Tweet With Sarah Palin’s alleged breast implants news, to which she categorically denies to be true, I think in 2012 when the Republican maverick decides whether or not she will run for the presidency, should consider this as her platform: Palin’s boobs - A firm position for this country.



Palin’s breasts have received more attention than anything she’s ever said, including her author neighbor moving in next door to write a book. In an interview with Greta Van Sustren the two talked about Palin’s figure, with Palin saying, “To be judged on or to be talked about on appearance — say chest size — it makes me wear layers, it makes me have to waste time figuring out what am I going to wear so that nobody will look at an area that I don’t need them to look at.”



People look at the “area,” meaning her breasts because they are tired of the lunacy that comes out of her mouth. Palin has a great opportunity to win the nomination, but she has to flaunt it up a bit, speak less and change parties. And change her name to something like a Bond villain, say Nipply Dollars.



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Jason Tanamor is the Editor of Zoiks! Online. He is also the author of the novels, "Hello Lesbian!" and "Anonymous." Email Jason at jason@zoiksonline.com .