Wanda, do you have any idea what it’s like being English? Being so correct all the time, being so stifled by this dread of doing the wrong thing, of saying to someone, Are you married? and hearing, My wife left me this morning, or saying Do you have children? and being told they all burned to death on Wednesday. You see, Wanda, we’re all terrified of embarrassment. That’s why we’re so – dead. Most of my friends are dead, you know; we have these piles of corpses to dinner.

This is a monologue from the 1988 movie “A Fish Called Wanda.”

In 2015 it applies to Social Justice Warriors more than it does to English people.

A recent trend affecting liberal media is the “questions you should stop asking.”

The list of inappropriate questions appears to be infinite, including anything from “have you lost weight?” (to a fat person) to “where are you from?” (to a person of color.)

But here comes my question: how can we get to know someone who is radically different from us, if we feel like walking on eggshells when we talk to them?

If I don’t ask questions to avoid offending someone I will make assumptions.

If I make the wrong assumption I am going to sound like an idiot.

If I do not

make assumptions and do not acknowledge their identity that is also offensive.So I simply can not win.

This can be applied to race, gender identity, sexual orientation, etc.

In the end, I am going to be less willing to go out of my way to approach these people.

Maybe a straight person is going to be less willing to have a conversation with me, because I am bisexual and God forbid they ask me the wrong thing.

You know what? Go ahead and ask me the wrong thing – I promise I’ll answer.

In fact I am thinking about going around wearing a sandwich board that says “ask me anything.”

Stop treating me like this fragile being that has to be protected.

It doesn’t matter if you offend me, and bisexual is not all I am.

I am Italian, too.

Buzzfeed did not seem to mind asking incredibly ignorant questions to Italians, why would they mind asking them to bisexuals?

Do they really think bisexuals are more fragile than Italians? Don’t they know one can be both?

Why do people have the right to be curious only about one of my identities?

I find it more offensive when someone asks me if I ever get tired of pasta than when someone asks me whether I have had a threesome.

The first answer is pretty obvious, the second not so much.

And what about one of the most hated questions of all: “You don’t look [insert nationality]”?

Have you ever considered that maybe you really don’t look [insert nationality]?

I mean, I get that question all the time and it’s because I really do not look Italian.

I am a natural blonde with fair skin and blue eyes, people usually think I’m from Finland.

So what?

If people have ignorant or prejudiced thoughts and they share them with you it’s actually better, this way you get to correct them.

If they keep them to themselves they will add up to a pile of misconceptions that are never going to go away.

I’ll let you in on a secret: people do not ask stupid questions because they want to offend you.

They do it because they are curious, and see in you an opportunity to learn.

You should be glad they want to know more about you, no matter how stupid they sound. This is what acceptance looks like.

Someone who is not willing to accept an aspect of your life is not likely to ask you questions about it.