Model Ashley Alexiss on Why Plus Size Lingerie is Empowering

Ashley Alexiss is one of the most prominent plus size models in the world. The curvy size 14 model also appears on the packaging of much of Spencer’s plus size lingerie.

She’s amassed over 2 million followers on her social media channels, puts out an annual calendar, and was a 2019 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue finalist. On her Instagram account, she can often be found sporting all manner of plus size lingerie, from teddies to corsets and beyond, always looking incredible.

In this exclusive interview, we asked Ashley Alexiss why she loves Spencer’s lingerie, how to find the right lingerie for your body type, and how to rock your plus size lingerie like the hot babe you are!

Spencer’s: What’s special about Spencer’s lingerie?

Ashley Alexiss: The great thing about Spencer’s lingerie is that they are actually inclusive, which I think is so important. They go from regular size to plus size and I think it’s really special because everybody deserves to feel sexy. It doesn’t matter your size, it doesn’t matter your body shape. You still deserve to feel like your most beautiful, your most sexy; you deserve to be able to want to show yourself off regardless.

I think that’s super important, and having a brand believe in that, and believe in that with their lingerie that they put forth is something that I really respect, because they’re not just making lingerie. They’re not just taking something and then making it bigger; they’re actually accommodating to your shape and if you are plus size, their plus size lingerie really complements your curves. It highlights the areas that you may find unflattering and it accentuates the things that you really want to accentuate.

It’s all about confidence, and I believe that Spencer’s lingerie definitely has that in the forefront. Just bring out someone’s confidence in the best way that we can. Plus you have great quality which obviously matters. I’ve always been all about quality over quantity, and any brand that does that is something I can fully endorse.

Spencer’s: What does it feel like to wear Spencer’s plus size lingerie?

Ashley Alexiss: With Spencer’s lingerie, there’s all different fun aspects to it, whether you have a nice soft lace—which, lace is always my go-to, especially being plus, because it just sits on your skin. It doesn’t dig in, it doesn’t cause any unsightly lines that you don’t want. It’s very comfortable and it’s a confidence booster. I think that lace is so sexy no matter how you incorporate it.

Then you also have your traditional babydolls. Those are a win/win no matter what. The fact that Spencer’s actually cares about the quality of their fabrics and things that are used in the lingerie that they sell, you can tell. It’s not something that is going to fall apart, it’s not something you have to worry about that’s a one and done. You get your money’s worth out of it and it shows; you can feel it.

Spencer’s: How does Spencer’s cater to plus size women with its lingerie?

Ashley Alexiss: With the plus size lingerie that Spencer’s offers, I think what’s really great is that they really accentuate the curves of a plus body. They don’t try and offer anything that would be unflattering. Sometimes you can have things that dig into you. Sometimes you can have things that don’t necessarily fit a plus body properly, but Spencer’s really does it right—for instance, to have a nice cup, that you can fit and feel supported and pushed up in.

You have some nice cutouts that help draw your attention toward an area that you may want to accentuate. It’s really important that they utilize some ringlets, you have some lace, special, flirty, feminine things that obviously a woman would want in their lingerie, especially a plus woman. Spencer’s doesn’t hold back.

Spencer’s: How can women of any size find the right lingerie for their body type? Are certain pieces of lingerie more flattering on different body types?

Ashley Alexiss: I definitely feel like there are obviously lingerie types that I personally like for my plus size body, but I don’t really think that any person needs to restrict themselves. If it makes you feel good, that’s all that matters. Who cares what anyone else says? My personal favorites for a plus body are seamless, because they don’t dig into you at all.

Some of them are cute dresses, some of them are cute teddies. I don’t believe that a plus size person should restrict themselves to whatever anybody says is a good lingerie for their body. If it makes you feel good, then wear it. I truly believe that whatever brings out your confidence, then that’s what you should wear happily, no matter if someone says it’s right or wrong.

For my plus size body, I believe that what’s most flattering is seamless. They come in dresses, teddies, they’re awesome and they’re usually very affordable, and they complement you so well because there’s no seam and there’s nothing to dig into you. You almost look like you have it painted on and I think that is really, really sexy, especially for someone with some curves. It just shows off every bit of you.

You kind of look in the mirror, like yeah, that’s me, I look frickin’ awesome. That’s my personal favorite, but in terms of what a plus size person should wear in regards to lingerie, whatever makes you feel most confident.

Spencer’s: How does lingerie specifically make plus size women feel sexy?

Ashley Alexiss: I often get questions from women about how to feel better about their body. I’m plus size. How do you wear lingerie and feel good about yourself? And I believe it’s not something that happens overnight. It’s not like you wake up one morning and go, I love myself. It’s something that takes a lot of time, especially in a society that tells you it’s wrong to feel good about your body no matter what size you are.

Their opinions don’t pay your bills and you just have to constantly remind yourself of that. You need to remember that it’s about your happiness. If you feel good in something, then feel good in it. If you feel good in a crop top, just because someone says, for instance, with my size, I can’t believe someone who’s a size 14 is wearing a crop top, how dare she? I didn’t know that what I was wearing is affecting you. You can take that and you can do what you want with it. I’m going to be in what I want to be because I feel good in it. I think it goes for any clothing, including lingerie. It’s really important for women to use trial and error. See what you feel good in. There are lots of different kinds of lingerie. You can start with something a little more conservative. If you’re not comfortable with your body, try something that covers it up just a little bit more, and slowly go from there. There’s even pieces of lingerie that come with different pieces; some have a little cape, or some have a skirt and you can take it off and see how you feel. Eventually you’ll just get to a point where it’s no effs given. You know what? This is my life. I’m going to live it the best that I can. If that means that I’m wearing a crotchless teddy, then that’s what I’m going to do.

