Conservatives are having a field day “sticking it” to liberals about the weather. They have no time for scientific theories like “Arctic amplification,” which only perfectly models how general warming trends can lead to increasingly severe cold snaps. After all, like evolution, Arctic amplification is “just a theory.”

The common refrain, in light of the “polar vortex” sweeping the country, reads a little something — and just about as intelligently — as this:

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If you believe in global warming your an idiot — andrew fitzgerald (@ajfitzzz) January 6, 2014

So what happen to global warming?? — Donna Klimowicz (@housesdelaware) January 6, 2014

Even fictional antagonists, like “Shooter McGavin” from Adam Sandler’s magnum opus Happy Gilmore, are declaring global warming a dead issue:

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BREAKING: Books on Global Warming being pulled from shelves today. — Shooter McGavin (@ShooterMcGavin_) January 6, 2014

Some conservatives are, however, attempting to take the high road:

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@ToddCaddie @ESPNCaddie Come on TM, they now call it Climate Change since global warming has been proven false… — Kyle Watson (@caddieKdub) January 6, 2014

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Of course, they fail to realize that they’re talking not about the underlying theory, but what it’s called in the popular press. Declaring that a theory’s “named wrong” doesn’t disprove it any more than the fact that the Obamacare website launch was a disaster “proves” that the Affordable Care Act will destroy America.

Given that the “polar vortex” engulfing the nation sounds like a plan masterminded by a mustache-twirling evil genius, the story requires a villain, and conservatives have found theirs:

Global warming my ass, Al Gore can suck one — Mikey T (@MikeTreinen) January 6, 2014

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hey Al Gore where u at with your global warming bs?! too busy sleeping with youre Nobel Peas Price?? #Unbelievable — Derek Grzeskowiak (@d_REk13) January 6, 2014

got to work it was almost 50 now it's 36 and snowing. Once again, thanks a lot Al Gore. You and your global warming nonsense and manbearpig — platypus billed duck (@woodcore22) January 6, 2014

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The larger conservative outlets are following suit, refusing to acknowledge that cold weather could be a cascade effect of global warming. For example, Red State‘s Erick Erickson designed what looks to him like a scientific study:

The difference between people who believe in the 2nd coming of Jesus and those who believe in global warming is that Jesus will return. — Erick Erickson (@EWErickson) January 2, 2014

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Rush Limbaugh, of course, just thinks liberals are making it all up:

RUSH LIMBAUGH: The media creating 'Polar Vortex' to try and blame 'cold' on global warming http://t.co/1Hw8eCmlK2 — The Right Scoop (@TheRightScoop) January 6, 2014

Conservative radio host Bryan Fischer has issued a series of “catastrophic global warming alerts”:

Catastrophic global warming alert: all schools in Chicago closed today. Wind chill of -45. http://t.co/kiFyV7T8OW — Bryan Fischer (@BryanJFischer) January 6, 2014

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Catastrophic global warming alert: so cold in Canada, getting "frost quakes." Sound like gunfire. http://t.co/z5bj5mVXDk — Bryan Fischer (@BryanJFischer) January 6, 2014

But, of course, reason should win out in the end:

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If you think snow disproves global warming, I'm going to assume you think jumping disproves gravity. — Grand Old Parody (@GrandOldParody1) January 6, 2014

Re: global warming and the cold weather "Liberals keep telling me the Titanic is sinking but my side of the ship is 500 feet in the air." — justine (@nerdyjewishgirl) January 4, 2014

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Some liberals are, however, incapable of responding to rightwing stupidity on the subject anymore:

I’m fed up with answering about warming & all that cold+ snowstorm RT @ClimateDesk #Newsflash: Weather isn't climate http://t.co/AatepalUla — Sergio Abranches (@abranches) January 6, 2014

[Image via AFP]