FUCKGOATS by No Such lAbs ( closed in 2019)

Why is entropy important ?

Where does entropy come from ?

Can computers produce entropy ?

My computer came with a source of entropy, which appears to work. Why would I want a new one ?

Is there such a thing as better or worse entropy ?

No Such lAbs is pleased to announce its first hardware product, theFUCKGOATS is anTrue Random Number Generator suitable for use with workstations, servers, or any other hardware (such as a doomsday device), if the hardware in question is capable of taking a serial bit stream (via RS-232-to-USB converter, or directly, or by whatever other means such as a CAN bus)., for instance.As the old adage goes,Any Turing machine (such as any desktop or laptop computer, tablet, smartphone or other digital device of any type, kind, make or vintage, including without limitation any machinery used by any government for any purpose, be it nuclear tests, space flight, military applications not to mention Tamagotchis and old Nintendo boxes) is, by definition (and without exception possible in theory or ever encountered in practice), a. It can be opened equally well by all those who possess the mighty secret of the shape of its key : a square.Entropy provides the only solution available, and the only solution possible to this problem. The only way known, and the only way that can ever be or will ever be devised to transform a computer into my computer, as a matter of fact rather than an exercise in delusion -- relies on the use of entropy. There is not, nor could there ever be, any alternative.Consequently, the only fair statement of the situation is to point out that entropy is not merely fundamental, butfor personal as opposed tocomputing ; and as technological development pushes society further into the digital age, entropy becomes ever more central as the only available building block of individual existence. In short : without entropy, you don't exist, because without entropy -- there is no, there's only a morass ofEntropy comes from nature, and from nature only. While certain natural phenomena (such as Johnson-Nyquist noise and radioactive decay) are most readily mined for their entropy, other natural phenomena can in principle be used.The very idea ofrevolves around a set of techniques for countering the effects of entropic phenomena (e.g., electrical noise, background radiation, variations in temperature) and thereby creating maximallyautomata. And so, a digital computer per se is uniquely unsuited to the task of producing entropy, in much the same way that a blast furnace is uniquely unsuitable for refrigeration. It must be augmented with a device specifically built for the purpose of entropy collection.No computer sold today includes any such thing as angenerator of entropy. In particular, any circuit integrated into a CPU die is ipso facto non-auditable: current technology offers no practical, non-destructive means of disassembling and testing the individual components of such a device. Various other entities purport to offer TRNG units for sale. Similarly, various "other entities" purport to offer Bitcoin substitutes. We propose that on one hand all those other entities are politically suspect, in the sense that on more or less superficial analysis they all appear to be fronts for the same one entity known to dedicate itself to the subversion of personal computing ; and on the other hand technologically suspect, in the sense that none which make a sufficient set of claims to meet the definition of a True Random Number Generator also offer sufficient backing of their claims to convince anyone. In short - everyone else hawking TRNGs is either directly working for the NSA, or else indirectly (through virtue of stupidity) working for the NSA, but in either case can not be trusted.Entropy is an abstract physical concept, much like the notions of mass and energy. While certain specified objects can have more or less mass or energy than others, it can not be the case that they have aormass or energy. In the abstract there's only one entropy, just like there's only one inertial mass.

Unlike mass (in the pedestrian Newtonian understanding) and like energy, especially of the kinetic variety, entropy is not a property of static objects, but of systems. It is also a mistake to refer to the entropy of a number -- numbers are not physical objects at all, and there is no way to guarantee of a useful relationship between any number and the entropy of a system.

The number 5555 doesn't have more or less entropy than the numbers 4444 or 8315. The physical system with which these numbers were produced can be more or less entropic, but if all three came out of the same apparatus, then it's improper to say that one is "more random" than another -- entropy is an attribute of the process which produced them. The number 5555 can be the output of any kind of physical measurement, of a system with any degree of entropy, irrespective of the fact that 5555 may contradict naive expectations of patternlessness in entropic processes. (Also in this same vein, clouds are really not dragon shaped.)

But I've heard that entropy is measurable! And that there are several kinds of entropy.

Purelydefinitions of the so-called entropyexist (e.g., A. Kolmogorov's, or C. Shannon's.) In fact, a rough estimator of this kind of entropy is met with on nearly all personal computers: the ubiquitous 'PKZIP' data compressor. However, this type of entropy, even when measured over a sequence of sample strings in an effort to determine the statistical properties of, is merely incidental to the generator'sentropy. The two concepts are not interchangeable!

