This piece originally appeared on Femsplain.com. Femsplain is a community for everyone, powered by personal stories from anyone female-identified. It has been given minor edits before re-posting.

Editor's Note: Upon first publishing, this post did not link to a source article. This error has since been fixed.

There have been, unfortunately, a lot of lies — white and otherwise — going around about women and sex. They’re not helping anyone (and can, in fact, be emotionally and even physically damaging), so it’s time to get real about some of the lies that women have been implicitly or explicitly told about sex. Abstaining from sex, it should be noted, is the only way to avoid getting pregnant or an STI. But once you do start having sex (safely, and with a consensual and mature partner), it's important to be educated about your body. Here's a primer:

1. All Women Have Vaginas

Nope. Gender identity and sexual organs you were born with are two different things. No matter what genitalia a person is born with, they can identify themselves as male, female, both, neither, or however else they experience themselves in the world.

2. Virginity Is a Real Thing That Means Something

Virginity only exists as a social construct. Historically, it was used to commodify a woman’s sexuality. Today, it elevates penis-in-vagina sex as the ultimate sexual destination. Not only is this a heteronormative view of sex that devalues LGBTQ sex, but it diminishes the seriousness of all other sexual acts. This can put added pressure on young people to participate in sexual acts they may not be ready for by lessening them to “not real sex.” The concept of virginity also places a woman’s worth on her sexual “purity,” which leads to slut-shaming and sex-shaming. Virginity can mean something completely different to two people...that's up to you and your beliefs.

3. Women Don’t Masturbate

While studies have shown that women tend to masturbate a little less than men, most women masturbate at some point in their lives. And that’s a great thing! Masturbation allows you to discover what your body likes, and it allows for some pretty great sexual satisfaction. The myth that women don’t or shouldn’t masturbate leads many women to feeling shameful for exploring their bodies and, ultimately, for their sexuality.

4. Too Much Sex Will Ruin Your Vagina

The vagina is a highly elastic muscle, not a pair of jeans — it’s not going to “stretch out” after being used. This myth only serves to shame women for being sexually active (are we sensing a theme here?), hence the term “loose woman.”

5. Having Babies Will Ruin Your Vagina

Although some women report changes in sensitivity, post-baby vaginas largely return back to their original shape within weeks of giving birth.

6. All Trans Women Want a Vagina

Remember before when I said that gender identity and sexual organs are two different things? That also means that not everyone who identifies as a woman feels the need to surgically alter her body. There are several different surgical options for trans women, including sexual reassignment, breast augmentation, facial feminization, and more. Which (if any) of these surgeries to undergo is deeply personal to each individual woman and how she expresses her gender identity.

7. Size Is *Everything*

As Julianne Ross at Mic points out, size does matter. Kind of. To some people. But not as much as you think. The reality is that the average penis is just over 5 inches long when erect, which makes sense when you consider that the average vagina is only 3-4 inches long.