(Do you know what that does to a man? Do you know how off-kilter my sense of what’s newsworthy has become? Do you know what Ryan Lochte is doing? No, seriously, do you have any idea what he’s doing right now, because pleasant Saturday morning tales about Kendal Thompson are not getting it done.)

Where was I? Oh. Right. So I wasn’t the only one to discover how much attention one could get from writing about a popular former adult actress. Redskins rookie linebacker Su’a Cravens — the dynamic second-round pick who appears to be the early star of this draft class — made the same discovery Friday morning.

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“Since she missed last weeks game had to make sure she’s on her Ps and Qs this week,” Cravens tweeted Friday morning, with a screenshot of himself Face-Timing with Kahlifa, the well-known Redskins (and Caps and Nats and Wizards) fan.

https://twitter.com/Sua_Cravens/status/766632268559478785

The typical Su’a Cravens tweet gets a few dozen reactions. This one? Thousands.

“I thought it was funny, the reactions I got,” Cravens told me Friday night after Washington’s preseason win over the Jets. “Comes with the territory, I guess.”

While far too many Redskins fans jumped to impure and/or unseemly conclusions based on this innocent-looking online interaction, Cravens stressed that the two are — that’s right — “just friends.” After Cravens was drafted this spring, Khalifa (not her real name) “hit me up then, just to congratulate me,” he said. “So we just talked then, and we’ve just been friends ever since. She’s a real good fan, as well as a hockey fan. I’m not a hockey fan at all, so she’s been trying to get me to watch hockey and stuff. She’s a die-hard Capitals fan, so she gets mad at me whenever I make fun of her for watching it. But she’s just a friend.”

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(What am I doing? I mean, what am I doing? Do you know the sort of stuff I used to say when I explained why I wanted to be a journalist? Do you know how earnest it was? Do you know how much of it had to do with Twitter conversations between NFL rookies and former adult actresses?)

The two exchanged more public messages Friday, further exciting Redskins fans and observers, who — like me — really ought to find better things to think about. Cravens said the two Face Time “all the time,” but they’ve never met in person. He said it’s “pretty dope” that such a well-known social media thought leader is a Redskins fan, and he said his teammates “thought it was cool, so I guess that’s all that matters.” As for the rampant innuendo fans have been sending his way?

“I didn’t specify, so I knew I was gonna let people assume what they wanted to, but I don’t really care,” he said. “She’s just a friend, so it didn’t bother me too much.”

https://twitter.com/Sua_Cravens/status/766716375486390273

Cravens further explained his thoughts on social media in a recent conversation with CSN’s JP Finlay. They seem apropos here.

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“I mean, my age group, we are definitely in the social-media game,” he said. “But for me, I used to be that crazy fan that wanted to always speak to his favorite players, or trash talk to ones that I didn’t like. And now that we have the platform to give them the opportunity to reach out to us and sometimes be heard, and we can interact, I think it’s fun. I think it’s a good way to get to know the fans around the DMV, and it’s also a good way to spread my team’s name and spread positivity.”