A friend berated me yesterday, which is never fun, and certainly exacerbated when you end up biting your tongue over something that isn’t even real. Her crescendo line was: “I’m shocked you’re supporting the patriarchy.”

Many speak, write — and argue, apparently — about this fictitious construct as if it’s fact. Actually, it’s ideological theory.

Kate Millett’s 1969 book, Sexual Politics, has a lot to answer for, considering it pushes a set of beliefs that can neither be proven nor disproved.

The patriarchy is the shaky backbone of feminist ideology, arguing that men are inherently dominant and women are systematically oppressed.

It ensures division and paints life as a battleground between the sexes. I believe men and women are meant to compliment each other, not be constantly at war.

My discussion was as frustrating as discussing your view of the world with someone who’s resolutely religious and takes a string of beliefs for granted that you have noted with bold question marks.

Of course, in some cultures men, or father figures, hold authority and in certain religions, the patriarchal model is alive and kicking.

media_camera American comedian and actor Amy Schumer has become somewhat of a modern feminist leader. (Pic: AP/Chris Pizzello)

But pumped up fierce feminists, activists especially, talk about the patriarchy as if it’s an evil and oppressive empire weighing down on our everyday lives here in the Western world.

Not true. Women had it tough in the past, but if we want to reap the benefits of equality it’s time to let resentment go.

The supposedly pernicious patriarchy is the air pumped into political footballs, unnecessary petrol poured on the gender pay gap myth, and the merry monster gobbling up misguided government funding when it comes to domestic violence. Truth is, modern men don’t believe women are inferior and there is no malicious, corrupt regimen.

The concept has a lot to answer for; it’s totally shattered trust between the sexes and perpetually destroys harmony.

It’s a grossly distorted view. Imagine how different people look if you take off those blinkers for just a moment — that’s step one towards achieving true equality.

Feminist theory has become our new religion. We spent decades shaking off shackles of Christianity only to bind ourselves into the straitjacket of a new set of beliefs about an unjust social system. We bought into gender original sin.

We can acknowledge men and women are different without believing “toxic masculinity” causes men to be inherently evil or dominate us.

Clinging to the patriarchy as a construct is admitting you’re seeking revenge.