let me tell you a story about janet varney

last night at eccc, i had the great privilege of meeting janet twice: once at her panel and the second time at her signing afterward

during the questions from the audience section of her panel, i used my time at the mic to tell her how much korra as a character with ptsd means to me personally and how watching her struggle but ultimately triumph in her time of great internal darkness has helped me heal in my own path to recovery.

i had a very difficult time getting those words out without breaking down completely, and i did have to take a second to collect myself while i tried to keep from crying too much, but janet was incredibly gentle and kind when i had to stop and apologize. she just said, “it’s okay, take your time. there’s no rush.” everyone else in the audience was patient and respectful, which was a huge relief.

when i finished talking about my experience and finally asked janet my question (how did she connect with korra’s ptsd storyline), she thanked me for telling her about how that aspect of korra’s character has helped me, and she said i was very brave to talk about it. everyone in the panel room applauded and cheered after that, which was amazing and made me cry even harder. talking about my ptsd in a room full of strangers was scary but i really wanted to tell janet what it meant to me to see myself represented in korra.

anyway, i got through my first question without totally dissolving, and janet’s answer honestly surprised and humbled me: she said she connected to korra’s ptsd because she’s had ptsd too, so she understood a lot of what korra was going through. i thought that was really amazing of her to say; what an astounding show of honesty and trust.



i also talked to her about how seeing korrasami become canon was incredibly fulfilling for so many reasons, most of all because i knew my little sister got to see that and other young queer kids like her all over the world were able to see themselves represented in those characters. i asked her how she felt about the impact of korrasami overall.

janet smiled really big at that and said she felt so humbled by the fact that she had been part of something as important as korrasami. she said she’d never dreamt it would happen but she was so glad it did because “love is love, and one day i hope kids will watch that and ask ‘what was the big deal?’ because they’ll know by then it doesn’t matter who someone loves as long as they love each other.” her answer truly touched me.

when my time at the mic was finished, janet thanked me again for talking openly about my experience, and the audience cheered and clapped once more. i made towards my seat, and i was just about to walk past janet when she said, “hey, come here,” and opened her arms to pull me into a hug. i gratefully (if tearfully) accepted and whispered “thank you” to her after i pulled away, to which she gave me a smiling nod and encouraging squeeze of my shoulder.

later, when i came up to her signing booth, she immediately smiled very warmly and said, “hi honey,” and then, "shayna, right?” i was so flattered and impressed she had remembered my name!

she looked me right in the eye and said softly, “thank you again for speaking up about your experience earlier. i really appreciated you sharing that with me and i’m so glad korra has helped you. i know that other people in the room were thinking that so i’m happy you spoke about it. if you need to talk anytime, just ask. keep in touch, okay? find me on twitter. i’d love to talk more with you.” then she took a picture with me (she loved my momo ears) and i thanked her again and again. before i left, she gave me another tight, enveloping hug.

afterward, when i looked down at the korrasami fanart she had signed for me, i saw that she had written, “you inspire me.” and at that moment, i was the happiest i had been for a very long time.



(fanart can be found by grace allison here!)