Question Please, Mr. White Man. Tell me how I, a woman, felt while watching the Quiet scenes in MGSV. I clearly lack the mental capacity to decide how I felt myself, just like how I lack the willpower to stop myself from endlessly bitching about any game which dares to offend my absurd neo-Puritanical sensibilities.

Answer

Yowza. Okay, a few points to talk about here and I lack the brain capacity to write something intelligent this morning, so I’ll try my best to reply with a few bullet points.

1 - My video was expressing views that I hold myself, and that many women also express. Not imaginary women, but real women, who I talk to in real life and across the internet. Some who are gamers, some who are not. Regular people. By minimizing this view down to a single person or archetypal person you are protecting yourself, but ultimately missing a vocal viewpoint that a bunch of people hold. If you’re okay with that, that’s up to you. But the only way to properly engage in a conversation is to listen half the time. It’s difficult to listen to an opinion you fervently disagree with - but if you want to learn you have to. This is the same reason I’m replying to this post and not deleting it.

2 - I don’t speak for all women.

3 - You don’t speak for all women.

4- Speaking up for a underprivileged group that you are not a part of doesn’t take power away from them. Being silent for fear of rebuttal makes you part of the problem. So I had to say what I said about Quiet. It’s something I felt, and not saying it would make me a coward. I rather make some of my viewers uncomfortable than not be true to what I believe.

5 - It is perfectly possible to play through Metal Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain and really enjoy the character of Quiet and that’s okay. That is a valid opinion. In fact, many people in the office I work in hold that opinion. It’s also possible that other people, through their own biases, learned through their upbringing and life experience, may have a problem with the character.

6 - Try to remember that people who criticize aspects of games that you love, still love video games. I love Metal Gear Solid: The Phantom Pain. I used D-Horse instead of Quiet for many of the missions. I used Quiet when it made tactical sense. My critiques are because I respect creators enough to not give them a pass. Everyone fucks up, and in my opinion (one shared with many others) Quiet was a mis-step and part of a larger pattern of sexualizing female characters because male gamers like it. And I believe that it becoming increasingly unpopular as games grow in appeal.

7 - It’s not the responsibility of people who’s opinion you disagree with you to kowtow to yours. Your an adult and you live in a world where millions of people disagree with things you believe. We do our best to surround ourselves with people and values that align with ours. It makes us feel safe. But there are times when we can’t avoid being confronted with those opinions. You will be a happier person if you try and understand them rather than reacting to them so defensively. Your reaction is one based in fear. It’s why you’re so angry. But your reaction is not my responsibility. If you want to be part of the conversation, you have to truly listen and grow thicker skin.

8 - It’s not the only conversation in games, but it’s part of the conversation in games. In your response you allude to the idea that I can’t go five minutes without talking about this issue. This is totally incorrect and part of that defensive response. I talked up that game for weeks on Twitter. I’ve made multiple - videos about how much I love the design of that game. So when your brain tells you to “ignore me because I’m just one of those SJW’s” - that’s not me, that’s your brain.

9 - It is perfectly reasonable for me to think video games can and should do better than this…

Thanks for your message.