BREAKING NEWS: Americans required to add Star of David to U.S. flags by July 4th: Velcro stars available at most post offices

WASHINGTON (USMediaAndIsrael.com) – Last Friday in a special session, Congress passed a bipartisan bill requiring Americans to add Israel’s Star of David to the U.S. flag.

Sen. Dale Wentworth (D-NJ) told reporters from the steps of the Lincoln Memorial:

“The great nation of Israel has real Americanness. In many ways, Israel is already America’s 51st state. Thanks to our foreign aid, Israel’s per capita income rivals our own.”

Citizens who own American flags should proceed to their nearest Post Office to receive their free Star of David patch, which includes a convenient flag-ready VELCRO® backing.

Sen. Wentworth and Rep. Hugh Llewellyn III (R-AL) recently received $25 million in contributions from the Friends of Zionism (FIZ). In response to reporters’ questions, Rep. Llewellyn replied that, unlike the $15 million Presidential candidate Gingrich received from Sheldon Adelson, his money had no strings attached:

“The fact is, Israelis treat Palestinians exactly like we did our American Indians. Israel’s razing of villages, killing innocents, and seizing Palestinian land for their settlers are purely defensive actions. We are trying to deflect international criticism like the disturbing and offensive photo comparison. No one should question the moral authority of the U.S. and Israel.”

GOP nominee Mitt Romney quickly placed calls both to Prime Minister Netanyahu and Sheldon Adelson to express his “deep and profound pleasure” at the bill’s passage.

Israeli officials have made no comment on the Congressmens’ bill, except to say that the Star of David should be placed above the American flag’s other fifty stars.

Postscript: This political satire on the U.S. relationship with Israel was censored by Facebook and — though receiving an enormous response by Daily Kos readers — deleted and banned by the media site. Apparently some organizations find this message too dangerous or too close to home.