"Equius, open this damn door now!"

Vriska slammed her fist on the huge metal swinging apparatus a few more times before returning her arms to her side where they gripped each other tight. After another minute of silence she banged on the door again. She had been at this for almost four minutes already and impatience was her middle name.

She reached out with both hands this time to begin a staccato plea but just before her fists struck door she heard a clicking sound. She leapt back, recognizing the distant sound of the huge gears that operated the fortress-like opening. An egg shaped, mustached white head poked itself through the small gap that had opened.

"Edgar! So great to see you! Now get out of my way."

Vriska walked up to the butler lusus, who was named Aurthour, and tried to push him out of the way. Although she was taller than Equius's caretaker, her spaghetti limbs and frail form were nothing compared to the bulk of Aurthour. She ducked to the sides, trying to outfox the lusus, but all she got for her trouble was a proffered glass of milk.

"Look, Alfonz, we can do this the easy way or the hard way. That was the easy way. Now for the hard way."

The troll and the lusus stared each other down, or rather, Vriska glared at Aurthour whose face was incapable of expression outside of mild exasperation. After almost thirty seconds of the most intense one-sided staring contest Vriska had ever had, she dropped on to the ground and scuttled forward, forcing herself sideways through Aurthour's first pair of legs. She scraped at the hard ground around her, fighting for purchase.

"I should have killed you when I had the chance, fatlegs!"

"Please do not speak to Aurthour that way, Vriska."

Vriska jolted up at the new voice. She opened her mouth to respond, but she stopped when she realized her vision was now obscured by something warm and squishy. Experimentally she felt what she had just buried her face in. It was ovular, covered in nubs, and was soft and fluffy. It reminded her of one of her friend's plush toys. Only not shaped like a dragon.

"My, my, I didn't know you were such a connoisseur of lusus milk." That was Equius's voice again. For such a strong, refined caste, it was a bit quiet, like he was constantly trying to whisper. It had the gravel that was associated with his blood though, and it sneaked in whenever he was flustered. Which seemed like most of the time to Vriska.

Wait, lusus milk? Vriska dropped herself down enough to see what she had been wearing as a hat for the past minute. A gag escaped her as she realized that she had firmly buried her head into Aurthour's udder. "Equius, get your dumb butler out of here and leave me to die with some dignity."

Equius clicked his tongue twice and the lusus backed away from the entrance, freeing Vriska to lie on the ground, her face glued to the concrete of the entrance hall.

"And to who can I thank for providing you to me in person?" Equius was speaking slowly, choosing his words carefully. "Even if it was unannounced."

"Aw, Equius," Vriska righted herself, running her hands through her hair in an attempt to play off the last five minutes of extreme embarrassment, "Why would I need a reason to come visit my best neighbor in the whole local quadrant?"

Equius shook his head and waved his hand at his company, ushering her further inside. "It is not that you need a reason to visit, it is that I would STRONGly prefer if you had sent me a message first." The troll now turned to his butler, "Prepare the lower atrium, succor and refreshments."

"Why would you need warning? It's not like you ever have company." Vriska asked while she followed her neighbor troll deeper into his home. His lusus had cantered off, no doubt to make more of that terrible milk Equius so loved.

Vriska would never openly admit it, but she considered this troll one of her confidants. He was the closest living being that wasn't her guardian, and as such was almost instantly deified just by comparison alone. What she especially liked about Equius at this moment was that his home was practically a castle, and even if the troll himself was a bit weird, he knew how to design the hell out of a shadowy hallway.

"It is the principal of the thing, Vriska." Equius wasn't looking at her, and his pace quickened. Each time he walked through one of the rare shafts of slightly brighter darkness he shimmered like he had been rolled in a pile of glitter.

"Been working out?" Stated Vriska, with Equius it was always a strong guess. Gr8 guess, Vriska mentally corrected.

"In a manner of speaking."

The conversation halted when they arrived in the lower guest appreciation atrium. Vriska had spent many an afternoon lazing around in the higher guest appreciation atrium, which was filled almost entirely with strange robotic gizmos that could be broken with impunity, but she had never been inside the lower atrium.

