“Somehow… pirating has returned.” It was bound to happen, but we’re sad to report that Star Was: The Rise of Skywalker has been leaked in its entirety online. After a worldwide release that earned over a billion dollars, the film found its way online, where anyone and everyone with an internet connection can view it online — completely free. For now, at least.

Sources claim the unfortunate event has led Walt Disney Studios to crack down on thousands of viewers illegally streaming the film on a website called DisneyMinus.com.

The site, which bills itself as the flip side to Disney Plus “minus the unnecessary fees” was created by neckbeard Brock Leigh of Amselmo, Nebraska. Leigh has spent the last month working on his passion project, compiling Rise of Skywalker clips posted to Twitter. These tweets include footage from the trailer released by Lucasfilm’s official Twitter account as well as in-theater camera shots like the clip seen here:

If you did not cry in this scene you are a human being without humanity, without soul, without heart, only a speck of dust in space.#TheRiseOfSkywalker pic.twitter.com/uOjcJbv0Rv — Star Wars The Rise of Skywalker Archive (@sw_archive) January 21, 2020

“My friend Connor wanted to see the movie, so I told him I’d find it for him online.” Leigh says. “I could never find a version that didn’t have some weird subtitles in it or that shaky camera effect, so I decided to find other ways I could get the movie to him.”

Leigh told FakingStarWars that over the next month he spent his nights trolling Twitter for clips of the film. “My favorite clip is the one at the end when Ben and Rey get together,” Leigh guffawed. The clip referenced can be seen here:

Supreme Leader Ben Solo comes to collect his wife. pic.twitter.com/2RrRdlIXJ5 — Ben Solo IS Immortal. (@Raynebow_Rayne) January 20, 2020

Brock may suffer from mental instability, but when asked if he thought he was doing anything wrong he replied to FSW with this statement:

“My aunt has Disney Plus, and she shared her login with me, so I’m not doing anything wrong since my family gives Disney money every month!”

We’ve reached out to the film’s director for a comment on the matter, but have yet to hear from JJ Abrams. His publicist, however, told FakingStarWars “We’re ignoring it, hoping it’ll go away. It has parts of The JJ Cut and we plan on releasing that version in theatres this spring.”

Abrams and Disney seem less concerned with online streamers and more concerned with future profits for the company. Perhaps The JJ Cut will co-incide with the release of a new line of toys as well. Only time will tell.

UPDATE: Disney has reportedly sent a cease and desist order to Leigh who runs the website.

As always, stay tuned to FakingStarWars.net for all the finest Star Wars comedy, parody, and satire in the galaxy. Don’t forget to follow us on Twitter, Instagram and Facebook and subscribe to our podcast on iTunes or Google Play for even more unbelievable news from a galaxy far, far away. Also, consider supporting us on Patreon… for as little as a buck a month, you can help us fake harder, better, faster, stronger.

—Veg’an The Hutt