Oh, Green Day. Once upon a time, years before the Berkeley band ventured into Broadway musicals and any endorsement deal that came along, they were the model for every 90s slacker, from punks to alterna-rockers. And of all their videos from that era, “When I Come Around” is the most slackerist. Absolutely nothing happens in the video. They just sort of amble around together aimlessly while a bunch of creepy people look out their windows. Oh and a couple makes out on a car. But somehow, through the nothing, Green Day taught me and a ton of other 90s kids a few things about style. And then eventually, they started looking like, as I affectionately call them, the Punk Rock Golden Girls.

Let's begin…

CASUALLY PULLING A PAYPHONE OFF THE HOOK IS LITERALLY THE COOLEST THING A HUMAN CAN DO

Because of this video, I will to this day still pull a payphone off the hook if I pass one. Unfortunately, you almost never see payphones anymore, and if you do, there’s usually some homeless dude using it to have a pretty heated discussion with his imaginary lawyer. Pulling phones is a careful art though. You can’t just say, “Hey guys! I’m gonna go pull that payphone off the hook. Watch how hilarious! Everybody watch!” No. You’ve gotta be all casual. When you’re walking past the phone, pull it off and keep walking. Don’t look back, don’t check anybody’s reaction, and for damn sure don’t laugh. If someone asks about it, you should be like, “Oh, did I pull the phone off the hook? I didn’t notice.” *shrug shoulders, put hands back in pockets*

TOUCHING WALLS IS LITERALLY THE SECOND COOLEST THING A HUMAN CAN DO

Mike Dirnt’s attempt at casual-cool in this video falls way short of pulling a payphone off the hook, but much like many things in life, Mike Dirnt works with what he’s got. So if you’re in a narrow hallway, touch both walls as if to say, “Hey, look at me. I can touch two walls at the same time. No big deal.” It isn’t a big deal, by the way.

HOWEVER YOUR HAIR LOOKS IS TOTALLY FINE

Even though in this video, Tré Cool’s hair looks like he either stuck his finger in an electrical socket or got a glimpse of his future career, Billie Joe Armstrong, on the other hand, has a pretty unassuming haircut with a boring ol’ natural color. This was an eye opener that maybe I no longer needed my bleached spikes which were popular among pop punk kids at the time and unfortunately made their way onto my very first driver’s license. So I later dyed my hair black which made no sense because my hair is about as dark as brown can get. And now my hair just sort of sits atop my head in its natural color, conveying to the world that I just don’t have the patience to care what it looks like. Thanks for the hairspiration, Billie.

YOU DON'T HAVE TO WEAR A BAND SHIRT EVERY SINGLE DAY OF YOUR LIFE

Wait a minute. So maybe punk rock is not all about fashion and maybe you don’t have to wear a black band t-shirt every single minute of every single day and you can just get away with wearing something as simple as a lame sweater that looks like something your grandmother gave you for Christmas? Nah.

YOU SHOULD HAVE ALL KINDS OF RANDOM STUFF DANGLING FROM YOUR BELT

Obviously chain wallets were a requirement at this time, as made clear by the movie Swingers. But chain wallets weren’t enough. You also needed metal rings and keychains and spare hats and all kinds of crazy crap dangling from your belt. You weren’t cool unless you sounded like a drawer full of silverware was hanging from your waist at all times.

YOU SHOULD HAVE TERRIBLE POSTURE AND LOOK REALLY AWKWARD

Part of being a slacker is treating your body like it’s the first day you’ve ever used it. Don’t bother standing up straight or wearing your clothes the way they were meant to be worn. Maybe fold your arms awkwardly like Tré Cool to give off that I’m-used-to-wearing-a-straightjacket-look. If you’re wearing a coat, just let it hang pointlessly off your shoulders. When in doubt, just make like Billie Joe Armstrong and go with the slacker fail-safe: Hands in your pockets. A great way to give off the constant attitude of a shoulder shrug and a guaranteed chipped tooth if you trip.

PANTS SHOULD BE WORN LOW BUT NOT LIKE, "RAP" LOW

As anyone who listened to any sort of rock music in 90s can tell you, there was an ongoing and, in hindsight, pretty pointless feud between rock and rap that divided the two cultures. This was also a time when ridiculously sagging baggy pants were being co-opted by lame white kids. The very first time we saw Green Day in this video is a shot of their butts and to my surprise, their pants were sort of baggy. This might’ve raised a lot of questions about the binary nature of music at the time (and also what kind of director would choose to start a video with a shot of three men’s asses) but meh, comfort is comfort. (Also, you and your bros should coordinate beforehand so that you're all wearing different colored pants.)

DON'T LET YOUR PANTS TOUCH YOUR ANKLES

I never did abide by this style, but I had friends that did. Like Billie Joe, you want your pants and your shoes to look like they are not on speaking terms. Show about four inches of sock—in Billie’s case, plain white— but argyle works better. This was a tricky-sized pair of pants to find though since, as mentioned above, pants should be a little baggy. Finding that baggy-but-short pair often required shopping in the husky section for young boys. Nothing feels so punk as shopping in the same section of Sears where moms buy their portly kids their school pants.

YOU AND YOUR FRIENDS SHOULD ALL WEAR THE SAME CHUCK TAYLORS

No point in trying to stand out in the shoe department. Just buy a huge industrial-sized crate of Converse All Stars and rummage around until you find your size.

DAYTIME IS FOR LAME PEOPLE

Only hang out at night. And by “hang out,” I mean just sort of wander the streets aimlessly. The fact that this video takes place entirely at night in random, nondescript places led to my teenage years being wasted in Starbucks parking lots with my hands in my pockets.

Dan Ozzi is the punk editor at Noisey and the style editor forced him to write this. Follow him on Twitter - @danozzi.