We’re living in a tense political moment. Millions of young people throughout the United States and the world have already been radicalized by fascist groups. Young men in particular are susceptible to the kind of recruiting techniques popular with these ideologies. There are a lot of things to consider in this new and frightening environment, and dating is probably pretty low on most progressives’ list of priorities. But frankly, relationships are hard enough without worrying about your crush’s dangerously authoritarian tendencies. That’s where we come in. Here’s our handy guide on how to proceed if you suspect that hot guy in your chemistry class may be less open-minded than he seems.

Find out what his background is like

There’s no way for you to know what kind of environment your beau was raised in. Where did he grow up? Was he taken away from his parents at a young age? Does he even have two parents? What’s the age difference like between you guys? These are all important factors to consider.

What’s he like when you’re alone?

Picture it: You’re rolling around in a grassy field, all alone, having a friendly chat and feeling great about life. And then your boyfriend casually endorses the idea of an all-powerful ruler dispensing political judgments as he sees fit. Mood killer, huh? This is a good time to check in on your boyfriend’s one-on-one conversation skills. Does he leer at you and call you “milady”? Does he constantly complain about authority figures in his life? Raise a fuss when you make a decision without his input? If so, you may have a problem on your hands.

Disturbing dreams are a bad sign

Studies have shown that violent or otherwise traumatic dreams are a big warning sign when it comes to fascist tendencies. Left undiscussed, these night terrors can lead to endless frustration and possibly self-medication. You don’t want that old guy you work with selling your boyfriend drugs or treating him with any other crackpot nonsense. Get your man to therapy stat.

Heroes don’t always turn out heroic

Maybe you met your boyfriend when he broke up a fight nearby, or stopped a mugging, or helped you escape an otherwise difficult situation. Hell, maybe he thwarted a bounty hunter’s attempt on your life! The point is, none of these are a license to trust implicitly. A lot of seemingly good people have darkness lurking beneath the surface. Keep an eye out for warning signs of dark thoughts or actions.

Secret weddings are asking for trouble

Let’s say you’ve ignored all the warning signs and you’re just throwing caution to the winds. Everybody has their little weird personality traits, right? He’s been good to you and you love him. You’ll make it work. But then he tells you that no one can know about your wedding. Like, not even your parents. Only his weird tiny mechanic friend and your butler are allowed to be there. This is bad news. Your fiance may already be a member of some kind of cult. Confront him on the matter and tell him you won’t stand for it.

Does he have violent outbursts?

It’s a classic situation: You’re visiting his family, just getting to know everyone and their quirks. You think everything’s going great. Your boyfriend goes to pick his mom up from work, returns without her, and you can tell something’s wrong. You pull him aside and ask him if everything’s okay, and he drops this bombshell: He just murdered an entire village of native people after finding his mother dying in captivity there. Everybody makes mistakes, right? Wrong. Get the hell out of there.

Watch for signs of radicalization

Is that creepy old guy from work hanging around the house wearing a hood? Is your husband developing some kind of eye infection that makes him look hella sinister? Is he asking you to call him something weird and German-sounding? Are you hearing scary stories about him from work? Stories like “He murdered every child in the building and now I’m on the run, please tell me where he is so I can stop him before he kills again”? Girl, your man is probably a fascist. Run away.

Did he choke you to death with his mind while you were pregnant with twins?

This is the big one. If your husband is doing this, he’s definitely a fascist. I’m sorry, but you brought this on yourself. Literally all of the warning signs were in place.