Organising and packing for a summer holiday with young children is unquestionably stressful: the lists, the equipment, the umpteen changes of clothes to pack. But spare a thought for those of us with a child on the autism spectrum. For us, the preparation required to go away is on a different level entirely, requiring the foresight of Nostradamus and the military planning of Norman Schwarzkopf.

A growing number of families are having to attempt these organisational feats, with current research suggesting that one in 100 people is on the autism spectrum. For them, the new is to be avoided at all costs; much more pleasurable is the predictable and known. This makes holidays – the celebration and exploration of the unfamaliar - deeply tricky.

So are holidays and autism incompatible? For some families dealing with complex needs it may be, but for many a little bit of tweaking can make a big difference.

This includes visiting the airport a week or two before you fly to prepare your child and contacting the airline to see whether it’s possible to fast-track your family on the day you fly out. Getting photographs of all the bedrooms, living spaces and facilities in the place where you’ll be staying is a good idea; often self-catering works better than a hotel holiday as there are only the family rules to conform to.

These photos can be made into a scrapbook for your child to look at before you go. Also include pictures of all the activities you are planning. What your holiday may lack in spontaneity it will gain in peace of mind, as you avoid the meltdown of an unprepared child.

If your child is pre-school then try to book a holiday out of season - you’re more likely to avoid queues and there will be fewer people around during those inevitable restaurant meltdowns. And if by some miracle you find a holiday that half meets everyone’s needs, it’s well worth booking it again and again.



Make sure your destination is somewhere outdoors, like a beach

Eating out is likely to be the point at which you wonder why you’re putting yourself through this - and paying for the privilege. The distractions and sensory bombardment of a restaurant makes it difficult for some children to cope, let alone eat their veg - and the tut-tutting of fellow restaurant-goers may reduce you to hissing swearwords in the wrong language to other diners as you leave.

For some children with more severe behavioural problems, the National Autistic Society’s website has downloadable cards in 16 languages, explaining that your child is on the autism spectrum and is not just being naughty. One tip is to order the bill as soon as the food has arrived, so you can munch and run.

And if you are hoping to have a - gasp! - conversation with your other half while on holiday, then consider bringing a nanny along. It’s an expensive option, but Holiday Nanny can provide short-term nannies with a minimum of two years’ experience of working with children on the autistic spectrum. They recommend that the nanny visit your family, possibly to babysit, on a number of occasions before you go on holiday, to make sure the child is comfortable with their new carer.

Rupert Isaacson, author of Horse Boy, a book and film about his half-crazy, half-brilliant adventure with his wife and autistic son, travelling around Mongolia on horseback and visiting shamans, recommends making sure your destination is somewhere outdoors, like a wood or beach.

“If you do, it will go well because there will be no bad sensory triggers - such as loud industrial noise, fluorescent lights, smell of cleaning products - and it will be a kind of therapy for the kid to be free from all that. Choose places where the kid can run at will and make as much noise as they need — and where all the attention and focus can be on them. Don’t take family members who will get annoyed if it’s all about the kid. You will need it to be all about the kid, because autism and new places don’t always go so smoothly.”

And for anyone embarking on their summer holiday this year... good luck! It’s certainly a challenge, but then, when is anything easy with autism? Ideally you’ll be teaching your child that they can find some sliver of enjoyment from something or somewhere new, and you won’t be allowing the condition to rob you of your basic human right to eat and drink too much, and to take time off from the dishes and housework.

Autism-friendly holidays

Holiday Nanny prices start at £469 for a week, which includes 45 hours of childcare per week and 14 hours of evening babysitting spread over four nights (no finding fee). Families will be expected to cover the nanny’s flight, accommodation and food (01494 772400; holidaynanny.org.uk).

Happy Kids Holidays (happykidsholidays.com) rents ASD-friendly cottages and gites in France with additional photos of the property to be sent to renters, personalised social stories and online chats with their team and families about the holiday.

Equine Learning will be running Horse Boy camps for autism families at Ottery St Mary in Devon during Autumn half-term this year and Spring half-term 2014, as well as summer camps in 2014. These run over four days and offer horsemanship activities for the whole family in addition to therapeutic work with children with autism. Families enjoy the activities together in a supportive environment. Prices from about £550 per family, camping. More details (07456 773947 or email info@stratfordefl.org or see www.centaurustrust.org). Horse Boy also runs its own camps in the US near Austin, which usually last three days and offer horse-based therapy for the child and time off for the family. (horseboyworld.com).

Coworth Park hotel in Berkshire offers autism-friendly horse lessons and a kids club that incorporates sensory play (coworthpark.com).

The charity Ambitious about Autism has some more useful tips on its website (ambitiousaboutautism.org.uk).

The Horse Boy by Rupert Isaacson is published by Penguin at £9.99.