(Image: Spike TV)

Like an 18-year-old high school kid named Dougie, who’s suddenly insisting he’s “Douglas” now that college time has rolled around, Spike TV has announced that it’ll soon be rebranding itself as the Paramount Network. According to The Hollywood Reporter, the new name will kick in some time next year, presumably giving the channel enough time to scratch “Spike” out on its Trapper Keeper, and hide all its pictures of heavy metal sword fights and such.


The change comes as the channel’s old “TV for MEN!” remit undergoes some continental drift; the network’s most prominent original show, Lip Sync Battle, is fairly gender neutral, while shows like Bar Rescue and Ink Master don’t scream “24/7 mancave forever!!!” either. Instead, the channel is transitioning into a place where Paramount (and its parent company, Viacom) can develop more content with a cross-platform focus. Meanwhile, it’s worth noting that the last time Paramount had its own self-branded network—good old UPN, back in the mid-’90s—it produced such culturally persistent fare as Nowhere Man and Homeboys In Outer Space. We can only hope this new Paramount Network will have things so good.