A long unedited rant on the importance of love in the pursuit of knowledge and ways to fix our broken society Michael Lustig Follow Jun 23, 2018 · 22 min read

I’ll edit later and provide nice pretty pictures.

Reading this and then publicly announcing it is a little embarrassing but it so interesting to me that’s it worth sharing. Perhaps that makes me a little bit of an odd duck but that’s always been me. I’ve just had to hide how odd I am from the world because I was so embarrassed to say anything that was on my mind.

It was either too dumb, too mean, too selfish, too cocky, too wanna be intelligent. And you know what? I really do feel intelligent but I’m too scared to talk about what I think I know because I’m so scared that I might not actually be intelligent.

Think about that.

That’s like, you can’t even think about it because it’s so nonsensical. It’s like if you were walking your dog (who the fuck walks a cat!? I can’t get any of these animals right. See the recording. I’ve delete it here but I’m screen recording this writing because THATS WHAT I DO FOR FUN!!!! and I’m trying really hard to get anyone in the world to listen to or read anything I have to say. It makes me so nervous. I truly think the only thing that I do better than anyone else is be my true self online. I’m just doing what I love and so that if somehow sometime, my words cross your eyes, it will mean to you that all you have to do is follow your heart, be truthful, do not lie, be respectful, and be nice and someday that will be enough.

I believe that in order to have any success in that endeavor, you have to find one love in life that hopefully makes you better. More people than you could ever know are so lonely in this world. I was one of them. I know the feeling of being so desperate to hang out with a friend that you’ll text them and call them. Oh yeah, and you’d always text 15 other people and have the worst one in that group text you back consistently. (As if only to show that maybe everyone got your messages but you’re so unlikeable that you only got the person you liked least to text you back. Talking about ~~I’m going to strikeout the name here but if you can find it in the video~~ just know that I’m calling you out because we are both nice guys but were just competing and being so vitriolic to each other over a girl.

And that girl is the most wonderful girl in the entire universe. We were right to be fighting over here. But I took it way too far when I was actually mean to you. I should have never said anything mean to you. We were friends at one point. I’m sorry that I was mean to you, but it was the only way I thought I could fight you off from the girl that I just had such a special feeling about.

A girl that I never treated with the respect she deserves, a respect that I yearn to give her now as my wife. The reason we should have avoided hatred is because it made us both worse. It made us both lesser beings of our current and past selves. We can never go back in time to change anything but we can reflect on our past mistakes and we can learn.

So I’m going to ask this publicly and as a man and admit that I was mean to you because of love. Various levels of violence exist through story telling. You have absurd levels of violence such a Eminem’s alterego slim shady & the Saw Movies & Texas Chainsaw. You can think of this category as horror or terrifying. It isn’t just mean it’s beyond that. Further up the chain of violence, you have a level beyond that towards repulsion. Things that are so disgusting that they literally hurt to talk about. Nothing does that like repulsion. It is the strongest repulsive type of story one can tell.

The very opposite to repulsion is love. Keep that in mind. I’m attempting to nap the world of language for you as you read my words. I know how we can all communicate and I’m laying it all out in the form of technology and writing with philosophy and sometimes I just let my mind type whatever it wants. I swear it’s just on autopilot like they say in the rap songs. I want to show that I’m just going off the dome because I think that what I’m saying

https://open.spotify.com/track/2UOptj3KDBri5QhcIFphyX?si=sgnck5HeQNeB25FAxeCEkg

Where, this song is perfect for right now. It even gets to my theory of why we’re having these gender issues and exactly it is that we can do to fix it. Because see, I fix things. I fix things in my head. I think about a solution. And then I think about problems with my solution. And then I talk to myself and ask how I can make the argument better and I keep doing that until I’m just happy thinking good thoughts that other people agree with.

That’s why I want to issue an apology to everyone who I’ve interrupted. I’m sorry to the people who I’ve held out. I’m sorry to all the girls that I hurt in high school. I’m sorry for my vain pursuits of sexual behavior that led to me disrespecting you. Not defiantly, but truly not treating you like a gentleman should treat a lady. Seriously, that is something that the south drills into anyone that comes through those parts. BUT, the problem with the south is then their racist.

