I recently was extremely annoyed and frustrated with my three kids. My family had just finished lunch with one of my graduate school classmates who is a fire chief in a major metropolitan city. I figured my kids would have been extremely excited to meet her.

My kids love firefighters but they were not at all interested in meeting the chief. They begged me to stay home. I had to drag them out of the house. My kids at the restaurant were more interested in playing the free 1980’s arcade games then meeting the chief. I had to pull them away from Pac-Man . I tried to be patient with them. My friend was a stranger to them. Plus, they had never seen or played the old style arcade games. My kids did not talk much at lunch and they were not listening. I felt like I had to prod and poke them just to talk. I was somewhat mad, and slightly embarrassed that my kids were so quiet. I felt like we had wasted the chief’s time.

The next day my kids shocked me. They were quietly having a very serious discussion in the back seat of the car. My six year old son, the youngest of my three kids, in a very sincere voice was telling his two sisters what the best things about being a fireman are: “You get to help people! You get paid to break stuff! You are taught how to break stuff! And if you break stuff well, you will get an award!” I was floored. My young son had word for word repeated exactly what the chief said about why she liked her job. I was amazed — my kids had actually listened to the chief.

I was so happy to have been wrong! My kids had been listening to the chief in their own way. I failed to realize they had been paying attention all along.

Why was I so happy? I like many parents at times wonder if my kids are actually listening to me. We get the eye rolls, blank stares, shoulder shrugs, “I do not knows” or even dead silence when trying speak with our children. We can even get the dreaded “I know, I know, you’ve said that a million times” statement. We are often left wondering if our communications are making it through to them. Are they learning the important hard-won life lessons we as parents are trying to teach them? Are we making a difference or are they going to learn the hard way?

Firefighters, policemen and other homeland security professionals play a major role in the lives our children. They provide our children with some of their first major safety lessons — “stop, drop and roll” and that “911 is not for fun”! You can ask a policeman for help. These selfless civil servants influence our children in ways that we as parents simply cannot. They are a more valuable community resource then I thought. They can even teach us adults fire safety and other lessons if we let them.

Firefighters entertain and educate children by Nathaniel Lopez

My friend, the fire chief, also taught me an extremely important and invaluable lesson that I did not expect but am grateful to have learned. My kids are listening and learning even when I think they are not! Thank you chief!! Now — I have to figure out what you meant by “break stuff”!

#parent #lifelessons #firefighters