Interviewed: SCP-3275-2

Interviewer: Dr. Ganz

Foreword: Interview conducted on ██-██-████, date of Foundation personnel's first in-person contact with SCP-3275-2.

<Begin Log, 15:40:38>

Dr. Ganz: Alright, I know we introduced ourselves to one another right before this, but I need you to state your name for the record, please.

SCP-3275-2: Oh, uh… right, ██████.

Dr. Ganz: Last name too, please.

SCP-3275-2: Oh, shit, I didn't know I had to, man, sorry. It's ████████.

Dr. Ganz: Thank you. So, you know what this interview is about, right?

SCP-3275-2: Man, me and those fucking pizzas, man. It's shitty for me too, honestly. Though I don't really get why this all is necessary, no. Like, what are you, like a cop? This feels like I'm really, like, being detained or something.

Dr. Ganz: Right now we really just need you to answer some questions. You're not currently being accused of anything.

SCP-3275-2: Alright, 'cause I swear dude, I'm not messing with the pizzas. I swear. It's like I'm being, like, sabotaged or something. I don't think I've gotten a single one right.

Dr. Ganz: Not one? Since the first day you worked there?

SCP-3275-2: Not a single fucking one. And this just happens to me, 'cause like, I asked my colleague ███, and he's had, like, no problems like this. No one else that I asked did. Is someone out to frame me for something? Again, I don't really know what this, like, place is, but you gotta find a way to fix this, man. Why does this only happen to me?

Dr. Ganz: Right, so you have no idea what causes this, correct?

SCP-3275-2: I swear, my man, I don't. This thing, like, only happens when I deliver on the job. If I, like, pass my friend a box of chocolates, the chocolates don't change, know what I mean? Because he didn't order them. Though I don't know if it would happen with chocolates at all. I've only ever done pizza delivery.

Dr. Ganz: So it's pizza delivery specifically that seems to be the problem here. Is there anything odd about this job in particular then? Anything that stands out to you in your memory that could be of relevance?

SCP-3275-2: Nothing, man. This is the most, like, basic job ever. In fact, it being so fucking low-tier is why my mom hated it.

Dr. Ganz: You're using past tense. About your mom.

SCP-3275-2: Yeah, she passed away right before I started on my first day at this job.

Dr. Ganz: I'm sorry to hear that. She hated this job, you said?

SCP-3275-2: Well, it's like…she always thought I could do better, know what I mean? That I'm 'underperforming' by getting a job like this. That I, like, should aim higher or something. Thing is, I'm an adult, you know? I can make the choices about my own life. I'm not, like, living the dream or anything, but I could be happy where I'm at. But my mom used to tell me that, like, I should always be looking for what more I can do and stuff. How to, like, keep getting better.

Dr. Ganz: Did your mom mean a lot to you?

SCP-3275-2: She did…and like, I'm really sad that she's gone, it's just…she was just so on my back all the time, you know? '██████, clean this. ██████, fix that. ██████, go run some more errands.' Like there was always something else I had to do. Always more to worry about. Couldn't catch a break ever.

Dr. Ganz: You lived with your mom then, seeing as she told you when to clean up?

SCP-3275-2: I did. Judge all you want, but like, I've just always been short on cash. That's why I have to even have this shitty job in the first place. And I can't even get that right. Finding the job was hard enough but now this? And I've still got, like, bills and stuff.

Dr. Ganz: Alright, that will be all then. Thank you.

SCP-3275-2: No, wait, I have, like, a ton of things to ask about this, man. Is it really true that you're paying my boss to not fire me?

Dr. Ganz: We can discuss further questions off-record.

<End Log, 15:43:21>