

Are you feeling a little down lately? Why not open a Linux terminal and read some man pages . Well, not those man pages that can sometimes make our head spin. I'm talking about the funny man pages that will make you laugh out loud.

But first, you have to install the 'funny-manpages' package via Synaptic Package Manager (assuming you are using Ubuntu).





Just look for 'funny-manpages':



A set of miscellaneous humorous manpages (don't take them too seriously!).

Includes, amongst others, rtfm (1).

Warning! Some of these manpages might be treated offensive.

You've been warned.

sudo apt-get install funny-manpages



man baby

NAME

baby - create new process from two parents



SYNOPSIS

baby -sex [m|f] [-name name]



DESCRIPTION

baby is initiated when one parent process polls another server process

through a socket connection in the BSD version or through pipes in the

System V implementation. baby runs at low priority for approximately

forty weeks and then terminates with a heavy system load. Most systems

require constant monitoring when baby reaches its final stages of exe_

cution.



Older implementations of baby did not require both initiating processes

to be present at the time of completion. In those versions the initi_

ating process which was not present was awakened and notified of the

results upon completion. It has since been determined that the pres_

ence of both parent processes result in a generally lower system load

at completion, and thus current versions of baby expect both parent

processes to be active during the final stages.



Successful completion of baby results in the creation and naming of a

new process. Parent processes then broadcast messages to all other

processes, local and remote, informing them of their new status.



OPTIONS

-sex define the gender of the created process



-name assign the name name to the new process



EXAMPLES

baby -sex f -name Jacqueline



completed successfully on July 9, 1992 at 9:11pm. Jacqueline's vital

statistics: 8 pounds 3 oz, 20 inches, long dark hair. The parent pro_

cess, Kim Dunbar, is reportedly doing fine.



SEE ALSO

cigar(6), dump(5), cry(3).



BUGS

Despite its complexity, baby only knows one signal, SIGCHLD, (or SIGCLD

in the System V implementation), which it uses to contact the parent

processes. One or both parent processes must then inspect the baby

process to determine the cause of the signal.



The sleep(1) command may not work as expected on either parent process

for some time afterward, as each new instance of baby sends intermit_

tent signals to the parent processes which must be handled by the par_

ents immediately.



A baby process will frequently dump core, requiring either or both par_

ent processes to clean up after it.



Despite the reams of available documentation on invoking and maintain_

ing baby, most parent processes are overwhelmed.



AUTHORS

From a man page by Joe Beck, .



Read other funny man pages with 'man' command followed by these keywords:

Life is beautiful. Enjoy it. Use Linux :-)







In case you didn't read the description carefully, there's a warning that says:You can also install the funny-manpages package via command line.Code (assuming you use Ubuntu):Now start reading the humorous man pages by using the 'man' command.Here's one funny example...Code:Output:celibacycondomdateechoflamefloggonggrope, egrope, fgropepartyrescrogrmrtfmtmuubpxkillxlartsexstrfry