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Lost

It's all in the presentation.

Ladies and gentlemen, app designer and programmer, Michael Ray.

"Thanks for having me. My job, as an app designer, is to imagine new ways in which people and technology can interact."

Michael, you're known for creating apps that inspire so many people to both learn and have fun. Why don't you tell us about your inspiration.

"It's available at a low, low price! Right now! Don't wait!"

No, Michael, that's not your line. There, on the prompter now.

"Oh… umm… yeah… my inspiration is to… create a playground for the mind, which is the world's sharpest 7" touch screen. Wait, sorry… The text is all… whatever, I'll just wing it…"

Yeah, tell us how you feel!

"Full. I ate kind of a big lunch with all this money you guys paid me to be here."

No, I mean, tell us how you feel about your work.

"Oh, uh… well… uh… well… uh… well, I… uh… make apps, I think?"

Yes, that's right! Now tell us how the Google Nexus 7 will help people experience your apps.

"They will… uh… I... uh... could you give me a hint?"

Think now, Michael. It's a tablet and you make apps. How are apps and tablets related?

"They're brothers."

No.

"They're sisters."

No.

"They're lovers?!"

No, Michael. What do you do with an app on a tablet?

"You kiss it."

No.

"You hug it?"

No!

"Oh, I got it! You compliment its shirt, but NOT in a way that could be perceived as flirtatious."

No! You USE it! You USE apps on tablets! You're an app designer! How do you not know this?

"I'm sorry… I can't…"

[Michael walks off stage.]

Well, let's thank app designer Michael Ray for being here.

[Smattering of applause.]

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