THE Trump-Kim meeting mainly focused on what utter dicks the people they govern are.

Following opening pleasantries about the hotel’s generous buffet breakfast, Donald Trump expressed frustration that he could just not kill everyone who pissed him off like Kim does.

Trump said: “They are so many stupid bastards in my country. I want to stop them ever voting again.”

Kim agreed that not having elections “makes life much easier” adding that the key to keeping them quiet is acute fear mixed with rabid nationalism to distract the masses from massive wealth inequality.

Trump replied: “Yeah I pretty much do that already. I even had these baseball caps done up that said ‘America Best’ or something. I’ll send you one, there’s a box of them under my desk.

“Have you actually ever fed anyone to a bear? Sharks? I want to get some jackals.”

He added: “Come and see my car. It’s got scented arm rests.”