Hello. I run a popular and successful website, and everywhere I go I'm feted like a baseball-writing deity. It's hard to even walk down the street without being stopped and praised. Would you like this life? You cannot have this life. You can come close, though. McCovey Chronicles is hiring a social monkey.

What is a social monkey? He or she would be responsible for:

1.

Posting about 3-7 short, short articles per day on quirky, stupid, interesting stuff. You know what one of the leading stories is on the entire SB Nation network today? This short thingamadoodle on Madison Bumgarner. It's actually on the longer side for the typical post. This FanShot -- a headline, embedded tweet, and two sentences -- is more of the typical idea.

These won't live at the top of the site or in the cover, usually. There will be a group semi-permanently placed below the cover that'll look like this:

The goal is to make people clickclickclick from Facebook and other social-type places.

2.

I'm pretty good about posting my own stories to Facebook. Less good about posting Bryan's or groug's. Also, it's a good #brand-building exercise to engage Facebook on some level without being a link feed. Something like "Francisco Liriano is off the market now. Was he one of your offseason fantasies?" During the games, it would be great to have someone posting links to the MLB.com videos as they come up, that sort of thing. This is less of a priority than the first part, but still something that would help.

This job pays, too! Not much -- just $100 per month -- but it's designed for someone screwing around with Facebook or the general Internet all day at work. When Hunter Pence has one of them Instagram things ... when there's a story about Madison Bumgarner roping a bull statue because he's sad ... when there's something with Bruce Bochy standing in front of a gingerbread house ... you'll be there.

What I'd love for you to do if you're interested is pick a day between now and next Wednesday -- one typical weekday -- and collect the things you would include in this shortform section during that day. Write up a couple of mock examples, remembering how simple that Pablo/Red Sox thing was. Then email it to mccoveychronicles@gmail.com. After that, I will procrastinate going through those emails, driving everyone nuts, including myself.

Good luck, social-monkey hopefuls!