My dearest brothers and sisters,

I am writing you today concerning a most urgent matter which has required my immediate attention. Last night my dear nephew, Hyrum, dropped by our home unexpectedly with a pressing matter that he wished to discuss. He stated that he had just learned that our beloved prophet, even President Thomas S. Monson, had been summoned to a British court on allegations of fraud by former Stake President Tom Phillips, and that yesterday the Prophet had boldly and fearlessly sent a team of lawyers to respond to the summons in his behalf.

I was completely shocked by this news—not the news of the summons, for all the authorities of the Church are well aware of this issue—rather, I was shocked that my nephew had actually heard of this incident. The Church has worked very carefully, my brothers and sisters, to minimize this negative publicity in order to continue furthering the Lord’s work. Therefore, when I discovered that this news had reached my precious nephew, I was utterly astonished. I had been under the impression that our full-time Public Relations experts had successfully contained this negative news in several ways: first, by “starving” the issue and only releasing two short statements regarding the case when it became absolutely necessary; second, by making it known to the public that these allegations are nothing but “bizarre mischief” and should thus be completely ignored; and third, by making certain that our Church-owned news outlets (Deseret News and KSL) keep their news reports correct and accurate by only emphasizing the Church’s official position on these critical matters. I assured my dear nephew Hyrum that the Church was diligently working to ensure that the actual 7 fraud allegations would not be noticed, and that faithful readers across the globe will instead focus upon the senselessness of criticizing the Lord’s true Church.

Unfortunately, my nephew informed me that “everyone has heard about the summons” and that it has been receiving considerable attention in the “social media.” I was greatly disheartened by this tragic news. Dearest brothers and sisters, I have decided to write this “blog” post for the benefit of those who have already heard of the court summons. For you, I perceive it is already too late and I feel you must hear a faithful explanation regarding the fraud allegations, much like my beloved nephew.

NOTE: If any reader has not heard of the fraud allegations prior to reading this “blog” post, I ask that you promptly discontinue reading at this point, as this entirely outlandish incident is of absolutely no importance and should be completely ignored.

***

Now, for you remaining members, before we begin I wish to make an important request: If any person inquires of you regarding these issues, please be certain to refer them only to our official Church-owned news reports, such as Deseret News, KSL, and LDS Newsroom. Also, do not forget to state that the case is completely frivolous and will go nowhere, and strongly discourage the person from misusing their valuable time by looking into any of the actual 7 fraud allegations being made. And you certainly should not, under any conditions, make any reference to the news outlets that I will list below, as they are not sanctioned by the Church and thus present views which are completely irrelevant to our eternal salvation:

The Salt Lake Tribune

Official Court Summons Reports

Details from the Prosecution (Please be certain not to “click” these links! They are only provided to ensure that you are aware of examples of the news outlets which you should not view.)

The first fact I must explain, dearest members, is that Tom Phillips (the man issuing the charges) was indeed a Stake President in England, as well as the Church’s Area Controller for the British Isles and Africa and Financial Director for the Church’s U.K. corporate entities. My nephew stated that he had heard that Brother Phillips had his “calling and election made sure” through the sacred temple ordinance of the Second Anointing, which means that his exaltation has been “made sure” by an “unconditional guarantee” of the Lord. (see https://www.lds.org/ensign/1976/07/accepted-of-the-lord-the-doctrine-of-making-your-calling-and-election-sure) I explained to Hyrum that this fact clearly proves that we are living in the latter days, when “even the very elect shall be deceived.” Knowing of my vast knowledge of holy scripture, Hyrum asked me where this verse came from, so that he might read it in context. I quickly searched for the verse using the Topical Guide and then responded without hesitation that this scripture is located in the 24th chapter of Matthew. Together, we read these verses: “And many false prophets shall rise, and shall deceive many. … For there shall arise … false prophets, and shall shew great signs and wonders; insomuch that, if it were possible, they shall deceive the very elect.” (Matthew 24:11,24) Brothers and sisters, let us not be deceived by false prophets! This scripture, of course, is referring to all prophets upon the earth except those found in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. It is for this very reason we must ever be obedient and compliant to our beloved prophets, seers, and revelators, that we may not be deceived.

Now, the court summons includes 7 fraud allegations which Brother Phillips claims (wrongfully, I might add) can be conclusively proven as fraudulent in a court of law. While I cannot go into much detail presently, I will give a short explanation followed by a powerful testimony bourne of the Spirit which I shared with my beloved nephew.

The Book of Abraham is a literal translation of Egyptian papyri by Joseph Smith. The Book of Mormon was translated from ancient gold plates by Joseph Smith, is the most correct book on earth, and is an ancient historical record. Native Americans are descended from an Israelite family which left Jerusalem in 600 B.C. Joseph and Hyrum Smith were killed as martyrs in 1844 because they would not deny their testimony of the Book of Mormon. The Illinois newspaper called the Nauvoo Expositor had to be destroyed because it printed lies about Joseph Smith. There was no death on this planet prior to 6,000 years ago. All humans alive today are descended from just two people who lived approximately 6,000 years ago.

First, my nephew did some searching online and came across an article which purports to summarize each of these 7 allegations. (Dearest member, this article greatly troubled my dear nephew. I provide it here as irrefutable proof against the error of man’s philosophies.) Hyrum was concerned that these 7 allegations might have some sort of substance, and he was “clicking” the links provided in order to learn more. He was even beginning to think that this “new” information was relevant, which of course greatly alarmed me. Dearest member, do not “click” links such as these, or any other links provided therein!

After reviewing this information with my nephew, I explained that the great problem with these links is that they attempt to use logic and reason in order to understand these allegations, rather than the wisdom of God as taught through His authorized prophets upon the earth. Thus, when issues such as these arise, I frequently reiterate the inspired counsel of my beloved associate, Elder Charles Didier: “Do not look at reason, logic, or the philosophies of men and theories of the world.” (https://www.lds.org/ensign/1991/11/testimony) I asked: Do these links you are reading contain logic and reason? If so, do not look at them. I then testified to my nephew that one of the fastest ways to lose a testimony is to succumb to the ever-present and immoral temptation to look at logic and reason, which inevitably leads one down the slippery slopes of sin and toward eternal destruction and misery. Let us avoid the heartache caused by this sinister enticement and instead remain safely within the confines of the Church’s official teachings!

After I explained this to my nephew, I shared with him my unshakeable and powerful testimony of the Restored Gospel. Rather than turning to the logic and reason of the world, I faithfully turned to the sacred scriptures, leaving us with no room for doubt. I shared with Hyrum one of my favorite verses of holy writ, even the 12th verse of the 5th chapter of Alma in the Book of Mormon:

“Behold I say unto you that this is all true.” (Alma 5:12)

As we read these divinely-inspired words, our hearts began throbbing within us, tender tears welled up in our eyes, and our souls were filled with the Spirit of the Lord. We knew at that moment without a shadow of a doubt that the Church is true. From this singular verse of sacred scripture, we read the profound and faithful words written thousands of years ago by an inspired ancient prophet of the Lord, valiantly testifying that this is all true. I see no need to look any further for authoritative reassurance than this, my brothers and sisters. I encourage all members to regularly and frequently turn to this inspired verse in times of doubt, and to ponder its profound meaning rather than looking at logic, reason, or philosophies of the world. I also counsel all members everywhere to avoid any information that does not come from Church-owned news sources, magazines, or scriptures, that we may ever be safe from the great evil and destruction that await those who make the tragic mistake of questioning or scrutinizing the Church’s inspired teachings.

Dearest brothers and sisters, the Lord Jesus Christ would never establish a church that has anything to hide. Only error fears investigation. This is why I encourage all members to diligently read solely those publications which are sanctioned by the Church—that you may be free to learn the truths of the Restored Gospel whilst being protected from the misguided philosophies of the world. For the comfort of all, I solemnly declare that the truth regarding The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints will go forth boldly, nobly, and independent, till it has penetrated every continent, visited every clime, swept every country, and sounded in every ear! Of this I humbly testify.

Faithfully yours,

Elder Delaney