Excuse me while I hyperventilate over Blindspot. Season 2 Episode 9 “Why Let Cooler Pasture Deform” covers a lot of ground, ties up some loose ends, and gives us some great character development.

Of course, it’s also the fall finale, so it leaves us with our jaws on the floor.

For me, this episode is unique, because for just about every good thing that happens in this episode there’s also something that made me want to fall to my knees and ask:

Emotional rollercoaster aside, here are some of the best and worst moments from this episode.

BEST: Borden Makes Patterson Breakfast in Bed

Okay, let’s be honest, I can’t help but crush on Dr. Bordon. He is sweet, charming, he cooks, and most of all, he just seems like a good guy.

So when he brings Patterson breakfast in bed, complete with a cute story, and a humble brag about being in Doctors Without Borders, I practically melted.

I’ve shipped these two together a lot this season, so this fluffy moment was both the perfect way to kick off an action-packed episode and at the same time so foreboding of things to come we should have seen it a mile away. Actually, we did, but we didn’t want it to be true.

WORST: Borden is the Mole

This reveal has been a favorite prediction, and the lead ups to it are so obvious that it almost fell flat. As much as this brings intrigue to Borden’s character, the person I really feel for in this moment is Patterson.

Things can’t go well for Patterson as far as love is concerned. Her previous love interest died after getting too involved with her work, and now her newest love interest is a mole.

We have to give Ashley Johnson props for her performance in the scene where she finally puts together what’s going on.

Come on Borden, you know that taking that ring out wasn’t a smart idea. At least lock your door.

BEST: Finding out Borden’s Backstory

I have been dying to get at the heart of what happened to Jane in Afghanistan in 2013, and we got a little peek at that this week. Inserted between the reveal and more Sandstorm intrigue, we get this captivating backstory about an injured Jane and Borden and his wife, Chris, nursing her back to health.

It ties in the ring and the woman from a few episodes ago, and we also see Borden’s recruitment into Sandstorm. It’s a bit of a diversion from the main storyline but it is very much needed.

Still, I don’t feel like I have enough of the story to shape Sandstorm’s plan. All I can really say is that the segment and montage paid off with a recruitment speech that would have had me sign on.

Plus, it was perfectly timed for the events of this past week and I get the feeling the sound byte may become some Blindspotters motivation.

WORST: Shepherd Tortures Jane

Look up dysfunctional family in the dictionary and you will see a picture of Sheperd, Roman and Remy, We finally see the consequences of the note that outed Jane as loyal to the FBI. The retribution involved drugged gum, staging an explosion to take out the team (although they spare Weller, hmmmmm), and making Jane watch via a projection.

So, is it similar to the torture that the CIA black site was using in the season premiere: no. This is torture on a psychological level. Doesn’t mean it didn’t make us squirm.

The highlight of this whole montage is when Shepherd announces that Roman is going to kill Jane. Roman was so unhappy with that development, and rightfully so.

Which brings me to the diametrically opposed best moment.

BEST: Epic Roman/Jane/Shepherd Fight Scene

Talk about turning a negative into a positive. The scene that starts with Jane tied to a chair breaks into a fight scene. There’s even a cool move where Jane breaks herself out of the chair and joins Roman in hand-to-hand combat with Mama Shepherd.

The scene is riveting, even when Roman shoots Shepherd but leaves her alive. Michelle Hurd’s performance is outstanding in this scene. For a moment I was worried this would be the last we’d be seeing of her, but when Jane talks Roman down, I took a breath.

Clearly Shepherd is just too strong and devious to go anywhere just yet.

BEST: Reade Comes Clean

Despite all my dislike for their handling of the knife situation last episode, Reade and Zapata are two of my favorite characters and I celebrate their friendship and bromance.

Listening to Reade come clean when Zapata while he’s being prepped for surgery is heartbreaking, but I think the best was how casually Reade throws out his love for Tasha and thanks her for believing that he didn’t kill Coach Jones.

Dude, you better not die.

BEST: Jane Injects Roman with ZIP

The second that Roman was introduced, I loved the idea of Jane having a blood relative she could be tied to. I wanted to see them grow together and I looked forward to a season of Jane playing both sides.

Of course, this all ends when they went to a medical facility and Jane injects Roman with ZIP to erase his memory.

I don’t know exactly how ZIP works in small doses–remember, Jane’s system was saturated with it–but I can imagine that this is going to make for a very interesting winter and spring season.

They aren’t going to rename Roman and call him John Doe now, are they?

WORST: The Final Scene

The fight between Borden and Patterson throughout his apartment is hands down one of the best scenes of the episode, but it ends in the worst way.

I am torn on how to categorize this, because honestly, it was shot really well, but it left me with my jaw on the floor at the very end.

The struggle over the gun was very effective. We don’t see the gun go off and we’re so focused on their faces that we don’t even realize that the trigger’s been pulled until the last moment. So while it’s dynamic it also has me saying: “Really! I have to wait until January now?”

What did you think of this episode of Blindspot? Share your thoughts in the comments below!

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Blindspot airs Wednesdays at 8/7c on NBC, and will return January 4th.

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