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People say feminism is a religion—what they mean by that is the blind faith by which feminists cling to feminist dogma. I agree, but feminism is more religion-like than even that. Here’s Wikipedia’s definition of religion, which is pretty much what you’d learn in a philosophy of religion course:

A religion is an organized collection of beliefs, cultural systems, and world views that relate humanity to an order of existence. Many religions have narratives, symbols, and sacred histories that are intended to explain the meaning of life and/or to explain the origin of life or the Universe. From their beliefs about the cosmos and human nature, people derive morality, ethics, religious laws or a preferred lifestyle. Many religions may have organized behaviors, clergy, a definition of what constitutes adherence or membership, holy places, and scriptures. The practice of a religion may also include rituals, sermons, commemoration or veneration of a deity, gods or goddesses, sacrifices, festivals, feasts, trance, initiations, funerary services, matrimonial services,meditation, prayer, music, art, dance, public service or other aspects of human culture. Religions may also contain mythology.

Feminism is about the belief in a nebulous, all-powerful entity known as the patriarchy. Since the dawn of time, the patriarchy has oppressed women by keeping them in bondage and servitude to men. Then, about 50 years ago, feminism came along and fought the patriarchy, freeing women from the chains in which the patriarchy had shackled them. But the fight is not over because no matter how much power women actually have in the political, social, and economic spheres, the patriarchy still exists, despite having no formal organization of any kind.

Many feminists attribute the patriarchy to being comprised of rich and powerful men—except it is rich and powerful men who give feminism what it wants, so it cannot be them. Other feminists attribute the patriarchy to being every male acting in concert. However, women can oppress women as well, and in those instances it is said that they have the patriarchy ingrained within them. Therefore, the patriarchy takes on a mythological quality—one that takes faith to believe in. And faith is required because without the patriarchy, feminism collapses into nonsense. This is why feminism defies logic, just as most other religions do on a fundamental level. The patriarchy cannot be seen, heard, or even touched, but it is there, always oppressing, even if it is abundantly clear that women are not oppressed.

So, if Christianity is a religion defined by the belief in Jesus Christ and the veneration and worship of him, then feminism is a religion defined by the constant battle against the evil, all-powerful deity known as the patriarchy. Many of you may be thinking that feminism is not trying to explain the cosmos, just a very narrow part of it. You’d be wrong—because if it exists, patriarchy is there, and so is feminism to fight it. There is feminist biology, psychology, physics, metaphysics, and chemistry. Feminism has even seeped into other formal organized religions, completely changing their world views to fit feminists, as evidenced by the Silent Voices Bible, in which all the characters are gender-swapped.

Once the basis of the feminist religion is established, most of the other trappings of religion fall into place. Here are some examples:

Feminism’s holy scripture is The Feminine Mystique by feminist prophet Betty Friedan, which is the book that created feminism by alerting the world to the existence of the patriarchy. Other major prophets of feminism are Simone de Beauvoir, Gloria Steinem, and Andrea Dworkin.

Feminist ethics is moral relativism masquerading as something known as the Ethics of Care as postulated by Carol Gilligan. It posits that women make ethical decisions based on how it makes others feel, as opposed to strict right and wrong, as the patriarchy instructs men to do.

Feminist temples are women’s studies departments. Its clergy are women’s studies professors. In these temples, the priests of feminism attempt to detect patriarchy’s nasty influence and then develop weapons (ideology) to fight against it.

Feminist missionaries are feminist writers and media personalities such as columnist Jessica Valenti and the entire cast of The View, who attempt to coerce everyone into engaging in feminist religious worship.

Feminist religious worship is celebrating the vagina, often quite literally, and bashing men.

There is plenty of feminist art, music, and dance to go around.

In conclusion, feminism is not just a religion because of the blind faith that an evil deity called the patriarchy exists and must be stomped out but because it literally is a religion in every sense of the word. This is why feminism is so entrenched in our culture: the prophets came and converted millions, and because society is religious, many believed. Our work is cut out for us—even though the patriarchy is just a myth, countless still believe anyway.