Blood vs Water Character Rankings. To me, nothing is more important to a show than its characters. Like any story, they are the only reason to care. So I created this personal ranking of characters. Whether they’re entertaining, influential, memorable, relatable, or some magical combination thereof, no season is worth anything without good characters. This is ranking solely on character value judged by my own opinion. I might have your favorites low and some wtf picks high. This is my list and I hope it sparks good discussion and you identify with it but you’re not obligated to agree.

Be warned. This is very very long.

20th: Colton Cumbie.

What a letdown. I was firmly in the camp of “why are you bringing him back for gods sake” but on the other hand I was intrigued. He was engaged to what seemed like the sweetest, most cuddly man on Earth, and I wanted to see that other side of Colton. The side that Caleb Bankston would fall in love with.

I’m incredibly disappointed that he quit. I try to avoid the “quitters are sub human slug fuckers” circlejerk, but even I’m aggravated that he quit six days in even if I don’t believe his first “quit” is anything more controversial than a Dana Lambert thing. I’m aggravated because we were robbed of a potentially great character arc. Either he shows that other side and becomes a great redemption story or he finally gets his just desserts and is shown he is a bad player by way of nine votes. Instead he cries and walks out and all we get is Jeff humiliating Colton in front of his fiance. It’s telling when the only thing you get out of a character are a few good John Carroll rants.

Again, such a letdown.

19th: Rachel Fougler.

Every season there’s gonna be one person who we won’t get to see much of. Someone who might be perfectly nice but overall insignificant as a character. Like Lorie Daugherty before her Rachel was instrumental in motivating her loved one to eventually win the season, and prevents Tyson from entering RI for her. It’s possible to say the season would not be the same without her. However, for being the season igniting MacGuffin hardass snarkmeister Tyson cries for after she departs, we didn’t get to see that. We didn’t get to see much of her at all. She was more or less a nice and quiet woman who didn’t dazzle the cameras as much as her larger than life boyfriend for whatever reason.

18th: Kat Edorsson

I feel like this season we got a few outtakes of Kat from One World thrown in with the BvW footage more than getting an actual character. Up until her vote out there wasn’t much to say other than she was mildly funny. Her voteout and arc thereafter was some great TV but in a season of dynamic characters it’s hard not to see BvW Kat as more than a few quirky moments.

17th: Candice Cody.

Where was this Candice in the past two seasons? How did such a bland character suddenly get such life into her? I can’t say I was always a fan but seeing her in the background glaring daggers into the souls of the bastards who voted out both her and her husband was a treat and a great step up. She’s this low due to just how many great charactere there were this season but I wish this was the Candice we saw in Cook Islands and HvV.

16th: Marissa Peterson

Were I in her shoes, automatically thrown into a minority and picked off cause of the actions of her uncle, I’d be pissed too. Does she fulfill the archetype of Angry Black Woman a little too closely? Maybe. But Marissa had miles of untapped potential that could have made her one of the greats. She was a force throughout her few episodes and provided perhaps the most iconic quote of the season. If there is ever an early boot season sign this lady up.

15th: Rupert Boneham.

Controversial opinion: I don’t think Rupert Boneham’s storyline could have ended any better than it did. He has fallen out of favor with his audience under the idea that he’s become a fake And a blowhard. I’ll admit that even though I like Rupert I wasn’t looking forward to a season with Rupert entirely throughout it, because his antics suck all the attention out of a room. It must say something when even my mother, still a die hard Rupert fan, responds to his casting with “really? Again?”

However, for a legendary Survivor Hero (give or take) and one of the show’s most complex and flawed characters, he ends on one of the sweetest notes when he almost immediately gives up a pre game alliance and his spot in the game for his wife to play instead. For someone whose actions come off as staged and character aware, this was a move with real repercussions and a real sacrifice. It’s the best thing that could be the last we see of Rupert.

14th: John Cody.

DearJohn Cody is one of the biggest harlequin cover dreamboats this show will ever see. Adorable blue eyed heartthrob with a Chiesled body who serves in the military and loves his wife to tears and appreciates her asserting her independence and strength throughout the season, who doesn’t hold onto anger and focuses on playing the game and being there for Candice? Do they make men like him in a factory, because he is like perfection. However I feel like that summary accurately described his character and there’s nothing left to say. Flawless to a fault.

13th: Aras Baskauskas.

I’m a gigantic Aras fan. Really and truly. I think his win in Panama is one of the most ingenious and underrated. When Probst said he was the most boring winner I about bitchslapped my TV. When there was a very real chance of him winning the show a second time I was happy. However, as a character, I found him a lot less compelling than his Panamanian incarnation.

