World's tallest church being eroded by peeing, vomiting vandals

A view of Ulm Minster. A view of Ulm Minster. Photo: Ullstein Bild/ullstein Bild Via Getty Images Photo: Ullstein Bild/ullstein Bild Via Getty Images Image 1 of / 8 Caption Close World's tallest church being eroded by peeing, vomiting vandals 1 / 8 Back to Gallery

This is why we can't have nice things.

Employees at Ulm Minster, a church in Germany with the world's tallest church tower, are begging the public to stop urinating and vomiting on the tower's stone base. Building maintenance head Michael Hilbert told the Suedwest Presse that the bottom of the tower is "coated with urine and vomit" and that the stone base is being eaten away by the human waste.

The city of Ulm tried doubling the fines for public urinators to 100 euros, but the fine has had little effect. A city spokesman said it was hard to catch people in the act despite increased police patrols in the area.

The tower of Ulm Minster stretches 530 feet into the sky. Construction on the magnificent church began in 1377 but wasn't finished until May 31, 1890. It survived the Allied bombing of Ulm late in World War II — over 80-percent of the city center was destroyed — but now is in peril due to peeing idiots.

Church officials hope the police will help further in their preservation quest and that the city will start providing free public toilets during events in the church square.

"This is about preserving law and order," Hilbert says.