Brandi Glanville stepped in controversy over the weekend. I think it’s important to point out that Brandi conflates two separate issues and she made an utter hash of it, so I do think that the controversy/backlash was well-deserved. It started out innocently enough, as these things do. Brandi and Eddie Cibrian’s 12-year-old son Mason was about to go on his first date. And instead of simply mentioning that on Twitter, Brandi tweeted: “My eldest has a date tomorrow and I have jitters for him. So I gave him good boyfriend homework.” She tweeted the questionnaire – the worst questionnaire ever, possibly – for her 12-year-old son to ask his date.

My eldest has a date tomorrow and I have jittersfor him so I gave him good boyfriend homework❤️ pic.twitter.com/nHiMTqF0v7 — Brandi Glanville (@BrandiGlanville) October 18, 2015

#6 is what gave people pause. For good reason. There are so many things wrong with a mother telling her 12-year-old son to ask his first date whether or not she’s a virgin. There are so many things wrong with the mother then tweeting it out for mass consumption. When people tweeted “WTF?” at Brandi, she had a meltdown, tweeting “If you think 12 is too young at this point in our age to ask if someone’s a virgin, you’re sadly mistaken. Get with the f–king times… Clearly I’m not saying my kids are having sex but clearly I’m not ignorant to the conversation….Have open conversations with your kids & then you will know what’s going on—that is how I know what I know—don’t f–king for yourselves.”

This is what I’m saying about conflating two different conversations. Sexual education is important. It’s important for parents and kids to be able to feel free to discuss sex, relationships and all of that. But a mother telling her 12-year-old son to ask his date if she’s a virgin seems like the absolutely wrong kind of focus/question (and it has no context on Brandi’s list!), so much so that I’m really offended. The issue of virginity seems like such an outdated subject in a modern conversation between parents and kids about sex. How about a conversation about CONSENT and the importance of consent in all sexual relationships? How about a conversation about respecting your partner? By all means, talk to your kids about all of this and more, and yes, 12-year-olds should be learning about sex too. But to put it out there in the public sphere that your idea of educating your son about sex is telling him to ask his date about her virginity, well… it seems like Brandi was just trolling for attention.