Confusing this mathematical definition of the entropy of bitstrings with the cryptographical definition of entropy of TRNGs is very dangerous for your cryptographic needs. This danger does not stay theoretical, but on the contrary often shows its claws in practice. The deranged practice of "whitening" for instance comes exactly from a misguided attempt to improve the cryptographic value of random streams by making them better fit the mathematical definition of entropy, at a cost of a multifaceted decrease in the actual security of the system.

What is cryptographic entropy?

Mathematical entropy, however defined, is a property of a particular bitstring. On the other hand, cryptographic entropy is a property of a system comprised of your entropy generator and the enemy. A cryptographer is interested in the likelihood that a bitstring produced by a particular generator is known to, or deducible by, the enemy. Mathematical analysis of an entropy generator is only of interest from a cryptographic point of view in so far as it provides answers to this question.

This concept is best illustrated by example. The mathematical entropy of the digits of Pi is very high by any measure. The cryptographic entropy of such a generator, however, is entirely nonexistent - the enemy will sooner rather than later figure out your process and subvert your expectations.

Similarly nonexistent is the cryptographic entropy of any bitstring displayed on a public Web site -- regardless of how said string was generated!

How does FUCKGOATS obtain its entropy ?

------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Figure 1. Connections in Standard FG Kit. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ +---------+ |+-------+| || || ||Cardano|| || RNG || || A || || || |+-------+| +---------+ | | | 3 R G V N N 3 G D | | | +---------+ | | | +----+ | +-----------+ | |CPLD| | | CP1202, |----5V-----| +----+ | +----+ FT232, |----GND----| | |USB or equiv. | | 'M' +-+ | +----+ USB UART | FUCKGOATS comes with a standard USB-to-TTL converter (which allows the unit to be plugged into any machine with an USB connector) as well as a Modulator, ("M" in the illustration) and two Cardano RNG 'TW' Analogue modules. There's also a variant available with an RS232-to-TTL converter in place of the USB unit. Bulk purchasers may request FUCKGOATS kits without any TTL converter (these can be sourced independently, at a cost of about $1 per unit in any serious quantity).



It is worth noting that only the RX pin of the converter's RX/TX pair is connected - during normal operation there is no communication of any kind from the host computer to the RNG. The RNG gets filtered, regulated power supply current plus an optional external clock (see fg.v).



The Cardano RNG 'TW' is an analogue circuit which produces a logic-level output fluctuating over time. Purchasers will receive a copy of its schematic, and are encouraged to create and publish their own compatible analogue modules. Any circuit which is capable of producing a nondeterministically-fluctuating logic-level voltage (e.g., a Geiger counter with trivial modifications) is a suitable substitute for the 'TW' - simply remove the TW and connect the substitute. This operation can be carried out bilaterally or on only one of the two ends, FUCKGOATS will carry on in either case. No Such lAbs may offer variant Analogue RNG modules of its own in the future.



The Modulator (M) combines inputs from the two Cardano RNG 'TW' included, performs debiasing with the Von Neumann Fair Coin algorithm, and modulates the result into bursts of serial bitstream at 115200 baud (8 b/b, 1 stop, 0 parity.). Purchasers will receive full schematics for the Modulator unit, a copy of the CPLD configuration (in Verilog), and also a copy of the compiled bitstream that was shipped with their particular unit. The creation, and, ideally, publication of compatible Modulator units is welcome.



FUCKGOATS' design departs radically from the shamanic traditions of the computer-insecurity industry as you know it. The FUCKGOATS unit consists of three interchangeable types of component, which may be substituted, mixed and matched much in the manner of LEGO blocks. They can also be tested individually using deterministic input-to-expected-output mappings. A Cardano RNG 'TW' contains two identical (XOR-ed) subcircuits, which are brought out to test points at the bottom side of the circuit board. The purchaser may thus verify the correct operation of these subcircuits at any point during the lifetime of the product.



The electromagnetic shield of a 'TW' analogue module is removable, and the inside of the unit may be examined (and manipulated, e.g., photographed, or filled with epoxy, etc.) by the owner. Given as the analogue module cannot be deterministically tested, it falls upon the serious user to carefully study his particular set and determine that the units' physical composition corresponds to the supplied electrical schematic.



