WA Court: Woman Not Allowed to Wear Bikini

For those of you who may not have been following all the important news out here in the great northwest, we’ve had some issues in recent months involving so called “bikini baristas”. Since the supply side of the market for espresso has become overcrowded, and the customers more cash-strapped, some drive through stands have embraced a new model: attracting the creepy old dude market by dressing beautiful young women in bikinis and lingerie.

This has drawn a shitstorm of rage from the holier-than-thou activists who seem to think this is far worse than what their kids might see on TV, the internet, or the beach. Some douchebags have gone so far as to camp out in front of these places and take pictures and notes of all the patrons and than rat them out to their employers and post their identities online. My position on this has always been simple: I probably wouldn’t frequent one of these places because it honestly seems a little… creepy/uncomfortable to me. But I sure as hell don’t see how the government has any business telling private citizens that they can’t wear a bikini, as though bikinis are harmful to children if they’re worn in the city, but if they’re worn on the beach they are magically benign. Go figure.

In any case, an Everett “Judge” Timothy O’Dell disagrees with me. My world is shattered.

The Daily Herald reports she is allowed to serve her time under home electronic monitoring. Judge Timothy O’Dell also ordered the woman to be fully clothed — no bikini or lingerie — when she works at an espresso stand.

[Emphasis mine]. The woman in question was arrested on charges of prostitution, but that was reduced to “providing adult entertainment without a license”. Because, if you’re going to perform sexual favors for money the pimp government is damn well going to get its cut.

In honor of Judge O’Dell and the city of Everett below are some highly relevant photos of the kind of baristas we’re talking about. After the jump.