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Superheroes lead strange lives. Every single one of them has been shrink-rayed, transformed into an ape, or had their mind transferred to a different body. Usually this just means an awkward fight to switch things back to normal. Well, when Spider-Man and Doctor Octopus switch bodies, it lasts for more than a year. It's the second-worst thing he's ever done to Spider-Man.

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While trapped in Doctor Octopus' melty, dying body, Peter has access to all the doctor's memories. Most of these consist of getting punched as a child by Octavius' father or getting punched as an adult by himself, but one memory really gets to Peter: watching himself have sex with his own Aunt. Because there is nothing comic writers hate more than Peter Parker. When Batman changes bodies with someone, the writers think, "Look out, crime! Batman's in a body that can shoot eye lasers!" When Spider-Man changes bodies with someone, the writers think, "YOU KNOW, THIS BRAIN HE'S IN WOULD CONTAIN FULL PENETRATION MEMORIES OF HIS AUNT."

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In the memory, Aunt May is wearing her wedding dress, which means not only that Doc Ock saw her in the dress before the ceremony -- bad luck -- but also that their first time together was pushing her incontinence briefs to the side and reverse-cowgirling in front of a wedding coordinator. Search your feelings. You know there's no other way to squeeze in wedding gown sex after hair and makeup but before the ceremony. This is exactly the type of thought that likely occurs to poor Peter as he listens to his worst enemy's voice shout from his own mouth, "My dear lady, reduce your velocity or my accursed loins shall buuuuurrrrrsT!"