I’m confused.

I can’t quite make out what’s happening.

First, we were told calling out someone’s gender is wrong — waitress, waiter, etc. Then we were told gender doesn’t exist — it’s a social construct. Then we were told gender is inherent, therefore people can legally change theirs with medical confirmation. Then we were told that gender isn’t really gender at all — despite the antiquated notion of female and male — and despite the fact that the very notion of gender comes from the existence of binary biological sex — there are actually limitless genders (here).

And though gender was initially described as a social construct and eventually fluid — therefore, meaningless — then we were told it’s punishingly important. Literally punishingly — California passed a law doling out fines and/or jail time to senior care workers who “misgender” their patients. In New York, you can be fined up to $250,000 in the misgendering department.

Now here’s something even more confusing: If you strip everybody nekkid, then suddenly we’re back to just men and women.

Will there ever be a transgender nudist colony? How will you know?

And all of the above edicts, though listed serially, are somehow concurrently true.

Here’s another thing: While it’s wrong for a restaurant to force women to wear skirts and men to wear pants…and while, because gender is a social construct, who’s to say a man wears slacks and a woman dresses…at the core of someone declaring themselves transgender — a medical idea — is the changing of clothing to that gender’s “socially constructed” version.

So the people who are no slaves to society are slaves to society.

Though a bra isn’t for girls and a jock strap isn’t for guys, a guy identifying as a girl will put on a bra to live his truth. But if you combine all the rules, it should be true for a man to identify as a woman who doesn’t conform to the social construct. So you should be able to be a naturally-born guy and change literally nothing about your clothes or body or appearance…you should be able to still have a hairy chest and a penis and wear men’s clothes and sport a beard…and now be a woman.

To be clear, none of this is meant to be at all humorous; I’m genuinely confused, because it’s extremely complicated.

And how does all that play into Portland’s new move to do away with urinals? And what does a method for catching urine have to do with identity?

“I’m not a man; I’m a woman.” “I’m not a woman or a man; I’m a banana slug.” Okay, but speaking words doesn’t change the way your pee comes out.

Nevertheless, the hipster town sent out an email to city employees last February regarding the remodeled public Portland Building:

We will continue to have gender-specific (male and female) multi-stall restrooms that are readily available to any employee that prefers to use one. But, there will be no urinals in any restroom in the building. This will give us the flexibility we need for any future changes in signage.

Therefore, urinals are banned, even in the Men’s room. (Paris has the opposite idea — see here.)

It shouldn’t be so, but we all know it’s true: Prepare to have a whoooole lot more urine on the toilet seats.

And how’s that lookin’ for the impending destruction of the world, and the woke fight against it (here)?

As noted by talk show host Lars Larson:

Finally, in a place constantly lecturing us about protecting the environment (you know, plastic straws etc) this will waste a tremendous amount of water I checked and most urinals take as little as a pint of water per flush (1/8 gallon). Even “modern” toilets flush with more than a gallon of water. Some “no flush” urinals use no water at all. Multiply this by hundreds of thousands of flushes a year. Figure out how this makes sense.

Here’s more on the Portland Building: As reported by KGW 8, every floor will have at least one any-gender restroom.

The 1st, 34th, and 15th floors will sport multi-stall bathrooms so men and women can take dumps together.

‘Cause that’s what everybody wants, apparently.

Chief Administrative Officer Tom Rinehart, who wrote the February email, is convinced:

I am convinced that this is the right way to ensure success as your employer, remove arbitrary barriers in our community, and provide leadership that is reflective of our shared values.

The total remodel will cost taxpayers $195,000,000.

-ALEX

Relevant RedState links in this article: here, here, and here.

See 3 more pieces from me:

The Far Left Is Making Teens Miserable Over The Imminent Destruction Of The World

Think You’ve Heard The Stupidest Thing Ever? I Disagree. Witness The Woke’s New Condemnation Of IKEA

A Hit-Making Music Star Announces He’s No Longer A Man

Find all my RedState work here.

And please follow Alex Parker on Twitter and Facebook.

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