Hey everyone, welcome back! Last time we left on a bit of a cliffhanger; let’s see what happens! Hi Lola, how’s life?

Lola: I’m pregnant, my hormones are raging, I’m too afraid to tell my boyfriend about it in case he leaves me, and no-one in the house knows how to cook so I’ve been living off of spoiled party food like this for days now! SO I’M GREAT! What’s that, Mr. Lobster? I should punch Purplehamsterz for asking stupid questions? GREAT IDEA!

…..Uhh, I’ll go speak to Gustav. He’s usually the more sensible one anyway.

Hey, Gustav, what’s up?

Gustav: Ugh, so much is going wrong at the moment. I just can’t gather the courage to ask Lola to marry me, and she’s being really secretive at the moment and I can’t figure out why.

That sucks, but still, at least you don’t seem to be going crazy like she is.

Gustav: Me? Go crazy? You know better than that, I’m probably more sane than you.

Yeah, that’s tr–

Gustav: Oh god, an invisible dancing lobster! Stop snapping those claws in my face! You can’t have my eyebrows, I already told you that Sunday!

Gustav: Between you and me, though, lobster, that really is a dazzling tuxedo you’re wearing there. You look like a young Fred Astaire.

…They need to stop eating that spoiled seafood, I think it’s messing with their heads.

What about you, Charlie? You usually have some good news at least! How are you?

Charlie: Yeah, I’m pretty good. Apart from the fleas, of course.

Oh for God’s sake, what the hell is wrong with this household? Everything’s going wrong! Right, I’m going to try and sort all these secrets and problems out once and for all.

Please get your hallucinating butt over to the bedroom, Lola’s got something to tell you.

Daniel: Uh oh, Daniel doesn’t like the sound of that.

….Daniel who?

Gustav: That’s what I called the invisible lobster. We got over our differences and now we’re dancing partners.

JUST GO AND PLEASE STOP EATING SPOILED FOOD.

Lola: Okay, so I honestly really didn’t want to tell you this, but… well, I suppose I can’t really just not tell you. You’d probably think that I’ve just been stacking on the weight, and that’s so not cool with me. So, I’ll tell you with a joke to lighten the mood: what’s the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb? You can’t unscrew a pregnant woman!

Gustav: ….. Are you saying what I think you’re saying?

Lola: ….I’m afraid so.

Gustav: You’re gonna become an electrician? Cool! I never learnt how to do the light bulbs so this will be a big help!

Lola: … No. Gus, I’m pregnant. And I know that it was never something we ever talked about and I know that I never seemed to want to settle down, but I think we could make this work, and —

Gustav: Lola, seriously, you were worried to tell me this? This is the best news I’ve ever gotten! I can’t believe it, I’m so excited!

Lola: Really?

Gustav: Really really. I tell you what – tomorrow is Love day, right? Why don’t we go for a little picnic or something for lunch, and take the dog. We can just chill out, play with Charlie, and talk about the baby. I know the perfect picnic spot.

I like to imagine that Lola filled this with her really awful cooking and weird cravings, and that Gustav replaced it all with store-bought stuff when she wasn’t looking, so he wouldn’t have to endure having spaghetti ice cream for lunch. Yeah. She gets cravings for odd things.

Gustav: Is this a good spot for a picnic then?

Lola: … you could say that.

This is why I love the Sims franchise – even after a good eight or nine years of playing it, I’m still blown away by the detail and effort that they put into the designs of the towns and worlds. Those little pink and blue dots in the top left-hand corner are Lola and Gustav, if you’d like to know for a size comparison.

Gustav: It’s kind of beautiful, isn’t it?

Lola: … It just kind of makes me want to go for a pee. Or go skinny dipping.

… weird game glitch is weird.

Charlie: Ew. He’s going to get a looooot of hair in his mouth.

Cue adorable-couple-pregnancy-family-picture-spam!

Gustav: Today has been great, but to be honest, I did invite you here with a question in mind.

Lola: … I didn’t kill him, I swear it was an accident, I was dealt some bad pills, and —

Gustav: Uhh, that’s not what I’m asking you about.

Lola: Oh. Ok then. Shoot.

Gustav: So this is something I’ve been wanting to do for a while…

Gustav: …I just needed to build up my courage.

Lola: Seriously, Gus, I just washed those jeans. Can you not be a douche and get grass stains all over them?

Gustav: Would grass stains be worth it for….. THIS?

Lola: OMFGASDFGHJKLASFGKLASDRTGHJKLASDFGHJKLASDFGHJK no not really, they’re pretty hard to get out.

Aw. Romantic.

Lola: Ohhhh, it’s so beautiful! Seriously though, get up, those jeans are new.

Engaged by a waterfall and already fighting about laundry. I can’t work out if these two are ridiculously sweet or completely unromantic.

Lola: Gus, I’m really happy that you’ve asked me to marry you and the answers yes, of course, but I want to wait until the baby is born. I don’t want people to think that I’m marrying you because I’m pregnant, like my mom did. I want them to know it’s because I love you.

Gustav: I love you too. You know, that’s the first time you’ve said that.

