LYING ABOUT OUR ESTABLISHMENT DATE SINCE 1786 Follow @dylanrhymer LYING ABOUT OUR ESTABLISHMENT DATE SINCE 1786

About Dylan Rhymer

MINIMUM WAGE AGAINST THE MACHINE

STEPHEN POLOZ: "YOUNG CANADIANS SHOULD GIVE FREE BLOWJOBS FOR WORK"

PUTIN'S POPULARITY SOARS AMONG RUSSIANS WHO HAVE LOADED GUNS AIMED AT THEIR HEADS

EBOLA AND BEHEADING ANNOUNCE THEY'RE DATING, CREATING HORRIBLE NEWS POWER COUPLE

EZRA LEVANT REMINDS ME OF A BLIMP FULL OF SHIT

DESPERATE CAMERON WOOS SCOTLAND WITH PROMISE OF FREE HAGGIS AND HEROIN AND KILTS AND WHATEVER

FIRST NATIONS SLAM PERMANENT FOREIGN WORKERS PROGRAM

COPENHAGEN ZOO KILLS JANITOR, FEEDS TO LIONS

People Not Dying Of Painful Tumors Uphold Law Forcing People Dying Of Painful Tumors To Die Of Painful Tumors

An Open Letter To The East Van Tagger Calling Himself "Anoy"

SOTW FILM REVIEW: THE WORLD'S END

CIA Spies On Yelp, Urbanspoon Users To Build Database Of First World Problems

As Calgary Rebuilds, The Rest Of Canada Returns To Thinking It's Better Than Alberta

George Zimmerman Devastated Over Death Of Glee Star Cory Monteith

Jesus Trampled After Crucifixion Re-enactment Scheduled On Same Weekend As The Running Of The Bulls

Invention of Sentient, Self-Aware Gun That Loves Killing People Forces NRA To Change Their Slogan

Anti-Gentrification Vandalism Results In More Gentrification

Canada Deploys 350 Passive-Aggressive Troops To Mali

Deadly Bangladesh Garment Factory Fire Results In Huge Savings For Customers, Says Walmart

Irish Catholics Saddened By Death Of Fetus. And Maybe The Mother Too, They Guess

Obama Wins, Imposes Sharia Law; "Fools! You Should Have Listened To Chuck Norris!"

The Obama & Mitt Show Approaches Tearful, 20-Hour Finale

Army To Go School-To-School Beating Up Bullies

All The People In Cars Mad At All The People In Cars

Don't Burn The Koran. Don't Burn Cities. Everybody Stop Burning Things!

The Talented Mr Romney (Movie Trailer)

A Honky-Dory Thanksgiving Prayer

E.coli Outbreak Caused By Bacteria Found In Agr. Minister Gerry Ritz's Walrus Moustache

Atheist Mobs Riot Over FB Photo Deemed Offensive To Richard Dawkins

SOTW: FUCK THIS WEEK! Trudeau, Married Jesus & Babies In Bars

Politicians Having Non-Threatening Conversation About Abortion Rights But Don't Worry About It. Really.

SOTW IN HISTORIA (SEPT 12, 1944): Barry White Born, Praises Mother's Sweet, Sweet Uterus

Parliament Resumes, Peter MacKay Won't Shut Up About Burning Man

SOTW HISTORIA: (SEPT 6, 1997) Elton John Performs "Candle In The Wind" At Diana's Funeral, Rousing Encore Of "Crocodile Rock"

SOTW IN HISTORIA: (SEPT 3, 1969) First ATM Open For Business, Immediately Pissed On

Pro-Life Governor Opposed To Abortion "Except In Cases Where My Daughter Is Knocked Up By Her Black Boyfriend"

Neil Armstrong Was Faked, Insist Conspiracy Theorists

Republican Right Won't Shut Up About Abortion, Gay Marriage For Just One Fucking Weekend

SOTW On Comedy: Competitions Are Popularity Contests, And That's A Good Thing

BULLSHIT HISTORY MOMENT: (Aug 24, 1812) British Burn Down White House, Canada Brags For Next 200 Years

Todd Akin Gang-Raped By Ducks, Plans To Carry Fetus To Birth

This Day In History: Aug 21, 1959 Hawaii Becomes 50th State Just To Fake Obama's U.S. Citizenship In The Future

