ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

Last night at the Betoota Bowery Ballroom, a local live music enthusiast stood in awe as Taxiride played a smorgasbord of their classic hits – as well as their tasteful and experimental new stuff.

As Emma Hall bobbed her head and clicked her fingers to the beat, she paused and thought that the second emergence of the chorus is Creepin’ Up Slowly would be some prime content to throw up on her Instagram Story.

Speaking to The Advocate this morning with a sore head and the fleeting remnants of a K-hole, the 28-year-old youngish professional said she had a blast – and she wanted her ‘less-cool’ followers to know she was at a show.

“My friends and I smoked a joint before we went in. Classic Taxiride behaviour, they have the best fans,” she said.

“But I didn’t put that on my IG story! Just the gig! I’ve got so many friends who don’t do anything on the weekend. They put boring things like their partners, dogs, babies or them on a hike on their Insta stories,”

“Not me. I got so hammered last night, I did ketamine. Went to a kick on and yeah, this guy cut me a line and said, ‘go ham’, so I went ham. I went from having a good time to speaking Greek to myself in the back garden in like 30 seconds! Cool!”

A friend and avid follower of Emma’s social media activity also spoke to our reporter this morning.

Grace Lee freely admitted she didn’t do anything last night because she ‘doesn’t have a life’ and ‘felt tired’.

The lame Virgo went on to reiterate to our reporter that she did not, in fact, feel FOMO for not going to Taxiride last night.

“I don’t know why people do this, I reckon people just swipe left and go onto the next story,” she said.

“But yeah, last night. I didn’t do anything. My three friends were all away for doing something with family so I just watched MeatEater on Netflix and dreamed about buying a nice rifle and getting amongst nature,”

“I think I’ve got it in me to shoot, clean and butcher a deer. It seems like such a nice way to live. So primal. So, uh yeah. Not jealous of Taxiride.”

More to come.