My adopted religion, Judaism, has given me countless beautiful gifts, however, it has taken the crown jewel out of my life: the Christmas tree.

For years this caused major drama in the month of December. I resented Hanukkah — “It’s not even a major holiday!” I would bitterly yell from the rooftops (what do you think of that, Fiddler?). Then I had kids and instead of missing Christmas even more, I’m happy to have a distanced view of it.

The question is — and we will try to answer it during this semi-essay — am I truly over Christmas, or am I sad that it's not really mine anymore? Please respond with kindness and humanity in the comments below.

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My family has Christmas with our non-Jewish relatives at my mother’s house and we have the best Christmas Eve tradition: we celebrate talent night. My tone-deaf family sings, dances and recites very dark French poetry (my mother even smoked a cigarette indoors once, oooh). This night is the best. All the kids love it. But perhaps the holiday could just end there.

What happened to some tastefully placed lights highlighting a classic wreath? Why do you have an inflated Minion on your front lawn?

When you have babies Christmas morning is so sweet. They get one toy — they’re so happy. They sing some songs, they break an ornament, they eat a cookie. But then they start going to school. And the world starts to revolve around the Christmas haul. A haul I’ve never given in to. So that means months of anticipation for what I know will be an anticlimactic morning. And months of me feeling guilty, but just NOT BEING ABLE TO BUY ANY MORE CRAP.

However, it’s more than just the unnecessary gifts that have turned me off of Christmas. It’s everything all around me from November 1st till December 25th. People DO celebrate other things, Ms. Yorkdale-Mall-music selector. It all gets too crazy! Can we be a normal amount of excited for things? With Halloween celebrated like it’s the armistice of the third world war, Christmas has the feeling of a UFO landing. What happened to some tastefully placed lights highlighting a classic wreath? Why do you have an inflated Minion on your front lawn? (Though we will walk past your Minion 10 times this season just to kill some minutes before dinner, so thanks!)

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The world is ending, peak climate change is upon us and yet we continue with L.O.L. balls full of garbage, overpriced dolls and the stories of a jolly man who has to be white unless you want a lot of angry trolls yelling at you. No, Virginia, this isn’t a season that speaks to everyone.

I would be so much happier with this holiday-that-is-only-half-mine if we could just revert to simpler times, find a compromise. Start a talent night, bake some cookies, say hi to your neighbours and pull back on the beautifully wrapped garbage.

But were my darling husband to give in and tell me we could have a tree this year — I’d have the world's biggest. So, what is it? Am I over it? Or am I sad? I’m just desperate for the world to sing a song off-key with me and pull back a bit on this whole Christmas thing.