Songs that reference football teams and players

Last week Raphael Chaskalson opened up a real can of worms when he got us talking punk bands referencing football teams, players and much, more more. The Knowledge inbox has, as ever, been brimming with emails, allowing us to come back for a much broader round two. Jumping straight in at the deep end is Thomas Biltcliffe, who offers up ‘Revenge’ by south London’s finest, Dave. “Ricardo Quaresma, I got a load of flair / Still go to war over a rack like Tony Blair,” it goes. “And if your head of office isn’t on my other line with Di María’s wages.” From rap to Roger Trew, who reminds us of ‘Frankly, Mr Shankly’ by the Smiths. Adam Manning goes over old ground with Billy Bragg’s 1991 hit ‘Sexuality’ but then shoves us in the direction of 2004’s Kaiser Chiefs, whose front-man Ricky Wilson hails from Leeds, and are named after a South African football club. “I think it was where Lucas Radebe was signed from,” he says. Indeed, ex-Leeds captain Radebe signed from Johannesburg-based club Kaizer Chiefs. Wilson is supposedly partly to thank for another gem here, too. “One reference which no doubt confused a lot of listeners is Amanda Palmer’s ‘Leeds United’, written after her break up with Ricky Wilson of the Kaiser Chiefs it seems the club may have been one of the things that came between them,” so-says Jamie O’Hare. “An example of the confusion ... the line ‘Your expert double exes’ prompted one commenter on songmeanings.com to wonder whether the song was about Tresor Kandol (who wore the shirt number 20).” Let’s hope so, anyway.

More? “How could you forget Saint Etienne, who only went and named themselves after a club?” asks HM Toh. “When I was a kid St-Étienne did really well in Europe, got to the European Cup final played in Glasgow [in 1976; they lost 1-0 to Bayern Munich], and they just looked very dashing – very impressive green and white kit and the name was just very exotic,” said singer Bob Stanley last summer. The Proclaimers, so-says Stephen Hodgson, sang about both Killie and Hibernian in ‘The Joyful Kilmarnock Blues’.

Back closer to home, Chris Sawle has his hand up with another answer. “Obscure but very beautiful Texan ambient drone outfit Stars of the Lid recorded a tune called ‘Dopamine Clouds over Craven Cottage’ on their 2007 album, And Their Refinement of the Decline, as a knowing reference to the fact that one of the band is called Brian McBride (no, not that one),” he explains. Then there’s Rod Stewart, more famous for that wayward fifth-round Scottish Cup draw than ‘You’re In My Heart’ these days. But, as Chris Dunbar (and Mark Charters) tells us, “the song references Celtic and (probably Manchester) United. Although because he claims Scottishness, he could mean Dundee United (who had been in the 1974 Scottish Cup Final against Celtic). Or Ayr United.”

Rod Stewart, earlier. Photograph: Steve Welsh/PA

Honourable mentions to Sam Bailey (and many others) for the Fall’s ‘Sparta FC’ and Jonathan Walford, who offers up the Family Cat’s 1992 thumper ‘Steamroller’, that repeatedly mentions, “and the Saints are playing at home today, to great effect”. Hats off to Gareth Wilson for digging out and dusting off Sammy King’s 1975 tearjerker, ‘And so, where do you go from here?’: “In the song our hero checks his football pools to find that, Chelsea won, and let him down. And so did Hartlepool.” Before we go, Terrence Lockyer steams in with not one, but two thoughts. Amy Macdonald’s ‘The Green and Blue’ (2012) refers to the Old Firm derby, with Macdonald herself a Rangers fan. And some versions of Eric Idle’s Monty Python classic ‘Always Look on the Bright Side of Life’ includes a knockout closing line, “alright, so your team’s losing 15-nil at home to Barnet.” And last but not least, David Szmidt highlights ‘Ich, Roque’, by Sportfreunde Stiller, which features none other than Mr Roque Santa Cruz himself.

