The Sharp-Ear Image

In hindsight, opening a store that sold nothing but Klipsch Image E1 Earbuds might have been a little too narrow a business plan.

I still think that, done right, Nothin' But Klipsch Image E1s would have been a can't-miss concept. But maybe I should have thought my strategy through a little more before I opened a 36,000-square foot retail store on Times Square. Buying the rights to the entire Beatles' catalogue for our commercials was probably not money well spent, especially since we didn't have enough money left to make any commercials. As for the Nothin' But Klipsch Image E1s Blimp, well, it was fun to fly over the Pets.com Bowl, but I guess the promotional effectiveness of airships has decreased significantly since the 1920s.

What can I say? I got carried away with my enthusiasm for these earbuds. Can you blame me? The comfy, noise-isolating oval ear tips, the customized 5.8mm moving-coil micro-speakers with controlled damping, the legacy of premium Klipsch sound... It just seemed like the only logical conclusion was to gamble my entire life savings and my credit rating on building a vast retail empire selling nothing but these earbuds.

Oh, well. You win some, you lose some. With what Woot gave me for my remaining stock, I was able to buy a forged birth certificate and driver's license and a rudimentary disguise, so I can vanish forever off the radar of my many creditors. Now, I'll just slip on this beard and these sunglasses and they'll never recogni- hey, these sunglasses are nice. I mean, like, REALLY nice. Wow. I bet people would really want to buy these...

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