(Picture: Ella Byworth for Metro.co.uk)

Sexuality is fluid. As with lots of things, it can evolve and boomerang over time.

Though so often thought about in binary terms, just as with gender, there are many different sexualities people identify as.

Autosexuality is one such identification that is seldom talked about. It’s the idea of being sexually attracted to yourself, and can also come with being autoromantic – experiencing the relationship with yourself as romantic.

It can mean being turned on by your own look and nudity, getting butterflies when you think about yourself, being excited to spend time alone, and masturbating to the idea of yourself. It’s all the feelings we get for a potential new suitor but for ourselves.




Ghia Vitale is autosexual and autoromantic. She is also engaged to get married to herself after proposing in March 2017.

After becoming aware of her sexuality at the age of seven, she didn’t explore her feelings until she was in college.

Now, after unlearning her preconceived notions about relationships and the idea that you have to be with another person for it to be valid, Ghia wants to normalise autosexuality.

She spoke to Metro.co.uk to explain how she discovered her orientation and what it entails.

(Picture: Ella Byworth for Metro.co.uk)

‘My definition of autosexuality is being attracted to yourself. I’ve been attracted to myself for as long as I’ve been cognisant of attraction.

‘My earliest memories of checking myself out in the mirror and feeling attraction happened at around age seven. I didn’t learn the term “autosexual” until after I graduated from college in 2013.

‘My attraction to myself made me confused at times, but once I learned about autosexuality, I was glad there was a word for my experience.

‘I’ve recognised myself as being in a relationship with myself since I was in college. I just didn’t have the vocabulary to express my experiences.

‘Before that, I still had sexual and romantic feelings about myself, but always assumed a relationship had to be with another person in order to be valid. I now realise that my relationship with myself is as valid as any other relationship.’

Though sologamy – marriage to oneself – is not widely practised, it’s not a new idea. Growing numbers of people are saying I do to themselves, though it is not currently legal anywhere in the world.

One Japanese company even offers self-marriage packages for single women and those unhappy with previous marriages.

Though Ghia has been engaged to herself for some time, she is yet to say I do. But she does have a ring.

‘Although I will one day be my own wife, I am enjoying the feeling of being engaged.

‘This is the first time I’ve ever been engaged to anyone. I’m glad it’s with myself. I try to be a good lover unto myself.

‘The relationship I have with myself is special. I sometimes get butterflies in my stomach when I think of myself. I know I can always turn to myself if I’m having a problem. I love myself for my uniqueness, creativity, and beauty.’

Ghia sometimes masturbates to herself if she likes the way she looks (Picture: Ella Byworth for Metro.co.uk)

Ghia has written about her experiences of being autosexual and wants more people to explore their relationships with themselves.



‘I want other autosexuals to know that it’s okay to be attracted to yourself,’ she added.

‘Other people aren’t attracted to themselves like we are to ourselves, but that doesn’t mean our desires are wrong.

‘Don’t be afraid to explore that attraction towards yourself.’

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