david bowie... COMICS?! [Dec. 23rd, 2005|11:52 am] found objects

found_objects

[ mistressindi ] My boyfriend inherited a stupidly huge collection of comic books, and mixed in with all the X-Men and Superman, we found something truly bizarre. I don't know how this was made, how its makers got permission, or how it got in there. And I'm posting Very Big Photos of this so you can read every bit of Very Brain-Numbing Text.



So let's take a whirlwind ride along with Ziggy Stardust in his latest comic-book adventure....







The cover. It appears the entire point of this cover was to ensure that nobody in their right mind would want to be seen buying or reading this. Fans this obsessed are not in their right minds, though.





I don't know what's with the bad grammar, and I don't know why the second face from top looks like the evil chick from Ghostbusters. Here we learn that David flies around the galaxy defeating badness. But he does it as his alter ego, Ziggy Stardust, who is very real to everyone except Bowie who has no idea this all is happening.





Bowie - er, Ziggy - decides the best way to defeat the psychic fuckstick dragon is to get a good mid-air rogering from Ozzy Osbourne.





Oh no! What is this?! The evil Elton John appears in his Biplane of Obviously Closeted Gayness!





Some other crap happens, and then wham bang boom, Ziggy turns into mild-mannered David once more. All these acid trips psychic space journeys are where he gets his inspiration, you know.





But what is this?! Some random fangirl Kate Bush (thanks, thegreatesthits





The Council of Superheroes. I think I can see Mick Jagger, Batman, and Freddie Mercury. I DO NOT UNDERSTAND, AND FURTHERMORE, I AM EMBARRASSED ON BEHALF OF EVERY POOR SCHMUCK WHO GOT PUT IN HERE.





It looks like a good kind of strange...





Apparently none of these psychotic fans have ever actually SEEN David Bowie. He's all kinds of skinny and non-buff.





At the end of the adventure, life returns to normal, David returns to the cocaine, and nobody has any idea what really happened. Much like his after-show parties, or so I've heard.





And the back cover, because... gawd. The horribleness, it's amazing.



Interestingly enough, they have other titles in this "series." About bands like KISS, Led Zeppelin, and... Motley Crue?! I don't want to know what goes into a comic about 80s hairmetal bands. I really do NOT want to know.