This post is regarding a conversation I’m having with an acquaintance, I don’t personally know this person. But I know that, this is blue pilled male from South India and our conversation started over the internet. Hence forth, This person will be called Mr. P.

We somehow started talking about my views on marriage and shared with him the post I made on why men should not get married. (Self Plug)

This was his reply:

I have edited the texts a bit for reading convenience, obvious grammar and spelling mistakes.

Mr. P:

I want to get straight to the point. I know that male bashing is something that goes under the drain but I never thought it could be something this massive, thank you for that. Your points about responsibilities laid upon a male is very thought provoking but there were some points which piqued my interest.

I’m not sure it’s because that this is something new, I’m hearing about or something completely wrong. I know that we are striving towards equality and women’s rights, but the points which you mentioned are some which were the foundation of male dominance over the world.

A man has been responsible for his family and women were dependent on father or her husband. That’s true, yet this was because they were considered as objects and something lower to them. Let’s consider this. What’s the outlook of future of parents in the case of boy and a girl? The investment laid upon the future of boy is more because he is going to take care of them but it’s vice-versa in the girl as the responsibility is only till, she gets married. This can be a problem for a guy as well as girl. So, one can take the blame for it as well as responsibility. Well, this is just my opinion.

Desi Red Pill:

I understand the roles of male and female have been such that put men into more dominating positions. We have considered women objects for any centuries, but that role has definitely changed drastically in the 21st century. Women have more social importance than men in general now. They are getting put into power, getting quotas in government offices and universities. They have more rights under the law.

If you ever get divorced in India you are fucked, literally and financially. You’ ll have to pay alimony for a lifetime if you were her only source of income, if you had kids, more child support. She can put a fake domestic violence case on you, then, no court will take your side.

Most rape cases in India are falsely registered, promising marriage and having sex is considered rape. If you touch a woman by mistake, she can get you thrown in jail. I’m not against relationships, I believe men and women can live together well, but when you decide to include law into that equation, you will totally lose my support.

Therefore, I’m against marriage. And don’t even get me started on child custody cases.

Sure, (6) females had a disadvantage for centuries, but was that really a disadvantage? Men went to work, fought and died in wars, built most of the modern technologies you see, a little advantage can be given to men for their vision and hard work to make our self a better society, but in the 21st century being born as a female is a privilege that modern technology and information boom has given us and you can’t deny that fact.

Mr. P:

I understand the role reversal between men and women is happening but I wouldn’t agree that it is acting drastically. Most of the issues which you talk happen mostly in the urban centers of our country which isn’t actually much compared to our population. (1)

See my point is that I agree on the importance given to women but that’s how their living standards rise up and come to equality. If the dominant gender keeps on being dominant. How does the suppressed rise up? (2)

You talk about false rape cases being registered against men. Dude that’s very small per cent when compared to the actually number of rape cases. If you say women are being given importance why the heck did it take more than 8 years to give out a judgement even for this level of monstrosity. (3)

Do you know how many cases go unregistered just because the women didn’t drag her dignity to the streets? You touch a woman by mistake she can drag you to jail. She has the power because she has been suppressed so bad that she needs that power to overcome. (4)

Marriage isn’t bringing the government into the deal. It is mainly joining two families. I would say that we aren’t that forward in society that two people living together can start a family. Man, we are still Indians who do honor killing if people go against their family in the marriages. (5)

“Sure, females had a disadvantage for centuries, but was that really a disadvantage?” Are you serious? Just because men got to work and do war and women get to be in home. That was a boon to them? They weren’t given a chance to think what they actually want to do. I mean they were slaves who gave kids and food and of course sex. (6)

After this last message from Mr. P, I realized that this conversation would be better suited as post on my blog as it will also help me answer any future queries of similar nature by showing them this post.

Hence forth is my response, I have responded to each paragraph to the corresponding number with them.

Desi Red Pill:

1. Just because the issues that affect men happen only in the urban centers of India, makes it a less important issue? The urban population in India is about 30% of the Indian population. You don’t think about 1/3 of the Indian population is a large number?

That’s like saying the Jewish holocaust wasn’t a crime against humanity because it only effected about 0.66 percent of the human population at that time. (Source: https://encyclopedia.ushmm.org/content/en/article/documenting-numbers-of-victims-of-the-holocaust-and-nazi-persecution) The number of victims effected due to a crime/ injustice isn’t an argument against the importance of the crime.

“Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere.” Martin Luther King Jr.

2. “How does the suppressed rise up?” The answer is simple. By giving both genders equal rights, not by unfairly suppressing one. Suppressing one group to give advantage to another is literally the dictionary definition for discrimination.

In the current scenario, Men have no legal recourse in the face of a divorce. I don’t believe anyone would say “this is a fair system” if they saw the hoops, men have to go through to get a fair divorce trial.

3. Again, does the fact that this is a small percentage, make the injustice less important? How is this even an arguing point?

I understand that the delay on the part of the Nirbhaya case is abhorrent and no parent should go through such hell. I’m in no way in support of the rapists or the people who tried to fight for them all these years. In my opinion, all rape cases where the culprits have been convicted, should be ruled with strict and swift action.

At least, those men were arrested and tried for their crimes, if a man goes to the police with a case of rape or domestic violence he is laughed back home by the police. The police don’t even register male on male or female on male rape cases. The social anguish for a man to admit he is raped is just as much as a woman to admit she was raped.

Men suppress their assault because they fail to accept their lost sense of manliness. No person can disagree that male children from birth have been taught to suppress their emotions and this has done a great disservice to men as a social creature. Male victims voice their concern in reconciling their masculine identity with their experience of being raped. But I digress.

4. “Do you know how many cases go unregistered just because the women didn’t drag her dignity to the streets? ”

I understand the number of women that don’t come out with their assault story may be estimated to be a large number looking at the population of India. But, the way to get them to open up about their assault is to teach them to be more open about these stuffs. Not by giving them power to ruin a man’s on a whim.

53 % of rape cases registered are revealed to be fake rape cases (Source: https://www.bbc.com/news/magazine-38796457) and these cases aren’t even registered under defamation. You ruin a person’s social status, his way of life, his job and after all of that, a women is let go with a pat on her back. Justice, right?

5. I realize in every contract; we need a moderating party that makes sure that both families have equal representation in case of a conflict.

But, both parties don’t have equal representation, the female’s family has far more power – anti-dowry, domestic violence are cases routinely clubbed with divorce in order to extort and scare the husband’s family into submission.

That is what needs to change in society and until men start getting equal representation under the law, I don’t find the juice worth the squeeze.

6. You think any person would like to go to war? Self-preservation is the first priority for any individual. Be it male or female. But, the socio-political climate of that era was such that men were expected to draft for wars and even forced into it. Even at that era, we saw it valuable to keep women away from wars and despair as they were considered the primary child bearers of the society and would guarantee the continuation of their progeny.

Throughout most of history, women have added more to the human gene pool than men (Source: https://www.theguardian.com/science/2014/sep/24/women-men-dna-human-gene-pool ) More women have survived and continue to survive because of the view that woman are essential for progress of human life.

“Sure, females had a disadvantage for centuries, but was that really a disadvantage?”

Maybe my statement was a little crude and rudimentary – Yes, it was a disadvantage, woman weren’t given the same rights as men. But both genders have had their fair share of disadvantages.

Every species’ primary goal is to ensure the survival of it’s species, providing sex and kids is part of our genetic code, as it is to protect and foster the offspring.