Godzilla’s favorite pastime may be stomping the guts out of Tokyo, but who knew he’s also ravenous for Eleven’s Eggos and has no problem vaporizing Ryan Gosling with his atomic breath?

Christopher Michael Beer is the genius behind these stop-motion kaiju-meets-every-other-genre-imaginable shorts that crashed onto the scene as bumpers at last week’s Cinepocalypse film festival.

The mutant dinosaur (yes, he is a dinosaur) goes from wielding a chainsaw against the undead in his own version of Evil Dead to playing a gruesome kind of fetch with his pet T-Rex, which looks suspiciously like the plastic version of the monster lizard from Jurassic Park. Spoiler: Rexy brings back something a little bloodier than the stick he previously had in his jaws.

Don’t ever ask Godzilla for a light. Ever. Even if you’re Ryan Gosling gone all Humphrey Bogart in a film noir scene and desperately need a light for your cigar. When Zilla’s lighter is defective, he’s going to use a more accessible method, which for him, pretty much just means exhaling.

When you’re so enormous that a T-Rex is your Golden Retriever—and you’re so used to it that the screams from outside don’t bother you enough to look up from the morning paper.

Leggo Eleven’s Eggos, because even if you are a hulking reptile that weighs more than the average ‘80s clunker, she will try to levitate mouth breathers like you away from them. The thing is that a walking lab experiment’s mind-control powers don’t necessarily work on kaiju. Watch the whole short here.

Go to Beer’s YouTube channel and follow him on Instagram @beeragon if you want to see more gojira action, from Godzilla playing Godzilla on Nintendo and freaking out at himself getting blasted to that amazing zombie short where he goes full Ash Williams on those zombies. As if that couldn’t get more awesome, he does it to Led Zepplin’s Immigrant Song.

Oh, and there’s more Ryan Gosling action, this time in an alt version of Blade Runner 2049. It involves killer sunglasses.

(via Bloody-Disgusting)