I've been meaning to write you for some time, but the events of Christmas Eve finally compelled me to action. It's not cool that you broke Derek Carr's leg. What the hell was that? It didn't make sense from a logic standpoint. That dude loves God. But instead of Carr and his upstart Raiders vanquishing the Patriots in the Tuck Rule Revenge Game we've waited 15 years for, you have the man down on the turf pointing to his formerly functional appendage and barking "It's broke!" six times. Was that one for each of your gods? How fun that must have been for you.