If the Big Three want Uncle Sam to bail them out, they might have to put up with a nanny looking over their shoulders as they try to turn things around.

The latest word out of Washington is Congress and the White House are inclined to throw Detroit a $15 billion lifeline, but the plan includes the appointment of a federal "car czar." The autocrat — who, depending upon the final plan, would act independently or as the head of a board of financial experts — would have broad authority to reshape the automakers. Detroit is so desperate for cash that it's willing to let Washington put someone in the driver's seat if it means they'll stick around past the holidays.

Several reports put Kenneth Feinberg, the attorney who doled out $7 billion as special master of the Sept. 11 Victim's Compensation Fund, at the top of the list of candidates. He's made a career out of mediating complex disputes, and although he drew some criticism for his handling of the 9/11 fund, he also won support for his adept management of what was a difficult task.

If he doesn't want the job, we have some suggestions of our own.

Paul Volker — the former Federal Reserve chariman under Presidents Carter and Reagan is another leading candidate for the gig. He's as calming as Valium to the folks on Wall Street. If he can whip stagflation, he should have no trouble cleaning up Detroit.

Mitt Romney — a long shot, but qualified. He's a skilled businessman who rescued the 2002 Winter Olympics from a fiscal morass; he's a former governor with loads of experience dealing with big bureaucracies; and he's familiar with the auto industry because his father led American Motors. Romney suggested in a New York Times op-ed that Detroit be allowed to go bankrupt, so you know he'll play hardball.

Carlos Ghosn — While Detroit was racing headlong toward insolvency, Ghosn was turning Renault Nissan around. He slashed costs and brought the company back to profitability faster than anyone expected. We love him because he's committed to electric vehicles. Ghosn has made it clear that the entire industry faces an uncertain future and only innovation can save it. Sure, he leads a competing company, but he might be up for a new challenge.

Lee Iacocca — The man, the myth and probably the top choice among the automakers. Iacocca was the guy who turned Chrysler around the last time it needed a bailout. Iacocca knows the industry, but he might be a little too biased (he said the heads of

General Motors and Chrysler should keep their jobs) to get the nod from Washington.

Steve Jobs — He saved Apple, and he's got a knack for innovation, design and branding — three things Detroit's been short on for years.

Al Gore — Hear us out ... The inconvenient-truth teller says he doesn't want a government job, but seeing him babysit Detroit would be more karmic than OJ's recent conviction. Aside from having a vested interest in seeing Detroit build cleaner cars, Gore's got experience making them do it. The Clinton administration invested more than $1 billion in the Partnership For a New Generation of Vehicles, which brought the Big Three together with government research labs to develop cars that could deliver up to

80 mpg. Together they developed concept cars that delivered 70 mpg or better, but the Bush administration killed the program in 2001 — at the request of the Big Three. Gore would almost certainly bring the program back if he got the nod. You can imagine the cold shrieks of fear in Michigan if his appointment were announced.

Photo by Flickr user mharrsch.