Jon Stewart has no idea what happened in Ferguson, MO, but pretends he does. And according to the Washington Post and much of the media, that’s how Stewart ObliteratedDestroyedBlastedDemolishedShredded Fox News.

Let his trained seals in the media clap. The bottom line to Jon Stewart’s rant is that he believes that waiting for facts is racism.

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Somehow…

Stewart just knows Michael Brown put his hands up.

Stewart just knows racism was behind the shooting of Michael Brown.

Stewart just knows the shooting of Michael Brown was unjustified.

Stewart just knows that Al Sharpton’s symbolic summits in Chicago are enough.

Stewart just knows that America’s racial grifters and media are doing everything they can to stop the bloodshed in Chicago.

Stewart just knows that there’s no more context behind all the facts and figures he cites except, of course, racism.

Even before the Justice Department, Stewart has already gotten to the bottom of what happened in Ferguson, and that gives him the right to step up on a pedestal, wag his widdle finger, and morally preen over those of us who believe in a little thing Americans like to call “waiting for the facts” or “due process” or “justice.”

But because we don’t have Stewart’s magic crystal ball (and he’s not sharing), all The Great Unwashed can do instead is wait for the facts, and in the meantime attempt to point out how dangerous, violent, and destructive things always get when those who don’t wait for the facts (or share their crystal ball) scream racism based only on speculation.

Stewart isn’t attacking Fox News for anything the network did wrong. He’s attacking the network for waiting for the facts and wondering why those who aren’t don’t give a damn about the hundreds of black Americans murdered annually in Chicago.

That’s wrong now.

That’s racist now.

That’s stupid now.

Up is down now.

Right is wrong now.

The police are corrupt; only the police should have guns.

The police are corrupt, but the government they serve is good.

Slavery is freedom.

George Zimmerman is white.

Join the mob or… Jon Stewart’s going to look into the camera, tap his pencil, and make a funny face that ObliteratesDestroysBlastsDemolishesShreds you.

Mobs rioted, looted, destroyed businesses… But Stewart’s indignation is only for those who wait for the facts and condemn those who don’t.

Stewart is down with the struggle and down with those who gin up a frenzied mob that makes victims of only the poor black people in Ferguson Stewart pretends to care about.

I bet if it was Stewart’s mansion being looted or his employer being burnt down, he’d wish people would’ve waited for the facts.

But it wasn’t his community or business that was ObliteratedDestroyedBlastedDemolishedShredded; it was a black community, so it’s okay. Because a burnt-out black community is nothing more than a sacrifice to The Cause.

Jon Stewart is now so puffed up with himself that he sees himself as an all-seeing, all-knowing god — and his first commandment is that the mob is right (as long as it’s not middle-aged Tea Partiers who protest against the government forcing them to buy something and clean up after themselves afterwards).

And here’s a short list of Stewart’s all-seeing, all-knowing media sycophants who also side with the mob:

Washington Post

Daily Show’s Jon Stewart obliterates Fox News coverage

Daily Kos

Jon Stewart blasts Fox News on white privilege over Ferguson

Huffington Post:

Jon Stewart’s Priceless Response To Fox News On Ferguson

E!:

Jon Stewart Outraged Over Fox News’ Ferguson Coverage

WSJ:

Jon Stewart Blasts Fox News for Ferguson Coverage

Mediaite:

Jon Stewart Goes After Fox in Powerful Ferguson Monologue

BuzzFeed:

Jon Stewart Demolishes Fox News On Their Ferguson Coverage

Raw Story:

Jon Stewart shreds Fox News for having ‘no f*cking idea …

Global Grind:

Jon Stewart Trashes Fox News Coverage of Ferguson

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