Here we are, in the slightly hazy waning days of the year right before this one ends and the next one begins. And, as every year, this is the time when we look at ourselves and decide what needs to be improved upon; will we resolve to balance our budgets? Drink more water? Exercise regularly? Quit Smoking?

Will we see it through?

Well, probably not.

According to a 2012 Forbes article based on a study by the University of Scranton, only 8% of people achieve New Year's Resolutions of the 40% who make them. The idea of self-improvement is a compelling one for most people.

But c'mon, we have lives.

It's easy to say we're going to lose 30 pounds, or cut weekend drinking in half, start home cooking rather than eating out. Most NY resolutions are noble goals. But again, we have lives. Finding the time and motivation around jobs, and school, and kids, and friends, and life is... well, it's hard.

Last year, I made three very vague resolutions - the mantra I've repeated to myself as I've dived face-first into situations I'd never been brave enough to experience in the past; positive experiences, new adventures, financial independence.

Three vaguely-stated goals that allowed me to navigate the waters of 2018 and captain the choices I made.

It worked out well. I made friends, travelled beyond the borders of my own town, and fell in love. I pursued jobs I hadn't believed I was good enough for and I actually landed a job that granted me a larger measure of financial freedom than I've ever had. I also stopped eating meat, which is the single hard goal I set out for myself.

Hard goals are great. If you're one of the lucky 8% with the time and dedication to put down a list of definitive things and see them through, you're a better human than I.

But if you, like me, have spent every year watching your hopes for the new year slips through the cracks between your obligations, here is the advice of a consummate procrastinator and life-long couch potato; Pick one. Find one thing that matters to you, one thing that the upheaval of which will benefit your life, and then do that thing. For the rest, keep it fluid.

Resolutions are about what we want. I didn't want a specific kind of job, only one that would make me happy. I didn't have a specific destination, only the desire to see new places. I didn't have a prince charming in mind ( yes I did, it was Andrew Hozier) when I met the guy I'll soon be moving in with.

For most people, New Year's Resolutions are a lie we tell ourselves about the future. That we'll wake up on January 1st as a version of yourself with more drive, better time-management, and probably much glossier hair and subtle makeup because life is a movie. Truth is, you're gonna wake up as you. You meet the person you want to be along the way. So, don't give up. be introspective and honest, and let what made you unhappy this year be the bedrock on how you build a better you in 2019.

You've got this.