Two months after the U.N. Human Rights Council excoriated North Korea for “crimes against humanity”, the reclusive kingdom has released its own analysis of the “serious human rights situation in the U.S.”

According to the report, the U.S. is the world’s “worst human rights abuser,” with its citizens trapped in a “living hell.” The report paints a dystopian nightmare of soaring crime rates, enabled by lax gun control laws and rising unemployment, abetted by a rapacious ruling class, and racism spreading under a mysterious law identified as the “citizenship act.”

And as his administration heaps abuses on its people, President Obama, the report finds, “indulges himself in luxury almost every day, squandering hundred millions of dollars on his foreign trip in disregard of his people’s wretched life.”

The “analysis” was published on a North Korean newswire last week. The U.N.’s Human Rights Council has yet to weigh in.

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