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Thanks to the work of all the manager-janitors (manitors?), "the whole place had a strong industrial-strength cleaner smell to it." And yet, "your nose still picked it up; something was always off. Under all those harsh chemicals, there was still this smell of lonely unwashed horny men."

And women. "One time as I was closing up, I noticed one of the couches in the couple's section was almost entirely soaked. I was curious. I sniffed it. [Editor's note: WHY GOD NO WHY?] This job desensitizes you. It was squirt. This lady had squirted over the entire couch, in front of everyone. It looked like someone had emptied the contents of a two-liter bottle of Sprite. I flipped the cushion around, spritzed some Febreze on there, and continued closing up."

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In conclusion, a porn theater is about as hygienic as you would expect it to be.