I have been living in a two bedroom apartment with my wife and three kids for almost three years now. As fun as that sounds it can get kinda cramped. Our kids are continually growing but surprisingly our home is not getting any bigger.

Two bedrooms split between five people can feel a little claustrophobic at times. With twin 3-year-old boys and an eight-year-old daughter, we know this size apartment isn’t a permanent solution, but it works for now.

It’s the storage that makes it hard. Having a place to put things is challenging. It makes us be more picky about what we own and what we keep. Marie Kondo would be proud of our ability to maintain order in such a small place.

Apartments don’t have white picket fences.

Apartment living has its challenges, but I think that the biggest issue is the mental battle. Culturally I live in a city that is built on the system that sees apartment living as a temporary solution to owning a home. It is seen as a lesser way of living.

It is hard to not get sucked into this way of thinking and start to criticize myself for our living situation. I mean, let's be honest, you probably judged me a little reading the title. Either that or you felt some shame because you could relate. Don’t worry, it’s just how we have been taught to think.

My misguided cultural expectations.

I guess I thought I would outgrow it. Like at some point, I would be too old to live in an apartment, or that I would be making enough money to live at the end of a cul-de-sac in a middle-class housing development somewhere. But, I think that I misjudged the American economy and perhaps myself.

American culture tells me that I should have a house by now. It is recommended that you purchase a home between the ages of 25–34. Well, I am 34 and will not be buying a home this year. In fact, I will likely live in my two bedroom apartment for several more years.

I will probably never own a home and I’m okay with that.

There is so much that goes into owning a home and I don’t believe that my lifestyle fits well with homeownership. For most of the population owning a home is almost impossible without sacrificing more than you gain. To own a home today, I would have to work three jobs and never see my family. I would have to sacrifice happiness for a cultural dream.

Many people aspire to own a home. For some, it is a sign of financial and personal freedom from renting and owing to the “man”. But for me, it just feels like I would be owing to a bank instead.

Apartment living comes with some great perks.

Free home repair. I never have to repair or replace my appliances. I always have a handyman available, free of charge, to take care of all my home repair issues.

Pool and gym access. My apartment complex comes with a pool and 24-hour gym. I don't pay extra for access to them. I can workout and swim on my own schedule without getting in my car.

Location. Living in an apartment means that I have prime access to shopping and entertainment. There is a reason apartment complexes are built near shopping centers. They attract people like me. Living in the middle of housing development would only pull me farther away from the things I need to live my life.

Cost. I realize the claim that owning is cheaper in the long run and sets you up for a better retirement, but generally, this is a decades-old argument. Taxes, homeowners associations, repairs and utility fees are just a few of the extra costs that home-owning incurs. Instead of paying for those things, I can save that money for my retirement.

In the end, it’s a lifestyle choice.

If you own a house, please don’t feel the need to defend yourself against me. Please know that my reasons are also underlaid with a lifestyle choice.

To me, homeownership is about putting down roots in one place and in past culture, this made sense. However, today we rarely live in one place forever. I want to be free to travel and enjoy my life without the constant cost of upkeep on a slowly deteriorating house.

Someday my kids are going to grow up and start a family. They are going to live somewhere where they can find work and live a good life. I don’t want to be tied down to a house somewhere just because I own it. I want to be free to live close to my kids and grandkids.

Where you live is a lifestyle choice and for me, I want to spend less time in a house and more time with the people that matter to me.

Apartment living is challenging at times, but so is every form of maintaining a home. It about what you make of it not what others think of it. Live your best life and don’t let your home dictate that.