The Funny 115 - version 2.0



#25. Tyson Apostol - A good guy to have around

Tocantins - all season long









"Tall, spiky hair blond boy. Love him."

"Tall, spiky hair blond boy.him."



"He just seems like a good guy to have around."

"He just seems like a good guy to have around."

wouldn't

ever



It's three seconds after Erinn just called him "a good guy to have around". Tyson's rebuttal?

It's three seconds after Erinn just called him "a good guy to have around". Tyson's rebuttal?



"The younger brunette? She comes off to me as kind of being... the bitch."

"The younger brunette? She comes off to me as kind of being... the bitch."



The bitch

The bitch



And there's dancing too

And there's dancing too



Tyson

Tyson

TWELVE RANDOMLY MEAN/FUNNY TYSON MOMENTS



12. Tyson hates Sierra



It's episode ten, and Tyson is bagging on Sierra

It's episode ten, and Tyson is bagging on Sierra



"I like to see Sierra scramble and mope, uh, I think it's funny."

"I like to see Sierra scramble and mope, uh, I think it's funny."



"Because I've never liked Sierra. To me, she's of no worth."

"Because I've never liked Sierra. To me, she's of no worth."



"I mean... her parents probably love her."

"I mean... her parents probably love her."







"I can't imagine her boyfriend's that cool."

"I can't imagine her boyfriend's that cool."

11. Tyson and the Ceramic Pigs



It's episode seven of Tocantins, and the tribes are competing in a challenge where they try to catch cute little ceramic pigs

It's episode seven of Tocantins, and the tribes are competing in a challenge where they try to catch cute little ceramic pigs



Tyson and the Timbiras dominate the challenge

Tyson and the Timbiras dominate the challenge



"Timbira! Wins reward!"

"Timbira! Wins reward!"



After the Timbiras win, what is Tyson's first reaction? Is he overjoyed? Is he excited? Is he basking now in the musky afterglow of challenge dominance?

After the Timbiras win, what is Tyson's first reaction? Is he overjoyed? Is he excited? Is he basking now in the musky afterglow of challenge dominance?



No, Tyson's first instinct is pure childlike bloodlust.

No, Tyson's first instinct is pure childlike bloodlust.



"Gimme a pig! Lemme smash it!"

"Gimme a pig! Lemme smash it!"



He runs off to go smash a pig

He runs off to go smash a pig



The Timbiras celebrate in the foreground, and there's Tyson in the background, destroying a pig.

The Timbiras celebrate in the foreground, and there's Tyson in the background, destroying a pig.



Ka---

Ka---



--- BOOM!

--- BOOM!



The Bacon Slayer

The Bacon Slayer

10. Tyson's Naked Water Run



It's episode one, and Tyson decides he is going to do a naked water run. Why? No reason.

It's episode one, and Tyson decides he is going to do a naked water run. Why? No reason.



It's just more fun when you are the guy walking around with the blur

It's just more fun when you are the guy walking around with the blur







Especially when it makes people uncomfortable

Especially when it makes people uncomfortable











I love this shot

I love this shot

9. Tyson trolls for phone numbers



It's episode eight, and Tyson has just won individual immunity

It's episode eight, and Tyson has just won individual immunity







Back at camp, he does an interview where he takes a moment to subtly brag about himself

Back at camp, he does an interview where he takes a moment to subtly brag about himself



"So, I kicked ass, like I always do."

"So, I kicked ass, like I always do."



"And...uh... if any ladies want my phone number..."

"And...uh... if any ladies want my phone number..."



"I guess... uh..."

"I guess... uh..."







"Ask."

"Ask."





8. Tyson lies to your face and you eat it up



There really could not be a more "Tyson" type scene than this one. Enjoy. This is in episode two when he is randomly talking around camp with Candace.

There really could not be a more "Tyson" type scene than this one. Enjoy. This is in episode two when he is randomly talking around camp with Candace.



