LOS ANGELES, CA — As Iron Man 3 makes its US premiere today, super hero movies are more ubiquitous than ever. Marvel Studios will be releasing at least 8 films over the next two years, and the Superman reboot has already been given an Oscar based on its trailer alone.

Unfortunately, one superhero has been left out of all the filmscreen fervor.

“I think they’re just waiting for the perfect script,” said Arthur Curry, alias Aquaman, from his small apartment in Watts. “They don’t want to waste such a titanic opportunity. They need something that will really make a splash.”

When we contacted our studio sources, however, all of them said they weren’t interested in making a movie about “the fish guy.”

“The guy can breath underwater. Big whoop. He became irrelevant when they invented scuba gear,” said one executive. “Oh, and the talking to dolphins thing? Yeah, real fucking useful when terrorists are attacking D.C.”

Still, Curry remains optimistic.

“I bet they’re just fishing for a gritty origin story,” he said, totally unironically. “They can use whatever they want, I don’t mind. I don’t even remember my own backstory, to be honest. All I know is that I wear green gloves and a shirt made of orange fish scales.”

“But I’m not married to those!” he added quickly after noticing our microphone.

As of press time, there are still no plans to develop an Aquaman movie.