Not For Use In Space Travel

Now you can keep that wedding cake bagged for the rest of your life, like some character from a Charles Dickens novel!

Who's there? Oh, I see. It's you again, boy. Still wondering about this dusty old room? It's just the way it was the day HE left me standing in my wedding dress. And look over there. See that? That's my FoodSaver Vacuum Food Sealer & Starter Kit. I used it to save all the food just the way it was when HE left me standing by the buffet.

And look there! Look there! See those sealed up bags? That's all the champagne we were going to drink when HE left me standing- oh, you think it's cute to interrupt, boy? Maybe you won't think it's so cute when I dock your paycheck a shilling!

What do you mean "just a shilling"? A shilling can buy a boy like you a fine dinner and carriage fair home to your- wait, really? It's WHAT year? No. NO. The 21st Century?

Wow. I really should have gotten over this a while ago, huh? Say, you think all that sealed food is still good? It'd be a shame to just throw it out after... oof. Maybe let's not count up the years on this one, huh?

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