"Who did your decorating, a blind girl? Ha!" Vriska laughed at her own joke. The room was painted a bright, happy pink and was filled with over stuffed plush furniture. This kind of furniture had fallen out of favor on Alternia many centuries ago, but it could still be recovered from the sand wastes with enough know-how and hutzpah. Everything was covered in leaf refreshment receptacles, although the upper class knew them as tea pots.

What wasn't covered in a tea pot motif, or was in fact an actual tea pot, was covered in a doily. To perfect the image, a large stuffed purrbeast was hung from the ceiling, its claws painted pink and a tea cozy hanging from its mouth.

Equius choose one of the larger chairs and relaxed into it. The room was much better lit and Vriska could confirm the sheen she had seen earlier was from the profuse sweat that the male troll produced while exercising, building robotics, fighting robotics, or thinking too hard about the caste system.

He indicated for Vriska to find a seat, there were certainly enough of them. "I have chosen these designs because I was told that I should present a more inviting front," said Equius.

Aurthour arrived shortly with more teapots, these filled with the clear, tasteless liquid that many in troll society had long ceased to care about. The butler poured three cups of the stuff, adding a splash of his milk in two of them, and poured the rest of the milk into the last. He brought one of the lesser-milked cups to Vriska, while taking the now almost entirely milk cup to Equius. Aurthour turned towards the stairs before looking at his charge.

Equius waved him down. The Lusus placed the final cup along with the rest of the refreshment upkeep and distribution apparatuses on a short table in the middle of the room and saw himself out. No doubt to do something equally as weird. Snarked Vriska to herself.

She tried a sip of the cup. She had had tea the last time she was a guest of Equius, and had found it agreeable. Her face turned pale as the stench hit her olfactory and the taste hit her tongue. Lusus milk was an acquired taste, usually acquired by lunatics or those without tongues. She placed the cup down on the saucer provided and waited in silence as Equius eagerly finished his drink, grabbed another bottle of milk from the table, and drank that as well.

"Training against your robots again?" Vriska broke the silence first, it was better than watching the display opposite her.

"Of course," Equius's words were muffled from behind a napkin he was patting his face down with, "I find it beneficial to maintain a dedicated regime if one is to remain STRONG." Equius then seemed to lose control of the napkin, letting it wander around his face and upper torso freely while he talked. "I noticed you had some trouble with my Lusus earlier, you have a promising physicality, but a malnourished upbringing."

"Hey, I had a perfectly fine upbringing!"

Equius angled his head at Vriska's remark. She couldn't see his eyes behind his cracked and tinted eye protectors, but his eyebrows had been raised.

"I mean, it's not like I had a personal trainer or anything," Vriska backtracked. He wasn't wrong, she had the body of a stick insect. Even still, she had been getting into Live Action Roleplaying recently, and that had helped her cardio, but she couldn't compete with some of the other, stronger trolls. That alone had stopped her from participating in FLARPing, a more dangerous, and often fatal, version of LARPing. It sounded like the absolute best.

"Okay, maybe I could stand to lift a w8 here or there." Vriska admitted. Equius leaned back in his chair, almost sliding out on the sweat-slicked fabric. The female troll continued, "I mean I'm gr8 as is, but I could be gr8er."

Equius stood up. The action was accompanied by a shleping sound from the chair that had become a swamp during his stay. "I can arrange that, Vriska. Follow me."

"What, now?"

"Yes, now."

"Couldn't it wait?"

"Actually now that you mention it, Aurthour where are you?" The second half of the sentence was shouted up the stairs. Within moments a white head popped around the corner, the mustache attached to its face still whipping about from the speed it had arrived. Equius went up to him and spoke in a hushed tone.

Vriska stood up as well. She knew that the main method Equius used to exercise was to beat robots of his own design until they were little piles of scrap metal. She had observed this happening only once, but it made her avoid her neighbor for a quarter of a sweep out of self-preservation. This was actually her first visit since then, and she could only guess at what had changed. Equius was always high strung, but he hadn't punched one hole in the wall since she was here. Maybe wrecking half of his home last time had finally calmed him down.

