The 2018 Winter Olympics are in full swing in Pyeongchang, South Korea, and I personally have watched probably 60-plus total hours of all kinds of different Olympic sports. From downhill skiing, to curling, to skeleton — I’ve seen a whole lot. It got me to thinking: Which college football head coaches would succeed at some of the Winter Olympic sports?

Alpine Skiing

To be honest, I had some trouble coming up with a unique coach here, since you really just have to be a good, fast skier. That being said, I’ll go with Utah’s Kyle Whittingham, who makes a habit of skiing in the offseason:

And after 10 years in the sport, he sounds like he could be quite the coach himself. Ask him for advice, and it’s likely to sound like a bit of a mash-up between tackling and skiing — which is exactly how you’d expect Whittingham, a former linebacker, to ski. “The geometry of the sport is forward,” he says. “Everything forward. Hands forward. Knees forward. You don’t want to be in the backseat. That’s the biggest thing that separates the average to intermediate skier to the next level — being able to keep everything downhill. Your chest facing downhill. Keeping everything forward.” With a 73.1 mph speed mark, it’s safe to say that Whittingham is good with the geometry of the sport.

Biathalon

Mike Gundy and his mullet! In case you aren’t aware, the biathlon is the most badass sport — it combines cross country skiing with RIFLE SHOOTING. Every athlete competing in the biathlon should have a mandatory mullet to be honest.

Gundy has done his fair share of outdoorsin’ before too — look at this dang snake he wrangled in last spring:

Rattlesnake hunt in Okeene, OK with Todd and Wild Bill. pic.twitter.com/0SqWb9LxFk — Mike Gundy (@CoachGundy) March 17, 2017

Here's a second image of #OKState coach Mike Gundy's rattlesnake hunt. Wrapped around the neck! pic.twitter.com/09GWOIjawt — Mark Cooper (@mark_cooperjr) March 21, 2017

Also, West Virginia’s Dana Holgerson. Can’t you picture this man completely dominating at this?

I sure can.

“Oh God, please don’t give Dana Holgorsen a gun” -Ryan Nanni

Bobsled

Call me unconventional, but I’d love to see Mark Richt and Kirby Smart in a two-man team together, to be honest. Smart, who took Richt’s job as Georgia head coach in 2015, would make for a good brakeman, the athlete in the back of the sled who has to push it in the beginning. Richt’s calm and collected demeanor would give him an advantage as a driver.

Cross Country skiing

“You could sell me on Bronco Mendenhall in cross country skiing. about effort and earning it and no shortcuts” - Caroline Darney

Curling

Sliding a 38-44-pound stones across some ice? Sounds extremely #B1G to me. Curling may be considered “boring” to some but it requires consistency without being too flashy. Sounds a lot like Iowa football and Kirk Ferentz, to be honest.

Honorable mention — the famous ice cream eating Minnesota coach from a few years ago:

Figure skating

Michigan’s Jim Harbaugh has all the tools to be an impressive figure skater to judges — he’s expressive, is light on his feet, and isn’t afraid to make his case with officials when needed.

He moves with grace and passion too!

Jim Harbaugh plays shirtless during Prattville Camp GALLERY: http://t.co/0Br6iQ34pB pic.twitter.com/jqnWZis6pB — Albert Cesare (@AlbertCesare) June 5, 2015

Instead of actually competing, I’d love to see Washington State’s Mike Leach as a commentator. He’s no stranger to having hilarious opinions on various topics like getting married, goths, and candy corn, so him discussing what he liked and didn’t like from routines would be fantastic (not that I don’t love you, Johnny Weir!).

Snowboarding

17-year-old Red Gerard won the first gold medal for the U.S., and he didn’t hold anything back in his celebration, even dropping an obscenity when his score came down:

I’m not sure about you all, but the coach who screams fun, is laid back, and could succeed at snowboarding by being inventive and creative is FAU’s Lane Kiffin. Who wouldn’t wanna see him try this?

Kiffin probably even offered Gerard a scholarship not too long ago, given his proclivity to give offers to middle schoolers.

Ski Jumping

Richt would probably make for a good ski jumper, too — he’s got some ups!

Nordic Combined

This sport combines ski jumping with cross country skiing. Arizona State’s Herm Edwards probably has no idea what this sport is, but that hasn’t stopped him before!

Ice hockey

This is pretty much the only Winter Olympic sport where you’re allowed to be physical and crash into people, so I’d have to go with Punch Train Will Muschamp.

Not sure how Muschamp is at ice skating, but at least he wouldn’t be afraid to get physical. Penn State head coach James Franklin’s fiery demeanor would work here, too.

Short track skating

UCLA’s Chip Kelly! The Briuns’ new head coach’s offense is all about speed, and the former New Hampshire quarterback played some ice hockey in high school too!

Some coaches could convince me to try some sports, too.

Luge

Luge takes guts — after all, you’re sliding down a track made entirely of ice at incredibly fast speeds. You know who knows how to Bring Your Own Guts? Clemson’s Dabo Swinney:

Skeleton

What’s more gutsy than luge? Skeleton of course, which is essentially luge but the athlete slides down head-first, on their stomach. Yes, it’s as terrifying as it sounds.

Before tonight, all of South Korea's #WinterOlympics medals came in skating events.



"Ironman" Yun Sung-Bin just made history. https://t.co/UQAhEL5iRH pic.twitter.com/1PdMEj0NPV — NBC Olympics (@NBCOlympics) February 16, 2018

Honestly, the only head coach who could probably convince me, or anyone, that the only way to win a championship and be the best I could be for my country by doing skeleton is Alabama’s Nick Saban.

Minnesota’s P.J. Fleck swimming shirtless in ice water

This isn’t an Olympic sport, but it should be, in my opinion. As for Fleck, he can get fired up about just about anything, and he can handle the cold! He got soaked with ice water for charity four years ago while still at Western Michigan, and he handled it like a pro:

One coach who probably wouldn’t do well here is Tennessee’s Jeremy Pruitt, who once described Tuscaloosa in December as “real cold.”

Obviously this is all hypothetical, but it’d be super fun to see these head coaches try these sports away from the gridiron.

Have any other suggestions? Drop them in the comment section below.