I believe people should be required to hold two types of jobs before entering whatever workforce they may be destined for. 1) Restaurant worker 2) Retail slave. These jobs, though occasionally viewed as mundane, (THEY’RE NOT I HAVE WORKED BOTH) will teach you the importance of being kind to one another. That being said, I will now dive head first into my views on why “The customer is usually wrong.”

THIS. This is how my day usually starts. After I’ve had a pretty good morning of pre-work, music filled, serenity I am greeted once again by the upturned noses of the American public.

Newsflash: Y’not special!

I feel that, for whatever reason, we as a society have somehow had it engrained into our psyche that we deserve to be waited on hand and foot. Why? Have we suffered so greatly as a species? Is there some unwritten code that I’m unaware of? Was that in the indecipherable section of the Rosetta Stone? The 13th Commandment? “Thou shalt get everything thou desires if a big enough hissy fit is thrown…eth.”

Seriously. Why is this the attitude of almost every person that shops anywhere? Stop me if I’m wrong, (actually, don’t stop me. I’m on a roll.) if this is just a “Midwest” thing let me know.

I think it’s the typical attitude because companies have let it become the typical attitude. Before you get all up in arms let me explain; people thrive on being “right”, it’s a euphoric feeling when you come out on top and you believe you have bested your opponent. Humans thrive on “winning”.

Unless you’re me, in which case you never win at anything and have thus given up buying scratch off tickets and playing HORSE with the garage door down, (because your family is generally concerned about the well-being of the garage door).

But yes, people get off on being right. Even when it means that you’ve “bested” a 16 year old who is only trying to do her job that she has somehow secured in a less than ideal job market. Being right makes pompous people happy, and happy pompous people shop more. Companies make more money when people get their way, however how much is this costing them in turnover rates from employees? The Sasha Corporation (a company out of Cincinnati specializing in customer service and employee retention see here) discovered that the average cost to replace an $8 an hour employee ranged between $5,505 – $9,444.

Excuse me?

Maybe it’s because I think $5 is a lot of money, but those numbers just sound INSANE. I am completely baffled by those results, yet many companies aren’t changing the age old mantra of “The customer is always right.”

Now, I’m not saying that shitty customers are the sole cause of employee turnover, but you have to realize that it is probably a rather large contributor. I’ve wanted to leave many a job because people are assholes, and most human beings have some semblance of a breaking point.

The majority of companies seem to concentrate on one side of satisfaction: the customer. They think if the customer is happy, then the whole operation will run smoothly.

Wrong.

If a car’s wheels turn, it doesn’t mean the entire car will function to today’s standards now does it?

All pieces must work together in order to succeed, or everything will come crashing down. I believe the changes should begin with how customers are treated. If we treated customers more like humans and friends and less like ethereal beings and gods, then maybe the economy would benefit as well as everyone’s brains and hearts.

(I should’ve put this post into list format, but I’m trying to veer away from my OCD tendencies)

Let me tell you, I love any establishment I walk into where one of the first things I see is a big ‘ol sign that says: “We reserve the right to refuse service to anyone*.” Translation: “If you feel the need to be an asshole, there is the door.”

I put an asterisk because this can be taken too far, like the instance not too long ago where someone was refused service at a restaurant because of their sexuality. That teeters on the very line between discrimination (because it was), and the fact that it was a privately owned business so they technically could refuse service….but it was still wrong because there are laws against discriminatory behavior based on race, religion, sexual orientation, national origin, etc. and those laws are there for a reason.

There is, however, no law to protect you if you are an asshole.

You can help being an asshole. You can’t help being African American, gay (don’t even start with me), or from New Zealand.

Anyway, back to my point. I wish every establishment displayed that sign. I think the public needs to be knocked down a couple of pegs. Just because you come to shop in my store, doesn’t mean that you are better than I

Bottom line: I. Do. Not. Work. For. You.

The days of slavery in our country are gone. There’s a reason: it doesn’t work, and it’s morally absurd.

You don’t “deserve” anything. You work hard for what you get, and you treat others with respect. Just because you wear a three piece suit to work doesn’t make you any better than the homeless man you pass on your way into your office building. We’re all just ash in the end, don’t waste your time being a jerk.

Which brings me back to my first picture on this post. For god sake where has every form of social courtesy gone?! Attention everyone: I did not physically drag you to the mall and make you shop. You did it all on your own so don’t give me that look when I say, “Good Morning!”

It’s not that hard.

This is how it should go:

Me: Good Morning!

You: Good Morning!

