Pain? Did one of the Trump supporters leave a piece of chalk behind and you slipped on it causing you to sprain your ankle? Do they not realize that this is chalk? You could erase the “T” in “VOTE TRUMP” and have it say, “VOTE RUMP.” They could get their own chalk and draw a circle around where they are saying and write “SAFE SPACE,” and this magical force field will protect them from all those scary chalk words.

Many students carried signs featuring slogans such as “Stop Trump” or “Stop Hate” and an antiphonal chant addressed to University administration, led by College sophomore Jonathan Peraza, resounded “You are not listening! Come speak to us, we are in pain!” throughout the Quad.

The scribes of these vile monsters was so extremely abhorrent that it prompted 40 students to gather at Emory’s Administration Building at around 4:30 p.m. to voice their concerns.

Sorry Brussels, no time to #JeSuisBruxelles. We’d love to mourn the 34 people slaughtered and 270 injured in the terror attacks by murderous jihadists with death-dealing suicide bombs, but we have our own frightening and nerve-racking crusade that we must fight, there are nefarious demons who are scribbling the name of a legitimate political candidate with a writing utensil used by a 4-year-old girl.

On Monday, students protested at the Emory Administration Building, but before you jump on their case, they had a valid reason for their passionate indignation – some person had the audacity to write “Trump 2016,” “Vote Trump,” and “Trump!!!” in erasable chalk around the campus the night before.

There is an article detailing the struggles of students at Emory University claiming that they were “in pain” and felt “unsafe” after they discovered pro Donald Trump graffiti written in chalk around campus. The publication that shared this story was The Emory Wheel , and I immediately thought that they must be one of those parody news sites that posts outlandish and fake articles like The Onion. To my stunned disbelief, The Emory Wheel is a real publication that is the student-run newspaper of Emory University that reports on real news regarding the institution of higher learning in Atlanta, Georgia.

“It is our duty to fight for our freedom,” shouted Peraza. “It is our duty to win. We must love each other and support each other. We have nothing to lose but our chains.”

Chains? Chains? Really? You are not being held against your will at your $60,000 a year college that you chose to be at and may leave at any time your feeble, little heart desires. You are not forced to vote for Donald Trump. In this fine Democracy you can vote for your candidate to help Trump not get elected. I’m sure actual slaves from the last 10,000 years would like to smack you upside your head with your figurative “chains” for undermining how truly awful an institution slavery is.

After about ten minutes of this nonsense, the protesters were actually ushered into the Administration Building because in 2016 everyone with feelings need to have everyone else hear how butthurt they are.

“I’m supposed to feel comfortable and safe [here],” one female student said of the chalkening. “But this man is being supported by students on our campus and our administration shows that they, by their silence, support it as well … I don’t deserve to feel afraid at my school.” I gotta get me some chalk, this shit sounds more powerful than an AK-47.

The chalk scribblings were done last night, relax.

What happens when these children turn on the television or visit a website covering the presidential election and there are photos and videos of Trump rallies with hundreds of “Trump 2016” signs? They must jump like a cat who just saw a cucumber, piddle their SpongeBob underoos, then run and hide under their bed weeping into their favorite Anna and Elsa Frozen blankie. I feel sorry for anyone who gets triggered by something that is so absolutely harmless.

The university’s administrators including University President James W. Wagner entertained these babies even more by inviting them into the Henry L. Bowden Board Room. Then Peraza pandered to his band of milquetoast, suckling toddlers by asking, “What are we feeling?” Responses of “frustration” and “fear” were yelled out by the toddlers. Surprisingly, the feeling of needing to be coddled in the bosom of a mommy was not one of the replies.

“How can you not [disavow Trump] when Trump’s platform and his values undermine Emory’s values that I believe are diversity and inclusivity when they are obviously not [something that Trump supports],” one student said tearfully. Another student openly ponders, “Banning Muslims? How is that something Emory supports?”

One student had the audacity to request that the Emory send out a university-wide email to “decry the support for this fascist, racist candidate,” but thankfully some semblance of logic returned to the building and Wagner replied, “No, we will not.”

One student made a compromise, but it was still insane. “The University doesn’t have to say they don’t support Trump, but just to acknowledge that there are students on this campus who feel this way about what’s happening … to acknowledge all of us here.”

Under this ridiculous proposal, it would mean that Emory University would have to send mass emails for every time someone had a feeling. “Dear Emory University students, we would like to make you aware that some students prefer Nutella to peanut butter. Please be sensitive towards their feelings when you are making your peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Thank you.”

Somehow, this ludicrous discussion about chalk writings morphed into demands by students for the university to improve diversity in the “higher positions,” including the Board of Trustees. A request that is unconstitutional as stated by Mizzou’s Vice Chancellor Of Diversity told Concerned Student 1950 when they made similar demands earlier this month.

“[Faculty] are supporting this rhetoric by not ending it,” a student said. “People of color are struggling academically because they are so focused on trying to have a safe community and focus on these issues [related to having safe spaces on campus].” From a “Trump 2016” chalk drawing?

Assistant Vice President for Community Suzanne Onorato didn’t want to get fired like so many other administrators for not agreeing with protesting students so she coddled them. “I think it’s wonderful that students are taking a stand for something that they’re passionate about, for something that’s so much about themselves — and we want to support that,” Onorato said. That’s like giving a screaming baby his binky so they shut the hell up and stop crying.

However, now that the innocuous graffiti has garnered such notoriety, the university is going after those impassioned Trump supporters.

The University will review footage “up by the hospital [from] security cameras” to identify those who made the chalkings, Wagner told the protesters. He also added that if they’re students, they will go through the conduct violation process, while if they are from outside of the University, trespassing charges will be pressed.

The problem is that we shouldn’t need a pacifier to mollycoddle young adults. These are people who are in their late teens and early 20s who are preparing to go into the real world. They should not be “triggered” by harmless things like words written in chalk because there will be actual “Trump 2016” signs in the real world and there is no safe spaces and no shoulders of university administrators for you to run to and cry on every time you see something that you don’t agree with.

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