BOARD members at Tottenham Hotspur are still arguing over who has to tell Tim Sherwood he’s fired.

After an entirely typical series of results for the club, Louis van Gaal has been brought in to manage the side but has pretended to be the new heating engineer whenever Sherwood is around.

Board member Roy Hobbs said: I subtly suggested Tim might want to spend more time in his garden but he just growled ‘do I look like a fucking gnome to you?’ and glared at me until I backed out of the room.

I think we might have to move stadium in the summer and lock him inside this one.