Semen/Sperm Facial Mask

I am 26yrs old and a single mother of two, my eldest daughter Millisent – spelt purposely as I call her Millie Sent From Heaven – is six and my son Gabriele is two. Sleepless nights, teething, central-heating, messy play and cold morning walks to school have no doubt taken a toll on my skin, let alone that wonderful foe of ours, age. I have had erythematotelangiectatic rosacea (ETR) since I was little which causes facial redness and flushing, with visible blood vessels and leaves my face sensitive, dry, stinging and hot; my face often becomes dehydrated and worn looking which cracks my foundation if I don’t moisturise or impose some kind of quenching facial mask each week. Women are most prone to this skin condition, as well as those with a fair complexion and blue eyes, and a family history of rosacea, all of which applies to me. There are four types of rosacea affecting men and women which can either present itself from birth, like me, or develop around middle age. There is no cure for rosacea but there are creams available and lasering can help to lessen the effects, as well as avoiding sunlight, alcohol and spicy foods, which are unfortunately three of my favourite things in life.

Healthline states: “People who have rosacea suffer considerable emotional distress because of the appearance of their skin. A study by the National Rosacea Society revealed that 41 percent of people with rosacea avoided public contact and canceled social engagements (AAD). In addition, the same survey found that close to 70 percent of people with rosacea said the condition lowered their confidence and self-esteem. According to the National Rosacea Society, rosacea is a chronic skin disease that affects more than 16 million Americans (NRS).” Sadly I was bullied my whole childhood until I left school, simply because of how I looked; try growing up being tall, lanky and red faced with uneven sized breasts.

I also have the onset of fine lines and wrinkles, as do most my age, with creases appearing on my forehead, laughter lines and crowsfeet, but they are not to the extent of botox just yet, if ever I would. After having PIP breast implants at the age of eighteen at a reputable clinic in Harley Street, London, which has since thankfully closed down whilst shirking all legal responsibility and left me, and thousands of women alike, with illegal silicone leaking into my body and years of pain, followed by an allergic reaction to an unknown allergen which caused my head to swell uncontrollably, it is safe to say that I much prefer the natural and holistic approach to beauty over that of chemicals and dangerous poisons.

Speaking with my beauty therapist I enquired into the benefits of having a facial peel, which is performed with a mild form of acid that removes the top layers of dead skin from the face in order to reveal a beautiful baby fresh complexion, but my excitement was soon quashed when my rosacea and sensitive skin made me an unsuitable candidate. She suggested I try a more natural approach and look at home remedies and inexpensive natural treatments that I could maintain, which is when the topic of semen facials came up, so to speak. When I returned home I began researching the use of semen as a facial ingredient and found American actress Heather Locklear of 90210 was a big fan and many experts had confirmed its benefits.

I can imagine that to some, the thought of using a semen facial mask may turn stomachs, but for years no secret has been made about the beauty benefits of using live and natural ingredients such as placental extracts, algae, mud, minerals, live yogurt, vegetables, oils and even blood. And we’ve all heard of wacky home remedies from grandmothers or great aunts who swear by applying strange and unsavoury ointments and potions in all sorts of places, as many people did years ago before todays modern skincare brands became so readily available. In the interest of beauty I see semen as being a fresh, active and stimulating ingredient, which gives my skin the glow and freshness that I require for a healthy skincare regime for my sensitive condition. Obviously consistency and quality will differ between each batch and source, and you may be hard pushed to ever find a supermarket which stocks the mask; it is therefore worth investing in a reliable male with a healthy diet and stamina to ensure a plentiful supply, perhaps a boyfriend, husband or in my case a health conscious friend. Whoever you choose to provide a donation it is important that you use the same caution you would around all bodily fluids, always ensure that they have had a sexual health check and are eating clean and nutritious food a few days before instead of smoking, drinking and bingeing on junk or the quality will suffer. I would never condone using anonymous semen and in no way encourage this to become a sexual act, I am simply looking at this from the angle of beauty. You have to strip away the shock-horror of the ingredients and any preconception of how it may feel, smell or look and base it solely on what it does.

As the beauty consumer, it is our own personal preference to ensure that products we use are acquired from an organic and sustainable source, manufactured in a safe and non-hazardous way and not tested on animals if this concerns you as it does me. Unfortunately for my semen facials a human organic cock is badly beaten on a regular basis in order to produce a mask, which some people may find disturbing; however I am reliably informed that the level of distress was kept to a minimum at all times, as obviously battery cocks cannot provide the produce required or I would have been well stocked for life. I would also like to stress that I am not present during the donation process, as I simply receive it in a plastic container fresh from a sensible friend who delivers it to me after in his own time.

Depending on quantity and texture which varies from day to day and frequency used, I mix an egg white with a few drops of lavender oil to give the mask its consistency and durability to cover my face, it also helps it to smell nice and can be stored in the fridge until needed. After washing my hands and face I take a towel and place it around my shoulders before titling my head back and applying the semen mask to my chin, cheeks and forehead with my fingers. My chosen method is to apply the semen in a circular massaging motion to ensure that it is evenly spread across my face and just like any mask you must take care to avoid the eyes, nose and mouth. Some ladies may choose to have it applied directly to their face on their behalf by their partner, however being a spinster, and in the interest of research, I require strategic placement in controlled areas to achieve optimum results. I then close my eyes and put my feet up with my semen face mask in place to avoid any movement or runs, waiting fifteen minutes or so before washing it off with warm water.

