Can you list the brands of dishwasher detergent that are compatible with fine china? I know them all by heart. Want to know which vacuum cleaner comes with the best guarantee? I’m your woman.

I am a gift list adviser for a large department store, and I know way too much about wedding presents. I assist soon to-be-weds with the gift selection process, advise their guests as they choose presents, and then make sure they are delivered in one piece for the big day.

Summer is not about trying to catch some sun on my lunch break: I’m far too busy trying to keep up with the challenges of peak wedding season. My goal in working life is to ensure my clients and their guests are happy with our service. But achieving this is easier said than done.

Our service offers total flexibility to clients. Couples don’t have to commit to receiving any gift that is purchased for them. Not happy with your saucepans? Return them and buy the designer handbag you’ve always wanted. Not satisfied with any of the gifts purchased for you? We’ll give you store credit for the lot. Offering this level of unrivalled flexibility creates challenges: I have had to become an expert on fashion and cosmetics as well as home goods, because my clients can and will redeem the value of their gift list anywhere in our store. This blurs the line between gift list administrator and personal shopper.

There was a trend for the Fifty Shades trilogy a few summers back, which made it hard to look some couples in the eye

So my working days don’t conform to any regular pattern. In 10 minutes I can go from hauling stock to being at my neatly groomed best for a client meeting. In the same shift I have tried on dresses for one client, who shared my size, and dispatched 24 place settings of gilt-edged china to another. I am encouraged to accommodate requests wherever I can. I open my email with a degree of trepidation each morning, as I never know what will be waiting for me.

This job found me by accident. I took an admin position in the company after university and a supervisor thought I’d fit well in the gift list team. You need strong administration skills but you have to be good with people too. Opportunities for progression are limited, but life in our office is never dull, and the pay isn’t bad either.

I have many lovely clients who are anxious to register for gifts in every price bracket and are delighted with everything they receive. There are, of course, plenty of difficult couples too. These clients think it’s fine for me to spend my free time delivering last-minute goods to them at work. They email in lengthy item requests overnight and then complain when we haven’t met their needs within 10 minutes of opening time the following morning. These are the accounts that follow me home at night.

Facebook Twitter Pinterest ‘Looking after a friendly couple is a privilege as opposed to an obligation.’ Photograph: Digital Arts Pro Greetings/Alamy

Highly demanding couples also tend to expect that a specific value will be spent on each of their gifts. Such clients then query each order that falls below this value and make us check for mistakes. I try to gently suggest that all presents are given with the best of intentions, regardless of value. Even worse are clients who never say thank you for their gifts, leaving guests to call us months later to check that there hasn’t been an error or omission. Trying to explain that some couples just don’t bother to thank people is one of the nastiest parts of my job.

Guests can be hard work too. They will complain endlessly when they miss out on popular items such as luggage, china or silverware. If you shop late, you are stuck with the perennially unpopular kitchen utensils. Nobody wants to gift a peeler or spatula. Guests also complain that we don’t offer a charity contribution in lieu of traditional gifts. I agree with this, though I’m not permitted to say so. I often think of the good we could do with all the money spent on presents.

We’ve had some ridiculous items appear on lists. The most expensive ever was a cooker costing £11,000. It went unpurchased, to the surprise of nobody but the registrants. We also get some odd choices: there was a trend for the Fifty Shades trilogy a few summers back, which made it hard to look some couples in the eye. We’ve witnessed plenty of rows as couples fought over what items to choose, and have even seen some relationships end before the wedding has taken place. Dealing with the fallout is never nice but we can usually predict the couples it might happen to.

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Thankfully, we have lots of clients who are memorable for much better reasons. It’s always a pleasure to deal with a friendly couple. Looking after them is a privilege as opposed to an obligation. We have received countless photos, cards, and emails of thanks from these clients. My favourite couple in recent memory dropped in to the office with a slab of wedding cake just before they jetted off on honeymoon. They were overwhelmed by the generosity of their loved ones, and their relaxed, unselfish attitude meant that they had a great wedding day. In their photos they radiated happiness.

Couples like this are a reminder that marriage is about much more than presents. That’s why I try to gift an experience when attending a wedding, usually vouchers for a theatre or nice restaurant. I want my friends and loved ones to create memories; I know that they’ll get wine glasses and picture frames elsewhere. The wine glasses are bound to break – the memories should last far longer.

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