Depressed Black Metal Frontman Sees Own Face in Rorschach Test

OSLO, Norway — Local black metal frontman “Iscariot” allegedly saw nothing but his own shallow reflection in a Rorschach test administered yesterday by a psychiatrist, sources close to the gauntlet-clad man confirmed.

“Obviously I’m not a child and a weakling, like the members of every other band,” claimed the heavily face-painted lead singer of Angr Agi. “But I’m starting to wonder if I’m in a rut — do I burn churches to destroy the futility that is hope, or to destroy myself? When I saw that piece of paper rocking my corpse paint, I knew I wasn’t special. I’m not the walking embodiment of Satan; I’m just an average man doing whatever I can to be considered evil.”

Iscariot’s father, Per Christensen, reported his son later spent hours at home reworking his appearance.

“He yelled at me to ‘let alone [his] machinations,’ and locked himself in the bathroom with the good mirror,” explained Christensen. “When I saw him again the next day, he’d completely changed his makeup — though he still kinda looked like Uncle Fester. I’m glad he’s taking the time to look inward and become more aware of himself as a human, but if he keeps hogging the bathroom all hours of the day and night to paint his face, I’m going to ask him to move out.”

Psychiatrist Ingrid Mikalsen administered the test and tried to level with Iscariot.

“I told him he was seeing an entirely random splotch of ink, but he just said, ‘Nothing is random. I must create a new mask of death,’ which was a bit alarming,” claimed Dr. Mikalsen, who added, “I’m thinking about scrapping this test — it’s the seventh time in two months I’ve had to talk down a confused and obstinate metal singer after it.”

Dr. Mikalsen would not confirm or deny any diagnosis, but noted, “An adult man storming out of an evaluation to run home and change his face paint is never an encouraging sign.”

Iscariot has reportedly changed his appearance again already after seeing a BBC nature documentary featuring lemurs.