In an embarrassing moment for the EU, its final farewell to Britain today was unfortunately mistranslated as “So long, and thanks for all the fish”. In a hastily written apology, the Spanish delegate said they hadn’t meant to be quite so honest about their feelings, while the French delegate seemed surprised by the suggestion they weren’t allowed catch British fish any more.

The statement went on to describe Britain as ‘mostly harmless’, though this part was apparently written before Boris Johnson became PM. For his part, Johnson said that after years of preparation, the government had come up with a plan to make the UK a huge success after Brexit. Unfortunately, five minutes before this plan was due to be announced, Britain was demolished to make way for a Brussels to Dublin bypass.