It's not lost on Zisin that they're quite young to be writing a memoir. The first line mentions their age, and when they were approached to write it – at just 19 – they thought "This is surreal. Who the hell am I?" But Zisin drew on experience, not naivety, in their decision to write the book.

"A lot of this book has been rebelling against – it's ironic to say this to a journalist – but to other people's journalistic takes on my story," they said.



"I was interviewed so many times where people manipulated my story, to something that was not the way it was. So much 'Girl became a boy!' sensationalised media. And I thought, screw this, I've got a story to tell, I've got my own words, I'm going to write it."

Zisin also felt they would be able to handle the inevitable backlash, trolling, and potential threats that come with being an out transgender person.

"It's not glory and excitement to be so openly trans. It's terrifying and life-threatening. And I can handle that," they said.

Finding Nevo tells Zisin's story of coming out as a lesbian, then as a trans guy, then as non-binary. It's primarily about gender, but Zisin also writes frankly about their blended family, their struggles with weight, and their relationship with Judaism.

The book has pictures of Zisin from all stages of their life. Many transgender people, Zisin included, are critical of the "before and after" photos that often accompany transition stories – but Zisin felt documenting the entirety of their journey was central to the story.



"There was a time when I struggled to look at old photos of myself, because I felt it invalidated me now," they said. "But there was no stage of my life where I was less me."

In the final scene of Finding Nevo, Zisin imagines attending a party with all the different incarnations of themself the book talks about – an enthusiastic six-year-old, a 13-year-old struggling with weight, and a painfully shy 17-year-old, and others, each presenting their gender in a different way.

"I wanted people to be there with those people. They all have something to say for themselves, and an energy about them that you've got to see in the photos."

To Zisin, it is "so naive" to insist only two genders exist.



"You do such a disservice to yourself to say I'm a woman, or I'm a man. What does that mean? The way you identify with your gender is going to be so different to everyone else in the world. There are seven and a half billion genders, and I want to know what makes your gender yours," they said.

Being outside of the gender binary leaves Zisin feeling great on some days, but on others, awful.

"When I wear nail polish and people just stare at me. It's just the looks that I get, the othering, how different I feel. And it's like, yeah I am different, but you're so boring. You look like everyone ever," they added.

"Some dudes will call me mate, bro, man, dude, in one sentence. And it's like, who's insecure about their gender here? It's weird."

But while Zisin's nature is jovial, they get serious on one topic: the hostility of the world to transgender people.