The New England Patriots have to play the Cleveland Browns on Sunday and it totally, totally sucks. It sucks for the Patriots, for the Browns, for Patriots fans, for Browns fans, for fans of neither team, for Tom Brady, for Cody Kessler, for Robert Griffin III and Josh McCown (for whom everything kind of sucks right now), for you, for me. For everyone.

Here’s why: Tom Brady’s Deflategate suspension is over. He’s once again allowed to step foot in Gillette Stadium, talk to his teammates, watch film, and coordinate with the Patriots coaching staff, which are all things he couldn’t do thanks to his punishment resulting from the longest sports scandal-that-wasn’t-even-a-scandal-and-don’t-let’s-get-started in the history of sports.

Sunday will therefore be the kick-off show of the Tom Brady Revenge Tour of Doom (Belichick and the Say-Nothing Press Conferences are opening). The Patriots play best when they’re at their most hated, their angriest, or both — remember when they went 16-0 in the 2007 season after Spygate? This fired-up, retribution-seeking version of Brady will probably be like a supercharged football missile that a Bad Guy spent five weeks making in his secret lair deep beneath a cranberry bog near Foxboro: A weapon of Mass. destruction (sorry).

Bleacher Report‘s Mike Freeman spoke to several coaches in the NFL who are all terrified at the thought of what a fired up Brady will mean for their defenses.

“Thanks to Roger Goodell,” an assistant coach told him, “Tom Brady is going to kill us all.”

A doctor once told me that only idiots promise to eat their shirts if their predictions don’t come true, so I won’t do that. But if I ever were to ingest cotton for any reason, it would be over how shocked I am that the Patriots could manage to lose to the Browns.

Sure, New England’s defense hasn’t been as strong this year as it was after Spygate. But they haven’t been bad (save for last week against Buffalo when they just decided not to show up for work, apparently) and they’ve got some help on the way in the form of newly-unsuspended defensive end Rob Ninkovich. He was out for four games, like Brady, following a positive test for a banned substance he claims not to have known he took. Also in the Patriots’ favor is the fact that they figured out how to beat Browns’ defensive coordinator Ray Horton’s style of play pretty decisively last year — they scored 33 points against the Titans in 2015 when Horton was in Tennessee.

Now let’s talk about the Browns: They already lost starting quarterback Robert Griffin III and his backup Josh McCown to shoulder injuries. Rookie QB Cody Kessler put up a good fight against Washington in Week 4 until Josh Norman intercepted him and took away any hope for a win. They’ve lost every game they’ve played this year and have the worst record in the AFC. They last won a playoff game in 1994, a Super Bowl 30 years before that.

Making them serve as the sacrificial lamb on New England’s altar just feels like rubbing salt in the team’s and its fans’ existing wounds.

But the match-up also isn’t great for Patriots fans. It’s good in the sense that the Pats don’t have to face, say, the Steelers, and Pittsburgh’s insane, gorgeous, terrifying, Antonio Brown-blessed offense for Brady’s first game post-suspension. But it would be nice if they were matched with an opponent that could fight back a little bit more and give them at least a jog for their money. There won’t be as much joy to be had for groupies of the Revenge Tour in a blow-out as there would be if the stars of the show took down a tougher team.

It also sucks that the game is in Cleveland. If any Browns fans even bother going, they’ll mostly likely have to watch a beat-down, while Patriots fans will be robbed of the joy that would come with watching Brady take the stage and crank the proverbial amp up to 11 in Foxboro. And it sucks for fans who don’t care about either team because they probably a) already hate the Patriots and don’t want to witness them be really good and b) most likely don’t expect much from the Browns this year, anyway.

In short, this all sucks. But it probably sucks the most for me, because, now that I’ve written this, the Browns will almost certainly win by 10.