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Not this guy. I mean that’s obviously crossing a line. He’s a family man (Picture: Disney)

Growing up you get crushes on all kinds of weird people and things.

Paul Nicholls. Prince Caspian. Joey from New Kids On The Block.

But probably none more weird than cartoon animals, mostly from the Disney films you watched a trillion times in a row.

And, to be fair, there’s a reason you were drawn to them.


Some were pretty damn fine.

So here’s the definitive ranking of hot male cartoon animals.

10. Scrooge McDuck

Sure, he’s old, but he’s also loaded and likely to pop his clogs soon.

Nobody’s first choice but you could do worse – I mean you’d never bother with his nephew, would you?



9. Rude Dog

Yeah, he’s pretty dog-like, but he’s the coolest kid in school.

Remember his gang of followers worshiping his every move?

You know he’d never What’sApp the next day though.

8. Top Cat

‘He’s the chief, he’s the king, but above everything, he’s the most tip top, Top Cat.’

Probably give you a rash though.

7. Danger Mouse

Danger is his FIRST name.

Still, he’d never be able to commit.

Plus he may or may not have a long-term thing with Penfold anyways.

6. The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

Who hasn’t thought about having a five-some with a group of muscly reptiles?

Plus there’d be pizza after.

5. Baloo

He’s not in the best shape, but you know he’d be wild in the sack.

4. The Tramp

Ah, the guy from the wrong side of the tracks turned good for the right woman.

He’s romantic AND not afraid to share a meal.

3. Basil The Great Mouse Detective

The Benedict Cumberbatch of the rodent world.

2. The Beast

Porn star name. Moody. Big strong arms. A classic.

1. Robin Hood

Oh hells yeah.

A charming and charismatic law-breaker with no respect for authority?

This is why you only fall for bad boys IRL, you know.

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