The years after Proof died had probably been as bad for me as they were for Marshall. I was going through my years of college and it was kinda a f$#&ng nightmare. Back in the days I was quite an antisocial individual who was always avoiding crowds of people and any possible interactions with em. So for me, going to classes and sitting through them, making speeches in front of class…

Damn, I can’t even stress how bad that was… Before that, my only remedy would be music, rap music to be more specific. Whenever I felt sick to my stomach with what’s going on around me, I would put on an Eminem classic, then mix it with some Big L, Pac or Biggie. Then came something from Jay-Z, Rakim, The Game, XZibit, Lil Wayne, Royce da 5’9. Lyricism. Anything I get my hands on. My love for hip-hop goes beyond boundaries. And, as you can imagine, with Marshall as my favorite artist and one of the greatest lyricists alive, him disappearing from the radar… It was like losing my wingman or something. F%*k, it was like getting off my greatest drug, and not in a good sense.

Now let me take you on a trip down memory lane…

The Relapse

Paaam!! 2008… It’s officially true!! Album’s coming… Yeah, I know there have been rumors, but f&*k, I can’t explain what emotion I was going through… Shady’s baaackk!!! It’s about time I’ve heard something fresh from the lyrical grand master. I was anticipating this as if I was about to go through my own relapse, not on drugs, but on musical mushrooms… F&%k yeahhh!!! Bring it on!!

So crack a bottle, let your body waddle

Don’t act like a snobby model you just hit the lotto

Got one riding shotgun and no not one of ’em got clothes

Now where’s the rubbers? Who’s got the rubbers?

I notice there’s so many of ’em

And there’s really not that many of us.

and ladies love us and my posse’s kicking up dust.

It’s on till the break of dawn

And we’re starting this party from dusk

I was going round rocking the shits to this when it got leaked!

Back wit Andre, the giant, mister elephant tusk

Fix your musk, you’ll just be another one bit the dust

Just look at these sick patterns, maaan, Slim Shady back at his craft, yeaah! And Dre is also on the f&#%ing track… This is awesome!

And I take great pleasure in introducing: 50 Cent

You gotta be f&%#ing kidding me!! This solved all my problems at once. I was walking round hallways of the school like I was the f*&@ing boss. My wingman is back. It’s the greatest moment of my life. Well, at that point of time it really was. Don’t get me wrong, of course there was other music going on back then, and artists coming up with some crazy shit, but Shady helped me go through some tough times over the years… He was like my personal Vicodin pill, blowing away all the pain and leaving none behind. So this was quite a moment. This was my relapse.

Back by Popular Demand

“We Made You” for me was like another anthem. Forget the chorus, which in fact has such a melody that makes people wanna move to the music and dance, regardless of the lyrics. The song is a lyrical massacre of verses which remind you of how ill Eminem is with a pen and a pad.

You’re ready to tackle any task that is at hand

How does it feel: Is it fantastic, is it grand?

Well look at all the massive masses in the stands

Shady man, no, don’t massacre the fans

Damn, I think Kim Kardashian’s a man

She stomped him, just ’cause he asked to put his hands

On her massive gluteus maximus again

Squeeze it then squash it then pass it to a friend

Can he come back as nasty as he can?

Yes he can, can, don’t ask me this again

He does not mean to lesbian offend

But Lindsay, please come back to seein’ men

Samantha’s a two, you’re practically a ten

I know you want me girl, in fact I see ya grin

He is one of those rare MCs who could carry on the same pattern and rhyme scheme throughout the whole verse, or even the whole song, and cling rhymes together so masterfully, combining them with inner rhymes and alliteration… It just seems like he could go on with these multisyllable patterns forever, never taking a breath. It’s mind-blowing. This is exactly why I love him as an artist, his craft and dedication to it. And f&%#k it, I love how he plays around with these celebrities and their insecurities. Sometimes people just need to loosen up, and go Berzerk, ahahha.

I don’t really get why Marshall was unhappy with his work afterwards. Neither do I get people saying Relapse was a flop. I guess I could understand Eminem as an artist, always in search of ways to perfect and hone his craft. And he does so. With every record, he goes a bit further and evolves as an artist. This was also the case with Relapse. It was a whole different approach, a whole different sound and a great body of work. I embraced it and it helped me grow as a person. And that is why this really was a piece of art. Cause it spoke to me and helped me deal with my emotions. Looking back at it now, it was a wonderful time.

I think I need to prove my point here… So let’s move further down memory lane…

Waking Up to 3 A.M.

I wanna share a moment that I would rarely wanna even talk about. About a week after the “We Made You” video dropped, I had a really rough fight with my girl at the time, and afterwards we decided to split up. This hit me really hard, and I was hanging round at bars drinking my liver away for nights in a row. It eventually led me to a state of depression which was literally tearing me apart. Yeah, I was still feeding myself music to soothe the pain, but I guess I needed something really strong to drag myself outta this one.

And so I suddenly wake up one day, in the middle of the night… Somewhere from 1 to 3 AM, I guess, cause it was real quiet and dark outside, without a single vehicle passing by. F&$#k I didn’t even know what day it was. And of course I stopped following the Relapse promo campaign… I gave up on everything, didn’t talk to anybody, didn’t wanna listen. All I wanted was to drift away in my sleep.

But for some reason I couldn’t. Something was calling me. As if possessed by something otherworldly, I grabbed my laptop and got on ITunes to check out what was going on. And there it was, a single called “3 A.M.” so fit for my situation.

