NEW YORK, NY – RuPaul, legendary drag queen, recording artist, and gatekeeper for all things Fabulous, announced in a flurry of confetti and champagne that she would be putting her name in the snatch for the 2016 presidential race.

She will be running as a member of the Charisma, Uniqueness, Nerve, and Talent Party, whose platform is self-explanatory. In an initial press conference, Ru told reporters that she is “all about changing the game with some executive realness.” Confidant, mentor, and generally testy fashion icon Michelle Visage is set to serve as her VP (not that she cares) and the presidential hopeful will also be inviting the Pit Crew into her cabinet when she is elected.

She is already causing quite a stir with the other candidates: Donald Trump was reportedly upset after Ru tweeted regarding her competition, “you’d think a man with so much money could get a better wig, honey” and demanded she rescind the statement, to which she responded “I’m not gonna rupaulogize for that. And for the rest of the wealthy elite, I have 3 words for you: You. Better. Werk.” Republican presidential candidate Rand Paul immediately made a statement denouncing any familial connection to the drag queen, saying “I am in no way related to him. Her…RuPaul.” She further dismissed Republican competition by smiling coyly and saying “a Bush never looks good on the polls, either.”

When questioned about the number of somewhat ritualistic hours spent in front of her mirror and how it might impact her campaign, she tilted her absolutely flawless sequined cheekbones down at her absolutely flawless sequined gown and said “firstly, this is just some natural concealer. And secondly, if you don’t love yourself, how in the hell are you gonna love your country – can I get an amen?”