Human woman and Conservative MP Michelle Rempel says she is tired of telling her female staffers not to hit the men they work with so could you, the nation’s men, just not? One of them agreed. Sarah Beuhler and Nora Loreto warn: she may sound like Gloria Steinem but is actually The Man. Similarly, Emily Leedham writes that Rempel’s party is to feminism what Darth Vader is to Rebel Alliance. Female staffers on the Hill would like some bathrooms nearby so I feel like this feminist in-fight can maybe wait until after they get that.

Being a woman on the internet is truly a gift pic.twitter.com/CmQHdz0AkU — shiba e-news (@amy_wood) April 20, 2016

The Duffy expenses trial is over as Judge Vaillancourt has cleared Mike Duffy of all 31 charges. The judge describes the military precision of the PMO’s plot, concluding, “However, in the context of a democratic society, the plotting as revealed in the emails can only be described as unacceptable.” He’s right: email is undemocratic and unacceptable.

In other legal news, CANADALAND found that the car Jian Ghomeshi drove was, in fact, a yellow VW despite the judge’s finding otherwise. On that basis, at least one lawyer says that is grounds for an appeal. One of the complainants, Linda Redgrave, says she would be willing to appeal. For both cases, investigative reporting served the public in a way the courts have not.

Supreme Court of Canada Just Overturns The Years 2006-2015 To Just Save Everyone The Suspense #headlines — Aaron Wudrick (@awudrick) April 15, 2016

Kelly misspeller and Conservative leadership candidate Kellie Leitch now regrets being a spokesperson for the Barbaric Cultural Practices and Report A Brown Person tip line. Indigenous Affairs Minister Carolyn Bennett was greeted in Attawapiskat with Aboriginal songs like “yo, what the fuck?” and “what is wrong with y’all?” The rest of you can start helping by putting your Shift button to good use. You could also add Indigenous journalists and publications to your life and it’ll make you a better person.

People — including CANADALAND publisher and hater of fun Jesse Brown — are still mad that the Prime Minister tried to look knowledgeable, so Paul Wells explains how a scrum works: “a scrum will probably not reduce a political leader to a quivering, weeping ruin of exposed incompetence.” Which is what Justin “the one-two punch” Trudeau faced on his adventure to New York City. He took the time to film Rocky VII: Some Underwhelming Boxing.

I really hate the “bring nerds into the newsroom” catchphrase. Like, what did you think the newsroom was full of before? Out-of-work actors? — Troy Griggs (@TroyEricG) April 19, 2016

The National Post livestreamed their staff eating slices of American cheese which is — a moment of silence, please – pretty gouda journalism. [Standing ovation here.] I can’t wait for next year’s Pulitzer for Food-based Live Streams. The staff quit on the veritable feast at 23 slices as if free food awaits every journalist.

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NOT SORRY is written by Vicky Mochama who actually loves our weekly feminist in-fight. Like Grendel’s mother, feminism is a complex beast and entirely worth grappling with. Give your money to CANADALAND so they can give some to me, a feminist. Subscribe. @ Us.