Hello all, I know that browsing through R/Trees a whole lot of you are ents in their teens who still live at home, it's alright, I am too, a senior with around 3+ years of toking a home. I've been caught a few time because of my own mistakes, man of them incredibly stupid now that I look back to it. I guess I would like to share my experience and help the new ents not be caught and generally be a smart toker a while at home.

I don't quite know where to start, but I guess with the basics of not being caught.

Never skip class to get high or buy weed,when you're absent your parents will find out about it unless yo go to extreme troubles to make sure they don't get the calls, but still, somebody is going to notice your absence.

Eye drops, eye drops, eye drops; the most obvious tells of a stoner are his eyes and the way he smells. Take care of your eyes first, I suggest rohto eyedrops. They burn like the devils urine, but they leave your eyes pure white and generally gets rid of the "glassy eye" effect. I'm using vizine, but they take a while to get into effect and they generally make your eye whites...murkier is almost the word. It'll do in a jiffy, but still.

Smoke with friends or alone when yo know you won't be called away for the next few hours. Trust me, it takes a while for you to become so accustomed to weed yo can pull off sober normally.

For your friends, a common misconception we've solved is that you don't need to do "stoner things" while high to enjoy, do the things you normally love to do sober, weed will just increase your feelings of whatever you're doing, not changing it.

When at home, keep your stash in a balls air tight jar, the glass one with a two part lid you screw on, it will keep your absolutely odorless.

On that note, every weed related item should fit in the jar at once. For a high school smoker, I would suggest a small glass pipe, a thing of rolling papers (they make flavored ones for a reason) a lighter (bic never fails, they're fucking sturdy) and your stash.

From here it gets a bit awry, it's all just scattered knowledge but:

For weed, the general pricing rule of thumb is around $15 a gram, $35-45 per 8th, $60-70 per 1/4 if your dealer is cool $80-$90 if he's not. These are the prices from my area (Reno-Tahoe) but check with forums and websites about your hometown or area, yo can type in your city name, weed prices and weed forums and you'll usually find a thread or two. Also webehigh.com is a great resource,a lot of cities listed.

if your weed is ever dry, leave an orange peel in the bag for a few minutes and yor weed will be sticky again.

Fuck febreeze, you can smell that odor from a mile away, it gives yo away just as much as the smoke smell will. air wicks are your new best friend(http://www.airwick.us/Freshmatic_Ultra_Automatic_Spray_Apple-Cinnamon-Medley.php) they oly leave a scent for a minute or two before the real chemicals eliminate the odors, absolutely no weed scent left.

A spliff is a must have, it's easy enough to make. Take a plastic soda bottle, prick the farthest half with a dozen or two sewin needles hole. Go to your laundry room and grab 5 or 6 dryer sheets and stuff them in there (you want the interior filled with the sheets) Once you have smoke in your lungs exhale through that and the dryer sheets scrub the smoke clean of the smell and you get a cloud of laundry smelling smoke.

Open candles in your room are a good touch too, there definitely manly smelling ones too, there's a huge bunch for sale cheap at walmart.

For hiding your stash, hide it somewhere difficult for you to even reach it, but somewhere where you can get there without attracting attention, otherwise your parents might stumble upon it accidentally. For me the vent on my floor has a lid that comes off easily, I stash it in there alon with my sploof.

*A note for the sploof, you can always replace the soda bottle with a toilet paper tube, but sometimes smoke leaks out of the body. but, it's still an option.

Now stginger you're saying, 'how to I purchase all this cannabis related paraphernalia?'

first, who the hell says paraphernalia anyways? second, my middle class white suburban rebel, find a local headshop downtown, somewhere you can a bus too or have a friend drive you to it. Dress the part, if you come off looking like someone who doesn't belong they wont help you out. Dress how a stoner would dress, act mature and have the cash you can usually get a sale.

Basic glass pipes can run you $10 if you want something basic, but they can head up to around $80 depending on the complexity, craftsmanship and design.

