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10:23P 02.04.19 TUE

12:23P 12.03.19 TUE

everybody wants me to speak at their college but nobody wants to give me a degreewake up in a bed, shower, get dressed, head to the garage to turn on the ignition in my mom’s little army green toyota. i love the smell of gasoline. if it’s cold, the engine needs a few minutes to heat up.Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, "Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?" And I said, "Here am I. Send me!"Isaiah 6:8it’s like that song goes, “the bluest eyes in texas are haunting me tonight.”it doesn’t have to be boring? it can be interesting! really time to put this album out. it’s... still called elephant.can you hear me now?hyped we got to work with joe perez on these. out now. limited.i was living in new york when mac miller passed. it was september, 2018. i had got sober in july. i remember thinking to myself, like, damn, meetings tonight are gonna be intense. i was living in bed-stuy and i got on the train to manhattan. headphones in. just wanted to listen to swimming. got off somewhere and just started walking. through the village and all that. that feeling still sits with me. crying, grey weather, really in my feelings.my head was mostly down but there was this moment i picked it up to cross the street. when i looked up -- i saw alan cumming. he was wearing a very tight white tee and black leather pants. the silhouette of his nipples was perfectly framed.what an inopportune time to run into alan cumming. i wondered if he knew, what that meant to him if he did. there’s a specific obsurdity to moments.and let me ask you, when is the last time you danced yourself clean?the album is called “elephant.”everyone's sayingdifferent things to me,different things to me.everyone's takingeverything they can,everything they can.i’m waiting for you to write me offrevival was honestly a great album, i wish it got more love.no evasion of realityi just want you to know that i was hereidea: executedwelcome to the new joebiden.com eptx, i love you.just look at what they did to amy winehouse. man, just look at they did to tupac. it’s all conditional. it’s all conditional.i’ll never be in love with a concept again. that’s a trick that my head played over again.one soft moment at the crack of dawn, that’s all i need.the future is gonna throw things at you whether you want it to or not and i just say, bring it on. bring it on.burn it all down / don’t wait up it’s too late to save yourself / you’re living to wake up and i can tell / don’t wait up i’ll meet you on the run / the bellows are pumping the breath from your own lungs- tlthain’t no point in fighting god but i sure trythe night beto dropped out, i couldn’t sleep. i ended up watching school of rock on tv and then orange county came on. somewhere in the middle of that film, i feel asleep and i woke up near the end when pete yorn’s song “lose you” came on. i remember it being 5 in the morning and feeling very confused.i don’t miss new york in the summer. i miss it in the winter. i miss it when i think about how the cold bites in early january. i miss the way my glasses fog up when i come inside milk and pull for a cup of coffee. i miss it when waverly diner puts the same christmas album on repeat and serves pancakes with syrup and strawberries on the side. i miss seeing my friends in big puffy jackets. the city is so alone, i miss it when the wood floors in the old buildings creek. i miss aíne’s art and the way the street light illuminates its beauty. i miss my friends who don’t even miss me. i miss healthway. that night i was so sick and i had to go on tv the next day and they cut up some ginger root and threw it in the blender and saved my voice. i miss the way new york took care of me.“gave everyone a camera to appreciate the same view”- ghost throwernot throwing stones at you anymore“in a big book at the hospital i was born again and again and again.”lauryn hill, thank you.i’ve been dreaming of a new beginningwish i had a chance to say so longhappy father’s dayif it ain’t original, you ain’t intentional. you make the same record for five years straight and expect us to fall on our ass? why don’t you try and have some respect for the craft. i just sit here and laugh.“i turn the engine but the engine doesn’t turn” is actually kind of a prophetic line when u think about it. anyway go see the king of staten island. pete is the man.“when you wanna let go, when you wanna let go when you wanna move on, move on, oh, ooh-ooh / why you gotta let go? why you gotta let go? why you gotta move on, move on, move?”- kevin/royi’m still not sure what happens when we pass but i do know that my dad, wherever he might be, or if he can even see down on me, is smiling with his mustache grin.i’ve bombed two interviews in my life. one was with a broadway theatre company, building ads in quark, and the other was for facebook. at the time, i wanted nothing more than to be employed at facebook. i felt it would solve my problems, would make me feel successful. looking back, i’m so thankful i bombed it. i’m so thankful my nerves got the best of me. i’m so thankful they didn’t think i was good enough. i’m so thankful for the feeling of buying peanut butter and bread at a 7/11 because i couldn’t afford the food in the hotel they put me up in. i’m so thankful i found my own path.“my momma told me, ‘baby, stay clean. there’s no in between.’”losing followers brings me immense joy. consistently meeting the expectations of strangers i’ve never met, never will meet, is exhausting.on your wedding night you should dance and drink your wine and kiss with lipstick.“if summer stayed, we’d all decay. been lost at sea, for centuries, and you were the only one searching. your misery was a sight to see. the night you split my heart in three. we have the hardest time waking up in the morning.”– billy libbyin el paso there is an amtrak station and in it they make a damn good cup of coffee and muffin. ask for light sugar. trust me.i found an old hard drive and plugged it in. on it was pre-production for album my friends and i did a little over a decade ago. the song brought me back. then i unplugged the hard drive and moved forward. because that’s what we have to do. move forward.i’m not sure a school will ever have me give a commencement speech, but i think i know what i’d say if the day were to come. keep going. when i look back on my work, the work of folks i admired, and the work of folks around me, the thing that separates everyone is who kept going and who stopped.some artists that i admire with my entire heart stopped at that one cool thing they made. some artists that i didn’t really vibe with kept going and now i vibe with them because i understand their impulse.if you want to do great work, just keep going. it really is that simple.sharing art you like with friends is the best feeling. you show me something, i show you something. we get to talk, have a conversation about it. help understand each other through the art we share. it is the greatest feeling.in the zonei’m just tryin’ to do me, be me. all of me. everything. the smiles, the laughs. the tears, the mad. i’ve been thinking about françois truffaut. the 400 blows. he just had to let it out.another rainy morning and i don’t mind a thing. i’ve won four games in a row on chess dot com and it feels good. i’m not a good chess player. i was just playing chess players who are worse than me. i’m obessed with the strategy of chess. it’s a game of details. who can see the most details clearer? that’s pretty much chess. a few games back, i was playing against a person in ireland who was desperately trying to pin my queen on one side of the board without realizing i was only a couple moves away from putting them in checkmate. details. it’s all in the details. i hope you have a good day!“greatness”sun in the sky, you know how i feel.every single day is a gift and i’m not even on the pink cloud.woke up and mac was in my head. even my dreams got missing him.i woke up this morning and there was rain coming down from the sky. april showers, i think that’s what they call it.Have you listened to the Wallows album? It’s too good for you not to listen. It’s called “Nothing Happens” and it’s about all the things we think are really important in our teens and early ‘20s and how in the end, even though everything happened, it’s sort of like nothing happened.Tchade Blake, who mixed all of Sheryl Crow’s songs, mixed it -- so it has this really gritty/polished ‘90s indie pop feel to it.trust the process, pals.