This year, Democrats in Michigan — which Trump won — are running women for every statewide office: governor, senator, attorney general and secretary of state. A poll last month shows that Michigan women favor Democrats by over 20 percentage points. Campaigning for the Democratic nomination for attorney general, Dana Nessel ran an ad asking, “Who can you trust most not to show you their penis in a professional setting?”

Whitmer doesn’t lean in to gender to quite this degree. But she first came to national prominence in 2013 when, as the State Senate minority leader, she gave a wrenching speech imploring her colleagues to reject a bill that would force women to buy special insurance riders if they wanted coverage for abortion, even in cases of rape and incest, things no one plans for. Setting aside her prepared remarks, she revealed that she’d been raped in college. “It’s something I’ve hidden for a long time, but I think you need to see the face of the women that you are impacting by this vote today,” she said.

Baring her soul didn’t work; the bill passed. In this, she prefigured Christine Blasey Ford, who blew up her life to testify that Kavanaugh sexually assaulted her in high school, only to see him confirmed anyway. Whitmer described how “depressing and demoralizing” it was to watch Blasey come forward and subject herself to the world’s hostile scrutiny, “and then it not making a difference.”

But the demoralization didn’t last. On the Sunday after Kavanaugh was confirmed, Whitmer held a packed rally with New York Senator Kirsten Gillibrand in Birmingham, Mich. “It felt just like I was back at the Women’s March,” she said. The previous day had been terrible for a lot of women, “but they were showing up, and seeing one another, and saying we’ve got work to do.”

I showed Whitmer my friend’s text and asked her if she was really confident that Democrats would make the midterms a turning point. “I am,” she said. “I see it every day. I talk to people every day.”

Now, part of the job of a good politician is projecting optimism. But again and again over the horrible months of Trump’s reign, I’ve found that spending time with the women who are working their hearts out against him is at least a temporary cure for despair. So if you, too, are scared, or furious, or despondent, find a Democrat close to you and go canvass for her (or him). “It’s the best way to feel good about the world and connect with people,” Whitmer said.