Nothing unites people more than an outrage shared. Common goals and interests are all well and good, but it takes something more visceral to really bring us together.

To wit: the PFA Premier League Team of the Year (they mean "season", of course, but that is currently the least of their concerns), released into the wild on Thursday morning and instantly torn to pieces by the ravenous denizens of the football Twittersphere.

Looking at things soberly – and at the risk of putting a price on my head – it is not immediately apparent that the selection is so objectionable. It stands to reason that Chelsea and Tottenham should dominate proceedings, for a start, and one would struggle to begrudge the inclusion of any of the front six, all of whom have had excellent seasons. Some poor intern has probably been demoted to tea duty for putting Eden Hazard on the right and Sadio Mané on the left, but that's a minor quibble.

PFA Team of the Year Show all 11 1 /11 PFA Team of the Year PFA Team of the Year David De Gea (Manchester United) MANCHESTER, ENGLAND - APRIL 16: David de Gea of Manchester United celebrates after the Premier League match between Manchester United and Chelsea at Old Trafford on April 16, 2017 in Manchester, England. (Photo by Tom Purslow/Man Utd via Getty Images) Man Utd via Getty Images PFA Team of the Year Kyle Walker (Tottenham) LONDON, ENGLAND - APRIL 15: Kyle Walker of Tottenham Hotspur shows appreciation to the fans after the Premier League match between Tottenham Hotspur and AFC Bournemouth at White Hart Lane on April 15, 2017 in London, England. (Photo by Tottenham Hotspur FC/Tottenham Hotspur FC via Getty Images) Getty PFA Team of the Year Gary Cahill (Chelsea) PFA Team of the Year David Luiz (Chelsea) MANCHESTER, ENGLAND - APRIL 16: David Luiz of Chelsea looks on during the Premier League match between Manchester United and Chelsea at Old Trafford on April 16, 2017 in Manchester, England. (Photo by Michael Regan/Getty Images) Getty Images PFA Team of the Year Danny Rose (Tottenham) SOUTHAMPTON, ENGLAND - DECEMBER 28: Danny Rose of Tottenham Hotspur celebrates as Dele Alli of Tottenham Hotspur scores their fourth goal during the Premier League match between Southampton and Tottenham Hotspur at St Mary's Stadium on December 28, 2016 in Southampton, England. (Photo by Julian Finney/Getty Images) Getty Images PFA Team of the Year N'Golo Kante (Chelsea) STOKE ON TRENT, ENGLAND - MARCH 18: N'Golo Kante of Chelsea in action during the Premier League match between Stoke City and Chelsea at Bet365 Stadium on March 18, 2017 in Stoke on Trent, England. (Photo by Laurence Griffiths/Getty Images) Getty Images PFA Team of the Year Dele Alli (Tottenham) Getty PFA Team of the Year Eden Hazard (Chelsea) Chelsea's Belgian midfielder Eden Hazard runs with the ball during the English Premier League football match between Chelsea and Manchester City at Stamford Bridge in London on April 5, 2017. / AFP PHOTO / Adrian DENNIS / RESTRICTED TO EDITORIAL USE. No use with unauthorized audio, video, data, fixture lists, club/league logos or 'live' services. Online in-match use limited to 75 images, no video emulation. No use in betting, games or single club/league/player publications. / (Photo credit should read ADRIAN DENNIS/AFP/Getty Images) AFP/Getty Images PFA Team of the Year Sadio Mane (Liverpool) Liverpool's Senegalese midfielder Sadio Mane celebrates after scoring the opening goal of the English Premier League football match between Liverpool and Everton at Anfield in Liverpool, north west England on April 1, 2017. / AFP PHOTO / Paul ELLIS / RESTRICTED TO EDITORIAL USE. No use with unauthorized audio, video, data, fixture lists, club/league logos or 'live' services. Online in-match use limited to 75 images, no video emulation. No use in betting, games or single club/league/player publications. / (Photo credit should read PAUL ELLIS/AFP/Getty Images) AFP/Getty Images PFA Team of the Year Romelu Lukaku (Everton) LIVERPOOL, ENGLAND - APRIL 09: Romelu Lukaku of Everton celebrates scoring his team's fourth goal during the Premier League match between Everton and Leicester City at Goodison Park on April 9, 2017 in Liverpool, England. (Photo by Michael Steele/Getty Images) Getty Images PFA Team of the Year Harry Kane (Tottenham) LONDON, ENGLAND - APRIL 08: Harry Kane of Tottenham Hotspur looks on during the Premier League match between Tottenham Hotspur and Watford at White Hart Lane on April 8, 2017 in London, England. (Photo by Tottenham Hotspur FC/Tottenham Hotspur FC via Getty Images) Tottenham Hotspur FC via Getty I

The principal lines of complaint have centred on the back five. David De Gea in goal over, say, Tom Heaton? No César Azpilicueta, to many minds Chelsea's most reliable defender this season? And Gary Cahill? Over Toby Alderweireld? Really?! They publish this and expect us not to riot?

The first law of the digital age (football + internet = anger) ensures that picking these teams is a thankless task. But someone has to do it and if you read the title of this piece you will have already gleaned that I am one of those someones. The question, now the smoke is beginning to clear, is this: how would that XI get on against the equivalent teams representing Europe's other top leagues?

