Real Housewives of Orange County alum Gretchen Rossi has opened up about her desperate battle to have children and the tearful nights that have left her and fiancé Slade Smiley on the brink of separation.

In an exclusive interview with DailyMailTV, Rossi, 39, and Slade Smiley, 44, reveal they have started a new round of IVF treatment in a last ditch bid to have children.

The couple said they considered breaking up over their difficulty having children after going through one unsuccessful round of IVF and reversing Smiley's vasectomy to no avail.

But Rossi says she is hopeful starting her new treatment and Smiley believes the couple is 'destined' to have a baby girl.

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Gretchen Rossi, 39, almost ended her nine-year relationship with fiance Slade Smiley, 44, over their struggles to have children, she exclusively told DailyMailTV

The Real Housewives of Orange County alum said they have been trying for a child for four years, going through IVF and reversing Smiley's vasectomy. Now they have started a new round of IVF in a last ditch bid to have children

'The journey for me of not being able to get pregnant naturally was a very difficult one,' Rossi said.

'It's similar to a death almost. Ever since you're a little girl, you have this vision of making love to your partner and being able to create this beautiful thing out of love.

'When all of a sudden that is taken away from you... It becomes so clinical and so impersonal.'

Rossi said that during her darkest moments she thought about breaking up with her partner of nine years.

'A lot of people don't talk about the lows. They don't talk about the moments where you're sitting in your bed crying at night, wishing and longing for something so badly with the person that you love,' she said.

'There were definitely days where I questioned, should I be with somebody who I can't have a biological child with?

'But through that pain it forced me to address those things, take a deep look at our relationship and realize that no matter what the outcome is, he is the one that I want to be with.'

Smiley added that he even offered to let her find someone who could give her a child.

'I love and care for Gretchen so much that there were times when I said well maybe we need to end this,' he said.

'I love you enough to let you go. If I'm not the person who's able to give you a child, the one thing you so desire in this world, I'm willing to end this relationship and let you go find it elsewhere. Those conversations happened.'

Rossi said that during her darkest moments she thought about breaking up with her partner of nine years. She added: 'There were definitely days where I questioned, should I be with somebody who I can't have a biological child with?'

The couple said they have been trying to get pregnant for four years. Their first attempt at IVF treatment ended in tragedy when 14 of their embryos failed before they were implanted.

'Slade had a vasectomy over 15 years ago and so when we first started this journey we thought IVF is our best option,' said Rossi.

'We went to IVF and sadly we lost 14 embryos during that process. That was a very emotionally, mentally, physically and financially draining journey that we went through.'

Eighteen months later, Smiley gave his fiancee a birthday surprise by reversing his vasectomy, but after a year they have still had no joy.

'Bless his heart he's gone through two different surgeries for me,' said Rossi.

'Unfortunately we found out about a year later that did not work. So it took us probably a couple of years to get back in the saddle and try IVF again.

'It was hard for me because I had some of my very best friends getting pregnant and a couple of them didn't even tell me because they knew how badly I wanted to have a baby.'

The couple even tried every quirky technique from eating frogs legs to acupuncture, trying to increase their chances of a pregnancy.

Rossi said after sex she would lift her legs up for 15 minutes, and Smiley quit wearing underwear to improve blood flow to his genitals.

'After he had his reversal, we tried everything,' said Rossi. 'We were told after you have intercourse you have to put your legs up for 15 minutes.

'I was super strict on my diet, what I was putting in my body. There were some crazy old wives tales that we heard. We were honestly willing and open to try anything.'

The blonde beauty said: 'It was hard for me because I had some of my very best friends getting pregnant and a couple of them didn't even tell me because they knew how badly I wanted to have a baby'. Pictured: Rossi breaking down on a RHOC reunion in 2015

The couple even tried every quirky technique from eating frogs legs to acupuncture, trying to increase their chances of a pregnancy. Rossi said after sex she would lift her legs up for 15 minutes, and Smiley quit wearing underwear to improve blood flow to his genitals

After weeks of research, Rossi said friends recommended Beverly Hills physician Dr Mark Surrey, a leading expert in fertility, and the couple found he was a perfect fit.

