IN thousands of Crows-mad families like mine, the Patrick Dangerfield conversation has been repeated constantly throughout the year.

Now that what so many of us expected has been confirmed, fans like my nine-year-old son will have to work out what to do with their number 32 guernseys.

For many children, he is a role model, both for on-field ability and off-field character.

Now he is walking out on their club to ply his competition-leading talents elsewhere.

Child psychologist Michael Carr-Gregg says Dangerfield’s defection is a valuable lesson for children in dealing with loss.

“The number one lesson any parent should teach their kids is if in life you can’t change something, you can always change the way you think about it,” said Dr Carr-Gregg.

“This isn’t going to be the first disappointment they’re going to have and it’s a relatively minor one.

“This is a really good example of how to deal with loss.”

Crows-supporting parents should talk about any feelings of sadness, because this helps validate and legitimise children’s similar feelings.

Dangerfield’s departure also helps teach children that even if they had wanted the star to stay, you can’t always get what you want.

Dr Carr-Gregg suggested parents say something like: “This is the best thing for Patrick. We can sit back and think about all the great memories and wonderful contribution he made to the club.

“We wish him the best as a person. He needs to do this for his own mental health and there’s no point in him staying if he’s unhappy.”

Dr Carr-Gregg, a Hawthorn supporter, is managing director of The Young and Well Co-operative Research Centre, established by the Federal Government.

Asked about the possibility of Crows fans booing Dangerfield upon his return to Adelaide Oval — likely when playing for Geelong — Dr Carr-Gregg said that would be “a sign of acute immaturity”.