Wake up naked at McDonald’s with

Blood all over me, Dead bodies behind the counter, shit

Guess I must have just blacked out again

Not again! It’s 3 A.M. in the mornin’

Put my key in the door and

Bodies layin’ all over the floor and

I don’t remember how they got there

But I guess I must’ve killed ’em (killed ’em)

I don’t know what got into me but I’ve downloaded the song, then grabbed my keys and ran out of the house to my car. Everybody must’ve heard the tires burning when I pushed down the gas and started off like I was on a racing track. Thank God nobody was on the roads at that time. Normal people were sleeping. I put “3 A.M.” on the speakers to the max and drove around the city for hours. Just driving and listening. I bet most will think I’m f&%$ing insane but that was just the mind state I was in. Maybe it was my way of letting it all out. The song played on repeat and the lyrics spoke to me. After making like 30 something laps around the city, I’ve finally calmed down and drove back to my house. I felt a lot better, as if I let out all my emotions and the darkness that has been boiling up inside. That’s a short story of how a track saved my life.

People often say that Eminem fans are f&#$ing crazy. Maybe there is some truth in that. Whatever…

We’re in His Medicine Ball, Friends

I’ve always loved Eminem’s sense of humor. His puns and jokes are a masterpiece. Sharp as a dagger with a jagged edge, to the point. On this particular track he shows it all once again, magnified tenfold, with a kick-ass chorus. It goes from the jabs at celebrities,

All my West Side bitches throw it up

Put a balloon inside your pussy, queef and blow it up

Man I think that he just fell off the deep end, sure enough

So you better change the station to keep from throwing up Man you seen it all before you’re all too familiar with it

There’s a penis on the floor and two balls so you know who did it

You know you with it girl don’t front, oh no you didn’t I won’t rape all the Pussycat Dolls? Nicole you kidding? I’ll pee on Rihanna

See man I do what I wanna

Spray perfume in the sauna room

Crazy-gluing Madonna

To the La-Z-Boy sofa

Fold her in two then sit on her

Imagine a visual for that man

to the everlasting jokes about Christopher Reeves,

Eminem I’m coming to kill you

Always hated you and I still do

You’ll never fill my shoes

My Superman costume

Doesn’t even fit you they don’t feel you You’re taking this shit too far

Who d’you think you are?

Hang my suit up in the armoire

Every day I hate you more and more

Throw down the cardboard

Let’s break-dance if you think you’re hardcore

and it’s not just the jokes that stand out here. It’s the witty pattern Eminem is able to construct outta these namedrops and multisyllable rhymes. Plus the accents and voicing on this particular album. It’s f&#$ing genious. Not to mention the concept of us locked in Shady’s medicine ball. I just love his line of thought and the way he comes up with the craziest, disgusting, and at the same time hilarious shit to say on the record.

This is not just one track, the whole album is downright crazy, in a funny and entertaining way.

Favorite Track and Final Thoughts

One thing that I’ve always respected in Eminem was his nature and ability as a battle-rap MC. That’s where all the passion about the science of hip-hop comes from. Competitive spirit, inherent to hip-hop culture. The passion for complex syllable rhyme schemes and suspenseful content matter that surprises you the moment you hear it. All this is Eminem and more.

That is why my favorite track off the album is the one that holds the following lyrics:

Tell the critics I’m back and coming to spit it back in abundance

Hit a fag with onions and split a bag of fonions

Mad at me understandable, cannibal shoot an animal out of a cannon and have him catapult at an adult!

Captain of a cult, with an elite following to turn Halloween back into a trick or treat holiday

Have Micheal Myers looking like a liar, swipe his powers

Replace his knife with flowers and a stack of fliers

Hit Jason Vorhees with 40’s

Stuck a suppository up his ass and made him tell me a story

Gave Hannibal Lecter a fucking nectarine sat him in a fucking fruit and vegetable section and gave him a lecture

Walked up Elm street with a fucking wiffle bat drew fought Freddy Krueger and Edward Scissor Hands too

Came out with a little scratch, ooh

In “Underground” Slim Shady brings us back to the days of “The Hip Hop Shop” and the themes portrayed in his semiautobiographical starring movie “8 Mile”. These rhymes are spit in the way a battle MC would brag about his style and worldplay, killing the competition by putting himself on the pedestal. I just love the intensity and the content of the track, the way it is presented, the dark instrumental and chorus, the flow and Slim Shady’s rage mode.

So for the final thoughts on the album… Relapse brought Eminem back from the dark abyss. His music is his outlet and it is the way he deals with the bullshit going on in his life. As Marshall Mathers grows as a person and the emotions that prevail through that time period… Music is a time capsule for that. Every record is a new Eminem. And on this particular record it was a new Slim Shady. Rebuilt and remastered. Reborn straight from the ashes. He has dealt with his addiction, with his constant brawls with his ex-wife, with the death of his best friend Proof.

As for the critics, Marshall never makes music for them to applaud. He has used music as therapy throughout his career. And now, he is in a good place. As he said in one of his interviews, “There will never be a happy Eminem record, but there’s for sure gonna be records with Eminem being happy”. I think that time’s finally come. And Relapse is one of the things to thank for that.

His music also helped me, and many other devoted fans deal with personal issues. So, accents ran into the ground? I don’t think so. I still put on this record to reminisce of the times and just for pure enjoyment. Let’s celebrate 10 years of Relapse together! Rejoice!

P.S. Relapse has recently gone 2 times platinum in the UK. Thanks for the support, assholes!

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