Gather round, esteemed Martians. I understand that you are very upset, and beyond that, bewildered. A number of you have been asking me how it is that the United States has just elected as its incoming president, an individual who appears to hate Martians and who has incited virulent, shoot-to-kill anti-Martian hatred among his more extreme followers. He has also instigated hatred against people of all colours except white, and that includes black, brown, red, yellow and purple.

Facebook Twitter Pinterest Margaret Atwood. Photograph: Linda Nylind/The Guardian

America has long advertised itself to you, and to everyone on Planet Earth as well, as an open and free society that respects the rights of individuals of all origins and colours – including your own colour, which is green. This country fought a civil war to abolish slavery. It long styled itself as being against dictatorships, including communist dictatorships. It claimed to uphold religious freedom. It fought against fascism in the second world war. And now … this?

Has the new president-elect been aided in his campaign by Russia? If so, will he continue to be in contact with Russian operatives even after he is formally the president and thus privy to the secrets of his own intelligence service? Would that be a cause for an investigation by the FBI, or even the CIA? Should not such agencies get a look at his tax returns to see just how complex his ties with Russia actually are? On Mars, this would be a matter of national security. But what about here on Earth?

Will the incoming president give orders that the Statue of Liberty shall be painted white, to get rid of its currently ambiguous green shade?

This statue was long a beacon of hope for people suffering under tyrannies all over the world. Shall its message now be limited to one colour only? Or will the Statue of Liberty perhaps be blown up and replaced with a statue of a boot grinding into a Martian face, forever? (For your further study, Martians, this is a reference to a novel by George Orwell called Nineteen Eighty-Four.)

We do not know the answers to these questions. But they will unfold in time.

My respected Martian friends, the Americans – or many of them – remain a warm and optimistic people. They hope for the best. That may be their downfall. They are addicted to films, and prefer national mythologies with happy endings. The one I would propose for your further study at this time is called The Wizard of Oz.

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In this film, Dorothy, a girl from a poverty-stricken background, is blown by a tornado to a brave new world. In it there is a wizard who claims to have huge and magical powers but who turns out to be a fraud: he is really a carnival huckster. But he’s created a city called the Emerald City of Oz, in which everything appears green. This is an illusion: all the inhabitants wear green glasses, and therefore see what he wants them to see. He says he is doing this for their own good.

The wizard has no real magic powers, but there are some witches who do. Little Dorothy is sent to destroy the Wicked Witch of the West, which she does. Woman power against woman power, a reprise of the Salem Witch Trials, as you, smart Martians, will realise! The Americans have always been good at that, having begun as 17th-century Puritans, a sect which blamed women for everything, especially the Fall of Man. Given the choice between a dead woman and a dead zygote, they’ll opt for the dead woman six times out of ten. Orphanages will return. Children will be raped. It will be the good old days.

Facebook Twitter Pinterest Good luck, Dorothy. This may not turn out so well as in the movie. Photograph: SNAP / Rex Features

In the film, the wizard gets into a balloon and floats away, leaving Dorothy stranded. Boo-hoo, she says. How will I get back to Kansas, my normal life?

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Little Martians, the wizard is the president-elect. He has no magic powers, though he has several Hideous Henchmen. Dorothy – the voting public – put on the glasses of illusion, and in anticipation of a brave new world in which everyone will be the same colour, destroyed the person branded as the Wicked Witch, but who may actually have been Glinda the Good. Now Dorothy wants to get back to normal life, but there are no ruby slippers. And the wizard will shortly be in Airland, looking at himself in the mirror, having put Oz into the charge of several his several Hideous Henchmen. They’ll begin by slaughtering the Munchkins, and it won’t stop there.

Good luck, Dorothy. This may not turn out so well as in the movie.

More practically: what is the false wizard likely to do? Will he really try to put Hillary Clinton in jail? That would be interesting, as La Clinton would instantly become a martyr to rival Joan of Arc. Will he uphold the constitution? Not if he can either read it or help it. Will women, blacks, Mexicans and Martians be viewed as target practice by the Klans-for-Trump? They will. Will China take world leadership on climate change as the oceans die, the forests burn, the waters rise, and the US abandons its leadership role and any efforts to keep the human race from frying, choking, starving and being polluted to death? Yes, China will. That will be the New World Order. You won’t like it much.

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But one thing is certain: whatever bad things happen in the next few years, the Republicans will own them. If the US loses its top position and sinks beneath the waves of history, cheered on by its enemies, it will know who it has to thank.

Dorothy, we wish you the best of luck. If we had the Ruby Slippers, we’d summon the Flying Monkeys to bring them to you. But alas, we don’t.

As for you, my Martian friends of an identifiable colour, guard yourselves well. Hope that some of the warm-hearted Americans will protect you, if they aren’t too fearful and filled with despair. Maybe they will even smuggle you up to Canada, where a nice hot cup of tea awaits.

And who knows? All may yet be well, in the long run. Less than half of America’s voters chose the false wizard, which is one consolation at least.