Malkavians are by far, the most difficult Clan to roleplay. It's not easy to pull off a convincing Malk, avoiding clichés and ridiculousness. Yet, there are a few simple and easy guidelines I'd like to share with you to help you create or improve your character.



The tips aren't arranged in any particular order. And they are by no means stiff rules. Instead, they should be treated as advice from the cranky old aunt who has been roleplaying with varying intensity for about a decade.



Shall we get started? We shall.



Malkavians are diverse. What makes this Clan so wonderful, is that virtually anyone can be a Malkavian. Their Embraces may seem random yet Sires, willingly or not, contribute to the Clan's hive mind consciousness when introducing a new Fledgling.



Don't think insanity automatically frees you from any responsibility!



Your character's actions must have their consequences. Being insane is NOT a "Get Out of Jail" card. Yes, your Malk can't help him/herself, but you must know then to focus on the story, not their delusions. A wise Storyteller might overlook your antics, but in the right time should give you a proper scolding. When I was new to old WoD I was told this story. Picture a Camarilla meeting. The Prince is addressing the Kindred of the city. Suddenly, a rag doll flies across the room and hits him right between the eyes. A Malkavian get's up in the auditory, yells "Bad Suzie! Get back here!" Runs up the Prince, picks his doll up, and gets back to his place with a gleeful grin. The Prince of course would never be petty or vindictive when everyone is looking, so he continues the meeting as if nothing had happened. The Malkavian, however, goes missing a few nights later and is never heard from again. Makes you think, right?



Acting hyper/random does NOT equal insanity.



Malkavians are scary, not funny. They aren't jesters or clowns Well, okay, some are, but more like the "psycho-killer-clown" type. They are meant to freak you out, make uncomfortable and avoid their company by all means possible. Being "random", performing acts of stupidity just for attention is not insanity. In truth, every Malk, though chaotic, has their own solid (crazy) logic that makes them tick. Storytellers should be merciless when interrogating players about their character's derangements, motives and feats. If the character has nothing to offer aside from shouting out random phrased and walking funny, occasionally slapping someone in the face, they should never be permitted to play. Ever. Scratch and start over.



Remember that insanity is something that cripples your character.



Whenever a Player complains that their Malkavian has it harder than other Players and the Storyteller is making the game difficult for them they should consider playing something easier, Brujah for example. You're crazy. You're shunned by society. You're not sure what is real or not and whether your decisions are yours or maybe your delusions push you to them. YOU ARE A HAZARD TO OTHERS AND MOSTLY YOURSELF. Sure, the major perk that comes with being crazy is the fabled insight, but the price is great.



Malks make others feel uneasy around them.



Even if your coterie/whatever accepts you, you will never be fully trusted. No hard feelings, they don't necessarily think you're deceitful. It's the voices in your head they don't trust. Malkavians often feel that they're not treated seriously by the group and are left out of making decisions. And that is understandable. You're insane, who in their right mind would listen to you? The almost positive certainty that they will come crawling back to you after ignoring your useful advice is a whole different thing



Thoroughly explain your character's concept.



This is important. The Players might not know your character, but the Storyteller has to, in order to adequately shape the world around you. Everything is significant, from early childhood, to night of the Embrace. What does your Malk fear? What's their fetish? What arouses their anger or disgust? Be wary that the Storyteller WILL use this to your disadvantage. Was your character sexually abused by their father? Suddenly, you are entrusted with escorting a Ghoul of an important ally to safety. Were you aware that they're a registered child molester?



Avoid clichés or use them to your advantage.



Malkavians are not emo boys and girls in juggalette getup. This trend is somehow very popular with many Players. I blame the new Harley Quinn that somehow looks like Jeanette Voreman. If you really can't resist, try to find inspiration in Batman Universe's Joker. From Jack Nicholson's grotesque clown to Heath Ledger's dark, cynical and auto-destructive scoffer. Malkavians are as (or maybe more) diverse as any clan. They can be anyone, from the latex-clad nympho from the local whorehouse to the quiet granny who enjoys knitting, feeding pigeons in the park and collecting molar teeth from naughty children. So try to think outside the box. Or create a complete cliché Malkavian, wait for the other Players to take the bait, then act in the way they'd never expect. Recall Dev/Null from V:tM Redemption? How would others feel if the seemingly harmless nerd would suddenly demonstrate psychotic tendencies? I really liked it that Dev pretended to be stereotypical to in the end show a glimpse of a keen manipulator. If only Christoph would listen.



