Lesson Learned

When your child announces that he's going to bounce to the Moon, don't tell him this story. Just smile, nod and pat his sweet little head.

Once upon a time there were two brothers, Lucius and Todd. When they were little, they both had big dreams. Lucius dreamed of digging his way to China, and Todd dreamed of jumping to the Moon.

As with many siblings, they were both very competitive. They both also really enjoyed mochi, the delicious rice Japanese treat. So they made a bet that the first one to realize their dream would get to eat the remaining piece of mochi.

Lucius got to work right away. Since he didn't have a shovel, he used a soup ladle to dig. By the afternoon, he had dug a 12-foot hole.

Todd knew that if he was going to beat Lucius, he'd have to invent something really cool like Moon Shoes. He came up with the idea to build mini trampolines for his feet with adjustable VELCRO easy-close fasteners and self-centering shoe platforms with nonskid grip surfaces. But while his Moon Shoes did result in a fun, anti-gravity effect, he was nowhere near close to actually reaching the Moon.

Not long after Todd had sat down on the curb and conceded defeat, Lucius emerged from his hole, exhausted and covered in dirt, but nowhere near close to actually reaching China. The brothers shook hands and decided that, since neither of them had won, neither of them had lost, and so they would share the remaining piece of mochi.

But when the brothers went to retrieve the mochi from the kitchen, they discovered that their cat, Gravy, had eaten the last piece.

There's a moral to this story, kids. And that is, cats are total b-holes.

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