Single parenthood, especially single motherhood, is a devastating epidemic in the United States. The majority of child abuse perpetrators and welfare recipients are single mothers. The shocking rise of fatherless homes has precipitated an increase in violence, abuse, and crime. Statistically, the absolute best thing both biological parents can do for their children is commit to one another as part of a traditional nuclear family. (This does not require obtaining a marriage license, so long as an agreed upon long-term commitment between the two parties is established.) This is not to suggest that one should withstand extreme physical or psychological abuse in a relationship, but it will require her to take personal responsibility for her actions. It’s important that the following statistics be viewed with reason and objectivity, despite the sensitivity of this subject.

According to the National Center for Health Statistics, approximately 50% of marriages in the U.S. end in divorce, with nearly 80% of divorces being initiated by women. [1] Despite women predominantly filing for divorce, recent statistics show that more men have been physically abused by their partner than women. According to the National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey created by the Center for Disease Control (CDC) and U.S. Dept. of Justice (DOJ), in 2011 an estimated 5,365,000 men and 4,741,000 women were victims of intimate partner physical violence. [2]

In this same study, 36% of men claimed to have been the victim of sexual violence (coercion, unwanted sexual contact or experiences) by a partner(s) in their lifetime. Regarding psychological abuse, men are estimated to be victimized by their intimate partner equally as much as women. [2] It’s also important to note that men tend to not report abuse as frequently as women. Thus, their numbers will tend to be underrepresented in this and other abuse metrics.

Single Parent Household

Today, approximately one in three children live with a single parent. This accounts for a staggering portion of society and has incurred horrifying repercussions. Divorce filing statistics indicate single parenthood is primarily the mother’s choice, as a mere 3% of single moms are widows. Children from single-parent households are far more likely to live in poverty, be abused, commit aggression, go to jail, suffer from drug addiction and alcohol abuse, be the victims and perpetrators of sexual assault, drop out of high school, murder, commit suicide, run away from home or be homeless, etc.[3] The list goes on.

Fatherless homes

Nearly 1 in 3 children never or very seldom see their biological father. [3] Of the marriages that end in divorce, women are granted child custody 82% of the time. [4] Children in fatherless homes are far more likely to have behavioral disorders and suffer from anti-social, aggressive, and self-harming behavior. Over 70% of high school dropouts and juveniles in correctional facilities and chemical abuse centers come from fatherless homes. Of children exhibiting “behavioral disorders”, 85% come from fatherless homes and have a greater propensity for aggression. 80% of rapists motivated by anger come from fatherless homes. Tragically, nearly 2 in 3 children who commit suicide come from fatherless homes. [5]

To address the narrative of the rampant numbers of “deadbeat dads”, 75% of custodial mothers receive child support payments. Custodial mothers are also paid higher rates of child support than custodial fathers. Mothers fail to pay required child support more often than fathers. If one wishes to judge a non-custodial parent’s value based on how much child support he/she pays, then technically there would be a higher proportion of deadbeat mothers than fathers. [6]

Child Abuse

Children in households with both married biological parents are far less likely to suffer moderate and severe abuse than they are in single mother and parent-stepparent households. [7] Also, children are 6x more likely to live with the biological mother than the biological father. Perhaps abuse is more prevalent in single mother homes because the father isn’t there to help share the burden of rearing and providing for the child. As the mother experiences more stress and anxiety, it becomes more challenging to parent peacefully. Approximately one in five children live with their mother and stepparent. [8]

A child is more than 8x as likely to suffer moderate or serious abuse in a single parent with a partner household than in a household with both married biological parents. Conversely, he is more than 3.5x as likely to suffer moderate abuse and 4.5x as likely to suffer severe abuse in a single parent household than in a household with both married biological parents. [3] Therefore, one should advocate for both biological parents to live together as opposed to mere two-parent households.

The Role of the Media, State, and Culture

Television sitcoms have been normalizing the negative portrayal of men and fathers as ignorant and inept household figures for decades (in contrast, from the 1950’s-1980’s, the father was displayed as a wise leader and guide for his family). This portrayal is intended to conceal the positive father figure image. This is the media’s way of normalizing single parenthood and stigmatizing fathers as being unworthy while depicting mothers and women as superior. Fathers are mocked and ridiculed at least twice as much as mothers in sitcoms. [9] With children aged eight to eighteen spending a whopping 8-11 hours daily on screens, it’s no wonder this negative depiction of fathers has been deeply ingrained in their psyche. [10]

The State has also played a large role in breaking up of the nuclear family. Big Brother has taken the place of father and husband by subsidizing single-parent households whilst penalizing married households with higher taxes (as they tend to be in a higher tax bracket since they generally have higher incomes). Single-parent families account for 90% of Temporary Assistance for Needy Families (welfare) recipients. Half of single mothers are on food stamps, yet only 12% of married couples with kids are. [11] It is worth noting that the rate of children living in single-parent households has quadrupled since the 1960s (when State welfare dramatically expanded). The poverty rate drops 65% for women who marry the biological father of her children when compared to their jobless single mother counterparts. Alternatively, the poverty rate drops 38% for women who marry the biological father when compared to single moms who work part-time. [3]

