Manchester, New Hampshire—Three quarters of 2008 New Hampshire voters in the Republican primary said, according to the exit polls, that the debates were “important” in making up their minds. But that does not mean that all debates are equally important—and the only safe prediction in the impossible-to-handicap GOP race is that few New Hampshire voters will remember last night’s surprisingly subdued and sound bite-free seven-candidate snore-a-thon.

The best justification for the debate—which CNN tried to enliven with high-tech razzmatazz—was that it was the kickoff of a TV series that will run non-stop until next spring. The purpose of the opening episode was to introduce the characters (six men and a woman marooned behind identical lecterns) rather than to advance the plot. At times it was enough of a meandering discussion that it might have been entitled, “Seven Right-Wing Characters in Search of Real Differences.”

Mitt Romney, who has been seldom sighted by anyone other than his top fund-raisers in recent months, is the only major holdover from the 2007-2008 campaign season. In his opening remarks, Romney alluded to his been-there-failed-at-that record as he said ruefully, “Hopefully, I’ll get it right this year.”

As originally scripted, Monday night’s plot was supposed to revolve around Tim Pawlenty’s challenge to Romney as the top-dog Republican on the CNN stage. Pawlenty offered a hint of what all political reporters crave—a conflict—when he cracked on Fox News on Sunday that the president’s health-care plan should be called “Obamneycare.” But, instead, Pawlenty and Romney took the high road—befitting their elevated status as serious contenders—and never threw a punch. The narrative that Pawlenty would attack Romney was always exaggerated since it is never prudent for a candidate to introduce himself to national voters as the Minnesota Mauler. All the pre-game hype ignored the pesky detail that Pawlenty had been backing off the “Obamneycare” line at every sidewalk press conference since he uttered the fateful words on Sunday morning.

The other candidates were supposed to be competing with 2008 holdover Ron Paul in the crazy-relative-in-the-attic sweepstakes. But Michele Bachmann never got the memo. Instead of playing her familiar role as a Tea Party troubadour, she came across as a right-winger who offered quiet competence and legislative experience. There were moments when she seemed to be channeling Bob Dole as a congressional insider: “I introduced the repeal bill to repeal Dodd-Frank because it’s an over-the-top bill that will actually lead to more job loss.” In fact, when the Tea Party came up in a question, Bachmann immediately announced that she was the chairman of the Tea Party caucus on Capitol Hill. Still, Bachmann knew from her years as a cable TV green room regular how to command the headlines—she became the first White House dreamer in memory to declare their presidential candidacy in the middle of a debate.