



THOSE afraid of marital commitment may just have another reason to justify their actions as, while it may be generally believed that married people are happier and healthier than single people, a recent study has found that marriages can also be the most significant source of long-lasting depression.







The study, conducted by researchers at the University of Wisconsin-Madison and published in the April 2014 Journal of Psychophysiology, found that not is all is wedded bliss as marital stress has been linked to depression.







The long-term study (over 13 years), showed that people who experience chronic marital stress are less able to savour positive experiences (one of the signs of depression), while they are also more likely to report other depressive symptoms.







Dr Barry Davidson, clinical psychologist and marriage counsellor at Family Life Ministries, agreed that marriage can indeed result in depression.







"As a result of not being properly prepared for marriage you could very well end up being depressed," Dr Davidson said.







"Before people get married, whether they realise it or not, they are wearing a mask because they are doing their best to impress the other person. So each person is putting their best foot forward. After you get married these masks come off, so you have the real male now relating to the real female. If there is a major difference between the person you thought you married and the person you now discover you married, then you are likely to become depressed."



Dr Davidson said what will then happen is that the disappointed spouse will find themselves grieving over the loss of the person they thought they married, when the reality is that they are with somebody they probably don't even like.







"The first stage of grief is usually shock," he said. "You can't believe that this person is not really who you thought he/she was. What follows the shock stage is anger. You are angry with the person because you feel the person wasn't true to you; the person was deceptive, and the person was a great pretender. And you are also angry with yourself for not having picked up on certain cues that might have been there all along but you thought you could either overlook or change."







He explained that it is this anger that usually leads to depression.







Depression can also come about during certain stages of the marriage.







"The first stage of a marriage is what is called the honeymoon stage," Dr Davidson explained. "And that is when everything seems fine -- sex is great, romance is fantastic, etc. But what follows that stage is the adjustment stage. And the adjustment stage can be very difficult because you now find that you are adjusting to somebody who, for example, does not like to bathe, or who you now discover is very selfish or comes home late at night and you are lonely."







He said this adjustment stage can cause a lot of conflict which can in turn create stress.







"Then you move from adjustment to reality and the reality stage is where you realise that love alone won't solve problems and problems are there to be solved," he said.







"Love won't pay light bills and water bills. Love won't take you to supermarket. So the reality is that we need money and if that is not forthcoming and it becomes a problem then that could lead to you becoming extremely depressed."







Dr Davidson said after the reality stage comes the conflict stage and if these conflicts cannot be resolved, persons move into a stress stage.







"And all of these stages can cause persons to feel depressed," he said.







The researchers said the findings of the study are important because they could help them to understand what makes some people more vulnerable to mental and emotional health challenges and may also help scientists develop tools to prevent them.







"This is not an obvious consequence, if you will, of marital stress, but it's one I think that is extraordinarily important because of the cascade of changes that may be associated," said study leader Richard Davidson.







Participants in the study were asked questions like how often they felt let down by their partner or how frequently their spouse criticised them. They were also evaluated for depression.







Study participants who reported higher marital stress had shorter-lived responses to positive images than those reporting more satisfaction in their unions. There was no significant difference in the timing of negative responses.



