Ok, sorry about that title. But I just drove 9 hours from a 90th birthday party and it’s all I could come up with.

I’m sure most of you know JJ’s down on the plaza. Maybe you know them from their massive wine list, their tasty apps or fond memories of their old location. For us, we haven’t been to JJ’s since the destruction of their original space.

But the other day we went there for happy hour and we now feel like bigger idiots than you already think we are.

Why?

Because it might just be the best damn happy hour in Kansas City.

Bold claim. But one I think we can back up.

First – let’s talk about the hours in which this happy hour takes place.

4-7 pm.

EVERY. DAY. OF THE WEEK.

Some of you may be all, “why is that a big deal?” but I imagine you are the blessed few that work in an area with bars and restaurants close by where you can make their happy hours no problem.

Me?

I work in a food desert. There is nothing of interest by my place of work. It is a forgotten land in a far off place. Thus, there is no possible way for me to make it to 90% of Kansas City’s happy hours. It’s just not possible. So finding out that there is one that goes to 7 pm is a huge deal for me. Huge.

Second – on Sunday they have half-off bottles of wine during happy hour.

Half-off bottles of wine 4-7 pm on Sundays. Look. That’s awesome. If you don’t think that’s awesome then you know something that I don’t know or we’re just not destined to be friends.

A note on the wine though. It’s half-off for bottles $50 and under. I wasn’t going to add this as I assume everyone that reads this blog is like us and just picks the cheapest or third cheapest bottle every time (we all know the second cheapest is a trap).

And third – the food is tasty and different and is a supremely great deal.

Let’s start with their happy hour pizza.

It’s only $5.

The picture doesn’t do it justice either. It was big and tasty. A nice size for only $5 that will fill up smaller people like Mrs. All the Yums. She could have just had this and a glass of wine and have been done. Worth noting is that the toppings change daily (at least we’re pretty sure). Me on the other hand? I’m destined to die by overeating so I got everything else.

Next up were the steamed mussels in a curry sauce. You get these bad boys for $8.

I never would have put mussels and curry together in my head but man, it works. From a flavor perspective these are the best thing on the happy hour menu. And a pretty damn good value too for how many they give you. Pro tip: Ask for extra bread to dip into the sauce. Our bartender Sean (who was amazing) hooked us up with that idea.

Next up – they’ve got meatballs for $3 a ball.

Sometimes you just need a meatball. I get it. I order side meatballs all the time. The tomato sauce is nice and clean and the meatball was dense and flavorful. Only issue I have is it should come with two for the same price. If you order two of these you’re at $6 and for $5 you could have gotten a full pizza that was awesome and better. Just our opinion.

There we tried the wild boar tacos. You get three of them for $6. They had a nice amount of flavor and a really nice spice level on the jicama pico de gallo. Order them if you want a little (not bad) burn. Don’t order them if you are spice adverse and weak and a huge disappointment to your father. We don’t have a photo of it because JJ’s has cozy dim lights and my photos turned out terrible. Forgive me.

Next, we tried their tenderloin sliders. You get two ground beef tenderloin burgers with chambord onion jam, gruyere and swiss cheese for $7. It was good, but it was obvious that it was there to appease the less adventurous of your friend group. Well priced. Well seasoned. Just not what we’d go for.

From there we tried a few things that are off the happy hour menu but are worth you trying out.

Paco Shrimp. Large shrimps stuffed with horseradish, wrapped in bacon and deep-fried. Yep. Get them. You need them. So so good. Buy them all. It is our understanding that these are JJ’s favorite dish.

We ended our Roman banquet with the lobster, shrimp and goat cheese purses.

To call these rich is a slap in the face to the Robber Barons of old. These were decadent. So much rich creamy flavor. It was very heavy though, so I wouldn’t recommend ending your meal with them. Start off with them so you can appreciate it.

And it wouldn’t be a true review without talking about the bathroom situation.

Brand new space means brand new bathrooms. Super clean. Two thumbs up.

JJ’s is a great space with lots of seating. It has amazing happy hour deals. There’s complimentary parking in the garage. There’s a great patio space when the weathers nice. And the bathrooms are super clean.

What more do you want, people?