Kyle Escobar-Humphries made it a point to attend mass Saturday morning at St. John The Evangelist Catholic Church.

Located in the heart of Hillcrest, the historic epicenter of the gay community in San Diego, St. John’s hosted a special service aimed at reaching out to LGBT members, their families and friends.

Escobar-Humphries is gay and has been married for nearly three years to another man, Snapper Escobar-Humphries. Together they sat near the front of the church with their 8- and 9-year-old children as Auxiliary Bishop John Dolan of the Roman Catholic Diocese of San Diego celebrated mass before a crowd of about 300.

“It’s important because my kids have two gay dads and I would like for them to understand that this church is open for everybody,” said the 46-year-old, who said he is a lifelong Catholic. “I want them to understand how to treat each other equally.”


The service commemorated the 20th anniversary of a document released by the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops called “Always Our Children” that offered “an outstretched hand” to parents and family members of gay Catholics.

Accompanied by San Diego Bishop Robert McElroy and priests from around the area, Dolan underscored the pastoral message released in 1997.

“To you parents, there is no denying your own sons and daughters, whatever their walk in life,” Dolan said during his homily.

Just before mass, Dolan said: “This parish falls within the Hillcrest district and there are a number of people in our community here who want to participate in the life of the church, and we want to make sure they have a welcome home in some fashion here within the church.”


McElroy said the diocese is making an effort to reach out to LGBT members at parishes across the San Diego area, but the mass Saturday amplified something larger.

“Pope Francis is calling us to reach out to everyone with a message of radical inclusion,” McElroy said. “Sadly, there has been an estrangement and an alienation with LGBT people, and the Church needs to take steps to heal that.”

Since becoming pope in 2013, Francis has not made major changes to the Catholic Church’s doctrine against homosexual acts but made headlines when, early in his papacy, he said, “If a person is gay and seeks God and has good will, who am I to judge?”

Richard Peterson, 26, is a gay parishioner at St. John’s who volunteers with the church’s LGBT ministry.


Richard Peterson lights altar candles prior to an “Always Our Children” mass Saturday at St. John the Evangelist Catholic Church in Hillcrest. (Nancee E. Lewis /)

Although Peterson said he’s never had a “large crisis of faith,” he acknowledged that many in the gay community have problems with Roman Catholic leadership.

“The church is made of humans and humans are not perfect,” Peterson said. “I think at the core of it you have to look at what the church stands for, which is love and mercy and forgiveness and community. That’s what this parish is trying to do here.”

But while the church gets criticism for not moving fast enough on sexual and cultural issues, it also gets grief from some on the opposite end.


A group of about a half-dozen gathered outside St. John’s, handing out literature criticizing Saturday’s service.

“We’re criticizing the church for modernism,” said Allyson Smith, a Catholic from El Cajon who called the “Always Our Children” pastoral message “a flawed document that had to be revised” the following year.

“The church is bending with the cultural zeitgeist. The church is bending with the times and with the pervasiveness of homosexual activism throughout the country and indeed the globe,” Smith said. “And we feel the Church should stand strong as a bulwark against cultural trends … Our concern today is the Church is becoming too accommodating to homosexuality.”

Bishop McElroy said he understands the criticism the church receives from a variety of sources.


“Our founder was Jesus Christ. Jesus took it from all sides,” McElroy said. “And even if we’re doing things right — and I’m not saying we are doing all things right, we’ve got things to learn about this — but even when we’re doing it right, it’s not a bad sign if you’re getting it from all sides.”

Emily Reimer-Barry, an associate professor and theologian at the University of San Diego, attended Saturday’s mass and called it “beautiful and empowering.”

“I think anyone who doesn’t wrestle with their faith is not a thinking person,” said Reimer-Barry, who is heterosexual, married with two children and Catholic. “It’s not an easy process. But I also have faith that God is there in the messiness … An event like today’s is a time when the community gathers to support each other and say, yes, we are all in this together.”


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