You’ll Never Find a Perfect Partner

You’ll only find someone who’s compatible with you.

You often daydream about being with the perfect partner who sends you love letters every day, sings to you, brings you flowers, and the two of you are dancing under the moon. Everything is perfect in that fantasy. You fantasize a perfect relationship with the perfect partner with zero flaws.

That’s what fantasy is for until reality hits.

You won’t find a perfect man or a woman. There is no “perfect” man or woman.

Unless we’re talking about Jesus.

Other than that, you won’t find a perfect partner.

But you can find a partner who’s a match for you.

Instead of thinking “My partner is perfect.”

Think: “My partner is compatible for me.”

It’s called matchmaking.

You are each other’s match.

I understand that your partner is perfect in your eyes, but your partner is not perfect to other people’s eyes. It’s fine. It’s what it is. Nothing wrong with that. What’s more beautiful is when your partner is imperfect and that’s what makes your partner perfect in your eyes.

The thing is, your partner has flaws just like you, just like any human being. Your partner is learning and evolving in life just like everybody else. Your partner is imperfect and that’s what made you fall in love with that person in the first place. That’s what made your partner fall in love with you in the first place: Two imperfect beings who are a compatible match for each other. It takes two imperfect beings to make a relationship perfect.

“If you are always trying to be normal (perfect), you will never know how amazing you can be.” ― Maya Angelou

It’s better to be with an imperfect person because you relate to that person more. You relate to the person’s failures, mistakes, struggles, painful past and goofy awkwardness. Someone who’s a little weird with a big heart.

In the end, what’s a “perfect” partner anyway? Let’s say everyone is perfect, but it doesn’t mean they’re a match for us when it comes to relationships.

If everyone in the world is perfect, then the world would be a boring place to be. You want to find a perfect partner, but ask yourself this:

Are you perfect yourself?

Probably not. You are just as imperfect as the “perfect” person you want to attract into your life. It’s not a bad thing. People relate to imperfect people more than perfect people. It’s other people’s imperfection that makes us feel we’re not alone in this world with our struggles and imperfections.

A relationship doesn’t always start off as perfect. There is no perfect relationship either because a relationship takes hard work, challenge, commitment and lots of sacrifices. Both of you have to go through arguments and fights so the relationship becomes easier with time. It’s these painful process that you get to know each other better and respect each other more with time. It takes hard work to make a relationship perfect for both of you.

Having a “perfect” partner won’t stimulate or inspire us. They are “too perfect”. Having an imperfect partner can stimulate, inspire and challenge us because that imperfect person sees the world in a different way, which you can learn from. Having a person like that in your life is perfect.

You expect to find a “picture-perfect” partner, but you may not deal with the imperfection from the person if you expect too much from a person. And deep inside, you’d rather want an imperfect person in your life. Having an imperfect person in your life makes your life brighter. It’s their goofy, weird side that brings out the best in them. Having an imperfect person brings out the best in you. An imperfect person wants to be yourself completely as you are.

Expecting your partner to be perfect will damage the great relationship between you two. Accepting your partner as imperfect will make the relationship stronger.

Yes, she forgot to buy toilet papers in the grocery. He farted in the middle of the night and woke you up. She has a bad hair day. He hasn’t shaved his beard for a month. Her belly became a little chubby. He watched the 1 new episode from a TV show without you. She came up with a weird joke that made no sense. He made a silly face when you caressed his cheek. She got a few pimples for a few days. He played video games for a month instead of working out daily in a short period.

Your partner is just being a relatable human being.

Don’t expect your partner to be perfect, because they won’t and it will only disappoint you more. Instead, find a partner with important traits such as loyalty, kindness, humility, generosity, empathy, intelligence, and a inner beauty.

A man who still finds you beautiful, even though you look like a mess with a big, morning hair while wearing sweatpants and T-shirt. A woman who still finds you handsome on days where you feel self-conscious. If your partner has all the good traits and a match to you, then you shouldn’t be concerned about their weird side. Your idea of a “perfect” partner stops to matter anymore because you’d rather have an imperfect partner who makes your life brighter and perfect.

We’re all weird and imperfect. And it makes us less lonely to know there are someone who’s as weird and flawed like us: That person is our soulmate.

This is an amazing quote:

“The little idiosyncrasies that only I know about: that’s what made her my wife. Oh, she had the goods on me too, she knew all my little peccadilloes. People call these things imperfections, but they’re not. Ah, that’s the good stuff!” — Robin Williams, Good Will Hunting.

There is someone out there who’s a compatible match to you. ❤