I know I make a lot of vegan food but being a vegan is sort of similar to how I’m an octopus: I am not one. And while no one has ever called me a preachy octopus (not a sermon, just an 8-tentacled-could-destroy-you thought), I’ve gotten “preachy vegan” more than once. So you know what I say to that?

Breakfast piñatas.

(click to jump to the recipe)

And you know what I say to that blank look you’re giving me?

Sunny Side Up Spinach Cakes. Now stop looking at me. Your soulless eyes make me nervous.

Ok. Sure. It helps that I eat my breakfast with a baseball bat and blind, reckless enthusiasm. I guess. But these can be your breakfast piñatas too. The similarities are uncanny! I will explain! Where’s my baseball bat?!!

Just like a paper mache unicorn dangling from a tree keeps candy and the occasional gold watch in its belly, these spinach and cheese cakes create a magically low-carb non-bread vehicle to cradle a delicious prize. See? Exactly the same!

Not convinced? Well how about this! Beating the crap out of a piñata makes me feel good because I have deep-rooted emotional problems I’m filled with hate I like breaking things and having better things come out of that thing just like cutting into a Sunny Side Up Spinach Cake makes me feel good because egg yolks are rich and delicious and I love unleashing them onto my plate. Eerily similar.

So there you have it. The Sunny Side Up Spinach Cake is a tasty breakfast option if you love sunny side up eggs but don’t love soaking them up with empty carbs. Low in calories, high in protein, and paired with 1g or less net-carbs, this breakfast piñata lets you have your sunny side up egg and soak up the yolk too.

Now get crackin!

(I hate me.)

SUNNY SIDE UP SPINACH CAKES

makes 4-6 muffins, depending on cheese choice and muffin silicone cup size

nutrition info

Ingredients:

81g chopped frozen spinach, cooked according to package instructions

6g milled chia seeds

.5 oz crumbled feta cheese – or – one wedge of Laughing Cow Cheese

salt and pepper to taste + any other things you’re craving > paprika, red pepper flakes, cayenne, bragg’s seasoning, love. (not weird.)

4-6 whole eggs, depending on how many muffin cups you fill.

optional add-in ideas: capers, finely diced tomatoes, more cheese, diced onions, minced garlic

*Tools that help immensely: individual silicone muffin cups

Directions:

Preheat your oven to 400 degrees.

Mix the spinach, milled chia seeds, seasonings, and whichever cheese you’re using. If you’re using a silicone muffin cup the size of the ones from Ikea, press about 40-45g of the mixture along the interior of the cup to make a thin wall of spinach. If you’re using a more standard sized silicone muffin cup, use 20-25g of the spinach mixture to make your spinach fortress. Crack and egg into your spinach cup. Top with some more cheese if you’re feeling that. Set the silicone muffin cups into some baking dish of sorts and pop them in the oven. Bake for 14 or so minutes or until the whites of the eggs are just cooked.

Remove and eat promptly for the best gooey prizes.