Richard Simmons, in 2013. (Photo: David A. Walega/Getty Images)

Having accidentally become the subject of a bizarre internet manhunt by dint of politely asking people to leave him alone so that he could stop being famous for a minute, fitness guru Richard Simmons has finally been forced to confirm that he is fine, thank you, just like he’s been having his family and management tell people he was.


Simmons made his statement to People, speaking out after being hospitalized this past weekend for stomach issues. “Hello to everyone who has shown concern for me and sent their good wishes,” Simmons wrote. “You will never know how much it means to me. Aren’t you sick of hearing and reading about me?! LOL Well by now you know that I’m not ‘missing,’ just a little under the weather. I’m sure I will be feeling good and back home in a couple of days.” The “missing” comment was presumably a jab at Missing Richard Simmons, Dan Taberski’s hit podcast that attempted to turn Simmons’ desire for solitude into the next Serial.

Simmons went on to suggest that he might (intentionally) re-enter the public spotlight soon. A formerly tireless health advocate, he’d apparently been suffering from health issues for some time before heading to the doctor. “I reached out and I hope you will too,” he wrote. “I’m sure there are people in your life who love and care for you and would do anything to help you with the challenges you face. Just knowing you care has already made me feel better,” the statement said, in what’s either Simmons’ normally cheerful cadence or a good impersonation, depending on where you stand on the podcast conspiracy theorist spectrum. “Hope to see you again soon!”