An Albuquerque area woman says the face of Jesus Christ has appeared on her toe and healed its wounds. Paula Osuna was just minding her own business when she fell down the stairs and totally jacked her foot. When bandaging it up, she asked her fiancee to rub some holy dirt from El Santuario de Chimayó (a Catholic pilgrimage site in northern New Mexico) on said janky toe. The next thing she knew: BOOM. TOE JESUS.


Via KQRE/Christian Nightmares:

After putting the holy dirt on her foot and then bandaging it, she says the next day the bruise formed in the shape of Jesus on her second toe. Osuna says her family members first noticed the bruise. "My family has always done the pilgrimages to Chimayo and this is the first time I ever used it and I'm seeing something kind of come out full circle I guess." Osuna said. "She really did a lot of muscle ligament damage and she's back at work," Sikey Benavidez said. Osuna says the bruise has since changed shape, but she says she's convinced of the holy sighting.


I'm totally down with the idea that something appeared on Paula Osuna's toe, but I'm not sure it looks like Jesus. Let's look again.

Cast your vote for what the magic toe dirt actually looks like in the comments:

A. Jesus

B. SATAN

C. Jared Leto

D. Another smaller toe

But the real story here, I've discovered, is in the comments on that KQRE article, where the citizens of Silver City have taken it upon themselves to clear up A FEW MISCONCEPTIONS ABOUT PAULA AND SIKEY. I don't know if I should post them here because they are mega-libelous, but if you want a portrait of small-town intrigue and backbiting, please please please go read them. Here's just a sampling:

R U Kidding me? I too am from Silver City . Everything people are saying about Sikey is true. He needs to rub the dirt on himself.

I am a native from Silver City and work as the same place Sikey and half the town work at. I don't think Sikey has stepped inside a church or chapel his whole life. He is not an up and up man . On the contrary, I know his other fiance that he is also seeing or engaged too. This lady Paula needs help and maybe some good shoes !!

My name is Jesus... does that mean anything??? Heck no!!! Shoot I've seen white boys showing off a dog with a aperition on the dogs butt!!

The too of them would not know Jesus if it hit them in the eyeyballs.

Well then. Get well soon, Jesus Toe.