

I'm new comer to the shroomery and figured retelling one of the most intense trip experiences i've had would be a good introduction. At the peak, I died.



Just some background info:

this particular instance was the 4th time i tripped acid, had candyflipped before, and i had tripped shrooms once before.



well, before I begin my story, I should probably distinguish between the literal meaning of “died” and my meaning of “died”… my heart never stopped beating, but I lost my body. Not that I misplaced it, more like It left Me.



one hit of lsd



The seed was probably sewn around the time we started watching nostradamus: 2012. I had dosed with a friend & we went to her boyfriend's house to hang out for a while, smoke some weed. We had just dosed about an hour earlier and it was already intense. My jeans became denim waterfalls & everything was moving in a spiral fashion.



This is where it started getting creepy crawly. His friends came over, none of whom I knew. I kept thinking they were judging me & I felt that I couldn't interact with them in any way. My friend gave me a candy bar & I ate it even though I wasn't hungry. Immediately after, my mouth became a desert & I started dwelling on my eating disorder (which I still swear psychedelics helped me overcome).



We had to leave that house. I was surrounded by conceited frat boys who had no idea what it meant to hallucinate. (Not to mention I had just found out that acid didn’t effect my trip buddy in any way) So we went to her apartment. Watched Blue Planet. And painted. And tried to settle down. But the tv kept talking to me, & I just needed a break from that damn thing.



And this is where I tell you that I’m pretty much obsessed with the History Channel’s show “The Universe”. I must’ve stored the information from the last show I watched (End of the Universe) in my little brain. - We could end in ice age by all the stars burning out, or fire by gravity pulling us back into the primordial atom that was the big bang, or by being ripped apart by the excessive accelerating expansion caused by dark matter. Let’s focus on the last one.



My friend & I headed outside to smoke a cig and wrapped ourselves up in blankets (it was December 1). And oh, you could actually see millions of stars in the middle of town. And I’m fucking tripping. Hard. There’s a beautiful ribbon of light spectrum interweaving through all the celestial bodies & keeping motion in time. And then I asked my friend what time it was. And here’s the problem- I don’t know if she answered me or not. But I took her answer (or lack thereof) to mean it was the end of time.



And that’s where it got me. I looked back up at the sky. The rainbow ribbon was gone & so were all the stars. And I couldn’t look away. This was the end of the universe- every molecule was being ripped to shreds. And as I’m staring into blank black, I feel my body (literally, it was a sensation) disintegrate. But I still can’t look away. And the feeling is moving from my hands, up my arms, into my body, & then I can’t feel anything anymore. I don’t see anything but black. And I knew that I was just a collection of ideas somewhere outside of space and time.



What enabled me to regather my composure, my courage, I shall never be able to remember. If it weren’t for the skeptics, I would utter the name of God. I tore off the blanket which pocketed the warmth around me. And my body was still there. I must’ve been in that state for an eternity.





The next day, I cried at various and inappropriate times. I felt like a part of me had gotten lost in a realm i could never go back to. Looking back now, it screams "set and setting" at me. I'm still in complete awe I experienced this and don't consider it a 'bad' trip, just a singular experience i will never forget and am infinitely grateful for.



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full blown human



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