At a time when football is still reeling from abuse scandals that sickened the game, it is right and commendable that there should be a greater concentration on the welfare of youth players in the academy systems and heightened sensitivity about the bullying of vulnerable teenagers trying to make it in English football.

It is right and commendable, too, that parents should be especially watchful about their children when they are away from home and struggling with the pressures of trying to earn a professional contract in a tough, unforgiving environment where there is intense competition for places at clubs that offer a shot at fame and great wealth.

But if you think that Craig Bellamy turning the sound down on the television when God Save the Queen was playing before England's World Cup semi-final with Croatia fits into the category of things we need to worry about, you are doing a disservice to people who are battling serious issues in the sport and to children who are being systematically bullied.

Craig Bellamy shouldn't be forced to walk away for turning down England national anthem

Bellamy upset a lad in the Cardiff City set-up because he said he didn't like Bristol City as well, apparently. Look, no one's pretending Bellamy is going to be a candidate for the Diplomatic Service any time soon but have we really got to a point where saying that is deemed worthy of serious complaint and forcing a coach to walk away from his job?

I am wary of the 'it was only banter' defence because that is often a facile response that can be used to cover up a multitude of sins but if the lad in question was upset by Bellamy's stance, it would presumably have come as a shock to him to know that the rivalry between the fans of Cardiff and Bristol City sometimes oversteps the bounds of gentlemanly respect.

There is a wider issue here, which is that the rewards of becoming a professional footballer are so great and the ambitions of parents for their children are so heightened that, when a kid is simply not good enough to make it as a professional, there has to be someone else to blame. In this case, the someone else is Bellamy.

The crisis that has enveloped him, the threat to a promising coaching career that has barely started, has struck a chord with other coaches around the country in the last seven days. Another youth coach at a Championship club told me he has grown weary of the work because the players in his charge and their parents, are so sensitive to criticism that he feels it is harder and harder to improve them.

England players singing God Save the Queen before World Cup semi-final against Croatia

Another coach spoke of being the subject of an official complaint from a parent because he had shouted at an Under-18 player who had jumped out of a tackle. Another mentioned an official complaint from the parent of a kid at a younger age group on the basis that his boy was not being played in centre midfield — in a six-a-side team. Coaches are in a position of power and there are some who abuse that power. But there is a flip-side, too. When they release a player at youth level because they are not good enough, they are vulnerable to the parents of those players complaining that they have been victimised.

I don't believe Bellamy, who has stepped down as Cardiff's U18s head coach while claims against him are being investigated, is a bully. I also accept that I'm biased because I know him, I ghosted his autobiography and I consider him a friend of mine. There's a danger that means I only see one side of the conflagration that is engulfing Cardiff City.

I'm not about to defend bullying. I hate bullying and I hate bullies. It's a curse in many walks of life and there is no doubt that it has blighted the lives of many who seek to pursue sport as a career. It can ruin lives. In the most tragic cases, it can end lives.

A young player felt intimidated after Bellamy made clear his contempt for Bristol City

Cardiff and Bristol City's rivalry sometimes does overstep the bounds of gentlemanly respect

I know that it exists in football, too. It is an evil that we are beginning to treat more seriously at last. Nor am I about to beatify Bellamy. He did a lot of stupid things as a player. He was rash and he was hot-headed. He could be aggressive and rude. And he could be violent.

His notorious golf club attack on John Arne Riise when the two men were Liverpool players under Rafa Benitez was revisited when Riise's book was published last month and it made Bellamy look ugly and thuggish.

But I also believe that Bellamy the coach is totally different to Bellamy the player. His attitude towards the game had begun to change before his playing career ended. He became a consummate professional, dedicated to training and fanatical about his fitness. He demanded his team-mates show the same dedication and will to win as he did.

He was a hot-head during his playing career but Bellamy the coach is different to the player

That is what he has taken with him into coaching. Since his retirement as a player, he has quickly built a reputation as a fine coach. He came close to beating Ryan Giggs to the Wales job after producing a presentation that impressed the Welsh FA. A few months ago, he told me that, when he took over as the U18s boss at Cardiff City, he made it clear to his charges that he intended to set new standards for excellence in his team. He gathered the boys around and told them he was going to ask a lot of them in training, more than had been asked of them before.

He told them that some of them would find the requirement to give their all in training day after day hard to cope with. He asked them to try to stick with it because they would reap the rewards if they did. But he was honest, too. He said some of them would fall by the wayside. Football is a brutal industry like that. Not many kids make it.

So is Bellamy rigorous as a coach? Yes. Is he demanding? Yes. Is he uncompromising? Yes. Does he sometimes have to tell boys and their parents that, sadly, in his opinion, they are not going to be good enough to earn a professional contract at Cardiff City? Yes. Does any of that make him a bully? I don't believe so.

Bellamy is under investigation at Cardiff after a young player accused him of 'bullying'

I know from speaking to him in the past how seriously he takes the welfare of his players. He has not forgotten the hardships he suffered when he was an apprentice. He is aware of how tough and how lonely it can be trying to make it. But he can be a hard taskmaster, too. The two things should not be mutually exclusive.

When Bellamy was a kid in the youth system at Norwich City, he was so homesick that he used to call his parents from a telephone box near his digs and stay in there weeping when the call had ended. Football is a hard business. It is a meritocracy. It does not make allowances for sentiment.

So where do we draw the line? Is talking harshly to a teenage boy bullying? Is telling him that he is not working hard enough bullying? Is telling him that he needs to improve bullying? Is telling him that he is not good enough bullying? If so, then Bellamy is guilty. If not, then maybe we should let a good, conscientious, dedicated coach get on with his job.

He demands a lot of his players and is uncompromising, but that doesn't make him a bully

When the list of prices charged by clubs for kids to be mascots was published last week, the least surprising finding of a survey that illustrated the greed of Premier League clubs was that West Ham were right near the top with a tariff of £700.

If ever a hierarchy of a club summed up the old saying about people who know the price of everything and the value of nothing, it is the wrecking crew in charge at the arena we are now obliged to call the London Stadium.

One day, maybe, they will work out that they need to give something back to their supporters if they are to be regarded with anything other than derision.