The Well Site Retreat Society

In 1996 a group of four men began the search for a piece of land that could accommodate a retreat center for men. It needed to be close enough to Victoria and Duncan to allow for reasonable travel time and remote enough that we could engage in building projects and outdoor activities without disturbing the surrounding neighbors.

Through our community networking we met a man who was a well-known supporter of community causes and arranged an appointment to meet with him. After listening to our vision, he offered us the use of 160 acres of forested land located on the top of the Malahat which he thought would suit our purposes perfectly.

Upon visiting the property, we all felt that it was the ideal location and we immediately began the process of networking and creating the foundation of our society. The original vision was to assist men in crisis by building facilities to assist them during times of crisis with events, physical exercise, good conversation and great food around a campfire.

For over ten years we invited men and boys to come up and lend a hand, with an emphasis on those experiencing times of difficulty in their lives. A large part of our vision was to collectively build enough cabins and supporting structures that we might eventually be able to provide sanctuary to men in need.

As the project and property evolved, we were able to facilitate work-sharing events for fathers and sons who gained real skills working together with other men and boys. Some of the participants were in real need of a collective, non-judgmental and healing environment. Activities included: trail building, constructing cabins, construction of an all-weather longhouse shelter, road clearing and drainage projects. In this we were very successful and created a lasting legacy. We became known in the Shawinigan and Malahat areas as “The Mancuary” and often had individuals from the area visiting the shelter for wiener roasts with their families.

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The center continued to thrive until 2005 when group members began to age and younger men to replace them were hard to find. I had mentored my two sons and their friends to come to many events and building projects but they were not ready to take on a leadership role yet, so, while not their fault, the society foundered.

Partly out of stress and a painful sense of abandonment I from my Board of Directors as well as other personal factors I developed throat cancer. Fortunately, I was treated and survived, but this was a strong message to me that trying to accomplish something as big as societal change is bigger than any one person. To be honest, I thought the board were in agreement with my goals for assisting men in crisis but only a few were.

Today in 2017 I am rebuilding for future men’s projects with clearly committed men who are leading and acting in their own ways to foster Inclusive Masculinity. In addition, I am involved in an organization called Inclusive Leadership Cooperative, based in Duncan BC. I have been invited to develop an Inclusive Masculinity course for their online education program. (This was before I had discovered The Good Man Project) While the cooperative is quite active with disadvantaged kids and adults the online segment is new. My course will be only the second offering to date, although more are on the horizon.

Victoria itself, has been a hotbed of men’s activism for many years. Other past organizations I have been involved with include Island Men Network (early 1990’s) and the Victoria Men’s Centre (1994-1995). Both faded out due to a lack of funding from government and the general public’s unwillingness to support us.

But the passion is still there!

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Photo Credit: Getty Images