Afterwards my skin is fresher, brighter and looks and feels so much better. My makeup sits nicer on my skin without cracking or caking, and my skin tone is improved and less reddened as it cools and soothes my face. With all skincare, if you don’t maintain it then the results won’t last, so I typically have a facial once or twice a week depending on how my skin feels and when I receive a donation. We all need to look after our skin in our twenties and thirties in order to remain youthful and supple in our forties and fifties and beyond. Gone are the days of chain-smoking sun bed worshipping as anti-ageing is gradually focusing its attention upon prevention rather than cure. I would definitely not like to look like a chewy old leather handbag in twenty years time, so if science discovers hedgehog saliva, tulip milk, or babies tears leave you with healthier skin then I’m all for it. You can pay hundreds of pounds for face creams packed with chemicals and wacky ingredients which are suited to the masses instead of individual skin conditions, or you can turn to nature and source and construct your own. So long as it provides the results you desire and doesn’t harm anyone then who is to say what is socially acceptable or not?

I think this topic is very much down to the individual to either understand it for what it is, a beauty procedure, or to take offence and have a negative opinion of it. But that’s perfectly fine, we’re all entitled to our own opinion. Millions of men, women and teenagers all over the world on a daily basis apply heavily manufactured cosmetics to their skin, have invasive beauty procedures, cosmetic surgery and body alterations in order to improve their appearance and achieve the results that they desire; knowingly packing their bodies full of chemicals, toxins and poison. As we never physically see the ingredients that go into our luxuriously glossy face creams in expensive glass containers and purposely designed packaging, we never truly consider its contents and instead view it solely on its benefits; does it work for me or not? If every chemical name and number, animal produce, extract and element were to be photographed and displayed on the packaging we would never use cosmetics again. Being almost vegan I find the texture of raw egg whites on my face makes me gag more than the thought of semen; and as semen helps to create babies then I’m happy to use it to make my skin baby soft.

I would love to hear your thoughts on the semen facial, are you for or against homemade remedies? Have you tried the semen facial? Are you considering it after reading this? All feedback, good or bad is welcome.

UPDATE: Closer Magazine

My views on the semen facial have been printed in Closer Magazine, Issue 15 April 2014. How exciting!

I have asked that all fees from the magazine are donated to my JustGiving page to help raise funds for Cancer Research UK whom I have chosen as my charity to support this year.

UPDATE: 15/04/14 My Beauty Review Goes Worldwide

So my blog about a natural beauty treatment has now gone worldwide in just a matter of hours and it seems the controversial headline published in a UK magazine “I cover my face in sperm to stay young!” has caused quite a stir. It is incredibly interesting to see the uncensored thoughts about you through the eyes of the public based solely on a magazine article. I know that it is their job to deliver punchy, shocking and unusual content to interest and entertain their readers, which makes for some pretty hilarious scrolling through page upon page of comments and first impressions from people all over the world. What an eye opener!

It’s not surprising that people focus on the key points of the story being ‘young’ ‘single’ ‘mum’ using her ‘friend’s ‘sperm’ to defy ageing. And I’d imagine to the majority I may come across as a complete self-centred lunatic who is breaking the heart of my poor friend via unrequited love, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. Does being twenty-six years old mean that I don’t have dry and sensitive skin because of my lifelong rosacea? Or as I’m a single parent surely I must be irresponsible, never mind the fact that I actually stuck around to raise my two children single-handedly whilst working. Oh look, I also have breasts, which yes are fake because sadly mine didn’t develop properly as a teen which some call a deformity, and I call a private cosmetic procedure which I paid for to save the costs to the NHS who treat thousands of women each year with implants, reductions and corrections. Ah, and yes I’m single, because obviously I must be a complete and utter bunny boiler who stalks men and forces everyone to leave me; so let’s pretend I wasn’t just in a 6yr relationship with a ring on my finger and my needy cravings for daily semen were just too intense to stick around for. And the fact that I ask my friend, who is a man, to provide me with the only ingredient that I cannot source myself is unfair to him? Well, you’ve all heard of the saying save a tree eat a beaver? I’m sure billions of men across the world waste a heck of a lot of potential children multiple times a day, so what is the harm in my using some from a reputable and safe source every now and then? Is it male exploitation? Or am I making the peril of semen useful so that it’s short life needn’t be in vain? And I’m slim, so clearly I’m self obsessed and must starve myself in my quest for perfection as I’m not healthy or active at all, again please totally disregard my fitness blogging and reviews too. Oh and look, when I smile bags form under my eyes, this must mean that I’m definitely in my late thirties, a whole decade above my age, because I’m an irresponsible self obsessed porn star mother? Or perhaps not. I just have chubby cheeks which bunch up like a toddler when I smile and otherwise disappear when I have my regular blank face in position.

The fact that I get I.D’d when buying alcohol or sharp objects for which the age threshold is 25yrs really annoys me, as I drive, have two children and left home more years ago than I care to remember. People are always so wrong about my age, if I wear jeans they think I’m a teenager, and if I wear something to show my figure they think I’m a retired porn star who has had millions of pounds worth of surgery in a desperate bid to try to look young. Alas, I am just young-ish, at the ripe old age of 26yrs with a surgery free face, no botox, and no fillers, or believe me I’d expect to look a thousand times better if I had!

