I’m still not entirely sure why my parents bought me this for Christmas. More confounding still was when, upon noticing my confused reaction as I gingerly removed the costume from the box, my mother whispered in my ear, “You’re gonna get so fucking crazy laid in this at the dungeon that the dom is going to have to beat the deranged chicks off you with a cast-iron ping pong paddle. Trust me, son. Just trust me.”

[via ohmygolly]