If Lesbian Porn Were Accurate, In Haiku

Anna Pulley’s previous lesbian haiku for The Toast can be found here. This post was brought to you by Jay Casey.

Illustrator credit: Kelsey Beyer

Petite Red Head and Caliente Latina Roommates Surprise the Pizza Delivery Man

With a lecture on

how his employer should

compost pizza boxes.

Two Blondes Engage in Some Much-Sought-After Pussy Play

Susan and Chris knew

how understaffed the local

no-kill shelter was.

A Blue-Haired Girl in Knee-Length Board Shorts Teaches Her Slutty Twin Sister a Lesson She Won’t Soon Forget

“You know, The Dog

Whisperer is really the same

episode every time.”

Cohabitating Co-Eds in Lust Swap Many Secrets

“Take off your shirt,” she

commands. “This soap I made

is hypoallergenic.”

Horny Amateur Babe Wearing Pajamas Her Mother Bought Her at Lands End Loves Dirty Talking Her Lover (A PhD Candidate in Musicology)

“This non-dairy ice

cream is so good I want to

put it in my vag!”

*

A Busty Babe’s First Time Kissing Her Flat Mate

Ten hot seconds, followed

by months of “what does it

mean?” conversations.

*

Naughty Lesbian Babysitter Has Surprise for Dad When He Returns Home

She let the kids stay

up until 11 watching

Harry Potter.

Hot MILFs Engage in a Steamy Clam Photo Sesh

One arranges bread

while the other gets the best

angle for Instagram.

Big-Boobed Sorority Sisters Satisfy Each Other’s Every Desire

Tofutti Cuties,

Hulu Plus, and analyzing

Liz Phair videos.

A Precocious Young Lass Has Something to Share with Her Catholic School-Girl Classmates After Class

A zine of Ani

lyrics, Glee fan fiction, and

the merits of jorts.

*