It’s hard for me to truly express that because I just want to shake someone. You’re beautiful, it doesn’t matter what your size is. If you want to feel good, then feel good. You can own this, so please do. It’s hard because a lot of women do ask me, how do I feel confident? How do I feel good in lingerie? How do I make myself look better? It’s not about that. It’s about just feel it. Just try. You don’t get anywhere if you don’t try. That’s most important.

Spencer’s: For a lot of women, being naked makes them feel self-conscious. Can lingerie make you feel more confident about your body especially if being naked makes you a little uncomfortable?

Ashley Alexiss: I definitely believe that lingerie is a lot more powerful than people actually realize. It has the ability to allow you to be comfortable in your body by simply having this small piece of clothing that just accentuates the things that you want and hides the things that maybe you don’t really want to be seen. It allows you to become more confident with less clothing and eventually you can get to the point where [you’re in] your birthday suit and you can feel good.

I know that it’s such a struggle because we’re brainwashed to believe that there’s this one perfect body and if your body doesn’t look like that then you’re not worth anything. I’m so blessed to do what I do, and I love what I do, but a lot of times plus size models are my body type. I have an hourglass and a flat stomach. But at the end of the day, that doesn’t mean that if you don’t, that you’re not beautiful.

It doesn’t mean that you can’t be confident in your own skin, your own naked body. You need to stop comparing yourself to what you see on social media, television and magazines, because they’re depicting one kind of woman and if we know anything, we know that women come in all shapes, sizes, and colors. Just because they’re not being depicted in the media doesn’t mean that they’re not beautiful.

The same thing goes for being confident in your body. If you look at yourself and you say, okay, I wish I could change this, I wish I could change that, and you wonder why and you’re comparing yourself to the things that you see, you need to sit there and you need take it in and realize that you are you, and that’s something nobody can be. Once you realize that, you’re able to use that to your power.

This is where lingerie can come in, even if it’s just for yourself. You don’t need to wear lingerie for a partner. I mean, there’s plenty of times where I was a little bit younger and I would just buy lingerie because I wanted to learn how to feel better about my body.

I didn’t really understand because my body was never really depicted. Growing up, I never saw anybody that had my body in mainstream [media], and I wanted to feel good about myself. I didn’t want to sulk and feel bad. I wanted to know that I was enough and I felt good and I looked sexy and I was sexy enough to attract a partner. Now that I’m older, I realize that that’s not necessarily important.

Just try things. There’s lots of affordable lingerie, there’s shops such as Spencer’s where you can go in, you can try the quality, you can see how different things fit your body and not break the bank. People think that they have to spend hundreds of dollars on some of these high-end brands to get quality. No, you don’t. Spencer’s does a good job of that. They’re able to give the quality of a higher-end brand without breaking the bank.

Try on styles and figure out what works for you and what doesn’t. You have to realize that no one else has to see that if you don’t want them to. It’s up to you. You create a relationship with yourself, and when you have that relationship and you’re secure in that relationship then you can move forward with sharing that with someone else.

Spencer’s: With lingerie, I know some women are concerned about, what if my partner rejects me or isn’t as into it as I thought they would be. Do you have any advice?

Ashley Alexiss: If you try to be sexy for your partner and they don’t appreciate it, throw the whole partner away. There’s no time for that because I think that it’s not just about being sexy, it’s the effort that you put behind it, it’s the effort of you are being vulnerable and you are taking a chance to try and share this sensual moment with someone and if they’re going to sit there and go, Oh god, why’d you wear that? or Oh, that’s not my favorite color, no normal partner, no supportive partner, no non-toxic partner will do that, and if they do, like I said, throw the whole partner away. And if they do, I’m really sorry for anyone who’s having this issue because I’m telling you basically to [dump them] but in a year’s time it won’t matter you’ll probably be with someone who makes you feel a lot better about yourself.

Spencer’s: Do you have any advice for a woman who’s new to wearing lingerie, she’s excited about it, about how to style it or what to do, how to feel comfortable walking around in it—or lying down in it.

Ashley Alexiss: We’re told all the time that we need to be careful about what we put on our phones, but listen, if you want to feel good about yourself, I suggest getting into some sexy lingerie and taking some photos. That’s kind of a good way to ease it in with your partner. Send some cute sexts in lingerie.

I think that sometimes being in lingerie can be sexier than being naked. If you’re new to it, I think that becoming confident in it is about seeing the reflection of yourself. Use selfies to find out what angles make you feel best in that lingerie. It’s all about exploring yourself and I think that women are so afraid of that aspect because we’re told that we’re not supposed to. But you have no rules. If it makes you feel good then screw what any other opinion is. You should definitely give yourself more credit for trying something new.

Spencer’s has a huge range of affordable sexy lingerie, including plus size lingerie, in every color and style!