Every aspect of your upbringing was stacked to make you an asshole.

The movies told you to objectify and harass women, your politicians taught you that trivialising assault is chill, and your role-models showed you that being paid more than women who do the same work as you is obz totes coolz bro.

Men’s magazines taught you how to manipulate the world to suck your dick and women’s magazines taught you there are 55 Creative Ways To Suck Your Dick Really, Really Well. Heck, even ads for ice-cream and mango juice seem, often, to revolve around your dick being sucked. Beautiful thing, patriarchy.



Your dad probably demonstrated to you that you don’t need to lift a finger around the house. Your doting mother insisted that her Esteemed Royal Highness Sri Sri Raja Beta™ is entitled to every known delight, centrally a sexy and accomplished wife who will take over the doting and finger-lifting duties upon ma’s own tragic departure, RIP.