The show had to go on.

On the eve of Glee‘s tribute episode to Finn Hudson (Thursday at 9/8c on Fox), Lea Michele reveals in her first interview following the death of boyfriend and co-star Cory Monteith why returning to work after the tragedy was the only feasible option.

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Although the actress acknowledges to TV Week Australia, “For me personally, I’ve lost two people: Cory and Finn,” she adds, “We had a beautiful memorial for Cory in the auditorium and some of the cast members sang and people spoke about him. It only felt right that we would do the same thing for Finn, so I felt it was very therapeutic.

“Everyone is asking: ‘Is it hard to do this? Is it hard to be back at work?’, but the truth is it’s no harder at work than it is in life,” she continues, “so we might as well all be together as a family supporting each other to get through this together.”

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Michele says she never took her time with Monteith for granted. “I woke up every single day feeling like I was in some sort of spell or something, that I was lucky enough to have him in my life,” she shares. “There was no greater man than Cory, so for the time we spent together, I consider myself very lucky.”