FEATURE: A definitive ranking of Ireland's 28 favourite biscuits

28. Pink Wafers

They're grand if you like sawdust that tastes like Calpol.

Awful things.

27. Iced Rings

Might as well eat six sugar cubes.

26. Bourbon Creams

Funeral biscuits.

25. Ginger Nuts

Tasty enough, but they're like biting into a brick.

24. Rich Tea

They're biscuits for people who are denying the fact that they want a real biscuit.

23. Lemon Puffs

If the mark of a good biscuit is its dunkability (not a word? we don't care) in tea, then the Lemon Puff fails every time.

22. Coconut Creams

Pointless.

21. Fox's Jam 'n Cream

20. Hob Nobs

The worst thing they ever did to the Hob Nob was to create the Chocolate Hob Nob.

19. Digestives

Great for tea, don't get us wrong, but nothing special of itself.

18. Jammie Dodgers

They look better than they taste, in truth.

17. Kimberleys

A deserved place in the top 20. An Irish staple.

16. Fig Rolls

You need to eat them fresh - when they go a bit stale they're disgusting.

15. Jersey Creams

"Ah here, Granny, seriously? Where's the good stuff?"

14. Maryland chocolate chip cookies

Inexpensive and they get the job done.

13. Custard Creams

The 1980s are alive and well and living in your mother's biscuit tin.

12. Caramel Digestives

11. Chocolate Polos

All biscuits are better with chocolate, and the same goes for the Polo. The best use of coconut since the Mikado.

10. Fox's Crunch Creams

These are what come out of the press when the mother has visitors over, and she tells the da to take out "the good biscuits."

9. Toffypops

Solid, dependable, will never really trouble the top five. They're the Everton of the biscuit world, pun intended.

8. Cadbury's Chocolate Rich Tea

Well la-di-da, your majesty.

7. Chocolate Kimberleys

Every Christmas, obliterated. We remember a life before the Chocolate Kimberley; it was dark and full of terrors.

6. Chocolate Digestives

They don't need the caramel, when you think about it. Less is more. Perfect with tea, coffee, on their own, served on a sea of perfume floating in a man's hat, whatever...

5. Chocolate Fingers

We have never once felt guilty about destroying an entire packet in the space of 13 minutes.

4. Chocolate Hobnobs

King of the Hobnobs.

3. Jaffa Cakes

They're biscuits, right? End of discussion. And they're feckin' fantastic.

2. Mint Viscounts

This, THIS close to the number one spot, but it got knocked off because a couple of people in the office don't like them. A plague on both their houses.

1. Fox's Chunkie Cookies - the best biscuits in Ireland

Perhaps not the traditional choice, but they're better than any other biscuit on the market today. Loads of bite, plenty of chocolate chips, perfect with a beverage. A deserved winner.

**KLAXON: We forgot the Mikado. Definitely top ten, we love a Mikado, the journalist has been sent home and told to go straight to his room (with a packet of shitty pink wafers)**