I had no idea there were Christian girls on YouTube making videos documenting their morning routine with Jesus. But it’s true! It involves prayer, and Bible reading, and looking at the Sun to admire God’s creations, and a whole bunch of things I don’t understand because my morning routine consists solely of swearing at the alarm.

But it makes you wonder: What’s the atheist equivalent of this morning routine?

Rachel Oates has the answer.

She definitely got breakfast right. How else could we get the energy to hate God all day?

