Occam’s Razor is a principle of philosophy that suggests the simpler an explanation is the more likely it is. That’s all well and good unless you suffer from an over active imagination and are generally hopped up on more caffeine than is good for you. I ALWAYS drink more caffeine than is good for me. It’s what I do.

So either I have to go with the simpler explanation of today’s comic which would be that my metabolism simply slows down at night and I get cold….. OR the funner explanation is that every single night my wife waits till I fall asleep. Then she sheds her humanity to reveal the nightmare creature underneath.

Clearly my wife is some sort of thermal vampire who feeds on my body heat as I sleep. It’s the only explanation that makes sense to me.

I imagine the feeding begins as she starts to draw the raw life force from my body. Gradually my body cools as she feeds. She leaves me just enough every night to survive. She’s a considerate thermal vampire. You have to respect that.

The result of these nightly depredations is that every single morning regardless of the time of year I wake up with no body heat what-so-ever. In mortal agony I crawl out of bed to start my day. And this nightly feeding has continued for about thirteen years.

What can I do though? My wife may be a thermal vampire…. But she owns the boobies. There is no escape.