[6:02 AM] cloppyhooves: you are eating dinner with waifu and waifuparents

[6:02 AM] cloppyhooves: what do

[6:03 AM] tsiugnil_possibly_napping: i'm just saying, her tail might end up looking like a giant turd if you aren't careful

[6:03 AM] plotospex: Don't blast anything with piss this time

[6:03 AM] reahidru: Order a salad

[6:03 AM] reahidru: Attempt small talk

[6:04 AM] cloppyhooves: Small talk successful

[6:04 AM] cloppyhooves: Suddenly something you're eating tastes like waifu

[6:04 AM] cloppyhooves: you now have a boner

[6:04 AM] cloppyhooves: what do

[6:04 AM] reahidru: Tastes like ... her skin?

[6:04 AM] reahidru: Or her *juices*

[6:04 AM] reahidru: Or what

[6:04 AM] cloppyhooves: juices, of course

[6:04 AM] equius_zahhak: ignore boner, it's under the table, shouldn't be a problem

[6:05 AM] reahidru: Attempt to ignore boner

[6:05 AM] rozzak: daww

[6:05 AM] reahidru: ==>

[6:06 AM] equius_zahhak: D-->

[6:06 AM] cloppyhooves: you attempt to ignore boner

[6:06 AM] cloppyhooves: but somehow waifu knows

[6:06 AM] cloppyhooves: she looks at you with seductive eyes for a second before resuming eating

[6:06 AM] cloppyhooves: what do

[6:06 AM] reahidru: Place waifu's hoof on crotch

[6:07 AM] reahidru: Subtly

[6:07 AM] equius_zahhak: brush against her flank with GROTESQUE PONY HANDS

[6:07 AM] reahidru: Are we human or pony?

[6:07 AM] reahidru: This is important

[6:07 AM] cloppyhooves: Let's say pony for now

[6:07 AM] cloppyhooves: unless you want to be hooman

[6:08 AM] reahidru: Let's go pony I guess

[6:08 AM] equius_zahhak: i'm ok with Ponyself

[6:08 AM] cloppyhooves: waifu's hoof is on crotch

[6:08 AM] cloppyhooves: she gasps, but resumes eating

[6:08 AM] reahidru: Keep making smalltalk

[6:08 AM] cloppyhooves: and also beings rubbing hoof in circles on crotch

[6:08 AM] cloppyhooves: what do

[6:08 AM] plotospex: Hoof on waifu's crotch, gogogo

[6:08 AM] cloppyhooves: hoof on waifu's crotch too

[6:09 AM] cloppyhooves: also circles

[6:09 AM] cloppyhooves: parents are wondering why you guys are starting to breath a little irregularly

[6:09 AM] cloppyhooves: what do

[6:09 AM] reahidru: Check to see if Waifu is blushing too much

[6:09 AM] equius_zahhak: make silly comment on spicey food

[6:09 AM] reahidru: ^^GENIUS

[6:09 AM] reahidru: Except you ordered a salad...

[6:10 AM] cloppyhooves: you comment on the fact that you shouldn't have ordered the hot pepper salad

[6:10 AM] cloppyhooves: and that waifu shouldn't have tried it either

[6:10 AM] cloppyhooves: they seem contented enough

[6:10 AM] cloppyhooves: still rubbing

[6:10 AM] guest-3570 entered the room.

[6:10 AM] cloppyhooves: pleasure building

[6:10 AM] cloppyhooves: what do

[6:10 AM] plotospex: Rub harder, there is no way this can end poorly

[6:10 AM] guest-3570 changed nickname to rarity_times_two

[6:10 AM] equius_zahhak: pretend to whisper to waifu, lick her ear

[6:10 AM] reahidru: Kiss waifu on cheek casually

[6:11 AM] reahidru: Ooh no, that

[6:11 AM] reahidru: ^^

[6:11 AM] cloppyhooves: you lean in close to waifu and lick her ear

[6:11 AM] cloppyhooves: she shudders

[6:11 AM] rarity_times_two: (hello ponies)

[6:11 AM] equius_zahhak: hey

[6:11 AM] cloppyhooves: in retaliation, he begins rubbing harder

[6:11 AM] plotospex: (Hey RarityPony)

[6:11 AM] cloppyhooves: and of course, so do you

[6:11 AM] cloppyhooves: you both seem to be squirming in your seat

[6:11 AM] tsiugnil_possibly_napping: hola

[6:11 AM] cloppyhooves: parents ask if something's wrong

[6:11 AM] tsiugnil_possibly_napping: [falling asleep]

[6:11 AM] cloppyhooves: what do

[6:11 AM] cloppyhooves: (also, hello)

[6:12 AM] plotospex: Are we sitting across from parents?

