Advance Review:

Has there ever been a cable channel that has split its brand quality so distinctly as FX has with its pedigree lineup of shows like Louie, Justified, and Fargo, and bottom-barrel muck like Charlie Sheen's Anger Management, George Lopez' Saint George, and (now) Kelsey Grammer and Martin Lawrence's Partners

"Let's make something horrible."

The former shows are designed to be distinct, unique top-tier entertainment created to bring discerning eyes to the network. The latter are hacky, rushed, mass-produced multi-cam comedies starring notable sitcom stars from the past, playing roles very similar to the ones that once made them famous, that undiscerning eyes will readily recognize while they're channel surfing. Causing those eyes to hopefully stop on FX in the midst of seeking out brainless blech.The model in place behind these shows is that if they succeed with their initial 10-episode run, FX will pick them up for an additional 90 episodes. That will then get churned out, factory-style, over the following couple of years. This is the package deal that TBS started with Tyler Perry's Meet the Browns, which spewed out 140 episodes between 2009 and 2011. So far, on FX, Anger Management has gotten the full 100 episode order while Saint George, thankfully, did not.Now it's Partners' turn to go for the gold.I'll say this: Before I knew that this was another "10 for 90" Franken-show, I definitely liked the idea of a new comedy starring Kelsey Grammer and Martin Lawrence. I enjoy both of them and thought that the pairing could be funny. Then I learned about the syndication order model and promptly got that "uh oh" feeling in my gut. Then I actually watched the first two episodes (which premiere Monday, August 4th) and the results were so much worse than anything possibly anticipated. In fact, after watching them, I told IGN TV Executive Editor Eric Goldman that I'd review the premiere if - IF - he watched it too. To share in the pain. As of yet, I don't think he's held up his end of the bargain. But, upon reflection, I've also deemed it too cruel a request.Partners is a putrid, lazy swamp of a series. Even for those of you who are no longer (or never have been) a fan of the multi-camera traditional sitcom format, this is a new level of terrible. Most modern era multi-cam sitcoms fall under the realm of being okay, but this is an unexpected low. Not that anything can take away Work It's crown of agony , but Partners, while not carelessly meandering into offensive territory, provides its own package of disappointment. Namely because of the names attached.Grammer, as disgraced sleazeball attorney Allen Braddock, is mostly suitable. His biggest cross to bear is the flat dialogue and weak one-liners that are supposed to serve as our "jokes." Not that Grammer hasn't starred, since the days of Cheers and Frasier, in his own share of failed comedies, but he's the one who's fallen the most here. No one expects him to repeat the genius of those two shows, but no one also expected him to tumble this far down the totem pole.Lawrence, who stars as do-right neighborhood attorney Marcus Jackson, is the series' ultimate failure. Because not only is his character written to be the least present, least engaging, and least humorous, Lawrence himself feels barely present; often slurring his words, barely animate with his expressions. A true sleepwalk of a performance. His character exists mainly to constantly react to Grammer's Braddock and call him a bad person. Even though, by TV comedy standards, Braddock isn't even all that comically reprehensible.The premiere episode, "They Come Together," feels unpolished and devoid of care. As if it were written quickly one afternoon during a hurried lunch break. Jackson, on the eve of divorcing his wife, feels passive and numb (aligning with Lawrence's own performance) while his soon to be ex is poised to take most of everything he owns. Enter Grammer's recently fired Braddock, who offers to help shark out a fairer arrangement in exchange for dumping some "pro bono" work off on Jackson. Jackson thinks Braddock is slimy, Jackson's family (Telma Hopkins and Danièle Watts) thinks Jackson's a pent-up boob, and 22 minutes trudge by without a single, solitary pity-laugh.