CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | Contact

After being pressed by friends visiting from out of town, Yeronga man Nathan Gravatt has today been forced to admit that he has actually jumped off jetty and swum in the Brisbane River, on multiple occasions.

Nathan says it’s not something he’s necessarily proud of, and understands that he could have gotten very sick – but after a few tins it can be an absolute pissa.

He also says he has mates that do it all the time.

“If you get out near the mouth or back up past the Uni it’s pretty blue.. But yeah, not something you wanna make a habit of”

“Some of my mates with boats do it all the time. Fuck that, you know you they’ve spotted bull sharks in there. Someone even said tiger sharks”

While his mates query him on why the fuck the Brisbane River looks like a third world estuary one would expect to find in South-East Asia, Nathan begins to rub his hands across his arms wondering what he caught have caught during drunken bomb dives.

“It’s too hard to keep clean with all the bends in it” he says.

“Like they used to try. But the CityCats get in the way. Plus most of the rubbish just gets caught in the mangroves so it’s not like it’s actually in the river”