Zombies really have taken over the world, huh? Or at least the free market economy. The clever German capitalists who designed this introduction of the omnipresent living dead to the bowling alley made a good move though. 1) They chose the perfect venue. If zombies were to infiltrate anywhere, we'd want them to infiltrate the lanes. It would be humanity's best shot at survival, as there amongst the chain smokers, alcoholics, and otherwise rotting regulars, they'd experience mass confusion and slowdown trying to distinguish our kind from theirs. 2) They chose the perfect marriage. Uniting bowling and zombies also unites Kingpin and Zombieland. All of the reasons why Woody Harrelson, no matter how many hemp tuxedos he tries to sell on QVC, will never be out of work, or lose his status as Grandmaster Pimp of Cult Classics.

Zombie head bowling balls: Scared pins go down, averages go up.