So. This is how our little trek through "Tiny Woods" went:

Walk a few paces.

Pause as the Voices in my head argue over which way to go. Lean on Abby for comfort.

Observe that Abby herself does not appear completely comfortable, particularly when I am leaning on her. Reassure Abby that at least she's not me.

Get approached by a random stranger or six. Like, say, a bird, a caterpillar, a thoroughly creepy sentient bug-eyed seed, or some group of telepathic eggs that are crying to kill us all.

Abby attempts to introduce us both to the random stranger(s), with the inevitably futile hope that we can be civil.

The stranger(s) promptly laugh at my name.

The Voices cry foul and order me to beat the stranger(s) up, which, incidentally, I'm not very good at.

Abby wrecks the strangers while I hide behind that stupid Marowak skull, which gives me a headache. The jerk Pokemon who attacked and/or insulted us runs away crying while I try to pretend I'm not there. The voices VICTORY RIOT, which also gives me a headache.

And then we walk a few paces again.

I'd certainly had far more pleasant experiences in my life. It's a pity I couldn't remember them.

"Is this what living feels like?" I asked Abby.

She shrugs. "You get used to it. It beats the alternative."

I found that strangely hard to believe at the time.

We kept finding money lying around out in the open. Just a few coins, pocket change really. Much to my surprise, Abby was carrying a rucksack, so we were able to hold on to any goods we found.

Although, and I'm sorry to say this but in fairness to Abby I feel that I must, I once nearly set the rucksack on fire trying to put out Abby's tail, which I kept forgetting was supposed to be burning. And it wasn't long before she slapped me right in the face for it.

With her tail. Seriously, she slapped me with the end of her own burning tail. Which, for once in what I could remember of my life, made me actually glad I had that lousy skull clamped over my head. Although the skull did make it harder for me to wipe the soot out of my eyes.

"Will you stop trying to kill me?!" she hissed in my face.

"I wasn't trying to-!" I insisted. (Because I wasn't, of course.)

"Then stop stomping on my tail!"

All things considered, it was an awkward journey.

. . .

We finally did find that poor Caterpie, Normie, stuck in a crevasse.

"Don't you know better than to go near places like that?" I found myself saying quite sternly, almost parentally. "You could have been killed!"

Normie sniffled. "I-I-I... I d-didn't! Th-the ground j-j-just opened up under me!"

"Just like last time," Abby pointed out. "And the time before, and the time before that... Normie, this is not a safe place to play! How did you even get past all those Pidgey, I'd like to know?"

"I-I-I-I'm s-s-s-sorry..."

"Someone really ought to do something about all those ruffians rushing about," I muttered offhandedly as I helped Abby wield a long branch for Normie to cling to.

"I'd say," Abby agreed, sighing.

She didn't look me in the eye when she said it. I barely noticed that, because after that unfortunate journey, I didn't really want to look at her either.

What else can I say? We rescued the kid and brought him back to his mother, who of course showered us with lavish gratitude and a few berries. I wasn't sure I wanted the gratitude, but I accepted the berries (being insulted is hungry work).

Honestly, I just wanted to wash my paws of the whole thing after that one. Nice knowing you, Abby, I'll be seeing you, good luck with keeping your tail on fire. Just go home, take a nice bath and a long, long nap…

Except that I had no memory to speak of. As such, I had no idea whatsoever where "home" was.

Abby said she knew a place where I could stay. I found this questionable, pointing out that some stranger with voices in "her" head who was wearing bones (and nothing else) would probably have a hard time getting a landlord's approval, but Abby insisted that it was all right.

The house had been vacant for two years, ever since the previous tenant had been declared "absent without leave," but apparently it was a house Abby had had built for Pokemon suffering from a similar condition to mine – i.e. amnesia slash strange voices in one's head.

"You mean I'm not the first Pokemon this has happened to?" I wasn't sure whether this was more comforting or disturbing.

"Well… yes and no. The other Pokemon…" Abby paused, and I caught a brief flash in her eyes as if she was considering whether or not to tell me something deeply, deeply disturbing.

I asked the obvious question. "So the previous tenant just left, or disappeared?"

Abby cleared her throat, unintentionally sending small sparks flying at my skull-covered face. "The Pokemon there have… left under unknown circumstances. Some say that the Voices led them back to the Outside. Some say that they turned back into humans-"

"Back into humans? BACK into humans?!"

"It's late. You're tired. You've been routinely attacked by a bunch of jerks. Cuboner, if we don't get you home and let you rest somewhere, you're going to go off the deep end."

"You mean I haven't already?"

That was probably the best news I'd heard all day, even though the Voices in my head kept saying things that apparently indicated otherwise.

Abby nodded. "Actually, you did pretty good for a first-day Host. But you need to sleep. Otherwise, you're just going to keep hurting yourself."

"If that's good, I'd hate to see bad." I paused. "Um, Host?"

She sighed. "I'll explain in the morning. Look, if you're worried about the house, it's not haunted, and I can stay with you the first night in case you're worried about those Exeggcute goons coming back. No sweat."

I actually smiled. "I think that would be—"

GUYS WE NEED TO SEX ABBY

"—you know what, I think I'll take a rain check on that one."

To be continued…