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Got a consumer complaint? If you want to resolve your problem quickly, then never use these five words.

But if you do, you'll spend an average of 8.3 minutes more on the phone. And you may never fix the problem, say experts.

To find the words, speech analytics solution provider CallMiner combed through its database to determine what people were saying. The results were shocking. (And parents, now is a good time to click on the next story. The language may not be suitable for all audiences.)

"We’ve noticed that customer sentiment has increasingly become angrier," says Jeff Gallino, CallMiner's CTO. "It was greatly impacting customer experience, agent performance, brand reputation — and more."

The list is as troubling as it is instructive. It highlights the rage customers have been feeling lately, but it also illuminates a path to a better resolution.

When any of these words are used in a call, here's what it means:

A call will last on average 8.3 minutes longer than when the words aren't used.

Consumers may not get their desired solution.

The words create a "hostile work environment" that can eventually harm the mental health of employees, according to Gallino.

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What are the five words you should never use when you have a complaint?

So what are the five words you shouldn't use? (One more warning before we continue — mature content ahead.)

"Profanity is a huge indicator that some part of the operation is falling short – and in turn, that the outcome of the call is going to be worse," says Gallino.

Here are the words, along with their frequency:

1. God d**n: 37%

2. F**k: 23%

3. Bulls**t: 22%

4. P*ssed: 11%

5. B**ch: 6%

To arrive at this list of words, CallMiner analyzed more than 82 million calls between customers and agents. The company wanted to determine the root causes and potential solutions to the growing problem in order to improve customer service.

These aren't occasional F-bombs thrown into the conversation in a moment of frustration.

"What is particularly alarming is that 87% of calls with customers using profanity contain profanity throughout the duration of the call," says Gallino.

In other words, we're talking about a sustained barrage of angry, coarse language.

When customers swear at contact center agents, it can have long-lasting repercussions. No wonder the average annual turnover rate for agents in U.S. contact centers ranges between 30% and 45%, according to The Quality Assurance & Training Connection. That's more than double the average for all occupations in the U.S.

Call center employees leave their jobs because of abusive calls and low job satisfaction, according to CallMiner.

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The two reasons customers are so angry

Why do people launch into profanity-laced tirades? Why do they use these five words? There are two main reasons identified by CallMiner.

1. Customers don’t feel that companies appreciate them or value their time. CallMiner's research suggested long wait times or having to repeat all the same information over and over again across contact channels was a key source of frustration among customers. "Failure to resolve a problem in one call also leads customers to believe that they are not a priority, or that the organization lacks the ability to handle even the most basic of issues," says Gallino.

2. Customers don't feel as though they are being treated as individuals. The CallMiner research also showed that when contact center agents rely on scripts, they tend to ask questions with no relevance to the current situation. That further irritates the customer. "Finally, when agents don’t know the right questions to ask or are incapable of answering customer questions, this indicates to the customer that they are not being taken seriously and their concerns are not a priority," adds Gallino.

Neither of these problems is new, of course. But the research suggests they're getting worse, as companies continue to outsource their call center operations or force their employees to use scripts in every interaction. Put differently, perhaps the anger is justified.

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Advice for getting your complaint resolved

"Profanity is not going to help you reach a solution quickly or smoothly," says Gallino.

He says the burden is on the business, not the customer, to offer efficient and effective customer service. That way, no situation ever escalates to the point where the customer is throwing F-bombs around.

"Contact center agents need to be able to de-escalate volatile situations – assisting consumers more efficiently and proactively," he adds.

There are actually far more effective ways of getting a resolution. I discuss these with some regularity on my nonprofit consumer advocacy site.

Stay off the phone. In most cases, a phone call is the least efficient way of solving a problem. The reason: While a company can record your conversation, you can't. So there's no record of the call. Send an email or text message to the company; at least then both sides have a complete record. (The "contact us" form doesn't always provide you a copy of your outgoing email, so use it with caution and always keep a backup.)

Remain calm at all times. If you must call, take a deep breath beforehand. If things don't go your way, politely end the call and take a moment to collect your thoughts. Never get on the phone angry.

Speak the King's English. Now you have a measurable, statistically valid reason for minding your Ps and Qs. Start swearing, and you'll probably spend an extra 10 minutes on the phone and not get the resolution you want.

If it doesn't work, appeal in writing. I publish the names, numbers and email addresses of the executive contacts at all the major U.S. companies on my consumer advocacy site.

I'll probably start showing this article to the consumers who ask me for help. A quick look at our database shows 25 consumers have dropped an F-bomb in 2019. "God d*mn" was only used four times in the same period of time, but Bulls*it was invoked a total of 15 times. And mind you, these are emails — not phone calls. That's premeditated swearing.

By the way, I can't believe someone had to do a study on this. I mean, come on. Don't parents teach their kids manners? And now we have to come up with a consumer equivalent of the Seven Dirty Words just in order to get the customer service we deserve?

Something is wrong — very wrong — when we have to remind consumers to be polite. But we live in strange times.