Raw transcript of the Katawa Shoujo alpha scene "Spiral" all credit goes to 4 Leaf Studios.

Editors note: The sign language used in the alpha is a much more realistic variant then the one of the final game. It is realistic, if Shizune seems blunt and uncaring, its because thats how sign is shown in the real world.

Mishas POV:

I have always been really happy when the people around me are happy, too.

Because of that, lately I think more and more about what my life will be like when I leave yamaku.

It was really lucky for me to be able to get into this school, and even luckier that i could meet Shicchan, if it wasnt for that, then I dont know if i would be here now.

I am who I am so, I wouldnt, probably.

In just a few months, me, Shicchan, and Hicchan will all go our separate ways. its like how a lot of flowers bloom on the same tree, but then when they fall, they never fall together, do they?

Im right~! haha..

I only had a few friends in grade school, and in middle school, too. I remember them for a long time after we stopped going to school together, but then they stopped talking to me. Their loves moved on, and I forgot them.

Shicchan... Is Shicchan going to forget me when she leaves this school?

Will I have to forget Shicchan?

I cant do that. Never. But, I know it will happen.

Hicchan said that just because we wont be going to school together, that dosent mean that friendships have to end. If you fight hard enough for it, you can hold onto a friendship.

I have to work so hard for it, though, then its pointless. Of course ill give it my 100%! But it dosent mean anything if Shicchan were to move on and stop being my friend. If she would try, then i dont think I could.

After all, then I would just be in Shicchans way~

If that happens, I dont know if i could go on.

Its likely that will be what happens.

I only have ever loved Shicchan, even from the first day we met.

Shicchan once told me that she dosent like Yamaku because its where parents send the kids they are ashamed of.

Its true, Shicchan. I'm one of those children nobody wants. i have always been bullied, because im differnt. Isnt that something I cant chance? Im really sorry. The things that are wrong with me, I cant change.

Not enough was wrong with me that I could get into Yamaku, so I had to make up a lie, that I wanted to be a sign language teacher. I dont like to lie, but the person i am not is a big liar, so...

Shicchan, I wanted to talk to you, so I learned sign language, even though I wasnt very good at it, and im forgetful.

You told me that a human being dosent need a meaning, or a purpose, or respect; those can be gained if you work hard enough.

Ill really become one; a sign language teacher. If im something, ill be a real person to you, right, shicchan?

The only person I have really had is Shicchan.

Shicchan I really, really, love you.

I wish I could interpret for you forever.

I know its unrealistic, though. You would hate me eventually, because I wouldnt be a person moving forward in life.

If Shicchan were to hate me, I would probably die.

Haha~. If Shicchan and i keep going, then we'll drift apart. But the same thing might happen if we stay together.

I guess I'm just not the right person for you, Shicchan.

So~...Ive been thinking about "That" for a long time...

Maybe its better if I didnt exist.

...

I talked with Hicchan the other day. Its hard for me to understand Hicchan, but he seems like a good person. I feel a lot better nor, because i was able to tell someone how i feel.

The things I want to tell Shicchan would be silly to her, and I dont know if i could sign all of that to her. And~! Shicchan has her own life.

Shicchan and Hicchan are a real couple now. I'm so glad. I was able to see them both fall in love.

Even if it's me, I'm still really glad.

Am...I really glad?

Im really, really glad. I really am.

I really am...

Hahaha~...

Hm~ Hm~..Its time for a shower. I like the feeling of warm water against my skin. Ill feel refreshed.

Haha...

Yay~! Im dont, and my hair is almost totally dried. The person who told me that I look cuter with my hair like this was Shicchan. I dont even really remember what I looked like with my hair straight!

I try the doorknob, because she always leaves her room unlocked when she is inside.

Its open.

Shicchan is sitting at her desk reading a book. She sees me and waves hi!

[Morning Shicchan!]

[Good morning, Misha]

I laugh and plop down on her bed, Its soft, she has diffent sheets than I do.

[How are you, Shicchan?]

[Im doing well, Its very early for you to be up. Is there something differnt about today?]

[Yup~! Well, no. Well, yes and no, Shicchan. I talked with Hicchan, and he told me to tell you that he dosent resent you at all! (reference to earlier in the act, ignore it.)]

[Really?]

[Yup! I dont know what you two were talking about, but he said that it dosent matter if the student council has so much work, or that he has to put up with so much work because of you! He said if it wasnt for you, his life wouldnt be the same. Hicchan really likes you, shicchan~!]

Shicchan dosent say anything, she just thinks.

[Shicchan, did you tell Hicchan that you didnt know if I might hate you for that?]

[Yes, I did.]

[Well, you dont have to worry about that, Shicchan~! I dont resent you at all, either. I feel the same way!]

Shicchan gets up from her desk and walks over to me.

[Thank you. Im happy that you think that way.]

Im really happy, too~...

[Really, Shicchan? Okay~! Lets go out somewhere then~!]

[What do you mean?]

[Shicchan! Its no good for a young girl to stay inside all the time. And~! We havent gone out together in a long time. Soon, Shicchan is going to be going on more and more dates with Hicchan, so we have to hang out together now~!]

Please bear with my selfishness, Shicchan. She smiles and starts putting on her jacket.

[Okay. Where should we go?]

[Hm...Anywhere]

[You should decide. Im thankful to you, so I want to it to be someplay you want to go.]

Anywhere is fine though. Where we go dosent matter to me, Shicchan.

Me and Shicchan havent really gone out together by ourselves in a long time, So im really happy.

We eat lunch, getting what we each want from two differnt restaurants. im not as active as Shicchan, so I cant eat all the things she eats.

Then we go shopping, its her idea, because she thingks i could use more clothes. Okay~! Ill pick out some cute clothes for Shicchan too!

The two of us go to one store, because they have nice skirts, but Shicchan wants to go to another store because they sell things at a better price, so we go there and start shopping.

I already bought a lot.

I even have a new blouse now. Its cute, but i dont know if the color will go with my hair.

[Im going to blame you for that, With you hair color, Misha, Its hard to find anything that goes well with you]

[Hahaha~! Sorry, Shicchan. Hm~...Hey~! Shicchan, this time its my turn. ill pick out something that will look cute on you!]

She blushes. Shicchan is a little but of a tomboy, so she dosent like dressing up in clothes that are too feminine, but I want to see her like that.

[Aw~... Come on, Shicchan? Just for today?]

[Fine.]

[Thats great! Im really glad~!]

[Wahahaha~!]

I see a jacket that would look great on Shicchans body. Her figure is nice, like a model.

[How about this, Shicchan?]

After a while, Shicchan gets annoyed because I keep making her put on new things.

[Stop! Stop!]

[Wahaha! What is it, Shicchan?]

[Im beginning to think you are just playing with me.]

[Yup! But i like teasing Shicchan a little now and then~.]

I want to hug her. Okay~! Ill do it.

As soon as my arms are around her, Shicchan freezes and gets very stiff. i let go of her.

Ah, thats right, Shicchan. You like it when people touch you. I guess youre unfamiliar with it, Right? Right...

So ill never be able to hold Shicchan. Its okay if you dont hold me back, as as I can feel Shicchan warmth. At least, thats what ive been telling myself all this time.

Shicchan, even if i cant touch you, ill still love you.

Right?

["Shiccha-"]

Haha~. My voice cracked. Am I sad?

Shicchan face is so concerned. Please stop looking at me like that, Shicchan.

Please...Dont.

I hold my stomach and pretend to groan.

[Haha! Shicchan, Im going to go somewhere else, just for a little bit, okay? okay~!]

[Im just a little sick, dont worry about it~! Dont worry about it, okay, Shicchan? Okay~!]

[Ill be right back, Shicchan~!]

Haha~.

I lied to Shicchan again.

That look on your face hurts me.

Maybe it would be better if Shicchan didnt care about me. But that is what I want.

Shicchan, do you like me?

If you do, why did you reject me feelings?

I want to hit myself. Thats wrong. its not like that...Thinking like that is

really

really...

Stupid Misha~...

Shicchan, we're really too different.

Maybe it would be better if you were to just forget about me.

Ill...Start to resent Shicchan someday

We're leaving the store now. We really were there for a long time.

I spent a little too much of my own money, but it's okay.

Today was…

I'm following behind Shicchan, like always. She turns back to look at me over her shoulder. Are you checking to see if I'm following you, Shicchan? Well, of course.

But…

Shicchan, do you look over your shoulder because you're really the one looking out for me?

…I guess.

I'm sad.

No matter what I do, I'll never be the right person for Shicchan.

