Here’s some good news for nervous bitcoin investors in the wake of the Chicago Mercantile Exchange’s introduction of its much-hyped “BTC” BTC, -3.84% futures contract: Whitney Tilson says the bitcoin rally is over.

Yes, Tilson, fresh of closing his hedge fund due to abysmal underperformance against the S&P 500 SPX, -2.37% , has updated his crypto take with his latest apocalyptic vision for the asset class.

“In the past week, I’ve been asked about bitcoin by a parade of the least-knowledgeable investors imaginable,” he wrote in a recent note. “And the only times such foolishness has happened before in my 18-year career were at the peak of the internet and housing bubbles, so I’m calling a top right now.”

If this sounds familiar, that’s because Tilson has been calling for the death of bitcoin for a while now. Here’s a handy chart, courtesy of Value Walk:

Of course, there’s no shortage of top-calling with bitcoin these days, but there’s an upside twist to Tilson’s. For this, he earns our call of the day.

“The greed and speculative nature of humans is inherently unpredictable, so for all I know bitcoin could go to $1 million,” he said.

Lest you think Tilson is softening his stance, he’s still confident in what he sees as the “ultimate outcome” for the digital currency: “Smoldering rubble, a lot of finger-pointing (where were the regulators?!), and a lot of tears and empty bank accounts, especially among those who can least afford it.”

No tears yet this morning, because...

Key market gauges

Bitcoin BTCUSD, +1.97% is hovering at just under $20,000 mark as its mind-bending year looks to come to a round-number conclusion. Remember, a year ago, this thing was trading sub-$1,000. Check this out if you’re looking for the NEXT bitcoin.

If bitcoin keeps surging at this rate — a stretch to perhaps even the biggest bulls — it’ll be worth more than all the stocks in the world by April 2019, according to “nutty math” from Quartz, which used this chart to illustrate the fantastical path:

As for stocks, another strong start is shaping up, with futures on the Dow US:YMZ7 and the S&P US:ESZ7 moving nicely higher. The Nasdaq US:NQH8 is poised for an even rosier open. Asia ADOW, -1.74% closed mixed, while Europe SXXP, -0.53% is also riding U.S. tax-plan optimism higher. Gold US:GCZ7 is fairly flat and crude oil US:CLF8 hit a one-week high.

Read more in Market Snapshot

The buzz

All eyes on the tax plan this week, with top Republicans confident they’ll get the job done. Treasury Secretary Steven Mnuchin, for one, said Sunday that he has “no doubt” the GOP will pass its tax bill in the coming days. “This is all about creating a tax system and that’s good for workers, good for working families,” he explained in an interview, adding that President Trump would sign it this week.

Check out:These 55 stocks have at least doubled since Trump was elected

There’s a smattering of deals going down. Over in Europe, France’s multinational Thales HO, -0.31% is buying chip maker Gemalto NL:GTO in a $5.6 billion deal to create “a world leader in digital security.”

Humana HUM, -0.34% is in advanced talks to team up with a couple of private-equity firms in a deal to buy home-care provider Kindred Healthcare US:KND .

Hershey announced a $921 million buyout deal for the owner of Skinny Pop popcorn maker Amplify Snack Brands US:BETR . Those shares are skyrocketing.

Penn National Gaming PENN, -7.21% is buying Pinnacle Entertainment US:PNK in a deal valued at $2.8 billion.

Electricity is back up at Hartsfield-Jackson Atlanta International Airport, where hundreds of flights got cancelled on Sunday afternoon.

The chart

Bitcoin has obviously grabbed most of the market ink this year and deservedly so. But the runner-up spot belongs to the historic malaise that’s descended on the trading pits. The Heisenberg Report blog outpointed further evidence of the epic low-volatility climate with this chart showing how the S&P has gone 68 sessions without a 1% move in either direction. That’s the longest streak since 1995.

And it could very well get longer.

“Are things set to change materially in 2018? Who knows,” the blogger wrote in a post. “The controlling factor here (i.e. short-termism engendered by policymaker transparency and the local stability that myopia creates by optimizing around the prevailing dynamic) is deeply ingrained and without something (e.g. inflation) forcing central banks to withdraw transparency, it’s difficult to see how change is possible.”

He pointed to last week as a perfect example of what’s been going on of late: Three days in the green, two in the red, and a weekly gain of less than 1%.

The stat

‘Star Wars: The Last Jedi’ Walt Disney Co./courtesy Everett / Everett Collection

$220 million — That’s how much the new “Star Wars” brought in at the U.S. box office to make it the second-biggest opening of all time. Total worldwide receipts for the Disney DIS, -3.08% hit reached a massive $450 million.

The economy

There’s plenty to chew on as we head toward the end of the year, with highlights this week coming in the form of housing numbers. At 10:00 a.m. Eastern, we’ll get the December NAHB homebuilder survey on an otherwise quiet Monday in terms of economic data. Then, on Tuesday, housing starts hit, followed by existing home sales a day later. Finally, the Census Bureau will release its new home sales to cap the pre-holiday stretch.

The quote

That time Ted Cruz went there Lucasfilm Ltd./courtesy Everett / Everett Collection

“Thanks for smarm-spaining it to me @tedcruz I know politics can be confusing, but you’d have more credibility if you spelled my name correctly. I mean IT’S RIGHT THERE IN FRONT OF YOU! Maybe you’re just distracted from watching porn at the office again.” — That was a tweet from actor Mark Hamill, who got into a weekend Twitter feud over net neutrality with Texas Sen. Ted Cruz.

It all started when Hamill went after FCC Chairman Ajit Pai over a video in which the latter is seen defending the repeal of net neutrality by dancing around in a Santa suit to Harlem Shake and swinging around a lightsaber.

Hamill tweeted that Pai is “profoundly unworthy 2 wield a lightsaber,” given that taking down net neutrality only helps big corporations. Cruz jumped to defend Pai, invoking Darth Vadar’s name and that’s when Hamill lost it.

The once-young Skywalker has pretty much been declared the winner here:

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