By the worlds #1 dating coach for Introverted Men - Nick Neeson.

Will you be her emotional tampon or her lover?

Last week I had an interesting conversation with a good friend of mine.

She was complaining about a female colleague that treats men disrespectfully.

Here’s what she told me.

Her colleague is seeing this really nice guy from work.

He’s been having a difficult time, and my friend is his shoulder to cry on.

Last time he spoke to my friend, he told her:

“I really don’t know what to think about her. We’re dating, but we’re not. She’s hot and cold. Close and distant. She sends so many mixed signals. It’s so confusing."

My friend knows what’s really going on. She knows that her colleague is sometimes seeing another guy. Now, this other guy is less reliable and less nice.

In fact, he’s the typical “bad boy”. Still, when he makes time for her, she drops everything she’s doing and rushes over to see him.

So my friend confronted her about this.

She asked why she’s behaving so disrespectfully to the nice guy, and why she jumped through all kinds of hoops just to see that asshole.

Her colleague answered that she actually didn’t like the way the bad guy was treating her, but she accepts it because he has other things to offer her.

So my friend asked her why she doesn’t go for the bad guy completely. Why is she stringing the nice guy along?

Her answer:

“It’s not that I like him because he’s bad. It’s just that he’s exciting, and so confident and sexy. I guess that bad side is just what comes with the package. And the other one… Well, I can count on him. I know he will always be there for me, but it’s so predictable and boring.” I wish I could combine both of them into one man.”

The worst part of this story?

Even though my friend couldn’t stand her colleague’s behavior, she could somehow understand her.

Here’s what she said to me.

“Somehow, I understand her. He’s really good-looking, but even I wouldn’t want to date him. He’s just too nice.”

I can tell from personal experience with my clients that this happens to many men.

What can we learn from this? Are good men doomed? Should good men become bad guys if they want to get the keys to women’s hearts?

Hell no!

Here’s why.

In my 20+ years of helping introverted men get their love life handled, I’ve learned that women actually don’t like bad guys. They don’t like their bad side AT ALL!

They only like some of the qualities that bad guys have.

But they also like parts of the nice guy.

Sadly, when it comes to sexual chemistry, the bad boy almost always wins.

But there is yet another kind of man: a man who combines the good qualities of both the bad guy and the good guy, without the bad side of either of them.

We call him the Good Bad Boy.