Published February 18th 2013

The amazing alternatives you haven't considered

Spring always follows winter. Open the gate of your mind to other possibilities.

The sun awaits behind the clouds.

This article is dedicated to the one million or so people who take their own lives all over the planet; to those who are so weighed down with depression they are considering it now (every 40 seconds someone commits suicide); and to those who will think about it in the future.It's also dedicated to those I have personally known who have given up on this world  a popular Social Work lecturer, my journalist uncle, and a friend's brother. Might I add another group  those who don't actually jump the gap, as such, but live a half-life or engage in self-destructive behaviours within the bleak walls of depression.Bizarre as it may seem, what seems natural thinking to people who aren't afflicted with depression, seems out-right strange when one is staring through the lens of depression. The purpose of this article is to bring back to your attention things you may no longer be able to see beneath that cloud. People contemplating suicide, don't want to die. That's a myth that only those who have never travelled that road, subscribe to.There are many things far and wide that could be said on the subject of this confronting problem, but for this moment, I will explore one facet  some very unexpected and interesting alternatives to killing oneself you may not have considered.Anyone contemplating suicide is wrongly convinced they are a seer with the ability to see into the future. That future is plagued with all kinds of trouble, gloom and unhappiness. I hate to say this, but the reality is that you are not a seer and your crystal ball isn't working properly. In fact, it's completely stuffed. Did you predict the Japanese Tsunami? What about the winning lottery ticket last week? What makes you think you're suddenly an expert on the future now, huh?One of the greatest and most unexpected alternatives to suicide is the possibility of a happy life. Many people have survived hard times and suicide attempts to find themselves in a beautiful life years later.A little hope and faith will help guide you to that better future. Research shows that belief in a thing inevitably and unconsciously leads to changes in behaviour that make that thing more likely to happen.Years ago, some tourists who were staying at the hotel my boyfriend worked in, witnessed the suicide of a young male. It turned out the man who took his life had received news of a disappointing worker's compensation payment. If only he'd hung around to retrain into a field he may have liked better and potentially earnt more from. Instead he foresaw only a bleak future for himself.It's common for people suffering from suicidal thoughts to express the feeling they will 'never get over it'. WRONG again! Once again, you need to chuck that thought away.The world is full of proof that people do get over things. People survive divorces and fall in love again. So much for that lame claim they'd never love anyone else? Ha!Life is full of examples of adaptation. Although things might not change for you, it's more than likely that in time, you won't feel the same level of distress about it. Even people without limbs get used to it. The fact you no longer feel strongly about that past girlfriend or boyfriend in grade six (who?) or that you now laugh about those once insurmountable work problems, is proof that feelings are not set in concrete. They change. Bogged down in grief and loss you just can't remember that right now.Although, life seems painfully slow when one is depressed and going through hard times, the reality is that your time here is actually very brief. Take a look at the ocean and the stars? How old are they? Compared to them you're just a speck of time on a very old calendar. Before you know it your life will be over anyway, so what's the hurry? Check out the cemetery and the masses of people who've been and gone before you. Why not hang around and make the most of whatever life you have now. You'll be dead a hell of a long time. As far as I know it's irreversible.My mum once told me that life is full of ups and downs. Older people have been round the traps a lot longer and have a way of knowing things we don't, so sometimes it pays to listen. The truth is  nothing ever stays the same in life. There are good times and bad, great years in one's life as well as disasters. All you have to do is sit tight and wait and sure as Vegemite is black, things are going to change for you. Given the rate at which good fortunes can soon turn to bad and vice versa, it pays to find peace and harmony within. Seek out a monk to teach you. They seem good at achieving this.It could be that only your attitude changes to your suffering. Believe it or not there are wonderful insights that can often only be gained from great suffering. Perhaps those who have it all and appear to live the high life, are deluded about life and its' real meaning. Suffering seems to be an integral part of life. Paul Brunton , the very wise but little known writer of "Meditations for People in Crisis", wrote that "these black moments are intensely precious, for they may set your feet firmly on the higher path. Few realise this whilst all complain."Chances are any of the following are around the corner: you'll fall in love with the most amazing person, travel to Hawaii, find an awesome friend or helper, score a better job, win at the Paralympics, achieve a personal dream or heal from all the pain you are feeling. Why? Because miracles are just as real as disasters. Look around you and you'll see plenty of people doing fun, happy things. This could be YOU.Owen Lowery attempted suicide and not long after ended up fulfilling a dream to make a movie. Read more about him here Instead of ending it all, embrace some of the strategies that are statistically known to improve wellbeing. These include all of the above. Spend some time pursuing personal change, engage support through counsellors and meaningful relationships. Self-help books and material found online can be of great assistance. Exercise - it's been proven to be one of the best mood enhancers around, and is free. Above all, nurture yourself. It's time to look after you and heal from whatever afflictions of life are causing you harm and depression. Make changes to your life that will create a positive knock-on effect. Love yourself.