like, first of all I personally don’t write things for white people any more. I’m not interested in ‘proving’ my humanity to anyone and, frankly, it makes no sense to me to be nice when someone’s being an asshole, even on accident. if a white person wants to follow and/or read about racism–fine, but don’t ever intrude on shit that’s not your place, and don’t derail or read intra-poc things. if a white person learns more about racism from me, cool.

so stamping your white approval is…meaningless, and honestly somewhat worrying. what am I doing wrong that makes white people like it so much? is it too nice, is it too white-sounding, overly formal, does it subtly shit on other people of color, is it classist, have I missed the real root of it, does it affirm whiteness in some way? being 'respectable’ is, like, a sign to me that I need to re-evaluate some shit.

and sometimes with 'anti-racist whites’ it turns into this disgusting bit of fetishization where they’re rubbing their nipples over our blood and tears and trauma and making us into these idols in their head, often while praising themselves for being the Good White Person in their heads.

(and before anyone accuses me of wanting white people to hate anti-racism stuff, what should be happening is a) white people can find particular anti-racism-for-white-people educational things to be effective, something that works their brain well, whatever b) it’s not comfortable to confront and repudiate/destroy/work against whiteness and it damn well shouldn’t be and c) it is perfectly possible to like something without being disgusting about it–but that requires one to understand, at a fundamental level, the significance and cost of the thing, and to understand the the full context might be beyond oneself, and that it comes from a human being)