In the world of System Shock, the evil mega-corporation known as TriOptimum is indirectly responsible for the near-destruction of Earth, humanity, and at one point the literal fabric of reality. If it were a real company, I would be totally on board with that, as long as it sold this laptop.

The machine above is what you'll get if you pledge $5,000 or more to the recently launched System Shock reboot Kickstarter. It's a TriOptimum-themed version of the Razer Blade, one of the better-looking gaming laptops in its own right:

But look at that classy geometric logo! When you open it up, look at the soft shades lighting your keys, instead of Razer's venomous green!

Most gaming laptops look aggressive, like you're trying to be the roughest customer at your local LAN party. The TriOptimum Blade, despite being based on a video game in which you fight cyborg ninjas with a laser sword, is above all that. It is beautiful, menacing, and would probably make me feel like a super cool hacker whenever I opened up the HTML view on our post editor to fix some broken italics tags.

Unless Razer ends up selling these outside Kickstarter — which, to be clear, isn't actually a store — it appears that there will be 50 of these things in existence. Nobody should spend $5,000 to "buy" one, instead of looking at that money as a donation to Night Dive. But I have never wanted a Kickstarter reward, or a gaming laptop, more.

Update: As someone pointed out, the laptop render says "Tripotimum," which my mind accidentally corrected on first viewing. This means that it's actually a replica of a black-market Chiba City hacker laptop based on the TriOptimum brand, which makes me like it even more. Thanks, Michael.

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