Patrick Fraser

Your problems never cease. They just change.

I tell the kids that they're not going to be adults until they're twenty-eight, because they're playing a boys' game. It delays their maturation.

There's so much input. It's hard for them to focus. I use the illustration of them going down the highway at eighty miles an hour, eating McDonald's, with their iPod in their head and the sound turned up so loud that they can't hear anything, and then they drop something on their lap, a gob of mustard or ketchup. And they look down, and when they look back up, there are all these red lights ahead of them -- that's how their life is going on, it's just so much activity going on at one time.

My father was the superintendent of the churches in the state of Montana. He was content in his beliefs. He befit the term "true Christian." He would turn the other cheek. He was truly a man of peace. I think that my carriage and my demeanor are very much what the image of my father was like.

When she preached, my mother was all fire and brimstone. She was a seeker -- intellectually she sought greater truths. And she was a competitor -- she was the captain of her basketball team.

There was a time in my life -- I spent fifteen years in my career with New York and New Jersey -- where I always felt if I didn't get those three or four months in Montana to camp, to be on the land, to actually live on the ground and be connected with the ground, then I wasn't really connecting myself with my roots, with that pioneer spirit that is so deeply a part of me.

For us tall people, the whole key is that your hips and your knees should form a right angle when you sit down. That's where backs and hips get to be problems for big guys.

I just went on a commercial airline for the first time in two years. I couldn't believe the first-class seats were so tight for a person my size. I hit my head twice on the exit signs near the bins.

It's harrowing to be an athlete and to think that you need an artificial joint, and then to think what it's going to do to your life. But diminishing returns set in. You can't play tennis or go hiking. Swimming and biking were my only activities -- I couldn't even run anymore. And then, a few years ago, the pain started. It got to a certain level where I couldn't deal with it any longer, especially the arthritic pain in the hips -- it just became overwhelming. It got to the point where I couldn't sleep.

Some people choose to interpret this current period in my life as a trial. But I see it as a challenge.

Red Auerbach, nine championship rings, achieving the record -- it doesn't enter my consciousness. I mean, yes, I want to win. That's pretty obvious -- that's what our job is about. But the actual number of championships doesn't enter my consciousness. The only attachment it has to me is that it puts me in the company of Red Auerbach, and that creates illusions of greatness, because we all thought of Red as the greatest -- we thought what he did was an unattainable goal.

My dad always had this little sign on his desk: "The bigger your head is, the easier your shoes are to fill." He really drilled that in.

Here's the thing. If I were Bill Russell, and there were eleven championships and I'd been the MVP five times, I might have a vaulted opinion of my own self-worth.

My erstwhile mentor, companion, and colleague Tex Winter always states, "You're only a success for the moment that you complete a successful act."

Michael Jordan? The thing that strikes you about a person of that ilk is the amazing amount of energy and personal pride that they take in their performance. They have a sense of confidence that goes beyond a sense of failure -- somehow, the fear of failure can't inhibit their ability to perform. Michael befits that as great as any athlete I've ever seen. He met every level of expectation.

They're always going to be your children. A bump on the head is pretty traumatic when you have a six-month-old. And then you have a sixteen-year-old and it's a traffic ticket, a college student and a DUI. You have to be able to find a way to help them out of their life problems without being overbearing.

When I was young, I was dedicated to become a minister -- my brothers and I were formally brought in front of the congregation in a dedication ceremony, where we were dedicated to the future service of God. Today my mother likes to point out that none of us boys became ministers. But I like to say, "Well, you know, my parish is just fifteen." My team is my parish. That's who I am here to nurture.

There is a saying that I love. I'd have it magnetized to my refrigerator, but my refrigerator has a glass front, so I have it tacked to a small bulletin-board thing that I have. It says: "There are no Zen masters, there's only Zen." "Zen master" is a contradiction in terms. You don't master Zen.

Mike Sager Mike Sager is a bestselling author and award-winning reporter who's been a contributor to Esquire for thirty years.

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