I’m not a very popular writer. It pleases me to say that this site, Halsey News, is picking up more and more traffic. Though you can see from my lack of comments, nobody really reads my shit. And that’s okay. What do you call that skinny nerd in karate class? The starting point! And with that, my few sporadic friends, I’m going to start a series here: The Catch-22 of Being White.

I was actually going to write a book. Though two problems with that approach:

My previous book barely sold over 150 copies and I ended up giving as many away for free. My site on which I was selling the book got attacked. So I’d just as soon make this a series; give me a reason to write here.

Anyway, in researching for this book, I found over 50 instances where the catch-22 of being white is very real. Basically, if you’re white, you’re f*cked in the social sphere. You’re a racist, no matter how you carry it.

Before we dig in, understand that this is a juxtaposition of the only two colors that have ever seemed to matter in America: Black and white. So the catch-22 of being white series is dealing with white and black people, though many of these examples work for all POC.

The Catch-22 of Being White: Five Examples of Perpetual White Miseducation

1: Cultural Bias in Schools

One of the biggest black talking points you hear is that white people used to keep them from reading! It’s told to us as if every single white person in America kept every single black from reading. That’s the sort of guilt thrown angrily at our feet. So while only a handful of schools in this nation were segregated, blacks carry it as if we’ve always held them back in education.

So, today, what we have are public schools that cater to everyone. You’re black? Come on in! And we end up with blacks who fail and drop out at rates far higher than whites

Black people claim it’s cultural bias. What this means, in a nutshell, is that blacks make the claim that their culture is wholly different from white culture. They cannot be expected to learn math and science because these things are inventions of whites and thus promote white supremacy. So we tried to teach blacks just like whites, equality, since they demanded to be let into white schools, but it’s not good enough. They still demand a lower bar.

Though here’s where the catch-22 of being white comes into play: White supervisory boards either lower the bar for black students (social promotion, easier materials, free SAT points, etc) or we allow black-headed school districts to do the same. It’s blacks themselves calling the shots. Though when they fail, drop out, and leave school under-educated and unable to compete with their non-black peers, it’s somehow still white people’s fault.

We didn’t fund their schools enough, even though they’re better funded. We didn’t teach them the right stuff, even though we tried and they told us that they were different culturally so had to learn differently.

Whatever we do, it’s a catch-22 for whites, with blacks in public schools. We cannot win. We give them the keys to their own castles, they f*ck it up, and we still take the blame. It’s those damn white devils!

2: Letting Blacks Into College

It doesn’t just stop with primary schools. We see this same shit in “higher education” too. Blacks receive an average of over 200 free SAT points, and obviously there are diversity quotas in colleges. Every time we’re told that they don’t exist, we have some story breaking about how colleges overlook Asian and white students to put in black students.

Hell, make sense of this for me:

Black women are far and away leading the charge at being single mothers in society who suck at the welfare teat, per capita

Black women are also far and away leading the charge of demographics enrolled in college

How do those two wash? Women whose life preferences seem to include, per the data available, having babies and getting on welfare; yet they’re the number-one demographic represented in all American higher education.

But here’s the catch-22 of being white: Schools headed primarily by white people, whose historical enrollment has been mostly white, are making special exemptions to allow black students in for literally no other reason than being black students. These students aren’t becoming engineers and mathematicians and scientists. They’re mostly majoring in African-American Studies and other sorts of softball courses.. Yet we’re told that A) Not enough blacks are being let into schools; and B) These schools don’t do enough for black students.

So we let blacks into college without earning it like other demographics have to, and it’s still not good enough for them. They literally want colleges to be a home environment (which makes sense, seeing as there aren’t any fathers in college either). They hold entire universities hostage and demand more and more black faculty and even easier courses because black college retention rates are the lowest in the nation, despite blacks flooding into college at the highest proportions.

We give them what they want. Instead of using it as a platform for earning their way in life, we’re blamed for not making it even easier. Basically, blacks are demanding participation trophies from white America. Give us a free ride through school, kindergarten through a college degree, without forcing us to learn things from your culture, and then when we get out, we want to magically be equal within your culture. Equal to the people who worked hard and earned it.

3: Microaggressions

Yes, this is an education themed article mostly. Though what we see in the collegiate environment especially is black people who, without fail or exception, label white people as racist no matter what they do. If, for instance, white people do not associate with blacks, they’re racists because they’re ignoring black people. Though if white people do associate with blacks, they’re somehow just doing it to assuage their own racism, and they end up somehow treating blacks as differently by attempting to treat them the same.

