IT’S the biggest trade of the year: $7m for a kid who has barely played a game.

But what does Tom Boyd have to say about the deal?

Footy satirst Titus O’Reily got his hands on this open letter from the new Bulldogs recruit:

Dear Bulldogs fans

Today marked the end of my tour of duty of Western Sydney.

While I can’t unsee the things I’ve seen, the enormous amount of money your club has bestowed on me today does ease the pain somewhat.

My time at the AFL’s most indifferent outpost taught me that I wanted out of there.

I leave GWS with the knowledge that I’ve achieved everything I wanted to achieve up there.

Those nine games were tough but they’re in the past. I’ve proven myself at AFL level.

No longer will I have to play in front of crowds of 7000 people.

Next year, I’ll be playing in front of crowds almost double that size.

I don’t want to sound ungrateful, I’ll miss some of the young guys up there, but they’re all leaving in the next few years anyway. Especially now that I’ve shown them how.

Every Bulldogs supporter should know that I’m committed to the club for the next few years at least, let’s say seven for now.

The millions of dollars you guys are giving me is awesome, thanks!

When you buy that membership, you should feel good that you’re making a nineteen-year-old’s dreams come true.

Especially the dream of having an enormous amount of money.

Now it’s down to business.

I’m already working hard looking at coaching CVs. I’ll let you know as soon as I’ve picked one.

I’m not old enough to remember Terry Wallace from his coaching days. What do you guys think? His PowerPoint is amazing.

Be more bulldog

Tom Boyd

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Read more Titus at titusoreily.com or follow him on Twitter @TitusOReilly.