Birds and Bees / by C-Section Comics

Son, come sit on daddy’s knees.

Let’s talk for a moment please.

Let’s discuss the birds and bees –

Hey, stop running! Stop it! Freeze!

Calm down son, just be at ease.

We won’t talk about disease,

we won’t speak of pubic flees,

we won’t chat about dick cheese.

We’ll have no chat on puberty

or how are children made and born.

For this you have the internet.

It’s why god gave us online porn.

We WILL discuss the facts of life,

No, not the stupid TV show.

I’m talking ’bout the facts of life

that every one of us should know.

The most important fact of life

does not relate to intercourse.

It’s all about how birds and bees

can easily kill us, of course.

So mark my words, dear child of mine,

and this will put things in perspective:

A bee-proof suit will surely be

your most efficient contraceptive.

——

Another comic? Here you go:

This parent rants about old times

when online porn had just begun

and wasn’t really worth a dime.