‘Does the UK have impeachment?’ wonders the 71% of electorate who didn’t vote for Boris

The majority of the British electorate is looking enviously at how the US has impeached its leader.

The lying, philandering President of the USA has been impeached for abusing his power. Almost three-quarters of the eligible voters in last week’s general election are now wondering if we should be doing something similar.

“It really feels like we should have an equivalent process for dealing with abhorrent and criminal behaviour,” said non-Conservative voter Simon Williams.

“I don’t mean a vote of no confidence – that just addresses good old-fashioned incompetence. There should be something which actually punishes those who abuse public office.

“Or isn’t giving taxpayer funds to some woman you’re shagging considered such an abuse?

“Impeachment would somehow feel like a more appropriate response to Boris’ shady activities than sending him into Downing Street with a stonking great majority.”

However, there are warnings from across the pond that taking such action would just be akin to poking a hornet’s nest with an extremely big stick.

“Trump’s impeachment isn’t going to achieve anything,” said Simon’s American cousin Chuck.

“You think people voted Trump into office because they thought he was a stand-up guy? Hell no, this is just going to make them even more hostile to the law-abiding loony left.

“Trump controls the Senate – he’s not going anywhere. Except probably back into power in 2020 thanks to people who’ll view the impeachment as some kind of martyrdom.

“God bless… I mean, God help America.”