Books about Death, Dying and Grieving that inspire us

A list from Mylestoned — Part I

While we work hard to build, refine and perfect what we’re doing at Mylestoned we have (a little) downtime to read. The following is a list of books and authors that continue to inspire us to this day.

Being Mortal by Atul Gawande

Being Mortal shows that the ultimate goal is not a good death but a good life — all the way to the very end.

The first book I picked up as I began my journey with the team here and one that hasn’t left my side since. Sometimes sad. Sometimes funny. Always informative and an important read focused on the “Talk” that we should be having when we face the inevitable.

On a personal note seeing my father pass away in hospice and not having this talk is something I still regret to this day. Not to mention other relatives that I’ve seen pass away over the past ten years.

H is for Hawk by Helen MacDonald

And Your Bird Can Sing

I was skeptical of this one. A book about a woman who takes a break from the human focused world after the death of her beloved father. During this retreat she turns to a notoriously difficult to train young goshawk as a way to distract from the grieving process.

On paper it doesn’t sound like it should work. Spoiler — it works. It works beautifully. MacDonald and the hawk take a journey together around growth, missteps, growth again, more missteps and moving forward. A must read.

Mortality by Christopher Hitchens

Hitch!!!

I’m a BIG fan of Hitch’s writing. Yes he can be an a#*hole. Yes he can be controversial. But, his writing is just about as good as it gets. Before we go any further, just check out his pieces in The Atlantic over the past ten years or so. SO GOOD.

In regards to Mortality. A collection of essays that are “an analysis of Nietzsche’s proclamation that “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger,” the joy of conversation and the very meaning of life.”

Sure it’s morbid, but it’s the story of how one man confronts his own mortality told through one of the best non-fiction writers of the past fifty years.

“To the dumb question “Why me?” the cosmos barely bothers to return the reply: why not?”

Watership Down by Richard Adams

“Isn’t this a kids book?” Well I guess it, technically, is, but it’s one of the 1st books I can remember reading that dealt with death. To this day I still get emotional thinking about the end when Hazel passes away.

But, this book is so, so, so much more. A book about friendship, survival, perseverance, violence, death, and growing old(er).

Smoke Gets in Your Eyes by Caitlin Doughty

One of the first people I/we were inspired to follow when we started our journey into the word of death and dying — Caitlin Doughty. Or as most on the internet know her the founder of “The Order of the Good Death” and a leader in the Death Positive movement.

The great thing about Caitlin is that she is moving the way we memorialize FORWARD and not standing still. One of our biggest frustrations with the funeral industry is just how slow to adapt they are, but we get inspired by innovators like her.

Oh yeah the book. It’s a weird and hilarious look into the world of being a mortician. Not to mention she helps to answer some of the questions you knew you always had, but didn’t know who the hell to ask. Like “Can you catch a disease from a corpse?” and this gem “How many dead bodies can you fit in a Dodge van?”

PS — Check out her AMA on Reddit. Must read stuff!

OK. So that’s part one of our list of books to check out around death, dying, grieving, mortality, living, loving, and so forth that have and continue to inspire us to this day.

What’s missing from this list?