(CNN) Kathleen Rodgers remembers when her 22-year-old son called to tell her he'd enlisted in the Army. Then a junior in college in Texas, he was kind, but firm.

"Mom, I'm 22. I can make decisions for myself," he told her.

By the time he was deployed to Afghanistan in 2014, there was nothing that would have stopped him from wanting to go to war. One of his roommates in officer candidate school had gone, and been killed in action.

U.S. Army flight medic Brandon Lowther, left, holds hands with a fatally wounded U.S. soldier who is being airlifted on August 24, 2011. With 71 casualties, August was the deadliest month for U.S. forces in Afghanistan since the conflict began.

10 years of war in Afghanistan – U.S. Army flight medic Brandon Lowther, left, holds hands with a fatally wounded U.S. soldier who is being airlifted on August 24, 2011. With 71 casualties, August was the deadliest month for U.S. forces in Afghanistan since the conflict began.

Nicole Merkt greets her husband, Spc. Jake Merkt, from his return from Afghanistan during a welcome home celebration in Carson, Colorado, on July 9, 2011. In June, President Obama announced that all of the 33,000 additional U.S. forces deployed to Afghanistan in December 2009 will return home within 15 months. He also announced that U.S. combat operations in Afghanistan would end by 2014.

10 years of war in Afghanistan – Nicole Merkt greets her husband, Spc. Jake Merkt, from his return from Afghanistan during a welcome home celebration in Carson, Colorado, on July 9, 2011. In June, President Obama announced that all of the 33,000 additional U.S. forces deployed to Afghanistan in December 2009 will return home within 15 months. He also announced that U.S. combat operations in Afghanistan would end by 2014.

President Obama, along with members of the national security team, watch in anticipation in the Situation Room of the White House on May 1, 2011. On May 2, in the early morning hours, a small group of U.S. Forces raid a compound in Abbottabad, Pakistan. In the ensuing firefight, al Qaeda leader Osama bin Laden is killed.

10 years of war in Afghanistan – President Obama, along with members of the national security team, watch in anticipation in the Situation Room of the White House on May 1, 2011. On May 2, in the early morning hours, a small group of U.S. Forces raid a compound in Abbottabad, Pakistan. In the ensuing firefight, al Qaeda leader Osama bin Laden is killed.

President Barack Obama visits with troops at Bagram Air Base on March 28, 2010. Obama thanked the Afghan people and U.S. troops for their sacrifices and vowed to reverse the Taliban's momentum. It was his first visit to Afghanistan as president.

10 years of war in Afghanistan – President Barack Obama visits with troops at Bagram Air Base on March 28, 2010. Obama thanked the Afghan people and U.S. troops for their sacrifices and vowed to reverse the Taliban's momentum. It was his first visit to Afghanistan as president.

U.S. Marines jump over a wall in a poppy field under heavy fire in a Taliban stronghold area in northern Marjah on March 25, 2010. Afghan poppies, which start as flowers in farmers' fields and often wind up as heroin on U.S. streets, fuel a $3 billion a year industry in Afghanistan.

10 years of war in Afghanistan – U.S. Marines jump over a wall in a poppy field under heavy fire in a Taliban stronghold area in northern Marjah on March 25, 2010. Afghan poppies, which start as flowers in farmers' fields and often wind up as heroin on U.S. streets, fuel a $3 billion a year industry in Afghanistan.

President Karzai prepares to kiss a large copy the Quran during his swearing-in ceremony in Kabul on November 19, 2009. He was elected to a second term by default when Foreign Minister Abdullah Abdullah dropped out of the race and the run-off election was canceled.

10 years of war in Afghanistan – President Karzai prepares to kiss a large copy the Quran during his swearing-in ceremony in Kabul on November 19, 2009. He was elected to a second term by default when Foreign Minister Abdullah Abdullah dropped out of the race and the run-off election was canceled.

