3 /10

"Armageddon" is a Michael Bay spectacle....which is why I never had any desire to see the thing. But a friend of mine, Angelo, begged me to see it...saying he thought I'd like it. So, as a favor to him, I saw this on DVD tonight. And, as expected, it was huge...with amazing CGI and stunts....and writing which was done by a couple really talented 6 year-olds. Yes...the writing is THAT bad. And, because of that, it falls into the category of a film you watch and enjoy AFTER you turn off your brain.



A giant killer meteor is headed to Earth and will wipe out all life on the planet. So, the US government has a plan...to send a bunch of total misfit oil drillers to drill and then detonate nuclear devices to explode the meteor and thus render it harmless. All the rest of the film is filler leading up to this foregone conclusion.



To say that the film is ridiculous scientifically is a massive understatement. I could go on and on and on about these aspects of the film. But you can still make or enjoy a film that makes no sense IF the writing is good and the filmmakers are able to make it seem realistic. This didn't happen in this film...mostly because the writing was atrocious. These 'astronauts' are the biggest group of quirky misfits you could imagine...and this totally took me out of the plot. Had they found professional acting folks who were like real human beings and not ridiculous caricatures, then it might have worked....but the whole lot of them were just dumb....terribly written and dumb. I cannot believe that Disney spent THIS MUCH money to make a film but only spent about .00000004% of the budget on writing!!



The fact this film won four Oscars doesn't bother me. These were all technical Oscars and the film LOOKS impressive....and I am sure a ton of the huge budget went for this. But what bothers me is that the movie made a ton of money...showing that if you market a film hard enough (and the studio spent more to advertise this than the cost of many films) folks will flock to it like lemmings.



Overall, worth seeing for the action sequences....if you can wade through the bad writing that goes along with it. But as one of the cast says in the film, "Oh god, does it suck up here!".



Oh, and Angelo also recommended "The Bucket List", which I saw just before "Armageddon"....and he's one for two, as "The Bucket List" was amazing! So, he's not always wrong!!!