A couple of days ago, Joseph wrote a great post about dealing with difficult people . He’d remind himself, that, as annoying as someone may seem, nonetheless, they’re growing and evolving, and have already come a long way.

They may have come a long way, but there are times when even that knowledge doesn’t make it any easier!

Here are some other ways of looking at people, which have helped me get past some emotion or negative thoughts I’ve been caught up in. These are all true, but it’s often the case that one fits better than the others. (These are from Dharma talks by Daehaeng Kun Sunim)

1. I also used to be just like that.

2. They have a good heart, but when they open their mouth, it comes out all wrong.

3. This person(or event) is my true nature testing me. And helping me discover all the garbage I didn’t realize needed to be dealt with.

4. This is my true nature helping me grow up.

5. If I hadn’t made and sent out this kind of energy, it couldn’t have returned to me like this.

6. All minds and my mind are one mind

pppppIf I repeat this one to myself, it’s like everything inside me settles down and becomes peaceful.

(I’m a bit reluctant to get into commenting on these too much, but every single one of these has helped me get through more than a few difficult situations. )

We are all connected through our Buddha-nature. Through this non-dual foundation, energy and intention are freely going back and forth. Thus, the thoughts I give rise to are felt by others, and if those thoughts are contempt, resentment, or dislike, others will respond accordingly.

If we can resolve the situation harmoniously, that’s the end of it. However, because we are all connected as one, if we leave things unresolved or with resentment and ill-will in the air, those will all come back to us. Again and again. So take care of things harmoniously, even though it may be a bother, or seem unfair (if you saw all the causes involved, you’d probably agree it was perfectly fair!).

As you free the other person, you’ll free yourself as well.