Grieving families could be forced to seek council permission if they want to scatter their loved ones' ashes on the Kapiti Coast.

A draft bylaw up for approval by Kapiti Coast District Council next month proposes to ban people from scattering ashes on beaches, rivers and parks.

If it is approved, people would need written permission, and would be restricted to emptying urns in specific garden beds inside cemeteries.

SUPPLIED Katrina Shanks, chief executive of the Funeral Directors Association, has labelled the idea "bonkers". "Who's going to police this? Is there someone hiding behind a tree waiting for you to scatter ashes on a beach?"

The council says it wants to educate people, rather than creating "ashes police", but the Funeral Directors Association has already labelled the plan as "bonkers".

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"You shouldn't regulate anything unless there's harm being done," association chief executive Katrina Shanks said. "I can nearly guarantee there's no harm being done."

She said people who were grieving should be able to scatter ashes in places that were "very special" to them.

"Who's going to police this? Is there someone hiding behind a tree waiting for you to scatter ashes on a beach?"

Changes to funeral process can be a thorny issue, as Wellington City Council discovered earlier this year when it proposed charging a $50 fee to people were late to funerals. It hastily backed down after a community backlash.

Kapiti's proposal is part of a draft cemeteries bylaw set for approval in September. The draft went out for public consultation in June, but garnered no submissions.

NO "ASHES POLICE"

Council open spaces manager Nico Crous said its approach would be "more educational than regulatory".

"We're not going to put ashes police out there. That is not going to happen."

But other residents did not want ashes near the likes of sports grounds, picnic tables, and particularly near sacred Maori sites, he said.

"It's all very well for the family to say, 'That was granddad's request'. It might have been granddad's request, but what about the rest of the public who are now emotionally influenced by what's happened there?

​"If somebody contacted council, we'd say, 'Give us a call, or come in explain to us what you want to do, and give us the opportunity to guide you.'

"There would be no cost, we just want to assist you to do it and ensure it doesn't cause offence to anybody else in our community."

Another problem was that ashes were not always put through a "cremulator", which grinds up the small bone fragments left after cremation.

In one case in Marlborough, where Crous worked previously, staff discovered human bone fragments scattered in a public garden, he said.

TAPU FOR MAORI

Kapiti Coast Funeral Home managing director Andrew Malcolm said the move was probably a safeguard for dealing with future problems.

He had heard of people scattering ashes out of the windows of trams running through Queen Elizabeth Park. "On a windy day, it goes in everyone's hair."

Council kaumatua Don Te Maipi said that, from his perspective, the scattering of ashes was tapu.

"Where we get our crays from, our food from, imagine people throwing ashes all over that."

HOW MANY CREMATING?

Kapiti Coast Funeral Home managing director Andrew Malcolm said cremation rates had remained steady at about 80 per cent for 24 years he had been a funeral director.

It was the general preference of "white, middle-class society" , which made up the majority of Kapiti's population.

KAPITI'S PROPOSAL

"Ashes may not be deposited in a public place without prior written approval by the council. This includes the scattering of human ashes in any cemetery, reserve, river or beach." - Draft Cemeteries Bylaw, 2016.

ASHES TO ASHES: THE RULES

Wellington

The only approved public place where ashes can be scattered or interred is Willowbank Park, a small reserve in the northern suburb of Tawa. However, through Wellington City Council, the Wellington Tenths Trust and Te Runanga o Toa Rangatira you can ask to have a public site considered for scattering or interment.

Porirua

There is an area of native bush at Whenua Tapu Cemetery designated for the purpose. Reserves may be used to accommodate ashes in managed circumstances.

Upper Hutt

There are no set rules around ash-scattering, but there is an area at Akatarawa Cemetery where ashes can be scattered at will.

Lower Hutt

Due to the wishes of tangata whenua, ash-scattering is not allowed in any cemetery or council facility, including garden areas, lawns and streams.