Even though it is untrue, it's good to overstate it's satire, just in case there are any ancient Egyptians who would take issue.

It is revealed: a recently uncovered tomb of Pharaoh Bitacoinakahn revealed the true source of the Satoshi White Paper. It was actually a centuries-old plan devised by Egyptian royalty to further gain control of the commoner.

A deeply superstitious people, the ancient Egyptians believed in powers from spells, rituals, and a mysterious level of control from those who claimed to be deities. So, Pharaoh "B" as he liked to be called, developed, what is described in hieroglyphics (has anyone noticed how strange the names are that science uses to describe some old stuff?) as "a magic money that can travel from one deity to the next without proof".

If each person of high social regard used real gold to purchase Bitacoinakahn magic money gold, shortened to BTC, a public key, also known as a stone, would be added to build the pyramid. When each of these people passed the concept on to someone else, they became a member of their down-chain, another stone was added, and the first person earned more BTC as a referral.

It seems that Bita-Coin can be explained for how the pyramids were built, and also as the first successful pyramid scheme.

A ledger system was developed to keep up with everyone's payouts, again, in hieroglyphs, each showing a depiction of that person holding a B-Stone, and underneath were depictions of those in their down-chain, hence calling this a block-chain.

The tomb of Pharaoh "B" shows a mummified man preserved in cloth, holding a large gold disc with his initials inscribed, and the disc simply says "magic mystery gold".

As of December 27, 2019, Bita-Coin is valued at $7223.

Gordon Freeman Out.

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