Nation's Christians Excitedly Anticipate New Believer's First Doctrinal Error

U.S.—From the moment Kanye West announced his conversion to Christianity, the authenticity of the famous rapper’s faith has been the subject of much skepticism, with many of God’s most faithful followers anxiously awaiting the first opportunity to tear his faith to pieces.

West was previously known as a mainstream artist, singing songs promoting homespun ideals such as domestic violence, drug abuse, and rampant affairs. However, he strayed into controversy when he came out as a Trump supporter a few years ago. Now that he claims to repent of his explicit songs, there may be no chance of repairing his reputation.

“I suspected something wasn’t quite right when he released his overtly Christian album,” said Samara Jackson, who attends Open Arms Community Church. “A truly saved artist like TobyMac or Jeremy Camp would never debut their album at number one. It reeks of pride! I can only assume his belief in our loving and gracious God is insincere, and will prove it by viciously attacking the first doctrinal mistake this ‘new believer’ demonstrates.”

The wait for such an error may be short, as a recent statement from Kanye giving credit to God for the success of his album can only mean that he is fully dedicated to the dangerous prosperity gospel heresy, and therefore beyond redemption.

“Occasional theological discrepancies are normal for your average new convert,” tweeted Jim Hudson of Abundant Grace Fellowship, “but when a celebrity makes drastic life changes as a result of the resurrecting power of the Gospel, well, we expect a bit more from them.”

At publishing time, Kanye had also passingly compared the Trinity to a clover, revealing his clear allegiance to the heresy of modalism.

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