NEW YORK, NY –

On the heels of President Donald Trump’s decision to pull out of the Paris Accords on climate change, some local governments have decided they, too, can pull out of agreements. Namely, the enormous tax subsidies that have allowed the President to amass spectacular wealth on the backs of taxpayers across the nation.

Looking Forward To Getting That Money Back

New York Representative from the 83rd district, Brendan Opehr, was glad that the state is calling to get that money back from Trump Tower. “A lot of these real estate tax break deals are cut in back rooms by politicians who obtain contributions from the developers. Donald Trump has said so many times himself. I’m just glad that the state no longer feels tied down by these previous agreements, and can back out and send a bill for 163 million dollars to the Trump Organization. In fact, I’d be surprised if a lot of city and state governments didn’t start backing out of these agreements tomorrow. There is a lot of money to be collected.”

Bonanzas For Local Government

Indeed, there are an estimated 880 million dollars in real estate tax break agreements that local governments around the world can now pull out of, and demand full payment from the Trump Organization.

“Oh yeah, we want that money back, like right now,” said Franklin Marshall of the National Park Service Tax Division, which gave the Trump Organization 32 million dollars in tax breaks for the hotel in Washington DC that bears the Trump name. “Judging by the way Trump pulled out of climate change, he’s not one to honor a bargain, so we are unilaterally pulling out of the agreement immediately, and want all of that money back.”

Shutting Down Mar-A-Lago

Said Tom Fletcherson of Palm Beach, Florida: “we are sending a car over to Mar-A-Lago in the morning, and if it does not return with a check to repay the city all of the tax deferments by 11am, we are pulling the licenses for that place and shutting it down by noon. The city has made terrible deals with the Trump Organization, and I for one am very glad we can pull out of all of them ASAP.”

Just how the Trump Organization will come up with almost a billion dollars to repay all of the government entities that have handed them tax breaks over the past few decades is unclear. However, that does not seem to bother local officials.

“I always suspected Donald Trump was an unreliable business partner,” said Mr. Fletcherson. “His decision to pull out of the Paris Accords is the confirmation that we have all been waiting for. We can now pull out of these terrible tax subsidy agreements with the Trump Organization in good conscience, knowing that Donald Trump entered into them without any intention of ever seeing them thru.”

Free Money For Trump Organization Great For The US

While the Trump Organization declined to comment for this article, a White House press release stated that although the Paris Accords were a terrible deal for the American people, the 880 million dollars in tax breaks for the Trump Organization was good for the country. And the organization would sue any government for breach of contract that tried to pull out of any of the tax break agreements it has secured.

“Tax break agreements are not at all like global treaties,” said the press release. “International agreements are with foreigners. Tax break agreements are between Americans.”

“Plus, the President has already spent all of that money anyway. So, let’s just not go there, OK?”

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