This September … they aren’t shucking around.

As you might remember, local PBS affiliate Thirteen released some hilarious subway posters for fake reality shows (we could only hope that The Dillionaires, Bad Bad Bag Boys, and Knitting Wars actually existed) back in May. Their motive? They wanted people to stop and realize the current state of television and support quality programming at thirteen.org.

Well, they’re at it again, producing TV ad spots for three “new” reality shows:Meet the Tanners, Long Island Landscapers and Clam Kings. Upon viewing, it’s difficult not to imagine these clips as actual programs — Meet the Tanners has TLC/ The Style Network written all over it, Long Island Landscapers seems like a fit on Bravo and Clam Kings could find a home on The History Channel — precisely Thirteen’s point.

Thirteen’s marketing plan is pretty genius, but I really wish that these shows could exist — even as parodies. Come on, Clam Kings looks riveting! The spots will run on USA, TVLand, NY1 as well as Thirteen, WLIW and NJTV but you can always check out the trailers below:

Meet the Tanners — “I think that the ability to tan is something that you’re born with.”

Long Island Landscapers — “This is Long Island, not Florida.”