I fell exactly 5 months ago today. Easily the worst day of my life. Today I walked out of my Neurosurgeon’s office and I never have to go back. No more Xrays, no more appointments, no workout restrictions for the gym, pole, anything. I’m free. And it’s an amazing feeling.

I haven’t posted much the last oh…um…hm..for a while. I went in on February 29th for my 12 week check up and the Doc allowed me to go without the brace from that point on. March was a really difficult. The first week without the brace was so difficult. I almost felt stupid for thinking that I was ready to be without it. But slowly I got stronger, and when I least expected it, there was a breakthrough.

I really took the last two months to basically just process everything that had happened and what was going on. I had shared so much with everyone the first 8 weeks, and I just needed, and wanted, some privacy with the more difficult and challenging weeks that I was having. Also every time I sat down to type something out, nothing would happen. So instead I really zoned in and focused on my recovery and everything I could do to help make myself get better. I don’t think I’ve ever been so dedicated to anything in my life.

I remember laying in my hospital bed after they made me move and walk the first time after my surgery, I had gotten sick from it (which is a common thing I guess and apparently shows your point of tolerance or something like that). Anyway this nurse, who happened to be a high school classmate of mine, held my hand as I cried my eyes out, and she said “You can do this Lindsey. I know it seems like it’s so far away, but one day you’ll look back on this and it will be over. It’ll be nothing but a memory.” She consoled me and stayed with me till I calmed down, but walked out of the room barely holding herself together. Now that day is here and all I want to do is go and give her a big ass hug and thank her, and tell her how those words have been with me every single day. They have driven me to keep pushing through even on my hardest, darkest days.

Find something, anything, that can drive you and push you and keep you from giving up. Hang onto it tight with both hands. It doesn’t even have to be something big. For me it was those four small words. “You can do this”. 12 letters. That’s it. And I believe that all of you can do whatever it is that you dream of doing.

Moving forward, I’m a little scared to be honest. I did get a referral from my Dr. for a Physical Therapist that deals specifically with athletes. Because I don’t technically need physical therapy I’m only going to be going a few weeks. It was my own personal choice as I want to do everything I can to take care of myself in this recovery. I’m looking forward to what I’ll be learning there, and I’m hoping I can share some of those things on here!

I still want to keep writing because it is something I just love to do. And there will be a lot of changes happening in my life this year. I really want to start sharing some of my favorite recipes, exercises, stretches, ideas, projects, and so much more with everyone so I can hopefully help improve others lives the way others have improved mine. That’s what I want. I just want to help. 🙂

I want to close this post by just saying that you all helped change my life for the better. I know I’ve said it multiple times before, but in all seriousness, there isn’t a doubt in my mind that every single person who has commented, visited, messaged, texted, showed kindness and support, helped me recover that much faster. When I was having some of the worst days complete strangers would pull me back from the edge. I wish the entire world could experience the love that I had the joy of experiencing over the last 5 months. Because it’s wonderful. You guys made me feel like I was a magical unicorn ninja that shit glitter and could do anything. If we all treated everyone this way everyday, I can’t even imagine what the world would become. You guys have enriched my life and pushed me to be a better human being. And no amount of words will ever repay you all for that.

-With ALL my love and gratitude,

LindseyGrace Riddell