Part I: Prelude to the reviewPart II: The review________________________________Part II read a review on this book today and decided I had to buy it right away. I consider myself somewhat of an introvert, even though not everyone around me agrees on that, because you know, I talk to people and can be pleasant at the same time. Convincing people there's more to the introvert-extrovert distinction than that hasn't always proven easy.I was hoping this book would prove my point, at the very least for me.I went to the Waterstones branch in Brussels, which is a ten minute walk from where I work. I had to be back in thirty minutes, giving me ten minutes at the store itself to look for the book. Yes, when I said "right away" earlier, I meant right away. Not half a day could wait.I go in the store and proceed up to the first floor to check out the non-fiction segments. I do not find the book. I put my head and neck in every possible angle, scanning the shelves from every possible perspective, to no avail. Surely, I must be looking in the wrong shelf. Maybe it's downstairs, because they have a table of bestselling non-fiction there as well, so maybe it's there. Yes! I make my way back down and I look and I find nothing. I've been in the store for at least 7 minutes now, so running out of options, I approach two people working for the store, rudely interrupting their conversation which I was trying to avoid intruding upon earlier.They inform me that the book should be there on the shelf, the one I had checked earlier. I pretend I didn't check it earlier and thank them for their kind and helpful information. I go back to the shelf with renewed confidence I would find it this time. Angles. Perspectives. Cold sweat. Alas.I return to the employees, sadly noting that my interruption seemingly meant the end to their conversation, and inquired again. The lady says it's a completely white cover (as opposed to the cover I was subconsciously looking for because of the example I had seen on Goodreads) and mentally kick myself when she escorts me to the shelf to point it out. But, to her consternation and to my relief, it isn't there.Did I check downstairs? I cautiously respond in the affirmative. She will check the computer, she's certain there are copies available. And... Computer says Yes! Victory! It's in the store, but probably still in the storage room. She asks me to wait while she goes to fetch it. I'm already running out of time (I had ran out of time four minutes prior, to be exact), but quietly thank her for her enthusiasm in helping me. She returns five minutes later, visibly having gone through physical efforts to help me out. The copy she hands me is damaged, dirty and it has a sticker on it which I know won't be removed without further damage. In short: the kind of book I avoid buying in all circumstances. I smile, I thank her, and buy the book.Now I'm here, late at work, and with a brand-new dirty damaged book beside me.Yes, this book is proving I'm introverted alright. Yay me.Or maybe I'm confusing lack of being assertive with introversion. Whatever the case, this book will teach. It has already begun doing so, in any case.________________________________Part IIBefore I started reading this book, I was hoping it would do two things:1. tell me what I wanted to hear2. tell me what I needed to hear.It gets three stars because it told me what I wanted to hear. This book is the voice of those who are disinclined to use theirs: the introverts. It puts the introverts under a shower of compliments, in the kind of spotlight we're comfortable in: a generous ode that we can absorb from the comfort of our own cozy corner in our own cozy homes, telling us we have a value in this society.This may seem like a ridiculous reason to give stars to a book, but I think it's a good thing that someone gave attention to a group of people who are not used to, and not always comfortable with, getting so much positive feedback. I can imagine it being a helpful outstretched hand to those introverts who have felt misunderstood, out of place or underappreciated. A hand which shows that what they have been struggling with wasn't just inside their mind. It's a fact that society, being largely built on communication and intense interaction, can seem unfit for those who prefer the thinking-mode and absence of interaction most of the time.So on a personal level, this book definitely can have its value. I say "can" and am basing my rating on this potential, though for me personally it wasn't such an eye-opener. I think on some level I've always been very secure about my introversion, despite some practical problems as described in the prelude. In a way I find it funny to think about myself operating like that. I surprise myself in these moments, because before those moments I have this sensible and ideal scenario playing out in my mind and after those moments I'm this rational guy being perfectly capable of seeing how ridiculous I was. But that doesn't prevent me from being ridiculous in the moment.Another reason why this book didn't always work for me on the personal level is because it went too far with the compliments. Consider the following excerpt:At that point I had a little introverted vomit.It's not an all-together bad book, but segments like these really bring it down for me. Segments like the above read like a cheap horoscope-zodiac segment at the end of some teenage magazine. There's only so much of the "what I want to hear" that I can take before I start wondering if there's any truth to it.On a societal level, I don't think this book is as important as it has been made out to be. Introverts indeed consist of a big part of society and thus have helped form it. I'm of the belief that society can't progress by itself. Nothing can be "expected" from society. Society shouldn't cater to any particular group, it's the particular groups that have to find or fight for their place and evolve themselves, in turn engendering progress in society. I think introverts have done a very fine job of this before this book came around, and some anecdotes in this book are proof of that. Introverts have thrived in our world, and will continue to do so. Should education systems be reformed to cater to us? Should work environments do the same? I'm not convinced. Proposals like that make the introvert look like an easily damaged little flower, crushed under the weight of these rigid systems, while I think it's exactly these rigid systems that allow introverts to identify themselves as such.So if the point of this book was patting the introvert on the shoulder to say "You're amazing", it does that well. But to go from there to "You need a society that takes better care of you" is a leap I had difficulties in going along with.There are some practical pointers for introverts, showing how, when or if we should change our behavior to function well in society or, more importantly, in personal relationships with friends, family and partners. The "need to hear"-portion of the book, so to speak. I think most of the solutions offered have been found instinctively by introverts around the world, but I found it nice to hear there's actually a word for "restorative niches". Remembering my long bathroom brakes when I worked in an open office space has become a little less awkward. Getting more familiar with these concepts definitely makes it a lot easier to give this further thought and find ways forward in my sphere of relations.An important problem I have with the book is its premise:Susan Cain makes it sound like a truism. Maybe it is true, yes. But I have to say "maybe" because I don't feel a premise this crucial has been sufficiently backed up.The author tries to do so, referring to experiments and studies where 28% of a group consisting of people possessing an amygdala that is 11% larger than average were 62% more inclined to respond in such and such a way to such and such incentives. The academic back-up felt like a whole lot of cherrypicking. But all those cherries put together did give the impression that they're the only fruit available, giving the idea that the extrovert/introvert divide is indeed inescapable.This leads me to anoher problem: the divide between introverts and extroverts created by the narration itself. It's true, the author sometimes goes out of her way to compliment extroverts as well, mentioning some of their strengths, but that's just the thing: she has to go out of her way to do it. It shows all the more clearly that the natural discourse, through offhand claims and implicit associations, presents the extroverts as ... "the others". And if you picture them as the others, naturally all compliments given to introverts can be read as affronts to the extroverts. I can easily imagine some of the examples and assertions leaving a sour taste of any extrovert's mouth reading this book. (at least when these mouths aren't too busy blabbering about the weather ;-) )Should I hold all this against this book specifically? Truth is I have a problem with most non-fiction books (especially self-help) for this reason: they are written to make a point. A very specific point that they keep getting back to, ad nauseam. The more you hit a nail on the head, the less there's left to see of its point. At least for me.Chesterton says it a lot better:― G.K. ChestertonI felt this was true in this case as well. I showed "Quiet" more patience because the topic is something I really care about and gave a lot of thought to, but in the end it's Chesterton's way of thinking that prevailed in my experience of this book.That said, the three stars are definitely deserved for all the good this book has done for the introverts, in recognizing that other introverts are going through the same thing and in valueing themselves. I just wished it would have described a little less of what we wanted to hear, and would have done much more of what we needed to hear. But maybe we don't "need" to hear all that much, anyway. We're amazing and we know it and we don't clap our hands.