Judging by all the things he gets blamed for, Satan seems like a pretty busy guy. Even so, he apparently finds time to keep up with current movie releases. Like Left Behind, the new Nic Cage apocalypse thriller from faith-based Stoney Lake Entertainment.

The Prince of Darkness himself is quoted in the latest ad for the film. Because why get blurbed by the usual Rotten Tomatoes crowd when you can go really big? See the Left Behind Satan quote after the jump.

The Left Behind ad in question debuted on Facebook.

See what the Left Behind marketing team is doing there? It’s called reverse psychology, and Satan has apparently never heard of it because he is not being very savvy here. If he wanted to keep unbelievers from seeing the movie, he should said “Bring everyone to this movie!” That would have really confused ’em.

And don’t try and tell me Satan’s just being honest. He is the embodiment of all evil. Surely he’s not above lying to serve his own nefarious purposes. Unless… is he actually lying? Does he secretly want people to see this movie? It’s so hard to tell with him, sometimes.

Oddly, Satan doesn’t offer any thoughts on the quality of the movie. Is the story compelling? Is the action well directed? Is it a return to form for Cage? Surely the faithful and the faithless alike would prefer to know whether a film is actually any good before forking over $13 for a ticket, but we don’t know because Satan won’t tell us. Which, come to think of it, is an appropriately dick move.

Elsewhere, Left Behind also quotes a collection of notable Christians, one of the Duck Dynasty guys (not the one who keeps getting in trouble), and the Book of Matthew. Getting the exec producer to offer a blurb seems iffy, but pulling from a religious text written thousands of years before the movie hit theaters might be even shadier.

This Left Behind is actually the second adaptation of Jerry B. Jenkins and Tim LaHaye‘s novels. It’s intended to be more “mainstream” than the last one starring Kirk Cameron was, but obviously it hasn’t shed its Christian leanings. If any of those endorsements pique your interest, Left Behind lands in theaters October 3.