I’m really introverted in a very specific way. If someone walks up to me and starts a conversation, I’m usually a very lively and engaged individual. But when it comes to randomly approaching people, I’m as shy as one could be.

My reclusiveness doesn’t really stem from an inability to talk to people “IRL” though, it has more to do with my repulsion to inefficient communication.

A networking event is really just a series of calculated bets. Kind of like dating. Cultural norms don’t let you simply exit a conversation if you quickly realize a person is neither useful or entertaining to you, so you’re stuck finding ways to wrap it up and move on to your next attempt. Regardless of how niche the event is, the reality is that no more than 1 or 2 people can really make a difference for you. That means the ROI of your time versus the value you’ll get out of fellow attendees is pretty darn low.

Some may argue that it’s easier to get in front of someone at a networking event that you otherwise wouldn’t be able to talk to. To some degree that’s true (I met Mark Cuban that way) but so what? That person won’t remember you and they’ll just tell you to email them anyways. (And that’s what he did.)

My perspective…work hard to filter down the people you really want to get in touch with, and then work even harder to find really unique and honest ways to get their attention. If you’re lucky, you can take them out to coffee and get their full attention. (And not have to pitch them while they’re giving you half of their attention).

Networking events can pay off occasionally, but in the grand scheme of things, it’s not a good use of your time.