For some reason I totally do not understand, some people actually seemed to like this, so I guess I'll keep posting.

Also, maybe I should've mentioned before, but this story is about Roman and Ruby. Baked Alaska will be happening, but they're not the main focus.

2. Vendetta

Ruby descended from the airship, and made her way over to the bakery. It was quite the déjà vu, to be once again heading to that place she now dreaded, after the events of two days before, but this time she wasn't supposed to be on a blind date with maniacs. It would just be her and her sister, a cordial meeting between siblings, so Yang could make it up to her for the fiasco. It was quite unlike her to be guilt-tripping her sister like so, but she would never turn down such an easy way to get free cookies, no matter how sleazy the methods.

As she found the entrance, her silver eyes spotted a familiar sight of a ginger man in a white suit. Just how many white suits did he have? Ruby always wore similar apparel herself, but it was a combat garment, so it was understandable. The master-criminal had no such excuse.

"Roman." She said curtly, nodding ever so slightly.

"Red." He responded in kind, as displeased by the sudden run-in as she was.

"Taking a break from kicking puppies?"

"Very funny. You take after your sister, I see."

As their exchange was about to end, the scythe-wielder moving on to await her sibling, a waitress approached the table with an envelope in hand, cutting off her escape.

"Sir, ma'am, I've been instructed to deliver this to you." She handed the letter to Torchwick, who made no motion to pick it up whatsoever.

"I think this is a mistake, we're not here together."

"Oh, that's strange, I was told to give it to, and I quote, 'a cutesy red-hooded girl and a ginger man whose fashion sense is still stuck twenty years ago.' Not a lot of our clients really match the description."

"Hey, this outfit is quite stylish, thank you very much!" Roman interjected, but no one paid attention to his offended state.

"Let me guess, it was a blonde woman with too much cleavage that said this to you?" Ruby felt slightly insulted as well. She wasn't cutesy! She was a hard-trained killing machine! Huntresses aren't cute, they're badass!

"With a bi-colored little girl at her arm, yes. Quite lovely, although kind of quiet now that I think about it…"

The pair of customers traded a disgruntled but worried look. Those two pulling the rug from under their feet was not a good sign. Roman picked up the paper, and the employee excused herself, not desiring to pry on their private business. He then read it out loud.

"Dear family,

After seeing how little you two get along, we thought it best to let you have some time to get to know each other. We're sure you can put your differences apart at least once.

With love,

Baked Alaska

PS. Ruby, I know where you keep your stash of sweets, so you'd better play nice.

PSS. Same goes for you and your scotch, Roman."

"Baked Alaska? Isn't that the recipe for ice cream on fire?" The criminal was confused by the letter, and his question took hold before his anger could.

"Ugh. That sounds exactly the kind of pun Yang would come up with. So I guess we're stuck with each other, huh?"

"Didn't the exact same thing happen already? They could at least try to be a little more original."

They attempted to make small talk over coffee, but nothing seemed to pick up. There was nothing they had in common to talk about. As time dragged on, they were both getting more and more annoyed, and next to no progress had been made in mending the bridges between them. That is, until Torchwick came up with a brilliant idea.

"Look, Red, I don't want to be here, and I'm guessing you feel the same." Ruby nodded in agreement, allowing him to proceed. "This has gone on for long enough, I think it's time we do something about it."

"What are you saying?"

"Revenge, my dear. I'm saying we get back at those two for trying to cross us." There was a perverse smile on his face as he uttered the words.

"All right, as long as no one gets hurt, I'm in. I assume you have something in mind?" The look Roman was giving her was of distressing resolution, so she figured he would go forward with or without her. The least she could do was making sure there were no fatal mishaps.

"Don't underestimate me, darling. I'm called a criminal mastermind for a reason. I just need some more info on your lovely sister."

And so they plotted their vendetta all through the morning, butting heads about the details. Once they had been given a point of focus, the interactions between the two went much more smoothly. The huntress was surprised to realize how well they worked together, despite their history as enemies.

Torchwick walked in the room with two pairs of metallic shackles. The red-hooded girl was busy setting up the stage for their play, and she barely noticed his sudden appearance. When he spoke, she jumped up in surprise.

"Got the handcuffs you asked for. What do you even need them for?" The plan had been designed by the pair, but in truth Ruby had been the one to dominate the conspiracy, and some of the details had been kept a surprise even from her partner. The ginger wasn't too comfortable with it, but he decided to let her run wild, doing his part to be amenable. He did not want to be apart from his scotch, especially right then when he so desperately needed a drink. Plus, it was rather nice to see the redhead so invested in the revenge, it was like watching (and overseeing) the origin of a new recruit for the criminal underworld.

"We're going to trap them by one of their feet inside the bathroom, and leave them alone with a handsaw. Then they'll need to decide what they value the most, a foot or freedom. But we'll be right outside, so they won't actually get hurt or anything, it's just psychological warfare. Don't worry, I saw this is a movie!"

What kind of movies has this girl been watching? Roman was both frightened and delighted by how unbelievably twisted the plan was. And it was even fairly solid, much to his surprise. Maybe he still had a chance at turning to huntress to the dark side after all. Just imagine what we could achieve with my mentoring.

