Hi everyone,

Sorry I just created a profile because I'm really in need of advice and I'm really struggling. I'm not really sure of who else to talk to so I figured I'd ask for advice here. Sorry for the long post.



Recently I’ve moved into my MIL’s house as a result of the ongoing corona virus situation. I’m pregnant, and my husband is a doctor, so we thought it would be best if I self-isolated away from him for my own safety and so I would have someone to help me out as i’m having a bit of a difficult pregnancy.



My MIL has never been very fond of me as she wanted a more traditional daughter-in-law. I’m not religious, have tattoos, had piercings that she disapproved of and go to parties and I drank (When i wasn’t pregnant). While I was dating her son, she tried to convince him to break up with me multiple times. I’ve been living with her for about 3 weeks now and there’s been a number of incidents that are really really pushing me over the edge to the point at which i’m considering moving back into my apartment with my husband.



I suffer from bipolar disorder (was diagnosed when I was 19,) and am on anti-psychotics to help with this. My MIL was not aware that I suffered from bipolar till I moved in with her and discovered after searching through my belongings and finding the meds in my bag. She has attempted to guilt me for taking the medicine, told me to look at alternatives like meditation rather than ‘putting chemicals in my body’ and is now trying to scare me by telling my my baby will have birth defects if I continue to take my meds. I know my meds are completely safe in pregnancy but her constant shaming of me has made me feel very anxious and upset.



She has also been trying to change my diet. I’ve been suffering from really bad morning sickness since I got pregnant, and have become really sensitive to some foods. I’ve finally found a few nutritious meals that have been working for me but she constantly tries to make me eat different foods because she’s trying to make me have a more balanced diet. When I moved in she promised that she would help me out as much as possible but I’ve had to start making my own meals because she’s not making food that I can eat comfortably and this is just stressing me out even more.



She’s also been criticising the clothing that I wear. My bump is still quite small so I still fit into most of my clothes comfortably and have been wearing them because i don’t want to spend money buying unnecessary maternity clothing that i’ll never wear again (I only want one child). I’ve been wearing lots of crop tops as my other tops are a bit tight on me, and my MIL has berated me for doing so. She thinks crop tops are inappropriate for a ‘mother’ and she has told me that I should completely change my wardrobe to suit my new lifestyle by getting rid of my mini skirts/ shorts and short dresses. I’m still very young (23) and she told me that if I wanted to continue to live this lifestyle I should’ve waited till I was older to get pregnant. This isn’t the first time she’s berated me for my clothing choices and she has tried to get me to delete bikini pictures from my instagram because i’m married now.



I’m so sick of how she’s been treating me. I’ve been with her son since I was 17 and she still hasn’t warmed up to me and it’s really getting to me. I feel very vulnerable and in an ideal situation I would have my husband speak to her, but he’s incredibly stressed, has been working very long shifts at the hospital and I don’t want to burden him even more with his mother’s behaviour. He already has a strained relationship with his mother as a result of our marriage that I don’t want to further jeopardise. I’ve wanted to cut her out of my life for the past year, but my parents passed away in an accident when I was in university, and my FIL passed away when my husband was a child and she is one of our only relatives who live in the UK.



I’m really at odds on how to deal with this situation. I’m feeling incredibly emotional and vulnerable as a result of the situation and my pregnancy is taking an incredible toll on my mental health as i’m constantly drained, tired and barely get to speak to my husband. I can’t go out and see my friends and i’m basically sitting at home all day. I normally like to exercise to release stress but my pregnancy is making this very difficult.



Any advice on this situation would be appreciated.

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