Anonymous 09/21/20 (Mon) 07:48:02 AM No. 152135



>When a man comes on strong in stage one (attraction) and then pulls back in stage two (uncertainty), a woman sometimes feels pressure to give back sexually. She has received so much that she feels obligated to return the favor. She hopes that by responding in a sexual manner and fulfilling his desires, she will regain his interest. By giving more of herself than she is ready to give, however, she can actually sabotage a relationship. More is not always better.



>A woman needs to understand that by receiving and responding in a warm and friendly way to a man's romantic gestures she is already giving back to him. This basic understanding is crucial, and women today are missing it. Quite often a woman feels that she is not giving enough in return, and then she feels obligated to give more.



>If a woman's reaction to uncertainty is to pursue a man, it can actually prevent him from moving through his uncertainty to discover whether he wants to invest in a relationship or not. This is why, traditionally, woman don't call men. The wise woman waits for him to pursue her.



>Young women, particularly, feel a pressure not to let a man pay on a date so that they don't feel obligated to have sex. This is the woman's way of saying that he should not get his hopes up. The problem with this approach is that he will get the idea that she is not receptive at all and lose interest. Just because a woman enjoys a man's gifts does not in any way obligate her to give more than a smile or a thank you.

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So I've been having some dating woes, and my mom gave me this old book she bought when she was young called Mars and Venus on a Date. It's by a dude called John Gray, who is a famous author in the relationship category. The book itself is obviously a bit dated since it was published in 1997, but it's actually incredible how so much of the book preaches what FDS seems to. I mean, here are some snippets that stood out to me (these are specific to dating with the goal of a relationship of course, not causal sex):Now I haven't tried FDS (or any kind of dating strategy really), but I've heard of it and the premise, and it just really stood out to me that this book written over 20 years ago by an 'expert' in the dating field - and a man - also emphasises so much that woman should allow themselves to be pursued. That the role of