Hello Little One,

I guess you’re not so little anymore, are you? Hard for me to imagine, as you sit here next to me, almost exactly half past your second birthday, sweetly cuddling me as we practice our shapes and colors. Almost unbearable to imagine, really. How can I ever let you go? How can I let you walk out of my house, walk into a new life, claim your independence (as you rightly should!), without shattering into a million tiny pieces on the floor?

Questions for another day, I suppose.

Right now, that moment seems far away. So far, in fact, that I can almost pretend it will never happen. I can kid myself into thinking you will be sitting next to me forever, sleeping in my bed forever, crawling in in the middle of the night like a naughty little elf, knowing I won’t send you back to your own bed. Because I can’t. Because deep down, I know these moments are fleeting. Small — tiny even — in the grand scheme of our lives. One day, these growing up years will seem like but a moment to to you, a tiny, twinkling dot on the map of your life.

And because your 18th birthday still seems, at this point, too far away to picture, because of that, I can still keep (hopefully) dry enough eyes to give you some parting advice that I hope you will hold dear while still seeing it for what it is: simply the result of 31 years of living on this earth, and the things those years have taught me.

SO, enough sappy stuff…here are the (very) few things your mama knows to be true.

Always Brush your teeth.

Never stop learning new things. It is impossible to know all of the things there are to know, therefore try to find it impossible to quench your thirst for knowing. Never stop learning new things. It is impossible to know all of the things there are to know, therefore try to find it impossible to quench your thirst for knowing.

Be empathetic. This one might be the hardest, and most important one. Learn to ask yourself questions like, “how would I feel if this were me? How difficult would it be if I had to face this challenge, make this decision, take this journey?” Never stop striving to put yourself in others’ shoes.

But at the same time, protect yourself. Believe in the value of you. You are precious; you are one of a kind. Keep your distance from anyone that makes you feel like you might not be any of these things.

It is ok to say no.

You don’t have to give a reason. You don’t have to give an excuse. You don’t have to explain yourself. Most of the time, explanations just sound like excuses nobody likes to hear excuses. By the same token, never make excuses to yourself.

Share.

Things mean nothing. Relationships mean everything. Give of your time, give of your things, but most of all, give of yourself. It doesn’t seem like it now, but real, deep, lasting connections are so hard to find. And they don’t exist in a bubble. Nurture the relationships in your life that mean something to you, and you will find yourself nurtured in return.

It’s good to be alone sometimes, but never so much that you find yourself lonely. Trust your mama on this one. I couldn’t bear for you to discover it yourself.

Read. Read, read, read, and then read some more. Books open up countless worlds that you may not have ever known otherwise.

Be kind. That’s it — just be kind. No stipulations, no exceptions. Be kind.

Remember that you always have a choice. Every choice has its own consequences, for sure, good or bad, but you can always choose. That’s why we always tell you not to say”I can’t.” Because you can. You are never stuck.

No one is thinking about you as much as you think they are. Trust me. Don’t torture yourself thinking that they are. Just be you. Be free.

Choose joy, above all. You can’t control what happens to you in life most of the time, but you can choose how you react to it.

in yours. You have absolutely no idea what another’s journey looks like, even those closest to you. Can you believe that even me, your mama, the woman who carried you for nine months in her body, who raised you, nourished you, loved you beyond all belief from the moment you were born, cannot ever even fully comprehend your individual journey? It is one of the greatest miracles of life. Recognize that just as your life — your particular experiences, your feelings, your path — is absolutely unique and special, so is everyone else’s. Can you even comprehend the magnitude of that, my love? You are an extra in someone else’s grand epic, just as they arein yours. You have absolutely no idea what another’s journey looks like, even those closest to you. Can you believe that even me, your mama, the woman who carried you for nine months in her body, who raised you, nourished you, loved you beyond all belief from the moment you were born, cannot ever even fully comprehend your individual journey? It is one of the greatest miracles of life.

If you don’t know what you want to do when you grow up, it’s ok. Just try to figure out what you want to do right now, in this moment. Not knowing is ok. Some of your greatest adventures in life will be the result of not knowing what you want.

But trust me on the tooth brushing.

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