Limerick List

Thanks for all the submissions - here are just some of our favourites.

(Tell us which you like best at this poll)

1



There once was a caveman named Brady

Who said, “Maryland’s flag drives me crazy!”

“I think it’s okay,”

Said the robot called Grey,

“It’s so bad that it might just amaze me.”

2

There once was a doctor called Brady,

(this one was a man; not a lady)

He may be the cleverest

To have visited Everest,

Though Grey finds that claim rather shady!

3

Hello Internet held an election,

For a flag worthy of our affection,

We chose nail and gear,

The loyal Tims cheer,

Flaggy flag rebels cry "insurrection!"

4

On a quest for a great pseudonym,

Dr Haran went out on a limb,

Made of metal and wheels,

His friend also feels,

The best listeners should all be called Tim

5

There once was a robot called Grey

And you might find it odd when I say

Though he loved automation,

flags and education

He always led Brady astray

6

My day had been fairly mundane

When HI started up in my brain.

So I jumped to my feet,

thought: “I must send a tweet!”

“@bradyharan - I’m not on a plane.”

7

They may both have a passion for flagging

And some freebooting had their hearts sagging

ut when they asked around

They surprisingly found

That they're known for the term humblebragging

8

Brady was brushing his teeth

With a toothbrush with bristles of heath

A crack interrupted

And splinters erupted

And his mouth did resemble a wreath

9

I am sorry I've been such a grump

To be honest I feel like a chump

But I hope you can see

that it's not you, it's me

I'm in love with the Mighty Black Stump

10

Brady takes this ridiculous show

To places it never should go

From swamp hens to rice rats

And cricketers' nice bats

Grey's always the last one to know

11

I have a message for Grey

I want him to see what I say

But I know he won't read it

He'll simply delete it

But Brady might send it his way...

12

Brady's biggest fan is a duck,

Who finds himself bang out of luck,

You're reading this Grey,

As Brady can't say

The Limerick ending with f**k.

13

Grey we hope you will never be parted,

From your cohost, an imp but kindhearted.

And we know you don't like

Brady touching his mic

But at least he has never yet farted.

14

Hotstoppers are FUN don't you see?

They're more than just plastic to me

A man quickly learns

From his third degree burns

That it's no fun to wait in A&E

15

Freebooted content's for jerks,

It sucks to steal people's hard work.

It bums YouTubers each day,

Like Brady and Grey,

And Henry and Michael and Dirk.

16

There once was an Adelaide man

Who came up with the naughtiest plan,

Through the protests of Grey,

“Limericks, Hooray!”

And then with this concept he ran.

17

There once was a fellow named Tim

Who downloaded H.I. on a whim.

As he sat on his flight,

He received quite a fright:

Plane crash corner was mentioning him!

18

01001000

01001001

But Grey, what does that mean?

My mind is not a machine

00111111

19

Sadly I'm filled with regret,

That my needs just haven't been met,

I'm a tactical shopper

Who wants a hot stopper,

So now I get coffee from Pret.

20

Over an endless horizon a plane flies.

It’s been diverted to Dulles, Grey cries.

An airport so boring,

Grey’s already snoring,

Dreaming of Brady as he closes his eyes.

21

For a linguist, I tend to bumble;

Over English I often tumble,

But despite the nice term —

Even I can confirm,

You’ll never advance the brag-humble.

22

There once was a teacher called Grey,

Who decided to quit one day.

He packed up his chalk,

And he took a short walk,

To his auto, which drove him away!

23

There once was an Aussie named Brady

Who had the same name as a lady

Met a Yankee called Grey

And said to him hey

Let's talk on the internet maybe

24

But within that strange microwave lay

A twist set to ruin his day

His plans were defeated

The brew superheated!

And made quite the "Graey's Hand" sautée

25

For any would-be ballot stuffer

Referendum by postcard is tougher

But a quick offline poll

Spiralled out of control

And for this postal workers did suffer

26

The county flags of Liberia

Were so bad they gave me listeria

I had my last meal

Read Guns Germs and Steel

And died from plane crash hysteria

27

Some words come from Latin or Greek

but some, from an ambitious geek

"hotstopper" is cute

and so is "freeboot"

but "brag humble" seems pretty weak

28

Brady surprised Grey with a ticket

To see a test match of cricket.

But when he tried to explain

The rules of the game,

He was dismissed leg before wicket.

29

Four thousand two hundred nine

Is the number of videos, you'll find

That Grey needs to release

By the end of next week

To only be slightly behind