(PoD = c. 2002)

​



The year is 2017. It has been more than fifteen years since the End of History came to an end, and in similar vain to the Roaring Twenties or the Dirty Thirties, in the US, the 2000s decade has earned the moniker of the "Awful Aughts" (although many would argue that so far, the 2010s haven't been a whole lot better). By and large, this America is far more conservative than ours -- gay marriage is only legalized in a handful of states, as is marijuana (and even then, only for medicinal usage).



The tragic events of 9/11 would unfortunately prove to be merely the first in a series of attacks on United States soil perpetrated by Islamic extremists: on 9 April 2003, just few weeks after the invasion of Iraq, much of the Golden Gate Bridge in San Francisco was destroyed in a bombing attack, leaving more than 750 dead and injuring over a thousand more. On 11 September, 2006, the fifth anniversary of the WTC's destruction, eight terrorists enacted a plot to collapse Willis Tower in Chicago, with the intention of causing tens of thousands of civilian fatalities (thankfully, the bombs used in this attack were nowhere near powerful enough to accomplish this, although still caused dozens of deaths). Independence Day 2008 (often remembered as the Bloody Fourth) saw Abdullah Khan, a 22-year-old British-born jihadist, detonate a bomb aboard American Airlines Flight 404, killing nearly 200 passengers and flight crew, and dozens more on the ground below. It's not just Islamic terrorism that's been on the rise, right-wing extremism has been rearing its ugly, shaven head with startling frequency in recent years: aside from the dramatic spike in hate crimes committed against anybody who looks even remotely Middle Eastern, who could forget the St. Louis Pride March Massacre (which remains the deadliest mass shooting in the country's history), or the Texas abortion clinic bombings of 2007?



With the turbulent political climate over the past decade and a half, it is perhaps not too surprising that the United States has not seen a two-term President since Bill Clinton. More superstitious Americans have attributed this phenomenon to the legendary "Prescott's Curse", which claims that the ghost of Prescott Bush, patriarch of the Bush presidential family, so angered that both his son and grandson were denied re-election, placed a curse on the presidency, preventing all future office holders from winning a second term. Partially as a result of this series of one-termers, as of 2017, there are (including the incumbent) nine living Presidents, the most alive at the same time in national history. The aftermath of the Golden Gate Bridge bombing saw the passing of a decidedly more draconian PATRIOT Act, sparking protests in Washington. President George W. Bush's final year in office is notable for seeing the partial privatisation of social security (something historians now acknowledge as a contributing factor to the ongoing New Depression), as well as the onslaught Hurricane Lisa, a category 5 hurricane (far deadlier even than OTL's Katrina) which resulted in widespread destruction across Florida and Louisiana in August of 2004. Particularly affected by Hurricane Lisa was the city of New Orleans, where the Mercedez-Benz Superdome (which at the time, was being used as shelter for refugees), collapsed entirely, causing thousands of casualties.



The Bush administration's handling of Hurricane Lisa disaster relief efforts was met with much criticism, and is seen as a major contributor the President losing his bid for re-election to the Democratic ticket of South Carolina Senator John Edwards and House veteran Dick Gephardt. The 2004 Presidential Election was a gruelling one for both candidates, with one of its most shameful moments coming in September, after Elizabeth Edwards, wife of the Democratic candidate, revealed to the press that she had recently been diagnosed with breast cancer. For some Republicans, the timing of this announcement (less than six weeks before Election Day) was too coincidental, and with President Bush's approval ratings at an all time low, the right was getting increasingly desperate to smear the Edwards campaign with anything they could get their hands on. Within hours of these revelations, numerous Republicans (popularly nicknamed "tumor truthers") accused Mrs. Edwards of fabricating this disease in order to gain her husband sympathy votes in November, and demands that she produce an x-ray of her chest as evidence for her supposed illness were met with much hostility.



Despite the absurd allegations against his wife, John Edwards ultimately eked out a narrow victory over George Bush, and for the first couple years his term, was widely seen as a far more effective wartime leader than his predecessor. The Edwards administration oversaw two hotly contested amendments to the US Constitution: the 28th Amendment (which prohibits desecration of the American flag) in 2005, and the even more controversial 29th Amendment (which defined marriage in the United States as a union between a man and a woman), which passed by a single vote in 2006. After two successful years in office, the President's career was destroyed (shocker) by personal scandal: in early 2007, one of Edwards' advisors, a 43-year-old Indiana woman named Barbara Nelson, stepped forward, alleging that she and the President had been involved in an extramarital affair for the past eighteen months, and that she was now pregnant with his child.



