Trump ranting on Twitter that he didn't pay hookers to piss on his bed

Following last night's unverified spy-sourced report concerning Donald Trump's links to Russia and its security services' alleged surveillance of him paying to watch hookers piss on his bed, president-elect Donald Trump ("Peeotus") is getting even madder on Twitter than usual.

FAKE NEWS – A TOTAL POLITICAL WITCH HUNT! — Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) January 11, 2017

Russia just said the unverified report paid for by political opponents is "A COMPLETE AND TOTAL FABRICATION, UTTER NONSENSE." Very unfair! — Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) January 11, 2017

Russia has never tried to use leverage over me. I HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH RUSSIA – NO DEALS, NO LOANS, NO NOTHING! — Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) January 11, 2017

I win an election easily, a great "movement" is verified, and crooked opponents try to belittle our victory with FAKE NEWS. A sorry state! — Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) January 11, 2017

Intelligence agencies should never have allowed this fake news to "leak" into the public. One last shot at me.Are we living in Nazi Germany? — Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) January 11, 2017

The one about intelligence agencies controlling what the public gets to see is traditionally ominous Trump talk, but it's that boring one in the middle, where he claims to have had no deals in Russia, where we should look. Because Donald Trump is fibbing, at least according to Donald Trump.

room service? listen dickhead, you knew exactly what i meant when i requested a golden shower… pic.twitter.com/zB962kNCTf — forest fr1ends (@forest_fr1ends) January 11, 2017

Important Reminder: no photo, no problem.