Edinson Volquez has a history of struggling in the playoffs. Before last night, the Royals pitcher was 0-3 in three postseason starts with the Reds, Pirates, and Royals, with a Jose Lima-esque 8.67 ERA. The power-hitting Blue Jays are the most offensively talented team left in baseball, yet Volquez shut them down last night. He only gave up two hits in six innings and they were both singles. The trick was following his heart and listening to his sexuality, baseball style.


It seemed the best way for Volquez to establish himself and quiet Toronto’s home run machine was for him to jam them up inside. However, he reversed course and pitched towards his arousal, which is away:

“I told him, ‘I feel sexy throwing down and away,’ “ Volquez said. “And he told me, ‘All right, let’s do it.’ He trusted me to do it that way.”


The Jays managed only one more hit, and Kansas City walked away with an emphatic victory. Their three hits are the fewest in franchise playoff history. Meanwhile, Salvador Perez smashed one to left field and the Royals’ offense was humming all game. The course of the game was a strange reversal for the two teams, as Kansas City’s starting pitchers entered the playoffs with the worst ERA among playoff teams and the Blue Jays hit the most homers of any team in the MLB. Playoff baseball is funny like that.

This afternoon, David Price and the Blue Jays face off against Yordano Ventura.

Photo via Getty