CHICAGO—Sources passing through Terminal 3 of O’Hare International Airport on Thursday confirmed that a family on a two-hour layover has used the crude materials at their disposal to erect a makeshift shantytown in the vicinity of gate K3. Reports from the scene indicate the family of five has spread out over nearly a dozen seats, reinforcing the perimeter of their primitive settlement with a protective wall of piled-up winter coats, copies of celebrity-themed magazines, and numerous carry-on bags, many with their retractable handles fully extended to provide additional fortification. Within the encampment, a teenaged member of the group was seen sleeping on a rudimentary berth of sweatshirts and neck pillows that stretched across several adjoining seats, while a family elder was said to be keeping watch over the outpost’s borders in between games of Jewel Mania on her cell phone. As of press time, a single scout from the family had reportedly been dispatched from the colony to a nearby Auntie Anne’s to secure enough cinnamon-and-sugar-covered provisions to sustain the inhabitants for the long, harsh 40-minute flight delay that lay ahead.

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