Answer. Please don't take any notice of rumours on the bboard or anywhere else, the only accuracy will be from me, NO ONE ELSE! Its astonishing to read all the suppositions.. Rule of thumb = If it is about me and not from my mouth, then don't necessarily believe it!!

Ill address the rumours.. No, it has nothing to do with the contact lenses No, I don't have cancer (GOD FORBID!!) OK.. Here we go.. As you know I shaved off my long blonde hair AND my eyebrows to bring Zhaan to life, it was a huge sacrifice that was like a religious initiation to me. The way I justified it was to see this dedication as part of the spiritual discipline. I DID give my outward femininity up to devote my inner spirit to this beautiful and enlightened creation, "Zhaan".

Nobody but me could ever imagine what that was like, many friends and all work associates presumed that it was a simple superficial thing to do, it was an acting job requirement and that it was of absolutely no consequence whatsoever. LOL! I beg to differ. I challenge them to do the same for 3 years!! Hee Hee. Actually it was the hardest thing I've done in my life to sacrifice my human femininity permanently for years on end. And th downside is that the extensive prosthetics and little sleep caused my kidneys to overload and bleed for three years.. I simply had to go.. I was soo sick.. But there were other reasons too, not just my dwindling health..

Health issues aside.. The great news is, now I feel I've paid my dues, I have strengthened as an actress as a result of the complexities of playing "Zhaan", and I have strengthened as a person as a result of the strict discipline. I feel now I belong to the acting profession as an equal to all those who are very serious about their craft.

Yes it was difficult every day, but Zhaan was a glorious gift, a lesson and a challenge! As Zhaan grew, I grew! Zhaan was a very complicated character, not only majestically pure, beautiful and regal, but also complex in her alien reasoning and motivation. She delighted in stimulating all her senses; her spiritual sense connection, her tactile senses, her cerebral senses and magical wonder and curiosity and adoration for all things living. No wonder I am IN LOVE with her..

Of course the workload is exhausting for all of us regardless of youth, every actor is used to very long hours and little sleep, its part of the job of being a working actor.. And we love it.. But the REAL deciding factor for me was, not only loosing my "human" femininity for years on end, but the pressure and adverse physical affect of the extra long hours due to the prosthetic procedure. I was facing a crucial decision.

The crunch I am deeply in love with this mystical beauty "Zhaan" as you all know, but she was starting to overcome Virginia. Over the 3 years my body could not cope with the chemicals and was weakened,my kidneys bled ever day for 3 years, it couldn't cleanse properly due to the relentless hours and very little sleep. My "altered appearance" meant that I could not ever escape the character and get away at the end of the work day.. In our fictitious fantasy world "Zhaan" was a rare beauty, but in our human world I looked more alien out of make up than I did in it! LOL!

I approached our wonderful team of producers and writers and we tried to work out a solution. They love Zhaan as much as I do and would not EVER want to discard her, she is a great love to The Jim Henson Company and the Sci-Fi Channel. The ultimate decision was mine.

There were many options of course, but during the 6 month hiatus last year my hair started to grow and I felt alive with femininity and health for the first time in 3 years! I asked for a limited involvement and a baldcap so my hair could grow back, I agreed to keep my hair short under it to make the cap sit smoothly. My request was to reduce my involvement to say 6 or 8 episodes each season so my body could cope and heal.. I did NOT want to leave permanently.

I feel so sad for our beautiful writers and producers, they put as much of their lives and souls into Zhaan as I did, after all, they invented and built the spiritual, complex, exquisite beauty with all the complexities and magic of THEIR inner beauty, I merely stepped into what they created and added my soul..

I have much to be grateful to Farscape for. Thank you Rockne S O'Bannon, Brian Henson, David Kemper and Andrew Prowse for teaching me so much, and allowing me to breathe my soul into such a remarkable character.

I know its a long shot, but if I could be be presented as a a human looking Zhaan I would not ever leave Farscape for the rest of my life! XXXX

