In a measure designed to fight racism and intolerance in the the armed forces, the British government yesterday fired the entire British army after a photo emerged of a large group of British soldiers happily posing with "hate speech" liberalist Tommy Robinson.





By posing with Robinson, the "squaddies" were implicitly endorsing the controversial activist's hard-line anti-child-rape views and possibly his admiration for the state of Israel.





As not all the servicemen could be identified, due to the fact that they were wearing similar clothing and all smiling, the Ministry of Defence decided that it would be best to let the entire army go rather than harbour a single Tommy Robinson supporter or sympathiser.





This means that Britain will be temporarily undefended until a new British army that doesn't include any racists can be recruited.





In the meantime, the UK will be defended by a force field constructed by the female Doctor Who and a crack squad of wizards from Hogwarts College, flying on broomsticks and casting spells on any approaching enemy.





Britain's new frontline defenders.