For this post, I want to highlight a brilliant video I saw during last week. This video relates to an increasingly frequent topic – the phenomenon of everyday nudity.



This video was posted in August 2016 by American youtuber “lengthyounarther”, and is entitled “The Curious Decline of Communal Showers”. The poster is “gay” identified, a fact that he acknowledges very early in his video. He thinks it makes him biased, when in reality, he’s no more biased than most other men.

The poster grew up during the decline of mass communal showering. In his youth, he knew the ubiquity of mass communal showering, though he didn’t personally experience it until his teens, when he went to Boy Scout camp. In his adulthood, he experienced the current taboo of everyday nudity among the young, and what effects it’s having on them. Because he has seen both worlds, his viewpoint makes him a valuable and authoritative source on this issue.

Before I go further, I must stress that I’m making no comment on the rest of his videos. I neither endorse them nor condemn them. I’m limiting my commentary to this one excellent video.

Below is the video in question. Please watch it in full. The whole video runs 31 minutes, but I guarantee that it will be worth every second. The poster put up an intelligent, perceptive and provocative commentary that should be viewed by everyone.

These are some main points I wish to highlight:

He notes an age difference about who gets naked in the locker room. As this blog noted in the past, older men are much less inhibited about getting naked. This is because, owing to past attitudes, these men had no qualms about getting naked when they were younger.

As this blog noted in the past, older men are much less inhibited about getting naked. This is because, owing to past attitudes, these men had no qualms about getting naked when they were younger. He notes that some microcultures in the U.S. still practice communal nudity. However, they are usually environments hidden from the general public – the military, certain gyms, sports, private schools, etc.

However, they are usually environments hidden from the general public – the military, certain gyms, sports, private schools, etc. He notes that both “gay” and “straight” people are equally terrified of everyday nudity. In fact, according to him, “gay” people are actually far more scared of this practice. Interestingly, for both groups, their apprehension is caused by the central tenet of modern sexual philosophy – that same-sex eroticism is inherently abnormal and aberrant. “Straights” are afraid of it because the practice is too “gay”. “Gays” are afraid of it because it might expose their sexuality, which they feel insecure about. Doesn’t this show that nobody wins in the “Straight”-”Gay” dichotomy?

In fact, according to him, “gay” people are actually far more scared of this practice. Interestingly, for both groups, their apprehension is caused by the central tenet of modern sexual philosophy – that same-sex eroticism is inherently abnormal and aberrant. “Straights” are afraid of it because the practice is too “gay”. “Gays” are afraid of it because it might expose their sexuality, which they feel insecure about. Doesn’t this show that nobody wins in the “Straight”-”Gay” dichotomy? He notes that communal showering contains a social element that is highly appealing. It encourages closeness among males that can be relaxing and refreshing. He says further that it’s good for body image, saying it’s hard to be “jealous when you’re just out in the open seeing everybody else.” It also establishes an egalitarianism that’s hard to see elsewhere in society.

It encourages closeness among males that can be relaxing and refreshing. He says further that it’s good for body image, saying it’s hard to be “jealous when you’re just out in the open seeing everybody else.” It also establishes an egalitarianism that’s hard to see elsewhere in society. He realized that his fear of communal showering was much ado about nothing. In Boy Scouts camp, his “straight” friends pressured him to join them in the communal showers. Once he got a taste, he couldn’t get enough. Communal showering immediately became an enjoyable experience to eagerly anticipate. While at camp, he went from being in communal showers once a week to being there once a day. When it came to communal showering, the only thing to fear was fear itself.

In Boy Scouts camp, his “straight” friends pressured him to join them in the communal showers. Once he got a taste, he couldn’t get enough. Communal showering immediately became an enjoyable experience to eagerly anticipate. While at camp, he went from being in communal showers once a week to being there once a day. When it came to communal showering, the only thing to fear was fear itself. He notes that the United States is unique in its prudishness about communal nudity. When he visited Iceland, he noticed that no one there had qualms about same-sex nudity, whether they were natives or visitors. Old and young freely got naked. The only ones who raised a fuss were, in most cases, tourists from the U.S.

There is one aspect I must disagree with him on. One argument he makes is that communal showering usually isn’t homoerotic, so there’s no reason to fear it. To me, there is definitely homoeroticism infused into communal showering, and inside everyday nudity in general. It’s just a different kind of homoeroticism that the “gay” world cannot comprehend.

