Oh, Alec. Dear, demented, snarling, spitting, spewing, cussing, punching, one-man rage machine.

How do you get away with it?

Alec Baldwin, 60, my foe, my secret, guilty crush, was at it again Friday, like a stripper to a pole. He allegedly shoved and struck in the face a 49-year-old Saab-driving nobody who had the temerity to nab the precious parking spot being saved near his East Village pad by a relative for Alec’s enormous ego, and his obscene, gas-guzzling Cadillac SUV.

Oh, Alec.

Doesn’t the driver know who you are? You’re practically royalty, a celebrated narcissist and all-purpose, bullying, brawling superstar.

You’re Alec Freaking Baldwin!

He’s held that deliriously exciting temper in check for more than four years now, tamped down that freaky predilection for tantrums and fisticuffs, quieted his inner Hannibal Lecter — only to have it explode in all its profanity-laced glory on the streets of New York City.

We missed you, big guy! (Or maybe not.)

The last time we saw Alec as his true self, it was May 2014. He was busted after unleashing a torrent of profanities on two uniformed cops who stopped him for riding his bicycle the wrong way down a one-way street in lower Manhattan.

Other greatest hits include his being booted off a flight in 2011 after he refused to turn off his cellphone while playing a game, then bashed a bathroom door in a fit of pique. His brawls with photographers smaller than he is are legendary. And then there was the gay-bashing. He called a British journo a “toxic little queen’’ on Twitter and berated a photographer as a “c—k-sucking fag.’’ (He said he called him a “fathead.’’ Right.)

And then there were the heady days he tweeted at me. Me! “Andrea Peyser, you are as bad a writer as you are filled with self-hatred,’’ he wrote in 2012. He really cares!

Alec has been running roughshod over ordinary people for years. But in each case, he is never punished, and his lunatic anger is never halted. He’s gotten away with it so long, regular rules of behavior simply do not apply.

He was released from custody Friday with a desk appearance ticket for assault and harassment. I expect he’ll be back on “Saturday Night Live” in no time, mocking President Trump — and the rest of us.

Oh, Alec, why can’t we quit you?