We tend to treat only dating people you have oppressive power over as creepy, right?

A cis person who only dates trans people is probably a chaser.

An abled person who only dates disabled people is a creep and probably a fetishist

A thin person who dates only fat people and excludes other thin people as potential partners is creepy and probably has a fetish.

A white person who doesn’t date other white people but dates people of color is also a creep and is probably acting on a fetish.

Why, then, do we act like a man who exclusively seeks women as partners to the exclusion of other men is acting on an immutable preference? Why does he get the benefit of the doubt that he is not acting on a fetishized belief of what women are? Why is having a strong preference for partners down this specific power dynamic considered natural and beyond challenge?

Why is the word for this kind of man “heterosexual” or “straight” and not “creepy dude who only dates women”?