6.

"At 13 I had to explain to my own mother that you CAN pee with a tampon in. At which point she rolled her eyes and said, 'Oh so you have THREE holes.' And I was like 'Well, of vastly different sizes but, technically, yes.'

"My dad and two little sisters started screaming that they didn't want to hear anymore. I gleefully informed them that, as her only C-section baby, I was the only one present in the room who had not been in my mother's vagina."