To be a black Muslim woman in Toronto is to feel deep isolation, the result of omnipresent systemic anti-black, patriarchal and Islamophobic discrimination. It is to be under constant attack. To see bodies like mine ignored in the news when they suffer, when they disappear and when they die, unjustly.

Evidently some do not believe this is true. During Black History Month, I was bombarded by tweets from white men asking me to prove that racism, Islamophobia and misogyny exist. Why should I have to prove the existence of the forces that torment me and members of my community to people who don’t believe they exist and, worse, who perpetuate them? And so two months ago I tweeted, “Plz Allah give me strength not to cuss/kill these men and white folks out here today.” I put my rage and trauma into words, not action, not threat. Faced with hate, I sought restraint from god and support from my online community.

Fast forward to now. Black Lives Matter Toronto, a movement I cofounded, camped outside the police headquarters for two weeks through incredibly difficult weather conditions fighting for justice against the attack on black life in Toronto. The protest was prompted by the police shooting of Andrew Loku, a man armed only with a hammer, and the lack of transparency that followed. We have been calling for an end to anti-black racism in all institutions, from the racist practice of carding to the lack of accountability, transparency and oversight of police officers who kill black people in this city. And we got results. In two weeks, we convinced city councillors to pass a motion at city hall to investigate the lack of transparency and anti-black structures of Ontario's Special Investigations Unit. Afro-fest was restored to two days. And Premier Kathleen Wynne committed to having a public meeting with us.

As the movement gained traction, I became increasingly visible and increasingly the target of those who oppose our cause. Jerry Agar, a Toronto Sun columnist with a long, well-documented record of enmity to our anti-racist goals, attempted to use my visibility to discredit me. A day after the conclusion of #BLMTOtentcity, he cited the aforementioned tweet in an attempt to delegitimize an entire movement, and to position my community as undeserving of justice.

I am not a public official. I am not a police officer. The state does not entrust me with violent weaponry. I have never contributed to the mass targeting of a community. All I have done is used a turn of phrase, a rhetorical flourish, to voice my frustration and dared to be a person calling for justice.

To date, I have directly received many disturbing death threats from white supremacists across the country. Somehow a tweet I wrote out of anger months before our protest began has become a bigger media story than our protest’s many and profound accomplishments. The noise surrounding this tweet has also drowned out the discussion we sought to spark about the black lives of those who have died at the guns of police in this country. Journalists have incessantly harassed me, desperate to get a comment on the tweet. Where were they during the entire two weeks of #BLMTOtentcity? The media is part and parcel of how anti-black racism works. Too often black people are ignored or vilified when we speak the truth about our condition.

To be black in Toronto is to have been or know somebody who has been brutalized, violated or battered by the Toronto police. Our lives are plagued by institutional and individual anti-black racism that compromises our access to safety, economic freedom, proper health care, food, housing, employment, education and culturally restorative support services. To be black in this city is to fight to survive.

Mayor John Tory responded to reports of my tweet less than 24 hours after they emerged. Yet for the more than two weeks black people fought for our humanity in protest outside of police headquarters, he ignored us. That is something everyone in this city should be concerned about. Despite all the violence we endure when we resist, we can never lose sight of the issues; we must continue to seek justice and accountability for our community. We only have more work to do, and this is only the beginning. Black lives matter, here as everywhere, and they always will.

Yusra Khogali, co-founder of Black Lives Matter Toronto, is a community organizer, anti-racism educator and black feminist poet. She is also a graduate student at the University of Toronto pursuing a master’s in Social Justice Education.

Correction - April 19, 2016: This article was edited from a previous version that mistakenly referred to the Toronto Police's Special Investigations Unit. In fact, the SIU is an independent arm’s length agency of the Ontario government.

