I’ll be honest.

These things are getting less and less fun to write by the week.

Why??

Well how about I let the fans tell remind you:

Don't feel like talking about Everton today - probably won't feel like talking about Everton tomorrow either.

Well done Everton - you've numbed me. #Everton @Everton pic.twitter.com/9ONDpTxNyG — LoveEvertonForum (@LuvEvertonForum) February 7, 2018

Everton's away record v current top six since Feb 2011:

Played 43

Won 1

Drawn 14

Lost 28

Scored 28

Conceded 82

Points 17/129#efc #everton #arseve — Jonny Blain (@jonoblain) February 2, 2018

Put another way:

By the way, here's Everton's record against the top six over the last seven seasons. Plumbing Grand Canyon depths this year. #EFC pic.twitter.com/B7kqP2pWOq — Royal Blue Mersey (@RBMersey) February 3, 2018

Wait!!!

THERE IS A SILVER LINING TO THE AWFULNESS THAT IS EVERTON!

Trudging out of the Emirates with his chin on the floor, the little fella spots this baby lying in a puddle. Big thanks to #Everton for such a witless display - If he'd had his head held high, he'd have walked straight past it. Your incompetence has made his day. #cheers pic.twitter.com/chy1nIi3WX — Rags (@r4gsy) February 4, 2018

See....

Now that we are all in a good mood, let’s get to your questions!

Is it bad to hope the team doesn’t do well (not being relegated, obviously) just to make sure Sam and Walsh aren’t here next year?? — jon hein (@jdhein13) February 7, 2018

I’m willing you bet you aren’t the only person who is having that EXACT thought right now.

In fact, let’s take a quick vote.

Who feels the same way:

Come on now.....

That’s better.

Nope, you are certainly NOT alone in your wishes to balance non-relegation with being bad enough to get Big Sam canned.

In fact, anyone who DOESN’T have this mindset is from another planet or a member of the Allardyce family.

You know what, strike that last qualifier. I imagine even Big Sam’s closest relatives can’t stand to watch the disheveled mess the Toffees currently are. They probably long for the days when Sam Allardyce was taking bribes and kickbacks under the table.

They would say something like:

‘If you’re not cheating, you’re not trying!’

In that case Big Sam MUST be trying his hardest.

Because I don’t know about you, but I certainly feel cheated. You just know that if Big Sam was involved in the other football then he’d be part of the New England Patriots organization.

As for Steve Walsh, his removal may prove to be more of a difficult situation.

His appointment as Director of Football almost two years ago was one of new owner Farhad Moshiri’s efforts to revitalize the Toffees on the pitch.

The subsequent appoint of Ronald Koeman gave Moshiri the two-headed monster he so desired:

Walsh to recruit them, Koeman to manage them.

Of course Koeman was let go a few weeks into this season and the Toffees have endured a dreadful season.

If Moshiri were to let go of Walsh now it would be an admission of guilt that he got it doubly wrong and would have a feeling of ‘going back to the beginning’ about it.

However, what Moshiri HOPEFULLY understands is that while he has not felt the wrath of Toffees fans because his exhaustive financial efforts have set up the Toffees for the long-term, his failure to remove Walsh would show a stubbornness that would raise red flags.

Fans can deal with the new guy getting it wrong, but they CAN’T deal with him not being able to admit it.

Should Moshiri fail to act decisively as soon as (or even before) the end of the season, Everton fans may turn their anger all the way to the top and officially erode ANY good feelings between the front office and the fans.

Is tuson going to get a game this season? — Toffees!!! (@steefc1984) February 7, 2018

Dear Everton,

.. and prove me right.

Cenk Tosun has shown nothing but hustle and hard work since he has arrived on the scene at Goodison.

After spending upwards of £27 million on the Turkish striker, it was assumed that he would have a run of games to settle into the squad and prove his worth.

After getting over 60 minutes each against Tottenham Hotspur and West Bromwich Albion (both losses), Tosun has since been sequestered on the bench minus a late cameo in Arsenal’s 5-1 thrashing of Everton this past weekend.

Big Sam has said that Tosun has needed time to adjust before he can start regularly (an argument undermined by his immediate insertion into the lineup), and that the English game has overwhelmed him.

Unfortunately for Sam, if this were the only metric to determine a player’s ability to start the hapless Toffees would be incapable of fielding a squad having been beaten soundly all season long.

So either Allardyce has a player who isn’t ready for the league and Walsh and Co. are to blame, or Allardyce is actively undermining the squad by benching a player who is obviously superior to the competition at his position.

Either way, the entire mess is just another symptom of a club that is incapable of executing a simple strategy.

I for one hope Tosun gets a handful of starts, and a few goals, before the end of the season so that when the next manager comes in the talented striker’s confidence hasn’t been completely eroded.

As always Everton..

Walter Smith sacked by Everton gets the Scotland job

Roberto Martinez sacked by Everton gets the Belgium Job

Ronald koeman sacked by Everton gets the Holland Job



Sam Allardyce sacked by England....gets the Everton job.. #Everton #banter — Mr.Bump (@bigglezuk) February 7, 2018

if Allardyce isn’t the manager for us, who is? The next appointment has to be right going forward. Allardyce can’t stay at the helm surely to god! — Trevor P Malcolmson (@trevor_p_malco) February 7, 2018

I am going to continue to answer some version of this question in each mailbag, so I went ahead and made a graphic for my top two candidates (awkward pictures just because):

Both men have both built squads as well as taken over dominant teams and done well.

They give youth a chance and their players seem to like them for the most part.

Hopefully Farhad will take this into consideration when he reads the Toffees Mailbag.

TOFFEE TUNES

Need Your Light

Ra Ra Riot

This is an absolutely energizing album.

Depressed about the Toffees?

OF COURSE YOU ARE!

Check out this album and I assure you that you will be on your feet dancing in no time!

You will still be crying....

BUT AT LEAST YOU’LL BE DANCING!

FAVORITE TRACK: WATER