As everyone knows, it’s April Fools’ Day. With whoopee cushions galore, this was a day to be celebrated when we were younger, but as adults in the legal profession, the idea of pranking coworkers has lost its appeal in favor of the almighty billable hour.

Out of all of the pomp and circumstance associated with Biglaw, one firm — one of the most prestigious firms in the business, mind you — doesn’t take itself so seriously that it’s above playing a yearly trick on its associates. Each year, the firm sends out an April Fools’ email, which is usually met with a chuckle or two. Unfortunately, this year’s joke was no laughing matter to some of the associates who received it.

The firm in question is Weil Gotshal, and this year, the arbiters of the firm’s annual April Fools’ email decided it would be in good fun to announce a new email policy similar to those considered or adopted in Europe. In France and Germany, for example, emails to employees after work hours have been banned, or may soon be banned. Doesn’t that sound awesome? In a world where Biglaw associates have been directed to CHECK YOU EMAILS OFTEN, a respite from constant inbox assaults would be most welcomed.

In its firmwide April Fools’ email, entitled “Important New Email Policy,” Weil purportedly agreed to embrace work/life balance policies similar to those that have been foisted upon firms across the pond. Here’s just a snippet from Weil’s faux email policy:

(1) Email will not be transmitted between 11:00 p.m. and 6:00 a.m. This will be implemented in the local time zone for each Weil office. This will be the default email setting, subject to opt-outs as described below. (2) Emails will not be transmitted between 11:00 p.m. Friday and 6:00 a.m. Monday, also implemented in the local time zone for each Weil office and also subject to opt out. (3) When an employee is on vacation, no emails will be transmitted from 11:00 p.m. on the day prior to start of vacation to 6:00 a.m. on the first day back at work after vacation. All emails during this time will be automatically responded to with a message that the recipient is on vacation and not receiving emails, and the name, email address and telephone number of a designated substitute for the duration of the vacation.

If that sounds too good to be true, it’s because it is. While some employees at Weil took the email seriously at first blush and wrote to us lauding the firm in the hope of policies like this becoming an industry norm, others caught wise to the fact that this was a cruel joke much more quickly — and to say they’re pissed would be an understatement. Here’s a sample of some of the responses we’ve received to Weil’s April Fools’ email:

* Please get ahold of Weil’s April fools email. It’s awful and associates are pissed. * If this is true, it’s awesome. If it’s a joke, it’s the worst joke of all time. Especially to someone like me who has been billing 12-16 hour days recently and gets a lot of late night and weekend emails. * I think associates are annoyed enough that there will be follow up at some point. * Hopefully if this is a joke, you publishing it will do something to let them know this is a f*cked-up joke. * April Fools! We don’t really give a shit about you! Now get back to billing. * You must read the last sentence of this ridiculous email. Weil is making a mockery of our hard work.

What does the last sentence of Weil’s email say? “We are proud to be taking a leadership role in caring about our colleagues’ quality of life.” Wow. We think that says it all.

It’s important for us to note here that year after year, young Biglaw associates chasing the billable hours dragon work themselves to death. Their firms politely announce the deaths, mention that the deceased associate was well-liked among colleagues, and then move along, shoving weeks of non-stop billing down the next associate’s throat. If firms like Weil truly cared about their “colleagues’ quality of life,” then a firmwide email like this one — one that borders on offensive and crosses the line on insensitivity — wouldn’t have been sent as a joke. This isn’t funny. No one is laughing at Weil’s “f*cked-up joke.”

When we reached out to Weil for confirmation that their “important new email policy” was a joke, we also wondered whether Weil would like to comment on the fact that its employees were upset that the firm would make a joke out of a policy that would have such a serious, positive effect on work/life balance. The firm very quickly told us that this was, in fact, a joke, but never responded to our other, more important inquiry.

In the end, we all know that working in Biglaw can be incredibly stressful, and in some cases, deleterious to your health. What’s important to remember is that no one — not even a firm that purports to care about your quality of life — is going to care about your well-being as much as you do. As is evident here, work/life balance is just a joke to them. Please take care of yourselves, associates, because we’re sorry to say that your firm won’t.

UPDATE (4:30 p.m.): It seems that management at Weil Gotshal finally realized that this April Fools’ joke wasn’t very funny. Barry Wolf, the firm’s executive partner, issued this email in response to the many complaints received throughout the day.

(Flip to the next page to see the full April Fools’ memo from Weil Gotshal.)