With the exception of the Justin Biebers and Michael Jacksons of the world, nobody can boast that "famous musician" was their first job. All of the artists you know worked fast food or mopped floors on the side while their garage band was turning into a real band. But then you have the rock stars who actually had serious careers going before the whole music thing panned out, and some of them are rather mind-blowing. For instance, try to wrap your head around the fact that ...

6 Gene Simmons Was an Elementary School Teacher

Continue Reading Below Advertisement

Quick, name the absolute last thing you'd ever want to see Gene Simmons doing.



Statistically, about 10 percent of you have parents who slept with this man.

OK, the second last thing you'd want to see him doing. If you said "teach small children," step forward and claim your prize of one slap to the face for thinking way too hard about potential professions for Gene Simmons. Also, that's exactly what Mr. Simmons used to do, before he turned an unnaturally long tongue into rock stardom.

Continue Reading Below Advertisement

After he'd finished high school, this living cartoon of a man enrolled in college and got himself a degree in education. And unlike his later smarmy persona would imply, he wasn't some comfy-ass private school teacher: Simmons went the whole nine yards and taught sixth grade in a public school in New York's Spanish Harlem. In later interviews, he claimed he was fired for "replacing the works of Shakespeare with Spider-Man comics, which he thought the students were more likely to actually read." Or maybe he was just a crappy teacher.

wiki

To be honest, this really could have used more goblin gliders.

Continue Reading Below Advertisement

Also, on a completely unrelated note, Simmons wrote the lyrics to a Kiss song called "Christine Sixteen," about a middle-aged man who has the hots for a 16-year-old schoolgirl:

I don't usually say things like this to girls your age

But when I saw you coming out of the school that day

That day I knew, I knew

I've got to have you, I've got to have you

She's been around, but she's young and clean

I've got to have her, can't live without her, whoo no

Christine sixteen, Christine sixteen.