Jim Cunneely inside his Wantage home.

In court documents, in a self-published memoir and in interviews with NJ Advance Media, Cunneely alleges the relationship with the teacher, Carol D’Annunzio, then 42, lasted more than two years and dominated every aspect of his time at Lenape Valley Regional High School in Stanhope during the early 1990s.

He described trysts in her classroom, in the auditorium, in her home and car. She told him she loved him, he said. On a school trip to Paris, they exchanged symbolic wedding vows beside the Seine, Cunneely said. He says he still has the crucifix ring she placed on his finger that day.

A yearbook photo of Carol D’Annunzio.

To those who study sexual abuse, Cunneely’s account of his life, from alleged victim to abuser, is not unusual.

Researchers say that in a minority of abuse cases, trauma can lead victims to identify with their aggressors — in effect, become their aggressors — and re-enact their experiences in minute detail later in life.

Colloquially, it is known as the cycle of abuse. In practice, it is a wrecking ball that shatters lives and families across generations.

It makes no difference if a victim is male or female, the researchers say. In popular culture, the young male who beds the hot teacher wins attaboys and backslaps. In reality, the experts say, he is likely to suffer the same psychological harm as a young girl molested by an older man.

Cunneely, now 37, said it was only through years of therapy after his arrest that he understood how his past experiences played a role in the decisions that landed him in prison and made him a social pariah. Because of that understanding, he insists, he is not a risk to reoffend.

His participation in this story provides a rare and unfiltered view into the mind of a convicted sex offender. He agreed to take part to explain his actions and to show there is depth to his life beyond the stigma that now follows him. At its most elemental, he said, he wants others to know he is not a predator.

Cunneely said he also is speaking out because D’Annunzio has never been held to account for her alleged actions and because she has continued to work with children.

“I took responsibility for what I did,” he said. “I betrayed many people. I hurt many people. The same is true for her. I want her to be held responsible.”

Jim Cunneely says his crime was part of a cycle of abuse that began when he was a 15-year-old student.

After inquiries by NJ Advance Media, the Sussex County Prosecutor’s Office — the agency that sent Cunneely to prison — opened a criminal investigation into D’Annunzio, authorities confirmed. Cunneely met with detectives several times in August and September. In recent weeks, investigators have been interviewing potential witnesses.

First Assistant Prosecutor Gregory Mueller, who is overseeing the probe, said the statute of limitations would not bar the prosecution of D’Annunzio if investigators find corroborating evidence.

Mueller, no relation to the writer, declined to answer additional questions about the investigation, saying only that his office was “taking the matter very seriously.”

“It’s an open and active investigation, and we ask anyone with information to please contact our office,” he said.

Cunneely shared his account of his teenage years with a handful of people long before his arrest.

Dawn Cunneely, who has since divorced her husband, said he told her on their second date, in 1997, that he had a lengthy affair with D’Annunzio beginning when he was 15. Dawn Cunneely said she immediately objected to her husband’s characterization of it as a relationship.

“I was 22 when he told me, and even at 22 I knew it was abuse,” Dawn Cunneely said. “It’s every parent’s nightmare who sends their children to school.”

Two years later, in 1999, Jim Cunneely repeated the story to a former colleague and close friend, Dan Stevens, after Stevens confided in him that he had been molested by a priest as a child.

“He was emotional about it,” said Stevens, 69, a retired teacher. “He got a little tearful. Over time, we talked more about our experiences.”

Cunneely talked about it again in the final moments of his 2007 confession, telling investigators the alleged relationship weighed heavily on his mind as his own criminal behavior played out, the transcript shows. Days later, speaking with a court-appointed psychologist, he used D’Annunzio’s name and provided a detailed account of the alleged abuse.

NJ Advance Media has obtained a copy of the psychologist’s report, known as a psychosexual evaluation. Initially sealed, it became a public document when Cunneely and his attorney used it to establish mitigating circumstances ahead of sentencing.

Cunneely discussed the allegations during two additional examinations, one by a psychologist at the Adult Diagnostic and Treatment Center, a facility for sex offenders in Avenel, the other by Philip Witt, a forensic psychologist and one of the state’s leading experts on sexual offenders.

In both reports, Cunneely’s account of the alleged abuse by D’Annunzio is consistent with what he told NJ Advance Media.

