There’s Christian hypocrisy… and then there’s Martin Kofi Danso, who did all the things Jesus says you can’t do, then just kept going.

Who is Martin Kofi Danso?

He’s the senior pastor at Miracle Arena For All Nations (a church in Toronto, Ontario), a self-proclaimed “prophet,” and husband to the other senior pastor JoAnne Danso. They have four daughters.

Is he rich?

Only in God’s love. Also, cash.

What the hell did this guy do?

He sued a former member of his congregation, Chris-Ann Bartley, because she lied and said he was the father of her child.

Did she really lie?

Danso admitted in an affidavit, “I did not have sexual relations with the respondent.” So this is a pretty serious he-said-she-said…

Can’t we clear this up with a paternity test?

Yes we can! And that’s why Danso asked Bartley to let him take a paternity test. Part of his lawsuit was a request to keep the proceedings sealed so no one would know he was involved in this case. That might ruin his reputation and his “significant commercial/financial interests.”

Did the silencing work?

I told you his name, didn’t I?

Why didn’t the silencing work?

Because the paternity test revealed he was 99.999996% the father of this baby. (He was “shocked” by this, the judge later said.)

Also, that other thing.

What other thing?

Turns out he told her to have an abortion.

Also, that other thing.

What other thing?

According to Bartley, Danso told her if she went through with the pregnancy, God would kill her. The Lord had given him that vision.

Did she die during childbirth?

Nope!

Yikes… I guess he learned an important lesson about one-night stands.

It wasn’t one night. Bartley actually gave the judge proof that “they had an ongoing intimate relationship from the fall of 2014 until the end of May, 2017.”

What proof?

Text messages. Lots of them.

So Danso’s admitting his mistake now, right?

Not a chance. Now he’s changing his story and saying Bartley “seduced” him.

Jesus…

That’s right. Thanks to Jesus, he’ll be able to think about what he’s done on his private jet.

A private jet?!

Yep. His congregation gave it to him as a birthday gift two years ago. He wasn’t surprised though. He had a vision that God was going to give him a plane for his birthday.

If God told him about the plane, why didn’t God warn him about the embarrassment he’d face because of this lawsuit?

Mysterious ways, obviously.

(Image via Facebook. Thanks to Kyle for the link)

