Last year, just for fun, Cassandra Fear of Lakewood’s boutique chocolate shop Fear’s Confections created “Trump Dumps,” little chocolate turds with swaths of golden frosting on the top, for the Republican National Convention. They proved so popular she brought them back for Election Day, promising never to make them again if he won.

But she broke her promise — again, a deluge of requests spurred her to bring them back for the inauguration. So she spent her post-holidays downtime cranking out the tiny treats. Unfortunately, the renewed attention brought out the crazies (surprise!) who not only posted negative reviews on Yelp! despite never having set foot in the store (one claimed to have found a cockroach in a cupcake he purchases, although Fear has never made cupcakes) but also phoned in a bomb threat.

That spurred her friends, neighbors and fans to launch and subscribe to a GoFundMe campaign to pay for an enhanced security system and organize a Cash Mob, during which she had nearly 200 customers, her best day ever. Many customers came in looking for the Trump Dumps, which are back-ordered. “People said, ‘As long as I’m here, I’ll buy something — I just want to support you,’” she says.

They’ve also discovered one of the best chocolate shops in town, with such treats as sea salt caramels (pictured), brownies in flavors ranging from banana to bacon, and special occasion chocolates. She says that as a result of the publicity, business has never been better. Apparently non-customers in Florida and Michigan threatening to “boycott” her hasn’t hurt.

Oh, and the GoFundMe campaign has raised far more than she needs for enhanced security. She plans to donate the rest — she says it will be a healthy sum — to Planned Parenthood. Take that, bullies.

And come on, don’t you want some of those caramels right NOW?

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