SECRET SANTA

AKA HOW SKY FAILED TO STEAL CHRISTMAS

AKA The Tale that Lacked Sufficient Yuri

A RWBY Fanfiction

By oddman5 and two collaborators

This fic was designed by me and two others, using characters and a setting that are the property of Monty Oum and RoosterTeeth. Several References and injokes are present which are also not my property.

Ah, Christmas. Snow tumbles from the sky, people feast in celebration. A time for cheer, goodwill, family, frie-

PRESENTS!

But will there be food?

Oh, you people are here…

Yes. Presents as well. Lets zoom in on that, shall we?

Ruby Rose skipped down the hall in her pajamas, her destination clear to any who saw her – the large communal Christmas tree that served their little section of the Beacon dorms.

"It's Christmas time, here at Beacon…"she sang, as she reached the student "Study Hall"/Rec Room that held the tree and all the presents. Or at least that's what she meant to say, the candy cane in her mouth muffled it a bit.

Rummaging in her stocking for a piece of chocolate, she opened the door to find- nobody.

"Hear them sing, ri- Huh? Where is everyone?"

The large grandfather clock that stood in the corner answered, chiming twice before falling silent once more, except for the sounds of the pendulum inside.

"Oh…" Dejected, Ruby returned to her room to go back to sleep, this time noticing the sleeping teammates that she had missed in her rush when she awoke the first time.

Well, that didn't go as planned, did it, dear reader?

Crazy girl, waking at 2am? I've had people shot for less.

Is that a rhetorical question?

Rhetoric can be somewhat repetitive, so I hope not.

Mewp!

Well, let's give it another shot, a few hours forward in time…

As Ruby awoke for the second time, she glanced at the clock by her bedside. 5 AM. Good enough.

"MERRY CHRISTMAS!" She yelled as she jumped down next to Weiss. As she did so, the white haired girl was startled and shot up from her bed, hitting her head on Ruby's bunk. "Oops…!"

"You dunderhead…!" Weiss groaned, "Why are you screaming so early in the morning?"

"It's Christmas, silly! Blake! Merry Christmas!"

The cat faunus simply rolled over and grumbled, going back to the land of sleep.

"Yang! Merry Christ- Yang?" It would appear the blonde brawler was not in her bed. But if not in bed, then where could sh-

"BOO!"

"AUGH! Yaaaaang! Why are you still doing that?"

"Because seeing you hiding under a bed is still just too adorable, baby sister!" Ruby extricated herself from under Weiss' bed. Weiss on the other hand had also gone back to sleep. Or was trying, at least.

"Weiss!" Ruby whined.

"Ruby," Weiss said from under her covers, "If you want me to get up at this ungodly hour, you're going to have to explain to me exactly why I should, and it had better not start with 'Christmas'"

"Aw come on Weiss, don't be a Grinch. Here, have a candy cane!"

"Ruby Rose, you better not have just compared me to a fictional, green skinned troll!"

"Uhm, I mean, not a Grinch, but, uh, uh, a grouch?" Ruby stammered, trying to save her already shaky friendship with the ivory-haired heiress

"Oh c'mon Weiss! Get in the spirit of things!" Yang said as she tried to pry the covers off of her own partner, while grumbling lightly. "Blake wake up!"

"I dunno, Yang, she looks like she's in one of her moods again." Ruby said cautiously.

"Nah, you just need to know how to deal with her," claimed Yang, "Watch and learn."

Yang reached under the covers, rummaged around for a moment, and gave a soft "aha!" as she found what she was looking for. She took hold of- whatever it was, and PULLED-

-And the back of Blake Belladonna's neck (along with the rest of her) came up with the hand , the girl impotently waving her hands at the air in front of her.

"Yang. Put me down."

"No can do kitty cat." Yang grinned, "We have Christmas to celebrate!"

"It's too early."

"Early bird catches the presents first!"

"I don't want any."

"Oh yes you do!"

"No I don't."