Wembley dreaming

“Chris Wood scored on his debut for Burnley on Sunday at Spurs’ temporary home of Wembley. Has anyone ever scored a debut goal at Wembley before?” asks Oliver Forrest.

A brief step back in time, towards the 90s and up crops Arsenal’s original Super Swede, long before Freddie Ljungberg. This one is almost cheating, as the goal came in the Makita Cup, the pre-season friendly tournament formerly of prestige, and it came at the former national stadium. Anyway, signed for £1.2m from Cremonese, an Italian outfit now in Serie B, Anders Limpar made himself an instant hero with Arsenal supporters after scoring on his debut, against Aston Villa at the old Wembley. Limpar rifles home from an acute angle, helping Arsenal on their way to a 2-0 win. A goal that will definitely stand in this contest is Sead Kolisanac’s effort against Chelsea at the start of August. Following his summer move from Schalke, the Bosnia-Herzegovina left-back did the business on his debut, popping up to score a late equaliser in the Community Shield, of which Arsenal eventually won on penalties after a bizarre set of Chelsea spot-kicks, following his summer move from Schalke. Of course, there are countless players that have scored on their international debut at Wembley, too; Iago Aspas for Spain in November 2016, Vincent Janssen for Holland in March 2016, Dele Alli for England in November 2015, and Harry Kane for England in March 2015.

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Ex-Arsenal winger Anders Limpar. Photograph: Felix Clay/The Guardian

A CV to rival the best of them

“As a Mansfield fan, I see that this season we have signed both Jacob Mellis and Kane Hemmings. Both of these have had Champions League experience with Chelsea and Rangers, respectively. Has any other League Two, or even Conference, squad had more Champions League experience than this?” asks Matt Knowd.

Steve Evans has built a team teeming with experience, if nothing else. Mellis, the former England under-16s captain, made his first-team debut in a Champions League win against MSK Zilina in November 2010. He left Stamford Bridge after he admitted setting off a smoke grenade at the club’s Cobham training ground. Hemmings, meanwhile, played for Rangers at Malmo in 2011, coming off the bench with his team down to 10 men.

The obvious present-day rival to Mansfield here is surely way down in the seventh-tier, Glenn Tamplin’s Billericay Town. The ambitious Essex outfit – who are targeting League Two within five years – boast Paul Konchesky, Jamie O’Hara and Jermaine Pennant among their ranks, the latter of whom featured in the 2007 Champions League final. O’Hara, most recently of Celebrity Big Brother fame, featured for Tottenham Hotspur in the Uefa Cup while Konchesky played in the Europa League for Liverpool and Fulham. Billericay thrashed Thurrock 5-0 on bank holiday Monday and sit top of the table.

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Knowledge archive

In an event that went largely unnoticed last weekend, an MMA fighter tried his hand at boxing in Las Vegas. With that in mind, here’s a question from back in 2005:

“I seem to recall former Carlisle United player Chris Balderstone going on to represent England at cricket,” says Gary Scott. “Are readers aware of any other football players who excelled at another sport?”

There are plenty of overlaps between football and cricket, the most obvious example being one Ian Botham, who managed 11 appearances (seven starts) as a non-contract player for Scunthorpe United between 1979 and 1984, a time when he was also hitting all-comers out of the ground for both Somerset and England. Then there’s Denis Compton, who not only represented Arsenal and England on the football field, but also spent 22 years with Middlesex CCC, amassing 78 Test caps in the process. Brother Leslie followed in the same vein with Middlesex (though not for his country), while also forging a career with the Gunners and winning two England football caps.

But these stars are just the tip of the iceberg, as Ian Spittle takes up. “‘Fatty’ Foulkes was a dual cricket/football international; in 1920, Jack Durston took a ‘five for’ playing for Middlesex in the morning, and kept a clean sheet for Brentford that afternoon. As the age of professionalism dawned, examples become rarer, and often involved journeymen rather than star players. Worcestershire skipper Phil Neale was probably the last true professional cricket and football player, although his football career was spent in the lower leagues with Lincoln. I believe Viv Richards may be the only man to represent his country in both soccer and cricket World Cup competitions, playing for Antigua in qualification.”

