So the question remains: How in Dino DNA do you relate to someone who has never seen Jurassic Park?

The first step is acceptance

As much as you WANT the entire rest of the world to have seen Jeff Goldblum shirtless and lounging calmly despite being in mortal danger from genetically re-animated dinosaurs, you must accept that there are people who haven’t.

Accept this. The sooner you make room for acceptance, the sooner you can look past their never-having-seen Jurassic Park as just something that happens sometimes, not a character flaw.

Change the subject

So you’re hanging out with someone at a restaurant and your meals have just arrived. Looking at the large portions, you say, “Hold onto your butts!” But the person sitting across from you doesn’t get the reference. After all, the line is from Jurassic Park, and as you’ve just found out, they’ve never seen it.

As much as it pains you to do so, try and change the subject if this happens. Something about sports or the weather or Jurassic P — NO, see! You almost fell into that trap again!

It’s okay, go easy on yourself. This will take practice and discipline. You’re doing a good job.

Life finds a way.

You desperately want another person to appreciate your Southern-drawly impression of the phrase “Diiino DNAyyy.” But they don’t get it.

Here’s the thing: You can still have a relationship with this person. Life finds a way. It’ll just take some reframing of your attitude and expanding your universe beyond the 2 hours and 7 minutes that is the film Jurassic Park.

With a little patience, understanding, acceptance, and broadening your conversational horizons, you CAN have the relationships you desire, regardless of whether the other person has seen Jurassic Park.

After all this, don’t forget to pat yourselves on the back.

You’re making some big steps here. So don’t forget to treat yo’self!

Go get a massage. Get some ice cream. Buy a new TV and, I don’t know, watch a movie about a theme park full of reanimated dinosaurs gone amok.

Whatever you do, spare no expense. You deserve it.