Groucho: Now, Columbus sailed from Spain to India, looking for a shortcut. Chico: Oh, you mean strawberry shortcut? – Monkey Business

Columbus sailed his ships, the Niñteñdo, the Piña Colada, and the Santa Fe to the new world and then bravely tried to repel the landing Pilgrims. Or so I seem to remember.

Christopher Columbus was one of the first that they came for. Columbus was easy pickings, really.

Columbus lived and died five hundred years ago, nearly as long as it seems the Democrats have been trying to get Trump out of office. Columbus was an Italian before Italy was a nation, so getting support for Columbus isn’t all that easy. Besides, Columbus was an Italian working for the Spanish, which I imagine involved enough hand gestures to make eye protection necessary as far away as France.

But Columbus was the first hero that they came for because he represented something that the Left hates: Western Civilization.

In reading through several columns on why Columbus is bad, none of them focused on things that Columbus did, with the exception that he was too harsh to Spanish colonists, and some of the worst allegations were probably written by his mortal enemy, Agent Smith. No, most of the things that the writers blame on Columbus were based on events that were a result of the clash between Western Culture and the culture that previously existed in the Americas.

None of the articles noted that the people living in the Americas at the time were far more barbaric than anything brought to them by Europe – the Aztecs and Mayans and other tribes enslaved, murdered, and exploited each other on a scale that almost puts Sesame Street® to shame. The only real crime Columbus was guilty of was showing Europe how to get to a continent that was so technologically backward and immunologically compromised that it could be captured by half a dozen guys with swords and horses. It was like a flock of kittens in a room full of metal-bladed box fans, except the kittens had a better chance.

I want to resurrect the Aztec religion and start sacrificing vegans. That’s not a typo.

The war against Columbus isn’t about Columbus – it’s about a hatred for Western Civilization as a whole. The war is a desire to erase culture. Each time it occurs, it follows a similar path:

Choose someone who is a cultural hero, preferably a primary face of the development of Western Culture. The person should be, ideally, revered. I mean, not as revered as me, but revered.

Pick the worst things that they ever did, even if their life was otherwise a paragon of virtue. Note that it’s okay if what they did was socially acceptable back in the time and place it was done – the worst thing they ever did should be the only thing used to characterize the person. Jefferson founded a University, wrote the Declaration of Independence, and was President? You know he got caught double parking his buggy once?

thing used to characterize the person. Jefferson founded a University, wrote the Declaration of Independence, and was President? You know he got caught double parking his buggy once? Never let up. Even if it comes out that (like in the case of Columbus) nearly every bad thing said about the guy was written by his mortal enemy, ignore it. Keep vilifying him, and blame him for every single consequence of everything he ever did, even if it happened after he died. It’s like blaming George Washington for Mount St. Helens because it erupted in the state of Washington.

One particular consequence of Columbus making his journey is that the United States exists. Yeah, he never made it to any part of what makes up the United States today, but he showed the Europeans who finally got around to colonizing what eventually became the United States the way to get here. Western Culture came, and expressed itself in a unique way: American Culture.

If George Washington were alive today, he would probably spend most of his time scratching at his coffin lid.

In the case of the United States today, one common claim by Leftists is that there is “no American Culture.” I’m certain that fish don’t know that they’re swimming in water, either. But that is certainly a lie. American Culture doesn’t seem like it exists because it is all around us in the United States, and happens to be one of our biggest exports while also being our biggest draw.

Overall, American Culture has been responsible for creating more technology and prosperity than most cultures that have ever existed. Has it done stupid things, things with negative consequences for millions of people around the world like set loose Adam Sandler or Bruce Springsteen? Certainly. But on balance, the world has been made much, much better by Western Civilization and the United States.

But the Left cannot abide by nations like the United States or, especially, Western Civilization. Both of these stand in the way of the Left – they are structures that impede the ability of the Left to control every aspect of your life, to create a logic and history that only agrees with what the Left says. It’s because they exist, they want to destroy them. Very directly they want to destroy your culture. They hold your values as obstructions. They want to disintegrate your family so your loyalty belongs to the Left. And they want to see you dead so that your ideas will die with you.

Stalin: There is no “I” in team, but there is “U” in gulag.

All of that starts with values and culture. To attack that, not only do they attack the culture of today though the infiltration of Leftist ideas (How To Spot Propaganda In 2020, Featuring Stonks) but also through the vilification of the past. What has been attacked?

Statues – of Columbus, of Civil War leaders, of Lewis and Clark. They will not be done until every traditional American Hero is gone.

The National Anthem – Bouncy© (that’s her name, right?) and Jay C™ were at the Superbowl® on Sunday. They sat during the National Anthem to protest the unfair nation that provided Jay C© with his meager billion dollar fortune. Heck, you can’t even raise a private navy with that pittance.

Borders – Chants of “No Border, No Wall, No USA at All” are fairly subtle. I just wish I could figure out what they meant.

There are steps in the cultural erosion that we’ve seen so far, and the biggest attack has been against the Idyllic Decade, the 1950’s. The 1950’s were the last decade before everything went wrong.

Followed by the Jell-O® salad course, naturally.

It’s been attempted by the media, by movies, to re-write the 1950’s, just as the attempt to tear down Columbus started. Why attack the 1950’s? Because it was the high point in the life of the American family. Things were good:

Postwar prosperity led to nearly universal employment.

The wages of a single man were enough to support a family and raise children.

Less than three percent of children were born to single mothers.

Violent crime was less than half of today’s crime rate.

The salary gap between a high school graduate and a college graduate has tripled since 1965.

Boy Scout participation is half of 1950’s – and that was before the BSA folded to political correctness and saw a free-fall in membership.

Kiwanis membership is half of 1950’s numbers.

Church attendance in the 1950’s was nearly 90%. Now? Less than 40%.

Thank heavens Netflix® subscription numbers are up, since today 41% of children are born to unmarried mothers. Or there might be a correlation here . . . .

But what can you expect when reality is inverted in just the same way that the legacy of Columbus, skilled navigator, was inverted?

Family is now seen as bad. Rather than being a supporting structure that helps a child learn right from wrong via loving parental support and instruction television and movies would have you believe that family is a stifling, controlling, patriarchy that just doesn’t want you to be the individual snowflake you were meant to be. I mean, that’s what you’d think if you got your information by watching television or movies.

The best part? No limit on cats!

And churches? They’re evil. They’ve gone from places where you meet and discuss and learn about God to places where you learn nothing but intolerance from sweaty red-faced pastors and priests who don’t really believe in God. Oh, and these intolerant pastors and priests are all secretly sexually twisted, since anyone who believes in God and values must be, deep down, a deviant.

They pick the best features of the Leftists to showcase. They pick the best features of the civilizations that Leftists created, and then claim that it really work next time, while sweeping the bodies under the rug. They then pick the worst of their opponents and often stereotype them using their own worst tendencies. They want you to feel guilt for the things your ancestors did, when living by the standards of the day, while feeling no guilt themselves for the direct pain caused by their actions and ideas in the world today.

But, despite hardship, Columbus had a dream. He sailed west.

Statue or not – he was a hero.

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