Remember the canned cheeseburgers? Now you can make yours even more yummylicious with canned 100% US bacon, cooked and ready to eat. Actually, forget the burger: make your own bacon sandwich using two additional layers of bacon instead of bread. Each can contains all the vitamins and minerals you need to keep a healthy life while pretending to work in front of the computer, and you can even use the remaining fat to polish iPhones and assorted gadgets.



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Each can comes with 40 to 50 slices of lipids and protein, produced using three pounds of raw bacon plus:

• water



• salt



• sugar



• smoke flavoring



• sodium phosphates



• sodium erythorbate



• sodium nitrite


That's all the stuff any human flesh-eating zombie needs. $110 will buy you a full package of 12 cans of tasty cholesterol, heart bypasses not included. [MREdepot—thanks Kalle]