Homoeroticism in the “gay” world is usually predatory in nature. It honors headhunting and objectification, where people are used as mere vessels for pleasure. It focuses on getting as much sex as possible, inside the shortest duration of time. Relationships are a secondary concern. As a result, “gay” homoeroticism encourages interaction that is adversarial, where one seeks to dominate another for their satisfaction. It’s focused on stating its intentions quickly, “getting down to business” immediately, and finishing just as fast. After the deed is done, its participants need not care about each other.

Homoeroticism outside the “gay” world is different. It’s much more playful and casual. It doesn’t rush things if it doesn’t feel natural. It’s focused on building intimacy through camaraderie and shared experience. In this non-”gay” homoeroticism, relationships are the central focus, where people are important above all. Sex often happens in the context of friendship, as a conduit to achieve ultimate closeness. As a result, sex is often egalitarian in nature, where its participants wish to connect with one another, and not dominate each other.

Since this homoeroticism is focused on building friendships, it doesn’t announce sexual interest right away. Sex is not an automatic or guaranteed outcome of these relationships. Instead, chances for sexual interaction depends on its partners, and the level of intimacy between them. In this mode of homoeroticism, interest is usually expressed through subtle actions and expressions. These actions often involve or lead to touching – playfighting, jesting, pranking, lighthearted verbal sparring, wrestling, etc. At other times, the friends might invent situations where they see each other undressed – changing in the locker room together, hanging out with each other in their underwear, going swimming (perhaps naked) etc.

If the participants are willing, and beyond a certain level of trust, the activity will slowly but surely escalate into more blatantly erotic behavior. As time goes by, levels of trust and intimacy make sexual interaction more likely. The friends might feel free to take off more clothing around each other. They might also touch each other for longer periods of time, and increasingly vary the areas they touch. Once they are intimate enough to touch each other’s genitals without complaint, all bets are off.

Plus, keep in mind that there’s no set timeline for this progression. All this can happen in a few minutes, a few hours, a few days, a few weeks, a few months, or even a few years. It entirely depends on the people involved. In all cases, levels of trust and intimacy dictate whether sex will happen, and when it will happen..

I’ve basically described the approach explained by the g0y movement and the Man2Man Alliance (both links NSFW) – where increasing intimacy leads to sex, and eroticism happens in the context of relationships. It’s worth noting that in these relationships, anal sex usually isn’t the outcome, at least not historically. That would not be considered sex with equality.

The “gay” world has difficulty understanding homoeroticism outside its own sphere. For that audience, non-”gay” homoeroticism is far too subtle to be authentic. If imminent sex isn’t the goal, it’s not real. The lack of anal sex would also be a big turn-off.

To me, this is because the “gay” leadership cannot acknowledge that non-”gay” homoeroticism is also legitimate. That would require admitting that same-sex eroticism isn’t the sole domain of “gays”. By extension, that would undermine their claim to authority on all same-sex issues.

The point is, because of his ”gay” identity, this reality might have affected the poster’s powers of observation. He claims that homoeroticism is barely visible in communal showering, and that the setting is too mundane for it to exist. For him, it only becomes homoerotic if its participants start making out or more, and “that almost never happens”. He doesn’t realize that those action are merely manifestations of an already erotic atmosphere. He doesn’t understand that, while they’re infused with a different kind of eroticism, communal showers are actually very homoerotic environments.

Through their actions, his “straight” friends in Boy Scout camp made that obvious. He explains that his first experience with communal showering happened with them, and because of them. They applied so much peer pressure to have him join them in the showers, he eventually relented.

He guessed they merely wanted to socialize with him in a relaxed environment. However, that can happen in settings that don’t involve full nudity, such as during board games or sports. There was likely another reason why they took him to the showers: they probably found him attractive, and they really wanted to see how he looked naked. That flew over his head because it wasn’t explicitly sexual. He didn’t realize that, in non-”gay” homoeroticism, erotic attraction and social interaction often go hand in hand.

