If you’re a lindy hopper in Australia, chances are you’ve heard of Sam Carroll. Amongst other things, she is the dedicated manager of Swing Dance Sydney, an inspiring teacher, a talented DJ who performs both at home in Sydney and around the country at national exchanges, and an informed and eloquent blogger. Some of you who read this blog will know her personally and some will have been inspired by some of the things she has said and done.

I personally do not know Sam; over the course of the 16+ years in which I’ve been involved with the swing dancing community, we’ve barely crossed paths. I do know however, that Sam has been an influential advocate for positive changes within our community and it is important to note that the following statement is in no way meant to detract from the many great things Sam has inspired, achieved, and accomplished. Rather, it is meant to offer balance, with the intent of helping this fantastic community of ours to continue to grow and develop, providing a safe space for all.

Since January 2017, I have been engaged in legal proceedings for defamation against a small number of people. This blog post concerns one of these cases and so, as the remaining cases are ongoing, most details surrounding these proceedings will be withheld with a view to protecting the privacy and confidentiality of the people involved.

Whilst these past months have been emotionally draining, financially burdening, and traumatic, it is with great relief that I confirm that Sam and I have agreed upon a settlement. Again, I would like to state that details of settlement and the events leading up to it will remain confidential, excluding the following written apology from Sam, which has been made publicly.

In the apology dated 15 August 2017 Sam provides the following statements:

“I, Samantha Jade Carroll, published an email on 23 January 2017 concerning John Saunders”.

“I acknowledge the negative impact the allegations have had on Mr Saunders.”

“I apologise I did not resolve the issue with Mr Saunders before taking further steps.”

“I regret the unfortunate consequences of my email for Mr Saunders.”

Why am I sharing this information?

I want to highlight the importance of creating and maintaining a fair and law-abiding process for handling complaints within our community. We need to create a safe space for everyone; for those who are the victims of an offence, for those wishing to support anyone suffering at the hands of others, and however rarely it happens, for those who may be wrongly accused. As a victim of the latter occurrence, I want to ask you all to be supportive of any victims who do make the brave decision to come forward with a complaint, but to also be vigilant, objective, and fair when handling that complaint, for the benefit of all parties involved. Moving forward, we all need to make sure that we:

Stop gossiping

“Fire and swords are slow engines of destruction, compared to the tongue of a gossip.” – Richard Steele

If a complaint is made, it is only natural to have an emotional reaction to that complaint. Having acknowledged this however, it is vitally important that this emotional reaction be tempered with due process and consideration in order to minimise the chances of misinformation being filtered through our community. We need to have balanced conversations with the people who are involved, we need to make sure that all parties are aware of their rights and obligations, we need to ensure everyone feels safe throughout the process, and we need to provide all parties with the right of reply.

Start using the systems and services available to us

“Asking For Help Reveals Strength, Not Weakness” – Margie Warrell

We should all know about the great services provided by organisations such as Beyond Blue, Lifeline, and Picking up the Peaces. There are so many services, organisations, people, and systems available offering to help us, whether that be with approaching a personal issue ourselves or equipping us to help someone else with their issue.

There are however, limits to how much we can – and should – do ourselves. If the issue being raised is a breach of the law, then this absolutely needs to be raised with the relevant authorities. We, as members of the public, are ill-equipped and without access to the necessary resources required to prudently handle such a matter. For the best interests and well-being of all parties involved, it is important that any such issue be handled by the police, who will then be able to advise our community on how to move forward

Follow due diligence processes

“All things can be deadly to us, even the things made to serve us; as in nature walls can kill us, and stairs can kill us, if we do not walk circumspectly.” – Blaise Pascal

It is not an offence to form an opinion. You may whole-heartedly believe that an allegation is either true or false, but it is important to understand that your opinion will most likely be formed through a personal bias, as is human nature. As such, forming a judgement and acting upon that judgement are two separate concerns and it is important to be cognisant of this fact.

If someone comes to you for help and you chose to help them, make sure you are following a documented due diligence process to protect yourself, the complainant, and the accused.

Without due diligence processes, teachers would believe that the dog ate the homework, parents would believe that the younger sibling spilled the paint on the carpet, and people would believe every allegation that is made against every person.

Understand the impact our actions will have on others

“cause and effect act in webs, not chains.” ― Steve Grand

The financial impact of false allegations can be significant. Not only are there legal fees to consider, but also loss of income in the here and now along with damage to future earnings potential.

Finances aside, consider also the incredible emotional impact false allegations can have on an individual. Do you want to be responsible for leading someone to despair and depression? Do you want to be someone who puts unnecessary pressure on another person’s relationships, both at home and at work? Do you want to cause a member of our community to lose their focus and drive, to see no way out of the situation they find themselves in through no fault of their own, with that loss of self leading potentially to self-harm and suicide? Are you that sure of the information you have been provided with and are you that confident that you are acting without bias?

Show me a person who has never been wrong in their life and I will show you a unicorn. We all make mistakes – make sure that yours, however well intentioned, doesn’t lead to the ruination of an innocent person’s mental health and well-being.

Be compassionate to others

No decent human being sets out to do the wrong thing. Our community is made up of people who share a love of an amazing dance, and that love extends to the people that make up our community. Members of this community have acted in a way to protect both the complainant and our broader community. In this circumstance, the allegations made towards me were unsubstantiated and false, and, as a result, significant harm has been inflicted. Not only upon me, but on the people who love and care for me and who have had to be a part of this journey with me.

I want the swing community to continue to grow and prosper. I want people to continue to find joy in the thing that has brought all of us together. I want every class, event, and occasion hosted by the swing community to be welcoming, warm, and safe, and this is why I’ve written this post.

Keeping in mind the confidentiality surrounding this case and the ongoing defamation cases that are yet to conclude, if anyone would like to have an open discussion about anything I’ve raised in this post, I invite you to reach out to me.