Salman Khan rides in on a bicycle along with dozens of extras dressed in shiny silver overalls and takes a lap around the arena waving to his fans. He says a few words about the event that he has been paid to promote before heading over to a makeshift stage where dozens of other extras have already gathered.

The 51-year-old actor then proceeds to try and shake a leg to a few of his hit Bollywood numbers, fails miserably and then calls upon his co-star from an upcoming movie and an infinitely better dancer, Katrina Kaif, to save the day.

The above scene is not from a Bollywood awards show, which has often seen farce of a similar nature over the years. But that is still understandable considering the genre. What transpired on Friday evening was at the Jawaharlal Nehru Stadium in Kochi, which was hosting the opening ceremony and match of the fourth season of the Indian Super League.

Why the tournament needed an opening ceremony is a different matter altogether but for a league whose tagline is “Future hai Football”, the events of Friday evening went ahead to prove just the opposite.

Khan was not done yet. After dancing with Kaif to a couple of their songs together, he went ahead to engage Indian cricket legend and co-owner of Kerala Blasters franchise Sachin Tendulkar in a rather nonsensical conversation, the effect of which was visible on the face of the cricketer’s wife Anjali Tendulkar whenever the television camera panned to her.

Khan went ahead to do the same with the captains of the two teams playing the inaugural match of the season, one of whom was a foreigner and clearly had no clue what was going on. Khan then invited on stage the ISL’s chairperson Nita Ambani, whose only effort at promoting her league was to repeat the taglines of “Future hai Football” and “Come on, India, let’s Football”, and some other cliches.

It was then the turn of a local favourite, Malayalam actor Mammootty, to come on the stage. The 66-year-old tried his best to look two decades younger by dyeing his hair and beard, and walked into the arena comically holding a football over his head before handing it over to Ambani as a ceremonial gesture.

Mammootty too had little to say to Kochi’s football fans before the five celebrities clicked a selfie and walked off, leaving Kerala Blasters captain Sandesh Jhingan, his ATK counterpart Carl Baker and surely a majority of Indian football fans bewildered at what had just happened, but perhaps a bit relieved too that the tamasha was now over. Let’s finally football, shall we?

From left: Mammootty, Katrina Kaif, Nita Ambani, Salman Khan and Sachin Tendulkar (Image: ISL/SPORTZPICS

The ISL and its franchise format is modelled on cricket’s immensely successful Indian Premier League, which also has its fair share of razzmatazz with celebrity owners, cheerleaders and Bollywood actors dancing at opening ceremonies. But the difference is that cricket in India already has a huge following, and formidable grassroots and domestic structure. It does not really need an IPL to promote it.

Football and ISL are hardly in the same bracket. For a league that claims to be committed to “revolutionise the sport” in the country and “elevate Indian football to an international level”, the ISL failed miserably with Friday’s opening ceremony farce.

Instead of paying Khan and Kaif to promote their upcoming movie together, could the ISL not have invited a single football celebrity for the opening ceremony?

The ISL no longer features the likes of Italian legends Alessandro Del Piero and Marco Materazzi, and Uruguay’s Diego Forlan, but it still has a few famous current and former footballers such as Robbie Keane, Dimitar Berbatov and Teddy Sheringham. Closer to home, Bhaichung Bhutia, arguably India’s most famous footballer, was nowhere to be seen.

The promoters of ISL – IMG-Reliance, Star India and the All India Football Federation – have otherwise made a good effort over the last three to four years to develop a strong grassroots structure in the country in a bid to groom footballing talent.

But when you hire Salman Khan to talk drivel and egg the fans who have come to watch a football match to chant “Sachin! Sachin!”, you’re really defeating the purpose.