Came home to a package on the front porch. "Contain yourself, Zoomer" I thought, (Yes, I call myself Zoomer) "this is the climax. Just pick up the box, nice and easy. There! Woops, dropped my keys. Forget the keys! No, wait, I need those to get in." I ran to the table and clawed the box open. A note! "Enjoy the monkeys - Your Reddit Rematch" What's this? Bubble wrap! Looks like I'm booked solid this weekend after all! And this! A Flingshot Flying Monkey! Uh-Oh! !Warning: CHOKING HAZARD - Small parts Not for Children under 3 years. Wait, (...take away the 1...) Whew! I'm over 3! I can play with it!!! Monkey Bandages! I can't wait to cut myself now! Soon enough, Zoomer, soon enough. Oh cool! A colorful ba- Dang, I broke it. Oh, it's a puzzle ball, it's meant to come apart. A movie! Monkey Shines. I'll watch this tonight! And finally, MORE MONKEYS!!! THERE'S LIKE, A THOUSAND OF THEM! Thank you Secret Reddit Santa Rematch! This is the best day ever!