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Always Be Clothing

New Heroes for a New Era

Lady Hairbag: What’s in her magic bag oh it’s hair

Chef Paradox: Sent from the future to marry his grandfather’s stew

Dr. Bass: Is he a fish? Is he a guitar? Is he a professor? Is he a spy? Is he a ninja? HE IS ALL OF THE AFOREMENTIONED THINGS

The Chuckler: Haunted by unspeakable memories that are triggered by the sound of laughter

Horse Patterson: A horse. Reluctant chosen successor to a throne of some description. Father of 5 human children.

Generic Female: But her co-star is, like, a badass dude, so you’ll wanna watch the show

Sandwich bandit: You weren’t gonna eat the whole thing anyway

Gary: An average joe by day AND ALSO BY NIGHT

COPYBOT: The most sophisticated copywriting robot to come out of the 1950s. Wrote this whole terrible thing.

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