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This is the story of desperation and greed. There once was a political party that stood for something, but over time, it allowed itself to be co-opted by the radical extremists and eventually withered into a parody of itself, running cardboard cutouts under faux-populist jingles. Time and time again, they were warned…but the Republicans never listened. Because as so often is the case, nothing speeds incompetence along its path of destruction like arrogance.

This time it’s California. But it could be Nevada. Kentucky. Or Alaska.

Running for US Senate in California, Republican Carly Fiorina has been touting her “executive” experience (thank you Sarah Palin) as CEO of Hewlett-Packard. Her campaign bio makes her sound like she whipped that place into shape, managed a mega-merger with Compaq and helmed the “reinvention” of the company. You remember Carly, she of the infamous, “There is no job that is America’s God-given right anymore. We have to compete for jobs as a nation.” Aimed as this comment was at the tech sector jobs sprinting over-seas, this statement probably didn’t go over well with Silicon Valley or for that matter, the runaway production obsessed entertainment industry in California.

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But wait, it gets worse; behind the business leader façade of this Mama Grizzly pick we find some rather unpleasant facts. Carly was fired from Hewlett-Packard. How does that fit into “executive experience”? I guess as well as being mayor of a small town and having a recall campaign initiated against you almost immediately after you ask for resignations from all city employees in order to test their loyalty. In other words, normal people might not run around talking up their great executive experience if they had been fired. They might, oh, I dunno…. be embarrassed. Or shamed.

Like normal people.

But the Republican Party isn’t churning out normal people this year, is it?

Campaign finance records reveal that Hewlett-Packard is giving substantially more money to Carly Fiorina’s opponent, liberal Democrat Barbara Boxer, than to former CEO Carly. It seems the good old boys who backed Carly were warned by one Ms Packard, grand-daughter of the founder of Hewlett-Packard…. but Senators Inhofe, Coburn and Kyl figured they knew best.

I think you know where this is going.



Red State reported Packard’s letter to Republican senators warning them about Carly Fiorina:

“I know a little bit about Carly Fiorina, having watched her almost destroy the company my grandfather founded. So, allow me to disillusion you of a few of your stated reasons for supporting her.”

She then goes on to detail Carly’s turn at the wheel and it’s not pretty.

“Senator Inhofe, like the global warming fear mongers you so admirably excoriate, you are taking action without verifying the facts. The only explanation that comes to mind for this is the fact that your nephew works for Fiorina’s campaign. At a minimum, this conflict should be disclosed before you ask the voters of California to take your word that Ms. Fiorina is the conservative she claims to be.”



Uh-oh…I sense another non-vetted Mama Grizzly coming to bite the GOP in their hinny…..

“You write that she is a “proven business leader.” This may be how she spins her career, but most business commentators consider Fiorina’s tenure at HP to be a disaster. The stock price dropped by 50% only to rally 10% on the announcement of her firing. She fired 28,000 people before she herself was fired, departing with the 21 million dollar golden parachute that is financing her campaign –”

Whoa, this is sounding so familiar. Can you say I quit for a legal defense fund? I know you can! Try it super fast. And for fun, add on, now I’m a reality TV star! Golden parachute “Country First!” Hey, did we ever find out what happened to those clothes? CREW says the RNC never got back to them….

Oh, and just to be sure, I double checked Ms Packard (see, some of us do vet) and CNN concurs with her assessment of the stock price jump being a reflection of Carly’s departure:

“Shares of HP (Research) jumped 6.9 percent in heavy trading on the New York Stock Exchange Wednesday on the news. But at one point, the stock was up as much as 10.5 percent. “The stock is up a bit on the fact that nobody liked Carly’s leadership all that much,” said Robert Cihra, an analyst with Fulcrum Global Partners. “The Street had lost all faith in her and the market’s hope is that anyone will be better.””

Yikes. Ok, boys, that was googleable. But hey, everyone has a history. And Ms Packard clearly has a personal stake in this, so grain of salt and all….

Ms Packard continues:

“—Thankfully, HP survived Fiorina and is again a flourishing company. This is largely due to the leadership of Mark Hurd, the man who replaced her. Prior to HP, she escaped from Lucent (where she ran their largest division) in the nick of time, leaving months before problems became evident—“

Who can forget the nightmare plunge of LU, as Americans’ retirement funds hung in the balance, teetering drunkenly over the precipice?

“—Eventually leading to Lucent and nine executives being charged with securities law violations.”

Oh, god. Déjà vu!

And explaining to the big boys just how reality works, Ms Packard informs them of a few things they should have known before backing Carly. And maybe now we realize that even though she has a personal agenda, Ms Packard makes some mighty good points. Just picture their faces as she explains to them that the Democrats don’t “fear” Carly…is that ringing any bells for ya’?

“You say that Democrats fear Fiorina and use her name in fundraising. There is another explanation: her name is widely reviled in California – invoking her paints all Republicans as greedy out of touch CEOs. That is why Boxer uses her name as a fundraising tool.”

Er, oh. OUCH. Jiminy. Say it ain’t so, Joe! Gosh, I remember how much money the Democrats raised when Palin reared her mean-girl contempt at the RNC. Thank you, Sarah Palin.

And speaking of Sarah Palin, unvetted candidates, the GOP running women as Mama Grizzlies with executive experience, and lots of unaccounted for clothes…..

“All of this might be forgivable if Ms Fiorina had the proven record of conservatism on the issues that you attribute to her. She doesn’t.”

Oh, boy. That’s kinda like running America’s Pork Queen with the Maverick who stood for hatin’ pork. Yeah, it’s sorta like calling the modern day post-Reagan Republicans conservative, with their lower taxes and spend like drunken sailors ways. I can see your hubris from my kitchen window!

Um, who is gonna tell Ms Packard that the GOP picks its candidates kind of differently than she assumes? This is no meritocracy. Please remember, Ms Packard, that in 2008, Fiorina served as a top economic advisor to Republican presidential candidate John McCain, and I think you will start to understand Sister Sarah’s endorsement of this Mama Grizzly.

Ms Packard then goes on to list Fiorina’s positions, which are the…well, exact opposite of things she as advocated for in the past. Kinda like a certain pitbull we all know.

See, boys, it’s not enough that y’all find some woman and shove her in front of us and tell us she’s a Mama Grizzly with executive experience. Really. Because the thing is, most of us girls, we do our homework. We’ve had to, in order to survive. We haven’t been able to skate by on our privilege and entitlement. Just sayin’. And here’s one last little tip: when Carly Fiornia got busted mocking Barbara Boxer’s hair on an open mic, it only brought back memories of Hillary hair hitmen and somehow, boys, this does not scream feminism or Mama Grizzly to me.

Take a clue from Ms Packard and try vetting your candidates. Try nominating candidates who actually stand for something. Try not lying to us quite so obviously. And try to keep the condescension down.

It isn’t lost on me that you boys dismissed Ms Packard’s clear warning, while running all of these Pink Elephants under the banner of feminism. Let me guess. Maybe the boys assumed Ms Packard had “her claws out”? Yeah.

Lovin’ me that modern day GOP feminism.