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Attendees at a government-led women’s leadership conference say the day was marred by the distribution of a booklet with 80-year-old advice recommending people smile more, never complain and conquer their problems through prayer.

The conference gathered over 350 women leaders in Newfoundland and Labrador as the government discussed the details and mandate of its updated status-of-women office.

But reading material taken from Dale Carnegie’s 1936 “How to Win Friends and Influence People,” handed out in a networking session, drew ire from those who found its message tone-deaf and condescending.

The “Golden Book” included tips like “don’t criticize, condemn or complain,” advising people to smile more and relax at home to adjust their appearance.

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The text was written as a general, non-gendered booklet of advice, but many found it out of place at the event.

Shannon Lewis-Simpson, who teaches at Memorial University, said she felt infantilized and taken aback by the session.

She found some of the messages in the “Golden Book” lacked a nuanced, contemporary understanding of gender and mental health, and said she was perplexed why the material made it to attendees’ tables.

“I wonder, was it vetted, and if it wasn’t vetted then it should have been,” Lewis-Simpson said.

“I think that the distraction that thing caused was counterproductive to what could have been a really positive day.” Tweet This

Many pointed out on Twitter that a male speaker leading the session added to the patronizing elements, considering the audience of accomplished women.

Lewis-Simpson said the speaker did his job well for what he had been booked to do, but the optics left a lot to be desired at an event billed around empowering women.

“It was particularly egregious, it was particularly, ‘You will sit down and listen to me,”‘ she said.

“The tone of it was just not appropriate for the day. It shut down networking rather than built it up.” Tweet This

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The networking talk was only one aspect of the day’s schedule — it also featured a panel of women, remarks from the premier and a keynote from oil and gas executive Lorraine Mitchelmore.

Premier Dwight Ball opened the day announcing the status-of-women office’s focus on violence prevention, motivating women into taking leadership roles and stronger gender analysis of government work.

But the Dale Carnegie incident compounded people’s surprise that there wasn’t much time scheduled for feedback or discussion with the impressive roster of women in attendance.

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Amanda Bittner, a politics professor at Memorial, said she saw the event and its strong attendance as positive for progress on women’s issues in the province, as well as the government creating a cabinet position specifically focused on women’s issues.

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But she said organizational missteps served to alienate and upset guests who expected more vigorous and inclusive discussion of the political issues raised.

“A lot of the folks who were there felt disrespected because it was like, ‘Well, I took off five hours to be talked at,” Bittner said.

“You don’t usually get a chance to have 400 really bright, smart, experienced and diverse people in a room together. That’s a huge opportunity that was missed in the end because there was not really a lot of back and forth dialogue.” Tweet This

Mary Shortall, president of the Newfoundland and Labrador Federation of Labour, said she raised her disappointments with the minister, but stressed she was still impressed with the gathering of women and hopes the comments were taken with their constructive intent in mind.

“I think women know that, inherently, that we accomplish much more when we work together,” Shortall said.

A statement from the office of Carol Anne Haley, minister for the status of women, said the event was the first in a series of workshops and sessions, and acknowledged the feedback.

“We will be incorporating all feedback, both positive and negative, on yesterday’s conference and incorporating it into all future events,” the statement read. Tweet This

Bittner said it was unfortunate that the event was a rocky start for the minister who seems to have good intentions in the portfolio, but the poorly received elements of the conference are one example of how government can consider its mandate to do more sensitive gender analysis of its work.

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“In a way, this event and the way that it kind of played out is kind of a demonstration of the importance of gender-based analysis from the start and not just at the end,” she said.