​Governments the world over try the same tired old tricks whenever they want to reduce or eliminate those ever-so-troublesome individual liberties. Yelling “Drugs!” unfortunately remains one of the most popular. Russia’s Drug Czar is doing some tough talk these days, possibly preparing the populace for some brutal, Soviet-style repression in the name of “cracking down on drugs.”

The Moscow Times. Russia should criminalize drug use, confiscate land used for cannabis cultivation and seal off the Central Asian border to “fight drug trafficking,” according to Viktor Ivanov, head of the Federal Drug Control Service, reports Alexandra Odynova at

Got that? Well you’re not gonna believe this. Ivanov, speaking to the State Duma (Russia’s legislative body), also welcomed wide-eyed deputies to a deeply bizarre “cautionary exhibit” of wax figures of “prominent drug users” like Nirvana’s Kurt Cobain and John Lennon’s murderer, Mark David Chapman.





​Wonder if they also had time to construct “cautionary” wax figures of some other “prominent drug users” — like, oh, for example, President Barack Obama or Walt Disney or Steve Jobs or Carl Sagan or… yeah, you’re right. Probably not.

Ivanov wasn’t shy in dispensing informative little pseudo-facts. “Today, drugs are a more widespread crime than theft,” Ivanov helpfully told the Duma.

But that wasn’t even his best material.

“A drug user can recruit up to 15 people during his or her lifetime,” Ivanov said.

Only 15 or 20? Shit, I can recruit 15 or 20 people before lunch!

Ivanov admitted that he supports an idea offered by a deputy to reintroduce the Soviet-era practice of criminalizing drug use. But don’t worry; this is going to be a kinder, gentler crackdown, apparently; Ivanov added that users should “have the option” of undergoing treatment instead of serving jail time. (As if it’s really just an “option” when the alternative is jail!)

A lot of abandoned land in Russia is used to cultivate cannabis, according to Ivanov. He called for land owners — who often say they are unaware of marijuana growing operations — to be held legally liable when plants are found.

Ivanov also supported a suggestion by helpful deputies to employ students to “destroy cannabis fields.” I’m sure they won’t have any trouble finding enthusiastic volunteers for that civic duty! Hell, I’ll bet I’ve personally burned a couple of acres just this year.

Ivanov claimed the current law suits drug traffickers, who can freely cross Central Asian borders as long as they hold Russian passports, easily obtainable by former Soviet citizens from the outlying republics under international agreements signed in the 1990s.

“More than 50 percent of the prominent foreign drug traffickers arrested in Russia had Russian passports, which serves as a perfect pass inside the country,” Ivanov claimed.

The Federal Drug Control Service estimates the number of “drug users” in Russia at 2.5 million, with 30,000 dying each year of “drug-related causes.”