Late-night hosts on Monday discussed the sexual harassment allegations against CBS chairman Les Moonves, Robert Mueller’s Russia investigation, and Rudy Giuliani’s evolving defense of Donald Trump.

Stephen Colbert: ‘The new CBS procedural: CSI: CEO’

“I heard there was an article about CBS chairman and man-I hope-isn’t-watching-tonight’s-monologue, Les Moonves,” began Stephen Colbert, who joked that the reporter behind the story, Ronan Farrow, told him all he needed to know.

“Ronan isn’t exactly known for his puff pieces about glamping,” said the host. “The CBS board met today and announced they’re in the process of hiring outside investigators. I don’t know why they’re outsourcing this: they could just use the cast of the new CBS procedural: CSI: CEO.”



Colbert went on: “There’s also, by the way, allegations against somebody I don’t work for, because last week we learned that Kimebrly Guilfoyle allegedly left Fox News amid accusations of sexual misconduct.”

According to sources, Colbert explained, Guilfoyle has been accused of showing personal photographs of male genitalia to colleagues and identifying whose genitals they were. “Which is horrible workplace behavior,” said the host, “and also the least popular edition of the board game Guess Who?”

“This story becomes way more interesting when you know Guilfoyle is currently dating presidential son and man-reacting-to-his-girlfriend’s-photo-collage Donald Trump Jr,” said Colbert. “Which means, and brace yourself for this, there’s a good chance Guilfoyle was forcing people to look at Don’s junior.”



Trevor Noah: ‘They should make him swear on his phone’

Comedy Central’s Trevor Noah discussed reports that Robert Mueller is looking at president Trump’s tweets in his ongoing obstruction of justice investigation.

“Late last week, it was reported that the Mueller investigation has entered a new phase,” began Noah. “Even though Mueller hasn’t been able to interview the president yet, last week he figured out how to do the next best thing.”

After showing news coverage about Mueller’s investigation into Trump’s tweets, Noah said: “I know some people are saying this is ridiculous, but remember: the president told us many times that @realdonaldtrump is the real Donald Trump.”

Mr. Mueller, you can stop combing through Trump’s Twitter feed now – we did the dirty work for you. Our book, “The Daily Show Presents: The Donald J. Trump Presidential Twitter Library,” is on sale now: https://t.co/6P4oKDNXo1 #DailyShowTrumpBook pic.twitter.com/IoXeWJOccs — The Daily Show (@TheDailyShow) July 31, 2018

The host then cut to videos of Trump saying Twitter is his way of “bypassing dishonest media” and getting his message out.

Noah joked: “When Mueller does finally get Trump into court, forget the Bible, they should make him swear on his phone.”



The host then briefly plugged The Daily Show’s own book, the Donald J Trump Presidential Twitter Library, an organized compilation of Trump’s tweets.

“Investigating Trump’s tweets for obstruction of justice is a good idea, but you don’t have to go on Twitter to do it,” said Noah. “Because we at The Daily Show have already combed through Trump’s tweets and we’ve come up with our own definitive analysis.”

“And it turns out,” Noah concluded, “Crooked Hillary and the FBI are the real Russians.”

Jimmy Kimmel: ‘When it comes to collusion he has been nothing if not consistent’

Meanwhile, ABC’s Jimmy Kimmel discussed Trump attorney Rudy Giuliani’s appearances on cable news, where he tore into Michael Cohen and argued collusion is not a crime.

He began: “The president lashed out at his former lawyer Michael Cohen, who made the potentially devastating claim last week that Trump had advance knowledge about the infamous meeting between his son and the Russians at Trump Tower.”

Kimmel then read aloud Trump’s tweet in which he slammed Cohen for retaining former Clinton attorney Lanny Davis as his lawyer.

“That is interesting,” said Kimmel, noting that Trump’s own defense team includes Emmet Flood, a former Clinton impeachment lawyer. “Who in this situation would hire one of Bill and crooked Hillary’s lawyers? Oh, wait a minute, you did!”



“Cohen must have something good because the president’s attack dog Rudy Giuliani was all over TV this weekend calling him a liar,” said the host, showing a clip of Giuliani claiming Cohen has “lied all his life” and is “an inherent, pathological liar.” Two months earlier in a television interview, Giuliani called Cohen an “honest, honorable lawyer.”



“I think Rudy Giuliani might have rabies,” Kimmel quipped.



“On top of all this, this morning on Fox, Rudy added a new twist, questioning whether collusion is even a crime,” Kimmel noted, before showing a clip fo Giuliani and Fox & Friends host Steve Doocy agreeing that collusion is not illegal.

“Say what you like about Rudy,” said Kimmel, “but when it comes to collusion he has been nothing if not consistent.”



The host went on to dig up past videos of Giuliani saying allegations of collusion are “fake news” and not supported by “a stitch of evidence.”

Kimmel concluded: “He’s gone from no one in the Trump campaign had any contact with Russians, to a few people might have met with some Russians but they talked about adoption, to, okay, they were talking about helping Trump win the election but they weren’t colluding to, even if they were colluding, not a crime.”