1st Entry My name is Jim Moriarty the school counselor says that as part of my therapy I should write in a journal. The reason the school therapist is up in my face, is because I set Carl Power’s jacket on fire. He thinks he is so great. He makes me sick. Carl Powers and I are both 11 years old; we are in advanced placement classes together. Carl is one of the most popular kids in school; he is the best athlete in our district. Every day he makes my life a living hell. Yesterday, in chemistry he humiliated me in front of the entire class. Nobody wanted to be my lab partner, so the teacher had to work with me. I accidently spilled water on my crotch and Karl powers said that I had wet my pants. All the kids laughed at me all day. It was a tough afternoon, then at lunch Carl threw an apple at me and it hit me so hard that it left a red mark on the side of my face, and as if that wasn’t bad enough, I started to cry in front of the whole lunch crowd. It was after lunch that I saw Carl’s jacket and I set it on fire with some matches that I found behind the gym. I wish he would have been in it. As much as school sucks, home is even worse. My dad drinks all the time. He is a mean drunk. When he found out about the jacket, he beat me within an inch of my life. My mom just sits in the corner, smokes nonstop and reads romance novels. When my dad isn’t beating me, he is beating her. As much as I hate my dad, I hate my mom even more because she is such a coward and just sits there and takes it. Why she doesn’t stick a butcher knife in his back I’ll never know. I sometimes fantasize about stabbing him myself. God, it would feel so good to see the look of surprise on his face as I stuck a knife up to the hilt in his bloated belly. 2nd Entry Christmas is just around the corner, and I am feeling better. I actually have a friend at school. Her name is Ann, and she is so beautiful and sweet. She is tall has brown hair, blue eyes and she always smells like strawberries. We met at lunch. She was the new kid and didn’t know that she wasn’t supposed to sit next to me. Ann is one of those kids that make a person feel at ease. When she started talking to me I wouldn’t answer, then she laughed and asked me my name. I remember telling her that my name was Jim and that’s it. I talked nonstop as if making up for all the years of silence. Today was the day before winter break and she gave me a Christmas present. Can you believe it? It was just a small box of chocolates, but it meant the world to me. I have not gotten a Christmas present since my grandma died. She invited me to her house for Christmas Dinner, and I can hardly wait. Christmas may just be great this year. 3rd Entry On Christmas day I stole the neighbor kid’s bike to ride to Ann’s house. How can I describe Ann’s house? It was everything that my house could never be. My house is dark and dreary like the house in “The House of the Seven Gables”, and Ann’s house was full of light and laughter. I always thought those kinds of houses were just a fantasy on a Christmas T.V. show. Every square inch of Ann’s house was decorated with Angels. I had never seen so many beautiful things in one place. Food at my house is always pretty scarce and I usually just have a peanut butter and jelly sandwich for dinner. Ann’s Christmas dinner consisted of Ham, potatoes, green beans, hot biscuits and some kind of wonderful sweet relish. Dessert was some kind of fruit pie. If I would have known how things would turn out the way they have I would have never made friends with Ann. I went home in a daze. I felt as if nothing could douse my joy. For the first time I knew what the Christmas spirit was. I didn’t realize that I had left my jacket at Ann’s until after I got home. I put my key in the lock and was relieved when I say my dad passed out on the couch. My mom was nowhere to be seen, so she must have gone to bed. About a half hour later, there was a knock at the door. No one came to our house, unless it was a complaining neighbor, or someone wanting money. I peered through the peep hole in the door and saw Ann on the porch. Oh, God, I couldn’t let her in. I waited and didn’t answer the door, hoping that she would leave. The third time she knocked I heard my dad stir on the couch. I had to get her out of there before my dad woke up. I opened the door quietly and squeezed out onto the porch. Ann’s shinning smile was in such contrast to the monovalent atmosphere of our house that I almost cried. I thanked her for bringing me my coat and told her I couldn’t let her in because my dad was sick. Ann waved goodbye and that was it, she was gone and my chest actually hurt when she rode off on her bike. I jumped when I turned around and saw my dad standing behind me. He asked who Ann was and I told him she was just a school friend. My dad smiled and his eyes were hard and mean. It was too late to escape. He pulled me by the ear into the house and beat me worse than I had ever been beaten before. I went to my room and cried myself dry. It was then that I planned to kill him. 4th Entry I was still pretty sore a week later from the beating I got from my dad on Christmas. However, school was due to start in two days, so I was happy. One day when I came downstairs a man I had never seen before was talking softly with my dad. He gestured towards me and asked the man what he thought. I didn’t like the look on the man’s face, it was a look I had never seen before and it made me shiver. My dad grabbed me by the arm. Jim you need to go with this man, it’s time to earn your keep. Take him up to your room and do what he says. I tried to run, but the man was too fast. The man took me up to my room and locked the door. He grabbed me and gagged me. I just can’t write about what he did to me. I tried to think of Ann or anything else that was good, however, that was the day that darkness began to take me. My dad unlocked the door a few times and laughed at what was being done to me. The next time my Dad opened the door he told the man the half hour was up. The man begged for another half hour but my dad just laughed. Just give me my money and get out. 5th Entry When Ann tried to talk to me at school, I avoided her worried gaze and told her I wouldn’t be able to go to lunch with her anymore. So, at lunch I snuck back into the chemistry lab to experiment with concocting poisons. Botulinum was my poison of choice, but I had to get the formula just right. 6th Entry Several weeks have gone by and Ann has started hanging out with Carl Powers. Every time she approaches me I tell her that things are tough at home. I figure that pretty soon I would have the formula figured out, but I would need to test it out on a human. A few months later, I got my idea. The school was going to London for a swimming field trip. That’s the day I will test out my poison. I will kill Carl Powers. Carl had eczema, so I would sneak the poison in his tube of medicine. 7th Entry The worst thing happened today. Oh God I don’t know if I can write about it or not. I will try. Ann came by the house this afternoon. She got there just as one of the men had been in my room. I was sitting at the bottom of the steps with my head in my hands. She took one look at the glance the man gave me and well she just knew. Oh God, Jim, I’m going to get help she screamed and ran. The man began to chase her and before I knew it a car struck her down. I ran to her and as the ambulance was coming she died in my arms. Today it was if an angel of darkness took my soul. The feelings of hurt and loneliness that once overwhelmed me are gone and I feel invincible. 8th Entry Today was the field trip to the pool. It was so easy to slip the poison into Carl’s medicine. The teacher tried so hard to revive him that I really had to exercise all the self-control I could muster not to laugh as they took his body away. I am truly the master criminal. 9th Entry Several months later, I put my concoction in my dad’s gin bottle. I don’t even think my mom noticed he was gone. I know I’m not going to miss him a bit. So, let this be a lesson to all my future enemies I will burn the heart out of anyone who gets in my way. My heart is already burned out. I ceased to have a soul the day Ann died. code bookworm