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lovethatdiscourse:

dontcallmequeer: trans men who talk about “female socialisation” have blood on their hands And they actually benefit from using this language, to the detriment of trans women. For trans men, talking about “female socialization” is optional. They have full agency over that part of themselves. If they want to enter female spaces, silence women, or exploit transmisogyny, all they have to do is shout ~but female socialization~ and at most, twefs regard them with annoyance. But this always presumes the opposite statement “trans women are male socialized” to be true. An idea which is systemically supported through violence against trans women. There’s nothing radical about it, and women have no agency over it. A trans man will always have the agency to choose to talk about socialization on his terms. A trans woman will be forced to discuss it by people who want her dead on terms they dictate to be as abusive and violent as possible. And often those people are trans men themselves.

i just want everyone to read this post and then read it again. if there is any doubt that the trans community is letting down trans men (and all dysphoric dfab people, to a lesser degree) on a massive scale, this person explains flawlessly how and why they do so. there’s no awareness here – or perhaps it’s deliberately covered up – that trans men and non-trans afabs connect over their shared socialziation and how it impacts them, and the injustices that have been committed against them that they will eventually have to come to terms with.

according to this person, this doesn’t benefit trans men on a personal level, it’s only a way to manipulate trans women. trans women are centred here, in this post about female socialization, and yet this comes from a community where trans men supposedly always talk over trans women. and notice the cult speak: talking about male socialization is now violent and is only done by people who want trans women to be killed. a trans man who so much as acknowledges his own socialization, his actual lived experiences, is actually somehow encouraging the death of trans women.

this is not in any way about the safety of trans women or blood on anyone’s hands. it’s about trans women having bruised egos because they were male socialized, and therefore dfabs have this experience of womanhood that they never will, whether they want it or not, and the only way they can cope with that is attempting to shut this down with this sort of gaslighting and guilt-tripping, which is especially effective against trans men and other dfabs because we are socialized to internalize the idea that we are to blame for everything that goes wrong for other people. but talking about your own lived experiences doesn’t contribute to the death of anyone. this is a manipulation tactic worthy of a cult.