>be white cis male

>wake up and check my privilege

>go to make coffee

>check my privilege

>realize coffee beans are picked by slaves

>throw away coffee, apologize to Colombian children

>consider taking shower, but first check my privilege

>running water, soap, shower curtain

>LifeOnEasyMode.jpg

>weep, apologize

>get dressed for work, put on pants, avoiding hetero-normative necktie

>check my privilege

>pants were invented by Iranians in the 6th Century

>cultural appropriation

>apologize to Iranians

>open car door, realize it reeks of privilege

>consider taking bike instead

>check privilege

>bikes are ableism

>apologize to handi-capable people

>take public bus while checking my privilege

>full of people of color

>apologize for slavery and being racist

>they say it’s okay

>internalized racism

>weep

>get to work, boss asks why I’m late, crying and pants-less

>apologize for contributing to the patriarchy

>wat.jpg

>apologize for wanting to rape her

>wat.jpg

>unable to control cis-male rape instinct

>rape boss while checking my privilege

>apologize

>arrested, charged, get ten years in prison

>check my privilege, ask to be castrated

>judge denies request because I’m white

>apologize

>go to jail

>cell mate is person of color

>apologize

>check my privilege and ask their pronouns

>get raped by cell mate

>check my privilege

>I’ve been doing this to Africans for centuries

>shame deep in my butthole

>400 YEARS

>apologize

>mfw I’m still part of the patriarchy