Whoever chewed that umbrella handle watching the Demon Spofforth in 1882 was an amateur.

Where were you when Jason Roy reviewed that lbw? What about when Joe Root swished at his second consecutive ball? Did you doubt Jos Buttler, figuring he had reached his zenith against Pakistan, suspect Ben Stokes was due a failure? What about when Trent Boult’s heel touched the boundary markers? When England needed 15 off the last over – still doubting? What about after the six? The overthrow? Did you hear that Jofra Archer had never conceded 16 in a one-day international over? Did you laugh? Was doubt your friend until the very end? Congratulations you are a true-(baby)-blue England supporter. You are also a World Cup winner!

England win Cricket World Cup after super-over drama against New Zealand Read more

It was an apt conclusion to England’s men’s World Cup story, from Stokes to Ian Blackwell. A story conjured up by some twisted sadist laughing hysterically in a mirror-lined attic, first lining up hope then scattering it with despair before lacing it with farce. If you were a 10-year-old for that first men’s World Cup in 1975, watching with a scorecard in one hand and a Tizer in another, you will be 54 now. In the intervening period five teams have lifted the trophy, with one of them winning five times – you know which. Another side had made the final three times but never won – until now. Oh yes.

How we have suffered with them over the years, growing steadily saggier and more broken as they stumbled from competition to competition, morphing from comb-overs to highlighted dilettantes with beery bellies, from tortured souls to today’s designer-bearded super athletes.

In truth the World Cup became a kind of sitting jinx. Something best approached with existential despair and abandoned, shortly afterwards, in the same way. England would enter the tournament with natural optimism, sometimes on the back of a long tour, sometimes (Ian Botham) on the back of a panto run, with a team picked from musing on an envelope – all the while waiting to see what strange and brilliant inventions the rest of the world had been working on.

The Spin: sign up and get our weekly cricket email.

For the first few tournaments, fans could be forgiven some optimism; England were runners-up three times in the first five. But then bathos set in, in three of the next six, they fell out in the opening round.

In 1975, in whites and over 60 overs, England managed three huge victories before being speared by Gary Gilmour in the semi-final. Four years later they got to the final and, after watching Viv Richards explode a century, Geoff Boycott and Mike Brearley carefully fashioned 129 in 38 overs.

In 1983 they were pipped at the post in the semi-final again, this time by India on a slow boil. Then the World Cup went walkabout. In 1987 a promising final run chase crashed when Mike Gatting took that fateful fancy to Allan Border. In 1992, another final, against Pakistan. Derek Pringle still remembers two lbw shouts against Javed Miandad being turned down: “Allah smile on me today,” he told Pringle in the dressing-room afterwards, patting his leg.

England win a World Cup … and for once the nation really was watching | Barney Ronay Read more

By 1996 a Sanath Jayasuriya-inspired Sri Lanka were easing past a plodding England in the quarter-finals. In 1999, the last time the World Cup was held in this country, a risible set of events starting with soggy fireworks at Lord’s finished with an early exit at Edgbaston. Fan ennui set in.

The 2000s can be summed up in a single world. Misery. All culminating in the nadir of 2015; England endured a World Cup where everything they touched turned to soup. But from that, the metamorphosis, inspired by fearless, sportsmanlike New Zealand, this tournament’s awesome runners-up.

Eoin Morgan and coach Trevor Bayliss brought together a likeable, brilliant band of brothers and force-fed them confidence. For four years they notched up victory after victory until, like robins learning to trust the slippered lady scattering breadcrumbs, we too began to believe. So when, at the height of their powers, they stumbled last month against Pakistan and Sri Lanka, we trusted them.

Hah! I don’t think so. We laid down the coverlet in the darkened room.

“Sunday is not a day to shy away from,” Morgan said on Thursday. “It’s a day to look forward to.” How we scoffed. How wrong we were. Ye god Eoin! Thank you.