Sure, they said they cared about creating jobs. But that was while they were running to take back their country from secret Muslim Kenyan socialists who want to kill your grandma and make your kids eat vegetables. Now that they're in control, jobs have taken a back seat to the issues that matter most in America: denying health care to low-income women.

And they'll shut down the whole damn government to do it. Via the Minnesota Independent:



In a webinar with anti-abortion rights activists Tuesday evening, Rep. Michele Bachmann said that she voted against the continuing resolution aimed at avoiding a government shutdown because it didn’t defund Planned Parenthood and “Obamacare.” She called abortion the “watershed issue of our time” and said she’s prepared to fight “eyeball-to-eyeball” to defund Planned Parenthood in the next continuing resolution in two weeks. The “Defunding Planned Parenthood: Urgent Nationwide Webcast,” observed by the Minnesota Independent, was hosted by anti-abortion rights group the Susan B. Anthony List. “Abortion is the watershed issue of our time,” Bachmann said. “We shouldn’t have one red cent go for Planned Parenthood,” calling it an opportunity abortion rights opponents have not had before.

Not only is denying health care to low-income women the "watershed issue of our time," according to Bachmann, but it's also the "point where you draw the line in the sand and you have a hill where you die on." And then, after you die on that hill, you have both "an eyeball-to-eyeball fight" and a "knock down, drag down fight." That's a lot of fighting. And a lot of metaphors.

And, in accordance with the Bachmann Rule (a closely related cousin of the Palin Rule) that every time she opens her mouth, she says something crazy and/or wrong, she also claimed that she opposed the continuing resolution to keep the government running because it does not defund "Obamacare," which uses taxpayer money to pay for abortions "for the first time in history." Factcheck.org and Politifact.com have already debunked that tired old lie that the Affordable Care Act pays for abortions; it doesn't.

But Bachmann is also wrong that taxpayer dollars have never been used to pay for abortions. See, once upon a time, Medicaid (funded with taxpayer dollars) did pay for abortions. They weren't just for wealthy women who could afford to pay private family doctors or hop jets out of the country. Low-income women were entitled to the procedure too.

But Rep. Henry Hyde put a stop to that with the heinous Hyde Amendment that says low-income women can go fuck themselves. His dream was to tell all women to go fuck themselves, but he figured starting with low-income women was a good first step, because no one cares about them anyway.

Three decades later, with the Hyde Amendment renewed every single year and the current Democratic president "comfortable reiterating that status quo", turns out Hyde was right.

But dumb-as-dirt Bachmann can't even get her own side's propaganda right. So instead of trying to find a way to keep the government from shutting down, and instead of doing the one thing she and her party promised to do—create jobs—Bachmann and the rest of the nuts are going to draw lines in the sand on hills where they'll die eyeball-to-eyeball to deny low-income women access to cancer screening and STD testing and treatment and contraception because carrying out Henry Hyde's dream to tell women to go fuck themselves is much more important than creating jobs.

Ah, the culture of life.