What is a Christmas tree without a ‘Make America Great Again’ ornament, or a three-flavor popcorn bucket without a holiday quote from the president?

For the ardent Trump supporter, this holiday season is a particularly gleeful time.

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We’re allegedly saying Christmas again. There’s a strong, virile, 71-year-old man in the White House instead of a Kenyan or a crooked woman.

And, best of all, there’s a plethora of Trump-related Christmas tat to splurge on. It’s perfect for the True Patriot who thinks white people are under threat, that the Fake News Media hates Trump and that libtards are trying to take away our guns.

Trump gallon popcorn keepsake bucket

Who eats popcorn out of a bucket? The Breitbart reader, that’s who. Steve Bannon’s rightwing website is flogging a number of “Deplorable Christmas” gifts, the most interesting of which is this large tin bucket which comes with three flavors of popcorn: butter, caramel and cheese.

The lid is emblazoned with a quote from Trump: “We’re saying ‘Merry Christmas’ again.” Trump’s claim to have reintroduced the term “Merry Christmas” has been thoroughly debunked by the Washington Post, but the popcorn bucket is still popular – it’s currently sold out.

Make America Great Again Christmas ornament

Tree looking a bit bare? Then check out this ornament, on sale through Trump’s still operational campaign website. It’s just like the cap Trump wore during the campaign, except little!

“Made of brass and finished in 24-karat gold, this ornament is sure to make any tree stand out,” says the blurb. It costs $45, which will be offset by the massive tax cuts the poorest people in the country will soon receive.

Oh, wait. Well, let’s just say it costs $45.

Snowflake tree accessory

The perfect accompaniment to the little Maga hat, this ornament is a fun gift based on the rightwing “snowflake” slur. It is again offered by Breitbart.

“It was a very, very rough year for snowflakes, and at Breitbart we are sensitive to their collective plight. To that end we are offering this sturdy Snowflake Tree Ornament,” Breitbart’s sales pitch says.

Now Trump has restored the term Christmas, this is the perfect gift to help you embrace the true meaning of the day: antagonizing political foes. It’s what Jesus would have wanted.

Photograph: Supplied

Trump deluxe mask

Not specifically a Christmas gift, but perfect for any season. This latex match will be perfect for those among us who wish to look like Trump.

It’s being sold by Walmart, which has nailed the president’s jowls and disappearing jaw but gone a bit overboard with the cross-eyes.

Trump calendar

Play Video 0:15 Spend each day of 2018 with Donald Trump thanks to your very own calendar – video

It’s a great chance to relive some of the best moments of Trump’s presidency.

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In the absence of any actual achievements, the calendar is mostly just photos of Trump standing around like an eastern European dictator. There’s Trump looking solemn in front of a helicopter and solemn in front of a car, while December’s photo is Trump looming over a Merry Christmas sign like some sort of beardless Santa.

A personal favorite month is August, which shows Trump giving Melania one of those kisses where she visibly recoils.

Official Merry Christmas Hat

This is just Trump’s Make America Great Again hat, but someone has stuck some colorful little bits behind the logo. It says Merry Christmas on the back, too.

Including shipping, it costs $53. You can buy a drone for that.