New UKIP leader Richard ‘Dick’ Braine has legally changed his name to Mike Oxlittle after becoming sick of the rampant jokes.

As soon as Richard Braine became the leader of UKIP, jokes came flooding in at the expense of his name.



‘I don’t think it’s very clever to treat people poorly over something they have no control over. Now let’s get back to blaming everything wrong with Britain on people with dark skin,’ said the former Braine.

The jokes got so much that Braine decided to legally change his name to something that no-one could make fun of.

‘I wanted a name that gave a real sense of who I am as a person. That’s why I went with Mike Oxlittle. Michael is a fine, upstanding Christian name while I’ve often been referred to as a little ox with how bullish I am,’ said the new Mike Oxlittle.

Everyone agrees that Mike Oxlittle is a strong name and cannot be poked fun at in any way whatsoever.