THE OLD BOYS NETWORK

While the focus will be on Chelsea’s current players when they play Slavia Prague in Euro Vase tonight, it is assorted Stamford Bridge alumni who have come under the spotlight in the build-up to the game. Take Diego Costa, for example. No, take him. With the possible exception of those times he stamped on Emre Can, repeatedly slapped Laurent Koscielny, wiped his feet on Martin Skrtel’s chest, appeared to gob in the direction of referee Michael Oliver, played a central role in a mass brawl against Tottenham, flattened Adrián with a late challenge and fell out with Antonio Conte over a text message, the Spain international spent a tranquil, uneventful and largely successful few years at Chelsea, but appears to have developed something of an irritable streak since re-signing for Atlético Madrid.

In defeat against Barcelona last Saturday, he complained in the strongest possible terms about a decision made by referee Jesús Gil Manzano that displeased him and was red-carded for repeatedly manhandling the official while simultaneously traducing his mother using the kind of language that is thoroughly unsuitable for a family football email and would make even the most potty-mouthed docker blush. Sadly for him, Diego’s defence – that he was in fact shouting at himself and therefore technically sullying the good name of his own dear mum – fell on deaf ears and he today received an extended ban of eight games which rules him out for the rest of the domestic season. He’ll serve four matches on the Naughty Step for grabbing the official and another four for his profanity, presumably to be served in which ever order he sees fit.

Meanwhile in Switzerland, the season of another Chelsea pensioner seems to have come to an abrupt end, following FC Zurich’s announcement on Lazy Journalist Story Generator that they had decided to terminate the contract of Florent Malouda, a member of their coaching staff, “by mutual agreement”. Unfortunately for the 38-year-old Frenchman, the agreement in question seems to have been a lot more mutual on the club’s part than his, given his tweeted response of “Really I didn’t know that..??”

And so, finally, to Israel, where yet another Chelsea old boy, Yossi Benayoun, has announced his retirement from football at the age of 38. A surprise to all of us who presumed he’d packed in the game years ago, the Beitar Jerusalem midfielder announced his decision on social media. “The truth is that nothing I experienced over my career prepared me for the decision to stop playing,” he said. “Soccer has been a part of me from the day I learned to walk.” With four games of the season to go, confusion appears to reign over whether Benayoun’s retirement is effective immediately or his post was merely a signal of imminent intent. Unlike poor Diego and Florent, he does at least get to decide himself.

LIVE ON BIG WEBSITE

Join Paul Doyle at 8pm BST for minute-by-minute coverage of Arsenal 1-2 Napoli in Big Vase, while Nick Miller will be on hand for Slavia Prague 1-2 Chelsea.

QUOTE OF THE DAY: DISMAL EDITION

“The Football Club confirmed to the EFL that it is close to the Head of Terms stage with two groundshare options. Coventry City will now progress to working on finalising terms with the Clubs and Stadiums involved. While it remains our number one priority to stay, we can confirm that unfortunately the Ricoh Arena is not one of the venues above” – the sad saga of Coventry City takes another turn for the worse with the club announcing they won’t be at the Ricoh next season. A (hopefully temporary) groundshare outside the city seems the likeliest outcome.

The Ricoh Arena: not much but home for Coventry since 2005. Photograph: Ryan Browne/BPI/Rex/Shutterstock

FIVER LETTERS

“Ben North’s mail bigging up his birthday card from Linvoy Primus [yesterday’s Fiver letters] reminds me of the time many moons ago when I met some random Wycombe Wanderers fans in a pub in Dublin. Being three sheets to the wind and keen to impress my new friends, I spent about 25 minutes expressing my Championship Manager-related love for Wycombe (1994 edition – the best) and in particular their captain Jason Cousins. Somewhere between the eighth pint and the (Zaytoon) kebab on the way home I must have handed over my address to those fine gents as a month later I got a Wycombe programme in the post for my birthday signed by the entire team complete with a note from Jason. Sure he spelt my name wrong but fair play to him and to the lovely Wanderers who must have arranged it. Don’t tell anyone, but sometimes footballers and football fans can be really really nice” – Eoin Dunning.

“It’s strange. I write witty, erudite and interesting emails to the Fiver and nothing. I stoop to lightly insulting the utter blameless Martin Burke and I get published [yesterday’s Fiver letters]. Anyone would think that the Fiver was a shameless clickbait addict with the morals of an alcoholically deranged tapeworm. Oh, hold on ...” – Joe Mercer

“If Jonathan Kottler (yesterday’s bits and bobs) is so certain that words can’t have two connotations, then surely he should be wanting to proudly display Fulham’s true nickname and have COYC on his licence plate anyway?” – Sam Carpenter.

Send your letters to the.boss@theguardian.com. And you can always tweet The Fiver via @guardian_sport. Today’s winner of our prizeless letter o’the day is … Eoin Dunning.

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NEWS, BITS AND BOBS

Danny Rose has said he is grateful the support he has received after his comments about racism in football. “I had some great support throughout the week,” Rose said. “I hope that once the season’s finished people can sit down and discuss how to eradicate these unfortunate things that are happening.”

Carlo Ancelotti is back in London and feeling nostalgic ahead of Napoli’s Euro Vase clash with Arsenal. Ancelotti last faced Arsenal as Bayern Munich manager, when they won 10-2 on aggregate. “If I said I forgot, it’s not true,” he eyebrowed.

Paul Pogba is convinced Manchester United can still get past Barcelona in the Big Cup. “We saw a team we can beat,” he tooted. “Probably PSG will be in their minds, because they saw what we can do,” Pogba added, as Ernesto Valverde gaffer-taped his defenders’ hands to their sides.

Former Arsenal transfer guru Sven Mislintat has turned heads in the world of technical directorship by rocking up at Bundesliga strugglers Stuttgart. “It is a huge challenge and at the same time a great honour to work for a club like this,” he beamed.

And Samir Nasri’s stay at Taxpayers FC could be short-lived, with Manuel Pellegrini unsure if he will be offered a contract extension this summer. Nasri was due to come on against Chelsea at Stamford Bridge, only to suffer calf-twang while warming up. Oh Samir!

STILL WANT MORE?

Behind Slavia Prague’s eccentric chairman lies danger for Chelsea, writes Nick Ames.

In praise of the Cup Winners’ Cup, the competition that was never retained.

Solskjær needs to be more than just not-Mourinho at Manchester United, reckons floating-brain-in-a-jar Jonathan Wilson.

Manchester United’s defence proved no match for Messi’s footballing third eye, says Barney Ronay.

Louise Taylor runs through the key questions facing Phil Neville ahead of the England manager naming his squad for the Women’s World Cup.

Don’t fret over Harry Kane’s ankle, Spurs fans. Son Heung-min can fill those boots, writes Eni Aluko.

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