Amusement park owners weren't always so cautious, though, and even these days, there are still some reminders of why all that crap is necessary. Like ...

One of the most annoying things about going to an amusement park (and there's plenty to choose from) is all the stupid precautions, from those bars that pin you to the seat even if you're just going to the bathroom to the part where they force you to listen as a suicidal ride attendant recites the same warnings for the 500th time in the day.

6 The Original Russian Mountains

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Russia has a long, proud, terrifying history with roller coasters dating back to the 17th century, when something (most likely copious amounts of vodka consumption) convinced the Russians that constructing massive wooden scaffolds, coating them in ice and pushing their children down them would be a great idea.

Russian Art

"Thank goodness child abuse hasn't been invented yet!"

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Russian Mountains are basically giant, nearly five-stories-tall slides built from the most rudimentary materials possible -- even the "sleighs" were made entirely out of ice. This is the sort of ingenious yet utterly unlikely contraption you'd expect to find in an episode of The Flintstones. Riders would climb up the long, rickety staircase and fling themselves down on frozen toboggans, which often came complete with a purposefully placed bump at the end just to jar your groin a bit more.

Ultimate Roller Coaster

That is, assuming your groin wasn't still attached to the ice at the top of the slide.

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As for safety measures, they consisted of a rope fastened to the sleigh for you to hold on to as you careened down the track at what was typically a 50-degree angle and the period's most technologically advanced stopping mechanism: