JustDominic

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Member Back to Top Post by JustDominic on My friend's mother is a rep for fashion photographers, and one of her mother's friends was going to be working on the ASOUE movie, and was given the first draft of the script. Their company was dropped with all the changes in production, and so my friend's mom's friend gave her the first draft of the script.



She typed some of it up for me over AIM because we are BEE EFF EFF's like that. So here are some excerpts with love. All credit goes to the amazing Lucy, whose AIM sn is MissLucy485 if you wish to talk to her about to the script or have her give you some more info.



missLUCY485: i have a friend who was going to do the costumes for the original one, but then they canceled it for a while and got a new crew entirely



missLUCY485: he made it so the whole movie was count olaf putting on a puppet show of the baudelaires in the first 3 books. it was good, so daniel handler, but ehh....its like 200 pgs or more long



missLUCY485: ok this is a diff part when the people go to the mansion

missLUCY485: EXT. BAUDELAIRE MANSION RUINS - NIGHT

missLUCY485: We're back at these ashy ruins, eerie in the dim light. We see the figures of the three AGENTS we saw on the TROLLEY, examining the wreckage. The PREGNANT AGENT holds the black V.F.D. BAG and is taking the WILL out of the ORNATE METAL BOX. The YOUNG BOY AGENT holds a cage just like SUNNY's, with something inside.

missLUCY485: okay thats one paragraph

missLUCY485: YOUNG GIRL AGENT (sadly) - To think, all this destruction is the result of the refraction and convergence of light.

missLUCY485: PREGNANT AGENT - If the Will is here, where are the Baudelaire children? What can this mean?

missLUCY485: The YOUNG GIRL AGENT looks at it;

missLUCY485: YOUNG GIRL AGENT - It means, "a place of refuge and protection"

missLUCY485: PREGNANT AGENT - We've got to get this to Josephine.

missLUCY485: YOUNG GIRL AGENT - We can't take it all teh way over there. Our enemies are watching the roads.

missLUCY485: YOUNG BOY AGENT - It'll have to get there as the crow flies

missLUCY485: He opens the cage, and we see a large CROW inside. He reaches in as we cut to.....

missLUCY485: OLAFS kitchen.



missLUCY485: ...the TOWER ROOM. The PREGNANT AGENT, still with her BLACK BAG reading V.F.D., is holding the TURQUOISE SOMBRERO, while the YOUNG BOY and YOUNG GIRL AGENTS are looking at VIOLET's INVENTION.

missLUCY485: YOUNG GIRL AGENT - Look at this.

missLUCY485: YOUNG BOY AGENT(smelling it) - Puttanesca

missLUCY485: YOUNG GIRL AGENT - The Baudelaires were here.

missLUCY485: The PREGNANT AGENT reaches into the BAG - it's stuffed with all sorts of papers and unreadable objects - and pulls out a PHOTO of a SOMBRERO. She holds it up : we have a match.

missLUCY485: PREGNANT AGENT - something's gone horribly wrong. Call josephine and tell her we're on our way.

missLUCY485: The other AGENTS nod, and the YOUNG GIRL AGENT takes out SPYGLASS and dials intp it as we cut to ..

missLUCY485: JOSEPHINE's LIBRARY - NIGHT

missLUCY485: KLAUS - So if we sail from Damocles Dock towards the Lavender Lighthouse, we'll reach the cave from the southwest. As long as we don't eat within the next hour -

missLUCY485: We hear the ringing of a phone. The baudelaires look at one another

missLUCY485: KLAUS - Aunt Josephine said she disconnected the telephone.

missLUCY485: It rings again, and the baudelaire look down at teh desk where the spyglass is vibrating slightly.

missLUCY485: VIOLET - it's not a telephone.

missLUCY485: oops

missLUCY485: i mean :

missLUCY485: VIOLET - It's not the telephone

missLUCY485: It rings again. Violet picks it up and looks it over. We hear a roll of thunder.

missLUCY485: KLAUS - The atlas has a warning about Hurricane Herman, a notorious storm that can strike at any -

missLUCY485: Sure enough, the library is suddenly engulfed in RAIN and WIND. The SPYGLASS is yanked from violet's hand and flies through the air. she grabs for it, but it eludes her and with out last ring, falls out the window. The baudelaires stand in the window looking down at teh spyglass as it tumbles. they stare for a moment and then with a sickening lurch, the entire room tilts toward the raging lake.

missLUCY485: there's a page where the agents find teh REAL baudelaire will, that says "under NO circumstances are you to entrust count olaf as guardian for violet claus and sunny. They are to be given to montgomery montgomery, but if that is not an option, please take them right to josephine annwhistle.



