It's always surprising how many of my clients have acquired sexual problems because of their religious beliefs or cultural backgrounds. Often they are completely unaware of it which is not surprising when people are taught confusing values from an early age.

It's difficult to grow into a healthy sexual being when you are told by religious parents, and/or church leaders that "God created sex to be something beautiful, and pure but should only be enjoyed in marriage" – and only between a man and a woman. And that you have to be a virgin, preferably having no sexual activity before marriage, no masturbation and definitely no homosexuality.

One of the most destructive emotions a person can experience is guilt. Credit:Getty

Almost all religious groups, over the ages, have condemned masturbation, claiming it inhibits self-control and promotes sexual promiscuity. The many myths and outdated beliefs surrounding masturbation remain hard to shake. For instance "do not masturbate because it leads to blindness, grows hair on the palms of your hand, it causes impotence later in life and premature ejaculation". The latest false claim is it leads to sex addiction.

One of the most destructive emotions a person can experience is guilt. It's not as if this guilt makes people abstain from forbidden sexual activity. No, it just makes them feel bad and depressed. Given these negative messages, it's not surprising that there are still feelings of shame and embarrassment about this very natural and healthy activity.