YOUNGSTOWN, OH—Looking for honest feedback on the latest addition to her wardrobe, local 27-year-old Molly Hanson reportedly asked her panicking boyfriend “Does this look good?” while wearing a new Big Bird outfit. “I spent a little more than I usually do, but I really think it compliments my figure,” said Hanson, as she spun around for her stammering, sweat-covered boyfriend of six months, giving him a full view of the bright yellow plumage, ribbed pink-and-orange leggings, and 8-inch beak she had purchased earlier that afternoon. “Does it look flattering? I haven’t taken the tag off yet, so if you totally hate it, I can still return it and get my $200 back. The important thing is that you like it.” At press time, after 15 minutes of stumbling over his words, Hanson’s boyfriend admitted the outfit went great with her eyes despite his disappointment that it wasn’t Oscar the Grouch.

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