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Anyway, the most famous line from Love Story is the phrase "Love means never having to say you're sorry," which is actually said twice in the film. The first time by Jennifer (the poor but feisty girl) to Oliver (the rich but kind boy) after he tries to apologize for losing his temper. Later in the film, after she dies (because that's what lovers in shitty love story movies do), Oliver says it to his father (the rich ogre), who apologizes for not approving of his son's relationship.

I get it. Jenny taught Oliver something. Point made. But what did she teach him? I don't know. We could argue and debate what exactly that means, but I'm not going to. Maybe it means if you're in love the person you're with knows your heart and doesn't sweat the small stuff. Maybe it means love is having no regrets, as in never being sorry for being in love, but that's stupid, because the phrase is said in the context of apologies that have nothing to do with that. I'm not sure. Neither are you. Neither is my boss, Jack O'Brien. I asked him, too. No one knows. (Although Jack did send me a note that read, "Love is not having to answer your stupid questions, loser," which I think was a bit harsh.) But I tell you what: If you have strong opinions on the phrase, write your best guess in the comments and then delete that comment. This is the Internet. There's no capacity for that level of comprehension. We only understand things with graphical rating systems.

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So how good is "Love means never having to say you're sorry" as a definition of love?

Definition of Love Rating: