by Saintmort Guilty Pleasure – Mac & Me

Kids are idiots.

There I said it. We were all thinking it. Every single one of us at one time was a kid and at that time we were an idiot. Some people try to pretend they weren’t idiots. They say things like “That movie is terrible, even when I was a kid I knew it was bad”. No you didn’t. You’re a liar. At that time you enjoyed the taste of your own boogers and walked around with your bowel movements swimming around your ass. Your ability to have ‘taste’ in things was weak at best.

I’m not exempt from this “kids are idiots” thing. Because when I was a kid I thought Mac & Me was a better movie than E.T. I want to say that I don’t still feel this way (because I really don’t) but I’ve also realized that I own Mac & Me on both DVD and VHS yet I own no copies of E.T. so… maybe I do still believe that. Some people never stop being an idiot.

Mac & Me isn’t so much a movie as it’s a 90 minute commercial for McDonald’s starring a Mysterious Alien Creature (aka MAC) and a boy in a wheelchair. But I’m getting ahead of myself right now, let’s break this down a little better.

The movie opens on MAC’s home planet. Mac and his family are transported to Earth while searching for food and immediately break free from the laboratory that captured them. Mac gets separated from his family and ends up in the car of the Cruise family as they are moving into a new home.

Eric (a handicapped boy) discovers Mac and makes it his goal to help Mac reconnect with his family and return to their home planet. Actually I’m going to stop explaining the plot, if you’ve never seen it just think of the plot of E.T. it’s basically the same plot. Just with MAJOR product placement.

You see, remember that iconic Reese’s Pieces moment in E.T.? Well , imagine if that scene happened every 5 or 10 minutes and you’ll start to understand how bad the produce placement is. I mean for starters the alien is named after a McDonald’s sandwich, he survives off of Skittles and Coca-Cola and best of all there’s a giant dance sequence (while MAC’s disguised as a bear) in a McDonald’s (featuring Ronald McDonald).

I’m not saying that subliminal messages like this work. But I just took a break from writing to pick up chicken McNuggets. People will say this wasn’t product placement because the filmmaker says they never received payment from any of the products that appear in the movie. That’d be easier to believe if you didn’t have this trailer.

You see this film has bad reputation, but much like Joan Jett I don’t give a damn. I love and embrace this movie, but not just for the so bad, it’s good quality (although it helps). I remember always loving the design of Mac, even though he’s terrifying looking and has DSL constantly puckered on his face.

I guess it’s impossible for me to not mention the cliff sequence. If you’re not familiar with the scene I speak of, you’ve definitely never seen the movie. As I said earlier Eric is in a wheelchair, when he first sees Mac he chases him (well… wheels at him) suddenly he loses control and begins wheeling down a cliff. Without warning we get this incredible shot of a manniquinn strapped to a wheelchair falling into the water below. Mac of course saves Eric and their friendship begins to bloom. Don’t believe me? Here’s the infamous moment

The clip has developed a cult following when it became a running gag on Conan O’Brien’s show to play this clip whenever Paul Rudd was on (Even though he has absolutely nothing to do with the film, the biggest name in the film is either Jennifer Aniston as an uncredited extra or Ronald McDonald as himself). Perhaps if Paul continues doing this we’ll eventually see the Mac & Me sequel since the movie does promise that they will be back!