Jeffrey Eugenides, Susan Orlean, James Ellroy, Mary Roach, Ishmael Reed, Adam Mansbach, Jane Smiley, Chris Adrian, Thomas McGuane, Christopher Moore, Daniel Woodrell, Deepak Chopra, Cyra McFadden, and Guillermo Gomez-Peña are just a few of the authors scheduled to read at this year's Litquake Festival. "Er, like, what's Litquake," you derp? Well, Litquake is the city's annual festival of literature devoted to the printed word. Lots of words. Dangerous words.

However, Litquake is best known for their boozy Litcrawl, proving to be the festival's most anticipated event, which boasts 75 venues "hosting readings in three phases in the Mission" with many bar stops along the way.

Here's a list of some of your favorite authors scheduled to perform, many of them making their Litquake debut.

Donnell Alexander - Journalist and author part of the Afro Surrealism movement (Litquake debut)

Chris Adrian - Author of The Great Night and pediatric oncologist

Brian Christian - Poet and author of The Most Human Human (Litquake debut)

Catherine Coulter - Thriller and suspense author of 65 novels, 59 of which have made it to The New York Times bestseller list (Litquake debut) Note: this appearance is scheduled but still to be confirmed

James Ellroy - Master of noir in-conversation with Janis Cooke Newman

Jefferey Eugenides - Author of the The Virgin Suicides, Middlesex and the upcoming The Marriage Plot (Litquake debut)

Christa Faust - Mystery “Neo pulp” author (Litquake debut)

Julia Glass - Author of Three Junes and The World Whole World Over; and I See You Everywhere (Litquake debut)

Guillermo Gómez-Peña - Author and performance artist

Sara Gran - Crime and thriller author (Litquake debut)

Andrew Sean Greer - Author of The Confessions of Max Tivoli and The Story of a Marriage

Daniel Handler - Author who also moonlights as Lemony Snicket when the mood suits

Chuck Klosterman - Nationally known essayist with a bent for pop culture and consulting editor for Grantland.com (Litquake debut)

Jillian Lauren - Former stripper and escort who ultimately fled her life in the harem of the Prince of Brunai and wrote the memoir, Some Girls: My Life in a Harem

Adam Mansbach - Fiction writer responsible for Go the Fuck To Sleep among other more literary works

Cyra McFadden - Beloved Bay Area author, columnist and satirist who first came to prominence in the late 70s with The Serial: A Year in the Life of Marin County (Litquake debut)

Marc Maron - Comedian and Broadcaster live on stage

Tom McGuane - Novelist, screenwriter and essayist in conversation with Litquake cofounder Jack Boulware (Litquake debut)

Christopher Moore - Author and satirist

Alejandro Murguia - Poet, short story writer and teacher at SF State and two time American Book Award winner

Susan Orlean - New Yorker writer and author of The Orchid Thief (Litquake debut)

Mary Roach - Author deservedly known for her one-word titles such as Stiff, Spook and Bonk

Ishmael Reed - Recipient of the 2011 Barbary Coast Award

Karen Russell - New Yorker “ 20 Under 40” alum and author of the collection Swamplandia (Litquake debut) Note: appearance is scheduled but still to be confirmed

Melanie Rae Thon - Noted American author’s work will be part of Stories on Stage (Litquake debut)

Dan Woodrell - Author who elevated “rural noir” to the status of literature with his novel Winter’s Bone (Litquake Debut)

Litquake runs from October 7-15.