Kyrie Irving played only nine minutes in his team’s shockingly easy win over the Oklahoma City Thunder on Sunday, leaving early with what the team described as “flu-like symptoms.” After the Cleveland Cavaliers equally surprising loss to the Detroit Pistons 24 hours later, though, the flashy floor general set the record straight on his impromptu absence.

Was a stomach bug really what kept Irving from appearing in one of the biggest games of the regular season? Well, not exactly.

Asked how he was feeling following his team’s loss by Joe Vardon of the Northeast Ohio Media Group, the 23 year old responded thusly – in, believe it or not, what seems to be a completely serious manner.

I felt all right. Our team said I was out with flu-like symptoms. It was honestly from the bed bugs at the frickin Hilton that we stayed at. As you can see I got it at the top of my head, it’s just like bed bugs and I didn’t get any sleep. We came into the game, then I was freaked out, then I started feeling nauseous so it was just a whole bunch of BS honestly. Coming into today I got a lot of rest and felt better coming into today.

Yes, bed bugs prevented a three-time All-Star from playing even half of a nationally televised game against a potential NBA Finals opponent. The Oklahoma City Hilton obviously needs to call an exterminator – and preferably a very, very skilled one.

Irving, you may recall, played throughout last year’s playoffs on an incredibly fragile right knee that finally gave out during overtime of Game 1 of the Finals. He doesn’t exactly qualify as “soft,” basically, no matter your takeaway from this absolutely bizarre turn of events. Those bugs were just clearly from some other planet.

Irving, by the way, really did feel better on Monday than he did one day prior. He scored 30 points and doled-out five assists versus Detroit. But LeBron James struggled, shooting 5-of-18 from the floor en route to a measly 12 points. Might The King have been suffering from the affliction that plagued his superstar teammate? We’re not sure, but if those bugs were bad enough to keep Irving out of a game entirely, they’d likely be enough to negatively affect LeBron.

Right?