Uuuuugggh what the hell happened with this movie? I mean, wow, what a mess.



Ok, let’s wind it back.

To start off with, the cast.

You guys (and girl) are fine. I honestly didn’t have a problem with any of you in this film, but an actor’s performance can only be as good as the material he or she is provided with, and man was that material awful. This whole film just felt like two vastly different jigsaw puzzles that someone has tried desperately to force together.

I can only imagine that during production 2 different scripts were created for this film, and on the way to get them photocopied, the intern dropped them both on the ground and a big gust of wind blew half of each away, so he just gathered up the remaining sheets, bundled them together in no particular order, hoping no one would notice.

Superhero origin films all have that task of trying to quickly get to the point where the main characters get their powers or whatever, and usually I can forgive some heavy-handed exposition or foreshadowing, just not in this case. The movie tries so hard to get to the powers early, then just stops, and nothing happens.

It feels like half this movie is just spent with them doing absolutely nothing.

There are a couple of redeeming moment of this film, one of them being explanation on how the characters develop vastly different super powers from the same event, it made a touch more sense than just a random space cloud.

However so much of this film feels empty, there is little to no chemistry between the main four characters,

the obviously “bad” government guy is just the worst (stop chewing gum in every scene mate, we get it, you’re a dick), and jesus, Doctor Doom looks just awful.

The original description from fans as “a man covered in melted garbage bags” is just spot on.

What frightens me the most is that this is the “mended” version of the film, as the Josh Trank (now formally known as Josh Tank) original cut was deemed by Fox as “lacking clear direction” and not making sense.

Writer Simon Kinberg ( X-Men : Days of Future Past) was brought into the project after Fox came to the conclusion that director Josh Trank was off his rocker (if you wish to read more about the rumours surrounding the director and production of this movie, click here).

I feel a little sorry for Kinberg, he was given an impossible task of trying to salvage this film from whatever state Trank had left it in, and as a result his name is now tacked onto the worst adaptation of the Fantastic 4 to date. That’s right, I said it. 2015 Fantastic 4 is worse than the Tim Story incarnation in 2005.

You honestly had one job Trank, one bloody job and you botched it.



The best thing that came out of this colossal balls-up is that Disney have kicked Josh Trank out of the director’s seat for an upcoming Star Wars film.

I can’t recommend that anyone pays money to see this film.

Comic book movie fans will see it regardless of the reviews, but if you’re tossing up between this and something else, see the “something else” because there is a 91% chance it’ll be much better than Fantastic 4.

Rating : Josh Tank / 10

UPDATE

Today Josh Trank claimed in a tweet that the studio (Fox) was responsible for ruining his version

of Fantastic 4.

(The tweet was deleted soon after)