meliorating:

I’m constantly struggling with what I want to say and what would be most acceptable to say, how I would make people listen to me most. But perhaps equating speaking my mind through ways that are “acceptable,” or rather, conventional, with change is wherein the problem lies. How are you ever supposed to break cycles that have produced the same unwanted results if you just try to subtly hint at what you want and try to completely avoid provoking the person at all?

No, you need to evoke some sort of strong emotion–some sort of anger or strong sense of guilt. It’s never enough to just pass it off as no big deal. You need to let them know, no, the word “retarded” is not synonymous with “dumb” and it’s not okay to use it in that context, or that the “Make Me Asian” app is not something that people should “lighten up” about, that it is not a joke and is, in fact, incredibly offensive. And provoking others is exactly what you should do to make them remember. Fight against what is the norm; say what is “unacceptable,” and hence, unexpected, and rub them the wrong way. Tell others that they’re wrong and perhaps they’ll fight against you because of their deeply held convictions and absolute stubbornness (after all, who wants to always automatically admit that they’re wrong?), but it’s absolutely necessary to put in the effort to challenge them.

And perhaps you’ll be met with some judgment, some scathing retaliation that you’re being oversensitive and their words and thoughts are innocuous. But you’re not being oversensitive; you are exerting your rights: your right to speak your mind and your moral obligation to correct what is unjust.

Or maybe it’ll be silence. And sometimes that’s good; perhaps they realize what they’ve done and out of shame, they cannot find the words to apologize or correct themselves. Don’t let any of that deter you. Continue to correct others and overcome those fears you have of being seen as “uptight.”

Of course, I have to admit that I sometimes do hold a brief moment of resentment and a sort of grudge against the people who call me out for some things, but when I rethink about my reasons behind this hostility, I realize that it’s only because of my embarrassment out of realizing that I am wrong, that I should be more careful with what I do or say. Sometimes, I, like many others, don’t come to that realization, and pass off the person as being rather petulant and simply overreacting. But you should always, always fight for those potential moments of cognizance. I’m still not sure though. Is this a choose-your-battle type of situation, where there are times when it’s just not worth it? Or should the term “always” be absolute, without loopholes or exceptions?