I was SO excited when I got an 'orangered in email!" that included a survey of questions from my Trick or Treat Santa. I'd seen them in others' posts, but never gotten one before. I knew that they usually came from Santas who go above and beyond. Just filling the thing out gave me a jolt of excitement that carried through the day. My Santa asked about many things, including whether I had any pets. This is what I replied:

"I have a white cat with a grey tail and ears named Chiyo... She's almost 17 years old, and I've had her most of my adult life. She used to be really gloriously fat, but she's grown frail with age. I just bought stairs so that she can more easily climb up onto all of the furniture I've been kicking her off of her whole life."

What neither I nor my Santa could have known was that between the time that I wrote that, and the time that I received my gift, my beloved Chiyo would begin having trouble breathing. I would take her to the vet. The vet would tell me, "It is time to think about saying goodbye." I got that news on a Thursday. My Santa's package -- just as exciting and treat-filled as I could have dreamed -- arrived on Friday.

My Santa included gifts for Chiyo -- a bag of treats and one of those cool wall mounted catnip scratchers. These were things I would have never thought to go out and buy in my cat's last weekend with me, but as we counted down the hours until her final appointment with the vet, I grew so grateful for them. All I wanted to do was play with and love on my kitty, and these gave me extra ways to do so. She LOVES catnip, and we were all out. I didn't bother wall mounting the scratcher, but she loved rubbing her face on it, and I used it to brush her. She rolled around in the nip just like in the good old days.

By the end of the weekend, the treats were all she would eat.

Yesterday, at 5:00, we took Chiyo to the vet, and ... the whole thing was very peaceful. And sad. So, so sad.

So, of course I am crying now. And I know this is not what my Santa intended, and she sent SO many wonderful things (I love glitter nail polish! I wear it every day and can't wait to bust out the black. And Maleficent was one of my favorite movies this year. I saw it twice in the theater. And I've been using my new pens to grade all 43 of the personal narratives I've got to get through before Friday...), and I will try to photograph them and add them to this page when I am feeling more celebratory, but right now I just want to think about my sweet old lady cat, and thank my Santa for giving me more ways to take care of her in her last days.

Goodbye, Chiyo. You were the best cat ever. I love you so much.