I was not sure how to name this part cause I want a lot of people to resonate with it but this is as close as I can get, in words, to when I began to really question myself. When I grew up in my teen years I never knew there was something I could do to do feel at peace with my hidden self, I didn't even know it was a possibility to transition. So not that where I grow up is a dangerous place to be gay or trans or anything like that but more because it was a small connected town in the northeast and it wasn't something I was exposed to. That is until college and freedom and classes that literally will teach you that all these things aren't weird and are possible! Well sometimes when we find hope it also terrifies us, and we go running deeper into that closet... well atleast I did. Not only did I do this but I did it better than anyone, you can say I was number one.