***Update***: The student in question has apologized.

…

We all knew the American Atheists bench outside the Bradford County Courthouse in Florida was a prime target for vandals… but I wasn’t expecting this.

Someone named “Zach Hillbillyboy Osborne” spit tobacco juice on the bench — a stain I’m not sure will come out — and then had the audacity to (A) take a picture of it and (B) send that picture to American Atheists:

He made a completely intelligible comment while he was at it, and AA responded:

AA is filing a police report. They also made this suggestion to other potential vandals:

Hint to future vandals: If you’re going to deface a monument, you might consider not taking a picture of your handiwork, then posting this picture and bragging about it directly to the Facebook page wall of the group responsible for the monument, using your real name, with Facebook profile photo included. Just a thought.

It’s good advice, but I’m glad Hillbillyboy ignored it. It makes this process so much easier…

In case you’re curious about Osborne’s religious views, his Facebook profile says “Hooker,” so you know we’re talking about a real winner here…

(For what it’s worth, it looks like his entire Facebook page is full of misinformation, including his age and graduation date, so I wouldn’t take any of it very seriously. His Facebook friends and pictures make it seem like he’s about to start his junior year of high school.)

Though I should say this Facebook post makes it sound like he is, indeed, a Christian:

So for those of you in a betting pool, the answer was 21 days. That’s how long it took for the bench to get vandalized.



