Every Innovation Starts with an Argument

No harm can come from discussing an alleged taboo subject. We’re no longer in the Dark Ages because someone said, “I don’t think leeches work. I think this penicillin might.” Good call. Someone said, “I don’t think the world is flat. I think we can walk to Europe.” Good call. You should always challenge everything. That’s what science does. Science doesn’t try to prove itself right all the time, it tries to prove itself wrong—and when it can’t, it’s right.

Tell People to Mind Their Own Business

I learned not to worry about offending people when I realized this: Just because you’re offended, it doesn’t mean you’re right. I grew up with people who were offended by mixed marriage. I thought, “What’s it got to do with you? They’re not asking you to marry ’em.” Just like until recently—and still—people have been offended by same-sex marriage. I wanna go, “What’s the problem? They’re not asking you to fuck them.”

Go Ahead and Say What You Want on Social Media

On Twitter, people sometimes say, “Why don’t you keep your opinions to yourself?” I go, “You’re following me. I didn’t tweet at you.” That’s like going to a notice board in the middle of town, seeing a sign for guitar lessons, and yelling, “I DON’T WANT guitar lessons!” Well, it wasn’t for you.

Still: Follow a Few Common-Sense Ground Rules

You shouldn’t criticize things that people can’t help. You shouldn’t criticize a race. That’s ludicrous. You shouldn’t criticize someone for the sex they were born.

You Also Don’t Have to Be a Dick About It

I haven’t got some sort of truth Tourette’s. If someone asks, “Does this dress make me look fat?” I don’t say, “No, it’s all the pies you eat.” I think there’s a difference between being honest when forced and running around trying to hurt people’s feelings. If someone asks, “Can you come to the christening?” I say, “Oh, I can’t. I’m giving blood at the orphanage.” ’Cause I don’t want to say: “No, I hate you, I hate your wife and all your family, your friends disgust me, and I’m not gonna travel on my day off to be at a fucking stupid christening.” I’m not a maniac. I’m not some sort of sociopath. I play the game. You don’t say everything you’re thinking.

And If You Dish It Out, You’d Better Be Able to Take It

When I grew up, it was all about who could come up with the funniest thing—it was sarcasm, it was insults, it was like rap battles but with jokes. And if someone got you, you’d better laugh or come back with something else or you shouldn’t play. What you can’t do is say, “Come on, man, that was too much.” Or cry. It’s like complaining that someone’s kicking the ball too hard in a game of soccer. Well, I’m allowed to kick it hard. You just didn’t like getting hurt.

Ricky Gervais’s new film, Special Correspondents, is available on Netflix on April 29.