Following up it's "Monotune" commercial, Google is back on another awards show with another new ad for Android. Called "Rock, Paper, Scissors," it has the three historical enemies learning to make friends with each other. It's a story of three soon-to-be friends overcoming school bullying, and it's fine so far as it goes. But trust me when I say that trying to map this metaphor too closely to the battle for marketshare between Samsung, Sony, LG, and all the rest is going to send you in deeply nerdy and ultimately unfulfilling circles. If Paper is LG, are we watching the G5 mock the G4 only to be saved by Scissors, aka the Samsung Galaxy S7? Seriously — let the metaphor go.

Honestly the best part of the ad is that is unapologetically brings back the rock anthem St. Elmo's Fire (Man in Motion) by John Parr. You can watch the Android commercial above, sure, but wouldn't you be even happier watching the video below? If you're going to for earnest feelings based on high school drama, go to the Brat Pack source. Why watch school supplies learn life lessons when you could have the real thing: Rob Lowe with the best mullet ever?