mgawalangmagawa Junior Guild Member



Join Date: 2nd Nov, 2016 Posts: 31

Re: Crimbopalooza Story Contest 2018 - Open for Submissions



Final



Poll:



Here are all the entries of the contest:



A. DemiGum



Spoiler: The Overwatch fandom sucks - their ships make no sense whatsoever, and the plot of their video game is a joke at best, and a plot-hole driven, herb-smoked monstrosity that makes no attempts at consistency or cohesive storytelling. The fandom's treatment of female characters is gross at best, and breathtakingly hideous at worst. The finger-pointing and yelling of the non-support players on those who play support is horrible and how you get 'battle medics' who plan on allowing all of you idiots to die repeatedly, because they're already going to get abuse heaped on them by ungrateful jerks anyways. Suck it.



B. John Keel



Spoiler: “Let me tell you about Homestuck.” These are words that everyone online has feared since 2010. If you meet someone at a convention who says that to you, don’t listen - walk quickly in the other direction. If you see someone with horns and grey body paint, or wearing a mostly-white T-shirt and a wig, do the same. Homestuck fans are some of the worst and most numerous there are; their ships are not limited to normal human romance, but also three kinds of alien “romance”; and they would love nothing more than to explain all of this to you.



C. zedleeftw



Spoiler: Dear Nintendo fandom, you suck. With your unreal and unreasonable expectations of Super smash bros, the last reveal has caused so much anger and disharmony in the community. It doesn't help that Nintendo is becoming more scummy and adding amiibo/ spirit gacha and making super smash bros super grindy. The thing is, there are going to be so many people of the fandom who enjoy this scummyness and this is just sad. Is Nintendo going to become like EA? I sincerely hope not. But the fandom does not exactly inspire hope. The future of gaming looks bleak with this community.



D. ThePig



Spoiler: My fandom is a kind person. He is ugly but awesome in his heart. He looks fierce but is soft in the heart. He look Ignorant, but he actually has a Doctor degree. However, one day, everything changed. He went out of his house, slamming the door, kicking everything out of his way, instead of usually moving them carefully. He attracted all his neighbor's attention. If he was his normal self, he would have apologized. After some discussion with my friends, we concluded that he might have some kind of illness. To our surprise, he passed away the next day.



E. breakingamber



Spoiler: The KOL community is a satirical uncaring piece of carp. Its members are nice to each other, but the rules in chat are extremely strict and the very game makes fun of just about everything under the sun. Sometimes, the community even gives out prizes for making fun of other communities that are just as good as theirs, if not better. Possibly the worst thing about the KOL community is that it is nearly impossible to leave. The game is practically a drug and appeals to basically all audiences. You'll be stuck playing KOL until you die, living, ascending, repeating.



F. Huggawugga



Spoiler: Chicken wings should be untouchable, but the fandom has ruined them for me. It's gotten so bad that my spouse wears gloves when we eat them. Anecdotally, we had a wing that was semi-boneless in a shared bowl one time. She logged into a fandom forum and discussed it FOR HOURS. Our marriage is on the rocks thanks to one weird shaped chicken meatball without a femur. What gives, Wingnutz? If it tastes good, we should be able to eat it without contention. Unless you're ready to visit every farm and sauce factory, you need to give it up, please!



G. Heatdoom



Spoiler: *Among all the unique and individual fandoms that could potentially suck I feel that none suck more than those fandoms that have vampires in them. Through long and painstaking research I have come to this conclusion because of one simple fact, vampires suck blood. Any fandom with vampires in them would suck because the main characters in the book would literally suck. Therefore beyond all the fandoms that figuratively suck, vampire fandoms both literally and figuratively suck. If you still don't believe my objective claims I only have a few more words in response to your disbelief. The Twilight Series.*



H. LeftMeDead



Spoiler: I don't know why fandom sucks I don't know why fandom sucks I don't know why fandom sucks I don't know why fandom sucks I don't know why fandom sucks I don't know why fandom sucks I don't know why fandom sucks I don't know why fandom sucks I don't know why fandom sucks I don't know why fandom sucks I don't know why fandom sucks I don't know why fandom sucks I don't know why fandom sucks I don't know why fandom sucks I don't know why fandom sucks I don't know why fandom sucks but it just suck.



