Hi there, we really hope you and your child enjoyed reading Oat the Goat.

We wrote this story because while children learn to get along with each other from a really young age, sometimes they need a little guidance from you. And Oat the Goat’s a fun way for you and your child to spend time together learning about the power of kindness.

Kindness is the exact opposite of bullying. Being bullied is awful, especially for kids, so it’s important you know what it is so you can look out for it. Bullying is unwanted and repeated behaviour by someone who uses their power to hurt another person (or people) on purpose. It’s a pretty stink situation.

Young children’s bullying often looks different from older kids’. Young kids experiment with different ways of behaving and sometimes this can look like bullying. They could say mean things, grab stuff, pull a funny face, push people or refuse to play with someone. While upsetting, this isn’t really bullying because it isn’t done on purpose to keep hurting another child. But, if they’re allowed to keep going, it could turn into a pattern of bullying.

The good news is that it’s easier to stop your child doing all that yucky stuff when they’re young. Young children usually change their behaviour depending on how their friends, parents, whānau, or teachers react. So now’s the time to help them learn how to be kind.

Reading Oat the Goat will help you talk to your child about making choices – should they laugh at someone? Ignore them? Stand up to them? Or include and be kind to them?

Oat the Goat shows that being kind always wins in the end. And that’s what we all want right?

Here’s some more tips to help you teach your child how to get on with people and talk about their feelings.

Talk to your child about things other people do and how they might feel.

Talk about and practise taking turns, sharing, helping, and looking after others to build positive behaviour.

Praise your child when you notice them making an effort to get on with other children. Help boost their kind behaviour with heaps of positive words. Eg. “Sharing the toy was very kind of you, Matu. Nice one.”

Being kind feels good! Recognise how it makes your child feel, e.g. “I can see it made you happy to let Pania join in.”

Chat about how their own experiences are like the characters in Oat the Goat. When children read stories that reflect the diverse world that they live in, they’re less likely to bully those who are different from them. Ask questions like: “Have you ever felt like little green glow worm? Or the sheep? How did it make you feel? What did you do? And what do you think you could do differently next time?” This can help young children practise what they might do in a real-life situation.

Point out the positive behaviour in Oat the Goat, as well as the bad behaviour, and relate that to your life. For instance, can your child think of a time when they included someone in a game, just like when Oat the Goat was kind and said “Come hang with us, little worm.”

Talk about how everyone is different and how that’s great, since our differences make us special. Your child will get on with other kids better when they understand, appreciate and respect them.

Be a positive role model of what you would like your child to do.

Read the book over and over again. Learning new things takes time and lots of practice so try to share at least one story book moment with your child every day.

More Information

What to do if you need more support and want to talk to someone about bullying

If your child is experiencing bullying behaviour at school, contact your school about it.

Tips about how to talk to your school

Bullying Free NZ website

For more fun activities

Frequently asked questions