Phil Kessel scored in the first period against the Boston Bruins on Wednesday night.

This did not sit well with one 6-year-old Bruins fan.

Meet Alex, whose horrific animalistic cries of agony* open this video, in which he declares that the Bruins “ARE GONNA LOSE” because “KESSEL SCORED” and “EVERY TIME HE SCORES. THEY. WIN!”

He’s talking about the Toronto Maple Leafs. But hey, it’s the Leafs … it’s not like Boston hasn’t rallied against the Leafs.

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Really?

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Oh. Well, turns out he was right and the Leafs blew the doors off the Bruins.

Alex probably isn’t old enough to remember when Phil Kessel, like, never scored against his old team, to the point where it was a reliable media narrative. Imagine the only world you knew was one in which Phil Kessel owned the Bruins and that Kessel trade was seen as lopsided toward the Leafs because Tyler Seguin is now winning the Richard Trophy in Dallas.

Insert “Twilight Zone” theme here…

So in the words of so many Bruins fans: Thank you, Kessel. Thank you for ruining a child’s night with your wicked shot, and ruining his living room rug with his tears. We can only hope that the “Parents Of The Year” award they receive from YouTube obscures attention from it.

(* That may or may not be completely staged, of course. But if it was, this kid’s like a 6-year-old Daniel Day Lewis.)

s/t Jose Rodriguez