In a surprising story out of Braintree, MA, it has been reported that Laura D’Amico’s coworker Abby is actually pretty cool on the low?

“I guess we’d never hung out outside of work,” said Laura. “But we were all a little drunk at our company retreat, and it turns out she’s really funny and super chill to be around. What the hell?”

Laura went on to break down just how secretly rad Abby is.

“I mean, besides the fact that she tells hilarious jokes and wears stylish outfits in the office, she’s in a band. Like, she’s the singer in a rock band,” said Laura. “And she fosters pitbulls! She comes off as so regular at work, but she’s literally the coolest person in her regular life?”

“I’m actually pissed we weren’t already friends,” she added.

Abby Loughlin, the clandestinely awesome coworker in question, is modest about the whole thing.

“Of course I have, like, hobbies and interests besides my work,” she said. “I have my community garden plot, my cycling group, and my band. My life would be so boring if I were just an accountant. I’d never wanna be one of those people whose whole personality is their job.”

“Unfortunately, that’s what the rest of my coworkers are like,” Abby added. “So I don’t really share the other aspects of my life with them. I wouldn’t want any of them to think I want to be friends outside of the office.”

But Laura, now Abby’s biggest fan, is none the wiser.

“Damn, it’s so hard to make friends as an adult, especially woman friends,” she said. “I’m really psyched that Abby is lowkey sick. Maybe we can make that transition.”

“We’ll have to keep it quiet, though,” Laura added. “I wouldn’t want any of my other boring-ass coworkers to think I want to be friends outside of the office.”