"I was thinking I really wanna steam, like, a big, like, sea bass."

"I was thinking I really wanna steam, like, a big, like, sea bass."



Two seconds in, and Tyson is already bored by this conversation

Two seconds in, and Tyson is already bored by this conversation



"We could steam it with like, some olive oil, and fresh lime juice."

"We could steam it with like, some olive oil, and fresh lime juice."







"And wrap it up in aluminum foil and just let it steam."

"And wrap it up in aluminum foil and just let it steam."



"We could find most of that stuff," replies Tyson.

"We could find most of that stuff," replies Tyson.



"Are you serious?"

"Are you serious?"







"I lied straight to your face, and you ate it up."

"I lied straight to your face, and you ate it up."





7. Tyson fantasizes about an Erinn blindside



It's episode three, and Tyson is fantasizing about what he would like to happen to Erinn tonight

It's episode three, and Tyson is fantasizing about what he would like to happen to Erinn tonight



"Anytime there's a blindside, it's pretty awesome. Just the look on somebody's face."

"Anytime there's a blindside, it's pretty awesome. Just the look on somebody's face."



"I think Erinn wants to be here so so bad, that her getting blindsided would look really cool."

"I think Erinn wants to be here so so bad, that her getting blindsided would look really cool."



"I love seeing people cry. When you crush their dreams."

"I love seeing people cry. When you crush their dreams."







"For the most part I've written Erinn off. I mean, I haven't really talked to her one on one, about anything. And she doesn't hang out with the tribe a lot."

"For the most part I've written Erinn off. I mean, I haven't really talked to her one on one, about anything. And she doesn't hang out with the tribe a lot."



"Plus I think she'll be really really upset when she gets voted off, and I'd like to see, uh, a freak out at Tribal."

"Plus I think she'll be really really upset when she gets voted off, and I'd like to see, uh, a freak out at Tribal."



"I think that would be fun."

"I think that would be fun."

6. Tyson doesn't pay attention when people talk



It's episode four, and Tyson is recapping all the important things that went down at Tribal Council last night

It's episode four, and Tyson is recapping all the important things that went down at Tribal Council last night



"Last night at Tribal we established a leader, kind of."

"Last night at Tribal we established a leader, kind of."







"So I guess... Brendan or Coach is the leader?"

"So I guess... Brendan or Coach is the leader?"







"I don't know. It's, uh... I wasn't paying attention. I don't really care."

"I don't know. It's, uh... I wasn't paying attention. I don't really care."

5. Tyson bags on both Brendan and Sierra



It's episode eight, and Tyson is doing what he does best. Talking shit about people.

It's episode eight, and Tyson is doing what he does best. Talking shit about people.



"Lying to everybody, especially Brendan and Sierra, actually brings me pleasure."

"Lying to everybody, especially Brendan and Sierra, actually brings me pleasure."



"I never liked Sierra, ever."

"I never liked Sierra, ever."



"I have no clue why she's out here, other than to just give hope to stupid people around the world."

"I have no clue why she's out here, other than to just give hope to stupid people around the world."



"And Brendan is really the sneakiest bastard I have to worry about."

"And Brendan is really the sneakiest bastard I have to worry about."



"We smile at each other. We hug. I've kissed him on the neck. Softly."

"We smile at each other. We hug. I've kissed him on the neck. Softly."



"He's felt my warm steamy breath on the nape of his neck."

"He's felt my warm steamy breath on the nape of his neck."



"Even on the small of his back."

"Even on the small of his back."



"But, you know, as the old adage goes, keep your friends close and your enemies closer."

"But, you know, as the old adage goes, keep your friends close and your enemies closer."



"That's right. Right?"

"That's right. Right?"

4. Tyson loves to bully Sierra



It's episode nine, and Tyson is talking about the blindside going down for Brendan tonight

It's episode nine, and Tyson is talking about the blindside going down for Brendan tonight



"If Brendan gets wind of it [the blindside] and uses his idol, Sierra's gone. Brendan's gone in three days from that."

