Kenneth Copeland In A Real Pickle After Audience Member Names, Claims His Private Jet

DALLAS, TX—A man in the audience during a Kenneth Copeland “day of healing and victory” event yelled out to the televangelist, clearly and forcefully naming and claiming Copeland’s 2005 Cessna 750 Citation X in the name of Jesus, leaving Copeland in a real pickle, sources confirmed.

The 79-year-old was delivering a rousing message entitled “Victory Is Already Yours” when he reportedly invited the audience to cry out exactly what they were “believing God for,” promising that all their wishes had already been purchased for them by the blood of Jesus, and by naming and claiming the items they were, in fact, taking ownership of them.

So when a shrewd man in the front row cried out “I claim your $25 million Citation X in the name of Jesus!” in a voice so loud Copeland could not possibly ignore it, the preacher had no choice but to address him.

“Then it’s yours, young man, it’s yours! Glory to God!” he reportedly replied while wiping his brow, adding that the man should see him after the service in order to arrange the title transfer.

A crestfallen Copeland continued the message, visibly distracted as he reportedly tried to think of a way out of his conundrum, not wanting to give up his precious high-speed aircraft but unsure how to escape the situation without betraying the theology he has been championing for decades.

At publishing time, the televangelist was feeling a little better after remembering that he also owns a Cessna 550 Citation Bravo.

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