You’re a Yankees fan, and you’re biding your time until the playoffs, because nothing else matters.

You’re a Mets fan, and you’re more bitter than a grapefruit left out in the sun.

You’re a Marlins fan and … just kidding. We all know there’s no such thing as a Marlins fan.

Why pay attention to baseball’s second half? Here, with New York bias fully implemented, are the game’s top 10 second-half storylines:

1. Yankees’ arms search

Recall the handful of concerns they brought with them into the season. Too strikeout-prone? Greatly improved, thanks partly to Giancarlo Stanton’s multiple lengthy stays on the injured list. Too right-handed? They lead the majors with an .829 OPS against righty pitchers. Soft? Not after enduring a massive injury epidemic and emerging with the AL’s best record at the break.

In need of high-end starting pitching? Yup, some work definitely remains there. Can the Yankees upgrade their rotation — or at least their bullpen, in the hopes of further shortening the game — by the July 31 trade deadline? You know by now the obvious names: Trevor Bauer, Matthew Boyd, Madison Bumgarner and Marcus Stroman, with Luis Severino hoping to return from the injured list. As does Dellin Betances, with All-Stars Shane Greene, Brad Hand and Will Smith topping the list of potentially available relievers.

“Yeah, we set ourselves up to have a pretty good second half,” the retiring CC Sabathia said Tuesday night, following the All-Star Game in Cleveland. “We’ve played really well. We’ve dealt with a lot of adversity. Hopefully we’ll just keep going and this guy [Gleyber Torres, who stepped past Sabathia at that moment] can carry us to a World Series.” It’ll help a lot if they can hold onto their 6 ½-game AL East lead over the Rays to capture their first division title since (gulp) 2012.

2. Pete Alonso

The first step will be to avoid the post-Home Run Derby curse that plagued past competitors like Bobby Abreu (2005), David Wright (2006) and Aaron Judge, who acknowledged after the fact that he seriously injured his left shoulder while winning the 2017 Derby. Alonso, $900,000 million richer thanks to his Derby triumph (he’s donating 10 percent of his $1 million prize to charity), has an NL Rookie of the Year trophy to earn, and the competition, including the Padres’ Fernando Tatis Jr. and the Braves’ Mike Soroka, looks fierce.

The second step will be to maintain his good cheer and that of the Mets’ loyalists who hate their owners, their general manager, their manager and most of their players. Can a polar bear thrive amidst egregious incompetence in his environment? This one has so far.

“I’m looking to make the most of this and enjoy everything,” Alonso said Monday afternoon of the Derby. With trades of veterans such as Todd Frazier, Jason Vargas and Zack Wheeler likely coming, Alonso’s challenge to do the same for his first major league season will only increase.

3. The balls and the blasts

Rob Manfred played more defense this past week than David Ortiz did over the entirety of his 20-year career. The commissioner repeatedly stated, as patiently as his fiery-labor-lawyer disposition would allow him, that no, the owners hadn’t intentionally juiced the balls to create more homers, and yes, he appreciated the need to control this process better moving forward to quell excessive long balls and appease pitchers.

In explaining how this can be controlled, Manfred said, “It’s all about the data,” the information gleaned from studies. In the short term, the data of home run records being destroyed will be painful.

4. The Red Sox’s hangover

At 49-41, nine games behind the Yankees and two behind the Indians for the second AL wild-card spot, Boston stands 12 games worse than last year at this time. It starts the second half on a four-game winning streak. Can the defending champions finally get going, or will they replicate their 2019 pattern heretofore of swaying to and fro? The AL wild-card race, meanwhile, could captivate — with the Bosox, the mighty Rays, the Indians (who clearly are looking to trade Bauer and still contend) and last year’s darlings the A’s battling for two spots.

5. The batting titles

Batting average long ago lost its spot, deservedly, on Mount Rushmore. OPS — or even better OPS+ or wRC+ — tell a more complete story.

Nevertheless, the Big Apple rises of the Mets’ Jeff McNeil, who leads the majors with a .349 batting average, and the Yankees’ DJ LeMahieu, who tops the AL at .336, has provided a pleasing, old-school contrast to the obsession with launch angle and reminded us of the value of making contact.

“I think it kind of brings it back to what it was,” the Rockies’ Nolan Arenado, LeMahieu’s former teammate, said Monday. “Line-drive hitters, guys hitting for average. For a while there, it was like, ‘Average is kind of whatever.’ But it is important. That’s your leadoff hitter that’s getting on base at a high clip like that, that’s what you need.”

The batting title never has listed sole occupancy in New York (thanks, baseball-reference.com). Can McNeil and LeMahieu pull it off?

6. Vladdy Jr.

Alonso earned the Derby crown over Vladimir Guerrero Jr. fair and square, yet Guerrero’s 91 homers and triple-overtime semifinal victory over Joc Pederson, compared to 57 bombs by Alonso, might ultimately win the night. Can the rookie prodigy, who has played only adequately in the big leagues so far (a .249/.328/.413 slash line), build on his break to win AL honors?

7. The Beach Boys

The Angels’ Mike Trout and the Dodgers’ Cody Bellinger arguably lead the battles for their respective leagues’ MVP honors. Only one other time has the MVP trophy listed sole occupancy in Southern California: Trout and Bellinger’s current Dodgers teammate Clayton Kershaw pulled it off in 2014.

Bellinger must hold off the Brewers’ Christian Yelich, last year’s NL MVP, whereas Trout probably just has to stay healthy.

8. Trade deadline

We’ve already touched on most of the big names as well as the most compelling team, the Indians. Let’s not forget the other compelling element of this deadline, though: For the first time, it’s pencils down on July 31. No more waivers trades in August. That surely will spur some unanticipated creativity in clubs. And I’m fascinated to see what sort of tricks teams try to pull in August — Surprise releases? Guys coming out of retirement? — to stack their rosters for the stretch run and beyond.

9. The NL Central

The Reds, at 41-46, reside in last place. They’re three games behind the division-leading Cubs (47-43) in the loss column, 4 ½ games overall — with the Brewers (47-44), Cardinals (44-44) and Pirates (44-45) bridging the gap. That is one tight division. The NL wild-card race, moreover, features every team within 4½ games besides the Giants, Mets and Marlins.

10. Farewells

Sabathia, who announced his retirement as soon as he re-signed with the Yankees last November, has enjoyed an industry-wide tribute. His former Yankees teammate Curtis Granderson made no such announcement and has played his way onto the Marlins’ bench. Here’s hoping he has one more Jason Voorhees-esque rebound left in him.

Revered Giants manager Bruce Bochy, with a new boss in Farhan Zaidi, jumped before he could be pushed with a preseason declaration, and though he isn’t calling this a retirement, it very well might be. And if the Cubs don’t figure things out, will skipper Joe Maddon find himself looking for work at age 65 when younger managers are en vogue?