Mario Lopez takes his dimples to space military school in The Journey: Absolution! A movie that contains no journey and even less absolution. But it does contain dialogue like this, an actual conversation in the film:

"What time is it?"

"9:22."

"9:22, that's about what I thought."

Speaking of time, the movie finds us 30 years after some sort of vague apocalypse that has led to some sort of vague future military base where Mario Lopez, Richard Grieco, and Jaime Pressly can vaguely act. One thing that isn’t vague: the movie is mostly about shirtless army guys doing shirtless things together, shirtlessly. Think the beach volleyball scene in Top Gun but with even fewer shirts. Also it turns out later that some of the shirtless guys are aliens. Or monsters from another dimension, or something. It’s not totally clear, but the important thing is, it’s exactly 9:22.

If that’s not enough, this film was made by the same director who brought you A Talking Cat!?! (he released that one under a pseudonym, but put his own name on The Journey: Absolution, so make that of what you will).

This one is a lot of fun, we hope you’ll join Mike, Kevin, and Bill for The Journey: Absolution. No shirts required!

Head writer

Mike Nelson

Additional contributors:

Conor Lastowka - Senior Writer

Sean Thomason - Senior Writer

Contributing Writers: Molly Hodgdon, Jason Miller, and Mike Schuster