I would watch Most Extreme News Network. I’m assuming the format is them mentioning a top level piece of news, basically just the headline. Nothing in depth. Then they make a bunch of bad puns and tangentially related goofy comments.

I’m not 100% sure that what Suzie is saying totally makes sense, but I figure her exuberance is part of her charm.

Deus not knowing how to use PowerPoint is a lot funnier to me than it should be, just because he’s supposed to be pretty smart, and PowerPoint is some basic ass software.

Thinking about exporting our entertainment to the universe, pornographic or otherwise, I’ve come to the conclusion that it would radically change the economy of Earth. Imagine if someone made a movie here on Earth that cost $200 million to make, and after international ticket sales were accounted for, it nets a billion dollars. Now imagine that there are 5,000 other worlds the studio could sell that movie to. So, okay, let’s be conservative and say only 1,000 of those worlds really do gangbuster sales, because we’re talking about aliens and The Titanic, or Avatar, or Airplane III may not land culturally with every species. So 1,000 new worlds of audiences with comparable populations and desire for entertainment, etc.

That would be a trillion dollars in revenue… okay, minus a few bucks for advertising. But still, that’s one movie. Studios with 80 years of back catalog would become economic superpowers with more clout that all the world governments combined, and it would happen practically overnight.

Independent authors could knock out a book, what, it only sold 1,000 copies on Amazon? Guess what, it sold one million copies on Galamazon, and at $2.50 net revenue per copy, they’d be set for life. And that’s for a book that sold pretty poorly by local standards. Stephen King would be able to buy Saudi Arabia just to use as a place to keep all the rest of his money.

Seriously, if the galactic appetite for human porn was at that same level, every webcam girl would be able to retire comfortably after six months of weekly shows.

I’m telling you, the world economy would shift dramatically and rapidly. Of course, we’d probably have a massive trade deficit for a while. Even if we couldn’t get our hands on the latest portable holodeck gameboy gadgets and other sorts of tech, our own consumption of alien media would be completely nuts for decades to come. I mean, imagine if there was a show like Red Dwarf or Star Trek that were literal documentaries because spaceships were fucking real. Ice Road Truckers, except its… well, Planet Express.

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