CLICK "High you've reached the phone of Cadence Tomson. I can't answer the phone right now since I'm trapped as my own answering machine. If you would like me to get back to you if and when I change back please leave your name and number after the beep.” BEEP



BEEP “Hey Cadence, it’s Steve. I was going to call you to warn you about my crazy ex, but it looks like I’m a little late, sorry. If you want to go out again after you change back please give me a call.” CLICK



BEEP “Hey Cadence it’s Janet. I just had a rough day and thought I would call you up I always get a kick out of hearing your voice. I hope you're enjoying yourself. I have to get back to work now but I’m sure I’ll find some time later to give you another call.” CLICK



BEEP “Hey Cadence it’s Janet again. Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha, Oh Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha.” COUGHING.GASPING FOR BREATH “he he he.” CLICK



BEEP “Hey it’s Steve again. I just felt I needed to let you know, I’ve found someone else, and we’ve started dating. I hope there are no hard feelings.” CLICK



BEEP “Hello my names Maria and I’ve been turned into an auto dialer. If you would like to get a free information packet about how you can transform yourself and change your life please press one…”



BEEP “Hey it’s Steve again. Things didn’t work out with Maria. If you are still interested after you change back I would be willing to go out with you again. Please give me a call.” CLICK



BEEP “Cadence this is your land lord calling. I know that things have been a little weird for you lately, but you are four months late on your rent. If I you don’t pay by next friday I will be forced to put your apartment up for sale. If that happens anything left in the apartment will become the property of the next owner.” CLICK





CLICK “Hello you have reached the phone of Greg Libanez.” SNIFFLES “He can’t come to the phone at the moment but if you would like to leave your name and a number he will get back to you as soon as possible.” BEEP



BEEP “High this is customer support. After extensive research we have found no other examples of answering machines changing their introductory message to a sad female voice in the third person. If you still have the receipt we would be happy to exchange your machine for a new one.” CLICK



BEEP “High this is Ned. I’m calling about that answering machine you listed for sale. If you would like to call me back I would be happy to discuss the price with you.” CLICK