I. Jugajo



Spoiler: So I was angry, playing my game, and my resource teacher told me to run on the treadmill for 20 minutes, I said no so he threatened to turn off my chrome book, he turned it off and later gave me a bowl of candy, I held the bowl hostage, later I said I went to get my lunch and he though I was going to do the 20 minutes, He said I betrayed him, everyone laughed and told him I said I dident do the treadmill I got my lunch, doot doot doot doot doot doot doot doot doot



J. Monkey McDermott



Spoiler: The Legend of the Five Rings community sucks. The game was a lot of fun but the community was the worst of CCG players. It was basically people who were good at magic but wanted to play a game drunk, or people who THOUGHT they were good at magic samurai cards and blamed game balance when they lost. One faction actually accused the company of cheating in their own contest to keep their faction from winning a story prize. To repeat, they accused the designers of cheating in their own contest, just to prevent their faction from getting story time



K. XXXTentacion037



Spoiler: The Fortnite Fandom sucks. It has gone too far. We now have adult Fortnite content, 12-year old cos-players, V-Bucks scams, adamant "best player in the game" figures being more toxic than nerve gas, and don’t even bring up the "Fortnite Films" you see on YouTube. This fandom has gone too far, useless skins being bought like it’s a necessity, popularity revolving around building skill, number of wins, and whether or not you have the newest skin. This fandom is effects peoples' day to day life and in some cases even mental health. Simple story and mysteries? What is this Scooby-doo?



L. Lucelle Ball



Spoiler: RainFurrest sucks and thankfully it is no more as of 2015. As with all things bad it started out small but as more people attended, it was mismanaged to the point where nobody would host them because of the tens of thousands of dollars of property damage a handful would cause coupled with your usual bouts of violence (regular and sexual) and people leaving diapers in the carpark. We can only hope that what plagued Rainfurrest does not spread to other Furry conventions and that hot tubs and people's dignity will remain safe and unclogged. Oh and stay classy furries.



M. Trar



Spoiler: Listen here, son. That Superman 64 fandom is bad, bad news. Y'might think "what's the harm, it's just a bad game to laugh at", but I assure you I thought the same thing, 'n I lost my whole fortune to it. Bad games can suck a certain kinda person in, 'til they're playin' that crap for real, collecting all kinds 'o me-mo-ra-bilia and rare junk related to it. An' these gamers, they're reeeeal obsessed, 'n if'n one thinks he got a raw deal on some auction website, he's gonna come after you like a hellhound. It ain't worth it, son.



N. Trixter13



Spoiler: The X Legion sucks. It was a hangout club at school. I’ve always been a solitary person and I vehemently dislike being vulnerable to other people, but I joined anyways. We go to anime conventions together, meet each other’s families, and basically promised a lifetime membership. Turns out, after three years of membership, it was religious differences that made the club ban me for life. It crushed me, and I promised never to be in a club ever since. It was more of a cult than a community and I'm beyond embarrassed to admit that I fell victim to it.



O. deadleeplatapus



Spoiler: One of the hardest things about being an inventor is coming up with ideas and then making them a reality. I was able to imagine and create a better version of a common household item. It took a couple of years to break down what has been available in the past, and then try to determine where I could improve and make the different parts more efficient. Then came the welding, electronics, and overall design finishing touches. The item was beautiful, and the name for the product came to me right away. "Fandom Vacuums." Now to think of a catchphrase.



P. Lesbian_Syphilitic_Spanker



Spoiler: I don't think I've ever had the displeasure of witnessing anything as disgusting as the art pieces from that disturbing fandom known as r/handholding. Seriously, that's just disturbing how sickeningly sweet everything there is. My teeth hurt just from thinking about it. Whatever happened to the good old debauchery, buxom, revelry and to other stuff that shan't be mentioned here because this is a nice family contest? r/handholding is a cesspit of incorruptible purity, not for any weathered internet dweller to set their eyes upon lest they become forever lost to its wholesome vanilla charms. Pray for those lost souls.



Q. heroic Kol player



Spoiler: I have got a fandom that sucks, the MINECRAFT fandom. The people in there are just simply horrible, I used to have a friend who would non-stop go on about minecraft, it would be minecraft this or minecraft that. The game itself is perfectly fine but the people! That is only one example. Another example are the unhealthy battles between the minecraft community and practically all other similar games like terraria and such. The community is made up of noisy 5 year olds who simply ruin the fandom who keep arguing because "one has to be better than the other".



R. Prusias



Spoiler: 'Your fandom is trash'

He said relishing my disgust.

Its writers are rash

and its fans lack trust.'

I shrugged down my anger and gave him a sigh

As I prepared for the greatest ass-beating the world could spy.

'My fandom is shit?'

'We'll look at your fandom lickety split.'

'Well My Little Pony...um' I interrupted with a gaffe.

'Your obsession with ponies,

is whack, we can agree.'

'It must be a real malady,

for it's just beastiality.'

'Uh.. no it's not that.'

He said abash.

I reached over and gave him a pat.

'It's okay, your fandom is trash.'





