One of the sneakiest and worst verbal game killers are filler words like:

Umm

Yeah

Hmmm

Ok

Cool!

Me too!

Haha

Sweet

Awesome

Uhuh

Most of these fillers occur from the male while the female is speaking. Unconsciously, you want to feel like she knows you are listening intently, so you fill the spaces while she talks. But while these filler words are being employed, you are rarely listening to the girl, but instead betraying the insecure fact that you are “thinking” and attempting to build rapport. By acting thoughtful and agreeable, you are actually decreasing her attraction to you. You are seeking rapport. A big no no. Always assume rapport, but never seek it. Not from anyone you wish to consider you as greater than equal.

Here’s an example of filler dialogue:

Girl: Yeah I’m two years into my degree

Man: Cool!

Girl: So my friend Christine said if I met her to day she would help me…

Man: Hmmmm

Girl: ….with my essay, but she’s never on time…

Man: Haha.

Girl: ….because her car is in the shop right now.

Man: Ohh that sucks.

Being pleasant and agreeable is nice, but it won’t help you get laid. Unconsciously the woman prefers the man who is almost bored with her surface level drivel. She wants to feel like she needs to capture your attention, or that if she makes a mistake she will bore and lose you.

Now, this does not mean you tell her she is a boring conversationalist. Especially not if you want to have sexual intercourse in the near future. Just make her think that you think she is. Keep it all in her head. This is easy to accomplish: Don’t fill the gaps with noises and aha’s.

Be mostly silent. Turn down the filler by about 75%. Not completely off or you risk coming off as a sociopath. And not with your boss at work, as he wants to hear you go, “Hmmm, yeah, ok, cool.” This shows him you are listening. A woman may consciously say she wants you to listen, but really, she just wants you to remember what she said. You don’t need to show her you’re listening. A boss doesn’t act this way with his employees, and you shouldn’t act this way with women.

And if you’re one of those rare, beautiful women who read great books, have interesting stories and are able to capture my imagination…I still won’t use filler words. But I will see you more than twice.

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