I am posting this now because I had some time to think on it myself, and ponder that statement, which led me to my own revelations in my life, but I wanted to share this story with GAF as well.



So I have a friend who found out she has pancreatic cancer about a week ago and of course she is freaking out about it. I tried to keep her spirits up, but she's a smart woman, she knows the percentage chance of survival they give you. Well while she was in the hospital we had a conversation about Hell's Kitchen. It was the normal conversation, about how the women are kicking the men's ass and what not, then out of the blue she begins to cry. NOW me being kinda awkward with emotions I ask her what's wrong, at which point she laughs and says "really" then I laugh, and for a moment we're cool.



Well a few moments later, she tells me flat out "I lived a life I regret. I look back and see I was miserable."



So I'm like "well you know you should keep a positive attitude and we'll all hope for the best. She then looked at me with dead serious eyes and told me "If you found out you would die in a month, would you feel like you spent your life doing something you loved, or just getting by?"



I honestly looked at her a moment stunned because yeah, she was right. I currently work at a job I hate, and keep putting off doing what I love "just because".



She then told me something you hear much, but never really consider "Life is short, don't look back and regret not at least trying to do what you wanted to do." So yeah I kinda left the hospital that night thinking "Well fuck, I need to get my ass in gear, i'm 33 and while I make a living, I don't enjoy my job, I don't really enjoy my life."



I then decided to try to write seriously again. It was something I tried 10 years ago but got a few rejection letters and quit. But it's something I feel like I am supposed to do, and I'm happy while doing it, so I'm going to listen to her words and go for it again.



So the point in posting this is two fold I guess; to maybe inspire someone else who may be putting off things in their life to get out and do it, and two, to help me feel a bit better.



So GAF, what are your dreams, desires, wants in life? What do you "want to be"?