It’s been almost a full week since the Charlottesville riots, and the dismantling of our nation’s confederate symbols shows no sign of stopping.

More statues removed, more calls for Trump’s impeachment, and more tears have flown. It’s the same story on a different day. Let’s stop this madness once and for all – and to do that, we first must recognize the problem.

As Lara Witt’s editorial piece from yesterday’s Harper’s Bazaar states in part:

There is nothing more American than unfiltered white rage and white supremacy…it doesn’t surprise me when white Americans display simplistic and superficial ideas of what they think will end public displays of bigotry or inept leadership. White Americans have a tendency to whitewash and deliberately downplay the reality and gravity of their past and present sins.

1.) We’ve got the statues down, now let’s remove the books.

America is filled with books that reference the Confederacy, racism, and slavery. Start with the Bible, which contains literally hundreds of references to slavery. It even goes so far as to say it would be foolish to free slaves or to let them “rule over princes” (Proverbs, 19:10). No way. Gotta go. Sorry nuns, hand over the Good Book.

2.) Cancel all classes on race and American history.

How have we not already done this? I’m offended just thinking about it. I took all sorts of classes in college about the civil war, American western expansion, racial divides, and the civil rights movement. All those classes referenced violence, colonialism, Japanese internment during WWII, and – yeah – slavery. It was really ugly stuff. We can’t continue to teach our kids about this hideous stain on history. What if they repeat it? Fire all history teachers and just gloss over those last 2+ centuries of American history. Our kids are too sensitive for that stuff.

3.) Deface all graves of civil war soldiers.

What if you’re walking through a cemetery and you see a civil war soldier’s grave? Do you know how offensive that might be to somebody? That person actually died fighting about race. It doesn’t matter what side they were on. Any reminders of the civil war should be defaced and disposed of. We as Americans cannot live with the daily reminder that 500,000 fellow Americans actually died fighting about slavery. How disgusting.

4.) Deport anybody with southern heritage.

This one’s really a no-brainer. Racism has grown so rampant that we can’t afford to let it get any more popular. We simply cannot have our citizens sharing the streets with anyone who might actually have Confederate blood running through their system. They’re like a stain on society. Let’s round them up and send them far, far away. That’s a tradition we just can’t afford to take any chances on having it return.

5.) Rewrite all references to American heroes as marginalized groups.

I am personally disgusted that basically all the portraits in the Oval Office are privileged white males. We need to commission a new painter ASAP to change their race and gender. Who said George Washington defined himself as male? Maybe Andrew Jackson should be portrayed as Native American. The new movie due out this November about LBJ should certainly have a Muslim lead. It’s only fair.

And remember, above all else, liberal white people are the only ones who are going to save this country. Just ask Ms. Witt:

This has always been you. It has always been on white people to end systems of oppression that their ancestors either started or were complicit in at one point or another. We need white liberals to confront how white supremacy protects them, how they have a privilege which allows them to see blatant racism.

So get out there! Burn your books, dismantle the statues, rewrite history. It’s the only way to prevent making these same mistakes again.

And don’t forget to vote Democrat.