The F Word is a series celebrating what it means to be fat, from destigmatizing the word to taking stock of the discrimination fat people face. In this op-ed, Ashleigh Shackelford explains why fat isn't a bad word, and why they are reclaiming it.

Fat. Many of us who are fat have different feelings about this word. For some, it’s merely a description of the size of our body. For others, it has become a weapon against us, used to incite shame and worthlessness. We hear, “Ugh, I ate so much! I feel so fat right now,” and “How can you be happy being fat? There’s no way you’re healthy.” When people say the word fat, sometimes they mean ugliness, failure, laziness, dirtiness, gluttony, lack of intelligence, and worthlessness. But that's not what fat means.

No matter how people use it, fat is not a bad word. Fat is not an indication of value, health, beauty, or performance. Fat is a descriptor in the same way that black and queer are descriptors. And fat is somewhat similar to black and queer in more than just that way; it's also a word that encompasses a marginalized identity. Yes, fat is a neutral and descriptive word, but when it's an identity, it's much more than that. To reclaim this word, or any word, is to lean into an identity as a form of revolution against fat phobia, racism, and so much more. For me, fat is a way of saying “f*ck you.”

“I reclaim the word fat in all spaces, formal and informal, because I get to,” says Brienne Colston, director of Brown Girl Recovery. “I get to shift what was once used as a mechanism to break my spirit into something that offers a source of power and pride. It’s a reminder of all that I’ve come from, and all that I will do.”

How fat is weaponized, and the reclamation of the word, goes beyond size. Fat stigma is also tied to anti-blackness, in that being black is the abundance that white supremacy seeks to shrink. Blackness and its cultural markers are historically viewed through a lens of gluttony, abundance, and savagery, stereotypes that linger and impact us today. Because of this, black fat people are assumed to have it “easier” being fat, because it’s “normal” for our bodies to be bigger; because failing the societal standards white people set is the default for our black existence.

But black people come in all shapes and sizes, just like anyone else. It's the negative stereotypes created by white supremacy that reinforce the idea that we are naturally fat, and with that many of the negative associations tied to the word today. The more we call ourselves fat, and the more we realize that it's not bad to be fat, the more we're tearing down walls built by racism.

In a world that seems to want to reaffirm that fat bodies are not worthy of love and joy, and that being fat means we are failures and should be ashamed of “choosing this lifestyle,” we can fight this by taking up space — I encourage you to do this, because demanding space is demanding to exist.

It’s not just physical space, but digital space too. Often I can’t post a picture of my black fat body or identify publicly as fat, regardless of my happiness, health, or motivation, without harassment. But I stand firm in that fatness does not have to be fixed, eradicated, shrunk, hidden, silenced, or shamed.

Being fat is okay. I am okay. And I’m the only one who can define that.

Through a strong community of other fat people, and the process of realizing that fat is not a bad word but a powerful one, I now see fat as not only my personal power, but one that can change the world for everybody. The reclamation of a word that sourced so much shame fueled the reclamation of my entire being; it fueled my commitment to community wellness and my passion to build liberation.

Certainly fat people are not a monolith, and we do not all feel the same way about reclaiming fat. But to embody freeing ourselves from systems of shame that depict fatness as inherently nonhuman or as a failure is something many of us commit to, consciously and not.

My definition of fat is Black AF, multidimensional, and futuristic. Fat means I exist. Fat means taking up space and demanding more. Fat means black. Fat means fuck you. Fat means human. Fat means creating a world full of possibility without shame. Fat means saying f*ck you.