The last couple days have been the easiest of all. First, because of the holidays, I’ve managed to stay busy most of the time. Haven’t really had a chance to think about porn or masturbation all that much if at all.

But I’ve also noticed something weird. This is very odd so I’m going to try my best to explain it. The best way I can describe it is that my libido is all messed up.

I still feel “horny.” I feel like I want to have sex. I feel the tension. I see how beautiful my wife is. I see how beautiful all women are (especially the models when trying to do some Christmas shopping for my wife). But I don’t get aroused by it – my wife and I showered together this morning, and I didn’t get aroused once despite being naked with her. My previous approach to dealing with the sexual tension, obviously, was fire up some Internet porn and masturbate. But since I’ve removed that option, it’s like my body doesn’t know what to do with those feelings. It’s not translating those feelings of sexual desire into sexual arousal.

While I’m pretty sure this will pass – or at least that’s what I keep telling myself – I can’t help but feel unnerved by it. I almost feel like I’ve regressed a little bit.