Inb4 that sounds like it turned out to be an unsafe sale.

eBay seller jameslabrecque (aka James Labrecque) recently sold this locked floor safe on eBay believing it was empty. But it was not. The buyer opened it and found over $26,000. Now James is wishing his legs were limber enough to kick himself in the nuts. Per the eBay ad:

WHAT YOU SEE IS WHAT YOU GET. NOTHING MORE AND NOTHING LESS.

HERE IS A MAJOR FLOOR OR IN GROUND SAFE. IT LOOKS LIKE TO BE A 7" DOOR MEASURED ACROSS. IT IS A COMBINATION LOCK UNIT... I DID NOT GET THE COMBINATION FOR THE UNIT .SO YOU WILL HAVE TO CONTACT THE MAJOR SAFE COMPANY TO GET THE COMBINATION OR FIND SOMEONE THAT CAN OPEN THE UNIT UP./ RETURNS: THERE ARE NO RETURNS. ALL MERCHANDISE SOLD AS IS. PLEASE DO NOT ASK US TO REFUND YOUR MONEY.

AHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH @ "please do not ask us to refund your money". Because you know what James did? Contacted the buyer after the story came out and asked for half of what was inside! Unsurprisingly, the buyer decided to not share. "HA -- you must be out of your f***ing mind" I imagine they said before running out and buying a Jet Ski.

'Stupidest idiot' eBayer sells safe with $26K inside [msnbc]

and

eBay Auction

Thanks to Evil Ares, who's so evil he puts a curse on everything he sells on eBay before shipping it. Oh you're bad!