“Viv Richards was once dismissed by Coventry goalkeeper Steve Ogrizovic when Ogrizovic (of Shropshire) played for the Minor Counties against the touring Windies,” adds Trevor Harwood, before going on. “Arthur Milton (Arsenal/Gloucestershire) and Willie Watson (Sunderland/Yorkshire) both represented England at football and cricket in the 1950s. Team-mates of Milton at Gloucestershire that also played football included Harold Jarman (Bristol Rovers), Bobby Etheridge and David Smith. At Yorkshire, Watson was joined by Ken Taylor, who was a regular also for Huddersfield Town. I think Brian Close played a bit - maybe for Leeds United, and also for Arsenal.

“Jim Standen won an FA Cup winner’s medal for West Ham in 1964, and played in the Worcestershire team that won the County Championship in 1964 and 1965. Ted Hemmings was in the same Worcestershire squad as Standen, and also turned out at wing-half for Shrewsbury Town. The Hammers also had Eddie Presland, who played cricket for Essex. And Geoff Hurst, apparently a wicket-keeper, also played at least once for the Essex first XI. Around the same time, Ron Tindall was a regular in the Surrey team, and turned out for many football teams, including Chelsea and the Hammers. Noel Cantwell (West Ham, Man Utd) played football and cricket for Ireland, while Andy Goram (Oldham Athletic, Rangers, Hibernian) did the same for Scotland against the Aussies in 1989, before Rangers banned him from playing cricket in case of injury.”

On top of that there’s Graham Cross, who represented Leicester City during the winter and Leicestershire CCC during the summer during the 60s and 70s; and even Phil Neville. That’s right, the new Everton signing once captained England’s U15 cricket team and even represented Lancashire’s second string.

Moving away from cricket, Brian McKeever says: “Instantly, thoughts go to Manchester United and Ireland legend Kevin Moran, who in 1976 and 1977 won All Ireland medals for Dublin in Gaelic Football.” Then there’s Olympic relay gold medallist Darren Campbell, who once spent a season with Welsh outfit Cwmbran Town, as well as getting himself on Plymouth and Weymouth’s books.

From Europe, Hans van Schijndel notes: “In Holland, Johan Neeskens was a member of the Dutch youth baseball team and was voted best batsman at the European Youth Baseball Championships in Rome in the sixties.” And Juha Ovaskainen adds: “Norwegian international Simen Adgestein had to give up his career as footballer due to an injury, but had a nice backup plan as he became (and still is) a Grandmaster in chess as well.”

But it’s back to Ian Spittle for the man that trumps the lot: “CB Fry played in the 1902 FA Cup final for Southampton, and for England v Ireland in 1901, as well as playing 26 cricket Tests for England, holding a long jump record that stood for 21 years, and famously being offered the throne of Albania.”

Can you help?

“Denny Johnstone has signed for St Johnstone on loan. Are there any other instances where a player has the same name, at least in part, with the club they are attached to?” asks Dan White. “Arsène Wenger not included please.”

“My team, Grimsby Town, have now had a player sent off in each of their last five games. Are we close to holding the record for the number of consecutive games one team has had someone sent off in?” ponders Ash Bowe.

“John Stones came off the bench for Manchester City against Bournemouth in the 100th minute. Has there – ignoring extra time of course – ever been a later substitution?” asks Will Hughes.

“On 12 May 2013, Walter Pandiani played in the same team with his son, Nico. This was for Atlético Baleares in the Spanish second division B league. Are there any other examples of family members of different generations (not brothers or cousins) playing in the same team?” queries Alan B.

“Leyton Orient’s Charlie Lee got booked for the third time in our opening five games on Saturday – what’s the quickest anyone’s picked up a ban for accumulating five yellow cards?” asks Gareth Marshall.