Prime minister says the only way to prevent such incidents is to stop the boats

The prime minister, Tony Abbott, has expressed regret that an asylum seeker mother was separated from her newborn baby but won’t apologise for “what happens when people come to Australia illegally by boat”.

The Rohingya woman from Myanmar gave birth in Brisbane last week after being flown from Nauru and was only allowed to see her baby son for a few hours a day while he was still in hospital four days later.

She was reportedly moved back to a Brisbane detention centre while her newborn son remained in hospital.

"Obviously I deeply regret that," Abbott said. "If you want to avoid these things you've got to stop the boats," he said on Friday in Colombo, Sri Lanka, where he is attending the Commonwealth Heads of Government meeting.

"I don't, as it were, apologise for what happens when people come to Australia illegally by boat."

The immigration minister Scott Morrison has ordered a review into the circumstances of the case. At the weekly Sovereign Borders media briefing Morrison repeated his defence that it was common practice for mothers not to stay overnight in hospital with their babies if the babies were unwell.

Morrison said it was true she did not stay some nights with her son but she had two other children to care for in the Brisbane detention facility, although he had ordered a review of the circumstances.

“The issue here was also bed restrictions. Bed restrictions don’t apply only to people who might be transferees in this situation, they apply to Australians as well and I’m sure no one is suggesting that anyone who found themselves in this situation as an asylum seeker should be receiving preferential treatment to any other Australian in this instance,” he said.

He denied reports that the woman’s husband was not allowed to see his newborn son, but said he did not know how many visits the man had been allowed or when he visited.

When asked if Nauru had suitable medical facilities for disabled children, since it did not have suitable pre-natal care, Morrison said there were disabled people in the detention centre receiving “appropriate” care.

“It doesn’t matter how much education you’ve had, it doesn’t matter whether you’ve come from Syria, Iran, Iraq, Afghanistan, anywhere else, it doesn’t matter whether you’re a child, it doesn’t matter whether you’re pregnant, it doesn’t matter whether you’re a woman, it doesn’t matter whether you’re an unaccompanied minor, it doesn’t matter if you have a health condition, if you’re fit enough to get on a boat then you can expect you’re fit enough to end up in offshore processing,” he said.

During the press conference Morrison also confirmed the arrival of asylum seekers in Darwin on Monday and did not deny that crew on a customs boat had passed the asylum seekers a note while they were still at sea telling them to turn around.

When asked if he was aware of the practice, Morrsion said: “Of course I’m aware of what we do, we make sure people understand what our policies are whether that is at sea, whether that’s in Indonesia, whether that’s in Malaysia, whether that’s in Pakistan or Iran or any of these places, we make sure anyone who is seeking to come illegally to Australia by boat knows that it’s a vain effort.”

Earlier in the press conference Operation Sovereign Borders commander Lieutenant General Angus Campbell said two other boats had arrived on Christmas Island during the past week.

The three boats carried a total of 163 passengers and eight crew.

When asked if there were still asylum seekers in Darwin from the arrival during the week because of issues with their medical clearances, Campbell replied: “Those people and those people who arrived on Christmas Island immediately enter into the 48-hour rapid transfer process. There may well be some who don’t complete that process in 24 hours, but the great majority do.”

Campbell again defended the practice of not announcing the arrival of boats immediately or giving details on the asylum seekers on board.

“Releasing demographic information also risks encouraging the chain migration of those of similar circumstance to use boats in an attempt, a futile attempt, to get to Australia,” he said.