I used to be an Archaeologist, but then I caught arthritis in the knees.

-Amye Lucius Lugo, Argivian Archaeologist

As a 33 years old graduate from Tolarian Academy, I resigned my functions to retire early from field research and adventure into magical places for an occupation more adapted to my condition. A professor at the academy kindly offered me a Feldon’s Cane. However, I categorically refused to hold it as it would make me look older than Rasputin Dreamweaver, the geriatric crook. I still have bright years ahead of me and, as so, I moved on and opened a cabinet of curiosities showcasing the sophisticated and marvelous artifacts I gathered during my short career. Nowadays, I take pleasure in explaining green mages entering the shop what these ancient artifacts can do and how to use them. These boys can’t think by themselves nowadays, noses buried in their newest edition of Jayemdae Tome, like it’s enclosing the answer to everything. But I bet I can still teach them a thing or two I learn the harsh way reading the cryptic Jalum Tome. Alas, no one cares about the lore of ancient struggles anymore. I myself used to be madly fascinated by it. Thinking about it makes me longing for the time I traveled the planes in search of remnants of an earlier and more powerful era, like that time I encountered a bunch of gentlemen on Rabiah looking for the lost monocle of Urza.

The lost treasure!

On the midsummer eve before leaving for the expedition, I revised my spellbook looking for spells I might have forgotten for my journey. As always, the first pages contained the usual Swords to Plowshares, Disenchants, a couple Divine Offerings and a lone Balance. Upon research I made in preparation prior to this enterprise, I had a hunch that I might as well fit unusual spells like Circle of Protection: Artifacts and blue along with the expected black and red also. I won’t trust no djinns and efreets found on this plane since it is well known that they are masters of trickery and misdirection. As for the artifacts, I grabbed the customary mana jewels, packed the intricate Ashnod’s Transmogrant and fueled some Trikes I reconstructed myself in a tedious science project restoration class in College of Lat-Nam. Finally, I decided that I should be accompanied by some Martyrs of Korlis; one cannot be too careful and someone has to carry that huge wooden crate containing the massive Ashnod’s device. Better be safe than sorry!

Library of Alexandria, a location forbidden to gentlemen

The sun was blazing relentlessly at its zenith in the cloudless sky, reflecting beams of light through tiny rhombus shaped stones upon my arrival in the desertic valley. I took some time to enjoy the marvelous sight of the far away pyramids, a beckoning promise of riches. I knew the heat would be overwhelming, but driven by the ecstasy of adventure, I pushed myself into motion without any further hesitation looking for clues leading to the hidden monocle. Not long after I started my research, I encountered an aggressive mage apparently looking for the same legendary artifact as me. Without any warning, he hastily summoned a Ball Lightning in my direction and invoked bolts and lightnings to seal the deal. I couldn’t do much this round being caught flat footed. I braced myself for the next round in which we exchanged a couple blows before I freed a tempestuous spirit from the bottle I stumbled upon earlier. To my own bewilderment, and fortunately for me, the djinn was obedient and my adversary failed to deal with him. On the decisive round, I resolved an early Circle of Protection: Red that bought me enough time to develop my position which ultimately helped me defeat my opponent.

A sight of my side of the battlefield at the end of the duel

After resting and having some water at a nearby oasis I shared with a group of desert nomads, I quickly resumed my trek and crossed the path of a rival wizard well known to me. I knew he was certainly on the same quest as me and, as an adversary not to underestimate, I took the initiative and I opened the hostilities right away. He didn’t do much early in the battle as I Disenchanted his Sylvan Library. Therefore, I took the opportunity to press a Mishra’s Factory at him a couple of times before it got struck by a Lightning Bolt. Later on, he started summoning big creatures; I instantly sent his Angel farming and wrecked an Ernie with Divine Offering thanks to the Ashnod’s Transmogrant. Meanwhile, I uncorked another bottle and the Djinn fought at my side for quite some time before taking it’s leave with a plow. With all my defenses down, a cruel dragon dived at me from the sky, tormented me like a cat plays with a mouse, before breathing with all his fury and thus, delivering the final blow. I managed to win the second round as I recovered better from the Armageddon taxing the folks from the land. But again, I fell to the menagerie of mighty threats.

Simon’s spellbook

After regaining some strength from this skirmish, I walked a sinuous trail leading to a hidden graveyard studded with elephant bones. Following the direction of the pyramids, I faltered a bit entering the site from which a malicious aura emanated. I fought this staggering feeling of dread and advanced my way through the burial site as I heard an eerie half-muffled lamentation halfway through. Looming ahead of me was a spectral apparition from which there was no trace of aught on that illumined face. I had been ambushed by an adept of black magic! I plowed the Specter, but the sorcerer followed by summoning an early Black Knight and bestowed him twice with an unholy magic granting the cavalier more power and some toughness. Things looked grim for me. Although, I transformed the creature into an artifact to keep it at bay thanks to my Circle of Protection: Artifacts. One more time, I freed another djinn from a bottle and he followed my orders as a gesture of goodwill. At this point, my foe had no choice but to blow his third Nevinyrral’s Disk; the first two I took care of before he could activate them. I recovered faster than him and closed the deal with an unusual team composed of Argivian Archaeologist, Martyrs of Korlis and Mishra’s Factory. Alas, the wicked wizard bewitched me with an overwhelming gloom which consumed my thoughts to a point where I was unable to use any white magic for the remainder of the duel. I fell unconscious again.

