Magic, my fellow royal subjects, has returned to the shores of the British Empire. It has been 300 years since the last time our isle played home to ships made of rain and horses with muscles of sand. It is a fantastic time to be alive indeed, as both Messrs. Strange and Norrell have pledged to aid Britain in the war against Napoleon.

Interested in how not one, but two master magicians could pop up at such a fortuitous time, yours truly personally snuck into one of Mr. Norrell’s famous soirees. It was there that I first heard mention, outside of the realm of children’s books, that of fairy magic. Apparently to work some of the more powerful spells in existence, one must actually call upon the aid of these dangerous, otherworldly creatures.

I subsequently sent letters to both Jonathan Strange & Mr. Norrell, asking as innocently as I could what fairies an aspiring magician might be wary of. I wanted to know just how dangerous the fae folk could truly be, and after sifting through Mr. Norrell’s condescension and Strange’s bloviated novella of a response, I have compiled a list of extremely dangerous fairies.

Aeval: A Queen who resides in southwestern Munster, Aeval is prone to sitting in judgement upon those who summon her. Not only can her rulings be harsh, but she often does not confine her judgement to her conjurer. One of her more ancient rulings actually involved every male in the local township being found guilty.

ErlKonig: A Germanic fairy king, ErlKonig is powerful indeed. Be mindful of his appearance when you summon him, however, for he always chooses to appear resembling the mechanism of his summoner’s death.

Fir Darrig: A darker conjuration resembling Shakespeare’s Puck, Fir Darrig is a trickster who delights in gruesome practical jokes. Only those who play his games are granted any magical boon. While his tricks themselves cannot harm the living, the madness that they bring about surely can.

The Glaistig: This water fairie always appears wearing a flowing green gown, beneath which she hides her goat-like lower extremities. She is deadly to men, whom she feeds on after asking them for a dance. She has a weakness for both the elderly and the young, and might grant powerful magical boons to a magician of the proper age. She is not to be confused with her sister Jenny Greenteeth, however, who takes glee in drowning children.

The Killmoulis: Only found in old and abandoned mills; this carbuncled, mouthless fairy is an appalling sight. Conjure him if you want to become a miller, for he will make you an instant success at it, but never watch him eat his supper (which he does through his nose) or your fairy helper will turn from benign to wicked, playing all manner of pranks upon you.

Kul: A water fairy from the northernmost expanses of the globe, Kul often likes to grant bountiful fishing harvests to those who call upon him. Be careful to offer him a share of your catch, for he quickly becomes malevolent and murderous if this tariff is not paid.

Plant Rhys Dwfen: Not one, but a family of fairies, clan Plant Rhys Dwfen are wealthy beyond human comprehension. A handsome, diminutive breed, they delight in paying exorbitant sums for human-made goods. Of course, being that none of us mortals could ever afford their prices, any goods they purchase are forfeit to the world of fairie forever. Due to a mix of greed and their lavish spending sprees, the Plant Rhys Dwfen have been known to leave entire nations destitute of any goods whatsoever (except for handfuls of now-meaningless currency).

Urisk: Damned with an appearance that is frightening to our eyes, this fairy craves human attention but receives none. He is skittish in nature, residing only in and around still pools of water. He can be a great friend to you, but your every moment with him will be filled with terror.

Yann-an-Od: Long ago, Yann-an-Od was king of a fairie nation, but his subjects (aided by humans) deposed him. Now, still clothed in his finery, he wanders open fields in search of a new flock to rule over. He is particularly fond of sheep in this regard, but cannot suffer the presence of competing shepherds. Leave him to his own devices and your livestock may sprout golden fleece. Confront him, and you may join the bleating throng.

If, dear reader, you are aware of further dangerous fae creatures, please inform us immediately so that we may warn both the public as well as Britain’s growing number of magicians-in-training.

Featured Image Credit: BBC America