"When you find out what I got you, you will." Yang leaned in close to Blake's ear, whispering something that Ruby and Weiss couldn't exactly hear, but Ruby was sure she caught "Daimyo-sama" in there.

Blake's eyes went wide and she instantly freed herself from Yang's grip and made a beeline for the door, before she could open the door, she was grabbed once again.

"Ah ah ah! We need to get Weiss first and go there as a team."

"But- but- alright" Blake groaned, going slack in Yang's grip, "Weiss. Get up."

"Why should I?"

"So I can - never mind." Blake cut herself off before she said anything.

"Weiss!" Ruby whined once more, this time bouncing her knees on the heiress's bed. "C'mon already! Everyone else is up~"

"I bet Ren's not up." Blake stated monotonously.

"Nora." Came Weiss's deadpan response.

"Oh my… I withdraw my bet"

Ignoring the peanut gallery behind her, Ruby continued trying to get the heiress in front of her into the spirit.

"Aw c'mon Weiss, why don't you like Christmas?"

"Why do you think?" came the reply.

"And that made for a rather difficult childhood"

"...Oh, yeah." The mood sufficiently dropped, even Ruby seeming to lose a little of the Christmas cheer she was displaying moments ago. Still, being Ruby, she quickly rebounded.

"Well thats no reason you can't enjoy this one!"

Weiss sighed, not quite up for Ruby's seemingly eternal optimism this early in the morning.

"Fine." And with that, Ruby dragged her partner out of bed with a single tug of her arm, the slim heiress not being much of a challenge for her strength born of a 5 hour building sugar rush and the Christmas Spirit.

"Come on, let's get our stockings!"

"Ruby you already got yours, I can smell the chocolate on your breath"

"But you haven't!" Ruby qrowed , smiling at Weiss in what would have been an endearing fashion… if she hadn't just dragged the pale girl from her bed at 5 in the morning.

"Now come on, we need to get some nourishment, (also known as 'Christmas candy' to others) into you."

Ah, Team RWBY. An excellent chemistry they have, is it not? Still, I am here to tell a story, and although seeing the young Misses Long and Rose (I swear, Yang is more of an enabler than a good influence) gorge themselves on candy would most likely be amusing, it would be rather dull to tell- As it would not give much screen time to the more… monochrome two of the little group.

Monokrom, just saying.

So let us skip- Hey, hey who's telling the story here?

All of us I thought?

So, as I was saying, let us skip ahead once more, dear reader, to one of the most beloved (In developed nations) traditions of Christmas - the opening of presents.

PRESENTS!

I am more partial to the food myself.

Moving on!

What do you have against the food?!

Pair of philistines…

On with the story!

"Hey Rubes, have you found any of your presents yet?" Yang asked as she stood straight and scratched the back of her head.

"Nope!" Ruby called back, "Have you?"

"I haven't found any either" said Blake from under the tree, "Though I have found several that had the labels torn off"

"HAW HAW"

"What was that?" said Ruby

"It came from that hallway" Blake muttered, twitching a bow-clad ear.

Wait, wait, what?

Twitch, twitch

You and those ears, I swear

CAT EARS ARE UGUU-KAWAII.

What our illustrative colleague said.

Oh my god, you guys, I'm trying to tell the story.

Illustrative wha?

He means illustrious.

You failed to describe the epicness of the ears,

And I meant illustrative, he is an Artist after all, and those words were image provoking.

I prefer the term lewd!

I prefer that we have a little class.

They bear little relevance to the story! And don't make this a sex thing, dammit! That's not what happened!

No one said anything about sex. CAN WE GET BACK TO THE STORY? ...monokrom

Lewd means sex! And YES THAT IS WHAT I'M TRYING TO DO!

Well try and do the ears justice then.

OKAY THEN, LET'S GO BACK TO THE STORY.

Alright, where were we… seriously where were we, you guys distracted me.

We were following the apex hunter...ess, on her chase.

Um, ok… ah! Found it!

Team RWBY walked towards the hall the laugh had emitted from, listening in.

