Go to townhall meeting with petition against socialized medicine; get as many people as possible to sign. At the bottom of the form, in small type, will be the text "Signatories of this petition agree to voluntarily give up their Medicare benefits, now and for the remainder of their lives. This petition will be delivered to Medicare administrators so that signatories may be stricken from the rolls." Turn the damn thing in.

Go to a townhall meeting. Tell people you're selling Hitler insurance, and for a hundred bucks each you can assure them that Hitler will not come into their home that night to give them an anal probe. Trust me, these people aren't too bright -- you'll make a fortune. If Hitler does return and starts probing people, declare yourself an investment bank and ask for a ten trillion dollar bailout.

Go to a townhall meeting with tray of jello squares. Tell people you're from the Obama administration and you're giving away samples of a new product. When people ask, tell them the name of the product is "Soylent Grandma".

Go to a townhall meeting. In loud, outraged voice tell the audience that you've read the Obama healthcare plan, and on page six hundred forty seven it requires euthanizing stupid people. Try to gauge which audience members seem most concerned by your revelation.

Go to townhall meeting with "I hate healthcare!" sign. When people take picture of you, shout "YOU'RE STEALING MY SOUL" and chase them from the building.