Mistakes from parents in trying to improve their children: The second and final part









(In the first installment of this article you were reviewed by 3 parent parenting errors, the second part contains brief tips on identifying and addressing the remaining 7 parenting mistakes)





Read the first part of this article





Mistake Four - The Madness of Being Your Kids' Best Friend





One parenting expert was once asked which of the biggest mistakes parents make during parenting, and they say that parents do not actually want to be parents and that they try to be best friends instead of taking drastic measures.





Every parent wants their children to love them, they want the kids to sing to them, but one thing that parents ignore is that the 'right training step' is usually what the kids like. Not come.





They will express their anger at every step of the way, but may also wish they were born into another family, remembering that the desire to be a best friend compels parents to surrender and to abandon all such activities. Are forced to make them cruel to the eyes of children, it is not love for children but you need and try to understand it.





Possible ways to avoid this error - adopt a 'moderate strategy' - ban where necessary, punish and talk about the facts of life. Make children empowered and decisive where there is no major harm to the child.





Fifth mistake - nurturing competition





The idea of ​​competition is created by seeing the children of others within all parents, any person who knows or exaggerates a good aspect of their child and we start the competition with our child.





In fact we do not trust our child but fear that 'our baby will be left behind'. Our mind 'traps' us that if we do not force our child, our child becomes a 'worthwhile person'. So in this case our thinking is that we want a winning set at all costs.





Possible way to avoid this error - Every child has 'certain' abilities, habits and traits, try to identify and develop them, gradually ending the habit of competing with the other child.





Holiday Mistakes - Forgetting the Golden Age of Childhood





Think of the golden age of childhood as a child rather than a 'parent', it is true that raising and raising young children can be very difficult and awkward, as it can be so physically and emotionally exhausting. We think that we wish they could grow up quickly so that our lives can be easier too.





At the same time, the pressure of future success is so much on our mind that even seeing them do these little things, our minds suffer, and in the meantime we quit 'living'.





Factors such as dressing children in a naughty way, smiling at them, smiling, flirting with fervor, stepping off from the sidewalk and listening to the story through unique bids become important to us and we They also end up with their childhood's 'golden age' and thus the stress of life goes away with the freshness, real happiness and tranquility of their childhood.





Remember that childhood is the name of sport and curiosity when we put the pressure of life on them, we are actually causing them to end their innocence, uneasiness and happiness.





Possible ways to avoid this mistake - We learn to live at least 10 small moments in children every day, think and play with them as a kid instead of putting the pressure of the future on them.





Mistake 7 - Trying to make the baby of your choice





As parents, we have many dreams about our children, but before we are born, we think about the future of our children. Our hidden desire is to become like us and wish they were a little And be smart and a little bit talented, but remember that children's dreams can be something else, and the color and lifespan of their lives can be completely contradictory to our thinking, so imposing our dreams on them is mostly a loss. Can cause





Possible way to avoid this mistake - Identify, match, provide directional training by nature, identify your child's true personality and influence his / her life. Are.





Eighth Mistake - Communication and Role Differentiation





Most parents are in contradiction with their role and by keeping this dualism constant we are putting children in double-mindedness, how parents face difficult situations, how to be rejected, to fail. How they act, how they deal with friends and strangers, and how parents interact with each other, children take note of all these things and learn from the same parenting process.





Possible way to avoid this mistake - One of the open secrets of making kids extraordinary is that we keep trying to become 'extraordinary'.





Ninth mistake - issuing decisions on other parents and their children





No matter how different our parenting style is from us, it is not our choice to issue judgment on them, no one is completely right or completely wrong in this world, we can all be a combination of good and evil.





Unless we are fully aware of other parents' internal circumstances, we cannot talk about their parenting, the circumstances, problems and problems of each household may be different, so it is disastrous for them to object or criticize other parents and their children. Whoever it may be.





Possible way to avoid this mistake - Make it a habit to understand someone and their personality, family situation and their problems before you make a mind about it.





Tenth Error - Neglecting Role and Scenery





If parents are allowed to develop just one and only thing in children, then of course, this should be the only role, namely the core attribute of us, the guiding light of our 'inner lamp', remember that a good report on character improvement exams. Cards are more important than trophies.





We consider role-playing in our children an additional task; parents think that their role will automatically be corrected as they grow up, but it is only the parents' misunderstanding, usually in the age group of 10 to 15 years. The role is of no importance at all, but it is the responsibility of the parents to protect their children from temporary benefits and to worry about making them better deal with people in the future and thinking positively about themselves.





Remember that the character, the confidence, the strength, and the strength to rise up again, can only come from the difficulties children face.





Possible ways of avoiding this mistake - Make your children's lists of life activities and issues divided into 3 types and the list should be on short-term, mid-term and long-term projects.





Now prioritize each task with its potential impact, focus less on short-term tasks, and focus more on long-term tasks, issues and issues.





True, it may be difficult to see your children temporarily fail, but sometimes it is important for parents to see that, there can be millions of ways to love children, and it is the parents' responsibility to help their children fall short. Let the trim go through the difficulties so that they can achieve long-term benefits.