INT. SHIBUYA - AFTERNOON

Blank Phantom thief JOKER AKIRA KURUSU is arguing with careless Phantom theif PANTHER ANN TAKAMAKI. AKIRA tries to hug ANN but he shakes him off.

AKIRA

Please Ann, don't leave me.

ANN

I'm sorry Akira, but I'm looking for somebody a bit more brave. Somebody who faces his fears head on, instead of running away.

AKIRA

I am such a person!

ANN frowns.

ANN

I'm sorry, Akira. I just don't feel excited by this relationship anymore.

ANN leaves.

AKIRA sits down, looking defeated.

Moments later, kind Phantom theif SKULL RYUJI SAKAMOTO barges in looking flustered.

AKIRA

Goodness, Ryuji! Is everything okay?

RYUJI

I'm afraid not.

AKIRA

What is it? Don't keep me in suspense...

RYUJI

It's ... a shadow ... I saw an evil shadow kill a bunch of The public!

AKIRA

Defenseless The public?

RYUJI

Yes, defenseless The public!

AKIRA

Bloomin' heck, Ryuji! We've got to do something.

RYUJI

I agree, but I wouldn't know where to start.

AKIRA

You can start by telling me where this happened.

RYUJI

I was...

RYUJI fans himself and begins to wheeze.

AKIRA

Focus Ryuji, focus! Where did it happen?

RYUJI

Mementos! That's right - Mementos!

AKIRA springs up and begins to run.

EXT. A ROAD - CONTINUOUS

AKIRA rushes along the street, followed by RYUJI. They take a short cut through some back gardens, jumping fences along the way.

INT. MEMENTOS - SHORTLY AFTER

GORO AKECHI a backstabbing shadow terrorises two The public.

AKIRA, closely followed by RYUJI, rushes towards GORO, but suddenly stops in his tracks.

RYUJI

What is is? What's the matter?

AKIRA

That's not just any old shadow, that's Goro Akechi!

RYUJI

Who's Goro Akechi?

AKIRA

Who's Goro Akechi? Who's Goro Akechi? Only the most backstabbing shadow in the universe!

RYUJI

Blinkin' knickers, Akira! We're going to need some help if we're going to stop the most backstabbing shadow in the universe!

AKIRA

You can say that again.

RYUJI

Blinkin' knickers, Akira! We're going to need some help if we're going to stop the most backstabbing shadow in the universe!

AKIRA

I'm going to need gun, lots of gun.

Goro turns and sees Akira and Ryuji. He grins an evil grin.

GORO

Akira Kurusu, we meet again.

RYUJI

You've met?

AKIRA

Yes. It was a long, long time ago...

EXT. A PARK - BACK IN TIME

A young AKIRA is sitting in a park listening to some jazz music, when suddenly a dark shadow casts over him.

He looks up and sees GORO. He takes off his headphones.

GORO

Would you like some curry?

AKIRA's eyes light up, but then he studies GORO more closely, and looks uneasy.

AKIRA

I don't know, you look kind of backstabbing.

GORO

Me? No. I'm not backstabbing. I'm the least backstabbing shadow in the world.

AKIRA

Wait, you're a shadow?

AKIRA runs away, screaming.

INT. MEMENTOS - PRESENT DAY

GORO

You were a coward then, and you are a coward now.

RYUJI

(To AKIRA) You ran away?

AKIRA

(To RYUJI) I was a young child. What was I supposed to do?

AKIRA turns to GORO.

AKIRA

I may have run away from you then, but I won't run away this time!

AKIRA runs away.

He turns back and shouts.

AKIRA

I mean, I am running away, but I'll be back - with gun.

GORO

I'm not scared of you.

AKIRA

You should be.

INT. PALACE - LATER THAT DAY

AKIRA and RYUJI walk around searching for something.

AKIRA

I feel sure I left my gun somewhere around here.

RYUJI

Are you sure? It does seem like an odd place to keep deadly gun.

