My statement

With what all the brave women are sharing, I never thought I'd be re-sharing my issues with a FGC member called Kuzma, I felt like in comparison to what women have been sharing that has ensued since Evo's Afterparty that what I shut up and put up with was minor in comparison - but it still isn't okay.



Back at the beginning of April I was in London for an event called EGX Rezzed, I was supposed to go with my girl, but unfortunately her plans changed last minute.



Days prior to heading to London I developed a cold that turned into sinusitis, so I was pretty ill during this whole period.



The day I touched down in London I streamed with a good friend.



The next day was the first day of EGX Rezzed, so I spent the day there before heading off to Kuzma’s. My intentions was to meet some of my new teammates that Kuzma told me were going to be there, so from the four people that he mentioned were going to be there, only one of them turned up and the rest couldn't make it. A couple of friends of mine were also there.



While in Kuzma’s statement he states that I flirted with him; there are witnesses who can confirm that this is a lie, what they will also confirm is that Kuzma was the one hitting on me while I was socializing with everyone. I am unsure whether Kuzma had stated this because he was trying to gaslight me or because he has an inability to read social situations and cues, and regularly misinterprets them. Regardless of being sick and making it known to everyone, I was cracking jokes and chatting to everyone.



Before my friend left, I spoke to him about my stream the night before where I mentioned how boundaries were put in place and respected; Kuzma, who had been playing some matches, overhead and then started implying that the friend I had streamed with comfortably was some sort of sexual predator, even though I corrected him he kept trying to run with that and went on to spread that to a few people after the house session.



My friend left at 10pm and the rest of the people soon followed after that.



It ended up just being Kuzma and I chilling and talking; in the midst of conversation Kuzma decided to kiss me and to be honest that was vile; I only ever saw him as a friend and with how often I told him that, it irritated me that he thought there were any signs that would make this acceptable. The kiss was just unwarranted; there was no attraction, no signs and I was disgustingly ill with this cold.



While I can make excuses that he misinterpreted the situation; a part of me knows that he only acknowledges his own feelings and yet I still chalked it up to him not being able to read situations.



We went back to talking and some topics are definitely unsavoury, most of it always has to do with how he is unfairly picked on the FGC and I believed that was the truth naively. He droned it into my head enough that I took on some of his views and have said some pretty nasty things, I know I am responsible for my words and with that I made amends as best as I could with those I spoke poorly about.



During our convo he started to become overbearing with his feelings, he spoke how he ‘could really like me’ and just trying to pry out something mutual, but I just told him I am dead inside romantically and he just brushed it off.



At some point he did get changed into shorts and I took my wig off due to the headache it was giving me.



For the remainder we played some games and continued talking, after that I went back to my hotel to get some sleep for the 2nd Day Of EGX



Day 2 at EGX, I complained to one of my friends from another community about Kuzma briefly and what had transpired.



Later that day Kuzma was still pressing for us to meetup on Saturday





We didn’t meet up on Saturday, but in the evening Kuzma messaged me passive-aggressively because I didn’t get back to him; I called him to express my annoyance over the fact that he thought he could kiss me and dump his feelings on me, even when I had repeatedly told him that I don’t have an interest in dating anyone.



Alongside an overdramatic text from him the next day, he told me to give him a few days and he’ll be over his infatuation.



I don’t know when he started spreading his fantasy-story to his ‘boys’ about his power-trip fetish involving me, but I will talk about this from the point of when I heard it.



Rather than getting over his infatuation, on the 9th April, Kuzma wanted to talk to me about his feelings and how he wanted to be with me and fix me, because it’s not normal being ‘dead inside’. Due to past trauma, fix and repair are not words I take very well, so I tore into him, being treated or portrayed as broken because I don’t reciprocate someone’s feelings is complete bull.



As someone who on/off deals with situational depression and has been diagnosed more than once with it, I was happy to be at a point where I was comfortable in my own skin and I don’t feel like I am missing something. Due to a past relationship with a gaslighter, I have never reacted well to words like broken and damaged and Kuzma knew that.



I had made it clear to Kuzma that he doesn’t know me, but only knows my history and trauma because that’s what I shared with wisdom from experience dealing with it; also stated that he only liked me because I was kind to him and that was not a good enough reason because he didn’t know anything about me



Kuzma was stumped after that, I didn’t have much else to say about that topic but we continued talking, but it really bothered me that someone would view me as broken.



Shortly after our call he messaged me trying to arrange for us to meetup



Some time later he asked to talk, so I called as he wanted and in response to me rejecting him, he tried to prove that he did know me and what he liked which was all very superficial. With that, I dished out another rejection and I told him that he wasn’t my type, which he tried to argue that can change to be more suited, but he just prefers to be a certain way.



We spoke again on the phone and he was still pushing the topic of us dating, where I had to reject him again, I flat out told him that it was never going to happen, I am a Pakistani-Emirati Muslim and no matter what, faith is a huge part of my identity, so is family. After telling him a story or trial and error with my exes, I said it was never going to work or happen due to numerous factors -- that seemed to click in his head.



The last thing he said to me rejecting him for the 3rd time was this, he said, “well my only regret it that I didn’t get to fuck you that day and I have many opportunities to rectify that, including at VS Fighting”.



