From Harvard to the University of Minnesota to San Diego State. Photo: Ann Singer, Boston University, class of 2017

To get a feel for national trends in college sex, we partnered with SurveyMonkey to survey students from diverse backgrounds at a wide range of four-year colleges and universities all over the country — from Harvard to the University of Minnesota to San Diego State. A couple of caveats: The poll was designed by journalists, not social scientists. So on the controversial question of sexual assault, we rather bluntly asked respondents whether they’d been raped, while most public-health surveys instead describe the act of forced sex in a number of different ways and over a series of questions.

Far more people will say that they’ve experienced rape if you don’t actually ask them to identify as rape survivors, so fewer students said they’ve been raped in our survey than have in recent national campus studies. (However, a high percentage of people in our survey said they know other students who have been sexually assaulted.) Also, despite our best efforts to get an even gender split, more women responded to the poll — it turns out that the difficulty of getting young men to sit still for a survey is a well-known problem.

There were a lot of things that interested us about the findings: College women, as a group, have a significant fear of sexual coercion; men, by contrast, overwhelmingly fear rejection — and are approximately twice as afraid of poor performance in bed as women are. But the thing that intrigued us most was that for all the narrative dominance of “hookup culture,” the students who replied to our survey were surprisingly sexually conservative.

Analysis by Amelia Thomson-Deveaux

Not interested in taking the poll? Skip down to the student sex life data ↓

How did your college sex life compare to that of the surveyed students? Are you male or female? Male Female When did you lose your virginity? 12-15 15-18 18-20 20-23 I'm a virgin What is a hookup? Sex Oral sex Making out Anything beyond kissing If you are not a virgin, how often do you have sex? Daily Several times a week Several times a month Several times a year Less than once a year Other Do you think you’re having more sex or less sex than your friends? More Less How long do you think you need to know someone before you have sex with them? Under a week 1-2 weeks 2 weeks to a month Longer than a month Other What is your biggest fear when it comes to dating and sex? Rejection Coercion Performance Other If you are not a virgin, have you ever felt that a sexual partner crossed a line? Yes No Have you ever been in love? Yes No See your results Submit Your results relative to the surveyed students and other New York Magazine readers are marked in orange. 1.) When did you lose your virginity? College Students NY Mag readers 100% 0% 6% 31% 20% 4% 39% 12-15 15-18 18-20 20-23 I'm a virgin 2.) What is a hookup? Sex...........................36% Oral sex......................13% Making out....................17% Anything beyond kissing.......34% Sex...........................0% Oral sex......................0% Making out....................0% Anything beyond kissing.......0% College Students NY Mag readers 3.) How often do you have sex? College Students NY Mag readers 100% 0% 4% 0% 27% 0% 35% 0% 18% 0% 8% 0% 8% 0% Daily Several times a week Several times a month Several times a year Less than once a year Other 4.) Do you think you’re having more sex or less sex than your friends? 32% 68% 0% 0% 5.) How long do you think you need to know someone before you have sex with them? Under a week 1-2 weeks 2 weeks to a month Longer than a month Other Non-virgins 17% 0% 10% 0% 17% 0% 37% 0% 19% 0% Virgins 3% 0% 5% 0% 10% 0% 55% 0% 27% 0% College Students NY Mag readers 6.) What is your biggest fear when it comes to dating and sex? Men Women College Students 100% 0% 47% 37% 6% 30% 30% 16% 17% 17% Rejection Coercion Performance Other NY Mag Readers 100% 0% 0% 0% 0% 0% 0% 0% 0% 0% Rejection Coercion Performance Other 7.) If you're sexually active, have you ever felt that a sexual partner crossed a line? Yes No Men 15% 0% 85% 0% Women 39% 0% 61% 0% 8.) Have you ever been in love? College Students NY Mag readers 100% 0% 87% 0% 13% 0% 48% 0% 52% 0% Yes (Nonvirgins) No (Nonvirgins) Yes (Virgins) No (Virgins)

Student survey responses Sex Nearly 40 percent of the students we surveyed said they are virgins. Still, most people thought everyone else was having tons of sex. Are you sexually active? Freshman/Sophomore 49% Yes 51% No Junior/Senior 57% Yes 43% No Women 59% Yes 41% No Men 51% Yes 49% No How long do you think you need to know someone before you have sex with them? Nonvirgins Virgins 100% 0% 17% 3% 10% 5% 17% 10% 37% 55% 19% 27% Under a week 1 to 2 weeks 2 weeks to a month Longer than a month Other How do you find sex partners? Through friends 53% Class/dorms/extracurriculars 47% Other 34% Bars/parties 21% Online 14% Do you use dating apps? Women 17% Men 27% How many sex partners do you think you should have before marriage? Women Men 100% 0% 19% 28% 53% 41% 17% 19% 8% 6% 1% 3% 2% 3% 0 1-5 5-10 10-20 20-30 Over 30 Risk Not surprisingly, more women than men report that a sexual partner has crossed the line, but almost as many men as women know someone who has been raped. Do you use birth control? 86% Yes ↓ Condoms 49% Pill 45% Other 12% IUD 8% Have you been raped? Yes → Women 12% Men 4% Do you know someone who has been raped? Yes → Women 54% Men 45% Do you think your school does a good job of handling rape reporting? Yes → Women 62% Men 80% How much do you typically drink on a night out? Freshman/Sophomore Junior/Senior 100% 0% 14% 22% 25% 32% 10% 7% 51% 39% 1-2 drinks 3-4 drinks More than 6 drinks I don't drink Love Relationships are not dead: 69 percent of respondents said they have had one that lasted longer than a year. And almost everyone plans to get married someday. What’s the longest relationship you’ve had? Nonvirgins 1% Under a month 12% 2 to 6 months 14% 6 months to a year 69% Longer than a year 4% Never been in a relationship Virgins 6% Under a month 14% 2 to 6 months 9% 6 months to a year 19% Longer than a year 52% Never been in a relationship What does a “date” mean to you? Dinner 21% Sex 1% Any one-on-one encounter with romantic potential 71% Other 7% Do you think you’ll get married someday? Yes 91% No 9%

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*This article appears in the October 19, 2015 issue of New York Magazine.