The analogue module performs no post-processing of any kind on the output, and stores no digital state. The quality of the output is optimal at room temperature and with a reasonably-clean power supply. The Modulator is equipped with a ferrite bead, filter caps, and an independent linear regulator for the CPLD and each of the two analogue 'TW' modules. The owner may, at his option, power a FUCKGOATS unit from a battery (power supply pins are clearly marked - but batteries / casings are not included).



The Modulator is a digital circuit which debiases the output of the analogue RNG modules and converts it to a form usable by the host machine (e.g., a PC-compatible.) Importantly, and quite unlike the ubiquitous rubbish "T"RNG units presently sold by a multitude of charlatans, the bitstream is not whitened.



This so-called whitening is a pseudoscientific practice whereby the actual quality of a TRNG's output is masked by the 'perfume' of a 'mixing' function, whereby a defective or even wholly-dead generator will appear to function and pass statistical entropy tests by virtue of passing its output through a hash or stream cipher. Needless to say, such snake-oil may fool the naive operator and no one else - the use of this technique by hostile elements embedded by the USG in the computing community provides ample evidence of the deliberate and Empire-serving nature of the fraud.



The foregoing notwithstanding, the owner of a FUCKGOATS unit is of course free to process his unit's output in whatever manner he likes before use - in particular the XOR-ing together of three or more independent FUCKGOATS operated from isolated power supplies can not possibly hurt anything. That's nice and all, but can I verify any of it ? A great question to ask, and one you should definitely ask more often. Yes, you can verify exactly all of it. In the case of FUCKGOATS, and of FUCKGOATS alone, you can. We've built it deliberately so it's as easy to audit and modify as possible. Auditability by the end user happens to be a No Such lAbs core value. Customization is your strongest defense against supply-line sabotage. When your setup is spitefully, unpredictably, arbitrarily non-standard, vermin die squealing under your unyielding boot.



The current FUCKGOATS Modulator is based on a Xilinx XC9572XL, a CPLD with 72 macrocells. This is a Flash-based device, and is sold to us "empty". The bitstream is loaded via JTAG pins. This introduces an obvious attack vector: an enemy with physical access to your device could with relative ease replace the bitstream with one of his own, and thereby sabotage your RNG. The pill against this is to obtain a compatible JTAG interface (not included with your FUCKGOATS purchase, but nevertheless an inexpensive and commonplace item available from many different suppliers) and verify the contents of the CPLD's Flash against the supplied original (or your personal variant!)



Alternatively, the enemy may at some point contrive to supply S.NSA with boobytrapped CPLDs, designed to fail under particular circumstances by emitting a prearranged bitstream in place of the desired TRNG stream. The pill against this scenario is the presence of a ready means of deterministic test. It is for this reason that the Modulator is built to be trivially detachable from the analogue entropy gatherers.



As per FUCKGOATS design, a CPLD under audit has no way of knowing that it is connected to a test rig rather than to the set of analogue RNG modules it was sold with, and therefore the introduction of known waveforms into the analogue RNG module connectors must either cause the expected output to emerge from the modulator -- or else will unmask the boobytrapped (or failed -- nothing lasts forever) unit. If you create a known input:output pairing, you can audit your unit deterministically at any future time.



Here's an alternative, and very simple means of auditing a Modulator : ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Figure 2. An example Audit Circuit. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +---------+ |+-------+| || || ||Cardano|| || RNG || || A || || || |+-------+| +---------+ | | | | | +----------------+ | +-.--------------+ | | | | | | 3 R G R G V N N N N 3 G D G D | | | | | +---------+ +---------+ | | | | | +----+ | | +----+ | +-----------+ | |CPLD| | | |CPLD| | | CP1202, |----5V-----| +----+ | | +----+ |--... +----+ FT232, |----GND----| | | |--... |USB or equiv. | | 'M' +-+ | | 'M' +-+ | +----+ USB UART | Modulator (2) is hooked up in tandem to a known-good modulator (the Verilog circuit comprising the Modulator can be compiled for any brand of CPLD having the same or greater gate capacity) to the same set of known-good analogue RNG modules (or any other source of logic-level signal that could be substituted for testing purposes). The Analogue RNG boards must be connected through a latch clocked from the common clock shared by the FUCKGOATS units under test (see fg.v concerning master/slave clocking mode.)



