I first heard that Eat, Pray, Love author Elizabeth Gilbert was in love with her best friend of 15 years, from one of the members of my online support group for late life lesbians.

“She’s one of us!”

That joyful announcement was tempered with concerns about Rayya Elias’s terminal cancer diagnosis. But the recognition that Gilbert, 47, was indeed “one of us” echoed throughout our group--or tribe, as we call it - one that has swelled to almost 300 women from around the world in few months since I started it.

More and more, women are coming out in their 40s, 50s, 60s and beyond. Census-data analysis from UCLA's Williams Institute found that 36 per cent of women in their 40s with same-sex partners previously had been married to men. That number grew to more than half for lesbians in their 50s, and 75 per cent for those 60 and older.

No woman makes the decision to come out, when they’re well into their adult years, easily. I know I didn’t.