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Ouch! Sex toy related injuries have surged since the release of Fifty Shades of Grey – 50 Shades Of Grey Injury Explosion!

he NHS and London Fire Brigade are bracing themselves for a slew of sex related injuries. Because Fifty Shades of Grey hits our cinemas – and our bedrooms – this weekend.

The London Fire Brigade (LFB) said today it was ‘concerned’ the film’s release could lead to a ‘spike’ in people being stuck or trapped in handcuffs or bindings.

Since April, it has attended 393 such incidents.

Meanwhile, sex toy injuries have doubled overall since 2007. And, according to recent figures, they saw a spike in 2012 and 2013 following the release of the Fifty Shades mummy porn trilogy.

These concerning stats, reported by the Washington Post, come courtesy of the National Electronic Injury Surveillance System, which has tracked casualty admissions since 1991.

Injuries relating to ‘massage devices and vibrators’ rocketed in 2012, when 2,500 people checked in at the ER. The first Fifty Shades of Grey book was released in 2011. There is no proof the two are linked, but, well, it’s safe to assume they could be.

Thankfully, most injuries incurred were not too severe.

71 per cent of patients were treated and released, with only 25 per cent requiring hospitalization. And the good news was that none of the cases required assistance from the fire department, and zero deaths were recorded.

Phew.

However, with reports that sex shops on both sides of the Atlantic are already stocking up on their sex toys ahead of the film’s release this weekend – while B&Q is warning staff to expect a run on DIY S&M items – there could be trouble ahead for an already stretched NHS.

Stay safe out there folks.

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