I love Christmas for the same reasons as everyone else. Spending time with family, enjoying the numerous yuletide traditions, helping Frosty the Snowman prevent an invasion of the undead; we end the year healing our hearts with warm memories. One of the most universal traditions of all is the celebration of holiday music, be they more religious in nature (“Silent Night,” “Away In A Manger,” etc.) or wholly secular (“Jingle Bells,” “All I Want For Christmas Is You,” all the classics). Even with that bounty of seasonal goodness, I consider one of the best collections of Christmas music to be Sufjan Stevens’ collective 5 hours of holiday-oriented tunes.

Inside these 5 hours, you’ll not only discover the greatest Christmas song of all time, but one of the greatest songs of all time, “Mr. Frosty Man.”

This song, which doesn’t even last 2 minutes, is a delusional folk punk anthem/character study on Frosty the Snowman. Sufjan discusses Frosty’s cool personality, his affinity for Yo La Tengo, his summer activities (including air conditioning and nothing else), and his friendship with various ice-themed early-90s rappers. From this, we get a good grip on who Frosty is as a (snow)man; he’s a member of the Wu-Tang Clan.

Instrumentally, it’s semi-reminiscent of the track “SuperSexyWoman” off A Sun Came, which may be positive, albeit with a more abrasive edge (demonstrated perfectly within the opening feedback). Sufjan’s (acoustic?) guitar playing is unhinged and sounds like it’s about to fall apart, yet in doing, so the listener is entranced. Sufjan, through sheer chaos alone, manages to force you to pay attention. The bass, mixed quite loudly in the left channel, blasts over Noah Lennox-esque drums. The bridge repeats a sense of dread, demonstrated through the guitar’s continuous strained plucking and a rising feedback loop as Sufjan keeps repeating the snowman’s dreaded name.

After one more verse, the chaos can finally be contained no more as it quickly crashes and burns into a musical mess. This is not a song you can have on in the background; you can’t make small talk with your in-laws over wine while Sufjan is busy doing whippets with your stereo.

“Mr. Frosty Man” is a Christmas song for more… interesting families. Maybe they have a continuous sense of chaos, or perhaps some aunts love to keep the drama afloat, regardless of why it’s a song for them, and that’s beautiful.

The music video is also amazing, I’d just like to mention that.