Improving Journalism: The Washington Post Is Changing Its Slogan To ‘Democracy Dies In Darkness, Fascism Dies In Light, Read The Washington Post Each Day To Make Your Brain All Right’

In 2017, The Washington Post adopted the slogan “Democracy Dies In Darkness.” It was a bold message affirming their mission to speak truth to power—and today, that slogan has been improved even further. On this morning’s front page, the paper once again changed their motto to “Democracy Dies In Darkness, Fascism Dies In Light, Read The Washington Post Each Day To Make Your Brain All Right.”

What an inspiring message. This is what quality journalism looks like!

In an editorial explaining the change, the Post wrote “Although our old slogan explained that democracy dies in darkness, it failed to also impart that fascism dies in light or that the public should read The Washington Post every day to make their brains all right. Our new and improved tagline adequately clarifies that when dictatorship rears its ugly head, onward forth our brave reporters tread. Through misinformation’s dreary fog, we march to the First Amendment’s valiant drumbeat, till each pertinent fact has been logged and printed upon our broadsheet.”

Wow. The Washington Post will stop at nothing to provide people with the information they need to understand what’s really going on in our country — and now they have a new slogan to prove it.

“Ne’er shall we falter, afraid to break a story,” continued the WaPo article. “Our editors will correct all typos and achieve eternal glory. Hush now, and listen for that approaching growl of beast! ’Tis the wolf of autocracy, hungrily stalking freedom through Washington, D.C.’s gloom-shrouded night. To thwart the hound’s bloodthirsty feast, our reporters look for scoops that will ignite the lantern of information’s light.”

“Do not mistake this toast for an idle boast,” added the letter from the editors, “for the gleaming hoard of Pulitzers upon our shelf more than speaks for itself.”

“That is why we felt it was time to update our slogan again,” said the editorial in closing, stating that “we vow to defend the fourth estate with every last drop of blood that flows within our veins, and vex corrupt politicians with unending pains. We are the shield of knowledge that turns aside the arrow of lies, we are truth’s dauntless centurion patrolling the stalwart ramparts of your mind, protecting your intellect from censorship with each complex issue we summarize. We believe this vital goal is aptly summed up by our new catchphrase, a heroic creed which The Washington Post shall live up to forever and always.”

Wonderful! Now when people read The Washington Post’s motto, they’ll have a better idea of the important journalistic ideals the paper stands for. In these tumultuous political times, using the light of truth to kill fascism and make Americans’ brains all right is more important than ever. Thank you for leading the charge, WaPo!