Some people see the world as a collection of various ethnicities and races, but for me, it’s not about that. I don’t care if you’re black, white, or purple, because where most people see skin tone, I actually see right through the skin to people’s bones. It’s actually really scary and I don’t know how to stop it. Can anybody help me?

When people try to tell me about the discrimination they’ve faced, I’m always like “Hey, you’re just another talking skeleton to me, baby, just like everyone else” and they’re usually like, “What are you saying? I’m telling you something really vulnerable and serious.” But seriously, that’s exactly what I see when I look around me. Doctors can’t figure it out. I’m not ever sure they believe me.

The world I live in is post-racial and also decidedly post-flesh. I look around me and all I see is a sea of human bones going about their business. Sure, one of those sets of bones might tell me that another set of bones is beating them up for no reason other than the color of their skin, but I can’t integrate that concept into my reality when I literally don’t see skin. I’m just describing my worldview here and it is entirely devoid of skin color—and also flesh, blood, and muscle.

I love all people equally, though love is too strong a term, considering it still kinda freaks me out to look at all these frightening skulls that walk around me like animated corpses. It never becomes less jarring. Seriously, I don’t get used to it. Every day is like waking up to a nightmare.

But at least it’s a kind of utopian nightmare where everyone is equal. Call me naïve, but if everyone could see the world like me, we might be more at peace as a society, and no one would have to try to explain to me how their appearance affects the way they are treated on a daily basis. I really don’t get it, to be honest. Don’t even bother going into it. I can only see your beautiful bones. And no, I didn’t ask for this. I’m slowly realizing that I am cursed.

So whenever people are portraying the world in black and white and using divisive terminology to describe our differences, all I can say is, “Sorry, I don’t see that shit. It’s all just bones to me.” Even when people tell me that I am a privileged white woman with long flowing blond hair, all I see in the mirror is a freakish, fleshless grin. Can somebody make it stop? Please?