We’ve all been there.

Jogging through a now gentrified neighbourhood – which you helped “settle” by the way – only to be halted by some yuppie poseur who rammed his baby stroller into you.

And now, thanks to a video shot by a bystander that went viral, everyone can feel your pain.

It’s infuriating, right? All you wanted to do was run in a straight line down your (formerly inhospitable) street made less spacious by some construction work, and then an adult baby swears at you because you wanted to beat your fastest segment time on Strava.

This isn’t the neighbourhood you helped cultivate. This isn’t the squalor that you helped cleanse, Omega Man-style. This isn’t the frontier town you civilised through the medium of chai lattes and bikram yoga. And you know what?

You’re not going to take it. Enough is enough.

So in the full view of the community, you take action for them as much for yourself.

“I’ll kill you with one punch,” you say in a throw back to your pioneer days. “You’re messing with the wrong guy. I fight for a living!”

That should put this guy in his place. You follow it up with the classic line, which could have come straight from the mouth of Shooter McGavin: “I fight babies like you … baby”.

One thing yuppie clowns hate is being called babies, unless they thought you were calling them “baby” as in Baby from Dirty Dancing. As things get a little awkward and ambiguous, you decide to clear things up by delivering the coup de grace.

“White privilege! White fucking privilege!” you scream, as if white privilege is some sort of superhero who’ll appear if you yell his name loud enough.

Now, you’re not exactly sure what this phrase means, but it definitely annoys people, so you – a person who isn’t exercising white privilege by acting overtly aggressively in front a police officer or a security guard without having to fear being tasered or shot to death – drop a truth bomb on these newbies.

“You white trash! You fucking white trash!”

Spike Lee’s Do the Right Thing.

You remember Spike Lee’s “rant” about gentrification, about “the motherfuckin’ Christopher Columbus Syndrome”, about people who forget that “You have to come with respect. There’s a code. There’s people.”

Now you’re starting to get what Spike meant. It’s so infuriating to see a place you know and love changed by people who come in and do whatever they want.

You pause for a second to remember that guy whose Air Jordans you scuffed up. I guess it is like Bob Dylan said: “Times they are a’ changin’”.