Jacob J. Lew, President Obama’s reported pick for Treasury secretary, has a ridiculous signature, as the blogosphere learned from a widely circulated White House memo he signed in 2011.

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Mr. Lew is currently White House chief of staff and previously served as the director of the Office of Management and Budget. If he is confirmed as Treasury secretary, that ringleted, roller-coastering, Slinky-like signature could soon shine from newly printed dollar bills nationwide.

Bloggers are taking note, with New York magazine’s Kevin Roose likening the autograph to “one of those Crazy Straws you get at Six Flags” and “a slip of paper in Office Max that people use to try out new pens.” In 2011 The Daily Mail even consulted a forensic handwriting analyst, Sheila Lowe, who looked deep into Mr. Lew’s calligraphic soul and determined:

‘He doesn’t want us to see a lot about him.



‘The soft roundedness of the letters show he can adapt quickly and make rapid changes, but he’s also self-protective. He doesn’t want people to see his private side.’

Before he goes up for Senate confirmation, lawmakers must know: Would Mr. Lew clean up his penmanship for the greenback, as current Treasury Secretary Timothy F. Geithner did?

He seems to have a couple versions of his John Hancock, for what it’s worth. I pulled some other White House memos that bear his curlicues:

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Amazingly, while this looks like an arbitrary series of loop-the-loops, he’s actually mostly consistent about having seven full loops each time. Maybe they stand for the seven letters of “Jack Lew” (as he is known); maybe seven is his lucky number. Clearly we need to consult another graphologist.

And then there is this alternate version, which is more swirly than curly (those are technical terms). They could very well be initials rather than a full signature — but since both versions are illegible, it’s honestly hard to say.

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