“My experience with my boss was upsetting. I was the only female in her team and I think she felt competitive with me. Instead of the mentoring that I would expect to receive from a manager, I felt that she took her insecurities out on me and deliberatively undermined me from doing my job.”

As we celebrate International Women’s Day in 2019, a point in time where we’ve made significant inroads to gender equality in the workplace, it’s also a time to identify areas for continued progress. In that spirit, I feel that I need to bring attention to an issue that is rarely discussed.

The topic is sex discrimination against women, by women.

Don’t get me wrong. I do not wish to perpetuate the bias that women can’t get along and are out to tear each other down. However, I’ve been coming across several examples of this and wanted to shed light on the topic and start a dialogue.

I credit my friend with the quote above; let’s call her Sarah for anonymity’s sake. After having spent nearly two years being obstructed and diminished by her female manager, Sarah filed a legal case against her employer for sex discrimination. She won.

More recently, another friend of mine, let’s call her Emma, also sought legal action against her employer. She joined her company as a senior risk manager, only to find herself relegated to a more junior position once she began reporting to a new female manager.

“She never listened to any of my views, yet she respected the men in our team. I think she wanted me to just sit there and execute, rather than go out and speak to senior stakeholders, who were also her stakeholders.

“She gave me menial, low level tasks like taking minutes and not respecting me. When I brought this issue up with her, she filed a complaint with HR and they immediately put me on notice, undermining the whole point of ‘speaking up’.”

Emma’s lawyers suggested that the best case she could file for was the misinterpretation of role, however, after discussions with her lawyers, she decided not to take action in order to balance the fact that she would be in the industry for at least another 30 years. Protecting her own reputation became of utmost importance. She resigned instead, and immediately found a more suitable role elsewhere.

It concerns me how many cases like these go unreported as a result of the fear of reputational damage, otherwise known as a ‘career limiting move’.

I also wonder how many go unreported as a result of women not tuning into the underlying motives. “My experience with my manager completely disempowered me however I did not lose my self-confidence. I was able to identify that she was feeling insecure about my abilities. I believe some women who may find themselves in my situation could experience feelings of self-doubt and blame themselves before realising the bigger psychological issues at play,” said Emma.