Yaya Touré was the big winner at the 2016 Golden Yayas in London last night. For the fifth consecutive year, the Ivorian swept the board, winning in every single category during a star-studded gala.

The glitzy ceremony is organised each year by Dimitri Seluk, an agent who represents footballers such as Yaya Touré.

“Completely unexpected,” the City midfielder told Soccer on Sunday, before accusing organisers of disrespect for not acknowledging his forthcoming birthday this May.

The full list of winners…

Human of the Year (Yaya Touré)

Sexiest Human of all Time (Yaya Touré)

Humblest Genius (Yaya Touré)

The Jesus Award for Excellence (Yaya Touré)

Longest Penis (Yaya Touré)

Lifetime Achievement Award (Yaya Touré)

The Mandela Award for Surpassing Mandela (Yaya Touré)

Female Athlete of the Year (Yaya Touré)

Giantest Brain (Yaya Touré)

Kolo Touré of the Year (Yaya Touré)

Most Awards Award (Yaya Touré)

The four-time African Player of the Year has threatened not to return for next year’s Golden Yayas, if a rule forbidding winners from also coming runner-up isn’t abolished.