Some people even ask, ‘Was the trip to visit your secret boyfriend?’

It’s not without challenges, at least for all

How different is it from single solo women travellers?

Thiruvananthapuram-based Sreedevi Jeevan wanted to go on a one-day trip to Munroe Thuruthu, Kollam, last year, but didn’t get any friends to accompany her.This got the 30-year-old content writer and mother of a three-year-old boy, thinking, “Why not take the trip alone?” Her family was a bit concerned, but she managed to convince them, researched well on the beautiful island and also zeroed in on a guide. The excited first-time solo traveller got into the train from Thiruvananthapuram at 6 am. But things didn’t go as smooth as she expected.“I was supposed to get down at Kollam and take a connection train to Munroe Thuruthu, but got into a train which was heading back to Thiruvananthapuram. I realised the folly only when I reached Varkala,” she recalls. Sreedevi immediately got down and called the guide. “He told me that was the only train to reach there in the morning and the next one is late in the evening!” she says. It was a moment when you would feel forced to drop the plan. But Sreedevi didn’t.“I decided I won’t back out at any cost. I took a bus from Varkala, and had to change two more buses to finally reach the island. It was afternoon by then, but I took it as a positive, adventurous twist to my first solo attempt!” she says.That was just the beginning of the love affair with solo trips for the married woman, who is now planning a trip to Vietnam or Cambodia. “My dream is to tour solo across the Europe but first, I wanted to prep myself through trips in Asia,” she exclaims.From a time when Kerala women went for leisure trips only with their husbands or families, to single girls in Kerala opting solo trips, we are now at a phase in which married Malayali women like Sreedevi are also bravely travelling solo, around the world.Paying no heed to parochial questions such as ‘OMG! Why aren’t you taking your husband along?’ and ‘How different it is when a married lady travels solo,’ these ladies are not afraid to tread a new path, literally, and we find out how:Anna Eden, the wife of Hibi Eden MLA, went on a solo trip to Japan last year. “It was a rejuvenating tour as it was different from our usual family trips. Being the mom of a four-year-old girl, travelling as a family doesn’t exempt me from responsibilities like feeding her on time, giving the right food and everything else you do at home.Sure I can see new places, but I can’t relax and this is true in the case of all mothers,” says Anna, who is also a law student.It was probably because of that, her husband urged her to go on a solo trip. “He was extremely supportive, so I went to Japan for a week, all by myself. I didn’t take a new SIM card and kept in touch with home only to inform my whereabouts through voice messages. It gave me the much required me time, for rejuvenation,” says Anna, adding that she is planning to go on such trips at least once a year.Funnily enough, when she returned, a mother of a student at her daughter’s school asked her, ‘Did you actually go with your boyfriend?’ hinting disapproval at her trip without husband’s company. “I gave her a fitting reply. What people need to understand is that it is about your choice. Some people might be competent to take care of everyone and also enjoy the travel alongside. I am not. I really needed that space and time, and I am glad I took it,” she explains.Deepa Ananthapadmanabhan, a traveller who runs a kindergarten in Thiruvananthapuram, says, “Interestingly, I have encountered the question ‘Why are you travelling without your husband?’ the most from women!”Deepa says she just tells them it’s her life and time to use it the way she pleases. “Fortunately, my family is supportive and I want to do more such trips,” says Deepa, who is the wife of ex-cricketer Ananthapadmanabhan.Sreedevi says that once married, women often end up side-lining their passions, skills and hobbies. “We need some personal time to analyse our capabilities, manage time and money independently, and even think a bit about ourselves. After I became a mom, I felt I was tied down with my unending chores, but solo trips gave the freedom I yearned,” she says.While many of these travellers opine that they face the same set of challenges any woman would, there are a few concerns that would only come up for a married traveller. Deepa, for instance, went on her first solo trip when her younger son was just 10 years old. “It was tough to get over the thoughts of my family and for around two days, I was constantly worried about how my sons are doing back home,” she recalls.However, Deepa says now she has made her kids independent enough to take care of themselves that if at all she is away on trips, she doesn’t have to worry about anything. “As a result, I am at peace during my trips,” she says.As for the travelling experience, she says, “You get the same share of ogles and stares. When you are out with a backpack, people give the ithaara doubtful look. It’s not even in terms of the vaainottam, but the thoughts like ‘Woman travelling around? What’s she up to?’ kind of curiosity,” she says.Pentagenerian Rini Martin, a homemaker from Kottayam who went on her first solo trip a few months ago to Bengaluru, says, “I used to travel alone quite a bit when I was a student but after marriage, I never got to do it. Once my kids went to college and I started getting bored at home, I decided to go on a solo trip, urged by my college friends.”All she wanted to do was visit Bengaluru where she studied, check out its new hotspots, enjoy her own company for a change and meet her old friends if possible. “But it took almost a year to convince my family. That was a bigger challenge than me garnering enough courage to travel alone after about 22 years,” she says, laughing.Most of the women travellers vouch for the support of their husbands! Media person Nidhi Sudhan, who has travelled solo both in India and abroad extensively, says, “My husband and I travel a lot, both with and without each other’s company. For instance, I had travelled with him to Greece a few years ago. I then visited the country again alone sometime ago. All he would ask is probably, ‘So where are you going today?’”Many of these travellers, like Nidhi, are meticulous planners when it comes to their trips. “I make sure that I know the place inside out, especially when it is outside India. I ensure that my accommodation, food and every other aspect is finalised before I set out,” she says.If you are not married, you probably have to just plan your budget or leaves at office, says Sreedevi. “But the responsibilities of a married woman are more. We have to think of everyone at home and ensure that in our absence, things will go smooth for them,” she says.A few like Rini also opine that married women travellers enjoy the experience a lot more than their single counterparts. “It’s a hard-earned holiday for us, as compared to the single women who can just pack their bags and leave. The waiting period, preparation and even the approval nod from families are extra sweet for all the challenges involved,” she says.