To those of us who pay attention to such things, the Trump spalpeens have had a ridiculous couple of days as far as their being the primary surrogates for their ridiculous father and the ridiculous campaign he is running for president. First, in the wake of having been the primary spokesperson for her father's kabuki childcare plan, Ivanka Trump found herself hustling away from the blistering questioning of a writer for Cosmopolitan.

According to The Hill, Ms. Trump objected to the idea that she should be asked to specify when exactly that plan was designed to make sense.

Cosmopolitan reporter Prachi Gupta appeared to rattle the 34-year-old daughter of Donald Trump when she asked her in a phone interview to clarify whether the GOP nominee's plan would address paternity leave or cover leave for gay couples when the parents are both men. "So it's meant to benefit, whether it's in same-sex marriages as well, to benefit the mother who has given birth to the child if they have legal married status under the tax code," Trump said. "Well, what about gay couples, where both partners are men?" Gupta asked. Trump responded that the "intention" of her father's plan was to "help mothers in recovery in the immediate aftermath of childbirth." The reporter did not let up, once again asking her to clarify how the plan would cover gay couples "where the two parents are both men." Gupta asked if the policy would not allow leave for fathers "because they don't need to recover for anything?" "Well, those are your words, not mine," Trump responded, laughing, according to Cosmopolitan. "The plan, right now, is focusing on mothers, whether they be in same-sex marriages or not."

And then what, LA Times?

But when the Cosmo interviewer challenged Trump over whether the plan would cover fathers, as well as Donald Trump's 2004 comments calling pregnancy an inconvenience, she ended the phone call. "It's surprising to see this policy from him today. Can you talk a little bit about those comments, and perhaps what has changed?" interviewer Prachi Gupta asked. "So I think that you have a lot of negativity in these questions, and I think my father has put forth a very comprehensive and really revolutionary plan to deal with a lot of issues," Ivanka Trump responded. "So I don't know how useful it is to spend too much time with you on this if you're going to make a comment like that."

You are not useful. Please find your way to the dumpster out back.

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But that was nothing compared to the performance of the elder tsarevitch, who has spent a week demonstrating exactly how much of a problem Hillary Rodham Clinton has with "transparency." First, about his father's tax returns, Junior gave the game away:

"Because he's got a 12,000-page tax return that would create … financial auditors out of every person in the country asking questions that would detract from (his father's) main message."

The main message of the campaign being, of course, that his old man is not a career grifter who is now working on the greatest con in a career of them. But the tsarevitch wasn't through, as The Atlantic tells us. Having said something preposterous, he followed that up by saying something tasteless.

The media has been her number one surrogate in this. Without the media, this wouldn't even be a contest, but the media has built her up. They've let her slide on every indiscrepancy, on every lie, on every DNC game trying to get Bernie Sanders out of this thing. If Republicans were doing that, they'd be warming up the gas chamber right now.

Leave aside the outright mendacious lunacy that "the media" has let HRC "slide on every discrepancy." Junior's gift for Stormfront metaphors proves (again) that the one great uncovered story of this campaign is what truly horrible people these are.

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Charles P. Pierce Charles P Pierce is the author of four books, most recently Idiot America, and has been a working journalist since 1976.

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