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--> A midday take on what's happening in politics and how to have a sense of humor about it.*

*Ha. Haha. Hahah. Sniff. Haha. Sniff. Ha--breaks down crying hysterically.

The Hill's 12:30 Report: Conservative backlash over budget deal | White House defends plan | What's in the two-year budget numbers | Senate confirms Esper as Pentagon chief | Dems launch messaging blitz ahead of Mueller testimony | What to know for Mueller hearings | How Mueller could leave both sides frustrated | Trump says he will watch a 'little bit' | DC bars opening early for hearings | Face of NASA mission control dies at 95 | One year until Tokyo Olympics | When pets learn to play pranks

TOMORROW'S MUELLER TESTIMONY

Tbh, both sides have built this up too much in their heads:

Via The Hill's Scott Wong, Mike Lillis and Morgan Chalfant, former special counsel Robert Mueller Robert (Bob) MuellerCNN's Toobin warns McCabe is in 'perilous condition' with emboldened Trump CNN anchor rips Trump over Stone while evoking Clinton-Lynch tarmac meeting The Hill's 12:30 Report: New Hampshire fallout MORE's testimony could easily be frustrating for both Democrats and Republicans who have been anxiously waiting to hear from him. http://bit.ly/2JLDyJ5

What Democrats want out of tomorrow's hearings: "Democrats want Mueller to breathe life into his 448-page report and demonstrate to the American public that Trump is guilty of obstructing his investigation -- a verdict Mueller's team purposely avoided in issuing its findings."

What Republicans want out of tomorrow's hearings: "Republicans will try to throw Mueller off his game, vowing to focus their questions on whether it was even proper to launch the investigation in the first place."

Why both sides may not achieve their goals: Robert Mueller has testified on Capitol Hill 88 times (!) over the course of his career and knows what he is doing. He does not want his decades-long reputation to be politicized and will be extremely careful in being nonpartisan.

^ I.e.: "Anyone looking for a sequel to former FBI Director James Comey James Brien ComeySteele Dossier sub-source was subject of FBI counterintelligence probe Judge will not dismiss McCabe's case against DOJ Democrats fear Russia interference could spoil bid to retake Senate MORE's testimony after he was fired by Trump in 2017 is likely to be disappointed."

What to know about Mueller's 88 trips to Capitol Hill: https://nyti.ms/2JLu40l

It's Tuesday. I'm Cate Martel with a quick recap of the morning and what's coming up. Send comments, story ideas and events for our radar to cmartel@thehill.com -- and follow along on Twitter @CateMartel and Facebook.

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STARTING TODAY -- DEMOCRATS LAUNCH MUELLER MESSAGING CAMPAIGN:

"House Democrats on Tuesday will launch an aggressive communications campaign to highlight Robert Mueller's sweeping investigation into Russian election interference just ahead of the former special counsel's appearance before Congress for a pair of hotly anticipated hearings." http://bit.ly/2M6fVg0

FROM THE WHITE HOUSE:

The Department of Justice is getting involved: The DOJ told Mueller to limit his testimony to what is in the public report. From the DOJ: http://bit.ly/2M3YXP8

Oh, sure I believe this: "No, I'm not going to be watching," Trump said of the testimony. "Probably, maybe I'll see a little bit of it ... I'm not going to be watching Mueller because you can't take all those bites out of the apple." https://nbcnews.to/2M6mizW

LOGISTICS:

First hearing -- 8:30 a.m. EDT: Mueller testifies before the House Judiciary Committee. Livestream: https://cs.pn/2JKSyXK

Hearing location: Rayburn House Office Building, Room 2141. Details from the Judiciary Committee's site: http://bit.ly/2Ye3LYX

Second hearing -- Noon: Mueller testifies before the House Intelligence Committee. Livestream: https://cs.pn/2JKSyXK

Hearing location: Also in Rayburn 2141. Details from the Intelligence Committee's site: http://bit.ly/2YlGUdS

IF YOU WANT A REFRESHER:

Here's the full Mueller report: https://cnn.it/2JK9QEg

Or if this is more your style -- listen to the Mueller report: https://cs.pn/2M7sWGb

10 things to watch: Via CNN's Jeremy Herb: https://cnn.it/2JLQw9I

IF YOU'RE IN D.C.:

