ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

Whoops!

The nation’s most talented tennis player, Nick Kyrgios, accidentally won the Mexican Open last night in Acapulco.

It follows the 23-year-old’s four other accidental ATP Tour title wins, making it his fifth title overall.

Speaking to reporters after the historic victory, the locally-popular Canberran said he shocked even himself with the win.

“It was a complete accident,” he explained.

“Like, I, ah, you know. Just went out there to have a bit of fun, you know? Try to enjoy myself a bit. You know, kind of like because I’ve come all the way to Mexico, I might as well try to enjoy myself, you know?”

“And like, then off of a sudden I’m in the final and I’m hitting the ball real well and then like all of a sudden, it’s match point and the other guy like fucks it completely and I’m the winner,”

“Crazy.”

Despite Nick’s accidental victory, a number of tennis fans around the country have expressed their joy at the young fella’s efforts in Mexico, with dozens of tired old tennis identities weighing in with their unwarranted and unrequested opinions.

However, The Advocate has chosen not to republish anything written by them.

More to come,