What exactly are American Values? With a presidential election seemingly only decades away, this term is being thrown around a lot. Voters want their politicians to have American Values, as opposed to having American Liabilities or Australian Values (they spin the other direction when you flush them down the toilet). Of course, defining something as intangible as American Values can be difficult. So, here’s a simple reference guide of things that are and are not American Values. When you know the difference, you can make the right decision in the voting booth.



Voting? Blockbusters? Debt? Proofreading? Bacon? Genital Mutilation? White Supremacy? Defeating Nazis? Individuality? Pootie Tang? Velcro? Chinese Products Football? Philandering? Phallic Symbols? Southern Cooking? High-Fructose Corn Syrup? Obesity? Swimsuit Competitions? Physics? Creationism? Going to Church?



Sources: Blockbusters