Know what I’d do if I owned an NFL team? I’d sell it, ASAP, if not sooner.

The NFL is Humpty trending Dumpty, headed for a significant fall. Current team owners, having renewed Roger Goodell’s keys to their kingdoms, have renewed the message to its fans and customers:

“We will continue to take you for granted, thus continue to instruct you on how to live without the NFL.”

Sunday’s Cowboys-Giants has been TV-flexed to a 1 p.m. start, the logical time to begin an outdoor game here in December, especially for ticket holders and/or PSL holders.

Except the change was predicated on diminished TV appeal — the 6-6 Cowboys are mediocre, the 2-10 Giants are 2-10 — not on righteous customer relations.

Had the teams been better, this game would have kicked off in darkness and fallen temperatures as originally scheduled — 4:30 on FOX.

And so we again see how patrons of teams with the worst records are “rewarded” with the best starting times.

If their teams are decent or better, they can expect inconvenient late-afternoon or late-night starts, which also diminishes the value of their tickets and, under Goodell, their “good investments” in PSLs.

There can be no more consistent, stronger message that suckers remain the NFL’s best cash customers.

In fact, the last time a Cowboys-Giants game began at 1 p.m. was in 2005, the year before Goodell was hired to do whatever it takes to further maximize TV money.

Thursday night’s Saints-Falcons — two winning teams, the latter in last season’s Super Bowl — played on NBC/NFLN to loads of empty seats in brand new but buzz-less Mercedes-Benz Stadium.

Except for artificial choo-choo noises, the place has been quiet all season, attendance stifled by the addition of onerous PSLs.

League-wide, tickets sales are down nearly 20 percent.

Sunday’s schedule for “lucky” hometown early-kickoff consumers includes just one game of eight between winning teams, Vikings at Panthers.

The rest? Not a winning team among the 14!

As customers are prodded by the NFL to wake up to this reality, diminished returns are guaranteed. Learning to live without becomes inevitable.

Further, with three weekly prime-time-and-beyond games now played, the invites to arrive home at 1:30 a.m. on a work/school night are no longer embraced as novelties but illogical chores patrons are expected to pay a bundle to perform.

As for the product, the games have increasingly been polluted by the profligate. The sport has become overrun with professionals — college men, no less — regularly eager to vandalize if not destroy the product.

Never have more outcomes of team games — several, every week — been determined by unfathomably insufferable behavior of individuals acting on behalf of only themselves. The quality football player of quality character is growing scarcer.

And if the NFL doesn’t recognize then strongly act on that — and it hasn’t — it further invites diminishing returns, especially in the form of TV value.

Though the NFL’s partner networks mindlessly continue to showcase, often in slow-motion, the self-absorbed as those players we should most enjoy, it’s tough to keep watching what you can’t stomach.

So many players now arrive in the NFL with baggage they’ve yet to unpack. Last Sunday in a late loss against the Jets, third-year Chiefs cornerback Marcus Peters helped do in his club with a penalty for angrily throwing a penalty flag into the stands.

On CBS, Ian Eagle and Dan Fouts seemed astonished by Peters’ malfeasance. They shouldn’t have. Peters arrived in the NFL this way. Once suspended from his University of Washington team for a sideline hassle, he finally was thrown off the team as a recidivist bad act.

His team fallen from 5-0 to 6-6, Peters, a two-time Pro Bowler, was suspended by his team for Sunday’s game against the 6-6 Raiders, who last week were without talented receiver Michael Crabtree, suspended by the league for rank misconduct.

The NFL is now loaded with such acts. Yet it does what we can’t: It pretends to have no such problem.

Throw in commercials every few plays, and games unplugged for the totally unintended use of replay rules, and the “NFL Experience” has become burdensome. The promise of a “good game,” once regularly fulfilled, has become the unexpected exception.

And so on all fronts the NFL continues to implode from systemic neglect fueled by an arrogance that regards fans and customers as grinning, obedient serfs.

It refuses to see what it has done from the inside, out. Season tickets, annually marked-up but once purchased in perpetuity or after years in long waiting lines, are now stamped: “Thanks, sucker; good luck dumping these.”

Time to put stop to television golf assists

Does this bother you?

Two Saturdays ago on NBC, PGA tournament leader Charley Hoffman hit his drive into the right uh-oh — thick, ragged, bush and straw.

Soon, field reporter Jim “Bones” Mackay, Phil Mickelson’s estranged caddie, was seen, microphone in hand, helping to find Hoffman’s ball. “What’s this?” Mackay was heard to ask, “This might be it, here.”

Not sure whether it was Mackay who found it, but Hoffman soon declared his ball unplayable, took a drop then made double-bogey. He finished the tournament in second.

But should TV, ostensibly there only to cover the tournament, volunteer to help determine its outcome?

The help NBC provided Hoffman was inequitable in that because he was in contention, TV was there. Such assistance logically could not have been provided to most of the rest of the field in any event.

I asked this question years ago when NBC’s Mark Rolfing not only scoured deep rough looking for the ball of the Sunday leader, NBC aired slo-mo replays trying to pinpoint where it landed.

Rolfing, the next day, understood the point but said he hadn’t even considered whether what he and NBC did was kosher. The USGA gave no definitive answer.

It’s time the PGA and USGA was clear on such matters. And given that TV assistance can’t be given to all — think of the advantage TV would provide Tiger Woods — it should be given to none.

Sorry, Charley, while everyone else could join that search party, Mackay and NBC should’ve stood aside.

How about statue limitations, please!

World gone nuts, continued: After Oklahoma defeated Ohio State in Columbus this season, OU QB Baker Mayfield grabbed an OU flag, ran to the center of the field and planted it inside Ohio State’s logo.

It was an inflammatory, ungracious, unsportsmanlike and undignified act for which Mayfield apologized.

But now, from Norman, Okla., there’s a petition drive — last reported count, 4,200 signatures — to erect a re-enactment statue in OU’s Heisman Garden if Mayfield won it Saturday night.

Yep, Baker Mayfield in Columbus, the Marines on Iwo Jima.