MITTENS: I've been going over some inter-office emails and I noticed a disturbing amount of emails are between professors mocking student writing.

KLOWNUS: That's professional development.



MITTENS: Does that really seem like the best use of resources? Being a jerk about those you're trying to help?

KLOWNUS: To be, or not to be, that is the question.



MITTENS: While I professionally respect your attitude toward teaching, I am personally annoyed by your response.

KLOWNUS: Behold, I have taught you ambivalence!



