A photoshopped expression of frustration made for me by a member of a Facebook Miata Club, upon having seen my car post-wreck.


A little over a year ago, I bought my first car with my own money. I took the path most traveled by Jalops, ending up with a nice 93 Miata. It was a 1.6 in Crystal white with a wood trimmed interior, and obviously a manual transmission. My introduction to the sports car world, and highly recommended as such. But really there’s not much I can tell you about the MX-5 that hasn’t been endlessly drilled into your head through YouTube proselytizing or some VBulletin powered circle jerk on the virtues of that flyweight precision machine.



So, instead, I’ll be mostly talking today about a car which sows disagreement between gearheads, a car loved by many and hated by many. A car that stepped away from the straight-ticket voting safety of classic design, and into a future computerized landscape for a future computerized gearbox. A car that I bought to replace my crashed Miata.

You’ve never seen anything like this before



Yes, I purchased a 1993 Corvette. The C4 generation is probably the least appreciated of all the generations of Corvette. The first two generations (and to some extent the first part of the 3rd) were claimed long ago by virtue of their looks, appreciable power, and a surplus of rose tinted glasses as a fashion accessory at the time. Even the later, emissions choked C3s retained lines almost as beautiful as the early years, and does the job of cruising in style quite well, even if the look, sound, name, and price weren’t backed up by anything more. But the C4 is the first one that performed like a jack of all trades, and the only fault in the aesthetics is that they aren’t as good as the other generations.




My Corvette outside a hotel in my town

A little history lesson first. When the government instituted the smog regulations, American car companies took it like a petulant child asked to do chores: rushing through with only the most basic compliance. This effort is symbolic of the inertia a large company like that can fall victim to, believing that the old ways will come back if you just ignore the new ones hard enough. Anyways, this led to half assed attempts to comply with the new regulations, items like the Cadillac V-8-6-4 and the Oldsmobile Diesel, both leaving their dark bloodstains on the carpet of automotive technology that has only recently started to fade. But by 1983 the manufacturers had grown more mature, and were ready to start actually trying again. GM decided to make a radical break in design with their new Corvette. While it may have always been known as “The American Sport’s Car”, for the first time it would be able to lay claim to that title truly, with a well rounded, exotic-fighting new design that was more than just straight line speed. Improvements were made in handling to compensate for the engines still struggling their way through emissions. It was given dual control arm suspension, which was easily exposed and worked on by opening the clamshell hood. Larger tires were added, which got wider as the car went through life, much like you and I will. Some models even got a cabin-adjustable suspension system, as seen on many modern cars. All these handling modifications made a difference, but the power didn’t return to an acceptable level of 300 until the introduction of the LT1 engine in 1992.

But the real question is how these 2 cars I’ve owned stack up against each other as a total ownership experience. At first, you might be confused as to my comparison, seeing as a comparing a Corvette and Miata makes as much sense as comparing an apple to a larger, juicier, faster, louder, more v8-ey, more luxurious orange. But I would tell you your fruit metaphor is cliche, and then inject price into the equation. For you see, anything that you buy for a Corvette is at least twice as much as a Miata, and I am being generous on that number. Also serious about it being everything. The Corvette has twice as many cylinders, so generally you have to buy twice as much of everything, plugs and wires, heads, headers, oil. The only thing you don’t have to buy two of is a camshaft. But don’t worry, even if you don’t have to buy twice as many parts as a Miata, you’ll still probably pay twice as much. The cheapest brake rotors you can get at your local parts store are still slotted. While struts don’t seem to be a bad deal at 95 dollars for Bilstein, you then realize it’s only a single instead of a pair, as it generally is for most cars.


The Miata during a private day at Springport Motor Speedway short track, with a friends Grand Prix GTP in the background.

