Man I hate Superman. Well, not hate exactly, but just give no fucks about. He’s just such a lame character. From origin, to motives, to the general premise of nearly every conflict he faces- it’s all so generic. Even his name is like the most no-effort matter-of-fact superhero name you can possibly have. And I get that he’s basically the original prototype for all of superherodom, but you know what? Times change. The auto industry as we know it basically began with the Model T, but when’s the last time you saw one of those things driving around? Superman needs an update. Hell, not just an update, a full on redo if I’m ever to give a fuck about him.

And please no more of Zack Snyder’s, ahh, let’s say vision, where he’s some sort of apathetic Jesus welding the power to replace color with high contrast.