Don’t hate me because I’m beautiful

Making peace with my bare face

Story by Cynthia Schroeder

“Are you okay?” “Did you have a rough night at work?” “Are you feeling under the weather?” These are a few of the comments I’m met with daily if I choose not to wear makeup to school. There must be something about my naturally oily skin and lack of eyebrows that makes me look like I’m on the brink of death. I know they mean well but what they don’t know is that one comment like this can make me feel like I have leprosy the rest of the day.

Most of my classes start at 8 a.m. As my alarm goes off at 6:30, I have to make a decision — I can sleep for 30 more minutes, which could make a difference in how alert I am during statistics class, or I can go through my daily hair and makeup routine which would take the same amount of time. I usually give into my groggy state and skip the beauty routine altogether.

I’ve always been a pretty girl. My dad is a handsome, former bodybuilder and I inherited some of my mom’s beautiful indigenous Mexican features. I’ve always felt the need to maintain the reputation of being the pretty, put together girl. Wearing make-up and having nice hair became my identity. If I wasn’t the walking epitome of glamour, I didn’t feel like myself.

When I first began college at 18, there was no way that I would leave my house without foundation, compact, eyebrow pencil, mascara, bronzer and lipstick. You read that correctly. If I had an 8 a.m. class, you better believe I was awake at 5:30 a.m. to shower, blow dry my hair and go through my aforementioned extensive makeup routine. It was so important to me to make my face look as thin as possible, my lips plump, and my eyes wide.

To add more pressure to my situation, I began modeling last year in vintage style photos. My friends and family would tell me repeatedly how shocked they were to see how good I looked in these photos, particularly how different I looked. I’m expected to look like my modeling pictures all of the time. People I know, especially those I’ve recently met at school, will see my pictures and tell me, “I can’t believe that’s you!” I can never tell if they are disappointed by the stark contrast between my bare face and Photoshopped face, or if they’re impressed.

Although I haven’t acquired any serious level of fame through my modeling (having 1,000 followers on Instagram doesn’t exactly make me TMZ material), I can sympathize with the famous women being ridiculed on countless magazine covers for not wearing makeup. You know you’re guilty of picking up the magazine with Katy Perry on the cover with no makeup. It’s fascinating to see what celebrities look like underneath it all – no expensive HD makeup and Photoshop – but there’s a bigger issue here.

We’re teaching our girls that they can’t be as beautiful as Katy Perry without makeup because not even Katy Perry is that beautiful without makeup. We groom them from a young age to be insecure.

Now at 20, there are many times that I prefer going out bare faced. I notice that when I don’t wear makeup, I’m forced to spend a little more time on my skin care routine, ultimately giving me healthier looking skin. It’s actually nice to let your skin breathe for a while. As cheesy as it sounds, I enjoy driving with my windows down and letting the sun hit my bare face.

More important than that, I am comfortable with how I look. I don’t hate what I see when I look in the mirror anymore. I have accepted the reflection that jumps back at me for its genetic advantages and disadvantages. No matter how hard I try to banish them for good, I will always have blackheads and I will never have full eyebrows and I’m okay with that. If I’m perfectly comfortable with my bare face, then you should be too.

Note from the author: We’ve seen celebrities do it on Instagram. Now it’s your turn to post your bare naked beauty. Hashtag your photos at #barenakedbeauty

Substance is a publication of the Mt. San Antonio College Journalism Program. The program recently moved its newsroom over to Medium as part of a one-year experiment. Read about it here: https://medium.com/substance/the-experiment-be947b2ba13e