Acouple of weeks ago I went hunting for a few stocking-stuffers for my wife and made a stop at Ann Taylor. There, I found a scarf and gloves that did the trick and was happy to see they were on sale. The clerk rang up the purchase, and as I handed over my credit card he proclaimed in a loud, clear voice: "With the markdown, you just saved $20. How much of that would you like to donate to St. Jude Children's Research Hospital?" I gave a bit.

Last week I went scrounging for some après-holiday bargains and at Brooks Brothers found a shirt and trousers suitably discounted. There, too, the register clerk informed me that I had benefited from the largess of the store and asked if I might want to reciprocate in the form of a contribution to St. Jude's. Well, all right.

If you shopped at any number of stores participating in the hospital's campaign—including Williams-Sonoma, Kmart, CVS drug stores, and others—you also were asked to contribute. Chances are, like me, you dutifully added to the kitty. But I wonder how many, like me, came away with a bad taste from the experience, an unpleasant sense of having been imposed upon.

I asked Leslie Lenkowsky, who is director of graduate programs at Indiana University's Center on Philanthropy. He acknowledges that the practice involves some arm-twisting—"You get to feel badly if you refuse to donate"—but he thinks that the register pitch is not only effective but morally superior to indirect methods (such as when a store contributes on customers' behalf a small percentage of its revenues). "From the charity's point of view, this will be viewed as more ethical," he says, "since the donor has to make an affirmative decision to give." And if you are a customer/donor, he adds, "you get the product and the warm fuzzy glow."

Well, I'm not glowing. It's more like a slow burn. If I answer yes to the pitch, I don't feel the least bit generous; I'm left with the nagging sensation of having been made to cry "uncle." I never feel as though the offhand donation amounts to much—what, only a $5 donation when spending $100 on yourself?!—which leaves me feeling rather like a skinflint. And yet, if I don't pony up at all, there's the reflexive twinge of shame. Are these the emotions businesses want to produce in their customers?