rupi kaur

My dear ladies and gentlemen… and everybody else here not sitting on a cushion! I have just about HAD. IT. with the argument that body positivity encourages unhealthy lifestyles. It’s just dressed up fat shaming, discrimination, and hatred towards the overweight population, and it has-ta staaahp.

Until relatively recently, I had only thought that people who hated on fat/overweight people were, well, the straight up haters. But I have since realized that there are people out there spouting hurtful NONSENSE about weight… and not only that. These people think they’re being helpful.

Personally, I’ve been all about the body positivity thing for about 5 years now. Ever since getting out of eating disorder treatment, I’ve wanted fewer people to talk or worry about their bodies or be on damaging (AKA any) diets. I’ve wanted people to stop fat shaming (especially themselves!). I’ve wanted people to wear whatever the fuck they want. I’ve wanted people to stop moralizing the act of eating. And I’ve been so down for more diverse body representation in the media. Shows. Films. Social media. Music videos. Magazines. Cave paintings. Whatever!

And it’s happening! Slowly… but surely. There are more Instagram accounts now than ever dedicated to showing a variety of bodies and celebrating their different shapes. My personal favorite is Megan, an anorexia survivor:

ah, to have her moooooves!

She highlights her own beautifully imperfect body as well as others: bigger and smaller. She calls out b.s. She talks about her own experiences challenging body image standards, especially those designed for women.

Of course there are still some hiccups with the portrayal of these bodies…

But this generally inclusive reality sounds idyllic, no? It sounds like a lovely place where we are actively showing our acceptance and appreciation for all types of people. Ridding the world of just a little bit of shame and violence that we can all do without.

HOWEVER… there are people out there who think that the body positivity movement is… get this… DANGEROUS. Dun dun DUUUUUUUNNNnnnnn

These *takes a deep breath* of course well-meaning people believe that body positivity leads to “normalizing obesity” which then ultimately leads to poor lifestyle choices. So basically if we show more fat people, more people are going to want to be fat…

Crickets. Dead stare. Are you fucking kidding me?!?

Oh, loves. I barely know where to begin with this. I’m gonna start with the sexy stuff and then end with some fun fat facts. fafacts!

First off let’s think about the rationale that showing more overweight and obese people will lead to there being, well, more overweight and obese people.

Let me begin by acknowledging that obesity is a super complex issue. Environment, socioeconomic status, genetics, lifestyle, and psychology all contribute, but let’s just stick with media representation for now.

WE STRAIGHT UP GOT TO THIS POINT WITH THE MEDIA REPRESENTATION THAT WE HAVE HAD FOR DECADES

Roles are only just now being given to differently-bodied people (of all genders but specifically women… it’s always been okay-er to be fat and male than fat and anything else). So we’ve gotten to this point of obesity by having the slender/buff body ideals celebrated, lauded, and revered.

The media has been conveying the message that these are the only people who deserve happiness, success, love, respect, and most importantly, our time/money/attention. These skinny minnies are the ones who matter. While the fat character is the comic relief. The unfortunate friend. The villain. Or even worse, absent. Fat = bad. Bad, fat, BAD!

As much as the illustrious Nicole Arbour might say it isn’t, fat shaming IS (of course) A THING. Weight discrimination IS (still federally legally) A THING.

Now, if you’re as up to date as I am with your obesity-related psychological studies *brushes shoulders off*, you’ll remember studies and articles coming out over the past 10 years or so showing that fat shaming doesn’t help people lose weight/adopt “healthier” lifestyles. In FACT — it tends to have the opposite effect.

This totally makes sense, though, right?! Being told over and over again by the media, friends, acquaintances, and strangers that you’re a “fat fuck,” wouldn’t make me want to treat my body well, even if I wanted to. It, along with myself, is already something that has been deemed worthless. And when I don’t feel great about myself, my energy gets zapped. I don’t want to move. I don’t want to eat what makes my body feel good. Just give me Netflix, one pint of peanut butter pretzel gelato, and one pint of chocolate. And maybe a spoon…

The worst part is that overweight/obese people can’t even rely on those who are supposed to help them get/remain healthy. Medical professionals who specialize in obese care and research don’t even treat this population with respect! The majority at one obesity-related conference, for example, rated the obese as more lazy, stupid, and worthless than thin people. That means that, at least from this sampling, people studying obesity are already strongly biased.

Can we also just take a moment and look at the trends in growth of the diet industry in conjunction with the rise of obesity?! (Not to mention the rise of eating disorders, but again… another post…) As one has grown, so has the other.

