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Today the German and international media, politicians and activists are all in a celebratory mood – the climate catastrophe is back after all. It’s real and approaching faster than ever. The UN just certified it! Climate activists are in a state of euphoria again – they’re out dancing in the streets – there hasn’t been such a feeling since 2007. It’s climate Oktoberfest for the alarmists.

It’s been six long years of relentless torment inflicted by Neanderthal skeptics. Worse, the public was even starting to become hopeful about the future once again, and were becoming less afraid of climate. For the climate catastrophe everything had been looking so bleak as the pesky real observations glaringly contradicted the modeled catastrophes 15 years long.

But happy days are back again – the catastrophe is coming, the UN reassures the world. The 15 years of model failure are not significant after all. In fact the UN now says the models are better than ever and the climate scientists are now 95% confident the climate catastrophe is coming and that our living standards are responsible for it. Never before have scientists been more confident.

Even more encouraging: sea levels will rise faster than expected. Rest assured, the climate catastrophe is coming and things are more urgent than ever. Don’t let any skeptic tell you otherwise, as they only want to spread some damn optimism about the future.

Today alarmists in Germany (and globally) are more giddy than we’ve seen in a very long time. Many alarmists will be going to bed tonight feeling more content than ever, believing they’ll be waking up to a tomorrow of imminent catastrophe.

Here are some quotes from the German news:

“It’s here: the new IPCC report is here! … Congratulations to all colleagues who participated. … Many developments are assessed as being more urgent than in the IPCC AR4 of 2007,” so cheers Stefan Rahmstorf at Scilogs.

“Climate change is real, and its happening at an alarming rate,” proclaim NGO organizations like WWF, Greenpeace, Oxfam, Friends of the Earth, Actionaid and Christian Aid with uncontrollable glee.

“We have indeed even less time than we thought,” gloats a giddy Stefan Rahmstorf of the Potsdam-Institute for Climate Impact Research.

“The climate deniers still owe us a convincing answer: if 95% certainty is not enough reason to act, what is it then?” demands Connie Hedeguaard at Twitter.

“Except for the temperature, everything else has accelerated,” beams Stephan Singer of the WWF.

“A very clear signal to the world,” admonishes Mojib Latif of the Geomar Helmholtz Center.

“There’s no problem with the science, rather there’s a problem with taking action,” lectures the kooky side of Spiegel Online.

“As the IPCC and its new report state, sea level could rise much faster by the end of the century than previously believed,” reassures online FOCUS.

Let the alarmists have their day. In the end we all know it isn’t going to last long at all. You can dig up a corpse, clean it up, dress it, and parade it through town claiming it’s alive. But in reality it’s a lifeless, rotting and ghoulish cadaver, and it’s not ever going to be coming back to life.

AR5 is the IPCC’s Order of AGW Exhumation. The alarmists are now parading the corpse, pretending it’s alive and in ruddy health.

But AGW science is dead, and has been so 15 years. It’s not taking a nap, it’s not passed out, it’s not even breathing. It’s long deceased. The UN IPCC and climate activists refuse to come to terms with that.