How come Manchester United are in such difficulties?

Once upon a time, two very rich men, John Magnier, a leading shareholder in Manchester United, and Sir Alex Ferguson, the manager, were good friends. But a huge argument over a racehorse spilled over into the club's affairs, resulting in a series of articles alleging transfer irregularities and a snowballing sense of doom.

But how could a nag shake a football club?

This wasn't just any racehorse. This was Rock of Gibraltar, worth up to £200m at stud. In a deal done over a handshake, Ferguson, who had paid nothing for his half-share of the horse, thought that he would receive half that cash when the horse retired. But Magnier declined, saying Ferguson could breed just one mare a year for five years from the horse. Things became even more bitter when last year Ferguson started a legal action against Magnier and turned down a £7m settlement. Magnier now seems resistant to an out of court settlement, despite Fergie's apparent willingness to accept around 15% of breeding rights.

So it's been handbags at dawn ever since?

Indeed. It just so happens that after this small disagreement a rash of stories appeared in the press, attacking the board, United's transfer deals and finally Ferguson's contract negotiations. Allegedly Magnier and his business partner JP McManus - who now own 28.89% shares in the club as Cubic Expression - employed corporate investigators Kroll to look into United's affairs. They have also issued the club with '99 questions' about the club's internal affairs, including Ferguson's contract, the mishandling of the Rio Ferdinand drugs case and a conflict of interest between agents, in particular Ferguson's son Jason and his Elite agency, and the top people at Old Trafford.

So which transfers are considered dubious?

How long have you got? Frosty eyebrows have been raised over this month's purchase of Louis Saha - just why did the agents need £750,000 when Saha was desperate to come to United? And was it just coincidence that Saha's rep has been investigated for bungs across the rest of Europe?

Erm...

And while you're sitting comfortably in that paisley armchair, let's go back to the summer and consider the transfer of Tim Howard from New York Metrostars and the secret payment of £139,000 to a business partner of Jason Ferguson. Or David Bellion from Sunderland, where Elite were accused of making secret inducements to the player, or 18-year old Cristiano Ronaldo's £12m move from Sporting Lisbon when other clubs had agreed a fee of half that amount. Then there were worries about United's costs over the transfer of Kleberson and, going back to August 2001, over the involvement of Elite in the sale of Jaap Stam against the wishes of the then chairman, Sir Roland Smith. And just to round things off, there are the deals involving Rio Ferdinand, Juan Sebastián Verón, Massimo Taibi, Laurent Blanc, Roy Carroll, Diego Forlan, Jonathan Greening and Mark Wilson. Will that do?

And United's response to these criticisms?

They have released a statement denying that Ferguson had any financial or contractual involvement in the buying or selling of first-team players. They have also announced an internal investigation into their transfer deals, to be led by the club's finance director Nick Humby.

Mmm. So who's on top at the moment?

It's definitely advantage Coolmore Mafia. In recent weeks Ferguson - who was lined up to sign a three and a half year deal worth more than £4m a year - instead opted for a 12-month rolling contract - much more in line with the thoughts of Magnier and McManus. What's more, the Irishmen have increased their stake in United and are now demanding seats on the board and a greater say in the way the club is run.

So what's their game?

According to most analysts, they want to install themselves as the key powerbrokers at Old Trafford. They see the club as a massive, underexploited source of the hard shiny stuff, and view the club's failure to pursue a more aggressive commercial strategy across the world as a serious blunder. They don't, however, seem to want to mount a takeover of the club - something they would be legally obliged to do if their stake rose above 30%.

What's Fergie's mood like?

Well, he hasn't yet plugged in the hairdryer, but he has responded to the criticism of his dealings by claiming it is 'incomprehensible' that he would abuse his position at United. Fergie says that his son Jason is having 'a terrible time' and accused unspecified shady folk of hiding in the bushes and going through his son's mail. But that's only landed him in more bother. The writ-happy Irishmen have taken his comments personally and are apparently investigating the possibility of suing Fergie for defamation. Looks like he can't win.

Whose side are the fans on?

Definitely Fergie's. Banners and T-shirts abusing Magnier and McManus were on display during the 3-2 victory over Southampton at Old Trafford. Supporters' groups claim to be considering 'guerilla tactics', including throwing footballs under Coolmore horses at race meets.

Will this bother Magnier and McManus?

Not likely. They are unimpressed by the club's internal review, which they say "didn't address the serious issues about corporate governance" contained in their letter to the board.

So what's the latest?

Well, apparently Magnier and McManus aren't the only Gaelic-tinged businessmen the United board have been biting their nails over. Enter one Malcolm Glazer, owner of NFL team the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, and the club's second-largest individual shareholder next to the Coolmore two; a man also known as the lickpenny leprechaun, apparently for his cherubic dimples. He's just upped his own stake in the club and is believed to be more likely to mount a takeover.

God, this is confusing. Who's side is he on?

Ferguson's apparently. But just like the Coolmore Mafia, he's believed to want United to step up their commercial activities in north America, where 'soccer' is currently the fastest-growing sport.

Crikey. It sounds like this one's set to run and run...

Indeed. You're not surprised, are you?