If you can afford it, as you've noticed, we love the MFLB and for good reason, we get some much more out of our weed and still have leftovers for edibles, you get a lot more vapor out of your bud and it's so much more healthier than drawing a clod of plant debre, because the heat is only hot enough to ignite and vaporize the THC, but not the plant matter.

It will pay for itself after buying 2 1/8ths or a quarter.

Speaking of which, always buy in bulk, it saves you so much more per gram than buying small quantities. There's a lot of math showing the difference in price, but look at it from a walmart perspective, the more you buy, the cheaper the individual item.

On to your social and home life. Keep on top of your grades and don't smoke too much. I learned this the hard way last year, where I just began smoking and buying so much that I would be high every day and in the summer almost 24/7. I could afford to, I rationalized. Not to be egotistical, but i'm a smart kid, i'm in an early college high school program, I attend high school of college campus, take three HS course and the rest are college, payed for in full. I passed with C's and B's and one A. It was horrible, I though I might not even have the GPA for attending the university after high School.

In the summer, my parent's were always working on multiple things. They're both entrepreneurs and both of them were balancing multiple jobs, fighting the banks on our refinanced mortgage and two businesses, multiple education courses and a few book. As you can imagine I had time to myself.

They caught me a few times over the summer, causing huge tension, accelerating into hem threatening to kick me out. It was horrible as I love my parents and want to pursue a future, but I still love weed for who it's made me as a person.

Ok, back to tips, I know my life is boring.

When at home try to smoke at night when yo wont be bothered.

Always roll or pack a pipe naked, the nudity is the first thing people will see when barging in, not the green and the pipe.

Reading is one of my favorite things to do high and alone. The stories almost become movies in my head.

When home alone and you have the munchies, any food is amazing, but the good food you cook and prepare from scratch is still the best.

I like foodgawker.com, they always have great and easy recipes.

Know the difference between indica and sativa. The short analogy would be sativa hits you in the head, indica gives you the body high and couch lock. Each have their own benefits and cons.

I guess the main thing is, sativa is best in the day, it keeps you awake and active while indica is best in the night, maybe for watching a movie or having a philosophic debate.

Do not let weed become the focal point of your life! I cannot stress this enough, yes weed is good, but it is not your life, it only enhances it. Have other hobbies and interests or the only the thing you have to fall back on for entertainment is weed. Don't you wont to prove the 80's just say no, pothead deadbeat stereotype wrong?

Some hobbies of mine that let me enjoy life with or without weed:

Reading, movies, local concerts, rock climbing, the gym, watching the top 250 imdb movies, r/trees, searching pandora and youtube for new music, fire dancing or poi, snowboarding, reading web comics, going through erowid posts, reading wikitravel about places ive never heard of, photography, cooking and tv shows on netflix (lost, madmen, downton abbey, greek, 30 rock)

Find something fun to do and being high doing it will be great, bt remember to still do it sober.

On driving high: just dont do it. No i'm sure you can drive fine and yes weed makes you slower ad not as dangerous on the road, but people, weed is fucking dangerous when the unexperienced are just starting out on the road. It slows down your perception, yes you can drive in a straight line at the speed limit, but if something different happens on the road like being cut off or having somebody in your blindspot, maybe tailgating you, it can be hard for you to react in time. from 16-21 our age group is the most likely to be killed on the road.

While on the road: Break one law at a time. If you just picked up a purchase, keep it in a backpack in the trunk, preferable in that airtight container you have.

If you get pulled over you have rights. If weed is in the car though and it smells pretty skunky in there, there're a few thing you can do. when the cop comes up to the window, only roll down the window enough to pass through your license and registration, so as he can't stick his head in the car and claim he could smell bud as a premise to search your car. If asked the step out of the vehicle, oblige, step out and lock your door behind you. He may only search your car if you let him, he has a warrant or he has a certain premise to search your car (it's hard to legally justify the third so it will generally never happen.)

