I believe the devil exists, not as an entity or a creature, but as a force of nature. I have encountered it in many occasions with its lies and seductions. Sometimes I won, but most of the time I lost. What exactly is devil anyway? There are different beliefs from different races, cultures and religions. I will just share you my thoughts.

Did you ever encounter something like when you are trying to do a good thing, bad things starting to happen and made you wonder “Why bother?”. Like the old saying “No good deed goes unpunished.” That’s, my friend, is the devil at work. Not the horned creature with an O.D. of sulphur, but the forces of darkness trying to suppress the light.

I remembered one time I decided to quit drinking. And suddenly, many opportunities to drink and party coming up almost everyday. I believe it was the work of the devil trying to balance out the chances of good deeds with the prospect of bad ones.

One of the biggest encounter with the devil force was when I started studying Buddhism, and meditating everyday. There was this monk from Myanmar whose translations of Buddha’s teaching are very clear and meaningful to me. I listened to the recording of his sermons everyday. I meditated everyday. And something happened. I was betrayed by someone I trusted with my life. I met my long lost friend who like to drink. And before you know it I was falling off from my practice of meditation and started drinking a couple of drinks weekly. Eventually, it led to my year of binge drinking.

It sounds like I am just blaming my weakness to something intangible like devil and refusing to take responsibilities for my actions. Well, I am not. Whatever the hell I did, I am responsible. But what I am trying to say here is whenever you are starting over or changing your life for good, please watch out for the devil. If you are aware and on your guard, you have more chances to succeed.

Now I am starting over my life. I’ve been trying to improve my life in small little ways everyday. I am starting to see the shuffle in the shadows. Several occasions are presenting themselves to throw me off the wagon. But, I am ready this time. I won’t be easily beaten without a fight.

You should not, too.