Born in Canada, Anna Paquin, 37, was raised in New Zealand. Aged nine, she was cast in Jane Campion’s 1993 film The Piano, and won an Oscar for her performance. Between 2008 and 2014 she starred in the HBO series True Blood with Stephen Moyer; they married in 2010, have twins and live in Los Angeles. Paquin has a role in Martin Scorsese’s new movie The Irishman and stars in Tell It To The Bees, which is in cinemas now.

When were you happiest?

I don’t think there’s a single moment. Every day that you wake up and your family is healthy and OK is a daily gratitude and happiness for me.

What is your greatest fear?

I don’t like spiders.

What is your earliest memory?

I swear that I can remember being in my mum’s baby carrier, and what her hair looked like from that angle, which is apparently not possible.

Which living person do you most admire, and why?

I am really loving the badass co-captain of the US soccer team, Megan Rapinoe. She is exceptionally hard-working and talented, and stands up for what she believes.

What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?

I am deeply self-loathing. I get really bad social anxiety.

What is the trait you most deplore in others?

Lying.

Aside from a property, what’s the most expensive thing you’ve bought?

My husband and I own some art, but we are not huge spenders.

What makes you unhappy?

Reading a newspaper.

What do you most dislike about your appearance?

There are loads of things I dislike, but let’s be that generation that doesn’t focus so much on women’s looks.

What did you want to be when you were growing up?

I already had a career when I was growing up.

What was the best kiss of your life?

My husband – but I have been with him for 12 years, so there’s not just one.

If you could go back in time, where would you go?

It would be fun to go to Woodstock – there were some extraordinary musicians.

How do you relax?

I am not very good at relaxing. I like relaxing that involves really aggressive exercise: I do CrossFit.

What single thing would improve the quality of your life?

If it took less than 14 hours to fly to New Zealand, that would be great. A super-duper-fast plane would be cool.

What do you consider your greatest achievement?

I hope that’s yet to come. My Oscar? That was a combination of Holly Hunter being an amazing actress, Jane being an extraordinary director and me being in the right place at the right time. I had no idea what I was doing. It’s given me this amazing life, but it’s not the highlight of my career.

What keeps you awake at night?

My children, because they come with me wherever I go.

What song would you like played at your funeral?

I don’t have a favourite song, but I will definitely give it some thought, so no one’s arguing about it when I die.

What is the most important lesson life has taught you?

You are not in control of anything.