They’re making a sequel to Groundhog Day and it’s a Playstation virtual reality game. Here’s the trailer:

OK, fine, universe, you’re right, I kind of sleepwalked through that. Let’s go again. Remember the 1993 Bill Murray film Groundhog Day? Well, over the weekend, Sony released a trailer for Groundhog Day: Like Father, Like Son, a virtual reality game for the Playstation 4. Check it out:

Not good enough? In 1993, director Harold Ramis discovered new depths in Bill Murray’s comedic persona, drawing a brilliant performance from his one-time Second City castmate. Sadly, over the course of the film’s production their decades-long friendship came to an end; the two men didn’t reconcile until Ramis was terminally ill. But now, thanks to the stereoscopic 3-D goggles of the Playstation 4’s VR headset, you can discover new depths of your own in the upcoming sequel Groundhog Day: Like Father, Like Son. Check out the trailer!

Look, making me write this post over and over again until I learn a valuable lesson about fully engaging in my own life might be harsh but fair, but blasting “I Got You, Babe” while I try to do it is just cruel. Bill Murray just had to get out of bed, not arrange facts about Groundhog Day and Groundhog Day: Like Father, Like Son into a semi-legible form for an online magazine. They say a sequel to Groundhog Day won’t pay the rent, because critics agree that before it’s earned goddammit turn off that music I can’t think!!!!

Groundhog Day is a video game now? Gunshot, body slumps onto keyboardddddddfals;ghauefdfk

You know what? You can make me relive the experience of writing this terrible post over and over again, in the sense that you can keep sending me back in time whenever I click “publish,” but you can’t control what I write about. I could just copy and paste things from the Wikipedia entry for “hookworm infection” over and over again and you couldn’t stop me.

Two common hookworm infections in humans are ancylostomiasis and necatoriasis, caused by the species Ancylostoma duodenale and Necator americanus respectively. Hookworm eggs are deposited in the stools of infected people. If these end up in the environment, they can hatch into larvae (immature worms), which can then penetrate the skin. One type can also be spread through contaminated food. Risk factors include walking barefoot in warm climates, where sanitation is poor. Diagnosis is by examination of a stool sample with a microscope.

Larval invasion of the skin (mostly in the Americas) can produce a skin disease called cutaneous larva migrans also known as creeping eruption. The hosts of these worms are not human and the larvae can only penetrate the upper five layers of the skin, where they give rise to intense, local itching, usually on the foot or lower leg, known as ground itch. This infection is due to larvae from the A. braziliense hookworm. The larvae migrate in tortuous tunnels between the stratum basale and stratum corneum of the skin, causing serpiginous vesicular lesions. With advancing movement of the larvae, the rear portions of the lesions become dry and crusty. The lesions are typically intensely itchy.

Looks like I overestimated how willing I was to read about hookworm infections, even in the service of passive aggressively refusing to learn a valuable life lesson. But if you think that means I’m going to actually learn my lesson, write something sincere and informative about the trailer to the Playstation VR game Groundhog Day: Like Father Like Son, and possibly marry Andie MacDowell, you’re vastly underestimating how stubbornly I refuse to engage in any form of self-improvement. Check out the trailer!

What if I just stopped trying to write this post? What if I never tried to do anything again? Maybe the lesson I’m supposed to learn here is not “Life is a beautiful journey worth paying attention to” but something more along the lines of “Give up forever and go play video games, loser!” It’s not often that the universe sends me an elaborate metaphysical message, and even rarer that that message is “Go be lazy,” but there’s no law that says I can’t interpret every last sign, symbol, and video game trailer as an admonition to goof off. And that starts right here, by refusing to write anything else about the trailer for Groundhog Day: Like Father Like Son, no matter how many times I come to in front of an empty Word document.

You win! You win! I’ll be a better person! I’ll put other people’s needs first! I’ll buy Michael Shannon tickets to Wrestlemania! Just make it stop!

God. Damn. It.