[dramatic music] ♪ - ALL RIGHT, YA'LL,KEEP YER EYES PEELED AND YER GUNS READY. THERE'S A HEAP OF MEXICANSOUT THERE WHO WANT NOTHING MORETHAN TO SNEAK PAST OUR BORDER, AND WE GOTTA STOP 'EM! - ERIC, YOU WANNA SAY HITO GRANDPA? - NOT NOW, MOM! WE'RE PLAYINGTEXANS VERSUS MEXICANS, GAH! ALL RIGHT, PATROL,Y'ALL KNOW THE DRILL. NOT ONE MEXICANIS TO GET PAST THIS BORDER. NOT A SINGLE ONE!YEE-HAW! kids: YEE-HAW. - FELLOW MEHEECANS! THIS TIME, WE'RE GONNA TRYRUSHING THE TEXANS FROM THE LEFT SIDE! DO NOT GIVE UP HOPE, FOR I AM MANTEQUILLA! VIVA LA MEHEECO! - UH, BUTTERS, I THINKWE'RE GONNA GO BACK TO KYLE BEING TEAM LEADER. - AW, I'M NOT A GOOD MEHEECAN? - YOU'RE A GREAT MEHEECAN,BUTTERS, BUT MAYBE JUST NOTA LEADER OF MEHEECO. - LOOK GUYS, ALL WE NEEDTO DO IS SPLIT UP AND APPLY SOMEGOOD DIVERSION TACTICS. WE'LL USE THE TEXANSEMOTIONS AGAINST THEM. - DEEET DEEET DEEETDO DO DO DO! DEEET DEEET DEEETDO DO DO DO! [robotic voice]SCANNING FOR MEXICANS. DEEET DEEET DEEETDO DO DO DO, DEET--AH! WE'VE GOT A MEXICAN! - HEY, TEXANS! LET ME THROUGH!WE WANT A TREATY! - HE'S TRYINGA SIMPLE DIVERSION TACTIC. THINKS WE'RE STUPID.HA HA! YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO DOBETTER THAN THAT, MEXICAN! - BETTER THAN BEINGA FAT-ASS TEXAN! - HEY!JUST BECAUSE I'M TEXAN DOESN'T MEAN I'M FAT! - NO, YOU'RE FATTO BEGIN WITH, CHUBBY. NOW YOU'RE TEXAN TOO. - OH, YEAH?OH, YEAH? WELL, YOU'REA FUCKIN' JEW, KYLE! AND NOW YOU'RE A MEXICAN JEW! YOU DIRTY NO GOOD MEXIJEW! LET'S JUST SEE YOU TRY AND--- BASE! - CLYDE! WHAT THE FUCKARE YOU DOING? YOU JUST LET A MEXICANTHROUGH! - I WAS ENTHRALLEDWITH THE DIALOGUE EXCHANGE. - YEAH, WELL YOU ALL NEED TOSTAY FOCUSED, GOD DAMN IT! IF YOU LET YOURSELVES GETDISTRACTED FOR EVEN ONE MINUTE, WE'RE GONNA BE OVERRUN WITHTHESE JOBLESS, NO GOOD-- - BASE!- DUDE! HOW DID HE GET PASTTHE FENCE, CRAIG? - I DIDN'T HEAR HIM COMINGWITH ALL YOUR SCREAMING. - NOBODY'S FUCKINGSCREAMING, CRAIG! WAKE THE FUCK UP! - B-BASE!- OH, GOD! [laughter] - SO--SO THEN--SO THEN THE POPE SAYS, "MAYBE YOU SHOULD GOCHECK THE TOILET!" [laughter] - HEY, HEY, I GOT ONE. WHY DO GIRLS WEAR MAKEUPAND PERFUME? - WHY? - 'CAUSE THEY'RE UGLYAND THEY STINK. [laughter] - CARTMAN, STOP POUTINGTHAT YOU LOST THE GAME. - I'M NOT POUTING! I'VE JUST HEARDALL THESE JOKES BEFORE. - SO THEN DON'T HAVEA SLUMBER PARTY IF YOU'RE GONNA BEAN ASSHOLE ALL NIGHT. - AT LEAST I HAVEAN ASSHOLE, KYLE! [laughter]

