The Attorney General of New York has declared an auto-da-Gaia on evil Jews oil companies and begun an investigation inquisition on dastardly plots to question the one true Faith Climate Science.

“The investigation focuses on whether statements the company made to investors about climate risks as recently as this year were consistent with the company’s own long-running scientific research. “The people said the inquiry would include a period of at least a decade during which Exxon Mobil funded outside groups that sought to undermine climate science, even as its in-house scientists were outlining the potential consequences — and uncertainties — to company executives.”

Of course, this assumes that Climate Science!!1! is holy scripture and that any disagreement whatsoever must be a lie. Exxon Mobil (the target of the inquisition) vehemently proclaims their innocence:

“Kenneth P. Cohen, vice president for public affairs at Exxon Mobil, said on Thursday that the company had received the subpoena and was still deciding how to respond. “‘We unequivocally reject the allegations that Exxon Mobil has suppressed climate change research,’ Mr. Cohen said, adding that the company had funded mainstream climate science since the 1970s, had published dozens of scientific papers on the topic and had disclosed climate risks to investors.”

Of course, even the eeevil oil company has openly professed their adherence to the One True Faith:

“The history at Exxon Mobil appears to differ, in that the company published extensive research over decades that largely lined up with mainstream climatology. Thus, any potential fraud prosecution might depend on exactly how big a role company executives can be shown to have played in directing campaigns of climate denial, usually by libertarian-leaning political groups.”

In other words, the companies are accused not of even disagreeing with “mainstream climatology”, but of funding other groups that have dared to question doomsday climate hysterics.

If anything, it would seem that the only fraud they have committed is not buying environmental apocalypse, but going along anyway to avoid just the type of persecution they now face.

Ultimately the question is, just how pure is your Climate Faith?



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