I hear Kombucha drinks are all the rage in the States, but you can’t find them here in NZ. So when I got a chance to get a free Kombucha “Mushroom” of my own, I jumped at the chance.

The truth is, it isn’t a mushroom at all. It is a symbiotic colony of bacteria and yeasts aka SCOBY aka a zoogleal mat. So it is a living beastie, much like a sourdough starter that you have to love and feed. OK, at least feed. Many people with one seem to call theirs “Scooby the SCOBY,” but I’ve christened mine “Z Mat,” preferrably said in your best ‘Allo ‘Allo fake French accent.

Frugal Man says the SCOBY looks like a sheep placenta. I have no expertise in sheep midwifery, but I do admit the SCOBY itself looks pretty disgusting. Have a peek and see what you think. Fortunately, you don’t drink that part.





For the uninitiated, kombucha tea is slightly tangy and effervescent, reminiscent of a light apple cider that originated in Asia. Kombucha tea supposedly acts as a detoxifier and most sites that mention this delicious beverage warn you not to drink too much of it. I could happily drink it all day, so I have to pace myself.

I used to shell out $3 per single serve bottle for these back when I was a grad student in Austin, TX so it definitely deserves to go in the “Expensive to Buy, Cheap to Make” category. Now I’ve got Z Mat, I make up kombucha by the litre for pennies.

If you aren’t too weirded out by seeing Z Mat, here’s how to make your own tea.

Kombucha Tea Bring 3 litres (about 3 quarts) of water to a boil. Add 1 cup of sugar and stir until the sugar melts. Add 3 tea bags of black tea and immediately remove the water from heat. Allow the sweet tea mixture to cool completely then add your SCOBY along with a bit of the liquid surrounding it. Cover with a cloth and place somewhere warm for 7-10 days. When your SCOBY has produced a “daughter” (another SCOBY!) your tea is ready to drink. Leave for another couple of days for a tangier taste. Refrigerate when it has reached a taste you like.

Give your extra SCOBY to a friend. Or if you bury it in the garden, make sure the neighbors don’t see you a la Rear Window or they will think you are up to no good.

You can use your original SCOBY indefinitely and every time you make Kombucha tea, you’ll have an extra one. Think Tribbles and you’ve got the idea.

Like the idea of a non-dairy probiotic drink, but not fond of Ze Mat? Have a look at Water Kefir instead. Much lower ick factor and still tastes great.

Where can you get a Kombucha SCOBY, you ask? Well, first off, not from me, my pretties. Since I can no longer taste bubbles due to my weird migraine drug side effects, I don’t keep one any more. If you are in New Zealand, try Sella.co.nz for buying one or Ooooby to try and score a freebie from a friendly person near you. In the USA, try this kit on Amazon. Honestly, what CAN’T you get on Amazon, if you live in the continental US?