/b/ is the guy who tells the cripple ahead of him in line to hurry up./b/ is first to get to the window to see the car accident outside./b/ is the one who wrote your number on the mall's /b/ is a failing student who makes passes at his young, attractive English teacher./b/ is the guy loitering on Park Ave. that is always trying to sell you something./b/ is the one who handed his jizz-drenched clothes to Good Will./b/ is one who introduced you first to Goatse./b/ is a hot incest dream that you'll try to forget for days./b/ is the only one of your group of friends to be secure in his sexuality and say anything./b/ is the guy without ED who still likes trying Viagra./b/ is the best friend that tags along for your first date and cock-blocks throughout night. The decent girl you're trying to bag walks out on the date, /b/ laughs and takes you home when you're drunk, and you wake up to several hookers in your house who /b/ called for you./b/ is a friend that constantly asks you to try mutual masturbation with him./b/ is the guy who calls a suicide hotline to hit on the advisor/b/ is nuking the hard-drive next time someone knocks on his door./b/ is the one who left a used condom outside the schoolyard /b/ is the voice in your head that tells you that it doesn't matter if she's drunk./b/ is the friend who constantly talks about your mom's rack./b/ is the only one who understands what the hell you saying./b/ is someone who would pay a hooker to eat his ass, and only that./b/ is the uncle who has touched you several times./b/ is still recovering in the hospital, after trying something he saw in a hentai.