This week has already brought a lot of ups and downs for Donald Trump. On one hand, his favorite Dancing With the Stars competitor fared well on Monday, and tarnished some beloved cultural property in the process. On the other, however, he’s still facing impeachment and his decisions in the Middle East have sparked fury from all sides. As Jimmy Kimmel put it Monday night, “Make no mistake: The president is melting down like a creamsicle in July.”

Over the weekend the president fumed over the federal investigation of Rudy Giuliani, tweeting, “So now they are after the legendary ‘crime buster’ and greatest Mayor in the history of NYC, Rudy Giuliani. He may seem a little rough around the edges sometimes, but he is also a great guy and wonderful lawyer. Such a one sided Witch Hunt going on in USA. Deep State. Shameful!”

“Is there such a thing as a two-sided witch hunt?” Kimmel quipped. “Was there a group of witches that hunted down regular people?”

Still, it seems noteworthy that Trump is still sticking his neck out for Giuliani, considering that just days ago he seemed unsure as to whether or not he would even still call Giuliani his attorney. Kimmel seemed surprised by this development: “So Trump and Giuliani are still a team,” he marveled before offering a theory as to how this alliance has continued: “Whenever Donald Trump considers getting rid of Rudy, Rudy hypnotizes him with that giant pinky ring he wears.”

But Kimmel seemed most amazed by the president’s threats to sue Nancy Pelosi and Adam Schiff, whose impeachment efforts seem to be rattling Trump more than anything else. “Who’s he gonna get to sue them?” Kimmel said. “All his lawyers are either in jail or going there soon!” And as for the president’s decision to call Fox News and complain about the network’s purportedly unfair recent coverage of him?

“He really is the snowiest, flakiest snowflake there ever has been, isn’t he?” Kimmel said. “You could ski on Donald Trump.”

Trevor Noah, meanwhile, zeroed in on the president’s decisions in the Middle East. “In a normal administration, an impeachment inquiry would be enough drama on its own,” the Daily Show host said. “But the Trump presidency is like a Black Friday sale happening at the Fyre Festival: pure chaos.“

As Noah noted, Trump’s decision to pull troops out of northern Syria has already proved disastrous for the U.S.’s Kurdish allies in Turkey—and as a result, the president has been roundly criticized by pretty much everyone possible. “Republicans, Democrats, Fox News—even the Joker was like, Alright, I love chaos, but this shit is insane.”

In summary, Noah said, “Donald Trump is the only person who can find a way to make the Middle East more chaotic.”

Why Reporting on Trump is So Difficult

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