- [thinking] BOY, I'VE REALLYDONE IT THIS TIME. I HAD ONE SIMPLE DIRECTION."GO THAT WAY." HOW DID I END UPGETTING LOST? MY AMIGOS WERE RIGHT. I AM A LOUSY MEHEECAN. THEY'RE ALL LIVIN'THE GOOD LIFE WHILE I'M--I'M STILL STUCKOUT HERE IN MEHEECO. I AM...THE LAST OF THE MEHEECANS. [sweeping orchestral music] ♪ HELLO? ANYBODY? COME ON, MANTEQUILLA. YOU HAVE TO FINDTHAT BORDER! ♪ LA LA LA,LA LA LA ♪ ♪ WORK, MEHEECAN, WORK ♪ LA LA LA,LA LA LA ♪ ♪ WORK, MEHEECAN, WORK - OH, CAREFUL, DARLING.THE STORM IS GETTING WORSE. - IT SURE IS.I CAN BARELY SEE... - OH, MY GOD, LOOK OUT!IT'S A MEXICAN! [tires squealing] - UNH! OOF! - OH, MY GOD!ARE YOU ALL RIGHT? - POR FAVOR... I HAVE TO GET ACROSSTHE BORDER... MI AMIGOS... MY AMIGOS ARE WAITING... - POOR THING MUST HAVESNUCK ACROSS THE BORDER AND THEN LOST TRACKOF HIS FAMILY. - I AM MANTEQUILLA ... THE LAST OF THE MEHEECANS.

BED.BED! PILLOW. YOU'RE GOING TO BE OKAY.DO YOU UNDERSTAND? - DARLING, I DON'T KNOWIF WE CAN KEEP HIM. - WHAT'RE WE SUPPOSED TO DO? CALL THE POLICE AND HAVE HIMSHIPPED BACK TO MEXICO LIKE SOME ANIMAL? WIN-DOW.WIN-DOW! - YEP, WINDOW. - BUENO! HE'LL HAVE SO MUCH MOREOPPORTUNITY HERE THAN HE EVER WOULDIN MEXICO. WINDOW.WINDOW! WINDEX.WINDEX, MANTEQUILLA. PAPER TOWEL. SI! SI, MANTEQUILLA! - AH, BE SURETO GET THE EDGES. - OH, DARLING,IT'S WONDERFUL.

- NO...NO! MUST PROTECT THE BORDER. EVERYONE'S GETTING THROUGH.NO! CLYDE! WE'RE LOSING! KYLE GOT THROUGH. OH, NO,NOW STAN'S THROUGH! JIMMY, IT'S OVER. ONLY MEXICAN LEFT IS BUTTERS.WE GOT-- BUTTERS! HEY, WAKE UP, YOU GUYS! [boys groaning] WAKE UP, LOSERS! - WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?- WHERE IS BUTTERS? - HE WAS WITH USAT DINNER. WAIT. WAS HE WITH USAT DINNER? - YEAH, I THINK HE WAS.WAIT. - BUTTERS ISONE OF THOSE PEOPLE WHO YOU CAN NEVER REMEMBERIF HE WAS THERE OR NOT. - BUTTERS? - BUTTERS! - JESUS,IT'S FREEZING OUT HERE. HE--HE COULD BE DEAD. - ALL RIGHT, MEN, RALLY UP! THERE'S STILLA MEXICAN OUT THERE AND HE AIN'TGETTIN' THROUGH! YOU HAVEN'T WON YET! GAME ON! - GAME ON! - UGH.GAME ON.

