The party last night was a bit hectic. First of all I never realised just how small my house is. Try to squeeze in ten people, and you’ll know.

Everybody made it to my place though, so I was happy. Some people even brought food. They probably heard about my non-existent cooking skills. Li Lo, Seymour and Ben all showed up dressed like hot dogs. Gussie’s appearance was a surprise. Earlier he said he will probably not come. I’m glad he did. I haven’t seen him for a while. To honour me, he dressed up as a soldier. Isn’t that sweet? He’s also quite a great dancer. For some reason Hailey came as well. Although I most definitely did not invite her. But I decided it’s not worth getting annoyed about it and upset the other guests.

After some drink I found myself alone with Ben. We were standing outside in the rain. I asked him how he’s doing and the answer was a big sigh. “That bad, huh?”, I asked. “You don’t know, Abbie”, he shook his head slowly.

“Then tell me”, I encouraged him, my hand on his shoulder.

And then he told me. It started as a flirt with Hailey. They got along fine. And Before he noticed, she was living with him. At first he didn’t mind. She was a nice girl, they had a great time together and he felt happy. He confessed he was into me at some point, but then he heard I might have something going on with Gavin. Then Hailey got pregnant and everything went downhill from there. It seemed Hailey planned the whole thing, had this “5 year plan”, she called it. Ben always wanted a family. But not so soon. And not with Hailey. When she broke the news, he knew it’s over. He has to take responsibility. He just wished they would have talked about it sooner.

“I’m sorry, Ben”, I said. “If you ever need to talk, I’m here.”

“Thanks, Abbie, it’s sweet of you. But there’s nothing you can do.”

I almost threw myself at him. Just wanted to comfort him. But then Gracie appeared and warned us to stop before Hailey notices. I went back to my kitchen with her, leaving Ben behind. Not long after, I was just talking to Li Lo, Ben appeared with a bunch of flowers in one hand and a nearly finished bottle of wine in the other. “Great”, I though, “now he’s butchering my garden.” To my horror he gave the flowers to me. Hailey was looking at us, but she didn’t seem to care. I put the flowers away quickly, but apparently not quickly enough. Gracie was staring at me with her hands spread in front of her, mouthing “What the hell?”, and Gavin was giving me the stink eye. I tried to break through the crowd to talk to him, but he turned his back on me and started dancing with some random woman. Who was she anyway? I certainly did not invite her either… The whole night Ben kept following me around with a sheepish grin, trying to talk to me. I was about to ask him not to be so obvious when Hailey jumped on my kitchen counter and started dancing and screaming, twisting her body in a way that I’m sure was meant to be sensual. Frankly, she just looked deranged. Ben freaked out that she probably had too much to drink and dragged her home before she could cause any trouble. I finally got a chance to grab Gavin. The house was still crowded, so we went outside, and sat down in the back garden. It was cold, but I didn’t mind. At first we didn’t say a word, just watched the stars. Then slowly he put his hand on my hand and stroked it with his little finger. I looked at him, not quite sure what to say. He sighed. I seem to have this effect on guys these days. “Gavin, please tell me what’s going on. I keep hearing things and I can’t help but wonder… Is it true? You and that Terri? Was there nothing between us?”

“There was…”, he said. “There is…”

“It’s just not that simple?”, I ventured. This is what they always say in romantic movies, aren’t they? I felt like an ass.

He finally looked at me. “It never is.”

Why does everyone around me sound so bloody philosophical? Couldn’t they just say what they think?

Then he told me about Terri. How she came back after they broke up. He didn’t want to be with her, but didn’t know what to do about her either. She kept showing up at his door, looking miserable. She kept telling him how much she missed him, and wanted another chance. She kept talking about the good old days, although Gavin had some different memories of that year. Apparently he didn’t feel comfortable with her in the beginning, haven’t even wanted to move in with her in the first place. It was her idea and he just went along with it. Soon she became overly attached and jealous. When Gavin got into trouble at the hospital and they sued him, he had to go on trial. More than ever he needed support from Terri, but all he got was more accusations of him cheating on her with that celebrity, his accuser. Everything was about her. Eventually Gavin broke down and just left. Sounds familiar…

“Why didn’t you say something?”, I asked, holding his hand. “Why did you think you need to disappear?”

“I’m sorry, Abbie. I didn’t want to put all this on you. I thought I will sort this out myself. Honestly? I feel ashamed. I didn’t want you to get mixed up in this whole thing. Like I said, she’s nuts. It’s my problem anyway.”

“No, Gavin… please don’t say that”, I said, pulling him closer. He looked at me, eyes open wide. “Abbie…”, he whispered.

“Yes?”, I whispered back.

He kissed me very gently. I felt like I was floating. I started pulling him back towards the house. As we stepped in, he grabbed my waist, and kissed me again.

Oh, and Li Lo! She was the last one staying around, and walked right in on us. Poor girl tried to become one with the wallpaper. Gavin shot a tentative glance towards my bedroom. This just made me giggle. I started running upstairs, shrieking “Catch me if you can!”

Well, he did. By the time I woke up this morning, he was gone.