Item #: SCP-009-J

Object Class: Fun for ages 2 and up

Special Containment Procedures: This book belongs to ___aLFiə_JaCOBs_____.

A Foundation First Readers Book, © 2013 Dr. Wondertainment Press.

Description:

SCP-009-J is missing. Where has it gone?

Is it under the table?

Was it sat upon?

Is it there on the ceiling?

Is it under the rug?

Was it gobbled right up by a quantum pillbug?

Did it run through the tunnel?

Did it fall down the stairs?

Was it sent back in time to a carnival fair?

Did it get on a train to a far-away place?

Is it locked in a falsified beacon from space?

Did it fall in the oobleck and [DATA EXPUNGED]?

If it clogged up the sink, will it have to be plunged?

Just where has SCP-009-J gotten to?

Oh wait, that's right!

SCP-009-J is you!