It's basic supply and demand. People really seem to like doing drugs at music festivals—specifically Bonnaroo!—so two young entrepreneurs allegedly brought what police described as "a very large amount of drugs" to the music festival. But the police are wrong. These two did not allegedly bring "a very large amount of drugs," they allegedly brought a whole fuckload of drugs to Bonnaroo.

The Tennessean reports that Brian Anthony Wiley, 29, and Trevor Franklin Watson III, 24, were arrested on multiple drug charges after police said they caught them with more drugs than they were able to accurately calculate. Here's what police said they caught Wiley with:

202 jars of THC oil, weighing about 15 milliliters; two bags of mushrooms, weighing about 7 grams each; three bags with about 60 panes of blotter acid; 241 bags of about 120.5 grams of what is believed to be Ketamine; 22 bags of a white powdery substance weighing about 144.5 grams of what is believed to be cocaine; six Xanax bars; and 220 bags weighing about 1,210 grams of a green plantlike material believed to be marijuana.

That's a shitton of drugs! And we're not done yet. Here's what police said Watson had:

Six bottles containing 15 milliliters of THC oil; 10 bags of a green plantlike material weighing about 20 grams believed to be marijuana; two grams of a white powdery substance believed to be cocaine; four Molly capsules; 14 bags of a crystal substance weighing about 14 grams of a substance believed to be Molly; and 13 bags of a powdery substance weighing about 13 grams believed to be Ketamine.

Oh, also a ton of cash.

This makes Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas sound like a church picnic.

Where the hell were they keeping all of this?

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Matt Miller Culture Editor Matt is the Culture Editor at Esquire where he covers music, movies, books, and TV—with an emphasis on all things Star Wars, Marvel, and Game of Thrones.

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