This text is for 18+ readers only as it directly refers to adult sexual behaviors.

Rougher Sex

Getting a little rougher in bed….

Rougher sex can be another great way to introduce kink into your sex life. Rougher sex can mean a range of different things, so let’s start out with some basic ideas for getting rough while getting it on. Some basic starters are listed below, but feel free to communicate and experiment with what you and your partner might like or want to try out.

Scratching

If you haven’t already tried the experience of being scratched lightly down your back – it can be quite the spine-tingling sensation in all the right ways. This goes for anyone – no matter what you identify as. Let those nails grow just a little and get your claws on.

Start out with a feather-light touch when using your nails. Some individuals may have far more sensitive flesh than others – so be considerate until you discover the pressure that is perfect for pleasure.

This simple change can also be increased with the use of sharpened nail shapes. In the case of drawing blood, be sure to wash your hands before and after the play session. In addition, tend to the bloody scratches with clean clothes and warm water – coating with salve and bandages as needed.

Spanking

While spanking might be thought of as a punishment – the truth is – more people than you might think actually find spanking to be an intensely arousing experience. This isn’t to say that it still can’t be used as a sort of pleasurable or agreed upon type of punishment, of course, but this depends on your relationship dynamic. Be sure to discuss your desires and intentions before indulging in this form of play.

Spanking can be as simple as a smack on the ass with a bare hand or as complicated as picking out a selection of paddles or wide and flat whips that offer various spanking experiences. It all quite depends on how much you or your partner like the experience and what you are willing to invest in. Some varieties of paddle are studded, engraved, or shaped in different ways, and even have words on them that can leave some very fun temporary marks.

Spanking is confined to the buttocks and the upper back of the thighs. Other types of impact play target these and other zones, but for the most part, this is where spanking happens. Some notable exceptions are tit spanking (or tit slapping), pussy spanking, and spanking the inner thigh.

Slapping

Facial slaps and slaps to the breast or clitoris are another form of sensation/pain play. Definitely discuss this form of play before attempting. We are not responsible for your health if you attempt this without permission from your partner – no matter how long you’ve been together. Again, consent is of the utmost importance in sexual matters. Communicate clearly and often.

Begin with lighter strokes or light taps with your ‘toy of choice’, including bare hands, and slowly work your way up to the perfect slap. You will need to pay attention to your partner’s reactions, as they will let you know when you’ve reached the “sweet spot”, or if you’re going too hard. And as always, if your partner uses the safe word, stop immediately.

Biting

For some individuals, introducing a little nip here and there, a few nibbles, or more with your teeth might bring them even closer to the orgasmic peak. Just try not to break the flesh with biting – as the mouth has a lot of bacteria and the last thing you want is an infected wound. If you want to work up to this sensation, pinching various areas can be helpful as they are somewhat similar to tiny nips of the teeth. One can also bite using only the top row of teeth by simply pressing them into the flesh. Not as intense as a true bite, but much less likely to break skin or cause unwanted pain.

Safety Reminders

Remember to use communication while attempting to advance your sexual skills. Before jumping in, agree to use a safeword, or the green/yellow/red ‘stoplight’ system – which can even be done visually with cards if you have a thing for a full mouth.

Consent, as always, is the top priority in sexual behavior, so talk it out and make sure you have permission. Remember that the permission given can also be taken away at any time, no matter how hot and heavy things might have gotten before minds were changed. With that in mind, be sure to have fun and get sexy!