"Vriska," Equius called her from the stairs Authour had gone up, "I've made arrangements. Come."

Vriska let herself be led through twisting corridors and unadorned reception atriums to the upper workshops. The areas here seemed more lived-in, which meant it was strewn with mechanical debris, rubble, or shattered glass. Equius broke things just by being near them.

"Here," Equius finally stopped in a room with a poorly lit cage. The red glowing eyes of robots dotted the walls, and seemed to follow the troll as he unlocked the cage. He motioned Vriska in and locked it behind her.

"So," Vriska leaned against the chain links, trying to play off her nervousness from having just been locked in a cage that routinely hosts fights to the deaths, "What's the plan here?"

Equius had moved over to the wall and was pushing buttons on a panel. "I'm going to send in an easy robot set to non-lethal." A claxon began screaming from the ceiling, as the robots around the cage began to power up. "Just do as much damage to it as you can, and we'll figure out how to best improve you after you're finished."

"Ha ha, yeah, this is going to be easy." She had to admit, the screaming robots banging on the cage, the flashing strobe light, and the smoke billowing from the hole where the robot she was going to fight was now slowly rising from really set the mood. Equius really knew how to get a troll's blood flowing. Poor choice of wording, she thought as the claxon blared one last time and the robot she was facing activated.

It came at her without warning, launching itself head-long with a huge burst of speed from disguised rocket thrusters. Vriska threw herself to the ground as whirling blades sprung from the robot, passing just over her head. "EQUIUS," she shouted from the ground, "ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL ME?"

"Relax," Equius was smiling at her, he had found a seat on a large pile of broken parts, no doubt the equivalent of a throne of skulls in this arena. "The blades are too dull to leave more than a flesh wound."

"I LIKE MY FLESH UNWOUNDED!" The robot whirled overhead again, the AI driving it was too simple to aim down. Vriska shot herself up. She was angry now. Her chin was scraped, her elbows hurt, and the worst part of it all was that her pride was injured. She wouldn't be beaten by a tin can with a circlemower welded to its face.

She reached for her weapon, a replica of her ancestor's sword. Her hand met air. She grabbed again, only to remember that she had left it at home, she didn't think she would need it. "EQUIUS!"

"Yes, Vriska?" A hint of laughter had crept into Equius's voice.

"I need a sword!" She dodged around the attacking robot again. "Now preferably."

Equius rummaged through the pile below him, he found a curved bit of metal that had at one time been a pipe and waved it at Vriska through the interwoven chains. "Perhaps try this?"

Vriska ran towards him, snatching the blade from his hand as the robot rumbled past. She ran her fingers along it as she circled around again, exploiting the robot's turning circle. It wasn't sharp, but the tip had been broken jaggedly and was perfectly usable as a stabbing device. She spun around, spotting the robot coming in for another charge. She sidestepped and thrust the pipe down as hard as she could.

It pinged off the robot's armor, sending Vriska onto her back, and launching the pipe out of her grasp. "Equius, turn it off!"

Vriska lay on the ground as her friend flipped switches on the panel. The claxon died, the smoke drifted away, and the robots became quiet. Her opponent returned to the hole it had come from. Her breathing was ragged, and her body felt like it was on fire. She slammed her fist on the floor, hurting it too. She had lost. She hated losing.

Equius's smiling face appeared above her. He looked like a shark that had lost a fight with a brick. He grabbed her arm and pulled her to her feet. "Well done Vriska!"

"Yeah, I know, I, what?"

Equius clapped her on the back, sending her reeling across the room. "The first time I fought that robot I had to have Aurthour stitch up the front half of my body." He laughed, it was the only time his voice boomed, and it filled the room like water fills a sinking boat.

"So, I wasn't supposed to win?"

Equius walked over to where her stumble had left her, "If you had beaten Whirly you wouldn't need me to train you."

"Whirly?" Vriska was fine being dragged away from the cage, it meant she didn't have to move herself.

