The Academy Awards are done and dusted. There were plenty of worthy winners, some surprises and some upsets. Some of my predictions were right, a couple others not so much. But where would be the fun if it wasn’t like that? Anyway, that’s not why we’re here now. Following something that I do every year for myself, I am selecting my own winners from my own set of nominees, making this public for the first time. Sure, you can call me pretentious and full of it, but my obsession for film and for such categorizations runs already a pretty long time, relatively speaking of course. I’ll explain the rules now. Basically, only films that I’ve watched are eligible (because duh!); I usually work with six nominees per category, but this time I am going with ten in the main categories in order to award a first, second and third place; for the more technical categories I’m sticking with six; also, I try to keep a balance between mainstream american productions and more international entries. So, without further ado, this is how an award show decided entirely on my judgement would look like:

First, some “genre” categories (five nominees, only one winner):

Best Action Film:

Baby Driver

Dunkirk

Logan

Thor: Ragnarok

Wonder Woman

Winner: Logan

Best Comedy Film:

The Disaster Artist

Lady Bird

I, Tonya

The Square

Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri

Winner: The Square

Best Horror Film:

Get Out

mother!

It: Chapter One

It Comes at Night

Raw

Winner: Get Out

Best Sci Fi/Fantasy Film:

Blade Runner 2049

Okja

The Shape of Water

Thelma

War for the Planet of the Apes

Winner: The Shape of Water

Best Animated Feature: (saw sadly just the three)

Coco

The LEGO Batman Movie

Loving Vincent

Winner: Coco

Best Foreign Language Film:

Loveless – Russia

In the Fade – Germany

Raw – France/Belgium

The Square – Sweden

Thelma – Norway

Winner: The Square (Sweden)

And now, the more “technical” categories (three possible winners):

Best Score:

Blade Runner 2049

Loving Vincent

The Killing of a Sacred Deer

Phantom Thread

The Shape of Water

Star Wars: The Last Jedi

Winners: 3. Star Wars: The Last Jedi; 2. The Shape of Water; 1. Phantom Thread

Best Make Up:

The Beguiled

Darkest Hour

I, Tonya

Logan

mother!

Okja

Winners: 3. mother!; 2. I, Tonya; 1. Darkest Hour

Best Costume Design:

The Beguiled

I, Tonya

Mudbound

Phantom Thread

Okja

The Shape of Water

Winners: 3. Mudbound; 2. The Beguiled; 1. Phantom Thread

Best Production Design:

The Beguiled

Blade Runner 2049

Dunkirk

Phantom Thread

The Square

The Shape of Water

Winners: 3. The Square; 2. Blade Runner 2049; 1. The Shape of Water

Best Visual Effects:

Blade Runner 2049

Dunkirk

Guardians of the Galaxy 2

Star Wars: The Last Jedi

Thor: Ragnarok

War for the Planet of the Apes

Winners: 3. Star Wars: The Last Jedi; 2. Blade Runner 2049; 1. War for the Planet of the Apes

Best Sound:

Baby Driver

Blade Runner 2049

Dunkirk

Star Wars: The Last Jedi

War for the Planet of the Apes

Wonder Woman

Winners: 3. Blade Runner 2049; 2. Dunkirk; 1. Baby Driver

Best Editing:

Baby Driver

Blade Runner 2049

Dunkirk

I, Tonya

The Shape of Water

Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri

Winners: 3. Blade Runner 2049; 2. Baby Driver; 1. Dunkirk

Best Cinematography:

Blade Runner 2049

Dunkirk

Logan

Loveless

Mudbound

The Shape of Water

Winners: 3. The Shape of Water; 2. Dunkirk; 1. Blade Runner 2049

And finally, for our last nine categories (ten nominees, three possible winners):

Best Original Screenplay:

Coco

A Fantastic Woman

Get Out

A Ghost Story

I, Tonya

Phantom Thread

The Shape of Water

The Square

Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri

Wind River

Winners: 3. Phantom Thread; 2. Get Out; 1. The Square

Best Adapted Screenplay:

Blade Runner 2049

Call Me by Your Name

The Disaster Artist

Lady Macbeth

The LEGO Batman Movie

Logan

It: Chapter One

Molly’s Game

Mudbound

War for the Planet of the Apes

Winners: 3. The Disaster Artist; 2. Lady Macbeth; 1. Logan

Best Supporting Actor:

Javier Bardem – mother!

