Sometimes there’s nothing for it, is there? Now, what I like about this particular hex is that it isn’t fatal… To be honest, it’s not even all that harmful.

The purpose of this little enchantment is more to “bind and confound”. As such, it’s ideal targets are

School bullies

Workplace bullies

Meddlesome neighbours

Intractable bigots

Basically, anyone who has failed to see reason or live and let live. This is not your classic ‘revenge spell’. It’s goal is to foil someone’s harmful plans and get them to fuck off. Note that I do not technically have I problem with the murkier curses, I just haven’t had cause to ever use them. Hopefully my life stays that way.

Ingredients

A slip of paper on which you write the victim’s name. You can turn it into a sigil if that’s how you roll. Keep a hold of the pen. Powdered cayenne pepper. From the kitchen. As simple as that. A small freezer bag or some other disposable container.

The Method

Now, I’m playing pretty fast and loose with the ingredients here from a traditional Hoodoo perspective. I like to make up for it by adding a bit of orthodoxy to the method. So that means that my hex gets pretty churchy. You can omit whatever you like. To be honest, you can perform the rite in complete silence… But where’s the fun in that?

Gather your ingredients in the kitchen. I do this at night and light a few candles on the kitchen table because getting the feel right is half the battle in any spell cast. But you can leave it all out if you have to.

Knock three times on the floor and say “Peter, Rock of Christ, open the gate.” Knock three again and say “Peter, Rock of Christ, open the gate.”

Call upon the “Thirsty spirits, lost in Purgatory” to bear witness as you “bind and confound <name>.”

Read aloud Psalm 140. As you say lines 9, 10 and 11 draw a line through the person’s name. For clarity those lines are:

9As for the head of those that compass me about, let the mischief of their own lips cover them.

10Let burning coals fall upon them: let them be cast into the fire; into deep pits, that they rise not up again.

11Let not an evil speaker be established in the earth: evil shall hunt the violent man to overthrow him.

Put the slip of paper in the freezer bag or small container and fill with water from the tap.

Shake a whole bunch of cayenne pepper into the bag. Really go to town on it.

Seal the freezer bag/container and then shake that mother up like you’re making a cocktail. This is the homemade version of traditional Hoodoo “war water”. As you shake the freezer bag say “<name>, I bind and confound you!” over and over

Put the freezer bag in the freezer and forget about it.

Thank and dismiss the spirits. Ask St Peter to please close the gate.

Effective Spell Disposal

This looks simple but it’s a fairly potent hex. So when it has done its job you cannot just throw the frozen bag into the trash. No. Treat it like it’s biohazardous material. (I wear gloves when I pull it out of the freezer.)

Wrap it in newspaper or something and quickly dispose of it in a public trashcan in a park or somewhere. Once it has done its work, the less time it is in your possession, the better.