352 views

Hitler Reacts to Leaked Mormon Policy About Excluding Children of Gay Parents

00:00 - 00:03 Herr Führer, we have news from the exmormon subreddit.

00:04 - 00:05 A policy was leaked, detailing new rules

00:05 - 00:07 for the treatment of children of gay parents.

00:08 - 00:12 Children will now be excluded from all blessings and ordinances

00:12 - 00:15 until they reach the age of eighteen.

00:17 - 00:19 Reddit is a cesspool.

00:19 - 00:21 It's probably just anti-Mormon rhetoric.

00:24 - 00:26 Mein Führer,

00:27 - 00:28 John...

00:31 - 00:33 John Dehlin confirmed the leak.

00:34 - 00:36 Major news outlets have picked it up.

00:53 - 00:58 Anyone who says, "doubt your doubts before you doubt your faith," get out.

01:13 - 01:15 What the hell is this shit?

01:15 - 01:17 I had a monopoly on prejudice!

01:18 - 01:23 Who would have thought to punish the children as well as the gays themselves?

01:25 - 01:28 It says here that rapists and attempted murderers "may" be discplined.

01:29 - 01:31 Yet for same-sex relationships, the action is mandatory!

01:31 - 01:34 I've never heard of something so backward.

01:34 - 01:37 They obviously just want to get rid of the "gay influence"

01:37 - 01:40 by making entire families feel unwelcome!

01:40 - 01:42 Mein Führer, the children can still pay tithing and seek special permission --

01:42 - 01:46 Special permission! What kind of organization stunts its own growth?

01:46 - 01:48 Mein Führer, the rule is meant to protect children.

01:48 - 01:52 You don't protect children by isolating them from their peers!

01:53 - 01:54 They want to baptize me!

01:56 - 01:57 I am the most prolific murderer of our time

01:57 - 02:00 and they want to convert me to Mormonism after I die,

02:00 - 02:03 but if a child has even one gay parent, they're not wanted?

02:04 - 02:08 How dare they call themselves Christians?

02:08 - 02:13 If "good" people accept this, where the hell does that leave me?

02:14 - 02:16 Must I open a soup kitchen now?

02:17 - 02:22 I'll spend the whole weekend knitting pride flags just to correct the balance!

02:27 - 02:29 I don't know how to deal with this.

02:30 - 02:33 Just when you think you understand all their arbitrary rules,

02:34 - 02:36 they add more contradictions.

02:41 - 02:42 The Word of Wisdom...

02:43 - 02:47 Not even a hot cup of tea in the dead of winter!

02:48 - 02:53 Don't even get me started on the masturbation issue!

02:54 - 02:56 Maybe if these puritans enjoyed their own sex lives more,

02:56 - 02:59 they wouldn't be so worried about what other people do!

03:00 - 03:02 Let alone take it out on the kids!

03:04 - 03:07 Don't worry, he's not talking about us.

03:14 - 03:17 They'll release a clarification soon,

03:19 - 03:23 but it won't change the darkness in their hearts.

03:25 - 03:26 Hypocrites.

03:31 - 03:33 The world must know.

03:40 - 03:46 Let's see how they like it when international papers report this.

03:46 - 03:49 Watch the backpedaling then.