John Oliver & Andy Zaltzman

Erm... It's about the world... I think you'd better sit down.

What is your show all about?

AZ: The World and related issues. It’s a broad brief. Essentially, we’ll be fixing all the problems in the World today. This show heralds the beginning of a new utopian age for the human race as a whole.

JO: It’s a big claim, yes, but a claim nonetheless.

Where and when can we see it?

JO: The Pleasance in Edinburgh, at 8.20pm, August 4th to 30th, except 17th. If you can't see it there, then you can see it in the eyes of every new-born child.

AZ: If you can't see it there, make an appointment to meet us for a coffee sometime after that, and we'll talk you through it.

Do you love Edinburgh or is it a chore?

AZ: I think it would be petulant to describe doing the thing you love most for one hour a day at the world's biggest comedy festival as "a chore". I love it. I hope, one day, it can learn to love me too.

JO: Edinburgh has become, for me, the point of doing stand-up. The 'circuit' is disintegrating into a series of chain clubs that are increasingly full of comedians linguistically disgracing themselves with the cheapest, laziest form of comedy imaginable. Edinburgh is full of people making an effort, trying to do something that they're proud of. It is a fantastic place.

AZ: Nice point, well made. That should free up our autumn schedule.

What will you be doing with the other 23 hrs of the day?

JO: I will assign around 8 of those hours for sleep. I'll try and eat three times, spaced out in the time remaining. I will insult my flatmate for a further 3 of those hours. And I will think about sport for the rest of the time.

AZ: Table tennis.

What's the best thing you've ever seen on the fringe?

AZ: A goal I scored on the Meadows last year. I had the ball a good 20 yards from goal. Goalkeeper Patrick Monahan shouted: "Go on, Zaltzman, have a crack." Milliseconds later, the ball was careering past him at an incredible speed. I received a written apology from young Patrick, a promising comedian but a foolhardy goalkeeper. Other than that, I’d probably go for Robert Newman's 2000 show.

JO: On the last night of Late and Live in its previous venue, before it went a bit shit, Johnny Vegas transcended comedy. That was pretty good. Also, I have really enjoyed Tommy Tiernan, Dan Antopolski, David O'Dochety, Peepolykus, and Stewart Lee. I think that my favourite show of last year was Rob Rouse's.

What's the worst thing you've seen?

JO: Part of the problem of loving stand-up so much, is that the stuff you don't like you hate. And I hate some stand-up very deeply. And though I'm polite enough not to write it in a questionnaire, I will be more than happy to tell you on a one-to-one basis if you really want to know. Outside of comedy, I saw a musical last year about a reality-TV show which was unforgivable. It may have been the worst thing that I have seen in any medium.

AZ: A sketch show a few years ago. I forget its name. I was almost shaking with disgust by the end. And my own open mic spot at the old Fringe Club in 1997. It was my first proper gig. Having analysed the performance and the audience reaction, I did not do stand-up again for 18 months.

What's the most curious thing that's happened to you in Edinburgh?

AZ: Being heckled 12 months after a gig. I was walking through the Pleasance Courtyard in 2002 when I heard a man saying: "Oi, Zaltzman."” In accordance with my training, I turned to see who it was. I'd never seen the man before. "Yes?" I replied. He said confidently: "I saw your show last year, and, to be honest, I didn't think it was up to much. Bye." He thus contravened one of the basic rules of heckling, that any official heckle must be delivered within three months, otherwise it merely becomes a gratuitous insult.

JO: Three years ago, I played against Stenhousemuir, the Scottish Second Division side, in a team of comedians. We were beaten 11-2. It was the single greatest day of my life. Playing in a proper football ground, getting abuse from spectators when taking a corner... it was all I ever wanted. For our second goal, right at the end of the game, I persuaded one of their players that it would be funny if he scored for us. I put in a beautiful corner, put it right on his head, and he powered it into the top corner. His team-mates were a mixture of confusion and anger. That was 'curious'.

If you could persuade one VIP to come to your show who would it be? Why?

JO: I'd like Stephen Fry to come. If he did, I'd also like not to know that he was coming, and never know that he'd ever been. That would be nice.

AZ: Most of those who style themselves as VIPs are in fact merely IPs or, mostly, Ps. So, for a genuine VIP, I'd have to go for Tony Blair. This is not for any political purpose, but rather for the triumph of persuading him to do anything.

If the Edinburgh fairy could grant your wish, what would your wish for?

AZ: A head like an orange.

JO: A head like an orange.

What advice do you have for first time Edinburgh punters?

AZ: Never, ever, take any notice of reviews. Avoid musicals. Wonder where all the money goes. Go and see acts you've never heard of. And do not, under any circumstances, forget to see John Oliver & Andy Zaltzman's magnificent show, Erm… It's About The World… I Think You'd Better Sit Down.

JO: I've never been to Edinburgh as a punter, so to be honest, I've got nothing for you. I have nothing in common with genuine audience members. I cannot imagine being up there and not performing. If it ever happens, I think that I'm going to find it quite difficult. So, my main piece of advice for Edinburgh punters is to put on a stand-up show, so that they may benefit from my expertise.