You know the old saying “There’s someone for everyone”? The essence of that sentiment is alive and well on Amazon Prime. The streaming service truly does have something for everybody. Not like, “We have Flight of The Conchords for comedy fans and the Mike Myers film The Love Guru for people who… have watched every other movie ever created,” I mean some truly bizarre selections. Earlier this week, we took a look at all the vintage Sex-Ed videos on Amazon. Now, we’re taking it a step further as we highlight a few more of the weird, wonderfully insane titles currently streaming on Prime Video.

Do you have a friend who loves Monopoly? They can watch a documentary about the classic board game. Do you know someone whose only issue with a Chris Kattan film is that there isn’t more Chris Kattan? Good news! The film Crazy Enough stars not one but two Chris Kattans. Classic airplane travel films, New Jersey tourism movies, 58 consecutive minutes of a vintage Mac computer displaying a crackling fire? Yep! They’re all a click away. One head-scratchingly odd click away.

If you think the above titles are weird, we’re just getting started. Join us as we dive into the eerie abyss of Amazon Prime.

There’s a 50/50 chance I’ve been brainwashed by Doggy TV. Since nobody has ever taken the time to brainwash me, which is both rude and insulting, I have to imagine this is what it feels like. Now to be fair, Doggy TV is a reality show for dogs, and I am not a dog. I am a boy. A man, really.

The two hour plus series begins with the catchiest dog barking jingle you’ll ever hear (somewhere The Baha Men weep) that, again, more than likely snuck some of that classic cult claptrap right into my brain. If I leave Decider and join Scientology next week, Doggy TV is almost certainly to blame. Or I just got bored.

The rest of the video is just dogs being dogs, minus a 20-minute break for “Doggy Nap Time,” which, honestly, more movies should implement. I’m much more likely to sit through Red Sparrow if I knew I’d have the opportunity to grab a quick nap.

What do dog enthusiasts think of Doggy TV? Three out of four weirdos with an abundance of free time love it!

So… I’m fairly certain this has mentally broken me. I can’t fully comprehend how I’m a human being, and the people who commented on this video are also human beings. The lesson? Being brainwashed isn’t a picnic. Oh, and don’t worry, cats, there’s also a video for you too.

Let’s move on to something a bit more normal.

Or not.

I understand these films are intended to warn young drivers about the perils of the road, but the narrator sure is a real wisenheimer about it. Despite the grim nature of the videos, the narrator is seemingly trying to perfect a tight five-minute set in the hopes of scoring an appearance on Johnny Carson as he jarringly cracks jokes while we witness gruesome footage of dead bodies.

No idea. Five to wildly inappropriate?

We’re also treated to a few narrative films in which a bunch of teenage rascals initially refuse to respect the road but eventually learn a valuable lesson about driver safety.

Just kidding. The films always end in death.

Nope. Not even remotely true, dummy.

Okay, now this I can get behind. Amazon has two separate videos featuring a zany array of vintage drive-in movie intermission ads. Also, these movies are for human beings, not dogs or cats, which I like. A true blast from the past, this collection of short ads includes brief videos imploring customers to visit the snack bar, advertisements for local businesses, and…

Stomach interviews?

During my illustrious career as a classically trained journalist, I’ve been fortunate enough to interview a plethora of high-profile stars and once almost spoke with Tyrese Gibson, so yeah, I’ve been around the block. But what would you possibly ask a stomach?

Right. That makes sense. Duh.

What’s-his-name? Do you mean Tony, stomach? Tony from Tony’s Pizza probably “discovered” Tony’s Pizza. Don’t big time the interviewer, bro. You’re starring in a regional drive-in movie ad. Plus, you’re a f*cking stomach, so dial back the attitude.

This collection of classic ads mostly features dancing food and upbeat jingles, but every once in a while they’ll throw you a curveball. A truly strange curveball.

Yeah! Don’t bring your problems to the drive-in, ya sinner! The drive-in is for teenagers looking to get passed second base and watching mediocre films you’re not super pumped about seeing but it’s Saturday night and you gotta do something.

If you’re looking for more quirky titles, you can also stream documentaries about bubblegum, toilets, the No. 2 pencil, concrete, station wagon enthusiasts, sex songs, and so much more on Prime Video.

Stream Drive-In Movie Ads on Prime Video