Regular readers of Snowblog will know of my devotion, nay love affair, with Apple products. Not any more. My broken blogging heart is sore this morn. As I write this on my faithful MacBook Pro, the tears trickle down my inkless cheeks. I have been slighted by the author of my computing affections. In short, Apple has gone to my core.

For three years I have basked in the robust dependability of my Mac Air…the slighter, slimmer form of iBook. I have taken it from Pakistan to India, from Washington to the Haiti earthquake, from Gaza’s border to Alaska. Never a problem, not one. Wherever I travelled, it travelled – most recently to Cape Cod. A few days ago I suffered the failure of the tiny 3mm spring that keeps the action bar beneath the mouse pad balanced. Small thing – let’s get it fixed.

Not so fast Apple lover-boy! I go to London’s Tottenham Court Road, where I have often bought Apple things. The engineers assess the problem.

“I’m sorry – to replace your 3mm spring you will have to buy a completely new deck, mousepad, bar, and keyboard,” they say.

Cost? Since you ask, £205! Two hundred and five pounds. I glimpse the notice on the wall : ‘We will not tolerate aggressive or abusive behaviour’. No wonder!

I have tumbled into the badly kept secret of Apple spares. Understandably, this brilliant corporation ensures that Apple users can ONLY use Apple spares. Consequently if they make the replacement of a tiny 3mm spring conditional upon buying the entire caboodle…so be it.

Well Apple, think again. This is a nasty bruise, a seeping blemish on your beauteous platinum countenance. I love your products enough to buy a 3G wi-fi top of the range iPad. You have me hostage. But I am suffering no Stockholm syndrome.

I’m not going Apple native, nor am I going quietly. I’m paying up but with my broken heart in need of a lot more than a 3mm spring.

Drat, I’ve just remembered – your policy appears to be that if one of my heart valves goes, I have to buy a new fascia, throat, lungs, oh and throw in the heart too. Have a heart Apple! God knows you can afford it!