Reports are coming in that at the time of your arrival at home this weekend, Dad is requesting information as to whether the holes on your new pair of distressed jeans cost extra or if they were included with the purchase of the jeans.

“Did you pay for those holes or what? I just wanna know,” says your dad, while pulling another beer out of the cooler.

The answer is unclear, as you did pay for the jeans and the distressing process factors into the overall retail value of the jeans, but also this question is tiresome and you wish your dad would just get over the fact that your jeans have holes in them.

Unfortunately he has not.

“When I was a kid you could get a pair of jeans for ten dollars, and you’d get the whole jean. No holes.”

Once again, you lacked the energy to delve into the flawed logic of this argument and its lack of relevance to current fashion trends, so you instead just rolled your eyes.

Nevertheless, Dad persisted.

“Might wanna ask for your money back. They forgot to give you the knees!”