Nintendo CEO Satoru Iwata, wearing the hat of a man who has single-handedly brought the company to its knees

Nintendo released its financial results today for the fiscal year that ended on March 31—a period that coincides almost exactly with the Year Of Luigi—and the company is still struggling to get its head above water. That’s what happens when you put your company in the hands of Luigi: You post an operating loss of $456 million in a single year (note: PDF link), with a net loss of $228 million. Among the most notable fuckups that can be attributed to Luigi’s piss-poor leadership are dwindling sales of the Wii U—Nintendo sold 2.72 million of them, well behind the PlayStation 4 and the Xbox One—and a dearth of quality non-Luigi-related Wii U games. But even Mario’s idiot brother couldn’t run the Nintendo 3DS into the ground, as Nintendo’s flagship portable continues to sell at a steady clip—12.26 million of them were sold in the fiscal year. If players love the 3DS so much, why don’t they marry it? Oh, right, they can’t. [via Engadget]