Andrew Chee and Catherine Huong, both in their 40s, seem like two very different people who probably wouldn’t get along.

He is lively, extroverted and wouldn’t stop talking when he’s agitated. She is quiet, rarely angered, and him getting riled up annoys her.

Somehow, despite all this, the two are not only married to each other, but have somehow made it work.

Chee and Huong share their love story with Mothership and tell us why, after close to 25 years, they still continue to choose each other. Every day.

Met during poly days, got married in their 20s

The pair first met while they were studying in Singapore Poly some 30 years ago.

Chee tells us that it was “not love at first sight” and they got to know each other after hanging out together in a group of friends.

Their first date was also a rather spontaneous and simple one in their poly canteen.

“I think it was western food, chicken chop or something like that?” Chee said.

And just like that – the pair got together during their poly days and stayed together even as he served his NS. In the past, NS was a long two and a half years.

While they had dated with the goal of marriage in mind, every year that passed made them more convinced that each other was “the one”. Eventually, they tied the knot when they were around 23 or 24.

Fast forward two decades later, the couple is now proud parents to an eight-year-old daughter.

Having to work through differences together

Speaking candidly about marriage, Chee said that it is “not a fairytale” with happily-ever-afters.

Like every relationship, they also shared that they have their fair share of conflicts and tensions.

Chee confessed that he is the one who “annoys his wife more”, and that his wife gets frustrated because he gets agitated easily.

He also said that they can have squabbles over anything, really – this could be differing opinions on current events or even the most banal of things such as what food to eat or what shampoo to buy.

They have also never agreed on investment decisions because he is comfortable with taking risks while she prefers to be a conservative investor.

“Our profiles are totally opposite,” he stated.

Communication is the key

So, what happens when they disagree on things?

Sometimes, their arguments and teasing add colour to their relationship, he said. What this also means is that there was never any actual need to “resolve” these arguments.

“There is no real anger or sore feelings,” he emphasised. “Don’t ask how we know, we just knew!”

But when it comes to making important decisions, though, he usually trusts his wife to take the wheel, he said.

“Behind every successful man is a woman,” he added.

It is also through years of communication and understanding that they have learnt to arrive at compromises on their differences.

The key to a happy marriage, they explained, are three very important C’s:

“Commitment to each other, communication (it is very important to communicate and clarify) and contentment with what you have!”

As such, they now no longer quarrel over things like who should finish which chores or pay for which bills.

“We have overcome that phase,” they said.

Go on spontaneous dates occasionally

While many couples enjoy celebrating their anniversaries with grand gestures or romantic date nights, they revealed that it’s not really their thing.

“We don’t really do the ‘couple time’ thingy,” they said.

They remind each other when their anniversary date approaches. But other than that, they confessed that they “don’t really bother to celebrate after all these years”.

Instead, most of their dates happen spontaneously when they have some pockets of free time, such as in between their daughter’s classes.

It’s all about the effort

Given how they met through a group of friends, we asked them what they thought about the younger generation using dating apps to find a partner.

Chee said he has heard of dating apps, and thinks young people should be “vigilant” when using the app.

“It’s a good platform to get to know more people but there is also danger,” Hwong said. Couples should also “get to know each other more before committing to marriage”.

Ultimately though, as Chee and Huong have showed, it is not how you meet but rather, the effort you put in that determines a successful relationship.

“Marriage is... a new beginning where love, trust, faith being the foundation, continues to build the marriage...Marriage is not a bed of roses. It requires effort to grow.”

You can see a video of Chee and Huong and other couples respond to questions like how they keep the spark alive after years of marriage, and how they know their partner is ‘the one’.

The video, which involves various couples of different ages, also explores how they have made their partnership last through the years.

Another partnership that has survived the test of time is Esso and DBS.

To celebrate their 25th anniversary of collaborating, they are holding an exclusive Porsche ice driving experience lucky draw. The grand prize is a 5D4N Porsche Ice Driving Experience in Finland.

All DBS and POSB credit and debit cardmembers get one chance with every S$60 spent at any Esso service station in Singapore. In addition, DBS Esso credit card members get two chances with every S$60 spent outside of Esso.

You can visit here for more information.

Top photo composite image, photos courtesy of Andrew Chee.

This sponsored article by Esso made the writer wish that she has a real-life love story that is as remarkable as this (she doesn’t).