Fresh off the Battle of Montreal, which the almost universally despised pickup artist and rape legalization proponent Roosh Valizadeh insists on considering a grand victory, Roosh and his minions are preparing for what he is imaginatively calling The Battle of Toronto.

He’s starting at a bit of a disadvantage here, given that the mayor of the city has already made it clear Roosh isn’t welcome, and has been urging all possible venues for Roosh’s event to refuse him their services.

Naturally, as was the case in Montreal, Roosh insists on planning his super seekrit “operations” in full view of the public.

First up is what Roosh calls “Operation Fornication,” a three prong plan, announced yesterday, to “Identify” and “Infiltrate” his opponents, who at this point comprise virtually everyone who has ever heard of him, and then to, er, “Inseminate” them.

Roosh, trying his hand at humor, explains that:

The best way to gain the trust of a woman is to fuck her. Therefore I ask you take one for the team and seduce these feminists in order to gain access to their plans. It should be easy since they are constantly surrounded by limp-wristed manginas who provide them with no sexual attraction. I understand that these women are universally repulsive, overweight, and often in late stages of the devastating Lindy West disease, but no one said spycraft would be easy. A commendation medal is in store for you if you gain intelligence through the fornication that saves the event. Just be sure to record the sex act because these girls are the most likely to falsely accuse you of rape.

Yeah, we saw what happened the last time Roosh tried the whole fornication thing, didn’t we?

Last night, Roosh announced an even sillier new plan that he is calling “Operation Caliphate.” In this plan he will pretend that his noxious ideas and behaviors stem from his Islamic beliefs.

Even though he doesn’t actually have any Islamic beliefs.

Even though he recently ran a post on his Return of Kings blog titled “Islamophobia Is Perfectly Natural” and another on dating Muslims in which the author declared that

Islam presents a direct threat to a free, open, prosperous, and advancing human civilization with justice and equal rights for all.

Roosh’s new plan is so half-assed that he didn’t even bother to proofread his announcement:

The attacks against me is [sic] obviously Islamophobia. My traditional beliefs on women and family come from my father, who is Muslim (Shia branch). White Canadian feminists forget to check their privilege before attacking our masculine views which stem for [sic] the mighty Koran. As you know I am a practicing Muslim man. The mosque is my sanctuary in which I strengthen my views on masculinity and patriarchy. The Prophet Muhammad and I stand together against SlutWalks, false rape accusations, obesity, and cat tattoos.

Oh, and that crappy photoshop of Roosh as a Muslim at the top of this post? I didn’t make it. Roosh did, declaring it to be “a recreation of how I look in traditional Muslim garb.”

He’s about as convincing as a Muslim as Vincent Adultman from the Netflix show Bojack Horsemen is at pretending to be, well, an adult man.

I have no idea what Roosh is even trying to do here. Either Roosh thinks feminists are even more gullible than the idiots who’ve paid $50 to see his little talks, or he’s drunk. I can’t tell.

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