((parody of this))

Singers: Doggo, Dogamy, Dogaressa, Sans

(All)

* We are the sentries who don’t do anything

* We just sit here and lie around

* And if you ask us to do anything

* We’ll just tell you

* We don’t do anything!

(Doggo)

* Well I’ve never seen a human

* And I’ve never seen a monster

* And–I’m pretty sure there’s nothing that I’ve ever seen at all

(Dogamy and Dogaressa)

* And we’ve never nabbed a red soul

* (And we’ve never smelled a green scent)

* And we never report to Undyne at all!

(All)

* ‘Cause we’re the sentries who don’t do anything

* We just sit here and lie around

* And if you ask us to do anything

* We’ll just tell you

* We don’t do anything!

(Sans)

* well i’ve never manned my station

* and i don’t patrol the forest

* and i’ve never not told knock-knock jokes while by the ruins wall

* and i’ve never missed a lunch break

* and i never make good puzzles

* and i never report to undyne at all

(All)

* ‘Cause we’re the sentries who don’t do anything

* We just sit here and lie around

* And if you ask us to do anything

* We’ll just tell you

* We don’t do anything!

(Papyrus)

WELL I ALWAYS MAKE NEW PUZZLES

AND I DO RECALIBRATIONS

AND I ALWAYS LOOK FOR HUMANS WHETHER THEY BE BIG OR SMALL

AND I ALWAYS WAKE UP EARLY

AND I SOMETIMES MAN MY STATION

AND I NEVER FAIL TO REPORT TO UNDYNE AT ALL!

(Spoken)

* bro.

YES BROTHER?

* i think you’re missing the point.

HOW SO?

* this is a song about laziness.

* That’s right!! Can’t you see you’re messing this up??

YOU ALL SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELVES!

* We’re just having a bit of fun!

(* Just something for a laugh!)

I FIND NOTHING FUNNY ABOUT THIS! SENTRY DUTY IS A SERIOUS MATTER!

* c’mon papyrus, when do we ever get the chance to sing like this?

ALL THE TIME, BECAUSE YOU NEVER DO YOUR JOB!

* fair enough.

* can we at least finish the song?

* Please??

* Please?

(* Please?)

ALL RIGHT, FINE!

…

ONLY IF I GET TO SING THE FINAL VERSE.

* go for it.

(Papyrus)

AND I MADE A GAUNTLET OF TERROR

AND I PAINT TREACHEROUS BRIDGES

AND I’VE TURNED MY SHED INTO A CAGE WITH BARS SO BIG AND TALL

AND I ALWAYS TRAIN WITH UNDYNE

AND I ALWAYS PRACTICE MAGIC

(Spoken)

* good job, bro.

(All)

* And we never report to Undyne at all!

(Spoken)

YOU’RE ALL A BUNCH OF LAZYBONES!

* we love you too, papyrus.

* BARK!