“I honestly have no idea why we ever let them join the Alliance in the first place,” muttered the frustrated high king of the Alliance, Anduin Wrynn. There seems to be a growing sense of unrest and distrust among Alliance leaders, namely centered around Genn Greymane, king of the Gilnean worgen.



The disagreements began when night elven high priestess Tyrande Whisperwind decided to go against the high king’s orders and fight back the Horde who had overtaken Darkshore. Greymane was about to take Anduin’s side as usual, but was distracted by what looked like a throwing motion from Tyrande, instead choosing to follow her on all fours, asking the confused priestess “what she threw.”



“You didn’t hear it from me, but the whole ‘druid of the pack’ thing was just a big fat lie,” Whisperwind told Nerfwire. “We just wanted to make them feel better about being nothing but big dumb dogs for the rest of their lives.”

When Nerfwire asked Greymane for comment, he repeatedly barked, then began to scoot across the floor on his butt. Our correspondent was going to ask him to shift out of worgen form, but was too weirded out by the slobbering dog-person.

“Honestly, I can ne’er understand wot they’re tryin’ tae say. It just sounds like a bunch o’ barks ‘n’ growls tae me,” stated former dwarven king Magni Bronzebeard before crushing up a blue and gold crystal, rolling a piece of parchment and asking us to leave. “Iss pure gibberish is wot it is.”



When Nerfwire approached the oldest and wisest leader of the Alliance for comment, the draenei Prophet Velen just laughed and took a sip of his Dalaran Noir. “If you want my honest opinion, I think they’re fools. I mean, what kind of people get forced out of their own homeland?” We were instructed to leave immediately as a swath of female draenei entered the room.

All in all, Anduin and his fellow leaders seem to be working together to ensure that the cursed Gilneans feel welcome as true members of the Alliance, with the first step being getting Genn to stop humping the throne.

