These are the beautifully crafted rings made and sold by Secret Wood. Personally, in my life there's no such thing as secret wood, only very obvious boners. The rings are made from different types of exotic wood and colored resins, and the geological features that appear in the rings are all created by the shapes of the splintered wood inside. Prices range from $90 - $180 depending on the style and materials used. Obviously, I still can't afford those kinds of prices so I tried making one of my own and now I've got painful splinters. "Please tell me it wasn't a penis ring." Hahaha, of course not I'm not that stupid yes I am please help it feels like I've got angry ants in my pants again. Apparently they get pissed if you make them leave their farm.

Keep going for a bunch more examples.

Thanks to Stephanie B, who agrees the most beautiful rings are heard from church bell towers at dusk.