With global shark attacks on the rise it is more important than ever that humanity re-establish its place at top of the food chain. Shark fighting should be added to the WSL's scoring criteria. A ten point must system, similar to boxing, would be ideal.

Furthermore, all future competitors should be trained in shark karate and provided with water proof side arms which they can employ during the next inevitable attack.

Are sharks evolving? Is it only a matter of time until they learn to ride motorcycles and terrorize coastal neighborhoods? Only time will tell!



Shame on Perrow, Speaker, Prodan, et al for their blatant shark coddling. There's a global interspecies war in the offing, and if you're not with us, you're against us!