Workplace harassment is rife – and it is affecting men as well as women, according to a shocking new report by the Everyday Sexism Project. It's time to stop blaming the victims and start taking the issue seriously

"Was asked to join in threesome with boss and his deputy" … "Told to sit on my boss's lap if I wanted my Christmas bonus"… "Heard partners assessing female candidates according to their attractiveness"… "Told to get an abortion or resign as two pregnant workers was unfair" …

Workplace harassment is one of the most common issues reported to the Everyday Sexism Project – in fact, we have collected nearly 10,000 entries on this topic alone.

So it is no surprise today that a new study by law firm Slater & Gordon has revealed that one in six women have had colleagues look down their blouse, almost half have experienced comments about their breasts in the workplace and one in eight have left jobs because workplace harassment has made them feel so uncomfortable. The study suggests that sexual harassment in the workplace is rife among both men and women, with almost 40% of men also reporting experiences. But 60% of those surveyed say they have kept a possible harassment incident to themselves, making this an invisible, yet enormously common problem. Indeed, the experiences quoted throughout this article have all been reported to the Everyday Sexism Project in the past 18 months alone.

Workplace sexual harassment is one of the most difficult and insidious issues to tackle, because victims are so often in a position of vulnerability, afraid of damaging their careers or even losing their jobs altogether if they dare to rock the boat.

"When I was 23 my arse was regularly pinched at work. I was too afraid of losing my job to report it." "I work in a bar and face constant, ongoing, never ending abuse from men ordering drinks... I know if I complained I'd have to leave my job."

Perpetrators are often much older and more experienced than their victims, and in many cases are even in a position of responsibility over them, making it near-impossible for those being harassed to complain …

"Had a manager that said he would 'totally rape me.'"

"A guy at my work told me he'd get me fired if I didn't have sex with him. His brother was the boss."

What's worse is that even when victims do find the courage to come forward, they frequently report being dismissed, as the problem is belittled and normalised: "A male boss said he'd 'love to bend me over' and more, I reported it to female supervisor who said I was being 'sensitive.'"

"Saw my hours cut every time I complained to a manager about the co-worker who sexually harassed me and then threatened me."

Part of the problem is that the sort of issues reported in the Slater & Gordon study, including having your bottom pinched, are widely considered "just a bit of fun", making it hard for workers to feel able to speak out against them.

"When a customer at work tried to reach his hand down my shirt, I wasn't taken seriously by any of my co-workers"

Often, there is a sense that everybody is "in on the joke", so victims feel unable to speak up for fear of being branded humourless, or a troublemaker: "While I was bending over to pick up stock, male colleague grabbed my hips & simulated sex. Everyone else laughed."

The irony is that while such experiences are tolerated and brushed under the carpet due to normalisation and a culture of acceptance, in fact everybody is legally protected from sexual harassment in the UK workplace, including protection against the violation of a person's dignity, or the creation of an intimidating, hostile, degrading, humiliating or offensive environment. Almost every one of the thousands of incidents reported to us would fall under these categories, yet again and again victims say they feel unable to speak up for fear of not being taken seriously, or of losing their jobs.

Part of the reason for this, just as with so many other forms of harassment and assault, is victim blaming. When workplace harassment hits the headlines, people often react by asking why victims don't simply stand up for themselves – why didn't they make a fuss, or firmly put their harasser in his or her place? This attitude completely fails to take into account the power dynamics of many workplace harassment scenarios; the vulnerability of many victims and the fear of losing one's job, particularly at a time when employment is scarce and public attitudes towards victims are unsympathetic. Even if some people are able to stand up for themselves in such a scenario, the point is that nobody should have to – these are serious offences, protected against by law, and they should be treated as such.

The entries we are receiving day in, day out, clearly indicate that the problem has reached endemic proportions:

"There will be at least 3 shifts a week at work where I am spanked, grabbed, groped or stroked"

"As junior doctor, asked consultant for 2nd opinion on an x-ray. 'Only if you sit on my lap while we look at it'."

"A boss once cornered me in office after everyone left, told me wouldn't let me leave till I agreed to go out with him. I was 16."

It's time to start taking workplace harassment seriously, listening to victims, and, above all, placing blame firmly where it belongs: with the perpetrator.