Well, now we're back, and it wasn't some terrible dream. El Caudillo del Mar-A-Lago is still less than a month away from the nuclear codes, and he still can't seem to control himself whenever he's within 15 yards of his telephone.

Over the happy holiday weekend, he took to the electric Twitter machine to a) propose a new nuclear arms race, b) scare the hell out of Pakistan, c) pretend that he didn't want those icky A-listers at his party anyway, d) lie about the nature of his "charitable foundation," e) take credit for All Good Things since November 8, and f) get handsomely trolled by the current president of the United States, who opined on David Axelrod's podcast that, had he and Trump run against each other, he would have left Trump with a very clean clock.

Up with this, of course, Himself would not put. Per CBS News:

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President Obama said that he thinks he would have won against me. He should say that but I say NO WAY! - jobs leaving, ISIS, OCare, etc. — Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) December 26, 2016

At least he deleted the "JOSE!" after "NO WAY!" Pivoting!

(Also, hey, Boris? Woodstock was almost 50 damn years ago. Please try to keep up.)

The point is that he couldn't let this obvious affront to his world-historical 46th biggest landslide in presidential history go unanswered, while not uttering a peep when his primary surrogate in New York state was unleashing a barrage of unspeakable racist venom at the current First Family. I mean, the guy's own kid has deplored what his old man said. Not the president-elect, though. He's too busy protecting his mandate from imaginary challenges. At this point, I think if the president suggested running through a tiger pit wearing a meat suit, the president-elect would go out and buy some double-breasted lamb chops. Please keep this up, Mr. President. You have a little more than 20 days left of this kind of fun.

Scott Olson Getty Images

But it's also important to keep an eye on what's going down out there beyond the fences of Camp Runamuck. Empowered conservative dickitude really showed its fangs over the holidays. There was this professor down at Drexel named George Ciccariello-Maher, who tweeted out a sarcastic, "All I want for Christmas is white genocide," not realizing that among the minions, "white genocide" is one of the high worship-words that only the chiefs and sons of chiefs may utter.

Naturally, this sent the crowd at Breitbart's Mausoleum For The Otherwise Unemployable all a'twitter, and The Daily Caller, ever content to be the last fly on the dungheap, chimed right in. The university already went mushy on defense. (Corey Robin has a good wrap-up.) Expect to see more of this in the next few months. Who knew these ruff-tuffers were such special snowflakes.

Oh, I forgot to mention that the president-elect has a remarkable notion of what the United Nations is.

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The United Nations has such great potential but right now it is just a club for people to get together, talk and have a good time. So sad! — Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) December 26, 2016

Y'all should've seen it when DJ Hammarskjold was spinning. Place was dope, I tell you.

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Charles P. Pierce Charles P Pierce is the author of four books, most recently Idiot America, and has been a working journalist since 1976.

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