A man goes and shoots a number of people leaving 7 dead (including himself) and at least 13 injured. Among both the dead and injured are both men and women (dead are 5 men, 2 women).

Feminists catch on - and realise that he was a member of PUA forums - they seize their opportunity and try to blame it on the MRM - even to the point where celebrities that I actually kind of like (such as Wil Wheaton and MC Frontalot) are jumping in on the MRA bashing as well.

I don’t consider myself an MRA - but this is fucking disgusting.

These people are piling onto the dead while the bodies are still warm - and the perpetrator himself, practically smearing their bloody entrails over themselves in order to feel reasonably justified in lashing out against a movement that has seemingly nothing to do with it.



First off, let’s clear the MRM. They say he was an MRA - but there’s zero evidence of this. He was active on PUA forums, and used Red Pill terminology. Anyone interested in social justice at all knows that MRAs aren’t the same as RedPillers or PUAs - and they often clash over shit. MRAs tend to reject the alpha/beta talk of the RedPillers, and have different goals to PUA entirely (fighting for equal rights vs. hooking up with women *shrug).

People said that Elliot Rodger was subscribed to MRM channels on youtube - when I checked, I didn’t recognise any (though admittedly I only subscribe to GWW). It seems he has a stronger set of ties with Pokemon, WoW, and Game of Thrones than he does with the MRM, judging by his youtube channel. Surely he would have been subscribed to GWW, TyphonBlue, Paul Elam, JonTheOther… any of those? Nope.

And when you look at how the MRM has responded - it is mostly an opposition to Rodger’s views - and a sense of sadness that he fell into the trap of placing the focus of his self esteem on his sex life. The MRM is fundamentally against the way Elliot thought.

Pretty much, the whole attack on the MRM is completely unfounded

But all of this defense is in vein if I don’t explain how we should be looking at it.

Let’s make this clear - first off, yes Elliot was plainly a misogynist, and misanthrope.



I’m not going to deny that - he had some awful views, and should be held accountable for them - and of course, his actions.



He had Aspergers. Now this was not likely the cause of the shootings, or the views in itself. In my line of work I interact with people who have Aspergers nearly daily, and I was incorrectly treated for it myself as a child (long story, might talk about it later) - so I want to ensure that I am completely respectful when saying this, but if you read his manifesto he does cite that he felt awful about being so awkward around women and this was a source of pain for him.

Aspergers often manifests with difficulty in social situations - as I’m sure everyone knows, so while Aspergers certainly isn’t the cause of the violence, it definitely put Elliot in a position where he was vulnerable. It was particularly exacerbated by the values that formed the basis of his identity.

He was bullied at school. This is something that’s also talked about in his manifesto. I grew up with a boy with Aspergers who was bullied all throughout elementary school and most of high - and it was brutal. That kind of bullying has awful effects on anyone.

I’m not here to defend his actions, but just to look at how we can stop this from happening again. That is - what can we do?

Unlike what a lot of people think - trying to tear down a rights movement probably isn’t the answer. Even if you were going to try to tear down the PUA and RedPill groups - well… could you? They’re always going to exist while the societal problems that promote them exist - and I’m not talking about the vague blanket answer “misogyny” - I’m talking about a society where people feel so undervalued that they adopt the attitudes that Elliot Rodger possessed. Even if you did somehow implement some Orwellian “you can’t say this on the internet” legislation - the communities would likely move to TOR. You can’t even really try to tarnish them into disbanding, as they already feel as if they’re operating from a position in which they are being victimized.

So rather than bitching at people, and trying to blame groups for the action of a person (do we really need to talk about Valerie Solanas?) - what can we do?

We should discuss how the bullying affected Elliot and try to stop bullying in schools (a colossal task in itself) We should improve our health care and psychotherapy standards (and accessibility) so that this can be averted early, or altogether. (though in this case the shooter was wealthy and getting help, most aren’t) We should ensure that men not only seek help for mental issues - but also take their health seriously. Elliot did see a therapist - but in his manifesto it seems he didn’t take the visits seriously. We should discuss, promote and celebrate aspects of masculinity that are positive - to help young men realize who they are and take pride in that. We should tackle self esteem issues in whatever areas we can (this is again, a huge task - hard to even know where we can start - probably with point #2) Given Elliot did fit the “awkward gamer” stereotype - and maybe that had an influence in his social life - maybe we could tackle that? Promote the acceptance of “nerds” and “geeks” in our culture (rather than seeing them as something to be laughed at and bullied) - and teach people to moderate their lives more effectively (as someone whose brother is a big gamer, a lot of people could use this lesson). We could sure try to combat misogyny - but I don’t personally believe that misogyny is a cultural norm at all. You might be on your own with that - but if you can find a way to combat it, please do.

I’m not trying to paint Elliot as a victim, but in some circumstances - he sort of was. He was desperate, depressed, and needed help. Unfortunately he didn’t find the kind of help he needed. Note that all of the above points (bar #7) are points that to some degree, the MRM tries to address (maybe not the gamer one so much - but the idea of men as inept manchildren is definitely a peeve of theirs).

So if you pieces of shit could stop trying to politicize this tragedy, and start working towards real solutions - that would be fantastic. Feminists? If you do want to actually say “yes we also help men” - this would be a fantastic start.

I am saddened by how this has been handled so far.