The Bruins and Penguins just threw down one of the sloppiest, most undisciplined, greasiest periods of hockey in recent memory — and it was the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen in my life.

The two clubs combined for eight goals on just 21 shots during the first period of Thursday night’s game, with both Penguins goaltenders — Tristan Jarry and Casey DeSmith — along with Bruins ‘tender Tuukka Rask combining for an impossibly bad .619 save % over the 20-minute slaughter-fest.

This strange, strange goal sums up the opening frame well:

Casey DeSmith doing his best impression of an NHL99 goalie glitching out pic.twitter.com/CreAYMfcyW — Yahoo Sports NHL (@YahooSportsNHL) March 2, 2018





It was the first time a pair of teams combined for eight or more goals in the first period of a game since March 2013, when the Coyotes and Predators put up a nine-spot through 20 minutes. The Penguins, who haven’t won in Boston in over three years, were outplayed substantially by the Bruins in the opening period, but managed to slip three by All Star Tuukka Rask on just seven shots.

With Matt Murray sidelined with concussion, the Penguins’ netminding was a trainwreck as Casey DeSmith posted the worst start of his young career, allowing three goals on just five shots to open the contest. That paved the way for Tristan Jarry, who didn’t fare much better — surrendering a couple softies on just nine shots against.

All in all, eight goals were scored by eight different players, while Evgeni Malkin, Torey Krug, David Pastrnak, Riley Nash and Rick Nash all had multi-point periods. The beat marched on in the second period, as Krejci completed his hat trick and the Bruins managed a 8-3 lead after 40 minutes.

Inject this craziness straight into my veins, please.