I write a 3-times-a-year column in ACM Queue Magazine. This issue I cover 2 unrelated topics. "How Sysadmins Devalue Themselves" and "And how to track on-call coverage". Enjoy!

Q: Dear Tom, How can I devalue my work? Lately I've felt like everyone appreciates me, and, in fact, I'm overpaid and underutilized. Could you help me devalue myself at work?

A: Dear Reader, Absolutely! I know what a pain it is to lug home those big paychecks. It's so distracting to have people constantly patting you on the back. Ouch! Plus, popularity leads to dates with famous musicians and movie stars. (Just ask someone like Taylor Swift or Leonardo DiCaprio.) Who wants that kind of distraction when there's a perfectly good video game to be played?

Here are some time-tested techniques that everyone should know.