TWT #161 –

On June 10th, 1190, while leading his army during the Third Crusade, Frederick I, Holy Roman Emperor, fell off his horse and drowned in a river that was 2 feet deep.

King of Germany

King of Italy

King of Burgundy

Holy Roman Emperor

Drowned in a River

All descriptors of Frederick I.

Ahhhh, maybe he couldn’t swim because his head was ACTUALLY made of gold?

Frederick I, also known as Frederick Barbarossa, did accomplish a lot in his life. He is considered by real historians to be among the greatest leaders of the Holy Roman Empire and is lauded for his contributions to European culture and society.

BUT, all that a Terrible Historian sees is the fact that this dude drowned in 2 feet of water…

Lets’ focus some of our energy on the Third Crusade.

The Second Crusade didn’t end too well for the Crusaders (not surprising, seeing as how we get like 4 more installments), and they retreated in 1149. Several years after that, the sultan Saladin decided to reconquer the lands that those Crusader HAD taken. Eventually Saladin retook Jerusalem in 1187 and that pissed the European powers off BIG TIME.

Pope Urban III was rumored to have collapsed and died immediately upon hearing the news about Saladin’s success. The new Pope, Gregory VIII, declared that Saladin was God’s punishment on the European people for their sins, and immediately the call for a new Crusade went out.

Taking Jerusalem in 1187 got the European’s so mad that they actually put down their arms against each other to Crusade together. King Henry II of England and King Philip II of France were in a war between themselves when they heard the call for a Crusade.

They immediately put down their arms… and then took up arms to head south.

(Europeans LOVED Crusades).

Unfortunately for Saladin, King Henry II died in July of 1189, meaning the English troops were then under the command of his son, Richard the Lionheart (one of the most badass titles bestowed upon anyone in the history of history).

And so, with France and England heading south, our hero Frederick I threw his hat in the ring as well. Some historian in the 1220’s claimed that Frederick amassed an army of 100,000 men with 20,000 knights. Alas, that person was probably Frederick’s best friend / hype man, and other sources say he had about 15,000 troops.

Regardless, Frederick started the Crusade on a solid footing, leading his men across Anatolia, and making peace with a Hungarian prince.

However, on this fateful day exactly 829 years ago today. Frederick was on horseback crossing a river that was barely waste-high, when he was thrown from the horse, held down by armor, and drowned.

A depiction of Frederick drowning

I posit the question: where were all of his troops?

How the heck did no one notice that their King and commander had fallen from horseback? Wasn’t he surrounded by his own troops? Why didn’t anyone help him?

“Seriously, why didn’t anyone help me? Also, why am I naked?”- Frederick

Aside from that, this is seriously an embarrassing way to go! Frederick was 68 years old, a veteran of many battles and a strong leader. If anyone had to guess how this guy would bite it, they would put their money on war, not water. What a sad and disappointing end to his tale.

Not only that, his death was partially responsible for this Crusade not fulfilling it’s mission. When Frederick died, the majority of his German troops lost morale and went home instead of rallying behind Frederick’s son. With the German’s nearly out of the fight, it came down to France and England, who apparently hadn’t really settled the score from before the Crusade. France eventually bailed, and so the Lionheart was forced to continue the mission on his own. The English did win some big battles in the later parts of the Crusade, but were unable to achieve their goal of winning back Jerusalem.

All thanks to that dumb river and Frederick’s inability to swim.

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