Initially, President Edwards denied these allegations, but within days, several more White House staff members made similar claims. While memory of the Lewinsky scandal was still fresh in many American minds, the idea that the President could have engaged in affairs with numerous women while his wife battled a serious illness seemed almost unthinkable, but with mounting political pressure, Edwards agreed to take a paternity test, the results of which confirmed that he was indeed the father of Mrs. Nelson's unborn child. The House wasted no time in launching impeachment proceedings, and as though Edwards' reputation had not suffered enough, that summer, an illicit sex tape starring him and one of his secretaries was leaked online, where it has since been viewed tens of millions of times, giving Edwards the distinction of being the first POTUS who's junk has been exposed to an international audience. On 15 September, 2007, John Edwards was removed from office, with his former Vice President Dick Gephardt ascending to the presidency. Coincidentally, just a few hours after his removal, the ex-President's love child, Nicholas Nelson, was prematurely born with Down Syndrome.



In July 2008, less than a week after the bombing of Flight 404, there was a failed attempt at capturing al-Qaeda leader Osama bin Ladin, which resulted in the deaths of several American soldiers. This incident severely damaged the public image of President Gephardt, who was already seen as a weak and ineffectual leader, and he was easily defeated in November by the Republican ticket of Arizona Senator John McCain and former Arkansas Governor Mike Huckabee. Without a doubt, 2009 would prove to be the most challenging first year in office for any POTUS in recent memory. Mere weeks into McCain's presidency, the country saw the rapid onslaught of the highly deadly 2009 influenza pandemic (colloquially known as Mexican Flu), caused by a mutated strain of swine influenza virus first reported in Mexico, which is estimated to have caused more than 150,000 deaths in the United States alone (every 2000s kids remembers SpongeBob SquarePants face masks).



At the same time, the economy was suffering tremendously: although the money flowing in from Bush's social security privatisation initiative had delayed the inevitable, by March, the country had plunged into what is now called the New Depression, which America is still recovering from almost nine years later. Unemployment rose into the 20s, and as a result, the crime rate exploded in many large cities, and homelessness went way up. Hundreds of shantytowns, known as McCainvilles (named in "honour" of the sitting President) sprang up across the country (indeed, the large numbers of people living in such close proximity and in such poor conditions is one of the reasons why the Mexican Flu was so deadly). The worst years of the New Depression also saw an increase in politically-motivated violence (picture the alt-right with fewer memes, and a more-organized Antifa armed with more than just bike locks). European politics saw a wave of populism in the wake of the Depression, and the Eurozone has all but collapsed.



Amidst growing terrorism, worsening storms, economic depression and widespread disease, it is somewhat understandable that Mayan predictions for a 2012 apocalypse were taken far more seriously than OTL, and it wasn't long before countless doomsday cults cropped up across the United States, each kookier than the last. In September of that year, the nearby supergiant star Antares exploded in a supernova, which was easily visible from Earth in the daytime for months afterwards, appearing as bright as a full moon. The Antares event was seen by 2012 cultists as the final omen for the Earth's impending destruction, and in the following weeks, thousands of people had auctioned off all of their worldly possessions (which, given the current economy, often wasn't much). 21 December, 2012, the date of the supposed apocalypse, saw mass suicide on an unprecedented scale -- far greater even than the Jonestown massacre three decades prior (indeed, it is an oft-cited fact that vastly more Americans died by suicide on 12/21 than were murdered by Islamic terrorists throughout the entire 2000s decade).



The 2012 Presidential Election a landslide victory for Democratic candidate and former First Lady Hillary Clinton, who won almost 60% of the popular vote, the largest share won by any candidate in nearly 50 years. On the morning of 12 January, 2013, President John McCain died a famously undignified death (suffering a fatal stroke while sitting mid-dump on his White House latrine), which remains a source of amusement for his unending detractors years afterwards. With McCain's death ended one of the most controversial presidencies in recent history (although his standing has gone up in recent years). As a result of the unusual timing of his predecessor's death (just over a week prior to Clinton's inauguration), McCain's former VP, Mike Huckabee, currently holds the record for shortest presidency in United States history, serving for just eight days (William Henry Harrison, eat your heart out). The Clinton administration issued a crackdown on religious fanaticism in the wake of 2012's horror (dubbed by some as a "war on religion"), and oversaw a number of progressive reforms intended to mitigate the effects of the New Depression (with varying results). Clinton's third year in office also saw a landmark victory for gay rights: on 10 August, 2014, the 29th Amendment to the Constitution (which banned same-sex marriage on a federal level), was repealed by the 30th Amendment, which allows states to decide individually whether or not to permit gay marriage within their borders.



