Last night, during the #Killstream (which I forgot to post on the site…sorry!), I was linked to an 8chan thread that was full of David Hogg’s Reddit musings (archive link to his Reddit account). It was even more cringe than I had expected. The most hilarious thing is how Mr. Hogg seems like he would be right at home on /r9k/. If you don’t know what that board is, well, let me Google up a quick explainer for you.

/r9k/ is a forum dedicated to anonymous sharing of personal anecdotes on the image board site 4chan. The /r9k/ community is most well-known for its greentext stories that antagonize social norms and celebrate singledom… [A]s the community evolved, the board transformed into a sharehub for greentext stories, or original anecdotes of social awkwardness or mishaps as told by users who refer to themselves as “robots.”

I spent a solid hour last night laughing about this on stream, but since it looks like no other outlet is going to touch this one, I figured I might as well write it up. Thankfully, I’ve never been one who is conerned with “respectability.” I only care about two things: laughs, and telling it like it is.

With that in mind, let’s take a look at some selected posts from David Hogg’s Reddit account.

Don’t forget the Trump hate, David!

“I often play tennis by myself.” Lol.

Huh, I can’t imagine why no one wanted to be Hogg’s friend! Perhaps it’s because he’s an insufferable brat? I’m just spitballing, here. Who could say, for sure? Perhaps it was the NRA’s fault.

Oof.

You don’t say?

This one sounds a bit problematic…

Here’s Hogg chiming in with his insanely bad spelling and grammar, as usual…

John Oliver being listed as his favorite comedian is very unsurprising…

And he loves his speed…

He also participated in some mild criminality…

Confirmation that this is him, if it wasn’t 100% obvious enough…

Kevin Hogg, 51, left the FBI because he had been diagnosed with early-onset Parkinson’s ­disease several years earlier, Boldrick said. The family has not previously revealed this fact publicly because her husband is embarrassed, she said. (link)

Oh, he always wanted to be a reporter. That’s shocking! Well, at least it looks like he found the way to get there…

Let’s get back to the cringe, though…

This one is…strange.

Celebrating malaria also seems to be pretty strange…

That seems to be the best of the lot, but I’ll come back and update this post if some more funny bits come to light. Most of these posts aren’t really revelatory. They just confirm what most sane people already thought about David Hogg. Namely, that he’s a Low-T headcase who hates his own life and couldn’t get laid if said life depended on it.

Still, it’s always fun to have a good laugh.