"The robot, Whirling Death Bot." Equius clarified, "He's pretty high on the aggressive chart, but not too intelligent."

"Oh."

"Aurthour!" Equius called. The white form of the lusus appeared with a steady clopping sound, "Prepare two baths, and dinner C."

Vriska pulled herself free from Equius's hold, and followed to the baths. Some ablution slime sounded wonderful right now. The cold squishiness would be absolutely perfect. She lagged behind the male troll, letting her mind wander to her home. She would have to get equipment installed in her place, it would be too difficult, or at least too embarrassing, to constantly have to borrow Equius's. Maybe she could get him to make her a sparring partner. What was she talking about, of course she could.

She came to a set of two corridors. Here the ground and walls changed from gray stone and concrete to clean white tiles. The tiles even climbed up the walls and covered the ceiling. She checked both of them for the other troll, but she'd lost where he'd gone. She could hear running liquid from both corridors, so maybe it wouldn't matter. She took a roll of the dice and went left.

The corridor quickly filled with white smoke, but it felt weird on Vriska's skin. It stuck to her and made her clothes wet, like she was getting sweatier. She could breathe it though, so it wasn't actually smoke. Her glasses fogged up, and she took them off. She wouldn't need them anyway for her bath. Bath. Baaaath. It was a weird word to her. Even though she was a higher class she preferred to use the words of the lesser castes, just because they made more sense. She would have normally called it an ablution trap, but there was no accounting for taste.

Without her glasses the world turned even foggier as she continued along the corridor. She could hear Equius some ways off, but his voice carried strangely and seemed to pierce through walls and doors without any change in tone or volume. He might have been singing, or mumbling to himself, but she thought he might have been doing impressions. There were two voices, one was definitely Equius, the other she couldn't make out at all, but it was higher and didn't carry.

The rush of liquid got louder as she walked, her clothes had to be peeled off with her claw like fingernails and she left them on a bench she stumbled into in the fog. She wouldn't need them for the ablution anyway. The corridor had widened out into a room lined with metal boxes painted a sickly green. She experimentally opened one to find a bag full of clothing, neatly folded and perfumed. The rest were similarly filled, but the clothes looked strange. They had far too many colors for normal troll attire, and looked like they had never been worn.

Probably another one of his stupid aesthetics. Vriska thought. Equius liked weird things, many of which Vriska didn't even try to understand. He'd no doubt gotten the idea for this room from something he found in the sand wastes. Or someone.

She turned a corner and the sound that had been accompanying her since she walked over the white tiles finally had a source. Clear liquid was being poured from silver pipes coming out of the ceiling. She recognized it was water and recoiled her hand from it, her fingers having been glanced by a splattering droplet. It was hot, far hotter than the seas that she was fascinated with, and far hotter than the ablution slime she was expecting.

Now that she had recovered from the shock it wasn't so bad. She'd been to the sea before, and while she preferred being on top of the water to in it, she had to admit that it wasn't terrible. She let herself slip into the falling water. It was nice and warm on her skin, but she still wished she had a place to sit down. The constant drizzle filled the room, but she followed the wall deeper in.

She felt herself recovering as she walked. Yes, she was heavily fatigued, and yes, she was bleeding from at least one orifice, but she could still hear Equius and the other voice coming from just down the corridor. She turned the corner and could just spy a grey blotch in the distance. Her vision was pretty bad so she called out to the master of the mansion.

"Equius!"

Equius yipped at her and the grey blob seemed to grow smaller, the sound of water hitting tile filled her ears, but she later swore that she could also hear the slap of wet feet. She herself quickly approached the grey blob, which slowly metamorphosed into a form that was basically Equius, if she squinted and kind of turned her head a little.

"Ah, Vriska, this is most lewd and inappropriate." He stuttered out, covering himself with his hands. His face was flushed blue with embarrassment. That isn't the only part that's flushed blue.

Although Equius had large hands, the tip of his bonebulge could be seen beneath them. Vriska had never seen someone else's in the flesh before. Her own had never held too much interest to her outside of the occasional solo session, but now that she had something to compare it to, she had to admit to having at least a passing interest in bulges. Not that I care, of course. She mentally interjected. It's just natural, like being hungry, or thirsty, or making poor choices in expressions.

