I may not have screenshots for a bit, because I started taking screenshots a little further into the game.

WHERE THE *BLEEP* DID YOUR HEAD GO?!?!!

A tall, blond and confident man with a varmint rifle on his back walks into the saloon. He has shades and a black cowboy hat, with light metal armor protecting his body, and a laser pistol on one side of his belt, with a 10mm pistol on the other. Just to avoid confusion, I’m that dude… so yeah…

A dude who looks like a complete fudgebag is yelling at my dear friend Trudy here about how his gang owns the Cool-Aid section of Walmart or something, I really don’t remember. There’s only one way to solve this.

I pull the varmint rifle off my back, open V.A.T.S, and click a bunch of times on his head. I slow-mo stick the rifle in his ear and quickly make sure he has no more problems ever again. I then yell “WHERE THE *BLOOP* DID YOUR HEAD GO?!?!?”, in real life, ’cause swag. I’m also a very nutty person, but that’s ’cause I’m a hardcore gamer. Gattah go faaast.

For whatever reason, some people start hating me and I get a level up. I didn’t know getting people to hate you gave you so much experience! Oh wait, no wonder I’m such a baws, I always get called shotgun noob in TF2… that means a job well done.

I reload the save to right before I Quentin Torentino’d his face, and instead talk to to Trudy. She says “Yes, Hondo [my character is indeed named that again, you may know that from my Pokemon journals, and if you’re really cool, you’ll know what that is actually from. Also, I have a bad history of just abruptly stopping journals. Whoops], this guy is a complete fudgebag, and you should go into V.A.T.S and blow his face all over the window, but you should talk to the crack-dealing locals first to see if they can help you”

I follow the antagonistic bro outside into the night air of the town of Goodsprings, and chase him as he runs away down into the town, then casually leans against the wall of a house. I talk to him, and it gives a dialogue option to help him take over the town, I click that option, or try to, but then I purposely on accident narrowly miss and scroll down and click “goodbye”. I ain’t gonna help dat guy, he’s a nutterbutter. Then, I follow quest markers around and talk to the locals.

I talk to the locals, and everyone but the annoying wannabe Mr. Krabs general store manager agrees to help. I really doubt that you’ll be excited if I describe that in detail.

THE GOOD, THE BAD, AND THE DUDE USING DYNAMITE IN V.A.T.S.

I’m going to explain the actual story of the quest, at least according to my memory, because this happened like five days ago.

These dudes called the Powder Gangers, who are escaped convicts from the nearby town of Primm, want at this guy who is a friend of the town people, and they believe that the town should tell them where he is or something because they believe that they own the area just because they are the most aimhacked faction in the area. So, you’re given the options to either help the town of Goodsprings, or to help the Powder Nooblets. The side you help will of course like you more, and the side you don’t will like you more in a different way, i.e. like to kill you.

One of the locals I talked to gave me a bunch of dynamite. I can’t wait to try this out.

Two groups of people approach each other on the highway. It is a cool, summer night, because it is always summer in a nuclear desert. One group fights for the forces of good, the other, for the forces of Miracle Whip, i.e. evil.

As the two forces meet, one dude pulls out a pistol and shoots at the other people, and everybody else joins in. A Dynamite lands at his feet, and him and his two other companions get blown up into the air and off the road.

I had thrown the first dynamite manually, to see what happens. Apparently, I had a lighter on me that I didn’t know about, or dynamite comes with free lighters or something, ’cause I lit the dynamite with the cigarette lighter and threw it right into the middle of their group.

I think it’s time to break up this boyband, so I open V.A.T.S., and watch as one, and then two dynamite land right next to the remaining Powder Gangers who are hiding against the incline at the edge of the highway. Looks like this boyband is going only One Direction… TO HELL! (LOLOLOL funnies you may ROFL now)

The dude who was yelling at the bar is still alive, so I run over to him, open V.A.T.S., and quickly make sure that I have no problems with dynamite supplies ever again. WHERE THE *BLOOP* DID YOUR HEAD GO BIOTCH?!?!?!

After that, I get a discount at the saloon and the guy who was hiding thanked me and gave me bottlecaps (the main currency of the game, for people unfamiliar with Fallout. He also told me that he’s like head of the Crimson Caravan or something, or works with them, I have no idea, but anyways he said I should come see him sometime and V.A.T.S. dynamite all his friends and whatnot.

And then I decide it’s time to start exploring and travelling the wasteland, shooting stuff in the head as I go.

HERE IS THE NEXT PART

Thanks for reading, and shoutout to DuckOnDuck, ’cause $wag. And shoutout to TheGirl for the like, also due to heavy $wag conditions. Be sure to like and follow, as there may be large droplets of $wag this afternoon.