This is not a rumor. This isn't really even speculation. This is merely staring at a microwave when someone conveniently hands you a pack of Peeps, or wishing that at some point in time Tim Salmon, Mike Trout, and Mike Carp had been managed by a guy named Chip.

Jay Bruce should be on the San Francisco Giants. Hey, the Reds sure do like trading with those Giants, too.

The idea that the Giants could use an additional outfielder isn't wholly foreign, either, as Grant Brisbee opined just over a week ago. That was largely written before Angel Pagan landed on the DL with a hamstring injury - though Pagan's injury history and recent lack of performance provoked the article in general. Brisbee settled on Carlos Beltran as the picture perfect addition for the Giants lineup, one who's both familiar to the franchise from a former stint and still has a bit of life left in his future Hall of Fame legs.

I, on the other hand, had other conclusions, ones that stood to directly benefit the Cincinnati Reds rebuild, and I let Grant know. He, the knowledgeable scribe that he is, responded with an in-depth response as to why said idea wouldn't be as ideal as adding Beltran, and thanked me for my insightful suggestion.

I worked my way through his explanation, and myself reached a conclusion that made enough sense to shelve the idea altogether. Until this morning, that is, when it was announced that Giants RF Hunter Pence was heading to the DL as well, with manager Bruce Bochy saying "Unfortunately, he did a really good job" of injuring the bejeezus out of his right hamstring, according to San Francisco Chronicle scribe Hank Schulman. That means a Giants club that needed outfield help while sporting a healthy Pagan and healthy Pence is now missing them both.

Jay Bruce is almost certainly going to get traded by the Reds, and probably soon. His contract, age, and multi-year swoon brought his name up in trade talks with the Toronto Blue Jays, New York Mets, and Baltimore Orioles in the last calendar year, in which time he's seen peer after peer shipped away for shinier, new models. (Well, we hope shinier.) Add in his resurgent .271/.321/.559 start to the season in a market that's relatively devoid of potent bats and, well, the Reds will likely have their choice of suitors over the next two months, even if the rumored returns won't include any Grade A superprospects.

Bruce could man RF for San Francisco until Pence returns, and then slide over to LF from that point forward, elbowing Pagan into the 4th OF role his .682 OPS and -0.0 bWAR since the beginning of the 2014 season suggest he should be. (No, no, I'm not going to let you yell at me for using Pagan's rough bWAR over that period without citing Bruce's. This is a Cincinnati Reds bloghole, dammit, and I'm not about to concede that Jay can boast a rocket left arm and still own a -1.5 dWAR while leading all of Major League Baseball in triples. These are our cherries, and we will pick them.)

The other advantage Bruce brings is his team option for 2017, one that would be a relative bargain should he continue at his 132ish OPS+ pace. Pagan's a free agent after this season anyway, and the corner OF market in free agency is headlined by Josh Reddick, a 39 year old Beltran, and...well, Jay Bruce, really, if his option was so declined.

Huzzah! We know the respective front offices work well together, as the Reds shipped Mike Leake to the Bay in exchange for Keury Mella and Adam Duvall just last summer - and hoooo don't you think they'd like Duvall back while in this pickle. They also matched up on a trade of Marlon Byrd for Stephen Johnson, which is relevant both for this paragraph's overall point and SEO purposes given recent headline news.

Jay Bruce should be on the San Francisco Giants. He should be. But it's an even year, so for the Giants it won't really matter either way.