Okay, it’s officially been too long. Way too long… But there’s nothing I can do about it.

“One month”, Mark said. That’s what he predicted. One month on his own, and Zayne would come crawling back home.

Except it’s already been a month… More than a month. And Zayne still isn’t back.

I know I shouldn’t be freaking out like this, but I really can’t help it. He’s less than a twenty minute drive away, but we’ve barely seen him at all since he left… We don’t even hear from him much either. And any time I try to ask how he’s doing, his answers are always the same: “It’s fine.” “Not bad.” “Okay, I guess.” Really helpful, right?

I really hate prying or being nosy, so I’ve avoided asking Remi or River outright about what’s going on, but I’ve tried dropping a few hints every now and then. Unfortunately, they give me pretty much the same thing – “He’s fine.” “Everything’s good.” “We’ll keep him out of trouble.” Yeah, well if they’re anything like their Mama (and I know they are), I know their definition of ‘trouble’ is a lot different than mine.

I’m so desperate that I’ve even tried asking the girls what’s going on with him, but I guess he hasn’t really been talking to them much either. They’ve been giving me lots of shrugs and noncommittal answers… Which is frustrating. Has he really not been telling them how he’s doing? I mean, they see him at school every day. Or almost every day, I should say. Tony did say he’s been late or absent more than usual lately…

And the icing on the cake was when we got a call from his Chemistry teacher the other day about his grades. Apparently he failed his last two tests! Zayne has never exactly been a model student, but this really isn’t like him. So what the hell is going on? Is it too many hours at work? Has he been partying? Getting into trouble? Whatever it is, I doubt I’ll be hearing about it anytime soon. He doesn’t tell me anything anymore.

Even Mark doesn’t seem sure about this whole thing… Mark! He’s the calm one. The level-headed one. The one who talks me down and tells me everything will be okay… But not this time. “Everything will be fine” has turned into “We just have to wait and see” in a matter of weeks.

Could maman and Papa be right? Is this whole thing a mistake? It’s sure starting to feel like it. At least Oma and Opa have been more positive about it. They keep telling me I need to stop second-guessing myself and to ‘trust my instincts’.

But what happens if I’m not even sure what my instincts are saying anymore?

I guess there’s nothing we can do about it. We can’t exactly force him to come back home, short of essentially picking him up and dragging him back. Which already seems a little tempting…

But I know I can’t do that. I’ve gotta tough this thing out, and let Zayne learn from this. Mark’s right.

We just have to wait and see.