What I Never Thought to Pray…

I’m broken.

Believe me when I tell you I did not want to start this article with those two words, but all evidence proves what I hate to admit: my heart is cracked wide open giving glimpses of who I was, who I am now, and who I’m becoming. Pain is spilling everywhere.

I don’t want you to think I cry every single moment of the day, because I don’t. I also don’t want you to think I’ve allowed myself to be defined by the heavy grief trying to consume me, no way. But there is a deep suffering causing me to show myself raw and real. However, while I’m fragile in some areas, I’m gaining strength in others.

As I sat in church Easter morning, my pastor preached a passionate sermon. He talked about the resurrection power of Jesus in everyday life. He said that even though the resurrection happened 2,000 years ago, when we believe in Christ, that same power works in us each and every day. (See Romans 8:11) He asked us to think about where we need resurrection power. For some, marriages need resurrected; for others, finances. It could be in any area, but the point is we have hope because of the resurrection power of Christ.

Listen, it’s not that I didn’t already know this. I’ve been educated in theology, and I believe the Bible to be infallible. I’ve fallen in love with Jesus, and I don’t love Him any less in the face of my family’s death. I know the same power that lives in Christ now lives in me. However, when it comes to my grief and the death of my family… It never occurred to me to ask Jesus to resurrect my broken heart. Heal it, yes. Awaken it from the dead making it breathe life again as if it’s the first time it’s ever beaten… well, I never thought to pray for my heart in those terms.

If I were sitting across the table from you right at this very moment and we were having this conversation face-to-face, you would hear passion in my voice. Why? Because I’m more zealous about the life Jesus gives than I am about anything else. Scripture sets my heart on fire. I’m not joking. God has molded me into who I am today through His Word. The Bible changed my life, and so now I’m going to concentrate on allowing it to change me some more. I’m praying resurrection power through my grief. I’m believing for a brand new heartbeat through the resurrection power of Jesus Christ.

I don’t know what it is you need today. I’m not privy to the ups and downs of your life, but whatever it is, I do know this: the resurrection power of Christ is available for you.

I’m broken for now, but I won’t be forever.

According to Merriam Webster, the first definition of broken is: violently separated into pieces. I’m confident in saying that definition sums up the last nine months of my life, but here’s the good news: Jesus came, He died, He resurrected, and He’s coming back. I miss having a mother, I miss my mother. I’ll never stop missing what it felt like to be her daughter. However, I will survive this misery ONLY because Jesus is alive, and He’s resurrecting my heart right at this very moment.

Have you ever thought about what you need Jesus to resurrect in your life?

If you want to leave a comment or send me a message, I’ll be happy to pray for you. I take praying for you very seriously.

Friend, the broken believer can’t stay broken, because the resurrection power of Christ is alive and well.

Can I get an amen?

Love,

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