San Francisco 49ers head coach Jim Tomsula, who runs his team with all the leadership stylings of a substitute teacher, has some thoughts on social media. You will absolutely guess what he thinks of it.


Per Matt Barrows of the Sacramento Bee, Tomsula appears to have been prompted by Colin Kaepernick’s Houston flood gaffe a few weeks ago:

“I don’t like it at all. I don’t know anything about it. I don’t do it, I don’t use it, I really don’t want anybody to know where I’m at all the time or what I’m eating.”


That’s a predictable answer, but pretend Jim Tomsula was forced to use Twitter and Facebook in his contract. What would he post? Some possibilities:

Just choked on a cashew for about a minute. No one else was in the house. Really close call. If you need a quick workout, just go up and down the stairs as much as I do every day. I’m sweating so much, I had to change shirts. Took the hot rod out for a scenic drive, and it started to smell after a few miles. Checked under the hood and there was a dead squirrel. I’m a little heated right now. Asked for no pickles on my burger at Wendy’s, but I got them anyway. Thought about going back but I was already in the car. Does anyone have any recommendations for a plumber? Got some good plywood sheets out behind the garage for anyone who wants to come pick them up.

It’s fun to dream.

[Sacramento Bee]

Photo: AP

Contact the author at samer@deadspin.com .