Trump Celebrates the Fourth of July by Continuing to Collude with Russia

Washington DC (The Plebian): “Donald Trump is celebrating the founding of the country by conspiring with a foreign power to over throw democratic norms,” said Sarah Huckabee Sanders for the White House early Wednesday morning. “There’s nothing more American then apple pie, barbeques, and Russia.”

In response to the criticism that democratic norms are American and destroying them was unpatriotic Mrs. Sanders responded that, “American has a proud tradition of destroying democratic processes. Just look at what we did to Iran. We should bring more of that American oppression to America.”

Across the isle Democrats disagreed. “America is a great country because of its democratic values. Its one of the few countries on earth where anyone can vote,” exclaimed Senator Bernie Sanders. The White house retorted that Bernie was “a socialist, who’s un-American viewpoint will not be tolerated today.”