, they have had horrifying experiences when using public transport, even a reputed radio cab

service. Further, they have found that the police really do not care and are of no help

extra-curricular activity” near Wood Street. She parked her car close to Olive Beach Restaurant. “I parked in a legal parking spot,” she says. “There was nobody around.”

Women from across the world say they face misogynism when they are behind the wheel. On the flipsideA couple of days ago, expats in Bangalore woke up to a gut-wrenching email that is being circulated among their group. It began thus: Dear Ladies, all ladies...living in India. This happened to me...it can happen to you; please be careful, be aware.It was written by Agnes, a European who lives in Bangalore with her husband and child. Few months ago, she got her driver’s licence and a car to drive around the city — “For shopping, to take my child around and do the normal little things of everyday life.”The experience of driving in the city can be a nightmare for anyone, especially for a woman and if you happen to be a foreign woman then God help you! Agnes says: “Several times I have been laughed at and insulted — that’s bearable; once two men spat on my car on MG Road (without any provocation) and I protested.” But what happened to her on August 23 has shaken her core.On that Saturday morning, at 8 am, Agnes took her child for “someWhen she returned around 10.30 am, she found her car blocked by a Toyota in the front — parked diagonally — and another car behind. She was boxed-in. She “politely” requested the man in the Toyota to move his car so she could get hers out.His response? “This is India. Go back to your country,” he screamed. Agnes who felt insulted, and who also had her child in the car, concentrated on getting her car out. But she couldn’t. The guy in the Toyota car ordered the fellow in the car behind Agnes’ car to move out. He did. In the meantime, Agnes says, the insults continued. “It was abuse,” she says.Once Agnes got out of the prickly situation — shaken, angry and uncomfortable — she called her husband. “He asked me whether I had noted the number of the car. But I hadn’t.”Agnes, a foreigner, was unfamiliar with the terrain. Her child was handling the GPS, some mistakes were made and soon they found themselves back on Wood Street. “Since I came back to the same spot, I decided to note down the car number,” Agnes says. But, it was covered with flowers. So, she got out to click some photos.“The next minute the man/owner of the Toyota car was in my face,” she says. “He pushed me against the car and threw me on the ground, while 10 other fellows came closer and closer.” Agnes quickly picked herself up from the ground and shouted at the group of men. “I asked them: ‘(Why) aren’t you doing anything?’ One humanoid just said: ‘He is right’.”‘Go back to your country’ is something expat women say they hear often, especially when they demand better service or pull-up errant cab or auto drivers. It is also a slogan that can make a chill run down a non-locals’ spine.Agnes says the other men “were just laughing”. She realised that she was in trouble — “in front of a typical gang with animal instinct” — so, she scrambled to her car and drove out of that place as fast as she could — her child was a scared witness to the fearful encounter.“What did I do? I just needed a guy to move his car so I could get my car out?” Agnes asks in her email. She then goes on to tell her fellow-expats: “But…I am a woman…A woman living in India! A foreigner…A western(er)….A white person….An ENEMY!”Agnes does have the photos of the “violent man and the gang. But we have been told that we legally cannot do anything unless we have the actual video of the assault.”Here you tend to wonder: Is one now supposed to film even as one is getting assaulted? Furthermore, Agnes’ Indian friends have advised her to stay away from the “police because they would connect to the gang and possibly rape women of the family”. Is that what expats think of our law enforcement? How did we reach this state?Agnes continues, “We talked to a high-ranking police officer and we realised not much can be done.” She was also advised by “Indian authorities to always carry pepper spray, possibly a knife, have a local police number on your mobile phone and lastly RUN.”Agnes concludes her email to the expat community with a line that is bound to hit every Bangalorean where it really hurts: “I would like to warn other women…please be careful….This is India.”The situation seems grim for expats, especially women, living in this city. Because within 48 hours of Agnes sharing her story there were 50 email responses — and most of them had a personal horror story to tell (see box).Ema Trinidad, founder of Expat Life India and the Expat Entrepreneurs Circle and an entrepreneur who has been living in Bangalore for the last seven years says, “They seem offended that expats are driving expensive cars. We pay huge taxes to India and we provide livelihood to a lot of Indians. We do good for India.” By ‘they’, expats mean mostly the service providers — the backbone of a cosmopolitan city.Trinidad, who says she takes precautions while travelling in the city, had a nightmarish experience herself on August 30 — around 1 pm.She took a Meru cab from Indiranagar to Sheraton Hotel on Whitefield Main Road — a trip that she often made and which usually takes her 30 minutes at that time of the day. But on that day, the driver insisted on taking a different route to avoid “heavy traffic at Marathalli”. After an hour or so — she found herself still sitting in the car in an unknown area. When she questioned the driver about it, he got abusive. "‘Do you want to drive the car instead?’ he spat out. Then he continued talking in his language in an upset tone. I got scared. When the car slowed down in a crowded area, I jumped out of the car and ran to a bakery with lots of people. The taxi driver ran after me. I begged the people (who happened to be all local men) around to please help me. The driver then said something to the men in the local language. Obviously he was lying to save his a**.”Trinidad was puzzled by what happened next. She says all the men at the bakery ignored her pleas for help. “I was in tears. But they just looked at me. Even if they can't understand my English, it was evident I was in distress.” She says on that day she felt really “unsafe” in the city.She tried to call the Meru Cab hotline; “It was just ringing. No response.” She then called the Sheraton Hotel and they sent their supervisor in a hotel car to “rescue" her. Trinidad complained to the cab agency and they responded two days later saying that they have terminated the driver. She is unsure of the information.Trinidad is from Philippines. Several years back, incidents of taxi drivers cheating passengers were common in her hometown in Manila, she says. “But because people became more vigilant and there was political will from the authorities to protect commuters, such cases are now very rare. We have a hotline which you can call and report such cases and offenders are fined or punished.” Trinidad who has lived in Dubai and Singapore says the difference between those countries and India, especially Bangalore, is “in implementation”.“I am sure India has enough laws. It's the implementation that makes a difference,” she says. “Though for most parts I feel safe in Bangalore, nowadays, I feel a bit insecure; especially when commuting, even in a cab of a reputed service provider. I realised that if I am commuting, I should have my travel tracked via GPS.”Looking over your shoulder constantlycan curb one’s freedom. Trinidad says the situation in the city definitely curbs her freedom. “But you learn to live with it. You need to if you want to survive. India will not adjust to you. You adjust to India.More and more expats, especially women, believe they are being subjected to insults and intimidation, hitherto unknown in this city. Trinidad says that Bangalore is “still the most expat-friendly city. But, Bangalore has become more populated. I wish the police wouldn’t be indifferent to us”. There is also a grouse that their complaints are not taken seriously. “In most cases, lower ranking police officers may not understand English and do not have the patience to listen to our woes. It would really make us feel safer if they implement laws more seriously; more police visibility; an efficient hotline with an operator who speaks and understands English would help us feel safe.” Not to mention a helpful local population.A few months ago, my husband was in the car asking the guy in front of him to let him pass. The guy kicked up a fuss, yelling repeatedly, "you don’t know who I am". My husband went to the cops. And the policeman said: “Maybe the (other) man was a policeman. Ha!” I think the worst kinds are the drivers and service people.It is so sad that these things happen in a country they said is the most tolerant in the world.I had parked my car in front of one restaurant waiting for a friend. An auto driver came and tried to take the car keys away. I closed the window. He was angry and broke the whole front glass. I drove away with broken glass... It was so scary. I never drove in Bangalore again...I also drive my own car here. I have been driving across multiple countries for 32 years. I am confident, competent, and independent. I have had instances where men try to cut me off, scream at me, or try to be sexually suggestive while driving beside me. Even though I get really angry and yell abuses back at them, showing them I'm not frightened by their intimidation, it does shake me and also damages my confidence.I also drive my own car no matter what and I also have been twice in this kind of situation. The first time it was a truck driver that hit me from behind. He then asked ‘me’ for money. When I refused, he hit me. Big mistake! Because I beat the crap out of him — martial arts! The second time it was a drunk driver who smashed my windscreen. There was a lot of traffic. And this man was coming in a Suzuki Omni from the opposite direction. We were stuck in traffic. He got out of his car and asked me: Why are you staring at me? I did not reply since he was drunk. So I just ignored him and faced the cars ahead. He did not take it well and smashed my window and windscreen with his bare hands. I took a picture of him and his car and drove off to the first police station. Collapsed there in a panic attack — I have a heart condition. I was also advised not to take the legal route. But it didn’t stop me. I called a friend with ‘connections’, and also the Consulate. It is a criminal case and no matter how long it will take the people will be punished.My American friend, living in Indiranagar took an auto to go to Hyatt, since her driver didn’t turn up.When she reached her destination it was 8.30 pm. She was about to pay the auto driver when she noticed that he had his pants open and stroking his sex organ and smiling at her as he was doing this. My friend ran out of the auto scared. She never took an auto again in Bangalore.