FLAGSTAFF, AZ—Noting that the middle-aged individual walked in, dropped his towel, and began making small talk with those around him, sources confirmed Wednesday that a man at Core Fitness Center appeared to have absolutely no qualms about standing around naked in front of everyone in spin class. “That guy sure is taking his sweet-ass time getting dressed right there in the middle of the spinning room,” said gym member Jeremy Kirsch, 27, who added that while the man had finally managed to put a pair of socks on, he was still almost entirely nude as he took a seat on the stationary bike and attempted to engage others in conversation. “I’m glad he’s comfortable with his own body and everything, but I come to spin class to get a workout, not to look at some old dude’s junk. My God, he keeps talking to people as if his dick weren’t hanging out right there where everybody can see it.” At press time, the naked man was reportedly discussing the best way to get a good hamstring stretch and had put his leg up on the spin bike’s handlebars to demonstrate.

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