Two Medieval Monks Invent Writing

MONK #2: i think youre ready to move on to something a little trickier this time

reading and writing

MONK #1: oh wow

MONK #2: the really important thing to remember about writing is that you dont use any words

ever

just blank pages in careful order

MONK #1: oh wow i had no idea

MONK #2: i know

thats what i’m here for haha

MONK #2: same goes for reading

MONK #1: right right

MONK #2: so be sure not to put any words inside the edges

just more edges

MONK #2: the other really important thing to remember

is that everyone uses two pens to write, but they still leave the pages blank

“two pens, no words,” thats what we call writing in the biz

the writing biz

MONK #1: are we sure about that though

MONK #2: what do you mean

MONK #1: i mean it sort of looks like a pen and maybe an ink scraper

to scrape ink away

so like if you were actually writing with the pen you would use the ink scraper to —

MONK #2: no

it kind of looks like that but it isn’t

just two pens

MONK #1: okay, okay

MONK #2: write that down so you’ll remember it

MONK #1: oka — wait a second

MONK #2: ahaha

almost had you there

just a little writing prank

to see if you were still paying attention

MONK #2: see

two pens

this one’s a little messed up because there are almost words, but you get the idea

MONK #2: a pen for each hand, and a twisted manimal for resting your feet on

do you think youre starting to get it now

MONK #1: maybe

i think so

sorry about the ink scraper thing before

MONK #2: dont worry about it

we all make mistakes

MONK #2: see he’s got a page with no words, and the other guy is copying out the no-words, and then in between there’s a whole book without words

so its actually kind of a cool tradition

MONK #1: would there ever maybe be a reason to put words in a book though

like as an exception or maybe a funny joke

MONK #2: no

not really ever, no

so not ever

MONK #1: oh

okay

MONK #2: you should probably just accept that books are blank

and they’re mostly for resting your hands on when your hands get tired

MONK #2: see what i mean

look at how well she’s listening

and how she’s taking dictation without writing anything down

i wish some of us could be a little more like the writer in this painting

MONK #1: okay so what if someone is dipping their pen in some ink

like they’re getting READY to write

but the page is blank

MONK #2: yes

yes definitely

now youre getting it

sometimes a guy just wants to have a wet pen

MONK #2: one other thing i forgot to mention is its fine to put words AROUND a book

just not in it

MONK #1: oh that makes sense

MONK #2: just a funny little writing tip

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