There’s a lot of contradiction in Illuminati theories. The more you read about it, the less it makes sense. There is no through-line. As Max Read wrote , Illuminati theories are basically introduced by all kinds of crazy people to help explain “why things aren’t going their way.”

But there’s a flip side to it, as well. Many in the hip-hop community (or at least, people who want to belong to the hip-hop community) believe in the existence of the Illuminati, as well, and claim right wingers like Glenn Beck — the very people who spin these Illuminati conspiracy theories — are actually running the secret society. They believe the Illuminati is responsible for the deaths of Michael Jackson, Tupac, Biggie, and practically every other dead rapper or musician of the last 20 years, which basically leaves Jay-Z. Why isn’t he dead? Because he joined forces with the Illuminati! Jay-Z is responsible for those deaths, and he is spreading the Illuminati message through his music, his music videos, his clothing line, and through his wife, Beyonce. El-Amini probably wanted to sacrifice his friend as an easy pathway to success. He was willing to sell his soul to the Alex Jones types in order to gain success in the music industry, just as he believes Jay-Z did.

I’ve been doing a lot of research on the Illuminati over the past few days, and aside from the completely insane theories proffered by nutters, there is almost nothing to suggest that the Illuminati actually exists. It did exist in the 18th century, as a secret organization designed to “oppose superstition, prejudice, religious influence over public life, abuses of state power, and to support women’s education and gender equality,” but there’s very little evidence to suggest that such an organization exists today, at least in numbers enough to matter. It’s a fake entity people like Mark Dice claim exist to explain changes in culture (or what many of us call “progress”). Conspiracy theorist cite the Illuminati’s influence in contributing to our culture’s “extreme materialism, spiritual vacuosity and a self-centered, individualistic existence,” which is anti-Illuminati code for godlessness, gender equality, gay rights, and liberalism.

What was particularly unusual about the story is that El-Amini, the aspiring rapper who attempted to shoot his friend in the head, is the rare person — aside from conspiracy theorists and nutters — to acknowledge the existence of the modern Illuminati. Of course, El-Amini was high, and has put forth no evidence that the Illuminati actually exists, but his trial — scheduled for June — will not only explore the existence of the Illuminati, but will delve into the notion the Illuminati has control over the success of some performers. That portion of the trial should take about 15 seconds.

Yesterday, The Smoking Section reported on a story in which an aspiring rapper had attempted to take the life of a friend as a blood sacrifice in order to join the Illuminati, a secret society that purportedly has a huge influence on world events and is particularly influential in the music industry, more specifically hip hop.

I DON’T THINK TAMMIN SURSOK WOULD JUST RANDOMLY SEARCH ILLUMINATI UP ON TWITTER AND RETWEET A RANDOM QUOTE. THERE IS A REASON WHY SHE RETWEETED IT FOR A CERTAIN REASON. SHE SEEN THE SCREENCAP HERSELF BECAUSE OTHER PEOPLE TOLD HER. SUCH AS FROM OTHER CAST MEMBERS, CREW MEMBERS, PRODUCERS/DIRECTORS, FANS, THEIR FRIENDS, OR EVEN POSSIBLY FROM FAMILY MEMBERS. SHE UNDERSTOOD WHAT THEY’VE GONE THROUGH WITH THEIR LIVES AND THEIR CAREERS SO SHE RETWEETED THAT TWEET BECAUSE THAT’S WHAT THEY’VE BEEN GOING THROUGH AND THAT’S WHAT THEY HAVE TO DO TO GET TO ANOTHER LEVEL. Why would Tammin Sursok retweet this illuminati quote? Because Shay Mitchell and Ashley Benson made mistakes and relating to the quote “Errors are stepping stones that will take you from where you are to where you want to be”.

How does that Retweet relate to the DM conversation. This person clearly has the answer:

This is the DM message to which he refers, an exchange between “Pretty Little Liars” cast members, Ashley Benson and Shay Mitchell.

I’ll be honest. I’m having a hell of a time making sense of this, but the genesis for this post came from a comment left by a guy named Keegan Allen on UPROXX’s Facebook page.

But there are some FANTASTICALLY insane theories. Many of them revolve around Jay-Z and Beyonce, and you’d have to have been squirreled away under a rock earlier this year — during Beyonce’s Super Bowl performance, specifically — to have avoided hearing about them. Ignoring the conspiracy theories surrounding Jay-Z and Beyonce specifically (which could fill an entire 1,500 page novel), here are the The Craziest, Most Insane Conspiracy Theories I ran across this week, including Blue Ivy, the daughter of Jay-Z and Beyonce.

