

HOLLYWOOD CA -- Renowned fighting game player and wall-denting enthusiast Eliver "KillerKai"Ling recently announced his retirement from the fighting game tournaments, citing his intention to concentrate exclusively on his acting career. The announcement came swiftly after a disappointing 9th-place finish at Norcal Regionals, a dimly lit tournament hosted in Sacramento, California.



"There has never been opportunity in the film world for an actor of ambiguous oriental descent" said Mr. Ling. "Whether the role calls for Japanese, Chinese… pretty much any of the 'eses or 'eans — an actor like myself can fit the role, given that the average white person can't tell the difference." Ling continued on to describe, at great length, his joys of portraying such rich characters as "Asian Thug", "Ming Warrior", and "Nguyen".



Mr. Ling was also quick to point out that his earnings as a film star have already proven more lucrative than his winnings as a professional gamer. "Just the other day, I made $50 as 'Miko's gang member (uncredited)' and I got free catered lunch on top of that," said an elated Ling. "I think I made the right decision to move forward with my career in acting." Eliver's latest starring role as "Stuntman" in the film "Anita Ho" only reinforces this notion, and although FGCNN's research team was unable to determine whether Ling plays as a stuntman or a character named "Stuntman" in the film, they did agree that it'd be more awesome if it were the latter.



Do you think that Eliver Ling is better suited for the acting world? Will the fighting game scene be the same without KillerKai in their tournament brackets? How do you escape from ApologyMan's unblockable setups? Sound off in the comments!

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