By Staff Writers

What operating system would famous German philosopher, Friedrich Nietzsche, use if he was alive today? That’s a question that a study has tried to answer, according to latest reports.

According to the study, that is apparently “not at all a waste of tax payer money”, Friedrich Nietzsche would most likely use the Gentoo operating system.

Professor Nile List explains: “We all know Nietzsche would not be one to run with the ‘herd’, and therefore would absolutely not be an Apple user. That we can be sure of. By the same token, Microsoft Windows is extremely widespread and powerful, and while we think Nietzsche may perhaps have a begrudging respect for all that Microsoft has achieved, the OS itself tends to make many assumptions. Assumptions on how you want to use the system, when you update, and what constitutes a good and bad program, according to the ubiquitous Windows Store.”

“Gentoo Linux, on the other hand,” he continued. “Assumes nothing of the kind. Other than that you like to do things your way, when you want to, even if it leaves you almost ripping your hair out in sheer despair and everyone thinking you’re kind of weird. But this leads us to one of the core tenants of Nietzsche’s philosophy. For example, one of his quotes goes as such: ‘He who climbs upon the highest mountains laughs at all tragedies, real or imaginary’. We can see Nietzsche was all about self-overcoming and victory over the struggles in life. We can also see he really likes to talk about mountains. Anyway, this all led to Gentoo in the study, for us.”

Professor List also explained that the Linux From Scratch (LFS) project had been a close runner-up for the researchers, but said that “not even Nietzsche in his late crazed years in the asylum would have considered using LFS as a full time OS”.

As for what social network the German philosopher would have used? Professor List believes the study may have indirectly led the researchers to an answer there, too.

“We believe GNU Social would be a logical fit,” he added. “After all, Nietzsche was all about solitude and being totally alone in one’s thoughts a lot of the time in the distant wilderness, so what better match than a social network that almost no one knows exists?”