Men have no monopoly on being predatory sexual abusers with no conscience.

Within days of telling her patient the “life-altering” news that he had cancer, Dr. Theepa Sundaralingam was flirting, sexting and eventually having sex with him, in his home, her clinic and even his hospital bed.

And then at his most vulnerable, the oncologist told him she was in love with someone else. Sundaralingam dumped him and refused to see him.

“I was physically emaciated and emotionally exposed and the loss of a critical relationship defeated me,” he explained in his victim impact statement to the College of Physicians and Surgeons (CPSO) Wednesday. “What compounded this toll was her refusal to continue providing medical care at the same time.”

Now this slip of a woman with a tissue crushed in her hand pleads no contest before the disciplinary panel.

“Your actions are abhorrent and reprehensible,” Sundaralingam is told. “You crossed boundaries and ultimately sexually abused an extremely vulnerable patient suffering from a life-threatening illness.”

As they strip her of her medical licence, the 37-year-old betrays no emotion at all.

The patient — his name and age protected by a publication ban — was referred to Sundaralingam from the emergency room. The oncologist ordered bone marrow testing and delivered the bad news at his follow-up appointment: He had cancer.

The patient — his name and age protected by a publication ban — was referred to Sundaralingam from the emergency room. The oncologist ordered bone marrow testing and delivered the bad news at his follow-up appointment: He hThe next day, Sundaralingam gave him her personal contact information and Instagram ID. They began exchanging flirtatious messages and a few days later, met at the coffee shop outside her clinic. “Sundaralingam continued to breach appropriate boundaries with Patient A including by … holding hands with Patient A, hugging Patient A for long periods of time and kissing Patient A,” CPSO prosecutor Amy Block said, reading from the uncontested statement of facts.

“At the time, I was unable to see the ramifications of dating my treating oncologist,” the patient wrote in his victim impact statement. “I couldn’t see how vulnerable I was and how much power she had over me.”

She treated him 23 times between January and July 2015 and once in March 2016.

In March 2015, he was admitted to hospital for chemotherapy and Sundaralingam would visit for five to seven hours. “His entire family got to know her,” the prosecutor said. “During these visits, the discussions between Dr. Sundaralingam and Patient A became more sexually explicit, including discussions about the pornography they enjoy.”

During one visit, she crawled into bed with him where they “engaged in mutual sexual touching.”

After his release, she continued to treat him at her clinic where “Sundaralingam behaved in a physical, flirty and sexual manner toward Patient A.” She also came to the home he shared with his parents and spent hours with him in his bedroom.ad cancer.

In July 2015, when Patient A was admitted for a bone marrow transplant, Sundaralingam would sleep over. “They had sexual intercourse on two occasions while he was an inpatient,” Block said.

“This was not an isolated incident or momentary lapse of judgment, ” the disciplinary panel ruled. Sundaralingam knew sex with a patient is considered sexual abuse and carries a mandatory licence revocation. She repeatedly asked Patient A to delete their texts and keep their relationship a secret. She also asked him to scratch out her name on the hospital’s visitor log.

At the end of September 2015, Sundaralingam had intercourse with him one final time. Shen then told him she was in love with a colleague with whom she was having an affair.

And just like that, it was over. But not for him.

“It’s difficult for me to talk to anybody about it,” he wrote. “For me to say, ‘Hey, I dated my oncologist,’ I wouldn’t be a surprise for someone to say, ‘Cool.’ But that’s not cool. That’s not the case because I feel abused, and it’s very difficult as a male to come out and say that about a female. It’s usually the other way around.”

He will survive, he vowed. “Just as I fought through my cancer, I am fighting through this traumatic experience.”

As a physician, Sundaralingam had pledged to do no harm. What in the world was she thinking? All those years of study and training — a medical degree and oncology fellowship at UofT, finally hanging her shingle at a Toronto hospital in 2012 — and just over six years later, her career is over.

mmandel@postmedia.com