I had been married for 35 years, mostly happily, but one day I met an attractive woman from Australia while I was in Auckland at a convention. We really connected and kept in contact. Because she travelled to NZ frequently for business we would often meet for coffee or dinner. After a few months we began an affair.



During one rendezvous she informed me she was pregnant.



I didn’t want to shirk my responsibilities but I also didn’t want to ruin my marriage so I suggested that she call me at home and leave a coded message on my answerphone when the baby was born and I would send her some money for child support.



Because she was from Italian heritage we agreed the code word would be “ Spaghetti.”



One day about 9 months later I came home from work to find my wife looking very confused.



She said “ Honey, there’s a very strange message on the answerphone. Have a listen.” Curious, I pushed the play button and heard the following:



“Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti. Two with meatballs, one without.”



That’s when I knew the game was up so I told my wife about the affair and pregnancy. I don’t have much recollection after this point.



When I awoke from my coma (cause unknown according to the female neurosurgeon) I found out my wife had filed for divorce and after the settlement and lawyer fees I was only left with the machine that initiated my downfall. Irony is a cruel mistress.



I am selling it today not only because it is all that I have left but I’ve got 3 ‘pasta dishes’ to support.



It is a:



Uniden 7000A Digital Answering Machine and comes with power adapter, phone cord and instruction manual. Some of the features are:



9 Minutes Digital Record Time;

Time/Date Stamp;

No Tapes

Fast Message Playback;

Digital Display & Message Counter;

Battery Back-Up Option;

Dual Outgoing Message;

Call Screening and lots more.



I have cleaned most of the blood stains off the unit.

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