"And then, I stole all the tags off their gifts! Now they won't know whos is whose!" Sky Lark was proclaiming, obviously very proud of himself.

"Wait, just team RWBY's? No one else's?" Dove asked, tone of a person talking to an enthusiastic 5 year old who just covered themselves in paint.

"Why would I take anyone else's tags?" Sky Lark seemed honestly confused why his team had collectively facepalmed.

"Seriously dude, you suck at this bullying thing" Cardin said.

"Shut up, Cardin, you got your ass kicked by that Arc kid!"

"I TOLD YOU NOT TO BRING THAT UP!" Then there was the sound of a lamp breaking, and punches, and all-around chaos as CRDL descended into one of the brawls they were famous for.

"Well that solves the case of the missing presents." Blake said dryly, Team RWBY collectively sweat dropping at CRDL's brawl, before they returned to the Rec room.

"Yeah, now we just need to find the ones with torn labels"

"Yeah! It'll be like a treasure hunt!" Ruby exclaimed.

"I regret agreeing to use the same wrapping paper," Yang muttered as they stared at the pile of presents, each looking incredibly similar.

"Okay, a hard treasure hunt then," Ruby continued. Her optimism is just incredible.

"I already found a few while I was looking earlier." said Blake, pointing to three similarly shaped, lumpy packages, "They're right over there"

"Oh! I know what those are! They're for you three, from me! Open them, open them!" Ruby chattered.

"The Super-Secret Surprise Gifts that you've been trying to hide for the last month?" Weiss deadpanned.

"Um, maybe?"

Weiss sighed, and biting back a small smile at Ruby's eagerness, said "Alright, bring them here."

As each one is passed to a member of WBY, they begin unwrapping. each one uncovers a large piece of cloth, each of a different color. The color-coding plain to see. Yang traded Blake the black gift she had received for the Yellow one Blake had unwrapped, and continued unwrapping.

"Ruby, are these… cloaks?"

"Mhm! I made them myself! I saw you guys didn't really have anything warm to wear over your combat gear, so I thought, how can I fix this? And then it came to me: Ruby, You have to make them something warm to wear yourself! But then I didn't know what to make you so I thought to myself, "Ruby, make what you already know how to make." So I did!" Ruby finally took a breath, having not breathed during her short rant.

"Thank you, Ruby" Said Blake. A buffer for the wind while she was utilising the grapple function of Gambol Shroud, was something she greatly appreciated.

"Aw, lil sis, you shouldn't have!" Yang said as she tried it on. "And it fits perfectly, too!"

Weiss was already wearing hers. Everyone gave her a strange look

"Its cold in here. ...you dragged me out here in my night clothes..." Was Weiss's rather frigid retort.

"AUGH! Oh my god Weiss I am so sorry" Ruby exclaimed, making wild hand movements

"I'm fine now. Thank you Ruby."

Yang said nothing during this exchange, just smirking at the pair, which had Blake raising an amused eyebrow at her, before looking to see what presents were next.

Ok, What was that all about?

What was what all about?

BUMBLEBY!

Damn it, you are useless at hiding anything.

Why are we getting into the couples? And I thought you two were big into monochrome

Murgle

And I will ship nearly anything… so long as it is yuri...

*Sigh* you guys...this is a family story.

How can you not love the adorable Tsundere Weiss?

TSUN!

I'm not saying I don't! I'm saying that they aren't anywhere near that stage in their relationship yet!

She wasn't that Dere. ….you editing little….

Me?

It was hardly going to be him.

WhiteRose~!

Fair enough. But I'm just trying to tell the story as it happened.

That version lacks sufficient yuri.

The sufficiency of the yuri is not yours to decide!

This is where i would threaten you with the fact that there are 2 of us, and 1 of you, unfortunately…

LEWD YURI!

He's in no position to aid you. It seems we find ourselves at an impasse.

...I'm still gonna tease the remaining 2 ships, YOU CAN'T STOP ME!