The comments I am reading online are hilariously addictive, and I find myself scrolling through them and chuckling over biscuits and lentils in the early hours of dressing gown time. People are actually having arguments about the size of my breasts, defending and attacking how women should properly measure their assets; and by way of winning the fight, keyboard warriors are correcting each others spelling and punctuation telling one another to get a life and STFU for good measure – that means shut the fudge up apparently? Politics, religion and demographics have also been dragged into the mix, and for as many people that are hailing me and showing the article to their wives and girlfriends, there are just as many who think I’m a typical bunny-boiling self-obsessed female who they’d never marry but would still “give her one though”. Perhaps I shall wear dark glasses and a duffle coat in public for the next couple of days, oh dear.

I wonder how different the public’s reaction would have been if I were referred to as a “taxi driving newly-married lesbian who uses elderly widowed neighbours sperm as a facial in order to appear older!” I would like to state that I am not a taxi driver, nor am I married, nor a lesbian, nor are my neighbours old or widowed and I most definitely don’t wish to purposely look older than I am. I do however like to blog about beauty, fashion, fitness and lifestyle which I find interesting and helpful. So I welcome you to have a read of my blogs and form your own opinion. And by that I mean share my opinion, I’m a perfectly normal female, it’s just society that’s weird. Obviously.

UPDATE: Hashtag #Sperm Domination

Just when I thought it couldn’t get any crazier, after appearing in hundreds of random peoples pictures and profiles across my social media accounts from them posting the magazine article and sharing with their friends, it now seems that I have conquered the hashtag of #sperm. Wow.

Now there are many hashtags that I like to use when describing my pictures, mostly #cute #sweet #adorable #happy and #love, but I can safely say that sperm has never been one of them. To have thought that one day it would be possible to dominate a single word from the English dictionary, my chance to leave my stamp on life, my moment of shining glory and claim to questionable social media recognition; and of all the words in all of the world, I end up with sperm. Which is a noun, semen; synonyms – semen, seminal fluid, spermatic fluid, seed, ejaculate, emission; milt; technicalspermatozoa; informalcome, cum; vulgar slangjism, jissom, jizz; vulgar slang – spunk. Hmm. Well let’s look on the bright side here, at least it’s one rung higher on the ladder than ass.

UPDATE: Comments From Across The Web

As I’ve been laughing so hard my ribs now hurt, I thought that I would share with you a little taster of the comments posted about my magazine article online. I have not edited, censored or corrected any of the feedback or spelling. I had absolutely no involvement in the content other than copying and pasting quotes to my blog here. I welcome you all to pull up a chair, pour yourself a nice brew and get ready for a taste of keyboard warriors, strange strangers and angry girls. What the fudge…!? As this may be a little confusing to distinguish between my thoughts and the publics comments in plain font, I shall be chirping in with my two cents in red throughout. Enjoy!

It seems that some men are a little concerned that providing their sperm for a girls facial may actually be used for an ulterior motive…

[–]sexual_camel 51 points 1 day agoI don’t think I would just hand over my sperm to a girl who may have a few screws missing. Who knows where else she could put it [–]jesse059 17 points 1 day agoTHIS! never know that day the switch flips from i dont want wrinkles to im bat shit crazy i need a baby… [–]SCTetra 1 point 22 hours agoJust get her to sign a form saying you are not responsible for shit. Same thing like dontating sperm at a sperm bank.

Like a sperm release form?

[–]AllSpunOut 1 point 17 hours agoSperm denatures very quickly. You’d be safe. [–]Techoblanco_Mod 182 points 1 day agoOne girl I slept with did this but I was freaked out because she locked herself in the bathroom with my cum. I thought she was trying to get pregnat or something so I kicked the door open and she was just rubbing it on her face.

How funny, he thought she was being a psycho but she was just having a sperm facial!

[–]DarkDubzs 1 point 11 hours agoShe has a nice couple of semen extractors.

I think he’s talking about my breasts?

[–]kirliry 4 points 23 hours agoShe has some big tits [–]kankouillotte 129 points 1 day agoBoobs like that must help the delivery speed.

I wouldn’t really know.

[–]Unicorn_Ranger 6 points 18 hours agoThose are also very wrinkle free.

Very observational.

[–]crappysurfer[S] 25 points 1 day agoPlus, refrigerating things doesn’t really kill most bacteria, it just slows them down and/or induces dormancy.

It seems people are becoming concerned about the ability of my fridge to house the sperm before it reaches my face.

[–]stealingyourpixels 3 points 22 hours agoIsn’t there bacteria everywhere? [–]moush -1 points 20 hours agoNot in your body’s closed systems. Urine and Semen are going to be completely sterile until they come into contact with bacteria from the outside world. [–]DeniedClub 23 points 22 hours agoWell if the temperature falls below 40F then bacteria can’t grow (but it doesn’t kill any bacteria that was already there) [–]sprankton 34 points 1 day agoMore importantly, it would coagulate the semen. [–]zorn96 3 points 4 hours agoyes and no. there are a lot of coagulation factors such as the number of ions in solution, the weight of the molecules, the length and polarity of the molecules, etc.if proteins denature and break down then this can cause coagulation, however you can also have coagulation without this. you can also have proteins denature without coagulation. of course, in this case, coagulation is being used misleadingly and they just mean that the hydrates would evaporate from solution, leaving a near-solid precipitate

That’s pretty deep…

[–]simpersly 16 points 23 hours agoThe danger zone is between 40 and 140 °F ( 4 to 60 °C) give or take a few depending on the food. [–]supercool5000 2 points 16 hours agoMy understanding is that fish used for sushi is frozen in a particular way to kill microorganisms, including bacteria. Is that not the case? [–]Cocktorpedo 2 points 10 hours agoi’ve never heard of that. it’s almost certainly frozen to preserve its shelf life though. [–]burlesqueduck 39 points 1 day agoyour phone has more bacteria per area on it than your toilet any cup of water has at least a few microbes swimming around in it. you only get sick if there’s a lot of them so they can easily start a colony (and if they’re harmful) every day of your life you have billions of micro-organisms in your intestinal tract. Some of them are even so important to you that you’d die without them. molds are constantly trying to grow in your lungs and your body’s defense is always going to try and weed them out.

