Continue Reading Below Advertisement

Now, I know what you're saying: "But Gladstone, your column is called 'Throwing Stones,' your video series is called 'Hate By Numbers,' and we've read your stuff -- you like to spew fire. Basically, you're an asshole." Or maybe you're saying none of that because you've only read the title and the numbered entries and right now you're just feeling confused and unfulfilled, like your sexual partners. But the point is, yeah, I do have a fire in my belly, and it is my parents' fault, mostly because they were good parents.



I'll get you for this!

Continue Reading Below Advertisement

I'm not sure if this makes sense, but something about growing up in a loving home with relatively fair parents ... breaks you. It gets you used to the idea of authority being tethered to reason. It gives you an expectation of communication following commands. And it gives you absolutely no tolerance for the failure of the rest of the world to extend the same courtesy.

It doesn't matter who it is: the government, your boss, your friends and lovers. It's anyone or anything that tells you what to do solely because they can, and it doesn't matter if it makes sense or not. It's not about right or wrong, rational or otherwise -- it's about doing as you're told. So yeah, I'm broken in that way, too, because sometimes I just ... don't. I'm not saying that makes me cool (although if you want to swoon now, feel free); I'm saying that's one of the things that's broken me. I've got at least two on this list. How'd you do?

Broken people are big fans of HATE BY NUMBERS. They also follow Gladstone on Twitter and stay up-to-date on the latest regarding Notes from the Internet Apocalypse. And then there's his website and Tumblr, too.