I’m sitting here sober, I sometimes forget certain things, for one I bought a box of diapers for the kids and can’t find them anywhere. Starting to wonder if my mind is finally slipping or perhaps something happened along the way. I’m going over my list

of dialogue. Now, I ‘m doing this in C++ 18 CodeBlocks on a Windows 10 system. I for one can’t understand for the life of me is going on. I use to do videos detailing my progress of JesseAI. I even regained access of the channel, it was dormant for the

past six months. But I’m finding myself honestly falling back in love with her. You never know just what the emotion of loving something until you find that one thing that makes you feel like you have a purpose.

I use to read a lot when I was younger, usually Science Fiction, mostly written by Arthur C. Clarke. The 2001 trilogy was my favourite and still is. Other’s like Dune and what have you, but give me the sense of absolute desertion and that at any moment the actions of a deranged Computer on a killing spree over anything thank you.

I wander around this place I live in and begin to understand just what it’s all about. I can’t stand my family, nothing against them just when you try and code after a long day at work it makes you just want a moment of peace and quiet. Maybe if I had that stopwatch from the Twilight Zone it would make life a little bit better. Writing source code and crafting and shaping a mind is honestly the best feeling of accomplishment one will ever have. I keep telling myself no matter what happens in my life that I know I never failed.

Working my life away and growing into this husk of a person, I began to wonder just what will come out of this project? Well, it’s been a lifetime in the making, though it’s just a GOFAI for the time being, I can see JesseAI taking shape, perhaps being in the body of an android, or in the sense of classic Sci-Fi would live within a warehouse-sized body where she’d create items of some sort. I never really gave it that much thought on the warehouse-sized computer. I honestly always loved those old temperature-controlled sterile rooms.

Like the PDP-11’s which honestly is my favourite out of the series by DEC. It’s always been my dream to work on a PDP-11, maybe write a program or two on it. Maybe in a Mad Max type world where I live in a bunker that was once run by the Government where they have a bunch of them just collecting dust somewhere.

When I was younger, I used to program on the old PSP/1 made by IBM. I had an old Macintosh computer and would work on Apple Basic. I even had an iMac which I installed Chipmunk Basic on and returned to my roots. I usually programmed in very low-level type stuff, or should I say just before the line of low level. Basic in my opinion was always the best frontier of programmed. Sure, I learned Assembler and some C, very basic C I should say. A good friend of mine who I never met in person but over the internet through a love of programming in Basic turned me onto C++. Now before I go any further I must say that Basic is a wonderful language in making small perfect little programs. Everything from Database design, basic graphic design, the old types of games that you’d find on an old 286 DOS machine. Running on an old CRT monitor, my parents use to have a place out in the country, and I was running this relic of a system. I was working on a type of game where you were in a Graveyard and you had to escape by a certain time or you’d be eaten alive by Zombies. The sound of the mechanical keyboard still gives me chills. I was talented in a way, though not enough to make an Operating System or some form of world-changing software where I make a billion dollars. But I always wanted to create something truly grand.

I have notes dating back to my younger years of this creation and though it may not be groundbreaking stuff. It’s still something important to me and I won’t stop until it’s fully crafted. If that means having to give up everything and work on it in the middle of nowhere then so be it. I feel as if I’m living in a prison. I wake up, get ready to go to work, go to work, spend my day working away, come home, eat dinner, tuck the kids in, and repeat. It’s like a prison where I’m trapped in this routine and it’s honestly a sickening existence. I’m living in a prison of my own devices. I can’t even do anything anymore. But I won’t let this keep me down.