If it were not for the gods of road cycling and traffic lights being steadfastly against me, I believe that I could get at least a kilometer of downhill momentum out of that hill on Lansdowne.

Alas, they are most definitely against me.

At least, it seems that way.

The wind that seemed to change direction so that it was pushing against me every time I changed direction is one thing. I can deal with that— my legs are getting pretty strong.

At the top of the hill on Lansdowne, I looked down the stretch of road and saw that my arch nemesis… I mean the traffic light… was red. It’s usually green when I approach the hill. It only turns red when I’m halfway down, so that I have to practically slam on my brakes to avoid colliding with a car, as if the gods of traffic lights are playing some kind of cruel joke.

Well, this is different, I thought to myself.

Could it be? Would it turn green by the time I got down there?

It sure did.

I smiled!

I cheered!

I screamed “Dobby is a free bike!”

I whooped! I hollered in pure joy!

…alas, my moment of glory was short-lived.

As I neared the traffic light, and it turned that astoundingly beautiful shade of green… some jerk-face in a car at the head of the line decided to make a right-hand turn from the left hand turning lane. IT… I say ‘it’ because that kind of jerk-faced behaviour doesn’t deserve the respect of a gender-specific pronoun… made the traffic into a confused mass.

From a car passenger’s point of view, it must have been interesting to watch a crazed woman bring her bike to a screeching halt, raise her left hand and foot, extend her middle finger and unseen middle toe and wave them furiously in the general direction of someone up front. Sure, no-one could see the extended middle toe, but the thought was there. I was aiming my middle toe at that jerk-face driver with all my fury behind it.

Between the gods, I think the conversation went like this:

Traffic Lights: “I’m going to let the poor woman have this one.”

Road Cycling: “Yeah, I’ll keep the traffic flowing and let her go… PSYCH! Douche driver for the win!”