Clinton's presidency is often seen as the most successful of the 21st century (although she received some flack from conservatives after shedding tears during her speech in response to 2015's India-Pakistani nuclear exchange for allowing her, ahem, 'womanly emotions' to get the better of her during a time of crisis). Nonetheless, she and Vice President Tim Kaine were defeated in 2016 (despite winning the popular vote) by the Republican ticket of former Pennsylvania Senator Rick Santorum and South Carolina Senator Lindsey Graham, in one of the most contested elections in US history. America's 49th President, who faced much criticism for running on a populist and anti-immigration platform, is noted for being highly vocal about his skepticism of man-made climate change, which is perhaps an even bigger political issue than it is in OTL, given that sea levels are rising even faster than expected, and storms seem to grow more intense with each passing year (2017's Hurricane Irene having been both deadlier and costlier than Hurricane Lisa thirteen years prior). Santorum has also caused similar controversy due to his stances on LGBT issues, having been a major opponent of the repealing of the 29th Amendment, and publicly stating that Americans should "keep an open mind" toward gay conversion therapy. It's anyone's guess as to who will take on Santorum in 2020: Clintonites are eager for a rematch, while more progressive Democrats are hoping that Vermont Senator Bernie Sanders (who previously ran for the Democratic nomination in 2012, and earned an even larger following than in OTL) will throw his hat into the ring.



Organ waiting lists are far shorter, now that the little issue of transplant rejection has been solved - indeed, it is now possible for humans to receive a heart or a lung transplanted from a pig donor, with no negative side effects (aside from the endless jokes about cannibalism you'll endure any time you bite into a hot dog). Male pattern baldness can be genetically reversed, and corrective eyedrops (the far cheaper successor to laser-eye surgery) can grant perfect vision to anybody sighted. Dentures are a thing of the past, now that scientists have learned how to regrow adult teeth, quickly and inexpensively. Although vaping was never developed, cancer-free saferettes are now available, which are almost indistinguishable from regular cigarettes (four out of five smokers can't tell the difference). Unfortunately, saferettes are three times as expensive, and up to five times as addictive as cigarettes - additionally, saferette smokers tend to be stereotyped as judgemental towards those who still smoke so-called 'cancerettes'. Robotic exoskeletons are a common sight - on top of allowing the paraplegic to walk again, they've proven highly useful in numerous professions, such as in the industrial sector (where they have significantly reduced the amount of workplace accidents), as well as in the army and the (increasingly militarized) police force. The Columbia disaster never occurred, and (despite extensive budget cuts to NASA during the McCain era), the space shuttle remains in operation to this day.





While at first glance, the tech level of this world appears to be our world on steroids, some areas have lagged behind significantly, the most notable of which being communications technology -- social media has not taken off to nearly the same extent as OTL (quickly becoming associated with drug dealers, sexual predators, and Muslim extremists), with sites such as Friendster generally regarded as failed experiments by the few that even remember them, and anonymous online forums reign supreme. Similarly, with the death of Steve Jobs in 2002, the first smartphones weren't released till a few years later than OTL, by which time the New Depression had hit hard: even in 2017, smartphones remain something of a niche item, and with no SnapChat or Instagram, today's ultra-frugal youngsters can't see the appeal (besides, a cell phone you can't flip out? For real!? Totes whack, yo!!)



