Brrr. Look at those eyes. Look at the mouth, just slightly open, ready to throw a choice insult your way, sizzling through the air like a hot streak of angry lightning. You really are an idiot sandwich.

Ahem, now we got that out our system, let’s look at Wellington’s stats. He’s actually quite fast at 6”/8” MOV, with good defensive stats at 4+/1 DEF/ARM. He’s also not awful at kicking the ball around, but he’s distinctly not a striker by any stretch of the word. His playbook is actually pretty varied, and scales well when you bear his Intimidation Guild Rule in mind. He absolutely does like sticking the knives in, but he also rather likes shouting at all the other incompetents to do it for him. Getting into his character plays, Singled Out momentously on column 2 reflects his ability to isolate one enemy model and make them feel utterly useless, leaving them very vulnerable for the rest of the team to come in and beat the everloving tar out of them. That push/dodge on column 3 is actually pretty achievable, and gives him a solid disengagement option if he wants it.

We’ve already covered Singled Out, which is pretty simple. It turns out giving extra dice to a guild that lowers the opponent’s defence is pretty good? Who knew! His next character play is also very simple (most of the Cook’s abilities are, if we’re honest. They’re not overly subtle). Chef’s Special targets a friendly model, and while friendly models are within 2” of that model, they gain +1 DMG to playbook damage results. Oh my! What a beast. Do note that this includes the model Chef’s Special targets, since of course that model is within 2” of itself. Wellington can use this ability on himself, of course, but if he can’t quite get into position to make the most use of it, he has the option to put this on another friendly model and have them use it as a mobile damage buff.

Right off the bat then, we can see that Wellington is a focal point for his team. He can hand out extra dice and extra damage for friendly models. He’s also pretty handy at chucking out damage himself if he gets close to the action, but he also ‘encourages’ (shouts at) his team effectively too!

Finally he has 15 HP, a touch below what we’d expect to see on a captain, since the Cooks are very much a glass cannon style guild.

I Wouldn’t Trust You To Run A Bath,

Never Mind An Effing Guild Ball Team