More smiles. My smile is a bit grumpy at this point though. Maybe we see a shrug from my opponent. A shrug that states that this is a game, and I might not like winning this way but it could very well have been you that did this to me. We have both agreed upon terms, time and place for this to go down. I keep looking at my opponent, trying to point out, without words how unfair it is. He keeps his gentle smile. This, it says, this here- my beautiful white marbled library with perfectly illustrated golden domes, domes that just point up at the rather nice weather that the people walking the stairs seem to be having. Not too hot, not too cold! This, this is a part of all the crap we’ve decided on. And sometimes it’s good crap, sometimes it’s bad crap. You know, as a kid, I have always dreamed of owning this little paper card, and here we are. We are in understanding about the situation we got going. And then you look down at your hand, your bleak future. You can’t keep up with two cards a turn when all you do is trading resources. But then you tell yourself that this is just a silly game, it doesn’t matter in the big scope of things. It’s all about spending time with some nice people and having a good time … But I’m not having a good time!

Sometimes, Magic is a bit like a game of Monopoly. It’s all laughs and shit- a great time with your family. Someone farts or make a joke on your expense and everyone points and you and they laugh. You just take it because it’s all good, we’re all good. But then the dice lands you on some crazy fucking expensive residential street that you don’t own. That’s when the farts and jokes ain’t funny no more. This is when shit gets real and you go Christian Bale ballistic and totally freak out.

“Hey! Calm down, it’s just a game. I will lend you the money.”

“I do not want your fucking money.”

“It’s all good. We’re just having a good time here.”

“Well, I AM NOT HAVING A GOOD TIME.