SAN FRANCISCO — What do you get if you cross a beer geek with a science geek? Really good beers with really geeky names.

I’ve already proven the connection between beer and geologists, but the number of brews out there with awesomely geeky science names suggests that the beer-science link is even more primordial. After stumbling across a few of these, like Shale Ale (named for the Burgess Shale, a famously fossiliferous outcrop) and Homo Erectus (an IPA made by Walking Man Brewing), I decided the matter required further investigation.

With the help of my friends and Twitteronia, I tracked down a bunch more science-geek beers, and a few with super-geeky tech themes (this is Wired, after all). I managed to get seven of them into Wired HQ, because, let’s be honest, this was all just another elaborate excuse to make drinking beer part of my job.

Sadly, I couldn’t get my hands on some of the geekiest beers. A few were short runs for special occasions, like The Empire Strikes Back All-English IPA and Galileo’s Astronomical Ale (tagline: Theoretically the best beer in the universe), brewed by astronomy geek Ken Grossman of Sierra Nevada Brewing Company to celebrate the 400th anniversary of the telescope. And some are seasonal, like 21st Amendment’s Spring Tweet, a beer brewed for Twitter (which brings up the obvious question: Where’s Wired’s beer?)

Others are only available to lucky local geeks, like the beers from Atomic Ale Brewpub in Richland, Washington, including Plutonium Porter, Half-Life Hefeweizen, Oppenheimer Oatmeal Stout and Dysprosium Dunkelweisen.

The seven beers I did obtain came to Wired in the mail from breweries and friends, on a plane in my suitcase, and one was even hand-delivered right to our doorstep. I then gathered some of the other beer lovers at Wired, and we tasted the beers. Each brew was given two scores (out of 10 balls, just like everything else we review here): one for taste and one for the geekiness of its name. The highly scientific results, based on the combined score, continue on the following pages.

No. 1: Tricerahops Double IPA

Ninkasi Brewing, Eugene, Oregon

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How many aspiring geeks loved dinosaurs as kids? All of them. And how many of them still love dinosaurs? All of them. So it should come as no surprise that Ninkasi Brewery‘s Tricerahops Double IPA landed at the top of our list.

This beer is the descendant of Hopasaurus Rex, one of brewer Jamie Floyd’s creations at a previous stint at Steelhead Brewery. But unlike their paleontological namesakes, Tricerahops could totally take H. rex.

“It’s triple the hops and a double IPA, so it’s a big, dangerous beer,” said brewery spokesman James Book. “It’s definitely a monster.”

At 8.8 percent alcohol*, it really is a monster. And the Wired beer drinkers found the Tricerahops to be quite drinkable, which could have been trouble if our tasting supply had been unlimited. The beer certainly is a hoppy one, but the malt was also given a boost and balances the beer nicely and lends a subtle sweetness. Several of the reviewers commented on the staying power of the hoppy aftertaste, but couldn’t agree on whether this was a good thing or a bad thing.

All in all, the beer was a hit and “would be great with a steak,” according to Playbook writer Erik Malinowski. We love it when a great beer name is backed up be a great beer.

WIRED: It’s named after my favorite dinosaur and is one of the least stinky double IPAs we’ve encountered.

TIRED: Extinction by asteroid impact.

*All alcohol contents in these reviews are percent by volume (abv).

Image: Jonathan Snyder/Wired.com

No. 2: Pangaea Ale

Dogfish Head Brewery, Milton, Delaware

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This interesting brew is named after the supercontinent Pangea* which began breaking apart 175 million years ago, eventually forming our modern continents. And it’s not just the name that evokes plate tectonics, the beer itself has the same geological foundation: It contains ingredients from all seven continents that once made up Pangea. I mean, how awesomely geeky is that? (Full disclosure: I may be biased because I am a geologist.)

“We found a U.S. military base on Antarctica that uses reverse osmosis to turn iceberg water into drinking water,” said Dogfish Head Brewery founder and president, Sam Calagione. “And it turns out they were major beer geeks down there.”

