In most parts of the world the health of men and boys is disproportionately worse than that of women and girls. This gender disparity, according to a Bulletin of The World Health Organization, has to do with several factors including occupational hazards, a higher likelihood to engage in risk taking behaviours, and traditional views about masculinity.

As an at-home dad this third contributing factor to the health gap between men and women resonates with me. Gender stereotypes and western society’s traditional views on parenting challenge my masculinity in different aspects of my life – I am not my family’s breadwinner and my role is that of a nurturer. Although there is progression in the public’s view of men as primary caregivers and we are beginning to witness a higher level of acceptance of this “non-traditional” role for men, certain aspects included in traditional beliefs about masculinity outside of vocation remain somewhat intact – specifically, views surrounding a man’s willingness to be emotionally or physically vulnerable.

It is a stark reality that men are less likely than women to report illness, whether physical or mental.

This is a problem directly linked to the notion of masculinity and the stigma that envelops men’s openness about their health. We don’t want to be seen as weak or cast as complainers: we try to “suck it up” when we feel sick, “toughen up” when we are injured, and “work through it” when we struggle mentally. It becomes an independent battle that is counterproductive in times that we need support or require aid. This denial of vulnerability is rooted in the societal belief that we will be rewarded for our strengths and penalized for our weaknesses.

The approach on how we, as men, communicate about our health needs to change.

Especially as we become dads. As role models to our sons, it is a father’s responsibility to dispel traditional views about masculinity and how it associates with health. We need to teach our kids to speak about their physical state or mental issues or emotional well being, so that there will be a greater likelihood, and less hesitation to seek help when needed.

As fathers we need to cast aside the notion that if we do not talk about our health concerns, they won’t become “real”. There is often an underlying fear in men that if we are forthcoming about illness the worst health scenario will befall on us and we will be labeled as ‘sick’. Fueling this fear is the concern that as a result of our deteriorating health, we will not be able to provide for or protect our loved ones, transforming our traditional roles. This is not a reality but a mindset. If we perpetuate this pretense as an example to our children, and aren’t openly proactive about addressing our health, there is a heightened chance that our sons will adopt this flawed mentality.

It is up to dads to disrupt the perception of weakness surrounding mental and physical wellness in boys and men.

This disruption needs to be initiated through raising awareness about overall health at home. Talk to your kids about your health history, be emotionally transparent, make it known that your available to talk without judgment, make them aware of outside resources, become involved in men’s health initiatives like Movember as a team, and create the lifelong habit of seeing a physician regularly.

Balancing gender disparity between men and women’s health starts with parents. It is essential that us as fathers tip the scale by letting our son’s know that talking about health doesn’t make them weak and that issues affecting men’s health are common among all men, directly or indirectly. Now is our chance to raise an informed generation of informed husbands, sons and brothers who will revolutionize the idea of masculinity so that it will no longer work against them, but benefit them.

Here are some online resources to help you continue the conversation about men’s health:

The Movember Foundation

Canadian Men’s Health Foundation

Don’t Change Much

Health Canada

AboutMen.ca