Clan Disciplines



Yeah, I get a lot of those Players sometimes complain that the Disciplines suck and should be swapped. Well, Malkavians were never designed for full frontal assault. Most Malk combat styles employ sudden strikes, stealth, booby-traps and other devious devices. Malkavians rush into the battlefield, set all chaos loose, then retreat to marvel at the mess they made. Thus, they're not proficient with Potence, Celerity and similar Disciplines. A smart Malk uses others to get their teeth kicked in, slipping by barely noticed. In terms of traits, I noticed most Malkacian characters are proficient with melee, mostly sharp, pointy makeshift weapons or everyday tools (kitchen/butcher knife being the most popular choice).



Your perception is different



Your character perceives the world differently than the others. Perhaps not in a psychedelic, abstract hallucination, but not the same as other Clans. Maybe you're paranoid? Maybe you suffer from synesthesia. Maybe it's good old fashioned schizophrenia? TO THE STORYTELLERS: Describe the world to the Malkavian characters differently than to the other players. Passing notes or even creepy whispering into their ear (voices) is a good idea. I once had a marvelous gaming session with a Storyteller who would put little notes in my pockets, shoes and tell me to read them in the appropriate time. I almost felt them burn my skin.



Malkavians are not alien to everyday feelings/cravings, but



Their priorities might be differently arranged. Or they feel emotions/stimuli more/less intense. Try to remember that your Malk does not care about norms. Only their own cravings.



Don't make your insanity obvious



Related to not forcing randomness to appear "mad". Some Malks seem pretty sane (even to themselves). Not every instantly makes it obvious that they're nutters. Imagine how hysterical it would be if your character's derangement would uncover itself in the most crucial moments. Like drawing a car with the rest of the gang aboard.



"But I'm speshul!"



I really hate it when someone makes an insane character to hoard attention. This is not about you. Your Malkavian is not special and should not be treated better because they're insane. The Storyteller has every right to kill your Character in the most devious way possible when they notice you're playing for attention/asspats. Period.



You are unpredictable. Act like it.



After agreeing that Malkavians are dangerous and unpredictable, let's point out that they're a danger to everyone around, including themselves. You never know when you snap. Stress, rapid action, intense emotions only make the possibility more dire. Your madness may lay dormant for awhile but it will eventually emerge and take you over. Your character will NEVER be truly at peace. Things accumulate inside you to the point of frenzy. Do you feel a bit nervous, even paranoid thanks to your storyteller and wonder when they'll order your character to fall into bedlam? Good, it means they're doing their job right.



You fight twice as hard



With the Beast and Madness. It may vary on your Character's personality Traits whether they want to beat their minds into submission (similar to Instinct) or restrain themselves (Self-control). That's why Malkavians tend to have high Willpower and personality Traits. A lesser mind would surely brake.



Loneliness and company paradox.



This is something deliciously ironic. As a Malk your Character will never fit in. but alone, isolated they will fall into bedlam even faster. You're forced to interact with masses that reject you. That fear and loathe you. What are you going to do about them? Because there's nothing you can do about yourself.



The Cobweb



I came across and committed many misconceptions about the fabled Madness Network. How to describe it most adequately? Well, imagine Recall the Wishing Room in Harry Potter? Okay, so picture a huge room that over millennia accumulated all sorts of useful and dangerous junk. There are also millions of post-it notes scattered all around, most are gibberish, some are burnt, some eaten away by mold. You enter the room, searching for some elder wisdom. The room is littered with booby traps and there's an axe murderer somewhere in its midst. Care to risk?



Airie Feristo May 2012