tinderventure:

First date is going well. She’s way out of my league and seems very much into me. Later, we’re back at my place, after dinner and making out on the couch a little. We head into the bedroom and the clothes are coming off. Just as I’m about to slip it in, she says, “wait.” “What?” “You should know, I have herpes.” “Very funny.” “No, I really do. And I’m in the middle of an outbreak.” “You’re joking.” “I’m not. Do you need a minute?” (being fairly herpes-naive, I reply,) “Uh, yup.” I go out to my porch and sit down on a chair. After a minute, I can hear her crying in my bedroom. She dresses and comes out. She asks me if I need time to think. I tell her that I do. We talk a little about other things, I drive her home and then spend the weekend completely torn up, weighing my options. (“Is she worth getting herpes over? You’ve only known her for six hours”) Ultimately, I go out with her a few more times and it turns out, not only does she have the herps, but she’s bat shit crazy. I dump her, she tries to kill herself (another hilarious story in and of itself), and I test negative for herpes. Back to the drawing board!

This is fucking ridiculous. This guy should feel bad about what he put this girl through.

I know what this girl is going through. I know that embarrassment, that humiliation, that shame, that guilt… And the regret that came afterward from giving too big of a fuck to something that never warranted or needed my concern in the first place. A few months ago, I found out I have oral herpes, HSV-1, and made the stupid decision to tell a person I was admiring that I had it. When I did, she didn’t want anything to do with me. Which actually goes to show how mature she was, and the same can be said for this guy here. If anyone has ever cracked open a 6th grade biology book, they’d know that herpes viruses are no fucking different from Influenza viruses.

How do you ask? Well you see kids, HSV-1&2, or Herpes Simplex Virus, is just a virus! That means, when broken down, it develops, breeds, and spreads exactly like the common cold, chicken pox, influenza, and Mumps. How do these diseases work? Well kids, when a virus has finished wrecking its havoc on our bodies, our immune system may have snubbed the virus’ symptoms, but the virus will live in our bodies forever in the form of DNA. That’s because when a virus infects our body, it joins its DNA with ours, so that particular strain can breed and survive. Every strain of influenza that we as the human race have come across, has combined its DNA with ours. How else do you think we build immunities to these diseases? Why do you think the Common Cold and the Flu’s genetic code changes every Spring and Fall? Why do you think we get sick every Spring and Fall? Because viruses change their genetic coding every change of season so that they don’t die out. The same can be said with Herpes viruses; this is why it is nearly impossible to kill a virus, because they are constantly changing their DNA (by hybridizing it with humans’)

We don’t have to have sexual intercourse in order to spread Herpes viruses, so no, Herpes is NOT an STD. Nine times out of ten, a person contracts HSV-1 as an infant through the kisses they receive from their parent, or family members, or friends. That means 19 out of 20 people you meet every day have either come into contact with or already have HSV-1 or 2. You know those cold sores you get on your lip once every 2 years? You know that white head that pops up on your junk every winter? You know that condition those Abreva Lip Balm commercials advertise for? That’s Herpes.

It’s not some ugly, giant, disgusting thing to be ashamed of or hide from other people, and neither are you. You have absolutely nothing to be ashamed of if you have HSV-1 or HSV-2. Stopping someone to tell them you have herpes before you have sex is like stopping someone to tell them you have brown hair. Yes it’s scary, but so is everyone else, and just because you know where those cold sores are coming from now, doesn’t mean you deserve to be quarantined. 90% of the world’s population has Oral Herpes, and that’s just the individuals that have been tested.

Testing positive for Herpes is no different from testing positive for the Common Cold.





And if anyone thinks that they’re above you simply because you get a pimple-from-hell every time it gets cold, then they’re the ones that need to be quarantined and they deserve to be butt fucked by the pedestal they’re prancing on.