WASHINGTON—Claiming that the publication of such a brief, tantalizing bit of audio was a breach of their journalistic responsibility, a furious Stephen Miller told reporters Tuesday that he was outraged at ProPublica for only releasing seven minutes of immigrant children sobbing. “It’s unacceptable that this so-called news organization saw fit to foist this total tease of a clip on the American public,” said Miller, who expressed frustration that the audio, in which 10 detained Central American children can be heard crying out for their parents, ended before reaching “the really good stuff.” “Sure, they’re wailing ‘Mami’ and ‘Papa’ so hard they can’t breathe, and I guess the part where that 6-year-old desperately rattles off her aunt’s phone number is kind of satisfying, but ultimately it only conveys a very small fraction of what we’re doing here. I’ve listened to this recording dozens and dozens of times in the past day, and it’s just simply nowhere near enough to scratch the itch. Shame on you, ProPublica.” Miller added that the one silver lining was the likelihood that other outlets would soon broadcast hours of comprehensive, high-quality footage of immigrant children being tormented.


This example of peerless reportage comes to you from Onion Social News. Onion Social News gives users access to the finest algorithmically-selected journalism, controlling what you see and when you see it for the betterment of humanity and beyond. To learn more, click here.