Nation Actually Impressed It Took Trump 200 Days To Tweet Nuclear Threat

U.S.—After President Trump promised “fire and fury” and appeared to tweet threats to use nuclear weapons against North Korea Wednesday, Americans across the nation expressed that they were “actually pretty impressed” that Trump made it so far into his presidency before threatening to use the United States’ vast nuclear arsenal against another country.

“Honestly I thought he’d tweet about flinging a nuke on the way back from the inauguration ceremony,” an Ohio man told reporters. “So to get a full 200 days before the end of the world kicks off is just gravy for me.”

Political commentators agreed, stating that even their most optimistic models showed the president threatening nuclear war within his first few weeks in office, with the majority predicting a barrage of nuclear strikes in late January earlier this year.

“Every day of this presidency that we haven’t turned the world into a real-life version of Fallout 3 is a real blessing from God,” one woman in California said. “I am so thankful that we’ve been able to live our lives radiation free a full six months longer than we expected.”

“I’m really just amazed he has shown such restraint, up until now,” she added.

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