Taylor Schilling, Orange Is the New Black

If you're anything like us, you've probably already watched the entire third season of Orange Is the New Black (twice). And that's OK, because in addition to being one of the funniest shows on television, Orange is also a major life education on everything from who to trust (answer: no bitch) to the best summer reading (The Time Hump Chronicles).

Check out the 23 biggest, life-changing lessons we learned from Orange Is the New Black Season 3 below.

1. Friday Night Lights holds the answer to every question.

Photo: Netflix

2. Even books deserve a funeral.

Photo: Netflix

Photo: Netflix

3. When your cult gets out of hand, just eat your feelings.

Photo: Netflix

4. America needs to get its priorities straight.

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5. Sometimes it's best to be direct.

Photo: Netflix

Photo: Netflix

Photo: Netflix

6. Softening your eyeliner is the real key.

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7. You are what you eat.

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8. Not everyone can be Shakespeare, but that's OK.

Photo: Netflix

Photo: Netflix

Photo: Netflix

9. Don't be ashamed of your body.

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10. It's possible to love corn more than people.

Photo: Netflix

11. Don't let anyone question your artistic voice.

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Photo: Netflix

12. Hate sex doesn't work so well once the hate is gone.

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13. Never let others define you.

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14. Make sure to keep a busy schedule.

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Photo: Netflix

15. Roll with the punches.

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Photo: Netflix Photo: Netflix

16. Everyone wants to be Jewish.

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17. Switch up your excuses.

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18. People change.

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19. There's always time for a swim.

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Photo: Netflix Photo: Netflix

20. Desperate people will believe anything.

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21. Always follow the Queen's lead.

Photo: Netflix

Photo: Netflix

22. It's OK not to write your own vows.

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Photo: Netflix Photo: Netflix

23. And of course, trust no bitch.

Photo: Netflix