On Monday night, Stephen Colbert did a special report on a “major conflict in a troubled desert region.” The problem? The lightsaber debate fired up over the Star Wars: The Force Awakens trailer released over Thanksgiving weekend.

An “original fan” who pretended the moon was the Death Star and talked like Darth Vader after seeing the first Star Wars in eighth grade, two tickets won from a local radio station no less, Colbert spent the better first part of his show discussing the online debate over the legitimacy of the lightsaber, especially responding to one Twitter rant about a childhood being ruined.

On a side note, The Hollywood Reporter writes that this Star Wars trailer is well on track to be the most popular trailer of all time, racking up nearly 60 million views over last weekend alone.

I won’t ruin it by explaining Colbert’s brilliant crystal-based argument. But you can catch up on all your Stars Wars gossip by watching the video below: