Secret Origin of the Plastic Catachans

The Secret Origin of the Plastic Catachans

(don't tell anyone! it's a secret!)

For many light years Dakkies have wondered just how and why GW's first (well second... OK third technically), and for a long time only, plastic guard models were these guys.





Well wonder no more...

(originally posted here - http://www.dakkadakka.com/dakkaforum/posts/list/120/380165.page#3530063 )

+++++++

Bigwig circa 1999 - Once long ago we made multipart IG kits with all their heavy and special weapons. And everyone loved them. So we stopped making them. This is because we hate our fans almost as much as we hate making money. And then we started making Imperial Guard only in metal, but omitting key weapons! Yet everyone still loved them because the sculpts were amazing. So now we shall stop making them. We shall now make plastics anew!

Sculptor - Yay! Y'know Jess Goodwin did this awesome sketch of a new IG and you'll note he's fully covered in armor and a gas mask which is good for IG because you have paint loads of them and cloth is easier to paint than skin.

Bigwig - I say thee Nay.

Sculptor - All right, all right, OK, that's fine, everyone loves the Cadians y'know

Bigwig - Aye and we shall do the Cadians.

Sculptor - Yay!

Bigwig - In five years.

Sculptor - Oh...

Bigwig - And they shall look nothing like that.

Sculptor - Oh... Uh right. OK, fine. Well the Mordians have a cool 19th century vibe

Bigwig - Nay.

Sculptor - Right, yeah, I always thought they were a bit too clean and neat for the grim darkness of the far future. Now the Tallarn are-

Bigwig - Nay.

Sculptor - Yeah, they're a bit too 'ethnic' I get you, some people are just gonna be turned off by an army of Arabs. But seeing as the Cold War is over let's go with the Valhallans! Hoards of greatcoated Russian -

Bigwig - Nay.

Sculptor - Yeah, OK, let's skip the whole historicals in space idea huh. How about we update the original plastics, the Necromundan Spiders and-

Bigwig - Nay.

Sculptor - Nay?

Bigwig - Nay.

Sculptor - They don't have many models but the Storm Troopers have this cool paratrooper meets sci-fi vibe that -

Bigwig - Nay.

Sculptor - Nay? But, but...

Bigwig - Nay.

Sculptor - But that only leaves one established regiment and they're-

Bigwig - Tell me, what do you know of the man known as Rambo? I recently saw a video cassette tape of this... Rambo and I feel the kids today will appreciate the chance to have a whole army of Rambo.

Sculptor - But, but lack of realism, lots of flesh to paint, no armor, not suitable for all environments, I mean some of them are just wearing t-shirts and...

Bigwig - Yes. Rambo. We shall make a whole army of Rambo.

Sculptor - (stunned silence)

Bigwig - Oh and do be sure to give them just one special weapon and no heavies my good man. We do not want those 'Umpire Guardian' players to feel we are too generous now do we?

Sculptor - (stunned silence)

Bigwig - I see you are amazed by my leadership. Excellent. Make it so my good man.

+++++++

And thus IG players only option was to field a whole army of Rambos....