Afghan men cast their votes at a polling station in Kabul on August 20, 2009, during the country's second democratic election. Voting fraud allegations lead to the scheduling of a presidential runoff vote on November 7.

10 years of war in Afghanistan – Afghan men cast their votes at a polling station in Kabul on August 20, 2009, during the country's second democratic election. Voting fraud allegations lead to the scheduling of a presidential runoff vote on November 7.

A U.S. counter-intelligence Marine and his translator meet with local Afghan villagers on March 23, 2009, in Kirta, a remote area of southwest Afghanistan. Troops rely on information from local residents, many of whom are opium poppy farmers, to help thwart Taliban attacks.

10 years of war in Afghanistan – A U.S. counter-intelligence Marine and his translator meet with local Afghan villagers on March 23, 2009, in Kirta, a remote area of southwest Afghanistan. Troops rely on information from local residents, many of whom are opium poppy farmers, to help thwart Taliban attacks.

President Bush speaks to troops during an unannounced visit to Bagram Air Base in Afghanistan on December 15, 2008. It was his second and last visit as president.

10 years of war in Afghanistan – President Bush speaks to troops during an unannounced visit to Bagram Air Base in Afghanistan on December 15, 2008. It was his second and last visit as president.

Afghan elders of the Korengal Valley arrive for a meeting with U.S. and Afghan military officials on October 30, 2008, in eastern Afghanistan. The officials tried to convince them to accept a new paved road through the valley as part of a large American development project. The elders refused.

10 years of war in Afghanistan – Afghan elders of the Korengal Valley arrive for a meeting with U.S. and Afghan military officials on October 30, 2008, in eastern Afghanistan. The officials tried to convince them to accept a new paved road through the valley as part of a large American development project. The elders refused.

Artilerymen await coordinates before firing a 155-mm Howlitzer from Camp Blessing in the Kunar province of eastern Afghanistan on October 22, 2008. Their unit, Charlie Battery, 3rd Battalion of the 321 Field Artilery, is the busiest artilery unit in the U.S. Army, according to military officers.

10 years of war in Afghanistan – Artilerymen await coordinates before firing a 155-mm Howlitzer from Camp Blessing in the Kunar province of eastern Afghanistan on October 22, 2008. Their unit, Charlie Battery, 3rd Battalion of the 321 Field Artilery, is the busiest artilery unit in the U.S. Army, according to military officers.

A solider looks on as C-117 plane drops food, water and other supplies onto a landing zone at an undisclosed location in the Ghazni province on May 29, 2007.

10 years of war in Afghanistan – A solider looks on as C-117 plane drops food, water and other supplies onto a landing zone at an undisclosed location in the Ghazni province on May 29, 2007.

U.S. soldiers disembark from a Chinook helicopter in the Ghazni province of Afghanistan on May 28, 2007. President Bush called on NATO in February 2007 to increase troops in Afghanistan. There were already about 50,000 U.S. and NATO troops there.

10 years of war in Afghanistan – U.S. soldiers disembark from a Chinook helicopter in the Ghazni province of Afghanistan on May 28, 2007. President Bush called on NATO in February 2007 to increase troops in Afghanistan. There were already about 50,000 U.S. and NATO troops there.

An Afghan soldier accompanies CNN's Anderson Cooper on September 9, 2006, during a visit to Jalalabad, the site of Osama bin Laden's former compound.

10 years of war in Afghanistan – An Afghan soldier accompanies CNN's Anderson Cooper on September 9, 2006, during a visit to Jalalabad, the site of Osama bin Laden's former compound.

Suicide car bombers kill an Afghan citizen and wound four others in Kabul on November 14, 2005. Another suicide car bomber killed a German soldier and wounded two other German soldiers, as well as three civilians, an hour before.

10 years of war in Afghanistan – Suicide car bombers kill an Afghan citizen and wound four others in Kabul on November 14, 2005. Another suicide car bomber killed a German soldier and wounded two other German soldiers, as well as three civilians, an hour before.

