HELLO ? ANYBODY IN THERE ? OH, NO, IT'S THE MAN-BOYWHO KILLED MOMMY ! HE'S COME TOKILL US NOW ! IT'S OKAY, I DIED INSIDE WHENMOMMY WAS KILLED ANYWAYS. YEAH, BETTER THISTHAN THE SLOW DEATH WE'D FACE WITHOUTA MOTHER AROUND. LOOK, I'M SORRYI KILLED YOUR MOM. THE SQUIRREL TOLD MESHE WAS EVIL. YOU GOT TRICKEDBY A SQUIRREL ? GEE, YOU'RE NOT TOO SMART,ARE YA MISTER ? I'M TRYING TO MAKE THISALL RIGHT AGAIN, BUT THE ONLY THING THAT CANSTOP DEVIL-WORSHIPPING CRITTERS IS A MOUNTAIN LION. YEAH,AND YOU KILLED HER. WELL, YOU'RE MOUNTAIN LIONS. US ?NAWWW, WE'RE JUST KIDS. WE STILL HAVEOUR BABY TEETH. AND BABY CLAWS. AND A DEAD MOM. THERE STILL HAS TO BEA WAY FOR YOU TO KILLTHE PORCUPINE'S BABY. WHAT ?YOU MEAN LIKE AN ABORTION ? YEAH, AN ABORTION !THAT COULD WORK ! BUT... WE DON'T KNOWHOW TO GIVE ABORTIONS. DO YOU KNOW SOMEPLACEWE CAN LEARN, MISTER ? "WHERE CAN THEY LEARN THAT ?"THE BOY SAID WITH A FROWN. "I KNOW, THE ABORTION CLINICJUST OUTSIDE OF TOWN !" WHAT ? SO HE PICKED UP THE CUBS ANDDOWN THE MOUNTAIN HE STORMED, AND TOOK THEM TO WHEREABORTIONS ARE PERFORMED ! NO, HE DIDN'T. YES, HE DID. NO, HE DIDN'T ! YES, HE DID. NO, HE DIDN'T ! YES, HE... DID ! AW, GOD DAMMIT ! ... SAID THE BOYIN THE RED POOFBALL HAT ! WE'VE MADE IT ALREADY,LITTLE CUBS, FANCY THAT ! EXCUSE ME,WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE ? ... THE ABORTION DOCTORINQUIRED. IF YOU WANNA BE IN THE O.R,A PASS IS REQUIRED ! I DON'T KNOW, I'M SUPPOSEDTO SHOW THESE MOUNTAIN LIONS HOW ABORTIONS ARE PERFORMEDOR SOMETHING. I KNOW,IT'S RIDICULOUS. WELL, YOU'RE IN LUCK,I'M HAPPY TO INFORM. ITS ONLY THREE DAYSUNTIL CHRISTMAS SO I HAVE LOTS OFABORTIONS TO PERFORM ! GATHER ROUND MY TABLECUTE LITTLE LIONS, I'LL TEACH YOU TO DO ABORTIONSWITHOUT EVEN TRYIN' ! AND SO THE LITTLE BOYAND THE CUBS GATHERED 'ROUNDTHE CHAIR BASE AND ALL DAY WATCHED ABORTIONAFTER ABORTION TAKE PLACE. ♪ CHRISTMAS TIMEIS ONCE A YEAR ♪ ♪ EVERY CREATUREHOLDS IT DEAR ♪ ♪ EVERY ANIMAL BIG OR SMALL ♪ CHRISTMAS MEANS SO MUCHTO US ALL ♪ ♪ IT'S ONCE A YEARIT'S CHRISTMAS TIME ♪ ♪ AND IT HAPPENS ONCE A YEAR ♪ IT'S ONCE A YEARAT CHRISTMAS TIME ♪ ♪ WHEN WE HEAR ABOUT HOWCHRISTMAS ONLY COMES ♪ ♪ ONCE A YEAR... ♪ THIS BETTERHAVE A POINT, DUDE. THIS REALLY BETTERHAVE A POINT.

