In March of this year Supernatural star, Jared Padalecki, who has headlined the hit series since its inception, revealed that he has previously struggled with clinical depression. His decision to share his personal battle came about after launching a T-shirt campaign to benefit a nonprofit organization supporting people struggling with addiction, depression, self-injury and suicide.

The actor told Variety that he has been passionate about helping people who struggle with depression, addiction, or having suicidal thoughts because “strangely enough, it’s almost like the life I live, as well. These characters that we play on Supernatural, Sam and Dean, are always dealing with something greater than themselves, and I’ve sort of learned from the two of them that they get through it with each other, and with help ad with support.”

Depression, it seems, was not always a part of Padalecki’s life. Born July 19, 1982 in San Antonio, Texas, to Gerald Padalecki, and Sherri (Kammer), he was an active child, who excelled in school and started taking his first acting lessons at the early age of 12.

In 1998 Padalecki and his partner won the National Forensic League national championship in Duo Interpretation, an event which involves a pair of performers acting out a literary piece or program under certain restraints, such as no eye contact, not touching your partner, and no props. The participants are also not allowed any dialogue.

He continued to shine at his education and during high school he was named a candidate for the year 2000 Presidential Scholars Program while attending James Madison High School.

In 1999, Padalecki won Fox’s Claim to Fame contest, which boosted his career and game him the opportunity to appear on the Teen Choice awards, where he was introduced to his future manager. The teen was only just beginning to feel the positive rewards of hard work and dedication.

After graduation in 2000, the six-foot-four youth changed his plans to attend college and instead moved to Los Angeles, California to pursue an acting career. His first big role was that of Dean Forester on the well-known show Gilmore Girls (2000), which aired on the Warner Brother’s Television Network (WB). He continued playing this role alongside actors Lauren Graham, Alexis Bledel and Melissa McCarthy among others, until 2005.

It was around this time that he also made his debut in the feature film arena, playing the role of Trey Lipton in the New York Minute (2004). His success led to roles in the horror film, House of Wax (2005), which grossed $70 million worldwide, and Friday the 13th in 2009.

From 2005 until recently, he portrayed one of the main protagonists, Sam Winchester, on the CW Television Network’s Supernatural (2005). His role as a devil-hunter earned him a devoted following of fans on the longest-running drama on TV, which finally conclude on May 20th of this year.

Padalecki was first diagnosed with depression long after his acting career began, although he had been dealing with anxiety since his move to Los Angeles, California, where he first experienced the stresses of building a new career in a completely new and unfamiliar city. “I was just this 17-year-old kid from San Antonio who went out to this big, scary Hollywood-land,” he explained. “The only way I really knew how to deal with my anxiety was to just keep working and keep my head down. Just work, work, work. Read, study, go to class. Go to auditions, meet with agents. And finally it all caught up.”

The star shared how he struggled with not being very happy with where he was in life and then in Season 3 of Supernatural, he had an anxiety attack, causing him to break down when he went to his trailer to get change while they were shooting an episode. “A doctor came to the set and talked to me for about 30 or 45 minutes and said: ‘Jared, I think you’re clinically depressed. I think I should write you a note and we can shut down production for five days and then we can take it from there.’ And it kind of hit me like a sack of bricks. I mean, I was 25 years old. I had my own TV show. I had dogs that I loved and tons of friends and I was getting adoration from fans and I was happy with my work, but I couldn’t figure out what it was; it doesn’t always make sense is my point. It’s not just people who can’t find a job, or can’t fit in in society that struggle with depression sometimes,” he expounded.

Padalecki recounted how two of his “great” friends came to his trailer to check on him that day and spent an hour or so talking with him. The distraught actor told them, “All right guys, I’m going through a tough time right now. I don’t know what it is, but I’m just going to keep my legs moving. I’m going to keep fighting.”

The understanding and support of both his friends and workplace, enabled him to return to work the very next day. Over time, through this supportive environment, he gradually got better. This personal experience created a passion within to help others dealing with mental illness.

