A pizza-delivery girl runs afoul of a wealthy socialite and her demon-worshipping cult in Satanic Panic, a new horror comedy from director Chelsea Stardust. Yes, it's kind of a bonkers premise, but the trailer is a lot of fun, mining the same cheekily irreverent vein as the Happy Death Day films.

Samantha "Sam" Craft (Hayley Griffith) is a pizza-delivery girl with regrets. She took this job for the tips, which turned out to be a bad business decision. "In four hours, my total earnings are an expired Applebee's coupon and a sweater that smells like racism," she complains. But when an order comes in from the well-heeled enclave of Mill Basin, she takes on the job, even though its technically outside the joint's delivery zone—apparently on the assumption that she'll finally get a decent tip.

What Sam gets instead is captured by a cult in need of a virgin sacrifice so they can summon Baphomet, a demon from Hell, thereby ensuring they stay rich and on top. "Death to the weak, wealth to the strong!" cult leader Danica Ross (Rebecca Romijn) declares.

Sam doesn't seem to be entirely without, er, allies. The skeevy, lecherous Samuel Ross (Jerry O'Connell) helpfully offers to deflower her to save her skin: "No virgin, no sacrifice. Let me protect you." Her best bet is Danica's rebellious daughter Judi (Ruby Modine), who warns, "My mom and her butt buddies are booty-calling Baphomet. And they're not gonna stop till you're strapped to a barbed wire altar." Sure, Danica and her acolytes have all the power, but Sam and Judi have youthful spunk and a keen desire to live. This being a comedy, I like their chances.

Of course, "satanic panic" is a genuine real-world phenomenon of mass hysteria that reached its peak in the 1980s. It's no laughing matter—certainly not for those falsely accused of ritual abuse. But as Thomas Browne once observed, "The devil... the proud spirit cannot endure to be mocked." So maybe Satanic Panic is doing the Lord's work by holding the whole tawdry mess up for well-deserved ridicule.

Satanic Panic opens in theaters on September 6, 2019.

YouTube/RLJE Films

YouTube/RLJE Films

YouTube/RLJE Films

YouTube/RLJE Films

YouTube/RLJE Films

YouTube/RLJE Films

YouTube/RLJE Films

YouTube/RLJE Films

YouTube/RLJE Films

YouTube/RLJE Films

YouTube/RLJE Films

YouTube/RLJE Films

YouTube/RLJE Films



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