Some of us get great enjoyment from the uncontrollable brainfarts David Hogg disseminates on a daily basis. Others wish the weak-jawed boy wonder would bug off. Unfortunately for the latter, Hogg to be in our lives for a long time.

He has plans to run for Congress. Yes, really:

David Hogg, the 18-year-old school shooting survivor turned gun-control activist, says he’s gearing up to run for Congress when he’s constitutionally eligible. Hogg described his ideal seven-year plan, which culminates with him running for the House of Representatives when he’s 25. “I think I’ve come to that conclusion,” he told the magazine. “I want to be at least part of the change in Congress.” “Older Democrats just won’t move the f--- off the plate and let us take control. [House Minority Leader] Nancy Pelosi is old.” Hogg graduated high school in May and is taking a gap year before enrolling in college. But he says he plans to go to college in 2019 and “read a s--tload of books.”

That'll be the perfect campaign slogan for Davey. "Vote for Hogg. He's read a sh*tload of books." Hopefully, the Constitution will be one of the books among the sh*tload. I'd love to see the look on Dave's face when he gets to the Amendment Numero Dos.

Smug soyboy douchenozzles all across the land are raising their scrawny arms in the air in celebration. Finally, they'll get the representation they deserve.

Hoggy thinks he has it all figured out. America is in need of a chinless 80-pound savior who will save them from themselves by relieving them of their hand-cannons. Once he's done with his gap year, which has nothing to do with the multiple rejection letters he got, he'll set about saving the world.

Looks like Arianna Ornithology-Carbonite is going to have some stiff competition for most duncetastic leftist in D.C. 2026 is going to be hilarious.

Since we're talking the Hogginator:

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