Oh, Louisiana legislature….

You may look more or less the same in your two-button blazers and your unattractive chambers, but you’ve changed.

You’ve changed, man.

You always said you were gonna buck the trend. Sure, you caved in on some stuff — important stuff like integration and public smoking. That kinda thing. That was totally okay. But you’ve stuck to your guns on other matters, proud of our state’s traditions and eager to force them on your children and their children’s children.

But now? Now y’all have legislated yourselves right outta kickbacks, fer chrissakes! You’ve taken away cockfighting, and you’ve tried your damnedest to pull up our sagging pants. You are essentially dismantling the crazy quilt of Louisiana’s cultural history and turning it into a double wedding ring of tasteful ecru damask and remnants of rose-colored satin. Where is your fabled sense of whimsy? Where, dammit?!

Then last week came the cruelest blow:

Louisiana legislators have approved a resolution calling for “privacy dividers” to be installed at urinals men’s public bathrooms. The resolution does not have the force of law. It will now be up to state health officials to amend Louisiana’s plumbing code to require the privacy partitions. The resolution was sponsored by Democratic state Rep. Mickey Guillory of Eunice. The reason, according to the resolution, is that “sexual offenders, sexually violent predators, and child predators can easily violate the privacy of others using urinals….” —more at WAFB

[ YES, THERE IS VIDEO! ]

Speaking on behalf of gay men and their bi-curious half-brethren everywhere: hasn’t Louisiana suffered enough? Must you add insult to injury?

I don’t even know who you are anymore.