This is an emergency. There’s an epidemic in New Orleans! This city has become “Ground Zero” for the most disgusting sickness known to mankind. The NOLA Referee Virus is starting to spread. If you haven’t heard of this sickness, you must be hiding under the swamp.

Here’s the definition of the NOLA Ref Virus(NRV):

A revolting sickness that causes professionally trained sporting officials, that are paid to uphold league rules in an unbiased fashion, to become thoroughly inebriated, shortsighted, foolish, asinine, deranged, deaf and/or blind when enforcing said rules against New Orleans based teams… and, not enforcing said rules against New Orleanian teams’ opponents.

Yes, I made up that definition. Yes, It’s absolutely, without a doubt, 100% factually correct. We first saw the disgusting NRV on the NFL gridiron with the New Orleans Saints. Here’s a brief reminder:

#NolaNoCall

Pretty unreal fan angle of the Blown PI call in the Saints Rams game. pic.twitter.com/7MVa4MM45t — AMC A-List Member (@Ryanwtking) January 21, 2019

We don’t need to stay here long. The whole sports world knows what happened here. But, as you can see in that video, three NFL officials were completely incapacitated due to obvious symptoms of NRV!

NRV would show up again in NOLA during Week 1 of the 2019 NFL season. Right before halftime, the Saints were driving downfield and the sickness caused the officials to not only miss the call on the field that would have given the Saints a first down but inexplicably review the call and then take about half of the time that should have been on the clock off. The result was a missed Wil Lutz 56-yard FG attempt. Luckily, the boys in black and gold were able to sneak out of that game with a victory despite the atrocious calls on account of the NRV.

It didn’t take long for NRV to infect more referees during the NFC Championship rematch during week 2 in Los Angeles…

WE ALMOST HAD A BIG MAN TOUCHDOWN. How did they blow that dead?! #Saints pic.twitter.com/cxBi2GgTXD — Roto Street Journal (@RotoStJournal) September 15, 2019

A play that should have never been called dead was, in fact, blown dead. There would be a review and the Saints would get the ball. However, despite a magnificent effort by Cam Jordan, the touchdown was called back wiping out a lead in a revenge game many in New Orleans had circled on their calendar. The only possible explanation is NOLA Ref Virus, right!?

Why Is This Still Happening?

Fast forward to Week 14. The 49ers came down to NOLA for a matchup atop of the NFC. There were many signs of the infection during this game as well. None more interesting than this call:

Fake punt/pass by Taysom Hill. Great throw to Tre’Quan Smith… but the 49ers DB is allowed to bear-hug him so he can’t get back to ball.



Sean Payton yells: “That was holding!”



The NFL rules are a complete mess. And it just never seems to not make sense in the #Saints’ benefit pic.twitter.com/6OCWt5Mvnu — Jeff Nowak (@Jeff_Nowak) December 8, 2019

I’m not really a rules expert. But anytime that one player grabs another player by the shoulder pad and proceeds to hold it for the duration of the entire play, it’s holding, right? This is true on both pass plays and punt plays. Definitely some NRV here!

The virus must have remained highly contagious in whichever New Orleans area hotel NFL officials stay in. The crew this week showed symptoms of NRV while the legendary Drew Brees was chasing history.

This was straight-up WILD. Drew Brees scrambles and finds Tre’Quan Smith for the record-setting TD, but it’s called back for OPI. Players celebrate something that they’ll now have to do again, settle for a FG.#Saints fans throw out the loudest “refs you suck” chant yet. Wow. pic.twitter.com/IvNMmG3qa6 — Jeff Nowak (@Jeff_Nowak) December 17, 2019

Tre’Quan Smith broke his defender’s ankles and barely grazes his back while the guy is bumbling by. Offensive Pass Interference. THE AUDACITY! The NRV infected officials took away history! Drew would break and exceed the record later in the game, however, that isn’t the point. The point is the continued injustice!

Yeah not sure if that was OPI on Tre’Quan Smith. The fans are yelling “REF YOU SUCK!” @wdsu pic.twitter.com/ac6Hz0Dkx9 — Sharief Ishaq (@ShariefWDSU) December 17, 2019

The Epidemic Jumps Leagues

Yes, these refs suck. Though, what’s even more concerning, is that NRV is crossing over to the NBA now! Pelicans’ fans are a tortured bunch as it is. Promises of Zion and competitive basketball have produced nothing but injuries, bad defense, and losing.

FINAL: Magic 130, Pelicans 119.



New Orleans has lost 12 consecutive games. A new franchise record for futility.



This team stinks. — Scott Kushner (@ScottDKushner) December 15, 2019

Now, there have been early warning signs that some NRV may be gestating inside the bodies of NBA officials. The Pelicans rank near the bottom of the league in both being called for fouls and the number of free throws taken. These are fishy statistics, however, nothing really substantial. Going into their game this past Tuesday, the Pelicans had an appalling record of 6-21. They were on a 12-game skid. Things were tied 93-93 near the end of the final quarter against the Brooklyn Nets, and then this happened.

Refs screw the Pelicans by not calling shot clock violation on Nets and giving the Pels the ball with 2.5 seconds left on the clock. pic.twitter.com/GhpNi3qxtQ — gifdsports (@gifdsports) December 18, 2019

The ball CLEARLY goes off the backboard. The result should have been a shot clock violation and Pelican’s ball with about 2.7 seconds left. The Pels had a timeout remaining and could have then advanced the ball to half-court giving themselves plenty of time to get a game-winning shot attempt up.

In reality, however, the refs deemed that the ball touched the rim which allows the clock to run. This sent the game to overtime. Here is the explanation given by the League’s Official Twitter account:

Transcript: NBA Referee Kevin Scott Comments to Pool Reporter after Nets – Pelicans game. pic.twitter.com/SzKM1fY5KT — NBA Official (@NBAOfficial) December 18, 2019

Ah-ha! Ok, we get it. A technicality. But rules are rules, and they are just doing their job, right? Two more highly questionable, if not outright incorrect, calls did not go the Pels’ way in overtime. The results were their 13th straight defeat.

We Get It!

Now we know that you can’t review a call without a stoppage of play immediately. Alright, bet! The very next day, the Pelicans are in Minnesota playing the T’Wolves and this happens:

In the prev game, #NBA said they couldn’t review the shot clock vio because too much time passed before stoppage. Less than 3 seconds passed. Here, no-call: 9 seconds elapse before a whistle. Reviewed. 2 points taken away from #Pelicans & off. foul given to Ingram. #NBATwitter pic.twitter.com/z9RVDgWVCe — GHOST_HTM (@TheGhostSports) December 19, 2019

Wait wait wait! NBA, you just said that the rules state you can’t review a play after a certain amount of time goes by. And, the previous night, a mere three seconds went by to make it unreviewable. In this situation, nine seconds elapse on a play where there was no whistle blown on the call. Yet, it’s reviewed!?

The only explanation is that NRV is being directly administered to these officials during their meetings the same way the general public gets a flu shot! This shit is straight up kooky! NOLA Ref Virus is a serious condition that is taking over all professional leagues with ties to New Orleans. Baby Cakes better watch out! The Jesters are in serious danger! Let’s hope that this wretched illness is limited to professional leagues only! And, if it isn’t, let’s pray it steers clear of Baton Rouge and our beloved LSU Tigers this bowl season!