Let's have a look at the glaring inconsistencies between the sexes. George Clooney is 52, unmarried and childless. Yet when his relationships end it's always the woman's loss. That rascal George is ''too hard to pin down'' (grrrr), a ''playboy bachelor'' (women are ''spinsters'') and remains ''a great catch'' (grrrr again). Yet headlines, bloggers, feedback streams, radio talkback and TV this week painted Kylie's breakup as all her pain. Velencoso's life doesn't seem to be over. No one has mentioned his loss, heartache or, as one headline suggested for Kylie, ''agony''. What does hurt is this attitude. Because it is bull. It's boorish and boring; small-minded and sanctimonious. But it's also common. Frustratingly so. In my journalism career I can't recall being briefed to ask a male celebrity about the pressure of a ticking biological clock, or ageing, plastic surgery confessions or weight loss. But the girls cop this all the time. Come back from an interview with Kylie or that other one-time poster girl for the single, lonely and desperate, Jennifer Aniston, without asking the babies-and-marriage questions and you may as well resign and save an arse kicking. It appears we women are still pushed to follow the stereotypical path to fulfilment: marriage, babies and the happily-ever-after myth. That no partner means missing out in life. That no one chooses to be alone. That being single means sexless. That it takes two to make a whole.

Times have changed, but attitudes are slow to catch up. One in three Australian marriages ends in divorce today - and the figure is rising. Single-person households are the fastest growing demographic, and the proportion of adults living with a partner is steadily declining. Just about everyone has single or childless people in their lives. Surely they aren't all miserable? Maybe some don't see it as a blight but an opportunity. And what is single anyway? Friendless? Not my experience. Alone? Maybe when they choose to be. Sexless? Not if it can be helped. The reality is that many find the independence, freedom and spontaneity of a less encumbered life preferable to ticking boxes. There is no rigid timetable or checklist for happiness. Men are right to complain that they cop ''settle down'' pressures too. I sympathise, empathise and urge a unanimous ''back off bozos'', or at least a loud ''please mind your own business'' from the brotherhood. But it's not easy to speak out, I know. There are not a lot of response options to thoughtless remarks aimed at the single. Propriety doesn't allow the confessing that a coupled friend's life would be another's idea of death. It's awkward to challenge the appeal of kids, marriage, monogamy and mortgage. Singles aren't allowed to tap non-singles on the shoulder and whisper, ''I reckon I'm as happy as you are, if not more.''

Nope, I'm not feeling sorry for sad, pathetic Kylie. I'm sure she's hurting, and there's a cold vino in my fridge for her if she ever needs some sisterly solace (no babysitter required here), but the rude supposition has to stop. It is arrogant, ignorant and mostly plain wrong. Kylie is beautiful, talented, successful, wealthy, driven, ambitious, fit, healthy and a much-loved woman in her prime. And have you seen her bum? I've interviewed Kylie several times and only ever saw an evolved and thoughtful women who understands nothing in life is a given. Who is grateful for all she has. In her case, her very life. Let's not forget Kylie suffered breast cancer in 2005 and had surgery and chemotherapy. Receiving a second chance at life tends to make a glass forever half-full. It's no longer about what you don't have, but all the wonders you do. I don't want to speak for Kylie, but will anyway. Shit happens. Life's not all happily ever after. For anyone. Some love has an expiry date, some is forever. Whether the former or the latter, none is a failure. It's just what it is - or was. A place, a time, a gift and a lesson. Next!

Saturday Age columnist Wendy Squires is a journalist, editor and author. Twitter: @Wendy_Squires