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We're big Doctor Who fans, but let's not go crazy - it's not perfect, and for every solid gold classic in the series' long history, there's a liquid brown mess. That's part of the definable magic of the show!

So here's our pick of the 9 worst stories in the entire history of the Doctor Who franchise:

9. The Day Of The Doctor

The 11th Doctor Who celebrates his 60th birthday party. But doesn't he look tired?

(Image: BBC)

Whilst it's very impressive that Doctor Who has now been running for over 6 decades (Star Trek is the only sci-fi franchise that's been going longer), we don't think 2 hours of self-congratulatory nonsense was necessary.

And was it really appropriate for a public broadcaster to insinuate that Doctor Who deflowered Queen Elizabeth?

We can understand why Christopher Eccleston only agreed to return on the condition that he be almost unrecognisable under his heavy aging make-up.

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8. The Pyramids On Mars

The 3rd Doctor Who fights stuntmen wrapped in toilet roll.

If you thought the Daleks were ridiculous, wait until you see this 1970s' story's bad guys: the 'Egyptians', aliens who apparently like to wrap their dead up in old rags, then bury them under giant pyramids.

Ludicrous rubbish from a show that once claimed to be educational.

7. The Girl In The Fireplace

The 10th Doctor Who uses a magic fireplace to groom a child.

(Image: BBC)

We're not sure quite what was going through the writer's head with this one, but watching David Tennant woo a French Queen by using a time portal to meddle with her childhood makes for, at best, deeply uncomfortable viewing.

Series creator William Hartnell must have been turning in his grave.

And we haven't even talked about the sub-plot about robots, a predictably dull anti-Thatcherite parable.

6. The Demons

The 4th Doctor Who fights Satan on the village green.

Doctor Who may have been trapped on Earth by the penny-pinching BBC, but did he really need to be subjected to 6 episodes of morris dancing, where the day is saved by companion Jo Grant flashing her pants at Old Saint Nick himself?

Worst of all: the patient viewer is expected not to notice that the evil vicar is played by Roger Delgado, the same actor who'd played Doctor Who's nemesis the Master in about 10 other stories made the same year! Laughable.

5. Human Nature

The 10th Doctor Who becomes human so he can hide from scarecrows.

(Image: BBC)

Someone must have been annoyed that their dull anti-Thatcher parable about a boy's school on the eve of the Second World War didn't get commissioned, so decided to recycle it into a Doctor Who script.

The 'thrilling' plot sees Doctor Who transformed into an ordinary maths teacher, which involves David Tennant attempting a terrible posh English accent (though it's not as bad as the 'Scottish' accent he so often affects in other roles). Yawn!

4. City Of Death

The 4th Doctor Who goes on a jolly to Paris on the licence fee-payers' money.

One of a handful of terrible episodes contributed by boring students' favourite writer Douglas Adams, of Hitch-hiker's Guide Of The Galaxy fame, this mainly appears to have been commissioned to allow the production team a holiday.

We can only assume that its reputation rests on perverts enjoying the Doctor's assistant Romana (Mary Tamm) being dressed up like a school girl for the duration.

3. Caves Of Androzani

The 5th Doctor Who wanders aimlessly around a mine full of robots, then dies.

This dull anti-Thatcherite parable is only livened up by a) how entertainingly poor the costume for the inexplicable space dragon is, and b) companion Nicola Bryant's endlessly amusing attempt at an 'Australian' accent.

Neither are enough to hold the interest for 4 episodes, and we assume Peter Davison demanded to be killed off at the end out of sheer boredom.

2. Blink

More like STINK - the 10th Doctor Who can't even be bothered to turn up to work.

And how they thought they could get away with an episode where garden statues were the bad guys we have no idea.

Will it be gnomes next?

We're not surprised that David Tennant refused to appear. The only good thing about this rubbish is that it apparently killed the career of the awful guest star, Casey Mulligan, who doesn't even have a page on IMDB!

1. Genesis Of The Daleks

The 4th Doctor Who meets the Dalek Babies.

This dull anti-Thatcherite parable ruined Doctor Who's best baddies forever: they were the mutated children of an angry old man who lives in a bin, like a sort of cyborg Oscar The Grouch.

We suppose fans of 'Allo 'Allo! may enjoy his Space Nazi henchmen.

Someone go back in time and prevent the genesis of this rubbish.