Online communication can be a cryptic labyrinth of hidden meanings at times. You can’t see the squinting eyes, the shrugging shoulders, or the nervous sweating—who knows if that tongue-sticking-out emoji is really sincere?

Gay singles have been just as lost as the rest of the world when it comes to decoding the truth behind those digital messages, but now it’s time to come out of the dark!

Here’s a somewhat-serious beginner’s guide to decoding the messages gay men are sending to figure out what they are really trying to say:

The First Message:

He Says: He means:

He Says: He means:

Compliments:

He Says: He means:



He Says: He means:



He Says: He means:



Questions:

He Asks: He means:

He Asks: He means:



He Asks: He means:





Celebrity References:

He Says: He means:



He Says: He means:



He Says: He means:



The Next Step:

He Says: He means:



Ok, so maybe this guide is a little presumptuous—but if you follow it to the letter you’ll find that it’s right at least 15% of the time. Statistically speaking.

The fact is, even this self-appointed expert doesn’t have all the answers. You’re talking to a real, live, sincere (probably cute) human being, so keep on chatting away and get to really know them.

You’ll find the truth between the text messages.

Did you enjoy this post? Then make sure to check out 8 Body Confessions From Gay Single Men.

About Coffee Meets Bagel (CMB): CMB is a free dating service that helps members make meaningful connections. It’s designed for busy singles who want to find something real with little or no effort.