Over the last several weeks, Decider polled over 40 LGBTQ entertainment professionals — writers, directors, showrunners, actors, journalists — and asked them to list their picks for the most important LGBTQ TV characters of all-time. We let “important” be defined in the eye of the beholder; these characters all meant something to us in our own personal ways. Check out the complete list of the Top 50 Most Important LGBTQ TV Characters of All-Time here; what follows is one of our essays on the top 10 characters on our list, in recognition of their particularly significant place in LGBTQ entertainment.

Joss Whedon‘s Buffy The Vampire Slayer grew a fervent fandom by centering its monster-rich shenanigans on an ass-kicking heroine and her crew of charismatic sidekicks. Over the course of seven seasons, the quipping slayer’s best gal pal Willow Rosenberg (Alyson Hannigan) became a fan favorite and a meaningful source of queer representation as she engaged in meaningful romances with male and female lovers, and proved too complex to pin down with tired–and often denigrating–stereotypes.

A whip-smart bookworm with a never-say-die attitude, Willow was a dependable Scooby from the start, often uncovering a crucial clue for defeating this week’s ghastly ghoul or dastardly demon just in the nick of time. As a devoted friend, she was always there for Buffy whether the slayer battled vampires or struggled with her love for Angel. But it wasn’t until Willow got a love interest of her own in season two that this winsome wallflower really began to bloom. Through the love and encouragement of rocker/werewolf Oz (Seth Green), Willow’s confidence blossomed. Yet her greatest growth came in her college years, where she not only explored her interest in witchcraft, but also in the shy spell-caster Tara (Amber Benson).

Breaking major ground for a prime time series, Buffy The Vampire Slayer brewed the romance between Willow and Tara matter-of-factly and sincerely, rather than playing it as scandalous girl-on-girl action to bolster Sweeps Week ratings. Similarly, Willow’s realization that she was interested in Tara evolved slowly, as did her coming out to her friends. When she did, the Scoobies reacted with surprise, but never shock or repulsion. Which really, in a series where teen girls transform into rats, demons spur people to dance to death, and vampires are dying to bed Buffy, lesbians are far from shocking. Still, the easy acceptance of this same-sex romance sang out to a world of queer kids, saying they are seen and accepted.

During a recent reunion interview with EW, Benson said of her onscreen relationship with Hannigan, “I think there were a lot of young people who felt very isolated, and to see two characters on a television show be accepted by a group of peers, changed the game. They already loved Willow but then to see that Willow became even more somebody that they could identify with, it made it okay for them to be who they were.”

Through a shared love of magic, Tara and Willow came together. Fittingly, scenes where the pair performed spells often had sexual overtones. The most explicit of these came in the musical ep, “Once More With Feeling,” where Tara levitates above their bed, Willow kissing her way down her body, until she’s out of frame. Then the floating witch sings, “You make me complete,” though the phrasing plays more cheekily, “You make me com…plete.”

Of course, the couple also faced hard times, like Tara’s assault at the hands of Glory, and Willow’s addiction to dark magic, which pried them apart for a stretch of season six. But just after their joyful reunion, Tara’s untimely death spurred a deeply dark turn in Willow’s arc.

Fueled by grief, the once chipper redhead wreaked gruesome vengeance on Tara’s killer. Turning back to black magic, Willow hunted her prey, tortured then infamously flayed him with the swish of a witchy wrist. It wasn’t just horrific; it was heartbreaking because this was no random fiend. This was our Willow, so wounded and wrathful that she’d become the big bad hell-bent on ending the world. Naturally, the Scoobies saved the day and their friend, pulled her back from the brink. But part of what makes Willow one of the best gay characters that television has ever seen is that she was allowed such complexity and growth over the course of the show.

We saw her go from quirky sidekick to a powerful heroine in her own right, then fall to vicious villain, and be redeemed. Through it all, she blew up suffocating gay stereotypes. In college, she experimented with a girl. But she wasn’t kissing Tara for male attention, male gaze, or a juicy plot twist. She was earnestly in love. Over the course of three seasons, her relationship with Tara proved to be the most stable on the show, fostered by a deep appreciation for each other. Sure, their bond was challenged because it–just like straight relationships–was subject to change and conflict. Through Willow and Tara, Whedon demystified same-sex couples to a mainstream audience without making this simple lesson in humanity feel like an overeager afterschool special. Even as a villain, Willow avoided stereotype pitfalls. Buffy The Vampire Slayer didn’t portray her as broken or wicked because she was gay, but because she was in pain, and in a pain that audiences could understand instead of judge.

For nearly 20 years, fans have debated exactly how Willow Rosenberg fits into the LGBTQA+ landscape. During the show’s initial run, she was popularly defined as a lesbian. However, that labeling discounts the seasons she spent loving Oz, and the conflict she faced when her first love returned and she was already with Tara. Since the show’s conclusion, Willow has been embraced by bisexuals as one of our camp. But sexuality is fluid, and Willow identified on the show as “a little bit gay.” So perhaps the particulars don’t matter much. She was queer. She was powerful, relatable, smart, and caring. And best of all, she was ours.

Kristy Puchko is a New York-based entertainment writer whose work has been published on Vanity Fair, IndieWire, Nerdist, and Pajiba. She can be found on Twitter: @KristyPuchko.

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