Leftism and Feminism

The message that women “shouldn’t need (or sometimes even want) men” or that they “should be strong and independent without a traditional nuclear family” is promoted to the detriment of children. Unfortunately, alternative lifestyles (e.g. step/mixed, polyamorous, or homosexual families) have become increasingly vogue. Humans are biologically wired to nurture and foster strong bonds with their own offspring as opposed to someone else’s. The likelihood that one’s multiple-partners-coming-and-going-in-the-home escapades will crash and burn is a virtual guarantee. The probability that such a person will end up in poverty and on government assistance is a near statistical certainty. Neither are empowering to women!

In the United States, 52% of people approve of a woman being a single mother and believe one parent can bring up a child equally as well as both parents together. [12] However, nearly 50% of single mother households are in poverty, whereas only 11% of married couple families live in poverty. [10] As cultural acceptance of single-parent households increase, so too will their numbers.

Moreover, the medical community has shown its bias towards women and mothers in its published research. They have neglected to study the positive impact of a father’s presence in a child’s life and instead focus primarily on the negative impact of his absence. For example, research studies at PubMed on child and adolescent psychology reference “Mothers” over 5x more than “Fathers”, and “Maternal” over 16x more often than “Paternal”. Information and research on the importance of fathers being present are relatively absent. [13]

Personal Responsibility

Men and women should be very selective when deciding with whom to procreate. They should do everything in their power, whether it be counseling or other means of self-help, to work through communication and personal growth issues in order to keep their family intact.

Finally, women need to be held to the same standards of personal accountability as men. Often times fathers are held up to moral scrutiny (and rightly so) yet mothers are given a pass for their actions owing to their supposed “victim” or “oppressed” status.

The rate at which women disband their marriage is alarming because the vast majority of fathers do want to be in their children’s lives. Although the State makes it artificially easy to leave one’s spouse, the “safety net” provided is not worth increasing a child’s risk factors for the aforementioned slew of destructive behavioral issues and social hardships. Few things are more statistically certain than the traditional nuclear family’s supreme contribution to a child’s health and well being.

Sources:

[1] CDC. Divorcesource.com. Center for Disease Control: National Center for Health Statistics, 20 Jan. 2016. Web. 14 July 2017.

[2] Walters, Mikel, Michele Black, Melissa Merrick, Kathleen Basile, Matthew Breiding, Sharon Smith, Jieru Chen, and Mark Stevens. “National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey (NISVS): Summary of Findings for 2010.” PsycEXTRA Dataset (2010): 1-108. Center for Disease Control. Web.

[3] The Truth About Single Moms. Stefan Molyneux. Freedomain Radio, 2015. YouTube.

[4] “Custodial Mothers and Fathers and Their Child Support: 2009.” Custodial Mothers and Fathers and Their Child Support. United States Census Bureau, 2009. Web. 14 July 2017.

[5] U.S. Dept. of Justice. Justice Programs. What Can the Federal Government Do to Decrease Crime and Revitalize Communities? By Jeremy Travis and Steven Rickman. National Institute of Justice, Jan 1998. Web. 14 July 2017.

[6] United States Census Bureau. U.S. Dept. of Commerce-Economics and Statistics Administration. Custodial Mothers and Fathers and Their Child Support: 2011. By Timothy Grall. 2011. Print.

[7] U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. Administration for Children and Families. Child Maltreatment 2007. N.p.: National Child Abuse and Neglect Data System, 2009. Print.

[8] Bureau, US Census. “Data.” Historical Living Arrangements of Children. United States Census Bureau, 01 Nov. 2016. Web. 14 July 2017.

[9] McGee, David, and Bryce Hantla. “The Portrayal of Fathers in Popular Media.” Family Ministry. The Journal of Discipleship and Family Ministry, 09 Dec. 2013. Web. 14 July 2017.

[10] Foehr, Ulla, Ph.D, Donald Roberts, Ph.D, and Victoria Rideout. Generation M2: Media in the Lives of 8-to-18 Year Olds. Kaiser Family Foundation, Jan. 2010. Web. 14 July 2017.

[11] Bureau, US Census. Poverty Status, Food Stamp Receipt, and Public Assistance for Children Under 18 Years by Selected Characteristics: 2016. Digital image. America’s Families and Living Arrangements: 2016. U.S. Census Bureau, 2016. Web. 14 July 2017.

[12] “Mapping Family Change and Child Well-Being Outcomes: Attitudes Towards Voluntary Single Motherhood.” World Family Map 2015. Child Trends and Social Trends Institute, 2015. Web. 14 July 2017.

[13] “Mother vs Father Terms on PubMed.” National Center for Biotechnology Information. U.S. National Library of Medicine, n.d. Web. 14 July 2017.