Remember when you were young, bratty and complaining about something stupid? Maybe your brother got to stay up later than you because he was older, maybe you were upset because nobody would watch you dive into the swimming pool or maybe you were even angry because your sister’s hot dog was cut into 5 pieces while yours was cut into only 4 pieces.

So, you unleashed the favorite complaint of small children, “That’s not fair!” Then, almost inevitably, some adult responded by saying, “Life’s not fair. Get used to it.”

Now, if you were denied that formative experience, maybe it would explain why you’re one of the losers who runs around crying about “white privilege.” I say that because whining about “white privilege” is nothing more than the liberal equivalent of saying, “Life is not fair.” That’s pretty appropriate since liberals like to think of themselves as sophisticated, but their thought processes are as simple as those of children.

Supposedly, white people have all these “privileges” which are so trivial they’re practically meaningless. Here are some very representative “white privileges” I actually took from a liberal article that scored high in the Google search rankings with my comments following.

1. I can if I wish arrange to be in the company of people of my race most of the time. (Wait, what?)

6. I can turn on the television or open to the front page of the paper and see people of my race widely represented. (Hooray, it’s all the Hillary Clinton, Bruce Jenner and Lena Dunham we can stand!)

26. I can easily buy posters, post-cards, picture books, greeting cards, dolls, toys and children's magazines featuring people of my race. (Wow, what a burden this must be.)

35. I can take a job with an affirmative action employer without having my co-workers on the job suspect that I got it because of my race. (Well, let’s stop discriminating against white people with Affirmative Action and no one will have to wonder about that.)

50. I will feel welcomed and "normal" in the usual walks of public life, institutional and social. (That sounds like a personal problem, not a race problem.)

Of course, it’s very easy to blow holes in this silliness.

For example, who’s more “privileged?” Eric Holder or the white guy working as a greeter at Wal-Mart? Who has more “privilege” in life, Sasha Obama or a white child of the same age whose father is a gardener? Who’s the more privileged one? Oprah Winfrey or one of the white housewives who watches her show? Spike Lee or a white guy who delivers his pizza? Al Sharpton or a white factory worker who’d go to jail if he didn’t pay his taxes for years?

This is where most people stop when they talk about “white privilege,” but there’s a more important point to be made. Not only is life not fair, it’s unfair for so many different reasons that it’s impossible to make it fair.

There’s no way to make life into a video game where every person starts at the exact same point, with the exact same resources.

For example, if you want to talk about privilege, what about “black privilege?” Barack Obama wouldn’t be President of the United States without it. So, what are some “black privileges?”

* How about being more likely to be hired for diversity purposes if you’re good?

* You’re less likely to be fired if you’re a terrible employee because businesses feel like they need a longer paperwork trail to fire a black guy.

* You can chalk up complaints made about you by white people to racism.

* Affirmative Action and race-based preferences mean you may get jobs or get into universities over more qualified applicants.

We could go on and on with this – and we could do this for just about every group you can imagine. For example, what about “female privilege?”

* Men are expected to pick up checks on dates.

* You’re more likely to graduate from college if you’re female.

* The homicide rate is much higher for men than women.

* You’re more likely to get the kids after a divorce.

Of course, you could just as easily do the same thing with men.

* You can have sex with a lot of different women without being labeled a slut.

* You don’t have to worry about being raped on a date.

* You’re more likely than a woman to be chosen as a leader.

* You don’t need to wear make-up to look your best.

On the flip side, we could just as easily come up with disadvantages for almost every group. For example, pretty much anyone who’s poor or middle class would rather be rich. That’s understandable. But, rich people have issues, too.

* They’re more likely to be audited by the IRS.

* They don’t always know if their friends or partners like them for themselves or for their money.

* People are always trying to talk them into loaning or giving them their money.

* Having plenty of money can demotivate people and make them lazy.

Of course, we can go even further than that. What about genetic gifts or luck?

* If Lebron James was 5' 8" instead of 6' 8," not only would he not be a great basketball player, he wouldn’t even be in the NBA.

* Talented though she may be, if Megyn Kelly were a 5 on a 10 scale instead of looking like a Greek goddess, she wouldn’t have a show on Fox News.

* If Albert Einstein didn't have a genius level IQ, he would have just been some eccentric guy with weird hair.

* If Bill Gates had been fascinated by trains instead of computers, chances are he’d be an executive at a railroad today instead of a billionaire who revolutionized computing.

If you want to go even further, if you’re at college, you’re privileged compared to the people who only have high school educations. Having two parents? That’s a much bigger factor than any racial or sexual difference. If you really want to get down to the nitty gritty, you can say EVERYONE living in America today is privileged. How does living here compare to being in, let’s say, Afghanistan? We also live in an incredible point in history where we have opportunities that would boggle the mind of previous generations. If you were born 1000 years ago, you’d probably be a subsistence farmer hoping to scratch a living out of the dirt for one more year because that’s what almost everybody did.

This is why it’s so silly to talk about “white privilege.” It requires you to block out a hundred other pluses and minuses you have in your life, narrowly focus on a so-insignificant-you-can-barely-see-it set of advantages you think someone else has, and then hold a little pity party for yourself.

It really is the adult equivalent of the four year old crying that he got “less” than his sister because her hot dog was cut into five pieces while his was cut into four. Children who do that just need to be educated. Adults who still think like little children instead of taking responsibility for their own lives are losers. So, don’t be a loser. Stop obsessing over how many hot dog pieces someone else has, take responsibility and do something great with your own life instead.