I’m scared y’all. In fact, I’m terrified. A week from now I’m moving to a country I’ve never visited (France, for those who haven’t been following my au pair adventure) to live in a city where I have almost no friends. I’m putting my life in two suitcases and leaving the only country I’ve ever known to go on a crazy adventure. And although I’m excited to move abroad and live my expat dream, I’m also really afraid.

I’m afraid that I won’t make friends and the family I’m au pairing for won’t like me. I’m afraid I’ll say something horrible in French and embarrass myself out of the country, making me a nomad with no home. I’m afraid the stylish skinny people will turn up their nose at my frumpy frame and trying too hard outfits. I’m scared that I’ll be alone in the city of love. I’m scared because I’ve never been out of America, no matter how cool and cultured I try to be. I’m scared I’ll lose my friends back home and everything will be different when I return.

I’m terrified of change.

But what I’m more afraid of is never doing anything. I’m terrified of never doing anything and never going anywhere. I’m afraid of sitting on my laptop for the rest of my life watching other people accomplish what I dream of. I’m scared of staying in my comfort zone and missing out on adventures and relationships. I’m afraid of living a stagnant life.

So I’m leaving my safe comfort zone and heading out with the digital nomads and American expats worldwide. I’m going to live so that I don’t have to ask what if. I’m going to follow my dream and go on an adventure that will change my life. I’m moving abroad – because I’m terrified.

So here goes nothing. Follow me on my au pair experience in Paris and see where it takes me.

Spoiler alert from Celina in the future: All roads lead back to Paris 😉

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