Have I inspired others to try it from my results?

[–]Maclimes 134 points 1 day agoI knew a woman who swore that this works. Every morning, she would jerk off her husband before work, apply semen to face, and then … I don’t know. I guess let it set?All I know is, she had nice skin. Maybe it was genetic. Maybe it was cum face. I dunno.

I think men have a greater understanding than women on this matter.

[–]Nerobus 53 points 1 day agoAs much as I hate to admit it, I have noticed it has a nice effect on my hands.. [–]poo-poo 8 points 8 hours agoI’ll never forget the day my dad shook my hand and stated “you have such soft hands, these are hands that have never worked a hard day in his life.” Semi jokingly. But internally all I could think was “Well I jerked it with lotion last night, so that could be it too.”

Slightly creepy.

[–]hjonsey 5 points 21 hours agoActually had it on my face by chance last night and I noticed the softness this morning. It does work, number one rule is you gotta protect the eyes (I had to learn that the hard way) [–]explainittomeplease 9 points 18 hours agoI used to do this. My ex used to love coming on my face, and I would just massage it all over and wash it off 10 minutes later.I swear, my face was softer, and I broke out less. If I started dating another guy that enjoys spilling his seed on my face, I’d start doing it again.

Ok, if we really have to bring up my age then let’s do this quickly. I’m 26yrs old/young whichever way you look at it, and the article states that.

[–]bobojojo12 7 points 22 hours agoWow I thought she was inn her mid 30s

Thanks a lot!

[–]monga18 2 points 8 hours agoAnd she looks… exactly 26.

That’s more like it!

[–]wilkes9042 75 points 1 day agoI know, right? That’s all I could think about. She’s twenty fucking six. No wonder she looks young. [–]JewBacon 30 points 1 day agoShe doesn’t even look 26. She looks like she’s in her late thirties, early forties.

Oh. Em. Gee. Oh no you did-un JewBacon!?

[–]leif777 3 points 1 day agoI love the hair in pigtails too… she’s trying really hard

My hair isn’t in pigtails and I didn’t even bother to straighten it, it’s in a ponytail to keep it out of the way for my facial…

[–]Yrrebbor 7 points 1 day agoShe’s had plastic surgery, and it sounds like she decided to start using semen as an alternative to the annual Botox treatments she was already getting.

I’ve never had botox, let alone on an annual basis. I wanted to try a natural non-invasive remedy. Awks.

[–]wilkes9042 0 points 1 day agoThe difference is that she takes it from a pot, that has been prepared for her – it’s fucking weird. Clinical. Now if it was straight from Ben’s beanbag, delivered by means of ejaculation – straight to her grid. I’d be cool. Ben would be happy too. But no, she’s a fucking creep about it.If I was Ben – (which I am, but not that Ben) I’d be wanking dogs off into a pot, then I’d gleefully deliver it to her to smear all over her ridiculous 26 year old face.

I’m a creep for NOT playing with my friends man piece? And Ben writing this comment, who isn’t the actual Ben, thinks Ben should trick me with dog semen instead? Ben who isn’t the actual Ben, does this work well for you?

[–]iamnotimportant 15 points 1 day agoI see you didn’t read it, it’s not for anti aging it’s to treat rosacea, apparently it’s reddening of the skin.

Actually it’s a compilation of gradual age, sleep deprivation and sensitive skin that I require facials, the rosacea certainly doesn’t help with dehydration, but I wouldn’t class sperm as a treatment for rosacea.

[–]sin_eater82 2 points 1 day agoDid you read it? The woman herself claims that it smooths out wrinkles.It is mentioned that she has rosecea, but she talks about wrinkles and this getting rid of them. [–]iamnotimportant 2 points 20 hours agoYes… but she talks about rosacea as the cause of those wrinkle and fine lines.“I suffer from rosacea and I’d started to get fine lines around my eyes and mouth” Her quote.

No, rosacea hasn’t caused my wrinkles, not that I’m a wrinkly mammoth, just when I smile or frown or have an expression on my face you can see lines. Rosacea contributes to my dry and heated sensitive skin which is why I find facials essential.

[–]sin_eater82 1 point 20 hours agoI have blue eyes and I like orange juice.I understand why you may have taken it that way, especially if you weren’t already familiar with rosacea. But i think it’s just slightly poorly written.Wrinkles are not a symptom of rosacea to my knowledge.Now, this is a woman who is putting her friend’s cum on her face and talking about it in a print magazine with photos of her with it on her face. Could she possibly think that rosacea is causing wrinkles whether it actually does or not? It’s possible. But I think it was more like “I have blue eyes and like orange juice” than “I have blue eyes and because of that I like orange juice”. Although, more related in that they’re both skin things.

