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--> A midday take on what's happening in politics and how to have a sense of humor about it.*

*Ha. Haha. Hahah. Sniff. Haha. Sniff. Ha--breaks down crying hysterically.

The Hill's 12:30 Report — From New Hampshire — Buttigieg, Sanders look to carry momentum to Granite State | Buttigieg with slight Iowa lead after latest results | Early winners and losers | Highlights from tense State of the Union | Pelosi defends ripping up Trump's speech | Pence calls her move 'a new low' | Senate acquittal vote set for 4 pm | Doug Jones to vote to convict | Taco Bell Cantina opening in DC

ON THE CAMPAIGN TRAIL IN NEW HAMPSHIRE

Pete Buttigieg Pete ButtigiegBogeymen of the far left deserve a place in any Biden administration Overnight Defense: Woodward book causes new firestorm | Book says Trump lashed out at generals, told Woodward about secret weapons system | US withdrawing thousands of troops from Iraq A socially and environmentally just way to fight climate change MORE slipped up in New Hampshire and yet, I totally get it:

Via CNN's DJ Judd, during a campaign stop in New Hampshire yesterday after traveling overnight from Iowa, former South Bend, Ind. Mayor Pete Buttigieg (D) tried to recite New Hampshire's "Live Free or Die" state motto, but slipped up and instead said, "Live or Fry."

When he realized the slip: "I'm still thinking of the pizza place we just left. We didn't get a lot of sleep last night."

And I get that.

Photo from Judd: http://bit.ly/2OvuN7S

OTHER SIGHTS AND SOUNDS FROM PETE BUTTIGIEG EVENTS:

Chant, chant, chant: "This crowd waiting for [Buttigieg] in Manchester, New Hampshire, is being encouraged to join chants of 'President Pete'" (Via The Times's Henry Zeffman) http://bit.ly/2UyifRf

Oh man, I can't unsee this: CNN's Andrew Kaczynski tweeted, "How many points would Pete be winning by if he had long hair and a goatee?" Photoshopped photo of Buttigieg: http://bit.ly/3996X9S

Overhead shot of a Buttigieg event yesterday in Manchester, N.H.: http://bit.ly/2Sjkjd4

FROM WARREN'S NASHUA EVENT THIS MORNING:

Warren on the impeachment vote this afternoon: "Usually I can hang around forever to take selfies, but today, I'm headed to Washington to vote for the impeachment of Donald Trump."

Photo of Warren taking questions from the crowd: http://bit.ly/2v9XVLm

A baby Wonder Woman: A toddler tried running towards the stage, dressed as Wonder Woman. Her mom caught her quickly but it was very cute. Photos: http://bit.ly/2tAwJVA

The recurring theme at Warren's event: Health care

Warren spent a good chunk of her remarks sharing her life story: She mentioned "husband No 1" and paused, "Hint: it's never good when you have to number your husbands." http://bit.ly/31teJsu

On Trump's State of the Union address last night: "For Donald Trump to stand up last night and say he wants to protect people with pre-existing conditions..." She paused and said, "well, at this point anyone who listens to what he says rather than what he does..." http://bit.ly/2v93vgI

A question from an attendee: "This man tells Warren he is scared. He says he fears a 'sociopathic narcissist' like Trump 'cheating' again, guesses Trump will be acquitted today, and fears that Donald and Melania Trump Melania TrumpNew Melania Trump statue replaces one that burned to the ground in Slovenia The Hill's 12:30 Report - Presented by Facebook - Latest with the COVID-19 relief bill negotiations Ivana Trump on Melania as first lady: 'She's very quiet, and she really doesn't go to too many places' MORE will be 'king and queen.'" (Via CNN's MJ Lee) Video: http://bit.ly/2H9y4G9

Warren’s famous selfie line: Here's video of the line to take a selfie with her: http://bit.ly/2vQPEfr

SIGHTS AND SOUNDS FROM Bernie Sanders Bernie SandersSenate Republicans signal openness to working with Biden Hillicon Valley: DOJ indicts Chinese, Malaysian hackers accused of targeting over 100 organizations | GOP senators raise concerns over Oracle-TikTok deal | QAnon awareness jumps in new poll Schumer, Sanders call for Senate panel to address election security MORE'S MILFORD RALLY:

Video of a protester getting escorted out of a Bernie Sanders rally: It was unclear what he was protesting. Any guesses? Watch: http://bit.ly/2upj97R

This baby wishes the campaign rally was during normal business hours: http://bit.ly/3bgx54v

