Satan in a monkey suit!

For years now, children all over the world have spent many hours reading Curious George books at school, the library, or at home. We all remember the cartoon, with that happy-go-lucky theme song, but what messages are actually being portrayed in the books? In particular, the first book. Has anyone ever asked your parents what happened to you? Or maybe your parents have asked that to themselves. Well, after careful study I have found out why our generation is as messed up as it is. It's not television. It's not music. It's not our brothers or sisters. It's the anti-christ of children's literature, Curious George!!!!!!

Now....you probably assume that I'm sitting here in front of my computer stoned on something with no clue as to what I'm saying, but give me a moment to explain. If you have the oppurtunity to read the book once again, I suggest you go ahead and do so. I recently read this tale of terror to my neice and nephew, and I was shocked at what I found. I'll go ahead and list certain quotes from the book below, with pictures, and you'll see the hidden messages that were so cleverly portrayed.

Taken from page 10:

The man picked him up quickly and popped him into a bag. George was caught.

This disturbing little clip from the book promotes kidnapping of all things! Now what is a child supposed to think here. Day in and day out kids are told to never talk to strangers, yet their little pal here is kidnapped, and if you read on you'll find that he actually likes it. Sick!

Taken from page 26:

After a good meal and a good pipe George felt very tired.

Now what do we have here? We can hardly turn our heads now a days without hearing about teens smoking, and the media and politicians blame it on the cigarette manufacturers ads. Curious George sits in his chair smoking. And how old was he again???? It makes you wonder just what exactly it is that he's smoking. After all, teens don't just smoke tobacco.

Taken from page 30:

George was curious. He wanted to telephone, too. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven. What fun!

Crank calling. We've all done it at one point or another, but what exactly made us do it in the first place. I mean, the thought of picking up the telephone and radomly dialing someone just to cause trouble is kind of disturbing. Just another friendly idea from our not too friendly pal Curious George.

Taken from page 36:

"Oh, catch him, catch him," they cried. George tried to run away.

Now what do we have here. A young lad running from the law. Like this never happens in real life. More and more youths are breaking the law, and something must have possessed them to do it. Could it have been the 5 or more Curious George books that they read in grade school? I think so!

Taken from page 38:

They took him away and shut him in a prison.

They take him and throw him in jail without trial. They didn't even read him his rights. Now, this isn't really his fault, but it's still a sad message to be portraying to kids. What's even worse is Curious George is brown, and that makes it a racial issue which is no laughing matter!

Taken from page 40:

...quick as lightning, George ran out through the open door.

Wonderful, now kids everywhere believe that it's okay to be a fugitive from the law. Bad move Georgie, but then again, he's bad to begin with!

Taken from page 44:

He felt he MUST have a bright red balloon. He reached over and tried to help himself.

So let's see what's happened to this guy so far. He's been kidnapped, he's broken the law on 2 seperate occasions, and now he's going for a third. Let's read the paper now. As I thought! Local youth arrested for the third time. Do we sense a pattern here?

Taken from page 52:

Then he paid the balloon man for all the ballons.

Our last example of why this book should be burned is the fact that after breaking all the laws that he did, Curious George gets away and suffers no consequences at all! A child would believe that crime is okay, and nothing would become of breaking the law.

I hope you all realize now the damage that this book can and has caused to many children over the years. People don't grow up tp be nuts, it's books like this that get them there. Now, we could pin all the blame on the author, but I don't think it was his fault. I think Satan possessed him to write these books as part of his master plan for world domination. After all, H. A. Rey's other books are perfectly harmless!

With all of this in mind, let's look at a few important notes to keep in mind.

Curious George is Satan, and also goes by the names of Lucifer, Kathy Lee Gifford, Bealzabob, Ricki Lake, Primate of Pain, Bob Saget, Monkey of Mayhem, Richard Simmons, and many many more. Remeber, he is Satan and thusly he can change his form and sex as he chooses.

Curious George is also borderline gay. Now, this isn't evil at all, but it's definately odd for a monkey. Makes you wonder now doesn't it...

It was stated that a monkey was the first true carrier of the HIV virus, a truely evil disease. Hmmm, let's see. Monkey, Aids. Curious George, Satan. Put two and two together and figure it out for yourself.

To sum it all up, if you are a parent, keep your children away from Curious George books. They are the modern version of the Necronomicon and should be avoided at all costs.

If you are a child, and thought that this was a cute little page about a cute little monkey with cute little pictures and so on and so forth, and you choose to continue reading Curious George novels, you're going to grow up and become one of the following:

Murderer

Drug dealer

Drug addict

Kidnapper

Politician

Whino

Infomercial Host or Hostess

Much Music/MTV Video Jockey

Model/Host for the Shopping Channel

A really grumpy old man who lives at the top of a hill in a haunted house

Kids, do yourself a favour and read something worth while. Avoid books containg cute little animals. Read sports magazines or choose you own adventure books. These will stimulate your mind and benefit you in the future so you can choose any of the above professions on you own free will.

Come on...you wanna sign it...I know you do.

All pictures, quotes, the Curious George logo and everything else pertaining to Curious George except my opinions are copyright Houghton Miffin Company 1993. All rights reserved.

All opinions expressed in this page are those of my own mind, body, and soul. Not many animals were hurt in the creation of this page, but accidents do happen. Many thanks to Satan for all his input on what Curious George really stood for. Satan would like to thank all his family and friends, and would like to say: