The ever-#NeverTrump Washington Post will not rest until it tracks down every penny Trump never gave to charity. But their digging has unearthed perhaps the worst coverup since “my dog ate my homework” accompanied by a self-chewed blank sheet of notebook paper.

Trump paid a $2,500 slap-on-the-wrist fine to the IRS for illegally paying $25,000 to a group supporting Florida Attorney General Pam Bondi in 2013. Not only did they make a political payoff from a charity foundation (a no-no), but they also hid it from the IRS.

Trump’s excuse:

The name of the pro-Bondi group is “And Justice for All.” Trump’s staffer saw that name in the book, and — mistakenly — cut the check from the Trump Foundation. The group in the book was an entirely different charity in Utah, unrelated to Bondi’s group in Florida. Somehow, the money got to Florida anyway. Then, Trump’s staffers said, the foundation’s accounting firm made another mistake: It told the IRS that the $25,000 had gone to a third charity, based in Kansas, called Justice for All. In reality, the Kansas group got no money. “That was just a complete mess-up on names. Anything that could go wrong did go wrong,” Jeffrey McConney, the Trump Organization’s controller, told The Post last week. After The Post pointed out these errors in the spring, Trump paid a $2,500 penalty tax.

Oh, right. Trump’s family foundation, to which he has donated nothing since 2008, employs only Trump, his kids, and one staffer. Nobody else can tell a clerk to “cut a check.”

Don’t try to get me to believe that Trump’s trusted staffers, who have access to his checkbook, just follow some procedure by looking up charity names in a book. I’d sooner believe that the Duke Brothers paid Clarence Beeks $50,000 for “special projects.”

We’re really in the theater of the absurd territory here. Of course it was a political payoff, because Bondi was about to investigate Trump University claims. Check received, investigation never happened. Quid pro quo.

But the Trump Organization told the IRS “what donation? You mean the one to Kansas–I mean Utah? Oh that wasn’t to Bondi.” Somehow, magically Bondi got the money. “What a mess-up, gee, we are just such boo-boo-heads today.” I don’t think that excuse would hold up in third grade, never mind any prosecutor’s office.

One candidate for president treats classified information like it’s passing notes in middle school, and the other thinks voters are all idiots. Have I told you that I hate this year?