Shia LaBeouf may have retired his short-lived rap career, but he’s still willing to put it all on the line. Most recently he bared his soul for a role in director Dito Montiel’s Man Down, which just had its debut at Venice Film Festival. Playing Gabriel Drummer – an ex-marine who suffers PTSD after being discharged from Afghanistan – left him “suicidal,” he said in a recent interview. “You try your hardest, you know? You jump onto some other train of thought, or some other passion, or fall in love with another creative process and sort of find yourself somewhere else.”

That “somewhere else” was, according to LaBeouf, an intensely lonely place. “This is definitely the most difficult thing I’ve ever worked on, emotionally, with anyone, which is why I had to do it with (Montiel),” he continued. “I needed a friend – otherwise, you can’t get this vulnerable.”

“I needed a friend – otherwise, you can’t get this vulnerable” – Shia LaBeouf

This is somewhat of a revelation, as it was no big secret that for David Ayer’s WWII tank epic Fury, LaBeouf endured intense emotional mindfuckery at the hands of Ayer and his fellow cast mates; he also refused to wash and would live in the army tank, even pissing in close quarters. “We peed in the tank for sure,” recalls Fury actor Logan Lerman. “We didn’t leave, you know? We met with tankers and bottom line is – tankers don’t leave their tank.”

He’s continuing his enrolment with army-based characters in Man Down as US Marine Gabriel Drummer, a role that came at a time when LaBeouf was “at a really low place.” He’s already being praised by critics for his ability to express a huge range of emotions in the part. Watch a clip from the film below: