He then carefully explains to the clueless asshole in the audience how jokes work and how the timing and tone is crucial. And just as ballsy as his insults, he finishes the bit, just to show him what would have been awesome had he not randomly shouted nonsense during the story. Ending it with the greatest lines ever spoken by a comedian in the history of comedy: "You stupid douchenozzle. You truly don't fucking get it, do you? You poor motherfucker. You're gonna miss everything cool and die angry."

1 Bill Burr Versus All of Philadelphia

I'm not going to quote a single thing Bill Burr says in this video because nothing I could say would do it justice. Besides, it's not about what he's saying. He was in a comedy concert called Opie and Anthony's Traveling Virus in Philadelphia. After watching the two comedians before him get booed into the ground, he was already pissed off. So when he started his act to the same booing, he just dropped everything and tore into the audience. For his entire 11-minute set. The louder they booed, the more he ranted, counting off the minutes as he went. And every time they thought he was going to wrap it up and walk off the stage, he'd stop and say, "I have seven minutes left, and I'm doing all goddamn seven of them. Fuck you."

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He used comedy like a fucking weapon, and he made sure that none of them got any sort of enjoyment out of it. If they started to clap, he'd switch to making fun of their sports teams. If they got used to that, he'd insult their mothers. Then their city. Then their intelligence. He called them racists. And every minute, he called out how much time he had left, until the very end, when he said, "That's my time. You guys ... you guys were here, man." Then he hung up the mic and left to the loudest cheers of the night.

For more Cheese, check out 5 Wacky Internet Pranks That Can Get You Jail Time and 5 Terrible Things You Can't Stop Your Children From Doing.

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