Me Like Bees | February 15, 2016

SYFFAL would like to formally and orally welcome Me Like Bees to the American heartland for their 2016 tour. Instead of asking them things we don't care about, we've decided to put together a running tour diary of their adventures trying to hide their bodily functions, fluids, and odors from each other for a few weeks! If you've never heard these shitstacks, scroll to the bottom (the power bottom) and hit play on the stream dreams!

WE GIVE YOU:

ME LIKE BEES TOUR DIARY DREAM JOURNAL!

Day One: 2/1/2016

"When playing our hometown crowd of Kansas City, they greet us warmly with plenty of Satan and whiskey. Kicking off our tour tonight at the Riot Room, we'll meet up with Never Shout Never and the rest of the boy wonders in Minneapolis tomorrow."

Tim

Day Two: 2/2/2016

"Miles and miles of solid white bullshit forever. Welcome to Minnesota."

"I'm going to be a vegetarian this tour" - Luke Sheafer

Day Three: 2/3/2016:

"Bathroom picture: An excessive amount of mirrors in the green room bathrooms at the Rave in Milwaukee because artists love to check themselves out while they're taking a shit. It's how Randy Travis wrote his last album."

"Motel picture: the amount of value was surprisingly incredible."

Day 4: 2/4/2016:

"It was technically our day off so I bought a game for my Gameboy that simulates what I should be doing every day."

Day 5: 2/5/2016:

"Just a barrage of A-cups being thrown on stage during Never Shout Never's set."

"I tried to take a picture of my drum kit but dude from Metro Station wouldn't put on a shirt."

Day 6: 2/6/2016:

"I've been sick today, the first person to be sick on tour. I awoke out my Nyquil induced coma in the van to discover we have arrived at St. Andrews hall in Detroit. This is the first man to talk to me upon arrival in this fine city. He asked me if I was "fittin to rock out" and if I was "gonna represent." I confirmed his suspicions and told him I would. To which he replied "good, because if you don't I'm gonna have to cut ya!" I then told him I would expect nothing less and that I came here to win.

Detroit rock city baby."

Day 7: 2/7/2016:

"We drove to Columbus, OH to spend our off day with NSN bassist Taylor Macfee for his birthday. We drank beer, ate cheap pizza and watched the Super Bowl. We left to go back to our hotel, they left to go to a strip club called "sirens" where the girls tonight are a "mix of both A and B team, with a full service bar featuring free pizza and wieners." I spent the rest of my night watching semi pro wrestling and ultimately changing the channel multiple times to avoid watching "Two and a Half Men"

Day 8: 2/8/2016:

"Picked up a one off show in Indianapolis at the HiFi. Cool little venue and town. Went to a Mexican food place where they serve "Super Donkeys" and J-Thrill ate more food than his little bird stomach could handle. Tomorrow we'll head back to Columbus and join the tour again. This time I won't let Metro Station steal my lunch money."

Day 9: 2/9/2016:

"Columbus Ohio loves hockey and beer. Fuck yes. Sign me up. The venue tonight sold pepperoni stuffed hot dogs wrapped in a slice of pizza with a self serve garlic dip. It is this understanding of freedom that consistently makes Ohio the most important swing state in the Union.

Luke fell on stage and I laughed harder than I should have. Overall it was our best show on tour.

Metro Station kicked someone out of the show for flipping them off on stage. I didn't know that was a possibility. I could have kicked like 3 assholes out of a show by now and would have felt awesomely drunk on power.

We spent the rest of the time in the basement and I flipped Nick off to establish my punk cred. I don't want him thinking I'm a sellout. Up the punks, oi oi oi. Nick kicked me out of the show, what a poser.

Tomorrow we flee to the Cleve where Drew Carey is still a celebrity."

Day 10: 2/10/2016:

"Tonight was the last night of touring with the bros in Never Shout Never and Metro Station. They've taught me so much, like how to travel in single digit weather without a shirt, what not to do when crossing the border into Canada, and why we have yet to invent Breast Milk Ice Cream.

After the show, The dudes in Metro Station and I started intimidating bitches with our muscles and sweet knowledge of US National Parks. Then Kyle from The Downtown Fiction put "the diamond cutter" on Nick, winning is the tag team heavyweight championship. What a poser. Degeneration X. Suck it.

Now we're snowed in somewhere in Ohio, where I'm forced to reference Hawthorne Heights only notable single. They're my favorite all female band. Cut my wrist and like my bees. Tomorrow we're going to attempt the 10+ hour drive to Columbia Missouri where Luke has to live his own personal hell pretending that he's a Mizzou fan. Go Tigers!"

Day 11: 2/11/2016:

"We entered reality again as we unloaded our gear into a small club in Columbia, MO. The crowd was a strange mix of Cowboys and Hippies, which is on par with the rest of the state of Missouri.

They served the finest of adult beverages in a can. Stag was my beer of choice, as it puts the "ass" in classy.

While we played on stage there were two girls hula hooping in the crowd. I never understood why that always happens in college towns. It's not an enjoyable experience for any of the parties involved.

The highlight of my night was that someone brought a puppy. Nick threatened to not play the show but rather play with the puppy instead. It was a reasonable request."

Day 13: 2/13/2016:

"We ended our journey at Kansas State University in Manhattan, KS. Last time I was on this campus was 11 years ago. I participated in a dorm boxing match and made out with a college freshman while watching Blade 2.

College shows are always kinda awkward just because there's no alcohol at campus events and college kids are at the age where they are convinced that they are "too cool to have fun while being sober." All in all though the kids were nice, the staff was great and it was actually better than I was expecting. I love the state of Kansas and its people, but not Governor Brownback. That dude's a dick.

In the spirit of learning, here is a compiled list of everything I've learned this tour. My opinions reflect my personal observations and do not necessarily reflect the views of the rest of the band, so don't pin that shit on them.

1. All sound guys have ponytails. Figuratively or literally. You know what I mean.

2. All sound guys love to talk about the band that they were in from the 90s and how much cocaine they did.

3. Be on time. All the bands get together and talk shit on the band that's late, get your shit together.

4. Don't underestimate Canadians when crossing the border. Speak clearly when spoken to and know what you're talking aboot.

5. You may think Jeezy's album is gonna drop on a certain day, but Raps most disappointing father figure will let you down. He'll probably change the name and album art work five more times.

6. People actually listen to Drake. I know. Crazy.

7. The dudes in Metro Station refuse to wear shirts. It's not even negotiable.

8. If Luke was a pokemon, he'd be Snorlax. When he falls asleep, it's almost forever and he's immovable. When he wakes up, he eats 900lbs of food then goes back to sleep.

10. To my knowledge, Luke remained a vegetarian all tour, leaving him with 30 remaining slim jims and a disappointed Macho Man Randy Savage.

11. Don't trust anyone who cannot identify a Wu Tang lyric.

12. While you may be excited about drinking Yuengling, east coasters are over it.

13. People in Wisconsin aren't particularly interested in talking about Netflix's "making a murderer" with you. See example 12.

14. Wifi does not exist, plan on buying extra data.

15. Paul McCartney died in 1969 look it up.

We're driving through the night as I write this. We're excited to get home, sleep in our own beds, shit in our own toilets, sleep in our own toilets and shit in our own beds. I'm personally excited to not hear Luke and our merch guy bitch about Trivia Crack questions. They told me to put in ear plugs. Freedom of speech I guess. I'll respect it. "

Tim // Me Like Bees