FROM: sylyssable

SUBJECT: PS Parties- The Real Problem

DATE: 6/12/10

Firstly, I would like to thank everyone for their interest and concern about my medical adventure. It seems that in just 3 years, technology has advanced so an overnight hospital stay is no longer required for the cardiac-cathater procedure. Although the initial nuclear tracer scan suggested that there was some arterial blockage, it turns out there was none. The very small stent (something like a spring-steel Chinese finger trap that holds arteries open) is working fine after 3 years, which means it will continue to do so. So, as far as my heart goes, I'm good. (the CYD and Vivi-sector folks will have to hope for some other form of demise for me).

Now, onto the PS Party problem. Notice that is stated in the singular, not plural...

We have had problems with the parties in the past. Some of the problems were strictly internal. We have had to deal with problem guests, usually involving alcohol or other drugs, some medical troubles and accidents, some improper behavior (drama-related).

Some of the problems involved the neighbors. Usually, this was due to noise and traffic/parking problems. Most of the noise problems have been avoided. The traffic/parking problems still haunt us. People will have to be more careful, courteous drivers around our crowded street(s).

So, what is THE problem? The one that causes the most complaints and visits form our local public servants? Loitering and Trespassing. In a nut-shell, that's it.

Why? Well, first of all, it is impossible for 100 + people coming to the party to park close to the PS. Second, the property line of every home on all the residential streets around the PS GOES TO THE CURB. Yes, the sidewalks are on PRIVATE PROPERTY. Before anyone decides to argue this point, I will state that I have looked into this, and it's true.

In 1949, the city made a deal with the residents so that sidewalks could be placed down "main" street of Gilbert. Any resident can reclaim this part of their property any time they wish (and some have). This means that anyone walking down the street, or stopping on the sidewalk for any reason, is on someone's private property. If you drop trash on the area between the sidewalk and the curb, you have just littered someone's front yard.

The point is, if you are a "good citizen" type, and behave yourself at the parties, follow that rules, BUT, you stand around your car, or on the sidewalk greeting friends, talking, etc. You are Part of the Problem. The later is gets, the worse things become. You and your friends are trespassing and loitering on someone's front lawn, and they are likely to call the police before they will ask you to move along.

The important thing to realize is that this is the very problem that almost caused Rick and Tess to cancel their huge parties, years ago. (that and the traffic/parking problem)

The solution is simple. If you are coming to the PS party:

1. Find a place to park that is not blocking anyone (and avoid parking in front of any property on the corner of Imperial and Gilbert, as these are the most sensitive neighbors we have to deal with, AND it's just a dangerous place to park).

2. Unload your vehicle and move quickly and quietly to the PS house, avoiding walking on the street side of parked cars on Gilbert (unless you have a death wish).

3. When it's time to leave, repeat the process in reverse. Move quickly and quietly (and safely) to your vehicle. Don't stand around chatting, just get in and go. It's a good idea not to sit around in your car for a long time either. Sitting in your car and drinking alcohol before of after the party is just stupid. There are open container laws in this city, and since the police may be around checking on things, you are just asking for trouble.

4. If you have any litter, such as food/drink trash, leave it at the PS, or stow it in your car. Do not drop it on anyone's property, or in the gutter.

If everyone coming to the PS party observed these simple guidelines (notice I didn't say "rules"), the major reason for neighbor complaints would be reduced or eliminated.

What about the fursuit migration to In-n-out? Well, amazingly, except for the single run-in with the redneck family across the street (they were drunk and therefore looking for trouble), we have had NO COMPLAINTS about it!

This proves my point. The fursuiters meet up on PS property, then move in an orderly fashion to the In-N-Out Burger patio, then they come back a while later (usually in small groups). No problem.

There you have it. If we continue to do everything we have been doing right, and solve this last problem, everything will be cool with the neighborhood. Or at least AS cool as it can be.

Because of the nature of our community, our parties are very obvious. It is even quite possible that we could be blamed for things that we didn't do. This means we have to be extra careful, extra vigilant and extra polite. I have no reason to believe we can't be.

The important thing is that this information has to get out to everybody who attends the PS parties. Many don't read this forum, nor SoCal Furs. This means that if you know anyone that is likely to attend the party, but is "in the dark", you need to inform them. If you invite anyone, you need to tell them about this. If you see anyone standing around or playing around on our neighbor's property, remind them. I understand it may be difficult to curb your enthusiasm at meeting friends... but please try to hold the greetings/play-fights for when you actually arrive at the PS.

I'm sorry for the long message, but I hope it will help clear up things.

Note: as for the theory of "non-furs" invading the PS in droves, who would not get the message the party for June was canceled... It's now 7:35, and we have not had a single person show up asking about the party.

Be sure to join us next month (July 10, 2010) for our regularly scheduled PS Party. We're all looking forward to seeing you again!

