Mathematics and Dickmeatynose were fencing with their faceswords, when suddenly the Aston Martin sprouted legs. The car had a vision: it was a pterodactyl, made of the agonized screams of robot hookers screwing smelly hypocrites in a blender of antimatter, and it was the king of Grand Theft Auto.

The car followed its dreams, sprinting into the casino and kicking cards everywhere, the cards exploding on contact with the unlucky players and killing everybody but Math and Dicknose. Mastodon punched the car, but it laughed then smashed him into dust with its face which it snorted. It queefed fire from its exhaust pipe on Dingalingus, melting him to pure heroin. It threw the heroin at a manatee, which wasn't really a manatee but the ass of Bond, James Bond.

The Aston Martin was blindsided by the arrival of the bombers, but they deftly had their heads kicked into the dimension of poker chips by Bond. But Bond tripped over the corpse of a hooker, from which Le Chiffre hatched after 56,895 years of biostasis.

Le Chiffre laughed, then shot Bond with a laser from his tear duct. Bond deflected the laser by thinking about boobs, then spanked Le Chiffre and ordered him to shake him a dry martini. Le Chiffre stirred the martini, snorted it up his dickhole, summoned Blue Eyes White Dragon, punched the dragon into Bond's liver, then took a 6th dimensional shit into the River of Styx. Satan was enraged at the befouling of his favorite strip club, so Satan took a black hole out of a galaxy beyond the visible universe then slapped Le Chiffre with it. Le Chiffre giggled, took Bond's face off then shoved Bond's face up Satan's angelic cloaca. Satan hissed then turned all the clouds into horny scorpions who had nasty, kinky scorpion orgies in the sky. It was for naught, as every scorpion exploded on contact, flinging scorpion guts and jizz all over the entire Earth and cursing Bond.

James Bond condensed all the scorpion matter into the form of a gun made of neutron star dicks, except it was from an antimatter neutron star, using the magnitude of his sheer passionate lust, then shot Satan 576 times with the bullets, filleting his carcass for buttering and seasoning. Bond took his face back, ripped Satan's skeleton out, made it into wings, then flew to Venus which he broke in half by hitting it with his perfectly formed ass. He threw one half at Le Chiffre's head, then ate the other half of Venus, after screwing it.

Le Chiffre ate the alien hemisphere by absorbing it into his tear duct, then shot bloody Venus tears at Bond. The tears went into his belly button where they laid eggs which were not eggs but poker chips made of hax in Pokemon tournaments and terrible sci-fi aliens. Bond took the rest of the stirred martini and poured it into his navel, killing the eggs but making all the churches die, which made God descend to Earth and slap Bond with xir ambiguous inhuman genitalia.

James Bond gave God the sexy Bond gaze.

God and Bond fucked on top of Le Chiffre while he played Candy Crush.