Fed up with the outrageous task of having to sign his name over and over again every time he moved, Jared Hyams wanted to see if it even mattered what he put in the little box on the form, so he drew a straight line. What happened was nothing. Believing this meant he could put whatever the hell he wanted in the box, Hyams started drawing a tiny penis any time a form asked for his signature. Shockingly, people noticed.

Jared Hyams

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At least they couldn't accuse him of overcompensating for anything.

The Australian Electoral Commission told Hyams that the drawings didn't count as a legal signature, but he refused to take no for an answer, and continued forcefully using his little dick art in lieu of his name. Hyams was convinced he was in the right, seeing as how he got away with using a straight line previously.

Hyams started using the image for everything, frequently butting heads with the AEC over whether the doodles could be legally recognized as a signature. Hyams was shot down every time, and every time he came away more bullheaded than ever, still convinced that the government had no right to tell him what the visualization of "Jared Hyams" could look like. When Hyams went to have his driver's license signature switched to his new, Prince-like-but-dickish symbol, he noticed his updated card never arrived in the post. He investigated and was informed that the address on file didn't match his current home. Hyams was convinced that the address was intentionally changed to prevent him from ever receiving the license, because that's a totally sane and rational explanation. Really, officials were just nervous that the dong sketch would be too easy to replicate, allowing any Tom, Dick, or Harry to jack Hyams' identity.