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You're like an alcoholic away from the bar—all you do is miss shots.

You couldn't tackle me if I took a nap.

Happy Gilmore called—he wants his golf swing back.

Trash talk—and more importantly, trash talk far more clever than my offerings here—are a vital and entertaining part of sports. Trash talk can be a way to get a few chuckles while ribbing an opponent, or it can be a strategy employed to gain a psychological advantage.

But sometimes, it backfires. Sometimes, it isn't appropriate. Sometimes, it makes an athlete or coach look really stupid.

On this list, we remember the stupid.