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Hard aspects between natal Mars/Neptune and Venus/Neptune are typically associated with romantic deceivers, escapists or victims. But these aspects can, if handled properly, also indicate a lover that many people would be blessed to hook up with. Read on to discover why Neptune’s illusions are not always a bad thing. Note that these descriptions apply to natal Mars and Venus in a man or woman’s chart, but I’ve used gender-specific pronouns to avoid confusion.

Venus/Neptune: Love and Forgiveness

Natal Venus in hard aspect to Neptune creates the dream of an ideal love. This doesn’t sound so bad until that dream drains the life from any real relationships the Venus/Neptune person has. Scenarios include putting her new partner on a pedestal, but losing interest when she realizes that her partner does not match her exalted fantasies. Or, sacrificing everything for wounded lovers who “need” to be saved. Deception (of the partner and of the self) arises because Neptune creates an awareness of what could be, while blurring the boundaries between reality and that other, transcendent state.

However, Venus/Neptune can also be a dream partner herself, in the best possible way. She still views love through rose-colored glasses, but this bolsters her relationship, rather than undermining it. This is the lover who gives you a second chance if you make a mistake. If you’re in a long-term relationship with Venus/Neptune, and your physical appearance changes over time (because of that thing called aging) she won’t be phased by this. She has a vision of who she fell in love with, and this is who she continues to see. If you’re going through a rough time and take it out on Venus/Neptune, she’ll let it slide, rather than take it personally. Basically, she’ll cut you some slack.

The healthy Venus/Neptune partner has boundaries, and won’t allow herself to be a victim (although she may have learned this lesson the hard way). She chooses compassion, forgiveness and focusing on positive outcomes. She doesn’t want to focus on the extra ten pounds you’ve gained, or your bitchy behavior, or your lapse in judgement. Unlike her Shadow Venus/Neptune counterparts, who are still hoping for the fantasy lover, healthy Venus/Neptune understands that no one is perfect. Neptune’s energy of universal love allows her to see beyond the challenging moments to a better future. She knows that it’s essential to forgive and move on.

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Related: Mars, Neptune and Orgasm Addiction: Holding and Sharing Your Sexual Energies

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