SUNDAYS Liverpool-City game has Manchester United fans agonising about who they least want to win the title.

The fans, who now have nothing better to do than moan about other teams, face the impossible decision of either backing the Red scum or the Blue scum.

United supporter Wayne Hayes said: “The thought of Liverpool being only one title behind us makes me unsteady with rage, but I walk past City fans and have to look at their smug, success-bloated faces every day.

Although at least City fans know theyre the playthings of oil money, rather than believing the title is a God-given reward for their natural Scouse superiority.

On reflection, I think it would probably be best if football stopped now.”

The teams are thought to be equally matched in terms of cheating foreign strikers, manager arrogance and token English players who will receive injuries that keep them out of the World Cup.

Bookie Tom Logan said: Its a tough choice between soulless mercenaries buying success or the arrogance of returned kings proclaiming a thousand-year Reich.

But at least the rest of us can be glad that Manchester fucking United arent winning it again.