That’s an eye-catching title, right? Well as someone who for many years was not a happy person, but who is now, miraculously, happy and inspired a whole lot of the time, there are some things I have learned.

1) Lower your expectations. That might not sound like a good way to get happier. But it is. Every year for the past…many years (see my expectations of myself are low enough that I know I’m not going to go look that up right now and I’m ok with that) there has been a study on what country is the happiest on Earth. It is always Denmark. Is it Denmark? I’m not going to look that up either. Only because that’s beside the point. The point is that the reason they report they are happy is because they don’t expect that much. A warm place to sleep, some good friends, family, a job….yep, they are happy. This is actually a serious point they are making. We as a culture are obsessed with bettering ourselves. Are your teeth white enough? Are you a millionaire yet? Are you a supermodel? Triathlete? No? What’s wrong with you? Of course most of us are none of those things but we tend to hold ourselves up to those kinds of ideals as “success” and therefore, we often feel like we just aren’t good enough. Lower your expectations. It’s easier than training for a triathlon anyway. Look at what you have and practice gratitude. Not shallow “I’m glad I have my health” but you don’t really mean it when you say it. Practice really feeling gratitude for the things you do have. A roof over your head, a warm clean, safe place to sleep, fridge full of food, friends and or family. If you have those things you are ahead of the vast majority of the people on this planet. If you write down 2 or 3 things every day that you are truly grateful for you will find yourself getting happier without anything external having to change at all. It’s true. It’s all in our perception of our lives. So lower those expectations and be ok, no be in LOVE, with having a good enough life.

2) After you’ve lowered your expectations and you feel happier…do also live your best life (is that sentence copyrighted by Oprah?) Spend some time getting in touch with what your real purpose is. This is a whole other blog post. Maybe for tomorrow. But it’s true that real joy in our lives does come from using what gifts we were given in this life. Not using them makes us feel stuck, trapped, like we aren’t in our “real” life. You don’t have to radically change your life, just add authenticity into your days. BE who you are in little ways all the time. Don’t worry if other people will like you or understand you or approve of you. Just be who you know you are. You’ll notice a difference. You’ll feel happier.

3) Be good to your body. Just purely physically – eat well, get a little exercise now and then. And sleep. You can’t feel really great when you are toxic with fast food and lethargy and knowing you are making bad choices for yourself. Baby steps. Just add a few healthy choices a week and in a few months this too will be boosting your happiness.

4) Practice gratitude and also take action. This is a most amazingly powerful combination. Practice gratitude for the things you have in your life. And when your mind wanders to something you don’t like, then take an action toward changing it. Don’t feel frustrated that you can’t instantly change your life into your dream vision. Maybe you can. It happens. But just start by taking one small action. Want to lose weight? Just walk in the evenings. No gym membership required. Just go for a walk. Want to open your own business? Start networking with local small business owners. Do some on-line reading. Take a free online course from the small business administration. What I know is that we can’t know the whole path to our goals before we start. Don’t get frozen because you can’t see all the way to the finish line. Just take one small step and know that it will lead to another small step, and another. And instead of a whole other year going by just thinking about the changes you want to make, you’ll find those small steps have really added up to something big over time. I think it’s kind of part of that lowering your expectations thing again. I used to only want to start an endeavour if I was sure it would end in wild success before I wasted my time actually putting any effort into it. I know now life doesn’t work like that. It’s all about the journey. Just start walking the path toward the change you want and see where it takes you.

5) I could list a few more great tips for being happier but I have to go pick my sons up from school. Oh yeah – be in the moment. That’s probably the biggest one of all. So I will be in the moment and leave this and go enjoy the chaos of 2 little boys….