Fine. Whatever, just don't try and make them bang on Christmas.

You got a problem with a little "Festivities~" ?

I told you, this is a family story.

Yuri is good for the soul

Well that may be, but small children might read this, and small children don't have souls.

True, very true my fiend.

MY NAME IS MICHAEL CABOOSE AND I. HATE. BABIES

Anyway, back to our tale!

Which lacks sufficient Yuri.

Enough with the yuri!

Never enough Yuri.

"Alright, lets find more presents!" Ruby said to her team.

"I think mine were close to the tree somewhere" said Blake, crawling underneath said tree to find them.

"Alright, let's find those, then! Banzai!" Yelled Yang as she crouched and prepared to dive into the pile of presents.

"Ah! Yang, be careful, you don't want to mess up anyones gifts"

"There is no need." said Blake from directly behind Yang...

...Who promptly fell over in surprise, "HOLY CRAP! How did you- but you were- and then you- what?!"

"I found the presents and crawled out from the other side of the tree."

"Oh. Well that makes sense."

Blake was holding a small stack of 3 boxes, stacked in order of size. She began passing them out to their intended owners, Weiss receiving the largest parcel, Ruby the medium, and Yang the one that was just right.

Weiss took a moment to find the best place to start unwrapping hers, as opposed to Ruby and Yang,who tore away at the wrapping paper like it held food and they were starving. Their enthusiasm did not last past the revelation of the contents, however.

"Books?!"

Blake smirked a little, she had anticipated this response from her more… energetic teammates.

"Don't be so quick to glare at me, at least not until you see what they are, ok?"

Ruby looked back at her gift, reading the title along the spine aloud as she slid a finger down it, "Heroes and Heroines Through the Ages… Wow..." Ruby looked over at Blake, a smile on her face "You… remembered?" With that Ruby launched herself at Blake, grabbing her in a hug. "You're amazing!"

Blake took the praise with an uncertain smile, looking down at the girl who seemed to have attached herself to her waist.

"O-of course I remembered, I remember everything."

Weiss had finished unwrapping her present amidst the commotion, and was looking at it with a curious eye. "A History of the Faunus Wars and their Effect on Modern Society...Wasn't this book banned for political reasons?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about." said Blake with a nonchalant shrug.

"Well, thank you either way. I'm sure it will be a very interesting read"

Yang, meanwhile, had been furiously reading the small volume she had retrieved from its packaging, giggling sporadically.

Weiss eyed the title with dismay, "Barbara Dunkelman's Complete Pun Anthology? Why does this fill me with dread?"

Yang quickly replied, "Aw come on Weiss, I'm sure it will be very useful… in the present!"

Ruby snickered, Blake groaned, and Weiss' hand hit her face with the frustration of 10 College freshmen unsure of their majors.

"Belladonna, you've doomed us all..." was heard through gritted teeth, behind the hand covering her face, her left hand twitching for where Myrtenaster would normally be hanging on its belt.

Blake had slumped a little, acknowledging that she had unleashed something terrible. So tearable that she wanted to tear her hair out. "Augh, now I'm doing it too!'

Oh, come on. Punny Yang? Seriously?

Of course. Its tradition at this point, I don't like it anymore than you do.

I thought it was funny *chuckle*

And that is why I can't count on you to be a tie breaker, I would win the argument, but at what cost?

Your sanity. Anyway, is Yang being punny that important to the readers?

I was thinking my dignity, but because the readers are crazier than we are, and thats saying something, you want to try angering them?

They might use the pitchforks!

Eek, No! Yang is punny, check.

Now for the Yuri.

HEY! NO. BAD. Bad boy.

Yuri is good though!

Even so, there isn't any in this story. If we wind up being wrong, then what will we do? The readers will get mad at us for being wrong.

With enough Yuri, we can solve anything!

He speaks the truth.

Dammit. I can't win with you.

Nope.

Of course not.

Well the fact remains that there isn't yuri in this story, AT LEAST not yet.