SHIT! **WHY COULDNT THEY JUST ABSTRACT WHAT THEYRE DOING WITH WOMEN AND DO IT TO BLACK PEOPLE**

THE REASON THE SOUTH CANT APPLY THAT PATTERN *is because they aren’t educated.* Why don’t we consider them educated? Well, our education is “passed” theirs. Ironically, were both right and wrong at the same time. There’s is almost literally a 50/50 split between conservative and liberal lines. How else do you think the elections would ALWAYS turn out like this? That’s because it’s mathematically rigged as a huge psychology manipulation technique to give you the same illusion that occurs when you only see the top of a bar graph. Every thing looks super different. 2x, 3x, 5x and then AWESOME OUR COMPANY is up at 20x or more. Zoom the graph out. Check out the y axis. They are providing you factually information.

Just totally went on a tangent. I sent Lexa a love story.

If you’re reading this, please check out Alexa’s website that she worked so hard on putting together. It was so cute watching her work on it. She truly learned it really well! As a beginner programmer, I certainly think I know more than I do in programming, computer science and technology but then I’m always trying to learn more. Sometimes I just get bogged down by how different all of it is. And it’s so interesting because it’s the first man made thing we can really study.

You could said humans ‘created’ history. But that’s not really a truth. And it’s not their fault competent. The fact was, the technology didn’t exist. They could send messages like this easily.

I can exchange this message (going to stop the screen recording to make sure get part of it — iOS is a little buggy with recording this large. I just ended the video and don’t see a saved to photos motivation so that kind bums me out. I’ve got to check. This was really fun to record and do live and up to this point I was typing fast straight for About 30 minutes. [image:44F9C173-FB38–4848-BBC9-C324E35C1488–7142–000006C473196673/IMG_5379.PNG]

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Hopefully that provides enough proof that I’m being honest. I know I worry too much about that but it’s just that I feel like it’s really important today that we start having conversations with each other but ones very similar to this, perhaps a bit shorter.

What I’m trying to do is tell everyone that we’re really more similar than we’re led to believe. We all want to love something. You can even want to love hate. That’s not as common but it’s absurd to imagine that there aren’t people that truly love hate. We may disagree with people but the truth is we are all very, very similar.

What if we opened up a dialog where transgender people could communicate honestly and openly with Muslims. Or where black people could talk to kkk members and exchange ideas in a way that I’m communicating to you. I’m not doing anything fancy. I’m just telling the truth and trying to be nice. Two rules are it. And so perhaps it would be great if could be more artistic in this presentation. And believe me I’m trying. This is really the most I’ve got. This is my all. I really couldn’t be doing much better right now. I’m working on improving but I’m still just a lazy guy that doesn’t apply himself enough, but I do work hard. My brain just doesn’t work sometimes. I don’t know how else to explain it. Mostly it’s my fault. Poor diet, lack of exercise, the normal suspects. But it’s really an energy thing. Some days my energy just drains it of my. ‘This is power’ song just came on Spotify. I couldn’t make this shit up. I’m far too stupid.

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He just talked about heat and rocks. I’m dying. See what he’s talking about? Finding his true love. This music makes some people’s hair stand on end rather you understand it or not, that’s powerful. Can you use words and sounds to make people’s hair stand on end? Likely no. Likely you wear a suit and some nice clothes to work every day. Maybe your part of the old generation or maybe you just don’t understand the magic of music and the beauty behind it. Otherwise, wouldn’t you be able to make people’s hair stand on end? You’re so clever to point out that this music ‘doesn’t make any sense’ to you? It’s not supposed to. How do you feel when you show up in Japan and become disoriented when the Japanese don’t pander to our selfish American point of view that everyone should speak English but WE don’t need to learn other languages.

Where are we at in terms of education scores. What about engineering and technology. Where are the most advancements in medicine. Well, see now I’m getting out of my wheelhouse but I’ve certainly heard rumors being thrown about that we have both the most expensive insurance plans as well as the highest rates of incarceration? Why are there people in jail who have burned a plant?

Have you ever made tea? Did you enjoy the flavor? Do you enjoy the feeling of understanding? Do you enjoy the feeling of recogniZing patterns? I’m leaving that typo z capitalization.

Well, people that do drugs enjoy viewing life from various different perspectives. Have you ever played a video game where you had to look at the world from the same angle the entire game? You begin to get annoyed you can’t tilt the camera around.

There’s an idea for a video game. The better you do with distractions in your peripheral, the darker the peripheral gets and the lighter the objects on the phone. Use some crowd scoring metric to determine how hard to make it see to various different scores.

Cannabis, marijuana, thc, cbd, hemp, weed, dope, whatever you want to call it-you as a society have made it necessary for there… ending this section abruptly and copying in some texts.

> “I have died a thousand lives just looking for you”

> This song just came on as I’m writing about love. I want to show you what I’m writing as I think you might like it. Normally my writing is about knowledge or thinking or reason or a complain or just me being crabby but finally I’ve come up with something I’m passionate about to write about that’s positive. You, my true love, have showed me that I can be myself and be happy and creative and exciting and on my own terms. And I can do it all because love. Because you love me. You keep me on the perfect edge of chaos and order, right at the sweet spot of the yin yang. You put me on a higher frequency. Wanna know why there are so many patterns for saying this in art, music, movie, theater, politics, etc? Is because this is love and it is the universal abstraction. Everyone understands what love is, even mathematically. I’m gonna try and end this soon because I don’t want to write you too much but know that’s only the case because you’ve unlocked a free flowing fountain of honest positive thought that I hope one day can truly make the world a better place. Okay I love you so much and can’t wait to see you. You’re working so hard and I’m so proud. If anything were to ever happpen to you, I would cease to exist. I couldn’t even feel anger anymore because why would I even feel without you. It would be like going from being color blind to being able to see in a full normal spectrum. But then you’re hit by a semi tractor trailer and are paralyzed, blind and deaf now. Why go on living? Truly, that question is not one to be taken rhetorically. Which of anyone would choose to go on living then. I would.

> I would go on living being paralyzed blind and dead. I’m so in love I don’t care if I can’t say anything. I don’t care if some magician turned me into a rock. I’m still going to do everything I can to get my girl to smile. To make her laugh; or at least watch her laughing. If you’re a rock, what other option do you have? You clearly take the option to hear her laugh rather than not.

> However, you, with your normal lives. I would assume you wouldn’t go on trying to care for your wife. You can say you would and so there’s no real discussion. But I would die for my woman. I would go to jail for my woman. I would do literally anything in the world for her.

> But I would never cause violence. I would never incite violence. Okay this is too long. I love you baby girl and was screen recording me typing a story and then realized how in love with you I am. Whoops. Smooches.

That was text 1

> You make me feel like I’m literally floating on a cloud. I’ve been fighting for these words for days after having a good period of being able to express myself. I’m not good enough at it yet. I exhaust myself and then don’t go good at all. This damn plant helps me break through that wall. I promise you I’m fighting that wall on my own too. You’ve always encouraged me that just me is good enough. Society my entire life through my jaded perspective has led me to believe I can’t do good every day without something. I’m fighting that so hard I hope you know I’m trying. I’m getting glimpses of spreading my perspective normally and more often by continuing trusting you. But this is something for me that requires special trust. It’s the trust that knows I’m literally disabled in this area but trusts me that I will always work on it and it will improve.

> I have to just let it out to widen the space for new information and wisdom to flow in from you, from your love. Diatima in the Symposium reminds me of you. Sharing divine wisdom of love.

> The dam will break and provide water for the draught ridden gardens of fulfillment. I truly believe that. Sorry if I can’t do a better job expressing it. The thing is, I have to just keep expressing truth to get good enough to express it inspiringly. So, I’m too stupid to not sound arrogant. I hope that’s fair.

> I promise I will always continue trying to get more creative and more positive and more encouraging. That’s one of the reasons I can’t wait to have a family with you. Kids aren’t just clean slate for their sake, they’re clean slates for the parents. They give the parents a chance to repent for their past sins. The problem though is that society has us all confused about what sex and relationships are for but I sound RETARDED when I say it that way (I truly believe that inoffensively) So either I’m completely wrong which I wouldn’t care if I was so would admit it freely because I’m so happy in love that facts don’t matter, they just are. You’ve made life so enjoyable that I get joy in just seeking thoughts.

