A CHILD has been told the only cure for her hamster’s illness is to surgically remove it and replace it with a healthy one.

The operation, known as a hamsterectomy, is completely painless, though owners may notice some minor differences in their pet’s behaviour, colour, species and sex afterwards.

Vet Helen Archer continued: “We diagnose this for all hamster ailments. It has a 100 per cent success rate.

“Just one little injection to knock him out, then once we’re finished the hamster is good as new with a couple of years actually added to his lifespan.”

Dr Archer, who did not spend five years at veterinary college to cure vermin, recommends the same procedure for gerbils, ferrets, mice and fish.

Seven-year-old Joanna Kramer said: “And apparently if I get bored of him there’s another operation that changes him into a budgie.”