This week has been a busy one, film franchise-wise. We learned that style vampire and our favorite surfer/FBi agent Keanu Reeves has officially signed on for a fourth ‘Matrix’ film, giving high school loners and brooding twenty-somethings another installment of their favorite all-black, everything style icon fighting…robots? Computers? Robot-computers? Who fucking knows. We just know that if the apocalypse comes and machines become self-aware, our knowledge of martial arts is what’s going to be the deciding factor in deciding whether the human race comes out on top.

We also learned the title of the aforementioned “Bond 25,” the newest iteration of the James Bond franchise, by far our favorite film series and the basis for practically our entire wardrobe. The title that the brilliant mind at Eon Productions and the last remaining vestiges of Cubby Broccoli’s legacy? No Time To Die. That’s right; the title of the newest film featuring the world’s greatest, coolest, and most stylish spy who has ever lived sounds like a shitty John Grisham book title or a bad 80s novelty hit by Don Johnson.

That aside, 007 and Neo still have the iconic and unique fashion sense that has become as recognizable as any other aspect of their respective films, so naturally, we immediately began thinking to ourselves which world savior had the better style.

Round 1: Eyewear

Bond tends to have the more varied, outfit-appropriate eyewear that changes based on the level of dress, climate, and time of day. Our friend Thomas Anderson has…ONE PAIR…and somehow they work for him and basically launched an entirely new generation of nighttime-sunglasses wearers who think they knew Kung Fu. James Bond may have the more expensive and eclectic collection, Neo wins the points on this one.

Round 2: Cars

This round is a gimme for Bond. Neo doesn’t have (or need) a car. James Bond, on the other hand:

Round 3: Wardrobe

Neo has the market cornered on that dictum of style established in the late twentieth century by the great philosopher, Sir Shawn Carter of Marcy Projects, “all black, everything,” the motif embraced equally by fighters of A.I.-enhanced villains, chubby neck-bearded Juggalos, and John Cusack. There’s really no wrong way to do the all black look and, when done correctly, looks amazing more often than not. That being said…

There simply is no other character in the history of film that comes close to matching the style prowess of Commander James Bond of Her Majesty’s Secret Service, unless you of course adhere to the theory that this life is just a simulation and that he doesn’t really exist, making Mr. Anderson winner by default.

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