Listen, we need to have a talk. And yes, it's The Talk. Actually, it's not even a talk, it's more just us telling you what we want and expect from you, and it's to be watching The Real Housewives of Dallas.

The Bravo reality it ON FIRE in its second season, and you are basically spitting in the eyes of Andy Cohen the TV gods by not watching. "But I already watch too many shows!" you are probably whining right now. Or maybe you are saying, "I watch New York City, Orange County, Atlanta and New Jersey, how much more do I have to give to these women?!" The answer is another 42 minutes of gold, because that's what RHOD is.

If you aren't convinced just yet, may we present to you this exclusive sneak peek at the rest of the drama heading your way on Dallas this season, which includes dildos, multiple threats of violence, and arguably the best anti-hero currently on TV: LeeAnne Locken.