According to some bullshit I made up, a youtube video that doesn’t exist, and a gross misinterpretation of peer reviewed research: the low pressures at high altitude combined with off-gasing chemicals in cockpits cause pilots to produce toxic amounts of intestinal gas. Historically, these emissions were used to warm up the meals for economy class passengers. The food would absorb the toxins leaving just harmless residue that would be circulated into the cabin air.

However, due to a recent FDA ruling, it is now illegal (Thanks a lot Obama!) to use intestinal gas as an agent for reheating food for human consumption. In response, airlines now pipe these fumes directly into the atmosphere. They hide the visible-frome-the-ground atmospheric residue under the guise of “contrails”, claiming that wings moving through the air can magically make clouds appear. Have you ever waved your hand through the air and seen a cloud follow it?

The public deserves to know! Tweet your congressmen and airlines and demand that they tell the full truth about fartrails!