He helped in everything he could, and even managed to sneak in some improvements of his own. The Great Roman Torchwick wouldn't be reduced to a grunt doing the heavy lifting, if he wasn't to lead the assault he would at least make sure the work was up to his standards. There would be no chance of failing. Well, not until Ruby decided to put her foot down on one matter.

"I'm just saying, we shouldn't put them just next to each other, they might get frisky, and then there goes all your psychological warfare."

"But if we put them on opposite sides, they'll think we're trying to break them apart! Besides, they're in a bathroom and handcuffed to the wall, it's not exactly a romantic setting..." The scythe-wielder was adamant, nothing could bend her will.

Torchwick sighed in defeat. Is it possible that she really doesn't know what handcuffs are used for? Besides arresting, of course... Not that he had a lot of experience with it, naturally, his way of life had earned him a taste for freedom.

At that point he wasn't as excited about the payback itself as he'd been before. He would never admit it even to himself, but he actually had a little bit of fun with the preparations. Not being chased by the cops, or threatened by Cinder apparently allowed to take more pleasure in what he did. And perhaps the prankster had been right all along, the red-hued huntress wasn't so bland and uninteresting at all. There was more to the wannabe hero than met the eye, and it was a puzzling thing to unravel. Could we end up getting along like Neo wanted?

He shook his head to dismiss the thought, ashamed of himself for the blantant sentimentaly. A great mastermind like him shouldn't get emotional, he just needed to focus on the plan.

And said plan was executed to perfection, all that was left were the victims. Roman lured Neo in with a promise of ice cream, and she didn't mention the shady part of town they were in, used to much worse. Neither was she at all bothered with the blindfold that was place above her eyes, she might have even giggled during the process. The cold-blooded killer was infinitely more playful when with him, they had been partners for so long they were practically brother and sister, even despite their age gap.

He told her to sit down and wait while he went to get the forementioned desert, and left the room. Where was the Red and her sister? They were supposed to have arrived by then...

Like clockwork, as soon as he took out his scroll - right before he realized he didn't have her number - the sniper arrived, carrying the blonde with effort over the shoulder. His jaw dropped. Yang was unconscious.

"What the hell did you do to her?"

"I may have spiked her coffee..." Ruby confessed with a guilty look, like a child caught stealing candy. "She was going to see through me, it was the only way I could get her here!"

"This was supposed to be a prank but now we've gone up to drugging and kidnapping." He scratched his chin retorically, and then conjured up his sleaziest smile. "I gotta say, I like your style."

"Yeah, yeah, don't be weird, just help me get her in place."

They laid the blonde by her girlfriend's side, and proceeded to handcuff them by the foot. Torchwick walked out, while his cohort slapped Yang so she'd wake up. Just as she was coming to her senses, Ruby activated her semblance to disappear from the bathroom, not before removing Neo's blindfold, with a trail of rose petals that would be hard to see in the dimly lit space.

With the door closed, they waited, giving the trap time to work its magic. When the initial nervousness faded - well, Ruby's, there was no way the redheaded man would ever be stressed about something so trivial - they began talking about this and that, and conversation actually worked that time. Ploys were the best way to create bonds, they were the way Roman had met and befriended some of the best men the White Fang had to offer, like Perry and... he couldn't remember the names of the others, but it wasn't important, the point stood.

After a few minutes passed, neither of them knew how many, sounds started coming out from the door. The scythe-wielder jumped at the novelty, and pressed her ear against the metallic surface, trying to distinguish the noises. Torchwick stared expectantly for any new information.

"I can't hear a thing. They're talking, but I can't seem to make out any words. It's almost like their just groaning..."

Oh no...

"Well, maybe... Wait, Red, what are you doing?" The girl was grabbing the door handle, ready to twist it and go inside. Which was, on all accounts, a horrible idea.

"I'm going in, I need to know what they're saying. They could be in trouble!"

"I don't think you should..." He interjected, but it was too late. She opened the entrance, and her eyes shot wide open. She froze for a second, words failing to leave her mouth.

"Oh... Ew." Ruby took a step back and closed the door hurriedly, leaving the lovebirds none the wiser. She still looked rather shaken, her back against the metal and her breath irregular. "Sooo... Our plan didn't work."

"Yeah I think I got that, sweetie, spare me the details." He was slightly annoyed that all the work had been for nothing, spoiled by a rookie mistake. That was why he liked being in charge, amateurs always screwed up. Honestly, failing to foresee that outcome, just how innocent could one huntress be?

"Maybe I should've gotten a dead body..." The silver-eyed sniper was mumbling to herself.

A dead body? What the... seriously, what kind of movies has she been watching?!

"Well, there's always next time..."

She smiled at his attempt to be encouraging.

"Definitely. Next time we'll get them."

If you have ideas about situations that'd be interesting to put Ruby and Roman in, feel free to send them to me. I have already written up to chapter 4, but I'm sure I can squeeze them in somewhere. This is not a story-heavy fic, so I can have flexibility about what happens in the future.



Props to anyone (probably everyone) who understood which movie I was shamelessly ripping off. As always, please review or comment, because I'm sure this could really use constructive criticism.