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A call came in to the Bala detachment of the Ontario Provincial Police this week about an overturned boat spotted from shore.

In a normal summer, this would be a routine emergency for officers in the heart of Muskoka cottage country. In the middle of a spring pandemic, however, with the police boats still on dry land, it was a nuisance that put emergency responders in unnecessary contact with each other, and in the end for nothing.

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It also illustrated a social dynamic playing out across Canada, from the Kootenays to the Outaouais, as the affluent take advantage of their private rural isolation opportunities, local snitches call in reports of city folk, mayors try to keep a lid on it all with earnest appeals to social conscience, and provincial governments impose travel bans that fall short of enforceable legal orders.

There is no question that people are hiding now in Muskoka

The “vessel” in Muskoka turned out to be a paddleboat that was floating empty after blowing off a dock in a windstorm. To be fair, wind does not discriminate. It might have belonged to a year-long local resident who has been obeying quarantine advice and got out their paddleboat the same week the ice went out. Local officials have other suspicions, though. Losing a paddleboat after a long weekend is a pretty classic “weekend warrior” move.