10 Things Every New Parent Goes Through in Their First Year

The arrival of a newborn is a life changing experience for new parents and over the first year of your baby’s life, you and your baby will go through an exciting period of enormous change. This first year will be full of surprises, a combination of incredibly special moments and some tough times as you adjust to this brand new chapter of your life together.

The Car Seat Challenge

Having purchased a car seat, every new parent will discover that installing this seemingly straightforward piece of equipment can be completely baffling at times.

Choosing the correct car seat for your baby and fitting it correctly will protect your child from harm, should something go wrong so it is essential to make sure that the seat is fitted correctly and the baby is securely strapped in.

Have an expert show you how to fit the seat correctly at the point of purchase and keep the manufacturer’s instructions close by in case you need to refer back to them. This task is not always as easy as it looks, particularly when you are strapping in an older baby who is keen on wriggling or protesting!

Sleep Debt

A newborn may sleep for as much as 18 hours each day, which sounds like an awful lot, but with a small tummy, your baby will only sleep for three to four hours at a time in between feeds, so interrupted nights are inevitable in the first few months and many hours of those precious ZZZ’s will be lost.

The first few weeks are the toughest, but by around three months, your baby will begin to nap at times that are more predictable and at six months, your baby may begin to sleep through the night, giving you the opportunity to recharge your batteries!

An Overwhelming Love

For the majority of parents this is an instantaneous feeling, whereas for others it may take a little time, but the incredible bond and unconditional love a parent feels for their child is often both surprising and overwhelming. Parents often describe feeling a depth of emotion that they had never previously known prior to the birth of their child.

The author Elizabeth Stone really summed up the depth of a parents love concisely when she said, “Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart walking around outside your body”

Copious Amounts Of Conflicting Advice

Everyone from your friends, parents and in- laws to complete strangers will bestow their best advice and tips to you as a new parent with the best of intentions. The trouble is, the majority of it will be conflicting, leaving many first time parents feeling confused and unsure.

The thing to remember is that your baby is not like any other, she is unique and through trial and error, you will get to know your baby, learning precisely what works for you and your baby and gradually establishing what doesn’t. Take what works and discard the rest; it is a learning process and one size does not fit all.

Life Can Get A Little Messy

Any new parent will expect to be changing a large quantity of wet and soiled nappies when entering the world of parenthood and new parents soon master the art of changing a nappy after experiencing the odd, inevitable disaster. Excellent preparation and speed can help you to succeed and a carrying a spare change of clothes can save you in an embarrassing situation when it has all gone terribly wrong.

Babies will frequently bring small amounts of milk back up following a feed; this is called possetting and is quite normal for the first six months, or sometimes longer until the lower oesophagus valve matures and tightens. Along with possetting, babies will also vomit occasionally, which can be incredibly inconvenient at the best of times. Providing your baby is content, comfortable and growing well, there is no need to worry; it is simply a case of riding the storm with an armful of fresh muslin cloths and bibs at the ready.

An Altered Sense Of Time

Tasks like popping out for milk that would once have taken a mere five minutes can turn into mission impossible when baby becomes hungry or needs a nappy change the moment you are ready to leave. Longer trips can be even more complicated due to the fact that you need to pack and prepare for every eventuality, before walking out of the door.

New parents often find that they must temporarily forfeit their previously stellar punctuality record and adopt a slightly more flexible approach to time in the short term.

Your Relationships Change

The arrival of your newborn immediately changes the dynamics in your household, there is an additional person to care for and interact with which leaves less time for you and your partner to focus on one another and your relationship. It is important to set time aside for the two of you, even if it is just a ten-minute catch up over coffee.

Outside of your home, you are likely to experience many other relationship changes, some friendships may drift apart slightly due to your lifestyle changes whereas others will develop a stronger connection. You are likely to meet new people and many new parents find that becoming new parents themselves adds a completely new depth and dimension to their relationship with their own parents.

New Parents Often Worry About Their Baby

Common anxieties for new parents will be associated with bowel movements, or concerns over whether or not baby is getting enough to eat. New parents may also worry that their baby is crying too much or feel anxious about how much or how little their baby is sleeping.

First time tasks like bathing your baby alone or cutting their microscopic fingernails can be incredibly daunting, new parents will worry about making all kinds of mistakes, but mistakes are inevitable so it is important to be gentle with yourself!

There is a large variability from one baby to the next in terms of everything from feeding and bowel movements to developmental milestones, so comparing your child with others can make you worry unnecessarily. Discuss any persistent concerns with your child’s paediatrician for reassurance.

Leaving Your baby In The Care Of Someone Else For The First Time

It is important to take advantage of the care and support that is available to you as it is crucial to have a break and rest when you need to. Nonetheless, leaving your baby in the care of someone else for the first time can be something of an emotional rollercoaster for any new parent.

Building up to any longer periods of separation by leaving your baby for short periods at first can help to alleviate much of your anxiety. This process allows baby to get used to being away from you and helps to reassure you that your baby is content in your absence when left with an attentive and gentle carer.

A Complete Change Of Lifestyle

In the first twelve months of your baby’s life, many aspects of your lifestyle will change. Alone time becomes precious, free time is suddenly a scarce commodity, your alarm clock becomes redundant and all of a sudden, going to bed at 9pm on a Friday night feels like a luxury!

Your priorities change when you become a new parent and you develop a brand new perspective on life. The sleepless nights, the occasional worry and the mucky bits may take a bit of time to adjust to, but the abundance of joy and pure love that you experience as you watch your precious baby grow, will more than compensate for any of the trickier challenges you face in the first year as a new parent.