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When you were a kid, unless your parents were sadistic, soulless assholes, you never knew how much a trip to the emergency room cost. You just went in, got patched up and jumped right back onto your homemade jet pack that sent you there in the first place. But once you reach the age and security of breaking off of your parents' insurance (for those of you lucky enough to have parents with insurance), everything changes.

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"OK, while she's distracted, I'll just take this for a down payment."

I'm a contracted writer, which means I don't get benefits because I'm not technically an employee of anyone. There are millions of people out there like me, and if we wanted to get health insurance for ourselves and our families, it would cost us $15,000 a year. I live in an area where the average income is right around $20,000. So pretty much their entire year would be spent working for just health insurance and nothing else. And if they don't have to go to the hospital that year? "Wow, that sucks. But thanks for the money, you gullible fuck socket."

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But what if you're a single person? In 2009 and 2010, the average cost of a single person's insurance was about $5,000 a year. The average price of an ER visit? $1,300. It takes just a bit of third grade math to figure out that when you factor in the out of pocket deductible that you have to pay each time you use the insurance, it would take five or more trips to the ER in order for you to just break even. And if you're in the emergency room five times a year, you need to be placed in a padded room because you are a danger to yourself and society.