Imagine that somewhere Ford Motor Corp has a building full of engineers, right now, who have built a flying car that can go 300 miles an hour, runs on water, and has a device that gently massages your groin while you fly it. And Ford doesn't care. Imagine they're just sitting on the future of transportation, while the bulk of the company figures out how to squeeze another decade out of gasoline powered cars. Then, one day, they give a tour to Toyota and GM and happily show them their flying prototype because, why not?



"It is also capable of mixing a perfect Mimosa."

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This happened.

Only, instead of a flying car, the device was a personal computer. The company that let the most world-changing invention since aviation get away wasn't IBM, or Intel, or Texas Instruments. Here's a hint: it's the people who probably made your photocopier at work.



We think we speak for millions of office drones when we say, "Fuck these guys in the neck".

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If you get an Apple fanboy and a Windows loyalist in the same room they'll eventually get into a heated debate about who really invented the PC, and who was really responsible for each little innovation that came along to make it the device that most of us would rather lose a testicle than live without. In reality, both of them stole the idea from the company you probably associate with infuriating paper jams, empty toner cartridges and photocopied dongs at the office Christmas party.

It all started with a machine they slapped together almost 40 years ago, called the Xerox Alto.



Portrait-style? What the fuck?

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It was the birth of what we know as the personal computer now: It had a screen, a keyboard, a mouse, and a graphical interface -- the very first time all four of these came together in the same machine. Honestly, if the thing had been capable of rendering full color boobs PC evolution could have just stopped right then. And this happened in freaking 1973. Almost a decade before the first Mac would hit store shelves.