BACK to school for the boys and girls of Westminster, with MPs comparing tans and swapping holiday stories ahead of the first PMQs of the new season.

Demoted Cabinet Minister Matthew Hancock awkwardly loitered at the door of the House of Commons, clearly missing the spoils of the frontbench.

3 The first session back since the summer recess was an easy win for the PM Credit: PA

New faces on the Government line up, new toady MPs sitting in shot behind the new PM, and possibly a new suit for the useless Leader of the Opposition.

But some things never change...

Jeremy Corbyn had two months of summer to prepare his opening joke and still managed to duff it up - "welcome back" came the sarcastic cry from the government benches.

3 Jeremy Corbyn was soundly beaten at PMQs Credit: PA

Meanwhile Labour MPs behind their hapless leader rolled their eyes.

Mr Corbyn was back to quoting members of the public - Jenny this time who said something about housing.

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But Mrs May had done her homework too, hitting back with replies to the veteran lefty's Twitter feed about his dire polling numbers.

Warming up she got a roar for declaring: "What we do know is that whoever wins the Labour leadership election we are not going to ever let them near power again."

3 The PM called the opposition leader a "laughing stock" Credit: PA

But she wasn't done there and was just waiting to pounce on Mr Corbyn's horrific Train-Gate gaffe this summer.

Full steam ahead: "The train has left the station, the leader is on the floor... Even on rolling on stock they are laughing stock."

Mr Corbyn wittered on for a few more minutes but he never managed to get up off the floor.

By the time Mrs May had moved on to there being "only one party that is going to provide a country, and economy and a society that works for everyone" the Labour benches looked like they would rather be back on the beach.

SCORE: Theresa May 6-0 Jeremy Corbyn