A Secret to Become Socially Well Rounded

The other day I came across someone who was complaining about how he didn’t have an education and didn’t know what direction to take in life. He explained that he had no idea how to change his life nor did he have any talents that could change his life.

He considered himself to be a boring person who wanted to change for the better. But every option I gave him would only turn into a negative response. It wouldn’t have bothered me as much if it wasn’t for the fact he gave himself an obstacle for every solution I offered.

Like that man, most people believe that they’re boring with nothing to offer the world. Men are scared to approach women because they have no idea what to say after they greet them. Strangers are scared to approach others because the fear of being judged.

We all thrive to become well rounded people who can capture everyone’s attention and yet despite those dreams, still continue to suffer with our own insecurities.

This type of mindset cause people to setback their life without them knowing. Without the ability to effectively communicate with others, we put ourselves at a disadvantage from the rest of the world. If we can’t tell our boss how to solve a problem, we only become a nuisance despite how intelligent we are. If we can’t flirt properly with the opposite sex, it could send wrong intentions to them that might end up breaking the relationship.

That’s why there was a quote that I really enjoyed below that I wished my teenager self knew:

“Read. As much as your can. As deeply and widely and nourishing and irritatingly as you can. And the good things will make you remember the, so you won’t need to take.” -A.L. Kennedy

This quote rocks because it’s a habit that everyone should apply daily because it makes conversations easier to withhold. It’s what keeps me confident in what I have to share and what I know about the world. The human mind is like a computer, and books are the updates we need to keep it fresh and active.

What’s the main method to become well rounded and stop being boring?

It first starts of with

“Sharing your knowledge with others”

For those not familiar with this practice, you’ll discover that by sharing what you recently learned with others, whether it be strangers, friends, or family; not only will it make the other person more interested in you, but your self-confidence will drastically increase.

Studies show that teaching others about facts they weren’t aware of provides us with a sense of power because it places us in a teacher’s seat.

Research published in “International Journal of Happiness and Development“, it was uncovered that social connections help our behavior because it gives us positive feelings when we give to others. Some people prefer giving through volunteering as others prefer donations.

You may not have the time or resources to give to others in those ways, but you still have a mind and that’s all you’ll need to give birth to positive emotions. In most conversations you have with people, share topics you previously learned about that could open the door to stimulating discussions.

A common tool that I use is an app called cracked, which provides entertaining topics of discussions. Through personal experiences, when I’m on a date or with a friend, when a silent moment occurs I bring up recent studies I read about.

1. Stay updated on the latest news

Bookmark CNN, News, the Yahoo News Digest App, The Daily Water Cooler, Cracked, CNN, and The New York Times on your web browser. If possible, download those apps onto your phone so you could be alerted on newsworthy notification topics.

Find something that interest you and keep track of the top stories and headlines. That way, if you face an awkward silent moment with someone, simply inform them about it and bring up a topic of discussion.

2. Subscribe to Netflix

If you don’t have a subscription to Netflix, get one so you could watch documentaries, the history channel, and any source of education on there. There’s a variety of information to choose from that’ll expand your knowledge and boost your self-confidence.

3. Read, read, and read BOOKS

Don’t go after general fiction books such as Harry Potter or Twilight. Choose a book that’ll expand your knowledge, challenge your thoughts, and give you a general topic to talk to people about. Books to start with are:

by Dan Ariely

by Neil Fiore

by Chip Heath & Dan Heath

4. Pick up a hobby

Do whatever that somewhat interest you. Even if a person dislike every topic that crosses their mind, they could find even the simplest thing worth noticing. It could be doodling, listening to music, speaking to people, or people watch.

Every person has a general sense of interest and it’s up to you to figure it out. There’s people who enjoy video games and found ways to make a living out of it by making YouTube videos and providing entertaining commentaries to share. Find a hobby and learn from it so you could tell others about your experiences in it.

5. Expose yourself

Escape your comfort zone by picking up an activity that deals with communities or groups. It’s difficult for people to see their own talents until an external source reveals it to them.

Also, spending time with others to achieve a common goal or interest is what brings people closer together. The longer we spend time with someone, the easier it becomes to share our thoughts, interests, and dreams.

In final thoughts….

By simply gaining a general level of knowledge from any of these sources, it’ll open doors to many conversations with people. Spend 10 – 20 minutes a day on news articles that catches your eye. Your brain may not retain all the information, but it’ll soak in enough to be able to start conversations with others.

Just reading a topic about what happened in another country for 5 minutes could stir up a 20 minute conversation with someone you meet.

For more articles like this, check out:

How to Force Yourself to Socialize as an Introvert

How to Socialize As an Introvert: Skills for Survival

5 Easy Ways to Master Your Social Skills