"There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible.""Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.""I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty.""Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as meaningless experiences go, it's pretty damned good.""As the French say, there are three sexes--men, women and clergymen.""Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope.""Sex is like air. It only becomes really important when you aren't getting any.""If it weren't for pickpockets, I'd have no sex life at all.""Sex is one of the nine reasons for reincarnation. The other eight are unimportant.""I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy.""The Bible contains six admonishments to homosexuals and 362 admonishments to heterosexuals. That doesn't mean that God doesn't love heterosexuals. It's just that they need more supervision.""Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night.""My cousin is an agoraphobic homosexual, which makes it kind of hard for him to come out of the closet.""It isn't premarital sex if you have no intention of getting married.""You know that look women get when they want sex? Me neither.""Life is a sexually transmitted disease.""Remember, if you smoke after sex you're doing it too fast.""What do I know about sex? I'm a married man."