The fates—and our readers—have spoken. The semifinals for America's Ugliest Accent are here. Who's left? Two New England powerhouses, and two perennial contenders from the great state of Pennsylvania. Boston vs. Pittsburgh and Scranton vs. Providence: It's time to vote.

(As a loyal and dedicated former citizen of the commonwealth of Philadelphia, I hate to say you are all wrong, but thanks for nothing, voters.)

The semifinals begin today and voting will continue until Wednesday. At this point in the tournament, with only two more days to go, if you didn't see Philadelphia as the bracket's potential winner, might I suggest following Zachary Quinto down the path to ugliness by voting for Pittsburgh? I am not saying that I am biased but I am biased. As Gawker Staff Writer Allie Jones gloated, "That'll teach yinz."

Otherwise, you have Scranton, Boston, and Providence all ready to fight for their spot in the sun. Need a primer on each city? What, have we not done enough?

Boston (I hear it's nice there in the fall)

Pittsburgh (Has a bridge from which you can see the entire world (did not fact-check))

Scranton (Coal)

Providence (Home to a famous university and a guy who sells kettle corn on the street)

Just remember: vote proud, vote wide, but most of all: vote or die.

Boston vs. Pittsburgh

Scranton vs. Providence

[Image by Jim Cooke]