The A’s are going to make the playoffs.

I know. I know. Sounds crazy. Especially if you’ve already written off this season as a bad stretch on the Billy Beane Stock Exchange. But the Athletics are primed for a second-half run to shock the baseball world.

Sure, they have the worst record in the American League. They sit 81/2 games behind the Angels in the A.L. West and eight games back for a wild-card spot. But all they need are a few breaks, and the Beane worship can resume.

How can this happen, you ask? How can the A’s rise from the cellar to play October baseball?

Step 1: Sonny Gray will throw a no-hitter on Friday.

OK, predicting a no-no is a little crazy. But Gray does have a little extra motivation after making the All-Star team and not being able to pitch. Gray was stellar in the first half, entering the break leading American League starters in ERA. He’s been a rock for the A’s.

So it only makes sense that he ignites the spirited second-half rally with a gem. And since A’s manager Bob Melvin is going with a four-man rotation to start the second half, Gray is scheduled to start three of the next 10 games.

Step 2: Stephen Curry and his wife, Ayesha, will attend an A’s game. Some Curry magic is needed for this turnaround. It might even behoove the A’s to let Riley get the mic at the postgame.

Step 3: The bullpen will start clicking.

Dan Otero is back in a middle relief role. The A’s could use the relief. One of the key reasons to the A’s first-half demise was a bad bullpen. They ranked 27th in the majors in save percentage, failing to convert 12 of their 31 save opportunities.

The A’s pitching staff has allowed 302 earned runs, seventh-best in the majors. But 39.4 percent of those were given up by the bullpen. For comparison’s sake, the Kansas City bullpen, best in the majors, is responsible for 23.3 percent of the Royals’ earned runs. St. Louis’ bullpen, not far behind, accounted for 28.8 percent.

But the A’s relievers are about to flip the switch. The trio of lefties at Melvin’s disposal — Eric O’Flaherty, Fernando Abad and Drew Pomeranz — are already clicking. Add right-hander Otero to the mix, and the A’s have enough setup men to get to Tyler Clippard, who has been a revelation at closer.

Then, Sean Doolittle is going to come back with a vengeance. This time, he’ll manage to stay off the disabled list for more than one game and give the A’s more lefty prowess.

Step 4: Minnesota and Houston will fall apart. The Astros have been diving for some time now. The Twins benefitted from a home-heavy first half (47 games, tied for second most in the A.L.) — 31 of their 49 wins have come at home. But the road is waiting. This will pave the way for an A’s wild card.

Step 5: Beane will pull off a move to give the A’s a jolt. While everyone is wondering if he’s going to sell the farm at the trade deadline, Beane will raise some eyebrows with a move no one expected, one that bolsters the team now instead of for the future.

Admit it. Right now, you’re thinking, “Hmmm. Who really could use Ben Zobrist?”

Step 6: Josh Reddick will stop snitching on Melvin.

Step 7: Coco Crisp will return and supercharge the A’s offense.

Oakland hasn’t been too bad at the plate. The A’s are sixth in the majors in runs scored. But they are just 15th in on-base percentage.

Crisp — hampered by a neck injury, with kidney stones adding to the torture — has been a nonfactor this season. He’s played in just 13 games, managing two hits in 45 at bats. But that is going to change. And when it does, it will be a fitting symbol of the A’s second-half theme.

Step 8: The A’s will not make an error in the second half. OK, fewer than 30. After a MLB-high 82 in the first half, they’re due for some lucky bounces.

Step 9: It’s at this point Lew Wolff will announce that he and his ownership group will use their seemingly endless resources to privately finance a waterfront stadium for the A’s in Oakland. And at the news conference, he will take a knee while tearfully apologizing for ever attempting to flee to San Jose and beg Oakland to forgive him.

Step 10: You get a Billy Beane tattoo.

Read Marcus Thompson II’s blog at blogs.mercurynews.com/thompson. Contact him at mthomps2@bayareanewsgroup.com. Follow him on Twitter at twitter.com/ThompsonScribe.