SCANDAL: Players gather in Mandis to inaugurate Cubist cathedral’s sex dungeon with massive orgy Devonmartino Follow Dec 3, 2015 · 2 min read

Today was a banner day for Cubism. Ten players congregated in Mandis to celebrate the inauguration of a new cathedral. Built to honor the Cubist faith, this cathedral includes a massive spire, a glorious chapel, and a beautiful entryway displaying the quiet splendor of nature…as well as a secret basement, where Pontifax Devonmartino reportedly led his followers to enjoy the wonders of the human body.

The Mandis city of Port Hercules, where players gathered for the sexual extravaganza. Cathedral shown at center.

“I didn’t stay for the whole thing,” said a female attendee, who wished to remain anonymous. “It was kind of a sausage party.” Witness estimates place the count at 8 men, one woman, and one robot, who simply plugged himself into the nearest computer’s USB port and started making sounds of pleasure.

“I thought it was a roaring success,” Pontifax Devonmartino told the Sun earlier today. “It seemed like a couple of people didn’t really expect what was happening, but I did put up a sign.”

One of the only known pictures of the attendees. The sign which informed readers of the orgy to come has been circled in red. User’s faces and usernames have been censored. [Photographer: Devonmartino]

When asked about how the proceedings turned out, the Pope had only this to say: “All in all, I think it went well. I expected it to go a little longer, but, well…these are Minecrafters.”

None of the other attendees were available for comment.