Recent studies carried out by the National Bureau of Statistics in China show that about one in five adult women are not married. It seems to be a growing trend in the equally fast developing China. So many women are making strong decisions to deviate from the norm and shun marriage. They would rather face their career and businesses or studies. The reasons are not just limited to these but these ones take the cake.

However this decision has not met all round approval. In fact most of these women are being criticized, made mockery of it even downright persecuted by even their own family members. Sheng Nu (which means "leftover lady") is the derogatory term used to describe such women. Another term is the three S’s: Single, Seventy and Stuck.

China's culture is well rooted in patriarchy and a love for family and breeding and thus when a lady is well into her twenties and is not even thinking of settling down, she begins to look odd to the average Chinese. Her closest family members begin to nag her into getting married and producing kids. And if she refuses she becomes a source of public ridicule as even her own immediate family seem tainted by her action or more appropriately, her inaction. CNN reported recently that seventy percent of female university graduates in China are scared of becoming a Sheng Nu.

It can be said that this palpable rise in unmarried adult Chinese women can be linked to education and the favorable economic situation in the country. In 2013, Forbes magazine reported that eleven out of every twenty self-made women in the world is a Chinese woman. Unlike in the past where women survived on their husband's financial security, women can now own businesses, have a career and live independently without the help of a man or their family members.

I’m quite intrigued that this development is not been applauded in an over populated and increasingly progressive China. It is sad that in this twenty-first century, women are still being put in a box where their relevance to society is only seen in the light of their family or child-bearing skills. Women have waxed strong in education, business, career, politics and so many other areas. To reduce them to only being important when they are wives and or mothers is deeply saddening. They are important, first of all on their own just like every other person is or should be. Their value should not be tied to archaic cultural roles that should have no place in this modern and enlightened world.

Being single is not a curse and a cause for ridicule. People should be allowed to choose for themselves what they want and what suits them and would make them happy. Instead of pushing people into making decisions that might backfire tomorrow. In this way, we can learn to appreciate people for what and who they are instead of who and what we want or need them to be.





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(images courtesy of pixabay)



