Miami spent less than a day in the market for a new head football coach. Mark Richt retired suddenly Sunday morning, and former Canes defensive coordinator Manny Diaz — former being a liberal choice of words here — was named his replacement that night.

Diaz has spent the last few years coordinating the side of the ball Miami isn’t terrible at. In fact, he’s built one of the best defenses in the country, creating the Turnover Chain in 2017 and backing it with strong play for two seasons.

But with Miami’s recruiting in relative disarray and the offense struggling terribly, Diaz’s staffing decisions will be crucial. He needs assistants who will get the proper buy-in from fans, boosters, and recruits alike. Here are suggestions for every key position.

Offensive coordinator and QBs coach The Rock

Because it’s all about The U, baby, and because even though The Rock was a defensive lineman, he got experience working with young quarterbacks on his HBO show, Ballers. The Rock would be a solid head coaching candidate and gives the program instant credibility.

The Rock can also serve as head strength coach and recruiting coordinator while filming movies and appearing at WrestleMania, because he’s already proved capable of working nine jobs at once.

Defensive coordinator and LBs coach Ray Lewis

Because it’s all about The U, baby, and because Generation Z loves nothing more than paying close attention while older men talk at length about themselves.

Running backs coach Frank Gore

Because it’s all about The U, baby. Also because he went to high school in Coral Gables, was a star at Miami, and has been playing the game long enough to understand new-age schemes. He will tickle Miami boosters who remember his playing days, but he’s also young enough to appeal to the modern running back recruit, too.

Receivers coach Michael Irvin

Because it’s all about The U, baby, and you can’t overestimate the benefit of hiring a coach with TV experience who understands the modern media environment.

long time coming but it's here now. @canesfootball beats @fsufootball we r really on r way back. my reaction in my suite when we scored pic.twitter.com/rnxEtjypEG — Michael Irvin (@michaelirvin88) October 7, 2017

Tight ends coach Jeremy Shockey

Because it’s all about The U, baby, and because Shockey’s been known to work some Miami camps and make calls to Canes recruits in recent years. And because he’s known for great sportsmanship and to be a great ambassador for the game. When Jeremy Shockey tells a recruit’s parents he’ll mold their son into a man, they know he means it.

Offensive line coach Bryant McKinnie

Because it’s all about The U, baby. That’s all.

Defensive line coach Warren Sapp

Because it’s all about The U, baby.

Cornerbacks coach Lane Kiffin

Because it’s all about The U, baby, and because any coach who can tweet at hundreds of people to “come to the faU” can easily lose two syllables without missing a beat. Also, because Miami isn’t overflowing with NFL corners who are more deserving of this spot.

“But Kiffin’s not a Cane,” you might say.

Is he not? Is he really not? I think we all know that deep down, he’s close enough.

Lane Kiffin just tweetin' away. Damn I wanted him to be our coach. #letsbejerks — StateOfTheU.com (@TheStateOfTheU) April 27, 2016

Safeties coach Ed Reed

Because it’s all about The U, baby, and because who better to teach young DBs about the modern game than a safety who literally changed the sport?

Coaching Miami, YES! I will. — Ed Reed (@TwentyER) December 30, 2018

It’s time to reel him him.

Special teams coordinator Devin Hester

Because it’s all about The U, baby, and because in addition to his duties as return game coordinator, Hester can personally humble Miami’s punter in practice, over and over, every single day. Not that it matters, because Miami is never punting ever again.

University president Pitbull

Because it’s all about The U, baby, and because an international brand like The U demands a truly international spokesman.

Athletic director Nevin Shapiro

Because it’s all about The U, baby, and because Miami will want to send an instant message that it’s on the side of expanded player benefits and not the cronies at the NCAA.

Mayor of Miami Uncle Luke

Because it’s all about The U, baby, and because he already has the right staffing ideas.

I am not wavering from my original choice Lane kiffin simple as that and I know he's going to bring Jalen Hurts and surprised Ed Reed is the defensive back coach. Instant offense this is a no-brainer — Luther Luke Campbell (@unclelukereal1) December 30, 2018

And because he’s demonstrated his ambition to hold this office before.