Colt 45 is Bad, it's Nationwide

How many times have you gone on vacation and found yourself running over budget because you didn't account for the price differentials of Colt .45? Well, this is the page that seeks to solve that problem.

The G. Heileman Brewing Company has expanded its reign of Malt Liquor dominance across the nation. Its tentacles have wriggled their way from Detroit into almost every facet of American life. In an effort to more fully understand the phenomenon that is Colt .45 we have dedicated this page to the study of its relative (but not the immeasurable inherent) value at various liquor stores throughout the land. All prices refer to a 40oz bottle.

Sadly, the G. Heileman Brewing Company recently went bankrupt. However, don't be fooled into thinking that will stunt the cool flow of Colt 45 across the country. No no, with a trademark as strong as Colt 45 Malt Liquor (thanks in no small part to the credible yet incredibly smooth Billy Dee Williams) brewers from all over the globe were begging for the chance to purchase the right to continue the tradition of this proud malt liquor. The winner in this multi-billion dollar stakes poker game was none other than the Stroh's Brewing Company. Huzzah to Stroh's!

Stroh's Sells Out! On February 8, 1999 CNNfn reported that after 149 years of brewing beer, Stroh's was selling out. Stroh's sold some of its unimportant brands to Miller Brewing. But the crown jewel, Colt .45 Malt Liquor, was sold to Pabst, who obviously had the sheer financial muscle from its skyrocketing sales of Pabst Blue Ribbon. CNN estimated the value of Stroh's brewing business at $400 million. Obviously, at least 90% of this is due to the value of the Colt .45 trademark. Huzzah to Pabst!

Colt 45 Goes Mainstream! The hottest malt liquor in America is Colt 45. The hottest show in America is "The Sopranos." Is this a case of ne'er the twain shall meet? Hell no! Avid Colt 45/Sopranos fans witnessed the most brilliant marketing coupling since milk and cereal recently. An icy cold can of Colt 45 made a cameo appearance on the show, being enjoyed in Tony Soprano's home. It was a tallboy no less. Colt 45 is on the come-up! For more on this subject, consult your local library.