Indeed, Illuminati conspiracy theorists are able to find evidence that almost anyone belongs to the Illuminati if they look hard enough. If you cover one eye with your hair? You’re in the Illuminati. Flash a certain sign? Illuminati. Inadvertently expose your genitalia to the paparazzi? Illuminati. Some people, like Jay-Z, actually play into the conspiracy theories: It creates a sense of mystery. It helps to sell records. And it provides a lot of material for rap lyrics. That’s fine, too — it’s all part of being an entertainer — until someone like El-Amini tries to shoot his friend in the face to be a part of an organization that doesn’t exist.

Basically meaning that they must make “Errors” meaning doing evil/bad things and making mistakes in their life that the good people do not find acceptable. Such as rituals, sacrifices, continuing the agenda for new world order, promoting satanism in their life, in their photos, and in their TV show for the illuminati to rise in the ranks in Freemasonry. And “stepping stones” meaning to take another step up through each Freemason degree so they can obtain more fame, money, authority, and become more acknowledged in their industry.

Whaaaaaa? And how does Boy Meets World’s Danielle Fishel tie into all of this? I have NO idea, except that Keegan Allen says that she is “involved in the situation.” This is how the mind of a Illuminati conspiracy theorists works, I suppose. Here’s Topanga on the phone with Satan, obviously.

Taylor Swift

Swift has not only had made her Illuminati beliefs known during several performances, but the confrontation between her and Kanye West — who was manipulated by Beyonce, who was manipulated by Jay-Z — at the Grammys was completely staged in service of the New World Order.

Kanye: big bad out of control, angry Black guy hurts innocent virginesque Taylor. Crowd is outraged. Emotions run high. Security is ordered to boot Kanye (by those in the know and Kanye is also in the know). Final curtain call: pontificate, with a compassion worthy of Quan-Yin, almost reminiscent of yesteryear’s Deus ex-Machina, Beyonce sacrifices her grand talented self in her ultimate moment of altruistic selflessness and becomes the quintessential Black goddess as she bestows her time back upon the innocent “child”, aka Taylor Swift. The crowd goes wild. Injustice had been created and in an instant, she restored the peace and now Justice has been served and in the process major catharsis has been achieved on a global level! We all felt good at the end, didn’t we? All those of us who have been outraged by Michael Jackson’s death and the way he has been exploited transferred those outraged feelings onto Taylor (the new “victim”) and the instant Beyonce so “graciously” and “selflessly” conceded her time to her, she became the Angel of Justice and bestowed upon us the catharsis (that is to say, the relief of our all our anger and outrage via righteous retribution & goodness prevailing once again) we haven’t experienced, and are not likely to feel any time soon when it comes to Michael Jackson’s mistreatment by the press. This was huge and a carefully orchestrated moment by near-genuises!!! Too bad they only use their brains for profit! Beyonce didn’t mind sacrificing her moment, she had a much bigger role to play: all glory and credit go to her, none of us knowing that she was the *evil* (wink, wink there is NO illuminati) mastermind behind the hurting of Taylor Swift in the first place.

The Illuminati Killed Whitney Houston as a Sacrifice for Beyonce’s Child, Blue Ivy

From Nairaland.com:

The occult point to the numerology of Houston’s passing. “Do you think its [sic] ironik [sic] she died in 2012 at the age of 48, 4 + 8 = 12!!! Illuminati like to do these sorts of things as a death ritual as they believe everything has to be done on a certain day.” Some are saying the 11th is an occult date, with other famous people like Bob Marley, Alexander McQueen and Sylvia Plath dying on that day. Nicki Minaj’s outfit to the 2012 Grammys had a face embroidered on the skirt in black beads. Conspiracy theorists think this was Whitney Houston’s. Blue Ivy needed a blood sacrifice.

Of course, Blue Ivy’s name apparently only supports that theory. From TopSecretWriters:

“Ivy” apparently refers to “I-lluminati’s V-ery Y-oungest”, and Blue means “B-orn L-iving U-nder E-vil”. Apparently, a few folks even spelled her name backwards – Eulb Yvi – which is apparently Latin for “Lucifer’s Daughter.”

Aha!

