One thing that isn’t often spoken about is how hard it is for men to approach women with romantic intent. It’s actually one of the hardest things we ever have to do and that’s the reason why the vast majority of us only ever do it while drunk and specially defined scenarios like a bar or a club. Well I don’t want to be that way anymore and have decided to get over this fear once and for all so to that end I’ll be approaching 2 women every day for 50 days and writing about what happens.

And just so we’re clear; this isn’t about ‘getting laid’; it’s about breaking through my personal limitations and learning to become a much stronger man. When a guy approaches a girl he doesn’t know, every one of his insecurities are shoved right into his face in technicolour HD and it’s in that moment that he really finds out what he’s made of.

It’s time to find out what I’m made of. Let’s do this.

See the whole challenge here.

Day 38 – woman number 1 – Jade

Hello humans. Before I get started let me please say once again that if you’re a secret fan of my blog then I definitely want to know who you are, how you found me, and what you get from following me, so please get in touch @ ciaran@ciarancallam.com.

Yo! Guten tag, konbanwa and wha gwarn, everybody. Welcome back to 100 Women in 50 Days, the blog where I approach 2 random women every day and write about what happens with brutal honesty! The first lady of the day was a black girl who I walked by on Baker St while I was daydreaming about the Patreon video you can see at the bottom of this page. She looked at me and smiled so I smiled back and we both go on with our lives. However; about 20 seconds later, my brain kicked in and I was soon running back to get her attention.

ME: Hey! I noticed that you and I made some eye contact just now, so I thought I’d come flirt with you.

HER: (laughing) Well that’s very nice of you but I’m engaged. But you just looked so happy that I couldn’t I couldn’t help but smile!

ME: Thanks, I guess.

HER: Yeah, most people look miserable all the time, but you had a glow about you. It’s rare and I appreciate that.

ME: And I really appreciate that! I was thinking about a video I’m working on and I guess I got caught up in the moment. But what’s your name, anyway?

HER: I’m Jade, and you?

ME: Ciaran; so when’s the big day, Jade?

HER: We’ve not set a date yet, he literally just proposed a few days ago.

ME: Are you excited?

HER: More than I’ve ever been about anything ever.

ME: Well Jade; I hope you and your husband to be have a brilliant life together.

HER: Thanks! And I hope you have an awesome life too!

ME: Take care.

HER: Bye Ciaran!

After that, I gave Jade a hug and we each bounced as hard and fast as my Afro Caribbean leg muscles would carry us.

Woman number 2 – Leigh

I met Leigh as I was traipsing the streets of St John’s Wood headed to my Airbnb flat. I was looking down at my phone and scrolling through YouTube videos when I looked up and saw her walking past me. Just as with Jade earlier we both smiled at each other as we walked by, but this time I was much faster off the mark. Call me Quick Draw McGraw.

I walked up, told her I thought she looked amazing and she laughed, smiled and thanked me for the compliment. She was an American who was in London for a few days on business and apparently worked as an international bee conservationist. She was late for an appointment so we walked and talked and made plans to meet for a drink at some point before she leaves the country.

She said that people in London seem to be quite unapproachable and my speaking to her was what she needed. What was interesting is that she said the same thing that Jade said about my having a good energy that she felt drawn to. I guess I must be in an extremely good mood today and radiating positive vibes.

Anyway; she had a million and one questions about me and the work I do, and I was curious as to why the hell someone would want to work with bees. I remember being stung by one at the age of 5 and the thought of that searing pain has never left my psyche so I generally try to stay as far away from the little buggers as possible. But having said that, when she spoke about her work her passion rang through and I was ultimately won over.

Thoughts

I seriously must have been sending out some special energy today; and it’s a shame I’m not like that 24-7. It’d be really awesome if I could do ctrl A to select today’s mental state, then ctrl C to copy it to clipboard and then keep it saved to do a ctrl V and paste it onto my brain whenever I need it in future. But alas; we don’t yet have the technology for such things!

38 days down, 12 to go