Bill Belichick walks into the Patriots media room wearing shorts, sneakers, and a light windbreaker adorned with a Patriots logo. It’s late August, still plenty of time for the New England weather to get cold and the famed “Hoody” to come out. TV and print reporters quiet their conversations as photographers hit record on their cameras. In 10 days, the Patriots will unveil their fifth Super Bowl banner at Gillette Stadium. That’s the least of Belichick’s concerns on this day. He has to figure out a way to get his roster down to 53 players by Saturday, while preparing for a fourth preseason game in just three days, but with the season opener against the Chiefs staring at him right in the face.

“Alright, another busy week,” he begins the press conference.

I’m a local TV anchor and reporter for WPRI-TV, the CBS and FOX affiliate in Providence, R.I. For some reason I decide to ask the first question following his monologue. Something about the different approach this year in the NFL to only having one cut down day.

His response: ‘It’s fine.”

To bookend the press conference, I ask the final question about he and offensive coordinator Josh McDaniels adjusting the offense now that Julian Edelman is done for the season with an ACL tear.

This response elicits a full two minute detailed reponse.

Welcome to a Bill Belichick press conference. A lot of short answers. A lot of long answers. Plenty of death stares and yes, even a few smiles. They’ve been played out on television for the last 17 years. Belichick is portrayed as a grumpy, curmudgeonly and surly. Much of the time he is just that. Other times he can be a joy.

“It depends on the day and it depends on his mood, says Mike Reiss of ESPNBoston, who has covered Belichick for his entire coaching tenure in New England. “He can have the best press conference in the NFL if he’s in a good mood or some of the worst if his mood isn’t right.”

Here are some rules to abide by if attending your first Bill Belichick press conference and want a reasonable answer.

-Never ask about injuries.

-Never ask about the past or the future (Belichick is always in the now).

-Try not to ask about anything that is not pertinent to this week’s opponent.

-Don’t ask a question that would compromise his team’s competitive advantage.

So what’s left, you ask?

Do your homework. If you ask a smart football question you will get a decent answer. And make sure you ask the question with confidence and be ready for a response if you get a two word answer or a blank stare. Also, there is a long almost uncomfortable silence in between questions, so there is plenty of time to jump in, unlike a Tom Brady presser where the questions come fast and furious. Be ready to dive in.

“If you ask a smart question, more often than not you will get a smart answer,” says Jeff Howe, the Patriots beat reporter for the Boston Herald. “You have to be prepared.”

In a standard regular season week, Belichick usually speaks to the media in person on Wednesdays and Fridays. Wednesday is the first day back with the team as he prepares the game plan for that week’s opponent. As Belichick is in full preparation mode, generally the last thing he wants to do is address the media.

“If in the team meeting he is not messing around, he wants to impart the same tenor with the players as with the media,” says Tom E. Curran of Comcast SportsNet New England. “He’s trying to send a message with his tenor.”

By Friday, the game plan is in and the team is wrapping up the final day of practice. Most of the work is done and that is where you find a more relaxed Belichick. On Friday mornings, most of the TV cameras are gone–the herd of media that was there on Wednesday is replaced by what Belichick calls his “hardcore” beat reporters left. This is where Belichick often times gives you a history of the game. Do you want to know about the evolution of the nickel defense, or how good Lawrence Taylor was with the Giants? Go to a Friday press conference. There is a lot of football talk.

See, Belichick is a football encyclopedia and historian. The son of a coach and a teacher, Curran says Belichick is one of the most inquisitive people he’s ever met. If you ask a question looking to learn more about football, whether it’s tactics or game planning, he will generally oblige. “He’s also self-deprecating with what he doesn’t know,” says Curran.

Belichick’s go-to joke revolves around social media, which he clearly isn’t into. “Insta-face” he calls it to a room full of laughter. The rare Belichick joke gets a lot of laughs because they are as rare as a Tom Brady interception.

Belichick’s approach with the media in New England is tolerated because of his five Super Bowl rings and the respect he’s earned. It was a different story at his previous stop in Cleveland, where he lacked the Super Bowl credentials as a head coach but was still tough with the media.

