JOE meets Aidan Turner, the Irish star of The Hobbit: The Battle Of The Five Armies

YOU SHALL NOT PASS... without reading this interview.

You know it’s truly Christmas time when satsuma sales surge in the shops, your mam pre-orders 38 bottles of white wine for Aunty Moira at the family party, and Peter Jackson releases another Middle-Earth movie.

The Hobbit: The Battle Of The Five Armies is in Irish cinemas now and, following on from the end of The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug , the latest film sees Thorin Oakenshield (Richard Armitage) and his company of courageous dwarves, including Irish actor Aidan Turner as Kili, defend their newly-reclaimed homeland of Erebor from the scaly grasp of the charmingly villainous dragon, Smaug ( Bendyballs Cabbagepatch Buttermilk Crumplehorn Benedict Cumberbatch).

They are accompanied by our plucky titular hobbit, Bilbo ‘the Burglar’ Baggins (an impeccably cast Martin Freeman), who is in possession of the One Ring and who, along with the rest of the company, is forced to engage in a war against an array of evil Middle-Earth combatants.

Just imagine the big news team fight at the end of Anchorman and you'll start to get the idea… except that this one includes way more deadly dwarves, loads of nasty orcses, and a whole lot less Tim Robbins.

To celebrate the film's release, we sent Fellowship fan Eoghan Doherty along to meet Aidan Turner to chat about the final installment in Peter Jackson's epic trilogy, weird and wonderful dwarf grooming habits, and about getting pissed with some guy called Ed Sheeran.

Enjoy the interview, we certainly did...

JOE: Hi Aidan, thanks for chatting to us today and congratulations on the film. We're big fans of the Lord Of The Rings and Hobbit films in JOE and really enjoyed The Battle Of The Five Armies. Have you had a chance to see the film yourself yet?

Aidan: I did, yes. I saw it in Leicester Square a few days before the Dublin premiere and that was my first time seeing it. And of course it’s been so long since we shot it, so you kind of think "what’s left in the movie? What’s Peter cut out with your own character, with other story lines, with other sub plots?" and stuff like that.

Seeing it kind of felt like it was very much for the first time, even though we do ADR (Automated Dialogue Replacement) and we see it in the studio and we do different stages, but I was thrilled. It’s a great way to finish. It’s super exciting, it’s epic. There’s a great pace to the film and I’m delighted. It just really, really works.

My character kind of shines in it too and I think the relationship with the Tauriel (played by Evangeline Lilly) character really works. It was something I was a little bit worried about when the script pages were coming in. I was thinking "Oh God, because this isn’t in the book. How are the fans going to react to something like this? Are they going to go on all-out attack and, if they do, this has got to be good and it’s got to work, it’s got to fly."

It does, so I’m really proud and it’s a nice way to see off the final film, the final trilogy.

JOE: It certainly is a great way to round off the trilogy. You mentioned the character of Tauriel, your love interest. You obviously got to spend a lot of intimate time with Evangeline Lilly on set. How tough was that for you?

A: Oh, impossibly hard. I mean, I just couldn’t make the love thing work. She just wasn’t physically attractive enough for me so obviously you can imagine that was quite difficult.

No, she was amazing. She was lovely, she’s brilliant. It was so much fun and just nice to not be around the dwarves and beardy men. It was nice to have a beautiful woman on set and a storyline that we really believed in and really thought that we could execute well. It was fun. Nice not to have all that testosterone.

JOE: Did you get a chance to ask her just what the hell happened at the end of Lost?

A: I’ve never seen Lost so I wouldn’t know. I never watched it.

JOE: Had she watched your own TV show, Being Human? Was it reciprocal?

A: I don’t know if she had actually, I never asked her.

JOE: You should swap DVDs for Christmas, put those wrongs to right...

A: Yeah, we should have done that on the first day actually. Why, what did happen in Lost? Was there an earthquake or something? Was that the thing?

JOE: It was mental. We can’t even get into it now, we'd another few interviews just to try and explain the whole thing...

When actors sign up for any project, you obviously want to be proud of it when you've completed it, but it must be especially amazing to take part in something as MASSIVE as a film trilogy by Peter Jackson and to come out the other end saying how much you loved it.

Plus, it can't to hurt to have it on the ol' CV too, right?

A: Yeah, it’s pretty amazing and there was a sense of relief too that you’re not just buried in the film and that you are actually proud of the work you did. You don’t cringe every time you get up on screen, which is something a lot of actors do quite a lot anyway.

Looking at it now I’m proud. To have that, no matter what I do for the rest of my career, it will be successful.

JOE: Sorry to break this to you Aidan, but it’s all downhill from here...

A: (Laughs) It’s going to be a box set that I will be proud of for a long time. It’ll be around for a long time, certainly.

