AUSTIN, TX—Expressing his concern that the relationships may be based on obligation rather than real friendship, local man Alec Crawford told reporters Tuesday that he was beginning to think that the only reason people were hanging out with him was because they were all on the same jury. “Sure, we all get lunch together and we’ve been pretty much inseparable for the last couple weeks, but there’s some part of me that can’t help but feel they’re only putting up with me because they’re legally required to do so,” said Crawford, admitting that he couldn’t quite shake the sense that they never would have met up at that bar the night before if they weren’t all sequestered in the same hotel for the duration of the trial. “Everybody has been cool, but there have been little tip-offs here and there that they might be more interested in their civic duty than nurturing the special bond we’ve formed. For example, a lot of them still refer to me as ‘Juror 4,’ and while they’re always happy to talk about what we might be getting for dinner that evening, as soon as I start trying to make plans for a weekend trip after the trial ends, everyone’s suddenly super vague and non-committal.” Crawford also noted that he had no reservations about his blossoming friendship with the defense attorney who had eagerly engaged him in numerous late-night conversations about how his client was innocent.

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