Lola: But not the first time I’ve thought it.

Charlie: What’s going on, guys?

Lola: I never thought I’d say this, Gus, but I can’t wait to marry you.

Charlie: *gasp*

Charlie: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Charlie: WHHHYYYYYYYYYYYYY?!

Calm down, buddy. She really wasn’t your type. Or your species, for that matter.

Charlie: It should’ve been me, God dammit!

I’ve never seen a sim dog look this angry! Look at those eyes. That’s hate right there.

Later on, it seems that Lola is having some hormone problems due to the pregnancy – not that she’s not crazy enough already, of course.

Lola: I’m right here; I did hear that! ….I have a craving. BRING ME PB&J RIGHT NOW! ….Don’t bother. It’s passed.

Poor Lola. You really are suffering with this, aren’t you?

Lola: Totally! I’m just like, “Hey fetus, if you could just, like, get out of my vagina soon, that’d be great.’

… ew.

Gustav: I know it’s difficult, Lo, but you’ll get through it. I’ve got something special for you in the skilling room to cheer you up.

Lola: Oh god, it’s not another nude painting of Rainflower Ivy is it? I swear to god, I keep telling him to stop sending me those.

Gustav: …No, it’s — hang on, what?

Lola: I don’t see anything.

Gustav: Exactly.

Lola: Yeah, see, here’s the thing. When someone promises me a present and doesn’t deliver, I get pissed. I remember once before I moved here I had a boyfriend who promised me jewellery for my birthday. I was super excited. Then he got me chocolates instead.

Lola: … He hasn’t been seen in a long time.

Gustav: The reason there’s nothing here is because I’ve cleared everything out into other rooms, to get this one ready to turn into a nursery. I just want it all to be perfect and non-stressful for you.

Lola: Well, when you put it that way, maybe I won’t hit you over the head with a hammer.

Gustav: Pardon?

Lola: Nothing, my sweet.

Gustav: There’s one problem though – I couldn’t find anywhere to stick your drafting table because it was too big. Would you be okay working in here?

Lola: To be honest, Gus, I’ve been thinking about quitting my designing job. I mostly started doing it to make friends but I’ve got like ten now and I know at least twenty people in total; I’m sure I could complete my lifetime wish on my own. I get more money from painting now anyway, and besides, once this little crap machine sees its way out of me I’m not going to want to be leaving them all the time.

Aw, that’s sweet.

Lola: I just hope the people of Moonlight Falls can cope without my sassiness in their salon. I truly do.

So, that was it, and the drafting table had to go. Sorry buddy!

Sir Draft Tablington: Ah, mustn’t fret my old chap! Pip pip, cheerio and all that!

Gustav: Ugh, I’m just so excited!

Lola: Then why are you pushing me over?!

Lola: (muffled) …oh.

I must say, I got all the expansions packs I didn’t have for Christmas so I have them all now, and this has got to be my new favourite interaction.

I ship Lolav so hard. Even harder than Johnlock.

Lola: I know I’ve not said it a whole lot, but I do love you. And that won’t ever change, no matter what.

FIVE MINUTES LATER

Lola: GUSTAV GUSTO YOU LITTLE BASTARD I WILL KILL YOU NEVER COME NEAR ME AGAIN OR I WILL RIP YOUR GUTS OUT AND USE THEM AS A SKIPPING ROPE

In labour?

Lola: You could say that.

Charlie: Yeah, so, um, this probably isn’t an amazing time, but I have fleas. So, yeah, if you could sort that out for me soon, I’d appreciate that. No? Ok. That’s cool.

Lola: Ooooh, glitter is a good sign! Glitter always brings something good!

Lola: Yep, even with all the blood loss and lack of any pain relief or healthcare, glitter can make me feel fabulous. Is there anything it can’t do?

Lola: Oh my god, she came out fully swaddled! Forget about the glitter, my vagina is the real miracle here! I must have blankets in there and everything!

Lola: Wow, I’m so multi-talented! Party host, designer, painter, dancing legend, hottie, baby maker, and now a blanket manufacturer… is there anything I can’t do?

I love this picture, she looks so proud.

Reminds me of this otter actually.

Lola: Hey there daughter. All you sim babies may look like a doll’s unholy offspring with a pink caterpillar, but I still think you’re pretty cool. Now you just need a good, cute name.

You may remember my naming scheme for this legacy – each generation was to be named after characters of a certain musical. Well, Generation 1 is going to be my absolute favourite – The Book of Mormon!I’ve been a fan for years and seen it twice since it opened in London under a year ago, but I’m booked to see it for a third time in March. If you haven’t heard any of the songs, I seriously recommend having a listen: it’s honestly hilarious (unless you’re easily offended, but I’ve never heard of anyone who’s not liked it or found it genuinely insulting, even Mormons)!

So, this little girl is to be called Nabalungi Zodie (pronounced Nab-ah-loon-gee) after the female lead; a young Ugandan village girl. She’s a clumsy genius who loves the colour pink, and —

Lola: Hang on… What did you call my baby?!

That looks like it’s my queue to leave – until next time, and keep on simming!

Lola: You’re so dead.