♪ WHAT A SPECIAL TIMEAND SPECIAL DAY ♪ ♪ IT'S WOODLAND CRITTERCHRISTMAS ♪ HAIL SATAN ! ( narrator )T'WAS THE NIGHTBEFORE CHRISTMAS AND ABOVE THE WOODSWAY UP HIGH, A NEW BRIGHT SHINY STARHUNG IN THE SKY... FOR THE WORLD TO BE SAVEDTHERE WAS ONLY ONE SHOT, A LITTLE BOY WITH THREE CUBSWITH AN ABORTION PLOT. OKAY, COME ON,THE CRITTERS ARE OVER THIS WAY. YOU MOUNTAIN LIONS READYTO STOP THE ANTICHRISTFROM BEING BORN ? SURE, WE KNOW HOW TOGIVE ABORTIONS NOW ! HE ARRIVED AT THE CRITTER FORESTREADY TO FIGHT BUT THEN GASPED WHEN HE SAWA MOST DREADFUL SIGHT-- GOSH, WE DID IT ! THE CRITTER ANTICHRISTIS BORN. BRINGING A THOUSAND YEARSOF DARKNESS TO THE FOREST. GRGGLGLGL ! THE ANTICHRIST HAD BEEN BORN,SEALING THE WORLD'S FATE. THE BOY INTHE RED POOF BALL HAT... WAS TOO LATE. TOO LATE ? WHAT THE HELLIS THAT ? OH, HI-YA,STANNIE ! STAN ! STAN WHAT THE HELLIS GOING ON ?! IT'S CRITTER CHRISTMAS DUDE,IT SUCKS ASS! NOW ALL WE GOT TO DO IS PUT THEANTICHRIST INTO OUR HUMAN HOST ! YEAH !WOO-HOO ! THAT'S IT ? 10,000 YEARS OF DARKNESS AND IDON'T HAVE A MERRY CHRISTMAS ? WHEN UP THE SKY, THE SOUND OF SLEIGH BELLSWERE HEARD ! AND A JOLLY RED SLEIGH FLEWDOWN TO EARTH LIKE A BIRD ! HEY, LOOK !ITS SANTIE CLAUS! YEA !YEA !YEA ! LET'S EATHIS FLESH ! ALL RIGHT, WHAT THE HELLIS GOING ON ? WHY IS THERE A RED STARGLOWING IN THE SKY ? WE FINALLY DID IT,SANTA ! WE BROUGHT FORTH THEANTICHRIST WITH HELP FROMOUR GOOD FRIEND STANNIE ! DEATH AND PAIN AWAITALL LIVING THINGS ! LITTLE BOY,YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED! I DIDN'T MEAN TO HELP THEM,I TRIED TO STOP THEM ! WELL, GOOD GOING, STUPID ! THERE'S ONLY ONE WAY TO STOPDEVIL-WORSHIPING CRITTERS ! AAAGHGH !AAAGHGH ! DUDE, WHAT THE... ? COME ON, DUDE. GEE WIZ, SANTA, YOU'RE NOTGONNA KILL ME ARE Y-- BUT SANTA, WHAT DO WEDO ABOUT THE ANTICHRIST ? DON'T WORRY, BOYS,THE ANTICHRIST CANNOT SURVIVE WITHOUT A HUMAN HOST BODYTO GO INTO. NO... NO, I WANT TO HAVETHE ANTICHRIST INSIDE ME ! WHAT...KYLE ! WITH HIS POWER, I CAN FINALLY MAKE THE EARTHA BETTER PLACE FOR THE JEWS ! DON'T DO IT, KYLE ! AARRHGHGH ! DUDE ! YES... YES ! NOW THE JEWS SHALLTAKE CONTROL OF CHRISTMAS ONCE AND FOR ALL...AHAHAHAAHAA ! ( Kyle )OH, STOP IT CARTMAN !

