(My boyfriend and I are walking across campus joking with each other, and I push him off the sidewalk.)

Me: “I like you so much, I push you off sidewalks.”

Boyfriend: “I like you so much, I’d pick you up and throw you in the mountain.”

Me: “I like you so much, I’d hit you in the face with a shovel.”

Boyfriend: “I like you so much, I’d push you down the stairs.”

Me: “No, save that for if I accidentally get pregnant!”