missLUCY485: The AGENTS continue to circle the HENCHPERSON OF INDETERMINATE GENDER, moving in for the kill. Well, not kill.

missLUCY485: This is elaboratly choreographed if somewhat ineffectual, looking more like a halftime show than a battle: The AGENTS twirl and parry with their SPYGLASSES while the HENCHPERSON OF INDETERMINATE GENDER swings its thick arms, whooshing over the agent's head.

missLUCY485: young girl agent -

missLUCY485: This is for Beatrice!

missLUCY485: the HENCHPERSON growls.

missLUCY485: PREGNANT AGENT - And this is for the secret passageway that you used without permission!

missLUCY485: Another growl.

missLUCY485: YOUNG BOY AGENT - And this is for -

missLUCY485: The henchperson swings its head toward the AGENT only to hit it on the arch.

missLUCY485: HENCHPERSON - Ow.

missLUCY485: (s)he blinks for a moment, and then falls on his or her face to the ground...

missLUCY485: GATE -NIGHT

missLUCY485: ...we see, at teh same moment, the gate swing open, while the BAUDELAIRES continue to stare.

missLUCY485: ARCH OF DAMOCLES DOCK - NIGHT

missLUCY485: young boy agent (to the girl agent) - that was surprisingly easy.

missLUCY485: But the young girl agent is striding purposefully toward the baudelaires, holding out her spyglass.

missLUCY485: young girl agent - violet, klaus, sunny - we're glad we found you.

missLUCY485: here, take this.

missLUCY485: She throws the spyglass to violet, who catches it absently.

missLUCY485: young girl agent - where is josephine?

missLUCY485: KLAUS leans down and picks up the atlas

missLUCY485: klaus (a bit dazed) - curdled cave, we think ... but...

missLUCY485: the pregnant agent approaches them with the bag.

missLUCY485: pregnant agent - we haven't much time. take thi-

missLUCY485: she holds out the bag but as she does so, in one carl stalling swoop, a net rises from the ground ensnarling every last agent like one of those wild game traps dr. livingstone set in the jungle. teh bag is tossed to the wet ground...

missLUCY485: gate - night

missLUCY485: ..and skims toward the baudelaires. sunny makes a grab for it, but it drops off the pier into the stormy lake. glump! the camera swivels back to...

missLUCY485: ..the arch, where the agents are a furious mass of netted humanity, dangling up in the air. below them, we see the two white faced women, standing at teh posts of teh arche smiling at one another in satisfaction

missLUCY485: (no clue)

missLUCY485: they are each holding the ropes controlling the nets.

missLUCY485: white faced woman 1 - there's something so satisfying about working with your hands.

missLUCY485: white faced women 2 - thank you.\

missLUCY485: they begin to tie the ropes to the arch, securing the net, while the pregnant agent pops her head out and calls to the baudelaires

missLUCY485: pregnant agent - we have the situation under control! baudelaires! get josephine and meet us back here.

missLUCY485: white faced woman 1 - josephine is alive?

missLUCY485: white faced woman 1 - josephine is alive?

missLUCY485: pregnant agent - go!

missLUCY485: the baudelaires go..



That's it for now...she is a fairly reliable source lol, so I believe her.



P.S.

I would never post anything which I knew to be false, that would serve no purpose at all and would not give me any pleasure at all, so if you think it's just me making up some stuff, please don't, I have no motive to do so.



Flaneur

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I will love you untill all the codes and hearts have been broken

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Member Back to Top Post by Flaneur on Okay, this was posted three days ago, it's already on the second page, and NO ONE HAS REPLIED. I have been forced to stop lurking and join, because I, for one, am really interested in this.



I don't have AIM at the moment, so I am unable to IM your friend. Do you have anymore information at all? For instance - does anyone in this screenplay say that the Baudelaire parents were the leaders of VFD? Are the scouts ever named, and are they puppets too? Does this strike anyone else as being extremely trippy? I really, really, really like it, but I can see why it was not made into the movie; the public at large would not get it.



THIS EXCHANGE:

missLUCY485: white faced woman 1 - there's something so satisfying about working with your hands.

missLUCY485: white faced women 2 - thank you.

is really creepy.



This is a weird-wonderful thing, this screenplay.



EDIT: Oh, and would it be all right with you if I copied this and posted it on several LiveJournal ASoUE communities? I will credit you.

Humbert

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Member Back to Top Post by Humbert on I agree - I'm suprised this hasn't had more attention.



(Maybe the awkward reading involved due to copy-and-pasting from IM has something to do with it.)



