Survey Finds Women More Likely To Propose Open Relationships

A New Study Says Women Are More Likely To Initiate An Open Relationship

Long Story Short

The lady in your life may not be as opposed to spicing things up as you’d think. OpenMinded.com, a site for people looking for open relationships, surveyed their members and found something surprising: Of the couples in open relationships, two-thirds were initiated by women. This seemingly dispels the notion that it’s primarily men who want extramarital partners.

Long Story

As someone existing in a happy, plain-vanilla marriage, I do not get polyamory. The promise of getting some strange on the side does not, for me, offset the theoretical headache that would come with having an extra significant other. But then again, it’s not really for me to “get”. Some people have clandestine extramarital affairs, which just about everyone condemns as immoral. But some couples, be it a proclivity or a last-ditch effort to “save” a relationship, willingly engage in sex with people other than their dedicated partners. What may surprise you is that, if open relationship site OpenMinded.com is to be believed, the majority of those open relationships were initiated by the women.

OpenMinded says they surveyed over 64,000 couples registered to use their site. Of the couples engaging in open relationships, two-thirds of them say it was the woman’s idea. If true, this flies in the face of the conventional wisdom that says men are the ones who can’t bear the idea of sleeping with the same person until death do them part.

According to the site’s founder, it may be that women aren’t into three-ways so much as they’re into preserving their relationships at all costs. Women can sense when a relationship isn’t working, and with the rise of acceptance for non-monogamy is causing them to try out less traditional ideals,” explained Founder and CEO, Brandon Wade. “It’s not that their partners aren’t fulfilling, it’s more about rekindling relationships that aren’t working. Men often step out, and women take a step inward and let an open relationship bring them closer.

Again, this all sounds like hooey to me, less like an open relationship and more like “condoned” cheating. But given that swinging and other forms of polyamory have been around more or less forever, there have to be some couples who genuinely (and mutually) prefer a more open arrangement. Some people just want to see the people they love the most as happy as possible. Some people genuinely believe monogamy to be unnatural.

As long as everything’s on the up-and-up, it’s hard to fault people for doing what makes them happy. That said, don’t be surprised if proposing the introduction of another woman into the bedroom is received less than enthusiastically by your wife or girlfriend.

Own The Conversation

Ask The Big Question

Can you really call it a marriage without exclusivity?

Disrupt Your Feed

I recommend sharing this with your S.O. and then just waiting to see what happens.

Drop This Fact

One-third of all married people report cheating on their spouse, but only 5% of couples identify as being in an open relationship.