That disturbed me; it was like no matter what the situation was, I would be pressured into something, if it wasn’t a freaking relationship, it was going to be sex. That was the line that made me realize that I needed to reach out to people that I could be around for VS Fighting to just feel safe, the complete disregard he had disturbed me and for someone like him to preach it on the internet and then feel like it was alright to say that shit, it unnerved me.



We did speak again after that and he apologized for what he said, but with how overbearing he had been over multiple conversations, I just wasn’t okay with any of it. He did place the blame of it on his autism, that he said what he said with complete disregard to how it made me feel because of that.



***



Kuzma went to Combo Breaker and ended up befriending some of the ladies from the team I am in.



An event called WSO came about shortly after.



WSO was great because of the rest of the community, I focused on taking photos for the most part.



But throughout the day I saw him harassing people who were playing their matches and bragging about how he kicked a player out of a discord group to the guy’s face; it was vile how much time he spent mocking others, the worst part is that I just couldn’t believe how dumb I was not to see how toxic Kuzma truly was. It dawned on me that Kuzma really wasn’t the victim that he went on and on about being, he’s the cause of so much drama.





During the WSO, Kuzma was talking shit to a TO about the seeding and wouldn’t drop it, even saying shit like, “you best remember this…”, the TO squared up to him but no violence or anything ensued thankfully.



Shortly after WSO, I vented to my team about the entire thing in which one of the people informed me that Kuzma had told them that a TO tried to fight Kuzma and about how Kuzma was the victim because he asked questions about seeding



The person and I had a discord call and they told me what he had told them, alongside providing me with screenshots of their conversation about Kuzma detailing how the TO was just being aggressive, Kuzma stating that he wanted to get the CCTV for what happened because he was ‘innocent’.



I cleared up the situation and Kuzma’s false allegations with them and the rest of my team, but person was pissed off with the fact that Kuzma was trying to ruin someone’s job as a TO by gaslighting.



I unfollowed Kuzma on twitter and he messaged back on whatsapp all concerned about his numbers dropping and telling me to stop doing that. I blocked him on whatsapp after a few more messages back and forth.







Fighting Games Challenge happened shortly after (15th - 16th June) and the majority of my friends were in Poland for that; I had been playing video games with two of my friends, who also happened to be at Kuzma’s house session back in April.





And one of the guys casually drops in convo, “so Rose, I heard that you gave Kuzma a handjob”.





Again, I don't know when Kuzma had started spreading this power-trip fantasy of his that ‘I had come onto him, given him a handjob and got rejected by him’, but when my friend told me it hit me pretty hard.



Months prior to all this bs, I had a long conversation with Kuzma months prior to all this bs, talking about how women already have it harder due to the assumption that we sleep our way to the top. It was the exact reason why I had chosen not to date anyone because I wanted to build something positive that was all me and Kuzma intentionally created a narrative where instead of the positivity I added to the scene, they were just going to look at me as that girl in Kuzma’s twisted fantasy and that’s what was going to be attached to my name. Kuzma spreading this like a school boy bragging about his non-existent sexual escapades, it really upset me.



After being told that, that was the day I decided to go public and I admit back then it wasn’t clear at all with how I worded it as it was mostly about my feelings.



I had spent a lot of time talking to TOs after that point and the most they could do for me was to tell Kuzma to keep his distance from me, but even then he did not adhere to that.



Even Day 2 of VS Fighting was definitely an indicator of where I had people come up to me and tell me, ‘he’s behind you’ and just checking in on me and the same thing occurred at WSO (August 10th), majorly grateful for the people who kept checking on me and warning me that he’s behind me. With how distinctive I look there is no way he didn’t see me, he just chose to be close as if this was all some sick twisted game to make me feel uncomfortable and unsafe.



After hearing about what happened to Bianca Devins, I just don’t trust people like him and this mind games he was playing shows exactly why I said he isn’t truly about empowering women like he preaches on social media, but rather making us fearful and reliant on scum like him who will take advantage of the vulnerable and it’s disgusting. People are capable of fucked up shit and this guy already likes going around trying to destroy people in the FGC, which now has me on his list.



I have witnesses who can verify he was not keeping his distance, there is enough space in these venues that he didn’t have to be right behind me. I also have witnesses who can dismantle his statement he posted in June in regards to the lies he put up while people were there.



The fact that different people in the FGC can vouch for me when I had to take a breather outside because of him, I am doing my best and trying to not let a vindictive man push me out of the FGC, he is the most toxic person in this scene.



I stopped talking about my issue publicly in June after being horrified by Kuzma’s fantasy-fiction; a friend told me, “Rose it doesn’t matter what you say or do, people are going to look at you as the girl who gave Kuzma a handjob - whether that’s true or not, they don’t care, you got to deal with it”



That was also something that hit me hard.



Getting gaslighted and being sexually harassed from a guy who really refused to take no for an answer and when it finally dawned on him that nothing would happen between us, he decided to try to blow up my friendships with screenshots and rumours. He’s approached teams and players at Red Bull sessions telling his warped tales and has continued to try to isolate me.



What people don’t realize is how much energy I have to muster up because he made me reach a point where I wanted to die when he had posted his lies, that is the same energy I have to muster up when I go to these events because I am there to support my mates, take photos, capture memories and enjoy the experience, if I don’t muster up that energy to fight his lies, then it means he has won and has gotten rid of a woman from the FGC, the exact cause I am fighting for is getting more women into the FGC and ensuring we have safe spaces. This is far from okay. While he makes me feel sick and nauseous and I am toughing it out for a cause I feel strongly about.







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