There are many traits that people find sexy, but only a handful are universal. These special traits transcend race, gender, body type, culture, and even kinks, to some extent. Not many traits check everyone of those boxes, but toughness is definitely one of them. I would even argue it’s one of the best.

Even without its sexual connotations, toughness in a lover has plenty of appeal. I say that as someone who grew up with some tough individuals, many of which are close relatives. A few served in the military. Some overcame some serious hardship against illness, injury, or poverty. Others are just the kind of people you want on your side in a fight.

I know the value of toughness. I also know that it’s not the same as being physically strong or mentally capable. To be tough is to push yourself in ways that go beyond the call of duty. It often requires that we rise above our limits and expectations. That can mean subjecting ourselves to unpleasant experiences in the name of achieving something greater.

That entire concept is something we want in our lovers. Whether it’s protecting us from harm or birthing our children, we want and need our partners to be tough. Love may bring us together, but toughness makes that love stronger. A tough lover can do many amazing things for a relationship, including the things that are clothing optional. I want this Daily Sexy Musing to highlight this. Enjoy!

We endured the hardship. We fought the obstacles. We overcame the odds. We absorbed the blows. Through each challenge and trial, we feel the sting of strife. At times, it hurts. The pain is real and leaves lingering scars. Sometimes, it’s more subtle. We don’t even feel it, at first. From tasks that strain our minds to feelings that damage our spirits, we are weighted down by many burdens. It hinders our ability to celebrate our love at every turn. Every step comes with struggle. Every reward comes with cost. Every gain comes with loss. A shallow love has no chance. Like thin ice or brittle glass, it shatters at the slightest disruption. You’re not like that and neither am I. Our hearts and souls are more robust than that. I gladly share your pain, just as you eagerly share mine. It leaves us weaker in the moment, but stronger in the long run. Together, we harden ourselves, but strengthen our hearts. We’ll navigate the storm, but never feel wet. I’ll take the hit and I’ll do so with a smile. That’s what love like ours can do. Alone, my first instinct is to avoid hardship. With you, I eagerly endure it. In doing so, I articulate my love without a single word. You get the message, loud and clear. You return the favor, affirming our love and demonstrating your strength. My heart and soul gushes for you. What started with love has become a connection. That connection is strong. That connection is deep. Most importantly, that connection is ours.