I’m having a really hard time putting my feelings into words this week. I still can’t really believe what happened and have had to watch it three times just to get my head around it. Just when I thought the whole thing was coming to an end, somehow John gets tipped off and shows up to pop off on Bethenny and reignite the nightmare I’d just managed to shake myself loose of. I still don't know who called him, or why, and I’m actually still really upset about it. Not. Happy. At. All. As you saw, I was just as surprised as everyone else, and the moment he started on the phone, my insides churned and burned…like I’d just seen a horrible accident on the highway. I didn’t know what to do with myself. I know how John gets when he’s angry, and though he doesn’t scare me, I know he can scare pretty much anyone. At that point, my only goal was to get out of there, go to dinner and call it a night; but the nightmare continued, and this time, it hit really, really close to home on more than a couple of fronts.

Here’s the thing: John is basically a bull in a china shop. I don’t mean to say that Bethenny is “delicate” or “untouchable,” but the moment she gets fired up, it’s literally a bullfight from both ends — and you saw that I was basically the candle burning at both ends between them. Thank God for Jules, who tried to talk some sense into John. Basically, everything he said was just unfounded hearsay and gossip--that’s unacceptable and just downright out of bounds — especially for him! I know why he was angry: Bethenny set out on a total character assassination that remains defamatory to this day. The fallout not only affected me and my relationship but has had a severely damaging effect on my daughter, my parents, our friends and acquaintances. I have to state this one last time: John and I have only spent time with Bethenny that ONE time in the Hamptons when we visited her last summer — that’s it. No dinner, no drinks, no quick drive-by meet and greets…we don’t have any friends in common, except Luann, and Sag Harbor and Bridgehampton are a few too many hundred miles away from Great Barrington to make the trek for weekend getaways.

For the record, John’s comments were wrong, wrong, wrong. He has no right to comment or speculate or judge on her business, her love life, her life, period. That said, Bethenny also has no right whatsoever to insinuate, speculate, accuse or prosecute John for anything — especially in front of friends and strangers…let alone a camera or two. (Or four.) Look, I get it: Bethenny doesn’t like John. She never has and probably never will. I can live with that. John can live with that. Bethenny has to live with that, too.

If anyone, including Bethenny, has any doubt about how wrong these accusations are, they can call me every morning between 7-8AM, check in with me, and they’ll see I’m either making Hannah breakfast, getting my favorite coffee from Eli’s, walking Lucy in Central Park, or heading to Pure Yoga. My daughter lives with me full-time and can attest that John has never slept over at our apartment and this nonsense of being out and partying like Sid and Nancy till 4 or 5 or 6AM is just bullsh--. It’s time for someone to turn that combination microscope-and-sniper-rifle onto someone else.

Of course, that means Jules is in the hot seat. And let me just sum up my thoughts on that with this one simple sentence: She’s a good person with a great heart, an amazing mother, a loving wife, a wonderful friend, and a beautiful 30-something living a young-mother-turned-entrepreneur’s dreams in New York City…not exactly a new concept to any of us or any of you.

It was great to visit her AMAZING house in the Hamptons, and, though I was a nervous wreck, I threw on my Chanel jacket and headed out to see the Witches of Easthampton, Bethenny and Ramona. I’m glad I got to close the loop with them at dinner. And I’ll be honest: I was VERY angry and still VERY hurt — you saw that. But Ramona is from a different zoo than most of us and our friendship has had its ups and downs and ultimately we love one another deeply. This is why we’ve been friends for 20 years--through the good, the bad, and the very ugly. Despite all this, I respect Bethenny. We’ve built a good friendship, and I hope it continues. I know we care and respect each other and that she is actually looking out for me. We’ll work it out, even if it’s in our own special way. No one’s perfect, and some people ride their rollercoaster on our last nerve, but it takes a real woman to issue an apology and a real woman to accept one. (And a real woman to wear those shorts and those heels and not have a smudge of “celluloid.”)

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I’m already nervous about next week, and though it happened months ago, already desperate to get back to the Upper East Side, my real life and routine.

xx,

Dorinda

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