TORONTO – Ontario Premier Doug Ford and the Progressive Conservatives played out their school-yard fantasy today, by firing taking 10,000 teaching jobs away from the education system by 2024-2025, while having fun on their summer break.

“I thought extending summer break would be just the coolest, but that was only the beginning folks, down with homework!” said the Premier while visibly struggling to poke his straw into his Tropical Punch flavoured Kool-Aid Jammer.

The move was announced to save the province of Ontario $2.8 Billion over the next 5 fiscal years, which several Progressive Conservative MPPs in bathing suits and water wings claimed was “an added bonus”, poolside.

“This is the best summer ever!” Education Minister Stephen Lecce was quoted as saying before riding the Behemoth at Canada’s Wonderland, for the fifth time in a row.

Political analysts have noted the connection in adding seven weeks to the Ontario Parliament’s summer vacation, and reducing the amount of school teachers in the public system to an unsustainable level, and are dubbing it the “Stop firing yourselves” stratagem.

“I had to hold onto my childhood dream for years to make it come true,” added Ford, “I had to hold onto that hate and pettiness for 27 years. Now future generations will thank me for less school like I wish I had!”