As UC Berkeley students, we’re indoctrinated with an intense drive to succeed. After all, attending the world’s number one public university isn’t possible without high motivation and the willingness to take on a challenging workload. But our busy schedules make it a common misconception that idle time is equated to wasted time. In reality, our Google calendars depict Tetris nightmares. All the brightly colored, organized boxes betray a sense that we have it all together. But, how often do we even leave space and time to sleep and eat? Something needs to change.

Setting the bar so high for ourselves isn’t inherently a bad thing. It’s the moment when we place the bar so high that we compromise our health and happiness that it becomes a problem. We constantly want to live up to our parent’s expectations, society’s expectations and, most importantly, our own. Thus, we tend to bite off more than we can chew. Going to class, managing clubs left and right, commuting to internships, spending hours at practice and working daily shifts are common tasks we have to do. The list goes on and on.

When we finally have some free time, we get to unwind and enjoy ourselves … right? Then, why do we sometimes feel guilty when we’re having fun? In “The Feminine Mystique,” Betty Friedan describes the despondency American housewives felt in the 1960s and calls it “the problem that has no name.” Although we no longer live in the 20th century, we can relate to the dissatisfaction they felt with their lives at having to live up to an ideal. We’re not miserable. But capitalism ingrains us with a sense that it’s a rat race to the top. We all have an innate desire to make something of ourselves. We want to believe that doing well in school will lead to a high-paying job, which will pay off our daunting pile of student loans.

The problem is that we strive so hard to not to be mediocre that we sacrifice so much of our well-being in the process. When we’re home for the weekend and visiting our families, our minds often wander off to the schoolwork insidiously taunting us from inside our backpacks. When we finally get one hour to ourselves to rewatch “Parks and Recreation,” we’re laughing our asses off but also stressfully thinking that we should be doing more productive things with our time. We can relate to having our eyes bulge in amazement at hearing the news of that one friend who just got that glamorous internship at Facebook. Immediately afterward, this sinking feeling at the pit of our stomach transports us to a dark place where we question the status of all our life goals. It’s O.K. — you’re not alone. We’re all going through a period of self-doubt and uncertainty about the future. We’re just trying not to crack under the enormous pressure we put on ourselves.

It never feels like we’re doing enough. Our friends are so accomplished that we often neglect to acknowledge our own accomplishments. We constantly compare ourselves to others, but we need to stop disparaging ourselves. We need to know when to draw the line. How else are we going to move forward if we end up burning ourselves out now? Self-care is important. So let’s please leave some blank spaces in our Google calendars for some me time. Sometimes, we all need a second, or two, to breathe.

Contact Abigail Balingit at [email protected].