UPDATE: We’ve revised this post to replace disputed Rush comments with confirmed-by-video ones. After all, we want to be fair. And balanced.

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Rush Limbaugh wants to be an NFL owner. Or does he? Jason Whitlock says it’s a publicity stunt, and he may be right. Glenn Beck has been getting a lot of run lately and Rash needs to maintain his position as the Barking Right’s alpha blowhard. Whitlock also wonders why the NFL’s uber-dominator, Commish Roger Goodell, didn’t immediately neuter this, the Mother of All Bad Ownership Ideas. After all, a high percentage of the league’s players, coaches and fans are black, and Rush has a history of saying bad things about black people. Some samples:

Obama is “more African in his roots than he is American” and is “behaving like an African colonial despot”

“Barack Obama has picked up another endorsement: Halfrican American actress Halle Berry.” Limbaugh then said: ” ‘As a Halfrican American, I am honored to have

Ms. Berry’s support, as well as the support of other Halfrican Americans,’ Obama said.” Limbaugh then conceded that Obama “didn’t say it.”

“Obama has disowned his white half … he’s decided he’s got to go all in on the black side”

Obama “the greatest living example of a reverse racist”

Limbaugh sings “Barack, The Magic Negro”

“Here you have a black president trying to destroy a white policeman”

“[W]e saw white firefighters under assault by agents of Barack Obama”; “Now white policemen are under assault”

Obama would not have acted if he’d known that the Somali pirates were “actually young, black Muslim teenagers”

Limbaugh suggests Dems, media believe “you can’t criticize the little black man-child”

Obama’s nomination “goes back to the fact that nobody had the guts to stand up and say no to a black guy”

“The government’s been taking care of [young blacks] their whole lives”

“The days of them not having any power are over, and they are angry”

There was also the time ESPN was dumbass enough to let Limbaugh on their pre-game show. That didn’t work out so well, did it?

Let’s set aside for a second the obvious troubling question about how a team with Rush at the helm would get new players, since presumably it would dodge the draft. And the also-obvious question of whether, given its stance against illegal drug use, the league would be forced to ban Limbaugh from his own facility. Instead, let’s ask a more basic question: why would a guy like Limbaugh want to own an NFL team, knowing all the hassle involved in the process?

I think I have it figured out. Because it’s the closest he can get, in this day and age, to actually being able to buy, sell and trade Negros.

There. I said it.