Tell him one or two of the following lines and he’ll be glad you kicked him out the door.

1. "Sure your mother never liked me anyway" - Forces him to think of it as a choice between you and the mammy - she wins anyway.

2. "Sure you can get back with the lads now and the craic in the pub" - Watch him light up with the idea of cheering in the local with the lads for the Yankees/ManUtd/Jets whomever without a care in the world.

3. "I’ll miss going shopping with you" - Guaranteed to have him break out in a cold sweat.

4. "It means we won’t have to go to therapy together to discuss our feelings after all" - He’ll think he’s the luckiest man alive.

5. "My girlfriends will miss you when I tell them" - A gaggle of women discussing him - Ouch!

6. "I’ll miss all the weepie movies we went to" - Great he’ll think, now for some Terminator-type mindless blood and gut.

7. "I thought we’d either get married or break up." - He’ll wipe the sweat off his brow - commitment? What’s that?

8. "At least I can stop planning the honeymoon" - Wow, dodged a bullet there.

9. "You would have made great babies" - Ahh get me out of here.

10. "I had been planning the hen party for months" - Jesus, call it the great escape.

* Originally published in 2011.