You know … that thing you write with. On paypah.

We’ve all had the “let’s compare accents” conversation with someone from another part of the country. You stand like idiots repeating a word like “can’t”: “Can’t. Caaaan’t. Caynnnn’t.” Secretly, you suspect that the other is faking a little. I mean, nobody really pronounces “bag” as “bayyg” except in, you know, Wisconsin.

In order to identify someone exactly and immediately (or to settle border disputes) here’s a map that outlines every dialect in the continent. Most of the differentiation seems to center around how you pronounce the word “pen” and whether the letter R is a big part of your life. (Check out the full readable version here.)

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