Plumb might not have been the most popular or important Brady Kid but when she opted out of returning, not wanting to commit to either 13 episodes or a five year option for more shows, she instantly became not just an important cast member but the most important Brady kid because her absence completely invalidated an already surreally misguided, ill-conceived project.

Making a Brady Bunch variety show without Eve Plumb would be like making a Beatles variety show with a new, slightly revamped line-up of John, Paul, George and Freddie Joe. It wouldn’t matter how talented a drummer Freddie Joe might be. It wouldn’t even matter if he was a better drummer than Ringo. No, all that would matter is that Freddie Joe is not the drummer of the Beatles, a very famous group with a very well-known lineup, and consequently super-fans overjoyed at the Fab Four’s return would never accept him as anything other than a Fake Ringo whose presence alone transforms a potentially satisfying reunion into a deeply unsatisfying almost-reunion.

Under no circumstances could The Brady Bunch Hour have worked. At the risk of being hyperbolic, making the Bradys into variety show hoofers is arguably the single stupidest idea in the history of the universe. But replacing Eve Plumb with newcomer Geri Reischl in the role of Jan truly represents the maraschino cherry placed gingerly atop this three scoop shit sundae that is The Brady Bunch Hour