I pray my husband and I will live to see our son reunited with his child

Our son has been going through agony in the last 10 years and the knock-on effect has devastated our entire family. We grandparents never got to see our only granddaughter at birth. Why, after paying thousands in solicitor's fees and eventually getting a contact order, are things not enforced?

Two weeks after the order he arrived at his former home to find the mother had moved away. More fees to hire a private detective. She was found and eventually had to comply with contact.

Over the next four-and-half years, contact was 14 hours a month. Our son was never allowed to take his daughter on holiday and had her to stay only one weekend in his house.

All contact has been refused since 2006. He receives no school reports and has had one photograph. Parcels, gifts, cards and letters are sent regularly to her from Dad and family and maintenance has always been paid.

Changes must be made to support fathers who desperately want to see their children. Mediation is now the only option.

I put on a brave face most of the time and I pray that my husband and I will live to see our son reunited with his only child. Somebody out there help these fathers, please.

Name and address supplied

My parents separated in 2001, when I was eight and my sister five ("How a new age of fathers' rights is taking hold", In Focus). Both my parents wanted us to retain a strong relationship with each of them and so it was decided between them that they would "share us". We spent every Monday and Tuesday nights and alternate weekends with our dad and the rest with our mum. After eight years, my sister and I felt we were constantly in limbo; we felt as though we had no real home.

With the support of our mum, we spoke to Dad and told him we wanted the situation to change. Although he was upset he could see this was affecting us and he valued our happiness. Although we now tend just to see him alternate weekends I feel that our relationship is now stronger as we value our time together more.

You said: "Only about 11% of children from broken homes go on to spend equal amounts of time with each parent", without speaking to any children in this situation. After eight years of living this "ideal" scenario, it became complicated and impractical. The happiness our parents were trying to create turned to unhappiness.

Leah Sharman

Bournemouth

Last week, I received a telephone call from a policewoman threatening me with arrest. My crime? Sending three cards to my grandson telling him I love him. He had his third birthday last week and as my son's former partner will not allow me to see him I put birthday wishes in our local newspaper. My son is fighting through the family courts to regain the access he had with his son until March this year but he still is not seeing his little boy.

My son's ex-partner saw my cards as harassment. Don't you think the police have more important things to do than threaten a 67-year-old grandmother?

Name and address supplied

I'm single and not a parent, but I noticed that none of the concerned fathers you quoted made any reference to their children's feelings.

That the men you interviewed seemed incapable of putting their children's feelings above their own is illustrative of a bias in the home of the very children those men purport to wish to protect.

Vivian Frew

London EC1

"Home" needs to become a space that is healthily shared by women and men, not a battleground.

Alongside the gains of feminism in making the space "out in the world" a much more healthily distributed one between men and women, there needs to be a similar recalibration of power and perception in the shared space of home. This has to be in the interests of us all.

Phil Goss

Senior lecturer in psychotherapy

University of Central Lancashire