Recap: Saga accidentally agreed to take out Thor on a Pokemon Rangers mission. She caught a fish named Caerwyn only to teach him SURF and made it to the next town.

First things first, buh-bye Caerwyn and welcome back Xion!

Always gotta have my Potions.

One of the lovely NPCs in this town gives you an Instant Lapras, which is a replacement for SURF. Thank crap, I didn’t want to have to get that fish out again.

Rather than charge head-first into a battle with Team Asgard again, Saga heads East to grind her Pokemon on the wilds and trainers here.

I just met my favorite Poke-Ranger.

Foxxy nooooooo!

Foxxy nooooooo!

Woooooahhhh, what now?? Magmar evolves??? Since when??

Holy damn.

That’s one bulky dude.

Looks like he’s ready to go kick some ass.

So, after some grinding, here’s what Saga’s team looks like.

Voice: us rule the world!

I was actually still in the process of grinding. I had no intention of crossing that bridge yet, I was heading towards the other patches of grass. As soon as this text box popped up I panicked. A battle was about to start.

Oh crap. Oh geez. It’s Jake.

Jake’s Buddy: Maybe we can ask them where it is? I mean, it’s not like they’ll figure out our ultimate plan.

I reeeeaaally hope Jake isn’t trying to actually take over the world. A world full of swag would… just… be… awful.

Jake: I suppose you’re right… not my first choice, but seeing as we don’t have any other options… Yo! Saga! We’re looking for the TM87, Swagger! As if a nerd like you could ever find it, but we’ll ask anyways lol.

Did you just say L-O-L out loud?

As you know, Saga is a good, honest person. She actually found that TM earlier. She honestly answers that ‘yes’, she has seen it.

Jake: likes of you!

FUCK YOU, JAKE

Jake: If you really think you are the one destined to wield the TM87, fight me in a battle to prove it! Bring it! A battle of the swags!

If you had just been nice to me, I would have given it to you. I never use Swagger anyway, it’s too risky of a move for my taste.

Firstly: That is a keyring. I am fighting a keyring with some car keys on it. Did the Pokemon creators have an off-day or something?

Secondly: I CAN UNDERSTAND LOSING TO A FIGHTING-TYPE BUT GODDAMNIT FOXXY YOU JUST LOST TO A KEYRING. YOU LITERALLY PUNCHED YOURSELF IN THE FACE BECAUSE A KEYRING CONFUSED YOU.

Thirdly: Why did Jake need Swagger when he obviously already had a TM to teach to his Pokemon?

Fourthly: THE KEYRING POKEMON CONFUSED ME TOO, FOXXY, BUT YOU DON’T SEE ME PUNCHING MYSELF IN THE FACE DO YOU? Gaaaahhhh… I am this close to just boxing you. If I didn’t want a Leafeon so bad I would have already called it quits.

XION GOT CONFUSED TOO BUT HE DIDN’T BEAT HIMSELF UP ABOUT IT.

Having drowned the Klefki with his custom move, Xion continues the pattern with Jake’s next Pokemon.

Barret gets tagged in to take out Kingdra.

Then levels up to 45.

Xion swaps back in for Scraggy.

Xion has grown accustomed to winning battles while his HP is in the red. I love it.

Jake: going to find the TM87?

Jake’s Buddy: LOL JAKE YOU LOST!

Jake: Shut up! Saga must have cheated! I’ll deal with you later, Saga! But gz to you, I guess.

“Gz to you”? What does that mean? Good… zealous attitude?

Jake: You beat the swaggiest leader of Team Yoloswag! Now see you later… or hopefully not! YOLOSWAG OUT!

Whew. We made it. We FLY back to Ladoga Town to heal up and then travel back to the bridge.

FOXXY ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME

Eventually, the bridge starts producing only flying Pokemon. I ignore them. I’m not a huge fan of birds in real life, and I don’t care much for the birds in Pokemon… save the legendaries. You can’t not like the legendaries.

The next route is a cave.

You can’t see any Pokemon following me, but Zephyr is actually behind Saga right now. He doesn’t have a follower sprite yet, if you remember, so anytime you see Saga “alone”, remember that Zephyr is just being invisible.

We’ve already made it to the next town!

Hey, look who’s here! It’s Mr. Briney and his best pal Peeko!

This made me smile.

He gives us the HM for DIVE and I bite my lip, realizing that Caerwyn isn’t quite done hanging out in Saga’s party yet. He is the only Pokemon she owns who can learn that move.

This guy likes living on the ledge. HAH.

This was a nice surprise. Apparently, there is a card game in Zeta that is a lot like the Final Fantasy one. He tells us if we want to play, we should check out the Game Corner.

I love Game Corners. I can spend hours in one.

This counter gives us a Coin Case to gamble with while the other one gives us a starter deck of Triple Triad cards. You get the choice between a fire deck, water deck, grass deck, or electric deck. I went with electric.

Some NPCs will give you cards if you talk to them.

Saga challenged the ledge-guy to a duel now that she has her own deck.

We won!

Don gave us his Snorlax card for winning.

This guy asks you if you want to take a quiz on all of the regions. I accept, thinking this will be easy-peasy.

I thought long and hard about posting screencaps of all of the attempts I made to win this quiz, but then I realized you would get insanely bored and probably just as frustrated as I was. Long story short, I failed the quiz countless times, getting to the final question and then forgetting previous answers. This quiz drove me insane. I probably spent a good twenty minutes just getting through it.

The fact that I play Zeta at 3am might be a factor in my brain forgetting the answers a hundred times, though…

This was the reward.

I wasted twenty minutes of my life redoing this quiz a thousand times for a Triple Triad card.

I actually stared at the screen for a few minutes soaking that in because I was so furious.

To calm down, Saga gambles for a good long while.

I sincerely hope that gambling in Pokemon games isn’t a gateway to gambling in actuality because if it is, I am royally screwed.

Treader Town is a lot of fun, but I can’t help feeling like I forgot something…?