Last week the Everyday Sexism founder won the inaugural Georgina Henry Women in Journalism Award for Innovation. Here she shares what she has learned so far from her time on the Guardian women’s blog

When I started writing for the Women’s Blog, an empathetic friend sent me an email containing a single line of advice, in block capitals: “NEVER READ THE COMMENTS”. While I appreciated the protective sentiment (and do occasionally reflect on its wisdom), I’ve found the engagement of readers to be one of the most revealing and educational parts of this journey. One of my most surprising discoveries has been the universal joy of a cheese pun, but writing the blog has taught me plenty more besides …

Press awards: Everyday Sexism founder wins Georgina Henry prize Read more

You’re never as alone as you think you are

Society has an incredible knack for making people who face inequality feel alone. Women who speak up about sexism are told they need to get a sense of humour. Women who protest about workplace discrimination are accused of rocking the boat. Women who’ve been sexually assaulted are told they must have been asking for it. The past few years have shown me how many people experience injustice in silence, each made to feel they don’t have the right to speak up. But the more women speak out and stand up, the harder it is to silence us.

Some people really hate women’s voices

When I started writing about sexism, the responses shocked me. People told me where and when they’d rape me. They said I was a slut who deserved to die. They listed the weapons they’d use. They threatened to hurt my family. Unsurprisingly, this hurt the most. Politicians told me I’m too “glass half empty” and newspaper picture editors said they needed to make me look “as sexy as possible”. I spoke at a school where an entire hall of boys wolf whistled as I walked on stage, and I gave a speech where a “men’s rights activist” (MRA) handed out fliers to the audience calling me a liar. It hasn’t been the easiest ride.

The future of feminism is in good hands

Reactions from teenage girls have been overwhelming. They’ve set up feminist societies, written articles in school newspapers, and started campaigns on everything from Everyday Sexism to FGM. After I speak at schools they email me with lists of the harassment and assault they’ve experienced. Sometimes only one or two girls will admit to being feminists. Often they face sexist jibes and taunts about “feminazis”. But they still speak up. Their courage is inspiring.

These are not women’s issues, they’re human rights issues

One of the nicest surprises has been the compassionate responses from men. Many described their own experiences (like being ridiculed in the office for asking for parental leave). Others said their eyes had been opened, and shared their strategies for challenging sexism (from protesting about sexist chants at their local football club to lifting their own T-shirts when a woman in the street was told to “get your tits out”). It’s not about men against women, but people against prejudice.

Preconceptions about feminism are hard to break

Old friends have stopped themselves telling a joke in front of me in case I get “offended”. New acquaintances assume I must be perpetually furious, or detest men. Several MRAs nearly exploded with the contradiction when I recently married a man. Strangers have warned that I may one day kill my children, burn down the house, steal my husband’s money and run off with a coven of lesbian witches. (Yes, really).

Sisterhood is strong

People tell me that women are their own worst enemy and what’s really holding us back is how much we bitchy girls hate one another’s success. Which is weird, because I’m supported by the most incredible people in the feminist community and never could have got Everyday Sexism off the ground without the support of an amazing group of volunteers. These women know the power of humour in the face of trolling, and when humour fails, they know the power of gin.

Low-level sexism impacts women’s lives on a daily basis

People say there are specific issues feminists should “focus on”, and others that they shouldn’t make a fuss about. But the overwhelming response to every article I’ve written on street harassment shows that the “minor” things have a massive cumulative impact. The question I’m most frequently asked is: “what’s the worst Everyday Sexism entry?” But it’s impossible to rank these experiences. We must tackle every form of inequality – one of feminism’s greatest strengths is its capacity to fight many battles at once.

Anti-feminists don’t get irony

One commenter said of me: “Sexism doesn’t exist, she’s just a bitch who needs some dick to shut up.” I felt so silly, I wished someone had pointed this out sooner before I wasted so much time and energy campaigning.

There’s still a long way to go

Before I started writing about sexism I was working as an actress, turning up at furniture advert auditions to be told “we’ve decided to sex it up a bit and now you’re taking your top off”. Now I’m lucky enough to work with politicians, universities and police forces on issues I feel passionate about. But there’s still so much to do. We’re working on new international branches of the project and I desperately want to persuade the government to commit to compulsory sex and relationships education. How can we teach kids about composting and calculus, but not about consent? My greatest ambition is to reach a point where sexism is so socially unacceptable that there isn’t anything left to blog about … but that might be some time coming.

Humour can be a powerful weapon

Some of the most effective comebacks are those that pierce prejudice with wit. My favourite feminist joke is from tweeter Laura McBride: “If I had a pound for every time I was told I didn’t need feminism, I’d have 85p each time.”