The Twelve Signs of the Coronavirus Zodiac

The world has been hit by a pandemic, in the form of coronavirus. All of us are affected, but not all of use will respond in the same way. We’ll be influenced by a host of internal and external factors, and one thing that can’t be avoided is our star sign. If you’re a Scorpio, for example, you’ll have Scorpionic strategies for dealing with problem, and by understanding the strengths and weaknesses of your star sign you’ll have a good chance of weathering the storm.

I mention Scorpio because that’s my brother’s star sign. It is a defensive sign, which understands that death can always be round the next corner. I was a bit worried about him. He’s self-employed, and I assumed that he would be in a bad way, with the crisis destroying his business. Actually, he was on great form. He had made some money shorting the stock market, and he had just ordered a generator and an oxygen concentrator. He reasoned that when coronavirus hits peak, the hospitals are going to be full, and if he got pneumonia, the oxygen concentrator would buy him a few extra days. Naturally, he wasn’t leaving the house, and all his future purchases are going to be online.

So what I am now going to do is go through the twelve signs of the Zodiac. For each sign I will have four sections: general reaction, do this, don’t do that and a list of celebrities who have coronavirus. The lists are a bit short at the moment, but I expect to add to them very soon. I understand that what I write is a massive generalization, but I haven’t got your horoscope, only your star sign.

Aries

General reaction: You’re an Aries and you want to deal with the coronavirus by taking action. And you’re not going to allow the virus to get in the way of your basic freedoms.

Do this: Be a leader. Inspire those around you to protect themselves from the disease. You can this this through internet discussions, not face-to-face meetings. And if anyone is being careless or irresponsible, given them a blast of your anger.

Don’t do that: Don’t allow yourself to get frustrated, and don’t get angry if more sensible voices tell you to slow down. And whatever you do, don’t think that you’re above the coronavirus. In fact rash actions, typical of your star sign, could get you infected.

Famous Ariens with coronavirus: Mikel Arteta (head coach of Arsenal FC).

Taurus

General reaction: You’re a Taurus and you have a down to earth approach to living and dying. Diseases happen and they’re part of the human condition – but you won’t let them get in the way of the earthy pleasures.

Do this: Work out a plan and stick with it. Your stubbornness might be annoying to friends, family and workmates, but you know what you are doing. When you’re close to plants and greenery you can forget about the virus and relax.

Don’t do that: Don’t touch! For many Taureans, tactile contact is important, and is something that happens without thinking. You may even think that physical touch is more important than physical safety. Get your priorities right.

Famous Taureans with coronavirus: Sophie Trudeau (wife of the Canadian Prime Minister).

Gemini

General reaction: Many Geminis find it difficult to take things seriously. Coronavirus? Something interesting, which provides facts, figures and gossip. Indeed by talking about the coronavirus Geminis may be trivializing it. Famous Geminis include U.S. President and declared germaphone Donald Trump.

Do this: Go and find out as much as you can about coronavirus. Sift through the facts and explain your discoveries. Also, be objective, and consider alternative points of view.

Don’t do that: Don’t talk too much, because at a certain stage you might become annoying. Or you might trash the stock market, if you’re Donald Trump. And don’t fidget – in particular don’t touch your face when you’re in public places. In fact, you shouldn’t be in public places. And don’t trivialize things, for example by writing coronvirus horoscopes for the twelve star signs.

Famous Geminis with coronavirus: Andy Cohen (US talk show host), Boris Johnson (British Prime Minister).

Cancer

General reaction: The coronavirus makes you think about yourself and your vital interests. You understand which people matter and which people are just optional extras. The protection of home and family comes first.

Do this: Cancer is a nurturing sign, and while the crisis continues you’ll look after your loved ones. It is also a great time to show sympathy and emotional generosity. You may not be able to hug, but you can keep everyone close through digital technology.

Don’t do that: Most Cancerians have a touch of paranoia, and when the world is falling apart you might feel that it’s time for extreme measures. Barricades, canned food and perhaps even a gun or two. However don’t be more suspicious than you have to be.

Famous Cancerians with coronavirus: Tom Hanks (actor), Rudy Gobert (NBA basketball player).

Leo

General reaction: You like to be the centre of attention, and if you’re not in a position of leadership you might regard the crisis as being bad for your ego. Yet many Leos have a sense of the dramatic, and you may enjoy the drama of being in the middle of a zombie apocalypse.

Do this: It is a time when you can keep everyone’s spirits up. Be an example, and tell everyone that they can handle the situation. If you’re stuck at home with your family, you can be not just a leader, but also an inspiration.

Don’t do that: Don’t go out of your way to seek praise, don’t be the hero who is out volunteering for the sake of volunteering. And don’t get upset if everyone ignores you. And if you do get coronavirus, remember that you’re not the only person in the world who has got it.

Famous Leos with coronavirus: Daniele Rugani (Juventus soccer player), Evangelos Marinakis (Greek businessman, owner of the Olympiakos and Nottingham Forest soccer teams), Daniel Dae Kim (actor).

Virgo

General reaction: You may feel that your time has arrived. After all, 70% of Virgos are obsessed with cleanliness and hygiene. You want to be well prepared, like the five wise virgins in the parable. But remember – there were also five foolish virgins.

Do this: Your job is to take care of things, and make sure that all the details are looked after. Other people might try to help, but they’re just not on your level. You might also want to hand out detailed plans, so that everyone can stay safe.

Don’t do that: Don’t get obsessed about the disease. And remember, we’ve all got to die some time. Also, a large minority of Virgos are hypocrites. They’ll give lots of advice, and then not follow it. Like taking off your face mask to kiss your best friend who has just arrived back from decontamination duty at the local quarantine centre.

