If you could be a fly on the wall in your favorite restaurant's kitchen... you better get the hell out of there before the health department comes. Why would you want your favorite restaurant shut down?! Regardless, chefs in restaurant kitchens have plenty of opinions, and if you hang out in one long enough, you'll probably hear a few. But there are some things you'll never hear a chef say.

A photo posted by Yelp (@yelp) on Jul 28, 2015 at 9:36am PDT

Things they'll never say about customers

"We better make this dish perfect, I hear the customer's a Yelper."

"Everyone gather 'round for this bit of great news! A customer modified a dish we purposely created in a very specific way!"

"I respect any customer who orders a dish and then asks me to plate it so that none of the food touches."

Things they'll never say about servers

"I feel bad for those servers -- they must have super-tired hands from rolling all that silverware."

"Those servers work way harder than me, and are compensated fairly for their hard work!"

"Cooking for 1,200 people is a cakewalk compared to servers who have to write down the names of dishes on a notepad."