Oh, the DRAMA! The hysterical, emotionalist, pearl-clutching drama! Not only do the idiot Parkland kids now compare themselves to the Founding Fathers of our country, who were more intelligent, accomplished, mature, courageous, and dedicated to the cause of liberty than these entitled punks – enough to pick up arms and fight for independence – but now, they’re apparently the “experts.”

Experts on what?

Apparently school shootings, guns, firearm policy, and constitutional law, according to David Hogg, who keeps beating his meat for fame and glory and blowing his wad right over the corpses of his classmates!

Hogg, and his little twit buddy Cameron Kasky joined Bill Maher on Friday to discuss their efforts on behalf of their fallen classmates and children all over the country own pathetic egos to disarm law-abiding citizens.

“We are the experts,” the two arrogant little weasels declared to Maher.

Kasky also delivered a strong response to members of the National Rifle Association and lawmakers who claim the student activists “don’t know what they’re talking about.”

“We’ve been locked in a classroom. We have seen our friends text their parents goodbye. We are the experts,” he said. “We know exactly what we’re talking about. How dare you tell us we don’t know?” Apparently they’re not experts at respecting the President of the United States when he invites them to discuss the very policies they’re trying to impose on innocent people of the United States. They’re also not experts on human decency or honesty, claiming the President’s invitation was “offensive,” given that “there were funerals the next day, there was mourning we still had to do.” Mourning and standing with their classmates… unless they had interviews and stuff to do, according to Hogg’s froth-flecked little buddy Emma Gonzalez, because they’re SOOOOOOO busy! How dare we? I dare because I have more experience with firearms policy than both of you pathetic gremlins have been alive. I dare because I took an oath to serve in the US military and protect and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic, using force if necessary – to even protect you, no matter what kind of sewage spills out of your ignorant pie holes. I dare because I deployed. I carried a firearm. I qualified with several firearms in the military, and I dare say I know quite a bit more of them than two punks who cowered in a locked classroom while a murderer mowed down their classmates. I dare because I’ve seen how countries that disarm their own citizens abuse and murder their own people – all while you spent your lives playing video games, going to school in relative peace and safety, and enjoying the rights and freedoms the disarmed citizenry of those other nations doesn’t have.

I’ve just about had it with these little shits.

Yeah, they’re the experts. By that logic, I must be an expert on dicks, because I was sexually assaulted in college.

By that logic, anyone who has had an overflowing toilet must be an expert plumber.

By that logic, anyone who has gotten drunk must be an expert on distilling.

By that logic, I’m a legal expert because I’ve watched hours and hours of Law & Order reruns.

By that logic, anyone who is fat must be an expert chef.

By that logic, anyone who’s had a home destroyed by a fire must be an expert firefighter.

By that logic, the number of surgeries I’ve had (knee, shoulder, hand, ankle) must make me an orthopedic surgeon.

By that logic, being a diabetic makes you an endocrinologist.

By that logic, if you have had a loved one commit suicide, you must be an expert on mental health.

By that logic, I must be a dental expert because I’ve had several cavities.

Are we getting the message yet, boys?

You are not experts. You are arrogant, supercilious, self-aggrandizing little gremlins who consider yourselves courageous and eloquent because you had the unmitigated gall to disrespect the President of the United States, even though he showed you some regard by offering to meet with you and discuss your concerns and views after the tragedy you’ve suffered.

You know nothing, except how to hide in closets and lay blame for your trauma at the feet of innocent people.

You know nothing, except how to suck the oxygen out of the room while adults are trying to have a discussion about policies that affect all Americans, and I am sick and tired of your vainglorious attempts to hoard undeserved recognition.

Allowing exploiters to use you for their own political agenda is not courageous. It’s stupid.

Being rude to the President of the United States is not courageous. It’s immature.

Claiming expertise on firearms policy because you were present when a murderous psycho shot your classmates (even as you stood idly by and did nothing while those very same classmates bullied and ostracized him) is not courageous. It’s insolent.

Denigrating an association of millions of law-abiding citizens as “disgusting” because they dare to stand up for their rights is not courageous. It’s ignorant.

And it’s about time you sat the hell down, shut the hell up, and let those who are eloquent and experienced take the stage – people like Virginia Delegate Nick Freitas, a former Special Forces Soldier, who has seen combat time, and who is much better qualified to discuss matters of constitutional policy, violence, and firearms than you snot-nosed little shits.