Anti-establishment crusader demands top job because of who he knows

Anti-establishment ‘man of the people’ Nigel Farage says it is outrageous the government won’t give him a job just because of who he knows.

The tireless crusader of the little man insisted he was the best person for the top job of handling US relations because he now knows where Donald Trump lives.

Farage told reporters, “The establishment needs shaking up, and the way to do that is by giving me a terrific ambassadorial role based purely on someone I’ve met twice, rather than finding the best person for the job.

“Giving jobs to the best-qualified candidate is typical of the outdated elitists that this country no longer respects.

“What the real people of this country want is to see their politicians being given the top jobs based purely on who their mates are.”

Voter Simon Williams told us, “Nigel Farage is that bloke down the pub watching the football. The one who reckons he had ‘trials’ and would have scored a hat-trick if he’d been presented with the chances missed today.

“Fortunately, everyone knows he’s full of shit.”