Conditions are favorable for shark-infested tornadoes in New York City tonight, between 9 and 11 p.m. ET. SyFy will stream the gory spectacle live: Sharknado 2, the Second One – when we expect an upgrade from Sharknado “watch” to Sharknado “warning.”

Expect to see actors Ian Ziering and Tara Reid battling the flesh-eating fish. You may also spy some celebrity cameos (Vivica A. Fox, Mark McGrath or “Sugar Ray”, Judah Friedlander, Kelly Osbourne, Andy Dick, The Naked Cowboy, Perez Hilton, Al Roker, Matt Lauer, Kelly Ripa, Michael Strahan, and Jared the Subway guy).

Locals in the Big Apple are rushing preparations to completion – here’s a visual tour:

1. Maps show where the worst impacts are expected

A map of #Sharknado Evacuation & Safety Zones from the Office of Airborne Aquatic Crisis Mgmt (Love Zone F’d!) pic.twitter.com/uxRzKtmcvw — Ted A’Zary (@Syfy) July 23, 2014

2. Residents are hoarding emergency kits

3. Wearable forecasts have hit the streets

Ha ha! Partly cloudy with a 60% chance of a #sharknado. My son swiped the t-shirt from me before I could wear it. :-) pic.twitter.com/bUKyGgG3iz — Joanne Feldman FOX 5 (@JoanneFOX5) July 30, 2014

4. The Weather Channel’s meteorologists are offering expert commentary

Check out the line-up in the SHARKNADO promo poster! Thanks to @shawnmilrad! #Sharknado pic.twitter.com/wG3OGTcQv8 — Mike Seidel (@mikeseidel) July 30, 2014

5. Citizens are stocking up on arms

You won’t believe what they’re killing sharks with this time around! #Sharknado2 premieres TONIGHT at 9|8c. https://t.co/02IsJaUod9 — Sharknado (@SharknadoSyfy) July 30, 2014

6. Mops are in high demand

You’ll need a bigger mop for this mess! #Sharknado2 destroys the Big Apple TONIGHT on @Syfy at 9|8c. https://t.co/ueJe2KIN1i — Sharknado (@SharknadoSyfy) July 30, 2014

7. Chainsaw manuals have become must-read material

8. There’s Sharknado headgear

9. Sharknado eating

10. Sharknado drinking

I predict Sharknado 2 will be partly entertaining, partly insipid, and mostly a bloody waste of time. The Twitter commentary will surely, however, be worth paying attention to – if it can survive the onslaught.

Experts with some prior knowledge of this coming storm don’t seem too impressed.

Washington Post TV critic Hank Steuever says VIP previewers were less than captivated: “As hard as we howled at the ghastliness being projected on the wall above us, I didn’t see anyone at the “Sharknado” party who was giving the film his or her full attention, especially after the first 30 minutes. Our phones still had our attention, as we tweeted out and hash-tagged our velvet-rope experience of the almighty sharknado — this constant attempt to take part in a storm without being devoured by it.”

The New York Times’ Neil Genzlinger feels the film falls short of its potential: “The underlying philosophy, with the promotion and the film itself, seems to have been that when you have a movie about a shark rainstorm, there’s no such thing as overkill. That’s almost true. “Sharknado 2” intends to be nothing more than dumb fun, and it succeeds well enough at that. But it also leaves you regretting that the “Sharknado” team …. didn’t reach for camp greatness.”

CNN reports: “Syfy has already signed on for a third “Sharknado” movie.” Ugh!

Will you be watching?

Related:

Sharknado: The best of the Twitter swarm

SyFy’s disaster double whammy: “Sharknado” and 9 other horrifying weather movies