I do have blue eyes and I do like orange juice, how strange? Maybe this is making me look so old?

[–]iamnotimportant 1 point 19 hours agoK, so the girl is an idiot we’ve established that. Doesn’t change the sentence composition, she’s not doing for anti-age. there is no mention of that, all I pointed out. All I pointed out was her reasons for doing it, which is apparently rosacea, you go ahead and research this condition and try to prove that it’s not a cause for whatever stupid shit is going thru her head. You’re going too far.

Where have ‘we’ established I’m an idiot? I mean, really?

[–]sin_eater82 1 point 19 hours agoI didn’t research it. I knew it already and just provided sources for your benefit. You’re going too far with your assumptions.But let’s talk about sentence composition.I x AND y means that I x and I (also) y. It does not mean that x causes y.Now what do people mean when they saying “anti-aging”? They mean getting rid of wrinkles.The girl specifically talks about this smoothing out wrinkles even outside of the sentence that talks about rosacea and wrinkles. You cannot deny that she talks about smoothing out wrinkles. It’s in the article. You could deny that smoothing out wrinkles has anything to do with anti-aging, but that would be a bit silly.You are correct that rosacea was one reason she gave. But she also gave getting rid of wrinkles as a reason. People can do things for multiple reasons. Things can treat multiple things.

Go to war on those keyboards random girls!

[–]iamnotimportant 1 point 18 hours agoStubborn? Pedantic? Scrupulous? Painstaking? Perfectionist? Fussy? What’s the word I’m looking for? I’m sure you’ll give me a short essay. For the fun of it.

Over to Ben…

[–]nthensome 73 points 1 day ago*SHHH, her ‘friend’ has got a good thing going here.Don’t ruin it for him. [–]Pkacua 1 point 1 day agoShe just wants to rub sperm on her face.

Erm… Yes and no.

[–]Amtye 4 points 18 hours agoWell I can’t tell if Ben has a decent or miserable gig here but either way it’s the beginning to a quirky romcom

I can see it now.

[–]hmcbabe 210 points 1 day agoHer friend Ben donates sperm for Tracy’s unusual facialsThere is friend zoning, and then there is this [–]Tsurii 14 points 1 day ago“Maybe if I poke her with it she’ll be in the mood” [–]normalism 17 points 23 hours agoluckiest guy on the planet. [–]KittyKat1986 88 points 1 day agoHe’s just doing what any fitness coach would do. [–]msfrance 6 points 23 hours agoOh Ben…that poor bastard…

Seriously he’s just a friend who isn’t secretly in love with me!

[–]amolad 55 points 1 day agoThere’s nothing “romantic” between her and Ben.That’s what she thinks. [–]prodikl 5 points 13 hours agoso damn close, but ultimately friendzoned [–]ProcrastinHater 21 points 1 day agoNow we just have to convince the rest of them. [–]VictoriousPickle 35 points 1 day agoIn the larger scheme of life… aren’t we all Ben?Ben stands for every one of us. Young and old. Every male in existence.Let us stand together and shout from the rooftops.“OMG, I AM BEN” “OMG, I AM BEN”

Wow, Ben has extracted blood from the stone that is man. I feel as though I should bow my head for some reason or at least toast a glass of wine to this moment.

[–]stephenjr311 32 points 1 day agoUntil she realizes that it was something special about Ben’s sperm and other guys’ sperm doesn’t work. Then the tables will truly have turned for Ben and he’ll be calling all the shots. [–]MrPeoples 4 points 18 hours agoDoes she not have a sexual partner? I hope Ben doesn’t think he has a chance or something.

I’m sorry but ‘single’ surely means no, who in their right mind would be in a relationship and seek sperm for a facial elsewhere over that of their partner? I’m not weird!

[–]MrPeoples 3 points 13 hours agoShe’s obviously crazy. We can’t rule out that she uses Ben for his refrigerated and scented sperm, friendzones the shit out of him, doesn’t let her sexual partners untreated sperm anywhere near her face, and is too embarrassed to ask any of her actual sexual partners to donate their sperm because of the absolutely ridiculous process it entails.

How many sexual partners do these men believe a single 40-something-looking woman has the ability to harvest sperm from? Wait, I can answer this for you. None. Just one health conscious friend who I trust to bring me human semen in a tub.

[–]Fenor 103 points 1 day agocould we request an AMA from her friend Ben?

I had to look AMA up, apparently it’s internet slang for ‘ask me anything,’ I presume they want to know Ben’s emotional investment.

[–]taishidaioh 19 points 1 day agoYep. He somehow made her think this actually works. I’d love to have an AMA with that guy. [–]PieterPlopplop 58 points 1 day agoI think it’s fair to say the person in this picture has never had semen on her face.

Apart from the semen on my face in this picture of course…

[–]inhale_exhale_repeat 1 point 23 hours agoI dunno, I’m 25 and I’ve already noticed some sun damage and “worry lines”. I use anti-aging stuff too but I wouldn’t go so far as a facial. [–]captain_craptain 386 points 1 day agoSeriously. How do you not respond to her request for your spunk with a counter-offer that she harvest it herself? Tell her that way he won’t have to charge her for the collection and delivery.

Ben doesn’t charge me, he doesn’t usually sell and deliver his sperm to women, but he brings some over to me when we catch up each week.

[–]DidntGetYourJoke 2 points 1 day agoGoddamn, when will high quality television like that come to the US? [–]thinkinggrenades 22 points 1 day agoShe clearly absorbs the life energy of the sperm.

