BOSTON (CBS) — Say what you want about the New England sports media. Yes, we’re cynical and ruthless and often complain excessively about otherwise successful teams, or create problems that don’t exist. And when it comes to the Patriots, I would have trouble denying accusations of bias.

But when a New England team loses in its quest for a championship, we typically hold them accountable. For the better part of a decade, Tom Brady didn’t play well enough at the end of the playoffs to lead the Patriots to the elusive fourth Super Bowl, until he turned in his latest historic performance last season.

Brady received his share of the blame for many of the Patriots’ recent playoff losses. You can’t say the same for his future-Hall-of-Fame counterpart, Peyton Manning.

Before we get to the mighty mechanism that is the Perpetual Peyton Manning Excuse Machine (PPMEM), let me say this: Manning is easily one of the greatest quarterbacks to ever pick up a football. He has delivered countless amazing performances and often carried teams on his shoulders into the playoffs. And he’s not a complete choke artist, either – he’s had some great playoff performances, like when he waxed the Patriots in the 2013 AFC Championship and came back to win the 2006 AFC title.

Note: Hat tip to Jerry Thornton for coining “Peyton Manning Excuse Machine”. May have inadvertently taken that from him. Credit where credit’s due.

OK, disclaimer over. That said, it’s completely fair to say Manning hasn’t consistently lived up to his immortal status in big games. Why do fans and media feel the need to make excuses for him?

My favorite one is “Championships are a team accomplishment” – true, but quarterback is by far the most important position on the field and you’d only have a point if Peyton actually played well in all those losses. The numbers don’t lie – an 88.5 career playoff QB rating, 38-24 TD-INT ratio and 11-13 record are hardly impressive – and the constant appearances of the infamous “Manning Face” don’t pass the eyeball test, either.

Manning has been a mediocre playoff quarterback for most of his career, if not all of it, and his record is reflective of that. Say what you will about the undermanned Patriots losing to the Broncos in 2013 … there is zero chance Tom Brady and the Patriots roll over and take an ass-kicking like the Seahawks gave the Broncos in Super Bowl XLVIII.

It’s at best a little annoying, and at worst absolutely insufferable, to hear the utter lack of criticism for Manning himself following his playoff losses. It’s everybody else’s fault, not Peyton’s, right? It’s not like the entire offense is built around him or anything.

The 2015 season hasn’t even begun yet and the PPMEM is already adding more bricks to the wall of Peyton Manning excuses. Patriots fans, check out this list and rest assured that you have a quarterback who doesn’t make excuses for playing poorly. Peyton fans, go ahead and light me up in the comments if you want – but you know it’s true. Peyton loses his chance at being the GOAT when his playoff history pales in comparison to Brady and Joe Montana.

Here are the top 5 built-in excuses for Peyton Manning if the Broncos lose this season…

1. He can’t feel his fingertips

(Photo by Doug Pensinger/Getty Images)

You can see it already: Peyton throws up a few ducks in a playoff game, maybe ends up with an interception or two, and the team loses. But everyone says “Oh well, he didn’t really have a great feel for the ball. Still the GOAT.”

Manning told Peter King recently: “I can’t feel anything in my fingertips … . It’s crazy. I’ve talked to a doctor recently who said, ‘Don’t count on the feeling coming back.’ It was hard for me for about two years, because one doctor told me I could wake up any morning and it might come back. So you wake up every day thinking, Today’s the day! Then it’s not.”

Nerve damage is obviously a legit health concern and worth mentioning. But when you choose to take the field, injury talk goes out the window. If you play poorly, you play poorly – if you want to blame the fingertips, just stay off the field.

Not that Manning will make that excuse for himself. But he chose to put it out there, and now anyone desperate to explain away another playoff loss already has this one in their holster.

2. Gary Kubiak doesn’t run a pass-heavy offense

(Photo by Doug Pensinger/Getty Images)

Manning struggling to find a rhythm with the offense? Oh, it must be new head coach Gary Kubiak. He has a history of employing run-heavy offenses and that won’t change much, even with Manning at quarterback.

Next time Manning throws an interception in a playoff game, surely people will point to Kubiak’s questionable play-calling. It’s sort of like how Seahawks fans blame the Super Bowl XLIX loss on Pete Carroll and don’t blame Russell Wilson for a questionable throw or give any credit to Malcolm Butler for making an amazing play.

Kubiak doesn’t have a great postseason history as a coach, so if the Broncos can’t make the Super Bowl this year you can bet he will be the first to get run over by the Blame Train.

3. The team ‘can’t find their identity’

(Photo by Ezra Shaw/Getty Images)

This could be considered an off-shoot of excuse No. 2. What kind of offense will the Broncos have this year, combining a run-happy coach with one of the greatest passers in league history?

Denver just beat the 49ers in preseason action, and Manning actually did blame himself for some poor throws. But Kubiak stepped in and stomped out that fire as soon as it started: “I had us in a couple of tough situations that I’ve got to do a better job of with our quarterback. They’re things that we can fix.”

Translation: “Don’t blame our Hall-of-Fame quarterback, he doesn’t make mistakes like I do.”

4. “Protection Problems”

(Photo by Ezra Shaw)

Manning’s infamous “problems with protection” shot at his offensive line is well-documented, and it’s not the only time he’s taken subtle jabs at teammates. He’s a lot better about holding himself more accountable now than at the beginning of his career, but he hasn’t shaken it completely – remember when he targeted the scoreboard operator for affecting games? Last season?

I’m not saying Manning is a bad teammate. But he has had a history of trouble controlling himself when it comes time to dole out blame for whatever caused the latest Broncos loss. We’ll see what kind of explanation he has for Kubiak’s zone blocking scheme whenever that fails.

5. Too much chicken parm in the offseason

(Photo by Stephen Dunn/Getty Images)

I get it, Peyton, they taste so good. But no wonder you’re barfing on the sidelines (and on the field, figuratively). Why are you stuffing your face with chicken parms night after night?!

OK, this last one is a bad joke. In fact if you’re taking any of this too seriously you’re doing it wrong. But, I can’t resist poking fun at Manning’s endless goofy commercials. Brady gets his share of mockery for Uggs and other questionable endorsements, so it’s only fair.

Maybe the Broncos will win the Super Bowl this season and this whole list will be moot. But if they lose, get ready: the PPMEM is running strong and already in midseason form. What’s your favorite built-in excuse for Manning losses?

Matt Dolloff is a digital producer for CBSBostonSports.com and unabashed Patriots honk. Read more from Matt here and follow him on Twitter @mattdolloff.