Yesterday, I was woken with a start by a call from someone who wanted me to talk on the radio about millennials, an age bracket that tops out at 37, and starts in the early 20s: I am not in this range. They had someone who was, but he pulled out, because millennials are snowflakes.

Barclays had conducted research that showed millennials spent £3,000 a year on “treats” – coffees, clothes, going out – and it was going to explain how if they swapped out some of those treats, they could afford to save, then get bigger things such as houses.

I ran some quick numbers on my mighty abacus brain. If you bought a coffee every workday, but not at weekends, and went out once a week for, maybe, a film, a burger and a couple of drinks – but definitely not six drinks, and no cocktails, and hopefully not subbing your friend who hadn’t been paid – that’s three grand right there. No festivals, no mini-breaks, no nail varnish, no train fares to any town you don’t already live in.

Because any chance of them ever owning a house is shot anyway: an option that has always been held, reasonably enough, as the sensible choice for both security in the present and investment in the future.

Move over, millennials and Gen Z – here comes Generation Alpha Read more

We are not talking about a lavish generation. We’re not even talking about the mild, debt-supported profligacy of the turn of the century. Instead, the young are heading towards a life reminiscent of the 1950s, drinking beer in halves and cycling for leisure. It never becomes a social justice issue, because other people have it worse, so they just get patronised by Barclays-style grownups, infantilising them with talk of “treats”. Generation Climate Strike will put up with this for about five seconds, I predict.