The years following my drug rehabilitation were not easy. I found myself without friends because when I hung out with the friends that I had then I would wind up back on drugs. I found myself for a little while in need of a different environment which happened to be a Baptist Church.

Looking back through my drug addict years I realized that I knew along that I had a guardian angel looking over me as well as a keen instinct for knowing when to walk away from certain peril. If not for that I’m sure I would have died tragically or wound up in jail a long time ago.

The unrealized dilemma in all of this was not realizing what this instinct was. Guardian angel, that’s easy, you just apply a physical manifestation to a being of which plenty of visual stimuli is already present for and you’ve got it but, applying that criteria to something that is no more than a feeling is a little harder. Words hardly describe it. Vision of it is abstract and hazy. How do you describe knowing without really knowing.

During a sermon one evening at church the preacher nailed it down for me. You see when preaching it’s not enough for anyone to just pick a a verse from the bible preach on it how it applied to the time it was written. In describing the presence of God and that feeling of knowledge of the rights and the wrongs in the human condition the preacher called it “the small still voice.”

It is the instinct. It is the premonition. It is the voice of God in the mind blessing us with wisdom and understanding as well as the sum of that which we grow toward in knowledge.

From that day I found it easier to listen to my heart and know that I didn’t need to understand to follow that voice, I only needed faith and trust in myself to know and to know that feeling is to touch the face of holiness.





Salutation pending

Johnny R Draper