I'd love to get my hands on this script - but no way do I believe it's a "first draft". No one besides Handler would have seen his first draft. I doubt it's even the first draft that was handed into the studio.



If there are no scene numbers then it wasn't even written as a shooting script.



The relevance of this is that this draft (even if written by Daniel Handler) was likely heavily directed by the studio execs. So it's not necessarily what Handler would have wanted the movie to be like, he may have been just following studio notes at that point. (Hollywood's a funny place.)



Note, however, that VFD was even more a part of this draft (apparently) than in the final film...

ImAFemmeFatale

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Member Back to Top Post by ImAFemmeFatale on Hi, I just made this account, and I'm missLUCY485.



I assure you this script is real. I have absolutely NO reason to make this up. I would just want to see it if i were you. I also assure you that every word, including the shooting directions, is Daniel Handler, which you can tell merely by the way of writing. Ask me anything, I'll tell you. I will type up more if you like. It was the shooting script. There are scene numbers i just didn't want to write out. I'll write you out the first few pages now to show everyone my authenticity. And no, it is not the FIRST draft, but when the movie was first being made. The original movie was canceled, and this was the script that was to be used. Unfortunatly, it was delayed for long enough that the crew was changed. I will type up the script exactly as I see it to the best of my ability. Here you are:



1. EXT. HILLTOP CEMETARY - DAY 1



This movie beins where most things end: A CEMETERY, one of the old-fashioned kinds, with rustling iron fates, and ivy. One TOMBSTONE reads "Beatrice - darling, dearest, dead," and there's a large and sinister CROW perched on top of it. Leaning wearily against another TOMBSTONE is a MAN in a GREY SUIT with a black FLOWER in the lapel.



The CROW caws. The MAN sighs.



LEMONY SNICKET

(for it is none other)

Hello, film enthusiasts. I am Lemony Snicket. I am the narrator of this motion picture, a phrase which here means "the man who insists on telling you the events in the story," although this story is so utterly miserable that I can scarcely speak of them. I am sorry to tell you that this dreadful movie contains such unfortunate events as this...



We cut to



INT. JOSEPHINE'S LIBRARY - NIGHT



...a large, formal LIBRARY, filled with BOOKSHELVES and overstuffed furniture. An enormous set of CURTAINS, obviously covering a huge WINDOW, dominates the room. Into the frame pops a woman with glasses, her hair up in a bun and a long fluttering SCARF around her neck. This woman (AUNT JOSEPHINE) opens her mouth and delivers a fluttering, somewhat ridiculously melodramatic SCREAM, flailing her arms over her head. She disappears from the frame and we see a bright BLUE rush toward the window. There is an enormous SHATTERING OF GLASS and the CURTAINS heave in the wind, blocking our view. Finally they part to reveal a vaguely person-shaped hole in a huge WINDOW, with JOSEPHINE's SCARF caught on a spike of glass, looking out over a STORMY SKY and down to the TURBULENT WATERS of a body of water ( LAKE LACHRYMOSE) . Did she throw herself out the window?



EXT. HILLTOP CEMETARY - DAY



MR. SNICKET stands up, getting more agitated.





Alright, well that's all for now because there's so much left just in this scene and I don't have time to type it all. But, if you do want more just say it and i'll type some more.

Flaneur

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Member Back to Top Post by Flaneur on OMMIGOSH YES PLEASE DO TYPE MORE.



Now, I will ask you: do you mind if I post the script fragments you have here on some ASoUE LiveJournal communities for discussion? You will be credited.



I like very much the black flower in Mr. Snicket's lapel. And the fact that Beatrice is included (I can't believe they omitted all mention of her from the version used. Augh! How could they!)

ImAFemmeFatale

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Member Back to Top Post by ImAFemmeFatale on

B. This script came from a friend of my mom's who was supposed to do the costumes for the original movie, but when they stopped the movie for a while due to money issues, I was given the script because they didn't need her anymore. When the movie was started up again, they chose new costume people.

C. Yes, I'm sure I can prove the authenticity of the script, if you'd like me to take pictures of it I will. There was an original cover to it that had the Paramount emblem on it, but it tore off when I brought it to my country house and I dont know where it is. I'll look for it though. You can ask me questions whatever you please. But yes, I could easily prove the authenticity of it, but honestly, isn't it incredibly easy to tell it is Daniel Handler?! C'mon people, what reason would I have to lie about this? Sheeeesh. It's so hard to please people around here. (but, thank you to the people who do believe me of course. I'm sure you're happy to have it)

I'll post more of the script now if you'd like - the next scene I suppose.



