Cute Babies, awkward blessings

Look, in general babies are supposed to be cute. I get it. Keywords: in general.

I promise, I am not not directing this towards anyone I know. However, it happens all the time in stores. They say my baby is adorable and I feel obligated to say their baby is also cute. Not always true. I apologize to the world’s children. Catch up with me in a few years and I promise to re-objectify you at that time.

My twitter feed has been hooked up to an elaborate device that picks up thoughts of ugly babies. Their thoughts are broadcast on my twitter feed and, consequently, my feed is mostly about boobs. You should follow me.

Undead Llama’s Twitter