I just went to the store for some cigarettes and wine. Elaine is dead. She was found in an abandoned house and no cause of death was given. What. The. Hell.

I’ve had quite a few drinks and I’ve been trying to figure out what the hell is happening to me. What happpened that night and why is Elaine dead? Why and how is any of this happening? I have no control over anything anymore. It can’t all be coincidence can it? It can’t be just a bunch of really bad things happening all at once after that night. . This week there have been three dead birds and two dead cat in front of my house and a suicide three doors down. I didn’t ever really know him but when he was outside he always waved when I drove by. I never knew his name. The old people still wave at me and they stare intently either until I get the green light or as I go by. Although I’m getting used to it it still scares the hell out of me and no matter how much I talk about confronting them I’m still scared and I can’t.

I want my old life back so badly. I’ll tell you a little but about myself since you’ve had the patience to read through this madness. I’m just a regular guy who until recently was in sales. I don’t want to tell you what I sold because I don’t want anyone trying to get in touch with me. I value my privacy and I really don’t want anyone ending up where I am now. Let’s just say I made pretty decent money and did pretty damn well for a single thirty something year old guy.

I bought a small house a few years ago that I share with my dog Zoey. She is my favorite thing on Earth and until recently has been nothing but mine. She pretty well avoids me now, watching the front door all the time.

I used to have a few really good friends but not so much anymore. We used to hang out here quite a bit but after all this stuff started happening I decided I don’t want them to see me like this or somehow have something happen to them. And after I talked to one of my friends about this stuff and having him blow me off like he did I don’t really want to talk to any of them about it. I know I need help but I don’t know where or who I can go to to get it. All in all I had been living a pretty damn good and happy life until I saw that man. That’s kind of gone now. I’m trying to adapt but it’s been awful. The whole thing has been awful.

I think that’s about it for tonight.