If you didn't already know that WFAA-TV (Channel 8) had a new traffic reporter, chances are by Friday you'd at least heard Demetria Obilor's name.

That's thanks to a body-shaming Facebook post that went viral, in which a viewer complained about how Obilor dresses her non-Size 6 frame.

Obilor's Twitter clapback, filled with positivity and self-appreciation, created a national firestorm, with thousands of tweets coming to the anchor's defense.

Addressing the haters, showing love to my ppl 💗 and thank you @chancetherapper 💯 pic.twitter.com/ks2cTSuLLe — Demetria Obilor (@DemetriaObilor) November 3, 2017

Ironically, the viewer, Jan -- who said she'll never watch Channel 8 again -- has brought Obilor and the station a legion of new fans.

We're all the better for it.

You see, Obilor doesn't look like a lot of other TV anchors. She's got curves; she rocks her naturally curly hair. More importantly, she seems quite comfortable and confident in being her authentic self.

How refreshing. There needs to be room for diversity of all kinds.

That the public rebuke came from a woman added another level of sadness. Not that it's surprising: Some of the harshest and ugliest jabs at women have long come from other women.

That somehow feels worse. This phenomenon sparked a lively conversation in one of the women's discussion groups I belong to, when one of my colleagues posed the question:

Why does this happen?

Some women have bought into society's push for perfection -- that somehow women need to fit into some impossible ideal of what women are supposed to look like.

It's Demitria Obilor getting the brunt of it today. It was singer Kelly Clarkson last week. You and me tomorrow.

But it's disheartening. It's cruel and unhelpful. We've gotta talk about this stuff and figure out how to stop it. The mean-girl messages we're sending to our daughters are disturbing.

A quick Google search reveals countless psychological studies about some possible causes. Too few good jobs for women, too few mates considered suitable, only a handful of top spots. It breeds insecurity and jealousy about what we perceive are our own shortcomings. Women are thrown into competition fighting for too few opportunities.

And "women are no more immune to the effects of sexism and misogyny than are men," someone said in our discussion group.

How true.

I just finished the new memoir We're Going To Need More Wine by actress Gabrielle Union that's made The New York Times best-seller list. In it, she reflected on a party she attended where she proceeded to tear a younger actress to shreds over her appearance.

Gabrielle Union once tore younger actresses to shreds ... until a friend prompted her to reconsider her actions. (Aurora Rose / The Associated Press)

A friend pulled her aside and asked if doing that made her feel any better. Did it get her any new parts or advance her career? Did it achieve anything constructive at all?

She had to admit that it did none of those things. So she vowed to stop. She's found more joy in helping other women than brutally tearing them apart.

We could all use some of that reflection.

Thank goodness I've got a strong squad of women around me who share in each other's successes and speak their own worth whenever possible.

Get yourself a circle of positive women who aren't afraid to check you when they hear you putting another woman down. Do the same for them. Focus on your own accomplishments instead of comparing yourself to others.

There's power in lifting each other up.

Now back to Jan and other "haters" who started this whole Obilor controversy. Though I'm skeptical of Jan's contention that she didn't notice Obilor was black, I don't buy that her criticism was necessarily racially motivated. Yes, Jan's white and Obilor is not, with a style we don't see on TV news every day. But Lord knows some of the most vicious takedowns of women of color have come from other women of color. Just like some of the most brutal attacks on white women have come from other white women.

I'm most bothered that we don't seem to attach the same high value to the Size 16 woman as we do the Size 6 woman. And all this focus is on how she dresses. I've seen very little discussion about whether Obilor is actually any good at her job reporting on traffic, for example. That's troubling.

Look, for the record, this isn't Obilor's first TV gig. Criticism comes with the territory. So, she understands that her appearance matters. (She's drop-dead gorgeous, by the way.) But isn't it between her and WFAA to decide what's appropriate for her to wear?

Obviously, her new employers saw something in her that they think viewers will embrace. I, for one, hope they do so in droves.

Tune in one morning. She's got personality to spare. I think she's a breath of fresh air.

Leona Allen is a Dallas Morning News editorial board member. Twitter: @ldallen

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