Photo : George Pimentel ( Getty Images ) , Evan Agostini ( Getty Images )

Inspired, presumably, by the looming existence of Space Jam 2—or possibly just professional envy at the idea that Axl Rose got to rock out with Porky Pig—skating superstar/video game frontman Tony Hawk opened up today about a long-shelved project that would have seen him t eam up with the Looney Tunes for his own sports-themed cartoon action movie. Tentatively titled Skate Jam, the project was a hot-ticket item at Warner Bros. for a whole entire week back in 2003, before Brendan Fraser swooped in and ruined everything ( yet again) .


This isn’t actually the first time Hawk has talked about the long-dead Skate Jam project; he initially wrote about it back in 2010, in his memoir How Did I Get Here? The Ascent Of An Unlikely CEO. There, as now, he noted that everyone involved in the project was incredibly enthused about seeing Yosemite Sam pop a nollie—at least until Fraser, director Joe Dante, and Looney Tunes: Back In Action set off a ginormous, Acme-branded bomb at the box office in November 2003, single-filmedly demolishing chances for any future Tunes-branded film projects for a decade-plus to come.


Ah, but to imagine the world in which this movie actually happened! T he kickflips Daffy Duck would have unleashed! The bizarre Bill Murray bit parts! The soaring theme song we’d all eventually have to quietly distance ourselves from, now that ever- more allegations about its author have come out! What a glorious world. Damn you, Fraser. Damn you, Jenna Elfman. Damn you, Looney Tunes: Back In Action, you Roger Rabbit wanna- be poisoned pill of a film. When will you stop taking away the things we would have begrudgingly convinced ourselves we loved?