5. To Force Pardew Out Of The Club

"I would consider something like a director of football post. But I would do that for just one reason and that is to get myself back into full-time management. If I was a director of football and the manager was struggling and got the old tin-tack, I would tell them that I'd take over."

There's very little I can add to the many howls of derision that have been heard since last week's bizarre appointment. Yes, it's ridiculous. Yes, it's so typical of Newcastle and yes, it's hilarious to everyone outside the club. But it's not a joke. It's happening. When the club (finally) confirmed Kinnear's re-appointment yesterday - quashing the hope Kinnear had been somewhat mistaken - the fourth stage of grief set in. After Denial, Anger and Bargaining ("I'd give my right leg for the club to come out and deny it.") we have Depression. Well now comes the fifth stage: Acceptance. If Ashley's bizarre decisions have taught us anything it's that there is nothing we can do about it. So let's try and understand why he has really been appointed...Last season saw Pardew's stock fall quicker than Gareth Bale in a penalty area. Before Euro 2012 he was being touted by some (not many, but some) as a potential replacement for Capello at England. A year later and he's lucky to still have his job. His eight year contract seems to be the sticking point and the cause of a lot of confusion. Whilst effectively tying him to the club for eight years, there apparently exists a clause that enables Ashley to only pay out one year's worth of compensation should he be sacked. Only a few would know whether this clause actually exists. Whatever you think of Pardew, you must feel for him. It's like having your predecessor at your job be re-hired and to sit behind you all day, watching everything you do. Could you work under such circumstances, especially if you now have to report directly to this person instead of your actual boss? Maybe the one year clause doesn't exist and Ashley wants Pardew out - without paying any compensation, let alone six or seven year's worth. The notion that Kinnear will eventually replace Pardew is backed up by the man himself, who said the following in 2012