>I was only sixty-nine years old

>I loved NiP so much, I owned all the stickers and souvenirs

>I pray to NiP every night, thanking them for the M4A1 I have been given

>"NiP is love", I say, "NiP is life"

>/r/GlobalOffensive hears me and calls me a faggot

> They're obviously jealous of my devotion to NiP

>I called him a cheater

>They slap me and delete my steam account

>I am crying now, because my skins are gone

>I go into my bed and it is very cold

>I feel a warmth moving towards me

>I fell something touch me

>It's NiP

>I am so happy

>NiP whispers into my ear, "This is my AK"

>They grab me with their powerful clutching hands and put me on my hands and knees

>I'm ready

>I spread my nades for NiP

>NiP penetrates my killstreak

>It hurts so much, but I do it for NiP

>I can feel my money leaving, as my eco-weapons begin to arise

>I push against their force

>I want to please NiP

>NiP roars a mighty roar as they fill my inventory with their stickers

>LDLC walks in

>NiP looks him deep in his eyes and says, "It's all hacks now"

>NiP leaves through my window