Two 5-gallon buckets of Antarctic water go into each batch of the beer, brewed once a year in the fall. Calagione assured me they have done the calculations, and every bottle of Pangaea Ale will contain at least one molecule of Antarctic water. The beer also contains Muscavado sugar from Africa, Basmati rice from Asia, crystallized ginger from Australia, Belgian yeast to represent Europe, North American maize and South American quinoa.

“I thought it would be neat to bring the fractured world back together in liquid form,” Calagione told me over the phone from the airport on his way to Rome to brew beer using local rosemary. (Later this year he’ll be in Peru brewing with blue corn, and then New Zealand to brew beer that will be aged on local wood.)

The beer itself got a mixed review from the Wired staffers. It has a lot of different tastes packed into it, which can be either interesting or off putting, depending on the individual. It’s a 7-percent alcohol Belgian-style beer and definitely appealed more to fans of that corner of brewtopia. It was a bit too sweet and spicy for some who compared it to desserts like pumpkin pie, and some said the ginger was too strong. But others liked all the different tastes in there, and thought it had a nice finish and did a fine job of being what the label says it is: “A flavored malt beverage brewed with crystallized ginger.”

To be fair, as with many of the gadgets that come through the newsroom here, we opened it up and tried it out without reading the directions: “Best drunk cool not cold, from a snifter or a wine glass.” But everyone loved the idea, the theme, the label and the geekiness of Pangaea Ale. Product reviews editor Danny Dumas summed it up nicely: “If you’re a fan of full-bodied beers and plate tectonics, there really is no other choice.”

WIRED: It has ingredients from every continent (water from Antarctic icebergs!), a super geeky name, a kick-ass label and comes in really big bottles. Also: plate tectonics, just sayin.

TIRED: Won’t hold up for a long session (of procrastinating from work by reviewing beer instead), and the ginger flavor can overwhelm the rest of the beer.

*Personally, I don’t like that extra ‘a.’ Never did.

Image: Jonathan Snyder/Wired.com

No. 3: Biere de Mars

New Belgium Brewing, Fort Collins, Colorado

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Here at Wired, we love space. We love mind-blowing photos of space, cheesy artists’ renderings of space, planets, exoplanets … and beers named after planets. According to New Belgium Brewing, Biere de Mars was named for its distinctive orange color.

The name is also apt for a Belgian-style beer brewed with a wild yeast strain called Brettanomyces. Mars beers were derived from lambic beers which are produced through spontaneous fermentation by opening the brewery doors and letting all manner of stuff land in the vats. In southern Belgium, where the style was invented, one of the primary organisms that ends up in the vats is Brettanomyces. New Belgium adds a strain of this wild yeast for bottle conditioning — so geeky! This beer lives up to its name, and the name of its brewery.

This beer is brewed in limited quantities as part of New Belgium’s Lips of Faith line of “playground beers” where the brewers get indulge their whims. Biere de Mars was apparently brewed for the first time in three years, and we’re glad we managed to find a few of the last remaining bottles out there. The Wired drinking crew found this beer to be a low-key Belgian, which made for easy drinking though some found it too tame. The first thing everyone noticed about this beer, after the beautiful color and the lack of head, was the spice. I heard the word Christmas more than once, but it stops short of tasting like a holiday beer. As Wired Science intern Jess McNally put it, “It tastes a bit like pumpkin spice without the pumpkin.”

This beer is strong on malt and low on hops with a sweet start and a slightly sour, funky finish that we attributed to the wild yeast. It has some of that typical Belgian boozy feel to it, though it is a relatively mild 6.2 percent alcohol. Webmonkey editor Michael Calore summed it up as “sweet, but not too sweet.” Strangely, while everyone had more than usual to say about the different flavors in this beer, we were split on whether it had distinctive character or fell more on the mild and forgettable end of the spectrum. Personally I think Biere de Mars has a lot of interesting tastes, but they are subtle, which works for me. It could be a good training beer for people who aren’t sure about Belgian beers.

