The Modi wave is not going anywhere. After sweeping the Lok Sabha Elections 2014, the BJP dominated Maharashtra winning an impressive 122 seats and upstaging their ex-allies Shiv Sena, who ended up with 63. The Congress ended up with 42 seats, while the NCP – whom Modi called the Nationally Corrupt Party – ended up with 41. The biggest loser was arguably Raj Thackeray’s MNS that won just one seat, which beats the theory that attacking outsiders is enough to get votes!

The way things are going; many politicos could soon be looking for an alternate career. Here are some suggestions:

Rahul Gandhi – Stand-up Comedian Baba was never meant to be in politics, but like his father, he forced to toe the family line. The Congress’ dismal performance, ever since Rahul was projected as the face of the party vindicates this. His real profession, the thing he was meant to do – is stand-up comedy. He wouldn’t even need to do much, just stand up and be himself!

Raj Thackeray – Bond Villain There was a time when everyone thought Raj Thackeray was the real deal, but he learned the hard way that you just can’t pick a fight with Big B and hope to be in power! He would, however, make a perfect Bond villain – he has the charisma, the oratory power and mindless minions too!

Sharad Pawar – Defence Lawyer I had trouble deciding what Pawar would be more suited to – test crash dummy or defence lawyer? But we decided to go with defence lawyer since he’s only withstood physical force once. Over the years, Pawar has proved adept at denying his involvement in any wrongdoing and we’re certain he’d be able to get clients off faster than Denny Crane.

RR Patil – Roast Host A man of his talent deserves to be in a profession that would truly allow him to demonstrate his foot-in-mouth skills properly! A roast is an event where a particular person is subjected to insults as a mock counter to a toast. The man who called the 26/11 attacks ‘a small incident that happened in a big city’ would do well in an environment that demands sarcasm!

Uddhav Thackeray – Consigliere A term popularised by The Godfather, the consigliere is a position in the Italian mafia where the individual provides important advice to the main Don. The position is an important one requiring finesse and is for people who are more comfortable in the engine room than the main stage. Given the Shiv Sena’s numbers, I guess that’s where Uddhav will be spending his time.

Prithviraj Chavan – (Alternate Profession: President of India)The ex-CM of Maharashtra has a lot of similarities with Manmohan Singh – they’re both highly educated, have a ‘clean’ image, are of a quiet disposition and are happy to nod along to Mrs Gandhi. All these qualities make him perfect to become the President -- a position that is largely ceremonial – and make Alia Bhatt’s gaffe a self-fulfilling prophecy.