Elton John has joined George Clooney in calling for a boycott of nine Brunei-owned luxury hotels – including the Dorchester, London and the Beverly Hills hotel in Los Angeles – over the sultanate’s new anti-LGBT laws.

The law is horrific – Brunei is due to impose death by stoning as a punishment for gay sex, as well as adultery, from this week. As Clooney said, every time people use the hotels, “we are putting money directly into the pockets of men who choose to stone and whip to death their own citizens for being gay or accused of adultery”.

Whether or not to stay at the Dorchester is not a dilemma many of us face, but the problem of whether to avoid companies with questionable practices is a growing one. Amazon has been shunned by some shoppers over its tax avoidance, while Waterstones is now in the press for not paying staff a living wage.

Spending is not just about the product on offer but whom – and what – we are supporting. We might avoid that holiday in Dubai, due to the hidden slavery that built the luxury, or Topshop in light of its owner Philip Green’s harassment allegations. But unless we take ourselves to live off-grid in the mountains, we all have to navigate ethics within a capitalist and unjust system. I am aware of the human cost of making my smartphone, but I am not sure how I would do my job without one. There is also a certain amount of privilege involved here. Clooney will be welcome in any other hotel, but if you are on a low income, or if disability means you struggle to scour local shops, it is not so easy to avoid a site such as Amazon.

Still, withholding our business when we are able gives us the chance to flex our power. If “money talks”, we should think about what we are really saying when we spend it.