CHAPTER 5: PROFESSIONAL MURDER TOOLS

DAKIMAKURA

SURPRISE, ♥♥♥♥♥♥. THOSE WEAPONS ALL SUCK. LIKE YOU'D WANT TO USE A ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ CLUB WITH NAILS IN IT? SURE YOU WOULD, IF YOU'RE A COMPLETE ♥♥♥♥HEAD. WELL, THEN YOU PROBABLY WANT TO KNOW WHAT WEAPONS YOU'LL BE USING THEN, YOU DUMB ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥? LET ME INTRODUCE YOU TO THE FAMILY.OF MURDERERS.THIS BEAUTIFUL PIECE OF METAL AND WOOD IS A ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ BULLET FACTORY. IMAGINE IF YOU COULD JUST LAUNCH TEARS OUT OF YOUR FACE AT LIGHT SPEED AFTER YOU SPILLED TEA ALL OVER YOUR ♥♥♥♥♥♥CHINESE CARTOON BODY PILLOW AND KILL PEOPLE WITH YOUR SADNESS NOBODY ♥♥♥♥♥♥ CARES ABOUT. THAT'S WHAT USING A SCATTERGUN IS LIKE. LAUNCHING SADNESS AT YOUR ENEMIES IN THE FORM OF LEAD.CAPABLE OF FIRING 6 TEAR BASED LEAD ROUNDS WITHOUT RELOADING. ARE YOU EVEN TRYING, FORCE-A-NATURE???I COULD JUST SMELL YOUR WHINING FROM HERE. "BUT I JUST WANT TO DODGE BULLETS BY USING SOME ENERGY BEVERAGES, WHY WOULD I WANT TO USE A PISTOL? ;_;"WHAT, START RUNNING AWAY FROM BULLETS, INSTEAD OF JUST STOPPING THEM ALL TOGETHER? ARE YOU SOME KIND OF ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ BRAIN DEAD FRENCHMAN?THIS ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ POCKET ROCKET IS CAPABLE OF FIRING 12 HOT LEAD LOADS ALL OVER YOUR ENEMIES WITHOUT A RELOADCRITS? 45 DAMAGE PER BULLET?I WOULD CALL THIS THE SCOUT'S COUP DE GRACE BUT I'M NOT ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ SPANISHCONSIDERING THIS THING IS CAPABLE OF SWINGING LIKE SEVEN TRILLION TIMES A SECOND AND SUCKING 40 HEALTH OUT OF YOUR TARGET EVERY HALF SECOND, YOU BETTER START CONSIDERING YOURSELF A MAJOR LEAGUE ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥' VACCUM.37.5% FASTER THAN YOUR ♥♥♥♥♥♥ HUSBANDO'S KNIFE? YOU BETTER START PRAYING TO VISHNU, YOU ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥.