Coming out as transgender is challenging for anyone, but breaking down one’s gender identity to their Latino family – who may not speak English, is probably very religious or may uphold machismo ideals – well, that adds a few more hindrances.

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Nicole Garcia, a counselor and gender specialist, knows this personally. When the Colorado mexicana was 43 years old, she finally accepted something that had placed her in a deep depression for many years: she’s a woman.

In 2005, the now 54-year-old mujer, completed her transition, a journey that took as much time outside of her doctor's office as it did in it. "Let’s just say, it took my family some time to come around," Garcia, who now dedicates her life to helping trans people navigate their identity and lead fulfilled lives, said.

With a master’s degree in counseling, and her own private practice, the Latina uses scholarship and personal experiences to support her clients. Oftentimes, that means helping them through the coming-out process.

Garcia spoke with Latina about coming out, and offered some advice to trans Latinos who are ready – and feel safe enough – to open up about their identity to their own familias.

1. Make sure you feel safe.

I’ll never push a client to come out if I feel like it will put them in danger. Sometimes, a father’s machismo may lead him to get violent with their child, particularly if it’s a son transitioning to a daughter. That loss of privilege and power is hard for them to accept. In situations likes these, what I call worst-case scenarios, I advise my clients to postpone coming out, especially if they are living under the same roof as the parent. I never want them to risk getting hurt physically or being kicked out of their home.

2. Have resources ready for them.

If they feel safe, the first step I tell my Latino clients to take is to gather resources for their family, in the language that they’re most proficient in. The National LGBTQ Task Force, HRC and UNID@S came together to create A La Familia, a guide for Latino families, and churches, about gender identity and sexual orientation, which I recommend. It's free and downloadable from their website, too. The pamphlets both help to explain the trans identity to Latino families, and the materials allow them to hear it from another source.

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