TALKING about God is tricky. In my family, there are two basic truths about God: the first being that there is only one, the second being that you probably shouldn’t bring Him up during dates or on the dinner table.

Talking about religion requires a certain kind of caution; one that’s just as concerned with not offending someone’s sensibilities, as it is about preserving your own. This is so because nobody—atheist or believer—wants to be disappointed. So when we talk about God, we don’t.

This silence is especially tangible in the Diliman, Quezon City, campus of the University of the Philippines (UP)—and not without reason.

Being a state university, it goes without saying that UP Diliman can’t and shouldn’t impose any one religion on its community. The university, which prides itself on the freedom of choice, is always said to be a microcosm of the Philippines at large. And while part of that definitely entails taking everybody into account, it begets an interesting series of questions: Where are all the Catholics and why aren’t they joining Catholic student organizations?

It’s a common knowledge that the Catholic population of the Philippines floats at around 75 percent. In 2015 the Philippine Statistics Authority reported that Roman Catholics composed 80.58 percent, totaling 74 million. In 2017 the UP student population was reported to be composed of 21,795 undergraduate and graduate students.

Across four Catholic organizations—UP Student Catholic Action (UPSCA), UP In-Christ Thrust for University Students (Ictus), Christ’s Youth in Action-UP Diliman chapter (CYA) and Youth for Christ-UP (YFC-UP), only 101 members are currently recognized by the Office of Student Activities (OSA). Add in the 38 volunteers in UPD’s Campus Ministry and Catholic organizations total 139 members, or 0.006 percent of UP’s student population and a far cry from the PSA’s 80.58 percent.

So where did everyone go?

Losing edge

THE UPSCA has been around since 1936, making it the first Catholic organization in the university. Since then, the UPSCA has prided itself in developing what it calls a “truly Filipino Christian community.”

The UPSCA takes a more grassroots approach to Catholicism. It’s a foundation that dates way back through the group’s history. During martial law, for example, the UPSCA managed a printing press that disseminated newsletters critical of the Marcos administration.

This social responsibility approach extends up until today. UPSCA’s activities include immersion in different communities where participants attempt to recognize and identify the problems these communities face. Through this, the UPSCA then aims to cultivate a call to action among its members, while remaining rooted in the Christian faith.

Having been around this long, the UPSCA has seen better days when it comes to its membership.

Even UPSCA President Lyka Ordoñez has found the slow decline in membership disarming.

“According to our alumni, like the ones from the 1970s, UPSCA had around 500 [members] or more,” Ordoñez said after pushing up her rectangle eyeglass. “Then in the 1990s, it was around 300, with only half of them being active. And in the 2000s, it slowly began decreasing.”

UPSCA currently has 28 registered members, according to the OSA, but Ordoñez says the number is closer to 40. Either way, Ordoñez has noticed the decline in UPSCA’s membership.

Hard to brand

ORDOÑEZ admitted the UPSCA experiences difficulty to recruit members.

“It’s hard to force people, mostly because it’s really hard to brand yourself as a Catholic organization,” she said, fiddling with her earring studs. “The notion that people have of Catholic organizations is that it’s all dasal-dasal [prayers] and that they don’t need that in college.”

Despite this, however, Ordoñez remains confident that UPSCA isn’t going away anytime soon.

“It’ll still be alive, even if there’s only a few left, so long as those few are dedicated. And I think there are still dedicated members, so we really just need to put more effort.”

“Joining UPSCA made me realize there’s more to it than just the word of God being taught in the Bible,” Ordoñez said. “The morals of society have basis in the Catholic faith; stuff that even if you’re not Catholic, you do anyway. But there’s more clarity once you know those things about the Catholic faith.”

Ordoñez also strongly believes that there’s more to Catholicism than attending Mass or avoiding sin. She notes that joining UPSCA gave her meaning as far as living out the word of God goes. “Look at Christ. He actively went out to the people that needed help, and he helped them.”

Curious case

ONE of the more curious cases when it comes to Catholic organizations is the story of the YFC-UP.

YFC, which began as an offshoot of Couples for Christ, is a nationwide organization that consists of chapters in various schools and communities. It’s an organization of the charismatic movement, meaning that the traditionally Pentecostal methods of praise and worship (such as more singing and dancing) are brought into the Catholic context.

However, despite being a charismatic group with its branding as a more intimate alternative to praise and worship, YFC-UP has been through some very tough times in the recent years. This included a time when the group’s president reportedly admitted to being an atheist, according to a current member.

The member, who wanted to be identified only as “Carlo Santos,” had been a member of YFC-UP since his freshman year. In that time, Santos experienced the aforementioned leadership crisis and how it crippled the organization.

“[The president] was formally entered into YFC-UP through a youth camp in the campus, and when it comes to campus-based things, especially here in UP, it’s not as solid with respect to the ideals of the YFC,” Santos said.

Leadership crisis

ACCORDING to Santos, about two to three years after becoming president, he became executive president “without us knowing that [the president’s] faith was wavering.”

“It was the small acts. We had hints,” Santos said. “But I guess one factor was that we in the executive team got so busy that, instead of being a support group for each other, what happened was we became task-based—without the pastoral side of our organization.”

According to Santos, a former YFC leader told the other members of the executive team that the president was only performing for the sake of executing duties as an official.

