Ever have cravings for something crispy and sweet and new?

Our Guest Blogger, Andy Bryan, is a recovering anthropologist who lives in the state of Arizona and denial. Asked to write a bit about himself, he responded that he "like orangutans and baklava and orangutans that eat baklava. Sidle up, dear reader, and join me as I transcend mortal categories of interest on this site in a noble search for all things absurd."

Here's his sweet concnoction for the readers of AmericanInventorSpot.com:

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Following in the bloated, waddling footsteps of such state fair culinary giants as the pioneering corndog, its multitude of "on-a-stick" brethren, and the myriad of experimentally battered and deep-fried comestibles ranging from Twinkies to Snickers bars, comes what just might be the most revolutionary of carnivalesque cuisine in America so far- fried Coke. Yes, you heard that right- fried soda . And, if you're anything like me, the first thought that sprinted through your wrinkled noggin was, "Holy elephant ears on a stick! Just how in the name of all that is holy do they deep-fry a liquid?"

Well, dear reader, it seems we have underestimated our countrymen, for if there were ever a place where sugar-loaded, caffeinated beverages could be transformed into bite-sized balls of artery-clogging batter, it has to be America. And, thanks to America's optimism and innovative spirit, coupled with a maniacally food-driven culture, we can chalk up another delectable door to death for our team.

So just how do we achieve the impossible- frying that which is not solid? We owe the ingenious solution to Abel Gonzales , a 36-year-old computer analyst from the state where everything (including the tension on elastic waistbands) is bigger- Texas. Gonzales concocted his bewitching balls of batter from a combination of Coca-Cola syrup, strawberry syrup, and the solid matrix that makes deep-fried liquid a glorious reality- a strawberry. Plunged into the fryer, the syrupy strawberries emerge in all their ping-pong-sized, spherical splendor where they are heaped into in a cup and doused in All-American accoutrements that include even more Coca-Cola syrup, whipped cream, and cinnamon. This, of course, is topped off with none other than the iconic maraschino cherry and voila- the perfect addition to our robust family of sugar-saturated, State fair snacks.

At this point, you may be bemoaning your choice of geographic residence. But, if you are one of the millions who do not live in Texas, take heed. North Carolina and Arizona are already bravely following in the syrupy footsteps of the Lone Star state and you can probably expect fried Coke to make its momentous debut at any of the other 47 state fairs next year.

With all the sincerity I can muster, I know that I'll be waiting with bated breath for the arrival of this deep-fried manna from Texas and I don't think it too presumptuous to believe that you will too. How can I be so certain that you will be sharing in my anticipation? Well, it's simple. Whereas the deep-fried Twinkie and Snickers bar seemed to be only overkill, fried Coke is just the right product to satiate our American sensibilities. In our current age of health awareness, fried Coke succeeds where the battering and deep-frying of cream-infused sponge cake and chocolate-coated caramel fail. Not only is Coca-Cola as American as apple pie, it's deep-fried manifestation will satisfy at least one of the daily-recommended servings of fruit.

Or, at least I believe it will.

Now, if only it were on a stick.

Andy Bryan

Guest Blogger

AmericanInventorSpot.com

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