I’m bipolar. After nearly three years it’s out. It feels good, like taking your bra off at the end of the day.

[break]

It’s really simple, I was diagnosed in 2008 and it was kinda harsh. The meds made me feel like I’d taken rat sack and I was ever so vulnerable. These days I call that place skinless. The check out girl asks you how you are and you just want to cry. It’s like the normal barrier between you and the world is gone, skinless.

[break]

I am lucky. Mr Ask is forgiving, patient and becomes distraught when he cannot curb my pain. Mummy Ask is a psych nurse and has always walked beside me, never over riding me on decisions about my care. A Sister like a twin. The Bestie has heard me talk more shit than most people could speak in a lifetime and managed to withhold judgement while dispensing late night advice. They travel with me. They take the days where I scratch and bite at the world along with the days where I am sunshine personified. Both can be rough to live with when everyday life and it’s responsibilities are demanding some attention too.

[break]

I found a good GP, an excellent psychiatrist and tried a few meds before finding the right mix for me (Lithium & Seroquel).

[break]

It turned out that working a job really didn’t work for me. I tried very hard, for a long time to keep my job going but I just couldn’t manage. And that’s where Ask Sarah began. It became my job. Retiring (so to speak) at 30 was a massive loss to my sense of self. I still don’t know what to say when people casually enquire about my field of employ in social situations. These days I may say – blogger or lady who lunches. Somehow, saying I’m bipolar and can’t work is conversation killer.

[break]

I’m not going to detail my whole journey. With 1 in 5 people experiencing mental illness at some point in their lives, you may be pretty familiar with this stuff. I’m pretty sure some of you reading this are bipolar too. To give you some idea or reference point about my real life, I will post this lovely piece of prose, authored by Mummy Ask, along with a promise to answer any questions you have with honesty.

[break]