“[The president] tried to distance himself, but in a way where the organization wouldn’t be crippled. Unfortunately, it did cripple the organization,” Santos said. “The thing is, if you try to distance yourself but you don’t want to be too far from the group, you can’t give your all—especially as a core member of the organization.”

He also blamed the lack of communication, as well as organizational dynamics.

“Communication-wise, we couldn’t communicate much. And the organization is very relational-based,” Santos explained. “So when [the president] wouldn’t talk to us, or when we would try to talk to him and he wouldn’t respond, what else was left for us to do?”

Leftist views

SANTOS demurs YFC-UP may have also frowned upon its president’s alleged leftist views. On the other hand, he admits that maybe YFC-UP lacked—and still lacks—activities based in social responsibility and the grassroots.

“I guess he just didn’t see the essence of what YFC does in connection with his ideals as a ‘Red,’” Santos said. “So, it was as if he thought that ‘if this [YFC] is what I associate with the Lord, and if this [YFC] isn’t that rooted in society, then he probably saw Catholicism as very distant from society.”

But while Santos believes that perhaps, the president’s departure was in part due to his association with the so-called Leftists, Santos doesn’t think it’s mutually exclusive.

“We have a good pope today. You see his efforts to be inclusive,” Santos said. “And that inclusivity accepts those ideas of the Reds to be more social and to be more into the grassroots.”

Very personal

STILL, Santos said he understood the process the president and the organization went through.

“Catholic faith, for me, is very personal. If you don’t see the essence of being Catholic, that doesn’t necessarily mean it’s a failure of Catholicism itself but, perhaps, a failure of circumstance to connect with the Lord,” Santos said.

He added he doesn’t blame the president “for not having that personal connection.”

“People think Catholicism is very rule-based and very strict. There’s a lot that happens in Catholicism that not everyone sees,” Santos said. “YFC-UP is an alternative. YFC-UP allowed me to have a more personal relationship with [God]. Everyone just sees the Mass as a repetitive ritual that people just do every week, and they can’t connect.”

YFC-UP, according to Santos, has slowly been getting back on its feet, with many of its current members having come from previous YFC backgrounds.

Empty chairs

WHEN we talk about the declining membership in Catholic organizations, one question springs into mind—are Catholic organizations themselves declining?

One defunct group is called the UP Campus Feast, a Catholic organization that aimed to spread the so-called Feast experience of Bo Sanchez’s Light of Jesus community to the UP Diliman campus. Josh Gapay was a member from the group’s initial inception in 2010 (though he wasn’t officially enrolled in UP yet) until the organization folded in 2015. According to Gapay, there were stages to the decline of the UP Campus Feast.

“The first stage was having events—there would be masses, worship and talks. After that, [attendance] became smaller, although weekly, with only worship and talks,” he said. “Then a change of leadership happened and all that was left was group sharing up until our population dwindled. And [the feast] slowly went away.” Gapay added that the group wasn’t able to secure recognition with the OSA.

“To add to that, the two missionaries we had, had left.”

Gapay claims a big part of the UP Campus Feast’s demise came with the change of the group’s overall leadership.

“When the leadership changed, [the leaders] told us to just do group sharing instead,” he said. “They felt that students could do it alone and that we didn’t need them around.”

According to Gapay, over time, it became more difficult to function without real spiritual guidance. This eventually led to being more difficult to get people to attend what little events we had left, he added.

Until it rests

TALKING about God is tricky. But between the three of them—Ordoñez, Santos and Gapay—they believe there’s still a place for Catholic organizations.

“It’s a big help to students,” Ordoñez said. “In a secular university, you assume everyone’s an atheist or agnostic. And when you join a Catholic organization, it helps you gain some sort of direction in life, or at the very least, someone’s there to guide you.”

Gapay agrees with this sentiment.

“Notice the youth. In this age, a lot of people have existential crises. They question why they’re in the world and so many people get depressed. What is life for?” he said. “So many people ask big questions like that and oftentimes people just run it through indulging in worldly pleasures—only to find out that it’s not enough.”

Gapay added that such situation emphasizes the important role of the Catholic Church.

“That’s why the role of the Church is so important—to lead people, now in this time when people have crises like those.”

Hope stirs

THIS belief is the reason, in spite of the downward trend facing Catholic organizations inside and outside the UP Diliman campus, the three remain hopeful that people can pick up a thing or two from the Catholic faith.

“I always remain hopeful,” Santos said. “Hoping for a better future is always there for any man of faith.”

However, when it comes to the participation of UP students in Catholic groups, Gapay recognizes that it was, and still is, an ongoing challenge.

“It’s difficult. In the first place, being a Christian isn’t easy. It has demands,” he said. “When you believe, you have to change your lifestyle completely. And you can’t really blame other people, because a big part of your life will change when you accept faith.”

According to him, what members of Catholic organizations like YFC-UP can do “is impart [the Catholic faith] in our lives: what it means to be Christian so that they feel it, too, through our actions.”

“That’s honestly the only way to evangelize.”

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Andrew Mencias is a junior student of journalism at the College of Mass Communications of the University of the Philippines. This edited version of Mencias’s story, originally titled “Ain’t nobody praying for me,” was a requirement for the News reporting class. The BusinessMirror secured Mencias’s approval for publication of his story.