Bernie Sanders Praises China For Eradicating Poverty By Killing All The Poor People

U.S.—Presidential candidate and Senator Bernie Sanders offered words of praise for China's successful reduction of poverty in many parts of the country by killing off all the poor people through government control of the economy.

Sanders pointed out that the country has been very successful in eliminating vast swathes of poverty and also the poor.

"America still has a lot of poor people, and that's because we haven't been aggressive in implementing socialist programs that cause mass starvation," Sanders said, his fingers flopping around like ten tiny wacky inflatable tube men. "Firing squads, death camps, breadlines---all of these are humanitarian tools in the arsenal of the government to shoot poverty in the face, and sometimes also the poor in the face, when it's necessary."

The senator also pointed out that poor people, who often own fewer than three homes, don't contribute much to a socialist economy and "not much is lost" when these single-home-owners are shot or simply starve to death as the government can't even figure out how to get food to everyone, a problem even bad fast-food restaurants like McDonald's solved decades ago.

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