Aras was a complex and offbeat hero in his first season. Brash and careless at times but still the moral glue of the story. However, in this season he was often the infallible golden boy good guy and his purpose almost entirely lies in the hands of others. He is the kingpin Tyson must strike down to win. He is the product of his brother’s redemption quest. He is the catalyst of Laura Morett’s Redemption Island run. As his own character he didn’t stand up the way he did in Exile Island. Solid overall? Yes. I was still rooting for him. But as a character he simply takes the shadow of some of the greater characters this season.

12th: Laura Morett

I underestimated Morett. I had no clue that she would go on to be a driving character that would last the entire season. Like Aras she suffers the fate of being almost entirely the supporting character of her daughter Ciera, but she makes up for that by being a complex character with flaws and strengths, good moments and bad, and very much improves her standing as a character from Samoa to Blood vs Water. And her kicking ass on Redemption Island was a sight to see as well.

11th: Caleb Bankston.

I adore Caleb. He’s a cuddly and adorable Southern Gentleman who’d make Bobby Jon Drinkard proud. He’s respectful to ladies and is good to people and has strong character and doesn’t give up. He also happens to be gay and engaged to Satan Survivor himself, Colton.

Ultimately the editors and Probst would shoehorn him into a box of being Mr. I Can’t Believe He’s Fucking Colton, and it’s a shame, because Caleb has a lot of complexities and character. Going into the game would you expect him to be the one to turn things around in the premerge and blindside Brad Culpepper in such an epic way? There is so much beneath the silent, warm demeanor of Caleb and I wish we’d have gotten to see more of it. This is the man who fights until the end even when it’s no use. Quiet he may be but simple he is not.

10th: Laura Boneham.

It should be no controversial statement to say that Laura is an odd duck. But even in the context of Survivor characters she is unique. A pre merge 45 year old female challenge beast with awkward and funny little idiosyncrasies who talks and articulates almost identically to her husband? She is just so out there. The thing is, though, as a character she works. She goes beyond the early out kooky older lady archetype and reveals herself to be not only entertaining but the center of some great arcs, including her own, where her inability to lie in a game free to all sorts of dishonesty goes well with her socially awkward farm girl demeanor. You’d be forgiven for having little confidence in her game as Laurabee was never about the game, but about what it’s like to be someone thrown to the wolves.

9th: Gervase Peterson.

Like Skupin before him, this old school native was thrown into a twist heavy hyper metagame era of Survivor that kept on biggering. And Gervase was able to navigate it rather well, actually turning things around for old Pagong and join an alliance to do some Pagonging himself. Furthermore, Gervase was funny, whether by his own accord or at his own expense. Dramatic, self-unaware, and over the top, Gervase knew how to take a scene and make it his. He was never going to win but it wasn’t because of him being stuck in the olden days. It was because sometimes it’s not your game that needs to change as much as your personality and behavior.

8th: Katie Collins

Katie Collins was a background character and we can’t kid ourselves on that regard. However, in the background, either she was funny or the things happening to or around her were also funny. Quirky, a little awkward, and exceptionally real, Katie’s girl next door attitude was a fresh contrast to camera ready, over the top comrades. She wasn’t a good liar, her own mother mocked her lack of competitive spirit, and her reaction to being involved in one of the most legendary eliminations ever is to make a bad pun. But that’s what makes Katie such a unique character. She’s one of those people who isn’t afraid to be herself. Even funnier, she was a few votes away from slipping through to the finals and scoring a victory with four secured Jury Votes at least, as everyone had forgotten her. What a perfect way to end her storyline that could have been.

7th: Hayden Moss.

Almost everyone I knew reacted derisively to the idea of a Big Brother plebe leaving his cushy house and playing a real game. And it’s safe to say Hayden was a late bloomer. Although he provided some great quips throughout the episodes, he didn’t really shine until his back was against the wall.

But holy fuck, that’s when it began. It’s safe to say that he almost singlehandedly made a stretch of three episodes amazing. Not only that, but he expanded the metagame and made insane things happen. In Tribal Council he argued someone into drawing rocks rather than getting into the Final 4 for free. He got someone to draw rocks. Gregg fell and Savaii was decimated for the sake of avoiding the rock. Fear of the rock has toppled kingdoms and he got someone to give up her rank in the game for the sake of chance.

Hayden made crazy things happen and made them happen masterfully. Even if he really shone for three episodes he made what could have been three boring episodes into a streak of legend. For that, we thank him.

