Some corners of the Fiat Chrysler offices must operate exclusively on nostalgia. And certain corners of those corners must not remember said nostalgia all that well. To prove my point, here's the 2019 Ram 1500 Classic Warlock.

The original Warlock debuted in 1976, marketed under the not-gonna-happen-in-2019 tagline of "Adult Toys" (seriously). Originally conceived as a sort of concept truck for the road, it packed personalization like bucket seats, "fat tires," chrome on the running boards, real oak on the sideboards and gold accent stripes. That all sounds pretty cool, right?

So let's take a look at this new one. First of all, its base is pretty much the opposite of the original idea of a road-going concept, because the Ram 1500 Classic is the ­last­-generation truck. This new Warlock gets the beefier grille from the Rebel, powder-coated bumpers, black wheels and wheel flares, a 1-inch lift kit, black badges, unique Warlock decals and an optional Sport hood.

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Does it have fat tires? No. Does it have chrome? No. Real wood? Nope, not even inside. Gold accent stripes? I think you get where this is going. Hell, bucket seats aren't even a requirement, since you can get it with a bench. The original Warlock, as far as I can tell, didn't have the word "Warlock" anywhere on the exterior, either. It's like this new Warlock is the result of a game of telephone that started when the original Warlock went on sale.

Ram

If there's one thing the Ram 1500 Classic Warlock has going for it, it's value... sort of. For $35,345 (not including $1,695 for destination), you get all the aforementioned standard exterior gussying-up, in addition to a leather-wrapped steering wheel, LED bed lighting, power-folding mirrors and a 7-inch cluster display.

But even that's not perfect, because you'll still have to shell out more to get heated seats, a spray-in bedliner or the excellent 8.4-inch Uconnect infotainment system. A V6 with rear-wheel drive is standard, and you'll have to pay even more to move up to a Hemi V8 or four-wheel drive.

There's still a good bit of demand for the Ram 1500 Classic, which is why they're still building it, and this one offers some decent options at a decent price. But if you're buying it because you miss the old Warlock, this new one is probably just going to result in you missing the old one more.

Ram 1500: Here's the one you want.

Jeep Gladiator: This is also cooler than what you just read about.