How have I lived this way for this long? I feel like I don’t even know you.

This week, plunked down at home during social distancing, it’s not just spouses and partners people are questioning — it’s home itself.

For those who are used to spending much of their day outside the home, the domestic space may have previously served a handful of basic functions, as a backdrop. Last week my hair stylist admitted via text on his eighth day of self-quarantine that it was the longest stretch he’d stayed in his house in 23 years. I had only been at mine for longer during maternity leave.

For those with a desire — and the resources — to connote a certain kind of idyllic domesticity, the home’s function was primarily determined by aesthetics. This or that design layout is how a nice home “should” look, according to social media.

But shoulds are unhelpful at a time when the demands on the home have increased exponentially: Dining tables are doubling as classrooms. Living rooms are home offices. Kitchens that ably moved takeout dinners and microwaved plates are now bracing through three meals and three snacks a day. The sofa, once only for Netflix and occasional guests, is now the site of back-to-back Zoom sessions. (Followed by Netflix.)