New York, NY—

In a short interview with People Magazine, President Donald Trump’s adult children explained that they thought Mr. Trump was a “great father,” and “possibly, the greatest father ever.”

Donald Jr. gushed. “My father had all the best fatherly traits. Both contemporary and classical fathering techniques. My wealthy New York upbringing was top-notch.”

Ivanka smiled wide. “My father instilled in me the most committed feminist values, and taught me that even though I was a woman, I could still look down upon people from a Manhattan penthouse.”

Eric wouldn’t look up from his Game Boy Advance to answer any questions because he was “on the final boss.”

It had a great humanizing effect, and everyone in the audience forgot for a moment that Mr. Trump is exactly the person all parents should strive to keep their kids from being like.

Also, Trump is on record multiple times boasting of his lack of involvement in the bringing up of his kids. Here’s one to get you started. It’s fun research.

(Picture courtesy of Disney ABC Television Group.)

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