MUNICH– After months of spy shots and speculation, BMW has finally unveiled a new appearance package for the Ford Focus sedan. B/T was granted an interview at BMW’s headquarters with design boss Adrian ‘Yes the 4 Series actually looks like that’ van Hooydonk to get more details of the new compact luxury car.

Van Hooydonk started by explaining the vehicle’s exterior styling.

“You know how the new Supra is a Z4, but only on the inside?”

We nodded.

“The new 2 Series Gran Coupe is a Corolla on the outside.”

It all made sense.

“See, we’ve been gripping a greased up rope called our design language tighter and tighter since the latest 5 Series. We’re going from ultimate driving machine to please let me die machine. Even I didn’t think it would happen like this.”

As he continued to make more interesting analogies, we glanced around his office, spotting some sketches in the corner of the room. After we requested to look at them, we saw several renderings that were just the current 2 series coupe, but extended with an extra set of doors. We asked what was wrong with that design.

“I actually liked those, but the rich Chinese guy holding a gun to the back of my head?”

“Yeah he didn’t really go for it.”