As for Ms. Gold and Mr. Pavlus, they married in 2009 and have two children. Their relationship is strong, but they had to figure out some ground rules concerning food early on. When he questioned something she ate, even if it was a simple, “Are you O.K. with that?” she bristled.

“It was like, ouch, you caught me!” she said. “Or, are you shaming me, as other people have shamed me in the past? Are you trying to be the food police?”

But the more they talked, the more comfortable she felt telling him what she really needed. “I said, ‘Thank you, I know you love me, but I can take care of myself. I have my therapist. You just need to trust me. Don’t watch me; be there for me. It’s not your job to help me not binge.’”

Her responses helped him to understand where she was coming from, and also put the onus squarely on her shoulders, and not his.

“I was never made to feel like it was my responsibility to police certain foods,” he said. “She asked for my support in sticking to the choices that she decided she needed to make. And, frankly, the ‘it’s not necessarily forever’ felt reassuring. I didn’t want to imagine us never groaning in delight together over pizza or a crazy dessert ever again, even though — of course — I’d be fine with it if that’s what it took.”

Ms. Gold still works on her relationship with her body and practices daily mindful eating. She has “slip-ups” a few times a year, when she might binge. Sometimes she shares this with her husband, but sometimes not.

Peanut butter is now allowed in the house and not only in Mr. Pavlus’s home office, along with sweets that aren’t hidden. It can still be fraught, especially when Mr. Pavlus is out of town and Ms. Gold is juggling work and solo parenting. During such stressful moments, “Something like marshmallows or chocolate chips just aren’t a great idea to have around,” she said. She doesn’t want to risk eating them, but wants her husband to be able to have them.

Ultimately, Mr. Pavlus said he liked being able to help support her in her recovery in this particular way. “Just recently she asked me to hide some marshmallows where she’d never find them, while I was away on a business trip,” said Mr. Pavlus. “I did it without a second thought, and with love.”