Making the decision to respond to a sudden, violent attack is normally an easy process. The threat presents with such force you know, without any doubt, you must respond with more force. "Almost invariably a man" - Bill Jordan states in "No Second Place Winner" – "provided he does not have too much time to think, will automatically do what he has been trained to do." It's those situations where things are not so cut and dried that present us with a problem. You notice a stranger look at you from several rows over in the parking lot. He glances around and moves in a direction to intercept your line of travel. You slow down. He changes direction slightly to adjust and speeds up. "Hey," he says moving closer. "My truck broke down, and I'm trying to get to Tennessee for a job," he says. As soon as you notice a stranger look and start moving in your direction you begin your response. You hold one hand out and tell him to "Stop!" Issuing verbal commands to strangers isn't the way we're raised. We don't want to come off as being rude. But, there is no way to tell whether they may have ill intent or not, and you can't afford to be concerned with hurting someone's feelings. While issuing verbal commands you should be trying to position objects between you and the possible problem plus scanning to see if he is acting as a distraction while his partner is approaching from another direction. You notice he's gesturing with one hand and arm and the other is in his coat pocket. "A guy like you," he says, "probably wouldn't understand, but I could really use your help if you have any money to spare?" As you're thinking about how to respond he moves another step forward, in an almost timid like fashion as if he's not sure it's ok. The phrase "A guy like you probably wouldn't understand," or anything similar, is a technique Gavin De Becker calls "Typecasting" in his book "The Gift of Fear." This threat is trying to create an image that you'll feel compelled to prove is inaccurate. They are trying to open a door to further engage you. Moving in a timid fashion is an attempt to feel you out, to see if they can get closer without you becoming concerned. Again, verbal commands and creating distance is a good idea. "I promise you," he adds while moving closer, "I just need your help getting my truck fixed. The radiator is leaking but I've got to get a ride to the shop to pick some up because you know they close at nine and I don't have a lot of time to waste if I'm going to get there on time in the morning. My cousin set up this interview for me and I just got to be there." The threat is using the "Too Many Details" technique. When someone is attempting to deceive another person they'll often provide more information than should be necessary to explain the situation. This is another attempt to deceive. By continuing to talk, overwhelming you with details, they are trying to keep you from focusing on what is really occurring. "No! Do not come any closer." You're forcefully telling them to keep their distance. No matter what they are asking you tell them "No." Don't become involved in a verbal exchange. Communication is a good distraction device. It's difficult to think, assess, make decisions and talk at the same time. When the words like "no" or "stop" are ignored you have to start considering there is a real problem; they are trying to take control of you. These terms De Becker tells us "must never be negotiated," and the person ignoring them is definitely up to no good. At this point it's probably time to get your weapon in hand and prepare to defend. The signs are all there. You've done everything possible – issuing commands, creating distance, and obtaining cover – and the threat is continuing to press. There's going to be conflict. There is a lot of gray area on when you draw your weapon; each situation is different. You can start issuing verbal commands at any time, and usually the sooner the better. When someone ignores your commands and the weapon in your hand get ready. The question now is are you going to win? Learn to read the signs, identify common techniques bad guys use, train and practice your skills so when the time comes you're fully prepared.http://shootrite.org/dvd/dvd.html Website: www.shootrite.org http://www.facebook.com/pages/Shootrite-Firearms-Academy/156608611038230?ref=ts