When my oldest son was a toddler, taking him out of the house was a nightmare. He didn't like to be dragged along on boring errands so he would whine and fight incessantly. He invented a game to make his own fun, which involved him running as fast as he could while I tried to catch him. I gave myself extra points if I managed not to startle his baby sister to tears while I rapidly maneuvered her stroller through a sea of startled people.

What made it worse was that it seemed like all the other young kids I saw out in public were well behaved. Everywhere were moms casually strolling through the grocery store while adorable children smiled sweetly up at them. How could I get my kid to act like all those little angels? I tried everything I knew to make my son behave. I read countless parenting articles and sought advice from experienced parents.

But nothing worked.

And then I discovered the glorious place known as the Dollar Store. Kids love the Dollar Store. It's filled with fun, cheap stuff that's all placed low to the ground so they can peruse at their leisure. When kids walk into the Dollar Store the old, boring toys at home suddenly pale in comparison to the cool brand new stuff they see on the shelves before them. And they learn pretty quickly that if there's something they ask for, mommy or daddy might just say "yes" since it's all so cheap. I am very careful with my money but when my son asked for something that only cost one dollar it was hard to refuse.

I began to stop at the Dollar Store during most of my errands so that my son could pick out something to entertain himself with. New toys in hand, my son was occupied and generally happy while I was free to check things off my "to do" list. Plus, if he did begin to act up, I could threaten to take his brand new toys away and that settled him pretty quickly. It was a win-win situation and we were both content.

Until one day, after a trip to the mall with my son, my husband wondered aloud why our child had several new toys. I told him, "It's okay. Just cheap stuff from the Dollar Store. Only cost me five dollars for all of it."

"But he doesn't know that," my husband replied. "All he knows is that you went out for a bit and bought him a lot of toys!"

Huh. I hadn't thought of that. I was so pleased with the results of my compromise that the potential consequences hadn't even occurred to me.

I began to realize that in my son's eyes, his misbehaviour in public meant that mommy bought him a bunch of new stuff every time we went somewhere. This was definitely not a lesson I wanted to teach him. Settling for peace in the short term was going to mean I would have major problems with my son in the long term. His expectations for what he was entitled to were skyrocketing. And it was all my fault.

Raising children who are thankful for what we've provided them with instead of always demanding more is a tremendous challenge for parents. Young kids are notoriously self-centered and, as a result, instilling grateful attitudes involves training them to go counter to their own natures. But it's essential that we make the effort. We don't do our children any favours by teaching them the world will revolve around them after they grow up and leave our homes. Gratitude, therefore, is a learned skill and it's difficult to teach; you can make your kids write thank you notes but you can't make them actually feel thankful.

So, how do we get our kids to to be thankful for what we've provided instead of feeling entitled to more? In most cases, children lack perspective of what life is like outside of their own limited experiences. They often can't understand what they even have to feel grateful about, especially if they think their friends have more than they do.

I've realized that gratitude, like many other values, isn't a lesson that can be taught all at once. Rather, we need to make our homes into environments that encourage grateful attitudes to develop. In our home, we no longer buy stuff we don't need, make sure to say "please" and "thank you," give our kids regular chores they must do, talk about what life is like for others in the world, and make efforts to help those less fortunate. We try not to compare ourselves to people who have more than we do, instead we think about people who have less.

I can't guarantee that when my kids are adults they will lead lives bursting with gratitude. But setting up our home as an environment where gratitude can flourish is the best way I can think of to lead them on that path.

And it definitely doesn't involve unnecessary trips to the Dollar Store.