♪ WORK, MEHEECAN, WORK [humming] ♪ WORK, MEHEECAN, WORK - MANTEQUILLA! MANTEQUILLA,COME TO THE LIVING ROOM! WE HAVE A SURPRISE FOR YOU! - SURPRISE! WE SCRAPED SOME MONEY TOGETHERAND GOT YOU SOMETHING. - IT'S A PRESENT, MANTEQUILLA! UN PRESENTE. - WOW!A PRESENT JUST FOR ME? - OH, HE'S SUCH A HAPPYLITTLE MEXICAN. - HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT,MANTEQUILLA? YOUR VERY OWN LEAF BLOWER![chuckles] I HAVE NO IDEA HOW IT WORKS,BUT I'M SURE YOU DO. SAY, HOW'D YOU LIKE TO GOIN THE BACKYARD AND PLAY? [leaf blower whirring] - OH, LOOK AT HIM, DARLING,HE'S SO HAPPY. - OH, NO, NO,MANTEQUILLA! YOU'RE JUST BLOWING THE LEAVESFROM ONE SIDE TO THE OTHER. GET THEM IN ONE PILE SO YOU CAN USE THE GARBAGEBAGS WE LOANED YOU. - SI, SENOR. - OH, HE'S SO ADORABLE. [jazzy melody playing] - ♪ WORK, MEXICAN, WORK ♪ [vocalizing] - ♪ ALL WEEK LONG,BOSSMAN SAY ♪ - ♪ WORK, MEXICAN, WORK ♪ [vocalizing] - ♪ SING YOUR SONG,EARN YOUR PAY ♪ - ♪ WORK, MEXICAN, WORK - ♪ WORK - ♪ MEXICAN - ♪ SWEAT - ♪ MEXICAN - ♪ TOIL - ♪ MEXICAN ♪ IT'S YOUR LOT IN LIFE ♪ WHILE PEOPLE PLAYIN THE SUN ALL DAY ♪ - ♪ WORK, MEXICAN, WORK ♪ [vocalizing] [leaf blower whirring]

- HONEY?HONEY, WHAT'S WRONG? - IT'S MANTEQUILLA. WE'VE TRIED GIVING HIMEVERYTHING, BUT I DON'T THINKHE'S HAPPY. TONIGHT, I TOLD HIMHE COULD DO WHATEVER HE WANTEDBEFORE BED-- WASH THE WINDOWS,MOP UP OUR BATHROOM. BUT YOU KNOW WHAT HE SAID?[sniffling] HE SAID,"I NEED TO GO HOME." I TRIED TELLING HIM, "YOUR HOMEIS HERE, MANTEQUILLA." TU CASA ES AQUI! BUT I DON'T THINKHE FEELS IT. - WELL, MAYBE IF WE LET HIMPAINT THE GARAGE HE'LL FEEL MORELIKE FAMILY AND-- - NO, BRIAN! IN MY HEART,I KNOW IT'S TRUE. HE BELONGSWITH HIS OWN KIND, BRIAN. HE BELONGS WITHHIS OWN KIND! [sobbing] - COME ON, HONEY. - HEY,WHERE ARE YOU GOING? - NO! MANTEQUILLA BAD! GO NOW! - MA'AM, COULD I JUSTUSE YOUR PHONE? - NO ES BUENO, MANTEQUILLA! NO ME MIRES! POR FAVOR! POR FAVOR, NO MIRES! [hysterical sobbing] [engine starts]

JUST YARDS AWAYFROM THE AMERICAN BORDER. ALL MY AMIGOSMADE IT ACROSS, BUT I BECOMELOST IN THE WOODS. IF THE RIPPLESHADN'T A COME ALONG, I MIGHT HAVE FROZE TO DEATH. BUT I'M NOT GIVING UP! FOR I AM MANTEQUILLA! - MANTEQUILLA?- MANTEQUILLA? - NOTHING CAN STOP ME AND MY PRIDEIN MOTHER MEHEECO! HEY, YOU FELLAS THINKYOU CAN HELP ME GET ACROSS THAT BORDER? ALL MY AMIGOSARE THERE, WAITIN' FOR ME. VIVA LA MEHEECO! - ALL RIGHT,LET'S GET HIM INTO E.R. - CAREFUL! MY FOOT! [car pulls up]- [whistles] - WE'RE CROSSIN'THE BORDER!

