Purveyors of the recent “deep house” explosion have discovered that the best way to maintain massively inflated sales is to eliminate any vestige of being deep or house.

“You don’t really need any of the elements that historically informed the deep house sound like jazzy melodies or atmospheric rolling basslines,” confirmed London based deep house wunderkunt, Alex Thurnball, who got into the genre way back in December.

“All you really need now is the name deep house, which thanks to Beatport’s mislabelling and new listeners’ lack of understanding of the genre, you can take quite easily without anyone being any the wiser.”

Alex claims that having listened to an actual deep house track by “Kerry Chandelier” he was gobsmacked to discover that it didn’t sound like deep house at all.

“I didn’t sound like it’d be enjoyable to ram ket during it,” chimed Alex. “It was, if anything, a bit too boring. Sort of just background, lounge music without any big drops or flagrant synth stabs like deep house artists Ten Walls or MK would use.”

“Safe to say this Kerry Chandelier chick isn’t deep house at all,” he added. “I’d actively encourage anyone who is out there making deep house to avoid using any of the musical motifs found in that music cause it’s not proper deep house and people just won’t buy it.”

“If you do need a template to work off, I’d suggest 90s garage,” he offered.

Alex claims that he’s working on a deep house track right now that he thinks will blow up in the summer as “it sounds a bit like Disclosure, has Jessie Ware singing on it and will hopefully have a Julio Bashmore remix so is basically the quintessential deep house track”.

Acts like Jimpster and Dennis Ferrer are said to be disappointed that the genre they’ve been championing for years has been incorrectly reappropriated by more mainstream acts to sell tracks.

“Every electronic track now not immediately identifiable as a specific genre is just being labelled as deep house because the name has caught on,” explained Jimpster in an interview with Wunderground. “Deep house now basically just means anything not techno or EDM. Although, soon it’ll probably replace EDM as a journalist suggested misnomer to mean all dance music and thus lose all validity as a useful term to describe a sub genre.”

“When Steve Aoki is talking about releasing a deep house album you know the term has lost all credible meaning,” he added.