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In an unfortunate turn of events, a local man has today had to come to terms with the fact that his ex-misso is undergoing quite a glo-up.

Bryden Cartwright, a 30-something moron that broke up with his relatively long-term girlfriend because he thought he was a shoe-in with another hot chick he met at work, has been dealt a body blow – after his ex returned to the newsfeed with a full-blown Natalie Joyce.

“Everyone is seeing this transformation, and only my closest mates have the nerve to mention it in front of me”

“Yes. I am aware. She’s looking good. Godammit”

Local ex-misso, Katie Marsden, says her new health regime isn’t so much about spiting her dumb arse ex-boyfriend – but more about having the time to focus on her health. Now that the emotional torment of dating a full-blown commitmentphobe is in the rear-view.

“I’m dead-lifting 120 kegs” she says.

“That’s almost more than Bryden weighs. And way more than he can lift”

“And yes. There’s a couple guys on the scene”

While Bryden is now readjusting to life back in a sharehouse for the first time in the best part of a decade, Katie’s living arrangements aren’t exactly common knowledge. But there’s a big chance she’s staying with her sister, a prominent Betoota-based femme fatale who always wondered why she was going out with that moron.

“She won’t say it, but I will” said her sister.

“Katie is killing it right now”

“She’s back baby”