

I'm a late 20's male. I run 30 miles a week, surf 6 times a week for 2 hours (weekends are marathon 6 hour sessions) and do free-weights randomly throughout the week. I am 5'11" and ~174 pounds.



I am basically anorexic throughout the week, zero food during the day, healthy home prepared dinner. I eat whatever I want on the weekends (pizza, subs, chinese, cookies, beer, lots of beer) and feel guilty about it Sunday night.



My mom says I am 'skinny', but moms do that. I feel fit, strong and in shape, but can't help passing a mirror without checking myself out. Manboobs, a slight belly. Need more tone in my arms. My abs aren't showing enough. My 32 waist shorts feel tight this evening.



I judge every photo of me based on how my weight looks and how the skin on my face is bunched up. Is that shirt too tight? Can I see a belly?



By every definition of the US average, I am in incredibly great shape, but how would i stack up in, say, France?. My clothes looks good, shoulders are strong, I wear a medium, my jeans sag off my waist (although I feel the button pushing against my tummy).



So, help? is this normal? I used to be a little chubby but nothing severe, and I'm paranoid I'll get back to that weight. I enjoy the confidence of venturing in to the world knowing I look toned, but when I'm alone, I'm pinching my (lack of) tummy fat and sighing, feeling guilty about eating 1600 calories today and knowing people are looking at me thinking "he looks in shape, but he could be in better shape"

Body dysmorphic disorder with no insurance, self diagnose before investing in a shrink?