For the debut of the 2016 Cooper Clubman, Mini has conjured up a new identity that it hopes will extend across the brand and resonate with buyers: the cool uncle. The way Mini spins it, every family has one member that is unlike the others, a worldly type on the fringe who follows his own path and radiates an undeniable sense of distinction. Mini wants to be that uncle, and it’s starting with the Clubman.

To find out if the new four-door Clubman, the longest and widest Mini yet, is up to the task of performing cool-uncle duties, we snagged some seat time in a pair of freshly baked 2016 Cooper Clubman models: a lightly optioned Cooper Clubman with the 1.5-liter three-cylinder turbo and six-speed manual, and a well-optioned Cooper S Clubman with the 2.0-liter turbocharged four-cylinder and eight-speed automatic.

Size Matters

While the previous-generation Clubman offered Mini devotees a smidge more room than the standard Hardtop and somewhat easier rear-seat access via a rear half-door on the right side, the 2016 Cooper Clubman (internal code F54) offers two conventional rear doors. Overall length is up accordingly, the Clubman now measuring 168.3 inches long, adding 12.4 inches to the previous Clubman’s 155.9-inch measurement. For the record, the new Clubman also is longer than the taller Countryman by between 5.2 and 6.6 inches (depending on the Countryman’s spec). Width gets a bump, too, the new car coming in at 70.9 inches in comparison to the previous 66.3-inch figure. While the increase in length is immediately obvious to even the casual eye—thanks in no small part to the prominent presence of the rear doors—the increase in width is hardly discernible. To put its size into perspective, consider that the Cooper Clubman is still just 0.8-inch longer than the current Volkswagen Golf four-door hatchback, 7.3 inches shorter in length than the Mazda 3 hatchback, and a full 11.3 inches shorter than the Volkswagen Golf SportWagen.

Although it’s true that the enlarged exterior proportions have cleared the way for increased interior space, packages and other cargo stand to benefit the most. While the driver and front-seat passenger get more shoulder room (up by 4.4 inches to 54.7), that same measurement in the rear has increased by a significant 6.9 inches to a usable-by-actual-humans 52.8-inch total. Too bad about the hard bottom of the rear-seat cushion, which might make even the least whiny children (Mini claims there is room for three abreast, but we don’t see it) clamor for a break after a long stretch of highway travel. Cargo space is the real winner here, the new Clubman offering 47.9 cubic feet with the rear seats folded—15.1 cubic feet more luggage room than the previous Clubman. It’s enough, Mini claims, to fit a washing machine, although we can’t imagine any “cool uncle” doing his own laundry, let alone transporting an actual appliance; crates of hand-rolled cigars or artisan beard wax might be a more appropriate cargo.

The vibe from behind the wheel is classic Mini, although the automaker has bumped up the quality of the plastics a notch and cooked up some new upholstery schemes. Our Cooper S Clubman had the diamond-stitched Indigo Blue leather that is said to be inspired by classic English Chesterfield sofas, something our cool uncle spent plenty of time sleeping on—although likely not of the actual Chesterfield label and much more foul-smelling. The base car had cloth/leatherette seats that offer surprising comfort and bolsters that feel a bit more aggressive than the seats in the Cooper S Clubman. Either way, if you like the way you fit in any current Mini product and have adapted to their normalized ergonomics, you’ll be happy seated in the new Clubman.

Motivation Is a Relative Concept

Producing 134 horsepower and 162 lb-ft of torque, the 1.5-liter turbo three-cylinder is nothing if not consistent. Full grunt comes on at 1250 rpm and basically maintains turbine-like pull to its 6500-rpm redline. While it doesn’t qualify as quick, it’s definitely willing and encourages you to exploit everything it has to offer. All Clubmans are front-wheel drive, but a Mini designer casually told us that “it would be easy to produce an all-wheel-drive Clubman.”

Running through the gears with the manual is a delightful process, the shifter offering medium to short throws and intuitive action. Steep grades require skipping down a gear or three, which highlights the light action of the clutch. For the record, a Mini rep confided in us that earlier prototypes utilized a heavier clutch with a more specific point of engagement, but it was determined that a lighter effort would appeal to a broader range of drivers.

The same characteristics of the Cooper Clubman are present in the Cooper S version, only amplified. With 189 horsepower and 207 lb-ft of torque, the turbo four is more in tune with the mission of punting this pint-size hauler through life. Paired with an optional eight-speed automatic ($1500) engineered by Aisin, the engine easily hustles the Cooper S Clubman to triple-digit speeds and stays there without any complaints from under the hood. Around town, the extra thrust imbues the Clubman with the kind of point-and-squirt capabilities that make driving a small car so appealing. With eight forward gears from which to choose, the transmission could easily get too busy, but keen calibration algorithms keep a lid on unnecessary gear swaps. Tugging on the wheel-mounted paddles elicits quick shifts on demand, and as with its three-cylinder little brother, the four actually enjoys searching for its 6500-rpm redline. One area of disappointment is the exhaust note. It’s not particularly throaty with either engine, and nary a snort or burble could be coaxed, even in Sport mode.

Which brings us to the Cooper Clubman’s single most revelatory quality: silence. All of the clamorous traits—road noise, wind noise, body squeaks and rattles, crude window-motor operation—we learned to live with in our now-departed, long-term Mini Cooper S Countryman ALL4 were pleasantly absent in the new Clubman. Mini says it added sound-deadening materials and worked hard to reduce wind and road noise.

Secrets are the cornerstone to any skilled cool uncle’s game, and the Clubman keeps a few of its own. The 14.2:1 electric power steering is familiar but could be a little more communicative, and we wouldn’t exactly complain if effort increased a little earlier in the process of turning the wheel. While easy to modulate, the brake pedal doesn’t really engage you in any meaningful manner. That said, repeated panic stops from 80 mph revealed competent ABS calibration, which aided in hauling the car down with little drama.

Cachet Costs Money, How Cool Do You Want to Be?

In typical Mini fashion, the options sheet will let you build your car just about any way you want, and Mini says fully one-third of its sales are customer-ordered rather than taken from dealer stock. Both of our test cars were equipped with the Sport package, (Dynamic Damper Control, LED headlamps, and 17-inch Vent Spoke aluminum wheels on the base car, 18-inch Star Spoke wheels on the Cooper S for an additional $250). Our Cooper Clubman escaped otherwise relatively unscathed. In addition to the $24,950 base price and aforementioned Sport package ($2000), it included a small grouping of very reasonable options: British Racing Green metallic paint ($500), cloth and leatherette upholstery ($750), heated front seats ($500), Technology package ($1750, includes navigation, a backup camera, and parking sensors), and satellite radio with a one-year subscription ($300). All in, the MSRP hit $30,750.

The Cooper S Clubman starts at $28,500. In addition to the Sport package ($1500 here), our test car included Chesterfield leather upholstery ($1750), a Premium package ($1800 for keyless entry, a panoramic sunroof, and Harman/Kardon audio), the Sport automatic transmission ($1750), a fancier steering wheel ($250), chrome-line exterior ($250) and interior ($250) trim, and piano-black interior accents ($200), for a total MSRP of $39,550.

Our cool uncle? After blowing his college fund on the slopes of Aspen, he set out for Martha’s Vineyard, where he met a nice girl from Long Island. They moved to Florida and bought a Chevrolet Suburban configured with the rear barn doors. At least Mini got that detail right.

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