Warning: Here be series-wide spoilers!

PREVIOUSLY ON SURVIVOR: TOCANTINS…

LET’S GET THIS SHOW STARTED!

It’s finally Day 39! And the two best friends are over the moon that they’ve made it to the end together.

They head over to Tree Mail, where their breakfast ingredients are waiting for them.

They share what their first impressions were of each other. J.T. says that he initially thought that Stephen was strong but unathletic, and looked very religious. Stephen says that he immediately saw J.T. as a gregarious charmer, and didn’t think that they would get along so well.

It’s time to leave camp for the last time. *sob*

Both say that despite their close friendship and the fact that they will totally be BFFs for life, they’re both going for the jugular tonight. Brace yourselves folks, it’s gonna get ugly for the next several mins…

IT’S TIME FOR FINAL TRIBAL COUNCIL!

Or, as I’d like to call it…

Stephen’s Death Of A Thousand Cuts.

Stephen’s opening statement talks about how much he’s grown as a person in the game, and jokes that if the winner was decided on who had the most charming Southern drawl, everyone would have saved a lot of time and hunger by deciding on Day 1.

J.T.’s opening statement talks about how he’s at a disadvantage giving a speech tonight because he’s a simple country boy who’s the first member of his family to graduate college and worked very hard to get where he is, and goes into full “gee shucks” mode.

It’s time for the jury to give these boys a grilling. Let’s start with the dragon’s mangled corpse…

Brendan focuses on Stephen’s opening statement about growth, and how it doesn’t matter when it comes to sports. Stephen says that he had to rely on the “outwit” aspect of the game and had the bigger struggle within the game, to which Brendan responds with “so you should be handicapped?” (oops).

He then asks J.T. if personal growth is relevant and important to winning the game. J.T. deals the first of many blows by flat out saying that it isn’t, and accuses Stephen of hiding in the shadows. Stephen then puts his foot in his mouth by claiming that flying under the radar is a legitimate strategy.

Now let’s bring on the grinning weasel…

Erinn brings up Stephen’s changing alliances and how most of the people involved ended up on the jury, and asks him if she should just vote for J.T. (ouch). Stephen says that he used his zig-zag tactic really well and hopes that if anyone respects him for that, they will give him their vote.

She then asks J.T. why Stephen was the best player in the game. J.T. says that it’s because of his honesty and that he was the strongest Jalapao member (this is probably the nicest thing he says about him all night).

Now let’s bring on the principal with the loud voice…

Debbie claims that she’s undecided (yeah, right). She then asks J.T. if her first impression of him of being an honest person was correct or if lying and deception was his M.O. J.T. says that his momma told him before he left that he needed to lie in the game, successfully making it look like that deception was something that he HAD to do and that’s not who he really is.

She then asks Stephen that if he had been the one wearing the Immunity Necklace at the last Tribal Council, would he have taken Erinn or J.T. to the final two. Stephen says he doesn’t know. That’s not good enough for Debbie. She wants a straight answer and she wants it now. Under pressure, he eventually says that his fear is that he would’ve taken Erinn. Cue J.T. putting on his best Oscar face.

Now let’s bring on Mr. Dragonslayer…

Coach asks both of them for examples of honesty and integrity during later stages of the game and being the noble warrior. J.T. currys favour with him by bringing up the fact that he kept his promise that he would never put Coach’s name down, and throws Stephen’s last admission back in his face in the process. Stephen then digs his own grave a bit further by exclaiming that he never took the weasel way out and voted for everyone in the jury.

Now let’s bring on the eyeroll queen…

Sierra has no questions for Stephen. She instead makes a big song and dance to J.T. about how Stephen is totally a goat and he hasn’t really “taken the best to the end”, and that she’s totally lost respect for him now and this might cost him the $1mil, just for the sake of creating a scene.

WHAT. THE. HELL, EVEN?! Has she been watching the same season as the rest of us?! If she wants to have a go at “weak” players, she should look in the mirror first. This is why no-one likes you, Sierra!

Now let’s bring on the class clown…

Tyson asks J.T. if and why Stephen was an asset to him in getting to the final two. J.T. says that Stephen did make things easier for him, but claims that he would’ve still made it this far without him.

Tyson then asks Stephen for a response to that. Stephen says that it isn’t the case for either of them, and seems to be getting seriously rattled by now.

Last, but by no means least, let’s bring on the most bitter member of the jury…

Taj starts off by going into full guilt trip mode. She then asks J.T. why, if it was so hard for him to write down Coach’s name at Tribal Council, it seemed so effortless for him to write down her name and lie to her. He sweet talks her by saying that having to write her name down was the hardest thing he had to do.

She then asks Stephen why he felt it was so important to blindside her. He finally decides to go on the offensive and claims that J.T. wanted to vote her out multiple times, but by this point it comes off less like he’s trying to defend himself and more like he’s desperately clutching at straws, and it’s too little too late for him. After the two boys bicker for a while, Taj decides that she’s heard enough and leaves, only for them to bicker some more.

Stephen then tries to cool things down by saying that their friendship is more important than winning to him. If Stephen wasn’t already on the ropes by now, J.T. deals the killer blow by replying “you would’ve brought Erinn”.

For the last time, it’s time to vote!

Five months later…

The wait is almost over! Who will become the 18th Sole Survivor? Let’s read the votes…

J.T. wins! In a 7-0 blowout!

