Dear Sweetie Drops and Lyra:We hope all finds you well. Your mission, should you accept it, is to mitigate a vampire fruit bat infestation in Trottingham. You must escort Her Highness Princess Twilight Sparkle and a pegasus mare named Fluttershy on the train from Ponyville to Trottingham, whereupon arrival the princess will turn Miss Fluttershy into a vampire bat pony. The latter will then disperse the fruit bats utilizing a mind-control technique colloquially known as "The Stare" to the accompaniment of vintage Minimoog sound effects. You must ensure Miss Fluttershy stays on mission and is not distracted by any apple displays or apple carts. Deploy the included giant apple costume should Miss Fluttershy deviate. Should you fail in this mission, Princess Celestia and the Equestria government shall deny all knowledge blah blah blah. You know the spiel. Good luck, Sweetie Drops and Lyra.This message will self-destruct---(explosion)... in thirty seconds?If they increased the agency's budget we could actually make these exploding audio messages work right for once!