Preseason rankings are stupid, and we all care about them. Let's just agree on those two things right up front.

There is no good reason for them, they muddy up the first half of the season, they're based on nothing but resounding speculation and wanting to say nice things, and rankings are social constructs. Couldn't agree more. And we all care.

That said, you are correct that this year's rankings are especially stupid. Can you believe how highly ranked your rival is? And can you believe how much love they're giving that team that got blown out in that big game? Neither can I.

Here's your annotated guide to something like what 2015's preseason top 25 looks like. This isn't my top 25, because mine would correctly rank your team and expose your rivals as trash. Every team is bad and overrated, especially the ones you don't like.

I used an emoji code (key below), because it's not even worth explaining in detail how overrated and bad all of these teams are.

Key

ALWAYS OVERRATED (as if that has anything to do with this season) ALWAYS OVERRATED (as if that has anything to do with this season)

Concerns with coaching/strategy/etc., concerns that are probably overblown Concerns with coaching/strategy/etc., concerns that are probably overblown

Relatively exaggerated QB woes Relatively exaggerated QB woes

Ain't never won nothing (i.e., hasn't won 100 championships in the last week or so) Ain't never won nothing (i.e., hasn't won 100 championships in the last week or so)

Will never get into Playoff with that schedule (team's schedule is probably fine) Will never get into Playoff with that schedule (team's schedule is probably fine)

People seem to think (A) this team cheats at something and (B) that matters People seem to think (A) this team cheats at something and (B) that matters