My lardmuffin niece is your typical tumblrina 20-something special snowball. She likes to spout the health at excessive size bullshit at family gatherings. We've gotten into it before, many times.

One thing she likes to whale on about is how happy she is with her appearance, despite being 50+ pounds overweight.

So last week, another niece got married. She was a bridesmaid. I did the photos, because we're all cheap as fuck, and I had a plan.

I photoshopped about 20 pounds off of her fat ass in a few photos - a significant amount, but nothing flagrant. Then I posted them on the facebook with the title, "Still working, here's a sneak peak" or some stupid shit.

Dumb bitch took the bait hook, line, and sinker. She fell in love with the photos immediately. Didn't notice my handywork at all. In a matter of a few hours, she had paid herself about a dozen compliments, received roughly two-dozen more from her lardbag friends, and even used one for her profile photo.

I guess she isn't so happy with her fat ass after all.

That was last night. I haven't done anything since then. How can I humiliate this bitch in the most public way possible?

Update: So I told my wife (not fat, but not a shitlord). She is really pissed. She basically told me I was a dick, and I could never tell the fatass niece, ever. She wants me to leave the edited photos as-is, and not edit any more. In other words, cover it up and hope the bitch never notices.

Now typically I would tell the wife to fuck off. She's my wife, not my supervisor. But...

In the last 2hrs, she's called basically everyone at the wedding to tell them about what I did, and ask them not to say anything to the niece.

Now we all know how these big secrets work. They don't. Beanbag ass is going to find out about this eventually. And now, thanks to my wife, she's going to find out that everyone except her knew about it while she was prattling on about how awesome she looked.

Update 2: just found out the bride wants me to edit ALL the photos so tumblrtard doesn't notice the inconsistencies. In other words, the bride is actually telling me to harpoon her bridesmaid. This is just too good... niece is going to lose her shit on everyone when she finds out.