>> THERE YOU ARE, KYLE. I WAS GONNA SEE IF YOU AND BROTHER WANTED TO GO DOWN TO THE BOWLING ALLEY. >> NO, NO, DAD, PLEASE. I JUST GOT "CALL OF DUTY: ADVANCED WARFARE." ME AND IKE ARE GONNA PLAY IT TOGETHER. >> IT'S YOUR DAY OFF. YOU BOYS REALLY WANT TO SPEND IT INSIDE IN FRONT OF THE TV? >> PLEASE, DAD, I'VE BEEN LOOKING FORWARD TO THIS ALL WEEK! AND IT'S ME AND IKE'S BONDING TIME. REALLY. THIS IS GOOD FOR OUR RELATIONSHIP. >> ALL RIGHT. I SWEAR I'LL NEVER UNDERSTAND YOU KIDS THESE DAYS. >> YES! >> [ MUNCHING ] >> HEY, IKE! LOOK WHAT I GOT -- THE NEW "CALL OF DUTY"! YOU WANT TO GO DOWNSTAIRS AND PLAY? [ RAPID GUNFIRE ] >> MEH. [ MUNCHING ] >> "MEH"? IKE, WE HAVE THE WHOLE DAY TO PLAY XBOX. MOM AND DAD ARE LEAVING! >> MAYBE LATER, 'KAY? >> WHAT ARE YOU WATCHING? >> HOW'S IT GOING, BROS? MY NAME'S PEWDIEPIE. WE'RE PLAYING "CALL OF DUTY: ADVANCED WARFARE." HERE WE GO. [ RAPID GUNFIRE ] AH! PEOPLE ARE SHOOTING AT ME, BROS! >> YOU'RE WATCHING SOMEONE PLAY "CALL OF DUTY" AND TALK ABOUT IT? [ HANDS CLAPPING ] >> PEWDIEPIE! >> THERE'S LOTS OF BULLETS, AND I GOT TO RUN! RUN FOR THE BUNKER! AHHHHHH! >> BUT, IKE, WE CAN GO PLAY THE GAME DOWNSTAIRS. ISN'T THAT BETTER THAN WATCHING SOME GUY ON YouTube PLAYING IT? >> ALL RIGHT, I HOPE THAT'S ENOUGH. >> MEH. >> UH, LIKE I SAID, UM... LOOK AT THIS. LOOK AT THIS. OH, GIGRRIG! [ RAPID GUNFIRE ] [ SCHOOL BELL RINGS ]

>> DUDE, I'M TELLING YOU, IT'S CRAZY. ALL MY LITTLE BROTHER WANTS TO DO IS SIT ON YouTube WATCHING THIS PEWDIEPIE PLAY VIDEO GAMES. I SWEAR I DON'T UNDERSTAND KIDS THESE DAYS. >> WHAT'S A PEWDIEPIE DO? >> GOOGLE HIM! HE'S THIS GUY FROM SWEDEN WHO HAS OVER 30 MILLION YouTube SUBSCRIBERS. WE DIDN'T EVEN KNOW, BUT HE'S A BIGGER CELEBRITY TO KIDS THAN ANYONE. IT'S JUST SEEMS SO LAME. >> HE PLAYS VIDEO GAMES AND MAKES MILLIONS OF DOLLARS, AND IT'S LAME HOW? >> BECAUSE -- BECAUSE THAT'S NOT EVEN ENTERTAINMENT. I MEAN, IT'S JUST -- JUST REHASHING SHIT, ISN'T IT? IT'S LIKE EVERYTHING THESE KIDS ARE INTO THESE DAYS, YOU KNOW. IT'S JUST...REHASHED SHIT. [ POP MUSIC PLAYING ] >> THIS SATURDAY... >> AT THE PEPSI CENTER... >> IT'S WOMEN OF [Echoing] ROCK! [ INDISTINCT SINGING ] >> MILEY CYRUS. >> IGGY AZALEA. >> NICKI MINAJ. >> AND LORDE! >> ALL ON ONE STAGE... >> ON ONE NIGHT! >> WITH A SPECIAL APPEARANCE BY MICHAEL JACKSON'S HOLOGRAM. >> HEE, HEE >> TICKET PROCEED HELP FIGHT THE GLUTEN CRISIS IN WEST AFRICA. IT'S A NIGHT OF PURE... >> PURE ESTROGEN! >> TICKETS ON SALE NOW. [ DOOR CREAKS ]

