10 Logic Defying Lawsuits that Had Their (Weird) Day in Court

When some folks find logic in things that others cannot see, they drag the other party to the court of law to unintentionally create laughter riots. Some have valid reasons – what they believe them to be – to support their cause; for others, such a practice is just for the sake of doing it. Aiming to force the legal system to lay a golden egg, such people tend to defy established norms and go beyond what seems downright comical – to others who are not gifted enough to see those loopholes in the system.

Here is a list of 10 such logic-defying lawsuits that would sure tickle your funny bones. We have made all possible efforts not to register their deeds in any preset order, since we believe each one of them deserves the #1 position.

Tennessee Porn Addict Sues Apple For Not Selling Its Devices In Safe Mode

Did you ever read or heard of someone linking his porn addiction to a mobile device that allows him unrestricted access to porn sites? Well, Chris Sevier, a former Nashville attorney, did it when he accused Apple of not filtering adult content and providing unfettered access to the world of pornography.

The 50-page complaint narrated how he accidentally replaced the “face” in “Facebook.com” with the mighty four-letter F word, which eventually led him to lose his interest in his wife and hence, brought his marital life to a tragic end. Unfortunately for the world, Chris doesn’t practice law anymore due to “mental infirmity or illness.”

Woman Sues Google Maps Over Wrong Walking Directions

Well, we are no one to deny the veracity of Winston Churchill’s wisdom when he says, “The greatest lesson in life is to know that even fools are right sometimes.” How would you correlate one’s sagacity to something like suing Google Maps for not fetching her right directions?

Los Angeles based Lauren Rosenberg did not find “safe route” recommended by Google Maps any safer and eventually, bumped into a car to suffer physical injuries – mental and emotional as well…? While following Google Maps’s directions on her BlackBerry, Lauren found herself on a four-lane highway without sidewalks, which obviously was not safe to walk at all. According to her lawyer, Google should have warned his client of the path she was taking and its dangers as well.

Inmate Files a $5 Million Lawsuit Against HIMSELF

Frivolity knows no bounds, so does the claimed ingenuity. As LoweringTheBar.net narrates it, Robert Lee Brock, an inmate at the Indian Creek Correctional Center in Chesapeake, Virginia, was so depressed with his arrest that he sued himself for violating his own civil rights. The story does not end here. Since he was a ward of the state, he asked the state to pay $5 million on his behalf. Finding no substance in his prattle, the judge dismissed the lawsuit because of its frivolity and intent to mislead the state.

Shaky ‘Resemblance’ to Michael Jordan Turns Into $832 Million Lawsuit

Allen Heckard did considerably well to include charges like defamation, permanent injury, emotional pain and suffering to make his case stronger when filing $832 million lawsuit against Michael Jordan and Nike. According to Allen, his semblance to the American former professional basketball player has become a perpetual source of agony to him. He sued Nike coz the brand makes Jordan what he is right now.

Floridian Sues Nightclub Topless Dancer For Whiplashing With Breasts

Absurd? While we absolutely rhyme with you on this, Paul Shimkonis, the 38-year old physical therapist, doesn’t and he actually filed a lawsuit against Tawny Peaks, a 38-year-old topless dancer, working for Diamond Dolls nightclub in Florida. According to Paul, the buxom topless dancer flung her 69-HH breasts in his face during a bachelor party, which caused him bodily injury, suffering, pain and disability. The judge, however, dismissed the $15,000 lawsuit while saying that breasts never caused any serious damage to Paul Shimkonis.

Karl Kemp & Associates Sues Vagrants for $1 Million

Now that makes some sense to business-minded folks; nonetheless, for others, it’s yet another case of stupidity at its best. In the year 2007, Karl Kemp & Associates sued a crew of vagabonds for a hefty sum of $1 million (because homeless people are rich, duh)claiming those homeless people were scaring away its customers. The Madison Avenue antiques dealer further argued that unsanitary living conditions of those individuals might cause problems to others.

Israeli Woman Sues Weather Station Guy for Stormy Day Prediction

Danny Rup, the Channel 2 weather forecaster would have never thought that his weather forecast would not provide him with a clear picture of his future. A Haifa based flu patient actually went on to sue Rup for misinforming her about the day’s weather. Had she won the $1,000 lawsuit, the amount would have compensated her for her health, four days’ of absence from work, and $38 incurred on medications, aside from mental stress she went through the entire episode.

Sued For Silence – Copyright Infringement

Even silence could cause one to infringe others’ creativity. It actually happened when music publishers of the late John Cage filed a lawsuit against musician Mike Batt for reproducing a silent musical piece. Since the silence track in Cage’s album was copyrighted, Batt had to settle the strange plagiarism dispute by paying a huge, six-figure sum.

Rapist Sues Hospital for Its Inability to Protect Patients

It cannot get any worse than this for sure. Edward Brewer, a convicted rapist, sued the hospital authorities for not protecting the inmates from sexual assault. The person in question asked for $2 million in damages. According to him, hospital’s negligence allowed him to rape a patient in her bed, which resulted in his 10 year prison sentence. The rape victim died four months later.

Homeless Grownup Sues Parents for Neglect, Indifference

C’mon, would anyone in his thirties do this to his parents? Bernard Bey, however, considers it fair enough to drag his parents to court of law for neglecting his financial needs even when he is 32. The Brooklyn homeless actually asked for $200,000 allowance to help him open two Domino’s Pizza franchises. His parents want him to get himself a job and raise the funds for his project of his own. Quite justified, right?

Some people seem to be ready to file lawsuits at the drop of a hat. The litigious may cause a truckload of problems, but the antics sometimes do leave room for hilarity.

Image: Brian Turner on Flickr