Age: 57.

Appearance: 1950s comedian.

Occupation: Political titan whose resignation as Home Office minister has shaken the coalition to its very core.

Really? I exaggerate slightly. There’s been some mild interest in the fact he’s quitting.

What’s his problem? Theresa May, his boss.

I can sympathise with that. Indeed. Arch-Tory meets left-leaning Lib Dem noted for his terrier-like pursuit of subjects close to his heart was never going to be a marriage made in heaven.

What sort of subjects? Drug liberalisation for a start – the final straw in his relationship with May. But he also obsesses about freedom of information, data protection, Tibetan rights and climate change.

Sounds admirable. Indeed. Just a shame he added a couple of wackier causes.

Go on. UFOs, which he thinks need proper investigation, and the death of weapons expert David Kelly, who he reckons was murdered. Baker wrote a book, The Strange Death of David Kelly, detailing his theories, and stirred the conspiracy pot further by suggesting Robin Cook may also have been done away with because of his opposition to the Iraq war.

Must have gone down well at the Home Office. That was the point really. Nick Clegg moved Baker from the Department of Transport to the Home Office last year to replace the Torier-than-the-Tories Jeremy Browne, creating clear yellow water between the two parties. Baker’s theatrical resignation suits everyone as the partners in the coalition diverge ahead of the election. May looks tough and the Liberals look liberal.

Will he now be spending more time with his family? No, worryingly, with his pop group The Reform Club. He’s the lyricist and lead singer.

What a terrible name for a band. Could be worse. It might have been called the Athenaeum, or Boodle’s, or The Garrick, or The Royal Anglo-Belgian Club, or ...

OK, that’s enough. Are The Reform Club any good? “The song and performance are banal, obvious and, to use a transport analogy, utterly pedestrian,” said the Daily Telegraph’s pop critic of their jaunty sub-Kinks single Piccadilly Circus.

Not to be confused with: Norman Fowler, Kenneth Baker, Ray Davies.

Do say: “He’s back in his natural home on the backbenches.”

Don’t say: “How’s the album coming along, Norm?”