Three suspected thieves have been apprehended in connection with what Port Hueneme police on Wednesday called a “heinous toilet paper caper.”

On Monday afternoon, a patrol officer was “rolling through” the Port City Plaza Shopping Center parking lot when he spotted an open alcoholic container near the front dashboard of an occupied vehicle, according to a Port Hueneme Police Department Facebook post.

The three people inside the car were all discovered to be on probation, prompting officers to search the vehicle.

What they found, police said in the cheeky Facebook post, “should make you flush with anger.”

Officers recovered 31 rolls of toilet paper, 27 tissue boxes, 31 towels of various sizes and four sets of bed sheets — all allegedly stolen from a maid’s cart at a local hotel, according to authorities.

The suspects tried to make a “clean getaway,” and police confirmed “they didn’t leave any skid marks when they fled the crime scene,” the post read.

Nevertheless, police nabbed the trio — a woman and two men — after the discovery of the items. They arrested Jessica Perez, 25, of Oxnard; Stephen Talley, Jr., 25, of Port Hueneme; and Tyson Castillo, 32 of Oxnard.

All could face petty theft charges in connection with the incident, according to police.

“We can’t be soft on crime when dealing with these dingle berries who’ll stop at nothing to clog our streets with this type of behavior,” the Facebook post stated.

With paper goods — but toilet paper in particular — in high-demand during the coronavirus pandemic, officials believe the items may have been eventually sold on the toiletry-market.

“We’re aware that this isn’t the crime of the century, but it’s a solid #2,” police joked.

They continued on a more somber note: “While we are trying to protect our public from price gouging and hoarding, it stinks that we have criminals trying to steal precious supplies from our local hotels.”