If you are in a committed relationship and you have never used sex toys before, there is a good chance that the idea of whipping out a dildo in front of your partner is really scary. What will he or she think? Will he or she think I’m weird? Will he or she enjoy it? The truth of the matter is that introducing sex toys can be daunting. This is why it can help to have a guide for this introduction. The key here is to make it a casual introduction – not an awkward, rushed one.

Here is how to introduce sex toys to your partner.

Step 1Purchase a Few Introductory Sex Toys: When you want to introduce sex toys to your partner, be sure that you have a few toys that you can start off with. If you are introducing sex toys to your boyfriend, I recommend a cock ring, because it is something that he can enjoy too. If you are introducing toys to your girlfriend, I recommend a vibrator – you want it to be a mutual experience.

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Step 2Unwrap The Sex Toys and Put Them In Your Bedside Drawer: When you get the sex toys in the mail, be sure that you very inconspicuously unwrap them and hide them in your bedside drawer. If you introduce a box with a toy inside it to your partner, it will be a lot less enticing. This is especially the case if the box doesn’t have anything really descriptive on it. When you whip out the toy, you want it to be all out in the open. Plus, this will cut down the time it takes to run into the kitchen, grab a pair of scissors and open the toy. If things are getting hot and heavy in the bedroom, you will want to have the toy ready.

Step 3Have The Talk: Ideally, you want to be comfortable in bed with your partner. You don’t want to have anywhere to go and you don’t want to be at the end of an argument. This conversation needs to be natural and smooth. When it comes down to it, you can tell your partner about the benefits of sex toys, your desires and your hopes for making your sex life more exciting. You don’t want to demand anything – this is the best way for your introduction to backfire. The slower you go, and the more exultant you are of the benefits, the better things will go.

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Step 4Introduce the Biggest Toys First: Once you have the talk, it is time to whip out the big guns. You want to start with the big toys first because you want everything else that comes after it to be no big deal. Once that initial shock has subsided, you can start experimenting. This may seem like the opposite thing to do – especially if you are trying to ease your partner into it – but the truth of the matter is that it is better to shock first instead of shock later, because it may ruin the mood.

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Step 5Experiment: After you have whipped out your biggest toy and then introduced the rest of the little toys, you can then start experimenting. When it comes down to it, this will be the most fun part because you and your partner can really get a feel for different toys. For instance, cock rings – especially ones with a little vibrating bullet can feel great for both partners. When you first start experimenting, you want to be sure to go slow and you want to communicate. If one partner doesn’t like something, it has to be communicated right away.

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Step 6Have a Cool Down Discussion: Your last step is to have an overview discussion of your experiences. If you have always wanted to introduce sex toys into your sex life, you will probably want to do it again. If this is the case, discuss with your partner some of the things he or she liked or disliked. When it comes down to it, there are bound to be some notes. It is important to remember that the first impression will last the longest. So if you don’t take your time and remain thoughtful, your partner may not want to explore sex toys ever again, which won’t be good – sex toys can actually be a lot of fun.

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