Image: CNN Gif: Nicholas Stango

A little over a week ago, Ted Cruz’s daughters managed to tolerate their father’s presence for an entire hour while being interviewed on CNN. But being rendered temporarily blind and deaf by Ted’s soup admission, we seem to have missed the night’s (other) big reveal: Multiple copies exist of a video of Ted Cruz dressed as, I guess, a princess, maybe? And friends, readers, countrymen, we want that video.



[There was a video here]

Cruz begins by telling Anderson Cooper a fun little story about playing dress up with his daughters. This was a mistake. “More than once, they have put every one of their hair ribbons all over Daddy—we don’t allow photographs of that. That is a rule,” he says, correctly anticipating that, yes, of course his daughters will betray him at the first possible opportunity.

Foolishly, Cruz goes on, “And indeed, just—what, a couple of days ago. I was back for Caroline’s daddy-daughter picnic at school. Which featured all the dads running and playing games, and—”

“My favorite,” Caroline interjects gleefully.

Ted nods, “Your favorite was that she got to dress up daddy in like this pink boa and these like, big goofy looking underwear.”

Caroline, take it away: “And that was on a video tape the whole time.”

Heidi tries and fails to shut her daughter up.

And that was on a video tape the whole time.



“Uh oh,” Cruz says, struggling to smile. Caroline mercifully continues, “And now it’s a class video that they’re sending out to all the parents.”

Caroline—sweet, sweet Caroline. Thank you for this gift.



Do you have children that go to school with Ted Cruz’s daughter? And did you receive this video containing a clip of Ted Cruz looking his best? If so, we’re willing to pay cold, hard cash to get our hands on it.

You can email me here if you have what we’re looking for. Let’s chat.

And Caroline, if you’re reading this, please feel free to send anything else you’ve got our way. As far as I can tell, we’re on the same team.