17. EXT. EDGE OF THE BEACH - DAY 17



MR. SNICKET steps into the frame and stares sadly, first at the departing ENGINE and then at the BAUDELAIRES.



18. EXT. SHORE - DAY 18



All three BAUDELAIRES are staring out at the calm waters of the ocean. VIOLET puts her SUITCASE down on the sand, and presses a button on its top. It opens like a Venus flytrap, emitting a mechanical whir. KLAUS opens his BOOK.



VIOLET

Do you think this will be as good as the mailbox?



KLAUS

I think this will be better than the mailbox.



SUNNY nods in agreement, as a crazy Rube Goldberg DEVICE emerges from the SUITCASE. MR. SNICKET steps into the frame.



LEMONY SNICKET

Violet Baudelaire is the eldest Baudelaire child. She is fourteen years old and she is right-handed but even more interesting in that she is one of the finest inventors the world has ever known.



We cut to



19. EXT. BAUDELAIRE MANSION – NIGHT 19



…an enormous mansion, all turrets and domes and such. We move toward one particular WINDOW as we hear a voice call



BAUDELAIRE FATHER (V.O.)

Violet Baudelaire!



The camera reaches the window and we’re in



20. INT. BAUDELAIRE LIBRARY – NIGHT 20



…a formal, wood-paneled LIBRARY. The camera focuses on a LARGE DESK, where the otherwise unseen BAUDEALIRE FATHER is placing a red wax SEAL on a calligraphied page of parchment. At the top, it reads “THE BAUDELAIRE WILL.”



BAUDELAIRE FATHER

Please come downstairs and do the dishes!



VIOLET (O.S.)

But Dad – I’m at a very crucial moment in the process!



As she replies, the camera moves up to the next floor…



21 INT. VIOLET’S BEDROOM – NIGHT 21



…and we’re in VIOLET’s bedroom, dominated by a large WORKBENCH where VIOLET stands over the INVENTION we saw on the trolley. Mr. SNICKET stands behind her.



LEMONY SNICKET

Whenever you see her put her hair up in a ribbon like this –



VIOLET ties her hair up in a ribbon, puts on some welding goggles, and primly fires up a welding torch. MR. SNICKET also puts on some goggles.



LEMONY SNICKET

(shouting over the torch)

--it’s a sure sign she’s working on some fantastic device!



We back cut to…



22. EXT. SHORE – DAY 22



…the shore. VIOLET is hunched over her INVENTION with an old-fashioned OIL CAN and making a minute adjustment. KLAUS is reading his BOOK, walking in careful, measured strides and holding a long STICK. SUNNY is nowhere to be seen on the otherwise empty horizon.



KLAUS

Violet, would you say that it’s early mid-afternoon or late mid-afternoon?



VIOLET shades her eyes and looks at the sky.



VIOLET

I would say it’s mid-mid-afternoon



KLAUS nods, drives the STICK into the ground, squints out at the ocean as if surveying something, and looks back at his book as MR. SNICKET returns.



LEMONY SNICKET

The young man with the book is Klaus Baudelaire. He’s a bit older than twelve.



23 EXT. BAUDELAIRE MANSION – NIGHT 23

We’re back at the same mansion, with the camera moving toward the same window.



BAUDELAIRE MOTHER (V.O.)

Klaus Baudelaire!



The camera has once again reached …



24. INT. BAUDELAIRE LIBRARY - NIGHT 24



Now we see the hands of the BAUDELAIRE MOTHER, who is rolling up the SEALED WILL and placing it in an ORNATE METAL BOX.



BAUDELAIRE MOTHER

It is nearly an hour past your bedtime!



KLAUS (V.O.)

But I’ve just reached a crucial part of the analysis!



As before, the camera moves up a floor to



25. INT. KLAUS’S BEDROOM – NIGHT 25



…KLAUS, who is sitting in BED reading a COMICALLY THICK BOOK by the light of an AMBITIOUS BEDSIDE LAMP. LEMONY SNICKET stands behind the headboard talking to us.



LEMONY SNICKET

Klaus is a rhetorically encyclopedic euhemerist, a phrase which here means “the sort of person who reads everything he can get his hands on…



KLAUS turns a page.



LEMONY SNICKET

…and stores it all in his brain for precisely the right moment.”



