Restaurateur alumna shares ups and downs on “Real Housewives”

by Karen Shih ’09 | photos courtesy of Ashley Darby ’14 and Oz Arlington

It takes a lot to put your new marriage and new restaurant on national television—especially on a reality franchise that’s as well known for its dramatic divorces as it is for producing successful entrepreneurs.

“The Real Housewives of Potomac” star Ashley Darby ’14 is certain she’ll land only in the latter camp.

“I always tell people that reality TV doesn’t break up relationships—it just spotlights what already existed,” she says. “My husband Michael and I talked about it and thought we had a strong enough foundation, and so we went for it.”

The series, which will conclude its second season on Sunday, was an instant hit when it premiered in January 2016 with the highest viewership of any “Real Housewives” premiere in 11 years on Bravo. Each version follows affluent women in cities including Beverly Hills, Atlanta and New York City as they throw lavish parties, travel to exotic locations, gossip about each other—and flip the occasional table.

Darby is one of six main cast members on the Potomac iteration, which includes fellow Terp Robyn Dixon ’00, ex-wife of former Terps basketball star and current Coppin State Coach Juan Dixon ’13. Darby started as the odd woman out, knowing none of the other “housewives” before the show. But she quickly made her mark as the young, feisty upstart, who frequently stood up for her biracial identity among the predominantly African-American cast and defended her marriage to a man 29 years her senior.

“You have to grab the bull by the horns,” she says. “I didn’t hold back as to who I am.”

The show came at a perfect time for Darby and her husband to promote their new restaurant in Clarendon, Va., Oz, which features the Australian flavors of her husband’s homeland. They worked on the concept and interviewed potential employees on camera during the first season, while the second season has featured arguments between Darby and her husband as they struggle to develop a customer base.

“That’s really hard for us to watch. Even though everyone’s going to have their hiccups and bumps when they first open a business, ours was something we got to see again and again,” she says.

“One piece of advice I’d give anyone going into the restaurant business is to be more involved with community organizations and connect with the neighbors before you open. If I had my finger on the pulse a little more of what the local patrons needed, we could have made the switch from traditional Australian to Australian fusion sooner.”

Darby’s red-carpet life is one she couldn’t have imagined growing up in the house her grandfather built at the end of a gravel road in Sandy Spring, Md. Raised by a single mom, Darby started working in restaurants at age 14. She dreamed of becoming the next Maureen Bunyan, a popular D.C.-area TV anchor, so she studied communications at the University of Maryland.

But during her junior year at UMD in 2011, two events changed her path. She first met Michael while she was bartending in Georgetown. He offered her an internship at his company, Monument Realty, and at the end of the internship, she gathered up the courage to ask him out.

That same year, Darby won the Miss D.C. pageant on her first try. As the title holder, she was required to make many event appearances, so she ended up taking some time off from UMD.

“After that, I realized I wanted to do something more entertainment-related,” says Darby, who finished her degree in 2014.

Today, the restaurateur says the skills she learned in her communications classes are essential as she manages Oz and maintains the often-fraught relationships on her show. Being in the spotlight also means dealing with the millions of people who comment via social media on every aspect of her life.

“You’re bound to have some negativity because some people are just miserable,” Darby says. “But for the most part, people are generally very nice and sweet and positive. I really enjoy the fans.”

“And you know what? If you don’t like it, don’t watch it. We’re not trying to cause a paradigm shift here. We’re just living our lives.”

Watch Darby on the final part of the second-season reunion of “The Real Housewives of Potomac” at 8 p.m. July 16.