Apple CEO Tim Cook today published an open letter to customers, passive aggressively attacking Google’s business model without ever mentioning the company’s name. This led some sites to sensationalize Cook’s rant as a heroic piece of literature that single handedly “ripped apart Google’s business model in 2 paragraphs.”

That’s funny, because it only takes 2 paragraphs to flip all of that upside down.

Dear Tim Cook, I appreciate your company’s strong stance on protecting customer privacy. I strongly agree that Apple is an industry leader in privacy. After all, recent product launches prove this is true: Apple knows absolutely nothing about its customers. And from what I’ve seen, neither does Siri. What pioneering bravery it took to ignore consumer demand – despite an overwhelming amount of data – and insist on launching small screened iPhones until privacy breaching company’s like Google and Samsung exploited this information. What principle it took to release the Apple Watch with a rectangular face, while Google excavated consumer’s deepest desires for optional round-faced smart watches. Keep up the good work and fight the good fight! #IgnoranceIsBliss Love,

Phandroid PS: thanks for the leaked celebrity pics!

This comes on the heels of a new Google patent that tracks and identifies everyone in a room. The privacy doomers and gloomers will have their field day, but if Google responsibly integrates these types of ideas into their products and services, they’ll continue to outpace Apple in growth and innovation. How much smarter can Siri get if it doesn’t know who the heck you are?

I truly am an Apple fan, by the way: I’m typing this on Macbook Pro. I think the world is going to massively enjoy the iPhone 6 and 6 Plus. I’m excited for the implications that Apple Pay may have on NFC and mobile payments as a whole and believe that Apple Watch will help bring wearables mainstream.

That being said, Apple has a Jobs-based mentality of saying “screw what the consumer wants… we’ll make what they don’t know they want yet.” I fear this sentiment echoes in Apple’s hallways, without the ability to be fulfilled in Steve Jobs wake. Move on, Apple… responsibly collecting consumer data is the key to creating the most successful products you can.

UPDATE: I found this in last week’s edition of the Washington Post