The TV world is a bit of a bummer this afternoon. Britney Spears and her kooky facial expressions are leaving X Factor, my beloved Stars in Danger: The High Dive did TERRIBLE in the ratings (meaning we’ll probably never see Stars in Danger: Big Wave Surfing or Stars in Danger: SNAKES!), and even though he said he “loves” Happy Endings and Don’t Trust the B—- in Apartment 23 because they’re “watercooler shows” that are “really well-written” — which is great news, technically — ABC entertainment Paul Lee was non-committal about their future, saying “We haven’t made any decisions [about next season].” BUT I WANNA KNOW NOW GEEZ COME ON.

So, instead of digging too deeply into any of that stuff and potentially bumming everyone — including myself — out, I’m just going to post this very, very NSFW video that our pal Oliver Noble made of all of David Duchovny’s sexual encounters on Californication. How many partners has Duchovny’s character, Hank Moody, had during the show’s five seasons? I won’t spoil it, but let’s just say more than Chandler, Ross, Monica, and Rachel on Friends.

Californication returns for a sixth season on the 13th. If he gets on a little hot streak, he may even be able to catch Phoebe. Joey? No way.

via HuffPo