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The Drink

venturebrosblog.com

Ingredients

Kahlua

Hershey's syrup

Dash of red Kool-Aid

On paper, this seems like a good combo! Since it was such a highly recommended drink, I really wanted to make sure I did it justice. I found a transcript of the audio commentary for this episode on the Venture Bros. blog, where the creators explain that the proper way to make the Kooler is to add Kahlua and so much chocolate syrup that it's "thick and almost undrinkable." So I did just that. I filled about half the glass with coffee liqueur and then started piling on the syrup. You can see it start to pool at the top of the glass.

Erik Germ



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I gave the drink a sip sans-Kool-Aid first to see how it tasted. It was actually really good, but far too rich to drink too much of. I was sure I had the right consistency when I put the straw in and found that, instead of falling to the side of the glass like a normal straw, it stood fully erect.

Erik Germ

Me too, man.

Finally, I added my sprinkling of red Kool-Aid to the top. Like the syrup, it kind of just floated there, with nothing to do except sit atop its chocolaty tower.

Erik Germ



I don't ever read my horoscope, but I'll bet the day I made this monstrosity, it said something along the lines of "No good can come of that drink, Erik, you idiot." I'm starting to think that cartoon character didn't actually try this drink, because there's no way he would realistically be able to keep any of it down. First of all, it's thick, like trying to suck a soft piece of Laffy Taffy through a straw. Since the straw itself was about as useful as Kool-Aid in chocolate sauce, I threw it in the garbage where it belonged and prepared to drink it the old-fashioned way. If you like chocolate and also getting diabetes, you might enjoy this drink. You also might get a quick glimpse of the cherry as you're drinking, but overall, expect to be full-on molested by chocolate. I didn't like what this drink did to me or how it made me feel about my decisions in life, so I ended up dumping most of it. After a brief chocolate coma, I moved onto the final drink.