Manchester cops swooped on a city centre tram stop on Tuesday after a concerned woman reported a man sporting both Lycra cycling shorts and an erection, the Manchester Evening News reports.

In a nail-biting blow-by-blow account on Twitter, Greater Manchester Police first confirmed they were moving to investigate...

Call from female reporting a male in lycra cycling shorts with an erection at Piccadilly tram stop. Patrols on route to take a look..... — GMP City Centre (@GMPCityCentre) December 29, 2015

...then shortly after admitted the 50-something hardened sportsman had given them the slip:

No trace of any males in lycra shorts in Piccadilly, looks like he's cycled off. No offences reported by informant. — GMP City Centre (@GMPCityCentre) December 29, 2015

A GMP spokesman later admitted: "At no point was the male acting inappropriately and no other members of the public have reported any inappropriate behaviour."

The incident prompted interesting debate as to just how illegal a public stiffy is. According to GMP, it "depends what you do with it", and in this case the woman who called it in "was concerned he was being overly overt about it near young people".

Obviously, the matter of clothing, or the lack of it, is a key factor. What you certainly can't do is roll up at a naked bike ride with a public engorgement an expect to escape a stiff warning from cops. ®