CHICAGO—Saying that he is here, that he is caring, and that he is available, local man Philip Gorney, who owns a 6-inch Mattel action figure of the comic book villain Bane, confirmed Thursday that he has love to give. “I could make somebody happy, I am loving, and I deserve to be happy, too,” said the 31-year-old man who has drawn several full-color illustrations of the superhero Swamp Thing, has seen the film Event Horizon nine times, and is a sensitive and giving person. “I am worth it. I am worth it and there is love inside of me.” Gorney then confirmed he is a human being with feelings before sitting down to replay The Secret Of Monkey Island on a classic PC game emulator.

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