At 42 and stricken with cancer, Nicole Appleton's mother hired a funeral director, paid in full and gave very detailed instructions.

Key points: Funeral directors are not held accountable for behaviour due to a lack of regulation

Funeral directors are not held accountable for behaviour due to a lack of regulation There is little recourse for families traumatised by the treatment of their loved one's bodies

There is little recourse for families traumatised by the treatment of their loved one's bodies Grieving family were overcharged thousands of dollars and "hounded" for payment

She specifically wanted her hair straightened, her eyebrows waxed and her body be collected and handled by only women.

But from the moment Michelle Appleton died, there were problems.

A Four Corners investigation has found multiple families, including the Appletons, have been left traumatised by their experience with funeral companies, ranging from emotional suffering to over-charging.

Michelle Appleton had chosen White Dove Funeral Care in Dandenong South in Melbourne, as she thought they could provide an all-ladies service.

Her daughter, Nicole Appleton, was shocked when a man came to pick up her mother's body in the middle of the night.

"We had no choice but to just let him come in and take her, which is not what she wanted at all," she said.

Ms Appleton phoned the funeral home to organise a final viewing, but funeral director Ian Gibson told her that would not be possible.

"He said that her body was too bad to be viewed," she said.

"She looked a little bit sick, but it wasn't anything horrific that shouldn't have been able to be viewed. Straight away I've realised there's obviously something wrong as to why he's saying no."

Michelle Appleton planned her own funeral before she died of cancer. ( Supplied )

Alarmed, Ms Appleton called another funeral home, Gateway/Grant Funerals, to take her mother's body away from White Dove Funeral Care.

When they opened the coffin they were horrified.

"She was jammed into a coffin that was way too small to her. Her shoulders were … so high up near her ears. It's just not a normal position at all," she said.

"Her clothes were just thrown on top of her, her shoes weren't on her, her hair was a mess.

"She had saliva all down the side of her face, her eyes were black and sunken in.

"There was just so much stuff not right, and it didn't look anything like what she looked like," Ms Appleton said.

After Ms Appleton complained about Mr Gibson on social media, the funeral director claimed he had been defamed.

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The incident gained attention after he unsuccessfully tried to stop the cremation from going ahead, by seeking a court injunction, saying he needed the body as evidence.

Mr Gibson has been in the industry for nearly 30 years and insists he is a respectful operator.

Four Corners has seen photos of Michelle's body and a report from the embalmer at Gateway/Grant Funerals which both confirm Ms Appleton's account.

Mr Gibson denies there was any problem.

"She was no bigger than me and a standard coffin was the appropriate size," Mr Gibson told Four Corners.

"She wasn't that big and it wasn't that small," he said.

Mr Gibson walked out of his interview with Four Corners after being questioned about complaints.

Space to play or pause, M to mute, left and right arrows to seek, up and down arrows for volume. Watch Duration: 1 minute 14 seconds 1 m 14 s Funeral director Ian Gibson cuts short his interview with Four Corners.

Chief executive of the company that owns Gateway/Grant Funerals, Christian Maxwell, is worried about Mr Gibson still operating.

"It was pretty reprehensible," he said.

"He shouldn't be operating if [he's] not going to treat loved ones with respect and care. That's the problem in this industry, not enough people are held responsible for their actions," he said.

The Appleton family weren't the first people to be left distressed by Mr Gibson's behaviour.

Funeral director banned from church

In 2013, Mr Gibson was due to hold a funeral at a Catholic Church after the morning mass was over.

Grade five and prep students were in the process of leaving the church when the coffin had been brought in with the lid opened and the body inside.

The priest, Father Albert Yogarajah, said the children were traumatised after being exposed to the open coffin.

Father Albert Yogarajah had an altercation with Ian Gibson before a funeral. ( Four Corners )

When Father Albert asked Mr Gibson to close the coffin, the funeral director became aggressive.

"He opened his hands, blocked the entrance, and pushed me with his tummy," he said.

Mr Gibson pushed Father Albert three times, before the priest threatened to call the police.

Mr Gibson said he did nothing wrong and denies pushing Father Albert.

"His mass was well and truly finished, a family member rocked into the city at 3:00am and that family requested a viewing and we weren't to know that Father Albert would disallow a viewing in that church," he told Four Corners.

Father Albert banned Mr Gibson from doing any more funerals at his parish.

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Industry insiders call for change

Most of the people who died last year in Australia ended up in the hands of a funeral director, but there is little recourse for grieving families when things go wrong.

Michael Mackay from the NSW Funeral Directors Association said the industry needs more regulation.

Michael Mackay (r) from the NSW Funeral Directors Association said the industry needs more regulation. ( Four Corners )

"Our biggest concern is most of the public believe or think we're a regulated industry — we're not a regulated industry," he said.

"The role that we play in a community is a significant role and it's important that we get it right. It's important for the family, it's important … to know that the person they love and cared for is cared for in an appropriate way."

Grieving family 'hounded' for costs they did not agree to pay

The lack of price transparency in the funeral industry also leaves people who've lost a loved one vulnerable with few avenues to complain.

After Ali Stroud's 22-year-old son Tom was killed in a car accident in 2012, the family went to Le Pine Funerals, which is owned by Invocare, Australia's largest funeral provider.

Tom Edmonds died in a car accident in 2012. ( Supplied )

Tom's step-father Gavin said after selecting the coffin and service, they asked about the pricing and were advised they were within their $10,000 budget.

They were shocked two months later when Le Pine sent through a bill showing they had gone $4,700 over their budget.

Mr Stroud tried to dispute the bill, but the company sent the account to its debt collection agency and repeatedly contacted the family for payment.

"When they couldn't get past me … they actually targeted Daniel, Tom's father, because he put his name on the paperwork so they omitted me from the process and then just went after, they hounded him," he said.

Gavin and Ali Stroud disputed a bill showing they had gone $4,700 over budget for their 22-year-old sons funeral. ( ABC News: Patrick Rocca )

Unbeknown to Mr Stroud, his wife Ali was so upset she paid off the bill over a year.

"She just didn't want to be seen not paying for her son's funeral," he said.

"There was nothing I could do about it because once you pay, that's it. That's too bad. There's nowhere to complain to," he said.

After Four Corners raised the Strouds' case with Invocare, chief executive Martin Earp apologised for failing to tell the family they had gone over their budget.

"Despite the fact that we have policies and procedures in place, we are a business that has over 1,800 people within it. When you deal with people, unfortunately, from time-to-time, people will make mistakes and in this case there was a mistake made," said Mr Earp.

Seven years on, the family is still traumatised by the experience.

"I think this would've happened many times [in the industry] and being a taboo subject [people], would've just quietly borne it and tried to move on," Mr Stroud said.

"It doesn't make it right."

Funeral home owner Michael Cox said there is little oversight of the industry. ( Four Corners )

Funeral home owner Michael Cox urged consumers to ask their funeral director questions and take time choosing the right provider.

"If at any stage you doubt or you think, 'oh, it just doesn't feel right,' your intuition's normally always right," he said.

"If it doesn't feel right from the beginning, it's certainly not going to feel right at the end."