From Mountain Dew to Kraft Cheese, I’ve done ’em all.

In 2008, I entered a Nine Inch Nails (NIN) film festival contest with the pretext that a team including Reznor was going to choose a select number of videos to be aired on their Youtube channel. That never happened. They fooled thousands of creatives to promote their product and never followed through with their promise. Happens all the time. Commercial contests are crap.

Originally these contests were opportunities to flex my creative muscles. It wasn’t about winning but just getting some exercise. But over the years I’ve become rather resentful of theses contests. The idea of selling out is already a bit distasteful, so the thought of selling out…for no money at all…makes me want to throw up.

To be fair, if someone really is a true fan of Doritos, they’re not selling out. But the idea that people could consider themselves a passionate fan of a bag of chips is even more disgusting to me. I tried to express my disgust in my final commercial contest entry ever. Enjoy.

For the record I don’t think there’s anything inherently bad about artificially orange corn triangles (although some nutritionists may disagree). I just think it’s kinda pathetic to expend our creativity to promote Doritos as fun, sexy, or cool. Because they’re not. They’re frikin corn chips yall. Enough is enough.