Many years ago, the marriage of a friend of mine broke down. Relationships are complex, but the biggest issue was her complete disinterest in sex. Her husband complained about their lack of intimacy, pleaded for sex, and finally asked for counselling. But my friend just wasn’t interested and, eventually, her husband had an affair.

It’s a common story. Except I changed one major detail.

It was my friend’s husband who was no longer interested in sex, not my female friend. She confided in me that they had had sex only two or three times in the past decade. A few years after her affair, she found the courage to leave her marriage, and is now in a satisfying relationship.

Lack of interest in sex on the part of my friend's husband eventually led to the end of her marriage. Credit:Shutterstock

My friend isn’t alone or even unusual. I know several women who have had affairs or left marriages because their husbands had no interest in sex. Despite the old trope that it is women in long marriages who lose interest in sex, there are stats to prove this; including statistics from married dating site Ashley Madison, which found that a lack of marital sex is one of the primary reasons that women stray.