The Queen, Prince of Wales and Duke of Cambridge have instructed their senior aides to work with the UK and Canadian governments to help carve out new roles for the Duke and Duchess of Sussex within “days not weeks”.

The three most senior royals were engaged in crisis talks on Thursday following Prince Harry and Meghan’s bombshell announcement that they are to “step back” from the royal family, and split their time between Britain and North America.

Palace officials hope a resolution, in the form of a fully worked out and agreed plan, could be announced within days to help achieve the couple’s ambitions for “progressive” new roles.

Royal aides have been directed to work with the Sussexes and government representatives “at pace”, according to sources. There is said to be a willingness to make this work, though Buckingham Palace has acknowledged there are “complicated issues to work through”.

The couple announced their explosive news on Instagram and their new website on Wednesday evening. Members of the royal family were not given any warning of the move, leaving Buckingham Palace blindsided.

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In it the couple said they intended to work towards becoming “financially independent” in new “progressive” roles which would see them freed from palace constraints, allowed to earn an income, and to promote their causes while also “continuing to honour our duty to the Queen, the Commonwealth, and our patronages”.

It has emerged that Harry had been in the very early stages of talks with Prince Charles, and had asked for a meeting with the Queen. Harry sought a meeting with the monarch as soon as the couple and their son, Archie, returned from their six-week break in Canada. However, the Queen thought such a meeting should only take place once he had discussed the plans in more detail with Charles.

The couple were urged not to go public about the plans, it is understood.

Harry had originally contacted his father about spending more time in Canada and America just before Christmas, but was told he needed to come up with a thought-out plan, according to royal editor Robert Jobson of the Evening Standard.

He then sent a draft proposal to Charles early in the New Year, but was informed more time was required to think through the complexities of various issues, including funding.

Play Video 3:42 Prince Harry and Meghan's 'bombshell' plans explained – video

There was “disappointment” among royal family members at the couple’s announcement. Though Charles is understood to share the disappointment at the way the news came out, he is also thought to be resolute that a solution needs to be found swiftly. It is believed there was no rage or fury, but instead a pragmatic sense of “lets get this done”.

It is thought that Harry and Meghan emailed a copy of their statement to both Charles and Prince William around 10 minutes before they released it on Instagram, but with no follow-up phone call or further consultation it is believed their message was not seen in time.

As the Duchess of Cambridge celebrated her 38th birthday at Kensington Palace on Thursday, and royal aides attended crisis meetings, myriad questions about the implications of the Sussexes’ plans remain unanswered and it was confirmed that Meghan had already returned to Canada.

A string of royal commentators criticised the decision to step back from the royal family, with some describing it as the biggest surprise since the Panorama interview with Princess Diana, Harry’s mother. Others saw it as a declaration of independence, and the establishment of a separate court – a rival court – to the one based at Buckingham Palace.

Royal author Penny Junor, compared it to Diana announcing she was stepping back from 50 of her charities without consulting anybody. “The problem is that they are not working for themselves, they are working for a family firm, and to be making announcements of this sort without consulting is beyond bizarre,” Junor said.

But Meghan received support from her close friend Jessica Mulroney, Canadian stylist and wife of Canadian TV presenter Ben Mulroney, who posted a quote attributed to US singer and filmmaker Gina Carey, saying: “A strong woman looks a challenge in the eye and gives it a wink.”

As yet there are no indications as to how the couple intend to become financially independent.

Their website claims they receive just 5% of their funding for official duties from public money through the sovereign grant, the formula for funding the monarchy. But this does not take into account the high costs of their armed security detail, or their domestic and overseas travel.

Media often seek to justify criticism of the couple by claiming public interest because they receive public funding. They may hope relinquishing this funding strips away such justification, and grants them greater powers to protect their privacy.

The remaining 95% of their funding comes from Charles’s private income from the Duchy of Cornwall. They have not made clear if they intend to become financially independent of Charles. On becoming king, Charles will inherit the Duchy of Lancaster, and could continue to fund the Sussexes through that.

Harry inherited £7m from his late mother’s estate, which will have grown with investment. He and William also inherited her dresses and valuable jewellery. He is also thought to have received money from a trust fund left by the Queen Mother.

David McClure, author of Royal Legacy, about royal finances, estimated the couple could be worth up to £18m in total. He warned: “The history of senior royals making money … is a toxic mix. It hasn’t worked well in the past.”

In 2002, the Earl and Countess of Wessex both stood down from their businesses, in television and PR, after accusations they were cashing in on their royal status. Sophie Wessex was caught in a “fake sheikh” sting by an undercover journalist trying to bid for business, which led to a major review by the palace of the royals’ commercial interests.

No light has yet been shed on who will meet the high costs of the couple’s security. The Sussexes’ website states they are classified as “internationally protected people”, requiring armed security from the Metropolitan police.

While in the UK, it seems the couple expect their bill to be met by taxpayers. If in Canada, which is a Commonwealth realm, the costs may fall to Canadian taxpayers. Shuttling across the Atlantic would significantly increase the cost of their security detail.

The entire royal family’s security costs the taxpayer more than £100m a year.

In an escalation of their war against British tabloids, Harry and Meghan said they now intend to hand-pick selected journalists to cover their engagements, and will no longer participate in the “royal rota” system, which allowed accredited royal correspondents from UK newspapers access to their events.

Amid the fallout, wax figures of the couple were removed from the royal set at Madame Tussauds London. Steve Davies, general manager at the attraction, said they would now stand separately.