When it comes to masturbation, simple equals safe. But since variety is the spice of life, plenty of guys have decided to shake up their masturbation routines with exotic techniques or foreign objects. Spoiler alert: This usually does not end well.



Take, for example, the 27-year-old man who decided it would be fun to constrict the flow of blood to his penis—similar to what a penis ring is designed to do—by sliding a plastic bottle onto his Johnson. You can see where this is going.



The bottle became stuck, “strangling” his penis and causing distal edema—a rapid accumulation of blood in his shaft that caused it to swell to twice its usual erect girth, according to case report in the Indian Journal of Surgery.

Fortunately, this guy’s penis returned to normal size after doctors cut the bottle away. (They have no idea if the man suffered any long-term effects because they never heard from him again—presumably because he was too embarrassed to answer their follow-up calls.)



Here are a few other ways men have compromised the health of their manhood while masturbating. For safe ways to spice up solo sessions, try 5 Masturbation Secrets You Don't Know About.