The moment Phoenix stepped through the front door, a shrill cry of excitement ripped through air.

“PHOENIX!” His face was soon lost in a sea of red hair as his little sister threw herself into his arms.

He was shocked by the sudden prickling in the corners of his eyes. He’d missed Lila so much more than he realized. “Hey, twerp…. Jesus, did you grow like an inch since the last time I saw you?”

Lila just giggled as she finally pulled away from him. Phoenix hadn’t been joking — she looked so much more grown up since the last time he’d seen her. She was almost fourteen now, after all. But it was still so hard to believe. How had she changed so quickly?

It was a thought that brought a fleeting moment of sadness to his mind. I’m missing so much already.

“Welcome home, honey.” A soft gravelly voice called as his grandmother approached to give him a hug as well.

He could hear his mother sniffling beside him as she watched Hope and Phoenix embrace. She’d been a sobbing mess from the moment she’d set eyes on him at the airport. Devin had had to practically pry her off of him.

“I’m just so happy you’re home!” She’d kept saying the whole way back to the house.

And Phoenix was too, even if it was only for two short weeks.

He and Gigi would be staying at his mother’s house, but they already had plans for multiple visits with Erik and Rubi, and Gigi’s parents as well. Not to mention the friends they wanted to see too. It was going to be a busy visit, but Phoenix didn’t mind. He wanted to spend as much time with everyone as possible while he had the chance.

Phoenix had promised both Tam and Jasper that he’d go and see them right away when he arrived… Separately, of course. That part would sting. But he was so excited to see the two of them again, especially after everything that had happened.

So, despite his jet lag, after he and Gigi finished putting away their suitcases and having lunch with his family. Phoenix decided to give Tam a call and head over.

“Hey… Gigi?” He asked his wife softly as they finished clearing their plates from the table. “You said you wanted to take a nap after lunch, right?”

She nodded eagerly. “Yeah, I’m totally wiped.”

Phoenix couldn’t help a feeling of relief at her answer. “Great. ‘Cause I was thinking I’d head over to visit Tam while you were resting. Maybe go see Jasper too?”

Gigi’s face fell for a moment. “Oh… Well, if you’re willing to wait a couple hours, I can come too.” She suggested hopefully.

“I know Tam and Jasper really wanna see you too.” He assured her with a small smile. “And they will! But… Y’know. With everything that’s happened, I really want some time to see them alone first. Just for a little while.”

His wife’s face fell once more. But this time, it stayed that way. “Oh, okay. I get it.”

Phoenix held back a sigh. He knew that tone all too well. She’s just tired. He reminded himself. She’s always in a bad mood when she’s tired. “I’m sorry. They just really need this.”

“I guess I just wasn’t expecting you to ditch me the second we got back home.” Gigi shrugged as she spoke.

“I’m not ‘ditching you’.” The sigh he’d been holding back finally passed his lips. “I’ll probably be back before you even wake up.”

“Okay.” Gigi sounded so defeated… but at least she seemed to have dropped it. “Well, tell Tam I say hi, I guess.”

“I will… But you’re gonna get to see him yourself plenty of times before we leave.” He assured her. “And I promise I’ll be back before you know it, okay?”

She nodded as he gave her a soft kiss on the cheek.

———————————-

“God, Phee, I still can’t believe you’re really here!” Tam cried as he and Phoenix broke apart from their second hug. “Man, this must’ve been what Bilbo felt like when Gandalf showed up in Bag End again after all those years… It’s like I haven’t seen you in forever!”

“I know…” Phoenix beamed at his friend. “I missed you, Tam.”

“Me too.”

Tam had already broken out his game console and a couple of controllers before Phoenix arrived. They dived right into a few rounds of Space Dementia 4, laughing and joking together just as they always did. It was like Phoenix had never left.

While they played, Tam asked him all about his friends back in Brindleton Bay, and Phoenix was more than happy to talk about them.

They marveled together at how Niko had managed to single-handedly beat out three other teams at the college’s most recent trivia night. They laughed about how fiercely Addy had bid on eBay for a new mermaid figurine for her collection, only to realize it was one she already had. They even pulled up YouTube to watch Lola’s latest video together — a review/Let’s Play of the new Space Dementia DLC (which she and Duchess gave four meows out of five).

Phoenix was surprised at the way seeing Lola’s face on the screen had tugged at his heart. He hadn’t realized just how much he missed his new friends already. But at least he’d be seeing them again in just a few short weeks.

When Lola’s video was finally over, Tam went to the kitchen to grab the two of them a beer. And it was then that the huge elephant in the room finally began to rear its ugly head.

Sitting in the silence, it became painfully clear just how strange the apartment felt without Jasper there. It was so quiet. Lonely, almost.

“Tam…” Phoenix began nervously as his friend returned to the couch and took a sip of his drink. “I’ve been meaning to ask you… How’s everything going? I mean… are you okay?”

Tam didn’t even bother pretending. They both knew exactly what he was talking about. “I’m fine… mostly.” He answered with a small, sad sigh. “Some days are still really hard.”

