See that little guy up there? That's Ripley, my tuxedo cat. (Yes, he is named after Sigourney Weaver's character in Alien.) A while back I uploaded a picture and a Vine of Ripley to my phone. Then a few months later I did something I'd so far managed to avoid on my original HTC One: I swiped left on the home screen and entered the BlinkFeed zone. You should never enter the BlinkFeed zone.

BlinkFeed is one of several forgettable flavors of Android that its fans are forced to endure, but as I discovered, HTC's may actually be the creepiest. Headlining above updates from my various social streams was a thumbnail for this video of my cat — a video I had never seen.

I did not make this video. My phone made this video, on its own, and left it on my doorstep like a vole to the slaughter.

Then it made this video:

I sold the phone.