AKIRA

You know nothing Ryuji Sakamoto.

RYUJI

We've been searching for ages. I really don't think they're here.

Suddenly, GORO appears, holding a pair of gun.

GORO

Looking for something?

RYUJI

Crikey, Akira, he's got your gun.

AKIRA

Tell me something I don't already know!

RYUJI

The earth's circumference at the equator is about 40,075 km.

AKIRA

I know that already!

RYUJI

I really hate Akechi.

GORO

(appalled) Dude!

While GORO is looking at RYUJI with disgust, AKIRA lunges forward and grabs his deadly gun. He wields them, triumphantly.

AKIRA

Prepare to die, you backstabbing greens!

GORO

No please! All I did was kill a bunch of The public!

ANN enters, unseen by any of the others.

AKIRA

I cannot tolerate that kind of behaviour! Those The public were defenceless! Well now they have a defender - and that's me! Akira Kurusu defender of innocent The public.

GORO

Don't hurt me! Please!

AKIRA

Give me one good reason why I shouldn't use these gun on you right away!

GORO

Because Akira, I am your father.

AKIRA looks stunned for a few moments, but then collects himself.

AKIRA

No you're not!

GORO

Ah well, it had to be worth a try.

GORO tries to grab the gun but AKIRA dodges out of the way.

AKIRA

Who's the daddy now? Huh? Huh?

Unexpectedly, GORO slumps to the ground.

RYUJI

Did he just faint?

AKIRA

I think so. Well that's disappointing. I was rather hoping for a more dramatic conclusion, involving my deadly gun.

AKIRA crouches over GORO's body.

RYUJI

Be careful, Akira. It could be a trick.

AKIRA

No, it's not a trick. It appears that... It would seem... Goro Akechi is dead!

AKIRA

What?

AKIRA

Yes, it appears that I scared him to death.

RYUJI claps his hands.

RYUJI

So your gun did save the day, after all.

ANN steps forward.

ANN

Is it true? Did you kill the backstabbing shadow?

AKIRA

Ann how long have you been...?

ANN puts his arm around AKIRA.

ANN

Long enough.

AKIRA

Then you saw it for yourself. I killed Goro Akechi.

ANN

Then the The public are safe?

AKIRA

It does seem that way!

A crowd of vulnerable The public enter, looking relived.

ANN

You are their hero.

The The public bow to AKIRA.

AKIRA

There is no need to bow to me. I seek no worship. The knowledge that Goro Akechi will never kill The public ever again, is enough for me.

ANN

You are humble as well as brave!

One of the The public passes AKIRA a valuable treaure

ANN

I think they want you to have it, as a symbol of their gratitude.

AKIRA

I couldn't possibly.

Pause.

AKIRA

Well, if you insist.

AKIRA takes the treaure.

AKIRA

Thank you.

The The public bow their heads once more, and leave.

AKIRA turns to ANN.

AKIRA

Does this mean you want me back?

ANN

Oh, Akira, of course I want you back!

AKIRA smiles for a few seconds, but then looks defiant.

AKIRA

Well you can't have me.

ANN

WHAT?

AKIRA

You had no faith in me. You had to see my scare a shadow to death before you would believe in me. I don't want a lover like that.

ANN

But...

AKIRA

Please leave. I want to spend time with the one person who stayed with me through thick and thin - my best friend, Ryuji.

RYUJI grins.

ANN

But...

RYUJI

You heard the gentleman. Now be off with you. Skidaddle! Shoo!

ANN

Akira?

AKIRA

I'm sorry Ann, but I think you should skidaddle.

ANN leaves.

RYUJI turns to AKIRA.

RYUJI

Did you mean that? You know ... that I'm your best friend?

AKIRA

Of course you are!

The two walk off arm in arm.

Suddenly RYUJI stops.

RYUJI

When I said I really hate Akechi, you know I was just trying to distract the shadow don't you?

THE END