Totally not bitter

Totally not bitter

Okay, the interview with Mitt and Ann Romney, airing this weekend on Fox News Sunday, is promising to be the best Republican tragicomedy since Marco Rubio's Gulp Heard 'Round the World. Or that time Clint Eastwood lost a debate to an empty chair. Or ... well, take your pick.

Here's another fun sneak peak of Mitt's big comeback:



Romney criticized Obama for being caught off guard by the sequestration deadline and for "berating" Republicans during the budget debate. "Well, no one can think that's been a success for the President. He didn't think the sequester would happen. It is happening," Romney said. "But to date, what we've seen is the President out campaigning to the American people, doing rallies around the country, flying around the country, and berating Republicans. And blaming and pointing. Now what does that do? That causes the Republicans to retrench and then put up a wall and fight back. It's a very natural human emotion."

Erm, uh, okay. The Republicans are again playing chicken with the president—and, oh yeah, the whole country—because Obama goes to rallies and says mean things about Republicans. Oh, the horror! It's not that Republicans want to see programs like, say, Meals on Wheels, get cut—it's just that mean ol' Obama has hurt their delicate little feelings, and deciding to screw over the whole country is simply a "natural human emotion." And if there's anyone who understands natural human emotions, it's definitely the guy who tried to connect with voters by insulting their local baked goods and telling "humorous" stories about that time his dad fired a bunch of people.

Oh, and going on TV to whine about how mean the guy who just kicked your ass in an election is doesn't make you look like a sore loser at all. Just ask John "still licking his wounds from four years ago" McCain.