Let me explain you a thing, why "Connect the Hots" creep me out and NOT OKAY AT ALL

(Warning: This will get a bit personal, mentioned sexual assault, rape culture, rape)

Yes, I know I’ll probably get hate for this, there will be people telling me to shut up. I’ve actually decided I would not blog/reblog anything about Connect the Hots after my last post. But today? Today I watched that new VS video, and the minute Geoff and Gavin showed up on my screen, I wanted to turn the whole thing off. (I didn’t, because I still like AH and Ray vs. Jack is totally hilarious)

I swear, I swear I was going to drop this whole CTH mess and quietly leave the fandom (I’d still watch their videos, just not in the fandom).

But I made the mistakes of going into the tags, and read the comments on Geoff’s ‘apologies’ post, and I had read the original comments on the YT video.

Let me tell you why I’m not okay with this.

It’s not because they joked about it, it was because they are doing it. They weren’t talking about how they used to fool around and do stupid thing.

It was because there were comments such as “jeez, following them doesn’t mean we’ll going to rape them. Paranoid much?” and “you are responsible for protecting yourself” and “cut it out, staring is a compliment"

It was because when Michael told Gavin he was stalking girls, Gavin replied with looking at them made him feel good. And Barbara just said that was what straight men do.

It was because, before I even went to Kindergarten, my mom told me how she was followed on her way home when she was in high school, and had to hide in a convenient store. And told me to be careful.

It was because the first day I started kindergarten, my mom told me, when I need to go to the bathroom, always go with a friend. That way, when someone sneak into our school, one of us can run back and ask for help. (and apparently all the girls were told to do the same)

Not if. When.

It was when I was still five or six, my mom bought me this book about how girls should tell their parents and teachers if they were raped. It was a book designed for five or six years old girls. And inside it there was a story about how the girl’s uncle "touched” her inappropriately.

It was because when I was in high school, I had had people following me around on scooter, calling out “hey, do you want a ride, let’s go somewhere else.” and I was about fourteen.

It was because ever since I was old enough to go out with friends on my own, my mom, my dad, my aunts, told me never drink a drink that had been out of your sight even for one second.

It is because my aunts told me these stories about how they grew up in a rough neighborhood and had to take a different way to school everyday because taking the same route would make them easier target.

It was because when I was about thirteen or fourteen, there was a huge case about a group of people followed a high school girl, shoved her in a van, kidnapped her, killed her, mailed her mother a finger as a prove of life for ransom. And my mom would’t let me walk anywhere on my own for half a year.

It was because once when my friend and I walked our way to a restaurant back in high school, there was a guy who followed us, then walked right next to us and said “I really want to see your underwear.”

It was because my close friend once had someone followed her all the way onto the bus (which she took everyday to get home), touched her thighs, and came on her skirt.

It was because the Internet keep warning us, when we are alone in an elevator, and a guy walked in, we should hit the button to the next floor and get out quickly.

It is because a couple of years ago, a woman got home after a long day of work, and just about she was about to unlock her door, a man who had been follow her for days step out of the staircase he was hiding under, forced her with a knife and raped her in her bed.

It was because there was a shop on my way to work, and the clerks inside it catcalled every time I walked by. Sometimes with a “nice ass” or “come on, talk to us.” And I had to talk the long way home just to avoid that place.

It was because so, so many different things. I can go on and on. I can talk about the time I nearly got raped by one of my college buddies, who I knew since my freshman year, who I sat with when his girlfriend broke up with him, and made sure he got back to his dorm safely after he got so drunk.

Or I can talk about there is a thing going on in my country called “pick up the bodies.” Which is a bunch of guys waiting outside a club or a pub, pick up the girls who are so drunk they couldn’t walk, and take them to a motel and rape them. And how the general public’s opinion on this is that “well, women should be more careful.” or “God, women are such sluts.” some even said “well, I wouldn’t want to fuck that body, who knows how many men have picked her up before?”

Oh, and now we’re talking about picking up the bodies, let me tell you something. None of those men were charged with rape. None. There was even this one incident where the girl woke up when the man was in the shower, panicked, drove his car from the motel, and got sued for car theft by the man who raped her. The man won.

I can go on and on.

I’ll probably need a separate post if I want to talk about all the times some men just stare at my boobs on train, on bus, on MRT, on the road when I’m riding my bike.

And this? This is why I’m not okay with CTH.

This is why I’m not okay when Gavin said they would slow down the car next to the person they follow. This is why I’m not okay when Geoff said they made Gavin look like a creeper.