“They all look alike now. I wish things could be the way they were.”

“What do you mean?”

“The clouds, Paul. They all look the same. I used to see things in them: horses, birds. But now, nothing.”

“So what is the problem? Jeez, let a cloud be a cloud, Sara. Just consider yourself lucky I let you have the window seat.”

“I remember more. So much more. I remember seeing the ocean far below us, blue with white swirls. I never see anything like that anymore. No ocean. No land. Just an endless floor of clouds.”

“You sound cranky. Maybe you should have some peanuts and some juice.”

“No Paul, no more airplane food. I stopped eating yesterday morning. And since then, I have been thinking, asking questions, and remembering. For the first time in a long while, I feel clear. Just…let me talk, let me say what is on my mind.”

“Okay, then shoot.”

“I keep remembering this one day, with the rainbow rising high over the ocean. The arch looked so solid that day, and bright, like the frozen rings of Saturn. It looked more like a marble bridge than a mist, like we could just jump down and walk across it, holding hands. And the ocean, too, it looked so still, like solid ground from way up here.

“You and I, we both looked at it together out of this little window. You smiled and I smiled. You kissed me, you loved me then.”

“Love,” Paul chuckled, “Sara, love is for teenagers. It messes up everything, makes you crazy, disrupts stability. Who needs it? Just settling in for the ride, Sara, that makes me happier than love ever did. These seats are padded. Comfy. Who needs anything more?”

“Nonsense, Paul. Here we are in an airplane, but who knows what all is down there, what all is going on? But here we are detached, flying high above it all. I want to see new things. Come to think of it, how long have we been here, on this plane? Seems like forever. Seems like we ought to land every once in a while, for fuel, if nothing else.”

“Huh. Interesting question. A very, very a long time, I think. Does seem a little strange, I suppose.”

“Strange? More than strange, if you think about it. You know, my life before this plane ride, I can hardly remember it. Even with us. I have trouble remembering how we met or where we used to live, before this. This plane trip seems like my whole life. I try to remember and this fog rolls into my mind.”

“Again, it is a little strange. But all that matters is the present. Why dwell on the past? Maybe some things are meant to be forgotten.”

“What are you talking about? Look around. Doesn’t it bother you? Here we are. Why are we the only passengers? Why no stewardesses? Who the hell is even flying this plane? Can you even remember where we are supposed to be going? Maybe you should stop drinking the juice, so you can see what I see.”

“Lower your voice Sara.”

“Lower my voice?”

“I admit, it is funny not to remember where our plane is supposed to land. But I have a bad feeling that when we do land, everything will be over. For both of us. For everything. Maybe it’s just a case of nerves on my part. But I feel like if this plane never lands, it might be a good thing.”

“We have to land someday, Paul. Otherwise, what is the point of this? Of anything? How can you not be tired of drinking nothing but fruit juice and living on peanuts, cheese dip, and crackers from the first class pantry? I think I used to eat better food, a long, long time ago. What was it?”

“Sure, maybe the food here is a little bland, but here we are, still alive. Besides, I have trouble remembering anything else. And you know what, Sara? I feel tired. Too tired to care.”

“The more you talk, Paul, the more you say things like ‘too tired to care,’ the more I know: we have to get off this plane. Something is wrong, very wrong. Something is wrong with our memories. I have trouble remembering anything outside this plane trip. I remember scary storms that shook the plane, and I remember the rainbow, and the ocean with the swirls, but the rest is a haze. Who was my mom? How did you and I even meet? What was the name of my home town? What if somebody drugged us, brought us here? I have to go the cockpit, Paul, I have to know, I have to know right now who is piloting this plane and where they are taking us.”

“Sara, sit back down. How are you not afraid?”

“Why would I be afraid of a pilot?”

“I just…”

“Never mind, I am going. Should have done this a long time ago.”

“Do it then, do it if you have to, I guess. Pull the curtain. Find out.”

“I will. Okay, here goes.” Sara headed toward the cockpit and a long moment of silence followed.

“Well? Sara? Tell me. What do you see?”

The silence continued.

“Sara? Say something.”

“Nothing.”

“What do you mean, nothing?”

“I mean nothing, no one. Oh my God, no one is flying this plane. Paul,” Sara reappeared, “this, this was all I found in the cockpit, a dummy, a mannequin.”

“Hey, easy, careful where you throw that, you almost hit me.”

“Ugh. All this time, I thought someone was in control, someone who knew what they were doing. But Paul, there is no one here, no one alive, just us. Oh God, did we die and go to hell? Or is this a nightmare? If so, please, someone, please let me wake up.”

“Wait, calm down, Sara, no good losing our heads. It is upsetting, I admit. But what can we do? We are high above the earth. We could jump out, but we would die.”

“I wonder if there are any parachutes.”

