Growing up, I always knew I was different. I didn’t fit in at school, I had trouble socially with my family and classmates…it wasn’t until I was fifteen that I discovered I was just stuck in the wrong body.

Nobody has a problem with transsexuals, but it seems like if your body identity has to do with things other than gender, you’re seen as a “freak” or a “poser”. Well, that’s just part of the oppression I go through on a daily basis. While my real name is Dylan, and while I look like a regular white man in his early twenties, I identify as a female Japanese lesbian demisexual unicorn with only one leg. My real name is Kiki.

Some people might say I’m “crazy”. Those people would probably never say that about someone with BDD, or someone who was transsexual. This is the problem I’m having…and the worst part is that while a transsexual person can go around dressing like the gender of their choice, passing most of the time, I can’t pass as Kiki. I’ve tried and failed numerous times, been kicked out of multiple restaurants and was even banned from my town’s local playground for “disturbing the peace”. But to me, I feel comfortable ONLY when I am Kiki. When I am Dylan, I feel…misplaced.

So please, respect me and understand that I may be “different” but I face just as much oppression as anyone else in the world. I don’t see why nobody should understand the systematic racism and sexism against me, just because I “seem” like an able-bodied, straight white male. Yes, that is the shell that Kiki is within. I wish people would just open their hearts.

And while I prefer the pronouns: zha/zhaa/zhae, I understand if you make mistakes. Nobody’s perfect! :)