



The following article is a /tg/ related story or fanfic. Should you continue, expect to find tl;dr and an occasional amount of awesome.

This article is awesome. Do not fuck it up.

An awesome piece of writefaggotry from /tg/ - showing that on /tg/ the magic still happens.

Inspired by a derivative of the copypasta that gave rise to the 4chan Archipelago, and written by /tg/ writefag 008, Stranded in Fantasy started on the January 18th, 2012, and completed on January 31st, 2012.

The story is copied here, but you can read it on the sup/tg/ archives, which are listed at the bottom of this page.

==Brief summary== (Spoliers erradicated)

It's about a group of humans from our world who get hypno-suckered into some plot-device portals that land them in a city in a world where D&D is reality. It is not glorified in any way - its eleven humans in a world of elves, dwarves, orcs and other humans, and they have no money, no powers (to begin with...) and are shit out of luck. They soon realize that not everything is sunny in a fantasy world and lines should be crossed for them to survive.

The Terrans (Transported Humans)

Map [ edit ]

A fully formated archive of the story is not currently available.

A partially formatted word doc is available here: https://mega.nz/#!l1cGQKyL!vKT6n6W7MLeJUMZrqL-u2RC2lKd7dOCYRnlWH6yVQ7k

For the narrated story https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=phtEvUYjIBA

Part 1 [ edit ]

Journal Entry 1 [ edit ]

Well, here I am. I don't know why I'm bothering to keep this journal, only a handful of people in this place will be able to read it when I'm gone. For peace of mind I suppose. Where to start. It was another typical day of doing nothing, trying to get work and keeping myself entertained. I'm not sure what happened, but suddenly there was a voice in my head telling me I had to prepare. Before I knew what was going on, a doorway, a portal opened up in my living room. Round, glowing and beyond, a city of some sort. It looked positively medieval. Stone and wood buildings, strange people, some not human. A fantasy world. Somehow I knew I had 30 minutes before it closed. It felt like a dream and perhaps that's why I went through. I thought it was a dream, it seemed the logical thing to do at the time. I don't know why. At least I had the presence of mind to grab what I could and not just hop through. What a catastrophe that would have been. So here I am, where ever here is. I guess I should find out and see what's going on.

Journal Entry 2 [ edit ]

What the fuck was I thinking? So here I am. In some fucking fantasy world. Magic and everything. Shortly after I arrived, that dreamy feeling fell off and the reality of the situation has hit. I'm stuck here and I don't know why. I'm not alone though, there are a handful of others in the same situation. We're all foreigners here, stranded and effectively homeless in this place with no idea why. Speaking of this place, It's called Rosenbridge. I have no trouble communicating with the locals, but I can't read their language. They use some squiggly shit that makes no sense to me. I think spoken language is just being translated for us at this point. Rosenbridge is apparently a town in a trade hub connecting several larger cities. Kind of a place were the different races of this world pass through. I've seen Elves, Dwarves or Gnomes, some lizard... thing and some others that I'm not entirely sure of outside of the more common humans. I'm kind of creeped out to be honest. Anyways, we're all camped out in some alleyway near the outer wall of the city.

Journal Entry 3 [ edit ]

Well, I just witnessed some magic. It was pretty spectacular, but I guess it's a common thing as the locals didn't seem to give mind. Some guy in robes doing some display in the town square. Burst of light, movement of hands and mumbling and boom. I'm not entirely sure what happened. Alex, one of the people that's in the same situation as me, was going to see if he knew anything about why we're here. Fucking wizards man. There's what I estimate to be several thousand people milling about the markets. I don't know why, but for the first time I feel intimidated by a crowd. I get an odd overwhelming feeling. I think it's stress. I may be starting to lose it. God knows Avery hasn't fucking stopped crying since we found her and gathered up in the alleyway.

Journal Entry 4 [ edit ]

Well, Alex's wizard friend had no ideas and didn't seem the least interested according to him. Fucking wizards. Anyways, caught some kid groping at my ass, I think he was looking for a coin purse. The local's don't seem to actually have pockets on their clothes, everything is carried in little pouches. Anyways, pistol whipped the little fucker off his feet and took off. I wish I had money, I'm starving and none of us have anything worth trading. Thieving or begging may be in our future, or prostitution if things get desperate. What the fuck is going on.

Journal Entry 5 [ edit ]

So Rosenbridge. It's apparently mostly built on some massive ancient bridge that's over a river leading to the ocean. Part of the trade routes coming through are by boat, this is apparently the stopping point as it gets too shallow or rapids or something beyond this. Spent some time at the waterfront. Managed to swipe some bread. It was rock hard and tasted terrible but fuck was I hungry. This is the first time I've come to know real starvation. It looks like the others have found something to eat. Someone, I think Max, said that there was a church that gave donations to the poor. We'll have to check that out.

Journal Entry 6 [ edit ]

There's some carnival in town today. Strange foods, acrobatics displays and showy wizards. Alex has been hanging around the wizards and observing. I think he's going to try and figure out this magic stuff. Best of luck to him. Anyways, checked out that church, it's a bunch of sun worshipers. They give some kind of oatmeal slop once a day to the poor. It had no taste but it was filling at least. The chick giving the handouts seemed surprised at the sudden influx of hobos in town. Namely us. We've decided to stay tight lipped about our origins for now. Don't need any more trouble. Hung around the carnival for most of the day but didn't have any coin for the real shows. Entertainment's been slim. My mp3 player battery has been dead more than it's been charged. The solar charger I brought with me is slow as hell.

Journal Entry 7 [ edit ]

Jason got mugged today while he was pissing behind some tavern. Lost everything. Luckily we found most of it in a heap by the waterfront. Unfortunately the screen on his Kindle is cracked now. Alex has been gathering up some stuff from just outside town. Grass, leaves, some kind of flower. He says he wants to try one of those carny wizard spells he spent all day watching. Some kind of ingredients along with vocal and hand motions are involved. We're not sure if the hand motions and vocal parts are required or just something for the show. I guess he'll figure out in experimentation. He has some hardon for learning the local's magic. I don't think we can, we're not from this world.

Journal Entry 8 [ edit ]

So some guard comes around our alley and starts bullying us around. Turns out he wants some people to work on the docks for a few copper coins. Most of us went for it. Money. I did as well. Backbreaking work moving crates and sacks and shit to and from boats and on to carts. My arms hurt and will probably hurt more tomorrow, but we've got money and it's not illicit money either. I think Amanda was just another day from whoring herself out to the locals. I think she's a bit too chubby for that to work out though. The locals are all malnutrition thin (peasants) aside from the rich/nobles/merchants which are a bit pudgy

Journal Entry 9 [ edit ]

Oh god what am I doing here? I've been working my ass off at the fucking docks all week just for a pittance and it's barely enough to survive. Plus I'm dodging thieves and guards looking for a beatdown all day and night. I hate this place. What the fuck was I thinking?!

Journal Entry 10 [ edit ]

So while I'm writing, sitting on the edge of the fountain in town, some guy comes up and seems incredibly fascinated in my pen. It's a bic ballpoint, blue. He said he was some kind of artificer and wanted to know all about it, so I gave him the basics. Ink in the tube drains out and on to the little ball. I'm not sure how they work beyond that. I sold one of my least chewed on spares to him for two gold coins. I think that's a lot.

Journal Entry 11 [ edit ]

Alex is in a coma. He tried doing that magic shit today. We sat down to watch.. at a safe distance and he did the hands thing and said the words, had the materials and then.. he grunted and fell over. He was out for a few hours before we realized he didn't just faint. We dragged him to the sun worshipers temple and they're taking care of him for now, they have some sort of clinic going on. I don't know the details. I spilled the beans to the priest, that we're from offworld. He got this weird look in his eyes and put his hand on my head and yelled Smite. I felt something but I don't know what. He apologized profusely afterwords, saying it was some kind of misunderstanding. Is he a paladin? Anyways, Avery is staying to keep watch on him over the night.

Journal Entry 12 [ edit ]

We're in hiding now. Apparently word got out about us. The local magistrate or vizier decided we should be rounded up. Ian, Max and Austin were nabbed and taken to the prison or dungeon or whatever they have here. I stole some clothes off a clothesline and we're going dressed as locals and hanging out in an old abandoned house on the other end of town. The locals think it's haunted and it does have a creepy vibe. It's a temporary solution though.

Journal Entry 13 [ edit ]

Amanda says she was up all night talking to a ghost that resides here. Some girl that was murdered by a cult of some kind long ago. In other news, Amanda isn't the only one losing it. I robbed someone today in an alleyway. I ran out of money and old starvation hit. Snuck up behind them and taser to the back. Ended up with a handful of silver coinage. That should keep us fed for a few days.

Journal Entry 14 [ edit ]

I haven’t heard from Avery in a few days so I went to see what was going on at that church. Alex is up and moving around, but he's still kind of out of it, having trouble speaking and whatnot. It's like he suffered a stroke. The priest person said they could heal it in time using their divine power, but that there would be a price for it, and not the kind of price you can pocket. The only explanation as to what happened that they gave was that magic was a dangerous thing to the untrained. So much for Alex's dream of becoming a wizard. At least the church is keeping him out of the hands of the guards.

Journal Entry 15 [ edit ]

Ran into that artificer guy today. He wanted to know more of the land I came from. Have to be careful about anyone overhearing what with the guards on the lookout for us. I didn't tell him much but I did sketch out a bicycle and the basics of how they work. He was fascinated and ran off with the page after giving me a few silvers. Bicycles, here. Imagine that. I don't think they know what rubber is though. I could be wrong though.

Journal Entry 16 [ edit ]

That artificer showed up again. He is running a caravan over to the next stop in the trade circle, some place called Wildlake and invited us all to come along as caravan guards. He knows the guards are looking for us and this is the best he can do to assist I guess. Most of us couldn't even defend ourselves but it gives us a chance to get out of this place. Avery and Alex are staying behind at that sun church.

