Q: How can I reduce stress in my life?

A: The conventional belief has been that work is stressful and home life is not. A new study by Penn State University found the opposite is true. People surveyed reported more stress at home than at work. That was true regardless of gender, occupation, marital status, children or whether people liked their job. The only exception was people making more than $75,000 a year. The study didn't explain why higher salaries produced more stress.

There were numerous reasons why work was less stressful. At work you listen to other workers' problems and are supportive, but you don't make their stress your stress. At work you can close your door, put on headphones and not many workers will interrupt you. At work your efforts are appreciated by your boss and co-workers. You get regular feedback on how you are doing. At work you get paid. That's very satisfying and gratifying. Pay is a well-recognized measure of your value. At work you can take a psychological break, have coffee and socialize with co-workers. At work you can get better at your job. You have the satisfaction of seeing your competence grow and you may be recognized and praised for it. At work you are treated with respect. Common workplace etiquette enforces a minimal standard of co-worker behavior. You are not publicly criticized. They don't frequently remind you of your failures. They don't show open anger.

Psychologists say you should try to make your home life more like the workplace. A major difference is probably that most work places are orderly and well organized. Managers work hard to maintain order and organization because they know disorder creates inefficiency and low productivity. Managers don't over commit the schedule. Homes tend to over commit and try to pack too much activity into each day, especially if there are children. Peer pressure dictates children must participate in an endless list of activities. Parents probably need to manage their personal schedules and children's schedule like business managers do. Try to schedule a little quite time for each spouse. Recognition and appreciation for each spouse for what they do in the home would help. Women often have a greater share of household chores and don't get recognized for what they do.

A major cause for stress is not feeling in control of your life or work situation. Anything to provide more choices and control helps the stress levels.

Ralph Coker, a retired refinery manager, volunteers with the local chapter of SCORE, counselors to small businesses.