“Ahhhh!” you wise and logical person might be saying to yourself, “Of course this is the case because cause and demand! The diet industry is just trying to help! They’re filling a need!” Blah, blah, blah, blah…

But the diet industry is, of course… an INDUSTRY. It wants to continue growing. So what does it bank its profits and growth on? The fact that your diet will fail. And fail. And fail. And fail again. Notice I didn’t say YOU will fail. It’s such a perfect scam because the shame is all put on the customer. The customer is always wrong.

It’s all their fault that they weren’t able to lose enough weight or couldn’t keep it off. It’s definitely not our approach/product! That tub-o-lard just doesn’t have the WILL POWER.

That’s like saying that it’s your fault when your brand new car keeps breaking down. Guess ya should have tried harder!

Oh geez… okay. Rein it in, Rachel.

had to go to my happy place for a minute

Back to my point: having only skinny/“physically fit” people represented in the media hasn’t had the “desired” effect that these “anti-normalizing obesity” people “purport” they “want.”

Also, SNEAK FACT ATTACK: it’s actually been shown that being overweight is healthier than being underweight. And if you take a look at the images/messages being shown out there, pretty much all of the women are under “healthy” weight for their height. But I don’t hear (as many) people shaming the shit out of these (still real!) women. (No one should be shaming them, just to be clear!)

Their bodies are okay because I have been taught that they are pleasing, so it doesn’t upset me or make me uncomfortable. Well maybe the reason that you’re uncomfortable when you look at more diverse body types, PAL, is because of the insufficient representation of these in the media. If you don’t see something very often, it could very well make you uncomfortable when you see it every once in awhile. Especially if you’ve been programmed to find that something repulsive.

Okay… now I’m going to get into some controversial shit. So hold on to your crackerjacks, people. Because I’m gonna say it. Don’t try to stop me! It’s gonna come out one way or another. Oh shit, oh shiiiiiit:

BEING FAT DOESN’T MEAN YOU’RE UNHEALTHY

… in fact sometimes? It means you’re healthier.

That’s right, friends. Being fat or overweight isn’t the sensationalized death sentence we’ve come to know it as. It’s been shown that overweight/obese people are just about as healthy as their “normal” counterparts. And if these overweight/obese people exercise, they are healthier than their sedentary skinny friends, even if the exercise doesn’t ever lead to weight loss.

The “Obesity Epidemic” is infamously blamed for several scary diseases, but it’s not actually clear that obesity is always the cause (few exceptions being osteoarthritis, sleep apnea, and maybe a few cancers).

Sure, the weight thing might be associated with these illnesses but causation, on the other hand isn’t as clear-cut. For instance, it’s generally accepted that the risk of type 2 diabetes comes from genetics, but there is also strong evidence to support the idea that these genes also cause weight gain. In fact, there are even several diseases where high levels of body fat provide an advantage.

What I believe is a real result from not having larger body diversity in media could be producing exactly what the “anti-normalize obesity” people want to avoid. For instance, we all know that stress is dangerous to our health. It contributes to hypertension, diabetes, coronary heart disease, among other unpleasant things. And guess what can be really stressful in our society?! Ya got it! Being overweight! Cross-cultural studies actually suggest that overweight/obese people in countries where there is less stigma around weight don’t have the same risk of diseases. Fat shaming could be making people ill!

However, if we’ve done our job well enough and shamed those fat people into dieting (which is a bullshit practice, btw), statistically-speaking they have probably tried more dangerous methods for weight loss or at the very least gone through weight-cycling. This process of losing weight and gaining it back (and losing and gaining and losing) is actually more harmful to one’s health than just remaining obese.

Are you starting to get my point? Understanding my frustration?

Let me propose something to you, all of you beautiful, remarkable yous out there. I believe that everyone is worth their spot in this world. Everyone deserves to be seen. So let’s embrace — figuratively and (consensually) literally — a larger variety of bodies, filling a larger variety of roles. Let’s have more plus-sized models. More diversity within that “plus-sized” world! More overweight actors/actresses! More fat cats!

And especially, let’s have more messages showing people, especially the kids, out there that everyone’s body is okay just the way it is right now. Sure, it’s always good to make changes in your life to feel good and at home in your body. But people need to know that they don’t have to change who they are in order to be happy and be loved. They are perfect and so are you.

Keep being wonderful ❤

Thanks for reading. If you’d like to learn more about this kinda stuff and the approach to nutrition that I subscribe to, check out the following sources: