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Is that ... is that mule wearing novelty pantyhose? No? Those are supposed to be his actual legs?

Hahahahaha, look at that thing! Look at his stripes, abruptly ending at the thigh! He looks so fake that even he can't believe it. James Cameron would've rejected him from Avatar for looking like far too silly a mix of two species. Yet he is completely real and absolutely awesome, and has a kickass name to go with his peculiar visage. Ladies and gentlemen, meet the zonkey:

Zonkey.co.uk

He's clocking in at nearly three times the legal limit for adorable.

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You're probably familiar with the zebra, the most flamboyant member of the equine family. You might not know that it is, in fact, every bit as pimp as its striped coat implies. What we're saying is that the zebra loves his ladies. Also, he's not too particular when it comes to race: In fact, both male and female zebras can and absolutely will get down with pretty much all of their horsey relatives. This has produced some extremely curious offspring, their strange coloration only matched by their ridiculous names: Apart from the zonkey (zebra father, donkey mother), there's the zedonk (donkey dad, zebra mom) and zebrass (an alternate name for that extra mile in humiliation).

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However, zebras have no concept of human language, and these zebroid hybrids are actually considered pretty awesome among their kin. They are effortlessly able to live among wild zebras and donkeys alike, and being sterile hybrids with no risk for procreation, they presumably have some pretty wild Saturday nights.