Yesterday, I saw a gigantic billboard in the middle of the city that said, ‘You are what you drive’. It epitomizes our culture of consumerism.

We buy things hoping to find ourselves, to find happiness, only to realize that the joy of consumption fades quickly. iPhone 7 was exciting yesterday, but now that you have it, you cannot wait for iPhone 8.

Psychologists call this phenomenon, “hedonic adaptation”. In less fancy terms, what this term means is that “no matter what you buy, you’ll get used to it very quickly”.

To fight against our innate hedonic adaptation tendencies we need to cultivate an attitude of gratitude. We need to learn to love the things that we own.

Marie Kondo, the author of ‘The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up’, advices us to do two things to love the things that we own. One, get rid of things that do not spark joy in your heart. Two, only buy things that sparks joy — items that truly add value in our lives over the long term.

Using the “spark joy” filter to evaluate all our possessions may liberate us from the shackles hedonic adaptation.

“A dramatic reorganization of the home causes correspondingly dramatic changes in lifestyle and perspective. It is life transforming. I mean it. When you put your house in order, you put your affairs and your past in order, too. As a result, you can see quite clearly what you need in life and what you don’t, and what you should and shouldn’t do.” ~ Marie Kondo

I know it is possible to live a happy life owning just 150 items, I have done it for 2 years now. Let’s say you need 100 times that to be happy. 15,000 items is still only less than 5% of the average American household which has over 300,000 items.

Today we consume more than ever. The average size of the American home has nearly tripled in size over the past 50 years. And still, 1 out of every 10 Americans rent offsite storage.

But are we happier?

Studies show that rates of depression for Americans have risen dramatically in the past 50 years. Research published in The American Journal of Psychiatry found that major depression rates for American adults increased from 3.33 percent to 7.06 percent from 1991 through 2002.

In “The High Price of Materialism”, Tim Kasser shares research which shows that materialism lowers happiness in relationships. Materialism is also correlated increased rates of mental disorder. It makes people feel less competent, reduces feelings of relatedness, generates negative emotions, and makes them more self-centered.

What makes the mindless consumption even more tragic is that it forces us to neglect parts of our lives that do make us happy.

Research has shown that what makes people happy is investing in relationships, health, travel, hobbies and experiences. Each of those require the one resource that you squander when you chase material goods — TIME.

José Mujica, former president of Uruguay, talks about how people waste time in a society driven by consumerism

The average American family spends $1,700 on clothes annually. Yet, nearly half of American households don’t save any money. Have you wondered how much time are you giving up for clothes? Let’s do some rough math.

Assuming you invest $1,700/yearly ($142/monthly) from 24–65 in an index fund that gives you a reasonable 7% return, you will have accrued over $400,000 by 65 years of age. (FYI: It takes about 10 clicks to invest in an index funds at Wealthfront).

Thats 11 years of work for an average American. Whats even more tragic is that Americans throw away 65 pounds of clothing a year. If that is not the definition of throwing away your life, I don’t know what is.

I wish we used time as the currency of exchange in our stores, it would make an interesting conversation at the car dealership:

Buyer: How much does this car cost?

Salesmen: 6 years of your life sir.

Buyer: How about that one?

Salesmen: 5 years of your life, but it does not have heated seating.

“We buy things we don’t need with money we don’t have to impress people we don’t like.”~ Dave Ramsey

Economies can blossom and grow only if people are deluded into believing that the consumption will make them happy. If and only if people hold this false belief will they do enough producing, procuring, and consuming to sustain their economies.

But if we can step out of the trance of materialism we can see the world as it is. We can see that the most precious commodities are not our possessions but rather the friendships we create, the people we help, the experiences we have. It is family, health, sense of belonging, meaning and purpose. None of which require owning a bunch of stuff, but all of it requires time. Time that you are throwing away when you buy things that you don’t need. It is time you could have spent with your family, improving your health, working on your hobbies or traveling the world.

We spend most of our lives forgetting this truth — overlooking it, fleeing it, repudiating it. And the horror is that we succeed. We manage to avoid being happy while struggling to become happy, fulfilling one desire after the next. We hope that the next purchase will make us happy. When met with disappointment we raise the stakes and hope that the next will fulfill us.

It never ends.

To stop the cycle of consumption we need to learn to love the things that we own. It is better for our planet, health, relationships and personal well-being.

“I’d like to train parrots to say “It won’t make you happy!” I’d let them loose in shopping malls, big electronics stores, and car lots. Then, when people are considering spending their savings on a giant TV, or going deeply in debt with a new car, a surprising squawk might shock them back to their senses. The quickest way to double your income is to halve your expenses. Any study of happiness will tell you it’s best to actively appreciate what you’ve got.” ~ Derek Sivers

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