When they try to take on the subject things get awkward, at best. At worst, you get something that leaves you shaking your head, while staring quietly at the wall for several hours. Like...

If there's anyone who knows how to handle sex in a mature and tasteful way, well, it's not comic book writers.

5 Superman's Sex Tape

So why is Superman whoring himself in front of the cameras? Does he need money to pay for the Fortress of Solitude? No, it's all because of this guy here.

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The guy, who looks like Slimer from Ghostbusters dressed up like Indiana Jones for Halloween, is named Sleez. Using whatever the hell powers allow you to do such a thing, he brainwashed two superheroes into his control, Big Barda and freaking Superman. So, did he send both heroes out to steal all the gold in the world? Kill all the other superheroes and take over the universe?

Nope, he wanted them do a porno flick, and film it. Which, we have to admit, is the same thing we would do.

Sleez, by the way, is a member of the New Gods space pantheon and was Darkseid's best pal in the whole world. But while Darkseid had the cool position of god of evil, Sleez was the god of porn. Darkseid became embarrassed of being seen with the guy and kicked him out.

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Get the hell out, and take your stupid stripper's pole with you!

It gets weirder. After Sleez has shot his Superman/Barda porn movie, Darkseid finds himself a copy because he has agents on Earth whose only job is to find new porn in specialized stores for him. This is not a joke--or at least not our joke--this is actually in the story.

So there he was, watching his Earthling porn when he suddenly sees Big Barda getting her freak on. Barda, by the way, is married to another superhero, Mr. Miracle. So Darkseid does the most evil, supervillian thing he can think to do: Show Mr. Miracle the tape of his wife getting what is surely the best sex of her life from Superman.

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Of course you don't tell him what's on the tape, you just make him watch it.

You truly are the god of evil, Darkseid.

Mr. Miracle, Barda's husband, quickly finds Sleez's movie studio and stops his wife and Superman from showing up on Porntube.

Sleez tries to escape through the sewers but Superman follows him. Faced with a life behind bars and without porn, he decides to end it all. He lights a match and the concentrated gases in the sewer make this story end just the way it ran, as a massive explosion of shit.