1.

Dr. Abigail Cockbane

You are Dr. Abigail Cockbane, author of many, many books, and recently elevated to the highest of heights by becoming an associate professor of Women's Studies. With a bigoted troll in the Oval Office, you have directed all of your power and intellect at combating the greatest threat that all cis women face: being uncomfortable sharing a bathroom or locker room with trans women. You ignore the fact that most trans women want to work with cis women to prevent rape, keep abortion rights, end workplace discrimination, and persue many other feminist goals. You don't care that all but the most self-deluded trans women understand how many advantages men have in our society. None of this matters because feminism needs a universal definition of womanhood to make any progress, and a century of cisgender feminists arguing about this definition while still making progress is completely irrelevant. You may not have great priorities, but you do have pretty great hair. See you at the next ritual of blood!