When surreal nightdreams bleed into morning reality and confused bedmates wake up on a bunk-boat in a carpet sea, they best know how to sail. Today's Groupon teaches the values of maritime navigation: for $185, you get a two-day sailing lesson from Spinnaker Sailing (a $375 value). Voyage to Pier 40 of the South Beach Harbor for a two-day midweek or weekend lesson that lasts six hours each day and provides step-by-step guidance from ASA-certified sailing instructors.

The phenomenon of sailing marries an understanding of wind's benevolent powers with an oceanic communion capable of transporting seafarers to and fro across the sea's misty expanses. Spinnaker Sailing's lessons pit new students against the challenges of the San Francisco Bay as highly experienced teachers show the ropes, sails, and technical machinations any able skipper needs to know to negotiate the gentle waves. Basic keelboat sailing I teaches the fundamentals of sailing from the deck of a Santana 22 as four students gather together to learn the anatomy of a boat, sailing vernacular, boat safety, knot philosophy, steering, wind patterns, and more over the course of two consecutive six-hour days. All skills and lessons are put into practice, developing immediate sailing confidence in the rookiest of landlubbers.

Classes are scheduled for Mondays and Tuesdays from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. or Saturdays and Sundays from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m., giving both 9-to-5 professionals and weekend freelancers the opportunity to learn their ports, starboards, and man-overboards. Be sure to wear sunscreen, dress warmly, and avoid wearing black-soled shoes, which can leave marks on the pristine boat decks. Participants will take a midday lunch break, so pupils are encouraged to bring money or food that won't attract the boat-side chompers of hungry lion seals.