The simplistic account is that eighty percent of women are having sex, and twenty percent of men are having sex – a hell of a lot of sex.

It kind of feels as if it is true, it is emotionally true, but it is not literally true. The number of men and women getting sex is not hugely different. More woman are having sex than men, and substantially more women are having regular sex with a regular partner than men are having regular sex with a regular partner (reflecting substantial levels of polygyny), but not hugely more, the numbers are not all that different.

What, however, makes the simplistic account feel true, is that ninety percent of men never get to pop a virgin. Every man, except for a rather small handful of men, are getting sloppy seconds. There is not a huge asymmetry as to how many men are getting sex compared to how many women, not a huge asymmetry as to how many men are in a sexual relationship as compared with the number of women in a sexual relationship. Rather the problem is that we don’t see virgins entering relationships with other virgins, and then having sex with each other. This is the huge inequality between men and women, and between the vast majority of ordinary males, and the small minority of males that females notice – the problem is that almost every women gets popped by a high status alpha male, while very few men get to pop a hot virgin.

Eventually the hot chick slides down the desirability ladder, and reluctantly deigns to enter a relationship with some male who is sufficiently lowly and unattractive that he is interested in having a relationship with her. And most sex, most of the time, takes place between men and women that are not as grossly mismatched as women wish that they were, with the result that most sex, most of the time, is not all that unequally distributed. Most sex, most of the time, is between men and women not too far apart in the desirability ladder, with the result that the numbers are not all that unequal. But by that time, by the time she has reluctantly decided to settle for someone like you, her count has become considerable.

If you have ever had sex with a virgin, you will be in no doubt about it. If you think she is a virgin because she told you so, she lied.

The number of female involuntary celibates is roughly similar to the number of male involuntary celibates. But the female involuntary celibate is celibate because she is an alpha widow. She is celibate because she once got a booty call from Jeremy Meeks, and now rejects all lesser males in the hope that one day she will get a second booty call from Jeremy Meeks. The male involuntary celibate is likely a virgin, and if he ever had sex, he got the dregs, while the female involuntary celibate got the cream.

Tags: Jeremy Meeks