By @specficluchador

Progress returned to the north for their second show of the year, Unknown Pleasures on the day of St Valentine. Once again, Progress continued to prove why they are the hottest ticket in Europe with yet another show packed with gimps, dildos and whipped cream-and that was only Jack Sexsmith. Elsewhere, great matches between Timothy Thatcher/Jack Gallagher, Tommy End/James Davis, Mikey Whiplash/Rampage Brown and Marty Scurll/Mark Haskins ensured the Manchester shows continue the trend of being as important as the London shows.

The Dazzler Team (Earl Black Jr & Darrell Allen) vs The Origin (Dave Mastiff & Zack Gibson) vs Sweet Jesus (Chuck Mambo & Pastor William Eaver) vs Joe Coffey & Damo

Joe Coffey is a man who I have been desperate to see in Progress for over a year now. At Unknown Pleasures, The Iron Man made his Progress debut and received a raucous ovation from the Manchester faithful. Underscored by the sound of fans chanting the chords of Black Sabbath’s Ironman, Coffey’s first action in the Progress ring witnessed him leave a path of destruction, running through both members of The Dazzler Team. The Origin would gain the advantage through illicit means, with Coffey receiving the brunt of the punishment following frequent tags. Damo, making his Progress return, came to his partner’s aid, sending Gibson to the outside before squaring off with Mastiff. Following a Goliath vs Goliath trading of offence and an attempt from Allen & Gibson and Earl Black Jr & Coffey to unsuccessfully suplex Damo and Mastiff respectively, the match broke down as everyone landed their signature offence. Gibson, ever wily, secured the victory, grabbing a handful of tights after rolling up Chuck Mambo. Post-match, frustrated, Damo and Coffey laid waste to Sweet Jesus and Earl Black Jr.

For the most part, this match was excellent; interactions between Mastiff/Damo are always fun, Coffey was great as always and The Dazzler Team continued to improve. However, the finishing sequence appeared overly contrived, with a lot of guys waiting around for someone to do something. Despite this, everyone got over pretty big with the crowd. Considering the post-match angle, it appears Coffey and Damo may be set for further appearances in Progress. As a tag team or singles competitors, both would bring a different dynamic to the Progress roster. On another note, Zack Gibson, a Liverpool native, in Manchester is something to behold. In London, he gets more than his fair share of inflammatory chants from the crowd but in Manchester it is nuclear.

Jack Sexsmith vs Bubblegum

14th February. Valentine’s Day. And what better way to spend Valentine’s Day than with your gimp and whipped cream. Sexsmith shared his whipped cream rather suggestively with members of the audience before the match began. Sexsmith will, undoubtedly, divide fans: I, firmly, believe that he is tremendous fun, sporting the incredibly outlandish gimmick of being both sexually frivolous and morally ambiguous. It takes a hell of a lot of balls and charisma to pull it off and there is no doubt that he does. Lots of antics in this match, as expected. Bubblegum, too, was more than fair game. Both Bubblegum and Sexsmith soon had their arses exposed before Bubblegum received a fierce spank to his bottom. The gimp, presumably feeling left out, made his/her/its way to the ring for a spanking, too. Bubblegum applied a Boston Crab after Sexsmith sucked on Bubblegum’s ball sweat dipped fingers. Sexsmith appeared to have tapped but referee Joel Alan claimed that he didn’t tap the mat but tapped his hand. The finish came soon after a failed Mr Cocko attempt as Bubblegum landed a facebuster to secure the victory. As I previously mentioned, you’re either going to love this match or find it physically repulsing. For me, this was real good fun and testament to the wide spectrum of talent Progress posses.

South Pacific Power Couple (TK Cooper & Daliah Black) vs Flash Morgan Webster & Pollyanna

The South Pacific Power Couple (SPPC) have been a perennial thorn in Pollyanna’s side across ENDVR and Chapter shows. At the last show, Pollyanna was robbed of certain victory following TK Cooper’s interference that led to Pollyanna seeking the help of Flash Morgan Webster.