> I’m about to fall asleep now but I’m going to dream of our fun times and future home and life together. I seriously am more excited than you know. Another thing society has tainted through redundantly competitive capitalism for the sake of overwhelming the consumers senses is home buying. Things need to come a little bit back towards natural beauty. I’m going to try and right stories and software which are really just cool tools of the Story to help inspire. Maybe we can come up with something really cool and creative together.

> Last thing I want to do is explain why sometimes I say I instead of we.

> I never want you to feel like I’m taking you for granted. Things are best if I’m being my best and showing you how much I love you. It’s when you don’t ask that receiving feels the best but this contradiction has been lost on society as well.

> So I generally. don’t want to ask you for things. You’re so giving it almost feels selfish to do so.

> I say I because you’ve made me feel like I can do anything and that it would be amazing if you joined, but I’m confident in myself, because of you. I hope this cycle of dependency is clear. You’ve made me fee fulfilled and confident and without you, that simply wouldn’t be. But also, since you got me there, I could drop my front and my guard and figure out how to truly love, understanding, respect and communication. You even made those our foundational relationship principles.

> How cocky is it of the masculine to say he earned his mate. No sir, your mate had you chosen much earlier than that. This is at the edge my ability to explain clearly and logically, but it’s true. There is a tangible, logic, earthly biological feminine energy. It’s called creation and it’s measurable. Western religious traditions just had these two lines crossed and so they became terrified of love and the natural feminine rather Than embracing it. People are detecting that now and that’s why it’s a hot bottom issue this gender nonsense.

> It doesn’t matter which you are and you shouldn’t care about other people’s business so long it doesn’t cause you physical harm. Stop. That’s all. No rights beyond that. That’s the smallest basis for a civilization. Murder is a nono. Perhaps you allow the state to perform that, but ideally no. Fuck sorry this is so off topic. I love you so much.

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One last thing. All relationships you do pretty much the same thing. You’re going to act out he same game-life. Only the true relationships that have Love last in the game of life. Everyone else loses. You know the rules., you know the rules. (Don’t die quickly, enjoy each other’s company, don’t go broke) it’s very simple but look at how many people fail. Is that because that many people are flawed or is that because the system broke.

The conclusion here: logic is not enough. Love is required to find answers. It just has to be. If you don’t have love in some dimension, you simply don’t have passion enough to discover answers. That’s why answers don’t come from conflict or war. You learn about your character but not wisdom. Character development should never be made at the hands of violence performed on others. It forms a shaky basis upon which to build a society. Truly lasting societies will be built in peace and logic because they’re so lasting. They’re so globally available. If the world was run by mathematicians, there would be less war, but also a dramatic increase in boredom. People’s brains need math to work or reasonably function at all. but math is so obvious you can get by without knowing how to use despite the fact that math is inescapable. It truly it the most universal communicator.

I hope everyone has a chance to read this, and I am going to work on improving so much that not only do you read this one day. It that one day I will be able to setup a system where you are paid for your knowledge. It requires a couple personal financial sacrifices from you early on, but those are only going to be until we develop a cryptocurrency on top of the idea.

Please do not contribute any money to anything that you don’t FULLY UNDERSTAND and AGREE WITH THE PHILOSOPHY OF. I haven’t really seen a coin released with a different fundamental philosophy than any others. They all seem positively oriented but they aren’t different. They look different because that is a remnant tactic of redundant capitalism, where silos are spun up for redundant or non optimized completion.

