He stood there, all eyes on him as he wondered how he got himself into this mess. The giggles from onlookers made him want to crawl into a hole. What the hell am I doing? A glare from Toni, his boss, reminded him of his contractual obligations, so he pasted a smile on his face; a smile that was more painful to wear than the cupid costume he was in.

“As we rehearsed,” she whispered in his ear.

“I can’t.”

“You can and you will. Our contract says so.”

He walked to the front of the booth and began.

“If you can imagine it, you can do it. We specialize in romantic singing telegrams, and you are our cupid.”

I can’t believe it has come to this. I am standing here in a diaper and wings. He held up the bow and arrow, and with a smile, he pretended to shoot it at the ladies passing by. Edward was not what you would imagine a cupid to be. He wasn’t a cute little cherub. He had a belly that hung over the edge of the diaper. One would imagine cupid to have locks of gold on his head, but Edward had none. His head was completely shaved. Instead of looking like some kind of God, he looked like something you would see in the circus. In this getup, he felt completely emasculated; so opposite from his typical persona. He was the kind of guy people feared when they walked by, and now, they ridiculed him.

As he stood there, he thought about the day an old friend had called, and about his decision that would change everything. When did my desires become more important than my pride? How does one go from having strong morals to this? What change inside someone caused this? How can one rash decision change the course of someone’s life? He never thought about the effects this would have on his life, or how it would affect his family.

The music from the stage across the convention center blared but wasn’t loud enough to drown out the comments of the people pointing and snickering. All Edward wanted to do was to go back in time; rewind time to before the call, but he knew he couldn’t. He looked at his watch.

“Nearly twelve-thirty,” he sighed.

At one o’clock, Fantasy Frenzy was to take the stage, and Edward was to be its star performer. He knew the act. He had practiced it over and over until it was near perfect. That wasn’t the problem. He was nervous because this would be the point where everyone found out his secret. There were news cameras stationed at each end of the stage, and he had no doubt in his mind they would capture his debut performance.

“It’s time to go backstage and get ready.”

“I can’t do this.”

You have no choice.”

“But I…”

“No excuses get back there.”

With his head lowered, he began walking. He felt the dread begin to consume him. He felt his body get heavier with each step. He could feel everyone’s eyes burning into the back of his head. They followed him as he continued his walk of shame, the death of the life he knew. After this, nothing would be the same again. What will my friends think of me; what will my kids think? He looked up for a moment to find his way to the stage when he noticed someone who looked very familiar to him. He hastened his pace so as not to be noticed, and entered the door marked “authorized personnel only”.

There was a buzz of people getting ready for their performances as well. No one seemed to pay much attention to Edward. Backstage he was not out of the ordinary. Everyone was in the same situation as him. A more than feminine man approached him with a clipboard.

“Who are you, honey” he signaled Edward to come closer.

“I am here for Fantasy Frenzy” Edward relayed in nothing more than a loud whisper.

“Come, sign in over here.”

“Okay.”

Edward grabbed a pen and filled out the paper in front of him. For a moment he thought about putting a fake name but knew it wouldn’t work. First of all, his boss would have his head; realizing that the pictures that would be taken would never hide his true identity. Edward spotted an empty chair in the corner and hurried towards it. At least I can feel invisible back here.

The cold of the metal chair was numbing his butt, but he didn’t dare move from it. There are people from all walks of life here. To the right of him was a group of women who were dressed in black leather corsets with fishnet stockings. Each held a pink leather whip with feathers on the handle. Their black lipstick gave them a look of death. His attention was drawn to the woman standing directly in front of him. She seemed to be out of place among the half-dressed women around her. She was in a suit, a pantsuit. Surely she was not part of the entertainment. That idea went out the window though when they called a woman’s name from the stage and she walked on. With her, she carried a case of what he could only assume was something like massage oils or toys.

Again, Edward looked at his watch. Twelve fifty-two. In just eight minutes all would be revealed to the world. he was once a respectable man. He was a respected member of the community and my church. Well, I was. One decision would now change all that. He couldn’t remember why he agreed to this anymore. It all seemed like a lifetime ago. He was brought back to the day, to the phone call, and to the decision to go against everything he believed in. He was busy making dinner for the kids. Fajitas I think? They were running late for his son’s baseball practice, and he let the machine pick it up. He had his hands full grating cheese when he heard a voice he had not heard in a while. It was Steve, his high school buddy. They had stayed in contact over the years, but Edward had not heard from him in quite some time. Edward ran for the phone.

“Hiya Steve. Sorry, I was making dinner.”

“No problem my friend.”

“I only have a sec, what’s up?”

“Listen, I have stumbled on something that I think could be a great opportunity for you and your family.”

“Ok, and?”

“Well, it is not something I can explain in a couple of minutes, and definitely not something I can discuss on the phone.”

“Listen, Steve, if it is something illegal, I don’t want any part of it.”

“No no, it’s nothing like that.”

“Okay, how about we meet sometime tomorrow evening?”

“Sounds good. I’ll call you tomorrow and we will work out the specifics.”

“Great. Talk to you then.”

That was how it all started. Just that one phone call changed everything

He remembered the first day he met Toni. She was intimidating to say the least, and very persuasive. It made it impossible to say no to her. She was dressed in a black pinstriped suit with jet back hair that flowed well past the small of her back. She almost reminded him of Elvira. The only difference was she wore a crimson red lipstick. She made the opportunity seem like a harmless, easy way to make money and a lot of it.

She told him about the company history and why she started Fantasy Frenzy. She showed him some photos of some typical role play costumes. Then she told him the average monthly pay. It was at that point he couldn’t say no. I thought about what that kind of money could do for my family. The kids won’t have to go without. They could do all the things they wanted to do, and I would not have to tell them no because we didn’t have the money. Before he even had a chance to rethink his decision, the contract was signed. There was no time to second guess a thing.

“You’re up next honey,” the man with the clipboard said as he shook Edward from his gaze.

Panic began to fill Edward as he was being cued to go on stage. His first instinct was to run, but when looking toward the door, he saw Toni standing at the bottom of the stairs and blocking the only way out. Toni motioned for him to stand next to her. Edward got up from the sanctuary of the chair and reluctantly walked towards her.

“It’s just two or three minutes. You can handle it.”

“It’s not doing the show I am worried about. It is what may happen afterward that has me so freaked out.”

“Well then you shouldn’t have signed the contract, right?”

Edward just looked at her dumbfounded. He knew she was right.

Toni would go on first. She would give a short introduction to Fantasy Frenzy and then introduce him. There was no turning back. Everything he had done in his life, whether right or wrong, all came down to this moment. I have done some stupid things in my life, but this has to be the worst by far. This is not who I am or ever wanted to be. Edward wiped the sweat that was beginning to drip from his brow.

Edward began climbing the stairs, each one more becoming more difficult. He walked to the center of the stage behind the closed curtains. This is it. He placed his finger on his cheek and pasted on a smile. He was in position. Toni announced his name, the music began, and the curtains opened. He walked towards the front of the stage and began. Instantly there were flashes of cameras from every direction. There was no way of hiding anymore.