Hollywood studios are fighting over the rights for some of the best podcasts around, but which are the best fits for the small screen?

Last year, true crime was the biggest thing in podcasting. Now the medium is taking it to another level, with a string of podcasts being turned into TV shows. Jessica Williams and Phoebe Robinson’s brilliant podcast 2 Dope Queens has already hit HBO in the US, creepy online dating tale Dirty John is in production and Pod Save America from Obama’s smart-talking former scriptwriters will come to HBO as part of their mid-term coverage. But which podcasts should be the next to make it to the small screen?

Ear Hustle

Life inside San Quentin’s prison is the antithesis of the edgy but ultimately playful world’s of Orange Is The New Black and Prison Break. A glimpse into what it’s really like behind bars would make a shocking but moving TV show. Finding a happy ending might be tricky when prisoners are talking about how cell mates spend every night threatening to kill them, but Ear Hustle for the eyes (Eye Hustle, if you will) would be as gritty as it comes. If narrators Earlonne Woods (serving 31 years to life) and Antwan Williams, who’s been in prison since he was 18, remain as warm and appealing as they are on a podcast, TV could make stars out of them.

Listen closely: why Hollywood has become obsessed with podcasts Read more

Athletico Mince

Football’s parallel universe would make the best Saturday afternoon sports show ever. The hilarious rambles of Bob Mortimer and Andy Dawson provide the perfect relief from posturing punditry and their wares would easily translate to TV. OK, so there’s very little football left in it, but who cares when the Mince can dish up the latest from Steve McLaren’s Hair Island. Chuck in a few match predictions from Peter Beardsley, a fans’ phone-in and a voiceover shouting “Gooooal” and get ready to crown the Saint and Greavsie of the new millennium.

Facebook Twitter Pinterest Jon Ronson Photograph: Alamy

The Butterfly Effect With Jon Ronson

Move over The Deuce, Ronson’s podcast about the evolution of the porn industry would make fascinating TV. Even if the telly version just focused on how German tech geek-turned porn king Fabian Thylmann came to dominate the world of adult entertainment there’d be enough scope for a great story. But what would be even more fascinating would be Ronson’s unglamorous exposé of how porn stars fall out of favour in those “fallow” years between popular search terms like teen and – hideous acronym incoming – MILF. Ronson’s sensitive storytelling would really come to life with the visuals to match.

My Dad Wrote A Porno

If BBC Three and ITV2 don’t start a bidding war for the rights to this millennial juggernaut of a podcast, there’s something wrong with the world. Pots-and-pans saleswoman Belinda Blumenthal would waste no time setting up her own casting couch and yet more smut would ensue as actors queue up to audition to play the “unspeakably beautiful” heroine. Daisy Ridley and Charlotte Crosby are fans, but whoever gets the part would have to be broadminded to say the least as scenes of naked horse box romps and lusty behaviour at sales conferences are guaranteed.

The Orbiting Human Circus (of the Air)

One of the weirdest podcasts out there, Neutral Milk Hotel’s Julian Koster aural variety show would be a challenge for programme makers. Koster and his mysterious broadcasts from the top of the Eiffel Tower is an assault on the ears (in a good way), so you can only imagine what it would do to the eyes. Come to think of it, a show that’s like Stranger Things meets The Greatest Showman could be amazingly bad or everyone’s new telly obsession.

The Butterfly Effect With Jon Ronson

Move over The Deuce, Ronson’s podcast about the evolution of the porn industry would make fascinating TV. Even if the telly version just focused on how German tech geek-turned porn king Fabian Thylmann came to dominate the world of adult entertainment there’d be enough scope for a great story. But what would be even more fascinating would be Ronson’s unglamorous exposé of how porn stars fall out of favour in those “fallow” years between popular search terms like teen and – hideous acronym incoming – MILF. Ronson’s sensitive storytelling would really come to life with the visuals to match.

Facebook Twitter Pinterest Jonathan Goldstein of Heavyweight Photograph: Lem Lattimer

Heavyweight

Jonathan Goldstein’s mission to revisit people’s regrets “like a therapist with a time machine” is podcast gold and would make a cracking low-key documentary. Moments where lives went wrong, from lending Moby some CDs to being hit by a car, are crying out for some soft focus interviews and long shots of subjects looking out of sun-dappled windows.

The Nod

It would be too simplistic to suggest that Britanny Luse and Eric Giddings could be the new Will & Grace. Or even the new Karen and Jack. But they need to bring The Nod to Netflix. The hosts’ friendly rivalry gives rise to many an important debate and their “Good For The Blacks?” strand could stand alone as a panel show in which the merits of Drake, The Bachelorette and Prince Harry and Meghan Markle’s relationship are thrashed out.

From Dirty John to S-Town: the 25 best podcast episodes of 2017 Read more

Missing Richard Simmons

There’s both joy and intrigue in the tale of the fitness instructor who inspired his Lycra-clad disciples with mantras like: “Sweat is just fat crying” but then disappeared, leaving no trace. Simmons’ story would make a bleak comedy in a world as hyper-colourful and shiny as The Good Place, particularly if he’s sitting in luxury laughing at all the people who are trying to track him down. Put Steve Carell in a pink toweling robe and pass him a Kale Martini and he could slip right into the role.

The Guilty Feminist

Surely the time for an edgy, female-led discussion show is now, so the Guilty Feminists should wave their placards until it gets commissioned. Deborah Frances-White and her razor sharp guests have so much funny material they’d be a post-watershed delight. Confessions such as “I’m a feminist, but I once worked with a man so handsome I secretly hoped people would think I’d slept my way into the job” could make this lot the Loose Women de la nuit.

The Joe Rogan Experience

What Graham Norton and Jonathan Ross need right now is a rival who will shake things up. One who’ll let their guests talk for three hours straight. One who won’t stop them when they want to go into detail about their experience with ayahuasca or love for mixed martial arts. And one who’ll challenge them to a cage fight if the mood takes him. Rogan could not just revolutionise the Friday night sofa chat show, but rip it up and throw the couch out of the window.