Years ago

Shrek sit in chair. "Excuse, please! waiter drink for me" waiter nods but trips on shrek's shoe. "I AM SUE!" waiter shouts, angry! Whaaaaaat?! Drinks that were carried spill EVERYWHERW!

Waters fills store. Everyone die! Except shrek! Shrek cries, filling store further. He walks all over dead friends. Travesty

The police come to store. "shrek!" they shout. They try to kill him with fire but alas this live him. Shrek eat fire. RAAAAAARTGH! He burp fire and kill police. He crie more

Years that is now

Shrek is an old Shrek now. He is 2940 year old and is lonely. No one love him. He starts to do therapy.

"hello mr. Ogre sir my name is Barry bee" said the sexy therapist. Shrek gasp! He had never seen someone sexy before. His wee get hard

"uh sir you have a banana in your pocket" barry says. Shrek says "oh yes this is in fact a banana" they share the banana over toast and the new york times

"so tell me your problem sir shrek" barry says he spits a little banana on shrek because he was chewing with his mouth open (do not try this kids) but shrek don't mind he likes pre-chewed banaajnaha

"I kill dead eople" shrek whisper. Barry gasp!

Barry say my wife died year ago. He looks into distance

So you are single? Shrek is very hap!

Shrek say, that couch look comf. Barry agrees, yes comf. Do you wish to try! Shrek nod in an ogre way and sit on coch.

Barry sexy walks oveer and sits as well. He does the yawn nad puts arm around shrek. Shrek blushes!

Shrek says have you ever been with a man before. Barry says no. shrek says have you ever been with an ogre before. Barry says yes exclusively ogre

Shrek says are you nervous. Barry shoves tape on his mouth and buries his body behind his practice. Shrek lay there for many day he die. Barry is a killer! Barry also was the waiter! Barry's wife was all the police! He was getting back at shrek! But before shrek die they do 1 sex and then die. Barry gets pregnant and has to raise the kids with his secrtetary Belinda wh ois a cockroasch. They fall in love and get married but belinda is arrested for insurance fraud and the babies hate their dad. He jumps off a bridge in portland orgon and dies a sad life THE END