Christmas has come and gone, and with it the candy canes, tinsel, eternally tangled Christmas lights, detailed plans to avoid spending time with family, and gift giving. My gift to you all is three recaps in this one week, but that’s less a Christmas miracle and more getting back on track after a brief delay caused by V4C5’s recap being, y'know, as cursed as the Defence Against The Dark Arts teaching position. The middle of a trilogy is either way better than the first movie or a Matrix: Reloaded, so judge for yourself as this week, Ren finds out who killed his parents, Weiss meets her soulmate, and Tyrian puts his theatre degree to good use. Old and busted recaps over yonder the RECAP MASTERPOST, new hotness below.

True story. As all episodes should start, finish, and contain all throughout the middle, we begin with Team RNJR.

Naturally, they’re like a popular ABC science fiction show that ran from 2004 to 2010. Well, they’re not actually lost, but it’s been six to eight months and they haven’t found Haven yet, and, y'know, I’m trying to increase my quota of Lost references.

Enjoy this one light moment, ‘cause we got both Hurricane Ren’s Tragic Backstory, Cyclone Weiss’s Breakdown, and Class 3 Tropical Storm Tyrian building off the coast, and the walled town at the end of the road is just the early drizzle…

The first thing you’ll notice about this town is that it’s not as burn-y as the one from the V4 Trailer or as the recently corpse-y as Shion, so at least we’re keeping things fresh. In fact, it looks half-built, abandoned rather than destroyed, hence why it didn’t appear on Jaune’s map. Also, that means it wasn’t Raven’s fault. Probably.

Oniyuri wasn’t just another destroyed village, and despite having the same end result, it wasn’t a simple expansion like Mountain Glenn. This village was an attempt to create a whole new kingdom, the richest of the rich of Mistral thumbing their aristocratic noses at the rule of the Council and getting to live by their own rules, eat ice cream for dinner, set their own bedtimes, et cetera.

I like to think Oniyuri was also an attempt to deliberately ape Atlas, which had somewhat accidentally stumbled onto their new status as a kingdom to replace Mantle, and also that the fact it didn’t work led to a whole bunch of rich people’s resources either disappearing or being taken as loot… which makes you also think about the reputation of Mistral for having seedy underbellies. Was it the unchecked criminal element that led to the Gatsbys bailing on the Kingdom, or did it only really start after they’d died and been replaced by less savoury rich folk? Regardless, the story of Oniyuri is further reminder that the Grimm put humanity on the ropes in four main kingdoms for a reason, and for Ren, it’s also his superhero origin story.

We seemed to be building up to some kind of backstory reveal for Ren this season, and this is it. His parents believed in this new kingdom, and died to a Grimm that also made a cameo appearance at Shion’s destruction. And, curiouser and curiouser, it’s just the one Grimm, which… which is going to be a thing. The evocation of Mountain Glenn makes me wonder if the Oniyurians also decided to build their town next door to a sleeping dragon (we’ll name him Yuri if so), or… is it Godzilla? Jormungandr? The Smoke Monster? I don’t know, and I don’t fancy finding out.



Hey if Weiss can have a brother and a mother and Blake can be a Disney Princess, a n y t h i n g goes. We still don’t technically know Jaune isn’t a mermaid, I’m just throwing it out there. Just picture it.

With this reveal and all the Ren sadness, I’m kinda hoping we never get a direct Nora backstory, just an increasingly ridiculous throwaway lines, like “So back at the circus we used to…” and “Well after my home planet Krypton blew up…” and “I was a virgin birth, no big deal.” Anyways, we’ll leave RNJR there, wandering through yet another ghost town, and see what Weiss is up to.

So that concert we set up in Weiss’s last appearance is right now. Okay then. Kinda thought there would be a bigger lead-up, but no complaints given where it took us, and hey, badass new Weiss song is always, always, appreciated. This song is also the least subtle thing since platform shoes with goldfish in them, with lyrics specifically designed to target people who don’t actually listen to the lyrics of a song (aka the Pumped Up Kids effect). “I’m not your pawn” “This life is mine” “Your moustache sucks, Dad.” kinda makes you wonder what she’s really singing about, doesn’t it?

In the after-party, Weiss suffers through her father and his moustache’s ego-stroking competitions with the other Scrooges, while her brother Whitley just hangs in the background…

Yeaaaaah.

