Microsoft Unveils CloudsXP

By Jayson Freece – Daily Burlesque 7/6/2011

Redmond, WA – Microsoft Corp (MS) announced on Tuesday that it would soon be launching a new cloud based service similar to the one Apple, Inc. announced on 6/6/2011 at it’s World Wide Developer Conference. Microsoft CEO, Steve Ballmer, speaking to reporters following the press conference announcing Microsoft’s CloudsXP, was uncharacteristically blunt in his reasons for unveiling the service while Apple’s WWDC is still in session. “In the past we really didn’t take Apple all that seriously, but then I joined MobileMe and quickly realized that Apple was probably not a one trick pony.” Ballmer said that unlike previous projects at Microsoft, he was actually “really involved in the development” of this new service, and that he actually picked out the name as well as the icon. Ballmer was also very excited about some of the “revolutionary” services that CloudsXP will be providing, “Not only will our service do everything that Apple’s does” said Ballmer “But, we’ll also throw in a Zune, a Kin and a Stevie Ballz signed bobble-head for the first 2 million people to sign up!” When asked by reporters who Stevie Ballz was, Ballmer responded with a loud grunt and then promptly ripped off his “entertainer” pants and began to poll dance for the crowd of 26 people who had assembled for the announcement.