











The first few days in the wilderness were rough for me. I was stuck. I had no idea what to do. What about a job? It had been over 4 weeks since I was scheduled to work at my wage slave job. By company policy, I was no longer employed there. I shut down my cake business. My Etsy shop had no new listings in it. I hadn't had a lactation client in quite some time. What the fuck was I going to do? My husband reminded me that my blog, raising the girls and the work we had to do around camp was my job now. I laughed until he asked me why that was so funny. I told him I felt like I was stealing the money from people, that all I was doing was logging experiences and trying to survive. Why did I deserve anything for that?





This was obviously frustrating to my husband (and myself) since we have been UBI advocates for quite a few years now. I get it, I really do. However, my feelings and anxiety surrounding this are still present. In spite of knowing that we are all deserving of fulfillment, compassion and life, I find myself unable to completely let my feelings go. I think this says a lot about how deeply we are conditioned to believe that if we do not produce value for the machine in the exact way it wants us to, that we are worthless and deserve to die. I have to keep telling myself that it's ok...it's ok to blog in the forest, it's ok to play with my girls, it's ok to laugh with my husband, it's ok just to be alive.





Another point I would like to bring up is that an unconditional income makes you less hostile. If you read my first post, you'll know one of the reasons why my mom and I have a less than ideal relationship. To give a little more background, I didn't grow up with my mom. My dad got full custody when they divorced due to my mom's drug use history. So I grew up with my grandmother and my aunt, my dad's mom and sister. My mom has told me more than once in my life that she hates me. She has even lied to my ex-husband saying I was addicted to cocaine and trying to take our daughter to another state. I had to take a drug test to get him to drop the emergency custody order.





As you can probably see, I have developed pretty hostile feelings toward my mother. I was even going to keep our family from having contact with her completely while we are experiencing nomad life. I have been very afraid she will call CPS and try to have our children taken. However, this week I reached out to her on my own. Just having that unconditional income each month and knowing we are gonna be ok made a huge difference for me in terms of hostility. It has been near impossible for me to remain hostile, even with good reasons. This has been life changing for me, honestly. I didn't realize how much anger I had been walking around with. To be able to let it go and feel the release from it has been incredible. As much of a mess as my mom is, I find myself incapable of denying her the love that she is unable to return. To me, this is a heavily underrated point of basic income. Feeling secure by having your needs met literally fuels human connection.





Ok, enough of that. Now to the wilderness part. Truthfully, I'm not much of a camper. Or a hiker or an outdoorsy type at all, really. Don't get me wrong, I love being outside. On my own terms. I prefer playing at the park or hanging at the pool. I guess you could call me a princess when it comes to the outdoors. Sneaking through a forest with a bow on my back like Katniss Everdeen sounds cool...in theory. The truth is, I don't like being dirty. I don't like greasy sunscreen, I hate seeing dirt under my fingernails, I'm allergic to bees. Gardening is about the extent of my comfort level with dirt.





This week, my number one challenge was cleanliness. My husband had to keep reminding me that just because we were covered in dirt didn't mean we were walking sacks of bacteria. I decided to really try and let this go since no one else seemed to mind but me. The girls were actually loving being out in the wilderness. They even told us they don't ever want to go back inside. Our eight year old was talking to her sisters the other day and said "I don't want a house when I'm an adult. I just want to travel around and live outside and do YouTube videos about survival." Seriously melted my heart. We have been very impressed with their ability to adapt. They complain less, they fight less. Our eight year old's severe oral fixation is completely gone. This was a shock to me. We have been trying for years to get her to stop biting her fingers and after one week in the woods, she is cured of this habit. It still seems unbelievable. Here's a quick look at our campsite.













After a few days, I found myself incredibly happy. Like giddy, happy go lucky happy. I noticed that we all were acting that way. My twelve year old daughter was talking to me one day and said "I feel so happy out here, I don't know why. You seem happier too, mom. You seem way less stressed. I am too...I didn't realize how stressed I was with school and everything until we came out here. It feels like vacation every day." I really started thinking about what she said. She was right. How could we be so happy without a house, without running water?





It was actually hard not to be happy out here. I decided to research forest living and found some very interesting information. There is a Japanese practice called Shinrin-Yoku Forest Therapy or Forest Bathing. The concept is that spending time in the forest improves your health, wellbeing and super boosts your mood. There are a ton of benefits from just being in the forest. I won't go into too much detail here but if you'd like to learn more about it, click here .





There was one major setback this week that hit me pretty hard. This week we found out that while we would be receiving our refund from the US Dept of Education, they were only giving us half of our refund back. I was enraged, to say the least. I aim to remain calmer in the future but all I could think at the time was "They are messing with our livelihood for money they don't even need. We need it." We were already on a tight budget to purchase an RV, with the cut in funds there was no way we could afford one now. So...tents then. Could we really do this? Could we really just be nomads, traveling around in tents?





I did lots of research on this subject and found that each year more and more people were moving to tent life. I was empowered by this and for now, this will be our plan. I would also like to say that I consider us incredibly lucky that we have a vehicle and the means to get into the woods and out of the city. There are many homeless people who start with absolutely nothing and my heart goes out to them deeply. I don't know where we would be without a truck to get around in and the means to purchase four season tents or stay in hotels and do laundry. I don't want to downplay the struggle of the homeless at all. An unconditional income is desperately needed for the homeless population. Patreon has been such a huge support for us and I hate to think of where we would be right now without it.





