Part one of a series that will see me shamelessly copy/pasting from other sites those nuggets of masculinist wisdom – collectively becoming known as ‘the red pill’ – that are worth preserving and passing on. As mainstream media and culture turns against these expressions of male desire, I think it is important that they are propagated as widely as possible.

A post by ‘Ghost Rider’ from here: http://www.mgtowhq.com/viewtopic.php?f=2&t=3987

I joked in another thread about the First Rule of Cupcake Club. I have a bit of time on my hands this evening so I thought I would expand on it a bit from experience, plus watching and reading about cupcakes. This is what I surmise are the Rules of Cupcake Club in order for cupcakes to best manipulate men for their own gain:

Rule 1: Never reveal the cock count to any man whose wallet you are trying to attach to. Most men will figure you’ve been with a few guys, thinking boyfriends plus a couple of one night stands. If asked, always undercount, by a lot. If the man presses for an actual count – I know, it is surprising, since he should feel lucky that you’ve even shown any interest in him, let alone letting him fuck you, say the following to boost his ego: “Oh baby, I’ve only been with like 3 or 4 guys that were really special to me. But none of them made me feel like you.” This will make you seem special to him and help to entice him to commit his wallet to you. He doesn’t need to know that you’ve been used by more cocks than the urinals at a major beer-fest. Unless he’s one of the few guys into porn stars or prostitutes, you don’t want him to think about all the cocks that have been there before him as that may cause him to be obstinate in committing his wallet to your service. Your cock count should only be shared with your closest girlfriends when comparing notes, or if you are done with your current wallet, either trading up to a thicker wallet or getting with that bad boy you’ve been fucking on the side, tell him so he will be destroyed and it will be easier to scrape him off (make sure you tell him he was never good enough for you in the sack, unlike all those other men).

Rule 2: Never tell your wallet about any of your wild sexual adventures or non-standard sex. He might want to have some of those adventures, or try some of that non-standard sex, but he’s not worthy, that stuff is reserved for your alpha boyfriend, which you are willing to do in order to keep the alpha boyfriend happy so he doesn’t dump you for some other cupcake.

Rule 3: Nothing is ever your fault. It is always a mistake that was caused by a man. Had an affair? Your husband’s fault for not giving you the gina tingles, or being away, or not making you feel sexy, etc. Made a mistake at work? Doesn’t matter how big it was, it was the patriarchy discriminating against you because you are a strong, independent, empowered woman. Had a car accident? It was the man’s fault for running that green light while you were busy posting that sexy selfie, making a Facebook update, or texting that hot alpha that you want to bang. Whatever it is, look for a man to blame because you are perfect special snowflake and never do anything wrong.

Rule 4: When enticing a man to enter into a relationship beyond a one night stand, become a chameleon and adopt whatever will get him interested. This can be hobbies, political outlook, sports, pretending to enjoy sex with him whenever he wants it, whatever makes him think you are special and he needs you in his life. You don’t have to do it any more, once his wallet is committed to you.

Rule 5: Deny everything. Never admit to anything that might put you in a bad light or make you seem less than angelic. Even if caught red handed, always say “it isn’t what it looks like.” For example: your wallet walks in while your thug boyfriend is balls deep in you, just say “it isn’t what it looks like, I had just gotten out of the shower and was getting ready to use a bobby pin to put my hair up when I accidentally swallowed it and started choking on it. This nice man came in to give me the Heimlich manoeuvre, but that didn’t work, so he helpfully started trying to knock it out of me from behind.” Or your male boss catches you stealing from the till. “It isn’t what it looks like. I was putting the money up for safekeeping so some thief couldn’t steal it.” In short, come up with the most plausible excuse to cover for what you are doing. If they press the issue, change the subject. Scream and cry about how they don’t understand you, that it is that time of the month, that the world is just plain mean to women, etc.

Rule 6: Never keep your promise once you get what you want. Men should be thankful that you even deigned to acknowledge them – because you are just so awesome. Their expectation of you keeping your promises is just tacky and gauche.

