“We are gathered to say that we can't forget, back and forth through our mind, behind a cigarette and the message coming from our eyes says… this time…. Do NOT leave it alone,” stated Generalissimo Thigpen of the ISC Seven Nation Army. ”And I told my brothers and sisters that I don't want to hear about it. Every single one's got a story to tell, everyone knows about it, from the Queen of England to the hounds of Hell Is Real.”

Insiders with the ISC indicate that the debate on the creation of the Seven Nation Army was contentious due to the innate pacifism, lack of vitamin D and inability to agree about anything of many of the attendees, as well as the fact that the ISC really only covers two nations.

“How the hell can we call our armed service the Seven Nation Army when we only have two nations,” stated one anonymous member. "

However, according to redacted reports that were forwarded to our dropbox account, this individual was verbally abused until they shamefully reported to the Malort corner where they consumed three shots of Malort for their penance and proceeded to projectile vomit into a wastebasket.

“The formation of the Seven Nation Army will allow us to combat the rising tide of European imports,” stated Generalissimo Thigpen. “We must stop the spread of digital warfare such as the Will Grigs song, the Allez Allez song or even the further appropriation of the Poznan. In this league, we all walk alone until we die, unless you join the Seven Nation Army at which point you will walk alone, but feel moderately adequate with that decision due to the 5% you will get off at Red Robin on one appetizer, only on Fridays, in the Highland Park area of Dallas.”

Sources indicate that the ISC will begin the process of arming the Seven Nation Army in the coming weeks as members will receive a stockpile of passive-aggressive Twitter comments, half-researched opinions on T.I.F.O and song choices based upon Ultras-tifo.net and a sense of righteous superiority that will lend to a massive amount of overreach.

“We are hoping to avoid confrontation, but we will not hesitate to hit back with a 16 tweet thread,” stated Generalissimo Thigpen. “Our members are devoted to peace, but will be ready for WAR AND BLOODSHED……… at least once they finish their day job and pick the children up from daycare and do the laundry.”

The Nutmeg News will have more on this when the ISC forms Seaman’s Navy, in honor of legendary Arsenal goalkeeper David Seaman.



