During the familiar drive to the Jets-Patriots showdown in Foxborough, Mass., on Thursday, I contemplated various ways out of a moral quandary: how to continue to cover these weekly N.F.L. spectacles, knowing that in 15 to 20 years some of the participants will probably be disabled, or worse.

The simple answer is that football is a powerful lure, a fascinating social institution that speaks volumes about the American psyche.

The more complex answer is that football is in my blood. I played the game from sixth grade through college. I knew early on that football was violent, and I have close friends who suffer from chronic ailments because of their participation. On the other hand, the game has its own code of ethics: you accept the risks, and scholarships and contracts are hazard pay.

Two weeks ago, the N.F.L. agreed to a $765 million settlement with more than 4,500 plaintiffs who had sued the league, contending their health problems were the result of their years in professional football. By settling, the former players and their families won immediate financial assistance for pressing and sometimes costly medical problems. However, they lost a golden opportunity to learn more about what might have caused them.