Rule 7: Unless in wallet seeking mode, never give your vagina to a man who wants to please you, who listens to you, who is nice to you, etc. These men are only for using to get free stuff or do things for you. It is easier to manipulate them with the prospect that they might get “lucky”, but always leave them with blue balls. If you give them your vagina, they might think they are in a relationship with you and that could make your use of them awkward.

Rule 8: Always give your vagina to an alpha thug if he wants it, regardless of your relationship status. However, if you have a wallet at home, be discrete if you aren’t ready to lose it. These men will treat you like shit, never listen to you, don’t care about your feelings, and fuck skanks with abandon, but they are exciting, mysterious, and a bit (possibly a lot) dangerous, setting the old gina tingling. Gina tingles take precedence over everything – so never resist them, just fuck the guy without a thought or care.

Rule 9: Never have sympathy or empathy with your wallet. He is a tool, nothing more. If you divorce him, fuck him as hard as you can. Take as much of his stuff as you can, try to get most of his money, and minimize his time with any kids you might have had together. He is no longer worthy of your consideration or vagina. Doesn’t matter what he did for you in the past, it is just that, in the past. He is no longer useful except what you can squeeze out of him.

Rule 10: Emotion trumps facts, logic, and science. It doesn’t matter what the facts are. It doesn’t matter what logic says. Even if they are uncouth enough to bring up science, it doesn’t matter. What you feel trumps everything. If they argue otherwise, throw a huge shit fit and bring up every grievance you can think of. What you want, how you want, and when you want should be all that matters.

Rule 11: Never talk about Cupcake Club with men. They don’t need to know our secrets. It would be better for us if we kept them in the dark. Might be hard to get them to “man up” and marry us when we are ejected from the cock carousel with the baby rabies and hitting the wall.

Rule 12 (initial concept courtesy centurion 2000): Once married, if the relationship isn’t going well, say you need some space. Move to a state that has draconian divorce laws, THEN pull the trigger. That way you can maximize your payout. As a bonus, if children are involved, you can minimize his interaction with his children since chances are lower that he will be able to move in order to be closer to them. Then you can tell him what a shitty father he is because he doesn’t see his children more.

Rule 13 (initial concept courtesy toadman): There is no Cupcake Club, speaking amidst potential wallet-bait. However, if need be, you can bring it up obliquely if you are utilizing Rule 14 and hoping to convince your potential wallet that you are NAWALT. “Hey, baby, there might be Cupcake Club Rules out there, but I wouldn’t know anything about it because I’m NAWALT and nothing at all like those other women. Let me show you my shiny unicorn horn. By the way, how thick is that wallet you are going to share with me?” BUT, if you are not in wallet seeking mode, then “shut your hole, bitch! It’s our dirty little secret, ladies.”

Rule 14 (initial concept courtesy DruidV): The NAWALT Rule. If in wallet seeking mode, always say NAWALT and, if you can pull it off, act NAWALT. Men are desperately looking for NAWALTs so use it to your maximum advantage. Once you have convinced your potential wallet into believing he has found a unicorn it will encourage him to allow you to attach to his wallet. Once attached, you can drop the act and go back to AWALT as it will be too late for him to do anything about it. Acting like a NAWALT is the most effective strategy to land the wallet you have your sights set on.

Rule 15: Regardless of how unattractive you are, whether looks, weight, personality, mentally, spiritually or a combination of them (all of them for our dear radical feminist sisters), you deserve a top 20% man. If however, you have to settle for a man among the less desirable 80%, settle for the man with the thickest wallet. That way when you dump him later on to pursue your top 20% man, you can maximize your cash and prizes. As a bonus, if you give birth during the marriage, the kids don’t necessarily have to be his, he just has to believe they are, you can increase your income stream even further, at least until the youngest turns 18, possibly even 26 depending upon circumstances. You don’t need to even spend any of that money on the kids, you can always gouge him for more. If he baulks at buying whatever it is you want the kids to have, you can always tell him what a shitty father he is.

