tWEEEEENTYYYYY EIGHTEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN

It's the New Year. Great. And it has been for a week, so how about we kick of 2018 a bit late with a quality shitpost?

What better topic than the lovely one of death. Yes, let's start 2018 with the Carolean Death March. What is the CDM? Kiddo, that's what this post is about.

Before we start though, this is a direct follow up from another post. This would be mine on the Siege of Fredriksten, which I would recommend reading before this if you haven't already.

Ok let me talk about some death and shit now.

Edit: thanks for the feature

wait a second why the fuck do i have so many pictures of this.

BACKGROUND

The Swedish Army lost the Siege of Fredriksten, which had claimed the life of king Charles XII (Carolus Rex). The Swedes began their retreat back to the fatherland after this fiasco under the lead of Lieutenant- General Carl Gustav Armfeldt. Armfeldt believed the fastest way back to Sweden would be through the Tydal Mountain Range in Trøndelag, Norway.

THE TRIP

On January 8th, the Swedish began their march from Haltdalen to Tydal. This was about 30 Kilometers, but if you're an American simpleton like me it's approximately 18.64 miles. The cold weather already claimed the lives of 200 poor Swedes just on this march alone. On the 11th, they gathered on the Ås and Østby farms in Tydal with about 5,800 men. 14 Skiers were sent over the mountains to Jämland, this was so they could prepare for the army's arrival in good ol' father Sweden.

They departed from Østby on January 12th (New Years Day on the Swedish Calendar) with a Norwegian guide named Lars Bersvendsen Østby. He was persuading into aiding the Caroleans when two of his kinswomen were held hostage. Despite the cold weather, there was no snowfall. If the weather wasn't going to fuck up, they could've been in Jämland in two days.

However, it's never that easy for the meme that is the Swedish Empire. In the afternoon, a terrible blizzard struck in the mountains. The visibility was poor and it was really goddamn cold, so Carl number 23478 (Armfeldt) set up a camp on Øyfjellet mountain by lake Essand. The Swedes were desperate to keep warm amd not fucking die, so they set a lot of their supplies on fire. However, the effects were minimal and 200 men died and became Swedesicles and died that night.

The storm didn't even stop the second day, so now the Swedes were spread out on the mounatin like madmen. The main force reached Sweden's border and set up camp at Enaävlen. The weather took some of their horses and their equipment was lost in the Tydals. On the 15th and 16th , Armfeldt and his men reached Handöl.

Despite this, 3,000 men were still in the Tydal range, all of which freezing to death. They made their way to Duved, but 700 men also died on that way down. 600 of the 2,100 men would be crippled for the rest of their natural born lives.

Dammit I hate it when my plans in Norwegian mountain ranges go to shit.

AFTERMATH

On January 18th, Norwegian major Emahusen decided "Imma follow the swedes' path lol."

So he went up in the Tydals and found hundreds of dead Swedish men and riderless horses. So they looted those mountains like how I loot bandits in Skyrim. They took the weapons and cannons while the townspeople plundered boots and shirts and shit.

Wolves, Wolverines, and foxes were also in that mountain! So then they...

I think you can figure out what happens next.

In Brekka Bygdetun, Tydal they hold an open air play called the Karolinerspelet. This performance held every other year and it is a retelling of the catastrophe.

In Duved, they have a monument called the Karolinermonumentet in remembrance of the Death March. For everyone who can't figure it out, "Karoliner" is the Swedish word for Caroleans.

THE FALL OF THE SWEDISH EMPIRE

With no king, Charles's sister Ulrika Eleonora took up the Swedish throne. The Swedes were incapable of keeping their territories with an army on life support, so they lost all their land except for Finland. They would try fighting until 1721, which cost them the Stormakstiden and they lost the Great Northern War.

Yes because this face is what should be on the Swedish throne:

AgE Of LiBeRtY hURRRRRRRRR

CONCLUSION

dammit i hate blizzards.

In conclusion, the Carolean Death March was a tragedy and hot mess. Quite frankly it's pretty depressing and I can't bring myself to make a meme about it. So thus, allow me to let Sabaton finish a post once again.

This song is Ruina Imperii, and it's about the Death March and fall of the empire. Yes, there is no English version so have some subtitles.

Sabaton - Ruina Imperii (Lyrics Svenska & English)

edit:

Almost forgot that no pictures here belong to me

And please do not hesitate to correct my mistakes

Also if you saw my profile picture, you're probably confused. To be honest, I am too. It's from a painting on the Battle of Narva.

Was Carolus Rex the original thrift shop guy??? 🤔🤔🤔