THAT'S ENOUGH ! YOU AREN'T READING ANOTHERSENTENCE OF YOUR STUPID STORY ! I DON'T BELIEVE ANYONEINTERRUPTED YOU WHEN YOU READ YOURCHRISTMAS STORY ALOUD, KYLE. THIS WHOLE TIME YOURSTUPID STORY WAS JUST A WAY TO RIP ON ME FOR BEING JEWISHAT CHRISTMAS AGAIN ! MR. GARRISON COULD YOUDO SOMETHING, PLEASE ? SORRY ERIC, BUT IF KYLE FEELSDISCRIMINATED AGAINST YOU'LL HAVE TO STOP OR ELSEI'LL GET A CALL FROM HIS MOTHER. ALRIGHT, FINE,FORGET IT ! WELL, BUT...BUT WHAT HAPPENED ? YEAH, DID KYLE BRING 1,000YEARS OF DARKNESS OR NOT ? WHAT HAPPENSTO THE LION CUBS ? WELL, I GUESSWE'LL NEVER KNOW BECAUSE KYLE DOESN'T WANNAHEAR HOW IT ENDS. NO, IT ALL WORKED OUT,RIGHT ? THE WORLD WAS SAVED AND I WENTHOME FOR CHRISTMAS DINNER. DUDE, WHY DO YOU CARE ?! AFTER ALL THATI AT LEAST WANNA KNOW IF I HAD A MERRY CHRISTMAS ORIF DARKNESS RULES THE EARTH. OH, COME ON !IT'S OBVIOUS WHAT HAPPENS. I GET KILLED BY SANTA CLAUSESO THAT CHRISTMAS IS SAVED ! THAT'S NOT AT ALLWHAT HAPPENS. AW, COME ON,LET HIM READ US THE END ! YEAH, YEAH,COME ON... YEAH !LET HIM DO IT ! ALL RIGHT,FINE ! A-A-AHEM... "OH, DEAR, MY BEST FRIEND ISPOSSESSED, HOW ABOUT THAT !" SAID THE LITTLE BOYIN THE RED POOF BALL HAT... HA HA HAAA ! NOW I SHALL RULE THE--UGHH... AAHGHGH... GOD IT BURNS ! AAHHHH...MY SOUL IS ON FIRE ! OHHH, I DON'T LIKE THIS. I DIDN'T KNOW IT WOULDFEEL SO... DARK AND EVIL ! WELL WHAT DIDYOU EXPECT, DUDE ? IT'S THE SON OFTHE DEVIL. OH GOD,WHAT HAVE I DONE ? I'M SORRY, PLEASE... I DON'T WANNA BE THE VESSELFOR THE ANTICHRIST ! I'M SORRY BUT IT'STOO LATE, KYLE. SANTA'S GONNAHAVE TO KILL YOU. NO, SANTA DON'T ! WE DON'T HAVE A CHOICE,IN A FEW HOURS THE DARK CREATURE INSIDEHIM WILL CONSUME HIS SOUL ! THE LITTLE BOY FRETTED,HE ALMOST STARTED TO BAWL... BUT THAT'S WHEN HE CAME UPWITH THE BEST IDEA OF ALL. THE LION CUBS ! ... THE LITTLE BOYQUICKLY BEGUN... I TOOK THEM TO SEEHOW ABORTIONS ARE DONE ! WHAT ? NOW, CUBS DO LIKE THEYSHOWED YOU, HURRY UP FAST GET THE ANTICHRIST OFMY FRIEND KYLE'S ASS ! AND IN THETWINKLING STARLIGHT EACH LITTLE CUBDID THEIR PORTION. THEY REMEMBERED ALLTHEY HAD LEARNED AND GAVE KYLE AN ABORTION. AARHGHGH... ! GAGAHRHGRH... ! KILL, DESTROY ! GHGHRHRHG ! KILL, DESTORY ! GAGAHRHGRH-- THANKS, EVERYBODY. I'M SORRY I GOTA LITTLE CRAZY THERE. WELL, LITTLE BOY, IT SEEMS THAT YOU HAVEREALLY BEEN THROUGH A LOT. IS THERE ANY SPECIAL PRESENTYOU WOULD LIKE THIS YEAR ? YEAH...YEAH