Ian Klymchuk no longer has access to a place to publish his reviews, so I have agreed to post his reviews here on this blog. It's nice to see him reviewing things and places again after all these years.

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Persephone – A lot of skin and muscle

A review by Ian Klymchuk

So Heather and me was sitting on a patio enjoying a cool beverage when who should stroll by but our good friends Ben and Dottie. So we asked ‘em to come on in and enjoy a brew or two with us.

They came into the patio, but Bennie has all them heart and stomach problems, so he had a “fizzy water” – club soda. Dot had a white wine, and we settled into enjoying the weather and the atmosphere.

Then Dottie, bless her blessed soul, says, “We’re going to see at dance show at the Convention Centre. Why don’t you two come along? “

Me: What??? You want ME to go see some dance nonsense??? You gotta be kidding me.

Finally, Heather makes it clear that she wants to go with Ben and Dot to see this show (it’s part of the London Fringe, 2014). It’s called Persephone. I kept calling it PER-seh-phone, but I guess the right way to say it is Per-SEH-fo-knee. What do they know, hunh? So to maintain marital harmony, I go along.

On the way there, I says to Benny, “What are you doing? I can’t stand this stuff, and I know you can’t either!”

Benny says, “Yah, I know. But the Jays played this afternoon, so I didn’t have an excuse. What’s worse, they was shut out.”

So we get to the place where the dance is gonna be. … they call it a “venue”. We can’t go in when we get there. HUH?

We can’t buy a beer. We can’t even buy a friggn white wine, like them artsy types drink. We gotta wait until five minutes before the show starts. Then we can go in. Man, this is gonna be torture.

So we go in, and we make sure our cellphones are turned off. And we’re chattin’ away like we always do before a show.

And then suddenly it hits me that HEY! Those are bodies laying around all over the stage! And they ain’t got much on.! Wow, is that ever cool! I’m sort of excited and I nudge Benny, thinking maybe this will be pretty something, if you know what I mean.

The lights go down and the music starts. The bodies start moving. When there are lots of bodies on stage doing stuff, they actually impress me. There’s something that looks like them famous art prints the way they moved [EE: Ian had seen my book of M.C.Escher prints; I think he was referring to some of those], and even when they wasn’t quite together, I figured they planned that cause they moved together right after that.

I liked the group stuff better than the solo stuff. Maybe that’s because sometimes it reminded me of the CFL cheerleaders, who look real good with all them moves and throwing their hair around. Or maybe it’s because it reminded me of synchronized swimming. I don’t know what it was, but it was pretty nice. And I liked how they used the stage and the front row space for a bunch of the dancing.

And, I gotta admit, the concluding formations was really something. And another good thing? It lasted only about 40 minutes.

Me, I don’t much like watching dancing. But I did like watching all them young dancers who was so fit. And I did like watching all the coordinated moves they made.

But I got two questions.

If it's dancing how come there ain't no waltzing or polkas or two-steps, huh? How come there weren’t no men dancing, huh?

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Ian Klymchuk is president of the Lucan Chapter of the Philistine Liberation Organization. After a nearly two – decade hiatus, he has decided to start writing reviews again. His early reviews can be seen here: http://home.cabletv.on.ca/~econoclast/plo/Klymchuk/klymchuk.html

Unfortunately, neither he nor I have access to that site any longer, so I’ll probably just post his future reviews here on EclectEcon.