As I was searching for a specific part of every M.A.S.K. cartoon that reminded me of Obama’s Economic Team Formation, I came across this video…

I had to post it, because it is so completely, unbelievably off. I’ve never even heard of half of these shows, and I was a cartoon junkie for that entire decade! However, it completely makes up for its failures with its choice of the #1 song- a show that is mostly forgotten, but was such an amazingly fantastic show… (though it’s theme song is pretty fail.)

I know for many of us 80s Babies out there, this is the most important issue of our time, so let me know how horridly wrong I am…

Without further adieu…

My Top Ten 80s Cartoon Theme Songs after the jump:

10. Transformers

This would rank higher if it was the electric-guitar-god Transformers: The Movie version. And it would easily be #1 (possibly of any song, ever) if it was Stan Bush’s The Touch. Either way, if aliens came to earth in the 80s, this would be the first cultural artifact I would hand them. And the tape would obviously be played in a working version of Soundwave.

9. Thundercats

Hoooooo! I was junked on this song as a kid. If Lik’M’Aid was my cocaine, this was my opium.

8. GI Joe

The fact that I watched this show every day for most of my childhood probably renders my taste moot- I have no idea if this is a good or bad song, I just heard it so damn much, mere exposure phenomenon took over. It would rank higher if it was the GI Joe: The Movie theme song. Cobralalalalalalala!

7. TMNT

‘Nuff said.

6. Jem

Sure, none of us admitted we watched Jem- none of us males that is. But dammit was this show all kinds of awesome, and wow did it set the bar for what we wanted women to be like when we grew up… a combination of Jem and She-Ra. How healthy for society…

5. Muppet Babies

The most postmodern show ever made is also my all-time favorite (well, tied with Alvin). I loved how they got to pretend they were in the Star Wars universe and Oz in the same episode. And I find it weird that most people were positive they’d seen Nanny’s face, and had a similar vision of exactly what it looked like. Proof for God?

4. Heathcliff

I’m not exaggerating in the least when I say that I STILL sing this song to myself a few times a day. This is not an exaggeration. Damn you Heathcliff, for burrowing into my head with your pitch-perfect pop masterpiece! It is easily the most addictive song I’ve ever heard. And it changed my life forever.

3. The Super Mario Bros. Super Show

Rarely has a creative team been so visionary in providing an entire experience for a theme song. It is a travesty that Macarena and Soldja Boy were popular dances in da clubs, and we’ve never ridden a euphoric wave of Do the Mario. My brother and I would always jump up after a rousing episode of TSMBSS and join Cap’n Lou Albano in his incendiary dance. A serious contender for my wedding song.

2. Alvin and the Chipmunks

Every song these rodents touched turned to gold. Not only was this my favorite show as a kid, it was one of the best theme songs we’ve ever had.

1. Disney Afternoon Lineup

I had to group the Disney Afternoon Lineup together- otherwise they would have monopolized the entire list. If there were an infinite amount of money in the world (or in my pocket) I would hire a documentary team to create a doc about the making of the Disney Afternoon theme songs. Clearly they are four of the most important songs written in the twentieth century. (Darkwing is an afterthought.) My brother and I got a cassette tape of the Disney Afternoon theme songs as a gift back in the day, and wore it down until it was dust.

A. Duck Tales

B. Rescue Rangers

C. Gummi Bears

D. Talespin

E. Darkwing Duck