This is the 100th post to the blog, so I figured I owed it and you something special. Something extra Dollop-y.

I found it.

Another dolphin-lover. With an extra twist.

Twist with a backflip.

Meet Malcom J. Brenner.

Brenner has written a novel, a romance novel, called Wet Goddess, which he has self-published after being rejected by several publishing houses. Hold on for this sharp turn. He actually started working on this semi-autobiographical novel in 1973 at the suggestion of Dr. John C. Lilly.

You okay? No whiplash? Still with me? Good.

But Brenner wasn’t ready to face his love for Dolly the dolphin then, even with Lilly’s encouragement (hopefully not with any of Lilly’s storehouse of vitamin K and LSD).

“I was still too emotionally raw from the experience and my writing skills were inadequate to the task,” Brenner said. He took it up again in 1994, finished the novel in 2000 and spent the next 10 years trying to get it published. Brenner said he shopped it around, but after “mainstream” publishers rejected “Wet Goddess,” he decided to self-publish the book last year. So far he has sold about 230 paperback copies and 20 e-books. “I wrote this book for dolphins because we are mistreating these animals by keeping them in captivity,” Brenner said. “We should be attempting to communicate with them and treating them with more respect and dignity.”

Yeah, the kind of respect and dignity that only comes with sticking your dick in them. Yes, another real-life romance between person who knows Dr. Lilly and dolphin. I see a pattern. It’s not quite clear yet, though. . .

Brenner seems to consider Dolly the dolphin his college sweetheart, which really makes me wonder about any human women in his life.

Brenner said he might consider another relationship with a dolphin in the future. “Under the right circumstances I would if I had the energy for it,” Brenner said. “I’m 40 years older now.”

No one tell him about male enhancement drugs. For the love of all that is holy.

Thankfully, bestiality is now illegal in Florida–but two attempts before failed. Someone challenged two attempts to make bestiality illegal and succeeded. I really do wonder about you, Florida. Is it the Gulf air that does something to you?

And the boundaries get creepier, naturally.

He’s not married, but Brenner said he has two ex-wives who knew about his fling with Dolly. “Neither one objected,” Brenner said.

What is his exact definition of “object”, I wonder.

His daughter from his first marriage even designed the book cover.

No. NO. When you write a thinly veiled sex-autobiography, bestiality aside, your kid should not write the blurb for the back cover, do press releases, and certainly shouldn’t do the cover art! NO NO NO. (I hope you can hear me through your screen, I am channeling my inner Gareth.)

(source: The Huffington Post, in an amazingly titled article, “Sleeps with the Fishes”. Kudos, Huff.)

The featured image is from an upcoming tv-length (appears to be) documentary about Brenner, still in production, Dolphin Lover.

Malcom J. Brenner Author Page :

Wet Goddess

Growing Up In The Orgone Box: Secrets Of A Reichian Childhood

This definitely goes deeper than mere paraphilia. Notice his other book? Wilhelm Reich took Freudianism, stuck his dick in it, and did the Hokey Pokey. Sorry for all the technical terms. That’s my master’s in counseling talking. Brenner was raised in a Reichian household, which I suspected meant open boundaries, open sexuality, the whole nine yards. I did a little research, and, yes. I found some dark, spooky stuff about his childhood that I will just let lie where I found it. You can read the Orgone book if you need the ugly details.

But, notice that word Orgone? Even if you have never heard of Reich, it probably sound a tad familiar. It should.

I present: Kate Bush’s “Cloudbusting “: video on her official site, which is also the official site of her production company, Fish People.

Fish People.

I not only Six Degree’d like a madwoman, I went in a circle, an eerie, zoophilic circle, and I think I am spooked. No, I know I am spooked. I am getting out of this pool.