We are the watchers on St Kilda Esplanade.

Australia’s defence needs are expensive and complex, raising a very serious question: isn’t it time we launched our very own Night’s Watch?

I’ve done a little research and found the perfect posse: a bunch of guys who’ve spent years quietly learning actual medieval sword fighting. They may not have the flip-floppy curls and darkly brooding countenance of His Royal Hotness Jon Snow, but these guys can probably wield a sword for Australia better than any of our favourite Game of Thrones characters. And what’s a knight without a sword?

Scott Nimmo and Dominic Mauricio are the men behind the jumble of fighters training at the Melbourne Swordplay Guild, one of about thirty European swordsmanship associations that have sprung up across Australia over the past decade. They launched the guild in 2003 after the Australian College of Arms moved to Brisbane, leaving Melbourne swordfighting fans high and dry. At studios in Footscray and Camberwell, Nimmo and Mauricio teach Historical European Martial Arts, with a focus on the Italian style known as ‘Armizare’.



As the above video amply demonstrates, they’re not messing around. And you could argue they’ve been blooded, considering they regularly spar at massive competitions like the annual Geelong Highland Gathering nationals.

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How Do You Even Learn How To Swordfight In The Twenty-First Century?

You might not have heard of the Guild, but it wasn’t that long ago that close combat fighting as entertainment was a thing here in Australia. Back in the 1880s, crowds of 10,000 used to pack the Melbourne Cricket Ground for Scottish Backhold wrestling competitions, for example.

Then along came World War I and fighting for entertainment fell out of favour — it wasn’t until ten years ago that associations here began to pick it back up again. But there’s a small problem with trying to teach an art form that no longer exists: there’s no one living who knows exactly how it was done back in the day. “No one has had to go off and fight to the death with a sword for a very long while, thankfully. Now, the only way to learn how they used to fight is to go back to the sources,” Nimmo says.

Which basically means Nimmo and his mates have been scratching around in 600-year old manuals, trying to decipher the writings of Fiore Furlan dei Liberi da Premariacco, a guy who taught people how to duel to the death and was considered the greatest fencing master of the late 1300s. Other groups are crowdfunding for 200-year-old fighting tactic guides to “save them from disappearing into a private collection”.

Of course, it’s all a matter of interpretation and apparently things can get pretty heated in online forums over exactly what is and isn’t correct. “We’re talking about a bunch of people who are little bit on the nerdy side,” Nimmo says. “They’re generally very intelligent and unfortunately they know it so you can get into these weird arguments about interpretations and techniques.”

Nimmo says many of his students are role players in games like Dungeons and Dragons who decided they wanted to pick up a real sword. Others were inspired by TV series like Vikings, Supernatural and Outlander or movies like Kingdom of Heaven and even Princess Bride (hint: that first sword fight includes the names of actual fencing masters).

Almost everyone quickly gets sucked into the drama and intrigue of sword fighting’s real-life history. “They’re not typical people who are interested in martial arts,” he says. “They love history and like the idea of bringing back something that’s been lost. The more you read, the more you realise there is to learn and the more engrossed you get into it, especially if you’re a little bit peculiar.”

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That’s Not A Sword, This Is A Sword

But unlike role playing or TV watching, this is physical stuff, and fighters keep very fit. Dummies need not apply because sword fighting requires a lot of mental grunt work, too. “If you’re in some sort of fight without weapons, you don’t know where the person is going to punch from. With sword fighting, you learn particular guards are useful for certain attacks,” Nimmo says. “So you can have fights where almost no one touches each other for a while. You’re just constantly probing out, testing each other.”

For the most part, Nimmo’s guys are fighting with actual steel (for which, under the Victorian Government’s tough weapons control act , they need a licence or exemption). Younger kids use padded foam long swords — apparently it’s a bit like being hit in a pillow fight — and teens use a kind of synthetic sword, but everyone else is wielding the real thing. Despite what you might think, though, it’s not actually that dangerous — Nimmo’s a former Aussie Rules football coach and says he saw more injuries in one footy season than in thirteen years of swordsmanship training.

But that training isn’t — and never should be — used for self-defence. ”I can teach anyone in under five minutes how to kill someone with a knife, almost regardless of the person’s skill,” Nimmo says. “It’s too easy to kill and maim someone. It’s a simple case of momentum and fully putting in the attack without any regard for yourself. So you don’t do it. I always say the best defence against a knife attack is running.”

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Now for the hard-hitting question: Is Jon Snow really such a good fighter?

While plenty of his students are inspired by TV series, Nimmo says on-screen representations of sword fights are often laughable — although Jon Snow is actually a pretty good fighter. Likewise, Arya Stark’s fencing master Syrio is the bomb, though sadly, the Water Dance isn’t a real thing.

Then there’s that epic bridge fight between Brienne of Tarth and Jamie Lannister (which would have been way cooler with lightsabers). They both could have killed each other. Repeatedly. “There’s a certain trope you see in movies, which is always hilarious. They get up really close and their swords are touching each other and they talk and push. That’s always the wrong thing to do,” Nimmo says. “They need to get in nice and close to converse to move the plot along further — but as soon as you go into that position, I’m pommel striking you in the face.”

Ouch.