WOMEN'S groups have defended Rajini Narayan's suspended sentence for burning her husband to death.

They say those trapped in the "kill or be killed" world of domestic violence deserve mercy.

The Supreme Court yesterday suspended Narayan's six-year manslaughter term and released her on a three-year, $1000 good behaviour bond.

She is the third woman since 2004 to escape an immediate jail term for killing an abusive spouse.

AdelaideNow readers reacted angrily to the decision, with more than 63 per cent calling it unjust.

But Dr Elspeth McInnes, from Women Everywhere Advocating Violence Elimination, yesterday said the case highlighted the difficulties faced by those in abusive relationships.

"Domestic violence can create a belief that there is no way one can survive without resorting to lethal violence themselves," she said.

"It becomes an almost 'kill or be killed' situation, in the context of their personal history.

There will be people who say Narayan has 'got away with it', but she has lost a husband she loved, her financial support and her standing in the community - and she has suffered two decades of serious domestic abuse."

Narayan and her husband, Satish, entered into an arranged Hindu marriage in July 1986.

Three weeks later, he began physically and verbally abusing her.

The violence continued throughout their life together, with Narayan believing she deserved mistreatment for not being a "perfect wife".

In December 2008, she discovered Satish was having an affair and set him on fire with petrol and an "angel candle" given to her by a fortune teller.

She denied that it was murder, claiming she had wanted to "purify" her husband with holy flame. Narayan said she only wanted to "burn a dot on his penis" so that he would not leave her, but lost control when he called her "a fat bitch".

Jurors acquitted her of murder and found her guilty of manslaughter.

In sentencing yesterday, Justice John Sulan said there was "no doubt" that Narayan's thinking had been "unrealistic, muddled and illogical".

"For the first time in your life you had confronted your husband and found the courage to be assertive to the person who had mistreated you," Justice Sulan said.

"His response was to treat you with disdain, dismiss you and turn his back (and) you snapped."

Justice Sulan said Narayan had "deified" Satish and was "shattered" by his betrayal.

"Although it is often said that a suspended sentence is not a sentence at all ... it is wrong to regard (it) as letting an offender walk free as if he or she has not been punished," he said.

"It seems (Narayan) has suffered a great deal already."

Justice Sulan ordered she be under Correctional Services supervision for two years, and undertake psychological counselling as ordered.

Narayan fought back tears as the sentence was announced, while her eldest daughter ran to the front of the courtroom to embrace her.

Vicki Lachlan, chairwoman of the Coalition of Women's Domestic Violence Services of SA, said marriages like Narayan's were "sadly common".

"What happens is women just stay and try harder, or try to leave and face consequences like stalking and greater violence," Ms Lachlan said.

"(This sentence) is a positive message for women that shows the courts have the clarity to see that abused people are victims too," she said.

"Hopefully, women will take from this case that it's better to get out of an abusive relationship."

Originally published as Mercy for a wife pushed too far