In 2014, a disabled woman named Stella Young took the stage at TEDx in Sydney and introduced the audience to the concept of inspiration porn. She explained that disabled people are most commonly seen only in stories and images that pornographically “objectify one group of people for the benefit of another group of people.” She had been writing and speaking about this topic for a while, exploring the various ways that disabled people were used to make other folks think mostly of themselves. For example, inspiration porn sometimes shames the viewer by showing a disabled person overcoming basic obstacles, implying that anyone less disabled has no excuse. Another variant focuses on individuals helping people with disabilities, suggesting that others should help too, centering attention on the helper, not the recipient. In all cases, disabled humans get treated as props. Stella died December quite unexpectedly, but alas, inspiration porn still dominates depictions of disability in the news, so her work continues. In the last few weeks, three stories about disability have gone viral. A high school quarterback in Pennsylvania took a girl with Down syndrome to prom, fulfilling a promise he made to her when they were in the fourth grade. A Qdoba employee in Kentucky was filmed feeding a customer with physical disabilities. Madeline Stuart, an Australian woman with Down syndrome, lost weight and became a model. Each of these stories has been reproduced on news outlets and shared on social media around the world in multiple languages. They all feature people doing good things. There’s nothing necessarily wrong with the content of these stories, of course, but the way they’re told conceals the real issues faced by the disability community. We need stories that illuminate instead.

Hero quarterback

The quarterback story is just a recent example of the kind of tale that goes viral during every prom and graduation season. Ben Moser and Mary Lapkowicz knew each other in elementary school. In fourth grade, he promised to take her to prom. Eight years later, despite not attending the same school as Mary, Ben made good on his promise. The two look smashing in all the pictures; I’m sure they had a great time. The story, though, centers on Moser. He’s the hero. We learn nothing about Lapkowicz. Moreover, the articles use the word “friendship,” even though there’s no sense that the two have an ongoing reciprocally rewarding relationship. Has he seen her since the fourth grade? Do they hang out together? Does he pity her? Friendship is a fraught issue. Maintaining inclusive and reciprocal social contacts can be a major challenge for people with disabilities. I worry about this for my son, who has Down syndrome, and I know that I’m not alone. In my parent groups, we frequently struggle with how to build friendship networks outside of other kids who share our children’s conditions. There are lots of nice people who want to help, but do they have real friends? I’d love to read a story about Lapkowicz and her social world or perhaps something on the significant challenges faced by people with intellectual disabilities as they transition out of high school and look for work or college. Instead, all we get is the hero quarterback.

The disability community needs much more than kind restaurant employees, handsome quarterbacks and photo shoots.

The events at Qdoba raise bigger questions. David Jones noticed a woman in a wheelchair stuck outside the restaurant’s door, so he helped her inside. Then he saw her being fed by an employee, Ridge Quarles. Jones whipped out his camera, recorded it and uploaded to YouTube; the video went viral. As first reported by a local station, Quarles, when interviewed, said that he didn’t know the customer’s name but that she was a regular. “Sadly,” he added, “she has to sit outside the restaurant until someone notices her or another customer that’s coming in has to let her into the building.” When she asked for help eating, he didn’t stop to think but slapped on a pair of gloves and assisted. Like Moser, Quarles seems like a good guy. Journalists, though, can do more than declaring this story inspirational. Did Jones ask permission before objectifying this woman in his quest to praise Quarles? Do people with disabilities have the right to expect privacy? In objectifying this woman, as writer and disability activist Emily Ladau points out in a piece for the Center for Disability Rights, the stories all ignore the woman’s personal agency. “The woman is not helpless. She specifically requested assistance with eating,” Ladau writes. “She advocated for what she needed. The employee’s assistance was simply a kind acknowledgment of her request. [The comments] regarding the man are all to the effect of “bless his heart,” “what a hero,” “such a saint.” One reporter led his piece on the Qdoba story with, “Faith in humanity, restored.” Through the viral video, the woman becomes an object to be fed and a means by which to demonstrate that Quarles is a good guy.

Real support