I had ten years of four days a week, the first five between eight and twelve years old; the second between 35 and 40. That’s about 2,000 hours. I realized recently that I could summarize what I gained from it in a few bullet points.

Talk about anything on your mind slowly easing slowly into touchier subjects.

Notice counter-productive patterns. Times when you're way too much of something.

Notice that you're way too much of opposite somethings, that you’re too pushy but also too much of a pushover, that you’re insensitive, but also hypersensitive. Dwell on these exotic peculiarities of your unusually-troubled .

With discover that you’re an egotistical hypocrite, deploying the opposites in self-serving ways pushing to get what you want and being a pushover to please people who can help you, or being insensitive about other people’s needs but hypersensitive about your own.

Dwell on your egotism.

Trace it to your particular . Embrace an epic interpretation of what went wrong complete with villains and victims. Dig in hard on this story because that way the big change will come.

Keep waiting for the big change that doesn’t come – a fruitful exercise in futility, because...

…you start to feel awkward awkward about dwelling while everyone else is getting on with their lives. You start to wonder, are you really that unusually troubled?

Discover that problem isn’t just you, it's everyone and the human condition. Get over yourself and your egotistical inability to get over yourself.

Notice that too much of one thing or its opposite is everyone’s problem. We're all trying to tune between opposites given the circumstances, and of course, sometimes go too far in either direction. Drop your epic story since everybody has one. Spend your life trying to tune right to different circumstances.