Jeffrey Epstein, accused of running a paedophilic sex ring, apparently committed suicide in his cell yesterday. Financial fixer to the super-rich, Epstein's disgusting choices apparently went unnoticed by the great and good people who attended his parties. Isn't it nice to be able to trust the moral judgment of top public figures?

Donald Trump once called him a 'terrific guy', prompting left-wing conspiracy theorists today to claim that the President murdered Epstein yesterday.

Bill Clinton praised Jeff's intellect and charitable work, prompting right-wing conspiracy theorists today to claim that the former President murdered Epstein yesterday.

It's beautiful, really, like yin and yang...

One old friend of Epstein's was Prince Andrew, Duke of York. The possibility that he had some hand in murdering Epstein has prompted general non-partisan conspiracy theorists (bless them) to claim today that there are lizards and a triangle with an eye in and the Pyramids are really the Earth's nipples and that will one day produce the milk in the phrase 'milk and honey', which is in the Bible, and that the honey is aliens from another dimension and Alex Jones is the new Jesus and Jesus was really, really, really the real deal and if Alex Jones can just convince a few more frustrated men that, er, the milk can't go off and the honey is the aliens and we've got to get rid of the aliens who are also bloody rich and have almost certainly got scales then maybe, just maybe, Epstein (that's a Jewish name) was killed by the QUEEN OF ENGLAND?!?!

In all seriousness, the world is full of secrets. Maybe the left- or right-wing conspiracy theorists have a point? Or maybe the lesson is that power corrupts regardless of political persuasion.

So let's keep an eye on the powerful, and be nice to each other. How else are we going to LOCK HER UP, LOCK THE QUEEN UP!???