>> ALL I WANTED WAS TO PLAY ONE LEVEL OF "CALL OF DUTY," AND YOU KNOW WHAT IKE TOLD ME? HE SAID THE LIVING ROOM IS FOR OLD PEOPLE. >> I DON'T GET IT. THE WHOLE FUN OF "CALL OF DUTY" IS THAT YOU GET TO DO THE SHOOTING. >> I KNOW! BUT THAT DOESN'T MATTER ANYMORE! THESE KIDS DON'T WANT TO PLAY THE GAME! THEY JUST WANT TO WATCH PEOPLE ON YouTube PLAY IT! AND YOU KNOW WHY? COMMENTARY. >> MRPHRMHRMPHM? >> YEAH. YOU USED TO SIT IN THE LIVING ROOM WITH FAMILY AND FRIENDS TO HEAR THEIR COMMENTARY ON THINGS. NOW YOU CAN GET IT WITH A LITTLE GUY IN A WINDOW ON THE SCREEN, SOMEONE WHO JUST COMMENTS ON STUFF. I MEAN, REALLY, WHO WOULD EVEN WANT TO DO THAT? >> HEY, BROS, WHAT'S GOING ON? THIS IS CartmanBra! BE SURE TO SUBSCRIBE TO MY CHANNEL IF YOU HAVEN'T ALREADY... [ High-pitched voice ] 'CAUSE SUBSCRIBIN' MAKES YOU FEEL GOOD UH, SO, TODAY I'M GONNA COMMENT ON "CALL OF DUTY." MORE SPECIFICALLY, I'M GOING TO COMMENT ON MY FRIENDS COMMENTING ON "CALL OF DUTY," SO LET'S START. >> ALL I WANTED WAS TO PLAY ONE LEVEL OF "CALL OF DUTY," AND YOU KNOW WHAT IKE TOLD ME? >> THAT'S KYLE THE JEW AGAIN, TALKING ABOUT "CALL OF DUTY" TO STAN. >> HE SAID THE LIVING ROOM IS FOR OLD PEOPLE. >> I DON'T GET IT. THE WHOLE FUN OF "CALL OF DUTY" IS THAT YOU GET TO DO THE SHOOTING. >> [ LAUGHS ] STAN IS SUCH A DOUCHEBAG. >> I KNOW! BUT THAT DOESN'T MATTER ANYMORE! >> HE JUST AGREES WITH KYLE NO MATTER WHAT. >> THESE KIDS DON'T WANT TO PLAY THE GAME. THEY JUST WANT TO WATCH PEOPLE ON YouTube PLAY IT. >> MRPHRMHRMPHM? >> THERE'S KENNY COMMENTING ON "CALL OF DUTY." >> YEAH. YOU USED TO SIT IN THE LIVING ROOM WITH FAMILY AND FRIENDS TO HEAR THEIR COMMENTARY ON THINGS. >> KENNY! KENNY! SPEAK UP! SPEAK THROUGH THE HOOD, KENNY! [ DISHES CLANKING

