South Region

#1) Kansas: Jim Caldwell - Looks like the nervous armored car driver transporting his largest and last delivery, suspicious his new partner might be up to something. Jay Cutler is his new partner.

#2) Villanova: Jay Cutler - Looks like the guy trying to break into a house on an alarm company commercial.

#3) Miami: Tom Thibodeau - Looks like the guy in an antacid commercial uncomfortably eating a chili dog while pulling at his collar for relief.

#4) California: Wade Phillips - Looks like the Bank Security guard who gives up his gun after robbers get a jump on him by putting a banana to his neck.

#5) Maryland: Paul Finebaum - Looks like the human version of the NCAA rule book.

#6) Arizona: Jim Caldwell - Looks like the guy answering the door at 3 am who instantly realizes the policeman there is going to give him life-changing bad news.

#7) Iowa: Pete Carroll - Face looks like a mask a bank robber would wear.

#8) Colorado: Bartolo Colon - Looks like the last Mohican, who ate the second to last Mohican.

#9) Connecticut: Joe Torre - Looks like the guy who enters the sauna wearing a gold chain and takes off his towel in the middle of the sauna while walking towards the open bench across from you, and sits down next to Wade Phillips.

#10) Temple: Wade Phillips - Looks like a guy who can't figure out how the critters are getting under the fence.

#11) Vanderbilt: Steve Kerr - Looks like the guy who starts practicing his golf swing mid-conversation.

#11) Wichita State: Greg Olsen - Looks like He-Man if he moved to Portland and opened a store that sells artisanal jams.

#12) South Dakota State: Jay Gruden - Looks like a flashy local realtor whose photo on the bus stop seat keeps getting defaced with horns and a mustache.

#13) Hawaii: Lane Kiffin - Is the boater who throttles up in a no wake zone because he sees Jim Tomsula fishing with a Snoopy pole in a row boat.

#14) Buffalo: Brian Dawkins - Looks like the guy at church who points to the sky with his eyes closed biting his lip and crying.

#15) UNC Asheville: Matthew Stafford - Looks like your friend's friend who uses your bathroom, comes out fifteen minutes later and asks, "Do you have a plunger?"

#16) Austin Peay: Ty Lawson - Looks like the DirecTV installer who shows up to your house an hour late and claims he has the wrong equipment and has to reschedule.

West Region

#1) Oregon: Russell Wilson - Looks like a dolphin trainer.

#2) Oklahoma: Wade Phillips - Looks like someone you would find on a bottle of BBQ Sauce.

#3) Texas A&M: Roy Williams - Looks like the curator of a small-town historical society who patiently gazes out the window for potential visitors all day, sighs, then flips the sign to "CLOSED."

#4) Duke: Dana Holgorsen - Looks like that guy your Dad punched at Steak N' Shake when you were a kid.

#5) Baylor: Barry Melrose - Looks like a former gladiator who won his freedom and now runs a gladiator ring of his own in a backwater town.

#6) Texas: Kurt Warner - Looks like the man emerging from the pool in the "after" portion of the Rogaine ads.

#7) Oregon State: Steve Kerr - Looks like the new young pastor at a church that slowly wins over the old people who don't like change.

#8) Saint Joseph's: Jeff Fisher - Looks like a guy in a Lynyrd Skynyrd shirt shotgunning a beer on the infield of a NASCAR track.

#9) Cincinnati: Chris Kaman - Looks like the butler of a haunted mansion.

#10) VCU: Ned Yost - Looks like every white person's aunt.

#11) Northern Iowa: Charlie Strong - Looks like his name is Charlie Strong.

#12) Yale: Roger Goodell - Looks like the pastor in a town that has banned dancing.

#13) UNC Wilmington: Billy Donavan - Looks like a vampire who woke up in the wrong century.

#14) Green Bay: Jim Harbaugh - Looks like the guy who yells at his wife in front of everyone when they lose at Pictionary on game night.

#15) CSU Bakersfield: Romeo Crennel - Looks like he just watched his neighbor's dog get eaten by an alligator.

#16) Southern: Jeff Van Gundy - Looks like a nervous scientist in a Sci-Fi movie who, after a series of awkward exchanges with the hero, says "I don't get out much."

East Region

#1) North Carolina: Jim Tomsula - Sounds like a monster a creole grandma comes up with to keep kids quiet. Keep quiet or that Jim Tomsula is comin out tha swamp!

#2) Xavier: Jim Tomsula - Looks like the first guy a newly separated mom goes on a date with.

#3) West Virginia: Bo Ryan - Looks like the creepy funeral home director who offers recent widows a shoulder to cry on in an attempt to seduce them.

#4) Kentucky: Jeremy Shockey - Looks like what would happen if Ed Hardy started making people.

#5) Indiana: Jim Tomsula - Looks like the guy riding a wave of water on a float after his above ground pool breaks on America's Funniest Home Videos.

#6) Notre Dame: Jim Tomsula - Looks like a construction worker in an action film shouting "you can't go that way!" as a car blows through a barricade.

#7) Wisconsin: Bret Bielema - Looks like the guy who says "diet starts tomorrow" as he takes a giant bite of a pulled pork sandwich.

#8) USC: Jim Tomsula - Looks like an 80s Olympics bronze medalist shot putter.

#9) Providence: Steve Kerr - Looks like the guy who brushes his teeth in the work bathroom.

#10) Pittsburgh: Joe Buck - Looks like the guy who stops you mid conversation, looks at his phone, and says "I gotta take this, it's the Tampa office."

#11) Michigan: Pablo Torre - Pablo Torre looks like part of the the oddly diverse group of friends pictured in a community college brochure.

#11) Tulsa: Gary Kubiak - Looks like the guy behind the counter at Pep Boys who's trying to convince you that you need four new tires.

#12) Chattanooga: Mike Tomlin - Looks like a courtroom TV judge that has a catch phrase, and uses it outside of work to try to get recognized.

#13) Stony Brook: Jim Tomsula - Looks like the guy that brings doughnuts to work to share, then eats 90 percent of them.

#14) Stephen F. Austin: Jimmy Graham - Looks like a default created player in a video game.

#15) Weber State: Stan Kroenke - Looks like a character from the Beastie Boys "Sabotage" video.

#16) FGCU: Jim Tomsula - Looks like the general manager for a regional bologna distributor.

#16) Farleigh Dickinson: Jim Tomsula - Looks like the guy cooking up hot dogs at the street stand at 4 am when you get out of the club.