Like an unemployed, alcoholic Piers Morgan curled in a foul smelling ball in the doorway to Poundstretcher, Blackpool are an entity you really should feel pity for (as you should seeing Piers in such a sorry state); but instead opt to seize the chance to deliver some opportunistic kicks to their head. Every club seems to sympathise with the appalling situation at Blackpool whilst also wanting to give them a thorough kicking on their inevitable way down.

The ownership situation at Blackpool is indeed dire; something we can empathise with having been through problems with Kenneth. What the Oyston family is doing to that club is a travesty and it’s no surprise that the fans have opted to stay away. I can’t fathom how anyone could believe the situation to be sustainable, but it seems that short-term gains are the name of the game for the Oystons who have opted to bleed the club dry. With only 22 points from 38 games before the game they’re a good 20 points from safety with only 21 points left to play for, so short of a miracle they are done for. Leeds strolled into sunny Blackpool chasing a 6th win in 7 games, hoping to give an already beaten team a further kicking.

In earnest though, the match didn’t matter for either side. Leeds aren’t reaching the playoffs and with 17 points between us and that last relegation spot it seems hard to believe that we’re going down (even if it is mathematically possible). Blackpool don’t have any points to make and were beyond saving even before the season started, whereas we were chasing little more than vanity points. Winning is a habit, though, and getting a ton of those under our belts at the end of the 2014/15 campaign normally means that the next season starts brightly. It’s partly why League One sides start well and Premiership relegated ones take a while to get going. So while the outcome doens’t strictly matter, we’re trying to get a running start for next season.

Team selection and bad decisions

The Blackpool pitch looks like it has been subject to artillery since Christmas; a bowling green it is not. Hell, you could lose a golf ball in some of those divets. It’s so poor I’m genuinely surprised that the Football League haven’t intervened, I’d be amazed if there’s another professional club in the 92 with a worse playing surface. It was with perhaps worrying naivety that Neil opted to name an unchanged side.

I don’t disagree with the rationale behind wanting to keep a squad together, but I looked at the sodden mess that constituted the pitch at Bloomfield Road and winced. I felt uncomfortable at putting Sam Byram, Lewis Cook, Alex Mowatt and Charlie Taylor in a game where injuries are likely. It was also unlikely that we’d be able to “play our way”, as Neil would put it. We try to play fluid passing football, which is fine on surfaces like at Craven Cottage midweek where the ball doesn’t roll at a right-angle to where you intended. Our style of play (and team selection) suits a football pitch rather than the emaciated, muddy, sandy mess that Blackpool suffer.

So while I like the squad Neil selected objectively, I don’t think the Bloomfield Swamp merited it (especially after a tiresome midweek game). I’d have rested people and mixed things up. I think this would have been a great opportunity to utilise whatever “Plan B” exists at Leeds. Namely, put Edgar Cani on the pitch and hit indelicate balls at his face and see if he can cut it. Add a dash of Steve Morison too. I’d have been tempted to play 4-2-2-2, if I’m honest, given how little it matters. Play Antenucci, Doukara, Cani and Morison up front (Cani and Doukara the front two, with Morison and Antenucci behind, rotating as they see fit). A pitch as poor as this negates midfield, so we might as well bypass them entirely and just loft balls towards the front-four. Why not? We’d either win 5-0 or lose, neither matters and we’d at least rest some key personnel.

I mean, look at the state of this pitch after the game:

Match performance

It’d be too easy to blame a poor playing surface for Leeds’ performance and I’m not going to. While it certainly played a factor the lacklustre way in which we approached the first half was inexcusable. Perhaps indicative of how much football this set of players has managed since the calandar ticked over to 2015, but Blackpool were by far the better team in the first half. It wouldn’t have been unfair to enter the dressing room at half time 2 goals down, testament to how unremarkable Leeds had been. Madine had caused us all sorts of trouble and deservedly grabbed a goal just before the break.

Neil persumably expressed a few choice emotions at half time but opted not to make any changes. Initially, that is. He had obviously shouted at the lads to play some actual football and when that didn’t manifest on the pitch substitutions were made only 8 minutes after the restart. Mowatt and Sharp were pulled (both entirely ineffectual) in favour of Morison and Antenucci. The game-plan started to come together a bit more as Leeds started to understand how to play to the conditions. 9 minutes later Antenucci continued this rich run of substitute-goalscoring as he caught out the Blackpool defense and demonstrated his impressive technique by lobbing both the keeper and two covering defenders. I doubt anyone else on our roster would have attempted the shot, let alone converted it. I like Mirco because he’s got such natural ability and with goals like this (and again midweek) he’s surely campaigning for inclusion to the starting 11.

Chasing a winner Leeds ramped up the pressure adding Doukara for Taylor but it never quite came. Well, it did, in that Bellusci made a marauding run into their box and deftly converted a cross with his head, only to have it rightly disallowed due to attempted murder in the build-up. You see, instead of moving like a human and running around an opposition player, Bellusci opted to run through him like the madman he is. So where we could have perhaps been celebrating a late winner, instead it was pulled back. It’s this self-destruct that typifies Leeds and I doubt I’d have us any other way, upsetting as it is.

In any other circumstance I’d commend Blackpool for the performance for nullifying one of the league’s form sides, but ultimately it’s bittersweet. They could have beaten Watford, Bournemouth and Norwich in a 270 minute Saturday afternoon marathon for all it mattered, they’re done for. Blackpool are relegated and merely pending the formality of it being mathematically certain. For Leeds it was a missed opportunity that won’t be keeping anyone up at night. The 2 additional points would have put us in 12th rather than 13th. Hardly the stuff Roy of the Rovers wrote about is it?

Normally I’d write about “key performers” but I can’t be bothered. Mirco Antenucci probably deserves column inches for cashing the proverbial cheques he’s been writing on Instagram, but it’s always difficult to get too excited when you just about draw against the worst side in the league. They had twice as many shots and were the better side. Humbling to write that against a team so utterly lacking in quality (both on and off the pitch), but this result will dissolve into the rich tapestry that is Lee Clark’s face when they are officially relegated.

I could summarise this as bluntly as “poor performance against poor opposition on a poor pitch” (where you can substitute “poor” with a suitable expletive) but that would perhaps not give Blackpool the credit they deserve. We rolled into town like cock of the walk, confident of battering the trembling Piers Morgan as he frantically tries to swig another mouthful of Special Brew, instead finding the hateful mess in surprisingly good form and settling for a few harsh words.

You see I’m dragging this Piers Morgan metaphor out as long as I physically can. Why? Because it’s Monday and there’s not enough football to talk about. We were poor, Blackpool were alright, but we’ll stay up and they’ll go down. Suck on that Lee Clark. It’s just a shame that Luke Varney isn’t at Blackpool. Or the bottom of the ocean.

On and on.