When you Google ‘Worker’s Vodka,’ the first thing that comes up is their tagline:

For men who don’t pass the buck, call in sick, or leave early for a Pilates class.

I first heard about the company when I was listening to 107.7 The End, my favorite radio station for music in Seattle. An ad aired, and it went something like this:

‘Worker’s Vodka is vodka for the working man. Ladies, I guess you can buy it too…just make sure to pick up a claw hammer and a pair of tube socks on the way home.

It irked me in a way that was subtle and grating enough that, the second time I heard it, I called the radio station. I sent an email to their ad department. They responded admirably and quickly, assuring me that 107.7 The End would not air the ad again. Definitely give them a listen if you have the chance; they rock.

Then, I started researching Worker’s Vodka and the company that makes it, Fremont Mischief Distillery. To my surprise, it’s a local company. And even more shocking…they donate part of the proceeds of that vodka to firefighters.

Now, my goal is absolutely not to destroy their ability to market their product. (It’s going towards a good cause!) What I want to do, however, is to make it abundantly clear that they have to change their advertising tactics. This kind of shit isn’t going to fly in the PNW.

I’ll start with my take on this campaign for men. (If you haven’t fled this blog by now, then kudos.) This series of advertisements are essentially giving you an itemized list of things you have to do to be a *real* man. Honestly, you have enough of those already! Even my hyper-masculine friends who love beer pong and would (generally) identify with the campaign are guilty of many of Worker’s Vodka’s ‘don’ts,’ which include wearing Hawaiian shirts on Fridays and saying ‘my bad.’ The box that this puts men in is suffocating. Being a man and being a vulnerable, dynamic, and emotional human being are seemingly incompatible.

Ladies, you know where this puts you. You can’t own tools or fix your own stuff. You can’t really do anything for yourself. Most importantly, you’re not a real worker. Let the men do their thing.

It would be frighteningly easy to, every time I see a Worker’s Vodka ad, contact the venue with which they advertise to let them know their consumers are unhappy. I can mobilize a couple people. The small local venues where Worker’s Vodka will be well-received will also be extremely conscious of keeping their customer base. They definitely don’t want to piss off all the hordes of Seattle liberals happily drinking Fremont Mischief. Everywhere from the local radio and TV stations to The Stranger and The Weekly will be receptive to customer feedback (and, especially, outrage).

However, I’d much rather go straight to the source and let the company know directly. Change your ad tactics or suffer economic consequences. They have certainly pissed off Celiac sufferers before–there are a number of angry and well-written comments on their Facebook page. Their phone number is 206-632-0957, and you can look at their (fairly well-crafted) website here.

Do what you will with this information! And let me know what you think about their ad campaigns. Is it an overreaction? Am I a secret nazi? Let’s find out!