Today at a restaurant, my 13-year-old son told me he was disappointed that the server didn’t bring a “check” like he promised – he brought a bill. My son said that he would have preferred a check, for any amount, to a bill.

We go boating, biking and motorcycling. For consistency, I think we should base all verbs on their noun counterparts. Some might require altering the spelling a bit. For example, riding in a car we might write that we went carring in order to differentiate it from caring. I personally spent today fooding – I fooded everything I seed.

Why are there hotel rooms & motel rooms but instead of “inn rooms,” we have to say “rooms at the inn”?

Anonymoose – a moose in the witness protection program

There is an “ass” in every “class.” Since the teacher is the only person who is in every class, well, draw your own conclusions.

Why isn’t the word palindrome a palindrome?

Here are 2 bad jokes/word plays which you can torture a loved one with:

1. It tuchus a long time to get there, but ass alright.

2. A pirate can turn a fiend into a friend with just one little “Arrrrr.”

Bring back Fastly! We have quick & quickly; why not fast & fastly? It turns out that “fastly” used to exist and it died out. Now, people use the word “fast,” both as an adjective and an adverb. Well, I’m not OK with that. I hereby declare my intention to use the word “fastly,” regardless of the danger it puts me in with the grammar cops.

And finally, it’s Spring here in the Northeast of the United States. Spring Time rearranges to spell “Sing Permit,” so feel free to spontaneously erupt in song at any time. But be careful, because Outside Music rearranges to spell Sue Idiot Scum, which may foretell the reaction you’ll get.

Need more wordification? Click this daisy:

