With its members’ unceasing joy, artistic flair and proud-to-be-me mentality, it’s hard to imagine anything more quintessentially San Francisco than the Gay Men’s Chorus.

But 37 years ago, the still-new singing group wasn’t welcome in all corners of the city. In a devastating blow that made headlines around the Bay Area, the chorus’ April 25, 1981, concert at St. Ignatius Church was canceled weeks beforehand by Archbishop John Quinn. He said the concert could be “misinterpreted” as the Catholic Church approving of homosexuality, which he considered immoral.

The chorus, which had already sold tickets and hired the Berkeley Symphony Orchestra to accompany it, argued the cancellation was a breach of contract. A Superior Court judge denied the chorus’ request for a court order directing the concert to continue, but the chorus later sued the church and settled out of court for $5,000.

Thankfully, times change, and the Gay Men’s Chorus is once again preparing for a concert at St. Ignatius Church, the first time ever it will sing in the stunningly grand church known for its terrific acoustics. This time the concert, set for Friday, is almost sure to happen.

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“We were told in no uncertain terms that any chorus that has the word ‘gay’ in its name is not allowed to sing in any Catholic churches in the city,” said Tim Seelig, artistic director of the Gay Men’s Chorus. “It was always a thing since 1981.”

So Seelig said he was skeptical when he received a letter last spring with St. Ignatius’ return address.

“I thought, ‘Oh yeah, I can’t wait to see what this is,’” he said with a laugh.

But surprisingly, the letter was an invitation to sing in the church. Seelig said he emailed the church staff asking, essentially, if they’d missed that bit of news from 1981. But the invitation was very real.

Father Greg Bonfiglio, a pastor at St. Ignatius, explained that the church sent invitations to a range of diverse choruses and choirs, inviting them to perform.

“I think in a world that’s just hyperpolarized right now, to build any kind of bridge with any group is a good thing,” he said. “I think people wouldn’t necessarily see the Catholic Church and the LGBT community as being allies — it’s not a natural alliance, I guess — so here’s a possibility for building a bridge.”

But Bonfiglio has been at the church for only six years and wasn’t aware of its sour history with the chorus.

“I didn’t know what happened back in 1981 when we did this, so there’s not a lot of virtue there, I suppose,” he said with a laugh.

But once representatives from the chorus and church began making real plans, both sides came to an agreement. The chorus would perform its 40th anniversary concert at St. Ignatius. The men, joined by soprano Ellie Dehn and a chamber orchestra, would sing “When We No Longer Touch,” the first requiem dedicated to people who died of AIDS.

“This concert offers us an opportunity to repair the relationship after all these years,” Bonfiglio said. “That’s what the Christian community is all about.”

There’s just one little glitch. Nobody has run it by San Francisco Archbishop Salvatore Cordileone, according to Bonfiglio.

Chorus tickets To buy tickets to the San Francisco Gay Men’s Chorus St. Ignatius concert and to learn more about other events scheduled for its 40th anniversary, visit www.sfgmc.org.

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“Oh, sure, he’ll hear about it,” the pastor said. “There’s nothing at issue, I don’t think.”

Here’s hoping.

I attended a rehearsal of the Gay Men’s Chorus on Monday night at the Academy of Art University on Post Street. Of the hundreds of chorus members there, just one has belonged to the group since its 1978 founding.

Robert Rufo, a retired city gardener and Bernal Heights resident, still remembers seeing a sign on a lamppost at Castro and Market streets that read: “Gay Chorus Forming.” The baritone recalls the group’s first concert at Everett Middle School, singing Christmas carols just weeks after Supervisor Harvey Milk was assassinated.

Rufo, who was raised Catholic but no longer practices, said he also remembers the plans for the St. Ignatius concert. And those plans falling apart.

“The archbishop got wind of it, and that was the end of that,” he said with a shrug. “Frankly, I wasn’t surprised. When I heard of the concert, I said, ‘Hmmm, what’s wrong with this picture?’”

Rufo said the chorus has sung at Most Holy Redeemer Catholic Church in the Castro, which is known for being super-inclusive, but it hasn’t performed in another Catholic church and certainly not at St. Ignatius.

“Never at St. Ignatius! Uh-uh,” he said, adding that when he heard the concert was back on 37 years later, he had the same reaction he did the first time around. “If it happens, great.”

Jim Bohannon, who joined the chorus in the summer of 1979, said the cancellation “felt like a sense of betrayal to a lot of us.” It sparked protests at St. Ignatius, and the news helped the chorus quickly sell out replacement concerts at smaller venues.

“Any kind of public slight to the gay community was taken very seriously,” he recalled, adding he was “flabbergasted” when the church invited the chorus to sing there this time around.

While the chorus is mostly thrilled to perform its 40th anniversary concert at St. Ignatius, there’s also a tinge of sadness. That 1981 hubbub over the cancellation came just before a mysterious illness began felling members of the chorus, one by one.

The chorus has four singing sections: first tenor, second tenor, baritone and bass. But it has long maintained a “fifth section,” a list of all the members who have died, the vast majority from AIDS. Tom Burtch, who joined the chorus in 1985, is the group’s official historian and said the fifth section now totals 389 members, and he estimates 375 died of the disease.

“Now it’s a treat when somebody dies of old age,” he said.

And so it’s fitting the group will sing an AIDS requiem at its 40th anniversary concert. Randy Laroche, who joined the chorus in 1981 two months before the St. Ignatius concert was due to happen, said there will certainly be mixed emotions as they sing.

“I think it’s going to feel euphoric,” he said. “And a little sad because of all the brothers we’ve lost who didn’t live to see this day.”

Mark your calendars: Two events coming up, both featuring scary themes. Halloween and the midterm elections.

At 10 a.m. on Oct. 27, Chronicle pop culture critic Peter Hartlaub and I will host a #TotalSF Halloween party for kids and their parents at The Chronicle, 901 Mission St. We want to see the best handcrafted costumes of any theme, and there will be a $250 prize for the most San Francisco one. Plus, get tickets to the Children’s Creativity Museum and professional photographs of your tykes. There’s even talk of Hartlaub appearing as a giant It’s-It. For more information and to register, go to www.sfchronicle.com/costume.

(Note to fans of #TotalMuni2018: My 5-year-old’s costume, the 82X-Levi Plaza Express inbound to Sansome and Filbert streets, is looking great, thanks to my crafty husband.)

Then it’s on to a more serious subject: the Nov. 6 elections. What’s on the ballot? Who will win? What does it all mean? Join us at 6:30 p.m. Oct. 30 at the Grand Theater, 2665 Mission St., for “On the Midterms: the Propositions, the Battles, the Blue Wave?”

Chronicle columnist Phil Matier, senior political writer Joe Garofoli and I will discuss the most important races and take your questions. Chronicle Editor in Chief Audrey Cooper will moderate. For more information and to buy tickets, visit www.sfchronicle.com/midtermevent.

Hope to see you soon!

San Francisco Chronicle columnist Heather Knight appears Sundays and Tuesdays. Email: hknight@sfchronicle.com, Twitter: @hknightsf