For years, Gilmore Girls has inspired young women around the world with positive messages about love and life.

No character was perhaps more inspiring than the studious and straight-laced Rory Gilmore. Throughout ups and downs in her life, Rory persevered through it all by making both good decisions and bad.

Here are ten lessons we can learn about life from Rory, whether it was through positive traits or her mistakes.

1. It’s okay to be an introvert

In a world where introverts tend to get overlooked, Rory taught us that it was okay to be book-loving girl who would rather listen to music during lunch than discuss homecoming with classmates.

While Rory’s attempts to socialize with her peers turns out to be disastrous in “Like Mother Like Daughters” (Season 2 Episode 7), the overall message isn’t that socializing is bad.

Rather, it’s the lesson that sticking to who you are will yield the best results. Rory is perfectly comfortable with only having a few close friends rather than a dozen acquaintances, and it’s great to see her forge her own path, especially in such a conforming environment like high school.

Speaking as an introvert myself, it was totally inspiring and self-affirming to see an introverted main character painted as positive trait, instead of something to be mocked.

2. Take criticism with a grain of salt

In “Blame Booze and Melville” (Season 5 Episode 21), Rory receives a critical review of her internship from Mitchum Hunztberger. This might be the first time Rory’s ever been given something other than glowing praise when it comes to her writing, and she takes it pretty hard (by stealing a yacht, no less).

Rory believes him without question, without considering that even though Mitchum is one of the top guys in journalism, his opinion is just that — one guy’s opinion. The way she bounces back the next season is completely inspiring, going after her dreams with a renewed sense of determination.

The fact that the editor of the Stanford Gazette loved her just goes to show that you win some, you lose some, and you can’t let that stop you.

3. Follow your passions

From the very beginning, Rory has had a career in journalism in her mind. In “The Lorelais’ First Day At Chilton” (Season 1 Episode 2), she tells the headmaster without hesitation that she wants to major in journalism and become an oversees correspondent like Christiane Amanpour.

From that moment forward, we see Rory constantly working hard towards that goal, including studying, reading books, joining clubs, and taking internships. Eventually, she gets a job as a journalist for a political campaign, and even ends up meeting Amanpour by chance.

That’s not to say that everyone’s dreams will automatically come true, or that goals should never change.

But it is commendable that Rory had a goal, and understood that hard work was necessary to work towards it, instead of expecting it to come without a price, or not even trying at all.

4. Don’t be passive in relationships

If the whole Dean-Jess saga from Season 2 to Season 3 taught us one thing, it’s that being passive in a relationship doesn’t ever work. Relationships are built on the foundation of communication, something Rory hadn’t realized until it was too late.

She ignored her feelings with Jess for so long, living in denial even after kissing him. Everything continued to fester until it reached a boiling point, and Dean had to make her choice for her in “They Shoot Gilmores, Don’t They?” (Season 3 Episode 7).

Her passivity continued while dating Jess for the majority of Season 3, refusing to confront Jess and communicate with him until he had already moved out of town. Most of her relationship problems could have been solved much earlier had she just learned to communicate properly.

5. Applying to colleges can be exciting

Everyone hates applying to colleges. At least, that’s the way I saw it when I was in high school. But Rory’s excitement at going to college was positively infectious. She regarded college as an opportunity to study what she loved and deepen her passions, instead of what most of us saw as an opportunity for even more studying and even more homework.

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