How does one say “shithole” in Ancient Greek? As with other such esoteric considerations, this takes us into the depths of metaphor and meaning. Is a “shithole” a place whence shit emerges or one in which shit properly settles to age? To be more pointed, when we say “shithole”, do we mean the rectum (so is it a synonym for “asshole”) or do we mean a receptacle too primitive and unformed to be graced with the designation ‘toilet’?

I think when the leader of what was once the free world uses the term , he probably means the second meaning–that the countries designated so are “primitive”, bereft of proper sanitation, and, as such, both filled with excrement (in his excitable mind) and a worthy place for excrement to stay. Thanks to the magic of the conceptual metaphor, of course, the “shithole” can simultaneously indicate both origin and receptacle. One reason it is terribly racist is that the people who move from one to the other or inhabit them are, by extension, excrement.

Because I process trauma and horror through ancient Greek and lexicography, I need to ‘own’ this word by putting it in Greek. I think the stronger force of this metaphor is the location of discarded shit not the organ of excretion. Ancient Greek does not have a clear parallel (and believe me, gentle reader, I looked). I would love to hear some other suggestions. I put the call on Twitter.

The best suggestion, I think, is σκατοχάσμα (skatokhasma, see below). I like it because it has clear parallels (e.g. skatophage). Also, it sounds like “shit-gasm” which is what I think happens every time a certain chief executive speaks. Weaknesses: khasma is not very productive in ancient Greek compounds and is also rather ‘epic’ in scope. In English, “hole” is dimunitive a small. Shitholes are thus additionally awful because of their insignificance.

Honorable Mentions: τὸ σκατώρυγμον (skatorugmon). this has the sense of something hastily and poorly made by people. Also, κοπροβάραθρον is, as one correspondent declared, totally “metal” and, really epic. (Also, coprophilia is something the captain of our ship might cop to). The Lexicographer Zonaras treats all three of these nouns as synonyms (“Barathron: A ditch. A depth. The maw of the earth.” Βάραθρον. ὄρυγμα· βάθος· χάσμα γῆς). For me, barathron is mythical; orugmon is man-made, and khasma is more generic and ‘natural’. I prefer it, in sum, because of its huuugeness. It is really big. And the speaker mentioned above doesn’t do anything small.

*looks wistfully into middle distance* https://t.co/eqXjg4hbLT — Dr Amy Coker (@AECoker) January 12, 2018

τὸ σκατώρυγμον — Tuomo Sipola (@TuomoSipola) January 12, 2018

@Poochigian has offered up #scatochasm I cannot improve on that. — Angela Taraskiewicz (@ATaraskiewicz) January 12, 2018

κοπροβάραθρον. — Toph Marshall (@Tophocles) January 12, 2018

I love this, it has a more black metal / Tolkien feel to it than my translation. — Tuomo Sipola (@TuomoSipola) January 12, 2018

Cn. Piso calls Athens a “colluvies nationum” at Tac. Ann. 2.55 — Patrick J. Burns (@diyclassics) January 12, 2018

κοπροπή, which is an anagram for προκοπή — ChristopherMoutoulas (@chmtls) January 12, 2018

Some Instructive Compounds

κοπρόνους: “manure-minded”

κοπράγωγεω: “to collect crap”

κόπρειος: “full of crap”

κοπρολογεῖν: “to gather crap”

κοπροφαγεῖν: “to eat crap”

κοπροστόμος: “foul-mouthed”

σκατοφάγος: “shit-eater”

κόπρανα: “excrements”

κοπραγωγός: “shit-bearer”

κοπρία: “dung-heap”

κοπρίζω: “to make dung”

κοπρικός: “full of it”

κοπροθέσιον: “a place where dung is put”. ‘Shit-bucket”

κοπροδοχεῖον: “cess pool”

κοπροποιός: “dung-making”

σκατοφάγος: “shit eater”

σκαταιβάτης: “shit-walker”

σκωραμὶς: “shit pot”; cf. Ar.Lys. 371: σκωραμὶς κωμῳδική: “comedic shitpot”

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