Note: This story has been updated on Feb. 3 with a response from the principal of West Orange High School.

Comedian Chris Gethard is taking his New Jersey alma mater to task after school administrators allegedly suggested that his act, which prominently features talk of suicide, would have to be toned down for high school students.

Gethard is the former host of “The Chris Gethard Show” on truTV, which began as a monthly show at the Upright Citizens Brigade Theatre in New York. He also has an HBO special, “Chris Gethard: Career Suicide,” in which he talks about his mental health history and times when he felt suicidal.

Gethard, 38, is an alumnus of West Orange High School like other famous figures including former governor Brendan Byrne, astronauts Mark and Scott Kelly (who will be featured in a Super Bowl commercial for Amazon) Ian Ziering (“90210,” “Sharknado”) and Okieriete Onaodowan, a cast member of the original “Hamilton.”

“My high school won’t have me back to speak to students because they’re scared I’d talk about suicide,” Gethard said in an Instagram post on Friday. “So my only option was to write said speech and post it publicly and also maybe expose some of the not cool stuff about their school system in the process.”

Gethard shared the speech he would have given at West Orange High School in a post on Medium. But before that, he recounted the story of how he came to find out that the school would require him to change his act, along with a few other issues he’s had with the school, starting from the time he was a student.

The comedian, author of the 2018 book “Lose Well” and the 2012 book “A Bad Idea I’m About to Do: True Tales of Seriously Poor Judgment and Stunningly Awkward Adventure,” said he never asked to give a speech at the school. A fellow alumnus had asked him why the school hadn’t invited Gethard to come back to speak to students.

“I told him honestly that I don’t know and that I wasn’t really interested anyway,” Gethard said. But his old schoolmate emailed, asking administrators to host Gethard.

From there, the comedian shared the response his fellow alum said he received from the school district:

“The Superintendent is glad to pass this opportunity over to the principal but would require an outline of the presentation or a direct contact with a publicist for Chris Gethard," the reply said. "The presentation would need to be tailored to be appropriate for students as compared to the program that airs on HBO. As always, we very much appreciate your consideration of the West Orange Public Schools. Thank you.”

“This is 85% a reasonable answer,” Gethard wrote. “But I won’t lie, it pissed me off.”

It was that one line — the line about the program needing to be tailored to be appropriate — that stuck in his craw. Gethard said while some parts of his comedy would be inappropriate, the topic of suicide in his HBO special should be considered anything but inappropriate.

“I think it’s the most appropriate thing for high school students I have ever made,” he wrote, saying he thinks it could help a student who might see themselves in Gethard, someone from their hometown. “I think it’s more appropriate for high school students than a lot of things you probably already show them.”

Gethard said that if he had heard the content of his HBO special when he was a teen, maybe he would have sought help at that time.

“That might have saved me a subsequent seven more years of hell before finally taking the plunge and seeing a doctor,” he said.

Gethard pointed to the suicide of Jonah Eskin, who attended West Orange High School just a few months before he did, though his photo wasn’t in the yearbook. Eskin hanged himself in 1994, at summer camp after his freshman year.

The comedian, a West Orange native, shared a New York Times story about the efforts of Eskin’s mother, Marcia, who was banned from establishing a scholarship in her son’s name. Four years later, there was a change in district policy, which at the time prohibited memorials for student or staff members who commit suicide, out of fear that they would glorify those deaths or lead to copycat incidents.

Eskin’s suicide came seven years after Bergen and Passaic counties were rocked by the 1987 suicides of four teens in Bergenfield, who had made a death pact and died of carbon monoxide poisoning. They were found inside a garage, in a car with its engine running. The teen suicides were followed by a suicide of another teen in Clifton, who asphyxiated himself in his car just a week later, and an attempted suicide of two more teens in the same Bergenfield garage.

Because of the policy at the time, Gethard recalled that West Orange High School would not allow the music department to dedicate a concert to Eskin’s memory.

Chris Gethard said he was bullied in high school and teachers told him that if they couldn't see it, they couldn't do anything about it. He later slit his wrists in a school bathroom.

“I don’t remember anyone saying a thing about it to us,” he wrote in the Medium post. “I remember kids whispering about it. I remember hearing his name. I remember people pointing out who his friends were. But I don’t remember a single teacher, administrator, counselor, or anyone taking any time to explain to us students what had happened.”

Gethard qualified that statement by saying that he may not have remembered that time 20 years ago enough to make that claim without reservation.

“But among friends I’ve talked to — not one person remembers the adults taking the time or effort to help us understand what happened,” he said, accusing the school of sweeping Eskin’s story under the rug.

“That’s — simply put — not kind,” Gethard wrote. “Not kind to Jonah. Not kind to his family. Not kind to the students, whose maturity and intelligence and capacity to understand you so severely underestimated then. And it seems, unfortunately, that you continue to now.”

Gethard recalled receiving no help from teachers after being bullied by students during his freshman year, then slashing his wrists with a razor in a school bathroom.

“The way you handled Jonah’s death only made me feel ashamed that I had those feelings too,” he said.

