So one day, while I was trying to come up with some clever pun about Byakuren, I wondered if there was anything I could do with "namusan." The first thing that came to mind was "Sam I am. Namusan."



Things kept going from there, pretty much.



I've done five stories so far and may do more. If I feel like it.





Namusan and Man



Man:

"I am Man.

Man I am."



Byakuren:

"Human, I am, but a kind woman.

I do not like that hateful Man."



Man:

"Would you kill a youkai, ma'am?"



Byakuren:

"I would not kill one, hateful Man.

I care too much to say I can."



Man:

"Would you like to here or there?"



Byakuren:

"I would not like to here or there.

I would not dare to anywhere.

I will not kill a youkai, Man.

I would not kill one, namusan."



Man:

"Would you kill one with this hat?

Would you kill one with a rat?"



Byakuren:

"I do not care what hats they wear,

Nazrin means naught to this affair.

I will not kill a youkai, Man.

I would not kill one, namusan."



Man:

"Would you kill one if it talks?

Would you kill one that's a fox?"



Byakuren:

"To talk shows how much they are we,

And, fox or not, that's plain to see.

I will not kill a youkai, Man.

I would not kill one, namusan."



Man:

"Would you? Could you? For your life?

Kill one! Kill one! With a knife!"



Byakuren:

"I show mercy, knives I eschew;

This same compassion, I'd show to you.

I will not kill a youkai, Man.

I would not kill one, namusan."



Man:

"You will not kill one, so you say...

So you won't see the light of day!"



Byakuren:

"I will not kill a youkai still;

As eons pass, I never will.

They'll let me free, I know they can;

Meanwhilst I pray that you change, Man."





The Cat With the Hat



There was not any incident, and in boredom we lay,

So Marisa came by, and we drank tea all day.

But then something went SQUEAK! Oh, did that makes us freak!

A rat darted out, and we nearly did shriek!

Then we looked! And we saw her pounce on the rat!

We looked! And we saw her! The Cat With the Hat!



And she said to us, ?Why do you sit there like that?

We could play some danmaku,? said the Cat With the Hat.

"I'm a brand new shikigami," said the Cat With the Hat.

"I can use some fresh spellcards, and we'll have fun, at that."

But Marisa and I did not know what to say.

We were thinking this cat should just shoo, go away.



"What's that look on your faces? Am I boring to you?

In that case, here's a friend: Chen, of course, but Ran, too!"

Then a Fox With Some Locks came and span from the sky,

And of note, when she landed, she let out a sigh.

"I know not why you sought to bug them some more,

But you do have a point that today is a bore."



"Now together, we'll play," said the Cat With the Hat.

"And with Ran here, it may be I'll make you go splat!"

But the battle was halted before it began,

For a portal was opened before Chen and Ran.



"So I nap for one second, and lo, what is that?

You are crushing poor Nazrin, you silly, fat cat.

You shall do no danmaku, you shall not do it here.

Reimu's shrine would be ruined again, so I fear.

If you say "but no incidents," I say you lie;

The troubles you make in-between qualify."



"For a master of borders," the magician quipped,

"You sure do have issues keeping them whipped."

And the gap youkai glared: "Do shut up for my pleasure,

Else I rip out your tongue and your spare for good measure."



So the Cat With the Hat and the Fox With Some Locks

Went away in the gap with the Girl With the Cap.

And Marisa remarked, "Geez, all that from a mouse.

Well, I'm still pretty bored. I'mma blow up their house."





How Satori Stole Shinto



In Gensokyo, they had followed Shinto an age...

But Satori beneath them could not hold her rage!

Satori despised it! The whole Shinto shebang!

And it wasn't just 'cause she cared not for yin-yangs.

No, she hated the cycle, the Hakurei way,

That led human and youkai to fight every day!

Yet they seemed to enjoy it! And yet she knew not why!

But one day, she decided she'd kiss it goodbye!



