A woman in Norway is convinced she's a cat trapped in a human body, and she's taken to hissing at dogs and attempting to catch mice to make her case. "I was born in the wrong species," she says. This is all excellent news for anyone who's ever been accused of being a crazy cat lady, because now you can convincingly argue that there are animal people far, far crazier than you are. (She wears cat ears and a tail, OK? She says things like "I also love to sleep in the sink and in the windowsill" to people who have identified themselves as reporters and who are clearly going to share that quote with the world. Suddenly your habit of asking Mr. Muffin Fuzzypaws which cat food flavor he'd prefer for dinner seems downright sane, doesn't it? Now examine the selection of kitty photos at the top of this story and consider: If you were really a cat, which one would you like to be?)

Elsewhere in our cat coverage, we have this roundup of photos of cats on glass tables, photographed from below. Squeal at the cuteness of the kitty toes! And know that this doesn't make you a crazy cat person! Because you're not hissing at dogs and sleeping in the sink!

In New Zealand there's been an outbreak of people biting each other. As in, deeply enough to sever arteries. Which is actually kind of impressive, now that we think about it and eye our fellow TriMet passengers with fresh trepidation. The headline mentions the possibility of vampires, but given New Zealand's proximity to Australia, we wonder if it's more connected to them hearing about the Cat Lady getting in touch with their inner Australian Animal That Wants Humans Dead. (Really can't narrow it down any more than that, because as we all know, Australia = Deathtrap.)

In Denmark, which apparently felt Cat Lady in Norway wasn't doing enough to smear Scandinavia's generally stellar reputation for sanity, drunken teens got into a fight over Star Wars that required police intervention. The geeks among us would agree that certain topics - who's damaged the franchise more, Jar Jar Binks or the Ewoks? - would merit violence, but this particular battle was over the strength of the New Republic. (Seriously, that's worth going to jail over? That?) No one broke out lightsabers, but it looks like one of the kids got fined. Nice try, Scandinavia, but if you're trying to become the Florida of Europe, you're going to have to up your weirdness. By a lot.

There's some sort of football thing happening Sunday, but we recommend an alternative event: The Puppy Bowl. Or The Kitten Bowl. Both are vastly cuter. Also Super Bowl-themed and quite cute: these baby goats wearing Super Bowl sweaters. And if none of that pleases you, check out the baby goat video below. If that doesn't make you happy, there is no hope for you.

Violet Climbs a Rock HELLO WORLD!!! MY NAME IS VIOLET! Today was my first day in the BIG WORLD! I RAN and CLIMBED A ROCK! It was EXCITING...and SCARY...and oh HEY!!!!! WHERE'S MY MAMA?!! Posted by Kathy Stevens on Monday, February 1, 2016

Happy weekend! Watch out for people who bite!

-- Mary Mooney

mmooney@oregonian.com

503-412-7020; @MaryKnitsPDX