It's the middle of the off season, which means there's nothing at all worthwhile to write about these days. So here's a pointless exercise for you!

I've determined California's all-time NHL All-Star team roster, which features all of the greatest players to come out of California. Note that this is not players that have played for a California team, but players who were born in California. This team includes only players who made it to the NHL, and does not include any prospects who have yet to make the jump (or failed in doing so all together in the past), with the possible exceptions of two of the team's Right Wings who played a negligible number of games (California isn't very deep on the right side, folks).

Forwards

Update, 7:36 AM: But what about LW Noah Clarke out of La Vervne?



(That typo should read "get rid of," but I'm dumb.)

Update, 9:44 AM: Okay, actually this one was a real oversight...

So @JerMeansWell wrote this: http://t.co/qUS4kBAxql Guess he wasn't aware that a certain Matthew Nieto is from Long Beach. Please tell him. — DJE (@dellingson91) July 22, 2014

Insert a clever joke here about California being full of "left wingers." What say you, does Nieto belong in the lineup?

Defense

Brooks Orpik

Capitals, Penguins

Active in NHL 2003-present

Born in San Francisco, 1980

GP: 703, G: 13, A: 119, PTS: 132, +/-: 32, PIM 734 Lee Norwood

Nordiques, Capitals, Blues, Red Wings, Devils, Whalers, Flames

Active in NHL 1981-1994

Born in Oakland, 1960

GP: 503, G: 58, A: 153, PTS: 211, +/-: 27, PIM: 1099 Rik Wilson

Blues, Flames, Blackhawks

Active in NHL 1982-1988

Born in Long Beach, 1962

GP: 251, G: 25, A: 65, PTS: 90, +/-: -5, PIM: 220 Jonathon Blum

Wild, Predators

Active in NHL 2011-present

Born in Long Beach, 1989

GP: 106, G: 7, A: 16, PTS: 23, +/-: -8, PIM: 20 Matt Hervey

Jets, Bruins, Lightning

Active in NHL 1989-1993

Born in Whittier, 1968

GP: 35, G: 0, A: 5, PTS: 5, +/-: -9, PIM: 97 Chris Ahrens

North Stars, Oilers (WHA)

Active in NHL 1974-1978

Born in San Bernardino, 1952

GP: 52, G: 0, A: 3, PTS: 3, +/-: -26, PIM: 84

Goaltending

John Blue

Bruins, Sabres Active in NHL 1993-1996 Born in Huntington Beach, 1966 GP: 46, W: 16, L: 18, T/O: 7, SV%: 0.89, GAA: 3

Let's hope that Johnny Blue never gets injured, because Team California doesn't have a single backup available.

Conclusion

Although homegrown talent is finally starting to develop in the state, California doesn't have a very storied hockey history to look back on. This is not, of course, a surprise to any of us. But one thing is clear: This is a horrible team and it would lose many games.