Even if well-intentioned, he said, benevolent sexism has been shown to correlate with hostile sexism, with threats to women “who don’t fit the idealized mold of women as pure, faithful and compliant. It’s important to promote a masculinity that’s not all about ‘protecting women,’ but rather about standing up for whoever is vulnerable.”

Encourage Empathy

Sexual harassment and assault are often rooted in male entitlement, specifically in men viewing women as objects. Such a view has been bolstered by the media for decades, whether in the form of scantily clad women being used to advertise everything from cars to Carl’s Jr. to Calvin Klein underwear, or Megan Fox’s bare legs and cleavage on constant display in the “Transformers” movies, a franchise heavily marketed to young boys.

But even though sexualized images may be pervasive, parents aren’t powerless. Campbell Leaper, a psychologist at the University of California, Santa Cruz, says parents can start a discussion by asking their kids to count up the number of women in a movie relative to the number of men. “If male characters greatly outnumber women, or if the men are dominant, a parent can encourage a son to consider how a woman in such a situation might feel,” Dr. Leaper said.

Swap Chores

Emily Kane, a sociologist and author of “The Gender Trap: Parents and the Pitfalls of Raising Boys and Girls,” argues that parents need to rethink the gendered divisions that have traditionally separated boys from girls, and have long excluded kids who don’t fit neatly into either gender. “Though many parents encourage their daughters to aspire to traditionally male occupations, few encourage their sons to consider traditionally female ones, like nursing, elementary education or social work,” Dr. Kane said.

Dr. Kane stresses the importance of breaking gender stereotypes in small, everyday practices. For example, she recommends assigning boys the kinds of household chores typically given to girls, like mending clothes and dusting furniture and nurturing younger siblings. Likewise, promoting emotional expression — the freedom to be vulnerable and sad, rather than just angry and strong — as well as celebrating creativity and quiet introspection are also key to countering patterns of gender inequality.

Keep Talking

Fathers are often the guardians of gender boundaries, especially for boys. Anxiety concerning the harsh social judgments a son will receive for straying from the traditional gender norms can lead some heterosexual fathers to unconsciously reinforce limiting and even harmful views of what it means to be a man. It’s therefore doubly important, Dr. Kane said, for dads not only to strive to loosen the restrictions on the kinds of men their sons can be, but also to make a point of calling out gender stereotypes.

All of this sounds fine, except for one problem. My heart-to-hearts with my boys rarely go the way I’d like. They are only at the start of adolescence, and already every cell in their bodies wants to resist me. On most days I’m the last person they want to talk to about sex. Given the pressures from their peer groups, the pervasiveness of cultural messages and their raging hormones, how much of an influence can I really have?