Late-night hosts on Thursday addressed potential legislation to ban “bump stocks” in the wake of the mass shooting in Las Vegas, plus congressman Tim Murphy’s scandal and subsequent resignation, and the infighting within the Trump administration.

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“On Capitol Hill, it looks like Congress might finally do something about gun control,” Stephen Colbert began. “Yesterday, congressional Republicans actually signaled that they would be open to banning gun conversion kits called bump stocks, which take advantage of a semi-automatic gun’s natural recoil, allowing it to bounce back and forth off a shooter’s trigger finger and unleash up to 100 rounds in seven seconds.”

“It’s great for hunting, if you have seven seconds to kill every animal in the forest,” Colbert quipped.





“Right now, these devices are totally legal because according to the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, and Firearms, a bump stock is a firearm part and therefore is not regulated as a firearm,” Colbert explained. “It’s not a gun, it’s just part of a gun. Like when your parents find your bong and you tell them, ‘Hey there’s no weed in there now, so technically that is a vape. If you’ll excuse me, I have some Pink Floyd to listen to.’”



Trevor Noah weighed in on the scandal implicating congressman Tim Murphy, a staunch opponent of abortion.

“This has been a particularly rough week so I thought we’d end it off with something lighter, so let’s talk about abortion,” Noah began. “Trust me, whether you’re pro-life or pro-choice, everyone is going to be pro-this story because it’s hilarious.”

“I would like you to meet Tim Murphy,” the host continued. “He’s a Republican congressman from Pennsylvania. Tim Murphy has spent his whole career fighting abortion. He’s part of the pro-life caucus and just this week he co-sponsored a bill to ban all abortions after 20 weeks. Which is why this story is so insane.”



Noah then showed news coverage of the scandal that’s engulfed Murphy; text messages were revealed in which Murphy encourages his lover to get an abortion.

“The same week he puts up an abortion ban, this dude’s timing could not be worse,” Noah said. “Just so you know, Murphy’s mistress wasn’t actually pregnant, it was just a scare, which makes this even funnier. He didn’t even wait a day to confirm it before he abandoned his whole belief system.”



Noah then showed clips of Murphy’s speeches opposing abortion, during one of which he said “there is no more humbling or proud thing to do than save a child’s life.”

Trevor Noah on congressman Tim Murphy’s resignation

“If you’re wondering how on earth could someone say those things about abortion in public and then in private urge his side-chick to have an abortion,” Noah said, “well, his excuse is going to take you for a ride.”



In a text message to his lover, who asked Murphy about his contradictory public and private stances, Murphy replied: “I get what you say about my March for Life messages. I’ve never written them. Staff does them.”

The congressman resigned on Thursday. “It’s such a pity that Tim Murphy terminated his career before it came to term,” Noah concluded.

Finally, Seth Meyers of NBC, having discussed Donald Trump’s awkward visit to Puerto Rico, turned to the tensions between him and his secretary of state, Rex Tillerson.

“The president isn’t content to botch just one crisis, which is why he’s in the process of botching another, North Korea’s nuclear program,” Meyers said. “The international community has been desperately pursuing every diplomatic angle to avoid what would certainly be a catastrophic war. And Trump’s own government has been working with the UN security council, China, and even through back channels of North Korea itself to resolve the conflict peacefully.”

“So once again,” Meyers continued, “Trump threw all that out the window when he tweeted, out of nowhere over the weekend: ‘I told Rex Tillerson, our wonderful Secretary of State, that he is wasting his time trying to negotiate with Little Rocket Man …’”



“So all the careful diplomacy and bargaining and angling just got out the window with one tweet,” Meyers said. “It’s like everyone is playing an intense game of Jenga and Trump is the rambunctious golden retriever barging through the doggy door. So Trump has once again undercut the diplomatic efforts of his secretary of state, which has happened so many times that Tillerson apparently threatened to resign over the summer.”

Meyers then referenced the NBC report that Tillerson, dismayed by Trump’s speech over the summer at the Boy Scout’s jamboree, almost didn’t return to Washington.

“But the fact that Tillerson threatened to resign is not the most damning part of the story,” Meyers said, referring to the report that Tillerson openly called Trump a moron. “Obviously, this story is based on anonymous sources and the state department denied it, which is why MSNBC did their own reporting on exactly what Tillerson said and issued an important clarification later that day.”

Meyers then showed reports that Tillerson actually called his boss a “fucking moron”.

“Tillerson, of course, was forced to issue a statement at a hastily arranged press conference yesterday where he took the extraordinary step of trying to assure the American people that the president is not, in fact a moron,” the host explained. “In fact, cabinet officials are apparently now so concerned about the president’s volatility that several of them have forged an agreement to quit if Trump tries to fire one of them.”

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“Secretary of state Rex Tillerson, defense secretary Jim Mattis, and treasury secretary Steve Mnuchin reportedly forged a suicide pact in which all three members would leave if one of them became a target of the president,” Meyers said of reporting published on Thursday. “So three cabinet officials have to band together to deal with their out-of-control boss. They’re treating him like he’s Dabney Coleman in 9 to 5.”