A good sword swing should at least hold the possibility of ending in a calamitous pratfall. If you’re going to wave a chunk of metal around, no matter how finely wrought, rune-etched and gem-encrusted it might be, then I expect your momentum to spin you in a full circle and land you in a heap whenever you fail to make contact with whoever you might be aiming your blade at. Swordy, from New Zealand’s Frogshark, caters to my desires. A local multiplayer sword ’em up for up to four players, it’s top-down battles appear to be physics-driven dances of death, during which players spin to slice and scurry to stab. It’s a colourful game as well, reminding me of Magicka but with flails instead of flames.



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I guess there are flames as well as flails.

Inevitably, writing about an upcoming local multiplayer game makes me a bit grumpy because I’ve been sitting, staring at Gang Beasts in my Steam library all weekend while attempting to summon three willing participants to play with. I’m considering sculpting some human-sized gelatin chums – I’ll even pop hats on them for customisation purposes – and bringing them to life using a combination of wot I’ve learned from reading Lovecraft and a half bottle of electrified Jif.

Grumpiness aside, Swordy looks splendid. There’s no confirmed release date but hopefully by the time it does come out, I’ll have hooked my computer up to my TV. Finally. Gang Beasts every night. How hard can it be?