Poo me?! No, Poo YOU!

“Honey, your mother sent us something in the mail”

Every once in a while, an idea comes along that’s so much a part of the current zeitgeist that it warrants mention on the zeitgeistiest of zeitgeist sites: ours.

That idea is legally sending poop to someone.

Albeit worm poop, PooYou.com warrants attention for tapping into the basest level of human emotions (that being jealousy and anger) and then sending them through the mail. PooYou says:

“Maybe you’re more enraged by that jackass who sits next to you, the neighbor whose idiot dogs leave messes in your yard, or that evil orthodontist who ruined your teenage years. Finally, you have a way to tell them exactly how you feel with a safe, legal, and direct message that makes your point while helping the environment.”

Though my last concern when being disgruntled enough to send someone poo is the environment, I do see the genius in shipping feces while maintaining some semblance of a conscience. It says, ‘I hate you enough to pay for feces to enter your home but let’s not get the ozone layer involved.’

Apparently, a ‘Poo-You’ message is 100% organic and 100% biodegradable, and has been naturally sterilized, leaving no odor. Yes, I know: where’s the fun in that? But it comes from saying, did you get that box of shit I sent you? And that is priceless.

PooYou.com even sends a package of seeds along with the poo/fertilizer “in hopes that doing something good will make up for [the recipient’s] evil deeds and wretched ways.” But if you’re like me, and would send it someone who is too good that it gets annoying, then the wishful thinking doesn’t really apply. I just hope that sending a goody-two-shoes some poop will bring them closer to my level.

PooYou.com doesn’t simply ship sterilized worm poop. They engage users with virtual poo cards (see below) and a Facebook application that chronicles your “Sh*t List.”

I would’ve titled this, “Boss, you can be a real sh*thead”

With only five slots, you better make sure your list is a succinct recap of all the people and businesses that have screwed you over in life. While I’ve got you here, my top 5 would be:

1. 7-11 hot dogs – for delivering unrepenting diarrhea at 3am 2. George W. Bush – for, above all, smirking like a jackass 3. S.N. – for screwing me out of 2 grand on a business venture 4. Mrs. Mudano – for driving me to therapy in second grade 5. The suburbs – for never having anything open past 9pm, making me drive when I need to walk, gentrification, standardizing the American ideal, and for making lawn mowing a necessity

Whew! That felt good. But darn, there’s so many more. If you want to use the PooYou facebook app, you can download it here.

My craps off to you, PooYou.com, for giving others a place to channel their anger and hone it excrementally.