The sudden and dramatic personality shift of Blink-182's Tom DeLonge is one of the greatest mysteries in modern music, second only to the truth about Kurt Cobain's suicide and the identity of the blind goblin responsible for dressing Miley Cyrus.

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DeLonge went from a goofy rock star famous for catchy songs and juvenile antics to an aloof world musician obsessed with space and global unity in less than a year. Suspiciously, this change came right after DeLonge quit Blink-182 in the middle of a tour and subsequently dropped off the face of the Earth for about 10 months. I submit the only possible explanation is that he was stolen by aliens, and they either expanded his consciousness with celestial technology or replaced him with a stardust clone to try to prepare the world for their arrival, like Klaatu in The Day the Earth Stood Still. I'll go one step further and say that Tom DeLonge is Klaatu, albeit the charming and likeable one from the 1951 original and not the Keanu Reeves corpse-eyed mandroid from the 2008 remake.

Far-fetched, you say? Stand back while I connect these dots and prepare to have your mind blown.