Famous Virgos with coronavirus: Massoumeh Ebtekar (Iranian Vice President), Idris Elba (actor), Linda Lusardi (UK TV presenter and former model).

Libra

General reaction: If you’re typical of your sign, you’ll regard the coronavirus as a disaster. You like mixing with people, and social isolation just doesn’t suit you. Yet if you’re a devious Libran, as a few are, you might see the crisis as a way to take advantage of other people’s weaknesses.

Do this: You’re the link, the person everyone knows. Reach out to the world through email and social media, and create some online bonhomie. And if resources become scarce your intrinsic fairness will shine through.

Don’t do that: Don’t be tempted to break the rules. You might think that you can visit a friend, or go on a quick holiday to the Caribbean, but the price could be the virus. And don’t allow yourself to be talked into taking risks.

Famous Librans with coronavirus: Luis Sepúlveda (Chilean writer), Francis Suarez (mayor of Miami), Li Wenliang (Chinese doctor who gave first warning about the coronavirus), Nicola Zingaretti (Italian politician), Mario Diaz-Balart (US congressman), Matt Hancock (British health minister).

Scorpio

General reaction: Actually, you’re not particularly surprised. You know that bad things happen, that pestilence and famine are part of the human condition. You take the situation seriously, but with a grim smile.

Do this: Enjoy the intensity of the experience. There’s lots of emotion flying around, and it makes you feel alive. In terms of other people, you can demonstrate your psychotherapeutic skills, and help heal the surrounding chaos and paranoia.

Don’t do that: Don’t get into death mode. In other words thinking we’re all doomed, and that there is nothing we can do to prevent the unwinding collapse. Coronavirus is bad, but it’s not the Black Death.

Famous Scorpios with coronavirus: Rita Wilson (singer, wife of Tom Hanks), Peter Dutton (Australian home affairs minister), Olga Kurylenko (actress), Rachel Matthews (actress), Pere Aragonès (Catalonian politician), Prince Charles (heir to the British throne).

Sagittarius

General reaction: Sagittarians are reacting in many different ways. Some are feeling depressed about the situation, because their essential freedom is being blocked. Others are excited by the global extent of the crisis. But you have clear ideas about the best way of dealing with the situation.

Do this: Make people laugh! Sagittarians are the comedians of the Zodiac, and there is no harm in seeing the funny side of the virus. But on a serious note, use your intuition. Deep down you know what it’s all about and where it is leading. Your intuitive knowledge gives you power.

Don’t do that: Don’t travel, don’t go to parties. That seems obvious, but Sagittarians like to keep moving, and that could be dangerous. And be careful what you say – if honesty gets taken too far it becomes explosive.

Famous Sagittarians with coronavirus: Kristofer Hivju (actor), Ben McAdams (US congressman).

Capricorn

General reaction: You take coronavirus seriously, and you’re taking quiet action to protect yourself and your loved ones. You’re also annoyed at other people’s incompetence. Things could have been a whole lot better if they had been properly organized. If only the US President was a fellow Capricorn… even if that Capricorn was Richard Nixon.

Do this: You know that the buck stops with you. It is up to you to make sure that everything runs smoothly, though you mustn’t be afraid of delegating responsibility.

Don’t do that: Don’t exhaust yourself. You’re living in troubling times, but you can’t be responsible for everything. So don’t get up too early, and don’t work harder than you have to. Right now you need to be healthy, and your immune system needs to be as strong as possible.

Famous Capricorns with coronavirus: Franck Riester (French culture minister), Quim Torra (Catalonian politician), Karl von Habsburg (Austrian politician and head of the House of Habsburg), Michel Barnier (European politician and negotiator), Fiona Phillips (British TV presenter), Rand Paul (US senator).

Aquarius

General reaction: You’re not the same as other people. You’re different, and you’re approach is absolutely unique. This means that your reaction demonstrates your core individuality. However, it is at times like this that you value modern technology.

Do this: It is true that you have to listen to generally accepted advice about the coronavirus, but that doesn’t mean you have to be a clone. Be inventive, and work out novel solutions for dealing with the problem. Let disease be the mother of invention.

Don’t do that: Your individuality can be taken too far. You are a human being, with the same frailties as other people, and if you break the rules you could become sick. Also, don’t let the coronavirus catapult you into over-the-top weirdness.

Famous Aquarians with coronavirus: Michał Woś (Polish environment minister), Placido Domingo (opera singer).

Pisces

General reaction: You go with the flow. You can feel what is going on around you, and you’ll respond accordingly. In some ways that makes life easier, because you don’t have to make too many decisions. But don’t be afraid of asking questions.

Do this: Pisces is a sign that is sympathetic and emotionally aware. You understand people’s worries, and you’re just the person to listen to their problems. Also, it is a good time to explore your artistic talents. Coronavirus can be a drag, but it can also be your muse.

Don’t do that: Don’t just follow the crowd! The panic of the crowd could so easily be your panic, and you need to step back and do some critical thinking. On a different note, don’t be a martyr – in a social setting, a good but stupid deed could turn you into another statistic.

Famous Pisceans with coronavirus: Prince Albert of Monaco (monarch), Harvey Weinstein (movie producer).

While I have got your attention, I am considering offering a free online astrology course. Now might be a good time to offer a free course – coronavirus means that people have more free time, but also less money. I have been practicing astrology since 1987, and am familiar with most areas of astrology. If you are interested, and you are prepared to commit to something like a five-week course, please email me at consultarchie at gmail.com. Tell me what kind of things you want to learn about. For example, do you want a beginners’ course?