Just in case a Brexit vote today marks the beginning of the end of the euro-myth, we celebrate the most inventive red herrings of all and judge just how truthful they were

If Britain votes Brexit today, it will not only be the end of 40 years of EU membership. It could also mark the beginning of the end of that prolific media staple, a Brussels hardy perennial that has coloured the way Britons view Europe - the euro-myth.

Heard the one about the EU banning bagpipes? Bendy cucumbers? Children blowing up balloons? Or the one about it renaming yoghurt “fermented milk pudding”? What about the madness of the EU’s directives on eggs which, if you believe the various rumours, have to be stamped with the home address of the farmer, must not be sold by the dozen and can no longer be called “eggs”.

Inventing Euro myths has been something of a sport for the British press for nearly 30 years. The EU’s Euromyths website, which offers officials in Brussels a chance to rebut media accusations of meddling, features about 650 reports.

Many of these contain a kernel of truth, perhaps a line in a draft proposal or a footnote in a directive that has been taken out of context and blown out of proportion. Some are completely fabricated. Most support the narrative that Brussels is nothing but a bunch of meddling, red-tape-loving, humourless pedants who are out to ban, or at least rename, our fun. Here are 10 of the best Euro myths.

Bombay mix

In 2006, the Sun reported that “nutty” EU officials wanted to rename Bombay mix Mumbai mix, “to make the snack politically correct”.

This story is completely fictional. The Telegraph’s then Brussels correspondent, David Rennie, managed to find the source of the story, which was a small regional news agency in England. The editor there told him the story “came from a mate at the Home Office, who had heard it being talked about” and when challenged said: “Look, this is just meant to be funny for the tabloids.”

Grains of truth (out of five): 0



Facebook Twitter Pinterest Sun article on Bombay mix.

Banning prawn cocktail crisps

This is a subject that has exercised Boris Johnson for about 15 years. In 2002 he wrote that some of his “most joyous hours” had been spent composing “foam-flecked hymns of hate to the latest Euro-infamy”, the first on the list: the ban on prawn cocktail crisps.

Except that the EU never banned the crisps. The EU contends that this palaver was the result of an error by the UK government, which failed to include prawn cocktail when asked to send a list of flavourings and sweeteners in current use to the EU, which was drafting a harmonised EU-wide list. When the mistake was spotted, the information was provided by the UK government and the list was amended.

But this hasn’t stopped Johnson from getting angry about it. As recently as March, the former London mayor cited the “great war against the British prawn cocktail flavour crisp” as part of his evidence of Brussels-gone-mad and a reason he was campaigning to leave.

Grains of truth: 1



26,911 words on cabbage legislation

“The Lord’s Prayer is 66 words long. The Ten Commandments: 79 words. The Gettysburg address: 272 words. EU regulations on the sale of cabbage? 26,911 words.”

This is a Euro myth for a social media age. The kind of catchy summary of everything that’s wrong with the EU in 140 characters (well, just over). It’s a line that the Daily Mail’s Rachel Johnson – Boris’s sister, as chance would have it – wrote in March.

Only, it’s not right. The “cabbage memo”, as it is known, is of questionable origin and can be found in exactly the same form mocking US government regulations on the sale of cabbage.



For those who are interested, EU regulations laying down the common quality standards for cabbages can be found here. The section on cabbages runs to about 1,800 words.

Grains of truth: 0



Barmaids’ boobs

There was outrage in 2005 at suggestions that the EU was about to stick red tape all over the exposed busts of British barmaids.

“Po-faced penpushers have deemed it a HEALTH HAZARD for bar girls to show too much cleavage,” wailed the Sun in an article headlined “Hands off our barmaids’ boobs”, which contended that “in a daft directive … Brussels bureaucrats have ordered a cover-up”.

There was indeed a directive put forward by the EU which argued employers should be responsible for ensuring any staff who worked outdoors did not suffer over-exposure to the sun in an effort to reduce skin cancer. The directive suggested this might involve providing employees with suncream or allowing them to wear protective clothing. Barmaids, busty or otherwise, were not mentioned in the document, which ended up dropping the line about sun damage, causing the Sun to tell readers to “lift your jugs to the Sun” for saving “Britain’s busty barmaids”.