Journal Entry 17 [ edit ]

Well, we've been given some shitty used leather armor and a spear and we're off on this caravan job. We're getting paid too, a handful of gold to boot, so as long as nothing horrible happens, we should be okay. We're with 5 other guards who are locals. I had no idea how to put on the armor, it was all straps and leather so I watched the locals put theirs on and imitated. I know I fucked up at some point, it doesn’t feel right. Anyways, this trip should be about 5 days at cart speed. There are 6 carts in the caravan and 10 of us on guard duty total, 5 of us foreigners and 5 locals, plus some 10 merchants, cart drivers and so on. There's several beast people things with us and one rowdy dwarf, but otherwise all human.

Journal Entry 18 [ edit ]

What the fuck am I doing here?! Why?! Why won't I wake up?!

Journal Entry 19 [ edit ]

So much walking. My legs ache, my arms ache, my feet hurt. Almost twisted my ankle. Hate this place. Us Terrans have been having an entirely different experience from the locals on this trip. The locals are enjoying the walk, chatting and spending the nights around the campfire telling silly stories of drunken bravery and local heroes. Us Terrans are around the fire, all cramped up, in pain, dealing with blisters and mumbling about all the things we miss of home. I can feel the emotional difference between both our groups. It's the oddest sensation. Bah, I'm just tired.

Journal Entry 20 [ edit ]

Dan's dead. He was one of us. I don't know much about him other than he liked to sing to his mp3 collection during the run. We couldn't even bury him. So we're wandering along when these green things come rushing out of the underbrush. Goblins. Panic. Everything goes to shit. Dan gets a gut full of sword before he can do anything. I manage to get out my gun and I don't know, I was panic firing I guess? I hit at least 3 of the little fuckers. I'm down 8 bullets. I have to be more careful. The goblins were driven off but there are other injured. We had time to loot the bodies but not bury Dan. Left at the side of the fucking road, stripped of everything, to be eaten by the fucking wolves or whatever.

Journal Entry 21 [ edit ]

We, the Terrans, held a small memorial for Dan. The locals didn't quite get why we were bothering for someone we barely knew. We divided his belongings amongst the rest of us. We should make it to Wildlake in two days. I hope we made the right decision, joining this caravan. The next town may be worse. It may be better. I don't know.

Journal Entry 22 [ edit ]

Had a bit of a scare today. Ran into a group of elven rangers on some hunt today. Almost mistook them for bandits, we're all a little jumpy. They seemed alright people I suppose, unless they really are bandits and just waiting for the rest of their guys. Anyways, we were going opposite directions from us. During all of this, I managed to get my tablet charged up with my solar charger and taught the artificer how to play Angry Birds during camp. He was entranced by it. I think he's starting to understand just how foreign we are. In the meantime, we practiced with some of the weapons we picked off the goblin corpses. The locals had a good laugh at us as we flailed around with blunted short swords.

Journal Entry 23 [ edit ]

Well, I figure we've been here a month now. I'm not entirely sure, I haven’t been keeping an accurate count and since I'm not writing every day, it's hard to estimate. We made it to Wildlake around midday. Contrary to my expectations, there is no lake involved. Apparently there was one here way back, but it drained out in some dungeon or mine collapse. It's slightly larger the Rosenbridge with a wooden outter wall. I saw my first airship today. A flying boat, parked in eastern portion of town. According to the locals, it regularly shows up every few weeks to pick up and deliver shipments from another kingdom. That's not all either. We passed a slave market on the way in. This is the first time any of us have seen anything like this. I'm not sure how I feel about this. It's perfectly legal according to the locals.

Journal Entry 24 [ edit ]

We got paid today. 5 gold. We're all staying in a local hostel/tavern for traders and their crews. We're bunked up with some odd people. They're all red and some of them look like they have a coral reef growing out of their chin covered in skin. Tieflings I suppose? Where the hell are we? As creepy as they look, they seem to be okay, and I'm not getting any bad vibes off them. One of them was a musician and played some tunes. Marcus got his hands on one of their instruments and started playing Stairway to Heaven. The musician took interest and the two of them spent the rest of the night exchanging ideas. On the other hand, the artificer kept asking me for new tech ideas. I think I'll show him the wonders of safety razor. God knows I'll need to get a replacement from somewhere when mine wears out.

Journal Entry 25 [ edit ]

Nope, still here, not a dream. Why isn't it a dream? I was in the tavern today when some bald elf chick covered in tatoos sits down next to me and says in the most serious tone ever, that my mind was like a locked treasure chest and that she must get inside. That's the weirdest pickup line I've ever heard. I quickly left. Too much weird for me. I can only take so much, the headache that showed up just before she did didn't help either. So more information about Wildlake. There is a flooded dungeon under the town, that ran under a lake that was once a burial mound of some so and so king from centuries past. Parts of it are unflooded and the adventurous raid it on a regular basis. You'd think there wouldn't be anything left to steal after all this time. It's also used as a shelter for the a-typical races that aren't welcome in town. The little inhuman ones like those fucking goblins.

Journal Entry 26 [ edit ]

With the trade run done, we're kind of out of work. Our money isn't going to last for very long. I poked around town looking for opportunities for awhile. What do I have training in that works here? Nothing. Marcus picked up a guitar at the market and is working as a bard in the cheap tavern and making a silver or two a night, and that's at least something. Amanda keeps wanting to go with him to sing, but she can't hold a note to save her life. I guess we're stuck doing remedial jobs any bumfuck shit farmer can do. We can't even read the damn writing, we're illiterate here. Maybe I'll be a professional thief. Ha, that'll be the day.

Journal Entry 27 [ edit ]

Well, I got a job sweeping up at the fucking slave market. Wonderful. Nothing like mournful stares and whispered pleas of help from dirty, barely clothed captives to keep the spirits up. I don't know what to think. At least I'm making some money, the pittance that it is. Did I mention they randomly get whipped? They use some whip that doesn't leave marks but apparently hurts them like hell. Who makes up this shit? Mike on the other hand, has caught on and captured the attention of some girl who agreed to teach him to read in exchange for...something. I don't want to know. He is trying to teach us what he learns. Handed down knowledge.

Journal Entry 28 [ edit ]

Airship is in town. Watched that for awhile. They couldn't come up with a better design than a flying boat. It apparently isn't sea worthy either so why bother? Maybe I could teach them aerodynamics. You'd think it would be obvious. Anyways, I'm starting to see slaves beaten in my dreams and it's only my third day. It's time for an occupation change. Anything else. I heard there's some call some help with one of the dungeon areas I might look in to. Why not? Maybe the guards will leave me alone. I made the mistake of showing them my drivers license when they asked for identification last night. Weirded them all out. Speaking of which, why the hell did I bring my wallet and car keys with me?!

Journal Entry 29 [ edit ]

Well, I got sucked in to some adventure thing going on. Hired with some locals to check out and clear a lizard creature, kobold, infestation of one of the dungeons. We're to head in within a few hours and see what's going on down there. Also on the team is a big burly guy who is also illiterate, a bored dwarf and a highly excitable elven wizard or sorcerer. I can't tell the difference yet. Luckily we didn't meet in a tavern because that would be too cliché. No, we met around the town fountain and got our “mission objectives.” I at least have the leather armor and shortsword from the caravan trip. That and my big knife from home and my Sig. I need more ammo. I need a source of ammo. I have 7 more magazines worth of ammo, 8 bullets each. Apparently there's going to be another guy joining us at the dungeon entrance. I guess we'll see what that's about. Anyways, I did ask the wizard about what happened with Alex. He just gave me the dangers of magic speech the sun priest did. Also of note, caught sight of that bald chick following me again. Kind of hard to miss her. She's good at causing headaches.

Journal Entry 30 [ edit ]

So we met up with a Paladin of some warrior god and hit the dungeon. He was a very...boisterous fellow. Lots of bragging. So this was my first dungeon. Everyone brought torches. I brought a flashlight. It's a camping thing, green power and all that. Solar battery and all. It should last a good 3 hours. So we go in and sure enough, kobolds. Ugly, filthy looking things, making weird lizard noises when they weren't speaking pidgin english or common or whatever. The dungeon was more or less just burial ruins, pretty straight forward. Looking back now, it was pretty dangerous, these things were out to kill us and we were out to kill them. What the fuck was I thinking? Wasted two bullets and learned that my big stainless steel knife was a piece of shit when it snapped in half upon hitting bone. The short sword did better but I'll be damned if I'm not clumsy as hell with it. The paladin gave me some hints and tips in the middle of a fucking fight because this is nothing for him. Anyways, I didn't get any injuries except some scrapes. I'm still fast on my feet and my reaction time is good. Found some stuff, some kind of silver chain necklace I found in the mud and some coinage the kobolds were hoarding. Do people actually sell them stuff? They seemed a little feral for trade. Also got paid 15 gold for the job. I don't know if I can do something like that again. Such stress, I can't describe it properly. Terror and thrill combined together

Journal Entry 31 [ edit ]

So I spent the last few days in the tavern, possibly getting lead or mercury poisoning. I'm surprised none of us have caught anything yet. I'm the only one who brought medical supplies, and all I had time for was a bottle penicillin. Stupid portal. Why did I ever listen to you? Anyways, Marcus got some apprentice deal under a Bard to try and learn Bard magic. As long as he doesn't suffer a stroke like Alex did, if it will even work. Who knows how different we are from the locals. Aside from that, I'm starting to learn to read the store signs from Mike's hand-me down teachings. It's a bit more complicated though, there's a simplified written language and a standard. We're apparently learning the simplified. I guess that's a good enough start.

Journal Entry 32 [ edit ]

That bitch got to me and I think I had an epileptic seizure. She showed up suddenly and grabbed me from behind. I know it was her, I felt it. I made for my taser and suddenly I couldn't think straight and went into convulsions. Next thing I know I wake up in the local temple. Some love and peace worshiper temple. Nothing was missing but I've got the headache to end all headaches and random nose bleeds. She fucking mind raped me and then dumped me off at the temple. What the fuck? Fucking psions. I'll get her. I know exactly where she is, why the fuck do I know exactly where she is, what did she do to me?

