Helix expresses love. But not the kind Red is happy with.

Enjoy.

–





Three o’clock again. Soon.





Waiting was easier this time, but not by much. It was of course calming to know that He’d already returned once the day prior, yet Red just couldn’t quite shake his concern.





He slowly sat on the couch’s end, anticipating the front door to open at any second.

Any second…





There.

Finally.

Red couldn’t help smiling.

“We’re home,” Fonz sighed, clasping the ball of scarves in one hand and closing the door with the other. He sounded tired.

Well, what was he waiting for? He should be getting the scarves off Him. Perhaps he was in need of a reminder.

“The scarves, Fonz…” Red mumbled somewhat intimidatingly, still grinning.

“Yeah, yeah,” Fonz grumbled, and began removing the fabric. In a few moments, He had been freed again. But He seemed… different.

“Ahhhh…” the omanyte sighed, face resting on one of His tentacles, sounding nigh entranced.

“…I-Is He okay?” Red hurriedly whispered to Fonz, shifting his expression. “Is He sick? Why’s He like that?”

“Oh, He’s sick, alright,” Fonz grumbled, placing Helix on the kitchen table, which a basket of berries adorned - just like yesterday, though the basket wasn’t as full. A god or not, rationing was important. Red knew that.

“Lovesick,” Fonz specified.

“What do you mean?” Red demanded. Now was not the time for riddles…

“You should ask Him. He’d be glad to tell you,” Fonz muttered. “A whole lot…”

Red gave Fonz a menacing glance, but then he turned to Helix, switching back to his cheery expression.

“How was Your day, my lord?” Red sweetly asked.

“Oh! Oh! Red! You need to hear this!” Helix gushed. “The best thing just happened to me today!”

“Oh, what was it?”

“I met…” He paused to sigh again, ”the most wonderful girl…”

“…Oh, is that so?” Red asked, grasping the edge of the table a little harder.

“Yeah! We were walking home, and I heard this amazing singing, and I asked Fonz to let me see, and he did, and I saw…” Again, He sighed. “Her…”

Who, Red thought. Who was this wench who thought she could be good enough for-

“Anyway, her name was ShirLee - with a capital L and two E’s - and she was this rising pop star kind of girl, and like, there were all these fans of hers there, throwing roses and whatever, but like, I’m sure that I would be the one for her, I would treat her so right, like, those other guys wouldn’t even understand…”

He kept talking. It was unbelievable. Red couldn’t remember the last time He’d talked for so long, and so… disgustingly sappily…

“…and you know, you know, I listened to all her songs, I mean, I haven’t heard any song beside the one I saw her perform, but I’m going to and I’m sure I’ll like them just as much, and she’s just such a great performer, and so, so beautiful and charming and wonderful and beautiful and great, you know?”

“I… sure,” Red said, trying his best not to tighten his grip of the table any further in fear of breaking it entirely.

“Ahh… she truly is wonderful,” Helix whispered, and then fell silent.

“…Well, anyway, my lord,” Red began, “Your food is waiting for You. You can get it whenever You… feel like it…”

Helix didn’t look like He was listening. Red decided it was best for him to just leave.

“…S-See you later.”

Red and Fonz exchanged a look. Then Red retreated into the living room.





ShirLee. Who was she? And what was she? A human or a mon? Red had to know. And he knew just who to ask.

Red promptly walked up the stairs, walked to the end of the hallway and knocked on a door.

“Go away,” answered Abba’s voice.

Red opened the door anyway. Knocking had never been about requesting permission to enter. He only ever did it to be polite.

“Ugh, what the hell do you want? I’m kind of in the middle of something,” Abba groaned, removing his headphones.

“I need you to take me to the Internet,” Red said.

Abba snorted. “Like actually?”

“Yes. I need to find out information about a certain ‘Shir-Lee’. Have you heard of her?”

“Have I heard of ShirLee?” Abba sneered. “What, were you born literally yesterday? Everyone knows that cringestain. Her fans are so plague.”

“What?”

“Oh, right,” Abba scoffed. “I forgot you were a normie.”

Red? Normal? That was a first.

“Anyway, she’s, like, this new pop sensation,” Abba explained. “Honestly, her music sucks ass, but if you ever say that out loud, you get disliked to hell.”

“What species is she?”

Abba smirked. “You know, I’ve always liked how un-PC you can be.”

“Yes, I hate PCs.”

“No, Red, that’s not… Oh, never mind.”

“I think I recall asking you a question, Abba,” Red muttered.

“She’s an inkay. One of those Unovan mon. And since she’s a female non-humanoid coldblood celebrity, you literally cannot say anything bad about her or else you’re a speci-”

“Show me,” Red interrupted.

An inkay, huh? Would make sense for an omanyte to fall for one, then…

Abba sighed, then turned to his screen. With just a few clicks and some typing, he was able to find dozens of images of the mon in question. Technology sure was something. Something Red would keep avoiding nevertheless, but still.

“There,” Abba said and moved his chair further away so that Red could see better.

She wasn’t a bad-looking mon. Her skin was a healthy shade of blue, white and pink, and her light organs seemed to be working excellently. Still, she looked a whole lot more natural than the purebreds Red had seen breeders own.

“You done ogling the squid?” Abba asked.

“Why is she here?” Red asked.

“She’s on a Kanto tour. She’ll be performing in Viridian two days from now. Right now, she’s staying at Celadon Hotel, room 331.”

“How do you know all that?”

“It’s all on her Chatter. She’s kind of an oversharer.”

Red could have asked what Chatter was, but realised at the last moment that he actually didn’t care at all.

“Thank you, Abba, that would be enough,” Red said, walking back to the door.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just get out of my face already,” Abba mumbled, putting his headphones back on.





Red returned to the ground floor. He saw Helix on the couch, and promptly dashed nearer.

“Is there anything you need, my lord?” he swiftly asked.

“Nah, nah…. I’m fine…” Helix mumbled, resting on His tentacle again.

Red grabbed his arms and stepped closer. “You know,” he began, “it’s still a bit… chilly here, don’t you think?”

It was a lie, but surely a white one.

“I dunno, maybe…”

“Would you like me to… warm you, my lord?” Red tried.

“No need,” Helix said, lazily raising a tentacle. “Thoughts about… her are enough to keep me warm… Ahh.”

“A-are you sure?” Red asked, attempting to mask his desperation as best as he could.

“Yes, yes,” Helix said, “you may go now.”

Red looked at Fonz, who was reading one of his magazines in the armchair. Fonz looked back and subtly shrugged.

Slowly, Red walked off.





Red stared into the darkness above. Sleep wouldn’t come. He’d lain there for minutes upon minutes, but he just couldn’t let it go.

It wasn’t right. None of this was right. It wasn’t supposed to be this way.

Had he done something wrong? He’d always respected His wishes. Was this punishment for something? Why would this happen?

What could he do?

Nothing…

…now.

But, tomorrow. Tomorrow, he would fix this.

And everything would go back to just the way it was before.

