Julian Assange gestures to the media from a police vehicle on his arrival at Westminster Magistrates court on April 11, 2019 in London, England. Photo : Jack Taylor ( Getty Images )

I guess Julian Assange, the WikiLeaks founder, forgot that he was a houseguest while living inside the Ecuadorian Embassy in London and didn’t realize that he could only smear the walls with feces in the home where he pays rent. Apparently, Assange is a really shitty houseguest.



See what I did there?

According to Vice News, Assange’s beard wasn’t the only thing unkempt: The world’s most famous leaker reportedly smelled like zoo dirt because he wouldn’t bathe, and he skateboarded in the hallways ruining the floors, oh, and he wasn’t just smearing feces on the walls, he was being rude to staff.


On Thursday, a bearded Assange was dragged out of the London embassy like a grown man who smears feces on a wall. Vice notes that Ecuadorian President Lenin Moreno considered Assange “an inherited problem” and a “stone in the shoe” for him.

“The discourteous and aggressive behavior of Mr. Julian Assange; the hostile and threatening declarations of his allied organization against Ecuador, and especially the transgression of international treaties, have led the situation to a point where the asylum of Mr. Assange is unsustainable and no longer viable,” Moreno said, Thursday morning, Vice News reports.


Assange began living at the embassy in 2012; no word on when he became such a shitty tenant, but he was staying there to duck extradition to Sweden where he faced rape allegations that were later dropped. “Assange now faces up to five years in prison for trying to help Chelsea Manning hack into a secure Pentagon computer system,” Vice News reports.

Several lawmakers noted that the 47-year-old man-boy’s behavior became more ridiculous during his nearly seven-year stay.


Below are a list of reasons published in Vice News as to why Ecuador straight tossed his ass out:

Feces: Interior Minister Maria Paula Romo told reporters Thursday that the previous administration had allowed Assange to get away with behavior like “putting feces on the walls of the embassy and other behaviors of that nature.” Costs: Foreign Minister José Valencia told Ecuador’s National Assembly that the country had spent in total $5.8 million in security costs between June 2012 to September 2018. The security costs since have dropped Valencia said, but he added that the country had laid out about $400,000 in medical, food, laundry and legal expenses for Assange. Skateboarding: Valencia outlined some of Assange’s more erratic behavior inside the embassy, including skateboarding, a practice Ecuador’s former ambassador to Britain, Juan Falconí Puig, said “damaged floors, walls, and doors.” Assange also liked to play soccer inside with many of the guests who visited. On one occasion when a security guard took Assange’s ball away, the WikiLeaks founder shoved the guard, grabbed the ball and “launched the ball at his body.” Hygiene: Valencia told lawmakers that Assange had “improper hygiene practices,” a charge which has been levied against Assange previously. Last October the embassy staff were so fed up with Assange’s personal habits, that they issued a memo demanding he clean up after himself. Aggressive behavior: Both Moreno and Valencia described Assange’s behavior towards embassy staff as “aggressive.” This included insulting embassy staff and using a loudspeaker in the middle of the night. He also used to block security cameras and accuse staff of spying on him. Spying allegations: It appears that one of the final straws was WikiLeaks’ allegations earlier this week that the Ecuadorian government was trying to blackmail Assange using videotapes of a medical examination obtained by a sophisticated surveillance system inside the embassy. Health: Ecuador also said it had concerns about Assange’s health. Romo said his mental and physical health deteriorated while he was holed up inside the embassy.


Did I mention that he put feces on the wall? Also, white privilege.