Psychobabble Melody Maker Dave can't bear to watch old people snog and there are a few people he'd like to kick the shit out of.

On the couch Dave!



If you could wake up tomorrow, having gained one ability or quality what would it be?

"Learning to fly. I would love to be able to get in a plane and take it from one point to another by myself. I used to have a fear of flying.I thought the only way to remedy it was to get a flight simulator- not like a fully mobile space shuttle simulator, just something on my computer - and start playing around with it. it was fun because you can actually learn from it. I always felt uncomfortable with the idea there was a stranger in charge of your life. Most pilots are crazy. They'll do anything... 'Thunder storm? I'll fly through it, fuck it, what the hell, I'm bored."



Do you prefer being around men or woman?

"I get nervous around women, so maybe not women. Then again I think I would rather hang out with a woman than a man. Does that make sense? I would rather hang with our drummer Taylor, my best friend Jimmy and our producer Adam Kasper than anyone else."



If you could use a voodoo doll to hurt anyone you choose, would you? And who would you use it on?

"I'm not a malicious person so I can't imagine doing that to anyone. Not even to make someones knee hurt a lot? I dont think so. You'd have to get me really pissed to make me resort to that."



When was the last time you were in a fight?

"A long time ago.Who caused it? Me. Who won? Me. It was probably 1990 when we were touring Germany. This drunk guy stole T-shirts from our stand and we kicked him out. As we were leaving he was banging on the windows of the van and I just had a fucking total loss of control. I just beat the shit out of his face. Have I been in a fight since? No. There are a lot of people I'd like to beat the shit out of, but I'd get sued."



Have you ever had to defend the honour of your partner?

"People would try to incite brawls by saying rude things in front of my wife - that pisses me off more than anything. America is the land of liability. I could sue you tomorrow for offending me. I could. It would never reach court, but that's the idea.In America nothing will win, nothing usually makes its way to court. One party will settle to keep from the legal bills that will pile up if it goes to court... It's an awful situation."



Can you urinate in front of other people?

"Yes. But I can't watch old people making out. That's gross"



Your house containing everything you own catches fire. After saving loved ones and pets, you have time to save one item. What would it be?

"Probably this letter I got from Kurt in 1992. That sounds terribly melodramatic, but it's true. I lose everything: passports, wallets, car keys, credit cards, but that letter is absolutely irreplaceable. He wrote it to me when everything was going nuts. We were all living in different places- he was in Los Angeles, I was in Virginia and Krist was in Seattle- and some decisions were being made without me. I got really bummed out and Kurt sent me this letter about my role and stature in the band. It was all, 'I love you like a brother.' It was just before we did 'In Utero' and it said, 'I can't wait to get back in the studio and make a record so we can whittle ourselves back down to a comfortable level,' Which of course never really happend."



Are you a good judge of character?

"It's easy to judge someone by how ready they are to impress you. That always tends to throw me a little bit, so I tend to gravitate towards people who don't really give a shit."



For a million pounds, would you go three months without washing, brushing your teeth or using deodorant?

"Three months? Nah, I've got enough goddamn money!"



What has been your biggest failure in life?

"My marriage. That ended. I don't think it was meant to be, but it was such a shame. I was 25, my wife was even younger. We were such close friends and loved each other very much. We weren't ready to get married. I miss her a ton, she's the funniest goddamn weirdo you ever met in your life. Absolutely adorable. It would have been better had we not got married. But you live and you learn."



What is your most compulsive habit?

"Gee I don't know. Burping onstage? That's a good thing! Burping onstage usually generates more applause than our fucking music. And, evidently it's a sign your singing from the right place- from your stomach and not your throat."