Sexually transmitted diseases are a huge problem in the UK, with nearly half a million new cases being reported last year, a record high. Instead of combating the issue in a common sense way such as teaching kids how to use condoms, around $6.5 million will be spent developing a chip the size of a standard USB key that can plug into either a laptop or mobile phone that once peed on and then analyzed will be able to tell people if they’ve got a case of the cooties. The goal is to make the devices less than $2 to purchase and will be made available in night clubs so you can check your partner out before doing the horizontal polka.

“Your mobile phone can be your mobile doctor. It diagnoses whether you’ve got one of a range of STIs, such as chlamydia or gonorrhea and tells you where to go next to get treatment,” said Dr Tariq Sadiq, a senior lecturer and consultant physician in sexual health and HIV at St George’s, University of London, who is leading the project. “We need to tackle the rising epidemic of STIs, which have been going up and up and up. Britain is one of the worst [countries] in western Europe for teenage pregnancy and STIs. That there’s a major embarrassment factor here, especially among young people, makes the situation worse.”

In other news, if you can’t get laid in your home country, then fly on over to the UK and your probability of knocking up a teenage girl goes up tremendously. But in all seriousness, if you’re in your 20s then you probably have an active sex life. Just get tested on a frequent basis. I go every 3 months, to protect both myself and the people I care about. There’s nothing to be ashamed about.

[Via: Textually]