I remember the very moment I realized the Book of Mormon was inspired scripture. The sound of truth reverberated in me like a gong. I was shaken. “Uh-oh, maybe my vision was real,” I thought to myself. Human beings have an amazing capacity for denial. Despite my visionary experience on that fateful December night, almost one year ago now, I had not blindly accepted what I had been told. After all, perhaps I was merely crazy. Perhaps my “vision” was just a fluke, a glitch, a daydream. On the other hand…

I had to know. I had to find out. The only thing to do to verify my vision was to scrutinize the Book of Mormon, the pillar of my vision. If I could find fault in the Book of Mormon, I could dismiss my vision as whimsical fancy or temporary insanity. If I found truth there, then… Well, best worry about that later, I thought then. So I dove deep in to the Book of Mormon, casting the nets of inquiry across the pages. I intended to haul whatever lay within to the surface, to be laid bare for examination beneath the burning light of the rational mind. Before I was even out of the first book, I was struck by what I had uncovered.

It was in 1 Nephi 11. A man named Lehi, after leading his family from Jerusalem, had “a dream, a vision,” of an Iron Rod leading to the Tree of Life. I was immediately intrigued by Lehi’s “dream.” I saw my own reflection smiling back at me from behind the words. It was a curious sensation, but I shook it off and continued. It was when Lehi’s son Nephi asked the Holy Spirit to show him the vision his father had seen that I was truly startled in to realization.

You see, I had studied the Tree of Life in the Jewish Kabbalah tradition, poring over the Sepher Yetzirah and commentaries on it for the past five or six years, led by the phenomenal scholarship of Rabbi Aryeh Kaplan. In the garden of Eden there was a tree just beside the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil from which Adam and Eve partook of the fruit that caused their fall, and that tree was the Tree of Life. “And the LORD God (YHVH) said, ‘Behold, the man is become as one of Us, knowing good and evil; and now lest he put forth his hand, and take also from the Tree of Life, and eat, and live forever: So the LORD God (YHVH) banished him from the Garden of Eden to work the ground from which he had been taken” (Gen 3:22-23)

This passage puzzled me for a very long time. Who was the YHVH speaking to when he referred to “us?” And what is the nature of the name YHVH anyway? How is the “YHVH” different from the “Elohim” who created the Cosmos in the first book of Genesis? What is the nature of the tree of life that YHVH is referring to, sitting next to the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil?

The Kabbalists held that the Tree of Life was an archetype or almost geometric model for the universe, with its roots in the infinitely small, and branches stretched to the infinitely large. The Tree of Life is sometimes said to be the true Torah itself, the blueprint of all creation. In that Kabbalistic blueprint, words are very powerful things. They contain a quality, a quantity, and communicate the self-nature of a thing in a very real, direct way. Every word in the Torah is a building block of the Kingdom of God. Every word is part of the structure of our very existence.

The Name of God: YHVH, the Tetragrammaton, which in English is most often rendered as Jehovah, is not the same in the Torah as the name of God “Elohim.” It refers to something other than God the Father. In the Rabbinical commentaries it is said that YHVH was the first Word of God, which was the word uttered by Elohim to create the Cosmos as we know it. If we break down this word in to its Hebrew letters, we have yud heh vav heh. Turning to my understanding of the Sepher Yetzirah, I realized that this “word” that began the universe was the sound of breathing! “Yud” is the single point, the thud of arrival of consciousness, then “heh,” the outbreath, then “vav” the inbreath, then “heh” the outbreath again, literally breathing life in to the universe. When I thought of the creative Word of God, this Tetragrammaton, a reference from the New Testament popped in to my mind.

“In the beginning was the Word (YHVH), and the Word was with God (Elohim), and the Word (YHVH) was God (El). The same (YHVH) was in the beginning with God (Elohim). All things were made by him (YHVH); and without him was not any thing made that was made. In him was life; and the life was the light of men. And the light shineth in darkness; and the darkness comprehendeth it not.” John 1:1-5. “And the Word (YHVH) was made flesh, and dwelt among us (as Jesus), (and we beheld his glory, the glory as of the only begotten of the Father (Elohim),) full of grace and truth.”

So the LORD God, YHVH, Jehovah, that is, Jesus Christ, said to God the Father (Elohim) in the garden, “Behold the man is become as one of Us, knowing good and evil.” But why did Jehovah then forbid the fruit of the tree of life from Adam and Eve, and cast them out of the garden? At this point we come full circle to the Book of Mormon.

In 1 Nephi 11:7 we read, “And behold this thing shall be given unto thee for a sign, that after thou hast beheld the tree which bore the fruit thy father tasted (the fruit of the tree of life), thou shalt also behold a man descending out of heaven, and him shall ye witness; and after ye have witnessed him ye shall bear record that it is the Son of God.”

11:8 And it came to pass that the spirit said unto me: Look! and I looked and beheld a tree; and it was like unto the tree which my father had seen; and the beauty thereof was far beyond, yea, exceeding of all beauty; and the whiteness thereof did exceed the whiteness of the driven snow

11:9 And it came to pass after I had seen the tree, I said unto the Spirit: I behold thou hast shown unto me the tree which is precious above all.

11:10 And he said unto me: “what desirest thou?’

11:11 And I said unto him: To know the interpretation thereof–for I spake unto him as a man speaketh; for I beheld that he was in the form of a man; yet nevertheless, I knew that it was the Spirit of the Lord; and he spake unto me as a man speaketh with another.

11:16 And he said unto me: Knowest thou the condescension of God?

11:21 And the Angel said unto me: Behold the Lamb of God, yea, even the Son of the Eternal Father! Knowest thou the meaning of the tree which thy father saw?

11:22 And I answered unto him, saying: Yea, it is the love of God(!), which sheddeth itself abroad in the hearts of the children of Men, wherefore it is the most desireable above all things.

11:25 And it came to pass that I beheld that the rod of iron, which my father had seen, was the word of God (YHVH!), which led to the fountain of living waters, or to the tree of life; which waters are a representation of the love of God; and I also beheld that the tree of life was a representation of the love of God.

11:26 And the angel said unto me again: Look and behold the condescension of God!

And it was as if the angel had spoken directly to me: Look and behold! The Iron Rod is the Word of God, YHVH, the breath of life in the world! The Tree of Life and the Fountain of Living Waters are the wellspring of God’s love for all of us, his children! I was struck dumb and smitten by the most powerful, joyful, compassionate blow of truth.

No trickster had written this to get gain on his fellow man! This was the true Word of God! The mental images I had of Joseph Smith staring at stones in a hat and reciting the Book of Mormon to the people who recorded it now took on a whole different light. No man could fabricate such a thorough and truthful doctrine off the top of his head as some kind of party trick to try to make a buck on some upstate New York farmers. This MUST be a revelation, a truly inspired work sent by the divine hand of God himself.

I was shocked, as if I had been struck by lightning. As if God had reached down himself and touched me and said “this is the truth.” I knew then that the Book of Mormon was true, and that I truly had found the restored Church of Jesus Christ upon this Earth. I write this testimony in his holy name, even the name of Jesus Christ. Amen.