Despite premonitions, I decide that an overground adventure is exactly what I need. I suit up in decent armour, grab a diamond sword, food, bow, arrows, and a bucket of lava, and make my way to the surface. The trade will be on my terms, I decide, and if people want to ambush me, then they’re out of luck.

I PM the potential trade partner, who offered one diamond and a few iron for my 12 obsidian. He had agreed that Obsidian mining was dangerous and was keen to make the trade, since he had a lot of diamond. I assured him that I would arrive promptly and told him to put the items in a chest at 1000,1000. Only then would I reveal where I had put the obsidian. He was to log out while I was at his chest, and then I would message him to finalise the deal on his end. I guzzle down some fresh watermelon and begin sprinting across the plains and up and down the mountains.

My journey takes me through swamps, deserts, mountain ranges and ocean but I eventually arrive within range. 1000,1000 unfortunately is underwater, and something feels fishy, but as my trading partner’s patience splinters, I decide to press on. I forget all about the plans I’d made and don’t even ask him to sign off.

Before I know what has happened, a diamond-armoured ambush is upon me and I am quickly cut to pieces. My items scatter and my time on the server comes to an abrupt end. Instantly I curse my idiocy for both trusting another and neglecting the precautions I should have insisted upon. I log off and am reunited with the real world. It hurts. I feel so stupid and am very disappointed. Later, insult is added to injury as the group circulate an image of my resting place as a warning to others. Curses, I’ve become a political message!

“Death cortesy of Umbram Phoenicibus”