This time every year, festival-goers – celebrities included – begin assembling the perfect music festival outfits. I'm convinced there's an unspoken competition of who's the most bohemian goddess-like of them all (Vanessa Hudgens usually wins). You're bound to see an array of cutoff booty shorts, crochet bikini tops, face paint, flower crowns, and, unfortunately, headdresses. But despite the flood of articles written on the matter, I don't think most people who wear headdresses (also known as warbonnets) for whatever occasion know how offensive this is. I, for one, didn't.

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You see, I once made the same mistake. It wasn't my intention to look like an insensitive asshole, but that's what ended up happening.

I'm a member of the Muscogee (Creek) Nation, but I spent the better part of my youth uneducated about my Native American heritage. I knew that my last name meant "big horse" and my grandpa was the treasurer of the Otoe-Missouria tribe, but that was about it. My dad and grandpa have always been involved in the traditions and practices, but I didn't take part because I didn't want to be different from my friends.

So a few years ago, I put on a headdress and took a photo. It belonged to my great- great-grandfather, but my dad has it now. It's the most incredible piece of art I've ever seen in person. When I held it for the first time, I was in awe of the intricate beadwork and embroidery, and how delicate the spotted and golden eagle feathers were. I saw it as a family heirloom, so I put it on for a minute and took a picture. I had no idea at the time that by doing so, I was disrespecting my own heritage, culture, traditions — and gender.

From cultural appropriation to the reinforcement of stereotypes, there are countless reasons why people shouldn't wear headdresses, but what most people don't know is that, by tradition, women do not typically wear full warbonnets. These are reserved for respected elders and men who have earned the right to wear them. This is probably a shocker to you because lately in pop culture, women tend to wear them more often than men. Whether it's on runways, magazine covers, or music videos, the imagery of sexy women wearing headdresses is everywhere. But a woman wearing a headdress is offensive. A woman dressed as a "sexy Indian," as costume shops market headdresses, and wearing a headdress is extremely offensive. I would soon come to learn this.

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After I took the photo, I posted it on Facebook and went about my young, ignorant life. I got a lot of likes and comments saying how cool it was, but I didn't really think about it again until a couple of months later, when I was skimming through my Facebook feed and saw something a female family member of mine posted:

As soon as I saw it, my stomach sank. I was completely embarrassed that I had posted a picture of myself wearing a headdress, but I was more ashamed that I had no idea of the deeper meaning behind what I was doing. I immediately did some researching online and found that the facts on the graphic were painfully true. According to the Justice Department, 1 out of every 3 Native American women has been raped or experienced attempted rape, and the rate of sexual assault against Native American women is more than twice the national average. I didn't wear the headdress for long, a couple minutes at most, and I didn't wear it with a bra top either. But the fact that I, a woman, wore one at all was enough to do damage. I thought about all my Facebook friends who saw the photo and felt inspired to take a similar picture or maybe even wear one to a festival or dress up as a "sexy Indian" for Halloween. I was so disappointed in myself. I saw so many photos soon after that of girls dressing up in cute, skimpy, fake-suede fringe outfits and feathers, thinking it was fun and harmless. I know they didn't realize that by dressing as a "sexy Indian," they were sexualizing a group of women who are victims of sex crimes and already devastatingly sexualized.

I didn't know that by wearing that headdress years ago, I was tapping into some deeply rooted issues that our country's native people have been suffering through for many years. I simply thought it was cool and wanted a photo. Much like anyone else who has ever worn one without earning the right to wear one.

If you have plans to go to a festival this year, I beg you not to pick up that cheap, synthetic headdress and to opt for completely inoffensive accessories instead. I'm all for people being free at festivals and not caring what other people think about them and their outfit choices (That's the point of dressing up at a festival anyway, right?), but I only hope that you learn from my mistakes and not do so at the expense of other women. Besides, I hear flower crowns are in style this year.

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Brooke Shunatona Brooke Shunatona is a contributing writer for Cosmopolitan.com.

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