

(click here to view raw shot)

I often go back and read My Reflection post from this past June because it kind of brings me back to reality. I admit to getting into these moods every once in a while where I start thinking too much and comparing my real body to Berry’s body. Sometimes I really do feel this fantasy sl avatar, with perfect hair, skin, curves, etc… contributes negatively to how I view my real self. Then I read that post and all the comments from people and realize how silly I’m being. But I wonder if the time I spend in this virtual world and all of my feelings towards my real and sl avatar affects how much I progress in life. I wonder if it keeps me from doing certain things or accomplishing certain goals.

As you can see, my mind likes to wander in all sorts of places, without any valid reason. I figured since I’m in one of those introspective moods that today’s Monday Meme should also reflect that. So this week’s meme is all about introspection, the examination of one’s own thoughts, impressions, feelings and sensations. A self-examination of sort, so yeah, it’s a heavy one. I hope you guys decide to do it, I think it’s definitely a good exercise for the mind.

Meme instructions: Answer the following questions and don’t forget to leave a link to your post in the comments.

Regardless of your current number, how old do you actually feel? – I am 33 years old and for about the past decade I have continuously felt I wasn’t a day over 21. Possibly because I am the baby of the family and have always been treated such, even till this day. But in the past year or so, I have started to feel older, more my age. Life experiences and going through life changing events has really affected the way I view the world and myself in it. Which is worse, failing or never trying? – Never trying. This is something that I try to teach my students as well, it doesn’t matter even if you fail, just trying alone gives you so much experience and knowledge itself. If the average human life span was 40 years, how would you live your life differently? – That would only give me about 7 more years. I would definitely travel more. Are you more worried about doing things right, or doing the right things? – That’s a tough one. I have been taught to always do the right thing and that’s what I usually strive for. However, because of my perfectionist nature, I also try and do things right, especially when it comes to other people and their feelings, but there is a limit. I still wouldn’t do it if I felt that it wasn’t the morally right thing to do. I have no idea if what I said just made any sense. Would you rather be a worried genius or a joyful simpleton? – Definitely joyful simpleton, pretty much what I am now. When I do get into those worrisome moods, I loathe it. Have you been the kind of friend you want as a friend? – I regretfully admit that I am not a really great friend. I tend to live in my own little world and don’t really reach out to people often, in either life. I keep to myself. You really have to message or text me in order to get my attention or get me to respond. I rarely reach out to others myself. I know this about myself and I have lost friends over it. Luckily, in real life, I have a best friend as well as a boyfriend that understand how I am and give me space when I need it or chase after me when they need me. I am however always there when asked to do anything, but I need that push for sure. Which I realize kind of makes me a sucky friend/person. I am trying to work on that. Do you remember that time 5 years ago when you were extremely upset? Does it really matter now? – I actually don’t remember that time 5 years ago when I was extremely upset so obviously it really didn’t matter to me at all. Maybe it did then, but definitely not now. Kind of makes me think about all the things that upset me in the past year or so and how much they really matter to me. At what time in your recent past have you felt most passionate and alive? – When I passed a very important exam and got a promotion at work a couple of months ago. It really made me feel like I accomplished a lot and gave me reason to work harder and strive for more. Also made me love my work even more. If you just won a million dollars, would you quit your job? – I’m what you call a “trust fund baby” and I’ve realized that money really doesn’t make me happy. It can buy pretty things but when you do something that you absolutely love that makes you feel like you are really contributing to this world, than nothing can make you feel more satisfied with yourself. Also, there is something about money that you earn yourself through your own hard work that makes it even more valuable to you. Second Life has contributed to this feeling I have towards money as well, since I have never invested real dollars into the game. Everything I have in SL, I’ve earned myself through hard work. If you knew that everyone you know was going to die tomorrow, who would you visit today? – There is no way that I could answer this with just one person. There are so many people that I would: family, friends, and of course a couple of very good sl friends. What do you feel is the difference between being alive and truly living? – To me, being alive is waking up and going through your day and doing all of your mundane tasks miserably without feeling inspired or enlightened. Truly living is waking up and doing things that make you happy, and leave you feeling satisfied, inspired and enlightened, like you are adding positive energy and value to this world. Also love…loving all the people in your world, your surroundings and everything you do. If we learn from our mistakes, why are we always so afraid to make a mistake? – Making a mistake can leave you feeling deflated, powerless and miserable. Of course no one really looks forward to that but in the end I think it teaches us more and prepares us better for the future. What would you do differently if you knew nobody would judge you? – In RL, there are certain things I don’t do because of social pressures. However, I’ve kind of let go of that feeling of “what would people think” when it comes to doing or saying things, online or in SL. In SL, I do as a I please now and if someone is judging me for doing something in this virtual world, I just ignore them and pretend that they don’t exist. I’ve gotten really good at that. If you could offer a newborn child only one piece of advice, what would it be? – Don’t swallow jewelry.

Finally, no introspection meme can be complete without Introspective Pug!



Please remember that you can participate in any of the memes/challenges at any time. You’ll find them all under my Blog Challenges category along with other memes and challenges I’ve done over the years.

Credits:

*Skin: Glam Affair – Cleo – America – 05 C by Aida Ewing

Hair: [LeLutka]-POCAHONTAS hair – BlondeFun by Thora Charron

Dress: Les Petits Détails – Atena Dress White (MESH – Size S) by Nevery Lorakeet

Feet+Ribbons: -Glam Affair – Vanity Feet – Ballerina – S by M4ri1yn Magic (@ Shoetopia)

Jewelry: Eshi Otawara Pearl Headdress (silver/white pearl) by Eshi Otawara

*Mesh Hands: Slink Avatar Enhancement Hands – Relaxed by Siddean Munro

*Pose: Di’s Opera by Di Hoorenbeek

Location: Komorebi

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