Journal Entry 33 [ edit ]

I got cleaned and rested up. Still got the headache. Paid a visit to Ms Psion. Brought my gun but in hindsight, I don't think I could have used it if I wanted to. We had a nice talk, not sure how much, if any of it, was real or manufactured. I'm pretty paranoid about it. I don't know what they can fully do. Going there was a bad idea. There was more than one. It's all kind of a blur. I do know a lot of talking was done but not a word was said. From what I can recall and managed to put together, they're part of some back door manipulators of the local guilds, manipulating towards their profits. I think the ideas I leaked to the artificer got out and that brought me to their attention and then they found something. Something I didn't know was there. Now I think I need them to learn to control it or go insane from increasing mental stress. Or at least that's what they want me to think. None of this makes sense.

Journal Entry 34 [ edit ]

It's not a headache, it's feedback. So much but no solitude to be found in the city borders. I slipped outside for a bit and the volume lowered to acceptable levels. I will have to return, maybe Marcus can play that song that puts me to sleep. He learned how. It was a mental ingredient that Alex was missing, he couldn't observe the state of mind he needed and the training was missing. I wonder how he and Avery are doing, or the others that were captured. I have to go back to her, she will teach me. I will make her.

Journal Entry 35 [ edit ]

It's been a few weeks I think. I learned to block it. The noise. Them. From then on, it's mostly intuitive. The advanced tricks come later, so they say. Having a logical mental grasp of things has certainly helped. They said I was their first otherplanar “wild talent.” Already I learned to decipher the feelings. Empathy I guess. It's created other side effects. I have trouble nearing the slave market, it's a literal pit of despair, so thick it's almost physical. Luckily the effect doesn't spread. Uh, while I was coming and going out of sanity during the week, Marcus picked up some magical Bard music. Just some simple stuff. Between my experience and his, I guess we can learn. There's hope for Alex yet if he ever regained full functionality. The others, Amanda, Jason and Mike have been poking around and found out about some academy or university quite a distance away that may have some answers for us. They apparently have some info on extra-planar travel. Might be a long shot but it's all we got.

Journal Entry 36 [ edit ]

We need quite a bit of gold for travel expenses. Much more than we have. I signed up on another dungeoneering expedition. Jason signed up as well. We joined up with a sorcerer and what I'm pretty sure was half the thieves guild pretending to be fighters. I didn't even know there was one. I suppose that's the way they want it. Apparently Jason is a pseudo apprentice to one of them. What the fuck. Anyways, we headed down to clear out some goblins and instead found a death cult. A dead death cult. They committed suicide, somewhat recently. There was a goblin, just the one though, and he wasn't a feral, he wanted to join. Whatever, I'm not the leader on this expedition. He smells though. Jason managed to pick out a few traps and got a few pats on the head for it from his thief masters and I'm pretty sure I got fondled at some point by every one of them while they were looking for my coins or something of interest. Suckers, I left it all with the others back at the inn. Overall load from the job.. The pay was cut in half since there was no Goblins. Loot off the cult was a handful of shitty quality daggers, a handful of coppers and a magical idol none of us wanted to touch. We rigged up some wood tongs, bagged it and sold it at the market for around 60 gold and some incense. We didn't pay the goblin, he can go fuck himself.

Journal Entry 37 [ edit ]

We all gathered up after I got my Kindle charged up and watched Strange Days. It was the only movie I had on it when I came, and the only movie any of us brought. It's a good movie but when you've been living out on this world for awhile, you notice the simple things. Oh look, they have proper shoes and their clothes have functioning pockets. Hey, cars. And so on. There were some tears as homesickness kicked in full force and then I picked up the overflow from the others. What the fuck was I thinking? I think that portal bullshit had a hypnotic effect or some limited mind control was used. The more I think about it, after what I learned.. But why bring us, we're random people with similar interests. It doesn't make sense. Anyways, a bit after that, I..”helped” Jason with some b&e work his masters were requesting he do.. for the experience. Now I'm not the best person and I admit I'd probably be doing it too if I didn't get caught up in the mental adventures of temporary insanity with Miss Bald and her skinhead friend so I'm not even going to complain. I guess I'm sliding on down the alignment scale. Desperation, real or imagined I suppose. So my part in this heist was feeling out if anyone was inside and then he does all the work, and I try and alert him if someone goes for the door. Alert in my case is to nearly knock him and myself silly. I'm still new at this, it's like painting with boxing gloves on. I'm not sure what the total haul was worth, but his masters paid him a handful of silver. I'm starting to wonder of this coinage really is gold, silver and copper. Might just be what they call it or maybe they're using a really impure mixture. I don't know. Not important I guess.

Journal Entry 38 [ edit ]

So two trips into the dungeon and I am apparently a dungeoneering pro according to the locals. Seriously? So I was approached while trying to grift some tourists about another run in another section of the crypt. Apparently it's the right season that the water level down there drops enough to allow access to some otherwise inaccessible areas. Jason and his handler are coming along with what I think is a gnome who wants to examine the construction techniques and a tiefling chick who was armed to the horns with whips. I'm going to have to get a torch for this, it's probably going to last longer than my flashlight's battery. Of course I'm not experienced in making a fire without a lighter. I'll figure it out. Maybe that's something else I can sell to the artificer. He's still working out the wonders of the ball point pen. Anyways, the expedition starts come sunrise.

Journal Entry 39 [ edit ]

Dungeoneering pro my ass. So we're all stuck in a big cylindrical room, about 15ft diameter and 20ft high. I'll start from the top. We entered and immediately ran into a kobold scouting party that was seeing if the area was habitable for them. Why can't they just build a fucking town of their own? We managed to chase them off. Found a few traps, got some cuts and bruises by a few and some minor burns from the extra fun time magical ones. I have to wonder why anyone bothers. It's only a matter of time before someone breaks through, all you're doing is wasting money on slowing down an inevitable intrusion. Not cost effective in the least. We found the previously flooded section and entered. Most of the traps here were disabled from water damage except a few of the amusing surprise pits that were now filled with easily crossable water and silt. Picked up a few unknown gems and some random baubles and decorations. Our gnome friend took sketches of everything we saw, from walls to doorway arches. Very fast hands. Finally we entered this room. There was a lever on a pedestal. Typical. The gnome seemed excited and walked right over and pulled it before we could check it out. The door slammed shut and that's how we got to be stuck in this room. The tiefling chick nearly broke her little jaw after the first hour. Everyone seems calm but I can feel the panic. It's creating a kind of feedback effect, not easy to ignore.

Journal Entry 40 [ edit ]

Still in the trap. Luckily we're not expecting the area to flood again for another few months. So we're all sitting around chatting it up. I got to regale everyone of the tale of the Quantum Lich who was trapped in a similar situation and went on imaginary adventures. Jason and I had a good laugh about it, the others were disturbed. So rather than sit around and wait for insanity or death, we tore apart the lever mechanism which went inert when the trap sprung and applied some mechanical engineering to it. Some of the rope that made it work broke. We figure this room was some kind of “airlock” leading to another chamber. We managed to repair the mechanism using one of the tiefling's whips and tricked it it into opening both doors with some luck. Tada. We took a vote and went further in. It's a good thing we did. While we didn't find mounds of gold and jewels, we found a small armory. Swords, daggers and armor, all in good shape, untouched by the flooding and rust. We cleaned the place out and headed back top side. Our market contact is selling off the loot and we got paid. Looks like we got a nice little mound of coinage and we all kept something from the loot. I traded in my shitty goblin short sword for a nice steel one. The gnome got his designs and seemed quite pleased, around the bruises anyways.

Journal Entry 41 [ edit ]

Got caught up with the artificer today. He finished several prototypes of ball point pens but couldn't get the right consistency with the ink. Chemistry or Alchemy as they call it here is not his strong point, so he's working with someone on that. In the mean time, he's working out which is easier, bikes or razors. The razor has lots of fine points, but the bike has moving parts. I suggested a Penny-Farthing style with the pedal mounted on the front wheel for ease. He's pondering it. I see many great business arrangements in our future. One thing at a time though. It's not like there's a patent office though, anything he figures out, anyone else can copy and there goes the profits. Learned a new trick. I can pull memories out of people now. It's very obvious what's happening though and it's quite tedious and leaves me exhausted. In other news, someone tried robbing me in an alley. Not one of the sanctioned thieves, just some asshole. Gave him a mind full and then a face full of taser when that wasn't enough. I ended up taking his money, his pants and one boot just to fuck with him.

Journal Entry 42 [ edit ]

The airship is in town today. Amanda is going to see about booking passage or at least how much it is to their main stop, which is about halfway to that university. From there.. well, we'll figure something out. We're all planning on going. We have to stick together. In the meantime, I'm experimenting with Mike and Marcus with some zap stone he picked up cheap in the market. It's magic, produces static electricity at what seems to be a constant rate. I think it's for wizard pranks or maybe simple traps. We're seeing if we can't use it as a faster method to recharge our batteries. My taser must be getting low, and it takes hours to charge my mp3 player, even longer for the Kindle or Amanda's Ipad using the solar charger, or that hand crank thing we got from Dan.

Journal Entry 43 [ edit ]

We have enough for the airship trip, but it's a no frills package and may be called upon to help move cargo around. We leave in two days. I haven’t actually ever been on a plane and here I am preparing for an airship ride. The trip should take 48 hours. Our experiments with the static stone didn't quite work out as well as we hoped. The electricity coming off it is in fact very random. We would need to set up some kind of transformer or something and I have no idea how to make one. Paid a last visit to Baldy. Why the hell did I do that again? Always a mindfuck with her. Literally. Also she keeps wanting me to shave my head. To hell with that. She did give me some tips on memory digging that should help, but practice makes perfect. It's like a muscle, it needs to be used. Translation: I gotta mind rape people to get stronger. What the hell have I gotten myself in to?

Journal Entry 44 [ edit ]

So here I am, standing on the deck of an airship, an aerodynamically improbable shape propelled by magic. Fucking magic. As near as I can tell, it's a converted cutter with the sails removed and some magic propulsion added in. Some kind of engine powered by elementals or something. It's certainly not sea worthy anymore as the bottom's been cut up into loading doors for cargo. Us Terrans are sharing a tiny, stuffy cabin barely large enough for us all. We're sleeping on the floor more or less. The ship is noisy, the wood constantly creaking from movements. On deck is better but we have to stay out of the way of the crew. The view is amazing though. We're hauling ass over some plains. Mountains and forests in the distance, passing over a few horse riders far below. They are navigating by a combination of standard ship navigation techniques, compass and sextant combined with a magic map. Not too sure of the details on the map, probably helps with their versions of latitude and longitude guesswork. Something is bothering me though, I'm picking up a lot of apprehension in the crew. I let the others know and we've been digging for info but they're being tight lipped. It doesn't seem directed towards us though, so I don't think they're planning anything nefarious.

