OK chaps, it’s time to make friends with your razors again – the beards have gotta go.

Thanks to the celeb set, including the likes of Jamie Dornan, Leonardo DiCaprio and David Beckham, full facial hair (the longer, the better) has been “A Thing” for far too long, moving beyond the hipsters to proper mainstream.

Some days, you can barely walk down a street without running into a beard.

Forget sports cars, beards are the new and very visible indicator of machismo – even Jeremy Clarkson grew one last year after the kerfuffle in Argentina.

But enough is enough and now experts are warning they’re breeding grounds for bacteria and can even spread bugs.

So, if you’re wondering whether to have a close shave in time for spring, read on…

They’re germ traps

According to consultant trichologist Carol Walker from the Birmingham Trichology Centre, coarse facial hair traps germs and food, with things like dairy products going rancid.

Men with beards also tend to touch them a lot, transferring dirt and grease from their hands to their mouths – and all this gets spread when they kiss, Walker told the Mail Online.

They’re a joke

Yes, we’re talking Roald Dahl’s Mr Twit, whose beard was full of leftovers like cornflakes, sardines and stilton, which he could snack on later.

“By sticking out his tongue and curling it sideways to explore the hairy jungle around his mouth, he was always able to find a tasty morsel here and there to nibble on,” wrote Dahl.

They’re scratchy

While some men like to stroke them when they reach the “soft phase” (whatever that is), from my personal experience, there’s nothing soft about them. The only time my other half grew a proper one, I came out in a rash on my chin. In the name of good relationships, it’s advisable to use your razor regularly gents.

They’re not sexy

Every single male celebrity (perhaps with the one exception of “he who can do no wrong” George Clooney) who has ever grown a full beard – not just designer stubble, which IS sexy – has looked better without it. End of.

They’re ageing

This is partly our explanation for the above, but some of the beards that we’ve seen, including Andrew “Spidey” Garfield’s mini hedge, and anyone’s who grows a little salt and peppery, make men look older. So if you’re a baby-faced Daniel Radcliffe that might be a good thing, if you’re Joaquin Phoenix, maybe not so much.

They’re not magic

The late, great Terry Pratchett totally rocked his white pointy beard because he WAS a wizard – with words. But the rest of you are not wizards (or prairie farmers), and they won’t give you magic powers (or green fingers). Sorry.

Beards - are you a fan or do you think they're unhygienic? Share your thoughts in the Comments box below.