I can't imagine that the derivation of the thought "I think I'm going to create a blog" typically comes from someone that has something worth saying. I am no different. I have nothing particularly outstanding to say. I have been told that I am a good storyteller and that I should write a book about my life, but I feel as though those are compliments for people who are slightly charismatic but otherwise wholly unattractive. So, here I am, writing a blog to no one, but feeling the need to write. To who? Myself, I guess. I have no intention of actually promoting this or even making it public. My initial Blogger Experience was trying to figure out how to sanitize every piece of information about my identity that I could. I do not think I was successful.

I am sitting in a hotel room, two hours away from my home, because I live on the road for work and couldn't be fucked to wake up at 5AM to deliver a presentation to a bunch of rednecks about how their drug tes…