We’ve seen some weird stuff in the mainstream media lately … well, weird for normal people, normal for journalists in the mainstream media. ISIS leader Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, according to the Washington Post, was an “austere religious scholar” first and foremost. The members of Iran’s Quds Force who attacked the U.S. Embassy in Baghdad were “mourners.”

And terrorist Qasem Soleimani was described by the Washington Post as Iran’s “revered military leader,” despite people in Iran celebrating his death in the streets.

Was the assassination of #Soleimani an act of war? It will certainly be read that way in Iran and across the Middle East. An epic turn of events in the world's most volatile region that may ensure Soleimanis influence even in death. My @newyorker analysis. https://t.co/ni9C3CCTIt — Robin Wright (@wrightr) January 3, 2020

But nothing could prepare us for the New Yorker’s “analysis” of the death of Soleimani, written by Robin Wright.

Good morning to everyone except The New Yorker! "Suleimani, a flamboyant former construction worker and bodybuilder with snowy white hair, a dapper beard, and arching salt-and-pepper eyebrows…" They forgot to mention he was also a poet and told jokes!https://t.co/6oDS6VGoVf pic.twitter.com/A4PdOhc56Y — Imam of Peace / Pray for Peace… (@Imamofpeace) January 4, 2020

"Suleimani, a flamboyant former construction worker and bodybuilder with snowy white hair, a dapper beard, and arching salt-and-pepper eyebrows" WTF? ? https://t.co/nTOEW9eKkX — Queen Paola ?? ?? ?? (@Paola_Dec1231) January 4, 2020

I heard he made a hell a good chocolate chip cookie too. — I AIN’T LYIN’ (@ELCAMINONEGRO) January 4, 2020

"austere" is so 3 months ago… Let's use flamboyant!! ? — Minimander (@Minimander1) January 4, 2020

He was so dreamy. — Ian Ross (@IanrossWins) January 4, 2020

The New Yorker just walked him out of a romantic fantasy. I thought he was more familiar with throwing missiles than looking sexy. — Sir Dickson (@Wizarab10) January 4, 2020

I thought you were joking, but thats what they wrote for real ?! — Miss S (@ItsMssS) January 4, 2020

New Yorker, 1932: “Compact and dynamic, with a tidy clipped mustache, this Austrian artist captivates audiences with his wistful, folksy tales…” — Tim Bagwell (@Bama_Tim) January 4, 2020

He was a real family man who never missed his kids soccer games — Quartz (@Quartz95290058) January 4, 2020

He loved children and played ukelele. Such a loss. — Wilcham (@witmich) January 4, 2020

He was a handsome killer ???with a "Dapper" beard who likes animals and walking on the beach holding hands. lol #TerroristDatingSite — Miss Know-it-all (@KittyBlowsGlass) January 4, 2020

Sounds like someone at New Yorker had a crush on him… — Piyush Banerjee (@PiyushBanerje15) January 4, 2020

What a sweet, poignant eulogy. Almost brings tears to my eyes. — Scáthach (@jo_enck) January 4, 2020

Thoughts and prayers for you during this difficult time — ?Paddy O’Dhonnabhain? (@ODhonnabhain) January 4, 2020

My condolences for your loss. — Perry Bullock (@PerryBullock) January 4, 2020

Hard losing a loved one. So sorry for your loss — Fire wife ? Paula. Text TRUMP TO 88022 (@Firewife_Paula) January 4, 2020

Pray for Robin. She's really struggling w/her loss. "Suleimani, a flamboyant former construction worker and bodybuilder with snowy white hair, a dapper beard, and arching salt-and-pepper eyebrows, gained notice during the eight-year war with Iraq, in the nineteen eighties." https://t.co/T671hEPDyG — Ella Vader ????? (@kilomikealpha76) January 4, 2020

A huge shout-out to The People’s Cube for the meme:

Soleimani eulogy in the @NewYorker reads like a romance novel, authored by a dreamy woman with darkly erotic fantasies about sadistic tyrants & their BDSM dungeons, which gets subliminally encoded in her body of work.https://t.co/1Qvy7PupoN#Soleimani @TheNewYorker_fa pic.twitter.com/zaSdhcdGES — The Most Revered People's Cube ?? (@ThePeoplesCube) January 4, 2020

What did you think of her follow-up article “General Suleimani gave me the Spanking I Deserve “? — Garrett Powell (@GarrettsBrain) January 4, 2020

She thought he was smoking hot before we even bombed him. — SP (@SP_Fury) January 4, 2020

That’s not even all of it. Remember how killing Soleimani was like taking out Abraham Lincoln, George Washington, and Captain America all in one? Wright had some choice words for Soleimani’s elite Quds Force as well:

The Quds – similar to the SEALS, Delta Force, and Rangers combined? GTFOH — Gary Ullrich (@garyullrich) January 4, 2020

The Quds: “Iranian commandoes equivalent to the SEALs, Delta Force, and the Rangers, combined.? ????????? Right. And I am the King of Old Siam. — David Alexander (@PrincesssDad1) January 4, 2020

did "NewYorker" REALLY say that the Quds is = "Seals" + "Delta force" + "Rangers" *combined* ? really ?? — Aditya Arunachalam #நாளைய_தமிழகம்_ரஜினி (@IamSukhoi) January 4, 2020

Exactly, combined! Lol — Daniel Gabatel (@danielgabatel) January 4, 2020

"Suleimani, a flamboyant former construction worker and bodybuilder with snowy white hair, a dapper beard, & arching salt-&-pepper eyebrows, gained notice during the eight-year war with Iraq, in the 1980s." He was a terrorist. You're acting like you had his poster on your wall. — Ella Vader ????? (@kilomikealpha76) January 4, 2020

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