WAIT, STOP !

DAD, YOUR OLD CRAP COUNTS !

BONO NEVER TOOK A SECOND CRAPTHAT BEAT YOURS !

GET HIM OUT OF HERE !

WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT,YOUNG MAN ?

SOMEBODY'S BEENKEEPING IT A SECRET.

BONO WAS NEVER THERECORD HOLDER.

HE'S THE RECORD.

IT'S NOT TRUE !

KILL THAT KID !

I WANT HIM DEAD !

IT'S TOO LATE, BONO.

THE BOY HASLEARNED THE TRUTH.

HEIR BROLOF,WHAT DO YOU KNOW OF THIS ?

IT'S TRUE, I'M AFRAID.

YOU SEE, UNTIL MR. MARSHCAME ALONG,

I WAS THE RECORDHOLDER FOR THE BIGGEST CRAP.

I TOOK IT BACK IN 1960.

IT WAS THE MOST AMAZINGCRAP I'D EVER TAKEN.

PAPA, NO !

SAY NOTHING MORE !

COME TO ME,MY DARLING PRECIOUS CHILD.

( crying )

AFTER I HAD BROKEN THE RECORD,I TOOK THE CRAP HOME.

I WAS SO PROUD OF ITTHAT I DECIDED TO KEEP IT,

TO TRY AND RAISE ITLIKE A CHILD.

NO, PAPA.

NO, PAPA.

THERE, THERE,MY LITTLE CRAP, DON'T CRY.

HERE, DO YOU WANTTHE BIDDY ?

HMM ?

DOES BONOWANT THE BIDDY ?

( slurping )

YES, HE LIKESTHE BIDDY, DOESN'T HE ?

DUDE.

I KEPT THE CRAPIN MY OFFICE.

NURSED IT, FED IT BIDDY.

AND SOONBIDDY MADE HIM STRONG,

BIDDY MADE HIM GROW UP...

INTO ONE OF THE MOST INFLUENTIALFIGURES OF OUR TIME.

EASY, BONO,THAT HURTS THE BIDDY.

BIDDY !

MY LITTLE CRAP HASACCOMPLISHED MANY THINGS,

BUT HE COULD NEVERSHED THE FACT

THAT HE WASREALLY A NUMBER TWO.

SO HE SPENT HIS LIFE TRYINGTO BE NUMBER ONE...

IN EVERYTHING.

THAT'S WHY HE'SABLE TO DO SO MUCH,

TRY TO HELP SO MANY PEOPLE,

BUT STILL SEEM LIKESUCH A PIECE OF S--T.

YOU HAVE BLEMISHED

THIS NOBLE SOCIETY'SGOOD NAME, HEIR BROLOF !

HAVE I ?!

LOOK AT THE CRAP I TOOKALL THOSE YEARS AGO !

BONO IS NOWALMOST SIX FEET TALL

AND OVER 80 COURICSIN WEIGHT !

NO MATTERHOW YOU LOOK AT IT,

HE IS STILL THE RECORD !

OH, GOD, HERE IT COMES !

OH, HOT, HOT,HOT, HOT !

HOT, HOT,HOT, HOT, HOT, HOT !

HA-HA-HAAA...

MY GOD !

IT MUST OVER100 COURICS !

DAD, ARE YOU ALL RIGHT ?

YEAH, I'M...

YEAH, I'M GOOD.

I FEEL A LOT BETTER.

MR. MARSH, WE APOLOGIZE.

AND IF IT'S OKAY WITH YOU,WE WOULD LIKE TO PRESENT YOU

YOUR LONG-OVERDUE TROPHY.

THRRRRPT !