It may not always be easy to get Nick Diaz to show up for media responsibilities, but once you get him started, it’s even harder to make him stop.

UFC welterweight champion Georges St-Pierre found that out the hard way on today’s UFC 158 media call. While the champ struggled to get more than a few words in at a time, the challenger bombarded him with a bizarre mix of expletives, compliments, accusations and implications.

Diaz somehow managed to criticize GSP for being “pampered” in one breath while praising his financial success in the next. He blasted St-Pierre for having a team of managers and handlers “living his life for him” then admitted that his own life is “a mess.” He complained that he was not known or respected enough, and yet was too recognizable to be left alone. He seemed to take personal offense to the notion that his opponent in next Saturday night’s prize fight might want to physically hurt him, then told the champ he was “out of line” before describing himself as a “superhero” crusading for the “anti-bulls—” of MMA.

Somewhere in there, St-Pierre attempted to explain to Diaz the concept of “passive income” and the importance of building a personal brand. It didn’t go over so well.

“That sounds nice, Georges,” Diaz said, interrupting the champ’s description of his own path to financial security. “If I wear some tight shorts out there and got a f—ing haircut and I had someone buttering me up halfway through, telling me this bulls—, maybe it would have worked out. But I doubt it. You don’t even know where I come from. … You should see this s— over here. Nobody wants to come out here.”

Who could blame them, after listening to Diaz’s take on his surroundings in the Stockton, Calif. area? Why, just recently Diaz (26-8 MMA, 7-5 UFC) was sitting at a stoplight when a “soccer mom” stuck her head out the window and told him she hoped GSP (23-2 MMA, 18-2 UFC) beats him down on March 16 in Montreal’s Bell Centre, Diaz said.

“I’m living in a f—ing small town full of people that hate me right now,” the upcoming pay-per-view headliner concluded.

He sounded like his feelings were genuinely hurt by this, too. But then, with Diaz there hardly seems to be anything that isn’t genuine. Even with the stuff he says that directly contradicts the other stuff he says, somehow he really seems to mean it all.

This is why it’s such a shame that Diaz has been notoriously media shy for so much of his career (though of course he also manages to get upset about not getting enough media attention). Whenever we get the chance to hear him pour his thoughts out in one of his stream-of-consciousness rants, it’s fascinating. Even when you aren’t sure what he’s talking about, you can’t stop listening.

Unless you’re St-Pierre, I suppose. Then you could be forgiven for wishing he’d just shut up. For instance, look at the exchange where Diaz accused St-Pierre of having other people run his life, then broke in before St-Pierre could answer a reporter’s question about whether he felt “pampered.”

“I hope so, motherf—–,” Diaz shouted. “If I had that much money I’d be pampering myself the f— up. I’d be having motherf—–s pampering my s— left and f—ing right.”

St-Pierre didn’t seem to care for that. “Let me tell you something, uneducated fool,” he began with uncharacteristic fervor. “Listen to me…”

Unfortunately, we didn’t get much of a chance. Diaz was soon off on another tangent, insisting that he didn’t have anything against GSP, that he thinks he does a “great job,” but doesn’t understand why the champ would say that he deserved a beating.

“I deserve to get beat down?” Diaz said. “That’s what you said, right? Who the f— are you? Honestly, straight-up, I don’t think that you deserve to get beat down. I don’t think that. I don’t want anybody to get beat down.”

You could forgive GSP for feeling confused here. Is this a trick of some sort? A mind game Diaz is playing, oscillating between angry and conciliatory, all to keep him guessing? That might be how an analytical thinker like St-Pierre interprets it. To him, every action and every statement must have a reason. It’s all one giant game of chess. So what set of rules is this guy playing by?

“Have you listened to yourself, Nick?” St-Pierre asked at one point, as if he really wanted to know.

The thing is, Diaz has. It just doesn’t always seem like he’s hearing the same things other people are.

“Fine, for the fans, right, I’m this crazy motherf—er,” Diaz said. “But you know what? You know where I’m coming from, bro. You’re not stupid. You understand every f—ing word I’m saying right now. You’re over here trying to talk s—. Why don’t you just drop it? Why don’t you just say, ‘Look, we’re going to go out, and we’re going to have a fight?’ I’m not a disrespectful human being. I don’t deserve to be beat down. You think you’re going to win for whatever f—ing reason, and that’s that. Don’t get me wrong; you have good reason to think that. You’re No. 1. You’re the best, right? That should be enough right there.”

And it should, shouldn’t it? Does Diaz really think so? Does he think St-Pierre is right to think so?

It’s impossible to tell. St-Pierre might have touted the dark places in his own mind in those endless ads for UFC 158, but when you try to crawl inside Diaz’s head, you have to play by his rules. Just figuring out what they are could you take a lifetime.

For more on UFC 158, stay tuned to the UFC Rumors section of the site.

(Pictured: Nick Diaz)