Yes, the president* kicked things off in his speech by celebrating the wonder of his own wonderful greatness. And the assembled diplomats laughed and laughed, and that's fairly unprecedented in my lifetime, anyway. But it was the stuff he said that they didn't laugh at, because it wasn't funny at all, that was the meat on which the rest of the world can feast its fear.

The President* of the United States, notable in his business career for going bankrupt three times, failing to make money as a casino owner, and stiffing glaziers, carpenters, landscapers, and other lesser orders of people, got up and essentially called the rest of the world a bunch of deadbeats.

The President* of the United States, notable in his life for doing business with international criminal oligarchs, rejected the "ideology of globalism," as though he understands the words "ideology" and "globalism." I'll give him the benefit of the doubt on "of." He also said we accept the "ideology of patriotism," which not a thing.

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The President* of the United States, notable in his life for not understanding anything from one moment to the next, appeared to threaten Venezuela with sanctions (or worse) and then assured the assembled gobsmackees that the United States "...will not tell you how to live or work or worship."

The President* of the United States, notable in his life for monetizing the presidency to enrich himself through his luxury hotel and his golf resorts, excoriated the leaders of Iran for looting their country's treasury—which they probably have done, but honestly, give him a few more years.

The President* of the United States, notable in his life for complimenting dictators who compliment him, announced that the United States's commitment to a global campaign for human rights in the areas of immigration, war crimes, and, yes, human rights. "We will never surrender America’s sovereignty to an unelected, unaccountable body. America is governed by Americans." The applause from the Kremlin was muted, but sincere.

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And then there was his survey of how the world is changing under his leadership.



There is Saudi Arabia where the king and crown prince are pursuing bold new reforms. There is Israel proudly celebrating its 70th anniversary as a thriving democracy in the holy land. In Poland the great people are standing up for their independence, their security, and their sovereignty.

Saudi Arabia is using American munitions to reform the daylights out of Yemen, a conflict that, earlier in the speech, he pinned on Iran. The Kingdom also is letting several women drive automobiles and isn't throwing absolutely everybody opposed to the regime into the Royal Thumbscrew Penitentiary. Poland is standing up for its sovereignty largely by throwing itself into the warm embrace of a far-right nationalism that is based on pure xenophobia, of which this president* undoubtedly approves, at least as much of it as he understands, which is probably too much, now that I think about it.

The United States is withdrawing from a world that, for good and ill, it helped make. We need to reinforce the good and atone for the ill, and neither job is anywhere near done. I think this guy is going to stiff the people working on all of it and then run for the hills when the bills come due.

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Charles P. Pierce Charles P Pierce is the author of four books, most recently Idiot America, and has been a working journalist since 1976.

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