A Pasadena woman reached out to me via Facebook this week about an incident at her daughter’s school.

“According to my 5-year-old,” the mom wrote, “one of her classmates grabbed her hand and forced her to pinkie promise that she would believe in God. My daughter now feels pressure to keep her promise.”

Like many parents, this mom wants her little girl to make up her own mind about what to believe— so she is loathe to pressure her in any particular direction. And yet here is a 5-year-old child trying to navigate an incredibly touchy subject — the intersection of belief and non-belief — on the kindergarten schoolyard.

What’s a parent to do?

First of all, as hard as it is to watch our kids struggling in the position of “outcast,” it’s really important that we encourage them to be honest and true to themselves whenever possible. Whether they are 5 or 15, they shouldn’t feel they have to lie about who they are, or feel ashamed for having different thoughts or feelings than other kids. Being unique is a good thing; standing up for yourself is a great thing.

If this comes up in your house, you might try role playing some various scenarios, providing kids with some potential talking points to help them through. Here are eight things secular kids can say to dispel or divert religious evangelism with their friends at school.