Renegade: Chris Gayle uploaded a photo to Instagram making light of his $10,000 fine. Credit:Instagram/Chris Gayle

And your newspaper columns, too. They don't make no sense. All that in-joke gibber between you and KP, all that fun about you being the best batsmen in the world, cha, me didn't take no bombocloth offence to that neither. But see, I'm different from your average Australian. Me understand cultural differences. Unlike dem Australians wit their BS about PC, me know where you comin' from, brethren. Me know you got a good lovin' heart like all we Jamaican brethren. And Mel whatshername, she'll come around, just you wait. Any woman be flattered to be asked out for a drink by you, boss. Just wait till she understand cultural differences. I'd go weak at the knees if you noticed my sparkly eyes, Chris. Some would call them penetrating.

So all is forgiven from this suburb. No offence taken. People ought to chill. Laugh it off and move on. You'd think the holy armageddon had take place for how people over-react. You got a lot of supporters in this country, boss. We understand you come from a different culture, any Jamaican woman love being chatted up by a big man like you or me. Is different deh.

You da man, brethren. You people have such lovely big smiles, the way your teeth and your own sparkly eyes shine out in the night-time, you're a beautiful man. 'Welcome to Jamaica, have a nice day', heh heh heh.

And the way you hit the ball! It's incredible how you big guys swing so hard, you're such amazing athletes. I've loved West Indian athletes ever since Joel Garner – 'If I was built in proportion, I wouldn't be six foot eight, I'd be eight foot six!' You heard that one? Amazing physical specimens, all of you. I'd pay any money to watch you on the field, like I'd watch Mike Tyson, Ben Johnson, OJ Simpson – whatever else the PC brigade will say about you people, you are the most breathtaking athletes. So don't get down if people say you uneducated. That's not why you de Universe Boss, brethren. It's your amazing physical prowess. And don't the ladies love it! And they call us racist in this country, when we love you guys.