FizzyGreenWater Mon 20-May-19 12:28:04

You're being very sensible.



I also think the email is a good idea. Or at least, writing out what's whirring round in your head and what you would say to him. It will give you something to do and allow you to organise your thoughts. By the time you eventually DO speak to him, if you do - you will have a better chance of things coming out the way you want them to as the phrases will be in your head.



Can you avoid speaking tonight? If he already thinks you are tired, can you text and say you've got a terrible headache, real migraine, you'll pass him on to the kids quickly for a chat tonight but you'll pass on chatting?



In the meantime - make sure you have evidence of what you have found safe and copied to your own files, etc. Or a pic of the screen or whatever.



Also you could think about things you might need to do should this situation lead to something more serious. First advice for example on finding evidence of eg being unfaithful is for you to make sure you've got access to all financial info etc before you confront your partner, in case they then make moves to hide things from you. You could also think (hypothetically right now) about that and make sure you are in a position of strength.