College football is back, as of Aug. 26. Unless you want Power 5 vs. Power 5 games, in which case it's Aug. 31. Or unless you only acknowledge Saturdays, which would make it Sept. 2. And there are a bunch of other upcoming days with college football on them, all scattered throughout there.

Either way, one of the weirdest opening schedules in all of sports is upon us. The early bonus week is back, with more than a half-dozen middlin' games on, but things really start to get rolling on Thursday the 26th. Week 1 doesn't officially end until Labor Day, three days before Week 2 begins. It's a lot!

Below, every FBS game scheduled to be televised (or, in spots where nothing else is going on at the time, a few FCS-only games), sorted according to a subjective assessment of watchability. TV times and streaming info are included for each.

Hope you like college football, because here comes a heckload of it.

Saturday, Aug. 26 college football schedule

Time (p.m. ET) WATCH THIS Maybe watch It's football Noon FAMU vs. Texas Southern

ESPNU, WatchESPN 2:30 Oregon State at CSU

CBSSN, CBSSports.com 3 Portland State at BYU

ESPN, WatchESPN 6 Hawaii at UMass

NESN 6:30 Chattanooga vs. Jax State

ESPN, WatchESPN 7 Colgate at Cal Poly

ESPNU, WatchESPN 7:30 USF at San Jose State

CBSSN, CBSSports.com 10 Stanford vs. Rice

ESPN, WatchESPN

Let's start off nice and easy. Nothing on this day is essential, but you'll feel lame if you aren't standing and saluting during the kickoff of the season's first Division I and the season's first FBS vs. FBS game.

USF-SJSU is a weird road test for Charlie Strong's Bulls, expected by many to be the country's best mid-major, and Stanford-Rice in Australia gets to go up against Mayweather-McGregor. At least CFB's bizarre mismatch is free to watch!

Sunday, Aug. 27 college football schedule

Time (p.m. ET) WATCH THIS Maybe watch It's football



Richmond-Sam Houston State was going to be this evening, but it's been postponed because of Hurricane Harvey.

Thursday, Aug. 31 college football schedule

Time (p.m. ET) WATCH THIS Maybe watch It's football 6 FIU at UCF

CBSSN, CBSSports.com 6:30 Presbyterian at Wake Forest

ACC Network, WatchESPN 7 Buffalo at Minnesota

BTN, BTN2Go Austin Peay at Cincinnati

WatchESPN Rhode Island at CMU

WatchESPN Tenn. State at Georgia State

WatchESPN Elon at Toledo

WatchESPN 7:30 Tulsa at Oklahoma State

FS1, Fox Sports Go Holy Cross at UConn

WatchESPN 8 Ohio State at Indiana

ESPN, WatchESPN FAMU at Arkansas

SEC Network, WatchESPN 9 Sac. State at Idaho

WatchESPN ULM at Memphis

CBSSN, CBSSports.com 10:30 NMSU at Arizona State

Pac-12 Networks

For most people, this will count as Opening Night.

College GameDay is setting up shop at Indiana for the season's first Power 5 conference game, with Kevin Wilson as Ohio State's OC against his old team. OSU's favored big, but this should have some atmosphere to it.

If you need a pregame snack, P.J. Fleck becoming a meme on Minnesota's sideline or Tulsa-Oklahoma State possibly reaching 70 points by halftime should do it.

Friday, Sept. 1 college football schedule

Time (p.m. ET) WATCH THIS Maybe watch It's football 6 Fordham at Army

CBSSN, CBSSports.com 6:30 Charlotte at EMU

WatchESPN 7 Cent. Conn. at Syracuse

ACC Network, WatchESPN 8 Colorado vs. Colorado State

Pac-12 Networks Navy at FAU

ESPNU, WatchESPN Washington at Rutgers

FS1, Fox Sports Go 9 Utah State at Wisconsin

ESPN, WatchESPN 9:30 Boston College at NIU

CBSSN, CBSSports.com

The reigning Pac-12 South champs vs. another team that might be the country's best mid-major, and it's a state rivalry game? I think you should watch that.

Elsewhere, wildly different head coaches clash when large, golden boy Lane Kiffin welcomes the eternally overachieving Ken Niumatalolo, and I don't expect Rutgers to give UW much of a fight, but that's a Playoff team you can watch on a Friday.

