There’s the whole Shamar Thomas story arc which feels like pulling teeth. Laura Alexander shows some promise but goes out anyways and I can’t base my feelings on unrealized potential. My probem with the fans in the pre-merge is that in my opinion, the Cool Kids, who in theory should be the villains of the tribe, are the only likable people. Everyone else is just void of any personality, Shamar, or annoying like Sherri Biethman.

As for the Favorites tribe, they aren’t much better. You have Francesca Hogi go out first for a second time, which admittedly was kind of funny. After that it’s a whole bunch of Phillip Sheppard trying to be Boston Rob when he’s more like a bad caricature of Coach Wade if Coach was unfunny. The whole Brandon Hantz meltdown adds a tinge of ickiness to it all and you can’t help but feel like he shouldn’t have been on the island in the first place.

The only thing that really keeps the pre-merge afloat is the legendary Tata the bushman. The most womanizing little man the world has ever seen. If the show could bring back Tata as a contestant one day, I would truly be appreciative.

Where things really pick up is when the merge starts. Corinne Kaplan is blindsided by Phillip’s Stealth R Us alliance for defecting over to the fans plus Malcolm Freberg alliance. It’s actually a very smart move that cuts Malcolm at the knees and immediately throws him into an underdog position.

“First I was up here. Now? Not so much”.

The thing about Malcolm is that as Survivor: Philippines proved, he works best as a Survivor character in the underdog role. Malcolm is left with only Michael Snow, Reynold and Eddie at his side. Luckily for them, they are also the three best challenge competitors (until John Cochran emerges as the Wrestlemania Undertaker of Caramoan challenges) plus Michael and Malcolm has a buttload of idols at his disposal.

His first idol play comes during Michael’s boot episode. The plan was for everybody in their core to target Andrea Boehlke and direct votes towards Reynold so that he could play his idol and idol out Andrea. After the votes had been cast, as Reynold was going to give Jeff Probst his idol, Malcolm stopped in his tracks with the now classic “hold up bro” (he actually says hold up Reynold but nobody remembers that). Unfortunately a lot of the coolness of that moment is retroactively taken away by Max Dawson’s cringey attempts at re-creating it in Worlds Apart. In the moment, Malcolm gets Reynold to give him his idol to play for himself. Unfortunately, Malcolm read the situation wrong and Michael still gets voted out of the game.

Not to be deterred, Malcolm and his lackeys are back at it the following round. Knowing one of them has to win to stay alive, Reynold pulls out an immunity challenge win. This sets the scene for one of the better tribal councils in recent memory and the birth of the “live tribal”. Andrea’s face when Malcolm pulls out that second idol is something that has always stuck with me. In that moment, she is sure she is going to get idol-ed out of the game by two separate idols and you just see the desperation on her face. Cochran is already having a panic attack over the wrench it throws in his plans. Dawn Meehan’s jaw literally drops. This is an amazing moment even if strategically, it probably isn’t Malcolm’s best move.

Apologies for the terrible quality of the video but this is definitely a moment that is best appreciated by simply watching it to capture everybody’s reactions. Malcom’s “bastards, come on” is awesome. So is his “you’re popular” to Eddie as the Three Amigos sit there with shit-eating grins with everyone else around them looking around in despair. There’s also Phillip’s need to be holier than thou to the very end and acting like a victim when he has been trying to push people around all game. It’s a very sweet moment to watch at home.

Having burned their idols, Malcolm begins his quest to replenish his stock of idols by purchasing a clue for the hidden immunity idol at the Survivor auction. He pinpoints the general area where it is hidden but is then stopped in his tracks when Andrea simply goes to hang out with him. It becomes a stand-still where neither player will leave and Andrea effectively stops Malcolm from being able to find his protection. This probably saves Andrea’s life, at least for the time being. Unable to find the idol, Malcolm is sent home after putting up one hell of a fight from the bottom.

Reynold follows Malcolm quickly thereafter, leaving Eddie to fend for himself. Not seen as much of a threat, Eddie is basically ignored by the big alliance as they are now ready to turn on each other. Erik Reichenbach (yes he was on this season, blink and you may have missed it), finds the hidden immunity idol and gives it to Andrea. Mostly because he had no choice since everyone was there when he found it and the idol was found due to Andrea’s clue. This annoys some of his alliance members because he has now empowered one of the bigger targets left in the game.

