Neural network-generated roller derby names

Or, this neural network is terrible at puns.



There’s a contact roller skate sport called roller derby where participants tend to use pseudonyms when they play. There are online databases of derby names so players can make sure their chosen name hasn’t been taken. Derby names are often mock-violent and/or sexy, but their most distinguishing feature is that most are based on puns. (The Wikipedia page has examples with the puns excruciatingly explained)

I learned all this when Lauren Barmore (aka Z Machine) sent me the full dataset of names from twoevils.org and derbyrollcall.com. She was one of several people who suggested I train a neural network on derby names. As with craft beers, coming up with a unique but clever name has become a challenge (there were more than 66k in the dataset she sent me), and she wondered if a neural network would be able to help generate new names.

The neural networks I train learn by example, and are good at mimicking the sounds and rhythms and common words of their input datasets (here, I used textgenrnn). With the derby names, it was the best at the “violence” category, although it sometimes forgot about the “playful” part.

Blood-Slug

Shady Bruise

Miss Carnage

Darth Death

Spank Bomb

Vicious Killer

Lil Hunter

Fun Stabs

Pain Pain

The Danger

Boom Storm

Princess Damage

Shredda Gore

Fatal Strike

Gore Storm

Bruise Bruiser

Rage Hatchet

Battle of Bop

Destroyer Smash

JoJo The Murder

Zog Mangler

Bonnie Skullmall

Princess Morgue

Hey Pain

Bear Rage

Danger Boom Box

The Fight Eye Command

Screaming Boom Chaos

Most of the time, I couldn’t tell what category it was going for. At least these names aren’t taken.

The Comma

Rude Professor

Lox O'Horror

Mayhem Chicken

Triple Cookie

Snow Warn

Badger Bambi

Eat-A-Skate

Moon Mage

Bruised Toast

Show Cat Emma

Sand Chaos

Hubbles

Lil Panter

Duck Chains

Shell Piper

Secret Booty

Cat Hand Stomps

Scream Ass Ele

Strawberry Pusher

Butter Mack Dash

Rumble Floobie

Sauce Bang Whip Short

Maim Shellbull

Damage Bunny

Farm Slayer

Pug Mile

Peach Atom

Bog Quad

It The Skater

Slurrs. Buggg

The Fusty Eyes

Flubblestrack

Nurfie Boops of Jenni

Morgunn Grace Shrimp

It also generated some horrible names I would not recommend. (Unless, perhaps, you are a bombardier beetle.) These are the printable ones.

Butty Destroy

Anus Attack

Booty Butter

Colon Boom Skillz

Bud Crack

Hell Poo

Drop Nightmare Lump

You’ll notice I have not gotten to the largest category of derby names: the puns. It turns out this neural network does not understand puns AT ALL, and it’s incredibly painful when it tries.

Kim Stroyer

Mary Splockings

Ikra B. Up

Aana Dastrophe

Burning Sweet C. Bang

Lucious Ally Mo

Alotiboot

Cheesella

Anita WreckPIED

Miss A. It Menace

Ace ‘N’ Hardy

Pan De Lucious

Pitty Tea N. Little

Shota Monster

Dizard Danky Maul

Frankin De Fight

Silence Stroye

La Vandastrophe

Harry Stabble

Sugar & Stranger

Slamm-Tonic

It’s positively weird. They’re pun-shaped objects that contain no actual puns. Occasionally one of its puns alllmost works and I think that’s somehow even worse.

Prince Slam Lot

Booty Count Dawn

Pain Ferri

Punchlime

Boot Skateer

The Sweet Roll

Bone Damned Killer

Strongulate

It also tried to do the “sexy” category, but it was pretty bad at it. From what I can tell, text-generating neural networks do not understand what humans find sexy. Again, these are the printable ones.

Body Sparkly

Death Hot Sporty

Darth Sugar

Sanderwear

Rotten Sassy

Booty-Slammer Big

Mighty Danger Sass

Dirty Scream!

For the UNprintable ones, as well as a huge list of >500 unsorted derby names (most of which are terrible not-puns), enter your email here.