Jani Chinweoke TITLE: Book "Worm"

SCAMMER NAME: Chinweoke Trevor Nwauzor/Jani Adams

SCAMMER LOCATION: Abidjan, Cote D'ivoire

SCAMBAITER: Shiver Metimbers as Michael Palin & Thomas Cook

PAGE TWO From: Thomas Cook

To: Chinweoke Trevor Nwauzor Dear Mr. Nwauzor, I am sorry for your present problems, but I am afraid they are not my concern. I gave you very clear instructions about the files. In the current state that they are, they are completely useless to us. My board of directors will simply not authorize a payment of thousands of pounds for work which we cannot use. Do you really expect me to pay you many thousands of pounds for work I cannot use? Would you go into a store to buy bread that was full of poison? Would you be happy to pay for food that was impossible to eat? I am afraid your personal conditions can not be taken into account. My customers are not interested in any personal problems I may have. If I cannot provide them with the service for which they are paying for they do not want to listen to my excuses, they will simply go away and find another person to give them what they want. I have more than enough money at hand to pay off any of your outstanding debts and expenses. Is it my fault that you seem to ignore what I am telling you? I cannot authorize even one dollar until we get what we are paying you for. I am afraid that you should have known beforehand that the sound on the files would have been unacceptable to us. All I can offer you is a few more extra days to complete the work if you are able to, however I must make it VERY CLEAR to you that any noise on the sound files will not be accepted. If you decide that you do not wish to continue then that is fine, I have another person on standby ready to do the work in your place. Sincerely, Tom Cook - CEO

Pesky Pirate Audio & Video Productions Ltd. OUCH! Chinweoke is not a happy bunny! Shortly after sending the above message, a furious Chinweoke calls me on the telephone, and without giving me a chance to reply, lets me know how unhappy he is: Chinweoke IS READY TO KICK SOME ASS (206k MP3) Chinweoke's obviously a little upset, and you may have trouble making out what he's saying, so here's a transcript: "Mr. Thomas, you have killed me! You have killed me! How will I say the people who I've borrowed money from? What do you want me to do? You have killed me! After working for you, you said you are not going to pay me. God will judge you, eh?!" After taking about 10 minutes to calm down (but only a little!) Chinweoke sent the following email: From: Chinweoke Trevor Nwauzor

To: Thomas Cook

Subject: Re: CHECK THE DOWNLOAD What do you want me to do? You have just killed me, I dont know where I am going to after this night, I am finished, people told me several things about you but I ignored them, now it is manifesting. Oh God, you have done so well, I cannot live to use my eyes to suffer the humiliations, I will better commit suicideor I run away because that is the only remedy to stay out of the trouble that I have brought to my self. Usually if a scammer goes "off on one" with me, I usually reciprocate in kind! I hardly ever let a scammer get away with being rude at the best of times, however I really wanted to get this particular work completed, so I bit my tongue and replied: From: Thomas Cook

To: Chinweoke Trevor Nwauzor OK Tom Cook - CEO

Pesky Pirate Audio & Video Productions Ltd. One hour later. From: Chinweoke Trevor Nwauzor

To: Thomas Cook

Subject: Re: CHECK THE DOWNLOAD Please how can I make this without any sound under it? I am just running crazy and have to do this again because I do not know what to do. You should put yourself in my shoes, you should understand where I am coming from, I am not saying that you should use your money to buy poision. I do not have money but have been doing my best to get this done and you never agreed to understand where I am coming from. here is Africa and can never be compared like London, I used laptop to make this recording, I do not know what the person you got to do the work will use in doing it. I am just lost, I will be facing the punishment if I cannot pay back the money that I have borrowed. I am finished, my DJ may believe me but what about others? What am I going to tell the company where I hired the laptop? [You got screwed over by a scammer?] I have nothing to say because they have the copy of my passport and there is nothing that I will say before them that is not a phrase. Mr. Thomas I have gone a very long way to work for you, I do not know how I can satisfy your order, please call me, my head is running crazy here, I will be sleeping under the stair-case any moment from now because I have been throwned out which I just accepted and bared my mind to get money and rent a house after working for you, I am only committing my soul in the hand of God if I could not help the situation that means that the answer is suicide. Have mercy on me pls, I have been hugry for the past two days, it is only last night that I eat this long dried french bread, how can I survive all this? [Dog food?] Well it is left to God. From: Thomas Cook

