Truth is, I nearly gave up on the whole damn thing. Because of some bad programming I received as a kid, and despite the incredible jobs that I had been a part of, I still felt like a failure. That I had not, and would not, accomplish what I always thought I could or would or should. And then, perhaps in my darkest dark, I was able to save my own life thru the love and support and my friends and family, and the help of incredible professionals who took my hand and gently walked me back to understanding and loving myself, perhaps for the first time in my entire life. There is not a doubt in my mind that I was only standing on that red carpet last night BECAUSE I first learned to love myself while standing OFF of it.