Rule 16: Make sure you tell your kids what a terrible man and father the wallet is. You want to alienate them from the father so that they are yours to manipulate and exploit for your own goals. If you’re good at it, you can even use the kids to get even more money out of the father’s wallet. If the kids get the wrong idea that you might be the problem, they won’t be available for you to use and manipulate later in life and you might be left having cats to keep you company because the kids never come to visit you.

Rule 17: Always bad mouth your exes to your potential wallet, telling him that they took advantage of you, were jerks, how you did everything while they did nothing, etc. Utilizing Rule 14 here would be a good idea to make it seem lucky that you are available. If you put on the NAWALT act well enough to earn an Oscar, he might even go into protector mode since he believes you got a raw deal from your exes and he won’t let that happen to you again. In this case, you will gain maximum exploitation rights as he’s willing to do anything for you to make sure you don’t get hurt again because he isn’t like those other guys and willing to prove it. As a bonus, you probably don’t have to sleep with him yet as he doesn’t get your motor running, and you want him to think that you’re a good girl, not a slut. But you might have to grease the trap sometime with sex because he does have a wallet you want to attach to and the fastest way to get attached is offering sex to a thirsty beta simp. At no time during the wallet dance do you want him to focus on how come all those other guys couldn’t make a relationship work with you, especially if you have several failed marriages under your belt. He might start to think the problem is with you and not the men. That is a disastrous line of thought when trying to land a wallet and must be stamped out at all costs. Afterwards, he can figure it out, but it will be too late by then.

Rule 18: If you are in a social lull where the wallets aren’t currently interested in you and the bad boys are done pumping and dumping you for the moment, make sure you tell everyone how awesome being single is, that you enjoy it and don’t need a man around. Publicly be happy and go lucky. If you have kids, make sure you let the men out there know how much they are missing by not being involved in a single mother’s life. This can be done on Facebook, Twitter, Blogs, etc. Behind the scenes, you can be as cynical, bitter, nasty, and miserable as you want, but keep it contained that only close girlfriends and family see it. Anyone else sees it, they might be scared away. The key is you will lure more wallets in with honey than vinegar. Wallets might think they’ll be getting all this good stuff you are projecting and might actually commit because they wrongfully believe the superficial is the reality. You might have to utilize Rule 14 extensively in order to get him to commit his wallet. Once that is done, you can go back to your cynical, miserable, nasty, bitter, bitchy self as it will be too late for the wallet.

Rule 19: Jobs and money need to be handled by particular circumstances. In all cases, your money is yours to use as you see fit, he shouldn’t have any access to it. His money becomes our money and should be open for your use as well. All major expenses (cars, houses, vacations, remodelling, any other major expense) should be handled by his funds, regardless of who benefits from it. Here are the most common scenarios that occur.

Rule 19a: If you have a job, spend every dime you make on clothes, make-up, trinkets, decorations, shoes, and other useless stuff. You want your wallet to think you’re broke so he takes on all the bills, leaving you free to spend your money on what you want. If he is ungallant and asks you to help pay some bills, throw a fit using Rule 10 how emotions, “I feel that I need my money to pay for all my useless stuff” trump facts and logic, like paying bills. If he is malicious and insists on you paying for at least some bills, chose the cheapest ones, like the cell phone, water, internet, phone, etc. Always pay them late so your wallet might take them back so they are paid on time. If he tries the evil ploy of having you give him the money for the bills so they can be paid on time, tell him no, that you don’t trust him and either you will pay the bills your way or he can pay for them himself. The object is to get him to take the bills back, freeing up more of your money to spend. If he is conscious of credit reports, he will more than likely start paying the bills out of his funds just to make sure they get paid on time. As a word of caution, be careful in paying the cell phone bill late as that might effect getting upgrades later, or even getting it turned off which will be mortifying socially, even by telling them your stupid wallet didn’t pay the bill on time. You will lose ground on gossip, the last Facebook updates, or miss the text from that hottie you are interested in banging. That might be one bill you pay on time to ensure there is no interruption to your social life. The benefit of this scenario is that you have your own stream of money that you can spend any way you want without having to answer any tacky questions like “where did it all go?” If it does get asked, response should be along the lines, “My pay to do whatever I please and I don’t have to justify it to you.

