Or when you openly express doubt of victims, when you declare the problems of a marginalized group to not be real problems, when you dismiss or belittle them, when you hand-wave and pretend like victims of discrimination or assault or harassment are exaggerating, when you behave as though you believe people’s problems are some kind of a mass hallucination because you’ve never experienced them personally… at least one woman (or any person, possibly) you know and love has silently decided she cannot trust you.