[That fighting game you like] sucks.

[That fighting game you like] has too much option select vortexy bullshit,

[That fighting game you like] is just waifu bait,

[That fighting game you like] is just dumb 50/50s,

[That fighting game you like] has 3D graphics and 1D gameplay,

You don’t get to play [that fighting game you like] until you master a bunch of stupid glitches,

[That fighting game you like] is the best game that no one wants to play,

You should learn [that fighting game you like] so you too can lose to mixups that the attacker doesn’t even know how to block,

Fuck [that fighting game you like], it’s just poking,

Fuck [that fighting game you like], no neutral,

Fuck [that fighting game you like], it’s all fireball/DP zoning,

Fuck [that fighting game you like], it killed fireball/DP zoning,

[That fighting game you like] is 20 minutes of crouching Fierce,

[That fighting game you like] is like dunking on someone and then playing rock-paper-scissors to see if it counted,

[That fighting game you like] is a dumber version of [another fighting game],

[That fighting game you like] is mindless rushdown,

[That fighting game you like] is all turtling,

It’s really a shame about [that fighting game you like],

Have you thought about trying Guilty Gear?

— patrick miller