

Oh. My. God.

Bird is the word, apparently.

Per a Wall Street Journal report, the Eagles and makers of… get ready for this… Angry Birds will be partnering up to bring you a synergistic experience not seen since early 90s Disney movies basically paid for your Happy Meals.

The Eagles and Rovio – the company behind Angry Birds – will announce the partnership on Monday. It will include “an Eagles-centric Angry Birds game to be launched in the fall and a marketing push that will include everything from social media initiatives to integration on local team television shows and even in-stadium displays.”

Those in-stadium displays? This:

For instance, according to the team, if defensive lineman Trent Cole sacks New York Giants quarterback Eli Manning, the stadium’s video board will dump the traditional sack animation for a new one–an animation in which Angry Birds character “Big Brother Bird” Terence knocks Manning over. In short, for Angry Bird-addicted football fans, there will be no escaping your thumb-hurting vice this fall.

Uhh.

Something tells me the Eagles splash cartoons, released on the team’s website each Friday before a game, will also heavily feature those pissed off pigeons.

I’m not sure how to feel about this. On one hand, it’s refreshing to see some creativity. On the other… this is super hokey and somewhat perplexing. And that’s before we talk about Angry Birds reaching the height of its popularity, like, two years ago. What’s next? Pet Eagle Tamagotchis? Fletcher Cox Pogs slammers? The possibilities, they are endless.

But one thing is clear: Someone must have gotten a hold of the Eagles PR and marketing folks this offseason and told them to LIGHTEN THE HELL UP AND STOP BEING SO ARCHAIC IN YOUR THINKING AND BRANDING.

The response? A more visible Andy Reid, laughing with reporters and conducting chats on Philly.com. A dead Joe Banner. And Angry Birds, it seems– the article makes it clear that the Eagles pushed the game-maker for the partnership.

Highlighted the good parts, for your humorical pleasure:

Ari Roitman, the Eagles’ senior vice president of business, said the idea came when, like most businesses, his office became obsessed with the game. With the obvious bird theme in common, Roitman made about a year’s worth of calls before the team sold the Finnish company on the idea. “This is, for them, a test the waters type of a partnership and we desperately wanted to go first,” Roitman said. “We did not want anyone else in this country to have a partnership with these guys before we did. It’s a pretty competitive avian sports nickname landscape out there. “I think they understand, and this was part of our pitch, that this is a very scalable partnership for them and if it succeeds and we have every confidence it will, this could open a massive door for them to walk right into,” he said.

Jesus Christ.

We’ll look forward to see how this is implemented, mostly so we can shake our damn heads. For now, though, please enjoy this absolute-must-watch promo video featuring Reid and your favorite angry birds:

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