Ohio State Zach Boren 2013 Buffalo opener

Urban Meyer saw 2012 captain Zach Boren on the walk from St. John Arena to Ohio Stadium and pulled him into line with the current players before Saturday's game against Buffalo.

(Doug Lesmerises)

COLUMBUS, Ohio – The Ohio State seniors woke up on Nov. 25 of last year to a perfect, and perfectly brutal, reality. After 12 straight victories and three long months of successfully pushing a bowl ban out of their minds, it was over.

They'd never play football as Buckeyes again.

Saturday, Zach Boren reluctantly returned to Ohio Stadium to confront that reality. There was nowhere Boren, a fullback, linebacker and captain last year, would have rather been, but he had to force himself to go.

“I knew it was going to be really hard on me,” Boren told Cleveland.com in a phone call Sunday. “I wanted to be out there playing in the Horseshoe again, and it's hard to kind of accept the fact that I've moved on, and I'm done with college.”

Boren's older brother, Justin, had gone through the same thing after the 2010 season. His younger brother Jacoby, a sophomore backup center with the Buckeyes, will face it some day as well. It happens to about 20 Buckeyes and to thousands of other college athletes each year. In talking with former players, Boren has been told it takes 18 months to two years to shake it all out, to get the blood, sweat and tears from your alma mater to seep out of your system and allow you to look ahead.

Standing by his parents Saturday along the pathway leading to Ohio Stadium, dressed in a red T-shirt and jeans, kept from the players on their walk from the Skull Session in St. John Arena to the stadium by a thin yellow rope, just like any fan, it hadn't left Boren yet. Not even close.

It may stay with Boren and John Simon and Etienne Sabino and the seniors from last year even longer than in other years. Because when they talk, they remember Nov. 25. And they remember they didn't feel like they were done.

"It didn't hit us until that next day after the Michigan game," Boren said. "We were like, 'Oh man, we're done. We have nothing left to do.' Now sitting back, especially seeing this year and what we did last year, it's like, 'Wow, it's really unfinished.' But there's nothing we can do to go back to do something about that."

What Boren and his teammates want back is the two games they lost because of the bowl ban resulting from sanctions handed down by the NCAA. They want the Big Ten championship game and their bowl game, which they believe would have been the BCS National Championship.

“It's definitely hard looking back and thinking there was still stuff to be done last year,” Boren said. “And now it's over, and you've got to move on.”

Boren had done that after signing as a free agent with the Houston Texans. He'd talked and texted with former teammates, but hadn't seen them in person for weeks. He'd seen coach Urban Meyer once, when Boren and Simon over the summer went to a baseball game of Meyer's son, Nate. So rather than delay the inevitable moment when he'd someday return as a fan, Boren decided to face it. Face the team hotel at The Blackwell, face the fans outside the stadium, face The Shoe.

He wanted to support Jacoby and his friends, and face it the first day he could.

“I've got to do it,” Boren said.

Zach Boren, red T-shirt, joined Corey Brown and the current Buckeyes for the walk into Ohio Stadium on Saturday.

His plan was to offer high-fives and hugs to his friends and former teammates as they passed him in their black blazers, offer the support he said he felt when he saw former Buckeyes like Raymont Harris and Troy Smith during his playing days. Boren's face was blank, his head down, his hands in his pockets, as Meyer approached at the front of the Buckeye pack, shaking and slapping hands along the way.

“I was definitely sad,” Boren said. “I wanted to be on the other side of the ropes. I wanted to be with those guys.”

Boren saw his coach and extended a hand. Meyer saw his player and offered a hug. And then Meyer lowered the thin yellow rope. And he brought Zach Boren back to the team.

Zach Boren, 44, moved from fullback to linebacker in 2012 and helped the Buckeyes finish an undefeated season against Michigan on Nov. 24.

“I love his family. He's all Buckeye. He's one of the players I'm closest with,” Meyer told Cleveland.com after the Buckeyes' 40-20 win over Buffalo. “I love seeing his face. I appreciate what he did for us. He's family now.”

Boren stepped inside the rope and took his place next to Corey Brown, one of the eight captains this season. He walked the rest of the way into the stadium with the players and then across the field to the locker room.

“It gave me I guess another 100 yards on that walk,” Boren said. “I thought the last one was against Michigan, but I got to experience it again.”

He talked with his teammates in the locker room. He had the pregame conversation with Jacoby he never had as a player, when he was busy getting himself ready to play. He then stood on the sidelines with other former Buckeyes like Reid Fragel, Dan Herron and DeVier Posey.

“I'm very glad I went,” Boren said. “It's something where you've got to face the facts. I can't go back and play college football again, so I had to get it over with and move on. All those guys know I love them. So I'm really glad I went.”

Boren spoke those words Sunday afternoon from Houston, when he'd flown in the morning. He'd been cut by the Texans earlier in the week, but given a clear indication that the team hoped to sign him to its practice squad. Friday night he got the call to be ready to fly back.

When he arrived Sunday, Boren went to Reliant Stadium to sign his new contract with the Texans. That means on Saturday, he hadn't officially been part of any team.

For one last walk, he was free to be a Buckeye.