- PRETTY QUIET OUT THERE. - YEAH, A BIT TOO QUIETIF YOU ASK ME. GIMME THOSE. - JUST SEEMS LIKE MEXICANS DON'T TRY TO CROSSINTO THE U.S. AS MUCH AS THEY USED TO,YOU KNOW? - NO, THEY'RE OUT THERE,CHARLIE. PLOTTIN' THEIR NEXT MOVE. THEY'LL DO ANYTHING THEY CAN TO GET INTO THE LANDOF OPPORTUNITY. AND AS LONG AS THIS COUNTRYOFFERS EVERYONE A BETTER LIFE, THERE'S GONNA BE PEOPLECLAMORING TO GET IN. IT'S THE CURSE OF SUCCESS,CHARLIE. A GREAT AND WEALTHY NATIONWILL ALWAYS BE PLAGUED BY THE NEEDY TRYING TO-- - WHAT THE HELL? UH, SIR... AREN'T THEM MEXICANS RUNNING INTO MEXICO? - THAT DON'T MAKE SENSE. - YOU'RE GOINGTHE WRONG WAY!

BUT MEXICAN PRIDE? THE PHENOMENON IS CALLED "ORGULLO DE MANTEQUILLA," WHERE MEXICANS ARE REALIZING IT ACTUALLY IS STARTING TOSUCK MORE HERE IS THE U.S. THE BORDERS ARE BEING FLOODEDWITH LATIN AMERICANS TRYING TO GET BACKTO THEIR OWN COUNTRIES. - WELL, I THINK IT'S GOOD. IF THE MEXICAN PEOPLE FEELINSPIRED, GOOD FOR THEM. PEOPLE HAVE A RIGHT TO GOAND BE HAPPY. [Darth Vader's voice]NOOOOOO! - BUT JUST WHAT HAS SPARKEDTHE MEXICAN DESIRE TO LIVE IN MEXICO? JOINING US NOWIS ANALYST MARK GIEGER. AND, MARK, WE'VE HEARDOF MEXICAN ICE CREAM, BUT MEXICAN PATRIOTISM? - YES, IT'S A VERY ODDPHENOMENON, CHRIS. - CARTMAN,WHAT THE HELL IS THIS? - YOU GUYS,THE GAME IS OVER. CLEARLY, I WON.GIVE IT UP. - "WANTED BY THE U.S.BORDER PATROL? PERMISSION TO SHOOTON SIGHT"? - YOU GUYS WEREPUTTING OUT FLYERS. I HAD TO PUT SOME OUT, TOO. - BUTTERS HAS BEEN MISSINGFOR A WEEK! YOU MIGHT HAVE INADVERTENTLYGOTTEN HIM KILLED! - WELL, THEN I INADVERTENTLYWON THE GAME, DIDN'T I? - DO YOU HAVE WHAT IT TAKESTO JOIN THE BORDER PATROL? BORDER PATROL OFFICERSARE LOOKING FOR VOLUNTEERS TO HELP WITH THE REVERSEIMMIGRATION CRISIS. - OH, DUDE.SWEET.

♪ [crowd cheering] all: ♪ VAMOS MANTEQUILLA [rythmic clapping] ♪ VAMOS MANTEQUILLA [rhythmic clapping] ♪ VAMOS MANTEQUILLA [rhytmic clapping] - OH, I'M SORRY.I DON'T REALLY-- [cheering loudly] [cheering quietly] [cheering loudly] [cheering quietly] all: OI! OI! ORGULLO! [ascending cheer] - WOW.

