Monster-Cooking Rules

E

ver wonder what it might be like to eat a monster? Don't lie, of course you have. If you have proficiency in Cook's Utensils, a suitable corpse that hasn't been rendered inedible, and a questionable code of ethics, you can spend a short rest cooking the monster. You can prepare enough monster meat to feed six people, provided you have enough of it.

Servings by Creature Size

Size Servings Tiny 2 or less Small 4 Medium 8 Large 16 Huge 32 Gargantuan 64 or more

Monsters can be eaten during the same rest in which they were cooked, or saved for later. They must be consumed within 3 days of killing, or the meat will lose its magical properties.

Non-magical meat, when properly cooked, restores 1 extra hit point per Hit Die spent during a short rest (as per the cooking utensils rules in Xanathar's Guide to Everything). Magical meat may restore more, depending on the type.

Monster Types

Some types of monsters are more suited for consumption than others.

Bonuses from monsters do not stack, and you can eat only one serving during a short rest. Any magical benefit or ability gained from eating monster meat expires after 8 hours, or if you gain another such ability from eating a different creature.

Aberrations are not meant for mortal stomachs. Make a DC 15 Wisdom saving throw. On a success, you gain 60ft. telepathy, and 2 extra hit points per Hit Die. On a failure, take 2d6 psychic damage and gain a random form of long-term madness, as described on page 260 of the DMG.

Beasts make nice, normal meals, that normal people eat. Beasts produce non-magical meat.

Celestials shouldn't be eaten. What's wrong with you? Regain 5 extra hit points per Hit Die, and temporary hit points equal to your level x 2. Other celestials will recognize you as an enemy on sight, forever- unless the Celestial was evil, or you obtain its forgiveness, or you consumed the meat unknowingly.

Constructs are inedible, unless you happen to be able to eat whatever substance the construct is made out of.

Dragons are the ultimate meat for any true monster chef. If the dragon is a true dragon, regain all hit points, and gain a one-use breath weapon equivalent to the dragonborn breath weapon of the same type. Otherwise, regain 3 extra hit points per Hit Die.

Elementals are inedible. You can drink a dead water elemental, but it won't confer any bonuses. It's just water.

Fey eat people all the time, it's fine. Don't worry about it. Regain 3 extra hit points per Hit Die, and you gain one casting of Misty Step.

Fiends usually dissolve into foul ichor when slain outside of their native plane, so a prospective fiend-eater will have to travel to the lower planes and eat a fiend there. If you somehow manage to pull this off, take 8d6 necrotic damage. You gain a one-use ability to summon a fiend of the DM's choice, in an empty space you can see up to 30 ft away, as an action. The fiend is immediately hostile upon summoning, and lasts for an hour or until reduced to 0 hit points.

Giants are at least somewhat intelligent. Try not to think about it. Regain 3 extra hit points per Hit Die, and gain one casting of enlarge/reduce. You can only use this spell to enlarge, and can only target yourself.

Humanoids definitely count as cannibalism, so you must succeed on a DC 10 Charisma saving throw or vomit up the meat (assuming you are a humanoid). This DC increases to 15 if the meat is from a humanoid of the same species as you. Regain 2 extra hit points per Hit Die, if you pass.

Monstrosities make up the bulk of a monster cook's dishes. Regain 3 extra hit points per Hit Die.

Oozes are inedible, and usually corrosive. Don't try.

Plants, if formerly monsters, grant 2 extra hit points per Hit Die, and you gain one casting of thorn whip. Charisma is your spellcasting ability for this spell. Normal plants produce non-magical "meat".

Undead are inedible, unless they were alive until very recently (and remain corporeal). In this case, use the rules for whatever type of monster it was in life, and take 2d12 necrotic damage as you consume the necrotic energy which suffuses the corpse.

Monster Meat in the World

Non-humanoids consuming monster meat might experience different effects. Most monsters have no qualms about eating humanoids, for instance. A fiend consuming a celestial might make it more powerful, a hag might receive a bonus from eating a humanoid, or a construct might be able to burn meat for fuel.

Monster meat is considered a delicacy by a rare few, and players may be able to find a noble or two willing to pay good money for it. Creatures like lizardfolk or the monstrous races rarely have qualms with eating monster. Larger and more powerful monsters, such as dragons, may even prefer monster meat over any other food.

Monsters are, more often than not, part of their local ecosystem. Bringing enough rations to these places to last months or years is difficult, so parties of wilderness explorers and dungeon delvers often learn to subsist on the local monsters.