It was only then that she realized she had just spent the last thirty second staring at Equius's bulge in complete silence. Just below the sound of the shower she heard a shlep that resonated throughout her own body. Her eyes snapped upwards as her face started tinging a blood blue. Her own bulge had slipped out of her nook and was wriggling happily in the warm water.

"Vriska, please return to the female baths." Equius had averted his gaze, his expression of supreme embarrassment. A series of thoughts ran through Vriska's mind. The first that her bulge was much smaller than Equius's. The second that he was technically touching himself right now. The third was that she had never been this close to another troll.

She wondered how many of these thoughts were also going through Equius's mind. "Equius?"

He grunted in reply, his eyes shut tight, his face turned away.

"We're friends, aren't we?" It was a gamble.

The question surprised Equius long enough for him to look towards her. His face somehow flushed more and he turned away again. "Well, yes Vriska, I would consider us positively acquainted associates."

"Then, you don't need to be so embarrassed."

"I," Equius looked back at Vriska. He had to admit at least to their familiarity. He let air escape through his nostrils as he considered the second half of his sentence. He let his hands drop away. "I'm just more comfortable with this reaction."

Double sixes. Equius's bulge rose up to join Vriska's. The two were almost identical in color, but Equius's was long and inflexible, while Vriska's was accompanied by seven smaller bulges near the base that all wriggled freely.

"Despite our familiarity," began Equius again, "I do not understand how that communicates into standing around naked admiring each other's bulges."

"I'm sure that flusheds do this kind of thing all the time." She hadn't meant to say that. She had meant to say friends again. Damn you troll Freud!

Equius's face scrunched up, although it always looked like that to Vriska, who was a head shorter than him. "Obviously flushed relationships, and maybe pales, but we are neither of those."

Vriska feigned surprise but allowed her gratefulness at an out into her voice, "Equius, of course we aren't flushed, I'm just saying that you need to relax more."

"I am perfectly relaxed." Equius stated without even a hint of irony.

Vriska opened her mouth to argue, but he wasn't entirely wrong. She hadn't seen him break even one thing since her visit, and he hadn't started shouting without provocation, in fact he was keeping his voice very level and quiet. Noticeably so, suspiciously so.

"Equius," Vriska had leveled her voice and narrowed her eyes, she took a half step forward without thinking, causing their bulges to bump, she didn't let it phase her. "Have you been seeing someone behind my back?"

Equius was practically a mess after the touch, but he also hadn't backed down. He's managed to look sweaty even when in the shower.

"I, I," Equius was stuttering, his eyes flipping back and forth between exits to the room and Vriska. "I have no idea what you are talking about."

Vriska reached out and grabbed his bulge with her hand. He gasped and froze up, like a purrbeast grabbed by the tail. It wriggled slightly, coating her hand in genetic material. It felt like her bulge had, but the movements were unexpected and the texture was different. Her own bulge responded favorably, the smaller tentacles increasing in motion and the main tentacle undulating rapidly. It felt gr8.

"Uhhh," Equius couldn't form words. His hands were covering his face, his entire body tense. Vriska experimentally moved her hand down his bulge to the base, the whole thing was now slick with material and her hand was stained deep blue. She grabbed the tip with her other hand and ran the two back and forth. His bulge was massive, and now fully excited was too hard to even wriggle. She ran her hands back down, bringing her arms together to trap it from both sides.

His bulge ran from her wrist to her elbow. A whimper of appreciation escaped Equius and Vriska smiled. Both her arms up to the crooks were slathered in his viscous material that refused to be washed away by the falling water. She stuck an arm out in front of her, admiring the blue that matched her own very well.

She'd heard that it was traditional for the female to lead sexual advances, but her lusus had been very unhelpful the one time she tried to talk to her about it. There was some good advice to be had, like entrapping the male so he had no other option, but she didn't think that biting her partner's head off after pailing was a good idea. She'd sought more help from some friends she'd recently met online, but they were just as ignorant as her. Still, a rumor spread around enough is basically a truth, and they had plenty of rumors to share.

