Like most of the world, The Daily Show’s Jon Stewart expressed shock Monday night that Pope Benedict the XVI was resigning at the end of February.

“I assumed the Papacy was a lifetime commitment …like being in the mob or a correspondent on 60 Minutes. I just assumed you were there until you die.”

He then noted that a Roman Catholic Pope hasn’t retired in 600 years, before mocking mainstream media reporters who wondered what a retired Pope would do. Stewart said, “I’m not a religious scholar, but if I know anything about retired people, it’s probably the same as what they all do …Live Mas! Mother F**ker!”

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Daily Show regular Samantha Bee offered an interesting reason for the Pope’s surprise announcement. “Let’s just say he’s had a crisis of faith,” Bee said. “Since the whole Manti Te’o thing, the Pope has just started to question a long-term relationship with someone he talks to all the time, but has never actually met.”

Correspondent John Oliver also weighed in, suggesting that some high-profile Republicans would be uniquely qualified to fill the Pope’s red shoes, offering Mitt Romney, Rick Perry and Marco Rubio as possibilities.

“What would they know about appealing to a floundering organization, appealing to old white men, clinging to an arcane moral code who must reluctantly embrace change to stay relevant? You’re right, there’s not crossover there at all,” Oliver said.

Watch the full segment below, as aired on Comedy Central on February 11, 2013: