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The Fourth of July is one of the few days of the year that just about everyone looks forward to, along with Christmas, Thanksgiving and the beginning of football season. To ring in the 236th birthday of our great nation, we decided to have a little fun and give you the top five reasons why USC is America’s school. You know, because America needs one major research university to go along with the three historic military academies.

Before we begin, let’s look at some of the reasons that didn’t make cut. Things like Presidential visits, the Spirit of Troy having a hand in the Olympic Band in 1984 and the second coming of Jesus Christ Kevin Ellison being a Trojan.

We didn’t include the fact that USC is now the only school with a national radio syndication deal for college football, or the fact that more Americans juxtapose the idea of safe sex with the USC Trojans.

USC’s being named “College of the Year 2000” didn’t find a spot in the top five, nor the fact that USC has won six more national titles in America’s pastime than anyone else.

The United States was led into the first Gulf War by a Trojan, but General Norman Schwarzkopf wasn’t historic enough to be on our list. USC is the only university in the world to receive eight nine-figure donations, but philanthropy didn’t fit on the list either.

Let’s see what did. Click “continue reading” below to fight on through our top five.