This week we saw 55 contracts marking the first day of Bitcoin options on CME, ETF giant WisdomTree planing to launch a stablecoin, and 21 leading crypto industry players that’ll advise OECD on blockchain. We looked into a report about the strongest validation of the BTC safe haven theory, and another one saying that if BTC and main altocins don’t start a bull run, exchange tokens may decline, but also into a potential Bitcoin SV pump & dump as Craig Wright opened the Pandora’s box. While only some exchanges matter for BTC discovery, Kraken took over Bit Trade, Liquid cancelled Gram presale, and corrupt OTC brokers sent dirty USD 1.5bn in BTC to Binance and Huobi. Speaking of Binance, it’s eyeing the Japanese market with a Yahoo Japan and TaoTao partnership.

Bithumb’s biggest shareholder pulled out of a major lawsuit. Meanwhile, Polish competition watchdog called DasCoin a ponzi scheme, South Korea’s court will rule on the legality of the country’s partial crypto crackdown, the Communist Party of China approved a crypto and blockchain book designed for its high ranking government staff, Japan could accept regulatory proposals that would see leveraged trading caps slashed by 50% at the country’s crypto exchanges, and the UN told the Cryptoverse not to travel to the North Korean conference. We saw that new institutional investors helped Grayscale Investments raise over USD 600 million in 2019. We looked into Ethereum 2.0, and as pre-Bitcoin halving race pushed mining difficulty to record high, we discussed if BTC halving pattern will repeat this year. Finally, check out these do’s and don’ts of staking and this VC ‘playbook’ for cryptocurrency startup success.

Here are your well-deserved jokes. Enjoy!

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First things first.

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👏🏼👏 👏🏼👏 👏🏼👏 👏🏼 👏👏🏼

(steps up to the mic) tap

tap

on the microphone

microphone squeaks

cough erhm “I’m bullish on Bitcoin” THUNDEROUS APPLAUSE — moon (@MoonOverlord) January 14, 2020

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Watch the latest reports by Block TV.

Perfect execution.

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Not so long ago, you’d be spanked for this.

My mom didn’t put all this effort into raising me so I would take profit at first resistance. — DonAlt (@CryptoDonAlt) January 14, 2020

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Heavy bags, light body.

That feeling waking up with my bags pumped up af… pic.twitter.com/wLmkC1xY9s — Panama Crypto (@Panama_TJ) January 14, 2020

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And by cryptogod, there shall be memes!

Source: Hodl Hodl / Twitter

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While some are watching this…

CT sentiment right now after seeing $BTC and $ALTS rising together after months of down movement. pic.twitter.com/ZsY6vBtqJn — ₿lackbeard (@crypto_blkbeard) January 14, 2020

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…others watch this.

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Ha! And you always thought it was a black hole swallowing you!

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Excuse-moi?

Source: Crypto Memes / Facebook

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Here’s a movie in the cryptodocumentary gangster-action horror genre.

The Adventures of Shitcoin Traders pic.twitter.com/HXjZWJXCGY — CryptoChimp (@Cryptanzee) January 12, 2020

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And here’s a movie in the cryptodocumentary psychedelic thriller genre.

A short story of BSV in 2020… pic.twitter.com/pTN4uKypMD — Bitcoin Meme Hub 🔞 (@BitcoinMemeHub) January 16, 2020

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And that wallet got fatter this week.

insane parents: *yelling at me because my bank account is empty* Money in a Bitcoin wallet, only I know exists: pic.twitter.com/jlzCzCTUHT — Bet (@neet_bet) January 14, 2020

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It’s rare for a trader to sleep with a smile and without night terrors.

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And while some sleep well, others are caught by surprise.

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Behold! A very large, not at all hollow gift!

Cryptocurrency whales right now 😂😂 pic.twitter.com/XvTCrxxBep — TEDDY ⛓️💡 (@teddycleps) January 16, 2020

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All expertly balanced.

My feed right now pic.twitter.com/CbFdqKyD4Y — The Crypto Monk ⛩ (@thecryptomonk) January 14, 2020

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Sure it does. Every office is BTC office.

Delivery guy came into our office, saw this screen and asked “Bitcoin has an office?” pic.twitter.com/KUOGmporiH — 𝕊𝕥𝕖𝕧𝕖𝕟 (@Dogetoshi) January 15, 2020

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And vice versa.

Source: TyanOne / Twitter

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Bitcoin, baby!

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