I hate to admit that I was beginning to lose hope as my SS kept me anxiously awaiting a change my in gift status to "shipped". Lo & behold, one hour prior to the end of the cutoff, the elusive package icon became flush with color! I can say with confidence that my SS took so long to ship because they were carefully reviewing my Reddit history (*cringe). The gits were spot on!

1: A package of candy canes for my kids (of which I shameless partook).

2: A book authored by non other than P.J. O'Rourke: Parliament of Whores (I am a self-professed political junkie).

3: A journal which will finally provide me a doodling alternative to my already abused notepad (who am I kidding, to every sliver of paper I see).

4: A friggin pen with a laser pointer and two led lights built-in. That's right folks, pick your jaws back up. I write for a living, and this bad boy will allow me recklessly tear the pages into the wee hours of the night, and then without missing a beat to turn the pen around and present the finer nuances of my groundbreaking works via the stealth laser pointer embedded in the pen.

To my SS. You did not PM me, reach out to me, or provide me the faintest clue of your identity. Despite this, I commit to you that when I utilize the knowledge gained from the book you sent, to write a best-selling novel with the super-pen you bestowed upon me onto the pages of the journal that you so graciously endowed upon me, fueled only by the endless bounds of energy derived from candy cane goodness: I will dedicate that book to MYSTERY SS.