Once in a while, a publication asks who the greatest American of our lifetime is. And while Cracked would never presume to answer that question, we absolutely can. Is it Zombie Teddy Roosevelt? The puppeteer who made Ronald Reagan come alive? Former San Antonio Spurs center David Robinson?

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You have to admit he's a frontrunner.

Strong contenders, all, but no. Sit down, neighbor, and hear of a man who did not conquer the world, but did it one better; he reminded us that the world needs unity rather than conquest. He walked among us as a man, although he was a hand-to-God saint. They say the difference between a saint and a psychopath is empathy, and Mr. Fred Rogers had an ocean of it, which makes him either the sanest man in history or the craziest hero we ever had.

If you're from some country that doesn't have puppets and never heard of Mister Rogers' Neighborhood, it's OK! He loves you anyway. In fact, he'd want to introduce you to all of us so we could learn from you. So go tell us something wonderful about your people in the comments.

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As for the rest of us, here are amazing videos of Mr. Rogers that prove Tom Junod's Esquire profile of him accounts for his greatness in the grime of the real world. Go ahead, read it. It is the only permissible instance of the phrase "[Mr. Rogers'] bobbing nudity."