L. RON ?

L. RON !

IT REALLY IS YOU !

OH THIS IS THE GREATESTDAY OF MY LIFE !

AW, DUDE, I NEEDTO GO TO BED.

DON'T YOUUNDERSTAND, L. RON ?

IT'S ME, TOM CRUISE.

YEAH, I KNOWWHO YOU ARE.

WELL HAVEN'TI DONE WELL, L. RON ?

HAVEN'T YOU ENJOYEDMY ACTING ?

WHICH FILM DIDYOU LIKE BEST ?

WELL... I MEAN...YOU'RE NOT, LIKE,

AS GOOD AS LEONARDO DiCAPRIO,BUT YOU'RE OKAY, I GUESS.

WHAT ?

I MEAN, YOU'RENOT GENE HACKMAN

OR THAT GUY THATPLAYED NAPOLEON DYNAMITE,

BUT YOU'RE OKAY.

I'M NOTHING !

I'M A FAILURE IN THEEYES OF THE PROPHET !

AAAHGHG !

HEY DUDE, I'M SORRYI DIDN'T MEAN IT.

GO AWAY !

DUDE, THISIS MY ROOM !

GO AWAY I SAID !

DAAAD, TOM CRUISE WON'TCOME OUT OF THE CLOSET !

WHAT ?

TOM CRUISE LOCKEDHIMSELF IN MY CLOSET

AND HE WON'T COME OUT.

MR. CRUISE ?

MR. CRUISE, COME OUTOF THE CLOSET.

NO.

COME ON, MR. CRUISETHIS IS RIDICULOUS.

I'M NEVERCOMING OUT !

WHAT DID YOUSAY TO HIM ?

I JUST TOLD HIM I THOUGHTTHE NAPOLEON DYNAMITE GUY

IS A BETTER ACTORTHAN HE IS.

OH BOY...

MR. CRUISE, YOU CAN'TJUST STAY IN THE CLOSET,

YOU NEED TO COME OUT.

WHAT'S GOING ON ?

TOM CRUISE WON'TCOME OUT OF THE CLOSET.

WHAT ?

JUST LEAVEME ALONE !

WELL, WE CAN'TLEAVE YOU ALONE

BECAUSE YOU WON'TCOME OUT OF THE CLOSET.