I must start this review with an admission. I have not the faintest clue what a “Radler” beer is. However, I will convince you that this knowledge is irrelevant, much like knowing what a scooter is.

This penguin has recently relocated north, in order to study a new species of humans, known as Queenslanderatas Simplisticus. Or so the Victorian humans told me, they were not exactly neurosurgeons themselves. While at my local “Bottle-O”, known to most of the world as a liquor store, I looked for a beer I had never tasted before.

I was faced with a dilemma.

XXXX Summer Edition, or Barecove Radler – infused with lemon and lime. My heart was set on trying something new, but this seemed like choosing between being teabagged by a bikie, or watching a Hugh Grant movie. A very large contrast, but I don’t feel like admitting to either of them.

I chose Hugh Grant.

Barecove is awful from start to finish. I’m not going to spend a lot of time trying to explain it, but it is like drinking a watered down Corona through a lemon and lime straw. The straw is a similie for the inappropriateness of this addition to a beer in any circumstance.

Most right thinking drinkers will hate this beer. If you drink this beer and hate it, give yourself 10 points.

Two types of people will love this beer, and they should be avoided at all costs.

The first type are Corona drinkers. Only ditzy females, effeminate men, or a hardened drinker of lemonade fall into this category. The radler will taste very familiar to the Corona with lemon and lime they drink in tactless clubs while talking about American Idol.

The other type of person who will enjoy this beer is someone who hates beer. I don’t mean this in a “I only drink vodka and OJ” type of way, rather like “I hate alcohol and all people who drink it, they should suffer like me”.

This is the perfect beer for fundamentalist Muslims and Christians. Enough said.