>> UH, SO, TODAY I'M GONNA COMMENT ON "CALL OF DUTY." >> HEY, IKE, YOU WANT TO COME WATCH TV WITH ME? >> MORE SPECIFICALLY, I'M GOING TO COMMENT ON MY FRIENDS COMMENTING ON "CALL OF DUTY, SO LET'S START. >> OH, NO. NO, IKE. YOU ARE NOT WATCHING HIM COMMENT ON THINGS! >> ALL I WANTED WAS TO PLAY ONE LEVEL OF "CALL OF DUTY," AND YOU KNOW WHAT IKE TOLD ME? >> THAT'S KYLE THE JEW AGAIN, TALKING ABOUT "CALL OF DUTY" TO STAN. >> HE SAID THE LIVING ROOM IS FOR OLD PEOPLE. WHAT THE [BLEEP] >> I DON'T GET IT. THE WHOLE FUN OF "CALL OF DUTY" IS THAT YOU GET TO DO THE SHOOTING. >> [ LAUGHS ] STAN IS SUCH A DOUCHEBAG. HE JUST AGREES WITH KYLE NO MATTER WHAT. >> IKE, THAT IS ENOUGH. IF YOU'RE INTERESTED IN "CALL OF DUTY," THEN GO PLAY IT DOWNSTAIRS IN THE LIVING ROOM! >> THEY JUST WANT TO WATCH PEOPLE ON YouTube PLAY IT! >> GOD, THESE GUYS ARE SO ANNOYING AREN'T THEY? >> AND YOU KNOW WHY? COMMENTARY. >> CartmanBra! >> YEAH. YOU USED TO SIT IN THE LIVING ROOM... >> CartmanBra! >> ...WITH FAMILY AND FRIENDS TO HEAR THEIR COMMENTARY ON... WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?! >> SHOOTING FOR THE "D" IN A GAME OF "HORSEDICK." >> YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN! WHY IS MY LITTLE BROTHER WATCHING YOU TALKING ABOUT US TALKING ABOUT HIM? >> I HAVE A YouTube BLOG WHERE I COMMENT ON VIDEO GAMES. BIG WHOOP. >> I DON'T NEED IKE LISTENING TO YOU COMMENT ON ANYTHING! >> WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? >> THIS FAT [BLEEP] THINKS HE'S PEWDIEPIE. BECAUSE OF HIM, I CAN'T GET IKE TO COME OUT OF HIS ROOM! >> BECAUSE OF ME? I'M PRETTY SURE I'M NOT THE PERSON WHO INVENTED LET'S PLAYS, KYLE. >> LET'S PLAYS? >> THAT'S WHAT THEY'RE CALLED, DUDE. GET WITH THE TIMES. [ POP MUSIC PLAYING ] THERE'S A PARTY GOING ON, AND

IT'S ALL RIGHT HERE YEAH-AH-AH THROW MY HANDS IN THE AIR WHILE I'M TWERKING THIS CHAIR THERE'S A PARTY GOING ON AND IT'S ALL RIGHT HERE YEAH-AH-AH AND I'M MOVING MY HANDS WHILE I'M SHAKING MY TITS >> ALL RIGHT, GUYS, UH, MILEY'S ABOUT TO FINISH UP HER SET, SO NEXT WE'LL NEED YOU, NICKI MINAJ, THEN IGGY AZALEA, WHO WILL BE PERFORMING WITH A HOLOGRAM OF MICHAEL JACKSON, AND THEN FINALLY YOU, LORDE. HAVE A GREAT SHOW, LADIES! >> HEY, UH, LISTEN -- I-I THOUGHT I COULD DO THIS, BUT IT'S NOT GONNA WORK. >> YOU'RE NERVOUS. IT'S UNDERSTANDABLE. >> NO, I'M -- I KNOW FOR A FACT THAT I DON'T SOUND THE SAME LIVE. >> YOU THINK THOSE PEOPLE OUT THERE CARE WHAT YOU SOUND LIKE? YOU'RE JUST ANOTHER FEMALE POP STAR. JUST GO OUT THERE, PUMP YOUR HIPS, AND RUB YOUR CLIT. >> HEY! THAT'S NOT WHAT MY MUSIC IS ABOUT! I'M NOT REDUCING MYSELF TO THAT! >> [ British accent ] OH [BLEEP] YOU, LORDE. YOU THINK YOU'RE SO MUCH BETTER THAN EVERYONE. >> NO, I DON'T, IGGY. I JUST THINK THAT OUR YOUNGER GIRL FANS NEED SOMETHING A LITTLE MORE POSITIVE AS ROLE MODELS. >> THAT'S EASY FOR YOU TO SAY BECAUSE YOU DON'T HAVE A NICE BODY! IS THAT WHY YOU'RE SO HIGH AND MIGHTY, LORDE -- BECAUSE YOU'RE JEALOUS OF THIS BOOTY?! >> "IGGS," I REALLY DON'T CARE TO GO THROUGH THIS AGAIN WITH YOU. >> 'CAUSE LET'S FACE IT -- YOU GOT LEGS THAT LOOK LIKE A HORSE! >> [BLEEP] YOU! >> AAH! [ GRUNTING ] [ GLASS BREAKING ] >> ALL RIGHT, THAT'S ENOUGH! LOOK AT YOURSELVES! >> YOU'RE AN INTERNET BULLSHIT ARTIST, LORDE! [ DOORBELL RINGS ]