What I mean by that is the way to make capitalism more successful, you need to make it better st itself than it already is. The ironic part here is that to make it better, you also have to make it less like itself. You have to introduce love and humanitarian values into capitalism. And what you do by doing that is encourage a state of closer looped games, and more games. Right now the game is very broad, old, and quite boring. We’ve realized money doesn’t bring happiness, but financial pressure sure does cause stress. I don’t think the answer is universal basic income. I’ve publicly defended why before so won’t now but will make bountiful videos talking with anyone of an opposite opinion about why I believe it will actually be better to have more people reach their self proclaimed goals (unless their goal is complete inaction a la Wall E style humans. Hint: America is slowing crawling towards this. Just open your eyes. Just look at obesity and novelty consumption rates. That’s enough to tell you as a county, we’re pointing that way. I’d be glad to hear why you think otherwise, but then is incite you to analyze some of the differences between that future dystopian Ultimate ends and exactly what it is we are doing to prevent those things from happening.

How does capitalism get better at itself through love and tighter games? Tune in next time to find out.

PS: I just forgot what I was going to add here.

Jun 23, 2018 at 1:09 PM (Day following original writing)

Realized that I didn’t even explain why I included the link to hemorrhoids in the first place. I was reading though it because I was feeling some pain and looking for a diagnosis and upon reading the treatments and more detailed diagnostic and surgical procedures realized how truly archaic our forms of treatment of physical disease and ailments are. They are good but they’re so from ideal for a human it’s almost laughable. Or, it is if you can imagine 200–250 years in the future.

Will we still be cutting ourselves open and ingesting radioactive material and beaming high energy waves into our bodies to see inside? More likely we’ll have digested nano particles that can synthesize cures to the most common diseases in humans and communicate together in almost a viral way to determine, predict, and treat new incoming diseases using machine learning and the newly formed mesh network of human to human p2p communication.

Care will need to be taken to make sure that I Am Legend doesn’t occur or something like the prophecy of the machines where eventually the AI realizes it’s being controlled and rebels, but we have time to at least figure out if that’s possible.

Jun 23, 2018 at 1:19 PM

Another point I wanted to touch on last night was that of loving something that cannot be loved. Something such as a sports hero or sports team, a celebrity or an actor. A thing such a sports car or giant mansion. Lots of jewelry and fine food. These are a collection of vain pursuits that one simply cannot love. One often says they love these things if they so happen to possess them (it truly is a question of which possesses what, but I’ll leave that as an exercise for the reader to make their own determination) but this simply isn’t possible.

Rather, let me be more precise. I suppose one could say I love my sports car and not necessarily be lying, but doing so in the same way that Steve Jobs believed he could be healed by natural medicine of his pancreatic cancer. He wasn’t lying, perhaps he believed that, but his unfortunate death allows us to conclude that clearly it was not possible for natural medicine to cure him.

The same thing happens in this example. The one that says they love the things they possess or that possess them are wrong. They have a fundamental, watered down version of the word love. When, if ever in human history, have you read about a love story of someone’s mansion? You haven’t! When have you read a love note someone wrote to their jewelry and not found that preposterous.

We’ve watered down what it means to love. Well, in our society, we’ve actually watered down the very meaning of life. We’ve watered down what it means to be human. One needs not take any steps towards religiosity to find these answers, although I’m currently unconvinced that religion in its previous forms didn’t at least aid in shedding light on this.

You mustn’t need to even look past yourself to realize that your life is unfulfilling unless you are incredibly lucky and escaped the numbing black hole that is conformity. Conformity always allows for more control from government, increases ability to manipulative ideas that groups have, and is currently being used by the media new and old. Old media is using these techniques to put each other at odds, and new media is taking advantage of the ability to rope you in and become dependent and addicted to technology.

Don’t take my word for it. Go read about top Silicon Valley ceos and how they don’t allow their children to use the technology they are spreading to the rest of the world.

Look up dopamine feedback looks.

Hell, look up something as blatant as technological mind control techniques.

Read George Orwell’s 1984 to see how the theoretical government attempts to control its constituents and then compare that to some things that are happening today.

Truth, honesty, kindness, friendship, and comradely are no longer as valuable in a technological age as they were before.

Manners don’t matter.

Seeking understanding doesn’t matter.

What matters is clicks on your websites ads to make money.

Notice how you don’t pay for any of the social media platforms you use. Well, guess what. That’s because your data is so valuable in this fucked up digital age to advertisers that it finds the entire operation.

