Nobody likes to have cold legs, but that’s no excuse to go against nature and wrap your calves in toxic acrylics and genetically modified cotton. Not even if you’re hiding in a mud hovel and are otherwise nude. Here are five pairs of sustainable leg warmers that exclaim, “Poor Tom’s a-cold!”

1. Gisselle Leg Warmer, Aqua Mist (Solne, $39)

Keep the bottom halves of your legs dry and toasty with a pair of fashionable leg warmers from Solne. Crafted entirely from recycled sweaters, these hip and cozy leg warmers will let everyone know you may be a-cold, but you aren’t an unethical consumer!

2. Organic Cotton Leg Warmers (Maggie’s Organics, $14.50)

These fair trade, socially conscious leg warmers will keep your legs a little bit warmer than socks would, but not nearly as warm as pants. Which is good, because ultimately you’re really just trying to prove a point. Civilization is artificial. But your leg warmers are all natural!

3. Paired Arm or Leg Warmers, Solid Pomegranate (Solne, $12)

Add a splash of color to your bare and mud-caked body with these earth-friendly eco-cotton-blend arm/leg warmers in pomegranate. Whether you choose to roll them up from your ankle to just above your knee, or from your wrist up to your shoulder, your entire torso stays totally exposed to the elements. Tom’s still a-cold! O do de, do de, do de. 4. Organic Reversible Leg Warmers, Fuchsia (Texture Clothing, $48) Made from 52% hemp, these cozy leg warmers from Texture Clothing are undeniably stylish. Not to mention, they are REVERSIBLE! This is an important feature because it is cute, and because it will confuse your enemies.

5. Adult Bamboo Warm-up Leg Warmers (Gaynor Minden, $25.50)

These leg warmers are unbelievably soft and (BONUS!!!) they have stirrups, so they won’t fall off when you dance. They also won’t do anything to address the true source of your rapidly dropping core temperature — which is that you are naked and it is raining.