default order is a cheeseburger with everything but pickles. I’ve read about the secret menu on blogs and in magazines but it’s not mentioned at the restaurants. You have to know what to order.

There is a famous secret menu for In-N-Out-Burger in the U.S., and I’ve tried it. But I’ve been admittedly scared to screw up at BP and get mocked or refused. That’s despite help from bloggers like Food With Legs who have detailed the secret menu while copping to fears of being banned from the burger joint.

“I don’t know where they get this stuff from,” says Mardirosian with a shrug and a sigh. “We just let customers come in and make up burgers with the ingredients that we have. We always let them name it.”

The 34-year-old generously talks me through his off-menu menu items, stressing “mostly they’re just monstrosities that people order for fun.”

All burgers start from a custom blend of “ultrapremium beef” that’s ground in-house several times a day and rolled into 4-ounce balls and seasoned with just salt and peppers. They’re cooked to order on a flat-top griddle, where they’re “smashed” into patties and transferred to small, soft, white, squishy buns that remind me of the 1970s.

On the written menu, you’ll find cheeseburgers and double cheeseburgers (a.k.a. the double). The Option is a veggie burger made of fried, cheese-stuffed Portobello mushrooms. The Priest is an Option plus a cheeseburger.

Off menu, the oddly popular Vatican City boasts two grilled cheese sandwiches (made from buns) and two cheeseburgers. Mardirosian is pretty proud of that one, but won’t discuss the High Priest, with its two beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese on a non-sesame seed bun.

Loading... Loading... Loading... Loading... Loading... Loading...

Holy Smokes is a double cheeseburger with panko-coated, deep-fried jalapeno rings. You can order anything “with smoke.”

The Pope (double cheeseburger plus Option) becomes the Tower of Babel when you add the Vatican City bun. There’s the Noah’s Ark (an Option with chili, cheese and onions) and the Religious Hypocrite (Option plus bacon). The Judgment Day (two Options in a cheeseburger) becomes an Armageddon when you ask for two cheeseburger patties.

Try keeping all that (and more) straight.

But this I urge you to order: a cheeseburger or double cheeseburger “Jarge-style.” The beef ball is coated on the bottom with yellow mustard and smashed so the mustard cooks into the meat. It’s topped with fried onions mixed with special sauce.

Mardirosian won’t give up sauce details, but will gladly discuss how his friend Rob’s nickname has become a “Toronto culture phenomenon.” Jarge is a made-up word/sound (sort of jarz-sh) that Rob once made in Whistler when he was cold.

Rob/Jarge is also “an animal,” says Mardirosian in an inside reference to the “animal-style” secret burger at In-N-Out featuring a mustard-cooked patty with extra “spread” inspired by that gaudy pink Thousand Island Dressing.

It’s a bit of a chore figuring out the secret menu. But not downright exhausting as it was for Mardirosian to create Burger’s Priest. He spent nine months in New York City in 2007 working at burger joints. Then he waited at four Toronto restaurants for 20 hours a day to raise money to buy the Queen St. building.

He hoped to sell 20 burger combos a day. He does about 400 orders a day on Queen St. and 600 a day already on Yonge St. (An order can be anything from a Coke to a dozen burgers.) He has 45 staff.

And here’s one final surprise about Mardirosian. He takes bites as needed. Once every six months, he treats himself to a whole burger.

jbain@thestar.ca

www.twitter.com/thesaucylady