No one quite knows how Fox's Utopia, in which 15 people are placed in isolation for a year and asked to build a new society, will play out. With its untested format and Truman Show-level of cast surveillance — there are 129 hidden and unhidden cameras on the compound and footage will live stream 24/7 here — anything seems possible. Especially since producers cast wildcard characters: a pastor, a pregnant woman, a "goddamn patriot," a "backwoods hillbilly." (They are still casting, by the way; new Utopians will cycle in as others cycle out.)

Cosmpolitan.com spoke to the polyamorous belly dancer of the group, 26-year-old Dedeker Winston, before she shipped out to the Southern California Utopia set last week. Note: Footage from the compound is already streaming, but the show, which will air twice a week on Tuesdays and Fridays, premieres Sunday, September 7.

You leave to start this adventure tomorrow morning — how are you feeling?

It's a total mix of emotions. I'm just trying to ride the wave. It's really intriguing to me, the opportunity to throw out everything that we know about society as it is, and get this fresh start by going back to living in these small groups. Getting to actually experience that firsthand is an intellectual turn-on for me.

What was the response from your family and friends like when you told them you'd be away for up to a year?

Generally positive — there was lots of encouragement for me to go and get in there and not hold anything back and see what I can do. There was some pain there too. It was extremely difficult for me to walk away from not only my family, but also my [polyamorous] relationships. They're relationships that I've spent a lot of time and emotional energy crafting, and having to step away from that is really hard. At the same time, I trust the people that I love will be there when I get back.

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How much contact with the outside world will you have while you're in Utopia?

Not enough! I only know a little bit about what my restrictions are, but I think it's going to be limited to one physical, face-to-face visit in the entire time that I'm there. That's something that I'm still coming to terms with. I think I'll have some limited contact via letters.

It's kind of like summer camp on steroids then.

Exactly. The people at home though, they're in this weird position of getting to watch me and to see what my life is like, but it's completely a unilateral, one-sided experience.

Are you allowed to bring things from home? What are you taking with you?

So much stuff. Really, it boiled down more to what we've been told not to bring. No TVs or smartphones or computers. No cash. We can't bring books either. So for me, outside of clothing and camping supplies and food, it's a lot of personal things. I've brought some statuary that reflects my own spirituality, as well as prayer beads and things like that.

What are the biggest assets you'll bring to the community?

I think I'll end up being the social mediator. In my life currently, in managing multiple relationships, you have to have good communication skills. It's imperative that you're able to communicate effectively and nonviolently. That's a huge asset when it comes to having to manage 15 radically different people.

What are some of your biggest fears around that group of people?

What I'd be afraid of is that someone looks at me as the hippie, the weird poly girl, and thinks that I'm engaged in some sort of kinky sex thing and that they end up writing me off as that.

Speaking of the polyamory, how did that come into your life?

Oh, gosh, if I'm going to delve into the origin story, that could take a really long time. About five years ago is when it all started. I'd been in pretty much monogamous relationships up to that point. I never cheated, but that was basically just a product of circumstance. I would've if I'd had the opportunity! I was really depressed and came to the conclusion that I'm messed up and there's something wrong with me.



But I started to explore and do some research. I started looking at people who were in open relationships, and that's when I came across the term polyamory. I got introduced to this whole culture that I had no idea existed — people who had multiple deep, emotional, romantic relationships in a healthy, well-adjusted, high-functioning way. I'd thought anyone who was in an open relationship was a sex addict or just wanted to sleep around or couldn't commit to anything.

I had no idea that you could combine something that was not sexually exclusive with romantic love. The first time I tried it with someone, it was horrible, because neither of us knew what we were doing. But even though it was horrible, I knew that this is the way I needed to live my life. This is who I am. After that rough learning process, then it was just "sky's the limit." I've been happier, I've felt more love, more trust, more security, and I've gotten more affection in the past four years of doing this than I ever had in any of my monogamous relationships.

How do you think being a polyamorous person will actually play out for you in Utopia? Would you initiate a new relationship?

It's not a situation where I have one relationship back at home and have to abstain from new relationships because of that, of course. I'm free to explore and to add more energy into my life — I've been encouraged to do that. As far as when I actually get there, I would love to initiate relationships if the chemistry and compatibility are there. I'm going to look to structure my romantic life the same way it is back home. Just because I'm in a new situation, it doesn't mean I'm going to change my personal priorities for love or intimacy. Hopefully the circumstances will facilitate that. Hopefully there are people there who already have an interest in this, or who are looking to explore and engage with it.

Is polyamory for everyone, in your opinion?

Well, just because I'm polyamorous doesn't mean I don't believe in monogamy. I don't think it's inherently inferior. If you really think you're monogamous and it works for you and it makes other people happy, then yes, please, good god, do it. If that brings love into the world, please do it. But if you're monogamous and you're bad at it, or you think monogamy is the only right way to live, that's when it becomes a little questionable to me.



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Lauren Hoffman Lauren Hoffman writes about television, women in pop culture, and her feelings.

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