Spotted standing in the back of a Bernie Sanders event: Jennifer Palmieri, Hillary Clinton Hillary Diane Rodham ClintonBarr criticizes DOJ in speech declaring all agency power 'is invested in the attorney general' Virginia Democrat blasts Trump's 'appalling' remark about COVID-19 deaths in 'blue states' The Hill's Campaign Report: Biden asks if public can trust vaccine from Trump ahead of Election Day | Oklahoma health officials raised red flags before Trump rally MORE's communications director during her 2016 presidential campaign. Photo: http://bit.ly/2OtI2Gf

Nice wheels: Here is a decked-out Sanders van. By the way, it smelled like wet paint just passing it in a parking lot. Photo: http://bit.ly/2OrroXB

By the way: Sanders kept the same campaign logo as his 2016 presidential bid. Photo for reference: http://bit.ly/3bgx54v And a photo from 2016: https://cnn.it/2OrLbpR

Lol, this dad gets how it works: A father handed a Sanders sign to his kid at the rally and says "here, hold this while you play so photographers take pictures of you." Photo -- it worked: http://bit.ly/2UruxdX

SIGHTS AND SOUNDS FROM Joe Biden Joe BidenThe Memo: Warning signs flash for Trump on debates Senate Republicans signal openness to working with Biden National postal mail handlers union endorses Biden MORE'S NEW HAMPSHIRE SWING:

Biden's team did a great job at getting people to wear stickers: Here's the line to get into his Somersworth, N.H., event. Photo: http://bit.ly/2vbnSKb

Hello and welcome!: Former Vice President Biden greeted the Nashua, N.H., crowd yesterday: "God, it's good to be in New Hampshire." Photo of the crowd: http://bit.ly/2SmHZgu

WHERE TO FIND THE CANDIDATES TODAY:

Pete Buttigieg: Concord

Bernie Sanders: Concord

Elizabeth Warren Elizabeth WarrenNo new taxes for the ultra rich — fix bad tax policy instead Democrats back away from quick reversal of Trump tax cuts It's time for newspapers to stop endorsing presidential candidates MORE: Concord, Nashua and Manchester

Joe Biden: Somersworth and Manchester

Amy Klobuchar Amy KlobucharEPA delivers win for ethanol industry angered by waivers to refiners It's time for newspapers to stop endorsing presidential candidates Biden marks anniversary of the Violence Against Women Act, knocks Trump and McConnell MORE: Concord

Andrew Yang Andrew YangDoctor who allegedly assaulted Evelyn Yang arrested on federal charges The Hill's Campaign Report: Biden weighs in on police shootings | Who's moderating the debates | Trump trails in post-convention polls Buttigieg launches his own podcast MORE: Concord, Milford, Keene and Manchester

Tom Steyer Tom SteyerTV ads favored Biden 2-1 in past month Inslee calls Biden climate plan 'perfect for the moment' OVERNIGHT ENERGY: Trump administration finalizes plan to open up Alaska wildlife refuge to drilling | California finalizes fuel efficiency deal with five automakers, undercutting Trump | Democrats use vulnerable GOP senators to get rare win on environment MORE: Concord and Manchester

Tulsi Gabbard Tulsi GabbardRepublicans call on DOJ to investigate Netflix over 'Cuties' film Hispanic Caucus campaign arm endorses slate of non-Hispanic candidates Gabbard says she 'was not invited to participate in any way' in Democratic convention MORE: Keene

Deval Patrick Deval PatrickRalph Gants, chief justice of Massachusetts supreme court, dies at 65 It's as if a Trump operative infiltrated the Democratic primary process Top Democratic super PACs team up to boost Biden MORE: Concord

Michael Bennet Michael Farrand BennetOVERNIGHT ENERGY: House Democrats tee up vote on climate-focused energy bill next week | EPA reappoints controversial leader to air quality advisory committee | Coronavirus creates delay in Pentagon research for alternative to 'forever chemicals' Senate Democrats demand White House fire controversial head of public lands agency Next crisis, keep people working and give them raises MORE: Lebanon

Bill Weld William (Bill) WeldRalph Gants, chief justice of Massachusetts supreme court, dies at 65 The Hill's Campaign Report: Biden visits Kenosha | Trump's double-voting suggestion draws fire | Facebook clamps down on election ads Biden picks up endorsements from nearly 100 Republicans MORE: Concord and Nashua

How to follow along: Check NECN's candidate tracker: http://bit.ly/3bdXgJ9

It's Wednesday -- six days until the New Hampshire primary! Filing from Elizabeth Warren's campaign stop in Nashua, N.H., I'm Cate Martel with a quick recap of the morning and what's coming up. Send comments, story ideas and events for our radar to cmartel@thehill.com -- and follow along on Twitter @CateMartel and Facebook.