We come back from a commercial break and OH MY GOD J.T. IS CRYING

This is the happiest day of his life and he has his best friend beside him (aww). He also says that his family never expected him to win and thought that he came 4th at best.

Jeff says that all week in NYC, everyone who came up to him in the street told him that they loved J.T. and hated Coach.

Jeff then asks him about his friendship with Stephen. J.T. says that he thought he was the one person he wouldn’t get along with at first, and warmed to him on the Day 1 trek when Stephen was carrying three times as many items as he was. He also says that Stephen worked his butt off and has the best heart of anyone he knows (double aww).

Jeff then asks Stephen what made their partnership work so well. Stephen puts it down to the fact that their minds are alike, and they both worked hard.

We’re then informed of a previously-unknown mole that helped them out… Stephen says that Coach was instrumental in inadvertently passing J.T. information about Tyson’s plans. Tyson then jokes that he’s now owed a million dollars.

Jeff then brings up Stephen’s shocking admission of breaking the final two pact at Final Tribal Council. This where J.T. fully admits to putting on a huge act pretending to be really miserable that night, much to everyone’s amusement. After all that, they’re still BFFs Forever.

Jeff then asks Brendan how on earth Timbira got decimated after the merge despite being in the majority. He blames it on too many numbers and too much dysfunction between them.

Jeff then asks Erinn about flipping on her old tribe. She says that it was a necessary move and that being at the bottom of an alliance of 4 is better than being at the bottom of an alliance of 6.

Jeff then asks Taj if anyone ever thought about trying to take out J.T. She says never because he was so sweet, and that she really didn’t want to be the one with final immunity because it would’ve been like Sophie’s Choice for her.

Remember J.T.’s broken tooth all the way back in Episode 5? Well, Jeff still has it with him.

J.T. refuses to take it back and suggests that his mom probably wants it, so Jeff goes running into the audience to find his mom Marie and hands it to her.

After a commercial break, Taj then shows off the multiple scars that have been left on her arm from the countless insect bites she got. She’s pretty much in mourning over it because her smooth skin was her most attractive asset.

Jeff then finds her husband Eddie who talks about how his amazing wife triumphed in the wild, and brings up how good he was at striking fires because he was a Royal Ranger.

After all the loveliness, Jeff turns his attention on Tyson, and asks him what the reaction from the Mormon community has been. Tyson says that there are people that love him and hate him, and is fine with that.

Jeff then asks Sierra about people’s first impressions of her and how the rest of the cast hated her. She says that she was being honest with everyone and was trying to be a good person.

After a commercial break, we finally get a date with The Dragonslayer. Jeff asks him about the reaction he’s gotten from strangers regarding the show. Coach says that he’s gotten a fairly nice reaction. Regarding the reactions of his loved ones, he says that they understand the more eccentric aspects of his personality and states that he made his mark on the game. Cue eyerolls from everyone else.

Jeff then brings up the infamous Amazon story. Coach says that he actually had about 100 other stories he could tell but had to share that one. Jeff then says that Coach declined a lie detector test. Coach then announces that he wanted to blindside Jeff by revealing a lie detector test result that he arranged privately. Jeff reads it and apparently, he was telling the truth.

It turns out that Coach has brought a lady friend called Melinda. Jeff asks her if the real Coach is the same person we saw on TV. She says that there’s a difference between the Coach we saw and the Ben Wade she knows and loves. She also says that she slays the dragon in the bedroom.

Jeff asks Debbie what the reaction has been from her school students. She says that everyone has been amazing to her.

After a commercial break, Jeff announces the Sprint Player of the Year. The top 3 is J.T., Taj and Sierra (guess some people actually do like her). J.T. wins and gets an extra $100k on top of his winnings.

Jeff wraps things up by talking to the early boots. Joe’s leg has healed and still very much intact. Both Sydney and Candace have gotten modelling gigs since the show. Spencer had a lot of fun on the show despite the early boot. Jerry has a lot of his army colleagues ragging on him for getting sick. Carolina calls her time on the show a gift. And finally, Sandy is proud that she got a second chance of making a first impression.

The end!

Kylie’s Post Mortem

Sorry to be boring on you guys, but I pretty much agree with the general consensus. While Tocantins as a season has a slow start, the first half does still have some gems in there, and once it gets going from Episode 8 onwards it REALLY gets going.

It is a highly recommended season if you’re a newbie and don’t know where to start because it’s got the best of both worlds. It’s old school enough to not be intimidating, but modern enough to not feel completely irrelevant.

And of course, it introduced us to some great characters. This season has probably my favourite final two of all time. Stephen is kinda like the witty older brother I wish I had because we’re kindred nerdy spirits, and J.T. is arguably the most charismatic winner we’ve ever had and I want to be his best friend. Yes, I’ll admit that they’re greater than the sum of their parts, but I love them together and separately.

And I know people love to rag on J.T. because of his future appearances, and yes, I’ll admit, J.T.‘s an idiot. But he’s a loveable idiot that is smarter than people give him credit for, and I hope that in some way I have helped make people reappreciate him as a Survivor player just a tiny bit.

I’ll leave this here…

Thank you very much everyone for following my Tocantins recap. If you really want me to, I’ll do a whole new recap of a different season. I’m open to requests. See you soon!