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What do nightmares mean ?



Columnist: Kathleen Meadows Posted on Sunday, 12 October, 2014 | 19 comments Columnist:

Article Copyright© Kathleen Meadows - reproduced with permission.

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Everyone has nightmares. Being chased by something or someone intending us harm; falling in an abyss without a parachute; looking into a mirror in our dream discovering that our appearance has altered alarmingly; seeing someone we love die or disappear, are a few examples. There are as many different types of nightmares as there are people but our reaction to them is the same. We awaken sweating, sometimes screaming out loud, heart beating fast and so enormously relieved to discover it was a nightmare and not waking life!Their meaning is likely as individual as we are however, there are several common reasons. One is that we have had experiences in our lives that have traumatized us severely. We may not allow ourselves to ponder these experiences consciously because the effects are still too raw. Our consciousness however must integrate and file these experiences into our psychic makeup. We must give them context, meaning to hopefully reach a place of peace and acceptance.There are other common reasons for nightmares; fear of failure, poor health, or victimization. Being bullied generates more than its share of nightmares in a victim of any age. Being faced with a difficult choice, behaving in a manner unfamiliar to our self-concept, abandonment, loneliness, lack of safety can all trigger the advent of a nightmare.They do mean that we need to pay closer attention to something happening in our everyday lives. We are either guilty of ignoring the threat entirely or minimizing its impact on our psyches. During WWI for example, military psychiatrists noticed that when men on the front lines began dreaming of the horrors of war they needed to be removed from the battle. Somehow the horror had breached a psychic barrier which often presaged the onslaught of a crippling mental illness. So nightmares let us know that a fear of something has breached our normal defences and we ignore its message at our peril.Consider nightmares to be rather like a psychic scream. Our unconscious mind has been murmuring warnings to us to which we’ve failed to give credence that has in turn forced our psyche’s to amplify the volume. In essence our psyche has been left little choice but to alarm us to attention!Keeping in mind however, that dreams amplify our waking life experiences by tenfold, a nightmare may be highlighting a growing neurosis – fear of something not founded in reality but rather a phobia or unfounded worry. People who describe themselves as “worry warts” tend be plagued more frequently with nightmares. Regardless, a nightmare in this case still demands attention. A growing phobia can be crippling in preventing us from living an abundant and healthy life. If a nightmare is alerting us to a creeping neurosis, that doesn’t mean it isn’t relevant and just as crippling.As children we’re plagued by nightmares often. Children experience fear daily yet must continue to exist. The world they find themselves inhabiting is vast and those around them so much larger and stronger. Loving adults can help in offering moments of safety and respite but there are by necessity times when they cannot offer the assurance of safety so craved. Encouraging children to talk through their nightmares and offering them suggestions about how to imaginatively deal with the monsters can help a child to feel empowered and less threatened in their waking lives.Ignoring or discounting nightmares as “only dreams” doesn’t ultimately offer any help in dealing with them for like most forgotten dreams, they will simply return. The best way to deal with nightmares is to consider them. Do what we can to interpret the meaning of the symbols, characters, feeling and action. Imagine what the nightmare is asking of you the dreamer. Further, you might consider a couple of different endings to the dream. Often a nightmare is interrupted by an abrupt awakening triggered by our increased heart rate and breath; using your imagination envision what the ending might have been.Use the nightmare as a creative inspiration. Draw, paint or collage the images. Title your nightmare. The stories of Jekyl and Hyde, Frankenstein, and Dracula were all inspired by nightmares. When you describe a nightmare to someone, it is likely they will immediately identify and empathize with your experience. There is nothing quite like a sharing a nightmare to bring an uncommon level of intimacy into your social intercourse.Don’t shy away from your nightmares. They are important messages from your unconscious mind. It is highly likely it is an important message at that. If you don’t wish them to revisit, then give them creative expression. Ponder their messages and see what you might learn about how to remedy a troubling waking situation. At the very least you will find yourself awed at the majesty, grace and condensed form it has presented of a waking life situation that really does need more attending that than which you have been affording it.Kathleen Meadows, M.A. holds a Master’s degree in the Psychology of Religion and has a free dream dictionary online at