"If Brendan gets wind of it [the blindside] and uses his idol, Sierra's gone. Brendan's gone in three days from that."



"I'd like to see him go first, cause I'd like three days of just bossin' her around, and tellin' her to shut up."

"I'd like to see him go first, cause I'd like three days of just bossin' her around, and tellin' her to shut up."







"It probably won't win me her vote from the jury."

"It probably won't win me her vote from the jury."



"But it would probably win me everybody else's vote."

"But it would probably win me everybody else's vote."



"So it'd be a win-win for me."

"So it'd be a win-win for me."





3. Tyson offers to help J.T.



It's the episode seven immunity challenge, and Tyson is squaring off against J.T.

It's the episode seven immunity challenge, and Tyson is squaring off against J.T.



Tyson lines up his slingshot

Tyson lines up his slingshot



One target down

One target down



Second target down

Second target down



J.T. nervously watches Tyson hit his targets

J.T. nervously watches Tyson hit his targets



Third target down. Well this is easy.

Third target down. Well this is easy.



Yeah I'm awesome.

Yeah I'm awesome.



Joe from the sidelines asks nervously, "'JT? You want me to take over for you?"

Joe from the sidelines asks nervously, "'JT? You want me to take over for you?"



"No, that's okay. I got it."

"No, that's okay. I got it."



Tyson hears this and helpfully pipes in

Tyson hears this and helpfully pipes in



"I'll come over and do it if you want."

"I'll come over and do it if you want."



Timbira laughter

Timbira laughter

2. Tyson is even more cold blooded than BobDawg



Remember the two other entries that I said were cold things you would say to a mf right before you popped a cap in their ass?

Remember the two other entries that I said were cold things you would say to a mf right before you popped a cap in their ass?



Well "Denise sucks at life" was harsh, but at least it wasn't to Denise's face. It was behind her back.

Well "Denise sucks at life" was harsh, but at least it wasn't to Denise's face. It was behind her back.



In my opinion, this one by Tyson is even more cold-blooded than Bobby's comment to Courtney about drinking her wine

In my opinion, this one by Tyson is even more cold-blooded than Bobby's comment to Courtney about drinking her wine



It's episode ten, and Tyson is laying down the law why they can't trust Sierra anymore

It's episode ten, and Tyson is laying down the law why they can't trust Sierra anymore



"You keep scrambling and you keep backpedalling."

"You keep scrambling and you keep backpedalling."







"And you keep making excuses about how you didn't know."

"And you keep making excuses about how you didn't know."



(near tears) "I'm not trying to scramble, Tyson, I'm trying to explain my side.

(near tears) "I'm not trying to scramble, Tyson, I'm trying to explain my side.



(in tears) "So it doesn't look like I was the mastermind behind it."

(in tears) "So it doesn't look like I was the mastermind behind it."



Tyson is unmoved

Tyson is unmoved



"I don't think you were the mastermind. I don't think you're smart enough for it."

"I don't think you were the mastermind. I don't think you're smart enough for it."



He fucking says this RIGHT TO HER FACE

He fucking says this RIGHT TO HER FACE



Sierra's reaction

Sierra's reaction



BobDawg would be proud

BobDawg would be proud

1. Tyson slams Sierra while simultaneously flirting with Brendan.



It's Tribal Council in episode ten, and Jeff Probst just asked Tyson if he feels vulnerable tonight without immunity

It's Tribal Council in episode ten, and Jeff Probst just asked Tyson if he feels vulnerable tonight without immunity



"I'm feeling pretty comfortable. People I've aligned myself with are the people I trust."

"I'm feeling pretty comfortable. People I've aligned myself with are the people I trust."



"I'm also pretty happy that Debbie won. When you can't win yourself, it's nice to see someone you love win."

