Pack your bag, kiss your pet goodbye and follow me. We’re about to take the sand storm train to Cancerville. All summer long, our government has been piling up garbage next to our homes, shagging nature in the ass and making a Lebanese adaptation of the “La cigale et la fourmie” story. Nouhad el Machnouk was partying in Mykonos and throwing some panty peeling dance moves on the floor, Mohamad el Machnouk was trying to evade the environmental crisis like u would try to avoid your ex-girlfriend while Mother Nature was sitting back having a drink and observing our 128 political douchebags push our fate off the cliff down the Armageddon valley.

Today, Mother Nature lost its shit, rolled up its sleeves and decided to take charge of this whole thieves loaded, values corroded country called Lebanon.

To put that sentence into its deserved context, let’s use the visual aids below often referred to as “Pictures

As you can see. Mother Nature ran out of patience with all the environmental crimes we- as Lebanese- committed; all the actions we didn’t take; all the problems we failed to solve; all the causes we didn’t fight for. And if you open your window and listen carefully u’ll most likely hear Nature screaming “Fuck it”

Lebanese are the most insane species. We worship an invisible God and slaughter a visible Nature, without realizing that this Nature we slaughter is the invisible God we worship*

We sit at home thinking that this crisis too shall pass. You’re absolutely right. It will pass but this time through your lungs and the lungs of the ones you love. If you’re sitting in a high tower or a remote unaffected town pretending that you’re safe, think again. Nature is known as the “Great Equalizer”. It doesn’t differentiate between Old and Young, Christian and Muslim, Rich and Poor. Viruses will crawl through your water pipeline, in the air, under your kids’ skin. Sooner or later it will affect all of us.

If it rains in the next weeks, that day will be more damaging than dropping a Napalm Bomb over Lebanon. The floods will carry the toxic garbage underground and impact all water reservoirs. The sea, the rivers, the water you shower with, the air, the bread, the rain, the fruits, the fish, the milk, the soil, the vegetables..they will all carry new diseases into the safety of your home. No one will be spared.

This is not a matter of politics. This isn’t a religious issue. It’s not a popularity contest or a hashtag war. It’s not about being with civic movements or against it. Being with political parties or against them.

This is about survival. Today this sand storm is a final sounding alarm for us to wake up. And after it, comes the rain. Only this time, it won’t wash away our sins, but soak us in them.

So keep your ego and differences at home and get your ass down the streets to push the government to find a fast solution for the garbage crisis. If your health is not worth fighting for then what is ?

Beirut, you stink lately. It’s time for a shower

Beirut Unforgiven