In the aftermath of last week’s Dallas shooting that claimed the lives of five police officers, a trauma surgeon at Parkland Memorial Hospital in Dallas reveals that he is conflicted between helping the seven wounded and also distrusting cops over the years.

In a live press conference from yesterday, Dr. Brian H. Williams explains his wide range of emotions as he helped save the lives of police.

“I also, personally, feel and understand that angst when you cross the path of an officer in uniform and you are fearing for your safety,” he recalls. “I’ve been there and I understand that, but it does not condone disrespecting and killing police officers. That’s something I am struggling with constantly.”