“Bingo Bongo.”



On Saturday, January 22, 2011, a character from the webcomic Homestuck was suddenly killed. On Sunday, the scene continued, and in a string of wordless panels, another beloved character prepared to take revenge for this murder. On Monday, this character was also killed, and the murderer escaped. (I didn’t remember those dates on the top of my head, Homestuck has a very well-maintained archive, but I do at least remember that it was my first weekend back at William and Mary after my junior year’s winter break.)



To this day, that one-two punch remains my go-to example of a nameless phenomenon in serialized storytelling that fascinates me to no end: when reading Homestuck in real time, these deaths are two discrete events that happened days apart, but when reading it literally any time the after full string of updates concluded, both deaths are one big event. The gap between published segments of a serial have a tremendous effect on how the audience takes in a story, but once the story is complete, that effect can’t be felt again by new audiences.



Lars of the Stars aired just over seven months after Lars’s Head, and as someone who watched Steven Universe live since the pilot first dropped, it felt like the momentous return of the Off Colors. An ultra-early preview of the episode piled on the hype for the fanbase (I personally avoided discussion of it, not wanting to spoil myself), and the Breakup Arc made the divide seem even greater. But if you’re watching all the episodes in a row, the gap between Lars’s last appearance and this one is just 66 minutes; for context, that’s shorter than the time between Spinel landing on Earth and leaving it with the Diamonds.

I see Lars of the Stars as a very different episode today than I did when it debuted, and that’s fully because of the release schedule. Because while it remains a fresh, fun new direction after dwelling on the Breakup Arc for a few months and waiting on Lars to come back for even longer, watching it without the hiatus makes it clear that this isn’t just the start of a new chapter. It’s also an epilogue.

The fourteen episodes between Doug Out and Kevin Party pile on so much tension that we need a follow-up that feels like a break, which Lars of the Stars is happy to provide. But that doesn’t mean we can’t celebrate how far our characters have come during that chunk of episodes, and that’s exactly what happens here. Part 1 of the big stretch ends with Steven leaving everyone behind as he goes to space, and now we get an episode about him returning to space but including Connie in the way he should have from the start. Part 2 of the big stretch ends with the Off Colors trapped on Homeworld with little hope in sight, and now we get an episode about their freewheeling lives among the stars. And Part 3 of the big stretch ends with Steven and Connie establishing a new understanding of their relationship, and now we get an episode where they share what they’ve learned with the class.

In our last episode, Connie showed an ability to socialize without Steven. While this makes him worry that she might only be at Kevin’s titular party to have a good time rather than reconnect, the furthest he goes in terms of dark thoughts is that she doesn’t wanna hang out with him anymore. Meanwhile, Lars takes Sadie’s similar ability so socialize without him as a personal insult: his instinct is to assume she’s hanging out with the Cool Kids as an act of revenge, because it turns out people don’t just flip personalities after major life events, and despite some tremendous changes Lars still has work to do. (This is something that happens more and more as the show goes on, it’s almost as if the perpetual need to work on yourself is a major theme of the latter-day series or something.)



Stevonnie’s ability to help Lars out works in any episode, because Stevonnie embodies close relationships and Lars could use some tips on that front. But the fact that their defense of Sadie in this situation is what causes Steven and Connie to fuse in the first place gains new power when this it comes right after watching Kevin Party, because feeling uncertain about a friend/love interest’s new friends is something they just experienced both sides of. And as one last reflection of the kids as individuals, Steven reacts to Lars’s concerns with a thoughtful monologue about his feelings, but only after Connie chews him out for being such a dingus.



It’s lousy to be possessive and self-absorbed, but for all my criticism of Lars in the past, it’s not as if he’s the only teenager to be possessive or self-absorbed in the world (or space). That doesn’t make the behavior great, but it’s more a sign of adolescent insecurity than any deeper failing at this stage of his life; if he doesn’t grow out of it then that’s a whole other story, but his negative impulses are outweighed by his ability to take criticism of those impulses and reexamine his outlook. And as part of a show that teaches big lessons to kids, I love that his poor reaction to Sadie’s happiness is presented not as some angsty relationship hurdle, but as comically pathetic. Matthew Moy has a blast playing a version of the character who’s finally confident, but he hasn’t forgotten how to tap into Lars’s whiny grouch.



Thankfully that confidence defines the rest of the episode (which itself lends power to the stark return to his old personality). I don’t just say “thankfully” because I’m glad he’s got some self-esteem, but because like I just said, Matthew Moy has a blast. This is the goofiest episode we’ve had since The New Crystal Gems, and while I’m sure it’s even better for anime fans out there (Space Pirate Captain Harlock being the clearest influence) it still works for scrubs like me without that reference pool. Which is critical, as I doubt many members of the youth audience are all caught up on their late seventies anime.



Excellent pacing helps the fun hit for maximum impact, pivoting us from Kevin Party to space with a brisk opening scene and reintroducing characters not through exposition (which takes time) but on-screen text (which is faster and also magnificently cheesy; Lamar Abrams practiced this in Restaurant Wars). We use space jargon and references to old adventures to throw us in the middle of Lars’s journey in a quick and believable way, all the while building up the camaraderie between the Off Colors. His miniature breakdown would normally be a third act affair, allowing for its resolution to conclude the story, but instead it’s smack in the middle of the episode and we get a bunch more fun after it: it’s an important part of the story that informs Lars’s final gambit, but it’s not the main set piece.

(And, of course, the music remains as on point as ever: Aivi and Surasshu give the Sun Incinerator a punchy theme that complements those introductions perfectly, and revisit the motif heard in the Love Like You reprise, Holly Blue Agate’s scenes, and the drone attacks from Off Colors during this new foray into space. I don’t think it’s even possible for these two to disappoint.)