Grains of truth: 2

Curved bananas to be banned

In September 1994, the Sun, Daily Mirror, Daily Mail and Daily Express all reported that “curved bananas have been banned by Brussels bureaucrats”.

The thought of curved bananas being plucked from the hands of hungry British toddlers by EU officials clearly struck home, because it is one that has refused to die. The story ran again in the Sun in 1998 under the headline “Bananas must not be excessively curved” and the Telegraph crowed in 2008: “Bent banana and curved cucumber rules dropped.”

Like many myths, this one has a grain of truth to it, namely a line in the commission regulation (EC) 2257/94, which dictates that all bananas must be free from “abnormal curvature”. But curved bananas are not and never have been banned: bananas of the lower classes are permitted “defects of shape”.

Grains of truth: 2



Facebook Twitter Pinterest Another Daily Express bendy banana story.

The Euro condom

Rumours that the EU would introduce regulations for the sizing of condoms, leading to a one-size-fits-all “euro condom” caused a great dealing of harrumphing in the 90s, as people felt that Brussels’ intervention into their sex lives was a bridge too far.

Except the condom-by-Brussels never materialised. While standards of condom size were introduced across Europe, these were the responsibility of the European Committee on Standardisation, which is not an EU body.

Grains of truth: 1



Brussels stole the cookie from the cookie jar

In January, the Mail on Sunday published a story claiming that the EU was set to eliminate “the great British biscuit” because of high levels of trans fat. It followed a report published last December by the European commission, which suggested a legal EU-wide limit on trans fats to improve public health.

The Mail’s article suggested that biscuits were particularly under threat from this directive and illustrated the piece with a picture of custard creams. It trumpeted the intervention of the Tory MP Jacob Rees-Mogg, who pledged to “defend British eating habits” against “Brussels meddling”.

The problem is that even if an EU directive on trans fats were approved, such a limit would be unlikely to have much impact on the UK retail and manufacturing market, which has already committed to reducing, or banning, the use of trans fats in products. In fact an international study didn’t find any high trans-fat products for sale in major UK supermarkets.

Custard creams are particularly safe from “Brussels meddling”. The company that makes them, United Biscuits, committed to eradicating trans fats from its products in 2006.

Grains of truth: 1



The criminalisation of the inch

A long-simmering concern is that EU is forcing Britain to get rid of its pints, acres, inches, feet and pounds, in favour of metric measurements.

In 2001 the Daily Telegraph ran a story suggesting that even the Queen was being forced to “obey Europe”, saying that she had been warned that the Sandringham sawmill on her Norfolk estate must stop selling oak in feet and inches, “which is a criminal offence under EC metrication laws”.

In reality, the UK agreed to gradually adopt a metric system in 1965 and created the Metrication Board to coordinate the process in 1969. However, it is true that joining the EEC in 1973 obliged the UK to stick to metrication and there are occasional noises from EU commissioners that Britain has taken almost half a century to go metric and should maybe get a move on.

For those concerned, the Queen was not prosecuted for selling wood by the foot, firstly because the estate complied with the directive to go metric and secondly because selling in imperial measurements is not a criminal offence.

Grains of truth: 2



Banning double-decker buses

“New bus safety rules could ban [double-decker buses] from Britain’s streets altogether,” fumed the Daily Telegraph in 1998. “The British symbol, recognised worldwide, is threatened because double-decker buses are presumed less safe and accessible to disabled passengers than single-deck buses.”

The European commission has made moves towards standardising bus design for safety and accessibility purposes, and one-deck buses fitted with seat belts are recommended as safer than the double-decker variety. However, the EU has made it clear it wants to respect the individual transport needs of its member states. Not only are double-decker buses not banned by regulations, but they get their own section in EU regulation about how to make them safe.

Grains of truth: 2



Fish to be called by their Latin names

Even the humble fish and chip shop isn’t safe from EU madness, according to the Daily Mail and the Sun, which reported in 2001 that the EU was going to force takeaways, restaurants, fishmongers and supermarkets to call fish by their Latin names, meaning “baffled Brits will have to ask for hippoglossus hippoglossus instead of plain halibut”.

The European commission did propose that fish products carry clearer labelling, including the exact name of the fish, how it was produced and where it was caught, but there is no need to crack open the Latin dictionary while trying to get a takeaway.

Grains of truth: 1

