I’m more than a decade removed from my punk rock phase, but even still, I can’t help but cringe at the sorry state the scene has devolved into. Long gone are the glory days of Rancid, Bouncing Souls, and Madball; now the genre’s torchbearers can be found on the Warped Tour circuit playing to 15-year-olds whose outfits come courtesy of the Punk Rock Starter Kit.

“Did you recently see some punks at the mall, thought they looked sick and want to join the freak show? Well now you can with the kit that has everything you need for the other punks to stop calling you a poser.” That’s the opening pitch for said starter kit, which is now available on Etsy for the low price of $85.00.



Among the included items:

-Bootstrap studded with small (your’re just starting out) 77 cone studs

-Bondage belt

-Studded bracelet with bondage wring

-Studded wristband

–Totalitar and Varukers patches

-Mystery goody!

Oh, but wait, there’s more…

You also get a “list of cool bands to listen to and of attitude and fashion faux pas for your new look”! See, it’s still kind of about the music.

R.I.P. Punk, 1976-2014.