The Frank Beamer Retirement Chronicles is The Key Play's effort to chronicle Beamer's retirement adventures, encounters, and social media appearances. Complete archives.

Frank Beamer won't make the trip to Notre Dame to watch the Hokies take on the Irish. Instead, the former Virginia Tech head coach will attend the Miss Virginia USA and Miss Virginia Teen USA State Pageant at the Moss Arts Center.

You can't make this up, Coach Beamer just told the @NBCSports crew that he can't make the game at ND because he's judging a beauty pageant— VT Football (@VT_Football) November 16, 2016

Although, he will not be judging, after all he couldn't dole out double-zeros as a score. Rather, he will motivate the contestants, answer questions, and hand out trophies.

"He is actually giving the girls a pep talk like he would do the football players in the locker room," Kim Nicewonder, executive director of the Miss Virginia USA® and Miss Virginia Teen USA® State Pageant told [WaPo's Dan Steinberg] in an exclusive interview. "What's kind of interesting is that his pep talks that he's used to doing in the locker room, he's taking it in a little different direction this year and he's going to be giving a pep talk to the Miss Virginia USA® contestants before they compete in the final night. This is a pep talk on stage, in a glamorous evening gown instead of a football jersey, and he will be presenting his pep talk to a group of beautiful, good-smelling women rather than dirty stinky sweaty football players."

That formalwear round will get after ya.