A Melbourne researcher says excessive focus on self-esteem is turning children into narcissistic bullies.

RMIT psychology lecturer Professor Helen McGrath works with the Alannah and Madeleine anti-violence foundation and has been heavily involved in shaping anti-bullying frameworks in Victorian schools.

She says a review of international studies debunks the notion that bullies have low self-esteem.

"Many of the children who are involved in bullying as ringleaders actually have inflated views of themselves," she said.

"They have very, very high self-esteem.

"This is quite surprising to most people who think that sometimes those kids who bully might have low self-esteem. It's quite the opposite."

Professor McGrath says the increased focus on children's self-esteem is producing young people who are narcissistic and low on empathy.

"We're finding from other studies that the over-focus on self-esteem over the last 30 years has produced perhaps more young people who are low in empathy and high in narcissism," she said.

"What we believe has happened is over the last 30 years the very strong emphasis on enhancing self-esteem that has been picked up by both schools and families has contributed to a lot of young people having a strong sense of their own specialness, a sense of entitlement.

"And they believe the view that basically they are special and unique and can do anything."

Professor McGrath says parents' attempts to shield their children from harm may have unwittingly contributed to the unhealthy behaviours.

"It derives from a concern of very loving parents that their child may lack confidence if they don't have their self-esteem enhanced," she said.

"So they will tell them that everything they do is wonderful and protect them from negative situations where they may have to deal with some challenges that may make them sad or worried or upset.

"And the reality of course is that we grow as people from meeting those challenges."

But Professor McGrath says parents should not feel guilty for following what has been the accepted practice in parenting.

"Parents have been following the advice that's come out of research parties for many years, it's just that after 30 years the research now says that wasn't successful," she said.

She says parents instead need to teach their children about self-worth as opposed to self-esteem.

"[We want parents to] continue to love their children as they always have, and to teach the children well, as they always have," she said.

"But to just shift the focus away from self-esteem, which is more about what you've got and who you are, over to self-respect, which is being able to say: 'I'm a good person, I treat other people well, I'm pleased when I succeed at things, but I'm humble about it, not superior, and I accept myself with all my limitations and I can deal with life'."