The Controversial Big Gay Lifestyle

A couple of weeks ago I sent a text to my friend “Beth” about getting together soon. As usual, I’m pretty horrible about keeping in touch with the people in my life. But I digress. “Beth” replied almost immediately saying yes, we needed to get together really soon. We made arrangements to have coffee at Panera South at 11AM in a couple of days.

The day and time rolled around and by 11AM, after a big welcoming hug, “Beth” and I started to catch up. We talked about our families, the issues in our lives, school, some of our goals, and the goings on over the past couple of months. Y’know, pretty boring stuff. It was a great conversation, but honestly, nothing over the top. We were at Panera for a little more than 2 hours. Coffee turned into lunch. We both had conservative lunches of soup, sandwich and tea.

“Beth” asked if I wanted to play a game of fetch with their Golden Retriever, “Spike”. My immediate reaction was, “Hell yes!” I love “Spike” , he’s awesome. We got to Foster Arends and I whipped the ball into the pond over and over again. Each time “Spike” would leap into the water and make a thunderous splash. Between throwing the muddy ball back into the pond and “Spike” shaking the water off, all three of us had bits and pieces of pond on us. It was a pretty epic time.

After playing fetch, “Beth” and I went to the Llama farm so she could pick up some Llama yarn. While there we played with the Llamas. They were as curious about me as I was about them.

We get to “Beth’s” home to hang out for a bit. She’s hospitable and offers me coffee. We say there for a while, me reading “The Paleo Solution” and “Beth” doing her homework for med school. “Beth” mentions that her son will be coming home soon and he’ll want some help with homework and the usual chat with mom.

Later on, “Beth” started cooking dinner and invited me to stay. I obliged. We cooked Tilapia, Squash and made a salad with a vinaigrette dressing. I started helping out with the dishes but I was kicked out of the kitchen.

Around 5ish, “Beth’s” long-term partner, “Penny” came home from her job as a social worker. After a long day at the office she needed to unwind and work in the garden before eating dinner.

We ate diner and it was delicious. Their son “Jake” couldn’t make it. He was having dinner at a friend’s place. “Jake” is a good kid. He’s involved with cross country, theater, track, concert choir, is interested in photography, has an internship with a prominent local photographer, and is a pretty darn good student. Jake just bought a car. Being the responsible kid he is he takes care of the car like it’s his kid, totally careful with it. “Jake’s” only downfall is that he won’t eat his vegetables. Instead he’ll substitute rice. Not bad at all I’d say. His moms have raised him really well.

“Beth” and “Penny’s” home is warm. The colors are conservative; Maroon, Gold, and Sage Green. They have 2 cats and 1 dog. There was a pile of wood by the fireplace and one o their walls in lined with books about social issues, health and personal development. Their walls are covered in pics of family and nature.

I leave after dinner because I have a class to get too. “Beth” and “Penny” do some chores before “Beth” spends the night studying and “Penny” workers on her cases.

This is their Controversial Big Gay Lifestyle. It sounds a lot like your life or the lives of your friends doesn’t it? It sounds like the lives of everyone that’s trying to find their place in the world, find happiness, raise a family, to lead a good and decent life and to just matter.

Voting “Yes” on the marriage Amendment is telling a whole segment of our society that they don’t matter. That they don’t count. That all the work they do to improve their lives and the lives of others while pursing the American Dream is for naught. We’re telling them that they’re second class citizens just because they love someone of the same gender.

How can we as Minnesotans and Americans stand for that? How can we deny basic freedoms like the opportunity to lead a fruitful life with the ones they love?