The existence of alien life is now common knowledge: in 2007, NASA's Spirit rover uncovered the remnants of long-dead Martian bacteria, sparking much discussion in the scientific community about the commonality of life in the universe. On 19 October, 2013, SETI discovered indisputable evidence of extraterrestrial intelligence in the form of a strong radio message, (dubbed simply ET-1), not unreminiscent of the Arecibo signal, originating from nearby star 72 Herculis. Two more exocivilizations were discovered through similar means around the stars Iota Persei and Beta Hydri (both of which were known to have Earth-sized planets orbiting within their habitable zones) in 2015 and 2016, respectively. Given the nature of their emissions, all three known exocivilizations are believed to be roughly around humanity's present level of technological advancement, although aside from some scattered clues deciphered from their signals, virtually nothing is known about their history and biology (if you were curious, none of our interstellar neighbours look much like us, based on their graphic figures -- indeed, the appearance of the sophonts inhabiting 72 Hercules c has earned them the unofficial name of the Mi-Go). Since the discovery of intelligent alien life, the number of reported UFO sightings have increased hugely. Similarly, a number of new religious groups based around alleged communication with humanity's star brethren have been established (and are being kept under close government surveillance).



While it is difficult to overstate the huge levels of excitement that have been generated from the confirmation that humans are not alone in the cosmos, this knowledge has left some scientists feeling rattled: after all, if intelligence is so common that four civilizations can exist within as little as 100 lightyears of each other, it begs the question, why don't we see any signs of more advanced species? This conundrum has led some to believe that the Great Filter almost certainly lies ahead of us rather than behind us, and the science fiction idea of advanced intelligences purging the galaxy of its sophont inhabitants is starting to be taken at least semi-seriously. The discovery of extraterrestrial intelligence has not had as big an impact on Earthly religion as one might think: although there have been countless arguments over whether or not ETs have souls, or if they go to the same heaven or hell as we do, the current Pope, John Paul IV, has publicly stated that aliens are just as much a part of God's creation as humans are. A notable subset of conspiracy theorists, known as xeniers, remain adamant that all evidence of extraterrestrial life (intelligent or not) is a hoax designed to discredit religion/promote a globalist agenda, although these people are given about as much credence as Flat Earthers are in OTL.



Pop culture is quite different: a few famous faces that our timeline has lost in the past decade or so are still alive and kicking, such as Steve Irwin, Robin Williams, Whitney Houston and Michael Jackson. On the other hand, there are some notable absences: pop sensation Britney Spears unfortunately died in a vehicular accident on 2 December, 2008, the evening of her 27th birthday, and in 2005, just a few weeks after the premiere of the third installment of the Star Wars prequel trilogy, director George Lucas was murdered by a crazed former fan (enraged with the direction the movies had taken), and no additions to the franchise have been made since. Star Trek: Enterprise was never cancelled, instead running for its intended seven seasons, as did Joss Whedon's Firefly (although given the quality of writing in its final few years, many fans wish it had ended a lot sooner). The adult animation industry is decidedly more barren, neither Family Guy nor Futurama having been revived after their respective cancellations (though Seth McFarlane was lucky enough to avoid Flight 11's doomed voyage in 2001, just eighteen months later, he was one of hundreds tragically killed in 2003's attack on the Golden Gate Bridge). South Park was canned after several showrunners were shot by an Islamic extremist who had taken offence at the show's depiction of the prophet Muhammad. Outside of the Toy Story series and a critically acclaimed sequel to Monsters, Inc., Pixar has not released any follow-ups to their films. Boy bands continue to roam the Earth, each more bland and corporate than the last. Mumble rap is non-existent, while a new and somewhat ironically named microgenre known as zen music (essentially blended remixes of classic electro overlaid with agonized screeching), has seen an explosion of popularity in recent years. Almost any franchise you can name has been given a darker, edgier reboot. Large streaming services never took off, and Blockbuster has managed to narrowly survive through the New Depression. While the discovery of extraterrestrial intelligence has led to a semi-resurgence of space opera, TV and movies are somehow even more saturated with superheroes than OTL.



Advertising is huge: in fact, with the employment rate as low as it is, a growing number of people have resorted to getting so-called bodverts (or adttoos), commercials in the form of corporate logos and slogans tattooed onto people's skin, for which they receive small sums of money. As a result of increased terrorism and political violence, many states have legalized the hugely controversial practice of microchipping known criminals. The anti-vaccination movement never really took off, although in its place, a surprising number of people (sometimes known as "anti-cells") still believe that mobile phones cause cancer. This phenomenon is thought to be primarily a result of a former child star passing away from an undiagnosed brain tumor in the mid-aughts, which her family claimed to have been linked to her constant cell phone usage, infamously suing the Nokia company in a much-publicized case. Yahoo! remains dominant, having purchased Google in 2002. Internet hackers are the new public enemies, and wide-scale cyberattacks are frequent and devastating.