“The whole redemption thing?”Ben Stokes says as he raises an eyebrow on a quiet morning at Lord’s. He does not look convinced as all the intensity and the glory of the summer has long since drained away. Stokes helped England win the World Cup amid wild drama in July and then produced the most extraordinary comeback win in the history of the Ashes at Headingley six weeks later. Less than a year earlier he had been cleared of affray in Bristol’s crown court after an altercation outside a nightclub in September 2017 cost him the England vice-captaincy, his place on the last Ashes tour and threatened his freedom and career.

He shrugs and smiles in a way which shows that his pride is still streaked with hurt. “People have tried to label this as Ben’s redemption summer,” he suggests, slipping into the third person for the only time in our hour together. “I don’t see it like that at all. I see it as me going out and trying to do as well as I possibly can to help England win games.”

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He relaxes a little and unfolds his arms when I tell him about a conversation I had with Alastair Cook , his close friend and former England captain. Cook, who rarely makes any outrageous claims, stressed that Stokes was the most selfless teammate he had played alongside. He also suggested that, once he was acquitted, Stokes worked harder than ever as a cricketer.

“I think when you know what might happen,” Stokes says with a nod, before pausing as memories of Bristol return. “Obviously there were points throughout that whole thing when we weren’t sure what was going to happen.”

His voice trails away. Did he return with more determination to make the most of his talent?

“It’s a tough one to answer. But I think I was driven by the idea of not letting anybody down. I can still let people down on the cricket field when it comes to skills and mistakes. There might be a point where you’re not good enough anymore, or you go through a bad run of form. But if something happened in the game which affected the result and it was down to my fitness or concentration? That’s what I’m trying to avoid.”

Facebook Twitter Pinterest Ben Stokes dives to make his ground but the ball deflects off his bat for four overthrows in the World Cup final against New Zealand. Photograph: Tom Jenkins/The Guardian

The World Cup final and Headingley were excruciatingly tense. Stokes showed astonishingly varied skills in two different formats – but his commitment was even more impressive than his imperious batting. Desire and grit, those very human feelings, were evident in almost every shot Stokes played. They were such authentic innings, rather than storybook miracles, because it did not look as if Stokes enjoyed the ferocious intensity with so much depending on him.

“You can’t enjoy it until it’s over. Both the World Cup final and Headingley would’ve been soul-destroying if we hadn’t won them. It would’ve been a dagger in the heart regardless of what I did. I could have walked off having scored 84 in the final. People would’ve said: ‘Oh, great knock,’ but I wouldn’t have cared. At Headingley, if I’d got out for 120, people would’ve again said: ‘Unbelievable effort.’ But it wouldn’t have mattered if we’d lost. People have asked me which means more – the final or Headingley. It’s like choosing between two threes and a six. You can’t. The only difference is that after the World Cup there was something to show for the efforts.”

Headingley was one of two England victories in a drawn series which meant Australia retained the Ashes. Stokes scored 135 not out and he and Jack Leach, who was not out on 1 , shared an unbroken 73-run partnership for the last wicket as England chased down 359. It was an incredible achievement. “I might be able to say more clearly, in 20 years’ time,” Stokes says, “but right here, right now, I can’t choose between the two.”

Stokes is doing this interview to publicise a new book about his role in “England’s summer to remember”, which is at its most interesting when it reveals snippets of the vulnerability beneath the miracle-man persona. After England lost World Cup games to Pakistan, Sri Lanka and Australia, they had to beat India and New Zealand in their last two group matches to reach the semi-finals. Stokes admits that, “I was certainly feeling the strain and I told David Young, our team psychologist, as much as after he invited me for a coffee. He said, ‘How are things, Ben?’ I told him, ‘I’m nervous’ and opened up.”

Facebook Twitter Pinterest Joe Root and Ben Stokes celebrate winning the World Cup final. Photograph: Clive Mason/Getty Images

Young was so struck by Stokes’s honesty he asked him to share his doubts and fears with the squad. Stokes stood up and rather than adopt the usual line about being ready for battle he told his teammates: “I am nervous, I am anxious, I am worrying about what happens if we don’t win. Believe me, I am worried.” In showing his apprehension Stokes was able to normalise these emotions for everyone else.

“As professional sportsmen at the top of the game we do have worries,” he says. “We do think of the worst and that’s absolutely fine. There’s no weakness in feeling like that. That was such a crucial thing – for us all to sit down as a team and discuss. People started to open up. Once they vented their feelings it made everyone feel a lot better because, sometimes, you can feel as if you’re the only person thinking that way. But if you don’t get nervous you’re probably telling a little white lie.”

Stokes had suffered doubts before, on a tour of the West Indies when, as he says: “I was scared of getting out. After I eventually spoke about it to Alastair Cook I went out and played the best I had in a long time. I don’t think it’s a coincidence.”

This summer, before the fourth Ashes Test, Jos Buttler confided his own insecurities about his Test match batting to Stokes. “I wasn’t prepared for it really,” Stokes admits. “But he just asked me straight out and we discussed my experiences in the West Indies. Once Jos addressed it, he then showed in that Manchester game and the last match what he’s capable of as a Test batsman. Again, it’s no coincidence that it followed letting out those emotions to someone.”

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When he was a teenager making his debut for Cumbria, Stokes vomited with nerves the day before. Confronting those fears, and then harnessing his emotions more positively, seems central to his game. “Embracing it as well. Embracing the fact that fear is natural. I haven’t come close to spewing up the day before a game since then. Sometimes you feel fine. You might have a day when you feel awful about what’s going to happen in the game. It ebbs and flows. Just embrace it.”

