(satire – barely)

A4e boss reveals tragic story of being bullied into a life of luxury by ruthless taxpayers

In her first TV interview since stepping down from A4e, Emma Harrison has told Channel 4 News of the dark days she had to endure after she was brutally bullied into paying herself £8.6 million of taxpayers’ money and mercilessly forced into a life of luxurious early retirement.

Ms Harrison was giving her first interview since she had to endure months of savage affluence and leisure after stepping down from A4e – the private company paid by the government to help long-term unemployed entrepreneurs find new and innovative ways of living a life of luxury at taxpayer’s expense.

The interview with Krishnan Guru-Murthy followed an exclusive report revealing that only four-in-100 people found a job through A4e, and focussed on how the defenceless millionairess had to endure miserable years of major payouts, massive bonuses and champagne dinners at the hands of heartless taxpayers.

Describing the media focus on A4e, Harrison said:

Despite begging for it to stop, I was bullied into paying myself £365,000 a year – on top of which I had to endure the indignity of giving myself over eight and half million as a bonus as well. I really think it’s time that this bullying of entrepreneurs by the British taxpayer is stopped before anyone else is forced into living in a big mansion on taxpayers’ money doing nothing apart from posing for photographs with their belly buttons on show like I had to.

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