...that you've spotted.

Hehehehe

Well a diehard shipper will see it in anything. You two ARE diehards, so you aren't exactly reliable.

Excuse me, I have a healthy appreciation of Yuri, not an obsession.

YURI!

He, however….

Right. Anyway, all in favor of continuing to sta- tell stories about team RWBY?

Do you have to ask?

Well, I thought it would be courteous.

Lets roll!

"So where did you put your gifts, Yang?" Ruby asked her sis, after they had convinced her to put the book down. Each of them plotting its eventual and lingering destruction for suffering it had already inflicted and threatened to continue to inflict.

Yang smirked at them, gesturing towards the direction of their dorm, "I left mine in the dorm, so they would be safe"

"So you mean that all this messing around was unnecessary for your gifts?" Weiss asked, eyebrow raised.

"Exactly!" was her enthusiastic response.

"And why didnt you mention this earlier?"

"Well, Ruby was having fun."

Weiss gave Yang a look.

"...and I kinda forgot…"

"That's what I thought."

"SO! Hows about I go get my presents, and you guys enjoy yours, and maybe find Weiss'?" Yang backpedaled, while stepping backwards out of the room, avoiding Jaune and his team as they walked into the Rec room to open their presents, greeting team RWBY along the way. Inter-team gifts had been forbidden by Command- er, I mean Headmaster Ozpin, so as to prevent conflict. Or something like that.

It isn't at all that we dont find the other teams as interesting and don't know how to tell their part of the story.

Oh hush, you.

Shush, fluff awaits!

As Weiss paged through her new copy of a book that would be hard to find in most legitimate establishments, Ruby and Blake began searching for Weiss' gifts to them (and Yang).

"Blake, have you found anything?"

"I found one," came the reply, from around the other side of the tree.

"Hey Weiss who's thi-"

"I'm not telling you, you can find out when they're all opened."

"Awwww..."

As Yang came back to the Rec Room with her presents, she saw Ruby sitting patiently , her sugar rush apparently having ran out, staring at a group of parcels, practically vibrating with anticipation, Weiss still reading her new book and Blake-

-Had fallen asleep. Did she really take that long?

"I'm back!" She called out, drawing her teammate's attention. "I see you guys found Weiss' presents."

"Yep! And now that you're back, we can open them!"

"Eh? You were waiting for me?"

"Of course!" Ruby replied, looking shocked that Yang would even suggest they go on without her. "You're one of us, we can't go on without you!"

"Aw, you're so sweet, Ruby..."

"Anyway, let's start opening!"

Ruby managed to get her tightly wrapped box first, ripping into it quickly, uncovering a yellow box that she knew very well.

"Weiss, is this what I think it is?"

"Well that depends. Do you think its a box of assorted chocolates imported from Mysteal?"

"M-m-m-m MYSTEAL? Weiss, how expensive was this?"

"I'm not going to tell, and it's rather rude to ask, you sugar-soaked dunce!"

"Ah! Sorry, Weiss." Ruby said as she gazed reverently at the open box of sweets

Yang had torn the paper off the top of her large box and was staring at it with an awe similar to her sister's, a wide grin slowly splitting her face.

"Weiss, is this…?" Yang asked, a gleeful tone filling the air.

"Legal? Maybe…. Oh, what is it? Well what does it look like to you?"

"It looks like a Red Rider, carbon fiber, 750cc model Tuning kit for motorcycles"

At this point Blake took a close look at the box, a disapproving look crossing her face, "Don't tell me you made her death-trap faster Weiss?"

"Blake, its hardly a death-trap. I know what I'm doing!" Replied Yang, with the tone of a discussion practiced many times before.

"And that doesn't comfort me whatsoever as to your safety."

"Well I like the bike!" Was Ruby's contribution to that argument, which was immediately disregarded, as she was a little biased, what with her semblance being Speed.

Seeing them continue without even glancing at her, Ruby stomped her foot,

"Anyway, you two can have this discussion later! AFTER we finish the presents!"

