Warning: The contents of this column are likely to be deemed offensive by radical feminists and the emotionally handicapped. Please pardon the redundancy.

Some conservatives fail to grasp the importance of the campus culture wars. They write to me asking why I don’t cover issues of national importance instead of battling endlessly with college administrators. Their criticisms fall on deaf ears because I understand something they don’t: That the insanity we see on the campus today will threaten our fundamental freedoms when it becomes normalized and bleeds into the broader culture.

Clearly, there is no greater threat to freedom today than the ever-broadening definitions of sexual harassment and hate speech. By giving students the authority to define any speech they don’t like as harassment and any behavior they don’t like as “threatening” we are creating a campus environment that even Jesse Pinkman would correctly recognize as Kafkaesque. Combine it with a campus due process model based upon the Star Chamber and you have a recipe for disaster.

Our campus climate for free speech hit an all time low just last week after I called for the firing of an administrator that had conspired to deprive students of their basic constitutional rights. In the wake of my public criticism of her she was investigated and has now resigned. I don’t often talk about my feelings but I feel vindicated. (I also feel like smoking a fat Cuban. But I don’t want campus leftists to think I’m threatening to kill Fidel Castro).

While the investigation of the administrator was ongoing her student defenders went on the offensive. Several of these radical feminists downloaded some of my columns from TownHall.com and started following my personal Facebook page. Unsurprisingly, they were offended by my constitutionally protected speech. So the feminists did what feminists do. They called government school officials and asked them to punish my private speech. More specifically, they asked the administration if they could accuse me of sexual harassment.

University officials met with forty offended feminists at the LGBTQIA Office. (Who said all feminists are lesbians?). At the meeting, the administrators explained that the First Amendment protects my speech. They don’t really believe that. But last year they got sued for trying to punish the same speech. So, in that sense, the verdict served as a prophylactic, which prevented campus feminists from perpetrating a gang rape on the First Amendment.

But, of course, the feminists weren’t happy. (Who said all feminists are angry lesbians?). So the feminists strapped on their combat boots and marched down to the local media. Fortunately for them, the local reporter was a young woman not long out of college. So the story received top billing on the evening news.

The coverage was predictably bad. Political correctness doesn’t just produce bad students. Eventually they graduate and become bad news reporters. Fortunately, though, the community did learn something from the local news story: That campus feminists are becoming so deranged that they now stalk strangers on Facebook in order to become victims of “harassment.”

As this semester winds down, I hope that I have provided a valuable public service to my readers, even those who fail to appreciate the long-term consequences of the campus culture wars. You already knew that campus feminists had a propensity for dressing provocatively and talking about their vaginas. Now, readers of my column also know the following about campus feminists (consult my column archive to refresh your memory):

-They threatened their political opponents with formal charges in the campus judiciary for the “crime” of inviting them to a debate.

-They form human shields around their political opponents in order to prevent the dissemination of core political speech protected by the First Amendment.

-They follow strangers on Facebook in the hopes of becoming “harassed.”

-They go to the media saying they have been threatened by people they have never met or spoken to (and whose only danger to society is that they end sentences with prepositions, not propositions).

Now, potential employers know what to do when they see that a job applicant majored in Women’s Studies or was in a campus feminist organization in college. It speaks volumes about their potential to coexist in the workplace and contribute to our economy. Clearly, these women are suited for only one line of work.

Thank you for your order. Drive through.