While scientists are still devising a way for streams of nitrous oxide to somehow be emitted through fiber-optic cable, ABC has come up with the next best way to improve its people-falling-down-a-lot game show Wipeout: encasing the whole thing in ice. The newly winterized version of the summer hit will debut this January, adding new obstacles with self-explanatory names like “Spanker Sleds,” “Wipeout Ski Lift,” and “Polar Bear Run” (okay, that one isn’t self-explanatory, unless it involves getting mauled by polar bears), as well as dip its big, signature balls in sleet and snow for a wintry mix that’s sort of like Doctor Zhivago meets Jackass. No more mid-winter contemplation for you, Robert Frost.

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