Here’s an unsurprising fact about the Virginia shooter: James Hodgkinson has a history of domestic violence. The man who shot at least five Republicans during a baseball practice early this morning was arrested in 2006 for punching a woman, assaulting his foster daughter and discharging a firearm.

I say unsurprising because the link between domestic violence and mass shootings is well established. The San Bernardino gunman shot his ex-wife while she was teaching at an elementary school, the Fort Lauderdale shooter was accused of strangling his girlfriend, the Orlando shooter beat up his ex-wife and a Kansas man opened fire on his workplace after his ex-girlfriend obtained a restraining order.

Then there are the mass shootings we don’t hear about because they happen in people’s homes rather than in public. Almost 60% of the mass shootings between 2009 and 2015 involved a spouse, former spouse or other family members and 16% of shooters had previous domestic violence charges, according to gun control group Everytown for Gun Safety.

It’s clear that people – mostly men – who control their partners with abuse are more likely to be violent outside their homes. But while curbing domestic violence could help prevent public mass shootings, the crime is too misunderstood by politicians and the public for change to happen.

Despite the fact that three women in the Unites States are killed every day by their partners, it’s shocking how little most people actually know about domestic violence. The stereotype of offenders involves men with a snarl who punch their steering wheels during traffic jams. In reality, abusers don’t always look or act aggressively. They are often the type of guys who shower their partners with affection in public to distract from their private abuse.

For example, the San Bernardino shooter’s Facebook page was filled with honeymoon photos and loving posts about the wife he then murdered. Abusive men can be the gregarious, hard-partying colleagues whose drinking problems turn ugly once they get home. In fact police officers, the very people who are supposed to protect victims, are two to four times more likely to commit intimate partner violence than the general population.

Most people also aren’t trained to spot the many signs of domestic violence. It’s common to think abusive relationships involve non-stop violence and that any victim would have bruises and black eyes. But most situations include verbal abuse and infrequent violence, which means red flags can be subtle. A friend’s relationship might move too quickly, her partner might be overly jealous or she might become more withdrawn.

This same public misunderstanding of these crimes exists on a policy level. The legal system has historically treated domestic violence as a personal matter rather than a crime – for example it wasn’t until 1993 that all 50 states made it illegal to commit marital rape. Police regularly dismiss cases of intimate partner violence, especially those involving sexual assault, and conviction rates for offenders are low.

Though cops knew the Fort Lauderdale gunman had been accused of strangling his girlfriend, they didn’t take the abuse seriously. Anyone charged with domestic violence is only banned from buying guns if they are still married to, live with or have children with their victim, despite the fact that women are more likely to be killed by men after they leave a relationship.

Politicians do little to raise awareness about domestic violence. When mass shootings happen, presidents and senators do not point out that before a gunman became a public terrorist he terrorized a partner or his family.

We have a long way to go: the current president himself has been accused of sexually assaulting numerous women and corporations regular try to discredit female employees who come forward with allegations of abuse.

There’s ample proof that many shooters begin their abuse in private. We need to create policies and support networks to help curb domestic violence so that fewer victims lose their lives. But those solutions will only happen once more of us understand what domestic violence really looks like.