Tucker Carlson, Fox News talking head and human equivalent of beer pong, got his full grown man feelings hurt this week when someone dared to hold him accountable for his words and actions. The folks over at Media Matters unearthed and hosed off some of Carlson’s weekly appearances on, I can’t believe I have to write this, The Bubba The Love Sponge Show.

Mr. Sponge, in case you are unaware, is the radio shock jock who is previously best known for being a bargain bin Howard Stern and letting Hulk Hogan sleep with his wife while he secretly recorded them. The release of the Hogan tape ultimately lead to the lawsuit that ended Gawker. It seems that a larval Tucker Carlson was a frequent guest of Mr. Sponge for several years.

During his visits, usually conducted via phone, the two held forth on the trenchant topics of the day like U.S. monetary policy and the role of NATO. Just kidding, they called women the c-word and defended child rape. No foolin'.

During this idiot’s Algonquin round table, Mr. Carlson and Mr. Sponge spewed forth a righteous stream of racism and misogyny. For example, Carlson used the forum to stick up for pedophile cult leader Warren Jeffs and to describe Iraqis, citizens of a country we invaded and destabilized based on a lie, “semiliterate primitive monkeys”.

As you can imagine, advertisers are not beating down the door to have their brands represented by Tucker Carlson. At last check, the only remaining sponsors of the Tucker Carlson White Guy Variety Hour are a company that makes frat paddles and that MyPillow creep.

Being held accountable for things he has said and done is, according to Tucker Carlson, bullying. For all of Fox News bloviating about “snowflakes” and participation trophies, they sure do like to play the victim.

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