(I answer a phone call from an obviously high customer.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Store]. Will this be for dine-in, take out, or delivery?”

Customer: “Do you guys have any specials?”

Me: “Yes, right now we have an extra-large pepperoni pizza for $12.99.”

Customer: “Woah! That’s a great stoner pizza! Wait, did I say that out loud?”

Me: “No, sir.”

Customer: “Awesome!”