When Massachusetts Attorney General Martha Coakley isn't ruining peoples lives or blowing Senate races, she's attacking social problems that don't exist—like the latest teen trend of drinking huge cans of pomegranate flavored malt liquor. Sure, no one is actually drinking "Blast," Colt .45's new and obviously disgusting flavored beer, but Coakley and 18 other AGs suspect that children will go mad for giant, "brightly colored" cans of the watermelon brew.

Massachusetts Attorney General Martha Coakley, along with 18 other Attorneys General, today called on Pabst Brewing Company to stop selling or alter its new malt drink beverage, Blast by Colt 45, because of its high alcohol content and marketing tactics. The drink, known as "binge-in-a-can," offers the equivalent of five beers in one serving. The Attorneys General also are concerned that the product is being marketed and packaged in a way that targets underage youth. Earlier this month, Pabst introduced its Blast by Colt 45 as a flavored malt beverage in fruit flavors of grape, strawberry lemonade, strawberry watermelon, and blueberry pomegranate, with an alcohol concentration of 12% in brightly colored 23.5 ounce single serving cans. This means that each single serving contains the equivalent of nearly five servings of alcohol. Anyone who consumes a can of Blast within an hour will have engaged in binge drinking as defined by The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

Ban it! And while you're at it, Martha, why not ban flavored vodka? Or Godiva liqueur? After all, kids love chocolate. And kids also love Snoop Dog, who signed on as Blast's spokesman.

The press release claims that the drink is "known as binge-in-a-can," though the only reference I can find to this clunky sobriquet is from …Martha Coakley who, as quoted in the very same press release, moans that "the promotion of this 'binge-in-a-can' is aimed at the youngest of drinkers as well as underage youth."

Reason on the (successful) war against Fourloko.