We just received a submission in our photo section from a student whose professor made a mistake that seems to be happening to pedagogues of higher education more and more lately. Instead of a powerpoint about economics or history or whatever-the-fuck he meant to display, students were treated with a crash course in physics — namely, the effect of the female figure on the elasticity of a male’s trousers.

Our tipster says that they are both faculty members at Michigan State University, and apparently, the woman our Romeo has been texting has a bod so hot, she’s gotta keep it covered up. Otherwise, homeboy’s gonna be wrestling a raging lap hog all day, which would be “awkward” for his students.

It’s kinda fuzzy, but I translated the sultry text the best I could:

Man: And I got the hiding part. I just know if I knew you had them on as we were going through our day, I’d have a tent pole in the front of my pants all day… Woman: That would be awkward for students

Good call, Missus. We wouldn’t want things to get awkward for the kids. My guess is the “hiding part” refers to the female staffer feeling the need to cover up her juicy butt and/or rockin’ tits for the sake of professionalism.

Man: Yeah, Just let me know after I lecture so I can sit at my desk the rest of the day Woman: *Thumbs Up* Man: *Bomb Emojii* shell. You’re *Fire Emojii* Believe me? Woman: Some days

Damn. I don’t know about y’all, but I’m going to be sitting at my desk for a hot minute too after reading that. The man has a way with words. This has to be an English class.

She’s all about the flattery, too. She “believes” him that she’s sexy, but only some days. The dude needs to hit her up more. Make her feel beautiful all day everyday. Maybe take things to the next level and send her a picture of the tent pole she pitched.

The only thing that baffles me is why the dude needs to know she’s wearing that sexy outfit to pop a stiffy during class. He’s using his imagination after all. He can imagine her as an alien chick with tits the size of beanbag chairs if he wants to.

I don’t know if these crazy kids are in a relationship or if they’re in a relationship with other people or what, but I do hope this lapse in judgment doesn’t ruin things for them. Technological mistakes happen all the time. The girl shouldn’t hold it against him (not that she could with the tent pole in the front of his pants all day)..