Me: How are you?

You: Just swell, how about you?

Me: I’m great, thank you! How can I be of assistance?

However, you the customer seem to make it hard and it ends up going more like this…

Me: Good Morning!

You:

Settle down, Satan.

Would it physically kill you to just converse with the worker you happen upon? We aren’t all aggressive workers just fishing for a sale.

Also, when did “just looking” become an emotion? Does that rank up with “melancholy” or “happy” because I must have missed that one when I was in school.

Me: Hey guys, how are ya?

You: JUST LOOKING!!!!!!!

Me:

Just answer. I know that from a personal perspective, I use a lot of energy to converse with customers on a daily basis. I’m introverted by nature and tend to enjoy lagging back and observing opposed to being on the front lines. Therefore, I would like a little conversation or just basic respect in return.

Sadly, I’ve given up on expecting it.

Sadly, I’m actually shocked whenever someone stops to talk with me.

This is what our society has come to. A bunch of consumers who are solely focused on one thing: More.

More products, more being right, more stuff.

That’s fine, just give me a little more respect.

And pick up after yourselves!

Then, once we’ve passed the actual barrier of human conversation, the complaints start.

Oh, you’ve ignored me this entire time but now you have something to bitch about so suddenly I’m REAL and can be SEEN.

Let me preface this by saying: We do not control the amount of product. That is basic supply and demand.

“Your employee says you’re out of this.”

“That’s because we are.”

“Why?”

“Because we sold them all.”

Our jobs are to sell stuff. If we are out of something that means we are doing our job.

Yay us.

Just because you didn’t come and get something fast enough doesn’t mean it’s my fault. Again, I don’t control when you do or do not shop.

“Well I’ve been working!”

Shocker. Me too.

Also: We do not control the price of products. The end.

“This is too expensive!”

Yeah, too bad that just taking it is called theft which is just a no-no.

So we’ve gone through getting to know each other, gone through your anger at us for various things that are usually out of our control, now that you’ve huffed and puffed it’s time for you to pay.

And here come the coupons.

I don’t really mind coupons, I use them when I can, who doesn’t like to save a dollar on dish soap or buy a McMuffin and get one for free? When you come at me with expired coupons, or tell me you left them at home, is when I actually have an issue.

If your coupon is expired, it is no longer good.

“This coupon expired in February but I couldn’t get in here.”

“Ma’am it’s May…”

“Well it’s not my fault it expired!!!!”

It’s also not mine. Blame the progression of time, I really have no idea how you would like me to deal with this.

If you use an expired coupon it is the equivalent of hand drawing “$10 off” with crayons on the back of a cheeseburger wrapper and trying to pass it off as a valid coupon. It’s also as if you brought me a coupon to Victoria’s Secret and tried to use it in my store.

It’s not going to work.

“I’ve been shopping here for years!”

Then you should know our rules by now.

Oh you’re going to scream and fume because the stars didn’t align perfectly for you? You didn’t get your way?

Damn shame.

Also, “I left my coupon at home, do you have anymore?” Is pretty much like saying, “I left my money at home, do you have any?”

…..Out.

When I get down to it, I guess what I’m trying to say is that we as consumers could benefit from a little swift kick in the rear. Products aren’t entitlements, the workers aren’t little errand boys and girls, they’re just people trying to make it in the world like everyone else. Our dollars would go further, and our lives would be a little happier, if everyone would just calm down a bit.

And humans make mistakes. Honestly.

“If people don’t shop you won’t have a job!” Thank you, Captain Obvious. I know that. I’m glad people shop, I’m thankful that they do, I just think there are better ways to go about it.

“Where do you work?” I’m not answering because I like the anonymity of it all. You know I work at a children’s store and that’s all you need to know. It really is wonderful, though.

“Why don’t you just get another job?” Because I do really love my job, and this is where I feel I should be. I do love the people. And no, not everyone acts like the scenarios described above. People are nice, kind, fun…I just think on average that people need to be a little kinder to each other.

Because what if that was your kid?

What if the worker you’re screaming at about something that is totally out of their control was your kid?

I bet you’d be mad.

That’s just it. A lot of retail workers are kids. Kids trying to get by, to get through school, to become doctors or lawyers. You wouldn’t walk into a doctor’s office and demand a lower copayment, would you? Or yell at your lawyer because you didn’t like a law? Then don’t do it to the people working in malls and other stores.

Because one day they might be your doctor or lawyer.

And it’d really suck if they held a grudge.

Until next time!

xoxo,

Jillie