Divorce is a costly battleground, and our antiquated laws aren’t fit for purpose. No wonder marriage continues to decline in popularity. At the moment, our judicial system still entertains the ludicrous concept of blame, where one side has to take responsibility for a breakdown.

The people who profit from this mess are lawyers, and the results are not just protracted and expensive, but cruel. Recently, a woman whose 39-year marriage was described as “loveless” was refused a divorce, because neither side was prepared to be named as “guilty”. This week, she lost her case in Court of Appeal, a ruling which was branded "disgraceful".

Maintenance is another minefield – why should divorce entitle a former wife to an income for life? Expecting to be supported long after any children have finished their education seems to be asking for special treatment. Yet most judges (men) seem to think that women need help, and should be allowed to live in the manner to which they had been accustomed.

The most shocking celebrity divorces Show all 20 1 /20 The most shocking celebrity divorces The most shocking celebrity divorces Amber Heard and Johnny Depp are understood to have reached a settlement in their divorce proceedings. Heard, 30, has dismissed her petition for a restraining order against Depp She has reportedly accepted a $7 million settlement The most shocking celebrity divorces The news about their split came after their 10-year wedding anniversary in June 2015 and despite all the reports, many fans didn't believe it could be true until Ben and Jen revealed their plans to divorce Getty Images The most shocking celebrity divorces Gwen Stefani and Gavin Rossdale announced their split after 13 years of marriage in August 2015 after Gavin was rumored to have had an affair with the family nanny Getty Images for L.A.M.B. The most shocking celebrity divorces Melanie and Antonio managed to make their marriage last 18 years before it was revealed in June 2014 that Melanie was divorcing Antonio Getty Images for Children's Hosp The most shocking celebrity divorces In October 2013 they shared that they had separated after three years of marriage Getty Images The most shocking celebrity divorces Tom Cruise announced that "Kate has filed for divorce" in June 2012. The couple were married for more than five years Getty Images The most shocking celebrity divorces Heidi and Seal's separation was announced in 2012 Getty Images The most shocking celebrity divorces Pop star Katy Perry has revealed that Russell Brand told her he was divorcing her in a text message. The couple split just 14 months after getting married in India in 2010 Getty Images The most shocking celebrity divorces In November 2011, Demi filed for divorce, saying, "As a woman, a mother and a wife, there are certain values and vows that I hold sacred, and it is in this spirit that I have chosen to move forward with my life" Getty Images The most shocking celebrity divorces In July 2011, J Lo and Marc released a statement saying, "We have decided to end our marriage. This was a very difficult decision. We have come to an amicable conclusion on all matters" Getty Images The most shocking celebrity divorces Gwyneth and Chris were married for more than 10 years and had 2 children together when they announced that they were "consciously uncoupling" Getty Images for Entertainment I The most shocking celebrity divorces After one of the most renowned cheating scandals of all time, Tiger Woods reportedly paid €89 million to his ex-wife in their 2010 divorce. As part of the settlement, the golfer also had to pay €48 million towards the couple's mortgage by January of this year Getty Images The most shocking celebrity divorces Madonna and filmmaker Guy Ritchie were married for eight years before splitting in 2008. The pop star reportedly paid Ritchie between €67 and €81 million, including the value of their London pub, the Punchbowl and their country home Getty Images The most shocking celebrity divorces Heather Mills was awarded £24.3m in her bitter divorce from Sir Paul McCartney The most shocking celebrity divorces Sarko and Cecilia: The true cost of Nicolas Sarkozy's split from wife Cécilia and remarriage to the (occasional) nude model Carla Bruni can be counted in two ways: first, in the unpleasant headlines surrounding the manner in which Cécilia was treated; and second, in the French opinion polls, which show Sarko as the most unpopular president in living memory GETTY IMAGES The most shocking celebrity divorces Bruce and Demi Moore: Divorce doesn't get better than this. After 13 years of marriage, they split in 2000, sharing custody of three daughters. Willis is so chummy with his ex that he attended her wedding to Ashton Kutcher. "Demi is the mother of my children and Ashton is the stepfather of my children. I'm thrilled that [he] turned out to be such a great guy," he gushed GETTY IMAGES The most shocking celebrity divorces Tom and Nicole: It took some time, but when the biggest Hollywood divorce of the 1990s was finally concluded, Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman allowed themselves a brief, celebratory punch of the air before getting on with life. They happily share custody of two adopted children, and both maintain (in public, at least) that they have "no regrets" about their relationship GETTY IMAGES The most shocking celebrity divorces Brad and Jennifer First: Jennifer Aniston had to cope with reports that her husband, Brad Pitt, was playing away with Angelina Jolie on the set of Mr & Mrs Smith. Then, she suffered the indignity, amid rumours about her alleged refusal to have children, of seeing T-shirts bearing the slogan, "I'll have your baby, Brad" become a must-have fashion accessory GETTY IMAGES The most shocking celebrity divorces Charles and Diana: It's never easy to keep a sense of proportion about divorce. But when the chosen medium for announcing your separation is an announcement by the prime minister to the House of Commons, it is almost impossible. Charles and Diana's marital troubles inspired the greatest tabloid feeding-frenzy of modern times - with tragic results Getty Images The most shocking celebrity divorces Richard Burton and Elizabeth Taylor: If Taylor made a habit of nasty divorces, her life would hardly have been worth living: the actress has married no fewer than eight times, to seven different husbands. Most of her marriages ended (relatively) amicably. Richard Burton enjoyed divorcing her in 1974 so much that he remarried her in 1975, then divorced her again in 1976 Getty Images