“My God, are you seriously thinking about jumping? Thousands of feet above the earth? Who knows what is beneath the clouds right now? It could be an active volcano for all we know.”

“Wake up, Paul. Wake the hell up. Something has been stolen from us, something important. We barely have any memories of anything before this, our plane is being piloted by a dummy, and who knows if it is even going to land?”

“Okay, I get it, I do, but calm down.”

“I will not calm down. I am going to search every inch of this plane until I find parachutes or a flying manual, something. I am going to either escape or land this thing, or die trying.”

“Sara, please. Stop scaring me. Sara.”

Sara stomped through the aisles, yanking open the luggage compartments, throwing magazines into the aisle, and moments later the sound of rattling dishes came from another part of the plane.

“Sara?”

After a long moment of silence, Sara spoke. “I looked. I looked everywhere. No parachutes. There is no way off this plane unless I can figure out how to land the damn thing. Right now, though, we would crash if I tried. But if we run out of fuel, we will anyway.”

“Please, Sara, stop this. We are okay before you started asking questions. Look around. Is it really so bad, the life we have now? Well-fed, no immediate danger? We have a nice window view of pretty clouds, a pilot…”

“A pilot? There is no pilot, Paul. Did you forget?”

“No, but maybe…maybe we could pretend. Put the pilot back where he was. He looks real enough to me, eyes, nose, a mouth. Maybe we would be happier if we just pretended.”

“If I ever do that, I might as well die right now.”

“Just, try, just try for a moment to accept things the way they are. Take a deep breath, okay?”

Sara let out a long sigh. “Maybe at one time, I could have. Accepted things the way they were. I keep remembering that day over the ocean with the rainbow, and how I imagined that you and I went walking over it, hand in hand, it was like it was a bridge to a mythical land. We were so much younger then, and I remember how you kissed me. I never wanted to leave that moment, that place. I wanted to land right there on that rainbow. But it was not just the rainbow I loved. It was us, the way we were. It was spring, I think, we were in love, and you wanted so much from life, and so did I. Everything, it was all so beautiful then.”

“Everything changes, Sara, has to change.”

“I would forget about landing if I could just go back to that time. I want to go back, Paul, I want to go back, even for a moment, even more than I want to live. I want to go back to when everything was new…before this. Before the peanuts and the apple juice and the cheese got old. Before we became content just to sit here and watch the clouds.”

“Clouds are nice. Fluffy and harmless. And life, time, they only move one way. Somehow I think this plane does too.”

Sara returned to him and sat next to him, and took his hand. “Kiss me, Paul. Pretend. Pretend we just met. Pretend you love me the way you did that day, with the rainbow and the ocean swirls.”

Paul shrugged. “What is the point?”

“Does there have to be a point?”

“If I kiss you, will you settle down? Stop trying to get off this plane? Will you drink some juice and have some cheese?”

“Maybe. Maybe I will. For now.”

“Okay, then, come here.”

Sara leaned forward and gazed earnestly into his eyes. He lightly cupped his palm around her head, drew it toward him, and kissed her. She leaned in and for a long moment kissed him back. Then, blinking, Sara drew away. With a slight frown, she stared dully out the window.

“Well?” Paul says.

“Not the same.”

“Told you.”

“Oh Paul, I wish I could have stayed in that moment. I wish time had stopped right there. I wish we could have stayed the way were. That the rainbow could have frozen where it was. But it was the time after that seemed to last forever. The sameness. The apple juice. The peanuts. The clouds.”

“No, Sara, not sameness, it just seems that way. Look out the window. Do you see?”

“Oh my God. The clouds. Where did they go? For the first time since I can remember I can see solid ground.”

“Do you see the mountains capped with snow? How the sunlight paints their tips red and gold?”

“I see them, Paul. So many, and all the blue shadows, and how the whiteness glimmers in the sunlight. So beautiful.”

“Maybe the rainbow is gone. Maybe it will never come back. But this, Sara, this is why we keep flying. The surprises. What else is there we have never seen? What else will appear between here and our destination, whatever it is?”

“It is a nice view. But is that enough? Is a nice view enough?”

“Maybe. Maybe it is for now.” Paul took her hand. Looking earnestly at Paul, Sara returned his grasp and smiled sadly at him.

Paul returned the smile. “I bet you would feel better if you drank some juice. Would you like a sip of mine?”

“I am hungry. Oh, look Paul, I think I just saw a cormorant flying over the mountain. Beautiful. Maybe one sip. Just one sip. For now.”

Paul smiled mildly at her as she took a long sip from the straw. “Not many cormorants at this height. Hey,” he touched her wrist. “Are you gonna to be okay?”

She set the carton down and stared intensely at him. He looked back at her with mild concern, and her gaze softened. She turned her head to face forward and rested her head lightly on his shoulder. “Yes. Paul. I think I will be. I think I will be. For now.”