JOE: Did you always know that Kili was going to get such a prominent role in this particular film?

There's a huge company of dwarves and there are so many additional characters involved, but did Peter sit you down and say “Listen Aidan, in the final installment, your character is going to be pushed right to the forefront?”

A: No, not at all. Nothing was ever mentioned.

We would shoot a lot of stuff that wouldn’t even make the extras or the extended cut of the DVD. You don’t know what’s going to be left in and what’s going to be pulled out, who he’s going to favour in particular scenes, because you just shoot the hell out of everything, from every different angle. Everybody gets close-ups so you don’t know which way it’s going to go. That’s all at a later stage when they try to figure stuff out.

So it was quite a welcome surprise. God, I’m actually in this more than I thought I would be. It’s fun. You’re there with your family and your friends and it’s a nervy time as well because you can sit down with the film and you’ve spent two or three years in this countries shooting these films and then to not be in it could be slightly embarrassing, so I’m glad I managed to skirt past all that and just be proud.

So no, I didn’t know that Pete was going to make a thing, or have that love story. That was all new to me when I got over there and it was good. I came out of it OK.

JOE: As soon as you saw it you should have got straight on the phone to your agent and said "we should have charged way more! We get so much screen time in the last one! Goddamnit!"

It's actually been a few years since you finished all of the filming, so how easy is it to get back into the Hobbit frame of mind?

A: It takes a little bit of time actually.

With every interview you’re reminded of other anecdotes or other bits of the story, or what season it was when you were shooting it in New Zealand, whether something was on location or what location it actually was. You’re informed as you go along but it does take a little while.

I remember the first year we did press was a lot easier, for obvious reasons. It was a lot closer to the time you had wrapped, but we had all done our homework a bit more and we had just finished shooting. We were still a family and now, it’s still amazing to see everybody at the premieres and hang out, but a lot of distance has passed and we’ve all gone on and done other things.

We’re a little bit rusty when it comes to Middle-Earth, but it’s fun to revisit, to reminisce and to remember the fun times on the shoot. It was epic and incredible and those memories are going to be with me for a long time… if I don’t forget them.

JOE: Speaking of anecdotes, was there anybody in the cast who you found particularly funny or entertaining?

A: Billy Connolly was hilarious but that’s natural enough, that’s understandable. Martin Freeman is a riot all of the time because it’s self-preservation as well, you just have to survive on set sometimes.

That sounds very dramatic but when you’re day-in day-out doing it – you have 4am pick-up in the morning, you get to set at 1pm and you work until 7pm or 8pm. It’s a long day and you’re on set with these guys all the time and sometimes people are quite focused, sometimes they’re out to lunch in their head all day.

You have to keep spirits and moral high and it is just chatting, just joking around and messing around.

Stephen Hunter who played Bombur was ridiculous all the time because he just looked so funny. To the very last day I was saying to Nesbitt (Irish actor James Nesbitt, who plays Bofur), and he said the same thing, he was hilarious even just to look at. He’s so big and he’s grotesque, but he’s cute and he’s funny.

I wish he was in it more. I wish some of the characters were in it more. You can wish all you like but there just isn’t time sometimes. But yeah, there was a lot of fun, a lot of jokes.

JOE: We were hoping that Martin Freeman might have done a few of his lines from The Office like “you’re a c*ck, you’re a c*ck, you’re a c*ck.” Just drop things like that into parts of the conversation.

Clip via TrustThe7s.

A: (Laughs) He didn't say that but I think he’s very proud of his work on The Office and, when you’re walking around town with him, you will get a lot of “Alright Tim!” You hear that a lot and he’s like “Yeah, OK, fine.”

JOE: Going back to when you got involved with The Hobbit originally, was it Peter Jackson who phoned you or did you just think it was a friend putting on a dodgy Kiwi accent to prank you?

A: (Laughs, pretends to be on the phone) "Right, it's Peter Jackson, sure."

No, not really. It was actually just a boring actor thing where you go in and meet a Casting Director in London - John and Ros Hubbard, Irish guys. They put me on tape, Peter responded to the tape and called me back a month later. I met him in the same place in London and we just had an hour where we were just reading through some scenes and talking.

When I walked into the room he said “I like your show, your vampire show. It’s pretty good.” And I said "Oh God, thanks" and thought "right, so he’s aware of me, he’s seen me do things."

I thought "I've f*ckin’ nailed it. It’s there. It’s in the bag." Then he said “So have you read the book?” And I went, "ah shit, I haven’t read it."

Now what do I say to the guy? You could read this book in a few hours. But I was honest, so I said "no, I haven’t" and he said “OK, well I better tell you what it’s all about then.”