To: Chinweoke Trevor Nwauzor Dear Mr. Nwauzor, Please do not give me stories about your conditions or what money you owe. Believe me, I have been in this business for 23 years now and I have heard so many similar stories. Nothing you can tell me can make me change my mind. You may think that I am being cruel to you however this is not the case. A very large company such as ours is always being approached by fraudsters who give us many excuses and lies, and because of this very reason this is why we never give any money or goods in advance. I am NOT of course saying that you are one of these people, I am simply explaining the reasons why your requests for help are simply a waste of your valuable time. Regarding how to get a noise free recording: I suggest you seek the advice of the DJ who was helping you. I know nothing of the PC/Laptop/Recording Equipment that you are using. I am sure that a DJ would have very suitable recording equipment of his own? I just looked on the Internet and I see that there are many recording studios and computer stores in Abidjan. Perhaps if you ask them for some advice face-to-face they may be able to help? I can only give you until Monday evening 30th July to complete the work. After that date I am afraid that I will have to move the work to somebody else because we are working on a very tight schedule. If my company misses the schedule we could lose many hundreds of thousands of pounds. I have already spent far more time with you than I would normally spend with someone submitting work. Please do remember that you are not the only person I am dealing with. It is only because I feel that you have a promising future with us that I am using so much of my time with you. You may well be at a cross-roads in your life where it can take a turn for something very good, or for something very bad. Please just remember that we do not give money away for nothing, and we never, ever pay for work that we have not yet received. I suggest you take advice from a technical expert in your area, and very quickly. Again, you need to make careful note of any expense you incur so that you can be given the money back. REMEMBER: It is your responsibility to ensure the recording is noise free. Do not blame me or my company if you send in work which is unacceptable. All that will do is waste more of your time and more of your money. Sincerely, Tom Cook - CEO

Pesky Pirate Audio & Video Productions Ltd. Some quality begging follows. From: Chinweoke Trevor Nwauzor

To: Thomas Cook

Subject: Re: MONDAY Dear Thomas Please advise me on what to do [get a real job, you doofus], I am really in need of working to help my self, people have started laughing at me and when they hear this, they simply say that they told me especially my brother, please help me and let me do this work so that I can stay on my own, I am very serious to take this again if I have any lasting solutions on how this noise will be no more. I have contacted the D.J who who erased the noise the my previous work and we agreed to get this done before Saturday, he said that th microphone in the laptop which I am using for the recording is of very low capacity and that is why the main background noise comes out when playing. Please Mr. Thomas, I pray thee to have confidence in me, I will do my best to complete this work, I have never asked you of money again and will not ask. That is why it seemed that I ignored your request to let you know how much I spent. It is not as if I ignored your request please but I want to forget every dam thing about money until you have confirmed that the job has been weldone. I hope you will understand, I am an orphan and I have to work hard if I want to be any good to myself, you should understand why it seems like I am casting all my problems on you, after all you can have me as your son because I am sure that you are old enough to be my father. You make me more strong and hardworking, by the time I shall finish this job, I am sure that I will be more inclined to do it myself in my upcoming jobs with you. [By the time you've finished this particular job Chinweoke, you'll probably be inclined to stick your head in the oven]

I wished that I could just come down to London and start work immediately with you, this would have been more viable to me, please advise me if you can use my payment for this work after to arrange all that it shall take for me to come down, I need to work with you because I am sure that you will change my life, please do not cast me away. I am not like other African scammers, I suffer to get my bread which I believe that it is the best life for me to live, I do not also wish to go back to my odd ways of life, I need you in my life, I am not trying to entize you because I understand that you think more better than the so called professors so to say because of your daily reading business, that is also how I want to be. Take me to be your son, I will never let you down, I am waiting for your call please, call me, let it not be like you are wasting time with me. Please calm down and forgive me if I have offended you because I know that you will definitely forgive me. Thanks, Chinweoke From: Thomas Cook

To: Chinweoke Trevor Nwauzor Dear Mr. Nwauzor, I shall await your second submission. If I may also give you some advice to pass on to the DJ: 1. When converting to MP3, to make the file size smaller, use a bit-rate of 128kbps instead of 196bps (this will reduce the size of the files by 20%-25%).

2. Make EACH CHAPTER a separate MP3 file. This way you will end up with 35 small MP3 files. Not only will it be easier for you to keep track on the file quality this way, but if you split the book up into recording the individual chapters on separate MP3 files, you will be able to email them to me directly, instead on using the more difficult way such as using RapidShare or Megaupload. I would advise you to send me a copy of the first chapter as soon as you have completed it so that I can let you know if the quality is OK before you spend time recording the rest. Please remember: The ONLY problem with your recording is the noise. Everything else was perfect, so take some heart in that. Sincerely, Tom Cook - CEO

Pesky Pirate Audio & Video Productions Ltd. From: Chinweoke Trevor Nwauzor

To: Thomas Cook

Subject: Re: MONDAY Dear Mr. Thomas, Thanks for your email, I shall do as you said, I will be going to sleep now, by morning I will be calling the D.J again to know the possibility of starting this work by tomorrow. As soon as it is done, I shall send it to you so that you will advise before I moves on. I have already stunched brigded my heart with a concrete courage, is shall all come to pass. Thanks for your care and understanding, will get back to you with any latest development. Goodnight, Chinweoke Some time later I decide to give Chinweoke a call to see what the situation is. Thomas Cook calls Chinweoke (375k MP3) Fingers crossed.... FINALLY! The completed MP3 files start to arrive over a period of around 24 hours. Chinweoke also lets me know what his expenses have been too! From: Chinweoke Trevor Nwauzor

To: Thomas Cook

Subject: DETAILS AND EXPENSES Dear Mr. Tom Cook, Sir, Here is the details which you have requested from me, I have completed the job and have also sent them over to you, I never wanted to put down this data but you asked me to do so. Printing and binding of documents: GBP 50.00

Rent of hotel room for one week: GBP 270.00

Rent of a Laptop for one week: GBP 400.00

Procurement of Workman, Mp3 CDs: GBP 100.00

Payment for Convertion of Record to MP3: GBP 200.00

Transportation: GBP 200.00

Telephone calls: GBP 200.00

Hiring of Two D.Js for one week: GBP 1, 400.00 Total GBP 2,820.00 [Hmm. I have a feeling Chinweoke is trying to pull a fast one here! TWO DJs? Renting a hotel room?]