WIRED: Geeky wild yeast. Space!

TIRED: Too spicy for some, too bland for others.

Image: Jonathan Snyder/Wired.com

No. 4: Pliny the Elder

Russian River Brewing Company, Santa Rosa, California

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Whoo whee, this beer is hoppy! This is not a beer for everyone (especially not supertasters), but it is Russian River Brewing‘s most popular beer and has traditionally been a big hit among IPA aficionados.

The first time I encountered this beer, I thought it was so cool that someone had named a beer after a guy who had a type of volcanic eruption named after him. In 79 AD, Pliny the Elder died in Pompeii during the catastrophic eruption of Mount Vesuvius. His nephew, Pliny the Younger, was apparently watching the eruption from a safer distance and described it in a letter, which eventually led to that type of violently explosive eruption — that sends a huge column of ash way up into the stratosphere — being named a Plinian eruption.

Turns out this is not why the brewers named this beer, but their reason is almost as science geeky as mine. It so happens that Pliny the Elder was a botanist and was the first to give a scientific name to hops. Because they are so invasive and seem to be able to crawl up and cling to anything, he named them lupus Salictarius, which means something like wolf of the willows.

This 8-percent alcohol beer is a bit like a wolf, so the etymology is apt. The Wired beer reviewers found it to be light and approachable at first followed by a solid wallop of hops. The beer was compared to Oscar De La Hoya or a punch to the jaw and described as domineering, talented and awesome. The hops were too much for some of us, like reviews editor Danny Dumas who said it had “more hops than a kangaroo burger.” But the hoppiness hit the spot for others and left at least one reviewer wishing for more hops. We picked out some spiciness and hints of fruit, grass, citrus and juniper.

Pliny stood up pretty well at Wired, though it lost points for not leaving us wanting several more pints.

WIRED: Volcanoes, wolves, hops.

TIRED: More bitter than Cleveland Cavaliers fans after being ditched by LeBron James.

Image: Jonathan Snyder/Wired.com

No. 5: Evolution Amber Ale

Wasatch Brewing, Park City, Utah

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One of the best things about Utah’s odd reputation is that people think they can’t get a decent beer there, and consequently there are fewer jerks in front of me in the lift line at Snowbird. Another great thing about the state’s culture is it inspires people to do things like name beers Evolution Amber Ale, Polygamy Porter (Why have just one?) and Latter Day Stout.

In 2005, Wasatch Brewing changed the name of its amber ale from Unofficial Amber (a dig at Olympics organizers who had selected an official beer for the 2002 winter games in Salt Lake City) to Evolution Amber Ale. The new name was inspired by the debate among lawmakers in Utah, and many other parts of the country, over whether intelligent design should be taught alongside evolution in public schools.

The label says this “intelligently designed” beer is “Darwin Approved” and “Created in 27 days, not 7.” It pictures the classic human evolution lineup of primates gradually standing more upright, ending with a man drinking a beer and carrying a six pack that conveniently covers his ass.

The beer’s new name got the special undergarments of conservative Utah lawmakers in a bunch at a time when they were challenging the teaching of evolution in public schools. But in a 2005 interview with the (Mormon-owned) Deseret Morning News, the founder of Wasatch Brewing, Greg Schirf, said he wasn’t trying to provoke anyone. “We don’t have any issue with what people want to believe,” Schirf said. “We just believe religion should be held in religion classes, and science should be held in public school classes.”

Wasatch beers aren’t simply novelty beers you buy for the label though. Polygamy Porter won gold in the competitive Session Beer category at the World Beer Cup this year.

Evolution Amber makes a decent session beer as well, which won it a few points among the Wired reviewers. But many of them thought the beer veered a little too far toward drinkable and away from flavorful. While it has a smooth, promising, slightly sweet caramel taste at first, the hops are fleeting and it wanes quickly and feels thin at the end. The general consensus was that this is an average amber ale that goes down easy (good thing it’s 4 percent alcohol) but isn’t very memorable. Writer Steven Leckart summed up the forecast: “Cloudy with a chance of probably wouldn’t go out of my way to find it.”

