Randy Peterson

rpeterson@dmreg.com

Remember back when Jameel McKay wasn’t anything like the Jameel McKay who plays in his first NCAA Tournament Sweet 16 on Friday?

There’s a reason — actually a couple of them — that bad Jameel has become good Jameel, and the 6-foot-9 Iowa State center even tears up when he talks about it.

Thanks to his mother, Dalana, the only parental figure in his everyday life for almost as long as he can remember, McKay is playing the best basketball of his life heading into Friday’s 6:10 p.m. game against the Midwest Region’s top-seeded Virginia at the United Center in Chicago.

Mom, with a hefty assist from coach Steve Prohm, has changed Jameel’s athletic outlook: to give 100 percent on each possession, on each screen he sets, on each rebound he grabs, and on each shot he either swats away or alters.

“I owe them everything,” McKay says now. “They turned me around.”

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It’s not like Jameel was a bad kid; quite the opposite. It’s just that he let his emotions get away from him sometimes.

When things didn’t go like he wanted, he tweeted nasty stuff. When he missed a basket, or fumbled a bad pass, or didn’t get a pass for what he felt was an open shot, fans in the stands and everyone watching on television knew he was upset — but all that’s changed.

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“My mom texted me, actually just last month, that showing my emotion on the court is a weakness,” he told me after helping defeat Iona in the NCAA Tournament’s first round last Thursday in Denver. “I never thought about it like that.

“To me, my emotion was about passion, about wanting to win.”

Mother Knows Best

“I told him to keep smiling,” Dalana said during our telephone interview this week. “I told him to not show emotion. I told him to always remember that your attitude becomes your altitude — it determines how you’re defined for the rest of your life.”

Sometimes ugly body language

Jameel couldn’t see outside of himself. He didn’t see what others were seeing.

He didn’t understand the way people interpreted his every movement, every sour look, every sulky stomping to the bench — all parts of this senior being the most misunderstood player on a very good team.

“My mom told me in a text message to go out there and play your hardest without showing emotion,” McKay said. “That’s what I’ve been doing.”

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He acted out a couple times last week while helping the fourth-seeded Cyclones beat Iona and Arkansas-Little Rock, but it was the good kind of acting out. He was happy for teammates — he popped a happy fist toward the crowd at the Pepsi Center after the Round of 32 win, and when he thought a ref made a bad call, he shrugged it off; he even smiled.

“Whenever I think I’m starting to get emotional, Naz comes up to me and says: 'Remember what your mom said.' ”

McKay is referring, of course, to Naz Mitrou-Long, the nonplaying leader of this team after realizing he hadn’t recovered fully from off-season hip procedures.

“Jameel is the most misunderstood guy around,” Long said. “He’s in a good place right now.”

Mother knows best

"What he was going through, I was going through with him,” said Dalana, who lives in Milwaukee. “When Jameel hurts, I hurt. I told him if he was having a bad day, to go find a teammate and hug him. He’s good now. He’s very good. He’s as happy right now as he’s been in a long, long time."

Peeling back McKay’s curtain

It hasn’t always been that way for this lob-dunking, rim-protecting guy. He hasn’t also been as happy and focused as he is now.

His father, Sean, is in jail. There has been no father-son contact.

“I haven’t spoken to my dad in a while,” Jameel said, his eyes starting to fill with tears. “I can’t even tell you when was the last time.

“Growing up, it was pretty much my mom who was around the most. She’s my everything.”

He played for Hoiberg last season, and that was a great experience, McKay said.

“He’s a players’ guy,” Jameel said.

Fred’s with the Bulls now, you know. Things are different, which is always the situation with coaching changes.

Hoiberg’s late-season practices were nothing more than glorified walk-throughs sometimes — the way it’s done in the pros.

Prohm’s practices aren’t two hours of hellish, physical activity, but there’s no relaxing — and it took a while for McKay to adjust.

He even walked out of a practice after coach and player differed on something. Thoughts of leaving the team crept into his mind, albeit briefly.

“So many people were bashing me — and I didn’t think that was fair,” McKay said. “I’m not a bad guy. Sometimes I just get a little too emotional. It’s because of my passion, nothing else.

“I talked to my mom and thank goodness she wouldn’t let me (leave the team), and I wouldn’t let myself after talking to my mom.

“If my teammates would have turned on me, maybe, but they stayed with me.”

Mother knows best

"We talked,” Dalana said. “I told him he’s come too far. I told him he had a job to do — that his mission wasn’t complete."

Prohm pushed the right button

McKay’s practice squabble — or whatever it was — with Prohm resulted in a two-game suspension. More significant was what followed:

McKay’s awakening.

“Jameel thanked me, because it got his focus to where it needs to be,” Prohm said. “Jameel has been great. He's in a terrific place. Our relationship is at a really good place.”

All true.

“I’m not going to lie and say I agreed with the suspension, but it humbled me,” McKay said. “It brought me closer to my teammates when I was away.

“It helped me get where I am today, sitting here in the locker room talking to you about the NCAA Tournament and life, I can tell you that.

“My numbers have increased since I’ve been back. My teammates consider me one of the leaders on this team.”

In 10 games since the suspension, McKay has 18 blocked shots, averaged 10.1 points and 10.1 rebounds. The Cyclones have won six of those 10 games, and now they’re headed to the Sweet 16.

“When Jameel is right, when he's playing like the best energy guy in college basketball, we're really good,” Prohm said. “He understands that he impacts our team in a positive way when he's focused and when he's locked in.”

And not showing outbursts of negative emotion.

“He’s not a bad kid,” Delana said. “He just needs to be reminded that everyone’s judging him by what he does and his expressions. I can’t stress to him enough that his attitude is his altitude. Right or wrong, it’s how he’s going to be judged.”

Mother knows best.

Cyclones columnist Randy Peterson has been reporting on ISU during the past five decades. Follow @RandyPete.