When Hillary Rodham Clinton is involved, it's a question of "What do you want first, the bad news or the really bad news?"

Let's start with the worst bit of old news: over the last 5 years, your government has given $8 million to an affiliate of the Clinton Foundation, which is under FBI investigation for corruption.

The next bit of bad news is that they're getting $5.5 million more of your money in the next year. Don't worry too much though, it's all going to help cure diarrhea in Africa. Promise.

The Foundation is currently under investigation by the FBI over the way it obtained donations while Hillary Clinton was US Secretary of State – the same period in which the New Zealand Government began giving the initiative money. Taxpayers deserve confidence that aid commitments are made to help the world’s poor, not to win favours with foreign politicians. [...] This is the kind of nonsense that our Minister of Foreign Affairs Winston Peters prides himself on exposing and cutting out. - Taxpayers Union

Indeed, is Winston Peters asleep at the helm?

It's also a complete coincidence that Hillary is in New Zealand right now. The legacy media has been fawning over how she made a "surprise" visit, for a photo shoot, at a local baby shop to buy Jacinda a present. Aw. She met with Jacinda Ardern for an hour-long secret meeting and another photo shoot the next day.

How much money has her little pity tour cost us? Judging by figures we have from Mr Obama's visit, likely around… oh wait, according to MP Chris Hipkins, those costs are still being finalised, so we'll probably ever know. Bummer.

Before she continues on her tour of shame, she's giving a speech at the Vector Arena, moderated by former Prime Minister Jenny Shipley, for only $200-$300 a head. That's actually pretty cheap to listen to a Clinton speech, they must be discounting heavily. At the time that I write this, she hasn't given her speech yet, but it's probably about how the patriarchy cost her the election by making women vote for President Donald Trump. Here is an excerpt:

[...] an election marked by rage, sexism, exhilarating highs and infuriating lows, stranger-than-fiction twists, Russian interference, and an opponent who broke all the rules.

I didn't know Hillary was into comedic sketches, but there you go. It turns out you can teach an old dog new tricks.

NO MONEY FOR CROOKED HILLARY: Sign the petition to end taxpayer funding of the Clinton Foundation.