(I’m in a class about classical religion and we’re discussing Plato’s Timaeus and Pheto dialogues. At this point, our professor, who is extremely energetic, is asking us about physical bodies and souls.)

Professor: “So, why don’t you believe your body is you?”

Student #1: “Well… I’m a man, so obviously I’m a fish who got his act together.”

Professor: “All right, you’re a sea bass on the up and up! How many of you think you have souls?”

(At this point, less than half the class raises their hands, much to the professor’s confusion.)

Professor: “So… why don’t you think you have souls?”

Student #2: “Because I sold mine to the devil in order to finish my senior thesis.”