Journal Entry 45 [ edit ]

A day and a half out and blam, the ship crashes. Found out what the crew was worried about. They were transporting some creature. It got free and set the whole underside aflame. The ship's enchantments started breaking one at a time. The captain managed to soft crash us. About 4 of the crew's total of 15 didn't make it. All us Terrans survived, but Mike has a broken arm and the rest of us are pretty banged up. We're doing what we can to treat the injuries. Whatever it was in the below decks either died in the fire or died in the crash. We have a long trip ahead of us on foot. We're loading up with all the supplies that survived and even managed to throw together a shitty cart to load up and transport the wounded. The area isn't exactly a haunted nightmare forest, but it's not exactly safe as the ones back home either. The Captain, a fiery woman, seems to think we can make it to Winterfield in a week if we don't dawdle. My request for a discount on the travel price was of course denied. Whatever. As long as we all make it. We Terrans are a bit better off than when we did our first caravan from Rosenbridge to Wildlake.

Journal Entry 46 [ edit ]

So we're kind of lost in the woods. The tree cover is too thick to take sun measurements for navigation, so we're kind of guessing. We at least know the right direction, between my and the captain's compasses. The woods are pretty quiet which probably means predators, but I don't feel anything out there. Marcus occasionally breaks out the guitar to play something inspiring. He's getting better at it and is managing to combine some Terran music with what I'm calling the bardic effects. It doesn't quite work right, so mostly we're hearing local traditional stuff. We've all been taking turns pulling the supply/injury cart, and pushing when it inevitably gets stuck. A few of the crew are ahead, picking paths through the trees and looking for the best ground to traverse until we find some kind of road. The Captain is certain there's an old trade road around here somewhere. We're zigzagging back and forth looking for it as we continue on to Winterfield. I tried climbing one of the trees for a better look, but didn't see anything other than more trees. So much green. According to the map, we should be in the woods for at least two days before we exit out, cut across some foothills and enter the northern plains. The crew is pretty superstitious. They keep telling tall tales of dark elves kidnapping people to their caves living in the woods, or cannibal witches or Druids powered on hatred and my favorite, the Woods Lich. He raises the dead as dryad tree warriors. I'd think it was all fun and games, but some of them are terrified by the prospect. It's like kids telling horror stories around a campfire to scare each other except it's grown men and women. Tonight we're going to tell our version. We're going to convert Hellraiser over to something they can understand.

Journal Entry 47 [ edit ]

Well, we ran into wild borderline feral forest elves. I picked them up when they started shadowing us and called them out. They weren't hostile, but extremely distrustful. They barely spoke English..common, but we did manage to get some directions out of them. They just want us out of their territory asap. We're a change to the status quo I guess. The whole thing could have gone a lot worse if one of the idiot crew were first to approach call them out. Fucking elves. I think Amanda has an elf crush to boot. My experience with them so far in general hasn't been all that good considering my time with Miss Baldy McMindrape. Anyways, by nightfall, we hit the trade road. It was further east than the map said, and it's in pretty bad shape. It's been flooded out several times and is heavily overgrown, but it's a straight route, if not disused. Apparently once the airship started moving cargo in days what would have taken months, the whole thing just shut down overnight. I hope they can acquire a new one, I doubt they had an insurance policy on it.

Journal Entry 48 [ edit ]

We're camped out at the edge of the woods for the night and will hit the foothills tomorrow. It should be easier going, but we don't exactly know what kind of dangers to expect. We all sat around and watched my Kindle copy of Strange Days again, including the crew. They obviously had no idea what was going on but the pretty moving pictures kept them distracted from telling stupid horror stories. I just hope they don't decide to burn us as witches come morning. We also have been getting in some weapon practice during our woodland adventure. I'm not as clumsy as I used to be with the blade as when I first started. Mike's taken extremely well to his rapier.

Journal Entry 49 [ edit ]

We got attacked. Hyenas. Gnolls and a few goblins. They initially charged in screaming, but gunfire sent them back. They continued with hit and run tactics for the rest of the day I'm down 6 more bullets. 48 rounds left. We lost a crewman and the Captain took a nasty gash across the arm and leg. She's riding the cart now. None of us have any medical training. I don't know how bad the wound is, but she's out of the fight. If she takes fever, I'll give her a penicillin and hope she's not allergic. Took a few beatings otherwise and had to repair the cart, but we're okay. We captured a goblin and he's pulling the cart for now. Picked through the mortally wounded after the raids. Got to practice my memory harvesting skills. I know more about that Gnoll tribe than I ever wanted to, and they all died in horrible agony, and I got a headache. I've come to realize I'm becoming a horrible person. Was this something Mistress Skinhead McTattooface planted in my head or is this just how I'm adapting to the situation? It must be adaption, I'm not the only one effected. Jason was laughing at their pain and was cracking jokes about it for the rest of the day to freak out our goblin slave. Speaking of him, he doesn't speak common so we named him Wendy. Overall loot from the attacks.. A long bow and some nasty looking arrows. One of the crewmen knows how to use bows, so he took it.

Journal Entry 50 [ edit ]

Surprise, I'm apparently in charge of this whole expedition now while the Captain is out of it. She's sleeping most of the time and the bleeding has stopped.. kind of. I don't even know when to change her bandages, just when they look bad? We don't have enough material for a lot of them. No rotting smells though..yet. So with the Captain out of it and the first mate dead in the crash, somehow the chain of command falls to me. I think everyone's taking my secret rampant and unethical abuse of empathy as some form of leadership. Well, here goes nothing. No sign of the Gnoll party today, but we keep catching glimpses miles behind us. Probably scouts. I hope we're not being pushed into a war party. The hills aren't exactly giving us a clear view of everything, too many places to hide, too much cover, so we travel on. We should hit the plains tomorrow. That may bring luck or more misfortune. What the fuck am I doing here?

Journal Entry 51 [ edit ]

No Gnoll attacks, they stopped following us when we hit the plains. One of the crewmen started getting real jittery. One of the big dumb guys. When pressed, he clammed up, but that shit don't work on me. This trip is taking longer than expected, even with the crash. I figure we'll hit Winterfield in four more days. At least there's that to look forward to. Hopefully we won't all get arrested upon arrival or worse. This isn't even the endpoint in our little trip, just the midway. We'll have to find a new group to travel with to this University place. The plains are nice, we can see if something is coming unlike the foothills. The terrain is flat enough that we can make good time over the trade road. I'm sure there's some kind of horrible magic snake or dire rats hiding in the grass somewhere. We'll see I guess. The Captain isn't doing much better, but stable. Bleeding's stopped but she has a temperature. I slipped her a penicillin. I hope this works, is this even the right time to use them? Figures that we'd end up with no one with any form of medical training. I'm sure Mike's arm isn't going to heal right. We'll have to get him to a temple healer asap. Same with the Captain of course.

Journal Entry 52 [ edit ]

Found out what was bothering the big guy. Nomadic barbarian tribe. He's an exiled member of course, headed over to Winterfield and took up an occupation. I don't know what he was exiled for, but they're pretty pissed to see him, and us because we're with him. We managed to talk them out of killing us on the spot and we're under their custody until they decide what to do with us. There's around 150 or so of them that I've counted so far. They move in a huge migratory loop around the plains, following the wildlife and weather year after year. We did manage to get their healer to assist with our wounded so there is that. He's using a combination of some kind of magic healing and holistic medicine with lots of silly ritual that I'm sure isn't really part of it. At least I hope it isn't. From observation, I figured that they're ancestor spirit worshipers along with a skygod that may or may not be the same figure as the sun god in a different mask. It's hard to tell. I'm not about to announce my disbelief in the divine on this world, as things like that tend to go all wrong. Their young warriors dope up on some local plantlife and visit the ancient grave sites, experience something and then participate in a hunt. There's some kind of cannibalism involved as well, their greatest warrior gets eaten when he passes and the same goes for the medicine man and his replacement when the death comes. They don't seem to be experiencing the shakes, and is apparently a sin to eat anyone else.. so I'm going to try and not be too worried.

Journal Entry 53 [ edit ]

The Captain is back on her feet and thanked me for not fucking up too badly, and Mike's arm is doing better from the healer's treatment. That's the good news. The bad news is that after today's negotiations.. we get to take part in the Barbarian hunt. The worse news is that we're the prey in this hunt. We have a 4 hour head start. We're ditching the cart and carrying what supplies we can. It starts at sunrise. We have 8 young warriors in the chase, and some older ones just behind them in case they fail. We're not expected to survive. Mr Exile is ready to accept his fate. I don't want to die tired. I won't. Not after all of this.

Journal Entry 54 [ edit ]

Rained all day and we ran. Rained into the night and we ran. Didn't even know I could run this long. Desperation. Separated from the others but I kept running. When sunlight came, one of those assholes was on my tail. They have fucking horses. Fucking Cheaters! Nearly got trampled. He got off his horse to finish me. I let loose with everything. There's nothing left up there now, he's blank. I don't think he even knows what he is anymore. Can barely think, bleeding from nose, dizzy. Hiding in a crevice, my legs were starting to lock up. Need to get moving asap.

Journal Entry 55 [ edit ]

-4 bullets.

Journal Entry 56 [ edit ]

Met up with the others at night. 3 Crewmen are gone, Amanda's dead. Speared. We're taking a break. We can afford a short breather. Mike did.. something. He flipped the fuck out and started talking to thin air and next thing I know he's throwing around fucking black fire and took down one, injured another. I think he made a deal, a Warlock deal. He won't talk about it but he's ashamed and terrified of whatever he agreed to, but fear of barbarian death overrode whatever that was. We'll talk about it once we get out of this situation.