Obviously bars are opening early for this: Here's a list of bars in the Washington, D.C., area that are opening early for the Mueller hearings. Thanks, DCist: http://bit.ly/2JMi1A8

IN CONGRESS

How nice of you to join:

Via Politico's Burgess Everett, Treasury Secretary Steven Mnuchin Steven Terner MnuchinOn The Money: Anxious Democrats push for vote on COVID-19 aid | Pelosi, Mnuchin ready to restart talks | Weekly jobless claims increase | Senate treads close to shutdown deadline Vulnerable Democrats tell Pelosi COVID-19 compromise 'essential' Pelosi asks panels to draft new COVID-19 relief measure MORE is attending the Senate Republican lunch today. http://bit.ly/2M8KCRu

Why: To sell Republicans on the budget deal he worked out with Speaker Nancy Pelosi Nancy PelosiPelosi slams Trump executive order on pre-existing conditions: It 'isn't worth the paper it's signed on' On The Money: Anxious Democrats push for vote on COVID-19 aid | Pelosi, Mnuchin ready to restart talks | Weekly jobless claims increase | Senate treads close to shutdown deadline Trump signs largely symbolic pre-existing conditions order amid lawsuit MORE (D-Calif.).

WHY MNUCHIN REALLY HAS TO SELL THIS BUDGET DEAL:

The two-year budget deal worked out between the White House and Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif.) is facing strong pushback from conservatives and budget hawks.

For example -- from Rep. Mark Walker Bradley (Mark) Mark WalkerJoe Biden has long forgotten North Carolina: Today's visit is too late Mike Johnson to run for vice chairman of House GOP conference The Hill's Morning Report - Sponsored by National Industries for the Blind - Woodward book revelations rock Washington MORE (R-N.C.): "Our credit card is maxed out. What this budget deal does is ask the credit card company for another $320 billion in credit NOW for the chance to get paid back $75 billion in a decade. No bank would take that. American taxpayers shouldn't either." He also tweeted a gif of the Joker burning cash: http://bit.ly/2M1UWLg

By the way: The Committee for a Responsible Federal Budget (CRFB) estimated that this deal could add $2 trillion to deficits over the next 10 years. http://bit.ly/2M9dCZl

THE WHITE HOUSE'S DEFENSE:

From National Economic Council Director Larry Kudlow Larry KudlowMORE: "I think it's a deal that will get through. I think people are signing on -- Democrats and Republicans. It isn't everything we hoped for, but it got through the debt ceiling. That's so important." http://bit.ly/2M9kJB1

Just now — Trump’s defense secretary is confirmed:

The Senate just voted to confirm Mark Esper as Defense Secretary. http://bit.ly/2McosOB

Keep in mind: “The confirmation of Esper makes him the first Senate-approved Defense secretary since late December.”

What to know about Esper’s confirmation: http://bit.ly/2McosOB

Happening today -- pulling down the curtain:

Via The Hill's Cristina Marcos, "The House is slated to pass legislation Tuesday to oppose the global boycott movement against Israel, a vote that will put a spotlight both on Democratic divisions and Rep. Ilhan Omar Ilhan OmarOmar fires back at Trump over rally remarks: 'This is my country' Trump attacks Omar for criticizing US: 'How did you do where you came from?' Democrats scramble on COVID-19 relief amid division, Trump surprise MORE (D-Minn.)." http://bit.ly/2M3VYGq

Where most Democrats stand: "Most Democrats in the House oppose the boycott, divestment and sanctions (BDS) movement, an international campaign meant to exert pressure on Israel over treatment of the Palestinians. Critics say it would isolate and harm Israel, which retains strong support in Congress from both parties."

ON THE CAMPAIGN TRAIL

This looks exhausting:

The New York Times broke down how to get a photo with Sen. Elizabeth Warren Elizabeth WarrenHillicon Valley: Subpoenas for Facebook, Google and Twitter on the cards | Wray rebuffs mail-in voting conspiracies | Reps. raise mass surveillance concerns On The Money: Anxious Democrats push for vote on COVID-19 aid | Pelosi, Mnuchin ready to restart talks | Weekly jobless claims increase | Senate treads close to shutdown deadline Democratic senators ask inspector general to investigate IRS use of location tracking service MORE (D-Mass.) on the campaign trail. https://nyti.ms/2JJVcNs

How many pictures Warren has taken: Her campaign estimates that she has taken photos with more than 38,000 people.

