It's funny how there are stages throughout the evolution of a stoner (well atleast this applies to me and others I've noticed):

Stage 1 (aka The Newb):

-Smokes very little or is just starting out

-No ability to communicate with the outside world (even amongst themselves)

-Ability to get uber stoned off of one hit of weed that is similar to the "Snicklefritz" on Pineapple Express

-Never pays for shit

-Smokes out of pop cans at the local elementary playground (or if higher stage stoner is present; out of their piece)

-Has no connections to any weed source

-Are more paranoid then a lesbian in a room full of guidos (when it comes to smokin or being caught)

-Basically these people are like Squeak from the movie "Basketball" (If you haven't seen it get off ur ass and go rent it...... now.....yes you!)

-If I had to compare this group to a character on Star Wars it would be the Ewoks (the cute little bears that kicked some ass). At first they are cute and you accept them, but after awhile they just get so fucking annoying. But, you'd rather hangout with them then a stormtrooper.

Stage 2 (aka the poser):

-Smoke a few times a week

-Is more tolerant to weed but still gets Helen Keller wit it after taking 1 to 2 hits of the Super Chronic

-still can't communicate with the outside world but are able to bond with each other

-Has a friend who has a friend that is a dealer

-Venturing into the local smoke shop (aka The Water Hole) for the first time occurs here. Usually trying to pretend they know their shit, but when talking to the much more evolved stoner has no clue what the hell he is talking about. (Due to advanced smoking mumbo jumbo/terminology)

-Some take the risk of buying their first piece, sadly some get caught (parents)

-The pussies of the "posers" stick to aluminum cans, but also learn to make other dispoable smoking tools such as the SOBE bottle, the Apple, and yes the tin foil pipe. Surprisingly some, the douches of the pussies, still manage to get caught.

-They learn the skills to roll their own blunts/joints but blow at it. Kind of similar to old people and driving. They know how to do it but they fucking suck at it.

-If I had to compare this group to a character in Star Wars it would be Chewbacca. They try to have an impact, bless their hearts, but they are fucking useless. Extremely annoying, won't shut the fuck up.

Stage 3 (aka The Stoner/Pot head):

-Contains most of the smoking community, because individuals in the Newb & Posers group only count as like 1/2 of a stoner

-Always has weed on them and usually ends up smoking out everyone in the damn party

-Smokes almost daily

-High Tolerence to all weed

-Can function in front of anyone and communication is a breeze

-Have Epic bonding sessions

-Knows what a spoon, sidecar, and hammer are

-Fully fluent in Weedglish

-Has multiple pieces including other contraptions such as the bong, the zong, vap, volcano, gas mask, and the hookah. ***The most imporat part: they actually know and can handle taking rips out of these tools

-This is where the brave few venture off into the arts of pot dealing. Sadly some are caught by the law, but their courage is respected by all those in the community.

-For the vast majority that avoid dealing, they have a direct connection to a dealer who "Hooks them Up," or so they think.... better weigh that baggy again :) jp.

-For most of these "pot heads" the public is very aware of their social status.

-Being caught is not a concern... we don't give a fuck

-Hobbies include: chillin.... thats it

-This is where their smoking abilities/powers (such as noticing other high people, rolling blunts/joints, and highdeas) are becoming stronger

-If I had to compare this group to a Star Wars Character it would be the Jedi. Definately have an advantage of the rest of society, and are tight as shit.

Stage 4 (aka The Juggernaut)

-Smokes multiple times a day

-Very Very tolerant to weed

-Always Smokin the Dank shit

-They truely live the marijuana lifestyle and its deeply rooted in their hearts. They stand up for its cause in front of the whole public

-have back up blunts for their backup blunts

-have pre and post wake n bake sessions

-Have so much ganja memorabilia it makes people who used to collect sports cards say "What The Fuck"

-Have multiple pipes, bongs, bubblers ect.

-Their knowledge far exceeds that of general society.

-Extremely deep and spiritual smoke sessions with the bromies.

-Can literally smell weed from a mile away.

-Have mastered all smoking abilities/powers

-Many in this group grow their own supply

-Have been smoking for decades

-Never get caught as they are very smart!

-Fucntions above the abilites of the general society when out in the public

-Has developed a Permanent mono-tone voice

-If I had to compare this group to a star wars character it would be the Master Jedi (like Luke Skywalker or Obi Wan Kenobi). Everyone knows them and respects them. They fuck shit up! They are the elite of the elite.

Stage 5 (aka The Omnipresent):

-They are everywhere at everytime... they are watching you! :0

-Are Always High

-Same Characteristics as the Juggernuats but their abilities make the Juggernuats look like Jabba the Hutt.

-Their knowledge is beyond capabilities of anyone else being able to understand

-Little is known about the Omnipresent as very few have reached this level and their secrets die with them but their spirits still guide the community

-If I had compare this group to a Star Wars character it would be Yoda. Nobody can touch them.

I wonder what we'll evolve into next... maybe be so advanced that our body will eventually produce it's own THC, but I know We'd all still be lightin hella blunts haha.

I'm prolly between a 3 and 3.5 but hopefully someday reach the next level :)

CLAIMER: I'm not hating on the first couple of stages as we have all been there before, Rather just poking mere fun at their developing stages of weedhood. Kinda of like how we still make fun of older kids that wet the bed.... ("I don't want to sleep on the hide-a bed with Fuller. If he has something to drink, he'll wet the bed."- Kevin... Home Alone).

Smoke On :)-~