For those who don’t know me I LOVE social media. I had a Myspace page back in the early 2000’s and was so reluctant to join a new social media site called “Facebook” back in 2005 because I was pretty sure Myspace was better. I recently celebrated my 6-year Twitter anniversary; I happily left the land of blackberry to get an iPhone and use Instagram- and I had a hi5, and friendspring account way back when. The only thing I might love more than social media is love. So it’s hard for me to put this out there, but is it possible that social media sabotages relationships?

Social media allows us to create connections with old friends, stay updated with current ones and even make new connections. It also puts our lives on display to whoever we allow, and that can be good or bad. Some social media websites allow us to document our lives in a sense, it’s a virtual scrapbook where we post important events, sometimes tragedies, general good times with our family and, of course, our loved ones. That can be helpful because we live in a fast-paced world where sometimes we might forget to appreciate the little things in life, and a relationship post on a social media site can remind the world (and us) how lucky we are to have this loving, perfect, amazing partner, right? Or does posting about our partners place unneeded attention, and unnecessary stress on the relationship?

Think about reality TV shows, people put their personal lives on display for the world to watch and comment, laugh and cry with them. It is entertaining, but a trend for a lot of these reality tv couples is that their relationships explode in their face. Now maybe these relationships were already doomed and being under the watchful eye of the public was just a catalyst, but can’t the same thing be said for couples who put their lives on display with social media? The idea is the same, but the process is a little different with social media,it’s more instantaneous – people post relationship pictures, people like pictures… instant gratification and reinforced solidarity within the relationship(at least that’s how we pretend it happens). But what happens when the whole world (or your 200 followers) watches and the relationship ends? Isn’t there that dread of deleting pictures from your account, people notice that, they might not say anything, but they see it. It might not be the worst thing about the end of the relationship, but it is one of the most public things that occurs.

How about the couples who don’t post about their relationship? Is that relationship doomed as well? Does one partner wonder if the other is hiding something? Maybe they have a secret relationship with someone on one of their social media accounts- or maybe they are just private people who don’t want outside speculation or commentary on their relationships. Or maybe they don’t want to lose followers (this is a real concern for some people!), people might stop posting compliments under their pictures or sending private messages that boost one’s confidence. Maybe the real problem is that we live in a society that has made us paranoid about the power of social media. The only confirmed truth is that technology only has the power that we give it. Let me know what you think by leaving a comment below

… all media, from the phonetic alphabet to the computer, are extensions of man that cause deep and lasting changes in him and transform his environment.- Marshall McLuhan Canadian philosopher of communication theory