Rub Of the Green

Phoenix Rising/Felix The Rising Phoenix

Natsuki kicked down the classroom door that shook the classroom. She had two pitcher jugs of Guinness in her hands, which of course are filled to the brim, to the point where it some of it spilled to the floor. The black liquid left wet puddles around the stumbling, pink haired teen's feet. "Happy St. Patrickkkks day, bissshes!" Instead of the usual school uniform where it's just brown and white, she was wearing all greens, even the little ribbons in her hair.

Yuri glanced at her, and gave an approving nod before looking over at Monika from the side. The Club President could only look at the display, paled face and with abject horror. The poor girl was extremely traumatised. That in which would explain why her ginger hair suddenly had a white tint on some streaks of hair, if only momentarily. Yuri tried to be polite as possible while withholding her laughter, only giving out a quiet giggle.

"Oh. My. God, Natsuki!" Sayori sprinted towards her beloved friend and hugged her tightly, of course still careful to not spill even more of the Irish drink than what was already on the floor. "That is amazing!" The short brown haired girl gushed. "Where did you find that stuff?"

"Oh, this shhheeyt?" Natsuki sucked inside of her mouth and played around with it and her tongue. She made squishy noises as she played with her mouth. "I gots it all from an Irish pub just nearby here, The Irish aree just so f-f-friend- They're just nice y'know?" MC was engrossed in reading the most recent edition of the Parfait Girls manga. He just for a moment glanced up at the scene, all before looking back down at the book with immense amount of disinterest in what was happening.

"The nearest Irish pub is in the town centre, which is thirty miles away." Monika shot a disapproving glare at the first year teen, tutting at the display. "Besides, you're not supposed to bring all those drinks to school."

"And whe not? Is free country."

"I'll tell you why not. This is about the club and if the teachers see you, we're all doomed here, Natsuki! You don't know how badly I- I mean. We all need this club.

"That may be true." Yuri injected before Monika could go into a long winded rant. "It's a free country, but it's clear you're not of drinking age."

"See?! What did I tell you?!" Monika gestured at the rational purple haired intellect of the group, as an attempt to make the most impulsive pink haired tsundere see sense.

Natsuki shook her head in a dopey grin, as she rolled her eyes. "Oh, silly, Mon-Monika, I didn't get thesssse two, lovely jugs for you!" She poked the President's chest and carried them over to the table, slamming both plastic jugs down. "They're both for me, fam! But I am willing to share, you're wel-come." She raised both fists into the air in celebration.

Sayori jumped at her from behind and pulled the pink drunk into a warm hug. "Can I have some too?"

"Sheeit yeah you can, Sari. You, you are one of my best friends y'know that?" Sayori was lifting the jug to her lips, but stopped as soon as she heard Natsuki's kind words. Tears threatened to spill out from her eyes as she placed the jug down and turned to the club's resident bitch, and gave a warm, sweet smile.

"R-Really?"

"Fuck yeah! Y-You're the best, man. You were living with depression for like forever! And y'know what you fucking said to that sheet?"

Sayori's face scrunched up in confusion. "Um.. Not today old friend?"

"Nah!" Natuski poked her friend on the chest. "You said 'I'm not gonna let some shitty. Fucking. Goddamm. Rainclouds. ruin my fucking life!' You inspire me, dude." In each adjective Natsuki forced out spit from her mouth, fortunately none of the spit hit the Vice President's face she kept on poking for empathises. She merely just let her friend rock back and forth.

There was no threat of tears anymore. The sweet cinnamon bun couldn't hold it back any longer. Her soft laughter reached the class room before she pulled Natsuki into another tight, bone crushing hug. Yuri could only wince for a moment as she witnessed this. "Okay, ow. That does look like it hurt."

Sayori rubbed her face into her chest as she continued crying.

"Oh, c'mon, man. Y-You're gonna make me, cry. You know how I hate crying." The strange acting tsundere stroked the back of her crying friend. Her own tears started appear on her own, as if on reflex there was a sniff from her.

"Aw, that's so sweet!" Yuri gushed, as she pulled out her phone and took a picture of the adorable moment. It was obvious Natsuki would no doubt kill her when she sobers up. Yuri knew that Natsuki would probably kill her, but this was definitely worth it.

MC was still reading his manga and continued to not care about the conversation that was transpiring around him.

