Guys. GUYS! It's really happening this time. Half-Life 3. Really! It's coming, and I have the proof right here!

Wait, come back. I know you don't really trust me after that European trademark application a few years ago turned out to be a bust. I know you've lost hope after nearly eight years of waiting and internal leaks suggesting that the game is no longer happening

But just search through the files for the latest update to Dota 2 on your hard drive. See the file labeled "hl3.txt" in the core/tools/help/fgd folder? That's right, "hl3!" Do you realize what "hl3" could stand for?

It could stand for Half-Life 3!

Still not convinced? Well just look through the contents of the file, why don't you. Look, there's a bit that mentions a "Combine Pulse Ceiling Turret." And another that mentions quest members that are "Neutral to Combine and [don't] take damage." Do you know what famous video game franchise has an organization called The Combine? Do you?

It's Half-Life! The Combine is from Half-Life!

Oh man, Half-Life 3 is going to be so great. Just look at all the features alluded to in this file. Squads full of citizens that can participate in combat! A "VR chaperone" to guide players through virtual reality! Invincible hunters! "Facial expression override!" OK, that last one isn't that exciting, but still...

Why are you still looking at me like I'm crazy? You say that the mention of DirectX 7 ("DX7") in this file means it's probably roughly a million years old? You say that most of the references to internal Valve map-making functions are so generic as to be meaningless? You say that the file could be completely unrelated to Half-Life or intentional trolling on Valve's part?

Why? Why do you insist on denying the truth when the evidence is right in front of you? Half-Life 3 is real, and it is coming, and it will be amazing, and it will be worth the wait, and GabeN will redeem us all through the glory of his beneficence. Oh great Newell, heed not the unbelievers. They know not of how awesome Half-Life 3 will be.

Not me, though. I want to believe. I want to believe!