The other day, while wandering through my more morbid thoughts (and watching Dr. Oz’s episode on Women Who Kill) I got to wondering: Who is the biggest female serial killer of all time, and does her crimes compare to top-serial-dog? So, I did a little bit of research so that we can all be a little bit smarter today. Accept this as your Friday The 13th gift from me. I hope they run a Twilight Zone marathon on basic tv. Im not a fan of modern horror, but I love classic horror. Oh…and it must be specifically on basic tv because I have no cable 😦 Happy Friday the 13th! (It’s a faux-liday, fake holiday…like 420 but with more blood and paranoia…or maybe equal paranoia in some cases!)

Countess Erzebet Bathory is considered to be HBIC (Head Bitch In Charge) when it comes to serial killing, having more blood notches on her belt than any other female serialista (all which I believe deserve all the pain they dish out on others ten fold).

Erzebet lived from 1560 to 1614, and was an Hungarian countess of the well respected Bathory family. She is often called the “Blood Countess” because of the horrific slayings, which is really ironic because she was born into one of the most oldest/wealthiest families in Transylvania, which is legendary for vampire tales. She was famous for her supreme beauty, which is also kinda vampiristic.

Around the time of her husband’s death, when she was 40 years old and beauty was fleeting, Countess Erzebet and a posse of 4, including her lesbian lover (im feeling it), upped their ante on torturing and killing of young girls and virgins for their blood. Her husband did his fair share of torturing servants himself over the years of their marriage, even having taught her torture tactics he’d use/learn in war. It’s not clear if he knew how blood thirsty she was. Im pretty sure he did though. Unlike his wife, he wasn’t big on torturing them to death. I can’t decide which is worse, honestly.

Her victims were usually peasants that she would lure into the castle under the impression that they would be given a good job in the castle, or the children of the less noble whom were promised etiquette classes, kinda like a fatal version of signing a contract with P. Diddy. It all began when a servant got her angry and she lashed out, stabbing her with scissors. Erzebet said that the blood that got all over her face and hands made her skin feel more youthful. She thought it would help more to bathe in it, so she killed the girl, drained her blood and warmed the blood to bathe in. Which is exactly how Bad Boy Records got started too.

That’s when she became an extreme Femme Fatale. She’d torture her victims until she was ready to use them by cutting them with scissors, pricking them with pins, and impaling them on sharp spikes that hung from a cage on the ceiling, so that she could shower in their blood. Her victims were beaten beyond recognition, had fingers cut off, or drenched in buckets of cold water in the snow so that they would freeze to death. Even when she was sick, she’d have the young girls brought to her bed so she could bite the flesh from their faces and shoulders. She would burn the faces, crotches, and hands of victims, perform surgeries, sexually abuse them, behead them, starve them and give them needles. She would sew their lips together, forced them to eat their own flesh, cut them with razors, slitting the skin between their fingers, sticking hot pokers up their noses. She forced them to tear skin from their own skin and eat them. Some, she would fatten up because she believed this caused made more blood for her baths. She would behead, disfigure them, or bury them alive. She would have honey poured on them and tie them to a tree so that bugs could nibble and sting them. She tortured them for months sometimes.

Erzebet was super smart, fluent in a few languages, including Latin, Greek, and German and well versed in astronomy and sciences. It’s kinda interesting that most serial killers are usually geniuses using their powers for evil, instead of good…like real life super villains. Like a true villainette, she was hardcore into sorcery and black magic. Not witchcraft…some witches and witchcrafts are with good intent, unlike black magic. She was very vain, petty, and had a bad temper. She was in love with her black hair and really pale skin. I dont know…I seriously think this is where vampire stories come from. She had several male and female lovers. She once ran away with a lover who was rumored to drink blood, but she returned home and her husband forgave her.

People would complain about missing girls and screams coming from the castle, but no one took action for years because going against nobility could have you killed (things haven’t changed much I see). In 1610, Erzebet and posse of 4 were arrested after her servants disposed of 4 corpses in full view of the villagers, who reported it to King officials. The Countess thought that she would be untouchable because of her noble blood. Most laws protected people like her from prosecution. The King demanded a raid be performed by her cousin, a Count after hearing that she was kidnapping girls, and had maybe even killed some. During the raid, they found one girl dead in her main room (drained of blood), and another dying with holes pierced all over her body pale from being drained while alive (she was so near death that they knew she wouldn’t make it even if they tried). They found another dead girl chained to a pillar, burned, whipped, cut, and drained of blood. and others were locked away and a few were brutally beaten. More than 50 bodies were found below the castle. I bet the castle was smelly.

Her whole posse was found guilty and were to be treated as they treated their victims. 2 of them, both women, had all of their fingers torn out with red hot pincers and burned alive in a public execution. The 3rd woman was give leniency when a witness begged for mercy for her in exchange for testifying against the others. She was sentenced to life imprisonment. A 4th was only beheaded because he was a young man, but his body was drained of blood and burned after death. Countess Erzebet was sentenced to life solitary confinement. All of the windows were walled to her castle bedroom with only a tiny opening to receive food. Nobles were not to be executed, by law. I think they were too courteous to even offer her the comfort of her own bedroom. She was found dead in her cell in 1614, when a jailor wanted to take a peek to see if she was still as beautiful as he heard. Even while imprisoned, people raved about how she was still one of the most beautiful women. When he looked inside, she was laying face down, dead, with several plates of untouched food around her.

No one knows exactly how many were killed. 2 of her teammates claimed 36 and 37, while the other 2 said more than 50. Castle servants claimed 100-200, but legend has it that Erzebet kept a diary that listed all 650 of her victims. But the book is said to be kept under lock and key because of its gruesome details.

Creepy. Maybe she was a vampire…and died when she couldnt get her blood. Don’t all vamps keep diaries? She had a few children too, so she’s like a real live Serial Mom. I love that movie. It’s a lot funnier when it’s just a comedy.

More info on Female Serial Killers, according to wiki:

Female serial killers are rare. They tend to murder men for material gain, are usually emotionally close to their victims, and generally need to have a relationship with a person before killing them. “An analysis of 86 female serial killers from the U.S. found that the victims tended to be spouses, children or the elderly.” The methods they use for murder are covert or low-profile, such as murder by poison (the preferred choice for killing). They commit killings in specific places, such as their home or a health-care facility (where they then become known as “Angels of Mercy” by the media), or at different locations within the same city or state. Other methods used by female serial killers include shootings (used by 20%), suffocation (16%), stabbing (11%), and drowning (5%). Though most female serial killers murder for money or other such material gain (74% of them), others do it for attention. While many female serial killers have been diagnosed with Münchausen syndrome,[46] little research has been conducted focusing on the societal influences—particularly gender roles and expectations of women—which contribute to these women committing multiple murders. Each killer will have her own proclivities, needs and triggers, as specific reasons can only be obtained from the killer herself. “In a review of published literature on female serial murder, sexual or sadistic motives are believed to be extremely rare in female serial murderers, and psychopathic traits and histories of childhood abuse have been consistently reported in these women.”On rare occasions, women may be involved with a male serial killer as a part of a serial killing “team”.