ANN ARBOR, MI—Describing the occurrence as a troubling indicator for the U.S. economy, a University of Michigan report released Thursday revealed that consumer confidence was shaken this month after Cincinnati-area mom Leslie Barger bought the wrong kind of tortilla chips. “Our data show that consumers became intensely pessimistic about the direction the American economy was headed when Mrs. Barger purchased those gross, thin white tortilla chips instead of the good kind,” said economist Richard Meyer, adding that the 45-year-old mother of three returning from a shopping trip with unsalted chips that always break when dipped was a major factor in the negative outlook among U.S. households. “Americans appear deeply unsettled by this turn of events. We expect spending activity to plummet to the lowest point in decades on the knowledge that the tortilla chips are those little round ones that taste bland and not the big, salty scoops that pick up lots of salsa.” Consumer confidence reportedly recovered briefly when Americans realized that the Ohio mom had also bought the fancy root beer.

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