I live in Kentucky, so I probably shouldn't say this, but horses aren't that great. They have one giant toenail on the end of each leg that never stops growing and they really like mints for some reason. That's insane. Possums are better. They look like alien rat cats and they can hang upside down from their tails. For these reasons, I believe that instead of breeding horses to be bigger we should be working towards a society wherein human jockeys are bred to be SMALLER in order to ride possums, the superior beast, for our amusement. Here are some scientific renderings I've created to help you imagine such a future. And please don't forget to ask your local politicians where they stand on this important issue.





Gettin' after it.





Rockin' and rollin'.





A wee jaunt on an ornery old fence steed.





Champions are made, not born.





That's MISTER possum jockey to you, fuckstick.



