WEDDINGS are all about compromise. City or country? June or November? My religion or yours?

For Chelsea Clinton, a vegetarian, it was the decision to serve meat to the guests at her July 31 wedding. (Short ribs, specifically, though there were rumors of Angus steak.)

For some couples, that is a concession too far.

“If your family loves you and wants you to have that special day, I think they can go one meal and not eat meat,” said Cecilia Kinzie, a vegan and food consultant in Petaluma, Calif., who served no meat at her 2009 wedding.

“If you go to an Indian wedding, you don’t expect Italian food,” added Ms. Kinzie, who had already appeased her family by spending her savings on a hotel reception rather than the honeymoon she’d always dreamed of. “So why should this be any different?”

As it turns out, the most political decision of Ms. Clinton’s wedding was not whether to invite James Carville. By choosing to have meat, she reignited a sensitive wedding-season debate among ethical eaters and the people who love them: To serve, or not to serve?