Aswathi Krishna By

Recently, a mother from Malappuram has disclosed that her neighbour, a 25-year-old woman, forcefully kissed her son on his lips and cheeks and then caressed his naked thigh. “When we came to know about the incident, we asked her parents to take her to a psychologist, but they laughed at us,” said the parent, who declined to be named.

In a ‘literate’ state like Kerala where all eyes are on the protection of women, hardly does such sexual offences committed by female paedophiles (women who are sexually attracted to children) come into the limelight.

It is estimated that one in every thousand boys in the state is sexually exploited by women. The situation gets worse with many parents remaining in the dark about the jarring reality.

When contacted, Childline centre coordinator Sulaiman P P said such incidents could be brought down to some extent if the boys are able to build a friendly rapport with parents so that they can share their unhappy experiences with women.

“Unfortunately, researchers have been avoiding the topic of female paedophilia for the past several years limiting our awareness on the subject,” he said.

Quite reluctantly Ramesh, a parent from Kozhikode, shared his second wife’s attitude towards his son. “There were instances when she tried to force him to engage in sex at night. My 12-year-old son did not inform me out of fear and shame. Gradually, he lost interest in his studies and spent sleepless nights in the bathroom to avoid her presence. It was his teacher at school who briefed me about it,” he said.

Moreover, people are not ready to speak about such incidents fearing the matter would spoil both the child and the woman involved in it.

“Some people are able to tackle these problems head-on without any apparent fear or hesitation. They are ready to consult psychiatrist or get advice from experts. They are also ready to save other children from such a situation by spreading awareness,” said P Anima, an MSW student from Kannur. A sound study in this regard can make the situation clear, she said.

“We cannot say that there is a disturbing increase in the number of women paedophiles. But at the same time, it has become a trend in society which nobody dares to report,” said Director of Malabar Hospital, Dr Lalitha.

The situation takes an alarming dimension as identifying women paedophiles is the big problem. “For, they could easily deceive society by showing motherly care to children. The topic deserves a careful study,” she said.

Quoting an incident, advocate Jaison George said mostly the relatives and friends turn out to be the abusers in several incidents. “A woman who had sex with a child would not perceive him anymore as a child but only as a sex object. Those who maintain a weak physical relationship with adult find happiness in children. To maintain family status and dignity among the public most of the parents suppress the issue. A powerful system should be formulated to save children,” he said.

“Several studies show that some paedophiles feel attracted to children at an early age, but a majority of them develop sexual affinity later on,” said Mini Jaison, lawyer-cum-counsellor.

Parents, teachers and counsellors have to caution children to keep a safe distance from strangers and avoid unwanted touches even from relatives and friends. They have to be told to avoid the company of those who constantly speak about sex, she said.