I can speak from personal experience, because I emerged from one of the microcultures mentioned by the poster. This male writer spent his primary school years inside a private school, where communal nudity was frequent and regular. After swimming, we always changed naked with each other, freely talking and observing each other while doing so. There was no rule enforcing total nudity in our locker room. However, nobody in the staff ever stopped us, and none of us wanted to end it. To put it bluntly, we wanted to get naked with each other, and we loved it too much to stop.

This experience of communal nudity created a social environment that was refreshing, relaxing, and titillating. As a result, us boys were bonded together like glue. We had a deep emotional connection to each other, and had few qualms about physical contact. We felt quite normal in being deeply bonded, and never felt that our intimacy deserved to be labelled as an abnormality. It also didn’t stop us from expressing interest in the girls at our school.

Given the experiences of myself and the poster, it becomes clear why everyday nudity (including communal showering) has become so taboo in the United States. These practices create environments that disprove the central tenet of modern sexual philosophy. They show that same-sex eroticism isn’t abnormal or aberrant, in a way that is forceful and unignorable.

The rules of modern sexual philosophy (including the “Straight”-”Gay” dichotomy) only make sense if you believe that central tenet is true. If you stop believing that same-sex eroticism is abnormal and aberrant, the rest of modern sexual philosophy falls like a house of cards.

Thus, even though the poster missed the abovementioned point, that doesn’t cancel out the rest of his video essay. Instead, the video shows him doing something forbidden: he is critically thinking about modern sexual philosophy, and is publicly asking if its rules make sense.

As such, his questioning was likely spurred by his experience with communal nudity. From my viewpoint, those memories forcefully loosened the grip of modern sexual philosophy on his mind. Remember the contradictions he observed in his experiences:

His “straight” friends were the ones who dragged him into the communal showers, when they should have been the last to do so

Instead of being a dreadful event, communal nudity created an environment that was relaxing and refreshing, and something to look forward to

His body image improved through communal nudity, and not through covering up

Paradoxically, “gays” are more afraid of communal nudity than “straights” are

I can’t see how these inconsistencies wouldn’t make him wonder. As a result, while modern sexual philosophy still exerts some power in him, it has visibly lost its stranglehold.

To me, experience with communal nudity is one of the easiest ways to disprove modern sexual philosophy. It’s one that you can personally experience, and with relatively minimal effort. So, this is my challenge to you, my readers.

My Challenge To The Readers

In your local school, college, gym, pool, or elsewhere, you’ll likely find showers in them.

Hopefully there are accessible and are functioning.

If you’re lucky, those showers might be communal showers, though those kinds are slowly disappearing.

If you don’t use those showers, start using them. If you are using them, stop wearing clothing in them. Freely shower naked inside them. If your shower room has stalls separated by curtains, leave the curtain half drawn, or don’t close it at all. Walk to your locker with the towel around your neck, and not around your waist. If you have to change clothes in the locker room, skip the “towel dance” and change naked. Better yet, carry on your conversations while you’re naked, and don’t give it a second thought.



After all, there’s no law anywhere in the world that bans nudity in the locker room. It would be too absurd to propose, and too tricky to enforce. The taboo on everyday nudity is instead enforced through social norms.

If others ask why the change in behavior, just say that it’s more practical this way, it feels freer this way, etc. Or, if you like, just don’t explain it. Just force them to accept it, because it’s not abnormal.

In this paragraph, I want to address the males specifically. Usually, guys avoid communal nudity because they’re afraid they’ll have an erection in those situations, which will embarrass them. First of all, there’s nothing embarrassing about having properly functioning anatomy. You’re a guy, so erections will happen. If you get an erection – and believe me, you will – don’t make a fuss about it. If it’s because a guy nearby turns you on, that’s still nothing to worry about. Just carry on with whatever you’re doing. In fact, turn the erection into a lighthearted joke. It’s only humiliating if you think it is.

Case in point: take a look at this video recorded in China (link NSFW), where communal nudity is still common. This video shows a swimming team or class changing into their street clothes. As you watch the video, you’ll notice that at least one guy has a full erection, and two others become semi erect. Yet, from what can be seen, their erections don’t cause a fuss. Are they having erections because of their fellow classmates? Possibly yes, but it still doesn’t cause them an issue. If that’s the case for them, why can’t it be for you?

