dflynn:

Aries: “I recognized a lot of the actors in this movie, but my IMDb app wasn’t working so I couldn’t look anybody up! It would just open for one second and then crash!”

Taurus: “I felt very emotional when the wife died! I got into a pretty bad car accident about six months ago, but thankfully everyone was okay!”

Gemini: “Seeing Mel Gibson in movies makes me very uncomfortable due to his racist and sexist comments! My father is like him, and we no longer speak”

Cancer: “I fell asleep at one point! That’s no knock on the movie, I’m studying to become a Dental Hygienist right now and the hours are really crazy!”

Leo: “The aliens looked dumb! My friend Garrett recently asked me if I believe that aliens exist, but I told him that I haven’t made my mind up about that!”

Virgo: “My dog Rocky knocked my drink over so I missed about five minutes in the middle while I was dealing with that!”

Libra: “I already watched this movie last week on cable, and it was very boring to watch it again so soon!”

Scorpio: “Here’s your copy of Signs back! Sorry, I didn’t get around to watching it but I’m leaving the country for a few months to help my Aunt track down her cousin who fought in World War II! I think that makes him my first cousin once removed!”

Sagittarius: “My name is Debra Andrews-Cohen and this wasn’t Shyamalan’s best, but it was far from his worst!”

Capricorn: “I made popcorn and about an hour after the movie I felt a stabbing pain in my stomach! I looked at the popcorn box and it said ‘Serve by 08/13!’ I was very nervous that I’d throw up, but I felt fine the next morning!”

Aquarius: “I can’t figure out how to adjust the EQ’s on my surround sound, so the music is much louder than the dialog! I kept having to turn it down and then turn it back up! Why don’t they just make everything the same volume?”

Pisces: “I like the way the title looks on the cover, even though the ‘g’ looks a little too much like a lower-case q!”