Well boys, I’m back on my bullshit of being argumentative and contrarian. This time around, I’m gonna be doing something new, which will most likely become a full-fledged habit o’ mine: I shall be comparing and contrasting a film with a remake of it, something original, which has never been done before, and never shall be done again, except by me. Today, my victims are The Evil Dead (1981) and Evil Dead (2013). Back in Ye Olden Times (2013) when Evil Dead debuted, before I was actually a fan of the horror genre, my then-date-mate introduced me to the series itself, which I had never before seen. Speaking generously, I was not the biggest fan of the old or the new movies. Many moons later, I tried it out again, with better results, but I’m still not the hugest fan of the original installation. (I, being a man of taste, have an overwhelming preference for The Evil Dead 2: Dead by Dawn [1987].) That being said, my taste for the soft-reboot has grown exponentially during my re-watches, though I find that I am in the minority of fans in preferring it.





To re-hash, OG The Evil Dead is about a group of twenty-somethings (Ash, Cheryl, Linda, Scott, and Shelly) going on a trip into the woods and staying at a cabin. After accidentally summoning demons, they one-by-one become demons and try killing each other, leaving only one character, Ash.





The highlight of the original installation－for me at least－is easily that iconic Sam Raimi camerawork. The shaky, almost slithery quality to the camera movement portrays the camera itself as one of the demons attacking Ash, especially with the eerie rumbling that accompanies it, and watching it is like an attack on the viewer (in a good way). The ultra-close-ups are playful, and the wild Dutch angles are fun. Aside from the camera, many of the effects in general are delightful. The smoke and orange light emanating from the ground after the summoning looks like it came directly from Hell, and the giant moon is surreal and ominous. The full-white contacts are awesome, and bring to mind the blank slate that the characters become, filled in with motivations and desires from a sinister external force. The hideous stop-motion and abysmal makeup magnify the sickening gore.





On the other hand, one of my least favorite parts of the original is the absolute lack of substantial characters aside from Ash. The cast of The Evil Dead is as follows: Protagonist, Protagonist’s Girlfriend, Protagonist’s Sister, Douchey Friend, and Some Lady. Ash is the only one with any real substance, and even he doesn’t have much in the way of personality to work with. There aren’t any real opportunities to meet the characters as individuals, because the spookin’ happens damn-near instantaneously. Having such single-dimensional characters is disappointing, surpassed in being disappointing only the fact that all three of the women devolve into demons first. It happens in the newer Evil Dead, too, but at least there’s some, like, pacing with their transformations. The women of The Evil Dead are defined with their hysterics, and are only interesting and fun to watch after they become possessed (I’m looking at you, Linda).





Something my brother pointed out to me when I first showed him The Evil Dead is how quickly everyone just accepts the situation? Oh, my hand decided that it wanted to draw by itself? I’ll just ignore that. Oh, the bridge has been thoroughly mangles? We’ll just go back to the cabin. Oh, Cheryl is floating mid-air and prophesying our deaths? We’ll just lock her in the basement. It’s pretty clear that this movie doesn’t exist to be meaningful or, like, character-driven; more so it exists just to exist. Which is absolutely fine! That’s valid! But I don’t see how a movie that so obviously lacks a real drive can be seen as the classic that it is. Like, I get why it’s popular, but, as everyone knows, popularity does not imply quality.





I can appreciate the value of the movie for being what it is, y’know? A movie by college kids on a shoestring budget, iconic in its originality and brutality. Just about anyone who considers themself a horror fan has seen it. It’s fun and ugly (my autobiography title), but it isn’t exactly profound. The Rotten Tomatoes consensus describes it as having “just the right amount of gore and black humor,” but I don’t understand the “black humor” part of the description. Dead by Dawn has black humor, absolutely, but the original just has cheesy-ass horror that’s amusing because of its bizarre nature. That ain’t black comedy, that’s camp. I maintain that the funniest fucking part of the movie is Ash’s uncanny ability to be thrown into whatever bookshelf is nearest, and no one can change my mind.





Switching gears, soft reboot/sequel Evil Dead is about a group of twenty-somethings (David, Eric, Mia, Olivia, and Natalie) going to a cabin to help one of them (Mia) detox from her heroin addiction, and, after accidentally summoning a demon, they one-by-one become demons and try killing each other, leaving only one character, Mia.





