Governor-elect Charlie Baker said on Wednesday that his first goal, post-election, is to hire a “great team.’’

His second should be to learn how to high-five.

Throughout the campaign, Baker has attempted to touch people’s hands with something approximating a high-five, but which does not deserve to be called a high-five. Sometimes it starts out as a high-five—and the recipient certainly seems to expect a high-five—only for one of Baker’s massive hands to grab and envelop its prey.

Like this:

Here it is just before his primary victory speech:

I think he broke this woman’s wrist:


He managed not to consume his victim’s hand here, but this high-five is still ruined because he held his hand up way too high so the little girl had to jump to reach it. It’s hard not to believe this was done deliberately; he’s crouched down to the girl’s level already so all he had to do was hold his hand out at eye level. As a short person, I find this offensive. Why, Charlie?

Looks like someone finally pulled Charlie aside and told him to work on his follow-through (“please stop grabbing’’), but it’s not quite there yet. That or the jogger below figured out that the only way to avoid her hand being swallowed by the Charlie-Claw was to high-five without slowing down:

What even is this:

At Boston.com, we’re here to help. We’ve draw up a helpful how-to guide for Baker to consult while he tries to learn this new skill.

If all else fails, our new governor should pull a Howie Mandel and go fist bump only. He’s pretty good at those!

Good luck, Charlie!