Yikes -- How much time Warren has spent taking pictures with supporters: "Warren's campaign estimates that she has spent about 107 hours taking pictures in selfie lines since entering the race -- the equivalent of working 9-to-5 for 13 days. At one event in Iowa, she continued posing for pictures in the midst of a tornado warning."

Check out this graphic showing the assembly line of taking a photo: It involves eight steps involving high-level campaign staff: https://nyti.ms/2JJVcNs

IN OTHER NEWS

The face of NASA's mission control died two days after the Apollo 11 anniversary:

Via The New York Times's Robert D. McFadden, "Christopher C. Kraft Jr., the legendary founder of NASA's mission control, who directed America's first piloted orbital flights, oversaw the Apollo 11 lunar landing and was director of the Johnson Space Center in Houston, died on Monday in Houston, two days after the 50th anniversary of that historic moment on the moon. He was 95." Read his obituary: https://nyti.ms/2M8oK90

NOTABLE TWEETS

Tidbit about the guards outside the White House:

TIL - The Marines that stand guard outside the West Wing use anti-fatigue mats. pic.twitter.com/zxB8UYTyYL — Graham MacGillivray (@GWMacGillivray) July 22, 2019

Watch: http://bit.ly/2M1HAP8

Wow, seriously!:

SOMEBODY SIGN THIS REF pic.twitter.com/altZmtdMpA — Yoni (@OriginalYoni) July 22, 2019

Watch: http://bit.ly/2MaPBkL

ON TAP

The House and Senate are in.

9:45 a.m. EDT: Vice President Pence met with governors in Aspen, Colo. He then attended the Republican Governors Association quarterly meeting.

Noon: The Senate votes to confirm Mark Esper to be Defense Secretary. The Senate's full schedule today: http://bit.ly/2JM871q

12:30 p.m. EDT: President Trump Donald John TrumpSteele Dossier sub-source was subject of FBI counterintelligence probe Pelosi slams Trump executive order on pre-existing conditions: It 'isn't worth the paper it's signed on' Trump 'no longer angry' at Romney because of Supreme Court stance MORE has lunch with Secretary of State Mike Pompeo Michael (Mike) Richard PompeoPutin nominated for Nobel Peace Prize The Hill's Morning Report - Sponsored by Facebook - Trump previews SCOTUS nominee as 'totally brilliant' Pompeo accused of stumping for Trump ahead of election MORE.

1:30 p.m. EDT: Vice President Pence lands in Des Moines, Iowa.

1:45 p.m. EDT: President Trump receives an intelligence briefing.

2:30 p.m. EDT: The Senate votes.

4 p.m. EDT: President Trump meets with Senate Republicans.

6:25 p.m. EDT: Vice President Pence gets back to Washington, D.C.

6:30 p.m. EDT: The House votes. The House's full schedule today: http://bit.ly/2JIUIad

July 24: The Hill is hosting the third annual Latino Leaders Summit. Details and how to RSVP: http://bit.ly/2lKv6jR

July 25: The Hill interviews Sens. Sens. Mike Braun Michael BraunPessimism grows as hopes fade for coronavirus deal McConnell shores up GOP support for coronavirus package Patient Protection Pledge offers price transparency MORE (R-Ind.) and Tammy Baldwin Tammy Suzanne BaldwinSenators introduce bipartisan bill to mandate digital apps disclose country of origin Keep teachers in the classroom Cher raised million for Biden campaign at LGBTQ-themed fundraiser MORE (D-Wis.) during an event on lowering drug prices. Details and how to RSVP: http://bit.ly/2Yn2RJq

WHAT TO WATCH

11:05 a.m. EDT: President Trump speaks at Turning Point USA's Teen Student Action Summit at the Marriott Marquis in Washington, D.C. Livestream: http://bit.ly/2M6855R

2:45 p.m. EDT: Vice President Pence gives a speech on trade in Des Moines, Iowa. Livestream: http://bit.ly/2M67aCx

NOW FOR THE FUN STUFF...

Today is National Vanilla Ice Cream Day!

Dunnn, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun:

The 2020 Summer Olympics in Tokyo kick off a year from tomorrow. The dates: July 24–Aug. 9. http://bit.ly/2M6n2oI

And because this is the best video I've seen in weeks, here's a video of two dogs planning a prank: http://bit.ly/2M69B81

It has nearly 8 million views so far.