An interesting feature of the endless debate about Brexit. Practically everyone seems to agree that Theresa May’s position on Brexit is wrong. They just can’t agree on what that position is.

At Prime Minister’s Questions today, Tulip Siddiq (Lab, Hampstead & Kilburn) was in no doubt. Mrs May, she howled, was “in hot pursuit of a hard Brexit”.

According to Ms Siddiq’s own leader, however, Mrs May wasn’t in hot pursuit of anything – because she didn’t know what she wanted from Brexit. “All we’ve had,” snorted Jeremy Corbyn, “is waffle and empty rhetoric.” He also quoted Lord Bridges, the Tory peer who’d said Britain would be walking “a gangplank into thin air” if Mrs May didn’t make up her mind.

Yet, at almost exactly the same time on Twitter, Patrick O’Flynn – a Ukip MEP – was protesting against the Government’s “outrageous” attempt to “plot a permanent ‘transition’”. According to him, therefore, Mrs May is planning the softest Brexit possible.

His party’s interim leader, Gerard Batten, put it even more bluntly. “Closet Remainers such as May,” he glowered, “will delay and impede Brexit in the hope of later overturning the democratic wishes of the people.”

So there you have it. Within the space of mere minutes, we learnt that Theresa May is hellbent on a hard Brexit, hellbent on a soft Brexit, hellbent on stopping Brexit altogether, and completely undecided about the whole thing.