Back in the summer term, we had the chance to speak to a Mechatronics student about their experience of not liking their program, and the impact that had on their mental well-being.

Q: You mentioned that you have seen a psychologist. Do you want to talk about how that process went?



It took about a week for me to get my first appointment. At that point I had already talked to some of my friends about their experiences as some of my friends are open about taking medication for clinical depression. I personally haven’t been on any medication like that though. The experience of getting an appointment was hard, and I wanted to ask my friends help, like to phone in for me to book the appointment, but in the end, they were busy. It was a busy time for everyone, so I had to book it myself, and it took maybe a week or so for me to be seen.



All of these issues stemmed from me not wanting to stay in Mechatronics — I wanted to switch to another program. I went in person to Health Services and said I wanted to get help. I wasn’t really sure what was going on though. They gave me a form to fill out and asked me to mark how urgent my situation was. I don’t remember how long I waited there, but I don’t remember it being all that long. Then I remember finally getting help, and that helped my psyche — it wasn’t that hard really; there’s not much bureaucracy at Health Services. The first time seeing my psychologist, I thought it’d be like the movies — people lying on the couch and being asked deep questions about many different parts of my life. We talked mostly about me, and to start with he asked standard questions, but towards the end it felt like he really tried to get to know me; how I deal with my experiences, how do I do things, whether I use substances like alcohol and drugs. Psychologists need a lot of information to make a judgement about someone. He definitely didn’t immediately diagnose me, but that’s almost impossible to do.



Since then, I’ve been back to see him every month or so. I’ve been seeing him for over a year now, it’s just a regular thing I do. It’s important that I’m consistent because when I’m feeling better about myself, he helps me to maintain a more positive view.



Q: Have your perceptions of counselling changed while seeing your psychologist?



The first time I went, I expected really big, hard, and life-changing questions that ended with me breaking down crying. That wasn’t what happened at all though. After the first time, I had more realistic expectations and going to go see the psychologist was just another part of my routine rather than some radical or immediately life changing experience. Expressing myself to him was the hardest part, but someone else told me that’s pretty typical. I’d say that seeing a psychologist might not change your life in an hour, but it takes time — everything takes time.



Q: Have you told your friends about your experiences?



I don’t really mention mental health issues to my friends or my class. My closer friends, I do tell a bit more though. Nowadays, I will tell some people that I’ve been seeing a psychologist. I’m not ashamed of it or anything, but it doesn’t really affect my day to day life so I don’t need to talk about it.



Q: You mentioned before that a coworker spurred your interest in seeing a psychologist?



Yeah. A while previously I had a conversation with a coworker who said that he thought it would be a good idea for him to get professional help. Then, later on when I was considering seeing a psychologist, I was encouraged by his affirmation that it was normal to seek help, even for someone who seemed totally in control of their life.



Q: Would you say there was any particular reason that you went to see a psychologist?



When I saw my psychologist, he said that I was showing symptoms of depression, but he was also concerned about potential bipolarity. It didn’t turn out to be bipolar disorder though. Some people are more likely to be depressed than others; to some degree it does depend on genetics, and a lot of people in my family have dealt with depression. It also can be triggered by stressful situations, and Waterloo Engineering certainly has a lot of those.

A lot of people joke that Waterloo causes mental disorders like depression and anxiety. They’re not that far off base though, sometimes people do go through panic attacks, anxiety, and depression caused at least in part by school. You really don’t have to have something deeply wrong with you for that to happen. I know plenty of people in my class who have big problems; I’d like to be able to advise them to see a psychologist.



Another service that helped me out is MATES. They’re a student volunteer run service that provides peer mental health support. They undergo several days of training before they begin meeting with students. It’s totally confidential and works well if you just want to talk to someone. Friends are good for that too, but sometimes you don’t want to tell your friends about all your problems. MATES is nice also because they do have walk-in hours where you don’t need to book an appointment which helps people get seen sooner.



Q: You said earlier that a lot of the issues stem from not wanting to stay in your program. What would you say is the main reason for switching?



I would say it’s mostly just because of my interests. My dad said he never saw me as an engineer and that probably played a part as well. The piece that probably influenced me to make a change is my low threshold for stress though.

There are lots of people who are unhappy in engineering programs but don’t switch. I would say that’s often just because it’s easier and less of a hassle to stay, rather than to do the work required to switch into another program. I’ve talked to graduates before who mentioned that they’d rather have been in another program. I don’t hate mechatronics — it just has a lot of content that I don’t really want to do.

Q: Any general advice for people who are considering getting help?



I’d say that seeking help is always important. It doesn’t have to be a professional — even seeing student volunteers through MATES is a good step. If it doesn’t work out, try something else whether that is a different counsellor, a different service, or something else entirely. Also remember that if it doesn’t go well, don’t give up, keep trying; everything takes time.

Going through depression sucks as do a lot of other mental health issues suck. That said, without it, I wouldn’t be where I currently am in my career. For instance, I had a lot of difficulty finding jobs one term because I just stopped applying to postings. At some point, I got desperate and I managed to land interviews by looking outside for a job. After all that it ended up being a really, really cool job. It’s funny how the world works sometimes, and even when things aren’t generally going well good things can happen.



Q: To end things off on a lighter note, why don’t you talk about what makes you happy? What are you looking forwards to the most?

I’ve always been future oriented; in the future, things will be better. I’ve always believed that, even at my lowest times. I grew up in a good home with no real childhood problems or anything, it was just stressful at times. From those experiences I was told to believe that there will be better days, and I really do believe that.



Things don’t always go well; life is pretty stressful. Honestly, though in the real world, you will face problems. So as you deal with more and more troublesome situations, you become happy by figuring out how to deal with them better.

I like to look for the small things in life. I went for a walk on campus last month, because I had the time to do that. Giving yourself time to do things you don’t normally do is fun.

If you have a story to share and are interested in being featured on the blog, reach out to one of the Mental Health Awareness directors, or email us at engsocmha@gmail.com