The reliably cynical Fox News network has been broadcasting an interview with Nolan Peterson (photo at right), a supposed security expert and confirmed bozo who has declared Paris to be dotted with “No-Go Zones” where “in just a ten-minute cab ride from the Eiffel Tower, you can be walking through streets that feel just like Baghdad.”

Baghdad, eh? How wonderful for Baghdad if their streets are also filled, as these districts are, with modern bistros, craft breweries, natural wine haunts, vegan cafés, and spots for Philly cheesesteak. Not to mention a place that ranks among the World’s 50 Best Restaurants and a bakery that won the Best Baguette in Paris competition.

Inspired by a rebuttal by Sened Dhab, we decided to plot all of the wonderful restaurants, bars and shops that fall within these unterrorized borders. They are some of the most vibrant quarters in Paris and you shouldn’t hesitate for a single moment to visit.

Our Guide to Eating & Drinking in the “No-Go Zones”

No-Go District #1: Canal St-Martin to Faubourg St. Denis

52 Rue du Faubourg St. Denis (modern French)

Bistro Bellet (modernFrench)

Vivant Cave (small plates) & Vivant Table (modern French)

Le Richer (modern French)

Albion (modern French)

Pan (Italian)

Au Comptoir de Brice (modern French)

Ratapoil du Faubourg (modern French)

Holybelly (breakfast & lunch)

Le Verre Volé (wine bar)

I Cugini (pizza)

Piccoli Cugini (pizza)

Floyd’s Bar & Grill (American)

Bob’s Juice Bar (café)

Big Fernand (burgers)

Nanashi (Japanese)

Urfa Dürüm (Kurdish sandwiches)

Sol Semilla (vegetarian health food)

The Sunken Chip (fish & chips)

La Taverne de Zhao (Chinese)

Julhès (wine shop, épicerie)

Pâtisserie Tholoniat (pastry shop)

Liberté par Benoît Castel (pastry shop)

Du Pain et des Idées (bakery)

Le Coq (cocktails)

Nearby but not technically under Sharia law:

The Beast (BBQ)

Office (modern French)

No-Go District #2: Ménilmontant

Le Chateaubriand (modern French)

Le Dauphin (wine bar)

La Fine Mousse (craft beer)

Le Perchoir (restaurant & bar)

Freddie’s Deli (sandwiches)

6036 (Japanese)

Thank You, My Deer (gluten-free)

Paris Terroirs (wine shop)

Au Nouveau Nez (wine bar)

Nearby but not technically under Sharia law:

Chatomat (modern French)

Le Baratin (classic French)

No-Go District #3: La Goutte d’Or

Brasserie de la Goutte d’Or (brewery)

Café Lomi (café)



Nearby but not technically under Sharia law:

Bob’s Bake Shop (café, hand-rolled bagels)

No-Go District #4: La Chapelle

Au Duc de la Chapelle (bakery) where Anis Bouabsa placed first and won the Best Baguette in Paris competition in 2008