Guess the dice were on my side today… We finally had auditions for the talent show this afternoon.

And I totally nailed it!

Okay, okay… Maybe not totally. The actual playing part went really well…

But I kinda-sorta had a mini freakout before I got out on the stage.

I just hate all the pressure of having to perform in front of people. I always have. And the more people watching, the harder it is.

But like, there wasn’t really even an audience this time… just the judges. Three people! So it should have been easy.

I don’t know why I got so freaked out about it… It was like someone cast a fear spell on me or something.

And I just barely passed my Will save against it.

But once I did, I totally nailed my performance check!

I mean like, it wasn’t perfect or anything, but good enough that they told me I made it! I get to be in the talent show!

I had to try so hard not to make a total idiot of myself when I walked backstage after. I knew Meg’s friends would be there waiting.

It was actually pretty cute. They all kinda ambushed me to ask how it went. And I did my best to play it cool when I told them the news.

That’s basically been Meg’s advice the whole time. “Be yourself,” she told me. “But be calm too. Be cool.”

She’s been giving me some tips on how to deal with my stupid stagefright… And a few pointers on how to impress some of her theater friends too. A couple of them were trying out for the talent show too, so they’ve been staying after school to practice. I’ve seen them hanging out around the auditorium a lot lately. It was kinda hard not to notice them.

The hard part was figuring out how to get THEM to notice ME.

This time I got lucky though. Being friends with Meg totally gave me like, an “in” or whatever. She kinda broke the ice for us last week… Told them I was gonna try out for the talent show too.

And I guess that was pretty much all she had to say.

It was exactly like I said before about Bards. They just ooze charisma without even having to try! All Meg had to do was tell them I could play guitar, and they were asking me all these questions and wanting to look at my guitar and stuff. And once I mentioned Aunt Rylie, I totally had it in the bag. It was almost too easy!

I mean, they still haven’t really heard me play or anything. Just a couple chords to show off. But they’ll hear me at the talent show!

Its finally starting to hit me that I’ve only got two more weeks to practice… and Tam too. He almost missed auditions today. Something about a last-minute practice session with Jasper that went too long, I guess? But he made it just in time. And I guess he must have nailed his audition too!

Jasper practically tackled him afterwards, he was so excited. I know I was kinda jealous at first, but it’s actually nice seeing the two of them becoming such good friends.

Guess all that practice really paid off, huh? Maybe in more ways than one.

And I’m hoping mine will keep paying off too! I mean like, I’m already halfway there, right? I made it through auditions. Now I’ve just gotta worry about the real thing.

Well, maybe not “worry”, exactly… That’s pretty much what I’m hoping I DON’T do.

I’m trying like, really freaking hard to stay calm about it. But it’s a lot easier said than done, I guess? One minute, it feels like everything’s gonna be fine. And then the next I’m thinking of all the possible ways I could fuck everything up (I’ve come up with 17 so far… but I bet there are more. Ugh!)

I just can’t screw this up. And not just because of all Meg’s cute friends either. I mean yeah, I still really, really wanna make them like me. Duh. That was the whole point of trying out for the talent show in the first place!

But they’re not the only people I wanna try and impress either.

My WHOLE family is gonna be there at the talent show. Omi and Opi, Lila and Jasper, Dev and Rubi… and my Mama and Papa too. And that might not sound like a big deal to anybody else… But to me, it totally is.

I don’t usually do stuff like concerts or recitals or plays or anything… So the last time everybody was together like that was way back when Mama was still pregnant with Lila. I was like 10, and I came in second place in that stupid science fair thing at school. I don’t even remember what my project was.

But I do remember how amazing it felt to have EVERYBODY there with me cheering me on. My whole family… It was the best thing ever. It felt so normal.

And I really can’t wait to finally feel that way again… Both sets of parents, my brother and sister, all in the same room. All there for me. Together. The way a family’s supposed to be.

I just wish it didn’t add so much more pressure though… Which I freaking hate. I’m already worried enough about what all those girls are gonna think of me. And now I’m gonna be worrying about my family too.

But I know I’m totally overreacting right now, aren’t I? I’m sure it’ll be fine. Rylie’s still been helping me after school a couple days a week. I’m really starting to get the hang of that song, I think.

And Meg’s been a huge help with how to deal with stagefright and stuff. Dev even taught me a few breathing exercises that are supposed to help you calm down or something. And I guess they kinda seem to be working?

I’ve just gotta keep my ‘eye on the prize’, or whatever that stupid expression is. I need to focus on getting through these next two weeks. No worrying about fucking up the night of the talent show. Or about what the hell I’m gonna do after… especially if I actually manage to convince those girls I’m good at guitar.

But hey, with all this XP I’ve been getting, I must be due to level up soon… Right?

And that’s gotta start making things easier…