Recap: Saga faced off against Odin and Divaevus and won. We left her in the beginning of a battle with a child.

Oh geez, this kid is a total dweeb. Look at his hairdo. And… is he wearing socks with sandals??

He said he had a Normal-Type team, so this should be a no-brainer.

RED ALERT RED ALERT

DWEEB HAS A BEAR

I was expecting a damn Rattata or Igglybuff or something!!

THE BEAR HAS TAKEN OUT YUKIO

As soon as Shawn steps out onto the battlefield, he punches Ursaring right in that yellow target on her belly. It winds up being that final push sending her back to her trainer.

Why have I completely forgotten all of the Pokemon in the Normal category? Ursaring, Snorlax… there are some pretty beefy dudes in that type…

Snorlax slams Shawn and then knocks him out cold with an Earthquake summoning. I’m thinking, I’ll just send Genevieve out because she’ll be able to withstand this guy and I’ll just start off with Dig so as to avoid getting hit.

But Earthquake still hits your Pokemon while they are underground because it’s an Earthquake… so… of course it would still affect you even if you were below the surface…

Elite Four Dweebo sends out a Togekiss, but we have a Type-Advantage for that. Barret does his usual electric bite routine and Stewart gets all freaked out and withdraws Togekiss before we can faint him.

GEEZ, STEWART, BE A MAN.

Damn, I really should brush up on my knowledge of Normal Pokemon. Completely forgot Lickitung was Normal.

Actually, if we’re being honest here, I should brush of my knowledge of Pokemon types and such in general.

For example, I kept Barret out to fight this Dunsparce after killing Lickitung, only for him to lose against her within two turns. This reminded me, “oh, Dunsparce is like, Ground-Type, right?” so I make Genevieve fight her. Dunsparce uses Body Slam and takes her out instantly. I don’t understand. What the hell is this creature and why is it always so strong?

No, in all seriousness, WHAT is it?

Everytime I run into it I think it’s a Bug. I am then always reminded that it is Ground. But here one is in a Normal team…

It’s like, the ultimate Pokemon. Looks like a bug, can scurry underground and gnaw your ass off before you know it, and has some kind of imaginary armor shit that makes its defense tough to break through.

Anyway, Zephyr keeps the team’s momentum going by taking out the toughest Pokemon we have faced in this battle yet.

Running out of Pokemon options, Stewart puts Togekiss back into the fray for all of two seconds.

Level up for the MVP of the team today.

Exploud doesn’t scare us with his annoying voice. Zephyr doesn’t bat an eye at him.

That was too close for comfort.

One of the first battles of the plot during the post-Champion phase and I almost lose.

We may have to do a little grinding, guys.

Noooooo, you can’t be serious…

Saga is the daughter of Wilson and Aria.

That means this little dweeb is her half-brother?

Wow, that was real nice of Wilson to inform Saga she had a half-sibling.

Dick.

It’s a PokeDex, stupid. You have one.

I can already see this place shouldn’t be taken lightly. We need to be ready for whatever fights come our way from now on.

We head East, like Aria instructed.

There is a cave here in the middle of the water, so Saga uses a bunch of Full Restores and Revives on her Pokemon (who had been grinding on the way here) to prepare for whatever is inside.

I’m thinking Team Asgard’s hiding in here.

Nope.

Cave of Smeargles.

Moving on…

We reach the next city only to find there is nothing here but two people and a Pokemon.

Lady: button on that sign over there!

Ah, so this town is operated entirely by that sign. Interesting.

Poor guy. I’m confused too, little buddy.

Smart concept, making the town a small-ish area and having the buildings appear as you need them. But it’s a hell of a hassle for me.

Saga picks the Hall of Victors to start off with to go ahead and do exactly what we just did a little bit ago and defeat the Elite Four members again.

This one is for Tobias, the Dark-Type guy.

We figure out a Sigil Hall works like a Gym in the sense that you have to fight some trainers before you can get to the main one. With this setup, you can’t avoid any of the trainers because they are blocking the entrances to the next little room.

This… strange old man… is the last trainer before Tobias.

Old Guy: You’re just some random kid! You’re not worthy to be facing Tobias! You’re not even worthy of being a fanboy! That’s my job! Oho! I am the number one Fanboy of Tobias!

Correct me if I’m wrong, but isn’t Tobias the twin of Graham, who is 11 years old? This creepy old man is his biggest fanboy?

Someone needs to call somebody about this.

Creepy Old Guy: You’ll never get past me and my Poison-type team!

He was actually way easier to face than Stewart.

Is that the trainer sprite for the Gentleman Trainer? What the hell is wrong with all of the “gentlemen” in this game?! They’re all creepos!

Sensing my confusion, Tobias offers to clear some stuff up for me before we battle.

We ask him about the fanboys first.

Tobias: Oh… those. I see you’ve met them… Those four have been a thorn in our side for months, now. I wouldn’t pay them any mind. They’re no real threat, just a minor annoyance.

Pain in my ass is more like it. Tell me about the 5th Sigil Hall.

Tobias: I’ve heard about that myth. In all honesty, I don’t believe it. There are four Sigil Halls. Each Sigil Hall is run by a member of the Elite Four. It’s not the Elite Five, Saga. Who would run a 5th Sigil Hall?

Well, everybody told me there wasn’t a Champion either, so I have every reason to doubt the nonexistence of a 5th Sigil Hall! You don’t have to be such a jerk about it.

Barret vs Honchkrow was an awesome matchup for me.

Yukio vs Tyranitar was more risky, but Yukio knew Grass Knot, so I tested fate and left him there. Things turned out well thanks to the fact he got to be the first to attack each turn.

Shawn sees his opponent and instinctively uses a fire move against him. It isn’t very effective. He panics, searching around in the sandstorm that Tyranitar had whipped up before fainting for something he can use to fight. He sees some rocks and begins to smash them over Houndoom’s head. It is working! It is super effective! Shawn watches as Houndoom falls to the floor, clearly unable to continue battling.

Confident in his abilities, Shawn tries to repeat the success of his smashing of rocks on his next enemy, Absol. She laughs at his futile attacks and transforms into a mighty angel who punches his lights out.

Shawn can fight no longer.

It is time for Foxxy to step up to the plate.

Though Foxxy defeated Absol, Hydreigon reminded us we are slightly under-leveled. She viciously one-shots everyone in my team, leaving me no choice but to play the Revive Game. Poor Zephyr and Yukio have the misfortune of being the scapegoats sent into battle while I heal up some of my other members.

A huge chunk of Full Restore + Revive combos later and we defeat the dragon with heads for hands.

The Revive Game is a tedious process:

Send out bait Pokemon.

Revive other member.

Current member faints.

Send out member you just revived.

Revive different member.

Current member faints.

Send out member you just revived.

Revive other member.

Current member faints.

Repeat all steps until either A) someone survives long enough to hit the enemy, or B) enemy is left to Struggle and faints itself.

Honestly, I only do this when I am this close to winning an important battle and I just-so-happen to have enough items to keep this up.

I about flung my laptop across the room when I saw Spiritomb, Tobias’s final Pokemon, survive a turn with a fragment of 1 HP leftover. Then, the PokeGods smiled upon me once again, and the sandstorm that was still raging on killed him.

Tobias is now officially defeated.

He gives Saga a “Victor Sigil”, which I guess is like a badge to show I have won against him.

Whew. Okay, we’ve got one down, four more to go.

That’s right, Tobias, I said FOUR more to go. There IS a 5th Sigil Hall. When I find it, I’m going to text you a picture of it. Yeah. Then you’ll feel stupid.