Record Store Day 2015: Every Punk & Metal Release Ranked Share:

The time is nigh for celebration, fellow odious record-collecting nerds! Record Store Day is this Saturday! Here is the definitive ranking for every punk, metal, and hardcore record being released.

Every year there is a giant shit pile of exclusive records set to be released. Most of them are unbearably lame but a few are worth the price of getting up early and nursing a hangover in a line with a bunch of other misanthropes. I looked over the full list of Record Store Day releases and ranked most of the punk and metal (and some other stuff) records in order of Rad to Not Rad. Warning: Opinions below.

1.

Metallica – No Life Til Leather | Blackened

EASILY the coolest release this year. You can get Metallica’s classic demo tape (featuring the OG lineup with Mustaine on ax and Ron McGovney slapping the bass) on cassette! In this rare instance, releasing an album on cassette makes sense as an aesthetic choice rather than an ironic move by some slapdick band of morons*.

2.

V/A: The Wrestling Album & PILEDRIVER: The Wrestling Album 2 | Legacy

FUCK AND YES. In 1985 a butt-ton of wrestlers on the WWF roster put out The Wrestling Album, a collection of mostly wrestling theme songs from the likes of Captain Lou Albano and Roddy Piper. In 1987, we got a sequel with PILEDRIVER: The Wrestling Album 2. It’s more of the same, but if you’re a sucker for kitschy wrestling nostalgia, that’s not a bad thing (there’s even a song by Vince McMahon!). This 2 LP collection has both albums and I must have it.

3.

GWAR – America Must be Destroyed | Metal Blade

Gwar’s 3rd LP is getting the 2×12″ vinyl reissue treatment INCLUDING pop-up art! Cool story time: This record was inspired by obscenity charges Dave Brockie faced for flashing his giant prosthetic dong cuttlefish on stage in North Carolina. Gimme.

4.

MDC – Smoke Signals | Beer City Skateboards

For their 1986 LP Smoke Signals, hardcore punks MDC turned down the hardcore and turned up the prog. From the bizarre 70s-style rock of “South Africa is Free” to the Little Richard quasi-cover “Tofutti” and the country-fried vegetarian anthem “Country Squawk”, this is a really, really weird album. But it’s fun and I want it and you should buy it for me.

5.

Brand New – Deja Entendu | Triple Crown Records

Not even a little metal and just BARELY punk, I don’t care; I must have this 2 x 12″ vinyl reissue of Deja Entendu. I totally won’t drink bottom shelf whiskey and weep for my misspent youth while listening to this. Definitely not.

6.

At the Gates – Gardens of Grief | Century Media

The debut EP by Swedeath legends At the Gates on 12″ 180-gram vinyl. What’s not to like?

7.

Poison Idea – Just to Get Away/Kick Out the Jams 7″ | TKO Records

This 7″ picture disc features Poison Idea’s “Just to Get Away” from the unfuckwithable Feel the Darkness and a rad cover of “Kick Out the Jams” by the MC5. If any or all of those words excite you, pick this one up.

8.

Hawkwind – Hawkwind | Rhino

SPACE ROCKIN’. Rhino is reissuing Hawkwind’s 1970 debut LP. This is a pre-Lemmy album, so Motörhead completists will have to wait for the reissue of Doremi Faso Latido. Regardless, Hawkwind is still a jammy little album so don’t sleep on this one.

9.

Carcass – Choice Cuts | Century Media

This 2004 compilation features songs from each Carcass work (except Surgical Steel, adoy). Century Media is reissuing the thing on 2 x 12″ vinyl which is a cool but also kind of an excessive and unnecessary thing to do. But I suppose that’s the point of every Record Store Day release.

10.

Steve Reich – Music for 18 Musicians | Nonesuch

This isn’t even a little metal but it rules. Buy it for me, please.

11.

Leatherface – Razor Blades & Aspirin 1990-1993 | Fire Records

This 3 LP set includes the first 3 albums from underground UK punks Leatherface. Remastered, full of bonus material, and limited to only 500 copies, this one is gonna go fast. Bonus fact: Leatherface is sweet as hell. If you like tasty guitars, listen to Mush, which will be included in this collection.

12.

Nightsatan – Nightsatan and the Loops of Doom | Death Waltz/Mondo

This is a weird one. Nightsatan and the Loops of Doom is the soundtrack to a low budget 80s movie that never existed. If cheesy, dark synth pop is your thing (c’mon, it’s fun), check this one out. Sample the Bandcamp to get a taste of the lazer-y pleasures that await you:

13.

Venom – From the Very Depths | Spinefarm

The latest LP from heavy metal forefathers is available on 2×12″ vinyl. Opening single “Grinding Teeth” goes REALLY hard, so I don’t give a shit about all the bickering you nerds do about this band.

14.

Path of Resistance – Who Dares Wins | Victory Records

Shortly after the dudes from Earth Crisis put out the seminal hardcore album Destroy the Machines, they got into a serious van accident. Dennis Merrick couldn’t play drums for several months due to his injuries, so the other Earth Crisis guys recorded Who Dares Wins under the moniker Path of Resistance. It’s OK.

