Stack Exchange has a policy for how users are dealt with when they break the Code of Conduct. It's a policy that involves communication followed by a "cooling off" suspension (the words "cooling off" are actually used in the suspension templates). If the behaviour doesn't change after the first suspension happens, another (longer) suspension is often imposed. If this action doesn't work, then a more permanent suspension might be needed. Removing a high-rep user takes a lot of discussion and a lot more consideration. Removing a moderator from their post has a formal procedure - I've been part of one of these processes and it was handled with the utmost of respect and dignity.

Monica was one of the most senior and respected moderators on the whole of this community.

Monica wasn't offered the opportunity to have a time-out to reflect on the needs of the proposed CoC changes (Sabbat and Rosh Hashana involves a few days staying off-site). A time-out to reflect is a fundamental right that we offer to all users in cases of conflict.

Monica is my captain. There is no one else I would rather follow in this community - she is the perfect embodiment of “leading by example”. She has been a leading light and community builder on every community she's led, and more than a few that she hasn't. The value that's she's added to the platform as a whole is incalculable.

Within the confines of the moderator curtains, I witnessed at first hand this whole sorry story play out. Gilles’ meta post carries most of the context.

I didn’t resign due to the underlying issue, it’s more about how SE went about sacking Monica that’s the thing for me. Cold, calculating, and impersonal with no regard to her good standing or experience. I wouldn’t have canned any user with that same lack of empathy.

SE does have a large disconnect between the company and the community that underpins it. I was hoping that things would get better after the previous Twitter/HNQ debacle.

Sadly, SE is no further on in talking with its users. I cannot in good conscience continue serving a community when I don’t feel valued, heard, or supported by the level above me.

I say "SE" here, because I believe this is where the problem lies. In the previous Twitter/HNQ issue, it was SE taking a decision without informing or conferring with the moderators of the site that their change affected. Again, with Monica, SE took any input and decision out of the hands of moderators who were in the middle of passionately discussing this issue. I don't believe that any moderator was asking for Monica's dismissal - it was imposed on us all.

UPDATE (11 Oct 2019):

For the days following my resignation, I watched events further unfold. And my site was left unmoderated, through no fault of the users who go there to ask and offer help. After days of agonizing, I requested reinstatement.

Monica was fired on the 27th September, for a CoC violation of a CoC that didn't exist at that time. Moderators were consulted on various drafts of the CoC amendments and we successfully requested the removal of the compelled speech ("do not avoid using pronouns when requested"). This clause implies that people cannot address people by name or "The OP" if they declare a pronoun. This makes a mockery of how to address them individually among a discussion group of many participants. I thought that we had reached a clear, concise, straightforward wording.

We, the moderators, didn't expect the raft of FAQ clauses that followed, and the compelled speech enforced by them. The FAQ is bewildering, confusing, and intimidating. The net effect is that the CoC is more divisive than inclusive, and damages our relationship with our trans and non-gendered users.

And for what?

Apart from the much-publicized violation in the moderator chat (which was part of an ongoing discussion/clarification/understanding process), I have never seen any actual cases in the public spaces where this issue has arisen. I frequent the moderator shared chatroom - no one has shared any examples. No one.

This tells me that the users here on Stack Exchange are already really good at communicating with people and showing others the necessary respect when it comes to their gender.

We are now left to wait and see what other groups of users will be marginalized in the name of "inclusion".

Update 5th November 2019

One month on and where are we now?

After the new & improved CoC amendment FAQ, the community has largely quietened down about the pronoun usage.

There's new & improved moderator action processes (outgoing and incoming) for which there's a transparency in the process, but no transparency in usage.

Monica has been invited to go through the process, but obviously without transparency, there can be no assurance of impartiality. The new process has already failed Monica, without her even needing to lift a finger.

The key, and most important, aspect of this situation is Monica's personal and professional hurt that's been imposed by Stack Exchange in speaking to the press and not attempting to correct the erroneous story which was paraphrased as "We sacked Monica because she's an unrepentant bigot".

David Fullerton offered an apology for this hurt in his statement of regret:

Second, we hurt a longstanding member of the community and an important volunteer moderator. She deserved the benefit of a private, comprehensive process. In the absence of a clear process for handling this kind of situation, we should have taken inspiration from our existing Moderator Action Review Process. We made a decision to act quickly, which I personally approved, but in doing so skipped several critical parts of the process. In acting quickly, we also acted at a time which coincided with a Jewish holiday which she and many other members of our community observe, and we should have taken that more into account in the process. I’m responsible for that, and I’m sorry. We’ll be reaching out to her directly to apologize for the lack of process, privacy, and to discuss next steps. We’ll keep those discussions completely private unless we both agree to share any of it with the community.

From what Monica has said, this personal apology didn't reach far enough and didn't do anything to redress the personal and professional damage caused.

Monica has therefore been forced into the only action possible - legal action.

Stack Exchange has faced a barrage of criticism and moderator resignations over their actions and approach to this situation but has remained steadfast in not doing anything about it.

And there are few signs of anything happening any time soon.

Update 15th Nov 2019

After being unhappy for quite some time, I am again resigning my commission.

This isn't about Monica

This isn't about pronouns

This isn't about the Code of Conduct

This isn't about Sara

This isn't about the CM team (you're all awesome by the way)

This isn't about Stack Exchange

This is about the community, and the moderation team.

I used to enjoy moderating and contributing to the community, both within my base site and the wider community, and now that enjoyment is no longer there. I no longer feel supported, I no longer feel welcome, I no longer feel included.

The Community Moderation team continue to be fantastic and are doing their level best to support the company, the community, and the moderators in between.

However, the toxicity within the moderator space continues, there is a continuing and relentless drive toward negativity. Every day, I enter the Teacher's Lounge and I'm made depressed by the comments that are in the star board. It's just not pleasant and I am quite frankly tired of the drama.

There seems to be an inability or unwillingness for people to separate supporting Monica from supporting the community, and the end result is the community is being harmed.

I don't see anything improving because no one is interested in anything improving.

The same is also evident here in MSE, waves of negativity - it's tiring and I need my life back.

Update 18th November

My diamond how now been removed and I have scheduled the deletion of all of my accounts across the network.

Whatever the interpretation for my action, this wasn't done out a sense of pettiness, attention-seeking, or of protesting against Stack Exchange.

This is my protection from the self-harm that seems to be endemic in the community right now. As much as I support Monica and despise the way in which she was deposed, there is seemingly no end to the amount of conflict that this situation and the events around it has plunged the community into.

I really care about this community, and the amount of care is roughly equal to the amount of hurt I'm feeling in seeing it the way that it is. I feel impotent in the face of the community that seems like it has no wish to heal.

There are those who say that the community should not be allowed to heal while Monica is still in the situation that she is. However hard and hurtful that situation is, it's in the hands of the lawyers, and lawyers move slowly. I don't know how long that wait will be, but I feel uncomfortable being part of a community that remains in conflict with itself while that plays out.

And so I'm leaving, and seeking closure in having my accounts deleted.

I'm sharing my parting words from the Teacher's Lounge. Ordinarily, doing so will get me fired, but these are my words, mine to share.

Parting words: Be good to each other. Find ways of working together for a common, positive, purpose. Avoid needless conflict. Think of the effect of your words on others before committing them to the keyboard. Write for the entire audience and not simply the person you're answering to.

So long, and thanks for all the fish.