Mark Hamill – Star Wars: The Last Jedi

Woody Harrelson – War for the Planet of the Apes

Barry Keoghan – The Killing of a Sacred Deer

Rob Morgan – Mudbound

Sam Rockwell – Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri

Bill Skasgaard – It: Chapter One

Patrick Stewart – Logan

Michael Stuhlbarg – Call Me by Your Name

Jean Louis Trintigant – Happy End

Winners: 3. Sam Rockwell; 2. Patrick Stewart; 1. Jean Louis Trintigant

Best Supporting Actress:

Mary J. Blige – Mudbound

Kirsten Dunst – The Beguiled

Allison Janney – I, Tonya

Catherine Keener – Get Out

Lesley Manville – Phantom Thread

Rooney Mara – A Ghost Story

Laurie Metcalf – Lady Bird

Elizabeth Moss – The Square

Michelle Pfeiffer – mother!

Tilda Swinton – Okja

Winners: 3. Mary J. Blige; 2. Laurie Metcalf; 1. Allison Janney

Best Actor:

Timotheé Chalamet – Call Me by Your Name

Daniel Day Lewis – Phantom Thread

James Franco – The Disaster Artist

Hugh Jackman – Logan

Daniel Kaluyaa – Get Out

Jamses McAvoy – Split Gary Oldman – Darkest Hour

Robert Pattison – Good Time

Jeremy Renner – Wind River

Andy Serkis – War for the Planet of the Apes

Winners: 3. Timotheé Chalamet; 2. Gary Oldman; 1. Daniel Day Lewis

Best Actress:

Sally Hawkins – The Shape of Water

Isabelle Huppert – Happy End

Nicole Kidman – The Killing of a Sacred Deer

Diane Kruger – In the Fade

Jennifer Lawrence – mother!

Frances McDormand – Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri

Florence Pugh – Lady Macbeth

Margot Robbie – I, Tonya

Saoirse Ronan – Lady Bird

Daniela Vega – A Fantastic Woman

Winners: 3. Margot Robbie; 2. Diane Kruger; 1. Frances McDormand

Best Acting Ensemble:

Call Me by Your Name

Get Out

Happy End

I, Tonya

The Killing of a Sacred Deer

Logan

Mudbound

Phantom Thread

The Shape of Water

Three Billsboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri

Winners: 3. Happy End; 2. Phantom Thread; 1. Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Misouri

Best Director:

Paul Thomas Anderson – Phantom Thread

Darren Aronofsky – mother!

Michael Haneke – Happy End

Yorgos Lanthimos – The Killing of a Sacred Deer

James Mangold – Logan

Martin McDonagh – Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri

Ruben Östlund – The Square

Guillermo del Toro – The Shape of Water

Denis Villeneuve – Blade Runner 2049

Andrey Zvyagintsev – Loveless

Winners: 3. Yorgos Lanthimos; 2. Ruben Östlund; 1. Paul Thomas Anderson

Best Picture:

Get Out

In the Fade

The Killing of a Sacred Deer

Logan

Loveless

mother!

Phantom Thread

The Shape of Water

The Square

Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri

3. Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Misouri; 2. Phantom Thread; 1. The Square

So that’s that, that’s how you pretentiously give random awards to movies because you’re a smart ass and think you know better than the academy. Congratulations to all the winners, this is a much higher honour than winning that old Oscar. For those of you who like statistics (taking only into account first place rankings), both The Square and Phantom Thread won four awards each, while Three Billboards, Logan and The Shape of Water won two a piece.

Just wanted to put that out there. Tell me what you think: are these awards better deserving than the Oscars? or I’m just completely out of my mind? Which film would you choose for Best Picture, Director, etc.? Thanks for reading and until next time!