"Would you mind?" Her voice almost faltered during it. It sounded wrong. When Equius didn't respond she thrust her hips forward so his bulge was brushing up against hers. Hers slithered around his, searching for purchase.

Equius whimpered again, his hands still stuck to his face.

"Hmph!" Vriska needed another tactic. "Take my bulge in your hand." Equius didn't respond. "Now!"

His arms shot down, although only one was needed to fully engulf Vriska's bulge. The feeling of someone else touching her was so strange that she jumped, causing it to escape and then rest on his palm, a lone blue worm in the much larger troll's care. His hands were rough, and the texture was gloriously abrasive on her writhing mass.

She felt that she would lose it right there, but he had survived her assault, and so she must survive his. She shot her arms out to grab onto his frame, but his material proved too slick and her arms shot out, sending her falling into him. She slammed her arms onto his back and finally found purchase by digging her claws in.

"Vriska?" Equius's voice came from somewhere above her.

"Mmm," Came the reply, muffled by her face being stuffed against his chest. His bulge had been pushed up by her sudden approach and ran along her midriff to rest directly below her head. The tip of it brushed against her chin with each breath.

"Vriska, are you, ah, feeling well enough to continue?" She didn't reply, his hands were still on her bulge, though she was doing all the work.

"I would understand if you did not wish to continue." Equius appended, "I myself was surprised by my apparent, ah, eagerness to participate." The two trolls stood in the shower, besides the occasional peep from Vriska, the only sound was the water hitting the tiles and their pressed bodies. This seemed to go on forever, and the lack of action was agony to the smaller troll. She had taken control before, perhaps again…?

Vriska pushed herself away, allowing enough space for her to turn her face fully to Equius, while still letting everything south of their navels gleefully intermingle. His face was not exactly pleasant this close, and he hadn't even taken off his glasses. Vriska squinted in the grey light, he was most definitely blushing, but not as badly as before. She wondered how she looked. The water had flattened her hair to her skin and one long piece had found its way down the center of her face, curling at the end to snake down her chin. She probably looked super hot.

"Am I the best you've ever had?" It was a challenge, of course. Equius probably hadn't ever even thought of another troll like this, never mind the actual physical act. Vriska thrust her hips a little, prompted by Equius's silence.

"I, er," Equius averted his face now, clearly flustered. "I was told that while this is a possible way for copulation, it did not seem the most appealing."

And who told you THAT? Vriska put on a smirk, while yes, she knew basically nothing about pailing herself, she would A. Never admit that, and B. Never believe that Equius of all trolls knew more than she did. "Well, if you had something in mind, feel free to speak up. Until. Then. Just. Let me enjoy. This." She punctuated the last words by thrusting her hips up closer to his, letting her more agile bonebulge slither around his nethers, mixing the material leaking from both into a froth of blue that traced the contours of his legs as it dripped down. It felt amazing, even better than his hand.

Vriska vowed to commit these sensations to memory to revisit late at night for many sweeps to come. The warm water on her back, the nameless sense of being close to another living being, the way his bulge started at her hips and ended tantalizingly close to her breasts, the strange heat that radiated from Equius, the supple patches behind his bulge that tantalized and fascinated her exploring member. With a flick the very tip of her bulge was inside him. It was almost unbearably warm there, but the pain turned to pleasure as she drove herself deeper, finding resistance that she gleefully pushed against, his inner walls parting to reveal glorious new textures to excite and further arouse her. This was pailing, and she could finally understand why the adults liked doing it so much. Here a spot of bumps seemed to slide back and forth, their soft nubs tickling her shaft. She had to have more, with her tip she had flicked a rough spot that had caused the walls to convulse, sending ripples of pressure over her member. If she could just get a bit better angle…

Her feet shot out from under her, her bulge schlepping out of its hidey hole with a spray of genetic material that landed on her chest and abdomen. Her arms shot out in time to prevent her head from acquiring another bump, but she was on the ground again, and not pailing. She tried to catch her breath and thoughts as what had felt like an eternity of bliss coalesced back into twenty seconds of awkward thrusting.

