Two of the many questions that define us as humans are “Are you a cat person or a dog person?” and “Would you like to own a werewolf?” Wonderful science now allows these queries to be easily answered, thanks to the lykoi, a new breed of cat said to act like a dog and resembling a werewolf enough to make you stop and say “Lupin? Is that you?”

Holy crap, those things are the definition of goth-cute! With short, shaggy fur which grows sparsely on the face and wide-set ears, these darling little enigmas might seem like freaks of nature, but they’re not: the unique lykoi traits are believed to be a natural genetic mutation from common short-hair feral cats. After obtaining a pair of non-related cats with the same mutations, veterinarian John Gobble began a breeding program (which we’re just going to assume involved some kind of ritual during the full moon.) Amazingly, the traits bred true, and Gobble soon had whole litters of were-kittens scampering about. Need another sweetener on these Buffy-appropriate bundles of meow? Their personalities are said to be more dog-like than cat-like. Affectionate and scent-driven hunters, they’re said to most resemble hounds in behavior, but retain enough natural independence that they can still amuse themselves if you’re too busy for a cuddle.

Of course, conscientious animal-lovers might have a few questions about the health and safety of these Tim Burton-esque cuties. Luckily, Dr. Gobble did his homework: extensive DNA testing showed that the lykoi mutations were a natural variation, and not the result of any disease or genetic damage that might result in health complications. Additionally, in the early stages of his breeding program, the vet continued to seek out feral cats from non-related litters with the same mutations, thus preventing possible complications from inbreeding.

While several breeding catteries have now been established for the lykoi, they remain a rarity with a price tag to match. Purebreds are currently fetching around $2500 as a designer breed. The breed is in the early stages of acceptance by breed-standard boards, so they’re likely to become more common, and thus less expensive, in the near future. This allows you plenty of time to finish building your Gothic manor and installing the appropriate amount of gargoyles/evil shrines in preparation for your werewolf kitten hoard. On the other hand, there’s no evidence (yet) to suggest you can use them to turn your existing cats into werewolves, so waiting for a price drop is probably a good idea!

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