Wanting to get to know everyone whilst not reaching out to them and complaining about the shortage of cool people in the world.

I crave intense relationships. As in friendships. I want to connect with people. I want to find out what they’re like, how they think, how they would act in X situation and what they’re like with others of the human race.

I want to find people who have even just one thing in common with me so we can have a deep conversation, laugh, smile and enjoy talking about a common subject that’s meaningful to both of us.

I want to be able to give them advice, my own perspective and help them see that the problems they face can easily be tackled if you just look at it in a different way. I want to know what they’re feeling and analyse their thoughts and emotions together so both them and I can better understand how they work.

I want them to be open to my help and advice and want my input to have a positive impact on their lives. I want them to hear what I have to say, listen to what I have to say and maybe even use it to improve their everyday.

I want all this but I don’t show it to everyone in case it seems too forward. Just like I don’t want people to think I’m a creep so pretend I don’t remember that specific detail in a past conversation we had, even though that would probably be something that anyone would value in a friendship. I also don’t accept and delve myself into every single social situation that the world offers me and don’t show much of what I’m truly like, what I’m thinking or feeling, even though I am also trying to be myself every day.

I want people to want to know me and want them to reach out to me first before I am able to show them what I’m made of. Maybe it’s because my initial assumption is that they don’t want to know me and I feel needy for wanting to know them. I want them to show some interest in me before I do them, perhaps to protect me from feeling exactly that: needy and too forward. I need to know they are willing to and want to reciprocate, before I expose myself I guess, because not only am I more often than not interested in them but also, once I show them a part of me, I’m being vulnerable for them, giving away and showing them a part of myself, showing them a little bit of me.

I find a lot of people mundane but stay open-minded, give people a chance and try to get to know everyone I meet. I have extremely high standards for people and regard them as a mere acquaintance after I start to realise they’re not that interesting to me. Maybe I need to give the human race more of a chance, maybe question my usually “so-accurate” readings of people and definitely lower my expectations. Or maybe I should carry on wanting to find extraordinary people in this world and not just settle for mediocre relationships. Maybe I should not expect anything, take things as they come and just enjoy it when extraordinary people do walk into my life. Yeah, that sounds about right.

(BRIEF DISCLAIMER: just expressing my thoughts, am not trying to pity myself, not all INFJs will feel like this and not just limited to INFJ-ers out there woo)