BRUSSELS—Representatives of the 192 remaining U.N. member states have expelled the U.S. delegation following the country's appearance last week in a compromising nine-minute video on the popular website YouTube. "These images of the United States indulging in irresponsible, lewd, and perhaps intoxicated behavior present sufficient grounds to revoke its seat in the General Assembly," Secretary-General Ban Ki-moon announced Sunday, describing the clip as "appalling" and "distasteful by any standard of human decency." "We may in the future consider membership on a strictly probationary basis if the U.S. can mature and make significant strides toward civilization." In the spirit of full disclosure, Ban admitted he did smirk a bit during the drunken stapler fight.

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