In This Phase of Crisis, Let’s Finally Kill the Bernie Bro Smear

Photo by Vidar Nordli-Mathisen on Unsplash

I didn’t always think that during the climax (or anti-climax) of the most important election in many lifetimes, I would feel the need to comment on what felt to me a vapid, baseless smear, but ‘Bernie Bro’ struck me as personal. I am cis-gendered, white and heterosexual and a fervent Bernie Sanders supporter. So there’s that.

There was also always something pernicious and familiar about it, too. I’m a survivor of childhood abuse and a counselor that specializes in trauma. I have worked with both survivors and educated abusers. I am rankled by gas-lighting and since the myth won’t die, allow me to recategorize it.

The topic of ‘Bernie Bro’ is a charged minefield. There is now an aggregate analysis that shows in the world of twitter social media nominal Bernie supporters are no more negative than any other political tribe. The point of the smear though is to draw out a different type of argument that plays out like quick sand for those who take the bait. I’m sure most feel as I did that it is not worth commentary. Tribalists living partly on Twitter and firmly in an opposing liberal political camp, could “prove” that Bernie Bro’s are a clear and present danger, by sharing horror stories of bullying, both publicly and in DM’s.

A counterpoint, from Bernie supporters may be to share their own horror stories of racism and sexism that comes from other camps. Bernie’s #notmeus movement has, at times, had the most diverse base, the most women, so the floating ‘Bernie Bro’ headline carries an additional charge of invisibilizing people of color and women generally.

If rhetorical victory means one-upping or invalidating the true pain of someone else, then you have found yourself in …not-the-best place. That’s the point. An effective smear, gets you fighting the wrong battle. ‘Gaslighting’ is a powerful abuse tactic, where the target is manipulated into mistrusting their senses. The victim of gaslighting may come to value the protection of their sanity by digging in and obsessing on proving their senses true or by accepting the overwhelming barrage and becoming quiet and complacent.

Smears are most dangerous when they imply an inversion of a truth. They hurt in a personal way. For example, making a good person believe they are bad or making someone strong and brave think they are weak and scared. Defeating these smears can become so important to their target, they can consume them. This is commonly referred to as “having issues.”

I believe I successfully overcame a similar smear to Bernie Bro. It took a couple decades. It took a lot of focus and concentration. And in the end, no one but me really cared, and I really wish I had not bothered. I wish I had just been able to believe that the person telling me lies was lying.

I had two abusers growing up. My father physically abused my mother until their divorce. My sister tormented me privately. She threatened my life and I knew then, that she meant it. I knew if I did not take my survival seriously, I might not make it. In that house, though, there was an understanding that there was nothing worse than being like my father. All men were misogynists like him until proven otherwise.

That meant I could not get angry. If my sister attacked me, I could not defend myself. The worst thing in that house and in my body, was to be like my father. So I had two choices. Take my hits, or make myself scarce.

My sister knew that calling me abusive was kryptonite. I bowed to it, weak and nauseous. And I needed to prove to her, to anyone I met, especially girls and young women I met as I grew, that I would not and could not hurt them. That I was not like “other guys.” I spoke in a higher pitch than my natural tone to show I was not frightening. I apologized frequently. I was excessively nice.

It took many years of therapy, Brazilian Jiu Jitsu as an outlet, and hard work, to learn that I was the only one that cared and I was the only person I needed to prove something to. That colossal distraction came from my own insecurities and vulnerabilities that were weaponized against me by someone who wanted me to focus on anything other than my own self-defense. That’s how gaslighting works.

To really dismantle this abuse trope, let’s look to the origin. Gaslight (1944) is worth a watch. Paula Anton (played by Ingrid Bergman) is being intentionally driven insane by her new husband, Gregory Anton (Charles Boyer). Gregory is a cunning and vicious villain. He killed Paula’s aunt Alice to steal her family jewels, but was unable to find them. He married Paula who inherits Alice’s house so he can search the estate.

What makes Gregory particularly dangerous, is he redirects Paula’s righteous suspicion back on herself. He teaches her to question her own instincts and observations by utilizing “crazy-making” tactics. He challenges her narrative memory of events and he embarrasses her by giving her a gift of a brooch and later stealing it from her so she believes she lost it. He hides his own watch and a photo on the wall so he can accuse her of stealing them publicly.

