Here’s a weird thing that happened…

11 – Shots by each team

4 – Shots on goal by them

2 – Shots on goal by us

3 – Shots on goal by Bale

1 – Shot on goal by Giroud

1 – Shot on goal credited to Mertesacker which was probably not actually on frame and which Bale should be credited with an own goal

166 – Completed passes by them in the first half

10 – Completed passes by them in the Arsenal final third in the first half

3 – Shots by them in the first half

2 – Goals by them in the first half

75 – Completed passes by them in the second half

17 – Completed passes by them in the Arsenal final third in the second half

8 – Shots by them in the second half

229 – Completed passes by Arsenal in the first half

50 – Completed passes by Arsenal in their final third in the first half

3 – Shots by Arsenal in the first half

1 – Shots on goal by Arsenal in the first half

185 – Completed passes by Arsenal in the second half

54 – Completed passes by Arsenal in their final third in the second half

8 – Shots by Arsenal in the second half

1 – Goals by Arsenal in the second half

17 – Arsenal’s season average for aerial duels won

26 – Aerials won against Sp*rs

6 – Aerial duels won against them in the first half

20 – Yep, 20, Arsenal won 20 aerial duels in the second half

9 – of those were in the last 30 minutes, all in their half of the pitch

13 – Giroud won 13 aerial duels alone (out of 17 attempted)

9 – Duh… nine of Giroud’s aerial duels were in the second half

3.9 – That’s Giroud’s season average for aerials won

32 – That’s the number of Aerial Duels Arsenal won against Stoke (season high) except that was Stoke bombing them in at Arsenal

8 – Arsenal also only created 8 shots from passes (what we often call “key passes”) we haven’t had that few key passes since Chelsea

28 – Theo Walcott’s touches, fewer than any other player except Adebayor, Podolski, Defoe and Livermore

9 – Arsenal only made 9 tackles, tied with the fewest tackles in any game this season (Stoke, Man U)

11 – But they only needed 11 tackles to beat us back

26 – Because we attempted a crazy number of crosses, 10 more than them

19 – Number of those crosses that came from Theo, Jenks, and Ramsey

4 – And only connected on 4 – yeah, we were 4/26 on crosses

3 – They were 3/16

In conclusion, they didn’t outpass us (241 to 414), didn’t have more play in the final third (27 to 104), didn’t really even have to tackle, beat Arsenal in interceptions by just 1, didn’t out-dribble Arsenal (6/17 to 11/25), didn’t win many aerial duels (14/40), did a terrible job clearing their lines (16/33 v. 12/18), and yet they won. Because Arsenal didn’t defend the basics at all on the first goal and then decided to go on vacation for the second.

Oh, and it didn’t help that Giroud had Arsenal’s only real shot on goal, and that it came in the first half (come on, Mertesacker was trying to flick across the box), that Theo only managed 28 touches, that Wilshere dribbled 6/8 but was only 73% in his passes and 58% from the final third, and that in the end, Arsenal were reduced to a poor imitation of Blackburn Rovers as they lumped the ball up to their big center back-cum-center forward.

Once again Arsenal made a pile of shit smell like a rose.

7am