CHARLOTTESVILLE, VA – A team of herbologists at the University of Virginia have finally figured out why local supermarkets experienced grotesque surpluses of dill weed this year: everyone hates it.

“Maybe we shouldn’t have called it a weed,” said Rupert Henly, Director of the World Herb Commissioners, at a press conference late in the season. “We just thought that sounded better than Anethum Graveolens.”

Many locals are up in arms about dill sales that they considered “highly suspect” in nature. Daniella Welks, mother of Gabriel Welks, told reporters that the Food Lion near her home had a stand of dill seeds up front in paper packets. Her son wanted to try and grow something to contribute to family meals, and she figured it wouldn’t be too hard. Turned out, it was too easy. “Our garden is over-run with dill. It already murdered our tomatoes! To think they’re going to get away with pawning off their demon seed on young boys is just despicable.”

We tried to track down her son but all we could find was an abandoned “Free Dill” stand outside their family home, loaded with about 16 pounds of the abhorrent weed.

At least some good may come of the situation, as the FDA is now rethinking how herbs are labeled, and are in favor of new “Safe for Dabblers” and “Just Get Mint” stickers to appear on many grow-your-own seed packets.