So Time magazine has named Ben Bernanke Person of the Year. Be afraid, be very afraid.

The magazine cover curse is a well-known phenomenon: you should always short the stock of a company whose CEO is the subject of a glowing cover story in a major magazine.

Plus there’s the specific Time effect. Let’s not forget the 1985 joint portrait of Madonna and Cyndi Lauper, which concluded that Ms. Lauper was the one who’d remain a star.

And above all, let’s not forget this: