We’ll never know for sure whether Alfred Shaw sledged Charles Bannerman with his first delivery at the MCG on March 15, 1877, to mark the beginning of Australia-England Test rivalry.

But it’s safe to say that, over the proceeding 336 Tests and 138 years, their successors have had their fill.

As we prepare for the first Test in Cardiff, we look back at the 31 best/worst sledges - some verified, some apocryphal, all gems - in Ashes history.

Glenn McGrath v Michael Atherton

McGrath: “Athers, it would help if you got rid of the s**t at the end of your bat.”

(Atherton looks at the bottom of his bat).

McGrath: “No, mate, at the other end.”

Bill Woodfull v Douglas Jardine

England captain Douglas Jardine complained to counterpart Bill Woodfull about Australian players swearing at him, to which Woodfull replied:

“Now which of you bastards called this bastard a bastard?”

This quote was later immortalised in the Bodyline television mini-series.

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Shane Warne v Paul Collingwood

Every member of England’s 2005 Ashes winning team were awarded MBEs. This included Paul Collingwood whose sole contribution was scoring 17 at the Oval.

Warne: “You’ve got an MBE, right? For scoring 17 at the Oval? That’s embarrassing.”

Jimmy Ormond v Mark Waugh

Waugh: “There’s no way you’re good enough to play for England.”

Ormond: “Maybe not, but at least I’m the best player in my own family.”

Fred Trueman v Australian batsman

Trueman: “Don’t bother shutting the gate, son, you’ll be back soon.”

Ian Botham v Rodney Hogg

After Hogg lost his balance while bowling and fell at Botham’s feet:

Botham: “I know you think I’m great Hoggy, but no need to get down on your knees.”

Craig McDermott v Phil Tufnell

After getting bowled by Phil Tufnell:

McDermott: “You’ve got to bat on this in a minute, Tuffers. Hospital food suit you?”

Dennis Lillee on Geoff Boycott

Lillee: “Geoffrey Boycott is the only fellow I’ve met who fell in love with himself at a young age and has remained faithful ever since.”

Ian Botham v Rod Marsh

Marsh: “How’s your wife and my kids?”

Botham: “The wife’s fine, but the kids are retarded.”

Michael Atherton v Ian Healy

Healy: “You’re a f***ing cheat.”

Atherton: “When in Rome, dear boy.”

Steve Waugh v himself

After realising Atherton’s men wouldn’t sledge him:

Waugh: “Oh, I get it. Nobody’s talking to Steve. Okay! I’ll talk to my f***ing self!”

Merv Hughes v Graeme Hick

Hughes: “If you turn the bat over there’s instructions on the back.”

Ian Healy v Nasser Hussain

After Steve Waugh instructed Ricky Ponting to field under Nasser Hussain’s nose:

Healy: “That could be anywhere inside a three-mile radius.”

Allan Border v Robin Smith

After Smith asked for a drink during the 1989 Trent Bridge Test:

Border: “What do you think this is, a f***ing tea party? No, you can’t have a f***ing glass of water, you can f***ing wait like the rest of us.”

Ernie Jones v WG Grace

After clipping Grace’s beard with a nasty bouncer:

Jones: “Sorry, Doctor, she slipped.”

Michael Vaughan v Ricky Ponting

Welcomed to the crease with a gobful from Ponting, England captain Michael Vaughan pulled no punches:

Vaughan: “Get back to the slips, Ponting. Who do you think you are, Steve Waugh?”

Dennis Lillee v Mike Gatting

Lillee: “Hell, Gatt, move out of the way, I can’t see the stumps.”

Australian fan v Phil Tufnell

Fan: “Oi, Tufnell! Can I borrow your brain? I’m building an idiot.”

English fan v Aussie opener and cook book author Matthew Hayden

Fan: “You’re s**t Hayden, and so is your chicken casserole.”

Robin Smith v Merv Hughes I

Hughes: “You can’t f***ing bat.”

Smith hits Hughes for four.

Smith: “Hey Merv, we make a fine pair. I can’t f***ing bat and you can’t f***ing bowl.”

Robin Smith v Merv Hughes II:

Four years later Robin Smith got the better of Hughes again:

Hughes: “It’s four years since I bowled to you and you haven’t improved.”

Smith hits Hughes for four.

Smith: “Neither have you.”

Michael Clarke to James Anderson

Clarke: “Get ready for a broken f***ing arm.”

David Steele v Rodney Marsh

David Steele’s successful prediction to Rodney Marsh —

Steele: Take a good look at this a*** of mine, you’ll see plenty of it this summer

Phil Tufnell v the umpire

Tufnell: Are you blind

Umpire: I beg your pardon

Tufnell: Are you f***ing deaf as well?

Nasser Hussain v Justin Langer

Hussain: “I don’t mind this lot (the Australian slips cordon) chirping at me but you’re just the bus driver.”

Fred Trueman v batsman

Batsman: “That was a very good ball, Fred.”

Trueman: “Aye, and it was wasted on you.”

Graham Gooch v Mike Gatting

Gatting was the victim of some friendly fire after being bowled by Warne’s “ball of the century”.

Gooch: “If it had been a cheese roll, it wouldn’t have got past him.”

Ian Chappell v Phil Tufnell

Chappelli proved as adept sledging from the commentary box as he did the field.

Chappell: “The other advantage England have when Tufnell is bowling is that he isn’t fielding.”

David Hookes v Tony Greig

Greig: “When are your balls going to drop, sonny?”

Hookes: “I don’t know, but at least I’m playing cricket for my own country.”

Hookes would later hit Greig for five consecutive boundaries.

Merv Hughes v Graham Gooch

Hughes: “Would you like me to bowl a piano and see if you can play that?”

Shane Warne v Ian Bell

Warne and Clarke watched “American Pie” and decided to sledge Bell with “Sherminator” references throughout the series. It seemed to get under the Englishman’s skin.

Warne: You don’t like being called the Sherminator do you?

Bell (tersely): I’ve been called worse.

ASHES PODCAST: Listen to Stuart MacGill and Max Abbott talk all things Ashes in the very first edition of the Fox Cricket Podcast. The boys will be joined by former Test bowler and veteran English journalist Derek Pringle every day of the Ashes to bring some cricket and colour to your morning commute. Click here to check it out on iTunes.