I woke covered in sweat and tears. Moonlight filtered in through my window bright enough for me to see. Another nightmare. One of flames and screams and fear. I shuddered and wiped my cheeks dry, getting out of the bed. I didn’t want to be alone tonight.

Today had been my 18th birthday but I hadn’t told anyone. It was nothing to celebrate, the anniversary of my dad’s death. I walked quietly out of my room and down the hall towards Ezra’s. The house was silent; I could hear the creaks of the old wood. Outside a wolf howled and I shivered, thinking of the Weres. I opened the door and peered in through the darkness.

“Ezra?” I called softly. I heard him mutter something and move. The fabric of the bed rustled.

“Logan?” He asked with a voice heavy with sleep.

“Can I…can I sleep with you tonight?” I asked, suddenly shy. Ezra pushed himself up in the bed and looked at me. I saw his mouth open for a moment but he quickly closed it.

“Uhm,” He paused, staring at me, “Y-yea, that’s fine. Is everything okay?” He asked.

I walked quietly towards him, the question catching me off guard. No one had asked me that before. Suddenly the tears welled to my eyes again. I opened my mouth to reply but nothing came out so I just shook my head. I don’t know why, but I wasn’t ashamed to cry in front of him. I think he heard my breath falter because he moved over, making room for me on the bed.

“Come here.” He whispered, holding his arms out. I climbed on the bed and pressed myself into him. He smelled of cinnamon – brown and dry and sweet and warm. I wrapped his arms tight around me and leaned back, letting me rest on his chest. I closed my eyes and felt the rise and fall as he breathed. I could faintly hear his heartbeat, fast and strong. Why was his heart beating so fast?

“Do you want to talk about it?” He asked quietly. I shook my head and shortly after I felt his head nod against mine. I closed my eyes as he began to run his fingers through my hair. “Go to sleep Logan, I won’t let you go.” He whispered against the top of my head and I did.

*******

I woke in the morning better rested than I had been in a long time. Ezra lay asleep beside me, his arms still wrapped around my body. I smiled softly and began to move carefully out of his grasp, not wanting to wake him. As soon as I thought I got out without him waking he opened his eyes and smiled at me.

“Good morning Lo. I like your hair.” He yawned, stretching. I smiled, suddenly nervous. He had let me fall asleep last night, so would he ask for his repayment now? Would he get angry that I didn’t give him something last night?

“Hey, what’s wrong?” He asked, sitting up and pulling me to him. I didn’t resist his touch and closed my eyes as his hand fell softly against my cheek.

“Nothing.” I said, not meeting his eyes. “When uhm, when do you want me to repay you for last night?”

When he didn’t reply after a moment I looked up to be met by eyes full of confusion. “Repay? What do you mea-“ He asked, then paused, understanding. Suddenly he let me go and sat back a bit. “Oh, no Logan. You don’t have to repay anything. Don’t ever think you need to do that. I’m not Alex or any of the other guys you’ve…been with.” He faltered for a moment, watching me.

“Logan, I care about you. You can come to me anytime for any reason and I’ll be there for you, no matter what and with no repayment expected.” He stood up and cupped my hands in his hands. “I’m not some beast you have to please to get something. Not all men are animals Logan. Please, don’t think of me as such.” I nodded and looked away, wrapping my arms around myself, not sure of what to say. I had never been in a situation such as this.

“Listen, let’s go out today okay? How about I take you out on the town and we explore a little? I’ll show you some of the best places in this village. We can eat something other than my horrible food. It’ll do you good to get out of this place, get your mind off the thoughts that consumed you last night.”

I nodded and began to walk out. I opened the door and began to walk down the hall to my room when Rowan passed me. He said nothing, but his eyes bore into me. I looked away, too confused to deal with him now. I had never had a man be nice to me like this and not expect anything in return. Was there some ulterior motive? Was he really wanting something and just not telling me? I dropped my clothes and turned on the shower.

More confusing was this feeling in my chest. Never in my life had I felt this…this ache. It was warm, yet shocking like jumping into freezing water after sitting in the hot tub. It was terrifying yet safe as a mother’s arms. It scared me down to my core yet thrilled me beyond belief. I wanted to know this, to understand it and yet I wanted to throw up my walls and run from it without looking back. I shook my head and turned off the water. I would push it to the back of my mind for now and think of it later. For now, I had to get ready to see the town.