The Week in Patriarchy is a weekly roundup of what’s happening in the world of feminism and sexism. If you’re not already receiving it by email, make sure to subscribe.

I am not one for conspiracy theories, and so I don’t find the guesses flying around the lefty internet about Melania Trump’s whereabouts particularly convincing. But I am very interested in double standards – and I find it hard to believe that if Michelle Obama disappeared from the public eye for nearly a month that there wouldn’t be some sort of sustained public inquiry.

It’s fun to imagine that Melania – who has been memed endlessly because of her apparent distaste for the president – has finally flown the coop and left her notoriously misogynist husband. And who knows, maybe she has.

But the reasons behind her lack of public appearances are less interesting to me than the fact that we’re so used to bizarre and out-of-bounds behavior from this administration that something like a missing first lady barely makes the grade for news coverage.

Things are weird, my friends. And they’re only going to get weirder.

Glass half full

Illinois just became the 37th state to ratify the Equal Rights Amendment, and wouldn’t it just be incredible to finally get this thing passed during the Trump years?

What I’m RTing

Spencer Ackerman (@attackerman) He's accused of tying a woman up in a basement to photograph her naked, making her perform oral sex on him when she tried to leave, and blackmailing her into silence. You misspelled "rape." https://t.co/BaRYzLQVOl

thomas violence (@thomas_violence) I love little cultural differences, like how Americans are super offended by the word cunt but here in Australia we're super offended by school children being slaughtered with automatic weapons

b-boy bouiebaisse (@jbouie) It is truly horrifying to see the collective political class shrug at the fact that thousands of Puerto Ricans are dead because of President Trump’s inaction and indifference.

Who I’m reading

Rebecca Traister on Samantha Bee and the war of words; Katha Pollitt on Ireland’s historic win for women and choice; and Erin Biba on the sexist mob defending Elon Musk.

What I’m listening to

Helen Rosner talking about #MeToo in the culinary world on David Chang’s podcast.

How outraged I am

A man who identifies himself as a rapist and pedophile is running for office in Virginia and thinks he will win because “a lot of people are tired of political correctness” and on a scale of one to ten, I’m going to take a nap.

How I’m making it through this week

Channeling this hedgehog’s chill.