THE NITPICKER'S GUIDE FOR NEXT GENERATION TREKKERS

(ISBN 0-404-50571-2, $12.95)

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The Nitpickers's Guide for Next Generation Trekkers covers the first six seasons of Star Trek: The Next Generation and contains ten side bars including the ever popular Nitpickers' Guild Entrance Exam and The Creator Is Always Right. It was released in November, 1993.

Comments

Getting this book to market was quite an adventure. I had been programming for almost a decade and I really wanted to get back to the creative arts. I decided to try my hand at writing and found that I really enjoyed it. After writing a series of three short novels, I thought it was time to send them out, get them published and begin my glorious career as a writer. It didn't quite work out that way! Every publisher that I sent them too just yawned and sent them back. (In fact, looking back on it now, I realize that--while I had written for most of my life--I really didn't know what I was doing and I needed some time to learn at least a little bit about my craft.)

So, I decided to try a different tack, I had a friend, David Pogue who was in the process of getting his first novel published and he had . . . an agent! I thought, I'll get this guy to be my agent as well and then I'll become a successful writer. As it turned out, Steve Ettlinger, David Pogue's "agent," was actually a book producer. Book producers usually "concept" a book, put together a package, and present it to the publisher. They handle all the editing and production, supply the publisher with finished galleys ready to be printed, bound into book form and sent to the bookstore. There was only one problem, Steve didn't really do that much work in fiction. That meant I needed to find a non-fiction book that I could write to generate fame and fortune.

About the same time, my buddies (listed in the front of the NextGen Guide) and I had started nitpicking Star Trek: The Next Generation. It was so much fun that I suspected that there were others "out there" who did it as well. That started me thinking. "Let's see . . . I need a nonfiction book with good sales potential. Something that would be a blast to write." Hmmmm. "The Nitpicker's Guide For Next Generation Trekkers"! (With apologies to Douglas Adams.)

And that's how it started.

It wasn't all smooth from there, however. You see, Steve Ettlinger didn't watch television! He had never heard of the show. So it took me several months to convince him that the book really would sell. The kicker came when he called me to say that he had seen "action figures" for the show. Did I know that the show had action figures, he wondered? Yes! In fact, I did. That's when he started working to sell the book in earnest. (I was writing on it all along because I really did think I would get the thing published eventually.)

Steve spent the next six months figuratively banging on doors. There was some interest but lots of questions. After all, book publishers are very conservative in what they risk their money on. A book dedicated to finding fault with a single television show had simply never been done before. Then our proposal reached Jeanne Cavelos at Dell Publishing. She got the concept immediately! "I want to do this book!" she told Steve. And the rest, as they say, is history. (By the way, I am still working on that fiction!)

Selected Passage, Pages 117-119

Q Who

Star Date: 42761.3- 42761.9

For this episode, Q visits the Enterprise, asking to join the crew. The Q Continuum has kicked him out, and after wandering around the galaxy for some time, he's bored and wants something to do. Picard thoughtfully considers the request but eventually turns Q down. He doesn't trust Q and doesn't see the necessity for having him around. Q decides to show Picard "what's out there." He snaps his fingers and transports them a distance of 7000 light years. After some parting words, Q disappears. Having been in this area, Guinan warns Picard to start back now. Instead, Picard decides to survey a few planets while they are in the area. When they reach the first planet, sensors show that all the machine elements have been ripped from the surface.

A cube-shaped spaceship approaches. It is the Borg, a humanoid race who have managed to combine themselves with artificial intelligence. The Borg act as one collective mind with their only purpose to improve themselves. They do this by appropriating any technology they deem interesting. They deem the Enterprise interesting. The Borg send a scout to survey the offensive and defensive capabilities of the Enterprise. When the scout begins draining power from the ship, Worf kills him. A second scout appears. This one has a personal shield which defends him from phasers. This pattern continues. In the first battle, the Enterprise manages to damage 20 percent of the Borg ship. In the second, however, none of the Enterprise's weapons are effective.

Q appears to taunt them. When it appears that all is lost, Picard recants and passionately admits that they need Q. Q smiles, snaps his fingers and returns them the 7000 light years to their former position in space.

Great Moments

This episode has many fascinating features: the Borg ship, the Borg themselves, the meeting of a powerful and ruthless adversary. It also has several beautiful special effects. My favorite occurs in the observation lounge. At one point, Q sits with his feet on the table When he disappears, the chair snaps up and wobbles back and forth.