By in large, unless you are a football fanatic or a Patriots fanatic, the Belichick press conference can be boring. WEEI radio has made a comedy bit out of the whole process. On Friday mornings, the hosts of Kirk and Callahan will play the press conference in real time, while mocking the reporter’s boring questions and Belichick’s subsequent boring response.

Many print reporters who are trying to get quotes and information for the endless amount of content they are expected to produce in this age of 24/7 media coverage ask a lot of football-centric questions. After all, they are covering a football team; they are in fact “Doing Their Job.” “What have you seen from Trey Flowers?” “What have you seen from Marcus Cannon?” Meanwhile, TV reporters usually ask more big picture questions to fulfill the 15-20 second soundbite they are looking for.

Mark Dondero, my colleague at WPRI-TV, often times breaks up the monotony of a Belichick press conference with a question that tries to humanize the stone-faced football coach. When Belichick became a grandfather last year, Dondero asked him if he plans to tell his grandchild to “Do Your Job. Eat your carrots.” Belichick’s response? “Hopefully Not.” But with a smile. Dondero has asked Belichick about his Christmas list, favorite Halloween candy, Bruce Springsteen concerts, Nantucket Magazine covers and even his relationship with Donald Trump. Often, he gets a legitimate response. Other times, he is shut down. But that exchange is making the radio airwaves and headlines the next day.

“As a TV reporter, I feel like Bill’s press conference could use some livening up. I use the football stuff for my stories but you want something more colorful. It doesn’t matter what the answer to the question is, the viewer is sitting there and thinking how is this guy asking this question? They are captivated by the question.”

Regardless of where you land in the sports media pantheon, Belichick treats all reporters equally. Whether you are Sal Paolantonio or a summer intern, he will show you the same respect answering your question. And even if you’ve covered the team for the entirety of Belichick’s run in New England like Reiss and Curran have, he isn’t afraid to shoot you down too.

“He treats the media the same way he treats the players. There are no favorites,” says Reiss. “It’s a true meritocracy.”

Part of the reason the Patriots have been so successful is that Belichick keeps a consistent approach. He’ll chew out Tom Brady on the field just as fast as the 53rd man on the roster. When the national reporters come for the playoff runs, the inevitable “how great is Tom Brady” questions get asked and Belichick will praise the future Hall of Famer, but always includes the other quarterbacks or guys on the roster in his response.

And Belichick knows he can use these media sessions to send out a message. But that doesn’t mean he will ever lie or mislead the media. Even in a contract standoff with Super Bowl hero Malcolm Butler, he’ll still praise the play of the cornerback.

“He doesn’t say anything he doesn’t mean or doesn’t want to get back to the players. But he won’t blow smoke about a player and give him a good quote to make him feel good,” says Howe. As Belichick would say – It is what it is.

For a guy who speaks monotone, Belichick has illicited some memorable press conferences. Back in early 2014 when the Patriots were struggling and were blown out on national television on Monday Night Football to the Chiefs, he repeatedly said “On to Cincinnati,” as reporters tried to ask him about a quarterback controversy. The Patriots went on to win the Super Bowl that year.

Later that season, with Deflategate just a few days old, Belichick was fiery and passionate as he tried to defend the honor of his team and alleged deflation of footballs with a “My Cousin Vinny” reference. “I would not say I’m the Mona Lisa Vito of the football world like she was in the car expertise area, alright.”

Belichick also seems more relaxed on site of the Super Bowl. With daily media obligations he seems more at ease than during a regular season game. Prior to Super Bowl XLIX against the Seahawks he even told former linebacker Jerod Mayo’s daughter, what his favorite puppet was.

When the Patriots play the Giants in their preseason finale, the approach to the post game press conference is different. The game just happened. All the questions are football questions. And as the season moves along, there will be more hooded sweatshirts, short answers, and awkward silences in the media room. Reporters will ask questions, and Belichick will respond with either two word answers or long and insightful rambles that can enlighten even the most knowledgeable football fan.

He’s doing his job, and the media is doing ours.