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FROM THE IOWA CAUCUSES

I'm trying my very hardest not to make New Hampshire versus Iowa jokes:

The Iowa Democratic Party has released 71 percent of precincts from Monday's caucuses.

THE RESULTS:

With 71 percent of precincts reporting:

Pete Buttigieg: 26.8 percent

Bernie Sanders: 25.2 percent

Elizabeth Warren: 18.4 percent

Joe Biden: 15.4 percent

Amy Klobuchar: 12.6 percent

Andrew Yang: 1.0 percent

Tom Steyer: 0.3 percent

Michael Bloomberg Michael BloombergThe Hill's 12:30 Report - Presented by Facebook - Latest with the COVID-19 relief bill negotiations The Memo: 2020 is all about winning Florida The Hill's Morning Report - Sponsored by The Air Line Pilots Association - Trump, Biden renew push for Latino support MORE: 0.0 percent

Tulsi Gabbard: 0.0 percent

Deval Patrick: 0.0 percent

Michael Bennet: 0.0 percent

Live election results and graphics from The New York Times: https://nyti.ms/39ducQq

EARLY WINNERS AND LOSERS:

Winners: Buttigieg (D), Sen. Sanders (I-Vt.), President Trump Donald John TrumpBarr criticizes DOJ in speech declaring all agency power 'is invested in the attorney general' Military leaders asked about using heat ray on protesters outside White House: report Powell warns failure to reach COVID-19 deal could 'scar and damage' economy MORE and New Hampshire.

Mixed: Sens. Warren (D-Mass.) and Klobuchar (D-Minn.)

Losers: The Iowa caucuses, Former Vice President Biden and The Democratic Party

Reasoning for each from The Hill's Niall Stanage: http://bit.ly/2vKgd5V

HAPPENING TODAY

If it does not fit, you must acquit!:

At 4 p.m. EST today, the Senate is expected to vote on the two articles of impeachment against President Trump.

What to expect: Republicans are unified about acquitting the president and are looking for Senate Democrats to defect from their party.

Preview from The New York Times's Catie Edmondson: https://nyti.ms/2UymNXP

Livestream of the 4 p.m. vote: https://cs.pn/2GXHHHC

New this morning -- Doug Jones is not jumping the fence:

Sen. Doug Jones (D-Ala.), the vulnerable senator who has been seen as one of the Democrats who could vote with Republicans to acquit, said he will vote to convict President Trump.

Jones said in a statement: "After many sleepless nights, I have reluctantly concluded that the evidence is sufficient to convict the President for both abuse of power and obstruction of Congress."

FROM TRUMP'S STATE OF THE UNION ADDRESS

Short Trump: 'I hope you missed 2016 because we're back, baby':

An emboldened President Trump gave his annual State of the Union address last night to a highly partisan crowd of loyal Republicans any infuriated Democrats. http://bit.ly/380F4AV

Interesting analysis: Via Politico's John F. Harris: "The strangest State of the Union ever: Trump zigs to the right, zags to the center in a speech that broke all the rules." His full analysis: https://politi.co/2RYgQ4C

TAKEAWAYS:

Trump-Pelosi tensions boil over again The chamber was polarized -- even for the Trump era Trump was totally in his element Trump's reality show State of the Union Trump leaves impeachment for another day

Context and details for each from The Hill's Brett Samuels and Morgan Chalfant: http://bit.ly/2GT4Ef4

GETTING TRACTION -- WE LIVE IN A REALITY SHOW:

Speaker Nancy Pelosi Nancy PelosiPowell warns failure to reach COVID-19 deal could 'scar and damage' economy Overnight Defense: House to vote on military justice bill spurred by Vanessa Guillén death | Biden courts veterans after Trump's military controversies Intelligence chief says Congress will get some in-person election security briefings MORE (D-Calif.) dramatically tore up her copy of Trump's address. http://bit.ly/2GUpkTR

This does not look planned to me. See for yourself -- watch: http://bit.ly/39enmd5

Reaction from Vice President Pence: "I didn't see her do it; I found out just a few moments later. And I thought it was a new low," Pence said on "Fox & Friends." http://bit.ly/380QPad

SIGHTS AND SOUNDS FROM THE HOUSE CHAMBER:

How the chamber fits everyone: "For State of the Union, inside the House Chamber there are:

