



Reason #0.5: This looks ridiculous

Reason #1: Different communities impact school test scores in VERY different ways.

LOGIC: Catch the Fever!!!

Nobody ever cares about the plants

Though still not as depressing as the infamous 'F.E.M.A. disaster cycle.'

Reason #2: High stakes testing and it's subsequent bonus pay leads to cheating...by the grown ups.





A bit like this, only much more depressing

Door 3 has a rabid tiger that hasn't eaten

in a week; let's just skip that one.

If you ain't got morals or ethics,

put those hands in the air!!!





Reason #3: The 'Untestable' Subjects





Pictured: Not the type of synthesizing I

was talking about...but still totally awesome.









Combine that with the fact that groups of students from different backgrounds, cliques, and levels of intelligence must work together to make one product, and you're looking at students that are getting a huge leg up on managing/working in an office environment rather than their peers that are taking notes at a desk.





All that being said...how do you test these subjects on a standardized scale? Which ideas of 'good' or 'excellent' become the accepted norm on which judge how good of a job the teacher is doing (and how much pay he or she should receive)?





Reason #4: Current testing standards are a bit...off.





Never mind that most states use different standardized tests from one another.





The really wacky thing is that according to current federal guidelines, by 2014, 100% of American students should be rated 'proficient' on their states' AYP test.









After the test, everyone will ride home on one of these!









As you can see, this makes the idea of merit pay a bit of a moot point, since we apparently are supposed to have it all figured out by then.





Merit pay for teachers is a good idea in theory; paying people more that work harder and succeed more is a wonderful idea.





The problem is that many of the people that are advocating this haven't thought it through. They have yet to consider the multiple variables and logistical problems that crop up when you try to apply this concept across the board in regards to teaching.





But then again, I'm in a subject that never does any of those end of the year standardized tests, anyway.





I just get kids to learn another language (music), do a little 'differentiation of instruction' when I can (14 different instruments in one class), and my assessments take place in front of live audiences and judges (concerts and competitions).





What the heck do I know?





And I still think that the 'keytar' is awesome.















