Perhaps one of the biggest misconceptions I encounter when reporting on the sexist sayings that pervade little girl’s clothing is that a glittery t-shirt that reads “princess” or “a little bit dramatic” or “nothing tastes as good as skinny feels” or a thong that reads “I love rich boys” will set girls down a path of rampant “sluttiness.” That all it takes is a few rhinestones dotting a crown and your little girl will just start chasing after every boy who show her interest. While some of these garment no doubt sexualize girls, calling them “sluts in the making” when they choose these garments doesn’t exactly help matters.

I personally don’t use the “slut” for a multitude reasons. Even in the wake of powerful movements like SlutWalk, it’s still I word I don’t like to hear given how long the term has been steeping in vehement anti-woman sentiments and rhetoric. I commend the women and men who are looking to reclaim the word, especially younger women who are being playful with the double standard that the word imposes. And given how even young girls use the term casually in exchanges with friends, it’s obvious that the term is not always very potent given a certain context.

But at its historical core, “slut” is an ugly word specifically designed to denigrate women by reducing them to their sexuality — which happens even today. That’s why teenage girls like Emma Sullivan, who tweeted her distaste for Gov. Brownback, gets called a “whore” for expressing her opinion and Elizabeth Warren, one of the most respected women in US poltics, gets called a “socialist whore” by people who disagree with her. And yet, many feel compelled to use this derogatory term freely when it comes to really young girls, conveying to them at a young age that a “slut” is a real life to be avoided, a real persona that they can inhabit if they’re not careful. Girls who are merely looking to be cool, be accepted, and follow emerging yet sexist trends, are often quick to evoke the word in adults based merely on their wardrobe choices — which is even more disappointing.

Giving girls clothing that reinforces the 24/7 media message that their appearance is what matters most does discourage other pursuits, like shirts that claim that they can’t do math and can be pretty like their mother while their brother can be smart like daddy. Whether you do or do not believe that getting girls preoccupied with their sex appeal and beauty is conducive to a fulfilling life is up for personal debate. But telling them that they’re “little sluts” for picking out a shirt that proclaims their love of makeup is just as problematic. And villifying the girls who do make those wardrobe choices as “sluts” erects a clear stigma that ultimately hurts girls down the road by making that kind of sexually-charged hatred for other women not only acceptable, but all the more real for their own futures.

Our girls and daughters need more than scare tactics about how shirts will turn them into mythical “sluts” if they’re not careful. And while we should be discouraging the sexism that dominates most of their commercial wardrobe, we should also be mindful of how we communicate this distaste to the little ones watching.

(photo: episodesandreels.com)