As a fan/writer, sometimes I wish I could get the opportunity to speak to and interview Mike Trout and let him know how much of a fan I am.

Then I thought about it, and I pondered. Trout is “boring” in the sense that he never gives sensationalist quotes; he tells it like it is and employs many clichés along the way. So Halos Heaven decided to conduct a “totally real” interview with a “totally real” Mike Trout and predict how he might answer.

On his approach to hitting the ball: “Yeah, I don’t look at all that video. I just like to slow the game down when I’m in the batter’s box, get a good pitch to hit, and drive it.”

On his clutch hit in last night’s game: “Yeah, you know [insert pitcher of choice] is a good ballplayer, but I just stood there and tried not to do too much and I got a pitch to hit, you know?”

On Kole Calhoun: “Yeah, Kole’s a great guy and works hard, he’s doing really good right now. Puttin’ some good swings on the ball and drivin’ in some runs and that’s what you gotta do.”

On Shohei Ohtani: “Yeah, it’s unbelievable what he’s done. Comin’ over here and just dominating this league like he’s been doin’ it his entire life. It’s fun to watch.”

On Andrelton Simmons: “Yeah, ya know, Simba, he’s just a good ballplayer. His defense is incredible, and uh, he looks for a pitch to drive and yeah, that’s how he has success.”

On injuries/slumps: “Yeah, it’s frustrating you know? But I’m just gonna keep going up there and grinding. Tryin’ to see the ball better and put the bat on the ball and contribute to the team.”

On being on pace for the greatest season of all time: “Yeah I seen that. I try not to look at the numbers. Just focusin’ on my game and gettin’ some good contact and the numbers will fall in place.”

On the Angels’ postseason chances: “Yeah, this is a good ballclub. Everyone’s real excited to be here and we’re confident, ya know? The goal is to make it to the World Series and I think we got a pretty good shot.”

On his improved fielding: “Yeah, I’m tryin’ to get better jumps on the ball. I’m seein’ it better off the bat and just tryin’ to help the team throw up some zeroes.”

On the pitching success: “Yeah, it’s really good for the team, to see our guys throw the ball in the zone and get those zeroes, ya know.”

Are there any Trout-isms we missed? Comment below!