(I work in a coffee shop. I am on break in the lobby when a couple walks in. Directly behind them is a cute little boy in Batman costume.)

Me: “Oh, my God! It’s BATMAN!”

(The boy stops, strikes a pose, and starts looking around menacingly. After a few seconds, he approaches the counter.)

Mother: “Jeff, would you like a chocolate milk?”

Boy: “I am not Jeff. I am The Batman.”

Mother: “The Batman, would you like a chocolate milk?”

Boy: “Yes. Yes, The Batman would.”

(The couple pays while the boy sits down with his chocolate milk. He keeps a stern look on his face as he sips the drink.)

Boy: *sips* “Gotham is safe.”

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