As many of you know, I came out on Facebook about a month ago.

“Alright. It’s time to do a thing. I’m sorry to all of you for not telling you in person, but please understand that this is a very nerve-wracking experience and it’s a lot easier to do it when I’m hidden behind a computer screen.

We’re going to have a talk about sexual orientation. Specifically, my sexual orientation. I am attracted to people regardless of their gender. This means that I could be attracted to someone who identifies as male or female, or any other gender. I have decided not to define my sexual orientation by any specific label and I would appreciate it if you would respect that decision.

If you have any questions or would like to know more, I am open to talk about it. I just ask that you keep it respectful.

Huzzah. :)”

In hindsight, I should have left off the ‘huzzah.’

Since coming out, I’ve had a lot of people with questions and comments. I wanted to take today to address some of these.

I have had several people who have informed me of the sexual orientation label which I fall under. Whilst I appreciate the kind intent behind these words… Stop. Please. No, I am not pansexual. Or bisexual. Or questioning. Or just confused. Trust me.

I have known my sexual orientation for years and, before that, I spent obscene amounts of time researching label after label to try and find one that fits me. None of them do. For a long time I felt so lost because of it. I wanted to fit in somewhere, but sometimes there just isn’t a way to describe something in all of its totality. I finally realized that.

I am aware that this can be confusing to many of you, because I felt just as confused.

In all honesty, I’m not entirely certain why I don’t feel comfortable identifying under any label. Part of it, I think, is that labels scare me. For some people, it’s freeing to be able to identify under a label. It gives them a place. But for me, it feels like putting myself in a box, like I’m trapped. It’s claustrophobic. My sexual orientation is so multi-dimensional and, while I’m very comfortable with where I am right now, I still have a lot to learn and explore.

I’m not ready to label myself quite yet. Maybe someday I will be. Maybe not.

And that’s okay.