THERE IS. WHAT... OH MY,WHAT HAPPENED ? MOMMY ? YEA !YOU'RE BACK ! WE MISSED YOU MOMMY! OH, GOOD. AND BACK HOME,THERE WERE PRESENTS AND LOTS OF FOOD TO GET FAT AND IT WAS THE BESTCHRISTMAS EVER FOR THE BOY INTHE RED POOF BALL HAT. AND THEY ALL LIVEDHAPPILY EVER AFTER. EXCEPT FOR KYLE WHO DIED OF AIDSTWO WEEKS LATER. ( Kyle )GOD DAMMIT CARTMAN ! ♪ CHRISTMAS TIMEIS ONCE A YEAR ♪

( narrator )WAY UP IN THE MOUNTAINSIN A SMALL LITTLE TOWN... THE MAIN STREET WAS BEINGDECORATED ALL UP AND DOWN. PEOPLE STOOD IN LONG LINES SOMETIMES WAITINGHOURS OR MORE... BECAUSE CHRISTMAS NEEDSTO BE BOUGHT IN A STORE. BUT OUT IN THE FORESTNOT TOO FAR AWAY... THE LITTLE WOODLAND CRITTERS WERE ALSO PREPARINGFOR THEIR CHRISTMAS DAY. ♪ ITS ALMOST TIME WHENTHE TIME IS HERE ♪ ♪ THE TIME THAT'SONLY ONCE A YEAR ♪ ♪ WE CAN HARDLY WAIT'CAUSE IT'S SO NEAR ♪ ♪ A WOODLAND CRITTERCHRISTMAS ♪♪ THE LITTLE CRITTERS WORKED HARDAS THEY HAPPILY SANG AND EACH ONE OF THEMHAD A QUITE INTERESTING NAME. THERE WAS SQUIRRELIETHE SQUIRREL RABBITIE THE RABBIT BEAVERIE THE BEAVERAND BEARIE THE BEAR. PORCUPINIE THE PORCUPINE,SKUNKIE THE SKUNK FOXIE THE FOXAND DEERIE, THE DEER. WOODPECKERIE THE WOODPECKER,MOUSIE THE MOUSE AND CHICKADEE-EE,THE CHICKADEE ALL MADETHE FOREST THEIR HOUSE. AND ON THAT MAGICAL DAY,STUMBLING UPON ALL OF THAT-- WAS A SURPRISEDLITTLE BOY... IN A RED POOF BALL HAT. WHAT THE HELL... ? ♪ CHRISTMAS TIMEIS ONCE A YEAR ♪ ♪ EVERY CRITTERHOLDS IT DEAR ♪ ♪ EVERY ANIMAL BIG OR SMALL ♪ CHRISTMAS MEANSSO MUCH TO US ALL ♪♪ WELL,HELLO THERE ! WELCOME TOOUR FOREST. HOW DO YOU LIKE OURCHRISTMAS TREE ? IT'S NICE... WHY, IT'S THE MOST PERFECTTREE IN THE FOREST ! YEA !YEA ! OH, NO,I SEE A PROBLEM ! WHAT IS IT,MOUSIE ? OUR CHRISTMAS TREEDOESN'T HAVE A STAR ! AWWW...AWWW... WE CAN'T HAVE A TREEWITH NO STAR ON IT. WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO ? NOW DON'T BEDOWN, YA'LL. MAYBE OUR NEW FRIENDCAN HELP US FIND A STAR. CAN YOU ?WOULD YOU ?REALLY ? OKAY, OKAY... YEA !YEA ! AND SO, USING SOME PAPERAND WORKING WITH GLEE THE BOY IN THERED POOF BALL HAT MADE A STARFOR THE TREE. AHHH...AHHH... IT'S THE NICEST STARI EVER SAW ! THE LITTLE CRITTERS CHEEREDAND BEAVIE SAID WITH A SMILE... HOW WOULD YOU LIKE TO SING ANDDANCE WITH US FOR A WHILE ? THE BOY IN THE RED POOF BALL HATSMILED AND SAID... UH... NO THANKS,I'M GONNA GO HOME. G'BYE STANNIE ! G'BYE !SEE YA ! WUF...

