If you ever have trouble sleeping at night, you can always try the tried and true method of closing your eyes and counting Jenelle Evans’ children. Just picture them hopping over a fence, carefree and safe from the terrifying circumstances at the home of Jenelle and her (alleged) dog murdering, weapons stockpiling, confederate flag loving husband David Eason. Radar reports that a “North Carolina judge ordered all of the children in Jenelle and David’s home be removed from their custody”. Nugget’s ghost (Nugget was the family pet whom David alledgedly beat and shot to death) can finally rest easy knowing all the kiddos are safe. For the time being. And according to People, Jenelle would also like a break because she’s “SO sick of this drama. Everyone wants a piece of my life … like why tho?”. Oh, c’mon Jenelle. No guess at all?

Earlier this week, CPS removed two of Jenelle’s children, 9-year-old son Jace, and 4-year-old son Kaiser, from her care. In case you lost count before you drifted off to sleep, Jenelle has 3 children with three different fathers. The child she shares with David is 2-year-old Ensley. David also has a daughter from a previous marriage named Maryssa. Radar says this most recent removal order names both Ensley and Maryssa.

According to People, Jenelle’s mom has had primary custody of Jace since 2017. Janelle has visitation rights, but those were suspended in the first CPS ruling. At that time Kaiser was removed from Janelle’s home and is living with his father and grandmother. Jenelle was, astoundingly, surprised.

“Kaiser was taken away Friday without my consent, before Mother’s Day, and I have been in touch with my lawyer pertaining this matter,” Evans told Us Weekly on Monday. She alleged that “Kaiser was taken from his daycare by his grandmother [Nathan Griffith’s mother, Doris] with no notice or call to me,” and claimed that “CPS told Doris to take Kaiser without my consent and still have no legal paperwork signed by the judge stating my kids are taken from me.”

Jenelle lamented further that she “only had Ensley with me for Mother’s Day this year”. Boo fucking hoo. TMZ now says that a family source has told them that Ensley is “out of the house“, per the judge’s decision.

These poor kids. Hopefully one day, all eleventy million of them will join in on a class action lawsuit against MTV for enabling this shit in the first place.

Pic: Instagram