When people talk about high school heartthrobs named Jason, they're usually referring to an episode of "Beverly Hills 90210." (We still canNOT believe that Brandon didn't tell Dylan about he and Kelly. Like, what kind of friend is that? And then Kelly turned them BOTH down?!)

But in the mid-aughts at Glenbrook North High School outside of Chicago, a different Jason was big man on campus. Indians second baseman Jason Kipnis found his business out in the open thanks to a tweet from teammate Lonnie Chisenhall:

Balancing 12 sports and school had to be a sport in itself... #VarsityCheer? @TheJK_Kid @Indians - Lonnie Chisenhall (@BIGLON8) January 14, 2015

He forgot "#swoon."

Seriously, there are major Division I NCAA athletic programs with fewer men's sports available. If they only knew that he'd grow up to rip his pants on television and fall victim to a prank played by an upperclassman, maybe they wouldn't consider him such a hot shot.

Secrets don't stay secrets forever in high school, so it wasn't long before Kipnis caught wind of what was going on:

@Indians @BIGLON8 They added them all up throughout the years! 3 sports X 4 years = 12 sport athlete! - Jason Kipnis (@TheJK_Kid) January 14, 2015

At least he's being a good sport about it. (See what we did there?)