BRUSSELS—Suddenly overcome by a swell of emotion while rebuking the other members for their unwillingness to share the burden of mutual security obligations, a tearful President Trump admitted Wednesday to his fellow world leaders that the NATO alliance is the closest thing to friendship he’s ever had. “I’m sorry to get so sentimental, but this is really the first time in my life that I’ve ever even come close to experiencing a real sense of camaraderie with other human beings,” said a sniffling Trump, his voice cracking while noting that he can’t remember a time prior to their yearly summits when he felt like he belonged and could be his true self. “I know that we argue and say some really horrible things to each other sometimes, but this relationship I have with all of you is so special to me. The bond that the 29 of us share is my dearest, most cherished possession, and I will treasure it always.” Trump then asked his allies to forgive his emotional display before reminding them that if they don’t put forward the full 4 percent of their GDP for defense, they can “all fucking forget about receiving any U.S. military support in the future.”

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