This week the world as well as my local community celebrated International Women’s Day, I was invited to speak at the event my city hosted. I prepared a lecture on intersectional feminism. Knowing that I would be speaking to an audience primarily comprised of white middle class Mormon women I planned a lecture that would inflict just enough discomfort to raise awareness. My lecture went well, and the audience seemed to receive my criticisms of mainstream feminism with curiosity and interest. Due to my hectic schedule I could only be present for one additional lecture and a panel discussion of the event. However I spent every free moment I had that day following the topic of #IWD2016 on social media. Both in person and online conversations centered on the role of motherhood; I’m not sure why I was surprised, because in all of the communities I am connected to female identity is enmeshed with this role. For some reason I had mentally prepared to celebrate women and the female identity not a particular role that some of them fill. After all mothers already have a day where they are celebrated.

As an intersectional feminist I am concerned and invested in all marginalized groups, particularly all women. While I am not a mother I do care about issues that affect mothers e.g. public breastfeeding, reproductive rights, maternity leave, accessible child care etc. Sadly what was solidified on #IWD2016 is that the mothers as a group of people do not even see childless women let alone be concerned with issues that impact us.

Some women are infertile, some are childless by choice, or by lack of opportunity. Being childless does not make us any less female. Our goodness, worth, value, and contributions as women are bread from our soul not our ability or choice to reproduce. Not only are the material contributions of childless overlooked and erased but for Mormons the spiritual experiences of childless women are considered inferior. The highest level of exaltation for Mormon women is to be an eternal mother; one observation I have made of many of my Mormnon feminist friends is that they seem to feel connected to Heavenly Mother through their own motherhood. I have heard countless explanations about this relationship being possible threw their role as a mother. As if somehow childless women cannot fully connect to the feminine divine or do not truly understand the love of their Mother in Heaven because of their childlessness. This is idea is both illogical and hurtful. I have a personal and special relationship with Mother God independent of any earthly role or relationship.

I have a suspicion that if there were a holiday dedicated to the celebration of men (which isn’t warranted because that is basically every other day of the year) it would not revolve about their fatherhood. My hope is that all women will recognize their inherent worth and potential independent of the role of motherhood. We were perfectly made and our humanity is not a contingency. Our existence does not come with an asterisk or prescription. Join me in truly celebrating the essence women, our marrow, our divinity, and our imperfect perfection.