"Tell me, O muse, of that ingenious hero who traveled far and wide after he had sacked the famous crook named Hillary. Many cities did he, the Trump king, visit, and many hats did he hand out to the adoring masses who chanted his name. And he spake, and quickly they hearkened to his words. He saw the townlands and learned the minds of many distant men, and weathered many bitter nights and days. And America he did make great again."