It isn’t uncommon to hear or be a witness to fights over ancestral property. I think this is prevalent in most of the cultures where siblings feel the right to belong these properties and small petty fights turn into family wars. But are these fights justified? Someone gets a bigger chunk and while the other may receive a smaller one. The matter gets even worse when the legal system and judiciary is involved in it. It is literally disrespecting each other when it is the same family and there have been happy childhood memories of these siblings playing together.

What happened to that love and compassion which once dwelled in their hearts? Or was it just a temporary feeling of the childhood? Of course, Love is a feeling which can never die or fade away with time. People often comment that it is only post marriage when the family extends or to be specific individual shares his/her life with their partner does this lethal mind set develop. But is this answer satisfying to the heart? I am sure not because coming from the same family, we all stand by each other through thick and thins. But the real problem lays here in the family system.

Yes, you heard it right, it is the family system’s way to highlight an imbalance with these kind of fights. But instead of identifying the imbalance, we get along with it and participate with more zeal. As if we are enjoying when we see the face of it. But deep within there is a feeling of remorse. In such a situation, one needs to acknowledge what is out of balance and most importantly honour their parents and ancestors.

Case study: Can I get my ancestral property back?

This is because it is all the hard work of these people that we are able to enjoy. And how can one disrespect someone’s hard work. And while we are busy fighting and hauling at each other we are forgetting another important aspect that our parents, grandparents and ancestors are all living within us.

Of course, we are an individual soul but at the same time we belong to our family system and all the past members live in, breathe in within us. Whilst fighting, they are dying within us, their spirit to live life is dying and so is ours. The worst effect of these fights is in turn borne with the future generations as the system always wants to balance itself.

These children are subconsciously aware of the greed which the past generation has shown. They unconsciously, unknowingly sacrifice happiness and fulfilment in their lives to correct these imbalances.

My question now is, do we want our future generations to sacrifice on their happiness just because of our deeds? Isn’t it important that we create a loving world for ourselves and our children because non of us is going to enjoy the fruits of the hard work of our ancestors until we respect it. So, what are you waiting for? Get going and give these past members of our family their due love and respect!!!