Shicchan and me are separated by too many things. The me that I am now will never be able to change any of them.

I don't think I ever will be able to.

It really makes me sad.

To my right, I hear a loud noise, like a car horn. It's a bad noise. When you hear something like that… it's not something that you are supposed to hear. It means something is wrong.

I wonder where that car is going. Is it going to hit me?

I turn in the direction of it.

This must be fate, right? After all, I have lived so long, and I never know what to do next. It can all be over if I just… don't move.

Haha~…

Shicchan is growing smaller in front of me. See, Shicchan? Even without me, you will always be okay. Not like me without Shicchan.

Maybe it's because of that, that's why Shicchan has always seemed so tall compared to me.

It's because we're really, really different.

Shicchan is always so serious.

She always thinks about everything so deeply. I want her to smile more, because her smile is so cute. When Shicchan smiles, I feel the same way.

So, I thought, Maybe I can be Shicchan's umbrella. I'll be whatever Shicchan needs me to be. I'll make Shicchan smile. Then, I'll be happy, too.

I always walk behind you, Shicchan, so I can catch you if you fall, and look out for you.

But I wonder if you ever needed that from me.

It looks like this is where it ends, though.

*Crash*

I don't really want to move.

I don't know if I can move.

I can see Shicchan still walking ahead of me.

Shicchan, with your back to me, I guess it's like I don't really exist. I can see you walking away. But~… That's really obvious, isn't it? Because Shicchan's life will always be moving forward.

When I wake up again, everything hurts. Shicchan is sitting over me. She looks really tall, but Shicchan has always looked like that to me.

I feel stupid.

Everything I do is the wrong thing, always. Even this time.

Even going out today was my idea. If it wasn't for me, Shicchan wouldn't be here right now.

Shicchan is crying. I can't feel my arms. My chest, it really hurts. Everything hurts. I wonder what I look like right now. Am I still small, compared to Shicchan? The way I look right now, I probably look smaller than even before.

I'm sorry, Shicchan. I can't grow as a person like you. If I could, then maybe everything would be different. I won't even be able to change from this, will I? If this was Shicchan, wouldn't you just try harder?

I wish I could hug Shicchan. Shicchan, we have been together for a long time, right? Right. I never even hugged Shicchan. Or held her hand slowly. I want to do all those things. Just once, at least…

I…

Shicchan told me once that human beings can do anything. Human beings have infinite potential, right, Shicchan?

If you want, if you really believe, and if you work hard, you can do anything. Isn't that what you said? I want to believe that. Now I remember. That time, you did hold my hand. That time, Shicchan was able to be my umbrella.

So, maybe…

If I really believe, and try, and have hope…

I don't know what I want to do, but at least for now…

Please work! Please!

I dont want to die!

…No, it's not going to work. I'm not like Shicchan.

I don't know if I can even move. My ears are ringing. If I tried to talk, what would happen?

I'm scared.

I have to do something…

Ah, I know~. I'll try to look happy for Shicchan like always.

Shicchan, I wanted to be like your Yamato Nadeshiko. I want to to be by your side forever. Isn't that what it means? To always help the person that you love, and to always be with them?

Is it silly?

…

See? I'm smiling. So please cheer up, Shicchan.

…

I'm really stupid.

...

HISAOS POV

I found out what happened through an email from Shizune on my cell phone. I didn't even notice it until almost 5 PM.

It's a bad habit I have, that I frequently forget to check or charge my phone, sometimes for days at a time.

So I didn't find out about the accident until almost six hours after it happened.

By the time I got to the hospital, it was too late.

I'm a pretty lousy friend.

Afterwards, I was asked to answer some questions about Misha to the police. They were going to rule it as a suicide.

But that can't be right. The last day that I saw her, she looked so happy.

Unless that, too, was a lie.

I still refused to believe it. I told them that I refused to believe it. It's not denial, really. It's just that it I'm so sure they were wrong.

Despite…

Misha, I was able to defend you at least this once. I hope I did a good job.

I'm sorry.

There was a surprisingly small number of people at the funeral.

In the days after, I was able to rationalize it. Bit by bit. I had to.

It's the summer, after all. And Misha was pretty sociable, but she really didn't hang out with a lot of people. I think really only Shizune, myself, and Yuuko knew her all that well.

Even so, it's depressing.