ContraryMaryRises Thu 27-Jun-19 11:21:50

Please can someone help me get my head around this. Google hasn’t helped me with it.



A man I really like has been seriously flirting with me for a year, giving me the impression that he’s interested in me but making up excuses whenever I suggest meeting up alone. He always seems to have a really good genuine reason but doesn’t immediately come back with an alternative date. However he does suggest meeting up in a group and we have done this several times and always have a great time. Basically every suggestion that I make is met with a no. It’s always on his terms.



However, we get on extremely well. He calls me about once a week for long chats and we have deep interesting conversations. We text about every 2-3 days.



I’m very attracted to him. We have a mutual male friend who I am 100% sure hasn’t spoken to him about me but this mutual friend is annoyed because he thinks that DF (friend) is just after an ego boost.



I did think at one point that DF was attracted to me as there was lots of intense eye contact, welling up from him, etc. However it hasn’t amounted to anything.



He’s a great catch but isn’t necessarily the most conventionally handsome guy. He’s also quite shy around women.



So I have decided to accept that he’s not attracted to me or else he would make a move. I think our friend could be right in that he just wants me as an ego boost.



The thing that I don’t understand is why would someone do that? I wouldn’t string along someone I like (and I know that he definitely likes me as a friend). Is it because he’s insecure? I’m not remotely insecure myself so I just don’t get the psychology of it. If you are enjoying the attention of a man you have no intention of being with, please can you explain it to me?



Thanks