When future historians sift through the kimchi-scented ashes of Brooklyn after the real estate apocalypse, they shall find a few items that stand as obelisks representing our current culture. And amongst the ruins littered with Urban Outfitter hatchets and $24 dirt, they will find The Cool Baby, a booze-filled lifelike doll that stands as the apex of Brooklyn circa 2015.

You can read all about The Cool Baby on its Kickstarter page. Innovator Simon Philion explains the project, for which he is trying to raise $70K for production: "Dress it up to look like you, like someone else, like a part of a costume, like a fan of your team. Use it to get a seat on the subway, strike up a conversation, or mock a biological baby. WHATEVER YOU DO WITH IT, The Cool Baby is a fun, expressive, hands-free beverage insulator for a wide variety of occasions."

Philion, a Williamsburg resident, told Brokelyn that he first came up with the idea in 2013, when he pitched it at his advertising job after a beer company client said they were looking for "an iconic vessel" for their product.

This part really got us though:

The appeal of the Cool Baby, beyond being a hands-free way to drink and not get caught, according to Philion, is that it’s a way to “hack into baby culture…you can walk into the packs of people with strollers and the babies,” and you’ll look just like one of them. Of course, instead of an actual baby in your baby carrier, you’ll be ferrying a “front-mounted drink insulating carbon-based life form” according to the patent on the drink holder.

While there's no doubt that the babies-in-bars question has been a worthy and important national debate for years, maybe it's a little creepy to try to infiltrate packs of new parents just for the satisfaction of spooking the squares?

And while we're at it, maybe it's also a bad sign when you're going out of your way to cover up your alcoholism with a PVC constructed doll that wouldn't even cut it in American Sniper?