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C is for Quantum

Questions toward an understanding of theoretical cookie physics:

Does the monster still derive pleasure from the flavor of the cookies each time they pass through?

Does any part of the digestive process occur in the cookies' transit through metaspace?

If so, when does that get too gross for the monster to eat the cookies?

Wouldn't the component ingredients of the cookies (the chocolate, the dough, etc.) break down chemically over time?

Wouldn't the cookies themselves break apart eventually from the structural stress of what is in effect an infinite fall?

Given the expansion of the universe and an infinite duration, shouldn't we expect that minute changes in the relative location of the two portals would eventually bring them out of alignment with each other, thus breaking the cycle of cookie and re-cookie?

Are the cookies a lie?

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