Over the last year, in both one-day and Test cricket, Stokes has resolved to turn an eye-catching 30 or 40 into an innings of greater substance. He has curbed some of his fiery instincts to ensure he is still there at the death. At Headingley he came out to bat when England were still 218 runs short and three wickets down. Stokes, the IPL masterblaster, played with Boycott-esque caution. It took him 67 balls to score three runs and his half-century, when it finally came the following morning, was the slowest he had scored. Stokes’s discipline and restraint were both agonising and moving. Was it also framed by guilt – sparked less by Bristol than the poor shot he had played in the first innings when England were bowled out for 67 .

“It was the worst shot of my career,” Stokes exclaims with a grimacing laugh. “There you go.”

Is that why he pummelled himself so hard in the Australian second innings, bowling an unbroken spell of 16 overs? “I’ve bowled long spells before in Test matches. Those moments when you are behind in the game like we were – moments where you want to be seen to be working hard and not just letting them cruise to a total. Someone said it’s a sign to the opposition that, ‘We ain’t giving in here even though you’re miles ahead.’ I got into a rhythm where Joe [Root] just kept asking me ‘One more?’ I was like: ‘Yeah.’ One more? Yeah. I was about to stop but Jofra [Archer] got cramp and I said: ‘I’m good to go. Just gimme the ball.’ The first five overs are generally the hardest. But you get to a point and everything just feels fresh, and you can bowl all day. Still, at the end of the day you feel like …”

Stokes imitates a decrepit old man. “I was thinking clearly again when I went out to bat. I finished the third day on two not out after 50-odd balls. If I was going to get out it needed a good ball to dismiss me. Time wasn’t an issue so I was ready to defend everything Australia threw at me.”

Facebook Twitter Pinterest Ben Stokes and Jack Leach celebrate after their last-wicket stand led to victory at Headingley against Australia. Photograph: Tom Jenkins/The Guardian

It still required a mammoth individual effort to win the match and he and Leach produced one of the most famous last-wicket partnerships in Test history. Did they talk much to each other in the middle? “Not really. Sometimes Jack and me came face to face and I’d be like: ‘Oh, mate, you’re doing well.’ There was nothing tactical to speak about, except when he first walked out. I said: ‘I’m going to take all the deliveries here and you keep ’em out for one ball of the over if you have to.’ He knew exactly what he had to do, which was just to survive.

“I couldn’t watch when Jack was facing – and that wasn’t through not trusting him. It was because when I wasn’t on strike I couldn’t do anything. I was helpless. That’s probably the most emotion you’d see from me. When I’m on strike I’m just [Stokes makes a deadpan face]. But when Leachy is on strike I’m just head down. I don’t think we’ll ever forget sharing those moments on the field together. We bought the painting of it at the PCA [Professional Cricketers’ Association] dinner because that’s one of the most special things you can ever share with a teammate.”

Even more than the glory it seems as if Stokes was motivated by a quest to win back the vice-captaincy. In his book he reveals how he sent a text to Tom Harrison, the chief executive of the England and Wales Cricket Board, in which he pleaded to be allowed to become vice-captain again. Stokes is clearly a leader in the England camp but it’s significant he craved the legitimacy of a formal role being given back to him. Perhaps it is one more way of closing the chapter on the Bristol case.

“I never voiced anything of importance at the ECB before,” Stokes, who was reappointed in July, says. “But this mattered to me and so I just did it. When Joe got appointed captain I got appointed vice-captain. Being in a role like that is [he puffs out his cheeks to convey the magnitude to him]. You never imagine when you start playing you’re going to be in such a high role. Vice-captain can sound like it doesn’t mean anything. But honestly, I was so proud to be vice-captain of this team. When it got taken away from me, which was completely understandable, I was like: ‘I really want this back.’ I felt like Joe needed me too. I’m not being arrogant – we work so well together. We’re such good friends.’

In the book, it sounds as if Root had also been campaigning for Stokes to return as his deputy. “Yeah, he had been.”

Stokes believes he can lighten the load on Root – who sometimes seemed weighed down by the burdens of captaincy during the Ashes . “Yeah. Massively. If everything goes smoothly, and you win everything, it’s only going to last for a certain amount of time before things start going against you. And Joe is a young captain. He’s still got so many years ahead of him. He’s going to learn from everything this summer. That’s only going to help him become a better captain. He’s got the experience of being under pressure. People say that his batting’s been affected by the captaincy. But I say as soon as he’s got his pads on he’s Joe Root the batsman.

Facebook Twitter Pinterest Ben Stokes poses in the Long Room at Lord’s. Photograph: Tom Jenkins/The Guardian

“In the summer I felt I had to let him know I’m there for him because being England captain has a huge amount of pressure. As his vice-captain I’ll try to make it as easy as possible for him. If he ever needs to vent or speak about anything I’m there for him. He appreciates it.”

Root may eventually decide, as Cook did, that he would like to return to the ranks as just a batsman. If that should happen in the next few years would Stokes like the job of England captain?

Stokes nods with certainty. “I couldn’t say no to that.”

Talismanic all-rounders like Ian Botham and Andrew Flintoff did not succeed as England captains. Would Stokes be different? “You’ve got no idea. You never know until you have to walk out there with that responsibility on your shoulders.”

Stokes smiles with the glint of a man who thrives on responsibility and, after everything he has experienced, craves it. After the interview, as we stroll down to the Long Room at Lord’s for a photo session with Stokes at his chattiest and most relaxed, the prospect lingers. It could be a fascinating experiment and clearly, after a consuming and exhilarating summer, Stokes would back himself to be a leader rather than just a maverick.

Ben Stokes – On Fire: My Story of England’s Summer to Remember is published by Headline