Dennis Augustine, a former Pentecostal minister, penned this fantastic termination letter to God:

So this is the end of the road for you as far as I’m concerned. You offer me no value, take credit for work you don’t do and cost too much. I am therefore terminating your position effective immediately and cancelling all contractual obligations between us.

…

If you’re thinking of using me as a reference in the future, don’t bother; I wouldn’t give you a good one. In fact, I’ll tell everyone who asks me not to waste time, love, energy or resources on you. They can do a better job on their own at a fraction of the cost and with better results. I’m sure that won’t bother you as there are many who continue to let you manage their lives. I’ll warn as many of them as I can to stay far away from you.