I have not always been known to be the happiest guy in the world. As a matter of fact, I have been labeled a pessimist, negative Nancy, and even, GASP, a Debbie Downer! All of these by… MY OWN FAMILY! But I have learned how to be happy, however, this does not mean that I always am, but when I am not, it is completely my fault.

Happiness is an elusive commodity in today’s world as we are inundated with images, ideals and lifestyles around us to compare our lives and circumstances too. I have always felt that visual media advances have made this great world we live in harder to be happy in.

Look at the early days of American history, where there were no ways to see how people lived even a couple of hundred miles away without a long journey by horse and buggy. The only way to compare yourself or to know what was out there beyond your own town was to know someone or hear their stories of what was happening “out there.”

Then with the advent of television and movies, people were given a glimpse of the how the “other side” lived, and with this ability came jealousy and the desire to live that way also. Now with the internet and social media being what they are, this has grown into a society of people who compare themselves to others far too much.

I have learned that comparison is the thief of joy and happiness, so I have begun to work on my happiness factors. I have made several changes in my life to become a happier person.

Choose yourself: There is no one on earth like you, so just be yourself with no apologies. The more you try to be what others choose for you, the less happy will be. Stop comparison: Do NOT compare yourself to anyone else. Their circumstances, opportunities and lifestyle are out of your control. When you stop comparing yourself to others, you give yourself permission to be happy. Remember, average people compare themselves to others. This is why they are average. If you want to escape average, don’t compare yourself to average. Live with an “attitude of gratitude”: Whatever it is you are going through, find a way to be grateful. Even if it is being thankful for the energy and ability to work an 80 hour week. Train your brain to think accurately: Without accurate thought, you will never be happy. According to Napoleon Hill, accurate thought involves 2 fundamental things. You must separate facts from information- a lot of information is not based on facts. With the internet and the ease of putting information on it, you can’t believe everything you read. Learn to categorize facts into 2 classes- important and unimportant or relevant and irrelevant. Important facts relate to your specific situation, and unimportant are unrelated to you specifically. Help others- I have never been unhappy when I am helping others. If you focus on helping other people, you choose to live outside of prejudice or fear. Find a way to add value to anyone and everyone around you. Remember the “Golden Rule”, do to others what you would want them to do to you.

Believe me, being happy is a choice, and as you develop these habits, the choice will become much easier. An upside plus to being happier by habit, more people will want to be around you!