My concern is my personal payment so that I can start settling the debts which I have ran into because I am in a very tight corner but my only happiness is that I have given you the sound result of what you need. I have called your telephone line for barely ten times now so please call me as soon as you send the payment so that I will check my email and pick it up. I am waiting for your call so that I can have a little rest and give my eyes some sleep. Please send over more jobs to be done, advise when you are sending my working equipments because I need the sound equipment which you uses to make your own recording so that I can always give the exact thing you need from me. I am so sorry about all my wrongful attitude to you in the past and promised that I will henceforth work with you in accordance with your working terms and condition. I will also like to confirm to you that all the payments should be made through my details which I have given to you already. Chinweoke. The MP3 files below range in size from 1 megabyte up to 16 megabytes. Readers with slow connections may want to right-click on the links below and "save as" the files to their computers for off-line listening pleasure. If you're brave enough to sit on-line listening to this then get yourself a comfy chair as there's over eight hours of audio coming your way! First, Chinweoke gives us the INTRODUCTION Chapter 01 Chapter 08 Chapter 15 Chapter 22 Chapter 29 Chapter 02 Chapter 09 Chapter 16 Chapter 23 Chapter 30 Chapter 03 Chapter 10 Chapter 17 Chapter 24 Chapter 31 Chapter 04 Chapter 11 Chapter 18 Chapter 25 Chapter 32 Chapter 05 Chapter 12 Chapter 19 Chapter 26 Chapter 33 Chapter 06 Chapter 13 Chapter 20 Chapter 27 Chapter 34 Chapter 07 Chapter 14 Chapter 21 Chapter 28 Chapter 35 Also available is a ZIPPED single file containing all 35 chapters plus the intro. You can DOWNLOAD IT HERE (223 meg). From: Thomas Cook

To: Chinweoke Trevor Nwauzor Dear Mr. Nwauzor, I confirm receipt of all the files now and also your expense listing. There will be no problem getting the payment for you. Please note that you will have to sign and date a release form which I have attached to this email. Please print it out, then complete it, and the scan it back in (make sure it his a HIGH QUALITY scan) and then send it back to be by email attachment ASAP. This is the final stage of your submission, and once we receive the completed form your payment will be sent immediately. [Honestly, I do mean immediately. The definition of my "immediately" may differ from Chinweoke's however] The release form gives us control over the work you have sent and gives your permission for us to use it. Just sign and date it and then return a scanned copy to us by email attachment. I am sorry that I have not been available by telephone for most of the day however I have been busy with a very important board meeting. Sincerely, Tom Cook - CEO

Pesky Pirate Audio & Video Productions Ltd. RELEASE FORM ATTACHED From: Chinweoke Trevor Nwauzor

To: Thomas Cook

Subject: FILES COMPLETED/PLS PICKUP YOUR CALLS Dear Thomas Here is a signed copy of the document you requested. Chinweoke. Chinweoke attaches the signed form: Thanks for the form Chinweoke, but I want more! From: Thomas Cook

To: Chinweoke Trevor Nwauzor Dear Mr. Nwauzor, Thank you for sending back the completed form. My accountant has just told me that your total payment will exceed UK £10,000, I hope that you are able to collect such a large payment in one part? I will be going to the W.U. office later this morning to facilitate the payment, however my accounts officer has reminded me that we shall first require a scan of some kind of photo ID such as your passport for our records and to enable future identification (ref. future work/payments). Please can you send me a good quality scan of your passport to add to our records when you receive this email. Sincerely, Tom Cook - CEO

Pesky Pirate Audio & Video Productions Ltd. From: Chinweoke Trevor Nwauzor

To: Thomas Cook

Subject: Re: FILES COMPLETED/PLS PICKUP YOUR CALLS Dear Mr. Tom Cook, I have attached here my international passport here for your perusal and records, I am know quite sure that my payment will exceed £10, 000.00. I will be able to collect because I shall present the agreement to the western union agent. Please on your making of the payment, advise them to pay all to me as soon as I present my international passport my copy of the agreement which we have signed yesterday. Also call me upon your sending of the money if possible, send all the complete details as soon as you make it for my pick up. I shall expect your response as soon as possible. Regards, Chinweoke. Chinweoke attaches his passport which is actually a real Nigerian passport. It matches up with the name Chinweoke is using, so one of two things is going on here: Either Chinweoke has acquired/stolen the passport and is assuming the identity on it, or, because Chinweoke believes this deal to be totally real, he's using his real passport as he believes using a fake one for ID may screw up his chances.