Brexit to make everyone poorer except lawyers, confirm lawyers

Lawyers have rejected claims that Brexit will make everyone poorer, saying it’s going tremendously well as far as they’re concerned.

Responding to the news that another legal challenge to the process has been punted up to the Supreme Court, top legal practice Simon, Williams & Williams LLC said they’ll be delighted to keep fighting the good fight for as long as the money keeps on coming.

A spokesman for the firm said it was vital that plaintiffs continue to explore every possible legal avenue to prevent or delay the Brexit process so that they feel their options have been fully explored by a Senior Partner billing at £550 an hour.

“All those so-called ‘experts’ and ‘economists’ saying that everyone will be poorer”, said senior partner S. Williams contemptuously. “What do they know?

“It’s been three years since the vote, and I’ve got a new villa on the Cap d’Antibes. The way things are going, I’ll have that new Aston Martin by the time Article 50 is finally activated.

“All that’s going to happen is we’ll see a rebalancing of the economy towards senior civil law advocates, as that’s clearly where the opportunities lie these days.”

Reports indicate other parts of the economy are also prospering in the wake of the Leave vote, with online satirists understood to be making so much money they’ll soon be able to afford a second pair of shoes.

I think, therefore I am (not a Brexit supporter) – get the t-shirt here!