"Perhaps we should go someplace more appropriate," Equius said from above. Vriska levered herself up to answer but was caught by the magnificence of the sight. While at the previous vantage of face to face, Equius's bulge had been quite impressive, it was now above her, obscuring his face, and descending towards her like a messenger from the ancestors. Material and water sprayed off of it giving it an unalterian glow, and Vriska's whole body tightened as it tried to send all the material it possibly could to her genitals. Her mouth fell open and she knew. She knew she had no idea what to do next.

"Just pick me up and don't put my eye out with that thing." The bulge descended further until it was lying beside her, so tantalizing close to touching, then the body attached to the bulge lifted her up, and she was suddenly above it. While she currently couldn't imagine a world where she would object to being mere inches above this bulge, it was now swinging below her, propelled by its master's gait. Her own bulge had slackened in intensity, and was lying contentedly across her belly. As she looked at it the tip twitched slightly, affirming that it was merely resting, and could return to full usability at a moment's notice.

"I shall take you to the throne, and on it we shall properly finish our session." Equius seemed to walk for forever, occasionally he glanced down, or to the side. One time Vriska could swear he made a face and shook his head twice, but was back to as placid as ever when he noticed she was staring.

"Equius, Equius," She had to repeat the name to get his attention, "Since you're so proud of your pailing knowledge, why don't I quiz you? I'm sure there's something I know you don't, and you can learn a thing or two." It was quite possibly the worst ruse she had ever come up with, but her mind was more used to straight action, and it was still clouded from the previous encounter.

"I find that idea, acceptable." He paused. He thinks I'm trying to trick him, but he doesn't know how! Ha!

"Okay, let's start with an easy one." If Vriska had access to a graphite based record keeper and a piece of woven shred fabric she would have raised her pencil, "You mentioned a proper pailing earlier, what did you mean by that?"

"The Empress Approved Methods for Pailing, EAMP," He sounded like he was reciting from a script "Is an exhaustive text on troll biology and sexuality. It lists several methods to wring the most genetic material out of both partners in an orderly fashion and safely deposit it in a genetic receptacle for collection by Imperial Drones at a later date."

"Sounds… Clinical."

"The EAMP does not believe that trolls should derive pleasure from the act, and consist almost entirely of ways to improperly pail, rated on their lewdness, tendency to result in injury, and physical impossibility of the position."

"Sounds like an astonishing read."

"I have not read it."

"Oh, but you said-"

"I have been passed information and," here Equius coughed strangely, and turned his face away in a glare, "Extremely detailed illustrations from various sources who will go unnamed at this time."

"I've always believed," she cut in, "the vast majority of rules exist so that one may derive pleasure from their disobeying."

"I disagree," Equius grunted back, "We have arrived."

Vriska craned her neck around, and received a facefull of water for her troubles. Apparently she was still in the showers, but before her sat the strangest throne she had ever seen. The surface shown with some strange polish that caused the water to collect in drops and roll to the floor without pooling. A large drain sat below it, no doubt intentional. The strangest part of the whole thing was that it appeared to be a very strangely shaped sedan, not only raised off the floor by a good three feet, but with bumps and arm rests, and handles in places that only the dirtiest parts of her mind could think of a use for.

Equius laid her to sit in one alcove, and she discovered that the material had enough give to be comfortable, but more than enough strength to fight back when pushed. She now faced Equius again, but this time their hips were level, and her bulge perked up immediately.

"Question two, in this position, what act would you say would bring the most pleasure, and therefore be the least likely to be approved by the Empress?"

As an answer Equius brought his own bulge into hers, pushing the two up until they stood proud, hers snaking around his, searching for purchase.

"I do not recall the name of this maneuver, but the basic idea is for both partners to attempt to pleasure both bulges at the same time, using both hands. The winner is the one who can induce spasms and get at least one of their partner's horns into their mouth."

Winner? Vriska thought, No one told me pailing was competitive, now I HAVE to be good at it!

