HOLY CROW MY SECRET SANTA IS AMAZEBALLS!!! I wish I could express the SHEER EXCITEMENT when my package arrived at work today. I SWEAR TO YOU I ALMOST BURNED THE PLACE TO THE GROUND I was so ready to tear into it!

I told my secret santa that I'm a used to be chubster that has recently turned the beat around and now spend every morning at 5am pumping the heavy iron at my local gym. He hooked me up with some kick ass workout shorts, a smokin hot workout shirt that going to make HEADS TURN MY FRIENDS...a running head band, a foam roller so I can keep my new muscles lactic acid free, and a kick ass protein shake mixer upper bottle. Not a little one either. Oh yeah..its a tallboy. GOTTA GET MY PROTEIN!!! All of came in a kick ass adidas backpack that will be the envy of all that see it.

So listen..Mr. Secret Santa. You. You are my people. I can't thank you enough for all the gifts you sent me, and honestly..my favourite part of the whole damn box o fun was your letter. I LOVE DICK'S...sporting goods..and nothing will be returned, exchanged, or anything less that lovingly sweated in. (Things just got awkward, sorry).

And in all seriousness, the time you took to pick out all this awesomeness is truly touching. I may or may not be weeping softly into my protein drink.

NOW LETS TURN UP THE METAL TUNES AND GO PUMP SOME F'ING IRON!!