The purchaser is encouraged to conceive of, and publish other audit methodologies. How do I get my hands on a few of these ? Click here to visit the S.NSA shop.



Please read the instructions and follow them exactly ! Or you could lose your coin! and we will not be able to help. Can I buy these for Happy Non-Denominational Holiday Celebration ? Certainly. Most people use computers, therefore most people would greatly benefit from the privacy enhancing power of a strong entropy generator. They don't even have to know what it is or how it works to benefit from its presence, buy it for them, gift it to them, install it for them and live happily ever after. It certainly beats anything Hallmark has to offer. When will my order ship? Your unit will ship on the next business day immediately after your Bitcoin transaction has the traditional 6 confirmations. I've received my FUCKGOATS, now what ? 1) Connect the USB-TTL Cable (if you ordered one) WARNING: If you miswire your FUCKGOATS, you may DAMAGE or DESTROY it! (In particular, if you connect the GREEN wire to anything. Leave the GREEN wire alone!) 2) Configure your TTY. (Replace /dev/ttyUSB0 with your device in examples below) It is ESSENTIAL to turn OFF flow control and the parsing of ANY special control characters on the TTY, and to set the baud rate. Under most versions of Linux, you can do this using: stty -F /dev/ttyUSB0 115200 raw -echo -echoe -echok If you are using another OS (e.g., FreeBSD) please consult your OS's documentation. Tip for Linux Users: Some Linux kernels contain a buggy driver which has problems handling more than two simultaneously connected USB2TTL cables of the type shipped with most FUCKGOATS units. The simplest workaround is to obtain a USB hub, and switch it to USB1 compatibility mode prior to plugging in a ganged set of three or more FUCKGOATS. As root: lsusb -t Then plug in the hub. lsusb -t Find the port number where the hub appeared. echo THEPORTNUMBER > /sys/bus/usb/devices/usb*/../companion Your ganged set of three or more FUCKGOATS should now function without problems. You can now proceed to the stty configuration step discussed earlier. 3) Basic Tests. Note: Both RNG-TW (Analogue) modules must be present and in working order during power-up, or FUCKGOATS will remain in a SAD state (steady RED lamp.) When performing basic tests, start with a powered FUCKGOATS, with BOTH RNG-TW (Analogue) modules installed. 1) Carefully remove BOTH RNG-TW (Analogue) modules. The SAD lamp will glow a steady RED. NO output will be seen on the serial TTY. ( use dd if=/dev/ttyUSB0 | hexdump -C ) 2) Reinstall ONE of the RNG-TW (Analogue) modules. The SAD lamp will flicker RED at approximately half duty cycle. Approximately HALF of the usual output bit rate will appear on the TTY. 3) Switch the single RNG-TW (Analogue) module to the empty socket. The observed result will be the SAME as in (2). 4) Reinstall the missing RNG-TW (Analogue) module, put the screws in place. NORMAL (full-bitrate) operation must resume. The SAD lamp always flickers SLIGHTLY during normal operation. 4) Advanced Tests. Make sure to configure your TTY correctly and to perform the Basic Tests. When satisfied, proceed below: dd iflag=fullblock if=/dev/ttyUSB0 of=fg.bin Obtain at least 1GByte. This may take several days. Afterwards, ent fg.bin dieharder -a -g 201 -f fg.bin Please remember that FUCKGOATS is a NON-WHITENED TRNG! Some tests will occasionally fail, this is a statistical inevitability. We recommend at least 24 hours of entropy distillation (solely via XOR-in-place !) if generating mission-critical, long-term cryptographic keys. We also recommend to use a USB-TTL cable other than the one shipped with your FUCKGOATS for mission-critical applications. The cable could be easily substituted or tampered with in transit by the enemy (say, to plant a RAGEMASTER in the USB housing!) Please do not hesitate to ask questions! I would like to use FUCKGOATS in a server! FUCKGOATS works quite well in servers. Make sure that your machine has adequate physical space inside. To make the connections, use the standard USB cord with a "mini-hub"; or obtain a TTL to RS232 converter for your machine's internal serial ports. Here, for instance, are the FUCKGOATS installed inside the machine formerly hosting this page:

Here's a schematic representation of FUCKGOATS :