House-sitter’s odd note to those who live there (Picture: imgur)

This is the bizarre note a house-sitter left on the kitchen table.

The man (obviously bored) compiled a list of strange events which had apparently occurred in the homeowners’ absence.

His musings include: ‘Jumped on trampoline, bruised penis.’ And: ‘Neighbour came by, asked for soap – do not trust.’

Then he writes about an experience he had with a bird.


‘Saw a weird bird (pelican?) perched on fence. Offered to play backgammon with the bird but could not find game set. A pity!

‘Bird came back later and asked for soap. Suspect conspiracy. Will monitor more closely henceforth.’

He signs off with: ‘Welcome home. Don’t look under the back deck (noises should subside with time).’



The note was posted online by Reddit user sosomething who wrote: ‘I’m sure he was trolling us. He’s the kind of person I trust to watch over my house and my dogs while we’re out of town.

‘I talked to him while we were driving home – he didn’t mention the note but it was totally normal. I think he just left it as a joke for us to find.’