I haven't looked at myself much this year. I don't in general. My wife's Greek relations say I've got nice apple cheeks, and I think I've got blue eyes and brown hair. I looked at my teeth two months ago and they were 50% black at the bottom. It was bad. The dentist was a genius. He sorted it out for a couple of hundred quid. Now they are yellow like my top ones. The bottom ones are my own, the top ones aren't – they were knocked out.

The way I look has stood me in good stead: I can clear bars with a look, and people still cross the road in town. I am 55, but I like getting older. I formed the Fall when I was 18, so we were always trying to look older than we were to get work. I don't think a lot of groups would have got very far with the style standards they have now; today, some idiot would be telling the Kinks what shoes to wear.

I am 6ft 1in, and I've always had a bit of a stoop. I've got osteoporosis; it's in the family. A few years ago, I broke my right hip: it took months to recover. Then I was in hospital in Germany for something else and I broke my other hip going for a fag. I had to perform in a wheelchair. I have a steel plate in each now and I've stopped jumping on stage.

I only really look in a mirror before I go on stage, in case I've got anything on my face. I've got a comb. It's good to look a bit straight: a clean shirt and all that. And I've started to wear underpants and I clean my teeth now and again. But that's about it.

• The Remainderer EP by The Fall is out now.