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Colorism. It happens everywhere. But in India, it can happen a lot. Dark skin is viewed as an affliction and society is quick to endorse (and encash) the ideology. But hopefully, all that is changing. Celebrities like Heems,(@HIMANSHU) Himanshu Suri (video for “Sometimes,” ), Award winning actor Nandita Das ( @nanditadas) and more recently the 2014 Miss America Nina Davuluri (@Nina Davuluri) have actively taken up the ‘Unfair’ cause. In fact there has been a whole movement against celebrity endorsement of Fairness/ Skin Whitening Creams and Bollywood celebrities like Priyanka Chopra & Freida Pinto have voiced their disdain on the mothballed mindset.

We still have a long way to go. Fairness creams are a huge industry. Just have a look at how many there are on Amazon:





Here is a inspirational story of an Indian girl in the USA. And how she found resolution and comfort in her own skin

I Am Dark-Skinned…So What??!!!

‘I was on my way to my friend’s graduation on the subway. I g found an empty seat next to a Caucasian guy and sat down. I was busy checking messages on my phone when at the next stop an African American man got in, looked at me and got FURIOUS. He charged towards me yelling “You’re BLACK, you’re Eritrean, why are you dressed so nice, why are you with him, YOU’RE NASTY”…And he raised his hand and flung it straight at me! It was totally unexpected and had it not been for the guy next to me who protected me, I would have been badly hit. Stunned, all I could do was yell “NO! GO AWAY!” Some passengers also joined in so he walked away, still yelling the whole time. “She’s dressed nice but she’s ugly, NASTY. She’s black, she’s a black slut!”



Fairness creams like this one propagate the feeling that dark skin is something to be ashamed of.

Some passengers asked whether I was OK. I pretended I was, although I was still reeling from the attempted onslaught. I looked around-everyone was immersed in their own thoughts not wanting to get involved. I was still shaking inwardly and tears were brimming when I asked the Caucasian guy next to me where he was going to get off. He said he had to get off at the next stop and luckily I had to do the same because I needed to change trains. The Attacker was still in the train now just a few seats behind us, quiet now but I could see him looking at me through the reflection in the windows.

At the next stop, I got up right when the doors opened so that the Attacker wouldn’t have enough time to follow me. We got out and, as suspected, he started coming towards the doors. The guy who protected me stood right outside the doors staring at him and the Attacker came all the way to the doors, saw him, but didn’t get out. The doors shut and train left the station.

I gave the guy a big hug. “Thank you for doing that, seriously”. He said “I’m sorry we couldn’t do more. That was really terrible”. He asked if I needed anything. I said I was ok and he said he had to run. He left and I sat down at the station and cried my eyes out.

I hated myself for not saying anything. I hated being the silent victim who had a couple of tears in her eyes while the Attacker watched. I hated that I was uncontrollably bawling when I was alone. I wasn’t crying because of what he did, I was mad at me. I think I know why. Ever since I can remember, I’ve been ridiculed for having dark skin. One of my first memories of school is when I bit the girl next to me, because she said that if I was so dark, my mom must be so ugly. I’ve had teachers tell me that I couldn’t be in the dance because the costumes wouldn’t look good on me. My relatives would bring fairness creams as gifts for me. They would tell my mom that she’s a bad mother and she shouldn’t let me play sports because I was already so dark and it would only make me uglier (in my presence). I’ve heard insults every single day of my life when I was in India, and I wish this was an exaggeration.

But I was taught to remain silent. I was taught to not engage with them, because that would encourage them. So I always hung my head low and ignored all the insults. I also learned from experience that I could minimize the chances of being insulted if I didn’t stand out. So I would never wear any colors when I was young. I remember at one time I used to own 13 beige t-shirts and the rest were grey or white. I thought that I could never dress up. Dressing up = standing out and I could never take that risk. I remember wearing lip gloss just once and someone on the street said “nothing could save my face, so I shouldn’t try”.

So I never ever stood up for myself. I didn’t even know I had the right to do so, until one day a friend reprimanded a bunch of guys for insulting me and stood up for me. I’ll never forget that day, but I had lived for so long without having a spine that I never got around to being brave.

Then I moved out of India, and realized people didn’t hate on dark skin so much, and I started coming into my own. I could dress up! I could walk around without worrying about insults. I could smile at people on the streets! I think I probably abuse this freedom now and I over dress up and maybe I’m a tad over-friendly.

But what happened today brought it all back. I was dressed up and I was being called out for being dark skinned and so I just shut up and hung my head low. I said nothing…NOTHING to the Attacker. It was all sorts of messed up. He thought that I was black and I shouldn’t dress up because I was ugly. He thought I was with the guy next to me, and because I was black, I shouldn’t be with a white guy. He was provoked just by me being me to the point that he wanted to hit me.

I’m mad at what happened, but I’m mostly disturbed about me being such a coward. I’d like to believe I’m reasonably brave when it comes to other things but I just become a coward when verbal insults are involved. I have no idea how I can build the skill of being brave but I need to this. Also need to buy some pepper spray and learn some krav maga.

Post Script:

Firstly if my life has taught me anything it is to screw beauty standards and be the best “you” that you can be everyday. Comments about my skin color or beauty have stopped affecting me a long time ago, because after a while you get used to everything. I wasn’t affected by what he said about me AT ALL, I was disturbed by my reaction because I didn’t feel brave or resilient. Maybe I didn’t convey this too well in my post, but the reason I brought up being ridiculed about my skin color in the past was not because I was hurt by his comments about me, but to rationalize why I remained silent. I felt stuck in this moving train, feeling extremely weak and scared, and at that time (not now upon reflection) I felt even more weak because I didn’t say anything. I realize now after all your comments that it is natural to be scared and I probably did the best thing by being silent. But next time this happens, I want to feel strong and resilient and not threatened. My instincts will probably help me now, since I’ve gone through this incident, and learning self defense will also help in developing a sense of confidence. That is all that I need, some self confidence when I’m threatened, so I can think with a clear mind and not with a mind full of fear. I’ll probably do the same thing i.e. make myself safe and exit and report it to the police, but I want to feel less shaky and scared.

Writing about this helped me. It made me relive it one more time but I could end the story. It was like closure. Some people asked me my why I posted this. This post is public. A lot of people deny colorism and sexism and I hope this incident helps them see the reality through a story that makes the victim VISIBLE. It’s no longer, “some people face sexism” “some people get hated on because of their skin color” it is someone they know. I do agree that this guy was probably on drugs or was mentally unstable, but the biases that provoked him were not created by him. We created them as a society and are equally responsible for them.

‘LIFE IS AMAZING AND I HAVE SO MUCH LOVE TO GIVE, I won’t let these things bring me down’

This anecdote is inspired by an actual incident.It happened to an Indian based in the US. She faced colorism in India and the USA but decided to overcome it by surrounding herself with friends, educating herself well which in turn boosted her self esteem. She now works for a Silicon Valley giant and is no doubt, a much happier person.

Edit: You can read Seema’s original Facebook post here .

If you want to celebrate and enhance your unique beauty, check out our tips on beauty specifically for Indian women!

Places have been deliberately changed to protect the identity of the writer. Picture Reference: Sujai Blog, Pinterest and Dark Is Beautiful Campaign

#celebratediversity,#equalityofallskinshades,#bethevoice

Now for your viewing pleasure: A Charming Tale about A Dark-Skinned Indian Girl and Her Prince Charming

Please Share this with your friends and let the world know that dark is beautiful!

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