As alert readers will recall, this week we commissioned Panelbase to poll the good people of England, and we got some answers that we think will blow your minds. But we’re going to start with one we suspect people will find sad, but all too predictable.

Many will remember bitterly the short-lived “lovebombing” campaign from the indyref, in which a list of semi-celebrities from the rest of the UK was assembled to assure Scots of how much they were valued and cherished by their UK partners.

Four years on, not so much.

Because overall, the voters of England – that’s Remainers and Leavers combined – would drop Scotland like a hot potato if it were somehow to be necessary in order to secure Brexit. (And remember, very nearly half of them don’t even WANT Brexit. How much must those guys hate us?) Just a third of English voters don’t think it’d be worth ditching Scotland to get out of the EU.

If you exclude don’t-know responses, those numbers come out, ironically, to 55-45.

Still, at least it’s not just us.

Because by an even bigger margin (59-41), the people of England are also willing – on those numbers one might go so far as to say “eager” – to dump Northern Ireland if it gets them out of the European Union.

We didn’t ask about Wales because Wales voted Leave. But we did ask one more.

The only thing that our English cousins were almost reluctant (51-49 excluding DKs) to sacrifice was the part of the UK that’s actually just a tiny rocky outcrop of someone else’s country and has roughly the same population as Dumfries or Irvine or Falkirk. (To be honest we’re kicking ourselves for not asking about the Falkland Islands now.)

The people of England would, by a comfortable distance, rather hang on to the 34,000 citizens (plus some apes) of Gibraltar than the 7.2 million of Scotland and Northern Ireland, but they’d still quite happily surrender all three just to reduce the number of immigrants coming to the UK and trash the economy.

All we’d say is, we don’t envy the person who has to make the video next time.