Mueller, the prosecutor, said authorities did not pursue Cunneely’s claim of abuse in 2007 because he did not ask that it be investigated and because, at the time, it appeared to be self-serving and unrelated to the criminal case at hand.

Today, given Cunneely’s willingness to cooperate and testify, he will be treated with the sensitivity given to any other accuser, Mueller said. Cunneely’s criminal record, the prosecutor added, will not be held against him.

As he awaits the outcome of the probe, Cunneely exists in both past and present. Two tattoos tell his story. On his left arm, he has permanently inked the word “compulsion,” a reference, he says, to how his teenage years contorted his thinking.

Jim Cunneely's tattoos.

The word “penance” lines his right arm. It is his self-inflicted scarlet letter, a reminder of the harm he has caused and the debt he owes.

He speaks openly about the dark corners of his life, inviting scrutiny and answering difficult questions calmly and directly.

His home is a small bedroom in the house owned by Stevens, his teaching colleague, and Stevens’ wife, Connie, in Wantage, in New Jersey’s rural northwestern corner.

Cunneely earns his keep by helping them maintain their rental properties. Some days, he works for his father in Jersey City, converting fleet vehicles into customer-ready taxis. His parole officer visits randomly, requiring him to urinate in a cup for a drug test and swabbing his cheek to ensure he has not consumed alcohol.

It is a very different existence, he said, from the one experienced by the woman he says abused him.

Working with children

D’Annunzio, who turned 64 in August, retired to Land O’ Lakes, Fla., nearly a decade ago with her husband, Paul Sonnenberg, 50, public records show.

Neighbors called her a friendly woman who brought in extra income by teaching guitar to children in her home. She also has worked for years as a substitute teacher at the Academy at the Lakes, an independent school for children of all ages, the school’s headmaster, Mark Heller, confirmed.

“She is awesome,” Heller said. “She has helped our school in countless ways over the years with her intelligence, her flexibility, her great skills in music and French and just being a great gal.”

Told of the allegations against D’Annunzio, Heller said he was unaware of them and declined further comment.

Earlier this year, D’Annunzio and her husband moved to a newly built, gated development in the nearby community of Wesley Chapel, about 23 miles northeast of Tampa.

A reporter and videographer made several attempts to reach her for comment, visiting the ranch-style home four times over three days.

The first time, Sonnenberg said his wife was working as a substitute teacher and that he would give her a message. During subsequent visits, he said she was not home, and she did not respond to a letter requesting comment. Follow-up calls to Sonnenberg’s cellphone were not returned.

D’Annunzio and Sonnenberg are aware of Cunneely’s allegations. In February 2012, Cunneely said, he knocked on their door in Land O’ Lakes and confronted D’Annunzio, asking for an explanation and an apology. He said he received neither. At the same time, he informed her he was writing a book about his experiences.

Sonnenberg confirmed the visit, saying his wife “got upset for a month after he came around.”

Asked if he believed his wife had a sexual relationship with Cunneely, he replied, “I don’t know. Probably not.”

Sonnenberg said he and D’Annunzio began dating 20 years ago, or about a year after Cunneely claims his relationship with her ended. The couple married two years later. They do not have children.

He said Cunneely should take responsibility for what he did — molesting a teenage girl — without blaming others, and he cited the perseverance of his own father as an example.

“My father was an orphan,” Sonnenberg said. “He didn’t blame his parents for leaving him in a bar. He still raised his family.”

The husband scoffed at Cunneely’s claim that the alleged relationship had a negative impact on his life.

“Kids today are doing it before they’re sophomores,” Sonnenberg said. “Don’t think they’re not doing it already. Kids are having sex in middle school. They know what they’re doing.”

Teenage boys, especially, face no harm from sexual relationships with teachers, he said.

“They have control of that. It doesn’t hurt them,” said Sonnenberg, a Sussex County native and a graduate of the county’s vocational-technical school system. “I know lots of people who had sex with their teachers, and they’re fine. It doesn’t have an effect on them.”

It would be different, he added, if a male teacher held down a female student and raped her.

Sonnenberg questioned why his wife should bother talking about the allegations, saying it was clear Cunneely would never find “closure.”

“When does it stop?” he asked. “When does it end?”