Rule 19b: If you have landed a wallet and are currently working, consider dropping out of the workforce to be a stay at home wife. You can always tell your wallet it is in preparation of the children coming. Granted, you lose your income stream, but you hated that job anyway and would far prefer watching TV, going shopping, and hanging out with friends to doing boring work that is not fulfilling. It also gives you opportunities to bring bad boy thugs back to your house to fill all your holes in the marital bed (and in complete privacy) with no one the wiser, especially your wallet. Badger your wallet to make more so you have more to spend. If he baulks, tell him how much work you do around the house, and how you are stuck there, and that actually you do $250K worth of work each year as calculated by some studies. He should be thankful you are home taking care of all these things. If he’s an asshole and points out how you do very few of these things, and the ones you do do are done poorly, utilize Rule 10 and tell him that he makes you feel bad about yourself and start crying and bringing up a bunch of stuff that has nothing to do with the conversation. Bonus if you can turn the conversation into his shortcomings so he will eventually cave as he doesn’t want to deal with it. Downside to this scenario is some men want to track where every dollar goes and might be so crass as to ask what we’re spending money on. Best response is to put them off by saying generalities like “I bought stuff for the house, etc.” The one dreaded outcome in this scenario is the wallet restricting the flow of funds which necessitates elevation to full BITCHCON1. Either the wallet folds and you get what you want or he is done with you, in which case you can kick him out of the house, prevent him from seeing his kids, and get all your cash and prizes. As a bonus, you can openly show off your alpha and publicly let him to come to your house to bang the shit out of you.

Rule 20: Maybe the thugs you are bringing into your marital bed, or possibly banging in their run down, shitty apartment on the bad side of town, will father your children and give them the attributes that turn you on. But the thug isn’t father material so make sure he doesn’t know that he’s the father, as he might be tacky enough to want to be involved in the child’s life. He doesn’t understand that he was just for fucking and would make a terrible father. On the other hand, your wallet never finds out he isn’t the father of the children as he is just for raising and paying for them, not for fucking. You might fuck him once you are sure you’re pregnant and hoping to cover up the fact the kid isn’t his. This makes it so you get the children you want from the man you want and then get the wallet you want to pay for it all. Major cupcake coup.

Rule 21: When all else fails, use shaming language. If a man or wallet you have your eye on doesn’t want to get with you, make sure you tell him that it is because he’s gay, has a small penis, lives in his mom’s basement, just a child and hasn’t grown up, refusing to grow up to accept adult responsibilities etc. Tell them they need to “man up” and marry you, not to be afraid of a strong, independent empowered woman who is a NAWALT.

Rule 21a: Most wallets have started to become cunning and won’t let shaming language affect them. For those, you get society, the news, movies, and the public sphere feeding the same tropes in hope they will actually feel ashamed and start “manning up” by allowing women to attach to their wallets. Some will continue their avoidance and will have to be hunted down individually and eliminated before they spread any bad ideas about cupcakes out there.

Rule 21b: Shaming a man, primarily an alpha thug, but anyone that gets our motor running and gina tingling usually doesn’t work. They will either laugh in our faces and move on to the next cupcake which is hurtful and makes you want them even more, that you try to convince them that you can do everything they want and make them happy, they just need to put a ring on it. Do the convincing with a lot of sex and non-conventional sex. Even if it doesn’t work, you got a lot of hot sex out of it. The other possibility is the alpha thug will get annoyed with your nagging, slap you around, and fuck you hard seven ways to Sunday and then laugh at you afterwards. You will be a quivering bowl of jello in his awesome presence. If you can’t get him to marry you, find a wallet for your financial needs and continue fucking him with abandon any-time you get the opportunity, possibly utilizing Rule 20.