Except, when you dig into the comics, you often find downright terrifying stories from the hero's past that actually explain a lot, yet will never get included in a Hollywood blockbuster. For instance ...

There's something to be said about the sacred nature of a superhero's origin story. Of all the things Hollywood has vowed to screw up through never-ending reboots and sequels and remakes, you can bet your lunch money that the hero's origin story is going to stay the same. Batman's always a rich kid who watched his parents die, Superman's an alien from Krypton and Wolverine's ... angry. In a world plagued with continuity problems, it's nice to have that kind of constant.

5 Spider-Man Was Molested as a Kid

The Origin Story We Know:

As a teenager, Peter Parker was bitten by a radioactive spider and gained incredible superpowers (instead of a nasty scab on his hand and/or cancer). After his Uncle Ben is murdered by a thug, Pete starts using his abilities to punch other thugs for the betterment of society.

Amazing Fantasy #15 (1962)

Not bad for a middle-aged accountant.

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But There Is Another Story ...

As perfectly logical as the above explanation sounds, there is a lesser known but arguably more important origin for Spider-Man. Basically, it boils down to "a guy touched his penis."

In a 1984 "very special" issue, Spider-Man comforts a young boy who was abused by his babysitter by telling him the story of another kid who was once in a similar situation. It all started when the kid in Spider-Man's story became friends with a creepy older boy named Skip.

Spider-Man and Power Pack #1 (1984)

"Wanna go out to eat? I get a discount at Sizzler."

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After going over his vintage porno collection together, Skip starts getting fresh with the other boy ... who happens to look remarkably like a young Peter Parker.