CONTENT WARNING: Animal Cruelty

Customer: “I plugged a mouse into my computer, and it died. Now I can’t get it out.”

(We review for a few minutes and I deduce that he has plugged a mouse into his USB port, but it’s stuck inside and won’t work.)

Me: “Okay, so grab the cord and try to pull on that.”

Customer: “You mean the tail? That’s already in the port.”

Me: “Well, the cord shouldn’t be. You’re supposed to plug in the other end.”

Customer: “You mean the head? I don’t think it would fit.”

(Suddenly realizing what the customer has done.)

Me: “Did you plug in a live mouse to your computer?”

Customer: “Yes, I believe I said that.”

(I put the customer on hold for several minutes. When I recover I realize I don’t know what to tell the customer I call my supervisor who instructs the customer to bring the laptop into a repair shop. I get the customer back on and tell him this information.)

Customer: “But Mickey’s gone for good now, right?”