>> HEY. WHAT'S UP? >> YOU'RE NOT GONNA BELIEVE THIS. >> OH, NO. WHAT NOW? >> I WANTED TO GET IKE OUT OF HIS ROOM, SO I INVITED ALL HIS FRIENDS OVER FOR A SLUMBER PARTY TO PLAY "DRAGON AGE: INQUISITION." >> YEAH? >> COME ON. >> [ Laughing ] ...JUST LAYING THERE. [ LAUGHS ] >> YOU SEE? LOOK AT THIS. IKE HAS ALL HIS FRIENDS OVER, AND THEY'RE JUST SITTING AROUND ON THEIR OWN COMPUTERS, BARELY TALKING TO EACH OTHER. IKE IS WATCHING PEWDIEPIE PLAY "DRAGON AGE." >> I'M GOING -- DUN-DUN, DA-DA-DUN-DUN, DA-DA-DAN >> PEWDIEPIE! >> AND THIS KID IS WATCHING CARTMAN COMMENTING ON PEOPLE COMMENTING ON "DRAGON AGE"! >> IT'S A REALLY GREAT GAME. THE CHARACTERS ARE SO RICH! >> BUTTERS IS SUCH A BUTTHOLE. OH, MY GOD. CartmanBra! >> CartmanBra! >> DUDE, VIDEO GAMES ARE MEANT TO BE PLAYED IN A LIVING ROOM, NOT SOMETHING TO WATCH PEOPLE COMMENT ON. >> OKAY, GRANDPA, WE'LL BE SURE TO KEEP THAT IN MIND. [ LAUGHTER ] >> "GRANDPA"?! >> THIS IS HOW THEY TALK TO US. YOU BETTER WATCH YOUR MOUTH, KID! >> YEAH, CONNER. WE'RE SUPPOSED TO RESPECT OUR ELDERS, REMEMBER? >> IT'S BEST TO JUST MAKE OLD PEOPLE THINK THEY MATTER. >> OH, IS THAT RIGHT? DO YOU EVEN KNOW HOW TO MULTIPLY? >> NO, SIR. THANK GOODNESS WE HAVE YOU TO DO THAT. >> [ LAUGHS ] >> WE'RE NOT BEING GRANDPAS. YOUR GUYS' STUFF IS JUST SERIOUSLY LAME. OUR GENERATION'S STUFF IS COOL. >> OH, MY GOD, I KILLED HIM! [ POP MUSIC PLAYING ]

HEY, HEY >> MISSY, MISSY, MISSY >> MISSY WHO, WHO? THAT'S ALL I DO >> IS RIP OFF MISSY >> MISSY WHO? >> MISSY WHO? >> MISSY WHO? MISSY WHO? MISSY WHO, WHO? MISSY WHO, WHO? >> MISSY, MISSY, MISSY WHO? >> ALL RIGHT, BITCHES AND HOS, HERE HE IS, VIA HOLOGRAM AND SHIT -- MICHAEL JACKSON! >> AND CUE THE HOLOGRAM! [ MICHAEL JACKSON'S "BILLIE JEAN" PLAYS ] >> HEE HEE >> THEY SHOULDN'T REHASH DEAD PEOPLE. IT'S SO WRONG. >> OH, LORDE, YOU'RE SUCH A PUREST.

>> HI, EVERYBODY! I LOVE YOU! >> THANKS FOR LOVING ME! I LOVE YOU, TOO! >> SO, I GUESS THERE'S THIS NEW TREND WITH YOUNG PEOPLE WHERE THE CELEBRITIES THEY LOOK UP TO MOST ARE YouTube COMMENTATORS, JUST ORDINARY PEOPLE WHO SIT IN FRONT OF A MIKE AND BLAB THEIR OPINIONS ABOUT EVERYTHING WHILE THEIR MINDLESS, LOYAL FOLLOWERS CHEER THEM ON. ISN'T THAT CRAZY? [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] >> WELL, LET'S MEET ONE OF THESE STARS OF THE INTERNET. PLEASE WELCOME CartmanBra. >> CartmanBra! >> SO, CAN YOU EXPLAIN TO OUR AUDIENCE MEMBERS OVER THE AGE OF 5 WHAT IT IS THAT YOU DO? >> WELL, WENDY, I STARTED BY TALKING ABOUT PEOPLE TALKING ABOUT VIDEO GAMES, BUT NOW I'M BRANCHING OUT INTO TALKING ABOUT PEOPLE TALKING ABOUT MUSIC AND THE ARTS, AS WELL. >> AND WHY DO YOU THINK YOUNG PEOPLE -- >> CartmanBra! >> WHY DO YOU THINK YOUNG PEOPLE ARE RESPONDING TO THIS? >> [ Mockingly ] WHY DAH YOU THIN' YOUNG PERPEL ARE PAPONDIN' TO DER? >> I'M ASKING YOU A QUESTION. >> [ Mockingly ] I'M ATTING YOU A QUESTO. WHY DAH DU QUA -- AAH! CartmanBra! [ Quickly] CartmanBra! BE SURE TO SUBSCRIBE TO MY CHANNEL, BRAHS.

