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Weighted blankets have skyrocketed in popularity, with enthusiastic users touting their health benefits, but they may not be right for everyone. The Onion looks at the pros and cons of using a weighted blanket.


PRO

Easier method of dealing with anxiety than actually confronting your issues.

Safest way to recreate calming sensation of being trapped beneath a pile of rubble.


Increased resistance helps improve your speed and strength when handling regular blankets.

More deadly than a standard blanket in a self-defense situation.

CON

Way heavier than a regular blanket.

Hard to fuck under there.

Doesn’t do much when you’re on top of it.

Telegraphs easily exploitable psychological weakness to spouse or partner.