A local Brunswick man is praying to whichever deity he holds dear this week that his beloved Melbourne Storm are granted mercy.

This comes after news broke this weekend that the team’s star fullback may be rubbed out of the big dance due to suspension.

34-year-old Axel Banwagen spoke to The Advocate this morning about facing the possibility that Christian Slater might not be able to play.

Despite that fact that the 49-year-old American actor and producer has never played a game of Rugby League in his life, the news that he may miss the Grand Final has crushed poor Banwagen.

“Honestly, if they stop Christian ‘The Kid’ Slater from playing in the premiership decider, Rugby League is dead!” Banwagen said to our reporters out the front of the hole in the wall coffee shop below his house.

“If they hand out a ban to Christian, I’m done with Rugby League, honestly I am”

“I’m not sure what else I’d support. AFL is too tribal down here. It’s animalistic. I detest such an aggressive brand of community spirit, it’s quite problematic..”

“And the A-League fans are flat out dangerous to be around”

Banwagen said that he saw the play in question, and it looked like the other player should be landing roles in Hollywood in time soon.

“Wow talk about being dramatic. Let Christian play!” he said.