Santa sent me a message on the first day, asking me details about what I might like. He was kind, gentle, and creative. He explained there wasn't room on his sled to take me around the world, but that he worked extra hard this year for me. Then he said something that really stuck with me... he asked me to please receive all my gifts "without guilt." Who was this Santa, and how did he know me so well?

I've had my gifts sitting on the table for over a week now; staring at them; avoiding them. There was just so many, and it felt impossible to let myself RECEIVE. Santa was gentle in nudging me, making sure I received the multiple packages, and asking whether I was enjoying them yet or not. His main concern was my happiness, while his secondary concern was, "I want to know how I can do better next year!"

I finally wrote him today, and explained my struggle in "receiving," but promised to open them tonight. As hard as it was, a promise is a promise...

I recorded myself opening them, and picked the best stills to describe my experience. As you'll see, by the end, when I opened a small jewelry case, and saw a gold necklace with my real name on it, I fell into tears, and overwhelm. .......overwhelmed with the love from a stranger... overwhelmed with the reminder that there are kind, good people in the world.... overwhelmed with the idea of altruism... overwhelmed by how much "receiving" I was letting in... but I let it in anyways. And you know what? Nothing bad happened. I cried a little, but then I smiled and fulfilled his one request: no guilt.

Thank you, Santa. I am very loved as a daughter, as a sister, and as a friend. To be loved as a stranger, though, is something I needed; something to remind me that in this often heartbreaking world, there are strangers loving other strangers simply BECAUSE. And I'm sorry, but you can't do better than that. So my advice for "how to be better" next year? I have none. You've peaked. Keep being exactly you, and you'll keep the world spinning.

All my love to you, stranger, XOXO