When I started putting this together, I had no idea Snowpocalypse 2014 Part Two was coming this week and might be worse than Part One. So, consider this advice you can use when the weather starts freaking out Tuesday.

The problem is that we Houstonians don't really know what to do when ice is on the road. In August, we waltz around outside like it's 70 degrees outside. But, the first little snow that falls, the whole damn city shuts down. Follow some simple rules, and we'll all survive the next Snowpocalypse, even if it comes Tuesday.

5. It's not the snow. It's the ice.

Snow is pretty and something we all like to idealize. The snow we get here generally melts on contact with the ground, so it has little or no impact on us other than making us all stop dead in our tracks to snap photos. The problem for us is the ice that accumulates on bridges and overpasses. As you might imagine, it's slippery. Driving on it is dangerous. Try to remember.

4. Sarcasm isn't in short supply.

There were an impressive number of photos of tiny icicles tagged with #Snowpocalypse on Twitter and Instagram. If there is one thing we can all appreciate during a weather event, it's a good joke about the weather event. I'm sure our Yankee friends at least respected the sense of humor if not the terror over a little ice on the road.

3. Don't go on the freeway.

There were something like 113 accidents before 9 a.m. last Thursday. The vast majority of them were on the freeway, many of them due to the ice on overpasses. Your best bet during these rare times of winter weather is to stay away from the freeway...as far away as possible.

2. People really should stay home.

This can be very difficult for those who have to work, but if there is any way for you to take a day off, do it. There is no point in risking your safety and the safety of others by getting on the road and driving through the crappy weather. Stay in bed under a blanket or make the world's tiniest snowman.

1. We are wusses.

Houstonians freak out when it rains, so when there is weather below freezing, it shouldn't come as a surprise that we have no clue what to do. But, still. It's like sheer panic out there. People up north drive through this crap three or four months of the year. We can't take one day every three or four years?