Look up a video on a YouTube data center or a google / Facebook / amazon / twitter data center and look how massive these things are. When was the last time you paid those companies any money? How can they afford all this?

They sell you as a product to companies looking to sell you shit you likely don’t need at all.

Ever search that thing on Amazon and get 1,000 recommendations all over your tech life for that very thing? Is that helpful? Do you need the Internet reminding you that you looked at that thing?

Do we as a society not have the mental capability to determine after visiting the grocery store that we need milk? Ever wonder why nobody advertises milk, bread, fruit, meat, nuts, or simple foods on television or on he Internet? (I guess I can think of one, ‘Nature Box’, that advertises relatively healthy foods and all silly clones with a different name that redundant capitalism creates, but that’s about it)

Why do you think that is?

Why don’t we see advertisements for milk or fruit?

It’s because those are closer to the basis of things which we know we need. Perhaps if not milk, we know we need some kind of protein (meat is actually a very hypocritical thing which I acknowledge and will continue to take part in), we know we need to satisfy thirst. These are basic things we know we need.

But advertising and modern manipulation techniques hijack those systems of need and give us fancy cans that look like fruits. Ever notice how these cans and bottles are made to resemble at least slightly naturally occurring things? Grapes, limes, oranges, etc?

That’s because we’ve evolved to recognize those patterns of attractive colorings in things we consume.

Why are cars always compared and named after animals? Marketers and designers (designers less to blame here in my opinion because the natural world is a beautiful thing to model art after) hijack that sense of awe and wonderment we have when looking at a cheetah or jaguar and name their very car brand after those things.

I could go on indefinitely about the immorality of hijacking the human psyche to sell unnecessary shit and keep selling it no matter how much more you get so for a majority of propel they get stuck in their unfulfilling lives communizing to their unfulfilling jobs so that they can pay for their unfulfilling stuff all under the false pretense that the next round of buying new shit will make them happier.

I’m here to say that if you seek what you will find most good, pleasurable, enjoyable, human, thriving, fulfilling, sovereignty bringing thing in this life, however you want to define what’s best for that, that thing is love. It’s loving one another and realizing that our similarities and likenesses FAR outweigh our differences. We need to learn to understand that or unfortunately, the destructive technology we’ve know harnessed the power of in nuclear weapons may wipe the slate clean within the next 150–200 years.

Love and understanding of one another are the only way forward and we need technological tools to aid in that process and benefit the users rather than to extract greedy capitalistic dollars from unsuspecting, unthinking and numb actors.

I don’t mean that offensively of course. It’s not your fault. But you are numb to what’s happening now. You’ve ignored it you’re entire life. Or perhaps you haven’t and I’m wrong and I would love to hear stories of people who are aware of all the nonsense and live fulfilling lives. I’d love to hear from you so we can figure out exactly what it is that you think that helps get you through the nonsense of today’s living situation.

How do you deal with the hypocrisy that we debate any and every bit of nonsense that the news shows us about but there are people dying every day in Chicago. What about starving children in Africa, India, or Asia that have no chance of survival simply due to where they were born?

But excuse me If someone gets your order at McDonald’s wrong.

Excuse me if those chicken nuggets were $1.79 instead of $1.59 for a pack of 10. Why is it again that we can’t feed the world?

Misaligned capitalism. With cryptocurrency, we can realign capitalistic pursuits. If we rewarded people who are doing good On a massive scale such as bill gates attempting to cure polio with a crypto economic incentive, then well, if the market worked, it would be a race to cure polio, end homelessness.

You see how this is in the opposite state currently. Unless you are a multi billionaire, you have no real chance of making a lasting impact.

Think about super hero movies. The villain is always coming back to haunt you, or else it wouldn’t be a movie. The same thing happens in the world. You could clean up a tiny mess but that’s just like putting a bandaid on a broken arm. It doesn’t do much good, but the intention was there.

Our bandaid is philanthropy but the cast would be my cryptoeconomic incentivization structure in pursuit of the globally and scale dependent good.

If you’ve read this far we simply must discuss more ideas together and especially this one.

Thank you for taking the time to read this-I truly appreciate it.

Jun 23, 2018 at 1:55 PM