SALINAS, CA—While scheduling a checkup at his primary care provider’s office, local resident Max Holden was reportedly left deeply unsettled Tuesday by the sheer number of available appointment slots on general practitioner Albert Corliss’ calendar. “I asked if I could see Dr. Corliss next week and the receptionist just flat out said, ‘Certainly, when can you come in?’” a visibly disconcerted Holden told reporters, confirming that his unease grew even more intense when he was offered his choice of a morning or afternoon appointment. “When I suggested either Thursday or Friday, she said, ‘Sure, which one?’ I was expecting some pushback, or maybe a list of one or two available openings, but she just left it wide open for me to name a time of day. At that point, I was getting pretty concerned.” Holden added that he’d better be left sitting in the waiting room for at least a half hour at his upcoming appointment, telling reporters that if he is able to just walk in and meet with his doctor immediately, he’ll be “completely freaked out.”

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