Translation: "Sonu says he wakes up to noisy Azan. But what about the fact that I wake up to noisy bhajan?"

One may ask: when Whataboutery is an essential device used by all intelligent humans to out hypocrisy and selectivity, why be selective in listing examples of Whataboutery of a chosen few?

The answer is simple. While Whataboutery is indeed practised by all, the ones referenced in this article are some of the prominent keepers of the flame who regularly ridicule Whataboutery even as they use it themselves. This, believe psychologists, is to do with the fact that a hypocrite seldom admits to being a hypocrite; the self-deception is so entrenched that he or she is unaware that others have begun to view him or her as more immoral than even an outright liar. In other words, people gladly tolerate someone who ridicules Whataboutery while admitting to also indulging in it; what they detest is a hypocrite who ridicules Whataboutery but never accepts that he uses it himself.

Why, then, do those who rejoice in hypocrisy and selectivity ridicule Whataboutery? Perhaps because it shows a mirror to their judgment and logic, of measuring up men and women, and historical events, on their own scale. So a Churchill is still regarded as one of the greatest Britons because he “won” them the war. But “what about” the fact that he was a racist bigot, a proponent of Social Darwinism, a shameless imperialist, and had sanctioned the use of chemical weapons during the Great War, and was directly responsible for the murder of four million Indians during the Bengal Famine? Now, wait a minute. Don’t indulge in Whataboutery.

In the same vein, Chairman Mao is on currency notes, is worshipped by millions, including a substantial number of Indians, for taking China forward, standing tall against the West, and flying the flag of socialism and brotherhood. But “what about” the fact that he was a ruthless dictator and killed upwards of 45 million, of his own people, through his catastrophic Great Leap Forward? Quiet, you. Enough of your Whataboutery.

Castro, Rhodes, Tipu, Leopold, Indira Gandhi, Lee Quan Yew, Allama Iqbal, Guevara – the list is as endless as the excuses to consecrate these specimens as heroes and saviours of the world. The hypocrites adore the grey because it cushions their irrational reasoning and validation of crimes and misdemeanours. This is especially true of the left. How else can they justify to themselves their everlasting faith in an ideology that has led to the destruction of whole nations and the murder of more than 100 million people but by wiping away inconvenient truths and instead hawking notions of fraternity, equality and righteousness?

When accosted with such truths, their standard response inevitably is: But what about Hitler who also killed millions? Rather than reflect on the choices they have made, the very same people, when caught peddling hypocrisy and selectivity, and asked to justify their worship and appreciation of evil men and women, or of holy books that profess bigotry in addition to benevolence, cry Whataboutery. Grey is what you get when you mix good and evil and rouge.

Whataboutery was first made popular by the Soviets, who answered every accusation of human rights violations made against them by the Americans with "What about your own human rights violations, Yankee?" In essence, the Soviets were doing an Ambedkar – pointing out the hypocrisy and selectivity of the Americans. Or, as the English would have rather used the phrase: "Well, that's a bit rich coming from you, isn't it?

It needs to be stressed here that Whataboutery, even though it is necessary for outing hypocrisy and selectivity, cannot be used to justify or explain away the wrong act itself. Discrediting the hypocrite or a selectivist is one thing, not acting on the accusation is quite another.

Pointing out a previous wrong or an embarrassing precedence (that, it must be kept in mind, occurred contemporaneously and not centuries earlier) to out selectivity and hypocrisy does not and cannot cancel out the fact that two wrongs don't make a right. Why this has to be stressed is because those who accuse others of, first Whataboutery, next, use the above argument to rub it in, even though the only intention of the Whatabouterers may have been to out the hypocrisy and not cushion or explain away the wrong.

To return to Ambedkar's Whataboutery as an example, the next arrow let go at him would have been: "So now you are telling us not to write about Hindu evils, is that it? Listen, you Sanghi. Muslim evils don’t cancel out Hindu evils, got it? Gosh, did you really write the Constitution?"

Whataboutery is not only an essential means to out hypocrisy and selectivity, it also serves as a crucial cerebral exercise in a non-political, non-sociological context. As any scientist knows, Whataboutery is critical to providing solutions to any given scientific challenge. Indeed, attend a drug-discovery conference and you would understand. Most questions that follow a talk are Whataboutery questions. "Professor. Impressed with your data on the drug that inhibits the RNA polymerase of Mycobacterium tuberculosis. But "what about" the fact that it might also bind to the human RNA polymerase and interfere in its functioning?" At which point the anxious scientist would answer: "Yes, quite right. We are presently working on trying to minimise the drug's effect on the human polymerase. Hopefully, I'll be able to present that data in the next conference. If you invite me again."

Now the scientist, if he was a Communist – a long shot as rational, logical minds don't usually fall for cults and canards – would have retorted: "Here we go. You and your Whataboutery, again. Which mofussil university did you say you are from? Ignoring your abysmal command over English, why can’t you just look at the drug's effects on the pathogen's polymerase, for heaven's sake? Do you really have to bring in the drug's side effects?"

With the exception of the few who made the mistake of rushing in where angels fear to tread, scientists generally like to keep to themselves and their community, unperturbed by Whataboutery questions, respecting them even, as illustrated by the exchange that took place following a lecture delivered by a scientist at a gathering of non-scientists. When asked if he supported animal rights and was a signatory to a campaign against cruelty to animals, the scientist answered in the affirmative. It turned out to be a well-laid trap. “Oh, yeah? Then ‘what about’ the fact that you routinely test your molecules and your drugs on harmless, innocent animals? You inject them with unknown substances. You kill them. Do you take their prior permission to do so?”

The scientist was humbled. He learnt the hard way that he also was a hypocrite. He tried to explain that if one didn’t test drugs on animals, those drugs wouldn’t be available to cure millions of humans, and animals, of horrible diseases. But he knew better inside. No explanation could censure the guilt. The scientist had been outed.

That scientist was none other than this writer.

Away from the lab, things are not that genial. Hypocrisy and selectivity are as intrinsic a human nature as lying, and when political agenda enters the equation, the results are immediate. Followers of all ideologies partake in it, but only some of them take the moral high ground and accuse others of Whataboutery. These are typically those who want to win an argument at any cost, dismissing the possibility that their logic and reasoning are nothing but a tired Torvill and a drowsy Dean skating on thin ice. Sooner or later, the grey vanishes and the sun appears and the ice melts and the choreography goes for a toss and the music is out of key and you are left waltzing to a song that only you like, with steps that only you know, and a performance that only you applaud.