"A greyhound ought to be a dog in the state of Kansas," said Kevin Neuman, of Overland Park. Neuman and his wife, Sherri, have fostered and adopted greyhounds for 11 years. They are also active in a greyhound placement organization for retired racers. "We fell in love with the breed. They're definitely a dog . They're a great dog," Neuman said. Monday, he went to Topeka to try to change the law. The National Greyhound Association, based in Abilene, Kan., disagrees. The executive director called the change unnecessary and said greyhounds aren't bred for pets, and therefore, shouldn't fall under pet protection laws.

I know there are more pressing issues in the world than the legal designation of canines, and I'm not even an animal rights activist.

But I do consider myself a member of the "reality-based community", though... and thus I'm offended whenever I see people claiming that black is white and using the instrumentation of the law to back it up.

I'm also offended when people change legal categories to avoid laws that were designed to enforce humane treatment of animals... or prisoners.

Abraham Lincoln is reputed to have been in an argument with someone who claimed that they could be in agreement by a simple redefinition of terms. Lincoln is said to have replied, 'Look here. If you call a dog's tail a leg, how many legs would it have?' 'Why, five, then,' said the man. 'Wrong,' said President Lincoln. 'Four. You can call a dog's tail a leg, but that doesn't make it one.'

And you can say that a greyhound isn't a dog... but that doesn't make it livestock.



This is not a pipe

Perhaps they are surrealists in Kansas. When Magritte painted a pipe and titled it "This is not a pipe", he was making a comment about how a painting is not the thing it depicts.

When Kansas says that greyhounds aren't dogs, they making a comment about how they're willing to sacrifice reason to the alter of commerce: in this case, gambling revenues.

Next up: pi is actually equal to 3! Oh, I forget... it's been done already.