"Must everyone open and shut doors so incredibly noisily around here?!"

"I see you're free of time, as usual. Can't imagine what work life would be for your kind of folk."

"...two barrels of molasses, plus -- Oh, nevermind that, you're here. Here's your money."

"What does a man have to do to be left alone in this place? Go bugger someone less busy!"

"You again? Suppose you want more money!?"

"Yes, yes, yes! -- I'll give you your share in just a moment. I'd think you to be a bit more patient, what with me doing all the work and all." When Merchant is present: "I just came from <name of Merchant>'s. He wanted to know if I took credit cards." When Arms Dealer is present: "Go tell <name of Arms Dealer> to stop offering to pay me with ammo, I don't even own a gun." When Dryad is present: "Tried to get <name of Dryad> to pay me with favors once, now I have fungus growing in strange places." When Demolitionist is present: "Why don't YOU try collecting money from <name of Demolitionist> and not lose a hand or foot or..." During Rain : "Humbug! Someone tried to tell me they saw a fish walking on land. Who do they take ME for?!"

"Why can't it be raining gold coins!? Water is everywhere! Bah, how useless!" During a Thunderstorm : "A marvelous storm! A remarkable storm!"

"I am as giddy as a drunken man! I love this weather!" During a Windy Day : "Just because your house blows down, doesn't mean you stop paying taxes!"

"Bah! If this wind keeps up, people will lose their precious possessions and stop paying me!" When in a Graveyard : "Death and taxes, nothing more sure in life than that!"

"The people here aren't paying up! They are better off dead! Oh, perhaps they already are." When the player clicks "Collect" and money is collected: "Here's your cut of the taxes that I've taken from our surplus population!"

"Here you are again, taking all my coin! Just grab it and begone from my sight!"

"Bah! Here, take your shillings and get out of my sight!"

"This is all you're gonna get for now, not a penny more! Take it and spend it wisely." When the player clicks "Collect" and there is no money to be collected: "...And people call me greedy? No, I have nothing else for you."

"Oh, so you just see me as a coin sign, eh? 'Cus every time you see me, you ask me."

"Don't you ever stop just to say 'Hi?'"

"Bah! You again? You just grabbed some of my coin just moments ago, so bugger off and come back later!"

"I just gave you half a crown five minutes ago! Scram!"

"Reaching into my moneybags again already!? And you call ME greedy."

"You just received your pay, and not a farthing more! Get out!"

"Money doesn't grow on trees, so don't overpick my fruit! Bah!"

"You already managed to spend every pence I paid you!? Bah, I'm not a charity, go kill a slime!"

"Not so fast! You got your money, now begone!"

"Begging so soon?! Don't look at me like I'll have a change of heart overnight!"