The Supernatural star was fortune that he was able to keep working during this challenging time. According to the Canadian Mental Health Association, a job can be a big part of one’s identity and “staying connected to work can be helpful during recovery. It can be a place to contribute your skills, build social connection, contribute to something bigger, and earn a paycheque.”

In early 2016, not long after a 10-year friend hung himself on New Year’s eve, (not the first friend he has lost through suicide) the passionate star decided to create a T-shirt campaign to build awareness of mental illness. Coincidentally, he was also doing an episode on Supernatural specifically dealing with suicide at the time, so it all just made sense for him to finally act on his long-lived desire to help others. He felt it was a way to “help raise awareness and funds for and help to start a conversation to hopefully destigmatize these things that people are - for no good reason - ashamed to have, and there’s no shame in it.”

With respect to the Always Keep Fighting T-shirt campaign, he explained in an interview with Variety that “…there’s no shame in having to fight every day, but fighting every day, and presumably, if you’re still alive to hear these words or read this interview, then you are winning your war. You’re here. You might not win every battle. There are going to be some really tough days. There might be several times in any given single day, but hopefully, this will help somebody to think, ‘This isn’t easy; it is a fight, but I’m going to keep fighting’… Even if there are a thousand small fights, even if every other minute you’re thinking about suicide, or depression, or addiction, or if you have mental illness, I want people to hit it head on and take action. And to be proud that they’re winning their fight, period.”

When Padalecki first opened up to the public about his personal battles, he was worried that fans might reject him. He said, “No matter who you are or what position you’re in, you’re always afraid of not being understood or accepted, or you’re afraid of getting chastised or singled out. Part of me thought, ‘Here I am, I play this hero on TV, and I admit that I’ve had my own struggles, are they [his fans] going to shoo me away as if I’ve been faking this whole time?’” However, the support he received was overwhelmingly positive and he was extremely grateful at how much his admission was accepted and embraced by the public.

Over the years, Moods magazine has heard much feedback from readers about how helpful it is when celebrities share their personal struggles. Even with all the success and high expectations placed on famous people, it can be sobering when one realizes that they are really just as vulnerable as any one else, regardless of their wealth or fame. Many readers have stated how such sharing helped them to better deal with their own struggles - just knowing that they were not alone, just realizing that mental illness can affect anyone from any walk of life.

Padalecki explained how easy it is for someone to feel lost and alone. He said, “Hey, we’re not alone guys! You’re not alone, I’m not alone. Even I, in my position, I have to be reminded myself sometimes that I’m not alone. And this crazy business, ironic, but it can be such a lonely existence. You’re around tons of people, cast members, crew members, fans and family and friends, but if you live in your head, it doesn’t matter if you’re surrounded by a million people. You can get overwhelmed.”

According to Dr. Jeffrey Borenstein, president and CEO of the Brain and Behavior Research Foundation, “When celebrities speak publicly about their own experiences with depression or other psychiatric conditions, it’s very helpful.” He says, “It opens up a conversation about these issues. If someone you admire is going through the same thing you might be going through, it makes a difference with people, it causes people to seek help.”

On February 27, 2010, Padalecki married actor Genevieve Cortese. The two met when she guest starred on Supernatural during it’s fourth season. Only two years later, the couple welcomed their first son, Thomas. The following year they celebrated the birth of their second son.

This coming fall, Padalecki will reprise his role of Dean Forester on Neflix’s four-part revival series of Gilmore Girls. The date has not yet been confirmed, however it is rumoured to be sometime in November.

Reflecting back, the former Gilmore Girls alum admitted that his battle with anxiety is ongoing. “I still deal with anxiety on a daily basis,” Padalecki said. “A lot of artists are emotional beings, but we have to behave like, ‘Hey I’m great, I’m living life!’ That’s what we think the audience wants.”

He said that for the young actor, “life and art are about being there for someone and someone being there for you. For me, life is about deeper meaning. I’ve always tended towards honesty and being forthright. I’ve been lucky that anytime I’ve been honest, I’ve been approached with sincerity.”









Rebecca Gladding DiFilippo is a mother, writer, publisher, artist and mental health advocate, who likes to express her creativity through painting with acrylics, as well as many other artistic endeavours.