I mentioned the Vault Accounting 50 yesterday, and even though we don’t pore over the listings like we used to, there’s still one part of them that we haven’t tired of yet: bitter 1-star reviews of accounting firms. So yes, I dug through the 1-star reviews of a few dozen accounting firms for an hour just so we could enjoy them together on a Friday afternoon. Isn’t that nice? Yes. It is. Anyway, here we go.

KPMG — Full disclosure: I used to work at KPMG, so one of my former colleagues or I could’ve easily uttered any of these, but they’re all dated 2017, so probably not. Good to see not much has changed.

Good for this person who’s trying to be positive:

This one’s a classic argument against working at any Big 4 firm:

This next one is terrible advice. “Come to this place where you’ll be unhappy for as long as you’re here so that you can be less miserable in the job after that.” I’m relieved that no one found this review helpful.

Here’s the Hemingway of the bunch:

Okay, that’s enough picking on KPMG. Look at this epic review for EY. Yikes.

Did I mention Hemingway earlier? That was downright verbose compared this one on Moss Adams (yeah, it’s from 2015, but who cares):

And here are a couple (also dated) from Friedman, LLP that are dripping with acrimony:

If this sounds like you or anyone you know, maybe it’s time for a vacation.

Past bitterness:

These 1-Star Reviews of Accounting Firms Are The Saddest, Best