UIG via Getty Images An Indian woman collecting cows manure to use as a fertiliser or combustible. (Photo by: Loop Images/UIG via Getty Images)

Cow dung may soon be the most sought-after product in the world, since it can almost cure everything. In fact, you may soon see The Great Khali advertising it, now that an RSS leader has claimed cow dung can give a tough competition to materials like Ambuja Cement—and all things that are strong enough to build walls.

If you think, we're kidding, consider this: recently, IIT Delhi received about 50 proposals from top research institutions across the country to explore benefits of panchgavya—a mixture of cow urine, cow dung, milk, ghee and curd.

So now, since there are too many uses of the humble cow dung, you may find it hard to keep up with all. But we've got your back. Here's a handy list of miracles cow dung can achieve, according to leaders of the RSS.

Building Bunkers

On Wednesday, Indresh Kumar, the chief of RSS's Muslim wing Muslim Rashtriya Manch, claimed that cow dung can be used to make bunkers. Yes, bunkers—that are supposed to be strong enough to ensure that bombs cannot kill the people inside. That.

According to Kumar, while the meat of a cow is poison, the dung it produces is very, very useful. Kumar insisted that since it's already used to build houses instead of cement, it can be used for bunkers too.

We are not sure if the Army is listening.

For Natural Beauty

About two years ago, at a rally organised by Bharatiya Gau Kranti Manch in Bhopal, as part of a nationwide campaign seeking death sentence for cow slaughter, one of the speakers said that Lord Krishna owes it all to cow dung. "Even when he was 120 years old, Lord Krishna looked like a 12-year-old because his soap was made from cow dung".

Following this, a Mumbai-based company went on to sell soap, toothpaste, floor-cleaner, hair oil, incense, shaving cream and face wash—all made of cow dung and urine.

To Protect Yourself From Radiation

76-year-old Shankar Lal, RSS's Akhil Bharatiya Gau Sewa pramukh, has tried and tested this out. Lal, along with other RSS workers, apply cow dung on the back of their cellphones to protect themselves from radiation. "It is fresh cow dung. I have put it to save myself from the harmful radiations of the cellphone. It works, believe me," he told The Indian Express in an interview.

He tried reasoning it out as well. "If cow dung can treat cancer, why can't it save us from a phone's microwaves?" (If you haven't heard of cow dun used to treat cancer, the loss is yours.)

But mind you, the gobar should only be from Indian desi cows and not western ones like Jersey or Holstein, as he warned.

Cow Dung Can Defuse Atom Bombs

A booklet released by the Muslim Rashtriya Manch claims that, apparently, cow dung can render hydrogen and atom bombs "ineffective". The Hindu also confirmed that the booklet said radioactivity does not affect a place painted with cow dung—or affects it only marginally.

The document was an attempt to persuade Indian Muslims to give up beef.

Rajasthan education minister Vasudev Devnani agreed as well. While talking about the scientific importance of cow dung during his visit at the Hingonia Cow Rehabilitation Centre, he said cow dung has a magical property that can indeed defuse bombs.

Cure For Cough And Cold

The Rajasthan education minister also added that cow dung contains Vitamin B that can relieve you from cough and cold. He said deficiency of vitamin B can lead to general weakness, a weak nervous system, and insomnia. And all this can be cured just by using one thing: Cow dung.

Pregnant Women Should Have It For Normal Delivery

The chief of RSS's Akhil Bharatiya Gau Sewa, who applies cow dung on his cellphone, also believes that it's a miraculous drug for pregnant women. "We make pregnant women eat cow dung and urine paste to ensure a normal delivery," he said in an interview.

Use It For Cremation

Recently, Gau Seva Parivar, an affiliate of the RSS had an idea for the Kolkata Municipal Corporation (KMC)—use of cow dung cakes in funeral pyres instead of firewood at government crematoriums.

They claimed that cow dung cake emits less pollutants compared to logs. "It also take less time to burn as compare to log (sic) because of less moisture. In cow dung cake the moisture is less than 5% but in firewood it is nearly 20%," Lalit Agarwal, the chief of Gau Seva Parivar told CNN-News18.

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And so the list goes on.

So important this cow dung is that the Union Ministry of Science and Technology has constituted a 19-member panel to conduct a detailed research on cow derivatives and their benefits.

The 'scientific panel' will include members from allied organisations of the Vishwa Hindu Parishad and the RSS as well as ex-CSIR chief RA Mashelkar.

We promise, we didn't make this up.

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