445 Fixed chairs on the [floor]

140 temporary chairs

660 seats in the public gallery

Room for 250/300 to stand" http://bit.ly/2Osxl6F

Seated near the front: "Trump's former 2020 rivals are also sitting pretty close to the front: Sens. Cory Booker Cory Anthony BookerDemocratic lawmakers call for an investigation into allegations of medical neglect at Georgia ICE facility Black Voters Matter Fund deploying voter outreach caravans in 12 states to drive turnout Philanthropist Susan Sandler investing 0M in social justice organizations MORE, Kamala Harris Kamala HarrisNational postal mail handlers union endorses Biden The Hill's Campaign Report: Biden asks if public can trust vaccine from Trump ahead of Election Day | Oklahoma health officials raised red flags before Trump rally Jim Carrey to play Biden on 'Saturday Night Live' MORE and Kirsten Gillibrand Kirsten GillibrandSuburban moms are going to decide the 2020 election Jon Stewart urges Congress to help veterans exposed to burn pits The Hill's Campaign Report: 19 years since 9/11 | Dem rival to Marjorie Taylor Greene drops out | Collin Peterson faces fight of his career | Court delivers blow to ex-felon voting rights in Florida MORE." (Via U.S. News's Lisa Hagen) http://bit.ly/39bVNl0

^ Oh, I wish I knew what they were talking about: Here's a photo Sens. Harris (D-Calif.) and Gillibrand (D-N.Y.) talking before the address: http://bit.ly/2Ow5GC5

*Hmm, think, think, think* 'Soo, how's the weather on your side of Washington...?': Pelosi and Vice President Pence looked like they had nothing to talk about. Photo: http://bit.ly/2ujZNkk

The White House hosted TV news anchors for a pre-State of the Union lunch: Photos from C-SPAN's Howard Mortman: http://bit.ly/2SiJ4pD

Photo of Trump headed to the Capitol: http://bit.ly/2SnASEu

Some Democratic women wore white: Here's a photo: http://bit.ly/3baZn0d

I'm not crying, you're crying: Here are photos of when a military father and husband surprised his family at President Trump's State of the Union address. Photos: http://bit.ly/397zSez

NOTABLE TWEETS

I hope you still get to use your fun facts, Steve :/

A lament from @SteveKornacki on the lack of data from Iowa tonight. #TrackingKornacki pic.twitter.com/afVtlgmfLO — MSNBC (@MSNBC) February 4, 2020

Watch -- he seems SO sad: http://bit.ly/3bgdzp5

Ouch:

Why yes I will be taking this shirt home with me. pic.twitter.com/LTCIknr3bY — Dan Merica (@merica) February 4, 2020

ON TAP

The House and Senate are in. President Trump is in Washington, D.C. Vice President Pence is in Philadelphia for the day.

10:20 a.m. EST: Vice President Pence left for Philadelphia.

12:30 p.m. EST: President Trump has lunch with Defense Secretary Mark Esper Mark EsperOvernight Defense: Trump hosts Israel, UAE, Bahrain for historic signing l Air Force reveals it secretly built and flew new fighter jet l Coronavirus creates delay in Pentagon research for alternative to 'forever chemicals' Oldest living US World War II veteran turns 111 Overnight Defense: US marks 19th anniversary of 9/11 attacks | Trump awards Medal of Honor to Army Ranger for hostage rescue mission | Bahrain, Israel normalizing diplomatic ties MORE.

4 p.m. EST: The Senate votes on the articles of impeachment. The Senate's full schedule today: http://bit.ly/2tA3HFA

4:30 -- 5:30 p.m. EST: First and last votes in the House. The House's full schedule today: http://bit.ly/2RZxhgX

5 p.m. EST: Vice President Pence speaks at a Women for Trump event in Camp Hill, Pa.

7:20 p.m. EST: Vice President Pence lands back in Washington.

WHAT TO WATCH

12:35 p.m. EST: Vice President Pence delivers remarks at the Saint Francis de Sales School in Philadelphia. on school choice. Livestream: http://bit.ly/387u70w

4 p.m. EST: The Senate impeachment vote. Livestream: https://cs.pn/2GXHHHC

NOW FOR THE FUN STUFF...

Today is World Nutella Day!

Celebrate good times, come on!:

Via WTOP Radio's Jeff Clabaugh, a Taco Bell Cantina is coming to the Columbia Heights neighborhood of Washington, D.C., this spring. What we know: http://bit.ly/2Ov6xD7

And because you made it this far, here's a happy golden retriever puppy who just wants to say hello: http://bit.ly/2uahjaV