Less than a minute to go in the 2nd period, down 1-0 to Buffalo. Just enough time for a rush, some sustained pressure in the offensive zone and possibly get a late goal to tie things up heading into intermission. So what do the Avalanche do with the final 60 seconds of the period? What any great beer league hockey team would do. They take 30 seconds to break out of their own zone after a few miscues, then they charge through the neutral zone with minimal speed, try to dangle the blue line and ultimately end up going offsides to blow the play dead. That’s textbook beer league hockey right there and as a Beer League Hero, I would know.

I know that I don’t have much room to talk as a Flyers fan since that team might have a hard time beating an ACHA team at the moment. But it’s incredible how truly awful the Colorado Avalanche are at playing men’s professional ice hockey. Tell me you haven’t seen that breakout before at a 10:45 puck drop at your local rink while some 30+ year old divorced guys try to relive the glory days before having to wake up at 4:30 the next morning to get to work on time. And these guys get paid millions to do it. If anything, I’m thankful that these guys exist. Because it gives me hope that if one day I continue to be as bad at hockey as I currently am, I could one day play for the Avalanche as well. They give me hope. They are my inspiration. For that, I am sincerely grateful. It’s just gonna be a shame when they lose Landeskog and/or Duchene in the next 2 weeks at the Trade Deadline. They’re already currently on pace to lose about 100 games this year in an 82-game regular season. Who knows if it’s even possible for this team to get any worse by the end of the year.