It’s a debate for the ages. Should our terrier Libby be allowed to sleep with us each night…or should she be made to stay in her crate? Practical people remind us that Libby is a dog. “Don’t allow her on furniture of any kind, including the bed,” they say. Then there are the softies. “What’s the harm of her sleeping with you? Dogs need their packs.” My husband Randy and I are confused.

What’s odd is that Libby used to love her crate. She’d sleep in our bed once in a while, but only on “special occasions” or when we were too lazy to put her back.

But most nights when asked if she wanted “Bed?” she’d jump up and trot to the kitchen. She’d nudge the metal door of her pink crate open and snuggle inside. She’d sleep peacefully till morning. Everything was fine.

And then things went horribly awry.

For reasons known only to Libby, she now refuses to use her crate… ever.

I put her to bed at the usual time. She waits about fifteen minutes and then starts whining — louder and louder — until the whole house is woken, not good for my son Paul who needs to be at work by 7:00 a.m. I come to the kitchen, let her out, and she zooms back to our bed like an escaped prisoner.

What happened?

I’ve checked everything, but nothing seems amiss. There are the usual doggie smells from soft towels to her favorite items in the world – Randy’s black Fruit of the Loom socks (the more used the better). I’ve even found a half-eaten snack bag of Cheetos in there, like it’s a pint-size dorm room.

But still, no deal. Randy and I have asked fellow dog owners for suggestions. Two camps have emerged.

“She’s an animal,” says one group. “Libby should know her place, which is the crate. You’re the boss.” Even worse, they admonish me. “She’s training you,” they say. I blush in embarrassment, caught being manipulated by an eleven pound terrier.

Then there’s the looser crowd. “Dogs hate being alone. They need “the pack.” That’s how they feel safe. What’s the harm?”

Randy and I weigh the pluses and minuses.

On one hand, it’s easier to let her sleep with us. I don’t have to go through the charade of putting her in the crate at night, only to have her cry, and then having to let her out.

She’s also portable. I know people who sleep with full-grown German Shepherds or Dalmatians, which is too much dog flesh for me in my bed. But Libby’s the size of a cat and fits without any problem. (Randy will argue that sometimes she snuggles so close, he wakes up two inches from the edge of our California King, but I digress).

Plus, there’s something sweet and cozy about sleeping with our beloved little Yorkie. Especially if I wake at 3:00 a.m., I know that hamster wheel is waiting with its thoughts of pandemics, plane crashes, and election drama. I reach out and touch the soft fur of Libby. I feel her steady breathing and my own breathing slows. Somehow with Libby near, things don’t seem so bad.

But there is one minus – and it’s a big one.

Once in a while, Libby will hear or smell something outside at 2:00 a.m. She’ll jump up, frantically growling and yapping. Randy and I will spring awake, hearts beating fast. What’s in the woods? A deer? Mountain lion? Big Foot?

That’s when our resolve strengthens to keep Libby in her crate. But then the whining starts again, and I remind myself most nights are fine, and she’s back in our bed.

On and on we go and now we wonder, what’s worse?

Having the occasional night when Libby alerts us there’s an ax murderer in the backyard?

Or making her whine herself to sleep, which could take hours?

Maybe its part of her getting older. Next birthday, she’ll turn seven. Already she uses a trunk at the end of our bed to get onboard. Leaping four feet is no longer done.

Like all our pets, this little dog will age… and someday she’ll be gone.

And what will I regret more? Not being stricter and keeping her in that crate… or allowing her to stay and feeling her soft fur at 3:00 a.m.?

What are your thoughts? Comments are always welcome.

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