UNOFFICIAL GUIDE TO BEING A MAN

For the GUYS - what every man should know.

GS – UNOFFICIAL GUIDE TO BEING A MA N

Stop talking about where you went to college.

Always carry cash. Keep some in your front pocket.

Rebel from business casual. Burn your khakis and wear a suit or jeans.

Never stay out after midnight three nights in a row … unless something really good comes up on the third night.

You will regret your tattoos.

Never date an ex of your friend.

When the bartender asks, you should already know what you want to drink.

If you perspire, wear a damn undershirt.

When people don’t invite you to a party, you really shouldn’t go. And sometimes even when you are invited, you shouldn’t go.

People are tired of you being the funny, drunk guy.

When in doubt, always kiss the girl.

No selfies. Aspire to experience photo-worthy moments in the company of a beautiful woman.

There’s always another level. Just be content knowing that you are still better off than most who have ever lived.

You can get away with a lot more if you're the one buying the drinks.

Ask for a salad instead of fries.

Don’t split a check.

Pretty women who are unaccompanied want you to talk to them.

When a bartender buys you a round, tip double.

The cliché is that having money is about not wasting time. But in reality, money is about facilitating spontaneity.

Do not use an electric razor.

Desserts are for women. Order one and pretend you don’t mind that she’s eating yours.

Buy a tuxedo before you are thirty. Stay that size.

Place-dropping is worse than name-dropping.

Yes, of course you have to buy her dinner.

Staying angry is a waste of energy.

Always bring a bottle of something to the party.

If it’s got velvet ropes and lines, walk away unless you know someone.

Feigning unpretentiousness is worse than being pretentious. Cut it out with the vintage Polo and that ’83 Wagoneer in Nantucket.

The New Yorker is not high-brow. Neither is The Economist.

No-one cares if you are offended, so stop it.

Never take an ex back. She tried to do better and is settling with you.

Read more. It allows you to borrow someone else’s brain, and will make you more interesting at a dinner party – provided that you don’t initiate conversation with, “So, who are you reading …”

Hookers aren’t cool, and remember, the free ones are a lot more expensive.

Don’t ever say, “it is what it is.”