I have several good things to tell you!

What’s May 15th got to do with anything? Oh, I remember now. BattleBlock Theater is releasing on Steam for Windows & Linux! Yes that’s what I wanted to say. And that’s all. Nothing else to say.

WAIT, NO. I forgot some other stuff. We’ve done some great things during the development of the Steam version that should make everything a little bit better and nothing a little bit worse (as far as I know!!!!!). Cats are fatter, weapons can be immediately switched, Steam Trading, Steam Trading Cards, alterations of the “better” variety exist for sure. The base price for such splendor shall be $14.99.

“$14.99?”, you say? “The Splendor overtakes my being! I am so happy I don’t even know what else I could be saying and I should be getting it right now instead of talking!” “Yes” I reply, “But you cannot get it now because it isn’t May 15th yet.“*

If you’re not familiar with this whole thing, you can check out a video of our announcement trailer here:







Definitely don’t have anything else to announce. Nothing of the surprise variety or anything like that. Oh wait, yes, there is something;

If you were a Steam Beta Tester for us I’d like to let you know that your copy of the game will be FREE. That’s right – Beta Testers shall get their copy for FREE! This is our way of saying thank you for helping us identify any threats.

“Should I remember to delete the Beta before diving in to avoid any weirdness?” You ask. “Why yes, how thoughtful of you!”* I reply.

* These dialogues are here for example purposes and any exact conversations that have occurred like this are merely coincidental.

I LOVE YOUUUUU~

– Dan Paladin



TL;DR Version

