Raya is like the hipster, DJ-infested version of Fight Club. The first rule of Raya: You do not talk about Raya. The second rule of Raya: You do not talk about Raya, so much so that the app punishes you for even taking screen grabs. In fact, we're being a little bit naughty by just writing about it. The word has only leaked here and there, but as you read this, the likelihood is quite high that anyone associated with NYLON who has a Raya account is probably getting flayed by folks in black trench coats.

Do not worry: The so-called Tinder for Illuminati has built its cache by flying under the radar. Well, not entirely radar-less, as there are plenty of handsome model types and TV show stars who must've gotten their invites from somewhere, and we have a hard time thinking there is some sort of famous person Listserv that exists. (Is there? Is there a famous person Listserv?)

Here's what we know: The app has been around for over a year—and though it bills itself as a connector for "creative types," it mostly has very beautiful folks with 5,000-plus Instagram followers. And you want to see its allure? Watch this: It's very, very hard to get on. (Now, how badly do you want to get on it? See? Exclusivity works.)

So why would the super famous need a dating app to meet new people? Who knows, celebrities are mysterious creatures, like cats... even famous cats. (Note: No famous cats, thus far, on Raya.)

Now, there are regular citizens on Raya, so there is hope for all of us. However, the approval process is not exactly clear-cut. From what we can glean, you need to meet at least four out of the five following criteria in order to be accepted:

Have a cool and/or creative occupation Have a significant Instagram following Have other friends on Raya who can recommend you Be hot Maybe be magical?

Fortunately, a few of us have been blessed to have encountered some of these denizens of Raya (or, hey, maybe even got accepted to Raya ourselves, though rule number one prevents us from actually admitting that), and after being slightly starstruck by the company, we started compiling a list of famous people that popped up. Which means, they are eligible and want to date you, me, each other, or maybe a famous cat.

While we have heard that these people have browsed Raya at one point over the past few months, they might not be there at this very moment. Or maybe we hallucinated them entirely. Just kidding—we definitely confirmed their presence in one way or another, but with the app's dedicated opacity, their mere presence may have vanished into a vapor made of lost dreams, smoke machines, and adorable photos of pit bulls. You never know when a celeb might find what they're looking for and delete their account, though. (Notable fact: These profiles were connected to legitimate celebrity social media accounts, so we're assuming they're the real deal.)

See the famous faces—looking for love just like the rest of us—we've seen while browsing Raya after the break, so you know who you might encounter should you get in.

Photo by Jason Merritt/Getty Images

Name: Cara Delevingne

Profession: Actor, Model

Instagram: @caradelevingne

What if you met Cara D. on a dating app? That would be, like, adopting a gryphon on Petfinder.

Photo by Brendon Thorne/Getty Images

Name: Ruby Rose

Profession: Actor, Model

Instagram: @rubyrose

Ruby Rose is human catnip, and if you were a dating app, your entire marketing strategy should be: 1.) Get Ruby Rose on app 2.) ??? 3.) Profit.

Photo by Alberto E. Rodriguez/Getty Images

Name: Sharon Stone

Profession: Actor

Instagram: @sharonstone

Next time your parents suggest that Internet dating is ruining romance, point out that if it is good enough for Sharon Stone, then it is good enough for us silly plebes.

Photo by John Sciulli/Getty Images

Name: Diplo (Thomas Wesley Pentz)

Profession: Producer, Musician, DJ

Instagram: @diplo

Guys, in general, are super intimidated by Diplo—not only because he's good-looking, but he is also the coolest dude in the room.

Photo by Frederick M. Brown/Getty Images

Name: Joe Jonas

Profession: Musician

Instagram: @joejonas

True fact: We will follow Joe Jonas anywhere, even to the bottom of a boiling hot volcano filled with booger juice. (Please don't make us do that, Joe. We would, but please don't make us.)

Photo by Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty Images

Name: Alexander Wang

Profession: Fashion Designer

Instagram: @alexanderwangny

Being swiped right on by Alexander Wang is the dating version of winning the freaking lottery.

Photo by Jonathan Leibson/Getty Images

Name: Rivers Cuomo

Profession: Musician (Weezer)

Instagram: @rivers_cuomo

We mean, what could be a better tagline? Raya, the dating app used by the lead singer of Weezer.

Photo by Mark Davis/Getty Images

Name: Cody Simpson

Profession: Musician

Instagram: @codysimpson

Cody Simpson, you sweetheart, we adore you.

Photo by Chris Hyde/Getty Images

Name: Flume (Harley Edward Streten)

Profession: Musician, Producer

Instagram: @flumemusic

You've got to love a guy who can make you dance.

Photo by Jason Kempin/Getty Images

Name: Moby (Richard Melville Hall)

Profession: Musician, Producer

Instagram: @moby

What can we say? Moby has always been an early adopter.

Photo by Gary Gershoff/Getty Images

Name: John Cusack

Profession: Actor, Screenwriter

Instagram: @johncusack

Seriously, marry me, John Cusack, marry me—we are soul mates forever, I promise.

Photo by Michael Kovac/Getty Images

Name: Patrick Schwarzenegger

Profession: Model, Actor

Instagram: @patrickschwarzenegger

We swiped right on Patrick. He did not swipe right on us.

Photo by Rich Polk/Getty Images

Name: Fred Durst

Profession: Musician (Limp Bizkit)

Instagram: @freddurst

Fred

Freakin'

Durst.

Photo by Valerie Macon/Getty Images

Name: Teri Hatcher

Profession: Actor

Instagram: @officialterihatcher

Secretly—or not secretly at all—we hope Teri Hatcher is just breaking hearts of 20-somethings everywhere. (She probably is.)

Photo by Michael Buckner/Getty Images

Name: Samantha Ronson

Profession: Musician, DJ

Instagram: @samantharonson

Is she the coolest human on earth? There's only one way to find out. Swipe right.

Photo by Mike Windle/Getty Images

Name: Elijah Wood

Profession: Actor

Twitter: @elijahwood

He's such a little hobbit. Who wouldn't want some Elijah in their life?

Photo by Frederick M. Brown/Getty Images

Name: Bob Saget

Profession: Actor, Stand-Up Comic

Instagram: @bobsaget

Solid dad humor is a turn on.

Photo by Jason Kempin//Getty Images

Name: Eddie Huang

Profession: Restaurateur, Writer, TV Host

Instagram: @mreddiehuang

Just imagine the dinners!

Photo by Kevin Winter/Getty Images

Name: Eric Wareheim

Profession: Actor, Writer, Director

Instagram: @ericwareheim

How does one pick up the weirdest, funniest person alive?

Photo by Jason Kempin/Getty Images

Name: Hannibal Buress

Profession: Actor, Stand-Up Comic, TV Host

Instagram: @hannibalburess

All we'd be talking about is what the Broad City ladies are really like.

Photo by Mike Windle/Getty Images

Name: Matthew Perry

Profession: Actor

Twitter: @matthewperry

His profile name was "Matthew."

Photo by Jason Kempin/Getty Images

Name: Phoebe Dahl

Profession: Fashion Designer

Instagram: @pheobe

What if Phoebe Dahl matched with Ruby Rose? Awkward.

Photo by Neilson Barnard/Getty Images

Name: Raven-Symoné

Profession: Actor, TV Host

Instagram: @ravensymone

She's problematic. We like problematic.

Photo by Cindy Ord/Getty Images

Name: Ryan Lochte

Profession: Olympic Athlete

Instagram: @ryanlochte

"GUYS. RYAN LOCHTE IS ON RAYA. LOOK!"

Photo by Imeh Akpanudosen/Getty Images

Name: Zach Braff

Profession: Actor

Instagram: @zachbraff

Downside: He'll always be asking you, "And how did that make you feel?" Upside: Back rubs.

Photo by Astrid Stawiarz/Getty Images

Name: Zedd (Anton Zaslavski)

Profession: Musician

Instagram: @zedd

We wonder, would he play his own music during a date?

Photo by D Dipasupil/Getty Images

Name: Bonnie Wright

Profession: Actor

Instagram:@thisisbwright

Friends: How else can you date Ginny Weasley?