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] >> AND NOW GIVE IT UP FOR THE GIRL FROM NEW ZEALAND -- LORDE! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] >> THANK YOU! THANKS A LOT! THIS IS FOR ALL THE ROYALS OUT THERE! LORDE, LORDE I'M LORDE, LA, LA, LA SITTING ON THE TOILET THINKING 'BOUT I'M NOT AS RICH AS OTHER PEOPLE, YA, YA, YA YA, YA, YA, YA I'LL NEVER BE, I'LL NEVER BE ROYALTY [ CHEERING STOPS ] YA, YA, YA BUT THAT'D BE NICE 'CAUSE THAT'D BE NICE FANTASY WOMAN'S BATHROOM SMELLS SO NICE, YA, YA, YA, YA, YA, YA [ BOOING ] AND WE'LL NEVER BE LORDE, LORDE, LORDE LORDE FLUSHING, LORDE, LORDE, LORDE, LO-- UH, OKAY. [ FEEDBACK ] OH, GOD. SORRY. [ BOOING CONTINUES ] UH, HOLD ON. HANG ON. [ HOLOGRAM BLOOPS ] >> HEE, HEE! I'M FREE! I'M FREE! >> SORRY, FOLKS. JUST ONE SECOND HERE. >> HEE HEE! DA-DA-DIT DA-DIT! >> STOP HIM! MICHAEL JACKSON'S HOLOGRAM IS ON THE LOOSE. >> HEE HEE! [ BOOING CONTINUES ] >> OH, YA, YA OKAY, UH... AH, YA, YA, YA, YA [ BOOING CONTINUES ] OKAY, UH, UH... OOH! OH, YEAH! OH, MY CLIT! OH, YEAH! OOH, YEAH. FLICK THAT BEAN. YEAH. [ BOOING CONTINUES ] OH, I'M SO HORNY. YEAH. OOH, [BLEEP] MY CLIT'S SO BIG. OOH.

>> COULD YOU, UM, PASS THE POTATOES, STAN? GREAT. THANKS. WELL, NOBODY'S TALKING. DOESN'T ANYONE HAVE ANYTHING TO TALK ABOUT? >> WHY DID YOU HAVE TO RUB YOUR CLIT ONSTAGE, DAD? >> I WAS TOLD TO. >> YOU WERE TOLD TO WALK OUT IN FRONT OF 100,000 PEOPLE, INCLUDING LITTLE GIRLS WHO LOOK UP TO YOU, AND START RUBBING YOUR CLIT? >> OKAY, HOLD ON. "A," I DON'T HAVE A CLIT, SO TECHNICALLY, I WASN'T RUBBING ANYTHING. AND "B," I DIDN'T WANT TO EVEN PERFORM TONIGHT, BUT STANLEY GAVE ALL OUR MONEY TO CANADA THROUGH A FREEMIUM GAME, SO IF ANYONE RUBBED THEIR CLIT, IT WAS HIM. >> [ SCOFFS ] >> [ SOBBING ] [ SQUEAKS ] >> IT'S DYING. THE LIVING ROOM IS DYING. >> YEAH, IT'S ME. I NEED TO FIX THIS. HOW CAN I UNDO THE CLIT RUBBING? >> WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? IT'S GREAT! YOU'RE THE MOST COMMENTED-ON ARTIST IN THE WORLD RIGHT NOW. YOU'RE BLOWING UP TWITTER AND YOU'RE TRENDING ON CartmanBra. #clitnubbin. >> LOOK, THIS ISN'T WHAT I WANT. MY MUSIC IS SUPPOSED TO BE -- >> IT'S NOT ABOUT THE MUSIC, LORDE. IT NEVER WAS. IT'S ABOUT COMMENTS. AND, SISTER, YOU'VE GOT 'EM. >> THIS ENDS NOW. I'M GONNA TELL PEOPLE THE TRUTH.

