Don’t get the wrong idea: when I say “we” I certainly do not mean me, for whom Ukip is a totally bonkers option and not even faintly amusing. By “we” I mean five-eighths of the people in the Oak on any given night. They include the sort of people who never vote, the sort who vote but don’t talk about it and the sort who you know would or should be voting Tory because they always have. And not only voted but canvassed and baked cakes and sold raffle tickets and housed summer garden parties and put graven images of Sir George Young in their window with the slogan: We’re Keeping YOUNG. People who have Kept YOUNG for 30 years, and attended party conference in all the seaside destinations.