Illustration by Barry Falls

Here’s something you might already have guessed — as a parent you have very little influence over whether your child tries alcohol. That’s one finding from a survey of 5,000 children between the ages of 12 and 19, by researchers at Brigham Young University’s College of Family, Home and Social Sciences. Whatever the approach of the parent — strict versus laid back, warm versus distant — the kids who responded were equally likely to take a drink.

What parents do seem to affect, the study says, is whether that drinking becomes a problem. The researchers found a direct and intriguing relationship between parenting and the likelihood of “heavy drinking,” which they defined as having five or more drinks in a row.

Using measures of “accountability” (at the high end on the scale were parents who knew where their children were and who they were with) and “warmth,” the study found that children who scored their parents highest on both were the least likely to drink heavily and also least likely to have friends who drank. Those whose parents were highest on accountability but lowest on warmth (dubbed “strict parents”) had double the risk, and children of “indulgent” parents, (low on accountability and high on warmth) had triple the risk. (Teenagers who described themselves as most religious, by the way, were the least likely to drink at all. This was, after all, a study out of B.Y.U.)

So the message here seems to be “love and verify.” Which also isn’t surprising. But good to remember. And reassuring to have confirmed.