In 1985, an American photojournalist covering the Afghan-Soviet war snapped a quick picture of a young girl in a refugee camp. National Geographic then printed that picture on the cover of their magazine and it quickly became the single most iconic image of the entire conflict, as well as one of the most recognizable photographs of the late 20th century. All of this happened without the young girl's knowledge or consent. She just went on living the stoic life of a refugee while the rest of the world cashed in on her face.

And aspiring actresses everywhere were privately jealous that her headshot was superior to theirs.

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I mention this because I may be the only person who knows exactly how that poor girl feels. Just as that "Afghan Girl" unwittingly became synonymous with human atrocity thanks to a single photograph, so too has this "American Dreamboat" unwittingly become synonymous with casual stupidity. I discovered recently that hundreds of websites all over the Western world feature my face, pressed hard against the driver's side window of a Toyota Camry (Limited Edition), staring at a set of keys locked hopelessly inside.