HI, STANNIE !HI, STANNIE ! AW... WHA ? HIS FRIENDSWERE ALL THERE ! WHAT A WONDERFULSURPRISE ! THE LITTLE BOY SMILEDWITH JOY IN HIS EYES ! WHAT TIME IS IT ? YOU AREN'T GONNA BELIEVEWHAT HAPPENED, STANNIE. IT'S THE MOST MAGICALCHRISTMAS GIFT EVER ! PORCUPINIE IS PREGNANT ! YOU GUYS, I HAVE TOGO TO SCHOOL TOMORROW. I DEDUCE THE MANBOYDOESN'T UNDERSTAND THE SERIOUSNESSOF THE FERTILIZATION ! PORCUPINIE IS A VIRGIN,STANNIE. HER CONCEPTIONWAS IMMACULATE ! SHE'S GOING TO GIVE BIRTHTO OUR LORD AND SAVIOR ! WHAT ? IT HAS BEEN FORETOLD UNTO ME THAT I WOULD GIVE BIRTHON CHRISTMAS DAY ! SO SOON ! HOW DELIGHTFUL ! OUR SOULS ARE SAVED ! FINALLY, THE CRITTERSARE GONNA HAVE A SAVIOR OF THEIR VERY OWNOF THEIR VERY OWN ! YEA !YEA !YEA ! THERE'S JUSTONE PROBLEM... WE DON'T HAVE A MANGER FOROUR SAVIOR TO BE BORN IN. AWWW !AWWW !AWWW ! BUT WE GOTTO HAVE A MANGER ! CAN YOU DO IT,STAN ? CAN YOU BUILD USA MANGER, HUH ? YEA !YEA !YEA ! "OF COURSE I'LL BUILD YOUA MANGER !" THE LITTLE BOY CRIED. AND HE WINKED ATHIS CRITTER FRIENDS AND LEAPT TO THEIR SIDE ! AND OUT IN THE WOODS,THE BOY STEAMED RIGHT AHEAD MAKING A PLACE FOR THE CRITTERBABE TO LAY ITS SWEET HEAD. GEE WIZ, IF IT ISN'T THENICEST MANGER I EVER SAW ! I DEDUCE THAT IT SHALL SERVEAS A PERFECTLY SUITABLE RESTING PLACEFOR THE SON OF OUR LORD ! DOES THIS MEAN WE CANGO TO SLEEP NOW ? MY SON WILL HAVE THE NICESTBED IN ALL THE FOREST ! FIT FOR A KING ! THIS IS GONNA BE THE BESTCRITTER CHRISTMAS EVER ! ♪ IT'S ALMOST TIMEWHEN THE TIME IS HERE ♪ ♪ THE TIME THAT'S ONLYONCE A YEAR-- ♪ ALL RIGHT,I'M GOING NOW. ( growl ) AAAH !AAAH ! THE MOUNTAIN LION ! HIDE ! GO AWAY, SHOO ! ( growl ) IS IT GONE ? I DEDUCE IT IS ! I'M NOC-C-COMING OUT ! WELL, THIS IS THE END. THE MOUNTAIN LION OBVIOUSLYKNOWS PORCUPINIE IS PREGNANT AND ITS GOING TOKILL IT AGAIN ! AGAIN ? EVERY CHRISTMAS,THE MOUNTAIN LION COMES DOWN AND EATS THE VIRGIN CRITTER IMPREGNATED WITHTHE SON OF OUR LORD. OH DEAR,I'M SO VERY AFRAID ! LET'S FACE IT, THE MOUNTAIN LION WILL NEVERLET OUR SAVIOR BE BORN ! AWWW...AWWW... HEY, WE SHOULDN'T BEUPSET THIS CHRISTMAS WE'VE GOT STANNIE ! OF COURSE,STANNIE CAN DO ANYTHING ! IF HE CAN BUILD A MANGER HE CAN STOP THAT MEAN OL'MOUNTAIN LION ! CHRISTMAS IS SAVED ! YEA !YEA ! HIGH UP OVER THE FOREST,ON A DARK, CRAGGILY PEAK

THE HORRID MOUNTAIN LIONLIVED AND PREYED ON THE WEAK. FOR THE CRITTERS TO BE SAVED SOMEONE HAD TO STOPTHAT NASTY OLD CAT-- GOD DAMMIT,THIS IS ---KING RIDICULOUS. --SAID THE LITTLE BOYIN THE RED POOF BALL HAT. KILLING A MOUNTAIN LIONWAS NO EASY TASK. BUT HE THOUGHT OF A PLAN...AND HE THOUGHT OF IT FAST ! GARGRGRGG...GRGRGRRRGRR ! COME ON OUT ! ( growl ) COME ON,CRITTER KILLER ! YOUR DAYS OF SLAUGHTERINGINNOCENT LITTLE ANIMALSARE OVER ! RARGHGHGH ! ( growl ) RARRRRRR ! ( growl ) AAH ! IN A FLASH IT WAS OVER,A VICTORIOUS BLOW ! THE MOUNTAIN LION LAY SLAINON THE COLD GROUND BELOW. OKAY, THERE. MOMMY...MOMMY ! W-W-WAKE UP, MOMMY,WAKE UP... DON'T LEAVE US,MOMMY. MAN-BOY... WHY ? WHY DID YOUKILL OUR MOMMY, WHY ? I... THE CRITTERS... THEY'RE...BIRTH OF THE SAVIOR... THE TINY CUBS ALLGATHERED TOGETHER AND CRIED, ALL ALONE IN THE WORLD BECAUSETHEIR MOTHER HAD DIED. AW... AWWW !

