Through the looking glass, and a wormhole, in the farthest reaches of a parallel universe, Donald Trump is not facing impeachment. Instead he is truth-teller, a healer of divisions and such a moral champion of African Americans they wonder if that Obama chap was a bit overrated.

To be in the East Room of the White House on Friday afternoon was to step into this alternative reality. More than 200 African American students and young professionals roared with delight and adulation, chanting “USA! USA!” and pointing camera phones, as Trump walked in and gave a typically jarring speech that veered off teleprompter.

In this reality, Trump can do no wrong. He is a standup comic whose lines always land. Millennials praise him for “saving America” and demand “four more years!” His pal Kanye West is a seer. The agents provocateurs of social media are venerated for their contrariness. The enemies are the liberals, the Democrats and their deep state cronies and the fake news media, all of which are to blame for everything from inner city crime to colluding to impeach.

And in this reality, even American history is different. “This is a place,” Trump said of the White House, “1799 it was built. 1799. It started off with number six. John Adams, president.”

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In fact the sixth president was John Quincy Adams. His father, John Adams, president No 2, was the first occupant of the White House, from 1800. Oddly, Trump made the same mistake at the same event last year.

Friday’s occasion was a young black leadership summit organised by the stridently pro-Trump organisation Turning Point USA. The president lavished praise on its leaders, in particular Candace Owens, a young African American woman and social media dynamo who denounces Democrats and the media as racist.

Trump claimed that he spotted her star power three or four years ago. “I saw this woman on television I said, ‘Man, I don’t want to mess with her. She’s tough. She’s tough.’ Now, I’m not allowed to say it, you know that.”

But go on. Just this once.

“I’m not allowed to say it any more, but she’s also beautiful,” Trump said, arms outstretched, palms open, as the room erupted in laughter. “It’s true. Under the #MeToo generation we’re not allowed to say it. So all of you young brilliant guys, never, ever call a woman beautiful, please.

“You’re not allowed to do it and I’ve kept doing it and I’ve never been told by that woman never to do it.”

Trump invited Owens to take the stage and she returned the compliment with flattery that would make the Ukrainian president envious. “You know, I was thinking,” she said, standing at the podium with the presidential seal, “every single president that comes into office, after two years they look so much older. He seems to be the only president that’s getting younger!”

Trump beamed and said, “That’s true!” The vice-president, Mike Pence, standing a short distance behind, smiled beatifically. Yet Owens wasn’t done. “He has somehow found the fountain of youth. I think he gets up out of bed – it’s the fight. He loves the fight, he really does. We are so blessed.

Facebook Twitter Pinterest Candace Owens, right, speaks at the White House on Friday. Photograph: Yuri Gripas/Reuters

“And listen, let me say this. The media. The audacity of them to think that they are going to impeach our president.”

There were boos and thumbs down signs from the attendees standing under the crystal chandeliers of the East Room. Shaking her head, Owens insisted: “No. It’s not happening, it’s absolutely not happening, not under our watch. We need to make sure we fight for this man, the one man who is standing up for black America, we are going to fight for, guys. We have to keep it going.”

More cheers and applause. Trump said: “Outstanding person … Do we have a choice? We have to fight, right?”

The president warned that the far left “wants to wreck, ruin and destroy our nation” and that Democrats are on a “craven quest for money and power and other things, I guess”. He encouraged the crowd to boo “Shifty” Adam Schiff, his chief tormentor in the impeachment inquiry, claiming: “He lies like a son of a gun. He’s been lying for three years.”

“Gun” was a wise choice of language given the presence of Pence and others who might have objected to more profane terms.

Trump – whose approval rating among black voters stands at 10% – praised himself for the lowest African American unemployment and poverty rates in history and for shepherding criminal justice reform. But that brought up a sore point and now the president went into full grievance mode.

Whereas Owens had kissed the ring with peerless sycophancy, the activist and broadcaster Van Jones had betrayed him, he recalled, after pleading for his help. On his TV show about two weeks ago, Van Jones thanked everyone but Trump for criminal justice reform.

He even, Trump recalled, thanked the Rev Al Sharpton! (“He used to love me. We used to go to fights together with Don King. Don King’s a friend of mine, Don King endorsed me.”)

So it was the president of the United States, keeper of the world’s biggest economy and deadliest nuclear arsenal, had been glued to cable news waiting for a host to give him a shout out. “I kept waiting for my name … I was a little embarrassed in front of my wife. I said, ‘He didn’t name me! I’m the one that did it!’ I called up Jared, I said, ‘What the hell is this?’”

To add insult to injury, Trump said, Van Jones told viewers: “We have to work 24 hours a day to defeat Donald Trump.”

The president claimed that Van Jones later called his son-in-law, Jared Kushner, to apologise. “But I don’t accept those apologies,” he said. Such slights to the Trump ego are neither forgotten nor forgiven.

Trump looked around the room. “Shall we get back on to script?” he asked.

The crowd shouted back: “No!”

There seems little chance of it happening.