Satire



Putin Prepares For Invasion of Europe With Massive Cuts to Military Spending

Russia announces "deepest defense budget cuts since 1990s". Putin must be stopped before it's too late

By Riley Waggama

March 19, 2017 " Information Clearing House " - Since the fall of the Berlin Wall, the world has enjoyed an unprecedented era of peace and prosperity.

Long gone are the days of wasteful military expenditures and no-bid contracts to build airplanes and aircraft carriers that neither fly nor float.

The permanent wartime economy that was never dismantled after World War II is ancient history. There is simply no longer any justification for spending many gazillions of dollars each year on Raytheon space lasers. In the United States, jet fighter factories now manufacture lawn mowers and Segways.

We are living in good times. Sensible times.

But all that we've accomplished over the last 25-odd years is now being threatened by one man.

From Baltimore to Baghdad, people cry out: "who will stop Vladimir Putin from conquering the world?"

Yes, Russia's czar has imperial ambitions — global ambitions. He wants war. He needs war.

And from the looks of it, that's exactly what he's preparing for :

Figures released by the Russian Federal Treasury have confirmed that Russia's defence budget has been cut by 25.5% for 2017, falling from RUB3.8 trillion (USD65.4 billion) to RUB2.8 trillion. The reduction represents the largest cut to military expenditure in the country since the early 1990s.

As we type these words, the Russians are greasing their tank treads with the blood of Al Nusra and other moderate, LGBTQ-friendly knitting clubs in Syria.

The rape of Aleppo did not fulfill Putin's bloodlust. He's coming for Europe. And then the world.