Federal Open Market Committee meetings entail central bankers going around a table discussing their views about the economy. They also include numerous jokes and attempted jokes, many from economists who have a unique sense of humor. Transcripts of the meetings mark such moments with a simple tag: [Laughter].

Here’s a sampling of jokes from the 2005 transcripts, released today with the customary five-year lag with updates to come:

Alan Greenspan, March 22, 2005, in an exchange with Dino Kos, then head of the New York Fed’s markets desk.

MR. KOS. As some of you know, Greece issued a 30-year bond recently at 26 basis points above the rate on Bunds, or about ½ point below the U.S. 10-year rate and about 100 basis points below the 30-year rate.

CHAIRMAN GREENSPAN. Can we borrow from the Greeks? [Laughter]

MR. KOS. It’s interesting, since they are at about double the 3 percent (borrowing) limit. So the markets are not punishing anybody for not complying.

Edward Gramlich, lamenting fiscal laxity, March 22, 2005

In recent meetings, I have held out one factor that could get me to be less hawkish—the prospect of real fiscal tightening. This has become less likely, too. There has been a dispute between those who want to cut spending and extend the tax cuts and those who want to maintain spending. When not dealing with steroids in baseball and feeding tubes in Florida, the Congress seems to be working toward one of their unique compromises: Let’s extend the tax cuts and maintain spending. [Laughter] There just doesn’t seem to be much voice for and hope for real fiscal tightening.

David Stockton, March 22, 2005 and Dec. 13, 2005, economist and Fed funnyman

–I offer one more piece of evidence that I think almost surely suggests that the end is near in this sector. While channel surfing the other night, to the annoyance of my otherwise very patient wife, I came across a new television series on the Discovery Channel entitled “Flip That House.” [Laughter] As far as I could tell, the gist of the show was that with some spackling, a few strategically placed azaleas, and access to a bank, you too could tap into the great real estate wealth machine. It was enough to put even the most ardent believer in market efficiency into existential crisis. [Laughter]

–So what should we worrying about? While my colleagues who attend our lengthy forecast meetings were not exactly thrilled by it, the removal of my arm from its sling in the past few weeks has allowed me, once again, to bring my principal value added to the forecasting process, and that is copious amounts of hand-wringing. [Laughter]

–Our calibrated vintage capital models failed us, and clearly finger-crossing has not proven a terribly robust forecasting technique. We even tried an approach gently suggested to us by Governor Olson at the time of our last forecast—you know, had we thought about trying common sense? [Laughter] We tried, but even that didn’t seem to work.

Vincent Reinhart, Feb. 1-2, 2005, Director of Monetary Affairs

Over the intermeeting period, I surveyed you about whether the summary of your economic projections should be expedited—that is, released next week rather than three weeks later when the Chairman delivers the Monetary Policy Report in testimony to the Congress. My experience in surveying you has been that if I ask the 19 of you “What is the color of an orange?” I couldn’t be sure of getting a majority on a single answer. [Laughter] This most recent survey was no exception. Almost as many of you strongly endorsed an expedited release of your projections as strongly opposed it. An equal number of you endorsed it as opposed it, and there were two lonely people who were indifferent. [Laughter]



Alan Greenspan teasing Tim Geithner, then New York Fed President, March 22, 2005

VICE CHAIRMAN GEITHNER. I have no humor in my statement and nothing that differs from the consensus.

CHAIRMAN GREENSPAN. Your straightforward remarks are very humorous. [Laughter]

VICE CHAIRMAN GEITHNER. Careful. [Laughter]

More after the jump