Okay just ONE more thing and then I’ll stop talking about #bobafettisalesbian2k16, which has certainly ceased to hold any interest for everyone except me.

I don’t, in general, like fighting on the internet. That’s not my idea of fun. And I think it’s kind of a bummer to start – and especially to exacerbate – a pointless argument about something you don’t care about with people who really do care about the thing. I don’t, frankly, care about Star Wars canon. It’s fine if you do, I just don’t! At all! I said “Boba Fett is a lesbian” for three reasons.



I did not recall seeing Boba Fett’s face ever, because those first three movies are a damn mess imso [in my stupid opinion] and I’ve literally erased everything about them from my mind cave (by drinking), and this just looks real gay to me, sorry about it.



BUT: some people DID care! And they got really mad! At me! ME, a delight!



I mean, a tip of the hat for “assmangler.” (And no, I didn’t. I’ve never seen “Star Wars,” obviously.) But here’s my thing. WHY DO YOU CARE? Why can’t Boba Fett be a fucking lesbian? Why is this the hill you want to die on?

First of all, I’m at least 70 years older than whoever this is and saw the first Star Wars in 1936, so get off my dick Junior. Second of all, WHY? WHY DOES SOMEONE SAYING “MAYBE THIS CHARACTER IS A LESBIAN” ON THEIR OWN DANG INTERNET WEBLOG NEED TO BE STOPPED? WHO CARES? I spend literally every day making grand statements about shit I’m not sufficiently informed about – sometimes issues that actually affect the lives of real people – and yet THIS is the maddest the internet has ever been at my dumb ass! That’s insane!

HAHA, WHAT? Anyway, so now it’s no longer me, a person who did not care, riling up some nerds who did care. NOW I DO CARE. Boba Fett is a Lesbian, 2k16. As Boba Fett (a lesbian) herself once said: “He’s no good to me dead [or alive, because he is a man, and I am a radical trans lesbian separatist with no use for men].” Get off my lawn about it, ya damn animals.