Pic via reader Dan

I don’t know many things.

I know that the Eagles are 3-1. I know that Chris Collinsworth has incredibly narrow shoulders. And I know that DiNics changing bread providers is something that frightens me deep within my core.

But what I don’t know is who enhanced this drawing of a drunk Phanatic at Bullies Pub in Xfinity Live! this weekend with the outline of a Nats fan giving him a blow job (I’m assuming someone added this and that it wasn’t the original creation).

Of course, I’m 12 and think this is hilarious. But why, exactly, is the Phanatic’s dangle orange? I’d assume it would have to be green, no? Hell, I always kind of figured it was one of those birthday noisemakers, like his tongue.

Never change, this city.