Plans have been announced for a runoff between all the candidates. Rather than ask the students who they want to represent the student body as Mr. and Ms. GT, however, the runoff's ballots will instead feature the question “Who do you feel least ambivalent about ‘representing’ Georgia Tech for entirely arbitrary reasons?” The Electoral Commission believes that this question should be enough to garner at least a partial fuck to break the deadlock.

*The official Electoral Commission ensures that the tallying of the student body's collective fucks given (or lack thereof) was carried out in accordance with the United Nations' standards for international electoral regulation.

Disclaimer: The above article is a work of satire. That mean's it's fictional for those of you who still don't know what the word "satire" means. The above views do not reflect those of Georgia Tech.