'Dr Surrey has really changed the scope of the way people perceive their ability to get pregnant under IVF,' said Smiley.

'There's new medications that are available, there's a procedure that's been changed. Every time we went out there, every single person recommended Dr Surrey.

'His staff, the way we're treated here, there's a level of comfort we've never truly felt. Making sure Gretchen is calm, there's no stress and she's in good hands goes a long way towards the success of the pregnancy as much as the meds and the technology.'

They are working with Dr Mark Surrey (pictured) at the Southern California Reproductive Center in Beverly Hills

DailyMailTV joined the Real Housewives vet at her first consultation and ultrasound at the Southern California Reproductive Center in Beverly Hills.

Rossi is being treated by Dr Surrey, co-founder and Medical Director at the center, who is one of America's top experts in the field of fertility and reproductive medicine, including reproductive surgery and in vitro fertilization (IVF).

DailyMailTV will follow Gretchen and Slade on their journey, revealing the ins and outs of their fertility treatments.

Rossi said quitting the hit reality show has put her in a better place to attempt a pregnancy again.

'I feel so much better both mentally and physically and I think that is partially due to getting rid of some of the toxicity in my life, i.e. Housewives, and a lot of the stuff that was going on in my life once before,' she said.

'I might not get pregnant and this might still not be the perfect time, but for some reason in the depths of my soul there's so many things that have aligned too perfectly.'

The couple added that they have put their wedding on hold until after the IVF treatment, and may not get married at all.

'We definitely have decided that the wedding's on hold until then,' said Rossi. 'All of these couples that have been together so long, the minute that they get married, they're getting divorced. Brad and Angelina, Jennifer and Justin – maybe we're going to be the new Kurt and Goldie or Oprah and Stedman.'

DailyMailTV will follow Gretchen and Slade on their journey, revealing the ins and outs of their fertility treatments as Rossi confessed that quitting the hit reality show has put her in a better place to attempt a pregnancy again

Dr Surrey told DailyMailTV his work will give Rossi a 70 percent chance of becoming pregnant as opposed to seven percent

Rossi continued: 'We've been together nine years, and we have a strong, wonderful relationship so we're happy with it.'

Dr Surrey told DailyMailTV his work will give Rossi a 70 percent chance of becoming pregnant as opposed to seven percent.

He said: 'Over the last couple of decades we specialized in reproductive medicine and surgery utilizing the latest in technology for both micro-endoscopic surgery as well as in vitro fertilization (IVF)...and some of this technology has enabled us to achieve very high success rates despite having patients who are older.

'We know that women's fertility will decline as they age. This is largely in the change of the genetic content of the eggs and therefore the embryos they produce.

'So by the time a lady is 40, most of the eggs she produces are not going to lead to a normal pregnancy.

'At age 40, we would expect that somewhere around 15 percent of structurally normal embryos are going to be genetically normal and are going to lead to an ongoing pregnancy.

'In a natural cycle the chances of a normal pregnancy are much lower than that, so if we do have a genetically normal embryo and in our lab transfer it, we have a 70 percent chance of achieving an ongoing pregnancy and this will compare favorably to a less than 7 percent chance in a natural cycle, so more than ten fold higher.'

The couple added that they have put their wedding on hold until after the IVF treatment, and may not get married at all

Rossi and Smiley are well aware of the complications that can come with having children.

Smiley has two boys from a previous relationship, and he revealed how life for his 17-year-old became a daily struggle after being diagnosed with brain cancer aged five.

'It's something him and his mother go through on a day to day basis,' said Smiley. 'It's full time nursing, he can't go to school.

'People come to the house to give him physical therapy. It's been an incredibly difficult and challenging thing to deal with.

'I've been told more than once that I lost my son, that he's not waking up from his last surgery. He's had 16 major brain surgeries. So it's a very emotional thing, all of this, to go through it.

'But I'm willing to accept that challenge. I know there may be difficult times in the future but I can't imagine going through it with anyone else but Gretchen.'