Chip Kelly has been making waves this NFL offseason. The Eagles have pretty much established at this point that they’re going to do whatever the F- they want. And, in this case, it appears highly likely that Chip Kelly wants Tim Tebow on his roster. Nope. You’re not high. Or, actually, you might be. But that’s still a report that’s been circulating.

We live in a digital age and No Coast Bias has some of the finest hackers this side of Edward Snowden. We’ve used those hackers to snatch up some of the text messages Eagles Coach Chip Kelly received last night once news of the impending Tebow to the Eagles signing broke. Here they are for your enjoyment.

Even some NFL Draft Prospects Wanted to Capitalize on the Tebow Name for their Own Personal Gain

Upon Hearing that Chip was Handing Out Second Chances, Even Convicts Got in on the Action

The Man Who Most Experts Predict Will Be Philly’s Week-One Starter Wanted to Check in with His Head Coach

Even the Man of the Hour (long Sportscenter special that will inevitably air this morning) Wanted to Thank Chip Personally

One of Chip’s Two USC QB’s shot off a quick message to the coach.

Everyone’s Favorite Accidental Racist Accidentally Text His Coach During the Melee

And Even Chip’s Personal Friend Dave Chappelle Took Time out from Pre-Gaming for 4/20 to Fire Off a Cautionary Message