Micturating radio harpy Dana Loesch cancelled a book-signing for students at Texas Christian University because “idiotic” Texas gun laws won’t allow her to pack heat and stand her ground and kill someone who is shoving in line.

Well, that’s her story and she’s sticking to it, so let’s take a look at it.

In a story exclusively covered by slut-shaming stalker Betsy Rothstein at the Daily Caller — so nobody has probably read it — Loesch claims she had to cancel the book signing on Sunday — that no one was going to attend anyway since it was scheduled during the Cowboys game — because nobody including her own supposedly badass-self was allowed to bring guns to it and, therefore, it was unsafe.

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First of all, you’re probably asking yourself: “Dana Loesch wrote a book? Has she ever read one? How is this possible?” which are all fair and reasonable questions. But yes she did and it is called, ‘Hands Off My Gun,’ which is IRONY! because Loesch was told to leave her guns at home.

The second thing you are asking is “You’re more likely to get shot where there are no guns? How?” to which the answer is: “Shut up. That’s how.”

Here let Dana Danasplain’ it:

“Regrettably, today’s signing event for Hands Off My Gun at the TCU Bookstore from 2-3:30 central is canceled. I was really looking forward to this but unfortunately am uncomfortable gambling with my own, my family’s, or readers/listeners’s security. I’m just not cool with being a sitting duck somewhere or asking any of you to be also.”

Apparently bookstore gun-battles are a “thing” and Dana was not about to bring a Sharpie™ to a gun fight, like that time a guy showed up and got all shouty and shit and “punched the promotional materials.”

That was just like Sandy Hook — without the guns and dead kids — but almost exactly the same.

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Of course, this latest could also be a publicity stunt that Dana came up with after reading about Anita Sarkeesian canceling her talk in Utah because people could have concealed weapons, in which case we need to have a discussion with Rothstein about journalistic ethics.

Then again it wouldn’t be a vintage Dana Loesch whine if it didn’t contain at least one gross lie steaming pile of bullshit inaccuracy.

Dana told a credulous Rothstein:

”TCU is a great school and it’s unfortunate that they’re bound by Texas’s idiotic gun laws.”

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As one blog likes to say: Sadly, no.

In response to President Barack Obama’s proposed gun control policies, Texas lawmakers filed legislature to allow students to carry concealed weapons at public universities. However, some college presidents have opposing views on the dangers that come with carrying weapons. TCU is a private university and is therefore exempt from the bill, so the decision is up to the discretion of the university. […] TCU Police Chief Steven McGee said that he believes allowing concealed weapons on campus would be more dangerous. TCU currently has a vault at the university police station where students who are licensed gun owners can store their guns. McGee said this allows officers to get a chance to talk to the students and assess what they’re doing. Pam Christian, a crime prevention specialist with the university police, also said she believes allowing students to carry a concealed weapon would make the campus more dangerous. “All of our students are very young and they’re experiencing some of their first things in life, one being alcohol, and alcohol has a tendency to change the judgment of someone when they have a bit too much and I would hate for them to ever make a mistake” said Christian.

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Dana shoots — pyew! pyew! pyew! — and misses.

Which is perhaps why campus administratrors don’t want her on campus, locked and loaded.