“I hated every minute of training, but I said, ‘Don’t quit. Suffer now and live the rest of your life as a champion.” ~ Muhammad Ali

A colleague noticed this week that I had set out on an early morning ride before work, and was commending me for my effort. Then he asked me if it felt good. I couldn’t help myself when I answered him honestly.

“Nope,” I said. “Honestly, if it felt good, I would have been doing it all along. If it felt good, I wouldn’t look like this.”

I was surprised to learn that Muhammad Ali had much the same sentiment about training for his boxing bouts. But it makes sense: champions train hard, and hard training means experiencing pain and suffering while you pursue a worthy goal. The thing that sets champions apart from everyone else is that they keep their eye on that goal, while the rest of us focus on the training.

Independence Day

I had the day off, like most people, so I scheduled a long ride for myself – 20 miles was the plan. I set out before sunrise and headed south, into a moderate wind that pushed back at me gently, but also kept me cool, so I didn’t really mind. By the 5 mile mark I was pretty pooped, but after a bit of rest and some stretching I was good to go again. In Clearwater and Largo, the Pinellas County trail winds around a bit, so I found myself coursing through some pretty cool streetscapes. I love that about riding here – you can find yourself transported between rural and urban scenery very quickly, so my rides have yet to get monotonous.

I reached West Bay Drive in Largo and felt like I needed to turn around. My goal was to hit Ulmerton Road, about a mile and a half further south, but I had already blasted through the halfway point for my mileage goal, and figured it’d be a good place to stop.

The ride home was much easier with a tailwind. I logged 22 miles in 2:16:00.

Why This Ride Was Important on Independence Day

I have set up big goals for myself, and this ride helped me reach some of those goals. The distance itself was important, but the mental breakthrough has been even more important.

I didn’t want to quit. I wanted to prove to myself that I could do it, and when I reached West Bay Drive and sat down for a minute, I cried. In so many other areas of my life, I just give up when things get hard. Now, even though I was riding into the wind for the past hour, I kept pedaling, kept pushing, kept telling myself that the champion inside of me needs to be set free. To some extent, he was.

I wanted to prove to myself that I could do it, and when I reached West Bay Drive and sat down for a minute, I cried. In so many other areas of my life, I just give up when things get hard. Now, even though I was riding into the wind for the past hour, I kept pedaling, kept pushing, kept telling myself that the champion inside of me needs to be set free. To some extent, he was. I felt like I was experiencing freedom again. For more than two years I have been a slave to some pretty insidious forces in my life. I had a massive mental and emotional breakdown, and turned to food as my new drug of choice. Now, I am becoming my old self again, and finding that I am even stronger because of the journey. I felt like Tim Robbins’ Andy Dufresne in Shawshank Redemption, when he stood in the creek, hands raised in the air. “Andy Dufresne – who crawled through a river of shit and came out clean on the other side,” Morgan Freeman says in the movie. The crawl is worth the clean.

For more than two years I have been a slave to some pretty insidious forces in my life. I had a massive mental and emotional breakdown, and turned to food as my new drug of choice. Now, I am becoming my old self again, and finding that I am even stronger because of the journey. I felt like Tim Robbins’ Andy Dufresne in Shawshank Redemption, when he stood in the creek, hands raised in the air. “Andy Dufresne – who crawled through a river of shit and came out clean on the other side,” Morgan Freeman says in the movie. The crawl is worth the clean. This ride was completely for me. I have spent a lifetime doing things for everyone else and subordinating myself in the process, and am often still guilty of that. But, to focus completely and totally on me, and feel good about it – that’s a kind of freedom that I have never known before.

There are no fireworks that can represent these new feelings of freedom. Really, it’s best represented for me by the wind in my face, while I make little circles with my feet, mouthing the words to some favorite songs, or laughing along with podcasts while I ride. No deep thoughts, no guilt, no shame. Independence Day indeed.