The death of gratitude:

The Roman philosopher and statesman Cicero insisted that gratitude was “the parent of all the other virtues.” Cicero did not define gratitude as Mafia-like loyalty or mutual back-scratching. He was not referring to a pop socialism where all supposedly owe their successes to the government. Instead, gratitude is proof of humility and offers perspective. It is an appreciation for others, often now dead, who have helped to make us what we are. Without it, we are narcissists and self-absorbed amnesiacs. Unfortunately, our modern “me” generation has forgotten gratitude and replaced it with the art of victimization. Contemporary Americans prefer blaming others — parents, ancestors, their country, the world in general — for their own unhappiness while patting themselves on the back for anything that goes well. Nowhere is the death of gratitude more acute than at our elite universities. Today’s students hunt for micro-aggressions, slights that register only on their hypersensitive Richter scales of victimization. They pout over mean Halloween costumes, inauthentic ethnic food or politically incorrect literature assignments. They are angry even at mute statues and century-old names chiseled on the arches of their ivy-covered halls.

The little signs of your society’s K-status are all around you. Being grateful means your amygdala was braced for the nasty alternative, and it was so pleasantly surprised by your good fortune it made you want to express appreciation to someone.

One of the hallmarks of a narcissist is an absence of true gratitude. They can fake it, if they think you are going to be useful, but by and large they expect everyone to make their lives as delightful as possible, so they may sulk in envy over little pleasures others may enjoy. Fail to provide them with that, and they will default to rage. Obviously it is the most extreme version of the r-strategists subtle expectation of free resources. It is literally programming designed for their specific environment.

This is one of the reasons I expect we will end up happier in Apocalypse. Our focus will shift from the little things we are denied to the big disasters we were able to avoid. Buy a car today, and then find out another model had some little triffle you really wanted, and you end up slightly bothered – while driving around in a new car. See the barbarians raid your neighborhood in a effort to raze all the buildings, but let them only level one, before your neighborhood watch manages to kill them all, and you are down one building – but boy that was lucky!

Jost’s mortal salience stimuli has the same effect. Show someone a coffin, or remind them that we are all only here for a brief time, and all that worry about material things and tragedies of the moment will fade away into gratefulness – you can hold your loved one’s close – even if it will be limited in time, at least in this plane.

All of life is yin and yang. Without being reminded of the bad, you don’t know how wonderful the good is.

Apocalypse antidepressant – life is short for everyone – take the time to enjoy what you’ve got.