I've never worked for the TSA. But once I spent a day putting airline passengers through what they believed was a full-body scanner, and I learned a few things about the American psyche. I also got sued, but we'll get to that later.

It was 2001, just a few months before 9/11. We were doing a sequence at the airport in Bullhead City, Ariz., for "Candid Camera" that was designed to parody the passenger screening process.

Pre-9/11...