6th: Brad Culpepper.

If there was an award for best pre merge character Brad Culpepper should at least be in the running. He’s everything you could hope for in an incompetent villain. Cocky livewire with a redeeming side and a lot of funny moments and turns out to be a really good guy and a divisive character. He was an awful player and caused mass chaos in his wake, but it was insanely entertaining. And when he was voted out he was an excellent sport and revealed himself to be a great guy and loving husband, not the evil sexist prick people tried to paint him as. That’s a lot of depth for someone so crazy and destructive. This season was much better for having him in it.

5th: Vytas Baskauskas

This man was a contradiction and excellent foil to his brother. A smart and serene yoga teachee and former heroine addict, whose devious nature undercut his brother’s love and compassion. He went from being inspiring and calm to jarringly angry and arrogant and yet could still keep your attention throughout. He could make you feel any which way yet you still like him at the end. He’s frustrating, attractive, agreeable, disagreeable, unnerving, relatable, and many more all at once. That’s the mark of a true human being and a character.

4th: Monica Culpepper

Monica Culpepper had no business returning to Survivor. She was a 14th placer nobody with 5-7 confessionals and 15 days to hold her legacy. She had no business returning just because her husband played football. She had no business becoming a challenge dominator and role model. She had no business becoming one of the most pivotal characters of the season and a total star. She had no business becoming a tragic character unsure of what she wants other than to feel of worth, of value, to feel like she IS somebody.

And thank god she was brought back. Because she proved to be somebody worth remembering.

3rd: Tyson Apostol.

A weird thing happens when returning players either win or do well. Sadly, they are often neutered or manipulated to becoming a straight up gamebot or they lose the zest that made them amazing enough to return for a second or third or even fourth season in the first place. I personally am so thankful this didn’t happen to Tyson.

Tyson got better at the game and he was more focused on it. However, he was still as sharp and articulate as before, and just as funny. Almost every time he’s on camera or at least once an episode he does or says something funny or memorable. He’s subtler, but he’s more evolved on a character and human level. No one can be quite like Tyson but now we know he’s human like us and it’s a fantastic conclusion to his journey to see him win while still being the person we fell in love with in Tocantins, just more mature.

2nd: Tina Wesson.

Although I begrudgingly put her at second, Tina is my favorite character of this season and my favorite part. Even if she didn’t have as big of an impact on it or as fantastic of a story arc as number one, she gets points solely for being who she is, and the same woman who won Australia. Tina was fantastic already and this cements her as god tier in Survivor Mount Rushmore.

Tina was the sweet Southern mom willing to cut a bitch and do whatever it took to win Survivor again. She was not ever considered a threat despite having one win under her belt, and created a dream team alliance with Aras to control the camp the same way she did Australia. After it was all toppled she was still underestimated, only voted out after both Baskauskas Brothers before going on to best them both. Laura Morett kept her around because she was easy to beat on RI only to beg Tina for mercy as she destroyed her on the final challenge. Fifty years old and indestructible, it only took the final vote to finally put an end to Tina’s game as she finished in the place of honor many greats before and after her had placed.

Tina is amazing becayse everything she does has a million reasons and motivators. She’s endlessly complex and has so many sides to her. The world may never know the full extent of Tina Wesson. It’s amazing to watch her play and interact with others, especially when you know her historic context. She doesn’t waste a moment on screen with her gentle Southern accent and the knife it cuts like. We are lucky as viewers that not only could an old school legend return but she could come back even better than before.

1st: Ciera Eastin.

When they were casting for this season, all around they made a great season out of what could have been a train wreck concept by casting some fantastic characters. But nowhere was more gold struck than with 24 year old Conservative Christian Teen Mom Family Woman Ciera.

Everything you want out of this season, she gave. Personal evolution, cutthroat gaming against one’s own family, the ability to act and not sit idly, and the emotional and philosophical depth that is often lost in her age demographic. Ciera gave the audience exactly what they wanted and became a legend throughout her arc.

She was well spoken, witty, strategically adept, and refused to give up. Even when her moves were misfires, they still added to the season. She started off as a weak young woman who failed challenges and was always on the chopping block and became a blossom who grew with the game, willing to make big moves and cut her mother’s throat, draw rocks, and even bust out an immunity win to get ahead, all without losing her humanity or strength. How much of an impact did she leave on the show? When she was finally voted out, she got her very own music piece as she was eliminated.

Ciera Eastin was perfect to play this season and this was her story.