Clearly, this is purely speculative. You're doubtless already quaking with anger at the teams below. But some rough methodology has been employed: (1) These sides, like the PFA's, are based on domestic league performances. (2) The players selected had to fit into a vaguely feasible tactical set-up – no 2-3-5 formations here. (3) As the Premier League XI featured players from five different teams, that has been taken as a minimum requirement to prevent, say, a team of 11 Bayern Munich players.

Capiche? On with the show…

La Liga

Jan Oblak (Atlético Madrid); Dani Carvajal (Real Madrid), Sergio Ramos (Real Madrid), Diego Godín (Atlético Madrid), Filipe Luís (Atlético Madrid); Jonathan Viera (Las Palmas), Steven N'Zonzi (Sevilla); Antoine Griezmann (Atlético Madrid), Lionel Messi (Barcelona), Neymar (Barcelona); Luis Suárez (Barcelona)

Selection process

With apologies to Toni Kroos and Luka Modrić, the team-quota system ensures midfield spots for Steven N'Zonzi, who has had a fine season with Sevilla, and Las Palmas magician Jonathan Viera. Aside from that it's very much a Barcelona-Madrid affair.

Chances against PFA XI

That backline would take some beating, for a start: the Diego Godín/Sergio Ramos pairing is probably the best in any of these sides and their experience would be a big factor against Romelu Lukaku and Harry Kane. Dani Carvajal might not have a great time if Hazard and Danny Rose double up and N'Golo Kanté might boss the midfield, but it's hard to see that Spanish attack failing to make hay. La Liga wins.

Serie A

Gianluigi Buffon (Juventus); Mattia Caldara (Atalanta), Federico Fazio (Roma), Giorgio Chiellini (Juventus), Alex Sandro (Juventus); Mohamed Salah (Roma), Miralem Pjanić (Juventus), Radja Nainggolan (Roma), Alejandro Gómez (Atalanta); Dries Mertens (Napoli), Andrea Belotti (Torino)

Selection process

Juventus are naturally well represented, although there's no place for forwards Gonzalo Higuain and Paulo Dybala. Instead, the line is led by Napoli's Dries Mertens and Torino hitman Andrea Belotti, who edges out Edin Džeko to take us up to five teams. Alejandro 'Papu' Gómez is a shoo-in at the end of a wonderful season, while Atalanta team-mate Mattia Caldara plays slightly of position because Dani Alves has only started 13 games.

Chances against PFA XI

You imagine Kane would be licking his lips at the prospect of facing Federico Fazio, who has been solid for Roma but flopped at Tottenham. Hazard vs Caldara looks a mismatch, too, not least because the latter won't get much defensive help from Mo Salah. The midfield battle probably goes Serie A's way – Dele Alli is going to spend most of his time bombing on – but the PFA XI looks too powerful on the flanks. Premier League wins.

Bundesliga

Manuel Neuer (Bayern Munich); Lukasz Piszczek (Borussia Dortmund), Niklas Süle (Hoffenheim), Mats Hummels (Bayern Munich), Sead Kolašinac (Schalke); Arjen Robben (Bayern Munich), Thiago Alcântara (Bayern Munich), Naby Keïta (RB Leipzig), Emil Forsberg (RB Leipzig); Robert Lewandowski (Bayern Munich), Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang (Borussia Dortmund)

Selection process

Naby Keïta and Emil Forsberg are rewarded for breakout campaigns at RB Leipzig and Niklas Süle sneaks in just before he swaps Hoffenheim for Bayern in the summer. In-demand Schalke full-back Sead Kolašinac starts on the left of the defensive line, while the right-back berth goes to Lukasz Piszczek, who has been among the goals for Borussia Dortmund.

Chances against PFA XI

The strike pairing of Robert Lewandowski and Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang could make mincemeat of Cahill and David Luiz on their day, so you'd fancy the Bundesliga XI to score a couple. There's also plenty of craft and athleticism, but a perhaps slight lack of experience, mainly due to the fact we couldn't pick too many Bayern players. Manuel Neuer is a formidable barrier in goal, but Kane, Alli and co would probably have some joy against that defence. High-scoring draw.

Ligue 1

Yoan Cardinale (Nice); Thomas Meunier (Paris Saint-Germain), Kamil Glik (Monaco), Thiago Silva (Paris Saint-Germain), Benjamin Mendy (Monaco); Ryad Boudebouz (Montpellier), Jean Seri (Nice), Fabinho (Monaco), Thomas Lemar (Monaco); Edinson Cavani (Paris Saint-Germain), Alexandre Lacazette (Lyon)

Selection process

The temptation was to overload on Monaco players, but we've spread the love in recognition of the fact that, for much of the season, it has been a three-horse race for the French title. Thomas Meunier and Edinson Cavani have had excellent seasons for PSG, while Nice are represented by midfield dynamo Jean Seri and young goalkeeper Yoan Cardinale. Kylian Mbappé misses out so we can meet the club quota, with attacking spots for Lyon's prolific Alexandre Lacazette and Ryad Boudebouz of Montpellier.

Chances against PFA XI