Every so often I encourage people in my life to run for public office. It's a rant I'll save for another time, but one point I make to them which I'll share now is this: long ago are the days when one needed to have a rectum as clean and pure as the wind-driven polar vortex. Joe Biden is running for the highest office in our land if not our world. Bear that in mind as you watch this cartoon, foisted upon us by some internet hoodlum who just couldn't resist putting one of Biden's senile ramblings into horrific visuals.

You will never be able to unsee what I just plastered into your mind, forever. I figured if I had to see it, why not take you down with me. Misery, as they say, loves to wallow in the sty together. But what else did you expect? Joe Biden's personal brand is pull my finger, then pull the finger between my legs.

By the way, if you were scratching your head with a fork, then a knife, then a shovel trying to rid it of what it is I just cursed upon you, wondering if the words from Cartoon Biden came from Real Biden, yes.

Listen, Trump is kind of an ass. He's our ass, sure, but let's not kid ourselves. While some moments of his are pure gold and I am immensely entertained, the main ain't perfect.

But holy self-tanning anus, he isn't Joe Biden. Can we really pretend anymore this dude isn't a freak? Can we really say, with any certainty, he's not a full-blown creep and possibly a diddler of children? Who in Gia's paradise says things like Joe Biden? This question isn't rhetorical. I'm serious. What the actual fork is wrong with this man?

I agreed the "grab 'em by the p*ssy" wasn't Trump's finest moment. Fair argument. But how is the side that got all hot in the cleavage over a dude admitting he likes ladies' nether parts, allowing this man anywhere near a mic let alone the presidency? If you have an answer other than "beats me" tweet me.

In the meantime, remember to pull other people into the gutter mud with you. If you had to see the above video, so do your friends. It's like that gross blister just waiting to rupture. Don't lie to me, you know exactly what I'm talking about. The above video is the blister.

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