ILA SOLOMON ONCE LEFT HER HUSBAND, GERALD “SCOOTER” GAVAN, LYING DEAD IN HER HOUSE FOR AT LEAST NINE MONTHS. DURING THIS DURATION SHE COLLECTED HIS BENEFITS AND WAS HOLDING OUT FOR HIS TRUST FUND. SHE EVEN CLAIMED SCHIZOPHRENICALLY, THAT SOME GROUP OF CONSPIRATORS WAS SPECIFICALLY TRYING TO TURN HER HUSBAND INTO A MUMMY BY BREAKING INTO HER HOUSE AND SECRETLY INSTALLING DEHUMIDIFIERS AND KEROSENE HEATERS TO SPEED UP THE PROCESS.

SHE POSTURED, “OH, IT DEFINITELY WAS VERY FAR ALONG. SCOOTER WAS A MUMMY…THERE’S A LOT OF PEOPLE WHO KNOW HOW TO MAKE A MUMMY.”

SHE EXEMPLIFIES THAT THINGS ARE OUT OF HER CONTROL AND MAYBE SO. SHE IS SUBJECT TO AN ONGOING TRIAL FOR NINE CRIMINAL CHARGES AND WILL BE SENTENCED TO AT LEAST ONE OF THESE CHARGES ON DECEMBER 21, 2015, AFTER PLEADING GUILTY EARLY IN NOVEMBER.

NOW A NEW SCANDAL AND PLEA FOR ATTENTION HAS ARISEN.

OFFICER CHAPMAN FROM THE LAFAYETTE POLICE DEPARTMENT ISSUED A CITATION FOR GRAFFITI TO THE SPOT TAVERN ON THE EVENING OF MONDAY NOVEMBER 16TH. THE ISSUE WAS RELATED TO A PORTION OF ART CREATED BY THE DROOPS THIS SUMMER WHICH WAS COMMISSIONED AND PAID FOR BY THE OWNER OF THE SPOT TAVERN, PAUL BALDWIN. ARTICLE (B) AND (C) OF THIS CITATION STATES; THE NEED TO REMOVE SAID GRAFFITI, THE DEADLINE, POSSIBLE FINES, WHO TO ASK FOR IN NEED OF HELP, AND THE AUTHORIZATION OF THE LOCAL GOVERNMENT TO REMOVE IT THEMSELVES IF NOT COMPLETED BY THE OWNER.

PECULIARLY, ARTICLE (A) WAS MISSING FROM THE CITATION. THE EMPLOYEES OF THE SPOT TAVERN AND THE DROOPS CONGREGATED ON SOCIAL MEDIA TO DISCUSS THIS SITUATION AND THRU RESEARCH COMPLETED BY THESE PARTIES THEY DISCOVERED ARTICLE (A) OF THE CITATION…

ARTICLE (A) STATES: DEFINITION. THE TERM ‘GRAFFITI’ FOR PURPOSES OF THIS SECTION, SHALL MEAN ANY UNAUTHORIZED INSCRIPTION OR REPRESENTATION ON A BUILDING, STRUCTURE, WALL, SIGN, FENCE, SIDEWALK, PAVEMENT….

THE FACT THAT THIS ART WAS COMMISSIONED SPEAKS ENOUGH THAT IT IS NOT GRAFFITI.

ALSO, WHY WAS ARTICLE (A) AVOIDED ON THE CITATION, AND BETTER YET, WHY WAS THIS MISINFORMED CITATION EVEN ISSUED IN THE FIRST PLACE?

OUR CORPSE KEEPING ILA SOLOMON HAS SOMETHING TO DO WITH IT. SHE STARTED A PETITION FOR THE REMOVAL OF THE ‘ADULT ART’ OFF OF THE SPOT TAVERN’S WALL IN AN ACT OF ASSUMED PIETY. WHICH SOME MAY BELIEVE IS AN ATTEMPT TO MISPLACE AND PROJECT HER FEELINGS OF GUILT THRU MEANS SHE HAS AT HER DISPOSAL; SUCH AS ATTACKING THE SPOT TAVERN’S CREATIVE EXPRESSION. HER FLIPPANT EXPLANATION OF THE TRUTH IS EVIDENT, AT LEAST, IN HER DECISION TO CHANGE HER PLEA OF NOT GUILTY TO GUILTY IN THE CASE OF HER FAILURE TO REPORT A DEAD BODY, IF NOT ALSO APPARENT IN THE SMUDGED HISTORY OF HER PAST MARRIAGES. SHOULD THIS INDIVIDUAL REALLY BE PLACED IN A POSITION TO DICTATE WHAT IS ACCEPTABLE AS ART IN OUR COMMUNITY?

ZECHARIAH BAUMHOVER