Here at Heddels, we work very hard to bring you the best of what the worlds of raw denim and heritage clothing have to offer. But in order to do that, we have to wade through a lot of crap.

Most of it is just boring, the same old rehashed Americana stuff that’s neither bad nor good and not really worth commenting on. Some of them attain other levels of glory. That gave us an idea for a new series that instead of focussing on the diamonds in the rough, took a closer look at the turds in the rough, the ones that make the rough look good. Welcome to the Worst of Raw Denim.

Lawless Denim No Hardware Jeans

Arizona’s Lawless Denim has developed a new system to fasten your pants that’s infinitely faster than buttons or zippers–nothing!!

This innovative new system is apparently only available to Reddit’s r/rawdenim user V4cantMind, who bought a pair and when they finally came after several patient months, had no hardware. But hey, this might make it easier to get through security at the airport!

Make Your Own Jeans Raw Denim

Do you have an affinity for chaos emeralds? Are all of your life’s plans ruined by a speedy blue hedgehog? Do you have a body shape that’s somewhat…egg-like? If so, Make Your Own Jeans appears to have a cut designed with you in mind.

Jailhouse Denim Phone Pocket Jeans

The big concept behind Jailhouse Denim’s new jeans new Kickstarter campaign is innovation. And the first twenty seconds of their funding video is half truck ad, half tech startup pitch and likens their drive to Steve Jobs and Henry Ford. With this kind of build up, what could they be doing to a pair of jeans? A new stronger material? A new cut that revolutionizes how they shape to the body?? Did they also remove buttons and rivets???

No, they put a little stretchy pocket on the front for your phone.

Evisu Multipocket Jeans

Someone at Evisu must have mis-read “five pocket” for “fifteen pocket jean” when these jeans went to the production line. That’s the only logical explanation to how this pair of pants was created because it honestly looks like the denim equivalent of an STD.

Needles Rebuild Motocross Pant

Have you ever been so disappointed in your fades that you wished you could just sew new denim onto your jeans and start over? I don’t think that was the motivation behind this pair of Needles rebuild jeans, but it is certainly the effect. In our interview with William Gibson, said of Needles “I don’t think they have any grasp of source code at all.”

Have you witnessed any jeans crimes in the wild? Send them to us at info@heddels.com