____________________________________________________________________________________

SUBJECT: Prancing Skiltaire Party Secret Santa

DATE: 12/5/12

For those curious or new to the PS parties, The December gathering includes our holiday gift exchange. Of course, everyone is welcome to being gifts and deliver them to her friends... but we also the gift exchange. Here's how it works...

Everyone who brings a gift (gift-wrapped), should proceed to my desk in the den (the desk on the back wall, closest to the patio door), and have me put your name on the Solstice Holiday Interactive Treasures list. The name you give me is the one we will call out when it's time to get your gift, so it should be one you can easily recognize over the crowd noise... After you give me your name THEN put the present you brought under the Fur Tree in the library. Remember to give me (or Rod) your name BEFORE you put your gift under the tree. (so you don't get left out).

Around 9PM, everyone gathers around the Fur Tree, and Rodney calls out the names from the list. Each person on the list gets to pick one gift from under the tree. Usually they unwrap so everyone else can see what they got.

What should I bring for a gift? Glad you asked! We don't expect people to bring a 50" flat screen TVS or a new Mercedes autos... (they are difficult to wrap and fit under the tree anyway), but your gift should be something cool that a furry would like, with a value around $ 10.00 or so. That is the value of the gift, not what you have to pay for it... Comics (graphic novels), books, DVDs, action figures and other collectables, plushies, art supplies, art, music, 'used' items are OK, as long as they still work... Artists sometimes offer commission "coupons"... if you can provide a creative service (like special printing, animation, writing, etc.) coupons are fine BUT, you really have to provide the service to the person who gets your gift.

What isn't cool for a gift? Promotional items (free stuff you get at trade shows, or frees samples), video tapes (unless they are something very special), thrown-away (recycled) items (unless they are cool). Basically, don't bring something that you would not like to receive.

Of course, people can trade their gifts with others, so everyone is happy.

Can I bring more then one gift? Yes, but please, no more then 2. It gets complicated...

If you have any specific questions about this happy giving free-for-all, just ask on this list, or call me at home (714) XXX-XXXX, ext. XXX, and leave a message. Don't forget to include your return information... phone or e-mail.

Hope to see you all at the party.

Happy Holidays!

Sy

________________________________

SUBJECT: SPRING CLEANING

DATE: 6/3/13

Hello to all of your Prancing Skiltaire-ites. It's me, Sylys Sable,

proprietor of the PS. Things have been going great with the parties

this last year, with many new people showing up each time, and many

bringing snacks and drinks, cooking food, and providing

entertainment. We hosts have been very happy that so many of your have

taken the time to thank us in person, and say hi when we meet

elsewhere. It's really nice to be appreciated.

So... is everything perfect? Well, no... We do need to clean up our

act some. Withe so many new people showing up, who don't know the rules (we don't have many), or have not learned the protocols that the old-school PS Club members are well aware of. It's up to all of us to help the new people get into the swing of things, and make the party a great experience for everybody!

Here are a few items we need to improve on...

1. Rough-housing and unsolicited physical contact.

This is important! I have been informed that some very cool people are

avoiding the PS for this reason. The problem can be as extreme as

somebody running into and knocking someone over, hitting someone with

something, groping and even unsolicited hugs. Furries are a much

more tactile bunch then a lot of fan groups, but you should Never Assume that anyone else you encounter will be comfortable with anyinvasion of their personal space.

The rough stuff needs to stop. No sword fighting or martial arts

demonstrations with swords or sticks. We have no designated areas set

aside for such demonstrations. It may be possible to arrange such a

thing, but it would have to be set up in advance. There is no need to

run around, either. If you have to chase someone, chase them down the

sidewalk, while it's still light, and don't run across the street! The

cars may not stop.

The PS is CROWDED, and there will be accidental bumps and brushes.

It's simple to apologize when you accidentally come in contact with someone else. Otherwise, don't jump on people, grab them, grope them or hug them unless they indicate it's OK.

Don't think that it's OK to grope someone because you can get away

with it in the crowd, and it's all in fun anyway. People are different. What is ok with one person might really upset another. We aren't going to play the "oh, well, if they can't take it, they should leave" game either. Some people may be offended just observing some kinds of physical contact. Do we really have to try to upset people by showing how wild and crazy we can be? Why would we want to try to shock our fellow furry friends?

It's just not polite.

So, don't do anything physical that would get you thrown out of a

shopping center. No exposing areas or your or other's bodies that

would be considered inappropriate in public. No obvious groping, no

'dry humping', no wrestling. Publicly acceptable displays of affection are OK.

Help us out here. You may not do any of the bad stuff I'm talking

about, but you may know someone who does, of see it happen. If you

can, remind the people involved to please stop. If you don't want to

get involved, tell one of the PS crew about it. Let's not drive any more of our friends away.

