THE English Defence League has quit campaigning and returned to its roots as a carp fishing syndicate.

Following a demonstration in Birmingham that just resulted in everyone taking the piss out of it, the EDL has rented a depressing man-made lake in a disused quarry and stocked it with tired old carp.

A spokesman said: “We met through the carp fishing scene, back when we were just a group of self-hating men drinking warm beer in fold-up chairs.

“It was fucking miserable and soon we were looking for someone to blame for our shit lives. That’s kind of how the EDL started.

“We thought it would make people think we were hard, to respect and fear us. To be honest though, it’s been an utterly miserable experience.

“So it’s back to the fishing – catch carp, look at carp, put carp back. It’s the best we can hope for.”

He added: “We’re still called the EDL but now it stands for Everyweek Down Lakeside.”