If you listen closely, somewhere in the distance, you can hear a social media manager weeping.

Just a couple of months ago, hundreds of Melbourne taxi drivers lined the steps outside Victorian State Parliament demanding action against Uber. Deliberately worsening the public transport strike that was already inconveniencing the city, cabbies held angry signs and chanted “shut down UberX”. Though the popular ride-sharing app is already technically illegal, their efforts were intended to put pressure of the regulator to crack down on the practice and either create an even playing field by hitting the ride-sharing app with similar taxes, or get the cars off the streets for good.

It’s hard to say how effective this was. On the one hand, it did push the state government into action. Just a couple of weeks after the protest the Victorian Premier Daniel Andrews announced he would be looking into the issue; announcing potential legislative changes to address passenger safety and insurance matters. But the cars are still out there. In fact, after reforms to existing legislation in the ACT, they’ve just been able to legally enter the market in Canberra.

Now, the Victorian Taxi Association has tried a different tact: make cabs better. In an attempt to take on Uber at its own game and lure customers away from the popular app, the Melbourne taxi industry has this week announced a new initiative called Your Taxis. Addressing customer’s regular complaints with the service, it involves changes like new booking technology, real-time mapping and pre-trip estimates as well as a PR campaign offering 12 months of free taxis for one lucky customer who shares a brief story about the service.

In theory, these stories should be about helpful drivers saving people’s pets, helping the elderly, and returning people’s belongings — a timely reminder that the 17,000 employees of the taxi industry are in fact mostly kind and experienced people who do their job well (and would prefer to hold on to it). But in reality, when a campaign like this is launched via social media something else happens. And, for whatever reason, this is a lesson social media managers are apparently never going to learn.

Meet #YourTaxis:

@skincontact Thanks Chris. Will take this on board ✌?️ — yourtaxis (@yourtaxis) November 9, 2015

While these first few tweets sent in reply to the initial call-out last night were met with cringeworthy response from the VTA, eventually the deluge became too much. Within a few hours, the hashtag had started trending nationally and was attracting stories which ranged from frustratingly common to outright shocking.

.@yourtaxis Many times a taxi slowed down as I hailed it, asked where I wanted to go, then sped off because the fare was too low #YourTaxis — Sophie Benjamin (@sophbenj) November 9, 2015

#YourTaxis That time I had to punch my way out of a cab because the driver was trying to sexually assault me. — Amy Gray (@_AmyGray_) November 9, 2015

#YourTaxis Then there was the time an overworked, sleep-deprived cabbie plowed cab into a car with my daughter inside, putting her in hosp. — Amy Gray (@_AmyGray_) November 9, 2015

#YourTaxis The one time I complained to the ombudsman about a cabbie who threatened to kill me, I never heard back. — Amy Gray (@_AmyGray_) November 9, 2015

Cab rear ended another car, kept meter running while exchanging details for 20 mins, demanded I pay total amount, I hurt my neck #YourTaxis — Hantai (@supsuphannah) November 9, 2015

That time when the driver changed his mind and decided he “didn’t want to go that far” so left me in an unknown suburb at 3am #YourTaxis — David (@Daveo_au) November 9, 2015

Every time I get in a Melbourne taxi I have to tell the driver to stop texting and talking on phone. Your job is to drive safely #yourtaxis — Brian Ward (@indolentdandy) November 9, 2015

Once, just once, the engine warning light wasn't on. #YourTaxis — Stewart Smith (@stewartsmith) November 9, 2015

Cab driver watching a video on his tablet while driving #YourTaxis pic.twitter.com/U9QMjPldvQ — Rich (@richokinetic) November 9, 2015

This morning the new Your Taxis Twitter account has been in full damage control mode trying to reply to all these messages with personalised responses. Doing slightly better than an awkward peace sign emoji, they’ve made statements like “short fare refusal is unacceptable” and urged people to contact both the taxi companies and the regulators to rectify any future incidents.

“We are working hard to try and improve the service,” they wrote. “#YourTaxis [is] proving a great opportunity for us to talk about our service with customers.”

And while that may be true — acknowledging problems are always going to be the first steps to solving them — this is what it looks like at the moment to prospective customers:

and here is what happened to #YourTaxis Social Media strategy… pic.twitter.com/2eePENll3K — Wolf Cocklin (@wolfcat) November 10, 2015

And this is what it looks like to Uber:

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Feature image via Savio Sebastian/Flickr Creative Commons.