“Have you killed any men today? If not, why not?”

Charming.

These are the words allegedly scrawled in ballpoint ink recently by controversial Australian feminist, columnist and author Clementine Ford.

The two, short lines were addressed to a reader and written inside the cover of her latest book Fight Like A Girl.

While she has become well-known for her staunch feminist views and for being fearless in the face of relentless online trolling by men who oppose them, I can’t help but think this short, handwritten note crosses a line.

With about 170,000 followers on Facebook, Ms Ford’s page describes her interests and issues in society that she would like to see change, they include: “men’s violence against women; exclusion of marginalised groups including disabled people, trans and gender queer people, people of colour and women; reproductive rights; sexism; movies I like”.

All sounds pretty reasonable to me – although, I think the preferred term is “people with a disability”.

But with regards to asking a fan if she’d “killed any men today” and likewise, when it comes to men harassing Ms Ford, calling her names and cruelly picking on her looks, I have to ask the question – why can’t we, as (mostly) fully grown, educated adults in a largely free and prosperous Western nation, debate social issues without spewing so much hate?

Joking about murdering nameless, faceless, innocent men?

I like to think I’ve got a pretty solid sense of humour but I don’t find this funny at all.

Furthermore, I feel like threatening speech like this weakens the position of feminism in society, and makes it sound more like what all those trolls seem to want to turn it into – man hating, plain and simple.

I wholeheartedly feel that gender issues should be something that we have an ongoing and open dialogue about – we’ve got a long way to go, after all.

Yes, even in Australia.

Violence against women, the gender pay gap, lack of female representation in politics and in boardrooms across the country, just to name a few matters.

But as crucial as it is to work towards turning these issues around, spewing vitriol at one another does nothing to move us along.

Another example of useless, pointless hostility that has made headlines this week is the abuse aimed at a Brisbane-based, all-female plumbing company, Tradettes.

The service has been trolled online by anti-feminist activists, who are accusing it of being sexist and, in turn, have left multiple bad reviews on its Facebook page, suggesting the female plumbers are doing a poor job.

Again, why?

Just as a sidenote, I can’t believe being an “anti-feminist” is actually a thing.

But apparently, it is.

Any way you look at it, to lump all of one gender into a group and decide you hate them collectively, is ridiculous.

Women are amazing and if you know and love one, you should be a feminist.

It’s not radical. It’s just commonsense.

But men are incredible too. Some of my closest, dearest friends and colleagues are smart, funny, kind, generous and respectful men – and without them, my world would be a much dimmer one.

Sure, from time to time, we may not share the same viewpoint, even when it comes to gender issues and societal priorities.

But we can debate these matters sensibly and (mostly) calmly, without resorting to threats and pointless, hurtful speech.

So, I ask you: have you killed any hateful thinking today? And if not, why not?