I have been in the IT field for over 20 years, I have been a contractor for the North East of the US for almost as long. At this time I probably been on over 100 interviews, I’ve held through contracting over 40 jobs. It’s not glorious, but I have seen every form of interview there seems to be.

That being said, I have read the question, and will say that there are multiple things that are not stated, but I have to say out of everything that I saw, there were mistakes on both sides, if your friend didn’t think what you wrote down but said instead. Saying Dogmatic or some form of it in a meeting is normally a game changer and not for the best.

If they said what the OP said as well, I agree, bad on them… but this may of also of been more of a between the lines thing that the interviewee saw as well. Which is useful, but if both parties don’t have it, there is an awkwuard state and one or the other is going to have to break the other’s heart or ego.

Your friend, though, in my opinion, did the right thing instead of wasting the time of the people. I have been in similar situations in the past and have done the same thing. I did it politely though. Yes, there are normally hurt feelings, but at times it depends on the situation as well.

I’ve been interviewed by hostile people, aggressive people, and people who let me control the interview. I’ve actually left an interview feeling like I was the bloody owner of the company instead of being interviewed for the lower level jobs at the time.

The one thing that bothers me is that people who are young (mid 20s and early 30s) are part of a “ME Generation”, as well as the “Why Generation”. Things have been in many cases given things to them on a silver platter. Told they can do anything, and in many cases prove they can’t… but those that do, and startup companies sometimes are of the same generation mentality. Now they feel they are in the seat of power they can run it how they feel will benefit them the best.

When you have been interviewed by people like this, you realize the environment will not work well for you if you are closer to 40 than 30 like me, you will realize that in many cases the attitude of management who wants a free roaming environment is not meant for you. Even if they are attempting to get you in, has to realize the generational gap. People of my generation, those who are between the boomers and gen-exers tend to like a more uniformed format.

We are being left behind for the instant gratification generation.

What happened to your friend is more or less not a bad interview, bad a bad pairing at the beginning. People need to take into consideration not only that there is now with older people working, going to be where the boss may be 10 to 15+ years younger than you, but your experience out strips him or her, and that is also another uncomfortable situation as well.

When do you tell the person who is interviewing that the fit isn’t there and that you can see it, even though they can’t? Sometimes you can be as gentle as you can be and they will still take offense. Sometimes learning the hard way is the best lesson.

What should have been taken into consideration before even brining in this person is their prior experience. Where did they work? Did they work for Apple, or did they work for HP? Which one did they last at longer? Did they go to a university like Harvard, or did they go to a community college and work their way to Harvard? That will tell you significantly if the person will work out.

Again, past experience tells a lot about a person. If you want everyone to be buddy-buddy at the work place, don’t pick someone who has been in the field longer than you’ve been out of diapers. Don’t pick someone who has had a corporate environment experience and expect to be ready for the Google Environment.

I probably would have done the same thing, but I probably would have asked them if they would think of hiring me as a consultant, or as a remote worker. Suggesting things like this may have allowed the job opportunity not to go awry.

Jobs are few and far in-between today. The best thing to do is not waste each other's time on an opportunity that isn’t going to be there after the interview is over.