It might be a no brainer given what we know about SAD, that alcohol being a natural social lubricant is completely abused by those with the condition.

Once again the advice. It is time to think holistically. Drinking will definitely lower your social inhibitions, but at the same time if you’re a problematic drinker you also induce other unwanted nasties.

So let’s look at 2 scenarios:

Good Paul

Paul is a recovering problematic drinker. He has decided that instead of drinking, he will go to gym and work on his body. He will start developing a positive outlook towards life. He will look at all aspects of his life and give them deserved consideration.

When Paul goes out, he is sober. He has a happy and confident countenance. Paul knows that every step he takes is another step in the right direction to the rest of his life. Because he is clear headed, with a degree of elevation he sums up situations, and is relatively nimble in social interactions. People like Paul and respect his principles. Women are genuinely attracted to Paul, and because Paul is taking a holistic approach to life, he is looking to attract not just any partner, but he’s put a great deal of thought into the type of girl that can make him happy. Paul has standards. He’s presentable and conscientious.

Paul has a night out and remains sober – he wakes up the next day and his mindset has not deserted him. He is not ashamed of who he is, and gains a +1.

Bad Paul

Bad Paul is also a recovering problematic drinker. No he’s not bad like a movie bad guy. He’s tried very hard to quit his problematic drinking. He’s even come to learn that he needs to solve the root causes of drinking. He’s made remarkable progress. Bad Paul goes out and gets swayed into having some drinks. He rationalizes this with “One or 2 wouldn’t hurt”. His mind becomes a bit of a blur, but he’s feeling confident, he talks to various people. As the night goes on he has a few more, and then a few more, while he is sitting chatting up a girl. At first she had his attention. Now his mouth has let him down. She leaves. Bad Paul isn’t completely aware of the problem, and finds a new girl to talk to. Her first impression is that Bad Paul must be a bit of a lost soul or drunk. She tolerates some talk, and then too leaves. Bad Paul resides to have a few more drinks in isolation (best case scenario) or decides to find a group of people and annoy the crap out of them before he is asked to leave or before he gets into a fight. Bad Paul stumbles home, wakes up the next day with a massive feeling of guilt and shame. For 2 days he feels physically weak. He is resolute – no more drinking ever!

The reality is if you are a problematic drinker then you’re both Pauls. I am too. If we look at this situation, what is less obvious is that Good Paul being sober instinctively might have been chatting to the right type of girl. By exuding his confidence and control he’s expanded his social network, or made a contact. He might even have gotten laid. Bad Paul just added to his encyclopedia of Paul blunders.

Now to regain that confidence and self respect is going to take more time. Bad Paul just pissed all over the track milage he was building up. And he has nothing to show for it. In every single way he would have been better off as good Paul.