Will on Marion

What were you hoping for?

Only the love of my life.

First impressions?

Power coat! Chic or intimidating?

What did you talk about?

The pain of realising your school wasn’t in a John Hughes film, Ryan Gosling, working in retail, how expensive London is.

Any awkward moments?

I tried to incorporate the table into our initial handshake/half-hug/air-kiss hello, but she was very forgiving.

Good table manners?

Oh, impeccable.

Best thing about Marion?

She has a good line in cocked eyebrows, mainly in bemusement at my floundering.

Would you introduce her to your friends?

They’d find her charming.

Describe her in three words

Sardonic, self-effacing, right-on.

What do you think she made of you?

Slightly nervous, but (hopefully not too) garrulous?

Did you go on somewhere?

Yeah, to a pub down the road. I got a bit pissed.

And... did you kiss?

A little bit, yeah.

If you could change one thing about the evening, what would it be?

I had to run to another pub, because the loos were full. I think she thought I was legging it. So, yeah, not that.

Marks out of 10?

8.

Would you meet again?

It’s up to her.

Marion on Will

What were you hoping for?

A good story to tell my coupled-up friends.

First impressions?

He doesn’t take himself too seriously. Nice glasses.

What did you talk about?

Being nerdy kids in crappy comp schools, Ryan Gosling.

Any awkward moments?

I said his shirt made him look like an ice-cream man, which I meant as a compliment.

Good table manners?

Excellent. I admired his enthusiasm for the aïoli.

Best thing about Will?

His sense of humour and easygoing nature.

Would you introduce him to your friends?

Yes.

Describe him in three words

Just my type.

What do you think he made of you?

A massive nerd who laughs too much at her own jokes.

Did you go on somewhere?

To an old-man pub.

And... did you kiss?

What happens on a blind date stays on a blind date.

If you could change one thing about the evening, what would it be?

We’d have had two desserts.

Marks out of 10?

A solid 8.

Would you meet again?

Hopefully we can watch a film sometime.

• Will and Marion ate at Balls & Company, London W1.

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