I’m not going to lie to you. I have a bias. A bias toward creamy, full-flavored juices that don’t go overboard with sweetness. I have a bias toward SeduceJuice. I consider them to be one of the best “everyday” juice vendors. That is, not so exclusive as a Five Pawns, and not vying for the bargain shopper with Mt. Baker. Just high quality at a fair price. SeduceJuice is right up there with The Vapor Chef, and I sometimes think they don’t get the recognition they deserve.

Well, I’m here to kick ass and recognize SeduceJuice. And I’m all outta ass.

Snake Oil

This is the final boss of ADVs. The juice that made seduce a contender. Their cream base works so well here, it makes you wonder why other juices can’t be this good. It’s smooth and rich, with a gentle hint of coconut. The pear layered on top is perfection. If you told me a pear flavor would be in my top three all-time juices, I woulda told you you were crazy. But it’s simply fantastic.

Rating: Reorder, reorder, reorder

Snake Bite

If I’d never tasted Snake Oil, I might proclaim Snake Bite to be one of the best juices ever. For me it occupies a spot just slightly below Snake Oil, but I know some folks prefer Snake Bite, and I can understand that. There’s a bit more “snap” to it, with the same creaminess and balance. Lovely and perfect.

Rating: Reorder

Snake Venom

It’s a shame Snake Venom doesn’t get the attention it deserves, but its big brothers Snake Oil and Snake Bite are simply that great. If you find yourself tiring of those two, Snake Venom is a nice change-up.

Rating: Keep

Jezebel

Jezebel presents an indiscriminate blend of fruits. Which fruits? I have no idea. Fruit is fruit, right? But I like it. It’s fine. It’s just sort of fine…

Rating: Back of the Drawer

Cherub

For some reason, cherry seems a hard flavor to get right. This liquid does not appear to incorporate the trusty Seduce cream base, and it suffers for it. Bland and under-developed, with an intoxicating kiss of Robitussin. Back to the drawing board, fellas!

Rating: Trade

Genesis

When I got my first sampler of Genesis, I thought I’d found a new ADV. It knocked me out. Bright, refreshing, full-flavored. But I find Genesis wears on my palate after a while. I use it in a carto, which mutes some of the crispness that tends to overwhelm after extended vaping sessions.

Rating: Back of the Drawer

Impeachmint/Impearmint

I’ve been trying for two weeks to come up with something helpful and/or witty to say about these juices. I’ve still got nothin’. Fact is, they are what they say on the label: pear and peach with some mint. And they’re fine. They’re OK. If you like peach and/or pear with mint added, this may be for you. But they’re not impressive in any way.

Rating: Trade

Sanctuary

I’m a nut for pineapple, but I’ve yet to find a pineapple liquid I enjoy. When I learned SeduceJuice was making a pineapple flavor, I hoped it would be the answer. Paired with their signature cream base, it would be amazing. But for some reason, they added mint to the mix. I remain broken-hearted. It’s not unvapable, but I’m not sure who this is aimed toward. Menthol lovers will find it too mild, while fruit lovers will find it too mellow and minty.

Rating: Trade

Jango

Let’s not mince words. This is a reaction to the popular “Boba’s Bounty” and its many knock-offs. Seduce doesn’t shy away from the comparison, so I won’t either. I was hopeful SeduceJuice could blend something as good or better than AVE, but for my tastes, Jango is too sweet and too “tea-like.” It lacks the richness of Boba’s, and after a few tanks, I just couldn’t vape it any longer. There are better options.

Rating: Trade

Vanilla Custard

I find both vanilla and custard to be flavors that are difficult to represent well in e-juice. But if anyone can do it well, it’s SeduceJuice, right? Well…. not so much. Presenting undertones of plastic and musty cleaning product, this blend is devoid of the creamy richness I demand (no, really, sometimes I stand up in public and shout, “I demand creamy richness!”). Even after two weeks of aging, it’s awful. Huge miss here.

Rating: Throw at the Wall

Nebuchadnezzar

I’m not a menthol guy, so I may simply “not get it,” but I’m unsure where this flavor fits in. It’s fairly tame as far as a nice menthol punch in the mouth is concerned, and it has a barely noticeable hint of sweetness. Some liken it to Wrigley’s Spearmint gum. I liken it to toothpaste (and in fact, sometimes I vape this right after brushing my teeth, so as not to upset my delicate oral balance. Oral balance is important, friends.)

Rating: Trade

Numbers

It’s complicated. But it’s good. Aside from that, I’m not sure what to say about this juice. It’s perplexing, but satisfying. There’s definitely some banana in there (I’ll let you work in your own joke). Perhaps fig? This is more in line with what I was hoping for from Jango. You’ll just have to try for yourself. Take a leap of faith, but age it well.

Rating: Keep

Rapture

This flavor may not be for everyone, but apples and raisins? Yes, please. I’m reminded a bit of those instant oatmeal packets we were forced at gunpoint to eat as a child. What? You didn’t eat at gunpoint?

Rating: Reorder and age

Snake Eyes

As of this typing, Snake Eyes is still in R&D, and only available if you’re lucky enough to get one as a free sampler. I was lucky. This might be SeduceJuice’s best work yet. Not to say my favorite, but certainly the most impressive. I’m not a banana fan, but this really knocked my socks off, if nothing else, just for the fact the banana inhale and light cinnamon exhale are so well-defined. Now I have to find my socks. Maybe I’ll just buy new ones, because every time I vape Snake Eyes, they shoot off into the horizon.

Rating: Age, enjoy and order as soon as it’s available