Election officials count ballots in Kabul, Afghanistan, on October 14, 2004. The country's first democratic election was held on October 9, and Hamid Karzai was sworn in as president in December.

10 years of war in Afghanistan – Election officials count ballots in Kabul, Afghanistan, on October 14, 2004. The country's first democratic election was held on October 9, and Hamid Karzai was sworn in as president in December.

Explosives that were hidden in a handcart lay on the ground in Kabul on July 3, 2004. In an effort to foil the country's first presidential election, the Taliban swapped broader offensives for homemade bombs and guerrilla warfare techniques.

10 years of war in Afghanistan – Explosives that were hidden in a handcart lay on the ground in Kabul on July 3, 2004. In an effort to foil the country's first presidential election, the Taliban swapped broader offensives for homemade bombs and guerrilla warfare techniques.

Afghan militiamen stand with a rocket launcher during a disarmament ceremony in Gardez on November 13, 2003. About 600 militiamen turned in their guns during the disarmament program.

10 years of war in Afghanistan – Afghan militiamen stand with a rocket launcher during a disarmament ceremony in Gardez on November 13, 2003. About 600 militiamen turned in their guns during the disarmament program.

Afghan protesters chant against the U.S. during an anti-America demonstration in Kabul on May 24, 2003.

10 years of war in Afghanistan – Afghan protesters chant against the U.S. during an anti-America demonstration in Kabul on May 24, 2003.

U.S. Army Lt. Col. Ed Dorman teaches an English class near the Bagram Air Base on April 20, 2002. As the base commander, Dorman decided to teach English to the local students to empower them to educate themselves.

10 years of war in Afghanistan – U.S. Army Lt. Col. Ed Dorman teaches an English class near the Bagram Air Base on April 20, 2002. As the base commander, Dorman decided to teach English to the local students to empower them to educate themselves.

Northern Alliance soldiers maintain radio contact from a dug-in tank position in Oykhonum, Northern Afghanistan, on November 9, 2001. The opposition forces had been fighting the larger Taliban militias for several years before the U.S. airstrikes began.

10 years of war in Afghanistan – Northern Alliance soldiers maintain radio contact from a dug-in tank position in Oykhonum, Northern Afghanistan, on November 9, 2001. The opposition forces had been fighting the larger Taliban militias for several years before the U.S. airstrikes began.

President George W. Bush responds to media questions in the East Room of the White House on October 11, 2001. It was his first prime-time press conference addressing the U.S. response to the 9/11 attacks.

10 years of war in Afghanistan – President George W. Bush responds to media questions in the East Room of the White House on October 11, 2001. It was his first prime-time press conference addressing the U.S. response to the 9/11 attacks.

The U.S.-led war in Afghanistan started on October 7, 2001, in response to the 9/11 attacks. Ten years later, look back at some of the moments and key development from the conflict, which has drawn praise and criticism since its beginning.

10 years of war in Afghanistan – The U.S.-led war in Afghanistan started on October 7, 2001, in response to the 9/11 attacks. Ten years later, look back at some of the moments and key development from the conflict, which has drawn praise and criticism since its beginning.

His deployment was relatively short -- four months, his mother said, due the drawdown of troops from Afghanistan. When he returned home, he joined the U.S. Army Reserve.

On Thursday, Rodgers was trying to gather her thoughts and emotions after President Barack Obama announced that the plan to bring all troops home had changed and troops would remain in the country past a previously set deadline.

Her son helped train Afghan soldiers in 2014. He could conceivably be redeployed.

"Is it going to be the same old, same old?" Kathleen Rodgers asked, wanting to hear more details. "Will they try something different?"

Her husband is a retired Air Force fighter pilot. The couple have years of experience shouldering the emotional demands made on military families.

But experience doesn't make it easier. Rodgers and other relatives worry that continuing what seems like a forever war will bring too much strain on an already-stressed military community.

