Did you ever steal something from the Police station? In China?

I was escorted today from the last class before the lunch break by Chinese teacher and few uniformed and plain clothes cops. We walked toward near-by Police station, and got served with lunch at cops. Me and Chinese teacher.

I thought, I am just on regular review at Exit Entry police, since I am newcomer in my city in Guizhou. Clean air with city on 1800m elevation and rest of the things in first month all peachy.

After the lunch, me and Chinese teacher had to go to 'Processing room'. Cop-she-translator asked me in horrible English, if I desire Police inform my Embassy. Me: 'I don't mind. If you think, that's necessary, I have Bj's Embassy phone number.?' She: 'These are rights!'

Then, translator asked me, what is my phone no. Three cops were filling-up some forms over the puter. I stood-up off the fake leather sofa, and reached to the pocket for my Nokia. Cop showed me to sit back on fake leather...OK, with my phone in hand looking for my ph.no. Cop: 'Are you nervous?' Me: 'No, why?'

Then, Chinese teacher and me nap. Cops were filling up endless forms, and we just snoozed. Time was around 3:40pm, when translator-cop-she brought all filled forms (some 40 pages), and started translating to English, what was written on forms with 'we asked you this...' and 'you replied that...'

Coppers wanted to know things about 'when did I start to work', 'did I sign Contract with employer', 'when did I arrive to the city' and similar. When cop asked me: 'What is your salary?', I had first suspicious thought: 'Why would Exit-Entry police want to know my salary.....?'

Of course, I didn't tell them. My salary is high.... Cop was arguing, 'how I can't remember my salary?' and 'you didn't get paid yet?' Me: 'No, I didn't get paid yet, because I didn't complete 30-days of working, so I really don't know my salary.' ---> 'defense lawyer by birth'.

I had to sign all 40 pages twice, top and bottom. After I was done, she offered me red ink dish to ink dates and more with my red thumb print. 5 thumb prints on every page on average. Maybe more.

I was done at around 4:10pm, required to remain sitting on the fake sofa.

Cop didn't offer tissue to clean my still wet red thumb digit, what I found it very rude. I stood-up, and walked toward copper and offered her my hand for shake with: 'You need an English teacher! I can teach all cops in the city proper English.' In the same time, I wiped my red finger to her hand, so we were both red now.

Then, owner of the School arrived, and talked to the coppers in Chinese.

Cop translator told me: 'Nothing is wrong! You can go now!'

Apparently, guard at my apartment's entrance reported me to Police. Police sent cop in regular clothes with camera to the School few days ago. I thought, he was School's employee taking pics for the School's Board, but later I saw him in uniform at copper-house, handling endless forms.

Translator-she handed me earlier stack of printer paper, so my thumb print would be clearer by pressing on harder surface.

I walked out of cops with stack of police printer paper and one of their pens. Mastards!

'add-it': since we get brazillion hits on my sneaky Q, I'll add something very quick: 'my place is looking for 2 more FTs. If anybody is jobless, PM me and I'll contact you with my boss. Decent Private School.'