Well. Saddest drug trip episode of Mad Men ever? It sure looked like it was going to be fun at first, but when are “crashes” ever good? The episode starts with a literal car crash for Ken and the rambunctious Chevy boys, and ends with almost all of the male staff members at [What the fuck is their obnoxiously long acronym now?] making complete asses of themselves as they spend 24-72 hours hopped up on amphetamines. When this “doctor” appeared on the scene with his “vitamin supplement” shots, Anya immediately said “What, did he bring in JFK’s doctor?!” And he might as well have, given the punch these injections packed. Don’s had some pretty low moments over the course of the show, but this episode gave us uber pathetic knocking on Sylvia’s door and forcing Peggy and Ginsberg to help(?) him with his “pitch” for Sylvia to take him back. And holy hell, the turbans in this episode, thrown around like we didn’t already get that Don has serious Mommy issues.

Top Moments:

DON: The timbre of my voice is as important as the content.

We would argue that it’s more important.

Wendy not being able to find Don’s heart... Keep looking, girl.

Ken’s phenomenal tap dance that has us cringing for the pain he’ll be feeling in his foot tomorrow.

Ginsberg hitting Stan with a letter opener? Pen? during their William Tell game.

Stan and Peggy kissing! Better than Abe, but girl is holding out for Ted. Sorry, Stan!

STAN: You have a great ass.

PEGGY: Thank you.

“Because you know what he needs”

BETTY: I’ll tell you what’s going on, some elderly negro woman held your children hostage and robbed you blind.”

6. Back-to-Blonde Betty







That “elderly negro woman” sure was right about Betty being a piece of work though, huh? Betty is looking noticeably thinner and is has returned to her customary blonde locks, thanks to a great “bottle job.” Her outfit here... isn’t that great, but this episode was a bit of a downer for fashion as well. Betty can definitely do better than this red and cream combo, and we look forward to seeing some knock-outs on the campaign trail (In case you didn’t know, Henry is running for office). God, I love her, hate all you want. “I earned it!” “On what street corner?”. Great. Parenting.

5. Ken’s Gamboling Greens

We had a bit of a freak out when the episode opened on poor little Ken getting in a car accident, so we were happy to see him relatively unharmed back at the office. This is a nice shade of green on him, but we’re mostly including this look for its presence during Ken’s RIDICULOUSLY AMAZING TAP DANCE. That came outta nowhere and definitely bumped Ken up to the top of Man Men characters we would want to do drugs with. Also, Dawn’s face in this scene? Fucking priceless. What an interesting few days this must have been for all the secretaries in the office. We hope some of them used this opportunity to ask for raises.

4. Peggy’s Orange Ensemble







Peggy’s clothes just keep getting better and better. Who do you think she goes shopping with? We can’t picture Mama Olson helping her pick out any of these looks, or Abe for that matter. The patterned orange and white striped dress with cute button detailing looked pretty nice on her as she started the weekend sober. Maybe it’s just because we’re breathlessly awaiting the holiday weekend coming our way, but it put us in mind of beachy environs and maybe even a sailboat. Think Ted sails as well as he flies?

3. Sylvia’s Starfish

Alright, girlfriend! We see you went out and got your hair done, got a nice little colorful suit, and AN ADORABLE STARFISH BROOCH WITH MATCHING EARRINGS! We were pretty impressed with her holding her ground on the phone, after she discovered Don had been standing outside of their door smoking (Perfectly normal). We’re almost sad to see her go, as she seems to have grown on us a little bit. That self-respect shit is doing wonders for your complexion, lady!

2. Peggy’s Funeral Outfit

We’re just realizing that this is the second episode this season that features a funeral outfit in our top looks section. Hmmm. That’s totally fine right? We just really like black. Even as Peggy got less sober, and therefore more bedraggled as this episode progressed, we really like this black dress with graphic scarf number. The hat really made it for Anya, with the cute little tails down the back. It was a great funeral outfit, maybe for Ted’s benefit, made sadder by the fact that Peggy wore it while sharing Stan’s grief for his cousin and almost kind of sort of mentioning the loss of her baby. Luckily for her, she’s still the LEAST pathetic character of the episode by far.

1. Megan’s “Casting Couch” Outfit

Per usual, Anya was not as in love with this as Paul, but due to the mostly lackluster week for

Mad Men

apparel, Paul was able to push for this to get the top slot.

(Quite honestly, I was pulling for Sally’s great pajamas).

We wonder what play Megan was going to dressed in this groovy pink and orange swirly number. Megan has some kind of awesome hair, that we wish we could have seen that back of, and her usual assortment of excessive gold jewelry, including some kind of morningstar-esque fetish necklace.

Girl could benefit from Coco Chanel’s accessorizing philosophy, amirite?

Love the fishnets. Also, how great was Megan’s bribe to Sally of a pair of go-go boots to go with the tiny mini featured in the above Betty shot?