PROTIP: Adjust according based on the number of over-eaters in your family.

This is a handy poultry cooking chart created by the folks at Personal Creations detailing how much bird to buy for how many people, and how long to cook it. It's for people who might be new to hosting Thanksgiving. Or for people who are used to hosting Thanksgiving, but suck at getting the right amount of food. It is not for vegetarians. What are your Thanksgiving traditions? My family gets drunk as shit the night before, everyone wakes up hungover, then goes to the one restaurant in town that's open on Thanksgiving. Afterwards we all get drunk again and watch my aunts scream at each other and duke it out on the porch.

Thanks to Julissa, who agrees it sucks there's only one day of giving thanks, and 364 days of ingratitude.