You make me sick, Brisbane. You egomaniacal, ingrate bastards. Patting yourselves on the back, taking all the credit for being Campbell Newman. Credit that rightly belongs to Campbell Newman.

You might have thought that you had something to do with being awesome and saving the city from storms and floods and things a few years back, but you’d be wrong. Campbell Newman did that. Not you or your stupid neighbour, or those bloody SES clowns who only wear these bright orange coveralls to draw attention to themselves, you know. Attention which, let's face it, should really be focused on Campbell Newman.

Campbell Newman - Premier, super hero and that-guy-we-wish-we-all-could-be . Credit:Glenn Hunt

Campbell Newman’s the guy who got us through the Brisbane floods and got people off roof tops and everything he did. When that supercell storm smashed The Gap to splinters and my mate Keith, a pensioner with the arse out of his pants and not a buck to his name got himself across the city to help out, he did that because he was Campbell Newman.

When tens of thousands of people turned up with shovels and buckets and whatever was needed to dig the city out of the mud after that last great flood, do you know who all those people were?