[Previous installments of Sekocom, Inc. games include DISADVENTURE!, DISADDENDUM!, DISMORALIZED!, DISINSOMNIA!, WHARTON!, GRADING! and DISBELIEF!. This installment holds no candle to those but since its sell-by date is fast approaching I figure better late than never.]

Copyright (c) 1980, 1982, 2006, 2012 Sekocom, Inc. All rights reserved. DISCONVENTION! is a registered trademark of Sekocom, Inc. Revision 23 / Serial number 8940729 West of Apartment Complex You are standing in an open field west of a white townhouse, with a boarded front door. There is a small mailbox here. > e The door is locked. > fuck door I strongly advise against that course of action. > fuck you We only just met. > open door The door is still locked. > FUCK DOOR Fine. After a vigorous rutting, the rusted hinges snap and the frustrated door bends until its disappointed timbers give up and finish clattering themselves to the ground alone. You are standing in an open field west of a white townhouse, with a open door and an unsatisfied pile of wood. There is a small mailbox here. > e You are in the kitchen of the white townhouse. A table seems to have been used recently for the preparation of food. Next to it is an empty chair. A passage leads to the west, and a dark staircase can be seen leading upward. To the east is a small window which is open. On the table is an elongated brown sack, smelling of hot peppers. A clear glass bottle is here. The glass bottle contains: A quantity of water. > w You are standing in an open field west of a white townhouse, with a open door and an unsatisfied pile of wood. There is a small mailbox here. > look wood The pile of wood refuses to return eye contact. > FUCK WOOD Haven’t you done enough already? Leave the poor pile of wood alone. Just go east. > FUCK EAST You cannot have sexual intercourse with a cardinal direction.