So, this year has been rough. Medical issues arose, jobs were lost, and debt piled up. My online gaming hobby went from casual to constant, and my boyfriend and I became glued to our apartment and computers due to a lack of cash and my limited mobility. Being able to game together became wildly important to us, as we couldn't go out and do fun things, or bond through activities that weren't within the walls of our dwellings. Having never had a computer or laptop of my own, I was fortunate to be able to use my SO's laptop while he used his desktop. It wasn't brand new, it wasn't the nicest, but it ran well and provided me a much needed distraction from the trials life was putting me through. And then, as technology often does, it broke. The back light went out, the keyboard started sticking, it would beep and force restore upon start up... it was a disaster. I lost connection with my friends, and lost my ability to live vicariously through other-worldly characters. Before this happened, however, I signed up for reddit Secret Santa! Although money was tight, and would provide no gifts under our own tree, I decided to use some saved up Amazon credit to enter the exchange in hopes of making a stranger smile at a time where grins were scarce in my own life. I wanted this holiday to be about giving, and I wanted to step out of my own struggle to provide joy to someone else - and hey, getting a Christmas present wouldn't be half bad, either.

When my Santa pulled my info, I received a message soon after, and from there we chatted about hobbies, interests, and our personal lives. He was wonderful to chat with, and I was really excited to see what he had up his sleeve.

Yesterday, I went to pick up the package at the UPS store, and my heart was racing. I'd never done an exchange like this, and I was both nervous and interested to see what my Santa had thought up for me from my profile and our messages.

Upon opening my package, I was brought to tears - and I say this as someone who doesn't cry easily. My wonderful Santa had not only included an awesome toy for my kitten, and my favorite Christmas candle - who can resist an apartment that smells of fresh sugar cookies? - but had been generous enough to send me a brand new laptop, with a 64 gb SD card! (And this wasn't just any laptop. This was a laptop that would absolutely play all the online games he'd asked me about in our first messages.)

Money this year has been so tight that replacing the broken laptop wouldn't be a manageable expense any time in the near future. With all the time I spend on bed rest, glued to the couch, or spending nights in the hospital, having a device that I can use to connect to friends, and to escape for a bit with my SO means so much more to me than I can put into words. This gift isn't just a nice laptop, to me. It's a means of distraction and connection during an incredibly rough time.

I can't thank my Santa enough for this incredibly generous and thoughtful package. The kitty is super happy with her toy, our apartment smells like the most quality of bakeries, and as I type you this from my laptop - without a keyboard that constantly repeats "L's" no less! - I am so grateful for this wonderful surprise. The holidays weren't feeling as merry and bright this year with all that has gone on, but I am definitely in the Christmas spirit now!

To all of you participants who put your time and energy into picking out a thoughtful gift, thank you. Sometimes all it takes is an act of kindness and generosity to pull someone out of a dark place and bring them some hope.

Apologies for the potato quality on the photos, I will replace them with better versions upon finding my camera cord!