This last Saturday I took a trip up to Seattle to see The Vandals. As a part of No Pants 2011, and because I had forgotten a pair of shorts, I was wearing a skirt. No big deal right? After not even getting the “oops open palm on your butt!” in the pit at Queens of the Stone Age two weeks ago, I wasn’t super worried about being in the pit at El Corazon in a skirt.

I was wrong. Within the first 3 songs I had not only had the “open palm on your ass ha ha oops” multiple times, but TWICE someone tried to put their FINGERS up my skirt. I had to leave, I couldn’t stay for the rest of the show (for which I payed $30), I didn’t get to see Boyfriend jump up on stage and hug The Vandals, and I felt angry and unsafe for the rest of the show.

What bothers me the most right now is that my first thought was “Oh shit, I knew I should have worn shorts.” That’s how far I have still internalized sexism. No! I should be able to wear whatever I want and not have someone put their fingers between my legs. There is no reason anyone has the right to do that!

I hate that this happened. I hate that that is the memory I will have of this weekend and that the show was completely ruined for me by someone deciding that my body was not my own to make choices with. My body was his because I wore clothes that he doesn’t. As a girl who loves punk and pits and moshing it is so upsetting to me that I will now always feel more nervous than I deserve jumping in to enjoy music with other fans.

This was not something I had thought would happen as a result of No Pants 2011.