And get up off the couch and do some fucking exercise.

There. That's two things. You can have them for free.

And they're not even weird.

You know what? This isn't rocket science. It's actually pretty simple. No matter what the ads say, you can't spot reduce belly fat. When you lose weight, you lose weight all over. When you tone up, you look leaner and stronger. Therefore, if you combine exercise and healthy eating (ladies, doing weights won't make you look like The Hulk - seriously, Google it), with a little time and effort that belly fat will disappear.

The Internet is full of amazing resources to help you with all of this.

Get on it. Exercise is pretty fun when you get used to it :-)