SPPC worked over Pollyanna in the early stages with frequent tags. Pollyanna made the tag as Morgan delivered a series of aerial offence that culminated in a standing shooting star press. Pollyanna, upon being tagged back in, proceeded to kick out a frankly ridiculous double team moves by SPPC. TK Cooper, who had been on the receiving end of some derogatory chants, missed Pollyanna with a handful of chain. Daliah Black and Pollyanna brawled around the ring as Flash Morgan landed the 630 to secure the victory.

There were good things about this match: SSPC’s inability to keep their hands off one another is incredibly effective at drawing heat not to mention their entrance theme is so filthy it requires one to take a shower after it, Pollyanna’s stock continued to rise with another impressive performance and Flash Morgan Webster landed a 630 for the first time. This match received a standing ovation. I, however, thought this was a mess in parts; Flash Morgan spent the majority of the time on the outside looking in whilst waiting for his cue, there was no real logic or psychology to this and it was carried by a series of big move kick outs. ANDDD, the guy who wasn’t in the rivalry to begin with scored the pinfall, albeit in impressive fashion.

Timothy Thatcher vs Jack Gallagher

For the most part of this match, the crowd watched on in a combination of awe and astonishment at Timothy Thatcher and Jack Gallagher’s world class exhibition of grappling. Excuse me a moment whilst I gush about Thatcher: there is no one in the world that can touch his grappling game. Combine that with his single facial expression, limb work, understanding of psychology and selling, there are few more compelling performers in the world. Jack Gallagher was equal to the task, keeping up with Thatcher every step of the way. Gallagher worked the legs and lower back whilst Thatcher worked the arm throughout the match. A theme of this match was the incredible transitions from hold to hold, with both men transitioning seamlessly from one hold to the next. The finish came when Thatcher transitioned from a double underhook suplex into the Fujiwara arm bar before Gallagher rolled through, applying a Boston Crab to secure the victory. This was an outstanding match between two of the best grapplers in the world. Thatcher is like a drug: he may not be for everyone, but once you have experienced the unadulterated pleasure of seeing him live you will be hooked. I will have seen him four times in three weeks before his tour of the UK is over, such is the life of an addict.

Mikey Whiplash vs Rampage Brown

Heading into this match, there was no back story to be used as a crutch. However, that did not stop Mikey Whiplash and Rampage Brown attempting to murder each other. If the previous match was a nuanced exhibition of wrestling, this was a war. As soon as the bell rang, Whiplash and Rampage appeared set on destroying The Ritz. The brawl soon spilled to the outside, with both men being sent crashing into crowd at various stages. Back in the ring following a figure four around the ringpost, Whiplash and Rampage traded thunderous forearms before Rampage, through his bigger size, emerged victorious from the striking battle. Rampage Brown landed several power moves punctuated with a scary belly to back suplex from the top rope that dropped Whiplash on his neck. Moments later, Rampage secured the victory following a piledriver. Both Whiplash and Rampage, veterans of the UK independent scene, are often overlooked in discussions of British talent but matches like this are proof to their abundant ability. Whiplash is one of the most diversely talented workers in the UK, equally adept at hardcore or mat wrestling. Although this was closer to the former, this was great.

Tommy End vs James Davis

Winner chooses a stipulation for Chapter 27

For the past three months, tensions between Sumerian Death Squad and London Riots have grown exponentially. Sumerian Death Squad blamed London Riots for them losing the Progress Tag Team Titles back at Chapter 23. A match between the two teams was not enough to settle their differences at Chapter 24 as the fourth anniversary show was set as the final encounter between two teams that have defined tag team wrestling Europe over the past few years. Two singles matches between the components of each team were made to determine the stipulations for their match at Chapter 27: Rob Lynch defeated Michael Dante at Chapter 25, adding the TLC stipulation. The winner of End/Davis would receive the privilege of choosing the second stipulation.