"I'm also pretty happy that Debbie won. When you can't win yourself, it's nice to see someone you love win."



Awww. "Thank you Tyson."

Awww. "Thank you Tyson."



"JT, little hard to hear that? Tyson saying "Well if I can't win, I'm glad that Debbie won." He didn't say I'm glad..."

"JT, little hard to hear that? Tyson saying "Well if I can't win, I'm glad that Debbie won." He didn't say I'm glad..."



(interrupting) Well I said "Someone I love."

(interrupting) Well I said "Someone I love."



"It's not to say she's the only one I love here."

"It's not to say she's the only one I love here."



(taking the bait) "Who else do you love here?"

(taking the bait) "Who else do you love here?"



Tyson blatantly names off everyone but Sierra.

Tyson blatantly names off everyone but Sierra.



"Um, Debbie. Coach. Stephen...."

"Um, Debbie. Coach. Stephen...."



"Taj. Erinn. J.T. "

"Taj. Erinn. J.T. "



Sierra just sits there and rolls her eyes.

Sierra just sits there and rolls her eyes.



But Tyson's not done. Because he also loves the guy sitting over in the jury.

But Tyson's not done. Because he also loves the guy sitting over in the jury.



"Brendan." (wink)

"Brendan." (wink)







Shit eating grin

Shit eating grin



I love the whole "I love everyone but Sierra" scene. Here it is in gif form (including Coach's reaction to Sierra just getting a verbal knockout punch). This is one of Tyson's best Survivor moments.

I love the whole "I love everyone but Sierra" scene. Here it is in gif form (including Coach's reaction to Sierra just getting a verbal knockout punch). This is one of Tyson's best Survivor moments.



Tyson's final words: "It bothers me that Sierra will be here longer than me."

Tyson's final words: "It bothers me that Sierra will be here longer than me."



"Little weird being outfoxed by an idiot."

"Little weird being outfoxed by an idiot."



"When it comes down to it, I want that million dollars. Exotic, expensive furs on my shoulder. Jewels on these pretty fingers. We're talkin' big time."

"When it comes down to it, I want that million dollars. Exotic, expensive furs on my shoulder. Jewels on these pretty fingers. We're talkin' big time."



"I'll wear a tiara-- a man tiara. Do they make those?"

"I'll wear a tiara-- a man tiara. Do they make those?"



"Here's what I don't like about the Funny 115. You guys ready...?"

"Here's what I don't like about the Funny 115. You guys ready...?"



Tyson wearing the immunity necklace on his head on the way to Brendan's blindside

Tyson wearing the immunity necklace on his head on the way to Brendan's blindside

As a fellow Survivor and horror movie fan I feel obligated to share one of my favorite things about Tyson: His uncanny resemblance to Freddy Krueger.



Seriously, compare Tyson to vintage Robert Englund-- the gaunt face, the hooked nose, the near skeletal frame, the love for sadistic quips-- and you have a Survivor monster almost on par with Matthew von Ertfelda's Jason Voorhees. Of course, if he had Dave Ball's freakish armspan and could do that scraping two walls at once bit from the original Nightmare movie, then the comparison would be perfect.









One.. two... Assistant Coach is comin for you...

One.. two... Assistant Coach is comin for you...



Tyson bullying Sierra

Tyson bullying Sierra

Interviewer: Other than Russell, was there anyone else that you didn't recognize in the game, or did you pretty much know everybody and their gameplay?

Tyson: You know, I wasn't that familiar with Danielle, and I actually watched her season weeks before I left for Samoa. And I still didn't recognize her, or remember her.

Interviewer: Yeah, we've experienced that too.

Tyson: Yeah, it's like, who is that? Is she on the crew? What's her job here? So her. Candice I knew of, 'cause I thought it was hilarious that they kept sending her to Exile Island on her season...'cause she was breaking down. But I did not think that she would be out there [on Heroes vs Villains], you know?









