You guys know I have a dysfunctional relationship with school. I hate going to a regular school, then when I get out of it, I end up becoming obsessed with home-schooling. Which blows up in my face eventually since being a teacher is a TOTAL burnout, and we end up back in a normal school.

Right now we’re in the homeschooling phase—obvs, since it’s summer.

But at Max Prep, we don’t have any normal schedule, so yeah, I took the liberty of giving the flock some assignments and they weren’t too happy. Everyone had been pretty cool with the “summer reading classics program” that my last post (and your responses) inspired, but then, well, I decided we needed to do more hardcore research on disaster prep (‘cause of my internal tick-tick-tick…).

Here’s what we’re studying:

Asteroid hitting the Earth: Nudge (she’s mostly concerned about it hitting her favorite stores)

Nuclear holocaust: Gazzy (he could probably teach nuclear engineers a thing or two)

Chemical warfare: Iggy (expert chefs/bakers like Iggy always know tons of stuff about chemistry)

Earthquake: Dylan ;lkjalksjdflkjlkj he makes my heart feel like an earthquake of love just rolled through—OMG! THAT WAS TOTALLY NUDGE WHO TYPED THAT! THAT WAS ABSOLUTELY, DEFINITELY NOT ME, EVERYBODY

Global warming: Me.

Gazzy was pretty peeved about me assigning that to myself because he said I already done half the research when we spent that time in Antarctica (Never—going—back!). I told him that it just meant I had to do more in-depth study since I already had the basics about greenhouse gases clogging up the atmosphere and melting the polar ice caps. Hopefully you learned that from my story The Final Warning.

Here’s a new thing I learned, though. Have you heard of this country called the Maldives? It’s a group of islands that are just above sea level. But they’re slowly disappearing under rising waters, and if nothing changes, scientists predict they’ll be completely underwater in SEVEN YEARS! How weird is that? Some doofuses think global warming is this super-long term thing that we’ll never see in our lifetimes. Think again, people.

Do me a favor and read about the Maldives online. Then tell me how global warming might affect your own life, now or in the future. The more we know, the better off we’ll all be, right?

Thanks—and spread the word!