A transcript of an audio recording made by Doctor Jacoby. The case of the recording is labeled “Johnny Horne, last coherent dive, 1981”.

Jacoby:

“Johnny! Are you ready to be hypnotized? Sure you are! Now look at this stone I’m holding up for you, Johnny.”

[A rustling sound.]

Jacoby:

“Here, Johnny. This way. Good. Okay. Now listen to my voice. You are standing on the shore of a calm, blue lake. There are radiant clouds drifting above you. There’s a fishing rod. You’re about to catch a big fish. A big, and beautiful fish. It takes patience, and you are patient. Golden sunlight glitters on the soft, dark waves rolling towards you. You start counting them, wondering which one hides the big, beautiful fish. One. [Jacoby coughs softly.] One. [Jacoby coughs again.] One. Two. Three. Four. Five. Six. Seven. Eight. Nine. [Jacoby coughs again.] Nine. Ten.”

Johnny:

“One. One. Nine. Yes. In the water.”

Jacoby:

“That’s right. Can you hear me, Johnny?”

Johnny:

“Yes.”

Jacoby:

“You are at the top of the stairs, Johnny. Right before the accident happens. Now walk back in time [Jacoby coughs softly] with me, Johnny. Where are you now?”

Johnny:

“Down by the water. At the lake.”

Jacoby:

“That’s right Johnny. But we’re not fishing now. We can go fishing later, we can go again. Where are you, if not at [Jacoby coughs softly] the lake?”

Johnny:

“No. I am at the lake. I have a cup in my hand. A cup I found. Somebody is in the water. Underwater. Drowning? I can only see her hand, reaching up and out, as if from elsewhere. I’m afraid. She’s too far in. I can’t reach her. I throw the cup into the water, and look for a smaller bough to break off. I find one. It’s already broken off. It’s already broken off. It’s shaped like numbers put on top of one another. [Jacoby coughs. Johnny continues.] One. One. Nine.”

Jacoby:

“What do you do with the bough, Johnny?”

Johnny:

“There’s a mark on it. A carving. A bird, like. It’s a very straight bough. A sword. I wade into the water, looking for the hand. She’s nowhere. I thrust the bough into the water. Sweeping. She’s not there any more. I start to cry. Suddenly my sword gets stopped, grabbed. It doesn’t move. Someone’s gripping, pulling it. I’m trying to help her, pulling back, backing out of the water. The bough slips from my hand. She raises it, underwater. [Jacoby coughs softly. Johnny continues.] Then it sinks. I run back into the house, crying for help, shouting. I can’t see anyone there. I run up the stairs. Then I hear those steps. Wet. Slow. A woman says [Johnny is imitating an older, raspy female voice] ‘Not yet, young knight’, and throws the bough onto the floor downstairs. [Johnny is imitating the voice again] ‘Not until he meets the girl in the water. Give it to him only then. Point him back to me from the fire.’”

Jacoby:

“Who is she, Johnny?”

Johnny:

“I don’t know. I don’t know her. I can’t see her. I’m afraid. I don’t want to see her. I don’t want to see her! I don’t! And Audrey–”

Jacoby:

“It’s all right, Johnny. You don’t have to. What do you do then?”

Johnny:

“The bough, the sword, they find it when I’m already wandering the underwater kingdom. I’m a warrior there. Do we have knights here? Indian knights? Indian warriors? Amen! Amen! They cut it up! The bough! The sword! They use it for, for, no, for a doll house! For, for, for its walls! Walls! Get out! Wood! Get out! Woods! [Johnny is imitating the female voice again, with a sudden calm, whispering] ‘Cup. Sword. Spade! No! Noone. One. One!’”

[A quick gurgle. Johnny?]

Jacoby:

“Nine? [Jacoby coughs.] Johnny, are you all right? Johnny? Johnny, come back to the–”

[The recording cuts off here.]

EOF

About this story

I wrote the above weird little fan fiction piece for The Fan Dossier, a Twin Peaks fan fiction writing contest organized by one of the most well-known TP fan sites (that even the official creators recognize), Welcome to Twin Peaks.

The contest began on December 8, 2017, and the finalists — selected by Mark Frost, a co-author of Twin Peaks — were finally announced on April 6, 2018.

It was a rather strong competition, and my piece hasn’t made it into the top three. However, Pieter Dom, the man behind welcometotwinpeaks.com and the contest started publishing all the entries (beginning with the winners, of course) — and my story was scheduled to appear in the Fan Fiction Friday series too. Unfortunately, Pieter had to suspend the publication of the series indefinitely, for various reasons.

Following his recommendation and with his approval, I’ve decided to finally publish my story here, on Medium — and what date could’ve been more appropriate for this than Twin Peaks Day, that is, February 24, the day Agent Cooper arrived in Twin Peaks? :)