The internet world exploded earlier this month when South Carolina mega-pastor Perry Noble informed his attendees that the Ten Commandments are not commandments after all but promises. Noble gleaned this insight not from a careful study of the Scriptures - he admits that he did not do that - but from a conversation with a Jewish taxi driver. There are a number of reasons to be upset about this. For one thing, in order to redefine the law of God one must first assume the prerogatives of deity, something that Noble seems to have assumed due to his godlike celebrity status. Second, it brings us to near despair about the Christian culture today when the most popular preachers are those who admit that they are both untrained and irresponsible in handling the Scriptures. Third, the claim that the Ten Commandments are not, well, commandments is not only rebutted by a 30 second Bible software search (see Dt. 4:2; 4:40; 5:10 just for starters, not to mention Jesus' description in Mt. 5:19 and 19:17) but provides one more instance of a narcissistic age recasting the message of the church. With these things in mind, I cheerfully add my voice to the chorus denouncing Noble's teaching and urging all sane believers to leave their nearby emotion-driven mega-worship-center as soon as possible and start attending an actual church, preferably a Reformed one.