Stamford’s newly elected trans legislator, a triathlete, sets another record with Board of Reps win

Raven Matherne, Stamford's first transgender city rep, poses for a photo on a large boulder next to her house in north Stamford, Conn. on Thursday, Nov. 9, 2017. Matherne climbed the boulder as a kid, saying, "it was the first mountain I ever climbed." less Raven Matherne, Stamford's first transgender city rep, poses for a photo on a large boulder next to her house in north Stamford, Conn. on Thursday, Nov. 9, 2017. Matherne climbed the boulder as a kid, saying, ... more Photo: Michael Cummo / Hearst Connecticut Media Buy photo Photo: Michael Cummo / Hearst Connecticut Media Image 1 of / 14 Caption Close Stamford’s newly elected trans legislator, a triathlete, sets another record with Board of Reps win 1 / 14 Back to Gallery

STAMFORD — Raven Matherne knows how to push her body to its limits. Over the past decade, she ran a 50-mile marathon, earned three martial arts black belts and swam from Alcatraz Island to mainland California alongside sharks.

“People would always say, ‘You’re in such great shape,’ and I am objectively able to say, ‘Yes, I’m in great shape.’ But I’ve never been able to say, ‘I’m OK with my body,’” she said.

That began to change in March after the nationally competitive athlete started hormone replacement therapy, an early step in living as a transgender woman.

Then in July, Matherne, 29, earned the Democratic City Committee’s nod to run for a seat on the Board of Representatives in what would be a competitive race in an evenly split Democrat-Republican district. Just months into hormone replacement therapy, Matherne canvassed her neighborhood, knocking on the doors of neighbors who had previously known her as Ryan.

“Every day I had to practice coming out again,” she said.

The exchange was positive. Or it was awkward. Sometimes it was bad. There’s no script for this sort of thing, she says.

“It’s not a bad conversation so much as I haven’t figured out the answer to this problem yet, so now it’s bad,” Matherne said of correcting someone who may say something wrong or insensitive.

Nonetheless, her district spoke at the polls, electing Matherne as the city and state’s first transgender lawmaker alongside other transgender candidates from across the country who earned victories on Election Day. It positions Matherne and Stamford as part of a burgeoning movement of openly transgender people seeking elected office for the first time.

“When LGBTQ candidates step up and run for office — especially when they win — our community has a voice and a fighting chance at preserving equality and making a fairer country for us all,” said Anthony Crisci, executive director of the Triangle Community Center in Norwalk, a resource for the LGBTQ community in Fairfield County.

Matherne is one of at least eight known transgender candidates nationwide to win office Tuesday. The list includes Virgina Democrat Danica Roem, who became the state’s first transgender legislator after beating a 13-term Republican incumbent who introduced a bill to restrict transgender bathroom use, and Andrea Jenkins, the first transgender black person to win a seat on the Minneapolis City Council.

Connecticut also has a transgender candidate running for governor in 2018, Republican Jayce Wyatt, of Branford.

Matherne, who noted her gender orientation in her campaign literature, says she didn’t run on being a transgender candidate. “I didn’t want it to come off like I ran because I was trans. It’s more like I ran in spite of it,” she said.

Matherne was part of the Reform Stamford slate that sought change on the Board of Representatives, and succeeded in winning eight of 40 seats. Their platform focused on taxes, community-minded development, enforcing zoning laws, affordable housing and protecting public spaces.

They’re all issues Matherne, a longtime city resident, says she knows well. Matherne has lived most of her life in North Stamford with her parents, Beverly Haynie and Louis Matherne. She and her younger brother were homeschooled, an experience she says instilled in her a love of learning and the ability to self-direct her studies. Neither sibling went to college. Matherne says it wasn’t needed to become a martial arts instructor, a job she left around the beginning of her transition.

Neither her run for city government nor her transition have dulled Matherne’s compulsive athletic drive. Her goal of running marathons in 50 states — she’s hit 26 already — still stands. She’s eyeing a race in Washington next year that’s more than 200 miles. In 2012, she competed in the New York-New Jersey Ironman Triathlon, a challenge solely for the athletically ambitious — or crazy. It involves a 2.4-mile swim, 112-mile bike ride and 26.2-mile run.

The inevitable outcome of hormone replacement therapy to become female is reduced speed and strength. Matherne is already feeling it. At her peak, she could dead-lift 425 pounds. Now she’s down to 300.

“Across the board physically, I’ve just dropped off,” the 5-foot-9 Matherne said. “It feels like I’ve turned into a suit of armor in that I both feel incredibly heavy and hollow. It’s just really weird.”

Two years into hormone replacement therapy, Matherne will begin to compete as female in athletic events, she says, based on guidelines established by the International Olympic Committee. A blood test is required. Until then, she’ll enter as male.

“I’m not doing this to cheat or gain any advantage,” she said. “I will happily compete with men until I believe I am at a point where it is fair for me to compete with women.”

Matherne says coming out as transgender was a choice, but not in the way most people assume it to be.

“My whole life I’ve struggled with depression, because when you’ve struggled with the issues I’ve had and choose not to do anything, that means you must also choose to deny a part of yourself and put down a part of your self,” she said. “And that leads only to self-hate.

“It got to a point where I had one of two options — I can either kill myself or I can move forward this way, which is why it’s such a serious issue when people call this a choice. There was a choice, but it’s not the choice that people reference when they call it a ‘gender choice.’ The choice was to opt out.”

Matherne revealed herself as transgender to her family, friends and girlfriend, Sabrina Lewis, in January. Matherne has been with Lewis, a 31-year-old who works at a financial services firm, for three years.

“I hate telling people I feel like a woman, because I feel like that sounds like I’m trying to say I know what it is to be a woman, and I’ve lived my whole life with male privilege,” she said. “I think I describe it more accurately when I say I’ve lived my whole life with a brain that expects my body to female.”

From a political standpoint, Josh Fedeli, chairman of the Democratic City Committee, says the city party has a history of promoting LGBTQ values. Andrew McDonald, a former state senator from Stamford and city corporation counsel, is Connecticut’s first openly gay Supreme Court justice.

“It is a legacy that we are proud to be part of, and I expect Raven to do great things for Stamford,” Fedeli said.

Matherne was the second-highest vote getter in the 19th District, which spans the western part of North Stamford. She earned 896 votes, coming in behind fellow Democrat Bob Lion (each district has two representatives) and ahead of Republicans Gail Okun, the incumbent, and Elisa Esses.

“I was pleased to see that the voters of the 19th District showed no prejudice in supporting an openly trans woman,” Mayor David Martin said. “I am thankful that we elected the right people for the job, no matter their religion, ethnic origin, or gender identity.”

Matherne, who will be among the Board of Representatives’ youngest members, doesn’t expect to have an easy time in elected office.

“I know for a fact there will be a layer of judgment, if only because there is judgment for any woman, cis or trans,” she said, referring to the term “cisgender,” which describes people whose gender identity matches the sex they were assigned at birth.

But Matherne says she has always tackled problems head-on, whether it’s her gender identity or politics.

“I was raised that if you see a problem, you don’t just talk about it, you do something about it,” she said. “I was the crazy person who was afraid of heights, so I jumped out of an airplane. That’s how I handle this stuff. I’m afraid of public speaking, so I ran for office.”

eskalka@stamfordadvocate.com