Clearly.

[–]A1A5KA 51 points 1 day agoHere is Tracy’s own page. It’s just her thing to do with Ben’s sperm, until she needs to find someone else’s sperm to use.

Things to do today: Replace Ben as and when. Or not.

[–]Whuzza_reddit 30 points 1 day agoAfter reading her page, pretty clear this is all a marketing ploy. She’s a genius.

Is it a marketing ploy? Or is it my beauty blog that was picked up by the press and carried by social media? Maybe I should actually clarify this just incase, it is infact my beauty blog that was picked up by the press and carried by social media.

[–]Higher_Primate 43 points 1 day agoNah if she was a marketing genius thery’d be more pictures of her tits.

You’d think so?

[–]bastegod 4 points 1 day agoCame for the ridiculous story; stayed for the tits. [–]captain_craptain 12 points 1 day agoThis girl is weird. I like her though.

God bless the internet.

UPDATE: 29/04/14 Hello Australia, Indonesia, Italy & Singapore

So it’s been a few days now since I’ve dared to check the feedback surrounding Semengate, and it seems the world is still spreading the love of my blog review. One article I found both heart warming and disturbing at the same time was in Italy from Corriere Adriatico:

The title translates from Italian as:”Tracy, from ugly to sexy star: Use against sperm facial wrinkles” hmm, thanks for calling me an ugly child, the first paragraph reads:

“LONDON – Tracy Kiss is an English model of Hungarian origin, well known at home for his stunning performance in front of goal. The 26 year old, however, has not always been so lovely and launches a singular beauty secret to women.

Tracy, who lives in Buckinghamshire, in fact told that he had started to suffer from the age of 12 years, a particular form of acne rosacea. That problem during the early teenage years, he had exposed widespread derision at school, where he was targeted by bullies, poor fools, they did not see the potential of the girl.”

As you can imagine the rest of the article is entirely misinformed and Narnia inspired. Now there are a few possible reasons behind this strangely twisted statement, either Google translate is having an off-day, the journalist who wrote this doesn’t know their masculine and feminine singular and plurals, or chinese-whispers have spread to such an extent around the world that I have now morphed into a male goal keeper with acne. I would just like to state for the record here that I was born female, albeit with uneven breasts which I later had surgery for, but I have no connection with balls, whether it be through goal keeping or otherwise. And finally I have never had acne, I’m aware that there is a form of rosacea which is based upon this, but mine causes redness and sensitivity. I am not a spotty manly goalie. Yet. I have also had a few more choking-on-a-hob-nob moments when flicking through new online comments, note to self, stop snacking when reading offensive and/or derogatory feedback. Here are just a couple that left me creasing:

christmas 19-04-2014, 09:44 PM

i think it is a lie…a lie to cover her sexual fantasy and fetish, most probably

Sure…

CandyDoll 20-04-2014, 02:17 AM

Originally Posted by smoob:

She is 26 years old and a single parent of two, a boy and a girl.

yup and the two kids, if I’m not wrong are fathered by two different men..

Candydoll has been doing her homework, I like how she points out my children have different fathers, clearly crucial information to assert her online message board status

Originally Posted by Mirror:

Think her ex husband cannot give her constant supply that y the relationship cannot work out bah …

not sure if that’s the reason, but think she was not married before..

As Mirror ponders over me bleeding my ex-husband dry of semen, Candydoll knows the score! I have never been married, a little strange how she knows this though?

NuttyProfessor 18-04-2014, 08:16 PM

tracy kiss… name sounds like a prawn star

An acne ridden Hungarian male goal keeping vegan prawn star no less!

And it was surely only a matter of time before somebody made one of those funny words over a random picture about Ben and his sperm. I take my hat off to the guys at Joy Reactor for this little wonder nugget as it made me chuckle. Ben is still just a friend, I haven’t broke his heart, led him on or let him down. Men and women can be friends without anything underhand going on.

And now for a whistle stop tour of yesterdays link backs to my site. Here we have a sex toy report from Australia:

A splosh or two from Singapore:

I have no idea what I’m doing in Indonesia:

And finally some illiteracy from Italy:

UPDATE: 29/10/14

As it’s been a good few months since I last updated this blog post I thought I should give you all a heads up, oh behave! As I wanted to fill you in on the progress, so far me and Ben are still unmarried and he hasn’t declared his undying love for me as he kindly continues to help me with my beauty regime which I am most pleased by.

I have had calls from television stations and documentaries to talk about the semen facial and my experience of it, however I haven’t taken part in any specific media to date as I’ve been rather busy doing other things such as turning 27 – eek – and watching Meerkat Manor on TV with the children whilst drinking green tea and sewing pumpkin patches for Halloween.

Every now and then I get the odd person asking me about the semen facial, which I’m always happy to answer questions about and give my opinion. Surprisingly it’s not a very successful chat up line from guys and I’m enjoying being a single parent to my two children, with Millisent having just celebrated her 7th birthday this month. Now I really do feel old! And funnily enough the original comments about me looking older than 26 are becoming more valid as I extinguish yet another set of candles on my birthday cake. I had a fabulous 27th birthday and am making it my aim to find a husband who will provide me with frequent facials, quite how I’ll work this into conversation I don’t know, perhaps after meeting the parents and parking my slippers at the door?

