When it happened to me, the most shocking aspect was discovering the speed at which financial problems can spiral out of control. Having lost your job, you fall behind on one payment, then another, and the letters and phone calls begin coming in thick and fast. You start hearing from mortgage and utility providers, and those with whom you have loan and hire-purchase arrangements, and that's without the calls from people collecting payments like insurance, school fees and property tax.

None of these callers are happy with you, and in some cases, you may find their tone and attitude quite hostile. It's hard not to take it all personally, or understand that they are probably under pressure themselves to achieve results and safeguard their own jobs.

When the company I worked for closed down in 2002, a year after I bought my house and car, I applied for hundreds of jobs and immediately began "temping," earning €10 per hour. I wasn't unemployed but my mortgage alone was €900 per month, so you wouldn't need to be David McWilliams to work out that I'd soon encounter trouble. My family and friends were amazingly supportive and did everything they could to help, but I was ashamed and hid the true extent of the problem from them.

I followed the advice that you should negotiate with your creditors, but I didn't find this a particularly helpful process until I started earning properly again. In the interim, all projected repayments were speculative, and ultimately not feasible.

Your home is your sanctuary, so when "credit control" people knock on the door, it feels hugely invasive. I'd stand behind the kitchen door, scarcely daring to breathe, until they went away. Sometimes they'd wait outside in their cars, while I crawled along the floor to peep out the living room window to see if they were gone. In the end, I found the Government's debt management agency, MABS, to be very helpful in negotiating with people on my behalf.

A representative from my mortgage provider frequently turned up at my door early in the morning, and would threaten me with repossession in earshot of neighbours bringing children to school. My car tax was always in arrears, so I would drive along praying I wouldn't meet a garda checkpoint. My house insurance and health insurance had to go, my social life was curtailed, and I still owe about six years of birthday and wedding presents to friends.

I thank my lucky stars that I'm a mentally stable person who has thankfully never suffered from depression or anxiety issues, but I was constantly worried and down about the situation. Many of you reading this will understand the feeling, as figures released by the Central Bank showed that 117,889, or 15.5pc, of principal dwelling mortgage accounts were in arrears by the end of September 2014. A further 38,463 buy-to-let mortgages (26.8pc) had also fallen behind.

I found myself at a Circuit Court hearing for the repossession of my house in 2008, when I had mortgage arrears of €6,000. As I couldn't afford legal representation, I had to speak for myself, but found the judge extremely kind and sympathetic. While the provider pushed to repossess, the judge didn't allow it, as he noted that I was on a more stable footing and had reduced the arrears from their original figure. He ruled that I would repay the arrears by paying extra monthly, and in 2012, the case was finally struck out.

I thought back to that stressful time when I read about the dreadfully sad murder-suicide case this week in Cobh, Co Cork, where physiotherapist Michael Greaney ended the lives of both himself and his wife Valerie with a knife, and critically injured their 21-year-old daughter, Michelle. Mr Greaney had been treated at the Central Mental Hospital in 2013 after an attack on a young woman, which followed a period in which he suffered insomnia, depression and stress over financial problems. The 53-year-old had been involved in litigation with three different banks, and apparently feared the family home would be lost in High Court proceedings initiated shortly before Christmas.

While my experience taught me not to fear the court system, my heart went out to this man because he was probably paralysed with dread and terror. Being in debt seeps into every aspect of your life, shames you, and can destroy your confidence, creativity and happiness. In some circumstances, particularly where mental health issues and lack of sleep are involved, it can prove catastrophic, which may have been the case with poor, tormented Michael Greaney.

Financial stresses can also affect your ability to take care of physical and emotional health. This is borne out by a survey conducted this week by Ballsbridge dental surgery, MyDental, which revealed that almost 60pc of people surveyed felt the recession had an impact on their dental health, with 34pc reporting that it adversely affected their mental health.

Even if you are lucky enough to withstand the pressure of debt, it can be hard to gather your shaky self-confidence and start all over again. It is, however, the only way the problem will ultimately be resolved. In my case, things improved when I began to write, having my first freelance article printed at the age of 35. It took a while to build up a career, but I loved it and felt more fulfilled than ever before. Things are much better for me now and that awful dread is gone, although I'm still not financially stable, as clearing the backlog of arrears on a freelance income means walking a very tight financial tightrope - and I regularly slip off it.

On the positive side, the experience has made me stronger. I learned how to speak up, how to budget and what really mattered in life - my family and friends.

To those of you drowning in debt and opening letters with shaking hands, keep your chin up and know there is always light at the end of the tunnel. You may have to change course and go around a few bends to find it, but if you keep your nerve, seek help, and stay connected to loved ones, you'll find it.

Irish Independent