Speechless & angry at venomous response, says young mother

KOLKATA: A young mother , who happened to be at South City Mall when she needed to breastfeed her child this Sunday, was denied a private space by storekeepers and security staff despite repeated pleas before an apparel storekeeper came to her help and allowed her to use the cramped trial room.Abhilasha DasAdhikari wrote a short review on the feedback section of the mall’s Facebook page two days later, recounting her ordeal, but the reply she got left her stumped. The post from “South City Mall” told her that she should plan her baby’s feeding arrangements properly and that she should “do her home chores at home and not at a mall”.The FB posts — the young mom’s plaint and the response from one of the city’s biggest malls — have gone viral, bringing into focus one of the most urgent needs that often go ignored at public spaces in India.The posts have also triggered a public outcry that has forced mall officials on the defensive. An attempt to issue an “unconditional apology” was met with such anger that the mall management had to remove the feedback option from its page.South City Mall vice-president Manmohan Bagri told TOI that even the management was shocked at the reply posted by a young executive of an agency that was handling the mall’s Facebook page. “The rude and aggressive reply was posted without our consent. We have removed the agency,” he said, adding that the mall did have a “changing room” on its first floor and those on other floors were under renovation.But the audiologist, who needed a room to nurse her seven-month-old daughter on Sunday evening, said she had a very different experience. Not only could she not locate the “changing room” near the washrooms on the first and second floors, janitors posted near the ladies’ washroom said there was no such facility and asked her to use the women’s toilet to feed her daughter.“I entered the washroom but it was smelly and I could not feed her there. My baby was hungry and crying by then and, in desperation, I tried to use a corridor bench but it was extremely uncomfortable. I then approached a few storekeepers but they refused. I approached a multiplex there twice, pleading with security the first time and its officials thereafter, but they would not help. Others on the scene were moved by my wailing baby but the mall staff were unmoved. It was then that I spotted an apparel store that did not have any customers at the time and approached the staff. They allowed me to use the trial room,” Abhilasha recounted.She returned to her Behala residence and narrated the ordeal to husband Arup, also an audiologist, who was left shocked at the lack of a facility as basic as a nursing room in a mall that opened after renovation barely eight months ago.Monday was spent preparing for his departure for a medical conference to Daman. So, around 3.30pm on Tuesday, Abhilasha went to South City Mall’s Facebook page and posted a review: “There is no place to breast feed... on top of it, your staff asked me to feed in the toilet... disgusting place....”Six-and-a half-hours later, Abhilasha received this response from South City Mall: “Funny you found to be an issue because breast-feeding is not allowed on the floor for a number of reasons. In case of any emergency, we can make arrangements to help someone but certainly this big place that we have is meant for shopping so with all due respect madam please make sure you do your home chores at your home and not in the mall, at least plan it beforehand. It’s not like your baby needs to be breast-fed at any moment so you need arrangements to be made for you at any public area to breast-feed your child anywhere you wish to? We cannot compromise the privacy of other people in public places can we?”“I was left speechless and angry and then I began crying. I merely posted a review and there was this venomous counter. I have not read anything so disgusting ever,” she told TOI on Wednesday.The outrageous comments drew sharp ripostes from women not only in Kolkata but other cities as well. Sweta S Pal from Hyderabad wrote: “Unprofessional, rude, insensitive and pathetic staff ! How can you ask a mother to feed her baby in a toilet? Can you eat your food there? On top of that, your arrogant staff comments that the lady should complete her ‘household chores’ at home!”Rong Tuli, a young woman who loves to hang around in malls, wrote: “Yeah wanted to visit. But since you started mocking mothers, don’t think ladies should visit there again.” Reshmi Nilofer wrote: “If I were you, I’d apologise to that mother and try to improvise or make a feeding room available in my mall. Shame on you!”The avalanche of criticism prompted South City’s Bagri to claim that he had posted an unconditional apology on the mall’s web page, which he forwarded to TOI but could not be viewed on the website.It read: “We at South City deeply apologise unconditionally for the reply to your feedback. We are deeply saddened by the reply made by our account handler. South City Mall has baby-feeding rooms on all floors... and we have got them operational and... have highlighted the (matter) internally after your feedback and inconvenience caused. In the meantime you got the revert from our agent, for which we apologise once again. We respect the child and mother’s privacy and necessity.”The development also spurred the mall authorities into action and, by Wednesday evening, the changing room on the mall’s first floor was operational and work was under way full-steam on the second floor as well. A mall janitor said there had been a flurry of activity since Wednesday morning to get the rooms ready and running.The facility may help all nursing mothers in future but Abhilasha is sure she will not visit the mall again.