I'm currently living in Paris, the city where less than one month ago, some fanatics killed people because they were listening to music, watching a football match, or simply enjoying beers in a bar. I was living in the neighbourhood of where those tragic event happened. Now I'm scared.

I'm not scared of terrorists.

I'm scared of my own country.

I'm scared because France is in State of emergency for the next three months, meaning that a every hour of the day or night, some heavy armoured cops could break into my flat, without having to ask a judge about it.

I'm scared because my Interior's minister is conscientiously breaking the Constitution, and is now pushing to get some part of it rewritten. The same Constitution that is supposed to protect me from State abuses.

I'm scared because there are plans to combine State databases, like the social security one. I don't want the police to have access to my medical records! There are also plans to systematically embed GPS trackers into renting cars : what's the point of this, except violating privacy? Terrorist can just borrow/buy/steal one, I can't.

I'm scared because it seems that being an ecologist is enough to get house arrest. Some people protested, and the answer of the President was that there won't be more house arrest for militants. Instead of apologizing for this, and freeing the 24 people under this treatment. Before its 20th November's reform, this sentence was reserved to people "whose activity is dangerous", now it's "serious reason to believe that his behaviour constitutes a threat". This really sounds like thought crime.

I'm scared because every day I'm reading the dedicated webpage of la Quadrature du Net, horrified, afraid of finding names of friends in some articles.

I'm scared because my country, the one that wrote the Declaration of the Rights of Man and of the Citizen, informed the European Council that it might violate some parts of the European Convention on Human Rights.

I'm scared because my country refuses to answer questions on violent searches with a terse answer: "We don't comment on specific cases, searches are conducted in compliance with the law of the state of emergency and ministerial direction". What happened to the article R. 434-14 of Police code of ethics? The one saying that the Police is here to serve the population with courtesy and an exemplar behaviour, with respect of people's dignity.

I'm scared, because I remember my President saying that "France relentlessly fight against racism, anti-Semitism, Islamophobia", and it seems that this today, this declaration is forgotten.

I'm scared because we're the only country in Europe along with the United Kingdom to trample fundamental Freedoms after a terrorist attack : the Norway did not in 2011, nor did Spain in 2005. And I'm quite sure that I don't want France to look like UK. What about doing the exact opposite instead?

I'm scared because everyone here knows someone that knows someone that has been killed the 13th of November, enjoying a beer, attending a concert, and the government is instrumenting our sorrow as a justification for dropping bombs and violating the rule of law and democracy.

I'm scared because it seems to me that everyone is ok with the negation of basic human right, and afraid of difference: this is a dangerous combination that led to awful things in the past.

I'm scared because everyone seems to care more about the symptoms than for the origin of Daesh.

I'm scared because different is now starting to mean dangerous.

I'm scared because we have lost the war against terrorists : they are hating our decadence freedom (and maybe also the fact that we're bombing them) and want to enslave us, yet it seems that our own government is doing the work for them.

I'm scared because I'm just a nobody writing/deploying software to empower people: OTR, Tor and MAT to bring them privacy, and radare2 to let them regain control of their software ; and it seems that there are plans to make this illegal.

I'm scared.

All my sources for this article can be found on the impressive (in a bad way) webpage of the Quadrature du Net.