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Trying to be effortless doesn't come easy

Every day now, twice a day, I sit for 20 minutes. You might look at me and think that I am meditating. And technically that is what I am doing. What I am doing in reality is sitting thinking. And every now and then I remember not to get carried away with my thoughts. Rather than letting it annoy me that I have run away with my thoughts again, I simply take this as "the green light to go back to my mantra". And I get back to it briefly, before I go off on the next train of thought. And all the while I'm trying not to try, because it's supposed to be effortless.