Paula has two struggles before her. The immediate struggle becomes to discern what is true if she cannot trust her senses. She cannot move forward without answering the question of her sanity. The secondary struggle is the realization waiting for her that a thief and murderer is sharing her home and she must begin to make the decisions that a survivor makes.

The fatal diversion that gaslighting creates is that a rational audience member wants to plead with Paula to consider her survival first, trust her instincts, plan her escape and expose Gregory to the police. The tragedy for Paula is that she is not prepared for those steps and Gregory nearly kills her for it.

At the film’s climax, Inspector Brian Cameron (Joseph Cotten) has discovered Gregory’s plot. The inspector sneaks into Paula’s home and tells Paula everything and breaks into Gregory’s desk to show her proof that he has hidden things that he accused her of stealing. The inspector must leave before Gregory returns home to discover him.

In this phase of the story, Paula finally is offered an answer. She must trust her suspicions once again. She must take hold of this knowledge and plan her next steps, but she is not able to, even at this crucial juncture. Gregory returns home and is in a rage at his desk being broken into. Paula reveals that she was told everything by the inspector and Gregory reflexively returns to crazy-making tactics, convincing her that the inspector was never real.

Fortunately, Paula is rescued by the return of the Inspector who defeats and arrests Gregory, but what if he hadn’t? Paula is so focused on making the case to herself and to Gregory that she is not insane, her blind-spot in this moment is the shared blind-spot that all gaslit survivors are susceptible to. In the struggle to answer the question of sanity and reality, survivors are in danger of losing sight of the important realization that the villains who challenge their senses are bad-faith actors.

So what is the truth? Bad faith actors know the same truth that survivors and heroes know in their hearts. Gregory knows that the greatest threat to his plans are Paula. A smart, observant, and experienced survivor who would be inclined to rightful suspicion. My sister knew that I was clear-eyed, good and even strong. So she turned my attention, goodness and strength inward. And the originators of the Bernie Bro smear knew a very important, very dangerous truth, that we need to relearn rapidly in this moment, because it is the truth that will allow this movement to be successful.

Five years ago, Bernie Sanders began his first run for president with a clarion call for political revolution. And across the country and the world, hopeful, determined and strong good-hearted supporters like myself, lifted their cowed heads and recognized they were not alone in hearing this call. This historic moment was as profound a challenge to imperial hegemonic propaganda as the invention of the internet.

This call to action was heard by a slowly-awakening, fledgling left and was heard by oligarchs and media protectors, most threatened by a coalescing movement-building. Whether the young left knows it now or not, the trumpet call began a race towards action. It necessitates a mirror coalescing of the ownership class.

That ownership class is much like Gregory and my sister and all gaslighters. It is clever and calculates that their younger opponent is filled with self-doubt and unaware of their own strength. So they begin a campaign to direct attention inward. The owners accuse the young movement and keep them defensive and squabbling internally, turning on strong voices, turning on and questioning their own strength.

Today, the years of movement self-doubt and attempting to prove to our opponents and ourselves the original truth of our own goodness and power, have successfully distracted us from embracing those truths. And as we sit in isolation and social distancing, it is a moment of quietude and reflection where we come back to ourselves.

Bernie’s 2020 campaign for president is stalling out and losing direction and momentum as its path to nomination becomes increasingly faraway and unlikely. This electoral crisis compounds with the Coronavirus pandemic converging with an economic recession/depression. We are in unpredictable and unprecedented moments where the threats are legion against people everywhere and a just, habitable future is in question.

The issue of ‘Bernie Bro’ seems smaller than ever now. I interrogate it, only to finally shrug it off, to bring us back to our most important truth. We, the left, are not alone. We are strong. We are determined. We are survivors and we terrify the owners with good reason. This phase of new crises will make the social infrastructure fluid, and there will come moments of opportunity through the struggle we are enduring.

So while we have lost our sense of unified direction, we will need to hold tight to our strength. Whatever comes next, we will need to be together. We will need to be good. We will have to be ready. The call to action will come again and pierce the fog. Our better world and future depends on our growth, maturity and readiness. During the climax of struggle, we must not fall for the same lies. We must know who we are and trust our sense of justice and maintain the bold platform we demand.