CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT

Following the newly released ‘Cabinet Files’ – based on an astonishing collection of files found in an abandoned filing cabinet in a second-hand shop in Canberra, the Labor party has been quick to steer any criticism from the young blokes that got killed filling roofs with insulation a few years back.

This means the National Broadband Network (NBN) is back in the headlines, after years of documents featuring top secret information on the internal workings of five different Australian governments were leaked to the ABC – with the most damning Turnbull related leaks related to files discussing the NBN.

Labor have today announced that they have hired Australian tennis star-turned-reality-TV-personality, Bernard Tomic to head up an independent commission aimed at counting the millions that have been spend on the copper-wire Australian internet service.

Shorten, who has been a big fan of Tomic since his spikey-hair-braces days, was asked if maybe 13-14 million dollars had been blown on the anti-climatic National Broadband Network.

“What we need is someone who can count money. Someone who knows how to count millions”

While standing next to Opposition Leader Bill Shorten today on a break from the Celebrity AU promo tour, Tomic told reporters that he was definitely the best man for the job.

“I just count money, that’s all I do”

The ever-showboating 25-year-old has made headlines quite a lot recently, after walking journalists through his vintage Mazda collection last week to show everyone how rich he is.