So I was gonna stream a GDQ recap but I feel like I should say this first.

Going to GDQ was a decision that I was initially hesitant to make, notably because of my behavior in previous years, and causing drama for no reason.

Turns out this year was no different. While the time I spent there was good, and I greatly enjoyed it, I hurt quite a few people in the process. I'll break it down for you.

First, there was night 0. Saturday night. Everyone was in on of the party rooms having fun and so was I. Turns out one of the people there (I will not reveal their name) got so drunk that they collapsed on the ground, and was unable to move. Me and that person were talking in private before they fainted. Several of us, including Stiv, myself, and Seadan (Cristin) volunteered to escort them back to their hotel room, which was in a hotel across the street. We ended up taking an Uber there, and before we left, they puked 3 times in the uber. We were finally able to get them back to their hotel room, but we needed to take another uber back. We jokingly called ourselves the "Throwup squad" and went back to the hotel. Shortly after we wnt our separate ways, I took it upon myself to tweet out what had happened. Bad move.

While I kept the person who got blackout drunk's identity a secret, I ended up tagging both Seadan and Stiv in the tweet. That's where the first bit of trouble started. Because after some people on reddit saw that tweet, they immediately assumed Stiv was the one that got them drunk in the first place, trying to make a call back to the incident in 2014. And then he started getting harassed for it...

It wasnt till the following day that I got a DM fro one of his friends saying to delete the tweet. Which I did, immediately. While I didnt think there was any harm in what I did, there was great harm to Stiv, who, for the second year in a row, I created drama for.

Fast forward to a few days later, when my friend Sam (somegirlzer0) was there for a party. We sat near each other and talked, and then after that, I dont really remember much of what happened before I laid down in one of their beds in an attempt to sober myself. Well as it turns out, I ended up wrestling someone to the floor because they were trying to talk to her. And after that, she hadnt come to the party since. I also have not heard from her since the middle of the week.

Then came my birthday, which was really fun and I had a lot of people there, but someone was missing. Mike, aka Fanatic. He was in charge of the party, but during the course of the party, he was not there. He did however, despite all the drama I caused him, get me a cake. After that, I hardly saw him, Stiv or Sam the rest of the week. And at the time I didnt know why. Now I do.

Mike has been nothing but a good friend to me, and every time I have thrown it back in his face. I caused drama not once but twice for Stiv, one of his best friends and mine, I embarrassed the shit out of Sam, also his best friend and mine. And despite me dragging him through the dirt, he still ended up getting a cake for me. It is with the realization of what I had done, along with the things that were just explained to me, that I feel it is for the best if I no longer attend another GDQ. People go there to have fun and enjoy themselves, not to deal with drama. Which is what I always seem to bring with me. I refuse to let this happen again, and if I cant control myself enough to not cause drama for people, then I should not be permitted to go. I feel terrible that I have done so much to cause so much. But I feel like this is how it has to be. I want people to be happy. And if this is the best way I can make them happy, by not going and allowing shit like this to happen, then so be it. I will not forgive myself for any of this.

I would also like to add my heartfelt apology to those I have hurt this past week. To those that just wanted a nice week with no drama. And especially to Fanatic, Stiv, and Sam, I am incredibly sorry and I hope that me being absent from GDQs from now on will at least in some way make up for what I did. In addition to this, I invite those that do not want me or my drama giving them issues anymore to block me on twitter, on twitch, and on discord.