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The 5th House is an area that some don’t take seriously, especially when it comes to relationships. It doesn’t involve the commitment of the 7th, the intensity of the 8th, or the 12th’s promise of a soulmate connection. People see the 5th as a house of lighthearted romance, flirtation and children. Kid’s stuff, not adult relationships. But when it’s emphasized in the natal chart, its impact on the love life will be just as significant as the heavy-duty houses.

It’s true that the 5th is about fun, but it’s also the house of self-expression. That rush of possibility you get in the early stages of a relationship is 5th House energy. The giddy high of being around your beloved, the suspension of common sense — all 5th House territory. But so is the need to show the world what you can do, and what you’ve created. This is the house of the artist and performer. It represents the children you create, and the child inside of you that never grows up. Think about kids, and their naturally uninhibited self-expression (ego); that’s the essence of the 5th House. If you have relationship planets in this house, these energies will be essential components of your partnerships. Let’s look at some examples.

5th House Moon

Kelly has a 5th House Moon. She needs (Moon) to feel special, and to keep that sense of excitement continually nurtured in her romantic relationships. This may not be obvious right away (the Moon is internal energy), but a partnership that doesn’t make her feel proud will eventually leave her feeling deprived. When she expresses her feelings to her lover, there will be a touch of the Drama Queen happening. She may have children, or she may find another outlet for her creative energy. But it’s essential that her relationships support her purpose (whatever that may be), and have a sprinkle of gold dust to keep the magic alive.

Much will depend on what sign her Moon is in, but even if it’s in controlled Capricorn, all of the above will be true (to some extent). For example, her Capricorn Moon may put the emphasis on status. If her partner buys her a tasteful (but obviously expensive) necklace, this will make her feel good when she shows it off. She’ll want to express her feelings in a controlled manner, but on a public level (the quiet exhibitionist). Any planet in the 5th House is not going to be happy if it doesn’t go public, at some point.

5th House Venus

[ad]Max’s Venus is in his 5th House. He’s looking for a playmate, someone he can kick back with, and maybe get into a bit of trouble with. He’s self-indulgent, and wants a partner who appreciates this. Bonus points if she’s got a unique sense of style and a certain “something” that sets her apart.

Venus also represents how Max expresses his love and affection. If this planet is in spontaneous Aries, it suggests that when he’s attracted to a woman, he’ll let her know immediately (even if he’s involved with someone else). Consequences and responsibilities are not part of the 5th House. Depending on the rest of Max’s chart, when he sees a woman he wants, he might be like a kid in a candy store. Settling down to a routine relationship could be difficult, unless he finds a partner who continually challenges (Aries) him with her own bright light.

5th House Mars

Jim’s Mars (energy and sexuality) is in his 5th House. He has a “look at me” vibe going on when he pursues someone. He wants his actions (Mars) to be noticed. But what if his Mars is in cautious Cancer? He still wants be noticed, but it will be for how he nurtures his lover (playfully, but full on). Here’s a man who wants the world to know that he will look after his mate. Of course, this energy can swing in the other direction; depending on how Jim got his needs met as a child, he could express himself by becoming the neediest and most demanding of lovers.

Let’s include an outer planet in the mix. If we give Jim a Mars/Neptune conjunction (in 5th House Cancer), he may become fixated on pursuing (Mars) the fantasy (Neptune) of a dream relationship. He may constantly tread water in the possibilities of a new relationship, only to become disillusioned when it goes deeper. Or he may drown himself in sexual escapism, searching for some elusive (Neptune) vision of comfort (Cancer). The 5th House is where we play, but the danger is in allowing play to become all there is.

If you have relationship planets (or the ruler of your 7th) in the 5th House, part of you is instinctively tuned into fun, romance and creative self-expression. While too much play can undermine the possibilities of a deeper connection, these things are important to you — and they are an important part of any relationship you’re in. Don’t deny them. And be cautious of any partner who tries to shut down these energies in you.

Related: Sex Changes Everything: The 5th and 8th Houses of Astrology

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