A man who transitioned from female to male 15 years ago has said his sex change was his ‘greatest mistake’.

Lee Harries was born Debbie Karemer but after years of struggling with his sexual identity – he asked for gender reassignment aged 44.

The now 60-year-old claims he began private testosterone treatment one day later and had his breasts removed after just three months – starting an 11-year journey to become a man.

Lee Harries was born Debbie Karemer but after years of struggling with his sexual identity – he asked for gender reassignment aged 44 (Picture: SWNS)

But after years of counselling he has stated that he wasn’t transgender – but instead was a woman suffering with complex PTSD, after years of sexual abuse.


He said he now feels like a woman trapped in ‘an approximation of a male body’ and is on the NHS waiting list for an operation to reverse the re-assignment.

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Mr Harries said he is speaking out about gender reassignment reversal in a bid to encourage others to seek talking therapy before surgery.



He said he should never have been allowed to transition – claiming his dissatisfaction with his female body stems from sexual abuse.

Lee, from Hemel Hempstead, said: ‘I look in the mirror through the eyes of that terrified 15-year-old girl and see this funny little man staring back at me.

‘I’m a woman, I’m still Debbie.

‘I wish I could turn back the clock and just have the foresight of what the nightmare the next 15 years would be.

‘I’m a woman I’m not meant to be a bloke. I’m trapped. It’s a complete mess – where do you even start? I just regret the decision.

‘There is this myth that when an individual ‘changes gender’ they go into hospital one gender and come out ‘all done’.

The now 60-year-old claims he began private testosterone treatment one day later (Picture: SWNS)

‘I wish I could turn back the clock and just have the foresight of what the nightmare the next 15 years would be’ (Picture: SWNS)

‘That isn’t the case, there are years of surgeries and hormones for the rest of your life.

‘I know things are a lot better than they were when I had my surgeries, but there is a big lack of talking therapies.

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‘I should have been helped. I’m sure a lot of transgender men feel the same too but I’m the only one honest and brave one to come out and say it.’

Lee said he struggled with his sexual identity for years, even developing objectum sexuality – sexual attraction to objects.

He had a ‘relationship’ with a white Fender Stratocaster and later becoming romantically involved with a fishing rod and an amateur radio.

He added: ‘The thing with objectum sexuality is they are addictions and I felt compelled to have them.

‘Looking back it was just a way of coping with the trauma.’

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Lee, who married partner Alan in December 1997, said he first heard of transgender and gender reassignment surgery in 2002 while watching television.

He said: ‘The programme was introduced as a ‘special’ where transgender men and women were on. At the time it was a state of mind no body really spoke about.

‘I remember seeing them on the TV and thinking “that’s me!”.

‘I suppose they seemed confident in themselves and seemed accepted. That’s all I wanted.

Lee Harries as Deborah (left) before the transition with husband Alan (Picture: SWNS)

Lee Harries, 60, (left) pictured with his husband Alan after the transition (Picture: SWNS)

Mr Harries said the first step towards his realisation was when he approached the police in 2012, to report the abuse at the hands of his father.



Prompted by the Jimmy Saville scandal, he gave statements but his father died from emphysema in 2013, Lee said.

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Lee, who had sought the help of a private counsellor in 2009, said he thought that his feelings about his body might stem from transitioning ‘too late’.

But after four years, in 2013 – after his final op – he said he realised his mistake.

He added: ‘She [the counsellor] started to mention the words ‘childhood trauma’ and it fell into place.

‘It became apparent that transitioning was a big mistake. The session where I realised this was so bad that I had a complete break down and panic attack because I realised it was a huge mistake.

Lee said he struggled with his sexual identity for years, even developing objectum sexuality – sexual attraction to objects (Picture: SWNS)

‘I just miss the old Debbie’ (Picture: SWNS)

‘It should never have happened. It was a big wake up call.

‘Looking back now I realise that it was simply a feeling that if I didn’t have a vagina, I couldn’t be raped. But I’m not a man, I am an approximation of a man.

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‘I wish I could wake up as Debbie and realise that the last 15 years were just as bad a nightmare.’

Lee went to see his GP about becoming a woman again at the start of the year, and said he is awaiting an appointment at a specialist gender identity clinic.

He said: ‘Inside I am still that young girl calling out but I miss looking in the mirror and seeing my feminine self.

‘I just miss the old Debbie.’