Many of us don our black attire to attend the dreadful IEP meetings. It is possible to have a successful IEP meeting; however, as with facilitating any other business meeting, it takes structure, order and the proper training, mixed with a whole lot of kindness & consideration on both sides of the table.

I have attended numerous IEP meetings as both facilitator and parent of a special needs child. This unique perspective has generated positive outcomes for both school & families. There are 3 things a teacher can say to the parent(s) from the get go that will set the stage for an environment conducive to productivity and thoughtful interaction:

We want to hear your voice in this meeting. No one knows your child like you do. What you have to contribute to this IEP process is of tremendous value. We thank you in advance for your involvement and your input in our meeting today.

Your child is delightful & the strengths he displays at school are… We are eager to develop a plan that will provide him with the necessary supports to reach his potential.

We want to work together with you as a team to develop the appropriate goals & objectives that will serve to meet your child’s individual needs. It is our desire to have a seamless line of communication between school and home to monitor progress & to ensure that the plan in place is successful. If changes need to be made, we can certainly reconvene.

So often we bring to the case reviews a negative attitude with our defenses high, armed and ready for battle. The irony is most of us truly want what is best for the child. Breaking through the defenses by setting the stage in a kind and benevolent way allows for meaningful discussion about our primary objective: developing a successful IEP.

I have learned over the years that both parents and teachers are passionate people, particularly when it comes to children. Parents want what is best for their child and teachers work tirelessly to heed to their higher calling. So, the question often arises… Why the struggle?

I believe there is struggle because once a child is eligible under the auspices of a Specific Learning Disability (which is the area of eligibility for most of our special education students), the teacher really isn’t certain what to do to meet the child’s individual needs. Schools tend to have a protocol they use for all students in this category & this generic form of remediation is not diagnostic or prescriptive enough to provide the necessary support. This is a primary reason why parents and teachers are left frustrated and defeated.

Many special educators (& administrators) do not realize that as many as 80% of their students labeled as SLD have Dyslexia. This is at no fault of their own, but rather faulty training. How can we expect teachers to provide appropriate remedial tools when we do not even acknowledge Dyslexia in many of our schools (thankfully, this is changing). This is a tragedy when nearly 20% of our student population have Dyslexia.

A principal I worked for years ago said she hired me because I was certified in the Orton Gillingham Approach. I remember thinking at the time how impressed I was that she had even heard of the Orton Gillingham Approach. She was passionate about meeting the needs of the 1 in 5 at our school. Two years into my teaching at this wonderful, proactive school, our special education population went from 42% pass rate on standardized testing to 76%. There was nothing magical about me. I just had the right tools & techniques to send my students on the road to success. Many of my students were fully remediated and dismissed from my roster. I am a bit baffled as to why all school are not jumping all over OG to reap similar results.

To recap, there really is no substitute for bringing to the IEP table a kind and thoughtful energy that encourages collaboration instead of divisiveness. Secondly, if we truly want parents & teachers to leave the IEP table confident & at peace, it is essential to acknowledge Dyslexia & provide the teachers proper training in the Orton Gillingham Approach, so they no longer use a random school-wide program as a remedial tool, but rather one that has been proven effective for our population with Dyslexia for many decades.

The empathy I have gleaned over the years for those who sit on both sides of the IEP table has awarded me with many fruitful relationships with both parents and teachers. I would not trade my experiences for the world. I have gleaned so much from my students and my son, who is now an adult and is still teaching and inspiring me.

Keep doing what you’re doing because the world needs what only you have to offer.