AliceRR Wed 15-May-19 10:11:23

I am prepared for honest answers on this. I’m not sure what to do for the best.



I went on mat leave earlier this year when I was 38 weeks pregnant. Weekend the baby was due, she died. She was stillborn a few days later. I am devastated obviously and I’m still on mat leave as I’m not quite ready to go back yet. I had thought three months might be reasonable but it has been a bit that now and I’m not ready. For a while it took time for things to sink in and we haven’t even got PM results yet. I work in a professional / demanding role so once I’m there need to be able to fully focus on what I’m doing.



I had originally planned to take a year off on mat leave and that would have been fine as DH works too. After we lost the baby he worked for a bit but ultimately left as he’s also in a high stress environment and his boss has been VERY unsympathetic. He’s looking for another job.



I get full pay for part of mat leave then half pay and then statutory. Put simply I cannot afford to pay all the bills on just my half pay. If I had full pay I could just about cover everything ‘til DH gets a job.



We don’t have loads of savings so it’s not like we can just live off of that.



I’ve considered whether I would be better taking the time off sick (GP actually offering sick note is what made me consider it) as I get something like 6 months or 12 months full pay.



I should say I am the kind of person who usually doesn’t take time off sick and often don’t even use all my annual leave as I have always prioritised work over everything else.



I am also wanting to go back ASAP, maybe in a month or two, so I’m trying to mentally prepare myself for that but I know I cannot be sure I’ll feel ready.



AIBU or a CF to consider taking time off sick? Is my employer likely to view it badly? Should say I am good at my job and well respected where I work. I expected promotion this year so don’t want to change their view of me an an employee.



In a way sick leave seems to more appropriately reflect why I’m off than mat leave but if it’s likely to be viewed badly then I’d be more inclined to use the limited savings we have and hope DH gets a job soon but even then that won’t last v longs



Sorry for long post and TIA.