MENLO PARK, CA—Claiming that the banner embodied the spirit of the company’s values, Mark Zuckerberg defended his controversial decision Friday to fly a Confederate flag at the Facebook headquarters. “Facebook considers itself an open environment that accepts all perspectives, and white nationalism is an important part of the conversation,” said Zuckerberg, telling reporters that the Confederate battle flag waving majestically above the company’s main campus would give employees and users alike an opportunity to reflect on the brave sacrifices made by the Rebel army during the War of Northern Aggression. “For too long, Southerners have been forced to hide in the shadows, told that they should be ashamed of their heritage. Well, no longer. We at Facebook are proud to commemorate those good old days when men were men and slavery was both legal and profitable. We hope that from here on out, Facebook will be synonymous with the culture and history of Dixie in the minds of our users.” Zuckerberg also confirmed that there were no plans to remove the large marble statues of Robert E. Lee and Nathan Bedford Forrest currently adorning either side of the campus’s main entryway.

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