Back in 2009, notorious white-collar criminal Bernie Madoff pleaded guilty to 11 federal felonies, including securities fraud, wire fraud, and mail fraud, in an epic, multi-decade scam that saw him swindle thousands of clients out of almost $65 billion. At 81, he is virtually guaranteed to die in prison, having been sentenced to a century and a half behind bars for running the largest Ponzi scheme of all time. But, he thinks that he shouldn’t, and he’s pretty sure he knows just the guy to turn to for help on that front:

Bernie Madoff is asking that President Donald Trump reduce his 150-year prison sentence.… Madoff, who pleaded guilty to 11 crimes in 2009, is not asking for a pardon from the president. Instead, he is requesting clemency from Trump in the form of a sentence commutation, or reduction, according to an application filed with the Justice Department. A search of the Justice Department’s website shows that Madoff’s clemency request is “pending.”

It is not known if Trump will consider the request, or when he might do so. Madoff’s former lawyer, Ira Lee Sorkin, told CNBC he had no information about the request. The White House referred questions about Madoff’s bid for clemency to the Justice Department.

Marc Litt, the lead prosecutor in the criminal case against Madoff, told CNBC Wednesday, “Bernard Madoff received a fair and just sentence—one that both appropriately punished him for decades of criminal conduct that caused devastating damage to tens of thousands of victims, and sent a loud and clear message to deter would-be fraudsters. Madoff’s current request is the very definition of chutzpah.” Matthew Schwartz, who also helped prosecute the Ponzi schemer, was also skeptical. “It is hard to imagine a less sympathetic nonviolent offender than Bernard Madoff,” he told Bloomberg. “His tens of thousands of victims still continue to feel the profound and devastating harm from his decades-long fraud to this day.” Former federal prosecutor Randall Jackson, speaking for all of us, said: “That’s hilarious. I’m actually speechless.”

Madoff has previously suggested that his sentence is unfair, in part, because of the many “legitimate years” he was in business before becoming a professional thief. Shouldn’t he get credit for all the time he wasn’t committing crimes? “The biggest mistake I made was not going to trial,” he said during an April 2017 deposition. “I would have called in any number of expert witnesses [to prove I was once a savvy trader].”

You would think the odds of Trump granting Madoff’s request are probably quite low, but given who we’re talking about, they’re definitely above zero percent! Since taking office in January 2017, Trump has issued 10 pardons that all neatly fit with his primary worldview as a Hillary Clinton–hating psychopath who thinks cheating is fine as long as the cheater is rich. Beneficiaries have included Kristian Saucier, who pleaded guilty to unauthorized possession and retention of national defense information, who argued at his sentencing that he should have received probation because Hillary Clinton didn’t go to jail for her own email scandal, which Trump obviously ate up. There was Scooter Libby, who was convicted of perjury and obstruction of justice, a topic extremely close to the president’s heart. There was Sheriff Joe Arpaio, who the Department of Justice said oversaw “the worst pattern of racial profiling by a law enforcement agency in U.S. history,” which, y’know. And of course, there was millionaire Conrad Black, who was convicted in 2007 of obstruction of justice and fraud. Black received his own pardon from Trump after writing a book last year called Donald J. Trump: A President Like No Other, in which Black argued that “the great majority of anti-Trump activity in the first year of his administration was devoted to falsehoods,” and that Trump is not “a racist, sexist, warmonger, hothead, promoter of violence, or a foreign or domestic economic warrior.”