The Logic Is on Our Side

Let's be honest, Hedgehogs are adorable. That fact is not up for dispute. So shouldn't they have a name that reflects this? The latter half of it's current name is hog. When you think hog what comes to mind? Probably either somebody being grotesque or some large animal like a Warthog. Do either of these things accurately describe this creature? I think not.

Now contrast that with pig. Pigs may also conjure familiar ideas of people being disgusting but I think we can all agree that baby pigs are adorable. As are teacup pigs. Both of which more accurately portray this adorably odd creature that we have come to know and love. Shrubpig is just the obvious answer. What's that? You aren't convinced yet? You say hedge is just as good as shrub, why change the first half? Well my skeptic reader, I was hoping you'd ask.

If you Google image search Hedge and Shrub, you will find stark differences between the two. A hedge, especially in our modern world is largely an artificial creation. Constantly being trimmed and managed, they are molded into an unnatural box shape. Looking in nature, you don't find the hedgehog, let alone any animal in this ridiculous shape. Now a shrub, on the other hand, is normally low to the ground and more spherical in it's shape. Call me crazy, but this aesthetic seems more applicable to our adorable friend. Hedgehog Purists though like to pedal the argument that the Hedge- portion of the name stems from their environment being the aforementioned foliage. But I will contest, that the definition of hedge itself hurts their argument. The definition reads "a fence or boundary formed by closely growing bushes or shrubs." That's right, shrubs. A hedge is made up of shrubs, so would it not be appropriate to rename them Shrubpigs as they too make up part of the hedge in which they dwell. Need you more convincing? Shrubpigs are the future, Hedgehogs are the past.

Also, Sonic the Shrubpig. Alliteration. I rest my case. Please sign this petition.

<3 Shrubpig