A relationship expert who describes herself as the 'Get the Ring Coach' has revealed why women looking for marriage should refuse to date men on an exclusive basis - until they propose.

Love and Relationship Coach Sami Wunder, who is based between the UK and Germany, used the same trick herself when she first met Chris, now her husband, by refusing to stop dating other people until he popped the question.

Nine months later he did and now they have been happily married for five years and have a son, while Sami has been responsible for 95 proposals in two years of business - with one taking just three months.

'This approach works wonderfully well for that smart, successful, amazing woman who has aced all aspects of her life and career and love is the only thing that hasn't worked out for her,' she told Femail.

She is so ready to settle down and have a family right now, and doesn't want to waste time being someone's girlfriend for years, especially when he has no clear intention of offering her marriage or the commitment she wants.

'The way the system is built, masculine men who aim to settle down themselves and want to commit and have a family, will love a decisive woman who knows what she wants and will give her the commitment she deserves, if they are serious about her and in love.

Love and Relationship Coach Sami Wunder who is based between the UK and Germany insists that women shouldn't be exclusive until they have a ring on their finger

Sami refused to stop dating other men while seeing Chris, who is now her husband, and he proposed within nine months

'If not, they will say no and that helps both parties to move on quickly, without giving false hopes or promises.

'The thing to understand about this system is that it isn't a pressure based manipulation tactic or an ultimatum you're giving to a man.

'He still has the choice to not commit to you, to say no, to go see others himself or simply stop seeing you.

'That is his right. The system only ensures that you don't offer full husband benefits to such a man, that only wants to offer you girlfriend status.

How do you get a proposal? DO Understand this isn't a strategy to manipulate men but rather to stand in your power and not settle for anything less than a full commitment - the ring, the proposal. If a man does ask you if you're seeing others, be honest and share openly. If he doesn't want you to see others, refuse politely. He is just seeing you and shouldn't be telling you what you should do or not do unless he has a solid offer for you on the table. Treat all men equally, even those you like a lot, because if they're serious about you, they will just step up and block more and more of your time. Hold your nerve. I am confident that if Chris hadn't stepped up to claim me, someone else would have started to show up in my life more consistently. Basically, if you're not serious, you will just fizzle out or be over-taken by a man who is darn serious about the woman in front of him. DON'T Don't get sexually involved too quickly. Remember, you're going on 'connection dates' Use this as a strategy to pressure the man into marrying you. If he doesn't want to, rotational date till you have attracted that man who does want to give you the world. Feel guilty or like you're cheating him, just because you're seeing him on dates. Dating just means "girl for now" and you want to be a man's forever girl and for that, you must stand up for yourself and know what you deserve. Wait for a proposal. Your motto is, "May the best man win" and the men you're dating know this and feel this. In the Wunder Soulmate attraction method, you're the prize in love, just because you're a woman. Advertisement

'Hence, for self aware, healthy men and woman, who know they are looking for a life time commitment, the system works beautifully well.'

Before Sami met Chris her love life, she admits, was a 'disaster'.

If she did get past the first date, the burgeoning relationship usually fizzled out after two or three months.

'My point of transformation came when a New York based attorney, broke my heart and told me he "wasn't feeling it for me" after two months of electric, intense dating. I truly thought he was the one,' Sami recalled.

Mother-of-one Sami said that she was confident Chris would recognise she was the woman he wanted when she refused to act like a wife, without any of the security

The happy couple have been married five years, and Sami now teaches others her technique

'The intense pain of that rejection made me reflect on my life choices again and note that I had to wake up and do something about it if I wanted to have my dream of an amazing marriage and family fulfilled.

'I understood that I needed help if I was serious about making that goal come true for me.'

Sami spent time consulting with relationship stalwarts, read books about the dynamics of attraction and what makes men stay for the long term as well as observing the behaviour of women who were successful in love.

'It wasn't a studied thing they were strategically applying,' she explained. 'It was just that they valued themselves enough to not give themselves fully to a man, who hadn't given himself fully to them.

What is rotational dating? Perhaps, the only other down-side was that most of family and friends had no clue what 'rotational dating' was and they were quick to judge it as rotational sleeping. In our society, dating has come to be a very sexual activity and this causes a lot of unnecessary drama and attachment. In my work, I lay a lot of emphasis on how women should NOT be sleeping with men too quickly and rotational dating is all about going on harmless, 'connection dates'. These are 'getting to know you dates' with men, so that you are building an emotional bond over time and not getting trapped in intense sexual chemistry. When I first met Chris, he was rotational dating without knowing that he was rotational dating. Men do this organically. They want the best woman, after all, and why would they settle for the first person they meet, unless and until they feel they really desire and want her. Healthy, masculine men keep their options open until they decide to ask a woman for exclusivity. Chris was doing the same. He had many options, to be honest and yes, at times I did feel jealous at the start. But I knew that when a man is into you, all women will get left behind naturally and that is exactly what happened. Advertisement

It was the most natural thing for them to do. They did not want to give "husband benefits" to a man who hadn't given "wife benefits" to them.

'And somehow, to my surprise, healthy masculine men, understood this as well.

'I found this inspiring and realised that at heart, I too was the woman who believed in the institution of marriage and I wasn't going to settle for anything less.

'Plus, in the way I teach this system now to my clients, when a man knows he wants you forever, and you want him too, whats the problem?'

She then met Chris and after two-and-a-half months of dating he asked her to be his girlfriend.

The relationship guru said that women should get to know other men and go on dates, but not rush to have sex with them

'My response to this was: "I really like you too but I am not looking to be ANY man's girlfriend. I am looking for my forever man, a man who knows he wants me and only me, for the rest of his life.

'Until he knows that I am that woman for him, I would like to keep my options open and see other men for non-sexual connection dates."

'His first reaction was stunned silence. He didn't know what had hit him. I still remember we walked back home in complete silence that day.

Two days later, when we met again, he asked me many questions about how I saw the future and if girlfriend wasn't the normal next step, before committing to someone for life.

According to Sami, there's no need to feel guilty about rotational dating as it's something men do naturally without naming it

Sami insists that the process isn't about manipulating or forcing, but it's about attracting a man who you deserve

'I told him at that point of time that I didn't want to be test driven by many men, while they "made up their mind" about me.

'I wanted a man who knew that he wanted me and if I could be so clear-headed about wanting a man, he could return the favour too.

'Within the one month mark, I knew I had engaged and caught his attention, like no other woman had and from there on, it only continued to grow.

'The rest as they is history. Chris´s presence never dwindled in my life and with every passing day, I could feel how he totally knew that I was the one he wanted.'

After meeting Chris, Sami trained to her her certification as a relationship coach so that she could share her methods with others.

'Today, I am proud to say that over 95 of my clients have attracted their soulmates and got proposals in the last 2 years alone, using the system of Wunder soulmate attraction I teach,' she said.