TW; abuse, rape, sexual assault.

We are in a period where more eyes than ever before are on the British wrestling scene. Our guys are experiencing more well deserved success than ever before. Recently though, a number of allegations have come to light, of trainers, wrestlers, and promoters that have exposed the seedy underbelly of the wrestling world. Chances are, you already know about this. Perhaps you’ve seen Facebook discussion, or the twitter threads. Perhaps you yourself have been a victim of this shocking behaviour, or witnessed it first hand.

I know I have.

I have been involved in the wrestling business for many years. I am not a big deal. Who I am is not important, and I am staying anonymous because I want this to be about the issues, not my identity. TSG have provided me a platform to do so.

I also have worked in education for a number of years. I have a unique insight into the problems we face, but I also have a few ideas for how we, together, can make it better.

Firstly, we need more people to keep coming forward. I cannot state enough, if you have been through sexual or emotional abuse of any kind, tell somebody. I promise you there are tons of us out here ready and willing to support you.

Sadly, the people who are willing to support you aren’t always the ones you would hope. I have, personally, recieved threatening messages from workers still active today, telling me to forget what I saw when I witnessed them lead underage girls into confined changing rooms. I spoke out then but was summarily dismissed. It was judged at the time that it would cause too much drama.

Same goes for the trainee who once recieved a one month ban for being caught offering to pick a 14 year old up to from school in exchange for oral sex. Far too often I’ve seen incidents like this brushed under the carpet and offenders protected because of ego, or because we have this strange culture that leads us to assume somehow these young girls were asking for it because they wore makeup, or because they responded to the messages.

Let’s be very very clear. The age of consent is what it is for a reason. If someone in a position of power, be they a trainer or be they a wrestler with a bit of pull, is hitting on a girl, the girl is not at fault for responding. Ever. I challenge any of you to try saying no to somebody you know could make or break your dreams.

Promoters, trainers, trainees. Men. We need to do more to create a safe environment. You may be sitting here thinking “well I’ve never done anything inappropriate to a trainee!” Reality check time. If you have ignored a trainees complaint because you’re scared it would negatively impact your business you are part of the problem. I’ve seen it happen before. I won’t let it happen again.

Wrestling is not bad. It does not exclusively attract bad people. But I worry at times we haven’t done enough to flush them out. I’ve seen guys almost come to blows over who got to do a pin drill with a busty new trainee, and strangely the pins always ended up being somewhat, let’s say, unconventional. These kind of microaggresions add up, and lead to the extremes I’ve seen of a certain wrestler on an academy show literally walk up to the ring announcer and put her hand down his pants.

So, how can we make this better?

– TREAT PEOPLE AS PEOPLE. I cannot stress enough how wrestling has a horrible knack of dehumanising people. It’s 2018, can we stop calling female fans rats yet? Because that leads to a complete lack of disrespect and a sense of distrust for ANY woman in wrestling. Protip: not every woman is getting into wrestling because she wants to suck your dick. In fact, I’d wager none of them are.

– On that note, BE A DAMN HUMAN BEING. I know of one former worker who used to brag about having a fan suicidal because of the emotional and sexual torment he subjected her to. This was a 15 year old, extremely vulnerable girl, and this douche used his status to completely take advantage of her. This has to stop.

Finally, I’d like every training school to commit to the installation of a proper safeguarding policy. If you aren’t sure of what this is, it’s taken from the world of education. Every school needs to have one by law. It’s very simple, and just involves a statement of. commitment to the safety and wellbeing of every student. There is one named person in charge, and any issues are documented and handled by that one person. All issues are confidential, unless they need to be passed to relative authorities.

So I implore you. If you own a school, take the time now. Write a short policy. Choose a person. Make your trainees feel safe. British wrestling is hotter than ever before. Let’s keep that going with the next generation.