Everyone remembers the 2007 Brit awards for Devon-raised Joss Stone’s sudden transformation into a purple-haired American teenager, but what you might not remember is that she was there to present an award to gravel-voiced troubadour James Morrison, who you also might not remember. Well, the pair recently reunited for the abysmal My Love Goes On, the video to which sees another reunion, this time between pop and the gloriously unimaginative music video theme “in the recording studio”.

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Up there in the “will this do?” video stakes with “live montage” or, heaven forbid, “animated”, the authentic “in the studio” visual is littered with recurring tropes. My Love Goes On showcases most of them, from James and Joss staring blankly at a mixing desk, to clumsily fingering instruments and scribbling out lyrics on a pad. It harks back to the hallowed days of 2012 and the video for One Direction’s ode to women’s flaws, Little Things, which features the lads – shot in black and white, obviously – surrounded by untouched studio detritus. While not a music video, Dua Lipa’s similarly muted online teaser for current single Swan Song also features a studio set-up and a lyric sheet, with Dua changing a line involving diamonds with a flick of her pen.

Another classic staple of the genre is oversized headphones. They appear in the Paul Thomas Anderson-directed Haim videos, the sort of visuals that scream “AUTHENTICITY” so loudly you can barely hear the songs, and they pepper two absolute gems of the genre in the shape of Mariah Carey’s 1995 Boyz II Men collaboration One Sweet Day and her 2000 duet with Westlife, Against All Odds. The former is like a glossy advert for cushioned audio wear, with Carey employing the experimental one ear on, one ear off headphone technique (pictured below).

In 2000’s low-budget remake, Mariah turns up to the studio in a private jet while Westlife seem to arrive by coach (leaving later in a taxi). Once inside, we get slow tracking shots of the printed-out lyrics, the mixing desk and, brilliantly, a closeup of a cassette tape featuring a rough mix of the song that Mariah then listens to on a yacht. (We know it’s a rough mix because it says “ROUGH” on it in big red letters.) At the two-minute mark, we’re back in the studio with everyone congregated on a battered sofa for what looks like a fan meet and greet, the shot fading out just as Brian appears to glance at Mariah’s chest (weirdly the same shot is used again at the end).

Superficially revealing, the purposefully low-key “in the studio” video is as gloriously fake as any high-concept musical short film. The dodgy brilliance of it, however, lies in the pretence, the terrible acting and, in Mariah’s case, trying to work out if she has any idea who Westlife are.

• This article was amended on 1 May 2019. Joss Stone was raised in Devon, not born there as originally stated. She was born in Dover, Kent.