Last month I heard about The Beer Prayer, a beer-centric parody of The Lord’s Prayer. I read it, chuckled, was slightly confused on one point, and decided I could do better. And so I present

The Craft Beer Prayer

The original The Beer Prayer

Our Lager,

Which art in barrels,

Hallowed be thy drink. Thy kegdom come,

I will be drunk,

At home, as in the tavern. Give us this day, our foamy head,

and forgive us our spillages,

as we forgive those that spill against us,

and lead us not, into incarceration,

But deliver us from hang-overs, For thine is the beer,

The bitter and the lager,

Forever and ever! Barmen!

I couldn’t track down who created it to give them credit, it seems to have existed on the internet forever, and probably before then as well.

I decided to make The Craft Beer Prayer because the original Beer Prayer was good, but not great. The original Beer Prayer also seemed like “the Macro Beer Prayer.” How many breweries put a lager in barrels anymore? This one also leans more towards drunkenness than the moderation craft beer enthusiasts should encourage. Foamy head, spillages, and incarceration just didn’t sound great to me.

As mentioned, both of these are a rip on

The Lord’s Prayer

Our Father, which art in heaven,

Hallowed be thy Name. Thy Kingdom come.

Thy will be done in earth,

As it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread.

And forgive us our trespasses,

As we forgive them that trespass against us.

And lead us not into temptation,

But deliver us from evil. For thine is the kingdom,

The power, and the glory,

For ever and ever. Amen.

Hopefully, I didn’t too horrible offend anyone’s religion with this. It’s all meant as good fun!