For the past five to six years Dez Reed and Charmaine Panko have been living with 20 other people — all of whom live in Reed's mind.

Panko, who is Reed's wife of 20 years, was the first to notice changes in her husband. She remembers the exact moment the couple came across the term dissociative identity disorder (DID).

It's a lot like being married to a carnival. - Charmaine Panko

After searching online for a reason behind her husband's sudden change in behaviour — suicidal thoughts, sudden mood changes and wanting to live as a woman — she found an answer.

"I pressed enter and all of a sudden every entry had dissociative identity disorder, and I had never heard of the term before," she said. "It was like someone had been writing about our lives in the various different posts I was reading."

Reed calls his personalities his alters, and they all range in age, gender, ethnicity and sexuality. The first alter that Panko met was a six-year-old girl, who has since grown up and matured.

"Mirrors are our enemy. You see them and you get startled by what's looking back at you," said Reed. "It's not always what you're expecting."

Dr. Colin Ross, a psychiatrist and author who specializes in dissociative identity disorder, said that, although he cannot make a diagnoses from afar, it does sound like Reed suffers from DID.

"These are genuine psychological experiences," he said.

The roots of DID, he said, can be found in trauma.

"It's too much to deal with so your mind breaks it into bits and pieces."

In sickness and in health

The couple believes the DID is linked to trauma experienced in Reed's youth.

"I didn't talk to anyone about what happened to me. But I knew I had to tell Charmaine because I was going to lose my wife, lose my family," said Reed.

Reed's personality switches are often triggered by strong emotions.

"It's a lot like being married to a carnival, because you're not entirely sure what ride you're on, on any given day," said Panko.

Reed says the several 'alters' he has differ in almost every conceivable aspect. (Submitted by Charmaine Panko) She said the experience has been exhilarating.

"I love Dez as a whole, with all his parts equally," she said, even though not all of her husband's alters loved her. In fact she felt some were intensely jealous of her, while others were extremely affectionate.

The couple has 11 children spanning their two decades of marriage. When Reed was diagnosed they spoke with their older children and explained what was happening.

"They all just went, 'Yeah, that makes sense.' To them they could totally understand it," said Panko.

One man writing room

Reed has been a comedian and performer for as long as Panko has known him. After his diagnosis Reed continued to perform and do stand-up around Saskatoon. But now, with his alters, Reed found a whole source of creativity and inspiration.

"Good comedy has writing teams. You couldn't imagine South Park, it couldn't be South Park without Matt (Stone) and Trey (Parker) working on it together," said Reed. "They have a writing room. I have a writing room."

The alters come out on stage and can coach and help him through rough patches. "I love to make people laugh, because I know how important laughter is. Laughter has kept me alive for sure," said Reed.

"It's the best sound in the world."