Harper To Stand Next To A Tree And Smile During Northern Tour

No, Let's Talk About Bill Hicks

Chick Fil-A Merely A Front For Killing Gay Chickens

Anti-Wheat Board Forces Liberate Saskatchewan From Fascist Wheat Barons

Wealthy Republicans Develop Cyborg Candidate To Run In 2016

Dear America: Your New Boyfriend Mitt Romney Is A Huge Dickhead

Joe Paterno Statue Removal Upsets Fans Of Football And Child Molestation

NRA Reaches Out To Families Of Colorado Shooting Victims With Free Movie Tickets

GREAT OF THE WEEK! Awesome Guy Writes Own Obituary: Confesses To A Fake PHD, Stolen Safe & Love For His Wife

On Daniel Tosh: The Only Thing Unfunnier Than A Rape Joke Is Someone With No Sense Of Humour

LAPD Heroes Rescue Porn Theatre From Elderly Actor's Genitals

Sorry! But Daniel Tosh Still Doesn't Owe Anyone An Apology (Tosh Rant Part 2)

Focus On The Family: "Heat Wave Is God's Punishment For Gays Being Such Hotties"

Harper Announces Creation Of "Ministry Of Attack Ads"

Mitt Romney Booed Off Stage On Showtime At The Apollo

Homeless Man Goes Undercover As FOX News Pundit John Stossel

Obama And Romney Agree To Postpone Election Indefinitely To Focus On Fundraising Full-Time

London To Advertise On Riot Police During 2012 Olympics

Harper Devours Massive Plate Of Asbestos Too Woo Quebec Voters And Silence Critics

Facebook Back On The Map With "Drunk Message Filter" For Users

SOTW SUNDAY RANT: When Politicians Start Bringing My Food, Then They Can Have Tips

Catholic Priest Shocks Canada With Scandal That Has Nothing To Do With Child Molestation

'God Particle' Discovered, Hates Homosexuals

GlaxoSmithKline Unveils New Paxil For Babies

Canada Celebrates Something Or Other With The Same Old Shit

Harper To Commemorate War Of 1812 By Rolling Back Civil Rights 200 Years

Both Obama And Romney Confused By Egypt's Enthusiasm For Democratic Process

Quebec Sex Workers Under Fire For Failing To Provide Blowjobs In Both Official Languages

Chrétien Shocked Bob Rae Won't Lead Party He Ruined Before Jumping Ship 10 Years Ago

Vancouver Unveils New "Riot Lanes"

Producers Of "Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 2" Admit They Forgot To Make The Movie

Toronto's Murderers Join Opposition To Plastic-Bag Ban

Inuktitut Bible Helps Bore And Terrify Inuit Children In Their Own Language

MacKay Defends Use Of Drones; "Mindless Robots With No Accountability Is What The Tory Government Is All About"

HATE OF THE WEEK: Stephanie Gray And Her Giant Truck With Mutilated Fetuses All Over It

SOTW DEBATE OF THE WEEK: New York's Ban On Soft Drinks: A Nanny State?

Donald Trump Insists President Obama Was Born A Black Guy

Plenty Of Fish Goes Public, Stock Valued At $58 Actually Worth .33 Cents

STUDY: Fox News Viewers Less Informed Than Dar the Beastmaster From The Time Vortex

SOTW Debate Of the Week: Albertan Creationist Vs Articulate Macaque on Evolution

Old White People In NB Excited By Visit From Old White Couple From England

SOTW RANT: An Open Letter to Finance Minister Jim Flaherty

Ottawa Anti-Abortion Rally Results In 53 Unwanted Pregnancies

North Carolina Bans "Bromance"

Hockey Rioters to be Burned Alive in Massive Wicker Man

Rupert Murdoch Announces Fox News Kids Network

Virginia Moves to Outlaw Mestruation

Raising Kids Amid the Yuppies, Hipsters and Flakes in Vancouver's Trendiest Neighbourhood

Peter Kent Defends Calling All Environmentalists "A Bunch of Raging Child Molesters"

