Father's Day was very likely a tense affair for Salt Lake City resident Baron Brooks, whose dad Arthur made a full-page, $900 personals newspaper ad for him without his permission. Not only that, but the ad makes Baron sound like a total jerk, too.

The ad, which appeared in an Idaho paper for reasons we'll get to in a moment, is written from Baron's point of view and states that he is looking for a wife who fits very specific criteria. Specifically, the ad calls for a woman "between the ages of 34-38," which is 10 years younger than Baron, and "height and weight proportional," which is basically like saying "no fat chicks."

The ad also expresses a preference for politically conservative women ("If you voted for Obama or plan to vote for Hillary you are not for me") who are "willing and able to have children as soon as possible," which is why Baron's dad put the ad in an Idaho paper; that state is pretty safely red for the time being.

Baron, as one might imagine, is totally mortified by his dad's machinations, especially now that they've gone viral and will ironically make it harder for him to find a soulmate, since most people think he wrote the ad himself.

Baron remains hopeful, though. "Who knows, it can't hurt," he said, regarding his father's plans to conduct wife applicant interviews at the Coeur d'Alene Resort in Idaho. "Who the hell knows?"

See the full ad below.