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First, the oldest but best Christian joke in the world (The second best is the one about how what was going on in Gomorrah was so bad nobody will talk about it): There’s this Christian guy who gets on his roof to escape a flood. He prays to God to save him. A rowboat comes by. He says, “No thanks, God will save me.” The rowboat leaves, the water rises, and he drowns. He appears before the Lord and says, “But I prayed for you to save me!” and God says, “I sent you a rowboat.”

Donald Trump is religious Americans’ improbable rowboat, and I have $20 that says some obtuse idiot is going to write a column, or at least fire off a tweet, saying “Schlichter thinks Trump was sent by God.” Mark my words. If there’s anything I know, it’s what to expect from dummies on the web.

There are a lot of people frustrated that Christians back Trump and refuse to let his personal life be used as a wedge to pry off their support. They are mad that Christians are not playing their role as defined by their enemies. Christians are supposed to be scandalized and give up and lose. But they won’t.

Now, let’s understand this basic concept – Jesus was not some sort of whiny wimp who refused to confront the establishment and took comfort in his own righteousness while leaving others to do the heavy lifting. Jesus made people angry, because that’s what happens when you defy bad people. Being a Christian does not mean that you have to shrug and let the likes of Hillary Clinton be elected so she and her minions can fire up her anti-faith pogrom against those of us who dare worship God and not the elite she represents. Maybe you didn’t notice, but they do not accept the concept that we have any legitimate interests or rights. They hate us. And, if we are weak and stupid enough to allow them to take power, they will act on their bigotry and prejudices. Baking cakes is only the start.

Resistance is not merely an option. It is a duty. And resistance to evil – because the desire to suppress our faith is evil – is not somehow unchristian because it can be aesthetically displeasing. Fighting back is not always pretty. Jesus cleared the temple of moneychangers. He made a mess and got people angry. He didn’t sit on the sidelines and write ponderous articles lambasting the people tossing over the tables because “We’re better than that.”

Everyone seems to want to tell Christians that they are obligated to give in. There’s always some IPA-loving hipster who writes video game reviews when he’s not sobbing alone in the dark because no one loves him tweeting “Oh, that’s real Christian!” whenever a conservative fights back. I know that when I need theological clarification, I seek out the militant atheist who thinks Christ was a socialist and believes that the Golden Rule is that Christians are never allowed to never offend anyone.

Yeah, no, not a thing.

And then there are the members of the Fredocon contingent, the prissy whiners with their principles and their posturing who think that every time it is revealed that Donald Trump is exactly who we all know Donald Trump is we have to go Full Footloose John Lithgow.

Sorry, but we never go Full Lithgow.

Let me tear the scales from your eyes, Team Holier-Than-Thou. We know exactlywho Donald Trump is. He’s imperfect, like everyone but you guys. Interestingly, there is some evidence he is experiencing something of a religious awakening, but you in the Churchlady Right reject that possibility – a unique take on Christianity, but you do you.

Regardless, we totally, completely, and fully understand Trump’s personal failings. And, as Salena Zito notes in her new book The Great Revolt, we don’t care.

We don’t care because the culture has established new rules and we refuse to unilaterally disarm in the face of them. Also, we understand that if those who imposed the new rules never pay a price for them they will never have an incentive to change them back again.

We don’t care because of the hypocrisy. Spare us the lectures from the party that gave us Floatin’ Teddy, “Put Some Ice On That” Bill, Fernophile Harvey and Slappy Schneiderman.

We don’t care because we are done seeing our morality weaponized against us. The Piouscons keep confusing passivity with morality. Look at how George W. Bush took the high road and let himself be abused all through his term and Obama’s too. That didn’t work out so well. Oh, and the way he suddenly discovered his stones after Trump got elected and trashed both the President and the those of us who spent years defending him when he would not defend himself made Team Turn-The-Other-Cheek look like a bunch of hypocritical jerks.

But most of all, we don’t care because our priority is not whether Donald Trump acted like, well, Donald Trump. This is about survival, specifically our survival as a free people able to live, speak, and worship as we please. Maybe you missed it, being too busy pointing out the splinters in our eyes while logs resided in yours, but this is an existential struggle between our side and the people who want to crush us.

Yeah, crush us. How do we know? They tell us.

Maybe you are willing to bake a cake before you soil your dainty digits, but I’m not. I’m doing what adults do, making a choice. My choice – and yours – is between A) the imperfect human being who has a nearly perfect record of defending our religious and other liberties, or B) the imperfect human beings who have a nearly perfect record of attacking our religious and other liberties.

Choose one. And not choosing is choosing Option B.

Trump may provoke a whole bunch of “Oh, well, I nevers,” but he’s been there for us. I only supported him after Ted Cruz dropped out, and only because the alternative was worse. But he surprised me. He’s performed beyond my wildest dreams.

If you had had your way, Hillary Clinton would be president because Trump is icky.

Let’s leave aside Hillary’s own manifest personal ickiness and examine the outcome you would prefer, the defeat of Trump and the success of the Democrats. But Stormy? No, but Gorsuch. You can deny it all you want, but when you make a choice you choose the outcomes that follow.

Your choice means even more dead babies.

Your choice means even more oppression of the religious.

Your choice means our voices being silenced by government, corporations, academia, and the culture.

Well, maybe not yourvoices, at least not right away. The tyrants usually wait until the collaborators have done their dirty work before finishing them off last. And what’s funny is that when we fighters are gone and the left turns on you, you’ll be surprised.

Supporting Trump does not mean validating everything he allegedly did or does – though it is fun to do it once in a while to watch the liberals and the Cruise Ship Crew freak out. Supporting Trump means making a choice not to submit.

Is that immoral?

No.

You see, there is no combination of facts, rules, obligations, or commandments that requires us to take actions that will lead us to submitting to tyranny. I will not submit. I choose Trump, because Trump, while being an imperfect vessel, indisputably constitutes the clearest path to maintaining the freedom with which our Creator endowed us.

Stop being a bunch of sissies and jump in the rowboat.