The Vampire Diaries S06E07: "Do You Remember the First Time?"

Where do you generally hide your magic? In a tasteful decanter? Tangled up in a dreamcatcher? In an ostrich's tum-tum? The fact is, magic can be stored virtually anywhere. For years I stored my magic in a broken Gameboy. Then when my rap career took off, I stored my magic in a broken The Game, boy. He was having a hard day and this did not make things easier and I want to personally apologize to The Game for having stored my magic in him, it wasn't right.

This week on The Vampire Diaries, Bonnie shoved her magic directly up the wahoo of a Teddy Bear and she zapped that bear into another dimension. An interesting take on magic storage, for sure, but also an apt metaphor for preserving the innocence of childhood. Just kidding, ain't nobody got time for metaphors. Just keep your magic in a warm, dry place! That's probably the main takeaway from "Do You Remember the First Time?" which was the newest installment of the Great Vampire Diaries Hot Streak of 2k14. It was a good episode and we should talk about it!

We began immediately after last week's episode left off: with a confused woman answering the door to find a handsome acquaintance claiming they were once in love. And it was about as awkward as you expected!

The big question of the episode was, Must you already have longstanding feelings for someone in order to be in love? Forget in-the-moment attraction or love at first sight; should you actively avoid someone just because you can't remember having loved them in the past? Sure, "Do You Remember the First Time?" was quick to specify that Elena's wasn't exactly a clean slate—she still had full memory of all the bad things Damon had done to her. Terrible things! Still though, if I'd blacked out and then someone informed me that during that time I'd experienced an epic love with an allegedly bad person who happened to look like Ian Somerhalder, I'd probably take my chances and give it a shot. But I am not a teenage girl and also this is a 100 percent fictional scenario in every way. Still! Elena was being VERRRY cautious for reasons I didn't totally buy.

So then Damon went to the hospital and teased Alaric for being mortal again.

Oh, here's what was great about Damon in this episode: In the past he used to deal with rejection or frustration by turning into a really bad person and doing terrible sh*t to the people around him. But here? He was downright chill and understanding about what'd happened, and he seemed open to figuring things out. "Optimism" would become the theme of the episode, and honestly it was really refreshing! Mature, even. And this tiny moment where Damon and Alaric got real with each other was a real chest-clencher:

You know? Clearly The Vampire Diaries wants us to root for Damon and it is WORKING. Anyway, then Jo came in and hilariously explained that her method for curing vampirism was a one-time deal and will never, ever happen again. Haha okay, show. Way to tie up THAT loose end.

Meanwhile Tripp was not having the best day. After crashing his van, the fellas (including Matt) chained him up in that weird forest shack and attempted to get ANSWERS out of him. Who else knew about vampires? And why and when and also perhaps what? All of the answers.

Meanwhile Elena and Caroline came to an agreement about maybe not dating Salvatores anymore.

Which was not the worst thing in the world considering Elena already had her next piece all lined up! Unfortunately Liam had started piecing together the particulars of the time Elena miraculously gave a girl CPR and it fixed her shoulder injury.

Whoops, get your story together, Elena. He's onto you!

Meanwhile in 1994, Kai and Bonnie were experiencing a tense roommate situation after he shot her with an arrow.

(Should I nitpick the timeline here? Is this plotline still chronologically aligned with the modern-day one? So Bonnie has been passed out on the sofa for over a day? I don't know, guys.)

Kai definitely needs to learn better roommate etiquette, and in my book the #1 rule of being a roommate is don't try to siphon off your roommate's magical powers without his or her permission. Otherwise this may happen:

Despite being nearly mortally wounded for over 24 hours, Bonnie was NOT messing around in her escape plan. As Kai lay dying on the floor bleeding from the neck, she cobbled together all the broken Ascendant pieces and got the H outta there.

(Have we talked about how weird this hospital is? First of all, those stairs must be fun for gurneys and wheelchairs to deal with. Secondly it's so small? But you know what, that makes sense. There are very few medical issues in Mystic Falls other than brutal murder, so the town was right to maybe put more resources into the morgue than the hospital.)

And like anyone with full, unfettered access to hospital supplies, Bonnie got to WORK:

This was the third episode in a row where a witch did not using any kind of healing spell. Quick question, has it been established that witches can't heal people? I kind of thought they could? Jo and Liv didn't even attempt it (though Jo had her reasons), and Bonnie was curing her chest wound with a Band-Aid and some acetaminophen. Witchcraft just does not seem super awesome on this show, sorry.

Next: Page 2