by Peterson Toscano

Then Jesus was led by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil. After fasting forty days and forty nights, he was hungry. The tempter came to him and said, “If you are the Son of God, tell these stones to become bread.” Jesus answered, “It is written: ‘Man shall not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.’” Then the devil took him to the holy city and had him stand on the highest point of the temple. “If you are the Son of God,” he said, “throw yourself down. For it is written: “‘He will command his angels concerning you, and they will lift you up in their hands, so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.’” Jesus answered him, “It is also written: ‘Do not put the Lord your God to the test.’” Again, the devil took him to a very high mountain and showed him all the kingdoms of the world and their splendor. “All this I will give you,” he said, “if you will bow down and worship me.” Jesus said to him, “Away from me, Satan! For it is written: ‘Worship the Lord your God, and serve him only.’” Then the devil left him, and angels came and attended him. (Matthew 4:1-11)

I get bored often, but these days I do not usually feel the full weight of boredom. It’s easy for me to spend hours clicking through screens as I distract myself from boredom. I grow weary of the buffet of Internet options, but persist, believing yet another delight, laugh, outrage, sexual thrill, or even an interaction with a fellow digital nomad is just a click away.

I remember though a very different kind of boredom that existed before the Internet saturated society.

How often as a child, I sat on the couch looking out the window moaning as if in physical pain, “I am sooooo bored!” Or “I’m dying of boredom!” Being completely bored feels awful. That feeling of “there’s NOTHING to do!” is crushing. No wonder we flee from boredom today, and use digital stimulation on our minds and bodies in much the same way I use a transcutaneous electrical nerve stimulation (TENS) unit on my lower back for the pain that sometimes plagues me. I still feel pain, but the tiny electrical shocks interfere with its full impact. It tricks my mind into thinking it is not so bad. The temporary relief is a blessing, but doesn’t solve any problems. I then must increase the intensity of the shocks until it is surging so high it starts to hurt and I must switch it off.

Fully felt boredom actually comes with a special blessing. The dreadful emptiness we feel can suddenly lead us to do or think something fresh and new. Coming face to face with an oppressive blank slate and feeling its full weight often results in a sudden pivot to a new action, one we would never have considered while being endlessly placated by the Internet or other distractions.

Out of the awful funk, our brain activates and provides pathways to actions that rise to meet our longings. Simple pleasures or even profound revelations can jolt us with sudden force and even joy. I can bake cookies. I need to visit my friend and see how she is doing. I’m going for a walk. I will draw something. Let’s see if anyone is playing ultimate frisbee. I want to work in the campus garden. I feel like reading my favorite book. Or Oh wow, I just got an idea for that lenten devotional Kayla asked me to write!