Watch out Justin Bieber. Ed the Sock is back at Canadian music station MuchMusic and no celebrity is safe from the acid-tongued, cigar-chomping hand puppet.

“Justin Bieber has given an entire generation of young girls someone to cringe in embarrassment at when they reach their mid-20s,” Ed, also known as Steven Kerzner, the guy behind the sock, told the Star. “The biggest challenge Bieber faces for career longevity is his audience entering puberty.”

Ouch. The grouchy sock returns to MuchMusic for the first time in seven years on March 13 and no surprise: it will be open season on celebrities.

On Toronto rapper Drake: “Being Jewish, he can recognize how close Drake is to dreck (a Yiddish word for poop),” says Ed.

And what about B.C. it girl Carly Rae Jepsen?

“She’s a talented singer and performer, which makes it hard to understand how she got so popular,” says the world’s most acerbic sock.

Before the imitators (remember Triumph, the Insult Comic Dog on Conan?) Ed the Sock ruled supreme.

Few TV hosts, much less ones that were created out of hosiery, had as much sway over Canadian pop culture as Ed, who commanded 14 seasons at CHUM, owners of City and MuchMusic before they were sold to new corporate masters Bell Media.

For one thing, no one could quite take the mustard out of his subjects like the gravelly voiced puppet. If the X-rated mind of Howard Stern and the biting sarcasm of Jon Stewart were ever to meld at, say, a Tim Hortons you would get Ed. Ed has always been a counterpoint to the tightly scripted messages put out by celebrities, whose public relations bubbles are more puncture-proof today, and the fawning of TV hosts.

Ed was created in the late 1980s by Kerzner, who was the program director at independent cable company Newton Cable in North York.

Kerzner made Ed from items he found in the craft drawer at the station. He was a combination of a “friend’s dad, Oscar the Grouch and Jack Klugman from The Odd Couple,” says Kerzner.

When Newton was swallowed up by Rogers Cable, Kerzner took his act to City, where he gained a cult following with Fromage: his satiric deconstructions of music videos that ended in 2006. That was the precurser to Video on Trial at MuchMusic, where Kerzner will debut on Wednesday. On City (now owned by Rogers), Kerzner is most remembered for Ed’s Night Party, where he and wife and co-host Liana K interviewed everyone from movie to porn stars.

After Rogers acquired City from CTV, Kerzner’s hot-tub “Girls Gone Wild” take on the late night talk show format didn’t quite fit the corporate mould.

Ed’s Night Party was cancelled in 2008.

Kerzner maintains there was “never any bad blood. I remained in touch with all my old contacts over the years. In this case they invited me back.”

The MuchMusic episode, which airs at 8:30 p.m. Wednesday, has a 90s theme. Ed will be one of the panellists critiquing music videos.

It’s not a regular gig, but for some viewers it will be a welcome return.

“The thing about Ed is that he has tremendous licence to say things and explore things that a human host can’t do. It’s the same way The Simpsons can explore subjects that regular sitcoms can’t. Ed can speak the truth in a way that people normally don’t do,” says Kerzner.

It starts with being angry. Ed, who seems to have a perma-sneer on his face, seems perennially outraged.

“He’s angry because he’s smart and it’s a reaction to the idiocy around us. It’s that dumbing down of North America without a break,” says Kerzner. “The media dumbs things down. But the youth audience are more aware than any previous generation. Ed has a tremendous bulls--- filter and he knows that viewers hate being talked to like idiots.”

While Ed left City and MuchMusic, he never left the TV spotlight. He can still be seen weekly on Hamilton’s CHCH TV in I Hate Hollywood. But his Much gig has the potential to reach a nationwide audience.

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Video on Trial ranks as the No. 2 show for viewers 12 to 34 for MuchMusic and will likely expose Ed to a whole new generation, said Mary Costa, a spokesperson at MuchMusic.

“Ed will be doing what Ed does best: making fun of celebrity.”

Before he departs, Ed can’t resist one more stab at Bieber: “I don’t know how to fairly rate Justin Bieber’s singing, but his Auto-Tune is first rate,” he deadpans.

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