It honours the war dead – and causes controversy every year

Age: 87.

Appearance: Wonky muffin case containing throat pastille.

What is it? The artificial red flower is an emblem worn to honour the dead from the first world war, and all other wars.

Ah, yes. A time-honoured British tradition. Actually, it was an American idea.

How dare you. It's true. Inspired by the poem In Flanders Field, American schoolteacher Moina Belle Michael bought poppies and sold them to raise money for ex-servicemen. The British Legion adopted the poppy two years later, in 1922.

And the idea took off? It certainly did. Last year 26m poppies were sold, raising £30m.

Twenty-six million! Where are they made? In some terrible sweat shop in Asia? No, they're made in a factory in Richmond, west London, by a team of 50, most of them ex-service people and disabled, working all year round.

It sounds like a noble fund-raising exercise and a straightforward symbol of remembrance to which no possible controversy could attach itself. Remember where you live, man.

What do you mean? Poppies attract controversy in Britain every year: TV presenters being compelled to wear them, Jon Snow's annual refusal to wear one, people wearing them at the wrong time . . .

The wrong time? Although there is no official etiquette, some traditionalists feel the poppy should not be worn outside in the week before Remembrance Sunday. Others say it can be worn from All Souls' Day (2 November) to Armistice Day (11 November).

So do people put them on earlier every year, like Christmas lights? Former minister Tony McNulty was seen wearing one on television on 15 October, before the poppies even went on sale. It has been unkindly suggested that he'd saved last year's.

Do they come in any other colours? The Peace Pledge Union does a white one, for peace.

Do say: "I'll take one of each, just to be on the safe side."

Don't say: "Look! I made my own this year!"