After years of beating around the bush and not answering the question that everyone asks of me when I tell them about my boyfriend, I think it’s time to let the world know exactly what being in long distance relationship feels like.

1. Long distance feels like Taylor Swift writing a song about missing Harry Styles when he’s in London. “Come back, be here.”

2. Long distance feels like spending days trying to fill up your time, waiting until you see each other again.

3. Long distance feels like wanting to call, but not picking up the phone because you don’t know what to expect when he answers.

4. Long distance feels like answering the call, but stumbling over words as they travel over each mile separating you.

5. Long distance feels like a cold hand, a jealous eye, a nervous stomach.

6. Long distance feels like Christmas every time he’s standing at your front door.

7. Long distance feels confining. You can’t go out tonight. You aren’t suppose to talk to her. You shouldn’t be there without him.

8. Long distance feels like the absence of reality. He’s never there, but he’s all yours.

9. Long distance feels like an easy out, a refusal to live in the present.

10. Long distance feels like your friends saying, “Are you still with that guy from (Insert Far Far Away City here)?”

11. Long distance feels so sure. If he wasn’t the one, why would you bother?

12. Long distance feels like forgotten birthdays and unread text messages.

13. Long distance feels like he’s the only one in the world you love.

14. Long distance feels like he’s not listening.

15. Long distance feels like hearing, “I didn’t know you had a boyfriend,” one thousand times.

16. Long distance feels like no one in your city could possibly take his place.

17. Long distance feels like the most effort you can put into having the one thing you want the most.

18. Long distance feels like you can’t get there quickly enough.

19. Long distance feels like it’s been three years apart and two weeks together.

20. Long distance feels quiet on a Friday night.

21. Long distance feels bitter.

22. Long distance feels like every second spent together is an hour in a wonderland. There is no world outside of this room.

23. Long distance feels like questioning if his friends know your name.

24. Long distance feels like reminding people you’re not available, because they didn’t see the “in a relationship” signs that are normally flashing when your significant other is permanently around.

25. Long distance feels heavy. He isn’t here when you need him most.

26. Long distance feels short when you’re together and you can’t stop laughing.

27. Long distance feels like crying to an emotionally-charged Damien Rice song when your boyfriend makes you mad, but never saying anything because it won’t matter in a few weeks when you finally get to see him.

28. Long distance feels like after being away for months, he’s sitting right next to you and nothing has changed.

29. Long distance feels crazy.

30. Long distance feels worth it.