To celebrate (?) the end of the first hundred days of his presidency, Donald Trump sat down on Thursday for a wide-ranging interview with Reuters, because, as we all know, he really excels in this format. We learned that he is very mad about trade with South Korea and has no intention of getting on the horn with Taiwan again, but the interview's grimmest revelation is that whichever one of your co-workers had "a tad over three months" in your "When will Donald Trump start openly admitting that he never wanted this job?" office pool can go ahead and collect the cash. Read it and weep, and feel free to interpret that directive as literally as you like:

"I loved my previous life. I had so many things going," Trump told Reuters in an interview. "This is more work than in my previous life. I thought it would be easier."

Hang on just a sec.

[Furiously screams into pillow until no more sound comes out]

All right, where were we?

When the president leaves the White House, it is usually in a limousine or an SUV.

He said he missed being behind the wheel himself. "I like to drive," he said. "I can't drive any more."

Please, please, won't somebody think of the Phantom?

Many things about Trump have not changed from the wheeler-dealer executive and former celebrity reality show host who ran his empire from the 26th floor of Trump Tower in New York and worked the phones incessantly. He frequently turns to outside friends and former business colleagues for advice and positive reinforcement. Senior aides say they are resigned to it.

I genuinely can't decide if I want to know which former Celebrity Apprentice contestant he's able to get on the phone in the middle of the night to ask for advice on how to convince Kim Jong-un not to start a nuclear war, or whether I would prefer to embrace the ignorance-is-bliss approach and not permit that presumably very disheartening information to keep me awake at night.

Although it's fun to point out that the man almost made it 100 whole days in the White House before complaining about not having any fun, like a small child who wants to leave early from the expensive summer camp he begged his parents to send him to, Trump's position here is genuinely insulting to the voters who put him in office. Being president of the United States—and I can't believe I have to explain this—requires a commitment to a life of public service. The American people entrusted him with the enormous responsibility of leading this country for four years, and now that he's learned that the job he sought requires more of him than riding around on Air Force One and yelling about walls at rallies, he's wondering what exactly he got himself into. Donald Trump's presidential candidacy was always an ego trip, and now, even as it goes horribly awry, we're all along for the ride.

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