"...yes, mighty Leader" came the simultaneous response.

"So Blake, let's see what you got!"

Blake started unwrapping her gift and saw…

Wait, do you guys remember what she got?

That was meant to be your job! Mister We-Must-Tell-An-Accurate-Account.

Was it a book?

No, no, Yang got her a book. She- oh crap the readers are watching SPOILER ALERT!

Wait, wasn't it a really soft brush or something similar? I recall making a joke about Weiss wanting her hands on Blakes hair~

OH, That was it! A brush because the kitty ears were sensitive!

*Murgle* Kitty ears!

Yes, praise the most epic of ears.

Now that that crisis is resolved, ON WITH THE TALE!... And don't either of you dare bring up cat tails.

*Whistles innocently*

*Giggles*

And saw… A brush.

"A hairbrush, Weiss?" Blake said to the ivory heiress.

"Well, you have your… furry birthmarks…" replied Weiss, referring to the extra ears that sat atop her teammate's head, "And with the especially aristocratic cat breeds you have to be careful when brushing their heads, so as not to cause discomfort. So, I assumed you might be having similar problems. That brush is set with Sleipnir hair," referring to the 8-legged horses of Atlas, known for their incredibly soft coats.

"I thought Sleipnir were nearing extinction… aren't they ridiculously rare?" asked Blake, who had indeed been having top-of-the-headaches when brushing her hair in the morning

"I did say aristocratic, correct?" Came the response, delivered with a raised eyebrow.

"Weiss… I don't know what to say..."

"'Thank you' is a nice place to start. Anyway, you're very hard to shop for," at this Weiss let a small smirk cross her face, "It came down to either that or a ball of yarn, and I didn't think you would appreciate the ball of yarn."

Blake shot Weiss the type of quick glare she reserves for people who make cat jokes and call the White Fang a cult.

"How about we open Yang's gifts," suggested Ruby, trying to play peacekeeper once more.

"Yeah! You're all gonna love them, you can count on it!" Yang broke in, passing a different shaped package to each of the other girls.

Blake, having some idea of what her gift was already from the hint dropped earlier that morning, tore into hers like, like… well, like a cat tears into a catnip-scented mouse toy.

"Yang, if this is what I think it is, I'll… I'll… IT IS! THE SEQUEL!" Blake pulled away the last piece of heavily taped wrapping paper, revealing a slim novel titled: 'The Daimyo's Loyal Servants' and immediately opened it to the first page.

"Ah-ah-ah, kitten. Take a look inside the cover." Yang said with a wag of her finger.

With a curious look at Yang, Blake complied and promptly froze. "But… How… She's in her hermitage..." With that Yang was tackle hugged by a squealing blur of black, the book falling to the floor, where everyone's favorite heiress picked it up.

"The Gallant Tsunade . Wow. How did you get this, Yang?"

"Heh, simple. I sent it to her and asked nicely!" Yang replied, smirking at Blake, who was wrapped around her, pressing her face into Yang's neck, murmuring "IloveyouIloveyou" over and over.

"Easy there, Blake," said Ruby, trying to pry the girl off of her sister.

"Yeah, let's see what Yang got her little sister!" Weiss added, a taunting lilt to her voice, anticipating teasing and embarrassment of their young leader.

"H-hey! What's with that tone, Weiss?" Ruby said, pausing in her attempts to remove Blake from her sister, which now involved Crescent Rose being utilised as a crowbar.

"Nothing, I just know your sister, and I know that whatever she got is going to be hilarious." Weiss shot back, picking up one of the 2 remaining packages, a rather flat piece, with what seemed like another box on top of it. The package had a large white W on top, clearly meant to indicate its destined owner.

"Ah, Weiss, you know me too well!"

"Unfortunately, yes, I do. Ruby, open yours, so I can hurry up and laugh." Weiss gestured towards the remaining parcel, a small, lumpy package that felt like cloth.

