See email below - in equal parts hilarious and tragic.While the ranks are very different, this wholly follows the example of 'Sarnies' Cowan...No wonder that,Perhaps the Army should advertise a vacancy for Officers' Coffee wallah at 4th Battalion REME?...---------- Forwarded message ----------From: REDACTEDDate: 20 November 2015 at 08:50Subject: FW: 20151119-Officers'_Mess_Coffee-Adjt_7ParaRHATo: REDACTEDAll,To give you a warm fuzzy feeling that your life could be worse - please see the bottom email.Currently officers’ coffee is the number 1 issue in some regiments...Regards,AdjutantDII (F):________________________________________From: REDACTEDSent: 20 November 2015 08:35To: REDACTEDSubject: FW: 20151119-Officers'_Mess_Coffee-AdjtI reckon we get the subbies onto coffee straight away.________________________________________From: REDACTEDSent: 19 November 2015 17:57To: REDACTEDSubject: FW: 20151119-Officers'_Mess_Coffee-AdjtYou thought you were micro managed________________________________________From: REDACTEDSent: 19 November 2015 17:44To: REDACTEDSubject: FW: 20151119-Officers'_Mess_Coffee-AdjtWouldn’t you just love a posting to 4 Bn REME.Sergeant XXX XXXX AGC(SPS) | Regimental Accountant | XXXXX________________________________________From: REDACTEDSent: 19 November 2015 16:53To: REDACTEDSubject: FW: 20151119-Officers'_Mess_Coffee-AdjtNext time blokes are whinging about the Mess, it could be worse; read on,WO2(SQMS) ….________________________________________From: REDACTEDSent: 19 November 2015 16:28To: REDACTEDSubject: FW: 20151119-Officers'_Mess_Coffee-AdjtThis is the standard I expect from now on at our management meetings. I am partial to pink wafers and party rings.________________________________________From: REDACTEDSent: 19 November 2015 16:16To: REDACTEDSubject: 20151119-Officers'_Mess_Coffee-Sir, All,It seems I’ve been too soft on the Subbies over the last year. Please see below for changes that I intend to make prior to my departure.Kind regards,AdjtKing Crow – Stand by!________________________________________From: xxxxxxxxxxSent: 10 November 2015 11:11To: xxxxxxxxxxxxxxSubject: 20151110-Officers' Coffee Adjt-OImportance: HighSubbies (and Capts who from time to time may have to stand in)Officers' CoffeeHowever basic and simple you may think making Officers' Coffee is, it is something that needs to be done correctly otherwise you look like idiots. It is something you are failing at, especially when people are away and others are asked/not asked to cover.The CO had to wait for some coffee this morning as a second jug hadn't been put on - This is completely unacceptable.Just to clarify a few things so everyone is sure of what is expected:1. The most junior officer is responsible for Officers' coffee. Until Feb 16 this is 2Lt [redacted]. He is to perform the duty each day that coffee is on. If he is unavailable he is to approach the next junior officer available to stand in for him.2. Ensure that there is always enough coffee. Never run out. Taylors is a good choice for coffee and don't scrimp on biscuits. A selection of the following always goes down well: jaffa cakes, choc malted milks, choc hob nobs or digestives and as a treat party rings or pink wafers. It is important not to run out of coffee or biscuits as occasionally I have to put on a pot of coffee and a plate of biscuits when hosting officers that visit BHQ.3. Put the other officers before yourself. Make sure you gauge how much coffee to put on and when. Make sure the milk jug and sugar bowl always have enough in. If someone brings in cake ensure there is a knife and paper towels handy. Don't wait to be prompted.4. Clearing up. Ensure the kitchen area and Harris room are left clean and tidy. This means: coffee machine switched off and cleaned, cups all cleaned (no coffee stains inside) and hung back on rack or placed back on tray. Coffee machine table wiped, kitchen sink and draining board wiped, table in Harris room wiped.I'm annoyed that I even have to write this. Get a grip and do the duty properly. You don't have to do it for that long so do it right. When the CO sees an organised and proactive subaltern at coffee she can presume that you are organised and proactive in how you run your Pl.Enough said.Names and positions removed by MOD Edit - Guns