Hello if you need any help finding anything let me know... Actually just let me help you with your sex shop needs!

I am so bored behind the counter I need some excersize! Haha

So I know most guys want help finding stuff but are too shy to ask so I'll just help you!

What are you looking for? A fleshlight? Oh cool! They are over here and there are soooo many of them!

Yea... Let's see... This one is the normal one... Vagina at the end and the case around it is made to look like a flash light it even has a little cap! I don't know how many people would actually be fooled by this and think it's just a regular everyday flash light but ya'know whatever haha. (funny voice)"No mom that thing on my nightstand right next to the tissues, covered in lube and jizz it just a flashlight... yeahh and dont touch it haha." This one actually comes will some lube so that's cool. It's jerk off ready I suppose haha

Ok this one is ... A stamina trainer so it's tighter and it's got all of these little bumpies in it... See hahah. (silly movie announcer voice)"Do you blow your load too early? The patented bumpies in this pussy with help you stay thrusting for days!" I should really get a job writing tag lines hahaha it says it helps with premature ejaculation, performance anxiety, plus you will have the most intense orgasms of your life! Wow tall words! This was probably modeled after wonder woman's pussy or something hahah!

Ok so this next one is called the classic pink butt! You'll never guess what it looks like haha yea haha a cute little asshole... see! Ooo it feels nice Haha so this one is for the ass-men out there. So it's almost the same as the first one... lets go down the list (reading fast) ...super realistic ... Easy to clean... 10 inches long a 4 inch diameter haha Yeaaaa you'll fit haha if not you come back and I'll give you my number haha

Oh look at this ProTip: run under hot water for warm sensation haha warning do not use boiling water hah! thats so silly. hey we just wanted to let you know DONT burn your dick off haha dont stick it in a bottle of hot sauce either haha if you do.. you're gunna have a bad time.

There's this one that is like a mouth... Yea I wouldn't pick that one either haha well if I had a cock haha you know what I mean haha bc seriously I can't say that a mouth fleshlight would be anything like a real blowjob. Come'on they call it 'sucking' dick for a reason. Yea I know they say it has suction action or whatever but if there isnt tongue action haha It would require like a vacuumed robot tongued sex toy to replicate a true blowjob haha pew pew robot mouth. oh my god haha what if they built a blowjob robot it became self aware and turned evil? haha The Blowjopocalypse? All the men die of sperm loss... so sad haha wow sorry I got off topic haha back to helping the costumer with his self pleasuring needs!

The last ones are the porn star ones. So we got Tori black... And Angela white ... Yea she does has great tits I know right? haha mmmm and Jenna Haze. I think these would be ideal for POV porn. Ya'know find a nice first person view porn of fucking Jenna Haze and prop this bad boy up and go to town on it. haha havnt you ever wanted to be a porn star? haha

Anyways we also can order you a RealDoll. Its like a full size woman doll that you can do w/e you want with. I imagine it like fucking a dead person haha so if you're into that haha Ive never had anyone come in looking for one but Im sure it would be a super creepy dude (old man voice) "hey there young lady do you have any toys that will satisfy my necrophilia fetish? I'm really into lifeless eyes starring at me. Yes I tried the morgue and now they have a restraining order against me..."