Brett McGinness

USA TODAY

Bucking recent poll numbers, Bernie Sanders pulled off a narrow upset in Michigan ... but somehow, Hillary Clinton still had a better night. Neither of them did as well as Donald Trump did on Tuesday — he managed to pick up wins in Michigan, Mississippi and Hawaii, and sold $350 worth of steak to the Trump press corps. Last night's results, plus Trump's tiny baby hands, are in today's edition of For the Record.

Copies of 'Trump's Guide to Humility' weren't unavailable

Donald Trump's presidential campaign/infomercial rolls on, claiming big victories last night in Michigan (12-point win), Mississippi (11 points) and Hawaii (still counting, but let's say 12ish). He now has more than one-third of the delegates needed to claim the GOP nomination in July. Trump's Tuesday night news conference in Jupiter, Florida served as a rebuttal to Mitt Romney, who earlier in the week called Trump a "fraud" and a failed businessman — on display at the presser were Trump Steaks, Trump Ice bottled water, bottles from Trump Winery and a copy of Trump Magazine. He offered to sell the steaks to the assembled press for $50 each, but offered wine bottles for free. "And Trump University, we're going to start it up as soon as I win the lawsuit," he said.

Ted Cruz took Idaho and finished second in the other three states, but he seems to be the Jack In The Box tacos of the GOP race — not a bad backup choice for a hangry electorate, but Ted Cruz tacos aren't really why they showed up. Meanwhile, Marco Rubio and John Kasich continue to be the kale smoothie stand next door, with everyone wondering how much longer they're going to manage to stay in business.

Sanders wins headlines, Clinton wins delegates

Everyone thought Hillary Clinton would roll to a victory in Michigan last night, including Bernie Sanders. By the time the race was called — a narrow 1.6% win for Sanders — Bernie's rally in Miami was already over. What happened to the poll numbers? It's a problem that plagues modern polling: How do you conduct phone polls when the electorate is cutting land lines, switching to cellphones and screening off unknown numbers? Polling firms could conduct a poll to see what poll-takers think, but that probably wouldn't accomplish anything.

Everyone thought that Hillary Clinton would pick up a huge win in Mississippi, including Bernie Sanders. And they were right! Way, way, way right — a 66-point win. Nice work, pollsters! You went 1-for-2. The narrow Michigan loss plus the big Mississippi win means that even though Bernie is generating buzz for an unexpected win, Hillary picked up more delegates on Tuesday. Now the Democratic race looks ahead to next Tuesday, with Florida, Illinois, Missouri, North Carolina and Ohio. Team Clinton has to hope those poll numbers are accurate.

In their defense, the odds that Hillary would start talking about hand size were slim

Cable news airtime is a valuable commodity, so it's rare that candidates go head-to-head on victory/concession/rally speeches — especially now that the race is down to just six major-party candidates. But as Trump's lengthy press conference evolved into a pitch for Trump™ lifestyle products, Hillary launched into her speech at a rally in Cleveland. And every major network stayed with Trump. Perhaps the network producers were hoping reporters would come back to the studio with steaks and wine.

More from the campaign trail

The Better Business Bureau gives Trump University an A+ because all the complaints against it are too old (USA TODAY)

Bush joins Cruz's team. Not that Bush. Nope, not that one either (USA TODAY OnPolitics)

Ohio may be Kasich's last chance to avoid going 0-for-2016 (Milwaukee Journal Sentinel)

How to watch Wednesday night's Democratic debate (USA TODAY OnPolitics)

Nightmare fuel

We admit we didn't stay up late just to see Hawaii's results. We saw Ellen Degeneres' video clip of Donald Trump's baby hands and now we see it every time we close our eyes.