There were a few other setbacks this week. The first day we were at camp, we realized we forgot a few essentials and headed to Wal-Mart which was only 25 minutes away. We left our dog in one of our tents while we were gone. It was about 70 degrees outside and she was fully shaded, had her food and water and blanket. She seemed very cozy. Upon our return, we were surprised to see our dog outside, laying in the middle of our campsite. She had unzipped the tent she was in pretty nicely, but then had ripped open the door of another tent to get inside. We were pretty shocked, our dog is the most loyal and obedient animal. She is truly an angel, but obviously leaving her after just coming to the woods was a bad idea. This set us back a bit since we now needed to purchase another tent. We decided to purchase a yurt on clearance at Wal-Mart, which was so fun and a beautiful place to rest.









However, this tent was not waterproof. We caught some rain this week and learned that two of our four tents were not sufficient at keeping out the rain. Another tent was the one our dog had ripped open. We really only had one weatherproof tent, but it was still a tad leaky at the windows due to age. So we returned the yurt, sadly, and ordered three new four season tents for proper weather protection. Luckily, the hotel we are in this weekend was fine with us having things shipped to the front office. Our P.O. box being three hours away from where we are is a serious flaw in planning on my part.





This week we also ordered our solar generator and solar panels . They are super lightweight and compact, perfect for traveling around and it will also supply us with ample power to charge all of our devices. We haven't used the panels to charge the generator yet, but so far the generator charges devices crazy fast. I was a tad bit nervous because it is a cheaper off-brand but the reviews were great and so far, so good.





This week I also had to learn how to cook over a campfire. This went pretty badly at first. Lol. I burned the chili dogs and overcooked our pork chops on days one and two. Luckily, we only use the fire for dinners and desserts. We were able to make ramen over the campfire successfully, which was really fun. We added some canned chicken and peas for extra protein and it was delicious. We have also been doing foil packet meals over the fire on baking sheets. I took one of our oven racks from our house which has been amazing, so glad I did it. We would have been pretty lost without it. We even got some smores cookies and heated them up over the fire, this was a pretty big hit.









The girls have been loving exploring and making their days completely their own. My husband went out with them to hunt for sticks to turn into some pretty cool staffs. They spent hours shaving the bark off their sticks and found lava stones to sand them with. We also found a link on Pinterest that uses food coloring and rubbing alcohol to make your own DIY wood stain. You can find the tutorial here. We tested it on a smaller branch and it works great. As soon as they are done sanding, we will work on painting.









They also got to see some pretty cool animals in the forest. Like this fat lizard and baby squirrel. The baby squirrel was so cute and even let me and the girls pet him. With a fly swatter, because maybe rabies. I don't know, he looked very clean and was calm but I like to be safe.









Our thirteen month old baby has impressed us the most. She is used to a very specific routine, especially for bedtime and I was so afraid that she would have a hard time with the transition. She has actually been incredibly cooperative and adaptable. I don't consider it safe to let her wander like her sisters but she has been on hikes holding hands and loves playing with the bugs we encounter. She laughs her little booty off every time a stinkbug puts its' butt up in the air. Then she pokes it in the butt and laughs even harder when it falls over. She has been having the best time out here and loves being carted around in her carrier. This is also great exercise for mama.









We were able to bring a bin of toys from the house for each of our girls, which has really helped out a lot. They get to take outside breaks in their tents with toys, books and activities. My husband and I have loved being able to listen in on them happily chatting and laughing in their tents at night before bed. It's one of my favorite things. Another favorite thing this week was "bat watching." Our firepit ring was high enough to be able to sit on one side and set a lantern on the other side without blinding us. This allows us to see the stars and also brings out the light-loving bugs and...bats! They swoop so close to us catching bugs and it's amazing to listen to their little leathery wings flapping. They fly so fast and so close. The girls have been in awe of this night time event. The stars we can see at night in the middle of the woods is just unreal. The girls were blown away by how many constellations were visible and how many shooting stars they got to wish on. Seeing them completely mesmerized by the stars and the vastness of space is a nerd mom's wet dream.





One thing that I had to get used to was peeing outside in the dark. More than a few times, I was startled by my dog walking up to greet me while I was crouched and vulnerable. My husband keeps assuring me that our dog will not just let a random animal wander into our camp unannounced. After this week, I feel pretty confident that this is true. I have seen her bark and take off after things that no human could see or hear. She prefers to sleep outside on her blanket in the middle of our tent arrangement, only seeking shelter from rain. Any time the girls take off into the surrounding forest, she takes off after them and eats any bees that come their way. Yeah I know it's weird but our dog seriously loves eating bees. She's been the best dystopian dog that we could hope for.









Things I have learned this week:





1. I will, at some point, be uncomfortable. Whether it's feeling grimey, sweating or using muscles I don't often use. It's best to get used to this.





2. Greasy sunscreen on my face and body is better than the alternative - a painful sunburn.





3. Flyswatters (really more like bee shooers) are a must for cooking and eating outside.





4. I have really taken washing machines and running water for granted.





5. The forest makes humans happy.