Journal Entry 57 [ edit ]

We ran into a Winterfield guard patrol with the barbarians on the horizon. They pulled back and the guards had enough compassion to help us. We were escorted back to town and currently sitting in a tavern. I ache everywhere. Amanda's gone. Another one of us down, dead on the side of the fucking road again. We're all dead quiet, the surviving ship crew and Captain. We're numb. I'm not going to sleep well for awhile, and Mike's seriously fucked up. He still won't talk about it. We're going to hold a memorial tomorrow for Amanda and the other crewmen. I didn't even know their names. I feel like I'm forgetting about something. Wendy! What ever happened to that fucking goblin, we left him at the barbarian camp. He's probably dead.

Journal Entry 58 [ edit ]

I keep waking up, thinking I have to start running, or that there's a barbarian about to kill me or not sure where I am. This isn't good. PTSD? Fuck. We held a memorial for Amanda. Well, welcome to fucking Winterfield. It's a large city, reminds me of medieval France in architecture. It's a bit chilly here, but it is farther north. The locals are a bit distant. Apparently the barbarians are a problem for the area and the real reason the trade road shut down, and they switched to an airship. Well, hope they can build another one. The local royalty is too fearful of sending an army out to hunt the fuckers down like dogs. No, he's fine with the way things are. Calls it balance from what I hear. As much as I'd like to just settle down here for awhile and recover, we can't really. We all agreed. The barbarians are set up to the south west and we need to move north east. If we wait here too long, they'll move further up their migratory path and it'll be too late. We have very little money. Jason is checking in with the local thieves guild, because that's apparently a thing he has to do now. I did some checking around and there is a caravan heading north to a town called Brightly. According to the map, we can get to the University from there. I'm starting to understand how this University thing works, and why it's so far out. If you get there, you've proven yourself apparently. Too late to turn back. We'll take a week to rest, gather supplies and then head out with the Caravan. Where to get the money? Looks like I'm back to tasing people in alleyways and helping Jason b&e. What am I doing with my life?!

Journal Entry 59 [ edit ]

Those fucking barbarians. They dropped off the desecrated corpses of Amanda and the crew on the doorstep of town for all to see. They'll pay for this, for everything. Motherfuckers. They'll at least get a burial now. At least there's that. I'm so fucking pissed I don't know what to do. I accidentally lashed out at a few people mentally. We just wanted to pass through but those fuckers wanted to have their fun and now people are dead. Lives ruined. For what? I don't know anymore, I don't know. Anyways, I helped Jason nick some items he can fence and we'll see what else we can do to grab some money.

Journal Entry 60 [ edit ]

We didn't get as much as I had hoped, so we're going to have to expand our horizons. This isn't really a town for adventurers, no nearby dungeons or anything, just asshole barbarians. Marcus is making some money, barding it up in the taverns at least. The people are too distrustful to be grifted easily. Mike is totally against a warlock magic show, and to be honest, it wouldn't be appropriate. I'm not exactly a criminal mastermind. We can always hold up a trade caravan. Say, the one we're traveling with. That might be too many people though. We're not murders and we're not bandits. We're just poor. Yeah, that's a great rationalization. I apparently have no moral issues with completely fucking over the locals. I think it's because I don't recognize them as.. us. “We're Terrans, we're better than you!” mentality. I don't know what to do. I don't, I just don't know. Would I have been like this if we stuck around Rosenbridge? What happened with Alex and Avery, or Ian, Max and Austin. Are they even still alive? I can't think and my mind is starting to leak. I need rest.

Journal Entry 61 [ edit ]

Well, Jason came back from the guild with a job offer. We can make nearly twice the money we need with a single job. That job of course is to assassinate the king. He's not a popular man around here. Of course we're not exactly assassins. The fact I'm seriously considering this job shows just how far I've slipped. I've talked with the others and they're all for it. Marcus explained it best with Spock logic. The needs of the many (us, and our need of money) outweigh the needs of the few (the king and his need to live.) It's fucked up logic but on the good side, maybe his replacement will do something about the fucking barbarians. We got decided to take the job. Jason picked up a map from his guild and we're going to do some planning latter tonight. In the meantime, we're attending Amanda's burial. Partially to make sure they don't fuck it up. She's been through enough.

Journal Entry 62 [ edit ]

So the castle has 124 rooms spread across 4 floors. The king's chamber is on the fourth floor with a single entrance and access from a forward and rear balcony. We figure the interior is loaded with the royal guards. Going through the front door is out, using a balcony entrance is dangerous. We poked around the market to see what resources we can get our hands on. No magic flight rods or anything like that unfortunately. The best we can get out of the thieves guild is some rope, but it's quite a distance to climb. We could use it for a quick escape though. Too bad we don't have a sniper rifle, his throne room is nearly level with the inn roof half a mile away and has a clear window. How to get in a heavily guarded castle. Can't imitate the guards, they don't use face masks and probably all know each other. There are no silly royal parties scheduled either. The king's schedule is pretty simple. He wakes up, eats, sits in the throne and listens to the local woes, around lunch he quits and putters around with his mistress and then official kingdom business until dinner, then sleeps, then repeat. The afternoon court is apparently an open affair, I'll see about doing some recon tomorrow.

Journal Entry 63 [ edit ]

Okay, the castle isn't as bustling as I thought it would be. Went in with Marcus and observed court, which was a few hours of peasant complaints, hilariously one sided criminal trials and the local gossip hour. Apparently this kind of thing is not common with the other kingdoms, it's just that there are no nobles in town, so the king has an open court so he can pretend he's important. He's not even married and his mistress is an ugly half orc. Well, ugly face but she's got some hot curves. I bet he uses a cloth sack. Anyways, I think our best opportunity would be to go in during court, slip away at the end and hang out in one of the unused castle rooms until night and then do the deed. Marcus wanted to help, but he's our public face and he shouldn't get involved. Mike will be waiting near the castle in case we need assistance in escaping the grounds. Just me and Jason. Court starts in a few hours, so we'll begin project KingSlayer then.

Journal Entry 64 [ edit ]

Well, it didn't go as planned but it didn't go entirely bad either. We slipped off on our way out of court and occupied a dusty room in the east wing. Poked around for a bit, found a few silver coins laying around. A few hours after nightfall we moved out. Made it to the fourth floor of this wing which is mostly unused. Only had to slip past a couple of off duty staff. We had to put down one nosy cleaning lady. She's still alive. I tried a new trick on her, a kind of memory loop. Not sure it worked but she casually walked out of the room and into a wall, knocked herself out. Good enough I guess. She didn't get a good look at us at least. Did some climbing around outside to get to the balcony and we were in the king's chamber. Just like that. Then we sat there for a half hour staring. I couldn't do it. Jason finally maned up and put a pillow over the king's face and slit his throat out before he could begin to struggle. Got kind of an adrenalin high after that. Grabbed some things from the room, some coinage, some magic looking baubles and rappelled off the balcony using rope. Then we got caught. Plowed right into a guard and the one of the gardeners making out. I put down the guard before he could fumble his pants back on to get at his sword, and Jason took down the gardener. I don't feel good about this job at all.

Journal Entry 65 [ edit ]

We got paid and set up with a caravan heading out to Brightly tomorrow. I feel like shit. We officially crossed the line and are now murderers. Everything in town is in chaos. Guards are raiding all the shady hideouts and arresting anyone they think is shady looking. We're hanging out in one of the more popular inns to try and blend in to the crowd. We don't blend well. Anyways, there's no royal heir to assume the throne, so the advisers are working out what to do. Maybe they'll invent democracy. Who am I kidding, it'll be a military dictatorship until whoever names themselves Emperor. In other news, I've gotten good enough at reading to kind of read a book. It wasn't very interesting or very long. It was about some historical battle centuries ago in the area. Turns out the barbarian tribe is remains of a rival kingdom that was wiped out. Fucking barbarians. Anyways, time to resupply for the trip. I could use some new clothes. At least a new shirt, my jeans are holding up okay. My shirt has changed color several times now, from blue to brown to red and now it's gray and is covered in sloppily repaired rips and tears.

Journal Entry 66 [ edit ]

So we're passengers in a caravan heading to Brightly. It's supposedly a safe route. I've heard that before. Figured out what the magic things we stole from the king's chamber do. We got a poison immunity necklace and what appears to be an immovable ring. Like an immovable rod but as ring. It's a plain gold and luckily, bound to this gravity sphere, otherwise, who knows where it would zoom off to. Why would anyone make this is beyond me. Maybe it was an accident. Anyways, the caravan is made up of about 15 carts and was hastily put together once the local trade guild found out about the airship issues. We have a crew of 40 or so people: hired guards, horse and ox drivers, merchants, their support staff and passengers. The caravan leader is a civilized orc woman. She's got to be at least 6 foot 5. Now I've never been into muscle girls, or green skin for that matter but damn. She's apparently made a name for herself with the locals and well trusted as some kind of trail blazer.

Journal Entry 67 [ edit ]

It's been raining for the last few days. It's slowed us down considerably with muddy roads, carts getting stuck and fallen trees. Why don't they pave anything? The Romans did it. Spirits would be lower if not for Marcus's music. Did some chatting with the merchants. Seems Winterfield has no real exports, they just import everything they need, which is most things because of their barbarian problem. How do they afford it? Exporting their leftovers to Brightly for an even higher price. Brightly is apparently even more isolated. It's a lumber community, harvesting trees, producing wood products but lacking large farm space and anyone else to trade to, so everything they make comes and goes through Winterfield. With the airship down and the Barbarian problem, this entire arm of the trade network is cut off. Too bad they don't have trains. I'm not even sure how to make a steam engine. I know the science behind it of course. If we ever get back to Wildlake, I'll have to hit up the artificer. Or maybe find another one out here, invent a magical monorail. Wouldn't that be funny. Oh great, Marcus was reading over my shoulder and is now playing the monorail song.

Journal Entry 68 [ edit ]

Well, the rain stopped just long enough for a kobold raid. A whole shit load of the little fuckers. 3 of the caravan guard are dead, many injuries. Twice as many kobolds were brought down and the rest scattered. They got away with several bags of clothing from one of the carts. From their mental state, they were kind of desperate for anything to help with the coming Winter in a few months. I used to wonder what would drive someone to do something like that, and now I know. I've been put in that situation but with even less important reasons. No point in dwelling on it though. So we should reach Brightly either tomorrow or the day after depending on the weather. Luckily I've been managing to keep my notepad dry the whole time. Caught one of the merchants trying to read it last night when I set it aside to eat. Yeah, he couldn't read it. That's one thing we got, a language the locals can't read. Speaking of the locals, I'm pretty sure Marcus did the bard thing and got lucky with one of the caravan girls. Not sure which. Maybe it was more than one? I hope that anti poison ring also does diseases.

