Star-Spangled Spatula: Cook Like A Patriot

Who says you can’t celebrate patriotism in the kitchen? The next time you throw down to make some good ol’ Murican breakfast of bacon, eggs and hash browns, cook it with the Star-Spangled Spatula.

Hand-fabricated by old-school (as in, from the 1800s) cutlery manufacturers Lamson and Goodnow, the Jacob-Riley Wasserman design features a likeness of the American flag perforated onto the blade. That way, you can toss and turn your porkchops like a real patriot — the way your great grandfathers always envisioned for their future generation.

The Star-Spangled Spatula measures 19.5 x 4.2 inches, so it should be just as functional as every burger-flipper and frying pan scraper in your kitchen. It features a handle crafted from solid walnut, with a blade cut in stainless steel. We’re guessing this can double as a good stencil, too, in case you ever fancy spray chalking small American flags in your bedroom walls or something (we’re just not sure how hygienic it will be for cooking after that, but YOLO).

Perfect for flipping dogs and burgers at your next tailgate while you play with firecrackers and down brewskies with your buds, the Star-Spangled Spatula is available now, priced at $65.