>> WILL YOU LOOK AT THAT. EVERYONE ON THEIR CELLPHONES. NOBODY SAYING A WORD TO EACH OTHER. CALL ME A GRANDPA, BUT I STILL LIKE COMMENTING FACE-TO-FACE WITH FOLKS. YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN, BUDDY? >> YES. >> YOU'RE HEADING UP TO THE MOUNTAINS, TOO, HUH? GONNA DO SOME SKIING? >> NO, I JUST NEED TO...TAKE CARE OF SOME...IMPORTANT BUSINESS. >> OH, WHAT KIND OF BUSINESS? ARE YOU A FISHERMAN? >> YES. I MEAN, YES. THAT'S ALL. I'M -- I'M JUST GONNA FISH AND HUNT. >> OH, YOU'RE A HUNTER. WHAT DO YOU PREY UPON? >> NOBODY! THAT'S IGNORANT! >> WELL, YOU MUST HAVE A FAVORITE KIND OF PREY. >> ALLEGEDLY. ALLEGEDLY! THAT'S IGNORANT! >> YOU KNOW, EXCUSE ME FOR SAYING SO, BUT...YOU SEEM KIND OF...TRANSPARENT. >> THAT'S IGNORANT. I'M JUST COLD. >> I'M SAYING IT MUST MAKE IT EASIER TO SNEAK UP ON YOUR PREY. >> ALLEGEDLY! I'M WEARY OF THIS CONVERSATION. CAN WE PLEASE STOP TALKING? PLEASE? IGNORANT. >> WELL, WHATEVER IT IS YOU'RE AFTER, I HOPE YOU GET IT. >> OH, I WILL. TRUST ME. I WILL.

>> OH, WE'VE LOST ANY ABILITY TO TRACK THE HOLOGRAM'S LOCATION. IT -- IT LOOKS LIKE IT REPROGRAMMED ITS GUIDANCE SYSTEMS. >> WE PAID A LOT OF MONEY FOR THAT HOLOGRAM. YOU BETTER FIND A WAY TO GET IT BACK. >> PROJECT ALPHA? >> YES. THAT MIGHT BE OUR ONLY OPTION. >> WHAT IS PROJECT ALPHA? >> THE FIRST HOLOGRAM WE EVER CREATED TO APPEAR ONSTAGE. IT WAS A PROTOTYPE, BUT PERHAPS THE BEST THING TO STOP A HOLOGRAM... >> IS ANOTHER HOLOGRAM. BRING UP PROJECT ALPHA. >> SIR, ARE YOU SURE THAT WE WANT TO -- >> BRING IT UP. [ KEYBOARD CLACKING ] [ HOLOGRAM BLOOPS ] >> WHAT IS THAT? >> TUPAC. >> TUPAC. YO. THE HOLOGRAM OF MICHAEL JACKSON IS ON THE LOOSE. WE NEED YOU TO...TAKE CARE OF THE SITUATION. [ GUN COCKS ] >> GODSPEED, TUPAC. [ TIRES SCREECH ] >> OH, MY GOSH, HONEY! LOOK, IT'S TUPAC! I TOLD YOU THEM HOMEYS DIDN'T CAP HIS ASS. [ TIRES SQUEAL ] OH, THIS IS GOING ON INSTAGRAM. >> HEY, HEY. HOW'S IT GOING,

BRAHS? THIS IS CartmanBra. CartmanBra! AND, UH, WE ARE -- IT LOOKS LIKE WE ARE AT THE BUS STOP NOW. YEP. THERE'S KYLE, STAN, AND KENNY LOOKING STUPID AS EVER. >> I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE HELL TO DO. THE WHOLE WORLD'S GONE CRAZY. >> TELL ME ABOUT IT. >> UH-OH. LOOKS LIKE KYLE'S TAKING ISSUE WITH SOMETHING AGAIN. KYLE'S GOT A PROBLEM! CartmanBra! >> YOU KNOW, YOU USED TO SIT IN THE LIVING ROOM WITH YOUR FRIENDS AND FAMILY AND THEY WERE THE ONES COMMENTING ON WHATEVER WAS ON TV. >> OH, GOD. >> DO YOU MIND? >> OH, LOOKS LIKE KYLE'S COMMENTING ON MY COMMENTER WINDOW, BRAHS. BE SURE TO COMMENT ON THAT. #kyle'sgettingfrustrated. >> DUDE! NOBODY WANTS TO HEAR YOU COMMENTING ON THINGS. >> OH, REALLY? 10,000 SUBSCRIBERS AND COUNTING, BRAH.

