ok buddy, what you want to do is get a large container of vaseline, like the biggest one you can find. write down a list of your favorite porn sites, or just go to your favorites button. Don t maker any plans for the weekend. Lock yourself in your room and fire up that PC. Now be sure to have some energy bars and Mountain Dew Code Red on hand.... no the other hand.

Do the five knickle shuffle on your 17 year old piss pump untill the schmoo shoots out. Keep doing this over over and over now matter how much it hurts. Remember, you ve got the whole weekend so don t go to sleep. Keep jerkin your gherkin even if hand gets tired, even if you get blisters on your hand and/or schmeckle. Don t give up buddy, this is all you. if you blow your and and a little blood comes out, that s ok. this is all part of the process. Please don t give up. Just keep thinking of the story of the little engine that could. Your johnson is the engine and you are the conductor. Get it rabbit... get it. after 48 to 72 hrs of this, one of your testicles will eventually EXPLODE. There will be a lot of blood and nut much baby batter and you may even bleed out. but hey, you busted a nut. you re the man!