Should you be arrested, plead the 5th motherfucker. Do not fucking speak before a lawyer is present, know your fucking rights. do not plead to any "lesser offense" to get off, even if your parents push you to take it, always talk it over with a lawyer. (don't quote me, but I believe you can have a state lawyer if you can't afford or get a lawyer, he can at least tell you the laws)

Dont have pieces in the car, they are legally defined as paraphernalia and carry harsher sentences then say papers.

*I figure I might as well do the sex ed strategy, preach abstinence first , then go on to birth control for the kids who are gonna do it anyways*

Another useful tip, have an unlicked envelope that is stamped and address to a friend or random address. Should you be pulled over, stick the bud in there and a the cop cannot legally open it as it is federal mail.

also, never buy more than you can eat.

Working out is amazing high, it's much easier to zone out and ignore the pain from weights and running, it keeps you in shape and fights against the muchies belly.

Selling passing on bud to trusted friends is one thing, but don't sell. Trust me you can make much more money much easier without the stress and much harder penalties (you can be expelled for selling, trust me)

On finding a good supplier, there are a few ways to go about it. Try meeting new people who you know smoke or look like they smoke. Smoke with them and try to get their connection and then their connection and so on until ou feel to uncomfortable going up the ladder (remember though, the higher up you go and the more you buy the cheap it is. (watch pinnaple express to get a vague understanding of the hierarchy)

Fucking remember hygiene. shower everyday, once you get into smoking there will be those lazy days where you just don't feel like it, fight it, people who don't shower just smell rank after a while. Dress like you don't smoke weed, whatever type of person you are (prep, jock, band nerd, whatever)

check out binural beats, you'll feel amazing

tumblr is the weed lovers paradise. Imagine r/trees on steroids, an endless scrolling page of whatever images you would ever want to see.

There's so many weed tumblrs its just mindboggling.

just because you smoke weed it doesn't make you hot shit. Don't brag or really mention it to anyone in school who isn't a smoking buddy, they really don't care. There really is a chasm between people who smoke weed and people who do. It's pretty rare to find someone inbetween.

focus on your grades. Do your homework first when you get home, it's amazing how much longer the day seems when you don't have to worry about doing something, plus you can reward yourself with weed and a great tv show after you're done.

Figure out what the fuck you want to do with your life. It's a bullshit answer that you don't know what you want to do, you have the internet, you can explore every venue of interest to you. Psychiatrist? read a few case studies and articles about it and see if it interests you. Maybe business or engineering if you did a lot of neighbor jobs or always loved building things. Do what you love and you'll find a way to live on that.

Good SAT scores are fucking beast, they get you into good colleges, gives you free money in scholarships and get's you into the high level courses (less money for remedial courses) and the coolest teachers always teach the highest classes.

Get a job to pay for your bud, it's not cool to always borrow or steal money. Try tutoring, raking leaves, being a bag boy, hell start up a business, most of you are fucking smart enough to do it and if you do it right you'll make major bank.

For other drugs, say no to hardcore chemicals

Molly is the hardest I would recommend, but even then i'm on the fence about it. Most often we'll try to get ecstasy, a pill that is usually mixed with a few stimulants to keep you dancing. It's not worth it now, but if you're dead set upon it, at least wait until senior year, these drugs do have an affect upon your mind, no matter what it is.

Acid and Shroom: Hallucinogens are a tricky matter, these drugs can be party drugs, but it's more of a real "trip" something that is just in a class of its own (well no duh, they're called hallucinogens stginger, smh) be careful, have a lot of time on your hands, and best with somebody you trust as a sitter.

For salvia. My perspective is dont do it. ever. fucking ever. this sent me on an insane ride that was disconcerting, strange and pretty damn scary. There was no euphoria, good body feeling or anything, it was horrible and really had a life altering impact upon me. It's the only drug i've tried that I have no desire to do again.

prepare some munchies before hand, they can be a bitch when you dont have anything or have to wait long.

So that's my piece, ive been writing this at a steady [6] thats down to about a [3] now. Love you all, good luck ents!