“I get it.” Phoenix replied softly. “It sucks.”

“It does.” Tam agreed. “And I know it sucks for you being caught in the middle too… I still feel so shitty about that… And I’m sure Jas does too.”

“You both need to stop apologizing.” He said firmly, but kindly. “It’s fine. I love you guys. And I wanna be there for both of you as much as I can.”

“I know. And that means a lot, Phee. Seriously.”

Neither of them spoke for a few moments after that.

“So… have you guys talked about it more? How long you’re gonna have this ‘break’, I mean.” Phoenix asked. It had been a little over a month already. “Or… or maybe whether it’s gonna end up being more than just a break…” He added sadly.

“We have… But I still don’t know.” Tam confessed. “And I’m not really sure if Jas does either. It’s been pretty nice having some time to try and figure shit out on my own. It’s easier to focus, I guess.” He paused for a moment before continuing.

“I dunno how it all changed so fast, Phee. I still love Jas. You know I do… But it’s like our relationship started out as this kickass, legendary item that gave us a bonus to all our stats… But then it turned into this awful, cursed piece of crap that stuck us with a -3 penalty to everything. And apparently put some kind of madness spell on Jas too.” He added bitterly.

“He fucked up.” Phoenix replied softly. “We both know that… And he knows it too, Tam.”

“I know.”

“And he still loves you too.”

“I know.” Tam repeated. “I just don’t understand how he could do that to me, Phee… Why the hell did he do it?” His voice shook slightly as he spoke.

He hesitated before replying with a question of his own. “Well… why do you think he did it?”

“Besides being drunk off his ass?” Tam was thoughtful for a few moments. “Well, it’s like I said — everything was changing. It was all going to shit, basically. And… I guess he could feel it too. Maybe he was just as fed up as I was.” He shrugged. “Still no excuse for what he did though.”

“There’s no excuse. He never should have done that.” Phoenix nodded sympathetically. “You keep mentioning ‘changes’ though… What do you think was changing?”

Tam shrugged. “Everything. How much time we spent together, who we were hanging out with… It was like we suddenly had different priorities or something. Like we’d both spent all this time working on the main questline together, but then we each picked up different side quests. And we both thought ours was the most important… Do you know what I mean?”

His friend nodded once more.

“And I know it wasn’t just Jas’ fault. He put the last nail in our coffin, but I know I fucked up too. But it just started feeling like he…” His voice suddenly trailed away. “Hey! I see what you’re doing!” He chuckled softly. “You’re trying to pull your therapist Jedi mind tricks on me!”

His friend smiled guiltily. “Sorry… But I’m glad it got you talking?” Phoenix admitted. “I really think you’ve gotta talk through all this shit, Tam. It’s the only way you’re gonna figure it out… Or even just writing it out could be good too. Like a journal or something? I know it always helps me.”

Tam smiled warmly. “Thanks for the advice, Dr. Rosebrook.” He teased. “But I’ll be okay. I’m gonna figure this thing out, one way or another…” Tam paused to pull out his phone, checking the time. “Oh shit. Sorry, Phee. I don’t wanna kick you out or anything. But Taylor’s supposed to be here any minute.”

“Taylor?” Phoenix raised an eyebrow. “Who’s he?”

“She is… Just a girl I’ve been, uh, hanging out with.” Tam shrugged, his expression almost guilty.

His brow furrowed in concern. “You’re seeing someone else already?”

“We’ve just hung out a couple times. It’s nothing serious.” Tam assured him quickly. “And she knows that too.”

“And what about Jasper? How much does he know? Is he okay with this?”

He was surprised when Tam nodded. “Well, I don’t think he knows about Taylor yet…” He clarified. “But that was one of the first things we talked about after the fight — Whether we’re allowed to see other people during our break. And we both decided it was okay.”

Phoenix said nothing. He was still trying to process it — here he was thinking there was still hope for his brother and Tam. But if Tam was already seeing someone else…

“I know what you’re thinking.” Tam continued before Phoenix could reply. “But it’s complicated, Phee. Jas is the only person I’ve ever been with. And we were together for such a long time…”

“I get it.” Phoenix promised. “I’m not judging you or anything, I swear. I’m just.. I dunno. It’s sad.” He confessed softly. “I mean, honestly this is starting to sound less like a break, and more like a break up…”

Tam’s voice was thick as he replied. “Yeah… it is sounding that way, isn’t it?” He cleared his throat softly before continuing. “Look, Phee, I know this whole thing is so messed up. And I’m just trying to get through it the best I can.”

“I know.”

“And I hope Jas is too… We’ve been talking a little. But when we do, he never says very much about how he’s doing or anything…”

“I haven’t seen him yet.” Phoenix replied. “But that’s where I’m heading next.” At last he rose from the couch. He wanted to get out of there without being forced to meet that girl Tam was ‘hanging out with’. It would just be too awkward.

“Good. Go cheer him up, Phee. You’re really good at that.” Tam smiled warmly as he rose to his feet as well. “I hope he’s okay. And I really hope you are too?”

“I am.” He forced a small smile as he spoke. “Don’t worry about me.”