For too long, us fat neckbeards have had no positive role models to look up to. And we don't want to invent a new hero or character that reflects us because we're too lazy and not very creative. So instead, we'd like to hijack an already iconic character and apply our attributes to them. We have chosen Superman, because he's an iconic symbol of fitness and strength, which are attributes that make us feel bad, but also envious. So please, we implore those at DC Comics and Warner Brothers Studios to make Superman into a fat, neckbeard.



Also, he should have a fedora that shields him from kryptonite and be a MGTOW that tells Lois Lane to GTFO of his life. He doesn't need to be wasting his time saving that chick all the time. He should spend most of his time getting in arguments on the internet, then flying to the houses of those who annoy him and burning down their houses with his heat vision.



If you do not make this happen for us, we will cry like babies and boycott all Superman films and comics forever. Thank you.