A leak from the offices of Her Majesty’s Attorney General has revealed an obscure clause in Theresa May’s Withdrawal Agreement with the EU that would require the return of a large part of the UK Royal Family to Germany, should the deal be rejected by parliament.

The House of Hanover was first sent to the UK on a long-term loan in 1714, a spokesman for the Brunswick-Lüneburg explained: ‘It was clearly understood at the time that the loan of the House of Hanover to the UK was a backstop measure, until the UK could establish a free monarchy of its own. Over the centuries, the ‘royal loan’ was inherited by Germany, and now it is enshrined in EU law.’

‘Every so often, Germany has taken the trouble to enrich the British Royals with some fresh German blood. On return to Germany, the House of Windsor name will be dropped and the Royal family will return to their true names as the House of Saxe-Coburg-Gotha. But the UK needn’t worry about losing its much-loved monarchy. We have decided that we are more than happy to leave in the UK all the royals who are more than sixth in line to the throne, so it’ll be long live King Andrew and the Duchess of York! So, who said no deal was a bad deal?”