The "softboi" has been brought to attention by the Instagram account "beam_me_up_softboi."

He's the kind of guy who writes poems, has a fascination with Yoko Ono and the human condition, and only listens to his dad's old albums on a record player.

But beware, there's also a hint of disdain behind everything he says because he thinks he's superior to you.

Dark personality experts Shannon Thomas and Perpetua Neo told Insider about some of the parallels between the softboi you might meet on a dating app and toxic narcissists.

They write confusing prose, target vulnerable people, thrive off chaos, and are deeply inauthentic. Essentially, a softboi is a confused 15-year-old trapped in an adult's body.

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His type isn't girls who like pop music, wear basic clothes, and "look like everyone else."

"I like girls that are a little different," he says.

He is the softboi, brought to attention by the Instagram account "beam_me_up_softboi," which posts screenshots sent in by followers who have been on the receiving end of their deep, meaningful chat-up lines.

"I don't do portraits ... I can paint your aura," says one.

"I'm gonna go for a sober cigarette and listen to Bon Iver to get me in the mood ..." says another. "I hope I drown in my tears."

me on this lovely friday night A post shared by we r all indie softbois here (@beam_me_up_softboi) on Jan 11, 2019 at 12:16pm PST Jan 11, 2019 at 12:16pm PST

He's 'something of a mystery'

A softboi is the kind of guy who prefers to talk about the human condition over prattling about your job. He writes you poems when high on acid, and his "above average" sex drive means he's always one message away from sending you a dick pic.

He wears chunky jumpers and blazers and buys organic wine, mainly so he can decry the bottle you bought from the grocery store. He wants to know what you think of Yoko Ono and mushrooms, but only so he can tell you what your opinion should be.

He is complicated and damaged, but he'll set his pain aside just for you. His exes were all crazy, but you're different.

He will tell you he's "something of a mystery" and is "unlike anybody you've ever met." But he's also a complete fraud.

let me know now A post shared by we r all indie softbois here (@beam_me_up_softboi) on Jul 7, 2018 at 4:48pm PDT Jul 7, 2018 at 4:48pm PDT

Softbois seem genuinely interested at first, then ghost without warning

While the softboi's over-dramatic and self-deprecating words have been screenshotted and turned into a popular meme account, something more sinister could lie behind them than just a guy who thinks he's the "sensitive" type.

Trauma therapist Shannon Thomas, author of "Healing from Hidden Abuse," told Insider there are many parallels between the internet softboi and abusive narcissists.

"Softbois are the covert version of their more obvious toxic counterparts out there in the dating world," she said. "At their core, softbois are narcissistic in their belief that people are in their lives to keep them from getting bored."

They also operate on the belief that everyone is disposable. While the softboi will hold an in-depth conversation and appear to be a genuinely engaging listener, he will ghost you suddenly and without warning.

"They often take pride in their ability to flutter from one person to another without 'drama,'" Thomas said. "The truth is softbois leave a wake of ghosting and hurt feelings, but they are so long gone to even notice the damage. "

Read more: Narcissists all follow the same patterns — here are some of the most common phrases they use

Their messages are designed to make them seem philosophical

Perpetua Neo, a doctor of psychology who helps women recover from toxic relationships, told Insider that the over-complicated streams of consciousness and thinly veiled patronization in a softboi's messages may actually be part of his plan to hook you in.

The first sign is that the majority of softboi messages don't make a lot of sense.

"There is this thing called word salad," Neo said. "When you speak to a narcissist, things get very confusing. It's almost like words are just thrown together in a random way that kind of makes your brain freeze."

For example, one submission on beam_me_up_softboi features a message from a man who believes he has "heavy thoughts and opinions on things" that most people don't understand.

"Partly because the ideas or thing I believe in my psyche are very reminiscent of the Lovecraftian existential horror you'd feel when realizing your fragile futility on the scale of the universe," he says.

This could be because he's one of the narcissists who are very blazé about the fact that they like to confuse people, said Neo.

"Sometimes they will call themselves a mind-f----r," she said. "I wouldn't be surprised if softbois wear it as a secret badge of honour."

if you're too attached to this vague phrase i just typed out using the auto predict feature on my iphone that realistically no one, including myself, can decipher then we Might not get along A post shared by we r all indie softbois here (@beam_me_up_softboi) on Jul 30, 2019 at 2:58am PDT Jul 30, 2019 at 2:58am PDT

They target the vulnerable with lovebombing

Experienced daters are usually savvy enough to recognize softboi prose as a red flag, but others mistake their uneasy gut feeling as intrigue.

Neo said these are people who are attracted to narcissists because they are vulnerable to emotional manipulation, either because they're trying to heal from past trauma or they are highly empathetic.

"They think 'this is quite interesting and quite challenging, let me try and figure it out.'" she said. "So they get sucked into this rabbit hole, from which they tumble down even more rabbit holes."

It's extra confusing because the softboi will often match their woeful commentary with the manipulative tactic of lovebombing — being overly complimentary and affectionate, claiming they are "the one," and making plans for an idyllic future. They lay it on so thick it can be really hard to reject them, especially if you've been unlucky in love before.

"Remember in the initial stage of a pre-relationship there always needs to be breathing space," said Neo. "If someone is bombarding you all the time, it's not because it's all so intense and passionate, it's because they're looking for a way in."

