I am generally skeptical about this alleged “fad” of women claiming to be bisexual for attention. There’s a lot of people insisting they know someone one who knows someone who does this but I don’t see much proof that it’s a significant thing. I’m not saying it’s never happened, I just question how common it actually is.

Pretty much the only big example of where somebody actually comes right out and says “I’m not actually bisexual, I just wanted attention” is Nicki Minaj. But I don’t ever see many anecdotes where people say that these women eventually confessed to just wanting attention, it just seems to be assumed that they did.

I think most of this stems from “Oh well she’s never done ____, therefore she must have been faking” (where the blank is whatever arbitrary bullshit standards people have for what constitutes “true” bisexuality and everyone seems to have an opinion on what they think it means) and an ignorance of the sociological reasons for why bisexuals end up in mixed-gender relationships more often, such as homophobia and the simple fact that there are more straight people than gay people.

I think the women who have done this probably find out pretty quickly that the vast majority of the attention it gets you is men perving on you and I doubt they do it for very long.

Also let’s not forget that it’s largely because of pornography that female bisexuality and homosexuality has become “accepted” to the degree that it is. That’s not exactly an industry that women have much control of, and even that acceptance is largely conditional upon how attractive the women in question are considered to be (ever notice how most “lesbian” porn never has butch/masculine women in it?).

Yes, women who pretend to be bisexual to get (male) attention are contributing to a culture of hostility toward bisexual women. But they are also living in a culture that tells them their self-worth is dependent on whether or not men find them attractive and may ignorantly do things that are harmful to others in pursuit of that end. We all do things that prop up systems of oppression without being conscious of it, but it’s easier to see when other people do it. There’s a saying about specks in someone else’s eyes and planks in your own that is pretty apt here. And it’s been mentioned previously how misogynistic these discussions usually are at heart, and how the role of men pressuring women into being sexual with each other for their own entertainment is often overlooked.

Instead of tearing each other down we need to support and educate each other about how forms of bigotry are interconnected and work to change the culture that perpetuates them.