LONDON- The typical working day, with a 30 or 60 minute lunch break, is the perfect amount of time to get over a hangover, it has been revealed.

Experts say that not only is the amount of time ideal, but the structure of the day lends itself perfectly to the task of grotty self-loathing that is hangover survival.

John Ramsbottom, a Imbibologist, told us:

“What is fantastic about the working day, and crucial to recovering from a hangover, is the break in the middle. This means that somebody clawing themselves out of a booze-based pit of despair can do so for around 4 hours, before dragging themselves out into the fresh air and gorging on disgusting food, which helps with the healing. They can then spend the afternoon feeling slightly better, in time to go back out for more drinks.”

Jane Pilchard, a tedious middle-manager, explained how she utilises this structure to abate her hangovers.

“Usually, I get in on time, or even a bit early because I’m still full of the nervous energy that comes with the latent booze sloshing around my system. Then I’ll have a couple of coffees in the office to try and take the edge off, which is about the same time that the headache kicks in and I try and pick at a croissant without vomiting.”

When asked about the effect of the lunch break, she added:

“Yeah, the break in the middle is really helpful. I’ll normally get a sausage and egg sandwich to get some grease into my stomach and I try to eat it outside on my own, because this is the part of the day when my paranoia is peaking, so if people watch me eat, I’ll start to hyperventilate.”

Mark Dunton, a procurement manager for a leading carpet firm confirmed the theory.

“Lunch is the first time that I can smoke again too. If you don’t count the one in bed which I have to put out because I wretch too much. Then, the afternoon is four hours of toil where I might venture to chat with a colleague in the office canteen and see if they’re up for a drink. By 5pm I’m feeling well enough to meet my friends at the pub. The first pint’s a struggle, but then, when isn’t it?”

Experts have yet to confirm the effects that this work-based recovery is having on the economy, but with alcohol sales at a record high, it’s likely to be positive.