I can't stop thinking about the tears.

When Aaron Hernandez signed a five-year contract extension with the Patriots a little less than a year ago, his joy seemed so pure. His emotion radiated from him the way it would anyone who just came into $40 million.

But this was different. This was about more than money or finding financial security.

There was a relief in Hernandez's voice that filled every word, every syllable, as he spoke candidly about how making the right decisions allowed him to reach this point in life. He could relax. He could breathe. The demons that once chased him would forever remain at bay, so long as he chose to keep them there.

So it made sense that when he hung up the phone after learning of his new deal, he grabbed his mother, Terri, and cried. It was pure. It was bliss. He finally made it.

"I just hope I keep going, doing the right things, making the right decisions so I can have a good life, and be there to live a good life with my family," Hernandez said at the time.

How did we get from there to here? How did Hernandez go from making the right decisions to making ones that have his future shrouded in uncertainty? How did he go from crying tears of joy to being investigated by police for his part in the homicide of Odin Lloyd and sued for allegedly shooting an associate in the face?

Sitting outside of Hernandez's sprawling home while police searched its interior and the areas surrounding it for evidence of foul play, I couldn't stop thinking about those tears. I wondered if they had returned and transformed from being products of relief to those of regret.

I wondered how he veered so far off the path that he landed back on the one he walked in college, where he got into trouble for using drugs and allegedly hung out with gang members. Those issues had been dismissed with a shrug and a sigh. Perhaps they were only minor ones – though large enough to drop him to the fourth round of the 2010 draft – but it's difficult not to look at everything differently in light of recent events.

My perspective on things has nothing to do with presumed innocence or guilt. Scratch that; it actually does. I assume Hernandez is innocent until a judge tells me otherwise – if things ever even escalate to that point. But no matter how you look at the situations, he is guilty of making poor decisions.

He's made choices to associate with people and go places where he could be touched by trouble and controversy. The man he's accused of shooting in the face, Alexander Bradley, is – or was – a friend of his. Court records for a man of the same name in Connecticut, born in 1982, show multiple arrests and pending cases for recent crimes, including burglary.

In other words, if this is the same man, he is an active criminal. That's not the kind of person an NFL player should be hanging around if he wants to steer clear of trouble.

One could view Hernandez's loyalty to the people he grew up with as a commendable trait. Most of us would be lucky to have a friend who would look out for us through thick and thin. But at some point, if those people are living in the shadows, they have to step into the light or those relationships need to be put to rest. Otherwise, one risks getting pulled into the night.

It's hard to know the dynamics of Hernandez's personal relationships without knowing him away from the field, but most people who know him, past and present, describe him as good-hearted person who doesn't know how to say no to people.

With his professional success and the events that have become part of his reality, it's easy to lose sight of the fact Hernandez is still only 23 years old. At that age, most people are still trying to figure out how to put their degrees to use and develop their adult identities.

So even though he has the world in his palm, a live-in girlfriend and an infant to look after, it's somewhat understandable why Hernandez hangs out with old friends and goes to old places and does some things which, frankly, seem foolish.

It's understandable that when all of his friends are going out to a club or a sketchy strip joint, he thinks and wants to do the same. It's understandable that, to some degree, he's unwilling to let money and success change him and he just wants to be the same old Aaron with the people who were there when he was at the bottom.

But at some point, he's going to have to realize he can't live like other 23-year-olds. He's not the same old Aaron. Even if he doesn't like it, money and success change people. Or should. He has a family to look after and people who are willing to invest heavily in his future, with the understanding he take that responsibility seriously.

Maybe he got away with it for a while, but his past has caught up to his present, and now he needs to make changes. Hopefully it's not too late for him to figure these things out on his own.

Otherwise, there will just be, well ... tears.