So she sat in her bunk, and she thunk, and she thunk,

'Til she got an idea so awful it stunk!

"What a glorious plan!" And to her work she ran,

And she made the most maidenly garb in Japan!

So adorned in the outfit, all frilly and sleeved,

She was sure even Marisa would be deceived!



"All I need is a turtle" - but Satori was stumped,

For that was a hurdle not easily jumped.

Would Satori give up? No, there's story to go!

"You can walk on all fours, can't you now, Utsuho?!"



So she rode to the shrines, Moriya, Hakurei,

And she wrecked them as good at she could before day.

She broke into all houses, from shack to chateau,

And she pilfered from them every ruffle and bow.



But just as she went to the mountaintop peak,

She heard an emerger from the underground speak.

"Satori? And Okuu? Hey, what's with your clothes?

You're leaving me out of some fun, I suppose?"

And she was glad Koishi closed her third eye,

For it made it quite easy to tell her this lie:

"Oh, sister, you've caught me like such a buffoon.

We were just doing cosplay, we'll be back home soon."



Koishi was convinced (for her sister WAS weird),

So Satori could finish with no more to fear.

With adornments in tow (with, of course, names that rhymed),

Slowly but surely the mountain she climbed.

It was finally dawn by the time she was done;

She had view of the land of the old rising sun.



"Oh-hoh to Gensokyo!" she lazily yawned.

"They're finding out now that their Shinto is gone!

They're just waking up! I know just what they'll feel!

Their hearts will be saddened, they'll get down and kneel!

And both human and youkai will lamentably SQUEAL!

Those are hearts," grinned Satori, "that I simply must hear!"

So she paused, and made sure her third eye could see clear.



And she did feel their thoughts coming over the land.

And they came to expand, they turned ever so grand...

But the thoughts were not sad! Why, they were of good cheer!

It couldn't be so! They must all have had BEER!

She glared at Gensokyo! Satori's eyes popped!

And she saw such a sight that it made her heart drop!



Every human and youkai, magician and fairy,

They continued their roles, they continued them merry!

She HADN'T stopped Shinto's recurring! IT WENT!

In Gensokyo's ways, she had not made a dent!

And Satori, left feeling awestruck and aghast,

Stood puzzling and puzzling: "How can it still last?

It goes without gohei?! It goes without bows?!

It goes without ribbons, parasols, crows?!"



She puzzled and puzzled 'til she'd near lost her mind.

Then Satori thought something to which she'd been blind.

"Maybe Shinto," she thought, "doesn't come from a shrine.

Maybe Shinto, perhaps... isn't theirs, hers, or mine!"

And what happened then? In Gensokyo they say

That Satori's third eye opened three winks that day.



So she hurried to bring back all that which she'd stole,

And made sure that all youkai were left joyous souls.

And once done, Satori went back under to pray...

But Sanae awoke, and there was hell to pay.





Tenshi the Angel



In the sky far above, in a heavenly realm,

Tenshi the Angel thought herself at the helm.

A nice little place. It was joyous and fun.

And so high in the sky, it of course got much sun.

The Celestials had all Celestials could ask.

And in this utopia, they eternally basked.



Tenshi, though, was not so; she found all of it dull.

It was perfectly boring her out of her skull.

"I'm better," said Tenshi, "than all who I know.

But the problem, you see, is my proving it's so.

With this Keystone, I can cause some earthquakes, it's true,

But to seem as if that's all I've got shall not do.

The people below take me far, far too lightly.

I shall tower above, just as I deserve rightly!

If I could do that, oh, what might I'd command!

Both the queen of the heavens and all of the land!"



So Tenshi the Angel went down to the ground,

And she bellowed her order, a deafening sound.

She forced all of the fairies and spirits and crows

To build her a throne that up to heaven rose.

Since they had no material, their selves formed a stack.

Tenshi climbed to the top one and sat on her back.