OOH... YOU ALL RIGHT,LADY PORCUPINIE ? OH YES... JUST FELTA LITTLE KICK IS ALL. WELL, IT'S BEENMUCH TOO LONG NOW. I'M AFRAID OUR HELPFUL FRIENDSTANNIE MUST BE VERY DEAD. YES, THE MOUNTAIN LIONPROBABLY SWALLOWED HIM WHOLE. I GUESS THAT MEANS... OUR SAVIOR IS GONNA BEMADE INTO SAVIOR STEW. AWWW...AWWW... WAIT A MINUTE,LOOK ! STANNIE !STANNIE ! STANNIE,YOU'RE ALIVE ! BUT DOES THAT MEAN... YOU KILLEDTHE MOUNTAIN LION ? IT'S DEAD. FOR REALAND FOR TRUE ? ARE YOU SURE ? I'M SURE, IT WON'T BEHURTING YOU ANYMORE. HE DID IT ! NOW OUR CRITTER CHRISTMASCAN FINALLY HAPPEN ! HAIL SATAN ! HAIL SATAN !HAIL SATAN ! WAIT... WHAT ? YOU'VE DONE USA HUGE FAVOR, STANNIE ! WITHOUT THE MOUNTAIN LIONAROUND, LASY PORCUPINIE CAN GIVEBIRTH TO THE ANTICHRIST ! YEA !YEA ! WAIT, WAIT...THE ANTICHRIST ? YOU SAID SHE WAS GIVING BIRTHTO YOUR SAVIOR ! YES, TO THE SON OF OUR LORD,SATAN, PRINCE OF DARKNESS. BUT I THOUGHT YOU MEANTTHE SON OF GOD ! WELL, THINK ABOUT IT. YOU REALLY THINK GOD WOULDHAVE SEX WITH A PORCUPINE ? NO WAY ! ONLY SATAN,PRINCE OF DARKNESS AND KING OF ALL EVILWOULD DO THAT-- YEA ! THIS IS CAUSEFOR CELEBRATION. LET'S SACRIFICE RABBITIEAND EAT HIS FLESH ! YEA, SACRIFICE METO THE DEVIL ! YEA !YEA !YEA ! AAGHGHGH ! AHGHGHGH ! DRINK HIS BLOOD,DRINK HIS BLOOD ! RARHRHGHGGH ! BLOOD ORGY ! YEA, BLOOD ORGY ! BLOOD ORGY, YEA !

