The European Union is like a hospital where all the doctors are mad. It doesn’t matter what is wrong, the treatment is always the same – more integration – and it is always wrong. The best thing to do is never to enter it.

Once you are in, the best thing to do is to leave. If you can’t get out, you will probably die.

Those of us who pay attention to history, politics and truth have known this for many years.

But as the EU’s ‘experts’ and ‘technocrats’ insanely destroy the economies of Greece, Spain and Italy, it must now surely be obvious to everyone.

The EU, far from being a bright future, offers nothing but bankruptcy and decline.

If the old USSR was an Evil Empire – and it was – the EU is the Stupid Empire. Obsessed with the idea that the nation state is obsolete, the EU has sought to bind its colonies tightly, while pretending they are still independent.

This is why what is essentially a modern German empire is not held together by armies, but by a sticky web of regulations and a currency that destroys prosperity wherever it is introduced (with one important exception, Germany itself, for whom the euro means cheap exports to Asia).

It is also why it has been built backwards, starting with the roof and ending with the foundations. Old-fashioned empires were at least honest.

They marched in, plundered everything they could cart away, killed or imprisoned resisters, suborned collaborators, and imposed their language on the conquered.

Other humiliating measures followed – forcing the newly-subject people to live according to the invader’s time, to pay special taxes to their new masters, to surrender control of their borders, to use the invader’s weights and measures, salute the invader’s flag and obey the invader’s laws.

Eventually, after a few years of imposed occupation money, set at a viciously rigged exchange rate, the subjugated nation’s economy would have been reduced to such a devastated and dependent state that it could be forced to accept the imperial currency.

The EU, which cannot admit to being what it really is, has to achieve the same means sideways or backwards. The colonial laws are disguised as local Acts of Parliament. The flag is slowly introduced, the borders stealthily erased, the weights and measures and the clocks gradually brought into conformity.

Resources (such as Britain’s fisheries) are bureaucratically plundered, giant taxes are quietly levied, but collected by our own Revenue & Customs as our ‘contribution’, our banking industry is menaced.

Opponents are politically marginalised, collaborators discreetly rewarded, armed forces quietly dismantled or placed under supranational command. It is happening before our eyes and yet, while the exit is still just open, we make no move to depart.

Our grandchildren will wonder, bitterly, why we were so feeble.





Faces from a lost age of innocence



ITV’s poignant record of several real lives began 49 years ago with Seven Up! and has now reached 56 Up.Hardly anybody can watch this account of disappointed hopes, redemption and human fortitude without tears.

But what makes me saddest of all is to see the faces of the original children. You don’t see seven-year-old children with faces like that any more.

The innocence has already gone. How did we let that happen?





When a new British Prime Minister takes office, he goes immediately to Buckingham Palace to kiss hands with the Monarch. When a new French President takes office, he goes immediately to Berlin to kiss hands with the Chancellor of Germany. Why does nobody comment on this? Is it because it is too embarrassing to acknowledge the tragic truth, that France is a German vassal?





Attention: Mind the claptrap, please



Can I have your attention, all airports, airlines and railway companies – especially railway companies? Will you all please stop making endless, stupid, pointless announcements?

I know how to do up my seat belt. I know what to do when oxygen masks descend. I know my lifejacket has a whistle to attract attention. I also know that, if this plane crashes on land or water, I will die. I know where the train is going. That is why I got on it, to go there. Anyway, there was an illuminated sign on the platform and a sticker on the window, which have already told me – not to mention the station announcer.

I promise to get off when I get to my stop, and to mind the gap between the train and the platform. I know there is a selection of sweet and savoury snacks at the buffet. I promise to report any suspicious activity. I understand that trains have to stop at red signals.

I also know that, when something goes seriously wrong or the train is taken over by menacing drunks, you will fall silent and disappear into a hidden cubby-hole.

And don’t try to make me laugh, as one train company is this week seeking to do by employing an alleged comedian to train staff in making ‘funny’ announcements. Don’t you know that ‘Are you trying to be funny?’ is one of the most menacing expressions in the English language?





From the Nanny State we move on to the Nappy State, in which the Useless Tory Elite will dispense advice on parenting, via vouchers and busybody charities. What do this Tory Elite know about raising children? Their experience consists of expensive schools, a Gap Yah and Oxbridge. They employ nannies to bring up their offspring, being too busy to do it themselves. If they want to improve parenting, they should stop the crazy subsidies that encourage the creation of fatherless families, which all true experts recognise as disastrous for children.





Commissar Suzi passes the baton



I ought to rejoice at the impending departure of the terrifying political-correctness enthusiast Dame Suzi Leather, from the Charity Commission. Her nasty chivvying of independent schools was hypocritical (she went to one, and sent her daughter to one) and destructive.

However, the supposedly conservative Education Secretary Michael Gove has taken over her role as Commissar for Moronic Equality.

Left-wingers all over Britain are still fawning and drooling over a speech that Mr Gove made recently in which he complained about private-school dominance of the professions, but failed to mention that this was caused by the destruction of state grammar schools by Tory and Labour governments.