So he just proceeded to tell me over the next hour what the whole thing was about, read bits out and ran some scenes. So I kind of knew but I didn’t get the official offer until about six weeks later, but I knew walking out. I was like, "I think I have this. I’ve come pretty close anyway, as close as I’m ever going to get to anything."

JOE: You're not a small man yourself but, in terms of getting into character originally, did you have any particular techniques? Did you start wearing kids' clothes and eating smaller portions?

A: Yeah, I would hold really small mugs...

JOE: I thought so, and did you start going to the toilet in the bath, just to get the size of things relative?

A: (Laughs) Yeah, in order to get the scale just right.

A lot of the training, getting into character and finding the character was all done through bootcamp. We were so lucky to have six weeks of intense training and bonding as a group where we would read the script, train together and do 'dwarf movement' classes.

JOE: 'Dwarf movement' classes? Are they like antenatal pregnancy classes? I didn't know you could get 'dwarf movement' classes.

A: Yeah, kind of like antenatal classes, but with a lower sense of gravity. We were all walking like pregnant women for a while but we actually ditched it in the end. I don’t think Peter liked it. After the six weeks he said “this isn’t working at all.”

JOE: Everybody was just awkwardly waddling around on set...

A: Yeah, it was a bit of a waddle. We didn’t look powerful at all. So it was horse riding, hand-to-hand combat, sword fighting, archery, all those kind of things. That was how a lot of us found the centre of the character and it just gave us a heads up on what we would be doing for the next two years. We needed all that training, we needed to keep fit.

It was a pretty relentless kind of job with regards to the physical aspect to the whole thing. It was full on. Fairly early on in those six weeks, Peter shows you initial drafts - because you don’t know what your character is going to look like - so he shows you the drawings and sketches of what your character will look like. These are very exciting moments.

You find out what type of weapons you’re going to have, you speak to the guys at Weta Workshop and it’s a real collaboration. It certainly feels like a real collaboration. I’m sure if you said "no, I don’t like that at all" then they would probably change it, but you’re just like "Oh my God, that’s amazing, I love it. What do you think of this leather over this bit or this kind of sword?"

It’s just amazing. There’s so much to take in. That was all in the early six weeks and if we didn’t have that time I think it would have been quite difficult to hit the ground running over there, but we had all that time to bond. It was important.

JOE: So, what you’re saying is that you didn’t go to the toilet in the bath then?

A: Not in character anyway. At the weekend I’m sure it would have happened several times.

JOE: You mentioned Weta Workshop who have designed all of the incredible props for the Lord Of The Rings and Hobbit films, did you get to keep anything yourself from the set?

A: Yeah! Weta actually sent over my bow and arrow which is pretty special. I must get it framed or do something with it. There’s little bits that we got too... I nicked some gold from the set.

JOE: Well that was the next question, did you nick anything?

A: Yeah! I put the gold down my boot! I put a handful down there. I came home with fifteen pieces of gold.

I have one piece left in the house and then we did the Berlin premiere last year and they gave us a piece of gold with the Berlin Hobbit premiere stamp, which is quite special, but having a piece from the set was quite important. I thought Kili was the kind of guy who would just stuff loads of things down his boot.

JOE: He would, he’s a chancer...

A: Definitely! I thought that if I got caught I would just tell Peter I’m in character or something stupid and I’d get away with it, but yeah, I did do that.

JOE: "I was in character" - the perfect excuse.

You mentioned that you were shown the concept art and the look of the characters early on and, whenever you’re watching the film you are struck by the incredibly ornate design of both the facial hair on the dwarves and the hair on their heads. To be fair Aidan, your hairstyle is quite tame compared to a lot of them, like a mini-Aragorn.

Were you a little bit disappointed that you didn’t get to show off a big fancy handlebar moustache?

A: (Laughs) No, I dodged the bullet there!

Can you imagine that nonsense at lunch time, trying to navigate your spoon around these horrible beards? I got out of it very easily. I only had a tiny prosthetic nose.

Almost every other actor, with the exception of Fili, had prosthetics all over - nose, foreheard, some of them even more so than that. And the beards were horrible. The guys couldn’t talk half the time. When they would, the beards would get caught. It just never seemed to work really.

It looked amazing on these guys, it worked for the show, it needed to be there and the departments did an amazing job, but it just never seemed right that Kili had them. We did try the prosthetics in the early days and actually, if you look at the first movie in Bag End, you can see certain scenes with quick clips of Kili with prosthetics on and it does look quite odd. It just never seemed to look right, it just aged him and it just made him look a bit odd. My face just didn’t work for the prosthetics at all so then we just went back to a little nose.

So short answer, no I felt quite relieved that I didn’t have to do the big make-up thing.

JOE: This isn’t a prosthetic beard that you’re wearing right now, is it?

