Studies show that twenty-somethings are more stressed and over-worked – and in turn, depressed and anxious about the future – than any other generation. As such, it’s not uncommon to find that people in their twenties don’t always treat each other that well. “Women that dominate culture today are pretty unfriendly,” says Sarah Jessica Parker in agreement, during a recent interview with Vanity Fair. “I like to remember that the women in Sex and the City were nice to each other.”Her comments have spurred many to vocalise parallels between Carrie’s original NYC foursome, and the urbanites that populate Lena Dunham’s Girls. As a case in point, a recent episode sees resident wallflower Shoshanna shed her timid demeanour and lash out at her friends, delivering low blows about their mental health issues, stints in rehab and subsequent whiny self-absorption.





These girls may look like adults, but their behaviour echoes schoolyard behaviour. Author Jeffrey Arnett would describe this as “emerging adulthood” – an extended period of “frequent change and exploration" that has emerged between teenaged and adult years due to demographic shifts. Rife with backhanded compliments, rumour-mongering and random bouts of exclusion, development experts say the turbulent friendships so common amongst teens are ‘rehearsals’ for adult intimacy, loyalty, and commitment. When we grow up and settle down, we begin to cut out the ‘frenemies’.Except now, that’s not the case. With the rehearsal for adulthood extended, it seems these ‘toxic’ friendships are coming along for the ride. But while “emerging adults” can be cruel like teenagers, they’re often sophisticated like adults, too. They’re better at maintaining friendships for longer, and four in five feel that the support of their friends is integral to eventual success. Ultimately, the the inoffensive ‘sweetness’ depicted in shows like Sex and the City is no longer top priority: friendship is defined by loyalty, resilience and an understanding that no one’s that nice all the time.