On Saturdays, we ask the people behind some of our favorite websites to fill in for us. You get to learn about an awesome site you may not have heard of, and we get to watch cartoons in our boxers. Today we're bringing you the truth behind some sex ideas that sound great, but are actually terrible, from Philalawyer.net. If you're like me, and I think you are, seeing as we both share an affinity for the internet, you're probably bored with all the constant sex you're having. Even when it's with another person. It's always the same - the missionary, the dog style, that thing where you put the Saran Wrap over her face. You find yourself thinking, "There's got to be more than this, some new ideas to spice things up." There are, but it's not all good... Advertisement

7 Filming It We're both putting on the just-out-college-in-first-job twenty five. I barely fit in my Dockers and have an impressive set of B-cup man-breasts. Your ass is expanding faster than the Chinese economy, and you're really insecure about it. Let's film ourselves fucking. We'll do it on the futon, in your efficiency unit. You have fluorescent reading lights next to your bed, right? I want to make sure we get all my backne, and those hairy moles on your thigh. Continue Reading Below Advertisement Problem No. 1: She never wants to have sex again. Problem No. 2: That's fine with you.

6 Mutual Masturbation I'm naked, you're naked, and we both want to get off. Here's a thought... Why don't we do exactly what we would if neither one of us could get laid? In front of each other. Problem No. 1: Ever jerk off in the mirror? Yeah, it's that ugly. Problem No. 2: She's competitive. Problem No. 3: Continue Reading Below Advertisement She's never going to win.

5 The "Facial" I'm plowing away on your pelvis, giving you the old "white man's jackhammer." You're numb, analyzing the stucco on the ceiling and waiting for me to finish. What do you say I pull out just when I'm ready, straddle you and jerk off on your face? "It's really sexy... Lots of women love it." Problem No. 1: Explaining where you got the idea. Continue Reading Below Advertisement Problem No. 2: Using "the internet" or "Ron Jeremy" in that discussion. Problem No. 3: Having to finish yourself off on the couch watching Skinemax.