“We must consult our means rather than our wishes.”

–George Washington

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As we trudge on through life, from infancy to adulthood to retirement, it’s rather easy to slip into the hedonistic pursuits of modern-day consumerism. After all, the society at large does actively try its darnest to entice you to buy into a materialistic lifestyle. And superficially, it does seem only fair, and overwhelmingly beneficial to our collective sanity, that we spend the salary which we slogged our lives away for on things we deeply desire. At least, it always seems so until the credit card bills hit us like a wrecking ball.

For my wife and I, we encountered one heck of a demolition by this particular wrecking ball quite often in the first year of our dating. My wife and I were obscenely drunk on the mead of love – the heady rainbow-tinted drunken mist that stubbornly stuck around and obscured so much of our rationality. This mist, together with the euphoric rush associated with drawing a stable and ample (in comparison to a broke undergraduate, of course) salary from our first jobs, decimated what financial sensibilities we had and accounted for many regrettable splurges. In hindsight, though, this series of reflections on our wanton spending condensed, through trial and error (loads of errors, by the way), into a single money-management strategy that has not failed us. Yet.

Do you remember that sense of accomplishment and joy when you finally made a purchase that you deemed a steal?

We employ a strategy that we lovingly coined “R2D2”, an acronym for Rest 2 Days Too. The use of an acronym is incredibly redundant (which couple doesn’t have quirks? And it refers to an adorable Star Wars android to boot!), and more importantly, stupidly simple. For the many times when we see something and think, “That’s exactly what I LOVED!” or “Seriously, I totally need that in my life!”, we would (share a conspiratorial look and) keep a mental note of that item, make an about turn and march out of the store. If, after two days of going about our lives normally, we still find that we constantly think about and desire that item, we would purchase it. Otherwise, we move on to other (more pressing) matters in our lives.

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This is our method to curb the habit of impulse-spending, and to sabotage the various psychological conditioning and tricks that boutique stores employ to cue us in on their “fire sales” and “incredible discounts”. Do you remember that sense of accomplishment and joy when you finally made a purchase that you deemed a steal? Well, you are not alone! Many others have experienced that same rush of euphoria when they snag an item at a seemingly fantastic discount. This rush creates a cycle of psychological systemic rewards and ensures a sustained flow of repeat customers who are addicted to this lifestyle consumption. Scary, huh?

We love R2D2 (strategy, not android) because it helps to remind us that managing our spending habits is a team effort – and the concept and application is so simple and tension-free. Nobody has to play the financial disciplinarian to remind each other of the sensibility in purchasing an item. Furthermore, it does allow us the flexibility to indulge when we truly want to (when she wants that gorgeous pair of YSL flats, or when I just want to cradle that sleek Chromebook in my paws).

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Of course, R2D2 is effective for us only because prior to applying it in our lives, we have discussed and reached a compromise on how we should approach purchasing big-ticket items (the definition of which has to be agreed upon together as well). We also have to agree on the maximum dollar amount that we can splurge on per month. This stage of discussion and compromising took a while to sort out, since the two of us came from financial management ideals that were polar opposites (I’m a saver, she’s a spender). What also aided our discussion immensely was the guidance from the underlying principles of a lifestyle steeped in minimalism. Once the discussion is completed, the application of R2D2 was pretty much a behavioural routine and therefore, automated.

The core principles of minimalism living, by Joshua Becker, helped us massively. He is a writer who has spent years conceptualising, applying and testing his advice on his life. His mantra to help others to live more by owning less is really quite inspiring. If you are interested in finding out more, do check his bestselling book, The More of Less, on Amazon.

In summary, R2D2 provides us some benefits that we really dig so far:

Save some SERIOUS dough for the things we truly enjoy indulging in. A keener awareness of our wants and needs. Being much more financially savvy (in comparison to the past, that is). Less stress from a lack of blaming-shaming-denying (“No. You don’t need that. Let’s go home”). No guilt from the purchases that we indulge in since we would utilise the heck out it. Less clutter from the inevitable “Eww. Did I really buy that? Gross. Not going to use it. Ever. See you in the abyss (storeroom)”. Purchases we make eventually tend to be of a certain quality – “More is not better. Better is better.” No more pangs of anxiety/ jealousy from failing to keep up with the Joneses.

Do you employ a similar method to help with your partner’s and your spending habits? Or do you employ other approaches? Do share your thoughts and experiences in the comments! After all, your sharing may be just the answer to the better life that everybody has been searching for all along!

This article originally appeared on Dan Koh’s Blog

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