Robot Entertainment’s Orcs Must Die! seemed like it was on the verge of dying for good. A franchise at the end of its life. However, Robot’s popular indie title actually isn’t at the end of its lifespan, and it was given a new lease on digital life thanks to… Google.

Orcs Must Die! 3 was announced as an exclusive for Google’s Stadia, but it was a report on MSN that revealed that it wasn’t quite true that Orcs Must Die! 3 was a Google Stadia exclusive. It turns out that it’s actually a timed exclusive, just like an Epic Games Store timed exclusive.

This was revealed by Robot Entertainment’s CEO, Patrick Hudson, who made a post over on the Orcs Must Die! sub-reddit on August 20th, 2019, where he explained…

“After shutting down OMDU, Robot had to downsize our studio. We had re-sized and focused on making smaller games than an OMD game. We didn’t know when or if we would get back to the OMD franchise. “We met with Google to learn more about Stadia for our other projects. We discovered that the people at Google are big fans of OMD. That led to an exploration of what might be possible with an OMD game on Stadia. We both got excited about our ideas and decided to go after it. “OMD3 would not be possible today without Google’s support. They are behind the game in a big way. We’ve hired more developers to bring it to life. It’s the OMD game that fans of the first two games have been wanting, and we’re thrilled that we have the opportunity to make it. “When OMD3 releases in spring 2020, it will be a timed exclusive on Stadia. We’ll say more about other platforms in the future.”

The announcement trailer was not met with the most positive feedback when people found out that it was going to be a timed exclusive on Google’s Stadia. In fact, it was worse than games announced as Epic Games Store exclusives.

For those of you out of the loop, the reason people hate the Stadia is because it requires an always-on connection; you don’t own any of the games you have to buy; the service has a limited lifespan; there won’t be any sexy-time or adult games available on Stadia; and you could find yourself locked out of your games because Google thinks you’re “toxic”. And that’s not even including all the other corrupt things that Google has done recently.

Also, I have no idea why people are more concerned about the Stadia exclusivity than the fact that the characters have been… “diversified”.

The hot chick from the previous games has been replaced with a tomboy who looks like a miniature Sudan-tanned version of Alexandria-Ocasio-Cortez, while her afro-wearing partner appears to be a mixture of Jim Kelly and Gary Coleman.

Now for those of you who don’t remember, take note of who you used to be able to play in Orcs Must Die! 2: a buff heroic white guy and a sexy mage with big boobs, long legs and plenty of opportunities to witness upskirt shots.

However, Orcs Must Die! 2 came out back in 2012, during a time when female sex-appeal wasn’t completely eradicated from Western gaming.

Basically, strong, straight white males and sexy females are out of the equation.

Anyway, signing a deal with the devil doesn’t usually pay off for studios in the long run. There’s the fact that the reputation goes straight down the toilet, and then there’s the uncomfortable reality where once the corporate buoy drifts away the studio is left to fend for themselves in the ocean, and the inevitable is that they either sink or get bought out.

I don’t really see how this ends well for Robot Entertainment, even once the timed exclusivity with Google runs out. And forfeiting the old characters from Orcs Must Die! to chase after the phantom audience with characters no one cares about is the perfect way to further erase any interest most core gamers would have had in the series.

But oh well, some companies have to learn the hard way about getting woke and going broke.

(Thanks for the news tip WhiteGuitarBoy)