Jill Zarin once declared that her friendship with Bethenny Frankel was “done,” but now the former Real Housewives of New York City star is ready to reconnect.

“It’s definitely better than it’s ever been since that whole thing happened, but she doesn’t have time for me, and I’m sad about that,” Jill told Jeff Lewis on his Radio Andy SiriusXM show on Thursday, May 30, about her friendship with Bethenny. “But I understand it … I really do.”

Former besties Jill and Bethenny had a falling out during season 3 of RHONY in 2010. After the Skinnygirl CEO accused Jill of being jealous of her newfound success, the Zarin Fabrics boss claimed her costar wasn’t there for her during her husband Bobby Zarin‘s cancer scare. After Bobby lost his battle with cancer in January 2018, the two women finally reconnected, but things were never the same between them.

While Jill left the Bravo hit after season 4, she has made several guest appearances over the years. During season 11, which is currently airing, the rug designer has been in scenes with everyone besides Bethenny. She told Lewis on Thursday that she would like to return in an official friend role.

“What I bring now, is a very different Jill and I think that the fans want to see that,” she explained. “Every single day since I left the show I get tweets, comments … ‘Come back, when are you coming back?’ and I feel like an obligation to satisfy that to a certain extent.”

“I’m calmer, I try to think first and I try to not take things so personally. There were definitely roads that I took the wrong way throughout the whole thing where you could go left or right,” Jill continued. “I know that, maybe, I should haven shown up at her apartment when this whole thing went down and just said, ‘What are we fighting about, let’s just make up.’ I just let it fester. … I don’t have the ego I have.”

Jill also pointed out that Bethenny is “different” than when the show first started in 2008.

“Life has treated her in a strange way. It’s given her a lot of rewards, but it’s also punished her,” Jill said. “Its rewarded her financially, but…”

Lewis then interjected, “In the form of Jason Hoppy, I mean Jesus Christ. That’s, like, the worst divorce ever.”

“I would have never expected it to go on so long and so horrible,” Jill said, referring to Bethenny’s bitter custody battle with her ex-husband over their 9-year-old daughter, Bryn. “And the only victim there is the daughter.”

Despite it all, Jill concluded that Bethenny looks “happy.”

“She’s got a guy in Boston, she got her own place,” she explained, mentioning to Bethenny’s boyfriend, Paul Bernon. “So she doesn’t have time for me. I’d like to think we could go back to where we were, but you can’t.”