♪ WHAT A SPECIAL TIME,A SPECIAL DAY ♪ ♪ IT'S WOODLAND CRITTERCHRISTMAS ♪♪ HAIL SATAN ! ( narrator )IN THE GENTLE FOREST CLEARINGON CHRISTMAS EVE MORN, THE LITTLE FOREST CRITTERS PREPARED FOR THE ANTICHRISTTO BE BORN. THE NOBLE MOUNTAIN LION HAD STOPPED EVILIN ALL THE YEARS PAST, BUT NOW THE GOOD PROTECTOR LAYDEAD AS THE GOOD OWLS AMASSED. AND MEANWHILE, THREE LION CUBSWERE CRYING AWAY. FOR THEM, THERE WOULDCERTAINLY BE NO CHRISTMAS DAY. AND SOON THE FOREST WOULD SUFFERFROM THE OFFSPRING SATAN BEGAT. ALL THIS BECAUSE OFTHE LITTLE BOY... IN THE RED POOF BALL HAT. UGH... NOW THAT HE'D KILLEDTHE NOBLE LION QUEEN, THERE WAS NOBODY TO STOPTHE APOCALYPSE, IT SEEMED. AGHGHGGH ! "I KNOW !" HE SAIDWITH A NEW HAPPY GRIN. "I'LL GO BACK TO THE FOREST TO SPEAK WITH THOSE CRITTERSAGAIN !" NO, NO, NO, NO... HE RAN OUT THE LIVING ROOM,TURNED OUT THE LIGHT AND WENT BACK TO THE FORESTTO SET EVERYTHING RIGHT ! ♪ Well,we're movin' on up ♪ ♪ Movin' on up ♪ to the East Side... AND WENT BACK TO THE FORESTTO SET EVERYTHING RIGHT ! ♪ ... in the sky ♪ mov-movin' onup... ♪ HE TRIED TO FORGET ALL ABOUT ITBY WATCHING T.V. BUT HIS CONSCIENCECAUGHT UP WITH HIM AND TO THE FORESTHE DID FLEE ! ♪ piece of the pie... HE THOUGHT HE COULD HIDE FROMHIS PROBLEMS, NOT TRUE ! HE KNEW IN HIS HEARTTHE THING HE HAD TO DO ! LEAVE ME ALONE ! HE KNEW THAT ONLY BY GOINGTO THE FOREST COULD HE-- OH, ALL RIGHT,ALL RIGHT ! GOD !

IT'S OUR OL' PAL,STANNIE ! OH BOY, STANNIE,YOU CAME JUST IN TIME ! YEAH, WE'VE GOTA BIG PROBLEM ! THE GREAT SATANHAS COMMANDED THAT WHENTHE ANTICHRIST IS BORN, WE MUST FIND A HUMAN HOST BODYTO TRANSFER IT INTO. THAT WAY IT CAN TAKE OVERTHE WHOLE WORLD ! THE WHOLE WORLD ! THE HUMAN MUST BENON-BAPTIZED AND HEATHENISTICAGAINST CHRIST ! WE FIGUREDYOU'D BE PERFECT ! YEA !YEA ! I'M NOT A HEATHEN ! I WAS BAPTIZEDAND MY FAMILY'S CHRISTIAN ! AWWW... !AWWW... ! BUT WE GOT TO HAVE A HUMANHOST BODY FOR THE ANTICHRIST. OH, DEAR, MAYBE WE WON'T HAVEA CRITTER CHRISTMAS AFTER ALL. NOW DON'T BE DOWN,YA'LL. STANNIE CAN HELP US FINDA NON-BAPTIZED HEATHEN HUMAN. WILL YA REALLY,STANNIE ? NO ! I'M NOT DOING YOUANY MORE FAVORS AND I'M NOT LETTING YOU GIVEBIRTH TO THE ANTICHRIST ! I CAME HERE TO PUTA STOP TO ALL THIS ! TO STOP US ? BUT GEE WIZ, STAN,IF YOU TRIED TO STOP US WE'D HAVE TO USE OUR EVILSATANIC POWERS ON YOU. RIGHT, WHATEVER. I'M TAKING DOWNTHE MANGER I BUILT. AGH...AGHGHH ! AHGHGH ! AAHGHGH ! AAHGHGH ! OH, BOY ! OUR SATANIC POWERSSURE DID THE TRICK ! OUR POWERS GET STRONGEREVERY DAY ! GET STRONGER EVERY DAY ! SORRY, STANNIE,BUT YOU SEE, NOTHIN' CAN STOP THE BIRTHOF THE ANTICHRIST... EXCEPT FORA MOUNTAIN LION. AND YOU GOTRID A HER ! YEA !YEA ! THE BOY SHOOK WITH ANGERHE BROKE A SWEAT AND FELT ILL ! WHEN HE REMEMBERED, THERE WERE THREE MOUNTAIN LIONCUBS STILL ALIVE ON THE HILL ! OH, YEAH.