[6:12 AM] plotospex: We don't want them to get covered in ponyjizz

[6:12 AM] reahidru: Excuse yourself to Stallion's room

[6:12 AM] reahidru: And hope waifu follows

[6:12 AM] equius_zahhak: gesture to waifu to follow while doing so

[6:12 AM] plotospex: Is there any way to do that without our horseboner being noticed?

[6:13 AM] cloppyhooves: your horseboner is quite evident

[6:13 AM] equius_zahhak: just a nod of the head with a wink should do

[6:13 AM] cloppyhooves: if you get up it is likely to be seen

[6:13 AM] reahidru: Examinie horse clothes if any

[6:13 AM] cloppyhooves: you are not wearing horse clothes

[6:13 AM] cloppyhooves: this was a casual dinner

[6:13 AM] reahidru: Damn

[6:14 AM] reahidru: discreetly Spill some dressing onto boner

[6:14 AM] equius_zahhak: drop fork, lick waifus inner flank while picking it up

[6:14 AM] plotospex: ^

[6:14 AM] cloppyhooves: to answer plotospex's question: waifu is to right, dad is across, mom is to left

[6:14 AM] plotospex: Okay, so if we /horsejizz we can try to pin it on the dad

[6:14 AM] plotospex: Good

[6:14 AM] reahidru: This won't end well

[6:14 AM] cloppyhooves: you make a show of dropping your fork

[6:15 AM] cloppyhooves: you go under the table to pick it up, and as you do, you make a loving lick on waifu's

[6:15 AM] cloppyhooves: inner flank

[6:15 AM] cloppyhooves: she gasps again and sits up straight in her chair

[6:15 AM] cloppyhooves: you reemerge from under the table

[6:15 AM] cloppyhooves: parents now have concerned looks

[6:15 AM] cloppyhooves: what do

[6:16 AM] cloppyhooves: (waifu resumes rubbing you)

[6:16 AM] equius_zahhak: "sorry 'bout that luv, clammy hooves"

[6:16 AM] equius_zahhak: /shrug

[6:17 AM] reahidru: "Sorry, did I poke your leg?"

[6:17 AM] reahidru: /ppshrug

[6:17 AM] cloppyhooves: you make a coy apology to waifu and reenact the shrung that's never actually seen in-show

[6:17 AM] cloppyhooves: parents are a little confused

[6:18 AM] cloppyhooves: you resume rubbing waifu

[6:18 AM] cloppyhooves: what do

[6:18 AM] reahidru: Take ice cube from drink

[6:18 AM] cloppyhooves: (the pleasure is getting higher and higher)

[6:18 AM] equius_zahhak: ask Waifu's parents how they met, hope they get engrosed in storytelling

[6:18 AM] plotospex: Angle horsepenis so that the tip is rubbing waifuleg

[6:20 AM] cloppyhooves: you ask parents how they met

[6:20 AM] cloppyhooves: the look at each other in a loving smile, and the dad begins to tell a story

[6:20 AM] reahidru: ^while stealthily removing an ice cube

[6:20 AM] cloppyhooves: meanwhile, with your other hoof, you use one hoof to grab an ice cube while using the

[6:21 AM] cloppyhooves: other to stop rubbing and place horsedong on waifu's leg

[6:21 AM] cloppyhooves: what do

[6:21 AM] cloppyhooves: (your horsedongle is starting to quiver)

[6:21 AM] reahidru: Place ice cube on Waifu's knee and slooowwly drag it up her flank

[6:23 AM] cloppyhooves: since waifu is now holding dong on her leg, you use that hoof to slowly slide it up her

[6:23 AM] cloppyhooves: leg, all the way to her flank

[6:23 AM] cloppyhooves: she shivers continually as you do this, partially out of pleasure and partially from the c

[6:23 AM] cloppyhooves: cold

[6:23 AM] cloppyhooves: the dad stops speaking for a moment and asks if everything is alright

[6:23 AM] cloppyhooves: what do

[6:24 AM] reahidru: Laugh and say you must have had too much to drink

[6:24 AM] reahidru: And that you're a little tipsy

[6:24 AM] tsiugnil_possibly_napping: [does everyone know how not fun sleep paralysis is?]

