LINTON, IN—While sitting at the Sportsman Pub’s bar Thursday, local man Gregory Quinn, who has never felt so lonely and isolated in his entire life, reportedly announced that the Golden State Warriors had really torn up the NBA Summer League. “After going undefeated, they totally deserved the Summer League title,” said the sad-looking Go-Rent-A Car employee who desperately wants to have some kind of human contact. “Ian Clark may have won the MVP, but that kid [Kent] Bazemore stuck out as a player with real potential.” At press time, Quinn declared “Andre Iguodala was a solid pick up” while silently wondering if anybody would miss him if he died.

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