Great Lines

If you can't take a little bloody nose, maybe you ought to go back home and crawl under your bed. It's not safe out here. Its wondrous, with treasures to satiate desires both subtle and gross. But it's not for the timid--Q to Picard, after Picard mourns the loss of life in the encounter with the Borg.

Trivia Questions

1. When did Guinan and Q have dealings?

2. How many people died in the Borg encounter?

Changed Premises

o At the very beginning of the episode, LaForge questions whether a young ensign should be drinking hot chocolate around the control stations. First of all, the food dispenser is right around the corner from the control station. If the designers didn't want food and drink around the control stations, why did they put a food dispenser there? Second, the tops of the control stations are sealed. Spilling liquid on them isn't going to hurt them. As evidence, consider the incident in Engineering with Lwaxana Troi during the episode "Half A Life." Lwaxana wants to spend some time with a visiting scientist so she comes down to Engineering with a picnic meal. After a very limited discussion--in which the effect of food and drink on the control stations is never mentioned--Lwaxana clears off the main workstation and makes a table out of it.

o When Picard first encounters Q during this episode, he says they agreed that Q would stay off the Enterprise. This is not correct. The agreement in "Hide and Q" was that Q would stay "out of humanity's path forever." Of course, honoring that agreement effectively writes Q out of any more scripts.

o "The Neutral Zone" is a very odd episode. In that show, the Enterprise discovers a series of Federation outposts along the Neutral Zone that have been destroyed. Later, the episode reveals that the Romulan outposts on the other side of the zone have also been destroyed. However, the episode never resolves who or what caused the destruction. A review of dialog for this and other episodes might flush out the villains.

First, consider the dialog from "The Neutral Zone." This dialog occurs just as the Enterprise arrives at Science Station Delta Zero Five:

Data: Captain, there is nothing left of Delta 0-5.

Geordi: Must have been one hell of an explosion.

Data: Sensors indicate no evidence of conventional attack.

Picard: Can you determine what happened.

Worf: The outpost was not just destroyed. It's as though some great force just scooped it off the face of the planet.

Now consider the dialog from this episode, "Q Who." Before the Borg arrive, the Enterprise surveys a nearby planet. It looks like it was once inhabited.

Data: ...but where there should be cities there are only rips in the surface.

Worf: It is though some great force just scooped all the machine elements off the face of the planet.

Data: It is identical to what happened to the outposts along the Neutral Zone.

Finally, consider dialog from "The Best of Both Worlds, Part 1." The Enterprise has just surveyed New Providence Colony. It has been obliterated by an unknown force. A "Commander Shelby" has joined the Enterprise's crew to investigate and determine if it was the Borg.

Riker: Then you're convinced it is the Borg.

Shelby: That's what I'm here to find out. The initial descriptions of these surface conditions are almost identical to your report from system J25.

Picard: Commander Riker wrote those reports. He agrees with you.

"System J25" was the location of the planet the Enterprise surveyed in this episode, "Q Who." So the dialog from these three shows ties the outposts on the Neutral Zone to System J25 and then to New Providence Colony. Later in "The Best of Both Worlds, Part 1," Shelby establishes that the destruction of the New Providence Colony was the result of the Borg. Assuming that the destruction of the planet in System J25 was also the work of the Borg, doesn't if seem reasonable to say that the destruction of the outposts on the Neutral Zone were also the work of the Borg? In other words, have the Borg already come through Federation territory? If they have, it would contradict the end of "Q Who" when Guinan warns Picard that the Borg will be coming now that they know of the existence of the Federation.

Equipment Oddities

o When Q snaps his fingers the first time, Picard immediately contacts the bridge to determine their position. He also tells Wesley, "All stop." Appropriately, Wesley responds, "Answering all stop, sir." However, a few shots later, as Q makes his dramatic exit, the stars behind him are still moving. Did Q make the stars move so his backdrop would be more interesting?

o During the first attack, the Borg lock a tractor beam on the Enterprise. Picard orders Worf to locate the exact origin of the beam and fire on it. The first shot doesn't even come close to the emanation point of the beam. Three tries later, Worf finally hits it. No wonder Klingons prefer using knives.

Trivia Answers

1. Two centuries.

2. Eighteen.

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Links of Interest

Bantaam Doubleday Dell (BDD) Home Page

BDD's Spectra Science Fiction Forum (http://www.bdd.com/spectra)

BDD's Star Wars Forum (http://www.bdd.com/starwars)