This portion of the Slam Rank was the easiest for me to do, as these five players were the only ones to have results on an international scale in 2015 and early 2016. Once I established who the top five were, I felt that placing them in order was relatively straightforward from there based on a combination of recency of results, peak performance and legacy. I hope you all enjoy the trailers I’ve made which will be embedded below.

#5 – RedRidingShrek – Puss In Boots, Black Knight, Pinocchio

#4 – Crumpet – Gingerbread Man, Black Knight

The model of consistency, RedRidingShrek first came into the spotlight with a 5-place finish at Slam in the Swamp, where he beat Longshore Drift, Mr. Misfire and XKCD_, using a nasty Black Knight. His results have only gotten better since he switched to Puss In Boots, with a third place finish at Shrek It Up 1 demonstrating that he can go toe-to-toe with the best players in the world. There’s an argument to be made that RedRidingShrek deserves higher on this list, and hopefully he’ll prove that in his next major appearance. Between his technical innovation and fluid style, RedRidingShrek truly deserves the title of best Puss In Boots in the world. Kreygasm.

#3 – Kirby – Red Riding Hood, Luna, Humpty Dumpty

One of the most respected players from the UK, the inventor of the Crumpet dash swoops into the fourth spot with a slew of impressive placements early in the metagame. These include 2place at Warwick CompSoc 4, 1place at Heir II the Throne and 4place at Slam in the Swamp. The only player to challenge Kirby’s dominance during the Warwick era, Crumpet earns this placement even in spite of a tournament drought lately. While it’s tempting to say he’s fallen off, Crumpet is a player who has shown resolve and timelessness in his playstyle, evidenced by the fact that Gingerbread Man’s metagame still revolves around airdash grab, and by his coaching RashAttack to a 2-place finish at the recent Heir 3 tournament, and if he puts his mind to it he could certainly make a return to glory.

#2 – Eirexe – Red Riding Hood, Gingerbread Man, Luna

With losses to very few players and the dominance he displayed during the metagame’s most volatile and formative periods, Kirby is without a doubt one of the best players of all time. While he has been less active recently, his tournament results speak for themselves – 1at Overstone 1 and 2, 1at Warwick CompSoc 4, 1at Aerial to the Thrown, 2at Heir II, and 2at Slam in the Swamp, to name a few. He also remains the only player to beat BoastingToast in a tournament set. The only reason Kirby is not ranked second is because he has not entered tournaments since Slam in the Swamp. With his incredible fundamentals and patience, Kirby gives off the aura that he could return to dominance at any point he wanted to, if only he decided to catch up on the metagame. Kirby is perhaps the most respected figure in the Shrek Super Slam community, and we thank him for all that he has done. Be sure to stick around for the end of Kirby’s combo video for a special surprise!

#1 – Boasting Toast – Red Riding Hood, Fiona, Gingerbread Man

The only player to take a game from Boasting Toast during more than one tournament set, and to my knowledge, one of only two to take a game from Boasting Toast in tournament until Heir 3, Eirexe is the ultimate lab monster of Shrek Super Slam. His technical prowess, patience and impeccable punish game made his Red Riding Hood one of the most feared characters in all of Shrek Super Slam prior to the ban, with Boasting Toast and Kirby the only players to demonstrate that they could compete with it. His notable tournament placements include 3at Slam in the Swamp and 2at Shrek It Up.

Banned – A Boasting Toast Combo Video from Shrek Boards on Vimeo.

The indomitable anime protagonist of competitive Shrek Super Slam claims his rightful place on the throne. It’s a fitting end to the Slam Rank and the most obvious placement on this list. At the time of writing this, Boasting Toast has only lost one set in tournament, to Kirby at Slam in the Swamp, a tournament which he came back and won anyway. He also consistently wins the Shrek It Up series of tournaments and remains an unstoppable force even after banning his own main and switching to Fiona. Notably, he also beat Crumpet with Gingerbread Man at Slam in the Swamp, demonstrating his mastery with the whole cast. BoastingToast has shown his ability to dominate the metagame at all points since he joined, no matter what the character and ruleset. His adaptability as a player and mastery of the game truly make Boasting Toast the best Shrek Super Slam player in the world.

Boasting Toast’s combo video is being delayed because YouTube is anal about processing Hoodwinked-related content and his combo video features a song from the Hoodwinked OST. Please understand.

Update: I got the video to take by hosting it on Vimeo, but unfortunately the quality got shrekt in the process and I don’t know for sure that it will stay up. For now, this is what we’ve got. I’ll fix it when I can be bothered to do so, but I’ve actually been sick the past few days and I’d like a chance to rest.