Today was a pretty slow day. It started off with my son becoming Emperor of Rome, my nearly going to war with Scotland over a duchy in Wales, and my death. Perhaps I should explain.

Around 34 years ago, back when the original Murchad was Petty King of Munster, I married my grandson into the family of the Holy Roman Emperor. About 5 generations down, and the third child. His chances of ever inheriting anything were slim to none, but she had really good traits so I wanted her in my court.

Somewhere along the way, her line of the family gained the throne. I’m not going to say she had her brothers murdered, because I have no proof. But both died in “suspicious accidents”, within a month of each other. If it was her, she’s efficient, at least.

Meanwhile, Brian had discovered why King Duncan wasn’t replying to his requests. He’d died 20 years ago. Unfortunately, his successor, Agnes, had no intention of relinquishing Ulster.

—



“What do you mean she said no?!”

“Sire, she claims that Ulster is a Scottish territory, and as suc

h Ireland has no claim to it.”

“No claim? It’s attached to our bloody country, how is it their territory?! I intend to take back Ulster, and if the Scots want to stop me they can swim over and tell me the claims in person.”

Brian sat on his throne, fuming. If Duncan had still been around he would have been understanding. Perhaps he should teach this Agnes why Ireland bowed to him…

—

I’m not sure quite how I managed to not notice his death for 20 years, but still, I know now. Either way, I decided that Agnes needed to be taught that you don’t say no to Brian Ua Briain.

I was considering fabricating a claim on some welsh territories to get another angle to attack Scotland from, when suddenly, my Chancellor, Firstborn Son, and Heir, left my court. I was kind of shocked.

I read the message, “Murchad Ua Briain has left your court for the Holy Roman Empire.” What? Why? And then the popup appeared in the top right:

“Emoke has become Empress of the Holy Roman Empire”.

That name sounded familiar, so I checked the character portrait. Oh, okay, it’s my son’s wife. Apparently my son’s left to go become Emperor of the Roman Empire. So I check who’s bloodline the heir is. He’s mine.

I just inherited the entire Holy Roman Empire… I have no problems with this.

I guess one-upping your dad is a family tradition. Murchad is just starting to settle in and get comfy when he receives an urgent message, calling him back to Ireland. He departs almost immediately.

—

Lying in his bed, Brian stirred as Murchad entered the room. “You returned! I had concerns you would not answer my summons.”

“My family is more important than politics. The empire can wait a few days.”

“It may have to wait longer. I’m dying, Murchad. And I need you to take up the throne. Your brothers are too young, the people will not accept them.”

Kneeling down by his father’s side Murchad smiled. “Of course father. Ireland must have a ruler who knows how to rule. Emoke can handle things in Rome by herself for a while.”

—

And so passed Brian Ua Briain, son of Petty King Murchad I, King of Ireland, and father to the Emperor of Rome.

It turned out quite quickly that perhaps Emoke couldn’t handle things in Rome without some help. Several of the small counties rebelled. She was able to put down all but Vienna, which for some reason kept rallying other counties to come defend it.

No matter, Emoke called for Murchad’s assistance, and it was provided. I sent all my levies to assist her, and between us Vienna was crushed. As I returned my armies home I realised that perhaps sending all my levies was not such a good idea. The duke of Ulster (or at least, three-quarters of it) rebelled, and I had to crush his armies six times before he surrendered. Shockingly, the rebel leader wasn’t called Domnhall, for once.

Apparently the war in the Roman Empire affected Murchad.

Maybe, his father’s outlook hadn’t been so wrong. Maybe a little war was good to unwind.

But Murchad was a tactician, even when he went to war, it was planned down to the last detail.

Somehow, he coerced the heir to the throne of England to marry his second son to Murchad’s daughter, matri-linearly. Then he had Godwine’s, the current King, assassinated.

Sadly, the Assassin was captured on his way out, and Murchad’s involvement was revealed. But now he had a valid claim. Raising his armies, he marched straight past all the outlying counties, to Essex, where the new King, Wulfric, ruled England from.

Once the garrison had fallen, Wulfric was dragged out of the fortress and told to swear Fealty. I can only assume his refusal was a medieval equivalent of “You wot mate?”

So Murchad went to Winchester, to grab a couple pints and wait for everything to blow over.

By which I mean he ransacked the place. At some point in the siege I noticed the call allies button had appeared and thought “Eh, why not.” I sent summons to Rome, Hungary and Denmark.

All 3 responded “Yes”.

Suddenly, England found itself vastly outnumbered. Wulfric surrendered, and Murchad put his Granddaughter on the throne. She was never going to inherit anything so it seemed fair to give her something to rule. Even if it was Essex.

And then Murchad just left, returning to Ireland. His allies also returned home, having fulfilled their offer of assistance. Murchad sat back on his throne and smiled as the English dukes and counts squabbled over territories.

With all the fighting going on, there was no way Scotland would be able to interfere with his attempts to take Wales now. Any troops he sent out would just get caught in the fighting between England and Mercia.

Everything was going according to the plan.

P.S – I realised I forgot to mention the war for Wales. You see that little green patch at the bottom of Wales? Apparently that warranted Scotland sending 13,000 troops down to try and stop me. Thankfully, I got surrender terms before they could arrive.