A man who says his name is Edward Smith and that he lives in Yelm, Wash., told a British morning TV program on Tuesday that he has had sex with more than 700 cars.

That’s correct: Not in but with.

Monty Python couldn’t make this up.

Reports ITV’s “This Morning:”

Since he was 14 years old, Edward Smith, 63, has slept with over 700 lovers! But only one has been a human being – all the others have been different makes and models of cars. Edward is a mechaphile, someone who is sexually attracted to machines, and has bedded Mustangs, luxury Jaguars and even a helicopter.

Now for the weird part. Mr. Smith has decided that his days of playing the field — parking lot? showroom? — and he has settled down with a single love: A VW Beetle he calls Vanilla.

Here he is:

Smith had made a splash in the UK before.

A year ago, The Mirror reported that he had had sex with more than 1,000 cars.

He said: “Some guys look at boobs and bums on beautiful women. I look at the front and rear on beautiful cars.” Edward, who first became attracted to machines in his teens, went on to bonk hundreds of vehicles and at his peak was having sex with one a week.

Smith also appears in a 22008 documentary “My Car Is My Lover.”

Buzzfeed notes that Twitter has gone all atwitter over Smith’s TV interview Tuesday morning.

Our favorites: “I bet he was ‘gone in 60 seconds.’ ” And “Not tonight, dear, I’m tyred.”

Happy motoring, commuters.