Developer Really Hoping You Forgot About Those Kickstarter Rewards

LEBANON, Ky. — The development team behind the upcoming indie game ALBATROSS, which received a huge influx of cash from a successful Kickstarter campaign more than six years ago, is reportedly hoping that users have forgotten about their promised pledge rewards.

The campaign for ALBATROSS, a metroidvania-inspired roguelike golf game with RPG elements and a retro art style, drew 50,000 backers and raised over $2 million for indie developer Team Birdie, significantly more than their original funding target of $700. The company has neither released the game nor spoken publicly since.

In a recent thread on the official /r/ALBATROSSTheGame subreddit, thirty users chimed in with complaints about the long delay.

“I pledged $5,000 and have nothing to show for it,” commented Reddit user JokerSendMsg. “Where’s my exclusive Fruit of the Loom T-Shirt with Iron-on Decal? Where’s my Burger King Whopper signed by the dev team? Where’s … the game? This is a total disgrace.”

Angry backers looked into the company’s LLC filing to find the address of the headquarters, which is located in a small house in the middle of Kentucky. The developer reportedly consists of one employee, Tom Miller. After receiving hundreds of angry messages and letters, Miller broke the long silence in a Facebook Live video this morning.

“Well, when you look at it objectively, the majority of backers pledged at the ‘you get a thank-you email’ tier,” Miller explained, as he wiped a white dusty residue from his nose with a handful of $50 bills. “We’ve already sent that out ages ago, so we’ve basically fulfilled almost all of the rewards. I don’t see why you’re complaining.” He continued to dodge questions for almost twenty minutes while assuring viewers that his diamond-encrusted typing gloves and 80-inch television were “necessary expenses for game development.”

At press time, the official subreddit had gone private, and all further attempts to contact Team Birdie were met with silence. Team Birdie is currently under investigation by the IRS for tax evasion, and not under investigation whatsoever by Kickstarter.

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