After the devastating loss of Euro Cup underdogs Iceland, rates of atheism skyrocketed throughout Europe as people slowly realised that there is no God, there is only the French national football team. Iceland had climbed their way to the quarter-finals of the 2016 tournament after an unprecedented string of victories, leading many to believe that there was, in fact, a higher power who gives fair shots to people that deserve it.

“Well it was fun while it lasted but I guess God is just a human creation used to cope with the unknown for thousands of years,” said UEFA chairman Michel Platini, adding “It’s just a shame we had to find out in such a harsh fashion.”

The Iceland team took to the internet after the 5-2 loss to console fans about there being no reality to God or the concept of afterlife.

“We played our best and gave it our all but ultimately we couldn’t stop the world from realising that life is meaningless and humanity is simply a cosmic coincidence with no effect on the universe at large.” said Iceland midfielder Gylfi Sigurðsson.

Meanwhile, French captain Hugo Lloris rebuked the statements that their win had caused a continent wide existential crisis, saying “If you think this is bad, wait until Germany bloody win.”