A creationist by the name of Bobby Johnstone out of Florida claims the only proof we need that God created Earth and all the animals is the fact that T-Rex arms are so short which inhibit the ability to masturbate.

“Obviously, masturbation is a sin. That’s why God made the biggest, baddest dinosaur in all the land not be able to touch himself. The proof is in the pudding.”

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Dr. Johnstone performed several experiments with a life-sized T-Rex to see if the arms could reach the nether regions. Out of all the different combinations of positions, not a single one allowed the dino to relieve himself.

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He also watched all of the Jurassic Park and Jurassic World movies and assured us that there isn’t a single T-Rex masturbation scene. Not one. This was by far the most compelling evidence Dr. Johnstone presented.

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