Should I worry about my children taking drugs?

The population of the UK spent £6.7 billion on illegal drugs in 2013 according to the Office of National Statistics.

Drugs are a fact of modern life.

Drugs are present everywhere including school, and yes, that includes the school that your child attends.

Bear in mind that according to the NHS, 1 out of every 10 eleven-year-olds and 1 out of every 4 fifteen-year-olds have tried drugs.

These figures do not come from some scaremongering newspaper looking to shock readers to increase sales, or some sanctimonious person moralising about the 'youth of today'. These are figures collected by the National Health Service of England and Wales.

So unless your eleven-year-old child meets with less than 10 children each day at school, they will know someone who has tried drugs. Furthermore, given how freely children talk among themselves, it is very likely that they will know of this child's experience which will usually be described in glowingly positive terms.

Unfortunately, while pupils will find drugs readily available at school, they will not find accurate and balanced information equally on offer.

If the child who has experimented is one of your children's friends or a friend of a friend of theirs, they may be persuaded or tempted to try drugs themselves. Even if it is not one of their friends, the peer pressure or temptation can be very strong based on the information that they receive and their desire to be accepted.

This does not mean you are a bad parent nor does it mean you have a bad relationship with your child.

Sadly, there are many stories of children raised in loving homes by good parents that have taken drugs. If you are in any doubt, a brief search of the news media will reveal many such tragic stories. Do not be complacent.

Drugs are a highly complicated and charged subject. Many children who communicate well with their parents on difficult topics like sex, will hold back when it comes to drugs for fear of judgement and reprimand.

So what can you do, other than despair?

Lock your children up and cut them off from society, or threaten them with a string of severe punishments that will bring their social lives to a sharp end?

It will not work. It will only encourage your children to deceive you if they ever try drugs.

1. Be prepared

You need to know as much as you can about drugs. Read, read, and read.

2. Be proactive

Deal with the issue head on. Raise the topic with your children. Do not wait for them to talk to you about drugs. Do not hesitate. Do not be scared.

Start talking as soon as you can about taking drugs, and keep talking until they reach adulthood. You need to make sure that there is no hesitation to talk about the subject.

3. Do not judge

Any moral judgements and condemnation will not prevent children from taking drugs. What they will do, is dramatically reduce the chances of them talking to you about the subject.

It is very tempting to go on about the 'evils of drug use' and remind your children that all you want is for them to be safe, but resist the temptation because it simply does not work. Do not underestimate the power of peer pressure and curiosity.

4. Be honest

Their peers will tell them how good drugs feel. They will talk about the pleasure of being high.

Do not pretend that there is no positive side to drug taking. Do not let them hear it only from their peers. Present a balance argument.

Talk about the pleasure of being high, and the risk of becoming addicted. Talk about feeling calm and relaxed, versus the anxiety of coming down. Talk about being able to forget all your troubles while on drugs, and the loss of time, memory and health that results.

Help your children to make wise, informed decisions. If they decide that the risks are not worth the pleasure, there is a far greater chance they will refuse drugs when the opportunity arises, and the opportunity will arise when you are not around. That much you can be certain about.

Encourage them to ask questions and to challenge what you tell them. Do not be worried about not knowing the answer, but instead use questions you cannot answer as a chance to do research together.

Where do I begin?

A good place to begin is to learn about the most commonly tried and used illegal drugs in the UK.

Seek assistance

Never feel scared to ask professionals. Start by speaking to your GP. They will be able to offer advice without judging, and more importantly, connect you with the appropriate services and specialists to help.