Obscure references FTW

Distracted, the mother said to her boy,

"Do you try to upset and perplex and annoy?

Now, give me four reasons — - and don't play the fool — -

why you shouldn't get up and get ready for school."



Her son replied slowly, "Well, mother, you see,

I can't stand the teachers and they detest me;

and there isn't a boy or a girl in the place

that I like or, in turn, that delights in my face."



"And I'll give you two reasons," she said, "why you ought

get yourself off to school before you get caught;

because, first, you are forty, and, next, you young fool,

it's your job to be there.

You're the head of the school."



-Gregory Harrison