Yeah, yeah, I'm late. This is not new. And I could go all apologetic, but... meh.

"The Girlfriend" has always been a bit of an odd episode for me. The one word I'd use to describe it is competent: it's not a great episode, but it's also not bad by any means, so I've always been a bit confused about how to interpret all of the hate the episode seems to get. It's pretty much just the prototypical Season 4 episode: competent, reliably funny, but not leaving much of an impression. (Looking forward to the Season 4 angst, Guy.)

Certainly not helping that is the complete lack of any efforts by people who despise the episode to articulate upon that, and however much of a common pattern it's become at this point for "bad" episodes, I still like pointing it out and making myself look like the patron saint of commentary in comparison. I mean, I don't have to call an episode "gay" in some lazy attempt to make a point. So take that.

The Actual Start of the Article

The episode starts with Jamie doing expectedly Jamie things and terrorizing her classmates in the cafeteria, but shockingly, upon confronting Alan and Carmen, she finds herself at an impasse; perhaps the emptiness of her life that drives her to aggression is out of the emptiness of her heart. With that revelation (and a solid, what, three hours to think about it?), she decides to make Darwin her boyfriend, a resolution about as natural as you'd think. Darwin, however, decides to do nothing about it, assuming the situation will simply work itself out.

It does not, and he quickly finds himself trapped in Jamie's accidental mind games without the courage to terminate their "romance." Gumball tries to help Darwin throughout, but when all else fails, he's forced to confront Jamie about the relationship himself, somehow cornering himself into the position of "Jamie's second boyfriend," yet another reminder that Jamie can't grasp basic people skills. What ensues is some legitimate horror as Gumball flees through the hallways from Jamie, who takes increasingly horrific measures to captivate Gumball's heart/just generally be creepy.

Eventually, Gumball stumbles upon a dead-end, and in a last resort, asks Jamie what she wants, causing Jamie to freeze up on the spot. She finally gets her moment of clarity and takes a step back to reassess the situation while making some musings on love in general. All is well until Darwin finally stands up for himself and tells Jamie of her wrongs... after she figured them out herself... and he swiftly gets a punch to the face and a visit to the hospital. Perhaps Darwin was right after all...

Oh, status quo. That pesky status quo.

Analysis

First of all, let's. Talk. About. Structure. This is a very thoroughly well-done episode. Typically, TAWOG likes to organize its adventures in a format of "beginning, bloated middle section, and end," but "The Girlfriend" is more focused on constantly raising tension than repeating the same joke over and over again. There's a sense that it's building to something, and sure enough, we end up with a thriller that pretty much exemplifies the show's sheer genre-swapping prowess.

There's always untapped potential in playing something so painfully straight that it loops back around into becoming hilarious; "The Joy" is the show's best example of that fact, but "The Girlfriend" manages a more psychologically-inclined angle, and it's a treat to watch, let alone that it perfectly demonstrates Jamie at full force.

That being said, the scene also showcases one of the largest perceivable issues with the episode: Jamie's character seemingly embraces to that tired "crazy b-tch" archetype. I mean, she's acting out as manipulatively and sadistically as possible for the sake of maintaining Darwin and keeping Gumball on his heels for his interference, but at the same time, though, that's just what Jamie's character is. The line is a bit blurry, but there's enough distinctive about Jamie that keeps her from becoming a tired cliche because she becomes a legitimate threat who acts out in the most comically insane ways possible, all of which is out of the conflict with the person that she actually is.

The show is putting Jamie in the position of Darwin's romantic partner, but the fact of the matter is that she isn't cut out for that mold, so all of her lashing out is an extension of her botched efforts to conform to a softer side that doesn't exist. She sees romantic gestures - giving a gift - and somehow manages to convolute and bastardize them as much as possible out of her sheer inability to empathize or grasp what love actually is. The artifice she puts up ends up, subsequently, is about as believable as a shoddy Potemkin village, so horrifically debased that her facade isn't fooling anybody, let alone herself.

I think where the divide between Jamie and cliche lay is in the degree of Jamie's misguidance, in spite of her best efforts. She's not insane for the sake of being insane; she's insane because that's the only mode her character has, and the confines of her personality don't allow her to be anything but - thus, an inner conflict is initiated.

Ironically, there's also an inner conflict mirrored in the object of her affection, too. In accordance with Darwin's always-questionable drive for altruism, or at least being completely inoffensive, he decides to endure it in the hopes that everything will settle organically.

As such, with both Jamie stuck in her unsuccessful attempts at being girlfriend material and Darwin refusing to take initiative, the characters get trapped by virtue of one another's own downsides - they're equally responsible for one another's suffering, and a vicious cycle ensues. With no escape for either party, Gumball is forced to interfere like the unfortunate victim of a mutually-destructive interactive theater experience, and blessedly, the results are infinitely more enjoyable.

(The only complaint I can support is the insistence on using Gumball to expedite the process instead of letting Darwin and Jamie take anything away from it on their own terms, but since that's an integral part of his design as a character, it at least makes sense.)

Obviously, I'm probably missing a few issues in terms of why people don't like "The Girlfriend" because I'm just a single person, and one who operates on a higher plane of understanding, so do tell me in the comments how terribly wrong I am with everything I'm saying.

The next article will be covering one of my favorite episodes of all time, and one of the most controversial: "The Finale." I can't say when it's coming out because this got pushed over so long that I need a brief cooldown, but let's just say next Thursday. Au revoir. That's French.