"Ah! Ok." Ruby reached for the package and began pulling at the wrapping, making a hole large enough to put her hand in, which she promptly did…

...And blushed to the roots of her hair.

"YANG!"

And with that, Weiss, having seen Ruby's reaction walked over to the box that had been dropped by the now bright red Ruby, and immediately broke into giggles, covering her mouth.

"Well I suppose our Dear Leader is growing up~ " and with that, Weiss retrieved the contents of the box, holding up a pair of leopard-print brassieres.

"WEIIISSSS, DON'T HOLD THEM UP!" cried Ruby, snatching them, and stuffing them back into the box, still living up to her name.

"Aw c'mon, Ruby, you're a big girl now!" smirked Yang, having finally pried Blake off of herself.

"Just- you- I can't just- Just… open your gift, Weiss!"

Weiss managed to get over her giggles enough to pull the last package towards her, eyeing it warily, "I'm probably not going to like this, given what you got your sister."

"You wound me, Weiss! And here I actually put some deep thought into your gift!"

Weiss unwrapped the package carefully, taking her time removing the Scotch tape that Yang seemed to have used as her main wrapping material, slowly revealing a hinged wooden box with a chequered pattern on the outside.

"Go on, open the box!" Yang urged, still snickering at Ruby's red face.

"I'm getting there, you brute!"

She slowly opened the box, seeing….

"Chess pieces?"

"Yeah! I remembered hearing you chew Ruby out over not thinking ahead in battles, and not strategizing and all that stuff, so I decided to get you something that would help teach her!"

"... Shouldn't you have given this to her, then?"

"Well, yeah, but this isn't embarrassing! Plus, this way it will actually be used."

"Hey!"

"Well, thank you, Yang. I'm sure with this, I could probably beat some sense of tactics into that dunderhead, even if it might require just the board at times..."

"HEY!"

The grandfather clock in the corner began to chime again, striking seven times before again falling silent.

Yang started at that and said to no one in particular, "Only 7:00? Ugh, breakfast isn't for an hour still yet…"

"Well, at least we have a way to pass the time, I bet I can beat you in 20 moves," challenged Weiss.

"Oh, you are so ON, sister!"

As Weiss and Yang began setting up the marble chessboard, Ruby approached Blake, the book she had received held in her grip.

"Umm, Blake?"

Blake looked up from her new book, "Yes Ruby?"

"Well, um, will you, I mean err-"

Looking over, Yang smiled at the scene, "Shes trying to ask if you'll read her one of the tales Blakey, she loves having them read to her, I swear I spent more time reading to her than I did reading my own books when we were younger"

Blake smiled, "Of course, Ruby" She patted the couch next to her and took the book as it was offered to her.

Ruby curled up next to her, eyes locked on the pages between Blake's hands, head on her shoulder.

"Now let's see… The Tale of the Hero of Time, and the Song of Storms"

"Once upon a time…"

And that, dear readers, concludes our tale… at least, for now.

SUCH FLUFF

You start with the doge speak, and i'll take your internet privileges away.

EEP!

Damnit, I was trying to be cool and you two ruined it! Goddammit, you guys!

This is the price you pay for insufficient Yuri.

Yuri~

More like the price I pay for letting you two into my house….

I am almost insulted, one would think you were afraid of a little yuri.

Let's not have this discussion in front of the readers, eh?

You're only saying that cause they agree with us!

I neither confirm nor deny these allegations.

...damn it, we didn't have any White Gold in there!

We'll include it in the Valentine's day story, how's that sound?

Acceptable I suppose.

Valentines?!

Eventually, yes. Anyway, that's our show, folks! Have a lovely Holiday, and a happy New Year!

BUON NATALE!

Have a good one, and try not to-

Smash your head on fruitcake?

Ye- No! Well, that would be bad I guess, fruitcake is for eating, not wearing…

ANYWAY…. Farewell!

BUH BAH!

Salutations

...

That's a greeting, I thought?

Shut up.

FIN

Well, what did you think?

First person to list all the references wins a surprise!