Saturday, Sept. 2 college football schedule

Time (p.m. ET) WATCH THIS Maybe watch It's football Noon Wyoming at Iowa

BTN, BTN2Go Missouri State at Missouri

SEC Network, WatchESPN Maryland at Texas

FS1, Fox Sports Go Ball State at Illinois

BTN, BTN2Go Bowling Green at Michigan State

ESPNU, WatchESPN Akron at Penn State

ABC, WatchESPN Kent State at Clemson

ESPN, WatchESPN 12:20 Cal at North Carolina

ACC Network, WatchESPN 12:30 Bethune-Cookman at Miami

ACC Network, WatchESPN 1 YSU at Pitt

ACC Network, WatchESPN 2 Portland State at Oregon State

Pac-12 Networks VMI at Air Force

WatchESPN 3 NC State vs. South Carolina

ESPN, WatchESPN 3:30 Florida vs. Michigan

ABC, WatchESPN Temple at Notre Dame

NBC, NBCSports.com UTEP at Oklahoma

Fox, Fox Sports Go Nevada at Northwestern

BTN, BTN2Go William & Mary at Virginia

ACC Network, WatchESPN 3:45 Troy at Boise State

ESPNU, WatchESPN 4 Kentucky at Southern Miss

CBSSN, CBSSports.com Stony Brook at USF

WatchESPN EWU at Texas Tech

FSN, Fox Sports Go Charleston S. at Mississippi State

SEC Network, WatchESPN 5:15 WMU at USC

Pac-12 Networks 6 JMU at ECU

WatchESPN NC Central at Duke

ACC Network, WatchESPN Albany at Old Dominion

WatchESPN 6:15 Appalachian State at Georgia

ESPN, WatchESPN 7 Liberty at Baylor

FS2, Fox Sports Go Hampton at Ohio

WatchESPN SE Louisiana at UL-Lafayette

WatchESPN Houston Baptist at Texas State

WatchESPN SE Missouri State at Kansas

JTV Stephen F. Austin at SMU

WatchESPN UMass at Coastal Carolina

WatchESPN 7:10 Central Ark. at Kansas State

K-statehd.tv 7:30 Georgia Southern at Auburn

SEC Network, WatchESPN South Alabama at Ole Miss

ESPNU, WatchESPN Louisville vs. Purdue

Fox, Fox Sports Go 8 Alabama vs. Florida State

ABC, WatchESPN Arkansas State at Nebraska

BTN, BTN2Go Jackson State at TCU

Fox, Fox Sports Go Vanderbilt at MTSU

CBSSN, CBSSports.com Northern Iowa at Iowa State

Cyclones.tv Grambling at Tulane

WatchESPN 8:15 Southern Utah at Oregon

Pac-12 Networks 9:30 BYU vs. LSU

ESPN, WatchESPN 10:30 Mont. St. at Washington State

FS1, Fox Sports Go 11 NAU at Arizona

Pac-12 Networks

OH HELL YEAH WE'RE BACK

Things start slow, as is custom, and Cal-UNC should be on your radar just because it's gonna go way wrong.

Florida-Michigan in JerryWorld is the season's first actual big game. It might not have postseason ramifications, but it'll teach us a lot about each team's offense.

After that, the biggest opening game in the history of the sport arrives. Six things to know about the tactics in Bama-FSU, and why the Noles have a shot.

BYU-LSU in Houston should be a great closeout game, just thumping everyone off to bed.

Sunday, Sept. 3 college football schedule

Time (p.m. ET) WATCH THIS Maybe watch It's football 1:30 SC State at Southern

ESPN2, WatchESPN 6:30 Virginia Tech vs. West Virginia

ABC, WatchESPN Texas A&M at UCLA

Fox, Fox Sports Go

The rule of the schedule grid: only one WATCH THIS game at a time. I'm picking the Black Diamond Trophy rivalry over A&M-UCLA. For one thing, it's a rivalry. For another, it should have a much hotter crowd than the L.A. game, with rowdy VT and WVU fanbases both nearby. (And for another, VT and WVU are ranked, unlike A&M or UCLA.)

Labor Day college football schedule

Time (p.m. ET) WATCH THIS Maybe watch It's football 8 Georgia Tech vs. Tennessee

ESPN, WatchESPN

Like Bama-FSU, this is at Atlanta's new origami bomb of a stadium. It'll be full, loud, and contentious, with GT striving to hit a 4-0 streak against the SEC East and UT trying to keep Butch Jones from getting fired. What fun!