Anonymous asked: I've noticed that several of Maren Sanchez's friends have come forward (on tumblr) to say that her death didn't have to do with male entitlement, and that it was horrible an disrespectful for feminists to turn her death into a political statement for their agenda. Normally I'd disagree, but since it's many of her friends saying this, I feel weird. What are your thoughts? And should the friends wishes be respected? (I did check out their blogs and I could tell they were being truthful.)

I think that the personal is political and nobody is “using” anything for any “agenda.” Seriously, EVERYTHING personal that exists has some sort of politic behind it because our lives are complex webs inseperably intertwined with the patriarchal, heterosexist, capitalist, racist, classist, ableist, etc etc etc power structures that permeate every single aspect of our culture. There’s no getting around it, even the simple act of drinking a glass of water or shopping at the grocery store or watching something on Netflix is fraught with all sorts of political implications.

The following facts exist:

Male entitlement exists in our society

Male entitlement has dangerous and violent effects for women

The only way anything will ever ever change is by talking about it, constantly shining a light on it over and over again until people get it and stop contributing to the problem

These things can’t be argued, they’re not opinions, they are facts. Not talking about it doesn’t make the problem go away and it’s not the fault of the people who point this shit out that it exists in the first place. Getting mad at the messengers who bring it up is a form of violence in it’s own right, it’s silencing, it’s damaging, it’s derailing, and it damn sure doesn’t do anybody any good.

I honestly don’t think it’s disrespectful to talk about why this shit is happening and to try to enact change through those discussions. I think that if any good at all comes from those discussions then I think that’s a fitting honor, not an act of disrespect. I also think that not talking about it or ignoring it or pretending that these political elements didn’t exist would be disrespectful, it would be ultimately lying about the situation, about what she suffered, and she deserves to have her story - the whole story - told.

But that is just my opinion and I could certainly be wrong about all of this.