The Original David Bowie's Area Webpage









This webpage contains several images of David Bowie's bulging genitals covered by nothing more than tights stretched to their breaking point and therefore should not be viewed by anyone who could be offended by David Bowie's Area protruding gratuitously all over the place. If you're offended by enormous and ubiquitous packages you probably shouldn't have come here in the first place. What were you thinking? Bowie's Area... More pervy humor:





Don't act so shocked. You clicked on "crotch," so you're not fooling anyone. Pervert. David Bowie's Area at a glance:

Early in 1997 Troll T. Trull, the grandfather of modern areaology, first came to the startling realization which was destined to reshape the way humanity viewed its universe: That David Bowie's Area is omnipresent; his Area exists at every point in every facet of reality. Those of us who witnessed this initial revelation immediately knew it was Truth, and soon became the first Areaologists.

AREA:

1. Length multiplied by Width

2. A portion of the body consisting of the genitalia, groin, and inner thighs

3. The part of David Bowie that is all-encomposing, and pre-dates the written word.

see also: region, crotch, domain, bulge, package, unit, zone, quadrant, contour map, midgard serpent, tent Once we had discovered that David Bowie's Area is all around us every moment of our lives and everywhere that we go, two primal urges filled us: To learn as much about David Bowie's Area and Its interactions with our known universe as we could, and: To share our profound and intimate knowledge of David Bowie's Area with as many new minds as possible. This pair of desires grew into The David Bowie's Area Webpage and The DBA Institute, irrespectively.

Judging by how many of the original team of Areaologist researchers were driven mad in those early days, we feared it might be dangerous to enlighten the general populace to the true nature of the universe of David Bowie's Area. However, it has always been our policy to let knowledge be available. It is better to know the Truth and fear it, than to fear the Knowing of Truth. Wait, is that it? know the fear and area the truth... Oh, nevermind. I still never get that part right. New to the DBA Webpage? Don't quite believe or understand yet? Check out the Beginner's Guide to David Bowie's Area.

Stopping back in hopes of finding more Bowie's Area goodness? Find out What's New?

Amazed that the DBA site has been updated after all this time? Find out What happened in the meantime?

It's Sunday morning and you need your Bowie fix? Apparently there's a Church now!

Think you've seen all there is to see here and ready to move on (or just flee in terror)? Of course we have a link page.