With an intensity belaying her fatigue, she shot both hands into the writhing mess, letting the mixing genetic material lubricate Equius's shaft and tip as she ran both hands up and down in opposite motions. Not to be outdone Equius's hands had found the base of her bulge and were intermingling with the small protrusions there. It felt like holding hands, but each of her mini-bulges was covered with pleasurable nerves that raked themselves along his calloused hands, finding the rough texture like scratching the best itch of your life. Her main bulge was not left out, and he had clamped it to his, and was running his hand back and forth, generating a handful of mixed material.

She let herself lean in close, a dangerous gambit, but it allowed her to bring her more dexterous and smooth forearms into play. She ran her whole arms back and forth in a twisting motion, his bulge was about the size of her arm from elbow to wrist anyway, and it was the only way to get total coverage. Equius's head shot back at the sensation, and the hand that had been filling with material shot out to cup one of her breasts. The slimy hand worked gently at first, almost unable to actually grasp anything. Vriska attributed this to how his hands were so big, and not the part where she simply had very little to grab on to.

With Equius fully distracted, Vriska brought her nails up along his stomache, raking the skin and causing him to almost bend double. She wrapped both palms around his tip and simply squeezed. With that he bent enough for Vriska to lean over and pop one of his horns into his mouth. He moved suddenly and her teeth raked along it, but she caught her lips on the sharp curve and quickly put her tongue to use. Trolls do not like having their horns touched at the best of times, and she could only imagine that having it almost bitten must have been exceedingly painful.

But Equius bucked again and again her teeth found purchase in the hard orange surface, this time however he escaped fully. She had won, she knew, and was gleefully awaiting her prize, whatever prize it was one got from being a champion pailer. Her question did not remain on her mind for long as a fountain of genetic material erupted from her partner's engorged tip, covering her chest, tits, and bulge. The sudden pleasure caused Vriska's hips to shoot forward unexepectedly, causing her to slip down. Her entrance was now flush to Equius's base and as she convulsed as her own tip added its sticky contribution to her chest the pressure on it felt amazing. Her back arched in one final gasp and she let herself sink into the pool of material that was flowing down her sides.

It had felt amazing. Her whole body felt like it was filled with a strange energy, and the slick but sticky mess that covered her felt like a congealing blanket. The sensations had reminded her of the first time she had learned what her purpose was in life. To rule yet rebel.

Equius leaned over her now, supporting himself with hands on the throne behind her. He panted heavily, but seemed to remember something. He brought one hand away from the throne long enough to run a finger through the mess that was Vriska's chest, scooping up a glob of mixed material. He popped it into his mouth and seemed to savor it for a moment. Vriska had known the troll to enjoy some strange concotions, but the mixed genetic material of two trolls was one of the strangest she had heard of.

Experimentally she leaned over, letting her long tongue lap up perhaps a little more than his finger. She brought it into her mouth and rolled the slime around. She innately recognized her own taste, a sour berry, even though she had never actually had the guts to put what came out of her bulge into her mouth before. Hidden within it those was the sharpness of sweat, no doubt hers, but also a salt of some kind. Finally Equius's could be identified as a mild, almost chalky taste.

"The first time is always the worst." Vriska looked back up at Equius, who had righted himself fully. "The taste I mean, you either get used to it, or you stop doing it."

A grin flickered back on to Vriska's visage as the steady shower of water started to wash away the proof of the deeds. "Are you implying that you are used to it by now?"

Equius visibly recoiled from the question, "Uh, ehm, that is not quite what I had in mind, I was simply, ah, simply providing comfort in a new experience." Yeah right. "To both of us!" He blurted.

"Equius, just turn off these jets and get me a towel." Her exhaustion had returned, but with it a lesson learned. She would worry why Equius was so good at pailing another day.

The return back through the vaulted halls of Equius's home was filled with silence, Vriska not really wanting to address the decisions made out of curiosity and blind determination. She didn't regret it, but the goodbye at the door with a promise to allow her to return to train again implied that the after-training session would not be repeated or discussed.

How wrong you are about that, thought Vriska.