CLEVELAND, OH—An enormous pack of dogs descended on the GOP convention in Cleveland today. Experts say the animals were likely drawn to the event after picking up on the constant, subsonic thrum of racist tirades emanating from the Quicken Loans Arena.

The trouble began as RNC chair Reince Priebus was giving a speech to kick off the convention. He was in the midst of admonishing Black Lives Matter protesters for dividing the country when he was suddenly swarmed by hundreds of barking Chow Chows and Malteses.

The convention quickly descended into chaos. Rudy Giuliani was overheard screaming, "Will somebody arrest these mutts??!" just before he was knocked over by a St. Bernard and covered in thick strings of slobber.

Speaker Paul Ryan was seen pushing elderly supporters between his body and a snarling pack of Dobermans. Governor Scott Walker climbed on top of a podium, tore at his clothes and exclaimed, "Take me now Lord! Take me right now!" before being mauled by a horde of Pomeranians.

Former NCAA basketball coach and famed Trump supporter Bobby Knight was spotted attempting to personally fist fight a Bernese mountain dog.

Meanwhile, Republican candidate Donald Trump attempted to remain the star of the show.

As his sons Eric and Donald Jr. swung improvised torches to hold back the canines, their father started into a rambling press conference.

"Look I love dogs," he stated. "Huge dog guy. And dogs? The love me. Couldn't love me more. In fact, I was told by fortune teller, who is very good, that in a past life I was a dog, a big huge one, so I think I win at –"

Trump was then cut off and quickly buried under a writhing mass of golden retrievers, his stringy gold tresses soon vanishing into a sea of wagging tails.



The only Republican who remained unscathed was Senator Ted Cruz. Whenever even the most ferocious dog would get within an arm's length of him, the animal would begin loudly whimpering as if injured before slinking away, tail between its legs.