Well, maybe they do realize they’re doing it, but I just want to imagine that it’s a happy accident. I don’t want to believe that any guys are actually that sexily cunning, and are using their powers for evil. Let me live in my peaceful ignorance.

1. Having a perfectly subtle scent of cologne/aftershave that doesn’t overpower but leaves you with that “boy smell” that you just want to get high off of the rest of the day. (God forbid they let you borrow some article of clothing, in which case you might get some sort of lung infection from vigorously inhaling the fibers through your nose.)

2. Lingering on a hug for just a moment too long.

3. Looking you directly in the eyes when they talk to you, with perhaps the occasional glance down to your lips while you’re talking to them.

4. Licking their lips gently when they’re in the middle of a sentence, and allowing themselves to take that pause in the sentence and let everyone linger on their words.

5. Being really charming and kind with servers/bartenders while at restaurants, and being at once deferential to their knowledge and sure about what he likes. (This includes ordering for the both of you if you’ve already told him what you want.)

6. Leaving nice tips. (But giving you way more than just the tip, HEY-0.) (I’m sorry, Grandma.) (Please don’t be reading this.)

7. Saying your name unexpectedly at the end of a sentence, especially in that lower register where you can tell they’re being more serious than usual.

8. Sighing in a way that you totally imagine sounds the same way as when they’re doing it.

9. When found in a tough situation, being able to handle everything completely and never showing a glimmer of panic or desperation, and even going so far as to tell you “don’t worry about it,” because they have it under control.

10. Giving you that sly smile when you make a joke, the one that says, “You’re crazy, but I like that about you.”

11. When they are effortlessly good with kids, and kids feel really comfortable around them in a way they usually don’t with grown-ups. (This goes double for little girls in floofy dresses. Grown men who are able to have a tea party with a little tiny girl and get totally into it without worrying about looking “girly” are essentially kryptonite for the ovaries.)

12. Laughing really hard at things with you, the kind where you basically start crying/get a tummy ache because you’re so completely un-self-conscious.

13. Speaking in a really hushed tone when they’re talking about something serious, one that makes you come closer to them while they’re telling you so that you don’t miss a word.

14. Dancing with you, even if they’re terrible at it, because they’re there to have fun and they’re not concerned with how they look over something as silly and fun as dancing.

15. Being really good at their job, and taking it very seriously. (Catching them on a business call, or working on an important project — and realizing just how much they contribute to their team — basically makes you feel like they’re some sexy Patrick Bateman-type that doesn’t murder call girls with a chainsaw.)

16. When they touch you almost unconsciously, to either reassure you or to get your attention, and are both firm and soft in their manner at the same time, giving you the “I respect you immensely, but yet know what I want” feeling.

17. Complimenting you unexpectedly on something sincere-yet-specific (and in a way that lets you know they don’t expect anything out of it).

18. Helping little old ladies with their groceries/carrying heavy things/crossing the street in traffic. And addressing them all politely and respectfully and adorably.

19. Remembering little things that you talked about a while ago, and following up on them because he’s actually curious about it. You can get so used to people being self-serving or oblivious that when someone pays attention, it can feel weird — but you should expect nothing less than people who care as much as you do. After all, if you really think about it, there is nothing hotter than feeling like someone sees you as a human being.