Poor Michael Avenatti. And I don’t just mean that figuratively, but literally — if court filings are correct, he was only worth $400,000 total before he took the Stormy Daniels case. And that was before you count the $8 million he owed various creditors, including the rather aggressive folks at the Internal Revenue Service.

While Avenatti is obviously going to be worth a great deal more after the Daniels case is over (if it ever is, given Avenatti’s penchant for dragging every minor detail of it out), a lot of of it is going to go to places he probably doesn’t want it to: the IRS, former business partners, alimony.

Alimony, you say? That’s right, Avenatti’s wife wants a divorce — provided, that is, that her estranged husband can even find the time to work one out while he participates in Daniels’ magical misery tour.

According to Fox News, Lisa Storie-Avenatti wants out of the marriage posthaste, and she’s taking her case to Fox News to try and pressure the otherwise-ubiquitous attorney to start showing up at divorce proceedings in the same way he shows up at CNN.

“I need to be divorced and if (Michael Avenatti) continues to paint the narrative, he can ignore our case!” Storie-Avenatti wrote in a text message sent from their Newport Beach, California abode.

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Storie-Avenatti was relatively scarce regarding details of “the narrative.” She also didn’t detail how Avenatti was ignoring the divorce case, although it’s not hard to fill in the blanks when you consider that Daniels’ lawyer and spokesman has spent so much time on the set of CNN advocating for his client that even Gloria Allred is probably advising him to slow his roll.

There’s not a whole lot known about the divorce case against Avenatti or his marriage Storie-Avenatti. The two married back in 2011. In late 2017, court papers show that she kicked him out of the house and changed the locks, presumably after she found out her husband was, well, Michael Avenatti.

According to Unicourt, Storie-Avenatti filed two motions to compel discovery — which are often used to force either the defendant or a third party to take action — back in early April, and two further hearings are scheduled in early June to consider another round of motions to compel discovery.

In spite of Avenatti’s well-documented debts and rather meager personal assets, Storie-Avenattti still stands to gain rather handsomely in divorce proceedings.

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As The New York Times reported Thursday, a television show featuring Avenatti and former White House communications director/vulgarian Anthony Scaramucci has already been pitched to several cable networks.

“The prominent television agent Jay Sures discussed with executives at CNN and MSNBC the concept of a program where the two men would square off, according to three people briefed on the issue.

“Both have become frequent cable network guests — Mr. Avenatti as one of Mr. Trump’s greatest antagonists, and Mr. Scaramucci as a loyalist to the president even after flaming out after less than two weeks at the White House,” The Times reported.

However, the proposed show has hit a snag because (muffled laughter) Avenatti said that “I have no interest in television right now.”

This either means that a) Avenatti thinks streaming may be the way to go or b) he’s a liar on a Bill Clinton-esque level. Of course, the two aren’t mutually exclusive.

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Either way, I doubt that he’s not going to cash in once this is over, particularly given his rate of asset burn, his problems with the fine folks at the IRS and other sundry creditors, and the looming issue of an alimony payment the size of Canada.

That’s really the worst thing about this latest development — the fact that it practically ensures that we’ll have Avenatti to kick around for a long time to come. Mind you, I don’t blame Lisa Storie-Avenattti; I don’t like spending time with Avenatti on my TV, much less in my house.

However, the prospect of seeing his visage on reality show after reality show in perpetuity so that he can pay off a divorce settlement is a profoundly dispiriting one.

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