If you are reading this, consider yourself lucky. For I am a woman, and I know all. I’m an oracle of the primordial wisdom of womanhood — a goddess of too-often-suppressed insight. Everything I do and say is perfect. My powers are all-encompassing.

According to Democrats and their media allies, that is.

Judging by their pro-female effusions, women are so much better than men in every respect and every one of life’s ­dimensions that any power granted us could never be squandered or misused. It could only redound to the benefit of humankind. Parenthetical: That is, so long as the women in question are reliable left-wingers.

Gibbering ahead of the ­Nevada Democratic debate last week, former Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid declared that “every time we’ve gotten a woman in the Senate, the Senate has gotten ­better.”

Every time. That’s amazing. Women are so magical that our very presence in the US Senate made that august body better. But better how or at what or in what way? Reid left that unclear.

Oddly, the same Reid fought hard to stop Sen. Joni Ernst (R-Iowa) from making the Senate better with her election bid in 2014. While she was campaigning, Reid mocked her for supposedly spending “the entire campaign talking about what she did as a young girl.”

But such awkward exceptions (Republican women) aside, women are a gift to politics. It doesn’t matter what we believe or do, just the presence of our gender makes the birds chirp and the trains run on time. We are just that good.

“I have an idea,” Amy Klobuchar said during the Dem ­debate, and the whole room leaned forward, because all ideas from women are always amazing. “I have an idea of how we can stop sexism on the ­Internet. We could nominate a woman candidate for president of the United States.”

Is there anything women can’t do? We make the Senate better, and if Democrats nominate one to be president — poof! No more sexism on the Internet. It’s so easy. Why didn’t anyone think of this earlier? Oppose Klobuchar or Elizabeth Warren, the other woman in the race, over their left-wing platforms? Sounds like you want sexism on the Internet.

Warren has her own ideas on what she can ­accomplish specifically because she’s a woman. Calling the Trump White House “a mess,” Warren then added: “And when you’ve got a mess, and you really need it cleaned up, call a woman to get the job done.” Thankfully Klobuchar isn’t president yet, or Warren might get in trouble for the sexist insinuation that women are the right people for cleaning up messes.

In this telling, the only other posture for women, if we aren’t superhero heavenly beings sent to fix everything with our mere presence, is to be put upon and in a state of desperation.

To hear the same Democrats tell it, it’s incredibly hard to be a woman, especially in America. Two weeks ago, Rep. Ayanna Pressley said: “The year is 2020, and here we women are still in so many ways not fully free, still shackled.”

Pressley explained: “This country’s laws have historically treated us like second-class citizens, ­depriving us of the right to vote, enter most jobs and to own property.” She acknowledged that “some of these injustices may cease to exist,” but then added that “we still face tremendous barriers to our full participation in society.”

Except, of course, women do fully participate in society. We do have the right to vote. We can enter most jobs, and we can own property. We are fully free, and we are in no way shackled. In a free country where women are in control of our own individual destinies, comments like Pressley’s are downright offensive. There are women in many parts of the world who don’t have the abundant freedom that American women enjoy. To paint us free women as “shackled,” when Saudi Arabian women just barely won the right to drive cars, is outrageously disingenuous.

Neither of the left’s visions of women — blessed unicorns or accursed victims — treats them like real people. Equality means treating women the same as men—that is, as fallen human beings, capable of great acts of virtue as well as great evil. We will make mistakes and, yes, messes. Our presence doesn’t automatically make anything better. We’re individuals, not a monolith. It would be nice if the Democrats noticed.

Twitter: @Karol