Thank the Lord Theresa May has spoken up in defence of Christmas, saying we can no longer tolerate a situation in which people are afraid to mention Christmas in the office.

For too long, brave Christmas rebels have been forced to crawl behind the coffee machine to whisper “tinsel” as an act of defiance, like dissidents in Soviet Russia. Paratroopers swoop across buildings on zip-wires to break into offices and put a tiny Christmas tree outside the toilet. When the managers see it the next morning, they immediately torch it with a flame thrower so as not to offend Zen Buddhists. But it’s a symbolic victory for Christmas, and that’s what matters.

She’s right that we daren’t seem to mention Christmas anymore. All the adverts now say, “This year, give your family the treat they deserve for Pagan Solstice dinner, and make it a Midwinter Celebration of Darkness as the Earth Tilts to its Optimum Angle from the Sun creating Minimum Daylight they’ll always remember with Jacobs Cream Crackers.”

How many workplaces in December ever play Christmas songs? In every shopping centre they’re blaring out Kendrick Lamarr and Tibetan chanting. In every railway station in Suffolk they play one Islamic call to prayer after another.

John Lewis recreate Christmas adverts using Lego

If you want to hear “Merry Christmas Everybody” by Slade, or “I Wish it Could be Christmas Every Day” byWizzard you have to tune into BBC 6 Music’s Noel Hour at 2am or visit an underground Christmas music club in Berlin.

The report the Prime Minister praised, which claimed that too many politically correct employers are victimising Christians, was issued the Equality and Human Rights Commission. The Daily Mail and The Sun published a large section of the report. Isn’t that typical of these whinging do-gooding papers which rush to endorse anything that the so-called “Equality and Human Rights” lobby dreams up.

The report singles out workplaces that “fail to celebrate Christmas for fear of offending other staff”. This is so true. Go into Starbucks and the staff wear absolutely no reindeer antlers or Christmas jumpers with Christmas puddings, or any symbol of Christmas at all, during the first two weeks in August. It’s probably because they’re scared of upsetting Hindus.

And in most supermarkets you can barely spot the word Christmas this month – apart from across the outside and the inside, and over hoardings and boards, and on signs over the pot plants saying, “This year beat the Christmas rush on pot plants with our Christmas ‘Away in a Hydrangea’ Christmas special Christmas offer.”

The report went on to explain that employers are "victimising Christians”, according to the Mail, by “deriding Government departments and town halls that use messages such as ‘Season’s Greetings’ on cards instead of ‘Happy Christmas’. We’ve seen some awful examples of victimisation against Christians over the centuries, but even the Romans wouldn’t have gone that far.

That’s why we all know the verse in the book of Matthew that starts: “Pontius Pilate did wash his hands and look unto the greeting that lay upon the inside of the card. And he did say unto the crowd ‘It sayeth not the word Christmas. You’ve gone too far this time you vicious politically correct bastards’. And from then on he did draweth the line at crucifixions.”

Go into most offices these days on Christmas Day, and there’s barely any sign that it’s Christmas at all – apart from the fact it’s shut and there’s no one there. And that’s probably because all the Christians have been chased away by jihadists.

Conservative MP Fiona Bruce explained how bad the situation is, with Christians being “fearful” to mention their religion. This is why we should be grateful to heroic freedom fighters such as the people who make Songs of Praise. Every week, like the French Resistance, they risk their lives to broadcast their message to lift the spirits of those who are too terrified to say “Christmas” in public.

Even where Christianity is permitted, Christian children are forced to sing hymns with lines such as “Sun and moon bow down before him”, which is disgracefully disrespectful, suggesting stars and comets and other bits of space don’t bow or even curtsey before GOD, probably because they don’t want to offend the Sikhs.

The Prime Minister finished her comments by saying: “I’m sure we all want to ensure people at work are able to speak quite freely about Christmas.” This is the type of stirring rhetoric we expect from a leader, and next week she’ll probably go even further and proclaim, “And let me tell you this – Christmas means Christmas.”

