DeLeon called me out of breath a couple of weeks ago. He has a degree and is out of work living in Denver. What he told me shocked me. He had spent 6 hours waiting in line to be seen putting in his energy assistance application. Folks were handing out cups of water in line. DeLeon told me he was informed that the phone wait was down to 3-4 hours, but he didn't have that many minutes on his phone, and he wanted to save those for calling for jobs. We talked about how his unemployment visa card fees chewed up precious dollars, taking the bus everywhere, and the importance of keeping his apartment. He told me, 'damn, I hope I can keep my lights on, but if I gotta go around in the dark, fine, I just don't want to be homeless, shit I'm hungry enough already' laughing. I asked him when was the last time he ate and he said softly, 'dude, you don't want to know'.

Sherry is a young single mother of 2 teenage kids in high school in Wisconsin. She called (last winter) because her gas bill, i.e. heating bill was over $400.00 for the third consecutive month. She was sobbing. She couldn't keep up, she said, and the energy assistance had given her all the money they could for that season. Her balance had climbed to over $1000.00. Here's the kicker-her rented home was freezing, even though her furnace was running constantly. Her landlord was unavailable, and even the city provided her with no relief. She had to send her high school kids to bed with their winter overcoats, boots and mittens on. I have spoken to many Sherrys' in the exact same position.

A newly minted homeless mother of three calling to try and pay a 750.00 utility bill so she can protect her credit. You see in Colorado, utility assistance doesn't start until Nov 1. Her bill will go to collection first. She doesn't have the money for basics. Her kids have never been homeless. She was sobbing and crying and screaming down the phone about how she doesn't know how to be homeless, and she never wanted to be homeless. She had a good job, then her man left and she ran out of unemployment and she got evicted 'cause her son threw some shit at a neighbor. She whispered in the phone help me help me. I gave her a no money down extension for 3 months and told her to not worry about the bill 'cause we have to hook her up anyway it's the law. Take care of your kids, be strong for them, pull yourself together, don't cry, you're an awesome person. I hung up and tears kept hitting the keyboard.

A sister of a male customer in Saint Paul,MN called crying. 'Do you know where Ray is?' she asked. Sorry, I don't understand. 'Ray lost his job of 27 years, he is mentally challenged and has been very depressed. He got evicted so stop his service and put my phone number on a note on his account in case he calls to stop his service. Please, please I beg you to have him call me if he calls. His job was his life' She hung up.

Lucia was visited by our door to door disconnector in New Mexico. She had a modest past due bill, and the field collector had taken the unusual step of calling in for the customer to see if we could help. After passing the phone over to Lucia, I asked for her special circumstances on what seemed to be the problem. There, there, stop crying and tell me your story, I said. 'I work 3 jobs, and 2 haven't paid me in a month and the other only part pays me. My children are hungry, and my husband left for Texas for some work and hasn't got any yet. I don't know what to do. I quietly explained to her that she has to tell me that she will pay something out loud or the field collector will disconnect. She hesitated, 'But I can't lie, I'm sorry, you'll have to cut me off'. She passed the phone over to the collector, and I said'Hey bud, pass this one by, as a favor, please?'. Sure, it's your head dude, and he left her on. I talked to Lucia for a good 45 minutes about how she cleans bed pans, makes food and cleaned the house for a month and then got stiffed on her pay. Twice. Same employer, though, as he ran a motel and had her clean rooms. She was surviving on meager room tips. She has an extra month of electricity but that's all that can be done.

Esther, an older Wisconsin customer, called to complain about the low income rider that is on each and every electric bill in Wisconsin. 'Why do I have to pay for some fucking lazy Obama n****r so they can turn their furnace up to 80 and laugh at me'. After warning her about abusive language, I told her that it seemed to be a program that worked. After all, I noted, no one has frozen to death in their homes here. Esther blasted back 'Maybe they should freeze to death, that would get them off their assholes'. I am forbidden to hang up on a customer but did so without hesitation.

Kaycee, a young married mother who lives in Wisconsin with 3 kids and a husband who works for 10.00 an hour. Kaycee told me she loved energy assistance, 'cause she paid some and the agency paid some, 'I don't like just free energy, I like to pay some.' We started talking about Badgercare, the free socialized medical insurance for low income working families in Wisconsin and how grateful we both were to live in Wisconsin. Then she told me something that hit home. She just starting recieving foodstamps, like myself, and she told me,'For the first time, I felt like I could go and buy fresh veggies and fruits. They were always a little too expensive before foodstamps and WIC. We are eating healthier than ever.' I admitted the same.

Life on the sharp end. Nobody is nickeling and dimeing us, they're gouging us hard-shitty wages, bank fees, and crappy landlords. And here's to endless unemployment checks for surviving this recession, 'cause people are drowning and starting to drown. We need as much protection out there as possible, 'cause there's a growing fringe that would just as well see us dead.

Update*thanks for all who care for the least fortunate among us. Peace to all who are suffering this day. Peace and hope.