Tom Coburn, bag-man extraordinaire, is having a bit of a tough time. Sure, there’s all the questions about the John Ensign affair, which make Coburn out to look not only like the worst Christian ever but also a little bit like a potential perjurer. But that’s not the big issue facing our nation, people! What’s that you say? You’re pretty sure the American public is worried about jobs? Well, what the hell do you know about anything? Haven’t you heard that the most pressing issue of our times is the debt? Jobs, psh…

So, what to do? Everybody’s got a plan. Some are not popular, some are slightly more popular and some are curiously non-existent in the conversation. So, while everyone is arguing about whose budget is more serious, the Senate comes in to the rescue! The Gang of Six are here to offer a bipartisan solution that everyone hates (I wonder if it ever occurred to politicos that the word ‘gang’ is king of a turn-off) and they’ve been working very hard on that last point.

But we’re going to have to wait, boys and girls. Because while Tom Coburn understands that sometimes you have to negotiate with millions of dollars in real estate to keep untidy indiscretions quiet, there is no way he is going to accept anything less than gutting Social Security and Medicare to solve our nation’s ills. From TPM:

A source with knowledge of the negotiations says Coburn ultimately broke ranks after members of the group rejected his proposal to introduce a global cap on Medicare spending that would have cut $150 billion from current beneficiaries. “The issue we have now is, over the last couple weeks Coburn has been slow walking this and it’s become clear that he’s not been negotiating in good faith,” the source said. “He came yesterday with demands that we make immmedate and deep cuts to current Medicare beneficiaries.”

I mean, if we’re not willing to throw old people in the street, we’re simply not serious enough to deal with the debt. And so Coburn picked up his bible (?) and went home. Reportedly, there is no more Gang of Six, I suppose because everyone besides Dick Durbin wanted to cut even more.

So remember, folks. Tom Coburn is willing to haggle with criminals to cover up an affair and lie about it, but if he doesn’t get his way when we’re talking about the country, he sticks his fingers in his ears and screams. It’s so serious I could puke.