“Happiness is found when you stop comparing yourself to other people.”

There isn’t a worse killer of happiness than comparison. It kills joy, takes away pleasure from life, makes one’s achievements look smaller and drains positivity from one’s surroundings.

The funny thing about comparison is that the person you are comparing yourself to might be comparing him/herself with you and be dwelling in a constant state of worry and anxiousness.

Needless to say, comparison creates a vicious cycle of unhappy emotions.

It happens because we tend to compare our weaknesses with strengths of others. Two people can easily compare their selves with each other and both of them can feel hopeless or under achieved.

Now imagine…

Had Steve Jobs compared himself with Bill Gates over wealth and company’s success, he would have been super depressed because Gates was 10 times richer and fairly accomplished. Had Jobs fallen a prey to the trap of comparison- he would not have risen to create history with Apple Inc.

5 Tips to Stop Comparing!

All of us can be happy if only we quit comparing and start living. Here are our 5 rules on how to stop comparing:

Count Your Blessings

Our mind has been conditioned to compare over years; it starts from adolescence when parents without realizing end up using statements like

‘Can’t you be as well behaved as so and so…?’

OR

‘When he/she can do it, why can’t you?’

Similarly, schools, colleges and universities drill the very concept of comparison in the name of ‘promoting’ competitiveness as a way of making an individual ambitious and successful.

It seems everything is all about positions and who gets paid better.

How you rank against the other people?

It becomes the reason of parents pride and happiness but has disastrous, long-term implications on the child.

No one can be good at EVERYTHING.

Start by counting your blessings and look at people who are not as fortunate as you. Rather than viewing the glass as half empty, look at it as half full.

Develop a daily habit of counting and writing things you are grateful for and see how this conditions your mindset to recognize little things that make a difference.

Be Mindful Of The Comparison Habit

As we mature, comparison becomes a habit and gets embedded in our sub-conscious.

Before we know it, our daily conversations and statements are hijacked by the comparison rut.

Most of the times we don’t realize that we are doing it and it happens so ‘naturally’ that we continue without having a slightest idea.

We compare when we go out with friends, when we eat at a restaurant, what clothes we wear etc.

To put an end to it, start by identifying common things and habits that compel you to compare.

Knowing what triggers comparison can instead be repositioned as a factor which makes you realize that you need to count your blessings instead of grieving over something you feel you lack.

Being vigilant towards identifying what causes you to compare is the first step towards refocusing your thoughts and mental space towards instilling contentment with what you have.

Nobody is Perfect

Understanding that nobody is perfect can help us in loving ourselves more.

It helps us at looking at the bright side of the picture and makes us more human that we all have weaknesses and we all are imperfect.

The school teaches us to be hard on ourselves and by the time we graduate we forget how to be happy.

We need to love ourselves to be happy and get comfortable with idea that no one is perfect at everything.

Compete and Compete With Yourself

You will come across many people in life who have accomplished a lot and yet are not happy.

It may seem to you from a third person’s perspective that they have a million things to be grateful for and they should be super happy but…they are not.

The dilemma with such people is that their happiness is tied to their judgment of how are other people doing in life.

Putting your happiness at the disposal of others and tying it to their progress or digress is setting yourself up for failure.

Make yourself your biggest competitor, compare yourself with your OWN progress and pace.

Be a better version of yourself and notice how happiness will take over your life.

Bonus Tip

Maintain a journal and write everything you are grateful for in it.

Focus on your achievements, feel blessed by what you have in life and align your thoughts to quit comparing and start living.

Life is too short to get stuck in a web of comparison, instead nurture and feel happiness.







