If there haven’t been as many posts on this site as people might expect at a time of such incredible political turmoil, it’s because Wings isn’t at heart a commentary blog. We don’t do a lot of flat-out opinion pieces, tending to concern ourselves more with measurable, empirical facts, and since nobody knows anything about anything at the moment, we haven’t had all that much useful to say.

But the closest thing there is right now to a certainty is that sometime quite soon, Unionist politicians in Scotland are going to have to grow up and deal with this:

And their problem is that there’s no possible way to.

Every party in the Scottish Parliament backed a Remain vote, and every council area in Scotland voted that way. (The fact that the 38% of Scots who voted Leave are essentially unrepresented in the Parliament in that regard is a genuine problem about which little can be done.) Neither Kezia Dugdale nor Ruth Davidson nor Willie Rennie wants Scotland to find itself outside the EU.

Unfortuately for them, if it stays in the UK then it’s going to.

The harsh truth that there is no way Westminster will ever allow Scotland to remain in the EU while the rest of the UK leaves is one that Unionists are still massively in denial about.

Dugdale can say “But I don’t want to choose!” as much as she likes. Ruth Davidson can tell the Guardian “I expect early engagement with the incoming prime minister on that subject as we look to maintain Scotland’s EU status, in line with the democratic wishes of the people of Scotland” until she’s even bluer in the face than usual.

The Lib Dems can “pledge to keep Britain in the EU after next election” if they want, ignoring everyone’s laughter, and Owen Smith can indulge his mad twin delusions of (a) becoming Labour leader and (b) Labour winning an election and holding a second EU referendum in 2020, but it’ll be far too late by then.

It’s not just MPs who’ve misplaced their marbles. A cross-party group of doddering old Lords have given themselves the grand title of the Constitutional Reform Group and proposed a whole new Act Of Union in an attempt to square the circle.

But their draft bill, published yesterday, is an act of drivelling madness. It proposes a “federal” UK with four separate national Parliaments in addition to a reduced central Westminster controlling a set of shared powers. But among the powers it plans to reserve are, um, membership of the EU, foreign relations and immigration.

…in other words, all of the things Scotland wants to take control of in order to stop itself being dragged out of the EU against its will in the first place.

The CRG’s draft bill is so jaw-droppingly clueless and detached from reality in terms of its supposed aims that the only way it could have been any stupider would have been if it had also proposed to actually remove powers, for example by taking back control of income tax from Holyrood to London. Which, er, it does, on page 26.

But wait! All is well! The new Prime Minister is on her way to Scotland, in her first full day of work since forming her Cabinet, to assuage everyone’s fears, soothe feelings and bond us all together more strongly than ever before!

But her “offer” is clear: shut up and eat your cereal.

Because the new Chancellor had already explained what that meant:

Unionists in Scotland are flapping in a panic, stalling for time in the desperate hope that some unknown miracle will save them from a day of reckoning that now cannot be avoided.

Perhaps there’ll somehow be a Brexit deal that retains access to the single market while not accepting freedom of movement. Perhaps the UK can delay invoking Article 50 for so long that the Scottish electorate will finally notice that the SNP are BAD, and that Jackie Baillie or Adam Tomkins are the future of governance. Perhaps a massive UKIP surge will shift Scottish opinion in favour of Brexit.

(It’s undoubtedly the case that a non-trivial number of 2014 Yes voters oppose EU membership. But the simple arithmetic suggests that they’re outnumbered by No voters who want to stay – the margin of No’s victory in the indyref was less than half the size of Remain’s. And our gut feeling is that most Yes voters care more about independence than being in the EU if push comes to shove.)

Or, more likely than any of those, perhaps an asteroid will crash out of the sky and end all human life before Dugdale, Davidson and whatsisname have to face up to a decision that so far they’ve shown no sign of having the emotional maturity to handle.

Because the cold, hard, inescapable truth is that Scotland is going to have to choose a Union, and pretty soon at that. The opposition leaders and media can stamp their feet and hurl toys out of their prams, but Scotland’s third constitutional referendum of the 21st Century is coming, and everyone’s going to have to pick a side.