columbine - tragedy and recovery

Shoelses' letter to the president

By The Denver Post

May 21 - Here is the text of a letter that Vonda and Michael Shoels, parents of slain Columbine High School student Isaiah Shoels, gave to President l Clinton on Thursday:

We appreciate you and your wife taking the time to visit with us today. These are the most difficult and painful days of our lives. Over and over we ask "Why? Why our Isaiah? Why should anyone's child have to suffer such a horrific death?'

Well Mr. President, after much prayer and worldwide support, we are compelled to share a moment of Isaiah's life with you. On Saturday April 17, 1999, less than 72 hours before our son was assassinated in Columbine High School, our family was riding in our van when Isaiah asked us "What would you do if I was gunned down? Would you get the people who killed me?'

Mr. President, we are stunned, uneasy and scared. Understand, our house had already been under attack. Rocks had been thrown through windows; doors had been kicked in, all under the cover of darkness. All of our children (Michelle, Anthony and Isaiah) attending Columbine had been the subjected to language of hate (called "niggers'') while on school premises. There was no positive intervention. Still, we told Isaiah that we would not engage in violence of any kind against anyone. But, we promised Isaiah that we would "speak out.'

It is because of our commitment to Isaiah, Mr. President, that we ask you to join us in our crusade against violence and hate. We must not take simplistic approaches to problem solving. Those who killed our son should not have had access to the weapons they used. Clearly, guns were a contributing factor. Guns are not, however, the central issue. It was a vile hatred for fellow human beings of all colors, which actually pulled the trigger and detonated the hate bombs. It is no coincidence that the heinous acts occurred on Hitler's birthday.

Mr. President, we must stop sugarcoating the issues that make us uncomfortable. We must move way beyond the community and national denial of the pervasive nature of hate, racism and anti-Semitic feelings that have infiltrated the mindset of too many of our young people. Until we challenge the hatred that is the foundation of violent acts, we will be in a holding pattern for more Columbines. America and the world deserves better.

We must take back our parenthood responsibilities. We must not let TV, video games, violence-laden movies and Internet-techno-hatemongers baby-sit our children. We must teach our children the difference between right and wrong. Parents must know what their children are doing. Parents must know who their children are hanging out with. School administrators, teachers, parents and law-enforcement authorities must be sensitized to the language of hate, which is often followed with acts of violence.

Mr. President, it was not too long ago that you asked the American people to forgive you. We forgave you. We have high expectations of you. We must demonstrate by our actions that violence is not America's bottom line problem-solving solution. Our children are always watching us. Those who made pipe bombs may well have cheered your bombs dropping over Kosovo and Yugoslavia. There is a connection.

We do not seek to embarrass you, but violence must not be America's ultimate problem solving solution. For our children's sake, we must lead by example.

It is not easy, but we even find forgiveness for those who took the life of a wonderful young man, our Isaiah. Oh, if we could have only spoken with those young men before they killed. We believe we could have prevented their inhumane actions. They needed someone. Now all we can do is forgive and work to prevent others from behaving in such a terrible manner.

Even as we forgive, we know that as a leader of our nation, you must take strong measures to help prevent another Columbine. We trust that you will include youth and parents in your efforts to combat violence and hate. Too many so-called "experts'' and throwing dollars in high media profile gestures will not change a thing. We offer ourselves to help you in the selection of those who will sit on national commissions and task forces because you need input from those of us who are at ground zero.

We also respectfully request your assistance in helping us secure another place to live so that we might lead a normal family life again. While assistance to date has been somewhat helpful, we would appreciate the same disaster-relief approach afforded victims of a hurricane, tornado or earthquake because the devastation of hate in our lives has been so total. We just want to function as a family again.

With Love and Respect, Vonda and Michael Shoels