Build a Healthy Love life with Your Spouse

It's clear from the many letters I get that lots of folks have no idea what a healthy relationship even looks like.

From many sources and many experts, I have culled some basic rules of relationships. This is by no means an exhaustive list.

Relationship tips for Woman

Know your partner's beliefs about relationships.

Different people have different and often conflicting beliefs about relationships. You don't want to fall in love with someone who expects lots of dishonesty in relationships; they'll create it where it doesn't exist.

Love is not an absolute

Love is not an absolute, not a limited commodity that you're in of or out of. It's a feeling that ebbs and flows depending on how you treat each other. If you learn new ways to interact, the feelings can come flowing back, often stronger than before.





Know your needs and speak up for them clearly.

A relationship is not a guessing game. Many people, men as well as women, fear stating their needs and, as a result, camouflage them. The result is disappointment at not getting what they want and anger at a partner for not having met their needs. Closeness cannot occur without honesty. Your partner is not a mind reader.

Have your own life.

You might be crazy in your love relationship with each other, but that doesn’t mean the rest of your life should stop. Don’t abandon your friends for him. Don’t take up golf and give up your massages if you don’t want to. Have some independence and an identity of your own. Because if you don’t, things will get boring and routine in the relationship.

Don’t be needy.

Being needy and chasing can go hand-in-hand. If you want to see him 24/7, text him 24/7, and basically think the world resolves around him, well, you’re being needy.

Needy behavior is suffocating for people, especially men. You think these behaviors will help you hold on to him, but it actually has the opposite effect – it pushes him away.

Respect, respect, respect. Outside and Inside the relationship, act in ways so that your spouse always maintains respect for you. Mutual respect is essential to a good relationship.

Don’t be a people pleaser. Don’t be a people pleaser.

Many women mistakenly believe that if they please other people, then they will automatically love them. This couldn’t be farther from the truth!

A lot of people will take advantage of you if you give too much of yourself. Instead, strive for a healthy balance of being self-less and selfish.

Please your partner, but also make sure they please you too. Relationships are a two-way street.

Know how to manage differences.

It's the key to success in a relationship. Disagreements don't sink relationships. Name-calling does. Learn how to handle the negative feelings that are the unavoidable byproduct of the differences between two people. Stonewalling or avoiding conflicts is not managing them.

Speak your mind.

When I say “speak your mind,” I mean doing it gently and calmly. Don’t suppress your negative (or positive) emotions. Let them out.

Talk to your relationship partner about any problems you are having. Try to see yourself as a team and solve the problems together. You deserve respect and to have your voice heard.

Solve problems as they arise.

Don't let resentments simmer. Most of what goes wrong in relationships can be traced to hurt feelings, leading partners to erect defenses against one another and to become strangers. Or enemies.

Make sure you connect physically, emotionally, and mentally.

Easier said than done, but these three things are crucially important.

If you’re just physically connected, but you don’t connect emotionally or mentally, then you won’t make it for the long haul.

Or maybe you connect mentally, but your intimacy is just “meh.” The relationship may be doomed.

You have to have strong bonds in all areas of your relationship, so make sure you keep an eye on that from the very beginning.

Enrich your relationship by bringing into it new interests from outside the relationship.

The more passions in life that you have and share, the richer your relationship will be. It is unrealistic to expect one person to meet all of your needs in life.

Listen, truly listen, to your partner's concerns and complaints without judgment.

Much of the time, just having someone listen is all we need for solving problems. Plus it opens the door to confiding. And empathy is crucial. Look at things from your partner's perspective as well as your own.

Make good sense of a bad relationship by examining it as a reflection of your beliefs about yourself. Don't just run away from a bad relationship; you'll only repeat it with the next partner. Use it as a mirror to look at yourself, to know what in you is creating this relationship. Change yourself before you change your relationship.

Human beings crave intimacy, need to love and be loved. Yet people have much trouble doing so.Women spend a lot of time over-analyzing the male psyche. Their tight-lipped approach towards relationships and dating is what drives these women mad and gives them endless excuses to spend their weekend over a cocktail with friends discussing why men drive them crazy. Have you been dating a guys, all of who seem perfect to begin with, only to find that they’re just so wrong for you?In case you're experiencing serious difficulties discovering Mr. Right in the extensive rundown of the wrong folks, here are 15 straightforward relationship tips for ladies that can enable you to comprehend folks and their mind better, and even help you draw out your best dating side in the blink of an eye.Take care of yourself.A big part of having a happy and successful relationship is feeling good about yourself. Taking care of yourself physically, mentally, and spiritually will help you be all you can be for your partner. Make sure you’re taking time to work out, eat right, meditate, or do what you need to feel healthy and fulfilled.Give him some control.Try not to be reluctant to give a person a chance to deal with you from time to time. For a person, nothing makes him feel more like a man than when he trusts he's dealing with you.When you're have relationship with a person, and you need him to succumb to you and feel defensive towards you, you have to give him a chance to deal with you. Try not to be guarded to the point that he feels futile around you.Don't come close.Never go searching for your former relationship in another one, and don't go searching for your ex's characteristics in your present sweetheart. In the event that you continually endeavor to search for likenesses, you'll end up discovering somebody who's actually similar to your ex, and that may not by any stretch of the imagination work to support you. Rather, search for characteristics that you'd like to find in a perfect beau.Don't be a busybody.Try not to play mind amusements with your spouse in a relationship. It'll simply bother him or push him further away. Rather, make inquiries, uncover how you feel and quit anticipating that a person should peruse your mind constantly.Weed out the negatives in relationship.What makes you feel unconfident or uncertain? Try not to conceal yourself since you believe you aren't sufficient for the world. Being delightful is only a perspective!Cherish yourself, and each time you locate an apparent defect in yourself, enhance yourself. Concealing yourself from the world won't fix or change anything. Confronting the world, then again, will give you the inspiration to be as well as can be expected be.If it's not working, abandon it!A few things merit battling for, yet another relationship? All things considered, it's simply not worth the exertion. Try not to get into an association with qualms, and don't clutch connections that you know needs to end in the end since you don't see a cheerful future in it. Remaining on in a terrible relationship will never give you bliss, not presently, not ever.Every relationship is different, and every man and woman are different too. As you approach your relationships, keep these thoughts in mind as general guidelines and things to watch out for, but use your best judgement.