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This story of how a traditional Indian couple embraced their son’s sexuality and threw him a fabulous big gay Hindu wedding has inspired Indian families worldwide.

It is still illegal to be gay in India and homosexuality is still a hugely taboo subject among traditional Indian families.

Which makes Rishi Agarwal’s story all the more powerful.

Despite his parents relocating to Canada in the 1970s, Rishi had a traditional Hindu upbringing and his faith was always extremely important to him. He always wanted a traditional Hindu wedding.


But as a young gay man, he feared he would never be able to have that dream big day and he struggled to come to terms with his identity. A gay Sikh student he knew at high school had committed suicide after his parents refused to accept his homosexuality.

From L to R: Vijay, Rishi, Dan and Sushma (Picture: Sukhbir Channa Photography)

When he finally came out to his parents Vijay and Sushma Agarwal in 2004, the news came as a huge shock. ‘We both were stunned,’ recalls Vijay, 68. Rishi’s mum Sushma, 61, was initially devastated by the news.



But, instead of rejecting him, Rishi’s parents spent the next 72 hours learning as much as they could about the LGBT community. They started attending regular meetings of the Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays chapter in Toronto.

Dan and Rishi met online in 2011 (Picture: Sukhbir Channa Photography)

When Rishi asked them if they wanted him to move out of the family home, his father told him: ‘Absolutely not. You’re still our son and we love you.’ Instead, they blamed their own ‘ignorance’ for their initial reaction. ‘This is strictly our baggage, what we bring from India,’ said Sushma.

And when Rishi met his partner Daniel Langdon in 2011 and decided to get married, his parents threw him the big fat Hindu wedding of his dreams.

(Picture: Sukhbir Channa Photography)

Vijay says he was turned down by seven Hindu priests before he finally found one who agreed to perform the traditional ceremony at a golf course in Oakland.

Undeterred, he ensured his son was married with all the traditional Bollywood trimmings. The grooms performed the standard rituals, including circling a sacred fire four times and exchanging flower garlands, as well getting matching henna tattoos of each other’s initials.

(Picture: Sukhbir Channa Photography)

‘I never thought in my wildest dreams that I could have the wedding that I wanted with the person I loved and with all my family and my friends,’ Rishi told local news channels of his wedding day.

(Picture: Sukhbir Channa Photography)

Rishi and Daniel are sharing their story now to help inspire acceptance and understanding of LGBT issues among the Indian community. Because the community needs more parents like the Agarwals and more fabulous big gay Hindu weddings.

‘In order to run a lot of those ceremonies, you really need everyone, the community’s involvement, otherwise it doesn’t really work,’ said Rishi. ‘Unfortunately, others have not had that support in their lives.’

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