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The Prime Nightwatchman of Australia appeared on popular CBS panel show, The Project, last night in Melbourne were he answered claims made by the nation’s leading media commentator, Waleed Aly, that he planned to use Islamophobia as a political weapon.

During the discussion, both Waleed and Scott made a point of interrupting each other to the point where the ordinary Betootan simply tuned out and chose to chromecast a pirated version of the True Detective season instead.

Mr Aly opened the interview by letting the Nightwatchman set the agenda, to which he replied:

“Waleed, let me interrupt your question. Feel free to intrrupt my answer in a minute.”



As the interview dragged on, Waleed asked Scott if he was going to do a preference deal with controversial paramilitary group, One Nation, to which he replied ‘no’.

However, when asked if the Liberals were going to put One Nation last on their how-to-vote cards, the Nightwatchman cleared his throat and began:

“Son, we live in a world that has walls, and those walls have to be guarded by men with guns. Who’s gonna do it? You? You, Peter Helliar? I have a greater responsibility than you could possibly fathom. You weep for asylum seekers, and you curse the Liberal Party. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know. That all those deaths at sea, while tragic, probably saved lives. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves lives. You don’t want the truth because deep down in places you don’t talk about at parties, you want me on that wall, you need me on that wall. We use words like fair, go, job. We use these words as the backbone of a life spent defending something. You use them as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the jobs and growth that I provide, and then questions the manner in which I provide it. I would rather you just said thank you, ScoMo, and went on your way, otherwise, I suggest you pick up an F88, and stand a post. Either way, I don’t give a damn what you think you are entitled to…”

As a veil of silence covered the studio, Waleed interrupt the Nightwatchman.

“Put Prime Minister, we don’t have any walls. We are girt by sea. What walls are you talking about?”

The Nightwatchman exhaled audibly through his nose.

“You don’t understand.”

The full interview is available on CBS’ Australian streaming service, TenPlay.

More to come.