[6:24 AM] equius_zahhak: "Darling you look cold, come here sit on my knee"

[6:24 AM] equius_zahhak: i've no experience with it but i know about it

[6:25 AM] reahidru: ^Oh yeah, you're Mr Smooth

[6:25 AM] cloppyhooves: you mention that your waifu looks cold, and tell her to sit on your knee

[6:25 AM] cloppyhooves: the dad begins to speak again

[6:25 AM] reahidru: /facehoof

[6:25 AM] cloppyhooves: how position waifu on lap, how position horsedong, what do

[6:25 AM] plotospex: Waifu on right leg

[6:26 AM] plotospex: Horsedong between waifulegs

[6:26 AM] tsiugnil_possibly_napping: i managed to fall asleep for a short amt of time just now and had sleep parallysis

[6:26 AM] tsiugnil_possibly_napping: it was unwelcome

[6:26 AM] equius_zahhak: you were being sarcastic right reahidru?

[6:27 AM] reahidru: Yeah a little

[6:27 AM] reahidru: Whisper for her to stroke you under the table with both hoofs

[6:27 AM] equius_zahhak: nibble ear before you pull away

[6:27 AM] cloppyhooves: you position waifu on right leg, horsedong between her legs

[6:27 AM] cloppyhooves: you whisper to her and nibble on her ear a bit

[6:27 AM] rozzak: I AM SOO LAZY I CANT FINISH!

[6:27 AM] cloppyhooves: she brings her hooves below the table and starts rubbing the tip of horsedong

[6:27 AM] reahidru: Fix them lips Roz

[6:28 AM] cloppyhooves: while shifting herself so she is now rubbing herself against base of horsedog

[6:28 AM] cloppyhooves: *horsedong

[6:28 AM] cloppyhooves: the pleasure is beginning to become unbearable

[6:28 AM] cloppyhooves: what do

[6:28 AM] reahidru: Aw sweet, we're hot doggin' it

[6:28 AM] equius_zahhak: massage crotchboobs

[6:28 AM] tsiugnil changed nickname to tsiugnil_possibly_napping

[6:29 AM] reahidru: Make sure parents aren't freaking out

[6:29 AM] tsiugnil_possibly_napping: rozzak, why did you erase her hair?

[6:30 AM] plotospex: Both of these are probably good ideas

[6:30 AM] reahidru: Do both at once

[6:31 AM] cloppyhooves: you begin massaging your waifu's crotchboobs

[6:32 AM] cloppyhooves: you hear her breathing start to go erratic, but she does so subtly enough so only you can

[6:32 AM] cloppyhooves: hear

[6:32 AM] cloppyhooves: you look at her parents

[6:32 AM] cloppyhooves: the dad is still speaking, the mother seems happy that you two are so close and loving

[6:32 AM] cloppyhooves: (without suspecting anything, of course)

[6:32 AM] cloppyhooves: you feel a pressure building in your loins

[6:32 AM] cloppyhooves: what do

[6:33 AM] reahidru: Start moving your hips a little

[6:33 AM] plotospex: Yes

[6:33 AM] cloppyhooves: you move your hips too

[6:33 AM] equius_zahhak: "Mind scooting a bit to the side luv, i'm getting a cramp" use movement to insert

[6:33 AM] plotospex: Wait

[6:33 AM] cloppyhooves: or

[6:33 AM] cloppyhooves: waiting

[6:33 AM] plotospex: Make sure we don't end up blasting horsejizz directly into the air where everypony can see

[6:34 AM] reahidru: No, do exactly that

[6:34 AM] plotospex: Alright, let's do exactly that

[6:34 AM] reahidru: Then complain that you didn't order a Ceasaer salad

[6:34 AM] plotospex: See if you can aim so it lands in Waifufood

[6:34 AM] reahidru: Everypony llaughs

[6:35 AM] reahidru: *note, don't actually do this

[6:35 AM] cloppyhooves: (don't?)

[6:35 AM] reahidru: Or do I guess

[6:35 AM] reahidru: I was being silly

[6:35 AM] reahidru: But uhh'

[6:35 AM] plotospex: Wink at waifu and nudge her to lower her head

[6:36 AM] plotospex: This is in no way a bad idea

[6:36 AM] cloppyhooves: (I don't understand)

[6:36 AM] reahidru: Flip table over onto parents, start fucking like crazy

[6:36 AM] equius_zahhak: lol

[6:36 AM] reahidru: Use horsedong to flip table

[6:36 AM] plotospex: (The idea being a ponyblowjob)

[6:37 AM] plotospex: (A very quick one, of course)

[6:37 AM] cloppyhooves: (too many good ideas; can't pick just one)

[6:37 AM] equius_zahhak: drop spoon and ask waifu for "help"

[6:37 AM] reahidru: Tell us where we are right now

[6:37 AM] cloppyhooves: You are sitting at the table, waifu sitting on boner

[6:37 AM] cloppyhooves: waifu's dad is across from you

[6:38 AM] cloppyhooves: waifu's mom is on your left

[6:38 AM] cloppyhooves: Waifu seems close to orgasm

[6:38 AM] cloppyhooves: You feel yourself very close to orgasm

[6:40 AM] cloppyhooves: you drop your spoon once again

[6:40 AM] cloppyhooves: waifu says "Don't worry, I've got it"

[6:40 AM] reahidru: (yay)

[6:40 AM] cloppyhooves: She leans down and begins sucking your horseboner

[6:40 AM] equius_zahhak: [it was a fork last time, and you call yourself a clop master? :P]

[6:40 AM] cloppyhooves: (you have multiple utensils)

[6:41 AM] cloppyhooves: (besides, what kind of pony eats a salad with a fork)

[6:41 AM] equius_zahhak: [i was refering to the "once again"]

[6:41 AM] cloppyhooves: (salad spoons are where it's at)

[6:41 AM] cloppyhooves: (oh

[6:41 AM] cloppyhooves: (shut up)

[6:41 AM] reahidru: (lol)

[6:41 AM] cloppyhooves: she also backs up her flank a bit and rubs herself against you a bit more vigorously

[6:42 AM] cloppyhooves: it is taking all of your self control not to jizz right then and there

[6:42 AM] cloppyhooves: what do

[6:42 AM] reahidru: Back up?

[6:42 AM] reahidru: Isn't she facing my horsedong?

[6:42 AM] cloppyhooves: readjusts herself

[6:42 AM] cloppyhooves: she's sitting on your lap and reaches down to blow you, I'd say that takes some readjustin

[6:42 AM] cloppyhooves: unless she's a contortioniust

[6:42 AM] reahidru: Grab her head and jizz in her mouth

[6:42 AM] plotospex: Why not jizz right then and there? It sounds like a happy thing to do

[6:43 AM] reahidru: Oh, I thought she got under the table for the SALAD SPOON

[6:43 AM] equius_zahhak: rub her clit as you jizz in hopes to get her off aswell

[6:44 AM] rozzak: ? thoughts

[6:44 AM] cloppyhooves: looks good, yo

[6:44 AM] cloppyhooves: you place one hoof on her head and sneak the other hoof against her slit

[6:44 AM] cloppyhooves: as you push down her head, you let yourself orgasm

[6:45 AM] cloppyhooves: your dong quivers and beings shooting your unborn fillies right into her mouth in powerful

[6:45 AM] cloppyhooves: spurts

[6:45 AM] cloppyhooves: she says "mmph!" for a bit as your semen fills her mouth

[6:45 AM] cloppyhooves: and the same time, you rub her clit

[6:45 AM] cloppyhooves: she says "mmph!" once again as her hips start squirming around

[6:46 AM] cloppyhooves: you feel your hoof growing wet

[6:46 AM] cloppyhooves: in fact, there's so much of waifujuices that some even gets on your waist

[6:46 AM] cloppyhooves: as you continue to feel pleasure shoot through and out of you, you continue to feel waifu

[6:47 AM] cloppyhooves: sucking every last drop

[6:47 AM] cloppyhooves: as you finish your climaz, you look up

[6:47 AM] cloppyhooves: parents seem concerned again, wondering why your had a strained look on your face

[6:47 AM] cloppyhooves: waifu swallos your ponyjizz, but some still leaks onto the floor

[6:47 AM] cloppyhooves: what do

[6:48 AM] plotospex: Tell them the fork fell on your leg, but you're okay

[6:48 AM] plotospex: And by the fork I mean the spoon

[6:48 AM] equius_zahhak: rub waifu more vigorously

[6:49 AM] equius_zahhak: say waifu accidentally nudged your "hurt leg"

