DNA Story Part 1

For those who don't know me personally, my sister Andi and I were adopted as kids. This is our story, or I guess, my story. This is completely from my perspective. It is hard to write, but I need to. So here it goes.



About a year ago this May, my sister Andi told me she had taken a DNA test through 23andme. I thought we would find out what our ethnicity was, maybe even some health information. Andi told me about the DNA connections through this test and my mind immediately went to Tisba. Tisba Fagan or Eagan was the name on my birth certificate I had gotten a copy of over 12 years ago. I had had to drive all the way from Tucson to Wickenburg AZ to get it, but thank goodness I had gotten it before we moved out to NC! Andi and I had searched and searched for Tisba, but nothing ever came of it.



Tisba had become a very real person in my mind. She had long pretty brown hair, she loved us more than anything in this world and she had desperately wanted us to have the life she couldn't. She had obviously been taken advantage of by my birth father. That was evident by the age difference on my birth certificate. She was 17 when I was born, which meant she was 15 when Andi was born. We also had a baby brother in one of the photos, so she had 3 kids back to back. My birth father was in his 40s! Ew. Poor Tisba! I imagined her leaving us at the DSS office, her driving away, sobbing. Her heart must have been so broken. I imagined she drove until she couldn't drive anymore. Cried till she couldn't cry anymore. Eventually, she began to heal and start a new life for herself. I imagined she fell in love and had kids, a loving husband, probably a dog or two. I imagined she was happy, loved gardening. I knew she thought of us often. She probably felt judged and my heart broke for her when I thought about that. I wanted so badly to tell her we were happy. We were okay! I wanted to thank her.



I told everyone there are 2 things I didn't want. I didn't want to find that our father was a pedophile and I didn't want to find that Tisba left more kids. Other than that, I could handle ANYTHING!



When the test came back, it was on. Andi and I spent hours everyday talking and working through the data. Andi was so good with all of this! Her brain made connections mine couldn't. She was a master at this stuff! Right away we connected with Jennie and Jaime so we messaged them and BAM! That started the ball rolling for our fathers side.

Jennie and Jaime, as it turns out, are our neices from our BROTHER Jimmy. The girls told me how much I look like their Aunt Nancy. "Nancy?!" Oh my goodness, we have a SISTER!! Nancy, her daughters, Jennie, Jaime, Andi and I joined together to find others. I knew our father's last name was Hopper so I quickly found a James and Robin Hopper. I messaged Robin and realized Robin and James were our siblings too! Robin told us about our Aunts Thelma, Wilma and Alma. Holy crap!! We have Aunts!! Robin also told us of her brother, Dale. She said he had a different father and hadn't been raised with them. Soon, our birth father's story became more clear.



Lloyd Hopper had been raised in CA with his Mom, Dad and 3 sisters. He was married young to Robin's mom, they had kids, he left before Robin was born. After that he married a woman named Cricket and had 3 kids with her and left. Next he was with Nancy and Jimmy's Mom. He left before Jimmy was born. At some point, he met Tisba, they had 3 kids and that's where his story goes cold. We don't know where he went after that but we did find that he had passed. He passed away in Hawaii and it was up to us to request his death certificate.



The Aunts were warm, friendly and full of questions and information. They said their brother was funny, a jokester, and a pedophile. My heart broke. At the same time we were getting to know all this new family. It certainly helped the heart break.



In that time, I took a trip to Ohio to meet Nancy in person. I drove 8 or 10 hours and was so nervous. My nervousness melted away into an excited calm the moment we met. Nancy is warm, funny, well dressed and beautiful. She has 3 kids, Carlos, Jessica and Marcy. As well as a grandbaby, Oreo! We spent the weekend going on longs walks, eating by the water and spending hours talking. Oh how I miss her as I write this.



We started to get to know Robin, James, Jimmy and their kids. As well as our Aunts and their children.... OUR COUSINS!!



Robin lives in CA with her husband, they are really close with Robin's 3 kids, Rion, Amber and Julie. Robin loves to be outdoors, hiking, kayaking, anything! She is full of love and acceptance.



James is recently married and lives with his wife, Judy, in South Africa! He is a cool, hippie guy with a deep laugh and broad smile.



Jimmy lives in San Diego and is absolutely hilarious. He makes me laugh till I cry. His girls Jennie and Jaime are the same way. Jimmy doesn't talk about deep stuff much, but with this many sisters, I think I'm covered on that anyway. Lol He makes jokes about what a playboy our father was. A rolling stone. I love Jimmy's ability to take the positives from our father and leave the rest. It's a lesson I really need to learn!



Meanwhile, Andi had made some new connections herself. She was studying the 23andme test and found someone who was not related to our father's side which meant a clue to finding TISBA! Our baby brother!! Andi found Anastasia and Anastasia's mom, Rhonda. Eventually we all started chatting desperate to find how we all fit together. Anastasia is an artist, she has beautiful red hair and a brilliant personality to match. Rhonda is funny, warm and made us feel like we were already part of the family. I felt so excited to be getting so close to Tisba. It was only a matter of time now and I'd be besties with Tisba and hanging out with our baby brother. Any day now! Having no luck, it was decided that I should take the Ancestory.com test and so I did.



Again we waited weeks for it to complete. When my test came back the first thing I noticed was the name Dale. The brother that Robin had not grown up with was in fact, my brother too. So he was Lloyd's. That made 8 new siblings on his side even if we hadn't found Crickets kids yet.