Dave Chappelle

Though he didn’t mention the Illuminati by name, Chappelle referred to the “sick environment” in Hollywood that led to Martin Lawrence’s meltdown and stroke. Conspiracy theorists believe that “sick environment” is code for the Illuminati. Apparently, Chappelle himself was forced out of the business because the $50 million contract he was offered by Comedy Central came with an important string attached: Ritual sodomy. Katt Williams also refused to be sodomized, which is why his career spiraled.

Anne Hathaway

According to this site, Anne Hathaway’s decision to expose her breasts in a couple of film roles was an Illuminati ritual that led to the shootings in Aurora, Colorado during a The Dark Knight screening. When Anne Hathaway unwittingly revealing her vagina to paparazzi last year, that was a coded message that led to the Newton, CT shootings. She was rewarded with an Oscar.

Keanu Reeves

The death of Keanu Reeves’ girlfriend in a car accident was a blood sacrifice to appease The Illuminati. His movie, Constantine, was apparently Illuminati propaganda.

Heath Ledger Was Killed by the Illuminati

The last movie that Heath Ledger made, The Imaginarium of Dr. Parnassus, apparently contained “obvious” Illuminati imagery, and according to Randy Quaid, Hollywood insiders — or the Illuminati — killed Heath Ledger. Moreover, a leading Illuminati promoter, Jack Nicholson, had warned Ledger beforehand. Quaid also believes these “Hollywood Insiders” or “star whackers” (or Illuminati) control the banking system, had David Carradine and Chris Penn killed, and is targeting him, which is why he fled to Canada.

River Phoenix Was Made a Blood Sacrifice by the Illuminati

From Media Exposed:

River Phoenix overdosed, mysteriously died on Halloween Night. (Blood Sacrifice). River Phoenix violated the cult’s stricture of secrecy by discussing his early sexuality with reporters. He was killed to prevent talking out about the cult.

Joaquin Phoenix Forewarned The End of the World Via ‘Boy Meets World’

Joaquin is apparently still a member of the New World Order — a Monarch Slave sold into the Illuminati by his family — and as such, apparently has some inside information about the end of the world. He posted this final scene of Boy Meets World on his Facebook fan page as a forewarning. It’s a cleverly coded farewell.

Walt Disney

Walt Disney was a leading figure of the Illuminati, and used his empire to disseminate his Satanic messages (Mickey Mouse was modeled after his likeness). Walt Disney’s interest in children was not altruistic; he was a pedophile, a lover snuff porn films, and he uses Illuminati symbols to control the minds of children and indoctrinate them into his Occult.

Miley Cyrus

Cyrus is just one of many “sex kittens” created by the Disney empire to control children. She may or may not know she is being controlled by the Illuminati, but it’s clear from the reversed messages in her music that she is spreading evil. Played backwards, it’s OBVIOUS one of her songs says, “Feel more horny. You’re horny see. You hoes better listen. You also eat pu**y molester. God it’s sweet.”

There’s an entire, lengthy, incoherent post here about Miley’s sex-slave status, and how her twinning plays into the Illuminati. The level of crazy in that post borders on sociopathic. Selena Gomez has also apparently been preprogrammed by the Illuminati.

Justin Bieber

So, Bieber’s paternal grandparents are German immigrants and the Ashkenazi surname “Bieber” is original from Bavaria, “the original crib of the modern Illuminati“:

First found in Bavaria, where the name Bieber was closely identified in early mediaeval times with the feudal society of early European history. The name would later emerge as a noble family with great influence, having many distinguished branches, and become noted for its involvement in social, economic and political affairs.

Bieber also recently got a tattoo of the “Owl of Moloch,” which can also be seen on the dollar bill and was a god worshipped by the Phoenicians and Canaanites that had associations with a particular kind of child sacrifice by parents.

Kristin Stewart Sexually Initiated by Jodie Foster

According to Hollywood Illumaniti, Jodie Foster — who attends the lesbian occult rituals up in Belgium along with Hillary Clinton (who is also part French) and Ellen DeGeneres (yet another French Illuminati Sorceress) locked Kristen Stewart up her her home for days:

due to being possessed by a female demon (lillith in Jewish texts but Aradia in Pagan-Celtic), while Jodie Foster used a sexual device on her, in order to initiate Kristen Stewart into the click. This event took place a few months before Jodie Foster and Kristen Stewart started filming the Panic Room Film and it was arranged by the Hollywood Studio System. Using a sexual device aka dildo on a virgin girl is not uncommon in the occult, in fact even in Wiccan Initiation this type of ritual takes place.

The Film Cruel Intentions Is a Blueprint for Illuminati Indoctrination

Again, from Hollywood Illuminati: