Why Internet Friends Matter

You don’t need to meet someone for them to change your life.

When I was about 9, I stumbled across a Dragonball Z role-playing game community on Yahoo! Groups. I was a hardcore DBZ fan as a kid, and we would make up characters and interact with each other through asynchronous stories about them over email (ladies, I know what you’re thinking — yes, I am available). It was my first experience with online communities, and I ended up befriending a few people from the group.

Since the day I came across that group, I’ve been enamored with the Internet’s ability to connect people from across the world around common interests. I graduated from Dragonball Z RPGs to mock depth charts in Detroit Lions forums, and eventually to striking up one-to-one conversations with the authors of blogs I frequented. As I got involved in tech and entrepreneurship, this only accelerated — messaging people I found interesting on Quora became at least a weekly habit in 2011.

When I would mention the latter activity to friends, the response was typically, “What the hell? Why?” The only answer I ever felt I needed was, “Because they said something interesting, and I had something I wanted to tell them.” It wasn’t until recently that these people actually started to profoundly impact the trajectory of my life.

Semil Shah helped us get our first TechCrunch article (which helped establish early traction), well before I eventually met him in person. I cold emailed him about an article he wrote and asked for his advice on a super early incarnation of Fetchnotes.

Geoff Lewis was actually one of the most influential people in my decision to leave school. I messaged him on Quora to ask his advice on early acquisition interest we had received, also well before we met in person. He was one of the few people willing to tell me what I needed to hear, not what I wanted to hear.

Dan Shapiro and Chris Devore were both pretty much the driving force behind why we applied to Techstars (and gave us lots of help in the process). I reached out on the same premise as Geoff, and I’ve still never met them. We eventually landed in Boston rather than Seattle, but in many ways it’s still thanks to them.

Joey Flores and I have traded dozens of intros and pieces of advice on anything from recruiting to fundraising to product. He’s also a Quora friend I’ve never met, but we’ll vouch for each other stronger than most people I know in real life.

The list goes on and on. Moreover, since I fell into startups in 2010-2011, many of the random people I connected with when they were just starting out have since announced major financings, exits and more. No matter how long it’s been, I always send a quick congratulations email and tell them how happy I am to see them kicking ass. It’s kind of like when you hear an indie band you knew before they were big on the radio, but more personal.

When you’re a 20-year-old in Michigan just discovering the world of entrepreneurship, these people are everything. That’s not to say I didn’t have role models and mentors where I lived — I can name at least 5 people in Ann Arbor alone that I credit with making me the entrepreneur I am today. But when you live between the coasts, you often need to look elsewhere to get an experienced perspective on tactical issues or get in front of major movers and shakers.

Over the holidays, Joey sent me a letter and custom mug that said “I heard them way before you.” It was the nicest gift I had ever received from someone I had never met, and I root for his company like crazy because of gestures like that.

I heard Earbits before you!

So I raise my Earbits mug to my Internet Friends. You know who you are, even if we eventually met in person, and you’re amazing.