On the last episode of the strumpet legacy… There were gnomes, there was a new baby being pushed down the street in a pram during a snow storm.

Now Anoki decided seeing as it was raining to be smart and keep little Jessica inside, which surprises me that *HE* was the smart one in all this.

Lacie: I’m so bored… this baby smells….

Dat face…

So whilst smelling the flowers Jessica grew up into a toddler.

Lacie: Yay now we can clothe her and talk and she can walk and poop in a way that doesn’t affect me!

Woah now lady, you need to teach her.

Finally Lacie decided to take Jess on a stroll at a suitable time…

Lacie: Will you drop it…?

I’m surprised you haven’t dropped Jessica yet… oh snap.

The little one, all tuckered out from looking at things from her pram zonks out under her mobile.

Jess: ZZZZzzzzZZZZZ

Aww bless, she snores.

Anoki: We’re such good parents… I built a tree house for Jess… We should have sex in it.

Lacie: Bring a blanket… I don’t want splinters.

Lacie: Weeeeeeeee this is going to be so fun!!!

Anoki: I hope that ladder is sturdy enough to hold your weight…

Lacie: Say what now?!?!!?

Anoki: No I just meant because you’re an adult… ahhh come back, we’re still doing it, right?

Of course they were still doing it, I always wonder where they get those love heart confetti petal things though…

Anokie: la-la-lala-la *scatters petals*

Lacie: Everytime… SOMEONE HAS TO CLEAN THOSE, YOU ASS…



Anoki tries to smooth things over with his usual trick… it works.

The next day…

Lacie: I swear I can hear someone singing “Girl on fire”

So she looked out the window… that man was on fire…

Turns out when Lacie heard “this girl is on fiiyyyaaaahhh,” this man was actually yelling “help I’m on fiyyyaaahhhh”

Man: Oh god… oh no…. no, no, no… HOT!!!!

This is all that was left of the man.



Lacie: Ugh so rude to die on my lawn… Now your tombstone is here… great, oh hello DEATH… having a nice day, yeah take that spontaneously combusting jerk away.

Well, well, well Queen of hearts over here eh…

Lacie: Oh snap I’m pregnant!

Anoki: WOOOOO TREE BABY… I’M GONNA HAVE AN ENT!!!!!

Lacie: Oh seriously next time we conceive, it’s the bed or nothing…

Yeah, your man, is stupid….

So having said that we’re going to give him a make over…

Anoki: Ok but leave my pony tail…

Oh sure… but uh… close your eyes ok?

Anoki: Ok!



Lacie: Ohhh he looks soo goood!

Anoki: Can I open them now?

Yep…

Anoki: Damn I look go…. AHHH WHERE IS MY PONYTAIL? YOU SON OF A….

Hey quick look; a distraction…

Anoki: Where?

Your toddler grew into a child…

Yeah little Jess is now a young girl… um also she developed a complex and became evil(I totally blame Anoki for trying to make her an Eskimo.)

Her Simology thus far;

neurotic

brave

evil

likes geekrock

likes sushi

likes purple.

Stay tuned for the now shenanigans of Lacie, Anoki and the apparently evil Jessica Juan on the next episode of; The Strumpet Legacy!