It’s a natural impulse for a man to worry about his circumstances, how can we not? After all mother nature did evolve us to be the providers, and the protectors of the family unit. We need to be strong, we need to be mentally stable, we need to provide what is expected of us, it’s natural to worry about things going wrong that have a negative effect on your ability to provide. The thing is, we worry too much, especially in modern society, there is too much stress about things which we cannot control or change. I look around me, and everywhere I see people worrying about things they have zero control over, yet they aren’t at all bothered by things that they should legitimately worry about and that they can and should change. People are almost afraid of facing the problems and challenge in their life that they can face, and are far more happy to start worrying about things that they cannot control, since if it’s out of their control they think that they aren’t responsible for thing going to shit. I too am guilty of this, especially this past week, I started to worry about things that I have absolutely no control over, and I greatly procrastinated on things which I can changes and think that I need to do to better myself and my life. I’ve grown aware of this fact, and so that is one of the reasons I’m writing this down, partly for myself that I don’t forget, and partly to share this thought with other man who strive to be the best man they can be.

So what are the things you need to worry about?

In short, there are two criteria that need to be fulfilled for you to be justified in worrying about something.

-Does that thing has an effect on your state of being?

By state of being I mean does it effect your emotional state, your spiritual state, does it bother you in any way, does it have a real effect on your future.



-Can you do anything about this problem?

Once you’ve identified the thing that you worry about as a true problem, and not just an irrational emotional reaction to your surroundings, you have to ask yourself is there anything that you can realistically do, to effect this problem positively.

For example, some guys opinion on your life choices is not your problem, it doesn’t effect your state of being in any way, it might be emotionally hard for you to accept his opinion, especially if it’s a person close to you, but in the end that opinion cannot effect your life in any way. There isn’t a real problem there, there isn’t anything that represents an obstacle in your way of growing stronger and better as a man. On the other hand, if you have a real problem, like for example if your computer died and you need to have it fixed. What can you o about it? Most you can do, is being it to a shop to be repaired, any worrying after that point on whether or not your computer will be fixed is pointless, you have no power over what happens next, and any additional worrying about this problem will only bring you pain and stress and will present itself as an additional obstacle in your life. Life is too short to be wasted on worrying about things that you cannot control, or things that don’t deserve your time and energy.

There is also the problem of people trying to create non-existing problems to help them cope with real problem they have. I see this all the time, people whose lives are obviously going to shit, worrying about whether the shirt that they are wearing looks good on them. They fail to realize that their problem are much bigger then that shirt, or the opinion of their partner, or the fact that their hair is messy, they worry about little things in hopes that the big problem, the one that looms over them threat hing to destroy them will go away. Maybe you are one of these people, and if you are I can tell you things are ugly, and they aren’t getting better if you don’t make them better. Start working on yourself, on the physical, spiritual and emotional level, work on developing a positive mindset, work on discovering your masculinity, focus on the real problem you have and only on the ones that you can solve and the ones who’s solving leads to you becoming a better version of yourself, that is all you can do in life. No amount of worrying about anything will help you in any way, it can only hinder your progress, stop worrying about stupid things, focus on the right problem, solved them and evolve.

Opinions of other people rarely matter, and if they do most of the time it’s not about trying to change their opinion, but rather it’s about bringing yourself to the point where that opinion stops mattering. And for those brethren who already know all of this and are simply in a low point in their life, where no matter what they do they still feel stressed and worried. Do what I did, take day off, go far away from everything, camp out alone for a night, or if you can’t do that, simply spend a day alone out in a park, meditate for day, do a one-day fast, and make a list of things which fulfill the above mentioned criteria. I wrote a couple of simple meditative visualizations which may help, you can find them here, or listen to one of these guided meditations. Kill the worry and restart your fight brothers.

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