Now that you’re an adult and you don’t have Mommy around to supervise your playtime, are you often worried about your well-being? Well, fret not, mi amigos, because safety regulator and Slipknot percussionist Christ Fehn is looking out for YOU!

Fehn — y’know, the one with the penis face — recently bemoaned the state of the modern pit to Music Review:

“I think, especially in America, moshing has turned into a form of bullying. The big guy stands in the middle and just trucks any small kid that comes near him. They don’t mosh properly anymore. It sucks because that’s not what it’s about. Those guys need to be kicked out. “A proper mosh pit is a great way to be as a group and dance, and just do your thing.”

On the one hand, European mosh pits, which end with hugs, are indeed far more civil than those in the States, and I get Fehn’s point, as there are definitely some assholes who leap into the pit with the specific intention of do actual bodily harm to a fellow concertgoer. (For the record, I also really hate those people who try to shove non-moshers into the pit, as well as karate-moshers. Moshing should be a voluntary activity, and I’m sorry you parents did show you enough attention as a child but that’s no reason to introduce martial arts into the equation.) On the other hand, a) there is literally not a single activity on the planet enjoyed by humans that is not in constant danger of being ruled by assholes, who make up most of the population at any given time, b) it’s a goddamn motherfucking moshpit, I dunno how you can tell the so-called “bullies” apart from everyone else who’s going apeshit and running into one another at full speed, and c) given that it is a voluntary action, I think everyone involved should be (and probably is) well-aware of the potential physical dangers. Big dudes definitely should not specifically being looking for lil’ dudes to lay out, but lil’ dudes should also be aware that it’s a chaotic environment in which they may get accidentally laid out.

Am I not being sensitive enough to the needs of the vertically-challenged? Or is Fehn, indeed, behaving like a overprotective Jewish mother? Debate this most vexing of issues in the comments section below.

[via Lambgoat]