S. Smushinello



Spoiler: The grossest part of The Office is the community that sprung up around the character Cousin Mose. These are grown adults who dress up in faux Amish gear and just lurk. When you see a "Moseamaniac" at the end of a darkened hallway, it's startling! They'll usually chop-run away, which is supposed to be cute but is actually creepy. Everyone in my building is jumpy because a whole beet farm of Moseamaniacs has gained control of the heating duct network. The landlord says they're harmless, but for all I know there was a spinoff webseries called "Mose, Go A Murderin'".



T. DudeCats



Spoiler: Hey guys, it's me, back again with another video about how I pretend I'm just like you guys but at the same time I like to flex on my fans with all the rich garbage that I buy. See this thin piece of string for a shirt? Only $7,337! I can't wait see my girlfriend's reaction just to shove it in your guys' faces that I can afford this garbage. Oh wait, make sure to like this video, subscribe to my channel, turn on post notifications, and write a comment below requesting what financially irresponsible action I should do next!



U. JXQZ



Spoiler: The Sonic the Hedgehog fandom sucks. I find it strange how much the Sonic universe has taken off, but not from actual fans, just a legion of idiots who write fan-fiction about their awful independent characters that are built around what the artist considers their personality, uploaded to deviantArt. Just look up "[your name] the Hedgehog." Not to mention the fact that all that happens to the character is that they somehow have their stomach or some other part inflated. Gee, how sexy. I know more about stupid fanmade sonic crap than I do about the actual franchise by now.



V. SaucySalamandr



Spoiler: When does the benevolent bonhomie of a friendly fandom devolve into the cancerous caverns of a volcano of vitriol? When acceptance and understanding of personal viewpoints differing from the base-line or party banner are thrown out the window. Such is life, such is fandom. Whatever happened to Live and Let Live? Now even minor missteps trigger talented trolls to take the time to target these "Terrible Things". Flame Wars rage across the world as the new series of World (Wide Web) Wars. And sure enough, a new tribe has arisen, the Anti-Fans, cancerous defenders of the right to hate fandoms.



W. Dark_Emperer



Spoiler: The Undertale community sucks. The game is fantastic, but the community is the polar opposite. They won't shut up about subversions of tropes in the game, spoiling content for new players. Some of the community thinks that there is only way the game is meant to be played and will harass content creators if they choose to play differently. Don't even think about calling the main character a boy or a girl, because you will be told otherwise. But aside from that? The fans are weirdly obsessed with making furry art, writing awkward fanfiction, and pushing narratives that don't exist.



X. GenisSageAceAttourny



Spoiler: Ugh. Don’t get me started on the spider fandom. We get it! They’re good, they eat bugs, but does that really justify all this surgery? These extra arms, the costume contact lenses. Let’s not even discuss (shudder) “webbing” parties. For me, though, the turning point was Arachnocon 2014. I could ignore the other stuff, I don’t generally care what people do in the privacy of their own homes, but releasing pounds of spiders on an unsuspecting public should be considered terrorism. I think they had to burn down half of Mentone just to contain the damage. The spider fandom sucks!



Y. Teck



Spoiler: The Steven Universe Fandom Sucks. My close friend loves Steven Universe. Having never seen it, I was invited to a podcast discussion. Little did I know the ENTIRE show was dedicated to it, not just the episode. I have learned only that the entire fanbase is rabidly aggresive. The "fans" I witnessed did nothing more than tear apart fanart for miniscule mistakes and creative differences. They bicker about nuances of character development while imposing iron clad rules banning opinion outright. In the few times they weren't screaming at each other, they took shots at other fandoms for seemingly no reason.



Progress:



Entrants voted: 21/25

Judges votes: 4/5

Poll votes: 89 So there won't be semi-finals due to the number of entrants, namely 25. We'll just go straight ahead to thePoll: https://goo.gl/forms/3zImBSvka4u3HRFy1 Here are all the entries of the contest:A. DemiGumB. John KeelC. zedleeftwD. ThePigE. breakingamberF. HuggawuggaG. HeatdoomH. LeftMeDeadI. JugajoJ. Monkey McDermottK. XXXTentacion037L. Lucelle BallM. TrarN. Trixter13O. deadleeplatapusP. Lesbian_Syphilitic_SpankerQ. heroic Kol playerR. PrusiasS. SmushinelloT. DudeCatsU. JXQZV. SaucySalamandrW. Dark_EmpererX. GenisSageAceAttournyY. TeckProgress:Entrants voted: 21/25Judges votes: 4/5Poll votes: 89 Last edited by mgawalangmagawa; Thu, Dec 20th, 2018 at 01:14 AM .