Here at Anticlown Media we hate clowns. With a passion. Unbridled passion. The kind you make love to a beautiful woman with. Or your hand. But, for those of you that weren't arguably fondled by Binky at your sister's birthday party, you can pay to have some creep dressed as a clown follow you around for three days and scare you.

Afraid of Clowns? Ever see a movie with a creepy clown and get scared to death? Believe it or not, there are people out there who like to be scared. This idea came to me when a friend mentioned they love scary movies and the thrill it gives them. This auction is for a 3 day thrill ride through your greatest fear! ~CLOWNS~!!!! I will dress up as a clown and scare you for 3 days STRAIGHT, everywhere you go, I will follow, dressed as a clown. When you least expect it - BOOM!!! There I'll be to creeper you out! This is something you will only want to experience once. LIVE your SCARIEST MOVIE SCENES! Included in this auction, is my travel expenses to wherever you live to give you 3 days of creepy, clowny excitement! BID NOW AND EXPERIENCE this once in a lifetime Thrill.... Are you Brave Enough? *This is meant for entertainment purposes only, no harm will come to you from this, just scariest thrill of a lifetime! Live a haunted house come to life for 3 entire days.

I'll tell you one thing: if a clown jumps out from behind a telephone pole while I'm walking to work he's gonna get his own size 30 shoved up his ass. Probably by someone tougher than me. Because I'll probably cry and run into traffic.



eBay Auction

Thanks to Jason, who's not afraid to admit he's afraid of clowns and really short people.