Why do the Sixers always have to ruin everything?

First they get our hopes up with a draft and free agency period that actually involved picking good players who aren’t injured or committed to playing overseas. It was just what we’ve wanted for years: A complete rejection of the foul legacy of Sam Hinkie.

But then Markelle Fultz got hurt in Summer League, with an “ankle sprain” that I’m sure will heal properly and not cause any setbacks that might cause Fultz to sit out some or all of training camp, the pre-season, or his entire rookie year. I trust the Sixers’ medical staff. After all, they helped get us to where we are today.

Then the Sixers had the gall to charge fans to sign up for the season ticket waiting list -- if you ask me, after the last four years, season tickets should be free. Just about the Sixers have exciting players and might be better, they think they can charge more for tickets? That’s ridiculous!

Then something even worse happened: LeBron James, it appears, is FRIENDS with Ben Simmons. And based on that... we’re hearing LeBron might sign with the Sixers as a free agent next year.

NO. Absolutely not. Even though I’m usually more on his dad’s side when it comes to the Sixers, I agree with Spike Eskin: I’d rather lose a championship without LeBron than win one with him.

The reasons are simple. LeBron isn’t one of us. He’s not a Philly Guy. He’s not loyal. He’s from Ohio. He doesn’t get our lunchpail mentality. Remember The Decision? All the choking? And besides, when you win a championship with a big free agent, it doesn’t really count. If he wins with us, he'll just move on to the next team.

And don’t you dare compare his chasing a ring with Pete Rose signing with the Phillies in 1979. That was totally different.

And most importantly, there's this:

Why I don't want LeBron on the Sixers: pic.twitter.com/pji7T4G2pQ — FakeWIPCaller (@FakeWIPCaller) July 20, 2017

Luckily, football season is about to start, and at least there’s some good news on that front. Ezekiel Elliott has been getting arrested at an Okafor-like clip. Chris Christie lied about tanning at a closed public beach, showing once again that Cowboys fans can’t be trusted with power. And free agent D’Angelo Williams announced that, because of how terrible their fans are, he would never sign with the Cowboys. Everything about them just screams 3-13.

The Eagles? Eh.

Other Philly sports takes:

I was with Iverson through the practice rants, his feuds with teammates and coaches, his sad alcoholism and throwing his naked wife out of the house. But skipping BIG3, here in Philly? He’s gone too far.

Ben Simmons, though, is the anti-Allen Iverson: He regularly produces highlight-reel excitement in practices, but never plays in games.

This Phillies team badly needs toughness, discipline and splittle-inflected rage. Yes, it needs Larry Bowa.

I’m all for the Phils trading for Giancarlo Stanton and Christian Yelich. Then, all they have to do is trade all their remaining outfielders for Mike Trout.

Joel Embiid needs to stop putting his long-term health at risk with dangerous, risky stunts like standing in the crowd at the Home Run Derby.

A little presumptuous of Carson Wentz, founding a charitable foundation after just one year in the league. You have to EARN that.

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