The owners of the world’s most famous golf course, and the single most important sports venue in the southeastern United States, are requesting some municipal assistance in the effort to improve their property, and some of you people are pitching a bitch fit.

Allow me to ask the naysayers of the proposed “Berckmans Road shift and land swap deal” to pull their noses out of the latest issue of “Curmudgeon Monthly” for a moment and try to understand exactly what is going on with Augusta National Golf Club’s plan for the expansion and beautification of the area.

While Stacey Eidson did a good job last week (“The Breaking of Berckmans Road,” March 26 issue) detailing the concerns of the neighbors surrounding the course, and the fear that somehow their suburban streets and cul-de-sacs were about to be transformed into some kind of “third world bazaar-carnival” atmosphere, perhaps the report failed to convey the one simple constant involving any recent real estate project the organization has initiated: They have a perfect track record when it comes to beauty, efficiency, common sense and economic impact for the area.

When it comes to the many, many changes we have seen in the physical lay of the land surrounding the ANGC, they are batting 1.000.

The dozens and dozens of real estate transactions undertaken in the last 20 years to acquire land on the west side of Berckmans Road, and the north side of Washington Road, have done nothing but enhance the community and made many middle-class home owners comparatively wealthy.

In the process they also bought up and beautified some marginal business properties, not to mention buying, and subsequently razing, a 40-year-old apartment complex that had turned into a crime ridden-demilitarized zone.

They done good.

Informed sources tell me that almost all residential homeowners who were approached by agents of the ANGC were offered a minimum of 150 percent of appraised value as a starting point, and many ended up with checks totaling two to six times that amount, and some much more, before all was said and done. The rolling meadows that are now used for free patron parking and equipment storage are quite nice to look at 51 weeks of the year. And for that one other week, chances are if you are close enough to see all the cars, you are part of the “happy congestion.”

But back to the project at hand.

Berckmans Road, as we currently know and love it, is a 60-plus year old thoroughfare that has been in need of widening and improvements for at least 40 years.

Steve Cassell is the City of Augusta’s point man on the project, and aside from Jack Nicklaus, he may be the most important Ohio State Buckeye who has recently dealt professionally with matters concerning the business of tournament. Full disclosure, Steve is my brother-in-law, and one of my best friends, but no one can deny that his traffic innovations and changes over the last decade have been a magnificent success.

In his first days and weeks as the city’s traffic engineer, he was amazed to learn that traffic patterns had not been better coordinated during tournament week, and he made it his personal goal to improve what had become a nightmare. While the first few years were a learning experience, his ideas and instructions have turned what was once “a mess from any direction” into a logical and free-flowing system in and out of the congested areas.

But he was always perplexed about Berckmans Road. “Man… they were land locked. Residential property to the west, which meant very expensive and messy construction if we went forward with road widening projects. You simply could not widen the road the other way, heck, you would be right up against the green at No. 4 (hole No. 4 at ANGC) and right on top of the tee box at No. 5.”

Not to mention all kinds of utility line issues, as some of the city’s main water lines from the Savannah River run right through that area.

All that aside, Berckmans Road has been in need of a serious overhaul for decades. So the relatively recent moves by the ANGC to acquire land and move patrons parking to the west of their main campus has been a perfect opportunity to get some things done.

The plan to swap property with the city gives the current Berckmans Road to the ANGC for land owned by the club starting at the Alexander Drive intersection with Washington Road, becoming the “new” Berckmans Road.

Keep in mind, if all goes as planned, the new Berckmans Road, and the right of way that goes with it, will be approximately 100 feet wide, instead of the current 60 feet. It will also come with a sidewalk (which was impossible to have given the current lay of the land) and a landscaping deal that will see all aesthetic maintenance handled by the staff of the ANGC.

The neighbors in the Jamestown subdivision, just one block down Berckmans Road from the edge of the ANGC property and adjacent to the new parking areas, have complained that they have been “kept in the dark” about all these proposed changes and the impact they could have on the neighborhood.

Cassell calls “foul” on that, and he has personally conducted a number of public hearings and meeting discussing these ideas over the last several years.

“I have had the same office number all along… 706-821-1850. Can you put that in a headline? Any questions or concerns, call me. How big can we make that number, 706-821-1850?” Cassell queried.

This big, Steve:

Steve Cassell, Augusta Traffic Engineer

706-821-1850

It is the intention of the ANGC to “move their fence” and expand their property in ways that I am told will make international headlines for years to come, and blow the minds of local residents in ways that you will not believe. But they could not do it with the current Berckmans Road running right square through the middle of their property. It simply wouldn’t work.

Think outside the box. Ten years ago, the notion of Berckmans Place, the palatial, private, on-premise hospitality facility constructed a few years ago by the club, would have been dismissed out of hand. The idea of a children’s “Drive, Chip, & Putt” competition, the Sunday before tournament week, would have been laughed out of the room. Female members at Augusta… don’t get me started.

You Jamestown people, don’t sell your property, not yet. Next week I will have some exclusive information in this space and never before revealed numbers that will very likely generate headlines.

The people whose leadership and innovation put the Augusta National in the top 10 of every credible list of legendary sports venues ever made, are still in control.

Watch what they do next.