Man’s Not Hot – he’s only taken off his jacket because his mum told him. Why? Because Big Shaq, man of the moment, is here to deliver his adoring public an alternative Queen’s Speech, especially for NME.

Who better to sum up the year that was 2017? Hard to believe it was only in August that the rapper (aka comedian Michael Dapaah) delivered his infamous freestyle on Charlie Sloth’s ‘Fire in the Booth’ YouTube show. One viral hit later, and he released an official version of ‘Man’s Not Hot’, which has been streamed more than 74 million streams on Spotify, while more than 100 million people have watched the (very glamorous) video.

A truly modern superstar, then. So we cut to Buckingham Palace, where Big Shaq – looking festive as fuck in his highly excellent ‘Man’s Not Hot’ Christmas jumper – has blagged his way beside the Christmas tree and has some words of wisdom on the high and lows of the past 12 months. Nothing but respect for my Monarch.


He shouts out Harry and Meghan, Cheryl and Harry (?), while Donald Trump receives a deadpan look of disapproval that would make his hair stand on end. Merry Christmas, one and all. Have a piping hot 2018.