This week, the new startup Altwork dropped its first product, the Altwork Station, which will allow you to sit, stand, or lie down while you work. The Signature Station, as seen below, will cost early adopters $4,900 before the price goes up another G. There is also a Standard Station for $3,900, but you have to make so many sacrifices regarding upholstery choices that I won't even consider it a viable option.

As GQ's resident Standing Desk Guy, I am generally up for anything—no matter how "quirky"—that will improve my office life. Need a YouTube meditation break every hour or so? Me too. Wanna step out for nine coffees? You do you. Take a nap in one of those weird ostrich pillows? Go for it. I would join you, except I wake up from every nap four hours after I intended to.

However, lying on your back to work is where I draw the line. This degree of cozy is reserved for when you are tired. If you lie down at night, and you lie down at work, you are spending too much of your life on your back. I can imagine this desk being viable at about four offices, and all of them have someone employed with one of those stupid made-up titles like "Disruption Wizard."