25 years ago today (April 10), Rik Mayall and Ade Edmondson's Bottom began an era of carnage on the BBC.

In a modern world full of hipsters, selfie sticks and kale, it's sometimes good for the soul to embrace your inner slob and take a leaf out of Richie and Eddie's book.

To celebrate the milestone, we've put together a guide to becoming the ultimate slobby, disgusting and sad git.

1. Fast-track your way to getting a date

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Attempting to find a sexual partner can be an arduous process, with all that talking and listening bollocks. There are other means to find your soulmate.

Why not try out a revolutionary sex-spray to attract someone? Or even take out an ad in a lonely hearts column? "Minky Musky Sly Old Foxy Stoaty Stoaty Stoat" is a surefire winner.

You could always try a dating service or 'Love Bureau', but make sure to pretend to be the Duke of Kidderminster.

2. Don't bother paying for your own gas

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If rent is too high and payday is ages away, why pay for your own heating and hot water when there's a perfectly good supply next door?

Simply stick a dodgy looking pipe through their window and no-one will ever know! Just make sure you serve a cup of cold tea to the gas man if he ever shows up and don't panic.

Note: We're absolutely, categorically, positively not suggesting you actually do this, of course.

3. Pass the time with cheap games

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Boredom can be a problem, especially if your TV explodes. However, there is a solution if you use your imagination and bits of old tat around the house.

There's Pin the Tail on the Donkey, or if you don't have a pin, a tail or a donkey, why not play Put a Bit of Sellotape on the Fridge?

Chess is the game of kings, and if you don't have a set, just make one out of Spider-Man figurines, ketchup bottles and a potato. There's also Sardines or even Hide and Seek if you think you can beat the five-hour world record.

4. Buy several pairs of pants and tights

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You never know when a cattle prod is going to backfire and you end up spoiling your Halloween tights and fouling yourself.

If you're not leaving the house - which, let's face it, you probably won't if you want to be a slob - you really don't need to worry about your appearance or how disgusting and smelly the place is.

This is quite handy if you want to try out your culinary skills by creating the worst sprouts known to man, causing your farts to catch fire.

5. Losing weight is overrated

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[Weight loss tips from 10 minutes 20 seconds in]

Exercise and dieting can be a right arse of a chore. It's only really worth trying to lose weight if you're about to head off on holiday to Weston-Super-Mare or Bridlington.

So if you really have to beat the belly, your best bet is to build some sort of fridge-weight-pulley system in which you win a nudey photo of Des Lynam for your troubles.

There's also liposuction if you have a decent enough vacuum cleaner and a reliable mate, but that's probably not advisable.

6. Mindless violence solves everything

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To be the ultimate sad git watching Miss World and The Furry Honey-Pot Adventure all day, you should probably take out your frustrations on your equally hapless flatmate.

Anything goes: frying pans, umbrellas, crowbars, fridges, cattle prods and darts can get the job done. You can even film it and send it in to You've Been Framed for the chance of winning £250.

Again: For the record, we're not actually encouraging violence, especially in the cattle prod variety, so please don't take us too seriously!

Watch a bonus classic Bottom scene below:

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