I am an idiot. Yes, I am.

Of course you know the answer. We all do.

Why is Bishop Franco Mulakkal still a free man? Stupid question.

Why isn’t the E. coli scare in Bengaluru’s Indira Canteens a big national headline? Another stupid question.

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In India, almost anything can be ‘secular’. Allegations of rape can be secular. Even disease causing dangerous microbes like E. coli can be secular. And how far is Indian secularism from being a disease causing agent anyway?

The finding seems very credible, backed up by lab reports from Ramaiah Hospital in Bengaluru.

As published by Deccan Herald, the Ramaiah Hospital report clearly states that the food sample is *not safe* for human consumption.

This is happening in one of India’s biggest, most important metropolitan cities. Thousands of people could be consuming tainted food on a massive scale.

Imagine if this was unfolding in a BJP ruled state, especially Uttar Pradesh. But it is not, so observe how cosily and comfortably the liberal mainstream media has buried the news.

Say, where are all those liberals who say the ‘national mainstream’ cares only about the Hindi speaking belt and ignores the South? Where are the ‘Dravidistan’ social media warriors?

Here is a perfect situation for you to come out of your holes and prove your worth. Here is a case where the ‘national’ media is ignoring a dangerous health emergency in a southern city. Here is your chance to demand that the nation sit up and pay attention to the fate of Bengaluru.

Except they won’t speak up now. Because they only speak on issues that benefit the ‘Break India’ forces. Their love for ‘Dravidistan’ is limited to trending #GoBackModi on Twitter for absurd reasons. Or manufacturing excuses and lies to cover up the failure of Kerala’s CPM government to provide flood relief.

Because they are partisan hacks and literally nothing more.

Incidentally, Rahul ji was in Bengaluru yesterday. Did he speak on what is happening at the Indira canteens? I don’t think so.

There have been serious scam allegations surrounding the Indira canteens before. Allegations that the government, which pays Rs 32 per plate to contractors, is getting billed for 400 plates per day at each spot, while tokens given out might not be more than 120-150. I don’t know. I would not be surprised if there is a scam. Anyway, the media let the matter drop (again for obvious reasons).

But the sspectre of tainted food, possibly with E. coli in it, is a whole different matter altogether. Why won’t the national media descend on Bengaluru, pressurizing the state government to get the facts sorted out immediately?

This is truly a metaphor for ‘Indian secularism’. Anything goes… people are even expected to eat E. coli and be happy about it as long as it serves the cause of ‘Indian secularism’.

It’s not like the media does not care about issues surrounding food in Karnataka. The Hindu is hot on the trail of a very significant food related matter:

Oh no! How will kids survive without onion and garlic?

The secular interest in this matter is very understandable. The contractor here is Akshaya Patra. Not surprisingly, this has attracted a horde of Hinduphobes who are determined to take this away from them.

Pray tell us who we should put in charge of feeding the kids instead? Please tell me it is not Bishop Franco Mulakkal that you have in mind.

No onion and garlic in school midday meals becomes an issue, but E. coli in Indira Canteen meals does not. The wonder that is Indian secularism.

For a while now, Hinduphobes have made a habit of referring to Hindus as “cow p*ss drinkers”. You’ve all seen the jokes on social media. Even after Pulwama, where the terrorist Adil Dar explicitly stated his motive of punishing the “cow p*ss drinkers”, the flood of Hinduphobic jokes did not stop. No liberal thought even for a moment that adopting the same xenophobic tropes as the terrorist was in poor taste.

In the wake of the mess at Indira Canteens, what if somebody started referring to Indian liberals as “E. coli eaters”?

Except, people should never do that. Because that wouldn’t be funny at all. And in very very poor taste. Not to mention ironic.

Because the liberals who deliberately look away from the E. coli scare at Indira canteens would never need to eat the cheap, subsidized food there. You know Lutyens has some sort of foreign food festival going on almost every week. That’s where they eat. They couldn’t care less about the quality of the food eaten by the urban poor in Bengaluru.