Which was all well and good, but it wasn't always the advice our heterosexual peers received. They had no need to "hide" anything, when they are to get engaged, married or have children it gets to be an article in the school newsletter, complete with smiling photos and well wishes. For us, it's better left unsaid. One girl returned from her placement in a private all girls school a nervous wreck. During a weekend at the theatre with her girlfriend a student had spotted them holding hands in public. The following week the news had spread through the school like wildfire, climaxing in a hostile exchange in the middle of the classroom from one of the students. The only support given to her by the supervising teacher was a scolding about keeping her private life to herself and out of the school. I didn't see that girl again, whether she ended up graduating I'm not sure, but the experience had scarred her and it set the fear in all of us. It was one of my very first days as I was sitting nervously at my desk that one of the teachers beside me in my cubicle started making friends. We were talking about what sort of music I liked and my answers were a dead giveaway.



"Are you gay?" He laughed.

I hesitated for a moment, I couldn't lie.

"Yes" I said as calmly as I could.

"Really?" He laughed again, nervously.

"Yes, really..."



I let it hang there for a moment, neither of us really knew what to say. I think I had just caught him off guard, but he smiled warmly and we continued on. It was awkward, but he ended up being one of my favourite colleagues. The general reception from all the teachers was great for the most part. As with any workplace there were people you bond with and those who you share space with, but never anyone who I had a problem with. My sexuality wasn't on display as such, but it was relatively "known" to most of the teaching staff I assumed. Over the course of two years I sat three placements in that school and had a great time, had some wonderful and challenging teaching experiences, and made some excellent friends. My experiences in the state system had been mixed, nothing to do with my sexuality, just archaic institutions, burnt out teachers and a system bursting at the seams with paperwork and bureaucracy. It wasn't the best system to work in, certainly not the one for me, so I opted to stick with the private sector. One of the first contracts I was offered was back at the very same school, contacted by my supervising teacher who was so impressed with my work he asked that I cover his long service leave contract. After passing my interview I was granted full temporary teacher status within the school. Welcomed with open arms by my colleagues, the first few weeks were great.

However, over the years I had built up a small portfolio of community media and GLBTIQ activism work and it didn't take the kids long to find out thanks to the internet. Being a small all boys catholic school it was the talk of the school. The boys reacted the way all boys do at 'scandalous' information, gossiping, joking and pranks, not a great many efforts were made to diffuse the situation.

It wasn't the easiest discussion to have with senior management at the school, all staunchly Catholic men who you could see shifting uncomfortably in their seats, fidgeting with their collars and avoiding eye contact. They said what they had to and we moved on. It was my teaching colleagues who took the important steps in helping settle things down and help the boys move on to their next scandal. Overall, it was a relatively dull affair that lasted all of a week or two.

I never discussed it with the students, we all moved on. I had met very pleased parents at awards night, made friends with colleagues and seen my students achieve some great work in my classes, so I felt as though my time there had been a success. The school administration seemed to feel somewhat differently.

At the conclusion of my contract the ties were severed. My partner and myself who had recently become foster carers applied to have our son enrolled with the school, a process we were told was almost a guarantee for any current or past teacher. After our interview we were told acceptance/rejection letters would arrive in May.

We received ours just three weeks later in March, rejected.



Meanwhile. I had sent numerous emails and made many phone calls with differing contacts at the school in order to arrange further work as a substitute teacher, all communication went unreturned. It was implicitly clear this door had been shut in my face and this place was no longer welcoming to me based on my sexuality. The naysayers would easily say there is no proof, but when you live an experience like that you don't need proof. That experience alone has deterred me from teaching further and I'm not alone - other teachers have had worse experiences and there are many who fight to keep themselves closeted while at work for fear of losing their jobs. The travesty of this situation is that if I wanted to take this to court, if I wanted to stand up and say "They did not invite me back because I am gay", the law would say "Yes and that is their right".



When we have a law that pushes teachers into the closet, that divides people and tells them they must hide parts of who they are in order to retain a job, then we have a very serious problem on our hands. That is not a system that is just and right, that is a system that persecutes and divides and what message does that send to our teachers and our children? "1 John 4:11: Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another." Michael James is a QTV Host and serves on the Brisbane Pride Festival Committee.