Arya’s Most Undervalued Skill

Settle down folks, cause we’re here today to talk about Arya Stark’s most undervalued skill. Cause yeah, she’s a warrior and has a sharp mind and a sharp tongue and she stands up for injustice. All very good things. But one trait that we rarely discuss (partially because it’s depicted more in the books than the show and partially because this is an undervalued skill in general) is this: My girl is scary good at making friends.

Like, shit man, Arya is just good at making all kinds of people like her. And I really do mean ALL kinds. There are lots of examples of this in the book, but for those who say that D&D deleted this aspect of her character in the show: Oh, contrair. Let’s look at the colorful cast of characters that Arya somehow manages to befriend (This is show focused but feel free to add book characters)

First up, we got Micah. Precious Micah. Gone before your time. But he’s an odd friend for a noble girl to have because he’s the son of a butcher in a town where they’re just stopping by for like…a day. Arya apparently scurries off and immediately befriends this total stranger and gets him to help her practice with a sword. And even though they only know each other for a day, his murder is enough to get the Hound on her kill list! Because she geuinely cares about and values this boy even though it would have been so easy for her to dismiss her.

Then we’ve got Syrio. I mean yes, Syrio was hired by her father but the guy does go out of his way to comfort her AND let us not forget, he is willing to sacrifice his life to help her. That’s not something you do for a girl that you don’t really like.

Arya befriends Gendry, Hotpie and Lommy as well. Even though Hotpie and Lommy start off my picking on Arya by season two, they’re having casual conversations and by the end of their journey, Hotpie bakes her a wolf bread! And welcomes her back in season 7! Also, Arya puts Polliver on her list partially because of killing Lommy. Clearly she usually only holds grudges when necessary or she wouldn’t have been so bent on seeking justice for this boy. And with Gendry, well, I don’t need to say much about that. Everyone else has said plenty about them. But suffice it to say that a poor bastard black smith is a strange friend for a high born girl to have.

She befriends Jaqen H’ghar because she helps him out of a jam, even though she could have left him to die, and because of it, she earns his help and a coin that gets her to Bravos. You think he offers that internship to everyone? No chance.

She befriends the Brotherhood, even though they kidnap and plan to randsom her, getting the archer to teach her how to shoot and even having a heartfelt conversation with Berric Dondarian, another man who makes it on her list.

She befriends the Hound, one of the first ever names on her list, and he tells her about his burning trauma and helps her away from the Red Wedding. Sure, we could say he’s trying to ransom her, but he clearly likes the girl even when she’s THREATENING him MULTIPLE TIMES.

She befriends many people in Bravos just by wandering the docks and learning about them. She befriends Lady Crane to the point that woman takes her in and heals her even though they’ve only had one short interaction. And if you think that there was no ‘Arya the friend making genius’ in season 7? Wrong! How about that conversation with the random Lannister soldiers? Makes friends with them too and has a good laugh.

But honestly, I think the greatest testement to Arya’s way with people is a show only addition to season two when she becomes cup bearer to Tywin fucking Lannister. Like, Jesus, my girl Arya somehow gets him to tell her about his daddy issues? Also he compares her to his daughter and talks about history with her? Its the warmest we ever see Tywin except maybe his scene with Tommen after Joffrey’s death. And even then, Tywin is partially trying to manipulate Tommen into listening to him. With Arya, he doesn’t need her for anything. He thinks she’s some random girl. They still end up having MULTIPLE positive interactions.

So Arya befriends just about everyone she meets and those people, from Micah to Tywin Lannister, seem to like her. Why is that?

1) She doesn’t care about background. Arya treats most people based on their deeds NOT where they come from. If you earn a spot on her list, its cause you fucked up real bad. But she even is willing to chat with people from her list if she needs to.

2) She’s a good listener. People are just…drawn to tell her shit. And she doesn’t use it as ammo or gossip later. She just kinda has that vibe that you could tell her anything and it won’t get back to your enemies.

3) She is strong willed but kind. Despite the terrible treatment she got in season seven by the writers, Arya is not cruel without purpose. She says what is on her mind and she calls people out but she also often gives people the benefit of the doubt.

4) She really genuinely cares about people. Like, she is ride or die if she’s known you for even a brief time and you seem like a good person. And she’ll kill for you! A proper friend.

5) I dunno, some mystical powers that caused Tywin Lannister to be sort of nice for 2.5 seconds.

Her skill at this is there in the show. It’s just underutilized and not often talked about. But Arya’s people skills is part of her character that makes her so loveable! And I think we should acknowledge it more.