Virgil heard a knock on his door and found out the source of it was his friend, Logan, and an unknown man in a suit right next to him. He felt confused when he saw them both.

"Virgil, I would like you to meet my lawyer, Ernest Geraci," Logan introduced.

Geraci extended his hand to the confused man and he shook the lawyer's hand awkwardly.

"Um, what brings you two here?" Virgil asked.

"We have a documented contract and a copy for each of us. All we need is your signature," Logan explained.

After taking everything in and letting the two inside, Virgil was shocked as he remembered the cause of this contract. He was hit by his new boyfriend, Remus, and rambled to Logan about it. Logan suggested Virgil end the relationship before things get out of hand, but Virgil claimed that Remus only hit him once and wouldn't do it again. After battering Virgil with a lot of statistics, Virgil claimed that he would end the relationship if he was hit three times only to calm Logan down. Logan retorted by saying written proof would be needed for him to be convinced and Virgil complied, thinking the teacher was joking.

"Heh heh, I thought you were joking," Virgil admitted nervously.

"Toxic relationships are nothing to joke about, Virgil. If you weren't so stubborn, we wouldn't even have arrangement. Plus, since I know how you get with 'dry text' like our old high school textbooks, I'm going to give you the synopsis: basically, you're going to stay with Remus for as long as you wish, but the amount of times he hits you in the relationship will be tallied by you and me. You've already been hit by him once, so you're leaving after two more times. You are not to tell him about the contract or have him see your copy since he could potentially use mental and emotional abuse as loopholes and could make it harder for you to leave him. You can be free to leave at any time before the potential hit. You are to also inform me of his actions weekly in case there's an event where you need someone else to vouch for you to the authorities. We just need your signature."

Virgil skimmed through the contract with Logan. He thought Logan was overdoing the situation by going so far as to have his lawyer witness Virgil sign the document after just one hit that he couldn't blame Remus for. He had actions he felt the need to do and thoughts he needed to express, like when Virgil feels the need to shout. He looked up at his friend from high school.

"Why would you go this far, Logan? And I don't want statistics to be your excuse," Virgil finally said.

Logan gave Virgil a blank expression before asking Geraci to wait in the living room for them. Once the two were alone in the living room, Logan sat down and took a deep breath. He turned his face and closed his eyes tightly before looking at Virgil.

"You've been my best friend for years. A lot of people have grown tired of me after they witnessed my inability to take a joke or express a lot of emotion. You've been there for me and accepted that I can't express emotions well and that I'm out of touch. You've helped me understand those around me and I've helped you when anxiety gets the best of you. I'll be damned if I lose you to someone who thinks hitting you is the best way to compensate for their obvious inferiority complex!"

Virgil could hear malice in Logan's voice as well as an occasional sniffle in between words. He also saw tears slip down Logan's cheeks. Since Virgil was well aware that Logan didn't always express emotions on a daily basis, he figured the current situation must've been really significant enough to the teacher that he would cry and make anger evident. He figured Logan wouldn't want such a vulnerable side of himself to be shown, so the emo didn't really bring it up; he just shouted, "Mr. Geraci, I'm ready to sign the copies of the contract" and proceeded to give his signature.

After putting his signature on the copies and spending time with Logan, Virgil looked over the contract and thought about all his high school friend had done to make sure he was safe. No matter how much Virgil would tell Logan that he likes Remus, it was obvious that Logan would be stubborn.

For several months, he was able to abide to the agreements of the contract. Virgil didn't tell Remus about what was going on and he informed Logan weekly about what was going on. There wasn't any hitting that has happened, but there were the occasional insults and dismissal of Virgil's anxieties that he would make excuses for. One evening, Virgil wasn't in the mood for intimacy, but Remus would spray some chicken broth from a perfume bottle on himself before rubbing up and down Virgil's thigh before the emo would shift away.

"Come on, baby. You know what it means when I spray myself with Chicken Permission," Remus said in a deep voice.

Virgil forced a chuckle since he used to find it funny for Remus, but found it pretty annoying.

"I know, I know, but I'm not feeling in the mood tonight," Virgil explained.

"Yes, you are, Virgie. Just stop being anxious and we'll have some fun," Remus continued to insist.

Virgil continued to back away until Remus squeezed Virgil's thigh and screamed, "Come on, you buzzkill!" while giving Virgil a punch in the nose. It was enough for Virgil to shove Remus off of him and run to his bedroom with the door locked behind him. Once he looked out the window and saw Remus's car leave from in front of his house, he called Logan and put him on speaker while taking care of his nose. While sniffling, he said only two words that allowed Logan to get the picture:

"Strike two!"

After Virgil's nose healed, he allowed himself to listen to the list of incidents that Logan kept track of and see the incidents from Logan's point of view. He wondered if he would dodge a bullet if he ended the relationship immediately, but he felt he wouldn't be justified for leaving before the third hit.

Eventually, it had been a year since Virgil and Logan had made their arrangement. Remus had his sweet moments and his troubles that Virgil did his best to help him through, although he had to keep his own issues to himself to make sure there weren't any anxieties for Remus to berate him over. He made crude jokes and inappropriate comments towards Virgil that made the Hot Topic addict wish that the third hit happened.

Virgil prepared for some time to himself complete with some snacks, Tim Burton films, a cat pillow his godfather got for him, and even his phone shut off. Before he could lightly touch his butt on the top of the couch, he heard a banging sound on his door and groaned as he walked to open it.

"Hey, sour plum, is your battery dead? I've been trying to text and call you!" Remus said immediately as Virgil opened the door.

"Sorry, Remus. I just wanted some time to myself," Virgil explained while trying to close the door.

"We can be alone together," Remus tried to butt in.

"I don't think that would be a good idea."

"Why? Did that egghead Logan say something to you?"

Virgil froze when he heard that question. During the rare occasions where they were all together, it was clear that Remus hated Logan as much as Logan hated him. Remus thought he was a stick in the mud, which Virgil wouldn't exactly argue with, but he was a stick in the mud that actually possessed more care in his jam-coated fingers than Remus possessed in his whole body.

"Maybe he did, maybe he didn't. I want to be alone and keep myself calm," Virgil answered.

As an attempt to get Virgil out of his way, Remus punched Virgil in the stomach with the intention of him crouching to hold his stomach and provide enough space for him to stride his way into the house. Instead, though, he held his stomach with one hand, shoved Remus off the porch, and closed the door.

Virgil turned his phone on and, though he felt a large amount of pain on his gut, he felt glad that he was able to text Logan the message he wanted to ever since he saw the relationship from an outsider's perspective:

'Strike three. I'm out'