M.C. HAMMER BLEW ALL HIS MONEY

If you were looking for a perfect example of what not to do after striking it rich, look no further than M.C. Hammer. When 1990’s mega hit "U Can’t Touch This" came out, he was an instant success, and he quickly celebrated his fortune by spending tons of cash on lavish mansions, 17 car garages, and backyard baseball diamonds. It also stands to reason that, if you buy a mansion with a 17 car garage, you probably have enough dough to fill it with pricey vehicles.

These expenditures have been estimated to cost up to $30 million, and the rapper only made around $33 million the year the record came out.

Now, I wasn’t sure about Kesha’s discography but I’m fairly certain that M.C. Hammer never released a comeback album, so it’s safe to say he budgeted pretty poorly for the future. He was so famously broke in the aftermath of all this spending that other rappers actually began to mock him. Jay-Z poked fun at the unfortunate financial situation of his counterpart in his song So appalled, referencing the fact that, unlike Hammer, he could spend more than $30 million. I just hope those golden pants weren’t made of real gold, because that’s probably another $2 million right there.











KIM KARDASHIAN IS MATERIALISTIC

Well, obviously Kim K was going to make an appearance on this list. The most famous of the now extraordinary trendy Kardashian clan, she wouldn’t really be in the headlines every two seconds were she not as liberal with her bank account as she is. Plus, she’s married to Grammy-winning, multi-platinum recording artist Kanye West, so I’m sure they aren’t worried about encountering financial hardship anytime soon. In fact, I would wager that she recoups her losses on each expenditure via the press attention alone. That’s probably somewhat of an exaggeration, but only slightly. Despite Kanye’s famous claim of being million-dollar debtor, Kim has spent hundreds of thousands of dollars on absolutely frivolous items;

she’s spent upwards of $100,000 in one Hermes shopping trip, bought a $10,000 ring on a complete whim, and dropped six figures renting out Los Angeles’ Staples Center so her husband could play a game of basketball with some of his friends.

I guess the community court down the street just wouldn’t cut it. Again, Kim K is a cultural icon the likes of which are only seen a couple of times a decade, and I don’t mean to totally lambast her lifestyle. Plenty of celebs spend wildly, and accusing her of overdoing it feels like accusing the late comedian Joan Rivers of undergoing too many plastic surgery procedures.







HEIDI MONTAG IS READY

I’m not saying that the stars of MTV’s celeb-centric series The Hills aren’t intelligent, but it seems that, whenever I hear about them in the news, it’s because they’ve done something a bit half-witted. An oft-disliked and ridiculed 2006 to 2010 reality TV vehicle, it was a veritable who's-who of waning-in-popularity, famous-for-being-famous types. Had the Kardashian clan only been a feature, The Hills would have been gossipy celeb mecca. To each their own, though, and, if you held any particular affinity toward the show, I wouldn’t hold it against you; I would at least place The Hills a notch or two above the televised atrocities featured on Jersey Shore.

Though the show had been over for about two years at the time, Heidi Montag managed to make waves in the closing days of 2012 when she and her husband Spencer Pratt managed to blow $10 million on the "upcoming" apocalypse. Should the world have ended, I suppose they would have been adequately prepared. However, as anyone who's ever played Fallout will tell you, all you really need is a hefty stack of bottle caps. Well, that, and maybe a sturdy suit of power armor. Heidi Montag in Fallout power armor — that’s kind of a scary thought.



KANYE WEST SPENDS MONEY ON EVERYONE

I’ve made mention of Kanye’s debt already, but it isn’t a good sign when one of your most prominent moments of the past few years was announcing to the world that you’re not nearly as well-off as you seemed to be. He’s won music awards, had multiple records go platinum, and interrupted Taylor Swift’s music video award, but even that couldn’t save him from the poorhouse, apparently.

It seems that most of his spending stems from his wife on whom he’s imparted countless fancy, expensive gifts. I suppose he wants Kim to look good, given that he once threw out everything in her wardrobe of which he didn’t personally approve. You’d think it would take quite a while to blow through the kind of cash he must have had, but, when you’re married to a Kardashian, I suppose it isn’t as difficult as it would seem.

In fact, Kim’s wedding ring is said to cost somewhere around $3 million, which is indicative of the kind of money he spends on his better half. He’s also known to have purchased a golden skull for $34,000 as a gift to fellow rapper and close confidant Jay-Z.

I don’t intend to judge Kanye too harshly—he’s entitled to spend his earnings however he sees fit, but I guess he should have seen his millions of debt coming well before the debt collectors showed up at his door.







ALLEN IVERSON SPENT MORE THAN WHAT HE MADE

Iverson will always primarily be remembered for his skills as a basketball player, and, in my mind, he’s only one or two notches below greats like Michael Jordan or Lebron James. Nicknamed “The Answer,” he may have been as much on the court, but these days he likely wishes he could find an answer for his financial qualms. He’s famous for talking a big game and living large, but his lifestyle and attitude quickly caught up with him, and it wasn’t long before his NBA earnings dwindled to nothing. Iverson has stated that, though he was making $20 million per season at one point, he was spending it nearly as quickly as he made it.

He’s said that he would bring in about $60,000 a month, yet he’d have to shell out somewhere around $360,000 monthly to keep up with his debts.