STATEN ISLAND, N.Y. -- You've spent weeks trading pings -- and increasingly intense heart pangs. Turns out you have so much in common, from a soft spot for corny Yacht Rock to an insatiable craving for funky Korean food.

Could this be an online match made in New York City heaven?

And then the moment of truth: "I'm from Staten Island."

Digital crickets: "Oh" -- and then, just like that delicate egg yolk on top of your Bibimbap takeout, you're busted.

How did this rom-com become a rom-con?

Well, a totally unscientific SILive survey of dozens of borough daters outed a shady unwritten rule of online dating and mobile hookup apps: It doesn't matter if you're seeking something long-term or just a wham-bam -- Staten Island is a big turn-off.

Raul Barquet, 27, of West Brighton.

"There's literally been too many stories to isolate any one in particular -- but a common reaction is: 'Staten Island? Oh, that's far,'" says Raul Barquet, 27, of West Brighton.

"I don't even attempt to get people to come here for a date," says the sharp-dressed artist and former pro-wrestler, scratching his well-groomed facial scruff. "I've been off-and-on dating apps for years and no one has ever come to the Island."

Apparently, with 8.5 million fish in the C-I-T-Y, requiring potential lovers to take mass transit is the ultimate deal breaker.

"[If] your date is willing to travel to these boroughs to see you, he or she is probably a keeper," bemoans SpoiledNYC's Sara Sherr, author of 10 Ugly Truths You Need to Know about the Dating Scene in NYC.

"I know, it's depressing that our standards have sunk so low that suddenly being willing to travel for a half-hour on the subway has become the epitome of chivalry."

BTW: Sherr refers to the proverbial fifth borough as "Long Island" in her guide.

Sigh. Forgotten again.

STATEN SCHADENFREUDE? Stapletonite Joey Patches noticed he wasn't getting any responses on OKCupid, well, unless he "explicitly" suggested meeting up in Manhattan. A fun-loving guy with that popular "hot nerd" look and no bites. What gives?

Joey Patches shows off the NYPL's Book Cycle at the Stapleton Library table during the Fourth Annual Community Fair at Tappen Park. (Staten Island Advance/Ryan Lavis)

That's when he concocted a little social experiment.

"I expanded my radius so that I'd get more responses, and I started to find a few girlfriends who lived on Staten Island showing up suddenly," says the 30-year-old Public Library info assistant. "Because they had already fought this stigma -- and changed their zip code to a Manhattan one."

After learning how to game the system, Patches actually had the chance to open one lucky gal's eyes to the beauties of his borough.

"The one person I met who I went on a few dates with sort of took the opposite approach," Patches says. "After coming over once to Staten Island, she didn't want to meet up in Manhattan anymore. She practically fetishized the Island and the 'cute, cheap apartments.'"

And one random note of post-Superstorm sweetness: "Every single person, without exception, that I went on one date with through OKCupid sent me a text after [Hurricane] Sandy to see if I was OK."

GETTING GHOSTED ISN'T SO BAD: The jilted seem surprisingly upbeat about being blacklisted. Yes, "on paper" it looks bad, but Barquet says he can't really blame them for swiping left.

"Online dating is interesting, it's super noncommittal so I've had plenty of dates just not show up to a first date because if they haven't met you yet, you're not real to them," he says, sighing. "So I would never expect someone to travel 1.5-hours-plus on public transportation to come to where I am. Unless of course we had been dating for a while already."

Alexis Zayfert, who grew up in New Springville and Lighthouse Hill, got sick of playing a one-sided game.

St. George resident Marguerite Maria Rivas, 60, aka the "Poet Laureate of Staten Island." (Photo by Willie Chu)

"To get someone to come to Staten Island was asking them to travel via bus, train, boat, or all three to get there," says the 26-year-old media planner for an ad agency. "And once someone makes it out to Staten Island, it is really hard to decide where to go. A lot of bars/taverns skew for an older crowd."

Tired of hearing online dates whine about "time consuming" public transportation, she relocated to the growing enclave of cool that is Hoboken, N.J.

Did Hoboken fix what was broken?

"Definitely. The crowd is younger, millennial; with lots of bars and easy access to Manhattan. I think the Island overall is just a little inaccessible for young people."

SOME COME BACK FOR MORE: Alas, patience can pay off for the adventurous spirit, just ask Marguerite Maria Rivas: "A felon who wants to be buried with WiFi 'cause 'You never know,' a Libertarian Satanist, and a dashing globetrotting photojournalist walk into a bar -- on S.I. One came back. I've got stories."

No doubt, out of all the folks we spoke to for this impromptu study, this youthful 60-year-old -- a noted poet and college professor who lives within walking distance of the ferry -- has the best track record of success.

"Consider the suitors, though: The Libertarian Satanist wore a seersucker suit and carried a goats-head walking stick," says Rivas, letting out a wry chuckle. "I mean, c'mon. Why wouldn't such a guy like SINY?"

But what about the one who came back for more?

"My returning fella makes my heart skip a beat now and again," she says with a toss of her blonde beachy waves. "When he's on parole. Only kidding. When he's released from Hell -- kidding. When he's on assignment or feels like cooking for me. True story."

FOR THE HOMETOWN RECORD ...

Statpleton's Joey Patches and fellow Staten Islander Kristin Leyko jumped into love four years ago. The duo even makes music together: Check out their collab on the "Forgotten Borough: Forgotten Sounds Vo. 2" compilation. (Photo by Kristopher Johnson)

No one interviewed for this story is against dating people who actually grew up or moved here. It's just hard to find an online match, period, so dipping outside the general S.I. population is often a must.

We asked Alexis if she would ever commute back to the borough that used to be used against her. After a brief pause:

"If it were the right person. Being a Staten Islander, I am not turned off by other Staten Islanders. If we share common interests and click, that's the most important part. It might be inconvenient between Staten Island and Hoboken, but if the relationship is worth it -- there would be ways to make it work."

Oh, and Joey eventually did meet his "longterm girlfriend" here. They've been happily dating for four years now -- and they cross-referenced each others' OKCupid pages before their first date. (Update: They just got married)

Gee, maybe sometimes home really is where the heart is.

HAVE YOUR SAY: What's your experience with digital dating as a Staten Islander? Sound off in the comments below.