KaktusKast Hub

Mmmmmmm that sweet branding.

Item #: [DATA EXPUNGED]

Object Class: [DATA EXPUNGED]

Special Containment Procedures: [DATA EXPUNGED]

Description: [DATA EXPUNGED]

Discovery Log: 10/13/2014

In the early morning of October 13th, 2014, an anomalous broadcast was detected originating somewhere in southern Indiana. Further investigation led Mobile Task Force Kappa-8 "Weed Whackers" to an apartment building in [DATA EXPUNGED], where it was discovered that the source of the broadcast was an animate, talking cactus. Foundation personnel have allowed for the flowering desert plant, which refers to itself as D.J. Kaktus, to continue to live at its original point of discovery .

To escape the tedium of this confinement, the cactus has begun to transmit a series of weekly podcasts. The identities of the show's guests are unknown.

Addendum Kakti-3: Collected Recordings

The following recordings have been collected and cataloged in an ongoing effort to further understand the mystery and beauty of can't even leave my computer open around the goddamn cactus the nature of SCP-[DATA EXPUNGED SEXY] FUCKING CHR-

Researcher's Note: I guess most people would be thrilled to get paid like I do to sit and watch a cactus make podcasts all day, but… yeesh. This guy is a clown. - Researcher Fourier

O5 Note: Fine. You can get back to teaching remedial math to the Class-D's like you were before.

Researcher's Note: No O5-senpai pls, I will watch the cactus. - Researcher Fourier McMathNerdington

Newest Episode!

KaktusKast Archive

2014

2015

2016

2017

2018

Overseer's Note: We're going to go ahead and expunge just about everything in this file, because 1.) it's ridiculous, and 2.) we have no idea how to contain this thing, and also it might be an infohazard or something.