TRACEY BENDINGER | Culture | Contact

For four-weeks a Betoota Dolphin’s prop had been following the Wallabies around Japan for the Rugby World Cup.

And while any normal person with two eyes would have taken in some of the spectacular sites in the land of the rising sun, Dillan Brooke has returned home with nothing to report.

The revelation came after Brooke’s mother, who picked him up from the airport, asked the prop what his favourite landmark was.

“Fuck, I didn’t know what to say” he said to The Advocate,

“Everything looks pretty similar through the bottom of a beer”

“And let me tell you, with that Japanese craftsmanship you can’t see shit out of the bottom of those frosted beer”

Having to think quickly on his feet, Dillan says that he remembered overhearing someone mention “bonsai trees and sand gardens – whatever they were.”

“She seemed to buy it” he said to our reporter.

“She went to Japan a couple years ago, so she just kept asking me if I’d seen all the shit she saw”

“We had very, very different experiences in Japan”

“I just had to shut the conversation down as quickly as possible.”

It’s believed Dillan successfully changed the direction of the conversation by asking his mum about how her golf game is coming along.

More to come.