"Fuck you, Yuri! No, no, no, no. S-Sorry. I didn't mean that. Y-You're my best friend, Yuri. You're my best friend, my best fucking friend in the world, man."

At that moment, Monika threw her arms in the air, groaning at the conversation, which she did admit internally, was sweet. But they were ultimately evading something the subject of this conversation. "Okay, okay. Stop before you all make it worse!"

"How? Natsuki's being nice to me." Sayori grabbed Natsuki by the arm, which the pink drunkard choked rather hard on the Guinness that she was trying to get a large gulp off. Her lungs burned a little as she tried to inhale as much oxygen her body called for. The childhood friend dragged her around the table and pulled Monika and Yuri into a tight group hug. The sides of Monika's mouth twitched upwards a bit before pulling away from the hug, much to Sayori's disappointment.

"I don't care if she's nice right now, Sayori. I would prefer Natsuki sober. We won't get into trouble that way."

"Aww, cm'oooon, Monika. I'm fine, I bought these drinkie poos and we could all get drunk together! I mean, today esh the day where getting trashed is totally okay!" She slammed her defiant fist onto the table. "Hiccup! Awe, Goddamn it! I fucckin' hate hiccups!"

Yuri grinned at the sight of Natsuki, there's so much blackmail material she could use later if she wanted to. "Aw, Natsuki. You're so cute right now!"

"I keep fuckin' tellin' ye, I'm not cute! Hic!"

"How old are you again, Natsuki?" Monika bored a look into Natsuki's hiccupping form, hands on her hips in a disapproving mother scowl.

"Hic, old enough t', hic, drink somewhere. That's all I care about. Hic! Fuck!"

"You're eighteen, and yet you're drinking like a middle aged man."

"Hey, maybe they have good s-tastes, you don't know! Hic."

"Actually, Monika has a point. The legal drinking age in Japan is twenty. So technically, you're breaking the law right now."

It was only then, to Monika's continuing horror, that she noticed Sayori has started to drink one of the Guinness jugs. She quickly apprehended it from her hands and carried it over to a high shelf where Sayori can't reach.

"Heeey! I was enjoying that!"

"But you can't have it!"

Sayori pouted at that, pushing two of her index fingers together in. Her brow furrowed at The Club President. "Hey, the voices in my head are being mean again, so what's a little fun to distract myself from them?"

"Hey-hic- Yeah! Sayori's the right idea. I knew yurr the smartes'one here! An' Monika, nobody likesa buzz kill."

"Yuri's right. The drinking age in Japan is twenty!" Monika could swear she could pull her hair out right now.

Yuri closed her eyes in a blissful smug smile. No matter how many times she was right, it never got old for her. "See, told you, Natsuki."

"Dude, wh-why are you being succch a dick to me? Oh look, the hiccups staphed. Besides, it's a good thing I'mma not a Japaneseh shccool girl."

"Don't listen to them, Natsuki." The bubbly mascot of the club grabbed at Natsuki's head firmly and pulled it into a protective hug to her chest. "Shh, girl. I won't let them hurt you."

Natsuki gave the cinnamon bun a deadpanned look, "You have isssueh, you knoe that? Hic! FUCK!"

"Oh yeah, you're not Japanese? Then what are you?"

Natsuki blushed a bright crimson, rubbing her head into one of her best friend's soft and warm chest. She would never admit that she liked it, she'll probably carry that thought to her death bed before ever admitting that well, it felt nice for her. She looked up at the stern faced purple haired girl sheepishly and replied "I'm Merrican, Obvioushe"

"Wait, so let me get this straight. I want to at least explain to the school board, PROPERLY, as to why it is the club was holding alcohol and has to be disbanded. Because after all, we will be caught-!

"We're finnne, Monika. Nobody's gunna cash us doin' this stuff." The first year gave a dismissive hand, that is which to say was closer to a dismissive arm. That arm pushed her body forward, nearly causing her body to fall forwards. She would have easily fell flat on her face if Sayori didn't catch her and whispered soft, sweet words in her ear, as if the whole club couldn't have any more sexual overtones. Again, MC was ignoring all of this.

"As I was saying… The only reason why you're drinking right now, and you think it's fine, is because you think you're American?

"Not juss me, Mon-Mon. All of us! We're all American! Hic!" Natsuki let out an irritated groan as soon as the hiccup escaped her lips.

"Please never call me Mon-Mon ever again."

