A COUPLE are having a baby to avoid disappointing the rest of society, they have announced.

Despite not particularly wanting children, Tom Logan and Joanna Kramer feel they should go along with the general consensus and have at least one.

Graphic designer Logan said: ““Frankly it sounds like a nightmare but people seem to approve when you do grown-up things.

“I’m not even sure I’m mature enough to bring up a child, plus we can barely afford it, but everyone loves babies and I’d hate to disappoint them.”

Teacher Kramer said: “My friends with babies will be delighted that I can join in their tedious conversations about burping and little clothes.

“My parents will be happy too, although I’ve no idea why after raising ungrateful little shits like me and my brother who only get in touch when we want to borrow money.

“To be honest I wonder if people only have babies for the time off work and so they can stop reading articles about biological fucking clocks.”

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