The match began at a ferocious pace, with both men trading kicks and forearm strikes before Davis landed a trifecta of topes. Back in the ring, End drew blood following a brutal roundhouse kick/jumping knee combo. Davis spat a mixture of saliva and blood at End, unperturbed by the sight of his own blood, Davis fought back, landing a piledriver followed by a powerbomb for a near fall. End blocked a second powerbomb attempt, landing a double foot stomp before submitting Davis with a Black Widow. Following the match, End announced that the losing team at Chapter 27 must disband.

This was a great match that far surpassed the Dante/Lynch match a few weeks back. Tommy End brings a veneer of legitimacy to proceedings through wince inducing strikes, kicks and knees. Considering the loser must disband stipulation, it appears that SDS may be not long for Progress.

Marty Scurll (C) vs Mark Haskins

Progress Championship Match

A sombre cloud was cast over Progress following Chapter 25 as The Villain Marty Scurll dethroned Will Ospreay as Progress Champion in a phenomenal No DQ match. Marty Scurll, new Progress Champion, stoically made his way to the ring, showing nothing but a look of sheer intensity and a desire to cling to what he has worked so hard to gain. The challenger, Mark Haskins, has remained at the top of the Progress card for a long time, consistently falling short when it comes to title matches: at Chapter 26, following victory over Zack Gibson, received his second title opportunity in five shows.

Haskins and Scurll both began looking to apply their signature submissions to no avail in a lighting fast opening exchange. Nefarious as ever, Scrull gained the advantage with a thumb to the eye before proceeding to work Haskins’ taped arm. Scurll tossed Haskins from pillar to post, ensuring that his arm collided with anything in its path. Haskins, however, soon forgot that the match was constructed primarily around Scurll’s work on the arm. Haskins instead chose to mount his comeback as though no one had been bouncing his arm around, rapidly transitioning from move to move. I don’t want to get too hung up on Haskins’ selling as this was a great match that a minor quibble shouldn’t obscure. Anyway, Haskins ran through his extensive submission arsenal, transitioning from a head and arm choke to the arm bar before Scurll reversed into the cattle mutilation. Haskins escaped momentarily only for Scurll to apply the chicken wing before Haskins rolled through into the arm bar in a great exchange.

Following a striking battle, Haskins emerged on top, delivering a michinoku driver before the Made in Japan-but the newly crowned championed refused to be beaten. Haskins reached for Scurll’s umbrella as Scurll encouraged Haskins, a man who had given his all but still come up short, to strike him with it. The ref took the umbrella, turning his back to allow Scurll to land a low blow- but Haskins kicked out. In an homage to Bryan Danielson (I have never seen Scurll do this before), Scurll stomped on Haskins’ chest before applying the chicken wing to submit Haskins and retain the Progress Championship. Scurll, not content to leave Haskins with the memory of another shortcoming, took a chair to Haskins’ arm to inflict further punishment.

As Scurll left, Haskins violently refused assistance, pushing the ring crew and medical personnel away until he was acquiesced by his wife. I’m not a fan of having familial involvement, although it did not detract from what was an incredible match. Additionally, I can understand why certain selling enthusiasts wouldn’t enjoy this match but again don’t let that detract from an incredible match. Scurll’s transition from happy go lucky party boy to the most complete worker in Europe has been one of the highlights of the British wrestling renaissance: he has always been a gifted worker but the addition of several character and technical nuances has elevated Scurll to one of the best in the world. With Ospreay out of the main event scene, at least for now, Scrull is more than able to deliver fantastic main events. However, currently there appears to be a lack of contenders for Scurll’s title. At Chapter 27, perhaps we will see the return of one Jimmy Havoc.

Final Word: Sure, this show featured a couple of messy matches but the final four matches made this another fantastic Chapter show. Each one of the last four matches brought something unique that added to the whole and the Bubblegum match was the cherry on top of Sexsmith’s whipped cream. Heading into the fourth anniversary show, Progress is stronger than ever and continues to go from strength to strength.