A survey shows the US president’s similarly named golf course and hotel is deterring people from caravanning at Turnberry holiday park

Name: Turnberry Holiday Park (for now).

Location: Girvan, Ayrshire.

Appearance: A static caravan park set within “the tranquillity of Scotland’s south-west coast”. It looks out across the sea towards the Mull of Kintyre.

One of my top five favourite mulls, no question. Paul McCartney was dead right. You must let him know, I’m sure he’d be delighted. Plus Girvan is famous for the historic Turnberry golf course, one of the links courses that hosts the Open Championship.

Ah, yes. Didn’t Donald Trump buy that place a few years ago? Yes, in 2014. He has since spent more than £100m on it, and it is still losing millions.

Jolly good. I didn’t realise he had gone into the static caravan business, too. He hasn’t! You’re confusing the Turnberry holiday park with the Trump Turnberry golf resort, which is two miles up the coast.

Are they different places? Very different. Right now, it would be cheaper to rent a caravan for six people for a week at Turnberry holiday park (£280) than for one person to play a single round of golf at the Turnberry’s Ailsa course (£325-375).

I see. So, they’re pitched at different markets. You could say that. Still, to avoid confusion, the owners of the caravan park are considering changing the name.

Why? It’s a brand issue, mainly. A few years ago, golf fans all over the world associated Turnberry with ancient coastal splendour. It was the scene of the famous final-round duel between Jack Nicklaus and Tom Watson in the 1977 Open.

And now? Now they associate it with being orange and unhinged.

So, a trailer park is worried that a luxury golf resort might give it a bad reputation? That’s about the size of it. Bridge Leisure, which owns the caravan park, surveyed 1,000 people and found that 32% said they would be less likely to visit a place called “Turnberry holiday park”.

Oh dear. “There’s no doubt there’s a negative element because of the Donald,” says Andrew Howe, chief executive of Bridge Leisure. “It’s a competitive marketplace. We’re worrying about doing anything that might put people off.”

Did Howe say what name might be used instead? He didn’t. But a decision is expected in a couple of weeks.

How about the Robert Mueller holiday park? I’m sure they’ll consider it.

Do say: “Breathe the sea air while you and the family enjoy the wealth of local opportunities for political protest.”

Don’t say: “When I said I wanted ‘golf links’, this wasn’t what I had in mind.”