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It's a made-in-Iran, "super advanced," radar "evading" military jet, prepared to unleash hell upon the regime's many enemies. "State-of-the-art technologies," Iran claimed! "Modern defense achievements," too! Only there's now one major problem: Aviation experts say this plane can't even fly.

Iran's defense minister unveiled the Qahar 313 to much fanfare on the anniversary of the 1979 Islamic revolution this weekend, including this majestic television spot broadcast on the state news agency:

So it's basically the Beyoncé of fighter jets — a glorious achievement combining beauty and skill, fierceness and modern domination. Except here's why the Qahar 313 is more inauguration lip-sync than Super Bowl halftime show:

The cockpit is too small.

And here's one more shot with a pilot:

That seat is tiny. As The Aviationist's David Cenciotti points out, the "cockpit seems to be too small, to such an extent a normal pilot doesn’t properly fit in the ejection seat. Have you ever seen a pilot with his knees above the side borders of the cockpit and his helmet well beyond the ejection seat’s head pad?" Granted, our knowledge of fighter-plane ejection primarily comes from scenes out of Top Gun, but Cenciotti's point makes sense. The only possible explanation for this could be if Iran was raising an army of smaller than average fighter-jet pilots, but that's as ridiculous as this plane actually working.