"We both lived in crippling fear every second of every day that the notification team would show up on our doorstep and change our lives forever," Rodgers said. "I can't imagine experiencing that again."

Budgets cuts, yet more war

The new plan will keep thousands of troops in Afghanistan until the end of Obama's term in office. The current force, 9,800 troops, will remain through most of 2016 and then drop to 5,500 at the end of next year or early 2017. Their mission is the same: train and support Afghan security forces and carry out counterterrorism operations.

Some relatives said they were worried about the effects of sequestration , a recent series of automatic, across-the-board cuts to government agencies, including the Defense Department. Those cuts have included troop levels. In July, for example, the Army announced a force reduction of 40,000 service members.

Sequestration has led to putting family aid programs on the chopping block, according to Army wife Amy Bushatz. She is the managing editor of Military.com

One of those family programs is a chaplain-run, weekend-long, marriage retreat. It's hugely popular among couples, especially those who've endured multiple deployments.

In 2014, CNN examined indepth the struggles of military spouses who had attempted or contemplated suicide under such a strain.

Bushatz is married to an Army captain who fought in Afghanistan in 2009. His unit experienced heavy losses, she said.

"That is something that really sticks with you," she said. "It's not something you ever get over."

"We've been at war for 14 years," she said. "We're exhausted."

Relatives are so spent, she said, that newly married spouses just beginning to understand what it means to be engaged in a war as long as the one in Afghanistan are experiencing "infectious exhaustion."

"Years ago, when a new spouse moved into a housing area and met us there would have been an enthusiasm, a sense of pride about all the things that are great about being in the military," Bushatz said. "Now I think they are just seeing very tired people."

If not this option, what?

No relative CNN spoke with argues that families have been stretched, often through redeployments.

But Angela McCormick Ricketts asked: What other option is there?

"We have 14 years of blood, sweat and tears in that country," she said. "Do we want to see it fall into the hands of terrorists? I applaud Obama for listening to his commanders on the ground. He listened to Gen. [John] Campbell."

In early October, the top commander of U.S. forces in Afghanistan told the Senate Armed Services Committee that there must be "different options" than ones in place to maintain security in the country. Campbell noted the strengthening of ISIS and "increased al Qaeda presence" as well as an "upsurge" in enemy violence in some areas of Afghanistan.

Ricketts' husband, a former Army officer, served three tours in Afghanistan, one in Iraq, one in Somalia in the early 1990s and three in the Balkans. He recently left the service.

"I hate to say that we're [as military families] stoic and hard," she said. "But it's our battle. It's what we do. After 14 years we've really mastered how to dance this dance. It's the same guys who go over and over again."

Yes, she said, it's hard to say goodbye. It's hard to adjust to their return, she said, to begin again when you're both a little bit different, usually more distanced from each other emotionally.

But making sure the gains made in Afghanistan aren't lost is more important, Ricketts believes.

Letting the country slide back into Taliban control would be an insult to all the service members who died or who returned home and now must live with tremendous mental and physical injury, she said.

"We're a culture that takes care of our own," Ricketts continued. "And that's what we'll do."

The wife of a Special Forces member agreed. She's unable to provide her name because of her husband's job. He's spent about 40 months in Afghanistan, primarily in the southern part of the country, where fighting has tended to be most frequent.

The announcement that troops would not be withdrawn on the timetable the Obama administration previously set "didn't even register" with her or likely any family in the Special Forces community. "We've been extremely aware we were nowhere near finished with this war," she said.

She described the friends she and her husband know who are in Afghanistan now, and the ones who have recently returned -- either wounded or in caskets.

"If anything, I'm glad to see President Obama saying what we know is true, what we've known for a long time is true," she said. "Things are getting worse is Afghanistan. It's disheartening when I think about how much my life, my husband's life, my children's lives, have been impacted by that country. But feeling that way doesn't change anything. Either we commit now on a real level or we go home. There should be nothing in between."