A: No, I grew this myself. That’s the real deal.

JOE: Fair play. In terms of the other dwarves, and we tested Richard Armitage (who plays the Dwarf King Thorin) on this as well, can you name the entire company?

A: Oh, it’s been a while, a year... we’ll see how it goes. Ori, Nori, Dori, Bifur, Bofur, Bombur, Dwalin, Thorin, Fili, Kili, Balin.

JOE: That's almost everybody...

A: I thought that was all of them! Fili, Kili, Bifur, Bofur, Bombur, Ori, Nori, Dori, Balin, Dwalin, Thorin, Fili, Kili. Is that them all?

JOE: There are two more. Gl...

A: Gloin and Oin! Damn it. How could I forget? Shit. (Laughs) I’m a bit disappointed. I thought I could do them all.

JOE: You did better than me anyway. Now, Aidan, you can probably tell that I wrote a lot of these questions while sitting on the toilet. What do you like to read whenever you’re sitting on the toilet?

A: What am I reading right now on the toilet? Tom Rob Smith is what I’m reading. No, I’m finished that actually. What am I reading?

JOE: The Hobbit?

A: (Laughs) No, Christopher Hitchens' 'Hitch-22.' I’m re-reading it, it’s his biography. I’m quite a big fan of Christopher Hitchens so because I’ve read it already it’s now moved into the bathroom.

JOE: So it’s been elevated to bathroom status now...

The company of dwarves certainly are fond of singing a few tunes now and then but what would be your own karaoke song of choice?

A: I'm not one for singing really, but maybe something by the Dubliners. If I can’t sing I tend to go into verse and then into rhythm so 'Rocky Road To Dublin' is always a good one. It’s all about the rhythm and tempo, not getting out of breath and all of those horrible things.

JOE: Yeah, hitting the notes properly is overrated... You were singing with Ed Sheeran though recently, right?

A: Yeah, I saw him play and then we met during the course of all of The Hobbit stuff last year...

JOE: Of course, because he recorded one of the songs for The Hobbit: The Desolation Of Smaug, 'I See Fire.'

A: He did and we hung out quite a bit. We got on and we got friendly and then he invited me to see him in Belfast a few weeks ago. I went up to see him and he was great. We hung out, had a great old time and then the other night we got really pissed and went back to his house and I got drunk and made him sing songs and serenade me with music.

JOE: That sounds like great craic. And then did you make him listen to your rendition of 'Rocky Road To Dublin?'

A: (Laughs) He said he had to go to bed before I could. And I said "why, what are you doing tomorrow?" He told me, "I’m playing this Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show thing" and I was like, "Oh. The you'd better get some sleep."

JOE: Well, he certainly looked delighted at that event. He had a big smile on his face.

A: Yeah, he was quite hungover I think!

JOE: One final dilemma that we ask all of our interviewees, would you rather fight one horse-sized duck or one hundred duck-sized horses?

A: Oh, it would definitely be the duck-sized horses. Horses are a flighty animal, they’re going to run away. I wouldn’t fancy meeting a massive big duck though. He could be aggressive and weird.

JOE: An aggressive, weird, big duck would be terrifying. Sure a normal sized-duck is aggressive at the best of times...

A: Yeah, and swans – I wouldn’t go near them either.

JOE: So definitely the horses then? You’re right, they certainly are a flighty creature...

A: Yeah, I think that if you stamped your foot loud enough they’d all just all scatter straight away and run off. Easy. You couldn't do that with the duck.

JOE: That's true. You're back in Ireland for Christmas, that’s got to be nice feeling, coming home after all of your travels for the filming and press?

A: Yeah, it’s great. It’s amazing. It seems like it’s been a while since I’ve been properly home so it’s lovely. I’m doing a film with Jim Sheridan in January (The Secret Scripture) so that will keep me here for a bit longer, which will be nice. I’ll get to hang out with my friends and family so yeah, it’s cool. I feel chilled now for the first time in a long time. It’s nice.

JOE: There’s a nice Christmassy feel about the place as well but, in terms of Christmas dinner... Brussels sprouts or no Brussels sprouts?

A: Oh I love Brussels sprouts. I'm a big fan of those.

JOE: Right, because my next question was going to be how do you successfully hide your Brussels sprouts on Christmas Day?

A: Oh I don't need to hide them. I eat everything. There is no food I don’t like.

JOE: Well on that food note, we'll leave you to get your dinner. Thanks again for chatting to us Aidan, congratulations on the film and the very best of luck with everything in the future.

A: No problem, thanks!

Aidan Turner stars in The Hobbit: The Battle Of The Five Armies which is in Irish cinemas right now. So what are you waiting for? Go and see it! Here's the terrific trailer to get you in the mood...

Clip via Warner Bros. Pictures.