Facebook, CNN, Weekend Update… fake news is all the rage these days. Right up there with wearing bathrobes outside of your house and firing your long-tenured, well-respected head coach.

In the spirit of phony journalism, we’ve uncovered a fake news story that has been circulating for each one of the National Hockey League’s 30 clubs.

The ranking order here is gospel, but pay close attention to the write-ups and make sure you don’t believe a single thing you read in this week’s NHL Power Rankings: Fake News Edition.