"I can see," Tenshi cried, "all the land from this seat!

Every human and youkai whom I could soundly beat!

I'm the queen of Gensokyo, and this, they all know,

For I am so high, and they are so low!"



And all through the day, she chuckled with glee:

"Not a girl in Gensokyo can come above me!"

And indeed it was true - at least, they did not try.

But down from the bottom, there came a low sigh.

"What's that?" yelled the angel, snapped out of her daze.

And a turtle named Genji turned upward his gaze.

At the bottom he sat, and he said, "Tenshi, Queen,

I should think that by now, what you seek, you have seen."



For a moment, Queen Tenshi was taken aback.

"Shut your mouth! You will stay at the base of my stack!

What nerve of a turtle to be questioning me!

He belongs at the bottom - a dimwit is he!

What I seek," she proclaimed, "is to reach to the skies!

Then both heaven and earth will be plain to my eyes!

You can surely bring more! Make my throne higher still!

I rule all that exists, and all that ever will!"



"I see nothing to you that proves power at all,

But a Keystone that would, in fact, make your throne fall.

And your throne, it means naught, it is easily beat:

One must simply do this." Genji moved his old feet.

With this minuscule act, the throne shook and it swayed,

And the Queen's loudest shouts could not stop the cascade.

As the stack, it unstacked, Tenshi fell on her crown,

And was once again Chiko, queen of the ground.





And To Think That I Saw It On Hell's Former Streets



When Suika leaves the underground, she always bids farewell,

And adds, "If you see something cool, next time I'm here, do tell."

But when I do just what I'm told, she scoffs, "You make my day!"

She thinks it's all a fairy tale, I've had too much sake.

But things are really happening here - well, when the time is right.

These WERE the former streets of hell, where oni roamed all night.



And one night I was pacing before Suika came,

And I thought to myself, oh, now this is a shame!

There is nothing a-happening, not but one little thing,

But a fairy a-fluttering with its tiny wings.



I can't tell Suika that, she'll just think I'm a bore!

I know for a fact she'll expect something more!

But I can tell a lie, I can do that quite well:

At the least, I can say it was Cirno in hell.



Though what business had she to be wandering here?

Well, of course, hell was cold around this time of year.

And the reason for that? Well, if you didn't know,

Cirno's best of friends Letty was calling up snow.

Yes, an incident came! Hell with snowballs and sleet!

And to think that I saw that on hell's former streets!



Now that's odd, to think Letty would do such a thing.

Why would she go to hell to bring winter in spring?

Well, she said she was sent here by Yuyuko, see,

And it came to relate to the Ayakashi.

She wanted it cold here - and this is a hoot -

So there'd be plenty water to give to its roots!



Well, of course such an incident couldn't last long.

Reimu set out to settle for good this great wrong.

And on top of all that - and I say this with pride -

It was Mima herself who fought at Reimu's side!

But it was not so simple! It was almost a war!

With a polar bear youkai, a naga, and more!



And where did they come from? Well, I've got news for you!

That Yuyuko brought youkai from Former Hell Two!

Did you know that existed? No, neither did I!

And believe it or not, it is found in the sky!

It would seem the Celestials and they always fought,

So she offered - Yuyuko - to borrow the lot.



Such an intricate plot, but that's not quite the end!

There was yet one more person behind this, my friend.

Orchestrating this plot with the thinnest of silk

Was Yukari Yakumo and all of her ilk.

And as for HER intentions, who can possibly tell?

I just saw what I did on these old streets of hell!



What a story I've spun! Suika'll sure get a rise!

But I looked up and gasped - it was before my eyes!

Yes, old Letty was here and was bringing a blizzard,

And Reimu fought onward with Mima the wizard!

The pair struggled on against Yuyu's resolve,

And I knew the Yakumo just MUST be involved!

Then I heard Suika coming! And I shouted, "Hey, sis!

You won't trust it from me - you have GOTTA see THIS!"