For a guy who keeps a ratings chart hanging in his resort, Donald Trump sure does have trouble getting his Nielsen numbers straight. The president is known to use TV viewership as a cudgel with which to whack his enemies on the head—or to attempt that tactic, at any rate. Unfortunately for the president, his information is not always right. For instance, take Trump’s most recent failed blow—when he tried to hit back at his fiercest late-night foe, Stephen Colbert.

The Late Show host attracted quite a lot of attention last week when he made a lewd joke about the president. Although Trump claims to have stopped watching programs that, in his words, “aren’t pleasant,” it appears that Colbert is still on his radar—and that Trump does not like what he’s hearing.

“You see a no-talent guy like Colbert,” Trump said over dinner this week, per a new interview with Time magazine. “There’s nothing funny about what he says. And what he says is filthy. And you have kids watching. And it only builds up my base. It only helps me, people like him. The guy was dying. By the way, they were going to take him off television, then he started attacking me and he started doing better. But his show was dying. I’ve done his show. … But when I did his show, which by the way was very highly rated. It was high—highest rating. The highest rating he’s ever had.”

Trump’s assessment is, as usual, a gold-plated cornucopia of inaccuracies, so let’s break them down one by one. First, since Late Show airs at 11:30 P.M., it’s hard to imagine many young children tuning in—unless their parents allow them access to YouTube, in which case Colbert’s rant might be the least of their worries. As for the rumors that CBS was going to yank Colbert from his time slot, both the network and Colbert’s rumored would-be replacement, James Corden, consistently said that rumor was totally untrue when it bubbled up in the spring of 2016. And finally, the most important note of all: the September 2015 episode on which Trump appeared as a guest star did not deliver The Late Show’s highest ratings. In fact, that episode was 2 million viewers shy of even meeting Late Show’s highest total viewership.

Colbert’s premiere as Late Show host attracted 6.6 million viewers, compared with Trump’s 4.6 million. (More important, Trump’s episode also attracted fewer viewers in the 18–49 demographic than the premiere did.) So at no point in Late Show history was Trump’s episode its highest rated—in any way, shape, or form. Then again, we are talking about the guy who kept saying that The Apprentice was the No. 1 show on television, even as it routinely lost in ratings to Mike and Molly. What can we say? Sad!