@DrOxtongue

So every year a bunch of rich, powerful and possibly insane posse of important people meet in a specified hotel to discuss a host of topics that we the public, or the press, are not privy to…this meeting is known as Bilderberg.

I packed a Leatherman to protect myself from the rabble…

I went to last year’s Bilderberg meeting which was held at The Grove, Watford, to sink my teeth into the hysteria. Also because I knew this could be the last time the group decided to meet in the UK for years to come.

A brief history - The Bilderberg group first assembled in the Netherlands - 1954, for years the shadowy group attempted to meet in secret. This fuelled the fire burning within most conspiracy fans, who believe the group are responsible for fixing the price of oil, covering up the existence of aliens, human cloning, starting wars, and sacrificing young children…to name but a few.

Long story short Alex Jones, David Icke, Jim Tucker and many more Bilderberg hunters (since its formation) have tried their damnedest to make the world pay attention to what the Bilderbergers are doing behind closed doors…each adding their own brand of spin along the way. Now you can do YouTube searches and numerous internet searches to take your own research into the group further – but be warned - what you may find could change your life or spur on neurosis, it’s up to you. Below is an Alex Jones rage compilation that is sure to get your knickers in a twist.

Sweaty palmed I clambered into a stranger’s Citroen Picasso, with another stranger I had met on a forum and we set off for The Grove. Not knowing if I was to be gang raped, murdered or even sold, however the journalist within me over-rode normal human concern, and thrust me head first into the viper pit.

The “free speech” fringe festival zone

Evangelical Christians booming about hell, bearded-men discussing home grown cannabis, dreadlocked jungle dudes and chicks conspiring about lizards, amateur photographers swapping stats with other hobbyists, Charlie Skelton running around the place like a journo on PCP, Alex Jones ranting about 1984, David Icke telling us all to get off our knees, a quivering Luke Rudkowski changing batteries for his DSLR, Ben Fellows smearing Ken Clarke, middle-aged men sporting anonymous masks smelling of fermented pig shit, a whole host of freaks, dead-beats, activists, drug addicts, average citizens and journalists all combine in the melting pot of Bilderberg 2013. Watch a video of Alex Jones and Paul Joseph Watson mingling with fans down below.

I scuttled around the place like a stunned beetle, thrusting my camcorder about like a lancer’s spear, I realised I was alone out here braving the dust bowl of the Bilderberg fringe festival. About a mile in the distance I could see the Grove hotel, within it were some of the most influential people in the world (see list of attendees here, possibly not in its entirety).

Protected by an illiterate rabble of G4S foot soldiers the Grove seemed impenetrable. It was a fortress, a bastion of sanctuary, a splinter in the mighty haunches of the alternative media.

As you can see we were penned in like mad hens

Before I could gather my thoughts a man named Baba Danji announced he was going to cross the line and walk towards the Grove hotel to confront (in his words) the free-Masonic cult inside. I looked to my left and spotted Alex Jones bounding over to the Baba, so without hesitation I ran by his side and followed him into the heat of battle, like a suckerfish I became dependent on AJ’s Texan cologne…together we captured the master’s speech before he dipped under a make-shift fence and headed towards The Grove hotel. See the video below for his mad speech and to discover the fate of Mr Danji…not to be missed.

The campsite was teaming with spooks, self-proclaimed cyber activists, hippies, police and normal men and women, loaded on weed and booze, who had caught wind that some mad shit was about to kick off down Watford and it was not to be missed.

Helicopters circled above us like mechanical birds lost in the clouds. The real debauchery began when the sun went down and the campsite transformed into an uncontrollable congregation of conspiracy fiends and wasters. People burned wooden pallets, men in vans put on laser shows and blasted out shit techno through thousand pound PA systems, anonymous members formed elite smoking circles, no-hopers spoke endlessly about how love will conquer all and people like me, who were there for the glitz and glamour, buzzed around like flies at a bake sale sampling the sugary weirdness before moving on to the next rabble of unpredictability – pie-eyed not from drugs but from the weirdness attacking our senses from all angles.

A rare spectacle - Alex Jones & The Big Icke side by side

There was a strange scent in the air throughout the entire weekend, an intoxicating scent which drove most people insane and others back home to their beds. We believed that we were part of history. We believed that this protest/piss up/celebration of the oddball was going to be remembered as the year the Bilderberg group finally disbanded due to bad press attracted by devoted activists and protestors. Some of us knew that no matter how loud our eldritch squawks grew we would never be able to defeat the PR monster.

Thousands of people were turned away from the ‘free speech protest zone’ and the campsite was teaming with subnormal types from all walks of life. Being here was about as close to the machine as one could ever get, but no matter how far you stretched your arm (even to the point of dislocation) you never came close to brushing a single metal cog, engine or even a production belt.

We were a collective scum floating on the cesspool of delusion, attempting to change history by assembling in a field and listening to mad men howl of madness. As a collective we stood for the refusal of the system, we stood for free speech and all that was right…but when the dust settled and the mad men went home to their mad mansions or lonesome shacks we were left right back at the beginning, pondering over which microwave meal to ingest and still getting pissed at the man for overcharging us on gas and electric.

We were watching them, they were watching us…it was all rather casual

The might of the PR machine surrounding the Bilderberg attendees will never be scuffed through standing in a field half buzzed on resin you bought from a member of anonymous. We will never defeat propaganda by getting drunk on special brew and buying David Icke’s back-catalogue of literary insanity…or dare I say sober swaying in a rocking chair musing over academia.

The only hope we have was what we had before we entered the circlejerk of Bilderberg 2013, and sometimes, hope can be a tricky bastard to pin down.

BILDERBERG 2013 VIDEO PLAYLIST