Today’s Labor Day inspired image is totally, 100% WTF worthy and it comes from a Mannerist (aka, the wonky late Renaissance style) pleasure palace in Mantua. Take a look.

Giulio Romano, The Labor of the Golden Fleece in the Sala di Psichi, 1527-30, fresco. Palazzo del Te, Mantua

Disturbing right?!? Yes, you are looking at a bearded man who appears to have some white stuff coming out of his… penis… or maybe it’s just his beard? Yikes! WTF is going on?!?! Let’s zoom out from the image to see more.

Ah there we go. Phew, he’s just a personification of a river. Er, wait, so his beard blends in with the water being poured out of the vase (on the left) so that must mean that the white stuff coming from his … penis … is exactly what it looks like it is. This gigantic river god is indeed ejaculating a river!

The Palazzo del Te provides hands down the most insanely bizarre art historical immersion experience anywhere! The many frescoed rooms contain a unique blend of titillation, sensory overload, and raunchy humor. I’ll do a more proper entry on the Palazzo soon.

In the scene above, Psyche, the beautiful mortal girl with whom Cupid fell in love, is advised by a woman personifying a river reed (in green) on how best to attain the golden fleece desired by Venus. There’s a long and complicated back story short, which I’ve summarized in a blow-by-blow below:

- Venus was jealous of Psyche’s beauty so she asked Cupid to make Psyche fall in love with an ugly man

- Cupid inadvertently falls in love with Psyche

- Venus gets mad

- Cupid gets sad

- Psyche flees to a mountain (after a huge ordeal between her father and an oracle came to the conclusion that her beauty could only be appreciated by a god)

- Cupid makes love with her every night but asks that she not look upon him

- One night she does and realizes that it’s him

- Cupid gets pissed off

- Venus punishes Psyche with four impossible tasks including getting a fleece from a ferocious golden sheep (in the fresco above)

Got it? Well today is labor day, so read it again!