Question

How do I tell my mother that I don't care about what she thinks about me?

Community Answer

Think carefully about why you want to do this. Is she overly critical of you? Does she put you down, insult you, or hurt your feelings? If this is so, while what you’re feeling is understandable, there are more productive ways to say the same thing, but in an assertive way. If you continuously maintain your position, this could help over time. For instance, if she’s right in the middle of putting you down, yelling or berating at you, you can state (calmly — deep breathe to relax and slow down your adrenalin rush), “Mom, I hear what you’re saying, but it hurts my feelings when you say it that way to me, and it’s not helpful to what I am going through. I will listen to you when you can have a calm conversation with me.” Your mom might not understand why you’re fighting with each other all the time and can be just as frustrated as you are. She might not even know that she’s hurting you. Telling her in the best way possible can give you and her a shot to start relating to each other. If you feel you need support in communicating with your parents, you can see your school counselor and ask for help.