I want to take a particular moment to focus on the audio systems, an oft overlooked every day aspect of a car. The Mazda Sensory Sound System in the Miata was a sharp looking good unit, which only had the drawback of skipping more than a truant Senior, a problem fixed with the proper application of a surgically modified sponge. Other than that, the Miata has terrible speaker layout, with the headrests being too far away from the door coaxials, which especially becomes a problem with treble screeching at highway speeds with the top down. But the company behind the Corvette’s sound engineering really should have known better. “Bose” is a four letter word, literally and figuratively. The pretentiously named “Gold” audio system was bragged to be so tuned to the Corvette’s interior that it would have to be changed if a different type of carpet fiber was used in the car, because if you’re gonna make claims that no one is seriously going to test you can just write about whatever. 22 years later, and we now know the engineers should have been less concerned with nylon and more concerned with the way their amplifiers are made. For it is certain that one day every C4 owner will be cruising around, probably listening to Steely Dan in some type of Hawaiian shirt with a few too many buttons open. Disaster will be imminent, with the only warning of impending doom being the slight smell of burning fish as the amplifiers cook themselves. Unfortunately, the scent will go unnoticed as the inevitably male driver returns from another meal at Hooters with a take away container filled with wings and the waitresses’ repressed loathing for all he represents. Suddenly, an amplifier will fail, and the soothing tones of Ricky Don’t Lose That Number will be augmented by a cacophony of hums, buzzes, crackles and pops that will emanate from the speaker at an unbelievably loud volume, causing him to crash ironically through the Drive Thru window of a Dairy Queen. I managed to avoid this fate, mostly because of the lack of Dairy Queen in my town, but both of my amplifiers have blown. And my CD player doesn’t work. (please inform me if you have old Steely Dan cassette tapes you don’t use)




But it’s not that big of a deal to replace a stereo, you might be thinking. And you’d generally be right, if not for the inexplicable factory wiring setup. Firstly, you can’t replace any of the factory speakers without completely rewiring the entire audio system due to some weird resistance Bose used. You’ll obviously need a new stereo to go with that, but the unit mounted in the dash of your Corvette is just a controller, not the real stereo, which is actually hidden behind the seats underneath the safe in the trunk, which generally contains a pint of liquor. This further complicates the wiring process, especially since you’re now drunk. You also may need to modify (read: break/dremel) the housing in the dashboard to fit your new two DIN. Finally, after all of that is in, you’ll need to change the carpets so the fibers match whatever your new speakers are.

Even maintenance is significantly more expensive, and required more often. The engine holds the same 5w-30 the Miata runs, but 5 quarts instead of a bit over 3. The transmission fluid is incredibly specific, only a GM brand, AMSOIL, or a specific high performance BMW oil, all of which are over 15 dollars a quart. GM and ZF (the manufacture of the transmission) disagree completely on change interval. ZF says 30k miles, GM doesn’t give you one because they know you won’t do it anyways. A similar approach is taken to the differential housing in the back, there’s a fill plug because there has to be, but no drain. Did GM used to think that oils didn’t shear? Anyways that’s annoying because you have to suck the old fluid out, and it tastes horrible. The tires are directional and staggered, larger in the back than the rear. Due to this, they cannot be rotated, reducing their overall life to something like 30000 miles, if you’re easy on them. They also cost $300 at the cheapest for the smaller axle up front. The upside is, whatever you buy you’ll be on good rubber relative to your cheaper all seasons.


I feel like I’m forgetting about one regular cost... Oh right.



All in, I think the Corvette is the more fun car that will ultimately lead to my financial, or perhaps fiery, demise. And therein lies the danger. I find the Corvette to be a slightly more enjoyable car on a daily basis. But it’s more destructive. As I’ve stated, the pricing is quite significant, but the worst thing is the power. When I had my Miata, I wasn’t always wanting for more power. Certainly, it was always in the back of my mind, to slap a turbo on the mad little roadster, but it wasn’t an obsessive thing as it is now. Now that I’ve had a real taste of straight line speed, I need more of it. The best comparison would be switching from a daily Tylenol to Dilaudid. You’re going to get addicted. The Corvette must be louder. The cam will be aggressive enough when it’s got more lift than a bro trucks and duration resembling a Senate filibuster. The supercharger will whine all it wants but I’ll still demand more power of it. Then I will know I have truly joined the pursuit of the Almighty Speed.





(Hope everyone enjoyed my first write up here, all judgement is appreciated)



