I can’t figure out how to make ‘bargaining’ work within the thematic framework I rather stupidly set myself for this series of posts, so I’m bargaining with you now to just be chill about it, and try and imagine it’s there. See? Problem solved, motherfuckers.

Reddit user Taengoosundies requested we take a look at this one in our retrospective/obituary of 4Minute, and I can’t blame him because it is a FUCKING JAM and they all look hotter than the surface of the God damn sun in what I’d imagine were supremely uncomfortable and wildly impractical outfits.

Things I like about this song/MV include the random giggle at 00:43, the pumping instrumental, the way their bodies look in those silver bodysuits, the fact that at the start of the song Hyuna is very clearly saying “Four mini slut, four mini slut,” the way they wear those silver bodysuits, Jesus, talk about body goals, and the time honoured tradition of K-Pop singers liking ‘dat’ a-la T-ARA in ‘Roly Poly.’ I also appreciate, (along with how they look in those fucking silver bodysuits) the family-friendly choreography.

Thank you to Taengoosundies for suggesting this song, I’d forgotten how sublimely, prostate-stimulatingly, ass-poundingly good it is. Definitely one for my main playlist – stay woke, Taengoosundies.

Break(it)down

In terms of Hyuna Dominance, this is quite Hyuna-driven, possibly the high/low point of Hyuna making everyone else in the group seem like Korean Ringo, depending on your perspective. Hyuna Dominance level of 8/10. I tried to balance that out with this picture of Gayoon (I think it’s Gayoon, anyway – the Black Hole of Hyuna Dominance is unbalancing my already dangerously out-of-kilter mind.)

K-Pop MV weirdness is… well. It’s not very weird, is it? So I guess 0/10. It’s about as weird as a loaf of bread, although a fair bit sexier.

Too hot for Netizens rating: There’s booty-droppin’, hand-twirlin’, floor-humpin’, face-strokin’, and this

9/10.

Lyrics (with thanks to Color Coded Lyrics:

Break it down, break it down,

Baby, I like dat Baby, baby, just, uh I like dat

Baby, I like dat Baby, baby, just, uh I like dat

10/10, I cry every time.

I asked my friend The Cambrodian (formerly Bul Gogi, a Cambodian living in Korea) for his take, as he’d never heard/seen the song before, and tends to be brutally honest.

[Cambrodian] Just watched it for the first time. It’s pretty catchy, but not my type

[Cambrodian] The music video is so high quality for a video that was released quite awhile back

[Cambrodian] I dont like the chorus cause its really repetitive

[Cambrodian] Oh

[Cambrodian] 2011?

[Cambrodian] Not too long nvm

[KCMF] 5 years is a century in kpop

[KCMF] Marks out of 10, for song, MV and Ass?

[Cambrodian] MV 7/10

[Cambrodian] Song 5/10

[Cambrodian] Ass 9/10

Meanwhile, Lim put on his English Major hat and tried to decipher the song’s meaning.

[Lim] are all female kpop group has their choreography choreographed by vajajay obessed perverts?

[Lim] Why do most of them have at least one of these types of hand gestures in their choreography??

[Lim] Rubbing their palms gently swirling around their fingers…. what are they doing?

[KCMF] This is gold, keep it coming

[Lim] I’m sorry i cannot be the only one noticing the lyrics “mirror, mirror, who’s the prettiest?” Coming up at the scene where they rub against their palms slowly

[Lim] Unlike men girls have inverted genitals so I heard it’s very common for women to get curious and explore tbeir genitals as get little older

[Lim] By seeing the reflection of their coochie on mirrors

[Lim] I cracked it, this song is about exploring your coochie for the first time

[KCMF] Okay..?

[Lim] Ahhh they were saying “4minutes left” stfu they’re not saying “four mini slut” you asshole

Overall rating: Fuckin’, 9/10 at least. Great track, great MV, an almost JYP-level of ass on display, it’s K-Pop at its peak. I miss you, 4Minute… please come back. (See? Bargaining. This shit is THEMATICALLY CONSISTENT YO.)

Also, how the fuck could they breathe in those outfits? It’s almost (almost) difficult to find them attractive because I’m genuinely concerned. Well, they survived (except for Hyuna, who was replaced with a robot), so I shall ogle in peace.

Overall, this is a very by-the-numbers pop song, but when those numbers are all nines and tens, then it’s more than forgivable and really, downright great. 4/4.

Thanks for reading, my little 동생들~