Even with that idol, Andrea isn’t safe. This leads us into another blindside when Cochran and the alliance turns on Andrea and sends her out of the game with an idol in her pocket. In a season where there is so much talk about splitting votes, they do so yet again and end up not needing to worry about it. Eddie is spared by virtue of Andrea’s feeling safe which is funny because she may have been the most paranoid player in the game.

The next big event is the Loved Ones reward challenge which may be the cruelest thing Survivor has ever done. For the first time, the show has flown out two loved ones per contestant. Brenda wins the reward and chooses Dawn to go along with her. Before they can leave, Jeff offers Brenda the chance to give everybody else their loved ones if Brenda and Dawn sacrifice theirs. It puts Brenda in a catch-22 position. Give up her and Dawn’s loved ones and she’s loved by everyone else but people will see it as a huge jury management decision. Plus Dawn will likely have some ill feelings towards her. Keep the loved ones to herself and everyone else will now hold a grudge but Dawn will probably love her forever. In the end, Brenda chooses to give away her reward so that everybody else can enjoy theirs.

Featuring Cochran Sr, the lady-pleaser.

Cochran sees it purely as a game move that buys a lot of social equity with the group. He has already been suspicious of Brenda for plotting to get Cochran out after Eddie and this only adds to that paranoia. When Brenda refuses to cede immunity to Dawn at the next immunity challenge, it may be her death knell. Dawn ends up beating her out anyways and Cochran uses her vulnerability in the round to rally Sherri and Dawn, Brenda’s best friend in the game, to vote her out. Brenda’s exit is pretty heartbreaking when she breaks down into tears as she walks out of tribal council.

At final five, Erik isn’t even able to make it back to camp after the Brenda tribal council. He collapses from extreme starvation and gets pulled from the game. We hardly knew you Erik. Literally.

This is where Caramoan gets extremely comical. We are at final four, Eddie is still around and should he make final tribal council, he has a legitimate shot at winning. The same guy who has voted correctly twice throughout the entire game, three times if you count voting Malcolm on the re-vote of Malcolm’s boot… which you shouldn’t. He has made no strategic moves in this game and has largely been the less visible partner of the three amigos, none mostly for being attractive and being in a sort of showmance with Andrea.

Now compare Eddie’s resume to Cochran’s who has eight correct votes, has never been voted against and has somehow won three immunity challenges despite being built like Skinny Ryan’s smaller brother. It’s crazy that it would have ever been a discussion between the two but then again, we didn’t get to find out Cochran’s thoughts on opening up a dog bar.

Dogs are cool.

The final four challenge is basically a Cochran cakewalk as he puts together the final puzzle pretty fast and basically clinches his spot as the sole Survivor. There is a great moment where everybody has basically finished assembling their puzzle and Eddie finally places his first piece and gives this perfectly earnest fist pump in celebration. That is a microcosm of why people love Eddie even though he does basically nothing the entire season. Eddie just exists.

There is a pretty dark moment in final tribal council, I am of course talking about tooth-gate but aside from that, it’s a pretty good one. Sherri laughably believes she has a shot to win the game and thinks she has been running the show the whole time. She starts off her opening statement by revealing she runs multiple companies and sees all of the players as her employees that she likes to mistreat. She also gets in an argument with Erik and basically refuses to accept her status as a mega-goat.

For me, this final tribal council is all about Cochran. It’s the final chapter in his Survivor arc. In South Pacific he was this scared, nerdy superfan but two seasons later, he has gained some life experience and is way more comfortable with himself. His final tribal council is smart, confident, and really separates himself from Dawn as a player. Outside of Chris Daugherty and Todd Herzog, this may be the best final tribal council performance in the show’s history.

Cochran and his goats.

I guess a lot of your enjoyment of Caramoan depends on two things. First, you have to like Malcom because he provides a lot of the fireworks. It definitely helps if you also like Reynold’s brand of slightly douchey but still kind of likable charisma. Second, and this one is super important, you have to like Cochran. Caramoan is super Cochran centric in the same way that Redemption Island is sort of about Boston Rob. I have gone on record before as really liking Cochran both as a strategist and a character so seeing him pull off a perfect game is something I enjoyed.

Compare Caramoan to seasons like One World, Redemption Island where the winners dominate with nothing interesting happening. Put it up against something like World’s Apart where most of the contenders are terrible people and the winner is obvious for a long time. You can’t tell me that Cochran is less likable than someone like Brian Heidik. Seriously, despite its flaws, Caramoan at least delivers on some action and fireworks to satiate you even when you can see Cochran’s win coming from a mile away and that’s at least something.