EPISODE NUMBER: 8078 (April 2, 2012)

GUESTS: Gary Johnson

SEGMENTS: Intro – 4/2/12 | Colbert Super PAC – Super Fun Pack Treasure Hunt | The Beefstate Governors | Yahweh or No Way – Christian Card Counters, Pope Benedict on Marxism & Pope Cologne | Gary Johnson | Sign Off – Goodnight

SUIT REPORT: Black pin stripe suite | Light blue shirt | Navy tie /light blue stripe

VIDEOS: Monday, April 3, 2012

Intro – 4/2/12

Tonight, trouble in the beef industry: the mortality rate among the steers is frightening. Then, the pope pays a visit to Cuba. I bet he’s scouting short stops for the Cardinals. And my guest, Governor Gary Johnson was a republican candidate and is now a libertarian candidate. Next: Manchurian candidate.

Colbert Super PAC – Super Fun Pack Treasure Hunt

Notable Quotables:

The Beefstate Governors

Notable Quotables:

Yahweh or No Way – Christian Card Counters, Pope Benedict on Marxism & Pope Cologne

Notable Quotables:

Gary Johnson

My guest tonight is the former governor of New Mexico and an advocate for legalizing marijuana. Please welcome Gary Johnson! I’ve never heard my audience cheer so hard for a federal offense.

Stephen: Hey, let’s get high and gay married. That’s the message? That’s your message. That’s your message.

Gov. Johnson: And so the libertarian party is now 40 years old, in a poll three months ago 50% of American’s support legalizing marijuana. Who, perhaps, is singularly most responsible for that? Perhaps it the libertarian party, which, initially, kooks. Today, you know, not so kooky. Everything that the libertarian party is talking about today, I think, is not kooky at all, it’s really the prescription for what ails America.

Stephen: Okay, so if that’s the case, if that’s the case, you ran as a republican. Again, your a two term governor of, uh Mexico?

Gov. Johnson: Nuevo Mexico

Stephen: Nuevo, well you say potato I say burrito.

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Stephen: If you actually get the nomination in Los Vegas, will the nomination stay in Los Vegas? Because that could be a problem, you want to get the word out there.

Gov. Johnson: You hit on it. We want to get the word out there. We want to be at 15%. Right now 82% of Americans would consider voting for a third party candidate. Uh, I think the third party is the libertarian party. The largest segment of American politics today are independents. So, who’s representing them?

Stephen: Well, Governor, when you’re in Vegas, if you have time remember the words of Jesus, hold on 16 and split your aces.

Sign Off – Goodnight