Why should you be the next commander in chief We got a lotta contenders so please keep it brief rubio: we need someone that understands the world today trump: in this country, we need brain Obama’s finally tryna make a deal with Iran Is it gonna stop em from getting the nuclear bomb walker: you terminate the deal on day 1 its failed foreign policy of the obama clinton doctrine Oh, what’s the greatest threat to our nation today? Is it ISIS, Al-Quaeda, or the gluten-free craze? paul: isis rides around in US humvees we shouldn’t fund our enemies We know you love guns, we heard you loud and clear Now prove you love em more than everybody else here paul: look i don’t want my guns registered in washington Why should you be the next commander in chief? carson: i’m the only one to separate siamese twins We got a lotta contenders so please keep it brief trump: i will make our country great again Could you kindly present some relevant evidence bush: we can grow, we can do this Why you should be the next White House resident trump: our leaders are stupid You could be the president! bush: i’m gonna run hard, i’m gonna run with heart Oh...you could be the president! rubio: if i’m our nomineee, how would hillary lecture me? Oh...you could be the president! If you get in the oval office chair Are you gonna roll back the changes to health care? trump: what i’d like to see is a private system the insurance companies control politicians How you gonna make the economy stronger? If you don’t got ideas I’ll throw a benefit concert rubio: we need to even out the tax code the economy is different than the one we had 5 years ago Now that marriage for gays is no longer banned How excited are you to go marry man? kasich: i just went to a wedding of a friend who’s gay we need to give everybody a chance Should we put body cameras on all the cops? So no one gets stopped at a traffic stop? paul: i been to baltimore i been to ferguson i’m a different kind of republican Why should you be the next commander in chief? walker: i’m a guy with a wife 2 kids and a harley We got a lotta contenders so please keep it brief trump: what i say is what i say if you don’t like it i’m sorry Could you kindly present some relevant evidence bush: we can grow, we can do this Why you should be the next White House resident trump: our leaders are stupid You could be the president! bush: i’m gonna run hard, i’m gonna run with heart Oh...you could be the president! rubio: if i’m our nomineee, how would hillary lecture me? Oh...you could be the president! Kasich: God gives me unconditional love Paul: You gave obama a big hug FICTIONAL CHARACTER LYRICS (SENATOR JUNKIE EINSTEIN) on the side of the stage its hard to even debate but its okay i’m just tryna sell some books today and mix tapes on my indiegogo and myspace its not great but its better than drake’s and these fakes Why should you be the next commander in chief? carson: i’m the only one to separate siamese twins We got a lotta contenders so please keep it brief trump: i will make our country great again Could you kindly present some relevant evidence bush: we can grow, we can do this Why you should be the next White House resident trump: our leaders are stupid You could be the president! bush: i’m gonna run hard, i’m gonna run with heart Oh...you could be the president! rubio: if i’m our nomineee, how would hillary lecture me? Oh...you could be the president!