These are about as UN-gourmet as it gets. But they’re fun to make, easy, and go a long way toward promoting peace and tranquility among the male species.

Trim off the large obvious piece of fat that runs along the side of the meat. Next, cut strips less than 1-inch wide. Rotate the meat and cut into small bite-sized pieces. If you see any more large chunks of fat, gristle or long silvery membrane, cut them off. Sprinkle generously with kosher salt and freshly ground pepper. Toss the meat around a bit to thoroughly coat with the seasonings. Next, turn on your ventilation fan overhead. Heat the skillet over medium high to high heat. As the pan heats, add about 2 tablespoons butter to the skillet. Allow the butter to melt, then brown, before you add the meat. Place some of the meat in the pan in a single layer. It should sizzle loudly when it hits the pan – if it doesn’t, the pan isn’t hot enough. Don’t stir or disrupt the meat for 30-45 seconds. You want it to sizzle and brown on one side. Scoop as many steak bites as you can with your spatula and flip them over. Repeat until all the meat is turned. Cook for an additional 30 to 45 seconds—just long enough to sear the outside of the meat but NOT cook the inside. Remove the meat to a clean plate. Add a little more butter to the pan and repeat the cooking process with the next batch just as before. Lastly, when all the meat is nicely browned and removed to the plate, pour all that browned/blackened butter all over the meat. And enjoy!

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Today I’ll show you how to make my gourmet Steak Bites, which are actually about as UN-gourmet as it gets. But they’re fun to make, easy, and go a long way toward promoting peace and tranquility among the male species. They just love these simple suckers.

I did NOT just call MEN “simple suckers.” I called the STEAK BITES simple suckers.





Begin with a simple sirloin steak, and choose one without a lot of gristle. (Or “chisel” as Betsy once mistakenly called it.)





My local grocery store also sells it already cut up. They refer to this as “Beef Tips.” But it’s nothing but sirloin steak cut into small pieces.





Place the steak on a cutting board.





Trim off the obvious, large pieces of fat.





Cut strips less than 1-inch wide.





Then rotate the strips and cut small pieces.





If you see any large chunks of fat or gristle…





Go ahead and lop ’em off. Give it to your dogs and they’ll love you for life.

As if they don’t already.





I also like to trim off this silvery membrane, because it’s tough, man.





BEEF, beautiful BEEF!





Often I’ll sprinkle them with seasoned salt and lemon pepper, but today let’s just keep it simple: plenty of kosher salt…









And freshly ground black pepper. Yum.





Yes, I used this. But only because I took my regular grinder up to the Lodge where it will now live. And really—aside from looks, what does it REALLY matter? And hey—if guests were coming, I could always slap a coat of silver paint on it and it might pass for the real thing.

Yeah. I can see that happening. Didn’t silver paint kill the Tin Man? I’m steering clear of that stuff.

Now, the tricky thing about cooking steak bites is, you want to keep them relatively rare inside so they’ll be tender. At the same time, steak bites are most delicious when they’re nice and brownish black on the outside.

I’m going to achieve this in two ways:

1. Very, very hot pan

2. Butter





Toss the meat around a bit just to thoroughly coat with seasonings.





Now, heat the skillet over medium high to high heat. Just grin and bear it. Then open a window or turn on the ventilation on your stove. ‘Cause you’re gonna need it.





As the pan heats, add about 2 tablespoons butter to the skillet. The point here is to allow the butter to melt, then brown, before you add the meat.









Here, the pan is hot, the butter’s melted, and it’s getting nice and brown. (But not black.)





Place some of the meat in the pan in a single layer. It should sizzle loudly when it hits the pan—if it doesn’t, the pan isn’t hot enough.





Don’t stir or disrupt the meat for 30 to 45 seconds. You want it to sizzle and brown on one side.





When it’s time, scoop as many steak bites onto a spatula as you can…





And flip them over. Repeat until all the meat is turned.

Cook for an additional 30 to seconds—just long enough to sear the outside of the meat but NOT cook the inside.





Remove the meat…





To a clean plate…





And add another tablespoon of butter to the pan.





When it’s adequately browned, add the rest of the meat to the pan and repeat the cooking process.













Remove the meat to the plate.





Keep in mind that it will continue cooking just a tiny bit after you remove it. So don’t be afraid to take it out of the pan earlier than you think you should!





Notice that the meat is still pinkish red inside. That means flavor, tenderness, and bliss.





And now…for the best part.





Just pour all that browned/blackened butter all over the meat. This right here is where the men are separated from the boys.





And the women are separated from…the other women who are way too smart to eat anything like this.

I don’t fall into that category.





Being smart is highly overrated.

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Variation: If Marlboro Man weren’t in the picture, I would have deglazed the pan with a little red wine, then swirled in some butter…THEN poured the sauce over the top. But ranchers don’t like wine on their beef. It’s one of those things they never tell you.