Christmas celebrations around the world Show all 30 1 /30 Christmas celebrations around the world Christmas celebrations around the world Virginia, USA A man dressed as Santa Claus water skis alongside reindeer on the Potomac River in Alexandra, Virginia. Christmas celebrations around the world Berlin, Germany A volunteer dressed in a Father Christmas (Santa Claus) outfit distributes gifts to children of asylum-seekers, as they arrive at the Schoenefeld train station near Berlin on December 24, 2015, before being dispatched to various refugee centres in or near the German capital. Christmas celebrations around the world Rio De Janeiro, Brazil Leandro Wendell dos Santos, 14, wearing a Santa Claus costume, plays with kids as he walks along the alley of the Mare slums complex to distribute presents to children in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil. Leandro is part of a volunteer group of residents of Mare slums complex that distributes donated toys to children of the community. Christmas celebrations around the world Heilongjiang province, China Winter swimmers (L) look on as a man (R) wearing a Santa Claus hat and beard jumps into a pool carved into thick ice covering the Songhua River, to celebrate the upcoming Christmas, in Harbin, Heilongjiang province, China, Christmas celebrations around the world Tokyo, Japan In Japan Christmas is not a national holiday, however it has developed into a celebration of western culture with KFC being the most popular place to eat on December 25th. KFC's around Japan regularly see street-long lines and advanced bookings Christmas celebrations around the world Manila, Philippines Filipinos crowd a store that is popular in selling hams as they do last-minute shopping on Christmas eve in Manila, Philippines. The predominantly Roman Catholic Philippines boasts of having the longest Christmas celebration that starts every last quarter of the year. Christmas celebrations around the world Budapest, Hungary A man buys Christmas sweets at a supermarket on the outskirts of Budapest, Hungary. Hungarians could outspend last year's record on seasonal treats and Christmas fondants, giving some premium brands a hard time to keep up with strong demand. Christmas celebrations around the world Bethlehem, West Bank Nigerian pilgrims gather at the Church of Nativity in Bethlehem, West Bank. Every year thousands of Christian pilgrims travel to the church that marks the site of the cave in which Jesus is said to have been born. Christmas celebrations around the world Bogota, Colombia Christmas lights adorn the Usaquen park in Bogota, Colombia. The blow to Colombiaís holiday tradition is poignant given that El Nino is thought to be a reference to the baby Jesus, a name given to the climatic phenomenon long ago by South Americans who noted that it seemed to arrive around Christmas time. Christmas celebrations around the world Cairns, Australia Bon Bon, a 12-month-old koala, celebrating with Christmas decorations at the Rainforestation Nature Park in Cairns, Australia, Christmas celebrations around the world Ayutthaya, Thailand A young Thai student wearing a Santa hat poses for a photograph during a Christmas event at a school in the world heritage city of Ayutthaya, north of Bangkok, Thailand, 24 December 2015. The annual event is one of many held to celebrate the Christmas season in predominantly Buddhist Thailand. Christmas celebrations around the world Colombo, Sri Lanka Sri Lankan pedestrians walk past a decorated Christmas tree in Colombo. The leader of Sri Lanka's Catholics urged priests on not to put up Christmas trees in their churches over the festive period, saying they had no religious significance. Sri Lanka is a mainly Buddhist country but around 1.2 million of its overall population of 21 million people are Catholics. Christmas celebrations around the world Seoul, South Korea Models wearing Santa Claus costumes wait to attend a special event to promote business in coincide with Christmas at Shinsegae department store in Seoul, South Korea. A lot of South Korean companies take advantage of the Christmas season to promote their business amid weak sales and economic slowdown. Christmas celebrations around the world Ayutthaya, Thailand A young Thai student wearing a Santa hat poses for a photograph during a Christmas event at a school in the world heritage city of Ayutthaya, north of Bangkok, Thailand, 24 December 2015. The annual event is one of many held to celebrate the Christmas season in predominantly Buddhist Thailand. Christmas celebrations around the world Oaxaca, Mexico Carved radishes are displayed during the celebration of the "Night of the Radishes" at the Ocototlan de Morelos community in Oaxaca State, Mexico. The Night of the Radishes is an annual carving event two days before christmas that has its origins in the colonial period when radishes were introduced by the Spanish. Farmers began carving radishes into figures as a way to attract customers attention during the Christmas market. Christmas celebrations around the world Seoul, South Korea A man dressed as Santa Claus walks on zebra crossing during a Christmas charity event in central Seoul, South Korea Christmas celebrations around the world Istanbul, Turkey A Greek school's principal, Yani Demircioglu, surrounded by Greek Orthodox children, plays an accordion during a Christmas celebration at the main shopping and pedestrian street of Istiklal in central Istanbul Reuters Christmas celebrations around the world Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia A boy meets Father Christmas at a shopping mall in Kuala Lumpur Christmas celebrations around the world Manila, Philippines A fire-breather performs during a street show on Christmas Eve in Baclaran, City of Paranaque Christmas celebrations around the world Saltillo, Mexico Volunteers take part in a traditional Mexican Christmas celebration known as Posada Mexicana at a migrant shelter in Saltillo, Mexico. Posada Mexicana commemorates the journey of the Holy Family from Galilee to Bethlehem Christmas celebrations around the world Rio de Janeiro, Brazil Italian artist Gaspare di Caro, right, lights up Christ the Redeemer in Rio Reuters Christmas celebrations around the world Allahabad, India A view of All Saints Cathedral, decorated ahead of Christmas celebrations, in Allahabad Christmas celebrations around the world Guatemala City, Guatemala Firefighter Hector Chacon, centre, dressed as Father Christmas, delivers gifts to impoverished children after descending from a 150-metre bridge, behind Christmas celebrations around the world Karachi, Pakistan A Father Christmas is painted onto a wall in a Christian neighbourhood in Karachi Christmas celebrations around the world Valletta, Malta 3D projections designed by students of the Malta College of Arts, Science and Technology are projected onto the facade of the Presidential Palace Christmas celebrations around the world Moscow, Russia A snowman and Christmas tree erected in Red Square EPA Christmas celebrations around the world Taipei, Taiwan People crowd around for a view of a 3D Christmas tree erected in a shopping park EPA Christmas celebrations around the world Tokyo, Japan Cleaners dressed in a Father Christmas and a reindeer costume clean the windows of a shopping mall EPA Christmas celebrations around the world Shanghai, China A woman prays at the Shanghai International Chapel during a Christmas Eve Mass Reuters Christmas celebrations around the world A Bangladeshi man dressed as Father Christmas entertains children during an event to mark Christmas Day in Dhaka

Because this year at last we have a Prime Minister who won’t tolerate the persecution of people who speak freely about Christmas. For too long we’ve seen armed police bash down doors in a library or a branch of Kwik-Fit, and drag someone away in a van because they’ve been overheard saying “We had a goose this year instead of a turkey, by way of a change.”

The time has come when we should be able to say “I fell asleep after The Chase Christmas Special” without being in fear of our lives.

“Christians have lost their jobs due to their faith”, the report says, and there are too many incidents of this, in which you hear someone was sacked for saying “The LORD Jesus Christ our saviour came into this earth to die for our sins, born of a virgin in Bethlehem, hallelujah” because they’re a bingo caller and say it before each number.