Confident Lars is marvel to behold, because it’s the real deal. His insecurities are still there, but rather than patching them up with a superiority complex (which so often is the case when insecure folks go too hard in building themselves up) he doesn’t feel the need to put on a front anymore. He’s cocky, but he loves his crew for who they are and is never as mean to them as he was to Steven, even as a joke. His exaggerated anime poses aren’t just dopey and delightful for the sake of being dopey and delightful, but show a newfound ability to have fun without being crippled by self-consciousness. And his zany schemes, shouted about by Emerald at first but then seen in action, actually work! He comes into his own as a space pirate, and as neat as it is to see him become a baker when he returns to Earth, Lars of the Stars makes a strong case for a life in space.

Speaking of Emerald, while I’m sure a lot of folks who hyped themselves up on Lars of the Stars were disappointed that this is all we see of her (especially because emeralds are big-name gemstones in the real world), I think her single appearance makes the episode even more of a hoot. This is not Steven’s story, so we get very little frame of reference for what the Off Colors have been up to: it feels like a crossover episode with a nonexistent spinoff. Having a small glimpse into the greater journey was a great call, because this is just one of many tales from the Sun Incinerator’s sterling crew, and it keeps up the thread of Steven being out of the loop on Lars and Sadie’s lives.



It also lets Jinkx Monsoon ham it up even harder than Moy without getting bogged down by character complexity. This is a ridiculous space adventure, and that tone is heightened by a baddie who doesn’t chew so much as gorge herself on the scenery. I mean, this is still Steven Universe, so even someone as over the top as Emerald gets a tiny arc: Lars seems to be the instigator of their rivalry, and while we side with the Off Colors because they’re the underdogs escaping persecution, Emerald has legitimate reasons to see herself as the wronged party. And Lars’s realization that she would never fire on her own ship doesn’t just work as a conclusion to his story, showing that he learned a lesson from his bitterness towards Sadie, but for Emerald’s, showing that while she wants her revenge she more just wants her stuff back. But this is still an opponent who we only see screaming from a screen, and that’s exactly what this episode needs.

The Off Color Gems stick to the characterization that defined them in their debut, but they’ve all let their guard down in a way that suggests both familiarity with Lars and relief from the unending pressure of a lifetime of hiding on Homeworld. We get a few good jokes from their roles on the ship, but their competence is never undermined. It’s funny that Padparadscha is a technical advisor, considering she only offers insight on events that already happened, but she ends up being able to foresee Emerald’s intent as well, which certainly has its uses. It’s funny that Fluorite is the chief engineer, considering her meandering nature doesn’t mesh with the tight time windows of keeping a speedy starship afloat, but despite her slowness she manages to keep pace. It’s funny that Rhodonite is head of strategic operations, considering her usual strategy is to panic at the most minor setback, but her constant worry about what could go wrong helps balance out Lars’s recklessness. While while the Rutile Twins’ natures aren’t at odds with their role as pilot, they’ve grown out of their quirk more than anyone else on the team: the sisters have branched out from their repetitive dialogue, with each head now expressing separate thoughts on a regular basis. They don’t just summarize each other anymore. They aren’t redundant anymore either.



Steven and Connie are largely around to observe and comment, even after fusing into Stevonnie, until they take over for the final action sequence. And that’s just fine, because it turns out AJ Michalka nails supporting role as well as nails lead: Stevonnie’s blithe “Whuzzat” is the perfect punchline to the Off Colors’ fear of the melodramatic “that,” but nothing tops the sincere adulation of “Wow Lars I missed you.” And because they don’t steal Lars’s spotlight in his big moment, it’s that much more exciting when they take the Star Skipper out for a drive, ending the episode with a brilliant action scene and a cliffhanger that promises further adventure, like any good space serial should. Steven Universe has the occasional incomplete first half of a two-parter, one that works fine in context but not as well on its own. Lars of the Stars does not have this problem, working so well as a genre piece that the lack of a conclusion is the only viable conclusion.



Finally, Lars of the Stars doesn’t just celebrate the end of Act III’s fourteen-episode sweep: this is the last episode from Jesse Zuke, who came out swinging with Chille Tid and maintained an unbelievable batting average over the course of their twenty episodes. There’s only one episode Zuke had a hand in that I’m not huge on, Know Your Fusion, and even that is funny as hell if you’re into that style of meta humor. Alongside Hilary Florido, Zuke gave us two of the show’s greatest instances of characters just hanging out in Beta and Last Stop Out of Beach CIty, and the pair laid and reinforced the foundation for Peridot’s post-villain characterization in Catch and Release, Too Far, Log Date 7 15 2, Barn Mates, Too Short to Ride, the aforementioned Beta, Gem Harvest, and Room for Ruby. But on top of being a master of comedy, Zuke could also do horror (Chille Tid and Are You My Dad) and drama (Beach City Drift, Steven vs. Amethyst, Gemcation), and had a good enough understanding of Steven and Lars to earn solo boarding credit on Stuck Together. I would’ve loved to see what else Zuke might’ve brought to Steven Universe, but that makes their unbelievable consistency that much more of a gift while it lasted. Bingo Bongo, Jesse.



Future Vision!

This is the first time we hear Sadie Killer and the Suspects by name, and it thankfully won’t be the last.



We’re the one, we’re the ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR!

It speaks to the range of Steven Universe that teen drama Kevin Party can stand alongside Lars of the Stars in my list of favorites. Granted, my top five also speaks to this range, but it’s nuts that the last two episodes are back-to-back and it not only works but benefits from this viewing order despite their wildly different tones.



Top Twenty-Five

Love ‘em



Like ‘em

Enh

No Thanks!

6. Horror Club

5. Fusion Cuisine

4. House Guest

3. Onion Gang

2. Sadie’s Song

1. Island Adventure