Trevor Noah

It’s an oft-said sentence in 2019, but yesterday was a historic day in Washington as House Democrats announced formal articles of impeachment against Donald Trump, making him only the fourth president in history to face impeachment. “I know this sounds weird, but I’m actually proud of Donald Trump,” said Trevor Noah on the Daily Show. “He’s getting impeached, but I didn’t think he would make it three years.

“Trump getting this far into his presidency without being impeached is a lot like when a dog accidentally drives a car into a tree,” Noah explained. “Yeah, the dog crashed, but he made it like eight blocks, that’s impressive. I don’t even know how he put it into drive, he barely knows letters.”

The Daily Show (@TheDailyShow) Let’s be honest: Trump getting this far into his presidency before getting impeached is pretty impressive. pic.twitter.com/0bhlmplveg

House Democrats introduced just two articles of impeachment against Trump: one for abuse of power in pressuring Ukraine to investigate Joe Biden by withholding federal aid, and one for obstruction of Congress by preventing any aides from participating in the impeachment inquiry.

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The Democrats did not introduce any articles based on Robert Mueller’s report, which “means the Democrats are showing a lot of restraint, because let’s be honest, Trump has done enough crazy shit to merit 2,000 articles of impeachment”, Noah said. “There was obstruction of justice from the Mueller report, using the presidency to enrich his businesses, the porn star payoffs, flag molestation, the time he looked directly into an eclipse and, of course, having Don Jr – I mean, that’s impeachment on it’s own.

“The good news for Trump is that he’s only facing two charges. Although in a way, that’s also kinda sad for him,” Noah continued, since Nixon had three articles brought against him (he resigned before they were passed), Bill Clinton had four, and Andrew Johnson had 11, “which means Trump will have the smallest impeachment of all time. You know that’s going to make him insecure – he’s gonna be like, ‘It’s not about the size of the impeachment, it’s about the friction of the conviction.’”

Stephen Colbert

On the Late Show, Stephen Colbert also addressed the two formal articles of impeachment. “It’s something that no one could’ve predicted …” he said, cracking a smile, “until Trump was elected.”

Colbert then turned to the words of Adam Schiff, chairman of the House intelligence committee, who pushed back on critics saying the Democrats should wait until the courts force Trump aides to testify. “The argument ‘why don’t you just wait’ amounts to this: why don’t you just let him cheat in one more election? Why not just let him cheat just one more time?” Schiff said.

“Fun fact: ‘why not let him cheat just one more time’ was what Trump had inscribed on Melania’s wedding gift,” Colbert added.

The House judiciary committee plans to vote on the articles on Thursday, the same day Schiff is scheduled to be Colbert’s guest. “That’s how America works: when people make American history they come on the Late Show to promote it,” Colbert riffed. “Hopefully he will bring a clip of the impeachment.”

Seth Meyers

On Late Night, Seth Meyers explained why he thought two articles of impeachment meant Trump “got off easy. Remember, the guy also obstructed justice in the Mueller probe, violated the constitution by enriching himself, inflicted human rights abuses on migrant children and directed an illegal scheme to pay hush money to cover up an affair,” Meyers said. “It’s not even hard to find the crimes with this guy. It’s like a Where’s Waldo? where Waldo is right in the middle of the map with a giant bag of cash in one hand and giving you the finger with the other one.”

Based on a series of clips of various Republican talking points, as well as Trump’s acting chief of staff, Mick Mulvaney, confirming a quid pro quo with Ukraine and telling White House reporters to “get over it”, Meyers concluded that “at this point, all Trump and his allies have left is one thing: lying about the investigations and claiming there’s some sort of treasonous, deep state witch-hunt to overthrow him”.

Republicans are now advancing the claim that impeachment is hurting the American people, Meyers said. He pointed to a recent Fox News interview in which a White House spokesman said that Congress is only providing “hatred, vitriol and a sham impeachment hearing that doesn’t do anything to put food on the tables of the American people”.

“Oh NOW you’re worried about putting food on people’s tables?” said an incredulous Meyers. “Last week you guys kicked 700,000 people off food stamps by imposing awful new work requirements. Think about how cruel that is: work requirements from a guy who never works.

“That’s the kind of cruelty Republicans have committed themselves to defending, and they’re fine with doing it,” Meyers concluded. “Today, Democrats at least put down a marker and said there will be consequences for Trump’s behavior.”

Jimmy Kimmel

And in Los Angeles, Jimmy Kimmel admitted that the latest impeachment development wasn’t all that surprising. “Who would’ve ever imagined that the guy who bragged about being able to walk in on contestants in his beauty pageant while they were changing clothes would abuse his power? It’s shocking, really,” he deadpanned.

If the House passes the articles, which seems all but certain given the Democratic majority, then impeachment will move to a trial held in the Senate and presided over by Chief Justice John Roberts. The Senate majority leader, Mitch McConnell, who would schedule the trial, “has not indicated when the trial will be held or how long the trial will last”, Kimmel reported, “but he did announce that the verdict will be not guilty”.