Continue Reading Below Advertisement

Am I saying that you should stop taking your medication, or not seek mental health care because it's too fucked up? No. Jesus Christ, no. Don't ... is that the message you got from this? If so, I ... suck. Listen: If you need medication, go take it. It's good for you in a lot of cases. Talk to your counselor, if you're lucky enough to have one. Do whatever the hell you need to do to keep control of your life. And avoid taking any life advice from me in general. My life's a wreck. I don't even own a car.

What I'm saying is that when your doctor prescribes you medication and it turns out to not work or make you worse, you can't just label him a dumbass and give up. Taking medication for mental issues is far beyond tricky, to the point that they literally have to guess which one you need and then eliminate it if it doesn't work and try the next one on the list. Yes, the actual real life treatment path is like an episode of House. If they tell you it's lupus, just run away. Bad things are about to happen.

Jochen Sand/Digital Vision/Getty Images

"Give him 12 ounces of mercury and punch him in the face. It's the only cure."

Continue Reading Below Advertisement

I wish I could offer some smart, helpful suggestions for fixing the mental health care system. But the truth is that if people much smarter than me with master's degrees and Ph.D.s and decades of experience can't get a handle on it, I'm pretty sure I'd crash the whole system and get genuinely sick people diagnosed as "just an asshole." But recognizing the problems is a good first step. I just hope they get it fixed soon, because it's kind of a ridiculous clusterfuck as is.

JF Sargent has a ridiculously pulpy sci-fi adventure story about space mechanics that you can read for free until he decides he wants people to have to pay him for it. And who knows when that'll happen! Also Twitter and Facebook.

Always on the go but can't get enough of Cracked? We have an Android app and iOS reader for you to pick from so you never miss another article.