I just thought I’d put together a short list of “rules of thumb” that I typically follow in all social situations.

Always have your thumbs visible. Thumbs are powerful and convey strength and authority. If you put your hands in your pockets, always have your thumb sticking out. I typically just hold my belt buckle, thumbs visible. Open palms. When you talk, use open palms, palm up. It conveys openness and honesty. Never cross your arms or legs. When you cross your arms and legs, you appear defensive and closed off. Even when it’s cold I fight the urge to do it. And studies have shown that if you uncross your arms and legs, it has an affect on your own brain and you become more talkative and converse better. The only time I cross my legs is when I’m sitting down in the “figure 4” position like this. Never try to impress the girl. Some guys try their damn hardest to impress the girl. This man will buy the girl drinks all night and tell her how successful he is at his job. He will take her to a fancy restaurant on their first date. This is sad and unfortunate because he is doing himself a disservice. But can we blame him? This is what most guys are lead to believe growing up as the best way to “get the girl”. If you find yourself doing these things, take a break. Take a step back. Myself, I’m a software engineer / successful business owner, got my masters degree in my spare time, etc, etc. Know what? Who gives a fuck about any of that. Most guys would be super quick to tell a girl all these things, but I do the opposite. Last time a girl asked me what I do, I told her I was a professional video game player. Off the top of my head, I thought of the most undesirable job. I then went on my usual improv rants and came up with a fancy back story about all of this. She ate it all up. After five minutes of this, my friend revealed what I really do. She was shocked and thought it was the funniest thing. I had fun with it. In the end, it’s actually more impressive if you hide what you do initially because she will see that you are secure enough in yourself to make up a joke on the spot and doesn’t feel the need to impress her. She’ll find out shortly anyway so why not have some fun and turn it into a joke? Obviously you don’t have to do this all the time, but operate in the framework that you should not be actively trying to impress her. When you say things that are cool about yourself, act nonchalant about it. Eye contact. Can’t stress this enough, obviously. Don’t stare at the ground. Hold eye contact with her. This is what strong and confident men do. Maybe throw in a split second smile. I do this frequently. I make eye contact and throw literally a split second smile. It’s known as a “micro-expression.” More often than not, she’ll smile back. Smile. I don’t know why so many guys don’t smile. Seriously, it’s so simple and it conveys that you’re a friend and non-threatening. Shows that you are having a great time and others want to be a part of that. Take up space. I usually have my legs spread further apart than the typical guy. Take up space. Don’t slouch. Get your chest out, head up.

I’ll add more as I think of them, but that’s it for now.

Cheers.