I voted Brexit because those dangerous EU roads cost me a coach-load of stolen gold, insists Michael Caine

Michael Caine has today revealed that the driving factor behind his vote for Brexit was a road accident in 1969 that left his coachload of stolen gold hanging precariously over the edge of a cliff in Italy.

“My vote for Brexit wasn’t about immigration,” he told reporters.

“It was a protest vote about those bloody stupid twisty roads in Italy. How the hell is anyone supposed to get a load of stolen gold bullion from Italy into Switzerland if they can’t put decent straight roads between the countries?

“And they drive on the wrong side of the road over there, which doesn’t help either.”

Michael Caine and his fellow thieves had stolen the gold from a bank in Turin and were attempting to drive to the safety of Switzerland when the accident happened. They were able to safely get out of the coach and elude the Italian police, but their stolen goods were lost over the side of the cliff.

“I put a lot of time and effort into nicking that gold,” he continued.

“And I know this sounds far-fetched, but you have to believe me – I was planning to give it all to the NHS when we got back to Blighty.”