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Something about this ad for a Middleboro Thai massage parlor on Postix seems a little bit….off…

“Let our sweet Asian team make you feel good.”

Oh, I bet they will. It’s either that or back to the cage.

So yea, if this isn’t the most obvious rub and tug of all time, then the Middleboro “Wellness Spa” should probably reconsider their marketing plan.

To find out we called them up spoke to a nice woman who knew at least 17 words in English. Our communication issues were large, but when I asked if they do “special massages” I was told that we’d have to speak to the masseuse. I was thinking about getting Mr. Turtlegirl a gift card for his birthday coming up, but I don’t think we’ve reached this point in our relationship. Yet.

I dunno, maybe this place is legit. If it is, they should probably come up with a different marketing plan. Ya know, because “Hot therapist women,” “fun,” and “new cute” aren’t typically ways you would market your trained therapists if it were a legit massage parlor. Because when you go to get a massage it could be done by a 400 pound cheesehog, but as long as they knew how to get the job done it would be money well spent. If you’re going to a massage parlor and your primary concern is having a hot “fun” Asian woman touching your body, you’re probably not going there because you have a cramp in your shoulder. Just sayin.

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