This may be an unpopular view, but The Speech will be on TV in the shebeen on Tuesday night, and it should be. No matter how he got there, El Caudillo del Mar-a-Lago is the President* of the United States and he gets airtime if he wants it. (That Barack Obama was denied airtime under similar circumstances only means that the gutless walking algae who run America's communication corporations are more frightened of this president*'s base supporters than they were of Obama's, and that's been the case for decades. How else has Bill Kristol had a television career? Obama should have gotten it, too.) I am not as nervous about The Speech as some people are.

There's a report that Jared, the Dauphin Prince Grifter, is going around saying that The Speech, combined with the president*'s trip to the southern border, will turn the country around on the big, stupid wall, and on the big, stupid government shutdown that has resulted from the president*'s tantrum over the big, stupid wall. I would bet Kushner a substantial number of riyals that he is wrong about this.

The Dauphin speaks. Win McNamee Getty Images

Yes, it will be full of lies and bullshit. Yes, it will be badly delivered. Yes, some people on TV after it's over will say stupid things about it. But he will not change a single mind no matter what he says. Nobody will be taken by surprise. Nobody will change their minds in the least. There will be nothing in the speech that would cause anyone to re-evaluate any opinion about either the big, stupid wall or the big, stupid shutdown. Everybody already knows that. We are immunized.

I only wish we'd had this kind of pre-emptive fact-checking widely across the media when C-Plus Augustus and his cheerleaders were lying the country into Iraq. Listening to David Frum, of all people, warning us against the dangers of mendacious presidential speechmaking pretty much buries the needle on my Irony Meter. But this is some of the stuff we're supposed to worry about later, after the White House is democratically fumigated.

Brian Blanco Getty Images

For now, I'll go along with that—but only because the indications are that the president*'s speech may kick off a planned program of obviously impeachable offenses.

If the president* declares a national emergency in the absence of an actual emergency, that's an impeachable offense.

If the president* plans to build a wall as a response to the national emergency that does not exist, that's an impeachable offense.

If the president* plans to build a wall as a response to the national emergency that does not exist, and proceeds to use the powers of his office to order people to do start building it, that's an impeachable offense.

If the president* plans to build a wall as a response to the national emergency that does not exist, and proceeds to use the powers of his office to order people to start building it, and proceeds to seize private property on which to build it, that's an impeachable offense.

Abuses of power, all of them. As deliberate and clear as, say, shooting someone on Fifth Avenue would be clear and deliberate murder.

If this happens, and then nothing happens from the Congress in response, that's when we have something to worry about. That's when the whip comes down.

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Charles P. Pierce Charles P Pierce is the author of four books, most recently Idiot America, and has been a working journalist since 1976.

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