Of course, some blowback is inevitable. Some will try making your conduct an issue, loudly claiming that it’s indecent or “gay”. To counter that, you must possess the self-confidence to know that you’re doing nothing wrong. There’s nothing indecent about being naked, especially in situations that require it. There’s certainly nothing “gay” about it, given the contradictory meaning the word has. You simply have the confidence and self esteem to openly expose your body, which your accusers badly lack. Being inwardly convinced of that will make it easier to deal with outside critics.

Sooner or later, some of your friends will probably join you in being naked. Some of them might be those who previously criticized you. As time goes by, those who go naked might steadily increase in number. If that seems puzzling, realize that this topic is on a lot of people’s minds, including your friends. They might inwardly wish to go naked as they please, but lack the confidence to do it. In these situations, it often takes just one person to make a difference, to bravely do what others cannot. Once those people see others that act as they see fit, and disregard those who berate them, they’ll band around them and follow whatever they do.

Even if that doesn’t happen, which is very unlikely, at least you’ll be pleasing yourself.

More likely than not, you’ll begin noticing amazing things. Your self-confidence will increase by leaps and bounds. Your body image will also improve greatly. You’ll take more pride in your appearance, and if you want to improve it, you’ll do it from a healthier standpoint. You’ll begin appreciating your body for the unique creation it is, and you’ll better respect the different body types that surround you. You better understand the oneness that unites mankind, by seeing that underneath all the clothing, we’re all the same.

In all likelihood, benefits won’t merely be internal. Your bonds with your same-sex friends will become deeper. They’ll become less uptight about being close to you, or you being close to them. Your same-sex friendships will become more intimate than ever, and the suggestion that it’s “weird” or “gay” will steadily become more ridiculous. You’ll personally experience what this blog has been saying – that everyday nudity creates environments that bring same-sex bonding into overdrive.

Of course, the increase of communal nudity will also bring up other issues. The events depicted in this video (link NSFW) become more likely to happen. In case you didn’t click on the link, the video depicts two Chinese boys playing around in a school shower, sucking each other off and mutually masturbating each other. In other words, as more and more choose to get naked, the chances of homoerotic interaction also rise. In such a scenario, your peers will ask themselves how their desires and behavior can’t be “gay”.

In that case, the content of this blog and other websites will prove extremely valuable. The experience of communal nudity might make your peers more receptive to your message. Use the content and referenced websites liberally. Be proactive in educating your peers. You will have to show that there’s nothing wrong with them. Show them that, as the Man2Man Alliance says (link NSFW), same-sex activity is simply an activity, and not a condition. Tell them that their desires and behavior are natural and normal, don’t require assuming a “gay” identity, and need not involve anal play or drag.

In this way, you will help loosen the grip of modern sexual philosophy on their friends and colleagues. In your local community, it will have to fight a battle it cannot honestly win.

On the page “For Straight People (though not exclusively)”, I ended the page with this quote from Chinese philosopher Lao Tzu: “The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step”. Let this be your first step. I guarantee that, just by choosing to shower naked in front of same-sex peers, you will never be the same again.

Post Scriptum

It’s worth mentioning that modern gym design helps sustain the modern taboo on everyday nudity.

Note this excerpt from the Man2Man Alliance, from a page entitled “From Longhouse to Hidey-Hole”, in which founder Bill Weintraub says the following:

The first time I encountered shower stalls in what should have been a communal space was in a fairly up-scale gym in 2001.

This gym had male and female members, and I suspect the shower stalls had been installed on both sides of the locker rooms just as a matter of course.

But there were two huge problems with those stalls.

First off, they were clearly less hygienic than a large open space.

They were relatively small, and had lots of nooks and crannies that would have to be thoroughly cleaned daily to prevent mold and bacteria from taking hold.

In addition, those stalls induced paranoia.

Because you were given the distinct sense that it was wrong for a man to see another man naked.

So when you were in the stall, you saw that guys tried very hard to avoid looking at the guys in the neighboring stalls.

Which was difficult and not at all necessary.

Who cares after all if one man sees another naked?

Ironically, the only place I felt you could relax in there and just be a man was in front of the row of sinks where guys shaved and combed their hair etc.

Those sinks were communal – so you could stand in front of the sink drying your hair with your towel off and it wasn’t a big deal.

But clearly it matters how we structure these public spaces.

Communal showers and open dressing rooms encourage guys to relax and just be guys.

