Getty Images Getty Images

Getty Images Getty Images

Ben Stiller in "There's Something About Mary," you are not alone.

According to data culled by the University of California, San Francisco, there are an average of 2,000 zipper-related penis injuries each year, representing a hefty one-fifth of all penile trauma and accounting for most genital-related trauma in general. Um, ouch.

And, how traumatic such an experience must be. Seriously, could you even imagine getting your labia caught between those metal teeth? We would die. Guys, if we were you, we would 1) never go commando ever again and 2) invest in some button fly pants...STAT!

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