When not offering insightful commentary on Yahoo! News, well-meaning moron Ken M often reaches out to brands on Facebook for advice and human-like companionship. We’ve collected some of his greatest hits, and a few ROTW exclusives:

I Wish I Were Ken M’s Grandchild

Ken M Is A Student Of Life

His Grandparenting Style Is Harsh, But Fair

Freedom Isn’t Free, But Donuts Sometimes Are

It’s All About Science Facts, Not Science Fictions

Safety First!

Why Else Would They Get So Big?

It’s An Easy Mistake To Make

Poor Poor Social Media Intern, You Have To Admire The Effort

I’d Be First In Line At Chunky Cheese

Ken Helps People Become Ideal Marketing Targets