Here’s the catch-22 of being white when it comes to microaggressions.

One of the biggest, most-used microaggressions today is that white people saying “I don’t see color” is a way to whitewash blacks. If you say you do not see a black person as a black person, you are not recognizing their history, their oppression, their supposed countless contributions to the world. If you’re not seeing them as black, you’re seeing them as white, and this makes you a racist, you white devil piece of shit!

Just try being the white person saying you see a black person as a black person! You might literally be charged with a hate crime! Even if you call a black person black, when they want to be called African-American, you’re in for a world of shit. These people will protest and shut down entire universities saying that racism is rampant on campus, because one white guy said something that one black person intentionally decided was offensive enough to make them famous – Kang for a day.

The same catch-22 applies to asking a black person where they’re from, as it “others” them and supposedly assumes they don’t belong in your country. Meanwhile, assuming they’re from America is also bigoted, because Africa is the cradle of all civilization according to them, and denying Africans their heritage and rightful respect is racism.

All microaggressions are a catch-22. We don’t need to belabor the point here. You get it.

4: Speaking For One’s Race

This one most certainly isn’t all about education, though we can primarily find this one today on campuses. It basically goes like this: “White privilege is the ability to be white and not expected to speak for your entire race!” And what they mean here is that when there’s a “black” issue or a topic involving black people, a black person will be asked to weigh in. Why is this considered racist? Because it’s another opportunity to play victim and blame whites for something. Though it’s another classic catch-22.

The catch-22 of being white for speaking for one’s race is thus:

Say there’s an issue on a campus about a black student union wanting to create easier courses that blacks can pass so that their retention rates improve (read: so blacks can get a participation trophy and pretend to be educated, when in reality they’re using this useless diploma as a hammer to beat up on white people by saying they should be super, duper rich now because they’re eddumacated). To hear the “black” side of it, a black member of that student union will be asked to speak for it. Well, this is racist, you evil white devil, because you’re asking a black person to speak for their entire race. (Never mind that black people are the ones who literally claim there’s a proper way to be “black.”)

Say you don’t feel like being called racist and risking being accused of stereotyping blacks, so you get a white person from school to give their take on it. Well, white devil, welcome to the catch-22 of being white! That’s also racist. According to blacks, no white person can know what it’s like to be black, because of their lived experiences – that are collectively all identical when they need them to be, yet diverse when they need to still call you a racist for stereotyping them.

It’s all a big f*cking joke.

5: Halloween Costumes

Okay, this one is apropos for the time of the year, and definitely something we see happening on college campuses a lot. Though to be fair, this one is a lot more about hypocrisy than a catch-22. But I would still classify it as a catch-22 in the context of “culture” only being considered as something a nonwhite can have.

So the catch-22 of being white for Halloween costumes goes like this:

White Europeans created a holiday that their descendants allow all people of all races to celebrate, because white people don’t often run around playing the victim. Today’s commercialized version of the holiday sees people dress up in myriad ways, portraying caricatures and specific characters. Though if you’re white and dressing up as anyone from black culture, you are a racist for culturally appropriating black culture. This means that their culture is so important and significant to them that it belongs to them, and only them, and you’re a racist for daring to disrespect it!

Though in the same breath, blacks never even consider that this objectively isn’t their Holiday. It wasn’t started in Africa. It was started in Europe. It’s a white holiday, by and for white people. That’s one. Two, blacks can dress up as any white character they deem fit. The real kicker, however, is that you’re racist both ways. Dress how they demand you’re not allowed to dress? Racist! Point out it’s not their holiday so they shouldn’t make demands? Still racist! In fact, it’s getting to the point that come late September, blacks line up for miles to preemptively shout that whites are going to be racist this Halloween, so they gotta call it out, all while never once, not a single time, admitting that it’s not their f*cking holiday! It’s ours.

Part one of my Catch-22 Of Being White series here dealt with issues you’ll find in schools and on college campuses mainly. Though to be sure, I have dozens upon dozens of other examples of this, and I’m going to fill this series out with at least ten articles in total.

This is just the first. If you enjoyed it, great. If you think it’s racist and want to disagree, I look forward to you telling me where the lie is at. All of this information is demonstrably objective. If you’re white, you exist in a catch-22, a perpetual social prison wherein you are racist, privileged sum.

It’s time to fight back!