World. People everywhere, are celebrating as news pours in from around the world of possible world peace. President Obama confirmed that he’ll be withdrawing the troops from Afghanistan and bringing them home just in time for the beginning of Season 3 of a Game of Thrones. He said, “This is not the time for war; this is the time for watching fictional wars between delusional people who all think they have a claim to the throne.”



Elsewhere, protesters in Egypt, who have been opposed to President Mohamed Morsi’s rule, have agreed to stop protesting saying, “There is no time to protest, I don’t want to miss a single episode, but protests will continue as soon as season 3 ends.”



Surprisingly, even North Korea has agreed to stop building nuclear weapons. Jon Un of the House Kim, the First of his Name, King of the Mongols and the Khitan, Lord of the Seven Nuclear Missiles and Protector of North Korea had this to say, “I see a lot of myself in the boy king, Joffrey Baratheon, he would do well as Supreme Leader of North Korea.



When asked to comment on the sudden call for world peace, the author of the acclaimed series, George R. R. Martin had this to say, “This is the main reason I wrote the books. I create wars in a fake world to keep you entertained thus preventing you from starting wars in the real world.”



In other news, incest is on the rise. Researchers are unsure how this is related to the Game of Thrones TV series but said, “We have noticed an increase in cases of incest around the same time the show started, but it’s still unclear if it’s related, it could just be a coincidence.”



We’ll be bringing you more on the war of the seven kingdoms, the death of your favorite characters and the end of this fictional world as we know it.



– The Daily Informant.