“I would understand if Trump made mistakes, right, if this whole thing was off the cuff. But how is it possible to get so many things wrong in a prewritten speech? This is crazy! Watching an Oval address shouldn’t be a game of Two Truths and a Lie.” — TREVOR NOAH

“[imitating Trump] Please remember, very important for all countries and businesses to know, nothing I say is true, pay no attention to the man behind the bronzer.” — STEPHEN COLBERT

“OK, first of all, it isn’t a foreign virus. It’s just a virus, OK? Trump makes it sound like corona doesn’t speak English.” — TREVOR NOAH

“During his address, Trump said starting Friday people from Europe can’t fly to the U.S. He was like, ‘We have to stop the virus so instead of everyone flying here, I want everyone to take a cruise.’” — JIMMY FALLON

“And, also, we can blame Europe for many things — colonialism, skinny jeans, Piers Morgan — but this virus is worldwide, all right? It was going to get here no matter what Europe did.” — TREVOR NOAH

“I’m sorry, what? The U.K. is fine because it’s got ‘the border’? Other countries in Europe also have ‘the border,’ unless maybe — does he mean the water? Is that it? What, does Trump think the coronavirus doesn’t know how to swim? Because that’s racist.” — TREVOR NOAH

“But Trump wanted to give a speech to reassure the nation that everything is going to be OK, and I think it worked. Today the stock market only dropped 2,000 points.” — JIMMY FALLON