“We’re bad at this.”

When I was introducing my old roommates to Steven Universe, and we took a moment to breathe after Alone Together, I assured them that the next episode was nice and light. After finishing The Test, one of them turned to me with wide eyes: “You call that light?”

Compared to Alone Together, pretty much any episode is going to be less intense. But no, it turns out I don’t actually think The Test is light at all. There are more obvious examples like Mirror Gem, Bismuth, and Bubbled, but I’d say The Test portrays loss of innocence better than any other episode: it cuts through the fantasy metaphor that so much of the show relies on to present the real, harrowing moment of a child realizing their all-knowing parents are just winging it.

This is our first rainy opening since Steven the Sword Fighter, and we once again see the Gems spend such a day indoors, partaking in human recreation with Steven (but not quite getting how it works). Steven may be more childish than the Gems, but Citchen Calamity’s strange rules prime us to see him as a teacher for a moment. The Gems are out of their depth, but Steven knows just what to do.

Still, it’s not long before he’s thrust back into the role of student. I love the decision to tie Steven’s motivation to a concrete failure, and not just because The Test retroactively improves Cheeseburger Backpack. His development over the past thirty-eight episodes is clear, but so gradual that it’s still a little nuts to compare him (and the show’s art design) between now and then.

We also haven’t had a straight-up Dungeon Episode since Serious Steven, and even though I’m not the greatest fan of it or Cheeseburger Backpack, the structure itself was never the problem. It’s awesome to see Steven on his own, solving puzzles straight out of Indiana Jones (the boulder is an obvious nod, but Pearl’s panel floor and even the invisible ground over Amethyst’s pit evoke the Holy Grail’s trials). He’s still a huge goof, cracking jokes to himself and cheering with delight upon solving puzzles, but now he’s that competent goof promised all the way back in Gem Glow. And he has been for a while now!

Which is why the revelation that it’s all rigged is so upsetting. There would be no issue with this scenario thirty episodes ago, where Steven would be just as eager for a test but too busy tuning his ukulele to avoid dismemberment. After Alone Together’s break, we’re back to Warp Tour’s core conflict of the Gems not seeing or trusting Steven’s growth, but instead of getting frustrated by it, now we see how much it embarrasses him. His lack of respect has shifted from a motivator to a source of shame, because now he’s mature enough to notice how belittled he is.

I mentioned in Warp Tour that I love examining the mechanics behind a magical function, and The Test provides another awesome example. Steven testing the Test’s limits is a marvel to behold, deconstructing every element with Zach Callison’s incredulous irritation. The Indiana Jones feel helps immensely, lending the traps an iconic nature that we accept without questioning. But how would a pressure-based fire trap actually work? How did they get the boulder up there, and how was the room structured to ensure maximum crushing speed? Here the answer may be simple as magic, but like Steven, we’re learning to look beyond the surface for understanding.

After yelling the boulder back into Amethyst’s massive marble maw, we’re treated to one of my favorite one-off settings of the series. Like Rose’s Room, the limits of a light construct are reached, and there’s a breathtaking loneliness to the roof of the trials.

Steven’s walk atop the level echoes Mario’s brick path to the Warp Zone, a forbidden secret that bypasses the game he’s supposed to be playing. The rules, which were so important to Citchen Calamity and the Test, are out the window, and the structure of the episode itself, which looked to be a breezy dungeon mission just like old times, has met a similar fate.

The climactic conversation between the Gems is just heartbreaking. We and Steven have seen how they can be imperfect role models throughout the series, but there’s incredible power in a flawed role model acknowledging their flaws. The curtain covering the secret world of parents has been pulled, in the way it does for every child at some point, and he’s suddenly seeing the Gems as real people under the immense pressure of raising a kid.

Pearl, ever the mother, lays out distinct concerns about Steven, showing that they have noticed his growth, even if they remain uncertain. Amethyst’s lack of confidence is a known quantity, but that doesn’t take away the sting of our header quote. She then invokes Rose, which not only reminds us that they aren’t actually Steven’s parents, but that they’re still reeling from losing somebody “to tell [them] what to do.”

But it’s Garnet, the powerful and distant leader, who really twists the knife, backing up Amethyst cynicism over Pearl’s hope. She holds her shades, ostensibly glimpsing into the future, and is coming up empty.

(Ugh, and the balloons behind them. They’re trying so hard.)

It’s barely a twist that Steven’s determined scowl isn’t going to lead to an outburst, because we know the kind of kid he is and the kind of show this is. Still, the music sets the scene perfectly (the incorporation of Pearl’s puzzle is wonderful) and Steven’s staredown of the boulder and march through the fire is uncharacteristically badass.

The Gems cheering for him here is indistinguishable from their laudatory behavior elsewhere (Garnet is taciturn, Pearl quavers, Amethyst whoops), removing any doubt that hiding their insecurities is at all unusual for them. Steven doesn’t need to confront them about this, he needs to comfort them, so he does.

Steven may worry that he can’t live up to Rose, but The Test shows that he’s his mother’s son. He wants to take care of people, even the people taking care of him. And he’s willing to bend the truth and keep a secret to do so. For now, giving the Gems what they need is exactly what he needs. But this turning point in their relationship isn’t necessarily a good thing: it shows a new level of maturity, sure, but we’ll see how the weight of being a child who must take care of his caretakers will weigh on him in the Future.



Future Vision!

…is the name of our next episode! Finally!

If every pork chop were perfect, we wouldn’t have inconsistencies…

Such a nitpick, but Pearl’s “there are more?” in regards to Steven’s board game closet implies that a kid with a board game closet hasn’t played multiple board games with her. (Also we’ve seen her playing checkers with Amethyst.)

I’ve never been to this…how do you say…school?

Steven Universe’s storyboarders provide brilliant promo art for the episodes they create, but starting with The Test, Hilary Florido goes above and beyond the call of duty to craft ongoing High School AU variants. This art is too beautiful not to share at every opportunity, so Florido gets her own section!

We’re the one, we’re the ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR!

I harped on the emotions, because The Test really packs a punch, but it’s also just fun to watch, from Steven listing board game parodies to the action-packed (if toothless) traps. This is wonderful well-rounded stuff, and its “low” placement on my list proves that high quality episodes are piling up.

Top Ten

Love ‘em



Like ‘em

Enh

No Thanks!

3. Fusion Cuisine

2. House Guest

1. Island Adventure