Image of the president almost done fucking America. Photo : Scott Olson ( Getty Images )

The only way that President Trump knows his ass from his hand is because South Carolina Sen. Lindsey Graham and Florida Rep. Matt Gaetz aren’t crammed up his arm. Other than that, the odds are pretty low that, at any given moment, the president has any fucking clue what’s going on.




So on Friday, the president set out to blast what NBC News calls “the nation’s preeminent evangelical publication,” a “far-left magazine” called Christianity Today after it called Trump’s quid pro quo activity with Ukraine “profoundly immoral” and even went so far as to call for him to be removed.

“A far left magazine, or very ‘progressive,’ as some would call it, which has been doing poorly and hasn’t been involved with the Billy Graham family for many years, Christianity Today, knows nothing about reading a perfect transcript of a routine phone call and would rather have a Radical Left nonbeliever, who wants to take your religion & your guns, than Donald Trump as your President,” Trump tweeted.




“No President has done more for the Evangelical community, and it’s not even close,” he continued. “You’ll not get anything from those Dems on stage. I won’t be reading ET again!” he wrote, apparently getting the initials of the magazine wrong.

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Meanwhile, Entertainment Tonight is wondering WTF it has to do with any of this and when it started putting out a magazine?!

All of this stems from the recent House vote to impeach the president. A day after the vote, “Christianity Today Editor-in-Chief Mark Galli wrote that not only was Trump’s conduct unconstitutional, but also ‘profoundly immoral.’”


“Let’s grant this to the president: The Democrats have had it out for him from day one, and therefore nearly everything they do is under a cloud of partisan suspicion,” he wrote, NBC News reports. “This has led many to suspect not only motives but facts in these recent impeachment hearings. And, no, Mr. Trump did not have a serious opportunity to offer his side of the story in the House hearings on impeachment.

“But the facts in this instance are unambiguous: The president of the United States attempted to use his political power to coerce a foreign leader to harass and discredit one of the president’s political opponents,” he continued, “That is not only a violation of the Constitution; more importantly, it is profoundly immoral.”


Galli also said that Trump “has dumbed down the idea of morality in his administration” and that his Twitter feed “is a near-perfect example of a human being who is morally lost and confused,” NBC News reports.

Boom!

Sadly for Evangelical America, whose men all tend to look like the Undertaker’s manager, Christianity Today founder the Rev. Billy Graham died last year. That’s OK because his son Franklin Graham is still alive and channeled his father in a Facebook post, noting that he “would not agree with” his publication and “would be very disappointed.”


“Christianity Today said it’s time to call a spade a spade,” Graham, a faith leader who has allied with Trump, wrote in a lengthy Facebook post. “The spade is this — Christianity Today has been used by the left for their political agenda. It’s obvious that Christianity Today has moved to the left and is representing the elitist liberal wing of evangelicalism.

“Is President Trump guilty of sin?” Graham continued. “Of course he is, as were all past presidents and as each one of us are, including myself. Therefore, let’s pray for the President as he continues to lead the affairs of our nation.”


Meanwhile, Entertainment Tonight is still trying to figure out why its Twitter mentions are in shambles.