Subject: FOR NEWBIES - Guide to abreviations used on exmormon.org board

Author: Deconstructor - (updated Sep 2010)

Here's my list of abreviations and special vocabulary used on Recovery from Mormonism Board

AP - Assistants to the President, mission president's top missionaries/henchmen BIC - Born In the Covenant (parents had been sealed in the temple prior to your birth) BIL - Brother-in-Law BKP - Boyd K Packer BoA - Book of Abraham BoM - Book of Mormon BP - Branch President BTW - By The Way BY - Brigham Young BYU - Brigham Young University CHI - Church Handbook of Instruction CK - Celestial Kingdom, where God lives and all Mormon believers strive to reach COB - Church Office Building COJCOLDS - Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints COP - Corporation of the President CTR - Choose the Right, a mormon saying and common sybmol on rings worn by Mormons D&C - Doctrine and Covenants DH - Dear Husband DL - District Leader, responsible for 3 or 4 sets of missionaries EQ - Elder's Quorum ET - Ezra Taft Benson FAIR - Foundation for Apologetic Information & Research, apologetic organization FARMS - Foundation for Ancient Research and Mormon Studies, Church apologetic organization FIL - Father-in-Law FKAM - Formerly Known As Mormon FPR - Faith Promoting Rumor FS - Fast Sunday FTM - Fast and Testimony Meeting F&T - alternate for fast and testimony meeting G - Grin GA - General Authority GBH - Gordon B. Hinckley HC - High Council HP - High Priest HT - Home Teacher IMO - In My Opinion IMHO - In My Humble Opinion IMNSHO - In My Not So Humble Opinion ISPART - Institute for the Study and Preservation of Ancient Religious Texts, church apologetic organization JoD - Journal of Discources JS - Joseph Smith JW - Jehova's Witnesses LDS - Latter-Day-Saint LOL - Laugh Out Loud MIL - Mother-in-Law MINO Mormon In Name Only MMM - Mountain Meadows Massacre MP - Mission President MTC - Missionary Training Center NT and N/T - No Text message (only a subject) OMG - Oh My God PEC - Priesthood Executive Meeting PH - Priesthood PoP - Perl of Great Price PoGP - Pearl of Great Price PPI - Personal Priesthood Interview ROFL - Roll on the Floor Laughing ROFLMAO - Rolling on the Floor Laughing My Ass Off ROFLMAO/PIMP - Rolling On the Floor Laughing My Ass Off and Peeing In My Pants RM - returned missionary; prime marriage prospect for young LDS women RS - Relief Society RSP - Relief Society President SHC - Stake High Council SIL - Sister-in-Law SP - Stake President SWQ - Spencer W. Kimbal TBC - True believing Christian TBM - True Blue Mormon or True Believing Mormon TSCC - "The So-Called Church" VT - Visiting Teacher WTG - Way To Go YM - Young Mens YSA - Young Single Adult YW - Young Womens ZL - Zone Leader, responsible for several districts

Vocabulary:

Angel Chaps - garments

Apes - see AP above

Apologetic - someone who tries explaining the inconsistencies or other problems with the Church in a positive light

Backslider - someone trying to be active in the Church but cant seem to fall in line

Baker's Hat - stupid temple ceremony head gear

Big 15 - LDS president, two counsellors and 12 apostles

Branch - a small Mormon parish

Closet Doubter - Someone who dosen't believe the Church anymore, but still is active and pretends to be a believer

Correlation - Church program started in the 1960's to completely overhaul the church organization and centralize total control of the Church to the Apostles and First Presidency.

Courts of Love - diciplinary council where you get exed

Crutch - Mormon Church

Discussions - 6 canned lessons that all missionaries teach to "Investigators"

Eric - He owns this place and his word is law

Ex -excommunicate

Exed - excommunicated

Exmo - Ex-Mormon

Funeral potatoes - a typical dish at Mormon functions or deliverd as a charitable gesture when someone dies

Garmies - Garments

Golden Contact = someone the mishies definately think will agree to a baptism after the 6 discussions

Great-and-Spacious Building - The new $500mil church conference center in Salt Lake City

Happy Valley - Provo Utah, high concentration of Mormons and home of BYU

Herms - sister missionaries, comes from Spanish term "Hermanas"

Ivory Tower - Phalic-looking Church Office Buildiing in Salt Lake City

Investigator - someone taking the missionary discussions

Jesus Jammies - garments

Kolob - sun nearest to where God lives, according to Mormon scripture

Lurker - Someone who frequents reading the board but rarely if ever posts

Mainstreaming - the Mormon Church's changing it's own doctrine, practices and image to look more Christian

Mishies - Missionaries

McTemple - a Mormon Mini-Temple

Mormon Corridor - Arizona, Utah, Idaho high-density mormon states

Mormon Salute - gesture made by Mormons constantly pulling their underwear out of their butts

Morg - the Church acting like a Star Trek Borg Collective, "Mormon Borg"

Morgbot - a Mormon who demonstrates lack of independant thought, "Mormon Borg Robot"

Moron - a Mormon who demonstrates lack of independant thought

Nevermo - someone who has never been a member of the Church

Newbie - someone new to the board or new to the whole concet that the church is a hoax

Pay Lay Ale - a chant from the temple ceremony that was supposed to mean, "Oh God, hear the words of my mouth." It was deleted when the temple ceremony was modernized in the 1990s; a metaphore for all that's weird in the church and it's habit of changing what was supposed to be directly revealed and completely perfect in the first place.

Pod - a Mormon who follows leaders blindly

Polygamy - one man being married to more than one wife, also known as "Polygyny"

Polyandry - two men married to the same woman at the same time which was praticed by early church leaders

Profit - psudonym for "Prophet"

QuadCom - a 3" thick 4-in-1 edition of the LDS standard works that has become a popular replacement for a Bible and triple combination

Sacred Skivvies - garments

Smoking Gun - fact or evidence that indicates the Church is a fraud

Stake - a collection of Wards

Sticks - Scriptures

The Y - BYU, not YMCA

Troll - someone who posts a rude/ignorant message "trolling" for responses. See also the entry for Troll in the Jargon File.

Ward - standard Mormon parish

White Bible - strict rulebook given to all missionaries

For a comprehensive list of other Mormon vocabulary, see:

http://www.salamandersociety.com/dictionary/