The title of Internet Crush of the Week for several Feministing crew members (no names, but they rhyme with Shmos and Shmoe) goes to this guy, who has taken a Madonna classic and turned it into pure gender theory geek gold, with a heavy dose of awesome, plus a sexy little wink at the beginning:

Lyrics – which are hilarious – below the jump.



I made it through the awfulness

Somehow I made it through

Didn’t know how fucked up it was

Until I fucked you

I was made to feel

Incomplete

Like sex could make

A piece of me go missing

But you made me think

Yeah you made me think

What can sex really do?

I’m not a virgin

Because virginity isn’t even real

Not a virgin

It’s just a heteropatriarchal construct

Designed to police how you feel

Gonna get all your consent, love

And give all mine too

There’s no reason to “save” our bodies

By denying what we want to do

We won’t lose

If we choose

That something new

I want to do with you

Our bodies are our own

Our bodies are our own

And that’s always true

I’m not a virgin

Virginity is pretty much arbitrary

Not a virgin

It gets used to justify violence

And that’s really scary

Yeah that’s really scary

Violence is the worst

Really, really bad

We won’t lose

If we choose

That something new

I want to do with you

It doesn’t need ending

And it doesn’t need defending

Virginity isn’t even a thing

We’re not virgins

There’s no virginity to steal

We’re not virgins

It creates a hierarchy of sex acts

Where only the top one is “real”

We’re not virgins

Oh, we’re not virgins

It feels so fine to say

Virginity

Is such bullshit

Oh yeah, we’re not virgins

Oh oh oh, we’re not virgins