LAS CRUCES, NM—Snarling as she charged forward, crazed, froth-mouthed local mother Donna Gibson demanded grandchildren right now, sources reported Thursday. “I want precious grandbabies now! Now! Now! Now!” shrieked a wild-eyed Gibson into the face of her son and daughter-in-law as she lifted them up by their collars above broken glass and an overturned kitchen table. “You’re going to give them to me! No more waiting! Do it now!” At press time, Gibson was nuzzling her newborn granddaughter as the baby’s parents watched from a safe distance.

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