The losers are angry...

Hillary, Tim Kaine, Lena Dunham, Weiner & Johnson make GQ's list of 2016's least influential people

If you were arranging publications based on their political content, any given issue of GQ Magazine would sit comfortably to the left of Marx & Engels. GQ is to sane political discourse what a pack of rabid pit bulls is to a steak. After all, this is the rag that keeps Keith Olbermann locked in a basement closet, where a food pellet drops each time he records one of his insane rants for YouTube. That means they have a nasty habit of letting the mask slip and sharing their insane feelings. In a year where the American left proved itself to be riddled with absolute morons, GQ has singled out a few people at whom disappointed progressives can direct their rage. Hillary, Weiner, Kaine, and Lena Dunham all get mentions.

Remember, if the Democrats had won, you’d be hearing none of this. GQ doesn’t really care that these are terrible people, or that they’re wrong about virtually everything. The magazine is not interested in the actual worth of their ideas and abilities. They only care that Hillary lost. As such, their list of “2016’s least influential people” is less about real politics, and more about liberal snowflakes lashing out at those who failed them. If you think Democrats are mad at Republicans, just imagine the hatred they have for their own party - a group of people who squandered the best chance they’ve ever had to end the concept of the United States as a constitutionally-limited republic. They thought their socialist utopia was finally within their grasp, and this gaggle of imbeciles ruined it all. They will never be forgiven. Enjoy the liberal tears, but mind the saucy language. Unfortunately, it comes with the butthurt…. Anthony Weiner

You idiot. You breathtaking, unbelievable idiot. Don’t even talk to us right now. Don’t even look at us. You should just go lock yourself in the pantry and stay there until we tell you to come out, which will be never. Even Woody Allen was never this destructively horny. You #.

Tim Kaine

Do we know where he is? Does he still exist? Did he ever exist? Or was he simply an enlarged cutout of a stock photo that Hillary Clinton chose as a running mate because her whole campaign consisted of nothing but tragically safe and conservative choices? I’ve had dreams that lingered longer than this guy. Lena Dunham

You’re not helping. Hillary Clinton

I hate putting her here, given that liberals turned on her like pit vipers the moment she conceded, and given that nearly three million more people voted for her than her opponent, and given that Russia deliberately hijacked the election cycle. But I have no choice. When you lose an election to Donald Trump, you belong on this list. How do you # that up?? It’s Donald Trump! I genuinely doubt whether that man can tie his own shoes, and he still beat her. Would it have killed you to visit Wisconsin, Hillary? I know it’s full of fat people and bad pretzels, but sometimes you gotta come out of your fundraising hole and kiss some babies. I’ll never get over it. I’ll be 80 and on my deathbed and my kids will be around me and I’ll beckon them closer and, in my final moments, I will whisper these words like a secret: “I can’t believe she lost to that #.”

Lest you think they reserved their anger solely for members of their own party, GQ also offers up a two-fer featuring pseudo-Libertarian Gary Johnson and joke candidate Jill Stein… Gary Johnson

Of all the choices the Libertarian party could have made, they chose the one guy dumber than Trump to rep their cause. Aleppo? What’s Aleppo? Is that the new Pixar movie? I heard about this movie! It’s the one with the squirrel, right? Gary couldn’t even win the coveted “Third Party candidate who ruins everything for the Democrats” title this year. That honor went to Jill Stein, who thinks autism is caused by handiwipes. See? They’re not mad because they ran a morally-bankrupt liar who is - and always was - despised by most of the country. They’re not acknowledging that the election was a mass-rejection of the last 8 years. Heck, they just barely admit that Hillary’s campaign might not have been perfectly managed. No, they’re outraged that they failed to beat a man they consider to be the absolute nadir of humanity. ...And that’s a good thing. The longer they refuse to do any sort of actual introspection, the faster they’ll continue their slide into irrelevance, and the better off we’ll all be.



Robert Laurie -- Bio and Archives Robert Laurie’s column is distributed by HermanCain.com, which can be found at HermanCain.com Be sure to “like” Robert Laurie over on Facebook and follow him on Twitter. You’ll be glad you did.

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