15.

Clutch – From Beale Street to Oblivion | Weathermaker Music

The 2007 album was the 8th full-length from Maryland’s own #hardrock stalwarts. Available on 2 x 12″ purple vinyl for extra hard rockiness.

16.

DRI – Live at CBGB’s 1984 | Beer City Skateboards

Now remastered and available on vinyl for the first time ever, you can listen to the CBGB’s show from DRI’s “Violent Pacification” tour. Or, you can watch the entire performance on YouTube! The future is fucking awesome. I’m a big DRI fan but this is the domain of hardcore hardcore-era DRI fans only.

17.

Mastodon – Atlanta | Warner Bros

If you’re a real-deal big Mastodon boy, you can pick up this 12″ picture disc of the song “Atlanta”, released earlier this year on the Adult Swim Single Series.

18.

Everytime I Die – Salem 7″ | Epitaph

This 4 track EP features a cover of Nirvana‘s “Tourettes” so this is probs a must-have for hardcore ETiD fans.

19.

Publicist UK – Original Demo Recordings 7″ | Static Tension Recordings

The band’s debut single out on vinyl. Check out MoshOff’s review of it here.

20.

SWANS – 12″ EP | Young God

A reissue of the first EP Swans ever released. Included in this list because our Finnish readers will want it.

21.

Jungle Rot – Terror Regime | Victory Records

Their 2013 LP issued on vinyl. If you dig Terror Regime and if your wildest dream is to hear it on vinyl, here’s your chance to dance.

22.

Slayer – When the Stillness Comes 7″ | Nuclear Blast

This fuckin’ Saturday, the Kerry Krew is releasing a brand fuckin’ new SLAAAAAAYER song so get up fuckin’ early and pick up this 7″ so you can fuckin’ hear it! Or wait until 9:15 AM and someone will have this on the the Pirate Bay.

23.

The Dead Milkmen – Big Lizard in my Backyard | Asbestos

Pick up a vinyl reissue of the 1985 debut LP from these jokey Pennsylvania punks that for some reason either didn’t know about or didn’t believe in guitar distortion. I thought I wanted this but then I just listened to “Bitchin’ Camaro” on Spotify once and I’m good.

24.

Electric Wizard – Time to Die | Spinefarm

Last year’s full-length from doomlords Electric Wizard on 2 x 12″ vinyl. The few tracks I’ve heard lead me to believe this album is a great cure for insomnia so I just might have to cop this one.

25.

Stone Sour – Meanwhile in Burbank… | Atlantic/Roadrunner

That dude from Slipknot‘s other band covers Alice in Chains, Judas Priest, Kiss, Metallica, and Black Sabbath. Theoretically it could be good?

26.

Blackberry Smoke – Wood, Wire & Roses | Concord

I don’t know anything about Blackberry Smoke but Earache seems to like them so they must be metal, right?

27.

Foo Fighters – Songs from the Laundry Room | RCA

Dave Grohl poops out another Thing for Gen Xers to fawn all over. I don’t know what’s on this chunk of wax and I don’t care.

28.

Mark Kozelek – What’s Next to the Moon? | Badman Recording Co.

This is an album the Sun Kil Moon dude released in 2001. It consists of “drastically rearranged acoustic covers of Bon Scott-era AC/DC songs.” It could be the best collection of compositions this century but I’m still not gonna listen to it.

29.

Rise Against – Eco-Terrorist in Me 7″ | Interscope

Rise Against are back with *loud farting noises*

30.

V/A: Sons of Anarchy – Songs of Anarchy Vol. 2 & 3–Seasons 5 and 6 | Friday Music

SDMF GETCHAPULL. I’m a motherfuckn #BERZERKER and i dont ware these colors2 look #cool. I wear this fake biker gang cut bcuz I am a #TUFF #SOB.

/purchases a 1500cc Harley as a first bike like a REAL MAN.

//dies

31.

The Devil Wears Prada – South of the City 7″ | Atlantic/Roadrunner

I honestly had no idea The Devil Wears Prada was still a band. I assume this new song features a heartfelt clean-sung chorus that doesn’t fit the rest of the song.

32.

Atreyu – So Others May Live 7″ | Spinefarm

“7 inch vinyl featuring the exclusive physical release of the band’s first new song in 6 Years!” If you must, you can listen to it here, but it’s terrible so you shouldn’t.

33.

Islander – Violence & Destruction | Victory Records

For a second I thought the dude from No Clean Singing started a band. He did not, and I’m a dummy. Anyway, if you like embarrassing nü-metal revivalism go ahead and pick this coaster up.

34.

In This Moment – Sex Metal Barbie 7″ | Atlantic

Are there enough vinyl aficionados out there that are ALSO date rape enthusiasts to warrant this release?

35.

311 – Grifter/Who’s Got The Herb? 7″ | Legacy

I got your herb right here:

Record Store Day is Saturday April 18th. Check out the full list of releases here.

*My slapdick band has an album available on cassette here.

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