Oath of Gym Membership

The Oath of Gym Membership binds a paladin to the way of getting a ripped body with abnormally large biceps. These paladins are known for never skipping leg day and always striving to get a larger body with more mouscles. Outside of taverns it is rare to see one of these paladins not fighting, trying to get with a person (and failing horribly) or working out. Many who swear this oath are devoted to Broseidon, lord of the brocean. The god of getting better than everyone else at everything. And macros.

Tenets of the Gym Membership

Though the exact words are often soon forgotten, the intention behind them is never truly forgotten

Consistency. Always do workout at least 5 times a week. But do not let other activities suffer for it.

Honesty. Remember to be honest with yourself and your limits. But do not let this hinder you from trying.

Encouragement. Encourage others when they do good work. But remember to also remind them of how impossible it is for them to become like you.

Faultless. Whatever it is, it is not your fault. No, seriously, you can't be the only reason that something went wrong. Not happening.

Macros. Always make sure you eat the food necessary to get good results. But do not say no to unhealthy food or drink every once in a while.

Oath Spells

You gain oath spells at the paladin levels listed.

Oath of Gym Membership Spells

Paladin Level Spells 3rd expeditious retreat, jump 5th knock, enhance ability 9th feign death, meld into stone 13th dominate beast, confusion 17th hold monster, legend lore

Channel Divinity

When you take this oath at 3rd level, you gain the following two Channel Divinity options. You also learn bro speech.

I'm too Good Looking to Die. As an action, you can go down on your knees and use your Channel Divinity to cause all living and nonliving creatures and objects within 30 feet of you to lose interest in you. Creatures that start their turn within the radius must make a Charisma saving throw. On a failed save, they will ignore you for as long as you don't attack them. Objects such as arrows that fly towards you will simply bounce off your chest or miss you completely without causing you harm. This effect lasts until the end of your next turn.

Is it Hot in Here or is it Just Me?. As an action, you can use your Channel Divinity to start flexing and temporarily cause creatures within 60 feet of you to temporarily focus on you. Any creature that starts its turn within this radius must succeed on a Charisma saving throw or become charmed by you. A creature that succeeds on this saving throw becomes angered by you and may start attacking.

Broseidon, Lord of the Sea These Biceps?

By 7th level, your ability to charm other creatures becomes stronger at the cost of always ending up in total failure. Whenever you try to charm a creature that is immune to being charmed, you ignore that creature's immunity. Whenever a creature becomes charmed by you, that charm lasts for 12 seconds instead of the normal duration. At the end of this duration, the creature becomes hostile towards you and can't be charmed by you again until you finish a long rest.

MORE MACROS

Starting at 15th level, you gain a swimming speed of 60 feet and other creatures can't charm you unless you let them.

Beatdown City. Population: Those Guys.

At 20th level, the power which Broseidon has granted you reaches its pinnacle. As a reaction, any condition on you is removed and you become immune to conditions for the next minute. You also score a critical hit on a roll of 15–20 and your attack rolls have advantage.

In addition to this, when a creature reduces you to 0 hit points, you can cast vicious mockery targeting the creature that reduced you to 0 hit points.