“My husband died and I think this is worse,” someone told Maddie Corman in the summer of 2015. People said all sorts of things, by way of consolation, after her husband was arrested for downloading and sharing child sex abuse images. “There was no right thing to say to me,” Corman says. “To say, ‘You’re going to be OK.’ Who knew I was going to be OK? Who knew if the kids were going to be OK?”

Some friends offered confessions from their marriages: “My husband has had a few hookers”, or “I hate having sex with my husband”, or “You should see what’s on my laptop!” Some people observed that her husband was, at least, still alive. But perhaps he might kill himself?

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