For better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part. But don’t you dare ask for a sandwich.

Recently Fox News host Andrea Tantaros said making a man a sandwich is an act of kindness, and it does not bring women back to the 1950’s. Her opinion was dismissed as “sexist rubbish.”

Is it?

Tantaros is a successful woman, making her man sandwiches does not seem to have interfered with her career.

And even if she was a housewife there should be nothing outrageous about her statement.

Making a sandwich is never going to keep a woman from achieving her life goals, regardless of what they are.

In my culture food has a central role in human relations, and this adversity for domesticity has always been a mystery to me.

So I asked Google.

As it turns out, feminists hate sandwiches.

But not as much as they hate this woman, Stephanie Smith, who made her boyfriend 300 sandwiches and then married him.

People got angry, whined on their blogs, but could not explain why Smith’s projects offends them so much.

Why the sandwich?

I always wondered why of all food feminists hate sandwiches.

There are more time consuming things to make in the kitchen.

I think it is because sandwiches are not the exception.

Sandwiches are simple to prepare and can easily become a daily ritual in a relationship.

The outrage is not about one sandwich, but about the 300 a girlfriend will make during her relationship, the 3000 a wife will make during her marriage.

The problem with this way of thinking is not so much that it ignores suitcases boyfriends will lift and pickle jars they will open, but that it disregards the importance of daily acts of love.

It is incredibly sad to see how this generation thinks pleasing others is a form of oppression.

Why we cook



We can all agree that the food we eat has an impact in our lives, and so does the food we cook.

A great Italian writer, Elsa Morante, used to say that the only true love phrase is “have you eaten?”

I am a 23 year old with a job and an apartment, and my mom still asks me if I eat. She still cooks for me whenever I visit her.

Would anyone say that she is being submissive, or that I am being controlling?

I don’t think so. People would think she loves me, and likes to take care of me.

Then why is it so hard to think a woman might be cooking for her man because she loves him?

Not because she is scared he will leave her if she is not a “super woman” (does it take a super woman to make a sandwich?)

Not because he is manipulating her into doing it.

Yes, men can make their own sandwiches. So can I. Does it matter?

Women in the kitchen – some history



In the 1950’s “Quick ’n’ Easy” recipes, TV dinners and instant noodles started to become popular in America, because women were doing more with their lives than just cooking.

Though feminists view these trends as the beginning of a rebellion against gender roles, the damage they caused to food culture is beyond repair.

When asked about their favorite food, today most American will answer with a list of brands and fast food chains.

According to Joan Gussow, professor of nutrition and education at Columbia University Teachers College, girls stopped cooking because “they were told that smart women do not cook.”

Irena Chalmers, head of the International Association of Culinary Professionals in Louisville said we are raising “the first cooking-illiterate generation.”

You can look at this infographic to better understand how the slow death of homemade food has been affecting America.

So what?

Cooking is the ultimate love gesture.

Not only because it means investing our time on someone else, but because it allows us to have a direct impact on the lifestyle and well being of those we cook for.

What millennials do not seem to understand is that a healthy relationship with food is incredibly valuable in a successful marriage.

How is a couple supposed to raise children if they only cook for themselves, and insist on spending as little time as possible in the kitchen?

How will they take care of those children when they refuse to take care of each other?



Sharing a life with someone means more than sleeping in the same bed or buying a washing machine together.

It means finding a role in the relationship, understanding how to improve each other’s life.

So if you love a man, quit bitching and make him that fucking sandwich.

If you don’t, leave him.