“Of course it was a different Donald Trump — it’s a different Donald Trump every night, which means it’s always the same Donald Trump. He never fundamentally changes who he is as a person, he just swings wildly back and forth from one extreme to the other. He’s like a werewolf, but for the sun instead of the moon.” — SETH MEYERS

“And if he’s taking it seriously, then we should be really scared. ’Cause I mean this guy takes nothing seriously. This is the same dude who stared at an eclipse like it was a Magic Eye painting.” — TREVOR NOAH

“President Trump was warned about coronavirus by his advisers as early as Jan. 18 — and he dismissed it for months. So as much as Trump wants to blame China for downplaying the virus, he himself ignored all the messages that his experts were giving him. And he didn’t ignore them once, he didn’t ignore them twice, he ignored them countless times. Like if we were back in Bible times, Trump would have heard the burning bush and then just thrown water on it. [imitating Trump] ‘Ah, finally! That bush was so annoying.’” — TREVOR NOAH

“And of course, it went unheeded. Trump doesn’t heed. He doesn’t heed the law, he doesn’t heed advice, and he especially doesn’t heed studies.” — SETH MEYERS