Riding the public rail system home this afternoon, daydreaming myself a hero facing off against train-robbers, two parallels suddenly emerged in my mind between governments and armed thieves. I at once wrote them down, and produced for these twin thoughts four more companions. The list, undoubtedly not extensive, I hope will amuse.

Both:

Want your money and will take it by force Prefer you unarmed (see number 1) Should be the lowest of society but are treated as noble by the media Sometimes get freaked and kill you Love democracy (see the history of piracy) but only when voting from whom to steal Are often crewed by individuals who couldn’t make an honest living

But, I hear someone complain, you’re riding the public rail-system. How can one so easily criticize the government while reaping its benefits? Well my fortuitous critique, the same way one might complain against a monopoly one by necessity is forced to patronize while yet finding the institution deplorable. But more to the point, I wish not to disparage the whole of governments, only to remember that they are an evil, a necessary evil, but still an evil.

Government exists because of robbers, because the violent will take what they want by force, but when those institutions exhibit the very villainy for which they were engendered to dispel, my jovial little list becomes a far more cutting statement. I think I’ve discovered a seventh similarity. Until the clouds be rolled back for judgment day, there will be no end of either thieves and robbers, or tyrants and their abuses.