Years spent as a loving, caring and careful mother and I had almost forgotten that I don’t break easily, I can take roughness and actually really enjoy it. I’d played it safe for so long that I had lost that daring side of me, the kinkiness, the darkness. Don’t get me wrong, I love the new sides of me I discovered, the positivity, stability and confidence but it felt like something had gone forever. Or so I had thought.

Walking there I could hardly breathe, I wish I could have blamed that on the tight steel boned corset I was wearing but I knew that wasn’t it – it was the excitement and anticipation that were taking my breath away. I was shaking, too.

The moment arrives, I close the door behind us, I fall silent and wait for the first order to come. I feel out of place to begin with, silly even, yet still shaking with excitement, my body all tense. Then I get reprimanded for not following an order right, I’m crawling around, a spank ensues.

Thoughts running through my head, I want to speak, I want to say things, funny things, inappropriate things, mundane things just to make me feel at ease. But I don’t.

Then something happens.

A switch has gone off in my head. It’s not me anymore, not the usual me anyway. I’m a sub, I’m his sub, no more crazy racing thoughts, all I need to worry about is making sure I follow the next order the best I can. I want him, I want him to do things to me, I want him to use me. The breathing gets shallow, I feel dizzy at some point.

Things get serious, clothes are coming off, ropes neatly laying on my bed. I kneel in a corner facing the wall, quietly, awaiting orders while Sir slowly gets things ready. The wait is exciting and relaxing at the same time, I’m sinking deeper into my sub self, I just want to please, show how good I can be despite my lack of experience.

My arms are now tightly tied behind my back, ropes digging into my elbows and wrists. I love the feeling. I’m bent over the bed and the spanks start coming hard and fast, I can take them easily at first then the pain gets sharper on the now sensitive skin, I start gasping at every hit.

It’s becoming all a blur, I’m inebriated, excited, on a high from everything that is being done to me.

My pussy hasn’t even been touched yet I’m so wet I feel a drop of my own juices landing on my toes, I’m not sure whether he noticed, I want to tell him but resist the urge.

Sir is fucking my face, I don’t even think about whether I like it or not, I just want to do my best, I focus on what I do, I try to stop my gag reflex, my spit dribbling between my tits down my belly and reaching my pussy. I so want to be fucked right now, to feel him inside me, pounding me hard with no mercy, I know it’s close, I’m starting to want to just take control and get on top of him to ride him but invisible ties keep me down, I can’t disobey, I won’t, not because of fear of what punishment that would get me but because I’d be letting him down. A good sub doesn’t do that.

The tension eases off as Sir ties my hands above my head and to the bed, then my thighs to my calves. I can’t move around much, I’m exposed, he could do anything (or even worse, nothing) to me. He knows how much I want it, I’m getting impatient, I know he wants me too, I’ve known through it all how good this is for him as well but he makes me wait. My legs are restless, rocking from side to side, I try to focus to keep them open as per orders. He takes one last picture of me for my husband and I know this is likely to be hubby’s favourite out of the set.

At last his cock is inside me, almost giving me a sense of relief after all the teasing and longing. He’s fucking me hard and fast, my movements severely restricted but I barely pay attention to the ropes, it feels so amazingly good. It’s just pure pleasure.

The games are over, I untie my legs and admire the rope marks on my body. I’m myself again.

I’m left buzzing for the rest of the day, turned on, confused, a new part of me has been unleashed and it just wants to play now, I need more of this.