invocation of my guardian angel in six sexts

i. angel of god, deliver me to the doorstep of your wilderness. lead me into temptation. teach me everything you think there is to know about thirst and i will teach you what i can about ecstasy. offer me neither a kingdom nor a temple but sacrilege: all the dirty things you would do if you were here. bury your sins in me the way you know i like to be fucked.

ii. how hot is the fire under the flesh? what face do you make when you come? is it the same one jesus had before his corpse leaked enough water for the nearest man to guzzle and become a believer? did you know that the line between pain and pleasure is as thin as the one between forgive me father for i have sinned and punish me daddy i’ve been very bad?

iii. wouldn’t you like to see me on my knees before you, lips wrapped around your name in prayer? you can use my grandmother’s rosary to bind my wrists to a ruined statue of an archangel in some back alley church and take me pressed against the hilt of his sword. i promise you, no one is watching. not even god.

iv. o wicked angel, what a mess your holy wars have made of the sky. what a garden you have made of me, what an agony. my pussy weeps for you. i call for you at night with legs spread wide as your wings, wondering what it would feel like to be pounded until i am a moon sheet of host you can tuck under your tongue for later when you are hungry again.

v. let me learn my nakedness in yours. let me baptise you in the river between my thighs. the games we play, three denials of the cock: you get a kick out of making me beg and in my hubris i cannot help but do the same. not that i mind —i went to sunday school for a year to learn my unworthiness before i earned the right to taste a body willingly given.

vi. eve took the fruit and i the seed of the serpent. meet me on the other side of the confessional and tell me you want this. i am a trespasser making myself known to a transgressor. maybe that’s how we know that there is still something immaculate to be forgiven in each other, and where to find what little of it is left just to see it ruined.