Hayley Benton

hbenton@citizen-times.com

We've all been there: You've clocked out of your downtown job. You're walking to your car. You just want to get home to some much-needed you-time.

At 6 p.m., it's already well past beer-and-sofa o' clock — but a cluster of map-reading tourists is blocking the path, huddled together on the sidewalk, pointing to a group of buskers and excitedly pulling out their phones.

A fanny-pack-wearing woman in a large sun hat taps your shoulder as you slink past, and you're already prepared for what's coming.

"Excuse me," she half-shouts over the twang of a banjo, grasping a dozen pamphlets. "Are you local?"

Like a good Ashevillean, you put on a friendly face and point the gaggle of gawkers toward their destination. Maybe you even walk them there, if it's on the way — well aware that your inner hospitable Southerner is showing.

It's all just part of living in a tourist town — a popular destination for others to vacation while you watch from your office above. But it's no coincidence that outsiders love Asheville, and, especially for transplants, it's easy to remember a time when you were just as transfixed by the streets of downtown and the surrounding natural beauty, when everything about the city seemed new and exciting.

Being a tourist isn't so bad. Jaded from the day-to-day experience? Fall in love with Asheville all over again and do like a tourist (even if it's only for a little while). Get out your fanny packs, find a big floppy hat and get ready to take a whole lot of pictures. We've got your itinerary right here. We promise not to judge.

Learn more and take a tour

The silly option: One of the best and most obvious ways to get in touch with your inner tourist is to take a tour. For our Scene cover shoot, Jim and Jen Lauzon, the owners of LaZoom Comedy Tours, graciously (and hilariously) agreed to be our goofy, confused tourist models — (and we're convinced they were drawing from observed experience). Who knows tourists better than a tour company?

Get on the big purple bus and learn a bit about Asheville's history and its neighborhoods — and laugh a little (or a lot) along the way. There's a $26 City Comedy Tour during the day, a $23 Haunted Comedy Tour in the evenings, a $31 Band & Beer Bus Tour on the weekends and a $16 family-friendly Kids' Comedy Tour on Saturdays. With a handful of crazy characters, you'll meet the crew behind Asheville's quirkiest personality: the infamous nun-on-wheels, Sister Bad Habit (which also happens to be a costumed Lauzon).

It doesn't get more goofy tourism than this. Book a tour for your Asheville staycation at lazoomtours.com.

The historic option: If you've had enough of downtown, find a place you've never been before and learn a little more about the region's history. Aside from the obvious (the Biltmore Estate, the Thomas Wolfe House, the Basilica of St. Lawrence), head to some local sites on the National Register of Historic Places.

Pack a picnic and head down to the Carl Sandburg Home in Flat Rock. The Pulitzer Prize-winning poet lived on the 246-acre rural estate from 1945 until his death in 1967, producing a little more than a third of his total published work from the peaceful Flat Rock residence. There's a gorgeous lake, a quiet forest picnic area, guided tours of the home from 9:30 a.m. to 4:30 p.m., a goat farm and a series of special programs at the on-site amphitheater. Learn more at nps.gov/carl.

On the way back from Flat Rock, check out the Smith-McDowell House and Museum, just south of downtown. Built around 20 years prior to the Civil War, the four-story mansion is Asheville's oldest surviving home and the oldest brick house in the county. Check it out at 283 Victoria Road from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. Wednesday through Saturday. More information at wnchistory.org.

Another option? Venture up to Reems Creek Valley to Vance Birthplace, the historic site of Civil War officer and former North Carolina governor Zebulon Vance's birth. Open 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., Tuesday through Saturday, the five-room log house is furnished to reflect the period between 1795 and 1840. Free guided tours of the main house are offered each hour, and, on occasion, the site hosts Living History programs along with programming that features writers, artists, musicians and researchers. Check out more information at nchistoricsites.org/vance.

The artsy option: You're a regular at The Wedge. You stuff your belly at the original White Duck. You sway with the crowd at every Grey Eagle show. But how many River Arts District studios have you actually, really been to? (If you're an artist, this question doesn't count.)

One of the most fun work-days I've had in recent memory was spent with the Asheville Art Studio Tours in the River Arts District. Before you roll your eyes: This tour is developed and led by a real-life RAD artist, John Almaguer, whose glass studio is next to North Carolina Glass Center on Roberts Street. Almaguer saw a need for these tours because of how much confusion surrounds the RAD — (I once heard a tourist ask, "What time does the River Arts District close?" and realized that a lot of people aren't quite sure what the district really is).

