1. The Beginning 2. Diagon Alley 3. The Hippopotamati 4. The Hogwarts Express Next >

[DOUBLE DISCLAIMER!] I do not own Jesus (or any part of the associated "Bible" fandom)! Nor do I claim to own any part of the Harry Potter world! These books belong to their authors (GOD and J.K. Rowling) and I am not trying to steal from them! Thanks guys! ^__^



*



Young Jesus was sitting by the side of the road, feeling gloomy. It had been a bad day. He tried preaching in the marketplace, but no one would listen. Then his father came and dragged him back to the workshop. Jesus hated carpentering, but he worked dutifully until his father told him he could leave. Now he was tired and in a bad mood.



"Hello there, boy," a deep voice said.



Jesus looked up, startled. A tall, thin man with a long, white beard and a long, crooked nose stood in front of him. The man was wearing purple robes embroidered with silver moons and stars.



"Who are you?" Jesus asked, staring at the man.



"I am Albus Dumbledore," the old man said, beaming at Jesus. "I've come to rescue you!"



"Rescue me?" Jesus said blankly. "What do you mean?"



The old man smiled. "Well, Jesus, you're a pretty unhappy young man, aren't you? According to our intelligence, you're the only boy with magic in these parts."



"M-Magic?" Jesus stammered. "I don't have magic. Magic is a tool of the Devil!"



"Nonsense!" Dumbledore said cheerfully. "Of course you have magic. And at Hogwarts we'll teach you how to use it!"



"But-"



"Come on!" Dumbledore shouted, grabbing Jesus's arm. Before Jesus could tear away, he felt a yank behind his navel and the world was dissolving in a whirl of color.



*



Jesus woke up lying in an unfamiliar bed. "Where am I?" he asked blankly, sitting up.



A plump woman wearing blue robes bustled up to his bedside. "Drink this, dear, you need your strength," she said briskly, forcing a cup of glowing orange liquid into his hand.



Jesus drank obediently and set the cup aside. "Where am I?" he repeated.



"Lie back down, dear, you can ask questions later-"



"Ah! So you're awake!" Dumbledore, now in bottle-green robes, came striding up to Jesus's bed. "That was a long journey, my boy."



"What is going on!? What sorcery is this!?" Jesus yelled.



"Well now, we've brought you forward through time, Jesus."



Jesus could only stare.



"We're going to teach you how to use your magic."



"I don't have magic! Magic is of the Devil!" Jesus interrupted, but Dumbledore just ploughed on.



"You see, you're the only one with the power to withstand the Evil One."



"What-I don't understand-"



Dumbledore leaned down, looking quite serious. "Satan is loose in the world, Jesus. And his name is Voldemort."