Eventually, every known property will get a movie. Boardgames, songs, even reality TV shows. The proof (as if any more is required) can be found in the fact that we’re now getting a Cops movie.

According to Deadline, Zombieland director Ruben Fleischer is attached to direct this thing, which will be an “edgy narrative feature with a buddy comedy bent on the border of a Lethal Weapon.” If you hear a worse sentence today, let me know.

So this won’t be any kind of big screen reality TV thing. It’s a wholly separate fictional buddy cop narrative. In other words, this is Cops in name only. What a shame for a television show with such history and dignity.

Obviously, they are going to use the hell out of that theme song, though it’s doubtful Will Smith or Martin Lawrence will cameo.