Remi’s spellbook

I woke under a cloudless sky illuminated by an array of stars led by the full moon. Looking at the horizon, the night lights reflected on buildings which hinted at a nearby city. I headed that way and entered the town that displayed strange brass buildings architecture. As I wandered the town looking for asylum, I stumbled upon an old adversary of the Lat-Nam school of thought. Indeed, the Lat-Nam scholars don’t hesitate to scrap priceless artifacts using spells like Transmute Artifact to fuel their research. For the greater good as they say. What a travesty! These pieces belongs to a museum. Stirred by these profane practices, I didn’t lose a second and while awe could still be seen on his eyes, I channeled my magic to initiate the duel. We started slowly and I kept in check his artifact creatures thanks to Circle of Protection: Artifact. He eventually had to aim his Orb at it and succeeded the flip to get rid of. I eventually conjured another circle alongside my Martyr of Korlis to which he responded by transforming one of his mana jewel into a timely Golgothian Cylex which struck me under shock. No one uses that relic anymore! I ultimately overcame the devastation left by the contrivance and defeated my adversary by answering all of his threats and unearthing buried Triskelions with my archaeological team.

It could have been worse!

After this exhausting challenge, I immediately headed for the city’s great bazaar hoping to find something fitting my taste to break my fast. I bargained for what I was looking for, yet paid around three times the price of what I’m accustomed to. Interestingly enough, I also got a camel as part of the deal. Wandering around, I suddenly felt like the time was slowing around me until everyone, except that mysterious mage, couldn’t even move at all. The enchanter displayed an impressive range of his magic under borrowed time, but eventually the clock tick faster and he finally had to let the charm expire. Our subsequent moves led us to many turns and twists in which I took high ground thanks to an irregular troupe of transmogranted archaeologists. We reviewed our spellbooks and the duel progressed to new avenues. Again, he manipulated the fabrics of time by opening and entering a mysterious vault and summoned a Serra Angel as a conclusion to his convoluted ritual. A seasoned planeswalker like me cannot be fooled by such predictable scheme as I anticipated the move and I immediately sent the cherub reaping reeds in exile. I tried to capitalize on a freshly freed djinn of the bottle, but unfortunately, the tricky wizard unsummoned it using a Boomerang spell which dissipated the creature instead of returning it to my spell book! What kind of sorcery is this! Later on, he did his complex artifice again and capitalized on a lethal fireball. Ultimately, I claimed the victory on a Chaos Orb aiming contest since time took its toll and produced an inevitable deadline.

Finding my way out of the city, I managed to lead my stubborn mount up to a road which ascended a hill that offered a spectacular panorama picturing the pyramids just a couple traveling hours south. Nevertheless, I was glad I had a camel to cross the desert on the way to my final destination since it granted protection from various hazards of the wilderness. I made it at last and carelessly entered the first memorial fueled by adrenaline, distilled byproduct of the alembic where adventure meet risk. Blinded by this euphoria, I was caught off guard by a pair of Tundra Wolves who charged me savagely. I had no choice but to exile one of the ferocious creature since I figured I couldn’t wait for Triskelion to clear my path. I did everything I could to dodge the relentless attacks of wolves, lions and clergyman’s leading the makeshift pack. Although, a timely Armageddon sunk my hopes of invoking a Triskelion, instantly dissipating all bonds I had with lands from which I gathered mana. Our duel resumed and I opted for a different strategy angle. I sent flag bearing archaeologists, factories and trikes hoping to draw bolts and lightning at them to make room for my Preachers. The first evangelist traded his bible for a scythe, but the second one established his zealous presence on the battlefield and recruited an Angel to my cause. My opponent summoned another angel and pressed her to the front line. I pondered and decided to send my own celestial being block the attacker and metamorphosed her into an artifact which seemed to be the optimal move to do. Sadly, my cleric got stuck by lightning afterwards and the angel returned to his original master. What followed is history, an uphill battle I couldn’t win.

Maxime’s spellbook

At last, the coveted eyeglass eluded me as one of the mages I faced earlier claimed the discovery of the treasured artifact in another pyramid. Nevertheless, this enterprise remains one of my favorite adventure, full of perils and surprises, in which I casted some of my favorite spells and used my most beloved artifacts against worthy gentlemen. In the end, I didn’t even returned empty handed since I found another monocle, less prestigious to some, yet more valuable to me, as a reward for taking an unconventional route.

My spellbook and my argivian find

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If you’d like to read from a different point of view about our gathering, I recommend these 2 reports of the event from Tundra Wolves members:

SWE Gentlemen OS at King of the Cage 2019: Beast Island more

Untaming the Wilderness at King of the Cage 2019