Since it’s impossible not to see a guy’s dick in that situation, it’s easier just to relax and not worry about it.

If everyone’s naked – then clearly it’s okay.

Stalls, like I said, make people paranoid.

Now the guys have to worry about Will I be accused of looking at another man’s equipment?

Which is actually a completely natural male activity.

But you see the problem.

Remember the main point: the structure of public space affects what happens inside them. In this case, new shower designs reinforce the idea that men seeing each other naked is wrong.

However, even in this case, the new designs can’t reach their full effect without your support.

This is why I suggested leaving the curtains open on shower stalls. Curtains and doors are only useful if they’re closed, to impose a firm division of space. If they aren’t being used, those dividers (and the separations they create) are virtually nonexistent. If no one uses curtains, groups of shower stalls quickly transform into another kind of communal shower room.

I saw this in action during Summer 2017, when I visited a local indoor pool. The pool showers were designed to be individual stalls separated by curtains, basically like this. At the time I visited, the curtains had accumulated a lot of mildew, so they were all taken down. However, pool patrons (which were mostly immigrants and immigrant youth) still mostly showered nude.

Through this combination of factors, a noisy communal shower room came into existence. Conversation freely flowed back and forth between shower heads. Nude bathers felt free to go to other shower stalls, to speak with friends or help patrons with malfunctioning showers. Everybody saw each other in the full monty, and few felt any apprehension about it.

All that ended when the new curtains came in. Conversations across showers stopped. Free flow of traffic among stalls virtually ceased. Younger patrons now felt compelled to draw the curtains, and separate themselves from everyone else. By the addition of one item, the communal shower room turned back into individual stalls.

Make no mistake: your decision to draw the curtain has powerful effects on the shower room’s overall atmosphere. An open curtain can be inviting and welcoming, while a closed curtain can be dispelling and repellant. Even if walls separate showers, only curtains and doors can make their transformation into stalls complete.

Thus, by not using curtains, you might subvert their intended effect. Even if those showers have walls, people will still feel free to circulate amongst them. Without a visible barrier, people will feel free to have conversations between showers. In such a free flowing atmosphere, a patron might freely share their shower with one or two others. In these ways, the intent of these new designs – to generate unnecessary fear in their users – will be completely defeated.

While many writers might complain about our culture’s increasing prudishness, few think that resistance is practical. They might feel that our present attitudes will block communal nudity from happening again. Man2Man Alliance founder Bill Weintraub might summarize their thoughts well, in another excerpt from “Longhouse”:

What father is going to stand up at a meeting of the school board and demand communal showers for his son?

He’ll be accused of being a pervert – and his son too.

In the prevalence of this prudishness, he acknowledges that “gay” culture had a hand in creating it:

Now: [Alliance member] Redd asked, “Has promiscuity among gay men who stalk gyms forced nudity into the closet of shower stalls and wrap around towels?”

In my view, yes, because that very aggressive gay male promiscuity, which objectifies its lust-ojects [sic], poisons the well for all Men.

As Redd said: “Promiscuity objectifies the body which is disrespectful. Its admiration is lust.”

When straight-identified men began joining the Alliance, some of the gay men in here at the time started to become very predatory towards them.

And that’s a typical and very common gay male / analist attitude – that all men can be “had,” but the biggest “prize” is a straight guy.

Needless to say, men do not want to be hunted.

So basically I had to toss some of the gay guys out.

In other words, while most “gay” men might be terrified of communal nudity, there are a few who have made communal showers their stalking grounds, which makes life miserable for everyone. Yet, I don’t think even this should be a reason to not go nude. Rather than being feared, these men should be confronted, so that they don’t encumber the freedom of others.

To me, and along with Bill Weintraub, I think resistance is practical and necessary. I’ve seen what’s possible when, in small environments, communal nudity comes acceptable. If we are imaginative and daring, there’s no reason why everyday nudity can’t become common again.

Of course, it requires insisting that such a demand is not a perverted request, and saying that our present concepts of sexuality are wrong. It would also require combating forces that would abuse these arrangements, and pressing forward despite the threat they pose. If we have the strength to do that, I confidently believe nothing will stop us.

~~~

This is part 3 of a series on everyday communal nudity. Feel free to read other parts of this series.