Location Liquor Store Price Submitted By Comments Bloomington, IN Big Red Liquors $2.99 billydee45@hotmail.com What the hell? In the last three years the price has gone up 30 cents. It's time to break some windows. Bloomington, IN Hoosier Liquors $2.69 billydee45@hotmail.com 30 cent difference per bottle? Over the course of a year, that's like a thousand dollars. Marlton, NJ Liquor Outlet $2.25 rpm Shit's cheap in New Jersey Indianapolis, IN PayLess Liquors $2.49 joel elliott When they say PayLess, they mean PayLess! St. Joseph, MI Lambercht's Liquor $2.15 russell hebets (+ .10 deposit) I'm buyin all my colt 45 in Michigan Richmond, VA ? $1.75 ellsworth stay C'mon. Nobody named 'Ellsworth' drinks Colt 45 Greenville, MS ? $1.79-$1.89 bitzero Mississippi, home of the blues and good Colt prices. Atlanta, GA ? $2.49 russell hebets It's so damn hot down here they can get away with charging so much for this shit. Maui, HI ABC Stores $4.39 frank williams Number one honeymoon destination my ass. With malt liquor prices like this, are you kidding me? Wahaiwa, HI Jesse's Market $1.99 billydee45@hotmail.com I think my man Frank got taken by the ABC Store. Polynesia unite, Boycott ABC! Do the Right Thing should have been about this situation! Louisville, KY ? $1.90 ross tucker, dirty fucker MORE FREE PORN ON CABLE! Rochester, MN ? $2.50 keith severson "upscale" liquor store, upscale prices West Lafayette, IN Village Bottle Shop $2.49 billydee45@hotmail.com I spent the better part of my youth shelling out two-fifty for forty ounces of golden elixir Akron, OH Acme Supermarket $2.49 chris sutcliff It's $2.65 at the neighborhood quick-ie mart, so buy your booze when you buy your food Bonita Beach, FL ? $1.99* billydee45@hotmail.com Colt 45 safari to the deep south turning up deep discounts (see Naples) Naples, FL 7-11 $1.86* billydee45@hotmail.com Naples Florida is bullshit. You can't find a forty of anything in that retirement town, let alone Colt 45. This price had to be pro-rated from a $1.49 32 oz. Burlington, VT ? $2.15 cam'ron Straight from the ghettos of Vermont New Albany, IN Bottle Exchange $2.19 billydee45@hotmail.com Had to brave some of the local "wildlife" to score this forty. Surprised my car was there when I came back. Stoneham, MA Rapid Liquors Goddamn! That Massachusetts State Excise Tax is helluva high! This price was apparently a fraud. Let's keep it clean, people! Woburn, MA East Woburn Package Store In Woburn, you can't drink the water 'cause it gives you leukemia, so they jack up the price of the Colt 45--I've recently learned that the East Woburn Package Store doesn't sell Colt 45, but I found the individual who requested its removal to be an idiot of the first order, so it remains. Ann Arbor, MI Village Corner $2.35 billydee45@hotmail.com Big Ten campuses equal Big Colt 45 prices. Virginia Beach, VA 7-11 $2.45 mick zed Surf, sun, and premium malt liquor. GodDAMN! Hermosa Beach, CA ? $2.95 rpm The ladies are hot and the Colt 45 is cold. Cincinnati, OH Shell $2.09 billydee45@hotmail.com Putting the "sin" back in Cincinnati. Chicago, IL 1000 Liquors $2.19 rpm You'd be surprised how hard it is to find Colt 45 in Chicago. I don't know if they really have 1000 liquors, but they had some damn cold Colt 45. Score! Carbondale, IL ? $1.69 Justin Watson That's damn cheap! Carbondale must have a lot of bums... Ottawa, Ontario Liquor Control Board of Ontario $2.80(US)* Steve A. Roughly converted from $3.90CDN, but with more favorable exchange rates, the savings on a Colt 45 trip to Canada could pay for itself. You'll note, big brother sells all the malt liquor in Ontario. Minneapolis, MN DinkyTown Wine and Spirits $2.35 Mike Olson and Justin Ruble DinkyTown? Erie, PA House of Six Packs $3.50 Adam Eckert PA is P-ricey. Them Quakers must not dig malt liquor. Wolfville, Nova Scotia (I'm guessing the Liquor Control Board of Nova Scotia...wacky Canadians) $4.95 Robert Hawley Wolfville? Sounds like a tough town. That must be why Colt 45 costs so much there; the delivery guys have to fight their way past wolves to make shipments. Maybe this price is in that Canadian play money. Lincoln, NE The "loco gro sto" $2.08 Wade Obershaw Just enough to budget out of the Mickey D's paycheck. (Incidentally, I doubt there is any place actually called the "loco gro sto" anywhere in Nebraska). Cincinnati, OH NM MiniMart $2.29 Chicknj Back in the day, I used to sell them fools for $1.05 at the drive-thru New York, New York ? $1.99 Richard Mahany If Colt 45 can make it there... Bellevue, KY The Party Source $1.89 Chicknj Apparently, the riots in the Queen city forced the good folk there into the Bluegrass State for their malt liquor. Colt 45: Increase the Peace Dayton, OH The BP station at I-75 and Edwin Moses Blvd. $1.99 Zeotch No wonder Edwin Moses could run so fast, he was runnin' for that cheap Colt 45. Cincinnati, OH Ameristop $1.99 Chicknj They be keepin the price down fo a brother to afford! Columbus, OH Andy's Carry Out $1.99 Zeotch Ohio State students need to stop rioting at keg parties and start drinking more C-45. The bottles are better to lob at the cops than the plastic cups you get at a kegger. Keep the peace, drink more C-45. Maui, HI Circle K $3.89 Chicknj Ain't too many brothers gettin' thirsty for that price. (I also like: Strange things are afoot at the Circle K) Sunset Beach, HI Foodland $1.89 Chicknj They hold the Pipeline Surfing Championships at Sunset Beach, now we know why. North Beach, HI Kammy's $2.50 Chicknj As my man Chicknj has single-handedly proven, you need to be savvy when buying Colt 45 on the islands. This web page has proven its worth. State College, PA Sharkey's Bar $2.30 ? Huh? Wha? Where? Who? Sharkey's Bar? They sell Colt 45 in a Bar? Cape Cod, MA Luke's Liquors $2.20 Shifty Goodwrench I'll let a cat named "Shifty Goodwrench" work on my vehicles any day. Burlington, VT The Exxon on Rt 7 $1.89 Rod, the 40 devouring demi-god The paper bag is free. Highland Heights, KY Bluegrass Liquors $1.79 Zeotch Props to the NKU Norse Students for fighting hard to keep the cost of living down in the Bluegrass State. Knoxville, TN The Exxon on Papermill Drive $1.19 Robert Anderson This guy got really pissed off because I didn't post this price fast enough. Have you ever smelled a papermill? That's why the Colt 45 is so cheap there.--As a follow up note, skeptical of the low price, we found all the Exxons in the Knoxville area (none were on Papermill Drive) and called them. None of them confirmed a price of $1.19, so be wary before vacationing in Knoxville based on this. Tempe, AZ Luxor Mart $1.99 Rob Bohanan I'm not sure, but I think Rob here said Colt 45 tastes like cabbage. You might need to start buying fresher cabbage, my man. Anchorage, AK The Local Brown Jug $2.99 Jason I'm having trouble paying my bills! Little Rock, AR Texaco on I-30, downtown LR $1.79 Jeff Dailey The epicenter of Colt 45 in the dirty south. Apparently, they used to sell 64 ozs. Tempe, AZ T's Liquors $1.69 Rob Bohanan Perfect temp, paper bag, friendly service. Ontario (Can) The Liquor Store in Ontario $2.55 Greg Harrington THE liquor store in Ontario? Cincinnati, OH Ohio Valley Beer Company $1.69 ChicknJ Double Malt. Double GodDAMN! Baraga, MI The Pines Convenience Store $1.99 ABC The Michigan tree huggers will make you add a deposit onto this price. Castleton, VT ? $1.94 Thomas Lee A buck ninety four? Who's running pricing over there? Winston-Salem, NC Shell $1.79 Scotty Rollo Rollo? Weren't you LaMont's buddy on Sanford & Son? Ottawa (Can) ? $4.00 Jason Embury The average pack in Ottawa costs $10, hence the massive appeal of malt liquor. Amherst, MA Russell's Liquors $2.25 Chris F-B Usually paid for in coins... St. John, New Brunswick (Can) ? $4.95 Frank H. 4.95? That's outrageous! Montreal (Can) ? $2.99 Frank H. The two dollar difference is well worth the 12 hour drive from St. John when you buy in bulk. Toronto (Can) ? $2.50* Ill Phil A fine price for a fine forty. (Converted roughly into US dollars.) Atlanta, GA Little 5 Points Liquor Store $1.99 Erock Tarkin My man Erock submitted a fine picture to illustrate how he wisely utilizes his Colt 45. Duck, NC The only supermarket in town $1.10 ? That's Goddamn right! $1.10 for 40oz! I'm only vacationing there from now on! Georgia ? $2.09 Integraty1st Georgia's a big place, my friend. Troy, NY ? $1.65 EZ Ryder Troy is the armpit of the state of New York, its residents do all the dirty work in Albany (the capital) and boasts a literacy rate of approximately 50%. Scotchtown, VA 7-11 $1.55 cam stain Scotchtown, I wouldn't want to live there, but it's a terrible place to visit... Indianapolis, IN 21st Amendment Liquors $3.79 billydee45@hotmail.com The only thing I can think of to explain this outrageously high price is that this liquor store is right down the street from a strip club. They must be trying to milk the dudes who want to get oiled up before going in and paying five bucks for a beer. Chicago, IL the corner of North and Wells $2.29 Zeotch Too drunk to remember the name of the spot Québec Métro Élite St-Antoine $3.39(can) Doom Bourré 3.39 Canadian? That's like a buck in the states! Perhaps he meant 3.39 for a can. Roxbury, MA ? $2.25 Defnasty according to Defnasty here, it was 2.25 down one street, 2.50 down the other. My question is, why would you go down the other? Lafayette, IN Bar Barry Liquors $2.35 Cory Soper Once again, Lafayette, IN representin. St. Albans, VT Maplefields $1.89 VTC_Drunk & Dillweed At that price, Ah, smells like home- like hanging back on the hood of my car and passing out in the sun. Waterville, ME Joka's Discount Beverage $2.49 Steve Beaty A small price to pay for a superior beverage, even if it means outdriving a liquor inspector Woodstock, New Brunswick Woodstock Liquor Store $4.95(CN) Peter DuPlessis You people have got to get rid of that socialized medicine. It's driving up the cost of your Colt 45. That, and stop letting the man run all your liquor stores. Nashville, IN Hoosier Buddy Liquors $2.30 billydee45@hotmail.com Hoosier Buddy? You've got to be kidding me. Forest Park, IL Discount Liquors $2.37 James Bixby Bixby? Are you related to that hulk dude? Syracuse, NY Abdo's Market $1.99 James Bixby Colt 45 is cheaper near college. Now there's a surprise. Novato, CA Save-More Liquor $2.19 res0kx64 Bay area, baby! Hollis, ME ? $2.29 Dx2 It's Christmas time in Hollis ME... Portland, ME ? $2.49 Dx2 Obviously, Portland caters to a higher class malt liquor clientele Pittsburgh, PA "local bars" $2.75 Lild4187129@cs.com So, is this supposed to mean that they sell forties in the bars there? What's the haps, yo? St. Albert, Alberta (Can) St. Albert Liquor Store $4.50(CN) cam This has to be in Canadian dollars. Even with today's economy this couldn't be greenbacks. Sherbrooke, QC (Can) All of 'em $2.99(CN) WacMan Roughly less than two bucks American. A steal! Clinton, IL Big D's Liquor Store $1.89 Captain Howdy A few of these and the girls behind the counter start to look pretty. Montreal ? $2.08(AM) Patrick The bottle shows 9% alcohol content. Does the American version match that? Cahokia, IL Cahokia Liquors $1.66 Jeremy Juenger With tax. That's value, baby. Bloomington, IL Schnuck's $1.39 Alejandro Jesus, do they even know what they're selling? Denver, CO LU Jack's Liquors $2.04 Bettwo 2.04? Is that with tax, dude? You best 'fess up and not be fucking up my numbers, sucka! Richmond, VA ? $1.79 Charlie Smigo A convenience store staple, like pork rhinds, EZ Wilders and trojans. Honolulu, HI Stop and Go $2.35 DruDown The Indian cats that run the store love us. We sell them out every month. Cape Breton Island, Nova Scotia, (Can) ? $5.00(CN) Mark MacIntyre Five fucking bucks? Even in Canadian Monopoly money that's a shitload. Edmonton, Alberta (Can) Cheerio $4.40(CN) jazzman This dude had a lot of "oi's" in his email. I thought that was Australian, like on that old energizer commercial. Lexington, KY Liberty Shell-Mart $1.89 Mike Ketterman Hell yeah! Tell how Kentucky do! Carmel, IN ? $3.00 Spencer Rich ass cracker ass crackers in Carmel trying to run out the malt liquor? Fuck 'em. Cleveland, TN Quick Check $1.29 Denny the Mouse A buck twenty nine? You making that shit up? Where the hell is Cleveland Tennessee? La Crosse, WI The Conoco on Cass $1.99 Ryan Murphy Imagine that. Beer is cheap in Wisconsin. St. Catharines, Ontario (Can) ? $3.90(CN) Tom Fritshaw With the price variances I've seen across Canada, it's a wonder some haven't tried to secede. Oh, wait. Lingleston, PA ? $4.00 Sean McGuire The competition for malt liquor was severe in this town, where Mickey's Big-mouth seemed to dominate the market. Bloomington, IN Village Pantry on 10th $1.99 Mike Klarman Everyone knows that Big Red is a ripoff. Paris, TN BP $1.69 CandyAss I'm sure the similarities between Paris, TN and the City of Lights itself are many. Stevens Point, WI ? $2.07 Lucas Kuzynsk Kuzynsk, now there's a classic Wisconsin name for you. Morrow, GA Moe's Beer, Wine & Tobacco Outlet $1.69 Tim McManus Is there a Larry's, Curly's or Shemp's? Denton, TX Midway Mart $1.82 The Shape Don't mess with that price in Texas! Memphis, TN ? $1.77 Homeboyz $1.86 after taxes. Chicago, IL Humboldt Park $2.35 E. Williams At the corner of Arbitage and California Hinesville, GA a military store $1.45 Sean Looks like my fucking tax dollars are subsidizing malt liquor purchases for our armed forces. Vancouver ? $6.10(CDN) Dirty Drew Unfuckingbelievable. Even in American Dollars that's got to be outrageous.

The National Average: $2.18 (193.85/89)

Due to the vagaries of international trade, this does not include Canadian prices unless converted to U.S. dollars

Put yourself on the map, e-mail us with the price of Colt 45 in you neck of the 'hood and see your name in lights here on the "It's Bad, it's Nationwide" page. If you send us a price for anything other than a 40oz and neglect to tell us about it, we'll come to your house and beat you down with empty forty bottles. No fair quoting a 22 price trying to create a mad rush to your hometown.