Trump on Friday said he was “surprised” that Robert Kraft was busted for patronizing a sleazy massage parlor in Florida—but emphasized that his billionaire buddy “has denied it.”

Other people who’ve received the Kraft treatment from Trump include Bill O’Reilly, who the president insisted was a “good person” who didn’t do “anything wrong” after the ex–Fox News host settled for $13 million with five women who’d accused him of sexual harassment. Our newest Supreme Court justice, human six-pack Brett Kavanaugh, was given a similar pass, claiming that his treatment “violate[d] every notion of fairness, decency, and due process.” As of late Friday afternoon, the president had not taken to the Internet to decry the Kraft news as a “GIANT MISCARRIAGE OF JUSTICE,” “A HOAX,” or a “WITCH HUNT,” though he does do his best tweeting in the early hours of the morning, so give him time.

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The Kushners eye new batch of tenants to subject to their slumlord-esque ways

After being bailed out of its worst investment ever, in part by the Qatar Investment Authority, Jared Kushner’s family has reportedly acquired more than 6,000 middle-class rental apartments valued at roughly $1.25 billion, 70 percent of which Kushner Cos. plans to borrow. According to The Wall Street Journal, the acquisition is part of a plan by the company to rebuild its suburban portfolio, which will now include roughly 22,000 units with another 6,000 in the pipeline, “due to the economics of the deals and the relatively low risk of middle-class housing during a downturn.” The First-in-Laws predict they will be able to raise rents by 3 percent annually, though hopefully for the current tenants they’re no longer engaging in alleged slumlord-esque tactics that included filing false paperwork to skirt strict oversight and subjecting people in multiple buildings to “extensive construction, with banging, drilling, dust, and leaking water that tenants believe were part of targeted harassment to get them to leave and clear the way for higher-paying renters.” (The company has blamed the false documents that allowed them to get around regulations on the third parties that prepared them, and said, “if mistakes or violations are identified, corrective action is taken immediately.”)

Another apartment building votes to rid itself of the stench eau Trump

If only removing him from office was as easy as removing his name from a series of condos along the West Side Highway: