Social media breeds hatin’

There is really no debatin’

But text messages from Satan?

I’m not certain I believe!

But an exorcism session

Didn’t lessen her possession

Now the priest hears her confession

Cos the devil will deceive!

Let’s take pity on the preacher

Such a poor and helpless creature

As he texts the girl, to teach her

She is in the hands of God

In reply, instead, a demon

Who was listenin’ in and schemin’

Now this sordid story’s seemin’

Unbelievable and odd

See, the devil’s getting busy

And the preacher’s in a tizzy

He’s a brave, brave man (or is he?—

Cos he’s maybe just a fool)

I suspect the priest is falling

For a bit of plain crank-calling—

Seems the teaching was appalling

In his exorcism school!

Via the Christian Post (because, why not?), just when you thought the concept of exorcism couldn’t get any stranger…

A Polish priest claims to be receiving text messages from Satan after performing an exorcism on a teenage girl. Father Marian Rajchel has said that he failed to drive out the demon that possessed the young girl and as a result, he is being haunted by the demon. “The author of these texts is an evil spirit who has possessed her soul,” Father Rajchel told the Austrian Times. “Often the owners of mobile phones are not even aware that they are being used like this.” The text messages are reportedly filled with hate and specific messages for the priest, who said that he is personally being attacked because of his failure to deliver a girl from demonic possession. The Times was able to read two of the messages, which had clear warnings for the priest.

Because that is the simplest explanation–it couldn’t be that some poor troubled teen, annoyed by some god-botherer’s insulting attention, decides to yank his chain a bit. “Oh, my, no, father, I would never have texted you something like that! I can’t imagine! It must have been the Devil made me do it!”

Cuttlecap tip to the morning newsreader (I did not catch her name) at RTR-FM.

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