The internet is littered with videos about the right way to eat chicken wings, and they usually involve a host telling you to twist the bones just so in order to pull the bones out in one swift motion. These videos are three percent useful, and 97%...not. For some things, a lesson matters. Demonstrating how to get the meat out of the hard shell and hidden crevices of a lobster has real utility, but I'm pretty sure most of us can figure out how to tear chicken meat off the bone without a primer. We've got teeth, let's use 'em.

So this video is not about how to eat chicken wings. It's about how thoroughly you should eat them.

I'm the first to admit that I'm a complete jerk about this, but I can't help it. When I see wings discarded with mouthfuls of meat and skin left on the bone, I get peeved—clearly, since I felt passionate enough about it to make this video. Of course, people have every right to eat chicken wings however they want, and there's not a thing I can do about it. But if I ever find myself at the same table with a thriftless wing eater, I insist they order their own plate. They can waste their own wings, not mine.

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