It’s scary how quickly Jacques tries to stop Weiss from leaving his side. He pushed her into this concert, put her on the stage, and he probably spent the whole night proudly boasting that his semen produced such a talent; he’s a regular Billy Ray Cyrus.

Speaking of assholes, and then there’s this glorious idiot with the hair interrupting Weiss trying to reminisce about Beacon:

On this night, with this girl, and with what being designed to look like a guy that this girl actually did have a thing for in more innocent days, this guy didn’t stand a fuckin’ chance. The anticipation rises in the first-time watcher: is this guy existing in this scene because Weiss is going to make an actual friend, or is he just a douche who’s going to set off a series of events that make things worse for Weiss?



The latter it is!

Shallow small talk becomes all the shallower when Henry doesn’t even know that A) they’re at a charity event -

- or B) that it’s for the Fall Of Beacon, aka the biggest event in the last six to eight months.

Three strikes, yer out. I do love seeing Weiss’s, for lack of better term, rich bitch side be weaponised in such a way; way back in V1 the Ice Queen’s wrath was the thing to fear, but we’re cheering her today. It’s a righteous anger, a helpless and frustrated burst of something that’s about to fully erupt… Henry got off easy, all said.

While I did half expect some noodly blonde to slide up and pick up where Henry left off to really help drive that point of contrasting Beacon and Atlas experiences, instead Weiss stares at the Beacon painting and the completely irony-free Show The World We Care title as the buzz of the crowd, like flies wearing jewels and pretending they’re not wading in their own shit, overwhelms her… and then one trophy wife opens her mouth.

It’s no wonder Weiss reacts about as well as Benjamin Linus did when he met Jacob. They don’t get it. How could they, so far north, living in mansions and castles, higher than high and farther than far, detached and cold to all those below them. They are the richest of the rich that probably deserved to get eaten than Ren’s parents. Unless Ren’s parents were dicks. I mean, genetically, Ren won the lottery, but maybe orphaning him was the best thing to happen to his attitude? That being said, fanfics with Ren as the rich kid and Nora the orphan can be found where exactly…?

Jacques comes for his daughter, and comes with yet another elbow grab, but Weiss won’t have it. She’s changed too much, a fighter trained (for like half a year) and bloodied (mostly in other people’s), and has been fighting back for six to eight goddamn months. The Weiss of the White Trailer got on stage and curtsied when her song was over. This Weiss curtsies for no bitch, and her song ain’t over.

What happens next was long coming. The first time she actively used her summoning semblance, Weiss was trying to sacrifice herself for like the fifth time, all to defend a fellow student, but now… The painting, a blue-haired idiot, and now the Boarbatusk she killed all the way back in V1C10; everything is what she knew but it’s warped, and while her anger plays a part in the summoning, since the boar goes after the mouthy trophy wife, it comes from a place of fear, for her father was trying to take her away again.

Even before I saw Jacques’s moustache go all quivery from anger and Weiss’s look of sheer fear, I knew this would be a disaster. I did root for it to be a disaster with perhaps a few corpses, but what I got was even better!

There he is. There’s the guy. Showing up like the Mysterious Stranger from Fallout, to kill that Grimm for a second time. Poor thing.

The unfortunately un-gored trophy wife demands Weiss’s arrest (shoutout to Yang this time last season, amirite), but Ironwood remains the greatest character, and from his perfectly sculpted jaw comes words of support for Weiss. Even Jacques’s glare can’t beat that. Well, it can, because I’m writing this after V4C7’s come out, and, well, hoooooooo boy will we get to that.

For now I’ll say it’s cool how Weiss, Blake and Yang’s arcs are running on similar tracks within this first half of the season. They’ve all come home, one way or one less limb or another, and had to confront how they’ve evolved, what they can’t escape, and find their new resolves. Yang’s put on her new arm, Blake’s not done with the White Fang, and Weiss ain’t no one’s pawn. It’s going to get worse before it can get better, for all three of them, but still gotta be proud that they’re fighting.

Ruby, meanwhile, has always had the simpler resolve; it’s kinda like we’re getting a season based on the idea presented in V2C10 after Oobleck had WBY doubting why they were doing what they were doing, while R just did what R did. Unfortunately, that doesn’t make things any easier, and her own Rubyness has a consequence-shaped storm-a-comin’.

Ren’s the one who senses the danger first - similar to how he sensed the King Taijitu back in V1, so it’s probably his Semblance - and the danger comes fast; Tyrian doesn’t even introduce himself before he’s beating back Ren, and in his first bout with Ruby he gets in a hit that sends her Aura flaring, and then decides to say hi to Jaune -

- before he even gets to the introduction part. And, here’s the best part: the moment conversation begins, Tyrian drops one act and puts on another.