Read more: People with type A personalities attract narcissists, but a relationship between the two is a recipe for disaster

'Our messaging went from 0 to 100 real quick'

Lucille, a 23-year-old PR consultant, realized she was speaking to a softboi on day one because of how intense he was.

"Our messaging went from 0 to 100 real quick," she told Insider. "Before I knew it he was asking me deep and emotional questions about my life and wittering on about how he felt a great connection with me even just by speaking to me over text."

He said things like "I'm probably quite an intense lover," "I already know you're my type of gal," and how he'd had flings in between relationships "to ease the pain."

When they finally went on a date, he was "dull as dishwater" and didn't offer up anything except a desperate desire to sleep with her, Lucille said.

"I think the worst thing about dating a softboi ... is that I tend to feel like underneath it all they're just a fuckboi trying to conceal [it] with emotions that they think will make girls like them," she said.

Lucille listened to her gut and broke things off with the softboi the day after he tried to guilt-trip her for not immediately getting into bed with him. She hasn't heard from him since.

"They get real deep, draw you in, and then tend to screw you over at the last minute," she said. "I think it's one of the most manipulative kinds of people as it tends to just be a lure."

A post shared by we r all indie softbois here (@beam_me_up_softboi) Dec 28, 2018 at 11:55am PST

They thrive off drama and chaos

Another theme to look out for is the drama triangle. This is where someone flips between the roles victim, persecutor, and savior. Narcissists do this to keep their victims on their toes because they thrive off the chaos it causes.

Many of the messages on beam_me_up_softboi, for instance, start out looking for sympathy but turn sour almost immediately.

"There's this superiority complex, like 'I know better, you should be grateful to me for even giving you the time of day,' which is the savior," Neo said. " Then if you slip up, they will be this persecutor, calling you stupid, and 'normal,' while 'I am so different.'"

Some ways good some way bad A post shared by we r all indie softbois here (@beam_me_up_softboi) on Jun 17, 2018 at 5:54am PDT Jun 17, 2018 at 5:54am PDT

Playing the victim is also a handy tactic when future arguments arise. Narcissists often claim to have past traumas and even mental illnesses to absolve them from everything they do.

Everyone goes through bad times in their life, but narcissists choose to keep themselves there like a "never-ending trainwreck," Neo said, so they can turn every accusation back on their victim.

"For instance, they say 'cut me some slack, the reason why I didn't apologize when I stood you up is becuase I've had this long-standing problem, so it's your fault for being upset.' You can never expect proper human respect."

Read more: 5 ways your body is showing you you're in the wrong relationship

Softbois might watch a lot of movies to seem more authentic

After texting with a softboi for a while, or even meeting up, you'll soon start to realize their exes probably received the same bad treatment — that's if they have a significant relationship history at all.

Thomas said you should ask how long their average relationship has lasted and how much time they believe should occur between meeting someone new and becoming an exclusive couple.

"If they can't give you a clear answer or their reply feels inauthentic, beware," she said. "It could be a bright red flag you've crossed paths with a softboi who isn't looking for a deeper attachment or future together."

yeah but A post shared by we r all indie softbois here (@beam_me_up_softboi) on Mar 5, 2019 at 1:56pm PST Mar 5, 2019 at 1:56pm PST

Softbois also have a thing for movies. Neo said this is because watching characters can help narcissists fill in the gaps where their empathy is lacking.

"It's very easy to fake emotional intelligence," she said. "Watching movies helps them know how to act in different situations — you know the right things to say and the right things to do, like giving this person a cuddle and a kiss. You tick the right boxes."

Read more: Some people can't help being attracted to narcissists — here's why

It also helps achieve his main goal of setting himself apart from everyone else, and speaking with a hint of disdain when he asks if you've ever heard of dubstep or watched "Pulp Fiction."

The intention is to make you feel small, Neo said, belittling you just the right amount so you start seeing him as your guide who holds all the secrets to the universe.

Go: A post shared by we r all indie softbois here (@beam_me_up_softboi) on Jul 17, 2018 at 1:18pm PDT Jul 17, 2018 at 1:18pm PDT

Don't be afraid to walk away

If you think that sounds creepy — it is. But we beat ourselves up when we judge someone too quickly, and want to give people a chance, said Neo.

"There's a difference between being able to be open and vulnerable and able to tell someone 'I like you' ... and someone who is lovebombing you," she said. "So always be very clear, especially in the early stages of the pre-relationship, that it's okay to want to walk away."

Narcissist softbois are lurking on dating apps, just waiting for your guard to fall. So it's important to arm yourself against their tricks so you can work out whether he's actually a predator or just a sensitive guy who wears Doc Martens and really does want to know your favorite Tame Impala song.

In the end, most softbois are 15-year-olds trapped in an adult's body, trying to curate their perfect character and narrative. And that's not really someone you want to get romantically involved with, Neo said.

"When you see patterns emerging, this is the time to question whether this person really is different or pretending to be different," she said. "If you strip down everything, I'll bet the softboi doesn't even like 'Pulp Fiction.'"

Read more:

Here's how victims of narcissists can use the 'gray rock' method when no contact isn't an option

The 4 types of people narcissists are attracted to, according to a psychotherapist

Smart, successful women may be more likely to get 'addicted' to toxic men than others

Narcissistic parents identify their children as either a favourite or a scapegoat, and they pit them against each other

These are the main strengths a narcissist will try to target in you, and how you can protect yourself