If we know our audience, most of you are armed right now. And at some point you'll be sitting in your armory, drunk off your ass, sorting through your various weapons of death and thinking, "You know, I should really combine some of these to make one super weapon." Well, you're not the only one. That's how we wound up with... Advertisement

7 The Chainsaw Bayonet Starts With: The AR-15, an assault rifle which apparently just isn't good enough on its own. Continue Reading Below Advertisement Becomes Ridiculous By: Attaching a fucking chainsaw to the barrel. In theory, this provides the AR-15 with a viable melee option in the event that every round in the magazine has missed its intended target. Cracked feels at that point, the chainsaw might as well be an enchurrito.

"This is a very good idea!" To try to prove us wrong, the creator has posted his weapon on YouTube: Yeah, it should be noted that while the chainsaw bayonet seems to be ideal for dispatching a band of marauding pumpkins, it would probably not fare as well against enemies that can move and/or shoot back. Really Will Only Be Used By: Continue Reading Below Advertisement Gears of War nerds trying to carve FENIX into the side of their mom's hatchback after pulling an all-nighter drinking Mountain Dew game-fuel out of their collectible Halo 3 Slurpee cups.

6 The Wasp Knife Air-Shooting Knife Starts With: A nice, sharp diving knife, designed for hate-killing the living shit out of octopi, sharks, other divers, Snorks and Ursula the Sea Witch. Becomes Ridiculous By: Adding a gas canister in the handle to inject a basketball-sized wad of freezing cold gas out of the blade, and directly into the object of your stabbing aggression. It's labor-saving technology! Continue Reading Below Advertisement The knife's official website cites many practical applications for the gas-inflation technology, such as floating carcasses to the surface to avoid attracting more predators and punishing disobedient children in Willy Wonka's chocolate factory.

Also, if you hate watermelons, you can stab AND blow it up. Finally. What the website doesn't explain is why anyone would shell out $400 for what amounts to a pointy can of Dust-Off, unless the army finally read all those letters we sent them and are preparing to fight the greatest threat our nation has yet faced: terrorist sharks. Really Will Only Be Used By: Continue Reading Below Advertisement James Bond. In Live and Let Die, Bond dispatched Kananga with a shark-gun pellet to the face, inflating him like a balloon until he exploded. We imagine MI6 buys this Wasp Knife shit by the gross.