WIRED: Tells Intelligent Designers to suck it.

TIRED: I forgot already.

Photo: Jonathan Snyder/Wired.com

No. 6: Moog Filtered Ale

Asheville Brewing Company, Asheville, North Carolina

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We should all aspire to be worthy of having a beer named after us once we’re gone. Electronic music pioneer Bob Moog certainly is. He’s best known for creating the Moog synthesizer which was so influential that the name is often used as a generic term for synthesizers. We’ll drink to that!

The limited edition Moog Filtered Ale beer was released by the Bob Moog Foundation on May 27 for the inventor’s 76th birthday. It was brewed by The Asheville Brewing Company in North Carolina and is only available until Aug. 15.

“Creating a beer that reflected Bob Moog’s achievements was a challenge for sure,” brewery president Mike Rangel wrote in an email to Wired.com. “We wanted to make something musical, free-formed and happy. It had to be an approachable beer and yet have its own distinctive style, so we went with a kind of hops that we had never used before called Chinooks and we are so glad that we took that gamble and rolled out a terrific beer that we are really proud of.”

The beer’s funky label was designed by local artist Phil Cheney and may be the best thing about this beer. It prominently features Moog’s iconic hair surrounded by nobs, cords and musical notes.

According to the brewery, it’s one of the fastest-selling beers they’ve ever made, though it wasn’t quite as possible here at Wired.com. While it is a decent pale-colored ale, it wasn’t as interesting as we hoped. It has a nice hoppy finish, but was a little too light for our taste. Writer Bryan Gardiner detected a hint of walnut, but beyond that, adjectives were scarce. The ale did score points for high drinkability, always a winning quality in our book. And it is certainly worth drinking considering the proceeds support the Bob Moog foundation’s mission to teach science through music.

How could anyone pass up an opportunity to benefit science by drinking beer?

WIRED: Sweet label. Every one of these beers you drink will help a child somewhere understand science better. Drink more!

TIRED: Not as interesting as Bob Moog’s hair.

Image: Jonathan Snyder/Wired.com

No. 7: Gigabit IPA

Hopworks Urban Brewery, Portland, Oregon

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You know the geek quotient is high at a brewery when it decides to try to lure Google to its city by brewing a beer for the company. Gigabit IPA is literally Google bait, intended to help convince the company to choose Portland for a trial of one of its experimental gigabit-per-second fiber networks. Over 1,000 communities are vying for Google’s attention, and many are pulling stunts including Topeka, Kansas, which changed its name to Google for a day.

Would you rather have a town named after you or a beer brewed for you? That’s what I thought. But we’ll have to wait to find out if Google feels the same. It plans to announce the chosen sites by the end of the year.

Gigabit IPA is not the first supremely geeky maneuver the folks at Hopworks Urban Brewery have pulled. Last year they teamed up with local bike shop Metrofiets to build a bike that hauls kegs around for something they call Biketobeerfest. Nice.

The Gigabit label is designed to look like the Google logo, and has some great little geeky details. Our favorite is the “PDX Is Feeling Lucky” button. The label was far better than the beer however. This IPA came in dead last among the geek beers, and I am wondering if our shipment didn’t wander out into the sun for a little too long on its way to Wired HQ. Or maybe it suffered from a really quick turn around time. Either way, it wasn’t popular here. It’s a pretty standard, dry northwest-style IPA with 5.9 percent alcohol, but it had a funky aftertaste and wasn’t fun to smell. As writer Erik Malinowski put it, “this beer does not have me feeling lucky.”

But we very much approve and encourage the brewing of beer in honor of techy entities (hint, hint).

WIRED: Google bait.

TIRED: This beer wouldn’t lure us to Portland, or anywhere.

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Image: Jonathan Snyder/Wired.com