SOTW RANT: If Your Shallow Worldview Can Be Summed Up On An Ugly Yellow T-Shirt, Your Life Is Already Wasted

NRA Endorses Florida's "Must Stalk And Shoot Unarmed Black Teenagers" Bill

Tories Plan To Catapult Tar Sands Oil Over Native Lands

Vancouver Mayor Unveils Affordable, Eco-Friendly, Cardboard Housing

Ministers Debate When A Pro Life Private Member's Motion Actually Begins

NS Catholics Hold Bake Sale to Help Pay For Paedophile Priests' Legal Fees

Stupid Thing Dominates Internet For 20th Straight Year

Tories Replace Environment Canada With A Magic 8 Ball

Space Program Budget Cuts, Canadarm Hits Skid Row

Rupert Murdoch Admits He Read Your Teenage Daughter's Diary

SOTW EASTER RANT: I'll Take Happy Monkeys Over Horny Monks

Tories Move To Scrap Land Mine Registry

MacKay Lured Into F-35 Deal By Cal Worthington With Bouncy Castle, Free Hot Dogs

CBC Downsizes 700 Jobs and Replaces Them with Jian Ghomeshi

A Letter From CEO Howard Skittles: Please Stop Saying "Skittles" Every Time You Mention That Bigot Psycho Zimmerman

Harper Pilots A Boeing 767 Until Air Canada Strike Is Resolved

New iPad3's Features Include The Number 3 And The Word "New'

GOP Candidates Try Appealing To One Brain-Damaged, Masturbating Chimp

Harper Announces Ottawa-BC Bullshit Pipeline

SOTW ADDRESS: In Kirk Cameron’s Defense, He’s Kirk Cameron

Limbaugh Demands a Spanking From "Sluts" at Planned Parenthood, Begins Squealing Like a Pig

Harper Issues Thousands of Robo-Calls Reminding People He Knew Nothing About Robo-Calls Scandal

SOTW ADDRESS: Describing Atheism to Morons

NDP Finally Decide On A Place To Go For Pizza

SOTW ADDRESS: Guns Protected, Women Forgotten

Harper Fires Judges, Pronounces Himself "Judge Dredd"

A Letter From Chris Brown to All the Ladies

HATE OF THE WEEK: Chris Brown & Everyone Who Didn't Murder Him On Stage

SOTW ADDRESS Feb 5th, 2012: The Superbowl Vs Roe Vs Wade?

Desperate Protesters Occupy Playground in Affluent Vancouver Neighborhood

Vancouver Bans Drinking Alcohol in Bars

Greece Takes Out €100M PayDay Loan From Money Mart

US-Iran Relations Collapse After Ambassador Hulk Hogan Piledrives The Iron Sheik

Ron Paul Quits GOP Race After Being Sexually Harassed By Rick Santorum

SOTW Editorial: Hitchens Dies, Catholic Priest Molests 38 Kids

N Korean Burger Kings Name Kim Jong-Un "Supreme Burger Kim"

BARFLY EDITORIAL: Happy HypoChristmas from the Pope!

Harper Vows to Abolish Santa's Naughty / Nice Registry

Peter MacKay Under Fire For Having His Balls Coated in 14-K Gold

Juggalo's Must Remove Clown Make-Up During Citizenship Ceremonies

NDP Hires Richard Dreyfuss to Pretend to Be Jack Layton for the Next 4 Years

David Suzuki and Al Gore Say "Fuck It" and Go On Pollution Spree

Peter MacKay Busted Taking a Tank to 7-11

Gatorade To Sponsor Water Boarding on FOX Reality Series

Vancouver Just Forgets to Vote for Mayor

Rick Perry to Not Speak for Remainder of Presidential Campaign

Tories Staff E.I. With Cyberdyne Systems Model T-101 Case Workers

God to U.S. Congress; "I Don't Like You, OKAY?! Can't You Take a Hint?!"

Herman Cain: A Gentleman Does Not Sexually Harrass, Fire, Settle Out of Court and Tell"

“Occupy My Couch" Movement Continues to Outnumber Occupy Vancouver

Vancouver To Solidify Douchebag Image With Law Requiring Cats On Leashes

Canada Commemorates St Patrick's Day By Making Abortion Illegal For 24 Hours

Archive