"How about Momika?" Natsuki giggled herself into an almost deranged laughter fit. "Tha's it! Imma call you Momika from now on!"

"Oh God no, that's worse!"

The pink haired girl finally broke away from Sayori's grasp and gave her an apologetic look before pulling the Guinness jug into her grasp and starts chugging it down. Yuri grabbed her hand that was holding the handle and pulled it down slowly. The intellectual of the group only gave a deadpanned look. "Okay, if we are American, why are we in a Japanese school?"

"Well, to be fare, tish, most screws look t' same." Natsuki wiped her mouth clean and gave an extensive burp unloading whatever swallowed air wanted to escape from her mouth.

It was so strong, it was apparent even MC noticed it. He looked up at her, nodded approvingly. He nodded with a smile, impressed at the burp. "Nice."

"MC, tell her!" Monika gestured at the pink haired girl and pleaded with her eyes at him.

"Tell her what?" He shrugged as he gave a blank stare. Nothing in the world could make him interested in any of this. Monika at this point, was completely red, from head to toe. She could swear blind that her nose could start leaking blood at any moment in an earth shattering aneurysm.

"How about I compose a list? That she shouldn't be drinking? That's she being immature? That she's going to put this club into JEAPORDY?!" She swivelled over to Natsuki, pointing an accusatory finger at her. "How many drinks did you have anyway?!"

Natsuki's lips parted only slightly, before they closed again. She rubbed her chin in deep contemplation and scanned her memory as to how many pints of alcohol she had already. She counted up with her fingers. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, she stopped, and scratched at her chin. She shook her head. No, seven wasn't right. She counted down all away to four, then back up again to six, then back down to two. Satisfied with her answer she beamed out a proud smirk and held up two fingers at Monika. Unfortunately, it was the rude 'V' sign.

"It was two, Momika!"

"Try that name as many times as you like, Natsuki. It's not going to stick."

"I don't know, I kind of like the nickname of Momika. It sounds cute."

Shut up, MC!"

"Yeah, nobody asked for your opinion!"

"Good. Because I really couldn't care less about any of this if I tried." MC then procced to bow his head down and return his full attention to the manga below him, he licked both of his fingers and turned the page while Sayori hid behind him. She whimpered as Natsuki and Monika started to go forehead to forehead. With a quick glance, the childhood friend prayed to whatever existed that Yuri would intervene. But alas, she's having popcorn. The rational headed woman offered the popcorn to Sayori in which she quickly grabbed a fistful and stuffed it in her mouth. If nothing else, there is food, Sayori thought to herself.

"God, you are so stubborn!" The two echoed in increasing amounts of tension, both in their faces and fists.

"Why can't you see what you're doing is damaging the club?!"

"Lewk, Mooom, there ish nothin' wrong with a little fun!"

"There is when it's clear you're completely drunk!"

"Bish, you haven't even seen me drunk! I'll put my fellow 'Mericans to shame!"

"You're not American! Your name isn't Natalie! Sayori isn't called Sarah, I'm not called Monica with a 'C' and Yuri isn't… Actually what would be the American name for you Yuri?"

Yuri put her hand to her chin, and looked upwards towards the roof in deep thought. "Would it matter, what nationality we are? If Natsuki says she's American, then who are we to stop her?"

"Yesh! If we're born on A-American soil, then wesh are American!"

Natsuki's legs at this point started to become really stringy, Sayori quickly burst forward and let the pink haired drunk lean against her and carefully carried her to the table. She pulled out a chair and carefully sat her down.

"And you, Monika." Yuri turned her attention towards the Club President. "Yelling at a drunk person isn't going to help. You know that."

"I-er… She…" She emitted a resigned sigh, as she walked over to the table and pulled up a chair of her own. "You're right, Yuri. I shouldn't have lost my temper there. But how do we explain all of this without getting the club banned?"

MC closed the manga book, and brought his head up to meet Monika's emerald eyes. He took her hand into his and gently stroked it. "Well, there's always the option of, you know, kicking her out, or deleting her."

The rest of the girls but Natsuki were shocked, all but the poor tsundere. The first year bolted to the corner of the room and regurgitated violently into a bin. She groaned in pain and rubbed her head when she finally slumped to the floor, all the while Sayori rubbed her back in comfort.

"Yeah, that's not happening."

"But I thought you loved this club, Monika."

"I do! But not at the cost of my friends, I'm not doing anything like that again."

