WASHINGTON — Like many single women, Heather Lawson hoped she would meet the right man with enough time to get married and have a child. But a failed relationship at 38 changed her plans, and Ms. Lawson realized that if she wanted to be a mother, she might have to explore other options.

It has not been an easy process. Over the past two and a half years, Ms. Lawson, a lawyer, has spent about $20,000 on several rounds of intrauterine insemination and associated costs to try to conceive a child on her own. A pregnancy at age 40 resulted in a miscarriage after eight weeks.

While finding a partner has been a challenge, Ms. Lawson, now 42, said she had never expected the biological process of having a child to be so difficult. “In families of color, there’s an assumption that when you want to get pregnant, you get pregnant,” she said. “There’s a lot of finger-pointing that women of color feel when we’ve gotten to a certain age and we haven’t had children.”

Adding to the pressure, Ms. Lawson, who is black, noticed something as she visited fertility clinics. “Nine times out of 10, I am the only person that looks like me,” she said. “And these offices are packed.”