Evil Dead is more Cinematic, but less cinematic, ya feel me? The shots are prettier, are less of an assault on you. The attempts at remaking the Sam Raimi camerawork don’t exactly hit as hard, either because it isn’t the first time I’ve seen it or because modern technology makes the shots less jerky and aggressive. I sincerely love the use of dolly zooms in Evil Dead, though. A dolly zoom is when a camera, rigged on a dolly, starts close to the subject, and as it quickly backs away, it simultaneously zooms, creating a weird, fish-eye type effect, which is super disorienting.The use of a dolly zoom during each of the early occurrences of Mia seeing Demon Mia is almost sickening, and gives, like, a visual representation of Mia losing her mind. On the other hand, I hate the “modern horror movie” touches: the quick-zoom-musical-sting jump-scare shots that exist to force you into feeling scared, which are cheap and lazy. The equally cheap and lazy Spirit Halloween contacts, the gratuitous strobing, the brown character dying first, the goddamn mirror-medicine-cabinet-scene requisite in all whack horror movies.





On a more positive note, one of my big preferences when it comes to the remake is the actual existence of a plot. Mia’s detox in the cabin is a great reason for her to be so desperate to leave, and for the rest of the characters to be so desperate to stay. (Why a guy would invite his girlfriend to see his sister detox confuses me a little, but eh, splitting hairs.) The tension between David and Mia with their damaged family and the tension between David and Eric with their fractured friendship help keep you nice and uncomfortable for the spookums. Regarding the family dynamic between David and Mia: his desire to support and stay beside his sister through it all is a far more compelling plot device than the romantic one that had the higher ground in the original.





Speaking of which, the remake also has actual, realized characters in it. It’s the same split of two men, three women, but the women take up far more narrative space in the reboot (Not Natalie exactly, but I mention that more in a minute). Olivia is the rational member of the quintet, though her logic ends up causing problems. Eric is a bit of a pretentious tool, and his arrogance causes the whole emergence of the demons. Mia is introduced as jaded and weak, and is the first possessed, yet she ends the movie as the hero. I love her! I love her as a character, and as a villain (aside from a couple of her “ooh edgy scary” lines). One thing that’s strange to me is how David (our Ash stand-in) and Natalie (our Linda stand-in) are the least interesting characters in the re-make, considering they were basically the main characters of the original. Whether that’s a shitty actor problem or a shitty writing problem, I can’t be sure, though I doubt it was shitty writing, since Diablo Cody was one of the editors.





Unfortunately, the newer movie also has all of the females being lost to possession first, but I will accept it for three (3) reasons: the first being that Mia outlives her brother and becomes the heroine (the heroin heroine, rimshot, thank you), the second being that there were at least actual characters to be lost, and the third being that Eric living so much longer than the others means that he gets fucked up by all of the demons (which he deserves for causing all of the demon shit in the first place).





Speaking of Mia outliving her brother, I think the ending of Evil Dead is so fun and creative. They mention Mia being defibrillated after her overdose, and they bring that shit back when David decides to loophole her death. Who fuckin’ knows if it’s possible; you think I’m gonna look it up? And ruin my suspension of disbelief? Never. His loophole reminds me: I love the development of lore in the reboot, specifically the existence of “The Abomination” and the detailing of each of the “steps” to summon it. The way that they took the occurrences from the original and turned it into a sort of guideline reminds me of Cabin in the Woods (2012), which is one of my favorite movies. It’s some of the little stuff like that which makes me appreciate this version so much. Things like all the characters’ first initials spelling out DEMON, or Ash’s car being parked out back of the cabin.





I don’t think Evil Dead is a great movie, just to get that out there. I think it is genuinely better in quality than The Evil Dead, but that is to its detriment, as The Evil Dead’s lack of quality is what captured everyone’s hearts to begin with. One of my concerns about cult classics like this is a form of rose-tinted nostalgia goggles. The weak points of the movies are ignored, sometimes in favor of their strong points, but sometimes just in favor of how popular they are. I think people that claim that the classic is better the modern reboot are engaging in a popularity contest between the two films instead of looking at the quality of them. I’m saying that having a preference is fine, and is a given. I 100% expect and understand that The Evil Dead have a higher esteem among the public, but I also expected critics to actually grade it fairly, instead of through the prism of its infamy. Evil Dead has a more compelling story, better characters, better practical effects, and is genuinely scarier. Why is The Evil Dead considered superior, then? Because it’s The Evil Dead, is my guess.









(ALSO if you ever point out to my how many commas I use I WILL cry.)