Did You Just Say Make My Own Salad?

The woes of a student trying to eat lunch

I don’t really understand this do-it-yourself attitude that has become the style of today’s lunch shop owner. If I wanted to do it myself I’d go to the grocery store, buy the supplies and literally do it myself. Is labor that expensive that you can’t get someone to help me? Do I look like a fucking sandwich artist or salad tosser?

I go to grad school in SF for Business and my school is located in the financial district near Levi’s plaza, there just isn’t a lot of food options around there except for this market. This market has the unreasonable grandeur to offer make-your-own salad. I don’t think I have ever made a good salad there. First of all, there are way too many options. My immature eyes desire every item there and before Iknow it my salad is like 11 pounds and $30. Better yet, it tastes horrible because cauliflower doesn’t go well with bacon bits, pickles and hot peppers. This may sound insane but I seriously need more guidance than that. Lunch is supposed to be a break from working but now I’m frantically trying to figure out what the hell I’m going to put in my salad and not hate it or overpay for it.

Worst of all is the dressing. I’ve probably made 50 salads since I moved out here and i still can’t figure out how much dressing to put on these damn salads. Half the time its way to little and is just a vegetable medley and the other half the time it is literally soup. And who the hell wants thousand island soup? Seriously, it sounds good but its not. So there goes my $12 and my appetite for an hour.

Some people are just born without the ability to make their own salad, me being one of them is writing this to shop owners everywhere begging for some help. Please offer already made salads! ill pay $12 i swear!