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What’s the point of winter without icicles from your eyebrows?

Fortunately, as the folks out West say more and more these days, “we have government in Ottawa that cares.” They are all onside with Ottawa’s great crusade against unseasonable warmth. In Alberta they are especially thankful. Ex-premier Rachel Notley and PM Justin Trudeau brought the carbon tax here early, and this year we get the benefits. We see now that jacking up the price of oil, gas and home fuel is the sure path to stronger, longer, colder and more bitter winters to our beloved province. No one now denies taxation has a direct link with temperature reduction. How could it ever have been doubted?

It’s at the heart of climate science — it is the E=mc2 of global warming physics — if you tax energy, people will get colder.

Well then, results are in. These days the stalwart folks of Regina are rejoicing in a flurry of “extreme cold warnings” and if it wasn’t so frigid would be dancing in the streets over windchills that bring the temps to a manly, bracing -40 to -45 C.

Photo by Arleney Rodriguez De Sanchez/Reuters

Who can question that without the intervention of the carbon tax, the residents of that beautiful city would probably be sweltering right now in the low -30s. It’s been a boon in unforeseen ways. More than a few doughty travellers cancelled their annual vacation to Siberia (“where they have real winters”), saving them thousands of dollars in flights and hotels, because, thanks to the efficacy of the global warming tax “we can now enjoy the full winter delights of a Siberian winter right here in our home city. We’ve thrown out the Speak Russian in Six Days guidebooks.”