SHOCKED Tour de France competitors have discovered that poor planning has led to a very mountainous route.

After a promising start to the trip, entrants have begun to complain that their enjoyment of the Tour has been spoiled by periods of intense uphill cycling.

Chris Froome said: “I don’t feel like I’m getting to experience the real France at all on this so-called Tour de France.

“Sadly the organisers have plotted a route that goes right through some of the hilliest parts of the country when there are much quicker flat roads. I was hoping maybe we could stop off at a vineyard or have a luxurious lunch at an authentic local brasserie, but we’re just on our bikes all day.

“I spent six months doing night courses in French and have barely been able to speak a word because I pass every French person I meet at 30 mph. I’ve barely even got to practice the subjunctive.”

Organiser Jean-Pierre LaFarge said: “We aim to pit man against nature and to push these supreme athletes to the very threshold of human endurance, but in retrospect maybe we should have at least had a cheese tasting on day two.”