Being passed over for a promotion is a huge disappointment. While your first reaction may be to hit the nearest job-search site, there are other options if your ascent up the career ladder has been halted.

Chicago-based executive coach Jackie Sloane says that, although anger, resentment and even depression are normal reactions to being passed over for a promotion, our assumptions about what leads to a promotion are fundamentally flawed. “People have this sense that comes from school days that, if you do your homework and turn it in on time, then you’ll get promoted,” she says. There are many factors that may lead to a promotion, but many of us don’t learn them until it’s too late.

Our assumptions about what lead to a promotion are fundamentally flawed.

If you find yourself passed over for a promotion, Sloane says the first step is to give yourself some time to for your anger or depression to pass–go for a walk or talk to a friend about your feelings. Then you can start the process of learning what to do about the situation.

Ask what you could have done differently to get the promotion. Perhaps there wasn’t enough awareness about your interest in the role, or perhaps your boss felt you weren’t skilled enough in a particular area. Look at what you can do to get a promotion the next time. “You need to understand the criteria for success in that role,” says Sloane. “Ask what people are looking for in order to appoint you to that position.”