1 You have been infected by the Microorganism of Good Grades! Upvote in d100 seconds to gain +d10 points on your next test result.

2 You have been blessed by the Patron Saint of Animal Magnetism! Upvote in d20 seconds or your next social interaction will result in failure.

3 You have activated the Arcane Device of Eternal Sleep! Upvote in d4 seconds to die.

4 You have been possessed by a Vicious Demon of Body Odor! Upvote in d20 seconds or take a shower to not smell bad.

5 You have committed the Thought Crime of Spellbinding! Your next spell will fail.

6 You have entered into conjunction with the Parallel Universe of Accelerated Rest! The next time you sleep, you will wake up well rested.

7 You have unknowingly contacted the Rogue Artificial Intelligence of Warding! The next curse or hacking attempt against you will fail.

8 You have released the Ghost of Misery! Upvote in d100 seconds or be sad for the next d12 months.

9 You have smelled the Blessed Incense of Ceaseless Creation! Upvote in d20 seconds or be cursed with overflowing creative energies.

10 You have found the Forgotten Tome of Wriggly Worms! Upvote in d20 seconds or you will feel worms crawling under your skin for d4 days.

11 You have crossed the Ley Line of Bibliophilia! Your reading speed is increased by 100% for the next d4 days.

12 You have piqued the interest of the Elder Dragon of Free Money! The next time you find unattended money and keep it, you won’t gain bad karma.

13 Your fate has been stirred by the Hobgoblin of Carnal Craving! You are unusually horny for the next d10 days.

14 You have been kissed by the Muse of Lucid Lungs! You are aware of your breathing for the next d20 minutes.

15 You’ve discovered the Universal Constant of Genetic Greatness! Upvote in d100 seconds to have your genes permanently altered and gain a 1% increase to your fitness.

16 Your mind has been invaded by the Extraterrestrial Avatar of Featherweight! The next 1000 calories you consume don’t count.

17 You have gained the favor of the Petty God of Forgetfulness! Upvote in d20 seconds or you will lock yourself out the next time you leave the house.

18 You have been penetrated by the Waveform of Bad Hair! Upvote in d10 seconds or you will have bad hair for d6 days.

19 You have stumbled upon the Pet Rock of Big Think! You will be able to use 100% of your brain for the remainder of the day.