Queen’s speech immediately voted down by MPs

Boris Johnson has suffered another humiliating defeat in the House of Commons after MPs took it upon themselves to instantly vote against the Queen’s speech this morning.

Ten minutes after Her Majesty had finished outlining what her government hoped to achieve, MPs filed out to vote on whether they supported it or not, resulting in no surprise whatsoever.

Liberal Democrat MP Simon Williams told us, “It’s just a force of habit now, to be honest – whenever Boris has brought something to the Commons or got someone else to say something on his behalf, we’ll just go and vote it down.

“What’s this now, the eighth consecutive defeat he’s suffered? Obviously we’re sorry that this will reflect badly on Her Majesty, but I’m sure she supports the sentiment of getting rid of this self-serving bastard as soon as possible.”

Tory MP Christopher James chimed in, “With the exception of Rees-Mogg and the Cabinet, we all voted against it too. Boris is an embarrassment to the Conservative Party and is damaging our image even more than Thatcher, which is saying something.”

The Queen declined to comment, having raced back to the Palace for a stiff drink to wash the foul taste of Boris’s promises from her mouth as soon as the proceedings were over.