Beware, parents! The Beastie Boys don't do concerts; they do orgies.

This band performs sexual acts on stage. At a recent concert in Columbus, Ohio, the members of this rock band reportedly took turns kissing the naked breast of the "crafty girl in the cage" -- a bikini-clad girl dancing in a cage.

This show is coming to the Capital Centre on April 5. WAVA, a suburban radio station, is sponsoring a contest to choose a Washington-area "crafty girl in the cage." Are concert attendees going to witness the same repulsive act in our nation's capital?

King Ad-Rock, one of the Boys, has been quoted as saying that the band only wants to bring a little "fun" into the lives of all the 13-year-old girls who buy their records. It's a fact that the band's audience is made up primarily of junior high school youth.

The Beastie Boys' message is about violence, drugs, alcohol and sex, and it is totally negative. The band's drugs of choice (mentioned frequently in their songs) are "a cold brew," "sniffing glue," "Angel dust" and "crack."

Let me quote from their current best-selling album, "Licensed to Ill," the song "Hold It Now, Hit It": "Well, I'm cruisin', I'm bruisin', I'm never losin'. I'm in my car, I'm going far, and dust is what I'm usin'. . . . I'm a killer at large and I'm on the loose. Pistol packin', Monkey drinkin' . . . . I'll take no slack 'cause I got the knack. I'm never dusting out 'cause I trust that crack."

Parents across the country are outraged by their recent concerts. In Memphis, the Beastie Boys used a giant inflatable penis during their song "Fight for Your Right (to Party)." It was referred to as a show stopper.

In Columbus, Ga., according to local news reports, the Boys invited girls from the audience to bare their breasts and to have sex with members of their road crew. While the Beasties sang their anthem, "Fight for Your Right," they altered the lyrics to refer to oral sex. Again, they used their inflatable stage prop. The T-shirts hawked to the young audience carried an obscene slogan. That same slogan appears on the record itself.

As a result of this concert, one station in Columbus, Ga., WNKS-FM, banned Beastie Boys music.

The Columbus chief of police, Jim Wetherington, was quoted as saying, "The Beastie Boys rap music trio should have been arrested and charged with indecent exposure or disorderly conduct after their controversial concert at the Columbus Municipal Auditorium Saturday night." He added, "I'm really disappointed that we didn't charge the people who should have been charged, and we will the next time. . . ."

One local politician in Columbus is sponsoring an ordinance "to make it illegal for anything like this to happen again and also to make the promoter responsible."

How far are bands and promoters going to stoop? How much lewd material are we going to allow bands such as this to perform on stage?

It's time the Washington community and communities across the country were served in a responsible manner by the media with concert descriptions. I would like to see concerts such as these judged pornographic; there should be ratings and even age restrictions. But if parents were only forewarned, that would be a step in the right direction. At least then we could boycott perverted groups such as this.

These Beastie Boys present themselves as innocent little teen-agers with their short hair, baseball caps, hi-top sneakers, flowered shorts, T-shirts and skate boards.

But they are far from innocent. -- V. H. Myers