Yuri gave the Club President a warm, proud smile, and offered her some more popcorn. Monika nodded and took five pieces into her hand and consumed them one by one. She looked over at the lonely looking Guinness pitcher, and chuckled. "You know what, Natsuki? You win."

"I win what now? Owie."

Monika rose from her chair and walked into the cupboard, a few moments later she returned to the table with pint glasses, she placed them before Yuri MC, and placed one down for herself. "It's okay, Sayori, you two can come over."

Sayori beamed at the group, helping Natsuki to her feet which she pushed herself away, she turned to see Sayori's pained expression. She stared at her for a long while with a stern look. "Listen, Sayori. Yew may be one of my bestfriendes. Doesn't mean I n-need help from you all da time, okay? I can handle myself." The scowl faded, and patted her on the back. "But… thanks a-anyway." Natsuki stumbled over to the table while, Yuri fetched the other pitcher still on top of the tall shelf.

Sayori kept a close distance at the staggering Natsuki, just to ensure she doesn't fall again. She giggled when the group once again gathered round the table. "Yeah! Friendship drinks!" Monika's and Natsuki's eyes met one another, as the ginger haired teen poured a glass and pushed it over to the little chef.

Yuri's and Sayori's drinks were poured after. Sayori was the first to speak, "So, gals, what should be our toast. Hail to the Irish? To never liking Snakes? Oh! I got it, to coming back after being deleted!" Sayori glupped down her drink a couple times before Natsuki covered the rim with her hand, and gave her a shake of the head. She mouthed out the word no before she carefully placed Sayori's drink back down.

Yuri perked up, with a big beaming smile. "I know. How about to our Japanese heritage?"

"We're not Japanese, Yuri. I toldcha be-before."

"Actually, since we're AI, technically we have no nationality at all. Not even MC here has a nationality." Monika stated, as she softly rubbed MC's back. There was still no interest from the densest human in the multiverse. "So in a way, we could be whatever nationally we want."

"Well, t' legal drinking age in I-I… eye-er-land, eh whatev's close enough. The legal age there is eighteen, and wadda ya no? We're all eighteen!" Natsuki raised her glass to the celling, grinning ear to ear. Monika could only debate in her head whether or not it's sad that it's the happiest that she's ever seen the first year. "To being feckin' Irish!"

Monika pursed her lips in thought before with a smile suggested, "How about… to friendship?"

"And to Momika being a cute nickname!" Sayori injetected.

Monika chuckled and ruffled Sayori's head which got a pout in response. "Yeah, okay. That'll do." With a rousing cheer all of the girls clinked their drinks enthusiastically, while MC just shrugged and pushed his chair back.

He started to drink down his Guinness in a nonchalant, aloof attitude. This joyous moment, however, was briefly halted when there was a rigorous banging at the door. "Natsuki, what is it I hear bringing alcohol to school grounds?! You're going to get detention for a long while, young lady! I always knew you would be trouble at this school! Just wait until the Headmaster hears about all this!" Natsuki could only slide down her chair, her whole body burning bright red in shame and embarrassment.

There was a moment when a lightbulb seemed to flicker and a dark shadow was cast around Monika as she rose to her feet. "For the record, Natsuki. You never brought trouble here. You're one of my best friends and nobody should talk to you like that."

As the teacher ranted, Monika merely rolled her eyes. She approached the classroom door and locked it. In a moment of Dutch courage, she downed her drink in an impressive display and yelled out, "WE'RE HAVING A CLUB MEETING, NATSUKI'S MY FRIEND, SO, THEREFORE, FUCK OFF!" The rest of the club could only look on in a mixture of horror and awe. Monika's hair and uniform looked dishevelled. But she quickly turned round and smiled at the group with a cute pose before she returned to the group.

"Oh wow, Monika, thanksa bunch."

"Oh it's nothing, really. I'm probably going to get detention too, but it's worth it."

"Wouldn't you both be expelled?" Yuri asked in a concerned tone.

"I suppose yeah, if they could find the evidence. It would be such a shame if someone were to… delete the evidence." Monika gave a knowing grin to the purple haired introvert, emitting an innocent yet paradoxically intimidating giggle.

"Wow, Mo-Monika, yew woulda make a great momma!"

"I know Natsuki."

"I lied 'bout t' drinks by t' way, I had sex drinks, not two."

"I know, Natsuki, I know you had six drinks."

End.