Journal Entry 69 [ edit ]

We made it to Brightly a few hours after nightfall. The city gates are closed, so we're camped just outside, partying like gypsies on making it with minimal losses. There is a massive forest around this place, and from what I gather, they're clear cutting the forest nonstop and processing the wood, but it's growing as fast as they can cut it. Magic woods of the unhaunted variety from what they say. Rumor has it that there are a bunch of dyrads inside that are churning out trees to keep the people from cutting deeper into the woods where their special trees are. Just rumor though. I'm willing to bet there's some horrible evil locked away out there. That's how it usually is. Or maybe the horrible evil and the dryads are working together to get rich off the lumber industry. Who knows.

Journal Entry 70 [ edit ]

I must have drank more than I thought last night. Woke up with a fresh tattoo on my arm from one of the merchant girls. She says it's a magical symbol for courage. Yeah bullshit. We have that joke on my world too. It's not in common and just looks like a fancy shape and not bad looking I guess, whatever. So Brightly isn't what I was expecting. It's not a human town. Reptile people. Dragonborn maybe? Not the shouting kind, though they are loud. Boisterous. At least they're friendly. The trade caravan is doing their business and heading out tomorrow. Us Terrans in the meantime need to plan the next leg of our amazing odyssey. This university is part of a city named Aellyn and it is to the east, almost dead east. There is no trade route there. They are self sufficient and considered one of the larger kingdoms. And prefer not to deal with other kingdoms if they don't have to. Isolationists. I hope they like offworlders.

Journal Entry 71 [ edit ]

Well, the caravan is gone. We're currently the only humans in this city which means we can't pull off anything shady. We're also getting the special treatment. Lots of attention, sometimes not always the good kind. So we're planning over a map, working out our next expedition. Aellyn is a week or more away on foot and we'll have to cut over the edge of a small mountain on the way of we take the most direct route. The locals helped fill in some of the blank spots on the map for this area but there are still a lot of unknowns. The cold weather is coming in a few months so we can't dally around. Since we'll be passing through the middle of nowhere, we probably won't have any trouble with some of the bandit races like goblins or kobolds and the terrain isn't suited to roving barbarian tribes. My best bet, if there is anything out there, wild elves or a crazy loner wizard. Otherwise, probably be dealing with large and possibly magic animals. Money isn't a problem yet. We still have quite a bit from the King job, and we made more selling that weird ring. Suggested to the locals how they can use it in their lumber business as floating o-rings or platform base of some kind. We're going to wait a day and then head out. Too many non humans is starting to creep me out.

Journal Entry 72 [ edit ]

Well, we're on the road again. Not really a road though, more like a small infrequently used path used by crazy adventurers that could easily be confused with a goat path. What I wouldn't give for an atv. Camped out in a clearing for the night. Dinner consisted of dried meat dried fruit. It wasn't bad. Needs salt. Something that's pretty rare here. How we take such things for common back home. Seasoning is something only the rich have here. Sugar is another thing. I haven't had any sweets in god knows how long. Chocolate. Do they even have chocolate here? Mint is another thing. If I ever get home, I'll have to remember to bring some candy next time a portal opens in my livingroom. Candy and a shotgun. And bags of ammo. And a fucking ATV.

Journal Entry 73 [ edit ]

Well, we've been captured by kobolds. The same ones from the caravan raid. They aren't entirely hostile this time, and I don't think they recognize us. Just more humans to them. I can tell it's them from the free floating memories. Kobolds are very... it's hard to explain in words, but they kind of project their minds everywhere in a non telepathic way. It makes reading them as easy as staring at a painting. Some of them speak common. They couldn't decide if they should ditch us and continue on their way, rob us and leave us dead or take us with them as hostages. They are kind of wandering aimlessly. They left their previous..village? Tribe? To expand. They got lost and don't really know how to survive on their own without banditry. We are trying to make a deal with them. They let us go and we teach them the basics of construction, engineering and farming. They can found their own village and not have to worry about getting stabbed in the face just to eat.

Journal Entry 74 [ edit ]

Well, the kobold high command has taken to our offer and is now escorting us some of the way to Aellyn. We've begun telling them about farming and construction basics. Simple stuff that they've apparently never had to think about living in a cave. They are catching on pretty fast though, I'll give them that. You just have to find the right way to explain it to them, and in terms they'd understand. Their first few attempts are probably going to be a catastrophe, but they apparently don't give up easy when they get an idea in their head. Any information we tell them spreads throughout them at a pretty fast rate. I guess they like gossip. They still smell terrible.

Journal Entry 75 [ edit ]

We're crossing the edge of the mountains now. It's so cold up here. We're probably a good mile off sea level. The kobolds are all wrapped up in their stolen clothes and some are carrying around burning home made torches for warmth when we're on the move. I'm wearing everything I own. Assuming we don't run into any trouble, we should be back down by tomorrow. Mountain climbing is a whole new experience for me. My hands are probably going to be covered in blisters tomorrow, if not from pulling myself up the rocks, then helping the damn kobolds. Since they've gotten to know us, they've gone from menacing bandits to friendly puppies in disposition. Things would probably be worse off if Marcus wasn't strumming along most of the time, keeping our spirits up. Mike's been pretty quiet, still won't talk about who or what he made his warlock pact with, or the terms of the deal. The emotions coming off him are troubling though. Depression. I've been giving him mental nudges to try and snap him out of it but all I'm doing is keeping him from sliding further down.

Journal Entry 76 [ edit ]

Still in the mountains. No big issues, it just got darker out than usual due to cloud cover. We're held up in the remains of a crashed ship. A crashed ship in the mountains. It's been here awhile and doesn't have the extras that the other airship had. So how did it get here? Magic probably. Magic is always the answer. It's a slave ship. The busted remains of the hold is full of chained up, frost covered skeletons. We made damn sure they weren't magic skeletons at first. Just the regular kind. There's no loot here, whoever survived took everything worth taking with them, or it was stripped by passing adventurers. It's warmer inside so we're staying the night and should be on our way come morning. Tried my hand at writing and put a message on the wall in common stating our names, party size, date and where we were going, a note of our passing. It occurred to me afterwards that I used an Earth year and not the local year. How long have we been here again?

Journal Entry 77 [ edit ]

We made it out of the mountains. We're camped at a small river, only four feet deep at crossing. We had to help the kobolds cross though, so we're all pretty wet. None of the gear got soaked though, luckily. They like the area and it is pretty good place for them to set up their koboldville experiment. Big open area, some woods not far away, a fresh water river and a lake less than a mile away. They weren't sure what to call it, so I suggested Chicago. Because it's funny. We're splitting off from them come morning and heading on our own. According to the map, we have a few more days travel through some woods and then Aeyllin should be in sight. This fucking trip better have been worth it. We've lost so much and gained so little for it so far. Anyways, we're spending the last night dumping as much info as we can on the kobolds and hopefully it works out for them. Sure they're creepy little lizard/dragon people, but they're nice once they ditch their distrust. Not that I'd want one living near me, they still smell, even after they bathe.

Journal Entry 78 [ edit ]

So we've been tromping through the woods for the last few days and suddenly breach the forest edge and plow right into another group of adventurers. They briefly mistook us for bandits but luckily no one was injured. They were heading away from Aeyllin and on their way to some burial tomb/doom maze for loot. We updated our map. Ours had Aeyllin in the wrong place, it's further north. Apparently the city has hundreds of farms stretching for miles to the south, and there's a mine/quarry on the north end. We're in farm country. I'm not expecting any problems, we have a well traveled and patrolled road to follow with several taverns along the way for the farmers. It'll be nice to have some cooked food for a change. And some booze.

Journal Entry 79 [ edit ]

We're in our first tavern for the night about half a day from the city. It's got a few rooms we can use. Beds, Yes! Picked up some local history. Aeyllin used to be an isolated elf city way back when, many centuries ago. Used to have a bit of an Aztec flavor to it from hearing the description. Then the place gets flooded with refugees from some war. All manner of races moving in but mostly humans, and the elves, in their short sighted compassion, granted sanctuary. Well, they got mostly outbred almost immediately and now it's a mostly human/half-elf city with spatterings of other races. The only traces of the old culture are some of the more ancient buildings in town. The old forests cleared away for construction and then farming. Sure enough, it has that university we've been looking for in the middle of it. My expectations have lowered since hearing about it though. Everyone has such great things to say about it but they themselves have never been there and they're always saying the same things. Propaganda. The good news is that there are airships there, so if we need to leave, it should be a much easier trip, if not more expensive. Well, either way, we're going to rampage the shit out of that university library if we have to.

Journal Entry 80 [ edit ]

Welcome to the wonderland that is Aeyllin. Well, we're in the city. Probably a quarter of the population are magic users of some sort, mostly low talent. We're staying in one of the larger inns. Marcus is staying free as long as he's working as the inn's nightly entertainment. The city is larger than I expected. There must be hundreds of thousands of people here. Whole districts stretch on for miles. It's far larger than any city we've seen so far. There are about 12 districts. We're in the old city, which is the central district, it makes accessing the other districts easier as it's set up as a giant wheel and we're in the hub. Government buildings are scattered all over, non centralized. There is a king, it is a kingdom, but no castle or court. He leaves the running of the city to his advisers and only steps in when he wants something specific to happen. There is almost a public education system (only available to merchant class and up), a local postal service, semi-proper sewage and garbage disposal (they still dump it in the river, just not inside town and down stream) and church sponsored health care. Several churches are sponsored here and to stay competitive, they’ve lowered their healing rates to free for citizens. At least that's my guess. So we can see the university from here, it's off in the 2 o'clock district, pretty big and lit up with magic glows. We're heading in there tomorrow. Today we're just resting and getting situated. My only complaint about this place is that everything is gray. The roads, walls, buildings. Everything is gray stone from the quarry. Granite. That means the city is one giant radiation sink. Wonderful.

