IF YOU want to buy a bottle of Frosty Jack’s cider in Scotland you can now only pay for it using Bitcoin, it has been confirmed.

A Scottish government spokesman said: “We’ve never used Bitcoin but it sounds really complicated, so it’s a great way to deter problem drinkers. You’re not going to download a special browser or whatever just to get leathered.

“Actually you might do, it depends how determined you are I suppose.”

Sparkling cider fan Roy Hobbs said: “My life went to shit a few years back after my wife left and I lost my job and then I started drinking myself into oblivion.

“And now to top it off I’ve got to figure out how to use peer-to-peer transactions that are verified through network nodes and cryptography.

“If the bloke who came up with that hadn’t been drinking Frosty Jack’s then I’d be very surprised.”