Listen, we all love the BRZ. It's light, it's cheap, it's rear-wheel-drive. But we want more. We've wanted more since our very first lap with the car, and we haven't been quiet about it. Instead, you gave us this:

The Special Edition BRZ Series.Blue.

PHOTOS: Subaru BRZ Wagon Concept

I'll give you a pass on the name. If you want the world to think you don't have a functional grasp on how a keyboard works while drawing parallels between your sports car and dandruff shampoo, that's your call. But I can't let the car slide.

You expect me to get excited about some painted wheels and a body kit? You think that's worth my time? Worse, you think it's worth your customers' money? Quit trolling us and drop a turbo in the engine bay.

We like low-power sports cars as much as the next goon, but few companies do turbo flat-fours like you. The WRX and STI twins pack the kind of gut-punching power that would turn the BRZ from a shoulda-bought-the-Miata to a just-ripped-your-Mustang's-face-off machine.

Why do you deny us? What's the motivation? I've heard the excuses. The EJ257 engine doesn't fit under the BRZ's low hood. OK, but the new WRX's turbo FA20 totally would. So maybe it would need a different exhaust manifold. So what? You have some of the world's best engineers at your disposal. Figure it out.

We're still waiting.

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