We cut back to



A. Hi, I'm Lucy..?B. This script came from a friend of my mom's who was supposed to do the costumes for the original movie, but when they stopped the movie for a while due to money issues, I was given the script because they didn't need her anymore. When the movie was started up again, they chose new costume people.C. Yes, I'm sure I can prove the authenticity of the script, if you'd like me to take pictures of it I will. There was an original cover to it that had the Paramount emblem on it, but it tore off when I brought it to my country house and I dont know where it is. I'll look for it though. You can ask me questions whatever you please. But yes, I could easily prove the authenticity of it, but honestly, isn't it incredibly easy to tell it is Daniel Handler?! C'mon people, what reason would I have to lie about this? Sheeeesh. It's so hard to please people around here. (but, thank you to the people who do believe me of course. I'm sure you're happy to have it)I'll post more of the script now if you'd like - the next scene I suppose.17. EXT. EDGE OF THE BEACH - DAY 17MR. SNICKET steps into the frame and stares sadly, first at the departing ENGINE and then at the BAUDELAIRES.18. EXT. SHORE - DAY 18All three BAUDELAIRES are staring out at the calm waters of the ocean. VIOLET puts her SUITCASE down on the sand, and presses a button on its top. It opens like a Venus flytrap, emitting a mechanical whir. KLAUS opens his BOOK.VIOLETDo you think this will be as good as the mailbox?KLAUSI think this will be better than the mailbox.SUNNY nods in agreement, as a crazy Rube Goldberg DEVICE emerges from the SUITCASE. MR. SNICKET steps into the frame.LEMONY SNICKETViolet Baudelaire is the eldest Baudelaire child. She is fourteen years old and she is right-handed but even more interesting in that she is one of the finest inventors the world has ever known.We cut to19. EXT. BAUDELAIRE MANSION – NIGHT 19…an enormous mansion, all turrets and domes and such. We move toward one particular WINDOW as we hear a voice callBAUDELAIRE FATHER (V.O.)Violet Baudelaire!The camera reaches the window and we’re in20. INT. BAUDELAIRE LIBRARY – NIGHT 20…a formal, wood-paneled LIBRARY. The camera focuses on a LARGE DESK, where the otherwise unseen BAUDEALIRE FATHER is placing a red wax SEAL on a calligraphied page of parchment. At the top, it reads “THE BAUDELAIRE WILL.”BAUDELAIRE FATHERPlease come downstairs and do the dishes!VIOLET (O.S.)But Dad – I’m at a very crucial moment in the process!As she replies, the camera moves up to the next floor…21 INT. VIOLET’S BEDROOM – NIGHT 21…and we’re in VIOLET’s bedroom, dominated by a large WORKBENCH where VIOLET stands over the INVENTION we saw on the trolley. Mr. SNICKET stands behind her.LEMONY SNICKETWhenever you see her put her hair up in a ribbon like this –VIOLET ties her hair up in a ribbon, puts on some welding goggles, and primly fires up a welding torch. MR. SNICKET also puts on some goggles.LEMONY SNICKET(shouting over the torch)--it’s a sure sign she’s working on some fantastic device!We back cut to…22. EXT. SHORE – DAY 22…the shore. VIOLET is hunched over her INVENTION with an old-fashioned OIL CAN and making a minute adjustment. KLAUS is reading his BOOK, walking in careful, measured strides and holding a long STICK. SUNNY is nowhere to be seen on the otherwise empty horizon.KLAUSViolet, would you say that it’s early mid-afternoon or late mid-afternoon?VIOLET shades her eyes and looks at the sky.VIOLETI would say it’s mid-mid-afternoonKLAUS nods, drives the STICK into the ground, squints out at the ocean as if surveying something, and looks back at his book as MR. SNICKET returns.LEMONY SNICKETThe young man with the book is Klaus Baudelaire. He’s a bit older than twelve.23 EXT. BAUDELAIRE MANSION – NIGHT 23We’re back at the same mansion, with the camera moving toward the same window.BAUDELAIRE MOTHER (V.O.)Klaus Baudelaire!The camera has once again reached …24. INT. BAUDELAIRE LIBRARY - NIGHT 24Now we see the hands of the BAUDELAIRE MOTHER, who is rolling up the SEALED WILL and placing it in an ORNATE METAL BOX.BAUDELAIRE MOTHERIt is nearly an hour past your bedtime!KLAUS (V.O.)But I’ve just reached a crucial part of the analysis!As before, the camera moves up a floor to25. INT. KLAUS’S BEDROOM – NIGHT 25…KLAUS, who is sitting in BED reading a COMICALLY THICK BOOK by the light of an AMBITIOUS BEDSIDE LAMP. LEMONY SNICKET stands behind the headboard talking to us.LEMONY SNICKETKlaus is a rhetorically encyclopedic euhemerist, a phrase which here means “the sort of person who reads everything he can get his hands on…KLAUS turns a page.LEMONY SNICKET…and stores it all in his brain for precisely the right moment.”We cut back to