"Church of England ordering artificial people to work as assistant curates isn't received well; sometimes it takes a child to see through the nonsense." Today's story is “No Peas In My Garden” by Dan Leinir Turthra Jensen, or just leinir, who can usually be found relaxing in the English Midlands, where they split their time between cooking usually delicious food, writing various bits of social realism and science fiction, or creating free and open source software in the KDE project. Sometimes all three happen at the same time, and they tell me that sci fi epic they’ve been working on the last most of a decade is getting closer to wrapping up. While waiting for that to land, if you would like more after this one, you can find more of their stories in the anthologies found on their GoodReads profile. This story in particular can be found in Arcana, and like all the stories in that anthology it is based on a card from the Major Arcana. In this case card number seventeen, The Star. Read for you by Khaki, your faithful fireside companion.