“You know what I think is far more inappropriate than anything I said on HBO?” Gethard wrote. “Judging a child for how he died.”

NJ Advance Media has reached out to West Orange High School for comment.

On Sunday, after the publication of this article, West Orange High School Principal Hayden Moore tweeted a reply to Gethard.

“I can’t speak for previous administration, but can tell you your request never hit my desk. Fact,“ Moore said. “Mental health is one of my key platforms & I would love to speak w/ u about coming to speak to our students. DM me."

Hi Chris. I'm the current Principal at West Orange High School. I can't speak for previous administration, but can tell you your request never hit my desk. Fact. Mental health is one of my key platforms & I would love to speak w/ u about coming to speak to our students. DM me. — Mr. Moore (@MrMooreWO) February 3, 2019

Here is what Gethard would have said if he were invited to speak at West Orange High School. His full post, titled “A Speech for My High School,” can be read on Medium.

Hello!

My name is Chris Gethard. I grew up down the hill. Shout out to all the down the hill kids, that’s what’s up. You up the hill kids are fine too. I’m not a hater. I took a bus and went to Redwood as a kid so I walked between those worlds. We’re all good.

That being said, I did go to Edison when it was still EDISON. It was pretty messed up.

I tell ya something, when I graduated WOHS I went to Rutgers. And when me and all the kids I was meeting from other towns would sit around the dorm telling stories about our high school days, invariably I’d share something that I thought was funny. You know, hilarious stories about fights and bullying and rumors about teachers we’d hear. And the other kids would look at me like I said something truly disturbing.

This town is a weird place. Nobody in a position of authority likes to tell you that straight up, so I will; if you get the sneaking sense in your gut that this town is weird, you’re not wrong.

It’s a beautiful place. I’m so glad I grew up here. I wouldn’t trade it for the world. But it’s weird.

It’s tougher than it needs to be. There’s a strange pride in toughness. I think a lot of North Jersey is like that. But I get the sense we amp it up to eleven. I don’t know why. It makes me wonder, though — why is there so much anger and so much pain under the surface of this town?

Here’s my theory, but I might be wrong: I think it would probably help if anyone in this town ever talked to us about why some neighborhoods are so much better off than others. I think you all see that. And honestly, I think you’re all cool with that. We grow up young and we get along. But at a certain point we hit an age where we’re prone to emotions and anger and all that stuff anyway, and someone validly says, “How come there’s a secret hidden private town for rich people in the middle of our town that we’re not allowed to enter or drive through? That’s kinda odd. How come some of the elementary schools in this town are visibly nicer even from the outside than ones in other neighborhoods? How come some kids in this school show up on their seventeenth birthday in new BMWs while other kids are on food assistance programs? AND MOST OF ALL, HOW COME WE NEVER TALK ABOUT ANY OF THIS?” It’s that last part that makes things so tense around here sometimes, if you ask me.

All that being said, this town is amazing.

West Orange is the most wonderfully diverse town I’ve ever seen. I’m one of the only people I know who things got LESS diverse around me when I went to college. And honestly? LESS diverse when I moved to New York City. That’s not how it’s supposed to go! West Orange has everybody. And we all learn about each other and from each other. It’s beautiful.

But I think there are hard conversations to be had about this town. And they get dodged because of how difficult they might be.

I think that’s a real and true shame. It’s such a disservice to all of us. Because the dividends those conversations would pay highlight everything amazing about this place. But fear means the powers that be look the other way in this town, way too often, and the lack of those conversations makes things real rough around here at times. It sucks.

It’s not on you guys. It’s on the adults.

(At this point the entire student body would leap from their seats cheering and I’d motion for them to please quiet down.)

A lot of the things that make this place feel slightly off, slightly dangerous, and often strange are actually things that have served me so well. Here’s some things I know about West Orange people:

We know how to talk to anybody.

We put our heads down and do hard work.

We never make excuses.

When things get nuts, we don’t freeze up.

Any employer you meet down the line will value all those things.

I wish this school was less scared of having hard conversations.

I believe in you guys. You’re West Orange kids.

Stay tough, although I think it’s unfair that you so often have to.

And maybe more importantly, when you don’t have to be tough, choose not to. You will be shocked at how much further empathy and compassion can take you in life than toughness can; we should be told that much sooner than we are around here.

And please, if things get dark, if you feel hopeless, if you ever start to think you want out, look at me and know I’m from where you’re from. I’ve felt what you felt. And I am SO SO SO happy that I never checked out. This isn’t a health class presentation. This isn’t by any book. It’s me telling you face to face that I grew up here. I’m one of you. I know you have it in you to make it. Seek help. Don’t be ashamed. Let your guard down. Keep asking people you trust to help you until someone steps up and does. Someone will. Their warmth and goodwill will surprise you. Find it.

Stay alive.

And obviously, more important than anything else –

F*** Livingston.

Thank you and have a great day!

Have a tip? Amy Kuperinsky may be reached at akuperinsky@njadvancemedia.com. Follow her on Twitter @AmyKup or on Facebook.

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