I stopped celebrating Christmas in 2013, the first Christmas that our suicide crisis centre was open. After witnessing our clients experiencing so much pain as 25 December approached, it never felt right to join in the festivities again.

Walking around shops to the sound of Christmas songs makes me think about the acute pain and distress that our clients are feeling. For some, it might be the first Christmas without a family member or the first one after a painful break-up. There is rawness in the discrepancy between the bright happy festive songs and the sadness that many feel.

We remain open throughout Christmas and the New Year and it is by far our busiest period of the year. For many clients, it is the build-up to Christmas that is the hardest. Once Christmas comes some feel the relief that this season is almost over. For others, it is the day on which they are most at risk.

We are ready to go out to clients’ houses as well as to support them at our suicide crisis centre. On a day when public transport services may be absent, our ability to do this becomes essential.

We do not witness only sadness on Christmas Day, though. We also hear from former clients who have recovered from crisis. It is so touching when this happens. Many people send photos to the charity’s mobile phone on Christmas Day. The connection we build with our clients during their time with us is so important. We are trying to keep them connected with us and indeed with life, at a time when they may be trying so hard to disconnect from it. Our hope is that this connection endures long after they leave our services, so that if they are ever in crisis again, they will know that they can return.

Despite not celebrating Christmas anymore, I can still appreciate some of its impact. I smile when I see the excitement of children as they anticipate the big day, and am happy for people who will be spending time with much-loved family members.

Although Christmas is predominantly a time of sadness for me, it is still a time of hope. I believe that all our clients can survive, and indeed they all have so far. At our suicide crisis centre, we care for them and do all we can to support them through this particularly dark time. It is a privilege to be able to do so. They have the wonderful qualities of kindness, selflessness, sensitivity, courage and integrity. Each client is unique in what they bring to the world. In the future, they will go out into the world and impact positively on other people’s lives. Other people will have the benefit of encountering them.

In the New Year, we can quietly celebrate that.