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Unlike the loquacious Ramsey, Perez was nervous, tried to speak clearly and concisely, and -- when he heard screams coming from Castro's house several years ago -- had his sister call 911 rather than embark upon a one-man Hardy Boys adventure (which would presumably be titled The Hardy Boys in the Case of We Just Lost All Faith in Humankind).

In this situation, calling the cops was the rational response. But a 2008 study on World War II veterans found that the vets who were decorated for heroism also considered themselves to be risk-takers, or Type T personalities. This is caused by fewer dopamine-inhibiting receptors in the brain, something that also causes someone to be more impulsive (as well as less inhibited) in a new environment -- such as a live television interview.

The Washington Post / Getty

Ramsey, seen here explaining his unified theory of UFOs and the federal deficit to a radio show host.

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So what happened in Cleveland last week? We learned of a horrific crime lifted straight from the 2003 South Korean crime drama Oldboy and then saw that the kidnapped women's savior was a wacky neighbor on par with Cosmo Kramer. Somehow, this makes sense.