My semen facial video on Youtube is nearing 30,000 views which is pretty jolly as it means the message is out there and I hope that people are enjoying seeking natural free alternatives to their beauty regimes. If it helps just one person to live a more comfortable life then it’s worth it.

On another note, checking the traffic referrals to my site today I came across these comments at the top of the list on a forum, again I haven’t edited or changed any names, spellings or mistakes and my opinion is in red:

-Geokinesis

Well after you’ve had however many wanks a day don’t waste your spunk: (a screenshot of my semen facial magazine article)

-BottledBodhisvata

Jesus christ the British are so bad at sex

Who said anything about British sex? It’s strictly donation only regarding my facial, but I’d like to think that I know a face from a phallus in the bedroom!

-razorrozar

There is no way this woman is not a porn star. Tracy Kiss? Really?

I have no doubt that you’ve googled me because the key words came up in the traffic terms to my site! I’m sorry to disappoint you that I’m not a pornstar just because my maiden name is Tracy Kiss, and funnily enough neither is my mother, grandmother or great grandmother either.

-Stoatbringer

26-year olds really do struggle to look young.

I turned 27 this month and this comment makes my frown lines all the more prominent. Thanks!

-Fathis Munk

You have NOT seen her site (including the story of her botched boob job with many many pictures.)

Have you not? Of course, you probably just read the pictures as you;d have realised that my boob job wasn’t ‘botched’ as I had private self-funded surgery at Harley Street in London for £4,000 which eight years later was discovered to be made from illegal PIP silicone because of a dodgy company in France scamming the system to line their pockets. Hundreds of thousands of women across Europe were affected by the horrendous scandal, including NHS and cancer patients. So I didn’t suffer a botched boob job, but collapsed implants eight years after my successful surgery, like many others.

-MrAptronym

I feel so loving sorry for her kid. Sure, lots of pornstars have kids, but how many feature their children on their page about botched surgery and spreading sperm all over your face? That kid is now associated directly.

I’m presuming that the moderators of this forum comically change the word F’ing to ‘loving’ here. I’m not entirely sure which kid you feel sorry for, my son or daughter singularly? But can I guess my daughter? No wait, son! Yes pornstars may well have children, something of which I know precisely nothing about. But mentioning the fact that I am a parent on a blog about beauty is hardly damaging my children. If I didn’t include all of the attributing factors to the condition of my skin and seeking a natural remedy to restore hydration, one being the fact that I’m a flustered single parent with a constant lack of sleep, then I wouldn’t be addressing the issue at hand. Please excuse the pun. As if you compared my skin to another 27yr old lady who has no children and sleeps 10hrs a night then I’m sure we’d be very different indeed.

-Wandle Cax

Well at least she’s a “humorous vegetarian”. They are so much more likable than those humorless vegetarians.

Somebody has read my bio. I quite like the witt towards my witt.

-im pooping!

so where the titty pictures?

Sorry was this directed at me or your mum?

-Magikarpal Tunnel

She looks pretty loving old for being 26.

God bless the moderators for changing F to Loving. Love you too!

-im pooping!

Actually I saw the video clip and she seems kind of repulsive in general. Then again I’m a 28 year old virgin so I follow the orgasm a day theory.

I’m guessing this is in reference to my Youtube video about the facial. Kind of? And in general? Well I can live with that, nothing too set in stone there and it’s always good to leave room for improvement. Generally.

-Angela Christine

What a loving idiot.

I want to meet these moderators and ching tea-cups with them. How this makes me smile! 🙂

-Fathis Munk

Goes on to have several boobjobs.

Several? I only have two breasts, one set were removed because they turned out to be PIP and the second was a reconstruction. Perhaps there’s more than one Tracy Kiss!? Breastgate? Facts straight?

-monkeytennis

*rubs personal trainer’s baby batter onto her face every day*

*sigh* Not everyday monkeytennis, just most.

Dear oh dear. How comical it is to read an internet forum filled with ill-informed opinions of yourself. Despite the updated knowledge of strangers debating my surname and body parts, I have however discovered this evening that red seedless grapes are far safer to nibble on whilst reading through comments, as when you laugh you don’t have to worry about choking on the little crumbs you get from biscuits and cookies. Always good to know. Have a fab evening and Happy Halloween to all!

UPDATE: 21/08/15

I thought I’d best give you an update on semengate as it’s been nearly a year and a half since my beauty blog went viral, and much to my dismay I continue to get older whenever I eat my birthday cake. I know what you’re thinking, just don’t eat it – right? But it’s harder said than done. And now I’m just over a month away from turning 28! Eek!

Ben is still my friend, hoorah, and he still pops over for a cup of tea and a delivery of otherwise toilet-bound semen which I very much appreciate. I’ve also now tested the direct delivery method with a non-Ben and I can highly recommend it, we all knew it was bound to happen eventually because I’m such a curious cat. Although you don’t get as even a coverage as when you apply it yourself and quite a bit can be wasted in the hair which sucks. I’d suggest rather than tipping your head back for direct delivery which is often the most favourable stance, brace yourself, close your eyes and be brave by going full frontal as it’s an easier target to hit and doesn’t end up all over the place or wasted.

My face continues to feel beautifully soft and healthy after each semen facial, and I have now joined the botox brigade to remove the lines on my forehead because I wanted to have something to compare it to, I’ve only had it once and I’m expecting it to run out by next month which will kindly give me back my forehead creases but now I can say that I’ve seen both sides of the beauty world. The semen facial isn’t about turning back the clock like a facelift would, but more improving the quality and surface of my skin, which for that it still works wonders. Botox however made a great difference to my frown lines on my forehead and I hardly even felt the little prick. Every pun intended. It all depends on what you’re prepared to spend and put up with.