And by God I don’t think I’ve ever seen such an instant flip on fandom opinion of a villain. Admittedly when you start with a cackling anime villain you don’t expect much beyond a guy who’s probably going to die quickly, but this guy’s a special brand of special, and helps fill some of the void left by Torchwick, that charismatic so-and-so.

Am intensely curious about him finding Jaune interesting -

- but that could be anything from his massive aura to his amazing shampoo and conditioner routine, so I’m going to leave that one.

Ruby being unaware of why Tyrian’s there gets him laughing as if she’s a comedic genius on the level of a prop comic or someone who makes the “how did they make more than one Final Fantasy? It’s called Final Fantasy guys!” joke, but it’s clear he’s not there to sell her life insurance.

Well, he might sell her life insurance, then kill her, and take the money from the life insurance for himself! The madman! Nora won’t let that happen, though, and d'aww RNJR friendship is the bestest.

Jaune steps forward too, and Tyrian takes that rejection like a proper Yandere, and goes for him first.

Cue the fight, and it’s awesome 'cause Tyrian is fast. It’s quite something to see Qrow and Winter or Cinder and Ozpin go at each other with their super speed, but to see someone of the upper calibre just go to town on our heroes, and also makes things tense as dicks. He’s in total control, laughing all the while, but he’s not laughing for long, because hey, remember back in the V4C1 recap I said it’d be funny if we saw Ruby shoot Nora with one of her electricity bullets?

Ta-da! The power of electromagnetism has many benefits, such as curing cancer and time travel and whatever was going on with Walt, but it can’t stop a surprise reveal: Tyrian is a Scorpio.

And a Scorpion Faunus. Just a coincidence.

There was already like a dozen horribly tragic childhood backstories that could make a villain like Tyrian, but him being a Faunus may just say it all. Ruby, having not watched the scenes with her not in them, is a step or two behind, thinking him one of the White Fang…

And then thinking he’s there to avenge my boy Guzma Roman T…

And then again thinking that the goddess Tyrian is working for is Cinder. Like damn Ruby, read the Wiki sometime, it’s clearly Neo.

Scorpius Malfoy leaps back into the fray and doesn’t let anyone stay in the way of his true target long.

As the fight continues, growing more and more desperate with every second, so too does the beating of the black wings of a red-eyed crow flying into the city, who then upsets those three guys who didn’t actually think Qrow could transform into a crow and that it was all a red herring.

With Ruby’s Aura depleted completely, The Scorpion from The Scorpion And The Frog raises his stinger for the kill -

- as Ren and Nora and Jaune look on in horror…

But the tail doesn’t gouge out any silver eyes, not today. Stinger meets metal, and Ruby looks up at her saviour in disbelief, relief, and finally, joy. It’s been six to eight months since she’s seen her family, and while Ruby Rose knows she can’t just go home, sometimes, just sometimes, you get lucky and home comes to you, half drunk and saving you from a psychotic scorpion man. And that’s all that matters. Merry Christmas, everyone.

Well, it’s not Christmas anymore, but I think Hanukkah started, so… Happy Hanukkah?

We’re at the midpoint of the season now, six down six to go, and I just thought I’d take a moment to talk about how comfortable I am with how everything’s going. Like, when Volume 3 ended it ended in a place I loved because of the potential and the multiple storylines, and we’re getting exactly what I’ve hoped for. Elements set up have already paid off - Tyrian’s come after Ruby, Weiss has had her concert, Blake’s come home, Yang’s got her new arm on - and we’ve got tons to look forward to in the back half: the continuing adventures of Oscar the Farmboi, Weiss, Blake and Yang dealing with their problems, RNJR’s got their Obi Wan and will probably be arriving in Mistral literally the day Salem’s plan for Haven goes down, and both Raven’s tribe and the Grimm that destroyed Shion and Oniyuri still roam the countryside… So much awesomeness. And I know this might be a horrifying notion for some, but it’s getting increasingly unlikely we’ll get a reunion of Team RWBY this season, and, quite frankly, I don’t think I want that yet. The longer it takes, the more earned it’ll be, and the longer we can keep RNJR together any interference from those Yokos, the better.

Anyways, just enjoyin’ the ride, and hope you’re all enjoying it too. Until next time, thanks for reading.