2. Alcohol, etc.

Alcohol is not allowed at the PS party. Period. This goes for other

intoxicants and controlled substances. Pot is not yet legal in

California (except for medicinal purposes, and if you are using it for

that reason, please use it elsewhere). Unfortunately, people are still

drinking alcohol around the neighborhood, then coming to the party. I

guess some people just cannot handle dealing with others without some

kind of 'buz' to build up their confidence. Oh please! The other

problem with this is that for some reason, people who do this can't

take care of their own empty bottles, cans, boxes and bags, so it

becomes a litter problem, too. We really don't need drunken slobs at the PS. If you do this, stop. If you know someone who does this, or see someone who does this, remind them about the rules, or tell us about it. For those who insist that a party has to involve getting buzzed, please go elsewhere.

3. Weapons, real or otherwise.

The PS is not a gun show. If you have real guns, even if you are a

certified expert in handling weapons, and have trigger locks, etc.

DO NOT bring your weapons on to the PS property, even just to show one

person. The same thing goes for large bladed weapons, swords, spears,

metal-tipped staffs and real metal martial arts weapons. If they are

around, someone may decide to try them out, and someone may get hurt.

As for realistic replica guns (Airsoft, BB, pellet, etc.), and paint ball guns... No. Don't bring them. If you have completely

non-working replica guns, it's still a good idea to not bring them to a party. The police have been on the property from time to time, and if you pay nay attention to the news, you know what can happen.

Any other soft of toy weapon, including soft projectile guns (Nerf.

etc.) and water guns are OK to bring. BUT. Don't shoot them at

people! Silly string and slime toys are not allowed, due to the

difficulty of cleaning up the mess they make.

4. Driving and parking

Everyone wants to park as close as possible to the party. After all,

we furries certainly don't need any more exercise! Gilbert is a

two-lane street with space for parking on both sides, BUT the street

is VERY BUSY. People drive way too fast, and with all the furries

around, the drivers will be gawking. This is a very bad combination!

There have been accidents, all minor SO FAR. and no one has been hit

by car... SO FAR. There have been some very close calls...

If you are going to try to park on Gilbert, do a good job. Parallel

parking is tricky, and it's easy to make a spacing mistake and block

someone else in. Don't do this. DO NOT BLOCK ANY DRIVEWAY, not even a

little. Don't park in front of the houses on the corner of Imperial

and Gilbert. That's just the houses on the 4 corners. The most

complaints we have had from neighbors have come from these houses, and

involved parking, littering, and loitering on private property. Also,

parking there obstructs visibility at the 4-way stop, making it extra

dangerous for both cars and pedestrians.

Related to the parking issue is the private property problem. Even

though there are sidewalks along Gilbert, the property line of all the

houses goes TO THE CURB. You should not be standing on anyone's lawn,

and not standing around on the sidewalk, blocking foot and bicycle

(yes, bicycles use the sidewalks) traffic, nor in the area between the

sidewalk and the curb. When you arrive, get out of your car and move

to the PS. When you leave the PS, got to your car and get in.

This ends my rant for now. If anyone actually read it, I appreciate it. It's important to remember that the PS Party works because we all take care of each other. There will always be new people who don't know how it all works, and people will get excited and forget to think. Some people haven't had much experience being around large groups. But the party should be fun for everyone! We can make it that way. If someone forgets, we can remind them. No need to call the police. We furries take care of our own. The Prancing Skiltaire parties have been going strong since 2005, and I see no reason they can't continue. Lets all work together to make the party fun for everyone, and maybe even some of our friends that have left will return. We miss them.

Sylys

______________________________________________________

SUBJECT: HOLIDAY PARTIES

DATE: 11/6/14

It's that time of year again. The holiday parties at the PS are some of the most fun, and also the best attended.

We are seeing a lot more new people show up, and some aren't even a part of the furry community (yet). I want us all to welcome these new friends to the pack, but we also need the help of you who have been with us for a long time to help pass on the protocols and culture that makes the parties work. here are some of the important things to pass on to the new folks.

No alcohol- this also means no sneaking in alcohol and hiding it. This is important, as it can cause the worst problems for everyone.

Food- Food and snacks are provided for people attending the parties by us and many of you others (thank you!). However, this does not mean all food found in the kitchen is for the party! Most available food/drinks are on the table in the dining area, or on the counters in the kitchen. Food and drinks found elsewhere, like on top of the refrigerator, in the refrigerator, in cabinets, etc. is NOT for the party. This is food that belongs to the people that live here. Please respect our property. If you aren't sure about the status of something you see, ask one of us.

Unsolicited physical contact- This is still the source of our most complaints. Furs are playful and affectionate and often physical about it. This does not make it right to poke, grab, grope, fondle, tickle, slap, glomp or hug anyone without consent. It is particularly bad if people are doing this and trying to be anonymous. Horseplay (no offense, equians) is also not tolerated. The party is too crowded for pushing and shoving. Someone can get hurt. I assume that the regulars are well aware of these issues, but some of the new people may not. If you notice someone abusing other's personal space, let them know it's not cool, or tell us.

This one common problem can hurt the reputation of the PS events, and ends up making us all look bad.

Thank you for reading this, and helping keeping the PS party fun for everyone!