Journal Entry 81 [ edit ]

So we're in the university. Getting in was easy, we just had to register with the administration. They wanted race, name and where we started from. Rosenbridge I guess. We got a long speech about the rules. No taking anything off campus and no wrecking stuff basically. They were expecting us to be students, but that all changed once it slipped out that we're offworlders. Suddenly we're subjects. So we have an agreement, they help us dig up any information that we can find in their library system and in exchange, they'll study us in non harmful ways. So that's what we did today. We got separated. Poked, prodded and aura sampled. I spent more time with my clothes off standing in front of weird magical devices and having strange diagnostic spells being thrown at me than anything else. I did find out what that tattoo on my arm says. It's in some Draconic script. It means “The.” It could be worse I suppose. Currently we're in the library. While we did manage to learn to read, we're still having trouble with the more complex books, we we have requisitioned an apprentice wizard to help. Nice girl in her early 20's, wit as sharp as a knife. So we are researching planes walkers, traveling, off planes visitors and mysterious talking portals. A written language expert did show up to see our written language, but it's new to him. I wrote up a sample for him, The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog, for him to look into. We keep getting random people visiting, apparently our arrival has created a stir. Not everyday they get lost offworlders I guess.

Journal Entry 82 [ edit ]

So there have been many offworld visitors recorded across the centuries. Some came as tourists, some came to conquer, but they all came and left under their own power. No tales of anyone being enticed through a portal from any world remotely like Earth. No talking portals either. Why the hell are we here? There's still a shit load of stuff to go through so maybe we'll come up with an answer eventually. Anyways, had a talk with our assistant about what happened to Alex back in Rosenbridge. Apparently strokes are one of the many things that can happen when a spell is cast wrong. It could have been worse I guess. We could have really used Alex and Avery on this stupid adventure. Or Dan. Or the ones imprisoned. Fuck. We should do something about that. We'll go back to Rosenbridge one day and we won't be scared, lost and helpless this time. Then we'll deal with those fucking Winterfield barbarians. So speaking of that, we are invited to attend some of their courses. They have something for nearly everyone, kind of. They actually have some psions around, and some courses for the more magical aspects of Barding and Mike really wants to dig into that Warlock course, find out exactly what he's in for. Not sure what Jason's going to learn though. I don't think they teach grand theft here. Maybe he can resume his apprenticeship at the local thieves guild. He's already checked in with them.

Journal Entry 83 [ edit ]

That was incredibly tiresome. Psion class involves sitting in a circle and just mindfucking the shit out of each other while the Professor or Master or whatever he wants to call himself observes and keeps things from getting out of hand and repairing any damage. It's to build strength, learn to adapt defenses and so on. Got tested for telekinetics but got nothing. Might not be ready for that, or maybe I can't do it. Marcus apparently taught the master bard some Earth music. Not sure what Mike was up to, but he was white as a sheet when we met back up. He won't talk about it, but his mind was screaming “demon summoning” at me. Fantastic. Spent more time digging through the books. There was a talking portal in some dungeon, but it spoke riddles and wasn't trans-dimensional. In other news, the master artificer showed up and took a good look at our gear. I gave him a bicycle sketch and hinted at so much more in exchange for figuring out how to keep our electronics charged. Whispers of steam engines touching his mind ever so slightly, mental glimpses of aircraft and cars appearing and fading like a dream. I'm getting better at this shit.

Journal Entry 84 [ edit ]

So much philosophical bullshit involved in this class. At least there's no homework. It would be amusing if there was. “Go home and mindrape someone. Exam tomorrow.” Marcus is having the time of his life, and even Mike is starting to relax. Jason's been away quite a bit, says he's learning the craft. So we finished tearing through the archives. Nothing we can use, even the big directory of planes had nothing. Our assistant got some approval and with help, tried summoning a fucking devil to get some answers , but it snapped up tight at the sight of us and wouldn't give up anything. It didn't even want to deal. What the fuck? What does that even mean? I'd be in a worse mood except the artificer master reworked our little static stone a bit and we can use it to charge things! We watched Strange Days again and listened to music. Got Amanda's Ipad charged up and took a look through it. She had brought a shit load of farming information with her and never said a thing about it. I wonder how useful this information would be?

Journal Entry 85 [ edit ]

Since we're kind of students, we were invited to stay in the university housing. We took it up because it's saving us money and meals are included. It's a huge underground apartment complex with enough rooms for all the professors, students and staff. Around 400 rooms of varying size. We're put with the students of course. Back in college again. We have such things to teach them. Beer pong for instance. At least that was what came to mind, but no, the place is dead quiet. No fun allowed. More class. Wandered town for awhile and saw some of the sights and then hung around the market. I think this is the first time in awhile that we didn't have some immediate goal to shoot for. This is it, we made it here. Now what? If we can't find a way home, if there is no way home, we'll have to settle somewhere and live out our lives. Radiation aside, this is the nicest place we've been in. What do I want to do with my life? I've certainly gained new skills. I'm sure I could make an excellent dungeon interrogator or mind thief. Blackmail artist maybe. Always with the evil. Maybe because it's all there is aside from peasantry. I'm not a fucking peasant and my skills certainly make lying, cheating and stealing easy. What the fuck.

Journal Entry 86 [ edit ]

We gathered up and talked. I brought up our future and we made a plan. We're going to head back to Rosenbridge after we're done here. Did some checking around and the best way back is to circle around the other way. Take an airship to Ashvale and from there, hop a ship to Kinild beach and if we're lucky, take another airship to Rosenbridge, if not , ride up to Wolf lake. From there we should be able to hop on the trade network to Rosenbridge from there. About a month's journey. Not exactly fast, but it looks to be safer than the way we came according to some people we asked. My only concern is that the some of the area on my map says “beware, orcs.” I was told that has been taken care of, that they had been pacified in a war. Always using that word, pacified. I don't like the way that sounds. Some kind of war happened out there that no one is really clear on. Anyways, our classes should last a few more weeks, then we head out. We're already starting to save up some money, from Marcus's tavern playing, Jason's sneakysneaky and I've found an interesting new business. 5 coppers and they get to look at my porn collection on the kindle. It's been hugely popular in the dorms. Did I just accidentally invent pornography?

Journal Entry 87 [ edit ]

This last week's been rough. Doing a full on mind attack in the middle of a fight without having to stop. I think I got it down but god damn. How to put it, having to split your full attention at two things at once. Hard core multitasking. Had to visit the healer a few times early on when I fucked up. Speaking of the healer, poked around to see if they knew about the radiation issue. They do know that people occasionally get cancer for no reason, and they can heal it. They believe it's either from the university's dark magics or a sinful lifestyle. When I told them it was all the granite, they thought I was crazy. I learned something else, something very important. It's possible to raise the dead. Resurrection. It's very expensive and doesn't always turn out right though. Should we? I don't know if we should bother bringing them back into this hell hole. They may be the lucky ones, sitting back and watching us from that elsewhere. This world does have a definitive afterlife. Possibly several, it's not clear. I don't know how to feel about this.

Journal Entry 88 [ edit ]

Well, there was a festival going on today, a big one. The central district was all done up, song, dance and specialized merchant goods. They're celebrating the season change. They apparently do this for every season, a last hurrah for the last one. Kind of a weird way to go about it, but a party is a party. So let's see, where to begin. Well, that many people having a blast is overwhelming and I nearly succumbed to it and found myself to be bored. So I let myself succumb to it and had the time of my life. Most if it's a blur and I blacked out at some point. Let's see, I danced and got drunk, then I think I got lucky with a smoking hot tiefling chick. At least I think she was hot, I was blitzed at the time. After that it's just broken flashes.. I think I challenged a dwarf to a drinking contest at some point. What the fuck was I thinking at the time. Something happened during nightfall, I think I was leading some locals on a quest to find a goblin townie to see how many beers it took to get him drunk. For Science. I guess. I woke up this morning in a detox room at one of the temples with most of my clothes missing. Luckily I left all my stuff back at the dorm. Got cleaned up, gave my hangover migraine to someone else and here I am. I have to find that damn magic necklace, I bet I got lead or mercury poisoning. I haven't put it on in awhile.

Journal Entry 89 [ edit ]

So the master artificer shows up today on a bicycle. Had the peddles on the front wheels like a Penny-Farthing but the wheels were even sized and leather padded. No traction at all, and breaking involved using your legs. Simple but it's a prototype. He was completely taken by the thing though. Took him a few days to figure out how to ride it, but he spent a good portion of today peddling around town and only crashed three times. Being the nice guy he was, and wanting more business, he decided to give me a bonus of a magic purse that duplicates any one.. and only one.. item put in it. Usable once a day. And the item must be small. He did warn me of some rules. No money duplicating, apparently it's illegal and they can find out somehow, and no duplicating magic items. It works on bullets, I tried it. It's a slow method of restocking but it does give me some peace of mind. I still have to be careful. So he's having his apprentices or students refine the bike, he's ready for something new. So I got together with Jason and we drew out some plans and introduced him to the Bessemer Converter. Neither of us knew the right chemical formula other than carbon was involved. I'm sure the master artificer can figure it out, they do make steel here, it's just a slow and tedious process. If he can get it to work, he seems to think we're all going to make a fortune.

Journal Entry 90 [ edit ]

Spent time in the archives doing research today. Had a few ideas of some new topics to look up that may have leads. Nothing. It got me thinking though, were we the only ones from Earth that ended up here? Just the ones that showed up in Rosenbridge? Why here, why there? Why us? If we were summoned here, what the hell are we supposed to do? What did that fucking voice want us here for? To kill some king in Winterfield? To run rampant across the countryside? To die one by one? What? Anyways, we have another week before we're done here and we move on. We have enough money saved up. Now I just need my psychic diploma and do the hat toss and I'm good. Been taking some frustration out by practicing sword fighting with Mike or Jason. Jason's slippery as fuck in mock combat. What the hell are they teaching him?

