STUPID WEB PAGES:

I have seen a number of sites (or have been denied from seeing them) that claim to require the Microsoft Internet Explorer web browser application software to view them. I have taken the liberty of translating some of the messages I have seen to expose their true meaning:



We are (not really) sorry, our page only works in IE 5.0 or higher.

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This web page requires IE 6 or higher because MS paid us a lot of money.

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This page is best experienced in MSIE 5.5. We will give you an electric shock each time you visit our page with any other web browser. Why? Because we hate you.

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The site is best viewed in Internet Explorer because I am too lazy to test it in anything else.

This site has been visited by 0041748 people I don't care about

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This page requires IE because it uses Active X controls because we follow in the steps of the almighty Bill Gates.

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Baw, you need a Microsoft Browser to see my pukey page!

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This site is designed to work exclusively in MSIE 4 and higher. MSIE is the standard web browser. ("Standard" meaning a mandatory requirement that we will shove down your throat). Failure to use the browser we dictate will result in painful death.

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This page is specifically designed for the broken functionality of Microsoft Internet Explorer. We can not be bothered to validate our HTML or look at the page in another browser.

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This site only looks right in IE 5.5 SP2, at 800*600 resolution with 24bit color using a full size window, and the default toolbars all showing. The Verdona and Georgia fonts must be present. Your browser font size must be set to medium. Your windows appearance settings must be set to "windows default". The wind must be blowing from the south.

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This page ONLY works in IE 5.01. (Although it actually works in anything, I just like IE 5.01 for some reason... mmmm.... Bill is my master...)

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The CrapyCrapCor home page is best viewed on my computer with my IE because I can't grasp the concept that a web page looks slightly different on every single computer.

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This page is best viewed in IE 4. Unless you don't like the stupid IE tricks we use on this page.

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X We only support Microsoft Internet Explorer. We are such a bunch of jerks we think we can make the rest of the world use the same thing we do by refusing access to our site to those who choose to use other web browsers.

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Really! Our page isn't broken... it's advaaanced. Get IE 6 or else.

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We here never heard of no Ohpra browser or Net-escape. We dun use that Innernet Explorer thing. Meby you shud use that.

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< BR >

<!-- Well, this site probably only looks right in MSIE 4.01 because I am actually being held hostage by the IT department here and that is all those bastards gave me to use. HELP! -->

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This page requires IE 6, and therefore will not work on Windows 95!

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Hey look at us! We are completely denying access to everything other than IE 5 because one little table on our site is slightly out of alignment on other browsers!

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This page works best if you have MSIE 6, Windows XP, Office XP, and all of the other latest Microsoft products because Microsoft is good.



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HTTP Error 666

Microsoft Internet Explorer not found.

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Bill, Bill, Bill... We love Bill. You need Bill to see our page. You will love Bill too. Bill is wonderful.

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Business?! Weeeee don't need no stenkin' business from any Mozilla user!

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STOP! You must have Microsoft Internet Explorer to view this page. We have done all kinds of retarded non-standard IE only tricks just to be cool. And to piss you off.

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This page is written using Microsoft Front Page so it only looks right in MSIE. Please have mercy and shoot me.

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Infidel! You have not conformed to the great Microsoft way! Download Microsoft Internet Explorer at once and rejoice in the glory that is Microsoft! Hail Bill Gates!

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A Netscape user!? We don't want your kind here because we are a bunch of fucking browser bigots. Go away.

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This site is best viewed with Idiot Exploiter and we are going to pop this message up on

each page to make you feel like you are an idiot for using that non-MS browser. Long live the Microsoft Empire!

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This web site is designed for Intornut Expierer - It's not even vaguely valid HTML!

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This site was proudly de signed in M icfort Runtpage AKA The HTML Cuizinart - g ood luck viewing our pag e with a nything other than IE! Or even WITH IE for that matter!

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If you can read this then you are already using MSIE because this page freaking crashes other browsers.

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SITE POLICY:

Our site policy requires you to use MSIE 5.0 or later to view our site. Failure to comply with this policy is punishable by up to 5 years in prison.

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WARNING! We have detected that you are using a NETSCAPE browser im going to be a complete shit and yell and scream and not let you view this site because I'm a jackwad and I'm going to make you use IE.

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I think you need to use IE. I THINK you need to use IE. I THINK you need to use IE!

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This page requires MSIE 6 or better. Of course anything is better than IE and... hu? Oh, ALL HAIL BILL GATES!

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This page is 100% valid MSHTML. We guarantee it will only view in MSIE.

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You are viewing this site in a browser other than the glorious, almighty Internet Explorer.

abunchofstupiddumbsucks.com takes advantage of you and the non-standard features provided by Internet Explorer. We hate you and your free thinking kind. We invite you to become a mindless borg drone and download and get screwed up the ass by a copy of Internet Explorer. We look forward to your return visit as a worshiper of Bill Gates.

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Welcome To yet another poorly designed web site. This site is incorrectly detecting that you have an old browser because we are clueless. We use features such as integrated BSODing and hard drive formatting that may not occur in your browser. To enjoy these features you may wish to upgrade to Microsorft Internet Exploiter 5 or worse. Click somewhere around here to continue.

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HI! and GOOD BY! Access denied! When we designed this site IE 5.0 was the only browser that could do the stupid tricks we use on our page. We just don't care that every other browser on the planet would otherwise work fine now. Get lost. Haven't you gone away yet?

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You may continue viewing this page, but we don't like web browsers whose name starts with a "K". Or operating systems whose names start with an "L". This page has been brought to you by the letters "M" and "S".

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