The Skills System is a user-friendly set of emotion regulation skills, designed to help people of various ages and abilities, manage emotions. Learning how to regulate emotions enables us to be present in the moment and be more effective–even in stressful situations. Over- and under-reacting can cause more stress and problems. The Skills System helps us be aware of our current moment, think through the situation, and take goal-directed actions that align with our values.

A key benefit of the Skills System is that it helps us co-regulate—allowing us to work collaboratively with other people to manage emotions. When we, and the people around us, know the Skills System, we share a common language. We are able to connect. We are able to give and receive effective skills coaching. These types of interactions often lead to growth and development for ourselves and the people around us.

Unfortunately in many settings, co-regulation happens less often than co-dysregulation—when we find ourselves working against each other, rather than together, to manage emotions. Connections become strained, potentially leading to higher stress levels and environmental conflict.

Thankfully, the Skills System provides an integrated skill-set that makes us better able to self-regulate and co-regulate.