"Overall, it seems you're still better off to be a man," said the article in this very newspaper.

"Excellent!" I thought, excited to find out how good I had it because I've been gifted with testicles.

Livin' the life.

"Men are better paid, but women are better educated," said the report, inspired by data released by the Australian Bureau of Statistics, which also showed "men dominate top executive jobs ... while women do most of the unpaid work and care at home".

Not being an exec, who does his own housework and looks after his daughter three days a week, I thought there's more to "better" than just money but ... that was it. The story went on to say "women live longer", "are less at risk of violence" and, "despite widespread perceptions, men are the main victims of crime".