Reflections on the “You and I” mother and daughter seminar, a process whereby girls and their mothers learn about the Jewish meaning of a Bat Mitzvah ceremony and prepare for their Aliyah l’Torah with their rabbi.

Reflections from the Rabbi:

“The “Mothers and Daughters” seminar is a very special program. Only two percent of girls in Israel celebrate becoming a Bat Mitzvah in a meaningful way, beyond just having a party. Many mothers, most who have never celebrated becoming a bat mitzvah themselves, hope that their daughters’ ceremonies will be meaningful but don’t know how to make that happen.

The “You and I” seminars provide the perfect answer for what they are looking for – quality time with their daughters, a strong women’s circle, a place where they can listen to their daughters’ hearts, hear what is on their minds and, give it all an egalitarian and empowering Jewish framework. The “Mothers and Daughters” learning session is a joint journey into the world of womanhood, Judaism and the individual. I am privileged to have the opportunity to lead such a journey. It is exciting to see the dynamics between every mother and her daughter, and the strengthening of the mothers’ circle as it strengthens the young women.”

-Rabbi Rinat Safania Shwartz is the Rabbi of Kehillat Shoham and the regional Rabbi of the Hevel Modi'in Regional Council

Reflections from the mother:

“A vacation overseas, a class “Bat Mitzvah”, a party [typical superficial way in which Israeli girls celebrate their Bat Mitzvah]…. In this important year of growing older, I was also hoping for another experience, something more meaningful and with values. I found it at the “Mothers and Daughters” workshop, which allowed me to talk to my daughter about all the things I wanted to, but hadn’t known where to begin.

In an intimate atmosphere, in an embracing circle of women, and confidently led by a Reform rabbi, I went out hand in hand with my daughter, a young woman with an older woman, on a special journey through Jewish tradition and renewal.

At this point in my daughter’s life she is forming her worldview on family, community, belonging and what’s important in her personal life. I was glad that a window of opportunity opened for her, and that investigative thoughts began - who is she, what is Judaism to her, and what is her place in the world of religion? Together, we discussed our female history - in our family, and in our country, and reexamined the incentives and desires of women who are part of a family and community.

We looked at what connect us to the Jewish people and to Jewish history, and fondly remembered some of the basic tenets of Judaism. These were sacred moments of closeness, of joy of self-reflection and, of reevaluation of our values and strengths.”

-Shani Rotem

Reflections from the Bat Mitzvah Girl:

“For me, the “Mothers and Daughters” workshop taught me a lesson I would never learn in school. The course was very interesting. We learned in an empowering and new way about women’s rights, mitzvot and their meaning, women who have left an historical mark, and about improved attitudes towards women. In addition, the name “Mothers and Daughters” is really appropriate for what we did. Besides learning about values and topics in Judaism, we received the opportunity to learn about one another, and had a place to work on the relationship between a mother and her daughter.

During the course, we spoke a lot about equality between women and men within the Reform stream of Judaism, and because of these discussions, I decided to be called up to the Torah on my 12th birthday. The atmosphere during the course was wonderful and we could speak openly during each session. I strongly recommend it for any mother-daughter pair.”

-Yael Rotem

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