Imagine the scene: a girl puts forward her opinion in a class discussion and a couple of boys respond with demeaning jeers. They make sexually suggestive comments and threats of physical violence.



The rest of the class roll their eyes but accept the abuse as normal. How many teenage girls would continue to speak up in that kind of environment?



It sounds outrageous, doesn’t it? And yet that is exactly what’s happening online to thousands of women every day. Chances are, if your teenage girl is active online, she’s been subjected to some unpleasant comments.



[Related content: Internet safety tips for parents]

















And if she’s opinionated, if she blogs, or if she simply has a few publicly available photographs then she’s at risk of highly sexualised online aggression.



Online aggression



Women in the public eye, such as female bloggers and journalists, are starting to speak out about the anonymous abuse they receive through comments and tweets. The majority of the violent, graphic comments come from a minority of men.



As a female journalist, I also receive an astonishing level of sexualised comments and sexist put-downs. It’s always worse when an article includes a photograph of me, as this often reduces the debate to a discussion of my looks.



Obviously this is not all men. It’s a very tiny, unpleasant minority. And while social media has given this abuse an anonymous outlet, it’s not the cause.



But this is an issue that needs challenging if we’re not going to silence a generation of women. I’m old enough and tough enough to laugh it off. Teenage girls are working out where they fit into the world. They are starting to see themselves as sexual beings and forming an identity. If they receive a stream of sexualised, aggressive comments every time they put forward an opinion then that must affect their self esteem.





[Related content: My internet bullying hell]







Friendly fire



However, the comments don't always come from me, and they don't always come from strangers. Hayley Trowbridge, who’s studying for a PhD in communication and media at the University of Liverpool, works on social media projects with teenage girls caught up in gang culture. Hayley believes that fellow teens are the biggest threat to the wellbeing of girls.



“Women are not very nice to young women on social media,” she explained. “When I was in school, people passed notes. But a comment left online can be far more damaging because it’s public.



“It’s not just a nasty comment in the toilets, it’s something posted for the world to see. It’s more permanent and visible, which is damaging and embarrassing.”



Protecting your family



It’s important parents make sure children and teenagers enjoy all the benefits of the internet without being damaged or shaped by its more malicious content.



Hayley says the fundamental rules of tackling bullying are still relevant. “The obsession with internet trolling is because it’s more visible. When I was at school, people used to write notes – the offline version of trolling.



“But all the old rules still apply – talk to your teenagers about the dangers, and contact the school if your teen is being bullied online.”





Communication is essential so keep talking to your teens. And try not to be confrontational; the last thing you want to do is make it hard for them to bring any concerns to you or discuss what’s upset them.



Conversations to have with teenage children:











Discuss the dangers of sharing pictures or videos. Anyone can take that content and edit it, which can be very distressing.

Remind your teen that people can lie online and they should never meet strangers without taking an adult they trust along with them.

Show an interest in what your teen is doing online. Ask them to show you the new apps they’re using; this lets you chat about their web use without any confrontation.

Make sure your teen understands how to block anyone that makes them feel uncomfortable, across all the different social websites they use.

Encourage your teen to protect themselves with tight security settings, so that strangers can’t access their details.

Have you experienced this kind of online abuse? Are you worried about what it might do to your own children? How can people protect their families?





























