YOU VOLUNTEERS ARE THE KEYTO KEEPING THIS COUNTRY SAFE AND PROSPEROUS. EVERY DAY,MORE AND MORE MEXICANS ARE TRYING TO GETPAST THIS FENCE AND GO BACKTO THEIR HOMES IN MEXICO. AS BORDER PATROL OFFICERS, OUR DUTYIS TO STOP MEXICANS FROM CROSSING THE BORDER. WE DON'T NEED TO WORRYABOUT THE SEMANTICS OF WHICH DIRECTIONTHEY'RE GOING. WE'RE JUST SUPPOSED TOSTOP 'EM! MARCUS? - THE STANDARD ISSUEBORDER PATROL WEAPON IS THE P-29 STUN BATON. IT CARRIES A 4,000-WATT CHARGE AND IS YOUR BEST OPTION FORENFORCING BORDER PATROL LAW. - THIS IS GONNA BESO FUCKIN' SWEET. - THE BATON IS NON-LETHAL,BUT POWERFUL-- - HEY, WE GOT SOME!MEXICANS AT 2:00! - LET'S GET READY, RECRUITS! MUST BE A COUPLE DOZENOF 'EM. - DOOT DOOT DOOT DOOTBA BA BA BA DOOT. - THIS IS THE U.S.BORDER PATROL. STOP WHERE YOU ARE. TURN AROUNDAND GET BACK TO WORK. - THERE'S TOO MANY OF 'EM.WE'RE GONNA NEED BACKUP! [baton powering up] [electricity crackling] - YOU'RE PRETTY GOODAT STOPPIN' MEXICANS, SON. WHAT'S YOUR NAME? - CARTMAN. ERIC T. CARTMAN. [dramatic music] ♪ - DEDICATED. PATRIOTIC.TIRELESS. THESE ARE THE MEN AND WOMENOF THE U.S. BORDER PATROL. THEY WORK AROUND THE CLOCK PROTECTING AMERICA'SPROSPERITY. THEY ARE THE FRONT LINEIN MAKING SURE MEXICANS STAY HERE AND WORK. THE BORDER PATROL ISUNCOMPROMISING, DILIGENT, AND COOL. THEY WILL DEFEND, ARREST,AND MOST IMPORTANTLY, LET THE MEXICANS KNOWTHAT THEY ARE WAY BETTER OFF HERE IN UNITED STATES.

♪ [children laughing] [all cheering] - THANKS, EVERYONE! IT SURE HAS BEEN GREATGETTING TO KNOW YOU ALL. YOU'VE BEENREALLY GREAT AMIGOS! IT'S REALLYKIND OF MADE ME... APPRECIATE MY AMIGOSBACK HOME. I KNOWTHEY'RE WAITING FOR ME. AND I'M SURETHEY'RE ALL WORRIED SICK. - MANTEQUILLA... - WHAT DID HE SAY? I ACTUALLYDON'T SPEAK SPANISH.

- DOOO DOOO DOOODEET DEET DEET. DOOO DOOO DOOODEER DEET DEET DEET. [robotic voice]NO MEXICANS DETECTED. [normal voice]HUH, NOTHING. - LET'S FACE IT. THEY'VE JUST ABOUTALL GOTTEN BACK ACROSS. NO MATTER HOW HARD WE TRIED, THE MEXICANS ALL GOT ACROSSTHE BORDER. - WHEN WE ASKED OBAMATO STOP ILLEGAL IMMIGRANTS, WE DIDN'T MEAN TOMAKE THE U.S. SO SHITTY THEY WOULDN'T WANNACOME ANYMORE. - HEY!HEY, WAIT A MINUTE! IT'S A MEXICAN! [dramatic music] ♪ I THINK HE WANTS TOCOME BACK IN! - OH, MY, GOD,IT IS! HEY! HEY! COME ON IN! [whistles]COME ON! COME ON, IT'S OKAY! FUCK ARE YOU DOIN'? GET THAT GATE OPEN! - COME ON, BUDDY!- COME ON NOW! - YOU GOT IT! - WAIT A MINUTE,ISN'T THAT-- - GAME ON! - OH, NO, YOU DON'T! - AAH! - FUCK ARE YOU DOIN? - THAT ASSHOLE IS NOTGETTING ACROSS MY BORDER! - [grunting]AH! [whimpering] I'LL GET OVER! - NO, YOU WON'T, BUTTERS.

- [whistles] [announcer on radiospeaking in Spanish] all: OH! [gunfire] - HEY! [sirens] - MANTEQUILLA AYUDAR LA BORDER PATROL! [all cheering] - RESPECTO MI ATORIDAD! - BORDER PATROL PEGARON EL CREDO GORDO! - WHERE THE FUCKDID HE GO? AH-HA![engine revving] [burro braying] [gunfire] [grunting] HA HA!GAME OVER, BUTTERS! YOU LOSE! THE FUCK IS THIS? NO...NO! - HA HA![giggles] - NOOOOOO! - BASE! [Mexicans cheeringin distance] - EL BASO! BASE-OOOOO! [all cheering,music playing] [cheering continues] [laughter]