I get quite a lot of mail and messages from people asking me if I’m the ‘real semen facial girl’ and as far as I know there’s only one of me in this world, but I have had quite a few strange people take my pictures and make fake profiles in my name pretending to be me, but fortunately my ID and birth certificate is always on my side to confirm my identity, and I suspect the people who think they’re me may be taking happy pills or deficient in vitamin C from a lack of sunlight. It takes all sorts I suppose!

Keep smiling, keep sharing with me your thoughts and experiences of the semen facial and never be afraid or embarrassed to talk about the beauty tips and tricks that work best for you. It’s 2015 and we’re well past giggling behind our hands. Own your actions and enjoy your youth. Can you freeze birthday cake? Or will bacteria form? 🙂

UPDATE 10/11/15 Semen Facial Demonstration

I have so many people asking me questions about the semen facial, how I do it and what it feels like so I thought the easiest way to answer your questions would be to show you in a video. I hope that this explains it all a little better and you can see first hand why I love it so much.

I had a feeling that it might blow up in the press again – let’s just allow that little pun there shall we. So here’s a round-up of world news and current views on semengate, my inbox is going off right now and I’m getting the most hilarious and amazing requests, so take a seat and perhaps eat some pineapple whilst you read this.

As always the general public never disappoint with their comments, the majority of guys tagging their friends calling them w*ankers or complimenting them on their soft face/hands/stomach:

-ChipotleNiagara

I for one can’t see anything wrong with it. It’s not like women have never had semen on their face before is it ? Also, I would point out that Miss Kiss has been involved in the self extraction of a great deal of semen by numerous individuals, all impressed with her outstanding …. skills.

My only concern is that this door to door delivery time may reduce the effectiveness of the solution. Therefore, an on site donor is probably much more effective in the provision of fresh product.

It just so happens that I have some free time coming up and could definitely under cut the competition, regularly.

When I find a husband I will most certainly toss my pot away!

‪-John Coyne‬ · Langley high school manchester

If only we could convice all women that this works hahaha

It actually does…

-Real Snyder And your sexy as hell two pluses

Unlike · Reply · Message · 1 · 8 hrs

-Dan Judge I bet her boyfriend is having the time of his life

Like · Reply · 503 · 9 hrs

I’m single *tumbleweed*

-Benjamin Shadden Well. I don’t know about you, but when I cum I keep it in a jar to put on my skin later. That’s normal, right?

Like · Reply · 406 · 10 hrs

Totally normally Ben

-Amrit ‘Ace’ Lulla Where is your feminism now?

Like · Reply · 281 · 10 hrs

‪-James F Liesicke‬ · Driver at Cab Driver

Wife material

Thank you, 99% wifey 1% elastane

‪-Adrian Halligan‬ · Works at Self-Employed

spread the word ,no man would refuse a chance to enhance such beauty.

Spread the word as well as sperm

-tewkewl 3 hours ago

Dang… I wish I was your husband. every freakin morning? damn. lucky guy.

I’m a three times a day kind of girl

-Euclides287 8 hours ago

British women are awesome!

Pip pip!

-Halil Halil Girls always used to comment that I have baby soft hands, and now I figured out why

Like · Reply · 235 · 9 hrs

-Brent Persad ‘not involved in the extraction.. Has a mate who delivers it in a take away pot’. This is a level of friendzone never seen before.

Like · Reply · 969 · 9 hrs

-Marissa McKenzie Tom Eccles she gets a mate to deliver it to her in a takeaway container holy hell friendzoned so hard

Like · Reply · 4 · 7 hrs

Yes, he’s a dear friend

-Emad Gical She must semen every night to keep stocks up.

Like · Reply · 391 · 10 hrs

I see what you did there Emad! High five

-Bernard Hillis This is why men don’t get wrinkly belly buttons

Like · Reply · 2 · 9 hrs

SO true

-Panagiotis Ampatzis “baby i need you to cum fast and many times” said no woman ever…. till now

Like · Reply · 2 · 8 hrs

I just had to reply to this guy, it was too tempting not to!

-Stuart Wood Perhaps it’s not the semen that makes babies skin soft, but the ovum. Try slavering your period all over your face, should work out just fine

Like · Reply · 50 · 9 hrs

-Tracy Kiss I’ll let you know how that goes in four days time thanks for the tip ?

Like · Reply · 22 · 8 hrs

-Natasha Natabus Ahahahahahaha omg omg I’m dying of laughter! Lol x

Like · Reply · 3 · 7 hrs

-Mike Doonunder Bloody hell…. Hahaha

Like · Reply · 5 · 6 hrs

-Udom Khchao Lol in China you pay like $60 American dollars for a jar of a random guy’s jizz coz it works say’s the Chinese.my mate dave had a rash on his back then his started rubbing his cum on his back now it’s gone.

Like · Reply · 2 · 9 hrs

-Peter Vallance That’s why she has a baby face

Like · Reply · 1 · 9 hrs

Thank you once again to my loyal followers for supporting me at this time, I’m pleased that so many of you have actually watched the full video to see how semen helps with my skin condition rather than just reading the punchy headlines in the press and freaking out. As with everything you should never judge a book by its cover, I appreciate your love and support in helping me to help others. Have a great day!