>> THANKS FOR SEEING ME. I'VE GOT MY SPEECH WRITTEN. I'M READY TO LET THE WORLD KNOW THE TRUTH. >> SIT DOWN, LORDE. I'M NOT INTERESTED IN BEING TALKED OUT OF ENDING THIS. IT'S THE RIGHT THING TO DO. >> DO YOU KNOW WHAT AN ARTIST IS NOW, LORDE? AN ARTIST IS A CONVERSATION PIECE, NOTHING MORE, LIKE A VASE OR A KITSCHY SIDE TABLE, JUST SOMETHING FOR PEOPLE TO COMMENT ON. THE OLD WAYS ARE DYING. WE'RE NOT MAKING MONEY OFF RECORDS. WE'RE MAKING MONEY OFF TWEETS, AND YOU'VE TAKEN IT TO A WHOLE NEW LEVEL. >> WELL, THAT'S A WORLD LORDE EVER WANTED TO BE A PART OF. >> ON THE CONTRARY, LORDE IS GOING ON THE JIMMY FALLON SHOW TONIGHT AND EXPOSING HER ASSHOLE FOR EVERYONE TO FREAK OUT ABOUT. >> I'LL DO NO SUCH THING. >> WHO SAID ANYTHING ABOUT YOU? [ CLICKS ] [ HOLOGRAM BLOOPS ] >> YOU CAN'T JUST REPLACE ARTISTS WITH HOLOGRAMS. WHO WILL MAKE THE CONTENT? >> TODAY, COMMENTARY IS THE CONTENT. AND YOU, I'M AFRAID, ARE...JUST IN THE WAY. [ BELL RINGS ]

>> OKAY, CHILDREN. LET'S TAKE OUR SEATS. BEFORE WE GET STARTED, KYLE HAS ASKED TO SAY A FEW WORDS. GO AHEAD, KYLE. >> WHAT IS HAPPENING TO OUR LIVING ROOMS? THERE IS A CRISIS IN AMERICA, AND -- >> LOOKS LIKE WE'RE IN THE SCHOOL NOW. CHECK OUT WENDY. SHE'S FLAT AS A PANCAKE. >> WHAT THE HELL IS THAT? >> IT'S CARTMAN'S STUPID ONLINE PERSONA. >> OH, MY DICK'S GETTING HARD AGAIN. IT'S PROTRUDING OUT MY PANTS! >> WHAT THE HELL? >> THIS IS THE WAY OF THE FUTURE, MR. GARRISON. >> IT'S TRUE! >> [ CHUCKLES ] THAT'S RIGHT. BUTTERS WILL BACK ME UP ON ANYTHING. HE'S SUCH A BITCH. >> [ CHUCKLES ] YEAH. >> THERE IS A CRISIS IN AMERICA AS FAMILIES GROW FURTHER AND FURTHER APART -- >> [ Mockingly ] THERE IS A CRISIS IN AMERICA, AND WE HAVE TO SAVE OUR LIVING ROOMS. OUR LIVING ROOMS ARE DYING. >> MR. GARRISON, WILL YOU MAKE HIM STOP? >> I DON'T -- I DON'T EVEN UNDERSTAND WHAT'S HAPPENING. >> THIS IS THE REASON WHY OUR LIVING ROOMS ARE DYING! >> THIS IS THE REASON OUR LIVING ROOMS ARE DYING! SO WE'VE GOT TO DO SOMETHING. >> ERIC CARTMAN'S COMMENTER WINDOW TO THE PRINCIPAL'S OFFICE, PLEASE. ERIC CARTMAN'S COMMENTER WINDOW TO THE PRINCIPAL'S OFFICE. >> WHAT THE HELL DID I DO? >> ERIC, I'VE HAD A LOT OF COMPLAINTS THAT YOUR ONLINE PERSONA IS BECOMING A DISTRACTION. >> WELL, THIS SUCKS. LOOKS LIKE I'M IN THE PRINCIPAL'S OFFICE FOR JUST COMMENTING ON THINGS. >> ERIC, I AM TALKING TO YOU. >> ADULTS SO DON'T GET WHAT'S COOL ANYMORE. >> SHARON, SHARON!