Tuesday, November 4, 2008



The lasting effect of spanking



Lost trust



Neglect is not the only alternative to spanking (I wrote more about this in my Discipline Spectrum post)



Link between spousal abuse and spanking



Escalation from small tap for big behavioural problem to routine abuse



Link between spanking and sexual molestation and sexual development



Physical dangers of hitting the buttocks and the hands



Dangers of shaking



Link between spanking and poor performance at school



Link between spanking and smoking, drinking and drugs



Link between spanking and criminal behaviour



Link between spanking and prejudice



Link between spanking and brain development



Spanking at school



Q: What do virtually all juvenile delinquents have in common?

A: They have been raised by spankers.



Q: What was a common feature of the childhoods of Hitler, Stalin, Pol Pot, Saddam Hussein and Charles Manson?

A: Each one was relentlessly, severely, physically punished.



Q: What do most prisoners on death row have in common?

A: Plenty of spankings during childhood.



Q: What do rapists, arsonists, terrorists, torturers, serial killers, mass murderers, suicide bombers, kidnappers, snipers, assassins, muggers, vandals, spouse batterers and stalkers have in common?

A: Violent upbringing.



Q: Which child is destined never to join the company of felons?

A: One who is raised in a nurturing, attentive, supportive, non-spanking family.



Q: To turn a friendly puppy into a vicious guard dog, what must you do to it?

A: Restrict its movement and beat it often.



Hitting Models Hitting

Hitting Devalues the Child

Hitting Devalues the Parent

Hitting May Lead to Abuse (my personal opinion is that it is abuse)

Hitting Does Not Improve Behaviour

Hitting is Actually Not Biblical

Hitting Promotes Anger in Parents and Children

Hitting Brings Back Bed Memories

Abusive Hitting Has Bad Long-Term Effects

Abusive Hitting has Bad Long

Spanking Does Not Work



The science also shows that corporal punishment is like smoking: It's a rare human being who can refrain from stepping up from a mild, relatively harmless dose to an excessive and harmful one. Three cigarettes a month won't hurt you much, and a little smack on the behind once a month won't harm your child. But who smokes three cigarettes a month? To call corporal punishment addictive would be imprecise, but there's a strong natural tendency to escalate the frequency and severity of punishment. More than one-third of all parents who start out with relatively mild punishments end up crossing the line drawn by the state to define child abuse: hitting with an object, harsh and cruel hitting, and so on. Children, endowed with wonderful flexibility and ability to learn, typically adapt to punishment faster than parents can escalate it, which helps encourage a little hitting to lead to a lot of hitting. And, like frequent smoking, frequent corporal punishment has serious, well-proven bad effects.

I know that I am often preaching the the choir here. Many of my readers have similar values and parenting approaches to me. However, we are all often in situations where we want to be able to share rational arguments in support of non-violent parenting to those that may not be aware of the consequences of spanking. To help me and help you to spread the message that spanking is harmful, I've compiled some of my favourite anti-spanking resources.This great resource prepared by Project No Spank summarizes a variety of research on the harmful effects of spanking. It starts with a great explanation of why "I was spanked and I turned out okay" isn't a good reason to hit your kids. It then goes on to present a list of facts about spanking, including:It then includes a series of quotes from experts about spanking and has links to a number of articles that they have written on the topic too. That is followed by these questions and answers:Finally, the document ends with information on what you can do to help () and some additional resources for further study.The AskDrSears Web site has a great article on spanking that includes reasons not to hit your child, admonitions of parents who spank, and signs you need professional help about discipline. The reasons not to hit your child (explained in more detail in the article) are:This Mothering Magazine article exclaims shock at the fact that in 2000, 61 percent of parents claimed to spank their children. It links the need to spank children with wildly inaccurate understanding of what age appropriate behaviour is. The parents that spanked often felt that a 6 month old child could be "spoiled" and had other inappropriate expectations of their children. It then explains some of the problems with spanking (similar to those raised in the other articles) and then goes on to explain healthier alternatives to spanking.This article by Alan Kazdin uses a great analogy. I'll let it speak for itself:The article also talks about the ill-effects of spanking and raises the point that scientists that have done this research have not been as vocal about it as proponents of spanking have been. Also parents often see the temporary compliance that results from spanking as a sign of "success", not realizing that this short-term gain has lots of long-term negative consequences (again, the reason we need to focus on long-term parenting versus short-term parenting ).The article also talks about the fact that 91 countries have banned corporal punishment in schools andand another 20, including Canada , are considering bans. It talks about the fact that the United Nations has set 2009 as a goal date for eliminating violence against children (that's next year!).I hope you enjoy the articles and find a gently convincing way to share them with people that might be persuaded that spanking is not the best option for disciplining their children. Please pass the word along!