WHAT ARE THE TERRIBLE 32S?

The Terrible 32s are a perfectly normal stage in your youngish adult’s development, characterized by cranky self-pity over the discrepancy between the life she has and the one she feels entitled to based on popular-culture narratives and her peers’ achievements, such as those of Laura, who recently landed a big promotion, and maybe it’s worth calling her to see if there’s an opening at her company?

WHEN DO THEY STRIKE?

The Terrible 32s typically commence when your youngish adult receives a “Help Us Celebrate Our New Brownstone!” Paperless Post invitation from Chloë and Josh and Li’l Aidan and Renoir (their Labradoodle), and with her realization that it falls on the same day as her 32nd birthday, which is just as well, since her apartment is too small to invite anyone over, and she kind of hates her friends now, anyway.

SYMPTOMS

Saying “no” to many reasonable suggestions, like how she might receive a job offer if she stopped wearing thrift-store T-shirts and noodling around on the computer and instead put on a nice blouse and looked through the classifieds.

Pivoting from wanting to sell her eggs to suddenly getting scared by those articles about freezing them.