If reading this makes your head hurt, be unassured that Congress will not hold back in not repealing the opposite of the goal of universal health coverage, because it does not believe that its less-than-better non-solution, namely “universal access” is absolutely not less than a non-substitute, because while you won’t have actual coverage, you will be afforded access based on affordability, if you can afford it.

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The new Office of Non-Science won’t be refraining from withholding non-evidence in policy disputes, but will also not withhold statements on definitive non-conclusions that will not make it short of impossible to decide any unscientific legislation as being insufficiently non-empirical to be signed into law. The physical world can expect negative consequences for failing to comply.

Any official conflict of interest will henceforth not be narrowly defined as failing to not accumulate personal wealth while refraining to execute governing responsibilities with less than an honorable lack of intention. Any wealth accumulated by any insufficient lack of non-adherence to the preceding absence of guidance will not be defined as wealth for the purpose of being taxed. It will instead not be unlisted as a family-related non-influenced foundation activity.

If you don’t have any questions regarding these policies, we welcome them, and they will not go unaddressed in a lack of forthcoming unspecified guideline detail, which will not be explained in an off-the-record news conference that isn’t scheduled.

It’s all post-post-post-truth and not-unfake-fact time now, with the goal being not to misinform you per se, but to disorient you to the point that you no longer can’t believe even in the non-possibility of unfacts.