













We are marching proudly backwards to the future. Join us.





Decency Manual Now Available! Buy the book and be as decent as Sarah Palin, the next Vice President of the Homeland!!



The Department of Homeland Decency Decency Rules and Regulations Manual Barnes and Noble, Borders, Powells,





Now available at decent book stores in decent neighborhoods everywhere, as well as at Amazon, Majers and Quinn, and Three Rivers Press. Five reasons the Department of Homeland Decency supports Sarah 1. At last: the Patriotic Feminist! The old types of feminists were wordy, intellectual, hairy and hated men, not to mention plain looking and frumpy or worse. But Patriotic Feminists like Sarah hunt moose, and can field dress it, butcher it, carry it home, clean house, set the table, put on makeup, shave their legs, and cook all those moose steaks so dinner is ready by the time her husband and children sit down to dinner. That's Patriotic Feminism and it empowers women everywhere. Patriotic Feminism is decent and wholesome and can be taught to all the next generations of Homelanders! 2.She is married to a man from the rugged frontier of Alaska who understands hard work and real values. He's not going to waste time getting in touch with his feelings or trying to be sensitive. He'll just go out and get things done. And when she needs help, he'll be there to help. Because that's what decent Homeland men do: help out and make sure their women understand things. And when that time of the month comes around and her hormones get a little whacky, he will be there to stabilize things. He's a man the Homeland can trust. 3. She took on the powerful Library Lobby in Wasilla and didn't back down. Librarians tend to obstruct and interfere with decency by buying books about indecent subjects written by those who live indecent lifestyles, which makes libraries very dangerous places for children. Especially the reference Department, where a child can be exposed to âit,â experimental theater, and vegetarianism. But Sarah took that on and risked her political future. That's the kind of guts the Homeland needs now. 4. She's not Hillary. With Sarah in Washington, Hillary won't ever get near the White House again. 5. She is a reformer. She fought corruption and reformed everything in Alaska. She didn't take earmarks and worked hard to bring gas and oil to everyone, which forward-thinking patriots always do. So while everything is falling apart in the lower 48, things are holding together in Alaska. Only the indecent would refuse to accept this as truth!







THE DEPARTMENT'S MOTTO "You have nothing to fear if you have nothing to hide. You have nothing to hide if you have nothing to fear. So fear nothing and you need not hide. Hide nothing and you need not fear."







THE DEPARTMENT'S TIP OF THE DAY "If it looks like a duck, talks like a duck, walks like a duck, does 'it' like a duck, votes Green Party, likes Jon Stewart, buys free-range eggs, is childless by choice, and uses a push mower, it is a duck and must be reported."





Join us as we march proudly backwards to the future. And contact us HERE. Tell us who in your neighborhood isn't so decent. We'll take it from there.





Decent news for Decent folks! Fox wins Rapture rights! Stock rises on news It's now official: God hates the liberal media. That's because Fox won the right to broadcast the Rapture. In a surprise to everyone except decent folk everywhere, Fox now has exclusive rights to the Rapture, including the name, book rights, movie rights, and product tie-ins. Other networks can't even use the word Rapture without mentioning that Fox News. "We went after this because we know Fox is filled with decent, upright, liberal-bashing, true believers and the other networks aren't," a FOX spokesman said. "We want decency to return to the Homeland and to televisions everywhere. That's why Fox has to be the one to broadcast the Rapture. Who wants Anderson Cooper or Keith Olbermann to broadcast it? Maybe a secular humanist pinko Homeland hating college professor!" No one at Fox has explained, however, who might want to watch a telecast of The Rapture if the world truly ends then. Or who would want to read the books, watch the movies, or buy T-shirts and coffee cups with something like "The Rapture brought to you by Fox" written on them. Despite that inherent contradiction, Fox executives are very upbeat, as are Fox stockholders. Fox stock went up 50 percent on news of this upcoming telecast. "We are proud to show this event because we expect it to surpass the combined popularity of the Super Bowl, World Series, Masters Golf Tournament, and Florida 2000 vote count," a Fox spokesman said. "Viewers should be extremely excited about this. Nothing like this has ever been on TV before. Not even The O'Reilly Factor, as important as that show is, could hope to be this big." Exactly when this will be on TV is uncertain. Whether this deal is legal is another stumbling block. Regardless of that, however, Fox wants to broadcast at least one more run of American Idol, so if The Rapture comes a little earlier than TV programming would allow, the the Rapture won't be shown live.