Journal Entry 91 [ edit ]

So some crackpot oracle in town, apparently well respected for some reason, runs out of his house in a panic and begins telling everyone he sees that doom is coming to the city unless “he” is stopped. So the guards panic and arrest the first known off-worlder they see. Me. So I'm sitting in a street cafe enjoying some hot tea while chatting up a pretty little half-elf chick about Hemingway when blam. Arrested. Arrested for suspicion to cause doom. Because of a crackpot oracle saw something in his chicken entrails or whatever he uses. Spent a few hours in the city dungeon. Damp, dirty, filled with assholes and rats. Luckily, prison sodomy is not a phenomena known to this place. It took a lot of effort to reach out to Marcus. He finally figured it out, thank god, and managed to talk them into releasing me. Could have I escaped on my own? Probably, but they know where I live. Somehow, we got slightly famous here, between Marcus's earth music, my kindle porn and the artificer riding around on his bicycle every day.

Journal Entry 92 [ edit ]

So we had our graduation today. No big spectacle, just a handshake. Most of the students have to move out now, we can still stay because the staff occasionally comes up with something new to experiment on us, and the master artificer likes to keep us close. With that in mind, we're paid up with an airship leaving in two days to begin our amazing Odyssey part two, The Revenge. So with this in mind, Marcus runs up to me today and informs me that one of the girls he's been with may be pregnant. An elf girl. And she's all ready to settle down so he can be a farmer for ever and ever and raise a big family. He's broadcasting anxiety across the building strong enough for every psion in the dorms to pick up on it and he's not in his right mind. I warned him about getting too comfortable in that bard lifestyle. So first thing he asks me, if I can “mind blast” it into miscarriage. No. Just no, that's too far, way too far over the edge. No. I probably could if I tried hard enough but NO. He's not allowed to ask the other students either or I'll erase his childhood or something. So we went over his less criminal options. Man up and become a farmer, Man up and tell her fuck that shit and dump her or Run and hide and meet us on the docks in two days and we'll leave all of this behind. So he's off in hiding until our trip out of here. I let Jason and Mike know. This is going to come back and bite us in the ass again, I know it will. Fucking bards.

Journal Entry 93 [ edit ]

So we're on the airship, the Celestial Rose. It's larger than the last one and not an obvious conversion of an ocean ship, but still styled after one. This one is also not sea worthy. Our quarters are better but not by much. At least we have a window this time. It's about 90ft from stem to stern, 20ft wide. I feel it's slower than the other one? Maybe because it's bigger. This one is leaving a magical green fire trail behind it as well. Marcus met us on the docks in disguise and we boarded. No issues leaving. While the people of Winterfield and Brightly thought Aeyllin was an isolationist city, it isn't. They do open trade, just not in that direction and it's mainly exports going out and the occasional adventurer coming in. So the captain of this boat is an adventurous..I think they call them Shifters? Beast person. Very educated. He clearly wants to be an adventurer but he's stuck in the family business. He's a glorified truck driver. On a motherfucking airship. Maybe if I were in his shoes I could empathize with him more. Or you know, mind rape. But I don't want to mess up the captain. The rest of the motley crew is a mix of dock workers and crate stackers, a wizard and their airship repair artificer. There are other passengers, a family of excitable halflings. I haven’t seen too many of them around, and they creep me out.

Journal Entry 94 [ edit ]

We're cruising along the coast, a few hundred feet up. Endless oceans in one direction, seaside plains in the other. The occasional beach goer or sailing ship. We did stop briefly, the captain wanted to fish. Pulled out a fishing rod and everything, and while everyone patiently waited, fished over the side, with the airship 50ft over the waves. He didn't catch anything after an hour and we resumed course. Whatever. Hung out on deck past nightfall. Can't see shit out there, not enough light. The pilot is apparently taking the ship up to a few hundred feet and hauling ass and navigating by dead-reckoning, then corrects his course come sunrise when he can see anything. There has to be a better way than this. Airship guide lights? Glowing, floating navigational buoys? Anyways, Marcus is still bleeding anxiety everywhere. I think he's finally realizing what he's been doing, and that yes, running away or not, he's going to be a father and it's not going to be entirely human. There may be others out there to boot, he's been grabbing ass since Wildlake. Ha, what if this is what we were brought here to do, scatter Earth human genes all across the population. Fuck, I've slept around too. Not nearly as much mind you.. God damnit.

Journal Entry 95 [ edit ]

Well, here we are. Ashvale. It's a port town, all wood structures with stone foundations and long docks heading off into the curved port. It's large enough to hold at least 6 ships. Currently 3 in dock. It has two airship docks, one of which is in use by the Rose. This town has no protective wall around it, no fence, no outer guard patrols. The guard are apparently just here to keep the drunk sailors from beating each other to a pulp. They don't even have a dungeon. No sewage system. They have a lante collection going around for a tannery just outside of town and everything else gets thrown where it's convenient. The smell is horrendous. We're getting out of here as fast as we can. There's a ship leaving in an hour for Kinild Beach, another port town two days ride away by sail and we booked passage. It's a low draft schooner that used to do longer range runs before the airships came around. It's named the Sea Serpent. Very original.

Journal Entry 96 [ edit ]

Well, the Sea Serpent is, of course, a different experience than airship travel. I have experience on the ocean, just not in a sailing ship. Mike has been seasick since he stepped foot on this tub. Badass warlock can't handle the motion of the ocean. We're not even sailing that far off shore. I could easily swim it if I had to. So something had been bothering me. The Sea Serpent was in fact a military vessel originally, then sold for patrols around Ashvale and now it's a cargo hauler. So how does ship to ship combat work? I asked around, a few ex navy dogs were amongst the crew. No cannons. They use a load of easy to work wands and have a few magic users to throw around some force. Then they get up close and have a swashbuckling sword fight. Elven navy, on the other hand, loads up with archers and likes to kite the enemy ship around while pelting it with arrows and magic. They apparently use smaller and faster ships working as packs to accomplish this but can't do deep sea combat as easy when the seas get rough. There are apparently deep ocean trained mages who can whip up a small storm to gain the advantage. A Dwarven or Orcish navy is kind of a joke around the sea salts. I wonder if anyone invented a submarine. They have the magics for it, someone just needs to implement them. It might not be safe though, there's apparently plenty of sea monsters down there and mermaids, sea elves and so on. No one can actually confirm if any of those exist mind you, just a friend of a friend saw one once after having a dwarven drinking contest or somesuch.

Journal Entry 97 [ edit ]

Dry land! Kinild Beach. This is a beach side town, half of it is in the ocean, built on stilts with hanging walkways between buildings. The chief occupation of this town is fish and shellfish. Lots of fishing nets, traps, poles, the works. There are no docks. Ships drop anchor and they send out big hovering magic disks to move cargo and people back and forth. Well, it certainly keeps unwanted people away from the ships. The ride was smooth. The material felt like glass almost. I'm pretty sure it's some kind of forcefield spell being put to good use. We're set up in the local inn and are resting for the night. Mike is doing much better and Marcus got baby troubles off his mind. Between the airship and the ride here, I got a suntan. The trip here has been pretty easy so far. So the locals are tan skinned with an odd accent, human. It's funny that listing race is now a common thing. I think I've gotten used to all of this. How long have I been here again? Anyways, the locals. Superstitious but otherwise friendly. The whole place is run by coven of sea witches who make keep the local giant kraken at bay. I didn't see any sign of any giant kraken but I'll take their word for it. They're also strict prohibitionist. Kinild is in fact a dry town. No alcohol allowed. They have a big list of reasons why. Instead, the taverns sell apple cider, Orange juice, tea and rare coffee from the far off lands. It's been forever since I've had coffee. It's pretty good too, hazelnut blend.

Journal Entry 98 [ edit ]

Well, we're on the run. Turned out those assholes on the Sea Serpent stole most of our money at some point. By the time we found out, they were all on their ship and the locals weren't going to send a disk over to deal with it. Wasn't their problem as far as they were concerned. I got to the furthest out building and still couldn't reach them. But Mike could. So while they're taunting us from deck and me, Marcus and Jason are screaming back insults, Mike just up and sets their ship aflame with his black fire. It ignited beautifully. So the Sea Serpent is sinking in flames off the coast and of course this is attracting attention. We manage to make it to the inn and hide out while the Sea Witches men search for us. They aren't too happy that we clogged their beach with a sunken flaming wreck. I don't care, those asshole sailors had it coming and I'm sure none of them died, the shore was right there. So we make a quick plan to get out of town. We still need money so we hold up the innkeeper. He doesn't know what a pistol is so just tased him before he could reveal himself to be a retired adventurer and we took everything in the money box. It wasn't much. 20 silvers and a handful of coppers. Not enough to get us anywhere. So I mind wiped the incident out of the innkeeper's head and we get the hell out of town while the guards are elsewhere. So yeah, we're horrible people and I don't care because it was the best thrill I've had in awhile. None of us are even mad at Mike for starting the whole thing either. So we ran full tilt down the trade road. I'm not sure how long it will take to get to Wolflake by foot, probably a week.

Journal Entry 99 [ edit ]

Two days on the path and we get jumped by a band of 20 or so Orcs. Right where the map said “Beware, Orcs.” Right where those assholes said I could ignore it. Pacified. They weren't bandits, but they were a war party. I started having Winterfield Barbarian flashbacks but their minds weren't entirely hostile, more worried. We got interrogated at sword and spear point. They're out here keeping reinforcements from getting to Wolflake. Apparently war between the “Pacified” Orc tribes of the region and the kingdom of Wolflake is about to kick off. Again. We ensured that that we were not reinforcements and had no idea what the hell was going on out here, and that we were just passing through. Left out the whole off-worlder/king-slayer/ship-burning parts. They were being mostly truthful, and so were we. So the reason for the war? The Orcs didn't like being pacified. They are a brutal warrior culture with their own honor system, and while they weren't committing acts of banditry and rape, the local Kingdom decided they wanted those lands and that the tribes could suck it. Thus the war. Wolflake won and started a campaign of “Pacification” on the survivors to “Cull the herd” of that silly tribal violence. It may have worked, but instead produced a more tactical minded breed rather than turning them into willing subjects. So we were handed an ultimatum, and it took some mental manipulation between myself and Marcus to pull it off. So mercenaries working for them, or slaves. It's still not what we were aiming for, to just be set free, but it's better than the alternative. So we're being gang-pressed into to the grand army of the united Orc tribes as mercenaries. We get paid too. If we survive. Better than slaves or dead.

Journal Entry 100 [ edit ]

So, we'v