It must be tough to be one of the Don Wildmon-type Christians. The Muslims are trying to convert you to their God, who’s actually the same God. The Atheists keep telling you that you are descended from monkeys. And you’re afraid that you will become gay if a homosexual moves into your neighborhood.

That’s probably why you go to the OneNewsNow Web site to get your news. Because you know it’ll give you the Christian news. So I can just imagine your shock yesterday morning when you went to the site and discovered that a Homosexual had run a wind-aided 9.68 seconds sprint to make the Olympics.

Of course, I’m sure that’s got nothing on sprinter Tyson Gay waking up to discover that his spot on the Olympic team was being instead taken by some guy named Tyson Homosexual. And all because some homophobe religious bigots set the auto-replace function to change all uses of “gay” with “homosexual.”

Now the story has been fixed, and Tyson Gay is back on the U.S. Olympic team. But I can’t wait until the Olympics and “Homosexual wins U.S. Gold.” – John Royal