The truth is out there The X-Files

You know, one of the, let’s just say unintended benefits of the Trump moronarchy has been that, if you pay any kind of attention at all, you’re getting one helluva civics lesson. I’m not talking about the public civics lesson on how our government works under pressure like the televised impeachment hearings, I’m talking about laws that originally had nothing to do with Trump, and were intended for entirely different purposes, but are suddenly enjoying a renaissance of recognition and importance under His Lowness.

As has been pointed out previously by pretty much everybody with a 12th grade education, long before The Tiny Thumbs Twitler, there was another US President by the name of Richard Nixon who was also under the mistaken notion that he too was a criminal mastermind. When you look at these two in more general terms, it really is amusing to watch these two cheap hoods, stumbling around like the plot line of a Dortmunder book, running out of the store with packages of bologna and sliced cheese falling out of the pockets of their jackets. But in another wonderful example of history not (ahem) repeating itself, Tricky Dick actually played a critical role in the problems in which El Pendejo Presidente now finds himself embroiled.

Ever hear of The Impoundment Act of appropriated funds of 1974? Hell, I don’t think that one even earned a footnote in civics class. It turns out that among his other charming qualities, Nixon had the nasty habit of holding up money that congress had appropriated for things in the budget when they were earmarked for projects Nixon felt were unwise or unworthy. Since it made absolutely no sense whatsoever to leave the money just laying around, Nixon would often just turn around and spend it on something else that he liked better. This left congress tres pissed off, since the constitution gave them the power to squander away the commonweal, and Nixon was stepping on their jukes.

Sensing Nixon’s political vulnerability in the Watergate scandal, congress struck while the iron was hot, passing the Impoundment Act of 1974, which made it a crime for a president or administration to spend money appropriated by congress on anything but its intended purpose, or to withhold its timely distribution. Nixon signed it in a desperate attempt to rehabilitate his image with the Senate on his impeachment, and didn’t work. The act has just laid around for the last 45 years, collecting dust and feeling neglected, until the 2019 House dusted it off, shined it up, and pounded Donnie Depends over the head with it for his withholding of military aid to the Ukraine. There’s a symmetry here to the idea of one corrupt, bumbling American President accidentally pulling the rug out from another bumbling American President that I find heartwarming and wonderful.

But that law isn’t the only law with unintended consequences that is turning Traitor Tot’s life into an endless day trip on the River Styx in Charron’s boat. There is another, much more commonly known act of congress that is having a critical effect on the fortunes of Trump, and this one because it is being used by ordinary citizens to aid the US House of Representatives in its time of darkest need.

The Freedom Of Information Act of 1969 sprang from humble beginnings. Its original intention was to make the inner daily workings of the federal bureaucracy more easily accessible and transparent to the public. The original intention was that it would make it easier for the public to spot basic problems and inefficiencies in the way that the departments were working, so the system could be improved. I dunno, maybe it’s been used for that purpose, but it has been much more widely used to force government departments into exposing nasty little secrets about when they’ve been naughty instead of nice. And that’s what is becoming critical at this point in our history.

Since the start of the investigations into Trump, House committees have been first requesting, then demanding, then issuing subpoenas in order to obtain documents and information from various departments. The response from the Trump administration has been uniform and universal, mainly Go fuck yourselves! At which the entire process becomes bogged down in federal lawsuits, frustrating the Democrats from conducting a thorough investigation, while the Trump administration runs out the clock, laughing their asses off. And this is where the Freedom Of Information Act is playing a suddenly critical role.

Like the cavalry in a John Wayne movie, individual citizens and public watchdog groups are riding in to save the freakin’ day. They are reading the House committees requests, and then turning around and filing FOIA applications with the departments for the same information. After being told to Go fuck themselves, they are likewise turning around and filing federal lawsuits. And when the courts almost invariably side with the plaintiffs, the documents are being turned over!

Because, as it turns out, we the people have more clout in the courts than the United States House of Representatives! And for good reason. We paid for this shit! We paid the salaries of the people who put together those reports, spreadsheets, and analyses, and sent the e-mails. The paper the stuff is printed on, and the ink from the printer was purchased using a government credit card that we’re paying the interest on. And goddammit, if we want to see what our own government is spending our money on, and what kind of pecksniffery they’re up to, then we’re damn well gonna do it, and no year long Supreme Court wait bullshit! And when these groups are getting the information that they requested, the first two things they are doing are to turn copies over to the House committees, and posting the entire contents, unedited, on their public websites for the media to peruse. That’s where the latest bombshell OMB email to the DoD, confirming the hold up of the Ukrainian aid, 90 minutes after Trump talked to Zelensky came from, not a congressional committee, but an ordinary, everyday FOIA request.

The moral of the story is this, kiddies. Yes, government is slow, Yes, it’s inefficient, and cumbersome, and sloppy, and loud, and inefficient, and yes, we’d all like to turn it into another stupid Disney theme park. And yet, every once in a while, almost more by accident than by design, it actually works, and when it does, it becomes beautiful and important. So, the next time you hear on the news about some stupid, complex, wasteful bill being passed into law, take a moment to consider. Who knows? Thirty or forty years down the road, that piece of shit could help to bring down a presidency.

To know the future, look to the past. before the insanity of the 2020 election, relive the insanity of the 2016 GOP primary campaign, and the general election, to see how we got to where we are. Copies of President Evil, and the sequel, President Evil II, A Clodwork Orange are available as e-books on Amazon, at the links above. Catch up before the upcoming release of the third book in the trilogy, President Evil III: All The Presidents Fen