THE FOUNTAIN HOPPER

proudly presents



CLARITY First Edition So you clicked The Button.

Good move.

Below is The Fountain Hopper's tried and tested Five Step Plan ™ for getting hold of your admissions records, including qualitative and quantitative reviews by your admissions readers.



Requesting your admissions documents is a simple 5 step process that takes less than 5 minutes. You probably want to be on a real computer to do this (so star the email and come back to it later?).

Are you excited? We're excited.

Let's do this.



STEP 1:

Click here to get to Stanford's HelpSU ticket filing system.



(if for some reason the link doesn't work, visit helpsu.stanford.edu, Request Category: Central Office Issues, Request Type: Registrar) (if for some reason the link doesn't work, visit helpsu.stanford.edu, Request Category: Central Office Issues, Request Type: Registrar)

STEP 2:



Fill in the form using FoHo's template requests



(Or you can click "auto-fill via WebAuth" to make things a bit faster)

If you don't AutoFill, your 'Department' is either your major or 'Unknown'.





For Request Description, you have two options: the "nice" option



or

the "serious business" option

(a tip of the hat to our lovely FoHo contributors at Stanford Law School who helped us put it together) The Nice Option Hello! This is a FERPA access request. I am requesting access to all documents held by the Stanford University Office of Undergraduate Admission, including without limitation a complete copy of any admissions records kept in my name in any and all university offices, including the Undergraduate Admission Workcard and all associated content (including without limitation the qualitative and quantitative assessments of any 'readers,' demographics data, interview records) ; any e-mails, notes, memoranda, video, audio, or other documentary material maintained by the Office of Undergraduate Admissions. I look forward to receiving access to these documents within 45 calendar days.



The Less Nice Option

(a.k.a. the why did you bill me $300 for a wall scratch / why can't I use meal plan dollars where they count / why must I wait two weeks for a CAPS appointment when I need one now / why are intro chem classes designed to make you cry / *insert grievance here* option: Pursuant to the Family Educational Rights and Privacy Act (20 U.S.C. Sec. 1232g), I write to request access to and a copy of all documents held by the Stanford University Office of Undergraduate Admission, including without limitation a complete copy of any admissions records kept in my name in any and all university offices, including the Undergraduate Admission Workcard and all associated content (including without limitation the qualitative and quantitative assessments of any 'readers', demographics data, interview records) ; any e-mails, notes, memoranda, video, audio, or other documentary material maintained by the Office of Undergraduate Admissions.



FERPA prohibits the imposition of a fee to review documents (per 34 CFR Sec. 99.11(b)).



If you choose to redact any portion of any documents responsive to this request, please provide a written explanation for the redaction including a reference to the specific statutory exemption(s) upon which you rely. Also, please provide all segregable portions of otherwise exempt material. I understand that I may have previously waived FERPA rights pertaining to recommendations provided through the Common Application. Be advised that, if selected, this waiver pertains solely to recommendations provided through the Common Application system.



As per 34 CFR Sec. 99.10(b), these records must be made available for my inspection within 45 days of this request.



I look forward to receiving a full response within 45 calendar days. If you feel like really hammering the point home and/or if your last final is scheduled for Friday afternoon and you can't find it in your heart to ever forgive and forget, you can also include the next paragraph: Please be advised that a failure to provide access to these records within the statutory time limit will result in a complaint to the Office of Postsecondary Education. The penalty for an intentional failure to comply with FERPA's terms is the loss of all federal education funds, as per 20 U.S.C. Sec. 1232g(a)(2).

STEP 3:



Click "Submit Help Request".

STEP 4



Click here, but only after you complete steps 1 through 3!

This part is super important.



(Did we mention it's important?

Because it's important). This part is super important.(Did we mention it's important?Because it's important).

STEP 5:



Twiddle your thumbs for up to 45 days (March 1st, as of press time). Bask in the warm fuzzy glow of #winning [youtube].



BUT:







When people start getting stuff back, we'll push a full demystification of the numbers and jargon in the documents (which is why it's really important you tell us if you've received your dox!) Please let us know at tips@fountainhopper.com when you get your records or if you hear anything back. (Including FERPA in the subject line will make things a little easier for us).When people start getting stuff back, we'll push a full demystification of the numbers and jargon in the documents (which is why it's really important you tell us if you've received your dox!) You have questions? We have answers.

FAQ:



Q: Why are you asking me to click a button to get the instructions?

A: Because we want to send instructions only to people that actually want them.



Q: How did you find this?

A: We're just really fucking amazing. Embrace it.



Q: What is FERPA?

A: Read up on it



Q: Won't they just ignore me?

A: Maybe, but unlikely. If they do, they could get all their federal funding yanked.



Q: I'm an alum/admit/reject (sorry). Can I do this too?

A: Maybe. We're not 100% sure how long Admissions holds onto the files of non-matriculated students, but it's worth a shot.



Q: How do you know this will work?

A: Excellent question. We've been working on this for months and we're reasonably confident we've got everything spot on. We have multiple admissions files in hand already from some of our contributors, thereby proving that they hold onto them till you graduate. We've also chatted with college admissions professionals, lawyers and journalists specializing in access to public information and the consensus is that Stanford is legally obligated to play ball.



Q: Why did you not answer my excellent question?

A: Probably because it's yet to be "frequently asked." Send it along to A: Because we want to send instructions only to people that actually want them.A: We're just really fucking amazing. Embrace it.A: Read up on it here here , and here A: Maybe, but unlikely. If they do, they could get all their federal funding yanked.(sorry)A: Maybe. We're not 100% sure how long Admissions holds onto the files of non-matriculated students, but it's worth a shot.A: Excellent question. We've been working on this for months and we're reasonably confident we've got everything spot on. We have multiple admissions files in hand already from some of our contributors, thereby proving that they hold onto them till you graduate. We've also chatted with college admissions professionals, lawyers and journalists specializing in access to public information and the consensus is that Stanford is legally obligated to play ball.A: Probably because it's yet to be "frequently asked." Send it along to tips@fountainhopper.com and we'll give it our best shot.

Q: OMG this is amazing. Is there more?

A: We're just getting started ;)