About 12.8 percent of children under 18 have special health needs, according to the Department of Health and Human Services, and doctors’ appointments are almost always during the workday.

There’s evidence that the burden of this ongoing time crunch is borne mostly by mothers. According to the Pew Research Center, 42 percent of mothers said they have reduced their work hours because of care-taking responsibilities, compared with 28 percent of fathers, while 39 percent of mothers said they have taken “a significant amount of time” off from work because of caretaking, compared with 24 percent of fathers.

So what can be done to help ease this conflict? One answer is that companies can provide flexibility for all workers, when possible. If flexibility is only given to mothers, it breeds resentment, and it turns mothers into a specific category of worker that is seen as less dedicated.

“The best flex policies are reason-blind, which allows anyone with a caregiving need of any kind at any age to get their job done in the most productive way possible for their jobs in a culture that’s set up circa 1965,” said Lauren Smith Brody, an author and the founder of The Fifth Trimester, a consultancy that helps companies retain new mothers.

If you’re a parent who is asking an employer for a flexible working schedule, Ms. Brody suggests coming in with a couple of plans for how it will work and being able to explain to your boss why granting you flexibility is good for the company.

It shouldn’t just be a one-time ask for flexibility, either — it should be an ongoing conversation with regular check-ins. “That way it’s a more natural part of your growth as an employee,” and won’t just be seen as your dialing back, said Ms. Brody.

I feel lucky that I have the flexibility to attend these middle-of-the-afternoon first-grade readings of “Aladdin and the Magic Pickle Jar” without worrying about retaliation from my employer. The ability to show up for your children matters — it matters deeply to your children, and it matters for you. It should matter to your employers, too.