The Human Condition Book One # 3

IF I were a young mother who had become my mother.

Keri was dancing and twirling, hopping and laughing.

Suddenly her mother shouted, “No! Not in the living room!”

At that moment, Keri’s hand hit the lamp, crashing it to the hardwood floor.

Her mother angrily said, “Oh Keri! It is ruined now!”

Bending to pick up the lamp, she missed the stricken look on her daughter’s face.

During their mid-afternoon snack, Keri reached for another cookie and bumped her milk. Wide-eyed, she watched as the cup tipped over, rolled off the table and bounced on the floor. Milk was everywhere.

With a sigh of exasperation, her mother said, “Oh Keri, look what you have done.”

Yanking a towel from the rack, she did not see her daughter’s look of shame.

That night, Keri and her mother were sitting in bed with a new book. Her mother was reading about a desperate battle between the prince and the wicked witch: “…and the witch began to use one of her most powerful spells. Her voice was so terrible the prince shook with fear.”

Keri interrupted, “Are you a witch Mommy?”

Her mother laughed and said, “Of course not Sweetheart. Why?”

Keri looked away.

After a moment, her Mother softly asked, “What is it Keri?”

Keri remained silent.

Her Mother tried again: “Please Sweetheart, tell me.”

Continuing to look away, Keri whispered, “Your voice hurts.”

“Oh Keri, when?”

“Spilled milk.”

Her mother frowned in silence and then asked, “Do you mean when I said, ‘Oh Keri, look what you have done?’”

Turning back to her Mother, Keri said, “Not words Mommy, voice.”

With a shock, Susan realized that she had used her own mother’s what’s-wrong-with-you voice.

She pulled her daughter into a hug and murmured, “I am sorry Keri. I am so sorry Sweetheart.”

When they had again leaned back against the pillows, Susan said, “We all make mistakes Keri, and mistakes are not wrong. Knocking over your milk was just a mistake.”

Keri tentatively asked, “Lamp?”

The only sound was the ticking of Keri’s cartoon clock, as Susan struggled with an answer.

Finally, she said, “Hitting the lamp was not wrong either, Sweetheart, but you have been told not to dance in the living room, and that was wrong. Do you understand?”

But her daughter’s head was back against the pillow, her eyes half closed.

Soon after, Susan was pacing the living room, wondering why her own mother would use that tone of voice.

She stopped, as she realized, “My mother wanted me to feel badly about what I had done; but why?”

And then she knew: “If Mom could make me feel badly enough, then maybe I would not do it again.”

Susan laughed, but it sounded bitter, as she thought, “Her voice only did half of the job. I certainly felt awful, but it did not stop me from making mistakes; it did, however, make me angry.”

At breakfast the next morning, Susan again talked with Keri about mistakes not being wrong.

Later, while making the bed, she realized, “I have been using that voice on my husband!”

A crash came from the kitchen. Susan ran and found Keri standing over a broken dinner plate; it was one of the good ones.

Looking up at her mom, Keri sounded hopeful, as she asked, “A mistake. Right Mom?”

Susan closed her mouth, stifling the witch’s voice.

She took a breath and said, “Yes Sweetheart, it was just a mistake. After we clean up, I will show you some dishes that you can play with.”

Late that evening, Susan turned off the TV for the third time, as she waited nervously for her husband. She felt excited about sharing her discovery but did not know how he would react.

Finally, she heard the grind of the garage door. As he climbed out of the car, Susan was there pulling him into a hug.

Dropping his briefcase, he said, “Wow. Did I just return from a really long trip?”

When she did not let go, he asked, “Is Keri okay?”

She smiled into his neck and said, “Keri is fine.” She added, “Everything is fine, except for that Witch’s Voice.”

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