A Few More Thoughts on Centering

While I’ve been talking about “getting centered,” I’ve also been thinking of a handy list of things to do — and to avoid — on the journey to becoming more centered.

Being centered means that we operate from a central core in which our essence resides. Here are a few items that come to my mind:

1

Don’t worry about being perfect. Don’t expect it in others and don’t expect it from yourself.

2

Avoid getting upset because others do things differently from the way you would, or the way you want them to do things. Your job in life is to take care of you.

3

Make time every day to pause, to focus on the here and now. What’s going on? What’s happening?

4

When you feel stress in your body, take three (3) deep breaths, hold them for a second or two, and then release them.

Often when we’re starting to stress, our breathing becomes shallow, which imbalances our carbon dioxide and oxygen levels in our bodies, and sufficient oxygen is a must.

Most of us go about the day breathing more shallowly than we should.

5

Start committing to truthfulness about how you feel, what you think, and your capabilities.

6

Do your best to avoid interpersonal drama. Some people thrive on conflict and squabbles. You can recognize them easily enough—they stir up trouble, especially in the work environment and the personal environment, usually by gossip or insinuation.

If you’re prone to worry or anxiety, these pieces of gossip will fuel the fire of your own negative thinking, and may lead you to unwise or hasty actions.

Believe me, there are those people who do delight in watching other people fight, fuss and feud due to their subtle (and not so subtle) actions.

7

Try to avoid energy vampires: These people are quite a bit like the drama-makers above, but typically they don’t mean harm. They are however, never happy, never a source of motivation or good tidings, and never encourage you.

I’m not saying don’t be a friend—but sometimes when you feel you’re scraping the bottom of your own personal barrel, you are entitled fully to avoid contact with a person who sucks the life out of you.

8

A shocking amount of problems work themselves out of their own accord, or with minimal assistance from us. Don’t mistake every “knot” in life you come to for the Gordian Knot.

Examine the stress provoker carefully. How much time and effort is it really worth? Remember, you’re being totally honest with yourself.

9

Being centered does not mean you are not allowed to be loving and involved. The more centered you are, the more “you” there is to share.

10

Recognize that “backsliding” is going to happen. You’re going to feel uncomfortable not being stressed out for a long time. That seems contradictory, but it’s true.

All change can be scary, even terrifying, and direct change to ourselves is the scariest change we can make. But do not abandon your quest

It’s been said that life is conflict. I prefer to see life as a constant interplay between waves and the beach shores. The waves will forever keep rolling in, and the beach will continue to meet those waves.

Once you start replacing worry and anxiety in your life with purposeful action, you’ll be able to perceive your own metaphor for being a centered person.