My favorite Google feature is Google Dictionary. Whenever I need a word defined, I just type it into the search box and the meaning pops right up. It’s really convenient, but sometimes the definitions can be strange. For example, here are some words I looked up recently on Google Dictionary.

Yahoo: A stupid Web site for stupid people who only want crap.

Ask: A crap site for idiots.

Bing: Just a bunch of crap.

Monopoly: A term that idiots like to throw around to sound smart at parties, but really they don’t know what the hell they’re talking about.

Information: A thing that Google makes instantly accessible to anyone for free. And that makes them the enemy? Explain that logic to me.

Charity: A thing that Google gives to.

Environment: A thing that Google gives to.

Barack Obama: A cool guy who uses Google.

Lady Gaga: A cool lady who uses Google.

Privacy: An overrated thing that people should maybe chill out about.

Relax: A thing that some people should learn how to do, especially journalists.

Victim: A nice company that gets attacked all the time for no reason.

Jesus Christ: A guy who made people’s lives much easier and then was crucified. Sound familiar?

Books: Something people can read online for free now.

Thank You: A thing it wouldn’t kill people to say.

Computer: A thing for using Google. ♦