Me: “How can I help you?”

Customer: “My son told me that to get broadband I’d have to pay more money, but I told him that there was this thing from the phone company you put on the telephone cord that gave you broadband.”

Me: “You mean a noise canceler, sir? That is only for DSL lines through the phone company, not through us.”

Customer: “Diesel… Yeah, that’s what I want! So, can you hook me up with diesel broadband?”

Me: “Sir, I’m sorry we don’t offer D-S-L Lines. You have to call your phone company and have them installed.”

Customer: “Do you have unleaded lines?”

Me: “Sir, it’s DSL. Not diesel as in the fuel.”

Customer: “You’re not a very good company, then. You’re saying I can’t get diesel from you, but then telling me I can’t get unleaded, either.”

Me: “Sir, if you just call your phone company, I am sure they can help you.”

Customer: “Oh, okay, then.”

(The customer starts mashing numbers on the keypad without hanging up. I stay on the line.)

Me: “Sir?”

Customer: “I just talked to [My Company] and they said you have diesel lines.”

Me: “Sir you never hung up the phone. This is still [My Name] from [My Company].”

Customer: “Holy s***! You work for both places?”

This story is part of our Customers Caught Lying roundup!

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