To be honest, as a semi-local transplant and frequent patron of RAD establishments, I wasn't expecting to have as much fun on this tour as I did. But, by the end, I was so glad I signed up. Hanging out with artists in their studios, watching them paint or sculpt or blow glass and striking up conversation, gave me (and, I'm assuming, the others on the tour) a deeper appreciation for those working in the district.

Check out the RAD studio tours at ashevilleartstudiotours.com.

Find your own home-away-from-home near home

If you're really dedicated to re-discovering your hometown, book a stay in a local hostel and experience the city from a whole new vantage point.

Hear us out: It might sound silly to book a vacation in your hometown, but sometimes a change in immediate scenery is exactly what's needed to refresh your attitude on any city. Stay in a new neighborhood and see what the other side of Asheville has to offer.

Live in North Asheville? Book a room in West Asheville, at Bon Paul and Sharky's Hostel, right along the Haywood Road strip. Tired of the West Asheville funk? Check out Sweet Peas downtown — or the Asheville Hostel and Guest House on the South Slope. Or book a room in one of the many adorable, historic bed and breakfasts in Montford and North Asheville. Meet new people and explore the city from a different spot.

Tired of the city noise? Book a site at Mountain Light Sanctuary, an enchanting fairyland-of-a-hostel out in the Pisgah National Forest near Barnardsville. (Skeptical of the magic? Check out the photos yourself at mountainlightsanctuary.com.)

Pack your bags and don't worry about forgetting something — it's only a short distance away.

Treat yourself to a vacation from your staycation

When Kristen Wiig and the rest of the cast and crew came to Asheville to film the comedy "Masterminds," the actress made sure to pull all the tourist stops in town, including treating herself to a spa day at some of the local relaxation stations.

In 2014, Wiig went on The Late Show with David Letterman and told the national audience all about her "hippie" summer vacation, including meditating in a salt cave and floating in a sensory deprivation tank.

For your own "treat yourself" moment, head to the Asheville Salt Cave to experience the powers of salt therapy. Tucked into a storefront at 10-12 Eagle St. downtown, just off Biltmore Avenue, the cave is filled with 20 tons of natural salt rock and offers treatments like meditation, acupuncture and massage. Massages begin at $30 for a half-hour.

Similarly, on the south side of town, The Salt Spa of Asheville and Himalayan Salt Cave Sanctuary offers its own salty experience at 473 Hendersonville Road. For 45 minutes in the salt cave, adults will pay $35 — and for staycationing locals, special multi-session passes are available for reduced admission.

Still following the celebrity's advice, head to Still Point Wellness for a float to deprive your senses. While "sensory deprivation" may sound terrifying, it's actually the pinnacle of relaxation. Still Point's state-of-the-art Float Lab is filled with warm water mixed with 1,500 pounds of Epsom salt, allowing the body to float effortlessly above water while pulling tension out of tired muscles. After the float ($69 for an hour, $95 for 90 minutes and $119 for two hours), gently drift back to reality at the spa with a cup of tea and a soothing read.

Head outdoors

While a drive down the Blue Ridge Parkway is the most obvious of touristy things to do in town, consider exploring the Parkway like you've never explored it before. There's certainly no shortage of great hiking trails to stroll around Asheville, and, with a bit of research, you're sure to find a few new ones to add to your list.

Popular hikes in the summer usually include an opportunity or two to cool off in a stream or swimming hole, so consider adding Catawba Falls, Courthouse Falls, Skinny Dip Falls and Turtleback Falls to your checklist. A few summers back, the Citizen-Times ranked the top nine swimming holes of the region, and the list included Harper Creek Falls, Hunt Fish Falls, Chestnut Cove Branch Falls, Carolina Hemlocks, Azalea Park and Sliding Rock.

Top 9 Asheville-area swimming holes for a summer of fun

Always a popular option when the weather gets warm, try tubing, rafting or kayaking down the French Broad. Don't have your own equipment? Borrow some from French Broad Outfitters (704 Riverside Drive), Asheville Outdoor Center (521 Amboy Road), Sky Tubing (500 Lyman St.), Zen Tubing (608 Riverside Drive) or the Smoky Mountain Adventure Center (173 Amboy Road).

Now thinking of planning your own staycation? Make it an experience (and do what we did): Head to the thrift store and put together your best stereotypical outfit. (Hawaiian shirts, straw hats, gaudy beads — the works.) Really give the Asheville tourist character your all and send out a strong "I'm not local" vibe (and send us hilarious pictures).

Convince yourself you're on vacation. You deserve it.