Now gentlemen, normally I don’t go for all that frou-frou daisies and perfume crap, but upon the behest of my lovely fiancé, I reluctantly threw my hat in the ring for the Reddit Awesome Smell Exchange because, well, you know, she’s into that whole roses and unicorns horse crap and I like her butt.

But then I thought, you know what? Eff it. In the words of the great duke of poon himself, Frank Sinatra, if I’m going to do this, I’ll do it my way. So I said, “dear exchange match, send me something that smells manly as shit.” And I’ll be damned if my match didn’t deliver.

So I get home from work today and what do I see? A completely manly brown box. And upon unwrapping said box, what do I find? A metric ASSTON of bubble wrap. Well, played sir; this will keep me entertained for hours.

Now, I know what you’re thinking. Those Yankee Candle women make a bunch of crap that smells like flowers and birthday cake. Well, you’re damn wrong. In fact, in the barely legible letter I received from match, they even said, “Seriously, it’s not all flowers and birthday cake.” What a broseidon.

In fact, those nancies at Yankee Candle have developed some of the manliest scents you’ll ever treat your sweet nose to. Just check out these fine examples of badassery: Balsam and Cedar, Beachwood, and Fireside: which smells like the moment when you and your honey are about to get it on in a secluded cabin in the woods, in case you're interested. They even included a match to light that shit up. What a bro.

Needless to say, the timing couldn’t have been crucial, as my Treehouse Memories candle (which smells like that time you and your bros built a secret fortress in the woods – no girls allowed) was dwindling into obscurity, meaning my man-cave was in serious danger of smelling like sweaty gym socks and ballsack.

So, thanks Reddit Smell Exchange buddy. You’re a true bro among bros. Time to go burn one.