(My wife and I are heading out to pay our rent. I’m seven years older than she is and far more of a child of the ’80s; despite this we’re still absurdly compatible. She’s finishing up telling a story of making new friends at work.)

Wife: “Before I met you, I would never have made a connection with strangers like that. You make me happier, and you make me suck less.”

(I park the car, and she offers me the envelope of cash to pay rent with. We spontaneously chorus, to the tune of ‘You’ve Got the Touch’.)

Us: “WE’VE GOT THE CASH! WE’VE GOT THE FUUUNNNDING!”

*moment’s pause*

Wife: “I take that back. What have you done to me?”