I wonder why successive governments are so reluctant to reform divorce laws? The last attempt failed in the 1990s. Who are MPs frightened of offending? Modernising marriage and divorce would be the single most beneficial change we could make for future generations.

To ensure the institution of marriage is more attractive, it must be treated like a simple contractual arrangement, where the terms of separation, division of property and financial arrangements in the event of a breakup are included in the legal document that binds one person with another.

In short, getting married needs to be hard, and splitting up needs to be easier. When a marriage ends, no blame should be attached.

I’m astonished at the lack of knowledge exhibited by most cohabiting couples, even people with giant IQs, who imagine that they are in a better place than married couples. They need to wake up and realise they are living in the legal equivalent of la-la land: should they wish to split up, the process will be fraught with ambiguities and uncertainties.

Angelina Jolie speaks out about her divorce from Brad Pitt for the first time

Many will have to resort to costly legal proceedings to resolve issues relating to property and financial affairs. There will be bitterness and big bills.

We need to take religion, the embarrassing terminology, and the gush out of marriage. It should be fashioned into an institution that works in a modern society with equality laws, a society that treats women not as breeders, home makers or chattels, but as contributing partners in a business.

Unfortunately, some of our top legal experts are at loggerheads over divorce reform. Baroness Deech has introduced a private members bill that has passed two readings in the Lords and now goes to the Commons. It proposes to limit maintenance to three years, except in cases of hardship, in line with most divorces in Scotland, North America and the rest of Europe.

You can see how the legal profession and conservative Christians and religious groups might resist this. London has become the divorce capital of the world as wealthy women seek to fleece their former spouses, asking for obscene amounts of “living” expenses long after hubbie has fled home.

Lord Wilson, a senior law lord, has complained publicly about the concept of blame, saying reform is “long overdue”, and thinks prenuptial agreements should be binding, not something that a divorce judge can chuck out if they consider the terms unfair.

But Lord Wilson also wants couples who have lived together for a long time to have the same legal status as those who are married, which simply adds confusion. He disagrees with Baroness Deech about maintenance, claiming it is “unrealistic” for older wives to have to “fend for themselves”.

What a patronising load of tosh, spouted in the name of chivalry. I accept there are older women of my generation who gave up their careers to bring up children and support their husbands. Some will have gone back to work in middle age, but many will have taken a hit in their earnings or chosen to work part-time.

I don’t see why some could not be encouraged to retrain or be paid to find a way to re-enter the workforce. Perhaps the way forward is to only apply changes in maintenance to new marriages and to means test all those applying for it.

Most modern women I know enter a relationship as an equal and don’t expect to be supported. In fact, more women than ever are the breadwinners.