DENVER—Expressing their sympathy for the difficult and humiliating situation he was currently enduring, passengers seated in Terminal B of Denver International Airport told reporters Friday how sorry they felt for a flustered toddler who was traveling with two loud, obnoxious parents. “It must be so awful to have to fly with such irritable, whiny parents who throw a fit over every little thing,” California woman Jessica Henson said as the visibly overwhelmed 2-year-old looked on in mortification as his mother made a scene over the cost of checking additional bags. “If I had to deal with that level of hassle and embarrassment I would just stay home. He must have some real patience to put up with screaming outbursts like that.” At press time, passengers confirmed that the child was able to enjoy a brief respite when his parents calmed down to stare at their iPads after putting on one of their favorite episodes of CSI: Miami.

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