i'll never forget back in 1st grade around V-day, there was a dude i had an OMG HUUUGE crush on. another girl (crystal) in the class told him and a bunch of people teased me relentlessly over it, because i was the "new kid" that year. to get back at her, i wrote on that big old lined paper a note that said, "dear nick, i love you. can we get married? love, crystal." and put it in his mailbox in the classroom. of course, i sat right next to the mailboxes and just slipped it in.

he pulled the note out of his box at the end of the day and showed the teacher. she immediately called me up and asked me if i wrote it. of course, i said "no," but she said, "i know you wrote it, because crystal can't spell 'married.' " i started crying because i was caught, and poor nick just looked totally flummoxed and embarrassed and suddenly decided he didn't care. i was mortified, though, got in huge trouble for lying right in front of the entire class, and begged mom not to make me go back (didn't work).