There are some lawyers out there with a real snooty attitude when it comes to federal bankruptcy judges. It’s like they don’t consider bankruptcy judges as “real” judges because they aren’t blessed under the auspices of Article III. As though lifetime tenure magically makes one a more acute legal mind or physically hotter (no matter what a certain Article III Groupie might think).

These lawyers made the fatal mistake of disrespecting the wrong bankruptcy judge and that’s why they’re going to be spending some quality time in the jailhouse.

On June 10, 2014, the Court entered a Judgment that, among other things, imposed $49,720.00 in sanctions upon James Robinson, his “firm” Critique Services L.L.C., and their then-counsel, Elbert Walton Jr. (collectively, the “Respondents”) for contempt, abuse, false statements, and other violations…

You know you’re in a bad place when the judge opens up his comments by using quotation marks to describe your business. Judge Rendlen isn’t getting past sentence number two before throwing shade.

Bankruptcy Judge Charles E. Rendlen III may be a badass, but you can’t accuse him of being impatient. As the bench warrant, issued yesterday, notes, Judge Rendlen imposed sanctions last June, prompting the parties to appeal to the district court to get the “real” judge they wanted. And yet they never paid the sanctions, got a bond for the sanctions, or secured a stay of the order while they pursued their appeal. Judge Rendlen pointed out this oversight, but otherwise waited patiently as the district court affirmed his order last month. Then, unbelievably, the parties filed an appeal to the Eighth Circuit — still ignoring the original order.

At this point, Judge Rendlen took action, putting out a Show Cause Order that finally netted some vague representations from the “firm” (let’s just use his parlance) that it would pay its obligations. But Robinson and Walton, the actual lawyers in this case, completely ignored Judge Rendlen’s Show Cause Order.

Judge Rendlen isn’t even mad, just disappointed.

Demonstrating their usual unmitigated arrogance and complete lack of respect for the Court or themselves as attorneys, Robinson and Walton did not respond to the Pay, Post or Show Cause Order.

They don’t respect themselves! Withering. As Judge Rendlen progresses, his frustration continues to compound:

As noted above, neither Robinson nor Walton has filed a response to the Pay, Post or Show Cause Order. Neither has paid the sanctions or posted the bond. Neither has argued that he is not required to pay the sanctions or post the bond. Neither has suggested that there is any cause for not further sanctioning him. Neither made a representation that he is attempting to procure a bond. Neither alleged financial incapability.

OK forget “isn’t even mad, just disappointed” — he’s actually mad.

The imposition of additional monetary sanctions would be fruitless. The record in this Case clearly establishes that monetary sanctions do not garner the Respondents’ compliance with court orders. Similarly, the record in this Case establishes that the imposition of light-weight non-monetary sanctions would be useless. Over the course of this Case, the Court has: revoked Robinson’s CMEFC privileges; revoked Robinson’s privilege of using the exteriorly located drop box for filing; suspended Robinson and Walton from the privilege of practicing before the Court; referred the Judgment to the U.S. District Court for disciplinary investigation; referred the Judgment to the U.S. Trustee for suspected bankruptcy fraud; held the Respondents in contempt; and imposed sanctions against Robinson for discovery violations, including striking the answer and directing that the well-pleaded allegations by the Debtor be determined to be fact. None of these non-monetary sanctions garnered the Respondents’ compliance with their discovery obligations. The Court will not further indulge Robinson and Walton by imposing additional monetary sanctions or softball non-monetary sanctions that will just be ignored and do nothing to garner their compliance.

Now, on my word, unleash hell.

Because monetary sanctions and lesser non-monetary sanctions would not garner compliance, and because the Respondents have failed to comply with the Pay, Post or Show Cause Order, the Court ORDERS that the attachment of the bodies of and the arrest of JAMES C. ROBINSON and ELBERT WALTON, JR. Each is to be held in custody for the lesser of (i) thirty (30) days, or (ii) until (a) the $52,206.00 bond is posted, or (b) other cause is shown making his release from incarceration proper.

Enjoy your time in the pokey.

(The full bench warrant is available on the next page.)

UPDATE (12/11/2105): Another lawyer in this mess got suspended for being “dishonest and dangerously incompetent.” Check out that order on page 3.