But, frankly, I had no idea the EU were the ones in favour of uncurved bananas. I seem to remember during the "transatlantic banana split" of a few years ago that it was we in North America who were on the side of the straight banana and you in Europe who were the curvy ones. The banana war of the late Nineties was the turn-of-the-millennium version of those 19th-century imperial disputes where the Great Powers line up behind one obscure tribe or another and stage a proxy war. In this case, it was something to do with the different spheres of influence of Fyffes, Europe's banana supremo, and Chiquita, America's top banana. The US championed the cause of Latin-American bananas - these are the so-called "dollar" bananas: tall, straight, and thick-skinned, much like the Americans themselves. The Europeans, meanwhile, were on the side of Afro-Caribbean-Pacific bananas: short, bent, and with a pronounced aroma, much like the Europeans themselves.