Everyone else seems to be doing Premier League predictions, so with the new season just hours away, I thought I’d do mine. I’ve got absolutely no more insight into these things than the average fan, so don’t expect me to be even close to being accurate. In fact, you’re welcome to save this link and set a reminder on your phone to mock me for my stupidity in May next year.

Here’s how I think the league is going to shape up. It’s a long image, and if you scroll past it my explanations for these predictions at the bottom.

Where will Huddersfield Town finish in the Premier League?

I’m thinking we can finish thirteenth this season. This would put us safely clear of the relegation scrap and proving we’re capable of staying in the Premier League for a little while longer. This may be a tad optimistic but I think it’s possible.

I appreciate that most pundits and bookmakers expect Town to do down, and that makes sense when you look purely at the money side of things. However, the team spirit, David Wagner’s expert management, and the potential for our young squad to improve makes me think we’ve got enough to survive.

I’d also suggest having stable and competent ownership makes a big difference. Our Chairman isn’t going to sack our manager on a whim, the fans aren’t likely to start protests midway through games, and the players won’t suddenly turn on the club. Avoiding these kind of distractions makes a big difference when you’re into the business end of the season.

Who’s going to win the Premier League?

Most people are picking Manchester City, and that makes sense after their masterful performance last season. However, Liverpool are the team I most enjoy watching in the Premier League aside from Huddersfield Town and I think this could be their year. They need to go from a team that can beat anyone on their day, to a side that can consistently get results and I think their signings this summer will help them acheive this.

Manchester City are likely to be the main contenders for the league title, but I think they may struggle this year. Or at least not be quite as dominant as last season. I’ve noticed they seem vulnerable against teams that press them high up the field, like Liverpool and Town did last season. If other clubs play this way against them then Guardiola’s dedication to his footballing philosophy may lead them into difficulty.

Who will take the Champions League places?

I’ve mentioned above that I think Liverpool and Man City are the likely top two. I predict that Spurs and Arsenal will join them in the Champions League positions. While Tottenham haven’t made any high-profile additions this summer, they’ve got a core squad of players that are exceptionally good. If Harry Kane stays fit and in form then they could even mount a challenge for the title.

Arsenal are a bit of an unknown quantity and it would be easy to write them off now Wenger has gone. There’s an expectation they’ll go into a transition period like Manchester United did when Sir Alex Ferguson left. The two situations don’t compare though, as Fergie left a title-winning team and Wenger’s Arsenal had been underperforming for a while, but Unai Emery’s arrival should breathe new life into them.

I’d expect Chelsea to push Arsenal for the fourth Champions League spot, but I’m not sure they’ll manage better than fifth. They’ve got great talent in their squad, but it seems like their best players have all be angling for moves away this summer. Add that to a new coach coming in and changing the system and it’s possible that they’ll struggle at times.

I’ve been stunned by how miserable Jose Mourinho has looked in the media lately and it seems to me like he’s ready to implode at Manchester United. The things he says in the press about his players make him look like a spoilt brat and it’s hard to imagine it’ll be a happy dressing room. For this reason I’m thinking they’ll scrape a Europa League place at best.

Who will go down

I think Newcastle will go down this season. They’ve got a passionate and vocal group of supporters but if results go against them then they’ll turn on the ownership and it could make it harder for the players to perform on the pitch. Rafa Benitez did incredibly well with a fairly limited squad last season, I’m not sure he fancies having to do the same every year. If he gets a decent offer elsewhere, he may decide he’s had enough of Mike Ashley’s empty promises about money for transfers.

Southampton are the next team I’m tipping to go down, mostly because I don’t like Mark Hughes and I think he was lucky to avoid taking Southampton down last season. Prior to his appointment, Southampton had found some real gems as managers. Reverting to a familiar face from the managerial merry-go-round feels like a backward step and I think they’ll struggle despite having a good squad of players.

I really wasn’t sure who to pick as the third relegated team. Cardiff would be the obvious choice but I think they’ll be like Town were last season, and use the momentum from their promotion to cause a few upsets. Fulham have a good manager and a style of play that should translate well to the Premier League. So I’ve chosen Brighton because they were the team left at the end. I’ve no real reason to suggest they’ll go down, other than the seventeen teams above them look better equipped to survive, to me at least.

Who’s going to end up mid-table?

If you take out the top-six teams then it becomes incredibly hard to predict what’s going to happen, but I think Marco Silva will be able to guide Everton to a decent finish and get them playing some nice football.

West Ham, Leicester, Palace and Watford are all teams of a similar level of quality. They’re not likely to challenge for Champions League spots, but should be well clear of relegation too. Injuries to key players or a sudden loss of form could change that, but I think they’ll all be able to settle for mid-table mediocrity.

I think Burnley, Bournemouth and Wolves are going to avoid relegation but not manage to make it out of the bottom half. Burnley are going to have their already thin squad stretched by their European campaign, Wolves seem overrated to me (I may regret saying this later), and Bournemouth have been punching above their weight for a while now, but I think they’ll struggle to replicate a top-half finish again this season.

Think I’ve got it wrong? Tell me in the comments. (But please be nice!)