[6:49 AM] equius_zahhak: while getting the spoon

[6:50 AM] cloppyhooves: you tell the parents that the fork---you mean, spoon--fell on your leg, and that waifu

[6:50 AM] cloppyhooves: also brushed against your hurt leg when getting it

[6:50 AM] cloppyhooves: at the same time, before waifu can reappear from below table, you rub her more vigorously

[6:50 AM] cloppyhooves: she begins to squirm again

[6:51 AM] cloppyhooves: you can feel her enter orgasm, and your hoof and waist are covered in still more wetness

[6:51 AM] cloppyhooves: waifu involuntarily lets out a moan from under table

[6:51 AM] cloppyhooves: what do

[6:52 AM] reahidru: "Hey, what are you doing down there sugarcube?" play it off like it wasn't a moan of

[6:52 AM] plotospex: Hug her, "Waifu, are you okay?", pretend it's a pulled muscle or something, etc

[6:52 AM] reahidru: pleasure by pretendiung it was

[6:52 AM] equius_zahhak: ask waifu in conserned voice "Are you OK" hope she can think on her feet

[6:52 AM] rozzak: Ok thats good enough

[6:53 AM] cloppyhooves: you ask waifu if she's okay

[6:53 AM] reahidru: Looks good Roz

[6:54 AM] cloppyhooves: and remind her that she shouldn't be exerting herself so much with her hurt leg

[6:54 AM] cloppyhooves: parents ask what you hurt your guys' legs doing

[6:54 AM] equius_zahhak: answer unabashedly "Sex"

[6:54 AM] cloppyhooves: you see waifu start to reemerge, but you notice that she still has some of your delicious

[6:54 AM] cloppyhooves: pony semen around her mouth

[6:54 AM] cloppyhooves: what do

[6:54 AM] equius_zahhak: then slip into kiss

[6:55 AM] plotospex: This works

[6:55 AM] rozzak: Clop to dash

[6:55 AM] rozzak: nooooow

[6:55 AM] plotospex: Okay

[6:55 AM] plotospex: (Wait, Dash has no wings)

[6:55 AM] cloppyhooves: you tell the parents "Sex" in a nonchalant manner

[6:55 AM] rozzak: SHGIT

[6:56 AM] cloppyhooves: They give you a look of "oh, you!"

[6:56 AM] rozzak: SHIT

[6:56 AM] rozzak: NO WINGS

[6:56 AM] reahidru: lol shgit

[6:56 AM] cloppyhooves: you quickly pull her into a kiss as her head reapperas

[6:56 AM] rozzak: there

[6:56 AM] equius_zahhak: ["oh you yungens and your crazy goings on"]

[6:56 AM] cloppyhooves: your can taste yourself on her

[6:56 AM] cloppyhooves: it's almost enough to get your aroused once again

[6:56 AM] cloppyhooves: what do, if anything

[6:57 AM] reahidru: Pay bill, chat to mom as you leave

[6:57 AM] equius_zahhak: happy end?

[6:57 AM] reahidru: Realize she totally knew what was happening

[6:57 AM] cloppyhooves: you pay the bill and begin talking to the mom as you get up to leave

[6:58 AM] rozzak: http://ponibooru.413chan.net/post/view/74501 This is good for me

[6:58 AM] cloppyhooves: she tells you "Yeah, it was really nice that we CAME here, wasn't it?"

[6:58 AM] rozzak: I only recently started drawing ponies

[6:58 AM] equius_zahhak: blush and nod, blush and nod...

[6:58 AM] cloppyhooves: "We'll have to COME again some time. Their food was ABSOLUTE BLISS"

[6:58 AM] reahidru: "Heh heh, yeah Mrs. Waifu"

[6:58 AM] reahidru: "heh"

[6:58 AM] plotospex: The plot twist is that WaifuMomAndDad sexed each other too!

[6:58 AM] reahidru: "heh..."

[6:59 AM] cloppyhooves: You laugh at her words and walk out of th restuarant

[6:59 AM] cloppyhooves: but as you see Waifudad pass by, you notice something seems to be dripping from between

[6:59 AM] cloppyhooves: his legs

[6:59 AM] reahidru: "Looks like you spilled some dressing sir."

[7:00 AM] cloppyhooves: You comment that he spilled dressing