Imagine for a moment that you are George RR Martin. You have spent almost three decades toiling away at the work destined to become your legacy. You have used millions of words to tell an epic, sweeping story with a cast of thousands that forms the basis of the biggest television series on the planet. The rewards have been great, but the weight of expectation was enormous. Nevertheless, you are comfortable in the knowledge that this will for ever be known as your gift to the world.



And then Donald Trump tweets a poster.

That’s it. That is all anyone will ever remember of Game of Thrones now. A weird Photoshop mock-up of Trump and the words: “Sanctions are coming.” And the poster he physically took to a cabinet meeting. And the follow-up poster, this time reading: “The wall is coming.”

And that’s it. That’s Game of Thrones done. It would be the same if Richard Nixon had tweeted a Columbo poster emblazoned with the catchphrase: “Just one more thing … we’re stepping up covert operations in Cuba,” or if Dwight D Eisenhower had tweeted a poster of Zorro Rides Again with the slogan “Bold As His Blade! Wild As His Whip! Don’t forget, I recently signed the Sino-American mutual defense treaty!” In time, those works would also become known for their political affiliation rather than their entertainment factor too.

And that would be fine, bar the fact that Trump has very clearly never seen a single second of Game of Thrones. This is evident for two reasons. First, we have seen time and time again that Trump is incapable of watching a television programme without tweeting about it, and he does not appear to have ever tweeted about Game of Thrones in a non-meme capacity.

But more importantly, he has got it all wrong. Even a child knows what “winter is coming” means at this stage. It is a dire warning that the world is on the brink of apocalyptic climate change, and that men should work together in union rather than indulge in petty power squabbles. So, in essence, “winter” is the exact scientific opposite of “sanctions”.

Then there’s the wall tweet. This is the one that’s apparently closer to Trump’s heart, since yesterday he spoke to all of America from the Oval Office about it. It also happens to be closer to the spirit of Game of Thrones. Yes, sure, we’ve just seen it get smashed to bits by a zombie dragon and its undead army by now, but that isn’t the point. The point is that Game of Throne’s wall was built as a measure of extreme border security, and it stood for 8,000 years before falling, and Winterfell has got a wall around it, and that’s exactly the same thing.

Except, wait, what was it that the Lord Commander of the Night’s Watch, Jeor Mormont, told Samwell Tarly in A Storm of Swords? “You don’t build a wall 700ft high to keep savages in skins from stealing women. The Wall was made to guard the realms of men … and not against other men, which is all the Wildlings are.”



That’s right. The Wall was not built to keep out unappealing neighbours; it was designed to hold off an unkillable army of magic zombies who lurk beyond the Wildlings. So, unless there happens to be a murderous horde of frozen monsters in, say, Guatemala, this poster does not carry much weight either.

‘The Wall was designed to hold off an unkillable army of magic zombies who lurk beyond the Wildlings.’ Photograph: HBO

But perhaps all is not lost for Game of Thrones. If Trump can play fast and loose with HBO’s intellectual property, then perhaps it should return the favour. The final series of Game of Thrones is just weeks away, and what better way to promote it than by tweeting posters of characters alongside well-known Trump quotes?

Maybe Bran Stark with: “Sorry losers and haters, but my IQ is one of the highest.” Or a massive image of the White Walkers, and the tagline: “They’re bringing drugs. They’re bringing crime. They’re rapists. And some, I assume, are good people.” Or perhaps: “Nobody builds better walls than me, believe me,” accompanied by an image of the dragon Viserion doing his thing. Have at it, HBO.