The event-pocalypse is coming to San Francisco this weekend

420 at Hippie Hill Saturday, April 20, 9 a.m.-ish to dusk; peak is 4:20 p.m. Hippie Hill, Golden Gate Park, San Francisco Free FILE — 420 at Hippie Hill Saturday, April 20, 9 a.m.-ish to dusk; peak is 4:20 p.m. Hippie Hill, Golden Gate Park, San Francisco Free FILE — Photo: Jana Asenbrennerova / Special To The Chronicle Photo: Jana Asenbrennerova / Special To The Chronicle Image 1 of / 17 Caption Close The event-pocalypse is coming to San Francisco this weekend 1 / 17 Back to Gallery

Do you experience crippling indecision at the mere sight of a selection of choices? Are you both an Earth-lover and a stoner? Better buckle down and start planning: It's a beautiful weekend in San Francisco, and oh god, oh no, there are so many events this weekend.

Here's how you can celebrate 4/20, Earth Day, Easter, and everything in between:

420 at Hippie Hill

Saturday, April 20, 9 a.m.-ish to dusk; peak is 4:20 p.m.

Hippie Hill, Golden Gate Park, San Francisco

Free

Since the 1970s, it's been San Francisco tradition to gather on Hippie Hill to celebrate cannabis on April 20. This year, the city has actually permitted the event, even bringing in a sound system and DJs. While it is still technically illegal to smoke weed in public, on our sacred day of the Green Goddess, crackdowns are pretty rare.

Northern California Cherry Blossom Festival

Saturday & Sunday, April 20-21, 11 a.m. to 6 p.m. (parade Sunday at 1 p.m.)

Japantown, San Francisco

Free

If weed isn't really your speed, check out the second weekend of the Northern California Cherry Blossom Festival. Celebrate Japanese culture with food booths, cultural performances, martial arts, live bands, and a Grand Parade on Sunday to conclude the festival.

San Francisco International Beer Festival

Saturday, April 20, 7 p.m. to 10 p.m.

Fort Mason Center, Festival Pavilion, San Francisco

$75 general admission, $150 VIP Brewmaster

For a slightly hefty price tag, you can spend three hours tasting unlimited beer samples from 100+ brewers. Plus, try unlimited food samples from some of SF's best restaurants.

Free National Park Day

Saturday, April 20

Free

Alternatively, ditch the city entirely and head to Muir Woods, Yosemite, or Joshua Tree. To celebrate National Park Week 2019, every national park will be free this Saturday.

Earth Day Festival

Saturday, April 20, 11 a.m. to 7 p.m.

19th & 20th, Valencia St, San Francisco

Free

Celebrate the 49th year of Earth Day in the Mission District with live bands, DJs, environmental speakers, hands-on eco workshops, a sustainable fashion show, and an organic chef showcase.

World Naked Bike Ride: Earth Day Edition

Saturday, April 20, 11 a.m.

Ferry Building, San Francisco

Free

Get naked in protest of unsustainable energy policy around the world and join a bike ride starting at the Ferry Building and ending at the Earth Day Festival in the Mission. Just how naked is up to you.

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Ghirardelli Square Easter Festival

Saturday, April 20, noon to 4 p.m.

Ghirardelli Square, San Francisco

Free

Yes, Easter is this weekend, too. This one's for the kids — meet the Easter Bunny, participate in an egg roll, a digital hunt, and more.

28th Annual Union Street Easter Parade & Spring Festival

Sunday, April 21, 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. (parade at 2 p.m.)

Union Street, Gough to Fillmore, San Francisco

Free

If you're trying to go all-out for Easter, the Union Street festival will feature children's activities such as pony rides, the Easter Bunny, a petting zoo, and a Faerie Garden with arts and crafts. Plus, there's an Easter Bonnet Decorating Contest, and of course, the big parade at 2 p.m.

Easter in the Park & Hunky Jesus Contest

Sunday, April 21, noon to 4 p.m.

Mission Dolores Park, San Francisco

Don't miss San Francisco's favorite blasphemous Easter celebration: the Hunky Jesus Contest (half-naked men dressed as Jesus, if that wasn't clear). Plus, Easter activities and musical performances, organized by the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence.

Bring Your Own Big Wheel Race

Sunday, April 21, 3 p.m. to 6 p.m.

20th and Vermont, San Francisco

Free to watch, $10-20 donation suggested

Ah, San Francisco, how we love you and your ridiculous festivities. Top off the weekend with the Bring Your Own Big Wheel race, in which contestants attempt to navigate big wheels — those giant plastic tricycles from when we were kids — down the curviest street in SF.