The Champions League final happens this Saturday as L*verpool take on Real Madrid in a final that Manchester City probably should have been in but Mo Salah or something.

It kicks off at 7.45pm, but if you can't stand the thought of the build-up, hype and continual adverts from sleeve sponsors and the like, there are alternatives.

If you're a City fan and want to profit from the misery of dejected Scousers, 3-0 to Real Madrid is available at around 25/1, and Ronaldo is 3/1 to score two or more goals.

The good news for match avoiders is that it's going to be really sunny this weekend - and there are loads of things to do in Manchester when it's hot .

But if you're looking for something to turn your hand to for a couple of hours that isn't watching the match, how about giving these a try..?

Go back to bed

Most healthy adults need between seven to nine hours sleep a night, which I don't think I've had in around a decade. So you could have an early night or treat yourself to a disco nap before you head out to one of the many events going on in Manchester this weekend .

Play FIFA 18 and put things right

Like this YouTube legend. Jesus bags a hat-trick as City demolish Real 5-1. You need to put your difficulty levels up, soft lad.

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Build a pizza oven in your garden

My neighbour Phil has just built one. It took him about two years. Or you could buy one from Aldi.

Watch Britain at Low Tide on More4

Coming straight after Great Canal Journeys in a classic WHAM BAM one-two of pedestrian TV designed to make you feel the opposite of tense or stressed out by football, Tori Herridge and Alex Langlands investigate Merseyside's coastal archaeology rather than their footballing heritage.

Stick with me.

They explore 'a beach full of rubble from the Second World War' and discover evidence of people and animals dating back for 7,000 years. Cue gags about how Scousers haven't progressed much since then.

No?

They also discover a story from Liverpool that echoes the plot of classic Ealing comedy Whisky Galore!

OH COME ON.

Go and watch Ed Sheeran at the Etihad

(Image: PA)

I know. Things are never that bad. But if you take leave of your senses or want to surround yourself with people who don't like spicy food, think Strongbow Dark Fruits is exotic and consider Michael McIntyre edgy, there are tickets here .

The Neighbourhood Weekender might be more your thing though.

Or you could just turn the telly over. Your call.