Reading a book on the tube is great, sure. But being the important-women-trying-to-have-it-all that we are, we’re in search of something a little more productive.

We’re multi-taskers, you know? We want our commute to tick off multiple things on our to-do lists.

Which is why we are obviously OVERJOYED by the creation of the dildo hoverboard. It’s a hoverboard (not one that actually hovers, just one of those annoying things on wheels) with a thrusting dildo attached.


So you can masturbate, get to work, AND take in your surroundings. So many accomplishments, and all before 9am. It’s the dream. The dildo dream.



The Dildo Hoverboard is, of course, the creation of Dildo Everything, the same people behind the dildo drone and the dildo selfie stick.

Again, it’s not actually available for purchase. And for that we are deeply sorry.

Its website simply lists the dildo hoverboard as available for pre-order, but doesn’t actually have a link to let you register your interest.

Sad times.

But at least now we know that the dildo hoverboard is possible. At least now we know that people are still capable of creative genius.

Let us imagine a world where we all have the dildo hoverboards we dream of. Let us imagine a better world.

Just watch out for potholes.

MORE: Masturbation Month: Everything you need to know about buying your first vibrator

MORE: Finally, there’s a device that lets you lick your cat without getting hair on your tongue

MORE: Masturbation Month: How to have better orgasms

Advertisement Advertisement