Alcohol is a funny thing. For thousands of years man has engaged in drinking to excess but it hasn’t been until the last hundred years or so that the subject of alcoholism and recovery from such has been actively explored and encouraged. Even still we are getting over long-held societal beliefs that state things like “addiction is a moral failing.” People are beginning to recognize the true dangers of alcohol and how it fits into all our lives — especially in today’s health conscious world. We understand that alcohol is bad for us, and can lead to serious problems, so why do we take the risk?

Of course there are dozens of reasons why one might turn to the bottle, but I firmly believe that most are rooted in the idea of control. We live in an unpredictable, chaotic place in which we must constantly adapt. Every day we try desperately to survive, and more than that, to thrive. But life gets in the way. Maybe our boss asks us to work overtime, or our partner is emotionally distant for some reason, or an unexpected car repair bill has come up that you really don’t have the money for.

It can all be a bit much at times. We all have problems, and most of us feel we have no way of addressing them. We are told to work hard and good things will happen to us, but what about when they don’t? What about when the reality of the situation is that you work hard all the time, and nothing ever really comes from it? We feel helpless in those moments, as if we have no control despite our best efforts. Everyone feels this way at some point.

Try as we might, sometimes taking a deep breath or trying to rationalize our situation doesn’t cut it; sometimes the weight of the world is simply too much too handle, and we feel we have no choice but to seek comfort externally — and so we do. We binge eat, or we gamble, or we drown our sorrows at the local dive. Alcohol, like many other vices, can be a rare constant in an ever changing existence of endless sensory and emotional input. No matter what changes or how bad things get, alcohol makes us a promise: drink me and you will feel relief. You will feel strong, as if you are in control. I will make your problems disappear, or at least strike them from your memory for the evening.

This control is an illusion. We drink because it makes us feel like we have some power over our lives. When we feel bad, we can drink and we know it will make us feel better. That is, until it doesn’t. Alcohol is very good at this, and no one will tell you about it before it happens: first, you enjoy the comfort of drinking’s embrace, then you become accustomed to it, and then there is no way to feel comfort but in the bottle. Suddenly you find yourself trapped.

Booze is the easy way out. It’s no wonder that people choose to drink. Imagine that you lived in a remote cabin in the woods and were forced to hunt and garden all your own food. It is an arduous task and takes up a great deal of your time, but you are usually successful and have never gone hungry. One day, a giant red button appears in your cabin, and when pressed, a delicious, filling meal appears magically. It seems too good to be true, but why not take advantage of it? As time goes on, you begin to rely on the button. You realize your aim with a gun is not as good as it was before, and on the rare occasions you go hunting, you have lost your stealth and ability to go undetected. You could work on these skills, but why try when you can simply go home and press the big red button for food?

One day, you press the button and nothing happens. A sense of dread fills you, and in a panic you press the button over and over. Finally, a meal appears, but it is not the luxurious banquet you are used to. A simple sandwich materializes. The next week, it is oatmeal. You realize that you have become far too dependent on the button, and that perhaps it will stop producing even the meager oatmeal soon. But it seems too late — your hunting skills have already deteriorated, and you neglected to care for your garden because of the surplus of magical food. You are stuck between a rock and a hard place. You question why you ever came to rely on the button in the first place.

This is the illusion alcohol sells to people without proper coping mechanisms: press this button and you will be fed. Neglect your problems, and ignore them by way of temporary escape. Procrastinate on true happiness.

There is a great secret to this all: you do not have to push the button in the first place. Our problems are not curses to be damned — they are challenges that fill our lives with joy and accomplishment. If you can learn to shift your perspective, anything is possible. Imagine yourself as the hunter in the cabin. There is no need to lament your fortune in having to seek out your own food. Be grateful! It is a great gift to be able to do for ourselves. There is always hardship, and we cannot control that, but this is good!

How boring would life be were it always predictable, stable, and secure? The vastness of choice available to us and the consequences involved are what gives life meaning. Risk and reward is inherent in everything we do, but you can learn to view this as great opportunity as opposed to a shackling force.

This is where we find the will to thrive. This is where the stress imposed on us by our careers and family can be put into perspective. We are very small in the grand scheme of things. Ten years from now you won’t remember whether you worked 55 or 60 hours that week. What you will remember is how you faced the challenges in your life. Are they a series of good and bad things happening to you, or rigors of an exciting life? Do you view them as lessons and growing experiences, or as inconveniences?

This advice is simple, and has been repeated a million times in a million ways: the way you view the events of your life determines the mark that they will leave on you. If you want your world to be beautiful and engaging, you can simply choose to see it that way. This is a universal truth that can be said over and over, but I find people do not hear and understand it until they are ready. Perhaps by writing this I can contribute one more viewpoint. If my take can inspire even the tiniest bit of inspiration in one person, then I will have succeeded.

Life is an adventure and it is possible to live that way simply by telling yourself that you are. Our identity is shaped by the way we describe ourselves. Close your eyes and think about yourself — what do you see? If you don’t see a happy person, imagine that you do. Even if it doesn’t match, envision it that way. Tell yourself you will be happy and that good things will continue to happen if you keep an open mind. You’ll be amazed how often it comes true. When we think positively, positive things begin happen to us. Life is a steady progression of input and we get to decide how we filter that into our own experience.

This is where ultimate control exists. It is not in the money we make, the company we keep, or the string of incidents that make up our daily dialog — it’s in the way we view this existence and our place within it. We can choose to look at the good in things, or we can hide from the way they appear to be on the surface. If you want to live a life where you exert false control by drinking, you can. No one can stop you or force you to think positively. But for those who desire true control over their lives, there is another option entirely: give up your control. Accept that it is an illusion, and that the world will go on regardless. Begin to control your life by shifting your perspective. Only then will you begin to feel that you have personal power.