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In one sense it’s a shame that Arthur Miller chose to chronicle the Salem witch trials as his artistic response to McCarthyism; The Crucible did much to leave us with the label of ‘witch hunt’ in circumstances where it absolutely does not apply.

‘You... don’t want it to lead to a witch hunt atmosphere, a Salem atmosphere, where every guy in an office who winks at a woman is suddenly having to call a lawyer to defend himself,’ was Woody Allen’s foolish conflation of flirtation and the allegations against Harvey Weinstein. ‘Witch hunt’ is a sadly ironic label, given the sexist nature of the hysteria that led to executions in Massachusetts.

It’s also daft when applied to any situation in which there is real wrongdoing, as is being exposed by the #MeToo movement. With respect to Neopagans, I’m certain that witchcraft has never been observed, whereas women have been right to speak out. I know this, because I was publicly shamed in the early days of #MeToo following the Weinstein story.

When a woman spoke out about her discomfort at my attempt to kiss her years ago outside a bar, I was shocked. My recollection differs in some respects, but I understand now that what I did upset her.

A number of women described on social media how I had behaved towards them. I apologised publicly, and I stand by my apology: I propositioned women and made them feel uncomfortable through my inappropriate behaviour.

When a woman spoke out about her discomfort at my attempt to kiss her years ago outside a bar, I was shocked. I understand now that what I did upset her

I have engaged in serious, professionally led work to ensure that my misjudgments are a relic of the past. I make no excuses for my misconduct, nor do I seek to diminish the seriousness of anyone’s experience.

Not everything I have read about myself has been accurate, but as a consequence of women coming forward to describe how I have behaved and how they felt, I have been presented with the opportunity to re-assess incidents in my past. This has led me to ask searching questions of my character. I have written for the past decade. After women spoke out, the magazine GQ terminated its contract with me.

But what matters now are the stories of the women compelled to speak out around the world. I am deeply reluctant to say anything about my experience, and I seek no sympathy. In a significant sense I respect why this has happened: If you’re starting a fire, you have to crack some branches.

We do not live in a world where women receive equal treatment. The push to end the era in which male MPs put their hands up skirts, movie producers drag women into their hotel suites and actors make their production staff feel unsafe was always going to be a movement that killed a few admirals. That’s the price of revolution, and I have sympathy for those who agree that it is a price worth paying.

Women are rightly fed up with the cumulative effect of treatment that falls short of equal respect. The key lesson is an old but fundamental one — the golden rule. We can and will bring about a vastly improved society if we focus on treating each other just the way that we would like to be treated ourselves. I have sometimes failed to do that in my private life, and I’m doing my level best to make sure that I do not fail again.

Two men have now died in the UK as a consequence of allegations about their private lives. It would be wrong to over-simplify or generalise about the deaths of the late Carl Sargeant and a Labour staff member who had been suspended from his job, but their deaths cannot be ignored.

I am not at all comfortable admitting this publicly, but when my life became the focus of social media and news interest, it was an overwhelming experience. I want to express my gratitude to the Samaritans, and a woman whose name I don’t know who volunteers for them and answered a telephone call from me. Beyond public expression of thanks I have no other hope of reaching out to her.

If you ever find yourself questioning what — if anything — you have to live for, I would encourage you to call them. It is painful for me to admit this, but is no overstatement to say that a few close friends and the careful patience of that volunteer who offered to stay with me on the phone brought me back from the edge.

None of this is easy to talk about, and I have always been a relatively private person, but the magnitude of the response, the intensity of the media, the ongoing fury of the internet, and the loss of a job I loved have left a permanent impact. I am appalled by the hostility with which women speaking out have been received, and the way in which they are abused for sharing their experiences and feelings horrifies me. It is just as important that we extend a presumption of good faith to those speaking out as it is to maintain the presumption of innocence of criminal wrongdoing for those accused.

It’s striking that the press was so quick to move the focus away from journalism and on to Westminster. Many of my peers will know stories about colourful broadcasters, prominent writers or commissioning editors who drop freelance women who don’t reciprocate their feelings.

The upper echelons of journalism still look the same, and it matters that there is a change, because the reporting of these stories has a serious impact on where society goes from here. Media organisations focusing on the sexuality of Kevin Spacey and writers paid to produce hit jobs on women who speak out are just two examples of why it matters that — whatever the failings of social media — traditional media has not paid itself the scrutiny that it deserves.

On one level I am grateful for how this event has forced me to ask questions about myself. As my mother often used to say to me, if you’re not part of the solution then you’re part of the problem. I was part of the problem.

If you are reading this and questioning whether you have always been respectful towards others, and if you want to talk to someone about how you might start trying to change, then please do get in touch. Too much of the emotional labour has been undertaken by women.

If this moment is to be a pivot towards a more equal future, it is just as crucial that men do what they can to support women as it is that women accept those willing to help. Just as the climate has to be one in which women feel able to come forward with their experiences, so too must it be one in which we accept, embrace and encourage the willingness of individuals to change.

The fee for this article has been donated to The Samaritans.