The United States Department of David Danzig

Welcome to www.creamy.com!

The United States Department of David Danzig is celebrating its eleventh year online! Created in 1994, this page was one of the first sites on the World Wide Web!

NEW!

This is THE thing to do on this page; it's the reason you were sent here. This month (or so)'s tale is Mr. Jones, The School Teacher Mad With Power:

A comedy sketch I wrote about a teacher who is king of his little world. Maybe you had this teacher, too!

And don't forget to check out the past Stories of the Month (Or So):

The first and probably the sickest! The Hunters: a tragicomical allegory about a hunting trip that could never really happen--OR COULD IT?

Amazing Secret: it could have come straight out of The Weekly World News: an ad parody for the lowest common denominator.

Letter to the Quality Bus Company: One of the true masterpieces of sarcasm of our generation.

What Is Real: A poem, rich with surreal imagery, about chosing between different ways of parsing reality.

Page 217: A college essay that worked!

The Dream: This is an actual dream that I had recently. It is surprisingly cogent, yet disturbingly violent and bizarre; I am at a loss to explain it. You can now also read an interpretation of this dream, submitted by Karla Jameson.

The Andrew Letters: This is some very strange surrealistic correspondence, which is only very vaguely sexual.

Magnetic Poetry: At last, some more surreal poetry (perhaps my favorite medium)! These two, very short, poems were written using the commercially available "magnetic poetry kit."

The Volk Correspondence: A tale of Political Correctness going to far-- or not far enough? You decide!

Top Ten Medical Disorders or Political Movements: My very own top ten list! (With apologies to David Letterman.)

The Nightmare: A frightening and disturbing and cinematic nightmare I had recently. This one's not for the weak of heart!

Who Am I?

My name is David Danzig. I've recently graduated from law school at Duke University, in Durham, North Carolina. I have just moved Midtown Manhattan in New York City. While I lived in North Carolina, I was one of the 708 Parker people. Other residents of 708 Parker Street, in the time I have lived here are Ali, B, Brian, Heather, Dav, Andrea, Ele, Paul, Robin, David, Jeff, Amelia, and Darren. There were never more than six of us living there at any one time, though.

I'm a member of The Duke Journal of Gender Law and Policy, The National Organization for Women, The American Civil Liberties Union, The Lambda Legal Defense and Education Fund, The Sierra Club, Greenpeace, and Amnesty International. I'm registered a Democrat, but I probably have more Libertarian leanings. I was a vegetarian for four years, but have recently fallen off the wagon.

This site is constantly growing and changing, so please come by often.

Take a look at my hotlist.

Take care,

--David

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