I haven’t been asked to lead any marches at Pride this year and, frankly, I doubt that’s ever likely to happen!

I’m still regarded by many in the gay community as an enemy and I understand that reaction. I have said and written things in the past that, while never intentionally hateful, caused offence and pain. This isn’t necessarily relevant, in that truth cannot change according to response, but I could and would not say such things any longer. I was wrong.

In the past six months I have been parachuted into clouds of new realization and empathy regarding gay issues, largely and ironically because of the angry and hateful responses of some people to my defence of persecuted gay men and women in Africa and Russia. I saw an aspect of the anti-gay movement that shocked me. This wasn’t reasonable opposition but a tainted monomania with no understanding of humanity and an obsession with sex rather than love.

I’m used to threats and abuse, and as someone who has just completed a book about Islam’s treatment of Christians and has campaigned for years for beleaguered Christians in the Muslim world, I am immune to verbal attacks and even death threats.

But this was different. I was accused of betraying my faith. Thing is, I have evolved my position on this issue not in spite of but precisely because of my Catholicism. My belief in God, Christ, the Eucharist, and Christian moral teaching are stronger than ever. Goodness, I am even trying to forgive those “Christians” who are trying to have my speeches cancelled and have devoted pages on their websites and blogs to my apparent disgrace.

The other attack is to argue that I have surrendered to pressure or that my children have influenced me. This is so absurd to be genuinely funny. My kids? They’re not political, they respect and love me and they would never waste their time trying to change my mind. That they’re accepting of gay people and gay marriage is axiomatic – they’re aged 16, 20, 24, and 25 -- and, whether you like it or not, that generation in the west simply does not comprehend opposition on these issues.

As for pressure, you clearly don’t know me. I have never compromised because of intimidation, even when it comes from genuinely violent and serious people. It’s tragic but indicative that there are critics who cannot come to terms with growth and change and, rather than consider what I have to say, try to question my motives.

No, I have evolved on this single subject because I can no longer hide behind comfortable banalities, have realized that love triumphs judgment, and know that the conversation between Christians and gays has to transform -- just as, to a large extent, the conversation between conservatives and gays has.

I am not prepared to throw around ugly terms like “sin” and “disordered” as if they were clumsy cudgels, or marginalize people and groups who often lead more moral lives than I do. I am sick and tired of defining the word of God by a single and not even particularly important subject.

If we live, we grow. The alternative is, of course, death.