Do you like doing absolutely nothing for hours at a time?

Do you like getting so frustrated that you want to throw your controller at the wall?

Does getting “Nintendo-Thumb” sound appealing to you?

If all of these describe your fantasy game-playing experience than I have the perfect game for you!

RHYTHM HEAVEN FEVER (tada!)

Run, don’t walk, up to the game purchasing locale of your choosing and pick-up a copy of the much hyped yet excruciatingly terrible, third installment of the Rhythm Heaven series ($29.99).

The point of Rhythm Heaven Fever is simply to keep rhythm with the music/actions that are being shown on the screen. You keep the rhythm by pushing either the A or B buttons on the Wii Remote.

For example: Little monkey is playing a tambourine. He SHAKE/SHAKE/SHAKESHAKESHAKES. You then have to SHAKE/SHAKE/SHAKESHAKESHAKE after him. The “shakes” come from you repeatedly hitting the A button. So it’s more like Press A/ Press A/Press APressAPressAHHHHHHH this game is ridiculous!

Not convinced yet? Here’s another example: Boy on a bench. For some odd reason there are footballs, basketballs and soccer balls that keep rolling over to him. You have to hit the A button at the correct time so that he kicks the balls out of the way. Each ball has a different rhythm that matches up with the background music (sort-of). This gets a bit tricky when they switch between each of the balls because the rhythm changes. Tricky? Yes. Fun? No.

Challenging certainly isn’t an issue with this game. I grew up playing guitar/piano and recently dabbled in learning to play the drums. One would say because of my musical (albeit mediocre) abilities, that I wouldn’t have too much of an issue keeping the beat. Well that assumption is wrong. The first friggin game I played had me wanting to turn off the Wii and throw the entire console off of my balcony. I thought maybe I just sucked at first because I was under the influence of wine. Maybe I just didn’t understand the game? So, I passed the controller over and let my friends have a shot (2-player mode isn’t unlocked until later in the game).

It wasn’t just me. This game is terrible.

There are about 50 different types of these rhythm games to play throughout Rhythm Heaven Fever, each one more frustrating than the next. The better you play, the more little mini-games and prizes you can unlock. Yay….

Although I really did not enjoy any second of the few hours I played this game, I will say that visually and musically the game is quite a hoot. Cute graphics and catchy silly songs don’t make a game worth $30 though (or $5 in this case).

I have to imagine that if you were a fan of these games on the Nintendo DS and Game Boy Advance, then you will enjoy the series leap over to the Wii. Otherwise, if you play video games because of the action and adventure of it all, then you may just want to steer far away from this barely-more-than-an-iphone-app game.

You want to learn rhythm? Save the money you would have spent on this and invest in an actual drumset. Rhythm Heaven Fever is nothing more than what you are doing while flipping through cable channels looking for something to watch on tv.

Click. Reality Show. Click. Reality Show. Click. Reality Show. Click.

5 out of 10

+ Fun graphics

+ Catchy music

– Boring

– 2 Player Mode isn’t unlocked until later in the game

– Difficulty seemed off-balance (one game super easy, next one is almost impossible).