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John Goodman in 1991's "King Ralph." (Universal Pictures)

President Donald Trump's critics like to say he's acting like a king. But if that's the president's goal, he's not doing it right.

For a lesson in true American kingly behavior, Trump should check out the Times of London advertisement offered up Wednesday by a man who presents himself as Allan V. Evans. The Coloradan claims "the Throne and Sovereign Crown of Great Britain" is rightfully his.

"TAKE HEED AND REJOICE, all Welshman [sic], Scots, Manx, all Britons, and all citizens of this Great Nation called Great Britain," the paid announcement states, "that the light of freedom and egalitarianism shall be promoted and promulgated, that democracy and all democratic values will be promoted, and that Lady Britania [sic] who has contributed so much to the culture and history of the world shall be renewed and made great once again; for the Legend was not a myth but was indeed true, and more than a mere Tolkien story, that the men of the West are now returning and now is the time of the return of the King."

You can read the entire ad in this tweet:

An American has taken out a big ad in the Times to say he's the rightful king & intends to seize power. pic.twitter.com/ba1iQUyGer — DavidMapstone (@DavidMapstone) March 1, 2017

The Times has offered no comment about the advertisement in its pages. We don't yet have much information on who Mr. Evans actually is, but Britain's The Independent made clear it's tracking the situation. "We'll obviously be keeping a close eye on this one," the newspaper winkingly stated.

If the staff at The Independent or anyone else wants to know how this will turn out, they can start by putting "King Ralph" on their movie-night list. Watch the trailer below.