I hope this is a joke.

What, you think atheists and muslims automatically have a different language?

And, genius, it's called *translations*...how else are people going to get you to convert if they don't translate it into a language you understand. But then, there are no doubt many mistranslations so you aren't even believing it entirely right. It was not at all written in English to start with, the English versions came long after the first.

I doubt Jesus could even write.